#this post gets so broken on desktop sorry

[horridcassette]

Do you have any photos of chipped tooth David?? That era is the cutest and i can find so few photos :((

It's only a few, but yes I do!

Also these gifs, and any performances from 76-77 of course, especially the kitchen show

[crimeronan]

hey there! i’m sorry, i genuinely have no idea how to do this and you posted about it, so i was wondering— if it’s not too much trouble, could you please explain how you back up your tumblr blog? i have like five blogs and idk how to save them anywhere😭

yes of course!! you're not the only person who just asked me this so don't worry. i think it's pretty important for us all to archive our tumblr blogs before the feature breaks in the future. this will give you a zip file that has copies of your original posts and reblogged media, as well as HTML logs of your DMs (and maybe asks, i'm not sure).

the feature is only available on a web browser so you're gonna have to get out your computer.

on the left side of the desktop screen, you'll see a menu. you want to click on settings:

it's here, specifically:

on the right-hand side of the settings page, you'll see a long menu. underneath you'll see "blogs."

scroll down to 'Blogs.' then click on the blog that you want to back up.

on your blog page, you're gonna scroll all the way down to the bottom. the bottom of the page should look like this:

you're gonna click on the button to export your blog. you can navigate away from the page while it's processing without losing your progress. when the export is complete, you'll receive an email:

^these are screenshots from when i archived my blog two years ago, the current archive is still processing for me.

and that's it!

the feature might already be broken for some people.... i know one of my partners has trouble using it. if it helps, i used google chrome for this. i know chrome is the devil but like, if you gotta then you gotta.

hope this helps!

[posarmeklen]

Don’t you hate when you turn your back for a minute at your dead-end copy job (sorry, dead-end desktop publishing job), and all of a sudden, one half of your sister’s cool teen quartet along with your horndog conspiracist friend are holding paper products (er, helping with a big job) and flapping their lips about the latter’s fairly new unplanned pregnancy?

It was just a coincidence that Goat swung by to visit Alex at Repro Man’s shortly after Fruity and Matt came in, and even though they had heard through Chaka (who, naturally, knew because of Alex) that the older man was in a “delicate” condition, it was their first time bumping into him in person since.

Hearing Fruity’s compliments, Matt turned around from the poster in his hands. “Oh, hey, Goat,” he greeted him.

“Hey, Matt, what’s up?”  

“Probably nothing compared to what’s up with you, right?”

“Yeah, I’ve been busy.” Goat coughed.

“Yeah, you know, my cousin just had a baby a couple months ago,” Matt offered up. “I’m not gonna lie, it wasn’t easy for her, but she said it was totally worth it. You know, yin and yang and all that.”

“Hey, I don’t think this situation calls for the poetry.” Fruity made a disapproving smacking sound with his lips.  “Man, can’t you just leave this beautiful thing be?” Goat smirked.

“Chill out, alright?” said Matt, gingerly transferring a large stack of paper from Fruity’s hands to his own and placing it by the copier. “I was just going to ask how he’s taking it.”

“Well,” Goat said emphatically. “Do you want the miracle-of-life Demi Moore Vanity Fair edition, or the cold unabridged truth?” His words conjured an image of himself, au naturel and assuming the pose of the actress, which subsequently splintered and fell away like a broken pane of glass.

“I wouldn’t expect anything less than the second one from you.” Matt smiled.

“Oh, it’s fuckin’ brutal,” he asserted. “Imagine the most head-splitting zombifying hangover, with none of the fun from the night before.”

Fruity raised his eyebrows. “None?”

“Oooh, rough…” Matt mumbled sympathetically.

“My back hurts all time. Everything’s sweaty. Plus, on top of that, I can’t really see my junk. It makes for a challenge when women’s volleyball is on and I wanna –”

“Alright, alright…” Matt’s laugh cut the description of his plight short. “I think we get the picture.”

“Hey, we’re all guys here!” grinned Fruity, giving an open-palmed shrug.

“I will say, it’s not a total loss,” Goat went on. “I seem to have unlocked a brand-new level of savoring life’s pleasures.”

“Oh, because you had trouble with that before, right?” teased Matt.

“Eh, I don’t know, but this baby must love Ring-Dings and Bud Light.”

“Hey, and at least the ladies eat up this stuff,” Fruity said. “You know, feeling the baby kick and comparing its size to a dill pickle and crap. They must be all over you.”

“Uh, yeah, yeah, right on.” Goat looked past him, letting out a sigh. “Is there a bathroom in this place? I gotta take a leak.”

“Yeah, right over by the back wall,” said Matt.

“I won’t keep you,” Fruity added, motioning in the general direction of the door.

So anyway, when it comes to Fruity’s comment re: the “fairer sex” and pregnancy, I would be remiss not to mention the kindred spirit Goat hit it off with, the child’s second parent (seen in my Downtown posts of yesteryear. However, I did change her name for some reason. Friendship ended with “Jackie”, “Kasey” is my best friend now). *clears my throat and shuffles flashcards* There came a point of awareness that despite their similarities, they were at really different life stages (Goat had been doing his own thing for years, but Kasey, a trans woman who was Goat’s age, had been living as herself for a fraction of that and was relishing her freedom) and while Goat initially hadn’t changed his lifestyle a bit to accommodate the pregnancy, she didn’t want to live like him forever and begrudged his seeming lack of trying. Words were exchanged, and the pair went their separate ways. Not to worry – they would soon rekindle, and both put forth effort to be healthier (in Goat’s case, he was mostly propelled by the knowledge of his physical condition; in Kasey’s, she was inspired to show a sort of solidarity with him, plus she would soon be a parent as well, despite not physically being pregnant).  But given their respective issues, neither swayed the other in a positive direction, and they soon reached the disappointing yet amicable conclusion that they were perhaps too alike to remain close. And in the midst of that, they just knew neither of them were cut out to raise children (what were we thinking?) – so wish granted for a lucky adoptive parent(s). But I digress… I wonder if some of this diverted him from regaling Fruity and Matt with salacious tales when given the opportunity.

Also, by the way? Even though Fruity was being facetious in my picture and Goat wouldn’t name his offspring after himself, he and the aforementioned second parent did discover at an ultrasound (the first and only; Goat completely forgot about an appointment scheduled earlier in the pregnancy 😑) that the fetus was male. Goat after he and Kasey exchanged an overwhelmed glance and muttered fragmented agreeable noises upon being asked if they were interested in finding out the baby’s sex today: “Rock on! Built-in apprentice and wingman, here I come…” *medical technician politely chuckling intensifies*

[1dmonthlyficroundup]

Hii just wanted to confirm if my post was submitted for the fic bouncing if the wall. I tried submitting it for September round up but I kept getting this message

And today also I got the same pop up, can you help me out if I'm missing something while submitting the post

Hi, so sorry about this! I put out a post about the issues, but I knew not everyone would end up seeing it. It took me a bit to figure out what seemed to be happening, and it looks like submissions still work for the blog on desktop but not on mobile/app. I sent in a support ticket to Tumblr and their answer was basically..."oh yeah that's broken. lol."

So in order to submit you'll have to either submit on desktop, send an ask to the blog, or feel free to dm me at my main which is @allwaswell16 . I'm going to change the "how to submit" post at the beginning of October so hopefully other people will end up seeing it for next month's roundup.

So please feel free to submit whatever fic(s) didn't get through last month for October.

I'm going to answer this publicly, I hope that's okay! Just in case anyone else had the same issue! I'm sure some people did!

[labrador-entity]

Hi there! I know that this is really out of the blue but im asking for a favor or some help w/ my cats current medical needs. Please if you have an extra time to boost/share it for us so that we could get some traction or it could reach more people, it would definitely help a ton! I understand if its not okay, Im so sorry for taking some of your time and I wish you to be safe and healthy always, xx.(Please considering answering my ask privately or probably hit me a msg if its fine! 😭🙏

This acc is sketchy as all hell. The post links to a paypal instead of a legit fundraising site under a pretty shoddy excuse, All posts were reblogged from the original poster - probably easily found on the trending page, and almost all were reblogged in the same hour that the donation post was written (19 hours ago). Looks like a scam to me babes! If i was on desktop i might reverse-search the images in the post.

ALSO Also on having a little look, the bill says "MALE NEUTERED" but "Bacon" is referred to as "she" throughout the post, AND it says "lumps biopsy" at the top while the post refers to a broken femur, so honestly I don't think i even need to reverse search at all. Blatant scam. I'm off to report the account and post, and share this post with all the people who have reblogged the donations post. If you don't know somebody asking for money, always do a bit of homework before considering sharing their request!

[fagdykevash]

Hello! Sorry to bother you, but you are the only blog I know who makes IDs outside of their own stuff so I figured you were the best person to ask. Do you have by any chance ressources to learn how to make and practice them? I want to start using them but I'm not a native speaker and I'm kinda struggling ^^'

Thank you and have a nice day!

oh ofc!! if u want, i have some good posts in the #image descriptions tag on my blog, but i'll link some stuff here too :D

Why and how, basics

Quick tips and tricks

Describing comics

Describing videos

Image Description Guidelines

and a couple of my own tips !!

a great rule of thumb is, "the more time someone would look at an image, the longer + more detailed the description should be". This means, if it's a little doodle or a meme, u don't have to spend hoursss describing every little thing (ie, the clothes ppl are wearing, the lighting, that typa thing -- unlessss it's like,, part of the joke/meme. does that make sense ?) this post by mothfishing [hyperlinked] explains it SO much better than i ever could

on that note, a short/""bad"" id is always better than none at all!! don't worry too much abt the quality, or else you'll get stuck in a loop of fixing and editing and the description will never be published (or is that just me lol)

an absolute lifesaver for me was using a text-to-speech/screen reader to read my descriptions back to me ! especially if it were a longer piece, i would write an id, turn on the screenreader + close my eyes, then see if i missed anything important + if i needed to rephrase anything.

for practicing:

if you see an image w/ a description, try to write one yourself for that image. then just check between those ! it's bound to be different, but how? try to figure out which fits the image better, then adapt !

whenever i'm bored/have nothing to do, i try to describe things in the room. this is mostly just a fun little game to keep my brain busy, but it's also helpful in building skills !

if i can, i like to read out my description to a friend/family member if they're around. i ask them to imagine what i describe, then i show them the image to see if it matches. getting other people's input is always v v helpful... and speaking of....

the people's accessibility discord server!!!!!! i cannot emphasize enough how cool and nice everyone is there !!!!! u can ask for help describing something, ask ppl to double check ur work, or just send an image for ppl to describe!! literally everyone there is just so wonderful and helpful :3 here's an invite link!

little things that i learned:

the screenreader on my phone reads quotes without pause. so it would read "a sentence just like this" as if the quotes weren't there. so i picked up the habit of putting a comma before the quote to break the sentence up. so saying "this" sounds much more different then saying, "this".

(desktop only i think) it's much better for a screen reader to read line breaks (holding shift and enter) than just paragraph breaks (just enter). with paragraph breaks, the person using the screen reader would have to tap on each new paragraph to read it, which can be a hassle. with line breaks, the screen reader just reads the next bit automatically, but the ID is still visually broken up.

save stuff to ur drafts to look over later !

for text-heavy images, use a OCR/image-to-text extractor. just put the image in and copy the text it spits out, maybe looking over it to make sure there aren't any mistakes. this definitely removes a lot of the burden of copying text painstakingly by hand yk

i'm sure there must be more i'm forgetting, so if any of my followers want to leave any more tips in the notes i'd greatly appreciate it :D

[zwoelffarben]

what's going on with the coleslaw? im confused

So, back in June-ish I made a comment in a voice call with friends that someone should add probiotics to their diet, and listed two examples: yogurt and coleslaw.

The call then took the piss about it as they often do, resulting in the creation of The "'Coleslaw' 'Shitposting' 'and' 'Torture' 'Chamber' 'Society'", a discord group chat dedicated to negging on coleslaw.

The ninja sex party music video No Reason Boner recently came to my attention, and I posted a clip of, "No reason boner| no reason boner| I like coleslaw but not that much | No reason boner," to the chat.

It just got a response, so I figure I'll put more memes in, but I'm browsing tumblr on my laptop right now, which... about 20% of inputs into it are broken including the secondary mouse click I'd need to copy images, so I'm reblogging them on tumblr (making it y'alls' problem) while I decide if I want to get out of bed and walk two feet to my desktop to post them properly or roll back over and go to sleep as dawn's tendrel reach my eyes through my bedroom's south-facing window.

Sorry about the confusion.

[maglors-anion-gap]

(@cosmic-walkers so sorry for the late reply - work was very busy this week. Posting our thread as a new post because I feel bad gumming yours up with a bunch of reblogs. RIP to everyone's dash tho, the ADHD is leaping out and this post will not be short.)

Note: the text in all the images has been copied into the image description function on desktop. let me know if for some reason it can't be accessed.

Anyway, cosmic-walkers and I had a really good exchange about maeglin and his treatment in text that got me thinking again about eol and the difficulties I've had engaging with his narrative even after coming around to a more nuanced.

I mentioned this in my tags and asked how folks go about repairing eol's narrative:

And I got a really thoughtful reply that, with permission, I'm sharing here so that more people can see it. Hopefully it is as interesting to you all as it was to me. (browse images right to left, top to bottom. comments organized in vertical order in each image).

Thank you @cosmic-walkers for taking the time to write that out for me. It absolutely makes sense, and I actually really love getting long messages because I feel like the length constraints of both tags and comments hinder free conversation.

Thank you @cosmic-walkers for taking the time to write that out for me. It absolutely makes sense, and I actually really love getting long messages because I feel like the length constraints of both tags and comments hinder free conversation.

I have a degree in public health, and my focus was interpersonal and family violence; I don't bring it up to toot my own horn, but rather to offer some context for readers here and to draw from as I analyze the patterns of behavior in the narrative.  For what its worth, I think that more nuanced readings of eol's character line up pretty well with frameworks for understanding unhealthy relationships, abusive relationships, and family violence.

I think it makes people uncomfortable to engage with the idea that abusers are humans.  I don't mean that people ought to feel a preponderance of sympathy for them (at the expense of their victims), but rather that humans have human triggers, motivations, and psychologies.  Of course, we are talking about elves, but *vague hand waving.*  I joke that my degree was the most expensive, circuitous way to get therapy, but it really did help to engage with concepts like family systems theory to understand my own life and move forward in healing past "that sucked and my abuser is a monster .... who somehow manages to treat everyone else well... why me?"

Family systems theory posits that abuse can arise in certain dynamics and be conducted by people who, in other dynamics, would not act abusively.  It asks us to describe both the overarching family system as well as the subsystems that exist between different members.  Noise in one subsystem echoes to impact the rest of the system.  It emphasizes the impact of boundaries (divisions, openness or isolation, emotional closeness), roles (patterns of behavior, and who may be targeted/blamed/scapegoated), rules (spoken and unspoken standards, traditions, and guidelines), and hierarchy (power, who holds it, respect and lack thereof).  People chafe against the the last concept, feedback and circular causality, because when applied incorrectly it can sound like the victims are provoking their own abuse - this is not true, and it should not be applied like this.  It only means that a relationship yields certain behaviors depending on its climate, and that once a pattern of behavior is established it becomes harder to break. 

When analyzing family systems theory, many people choose to pair it with the family resilience model, which prioritizes repairing the broken aspects of (sub)system relationships, hilighing positive characteristics and using them as strengths to propel other behavior change, and promoting flexibility, openness, and equitability of social and economic resources to stabilize (sub)systems to begin the healing process.  Of course, not everyone wishes to remain in contact with their abuser.  Of my two abusers, one I have cut contact with and the other I now have a healthy relationship with.  But, utilizing models and evidence based practice like this is critical to actually understanding and then remediating abuse and its damage.   

Edit 1/1/23: I forgot to mention the impact of stress on abuse. Many abusers release their stress, confusion, and concerns in the form of abuse because they don’t have another way to process and positively direct those emotions. This can be caused by lack of emotional intelligence or ability to self regulate and soothe, lacking interpersonal communication skills, poor modeling from their own role models. I’ve written evidence-based program plans for mitigating teen dating violence, and to make an impact you have to far in advance of the common age of onset of dating violence. We should be teaching stress management tools, emotional regulation, communication skills, and bodily autonomy is late primary and early elementary school. But many people connect dating violence and sex in their minds and don’t want to talk about it with kids. In reality, a lot of abuse happens because of disregulation, not because of inappropriate desire. This is compounded in real life by theories of power and hierarchical respect - if people feel like someone is of higher value than them, they treat them respectfully, but if they feel like they are the person of higher value, they feel it is within their rights (and perhaps a just affirmation/ defense of system hierarchy) to treat them as they please.

I bring all this up because after reading your comments, I tried using it to analyze the system of Eol, Aredhel, and Maeglin, and the subsystems between them.  We agree that as a whole, their family system is tense, unequal, and prone to violence (not necessarily the physical kind). Edit 1/1/23: everyone in the family is experiencing stressors, including Eol himself. The way he responds to these stressors is not healthy and has an impact on the subsystems of their family.

The subsystem of Aredhel and Maeglin is the easiest to analyze in some ways, and there's a wealth of knowledge to pick over.  The two of them are emotionally close, open with each other, ally with each other (as in, we do not canonically see either of them display pecking order behavior in which one abuse victim then abuses someone less powerful in another subsystem), and seem to have similar power distance (aredhel is his mother, but she is not characterized as being domineering toward him, and has about as much systemic power as maeglin in comparison to eol, though eol treats maeglin worse initially, forming a subsystem I discuss next).  

Eol and Maeglin form a fractious subsystem.  It is characterized by high power distance, emotional isolation (see: not naming Maeglin until he was far along in childhood), and Eol regards him more as a possession than as someone worthy of his respect and basic dignity (see: the attempted murder).  Resources is a more uniquely human concept, but Eol is the lord of Nan Elmoth, he exerts some control over the forest, he maintains his own staff and people, and he has the ability to forbid (and enforce) certain behaviors.  Maeglin spends more time with his mother than father (out of the house too, if memory serves, though this may not be so odd for elves) and dreams of running away to Gondolin, and it seems to me that Aredhel's tales of Gondolin (ironically, a city-prison of another sort) are so sweet to him because of his current family situation.  

Aredhel and Eol form the third and final subsystem.  I think it is important to note here that many, if not most, abusive relationships begin well.  At baseline, many abusers are adept at concealing red flag behaviors until they successfully lock down their victim.  But I am more interested in exploring the family systems model of abuse here (Eol is often analyzed using the characteristics of a serial abuser, and while some people fit that model, in combination with the terrible handling of race and culture in this arc, brute caricatures, and white damsels, I think it does more to reinforce an over-done reading that leans into rather than away from Tolkien's biases).  

As you so rightly mention, Aredhel and Eol begin their relationship with a certain degree of love.  We can see some differences in power, agency, and respect from the start - I am reminded of Eol enchanting the woods to draw Aredhel in.  However, this is a storytelling device common to fairy tales, even ones intended to be read romantically, and because I am a huge lover of the Ballad of Tam Lin I must be honest with myself and admit that this alone can be taken as a stylistic choice and not an indicator of purely evil intentions.  

The difference in power only grows as Eol forbids Aredhel to visit the lands of the Noldor; this puts her in a difficult bind, as she is also not welcome in the largest kingdom of the Sindar.  In general, controlling someone's movements indicates a paternalism and lack of respect that it's difficult to build a healthy relationship on.  Now, initially they do go about exploring together, and I think this is something that would have endeared Eol to Aredhel, something she would have enjoyed, something they could have found common ground in, and something that perhaps reminded her of old friends like Celegorm.  As their relationship degrades, we see mentions of that closeness, emotional openness, and equity of station disappear.  Now Eol goes about his business, Aredhel concerns herself with their son, and they wait until Eol is gone to flee.

On the topic of why people agree to the demands of abusive or otherwise toxic partners, when interviewed many people say that they would like to stay with their partner but that they just want the abuse/hurtful behavior to stop.  Now, it's not always possible to achieve that, but many people love their abusers. They make excuses to themselves, their families, and to the medical and legal system to protect them.  We cannot discount the impact fear, threats, isolation, and lack of resources have on this behavior, but it would be wrong to dismiss the emotional attachment many people feel.  I believe this is a valid reason why Aredhel would initially entertain Eol's demand that she not travel in noldor lands (additionally, she has only had experience with her brother at this point, and Turgon eventually relented and let her go, so perhaps she thinks she can eventually wear Eol down into relaxing his restrictions).  It would also explain why she pleads twice to save Eol's life. 

Now, I think their relationship, even before Maeglin was (lovingly) conceived, was poised to fall apart.  Eol cannot get past his opinions of the noldor, and while those opinions are not incorrect and are, on their own, valid to hold, he marries a noldor woman and has a half-noldor child with her.  I think a certain lack of trust in Aredhel, and lack of respect for her cultural background, lays the foundation for his abuse of their son.  I read some excellent meta recently about the functional impact of the Quenya ban, and the writer posed that by banning Quenya, the language and culture was associated with kinslayers - thusly, anyone who wanted to participate in political life in Beleriand (which required peace and intergroup co-operation) would have to disavow not just the kinslayings (despite being overwhelmingly kinslayers themselves) but also there heritage.  I can see this kind of mentality come out strongly in Eol's treatment of Maeglin: he is concerned that Aredhel teaching Maeglin about her family is like a poison to him, that any faith he has in his wife's good nature or his own ability to parent effectively and teach Maeglin about his own culture is overwhelmed by the canker of noldorin culture.  

I think this further corroborates your claim that their relationship slowly degrades from good to bad, because I don't think Aredhel would have tolerated that initially, and if we follow LaCE I'm not sure conceiving Maeglin would be possible with the degree of animosity we see toward the end of their relationship.  But I might push a little on the idea that the relationship between Aredhel and Eol was healthy up until the birth of Maeglin.  I think the introduction of Maeglin to the family, the creation of two new subsystems, the shift and echo of power within the system, all combine to catalyze abuse.  But a loving relationship does not equal a healthy relationship, and loving and being loved by someone does not mean that you have a true, deep respect for each other.  It is fully possible to be in love with someone, care deeply about them - and be unable to relate meaningfully to them, or understand their fears or needs. This is how I perceive Aredhel and Eol's relationship almost up until the moment she flees from him.

Now I have some loose end thoughts.  Regarding the impact of Eol's parenting on Maeglin, there is some interesting research on chronic fear in children that I refer to now.  Chronic (prolonged, or recurring) fear in children causes a host of acute and chronic issues later, both physiological and psychological.  Blood sugar, stress hormone levels, sleep health, capacity for and strength of emotional attachment, attention span, short and long term memory, sociability and antisocial behaviors, and rage are all negatively impacted by experiencing chronic fear.  Fear is a word that has certain connotations in people's minds, but in this context it can mean anything from living in a war zone, to experiencing abuse, to being bullied or growing up being discriminated against for any reason, to being food or housing insecure, to being routinely disciplined in an illogical/punitive manner.  Not all sources of fear are imminent physical threats (there is a reason it is a separate and unique felony crime, for example, for a child to witness abuse taking place even if the child is technically safe).  

So we can look at all this and apply this to how we think Maeglin thinks, feels, and interacts with the world considering his poor relationship with his father, the disintegrating relationship between his father and mother, his introduction to gondolin (and losing both parents), and then the discrimination he faces within Gondolin.  He moves from one system of fear to another system of fear, and the irony is that his father couldn't stand him for his mother's heritage and the Gondolindhrim judge him for his father's.  I think in some ways, Nan Elmoth and Gondolin are reflections of each other, and what happens when xenophobia, isolationism, and fear come into play.

Something else that came to mind while writing was that different groups of Sindar view the Noldor differently. Doriath views them as a challenger to the rule of Beleriand, and this is evident in how Thingol speaks of his kingship and the laws he makes.  Some Sindar go with Turgon to Gondolin - though the ruling class, and the historians like Penlodh are all Noldor, so while Maeglin was not entirely alone in Gondolin, he still was not truly free, and the historical record after his death is most definitely biased.  the Sindar in the north see the Noldor as allies - though again, similarly to the Sindar that took Turgon as their Lord, or the Edain immediately swearing to elvish Lords, I see Tolkien's bias and racial hierarchy creeping in here to determine "logical" progressions of events.  I think all of this contributes to a very tense environment in Beleriand, between the noldor and the sindar, between different groups of sindar, etc etc, and different groups would likely have different fears/reactions to the Noldor.  I think Eol was poised, with his cultural trauma, for his marriage to fail.  And he is mentioned in connection to Thingol, not Círdan, so his cultural and political context comes into play here.  Additionally, we have no idea how old he is.  Thingol (and Círdan too iirc) is old enough to remember the Teleri that left for Valinor; this is speculation, but Eol could be as well, which would at least contextualize his intense reaction to the kinslayings as an even more personal grief. 

This was a very long free-form way of processing what I think about Eol, and I think I can safely say I find him more interesting as a character now.  I really wanted to like him! I tried so hard! I can find something to like about almost every character in the legendarium (even if it's just a "wow that is such an interesting/stimulating way to build characterization").  And I think I can do that with Eol now.  I think there's so much to explore re: Nan Elmoth, his skill as a smith, and his relationship with the dwarves.  

I actually think it was you that posted about Feanor and Eol being similar, and the thought crossed my mind again as I was writing this up, firstly because of their similar passions, but also because I think they respond to stress, fear, and grief in a similar way.  Neither of them handle it well, and they take it out on the people around them.  In fact, I think it's great to contrast these two.  On the one hand, we have Feanor, grieving his mother, his father, the last bit of stability in Valinor, and feeling like he doesn't belong in that society, that he's tainted, and that everyone secretly hates him (Morgoth's brain worms aren't helping).  On the other hand, we have Eol, who is grieving the murder of his kinsfolk, and who views the arrival of the noldor as the colonization and the potential obliteration of his people (a valid fear to have, and corroborated by those princes of the noldor who cross the sea not to fight Morgoth but to obtain kingdoms of their own).  And of course, the threat of imprisonment in Gondolin for life is the last straw, and very important in my mind when considering what Eol does next.  

It just came to mind, but you could perhaps draw a parallel between Eol trying to kill Maeglin as a perverse mercy killing to spare him the pain of being an outcast in Gondolin, and Denethor trying to burn himself and Faramir alive to prevent their remains from falling into the hands of the Enemy.  Eol has a certain love for his son, and unfortunately it's the killing kind.  

Again, I really appreciate you taking the time to talk with me, and I'm in agreement with you!  It was really helpful to hear your thoughts.  In a way, it was kind of freeing to hear you say Eol was kind of crap?  The last conversation I had (years ago) with someone about Eol and transformative works, I got the distinct sense that they thought anything less than a fully exculpatory reading of Eol (and reworking the narrative to place the blame of Aredhel's death on "an accident" or "getting between Turgon's men and Eol") was not good enough to repair the narrative.  And don't get me wrong! I actually really enjoy AUs and canon divergence, and this arc is no exception!  

But sometimes I like to stick closer to canon, and pick apart the biases in the narrative and how they're impacting the characters, especially in an arc that is tied so closely to those characters.  I had a pretty firm grasp of the biases at play, but I didn't have as good a handle on the dynamic between Eol and Aredhel and that really tripped me up when I considered possible adaptations to their arc.

My final thought is that I hate having the only character of XYZ background be the villain.  I think the way I can potentially get around that is that because it's easier to repair Maeglin's narrative, it's easy for me to make Maeglin sympathetic.  As you said, Eol is sympathetic, and nuanced, but also kind of a shitty guy.  Whereas Maeglin is sympathetic, nuanced, does some things are are Not Well Adjusted, but also imminently likable once the narrative biases are stripped away.  Most of Maeglin's "Crimes" in the narrative are like "he was in love with his cousin, but he was respectful and didn't say anything about it, but she was a mindreader and found out anyway," and "wow he's so close to the king, that's suspicious (even though they're blood related and that's not a red flag at all)" and "he gave up the city ... to gain his cousin as a prize ... but he was tortured first,  so maybe it was the torture that really sealed the deal, not the cousin-loving?"  Sorry, abrupt departure from academic language into dark humor.  But yeah.  Fully fleshing out both of these characters - and maybe including some of the sindar of Gondolin and Nan Elmoth as OC's even? - is maybe the way to go.

[alltimefail-sims]

Hello I got an answer from the EA team and I didn’t read It correctly the first time. I’ve got banned because of 4 problematic Sims. What the problematic thing about the for Sims is they didn’t say. They’ll keep me banned and I’ll probably lose a lot of Sims.

I begged them to not delete them, so I can save them to my library or to my computer. But no comment….

I'm also going to put your previous messages here ^ so I can respond!

I am so sorry for your situation, genuinely. Did they tell you which specific sims/gallery posts led to the ban? Even if they didn't tell you why there were problematic, if you know which posts caused the ban I might be able to look at them and tell you what the gallery might have constituted as "problematic."

Also, are they holding firm that you won't be able to buy games in the future, or have they at least resolved that? Have you heard back from them since you asked to save your sims? Not to be a negative nelly, but I am not surprised they're not being super empathetic. This is just... how these big corporations are. Never super helpful, but it sucks and I am really sorry.

More under the cut  ↓

This game is buggy af and truly, it might not even be something you did. I call it a trashcan with a Gucci belt because that's what it has become. I love the Sims, it holds a special and nostalgic place in my heart, but boy oh boy does the Sims 4 piss me off on a daily basis so I get where you're coming from (lol).

Unfortunately, it sounds like your save files are corrupted. It could have been a mod that broke them, it could have been an update on EA's end, it could be a number of things causing your problem... but I don't think there's any fix outside of cleaning your cache files, removing all mods and CC, repairing your game through the EA app, creating a brand new save, and seeing if the issue persists after doing all that. From my research, it seems some players had a similar issue to what you're describing after the integration of Snowy Escape (there's a whole thread from 2020 on Answers HQ).

Alternatively, if you have or had any custom content food stalls in your game older than 2022, they will break your save file, even if you remove your mods/the custom stalls after the issue presents itself. If you have loaded the game with the custom food stalls and have since saved with that CC still in your game, the save file remains broken forever. This actually was caused by the My Wedding Stories Atrocity errr... Pack. Here's a Answers HQ thread on that.

Either way, something likely permanently corrupted your saves. On the bright side, it might not be the Sims themselves that are broken! Here are two answers HQ threads that are all about troubleshooting broken, irreparable saves: Thread 1, Thread 2. I'm sure there's something in there that could help you. I also think, if your saves are corrupted but not your sims, you could probably save a copy of your tray folder to your desktop before factory resetting the game, and then you wouldn't lose your sims because you could just copy and paste the tray files back into your fresh game. It's worth going in, saving the the townies you don't want to lose to your library, saving and exiting your game, then making that copy of the folder just in case.

Worst case scenario, your game is still having issues and you know the sims themselves are corrupted. Best case scenario, and in my opinion the more likely one, you find that the issue is gone once the game is repaired and all the broken saves have been removed and then you still have all those sims you love without the bug itself.

I've rambled so much, I apologize! I hope some resource I've given you has been helpful. I've said it before and I'll probably say it again, I'm not tech-savvy lol but I am genuinely happy to help you to the best of my ability. If you Google "Food stalls and curio shop only selling produce sims 4" you will find so many different people with the same issue you have.

In the future, I think the best tips I can give are:

Save modded sims with an abundance of CC to your library, not to the gallery. If you wish to share your sims that use cc, the gallery is not an effective place to do this.

Always keep your Mods folder organized - keep mods in their own labeled distinct folders and keep CC in its own distinct folders. CC can even have subfolders! I will put an example of this at the end of this list, but this is really important because it makes it easier to not only find issues if they arise, but also makes it easier to stay on top of keeping your mods up to date.

To piggy-back off that last point: keep your mods up to date. A broken mod can corrupt a whole save file if you're not careful.

Remove mods and cc before you update your game. Only place them back in once you know it is safe to do so and all your mods have been updated. Play with modded objects at your own risk, but know they might corrupt an entire save.

Regularly clear your cache files, especially after altering your mods folder by removing or adding a new mod.

I also recommend creating a subfolder in your cc folder called "New CC - [Month]" That way if your game starts acting funky suddenly, you can start with that folder. For me, that's roughtly 40 items that could be the problem as opposed to hundreds of files.

I know that is a lot, but playing with Mods and CC is something that does take some level of proactive vigilance. If TS4 wasn't constantly barfing up bullshit updates and bug fixes on players at every possible opportunity, it wouldn't be as tedious of a commitment...but that's just what we have to deal with.

Here's how I have my main MODS folder organized:

Here's one example of the subfolders I use specifically in CAS - CC:

Anyway, all that to say I am so sorry for your situation. I hope you can get some level of these issues solved, but if not I hope you can still play your game and make the best of a situation that is out of your control. It sucks, and I'm sending you some virtual hugs (or high fives if that is more your thing).

[scarfacemarston]

Ah god damn it, sorry this is the last one I swear 😂😂😂 It just worked to download from your latest audio and not the other ones in your archives... So the question is still if you know where to get character speeches audio files 😅 sorry sorry. Have a nice day 😂

No worries about the anons! I appreciate receiving them. There are sometimes months when I don't receive any. I upload these from my private computer. They were on my desktop, I found, isolated, and coded them myself. It cost me well over 200 dollars to do it. That does not count the computers I've "blown up" I don't expect you to read everything I write, But I have warned people NOT to work on the audio files. I blew up my old computer desktop and just blew up my newer one to work on it. Both are broken now because of these files. I have to buy a new one. This, in total, while old and used, would easily be at least 700 bucks. So, that makes my work at least 900 dollars to bring you all the audio files.

I also had to buy a second copy of the game and a new external hard drive; That is why It seems so pathetic that I ask for people to interact with me, but I really did do the work and have literally paid the price of doing so. I also have my audio engineering products that cost money. So, I have literally everything you would want except for a few conversations I've been working on uploading. Trying to complete requests is what caused my latest computer to crash. I don't understand why the archive posts don't work. I'll see if I can do something because I have things like every epilogue file, almost every low honor files, all taunting files, (I have a second set coming) all conversations wtih every character except a few final four or five with Dutch and a few with Grimshaw and the Rev that were requested. So I truly have the nearly completed archive because of my years of work. There are less than 10 that I have to find out of 300 converations. That's 290 at the most. That's why I'm saying that I'm the best source because of the hard work I put in since late 2019/early 2020. This also includes the complete visual archive as I call it of every non main story journal entry from drawings, newspapers, in game photos, etc. Please do not at all think this is directed at you! This is towards everyone who has been asking about it.

[dairy-farmer]

Hi! I think the links for your masterlists are broken 😞. Just a quick FYI.

thank you all for letting me know!!! I really appreciate it and don't worry this isn't a bother at all!!!

i didn't realize that there was an issue and since I haven't checked tumblr in a few days I hadn't realized anyone had been trying to let me know about this issue!!! (in case something like this happens again and i dont respond within the day i'm more likely to see it on twitter- just in case!)

i'd also like to thank the two asks I included above they were the ones to catch it early! on what seemed to be the 14th.

so I believe I know the cause of this issue of not being able to view the masterlist especially in regards to the the second ask where it mentions an issue with a browser. the only thing I've changed about my tumblr recently was I messed with the visibility settings to be as I set below

I changed it to hide my account from people without an account about 4 days ago because of something that happened on twitter (nothing bad! just my realizing that underaged people could view the content and follow when it's something I prefer they didn't and since turning of anon on the inbox to prevent underaged people from sending asks would be hurting others who want to retain anonymity I decided to do this instead.)

however this seemed to have the unintended conseqeunce of messing up the masterlist link for people on mobile it appears (desktop as well possibly?). the masterlink issue seems recent since it's never happened before and this is the only change I've done recently so I think the only fix i can do is to undo it (which I've done and the masterlist should be working as of my posting of this ask👍)

I'll just be more clear in the description box and header that the content is nsfw and 18+ and if any underaged person sees this and decides to read the matierial anyway that is just something I have to be okay with as a possibility, I really have no say in what anyone does on the internet and I doubt every person who has visited a porn website or read an E rated fic on ao3 was an adult so I do get the curiosity.

but with the anonymity factor of the inbox and just the overall blanket of assumption that everyone on the internet may be lying- i can't actually stop an underaged person from sending me an ask but I can state that i'd greatly prefer they DIDN'T.

underaged people stumble across and seek out nsfw content I get that but what they shouldn't be doing is sending asks, interacting with, messaging, or following that content and its not just about the kind of matierial it is that makes it a problem.

-interacting with strangers online (not just nsfw ones) should always be conducted carefully don't give out your age, name, personal details without thought for the very serious repercussions they could carry if the person turns out to be a not-so friendly stranger.

-if you're underaged and leave your phone or computer out: a parent could see the kind of content you watch/read and the consequences could range from mild embarrassment to pretty severe depending on the household.

-nsfw work is not a how-to guide or an instructional manual. there's a 'right' way that sex works in real life and if you're young you may not fully understand that and try to use what you've "learned" from fics, porn, etc and you could hurt someone or yourself.

sorry if this seems preachy or that this ask about a simple issue with the masterlist led to a spiel and small PSA.

tumblr hasnt proven to be an issue with this kind of thing recently so id ont want anyone to feel discouraged but I just wanted to make sure anyone who was curious about it understood the 'why'.

hopefully the masterlist is back in order! from what I can tell the links themselves in the lists work fine and it was just the masterlist link itself that was the issue!

[lisatelramor]

Crossing Borders Ch3

Sorry for not posting on wednesday. My computer got broken irreparably on monday and i've spent all week getting a new one and transferring files over. Today involved almost 3.5 hours of driving because the store is 45 mins away give or take a bit on traffic. T_T I had to go back because I got home and couldn't find my files. Turns out for some reason the new microsoft system defaults to cloud--including desktop--and wasn't bringing any of my files up when I searched either -_-;;; I have had very high cortisol levels this last week. Sigh. Anyway, enjoy this chapter, guys!

*

There were few things Lan Zhan disliked about being a cultivator. He enjoyed the fulfilment he got from training, the pleasant burn of well-used muscles and the peace of a long meditation session. He enjoyed the challenge of a night hunt and knowing he was protecting people. He enjoyed his sect’s musical cultivation and the creative outlet it gave him. He even enjoyed, to some extent, the myriad of rules, because they gave life structure—even if by this point in his life he also had come to the conclusion that some rules were more worthwhile than others.

What Lan Zhan did not enjoy was dealing with people. Unfortunately, being a cultivator could occasionally require a lot of that. While he had grown to have some satisfaction in teaching, distraught, anxious, grieving people were not a demographic he ever found easier to deal with.

“What do you mean he’s dead?” Wan Haoran, one of the victim’s friends asked, his face not as upset as Lan Zhan would have expected considering he just received news of his friend’s demise. “He was just with us in the pottery hall less than two hours ago.”

“Unfortunately,” Lan Zhan repeated, “there was an accident.”

“What kind of accident?” Chen Xinyi asked. She, at least, looked properly upset. Her face was pale and pinched with anxiety. She had been dating the victim, if he remembered correctly.

“He fell off one of the cliffs off-trail,” Wei Ying said bluntly at Lan Zhan’s side. “Do you have any idea why he might have been wandering in the mountain alone and far from the walking trails?”

Chen Xinyi shook her head, tears building in her eyes that she didn’t let fall. “I. No… He was. He was upset. Needed to go on a walk, he’d said, but. He was planning to join us for dinner and never showed up.”

“I guess now we know why,” Li Zihan said, the last member of their group sitting on one of the corner beds in the room. She looked tired, resigned, like bad news was one more thing on top of many bad things. “I thought he just needed more time to cool down. He feels things—felt things… strongly, you know? Sometimes he needed to go on his own for a while until he evened out again.”

“He always tried to follow what he said he’d do though,” Chen Xinyi said. The tears spilled over, sliding down her cheek uninhibited.

“Did something trigger his poor mood?” Lan Zhan asked. “The monitors in the group activities you were present in did not notice anything unusual with his behavior during the program.”

The group collectively hesitated, and Wei Ying clearly honed in on it, leaning forward.

“So something did upset him,” Wei Ying said. “During or after the activities?”

“…After,” Li Zihan grunted. “It was my fault. I shouldn’t have mentioned some things.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” Wan Haoran argued. “It’s ridiculous to act like nothing happened and just forget—”

“Forget what?” Wei Ying said, frustration making his voice sharp.

None of them could look them in the face. Chen Xinyi twisted a handkerchief, its edges already wet through.

“About a month ago, one of our friends died,” Wan Haoran said after a long moment. “They were really close. Shen Ming knew him from before college, and of all of us I think he was taking the death the worst. It’s actually why we decided to come here. Everything we read said this place was good for calming strong emotions and finding peace. We thought…” He trailed off.

“I shouldn’t have brought up Huang Fang,” Li Zihan said. “It’s just… he was looking calmer and I didn’t even think… It was a good memory of him. We should be able to remember the good without focusing on the tragedy.”

“People do not recover the same way, or in a straightforward manner,” Lan Zhan said. His own grief over his parents—his mother’s death, father’s neglect, and his father’s eventual death—had taken a long time to process. Presumably, Shen Ming could have recovered over time. Instead, he’d been killed before he could finish working through those emotions. It was sad, but also a little worrisome; their victim had more reasons than his murder to hold resentment past his death.

“May I ask how your friend died?” Wei Ying said, remaining focused on the important things even as Lan Zhan let himself be distracted. “I know it’s probably not something you want to think about…”

“He…fell,” Chen Xinyi said. “Not off a cliff. But.”

“He suicided,” Li Zihan said heavily. “Or at least that’s what it seemed to be. Shen Ming was there. Couldn’t talk him down.”

“You don’t think it was suicide?” Wei Ying asked, catching her wording. “Do you think Shen Ming pushed him?”

“He wouldn’t!” Chen Xinyi said immediately, eyes wide and horrified at the mere thought. “He was so devastated after! They were like brothers…”

To the side, Wan Haoran shifted, uncomfortable. Lan Zhan studied the pinched tension in his face and jaw. Remembering the event? Or something else entirely?

“Either way, the result is the same,” Li Zihan said. “They’re both dead now… Did. Did Shen Ming… Did it look like he…?”

“I do not think he went out there intending to die,” Lan Zhan said as gently as he was able. Wei Ying was better with sympathy, but he’d been told in the past that sometimes a calm, even tone could be just as helpful.

“An accident then,” Chen Xinyi said, sniffling. “He must have slipped…”

Lan Zhan exchanged a glance with Wei Ying, neither of them offering the true cause of death for the moment. There was still the uncomfortable look on Wan Haoran’s face, and too many questions to say that these people weren’t also involved in some way.

“Oh yeah,” Wei Ying said, like a thought had only just occurred to him. “We found an odd wooden bead on him; would you know anything about that?”

Recognition. Chen Xinyi’s hand twitched toward her chest—right about where a pendant would be—and her two friends also twitched.

“The bead was Huang Fang’s,” Wan Haoran said after a moment. “He had a bracelet of prayer beads his grandfather gave him that he wore everywhere. When he died, most of the bracelet was ruined, but we each kept a bead. To remember, you know?”

Lan Zhan resisted the urge to pinch his brow and sigh. Prayer beads that were emotionally significant to their owner, that had been worn regularly, and then died with him. That would definitely be enough for a ghost to latch onto. Although, why only Shen Ming had been affected was unclear. Now at least one bead had two deaths in its existence, and could possibly be on its way to a resentful artifact if they were unlucky.

“Huh,” Wei Ying said, leaning forward. “Would you mind showing me one?”

“That’s a little insensitive,” Wan Haoran said, one wrist pulling close to his body where he must have his bead. He looked at Wei Ying, cold and accusative. “Our friend died, so soon after another, and you want to look at a bead?”

“Ah, sorry, sorry.” Wei Ying held up his hands apologetically. “It just felt significant.”

“Well it’s not.” Wan Haoran shifted in front of his friends. “Unless you’re going to let us see his body, I think you should go now.”

“Of course,” Lan Zhan cut in with the slightest of polite nods. “You will be informed when his body can be visited.” He and Wei Ying retreated, the door closing on the sound of Chen Xinyi’s tears starting up in earnest again.

Wei Ying sighed as they left the room behind them. “Well. That could have gone better.”

“Hm. The beads?”

“Probably how that spirit got in. If it’s their friend, there is the question of why he’s targeting them.”

Lan Zhan hummed speculatively. “Perhaps anger over not preventing his death?”

“Or something… Wan Haoran was kind of shifty, did you notice?” Wei Ying’s fingers drummed absently on his crossed arms. “There’s something we are missing about the friendship.”

“I do not think Wan Haoran will reveal what that is.”

“Same.” Wei Ying sighed before nudging Lan Zhan. “If we play Inquiry, do you think our angry spirit will answer? Or should I go plant a spirit trap?”

“First we should add extra warding to the dormitories,” Lan Zhan said. “After… Perhaps Shen Ming’s spirit would remember what occurred at his friend’s death.”

“…Do you think I can get away with some of my specialized talismans?”

Lan Zhan’s lips tipped up at the edges. “If Wei Ying places them very carefully out of view, no one will know.”

“Are you encouraging me to be heretical?” Wei Ying asked, delighted.

“To take all the possible care in protecting our guests,” Lan Zhan corrected.

“Yeah, well your uncle would still skin me if he knew. Ah, I’m such a corrupting force on you!” Wei Ying swooned dramatically.

“Are not.” Lan Zhan let their shoulders bump together gently. “You still have not eaten,” he said into the companionable silence that followed. “Eat, then set talismans.”

“Or I could set talismans, then eat.”

Lan Zhan looked at Wei Ying patiently, knowing he would cave to Lan Zhan’s desire to ensure he was cared for.

“Ah, Lan Zhan, you’re spoiling me again.”

Lan Zhan hummed, content. There might be a crisis going on, but he wasn’t going to let Wei Ying neglect himself if he could help it.

*O*O*

Conan was going to break something. Preferably something on a certain someone. Kid, with his usual level of charisma, had managed to put Ran and Mouri in a good mood with card tricks, four games of poker, and a bunch of random stories that flowed seamlessly into one another, keeping everyone entertained. It was annoying because if it hadn’t been Kid, Conan might have actually found it entertaining.

Because it was Kid, he kept waiting for the other shoe to fall. There had to be something more going on here.

“—field full of bunnies,” Kid said, shuffling cards for a new game—blackjack now as poker had become frustrating. “I admit, I was pretty surprised to see them since this place has all kind of rules against bringing in pets and vegetarianism as the norm, but apparently, they were wild rabbits that became domesticated from people sneaking to feed them or something, and eventually the higher ups caved and made them official protected animals. That was before they got added as part of the therapy program, I think. Fuzzy animals are actually really good for soothing the spirit. Good on the newer generations for thinking outside the meditative box, right?”

Conan huffed. He would love to escape and go looking for clues, but there was no way to sneak off. Even with Kid keeping them entertained, Mouri and Ran were on high alert after Conan snuck off earlier.

“What are you here researching?” Ran asked Kid, taking the cards he dealt comfortably. Conan took his cards grudgingly; he’d tried backing out of games only to be dragged back by Mouri because it would ‘keep him occupied.’

“Ah.” Kid’s smile never faltered. “You know, there’s a huge library here, full of a lot of interesting topics. It’s well-known in certain circles for its obscure texts on the supernatural.”

“So you’re here researching, what? Legends and ghost stories?” Mouri muttered, with a frown at his hand of cards.

“Legends in part,” Kid said, dealing another card when prompted. “It probably seems silly, but legends have fueled humanity’s progress. Chasing better medicines, better weapons, better technology and methods… I ran across a legend in Japan, and was having trouble tracing it. A friend recommended trying here since their records are so comprehensive.”

“It’s also all in Chinese,” Conan said drily. And who knew what dialect or how simplified some of those documents were.

“I can read enough to get a sense of if I have the right topic,” Kid said, “and then there’s several individuals who are more than happy to help me on my research.”

Conan narrowed his eyes. “Was one called Wei Ying by chance?”

“You must have been by the library.” Kid dealt Ran another card at her gesture, then Mouri, who grimaced hard. He had a terrible poker face.

“He looked like he lived there.” Reluctantly, Conan gestured for another card as well. The three he was dealt brought him to twenty; a decently good hand.  

“Oh, he basically does. Well, in the library, in the bunny field, or glued to his boyfriend’s side depending on his mood. You wouldn’t know it to look at him, but he’s actually one of the leading minds of his generation in paranormal studies.”

“Great, so he’s a genius with ghost stories,” Mouri said sarcastically. “Sounds real useful for a career.”

“More like exorcisms, warding, and demonic identification, if I’m getting the translation right,” Kid said cheerfully like he’d missed the sarcasm entirely. “He has some fascinating thoughts about the search for immortality.”

Conan might never live down the moment that he shares a commiserating look with Mouri.

“Any more cards?” Kid asked, still cheerful. “No? Well then…” He laid out his cards. Blackjack. Again.

This was the third time in six rounds.

“You’re cheating,” Conan said as he showed his hand. “You’ve won five of the rounds.” This one included because Ran had nineteen and Mouri had busted, going seven over twenty-one. Kid had to be cheating.

“I could be counting cards,” Kid said, returning the hands to the deck, “but I’m not. And I’m not palming them, or cutting the deck in my favor. I just have Lady Luck on my side.”

“Well share a bit of it around because this is getting boring,” Mouri grumbled. “Are they going to keep us here all night, or what?”

“I’m sure they have good reason,” Ran said.

Conan had a twinge of guilt because he hadn’t told them about the murder yet. If he did, Mouri would probably try to swan in on it without even being able to speak to anyone clearly, and muddle everything up even more. He could feel Kid’s glance like a weight as cards shuffled endlessly. Some kind of tic probably.

“I’m sure we’ll be allowed out in the morning,” Kid said.

“Oh, so now you’re inviting yourself to stay the night, too?” Mouri said. “Well, there’s only three beds, so you’re out of luck.”

“I can share with Conan-kun,” Kid said with a friendly grin. “If it comes down to that anyway.”

“I don’t think the beds are big enough to share!” Conan cut in. The idea of being crammed in with Kid onto a cot of a bed was nightmare fuel.

“You’re not that big,” Kid said. “I could take the floor too if sharing is asking too much, but I’d like to save my back if I can.”

“Conan-kun, you can sleep with me,” Ran said.

It was meant to be kind. No one would think anything of a child sleeping beside them. But. Conan felt himself freeze. Sleep next to Ran? With her pressed against him? Just the two of them? “I can take the floor,” he blurted, face probably fire truck red.

Kid snickered, covering the expression innocently when the others looked. Conan scowled at him, not that scowling ever seemed to do anything.  “I couldn’t kick you out of your bed,” Kid said, almost convincingly sincere, the bastard.

“I insist,” Conan said, hating him.

“Ah, I have a travel pillow,” Ran said, accepting the change in plans easily enough like she always did. “And there’s a spare blanket… Conan-kun, do you mind using a few towels as a mattress?”

“That’s fine…” Damn Kid, this was a defeat for Conan this time. Next time he’d definitely win though.

The card game was wrapped up and bedding distributed with little discussion after that. Conan grumpily curled up on his ‘mattress’ of towels and uncharitably wished Kid an unpleasant sleep and a crick in the neck.

*O*O*

When the alarm started ringing, Wei Ying was horribly tempted to shove a pillow over his head, burrow closer in Lan Zhan’s arms, and go back to sleep. Unfortunately, this wasn’t their morning alarm clock alarm, but the emergency bell. Again. At—Wei Ying squinted at the soft glow of the alarm clock—four in the morning. Not even the Lan woke at four in the morning.

Naturally, there wasn’t actually a choice in going back to sleep. There certainly wasn’t any burrowing back into Lan Zhan’s arms, because he was already sitting up and reaching for a shirt.

“Why?” Wei Ying asked rhetorically.

Lan Zhan paused where he was slipping on his earlier-discarded socks. He gently tucked a strand of Wei Ying’s bird-nest, slept-on hair behind an ear, hand lingering on Wei Ying’s face. “You do not have to get up.”

Lan Zhan was sweet. Really. As much as Wei Ying wanted to go back to sleep and blissfully leave whatever problem was happening now in someone else’s hands, that wasn’t really an option.

“They might need me,” Wei Ying said forcing himself upright. Ugh. Too early. He was going to have an awful headache, like a sleep hangover. “Want to bet it’s the ghost no one could find earlier?”

Lan Zhan scoffed. “Obvious.”

“I dunno. Could have a couple murderous spirits by now. You never know.”

Wei Ying got yesterday’s pants to the face as Lan Zhan started gathering up clothes for Wei Ying too.

“Peh. Thanks, I wanted dusty denim to the face first thing in the morning.”

“I will grab you coffee later,” Lan Zhan said. He already looked like he hadn’t just rolled out of bed. Wei Ying was wildly jealous of how easily his boyfriend went from ‘disheveled’ to ‘could be in an office or a fashion runway’ with seemingly zero effort. Wei Ying felt lucky if he didn’t look like a bum in the same amount of time.

Shoving his limbs haphazardly into clothing, Wei Ying staggered toward the door. “Wait! No, talismans, talismans…”

Lan Zhan handed him a stack and Suiban at the same time.

“Oh. Thanks.”

His boyfriend took a moment to smooth Wei Ying’s hair out of his face because he was the functional one between the two of them, and then they were hurrying out into the night. Day? Night; the sun wasn’t up yet so it wasn’t morning in his book.

Outside, disciples were poking their heads out or hurrying by, some still in sleep clothes. Unfortunately, the guests were too, and they didn’t look like they were going to cooperate in returning to their beds this time without some sort of explanation.

Wei Ying scanned the crowd for familiar faces. Sure enough, the child from before was wiggling to the front of the group, probably trying to see what was going on. What an annoyingly nosy child. Hadn’t he heard of listening to adults? (Not that Wei Ying had ever been good at that himself, but it was the principle of things.) Add a probable curse to the mix and the kid had the potential to be a danger magnet.

Lan Zhan, much less distractable, caught someone heading from the emergency bell’s direction. “What is happening?”

The girl had a harried look of someone on a mission, but she stopped because Lan Zhan was one of the heirs to the sect. “The body is gone and another guest is dead.”

“Well shit,” Wei Ying said. He was not awake enough for this. “Who died now?”

“Chen Xinyi,” the disciple said, shifting in the way that said she’d be walking away already if it was polite to.

Lan Zhan nodded in thanks. “We won’t keep you longer,” he said, and the girl hurried away before he got all the words out.

“Chen Xinyi is…?” Wei Ying asked, drawing a blank. He wasn’t good with names and faces at the best of times, let alone just after waking up.

“The first victim’s girlfriend,” Lan Zhan said.

“Oh.” Well, double shit then. “Nothing should have gotten past the talismans we set last night.”

“Hm.”

Ugh. Either they had a human hand working in all of this or someone had messed up somewhere with the first corpse. “And the first victim, what, walked off? Killed his girlfriend?”

“We will find out,” Lan Zhan said, as composed as ever.

“Lan Zhan, Wei Ying!” a young voice called. Oh look, there was their cursed child. He elbowed past people’s legs, hurrying over, the guy here to research alchemic immortality behind him looking like he’d rather be somewhere else. Like asleep.

Wei Ying related. “Hey kid. Didn’t we say you should stick with your guardians?”

“Good luck getting him to do that,” the man—ah, what was his name again? Kuroba, right? Kuroba Kaito, jeeze Wei Ying needed caffeine—said. “Edogawa has a reputation.”

“Mr. Kuroba, Edogawa Conan,” Lan Zhan said.

“This brat is going to give Mouri-chan a panic attack, but obviously it’s more important to find out who died now.”

“Shut up!” Edogawa said with a truly impressive scowl.

“Huh.” Wei Ying glanced between them. “I didn’t know you knew each other.”

“Oh,” Kuroba said with a long-suffering look, “we’ve definitely met. So, who’s dead now?”

“What makes you think someone is dead?” Lan Zhan asked, his natural blank face keeping any hint of his thoughts at bay.

Kuroba, who could have just as good of a blank face as Lan Zhan, gave him a deadpan stare. “It’s always someone dying when Edogawa is around.”

“You’re exaggerating,” Edogawa snapped. He looked like a different child than the one Wei Ying met before, but maybe he was just less polite and more aggressive toward people he knew well. “There are plenty of times no one dies. You make it sound like I have corpses falling from the sky when I’m around.”

“Didn’t that happen?” Kuroba said.

“Falling out of a building doesn’t count.”

Oh wow, Wei Ying was getting more concerned for this child by the second, but he really couldn’t even start digging into that problem until they’d done something about the current one. “Yeah, there is someone else dead,” Wei Ying said softly, hoping no one overheard.

“Who?” Edogawa demanded. “Where was the body found? Cause of death?”

Wei Ying looked to Lan Zhan because he really was too tired to deal with this.

“Another from the same group,” Lan Zhan said calm as could be. “We have yet to learn the particulars.”

“I can help,” Edogawa said.

“Oh hell no,” Wei Ying said. It came out in English even though he was thinking it in Mandarin. “We already had this conversation. You’re a child. Children shouldn’t be interacting with corpses.”

“Thank you!” Kuroba said. “I’m so glad someone said it because it’s really unnerving.”

“Oh, come on! You’ve helped me solve cases before!” Edogawa said, glaring up at Kuroba.

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean you have to solve them! Other people can figure things out!”

Edogawa shot into a furious sounding mess of Japanese that had Kuroba grimacing and rolling his eyes.

Wei Ying was losing patience with this. “Look, you just. Stay. We need to find out what the hell is going on.”

Kuroba grimaced again. “Actually, can we tag along? It’s probably safer than him sneaking out.”

“I thought it was his guardian that was the detective,” Wei Ying said to Lan Zhan in Mandarin. “If this didn’t involve ghosts, I’d say drag him along.”

“It would be better to keep an eye on Edogawa,” Lan Zhan said slowly. “His curse might be part of what is happening.”

“You think? I thought it seemed pretty clearly a spirit with a grudge.”

“Mm, but perhaps the curse has a side effect of boosting resentment. If that were the case…”

“Ah. It would tip a scale from a mild threat to a serious one.”

“And perhaps be enough to lead to people near him to commit murder if they were already contemplating it.”

Well, that was a terrifying thought. It made him want to ask how big a range the deaths this kid ran across. If it was concentrated around where he lived, then there could be a plottable range of a curse’s effects. And it could be cumulative, the longer someone was in the range, the more likely they’d reach the conclusion that murder was the solution to whatever their problem was.

Who the hell even came up with something like that??

“Lan Zhan, I don’t think I’m qualified enough to deal with that level of a curse,” Wei Ying said, exhausted.

“Mm, set it aside for now. One problem at a time.”

“Right.” Just a ghost and maybe a fierce corpse that shouldn’t have been able to become a fierce corpse, and a dead girl and a missing corpse. And a child who might be escalating things by accident just by existing. Lovely. On the other hand, Kuroba had abnormally good luck, finding things in the library that Wei Ying hadn’t even known existed that actually related to what the man was researching. With any luck, maybe some of that good fortune would cancel out some of Edogawa’s and they wouldn’t have any more corpses. “You two,” Wei Ying said, switching back to English to point at the two guests so insistent about tangling themselves up in this mess. “You’re staying with each other at all times. Kuroba, you’re his impulse control. And no one is walking around without a partner.”

“He’s my impulse control?” Edogawa said indignantly.

“I didn’t catch him hanging off a wall to spy on a corpse,” Wei Ying said, “so yes, he’s your impulse control.”

Kuroba grinned. “Oh, I think I can do that. Hear that? I have better control than you, Conan-kun.”

“Do you like your shins? Because you’re going to be bruised all over them if you continue.”

Ignoring that sickeningly sweet threat, Wei Ying caught Lan Zhan’s hand. “C’mon. Your uncle is probably having an aneurism.”

*O*O*

Kaito was having a bad day. Morning? Morning. He was having a bad morning because 1, there was a murder. A second murder. 2, he had an annoying detective to keep track of (for multiple reasons of course). 3, he had slept terribly. 4, the inevitable chaos that followed Edogawa was playing havoc with his research time. And 5, he was on his way to see yet another corpse.

Yippie. Just what he wanted to be doing with his day, right? It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen more than enough dead bodies killed in violent ways in the last year since Edogawa showed up. Not even a year, really. How had his luck failed so badly that Edogawa Conan managed to show up in a remote, selective, semi-religious retreat in a whole different country?

Really, Kaito had been grasping for straws when he asked Akako about different flavors of immortality. He’d fully expected to be brushed off, but he must have caught her at one of her good moods since she’d written him a recommendation to get in here. They followed a different branch of magic, a different religion, and spoke a different language, but magic communities must all be pretty interconnected because when Kaito reached out, he’d gotten a response and permission to look through their library.

Where had Lady Luck gone to land Edogawa in his lap?

Kaito fully expected the disciples hanging around the infirmary to block their way, but a word from Lan Zhan and they stepped aside, letting Kaito and Edogawa stroll right in. If he hadn’t already known that Lan Zhan was the second in line for being the leader of this place—kind of archaic to have familial leaders, like tiny kingdoms, but who was Kaito to judge—then he’d have probably figured it out with that alone.

People respected Lan Zhan. The only truly surprising thing was how often that respect wasn’t extended toward Wei Ying as well considering how likely it looked that he’d be marrying into the family. Or whatever people did in places where gay marriage wasn’t recognized.

If it were Kaito, he’d hop off to America for a bit and get a legally binding Vegas wedding, but that was just wanting to have a legally binding marriage somewhere even if it wasn’t at home.

…Not that he was all that likely to have a gay marriage in the first place.

Anyway. Corpse! There was a freshly murdered—it was definitely murder; there were hand-shaped bruises on the neck—corpse was set up on an exam table like she was a patient. Except that she was very clearly dead. What with the bruises and the unnatural angle of her neck…

Kaito grimaced. At least this wasn’t a bloody sort of murder.

There was a sharp-eyed man watching over the body. He frowned when he caught sight of their group—or more specifically the people that shouldn’t have been part of it. Kaito gave a little wave, like this was just another part of his daily routine. It was honestly not something he was unfamiliar with by this time, which was a depressing thought.

Edogawa, as typical, zeroed in on the body and ignored everything else around him as irrelevant.

The man said something, a question, and Lan Zhan answered in a few curt words. Kaito was working on it, but his spoken and audial comprehension of Mandarin was still playing catch up to his reading skills. Either way, the man guarding the body didn’t stop Edogawa as the brat walked right up and started looking at the body’s throat.

“Is he always like that?” Wei Ying asked, not even bothering to be subtle as he nodded at Edogawa.

“Pretty much.” Kaito sighed. As Edogawa moved on to examining the woman’s wrists—there were a few bruises there too—Lan Zhan pulled a musical instrument from seemingly nowhere. It wasn’t the first time he’d seen the people here bend spatial reality, but it was still made him twitch inside. The magician in him was a little jealous of that kind of technology; imagine the things he could pull off if he wasn’t confined to physical space! The rest of him, the part that prided itself on artistry was annoyed by magical cheats for the sort of thing he would have to pull off with sleight of hand and creative use of mirrors. “What’s that for?” Kaito asked nodding at the string instrument.

“Communication,” Lan Zhan said like that wasn’t the most uncomfortable response he could have had.

Kaito shivered. Yeah, talking to ghosts was now up there with finding a corpse at all.

“It looks like she was killed by someone’s bare hands,” Edogawa said, still focused on the body to the point where he hadn’t even noticed actual magic happening behind him. “You can see the individual finger marks here…” He touched her neck lightly. “But it shouldn’t have been possible to do this much damage. This is… I could expect a gorilla to have that kind of grip, but a human hand—and this was a human hand—shouldn’t have done that much damage, let alone broken her neck the way it did. Breaking someone’s neck bare-handed is usually just leverage. This is practically crushing part of her vertebrae.”

Wei Ying raised an eyebrow in Kaito’s direction. Kaito shrugged. He didn’t really know how to say that Edogawa didn’t know anything about magic—real magic—and was a skeptic without leading to Edogawa having an argument about why magic couldn’t possibly be real with them.

“Anything else?” Wei Ying asked. Lan Zhan started playing, and aside from a glance at him, Edogawa seemed to assume that music was just part of death rituals here.

“She tried to fight, but it was a quick death. There’s a bit of skin under her nails and one of them broke, but most of her injuries seem to be confined to her neck.”

Edogawa frowned. “She shouldn’t have been able to get in here with everyone patrolling, let alone be killed. And then there’s the missing body of the first victim… What happened to him? He couldn’t have just walked away. Although if someone was strong enough to break a neck like that, they were probably strong enough to carry out a corpse single-handedly.”

Kaito and Wei Ying winced. Based on some of the things Kaito had been skimming, there was a pretty real probability that the corpse did in fact walk away. Kaito had never been more unhappy to hear that something like zombies existed, and he dealt with a witch that literally called upon Satan on the regular. It was all well outside Kaito’s area of expertise.

“Could you maybe not touch the corpse?” Wei Ying said, looking a little queasy as Edogawa took out a goddamn glove and started shifting clothing.

“I’m wearing a glove,” Edogawa said.

“…That is not the problem,” Wei Ying muttered under his breath.

“Just let him do his thing,” Kaito advised. “Creepy as it is, this really is normal for him.”

“Does he see a therapist? Because it feels like the sort of thing someone should see a therapist for.”

“You overestimate the willingness to seek out a therapist.”

“I know there’s stigma, but hell, you’re here aren’t you?”

Kaito snorted. “Yeah, we’re not here for the health benefits and you know it.”

“He might be.”

“Mouri-ojisan got free tickets from a lady at the racetracks,” Edogawa said, cutting into the conversation before they could get too off topic. “And the victim has an odd necklace…”

“Let me see,” Wei Ying said, leaning forward.

Kaito joined him. Wei Ying tugged down the victim’s shirt to show… a plain wooden bead that had been stuck on a fine chain. “That’s not the sort of necklace most young women would wear,” Kaito said. The chain was cheap, probably not even silver plated, and the bead looked worn. Paired with the otherwise normal outfit Kaito would expect from a college student spending time at a monastic-ish location—sleeves modestly long, clothing loose but flattering, wearing a simple patterned circle skirt—it was out of place. The victim’s earrings were far nicer comparatively; real silver with teardrop pearls.

How odd.

Wei Ying, however, didn’t appear to be surprised to see the necklace at all. “So she was also wearing it at the time she died,” Wei Ying muttered under his breath, thankfully still in English.

Edogawa jumped on the sentence like a terrier chasing a rat. “Too? Someone else had a bead like this?”

“The first victim,” Wei Ying said. “The beads are from a bracelet their friend owned, worn in his memory.”

Edogawa’s eyes burned with connections being made. “So it’s possible the deaths here are related to their friend’s demise.”

“Yeah,” Wei Ying said with a wry twist of his lips that meant whatever had done the murders was definitely of the supernatural variety, “I think it’s definitely related to that friend’s death.”

“Meaning the others in their group are either killers or the next victims,” Edogawa said, hand on his chin.

“If they stay where they’re supposed to, hopefully there will be no more victims,” Wei Ying said.

“I kind of doubt that’s going to happen,” Kaito said. Considering the track record with basically every time Kaito ended up around Edogawa.

“That’s pessimism talking,” Wei Ying said with forced cheerfulness. To the side, the sound of guqin strings faded to silence. “Lan Zhan. What’d you get?”

“The victim snuck out alone and slipped past the guards while they were changing shifts. I believe she merely intended to view the body of the first victim, but her presence seemed to have triggered resentment, and led to her death.” Lan Zhan reported this with a straight back and neutral expression. It was a little creepy considering he must have been communicating with the dead woman. Kaito suppressed a grimace.

“Thank you, Lan Zhan. Now we have to go tell the remaining guests about a second death…”

Edogawa frowned. “Wait. That’s all conjecture. There’s still no clear proof on who might have killed her, and if it was someone in her group, should we tell them we found her body?”

“Counter argument,” Kaito cut in, “if they’re the next potential victims, they need to know. Two dead friends are pretty convincing evidence that they have something to fear and everything to gain for not going anywhere alone.”

“Besides,” Wei Ying said, “this is going to be a legal shit show already. We’re going to have to make up so many waivers going forward.”

“Didn’t we already have to do that?” Kaito asked. He distinctly remembered skimming a document in English and Mandarin, hoping there wasn’t anything he was missing that he was agreeing to on there.

“I didn’t sign a waiver,” Edogawa said.

“You’re a minor,” Kaito said.

“Mm, normal visitors don’t sign them,” Lan Zhan said softly. “The library is different.”

“Ah.” Magic secrets and all that. Yeah, that made sense.

“Lan Zhan, do you want to be on bad-news duty or corpse searching? Or finding your uncle, I guess…”

“I do not believe I will have much to add to Uncle’s legal efforts. Although perhaps, Wei Ying would be best suited for searching for the first body…?” Lan Zhan tilted his head slightly in question.

Something about the intensity in which he said ‘best suited’ made Kaito’s neck hairs stand on end. Kaito didn’t really know a lot about what Wei Ying was researching in the library. He’d gathered that it was controversial, but the specifics were lost to his limited reading ability.

“Corpse duty it is,” Wei Ying said with a sigh. He rubbed his neck. “Well, Kuroba, Edogawa, you should either go back or stick with Lan Zhan because wandering around isn’t a good idea right now.”

“You’re wandering around,” Edogawa pointed out.

“Yes, but I’m trained to take care of myself with this sort of thing.”

Kaito could practically feel the curiosity warring with confusion in Edogawa’s twisty little brain. Ugh. He almost wanted to go back to his room. But the best place to be to know what was happening was at Edogawa’s side. Or perhaps Wei Ying’s too… If Kaito didn’t think this would blow up, he’d suggest splitting up and letting Edogawa deal with the human aspects while he helped Wei Ying with the supernatural.

That said, things were definitely going to go wrong, and he was probably going to be needed for damage control. Staying with Edogawa it was.

“Then I guess we’re going to break the news to some unhappy people,” Kaito said.

Edogawa looked even more torn for a moment, clearly wanting to see out his curiosity about Wei Ying, and yet also needing to know more about the victims’ friend group. “Fine…”

“Aw, don’t be grumpy,” Wei Ying said. “You’re still not being tossed back in your room.”

“Stop treating me like a little kid.”

“Technically, you are a little kid,” Kaito pointed out.

Edogawa scowled.

“Only technically?” Wei Ying said.

“He has a brain of someone three times that.”

“We will go now,” Lan Zhan cut in. “Wei Ying, stay safe.”

“You too.” Wei Ying leaned in to kiss his boyfriend’s cheek. It was cute, Kaito thought absently. It was rare to see same sex couples openly affectionate in public. It was nice to know that here it was accepted enough to do that even if not in the country as a whole. For all that he was in love with Aoko… well, he’d seen men he couldn’t help looking at before. It was nice to imagine that under different circumstances he might be able to find somewhere or someone to be that way toward.

Edogawa, on the other hand, looked like witnessing this was like watching people make out instead of a kiss on the cheek.

“Are you homophobic?” Kaito asked, in Japanese.

Edogawa twitched. “What? No! I just feel uncomfortable with people kissing in public. It’s like, hey, we’re still right here!”

This was perhaps the most like an actual child thing Edogawa had ever said and meant to Kaito’s face. “Really. Kissing bothers you.”

“Yes!”

Kaito laughed. And laughed harder when Edogawa scowled harder at him than when Wei Ying called him a child. “You’ll—heh—you’ll get it once you—ha—go through puberty!”

“I am going to kick you somewhere painful.”

“Is there a problem?” Lan Zhan asked. Wei Ying had walked away while Kaito was distracted.

Just them, Lan Zhan, a body, and an unhappy looking disciple at the doorway.

“No,” Kaito said back to English, forcing his laughter to subside. Ah, he’d needed that laugh. There was too much stress in his life lately. “I just found something Conan-kun said funny.”

“Then we must go.” Lan Zhan nodded to the disciple and turned away from the corpse.

Kaito followed him leisurely and, predictably, Edogawa trailed behind, glancing back at the corpse.

“What happened to the musical instrument?” Kaito heard Edogawa mutter, but it was quiet enough that it was to himself, so he didn’t answer. Let Edogawa broaden his horizons a bit and learn to accept the inexplicable.

Wasn’t there a Holmes quote about that? Ugh, he needed to stop hanging around Hakuba. He was actually starting to infiltrate his brain…

[newunknowns]

So I read some fic this year...

Shoutouts to Dibbs this is all his fault, she got me into it back whenever and showed me how to use Ao3 so I'm going to throw an unordered list on here for posterity. I'm going to be specific in some places down to the single work, or go broad in others to a series. It's all stranger things, sorry Dibbs.

Let us Dwell in Fair Ithilien and There Make a Garden by materialism, sparklyslug This is the series that really cracked open things for me, let me see what makes the fic tick as it were. The yearning over decades, the soft acceptance, Steve Harrington breaking down crying in Robin's bed, EXPECTATIONS IT'S ALL EXPECTATIONS.

Unlikely, But Likely by Pocket_Sand A delightful collection of AU one shots all centred on Ronance relationship stuff.

When It’s Cold (I’d Like To Die) by NotesFromTheChamber Holy fuck. This is the longest thing I've read this year, fic or novel. And it's the single most traumatic thing I've read and I fucking read Detransition, Baby this year. There is so much trauma here, PTSD, suicidal ideation, the works. This work was so much I read like 90k words of it before I realised the actual effect it was having on my mental health that week and started to take more care with it. Extremely worth it though. I honestly considered getting the note from this tattooed on my body I still have it screencapped on my desktop months later. Flour. Eggs. Butter. Milk. I love you.

The One in Which a Time Loop is Fucking Exhausting. by badpancake This is my visit to the land of time loops. I know The Lathe is the big one but I read this first and didn't get around to reading it all this is the one for me. Someone let Steve rest and give him a hug, please. He's so tired and lonely and broken.

Nurse Robin by Conspicuously_Gay When Robin and Nancy got together in like chapter 4 of at the time 20 when I was reading this I got very confused? It turns out you don't actually have to burn slow you can just have them kiss? A charming look at what happens if the girls are thrown together after a few years apart and decide to actually have their shit together.

I know I've kissed you before (Can I try again) by ChristinMKay The unfinished of the two Teacher AUs I read but still makes the list as there is more trauma and sadness and the weight of expectations on Steve's head so naturally I'm all over it.

the most remarkable thing about you standing in the doorway is that it’s you by greatunironic greatunironic made me cry a bunch recently but this is the big one. Sharing some similarities in world ideas to Ithilien this one has rockstar Eddie pulling his best Pete "I'm sorry, every single song is about you" Wentz impression, with the story framed by a series of magazine interviews from the 90s where it's very apparent that grunge icon Eddie is the world's most hung up boy. Finally pulling the trigger on my tearducts around a time when everyone is gathered at Hopper's deathbed, this fic is at the very least the most tears per minute read of the past month for me. Also shoutout to brutalist architecture, the other weight of time fic from the author.

this world is a cold one (it takes one to know one) by greatunironic WAYNE! CIS GIRL STEPH! This one isn't that long or complicated, but it's a great Wayne POV and an appearance by girl Harrington, because of course I love it when Steddie are actually girls. Even if I haven't read a ton of it.

did you find the key (and what is the meaning of it?) by CoffeeAndArrows, moonlitprincess This is from a longer series of works post s4 with a lot of Ronance and some Steddie but this work in particular is maybe my favourite depiction of Nancy and Eddie being friends, set mostly in the aftermath of Eddie getting attacked by jocks who still think he killed Jason. It's fun when lesser explored pairings get their time to shine.

all's well that ends well (to end up with you) by moonflowerdamie This might be the one fic from before anyone knew what a Steddie was, written back in May before s4 dropped. This thing has like, background Stonathon for crying out loud. But the reason it's here is the scene of Nancy taking things into her own hands and outing herself in front of a panicking El and Max to show them that it's ok, that it's ok that they like girls, that she's there for them. Maybe the Nancy scene of the year.

The Second Chance Club by walkingsaladshooter I read this twice over last weekend and it fucking killed me. Chrissy Cunningham I love you, you deserve the world. A ressurected Chrissy and a ressurected Eddie trying to find a place in the world, and the gang coming together to protect them both.

took you for a working boy by pukner I read this last night until 2am and it fucking rearranged my brain chemistry. Set in a world where Hawkins did actually break and a quarantine is in effect, with mutual aid in the community the only way that those left behind in town can survive against the Upside Down breaking into the real world. It's Non-Binary, he/him girl Steve Marie Harrington. It's codependant traumatised triad Steve/Eddie/Robin, it's people think Steddie is real even though it isn't, it's Steve being so very sad about the fact that he's not a boy and the boy he loves is gay. It's the best fic I've read this year for at least the next day. This fic makes me want to develop codependant relationships with my friends, to platonically share a bed every night, to scream from the rooftops and play Danger Days on loop because the author eventually figured out that this was their Killjoys/Stranger Things AU and that kind of mashup should be illegal for how targeted at me it is.

[the-kipsabian]

update so two days (?) in i have no discovered that tumblr hides at least two blogs from my dash for no reason im sorry im tagging you i think this is just a glitch on either tumblrs or my end, but just to double check if you get notifications or whatever the fuck is happening but hi @the-hiddenblade & @pepper-ika i cant see you on my dash, my apologies if i dont interact :(

like i can reblog and like and i get notifications just fine (so its not shadow ban which is. another whole can of worms we're dealing with rn on the side), and i can see and access the blogs just normally but they just dont show up on the dash, like, at all? or when i reblog something (that billy art last night for example) at least for me it doesnt show up on my dash

also its not just a desktop issue, same problems persist on mobile

just. just a thing i thought i should let you know?? i dont know what is broken on tumblrs end right now but yeah. ~~ISSUES~~

ALSO while writing this, unrelated, but i have discovered tumblr doesnt let me type in question marks into my posts??? these are copy pasted from another tab, which means i CAN type them so its not a computer issue but tumblr doesnt let me??

okay theres definitely something wrong with my tumblr tho

[thosepoorsoulswhodwellinnight]

My Door is Always Open (Ay Oh Ay)                    ~A Fjorester Playlist

Listen on spotify

Inspired by this post, @princessamericachavez‘s playlist here and of course the official playlists

Explanations (and angst) under the cut

You And I - Stripped, PVRIS

I know it’s warmer where you are And it’s safer by your side But right now I can't be what you want Just give it time [...] Can we meet in the middle? Bodies and souls collide Dance in the moonlight When all the stars align For you and I, for you and I, oh

“I know we could be good but not right now, not like this.” “I love you, but right now we’re not good for each other.” This song speaks of such a longing but yet such an acceptance for that this is not the time I will not get to love you like that

(sorry for the incoherence but this song gives me a hard time breathing but

But for now we stay so far 'Til our lonely limbs collide I can't keep you in these arms So I keep you in my mind

I have a lot of FEELINGS)

Like a Lie, Copeland

And in a flash we are on the shore, and everything we love is here. There are songs inside your words, every one that I adore. How could I ever love you more? How could I ever keep you here? I can only make this worse. I can only grasp for more. Feels like a lie when I hold you.

“We’re on the shore and everything should be perfect but I’m afraid I will destroy you.” To borrow some words from our favourite angst wizard: I was so sure, until I wasn’t.

The Saltwater Room, Owl City

Time together is just never quite enough When you and I are alone, I've never felt so at home What will it take to make or break this hint of love? We need time, only time When we're apart whatever are you thinking of? If this is what I call home, Why does it feel so alone? So tell me, darling, do you wish we'd fall in love? All the time, all the time

The juxtaposition of “you are my literal home” and “then why do I feel so alone?”. That feeling of “we’re not in love but we could be” and then at the make-or-break point they just break instead of make it. Read some of the replies on the post I linked way up at the top. Like, I want them to be endgame but I also really love angst

Happiness Will Ruin This Place, San Fermin

“Honey, can you see Bloodstains on my teeth I’m not the beast I used to be” Silence intervenes She looks up from her tea Says “Everything goes extinct” “When I close my eyes I don’t see your face I don’t know anything about you Oh it’s no surprise You lost your way Happiness will ruin this place”

This song continues along the same path as Your Somebody Else that Laura put on Jester’s playlist. “Do I really know you Fjord?” This also plays into Fjords bad sense of self and feeling of loosing himself to the hunt for power. What if you are not who I thought you were? What if that broken trust cannot be repaired?

ocean, flor

And if you asked me If I bit off a little bit more than I could chew I wouldn't lie to you But I can't let you through All around me Last thing I need is your warm face going cold Please stay around me Long as you keep that comfort close

This is for the most part Fjord’s song to Jester. I also keep coming back to Mitski’s “Goodbye My Danish Sweetheart” as another Fjord-centric song. Sadly that song didn’t make the cut, but I really want to include part of the lyrics here.

There's nobody better than you It took me a while till I knew But you knew from the start it was us, didn't you? It just took me a while till I knew

So I don't blame you if you want to Bury me in your memory, I'm not the [guy] I ought to be, but Maybe when you tell your friends, you Can tell them what you saw in me, and not how I turned out to be

If I Say, Mumford & Sons

The innocence in your face bled out without a trace You've won without an enemy, you're ill without a remedy As night bleeds into night, and I know I came off better than you It doesn't mean that I feel better [...] And if I say I love you, then I love you

There’s a thought that keeps bugging me, and it is the feeling that maybe, just maybe, they are not really in love, they just think they are. “If I say I love you, I will make it real even though I know in my heart of hearts it is not true.” and “I know I hurt you and I know I had less to lose than you but that doesn’t make me feel better.” I want them to be endgame so badly that it keeps me up at night but if I’m gonna suffer under all this angst I might as well bring some of you with me when I go under.

Tell Me How, Paramore

Tell me how to feel about you now Tell me how to feel about you now Oh oh oh oh, let me know Do I suffocate or let go?

This is Jester asking Fjord “how do you want me to react to this? Is this the real you? I don’t know how to read you anymore.”

Every Breaking Wave, U2

The sea knows where are the rocks And drowning is no sin You know where my heart is The same place that yours has been We know that we fear to win And so we end before we begin Before we begin

Jester falls out of love just as Fjord falls in love and this song has it all ok?? Angst and longing and sea metaphors and If you go your way and mine? Are we so helpless against the tide? Baby every dog on the street knows we’re in love with defeat? Are we ready to be swept off our feet? And stop chasing?? Every breaking wave???

Liability (Reprise), Lorde

All of the dreams that get harder All of the things that I offer you And... and all of the shit that we harbour [...] Maybe all this is the party Maybe the tears and the highs we breathe, oh no Maybe all this is the party Maybe we just do it violently But you're not what you thought you were

“Maybe this is all there was?” “Everything I thought were so easy when it came to you is so hard now and we have both changed but I am not sure it’s for the better.”

Broken, Ólafur Arnalds

And at the end they just stand there, without words, everything said and unsaid. Now they know. Now they know, they broke whatever they had between them.

My Door Is Always Open, Noah And The Whale

I will only, let you down. I will only, let you down. But my door, is always open. Yeah my door, is always open. Well I don't think, that I ever loved you. But the world is dying to meet you. Oh black birds they sing off the mountains. Joyous love songs that drift through the houses.

Oh well church bells, they are ringing for you. Oh and choirs are singing in red, Oh your voice could summon the angels, And your beauty, could waken the dead.

But now I'm free, Now I'm free, Now I'm free from all your pain. Well you have only let me down You have only, let me down But my door is always open Yeah my door is always open. Yeah I love with my heart and I hold it in my hands, But you know, my heart's not yours.

“I don’t love you like I thougth I did but I do no longer feel an ownership over you and you deserve the world and I cannot give you what you need but if you want my friendship you can always come back to me my door is open for you.”

[kyra45]

Pet donation scams

For years now, scammers have took to stealing info from legit fundraising posts to steal funds from actual users. So what do they do? It's quite simple to explain the process as someone whose been tracking those I've seen or spotted while searching around. Scammers reuse and redo these so often you can usually find a pattern and catch it before you reblog their post. This post is quite long, but should be useful.

tl:dr - An ask to reblog a pinned post is generally a scam related to pets and the pictures used are stolen from other sites and any info the scam post uses was stolen too with only minor adjustments like the scammers own info that may use the name of someone real.

Scammers do as follows:

Saves a pfp from a blogger and copies the blog info from someone else by copy/pasting it and saving it

Turns off asks

Searches a tag to reblog random posts to look relevant, generally about 10

Hides their blog so it can't be seen outside of desktop and archives aren't easy to access

Searches Facebook for publicly accessible posts where pets need help and may seek it from other sites. They will save photos of a cat but also will copy any information from the post or a different post with minor adjustments if needed

Once they have followed those steps, the scammers will then start to find random blogs. Some blogs may be past targets who fell for the scam and as a result may fall for it again. Or in other cases, blogs that have been targeted before by them and answered the ask without finding out its a scam. Some asks sent go as follows.

Hello there! Just wondering if its okay for you to check the post i pinned and reblog/boost it? Im in desperate need of help im really sorry for coming across your inbox (pls answer this privately) only if its ok 😞 thank you and stay safe

Hi there, im sorry for this (if it bothers you) please see my pinned post as I need help for it. Please boost/share it for us, thank you so much. Really means a lot 🙏

Hello there! Just wondering if its okay for you to check the post i pinned and reblog/boost it? Im in desperate need of help im really sorry for coming across your inbox (pls answer this privately) only if its ok :( thank you and stay safe

Hello! Im sorry if I did bother you by coming across your inbox. Just asking for some help if you can share/boost my post or pinned post rather. It means a lot!

hello! can you pls boost my post about my dog? tysm if u do!

hi ♡ can you reblog the post about my cat? tysm!”

The scammer will send several asks at once to many different blogs and wait to see how many will answer and reblog their scam post. They rely on no one looking up the info the post has, because doing so would show that the post is not in good faith and has stolen it's contents from somewhere else. Those who have no searched the post will likely share it and their mutuals will also share it not knowing the post is actually a scam. Often, these scams do get found out fast but unfortunately some will fall for it. It is likely many have donated money before the scam is found out. If you get an ask or see someone reblog a post that looks suspicious, do the following in tumblr search.

Search the username to see if there's any warnings

Paste the ask and see if others got it

See if the listed paypal has pre-existing alerts for it

Checking the blog sending asks will likely show it is a few days old, though some cases may be an older blog that was broken into and reused and repurposed into a scam blog so the actual owner will never know of it happening since they likely abandoned the website.

Once you know a blog is a scam, please alert your followers by explaining it's a scam and detailing why it's a scam by showing blogs the scammer used that are gone now or linking to previous warnings. It's advised to then report the scam blog like so:

Report -> Something else -> Illegal Uses or Content -> Phishing

This is currently the only way to deal with scammers. I hope this info is detailed enough and useful to any who find it.