#this one is rpetty long

[yael-things]

i have conflicted feelings about having a diary because i dont say many things here since i write them instead so i always remain cool and mysterious but also i like ranting to my friends

[chuurroez]

the day 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 me

ღ pairing: Sung Hanbin x gn!reader, set in non-idol verse ^^

ღ genre: angst, really bad angst.

ღ warnings: i'm not sure if there is any, if there is, please tell me!

ღ summary: you wondered where it went wrong, was it you? or was it him that went wrong? you wanted to know answers to your questions that you knew wouldn't be answered.

ღ notes: hi! this fic is inspired by laufey's latst release 'california and me', i suggest listening to the song before continuing to read this fic! tysm to the people who voted on my poll. this isnt in order of the actual song and i skipped a few lines for the fic to make more sense. do you guys want a part 2 of this btw? im sorry if this is rpetty short, the lyrics weren't as long as i thought. :(

ღ word count: 970

''Should've figured that you'd go back to New York Don't consider me when you run back to her"

Sung Hanbin was the perfect boyfriend for you, he was everything you'd want for a partner. He was caring, loving, respectful, kind, affectionate, he was perfect. almost. He became distant from you the past few weeks, you always wondered why. You tried to ask him why he was becoming more and more distant from you but he always said he was just stressed and busy. You knew he was lying, whenever he and problems, he would always open up to you about it. On the earlier stages of your relationship with him, he told you about his ex in New York, the same place he'd be going back to for her. You should've figured that he'd go back there anyways, your relationship has been going downhill ever since he became more and more distant from you. You knew you were just a distraction from her when Hanbin broke up with his ex, a distraction from all the pain he felt when she left him.

"You don't have to hide it, I know why you went Said you needed space, I know better than that"

He tried his best to hide the real reason he went back to New York, for her. He reasoned that he needed space for a while for his departure but you both knew it was a lie. You knew the actual reason of his leaving, he was like an open book that you read very well. He thought you were oblivious to his actions, but of course you knew better than that. You knew he lost his feelings for you, you knew he never truly loved you in the first place. His heart still belonged to her, the woman he first loved and still loved. He didn't care that you were a distraction for his aching heart, he waited and waited for her to come back. I guess she did so after all, huh.

"Could've fought for you but I just let you leave Hurt too much to consider you didn't love me''

You had a choice of trying to let him stay, but you just let him go. It would've been a failed attempt anyways, he never actually loved you. It broke your heart to think that he maybe never for once thought about you for you. He just thought about you as her. You wonder if you looked or acted the same way as she did, you would've been correct after all, right? You stayed speechless the time he waved goodbye at you, it gave you a glimpse of hope that he would come back, but deep in your heart you knew it would never happen. You wanted you to say something, but you stayed with your gut that said to just be quiet for the sake of it. You didn't want to ruin this moment for him just for you.

''I imagine you holding her in your arms Laughing 'bout how I thought that you were the one"

You tried your best to think positive and stay happy without Hanbin, but your mind said no. You imagined him holding her in his arms, laughing about how oblivious you were to Hanbin's plans. You thought how crazy it was for you to fall for his tricks. I mean, who wouldn't? He was charming in every single way possible, who wouldn't be able to resist his charms? Your mind clouded with all the thoughts of Hanbin and his ex living their best lives, especially Hanbin, he got to live his life without you, you were like an old t-shirt that was thrown away because it didn't fit the its owner anymore. You didn't blame him for that, you always thought she was better even if you didn't know what she was like. She should've been better than you for Hanbin to go back to her, right?

''Left me and the ocean for your old flame Holding back my tears, I couldn't make you stay''

Beach dates were Hanbin's favorites, or were it her favorites? Did he force himself to go on beach dates with you because they reminded them of her? You loved going on those beach dates as well, it made you feel as if you and Hanbin were the only people there, it made you feel...free. You tried your best to hold back your tears that were already on the verge of escaping as Hanbin went on the plane. You saw a glimpse of his face that somewhat looked...sad? You didn't care much though, all that was on your mind was the person you loved most in life just left, but he needed space from you, didn't he? You couldn't make him stay, you wanted to but you didn't have the courage to do so. Maybe it was the fact that maybe your were the problem in the relationship? Maybe it was actually you?

"Can't quit this, so damn wicked to leave California and Me"

It was so cruel, so damn wicked for him to leave you behind. He didn't even explain why he was so distant from you, but you didn't need it though, right? He left for her. The person he loved most with you being the next. You met Hanbin in California, in which your relationship with him bloomed more and more, but all flowers have to wilt in the end, California was the same place he left you. Who knew that your relationship with him would start and end at the same place? A part of you despised him for his cruelness, the other part knew he needed this and stayed hopeful that the negative things you thought about would never happen. I guess you were right after all, weren't you?

likes, comments, reblogs, and feedbacks are greatly appreciated!

[goffilolo]

Demise shitshow chat highlights part 2

BONUS:

[jawanaka]

Fic Writer Review

 (Was tagged by @do-androids-dream-ao3acc and, I think, @brujahinaskirt way back. Thank you all!

1. How many fics on AO3?

Four (sad, low energy)

2. Total AO3 wordcount?

93193 (again, weak)

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

So on AO3 I have written for three, The Witcher, Cyberpunk 2077 and Kingdom come: Deliverance. Way back I’ve written Star Trek fanfic and, when really young, Star Wars.

4. Top Five by Kudos?

I mean there’s four in total...

Love is the Value of Life  is my highest rated one at 92 and I am rpetty happy with it. Writing one of the most popular pairings of the fandom helps though.

The Swallow of Novigrad is my number 2 and it is of course my baby that I dearly love.

You cannot go home again (again) is number 3 at 33. My other Cyberpunk 2077 fic, more angsty stream of consciousness I think.

The Thousand Winters of Lord Hans Capon is number 4 at a paltry 15. But then again its by far the smallest fandom.

5. Do you respond to comments, why/why not?

Always. Love comments, especially long once that give you an opportunity to dissect the fic with others. Even if it is just a short note I make sure to answer.

6. What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I don’t realy consider myself an angst writer but it has to be The Thousand Winters of Lord Hans Capon given the ending. 

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

Nope, never have and probably never will. Usually don’t like them unless it’s total crack

8. Have you received hate on a fic?

No, thats a good thing about the lack of attention I suppose.

9. Do you write smut?

No I usually keep it pretty PG-13. But who knows...

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge...

11. Ever had a fic translated?

Yes! In fact, our very own @herbalina-of-yesteryear is currently working on the chinese translation of Swallow, to be found here. Also there’s been talk of a Russian translation but I’m not sure what happened with that...

12. Ever co-written a fic before?

Not recently. Back in the day I worked on this big collaborative Star Trek project with a bunch of other writers. We technically each wrote our own stories but we planned and plotted together (the concept was that we produced a series and each writer wrote one or more “episodes”).

13. All time favorite ship?

Oooh, good question. Not sure actually.

14. What's a WIP you want to finish, but don't think you ever will?

In this house we finish our WIPs.

15. What are your writing strengths?

Setting descriptions and dialogue.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Describing inner thoughs and feelings

17. What are your thoughts of writing dialogue in other languages?

AS I learned back in my anime fanfic reading days, avoid fandom japanese or fandom any language.

18. First fandom you wrote for?

I think I gotta say Star Wars!

19. Favorite fic you've ever written?

Gotta go with Swallow. The first long fic anything I wrote and still my baby.

So I think between them @do-androids-dream-ao3acc and @brujahinaskirt have asked everybody I know but if anyone else see it and want to answer feel free :)

[presunday]

alright so here s' the pla,n

current sleep schedule (very fucked up) is like, go to bed at 2 am wake up between 8-10am? kinda gotta random effect governng that one, moving on I schedule work from .. 8 am to 2 am, yeah so that part works rpetty wel Oh except where I just Get Up and FUcking Leave for FIVE HORUS ON END for a bike ride + walk through half the city + buying presents for The Bureaucracy (my parents( anyway so for the sleep the plan is i fix that by actually not fixing it but progressively worsening it until studio day and then Realigning it by the jetlag + massive disaster that will be sleeping in Heathrow's int'l terminal on the night of the 15th -> 16th of december, and the nthe jetlag oh yes thejetalg the sweet release of getting on the airplane and just dying until I 'm in Dlalas wfort worth ,my home my sweet savoir allen teasxas my cradle my hearth how I long to sit at the greenville exchange intersection how I long to be far and close and distant and enar and all that................

[sirwolficus]

Lantern maple harvest

lantern - how did you meet your best friend? What were your first impressions of each other?

honestly i have two best friends whom i love with my entire being and i would actually kill for, and its a weird story how i met the both of them. the first best friend i have is (obviously) @artsysouleater who i think is dead on here?? but we met a few years ago when i was wearing a snapback with a shit ton of buttons (cause i collect them son) and they walked over to me intending to talk to a mutual friend but instead came over to me and was like hey!!! u got some cool ass buttons dude!!! i was like :0 thanks you cute bean!! do u want to look at them?? and i was pointing at them and explaining what they were while they were like mhm mhm cool, i pointed to a doctor who button i have and said “this ones doctor who, or professer why haha’ and immediately was like FUCK FUCK THEY DIDNT GET IT and then artsy said was that,,,, eddswowld,,, and then a long lasting friendship was born and at this point were stuck together they cant get rid of me

the second best friend i’ll just refer to as V cause she aint on tumblr but she is AMAZING OK. she can be kinda insane sometimes but honestly me too so i cant complain (also she is REALLY HOT AND ATTRACTIVE and honestly i used to have a mega crush on her woops). at our school we have this thing called “the big event” since its an arts school, where you can choose two workshops or something (they change it every year) and i wanted to do a drama one and an artsy one. me and artsy (we were friends at this point) were given a yoga class cause the one we wanted as the second workshop were full so thats always fun, and i am ABSOLUTE SHIT AT YOGA. i have no balance bitch like oh my god. artsy was way better than me tbh. from beside me tho, V speaks up and says “hey dude its ok!! im really bad at yoga too haha” and bitch she is worse than me and thats a powerful feat!!! we basically chatted through the yoga class with me forcing artsy to talk too kind of idk it was two years ago i dont rlly remember, and i during this summer i was like hey,, V,,, is rpetty and talented and i lov her she is now my official best friend numero dos and now i have matching contact names and a groupchat and its amazing i love them so much

for the first impressions i actually asked my friends (artsy and V in that order) and they gave me permission to post pics of their texts with their pics and most of the names blocked out so you can actually see what they said lmao

my first impressions were basically the same, when i first met artsy i was actually begging god PLEASE let them be gay and like the same things i like (at the time it was mostly eddsworld cause i was real obsessed with it) and we spent an entire lunch period just talking about fandom stuff, i followed them on tumblr like immediately and made them follow me back HA, and when i first met V i immediately said to myself “i want her to be my girlfriend”, i was super charmed by her honestly the gayness was real!!

maple - is there a hobby / skill that you’ve always wanted to try but never did?

ive actually always wanted to play violin/guitar, but i dont have the fingers for that stuff. i say that bc with guitar it helps to have tougher finger pads (which i definitely do not have) and violin i just dont have the patience for it woops

harvest - what fictional character do you most identify with? Why?

okay thats a really hard one.. but if im being honest it would be Ann from Parks and Recreation, a show i literally was just watching this evening lmao, mostly because of the logic she uses and that time when chris broke up with her but she didnt even fuckin realise it thats me bitch oh my god

i honestly couldve said an oc that i have, that some people who pay attention to my oc art may know as t/tycho (who was actually recently renamed to aicho) but i dont think that counts because that oc used to be a self-insert character, again they arent anymore but their personality is still too close to my own so i dont rlly think they would count

[ofbowlegs-blog]

Send “✆” for a MORNING text. Send “✉” for a text that WASN’T SENT. Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text. Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text. Send “#” for a RANDOM text. Send “@” for a SCARED text. Send “&” for a LOVING text. Send “%” for a CURIOUS text. Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text. Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text. Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text. (Astrid)

text memes.

Send “✆” for a MORNING text.

[ text. ]   going for a drive this morning if you wanna come with?

[ text. ]   i’ll buy you pancakes? :)

Send “✉” for a text that WASN’T SENT.

[ text. ]    sometimes you make me forget about all the crap and it’s not often i get to meet someone who can do that, so thank you

Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.

[ text. ]   thers someq ne here who loks like yu but not yo u at all

[ text. ]   becus youre so rpetty

[ text. ]   like

[ text. ]   gorgeous

[ text. ]   ou hva e a good face

Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text.

[ text. ]   do you still have that leia costume?

[ text. ]   just for reasons

[ text. ]   i know it irritated you but you won’t have it on for long, if you get my drift

Send “#” for a RANDOM text.

[ text. ]   i just had one of those fancy ass coffees and i totally get the hype now

Send “@” for a SCARED text.

[ text. ]   i got too close to a cat an hour ago and i still can’t stop sneezing. can you die from cat allergies???

Send “&” for a LOVING text.

[ text. ]   you are without a doubt one of the best people i’ve ever met. i mean that.

Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.

[ text. ]   how do you do it every day? being a hybrid? i only had to deal with it for one night and i couldn’t handle it.

Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.

[ text. ]   jurassic park marathon on tv today!!

Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text.

[ text. ]   there was a guy at the bar last night who looked a little bit like patrick swayze and honestly? get a few drinks in me and i would.

[ text. ]   sorry, astrid, that wasn’t meant to go to you but it still stands. 

Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text.

[ text. ]   i know it’s just sex but... the people that get involved with me or get close to me usually die or get hurt and i don’t want you to ever get dragged into my crap. but i also don’t want to stop this.

[fullspectrum-cbd-oil]

Broward County’s ‘Coward’ Deputy Finally Arrested for Doing ‘Absolutely Nothing’ to Stop Parkland Shooting

The “coward” former sheriff deputy from Broward County, Florida, who stayed outside Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in February 2018 while a shooter rampaged through the building was arrested by the Florida Department of Law Enforcement (FDLE).

On Tuesday, the FDLE issued a statement announcing it had arrested former Broward County Sheriff’s Office Deputy Scot Peterson on “seven counts of neglect of a child,” “three counts of culpable negligence and one count of perjury” for doing “absolutely nothing” to stop the school shooting.

The arrest came after a 15-month-long investigation into the “actions of law enforcement” after the horrific attack that claimed the lives of 17 people.

“The FDLE investigation shows former Deputy Peterson did absolutely nothing to mitigate the MSD shooting that killed 17 children, teachers and staff, and injured 17 others,” FDLE Commissioner Rick Swearingen said in the statement. “There can be no excuse for his complete inaction and no question that his inaction cost lives.”

FDLE has arrested former BSO deputy Scot Peterson. pic.twitter.com/JuePmaQ6wF

— Ryan Petty (@rpetty) June 4, 2019

Sheriff Gregory Tony said in the release that he was “pleased” to see the “thorough investigation” that led to the arrest of Peterson and stated that “all the facts” that showed the former deputy’s “failure to act” during the shooting “warranted both termination of employment and criminal charges.”

“It’s never too late for accountability and justice,” Tony added.

The release stated that, as shots rang out inside the school, Peterson remained outside “refus[ing] to investigate” the gunfire and “directed other law enforcement who arrived on the scene to stay 500 feet away from the building.”

As IJR previously reported, Peterson retired after the tragic attack and began taking a large monthly pension of $8,702.35 in April 2018 — two months after the shooting took place.

The former deputy was also named in a lawsuit by Andrew Pollock for the wrongful death of his daughter, Meadow, last year. Pollock stated that he was “not interested in any money” with the suit and instead wanted to have people around the nation “recognize what a coward he is.”

from IJR http://bit.ly/2wBhvNV via IFTTT

[backroombuzz]

Kyle Kashuv rips into Obama's Disingenuous Praise

Kyle Kashuv rips into Obama's Disingenuous Praise

Kyle Kashuv, shunned by the fake news media networks such as CNN because, unlike David Hogg, Kashuv was pro-Second Amendment and he stubbornly refused to kowtow to the left-wing media's anti-gun agenda. Like his fellow "March for our lives" classmates Kyle Kashuv is a survivor of the horrific shooting that took place at the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School this past Valentines day. Unlike his classmates, because of his pro-gun views, Kashuv never received the star treatment that was lavished upon the other survivors such as Davis Hogg and Emma Gonzales. There is no better example of this blatantly bias treatment from the media than the moment the liberal news networks nearly hyperventilated from their outrage towards FOX News Laura Ingraham. After Ingraham tweeted out that David Hogg was "whining" about not getting into college. The media were stepping all over themselves as they attempted to outdo one another in  showing their outrage over Ingraham's "Attack" upon David Hogg, a poor "Traumatized Child" who was a survivor of that abhorrent Parkland school shooting. Their reaction to the word "Whining" was vastily different after Vanity Fair and MSNBC contributor Kurt Eisenwald sent an incredulous email to Ben Shapiro, the fast-talking, big-brained owner of Dailywire.com and leading conservative voice. The email Eisenwald sent left Shapiro speechless. A feat that undoubtedly left his 1.34 million Twitter followers stunned at the seemingly impossible task of rendering Ben Shapiro mute. I just received this from @kurteichenwald. There are no words for how wild this email is. @VanityFair is apparently an odd place.I just received this from @kurteichenwald. There are no words for how wild this email is. @VanityFair is apparently an odd place. pic.twitter.com/Ik1bfjoKyl — Ben Shapiro (@benshapiro) April 3, 2018 In his wildly ambiguous disjointed diatribe, Eichenwald first claimed that Kashuv was working with trolls to covertly attack Eichenwald. Then claiming as fact "Kyle is in desperate need of psychiatric help or support." Still later in his rambling, chaotic letter, he accused Shapiro himself of secretly working with Kashuv to lure "One of us" into saying something stupid. If Kashuv and Shapiro had indeed been colluding, based on Eichenwald insane letter they made one hell of an effective team. If Ben Shapiro tweets out that something has left him speechless, that in itself would have created headlines. Add in the fact that a Parkland survivor was targeted, CNN would have created a 25-hour day, since 24-hours would never have contained the wall to wall outrage that would ensued. In spite of having all the ingredients any 24/7 cable news network could desire, barely a peep was heard from the same networks that just 2-weeks before nearly lost their minds over the word "Whining." Because Kashuv had to scratch and claw for every inch, many feel his voice carries more weight than those of David Hogg who, long ago was bought and paid for by the likes of Media Matters and George Soros. On Thursday, Time magazine released its list of the 100 most influential people. It included some Parkland survivors -- not surprising it listed only the pro-gun control survivors:  Cameron Kasky, Jaclyn Corin, David Hogg, Emma Gonzalez, and Alex Wind. These "Traumatized Children" have become fixtures on the set of CNN, who have repeated ad-nauseum the incredible impact these (anti-gun) Parkland kids have achieved in swaying public support for stricter gun control measures. As most things on CNN, it seems, according to the latest polling, CNN is just spewing more propaganda from this once-respected news network. Public support for stricter gun control laws surged in the wake of the Parkland shooting, but a recent Quinnipiac University poll showed support for stricter gun decreasing significantly. In fact, from its high just 2 weeks ago, 66% favored stricter gun measures. However, the latest numbers show that support was now only 56% supporting tougher regulations. It is interesting to note the 56% is lower than the support tougher gun measures had before the Parkland shooting. Nonetheless, Obama ignored the latest polling numbers and instead scribed a gushy tribute praising the pro-gun control students and crediting them with "shaking us out of our complacency" with their activism. .@BarackObama: “By bearing witness to carnage, by asking tough questions and demanding real answers, the Parkland students are shaking us out of our complacency” #TIME100 https://t.co/LYe1trmpPv — TIME (@TIME) April 19, 2018 Which spurred on a brutally honest retort from the battle tested Kashuv. This is so rich coming from @BarackObama. https://t.co/GNjZSg2bST — Kyle Kashuv (@KyleKashuv) April 19, 2018 In another tweet, Kashuv went right at Obama reprimanding him for not recognizing Andrew Pollack and Ryan Petty, both fathers of students killed during the massacre. "It's an absolute shame that @BarackObama gives no credit to @rpetty and @AndrewPollackFL who actually got the legislation passed," Kashuv wrote. Kashuv himself has not let being ostracized by the mainstream media slow him down. He had a sit down with President Trump and First Lady Melania, met with lawmakers on Capitol Hill and also Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas. To show the absolute vitriol that Kashuv has been facing. After he tweeted out a picture of himself and Justice Thomas. Bart Hubbuch former sports writer for The New York Post was completely triggered sending this little bit of insanity Kashuv's way.

Next on his busy agenda On Friday, April 20th, Kashuv plans to host a "Facebook Live" event from 10:00 AM-11:00 AM with an impressive lineup of guests discussing "ways to save lives without infringing on Americans 2nd Amendment rights. He will also lead a discussion on school bullying and mental health." Parkland @KyleKashuv to host global @facebook LIVE discussion on the 2nd Amendment and right to bear arms with @SebGorka, @mschlapp, @Scaramucci, @AndrewPollackFL, @KurtSchlichter, @charliekirk11, Robert B. Charles, and @kelliwardaz.https://t.co/Z2H8JwmcKl — Michael Moates 🇺🇸 (@freedom_moates) April 19, 2018   Read the full article