#this season is looking like it will be a bisexual’s nightmare (affectionate)
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OBSESSED with Murph‘s looks. The shirts. The haircut. Wow
Thank you for supporting my hot murph agenda. This is so real he looks so good
#this season is looking like it will be a bisexual’s nightmare (affectionate)#dimension 20#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#asks#anon#brian murphy#hot murph week
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i know you by heart - chapter 1
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Series Chapter Index | Read on AO3 | Complete
Rating: Explicit, 18+, here be smut Series tags: The Last of Us, The Last of Us (HBO), Prospect, Joel Miller x Ezra, Joel & Ellie, Ezra & Cee, Joel is bad at feelings and relationships, Ellie is a little shit (affectionate), mostly follows canon after season 1, SMUT, gay sex, bisexual!Joel, period-typical homophobia, light angst, romance, age gap (~10ish years), I've probably forgotten some so please let me know <3
“Tell me again how it happened.”
It’s a standoff in the kitchen. Ellie’s face, flushed and furious, twists in a pout. Joel grips the back of a dining chair with one tight fist.
One week. It’s been one fucking week since school started, and Ellie has already come home with the pink slip of all pink slips.
“She tried to take my pen. Twice.”
“And?”
“So I…I took my knife out…”
“Uh-huh.”
“...and I stabbed it into her desk…”
Joel winces.
“...and I told her if she tried that shit again I’d do the same to her fucking finger.”
“Ellie–”
“It’s not my fucking fault no one taught her to keep her hands to herself!”
“I know, and she–she shouldn’t have done that, Ellie, but you can’t just–”
“It’s not like I actually stabbed someone, Joel!”
“Doesn’t fuckin’ matter, kid. You can’t–you can’t do that shit here. This ain’t FEDRA. There’s no hole. Keep it up and they’re liable to put us outside the damn wall.”
“Tommy wouldn’t–“
“He doesn’t run this place. An’ Maria’s already on my ass about…everythin’.”
“Maybe we should leave, then,” she huffs.
“You don’t mean that.”
“We made out okay. We could do it again.”
“Ellie,” his voice softens. He draws his palms down his face. The start of a headache pulses behind his eyes. “Look, I know it’s…different. But we’re here now. We gotta make do.”
Four months in Jackson. Four months since he shot his way out of a hospital in Salt Lake City and carried the unconscious girl to safety. Four months since she asked for the truth and he told her the whopper of all lies instead.
When he thinks about it that way, things are going about as well as he has any right to expect.
He’d hoped going to school would give her some structure, that she’d make a few friends, but so far, every morning has been a trudge, every night a standoff. When she’s not clinging to his side like a lost lamb or waking from nightmares to crawl into his bed, she’s hurling sharp words and slamming doors and stomping around.
Months on the road together, but he’s never seen her so goddamn bratty.
He’s taking a lot of deep breaths. He’s counting to ten. He’s trying not to see the judgmental frowns from his sister-in-law when Ellie storms out of a family gathering or calls him an asshole at the caf in front of the whole fuckin’ town.
She’s never had the space to act out, he reminds himself. She’s never been fed enough, warm enough, safe enough, loved enough, and he gets the brunt of her anger. The way Sarah would come home after a long day at school and turn into a grouchy wildebeest for him after being an angel for her teachers.
It’s normal, he tells himself on the worst nights. Ellie’s making up for fourteen years of repression.
But he’s tired and she’s strumming his last nerve like it’s a fuckin’ guitar.
She’s holding out another note, this one hand-written and co-signed by members of the council. He notes Maria’s signature at the top with some disdain.
“Counseling,” Joel sighs, skimming it. “Mandated. Twelve weeks.”
“You’re not really gonna make me go, are you? C’mon, man, it’s a death sentence!”
“Hardly. You’re lucky they didn’t suspend you.”
“I wish they had. Then I wouldn’t have to go to that stupid fucking school.”
“Ellie–”
“I hate it here,” she spits out. Her lower lip trembles and he has to look away, eking out a tight breath.
“Yeah, kid. I know. But you gotta give it a chance.”
“I did, and it sucks.”
“You’re not giv–”
“Going to my room,” she huffs, already moving for the stairs.
“You need to eat first,” he says, gritting his teeth when she rolls her eyes. “And you’re grounded.”
Those words have never come out of his mouth. He doesn’t even know what being grounded looks like in this day and age.
“What?! Joel–”
“You heard me,” he says, making it up as he goes. “Two weeks. You’re back here every night after your assignments. No wanderin’ around with your friends.”
“Lucky for me I don’t have any fucking friends.”
“That ain’t–“
“This is bullshit,” she seethes, then turns on her heel and stomps up the stairs.
“Damnit, Ellie, you need to eat–”
“I’m not hungry!”
The door at the top of the stairs slams shut, ending the conversation and leaving Joel to collapse into a chair with his face in his hands.
“Yeah,” he mutters to himself. “Yeah, this is bullshit.”
One week later she’s sulking over breakfast at the house.
“The guy wants to talk to you,” she says through a mouthful of eggs.
“‘The guy’? And close your mouth when you chew.”
Ellie wrinkles her nose, opening her mouth wide to show him her half-chewed breakfast, a move that’s painfully reminiscent of a different time, a different kid.
“I told you at dinner. The counselor guy.”
He frowns. “It’s a guy?”
She rolls her eyes. “And women can even be doctors! Dude, you are so old .”
“S’not what I meant, smartass,” he mutters. “I just…I know you’ve had some, uh…issues with…guys.”
Since Silver Lake , he doesn’t say.
“Only the creepy ones,” she says, stabbing a piece of potato. “Ezra’s not creepy. He’s, like, cool. He has a huge record collection.”
“Uh-huh. An’ he needs to see me why?”
“I don’t fucking know, dude. Unlike you, I didn’t give him the third degree.”
He bites his tongue. “Alright. When?”
“Before school. Today.”
Joel looks at the clock, then back at Ellie. 7:50 .
“So we need to go…right now,” he mutters, draining his coffee and gathering his dishes to put them in the sink. “Thanks for the notice.”
“I told you last night! Not my fault you’re deaf.”
Admittedly, she’d talked a lot at dinner last night. Mostly about how some kid named Dina was a jerk who deserved to have her finger taken off for being a ‘fucking klepto’ with her pen. But he’d been so tired and the headache behind his eyes won’t give him a rest.
“Alright, let’s go,” he sighs. “Don’t forget your bag.”
They step out into the streets of Jackson on a mild September morning. It’s the rush hour–if a town of a few hundred can be said to have a rush hour–with shift changes on the wall and everyone off to their assigned duties. They pass familiar faces; neighbors Joel still doesn’t have names for, kids he recognizes from Ellie’s school who give them a wide berth. Joel hunches inward, following the maroon cast of her sweatshirt through clusters of Jackson residents.
“You don’t have a brother, do you?” she says out of the blue.
“You know I do,” he frowns.
“No duh. But you don’t have another brother, right?”
“Not that I’m aware of, kid.”
“Like, what if your dad had a secret family–”
“Christ, where do you come up with this stuff?”
“C’mon, it can happen! I just��I wondered–”
“What the heck are you gettin' at, kid? Spit it out.”
“It’s nothin’,” she says, but there’s a weird little smile on her face. “You’ll see.”
She leads him to the little house at the other end of town and knocks on the blue door. Ellie keeps looking up at him with the same funny smirk.
A dark-eyed man answers, peering through the screen. Dark, fitted T-shirt, slim black jeans. Younger than Joel by at least ten years, probably more, with a wide smile and messy black-brown curls with an odd streak of white at his temple.
He looks like a fuckin’ punk.
“Hi, Ezra,” Ellie says breezily. “This is Joel.”
“Hello, young prodigy,” he smiles, drawling in a southern accent that Joel can’t quite place. “Come in, come in both of you…join me in my humble abode.”
He leads them inside and to the right, to a little den just off the entry. It’s a snug office with a couch and chair, a coffee table in the center, and bookshelves lining the walls on either side. A record player sits on a podium in one corner.
Joel puts out his hand, realizing too late the other man isn’t able to reciprocate, lacking an arm with which to do so. Ellie watches with a smug smirk, lips twitching a little as Joel drops his right hand and fumbles through a handshake with his left. He shoots her a glare.
Couldn’t have mentioned that?
She shrugs, feigning a wide-eyed innocence, then looks between the two men with a kind of manic glee, as if waiting for something.
“...what?” Joel finally asks.
“You don’t see it?” She gestures to the other man.
“I don’t–”
“Jeez, I know you’re deaf but I didn’t think you were blind, too,” she groans. “He looks like you! If you weren’t, like, ancient.”
Joel’s face flushes as Ezra tries to hide a smile behind his hand.
“Enough of that, you little shi–smartypants,” Joel mutters.
“I suspect your young prodigy here gets the sense we might be of blood relation based on a similar, uh, distinguished profile.”
“That’s not, uh…that’s not possible, kid.”
“I agree,” Ezra says smoothly. “The universe is rife with serendipitous occurrences, and I do believe that’s what we have here. The mind is a funny thing. We see what we want to see, Ellie.”
“Seriously?!”
“Your dad here–”
“He’s not my dad,” Ellie corrects automatically. Joel can’t help but feel a pang of indignation at the speed with which she pipes up.
“My apologies,” Ezra murmurs. “I stand corrected. This is your…?”
“He’s just Joel.”
“Of course, gem. Just Joel,” Ezra smiles in his direction. “So I asked your Joel here to ensure you understood what we’re doing. As your guardian, Joel needs to be an integral part of this process.”
“Yeah, ‘bout that–what exactly are we doin’ again?” Joel asks.
“I suspect your young prodigy here is finding the adjustment to life in Jackson a bit…finicky. I’m here to help ease that transition in whatever way I can.”
“You can start by telling the other kids to stop fucking touching my stuff,” Ellie adds.
“Christ, Ellie–”
Ezra holds up his hand, cutting off Joel’s growl and addressing the girl. “Let’s not get weighted down by the minutiae of the situation we find ourselves in, gem. Suffice it to say, we have some work to do, and we need to do it cooperatively.”
Ellie crosses her arms and huffs, but Ezra’s easy manner seems to soothe something in the girl.
“Now that you’ve delivered your…Joel…to me, he and I are going to have a little tête-à-tête . Nothing damning, just the facts. And you, if I’m not mistaken, will be late to school.”
He leans down to scribble something on a notepad, then hands it to Ellie. “Give this to your teacher.”
“You go straight to school an’ home after chores,” Joel adds, watching the late slip disappear into the pocket of Ellie’s jeans. “You’re still grounded, ‘member?”
“Like you’d let me forget,” she mutters, trudging out the door, leaving it cracked slightly.
They hear the front door open and shut, but Ezra holds up one finger, watching the entry with sly eyes.
Wait.
Joel catches his drift.
“Ellie,” he says.
“Aw, c’mon, man,” she grumbles from the entry. “If you’re gonna talk about me, I should get to hear it.”
“We’re not going to talk about you, gem,” Ezra says. “But this is a private conversation between your esteemed guardian and myself. Please give us your discretion and make haste.”
“Ugh, fine.”
Ezra goes to the office door and gently shuts it. Suddenly closed in the small room with a stranger, Joel feels a familiar but unwelcome prickle of fear take root. It’s the same feeling that has him sleeping with a gun under his mattress and locking his door at night, despite Tommy’s assurances that Jackson is safe as houses.
Without thinking, he reaches for his holster–the holster that isn’t there, because he doesn’t wear it unless he’s on patrol, because Jackson is a community and not the fucking QZ. It’s a subtle tic, but Ezra notices.
“We can open it if you’d prefer to partake of the fresh air.”
Joel swallows his fear with a dollop of shame. “S’fine.”
Ezra nods. “Have a seat if you like.”
He takes the chair across the small room, considering Joel through thick lashes. His face is kind, but something about the man’s gaze leaves Joel uneasy, like a bug under a magnifying glass. There’s a warm, simmering coil of tension in his gut that he can’t place.
Indigestion , Joel decides. Too much coffee.
He settles on the couch, old cushions and springs protesting, then leans forward on his knees, glancing around.
“You, uh…you like music?” he says, gesturing to the shelves of vinyl just behind Ezra.
“I do,” he says. “I was fortunate to find this sizable collection in the attic upon being assigned a house. I’ve added to it as I find new treasures to trade. And you?”
“Huh?”
“Do you enjoy music, Joel?”
“Uh, sure, yeah,” he says, rubbing at his lips self-consciously. “Play a little here and there. Guitar.”
Ezra’s face lights up. “Ah! A musician!”
“Hardly.”
“Speaking as one who can’t carry a tune in a bucket, color me impressed.”
The office window is wide open, a cool autumn breeze floating through and rifling the other man’s already unruly hair, but a deep heat has settled at the base of Joel’s neck and the room suddenly feels like a hot summer’s day.
He clears his throat. “So, uh…Ellie says you’re a counselor?”
“Indeed.”
“An’ you have, uh, qualifications? Somethin’ that says you’re the man for the job?”
Ezra grins at this. “I know I don’t look the part of the sage, and I can appreciate your frank concern. I do have some experience in this area, surprising as that may be. Before the outbreak, I was a Master’s student in clinical psychology. Although I didn’t get much opportunity to practice for reasons that should be quite obvious.”
“Right.”
“The fine folks of Jackson have been kind enough to give me a place and a profession that suits my abilities. I’m not much use drawing a plow or riding a horse, I’m afraid,” Ezra continues, nodding to his right shoulder.
“But before we proceed, I should like to understand your expectations and to set a few of my own. For one, I’m not here to play Freud. And I’m hardly qualified to make a diagnosis of any sort,” he continues. “A diagnosis isn’t worth a damn in this day and age, and I suspect you’d agree.”
Joel bites his lip. “Look, uh, I’ll be honest. Last time I set foot in a place like this, it did jack shit and ended in a divorce. So you’ll forgive me if I ain’t entirely comfortable with my…with Ellie…comin’ in here and talkin’ your ear off.”
“Trust that you are not the first to express concern or have a, let’s say, downright suspicious quality about this particular practice. But I hope you’ll humor me when I say that I, like you, only want what is best for Ellie. She’s a bright girl, that one. Very perceptive.”
Joel huffs softly. “Too damn smart for her own good sometimes.”
This elicits a tiny smile, leaving Joel worried he’s spoken too harshly.
“But she’s a good kid,” he adds quickly. “A really…good kid.”
Ezra nods. “I hope you don’t mind my saying so, but I think she could benefit from the ear of a friend. As I said, she’s bright. I wanted to try to get a clearer picture of her through your eyes. Your family dynamic, if you will. I take it there’s no Mrs. Joel? Or…Mr. Joel?”
Joel snorts. “Just me an’ her.”
“And she’s adopted?”
“Somethin’ like that,” Joel murmurs, scratching his chin. “We, uh…I had a job to move her out here. From Boston. Was supposed to find, uh…her relatives…but that didn’t work out and my brother, Tommy, gave us a place here.”
Ezra nods but doesn’t say anything further. He sprawls in the chair, legs spread, almost slouched, one forearm draped over the side. Relaxed but intent, eyebrows drawn together with an unspoken question. Joel swallows, finding his mouth suddenly dry.
“You, uh, need to write this down or anythin’?” Joel coughs, gesturing to the notepad on the coffee table in front of them.
Ezra shakes his head, smiling slightly. “No…no, we’re just having a conversation. No need to put it on the record for now. So…Boston to Jackson. That must have been quite the excursion.”
“You could say that.”
“I expect it wasn’t exactly uneventful?”
“No,” Joel says, almost too quickly. “No, it was, uh…she went through a lot. Stuff no kid should have to see…to do. You’ll have to ask her about it, though. S’not my place to talk for her.”
“I intend to do that,” Ezra nods. “I look forward to getting to know her over the next twelve weeks. And hopefully beyond, if she’ll give me the chance.”
“Don’t get your hopes up,” Joel mutters. “She’s a bit…gunshy. Especially around, uh, men. Even Tommy…she can’t be alone with him, an’ he’s about as tame as they come.”
“But she feels safe with you?”
“Think so. I mean, I’m all she had for months…out there,” he shrugs. “But that went both ways. We’re prob’ly what you shrinks call, uh…codependent.”
Ezra nods, voice softening. “A little codependency can mean the difference between life or death in a difficult time. And I imagine it’s been an adjustment…all this. I know we–I–found it difficult at first. Even the thickest of walls aren’t enough if we don’t feel truly safe in the heart and mind.”
Joel bites his lip. “Yeah…yeah. It’s different.”
“And how about you, Joel?”
“How ‘bout me what?”
“You’ve been through a similar ordeal, I presume, traveling together. And now you find yourself the unexpected father figure to a dynamic and spirited young lady–”
Joel bites back a scoff. “This ain’t about me.”
Ezra shrugs. “I don’t mean to pry, and you’re free to pass on anything you don’t feel comfortable answering, of course. I’m just trying to build a picture in the interest of aiding my work with Ellie.”
The temptation to pass is strong, but that heat in his gut is still there, a distraction loosening his tongue.
“Yeah, I guess it’s, uh…it’s been a lot. For both of us, but mostly her,” he says, rubbing at the back of his neck. “She’s not used to havin’ someone in her corner. She’s…she was an orphan…before.”
He sighs, allowing himself to sink back into the couch cushions, shoulders loosening a fraction.
“I told her not to bring that damn knife to school in the first place,” he says, glancing down at his broken watch. “But she needed it when we were on the road. She’s prob’ly needed it all her damn life. Seems wrong to ask her to give that up when we’ve only been here a few months. Not that she’s s’posed to be waving it around at folks, or…y’know.”
“Mmm,” he says. “Well, I don’t intend to lay blame here. Raising a child…alone…comes with its fair share of hardships and trials. Regardless, it’s a noble endeavor, to take one into your care.”
He snorts. “Think she’s done more to take care of me than the other way around.”
“If I may be so bold…I suspect you’re not giving yourself enough credit.”
“I’m sure she’ll tell you,” Joel says drily. “Kid’s not one to hold back.”
Ezra grins. “I sensed as much.”
He stands, offering his hand, and Joel takes it. The man’s grip is firm and warm and the memory of his touch lingers on Joel’s skin long after he’s left. That warm flare in his gut throbs, a not-unpleasant heat licking gently at the base of his spine, and he finally places it.
It’s been so damn long since he’s felt that particular burn, being on the road for months, never safe, never alone given Ellie’s constant companionship. There was probably a time or two in his early days with Tess when he found himself surprised by desire, but it was easily smothered, tamed, wrested into submission.
That night, Joel tosses and turns and finally gives into the low-level arousal that’s plagued him all damn day, palming himself roughly through his sweats until he’s fully hard.
He imagines Ezra’s eyes on him, watching, remembers the feel of the man’s skin against his palm. He bites back a groan of pleasure when he eases his waistband over his cock and takes himself out, allowing his grip to tighten and find a familiar, easy rhythm. He can’t get the younger man’s voice out of his head, that low, rumbling baritone, so oddly soothing.
He presses his face into the pillow to muffle the sound when he comes.
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「 jensen ackles , forty - one , cis male + he/him 」 did you know 𝘋𝘌𝘈𝘕'𝘚 real name is 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐍 𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑 ?! around the island they seem to be quite loyal , but also short tempered , but it makes sense given they are a FIRE CHIEF and come from 𝐒𝐔𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐀𝐋 . you can hear 𝚁𝙰𝙼𝙱𝙻𝙴 𝙾𝙽 by 𝙻𝙴𝙳 𝚉𝙴𝙿𝙿𝙴𝙻𝙸𝙽 blasting from their house , but be careful ! they can be agitated as nightmares bring back memories of JACK DEFEATING CHUCK . even so , it’s impossible to see 𝒇𝒓𝒆𝒄𝒌𝒍𝒆𝒔 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒚 𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒔 𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒔 𝒔𝒌𝒊𝒏, 𝒄𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒈𝒍𝒂𝒔𝒔 𝒃𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒅𝒚 𝒌𝒏𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒍𝒆𝒔, 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒐𝒂𝒓 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒍𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒑𝒖𝒓𝒓 𝒐𝒇 𝒂𝒏 𝒆𝒏𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒆, 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒍𝒖𝒆 𝒋𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒇𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒍 𝒕𝒐𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒔 𝒂 𝒃𝒆𝒅 and not think about them .
hey i’m link , i’m 24 , & i never learned how to fucking read . VERY excited to be here again . i work a lot but i’ll be on as often as i can . beyond that i hope you all enjoy the mess of characters i have / plan to have here ! such as dean here ! feel free to message me on here or on discord at ANY time i do not bite & get excited very easily !
full name : dean henry winchester . alises : the righteous man . the sword of michael . squirrel . age : forty one . gender & pronouns : cis male , he / him . sexual & romantic orientation : bisexual / biromantic . species : human . identifying marks : multiple scars across his body . some looking like they came from knives , others from guns . his memory on how he got them is fuzzy .
𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐇𝐀𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐒𝐎 𝐅𝐀𝐑 ?
there was still a fire at the winchester house when dean was four years old . an accident this time . an electrical fire . a normal tragedy . their mom was still lost but dean , holding onto the bundle that was his little brother , watched as the fire fighters pulled his dad from the flames . sitting with them , brother in his arms , while they consoled him & let him wear their helmets would always be a far more comforting memory to dean than the ones his father gave him in the years to come . john winchester became distant . negligent . borderline abusive . dean did his best to take the bulk of what their grief drowned father put on them , trying to shield sam , & gave a lot of his life to helping raise sam where john fell short .
when he was a late teen if he wasn’t at home or sneaking out for a smoke & some girls , dean worked at being a volunteer firefighter . it was something , he thought , slightly productive to do with his life as it was already obvious to him that he wouldn’t be able to go to college with sam still needing him around . at age eighteen , with his high school diploma stating he graduated with average grades , dean officially joined the fire force at an entry level & began saving up money for his own place . a place away from his father but close enough that sam could use it to get away at any time as well .
when dean was twenty the place ended up getting more cramped than expected . dean was notorious with women & thought himself as careful but clearly not as careful as he thought . when he found out he was going to be a dad he initially rejected the idea , wanting nothing to do with the child out of fear of turning into his father . sam was the one who talked him down from the anxiety . with his encouragement , dean slowly worked to learn how to be a parent . preparing a room . reading parenting books . anything . it came as a shock a month before the due date to when he found out the mother was backing out of keeping the child . she had been the one initially for raising it at first but suddenly felt she couldn’t do it . though he’d be on his own , dean had steeled himself to becoming a father too much to let the boy to go up for adoption . richard samuel winchester was born march 7th & dean took full custody as his sole guardian . he kept in touch with richie’s mother still , who went on to study psychology outside aurora .
being a single father was far from easy but dean managed , always taking help where he could from his brother or from friends . one friend even got closer than others . when richie was nearing two years old , dean started seeing ( REDACTED ) & the casual feeling of the affair wasn’t there for long . things blossomed into something serious & when it was discovered she was pregnant , this time dean was far more sure about things than when he was twenty . the wedding was small & around nine months later dean became a father of two as maxine joined the winchester family . or max , as was preferred .
for a few years this seemed the perfect arrangement . dean worked up through the ranks at the station , setting himself up to be the new fire chief one day , & raised his kids happily with his wife . but perfect sometimes doesn’t last long . their relationship , after all , had been a rushed one . after around eight years , things simply didn’t have the same spark as they used to . the divorce wasn’t nasty , they knew it was a mutual thing , but it still stung . he left the court as a single father again , now with joint custody of his daughter .
at fourty one , years later , he’s gotten well back on his feet . no serious relationships seem to stick but at work he’s finally gotten fire chief . he misses being in the middle of the action sometimes , but he loves his job nonetheless . if not at work he’s visiting his brother , the bar , fixing his car , or dedicating time to his kids .
𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐖𝐀 𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 ?
a blonde girl with a sickening grin . ( but he can see beyond that . she’s gruesome . horrific . a monster made only for the worst nightmares with two pure white eyes ) she reaches for the door & her voice is as sickly sweet as a child’s . sic ‘em , boy . what’s behind the door rivals her for terror . a black beast of a dog . red eyes & snarling teeth . blood staining its muzzle & paws . one breath blows away the protective herbs . & then dean is helpless as it rips into him . his leg first . his arm . his side . though the worst of it all is hearing sam’s begging for it to stop . but it won’t . it can’t . & WHO’S FAULT IS THAT , DEAN WINCHESTER ? dean wakes up when the dog rips his chest to ribbons , clawing into his heart . his hand goes to his chest --- there’s nothing there .
after fitfully falling back asleep , his mind plays the aftermath . it’s dark & he can feel pain . pain in his shoulder . in his side . in his head . it’s ripping him , pulling him . two hooks in his torso & chains around each wrist & ankle suspend him from nothing in an endless thunder cloud . the only time he can see is when lightening flashes . there’s blood coming over his lip . it’s pain like he’s never felt before . it’s fear like he’s never felt before . SOMEBODY HELP ME ! a desperate call . SAM ! when he wakes up in cold sweat this time , he doesn’t go back to sleep .
( one nightmare in two parts . dean had dreams of the end of season 3 where he is dragged to hell . both of the dragging & of his first moments in hell as well . )
𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐅𝐄𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐄𝐖 𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 ?
he tries not to think of them . tries to believe they’re just dreams because the alternative is so much worse to consider . at the same time , though , as he starts to see the things that go bump in the night as more real , he feels the urge to go to his roots if only to protect the family he has here . a fake life or not , those he knows in aurora are still real enough to him .
𝐀𝐍𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐄𝐋𝐒𝐄 ?
father to RICHIE & MAX . he will absolutely go off on you if you are mean to his kids . yes , this includes other kids who bully his kids . he doesn’t care he’ll yell at you for being an asshole no matter your age . absolutely no one messes with his kids .
still has the impala here . can’t have dean without his car .
while he is the fire chief , fixing cars is a huge hobby of his . if he didn’t love his job , he would absolutely leave it to work as a mechanic at the local garage .
while he mostly works on his car himself , he still brings his car to the garage a few times a year for things that his own garage doesn’t have the tools for . they know him there from his recognizable car .
his father has been alive for sometime but he’s recently found out he died from a stroke in his sleep . dean is stuck between the duty of giving his father a proper funeral & his own bitterness at the man for how he treated him & sam . this is only worsened by the memories of john that will come back .
he is bisexual ! because i’ve watched this show & have eyes ! i know ! is he repressed a lot & hasn’t exactly had an offical coming out ? also yes ! doesn’t mean he HASN’T made out & gotten with a guy or two in the past . just means he never felt like he could say anything about it all growing up & now just figures it’s too late .
uuuuuuuuuuuuh anyway . i’ll add to this more if i think of more .
𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 .
SAM WINCHESTER - younger brother . simultaneously a pain in his ass & his best friend . practically raised sam but is still his brother at the end of the day . they annoy each other & love each other . very happy his kids have such a cool uncle .
RICHIE TOZIER WINCHESTER - son . absolutely is dean’s “little weirdo” & dean will say that in the most affectionate way possible . he’s always trying encourage rich & that means enduring richie’s terrible impressions then pretending they were incredible . he has , in dean’s opinion , improved with that . his jokes genuinely make dean laugh . he thinks richie is hilarious .
MAXINE “ MAX ” MAYFIELD WINCHESTER - daughter . he would do anything for max , literally she has him tied around her finger . if the principle called that she got into a fight he immediately asked if she won . but , once back home , he’d try to be responsible & tell them that fights maybe aren’t the best idea . will listen to taylor swift for them . secretly enjoys it .
EDDIE KASPBRAK - son figure . absolutely will look out for eddie as if he were his own kid . however , the boy’s mother was someone he got into shouting matches often with which probably didn’t bode well for the future of eddie & richie’s friendship . in dean’s opinion , though , the kid needs a lot more living . even if richie & eddie had a falling out , dean would still be there for the kid if he asked .
ASH WILLIAMS - close friend . they initially met when dean was around eighteen in a bar that he had used a fake ID to get into . though they ended up on opposite ends of the bar fight that broke out , they later ended up buddying up in jail while waiting for bail . since then , the two have remained quite the chaotic duo .
SIRIUS BLACK - acquaintance . works at the garage & dean trusts him with the impala . sometimes sirius stares at him for a bit too long but dean doesn’t question it .
JYN ERSO - acquaintance . also works at the garage ! lets dean borrow tools sometimes & he appreciates that a lot .
𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 .
EX - WIFE - someone to be max’s mother . can be around 39 - 43 . marriage was ended mutually & they’re on good terms now . has joint custody .
#dean: intro#sorry this is a NOVEL#ill make a nice graphic for it later#when my laptop isnt busted#❝ 𝑫𝐄𝐀𝐍 ( about ) .#tw abuse#tw death
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