#this just seemed like a self defense strategy in the moment

[shoku-and-awe]

Always wondered if there was a way to engage Full Wild Boy mode in my mild-mannered, antisocial, stoic, middle-aged cat-dog, and apparently the answer is red hibiscus and coconut melon pan.

Who knew??? Spice melange eyes and all.

[catofadifferentcolor]

Terrible Fic Idea #92: Percy/Apollo, but make it The Trojan War

Into every fandom, a time travel fic must fall - or in this case a second one, because I somehow got to thinking about the delightful PJO trope of Percy being thrown back in time to The Trojan War and realized that doing so misses out on a fantastic opportunity.

Or: What if post-TOA Percy Jackson and Apollo time travel to shortly before The Trojan War?

Just imagine it:

Everything follows canon through TOA, with one exception: rather than struggle to catch up in the mortal world following the Second Gigantomachy, Percy elects to stay at Camp Half-Blood. There he can homeschool at his own place with programs tailored towards ADHD children and still visit his family on the weekends - and not get into any more ridiculous situations in the mortal world when one of the gods kidnaps him or sends him on a quest to find their sneakers.

This, naturally, stresses his relationship with Annabeth - who, now that she's no longer living at camp full time, calls it the easy way out. But Percy is tired and struggling in mortal high school where everyone thinks he's a delinquent idiot when another option exists seems foolish. Percy and Annabeth break up and drift apart.

Enter Apollo, fresh from his latest stint as a mortal. He's trying to do his best by his children, which includes popping by camp as often as he can get away with - which in turn means spending a lot of time with Percy, who at this point is unofficially running CHB because it's not like Dionysus or even Chiron have done a brilliant job of it in recent times.

(First aid, strategy, and mythology classes are made mandatory. Percy personally ensures every demigod knows enough about self-defense to be able to survive long enough to run away or for help to arrive. Bullying is cracked down on so hard that it's this, not Percy's generally parental nature, that has people calling him Camp Mom.)

Percy and Apollo become friendly. Enough so that some of Apollo's kids assume they're dating and keeping it on the down-low so as not to draw Zeus' ire. Or Poseidon's. Or anyone else's. It's on one of their not-dates that they're yeeted into the past, without warning or explanation.

And so 19-year-old Percy Jackson and post-TOA Apollo find themselves in Ancient Greece c. 1220 BCE, roughly thirty-five years before the destruction of Troy.

The time travel is immediately obvious, as Apollo becomes the closest thing a god might experience to being high the moment they land in the past - being a powerful god in modern times is nothing like being a powerful god at the height of his power in ancient times. It's overwhelming (and somewhat alarming from Percy's POV, but kind of funny in retrospect.)

The specific date is harder to determine, but made clear when Hermes shows up and starts going on about you'll never believe what father's done now: he seduced the Spartan queen as a swan and she's laid an egg. Hera is furious - especially as they're saying the girl that hatched from it is the most beautiful in the world, even though she's only a few days old. It's nuts. By the way, where have you been? You missed the last two council meetings. Do you want Dad to punish you?

Apollo at this stage is very high. He's also been USTing over Percy for quite some time and is worried what the gods of this era might do to Percy without divine protection (smiting or seduction, it's all on the table). But mostly he's very high, and so to keep Percy close and safe he declares he's been off having the dirtiest of dirty weekends with his latest lover and that Hermes' presence is ruining the mood. So if he would kindly leave, please and thank you, he'd really rather get back to it without an audience.

This, naturally, is a surprise to Percy, but he rolls with it because 1) he doesn't have any better ideas on how to get rid of Ancient Greek Hermes so they can figure out what the hades is going on and 2) he's been USTing over Apollo ever since he recovered enough from Tartarus to start feeling attraction again.

Fueled by mutual UST, they put together a cover story that should hold the next time a god with too much prurient interest shows: Percy is now Prince Persē of Gadir - a Phoenician colony that will grow into the future Cadiz - well past the edge of the Greek world at this stage but not beyond belief for Poseidon to have visited, as it's obvious who his father is. They claim his mother is the King of Gadir's youngest sister and as such Persē had a royal upbringing, but was far enough down the line of succession that he was free to chose to sail east and explore his father's homeland. Apollo caught sight of him on his journey, one thing led to another, and here they are.

(Are there easier, more sensible cover stories? Possibly. But the UST refuses to let them consider any of them now that a fake relationship is on the table.)

Deciding what to do about The Trojan War is much harder. On the one hand, it's a lot of senseless death and destruction. On the other, without it we don't get The Iliad and The Odyssey - two of the most influential works of literature in western civilization - and Aeneas doesn't go off to Italy (leading to the founding of Rome, which would change the history of western civilization a lot). In the end, they decide to let the war happen but do their best to mitigate the worst parts of it.

And so Percy goes off and becomes a hero of Ancient Greece while pretending to be in a relationship with Apollo.

This stage of things is filed with angst from both parties, as both Percy and Apollo want a real relationship with each other but think they're abusing the other's trust by eagerly faking their relationship. There's a lot of PDA, a lot of feelings, and limited communication. It goes on for quite a while and would probably exasperate quite a few people if everyone in the know didn't think they were already in a relationship.

It's also filled with modern day Percy being confronted by realties of life in Ancient Greece. It's not just mortals knowing about - and interacting with - the gods: it's everything. It's food and clothes and language and culture and housing and travel. He can play a lot off it as being a traveler from the edge of the known world, but some of it has him asking Apollo if he's being rick rolled.

Apollo, meanwhile, is having troubles of his own. He is not the god he used to be and it's hard pretending otherwise. He tries to walk the line of doing enough to be believable and holding back enough not to despise himself, but it's a fine line, he fails often, and he spends a not insignificant amount of time worried he's backsliding.

And so it goes until 7-year-old Helen of Troy is kidnapped by Theseus to be his wife.

This, naturally, does not fly with Percy, who by this time has built up something of a reputation as a hero. He teams up with the Dioscuri to rescue Helen.

One would think this would earn him Zeus' favor. It doesn't. Instead, Zeus sends monsters to harry him for refusing to let Castor and Pollux take Helen's captors' loved ones captive and raze Aphidna for Theseus' crime. Percy manages to hold his own for quite a while but eventually, exhausted from the near-constant fighting, is gored and left for dead by the reformed Minotaur.

...and when Apollo arrives, frantic, to heal him, Percy ascends instead, becoming the greek version of Saint Sebastian - a minor god of heroes, strength in the face of adversity, and athleticism; sort of halfway between Hercules and Chiron.

Then and only then do Percy and Apollo finally get their act together, confessing to each other how much they care for the other and how much they don't want this to be fake any longer.

History proceeds apace - albeit with Persē being a second immortal trainer of heroes.

24 years after their arrival in the past, 16 years after Percy's ascension, The Trojan War begins. Despite their best efforts, there's only so much they can do - war is war and gods are gods. They are able to stop some of the worst excesses on both sides, but in the end Apollo still sends the plague that causes Agamemnon to take Briseis for his own, which caused Achilles' departure from the field, Patroclus' death, &c - not because Apollo was trying to maintain the timeline, but because in the instant he sent it he was angry and reverted to his old ways.

Troy falls...

...but when Zeus tries to use this as an excuse to ban gods from interacting with their demigod children, Apollo is able to say that's a bit extreme isn't it? with enough backing from the rest of the council that Zeus is forced to amend his ruling so that the gods are only allowed to freely visit their children on the "cross quarter days" that fall between each solstice and equinox (1 February, 1 May, 1 August, and 1 November).

This changes everything and nothing.

Time continues its inevitable march. Greece has its golden age before being conquered by Rome, which splits apart under its own weight and forms several smaller countries, which eventually spread their cultures around the world...

Apollo and Percy are there for it all. Persē is a minor figure in mythology, but never forgotten. He is ever-present in Apollo's temples - though the Church will later try to rewrite their myth so that they were merely sworn fighting partners, rather than lovers who eventually had a quite lovely wedding on Olympus (and then, at Poseidon's insistence, an even bigger ceremony on Atlantis). Percy takes over day-to-day operations of CHB from practically the moment the Trojan War ends.

...and so Persē is there the day Sally Jackson tries to get her son to camp, and is able to intervene when the Minotaur attacks on their border. He's able to meet her and her young son, Perseus ("Mom named me after you and the guy that killed Medusa since you're the only two heroes to have happy endings!"), and guide him through the trials that come with being a child of prophecy.

One day that Percy will hand Luke - who was never happy with the limited attention the gods were allowed to give their children - a cursed dagger so that Kronos can be defeated. That child will be offered godhood, turn it down, and go on to have a happy life with his eventual wife, Annabeth. He will never have his memories erased and be sent to Camp Jupiter. Gaia will not rise until long after that Percy's grandchildren are dead, and Zeus will not be quite so bullheaded when the proof of it is brought before him. That Second Gigantomachy is swift, well-coordinated, and fought without another Greek/Roman war brewing in the background.

And when they finally arrive at the day Apollo and Percy were originally sent back in time, Percy admits that while he is happy some version of him was better prepared for the war he was asked to fight in and allowed his peace afterward, he would change nothing about his own life, for it brought him to Apollo. The sunrise the next morning - on the first morning of the rest of their lives - is particularly spectacular.

Bonuses include:

Gaslighting Poseidon into believing that he's met Percy before the first time they're introduced. ("What do you mean you don't remember me, Father? You were present when I came of age! You gifted me this trident! Have I displeased you in some way?") It's an absolute masterclass that eventually manages to convince Poseidon that, yes, of course he knows Percy - and, maybe, he should check in on all his other demigod children to make sure he's not missed someone. (Two. He lost track of two of the others. Maybe he should be more careful about siring children in the future.) Apollo practically has to stuff his fist in his mouth to keep from laughing.

As much historical accuracy as can be crammed into the Percy trying to make sense of Ancient Greece chapters as possible. Think Of a Linear Circle - Part III by flamethrower levels of historical research. As much as can be shoehorned in without bogging down the plot.

Percy and Dionysus bonding over their mutual dislike of Theseus, though Percy generally gets along with his other half-siblings, especially the ones who come to camp young enough to keep from getting big heads over being the children of Poseidon.

Though Percy adores all the children in Cabin 7 (most of whom are born via blessing this time around), he and Apollo have at least one child of their own - maybe a demigod born before Percy's ascension to sell their fake relationship? Maybe a minor god who's later attributed a different parentage by mortals? Dealer's choice on details.

It never being made clear who, or what, or how, Percy and Apollo were sent into the past. All of Percy's oddities are attributed to him being foreign or formerly mortal, all of Apollo's to the fact that he's in love with someone who didn't die before their first anniversary, and no one ever guesses time travel is responsible for their eccentricities. Or that time travel was ever an option.

And that's all I have. As always, feel free to adopt, just link back if you ever decide to do anything with it.

More PJO Ideas | More Terrible Fic Ideas

[thechanelmuse]

How to Get a Menacing Bully to Spiral & Destroy Their Reputation and Brand 😮‍💨

Back in 2021, I reviewed The 48 Laws of Power. One of my favorites. As stated then, it's a well-researched “handbook on the art of indirection” that’s filled with stories and strategies on how societies, groups and individuals throughout history to the present-day have navigated to obtain and/or maintain power. People consider this book to be evil if you're viewing it from a perspective of offense. But if you're an observant and analytical person like myself, you'll simultaneously view it from a perspective of defense on how to protect yourself from someone else's power.

Megan Thee Stallion's "Hiss" to unbothered silence and Nicki Minaj's 3-day unhinged crash out is a perfect 48 Laws of Power moment.

Megan epitomizes Law 4 and Nicki, who's always viewed herself as untouchable, superior to "her sons," and the self-proclaimed Queen of Rap, destroys Law 5.

Law 4: Always Say Less Than Necessary

When you are trying to impress people with words, the more you say, the more common you appear, and the less in control. Even if you are saying something banal, it will seem original if you make it vague, open-ended, and sphinxlike. Powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. The more you say, the more likely you are to say something foolish.

"Power is in many ways a game of appearances, and when you say less than necessary, you inevitably appear greater and more powerful than you are. Your silence will make other people uncomfortable. Humans are machines of interpretation and explanation; they have to know what you are thinking. When you carefully control what you reveal, they cannot pierce your intentions or your meaning.

"Your short answers and silences will put them on the defensive and they will jump in, nervously filling the silence with all kinds of comments that will reveal valuable information about them and their weaknesses. [...] In most areas of life, the less you say, the more profound and mysterious you appear. [...] Once the words are out, you cannot take them back. Keep them under control. The momentary satisfaction you gain with your biting words will be outweighed by the price you pay."

Law 5: So Much Depends On Reputation — Guard It With Your Life

Reputation is the cornerstone of power: through reputation alone you can intimidate and win; once it slips however you are vulnerable and will be attacked on all sides. Make your reputation unassailable. Always be alert to potential attacks and thwart them before they happen. Meanwhile learn to destroy your enemies by opening holes in their own reputations. Then stand aside and let public opinion hang them.

Before I continue with more excerpts from this law, I wanna point out that Nicki's behavior and slander felt like a struggling display of an overt narcissist trying to discard their perceived enemy. People with that condition, lack empathy overall, spiral and lash out to end you emotionally and mentally when you publicly embarrass them and/or privately shut them out when you cause their mask to fall. Manic anger. Just keep that in mind.

More excerpts:

"A solid reputation increases your presence and exaggerates your strengths without your having to spend much energy. It can also create an aura around you that will instill respect, even fear.[...]

"Make your reputation simple and base it on one sterling quality. This single quality — efficiency, say, or seductiveness — becomes a kind of calling card that announces your presence and places others under a spell. [...] Perhaps you have already stained your reputation, so that you are prevented from establishing a new one. In such cases it is wise to associate with with someone whose image counteracts your own, using their good name to whitewash and elevate your own.

"Once [your reputation] is solid, do not let yourself get angry or defensive at the slanderous comments of your enemies—that reveals insecurity, not confidence. Take the high road instead, and never appear desperate in your self-defense.

"You must not seem to engage in petty 😏 vengeance. If you do not break your enemy's reputation cleverly, you will inadvertently ruin your own."

Emotions cloud reason while silence is golden.

Nevermind that Nicki emboldened her cult following of fans to dox Erykah Badu, Victoria Monét, Lil Ju (Megan's producer), the resting place of Megan's mother 🪦, and anyone who verbalized or appeared to be on opposition... There's a whole chapter in this book on cults: Law 27.

Checkmate, Megan.

[queuestarter]

diluted

(johanna mason x reader)

cw: panic attacks, crying, mentions of torture

link to the request → reader helping johanna overcome her fear of water

You eye Johanna critically from across the room. It’s been weeks since she’s been rescued from the Capitol and she’s been completely ignoring you since then. Every time you ask her if she’s okay or if you can do anything for her, she brushes you off.

You understand that she’s been through a lot, but as her girlfriend, her indifference upset you. In an effort to keep yourself busy, you spend most of your time with Beetee in the weapons room, helping to design defensive strategies. Ever since you banned Gale from helping, things have been better on that front.

“Stop looking at me like I’m going to collapse at any moment.” Johanna calls out to you. She’s playing with the sheets on her bed, not even looking in your direction.

You sigh. “I just want you to be okay, Jo. I worry about you.”

She sneers down at her sheets. “Worry about me when Snow’s dead.”

So you do. After Katniss kills President Coin, Snow dies, and the underground community of District 13 falls apart, you move to District 7 and begin to worry about Johanna like it’s a full time job.

It starts with weaning her off of her morphling supply. You two live in the middle of the woods, so there’s no easy access to the drug, nor do you want Johanna using it to cope anymore. It takes her weeks to get back to her healthy self, which brings you great relief.

The other issue that you quickly learn about is Johanna’s newfound fear of water. You quickly piece together that when she was held captive by the Capitol, they used water as a form of torture for her. She doesn’t like talking about it, but you can see the truth in the way her face scrunches up in fear whenever she’s confronted with water. 

It breaks your heart.

You decide to take matters into your own hands once again. You helped her with her morphling withdrawals, you think, how much harder can it be to help her overcome her fear of water?

“Come on, Jo,” you plead with her. “I want to go down to the lake.”

You don’t really want to go to the lake- swimming in freshwater scares you a little bit- but you figure this is a good step one.

Johanna eyes you with a look of disdain on her face. “I don’t want to go. I’m sure there’s a hundred other people in District 7 that would love to join you.”

You grab her hand and kiss her palm. “But there’s no one else in this district that I love like I love you.” You know as soon as you say the words that you’ve sufficiently sweet talked her.

Johanna likes to pretend that she’s tough, but she’s really a giant softy.

Once you actually make it down to the lake, three hours later, Johanna grips your hand with all of her strength, it seems. You take it in stride, though, and hold on just as tight.

“It looks beautiful,” you comment, staring at the water. “Reminds me of you.”

It really does. The way the trees cast a shade upon the surface perfectly complements the highlights from the sun. Just like Johanna, there’s darkness and light.

Johanna rolls her eyes and sets your belongings down on the grass. “Go on, have your fun. I’ll be over here.”

You pout. “Oh. I wanted you to join me.”

The pained look that you’re now so familiar with makes its return. “You know that I don’t want to.”

You instantly melt, wrapping your arms around her. She clings back to you just as tight. “You don’t have to, my love. I just want you to be able to let go of what they did to you. I want you to reclaim it.”

Johanna pulls back and looks into your eyes. “Yeah. You’re right.” And with renewed vigor, Johanna grabs your hand and pulls you to the lake, kicking off her shoes along the way. When she gets to the water’s edge, she stops suddenly.

“What’s wrong, baby?” You ask, letting your own toes dip into the water.

“I don’t know if I can do it,” she says in a soft tone. “I don’t think I can reclaim it.”

You frown, standing in front of her. “Jo, if you don’t want to go in you absolutely don’t have to. It was just a stupid idea.”

Now it’s her turn to frown. “It’s not stupid, you were just trying to help me.” With that, she dips her toes in the lake.

Your jaw drops. You were not expecting her to go in the water that easily. “Baby, you did it!” 

Johanna closes her eyes. “Can we eat lunch now?”

You grin. “Of course.”

After that day, you don’t force her to deal with water so boldly for another few weeks. The next time you bring up the exposure therapy is during a rainstorm that has your girlfriend curled up on the couch holding her ears.

“How about,” you say, rubbing her back. “After this has all cleared up, we do something fun.”

“Like what?” Her voice is muffled by a pillow.

“We can jump in the puddles outside.”

Johanna tenses, more than she already was. “And how is that supposed to be fun?”

You lean down and kiss her nose. “I always used to do that when I was a kid. I liked it. And I feel like it’ll help with what we’ve been working on. You’re scared of this rain, but we’ll have fun playing in the puddles it provides afterwards.”

Johanna looks at you, trust in her eyes. “Okay.”

So that’s what you do.

After the rain ends, it barely takes any coaxing to get Johanna out of the house and bounding into puddles. Once she sees you do it, giggles leaving your lips with each jump, she joins in.

“This isn’t so bad,” she admits, wiping some mud that splashed up on her off of her arms. “It’s kind of nice.”

You nod, grabbing both of her hands. “It is what you make it, baby.”

That’s what you repeat to her when it’s time to get in the shower upon your return home. “It is what you make it, baby. You need to clean off.”

Johanna shakes her head. “I can’t. This is too much.” It breaks your heart to see tears flowing freely from her eyes.

“I’ll be there with you the entire time. Holding you, kissing you. This is just going to be another good memory,” you try to convince her.

Without wasting another moment, you strip out of your filthy clothes and throw them in the hamper. You then turn on the shower, heart panging at the sound of another one of Johanna’s sobs.

You turn back to your girlfriend, helping her strip as well. You pepper kisses all over her cheeks and lips, hands running over her back. “Let’s wash off, baby. It’ll be quick.”

You step into the shower, just standing under the stream. You think that maybe if she sees that you’re okay under the flow of water, she will be too.

That hope doesn’t last long- Johanna just stands and watches you with tears in her eyes, hands twisting together.

“Come on,” you plead. “You can’t stay covered in mud forever. And I’m lonely in here. I need you with me, always.”

That seems to do it. Johanna takes a step forward, then another, and then eventually she collapses in your arms, sobs wracking her body.

“That’s my girl,” you say, petting her hair. “I’ve never been so proud of you in my life.” You continue to repeat positive affirmations to her, holding her close to you.

After a few minutes, Johanna is calm enough to agree to you washing her body. You take your time, scrubbing her from top to bottom. She even jokes around with you towards the end while you quickly wash yourself off.

Hours later, wrapped up in your matching robes on your bed, she thanks you. “I never would have done that without you. Thank you, baby.” It’s so uncharacteristic for her to say, even more so when she tucks her head in your neck.

You love that she feels safe enough with you to be soft.

“There’s no need to thank me. I just want you to be the happiest you can be. This is the start of the rest of our life, baby. I don’t want the past to hold us back.”

She nods, kissing your collarbone. A few moments later, she’s asleep. 

You fall asleep shortly after her, a smile on your face.

-

[shituationist]

the drexler-smalley debate on nanotechnology is interesting to me. it's also interesting that it's largely forgotten. young people today are mostly unaware of what kind of hype nanotechnology had going for it in the early 2000s, which has now all but died down. there was a point where singularitarians were worried about the possibility of "grey goo" taking over the earth before "AGI" did. nowadays it's rare to hear them talk about nanotechnology at all.

drexler was the nanotechnology hype man. to a lesser degree, so was smalley. both believed in the potential for nanotechnology to address human problems, but drexler was the "grey goo" guy who believed in nano-scale mechanical synthesis of arbitrary molecular compounds. smalley on the other hand viewed nanotechnology as essentially a specialized branch of chemistry, and believed that nanotechnology would have to - to put it bluntly - obey the laws of nature that govern normal chemical synthesis.

smalley's contribution was criticized for relying on metaphor, but this isn't really the case. smalley tries to get drexler to step away from science fiction and towards how chemical interactions really work. drexler's case is more defensive and much weaker than his own advocates let on. smalley argues that if you want to do chemical synthesis, you can't break physical laws to do it. he tries to demonstrate why hypothetical nano-scale mechanical "fingers" would fail to synthesize chemicals in the desired fashion, limiting what kinds of materials can be fabricated.

drexler rejects that hypothetical machinery and then shifts the terms of the debate back to relatively ordinary bio-chemistry. both mention ribosomes, which produce enzymes, as prototypical "molecular assemblers". smalley is pleased by their convergence on this point. he tries to drive home his point further about the limitations of what hypothetical engineered ribosomes could produce, and how the vision of self-assembling nanobots is unrealistic given the way natural "molecular assemblers" really work. but drexler shifts the focus again back to the mechano-synthesis of his dreams/nightmares, envisioning molecular assemblers as a nano-scale factory floor complete with conveyor belts and a kind of mechanical smushing together of molecules, analogous to macro-level manufacturing processes.

smalley wasn't having it. his concluding letter begins with: "I see you have now walked out of the room where I had led you to talk about real chemistry, and you are now back in your mechanical world. I am sorry we have ended up like this. For a moment I thought we were making progress." you can hear the disappointment in his tone.

and it got worse: "You are still in a pretend world where atoms go where you want because your computer program directs them to go there. You assume there is a way a robotic manipulator arm can do that in a vacuum, and somehow we will work out a way to have this whole thing actually be able to make another copy of itself. I have given you reasons why such an assembler cannot be built, and will not operate, using the principles you suggest. I consider that your failure to provide a working strategy indicates that you implicitly concur--even as you explicitly deny--that the idea cannot work."

smalley then goes on to talk about how drexler's idea of "grey goo" has scared children who are interested in science and how he should be ashamed of himself. at that point he's just rubbing it in. but the debate ends there, too. smalley dies a few years later. drexler, for his part, seems to have given up on the "grey goo" idea when the funding for nanotechnology research started to dry up. he's an "AI" risk guy nowadays, collecting consulting fees for "AI safety" types of things. in retrospect, it seems like smalley was right. the direction of nanotechnology research went towards practical chemistry inspired by ribosomes and enzymes and limited by the physical qualities of those systems, the kinds of limitations smalley describes. drexler's "self-assembling nanobots" are nowadays regarded as a kind of science fiction by eminent researchers in the field. smalley's key points, that there are limitations to what biological "molecular assemblers" can produce and the constraints on how they can be produced, have withstood a couple decades of scientific research.

[thelaughtercafe]

Coping With Hope

Tea Type: Half and Half (Fluff and Hurt/Comfort)

Potential Triggers: No twording in this fic! This whole fic centers around creating coping strategies for issues with eating, and that negative voice in one’s head! Hope this helps someone else going through this too! ❤

Pairing: Bakugou/Reader towards the end, but other characters include Todoroki, Izuku, Ochaco, Mina, Kaminari, Kirishima, and Shinsou!

Length: 1.3k+

Summary: You're so thankful for your friends, and they help you brainstorm strategies to help you with your issues.

A/N: Oh would you look at that? A follow up because I have no self control 🙃 This is more of a part 2 than anything to finish off the night so no twording yet! Next fic is where twording'll be more prominent. It physically killed me not to include Monoma in part 1 because if felt he didn’t fit the dynamic so there will definitely be a Shinsou/Reader/Monoma fic at some point.

“So. Now that we’ve established the issue; how do you want us to help?”

Todoroki sat across from you with you up by the pillow and the others all circled around you; crammed on top of Bakugou’s bed. 

You were still catching your breath a little, having suddenly been attacked by wiggling fingers and teasing for a solid 10 minutes. It had been overwhelming, but in the best way possible. No doubt Bakugou knew you needed a moment to not think which is the real reason he outed you. 

Cheeks still a little pink, the negative voice seemed too tickled out to have anything to say for once, apparently tuckered out. 

“Well…”

You nibbled your bottom lip, trying to think. 

“Maybe you guys can remind me to eat, gently?”

You fidgeted uncomfortably, shyly playing with your fingers. 

“If you ask me directly I may get defensive or anxious; the only one of you I’d say who could effectively get through to me like that is Bakugou, and Todoroki.”

“Me and Bakugou?”

Todoroki seemed surprised and almost offended and you hid a smile behind your hand as you nodded. 

“Yeah. See, Bakugou is gonna be the type to shove a cereal bar in my hand and if I try to protest he’s just gonna make me shut up before I spiral. He’ll have me eating before I have time to think about it. Whereas I could see you also giving me small snacks and such, but you have a much subtler way about you of…hm…how do I explain? Like making me go quiet and shy and just doing as asked? I guess intimidated is the right word but good intimidated if that makes sense?”

He snickered under his breath at that, making you look up as you blushed. He reached over and patted your head, affectionately.

“Uh-huh. I get what you mean cutie. That’s fine.”

You tried to move on to cope with your face burning and nodded. 

“Th-thanks! Okay um…also not treating me like different? I don’t mind subtle gestures and well-" 

You started shyly fidgeting again, eyes flicking to the mattress as you swallowed shyly. 

"Affection and physical contact could be a good way to help condition and reward me I think. I kinda forgot how touch starved I was till confronted with it and then I realized how nice it is so-but if that’s weird don’t-”

“Oh we are on it!!”

You giggled as Kaminari near tackled you before cuddling up to your side and nuzzling into your neck. tickling you slightly as you squirmed before giving up and leaning against him. Okay, admittedly that felt really nice. 

“Hey save some for us Nari no fair!!”

Uraraka pouted and made grabby hands at you as Shinsou began carding his fingers through your hair again quietly, making you melt all the more into the boy behind you.  

Bakugou snorted. 

“You really do remind me of a cat sometimes you know that? Gonna start calling you kitten.”

Your eyes popped open at that as you blushed. 

“Don’t you dare hotshot. I can think of much worse nicknames given time.”

He leered at you playfully. 

“I’m not too worried kitten~ guess you’ll have to get used to it.”

You rolled your eyes but hummed as you tried to think. Was there really anything else?

“What about when you spiral?”

Deku’s voice was kind but concerned and you stiffened a little against Kaminari before shaking your head at him. 

“Trust me; you don’t want to hear what the voice in my head shouts at me. I deal better with spirals alone. Better I break down alone, cope with it and then move on.”

He frowned at that. 

“But… you have us now. Don’t you want us to help ground you and remind you it’s not true? Kachaan used to help me with my anxiety attacks by doing that.”

You bit your lip, hesitantly but nodded. 

“I mean…I can try it. But no promises I won’t run away or something when I get overwhelmed. I get scared of having my emotions negatively affect you guys.”

“Well we’re still here and fine aren’t we?”

Kirishima piped up with a smile that made you relax again with a nod, as Izuku continued.

“Well it should definitely be an intimate group then so you don’t feel too overwhelmed. Me, and either Kirishima or Bakugou depending on who’s available…is there anyone else you think who would help?”

“If she’s not around you guys, Monoma and I can handle it.”

Shinsou spoke suddenly making you turn to angle your head towards him. 

“Are you sure?”

You knew Shinsou also struggled with spirals so you didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. 

He nodded, determination clear in his eyes. 

“Mm. Yeah. And I’m sure Monoma will want to help too. He’s surprisingly good at calming people down. Who would’ve guessed him never shutting up could be useful, right?”

An amused smirk tugged at his lips that you mirrored and you nodded. 

“Okay then.”

“Ooh, ooh what about me?”

Ashido raised her hand and bounced in place a little, a grin evident as she looked eager. 

“I’m honestly kind of at a loss for more ideas-”

“Oh I got one!”

Kaminari leaned his head on your shoulder, his arms wrapped comfortably around your middle as he grinned at Ashido. 

“You like to cook right? Why don’t you make her lunches?”

You waved your hands quickly in denial at that. 

“Wha-? No no that’s okay!! I don’t want to waste ingredients or what if I can’t eat it all that day or-”

Shinsou’s utterance of your name made you freeze again and once you’d met his gaze he gave you an amused smile. 

“Breathe.”

You did so as Ashido smiled gently and put your worries at ease.

“Well I always buy too much anyway honestly. I make Kaminari’s, Jirou’s and occasionally Todoroki’s too on top of my own so if anything you’ll be helping me out! As for if you’re having trouble eating it all… I’m sure one of the boys will be ecstatic over extra food; so that way you don’t have to feel bad if it gets too hard! Sound good? Oh!”

She laughed in surprise as you hopped across the bed out of Kami’s grip who whined at the loss to hug her in answer, rubbing your back. 

At your mumbled thanks she hummed in acknowledgement. 

When you finally sat back, looking misty eyed and nervous as you glanced towards Bakugou the others knew it was time to go and began making their way out over the next several minutes as you got up to wish them well and thank them for being such great friends. 

Eventually, only Bakugou and you remained, peaceful silence between you two as you tiredly leaned against his shoulder, both of your backs against the pillows as you rested. 

Eventually, after a while, you spoke up quietly. 

“…Is it bad that I’m scared? Now that everyone knows I just…I’m worried I’ll let them down.”

You felt rather than heard him sigh and he moved to wrap the arm you’d been leaning against around your shoulders, his other hand supporting his head as he looked at the ceiling in contemplation and then answered. 

“I think…it’s perfectly normal to be afraid. Even All Might has fear, ya know? But as long as we make an effort every day to fight against that fear. Then I think we’ll also be a little better every day. That’s how I choose to think of it anyway.”

A genuine smile had bloomed across your face at that and you sighed into his neck, the elevated warmth his body provided immensely comforting and disarming.

“You’re gonna make such an amazing hero one day Bakugou. You’re already one person’s. I’m so lucky you found me.”

Your eyed had slipped shut so you missed the way his cheeks flamed though his eyes filled with pride, his grip tightening just enough to make you feel completely protective. The peck to the top of your head was quick but lingered enough to ensure you felt it. 

If you hadn’t already been starting to drift into dreamland, you surely would’ve noticed the thickness in your best friend’s voice as he murmured. 

“Go to bed, kitten. You’ve had a long day today.”

If only you knew you weren’t the only one who felt saved. 

[systemadministratorclu]

🌌- Their alternate universe self

A portal opens in front of Milo and Lyle and out falls canon Rourke. The portal closes behind him, he's in the middle of nowhere with these two.

All three men are, understandably, very confused, each for his own reason.

For Milo, it's because there are now two Rourkes, though it's easy to tell them apart, seeing as only one wears an Atlantean crystal and has a Heart of Atlantis tattoo that covers his entire right shoulder. And only one looks at him with warm, loving eyes. The other has a gaze that chills Milo to his very core. There is nothing but hate in those cold, dark eyes that look at him like a wolf waiting to devour its helpless prey.

For Lyle, it is the instant recognition of who the stranger is. Or at least the recognition that it's some other version of him. This of course leads him to wonder where this version came from and why he's here. Neither he nor Milo asks how the man ended up here, they both have a feeling they know. Lyle feels the hairs on his neck stand up as he looks at the other him. There's a sense of coldness, of ice to him, and Lyle doesn't like the way this creep is looking at Milo like a piece of meat.

Surprisingly, it is the stranger whose confusion is gone first. Of course he wondered where he was and how he got here, and why there was a copy of him here. But those thoughts have been pushed aside for the moment. Because he has acquired a target. His sight seems to laser focus on the one who stands in his way. The one who ruined his plans AND escaped his wrath. Not this time, Mr. Thatch, he thinks, his body coiling up like a cobra preparing to attack.

And then, like lightning, he strikes.

Milo has no time to even blink as the immense weight slams him to the ground, driving the wind from him. He's barely noticed that when the barrage of fists begins and doesn't stop. He manages to regain enough of his breath to cry out in pain, both from the blows and the enormous weight crushing him into the ground. He can't see, and he's not sure if he's lost his glasses or if he's just disoriented from the merciless assault on his face. Ordinarily, Milo is a good fighter, he has even beaten Lyle in some of their training bouts. But this man is nothing like Lyle, despite looking like him. Milo realizes this....this berserker Rourke...isn't looking for a fight. He's hellbent on a kill. And Milo's mind is unable to make his body even begin to try and find an escape or a defense fast enough.

Milo is scared now. He's going to die.

The stranger has a mad, almost giddy look in his eyes, even as he pummels his helpless victim into the ground. He sees blood but it's not his so it only encourages him. He wants to draw more of it. He is so focused on his mission to kill Milo, he has made one grave error. He has forgotten about his other self.

Lyle is just as shocked as Milo. But he quickly becomes as focused as the stranger. Suddenly, he no longer gives a rat's hairy ass who the stranger is or why he's here. Lyle cares only about one thing.

The stranger hurt Milo. Is still hurting him. And Lyle knows Milo's skill enough to realize Milo isn't fighting back....because he can't. Milo's cry of pain is like a starter gun going off for a runner, and Lyle strikes just as fast as his counterpart.

"GET THE FUCK OFF HIM!!" He roars as he throws the stranger back, away from Milo. Lyle then puts himself between the two. He fights everything within him that wants to just run to Milo's side. He can't. Not until the threat to Milo is gone. Not until he ensures that Milo is safe from further harm. He does steal a glance at Milo and sees him just lay there, not moving, and now he wants even more to run to Milo's side. Instead, he uses that desire to fuel his fight as he rounds on the stranger.

He doesn't worry about techniques or strategy or anything else. He just wants this fight over as quickly as possible. And just as the stranger did to Milo, Lyle now does to him. Fists and feet fly in a never-ending torrent of motion. It's all a blur to Lyle, until finally, he somehow knocks the other him unconscious, and it's clear the newcomer won't be getting up for a while.

Lyle then gives in to his desire, running over and dropping to his knees.

"Ohh Milo." He gasps at the injuries as tears spring to his eyes and he sweeps Milo into his arms and just holds him for a moment, telling him he's safe now as he checks the rest of Milo's body to see if he's hurt anywhere besides his face, where he definitely has a broken nose and probably other bones, too. It's too serious for him to just heal it with his crystal, though he does use that on any cuts or scrapes he sees, so they don't get infected. The rest, unfortunately, will require actual medical help. For now, Lyle just gently dries Milo's tears as he heals some more cuts. Milo just whimpers softly in pain.

"It's alright, Mi, you'll be okay. You're gonna be okay." He puts Milo's glasses back in place as best he can, then gently brushes Milo's hair back and gives him a soft kiss on his forehead.

Milo sucks in an enormous breath as the crazed beast is pulled off him. He hears Lyle's voice, then the sounds of the two fighting.....he's barely conscious and everything hurts so much. Then Lyle is there beside him, now he's in Lyle's arms. He winces because everything hurts, even at Lyle's soft touch. He knows Lyle is trying hard not to hurt him more or cause him any more pain. But the backs of his shoulders were scraped up by the ground where he'd been slammed into it (his tank top appears to have spared the rest of his back, but these wounds still look more serious than Lyle feels comfortable trying to heal with the crystal). Lyle sets him down only so he can take off his own tank top, roll it up, and slip it inside the straps of Milo's so it covers the backs of his shoulders. It's not going to help the wounds much, but it might spare Milo even a little pain from having the area touched as Lyle stands up with Milo cradled against his chest. He looks back at the spatters of Milo's blood on the ground and his unconscious other self, but doesn't really care. Sure he probably could've finished him off for good, but Lyle is not a murderer and to him it's more important he gets Milo to safety and gets him help for his injuries. He does utter a curse in Atlantean before he stalks off, holding Milo close, telling him he loves him, among other words of comfort, as he carries Milo away from the scene of the fight.

//this got way longer than I thought it would. Sorry not sorry!!//

[csyched]

Since some people seem to like my QDS rambles i think i will keep going… :>

Did you know i really love QDS Gale? And I will tell you everything I love about how he was written and how I have analyzed him after being into QDS for over a year. Mind you, spoilers for volumes 1+2, though it's only regarding Gale himself and nothing else, and I try to keep the big moments vague. Also, this is a long post.

First off, I think Yu Godai does a fantastic job writing her own interpretation of Gale. Since he wasn’t an original character of hers, he’s quite different in the novel series, yet I would argue that his character arc is written better and of course, more stretched out than it is in DDS. There is more of a slow-burn in terms of his development, and even if you can’t read the later volumes apart from the summaries available (I had to machine translate the entirety of vol. 5 lmao), you still can see how he changes throughout the series, and it’s really nice to see it through.

In QDS, rather than having an instant awakening, Gale has to grapple with difficult emotions like anxiety and frustration a bit more slowly as things in his environment begin to change. Another different component is that because of changing conditions of the world, he is denied of his role by Serph and is stuck back at base for many missions, hence his developing frustration. Thus, he starts to question his worth within the Junkyard, and because of the "thought conditioning" that he and all other bishops in the Junkyard were put through, it’s even more difficult for him to try and rationalize these unfamiliar emotions. (At one point, he even tries to run an internal diagnostic check because he's so confused about what he is feeling). For him, someone who has been born to act as an obedient machine, emotions are unnecessary and an obstacle in his job. Additionally, it's clear the sudden change is something he is not designed to handle. This leads to him repressing his feelings as a defense mechanism. It ends up protecting him as intended later on (ooh does that part get interesting by the way!), but it leaves him struggling to connect to the people around him. Most people brush him off as cold and uncaring with his nature of relying on logic for strategy.

Clearly though, Gale does care, and he is self-aware. He just has no idea how to express it all.

Gradually, Gale does begin to break, starting with the unease he feels with his unfulfilling role. He isn't allowed to fight alongside his comrades, nor do normal bishop duties (everything in the Junkyard is breaking), and he's essentially being grounded like a child, his ideas very often dismissed. With the weight of this and confusing, contradicting orders from his leader, we get to see Gale crack under all of this pressure. There is an expectation for him to be a bishop and listen to orders obediently, but to also change and adapt and understand everything like everyone else, including complex emotions. It’s a ridiculous expectation, of course, which leads me to a bit of an off-tangent point.

As an autistic person, reading and focusing on Gale’s perspective felt… painfully familiar. Sure, there are obvious things like his monotone voice and low variety in facial expression, things I also have. There’s also his hypersensitivity, something he is equipped with due to being a bishop. Additionally, there is a certain level of infantilization I think he is treated with, made more noticeable by the fact that he is the oldest in the Embryon. But something I also recognized as relatable was that inherent and instant expectation for Gale to quickly grasp the intentions of others and the nuances of their emotions and perspectives. In response, Gale begins to develop an ability to predict how people will react (e.g., he develops a tactical plan according to how he thinks Serph will like it and will respond to the current situation, his commanding style being of slight irrationality and emotional “hunches” that Gale doesn’t understand, but tries to) and he really does try to empathize with his comrades out of his own concern... it's just hard. And he isn't given much patience with it, clearly.

Additionally, he misses “obvious” social cues, yet is hyper-vigilant, or very self-aware in how he talks to people, to the point of fearing rejection or punishment. For example, he:

Thinks he's in trouble and being detained when Sera holds his hands when he goes unconscious, and is then assumed to be ungrateful

Misses sarcastic jokes by Cielo

Provides prolonged explanations that are usually unprompted, at least not to be in such high detail

Immediately assumes punishment from Serph when failing a certain responsibility he was given

I believe these are things that some, or many autistic people have experienced in their life. For me, I was recently diagnosed as an adult, and understanding the way I interact with others is eye-opening, yet frustrating and painful since it’s taken so many years of utter confusion to get here. Many of us grow up with a distinct feeling of "what is wrong with me?". I believe that Gale truly deserved some grace, but nothing ever goes well in QDS, sadly. I can promise you however, that Gale gets to learn and grow a lot in the series.

And if you want to know more about Gale in QDS, I'd be happy to share more. These novels deserve a lot more spotlight.

[monitorkernelaccess]

I think it probably is more likely that Falin chimera was purposely trying to disarm Laios by crying for help, rather than that part actually being genuine. Cause it happens at a moment when she’s temporarily disarmed from being electrocuted and then she does make a smug face afterwards. But I’m sentimental and I Want To Believe

Uhh it could also maybe be both? Like both an intentional tactic (from the dragon side?) and also a sign that at least some part of Falin is in there and wants to be saved

The way they animate it, her eyes go from dragon-like slitted pupils to normal round pupils as she says it. And then a tear falls from one eye, while the other eye stays completely dry

Looking at all that again with a bit more context and possibly a clearer mind, that looks like it’s all to make the ruse look more realistic. If it were more of an outburst as I originally believed (or was trying to convince myself), then the pupils wouldn’t have changed probably? It seems like an intentional move

In addition to the pupil change, the single tear seems forced as well. Like she could only muster up one fake tear while the other eye remained completely dry.

On the other hand…it’s kinda hard to force tears at all, especially so quickly. And if we imagine for the moment that the tear was genuine, could the fact that it only fell from one eye mean that only half of her was crying? Like maybe the dragon is really mostly in control, but it let Falin out as an emotional manipulation tactic. Meaning that the cry was both genuine and just a combat strategy/self-defense measure.

And I’m still not sure what to make of the fact that she pushes Laios out of the way before crushing Kabru. Like was it just an accident then? Or is it more just a side effect of Laios being essentially the main character and no one in the main party gets killed in that scene? Or…could it still be that maybe, deep down, Falin doesn’t want to hurt her brother?

[mmriesoftvat]

CHARACTER ANALYSIS: WANDERER VS CYNO.

i've talked extensively to people about my thoughts on this, so i'm going to preface this entire post with my OPINION that wanderer is playing around during this fight. he's incredibly strong and has hundreds of years of fighting experience over the other contestants. he was ordered to keep an eye on them, not to actually harm them. THAT SAID, "playing around" also doesn't mean not doing anything. he's clearly still fighting, but i think the difference is that he's enjoying himself more than he anticipated. and of course, there are contestants that brought him a decent enough challenge and even tested his skills. but ULTIMATELY wanderer was not throwing his full strength into the ring. he was taking it easy and holding himself back. please don't come at me.

that said, let's get on with it!

here we have our first screenshot. he's not touching layla, he merely is taking the diadem from her. it's a huge blink and you'll miss it moment, and i had to slow the video way down to capture this shot because of how fast he's moving. had he been more serious, wanderer would have at least done something more. this is the first hint we see that he's holding back/taking things semi easily. he's just taking it and going.

i really love this shot of her confusion. layla has no idea wtf just happened. wanderer is a zoomy boy, okay? very "hi bye!". i love it. she's heckin confused, probably didn't even see him.

oh but faruzan definitely saw him. now she's mad. it had just been between her and layla, and now EVERYONE'S there, all fighting for the diadem. competition just got more high stakes for her. go faruzan, get your crown.

THIS was the first moment i realized wanderer wasn't being serious. if he were actually competing, he probably wouldn't have slowed down/stopped to stare at faruzan. everyone else was in it to win. he's just holding out the diadem and. dare i say, even taunting her? hat guy you silly billy.

bonus dialog after he stole the diadem right out from layla's arms. again, zoomy and zippy boy.

look at he go.

this is the first time he's being targeted. notice how he's not attacking her back. he's attacking her device in self defense.

self. defense. though, i will admit that he does throw out some half assed blades later on, but for now, he's protecting himself.

so far, yet again, he's moving in self defense. i don't know for sure if he knew the others were laying in wait and purposely flew toward them. i feel like tighnari definitely planned on hitting him, but wanderer is flying at the moment, and is still moving fast. quick reflexes though, i'm impressed. wish i could be like that.

this is his expression to cyno's weapon being thrown in his direction. to me it looks focused, like he's thinking on the spot and less "i'm going to demolish this guy." wanderer is actively thinking while moving. either for strategy or to dodge, but i love the tiny detail in that his gaze is focused right on that staff, and he looked very in the zone. and of course in the next shot, he uses his own abilities to knock the staff away.

now cyno, on the other hand. cyno is also very focused. he's definitely not playing around. that expression, what little we can see of his eye, very much screams "i'm going to pummel you into the ground." he wants that card. he's here for the win and he's going to take it.

the fact he lands and immediately starts running tells me he's NOT going to hold back. he's throwing his all into this. i love the contrast between him and wanderer. wanderer seems more focused/thinking on the spot on how not to hurt them. whereas cyno is looking to win and wanderer is someone he can target. especially considering wanderer is still holding the diadem. to me it also is very telling how low to the ground cyno is. he's still hunched forward, that guy has speed on his side and he's using every bit of it to get to wanderer.

here is wanderer, readying himself to attack cyno. and again i say he's holding back. because in the next shot-

he's landing on cyno's staff.

i've already talked about and reblogged recently a previous post where i went into detail over how strong wanderer is. if he really wanted to, that staff would not have stopped him from kicking cyno's face. we know cyno is strong, he's incredibly strong. but wanderer is also hyper strong and can do things that i don't think cyno can. plus, it looks like, to me at least, that he didn't even aim for cyno's face. the staff came up to block cyno, and wanderer immediately landed on it. there are a lot of things he could have done to take cyno out, but DIDN'T. every time i think about this entire cutscene, this moment right here is the biggest giveaway that wanderer's not being wholly serious. he landed on the staff and stared down cyno, and then jumped off. cyno may be taking this fight serious, but wanderer is holding back.

wanderer DOES throw out an attack, but i feel like it's him knowing that cyno's also fast as hell and can dodge easily. going back to the beginning, he didn't hurt layla or faruzan because he didn't want to hurt them. since cyno's also very strong, i'm pretty sure wanderer was comfortable enough to throw something out, knowing cyno could handle it. in that same vein, i don't think he got that chance with tighnari earlier, because he was too busy dodging all those arrows. i digress.

wanderer attacked because he knew cyno could easily dodge.

like so. cyno's able to block the attack because cyno is a very skilled fighter. not that none of the other contestants aren't skilled, but wanderer also just stopped to stare at faruzan rather than attack her. he had every opportunity to throw his anemo at her and layla, but he's only doing it with cyno. probably because cyno is also very fast and quick on the reflexes. still, it's a cool scene, it's my favorite cutscene in the entire game.

i mean, look at the way cyno's sliding to dodge. guy's practically doing the splits. but no, more seriously, look at the expression on his face. he's just as focused and determined, though i still think they're both focused and determined for different reasons. like i said earlier, cyno wants that card, wanderer just wants to do his job and make it out without anyone getting seriously hurt.

again, wanderer being really fast and dodging cyno's attacks. he's still throwing out his anemo, but he also flies around to make sure cyno's paying attention first before attacking again.

it's hard to see since even with the video playing really slowly this is what i'm able to get. but cyno was able to block the attack. the fact that wanderer waited until he could tells me he was holding back. were he more serious, he wouldn't have waited. at least, i don't think.

cyno is running so fast here it looks like he's gliding. maybe wanderer is a little more serious at this point. here is an opponent who can match him in speed at the VERY least, if not strength. i would even wager to say he's impressed. he's used to being the lone wanderer, hating the world around him and belittling everyone for being weaker than him. but here comes cyno who can match him in terms of speed and agility. who WOULDN'T be impressed by that? so maybe wanderer is a little more serious about who he's up against, especially considering they've been fighting each other more than anyone else in the competition fought each other. in this last round, at least. doesn't mean overall wanderer is completely serious over the whole competition.

another act of self defense. though i think in this case he didn't exactly have a choice. cyno caught him off guard. wanderer didn't have time to dodge or launch a counter attack -- cyno was too quick for him. no choice but to block the attack.

i feel like in this moment, it looks like wanderer wants to keep fighting cyno. the stare down is really intense, and it's intimidating when you see that cyno's surrounded by electro. the guy is ready to destroy something. i feel like, at least for the briefest of seconds, they both forgot about the competition and were more interested in fighting each other. but kaveh was attached to faruzan's device and flying in really fast.

bonus, i love that layla and faruzan have just been. standing around the whole time. i don't know where tighnari went. probably looking for another angle to shoot wanderer with.

just because wanderer is distracted by a flying kaveh, doesn't mean cyno is. more proof that wanderer isn't completely serious. why else would he turn his back on an opponent? cyno's not distracted, he's gonna get that diadem and win. he's so determined.

kaveh isn't even a threat. he's flying right by everything, probably too panicked and confused to let go of faruzan's device. but wanderer is reaching out anyway to spin him around. which, to me is the whole point: he may have had some enjoyment and flying around, but ultimately, the diadem was not his to take and the competition wasn't his to win. cause if he wanted to win or cared at all, he would've just taken the diadem to the podium himself. which wasn't what he was ordered to do but that's beside the point. the entire fight was nothing more than idle time wasted (and some unspoken bonding with cyno, i'm convinced of it.)

he's actively spinning kaveh around, though i think the device kaveh is still holding is helping. i don't think wanderer really intended to hurt anyone, he's just moving them around, toying with all of them.

cyno's still coming for the diadem. he wants it. but wanderer purposely holds it out. maybe he planned for it? because cyno succeeds in knocking it out of wanderer's hands. it goes flying up, leaving it open for kaveh to use his toolbox to grab it.

which of course, the force sent kaveh tumbling head over heels right to the podium. had wanderer not grabbed him and redirected him, wouldn't have happened.

the rest of the scene is kaveh basically winning the competition. but my ultimate conclusion is that wanderer was holding back. he didn't start attacking the other contestants until cyno came along, because cyno is just as terrifying as he is. i feel like wanderer enjoyed the fight, and would have continued had kaveh not shown up with the device, which provided a perfect opportunity for wanderer to redirect him and send him flying to the finish line.

wanderer was in the competition because of orders, and didn't NEED to fight. he could have continued to toy with everyone, but cyno brought out a different kind of focus in him. i'd like to think he enjoyed that fight, but he was definitely holding back. there were moments where wanderer could have kicked cyno in the face or launched him, but he didn't. and the only reason he attacked was in part because he knew cyno could dodge, and in part because he was keeping cyno distracted long enough for kaveh to come flying in.

it's another testiment to wanderer's strength and even character development. it's one of the reasons he's my favorite character, because while he's still the loner and an asshole at times, he does show his respect toward people in his own way.

[therealgchu]

Spooky Action at a Distance - Chapter 2

is up!

i think i just really like messed up, dysfunctional ppl.

Chapter 2 is now live over on ao3.

next week, the first chapter in a new Anamnesis series called The Pilot will be published Friday.

my other stuff on ao3.

it takes two to tango

“Sam,” she started, then paused, “do you still go by Sam?” she asked, looking away. It was easier to talk to him if she didn’t have to look at him.

“Still Sam, at least to people who know my name,” he answered, “which aren’t that many.”

“Sam,” she began again, still not making eye contact, “I’m not sure what you’re expecting…” she started.

“I’m not expecting anything,” he blurted, taking a step towards her. “I just wanted to…talk. I guess.” He looked chagrined, “I’m kinda flying by the seat of my pants here,” he said nervously, hoping that she might throw him a lifeline. Even when she wasn’t looking at him, she made him nervous.

She took a step back in reaction to his step towards her, and let out an exasperated sigh, “When don’t you?”

“I thought after several lifetimes I had outgrown that. But, then I saw you, and everything seemed to go out the window,” he answered. “I want to….I wanted to….how are you doing?” he ended lamely. Her impassive mien and lack of eye contact was making it hard to find the words to put her at ease. Which was ridiculous since he wasn’t at ease, either.

Min brushed her hair out of her eyes. “I killed Delgado and took over the Crimson Fleet,” she said after a moment. “I’m the queen of the pirates now,” she said cynically, the only real emotion she’d shown the whole time.

He stared at her, mouth agape.

“Makes it easier to get all of the artifacts when I have a personal army at my beck and call. Aren’t I the type of Starborn that you go after to keep from getting to the Unity?” she asked, finally making eye contact with him. “Aren’t you supposed to stop me? I’m unworthy,” the self-loathing was dripping from every word.

“Min…I…” Sam started, but she interrupted him.

“Just let me gather the artifacts and I’ll be out of your universe and you’ll never see me again,” she said and looked away.

“You don’t want me to help you fight the Hunter?” he asked lamely. He didn’t know how to respond to her statement about Delgado. She wasn’t wrong about his raison d’etre as The Emissary, but as Sam, he didn’t think he could move against her. She may not be his late wife, but she was similar enough that it hurt. It was obvious that whatever happened since he saw her last changed her, and just like his wife, he wanted to help her. He couldn’t help himself.

Min snorted, “I’ve never needed your help fighting. Unless you’re radically different than my Sam, I never needed help to fight anything,” she said. She knew she was being cruel, but it was also the truth. But, he was the one that invaded her space, that made her feel emotions that she thought she killed years ago. Just like her Sam, he could get past her walls and defenses without even trying. It pissed her off. “I was always a far better shot, more disciplined, better at tactics and strategy,” she tallied off on her fingers.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” he replied despondently. He didn’t need her to remind him of his shortcomings.

“Then why are you here?” she asked again, this time annoyance edging her voice. “And I know it’s not to make small talk or to catch up.”

“I don’t know,” he answered. “I don’t know what I was thinking.” He looked at her with a pained expression and shook his head. “I should go,” he whispered.

“Yeah,” Min said simply.

[rexsilvae]

well chat heres the self proclaimed gay ass story

The two of them sat in the royal bathhouse, steam curling around them as Stagros, his voice low and intense, described the distant conflict. 'The frontlines are shifting rapidly,' he said, his fingers tapping the stone bench. 'They’ve established a strong defensive perimeter along the river, but the enemy’s using guerrilla tactics, disrupting supply lines. Our forces are spread thin, caught in a brutal war of attrition. It’s not just the battles; the sieges have been relentless, and morale is beginning to crack

Arbor raised an eyebrow, his expression bemused. 'Is the god of War worried?' he asked, his tone both curious and mocking. 'Aren’t you the one who’s always ready to plunge into the fray, Stagros? You’ve seen bloodshed and chaos, yet now you speak of morale cracking?

Stagros let out a short, bitter laugh, his eyes narrowing as he leaned back against the warm stone wall. "It's not about fear, Arbor. It’s about the cost. Battles can be won, but at what price? The longer this drags on, the more we lose—not just men, but the will to fight. The frontlines are slipping from our grasp, and now even the generals are pulling back, uncertain of the next move."

Arbor studied him, his eyes softening. "And yet, you remain steadfast. Why? What’s keeping you in the fight, Stagros?"

Stagros shifted, his gaze locking with Arbor’s for a moment longer than necessary. "Because I have to." His voice dropped, the words laced with something more than military strategy. "Someone has to hold the line, Arbor. If I falter, who will protect the ones who follow?"

Arbor’s lips parted, as if he wanted to say something, but the words hung in the air, suspended by the tension between them. He waved his hand "You always talk of protecting others, Stagros, but what about yourself? Who will hold the line for you?"

Stagros stiffened at Arbor’s words, his breath catching for a brief moment. He turned his head slightly, "I’ve never needed anyone to hold the line for me," he replied, his voice gruff but the flicker of vulnerability unmistakable. "I’ve always stood alone in the heat of battle, and I’ll continue to do so."

Arbor stood, "But you don’t have to stand alone, Stagros. Not in this."

Stagros met Arbor’s gaze, his chest tightening as he felt the pull of something he’d tried so hard to ignore. "You speak as if I’ve ever had a choice," Stagros muttered, his voice softer now, laced with something raw.

Arbor’s eyes softened, his fingertips brushing against the stone of the wall beside Stagros. "Maybe it's time you had one," he said, his

tone not quite daring to be a challenge but laced with something far more dangerous—a desire to close the distance between them.

Stagros' pulse quickened as Arbor’s fingers brushed against the stone behind him. The warmth between them seemed to intensify, the space narrowing until it felt as though nothing else in the world existed but the two of them, caught in the heavy silence.

Stagros’ breath hitched, his thoughts scattered,. He looked down, as if the stone bench beneath him could offer some solace from the tension building in the air. "I don’t need this," he muttered, more to himself than to Arbor, "This… whatever this is."

Arbor was quiet for a long moment, but when he spoke, it was with quiet resolve, his voice steady but filled with an undercurrent of something undeniable. "No one needs it, Stagros. But that doesn’t make it any less nice."

The words hung between them like a challenge, and before Stagros could respond, Arbor took a slow step forward. His hand rested lightly on Stagros' shoulder, he warmth of it, the pressure of it, sent a jolt through Stagros, a sharp, unfamiliar ache that twisted in his chest.

And yet, Stagros closed the distance, his lips brushing against Arbor’s in a brief kiss. Stagros froze, caught off guard by the softness, the gentleness of it. The kiss deepened, just a little, as Arbor’s hand found its way to the back of Stagros’ neck, pulling him slightly closer For a moment, the world outside the bathhouse seemed to vanish entirely, leaving only the two of them in the steam-filled silence.

When they finally pulled away, both of them were breathing harder than before, the heat of the bathhouse now matched by the heat between them. Stagros’ eyes darted to the floor, and then back to Arbor’s face, but neither of them spoke. Neither of

them needed to.

They stood there for a moment longer, neither of them willing to break the silence.

Finally, Stagros sighed, the weight of everything pulling at him again. "The war’s still out there," he said, his voice distant now, retreating into the familiar rhythms of command.

Arbor gave him a half-smile, a soft chuckle escaping his lips. "I guess it is," he said, and with that, the moment passed, and the distance between them widened.

Banner Credits

[xcal1bur25]

For those curious about Trails of Cold Steel and it's ideal party comp, this is the actual specialty of the various members of class VII in cold steel 1 and 2. Note that this applies only to those games, and not 3 where they change things up.

Rean: Appears to be a physical dps with high speed. Arguably is in fact that thing, and can be very effective when built to repeatedly spam 200cp ogre mode S-Crafts. His true potential, however, is as a Delay Spammer. Give him as many sources of Inflict Delay as possible, and have him repeatedly spam Arc Slash. The max number of different sources from items and special attacks should be 5, iirc. Cold Steel calculates status effects weirdly. If you have 5 sources of delay, the game rolls 5 times to see if it procs, and if ANY ONE of those sources procs, the FULL CUMULATIVE delay from all of them is applies to the enemy. So every arc slash (which has a very small amount of self-delay meaning rean's next turn comes up FAST, especially with his speed), has a 50% chance to inflict 30+ turns of delay on an enemy with 90% delay resistance. The only enemy with more than that is the final boss of cs2, who is immune outright. This strategy allows for essentially infinite stunlock.

Alisa: CP Battery. She spams heavenly gift and gives everyone the CP they need to use their own spam strats. Link her with Rean and give her gladiator items so she gets the steady supply of CP she needs to use it every 3 turns. Also, Heavenly Gift gives Insight, the best status buff in the game. Otherwise, spec her as a secondary mage.

Elliot: Best healer in the game. By a lot. Aside from that, his magic attack is second only to emma, so use the slots you aren't using to spec him as a healer to spec him as a magic nuker like her. Also his S-Craft is a full party res, which is nice.

Laura: Physical nuker. She's slow, has like nothing as far as magic stats goes, and while her defensive stats are good, high defenses only go so far. Laura is good at one thing, and one thing only. VIOLENCE. Her STR stat is through the goddamn roof, and she starts the game with an S-Craft, where most character unlock it throughout. This is a hint as to the correct way to use Laura: Keep her as a support member on the bench, swap her in at an ideal moment, take that turn to eat something to buff her attack as much as you can, and then immediately interrupt turn order with a 200cp S-craft. She's a pocket nuke.

Jusis: Spec as a magic knight, though as he should stay in the backline, focus on the "magic" part of that. Jusis is perfectly fine in the frontline, to be clear - several of his crafts even demand it. He stays in the backline (or rather, in the center of the party formation) for positioning reasons - namely, hitting as many party members as possible with Noble Command, an INCREDIBLE buff that increase speed, magic attack, and strength, and STACKS WITH ITSELF, meaning no, you want to spam this shit, not just use it when it's gonna go down. If he has a turn to spare, he should do some magic damage, since that won't force him to move.

Machias: His value comes from the craft Burst Drive, which lets him snap turn order in half. Otherwise, he's a ranged physical dps. I never used him that much but Burst Drive IS OP, don't get me wrong. I just tended to run Rean/Emma/Jusis/Alisa as my main party.

Fie: Seems like a speedy dps like rean, and can be built towards that same goal as a delayer, though slightly less optimally. Her true value, despite her diminutive size and misleading stats, is as a frontline tank. Specifically, an evasion tank. Use items to get her base evasion to 50% and apply the insight buff to make it 100%. Fie is now invincible against anything but magic (interruptible, also Fie specifically is good at interrupting it.) and S-crafts (rare, but also sort of a "you're fucked no matter what, have a full party res in your pocket" thing). Using a correctly built Fie in battle gave me permanent evasion tank brainrot. Evasion tanking is the coolest fighting strategy, in all games and all situations. Fight me.

Emma: Emma...is your nuke. Your beautiful, busty, glasses-wearing NUKE. Her magic attack stat is as bugnuts as Laura's physical attack, and OH BOY can you make use of that. Pandora doubles magic damage, but increases FP cost. Hades doubles the damage of the first spell you cast. Ingenuity lets you regen FP on the field so you go into every battle full. Claoimh Solarion is a spell that does obscene damage to EVERY ENEMY ON THE SCREEN. Do the math. Watch things BURN.

Gaius: Gaius is weird, but from what I understand the best way to run him is as an S-Craft spammer. He uses the ability to trade hp for cp, while a healer keeps him topped off. Then he spams his S-Craft, which i believe also inflicts a guaranteed status? I ran him as a status effect inflicter, but hey, whatever works.

Millium: Millium is a tank and defensive support. So she's not actually good. Just use offense. Or stunlock.

Sara: Sara has the best overall stats in the game, and a number of very, very hard hitting crafts. She is, unfortunately, kneecapped by that very versatility. Sara is broken on paper by having an absurdly high stat total and being second-best at everything. However, she doesn't have any uniquely broken strats like every other character, and lacks a specific niche within a party comp aside from "DPS".

[queersatanic]

How to spot when you're in a cult

How to recognize that you’re in a cult seems so obvious and therefore unnecessary to ask that most people never even bother to do so.

Consequently, it should not be a surprise so many people continue to find themselves in cults and not realize it till years later, if at all.

Let’s get a quick, short definition out of the way, borrowed from the French Interministerial Mission for the Fight against Drugs and Addictive Behaviors:

"A cult is an organized group or a solitary person whose purpose is to dominate cult members by using psychological manipulation and pressure strategies."

A couple of misconceptions: we are not talking about New Religious Movements (NREs)—at least not exclusively. To begin with, those are not necessarily cults, and more importantly, cults are not exclusively "religious" movements.

From Heaven's Gate to Scientology to for-profit face-to-face canvassing, you cannot rely on the self-description of an organization to accurately describe what it does, and like with NXIVM, it usually isn't the supernatural or religious aspects that are actually problematic.

A cult may never have explicitly supernatural or spiritual aspects; they may define themselves by their strict adherence to materialism, even. Thus, if those are the red flags you're looking for, you're not going to notice when no one is talking about god, reincarnation, or quantum pseudoscience.

Cults are a normal part of modern society, not something only at the fringe.

Considering the likely audience of this, it may be tempting to say, “No gods, no masters,” or “obviously capitalism is a cult.”

But this is a feature that appears within the radical, anticapitalist left as well.

The abusiveness of the Party for Socialism and Liberation (PSL) or Democratic Socialists of America (DSA), of Bob Avakian's Revolutionary Communist Party USA, or Gazi Kodzo's Black Hammer organization and its rapid turn toward failed Colorado commune and predation of unhoused people in Atlanta — it is not just “those people” who can fall into this. A Maoist transbian polycule with a central node who controls the sex lives of her partners while leading the “self-crit” sessions — this is only tangentially the faults of capitalism.

No one is immune from this, no one is safe. Because while cults can express themselves in all of these various ways, they are not only taking advantage of the weakest or worst of us; they don’t even always take us in our weakest or worst moments.

Cults also will, like a cordyceps fungus, repurpose your strengths and talent to their own ends. Your incredible intelligence and reasoning abilities will be turned to explaining why you should continue to support this particular cult despite all evidence to the contrary. Your empathy will make you care about others still in the cult that leaving it would mean leaving behind. You will convince yourself that reform is possible and you just need to go through the proper channels that the abusers just happen also to control.

To review: a cult can like anything and anyone can find themselves in one.

But most cults by their nature do not lead with the weirdest shit first. Some go as far as to have front companies recruiting people to one thing, then slowly introduce this other thing when a target is thought suitable and their defenses are down.

For most people, there won’t be a clear, sudden indicator because they will be surrounded by others who treat these power dynamics as normal and good. Peer pressure is not just something middle schoolers fall victim to but something all of us experience.

Even if you leave, all that does is reinforce the survivor bias and culture of those who remain, feeding the narratives of exclusivity, elitism, and persecution to keep members cleaved from the outside.

Back to the question: how do you spot that you’re in a cult?

It’s crucial that you actually bother to ask. It’s crucial that you have the humility to assess your surroundings, your choices, and be willing to walk away from stuff you’ve invested in when you realize your mistake, sunk costs be damned.

There are various guides you can use, but a pretty robust if still subjective one is Isaac Bonewits’ Advanced Bonewits Cult Danger Evaluation Frame (ABCDEF), rating 18 categories to score from one-to-10.

There are others. ABCDEF works best for new religious movements; Gwen Snyder taking business cults to task highlighted some issues Bonewits did not.

Certainly, neither person is themself infallible. Consider both nothing more than starting points.

So far, we haven’t talked much about anarchist groups or dynamics, and you may assume that’s because we are not power worshipers, fascists, Marxist-Leninists, so our praxis inoculates us.

That is bunk.

It is true that anarchist critiques of hierarchy apply to cults as well. An anarchist may not always be able to recognize a hierarchy, but we ought to have a good idea of our response when we do.

Yet anarchists are not immune from becoming cult leaders. Those who exploit others this way are not uniquely evil or a different species from us. A cult leader may be wholly sincere and actually believe they are just that special, that irreplaceable.

If you are an anarchist, you should always be thinking about and planning for your replacement. You will die one day. You may be disabled before that, or jailed before that, or "canceled"; don't think you are not capable of being an abuser, including in ways that meant almost nothing to you but everything to who you hurt.

Anything you're doing should not rely solely on you to not fail. The group you are part of should not require one person, you or anyone else, who is so essential that others are tempted to give them a pass because the work is so important and they are so valuable to the work.

Having said all this, is the vaccination against hierarchical cult abuses a panacea against all abuses? Clearly not.

A cult is one kind of hierarchy.

It is often starkly hierarchical and dangerous but not the only way for an organization or group dynamics to be abusive. We have to work very hard to guard ourselves against these, too; that is anarchism.

We need collective action from non-blood relations willing to work together and help one another. We need to radically re-imagine and embody different ways of living, different possibilities of seeing the world. The taboos of the status quo are not extant always because they serve most of us or benefit any but a few.

And still, attempts to create alternatives to what we have inherited are not guaranteed to be improvements, and in our desperation at the state of the world or just our own lives, we can pursue groups—usually new groups—that lack the protective guardrails erected by necessity to keep a collective functioning since, without them, the group implodes.

How do you spot you're in a cult?

Think about what power is and who has it, and never stop looking or talking to other people about what you see.

Interrogate yourself, don't make excuses for your friends, and kill your heroes so you can meet real people worth knowing.

[sanajeh1909]

Natal Chart Analysis : Chamber

First of all this is headcanon of mine and im not an expert in analyzing birth charts, i only know little about this so i got some help from my acquiantances. I compared his chart qualities with his lore , his personality and his voice lines in this article. The comparison can be irrelevant on some parts because of my lack of knowledge in English. Please respect even if this doesnt meet with your expectations i have put a lot of effort in this. This is hell of a long article. I have written with some a lot of details and i cut it short, otherwise it would be hell of a long article than it already is. I had to think about general species of the zodiac signs and i found Scorpio as the most suitable zodiac sign to him. I went from his release date (16 November) as reference, and for his birth year all i knew was he is between 25-30 years old. So i calculated every year between 1993-1998. As his birthplace (i dont know if RIOT gave this type of information about this) i went with Paris because i have no idea where he can be born in France. In the end i came to the conclusion that his birthdate and birthplace may be : 13 November 1993 07.10 pm Paris/France

THE SUN IN SCORPIO

☽ Scorpios know what they want and won't go out and grab it at the wrong moment. They sit back, watch (quite expertly), and then get it only when the moment is just right. It might seem like patience, but it's more likely their powerful skills at strategy at work. Scorpios aren't afraid of getting their hands (their bodies, their minds) dirty. The darker side of life intrigues them, and they're always ready to investigate.

☽ Physical energy and courage. Strong passions. Regeneration and improvement. Strong sexual powers.

☽ Potential issues: He is suspicious, defiant, extremist; he is sometimes vindictive. ☾ The Frenchman Vincent Fabron lives his life in search of one necessary goal, willing to sacrifice anything that gets in his way of achieving it. He has spent much of his time involved with combat and weapons, having worked for the French military before becoming a PMC marksman and then a weapons designer for Kingdom Defense. His employment at Kingdom was only a stepping stone for him though, as by this point he was already set on his path in pursuit of his sacred truth.

THE SUN IN 6TH HOUSE ☽ The work that they do and the services that they offer are very important to their sense of identity. To feel good about themselves, they need to be busy with daily activities and produce work they can be proud of. They are sensitive to criticism about their work, and they work best when they create their own schedule. ☽ Helpful, concerned, detail-oriented, observant, competent but not hugely ambitious, and sometimes given to fretting. Various minor health issues or concerns, and a strong attachment to his work or routine.

SQUARE BETWEEN SUN AND SATURN ☽ Self-awareness to the point of real self-consciousness is possible with this aspect. Aim to worry far less about always being right or appearing suave and accomplished. When they ease the pressure they put on themselves, they don't face as many brick walls. ☽ Magnetic, intuitive, inventive, unique, and innovative, always seeing where improvements and progress can be made. At his best when he feels free to be themselves--doesn't like to be told what to do. ☾ With a blend of suave nonchalance, professional poise, and smug comedy, Chamber is fully confident with the skill he provides and the value that he offers. He sets high standards for himself and his team, reminding everyone that if they were to secure victories, they might as well go all-out and be the best in what they do.

"None of this "a win is a win" nonsense. We should win big and look good doing it."

THE MOON IN SCORPIO

☽ Lunar Scorpios are diggers in the world of emotion--they can see beyond facades and cut right to a person's core. This ability to "see" what isn't apparent to the rest of the world can be intimidating to others or wildly attractive, depending on the audience. Most have powerful, emotionally intense lives. Some feel like it is beyond their control -- these natives seem to attract emotional upheaval, and their lives appear to consist of plenty of dramatic ups and downs. Doing things halfway or having meaningless relationships simply doesn't fulfill them. Lunar Scorpios want all or nothing.

☽ Moon in Scorpio people often have a strong fear of betrayal. Some will put the people they love through a series of tests, and these are not always conscious. Their apparent suspicion can be trying for the people who love them. ☽ Potential issues: difficulty letting go.

THE MOON IN 6TH HOUSE

☽ They have an emotional need to be useful, work productively, be organized and on top of things, and lead a healthy life. If these matters are chaotic, it's a symptom of emotional unrest. Their observation skills are excellent, and they succeed at whatever they choose to do. They are a valued worker.

☽ They are excellent at finding flaws, quickly seeing details others overlook. A problem-solver, they not only recognize problems, but they are also compelled to fix them. People see they as a great friend, supportive, knowledgeable, insightful, and reliable.

SQUARE BETWEEN THE MOON AND SATURN

☽ When the Moon is in hard aspect to Saturn in the natal chart, natives need to learn to trust others more. Fear keeps them from fully enjoying personal relationships, and fear is behind the occasional rigidity that they express. When they let themselves receive nurture or care from others, an inner voice cautions them that it might not be sincere, long-lasting, or enough! This is essentially a defense mechanism designed to protect themselves from harshness in the world.

☽ Changeable moods, a reserved character, can be stubborn and may lack assurance. ☾ Chamber has shown friendliness with many of the agents in the Protocol, but he is very much aware that he holds many secrets which are better kept hidden. It's revealed much of Chamber's history is swathed in a veil of making deals and withholding the truth from those around him on multiple occasions.

SEXTILE BETWEEN THE MOON AND URANUS

☽ Their life is out-of-the-ordinary, with lots of changes and a great knowledge of the world not necessarily through reading but through personal experience and brilliant intuition. They like the sensational, new things. They act instinctively, but fortunately has a good sixth sense. They like to be surrounded by original people, artists.

SEXTILE BETWEEN THE MOON AND NEPTUNE

☽ Kind and sympathetic, with a strongly compassionate nature. When in love, they are usually very devoted. In fact, they are devoted by nature, not only in matters of the heart. More often than not, their intuition is correct, although their imagination is also powerful and they can read too much into a situation as a result.

CONJUCTION BETWEEN THE MOON AND THE PLUTO

☽ They can waver between a rich and successful domestic life and social success. Very perceptive and given to psychoanalyzing people. A strategist. Powerful emotions and intense feelings.

MERCURY IN SCORPIO

☽ They are extremely observant and astute, always reading between the lines and looking for the real meaning behind things. Passionate in speech, excellent at strategy. Natural psychologist.

MERCURY IN 5TH HOUSE

☽ Taste for intellectual games, sports that require skill and finesse. They are very curious about everything, even in love.

☽ They can be witty and humorous, an engaging communicator, and a fun friend. They love playing games, especially ones that employ their intellect. They love tricks, jokes, plays on words, and mimicry. They might be skilled at impersonations. Some of them could be clever at lying.

"Oh no, invaders here to take our radianite. Laughs I'm sorry, let's go shoot them."

"Toaster is broken!"

"It is sad what happened here, such a terrible accident. One that I have nothing to do with."

CONJUCTION BETWEEN MERCURY - VENUS

☽ They enjoy speaking and writing, and they do both with charm and artistry. Their intellectual pleasures are very much influenced by their feelings. They are amorous and sensual. They like beauty, the arts, travelling, frequent changes of scenery. Aims always for diplomacy. Very charming.

CONJUCTION BETWEEN MERCURY - JUPITER

☽ They are intelligent with big ideas: They are tolerant and have a strong sense of justice. They have good judgement, good sense and have their feet on the ground. 

VENUS IN SCORPIO

☽ Venus in Scorpio people attract others with their intensity and willingness to commit. Their appeal lies in their focus on you, and their dedication. Venus in Scorpio seems fearless when it comes to intimacy. Potential lovers get the feeling that Venus in Scorpio will never stray, that they are intensely loyal to the one they love. They possess you, and somehow make it seem attractive to be possessed.

☽ They have a strong need to control their partner, although this won't be immediately apparent, and they may not ever admit to this. Their body-and-soul love and commitment can be so intense that it eclipses fun and makes loving them a very heavy experience. Their emotion and intensity may seem overdone to those looking for a more lighthearted relationship.

☽ When you've upset these lovers, you'll know it. Depending on the moment, Venus in Scorpio will shoot you one of the most piercing glares around, or totally blow up. Whichever style they choose, a slighted Scorpio lover is not a pretty sight. These people can be jealous of all of your attachments, but few will admit it. 

☽ Remember, though, that some Venus in Scorpio lovers can and will take advantage of you on a subtle level, if only to keep you all to themselves.

☽ Sensual and passionate. Passions run hot and cold. Full of ardor and desire where the partner needs to be able to match his level. Can be jealous and possessive. If disappointed or deceived in love, he can become bitter. Usually very loyal.

VENUS IN 5TH HOUSE

☽ There is a romantic, playful side to them that is unmistakable. They enjoy surrounding themselves with beautiful art and music, and these may play a role in their ideal date scenario. They are generally quite loyal to their partner, and they are both charming and easily charmed. It's also easy to turn their head. They are a warm, fun and playful date.

CONJUCTION BETWEEN VENUS - JUPITER

☽ They are good-hearted and generous, possessing a good character. They have good relations with their social circle. They are easy to approach. All the same, they may fall in love easily. They have a successful partnership and professional life. People usually trust them.

MARS IN SAGITTARIUS

☽ Most of the time, Mars in Sagittarius is playful and fun-loving. They love friendly debates, although they can go to extremes. Mars in Sagittarius people see themselves as warm-blooded folk. They can be blunt with people, although if they have a more tactful Mercury placement, this quality will be subdued. heir direct, blunt approach is most obvious in bed. They're passionate lovers, and are turned on by open-mindedness and good humor.

☽ Mars in Sagittarius can be a little hard to understand. Sometimes they seem to be the most easy-going of people--they love a good joke and a good time. Other times they are on fire--intense and impassioned about something or other. 

☽ Mars in Sagittarius is used to getting their way and persuading others to believe what they believe in. Every now and again, they face the few that don't quite buy their grand theories, or, worse yet, poke holes in their plans. This is when these normally fun-loving people get frustrated. In fact, they take it personally when others don't agree with their philosophies.

MARS IN 6TH HOUSE

☽ They tend to work hard, sometimes to the point of exhaustion! They put a lot of energy into their work, and would do best working for themselves or for someone else but independently, as they can quickly become impatient if other members of a team are not working as fast as them. They can easily become riled up or defensive if someone criticizes or intrudes upon the work that they do.

CONJUCTION BETWEEN MARS - PLUTO

☽ They are ambitious with a great capacity for work and effort, self-confidence, and determination. Will stick it out to the end with his plans. They are committed, determined, and passionate. They are generally confident about their own talents. They are naturally very resourceful and usually quite persistent when pursuing a goal. 

☾ Through a series of emails found on Fracture, it's discovered that both Chambers have been working together towards an unknown goal for potentially as long as a year. In Fracture, we can assume that the Chambers attacked and kidnapped Thomas Poe, for reasons that aren't fully clear. It is likely to interrogate him for some valuable information on the Facility and the work they are doing there. 

JUPITER IN SCORPIO

☽ Values decisiveness, intensity, willpower, commitment, and strength. Very strong problem-solving nature, cutting to the chase. Science and research may be prosperous avenues.

JUPITER IN 5TH HOUSE

☽ He has much passion that lights up his days. He is lucky in love, but also professionally, with pleasant working conditions and duties.

TRINE BETWEEN JUPITER - SATURN

☽ They are serious, patient, honest, hard-working, orderly. Their judgment is good and they are inclined to think things over. They pursues their objectives to the bitter end, usually knowing when to choose the right moment. They are upright, usually law-abiding and respecting order.

TRINE BETWEEN JUPITER - ASCENDANT

☽ They like meeting friends, enjoying a good meal and cordial atmospheres. They are pleasant, jovial, and engaging.

TRINE BETWEEN JUPITER - MIDHEAVEN

☽ They live the high life, wanting to have fun but knowing what they want and doing what is necessary to get it. They want to - and does - succeed socially. This is a "work hard, play hard" placement.

SATURN IN AQUARIUS

☽ Long-term studies and, if family circumstances do not allow this, they will teach himself. They are serious and methodical in work, perhaps liking to visit the elderly and intellectuals who enrich their mind.

☽ Potential weaknesses: a sense of having bad luck and frequent disappointed hopes.

SATURN IN 9TH HOUSE

☽ They are studious, patient, rigorous, austere. They like reflection, meditation. They carry out all the plans he makes. They can be a stay-at-home.

SQUARE BETWEEN SATURN - PLUTO

☽ They are not always open to others' ideas, especially if they are disorganized or free-thinking. They should watch for rigid thinking and egoism.

TRINE BETWEEN SATURN - ASCENDANT

☽ They are serious, sober, thoughtful, paying attention to detail. They like to be with older or mature/serious people.

CONJUCTION BETWEEN SATURN - MIDHEAVEN

☽ They are ambitious, but in a deliberate, calculated, well-balanced way. They are persevering, mostly serious, and orderly. They climb the ladder slowly but surely; if need be, they are willing to change his ideas. They are wise and experienced.

URANUS IN CAPRICORN

☽ A great battler. They have so much power that one thinks nothing can defeat them. Their mission in society and in the world can mean everything to them.

URANUS IN 8TH HOUSE

☽ Their financial situation has its highs and lows, which an inheritance can help out.

CONJUCTION BETWEEN URANUS - NEPTUNE

☽ They can be wildly creative with an odd but happy sense of humor and perspective. They are an idealist, easily disappointed by those using power plays to advance.

SQUARE BETWEEN URANUS - LILITH

☽ They may have difficulties achieving a peaceful love life. They can have lots of adventures, love-at-first-sights which can lead him into risky territory, as these can complicate and perhaps even poison their life.

NEPTUNE IN CAPRICORN

☽ They are discerning, wise, and sensible.

NEPTUNE IN 8TH HOUSE

☽ May have problems collecting inheritance and could encounter difficulties on a financial level through the marital partner. Most often quite creative and imaginative sexually, and they understand and accepts a wide range of styles and preferences in these matters.

SQUARE BETWEEN NEPTUNE - LILITH

☽ Love can dominate their life. They could lose their head over someone to whom there's an intense attraction, which can become troublesome if they lose all idea of reality. If they are not loved in return, so what - they will love for the two of them. With time, if the bond loses its spark, they can have difficulty disentangling themselves and they can suffer enormously. It's best to look to a trusted outside source for guidance in vulnerable times.

"Viper, don't pretend you're not happy to see me. You're smiling on the inside, I know it."

PLUTO IS IN SCORPIO

☽ Fear of betrayal.

☾ The Blackmailer admits that they do not know of Chamber's motives but mentions that there is one truth that he holds sacred, suspects that it is only true moral, the only thing that he wants in life. The Blackmailer states that no matter what Chamber's intents are, his deeds will be judged, always result in the world referring to him as a villain and asks him if he can face the possibility of being seen as villain if the judgement goes against him, implying he may struggle with even the thought of being judged with disgust, she questions whether he can live with such treatment.

PLUTO IN 6TH HOUSE

☽ Power struggles can be an ongoing issue at work. 

SQUARE BETWEEN PLUTO - MIDHEAVEN

☽ They may risk losing everything, having to start from scratch in order to duke it out with authority figures. They may end up in meaningless stalemates with bosses and authority figures, which can block them from achieving success or goals at times.

LILITH IN ARIES

☽ There can be some fear of taking the lead, asserting oneself, and making executive decisions.

TRUE NORTH NODE IN SAGITTARIUS

☽ They may limit themselves unknowingly through mental overstimulation or by overdoing logic at the expense of intuition. They may have so many things going at once that they only dabbles and does notcommit to a particular project or path. Their path is to tune out distractions and build faith in their intuition so that they can follow a vision. ☽ Qualities to develop: Prioritizing, commitment to a path, faith.

NORTH NODE IN 6TH HOUSE

☽ They tends to retreat or escape when times are tough, and while they are a compassionate and perceptive person, they may limit their luck and opportunities by avoiding the realities of their life. When they do not know all the facts, they may live in fear of them! Their path is to pay more attention to details and routines, even if these feel uncomfortable at first. Doing so will build emotional and physical health. ☽ Qualities to develop: proactivity, diligence.

ASCENDANT GEMINI (GEMINI ON HOUSE 1)

☽ There is a cleverness to Gemini Ascendants that can intimidate some, especially sensitive folk. People with, for example, predominant Water signs may feel a little ill at ease with Gemini rising people (that is, before they get to know them more personally), while strong Air types more fully appreciate the fun and cleverness of these individuals.

☽ I have found two styles of presentation most common with Gemini rising people. One style is bubbly, changeable, talkative, and a little quirky. These natives are interesting and fun. They constantly explain things, whether it's their own behavior and opinion or those of the world around them.

☽ Another distinct "style" is a rather cool and intellectual demeanor. These natives are often quite witty and clever, but they present themselves in a less cheerful and changeable way than the first group. Their observations are sharp and the overall manner is a tad brusque.

☽ No matter the style, Gemini rising natives are given to analysis and making sense of their world. Their powers of observation are well-developed, they are mentally active (more often than not, their minds are racing!), and they almost always have something bright or witty to say. 

CANCER ON HOUSE 2

☽ Cancer is a fruitful sign to have on a money house. They can rely on sound instincts to acquire and save money. Very good money sense. They can use their keen ability to home in on what the public wants and needs, and benefit financially.

LEO ON HOUSE 3

☽ Keenly interested in education, and a good teacher. They are a very good organizer. Everything is carefully studied, explained, and swiftly executed.

LEO ON HOUSE 4

☽ May conduct family life like a business, rigorously and authoritatively. Great sense of organization, looking after what they own well, with pride.

VIRGO ON HOUSE 5

☽ They do not lack for practical sense to run their business and home. They are ingenious and good with their hands. They are modest and prudish.

SCORPIO ON HOUSE 6

☽ May like risky professions. Health: the genital area.

SAGITTARIUS ON HOUSE 7

☽ A union with a foreigner or a marriage abroad. They seek happiness and intellectual companionship more than anything.

CAPRICORN ON HOUSE 8

☽ Natural death in very old age likely. Inheritances.

AQUARIUS ON HOUSE 9

☽ A professional, they are innovative and original. They like travel, communicating with different people. Long research.

AQUARIUS ON HOUSE 10

☽ Success in teaching. He likes contact with others, to speak and explain in the profession.

PISCES ON HOUSE 11

☽ They may have only a few friends, but with these the friendship is sincere and frank.

TAURUS ON HOUSE 12

☽ Business affairs will have their highs and lows, financial loss can be heavy if it does happen.

"Be careful near the ship, that portal does not work as intended. Such a bad investment."

Thank you for reading all these. I know its long but i tried my best to create the chart, analyze and compare with Chamber's characteristics. There might be some/a lot of information on the chart that doesnt fit him, but its hard to make a whole chart fit to defined character (since all the calculations are already hard to find to fit his personality).

Again, thanks for reading. I hope it does fit him like i calculated on natal chart.

[kafkaoftherubble]

纯属自娱。

Ada's Relationship with F (2) The effect influences the cause and that influences the effect

As mentioned previously, Ada's relationship with F is complicated.

That's because Ada doesn't have enough friends. She's a bit starved for them, you see. Why else would she idealize the Blind Boy so much after his untimely death?

The Blind Boy held the position of being both a genuine friend and a boyfriend. He satisfied both her platonic and romantic needs. He set an example—a standard.

To be honest, the Blind Boy probably wouldn't be able to withstand Ada's intense dependence on him for both social needs any while longer, especially since they were both just 14-year-olds. Blind Boy might have been kind, but he was still not a saint, and he was still a kid. Ada might have been used to restraining herself due to her foster parents being politicians commanding way too much attention, she exhibited less self-control when she's with the Blind Boy.

He was a friend after all. Ada thought that meant he would be okay with her showing who she was.

This mindset—trying to fulfill so many social needs from one single source—has only ballooned as Ada grows older. Years of being denied that little food for secured companionship had become habitual hunger. She has become even more cautious as to who she can designate as her "friend;" but once that person is seen as one, Ada shows a side of her even she herself isn't aware of.

---

F is, at the most basic level, the only person she feels secure enough to call "a friend" without the fear that he's been making a fool of her or secretly hates her all along.

He saves her life from Emily. When Emily finds out about Ada by accident in her quest to look for F, it takes only a few moments of Ada being unimpressive and "dull-witted"—and therefore, an embarrassing failure of a Ghoul—for Emily to decide that there is nothing to be gained from absorbing Ada and resort to simply kill the latter outright. Just like she did when she was an embryo in Tube E.

Ada manages to escape her with wit, a ton of luck, the dumbass strategies of someone who doesn't wanna die because she's still waiting for her big break as "the chosen one," and a coward's determination to survive. Just like she did when she was an embryo in Tube A.

Most of all, though—Ada's safety is only truly secured after she meets F, who sucker-punches Emily into defeat by showcasing psychic powers Emily has never seen or thought possible.

F is Ada's security, defense, and protection. Ada knows she needs him, from then on, to live. But how can she make sure F is willing to stick with her?

Well, she needs to make him dependent on her. She must ensure he sees her as vital to his current life. She needs to make him rely on her, and ideally, F should be more dependent on her than she does him. This way, F won't realize he's being used.

Politics, babe. Ada's foster parents might not have wanted her for a while by now, but you don't teach people via formal lessons alone. Sometimes you teach by example, and that's what the Politician and Mrs. Politician did.

F does need her. He's not just a little naive—he's actually willingly looking for someone to direct him. He may have run away to find liberation for his personal suffering, but that doesn't mean he magically breaks away from all the habits and molds he's been built from. He still looks for someone to guide him—a creature of no strong sense of self and belief he's never gonna be human—from the outside. He's looking for the next LR.

F's expression of naivety is... strange, due to his powers. He can sound wise and recognize the delusions the humans around him believe in, and yet he also doesn't seem to realize when people are using him nor how to protect his self-interests. To be fair, F doesn't hold common-held beliefs as others. For example, he doesn't think being used as a tool is wrong so long as he doesn't suffer from the process. If it had helped someone, F too would not mind having been used. One can debate if he's right or wrong.

One might think that Ada is using F. That this is an arrangement benefitting only one side.

But he's willing. It's mutualism.

---

But that's not the end of it. That mutualism leads to more places.

Ada has another motive to be close to F. Chiefly, she wants to absorb him. Both she and the Others want this.

For Ada, F's powers are the best things she wishes she had. She is jealous of him; while F yearns to be beyond a weapon (to be human, in other words), Ada just wants to be a Ghoul capable of beating Emily and becoming the object of fawning attention and deference. Ada also thinks her true, latent powers can only be awakened if she eats F.

Besides, F has once calmed her head down and brought her peace through his powers. Ada secretly hopes she can gain this peace permanently if she absorbs him and makes his psychic powers hers.

The Others, though, have slightly different goals. They want Ada to gain power so Ada can stop being so pathetic so they can live as true Ghouls instead of pieces of consciousness clinging to someone useless. F's powers might also free them from Ada's head and implant themselves into others; perhaps Ada's awakened powers combined with F's can resurrect the Others as their own entity. Even if this scenario fails, they can always fight for dominance over Ada's body after F is absorbed, so whoever wins can have true power and freedom.

And that is still not the end of her sentiments toward F.

---

There are more than just mutualism and ulterior motives. There's also genuine affection. The Blind Boy's standards have returned.

F is genuinely prone toward compassion. He's gentle, quiet, nonaggressive. For a weapon, he's ironically less hostile than the humans he's created to ruin. His kindness makes him easy to approach.

F has a calming effect on people due to his powers and disposition. A person who's always embroiled in mental suffering—such as Ada, plagued by the Others—will soon get intoxicated by F's effects. She relaxes around him. She feels accepted and safe. She feels as if she's the best version she could have been had she not been cursed with the Others.

F fulfills her platonic need handily. F fulfills her dream to be useful and someone to be relied on. F gives her security in many ways. F needs her, she thinks.

Ada has a crush on F.

Despite the two of them being rather related due to their nature as experiments of Project G(ho)u(l).

Ada loves F romantically, too. She cannot help it.

To be continued.

Written at 10.30pm, July 9th.