#this really shouldn't have taken me so long to draw

[xiaowhore]

hydro dragon, hydro dragon, don't cry!

premise. in which you manage to make neuvillette feel better at the expense of your dignity. (a fair trade, really.)

word count. 1.5k

note. do umbrellas exist at teyvat. i really don't know.

You've never taken Monsieur Neuvillette as the type to dramatically brood in the rain when he gets sad, but to be fair, you don't know much about him at all.

You clutch onto your umbrella, contemplating. So, uh... Are you supposed to approach him now? Shield him from the rain with your umbrella? That doesn't sound too bad, actually. But then what? Ask him if his pet fish died and now he's mourning his loss? That's hardly appropriate to say to the Chief of Justice... But it would be creepier to just stand there without saying anything, right?

You could leave and pretend you didn't see anything. Of course, that's an option too. It's possible he prefers to be left alone when he's unhappy.

But sulking while standing in the rain just gives “I want someone's attention” vibes, doesn't it?!

With a fit of reckless courage and a “fuck it” mindset, you advance your way forward to where he stands.

Regretting something as soon as you do it is on-brand for you, you realize as you soon come to learn you have to be on the tip of your toes to have the umbrella barely raising over his head instead of hanging from him. You must make a pathetic sight, attempting to shield both yourself and this hulking tower of a man from the rain with a tiny umbrella.

“...What are you doing?” Neuvillette turns around, taken aback when you're in much closer proximity than he expected. Panic flares in his eyes, and like the gentleman that he is, he steps back to create some distance. His head presses against the edge of the umbrella.

“Hey, you shouldn't move away!” You follow his movements, closing the gap. His head is now safely within the umbrella's reach, but you're an inch away from being pressed up against his chest. “I miscalculated. This thing's too small for us.”

When the initial shock wears off, his shoulders slump, a sign of him lowering his guard. “If you know that much, you should use it for yourself and go home.”

That doesn't sound like a bad idea. Appealing, even. You've never felt so silly in your entire life and the option to run away is looking more enticing with each second that ticks by.

Still.

“It's dangerous to walk alone at this hour. Won't you accompany me, sir?”

...Not the best excuse you could've come up with, but your mouth runs faster than your brain. Neuvillette, being the considerate person he is, actually takes some time to think about it, and you hurry to say, “If you leave me alone now, you could have another disappearance case in your hands tomorrow. Would you really like more work on your desk rather than some company tonight?”

He gives you a long, suffering stare that looks suspiciously like the one he gives to Lady Furina when she disappoints him, but he doesn't say no. His hand wraps around the umbrella handle, overlapping with your fingers. It takes another two seconds of that stare before you get the message and you let go, finally able to rest the balls of your feet on the ground as you stand on normal footing.

“I hope you don't make a hobby of coercion,” he hums as you walk together, your shoulders brushing every so often. “Or else I'd see you as a criminal suspect tomorrow instead of a victim.”

“I see that jokes aren't your strong suit, Monsieur Neuvillette.” You laugh awkwardly, your nervousness spiking to an all-time high throughout your entire interaction with him. It's been barely ten minutes.

Silence ensues.

“Do you like showers, sir?”

You should've just kept your mouth shut, damn it.

“I like them the same amount as the average person, I suppose.” The ridiculous question doesn't phase him, and you don't know how he's able to keep a straight face while saying that.

You decide to push your luck. “...Do you prefer bathing with cold or hot water?”

Finally, you draw out a light chuckle from him, the sound deep and pleased. It almost makes playing the fool worth it. “I've been told I'm not the best with small talk, but you seem to be worse than I am.”

Your head snaps up to look at him, affronted. “It wasn't a bad question!”

“Certainly not as bad as talking about the weather. Do you want me to praise you?”

Was the Chief Justice always this sassy? “You're making fun of me,” you point out the obvious, turning away and crossing your arms. “I asked about showers because you were standing in the rain.”

“You thought I liked showers because I was in the rain?”

“Well, I didn't know for sure. That's why I asked.” Even you can tell you're sounding more and more ridiculous by the minute. Was your house always this far? You can't wait to dive to your bed and pretend this encounter never happened. “I think I'll just shut up now.”

“Really, now?”

“Every time I open my mouth around you, I embarrass myself further. I think it's for the best.”

You hear another chuckle as heat crawls up to your cheeks, spreading to your ears. “For what it's worth, you did put me out of my terrible mood. You're quite funny.”

“That's a nice way to say you think I'm being strange.” You hide your face with your hands, peeking at Neuvillette's expression between your fingers. Bathed in the silvery moonlight, he looks straight out of a painting, even with wet hair and drenched clothes.

You've never seen him up close, never even dreamed of standing next to him. Now, you're exchanging jabs at each other like it's the most normal thing in the world, like you weren't just thinking he was someone out of reach when you watched his court trial in amazement. Now, he's so close that you can almost feel the heat from his body, so much more tangible than just a figure you admired from afar.

“But I do have your strangeness to thank,” he admits, looking off into the distance. The stars shine bright in his eyes. “Had it not been for you squeezing me under your umbrella and forcing me to walk you home, I'd surely still be under the rain.”

“...Couldn't you have phrased that better?”

“In court, I only state facts.”

You laugh dryly. “You could spare me some dignity by embellishing the story a bit... Oh, we're here.” You were so occupied defending yourself from his witty comments that you didn't realize you had already arrived home until your door was right at your face. You glance at Neuvillette, who then nods towards the door. If he's disappointed to have the stroll cut short, he doesn't show it.

“Go in. It is rather late.” He closes the umbrella and offers it back to you, a gentle smile on his face. The sight is almost like a reward for your efforts; the small upturn of the corners of his lips makes all the difference, his sharp, cold gaze softening into something more affectionate. The rainbow after the storm. The gratitude for a small kindness.

“You have to get home, too,” you utter, pushing it back to him.

“The rain stopped a few minutes ago,” he insists, gesturing behind him. You blink owlishly, observing the still pools of rainwater. You didn't even notice. Why didn't he say so? You didn't have to squeeze together under such a tiny umbrella, then.

“You should still keep it.”

He raises an eyebrow, inquisitive. “Why?”

You unlock your door, stepping inside, but still not closing it shut. “Well, it gives you an incentive to see me again.” You grin at him mischievously, like you thought of a genius plan. “I work at the cafe in the main street. I'm sure we have some tea that will strike your fancy. Make sure you're not moping next time we meet, yeah?”

Not for the first time, he seems taken aback. But his gaze softens once more, his expression molding into something pleased. “Very well.”

And so, he leaves with a small umbrella in his hand, a smile on his lips, and the clear skies over his head.

The next time you see Neuvillette, the sun is high in the sky. Compared to that night, you can see him a little better now.

That's how you notice he looks unusually shy with a bouquet of flowers in his arms and a pink blush high on his cheeks. “...Good afternoon,” he starts, his lips curving to a beginning of a smile. “The weather is great today, isn't it?”

You stare. You stare some more. And when the sight finally processes in your mind, your twinkling laughter rings in the air, as sweet as the aroma of freshly baked muffins. “And who stooped so low to talk about the weather this time, huh?”

Neuvillette can't even pretend to feel bad about it, not when you're jumping off the seat in the counter to show him a table for two. “Your silliness is infectious, it seems.”

“Hey!”

(You've never taken Monsieur Neuvillette as the type to be smart-mouthed, the type to be indulgent to your whims, the type to be romantic towards the person he's interested in—

But now you have all the time in the world to get to know him better.)

[rogueddie]

It takes Steve an embarassingly long moment to realise that the spray isn't doing anything. He tries shaking it… nothing. He even checks by spraying it on his hand, shaking it again. Nothing.

He tries listening as he shakes it again and, though he's sure there's some product still left inside, nothing will come out.

He reluctantly throws it in the little trash can, just next to the toilet door. He doesn't bother rooting through the draws or cabinets either; he'd used the last of his emergency powder kit yesterday. There's nothing left.

He huffs, folding his arms, glaring at his reflection. Specifically at the very overgrown, bright blond roots of his hair.

It brings up the same anxiety he's been having for the past month. It's taken him a long time to save up for his usual hairdressers. He hadn't thought it would take so long but, with the kids and now Robin and Eddie, it shouldn't be that surprising.

Robin often pays a good chunk for things too, often paying him gas money, but it's usually him paying for everything. And now that he's paying rent in his own little appartment? He's not often left with that much at the end of the month.

He's starting to think it's not worth the trip. But he isn't going to start using box dye or anything cheap. He's spent a long time taking care of his hair, spent just as long struggling to find the right products too.

He doesn't even care that the kids and Robin mock him for it, he has great hair and, screw it, he's proud. He's not going to damage it by getting bad hair dye.

He's already booked his next hairdresser appointment for the next day, already saved up gas money too. He might as well ask for bleach instead, go back to his natural color and save himself from anymore days with overgrown roots.

He almost regrets the idea when he gets to work.

"Holy shit, you're a natural blond?" Robins grin looks almost painful with how wide it is. She's a little too excited for his comfort. "I don't know how I didn't guess before. This explains so much. How have you kept this hidden for so long? It's so light!"

"Don't you have work to do?" He bats her hand away when she, again, reaches for his hair.

"Not anymore. Why do you dye it? How did it grow out so much? When did you start hiding it? Did someone pressure you into it? They didn't make fun of you, did they? Because I will hunt them down and-"

"No one made me dye it or bullied me into it," he huffs. He can feel his attempt at a cool demeaner soften with how quickly she jumps to his defense. "I just... I never liked it. I don't think it suits me. Brunettes are cute."

"Are you dyeing it again?"

"Probably not. The hairdresser I go to isn't exactly cheap."

"You can get box dye at-"

"I'm not using box dye."

"It's not that bad, and if you really hate the blond-"

Steve swats at her when she reaches for his hair again. With a heavy sigh, he braces himself for the shift full of questions and jokes of 'betrayal'.

Like he suspected, they don't get much work done.

When Eddie comes in, towards the end of their shift, Steve is almost relieved.

"Stop bullying him without me," Eddie complains.

"Thank you," Steve says, whilst Robin boos. "What is it tonight? Movie night with Wayne or some of the kids?"

But Eddie is frozen, staring at his hair.

"I think he's broken," Robin says after a pause.

"You're blond?" Eddie blinks. "When did you go blond?"

"Always have been," Steve shrugs. "Just... not dyeing it anymore."

"Oh."

Steve and Robin stare at him. They share a glance after a moment.

"You here for a movie?" Steve asks.

"What? Me? No, I- just stopping by. And you're... yeah. I'm gonna- I've got to go. Wayne is waiting and... you know. Bye."

He turns around and practically runs out the store. His wheels squeal a little as he drives out, most likely breaking the speed limit.

"Did he just..." Robin starts, trailing off with a frown.

"Unbelievable," Steve shakes his head. "Just when I give up, he realizes that he likes me too! What the hell, Bob. Is he only into blonds or something?"

[hypewinter]

There he was, across the room and blissfully unaware. Good. Danny's hand curled around the mini blaster. It had taken him a while to compact all the components but now he was ready. He would finally make Vlad pay for taking away everything from him.

He stalked across the room carefully. He had to make this shot count. If he missed or the older halfa noticed him in any way, he wouldn't be able to get off another. That's why Danny was going no ghost powers. He couldn't risk the old man sensing him.

Danny was so close now. Just a few more steps. His fingers found the trigger. He began to raise his arm.

"You don't have to do this," someone whispered in his ear, catching his arm.

Danny attempted to wrench his arm out of the stranger's grip without drawing attention. "Let go," he hissed.

Instead the grip tightened. "Whatever that man has done to warrant this, I'm sure we can deal with another way."

Danny almost scoffed at that. What did this person know? Absolutely nothing. There was no other way to resolve this. What legal channel would believe him? That the man in front of him was a half ghost that had killed his friends and family in an explosion to trigger his dark side? He was likely to be locked up in a mental institution.

The young halfa could still smell the smoke in the air. If he closed his eyes for too long he would see the flames. The echoes of gloating mixed with cackling still rung in his ears. No, there was no other way.

Danny applied a bit of ghost strength and ripped away from the stranger only for a hand to now fall firmly on his shoulder. "Please, don't do this. Don't throw your life away," the same voice begged.

Danny finally whipped around to confront the one stopping him. He came face to face with blue eyes filled with concern and surrounded by a mop of black hair. "I don't have a life. Now let. Go," he gritted out.

But the stranger didn't. He even went as far as gripping Danny's other shoulder as well. "Believe me. I've been where you are," he said. "There's another path to take."

Anger boiled in Danny. He had taken the other path damnit! He had done everything in his power to go down a different road and life had just forced him right down the original one anyway. This was the only way. A way to prevent the future and make sure Vlad could never harm anyone again.

Danny applied more ghost strength, once away prying himself from the stranger's hands. He turned, resolved in his actions, only to make eye contact with Vlad. No. No no no. He quickly raised the blaster and shot at him but it was too late. The older halfa grinned devilishly as he easily dodged the blast.

Panic immediately spread and the crowd whipped into a frenzy but Danny didn't care. He aimed again but Vlad was quicker. He snaked his way towards the boy and knocked the blaster out of his hand.

"Ah Daniel," he said. "And here I was beginning to think I'd have to hunt you down myself."

Danny curled up a fist and swung at Vlad only for the man to easily catch it. "Come now Daniel. That isn't really the best you can do now is it?"

"No," Danny growled. "This is!"

With his cover now blown and nothing left to lose, Danny shot an Ecto blast from his free fist right into Vlad's chest. The man staggered back and sneered.

"You shouldn't have done that," he hissed.

"And you shouldn't have killed my family!" Danny yelled as he let his transformation wash over him. He would not let this man get away again. Even if it meant sealing his fate with the Bats. Even if it meant death.

[yamujiburo]

I'm so thankful for you sharing the importance of protecting minors from sexual content. My parents and I didn't have much knowledge back then and I was exposed to this kind of stuff too early. I developed bad habits. I somehow deceived my family into trusting me way too much and, when I saw I had lost control and I asked for help, I saw my family was also hurt and they spent a lot on therapy and my anxiety medication. I have forgiven them for not knowing back them. But I still haven't forgiven myself for getting them through all that stuff. It's important to understand how much we need to protect minors from sexual content. Family members and artists, please pay attention to the content young audience is exposed to.

Of course! I can relate a lot to this. My parents were really good at monitoring what I was doing online for a while but they started trusting me more and I unfortunately started seeing a lot of stuff I shouldn't have but would keep it secret. Gonna talk about my experience a lil bit under the cut just bc I've been reflecting on it a lot recently (tw for grooming)

I gained a following of around 25K on deviantart by the time I was around 15/16. It was in the worst fandom too (mlp). I'd have a lot of much older men talking to me, drawing/writing nsfw of my characters who were underaged (they'd draw nsfw of myself and my sonas as well). It was so normalized for me and I didn't see anything wrong with it at the time.

I'd shipped Spike and Rarity at the time (very much do not anymore) and adult men would use that ship as a basis for trying to talk to me or get in a relationship. "We're just like Sparity! You're young but you're very mature for your age, so it's fine." I remember one guy trying REALLY hard to try and get me to move in with him. I was pretty creeped out then, but like holy shit that's SUPER creepy and I'm fortunate that he didn't keep trying after I gave him a hard "no".

It bled into my real life a bit when I met a 22 y/o man who asked me out when I was just 16 just turning 17. Luckily the relationship was NOT long lasting (I think he realized that I'm a very boring person LMAO) but I think about how I thought that that was a perfectly normal. I'd date go on to date people who were probably too old for me.

Also around when I was 16/17, people started shipping me with another artist in the fandom who was several years older than I was (side note: nothing wrong with an age gap! but it's very not okay when there's "waiting" for someone to be of legal age involved). I did end up dating said artist after I turned 18 and it was fine, I wasn't hurt or anything but I did find weird that we were shipped when I was still a teenager looking back (there was also nsfw drawn of us together before/when we were dating)

I just had such a warped sense of reality for a long because of this shit. I'm glad there's more conversations about this stuff and it's more known that adults should have little to no personal interaction with kids on the internet and vice versa. There's way too many stories of kids getting taken advantage of in fandom spaces. I think I got off fairly lucky all things considered. But bottom line YES kids need to be protected online and their exposure to sexual content/adult spaces should be limited or monitored. It's also really tough though because not all kids have adults in their real life that they can trust or go to to ask questions about sex so they seek solace in adults online and it's just a constant cycle.

I'm honestly unsure of what to do about that and I don't have all the answers but I ultimately just don't want kids online to end up in similar positions I was in when I was younger. I just do my best

[mylordshesacactus]

The Barrissoka Fusion You Never Knew You Wanted

So in celebration of FINALLY rounding out the originally-planned slate of barrissoka Disney AU/fusion challenge fics, I thought I'd put together a masterlist for those of you who are new, returning, or just never got around to them when they were first posted!

By sheer good luck, there are an even split of AU types--three fusions (ie, Star Wars characters adapted to a non-GFFA setting), and three alternate timelines (where the core setting is the same, but events developed differently--in this case, in a way analogous to the core plot of the movie the challenge was based on.).

Fusions

Through The Darkness And The Shadows

Setting: Fantasy-Medieval AU: Beauty and the Beast

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, a young princess lived in a shining castle…

It'll Sound Like A Promise

Setting: Fantasy-Medieval (Scotland Redux) AU: Brave

A clan leader’s heir had to strive for perfection. That was why Ahsoka was currently hiding in a tree.

Look To The Sky With Hope

Setting: Pirates/Fantasy Age of Sail AU: Pirates of the Caribbean (62k, 5 chapters)

Anakin Skywalker. Every sailor knows that name. Captain of the ghost ship Twilight, ferryman of the dead. Some say he preys on merchantmen, out of vengeance for the loss of his ship and crew; others that he and the charred black phantom are an honest sailor's friend, a protector in the dark and the mist. According to Ahsoka, the truth is both and neither. But the Twilight is...well, it's not real. Barriss Offee may be new to this whole pirate thing, but she knows that. It's a legend, a story, a sailor's superstition; like mermaids and Fridays and the Kraken. The ship of the dead and its captain, they're just a myth. Aren't they?

Alternate Universes

Going My Way?

AU: Aristocats Podfic: By Writers_Block, available here.

Shipwrecked and stranded on a remote agricultural planet, Barriss Offee doesn't dare reveal her identity as a Jedi for fear of drawing unwanted attention that might endanger the younglings in her care. Enter the charming, compassionate young spacer Ashla, who drops everything to take the group under her protection and asks nothing in return, as Barriss grows more and more unhappy with the necessity of lying to a young woman who's been nothing but honest with them. Meanwhile, Ahsoka Tano and her master are on an undercover mission. She really wishes she could tell the scared young mother she's taken in that she's a Jedi, but, well. The mission has to come first.

Back To The Wind

AU: Cars. (I cannot emphasize enough that this is an AU and not a fusion. They are not cars. They are people. For the love of god. It's just a plot adaptation. Please stop asking me if they're supposed to be cars.)

A hyperdrive malfunction strands Ahsoka in a nearly-abandoned trading settlement in the Outer Rim. That's not the problem. While she works off her community service sentence, she ends up in the unofficial custody of a weirdly hostile Mirialan who won't stop giving her these long, searching looks and talking about the failures of the Jedi Order like she knows something Ahsoka doesn't. That's not the problem either. The problem is...Ahsoka's starting to wonder if she really wants to go back.

When These Moments Have Passed

AU: The Fox and the Hound

Jedi Master Plo Koon was sent to Shili to retrieve a Force-sensitive youngling...and arrived just a few hours too late. Years later, a Jedi padawan and an indentured bounty hunter find themselves in the same spaceport. They shouldn't be friends, not really, but...they're more alike than they are different, straining under the weight of roles they can't escape. That bond is stronger than the galaxy's expectations. Until it isn't.

Bonus

While these are NOT part of the very specific "I can turn any classic Disney movie into a barrissoka AU, fucking try me" original challenge that spawned all this, they're some very nice AUs and if you're into AUs in general, you'll probably appreciate:

Iced Offee, Caramel Twist

AU: Coffeeshop AU

(What? Someone had to write it.)

Mirror, Mirror

AU: Sith AU

(Series/Duology)

[heli-writes]

Seven summers, part 5.

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x female!reader

Summary: Every summer, Draco and y/n meet. First, by pure coincidence, then intentionally. Unbeknown to Draco, y/n's a muggle who has no clue he's a wizard. With the rise of the dark lord, how long can this go well?

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

Series Masterlist

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Fifth summer, August.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Dear Draco,

I hope you're well. I am writing you this letter because I think we should talk about what happened last month.

I'm sorry I deceived you. I never meant to lie to you. At some point, I just didn't know how to say it. I wanted to tell you this summer, I swear! Then we kissed and everything was so different than expected. I just didn't have the courage to...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Dear Draco,

I know you're angry and you have every right to be. Please believe me when I say I didn't mean to betray you. Actually, until our third summer, I didn't know you were a wizard. I just thought it was a culture thing. Then, after you told me how you feel about muggles, I was afraid to tell you. I thought you'd hate me too. Please, don't hate me. I don't know what...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Draco,

Please, give me one chance to explain myself. You've left without hearing my side. Hear me out and I promise...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Draco,

I'm sorry.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Frustrated, y/n throws her pen onto her desk. There are dozens of crumpled papers around her. In the last two hours, she started the same letter to Draco over and over again but so far, she hasn't found the right words to say. Not that it really matters. Without Draco's owl which regularly visited her for the past two years, she doesn't have a way to contact him. Apparently, wizards don't have a phone. Y/N takes out the trashcan from beneath her desk and swipes all the papers into it in one big swoop. Afterward, she groans and falls onto her bed face down. There's nothing to do in her room but to brood on the whole Draco situation. Supposedly, it is not necessary to mention that she's stuck in her room for two more weeks. After the night her parents had to pick her up at a train station in the middle of the night, of course, her parents asked questions. Questions that y/n couldn't answer without getting entangled in more and more lies. It all blew up in her face when her parents called Olivia's parents. After that, y/n had no other option but to tell them about the boy she's been seeing for a while. A long talk about sex trafficking and teenage pregnancy later, y/n got grounded for three weeks. I suppose I can be lucky I didn't get grounded for the entire summer holidays, she thinks to herself as she turns around to look for her phone only to realize that that's been taken away from her too. Suddenly, she's glad for the communication via owl. At least this way, her parents will find no messages that would incriminate her further. Y/n burries her face in a pillow and lets out a muffled scream.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

One week later

Y/n,

Don't think I am writing this because I have any concern for your muggle self. I don't care if you got home safely or not. Considering I got no news about a dead muggle girl in Salisbury, I suppose you live.

Honestly, I am just writing you this to draw a line under whatever it was that we did the last two years. I suppose even someone like you understands that a wizard like me cannot be associated with a muggle. It's absolutely absurd that I didn't notice it.

Just to make it absolutely clear: Don't tell anybody about me or the wizarding community or I can assure you the ministry will take care of you. Also, we're done.

D.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Puzzled, y/n blinks at the paper in front of her and then blinks at the owl that is sitting on her windowsill. Why on earth would he feel the need to write a letter like that, she questions herself. Obviously, she shouldn't tell anybody about wizards and after Draco's glorious exit at the inn, it should have been clear that they've broken up. Suddenly, she feels a hot pit of anger swelling in her stomach.

How dare he write a message like that, y/n thinks. Not a word from him for two weeks and then he sends me a threat and a break-up notice?, she fumes. She's not sure why he would risk getting caught writing to a muggle girl in the first place. Draw a line my ass, she thinks and rips up the letter into tiny little pieces. She watches the pieces float silently to her floor. Then, she pushes down her window with a loud bang, and glares at the owl for a few seconds, before turning away and continuing a half-finished jigsaw puzzle.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A few days later

Y/n,

Since the cover of the wizarding world hasn't been and there are no reports about a crazy woman talking about magic, I guess you didn't tell anybody about us. Good.

You know it really astonishes me how you managed to keep up the facade for so long. I never knew muggles could be this... adaptable. However, I think it was quite a malicious pretense of you. It makes me wonder if anything that you said or did was true. Not that it would matter to me.

Remember to keep quiet. I really can't have a muggle running around blabbering about wizard secrets.

D.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Y/n feels like she could spit fire. She lets out an angered scream and crumples up the letter. What a dick, y/n screams internally. I get he's angry at me, I get he doesn't want to so me anymore but what on earth is he trying to achieve with these letters?, y/n asks herself. She tries to shoosh Draco's owl away from her window. The owl lifts itself into the air and settles on a branch of the apple tree in y/n's garden. Y/n stares at the owl and the owl stares back. She turns away and throws Draco's letter into the trash bin. The anger made her feel too hot. Pulling her pullover over her head, she stumbles towards her closet and puts on a t-shirt. Meanwhile, she calls Draco all kinds of nasty names in her head. She no longer feels sorry. When she turns around, the owl sits at her windowsill again. Y/n rolls up a magazine and pokes the owl in the hope that it will take flight. The owl looks at her absolutely unbothered. Y/n pushes a bit harder and forces the owl towards the edge of the windowsill. Eventually, the owl gives up and glides to the apple tree again. "Go awaaaaay!!!", y/n yells out of her window and pulls her widow shut with a loud bang.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Another letter arrived a few days after that. It has a similar tone as the last two with an equal amount of insults towards muggle. Y/n is absolutely fuming. Draco's owl doesn't even bother leaving y/n's windowsill and already made itself comfortable. Y/n glares intently at the owl through her closed window. Finally, she pulls out a sheet of paper and a pen.

Draco,

I get it. I'm a stupid muggle and I shouldn't tell anybody about magic. I get it. You can stop sending letters now. You said we're done so I don't understand why you keep contacting me.

Don't get me wrong - I understand you're angry. I deceived you and breaking up with me is probably the right thing to do. I'm sorry I lied to you but I feel like you don't see why I acted this way. It's not like I knew that you were a wizard when we first met and when I got to know you, you started insulting people like me. What was I supposed to do? Have you ever considered that this world you live in intimidates me? Have you ever considered that maybe I was scared of losing what we had? Because I genuinely cared? I guess not.

Anyways, what's done is done. No need to dwell on it. Maybe it would do you good if you let go. It's time to get back to normal, don't you think?

Y/n.

Contently, y/n reads through her letter again. After folding it in two, she opens the window and holds it out towards the owl. The owl takes the letter without hesitation and takes off. Y/n watches the bird disappear into the grey clouds that hang low in the sky. Eventually, she closes the window and feels calmer than she has since the night at Stonehenge.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Y/n doesn't see any owl around her window for a little over the week. She's not grounded anymore for a couple of days. She spent the days in freedom by accompanying her mother to the dentist, to the supermarket, and to her auntie Paula. In short: her parents are still keeping her on a short leash. However, today she's allowed to meet a friend. Even if it's just to apologize. She's meeting Olivia in town. Olivia and her already texted after y/n got her phone back. So Olivia knows the gist and luckily she's not angry. Actually, being the teenage girl she is, Olivia is very excited to hear all about the mysterious guy y/n got herself in trouble for. It's the least thing y/n wants to talk about but it's only fair she owes Olivia some kind of explanation.

Y/n is getting ready in her room. Her mother already called her down several minutes ago. Obviously, she isn't allowed to take the bus by herself. Rummaging through her make-up bag y/n is trying to find a lip balm for her purse when she suddenly hears a soft clank on the window. By now, y/n knows the sound all too well. The sound of a beak on glass. She shoots around and is face to face with Draco's owl. For a moment, y/n contemplates not opening the window and leaving the owl where it is. At some point, it must get hungry and fly off again, right? However, curiosity killed the cat and y/n is pretty sure Draco will be the death of her. So she quickly opens the window, rips the letter out of the owl's beak and stuffs the letter into her bag. Her mother is already calling for her again and without looking back, y/n takes off.

"We pick you up exactly at 4 pm and the café, understand y/n?", her mother lectures her. "I expect you both to be there. I want to apologize to Olivia's parents in person.", she tells y/n. Y/n groans and pulls her hood over her face. "Didn't you already apologize on the phone? Can't we finally leave this behind? Obviously, I learned my lesson.", y/n begs. Her mother gives her a sharp look in the rear-view mirror of their car. "That's not of you to decide. You will have to earn our trust back.", her mother points out. Y/n knows her mother is right, but it still feels unfair. It was a horrible experience inside and out and y/n wants nothing more than to just forget about it. Her mother turns her attention back to the road. Y/n crosses her arms in front of her chest. Suddenly, she remembers the letter again. It's still sitting in her bag unopened. Carefully, she takes it out. She holds it low, close to her lap, so her mother wouldn't see.

Y/n,

Meet me today at Trafalgar Square. 3 pm sharp.

D.

Y/n stares at the message in disbelief. Is he joking? Is this some kind of setup? So that they can grab her and make her disappear or whatever wizards do to normal people who accidentally get to know about magic? Yeah, no, I'm absolutely not going., y/n thinks. Somehow she wishes Draco had a phone so that she could react to this message with a couple of middle finger emojis. She crumples up the paper and stuffs it back into her back.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Olivia's already waiting when her mother drops her off. She even gets out of the car to exchange some words with Olivia and to make sure her parents are really picking her up. Y/n can feel her cheeks heat up with embarrassment. However, Olivia takes it cool. She answers y/n's mother's question politely and acts as if absolutely nothing out of the ordinary happened since the last time she's seen her.

This attitude drops really fast once y/n's mom is back in the car and out of sight. Olivia turns around, makes a squeaking sound, and says: "You need to tell me everything!". Apparently, y/n must've had a really dumb look on her face. "C'mon, y/n! My parents told me all about your lie.", Olivia grins. Once they've settled in a quiet niche at the café, Olivia looks at y/n expectantly. Y/n sighs. After all, she knew she had to talk about this. "Look, Olivia, I'm really sorry about all of this. I shouldn't have you involved in my lie. I-i was stupid and I really learned my-", y/n starts but Olivia immediately interrupts her. "Yes, yes! Save that speech for my parents. I get it, you lied. More importantly, you met a boy.", Olivia says and wiggles her eyebrows. "More like a massive jerk.", y/n deadpans. Olivia nods agreeingly. "And yet you lied so that you can spend a weekend with him all alone.", Olivia grins and gives her the look. Y/n sighs. "It's not like you think.", y/n tries to argue. "Riiiight... that's why you hid him from your parents.", Olivia says and crosses her arms. Y/n sighs and stirs her drink. "Well, fine, we've been together since Christmas and wanted to spend some time together in the summer.", she says defeatedly. "First of all, it's not. Second of all, since Christmas? Why am I only hearing now about it?", Olivia asks. Y/n shrugs. "It's not like I've been seeing him a lot since then. He goes to a boarding school and is only around in the summer and for Christmas.", she points out. Olivia thinks about this for a moment. "So, you've been just texting?", Olivia says unconvinced. "If that's your way of asking if we were screwing the answer is no. We've only been... uh, texting.", y/n says. Olivia crunches her eyebrows. "This is less juicy than expected. But did you kiss? And what about the weekend away? That sounds like a perfect opportunity to lose your v-card.", Olivia keeps asking. Y/n blushes. "V-card? Really? That's so lame, Olivia.". Olivia shrugs. "I'm not saying I'm supporting the patriarchal idea of virginity but the first time is special and exciting for everyone, isn't it?", she argues. Y/n shrugs. "I wouldn't know. Again, nothing happened. We only kissed.", she underlines her point. Suddenly, there's a glint in Olivia's eyes. "Ooohhh... you kissed? Was it good?", she asks teasingly. Y/n snips a small ball of paper at Olivia. "I mean, yes, but it doesn't matter. We broke up.", she says solemnly. "Clearly, otherwise your parents wouldn't had to pick you up at the station in the middle of the night.", Olivia points out, "What happened? You two had a fight?". Y/n shrugs. She feels her eyes burning. She thought she was over it. Really, she thought that Draco's stupid letters made her angry enough to forget how deeply the whole thing hurt her. "Yes. He expected me to be something I'm not. Took of when he noticed and left me behind.", y/n says. Olivia looks at her for a moment. "Let me guess. He wanted to screw you and when you didn't want to he dropped you? Man, guys suck.", Olivia takes a guess. Y/n shakes her head. "No, that wasn't it. He was actually super respectful. It was more like... a rich asshole finding out your common trash.", y/n lies. "Oof... he comes from old money? That kind of guy?", Olivia asks. Y/n nods. "Yup, that kind of guy.", she says. "Well good thing you didn't screw him. Those are the worst baby daddies.", Olivia nods as if she had any more experience with these things than y/n had. "Olivia, can you take this serious?", y/n says frustrated.

Olivia holds up her hands in defense. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You're right. ... So you didn't hear anything from him ever since?", she asks. Y/n puffs and puts her hair up in a messy loop. All this talk got her warm. "Oh, I heard from him, believe me.", she says angrily. "That doesn't sound good. What did he say?", Olivia asks. "Oh, he told me what a terrible person I am alongside some threats not to tell anybody.", she tells her. Olivia slurps a bit of her drink watching her intensely. "Ah, afraid about his reputation? So, he's an arrogant prick.", Olivia points out. Y/n nods. "Yeah, and look at what he sent me today.", y/n says and pulls out Draco's note. Olivia raises a brow and takes the piece of paper. "Old fashioned, I see.", Olivia mumbles and quickly reads through the note. "I really don't get it. He tells me he doesn't want to see me anymore and then he keeps sending me messages and now he wants to meet? Why on earth would I want to see him after everything? After he said these terrible things to me?", y/n rambles. Olivia gives her a side-eye and slides the paper back to her. "Well, isn't it obvious?", Olivia says matter-of-factly. "No.", y/n states bluntly. Olivia shrugs. "He's hooked. He doesn't want to mingle with a poor commoner, he's afraid about his reputation but he also can't let go.", Olivia explains. Y/n laughs into her face. "Sure, that's why he keeps lashing out at me.", she argues. Olivia shrugs. "Maybe he's not a good communicator and that's the only way he knows how to keep in touch with you. Or he's too proud to admit he likes you even though you don't have the same social status as him.", Olivia thinks out loud. Actually, she might be right, a voice in y/n's head says. Y/n shakes her head. "So?", Olivia asks. "So what?", y/n asks back. "Are you going to meet him?" Y/n looks at Olivia as if she's grown three heads. "Are you insane? Absolutely not!", she exclaims. Olivia shrugs. "You liked him enough to pull off this big-ass lie to get a weekend with him. And now you don't want to give him another chance?", Olivia questions her. Y/n kneads her hands. "I- it's... Look, he left me at a creepy in, in the middle of the night, in a town I don't know. Then he keeps pointing out what a low-life I am compared to him via text. Why would I want to see him again?", she exclaims. Olivia looks at her softly. "Because you have feelings for him? Clearly enough for his words to still hurt you. You guys could either reconcile or you can give him a piece of your mind.", Olivia argues. Y/n turns her head away like a frustrated toddler. "My mother would ground me forever.", she says. Olivia sighs. "Stop finding excuses to not face him. I'll stay here in case your mom shows up early. It's still early, you can catch the next bus.", Olivia says determinedly. Y/n looks at her blankly trying to come up with another reason to not go, but she draws a blank. "Don't look at me so stupidly, go!", Olivia ushers her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Y/n wraps her jacket around her. Even though it's summer and it's warm, she still feels cold. And nervous. And very uncomfortable. Olivia dragged her to the bus stop, shoved her into the bus, and before y/n could fathom what was happening, she was already standing on Trafalgar Square. She tries not to look around and search for him. She doesn't want to look desperate or give him the satisfaction of knowing she missed him, which she, of course, did not.

"Y/n", a familiar voice said behind her. Y/n turns around to Draco standing behind her. Suddenly all oxygen is knocked out of her lungs. She's not sure whether it's because she doesn't know what to say to him or because he is as good-looking as she remembers him. She wished her initial reaction to him would be repulsion, which would be an appropriate reaction she thinks. However, her heart takes a leap and she feels warm in places she shouldn't feel warm at all. Draco doesn't take his hands out of his pockets and y/n doesn't move her arms away from her chest. "You wanted to meet?", is all she can croak out. He nods without looking into her eyes. When he doesn't say anything. "Well, what do you have to say? Make it quick, I'm already in trouble.", she asks. Suddenly, but slowly, y/n can feel her anger returning in her chest. Draco's eyes snap to hers. "Don't you have anything to say?", he asks back. Y/n shrugs. "If you're looking for an apology, I've already given you one in writing.", she bites back. Draco frowns. "Really, that's all you've got to say to me?", he says bitterly. Y/n stares back at him irritated. "Well, what do you want me to say?", she asks.

Suddenly, Draco looks really helpless. "Well... I... you... I thought...", he tries looking for words. Y/n waits patiently. Let him struggle, she thinks. Draco stomps his foot on the ground angrily. "You lied to me!", he blurts out. Y/n huffs. "Firstly, I gave you an apology for that. Secondly, I never claimed to be a witch. You assumed it, which I didn't get at first, and then I just went with it.", she exclaims. Draco looks at her angrily. "Well, why would you go with it? I don't get it.", Draco argues. "Because I was thirteen years old, you just abducted me in a magical alleyway and then you go off about how awful people like me were. I was scared!", y/n blurts out a bit too loudly and Draco shushes her. "You telling me you were scared of me?", Draco hisses back quietly. Y/n lifts her hands above her hands frustratedly. "Yes! Of course! You grew up with magic, it's natural and everyday life for you! It's not for me. It scared me shitless because I suddenly didn't know what's real and possible anymore. Also, you literally told me your kind could wipe us out!", y/n whisper yells back at him. This stuns Draco for a moment. "I didn't say that.", he tells her. "Don't gaslight me, Draco. Yes, you gave me shit about muggleborns and muggles and then you told me wizards could literally wipe muggles off the face of earth.", y/n argues. Draco is quiet for a moment then points out: "If you are so scared of me, why did you continue to see me?". Y/n shrugs. "You're an arrogant prick, Draco, but you're also my first friend since I moved overseas.", she tells him. Draco is too stunned to speak. Y/n pushes her hands through her hair. "Look, I should've told you. Yes, at first I was scared and then... I don't know. You were my friend, Draco, I didn't want to lose that.", she sighs. Draco turns his head away. "That's what I am to you? A friend?", he mumbles. Y/n stares at him in disbelief. He's hooked, that's what Olivia said. Maybe she's right, y/n thinks. "For a while.", she tells him, "Obviously not since Christmas. Which didn't exactly make it easier to tell you.". Draco turns back to without meeting her eyes. "It would've been better to tell me than let me find out his way.", he says. Y/n looks at him softly. "Of course. It's definitely not how I wanted it to come out. But in all honesty... would the outcome be any different if I had told you? You always let me know how little you think of muggles. You still would've broken up with me.", she points out to him. Draco stays quiet and shrugs. "I don't know. Probably. It's not like we could be together like this.", he says. Y/n nods. "Yeah, guess it's against the law for people like us to be together. Your wizard police probably would have to erase my memories or something.", she says. Draco shrugs again. "It's... it's not against the law, actually. There are plenty of mixed couples.", he relents, "But my parents would never accept you". Y/n gives him a confused look. "Your parents?", she asks him. "No offense, Draco, but I don't give a fuck about your parents. I was concerned about you accepting it. You didn't strike me with the open-minded, tolerant mindset, you know.", she tells him. Draco looks away again. He seemed to be ashamed. "Look, I know I said some horrible things, but...", he starts. "But what?", y/n interrupts him, "You made it pretty clear what you think about people like me. Don't try to tell me you've changed suddenly. Because I don't buy it." Draco looks down in defeat. Y/n feels like it's the first time he's been called out on his racist attitude. She pulls her jacket closer around her body. Good, she thinks. "You're right.", he tells her, "And I'm sorry for the things I said. Actually, I've been thinking a lot about it". "About what?", she asks. "Muggles... and you, I guess.", he says. "Elaborate.", y/n simply demands. Draco shrugs and huffs. "Well, you see... I never had any contact with muggles. All I knew about your world, is what my parents told me.", he tries to explain.

Y/n starts shaking her head. "Nu-uh. Don't blame this on your parents. That's an excuse when you're six years old. At some point, you're old enough to question the things your parents say. You're old enough to understand the world and how human beings treat each other", y/n calls him out. Draco nods in defeat. "Yes, and I never did. I never questioned it. But I've been questioning it since I found out you're a muggle.", he tells her. Y/n rolls her eyes. "Oh, so it's been an eye-opening event, yes? Sorry, but years of internalized racism don't go away because you have one friend who is different.", she says bitterly. Draco nods again. "Probably not.", he admits, "but it did change my mind a little bit. I always had this idea how muggles are. You know, dumb, different." "Thank you.", y/n says dryly. Draco takes his hands out of his pocket and waves them in front of him in defense. "No, that's not... ugh. I mean, I realized that you're not that different from us. I mean I didn't notice you weren't a witch for years. I guess I'm the dumb one.", he explains. Y/n shrugs. "Sounds about right.", she tells him. "Doesn't mean you were right to not tell me.", he points out. Y/n shrugs again. "It wasn't. I was a coward and selfish.", she answers. "Sounds about right.", Draco repeats her sarcastically.

They stare at each other for a while in silence. "So, what now?", y/n asks. Draco shrugs. "Good talk, have a good live?", y/n suggests. Draco looks at her wide-eyed. "You want that?", he asks her. Y/n shrugs. "Do we have a different choice? Your parents will kill you when they find out about your muggle girlfriend. And my parents sure as hell will kill me if they find out I'm meeting the guy who stayed with me in an inn all alone for two days.", she declares. "You got in trouble with your parents?", Draco asks carefully. Y/n nods. "Yeah, what did you think? You left me at a magical inn in the middle of the night. Did you think I stayed and went home the next day like nothing happened? I went home in the middle of the night and my lie blew up in my face.", she tells him. Draco looks down ashamed. "I shouldn't have left you there.", he says. Y/n shrugs. "Whatever. Anyways, since our parents will not approve of this, probably better to call it off, eh?", she answers. Draco looks at her. Does he actually look sad?, y/n asks herself. "I mean... what if they don't know?", he asks quietly. Y/n laughs dryly at that. "Yeah, that worked out great the first time.", she says. Draco looks like she hit him in the face. "Because I was ignorant and you kept your secret. But we can do it differently this time.", he pleads with her and y/n thinks that it's a little bit pathetic. Also, she's really glad he is because right now her pride is in her own way. "You call me out when I'm a prick and you don't keep secrets.", he proposes. Y/n shrugs. "How about we both don't keep secrets?", she says carefully. Draco seems to cheer up immediately. "Deal.", he prompts. Y/n gives him a small smile.

Suddenly it's awkward between them. "Sooooo...?", y/n says and makes an awkward hand gesture. "So, we stay together?", Draco ends her sentence. "Yes?", y/n answers. "That doesn't sound convincing.", Draco deadpans. Y/n takes a deep breath. "Yes.", she tells him. Draco gives her a soft smile. "Now what?", y/n asks awkwardly. Draco shrugs. "We hug?", he proposes. Y/N smiley back. "Okay.", she replies. Awkwardly, they step forward and put their arms around each other. For a moment, y/n feels really uncomfortable. Then, Draco's smell hits her and he pulls her closer so that her face rests against his shoulder. Y/n's body instantly relaxes and she hugs him back closer. After a while, they loosen the hug a bit and are face-to-face with each other. "Do we...?", Draco asks carefully and y/n gives him a soft smile. "Yes.", she whispers and pulls his face towards hers. Their lips meet in a soft kiss and Draco leans in. Y/n would've enjoyed the kiss if her phone hadn't started vibrating in her pocket. Draco jumps back immediately. "What's that?", he stutters. "Just my phone.", she tells him and pulls it out of her pocket. It's Olivia.

"Hate to interrupt the moment, but it's half past three. We need to take the next bus back to the café.", Olivia's voice echoes on the other side of the phone. Y/n swirls around and looks around frantically. "On your right.", Olivia tells her and y/n catches her leaning on a streetlamp on the other side of the road. "How did you-?" "Get here?", Olivia finishes her sentence. "Didn't trust that guy and wanted to look after you. Seems like you didn' need me, bravo!", she tells y/n. "But seriously, we need to go." Y/n nods. "Alright, I'm coming.", she replies and hangs up. "I need to go.", she tells Draco. Draco's eyes are fixated on Olivia who gives him a short wave. "Does she know?", he asks her sharply. "About you and me? Yes. About you being a wizard? No. I keep my promises.", y/n tells him. Draco relaxes a bit and turns his gaze back to her. "You have to go?", he asks. "Yes, my mother picks me up soon. I'm already on thin ice with her. I'd rather not know what she'll do if she finds out about this.", she replies. Draco nods in agreement. "When will we see each other again?", he asks her hopefully. Y/n thinks about it for a moment. "Last week of the summer holidays? I might need some more time to convince my parents I won't do anything stupid.", y/n proposes. "Alright. Be careful. I'll send you an owl.", Draco says. Y/n nods and gives him a smile. They quickly hug each other and when y/n pulls away, Draco grabs her face and gives her a long, passionate kiss that leaves y/n breathless. She almost stumbles when he lets go of her. "See you soon, y/n.", Draco says softly.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In the next few weeks, y/n and Draco frequently exchanged letters. What happened in Salisbury is not spoken of anymore. However, Draco's tone and choice of words slightly changed. No snarky remarks about the muggle world anymore. Instead, he includes lengthy explanations about anything magical. Y/n thinks he is trying a little bit too hard, but is grateful nonetheless. Finally, she gets some context for some things he says. Meanwhile, y/n is a bit more open about her own life. About the movies she watches or the things she does with her friends. In a way, things are better now. Y/n doesn't carry around the weight of constant hiding and doesn't have to be careful about her words. Moreover, in Olivia, y/n finally found a friend who she can giggle about boys with and who can keep a secret.

Y/n and Draco met a few times at the end of August. Y/n showed her some muggle activities and Draco took her to Diagon Alley again and made her try all kinds of magical things. Of course, it's a risk to take y/n to magical places but Draco decided that y/n managed to blindside him for 5 years, others probably won't notice for like 5 Minutes. It's been a bliss, really. Finally, this feels like a real relationship to y/n. They're just some teenagers holding hands and making out and sneaking around their parents. Y/n wished these moments last forever but sooner or later September arrives and Draco has to go back to Hogwarts.

Y/n is standing at King's Cross. Draco and her are hiding behind a pillar at platform 8. He already crossed over to platform 9 3/4 20 minutes ago after saying goodbye to his parents. He came back to say goodbye to y/n a couple of minutes later. "It's only until Christmas.", Draco says as y/n clings to his chest. She buries her face into him. "I know, but somehow this feels worse than last year.", she mumbles. Draco rubs her back and grins. "Geez, I wonder why.", he says. Y/n pinches his arm. Draco lets go of her and rubs her arms. "I'll write you every week, I promise.", he tells her. "You should really get a phone. We could talk every day.", y/n argues. She's been trying to convince him for the past weeks. Communication would be so much easier. Also, her mum gets suspicious about the amount of bird shit that's on her windowsill. Fair enough, she doesn't seem to get that a literal owl is visiting her daughter. Instead, she gives y/n shit about feeding pigeons.

"Seriously, it won't be that bad. School starts soon and then we both have so much school work up our asses, we won't even notice until Christmas comes around.", Draco tries to soothe her. Y/n sighs. "I guess. I'll still miss you.", she tells him defeated. Draco smiles at her softly. "Yeah, I'll miss you too.", he replies. He leans down and gives her a kiss on the lips. Y/n's eyes flicker to the big clock behind Draco. "You have to go.", she points out and Draco nods. Y/n's lips form a thin line. She really hates this. Draco softly strokes over her cheek. "Yeah. See you soon, love. Don't miss me too much.", he says as he turns around to catch his train. Suddenly, y/n's face lits up. "Hey, Draco!", she yells after him. He turns around. "We've survived summer! In contrast to Blaise and that girl!", she yells. Draco laughs and shakes his head. "Well, at least I have something to brag about.", he laughs as he makes his way to platform 9 3/4.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tag list: @gypsylilim @caffeine-addict-slug @huiiline @rclector @am0iur @nofacenonamelikekira @0iheartu @jahaina @eringaitskill @jae-is-confused @stormy-stardust @a-beaverhausen @niyahzda1

[Please leave a note if you'd like to be tagged too.]

[wannaeatramyeon]

Ryuhei Kuroda x Reader: Japanese 101

G/N. Ryuhei teaches you some japanese.

You cup your mouth with both hands, take a deep breath and shout, "Kutabare!" (Fuck you!)

A few coworkers turn to you in shock, including the one whose attention you were aiming for.

Ryuhei spins around, eyes lighting up and copies your motion. "Shinee!" (Die!)

Internally flipping through your tiny repertoire of Japanese, it takes you a moment before understanding dawns and you cackle.

It leaves you both with a smile for the rest of the day.

.

.

You repeat the word after him, testing it out for the first time, "Chinchin." (Dick) and then put your own spin on it:

"I hate Eugene, he's a chinchin."

It doesn't really work but it makes Ryuhei laugh anyway.

.

.

Pointing to a stray cat, you exclaim, "Kawaii!" (Cute!)

Ryuhei huffs at your childishness. You're pretty cute too.

.

.

"Hey," you whisper to the blonde seated next to you, "teach me something new."

Face hidden behind his mask, he tilts his head at you as if to say not now.

"Please, before my brain falls asleep."

Ryuhei turns back to Eugene droning on. Something about quarterly growth and being on target, then leans close and mutters, "Kuso kurae."

You jot it down phonetically at the top of your notepad, "Meaning?"

"Eat shit."

You muffle your giggles just in time.

.

.

"Kuso kurae!" you repeat at Ryuhei the next day.

Grinning hard, he gives you a nod and fist pump, "Ganbatte!" (Do your best!)

.

.

In the huskiest, most sensual voice you can muster up, you breathe into his ear, "Iku~" (I'm coming~)

Shit.

Ryuhei's head swims.

Maybe he shouldn't have taught you that one.

.

.

Smiling wide, and holding up the phone to his face, "Baka!" (Idiot!)

Steadying your hand with his, Ryuhei takes a small step back to focus on what you're showing him. Ah, it's a candid photo of him taken this morning, right after you called his name and thrusted the lens in his face.

He looks very handsome, even if he says so himself.

The expression that you captured though, he's not sure what to make of it. Is that what his face is like when he looks at you? He looks vulnerable, exposed. More than he has been in a long time.

"Baka!" you repeat again, like a kid learning a new word - and he supposes, that it is new and novel for you.

"Baka," he agrees, because he does feel like one where you're concerned.

.

.

"Daisuki da." Ryuhei whispers into your ear. Quiet, but not quiet enough as Kenta, sitting on his other side, startles at his words.

You scribble the sounds on your notepad, along with another message 'What does that mean?' then give him a gentle prod with your pen.

Ryuhei's eyes flicker to the paper but he doesn't respond.

"What does it mean?" You say aloud this time, risking drawing the ire of Eugene. Ryuhei gives you a shrug and you click your tongue.

"Fine, I'll just look it up later myself," you hiss, petulant and pouting. "Bakayaro," (Bastard) you add for good measure.

He doesn't react, on the surface. Instead, below the boardroom table, he aims his hand towards you then it springs forward, quick as a dart, peevish fingers pinching at your waist and you squeal.

The entire room turns towards you.

"Sorry," you mutter, face burning red.

.

.

You look it up later that night and feel a different warmth on your face. Growing to the tips of your ears, all the way down to your toes.

Daisuki da.

(I really like you.)

[jungle-angel]

Winter Blues (Bob Floyd x Reader)

Summary: It's the time of year when you're not feeling quite yourself, but thank God for your husband

You had come home later than usual after a long week, exhausted beyond all human reasoning and your body screaming for rest.

All week long it had been one thing after another, first with your students and then with having to prep for the holidays and stressful situations outside the home. You felt every last cell in your body screaming for you to rest, your head heavy and aching from the stress.

You parked the truck in the driveway, the snow falling heavily as you stepped out onto the driveway with the last minute supplies for Thanksgiving dinner. The stress had weighed so heavy on your mind that no sooner were you through the door than you cracked. The tears started falling from your eyes as you hung up your coat, scarf, hat and mittens.

Your crying must've been a little more noticeable than you initially thought when you felt a set of arms coiling around your waist and a soft cheek smushed against the back of your head.

"My sweet baby," Bob mumbled. "What's wrong?"

"Oh Bob," you whimpered. "I'm just.....I can't.....I can't right now."

"Shhhh," Bob hushed. "You come with me and get settled. I'll make you a hot mint tea and we'll pop in a movie."

You nodded as he kissed your cheek. He helped you over to the couch where a blanket had been messily tossed aside, no doubt from an afternoon nap he had taken. As soon as you heard the kettle on the stove beginning to whistle, Bob brought in two mugs full of steaming hot peppermint tea, one for you and one for himself.

You told him everything that had happened in your day, even the little things that seemed to be bothering you. You felt a little bad dumping it all on him at once, but you knew he was a good listener who would help you.

"Oh sweetheart," he said wistfully. "Don't let it get to you. I know it's easier said than done, but I don't want you to stress yourself out."

You snuggled a little closer to him, his warm body comforting and soothing like the mint tea you had both been drinking. "I know I shouldn't stress myself out like that but....."

"Hey," Bob said reassuringly. "You know I love you even when you're stressed out right?"

You nodded.

"So come here and lets get cozy," he said, drawing you closer and kissing your head.

Bob switched on a movie and when it began playing you laughed a little. "Really Bob?" you chuckled. "Isn't it a little too early for us to be watching Christmas Vacation?"

"It's never too early for a Christmas movie sweetheart," he said happily, gently stroking the back of your neck and pressing a sweeet kiss to your lips.

You both laughed throughout the movie, quoting it back and forth until you forgot the troubles of the day, the both of you warm and cozy under the covers and falling into the deepest sleep you could have imagined.

[mrghostrat]

"He needed an internet connection so he could download an app to draw with, but the whole point of setting the thing up in London was because he knew Crowley understood all of this a whole lot better than he did."

Okayyyyy I just got violent flashbacks to the s2 finale this is evil 😭😭

But in all seriousness, I LOVED the new bnf au chapter, I mean the kiss??? I audibly gasped, it was soooo good

I was wondering if the witch and the witchfinder are a canon couple in the nice and accurate prophecies? Or are they just a very popular fanon ship? Or is it like good omens, where people saw the romantic subtext in the book and where it was made explicitly canon in the show?

I just think all options would be really interesting, given that Crowley and Aziraphale are both middle-aged queer people and the book came out thirty years ago. So they either would have had some representation back then, or they recognised themselves in the story and even though it wasn't canon, maybe those ideas would later explicitly be confirmed by Agnes Nutter nonetheless? Since all these options have really interesting implications for the way they both interacted with the source material, I'm really curious what your thoughts on the matter are.

Thank you so much for all the beautiful things you create for the fandom, both your fics and your art give me life and I'm so grateful for them ❤

omg you have no idea how excited i am about this question 😭 as i've written BNF, i've been quietly fleshing out more about their fictional fandom, and accidentally gotten reeeeally invested and am dying to talk about it 😭😭

i'm actually tempted to make some fanart of the witch & the witchfinder, using michael and david as facecasts to go full meta thphptftf. in b4 i write it as a fuckin book series for real

buttttt i'll put all my N&A thoughts under a cut so i dont ramble too long on your dashes 💛

The Nice and Accurate Prophecy: Agnes Nutter's book series (turned play, turned film, turned tv series); the fandom in my fic Big Name Feelings

the idea of using Agnes Nutter's "Nice and Accurate" book for the in-fic fandom was taken from @tawnyontumblr's fic New Messages (i just thought that would be a fun fanon consistency to follow), but all the details about the story and characters are me.

N&A takes inspiration from Good Omens (as a story, and as a fandom) but isn't intended to be a direct copy of it. the original paperback series is a few books long, and each adaptation of the books are considered good, accurate, canonical content. the tv show (a HBO series) is the most recent, highest quality, and most popular. The Witcher style, high fantasy quality.

agnes is loudly supportive of the lgbt community just like neil/david/michael are. but i imagine that for the series to be so "marketable" over the last 30 years, there isn't an explicit queer relationship between the witch & finder. there are canon queer side characters but the witch & finder are a little more nuanced.

the witch and the witchfinder aid each other through time, working together to defeat the evils in the story (like Aziraphale and Crowley from GO). there's tension between them, but boundless love, and plenty of flirtation, despite the running "we shouldn't, we're meant to be enemies" theme. they would canonically get together at some point in the story, probably towards the end after they've spent some time dancing around each other.

the thing that makes this vague is: the witch reincarnates through the story, almost doctor who style. they're a trans icon, much like how the GO fandom looks at Crowley and all his gender ambiguity.

when they finally tryst with the witchfinder, they're female. it's by pure happenstance that they're female presenting at that stage of the story, but still widely critiqued over the years. the thing that canonises the mlm relationship is that the witch is said to carry their consciousness through each reincarnation— they're not a new person like The Doctor is when he regenerates.

the start of the book series spends more time on "Crowley and Aziraphale's favourite male reincarnation", while the movie and tv show only briefly montages through some of the witch's faces. the mlm side of the fandom most definitely lost their minds over the brief few minutes of screentime that they got of the male witch, and has absolutely gifsetted it to death.

i've done it like this because so much of (every) fandom has always been seeking out representation and filling gaps where the original content lacks. there's something to be said about the solidarity of queer fans creating more queer content for themselves. except, in the case of N&A, they're getting to work from a source material that is genuinely queer supportive, unlike fandoms like SPN and BBC Sherlock that are fighting against the tide of queerbaiting and buried gays.

it also gives aziraphale and crowley a chance to band together in the next chapter when they talk to a dickhead at the party:

i haven't exactly decided what happens with the witchfinder, like if the story takes place over hundreds of years and he keeps reincarnating as the same lookin dude (like how jack whitehall plays both Thou Shall Not Commit Adultery and Newton Pulsifer) or if it's set over one lifetime and the witch just gets killed and regenerates a lot. i do like the idea of there being some "through the ages" shenanigans, and a canonical "modern day" setting like GO has.

but i gotta be careful bc i genuinely can't stop thinking about this fake story that's barely mentioned in my fan fic or i'll end up writing the damn thing myself

[thatoneguydownthestreet]

Yo! I really love your apocalypse yuu writings I keep coming back to see if it has updated.

I read the Lilia finds out part and when I read the "Epel gave Yuu an apple and he didn't know what it was" it got me thinking about it all night.

How would the first years react to Yuu not eating anything at all(probably other than bread) because he doesn't know what those foods are?

________________________________

FEM ALIGNED DNI

Yuus pronouns are he/him, although they're mentioned briefly

This is barely proofread so please excuse the grammar mistakes.

Featuring: Epel, Ace, Duece, Jack, and sebek (there is implied lilia at the very end but it is literally one sentence)

Warnings: Talks of starvation, Yuu's illness, and survivers guilt, so skip this if you're uncomfortable with any of that.

Also I know it's been over a month. I have no excuse. I just didn't feel like it. But I have been teaching myself how to draw so I can be a bigger simp to Jamil so that's fun ig.

________________________________

Damn bro, you really don't know shit huh?

Epel was excited, to say the least.

I mean, could you really blame him? It's not everyday that you get a big ol' crate full of the apples that you were raised with.

By all means, epel should've been long sick of eating apples. Having them almost everyday for majority of his life, dried and dehydrated in the winter, and fresh and juicy in the spring and summer.

But no, no epel felmeir loves those apples. Every single one he ate seemed to effortlessly send him back to the simpler times of his childhood. Where he would send hours upon hours avoiding his siblings and playing games with his cousins in the orchards and taking naps in the sun while he waited for his meemaws infamous apple pies to finish baking. And meemaw would almost always let him have the first slice! Of the ones she wasn't going to sell at least.

He really missed her...

He'd have to ask her to bake him another one this winter.

But just getting to read the letter she had wrote, along with his parents and one of the towns kids that always followed him around like a lost baby duck, put a smile on his face.

Yeah. He'd get to see them soon, and once he graduates, he can get them more money, and be strong enough to protect them if it ever came to that.

Unfortunately, as great as his parents apples were, they couldn't fight the natural forces of time.

Dear sevens- they'd sent him nearly three dozen apples! All high quality too... it shouldn't effect sales too much. The orchards were big, and his parents would rather give up that expensive family heir loom necklace that his mother always wore than start selling spoiled apples.

But still, epel couldn't possibly eat thirty-six apples before they all started to rot. Plus, he didn't know how long they took to ship to the isle of sages, so that cut the time frame even shorter.

.....Does Jack like apples?

Should he even be considering giving Jack an apple to begin with? Their relationship was pretty vague. We're they actually friends or just study buddies?

Study buddies can give eachother gifts too right? And plus, it's food, not a 24 carrot gold ring or something crazy like that.

It should be fine. Maybe he'll give one to ace too. They were friends. Surely.

.

.

.

Ace trappola would say he was a good friend. I mean, he wasn't the best by any means, but he was decent.

Yeah, he could be kind of a dick. But who isn't at this point, honestly, even deuce, even cater had their moments.

But he was still someone the people in his life could go to for things, usually physically, tangible this like food or an extra ball or something, but he wasn't completely useless when it came to emotions either.

You could come to him if something was bothering you. He probably won't help you actually fix it but he can at least make you laugh.

So why didn't you want to laugh?

You had taken your mask off a few weeks ago. And like a bucket of ice cold water had been dumped on him he realized it was the first time he ever saw you eat any food here at all.

Were you eating at all before then? What about water?

Thank the seven you were only here for around a week. But surely, you were dehydrated.

(You were definitely dehydrated. Deuce gave you a water bottle and you chugged it like it was your only chance at life. Which, to be fair, it probably was your only chance at life.)

Ace didn't know what your life was like before.

Ace didn't want to know either.

He didn't do well with heavy topics, always changing the subject when one came up unless he was personally involved in some way.

Other people life didn't concern him, and that was something he lived by.

...but still.

This was going a bit too far, don't you think?

Ace shot a look to deuce, clear concern instead of the regular teasing, which caught his roomates attention faster than he thought it would.

Ok. So deuce had noticed too.

Just goes to show how obvious it was that something is very wrong here.

Now, because ace had never asked, and he probably never will, he didn't know what your relationship with food was like before you came here. But. It couldn't have been this right?

A person couldn't only survive on some bread and room temperature water, right?

You sat across from him at your guy's unofficial table in the cafeteria, drinking the water at a moderate pace, as you didn't want to deal with another scolding from a certain housewarden, doing your best to keep a careful eye on grim as he went to go get his food from the lunch line.

And thank the seven for that, really. If grim turned back and saw that you weren't watching him for even a second, who knows that kind of ruckus would result?

But all that aside, you were still scarily underweight. Seriously perfect, how were you even alive?

Ace looked at deuce again. Deuce looked back.

He sighed.

Ace never, ever thought he would do something like this.

But for sevens sake, you were one of his best friends. And Ace will be damned if he just let you do this to yourself.

So with a deep breathe, he looked at you, and then turned back to what he was pretty sure was an ex-gang member, and nodded.

And for once, deuce understood.

They had to do something.

.

.

.

You reminded Deuce Spade of that stray cat that his mother would always feed when he was a child.

Underweight, scared, scarred, and confused.

Always having an air if caution and paranoia, ready to react, as if anything could just jump out and grab you at any time.

But you weren't a cat, were you?

No. You were a person. Someone his age, maybe younger, that had obviously seen horrors he couldn't even understand. Which just made this whole situation even sadder.

Because if you lived like this, then what the hell was stopping him? What about his mother? What was stopping her from having the same fate?

Duece ignored the memories of his mother giving him food and taking none for herself, saying she wasn't hungry.

But he couldn't quite ignore them, nor could he ignore the pit in his stomach whenever he looked at you.

...Listen perfect, he doesn't know what you went through to be like this, but he knows damn well this isn't normal.

It can't be normal. Hiding this much food underneath your floorboards couldn't ever be normal.

The two of you were just hanging out in your room in Ramshakle. Grim was in the lounge, he was sure, and you had stared off into space before asking the date.

When he told you, you had a look of slight panic as you ripped the rug off from its place on the floor, and started pulling apart the boards.

And what for?

The reveal of a large stash of food, mostly non-perishables, but a few snacks here and there too.

Snacks that were about to expire, apparently.

You turned to look back at him, a sheepish look on your face, and what looked like a bag if chips in your hand.

Deuce didn't know what face he was making.

He just knew it wasn't one he'd want you to see

.

.

.

If someone were to ask Jack howl if he was your friend. He wouldn't know to to say.

I mean yeah, you helped save his entire dorms ass way back when, yeah, you and him absolutely went throught it during azuls little "episode", and yeah, the two of you had plenty of mutual friends.

But we're the two of you friends?

Jack wasn't sure.

Because by all accounts, you should be.

It didn't change the fact that you weren't. Not really. Not by his definition and not by yours.

So what were you?

Well, you weren't friends. That was already established. And you were too close to be acquaintances (he didn't think acquaintance fell asleep on each other in the botanical gardens, only to wake up five minutes till curfew and just haul ass back to their respective dorms with smiles on their faces), so...what did that leave?

Well... I guess it left this.

"Eat it"

"....huh?"

Jack didn't know you that well. But that didn't mean he couldn't see..this happening. And it definitely didn't mean he didn't care.

So here he was. Holding a pastrami sandwich about an inch away from your face, silently begging you to just shut up and eat it.

Come on perfect, he bought this with his own money. Just humor him, please.

You eyed the sandwich like it was the most untrustworthy thing you'd ever seen. Jack's not going to lie, it kind of hurt.

But it wouldn't matter if you ate it, so he sucked it up.

...at least he would if you'd actually take the fucking sandwich.

Seriously, it was starting to tick him off.

Jack briefly considered just varying off and giving the sandwich to ruggie or something, or just eating it himself. He wasn't the biggest fan of pastrami but who knows, maybe the school made it better.

Honestly, he probably would have done just that if the image if you leaning against the wall looking ready to pass out from, what he knew, was malnutrition.

The event itself actually happened around two weeks ago, give or take. Jack thinks the only real reason he remembers it so well is because, well, it was the moment.

The defining moment, the moment where it just clicked that something was very wrong here.

He already knew that of course, I mean, look at you.

But as it turns out, watching someone actively starve to death in front of you will keep you up at night.

His mind turned to ruggie for a split second, before forcibly shoving that thought down where all the other thoughts he didn't want to think about were.

Like that time when he was a kid with a crush on Vil....yeah, Jack's happy he got o er that one to say the least. Nothing against Vil, he's a great friend and all (they were friends right?), but them in a relationship? Yeah. No. Not happening. No thankyou.

...yeah.

Jack mentally slapped hi.self and proceeded to shove his weird thoughts down yet again and refocus on getting his not-quite-friend to eat.

You were leaning back a lot farther than you were a second ago, if you did that anymore you'd probably just end up on the ground.

...jack sighed. This was going to take a while wasn't it?

By the end of the lunch period, you had come to a compromise, jack you slip the sandwich with you and take the other half for himself.

You ended up splitting your half with grim, who reluctantly took it. You had actually eaten yours too!...after you took the while thing apart and inspected and obsessed over it like how he'd seen Rook do to his housewardens that one time!

But still, it was something.

It was a start. And that's really all he could ask for at this point.

.

.

.

Sebek didn't notice anything about you at first. And he didn't particularly care much either. He was a guard for sevens sake! He had a deep responsibility!

He had a crown prince, that he oh so admired, to protect! Not to mention silver, who he had to wake up at every given turn, and not to mention Lilia, who had recently been going harder on their training sessions.

So to waste his time with a human? With a weak little human that didn't even come close to his current list if priorities?

That's time he simply did not have!

...So why was he here?

He was supposed to be looking for his charge. His charge, who always seemed to wind up around the old, abandoned Ramshakle building and just dissappear in the nick of time.

It had been happening more and more lately, especially since that new perfect moved in.

He would be lying if he said he cared too much about him. Again, he didn't have time to be curious about some strange human boy with some strange past.

But still, he couldn't quite contain the way he jumped back when he'd first seen them.

Whoever he was, he looked so...sick.

...he didn't have time for this.

Turning back on his heel, he refocused his mind on finding his lord again, and quickl- wait- silver. Oh great sevens. Silver wake up!

Ok. Sebek really didn't have time for this.

...and yet.

Here he was, standing next to you, arms out ready to catch you at a moments notice if you really were going to collapse like he thought you were.

He hadn't been this close to you before.

And now he could see that you weren't just sick.

Great seven, you looked like you were dying...

Sebek zigbolt had always known humans were weak, fragile creatures. Never able to even light a candle next to faeries. Never able to light a candle next to him, and certainly not his young master.

But this was just pushing it.

Sebek was stronger than his human counterparts. He would long outlive them. He thought of silver for the shortest second and then quickly pushed that thought to the side. This was not the time. Buteven with those facts, sebek still knew that humans weren't made of fine glass. Even if the people in his homeland liked to act like it, Sebek still knew that humanity wasn't completely hopeless.

One strong gust of wind wouldn't knock them over.

One missed meal wasn't enough to do detrimental damage to their health.

Pulling one all nighter would barely put a dent in their day to day lives, aside from the obvious fatigue and.

But with you?

With you? Alwats looking like you could kneel over and die then and there on the classroom floor?

...

Sebek want so sure anymore.

.

.

.

Epel had eaten more apples than any normal person should ever be able to eat.

Sevens help him, his stomach.

Despite the waves of pain that shit through him every now and then, epel wasn't mad.

Yeah, maybe eating a whole eight apples in the span of two hours wasn't his smartest idea, but the sweet nostalgia that seemed to wash over him and warm his very soul? Yeah no, it was worth it.

So no. Epel felmeir wasn't mad.

And laying in a bed that was much too soft for his taste, a direct contrast from the slightly itchy blankets and the hard mattresses back home, epel glance over to the almost empty crate of apples that were sitting just under his work desk.

...As much as Epel wanted to eat them, he wanted to do this even more.

Epel sat up, ignoring his stomach pain the best he could, and began a mental list of all the people he knew. And then a silent debate over who deserved his families apples in the first place.

Ok. First up Ace.

Epel would say they were friends. Not close friends by any means, but friends nonetheless.

Epel could give him one.

Next was Jack.

...In all honesty, epel didn't know. We're they friends, or just simply homework buddies that occasionally hung out?

...he could spare one for Jack, maybe they'd be friends then if they weren't already.

Duece.

Yes. Just- just yes. That day on the beach had changed their relationship forever. Duece was like a brother to him at this point.

He was goddamn getting an apple.

Epel chuckled a little at the realization that he was treating this like one of those elimination gameshows his meemaw liked.

Ok...he had two apples left after that.

Sebek wasn't really his friend was he? He certainly didn't make it seem like he was. If anything, Sebek was trying his damnedest to make them all belive the exact opposite, really.

....maybe he should just give the apple to Rook.

Or Vil.

Maybe.

Ok. He has one apple left.

The two of you weren't really friends. But you were friendly. If nothing else, you had been nothing but kind to him so far.

And plus, you looked uh. Half dead. To put it nicely.

And so, with a smile on his face, epel took out the crate of apples and began placing them on a bag that would make them easier to carry around tomorrow.

He couldn't wait.

.

.

.

It's funny how your whole life can change in a single moment, especially when you don't even know what that moment was.

Why were you here? Where is here anyway? Surely, magic didn't exist right?

The air wasn't always this clean right?

Water wasn't readily available at the turn of a handle right?

People didnt...people werent...weren't....

Heh. Heheha.

Why.

Why were you here?

Why were you here?

Why you and not one of the kids? What the hell have you ever done but use up medical supplies in a fruitless effort to keep you alive.

Why was this world so...pretty. happy. Clean.

Why this world and not your own? What had this world ever done to deserve this luxury of life.

...What had yours?

What had you?

Out of all the base commanders, the medics, the farmers, or children, or any of the other apprentice kids that you sometimes had to work with.

You were here. And they were still trapped inside of that hell.

...You didn't deserve this.

You died. You were on that beach and you died.

You woke up in a coffin, but something told you this wasn't the afterlife.

That something being the blood that you coughed up the other day.

It wasn't from internal bleeding, you k ew that much. Rather, it was from you coughing so hard that something in your throat had ripped.

It really didn't matter. You had spent nearly half an hour in a panic, choking and trying to unclog your airways, while grim and the ghosts you had come to somewhat love, stood behind you, offering what little comfort they could.

It wasn't the first time this happened after all.

You were still bedridden for a good two days after that. Thank God for the weekend.

Time passed in a blur while you were like that. It always did, mostly because you were asleep ninety percent of the time. The other twn being dedicated to medicine and a vain attempt to get food you knew you couldn't stomach to stay down.

So no. This wasn't the afterlife.

It was just a beautiful second chance that you didn't deserve.

It was so confusing.

And this was so confusing.

What..is this weird red thing being handed to you?

Epel looked at you with a hopeful expression on his face. It reminded you of the little girl you used to look after...

You take the..thing.

Glancing over to your right, you watch Ace take a large bite out of it with a smile on his face.

Ok. So not poisonous. Good to know.

You saw Duece do the same thing.

You felt Jack staring at you, but you didn't dare look at him.

[marimayscarlett]

hi! :) since fans have gotten richard and paul those paulchard flags, banners, pieces of fabric (you know what i mean) during the boat ride a few shows ago, i'm a bit cautious about people taking things a little ... further than they have been before

in my understanding, in fandom spaces, it's mostly agreed upon to keep shipping stuff in those fandom spaces and away from the band members/real life. i say mostly, because people that go overboard are everywhere, and we don't know what kind of stuff the band has been exposed to in the past during meet and greets, signing sessions and so on. on the other hand, i'm not really on instagram, so i don't know what has been going on over there. nevertheless, i've read something about a past girlfriend of richard having been harassed on insta around 2019 when richard and paul first started kissing after ausländer – don't know if i remember that one correctly, though. and with paul being in a long-term relationship, i feel a bit weird about people bringing the shipping name up close to them; or maybe that's just me? i was wondering about how the behavior of one fan might encourage another ones behavior encouraging someone else even further, and so on. though i'm fully aware that everyone is responsible for their own actions. am i taking things too seriously? the band has had years of experience with fans and popularity after all, and i can imagine them being careful with, for example, searching certain things up online

i was curious about your point of view on all this :)

Hey,

Thank you for your detailed message, which I find really balanced and thoughtful! It's an interesting topic, and I've often thought about it, as well as the Paulchard ship itself. I might ramble a bit, sorry.

First of all, I have to admit that I was a bit taken aback when I saw the footage with the flags, as this was the first time a direct contact about this to the band was made. It felt like a fourth wall was being broken - kind of hard to describe. I'm convinced that both of them have some concept of what Paulchard or shipping in general is - Richard had fanfiction/slash explained to him in this interview once and seemed quite neutral, almost positive, about it. Additionally, they both display a clear affection for each other outwardly, so it shouldn't be surprising that specific shipping structures develop from that. I think the dynamic between Paul and Richard is so interesting and attractive to many because a lot has happened in their history. Close collaboration and friendship from the start (x), intense disagreements, fundamentally different personality traits, fiery tempers, strong opinions (x), and yet they seem to have found their way back to each other on a personal level, thanks in part to external mediation (for example by Schneider). They appear to be an emotional support for each other on tour; I get the impression Richard needs this closeness or expressed affection, and Paul seems to have a sense of what his counterpart needs and shows Richard his appreciation, whether on stage or backstage. It's just lovely to see how they've developed over the decades. Their relationship has such a strong humanity with a wide range of emotions, and coupled with the displayed tenderness, it's just very good shipping material, objectively speaking.

I had a feeling that there would be some kind of confrontation about the topic at some point, especially since 2019. I'm glad it was such a 'tame' approach, a sweet flag with a drawing and a heart (even though a drawing of the two without the 'Paulchard forever' would have sufficed). Still, I think this step is enough, and there shouldn't be more actions like this. Rubbing it in their faces more would be unnecessary and unneeded. This is where common sense should kick in. The fact is that Paul and Richard are not together; regarding their sexuality, it's not my place to make definitive statements, but Paul has been with Arielle for ages, and Richard has had numerous longer and shorter relationships with women. So, comments on IG, whether on family members', partners', or Paul and Richard's accounts, are absolutely inappropriate, disrespectful, and detached from reality. We mustn't forget that these are real people with real relationships and feelings, and we really don't need to rub it in their faces. I think shipping in fandom circles is fine, but there must be respect for the individuals in direct interactions, and family members should definitely be kept out of it.

As I said, I found the flag cute and sweet, but more doesn't need to happen imo. I'm also a bit worried that this might inspire others to do something that is too much, which I hope won't happen. In conclusion, I must commend both Richard and Paul for how they handled the situation. Both were mildly interested and took the flag without making a big deal out of it.

Thank you to @m---e---l for gathering some thoughts about this ask and discussing this with me 🤍

[the-path-to-redemption]

Really late because only yesterday I've started browsing the RWDE tag to see what the fandom has been up to, and saw some of your WF posts.

*rips off hair* Is it weird that I feel SO uncomfortable with the "redeemed Adam" AUs? I adore Adam 100% but every AU, even from some Adam fans, has that "Adam has to learn not to be racist" condescending vibe and punishes him more harshly than other characters. But, people, he WAS a literal SLAVE?! Doesn't matter if it happened when he was a child or a bit older, HE WAS A SLAVE AND HE WAS BRANDED?! PLEASE CUT HIM SOME SLACK?!

After a couple years of not being around I just feel that Adam fans as a collective still feel a bit traumatized from the discourse, so they try to justify their liking of Adam and overcompensate by punishing him harder, as if to say "See? I'm not that blind and biased as Adam haters say!".

I'm reading a fic currently that it's very good but even faunus are condescending and rude to Adam because of his 'racism' and my soul vanished. Instead of faunus trying to understand and support each other, isn't that even more isolating and alienating? Why are they cannibalizing each other? I know it literally happens in real life but as far as I've read, it's not bringing attention to that fact, but more like presenting it as a good thing. Again, I feel that everyone (fans) as a collective is FORGETTING ADAM WAS A LITERAL SLAVE and treating as if he had just been bullied in school for having horns. He shouldn't have other faunus policing his reactions (so far, he hasn't committed a crime, he just yelled and got very angry because he felt unsafe). It's clearly drawing a line where certain attitudes from trauma are "right" (being a cute crier, submissive, etc) and others are "wrong" (being angry, yelling, etc) because "it makes faunus look bad". Even worse, the faunus that scold Adam are generally on the cuter side of faunus traits. Isn't that just feeding into the ideas already set by humans? That faunus should be cute and behave well and that any faunus that is more aggressive and "dangerous" should be considered a threat?

*very deep sigh* I'm sorry for the long ask but I had to vent for a bit and see if I'm not that crazy yet. It's just that reading those fics makes me think we're gaslighting ourselves somehow, and how that can impact real life if we act like this over a cartoon, and it's really depressing. Thank you if you read all of this.

Long Post Ahead. Contains Spoilers for RWBY and Full Metal Alchemist. Mention of child slavery, genocide, systematic oppression, branding, disfigurement, violence, and racial abuse.

Don't apologize, babe, you're more than valid in your feelings regarding this issue. And yes, I do feel like there is a lot of overcompensation when it comes to how a lot of "Adam redemption" AU, but I believe that it's just because the writers haven't seen another way of writing his story without invalidating his experience yet. And that's understandable! This is a topic that is extremely complicated to explore, and to start one has to understand that there shouldn't be any separation of "good" and "bad" minorities, as well as the willingness to challenge the status quo that has taken characters like Adam on this path towards liberation.

I don't know if you have seen my post comparing the way RWBY and FMA writes a narrative of a minority opposing a racist system through violent means here, but the way that I see FMA succeeding in its efforts was that the narrative never demonize the way Scar feels about his hatred towards the people who wronged him and his people. And it rightfully shouldn't! His people were systematically murdered and experimented on, his brother who wanted to peacefully contribute to helping their people and was willing to learn about alchemy to find a common ground was murdered when he tries to protect Scar, which resulted in his arm being grafted onto Scar to save him, and the oppression of the Ishvalans still persist long after the conflict while the government oppressing them prosper. Scar has all the rights to be pissed off and went on a murderous revenge, and the narrative does. Not. Demonize him for that.

However, it criticize his actions when innocents are involved. And I'm not talking about Ed and Al, I'm taking about Winry. The daughter of the couple who saved Scar's life who he murdered in a fit of rage. The little girl who still extend her kindness to him despite not forgiving Scar for leaving her orphaned, because she broke the cycle of violence and that choice of hers let Scar pick an alternative to his violence. AKA, murdering the dictator who created the genocide of the Ishvalans. Again, the narrative of FMA doesn't make Scar out to be this monster who should be put down for not asking for his rights "nicely", it empathize with him, offer him new perspective, and gave him a chance to do the right thing while still getting his justice.

RWBY doesn't have this nuance to it, and I think that is why a lot of times, the "redeem Adam" AUs goes too hard on excusing his actions and/or overdo the criticism on his actions without attempting to unpack the systematic oppression that creates people like Adam and break it down. There's a balance you have to understand in order to write a convincing "redeem Adam" narrative that doesn't erase his own trauma, and it comes with actually calling out what happened to him as wrong and inhumane.

For Adam to "unlearn his racism", the authors have to look at the events that caused him to have this mentality and admit that it's a flawed system. They have to recognize that there is implicit biases like you mentioned between Faunus and how they're perceived in comparison to each other. The authors have to admit that Adam's hatred for humans and his actions were products of a hateful, racist society that sought out to kill him in every way that matters. You can't half-ass this topic by putting the blame on him; this isn't me saying that he shouldn't be called out for his violence on others, not at all, this is me saying that you need to see the forest, not just the tree. Adam unlearning and breaking the cycle of abuse requires him to be given some kind of hope, some kindness that he isn't a monster for rightfully being hateful towards people who oppressed him and his people. He needs to know that the world still have a place for him to heal and be better. And Adam shouldn't be the one to have to beg to see it by being "nice enough".

Thank you for your ask, anon. Please take a step back if this discourse is too much for you, your well-being is much more important. And I hope that my answer to your ask is somewhat satisfactory.

[greekceltic]

FAQ Page

She/her | 38 | I like cats and rain. My comic: https://catswaycomic.com/ My Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/greekceltic My Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/greekceltic Other links: https://linktr.ee/greekceltic Sorry in advance if you send me a message and I don't get back to you, I tend not to stress over messages/asks. I do try to read them though, and I'm always open to being asked questions about characters or my headworld/stories. I am already aware that my art is being copied. They're blocked. Please stop telling me about it. Rest of my FAQ is under the cut >

Can I repost your work? I don't mind as long as I'm credited. I'm less okay with my work being used as a pageviews grab, but it's probably not worth my time to care. If it's something I've selected to take down and don't have posted anymore, don't. If it's something you commissioned, go for it. You don't need to credit me every time you share it. Once in a while is cool.

Are you okay with fanart? What about OC interactions? Can I post it? Sure, just don't profit off of it and please credit me. If you want to draw my OCs interacting with yours that's also fine (and fun!)- though I prefer situations where their actions make sense. Alf wouldn't make your character cry, for example. He's grumpy but not cruel. Posting it is fine. Is it okay if I take inspiration from your art and concepts? I've been in a situation in recent years where another artist has taken far, far too much. It's a subject I'm pretty burnt out on. I recently saw another artist's take on this and it looked sensible to me. I'm just going to quote theirs. I have tried to find my own words, but right now I find myself more comfortable using someone else's. "Well, if you’re having to ask me for permission, either your design is too similar or you’re being overly nervous about a normal artistic process. You’re absolutely free to use my work as a source of inspiration but I’d strongly encourage you to think about the details from my design you like most, and remix them with other concepts into your own unique take."

Taking inspiration is something everyone does, but please don't become a shadow I get bi-weekly alerts about. Ideally your pool of inspiration will be many artists and concepts re-imagined into something unique to you- and that you're being honest with yourself about the result.

Your art is being copied! / Will you tell me who the copy cat is? I get a lot of messages about this and am tired. I'm sure if my art ends up somewhere it shouldn't be or there's something really worth my attention I'll find out through friends. Otherwise, I'm just sayin' get a second or third opinion before coming to my inbox. I probably already know about it.

I sent you a message and you didn't respond. Sorry about that. I tend not to stress about messages because it can be a drain. You're more likely to get a response if you let me know from the get go what you want, but nothing is guaranteed. Sometimes I didn't see it, sometimes I got busy or forgot, sometimes I plan to do it later, sometimes I just opted out. It's not personal. Where do you Rp? Are you looking for more partners? Discord mostly. Roleplay consumes a lot of time so these days I mostly only play with my buddy Thema. I probably wouldn't have time to play, but I like to hang around people that do and I don't mind being asked. Just please don't be sad if I never get around to responding! I'm most compatible with people who are comfortable with radio silence.

Can I use your characters in roleplay/as roleplay refs? Considering I actively roleplay my OCs and there's a potential for confusion, I'd rather you didn't. Though I think there's a difference between linking to my art and saying 'this is my character', and linking to it to say 'this has the mood I'm going for, but here's what's different about my character--'. The latter is fine.

Can I make Fan OCs for your setting? Thinking about this makes me tired. Maybe I'll get to a point where I'm more comfortable later, but for now I'd rather you didn't make something directly from my worlds. But lets be real, you don't need my permission to draw cat monsters and I take a huge amount of inspiration from ancient history. Many of my concepts are inspired by things that you can read about and be inspired too. If you see something and are curious if there's a historical source, just ask. Hopefully I'll remember.

Do I have permission to draw NSFW art of your characters? No, for a plethora of reasons, some easy to explain and some not, but I probably can't stop you. Just don't profit off of it or show it to me.

Do you have a website for your OCs? I have RP pages for them scattered all over the place and many of them are outdated, but as I type this I recently put some up on Toyhouse. https://toyhou.se/GreekCeltic

Do you have a website for your comic? Sure do. It's an expensive fuck. https://catswaycomic.com/ When does your comic update? Sporadically. I work on it when I have time. My income is solely freelance commissions and Patreon- mostly commissions.

There's other places you could post your comic! Yeah, I know. I may do that someday, but for now I like having my own house, even if it's an expensive fuck. (Not really, the renewal just hits around tax time, Lol).

[effloradox]

Oh that Thomas request with a forehead kiss was so cute. Could I pretty please request one where the reader and thomas start a relationship as ghosts and are super cute together. But most of the other ghosts just don't get it? They catch them holding hands or cuddling and the other ghosts just tease them until they finally realise how good thomas and the reader are for each other - 🌸 anon

don’t let the dreamer get lonely

This was such a cute request!! I hope you like it <3

Thomas Thorne x Ghost!Reader

You would think that after knowing someone for almost a decade that your fellow ghosts would be more observant to changes in your daily behaviour. Part of you is convinced that they have noticed and are just messing with you but deep down you know that most of them don't have the tact to do such a thing, especially Pat and Kitty. It can't be hard to miss all the adoring looks Thomas sends you, or spot the two of you when you go for your daily stroll to the lake for a moment of shared peace but the true nature of your relationship seems to have eluded most of your acquaintances.

The ones who know have been fairly upfront about possessing such information, you probably shouldn't have been overly surprised that Julian had been the first to work it out. Whilst you'd initially written the disgraced politician off as a crude fool, he didn't get to be as successful as he was without the eye for detail he obviously possesses. He'd been surprisingly happy to keep your little secret as long as it benefitted him every so often and to keep some semblance of normality you didn’t mind occasionally doing his bidding.

It’s not that you wanted to keep your relationship a secret per-se, it’s just been an enjoyable experience running around like teenagers in love. Thomas had been so bashful in the first few years when approached with any level of physical affection that it had taken months for him to even ask to hold your hand. Dating and courting rituals have changed so drastically since Thomas was alive that you knew the process of going from friends to dating would take a while but it had to move at a pace you were both completely comfortable with.

It doesn’t help that most of your fellow ghosts are quick to tease you and Thomas if you’re seen so much as holding hands. You’ve had more than one argument with Fanny over the implications that come with holding hands, since she can’t imagine a world where doing so without wedding rings is anything less than a cardinal sin. It’s almost fun to wave your entwined hands in front of her in the beginning, just to take delight in her mortified reactions.

It’s only when Pat almost walks in on a private moment that the cat is finally out of the bag about the two of you. He’d been on his way to his room when he’d overheard a loud laugh from one of the drawing rooms, immediately attracting his attention. He didn’t mean to eavesdrop, not really, but it wasn’t hard to recognise your laugh and he wanted to know the cause of it. It’s only when he hears a quiet exchanging of words that it occurs to him that this isn’t the kind of conversation he can just walk into.

“You know, I think you were sent for me.” The way you speak is soft, like you're afraid speaking any louder would break whatever bubble you've found yourself in and it peaks the scoutmaster’s curiosity.

“You flatter me with your words.” Pat isn't particularly surprised to find out that Thomas was the source of your joy, the two of you are very close after all. But he's never heard you speak to anyone like that and he can't help his curiosity so the scoutmaster inches closer to the half-open door so he can continue listening.

“I'm serious Thomas.” The room goes quiet and Pat is almost afraid that the two of you know he's there and that’s why you've stopped talking. It's only when Thomas speaks encouragingly to you that he stops worrying about being caught.

“Go on my darling.”

“I remember when I was a kid I saw a shooting star on a camping trip to the lakes. My parents told me that I should make a wish and if no one else wished on that star then it would come true. Silly really, hundreds of people must have seen it, but when I wished and they told me it would come true I believed them.”

“And what did you wish for?”

“True love. It took a while, but I'm so glad you're my wish come true.”

“Your words put my poetry to shame my love.”

It's only when Pat hears a noise from somewhere in the house that he comes back to himself. He bolts away from the room, heading to where most of the other ghosts had congregated for Lady Button's etiquette lesson. Even Allison had joined for this lesson, mainly because Kitty refused to leave her alone about it. In his mind, Pat has an eloquent way of explaining what he's just found out but it all goes out the window as soon as everyone's eyes are on him.

“Thomas and (Y/N) are dating!” The room explodes into a series of confused and surprised exclamations, with only two ghosts remaining silent. Allison is the only person to notice that the politician sitting across from her has not changed his facial expression since before Pat ran in. If anything, Julian almost seemed bored by the revelation.

“Julian, you don't look surprised?” The ghost in question crosses his arms across his chest, leaning back against the couch he's resting on.

“Well they've been pretty obvious about it, if you ask me. I worked it out months ago.” The politician's expression settles into a smug smile as finishes speaking. Alison can't resist the urge to roll her eyes at his smugness, not all that surprised that he’s kept the information to himself. She doesn’t doubt that he’s used that information for personal gain either.

The other ghost that remained silent has still not spoken. Alison knows how close you and the Captain are, so it's more surprising that he hasn’t reacted to the idea of you secretly dating one of the other ghosts right under his nose.

“Cap?” The ghost in question seems to come back to himself at Alison’s gentle prodding, straightening up and clearing his throat. A hush falls over the room as the Captain speaks.

“He came to me about a year ago asking me for my blessing for him to begin dating (Y/N). Said it wouldn't feel right if he didn't ask the closest thing she has to a father figure. I of course said yes once he made his intentions clear, and they seem to be very happy.” At the news of the couple receiving the Captain’s blessing, most of the other ghosts seem to settle into the news, murmuring compliments about the two ghosts.

“I always thought they’d be sweet together. Just thought Thomas was too reserved to ever make a move.” Julian laughs at that, redirecting the attention of everyone in the room back to him.

“He looks at her like she hung the bloody moon. I dread to think of how much poetry he’s written about her.” Alison lets out an involuntary groan at the idea.

“As long as he doesn’t subject us to it at his next poetry lesson he can be as poetic as he wants.”

In the days that follow it becomes apparent to all the residents of Button House just how in love the newly revealed couple are. The most surprising thing to them is how it took them all so long to notice. Subtlety is not in Thomas’ nature, and Julian was correct in saying that he looks at his partner like she hung the moon. It’s sweet really, and the others make sure to start giving you space to be alone together.

[joohanisms]

hi lizzie! i already know you by your main, i wanted to ask you some oneshots/thoughts about sex with jealous jiseok?

MY MAIN ?@?@@? was it from the obnoxious amount of likes i leave on every single work on the xdh tags LMAO thank you so much for the request <33 hope you like it

jealous jiseok thoughts 💭💫

cw: jealousy obv, oral (fem receiving), possessive tones, unprotected sex (on birth control. don't be dumb), cum play slightly wc: 1,1k

minors dni

jiseok doesn't strike me to be the type to get jealous easily But! once he does... oh no

let's say you're out somewhere, like a party. and he's going about the looks people shoot you the usual way: smirking back at people, all smug, as if he's saying "this is Mine <3 look at me having someone you'll never have"

he did not expect your own friend to hit on you though

they were always a little touchy, and jiseok's not usually bothered (hell, he's not even in a place to be bothered. his friends are hanging off his shoulders half the time – if it doesn't bother you, it shouldn't bother him)

but tonight they were too affectionate

it started with them casually touching you while you talked, then they started playing with your fingers and fixing your hair and now jiseok's threat radar is beeping

when they lean in to talk into your ear, he draws the line. he's intervening

he gets closer and hears the "come on, leave with me. he doesn't have to know" in the air

oh no. oh nononono

he's PISSED. not only are they flirting with you in front of him, they're also blatantly asking you to cheat?

you can barely begin to indignantly refuse as he wraps his arm around your shoulders, ignores the so called friend and goes "hey, babe." before he presses a kiss that lasts a second too long to your lips

"do you want to go home? i think we'd have a better time there than here," pointedly looks at the person in front of you and pulls you closer, "plus i really want to find out what's the surprise you said you have for me back home."

there's no surprise. he's only making a point. you don't think you're even wearing matching underwear

he didn't even wait for your friend to say anything – as soon as you open your mouth to agree, he's whisking you away (he Does look back to see their face though)

when you're finally met with the fresh night air outside the building, jiseok pulls his phone out to call you both a cab and starts his angry rant

"are they out of their mind? doing that when i'm a few feet away? trying to get you to fuck them when they know damn well you're taken! we're not seeing that asshole ever again, they should feel lucky i didn't punch their teeth right off, if i was the slightest bit crazier i would've–"

"jiseokie," a hand to his cheek, "are you jealous?"

he looks up from his phone to find your playful gaze. he huffed, "of course i am! who do they think they are–" he's cut off by a searing kiss to his lips.

"it's kind of hot."

the way you were looking at him... hell he could fuck you right then and there and even hope your stupid friend catches you. unfortunately, the cab is here and the poor driver shouldn't be subjected to seeing that

the second you arrive at your apartment, he's holding your face with both his hands and kissing you downright filthily in your little entrance hall

you need to take your shoes off though... that's not a problem at all – you hear his chunky sneakers be tossed to the ground while he keeps kissing you the best he can, and you only separate as he crouches down to unlace your boots for you

you can barely appreciate the view of your boyfriend at your feet before your boots are off and he's on you again

his lips attach to your neck, sucking and nipping on the flesh while his hands sneak under your shirt

he has half a mind to bend you over the couch and fuck you stupid until your moans are engraved on the couch, but he ultimately decides on pulling you into your bedroom

before you even get to the bed, you're shirtless, jiseok's hands fumbling with the clasps of your bra while you work on his jeans

you don't get very far before your knees hit the bed and you're falling backwards

your hair fawning around your face, your cheeks flushed, your lips kiss-bitten, your bra half-off, your eyes nearly desperate... jiseok is so glad he's the only one who gets to see you like this

(and if it's up to him he'll be the only one to see you like this for the rest of time <3)

but for now he'll just push your skirt up and pull your underwear down <3

and eats you out sooooo good like legs over his shoulders his fingers spreading you

after you cum, you try to repay the favor but he grabs your hands and goes "wanna cum inside you, baby, please"

and who are you to deny him !! it's not common to have him cum in you even though you're on birth control... my guy likes the visual of his cum on your skin

and so in a second his pants and underwear are off, your legs are around his hips and he's ruining your neck again while he guides his cock to your entrance

he pushes in bit by bit, and only when he bottoms out he detaches from your neck and grins, pressing the pads of his fingers into what you assume are the hickeys he left

"you're mine", he softly says, looking into your eyes, before he starts thrusting into you

it gets really fast and rough really quick

you can't help but moan a little too loudly, the way his hips are slamming into your thighs feels divine. and when he presses his thumb to your clit...... you're seeing stars wtf

he's kissing you desperately, in a mix of panting and actually kissing you properly. your arms wind around his neck, needing him closer while you feel a familiar wave of pleasure starting to come over you

what really does it for you is his little rushed whisper of "mine, mine, mine, you're only mine right baby? mine to fuck you like this, mine to ruin, mine"

he keeps mumbling possessives and filth while he fucks you through your high

"'m yours, ji– only yours," you manage to say through the fog in your brain, and you feel his release fill your cunt

when he finally stops grinding into you, prolonging his orgasm as much as he could, he'll pull out slowly so he can watch his cum drip out of your hole

scoops a little bit of it with his fingers and smears it on your cheek, kissing you deeply afterwards

"my baby," he whispers between kisses, "only mine."

when both of you have finally caught your breaths, jiseok gets up to fetch a towel to wipe you down

when he comes back, he cleans you thoroughly - except the cum smeared on your cheek

"you forgot something." you point to your sticky cheek.

he grins devilishly, straddling you. "that's for you to wear, babe. so everyone knows you're mine."

bonus: when you're cuddling later, ready to sleep, you remember something: "... so what was the surprise i had for you back here?"

"shut up and go to sleep."

[thesamoanqueen]

Blackwater XIII

Raiting: 18+

Warnings: drama, angst.

A/N: since things were going well on one side, they couldn't go well on the other. Life lessons~

She had taken off her dress like a soldier takes off his armour. She hadn't actually fought, maybe only for a few minutes and with words, not with claws and fangs, but she couldn't really complain. Mate or not, she was the stranger and even though she had never been in that role before, she guessed it was normal to have questions about her. On the other hand, it hadn't lasted long, they had lowered their guard before Roman arrive, without saying a word about the trial and Y/N found herself spending the whole lunch between stories of when he was a kid, future meetings and lobsters that disappeared from the table with bottles of wine. It had been nice, putting her in a good mood, but the tension remained until they returned home, just the two of them.

We did it.

She had never cared what people thought of her. Those had always been just wrong opinions and she had done everything to stay as far away as possible from everything and everyone, but now it was different. She had a reason to prove who she was, a million reasons to stay, to build something and even if she had to step out of her comfort zone, it hadn't been bad. Or at least that had been her impression until she returned downstairs, joining Roman who instead didn't seem to want to move from the deckchair by the pool where he had gone to sit.

- I thought it did well - she admitted, accepting his hand when he turned to look at her, a quick and brief smile seeing her with one of his hoodie on.

Something was occupying his head, Y/N could feel it too throught the bond without having to physically feel the tension of his muscles under clothes, as she caressed the back of his neck to calm him.

Maybe they don't-

- It's like that, they both love you – he reassured her, his big brown eyes now looking at her honest smile.

- I like them too... they're amazing.

They really had been with her. His mama had even hugged her when they said goodbye – even though Y/N had risked a paralysis upon contact – and his father, so intimidating at first, had insisted on setting up another meeting after she had offered to accompany him on a fishing trip. He hugged her. They were cute, reminding her of the times when she was a daughter too, she liked them and it was truly more than she ever imagined she could have in her future. A real family.

Lulled by that sensation, Y/N softened against him, his big hand moving lazily on her thigh until it stopped to draw circles on her caramel skin, eyes focused on that point with a serious look.

- You didn't ask why I was late – he mused and Y/N lowered her shoulders with a heavy breath.

So all his thoughts were born from her meeting with the mayor, document dealer, whoever was that man who had tried to speak the voice of authority with her and Solo that morning?

- I did everyone a favor, trust me, whatever Paul says

- Pearce doesn't matter – Roman cut short and Y/N turned to look at him.

If he wasn't late for that appointment, then what?

- I chose to listen to you about my cousins.

Y/N found herself smiling before even nodding.

The informations she had about the border were not so many. Roman avoided talking about it if she was around, much like he had avoided talking about the trial and she had resigned herself to his attempts to keep her away from certain matters, but she knew enough. Whatever loss the twins and therefore the entire Bloodline had suffered, didn’t justify the vibe between them and Roman. She had arrived there seeing them bond like the family they were and now they didn't even speak to each others. It shouldn't have been this way, it didn't really matter what happened and what impact it had, they were still standing, they could still be together, rebuild, start again and that was all that mattered. If she still had some of her family, she wouldn't have to go through everything that happened to her after, they were lucky to still be there for each other and she was happy that Roman decided to make that effort for everyone.

She knew he didn't want to. She felt it. But that step would have been good for everyone, including him.

- It will mean a lot to them – she reminded him, caressing the back of his neck once again.

He didn't move though, his eyes still trained on her, the same expression as he stared at her.

- What's up? – she asked – no jokes about you listening to me. I'm happy you decided to do it

- You're happy for them

- I'm happy for everyone

For them, for him, what was the difference? From what she knew, solving that problem at the border would improve the situation for the entire family. And yes, they would finally stop spending weeks outside trying to fix things, they would start again and so for him, finding himself with one less problem to deal with.

- I'll have to go there, is this okay too? – he asked again and Y/N let her hand slip away.

She hadn't been with him during other fights, but she knew what was out there. She had also gotten her hands dirty in very bad situations and she hadn't thought for a single second that it would be easy, but she was sure that he could do it. Roman was the alpha with the largest territory ever seen in that country for decades, no one had done what he did, he was strong and any obstacle they would put in front of him he could handle it. He had a pack that everyone feared, now her too was there to watch his back, he had nothing to worry about even looking at the situation with all the caution possible.

-You will not be alone, you are never alone – she noted with a glance and Roman tensed.

- It will become my responsibility.

- It doesn't have to, we'll do it together if-

- You will stay here.

What?

What?

She had heard wrong. He hadn't said it. He couldn't have said that. She was his mate and at that moment it was impossible for him to leave her behind. They had to be together. He had managed to leave her alone in a room only after months, he still didn't allow her to go around without Solo or someone to supervise, it was physically impossible for him to move away from her and voluntarily decide to leave her there. And even though he didn't say it and Y/N never thought about it again, she knew that Roman was terrified of losing her or that she might leave. Going away without her, walking away from her when he hadn't even marked her... was out of any discussion. He-… he couldn't be serious.

But as absurd as the possibility seemed, Roman also seemed equally convinced, and her disbelief turned too quickly to offense.

Because it was unthinkable yes, but he was serious. He was leaving her behind.

- Why?! – she demanded to know, her gaze hardening as she watched him bob his head in an attempt to control himself.

- Y/N

- I swear if you say it's for my good-

- You'll stay here.

- No. I won't stay and wait and make dinner for you, I’ll be there too. I owe it to the boys and-

- Now stop! – he exploded with a growl and for a long moment Y/N felt his rage, his wolf, inside her head, as had already happened on the night of the trial.

His hand was threatening to leave a mark on her leg, but Roman released his grip as soon as her body began to feel uncomfortable, clenching his fist around nothing, his shoulders hunched and his gaze lowered. Y/N watched him inhale slowly, blood pumping through his veins and something heavy pressing down on his chest that she wasn't sure was simple annoyance at his rejection. There was more and her hand moved without even having to think, covering his to push him to look up again.

- I can help- she tried, but Roman silenced her before finishing.

- Then for once do what I tell you to do.

***

Jey had dragged him there, lets give him another chance he had said. They both knew how it would end, they had been playing that game since they were four and he always won, ignoring anyone who got in his way, but Jey believed in second chances. Even though they had passed the second one so long ago that they had lost count.

They had grown up like brothers, always together, under the same roof, eating at the same table, doing the same things, hanging out with the same people. They had shared more with Roman than they had with Solo, but he wasn't truly their brother and it was moments like this that showed it, always. When things got bad, you always had to think about Roman. When something needed to be done, it was for Roman. When someone had to take precedence, that someone was Roman. They had grown up together, but he knew he was different, he knew he had been chosen and he had taken advantage of it without remorse, without thinking twice, throwing them into the mud when they tried to take a step further.

He and Jey had earned everything. They had worked hard and done the impossible to get to where they were, but he had taken away the chance to that last step, to really reach him, to really be by his side or show him that he was not so special. By all means, even those that a brother would never use against you. Jey pretended otherwise, lowered his head, looked away and started from scratch every time, but that was too much.

Get up. Stop that.

His voice echoed in his head, begging, scolding him.

Hell, nah. He wouldn't have smiled and nodded to keep the circus going that time, he was tired. They were in this situation because of him, as always because Roman was involved and they had to support him. They had spent the last month at the border, toiling, fighting and now after being scolded, punished like kidz, he also had to accept being humiliated and deprived of what was rightfully his? Even what he had earned?! No way.

- We've got your back, Uce – Jey doubled the dose, positioning himself in front of him to shield him, when Roman turned to look from the car on which he was still holding his ass.

Why the hell his brother loved him so viscerally, Jimmy had never understood. They were a family, he loved Roman too despite everything, but Jey was on another level and had always turned against him in the worst way. He still remembered the day he'd seen Roman nearly split Jey’s head in half for that title of chief, the same day he'd choked him almost dead.

- The Wiseman will let you know what to do next – Roman interrupted, without shaking hands or greetings, rolling up the window again.

He watched him and Paul leave them there, Solo silently getting back into the car and Jey still standing in front of him, his weight shifting from one foot to the other, shoulders turning. Together they could stop him, make him see reason and give him a dose of reality if he didn't want to do it, but his brother was still not ready after all those years.

- He's taking what's belong to us – he exploded, not caring if they were far enough or not.

- We can't leave things as they’re, he's right-

- He's taking what's belong to us, you get it or not?! – he repeated again and Jey turned to look at him, his brow furrowed.

Those territories weren't just the Bloodline's, they were theirs. Of him and of his brother, they were their legacy, their future. They had lost them, they had ended up in the wrong hands, now they answered to others, but if they ended up under Roman's direct control... they could forget about them. For the rest of their days, because he wouldn't give them up.

- Solo will be there too.

- He will give him trash, as he has always done with us.

Silence. Yes…

They had already been there. They had learned over time, growing up, understanding. For Solo it was new, but Roman had already dragged him into his game and they both knew that he would not have reserved a different end for him, especially not now that he was creating something else for himself, not now that his future was the goal and not the one of the entire family. He would have taken everything, passing over anyone. Their offense was an excuse to take more.

He pulled the bag out of the closet near the entrance, throwing it in front of the door without even checking what was inside. He no longer even made the effort to pack his bags, he kept them ready just in case the great Tribal Chief decided to send them to clean up who knows what corner of his empire after a nap. He saw Naomi on the couch, crossing her arms, watching him kick a misplaced box and slam the door.

- Say it – he huffed exasperatedly, he knew that expression.

- Y/N said she would talk to him-

Talk, ha! That was funny!

- And you believed her? – another look. He knew that face too.

- Maybe she actually did and Jey is right.

He really hoped that was the case, because otherwise they would find out later but he wouldn't stand by and watch that time. He would have been ready for everyone.

***

He was alone, but the Wiseman's voice still echoed in his head through his earbuds, as if he had never left, as if Roman hadn't locked himself in the gym to release tension and avoid everyone.

His muscles were starting to pull, a sign that tiredness was setting in, but his legs still bent, his arms still holding the barbell on his shoulders, sweat running down his back soaking the shirt now stuck to his skin. He had to bear that burden, he had to bear his family, he had to bear the bullshit of his cousins and the looks they cast blaming his choices. Choices that he had made because of them and which now forced him to plan everything ten moves in advance, so as not to put at risk even what was currently far from the teeth of his enemies.

- They both know they'll have to stay on the second line while you're there - Heyman reported, as Roman forced another push-up and another.

He would cross the border again for the first time in months, but it was different now. Previously, the attempts of the outsiders were annoyances, not real problems. Before it had been like going hunting, playing with his prey and then getting it out of the way. Now they had ripped something away from him, they were throwing it in his face to humiliate him and even though he knew he would teach them a lesson, that he would take back what was rightfully his, he didn't have the slightest desire to put anything else at risk. No stray would have run away with a shred of what was his, that lesson had to be useful to everyone and ensure they would stay away from his land, his home, Y/N and their future.

- Is it clear? – he asked through clenched teeth, blood pumping, gaze fixed in front of him.

- Absolutely, my Tribal Chief. Everything will remain under control – Heyman quickly assured.

- Well, finish organizing everything and let me have the report tomorrow.

He didn't even wait for another answer, dropping the barbell to the floor with a thud to rip off the earbuds and catch his breath.

Without his voice in his head, the room was silent and for a long moment Roman remained there, taking advantage of that calm, of the peace that surrounded him. Everything seemed incredibly distant, there were no problems, nothing to conquer, no empire to defend, just an empty room and his heart slowly returning to beating normally. He looked distractedly at the clock on the wall, he had been down there for three hours, now it was even past dinner time.

With a heavy breath, he took a towel to dab the sweat on his neck and opened the door, stepping out to put an end to this voluntary withdrawal. In the house there were still some lights on and Roman followed them to the kitchen, surrounded by the same silence that had enveloped him as soon as he had finished talking to the wiseman and stopped training. The living room with its huge couches was tidy, not a cushion out of place and so was the dining room, with its vase of flower and all the chairs lined up. When he arrived in the kitchen only the lights under the forniture were on, the counter empty, but Y/N had placed a message on the fridge.

She had cooked the dinner for him.

“I won't wait and make you dinner!”

She had done it.

He narrowed his eyes, inhaling deeply.

No date just the two of them. They hadn't even had dinner together and even though he sensed she was around by their bond, he didn't even have any idea where she was or what she had done after the argument they had. They had spent the afternoon apart, him locked in the gym and her doing who knows what. But she had cooked dinner for him and in silence Roman warmed up the plate she had left, eating with no one beside him to talk and his gaze fixed beyond the window, from which he could see the edge of the forest.

We promised to take care of her.

He remembered it. It was a constant thought in his mind. A priority need that he was putting first on that occasion too, but it was difficult to explain, it was difficult for her to accept and he couldn't distract himself, not when now there was so much at risk for their future.

They will not screw this.

He finished eating alone, put the plate away alone and went back through the house alone, heading upstairs to at least get the sweat off him, since the weights on his shoulders remained. Up there the situation was no different, a few lights on along the hallway and silence again. When he reached the bedroom he almost expected not to see her, to start worrying that she was out in the middle of the night but instead there she was, with his hoodie still on, curled up in the corner of the bed with her back to him.

He stopped in the doorway to look at her, waiting for a reaction, a sign. Because he knew that she was angry and Roman had learned the hard way what happened when she was angry, for a whole month and instead nothing, not a movement, a word, a breath. He approached slowly, looking at her as he had done for hours, days, when she had just arrived and he could do nothing more.

- Y/N… – he called her softly, but Y/N didn't answer or move.

She had fallen asleep without him.

The thought of it made his mouth curl in annoyance, prompting him to turn and walk to the bathroom. He needed a shower, to burn himself and get rid of that terrible feeling that was sticking to his skin like an indelible stain.

***

She had slept in a corner, trying not to move, her body tense, ears open as hadn't happened for some time now. She had heard him return to their bedroom the night before covered in sweat, she had heard him call her, but she had been unable to answer and he had not even reached out his hand to touch her. He had spent the night like this too, in the opposite corner, far from her, without breathing her scent or holding her under his arm as he always did, until daylight broke and he disappeared for daily routine.

She was left wondering what had happened, curled up in the hoodie she had slept in, one of many of him that she had gotten into the habit of stealing because for some strange reason it made her feel better. But that time it hadn't worked, it hadn't been the same and Y/N had put it away to go on her run, but her run wasn't going as well as she should have either.

Why did it seem so difficult even when things were getting better? The problems at the border could be solved, the elders did not pressure him anymore, his parents were even happy that he had found her, and she tried to let go of old habits to build something together. Yet with every step they took, something else jumped out and a part of her was now starting to wonder if maybe she was seeing things wrong.

She stopped to smell the roots of one of the many trees that surrounded her, her almost reddish paws dug a small furrow at the edge of the path near the house. She recognized that smell, she didn't have to concentrate to know that he too had passed through there on his way back.

He had seemed so exasperated the day before, as if dealing with her was the point of no return and she had felt angry, frustrated and hurt. Y/N wanted to help, support him, she was trying to be what she was supposed to be, a good mate, yet it was quite clear that she wasn't doing that.

She went up the path, arriving at the empty back of the house and shifting only when she was in the garden. The house was quiet, lots of space and many empty rooms, but Y/N knew even without having to check that he was there and not out doing who knows what. They hadn't spoken since the day before, since the argument they had near the pool and quickly, Y/N crossed the living room, stopping just before the stairs, when her eyes fell on the bag next to the front door.

I don't like it.

When Roman turned to look at her, leaving the kitchen, his expression was impassive, but her wolf cried anyway even though she had just growled her disapproval of whatever he was doing and kept doing, after checking her with a glance.

Not a word. He hadn't even tried to get closer.

I don't like it!

- What are you doing? – she asked softly, ignoring the wolf voice in her head, while he placed who knows what inside the bag and got back on his feet.

- It's just a couple of changes.

He cannot leave us here!

He was actually doing it instead.

- ... are you already leaving? – she didn't think it would happen the next day, she thought it would take more time, a few days, that Paul would have to prepare things.

- We've left them running around for too long.

She nodded in silence, even though he had his back to her, evidently busy arranging what was necessary for that trip.

She had thought several times about the twins and all the time they had spent away from home in the last month, now it was his turn. He would have gone there in their place, crossed the border, met those who threatened them and it would not have been a peaceful encounter. It was necessary, indispensable for their family and she had asked him to do it first, but now a part of her couldn't think of anything other than how they were about to part ways for the first time since they had met.

- You can do it. I know you can – she said, swallowing a heavy breath.

Roman stood, silently with his back to her for a long moment until Y/N saw him turn again, slow and inexorable as always, to move towards her. A shiver ran through her body feeling him close to her again, sensing his true scent, his big brown eyes scanning her even before his hand rose to caress her face. Y/N felt his thumb rub over her soft cheek, graze her plump lips and move down her chin, hand covering her throat for a moment as he always did when he was deep inside her, then stopping at her weak spot near the shoulder and squeezing just enough to make her knees tremble.

- I’ll do it. Im not one of my cousins.

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