#this photoshoot hurt me so good
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honeycrispjamz · 2 months ago
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Just wanted to point out that all the girls are holding themselves in these vanity fair photos—
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—except for Misty and Natalie.
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I have different theories on why, obviously in Natalie’s case her older self is dead (big rip) so it’s a slight allusion to that missing piece of herself, her future.
But what about Misty? Her younger self isn’t even framed as sitting next to her older self, but instead peeking out from behind. In the other photo of the two Mistys, her older self is seen staring at us while her younger self looks towards her.
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Van’s close up shot also does this, but there’s a… clear difference in the framing.
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Van is looking at us, just like Misty, but her younger self is looking at her in awe. She doesn’t look curious, or even a little frightened like Misty does, instead she is fully accepting of this older version of herself.
I think this framing of all the girls (save for Misty and Natalie) represents how they have somewhat come to terms with this dark part of themselves. They (in the framing) treat themselves with almost a motherly touch, especially in Lottie’s and Tai’s cases. They have accepted they were scared, hungry children, who more than anything needed a loving embrace from someone who could understand their own individual pain, and who better to do that than themselves?
But not Misty. Her older self is closed off, unwilling to give her younger self this comfort she needs. She doesn’t accept the guilt she feels for what she did in the wilderness, no matter how much she makes it out like she’s fine. She is still holding on to her pain as deserved, not something she needs comforting for. It’s as if she knows her younger self was doing the violence out of a lust for it, not survival. But young Misty doesn’t see it this way— she only sees a survivor. She’s almost posed as a voyeur, like this look into the future she’s being allowed is something she knows she isn’t supposed to see, yet she can’t stop.
And Natalie… is hugging herself, because her older self never, ever, accepted the pain she inflicted out there.
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sam-moss · 7 months ago
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Heads up, if you presaved the new album on Spotify it *might* add LMB to your Liked Songs. Make sure to Hide it and all of the versions to both prevent that from happening AND to prevent you from streaming it on accident!
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please I want to buy the album without supporting the zionists😭😭
(i fear this because the accordian ver has lose my breath concept pics)
#it didn’t happen to me but ​I’ve heard some reports from moots on twt that this happened to them.#I’ve got my fingers-crossed that if anything it’s only on that one version so they can see just how badly we don’t want it 😭#but best case scenario they are just reusing the same photoshoot which I’ve seen some describe as gross behavior#my first thought was ‘maybe this will connect the photoshoot to this album instead of that song so the memories of the song can be#completely overwritten and we can ignore it ever existed!’ but I read an argument saying ‘no- it’s gross bc they reused a photoshoot JUST#to sell another set of photocards. they could’ve used a unique photoshoot completely unconnected to LMB’ which makes sense.#but also the whole ~multiple album versions and only a couple of different inclusions for each one so you’ll want to buy 100 of every#version to collect them all~ situation is gross and slimy anyway so I figured it was par for the course. still hate it tho.#I saw all this but I bought 2 versions of Golden Hour. I try not to be too intense on collecting or streaming but when it’s a once or twice#*say all this#a year excursion- I’ll splurge. I never really bought merch for ANYONE before last year but now there’s a Barnes and Noble near me#so I thought I’d start participating in the album buying thing. theyre good albums and inclusions Brent.#but if LMB is on this I don’t think I’ll get it. there’s never been a photocard I NEED to have and I can’t imagine it will be on this album.#and since I’m 12 tags down I might as well add that I don’t really care about streaming numbers most of the time- but I want this particular#song’s failure to send a message to JYP. unfortunately it’s not failing bc SEVERAL fans are streaming it out of ignorance/apathy or spite.#seeing people on twt blowing up the MV out of spite in particular really hurt. it was a well organized boycott w/ an easy target and it was#easy to avoid and it had solid purpose behind it- which most boycotts don’t have all those things!!! but sooooo many people supported it#anyway. it was really disheartening. At least tumblr seems to all be on the same page. May was an absolutely nasty time to be a twt Stay.#and now it’s resurging. maybe JYPE will make the right decision- even if it’s for the wrong reason. the effect will be the same.
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sturnioz · 7 months ago
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‘RAW’ — MATTHEW STURNIOLO
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pairing. matthew sturniolo x fem!reader genre. smut, established relationship au.
word count. 3.5k
❝so, i can just slide right in, feel you… fill you up…❞
content warnings. explicit content, starts with sweet!matt then spirals to pussy drunk!matt, unprotected sex, creampie, heavy use of the petnames 'sweetheart' and 'baby', dirty talking, matt is also kinda goofy in this.
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“I’ve missed you.” Matt mouths at your skin, his arms tight around your waist as he pulls you against his chest, breathing in the scent of your body wash and perfume as he nuzzles his head into the crevice of your neck.
You smile warmly, melting into his embrace as your fingers lace through his curls and he hums at the soft tugs you give, sucking and nipping at the spot where your neck and shoulder meet.
“Ow,” You hiss through giggles as Matt bites down a little too hard at your skin and your body angles away from him, only for him to whine and try to draw you back to him, muttering an apology against your neck as he tightens his hold on you. “We can’t stand here all day, Matt.”
Matt huffs as if what you’ve said is something so offensive that hurts his feelings, and his shoulders sag as he reluctantly lets you go, but slips his hand into your own instead, intertwining your fingers as he allows you to pull him to a more suitable place than your front door.
He drags his sock covered feet across the floorboards as he takes in your home, a comforting warmth spreads through his chest.
Matt misses being at your place; that sweet, familiar smell of a candle that was previously burning fills his senses, the hum of the TV playing your favourite show in the background, the subtle misplaced ornaments and potted plants that you’ve picked up to move or to admire. 
He takes a quick glance at your kitchen as he passes it, noticing a dish and bowl soaking in soapy water, and he smiles when knowing you have eaten already. He wonders if it was something delicious or filling for you. 
He wants to ask what it could’ve been, but the question remains on the tip of his tongue as you’re pulling him towards the direction of your bedroom.
And that’s when he feels most at home.
The bag that was once resting on his shoulders slumps to the ground and mindlessly kicked to the side as his body finally relaxes, the tiredness that he’s so used to pushing to the back of his mind comes front and centre as he sluggishly makes his way towards the unmade bed, sitting himself down on the edge. 
The hand that’s holding yours pulls you forward to stand between his parted legs, and he rests his cheek on your stomach as he embraces you like he once did a few minutes prior, exhaling happily as your fingers resume playing with his curly hair. 
“How was the trip?”
“Good,” Matt’s tone is quiet and gentle. “Nick was actin’ as our tour guide and was takin’ us to all these cool places,” He moves his head a little to look up at you, resting his chin on your stomach. “I took some pictures for you—ones I haven’t sent you yet.”
You’re more than eager to see what pictures Matt wants to show you, and you gentle push him up the bed for him to lay comfortably and he giggles, reaching his hand into his pocket to retrieve his phone while his arm curls around you, holding you close to his side and pressing his lips to the top of your head, finding comfort in the scent of your shampoo. 
He unlocks his phone, clicks the camera roll app and your eyes widen in excitement at seeing all the recent photos Matt failed to show you previously. 
You’re in awe watching him scroll through the photos; some of him and his brothers, amateur photoshoots, and the scenery and the colours of skies leaves you speechless, hanging onto every word as he tells you the story behind them all, some comical and others sweet and endearing. 
“Seein’ this one, like, reminded me of you, y’know,” He whispers against your head as he shows you a picture of a sunset, a blend of pinks and oranges making your heart flutter. “It’s pretty—calmin’, makes me feel at ease. It made me miss you even more than I already did, was killin’ me.”
“You called me every night.” You remind him, letting out a laugh as he groans and rolls his eyes, throwing his phone to the side before gripping your hips and pulling your body on top of his. He massages your thighs with his fingers, kneading the skin as they settle on each of his sides.
“You know it’s not the same,” Matt argues, tongue swiping across his bottom lip. “I love hearin’ your voice over the phone but, come on, havin’ you there with me physically means more to me. I get to hold you, I get to touch you… I get to kiss you.”
“Oh? Is that so?”
Matt hums with a short nod of his head before he lifts his head up to meet your lips in a short but sweet kiss, squeezing your thighs once you reciprocate and he grins against your lips when he feels your hands cradle his cheeks. 
Then, you feel it.
His hard cock pressing your inner thigh, twitching with each subtle movement of your hips as you rest your entire weight down on him, eliciting a grunt due to the pressure on his cock.
“Are you tired?” You pull away from his lips to ask him, biting back the smile that threatens to spread across your cheeks as Matt follows, wanting your mouth back on his. 
“A bit,” He admits, exhaling deeply. “But I don’t care. Just wan’ you.”
Warmth fills your chest, “You want me?”
“Yeah, bad. So bad.”
You don’t have time to swoon over his words as he’s already leaning up and reconnecting your lips in a much deeper kiss, biting down on your bottom lip and sliding his tongue into your mouth to glide across your own all while his hands sip around to grab at your ass, pulling you even closer so that you’re pressed against him fully. 
You kiss for a while, relishing in the way his lips feel on yours, familiar with the slow and unrushed pace he takes. Your hand curls around the front of his shirt, signalling for him to take it off immediately and he grins against your mouth, breaking the kiss for a moment to allow you to pull the material over his head. 
He gives you a toothy smile, his eyes twinkling with adoration as he stares up at you and his fingers twitch over the hem of your shirt, ready to take it off and you happily give him permission to do so, raising your arms in the air.
Matt tugs it off, throwing it carelessly to the side before his hands caress your skin, palms hot and clammy as he brings you in for another kiss, one that is more desperate and needy.
Matt’s moaning shamelessly into your mouth when your hands dip beneath the waistband of his sweatpants and boxers, your fist curling around his cock and giving him a few experimental pumps that has him almost draw blood on your lip when he bites down a little too hard. 
“Easy.” You hum with a giggle and Matt groans, craning his neck as he throws his head back against the pillows, tongue licking his bottom lip as your hand squeezes around his cock.
He lifts his hips as you begin to rid him of the rest of his clothing, and you awkwardly manoeuvre above him, laughing as you almost topple over but you remain seated thanks for the hold he has on your hips. 
“You go easy, sweetheart.” Matt teases you this time and you roll your eyes.
You drop your hands from his to finally peel off the rest of your own clothes and he watches you with hooded lids, one hand resting behind his head with the other wraps around his cock to jerk himself off as he takes in the sight of your naked body—something he’s seen plenty times before but he views it as if it’s the first time, absorbing himself in your curves, the swell of your breasts and your pretty pussy. 
You raise a brow, “Like what you see.”
Matt grins, “Always.”
You get a little shy at his compliment but continue to lean forwards to capture his lips in a kiss which he immediately reciprocates, his hand resting on the back of your neck to keep you still against his lips, and he moans as your tongue slips inside his mouth to touch his own. 
He’s still touching himself between your bodies, hips fucking up into his fist and gasping in your mouth when the tip grazes over your skin, the sensitivity sending goosebumps down his spine.
You pull away from his lips much to his dismay, and he tries to pull you back in but falters when he sees you making your way down his body, leaving a trail of kisses behind which makes him moan again, his mouth falling slack as he feels your tongue lick a clean stripe down his navel.
Your fingers brush over his inner thighs, smiling when his cock twitches against his stomach. You stroke further and further up his skin before your fingers grip his cock, hearing the slight hiss he makes through gritted teeth. 
You hum softly, leaning in closer to wrap your lips around his tip. 
“Ah—fuck, wait!” Matt suddenly speaks up and you stop in surprise, bringing your gaze up from his cock to his face, and he reaches his hand down to touch your cheek, his thumb caressing your skin. He looks like he’s in pain, but he explains; “I’ll cum too quickly if you suck my cock, seriously. I will cum the second I feel your tongue on me again.”
That makes you even more eager to shove his cock down your throat, and you tighten your fingers around the base which elicits a gasp from his lips. “I don’t mind.”
“But I do,” Matt weakly pushes your hand away, and his cock slaps back against his stomach. His hips jerk upwards at the sudden contact, “Oh fuck—sweetheart, I’ve been waitin’ for this for so long. I want to cum fuckin’ you—please, I just—” Matt winces as his hand comes down to cup his balls, almost as if he’s trying to stop himself from cumming right then and there from his own words. “I wan’ to fuck you, baby.”
You would awe at the sight if it wasn’t for the way he’s looking at you right now, so desperate and needy to be inside of you, and you’re more than welcome to give him exactly what he wants as you nod your head quickly, watching as his shoulders drop with a relieved sigh. 
Matt gently pushes you down on the bed to crawl above you, kneeling between your parted thighs and he almost drools at the sight of your pussy, glistening and ready for him to fuck.
He’s quick to lean over to yank open the drawers of your nightstands, digging his hand inside to search around for the box of condoms he knows you have ready for him when he’s over. 
Matt pulls out the box and leans back on his ankles as he dips his hand inside, and you wait patiently for him to pull out the packet and roll it onto his cock, but the way his body freezes in place and face drops, you know something is wrong. 
You grow concerned, leaning up on your elbows as you call out his name, “Matt?”
“No, no, no—fuck no,” Matt mumbles repeatedly under his breath as he turns the box upside down and shakes aggressively, praying that a condom will magically appear out of thin air and lay across the palm of his hand, but it remains empty. “Fuuuck, you’ve gotta be kiddin’ me.”
You gape at him in shock, “There’s no condoms left?”
“There’s no condoms left.” Matt echoes your words, and he throws the empty box down on the bed. 
He runs his hand over his face in annoyance, tears of frustration prickling at his eyes. You watch as his eyebrows knit together, how his jaw clenches and nostrils flare in anger. It was a sight you’re definitely not used to seeing, but it’s something that has your thighs clenching for some sort of friction below. 
“Hey… it’s okay,” You try to reassure him as his cheeks get a little red, and you reach up to stoke his arm. “We must’ve used the last one before you left for your trip without knowing.”
“I should’ve been prepared or somethin’, like, I should’ve bought a pack before coming here—I shouldn’t have relied on you to have the condoms but, fuck, I was just so fuckin’ excited to see my girlfriend that I didn’t even think about—”
“Baby, it’s okay.” You try to cut off his rambling by reassuring him again, but it seems to not work as he continues. 
“And now we have nothin’ and I’m just—” His hands wave over his hard cock comically, and you hold back a snort, watching as he runs his fingers through his hair with a sigh. “A’ight, I should just, like, make you cum on my tongue, and then I’m goin’ to jerk off in the—”
“No!” You raise your voice this time, startling Matt who stares at you with wide eyes, and you immediately apologise. “I’m sorry—sorry, baby. But.. you don’t need to do that, it’s okay.”
“Then what are we goin’ to do?” He questions with a whiny tone that has your head reeling and pussy begging to be fucked. The way he’s staring at you so desperately and in pain is enough for you to come up with an idea. 
“How about we just do it raw this time?”
Matt’s silent. 
He blinks.
He opens his mouth.
He closes it.
He blinks again. 
“Raw? Like, without a condom?” 
“Yes.”
“Sweetheart…” Matt sighs softly as his hands rub your thighs, “We can’t do that. We can’t risk anything, y’know, and even though I’m certain I’m goin’ to spend the rest of my fuckin’ life with you and start a family… we really can’t risk it. It’s too soon, and we’re both not ready for that shit either.”
You frown, “I know that. But nothing will happen, I promise. I’m on the pill.”
Matt’s silent again. 
He blinks.
He opens his mouth to croak out, “What?”
“I’ve been on the pill for a few months,” You tell him nonchalantly, and he looks at you as if you’ve kept such a big secret away from him. “Remember that night when the condom broke and we panicked?” Matt nods his head once. “I went on the pill the day after that. I didn’t want us to have another scare or anything.”
“You’ve been on the pill… for five months?” Matt asks you, and you hum to confirm it’s true. He gapes in shock, and his gaze flits down to your pussy in disbelief. “We could’ve done this five months ago?”
You struggle to hold back a laugh this time, the sound stifled by your lips. “Yes.”
“So, I can just…” Matt’s voice trails off as he shuffles forward, the tip of his cock brushing over your folds and you gasp as he presses over your clit, your thighs clamping around his hips. “I can just slide right in, feel you… fill you up…”
He’s mumbling now, some words incoherent while others are clear as day, his lewdness making your face hot. His cock nudges your opening, almost teasing you by not fucking you immediately and you bite back the urge to tell him to hurry it up.
You suck in a deep breath as Matt finally pushes into you, and his eyes grow wide, mouth slack as he feels the warmth of your walls fit snugly around his cock. His body is frozen above you, his cock pulsing as he feels you bare for the first time.
His eyes flit to yours and suddenly, his gaze darkens, his fingers pressing into the flesh of your waist.
You go to call out his name, to ask him if he’s alright but a surprised yelp flees past your lips as his hips snap forwards, burying himself deep inside your pussy. Your arms sling around his shoulders, gripping him tightly as he pants above you.
“Feels so fuckin’ good, baby,” Matt grunts under his breath, fucking himself into your deeper and you wail, locking your legs around his waist. “Feel so tight. All for me—yeah. Jus’ for me. So fuckin’ good. My pretty fuckin’ girl and her perfect pussy.”
You try to speak—to call out his name but you’re stuttering your words with each thrust. The bed creaks beneath your bodies, and the headboard hits against the wall, but you could care less about the noise, you’re too surprised to see the sudden change in your boyfriend's mood.
His tone and his words is enough to have you gaping at him, broken moans ripping through your throat at how fucking filthy he sounds, how he uncontrollably mutters how good your cunt fits snug around his cock and how we you are for him.
You’re not used to this.
You’re used to the sweet talk, the light feathery kisses he leaves on your skin in his path, the words of affectionate praises and gentle whispers of ‘i love yous’.
You’re not complaining, though. Never.
Seeing Matt’s switch up from fucking you raw for the first time has your mind spinning and electricity buzzing down your spine. Your fingernails dig further into his shoulder blades and your pussy clamps around his cock tightly, causing him to curse loudly.
“Fuck—that’s it. That’s it, sweetheart. Tight lil’ cunt squeezin’ me so fuckin’ good,” Matt whispers in your ear, almost sounding like a whine. “My girl. My fuckin’ girl.”
“Please,” You begin to beg, even though you have no idea what you’re begging for. “Please, please, please—”
“Gonna fill you up, fuck you full of my cum,” Matt drawls, his pace quickening as his cock drills into you, and his hands grip your waist tighter when he hears you moan for him. “You wan’ that? Yeah? Wan’ me to fill you up? Fuck this cunt full?”
You’re already letting yourself go just from his words alone, your orgasm crashing over you like an aggressive wave and your body seizes up, almost sobbing from the pleasure as he fucks you through it, thumbing at your clit without any signs of stopping.
Your pussy contracts around his cock, sucking him in deeper, squeezing around him tighter which causes his hips to stutter their movements, a grunt slipping past his lips before he leans back on his knees. His hands slide down your waist to grip your thighs, keeping you locked against him as he watches your cunt taking in his cock, ready to be filled.
“Good girl… keep doin’ that f’me. Feels so good, sweetheart.” Matt’s moaning under his breath, airy moans turning into whines as he feels your walls tighten around him, too overwhelmed by the feeling that he suddenly stills, a throating groan leaving his lips as he cums, filling you up just as planned.
Matt’s breathing heavily, mesmerised with the way he’s emptying himself inside you, watching as his cock twitches as his cum fills you up. He doesn’t pull away until he’s certain that there’s nothing else left to give, and he winces out of sensitivity as he slowly moves back to pull out, his cock laying limp against his thigh.
“What was that?” You breathe out heavily as you lean up on your elbows to look at him. “Where did that come from?”
“I dunno,” Matt mumbles, his cheeks blossoming a reddish hue as he refuses to meet your eyes—that shy and sweet persona falling back into place. He can’t seem to tear his gaze away from your pussy, his lips parted as his fingers delicately stroke your pussy folds. “Was I too much, though?”
“No,” You quickly shake your head to reassure him. “I liked it.”
“Yeah? You did?” Matt finally meets your gaze and you smile at him as you nod your head this time. Matt sheepishly grins back and his eyes flit back down to his fingers that circle around your hole that leaks with his cum, and he makes the sudden decision to push it all back in, causing you to gasp and whine softly. “Sorry… jus’ don’t want anythin’ to go to waste.”
You laugh lightly at his words, “Go to waste?”
“Mm,” Matt nods his head, retracting his hand and staring at the cum that covers his fingers, that dark expression taking over once again as he looks right at you. “I’m never wearin’ a condom again… y’know that right?”
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© sturnioz
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seiwas · 2 months ago
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you're the reason (i got a weakness) | miya atsumu
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wc: 2.9k
summary: it’s not that atsumu doesn't like you dressing up like this—in fact, he loves it. just not when you're fighting. not when he can't even call you "baby".
contains: post-timeskip atsumu, arguments and atsumu feeling really sorry, flashbacks, uses the nickname “baby” & “my love”, reader is described as “pretty” and wears heels, hurt/comfort.
a/n: atsumu isn’t a sucky boyfriend he just gets carried away sometimes. song inspo: can you blame me? - kehlani, lucky daye.
part of the in's and out's new year/birthday event | request prompt: making yourself look good to feel good (your partner has something to say to you)
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sponsored by @itskilau and @tasoyoru for the @ficsforgaza initiative. please check it out and support if you can!
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“Bab—”
Atsumu lingers by your bathroom door, eyes drooping lower and sadder than they ever have. The steam makes the bleached strands of his hair cling to his forehead, his thick eyebrows now damp and flattened. 
You sigh, the big, heavy, and deep kind, shoulders dropping as you clasp the lock of your necklace.
He stares. 
That’s his job. You always ask him to do it the moment you step out of the shower. 
His lip trembles, eyes watery.
“Not now, Atsumu.”
You walk past him as you adjust the towel around your chest, your arm brushing against his. It’s a small thing, a sensation ingrained so deeply into the past two years you’ve been together, but he feels it like it’s the first time you ever touched him—and in a way, it is. Since yesterday, at least. 
The silence that trails after you is so deafeningly still, he thinks he can hear his heart breaking. 
“Atsumu,” your voice rings. 
Who the hell is “Atsumu”? 
He’s not supposed to be “Atsumu” to you. He’s “Tsum.” He’s “baby.” He’s “my love.”
Anything but “Atsumu.”
When you close the door of your walk-in closet to change, the metaphorical volleyball of hope floating right into the palm of his hand misses and drops straight to the floor. 
It started with volleyball, as all things with Atsumu do. 
You’d met him at the rise of his career, just a few years of him being pro. You were friends first, but if you ask anyone around Atsumu, they’d tell you you were never just a friend to him; he’d invited you to all his games and practice matches, spent a bit more time in the locker rooms before going out for dinner with you and the rest of the team. 
Osamu has the receipts of all the extra orders of onigiri Atsumu started adding to his regular weekly subscription since meeting you. 
Your first ‘date’ was Atsumu treading the very fine line between teaching you how to play volleyball and teaching himself self-control. Keeping an eye on the ball is hard enough, what more when he has to resist staring at you in very cute volleyball shorts too? 
As MSBY’s success skyrocketed, so did Atsumu’s—brand deals left and right, solo work trips during off seasons, commercials; the whole thing. When Atsumu wasn’t training, he was either traveling  or attending events and photoshoots. Always on-the-go. Moving. 
And he knew you understood, knew you knew him and his tendencies to overwork; knew him, and his habit of getting stuck inside his own world. You’d driven to late practices with bento boxes to share, and you’d packed his gym bag more than a few times, brought in extra clothes without him having to say a word.
You’ve managed his lifestyle better than anyone could.
But, Atsumu has a bad habit of promising more than he should, of serving white lies just as easily as he does volleyballs behind the service line. 
“Won’t take long, baby. Swear it,” he holds on to the wall by your door, slipping his feet inside his dress shoes. “Pick ya up at 6:00?” 
He’d winked at you then, kissed you between your eyebrows and nose before sneaking one more right at that spot underneath your ear.
What he’d give to be able to do that right now. 
“Okay,” you giggle, swatting his chest as you nod, “better hurry then, you might be late.” 
When Atsumu remembers that moment, the way you’d agreed so doubtlessly, he hates himself even more. You trusted him, have trusted him so wholeheartedly this entire time, so maybe you’re right—
“Would it hurt for you to just be honest?” 
—Atsumu has no excuse standing you up on the date he promised you weeks ago all because he lost track of time in some brand event, listening to a potential collaboration on volleyball shoes. Atsumu has no excuse agreeing to “some drinks” right after just to meet the executives of the company. 
There are meetings for those things, ones that can be scheduled and agreed upon. Ones that don’t compromise or add on to the already long list of missed dates with you. 
“I know you’re busy and I understand,” you sigh, turning the knob of the kitchen stove as you heat up the kettle, “you know I do.” 
He stands before you a quarter past 11:00 p.m., cologne long faded and the smell of alcohol spilled on his sleeve. The kitchen island stands like a net on the court, the ball being sent over to his side. 
“Baby, I—”
He passes it back.
You turn from the stove, face fresh and hair tied into a messy low bun as you look at him—how could he have ever stood this–you–up?
You take the ball, “Can I finish what I have to say first?” 
He nods. The kettle begins whizzing.
“I’m happy and so, so proud that you have all these opportunities,” you reach for the cupboard above head to grab a mug. The box of tea bags sits to your right, a mix of Lemon Balm and Chamomile that Atsumu swears keeps his anxieties at bay during the night. “But at least tell me if you can’t make it.” 
You tear open a tea packet, dangling it inside the mug. The kettle whistles, and he feels the onset of a spike. 
“Please don’t keep my hopes up every time.” 
You turn back towards the stove, turning the burner off as you pour in the steaming water inside the mug. 
“Baby, I swear, they just–they started talkin’ ‘bout these shoes, ‘n I thought t’was cool, ‘n the execs–they said the execs’d be there in the afterparty, and—” he breathes, “won’t happen next time, baby. ‘M so—” 
“Can I really believe you next time?”
You approach the kitchen island slowly, holding the piping hot mug carefully as you set it down in front of him. 
Atsumu stood you up on your date, and you still made him tea. 
You hold his stare for a brief moment before you walk away, sadness and disappointment all-in-one.
It is now that Atsumu knows, he’s fucked up.
The ball lands on his side of the court. 
And so, he’s spent this entire day trying to make it up to you—breakfast in the morning, right before training (which he absolutely tanked because all he could think about was how sad you looked the night before); flowers that he brought home after lunch time, just to find the apartment empty. It’s only after a full text thread and three missed calls to your phone that he finally gets a response.
“Nail appointment. Going out tonight,” is your reply (using speech-to-text too, he suspects, with how formal it sounds). 
Which is fine and dandy to him; you should do everything that makes you feel better after he practically took you for granted. It’s just—he hasn’t even said sorry yet, can’t even call you “baby”, can’t even touch you even though he really, really, really wants to. 
And now, with you closing the door on him while you’re changing—there’s nothing else he can do, really, but to walk away and give you some space. 
He shifts his feet, dragging them lightly against the wooden floors of your bedroom.
The moment he hears the door of your walk-in closet slide open, he hurriedly sits down on the edge of your bed, acting as if he wasn’t just anxiously pacing, waiting for you to come out. 
He feels like shit, if he’s being honest—like how he does when he misses a serve; if not, worse. 
You look good. Make-up done to only emphasize the features he loves (which is your entire face, really), and your outfit perfectly accentuating the dips and curves of your body. 
He follows you as you exit the room, tailing after you like a lost puppy. When you stop by your entryway, all he can do is watch as you bend down to put on the straps of your heels. And it sucks, because if you weren’t fighting, Atsumu would be right by your feet, crouched low so that you wouldn’t have to. 
It’s pathetic and a little helpless of him to just stand and stare in the middle of your living room. He should say something at least, but, you just look so good, and his throat feels dry; his heart all achy and stomach twisty. 
He doesn’t want to be away from you. 
And it’s not that he doesn’t like you going out looking like this—he loves it. But as soon as you step out the door with a soft “don’t wait up for me” mumbled from your glossed lips, Atsumu can only taste bitter regret at the fact that he wishes he were coming with you. 
He couldn’t even give you a goodbye kiss. 
The blond groans, pulling at his hair as he rests his elbows down on the kitchen counter. 
“Don’t wait up for me,” you said. As if he can even sleep without you around. 
.
.
.
The hours go by but they feel like days. Atsumu’s done every possible thing he can do in this apartment and it still hasn’t breached 11:00 p.m.. He’s cleaned down the kitchen (twice!) and arranged the food inside the fridge like those ‘stock up my fridge with me’ tiktoks he’s seen on Sakusa’s phone. The clothes on his side of the closet have been arranged by color and length, with all the ones in his dresser refolded, Marie Kondo style. He’s also pretty sure he’s scrubbed the bathroom down enough that you can probably see your reflection on the tiles of the damn thing. The laundry baskets for both your clothes are now empty, and he’s changed the bedsheets too and—
He’s still restless. The numbers on the clock taunt him, moving up agonizingly slowly. He can’t stop looking at the time, itching for you to come home. 
Atsumu is sorry, so so so incredibly so, because you’re right―he hasn’t been fair to you at all, and he needs you to know that he knows it, too. 
His eyes go over the clock again, only a minute having passed since the last time he checked it. 
Is this how you felt? Every time you waited for him to come home for a date he promised you? 
He squeezes his eyes; it hurts him just thinking about it. 
That’s it, he decides, grabbing his phone and wallet as he walks out the door. 
.
.
Atsumu doesn’t check your location often (maybe only a few times). It’s not a trust thing, he swears; it’s just for when he wants to make sure you’re somewhere safe, or in a place he can reach you should you need him there. 
And, you clearly don’t need him right now, but, Atsumu is a little selfish, he admits. 
Sitting at home with all his regret feels worse than seeking you out to beg for your forgiveness, whether you want him to or not. 
He’s barely dressed for the venue as he steps inside the bar, a pair of sweatpants and a white t-shirt with those fashionable Birkenstock clogs on. A few people seem to recognize him, tilting their heads and murmuring among themselves as he walks through door, but none of them approach him, thankfully, except for a server asking if he needs assistance. 
His eyes scan the tables first, searching for any semblance of the outfit he’d seen you leave in earlier. The dim lights make it increasingly difficult for him to look for your properly as he squints his eyes some more, narrowing his vision to the people at the front bar this time. It’s after the fourth person he dismisses that he feels himself getting desperate, nearly turning towards the server beside him to ask for help.
Until he spots you—tucked in the corner of the front bar, sitting on the barstool with your legs crossed as you swirl around your drink. 
You look bored, and a little sad, chin resting in your hand as you lean your elbow on the table. 
He frowns, thanking the server on the side as he makes his way to you slowly. You barely notice him as you bring out your phone, tapping on the screen as you stare at it almost longingly―a photo of you and him some time ago after one of his games. He knows it well, can still remember that day so clearly: when he became a PR nightmare because he couldn’t help but announce your relationship by kissing you in front of everybody. 
It makes his chest hurt. 
Then, you swipe it open, and he’s close enough now to be able to catch a glimpse of what’s on your screen: your text thread with him, his last message being, “Did you make it safely?” 
(You pout, eyes pricking with tears. You didn’t reply to him then because you weren’t ready to fully talk to him yet, still upset and disappointed. 
It was easy to make yourself feel better by dressing up and stepping out of the apartment earlier, the promise of good drinks and good company awaiting your arrival; you couldn’t think about how you felt if you were busying yourself with others. But now that all of those feelings have died down and most of your friends have started chatting up other people they’ve found, it’s beginning to hit you all at once just how much you still prefer Atsumu’s company more than anything else.
Your fingers hover over your text box, typing and deleting. Typing and deleting.) 
He’s two stools away from you now, and he can barely contain it―
“Baby,” his voice trembles, unsteady. 
Recognition fills you as you turn to the sound, half-confused at whether you’re hearing things; whether―
(“Tsum,” you mutter, eyes catching a pair of familiar warm brown staring back at you. His bottom lip quivers, the embodiment of a dam starting to crack, vibrating.
Your emotions are a mess, your breath on hold as you feel tears welling up in your lashline too. You still feel upset, still a little sad, and a tiny bit disappointed, but what coats them all is a sense of relief because—)
―he’s here, standing in front of you like he just rolled out of the house with barely enough time to get dressed (which, you’re sure is exactly how things went), and you’re sliding off the bar stool in the prettiest outfit, looking like the prettiest thing he’s ever seen. 
“‘M so sorry,” he breathes out, stepping closer as he grabs your hand, “Don’t ever wanna make y’feel like that again.” His knee gives way as he starts sinking to the floor, “I won’t do that anymore―” 
“Tsum,” you try to call his attention.
He’ll beg for your forgiveness whether you like it or not. 
(The interaction is causing nearby tables to look, murmurs and whispers in your periphery as you catch vague sentences here and there. He still is a public figure, after all.) 
But Atsumu is unaware, looking at you and you alone as he pleads, “No, please hear me out first. I promise I’ll tell ‘em they can speak ‘ta―” 
“Tsum,” you squeeze his hand, whispering more firmly as you try to pull him up. 
“Baby, please. Gimme the chance ‘ta show ya that I―”
(You look around and notice even more eyes on the two of you, fond looks on their faces as they prepare their phones for what seems like something momentous. Then it hits you, how this looks―)
“Tsum, please stand up,” you tug at his hand strongly, urging him to stand. His eyebrows furrow as he obliges, only comprehending why when you explain it to him softly, “people were starting to think you were about to propose.” 
He pauses for a moment, a slight, “Oh,” as he ponders on it. “Well, if that’s what’ll prove it t’ya, then—” 
You roll your eyes, the corners of your lips curling slightly as you hit his shin with your foot and squeeze his hand again, “Don’t joke about things like that.” 
Well, it’s not the first time it’s crossed his mind, if he’s being honest. 
He sighs, sitting on the stool beside you as he rubs his thumb over your hand again, bringing it close to his lips to kiss softly. 
“‘M really sorry, baby,” he mumbles against your skin before moving your hand over his heart. “Don’t ever want ya feelin’ like this again.” 
“I know,” you give him a small smile, patting down some of the strands of his hair that stick out, “you didn’t have to come out here though, you know. I was about to go home soon, anyway.” 
“Can ya blame me? Seein’ ya off like that?” he grips your hand tighter as his voice softens. “Y’re too pretty to be sad,” he plays with your fingers, intertwining them with his.
You hit his shin again, feeling shy. You always do when Atsumu likes to sweet-talk you. 
“Do ya forgive me?” he asks after some time, as you take the last few sips of your drink. 
You hum, looking him in the eyes as you nod, pouting, “I don’t like being mad at you, you know.” He lights up, beaming, but you add on, “We still have to talk about it properly, though. Later, when we get back.” 
He nods in agreement, holding your hand as you slide off the barstool, guiding you out of the bar and into the car. 
.
.
(You both do talk about it properly, and the next time Atsumu promises you a date, he blocks it out of all of his calendars, sending the date to his manager even, just to be extra sure.) 
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a/n: this has been such a long time coming, i'm sorry to those who waited! i hope you enjoyed even though this simmered with me for way too long 😭 i love writing atsumu a little lovesick but i also think he deserves someone who is equally as in deep as he is 🥺
thank you notes: to 🍧 anon for helping me figure out "what would make you mad at atsumu?" and to @ceroseis and @mieiri for always listening to my shenanigans pre-writing!
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comments, tags, and reblogs are greatly appreciated ♡
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moonlight-records · 4 months ago
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Princess Backpack | LN4 (SM AU!)
pairing: lando norris x biker!reader (they/she pronouns!)
summary: an f1 driver and a biker finally take their crushes off of social media
warning: minor suggestive if you squint
FC: none!
a/n: for @norrisleclercf1 as a treat for passing your exam!
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yourusername tagged serpents_unite
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liked by yourbestfriend, serpents_unite, and 1.1m others
yourusername late night rides are the best rides @ serpents_unite
view all 846,043 comments
user204 YES MORE BIKING CONTENT
user73 WE ARE SOOOO!!!
yourbestfriend QUEEEEN!!!!
↳ yourusername right back at you 😉
user402 THE WHIIIIITE BIKE!!! UGH SO HOOOOT 😫
user49 WAR IS OVER WE ARE BACK!!!!
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landonorris
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liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, oscarpiastri and 1.3m others
landonorris it's race weekend so have some throwbacks 😉
view all 982,305 comments
carlossainz55 please tell me you were careful
↳ landonorris of course
user694 YESSSSSSS
user025 UGGGGH SO FIIIIIINE 😫
user739 it's criminal these are throwback photos and this is the FIRST time I'm seeing them cause GOD DAMN 🥵🥵
oscarpiastri you forgot to post when you almost fell off
↳ landonorris hey oscar, HUSH! ↳ carlossain55 HE WHAT? ↳ landonorris NOTHING!!!
yourusername oh to be that car or under the car but remove the car--
landonorris liked this comment ↳ user597 YOU'RE SO RIGHT ↳ user973 wish this was twitter so i could retweet this ↳ user024 not lando liking the og comment ↳ yourusername HE WHAT? OH MY GOD I HAVE TO GO INTO HIDING
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yourusername
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liked by yourbestfriend, landonorris, and 839,205 others
yourusername The choke hold this sport has all for a silly British McLaren driver 😫
view all 506 comments
user20 OMG! You watch F1?!
↳ yourusername I do!
user256 What sport is this?
↳ yourusername Formula one! ↳ user256 interesting! Is it free in the US? ↳ yourusername Outside the three American circuits on ESPN, sadly no. You can pay for F1TV for all the fun perks but you should totally NOT look the many sites to pirate it for free. DON'T do that 😉 ↳ user256 good 📝 to 📝 know
yourbestfriend ME AND YOU BOTH
↳ yourusername it's horrible. we should go for a ride ↳ yourbestfriend PLEASE!!!
user39 God this season has been so SILLY 😭
landonorris sorry? lol
↳ yourusername AOPJFOIEA HA IT'S FINE ↳ landonorris oh good 😉
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yourusername
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liked by landonorris, yourbestfriend, serpents_unite, and 1.3m others
yourusername everyone meet Shelly ☺️ still sucks I have no backpack 🙄 backpack applications are opened
view all 485,205 comments
user024 SHELLY IS SO PRETTY UGGGH 😫
user694 the photoshoot is about to fucking SLAP I JUST KNOW IT
yourbestfriend AM I CHOPPED LIVER TO YOU?!
↳ yourusername NO BUT YOU'RE BUSY RIGHT NOW 😔 when will my wife return from war? ↳ yourbestfriend so my darling 🫡
user495 OH TO BE YOUR BACKPACK!!!!
user053 I would KILL to be your backpack
landonorris are applications still open?
yourusername liked this comment ↳ yourusername i mean...yeah 🫣 ↳ landonorris where do I sign up? ↳ user035 OH??? 👀👀👀 ↳ user347 who is trying to WOO OUR BIKER?? ↳ yourbestfriend 😏
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landonorris tagged yourusername
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liked by yourusername, maxverstappen, carlossainz55, oscarpiastri, and 1.5m others
landonorris i am certified passenger backpack now 😚��
comments on this post has been limited
carlossainz55 amigo you stress me out
↳ landonorris I AM BEING SAFE ↳ yourusername little offended you think i am unsafe driver ↳ carlossainz55 no no i have seen your videos. you are a safe driver. muppet here has a habit of getting hurt no matter what ↳ landonorris CARLOS!!! SHUT UP!!! PLEASE AND THANK YOU!!!
maxverstappen oh god here we go
↳ landonorris NOT YOU TOO MAX 😔
yourbestfriend hurt them, and I run you over 😇
↳ landonorris wasn't planning on it but message received ↳ yourbestfriend good! ↳ yourusername THATS MY WIFE 🗣️🗣️ ↳ yourbestfriend YOU KNOW IT!!
yourusername you do make a cute backpack ☺️☺️
↳ landonorris you know it babe 😉 ↳ carlossainz55 BABE? ↳ maxverstappen you got a PARTNER? ↳ yourusername guess cat's out of the bag now.. ↳ landonorris haha yeah...well look at the time! Gotta run!
1K notes · View notes
ultraintrovertedgryffindor · 7 months ago
Text
𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐋𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐓𝐨 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐞
this fuckin Esquire photoshoot has me so feral istg
Summary: You were Helaena's best friend, but her brothers were more than a little interested in you.
Warnings: Modern!AU, mutual pining, tension, angst, eventual fluff, hurt/comfort, slight whump, brief descriptions of domestic violence (from a Lannister), SMUT (MINORS DNI), wet dreams, masturbation, threesome (M/M/F), oral (f and m receiving), praise kink, fingering, p in v sex, anal sex, double penetration, spitroast, and multiple creampies
word count | 7.6k🤙🏻
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It had been a couple years since you and Helaena Targaryen became best friends. You both met at university, sharing multiple classes and you just clicked, having similar interests and sharing the same sense of humor. It wasn’t long before she had invited you over for a family night at their estate, meeting most of the family, along with her brothers. 
At first, Aemond didn’t really pay you any mind. He was withdrawn, cautious, even a bit suspicious, as he usually was, though he appreciated that you must’ve been a good friend to his sister. Helaena was never the best at making friends, considered odd to most, so it was a shock to everyone when she said she was bringing her best friend over for a couple nights. You seemed pretty shy yourself, so Aemond made no effort into getting to know you, besides keeping an eye on you to make sure you didn’t cross any lines. Though, that changed after a while.
It took him a few months to start warming up to you, and even then he still wasn’t comfortable being left alone with you. You weren’t quite past the small talk stage, and Aemond absolutely despised small talk, though he was never one to have deep conversations with borderline strangers either. Helaena kept trying to convince him to talk to you sometime, stating how wonderful you were to her and how you’d be a wonderful friend to him as well. So, only for his sister, Aemond started trying to get to know you.
After another couple months, Aemond cursed himself for not trying to get to know you sooner. You were very pleasant to be around, you were kind like Helaena, thoughtful and above all, could keep up with his talks about philosophy. You had very strong opinions, a better word would be convictions. He’d never admit to it, but Aemond admired your sense of justice and how you thought the world should be, even if there were certain aspects of your opinions he’d never believe himself. You listened to him when no one else would, spoke plainly when anybody else besides his family would be too afraid to. It wasn’t long before he gained feelings for you, even though he knew he shouldn’t have. It was hard not to, with you being around almost all the time. Though, that came with another problem.
Aegon.
Though completely different to his brother in almost every way, Aegon did share some similarities with Aemond. When you first arrived with Helaena, Aegon was indifferent. He cared about his family no matter how much he tried not to, so any outsider always put him on edge. But whereas Aemond would be completely withdrawn and prefer to observe, Aegon would be the opposite, trying to talk to you any chance he got, trying to figure out what your game was, if you had any malicious intent with his sister. It was infuriated when he couldn’t find any flaw, any hint that you may have been using them. He cornered you that first night, putting on his favorite mask to try to overwhelm you with accusatory questions.
And despite all of Aegon’s antics, he never scared you away and you never faltered. He got a lashing from Helaena afterwards though, accusing him of trying to scare away her only friend. He rolled his eyes at that comment, he was just trying to see if you were good enough for his sister, that’s all.
Aegon kept an eye on you every time you’d come over, making sure you didn’t nick something from the family. Helaena told him you weren’t like that, not like the company he kept sometimes. Aegon never had a single friend that didn’t try to steal something or ask for money, all of his “friends” were just using him. So maybe he was projecting a little, but he told himself he was just being safe.
To Aegon’s surprise, you had turned the tables on him, cornering him in his own home, asking what his problem was. Truth be told, Aegon was just scared, scared of another person coming into their home just to use them for their money and status to just discard them when they were done. He was more than a little paranoid, he was traumatized. Most of the time, it was Aegon’s fault something was stolen from them. He trusted people too easily, made too many best friends with the wrong people. His own mother threatened to kick him out if he didn’t stop making mistakes; so he quit making mistakes. He wasn’t going to let you be another mistake, even if it would be Helaena making it and not him. He had a feeling he’d be blamed for it anyway, as he often was when something went wrong. He was tired of being the scapegoat, and he hated you for coming there and threatening to undo all his progress.
But you weren’t there to unroot his progress, or take anything from anyone, you just loved being Helaena’s friend; and you wanted to be friends with her siblings as well. And Aegon slowly started to realize that. It took him a while, but he started to see you as you truly were: Helaena’s best friend, close like sisters, looking out for one another. Like Aemond, Aegon hated that he didn’t believe his sister’s kind words about you. He was so afraid of making the same mistakes, he made a completely different one, missing out of being your friend as well. Aegon quickly tried to make up for the lost time, but thankfully, you were happy to spend time getting to know him as well.
Like his younger brother, Aegon started to fall for you too, though neither of them realized it yet.
They were fucked.
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Aemond woke with a start, a cold sweat coating his entire body. He groaned as he felt the stickiness between his legs, knowing what must’ve happened, if his dreams were anything to go by.
He angrily kicked the blankets off of himself, feeling hot even though it was the middle of winter, storming to the bathroom to take a cold shower. He was embarrassed, he hadn’t had a wet dream since he was a teenager. He had so much control over himself for the longest time, so this felt like a slight to his own body. He needed to get laid, badly. It wasn’t for lack of options, Aemond knew he could get any woman into bed with him, there was just a very specific person he had in mind.
Helaena told him that you would be joining them for the holidays, your own family not doing anything to celebrate, so they didn’t mind you going tagging along, and Helaena was more than excited to get you all to herself during the festivities. Though, Aemond had plans to get you alone more than once over the course of the weekend. But what he didn’t know is Aegon was planning the exact same thing.
Aemond tore off all his sheets, bringing them to the washer, annoyed to find Aegon nearby. “Aw, did little brother have a wee accident? Did the little Aemy wet the bed? Mate, are you five?” Aemond glared at his older brother, if only looks could kill. Slowly, Aegon realized, much to Aemond’s horror. “Oh, nah, you creamed the bed!” He guffawed, almost doubling over from the force of his laughter.
“Shut the fuck up or I’ll tell mum you’re using again.”
“But I’m not!”
“And do you really think she’d believe you over me?” That shut Aegon up…briefly.
“So…does this little sticky situation have anything to do with her coming over for the holiday?”
Aemond narrowed his eyes at Aegon, tensing and balling his fist, ready to punch his brother’s perfect teeth in. “What makes you ask that?”
Aegon giggled, backing away slightly, having been on the end of one of Aemond’s punches too many times to count. “Come on, little brother. The way you reacted when Helaena told everyone she’d be coming over, it was like Christmas came early…and so did you, apparently.”
“You fuckin’ twat!” Aemond tried to shove Aegon, but he dodged too quickly.
“It’s alright, brother, I’ll take her off your hands if you can’t keep the little guys in!” Aegon giggled as he ran away, throwing a mischievous smile over his shoulder.
Pfft, as if…Aemond sneered.
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Besides Helaena, Aemond was the first to greet you as you exited the cab that drove you to their estate and you appreciated the modest welcome.
When you met Helaena, you had no idea her family was so…well endowed, so to speak. From her manners and how she spent her money, you’d think her family was more like yours, so you can imagine how shocked you were when you were invited to her family home for the first time, pulling up to a mansion on a huge chunk of land. It was like stepping into a fairytale. But most of the family you met was surprisingly humble. 
You were nervous about meeting her brothers, but Helaena assured you that they’d warm up to you eventually, they just had trust issues. And that they did, Daeron was no issue, considering he was studying abroad and rarely ever made it home for holidays. Aemond and Aegon, however, it was a race to see who’d warm up to you the fastest. It shocked you to see that the younger brother became friends with you first. It was very passive and slow, his opening up to you. You could tell he didn’t give information freely, and you would never be able to coax it out of him. He was like a cat, he’d come to you when and if he wanted. And when you finally gained his trust, he was like an open book. You never flinched when he showed you what was underneath his eyepatch, you thought he was beautiful and you told him so. He cried, and you held him. You liked to read together, discuss politics and human rights. You felt connected to him deeply, and you started to care about him as much as Helaena.
With Aegon, it was completely different.
When you first met Aegon, he was all over you, trying to find out all about you immediately, to the point you thought he was hitting on you. He was known for his promiscuity at the university you all went to after all, even when the campus was large, word liked to travel fast. But turns out, he wasn’t into you at all, just making sure you were “safe,” as Helaena worded it. It went on for months, feeling like you were being watched whenever you hung out with the Helaena. You were finally sick of it, confronting Aegon and telling him off without being too disrespectful. You thought you broke him for a moment, him just staring at you for the longest time but before you could turn to leave, he grabbed your wrist, quickly explaining himself, stating that he really only wanted to protect his family. He apologized for making you uncomfortable and that it’ll never happen again.
You forgave Aegon, and the two of you became fast friends. Soon, you started to hang out with all of them at the same time, but you had to remember you were Helaena’s friend first. She would always come first…even when you started to harbor crushes on her brothers. 
You knew it was wrong, but you couldn’t help it. You weren’t the most sought after person in the world, you didn’t really know what it was like to have people vie for your attention, so these two boys sent your brain into an overload. They seemed to constantly compete for your attention, to the point you thought your feelings may have been requited for either of them. But how would that even work? You often laughed humorlessly at yourself, what a fool you must be to crush on two men at once. But you did, and you hated yourself for it. So spending a whole holiday with them would be challenging.
“Welcome, welcome, welcome!” Helaena took you in her arms excitedly, a surprising strength making your breath escape your lungs.
“Crushing…lungs…” You heaved, giggling breathlessly when she finally let you go.
“Sorry, sorry, I’m just so happy you’re here. Aemond too, right Aemy?” She tugged on her younger brother’s leather jacket sleeve, an unperceivable smile decorating his lips, one only someone close to him could notice, and notice you did. “It’s felt like forever since you’ve been able to come over.”
“That it has.” Aemond added, taking your hand and placing a soft kiss to your knuckles, making you blush.
“Ever the gentleman, eh?” You tried laughing off your flustered state, pulling him into a hug, smelling his amazing cologne that always made you want to bite him. He held you close, the cold crisp air of the winter months barely noticeable with how warm he was against you. You shivered when he let you go, his warmth leaving all too quickly. “Freezing, let’s head inside, shall we?”
The Targaryens weren’t much of a hugging family, but Aegon was, and he gave you a hug that almost put Helaena and Aemond’s to shame. For someone who was never hugged much as a child, he sure knew how to give the best ones, you thought. “Hello, love.” He smiled, his bright white teeth lighting up the room, giving a polite kiss to your cheek. You were embarrassed how fast your panties soaked through.
Suddenly, Aegon was pushed away by Aemond, who put his arm around your shoulders. “I’m sure she doesn’t want your drool all over her.”
Aegon narrowed his eyes, but still kept a smile, albeit a bit more eggy than the genuine one he directed towards you before. “Says you, brother, you’re the one clinging to her now.”
And that’s how most of the holiday went, Aemond and Aegon constantly trying to spend time alone with you, which you never understood why. You even asked Helaena why they were being fussier than usual, to which she just responded with a mischievous giggle. It was a shame, but you honestly didn’t have that much time to spend with each of them alone, the family’s bread and circuses being too grand for anyone to have alone time. Besides, you were there for Helaena and you didn’t want to leave her side for anything. Even if you, in your heart, desired to spend time with her brothers a bit more. 
During the entire holiday, you needed to relieve yourself more than once in the privacy of your guest room. You brought yourself to your peak with your vibrator, imagining Aegon’s tongue gliding up your neck, kissing his full lips, his cock reaching the deepest parts of you as he taunts you to come for him. You also imagined Aemond, his large hand squeezing your throat as he fucks you from behind, his grunts in your ear and he spills in your womb, rubbing your clit and forcing you to climax over and over until you broke for him. Even, bashfully, having them both fuck you at the same time. You knew no one would ever find out your lecherous fantasies, but you still blushed thinking about it.
You were proud you survived the Targaryen festivities without slipping up and exposing your crushes, the hardest thing you’ve ever done. You really needed to get laid, and you didn’t like it but you knew you had to move on. You needed to go on one of those dating websites, get a quick fuck and maybe even find a relationship. And when university came back in full force and you were alone in your flat with nothing but homework and the spider that had permanently made a home in your coffee cup cabinet, you did exactly that.
Julian Lannister…hmm. He was handsome, for sure. Fit, blonde and blue-eyed…not the type of blonde you personally liked and his eyes were a dark blue that could’ve passed as a type of purple in the dark. He was conventionally attractive, and that was good enough for you. 
Swipe Right.
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Aegon heard a loud shatter from across the flat, his feet almost sliding across the wooden flooring as he ran to the source of the noise. “Fuck!”
His eyes widened as he saw the blood stained shards of a mirror scattered in a pile on the floor, seeing his brother’s enraged face glued to his phone. “Aemond?” He exclaimed. “What the bloody hell is going on? What have you done to yourself?” Aegon rushed to Aemond’s side, trying to gently grab his cut up hand, but he lurched away. “What’s wrong?”
Aemond didn’t say a word as he lifted his phone screen for Aegon to see. A text from Helaena. She’s got a boyfriend now. Aegon understood now, as he felt his heart sink in his chest and a similar rage bubble in his chest. But alas, he didn’t feel the need to punch a mirror like his idiot brother did. “Ah…so that’s why you decided to mutilate yourself, you twat?”
It took some convincing, but Aegon got his little brother to let him clean the wounds on his hands. “I fucked it all up…” Aemond mumbled.
Aegon sighed, wrapping a bandage around Aemond’s hand. “So did I. We had the whole holiday but we pussied out, no one to blame but ourselves. Woman like her, she was bound to be swept off her feet eventually.”
“It should’ve been one of us…”
“Yeah…but hey, we’re still her best mates, that’s not gonna change. I’d rather be in her life as a friend than not at all, yeah?”
Aemond nodded his head in agreement. “Just wish I could’ve shown her how happy I can make her, and how happy she makes me.”
“The future’s not set in stone, right? Sure, she has a man now, but that doesn’t mean she’s gonna stay with him forever.” Aemond chuckled. “What?”
“I think that’s the smartest thing you’ve ever said in your life.”
“Mmm, yeah, right, ruin the moment, why don’t ya?”
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“Baby, baby, please-!” You were interrupted with a slap from your boyfriend, the force of it shoving you to the floor with a cry.
“Don’t you dare “baby” me, slut! I knew you didn’t love me, you’ll never love anyone more than those Targaryen freaks! Hope you die in a ditch, bitch.” Julian stormed out of your flat, slamming the door so hard the picture you hung up of the two of you fell and shattered, glass flying everywhere.
It had been two months leading up to this moment. Two months since you started dating Julian, who started out as a one night stand, then a two night stand, then you started fucking every night until he asked you to be his girlfriend. In truth, you should’ve told him no, but the sex was decent and you desperately wanted to get over Aegon and Aemond. You led him on, and that was your fault. Now, you were paying the consequences. A bruise on your cheek formed quickly, and you cut up your hands picking up the pieces of glass in a sobbing fit. You deserved this, didn’t you? 
You needed to see your best friends. Honestly, you wanted to see your boys, but you knew that would not turn out well. You were in a bad state, you needed to talk to someone that wouldn’t judge you when you couldn’t control what came out of your mouth while venting. Helaena might be upset you had feelings for her brothers, but you knew ultimately you wouldn't lose her because of it. So to Helaena’s you went.
But what you didn’t know was that Aegon and Aemond were at their sister’s flat while she was at a study getaway with one of her classes, making sure her cat Dreamfire was getting proper attention. If you had known that, you never would’ve knocked on her door.
It was Aemond who opened the door first, his eye widening and brows furrowing in concern, seeing your tear stained face…and then the bruise. “What happened?” He almost growled, pulling you past the threshold into the flat before you could even protest. Aegon said your name in gleeful surprise, but his smile immediately fell when he noticed something was wrong. 
“I never should’ve come here.” You cried, trying to hide your face from the brothers.
“Hey, hey…” Aegon whispered, gently trying to pry your hands away from your face. “Did that Lannister prick do this?” You didn’t have to say anything for them both to know he guessed correctly, both looking at each other with a similar expression. “We’ll kill him.”
“No, please!” You quickly exclaimed, knowing that they could and get away with it. “Please, he’s not worth it. It’s over between us, I don’t want to waste any more time on him, please. Can I just…please, let’s just watch a movie or something, okay?”
Aemond pulled your weak form into a tight hug, his warmth calming you slightly. “We can do whatever you want, love. Right, Aegon?”
He nodded. “Yeah, of course.” He placed his large hand on your shoulder, smoothing the wrinkles on your shirt in a soothing motion. “We’ll always be here for you.”
Since that night, neither Aegon nor Aemond left you alone. If they weren’t in the same area as you, they were always texting you, making sure you were okay or if you needed anything. It felt like you had two husbands doting on you. The thought made you a little bit too happy. But one thing that worried you a little was how fast you heard of something bad happening to Julian. It didn’t even take a week for you to hear about him being in a motor “accident.” He wasn’t majorly injured or anything, but he had to stay in the hospital for a couple weeks before he could start physical therapy to learn how to walk again. You felt bad for how apathetic you were about the whole thing. You were just relieved he was out of your life.
You could spend time with your best friends without feeling guilty now, knowing you didn’t have a boyfriend to cater too. You could finally get yourself off without feeling like you were cheating in a way. You were free. But the downside, your crushes on Aemond and Aegon had only gotten stronger. You would have movie nights all the time whenever you weren’t busy with college or your job. You spent time with them and Helaena at the same time and it was lovely. You didn’t know how it managed to get this way, but they’d even spend the night at your flat sometimes. Not that you minded all that much, it just made it harder to act like a normal person who didn’t have extremely strong feelings for someone, or someones.
It often was the same way, you, Aegon, and Aemond all sitting on your couch watching some stupid movie, much like tonight. And like always, you sat between the two brothers. But something felt different, it felt more charged. Electrified. Maybe it was because Aemond had his hand on your thigh, squeezing occasionally, as if he hadn’t really noticed what he was doing. Or maybe it was because Aegon had his arm over your shoulder, leaning into you just enough you could smell his shampoo. You felt hot all over, and what made it worse, a sex scene in the movie started to play.
It was eerily silent, and you could’ve sworn you heard your heart beating wildly. Aemond squeezed your thigh so hard you shifted in your spot with a wince, making you lean into Aegon more, which in turn made Aegon squeeze your shoulder. You felt like you were going to start hyperventilating, so you did the only thing you thought to do. You quietly excused yourself, claiming you needed a glass of water. And you did, the cool liquid flowing down your throat with ease, but it only made you wish something else was flowing down your throat…
You were startled out of your thoughts by Aegon gently calling your name, “You alright there, love?”
“Oh, uh, yeah.” You stuttered, turning around and leaning against the counter. “Just thirsty.”
“Yeah, you seem really thirsty.” He smirked, coming closer to you slightly. “You sure you’re alright, you seem a little frazzled. Did something happen? Did Julian contact you? I sweat, if that bastard-”
“No, nothing like that Egg, I promise. I just…”
When you didn’t finish your sentence, Aegon walked closer and closer to you, your heart starting to race. You tried backing up but you were already pushed up against the cool counter of the kitchen, making it easy for Aegon to corner you. You felt your face heat up as you started to feel his body heat. You cursed yourself silently as you felt your clit start to throb, a wetness starting to leak out of you. “Is there something you’re not telling me, love?” He asked.
You didn’t say anything, but Aegon could tell what you wanted to say. Ever since you started spending more time with him and his brother, they figured out you must’ve had feelings for both of them. Aemond was the first to suspect it, as observant as he was. He noticed the way your pulse quickened whenever he held your hand as “friends.” He saw how your chest heaved whenever each of them got close to you, though Aegon never noticed before. But now, after hearing all over his little brother’s observations Aegon could see the lust in your eyes, saw how your chest heaved. He placed a hand just over your left breast, feeling how fast your heart was beating. 
“Aegon…” You whispered, and he couldn’t help but place his lips against yours. You couldn’t help the moan that escaped your mouth, a small tear running down the side of your face. Aegon’s hands ran up your sides, gently squeezing the fat that shaped the body he loved so much. Oh, how he wanted to lift you up onto the counter, pull your pajama shorts and panties to the side and shove his cock deep inside your heat as far as you could take him. But you were different, maybe he would’ve done that with someone he didn’t care for, definitely back when he was a troubled youth. No, he had to treat you with care, and also the deal he made with Aemond. He couldn’t have you all to himself, at least not yet.
Aegon let out a whine as he forced himself to pull away, leaving the both of you breathless. “If you hadn’t already figured it out, I have some pretty strong feelings for you, love.”
“Oh, Aegon, I do too…but-”
“Aemond. You have feelings for him as well.”
Your eyes widened. “How did you-”
“We figured it out some time ago, and we’re fine with it. We, uh…have some to an agreement, if you’ll hear us out.”
Before you could question anything he was talking about, Aegon led you back to the living room, where Aemond was sitting patiently for the two of you. “Please tell me you didn’t fuck it up.”
“I don’t think so?”
Aegon sat you down in a chair opposite of them, letting you have the space to back out if you needed. They didn’t want to overwhelm you just yet. Aemond leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, “So, I assume Aegon told you about our agreement?”
“Just that you had one.” You answered, which caused Aemond to shoot a glare at his older brother.
“I thought it would be best to talk to her about it together, dickhead.”
“Anyway.” Aemond growled. “Aegon and I…both have feelings for you, and we know you have feelings for us. It wouldn’t be fair to ask you to choose, so we’re willing to share you…if you want.” It was like a dream come true, no, too good to be true. You couldn’t believe it. Were you dreaming? You must’ve been dreaming. “Are you still with us?”
“This…is a lot.” You sighed shakily, but you knew what your body’s answer was, you just didn’t know how you could mentally handle it. “I do want both of you, but how would that work? I know how…uh, jealous you guys can be, especially of each other. How would you handle sharing me?”
Aemond and Aegon gave each other another one of those silent looks, one of those looks that spoke a thousand words without even opening their mouths. “You’re more important to us than our jealousy. We want you in our lives, and we’re willing to do anything to keep you here.” Aemond answered.
“So, if you’re willing, we want to make you happy. But if you don’t feel comfortable…we will understand.” Aegon spoke, but his eyes were pleading, begging that you’d agree.
In the end, you knew what your answer would be. You loved those boys so much, so you couldn’t imagine having to choose between one of them or choosing neither. Why not choose both?
“You…” You smiled shyly, “have my permission to share me.”
And like a switch flipped in each of them, gone were their nervous and hopeful expressions, they were now replaced with an almost predatory and lustful gaze. You could feel the weight of two pairs of eyes looking you up and down like a meal, your core clenching around nothing. You had never been more aroused than you had ever been in your life, you could practically feel yourself dripping. The feeling got even worse when Aemond stood up from the couch, sauntering over to you and leaning his hands on the armrests of the chair you sat in. You craned your head up to meet his gaze, your eyes heavy with desire as he bit his lip and groaned softly, like he was scared of letting himself go. His silver chain that he often wore snuck out of his shirt and dangled below his neck, and it was driving you crazy how sexy this man was.
Aemond chuckled darkly as he noticed you squeezing your thighs together, causing you to blush and look down, but he gently placed his index finger underneath your chin, lifting your gaze back to his. “Tell me what you want, sweet girl.” He whispered smoothly, his voice grazing over you like silk. 
You whimpered when he reached down to squeeze your thigh. “Aemond, please…”
“Please…what? Hm?” You huffed in frustration, your body so heady with arousal it was hard to put the images in your head to words. “I can’t help you if you don’t use your words.”
“Aemond.” Aegon interrupted, and you both looked over to see him watching in amusement at your interactions with each other. “Our poor girl is so needy she can’t speak properly. You’ve been around, what do you think she wants to ask of you?”
Aemond hummed, shifting his gaze back to you. “I imagine…our pretty girl wants me to taste her pretty pussy. Am I right to assume so?” You nodded quickly, the thought making you whine. “Not good enough, love. I’m going to need you to say yes or no for me.”
“Yes, Aemond! Please…” You whined.
“Oh,” Aegon chuckled, “look who’s using her words now?”
You tensed when Aemond started to get on his knees, clenching your thighs together. “What’s wrong?” He immediately asked, and you blushed, your reasoning a bit embarrassing. “It’s okay, you can tell me. Is this not what you really want?”
“That’s not it at all, I just…” You huffed, putting aside your nervousness. “I’d like to have my first kiss with you first…”
A beat passed, one that almost lasted too long before you started to feel even more embarrassed. But Aemond smiled, a genuine, toothy smile. It was a rare thing to see him smile like that. Most of the time, he smirked or tried to hide his teeth. But god when he really smiled, it was as beautiful as Aegon’s. Aemond leaned forward, still on his knees, so you had to lean down to meet him slightly. You wondered how his kisses would be different from Aegon’s. With Aegon, when he kissed you for the first time, it was heavy weighted and passionate, he leaned his whole body against yours, almost bringing you into a hug at the same time. You felt like you couldn’t escape his kiss in the best way. But with Aemond, at first his kiss was soft and light, like he was kissing someone for the first time; but when you met him with the same eagerness, he deepened the kiss by bringing his hands up to cup your face, tilting his head to fully slot his lips perfectly against yours. It was a gentleman’s kiss, but no less passionate. If you hadn't already been sitting, you would’ve gone weak at the knees.
Aemond pulled away from you slowly, a soft clicking noise as your lips broke apart. He hummed lowly, “I always knew you’d taste so good. I’m sure your other lips will taste just as sweet.” You gasped loudly as Aemond removed your shorts and underwear in one swift motion, his eye darkening as he saw how soaked you were already. “So wet and I’ve only kissed you. Come see, brother.”
Aegon all too eagerly crossed the room to witness your wetness, his grin making a pang of arousal surge through you so strongly it almost hurt. “Like a fuckin’ virgin.” He stood behind you as Aemond placed a soft kiss on your clit, making your back arch and head loll back against Aegon’s waist, his hands rubbing your shoulders as you whimpered from Aemond’s touch. “You gonna be a good girl for us?”
“Yes, Aegon.” You breathed out, then breathing in sharply as Aemond licked up and down your folds with a groan. “Fu…”
“Mmm,” Aemond groaned, “so sweet, just like I thought.” You bit your lip as he pressed two fingers inside you, a noisy squelch giving away just how turned on you were. “Fuck, baby, you’re so tight. Relax, or else you’ll never be able to take us.”
Aegon leaned down and started to kiss your neck, his hands reaching down to grasp at your hardened nipples. “Such a sweet girl, you’re doing so well for us, aren’t you? Taking Aemond’s fingers and tongue so well.”
You let out a borderline pornagraphic moan as Aemond thrusted his fingers inside you while flicking the tip of his tongue against your clit, Aegon’s finger roughly pinching your nipples getting you way too close way too fast. You wanted this to last so bad, but they didn’t show any signs of stopping and you weren’t about to stop them either. “Are you close already, beautiful?” Aemond asked, and you nodded. “Do you wanna come so soon? I can stop if you’d like.” He teased, sensing how desperate you must’ve been.
“No, no, please, Aemy, please. Please, I wanna come so bad. Please, let me come.” You sobbed.
“Didn’t even have to ask you to beg for it. Good girl. Come for me. Come on my fuckin’ fingers.”
You let out a strangled whine as your first orgasm washed over you, your whole body tensing and relaxing as your pussy contracted around Aemond’s fingers, your clit throbbing intensely as his tongue bullied it expertly. “Such a good girl.” You heard Aegon say, his voice sounding far away as you came down from your high.
“Did you like that, baby?” Aemond asked, palming his cock through his sweatpants. Did he even need to ask? “Aegon, you should have a taste too.” Your eyes widened, knowing how sensitive you are after you come. You wouldn’t be able to handle it. But that didn’t seem to matter to them, as Aegon quickly knelt to the floor, burying his face and tongue in your cunt, making you squeal.
“Fuck!” Aegon purred into you, fucking your pussy with his tongue, your eyes rolling to the back of your head in overstimulation, your mouth open wide practically drooling. Aemond took advantage of that, pulling his cock from his trousers and guiding it gently into your awaiting mouth, taking him eagerly.
“Damn, baby, your mouth feels so fuckin’ good, fuck…” Aemond groaned, restraining himself and making sure he didn’t fuck your face too hard, although you didn’t seem to mind. You were slobbering and moaning on his cock, the slight vibrations making his dick twitch from how good it felt, having to pull out before he released too early. “Need to feel that pussy around my cock.”
“I’m not fuckin’ done here.” Aegon growled, determined to make you come on his mouth.
“She’s too sensitive, she won’t be able to.” That comment from Aemond only seemed to spur him on.
“Are you doubting my abilities, brother?” You had to cover your mouth from screaming when Aegon started to suck on your clit, making you arch your back and twitch against him, not sure if you were trying to get away or push him closer. And you couldn’t believe it, but you were getting closer to another orgasm. Aegon’s mouth sloppily kissing and sucking your clit was too much, it was painful but you didn’t want it to stop.
You were writhing in your chair, Aemond having to hold you down so you didn’t fall off or hurt yourself in any way, the force of his hands holding you making your orgasm rise quickly burst out of you like a fountain, spraying onto Aegon’s face, who was grinning like Cheshire Cat. “Fuck, that was so sexy, darling. If I thought you could handle it, I’d make you do that again.”
“Please, don’t…” You chuckled breathlessly.
“Think you’ll be able to handle something else, then?” You nodded meekly. “Let’s take this to the bedroom, shall we?”
Aegon and Aemond led you on wobbly legs to your bedroom, kissing all over your body wherever there was naked flesh. Already two orgasms in, you were sensitive all over, your skin tingling and tickling from their kisses. You could feel each of their hard, throbbing cocks grinding against you. You reached out blindly, not knowing whose you touched until you heard Aegon groan. “Fuck, darling, you drive me crazy. Think you can take us?”
“Anything you want.” You moaned as Aemond cupped your breast, taking your nipple in his mouth and sucking harshly.
“I want to fuck that tight cunny of yours.” Aegon growled, flipping you over onto your stomach, making you face Aemond, his cock intimidatingly erect. You instinctively licked your lips, wrapping them just over the head of his cock, making him moan. You whined when you felt Aegon push into you slowly, his thick cock stretching your channel so deliciously, feeling every ridge and vein. You had to come off Aemond’s dick when Aegon bottomed out, your face contorting in pleasure. He wasn’t as long as Aemond, but he was so incredibly thick and you could tell you were going to be sore in the morning. “Gods, so wet and tight for me. You alright, love?”
“Yes.” You moaned, trying your best to suck Aemond off properly, your spit and drool running down your chin and drenching his balls. “Fuck!” You shouted as Aegon started a steady pace, the blunt tip of his cock hitting your cervix over and over. “So…deep…feels so good, Aegon.”
“Doing so well, like you were made for this.” Aemond moaned, starting to fuck your face gently, your gags and tears spilling from you spurring him on further. You probably thought you looked like a mess, but you were beautiful to him. To both of them. The way your brows furrowed when they went too deep, your face slightly red with blush and exertion, the pretty noises you made; they were cuntstruck.
“Fuck, gods, no, not yet.” Aegon grunted, his cock twitching inside of you. “Your pussy feels too good.” He moaned, wanting to slow down but ultimately pistoned into you with a force that made you surge forward and gag on Aemond’s cock deeper. Aegon let out a beautiful low groan as he came inside you, his hot sticky cum painting your inner walls white.
Before you could do anything, Aemond was pushing Aegon out of the way, quickly replacing Aegon’s cock with his, filling you to the brim immediately, causing you to cry out. “Her pussy’s that good, huh?” Aemond taunted, groaning loudly as he fucked you like he was trying to break you.
“Yes.” Aegon answered simply, laying next to you, lazily stroking his cock as he watched your facial expressions, wanting to get hard again. “Such a pretty girl.” He kissed you passionately, paired with Aemond’s thrusts made your head spin.
“Gods, I could fuck this pussy forever…” Aemond moaned, pushing the small of your back into the bed, forcing you to arch your back for him, his cock hitting deeper and deeper.
“Please…!” You whined obnoxiously, making the boys chuckle. You felt so out of it, the only thing registering was how good Aemond’s cock was making you feel. “Fuck! Ah!” You sobbed, feeling your uterus contract, another powerful orgasm starting to bubble up inside you.
“Can I fuck you again, darling?” Aegon asked softly, his cock already hard again and ready for you.
“No way, not now, not when I’m so fuckin’ close.” Aemond growled, keeping his body hunched over you protectively.
“I didn’t say you had to stop. If she’ll let me, I’d like to use that other tight hole of hers.” Your eyes widened, a deep pang of arousal surging through you like lightning at the thought of being so thoroughly filled by both of the men you loved. “It’s okay if you’re not comfortable-”
“Yes.”
“Uh, are you sure-?”
“Yes, Aegon! Please! I want you both to fuck me at the same time.”
Aegon smirked, looking at Aemond. “Well, you heard the lady.”
Aemond positioned himself under you so that you could ride him, while Aegon got behind you, grabbing a bottle of lube and applied some to your puckered hole generously, pushing a finger in slowly. You whimpered at the stretch, clenching around Aemond’s cock, causing him to grab your hips roughly. “Relax.” Then Aegon added another finger, then another, trying to match his girth to make sure you were prepared for him.
“Are you ready, pretty girl?”
“Please, Aegon.” You threw your head back against Aegon’s shoulder as he started to push in, the lube and the way he prepped you making it a not too terrible stretch. You could feel a stomach ache coming on, but gods, you didn’t want this to ever end. “Fuck…” You sobbed as he started to thrust into you gently, Aemond doing the same.
You never thought you’d pass out during sex, you couldn’t possibly believe it could feel that good. But these men proved you wrong, and you felt like you could collapse at any moment. You felt like a boneless fish, at the mercy of Aemond and Aegon, each thrusting with abandon, passing you back and forth like a game of tennis. All you could do was hang on for the ride and take it, moaning like a pornstar was all you had to put your energy in, not like you could help it.
Your third and most powerful orgasm came over you suddenly, wracking your body with chills and spasms, yelling so loud you were pretty sure you’d get noise complaints from your neighbors. But you couldn’t care less, with how amazing you felt, it was like an out of body experience. “Good fuckin’ girl, taking both our cocks so well.” Aegon moaned, kissing and biting your shoulder. “Fuck, gonna come again.”
“Me too.” Aemond moaned, “You want our cum deep inside both your holes, hm?”
“Yes, Aemond, yes! Come in me, please…” Both Aegon and Aemond let out deep groans, filling up both your holes with their cum, making you feel so full and complete. They both pulled out of you slowly, gently laying you down in between them on the bed. You shifted uncomfortably when you felt their cum leaking out of you, making a mess of your thighs and sheets. But it didn’t matter when they both cuddled up against you, making you feel so safe and secure.
“Are you okay, baby?” Aemond asked, caressing your cheek.
“More than okay.” You giggled, still breathless. You all were so sweaty, you’d all need a shower.
“That was amazing.” Aegon sighed, cuddling into your side like you were a teddy bear, his arm reaching over your waist while Aemond smoothed out your hair. “You were amazing.”
There was a beat where each of you just cuddled one another, steadying your breathing and taking in each other’s warmth. It was nice, almost as nice as the sex, but it didn’t stop you from thinking, “What happens now?” Your shy voice echoed in the now quiet room.
“Now?” Aegon mused. “Now, we do that again and again.”
Aemond rolled his eye at Aegon’s quip, continuing to smooth your hair down in a comforting manner. “Like we told you before, we both want you, and we’re both willing to share you. Like a polyamorous situation. We weren’t lying about how we feel about you, you know that.”
“If that’s alright with you, darling. We’d like to be your boyfriends, if you’ll have us. Our ancestor did the same thing…but the reverse…and with his sisters. So comparatively, this is normal.” Aegon chuckled.
Kissing both of their cheeks, you relaxed into their embrace. “Then yes, I’d love to be your girlfriend, both of yours.” You giggled when they both started kissing your cheeks, pawing at you like they wanted to go another round. “I can’t imagine the family gatherings won’t be awkward from now on.”
“They’ve always been awkward, love, that’s nothing to worry about.”
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didn't mean for it to be this long oops🙈
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vitalverstappen · 2 months ago
Text
To Be Your Muse SMAU - G. Russell
summary: as you and George navigate your relationship, you do the one thing you know how to: write a song.
pairing: George Russell x singer!reader
warnings: none
fc: Taylor Swift
written
masterlist
yourusername has posted
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liked by georgerussell63, maisiehpeters, ynsflowers23 and 963,942 others
yourusername: And with that, we have offically wrapped the European leg of the tour! Wembley, you were incredible every single night and I cannot wait to see what the rest of the tour brings. For now though, time for some rest
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user1: MOTHER
user2: best concert ever!!!!
maisiehpeters: ugh you look SO good in purple! liked by yourusername
sabrinacarpenter: so in love w you
yourusername: love you more bby 💜
user3: im so obsessed w their friendship it isnt even funny
user4: are we just gonna ignore GR in the likes? kinda sus
user5: probs nothing big. tons of athletes like her posts
f1gossip has posted
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f1gossip: Lando, George, Alex and Lily were all seen out at Y/n L/n's concert at Wembley Stadium tonight! All three drivers (and Lily) greeted fans while waiting for the concert to start!
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user6: my two worlds are colliding i am not okay
user7: how much are we betting that Lily and Lando's girlfriend dragged them there
user8: tbfh Lando probably dragged their asses there
user9: Lando's the biggest fan of her out of all of them bffr 😭
user10: the way George was getting into every song was SENDING ME
user11: its a shame he barely knew the words
user12: apparently they went to meet her backstage after the show
georgerussell63 posted a story
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captions: photo 1: "morning". photo 2: FP1, done. FP2, soon.
yourusername posted a story
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caption photo 2: "Oh hey George 👋"
story replies:
user13: you're at SILVERSTONE??
user14: girl wdyk about GR63
mercedesamgf1: thanks so much for coming! we loved having you!
yourusername: thanks for the invite! we'll have to do it again sometime!
georgerussell63: it was lovely seeing you again. would you be willing to make it another?
yourusername: are you asking me out over Instagram DM's? yourusername: but yes, i would love to
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yourusername: i hope you're in the mood for new music :) my new song risk comes out tonight at midnight EST!!
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user15: OMG OMG OMG
user16: girl you're supposed to be taking a break... not complaining about the new music though
oliviarodrigo: absolute banger like always <3 liked by yourusername
landonorris: surprised you didn't hurt yourself doing the leg kicks
user17: lando what are you doing here??
yourusername: oh like you could do them better
georgerussell: love the song!! can't get it out of my head 🩵
alex_albon: its true, every time i pass his garage its playing
yourusername: im flattered, i'll see you boys soon 🩵
user18: HUH?!!
user19: all three 2019 rookies being in the comments AND LEWIS in the likes is so sus???
twitter
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liked by georgerussell63, ynsrisk, gracieabrams and 942,630 others
yourusername: heard you guys liked the new single so much that i figured i'd give you another one. i've held onto this one for while, and i cannot wait to share it with you all. call it what you want out at midnight 🩵
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user20: OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG
user21: two songs??? in two months?? while on tour???
user22: we are getting fed
lilymhe: its so cute 🥹 haven't stopped listening to it
yourusername: awwe lils you're so cute
alex_albon: can confirm, its been on repeat all day
yourusername: as it should be albono
user22: stop shes befriended lily. girl is in somehow
user23: 🕵️‍♂️ hold on... the last time we saw the 🩵 it was with...
georgerussell: absolutely smashed it 🩵
user23: literally on cue wtf
yourusername: my muse made it easy to write
user24: the same photoshoot as risk??? what is goin on???
twitter
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radio interview
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in the media pen
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yourusername has posted
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liked by georgerussell63, lilymhe, landonorris and 989,924 others
yourusername: surprise! even though i've been traveling the globe, life has given me plenty of new people, ideas, and love to write about. things that would be unlike me to hide from the world. things that have given me so much joy in a world where joy is so hard to find. my new album best years is available to preorder now, and will be released friday at midnight. enjoy :) 🩵
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user25: A WHOLE NEW ALBUM??
user26: and it's all about GEORGE?!
landonorris: that's it. i'm convinced she doesn't sleep
georgerussell63: she doesn't
georgerussell63: she will literally wake up in the middle of the night and record ideas she got in her sleep
yourusername: you literally said you've never heard me do that??
georgerussell63: and i don't
yourusername: sureeee
lilymhe: time to pretend they're not all about how madly in love you are with george
alex_albon: they're how you feel about me!
lilymhe: 🤮🤮🤮
yourusername: pretend they're about me bbg
lilymhe: say less ;)
alex_albon: don't steal my girlfriend
user27: and its the same shoot from risk and ciwyw?? she's insane
yourusername has posted
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liked by oliviarodrigo, georgerussell63, ynupdates and others
tagged: georgerussell63
yourusername: you know i love a london boy 🩵🇬🇧
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user28: him repping the tour merch >>>
user30: MOTHER POSTING A BOY ON MAIN?? WHAT???
landonorris: @/georgerussell bad time to mention that you're not from london?
yourusername: shhhh he lives in london it still counts
georgerussell63: its the thought that counts
lilymhe: ahhhhhhhhh so happy!!!!
alex_albon: she has not stopped screaming since she saw the post
francolapinto: it's true, i can hear her from my garage
georgerussell63: i love you 🩵
yourusername: i love you too, georgie 🩵
user31: GEORGIE?? im sick im dying im dead
user32: this post called me single in so many languages
georgerussell63 has posted
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liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1, landonorris and 842,824 others
tagged: yourusername
georgerussell63: i wanna hold your hand while we're growing up 🩵
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user32: now THIS called me single in every single language
user33: him referencing best years>>>
user34: he better be giving her all her best years 🔪
landonorris: oh no he's gone soft
yourusername: what's wrong with soft?
landonorris: nothing! absolutely nothing!
yourusername: that's what i thought
user35: ugh she looks so genuinely happy
maxverstappen1: congrats
alex_albon: still have no idea how you got her to date you
georgerussell63: just the charm i guess
alex_albon: yeah the charm of yelling yabbah dabbah doo after a win...
yourusername: i'll give you the best years 🩵
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blackynsupremacy · 22 days ago
Text
UNDER WRAPS
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pairing: nicholas a. chavez x black!fem!reader
summary: you try to be the most loving and supportive girlfriend to nicholas and his career, but can your relationship stand a chance when his pr forces him to be in a relationship with another girl?
contains: based off this request, fluff, kissing, angst with happy ending, sadness, crying, jealousy, arguing, insecurity, anxiety, swearing, established relationship between reader and nicholas, reader is tabyana ali’s cousin and bff, mentions of fake dating with victoria abbott
a/n: if you want to be added to my taglist, please dm me so i can easily find it! i don’t want to leave anyone out!
taglist: @greengoblinswifey @thabiddie23 @hopefully-saturn @jkr820 @hoffmansgirl @austeenbootler @niteskysx @sabrinasopposite @thabiddie23 @hnch33rios @xoxoglittergossip @supaprettyg @motherismotheringggg @oscarisaackissmykitty @simply-lovley44 @elitesanjisimp @gxuxhdjdu @venic-bxtch @stargirl-mayaa
a pang of hurt increased the prominent heaviness in your heart as your thumb held down on the screen of your phone. on each of their instagram stories, you saw your boyfriend of one year, nicholas chavez, and his “girlfriend”, victoria abbott, walking hand in hand at another red carpet event. that’s right. your boyfriend has another girlfriend, but it’s not one would think to be normal. you still question to yourself—where did it all go wrong? after he got his big break from projects such as monsters and grotesquerie, nicholas had been in the spotlight everywhere by booking roles, interviews, photoshoots, and attending prestigious events for actors such as himself. this was all thanks to his immense talent and strikingly good looks, but also to his manager who’d made sure that nicholas’ name will be a name to remember in hollywood.
you couldn’t be more proud of the love of your life. you and nicholas had a great relationship. you both met through your favorite cousin who was basically your best friend, tabyana, who was his co-star on general hospital. you don’t watch the soap opera, but to support her, you went to one of those fan meet events for the show. you found nicholas to be very handsome and charismatic, but you really liked his passion for acting and his humbleness. he was exactly your type, but you didn’t think much of it. he was a whole celebrity and his chemistry with your cousin was off the charts, so you thought the chance of him ever getting with you would be little to none. the event was wrapping up, so you went to find your cousin and bid her a goodnight because you had work the next day. you gave her hug and she grabbed onto your wrist before you could take another step.
“taby—girl, where are you taking me?” you frantically question as she drags you to a table. it wasn’t just any table though. as soon as tabyana stopped, you look over to see none other than her fine ass co-star, nicholas alexander chavez. it was like love at first sight when the warmth of his deep brown eyes met with yours. as you both examine each other’s features, the temperature of your faces rise and the tempo of your heartbeats increase. you just stare at the man in awe as your cousin introduces you to each other,
“hey, nicholas! this is the one i was telling you about. this is my cousin and bff, y/n l/n.” she amicably says, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to sort of push you in closer. “y/n, this is my co-star, nicholas chavez.” a smile is instantly visible on his face as nicholas stands to meet you where you stand. you try not to swoon as his cologne intoxicates your senses, but you manage to keep it cool. you take his large awaiting hand into yours for a cordial shake.
“it’s a pleasure to finally meet you, y/n. you’re even prettier in person.”
his heart flutters when you thank him and flash a pearly smile at the compliment. then it dawned you that he said in person.
“thank you, nicholas! i’m curious, what do you mean by in person?” you had to ask just be safe, hoping that he wasn’t a creep, but the next thing he said almost sent you to heaven. nicholas chuckles in bashfulness, a hand in his pocket and the other running through his brown hair. tabyana gave him a knowing look with a smirk,
“do you want me to tell her or…?” she playfully trails off, waving her hand for nicholas to speak up. he clears his throat to meet your gaze,
“i’ll say it, i just don’t want to make a bad first impression— okay, so, taby and i were on set taking a break and she was on her phone scrolling until she just squealed out of nowhere—”
“i did not squeal. i just got hyped up.” tabyana chided, cutting him off. with a playful eye roll, you settle your cousin, so that you could hear nicholas out.
“anyways! she scared me and i asked what’s the matter. she gave me her phone and it happened to be your instagram and you just posted pictures from your vacation when you were on the beach. he paused to clear his throat before he proceeded to speak, “and uh, you looked absolutely stunning, so—i asked about you and that’s how i found out that you were taby’s cousin. she also told me that you were gonna come tonight, so that we could officially meet.” he finished, giving you a nervous, but adorable lopsided smile.
tabyana smiled in satisfaction as her plan to get you two together was working, now she had to get you alone.
“hey, i gotta make my rounds and chat with some fans, nicholas keep y/n company. i love you, cuz! byeeeee!” before you could even protest, she was already scurrying to another area in the venue, leaving you and nicholas alone at the table. not long after, he offered to buy you a beverage and stay a while longer to talk. you wanted to politely decline because you had to go home, but with the new knowledge you just received from him, it was only fair to give him a proper shot. as the time passed by, you two shared joy, laughter, and eventually, a budding romance. the romance was blissful, but still a bit private. you both wanted to make sure that this relationship was going to last before running it to social media, so you and nicholas kept it cute, sweet, and lowkey for the next few months. it was like you were in your own peaceful bubble of love and happiness, but it abruptly popped a week after celebrating your one year anniversary.
“make this make sense, nicholas! what the hell do you mean that you’re getting into another relationship? are you seriously breaking up with me right now?” you stood up from the sofa in the living room of your now shared apartment.
“babe, look. i don’t want to do this either and i’m not breaking up with you, i would never— this is just something that these agents do to ensure that i get more projects. the more i do, the better at acting i get and i could support us both. acting is my life’s dream, but what’s the use of that when you have no one to share it with? i only want you.”
nicholas had just broken the news to you that he had to be in a public relationship with another actress named victoria, which was instructed by his pr team. he stands up to gently take your hand before guiding you into a warm embrace. your head pressed against his chest to hear his steady heartbeat as you pondered. this was all so crazy. you knew that dating a celebrity had its perks and flaws, but why couldn’t you be known to the world as his girl? was it because you’re not an actress or a celebrity in general? was it because of your background? would nicholas fall out of love and leave you for her? so many questions ran a race in your brain as you felt a lump in your throat, your vision blurred by the moisture building up in your pupils which didn’t take long to rain on your face and his t-shirt. at the first whimper, nicholas gingerly pulled away from the hug and guided your chin with his fingers as you struggle to meet his sympathetic gaze. you hated crying in front of him sometimes.
“baby—baby, look at me.” he whispered, never taking his eyes from your blushed, teary face. you sniffled, the soothing pads of his thumbs to wipe the falling tears from your melanated skin calms you enough to listen to him. nicholas presses a gentle kiss to your forehead before he speaks,
“i need you to understand that i’m not just doing this to get my name out there, i’m doing this for us. i know we’ve only been together for a year, but i want to build our future together and i don’t want it to crumble before i start, okay?” nicholas gulps, holding both sides of your jaw not daring to break eye contact,
“do you love me, y/n?” he questions, you don’t hesitate to answer,
“i love you, nicholas. i love you with everything that i am. it’s just—” you pause to sigh before communicating, “i want to be able to show everyone that i’m seriously in love with you. we’ve already kept this private long enough and now you gotta be public with someone else? i don’t know how we’re gonna do this.” you confess, your eyes watering again. you know there’s going to be pictures everywhere of them on different sites and platforms. hell, maybe you might even hear it during lunch break gossip at work. you felt your entire abdomen painfully cave in at the thought, but it dissolves to that familiar warm, tingly sensation when you feel nicholas’ lips press to yours in gentle earnestness, you instinctively return the kiss and he pulls away to press his forehead to yours.
“i love you more, but do you trust me to do this? it’s only temporary.”
trust. you ponder on the short word with such an immense meaning that determines the foundation for any type of relationship. you thought back to all of the times you’ve shared with nicholas, he’s never given you any reason to doubt his loyalty towards you before, but this opportunity for him could change that and that made you worried. for your relationship and your peace of mind, you silently nodded in response.
“use your words, baby, i need you to say it.” he softly urges, intertwining your fingers with his. you peer into his eyes, it was like he wouldn’t make a move without your verbal approval, so he was serious about this after all.
“i—i trust you, nicholas.” you confirm, squeezing onto his palm as if he’ll fly away from you right this second. it was now your turn to initiate a kiss, just to reassure that even though both of you weren’t fond of this situation, you were still going to make this work.
TWO WEEKS LATER
once nicholas went public with his new “relationship” at first you were a bit supportive, but now you were starting to sulk in loneliness. with each passing day, you were starting to feel like nicholas was slipping away from you. during the day, he’d be with victoria out on the street, the beach, on set, anywhere where the faux couple’s pictures could be captured for all of the world to view. in the night, he’d come home eager to see you, wrap you in a warm embrace, and comedically dish out any details concerning all of his “dates” he went on over dinner and a movie. he admitted that some of the places they went to would be great enough for you both to check out. you smiled and pretended to agree, but the idea of taking your real girlfriend on some of the same dates as your fake one felt off to you. social media was starting to become a train wreck for you. no matter how far down you scrolled, they still managed to show up on your feed. it hurt like hell to see a video of them dancing in a nightclub, victoria lovingly gazed up at his figure as if he hung the moon. it was obvious that she developed feelings. nicholas didn’t look too interested, he just tried to be polite with a cordial smile on his face for the camera as they swayed to the beat of the music. the comments rooting for this lie of an alliance wasn’t helping either, so you just deleted all socials except for tumblr and pinterest until it all died down.
that should be you. he’s your boyfriend—if that’s even the truth anymore. you desired to tell the world about the love you had for nicholas, but this could ruin his reputation, his life’s work. this was all too much. damn his agent, damn his pr, and damn this whole thing! you weren’t sure if you could pretend that this was okay for any longer. before you made any drastic decisions out of bitterness, you had to communicate it with nicholas first. all week you’ve been trying to get nicholas alone to speak your heart, but due to his schedule, he was out later than usual which had you fed up at this point. although you were fuming, you patiently waited for him to get home. it was half past midnight when he tiredly walked through the door and jolted a bit when he saw your burning gaze.
“hey, babe! i’m so sorry. the after party ran over so late and i—” he tried to explain, but you cut him off. you wish you weren’t so angry because it sounded like he wanted to be here.
“nicholas, we need to talk.” at your words, he didn’t hesitate to stride from the door to where you sitting. he bent down on one knee to meet your eye level.
“anything, sweetheart. what’s on your mind?” he inquires, taking your hands within his to reassure that was listening. the bitterness within you wants to take them away because these are the same hands that were holding hers. thankfully, your love for him conquered all of that. you sigh out, your eyes shooting to the ceiling as they blur in tears.
“i think we need to take a break—until this whole fake relationship thing is completely over. nicholas, i love you, but i feel like that you’re not even mine. i love what we have, but keeping it a secret while you’re presented as someone else’s perfect lover is tearing me apart.” you confess, your teardrops drizzle on your connected hands as your heart continues to break. he hastily shakes his head, his brown gaze painted with worry.
“no, no—babe, y’know that i’m yours. always. remember what i said i’m doing this for us. don’t you trust me?” he asked.
“i do, nicholas, and i support you and your dreams, but do i really need to suffer for it? how would you feel if i were out some other guy? yeah, i don’t love him, but someone always ends up getting hurt or left out , so there’s gotta be a decision made. heh, i bet you don’t even know that victoria has feelings for you—i’ve seen the way she looks at you in those pictures.”
nicholas is speechless, gazing into your eyes. he gulps before mustering up the correct words,
“so—so what’re you saying? are you leaving me, y/n?”
“not completely, nick. i just—need some space away from all of this. i don’t want you to choose between your career or me, you’re probably under contract and i don’t want to ruin things for you.”
“y/n, please don’t—just give me a chance, maybe i can talk to my team to shut this goddamn thing down. i don’t ever want to lose you. i—” with each word his voice starts to crack and tears form in his eyes at the thought of losing you. it shouldn’t have to be this way. you shouldn’t have to suffer due to the tricky business of hollywood, nicholas realized that roles come and go, but having a love like yours was rare to come by.
“nicholas, i understand, but i think it’s best if don’t see each other right now, so i’m going to be staying somewhere else for a little bit. once this is all over, we can pick up from where we left off.” you confirm, getting up from your seat and walking into your shared bedroom with nicholas not traveling far behind you. he leans against the doorway and observes as you gather a small suitcase that’s already packed with essentials. before you could even walk out of the door, his large frame is blocking your way.
“nicholas—move.” you command while gripping on the handle of your luggage. your eyes begging him to not make this harder than it is for you.
“y/n, don’t do this, please. let’s just sleep it off and i’ll get it straightened out first thing in the morning. besides, where would you go?” he questioned, not moving from his spot.
“i’m not telling you that! look, i want my space, nicholas. at least let me have that until this is over. i can’t stand it anymore. we can’t keep pretending like everything’s fine when it’s not.” you rebutted, you moved around the room to located your phone, so that you could text tabyana that you needed to crash at her place for a few days and that you would explain later. that’s when you saw him take out his own phone and dial a number. you watched in confusion when he put it on speaker,
“hey.” he firmly greeted on the phone with a hardened gaze and tightened lips. you heard the voice on the other end respond with such an enthusiastic tone,
“aye, nick! how’s it goin’? i just wanna say that the people love you and victoria. i can see the headlines now!” it was his manager on the phone and his words only made want to shrink into nonexistence. this wasn’t how it was supposed to be. he glanced at you, your eyes filled with hurt and frustration, and it ignited a fire within him. this had to stop.
“actually, um—can you hold on a second?” he requested, his voice steady despite all of this drama. nicholas took a deep breath, before he went straight to the point.
“this—with victoria and i, it can’t go on. it’s over. period.”
with a baffled look, your tight grip on your suitcase started to loosen as you stepped in closer to see if this was really happening. there was a pause of silence that grew thick in the air with an awkward tension.
“you there?” nicholas question with an arched brow.
“yeah, i’m here,” his manager replied, slightly puzzled, “but kid, you gotta realize this is just business—acting. you’re basically putting on a show and the world loves to watch it.”
with the shake of his head, nicholas took another deep breath, his heart racing.
“not if it means hurting those who don’t deserve it. look, i can’t keep pretending to be with victoria when my heart belongs to someone else—and what if victoria catches feelings, huh? do you think that’s fair to her? you’re basically stringing her along and that’s messed up.” he glanced back at you, your expression softening as you realized he was fighting for you, for you both. “i want—no, i need to tell the world about my real relationship. we’ve kept things private long enough and i want to be with her openly.”
there was another moment of silence on the other end, and nicholas could almost hear his manager’s fingers pinch the bridge of his nose and a sigh of exasperation in the office. “nicholas, you know how this works. what about the fans—”
“the fans deserve the truth,” nicholas firmly interrupted. “a stable relationship is built on the truth and i’m not losing mine because you want me to live a lie for some views—so, call whoever the hell you need to while i’ll break the news to victoria because this is all over. do we understand?” he concluded, not taking his eyes away from you. you felt your heart swell as you watched him stand his ground, the weight of the world seemingly lifting from both of your shoulders. his manager sighed in defeat before responding and nicholas smirked because he knew he got his way.
“alright, alright. let me see what i can do, but you know this could shake things up, right?”
“that’s cool.” nicholas said, shrugging his shoulders, but with determination in his voice. “consider me ready.”
you heard his manager let out a chuckle,
“you got balls, kid. that girl of yours sure is lucky.”
nicholas warmly gazed at you, a simper growing on his lips.
“you’re damn right, but i’m luckier.” with that, he hung up the phone and strided to you to place his hands on your shoulders. his expression a mix of hope and vulnerability.
“baby, i am so sorry for everything. i was so selfish and blind that i couldn’t see how much i’ve hurt you. i thank you for believing and trusting in me, but it shouldn’t have to cost you your happiness—ever. i love you too much for that to happen again and trust me, it won’t happen again. i don’t care about headlines, i care about you. i care about us.”
tears brimmed in your eyes, but this time they were tears of sweet relief instead of painful sorrow.
“are you being for real, nicholas?”
“i’m dead serious. y’know how you say that you don’t play about me? well— i don’t play about you either.” he sincerely said, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you closer proximity. “i love you, and the whole world deserves to know. i don’t give a damn about who supports it or not.”
you finally show a genuine smile through the sadness, and you nodded, your heart racing at every word. this felt like a dream, but this was reality, your reality. “i love you too, nicholas. god, i was so tired of feeling like a secret.” his burly arms enclose tighter around you, your own reaching to clasp together around his neck.
“no more secrets. from now on, it’s just you and me. no one else. unless—the future is good to us and we start a family.” even though there was a glint of mischief within his eyes, you could tell that he was dead serious.
“you big softie, c’mere.” you playfully roll your eyes and stand a bit taller to press your full lips against his. as you kiss, the tension of the past few weeks instantly melt away as you both step into a new era of your relationship, ready to take on any challenges as soon as the world finds out about your no longer secret love.
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mytokyodebunker · 8 months ago
Text
Asking The Ghouls To Do Your Hair
Frostheim
Jin Kamurai
Jin… Doesn't know. Probably hands it off to Tohma- I'm just joking…UNLESS-. He's actually pretty caring of others so he might learn one or two different braids but that's it. He seems like he's probably good at putting your hair in a clip or a bun but nothing else.
Tohma Ishibashi
Tohma…..He would be good at it probably. If not, then surprise!!! He is now. He's used to taking care of Jin anyways, adding hairstyles or braiding to that list wouldn't be that bad.
Kaito Fuji
Kaito would absolutely love to do it but he would probably be bad at it. He's SCREAMING at the fact that he's touching your hair with your permission, extremely happy the entire time. Might be confused during the process but he's not complaining at all.
Lucas 'Luca' Errant
He doesn’t know but won't give up until he knows every hairstyle humanly possible. Every time he asks you with earnest eyes to let him practice again, and every hairstyle is more elaborate than the last. The process is always long and painful on your scalp, but the end result never disappoints!
Vagastrom
Alan Mido
Our young grandpa himbo. We all know he wouldn't know how and he would rather not accidentally hurt you in any way, even if you flinch at the slightest tug, he'll stop immediately.
Leo Kurosagi
Leo knows different hair styles, but doesn't know how to execute it. He knows what's trending and what looks good on a person. Little bastard wouldn't give the advice until you mess up though.
Shohei 'Sho' Haizono
He wouldn't know until he get comfortable with your hair and he'll pick up on it after awhile. The type to learn quickly. Alternatively, he does Leo's hair when Leo makes him do it, and he always does a good job. Very gentle.
He also strikes me as Leo's unwilling makeup artist and lighting/photoshoot assistant so you know that he has some sort of experience.
Jabberwock
Haru Sagara
He's the best person to ask if you want someone to brush your hair nicely (and quickly), since he's the one who grooms all the animals at Jabberwock. Can't do much else to your hair - maybe add a bow? Would still somehow injure himself in the process though.
Towa Otonashi
Surprisingly good at hair. Would probably also put flowers in it too while he's doing it. Sunny sunny day the entire time....may or may not eat the flowers while it's in your hair. He knows One (1) style and proceeds to make everyone he can get his hands on look like a fairy princess. There's no choice.
Ren Shiranami
Doesn't know. Doesn't WANT to know. Frankly, he is offended you asked him. He hasn't touched a comb in ages, his hair is short enough and it'll get messed up again anyway.
If anything, you would be combing his hair. But be warned, he will loudly complain whenever you get the comb caught on a tangle.
Sinostra
Taiga Hoshibami
Taiga….Nope. He will pull and tug on your hair. Forget anything about braiding or any hair styles, he'll fuck up your hair worse than you ever could. Taiga would rip your hair out or else cut the tangles out with scissors if you ever asked.
Romeo Lucci
He had strong opinions about your hair (and the rest of your look) from the start, so if you let him he'll give you a full makeover.
he'll know what your face shape needs and wash & style your hair nicely, then complain that your skin is crap and give you a facial and apply your makeup, then put you in a better outfit so that your shitty clothes don't ruin his hard work. Then make you work the casino floor because his services don't come for free and no he won't pay you. Do you have any idea how much the perfume you're wearing costs?
Ritsu Shinjo
Doesn't know. Could learn. Will he though? Probably not, it's nothing he needs to be a lawyer. If you insist, then he proceeds to over-gel your hair while you die inside. Later, he'll genuinely ask why you haven't asked him a second time.
Hotarubi
Subaru Kagami
Subaru would say he doesn’t know anything about hair but if you insist then maybe he'll just brush it out for you, but secretly he probably knows all of the theatre hairstyles for kabuki. He prefers leaving your hair loose though.
Haku Kusanagi
He can, and is ridiculously smooth at it too. No head pain, can tell if you've got a sensitive scalp, knows all of the staple styles - ponytail, bun, braid. It's strangely therapeutic to get your hair done by him, like spending time with a big sibling.
Zenji Kotodama
Zenji would make some rendition of maiko and geisha hairstyles but with his own spin on it, but it will take hours and your scalp will be screaming at you and he won't shut up all through the process. He would spout off poetry while at it. Might sing too. If you don't like his voice, too bad he's doing it every time he does your hair if he gets the chance.
Mortkranken
Yuri Isami
He insists that he, a genius doctor, is adept at everything that requires dexterity, but he refuses to spend his incredibly precious time braiding your hair. Suggest he's not actually that good, and he'll change tune. He'll sit you down and plait your hair with perfect surgical precision (ha), then demand endless praise and fawning.
Jiro Kirisaki
Doesn’t know. Probably hasn't used a comb before. He could learn, but that's so much effort. Thinks it'd be easier for both of you if you just cut it all off.
Obscuary
Rui Mizuki
Rui won't touch your hair, because he's worried about his curse, but he'd notice right away when you change your hair. He'll happily compliment it, and might suggest hairstyles he'd love to see you wear in the future.
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thepixelelf · 10 months ago
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warnings: coarse language. wc: 793
[the amnesia card always declines]
If there's one thing Joshua Hong has above all else, it's the audacity.
If there's two things, it's the audacity and the most grabbable, stupidly defined, makes-you-wanna-bite-into-them man tits you've ever seen in your godforsaken, miserable life.
Well, okay, maybe that counts as three things. Whatever.
"Oh my fucking god," you hiss, ducking closer to the coffee shop/bakery's table and hiding your entire head with both arms. "What is he doing here?!"
Soonyoung, the least subtle person you know (but you've given up on fixing him at this point) turns 180 degrees in his chair to watch the loser posing for a "totally casual" photoshoot outside. He hums in understanding, putting his hand under his chin like an experienced detective. "He must've seen your instagram story."
"He doesn't even follow me..."
"Oh, he's following you, alright." Soonyoung turns back around and stabs his fork into his strawberries 'n' cream croffle.
You glare at him over the pastries on the table. "Very funny."
"I know I am," he says with a dumb smile that says your sarcasm was not effective! "When are you going to stop holding your stupid grudge?"
An offended scoff escapes you. "It is a completely reasonable grudge, for your information."
"What, you being mad at him for...kissing you at that party?"
"For smooshing that stupid pretty face on mine at that party then acting like it never happened!" You slap your hands on the table, but as soon as you spot Joshua outside start to turn his head, you duck back into hiding.
Soonyoung points his fork at you. "He was drunk."
"So was I," you argue with a sneer. "But I remember everything-- especially you being the reason we had to cut the night short because you started drunk-crying and I had to take you home."
Suddenly capable of shame, Soonyoung scoots forward in his chair and leans over the table. "Have I mentioned that I love you and you're the best friend in the world?"
"Whatever, buddy." You roll your eyes. "Just remember all the shit I've done for you when I'm the one crying in the club."
"Crying in the club?" echoes Joshua--
Joshua?!
Your soul escapes your body entirely and jolts back in a nano-second. "Holy fuck--" You put a hand over your racing heart and send a death glare to the smug offender. "You scared the shit out of me!"
Joshua just smiles that stupidly pretty smile and, damn it, you're supposed to be ignoring this jackass.
"Sorry," he says, but he doesn't sound sorry at all. "Are you free?"
Making a face, you look over at Soonyoung, who just shrugs, then back at Joshua. "...Right now?"
"Right now is good." He nods in thought. "Or later today. Or tomorrow. If not, then the day after that. You've been avoiding me."
You force your shoulders to relax and avert your eyes. "No I haven't."
Joshua's expression suddenly goes solemn, which you notice because, shit, you started looking at him again. "Did I do something?"
At that, you scoff, crossing your arms and shaking your head in disbelief.
"Seriously. That party... I don't remember much, except that I've barely seen you since."
"Don't play the amnesia card on me, Josh. It's so tired."
His brows furrow, and your stupid fingers want to massage the hurt look right off his forehead. As if the dumbass deserves it.
"It's not amnesia," Joshua says. "But it's fuzzy. I can't tell what really happened that night or what was just my dream."
"Really? We're talking dreams now?"
He shrugs, crossing his arms, which fold just underneath those stupid, huge pecs... "I happen to dream about you a lot."
"Mmhm... Sure..." Are they bigger than the croffles? The melon buns? The... "Wait-- what?"
Joshua smiles, and you just know he caught you staring, the little shit. "I said, I dream about you a lot. Kiss scenes included."
Your jaw drops, maybe to the floor, but you can't be bothered to check. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Soonyoung make a perfect circle with his mouth before he hurriedly asks the barista if they serve popcorn.
"Joshua Hong, you..." Standing from your chair, you fist the collar of his fleece sweater in both hands, primed to throttle. "...are so fucking stupid."
Then somehow, even though you're the one who pulls him in, he's the one who takes your breath away.
When your lips part, though, you open your eyes while his stay closed, and he leans in again.
"Wait," you say, halting him with the one word. "How did you find me here?"
Wincing, Joshua peeks just one eye open. "Please don't be mad at him."
You whip around, but the bell over the shop's door is already tinging, and Soonyoung is dashing across the street like his life depends on it.
Good, because it does.
"Kwon Soonyoung! You are so fucking dead!"
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daenysx · 2 months ago
Note
Okay blurb req for old money!Aemond who is ALSO a model for really expensive brands and his gf is a photographer👀 inspired by the photoshoot and that one specific blue leopard print pic🙂‍↕️🤭
oh my god i hope i did well, thank you, rue !! <33333
modern!aemond targaryen x fem!reader
cw; modern!aemond being a hopeless romantic, suggestive, kisses, no but he's really so in love it hurts, photographer!reader and model!aemond can be a new favorite wow
"are you sure this is professional?"
aemond has no shame, honestly. you don't think you can be expected to be 'professional' when your boyfriend looks like he'll ruin your entire existence by looking like the most charming being in the entire universe.
his blue eyes sparkle in the latest photos you take, a stark contrast with his platinum blonde hair. flowy strands make you want to pull aemond to yourself enough to give him a good kiss on his neck as your fingers travel in his hair. maybe you can do that when you get to be alone with him. oh, you'll definitely do that when you're alone.
"i believe i'm extremely professional." you murmur, holding his hand to make him pose the way you want. "if you stop being so distracting, it'll be even better."
he smirks. a small quirk of lovely lips, he's handsome and he knows it. he leans into your space and your hold on your camera tightens. you will not kiss him. you can't, there are other people here, and this is business. you take a step back.
"i'm only doing what you tell me to do." he says like he's the most innocent man. "you can't say i'm not being good."
you give him a small smile. he's in the mood for playing.
"i didn't say that." you say, quietly. "come on, a few more for me and we'll be done."
aemond fixes his posture, your one hand still holding his. "of course." he says, coolly. "you know i can actually be good for you. as many as you want, you'll have it."
you lick your lips to control your face expressions. not the time, not the place. just like you say to him, only a few more and you'll be done.
the clothes he's wearing make aemond look taller as if it's actually possible. you admire his poses, his confidence and his awareness of how good he looks. he turns his head for another picture, his eyes following your every move. it's like a wordless conversation between you two.
"can i get one with a smile?" you ask him, your hand directing his last pose. "not too wide, just- a subtle one, please."
"i'm afraid that's not possible if i'm going to give you a smile." he flirts. "maybe you should let someone else take the photo if you need a subtle one."
you hear two girls giggling at the corner. he really thinks he's so fun, doesn't he? it's his world here, he knows how to charm his way and he certainly knows how to be a flirt. you're thankful he's already yours, it would be impossible to handle him otherwise.
after another fifteen minutes, you're all done. you go next to aemond, leaving your camera. people around you move quickly to clean up the place, and fix all the mess that has been made. aemond takes your hand to brush a kiss on your knuckles. his eyes are warm this time, so clear under this lights.
"what do you think?" he asks. "good?"
you nod softly. "probably the best in a long time."
"kind of hard not to." he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you closer. "i had the best photographer."
you give him a kiss on his cheek but that's all. he's been teasing you all day long. "do you flirt with all your photographers like this, mr. targaryen?"
"absolutely not." he answers, cheekily. "my flirting skills are reserved for only one person."
"i think you owe me a drink." you tell him. "even working is easier than trying to deal with your incessant teasing."
"we'll have dinner first." he says, kissing the side of your head. he doesn't say, but he's tired. "think of what you want to eat when i'm changing, okay? i have a few options if you can't decide."
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pnutbutter-n-j-elyy · 6 months ago
Text
Never Say Never| Pt1
Warnings: Cursing
Pt2 Pt3 Pt4
(xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
You and Hyunjin had always been a passionate couple, with emotions running high in both good and bad times. It was something that you had yearned for- being in a relationship as passionate as a gasoline fueled flame; but in time you had realized what you had was both a blessing and a curse.
The day had started out like any other, but a simmering tension had been building up for weeks, ready to boil over.
Simple things had been irritating you both, yet you were too afraid to communicate those things in fear of causing issues.
You had just returned home from running some errands when you noticed the look on Hyunjin's face as he stared intently at something on the screen of his phone.
"Hey, I'm back," you called out, placing your bag on the kitchen counter. You had left the dorms earlier to run out and pick up a few things you intended to use to cook the guys dinner, running to a few other places as well throughout the late morning until early evening.
Hyunjin didn't respond right away, his side turned to you as he scrolled through his phone. You sensed something was off but decided to ignore it for now, too anxious of a person to start confrontations.
"How was your day?" you asked, trying to keep the mood light.
He turned around, a frown creasing his forehead. "Did you see this?" he asked, showing you an article from Dispatch.
You glanced at the screen and sighed. "Yeah, I saw it. They're always making up rumors and releasing things. You know that." The headline read:
STRAY KIDS HYUNJIN DATING FOREIGN NON-IDOL?
Hyunjin's frustration was palpable. "It's not just rumors this time, Y/N. They have photos of us together, and they're saying you're a distraction to my career." He rushed a hand through his hair. "And this isn't the first time its happened. Remember when you took my Instagram pictures but forget to edit your reflection out of the mirror? Thankfully it was just your shoulder, but you've put us in multiple situations because of stupid mistakes you make. Like the photo in the article-" He shows his phone to you. "Everyone knew I was doing an isolated photoshoot. None of the other members were there and I said you could come but to be careful when leaving so you aren't seen at the shooting scene. But rather you aren't careful and they have a picture of you in my varsity jacket."
You sigh in frustration. "Hyunjin, they don't even know what my face looks like! I always wear a hat and glasses and a mask and clothes that cover me up. I don't see the big deal in people speculating you being in a relationship! Just ignore it and it'll die down." You turn to go put some of the groceries away but Hyunjin spoke.
"I wasn't finished Y/N. You seem to think its that easy. I'm supposed to look desirable - attainable Y/N. I have to live the life of a bachelor even if it isn't the case."
You turn at the sound of his voice. You don't know if it was the flippant tone he used while saying something so dismissive or if it was because of how fed up you were of hiding but you scoffed.
You felt a mix of anger and hurt. "So, what? Am I not supposed to be around you because you need to feed into people's delusions? Are you expecting me to sit at home and pretend like we're nothing more than just two people who have mutual feelings but can't act on them because of fanservice? All because of a tabloid article?"
He ran a hand through his hair again, clearly agitated. "It's not that simple. My career is on the line here. The fans, the company—they all have expectations."
Your temper flared. "And what about my expectations, Hyunjin? Does that not matter?"
Hyunjin's eyes flashed with frustration. "Of course it matters, but we have to be realistic. You- this could ruin everything I've worked for."
You laughed humorlessly at Hyunjin's slip up. "So...me loving you is ruining your career?" You licked your lips and then puckered them in thought. "Makes sense. considering I was the one who said yes to your advances." Your voice has a biting sarcasm to it.
"Y/N don't start. You knew what you were getting into- I warned you about dating an idol."
You threw your hands up in exasperation. "This wouldn't even be an issue if you just disclosed our relationship! How many times have we had to sneak around and hide like we're doing something wrong? And you didn't warn me about this. Matter of fact you warned me about how people would act knowing you were in a relationship. They don't know shit Hyunjin, because you have yet to tell anyone other than the members about us. And they wouldn't have found out so quickly if it wasn't for Jisung being nosy and following you."
He scoffed. "Its common sense. You've lived here long enough to know not all relationships are disclosed right away. "
"You gave me the impression that you were going to inform people! It's been a year, Hyunjin! A fucking year."
"You know it's not that simple. Disclosing our relationship could have serious repercussions. I could lose everything I've worked for."
Your voice rose in frustration. "And what about me? Do you know how it feels to be kept a secret? To constantly worry about getting caught, about being labeled as a distraction or worse? Getting doxxed? At least if you told people they could be warned of legal reprecussions! Or maybe they would feel inclined to love someone their idol loves just out of decency. Not labeling us as a couple to the public is making things worse. Its making it hard for me-"
Hyunjin took a step closer, his frustration evident. "Do you think this is easy for me? I have to think about my career, my future. It's not just about us!" His voice was sharp and there was a hint of something underlying you weren't sure you had ever heard before.
You felt tears of anger and hurt welling up. "So, what? Am I just supposed to sit here and accept that I'll always come second to your career?"
He shook his head, his voice rising. "That's not what I'm saying. But you have to understand, this is my life. This is what I've worked so hard for. I can't just throw it all away."
"But you don't realize doing all of that is just slowly throwing me away?"
The argument escalated quickly, with both of you hurling accusations and past grievances at each other. Each word was a dagger, cutting deeper and deeper. And if emotions were blood you would have been dead by now.
"You never appreciate what I sacrifice for us," you shouted, tears streaming down your face. Your throat hurt from the past few minutes of the screaming match you and Hyunjin had been in. "I'm constantly worrying, constantly hiding! And for what?!"
Hyunjin's voice was equally loud, the frustration palpable. "And you think I don't make sacrifices?! Playing damage control all the fucking time! I'm getting tired!"
The room felt suffocating, the air thick with unspoken hurts and unresolved issues. The argument had spiraled out of control, touching every sore spot in your relationship.
"You know what, Hyunjin?" you said, your voice trembling with emotion. "Maybe we need some time apart."
His face fell, shock replacing the anger. "Are you serious?"
"Yes," you replied, feeling a strange mix of relief and heartbreak. "I can't do this anymore. I don't want to fight with you-"
Hyunjin's expression hardened. "I should have never asked you out in the first place. I guess I'm finally free from that mistake."
That sentence hung in the air, a cruel echo of his frustration and regret. The final blow to an already fragile situation.
You had intended for this to spark a moment of calm, so you could both take sometime to gather your thoughts and talk things out civilly rather than pierce each other.
You hadn't expected it go anything farther than that. Not a breakup.
You felt your heart shatter, and without another word, you turned and left the apartment. Tears streamed down your face as you walked away, leaving behind the life you had built together.
The immediate aftermath was a blur. You found yourself at your best friend's place, seeking solace and trying to make sense of what had just happened. The pain was overwhelming, and every memory of Hyunjin felt like a knife to your heart. Your friend welcomed you with open arms, offering a shoulder to cry on and a place to stay, since they doubted that you'd want to be where Hyunjin knew you'd be.
They made you a cup of tea and sat with you on the couch. "Do you want to talk about it?"
You shook your head, the words stuck in your throat. "Not right now."
Your best friend nodded understandingly. "Take your time. I'm here for you. Whether you want to cry or be angry. Punch things, break things. Whatever makes you feel better. But for right now I'm gonna take this." They gently took your phone from your hands, entering your password and blocking the sultry eyed boy; already sensing that this turn of events wasn't a kind one.
Meanwhile, Hyunjin was left alone in dorms, staring at the space where you had stood before. Regret and anger battled within him, and he found himself replaying the argument over and over in his mind. He sat on the couch, head in his hands, wondering how things had gone so wrong. The words he had said echoed in his mind, each repetition amplifying his regret. "I should have never asked you out."
He knew he didn't mean it, but the damage was done. The love of his life had walked out the door, and he was left to face the consequences of his words.
He sat there ruminating on it, feeling his anger slowly melt away and turn into immense guilt and then a deep sadness that spurred an onslaught of tears when he heard the members arrive and Jeongin's voice ring out asking what you had made them for dinner.
Days turned into weeks and the void you left in his life grew more apparent with each passing day. He missed your laugh, your presence, the way you made everything feel better. But he also knew that the words he had said couldn't be taken back.
You, too, were struggling. The pain of the breakup was a constant companion, and you found it hard to focus on anything else. Your friends tried to comfort you, but nothing seemed to fill the emptiness you felt inside.
One evening, as you sat in your best friend's living room, staring at the boxes of the last few belongings you had yet to unpack in your new shared home. You couldn't help but think back to all the good times you and Hyunjin had shared. The way he used to make you breakfast in bed when you'd spend the night at the dorms, the late-night talks,. when you were and the spontaneous adventures you took- specifically the ones that were far from the public gaze where you didn't have to worry about hiding. It all seemed so distant now, yet so vivid.
BSF/N noticed your pensive mood and sat down beside you. "You're thinking about him, aren't you?"
You nodded, tears welling up in your eyes. "I miss him. I don't want to but I do. Its been months shouldn't I be over him?"
"You need to move on love. There are plenty of people who can love you better than he ever did." Your best friend stated with the conviction only that of an angry bestie could hold. "He may have been good but you can find better than that coward." You nodded along, grateful for your friend's unwavering support, but still fostering that seed of pain.
Hyunjin was grappling with his own feelings of regret and longing. He often found himself staring at his phone, contemplating whether to call you or text you. Even if he knew you had more than likely blocked him. He didn't dare text, because he didn't want to see the tangible answer to his biggest worry.
So instead threw himself into his work, using his busy schedule to distract himself from the gnawing emptiness. Rehearsals, recording sessions, and performances became his refuge. Yet, every time he stepped off stage or left the studio, the loneliness crept back in causing an ineffable ache throughout his entire being.
His friends and groupmates noticed the change in him. He was more withdrawn, quieter, his usual spark dimmed.
"Hey, you okay?" Felix asked one evening as they wrapped up practice. "You've been pretty out of it lately."
Hyunjin forced a smile. "Yeah, just tired."
Felix didn't look convinced but nodded anyway. "If you ever want to talk, you know I'm here, right? You never...really told us what happened...we want to be here to support you, you know?"
"Thanks," Hyunjin muttered, his thoughts already drifting back to you.
Nights were the hardest for the both of you. Alone in the quiet darkness, memories of Hyunjin haunted you. You didn't have his voice to fall asleep to, neither did he have your soft snores. You would often wake up, reaching out for you, to see if he was still on the line. Only to find a dark screen, only occasionally lit up with the random spam notification you got throughout the night. The ache in your chest felt unbearable, and more than once, you found yourself sobbing into your pillow, wishing things had turned out differently.
Hyunjin wasn't faring any better. He would lie awake for hours, staring at the ceiling, replaying every argument, every mistake. The guilt and regret weighed heavily on him, making sleep elusive. He missed the sound of your voice, the feel of your hand in his, the comfort of your presence.
One night, unable to bear it any longer, Hyunjin found himself walking through the city streets, lost in thought. The bustling noise of the city was a stark contrast to the turmoil inside him. He found himself standing outside your favorite café, staring through the window at the place where you'd shared so many happy moments. The happiest one being the moment he had first saw you, smiling at the register happily as a new hire taking his order- only to see the cutest face of disgust he had ever seen at the mention of the word Americano.
It was a stupid way to fall, but wasn't love stupid?
The days dragged on, and the pain didn't lessen. It became a constant, dull ache that colored everything you did. Friends and family tried to pull you out of your shell, but nothing seemed to help. The weight of Hyunjin's words lingered, a reminder of how things had fallen apart.
One particularly rough day, you received a message from your workplace. Your performance had been slipping, and they were concerned. It was a harsh wake-up call, a reminder that life was still moving forward even if you felt stuck in place.
You tried to throw yourself into work, hoping it would distract you from the pain. But every little thing reminded you of Hyunjin. The music playing in the background, a passing comment from a colleague, even the smell of coffee—all of it brought memories of him rushing back.
Hyunjin, too, was struggling to keep up appearances. He would smile for the cameras, perform with his usual energy, but behind the scenes, he was a mess. His bandmates grew increasingly worried, their attempts to cheer him up falling flat.
The breaking point came one night after a particularly grueling performance. Hyunjin had given it his all on stage, but as soon as the lights went down, the emptiness hit him like a tidal wave. He retreated to his dressing room, shutting the door behind him.
He sank to the floor, head in his hands, and let the tears fall. The loneliness, the regret, the pain—it all came crashing down. He missed you more than words could express, but he didn't know how to make things right.
Your breaking point was the night you sat alone in your apartment - BSF/N on a business trip -staring at your phone. Watching the birthday live you would have never been allowed to watch if your roommate was home. The ache was too unbearable, and sparked your motivation to finally let go so you could be free from it.
Once you had hit 3 months without Hyunjin, the pain began to change. It didn't lessen, but it became a part of you, a background noise that you learned to live with. You went through the motions of daily life, but the joy and spark you once had were dulled. But as 3 months turned to 6 months which then turned to 9 months, it was almost a distant memory. And you were able to laugh again, the hollowness of your cheeks disappearing and becoming flushed with youth and your noticeable dimples once more.
Hyunjin's friends and bandmates continued to support him, but they could see the toll it was taking. He was a shadow of his former self, his passion dulled by the heartbreak. It was unnoticeable to the public - to them he seemed fine, they just minimized his dull eyes to exhaustion rather than depression. But to his best friends, it was as clear as day how hard he worked to push through every day.
"Hyunjin," Chan said one evening, pulling him aside. "You can't keep going like this. You need to start living again."
Hyunjin shook his head. "I can't move on...what if they come back- what if - what if they take me back?"
"You're never going to know unless you try talking to them," Chan urged. "You owe it to yourself, to both of you, to at least try. Seungmin has seen Y/N around. They've talked and he says it seems like Y/N is struggling as well. Even if you don't get back together, if you become friends again first..." Chan sighed. "Seungmin asked Y/N to unblock you. So I'd try reaching out."
But Hyunjin couldn't bring himself to reach out. The fear of making things worse, of hearing that you had moved on, was too much to bear. So, he continued to suffer in silence, the weight of his regret a constant burden.
For you, moving on felt impossible at first.
One evening an old friend was hosting a small get-together and wanted you to come. It was a chance to get out, to try and find some semblance of normalcy.
You had reluctantly agreed. The evening was a blur of faces and conversations, none of which seemed to penetrate the fog of your indifference until and old crush had sparked conversation with you...
Back in his apartment, Hyunjin stared at his phone, fingers hovering over your contact. He wanted to reach out, to apologize, to try and make things right. But the fear of rejection, of causing you more pain, held him back.
He set the phone down with a sigh, running a hand through his hair. The silence of the apartment was deafening, each minute feeling like an hour. He missed you more than words could express, but he didn't know how to bridge the gap that had formed between you.
But in a spur of confidence he sent you a message. Simply apologizing as asking if it would be okay to meet up as friends.
Because he needed you in his life in some manner. He knew he couldn't live without you. And he would be content with loving you quietly, unknowingly, putting on a mask of platonic affection if it meant you'd stay around.
Which seemed to be what he would have to do, after recieving your response.
He didn't know whether to cry tears or joy or pain.
Because while you had agreed to meet him again, to spark a new relationship with him - he immediately regretted ever harboring a hope of you loving him again.
Especially after seeing your profile in his feed for the first time in a long time, causing him to wish he hadn't reached out, wish you hadn't unblocked him- wish you weren't so kind and loving to agree to be his friend again.
Because no amount of time with you, no amount of your presence could ever be enough to even cover a fraction of the pain he felt seeing a new face in your feed.
A face that mimicked the exact face he had in your company.
Eyes that mirrored the exact sentiment and display of love he felt.
The face of one who knew the one they loved was the moon in a world full of stars.
And he knew from experience just how easy it would be for you to fall for someone who gave you that-
Considering he had been that person for you once...
(xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
@abovenyx @wolfs-archive @oddracha
@iyeeeverydee @parisanmorovati @seungmincenteric
@panbish-1209 @fxiry-vtt @sseawavee
@shuporanporang @amarecerasus @softkisshyunjin
@whoa-jo @meanergreener @rikibun
@ayyonoona @shinywombatcrusade @y4yayael
@skzstan12345 @mariteez @allys-reads
@jazziwritesthings @skzstannie @yongbokkiesworld
@kkkeopi @neverendingstay @moony-9
@minsungsthirdwheel @dreammix88
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glitterjay · 9 months ago
Note
needy jungwon after a tiring day of schedules...dance practice, variety shows, photoshoots. poor baby is just so tired yet so needy for reader :(
⭒ crying, humping / riding, clothed sex(?, praising, suggestive content under cut, mdni
⭒ c's note: your wish is my command | mlist!
⭒ taglist: @hollyoongs @moon7jay @wondipity @defnotfertilizedtoesw @kwiwin
enhypen's schedules have been very tight and busy as of lately. with the new comeback freshly released to the public, many variety shows and photoshoots have had to be done by the boys to promote their newest album.
jungwon seemed to be struggling the most out of the seven. according to jay, jungwon slept a lot less, staying late in the practice rooms to master the dances, having talks with the agency as their leader, and discussing what shows they would like to attend.
so, it was music to jungwon's ears when they were told they had reached the last week of promotions. instead of staying at the dorms, they were allowed to go home during that week, each of them individually. he took this as an opportunity to visit your apartment.
you were happy when you received a message from your boyfriend. you had been craving his love, his affection, and... his touch.
you prepared a homemade meal for him to enjoy when he arrived, lighting the scented candles that gave a fresh smell to your home. you had a white t-shirt of his that you stole before he left for his promotion. you knew you'd miss him, so why not keep something that smelled like him?
music was blasting throughout the apartment. you still had some time to get ready and look pretty for him, or so you thought. the sound of footsteps made you lower the music you had on, puzzled as jungwon had said he'd probably arrive at night.
there was a soft knock on the door, and you looked through the peephole. it was no other than yang jungwon himself. you opened the door with a smile on your face. "i missed you."
he smiled back and quickly pushed you back inside the apartment, clsing the door behind him. he stared at you up and down as if he'd suddenly forget how you look. "i was going to get ready," you defended yourself, "but you got here earlier than expected."
"i need you." he said. "i need you so bad."
your heart fluttered at his words, and there was an evident blush on your cheeks. you didn't know what to say. what could you say? you walked closer to him and closed the gap between the two of you. something jungwon would've done if you didn't move.
he grabbed you by the waist. his kisses were hard and fast, very messy. he walked both of your bodies to the couch, separating his face from yours to get some air and sit. he unbuckled his belt quickly. he was desperate. it took you by surprise when jungwon only undid his zipper, somehow taking his cock out through the entrance.
he hissed as the cold air of the room hit his sensitive shaft. he looked up at your dumbfounded figure with big glossy eyes, tiny sobs already leaving his pretty mouth. "so so bad."
you were glad he caught you before you got ready completely. you startled his lap, the length of his cock perfectly under your clothed cunt. the feeling of the fabric against his skin made jungwon throw his head back, right hand hanging right on top of his eyes, other hand resting on your hip.
you started humping his dick slowly at first, picking up your pace eventually. your boyfriend was a mess under you. his hips bucked up unconsciously, loud whimpers filling up your living room along his sobs. " 't hurts! hurts so bad!" he cried.
you removed the hand that was covering his face, grabbing his chin with your thumb and index finger, forcing him to look at you. his face was read, tear stains on his cheeks as new ones built in his eyes. "you're doing so good for me, baby."
he threw his head back again. he was so desperate to cum, and you knew exactly how to help him. you used the strength of your knees to get up just a little bit, your boyfriend's head shoting up at the sudden loss of contact. you rid up the huge shirt that was covering your body to reveal only your panties.
jungwon grianed at the sight, his mouth watering as his dick twitched. you aligned your entrance with his tip, and without a warning, you slammed yourself down on his cock.
"hagh! hmm!"
the sudden pleasure took him by surprise. the way you staid still for a little, clenching your walls around him before slamming your entire weight down on him, had him seeing stars. " 'm- 'm so close!"
jungwon managed to grab you by the hip before you slammed down on him again, bucking his hips up into the air. white ropes of cum shot out as he moaned loudly, head thrown back as his strong arms held you in place.
you sat next to him, brushing the hair that was sticking to his forehead out of the waym you kissed his temple and smiled. jungwon turned his head to look at you, panting loudly. "what a great welcome, love."
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missmonsters2 · 1 year ago
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Mirror, Mirror | Two
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Please do not copy, repost, or translate my work anywhere else.
PART ONE
Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader
Summary: Wanda oscillates between crying and being overcome with confidence to confess. She barely has time to reflect when the devastating news arrives that you have a date, and Wanda needs to formulate a plan—quickly.
Warnings: best friends to lovers. shenanigans. jealousy, jealousy. sexual tension. pining. yearning. sexual thoughts. spicy (tumblr's version). stupid steve. neurotic nat. brat & stinky. bug as in shutterbug.
*explicit version will only be available on Ao3 & will be posted there after series is completed*
Note: cue the shenanigans of date stalking and taylor swift. Put your hands together for the real MVP of this chapter: Yelena.
Reminder there's no taglist but you can follow my library blog for notifications 💘
Series Masterlist || Library Blog || AO3
Count: ~4.5k
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
This week's philosophical question is: Is it gay to think about your best friend?
The short answer is no. The long, complicated answer is that it might be. 
There's logic and reasoning behind this because don't most people think about their best friend? Don't most people plan to have their best friend in the future? If not, then why would they be best friends in the first place?
Sadly, there's a rude awakening in Wanda's wobbly defense. Natasha is the only person to blame for blowing down her defense made of straw when Wanda chats with her on the phone in the evening while you're out for a photoshoot. 
"How's Maria doing?" Wanda asks.
"Good," Natasha answers, and Wanda can hear the tap water running and realizes the redhead is doing the dishes. "She'll be coming to visit during Christmas."
"Oh, you must be very excited!" Wanda beams. If it were her, she'd be ecstatic to be seeing you after so long. 
"Yeah, it'll be good to see her. I think she's bringing her girlfriend, Sharon. They've been seeing each other for a few months, and she doesn't have anyone to spend Christmas with since her grand-aunt passed away.
"Oh," Wanda's voice is low, brows furrowing. "That seems very fast if she's coming to spend a holiday with Maria. How do you feel about it?"
Natasha hums. "Happy, I guess? I haven't met Sharon, but I've been hearing good things about her. She's able to keep up with Maria's busy life as she's got her own, but they make time for each other."
"But what if Sharon's wrong for Maria, or Maria ends up getting hurt."
"Then I'll break Sharon's legs, but Maria's a big girl. I'll be there for her, but she'll be okay," Natasha chuckles.
"But—"
"Wanda, what's with the questions about Maria?" Natasha cuts off. "Is it something with Bug? Are you worried about Raye? She's told me they haven't even gone on a first date yet; why are you so worried?"
"It's not about that!" Wanda said defensively. "I mean—I am worried, but I just don't want her getting hurt. She's my best friend; she deserves someone perfect. Don't you want someone perfect for Maria?"
Even as the words came out of Wanda's mouth, she grimaced because she was nowhere near perfect herself. 
"Of course I do," Natasha sighs. "But unless Maria is hurting, I'm not going to get overly involved with her love life. She'll go at her own pace and update me as she goes."
"But how will you know if Maria is going to continue living away? If she gets serious with Sharon, will Maria still plan to move back here? How will you guys plan on having a wedding at the same time and picking a house in the same neighborhood?" Wanda asks seriously. Her tone is distraught because it feels like Natasha doesn't care about her best friend at all! 
There's a moment of silence on the other line before Natasha says, "We don't plan for that. I mean, I'll be bummed for sure if Maria doesn't move back but we'll always be best friends. We'll visit each other and keep in contact as often as we need, but we don't need to physically be in the same place."
And another realization slides into place. 
"How are you guys best friends?!" Wanda yells into the phone before she hangs up without another word. 
Wanda knows that she'll have to call Natasha later and apologize and say she's on her period or something, but right now, with her eyes hot and wet, she digs her face into her pillow and cries instead.
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷ 
"Hey, I need to head out for another shoot today. Do you want me to pick up anything for you?"
Your voice muffles through Wanda's closed door. You've come in a few times, but Wanda had stayed in bed and pretended that she might've been under the weather. 
"No," Wanda says loud enough so you can hear it. "Have fun, though."
"I'll be home soon and make you some paprikash, but there's some chicken soup in the fridge for you if you want some while I'm gone," you reply. Wanda momentarily hears your hand land on the doorknob, but you don't turn it and come in. "Feel better, brat."
You don't wait for Wanda's response even though it is a quiet, "Thanks, stinky."
Alone in the apartment once more, Wanda sighs. She's been all over the place emotionally since she last talked to Natasha on the phone. She later sent a voice memo through text apologizing and said her period just came, which explained all the craziness. Luckily, Natasha was kind enough to leave it be, but they haven't chatted much since then—mostly on Wanda's end. 
Wanda's been caught between wanting to spend more time with you and distancing herself while sorting through her feelings. It was so easy at that moment to leave Vision and feel intense jealousy of Raye, but now in their own little bubble, everything was unraveling like a poorly wrapped present. 
The only saving grace was that you and Raye couldn't align your schedules to go on a date anytime soon. Raye was out of state currently and was supposed to be traveling for work for the next few weeks, and you were confirming projects that were supposed to be for the entire month. 
The extra time was sorely appreciated. 
In short, Wanda has cried 8 times in the last week while equally getting the inspiration almost to confess 7 times. 
There was a nagging fear, though. What if you didn't feel the same? What if Wanda was reading this one gigantic sign wrong, and you simply just liked brunettes with green eyes?
Or, what if you did feel the same and things didn't work out? What if the two of you date, and it goes wonderfully well before it ends? It doesn't matter what causes the end; just what if it did?
In either scenario, things would never be the same, and Wanda would lose her best friend of 10 years. 
Although, Wanda reasons that even if she confessed and you didn't feel the same, she wouldn't actually lose you. Sure, things would never be quite the same, but the friendship would continue. They've endured much worse, and Wanda would probably get over her feelings. 
Probably. 
Because if she didn't, well, Wanda wouldn't know what to do. She's lived too long of her life with you; she can't think of what it'd be like without you. Logically, she knew she'd survive, but there'd always be a part of her missing. 
Sometimes, Wanda thinks there was always a part of her missing until the day she met you. She can still remember 10 years ago like it was yesterday.
"Wanda, it'll be fine," Pietro's accent was thick and heavy, and Wanda refused to say anything out loud to acknowledge it. 
The girls in her class were already making fun of her accent, and her attempts to talk to them were rebuffed with looks as if they couldn't believe she dared to speak to them. 
It was too difficult, Wanda thought. It was too difficult to make friends when she transferred here mid-year, and everyone had already formed their cliques since elementary.
It was hard enough with the growing changes in her 14-year-old body, and she already felt awkward all the time—the giggling behind her back and to her face wasn't helping. 
Wanda wanted to go back home to Sokovia, except there was nothing left to return to. The war had reduced everything to shambles, and everyone else in her family was happy to have been able to seek refuge in America—Rochester, specifically. 
Wanda knew she should be grateful, especially since many of her aunts, uncles, cousins, and other extended family couldn't escape. She never really had too many friends, but the few she did went to Canada, and she knew she'd unlikely ever talk to them again. 
It was a lot of change, and Pietro was the only person who understood her at this new school, but even he couldn't do much since they shared no classes together. Plus, Pietro had still managed to make a friend, and Wanda didn't have the heart to make him sit with her at lunch every day. 
"Do you want me to eat lunch with you? I can ask Sam to sit with us," Pietro offered, but Wanda shook her head. 
"Are you sure?" Pietro asked again, preparing to sit with Wanda anyway, but Wanda shook her head.
"No, it's fine. I'm just going to eat my lunch quick and head to the library to catch up on some assignments," Wanda mumbled quietly, waiting for some girls in her class to pass by before she said it. 
"Okay," Pietro said, sighing since he was conflicted about staying with his sister or heading off to hang out with his friend. But at Wanda's insistence, he merely told her where she could find him if there was anything and took off with one last glance.
When Pietro was fully out of sight, Wanda took a seat alone at an empty table, pulling out her lunch reluctantly. She was quick to notice that the American kids typically brought a plain sandwich or bought food from the cafeteria, which usually consisted of the same foods like pizza or mac and cheese. 
While the comments about the food she brought were also embarrassing, Wanda didn't have it in her to ask her mother to make something else. Money was tight, and asking to add other things to the grocery list just so she could fit in didn't seem worth it when it wouldn't do anything about the fact no one wanted to talk to her. 
So, Wanda pulled out the finomfőzelék with her breaded chicken breast. She still didn't open it and let her containers sit on the table. 
Wanda wasn't quite sure what was causing it. Maybe it was just this specific instance of sitting alone, or maybe it was the last week and a half of enduring this, but Wanda felt her eyes burn and water. She willed it with everything she had inside to not let it fall and took a deep breath. 
"Hi."
The sudden sound made Wanda's head snap up, eyes wide with surprise. You stood there, and Wanda sort of recognized you from her classes. She thought she shared all but one with you. You've never contributed to the bullying but never stopped it or talked to her, either. 
Wanda vaguely recalled you've been sick with a cold the last few days. Her eyes shifted to look behind you, and she could see your friends looking very confused and beckoning you to come back to their lunch table.
"Hi," Wanda quietly greeted you back, wincing at how the accent could even come out with one syllable. 
You sat down suddenly, clearing your throat. "Can I ask you something?"
"Okay," Wanda replied warily. 
"Do you practice witchcraft?"
The question stumped Wanda.
"What?" 
"Do you practice witchcraft?" You repeated, looking serious. 
"No," Wanda frowned, so perplexed that she couldn't even be upset about her accent. "I don't. Why would you think that?"
"Well, Hela has been spreading rumors that you're a witch from Sokovia, and that's why Mr. Coulson passed away suddenly when you came."
Then, it's suddenly so clear why no one has been talking to her. 
"But if you're not a witch cursing people to death, then that's cool," you said, interrupting Wanda's thoughts. "I wanted to ask you that earlier but then I got sick for a few days. So, do you want to hang out with me?"
Wanda just stared at you, her heart racing because finally, finally, she was going to have a friend. "Yes," Wanda replied quickly, smiling. "That'd be...cool," she repeated your slang. 
"Cool," you smiled back before pointing at her food. "Noticed you bring different food every other day. Can I try some? I'll trade you some of my sandwich. Heads up, though, my mom has been experimenting with food. This week was Chinese food, so beef and broccoli might be between the bread."
Wanda smiled at the memory, the ends of it tapering off. You changed her life, and even when Hela made fun of you, you shut her up with a comment about how she stuffed her bra. It was devastating to a 14-year-old. 
After that, the two of you were inseparable. You still occasionally hung out with your group of friends, but you definitely drifted to spend time with Wanda. 
Wanda wonders if it was actually at that moment that she fell in love with you, but at 14, she didn't know how else to interpret it other than friendship. 
You and Wanda didn't meet Nat, Steve, Bucky, and all the others until high school when the other districts were poured into one school. Since then, so much has happened. 
Your parents divorced.
Wanda's mother passed away from cancer. 
You dated Sam very briefly, giving him your first kiss and then shortly breaking up with him after. 
You came out to her, scared, hesitant, and so happy when Wanda didn't care. 
Wanda started to date Vision.
Wanda wanted to go to NYU, and you happily went there with her. 
You confessed you had a crush on Natasha but didn't want to pursue it. 
Wanda's first break-up with Vision. 
You dated Jean Grey and cried when she left you for Scott. 
When you wanted to stay in New York City, Wanda decided to stay here too, rooting her career here with you. 
Wanda wonders if maybe actually she'd fallen in love with you several times over and over but didn't know how to interpret any of her strong feelings for you, categorizing them as friendship just as she did when she was 14.
"I'm home!" 
Wanda hears the apartment door close and the shuffling of you taking off your shoes. She looks at the time and realizes two hours have already passed. Deciding that she's wallowed enough, Wanda decides to get out of bed and leave her room, running her fingers through her hair to tame it.
When she enters the kitchen, Wanda finds you starting the process of making paprikash. It's something you've always done for her when she's sick, feeling down, or homesick. Yet, in this moment, something swells inside Wanda's chest, and she wants to burst out crying again.
"Oh, hey," you turn around and smile as you see her, and Wanda clears her throat and blinks the tears quickly away.
"Hey," Wanda smiles back as she makes her way towards you. "You didn't have to do that, you know. I'm feeling better."
You open your arms for her to dive into a tight hug. You smell like clean laundry and mint, and Wanda wants to bottle your smell. The tension in Wanda lately starts to drain from her body as you rub her back comfortingly. 
"Some paprikash never hurt nobody," you joke. "I'm glad you're feeling better, though, brat. Is it the break-up with Vis?"
"Huh?" Wanda's brows furrow. "No, not really. I haven't really thought about it."
"Homesickness?"
"Er," Wanda fiddles with the back of your shirt. "Kinda, I guess."
"Well, good thing Thanksgiving is in a few months. Your dad and brother are coming here this year, right?"
Wanda nods, brightening at the thought of seeing her family. "Yes, I hope papa and Tony don't get into it again this year."
"I think your dad gets a sick sense of joy of torturing the son of man responsible for all the weapons that destroyed Sokovia," you say dryly. "I think Tony's starting to catch on he's not serious, though."
Wanda chuckles, and you pat her shoulders before you pull away and take out a knife and chopping board. Watch sits on the bar stool, watching you cook, letting things fall into a comfortable silence. 
This was everything, Wanda thought.
Nothing could ruin this moment, and Wanda thought long and hard, building up the courage to say something about her feelings. She wasn't sure what to say, so she might start with something flirtatious, but Wanda would say it more sensually instead of the usual joking tone. 
"Oh!" You say without looking at Wanda, chopping the onion and garlic. "I forgot to tell you. Raye's flying back in a few days before heading out again, and we planned a date this weekend."
Everything is ruined, and Wanda can't tell if the onion or the devastating news is causing her eyes to water.
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷ 
"Why did you bring me here?" Yelena hisses.
"Because I can't bring Natasha!" Wanda hisses back. "And be quiet or else they're going to hear us!"
"Why not Natasha? She's your other closest friend," Yelena says, quieter as she grumbles. "You're making me miss movie night with Kate. We're supposed to watch Insidious and you're ruining my chances of making fun of her being scared."
"Because," Wanda exasperatedly says. "I've already had a meltdown with Natasha, and she's going to make all sorts of comments if she knows I'm doing this now. I can't be here alone since this is the type of restaurant only couples go to."
"You think I won't make comments?" Yelena raises her brow at Wanda, looking frighteningly similar to Natasha at that moment. "I thought you grew out of stalking Bug's dates in university."
Wanda doesn't reply, too busy staring at your table. Raye is making some kind of flirty comment, reaching across the table and lacing your fingers through hers. You're laughing—Wanda can tell with how your shoulders shake. 
The restaurant you've chosen to take Raye to is a slightly upscale steak restaurant. You've ordered cocktails, a bottle of wine, and two appetizers to start. 
Raye's biting her bottom lip suggestively before she takes a sip of her wine, her index finger is stroking the back of your hand, and Wanda's wondering if she can bribe a waiter to spill a glass of beer on Raye accidentally. 
"Seriously, I know you're best friends, but this is out of hand. Just confess before Raye steals your girl and they get married."
Wanda whips her head back towards Yelena, eyes filled with indignation. 
"THEY WOULD NEVER—"
"SHHH," Yelena hisses, and they both have to hide behind their menus when you turn around and look. "Jesus Christ, Maximoff."
"They would never get married," Wanda huffs before peeking outside her menu to see that you've returned to your conversation with Raye. But then she turns back to Yelena. "You know about my feelings? Did you always know? Did you—"
"Shut up," Yelena groans. "No, I was just fishing, and you're the sucker I caught. I mean, was there a time I thought you guys were too close? Yes, but it eventually became normal."
The two of them put their menu's down when it's safe, and Yelena seems to be carefully planning how to explain her thoughts. 
"We've all accepted that you guys are very close, but you both kept dating different people—you specifically only dating boys and then Vision. It worked out that we were all going to NYU, but did you know that Bug had an offer to study abroad and do an internship that would've accelerated her graduation and then career?" Yelena carefully looks at Wanda's face.
"What?" Wanda frowns. She vaguely remembers you mentioning the program but recalled you dismissing it. You didn't tell her you were offered a spot in the program. "No, but I mean, she was building her online platform, and it was taking off. She didn't need to do an internship."
"No," Yelena agreed with a shrug, "but it wouldn't have hurt. I suspect she couldn't stand the idea of being away from you for a year. Just like how you turned down the job offer in LA at graduation when you knew she would stay in NYC."
"That wasn't—I just—" Wanda huffs. "I like where I am now. My work is flexible." 
"Yeah, but being in public relations, you could've been making twice the amount you are now," Yelena raises her brow again. "Although, at this point, I suspect you both chose adaptable careers in case one of you wanted to move to another city."
"That's not true," Wanda protests.
"Do you even like being a PR?" Yelena asks. "At least Bug loves photography. You, on the other hand, have a talent for PR, but it'd be just as easy for you to do anything else."
"I do like it," Wanda stresses. "It's easy, and the clients I've got keep me busy enough. Just because I don't spend all my time on it or talk about it doesn't mean I don't like it."
"But—"
"Enough talking, our food is coming, and you better be ready to leave at a moment's notice," Wanda cuts Yelena off as the waiter arrives and sets their food down. 
"Worst. Date. Ever," Yelena deadpans.
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As it turns out, Raye lives relatively close to the restaurant as you walk hand-in-hand back to her place.
And not too far behind, Wanda and a reluctant Yelena trail from a distance. 
"She's not going to Raye's house, is she?" Wanda whispers with a frown.
"Why not?" Yelena grunts, adjusting her leather jacket. "She has casual flings all the time, and by the looks of their date earlier, it went very well."
"Not. Helping," Wanda glares at Yelena. They enter a street filled with apartments, and Wanda is careful about not following too close and walking under the streetlights.
"This is psychotic," Yelena groans. "Can't we go home? I feel like a literal serial killer out here."
Wanda doesn't respond, just staring ahead as they continue to walk. You're swinging your hand back and forth, interlaced with Raye's. There's giggling, and Raye keeps leaning closer to say something to you. 
There's so much sexual tension that it's palpable from here, and Wanda wishes there was a serial killer out here. 
How was Wanda going to stop this? How was Wanda going to prevent you from going home with someone else?
Wanda picks up a small rock and chucks it hard toward your general direction, hoping to spook the two of you apart. Except, her aim is so terrible that it flies completely left and hits the car beside you instead.
The car alarm goes off, setting off flashing lights and a very, very loud beeping noise.
"Wanda, what the fuck—" Yelena is cut off when Wanda suddenly shoves her down into a bush and dives next to her. "Ow, you fucking—" Wanda slaps her hand over Yelena's mouth.
You and Raye look behind, completely perplexed, when no one is there. You try to check out the vehicle, but other than a small dent, nothing is wrong with the car otherwise. Since neither you nor Raye caused it, you continued walking.
It turns out Raye lived in the building just a few steps ahead. You both stand at the door, holding hands before Raye throws her arms around your neck, smirking. 
Wanda's about to pick up another rock when Raye moves in suddenly for a hot, searing kiss.
And when Wanda watches you kiss back, her hand goes slack. Something awful builds in the pit of her stomach, and there's nothing Wanda can do when she watches you go into the apartment. 
Yelena watches Wanda's crestfallen face and sighs. "Wanda—"
"Let's just get back to the car and go home," Wanda mutters as she stands up, not bothering to brush off the dirt, leaves, or twigs from her hair. 
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷ 
The car ride home is sickeningly pathetic—a new low for Wanda. 
"PLEASE DON'T BE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE. PLEASE DON'T HAVE SOMEBODY WAITING ON YOUUUU—" Wanda hoarsely cries out, tears streaming down her face. She's off-tune, and she's screaming more than she is singing. 
"Oh, god," Yelena sighs, bringing her hand to her face in embarrassment in the passenger seat. They've stopped at a red light, and the car beside them is staring at them strangely. "This is sad for even you, Maximoff."
Wanda doesn't even acknowledge that she heard Yelena, only belting out, "I'LL SPEND FOREVER WONDERING IF YOU KNEW—"
"Just kill me, just kill me, just crash this car and kill us both," Yelena mutters to herself. 
The house is dark when Wanda returns, not that it should be any surprise. Deep down, though, Wanda hoped you'd return home and somehow beat her to it. 
Wanda's eyes feel tired and raw from crying the entire way home. Yelena gave her a reluctant hug, mustering all her kindness into rubbing Wanda's back and kissing the crown of her head when it was buried in her friend's shoulder. 
Pulling out her phone, Wanda looks at her texts. One from work, a couple of Natasha, one from Vis, and one from Pietro. She stares at your name in her messages, but nothing comes even if she wills it. 
Instead, she shoots you a quick "hey :)" and puts her phone away. You'd unlikely answer, but Wanda couldn't help herself. 
Sighing, Wanda gets ready for the night, trying to not let her mind drift on what activities you and Raye could be doing.
Please let it be scrabble, please let it be scrabble, Wanda thinks as she finishes brushing her teeth. 
As she walks towards her room, she pauses. It's unlikely you'd return until tomorrow morning, maybe even noon. Biting her lip, Wanda turns and walks into your room instead, crawling into your bed under the sheets. She pulls the blanket up to her chin, inhaling your scent slowly.
It both comforts her and makes her heart twinge. 
After an hour, sleep falls upon Wanda easily, and she's nearly in a deep sleep when the lights suddenly turn on, and a yelp is heard.
Wanda wakes up suddenly, shooting up with her heart pounding that it's a robber, but it's just you standing at the door with your hand over your heart and chest heaving. 
"Oh my god, you scared the shit out of me!" You scold Wanda. "I totally thought you were my sleep paralysis demon!"
Wanda rolls her eyes at the comment but frowns as you calm yourself and rummage through your closet for sleeping clothes. "What are you doing at home? I thought you were going to sleep over at Raye's."
"She got a call in the middle of everything. It was her sister or something having some kind of meltdown. Raye says her sister can be dramatic, and it happens once a month, but she couldn't really hang up. I got sleepy waiting, but I didn't wanna crash there to just sleep on a first date," you answer. 
"I'm sure you would've gotten some in the morning," Wanda mutters.
"I guess, but feels weird since it'd definitely be rushed," you take off your jacket and socks before heading to the bathroom. "It's fine, we'll probably reschedule for another date." 
"Perfect," Wanda sighs as she starts to get up. 
"Stay there, brat," you tell her as you stand at the door. "If you're gonna sleep in my bed, you better commit to the sleepover."
Wanda sticks her tongue out at you, which you return before you leave.
Tapping her fingers against the sheets, Wanda smiles. Maybe the night wasn't so hopeless after all. 
PART THREE
1K notes · View notes
ibetonlosinghuskies · 6 months ago
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patience and pleasure pt 6
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summary: as paige packs to move to uconn, she starts to doubt herself. grasping for a sense of security, she goes to the one person she knows can make her feel better. azzi.
disclaimer: as always everything i write is fictional!
warnings: fluff, angst, emotional distress, mild anxiety mention.
word count: 4.6k +
author's note: ik this probably isn't what you were expecting lol, very sorry. i will be giving yall what you want very soon.
~flashback to july 2020~
paige's pov:
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i can't believe i'm doing this.
playing at uconn has been my dream since i was a kid, but now that it's finally happening i feel paralyzed. packing my stuff made things feel final.
i'm really leaving minnesota. everything i know is here.
who's going to build legos with drew? who's going to make my parents coffee in the morning?
my hands shake as i fold another shirt, memories flooding my mind. friday night games, late-night drives with the team, sunday morning cartoons with drew.
what if i'm not ready? what if i can't handle the pressure?
i'd been doing a good job keeping all this to myself. putting on my best smile for every interview, every photoshoot. i had a good enough support system too, my family, friends, fans. but behind every "congratulation", i felt their expectation. a standard of perfection only a prodigy could fulfill.
what if i let everyone down?
i can't let them see me crack.
it's not like i'm not grateful for the opportunity. this is all i've worked towards for years. it just hurts to leave everything behind, especially for a future i had no control over. i felt safe here, in this moment, i'm full of potential.
the weight of my potential weighs heavily on my shoulders, keeping me up at night.
i sink to the floor, surrounded by half-packed boxes. part of me wants to unpack it all, to pretend that time isn't moving forward.
my eyes snap up when i hear a knock at my bedroom door.
"hey kiddo," my dad says warmly, leaning against the door frame.
"hey," i reply weakly, putting on a smile. i feel his eyes scan my face, his expression warming with sympathy.
he knows my smile is fake.
"already packing? you don't leave for another week, it shouldn't take you that l—" he stops mid-sentence looking at my closet. "but with that shoe collection maybe you should've started a month ago," he teases, trying to make me smile.
"i just want to be ready," i say, sounding more insecure than i expected.
"it's okay to be scared, you know?" he starts, his voice gentle. "i know this is a big change."
"i just don't wanna disappoint anyone," i stand, continuing to pack my stuff, eyes glued to the floor.
"you could never disappoint us," he assures me. "we're all so proud of you, no matter what."
a mix of gratitude and homesickness rushes over me. i crumble over his words, a few tears escaping my eyes. walking slowly, he grabs me in his arms. we stand there for a moment, the heaviness of change lingering in the air.
"you know," he says suddenly, "i think azzi's still in town at her grandparents. why don't you give her a call?"
he's right, i usually visit her around this time of year. the thought of azzi brings a small smile to my face. memories of our summers spent together fill my mind—trips to the fair, month long sleepovers, sleeping in her clothes.
"not everything has to change, paige," his voice knowing, eyes gauging my reaction.
if anyone could understand what i'm going through, i'd be her.
"yeah, i'll give her a call," i nod, trying to shake my heartache.
"good," he says, walking to my door. "don't forget to leave some of your shoes behind. we don't need the whole state of minnesota wondering why there's a shortage."
i roll my eyes, laughing. "i'll think about it."
he gives me one last warm smile before closing my door. i take a deep breath, reaching for my phone.
azzi's pov:
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i'm sprawled across my bed, scrolling through my phone when it starts buzzing. paige's name lights up the screen, and i can't help but smile.
"hey p," i answer, my smile showing in my voice.
"hey az," she replies, and immediately i know something's off. her voice is quieter than usual, lacking its usual charm.
"you okay?" i ask, sitting up straighter.
there's a pause, i can almost feel her forcing a smile through the phone. "yeah, i'm good. just...packing."
packing. right. she's leaving soon.
i'm hit with a wave of anticipatory grief. i've been trying to avoid thinking about what it's gonna be like when she leaves. we'd fallen into such an easy routine. she's spent countless summers at my grandparent's house, becoming part of my family.
"how's that going?" i ask, trying to sound hopeful.
"it's...going," she laughs gently. "it's just a lot, you know?"
i do know. the spotlight she's received these past couple years has been intense, but paige made everything she did look effortless. her confidence carried off the court, giving her a new charisma.
she was so easy to love.
"yeah...it's a big change," my voice matching her quiet tone.
there's another pause, the soft hum of the phone. i listen for her breath, a sigh, some background noice. but nothing. i feel her worry through the phone.
"can i come over—"
"you should come ov—"
we say at the same time. "i'll pick you up tomorrow morning," i smile at the thought of finally getting to see her.
i hear her take a steadying breath, "okay," her voice sounding a bit lighter.
my mind starts to wander. what if i don't see her again for years after this? all this time, and i never thought i'd have to confront my feelings for her.
"hey, i'll call you later, okay?" i'm sad to end our call, but i didn't have time to waste.
"uh yeah," she says, sounding a bit disappointed. "talk to you later."
i hang up the phone, my mind racing, filled with all of her favorite things. that minnesota lynx jersey she loves, her favorite snacks, the lego sets she builds with drew.
i can't let her leave without knowing how much of me she's taking with her.
i start in my closet, sifting through my clothes. my fingers brush against the fabric of my favorite hoodie—the one paige always steals when she's here.
i pull the hoodie closer to my chest, hoping that, for a moment, i could capture the warmth of her hug. a mixture of my perfume and her shampoo. i swear no matter how many times i wash the damn thing, it always carries a piece of her. like the intricate stitching holding the fabric, our bond sewn into the core of who we are.
i run my fingers along the seams—strong, resilient, trustworthy. i guess some things are too deep to be washed away. maybe it'll remind her that no matter how far she goes, a part of us will always be intertwined.
she should have this. it's practically hers anyway.
next, i move to my bookshelf, scanning the titles. my eyes land on one of my favorite john green books, looking for alaska. every once in a while she'd ask me to read it to her so she could fall asleep. paige always claimed my books were boring, but sometimes i'd catch her leaning in, eyes wide and attentive, consumed in the story. maybe she'd finally get around to reading it herself.
lastly, i grab some scissors off my desk and head for my front porch. the old basketball hoop stands sentinel, a silent witness to countless hours of our shared passion. i run my fingers along the worn metal, remembering all the times we'd scrimmage until the streetlights flickered on. our laughter and trash talk echoing through the quiet neighborhood.
i tilt the hoop towards me cutting off a piece of the net. the frayed edges feel like memories slipping through my fingers.
she was my champion first.
before the world knew 'paige bueckers', i knew paige. the slight competitive spark she'd get in her eyes before every shot. her confident sway as she played, turning my front porch into an arena.
everyone is finally gonna see in her what i've known for years.
back in my room, i surveyed my collection. each item, a different memory. i reach under my bed, adding the final touch to my gift—an old lego set paige and i bought together a long time ago. i put off building it with her, claiming we should save it for a special night.
there is nothing more special than tomorrow night.
i want everything to be perfect. i find myself frantically cleaning the house at 2 am, as if paige hasn't visited countless times. i organize my bookshelf, fold clothes, anything to keep my hands busy and my mind from wandering to her.
my exhaustion finally takes over and i lay sprawled across my bed. i try to sleep but she's all i dream about.
except these aren't the usual dreams.
a sequence of different visions flash through my mind, in each of them i'm losing her. we're on a basketball court, but something's off. paige is wearing a uconn jersey, looking different in a way i can't quite place. older, more independent. i'm still in my high school uniform. we're on opposite sides of the court, the air between us heavy. i call out to her but no sound comes out.
i want to tell her something. but my throat tightens, restricting like it's trying to hold her too.
i wake up before the sun, in a cold sweat. it felt so real, almost predestined. a heavy ache in my chest lingers, still unable to articulate what i need to tell her. the thought of my nightmares becoming real ignites a motivation in me to figure it out. fast.
i close my eyes again, hoping for dreamless sleep this time.
tomorrow, i'll find the words. i'll make sure i do.
paige's pov:
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the sun peaks through my blinds, waking me up earlier than usual. awaking to the sight of half-packed boxes leaves me disoriented. but my heart flutters when i check my phone to find seven unread text from azzi.
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i'm gonna miss stuff like this the most.
glancing at the time, i start to pack a bag to stay the night. she technically didn't say i was sleeping over, but i know us well enough to know that i will.
i start throwing things into my bag—my favorite hoodie, some shorts, and a pillow. then i pause, remembering the last time we hung out at her grandparents' place.
everything i needed was already there.
i empty half the bag, smiling to myself. the hoodie she'd always let me wear, my toothbrush, that book azzi's always bugging me to read, even my favorite pillow. they're all still at her place.
i'm reaching for my phone to tell her i'm ready when i hear my doorbell. smoothing out my hair, i nearly trip down the stairs running to answer the door.
i take a quick breath. even after all this time, i still want to look good for her. the moment i open the front door i'm met with azzi's smile, carrying two coffees in her hands.
everything i need is right here.
"i'm surprised you're not still in your pajamas," she smiles, handing me a coffee.
"what? no, of course not. i've been up for hours," i lie, letting her roll her eyes at my comment.
"mhm," she turns walking to her car.
i glance at her while she walks, her attitude showing in her posture. within just a few seconds, i already feel lighter.
the drive there is both long and short. as we pull up to her grandparents' house, i feel a wave of nostalgia. how many summers have i spent here? how much of me will i be leaving behind?
azzi's grandma is already at the door as we get out of the car. "paigey!," she calls out, her voice warm and welcoming. "how's our little superstar?"
"hi grandma fudd," i mumble, as she pulls me into a hug. i feel like a kid again in her arms.
"look at you," she says, holding me at arm's length. "more beautiful every time i see you."
i blush bashfully at her compliments. "hey, what about me?" azzi pouts from behind us.
"oh hush, you too," she pulls azzi into a deep hug. "i'm glad you finally came, paige. i was worried you weren't gonna make it this year. azzi here hasn't stopped talking about you since your last visit."
i shoot azzi a look, raising my eyebrows at her. she blushes, looking away.
once inside, memories pass me by like a warm summer breeze. the creaky third step on the stairs, the faded marks on the doorframe where azzi and i measured our heights every summer. old family photos lining the hallway, many of which include me.
azzi leads me up to her room, her hand gently tugging at mine excitedly. i let her lead like it was my first time in this house.
as we enter her room, i can't help but notice how clean it looks. her bookshelf organized by size and color, desk clear and neat. i almost miss the messiness of it all, the way her personality leaked all over her bedroom walls.
had she cleaned everything for me?
i scan her bedroom walls, all of which are covered in photos of us. photos from practice, summer trips to the lake, championship games.
her bedroom a museum of us, a bold testament to our bond.
"you kept all of these?" i asked softly, touching the corner of a photo from years ago.
azzi shrugs, a slight blush coloring her cheeks. "of course," she clears her throat nervously. "only because i look so good in them," she laughs failing to hide her affection.
i turn to her, ready to tease her about being sentimental, but the words die on my lips. she's holding something behind her, smiling with her eyes.
she takes a deep breath, bringing her hands forward slowly. in them is a carefully wrapped package, similar to the half-packed boxes littering my floor at home.
"i, uh, got you this. well, more like...put together." she hands me the box.
my fingertips brush against hers, heart racing as i look up into her eyes. "az, you didn't have to—"
"just open it, p," she interrupts, her voice soft and eager.
i unwrap the box, finally catching sight of its contents. it feels like all of the air has been sucked out of the room, it's all too much for me. her favorite hoodie, a worn copy of looking for alaska, a piece of frayed net from the hoop on her porch. and...is that the lego set we bought a long time ago?
all pieces of us, delicately put together in a small brown box.
"az..." i whisper, blinking away tears.
"i wanted you to have a piece of home to take with you," she explains, her eyes seeking my reaction. "so you didn't forget me—us."
i look up at her, my vision blurring the edges around her face. a warmth in my heart builds, surrounded by fragments of us. the finality of it all finally hit me.
how can we pack all of us into a box? years spent together, inseparable for the longest time, just to be neatly packaged in a cardboard box.
there's still so much i want to take with me. how do you package the sound of azzi's laugh? the feeling of her hand in mine? how do i fold up the comfort of her presence and tuck it neatly into a suitcase?
our friendship is a living, breathing thing. packing it away feels inhumane. she will never be a cardboard box i push into the back of my closet, the back of my mind. azzi's warmth pulses underneath my skin. she's the movement that pushes the blood through my body.
i realize something now. home isn't minnesota. it isn't my house or even this one.
home is azzi. and i'm about to leave it behind.
the weight of this box, however light in pounds, pulls me to the floor. my knees buckling underneath me, unable to form a coherent sentence. i'm drowning in a sea of emotions, waves of nostalgia and fear crashing over me. i cry, clinging to the box, like a life vest. my breath comes in short gasps, like i'm barely keeping my head above water.
i hear her call my name, but i can't respond. her voice feels far, muffled by my own emotion. i want to reach out, to tell her i'm okay, but my body won't cooperate.
azzi's hoodie wraps around me like a buoy, keeping me from sinking into the depths of my fears. the book, a raft of memories. the piece of net becomes a rope, pulling me to the shore of home—to her.
i can feel her worry radiate off her in waves, matching the momentum of my fear.
azzi's my anchor, solid and hopeful, grounding me in this storm. her hands cup my face, holding me like water, wiping away the flood.
her touch is gentle, safe. i lean into it instinctively, she always knows how to bring me back to myself.
looking up, i meet azzi's gaze. her eyes are a mirror of my own—a mix of worry, empathy, and something deeper. something that's been left unspoken between the two of us for a long time.
i feel her eyes search my face, a warmth that cuts through the chill of my tears.
azzi's looking at me like i'm her anchor too like she's just as terrified of drifting apart.
"paige, look at me," she says softly, also crying, wiping away my tears before her own.
i force myself to focus on her face. the wetness of her eyelashes, the trembling of her breath, her flushed cheeks—anything to slow my thoughts.
she sits on her knees, catching my tears in her palms. "you're not losing me, okay?" her voice reassuring, but also breaking between her tears.
"okay," i mumble sniffling. before i can thank her or apologize, she pulls my forehead to her lips. they tremble softly against my skin, her sadness showing but insistent on soothing me first.
azzi pulls my head into her chest, stroking my hair gently. i wrap my arms around her waist firmly, thinking that maybe if i hold her tightly enough, i can keep her here—in this moment, forever.
my tears begin to settle as i focus on her heartbeat, trying to memorize it. each beat a resilient promise, a faint whisper of trust, something to hold on to.
we stay there for a moment before azzi pulls back, staring at me with such a tenderness it almost sets me off again.
my eyes fall on the lego set peeking out of the box, and i can't let but let out a shaky laugh. "you're finally letting me build this," i smile, "it only took me almost moving away, huh?"
azzi's face breaks into a small grin, relief showing in her eyes. "like i'd trust you to build it on your own. someone's gotta make sure you read the instructions."
"hey!" i gasp in mock offense. "instructions are for people who don't know what they're doing, i'm a professional lego architect."
"oh we'll see about that," she jabs, opening the box.
azzi's pov:
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as we build the lego set together, i can't help but steal glances at paige. i read the instructions to her but she's definitely not listening. already working at the pieces, her focus is unbreakable. her tongue pokes out slightly as she concentrates. it's so quintessentially her, it makes my heart ache.
the day passes by in a blur of laughter and shared memories. it isn't until i notice how dark my room has gotten that i realize we've spent hours on my bedroom floor.
"see, i don't need instructions," paige says, proudly showing off the part she's assembled.
"yeah, whatever," i laugh, admiring her confidence.
we're interrupted by a soft knock at my door, the scent of fresh-baked cookies wafts from behind the door. i open the door to my grandma, always the perfect host, holding a plate of chocolate chip cookies.
she smiles warmly, "i thought you two might want a cookie break."
paige lunges up from the floor almost pushing me over, reaching for the plate. "you're gonna have to send some of these to connecticut," she says, between mouthfuls.
she laughs at her comment, "i wanted to give you this also," in her other hand she hands me an old film camera. "maybe you can capture something special," she smiles before closing the door.
"your grandma makes the best cookies," paige's voice muffled under the sound of her chewing.
before she can react, i snap a photo of her. the camera clicking in a way that makes me giggle.
"hey, i wasn't ready!" she snatches the camera out of my hands. "you're always the model anyways," she says, snapping a photo of me.
i give her a fake smile, still reaching for the camera. "happy now? give it back," i laugh, chasing her around my room.
"not until you give me a real smile," she holds the camera above her head.
"that's not gonna work, we're the same height, stupid," i reach for the camera nearly knocking it out of her hands.
"one picture, with a smile," she takes the camera up to her eye to look through the viewfinder.
i give her another impatient smile. she kneels down dramatically, shifting back and forth while snapping photos.
"okay, my turn," i reach for the camera again.
"these aren't real smiles," she pokes my side, making me giggle. "see there it is, hold still."
i drop my smile and pout dramatically. paige moves the camera away from her face and lunges towards me, jabbing at my sides. "stop, paige," i giggle, swatting at her hands.
she dodges me, her fingers continue relentlessly. i push her onto my bed, using my body weight to keep her still. we fight for a moment squirming around my mattress before i pin both of her wrists down. satisfied, i grin down at her. our laughter comes to a soft stop and we're both breathless.
"see, was that so hard?" paige tilts her head to the side, still out of breath. she attempts to reach her hands up again but i tighten my grip.
"oh, whatever," i roll my eyes, leaning closer to her, my hair draping over her face.
"can i tell you something?" she starts, her voice sounding a bit more serious.
"hm?" i respond, still satisfied i could hold her still.
paige hesitates for a moment, her eyes searching mine. "i've never actually had my first kiss," her cheeks flushing a light pink. "i thought i would've by now, before college, you know?"
i loosen my grip on her wrist, "oh, i had no idea. i figured plenty of guys would be lining up to kiss the paige bueckers," i tease.
"i guess," she looks away bashfully, "i just want it to be with someone special. someone i care about," her voice lowering to a whisper.
there's a silence that hangs between us. i feel my heart pounding in my chest. "like who?" i ask quietly.
i need to hear her say it.
her eyes flicker to my lips briefly before meeting my eyes again. "like...you," she says nervously, almost asking it like a question.
was she saying what i think she was?
"really?" i lean closer to her, my eyes wide and hopeful.
she lets out a nervous breath, her eyes intently locked on my lips. "yeah," she whispers, blinking quickly.
before i can overthink it, she leans in, closing the gap between us. her lips meet mine softly, and my hands reach for her face. i feel a nervous tremble in her lips, soft and warm. the pure flavor of her lips, tasting like vanilla and chocolate. her hands move to my waist, her thumb swaying slightly. we move slowly, gently, not wanting to rush this moment.
our kiss is tender like a warm summer night. her lips move sweetly and determined like she's thought of this before. her hands stroking softly saying "i've wanted this. wanted you."
when she pulls back i feel a new kind of emptiness. how am i going to live with the absence of her touch? she's opened a crack in my heart, long enough for the light to come in.
kissing paige was like sunlight embodied.
we stare at each other for a moment. caught in this new in-between.
what do you say after you kiss your best friend? how do you tell her it was your first kiss too?
"i'm glad it was you," she smiles, sitting up.
"yeah, me too," i murmur, my voice full of emotion. i lean to the side, still dazed from her touch.
"it's getting late, we should probably—" she starts.
"yeah...um," i respond uneasily, standing up to walk over to my closet. i grab one of my old t-shirts and a pair of shorts. "you can wear these to sleep in."
paige takes the clothes from me, her fingers brushing against mine. when we touch this time, it feels different, heavier. she heads to the bathroom to change, and i let out a breath i didn't know i was holding in.
even being just a room over, it feels like she's slipping through my fingers. i'm reminded of my nightmares from last night, paralyzed by the thought of losing her.
i need to tell her.
i grab a piece of paper and pen off my desk, my hands quivering slightly as i start to write.
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the first part of the letter flows easily. but as i continue, i feel a shift. the truth hanging in the space between my pen and the paper.
she deserves the truth. and i owe it to myself, to finally tell her.
my heart races, searching for the right words as i continue...
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i reread the letter, feeling vulnerable under my own words.
what if this ruins everything? what if she doesn't feel the same way?
i glance at my bedroom door, knowing paige could return at any moment. the panic sets in and i make a split-second decision. my hands shake as i tear the paper in half.
the first part, full of friendship and encouragement. it's a bit more sentimental than usual but not enough to make her suspect anything. i fold it neatly, placing it atop the other objects in the box. it's safe, expected.
the second part, my true feelings for her. i can't bring myself to throw it away, but i'm not ready for her to read it either. i tuck the small slip into the final pages of the last chapter of the book i'm giving her.
maybe one day i'll find the courage to tell her. maybe someday she'll finish the book and know how i really feel. but for now, this feels safe.
i don't know if i'm hoping she finds it or not.
as i hear the bathroom door open, i quickly close the book, sealing my fate. my heart pounds with the weight of my unspoken words.
my thoughts cease when i see her in my clothes. she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, looking unabashedly herself. for a moment, i see our future. imagining our closets becoming one, holding her as she falls asleep, an endless sleepover.
how am i supposed to let her go?
she catches me staring and smiles softly, a knowing glint in her eyes that makes my heart ache. without speaking, we settle into our usual routine. i let her sleep on my favorite side of the bed, she shifts around, trying to get comfortable. eventually, she turns on her side, her back facing me.
right before i drift off to sleep, i hear her call out to me. "azzi," she whispers softly into the dark.
"hm?" i answer, struggling to keep my eyes open.
"can you hold me?"
her voice gentle and vulnerable, as if i could hold every piece of her together. "of course," i wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her in closer. she sinks into my touch, her breath slows.
she drifts to sleep quickly in my arms, our heartbeats syncing. the weight of our unspoken words between us, laying heavily on my chest, pushing me towards a deep sleep.
i dream of never having to let her go.
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maxybabyy · 1 month ago
Text
winter warmers day 5: praise (maxiel)
In the end, it’s a padel comment that makes him snap.
It’s just the two of them for once, a quick session before lunch. Max prefers doubles, he knows, someone to share the blame with when he stumbles over the ball and throws the racket halfway across the court. But Lando is still in London, and Charles refuses to be on a team with Max. George is – they don’t really talk about George.
Daniel wins, and it’s not even close.
There’s a perverse charm in watching Max lunge after the ball and still fail to hit it, to send the ball back onto his side where it lands just inside the line, Max sprawled miserably on the court. The fondness in his chest grows and expands until everything else becomes easier to ignore.
He doesn’t gloat, but his chest puffs out as they make their way back to the locker room. Both of their rackets held in one hand with the other wrapped around Max’s waist as he runs them through the game, tearing apart the data like this too he can master with enough practice. And then –
“ – you were of course great, Daniel. It’s just me who is shit. Your backhand is getting really good.”
“Don’t have to lay it on so thick, babe,” Daniel laughs but for some reason, it comes out a little too forced. The water tastes sour on his tongue as he swirls it around, and the hangnail on his thumb bleeds when he worries at it.
“What? It was a good game, Daniel. Always it is so impressive how quickly you have become good. Victoria has played for a while now also, and she is still so shit too.”
“Cut it out, Max.” Daniel says. He tries to soften his voice but there’s a lump in his throat that won’t let him, that threatens to make this shit even more embarrassing than it already is. “I don’t need – whatever it is you’re trying to do, I’m good, yeah? So just, don’t.”
Because that’s the fucking thing, isn’t it?
Max is so competitive only about a handful of things, but somehow padel has become one of them. Max with his 23 rackets that are all custom-made and in no way make him more likely to hit the ball. Daniel’s still not convinced it isn’t some sort of multi-level-marketing scheme, but then Max has the money for it.
Despite the low stakes, Max is not a very gracious loser. He is never shy about his critiques or calling out fouls, and Daniel knows he keeps a record of his and Victoria’s matches, updating the tally whenever she comes into town.
So it’s a little bit surprising how quick he is to praise Daniel’s performance. Only maybe it isn’t.
He doesn’t know when, but Max lately has been thorough in showing his appreciation. The sourdough Daniel had remade after killing Victoria’s starter. The tiles he had spent two days putting up in the bathroom of the new apartment. Wrangling all the animals into tiny hats and making them sit still for their Christmas photoshoot. Teeny-tiny fucking things that everyone could have done, and Max still won’t stop running his mouth.
“Daniel, the bread is so lovely, you made this here? In our oven?”
“Daniel, the tile looks very nice, the orange is of course a good choice. The sun from the windows, I think will look very pretty.”
“Donut, ha! You got him a little hat! And Sassy too, she looks so lovely, Daniel. Jimmy of course looks silly, but this is so good. Always you are such a good photographer, Daniel. Will you have them printed out?”
But Daniel isn’t a kid, he doesn’t need to be coddled and praised for doing shit he’s supposed to do.
“I know I don’t have a – that I’m not driving right now,” Daniel says, forces it out between clenched teeth. It still hurts so fucking much to say, but he has to, needs to make it clear that this shit won’t fly. “I don’t know if you still feel bad for me or whatever is going on, but –“
Max lets out a noise of protest, and Daniel is already turning around, readying himself for an argument. But he catches him in the middle of wiping his forehead, shirt pulled up to show off his tits, freckled skin that shines with sweat and warmth. And Daniel’s always been weak for Max like this.
Max lets go of his shirt and reels Daniel in instead, kisses him with soft lips until he loses some of the tension in his shoulders.
“You are in a shit situation, Daniel,” Max tells him, and at least they both fucking know that. “But always what matters is that I love you. I don’t care that you are not racing, you can never race again, and it will not matter. You could be shit at it, and I will of course still be in love with you.”
“But –“
“No, Daniel,” Max says firmly. “It does not matter to me, but it is so lovely for me to watch you be so good at everything you do. Dirt biking at the farm, playing with Luka, baking those very nice treats for the cats. It makes me very happy, Daniel, so of course I will want to tell you always.”
Daniel kisses him again, presses them against the lockers until he can feel Max’s heart beat against his. His head spins and there’s a breath stuck in his chest, but it is in the best fucking way.
“You probably would’ve cared a little, yeah?” Daniel teases, lips still pressed against Max’s. “If I had been shit at racing.”
Max laughs, loud and bright, and Daniel should never have doubted him. “Yes, it is of course much better like this, Daniel.”
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