#this isnt hate tho i love michael jus not Like That

[liverpool-enjoyer]

was nobody gonna tell me? was i supposed to find out the hard way that people write x reader fics of michael afton?

[vissla]

.

[judehayward]

lady gaga voice slowly fadin in: ju-Das juda-ah-ah… this depressed goblin bastard is honestly my fav male muse like i dnt typically stick w male muses tht long i struggle bt................. i’ve played him the longest of them all n always seem to return to him. jst cnt stay away. way 2 attached to this absurd little man. it’s nai btw!!!! (josefine on the main). launches right in to jude’s intro without further adieu..... (u can also find his playlist here) 🧙‍🎨

「douglas booth & cis-male」⇾ hayward , jude, the senior radcliffe student’s records show that he is a pisces and 23 years old. he is studying ART, living in moris and can be protective, laidback, nonsensical & apathetic. when i see him i am reminded of wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects, lead marbles instead of eyes. ⇽「nai & 23 & gmt & she/her.」

he pinterest:

me in the voice of a card magician performing on the street: round up round up pick a pinterest any pinterest!

ta-da it’s aesthetics:

lead marbles instead of eyes, a stolen hearse careening down the wrong lane, wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, bags under the eyes that are so big they could pack enough clothes for a three week vacation, a cigarette wobbling from your bottom lip as you squint against the sunlight, passing out on a stranger’s rooftop, placing sunglasses over the eyes of a biology lab skeleton, gangling around the place like shaggy minus his scooby snacks, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects

about tha Bitch:

born in sheffield in england, bt they went back and forth between there n san fran a lot

jude was an unhappy accident. his parents never rly used protection bc they were super Liberal n Au Naturel n believed in the pull out method bc… they were maniacs. bt then the ONE time they used a condom in an effort to b safety conscious it broke n hence…. jude was born

they just kind of ran w it bc they had such a passionate relationship tht they were like What The Hell…. may as well! itll be fine we’ll learn to be good parents n love him like normal ppl do

spoiler alert: tht didn’t work out

they were ok to him like they weren’t fully Bad bt they just found him to be a massive burden n hindrance to their plans. pretty absent n irresponsible. they literally….. had sex all day every day n acted like a pair of teenagers. it ws a super weird environment for a kid to grow up in bc he literally had no role models or… guidance or…. anything rly. occasionally they’d joke around w him or pretend they properly knew what grade he was going into but for the most part they just Didn’t Care the way parents shd. they lost his birth certificate n dnt remember what they put as his middle name so he’s jst kind of like hmmmm............. n gives himself a diff one every time ppl ask. past variations hv included: jude pauly hayward, jude maureen hayward, jude van winkle hayward. says all of these w a very straight face

despite this he does hv some nice memories w them. usually he definitely sees them fr holidays. frm being rly young their christmas tradition hs been to get a bunch of chinese food like a Banquet Feast n spend all day smoking n drinking into the early hours. perhaps not the healthiest or most responsible bt 😔 jude rly likes it it’s kind of the one time of yr he feels he has a proper family

they r both suuuuper into the arts. rly good sculptors bt they paint too n they actually own a successful gallery in sheffield n san fran

(trauma tw) as a result he grew up around a lot of creative n sometimes pretentious ppl. the friends of his parents were more present in his life than his ACTUAL parents bc they were always jetting off to diff countries to scout out new pieces fr their galleries n just have a gd time in beautiful places without…. the annoyance tht ws being responsible n looking after someone. tbh some of his parents friends were rly damaging too bt….i won’t go into that just yet. it doesn’t rly…need properly explaining bc jude never talks abt it anyway n it….is rather triggering so i’ll jst….leav it for now tbh. basically they just were Not Nice n jude had a lot of bad memories he keeps repressed bt he also??? has some gd ones..... it was a strange environment bt he’s a survivor

(death n grief tw) he hd to do community service bc he kind of… hd a bit of a breakdown before the funeral of his elderly neighbour who bsically raised him bc her kids rly didnt care abt her they jst wanted her inheritance?? so he… stole the hearse w her casket still in it n ws jst like… drivin around the place sort of… tryin nt to cry…..KJJFHSFKJGHKFG i mean. it isnt funny its actually sad bt :/ in a very bizarre n jude way. he gt caught n taken in fr questioning bt her son kind of realised hw… broken up abt her death jude ws n had a heart n didnt press charges. regardless he stil hd to do community service bc it ws like taken seriously even tho it ws his first proper offence. doin it rly exhausted n depressed him so when he wsnt doin tht he ws just hibernatin in his room……. this ws like 4 months ago nw............ just some fun lore fr u all

bc of how he ws raised he has a p cultured taste. he luvs classic lit n p much anything artsy. he can play piano 2 n sometimes gets rly high n thinks he’s mozart level gd at composing he’s jst going fking wild on the keys in a trance...... i mean he’s gd bt… chill

he’s rly sarcastic n so deadpan like he’ll say smthn completely ridiculous bt he’ll say it w his whole chest so sincere.... it’s rly hard to tell when he’s joking or serious honestly. has an overflowing secret sketchbook n if he cares abt someone he’ll probably secretly draw them. does NOT share these drawings w the person he hates being openly sentimental. at heart he is jst a very Sad Boy w lots of repressed issues like depression genuinely just does NAT giv him a single break bt he plasters over this w wise cracks n never discusses his emotions ever. he’s actually p decent or at least tries to b. he’s kind of like tht bit in superbad where michael cera gets rly drunk n makes a toast to women like tht energy...........

he has rly bad insomnia so he like never sleeps idk how he’s Alive straight up. please go to bed sir............. he always has rly sleepy eyes n rubs them tiredly mid conversation. he smokes a lot of weed to try n compensate fr this n make him tired bt he still struggles a lot

ANYWAY that aside he’s at radcliffe doing art, focusing on fine art like painting is............... the thing he luvs most...... his style is kind of.......... taking normal things n painting w surreal colours.... he likes A LOT of colour in his paintings which is kind of a stark contrast to his personality bc his world’s so.... washed out n grey............ lovs art n philosophy n literature n photography n music.... 

ummMMMMmm honestly idk i’m blankin on what else to say. ull find him smoking weed reading an american classic or gnawing at his thumbnail n getting charcoal smudges on all his clothes. wandering the streets in plaid pj bottoms n dr martens eating frm a cereal box without care in the world. he’s p broody n scruffy n he’s mostly here fr a laidback time....... doesn’t rly like when ppl take themselves too seriously........ likes strange ppl thinks the world is mde richer by them n likes when ppl can jst bounce back jokes at him without being like erm. u dont make sense mate. bc frankly he can come up w some strange stuff sometimes.............. talking to him cn b like navigating a dark n bendy road without a flashlight....... 

(drugs tw) once did shrooms n woke up naked in the woods curled up in a pile of leaves. to this day he recounts this as his werewolf transformation. hs no idea hw he ended up there n when ppl r like are u not. concerned jude. tht is so strange? he jst shrugs like.............. dunno....................... suppose i’m jst a werewolf upon occasion. so casual abt it. jst truly does Not care abt most things at all..... almost to the point tht it’s concerning (sometimes way past the point tht it’s concerning too :/)

this is the desc on an aesthetic i mde of his style once n sums it up well!! ‘additionally: too many pairs of trousers, a hideous amount of white t-shirts all somewhat stained with charcoal, a jumper so thinly knit it almost looks sheer, chipped teale nail varnish, a cream corduroy jacket with a cigarette hole singed onto the cuff, vintage wiry reading glasses he almost never wears, a freshly rolled cigarette behind his ear, a thrifted t-shirt with a warped bart simpson wearing a stethoscope with the caption ‘bard knwos cardiology’ and two crops hacked that way with kitchen scissors that he sometimes wears to paint.‘

EXPERT at rolling spliffs like jst. mkes them so precise n neat....... it’s his super power. his fav thing to smoke frm is banana flavour papers.................... linking 2 this he’s like. bad w emotions bt he does try..... once his friend (maggie) ws sad so he brought her a spliff wrapped in grape flavoured paper bc it’s her fav fruit n jst like. wordlessly gave it to her. it’s the thought tht counts.....

PLOTS!!!!!

plays bass in a band which cld b a fun connection to get together??? i picture the music being like surf rock type like........... mac demarco...... bt he also luvs elliott smith n glass animals n the cure n metronomy n neutral milk hotel n talking heads n radiohead n mazzy star n wolf alice...................... idk jst like.... within tht ballpark i suppose i imagine it being................

mayb ppl he shares classes w?????? i’d like someone tht does a similar course n they hang out tgether when it comes to trips fr the module to museums or exhibits or wtever................ they both stand in front of paintings analysing it rly wrong n saying stuff like hmmmmmmmmm....... i do declare i see a, uh..... large phallus protruding from the centre of this image...... moves something in me.......... n some elderly person looking at it besides them is like Ergh. sickened n disgraced. leaves w a brow severely furrowed

someone he smokes w on the moris rooftop late at night when he cnt sleep??? mayb they’re up n cnt sleep either fr whtever reason n it’s become an unspoken kind of ritual where they always clamber out n find each other there n jst wordlessly keep them company

jude is kind of like. protective almost to a fault sometimes........... mayb some guy he’s punched......................... if they hurt someone he cares abt........... typically it wld hv been a girl he ws kind of like. affected by his first relationship bc she had a bad home situation n ever since jst wnts..... to Protect it’s kind of like an automatic instinct ingrained in him nw 😔 all sounds very noble n well bt sometimes it cn b a bit of an escalation i wnt lie

perhaps a few hook-ups??? jude doesn’t tend to sleep w ppl he rly knows bc he just..... likes it to b an impersonal thing doesn’t like getting attached fr various reasons so mayb they only kno each other via this OR mayb he bent his rules a bit..... cld either work seamlessly or hv added drama if one side hs mre feelings or whtever

currently living in moris w 2 roommates bt i’d love some neighbours perhaps..... mayb someone tht lives directly nxt door to his room n is like ://// bc he plays music loud n weeds always drifting frm his window n mking their room smell if theirs is open too................. or mayb they get on..... mayb there’s a rly mean seagull tht lands on a branch n poos on pedestrians n they both commentate on it frm their windows like david attenborough...... they’re like he’s at it again. they’ve named him n everything

HONESTLY anything if u have an idea hmu i’d love 2 hear it.......... rubs my hands tgether in excitement to plot up a storm w u all

[survivormuxloe]

Episode 14: “It’s Five Guys Burgers and Fries” - Mo

AAAAAA AHRRE IS GONE!!! IM IN FINAL 5!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THIS IS SO FUCKING EXCITING

its been so nervewracking this entire game holding my idol... not knowing when to play it... being a paranoid mess?? but im legit in f5. here. about to play my idol and show everyone that i had the social + strategical game to be able to NOT ONLY KEEP IT BUT FIND IT. like knowing im in f4 is so fucking validating and ik im not there yet but i'm not pulling a loris and giving myself 5th lol. and even better than that ryan has had his idol from fucking like day 2 and we've been able to keep them in this long and i love him soooooo much hes honestly one of my bestest friends nnnn

i just feel really bad bc ive acted to tobi that im his #1 for so long.. i told him about my idol.. i tricked him into voting ahrre @ 6 so that we could vote ryan at 5 knowing he has the idol like. idk if hes gunna forgive me. LOL ALNFJBFG but its just something i need to prove at ftc ):

i jus treally dont want 3rd again. i dont think i'll get 4th. i just. want a chance to showcase my game bc i'm so fucking proud of it you have no idea like.. i've been with the majority.. i've never voted wrong. ): i've had the social. i've had the strategy. i dont know what more i could possibly do to prove that this is a winning game and the most nervewracking thing is doing a live tribal where idk how the jurors are gonna react bc half of them probably hate me and i'm legit gonna put my heart and soul into speaking my game into like 5 mins and im just scared that the jurors r gonna discredit it like ya i was a cunt alkjfhbfg but i know i played one of the best games here n idk how i'd react on call liek id probably just full on leave.. alkjfnfg

idk this is just a really long confessional bc i needed to get my feelings out there lol im just rly close and itll really suck to go home so close after controllin this game

Okay, so Im here. Yay. I knew I was getting voted and others didnt want to split votes. So im happy Ahrre didnt have an idol. So im wondering now, its final 5... have there been ANY idols?. Have we just been blindsiding them all with their idols?  Like what. So I need immunity just incase everyone but me has an idol.

So I feel like I really need to win this challenge. One because its final 5 and Idols. Two because I NEED Tobi to go this round. I brought up the idea to Scott and he said ye, but the conversation quickly ended after that, which scares me tbh. Regardless if I win or not, I am still going for Tobi, I recon he has the greatest chance of winning out of this final 5, so I need him gone. He is also good at immunities which just puts more stress on me making the finale. I think there is a chance I could win against Tobi, but there is a much better chance without him there next to me. Besides this is looking like a final 2 now, which makes my chances of getting to the end, relying on winning immunity

I WON IMMUNITY WOOO. HEHEHE

uhm. so i lost immunity. again. ALNFHBG reoccurring trend...

its cute tho. me and rhys are so similar and i love him sm and i cant wait to get to the end of this game with him hehe. :*

n then me and ryan are idolling and its like :)) yay. love him as well.

feel bad 4 tobi tho rofl

It’s Five Guys Burgers and Fries and APPARENTLY, Tobi and Ryan are targeting eachother which of course I’m like screaming with excitement on the inside because I think I’m going to beat my personal record of 5th. I might even make it to final tribal council, like I know that’s a stretch but IM SO HAPPY.

it's only day 35 huh.... we really have a final 2 HUH...... anyway yay Tobi didn't win immunity so yay we can take him out <3 Scott tells me him and Mo are under the impression i'm leaving but lol they got another thing coming. Rhys is also down to take out Tobi so whew. should be a cute moment at tribal with me n scott playing our idols but we'll see hehe

So it may be a final 3 now that I think about the days idk.

Regardless Tobi needs to go this round. Hardly anyone has started to talk which would scare me, if I didn’t have immunity. If Tobi goes this round I want to take Mo to the end. I know I can beat him then I just have to worry about Scott or Ryan.

i cant wait 2 IDOL!! i sure wont be using it successfully. bc im legit getting no votes NNNNN but. the point is. i'm here 2 stay. lol.

bye bye tobi hope u dont hate me in jury x

im so excited to use my idol and blast tobi out of this game tn.... not that i need the idol to do that exactly, but i'm excited for both hehe. it's kinda weird how this game has ended up unraveling... like, everything has gone my way pretty much and it didn't require all that much effort from me?? does that mean i played poorly omg or is that just how it be sometimes? hm. i can't say i'm 100% confident my game can earn me the win but i definitely feel like i played decently? i'm kinda sad it's probably gonna end up being a final 2 bc i wanted rhys and scott at ftc with me but oh well. i'm confirmed final 4, practically guaranteed a firemaking at least bc i dont think scott will turn on me at all and i wouldnt turn on him, so wig i have really good chances of making final 3 yayyyy. i've been thinking a lot about tribal tonight and what to say when i use the idol... i wanna make it good and impactful and send a message to the jury that hypes up my game a bit hopefully. idk we'll see if my shyness allows me to be extra lfkasd

the two truly vulnerable ppl at tonight's tribal, aka Mo and Tobi, are voting together for me instead of for each other hnnnnn i have to laugh. i think scott been playing them like a fiddle and i'm lowkey hoping they both end up really bitter at him so i can maybe win their jury vote hehe. also ugh i need to rack up at least 3 more votes so i can snatch the most votes crown from Michael... it would look better on me hm. i think i can do it if those 2 really vote me tonight and unless i dont go on an immunity run which... i wouldnt hate either

at this point i really hate luck comps this late into the game... like ugh but what can i do about it... rhys winning is better than ryan winning BUT it wouldve been nicer if me/scott/mo couldve won in case ryan pulls out an idol... we have a lot less flexibility going into tribal

So like scott has been lowkey shady lately BUT idk there really isnt much i can do about it at this point if he's blindsiding me since he has an idol and rhys has immunity soooo like its tea really... i know mo is 100% on board with voting out ryan and he asked scott and scott said ryan as well BUT it could be a lie to mo to cover up a blindside on me and like its highkey annoying that scott is the flip vote this round because he has connections and whatnot but he was also down for taking out ryan and like... taking me out at this point makes no sense because ryan making it far is sooo bad for his game LKHDLKJSA like ryan has been targetted the entire merge and he's still here... bringing that to ftc is so dangerous like i went to ftc once with someone like that... did not end well LMFAOOOO but ya this vote is extremely important and i could either be thriving with this vote or I could be royally fucked

So, tribal is in 30 minuets, Its between Tobi and Ryan? Tobi hadnt approached me about voting Ryan, so it shows I was right about wanting Tobi out. However the fact that he went to Scott over me, shows that Scott is playing a good game aswell. (Or people think me and Ryan are a duo? which ive heard before).

Tobi is voted out 3-2.

[judehayward]

lady gaga voice slowly fadin in: ju-Das juda-ah-ah… frankly i missed this ridiculous depressed little man so i’m gna try my hand at playing 2 charas again. the crowd grits their teeth in apprehensive nerves. it’s fine it’s fine it’s all FINE!!!!!!!!! also this is nai btw forgot to say. anyway. ahem. without further adieu.... his intro

he pinterest:

me in the voice of a card magician performing on the street: round up round up pick a pinterest any pinterest!

ta-da it’s aesthetics:

lead marbles instead of eyes, a stolen hearse careening down the wrong lane, wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, bags under the eyes that are so big they could pack enough clothes for a three week vacation, a cigarette wobbling from your bottom lip as you squint against the sunlight, passing out on a stranger’s rooftop, placing sunglasses over the eyes of a biology lab skeleton, gangling around the place like shaggy minus his scooby snacks, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects

about tha Bitch:

ok to start w i won’t lie i’ve pasted in an old intro here bc i just hate intros i hate writing them i hate them................. bt it’s fine.......................... lets pretend this is all fresh n sexy n new....... bsically this is jst a disclosure tht this isn’t tht well written bc it’s old n stinky bt we’re all jst having fun here. bye

he hd to do community service bc he kind of… hd a bit of a breakdown before the funeral of his elderly neighbour who bsically raised him bc her kids rly didnt care abt her they jst wanted her inheritance?? so he… stole the hearse w her casket still in it n ws jst like… drivin around the place sort of… tryin nt to cry…..KJJFHSFKJGHKFG i mean. it isnt funny its actually sad bt :/ in a very bizarre n jude way. he gt caught n taken in fr questioning bt her son kind of realised hw… broken up abt her death jude ws n had a heart n didnt press charges. regardless he stil hd to do community service bc it ws like taken seriously even tho it ws his first proper offence. doin it rly exhausted n depressed him so when he wsnt doin tht he ws just hibernatin in his room……. this ws like 2/3 months ago nw mayb bt... just some fun lore fr u all

in a new development in terms of sexuality i jst am nt quite sure……. hes always thot he ws straight… fooled around w a 90s hugh grant lookalike once n ws jst a bit like :/ my rocks rnt blasted off? bt who knows wht the future holds… who KNOWS wht the future holds ladies n gentlemen

born in sheffield in england, bt they went back and forth between there n san fran a lot jude was an unhappy accident. his parents never rly used protection bc they were super Liberal n Au Naturel n believed in the pull out method bc… they were maniacs. bt then the ONE time they used a condom in an effort to b safety conscious it broke n hence…. jude was born

they just kind of ran w it bc they had such a passionate relationship tht they were like What The Hell…. may as well! itll be fine we’ll learn to be good parents n love him like normal ppl do

spoiler alert: tht didn’t work out

they were ok to him like they weren’t abusive or anything like that bt they just found him to be a massive burden n hindrance to their plans. they literally….. had sex all day every day n acted like a pair of teenagers. it ws a super weird environment for a kid to grow up in bc he literally had no role models or… guidance or…. anything rly. occasionally they’d joke around w him or pretend they even knew what grade he was going into but for the most part they just Didn’t Care one bit

they were both suuuuper into the arts. they’re both rly good sculptors bt they paint too n they actually own a successful gallery in san fran

as a result he grew up around a lot of creative n sometimes pretentious ppl. the friends of his parents were more present in his life than his ACTUAL parents bc they were always jetting off to diff countries to scout out new pieces fr their galleries n just have a gd time in beautiful places without…. the annoyance tht ws their son forcing them to b responsible n look after someone else. tbh some of his parents friends were rly damaging too bt….i won’t go into that just yet. it doesn’t rly…need properly explaining bc jude never talks abt it anyway n it….is rather triggering so i’ll jst….leav it for now tbh fgkhdfgh. basically they just were Not Nice n jude had a lot of bad memories he keeps repressed

bc of how he ws raised he has a p cultured taste. he luvs classic lit n p much anything artsy. he can play piano 2 n sometimes gets rly high n thinks he’s mozart level gd at composing. i mean he’s gd bt… Calm Down Jude. personality wise he acts out sometimes bc he’s so frustrated. he tried rly hard to be someone his parents wld care abt by doing wild or stupid things so he’d hav funny stories to tell them n tbh sometimes it works n he gets them to laugh w him but it isn’t a parent/son bond n it never rly wil b.

he’s rly sarcastic, sleeps around a bit, has an overflowing secret sketchbook n if he cares abt someone he’ll probably draw them n get rly defensive if they find out abt it fkjgdhfkj bcos he’s an Independent Boy without a sentimental bone in his body. or so he says. at heart he is jst a very Sad Boy w lots of repressed issues like depression genuinely just does NAT giv him a single break bt he plasters over this w wise cracks n never discusses his emotions ever. he’s actually p decent or at least tries to b. he’s kind of like tht bit in superbad where michael cera gets rly drunk n makes a toast to women. tries to b? a feminist bt sometimes fucks up n offends ppl n is like dam….. my bad fr :/

he has p bad insomnia so he like never sleeps fgjkhfgjkf he always has rly sleepy eyes n rubs them tiredly mid conversation. he smokes a lot of weed to try n compensate fr this n make him tired bt he still struggles a lot

ANYWAY that aside he’s at lockwood doing fine arts. he luvs painting n photography n philosophy n all tht. a pretentious fiend sometimes? maybe_so.gif. he isn’t rly pushy abt it tho n tends to like.... take nothing seriously bt at the same time acts like he is??? like he’s very deadpan in everything he does

ummMMMMmm honestly idk i’m blankin on what else to say. ull find him smoking weed reading an american classic or gnawing at his thumbnail n getting charcoal smudges on all his clothes. wandering the streets eating frm a cereal box without care in public. he’s p broody n scruffy n he’s mostly here fr a good time. o and he’s That Guy that would die fr morrissey (his vibe not personality bc i hc jude was depressed n shut himself inside all day when he actually found out what a dick he is dfjkfhg) and all that stone roses the smiths etc stuff music wise. HMU FR PLOTS!!!!!! i’m down fr anything