#this new season of VT RP is like the movie Clue but weirder

[rumor-weed]

Anything more on Stephan or this 'Cassidy'?

“Boy, I know ya asked this nine years ago, but we didn’t really have an answer ‘til now. Looks like Stephan - er, was it Stefan? Never knew how to spell that pronunciation - might’ve been disappeared by a few guilty vegetables who all seem to be claimin’ THEY did it. Maybe they all did. Maybe nobody did. How come they all got alibis for why they couldn’t have done it, but they’re all swearin’ they did? Stephan’s gone, though. We haven’t seen the prince in ages - rumor has it he wasn’t even a prince, Anon. Maybe he was just some rich kid pullin’ some weird of sort of prank, one of those scam ‘fake prince’ emails that found someone who took the bait. Could be. That’s just a theory. A Rumor Theory.”

Audrey paused and considered the next name.

“Cassidy… ah! The child Archibald adopted without really askin’ his wife first, huh? That’s a good question, Anon! But uh… well, I don’t think we ever got answers. Sometimes I wonder if she was even real. The twins sure weren’t! But we all thought we saw them, right? Weird. But Cassidy… well, I liked her fine, I guess. I’d hope, if she was real, she’s just grown up, unlike the rest of us, and escaped to somewhere safer. Something weird about this town. Water that makes ya never age? Vampires? Serial killers? Paparazzi for a mildly popular but dyin’ kids show? It just doesn’t add up. And now Archibald is back. He’s back, Anon, and I don’t know what to think of it. It just isn’t right. He claims not to remember the last ten years! But Lovey claims she murdered him. Well, he’s not the first person to come back from the dead, a little different from when we last saw him. There’s that whole Art Bigotti thing too. I wasn’t around when he was Jumanji’d, but there’s somethin’ fishy for sure with him. And Mom Asparagus, well, if she’s dead, who’s to say she’d stay dead either?”

Audrey nodded as she determined it. “Actually, I suppose, until we find her, she is simultaneously both dead and alive. Schrodinger’s Mom Asparagus, I guess. But who’s to say for sure? Do we really wanna open that box? Risk the smell? She’s been gone a few days now. Are answers really worth it? So whatever happened to the others who we haven’t seen in years, such as Stephan, Cassidy, or really anyone else, it’s impossible to know for sure who’s capable of comin’ back. Can’t say I’d mind, it’d shake things up a little. Lots more rumors to share. But uh, I just hope they have a good sense of humor. Ten years and a lot changes. We all just want to laugh and poke fun at the people we used to be, affectionately, because we know ourselves now. It’s nice to not take yourself too seriously, right?”

She gave the anon a long look, contemplating. Nine years waiting on an answer they must’ve long given up on. and yet, here she was, answering it all the same. Times moves on, but sometimes no matter how far we walk, we eventually end up in the same places again, just a little different from the last time we were here. She wondered if the anon, who really probably had left the message behind and forgot about it, was doing all right, wherever they were. It was hard not to wonder who wrote the message. A friend? A stranger? A neighbor? The creator of My Immortal?

Anything was possible.

And wasn’t that beautiful?

She looked forward, as if she were looking directly at the screen, and she curled her leaf into a ‘C’ shape. “And that’s how Audrey… ‘C’s it.”