#this isnt even the point of the iceberg tbh

[seven-stars-in-his-palm]

okay but hold me like you scared to sounds so good already (they all sound so good tbh but this one piqued my interest lol) what's it about? and for the fanfic questions 32, 50 and J :))

@frappe-the-peppermint WE GOT ONE 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 ahem oh wow who said that. anyway ill do the questions first then get into fic discussion…

32) Do you listen to music when you write or does music inspire you? If so, which band or genre of music does it for you?

i listen to SO MUCH MUSIC!!!!! it depends on what im wrting tbh but i just queue up a bunch of songs in my liked playlist and write and write until it ends or im no longer on that flow. and well my music taste is an absolute mess so there isnt any one definitive band or genre that does it for me (i only pay attention Sometimes) but i suppose artists like mitski and queen would be a decent summary of my taste 😅

50) How did you get into reading and/or writing fanfiction?

gravity falls, no stop. the first one that ever piqued my interest was versability (originally on ff.net me thinks) and god damn it HOOKED ME!!!! gravity falls was already getting me up but wow that just got me SO MUCH HIGHER. i have a few authors i started binge reading like thesnadger and pinesinthewoods, i started extracting fics from reccs from tumblr artists, soon discovered ao3, and never looked back. and as for writing fic,,,,, well frankly it was the search for the cure’s original form that got me GOING!!!! it originally had crappy ocs as the forefronters but i soon changed that lmao (im definitely not saying theyre bad in general, just those… no) and i wrote So Much For It on my notes app. i didnt realize i culd actually show people until way later, in which i did, and realized that it could actually be better. thats why i reversed back to part one, made the story a part two, scapped the ocs, and…now we’re here. i still love it and gravity falls, i dont really show it here anymore. i really should, man. i need to write for them again!!!! it still excites me!!!! and the prose that im weaving now,,,, id DEMOLISH THE GAME!!!!!!! :)

J) what your favorite fanfic trope? have you written it?

honestly i think just showing you my favorted ao3 tags will paint a very detailed picture. here:

though i suppose if i had to pick one here…god its between time loop and presumed dead (and grief/moruning but idk if thats a trope so much as it is a theme). MMMMMMMM. mmmmm. just YES. the psychological affects of both being a time loop and thinking someone you love is dead but they arent actually are DELICIOUS!!!!!!!!!! they are a MUST HAVE. i daydream constantly, but i havent written time loop yet because while i love it, i havent hadthe motive to write such a thing myself. reading is chill ✊ and presumed dead well i try to throw it is as much as i can, the most recent ive used being a west end town and my favorite being that one kid from jersey ! i need to do more of these fr. its just so GOOD!!!!!!

okay. its finally time for the brainwashing discussing of the fic ! i can tell you alllll about that story and it will be my pleasure sonny 🫡 its a very long story. but short verison in case you dont want to go on: its a Titanic epic . april 1912. iceberg. ive read a few that are AMAZING, but i wanted to write one that catered it allll to Me. it has lesbians, heaven sucking ass, flood parallels, and a king of the world AND draw me like one of your french girls scene. very nice 🔥

okay now its time for the long story. so a super super long time ago for a post i cant even remember (i really wanna find it 😭😭) i for someone reason went on a tangent about the titanic. i had just read this fic called sinking into the sea which was tbh VERY GOOD (and i would read it again fr fr ) but at the time, i was kinda bummed that aziraphale and crowley never actually Interacted when i had expected. aziraphale didnt even know crowley was there!!! it left me feeling melancholy, and realizing that all of the titanic fics ive ate up to that point didnt HIT hit the spot (i didnt find this after this realization, but again, theyre not even on the boat 🤧) so i was feeling a bit incomplete. i started ranting and ranting it was a wholeee wall of a text of what I would do with a titanic story and i realized oh wait i can Do Something with this because i haev free will and actual (somewhat) coherent skill. pepper jumped on the wagon, REALLY REALLY encouraged which i cant thank enough for, and….we’re here. its brewing. i had a very large interest in the titanic for a long time before this tbh, so being able to insert it into The Interest just JUMPSTARTED my brain and it still does to this day. now for the plot….

its 2020, a year after the apocalypse (no pandemic). anathema, newt, brian, crowley, and aziraphale have been assigned to plan adam’s 12th birthday party—they shenanigan, as you do. on the day of the party (adam’s birthday) anathema and newt find a chest in jasmine cottage’s attic full of titanic relics, including a pack of polaroid photos (handheld cameras did indeed exist in 1912, i checked !) which kinda might sort of have a photo of aziraphale and crowley!?!?! it was sent to them about six months before. but after the whole Second Volume fiasco, anathema just sort of wrote it off in that way and Hid It. but newt was curious, he found it, and god it was writtent his way wasnt it. (well, not by the nutter they were thinking of actually). anathema confronts them about itsoon after, and they all sit down to hear the story of the titanic in a sort of rose dawson beat. then its 1912—50ish years since the holy water incident and almost a century since the resurrectionists disaster. aziraphale has been assigned to take this trip to new york for Some Reason (we found out why later) and happened to invite crowley to come along to attempt to make amends after Allat (he really does feel bad, but he will NOT do the holy water thing yet </3) shit occurs, but history atlarge will not be rewritten. it does change their story, though. adding a sprinkle of interest in the device family line. agnes prophec(y)(ies), dancing on deck under the stars, playing cards with humans and winning by a Lot, aziraphale’s artistic skills are put to use at one point—ughghgufhits just so DEAR TO ME!!!!! and of course the conflict will come later, especially considering the religious connections to the titanic sinking—“not even God can sink this ship” type conversation 🥰 aziraphale can and will be made uncomfortable. its for the character development dont worry about it. i even have a playlist for this fic (it sorted by the way the tone shifts thru the story, some songs are silly but they had to stay). pep has also made some song covers to some of the songs that ive heavily connected to the fic and I REALLY FUCKING LIKED. LIKE A LOT. THEYRE AMAZING YOU SHOULD LISTEN IF YOU WANT TO!!!!

the point of all this is that i like titanic fics and im trying to throw my hat in the ring even if its just for me and my friend 🔥🔥 because while others have fed me, i havent seen ones that have documented like Every Single Day on the titanic that aziraphale and crowley would theoretically have as well as developing aziraphale and crowley’s relationship while taking into account whats happened before (insert the story into a part of the timeline seamlessly i think thats how i’d describe) AS WELL AS connecting the reason why the titanic was such a freak tragedy and how the world is not fucking fair instead of just “oh whoops the thing sank 😞” i want NITTY GRITTY DETAIL!!!!!! I WANT GUILT!!!!!!! I WANT CHAOS!!!!!!!! I WANT TALKING ABOUT GOD!!!!!!! I WANT AZIRAPHALE IN A MENTAL CRISIS!!!!! I WANT CROWLEY JUST WANTING TO FUCKING LIVE FUCKING PEACEFULLY!!!!!!! I WANT LESBIANS!!!!!! i need to get on this,,,, so much to do. i love it all and TY FOR THE ASK!!!!

[dahllias]

               # CAPÍTULO UNO:  A HATED CHILD.

so there it was, i was alive. i had survived. 

              no one saved me, 

                                               because i saved myself. 

( TW: mención de abuso físico, tortura, maltrato infantil, muerte. )

domingo. los santos días, una bendición para muchos. ser bañados en el lago visto como un privilegio dado para aquellos que no dudan de las normas divinas. lago que contenía agua sagrada, donde los adultos veneraban a otro ser viviente a cambio de milagros. pequeña hacienda, rodeada de rostros poco familiares, consideraba el agua como algo divino. 

el abrir los ojos, el alejarse de la utopía que vivían sus padres, le hizo darse cuenta que esa agua bendita por la que sus padres se desvivían estaba llena de sangre de incontables personas que no conocían otra realidad. pensamiento crítico, curiosidad insaciable, le hace cuestionar su mundo, ¿por qué algo que se consideraba un orgullo para su familia se sentía tan mal? libros eran el portal que la guiaba a otras reglas, otra sociedad, otra forma de vida que no había conocido nunca. había aprendido otra historia, ellos habían colocado una gríngola sobre sus ojos. una única verdad, un único dios.  

el romper las reglas; el romper las reglas de sociedad significaba un castigo. el revelarse frente a divinas figuras, idolatradas por todos, significaba ganarse el odio de todos. propios padres la ofrecen, un castigo apto para aquellos que osaban a ir en contra de los juramentos. ¿la peor parte? las lágrimas que tenía su madre en sus ojos no eran por lo que le sucedería, su madre estaba apenada de sus acciones. ¿su crimen? algo tan simple como averiguar que esa religión no era la única en todo el mundo, libro en sus pequeñas manos abriéndole los ojos al mundo. 

quince días, quince días viajando hasta el lago, donde los líderes ejecutaban un ritual de castigo. hundiéndo su cabeza en el agua por lo que se sentía como una eternidad, crear heridas en su torso y así poder crear evidencia de que había sido maldecida. los adultos, cegados por estas personas, les creen. convirtiéndola en una aberración, creando que la población estuviese de acuerdo de aquella tortura, inclusive sus progenitores. todavía puede escuchar sus risas, puede sentir sus manos alrededor de su cuello. sumergirse en el lago de agua bendita, mientras el resto observa, sus padres aprueban y ella grita, rogando por ayuda. ahí fue cuando se dio cuenta que estaba sola, que nadie llegaría a su salvación. después de cuatro días dejó de luchar, dejaba que sus grandes manos colocaran su cara debajo del agua hasta quedar desmayada por la falta de respiración.  

“   ¡joder! creo que ahora sí, la perdimos.   ”    comenta el profeta predilecto, aquel por el que rezaba cada noche, aquel que sus padres idolatraban. este no era benevolente, no solventaba ninguna enfermedad mortal. este se reía de ella, repartiendo cachetadas sobre sus cachetes intentando reanimar a la pequeña que había perdido sus ganas de luchar.  “   sus padres son los que más dinero le dan a la organización, una lástimas.   ”

para su mala suerte esta despierta después de , sin emociones ni la chispa en sus ojos. quince años, sólo tenía quince años cuando perdió la habilidad de sentir algo. sus padres la odiaban, por convertirlos en el hazmerreír del pueblo, por haber hecho enojar a su líder. la echaron de casa, la miraban con tanto odio que comezaba a dudar que esa pareja fue quiénes la criaron durante toda su vida. 

el agua se convierte en su peor enemigo, en su pesadilla, cada vez que siente que el agua pasa sobre su torso puede recordar el sinfin de maltratos. puede sentir cicatrices ardiendo sobre sus muñecas, sobre su espalda y talones. sobretodo, recuerda quiénes le quitaron a sus padres, quiénes la tacharon de maldita frente a todos los demás ganando el rechazo del único mundo que conocía. el agua que la había visto morir una vez también la había visto revivir. 

no era la primera en sobrevivir, tampoco la primera en morir en aquel lago, en manos de aquellos hombres quiénes se aprovechaban de personas que buscaban milagros y ellos se lo prometían. miedo irracional la paraliza de detener otro ritual de castigo; era inhumano. con el tiempo, entiende que era realizado en cualquiera que se atreviera a desafiar sus palabras. sacrificios que eran realizados para dormir a los habitantes, que no se atrevan a dejarlos o tendrán el mismo destino que las niñas marcadas por la bestia. 

[kazo0-boy]

WARNING: Talk of mental illness, trauma, suicide, PTSD, solitary confinement, torture, generally dark topics, talking about c!dream in a somewhat sympathetic light

honestly idk what this is. it had a point somewhere but it just devolved into my thoughts on c!Dream. i also wrote half of it while dissociating oops

gonna put a disclaimer first: I am in no way trying to excuse any of c!Dream’s actions. he’s done tons or horrible things. this is just an analysis post from the perspective of him being mentally ill and flawed and the effect the prison would have on him, and what i think should have been done instead. Also, this is a fictional character.

This is something i’ve been wanting to put into words for awhile but haven’t really gotten to until now, but honestly as someone who has struggled with mental illness for most of their life and been in toxic mindsets I can’t help but sympathize with c!Dream in that it’s very clear to me that he isn’t just evil for the sake of being evil, but he is also a character that has gone with untreated mental illness and no proper support system that has resulted in him spiraling into the toxic mindset and abusive behaviors that we see him with now.

Nobody just goes into a spiral of cutting everyone and everything important to them off in order for them to have no chance to hurt or be used against him out of nowhere, developing unhealthy obsessions with power and control, attributing having attachments to displaying weakness, ect.. He’d have to have been struggling for a while to get to that point. There’s no way in heck that happened without a lot of internal struggle. Tbh i think what we saw with him snapping at Tommy for using Spirit’s leather against him was only the tip of the iceberg. We didn’t see any of his internal thoughts or descent but we did see the breaking point that led to his downfall. And he just kept getting worse from there. 

do i think his actions are justified? no. he’s done a lot of unforgivable things that cannot be excused with any explanation and that’s not what i’m trying to do. can i see what state of mind would lead him into the place he’s at now? yes. just like every other character on the server, he is someone with complex actions and motivations that go beyond just being evil for the sake of being evil.

do i think he should be in the prison? no. now before you write me off let me explain why. NOBODY should be in the prison because it is inhumane and designed to break the prisoner’s spirit rather than contain and rehabilitate them for the safety of the server. It’s more of a torture chamber than a prison honestly. And being in it is clearly not helping c!Dream at all and traumatizing him more than anything. He’s mentioned that he doesn’t get full meals (during Bad’s visit, he asked if he gets 3 full meals a day and Dream brushes off the question) and what he does get is barely anything. Essentially starvation. The original prison plans were for the prisoner to also be able to leave the cell and go into a courtyard and such for ‘enrichment’ but neither Sam nor Dream has mentioned that. So as far as we know he’s been stuck in his cell the entire time with almost nothing to do. So essentially solitary confinement with a touch of starvation and isolation (people rarely visiting him, visitation being taken away as a punishment, ect) plus more for an extended period of time is a recipe for disaster (this is the only time i’m gonna mention specifics but i can see this resulting in specifically C-PTSD among who knows what else, as unlike simple PTSD it is caused by multiple traumatic events for an extended period of time. things like childhood abuse or being held captive for an extended period of time, and there have been cases where solitary confinement has caused it so he could easily end up suffering from it). I’ve seen people make the point that ‘oh well he was gonna put Tommy in there so he deserves it.’ that’s not the point. the point is that NOBODY should be in the prison. It should have never been built in the first place. any character that would go in would come out with serious trauma therefore it’s inhumane.  Plus, how is Dream going to ever become a better person in that kind of environment? Isn’t that what a prison should be aiming to do? 

Even if he hasn’t entirely broken yet, as he still shows hope of getting out or fighting back it’s inevitable that he is going to. We’re already seeing the beginnings of it in the form of self-destructive behavior like burning his clock and killing himself in lava (basically suicide). As time goes on its only going to get worse and worse. and even in the off-chance that he’s doing those as some kind of attempt at manipulation, the fact that he’s willing to go as far as to do serious harm to himself is seriously seriously concerning

So what do i think should have been done instead? first off, get this man some therapy. get EVERYONE some therapy. he’s no less deserving of getting help than anyone else. Second, put him in an actual prison that isnt a literal torture chamber, that will give him consequences for his actions properly without dehumanizing him and taking away any chance at recovery?

so uh, yeah. theres my 2am dissociative trigger-enduced rant on c!Dream over. i cant believe i wrote an entire essay on a minecraft roleplay

[fmstevie]

              *    ╰              waddup   y’all   ruby’s   back   2   annoy   u   all   w   a   lil   british   fuckboi   action   .   here’s   stevie   ,   inspired   by   matty   healy   n   thinkin   she’s   a   god   among   men   .   i   don’t   recommend   u   read   on   but   in   case   u   do   i   pray   u   forgive   me   enough   2   want   plots   w   that   like   button   .   🤡

                new   york’s   very   own      𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐄   ‘   𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐘   ’   𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐘𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐄            was   spotted   on   broadway   street   in   doc   marten   smooth   leather   chelsea   boots      .   your   resemblance   to   diana   silvers   is   unreal   .   according   to   tmz   ,   you   just   had   your   twenty   -   second      birthday   bash   .   while   living   in   nyc   ,   you’ve   been   labeled   as   being         𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐬   ,   but   also   𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞   .   i   guess   being   a   cancer      explains   that   .   3   things   that   would   paint   a   better   picture   of   you   would   be      erudite   inclinations   informed   by   a   god   complex   ,      melodrama   as   your   magnum   opus   ,   &   the   world’s   most   secretive   love   life         .               (   i   had   a   secret   marriage   that   lasted   6   months   but   ended   due   to   my   fear   of   my   family’s   mafia   ties   getting   in   the   way   .         )      &      (   cis   female   &   she   /   her      )

𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆      :      stephanie   charlotte   greystone 𝒏𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆𝒔      :            primarily   stevie   ,   although   her   stage   name   is   ‘   grey   ‘   which   has   caught   on   as   a   go-to   nickname   .   takes   little   to   nothing   else   wilingly 𝒂𝒈𝒆      :            twenty   -   two 𝒛𝒐𝒅𝒊𝒂𝒄      :      cancer    𝒐𝒄𝒄𝒖𝒑𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏      :      professional   musician   with   a   voiceclaim   of   lorde   ,   on   temporary   hiatus   to   write   grey3   .   casual   photographer 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓      𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒕𝒚      /      𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒔      :      cis      female      /      she      her      hers 𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏      :      pansexual   w   strong   female   pref   but   tbh   if   u   can   handle   her   energy   she’ll   b   down   WKERWJER 𝒉𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕      :      5’10  🤤 𝒍𝒂𝒃𝒆𝒍𝒔      :      the   hedonist   ,         the      aesthete      ,      the      opaque   ,      the      vainglorious      ,      the      prodigy      ,      the      intangible   concept       𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒈      𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒔      :      rhiannon      -      fleetwood   mac      /      WHAT   U   CALL   THAT      -      chase   atlantic    /      iceberg      -      borns      /      UGH      -         the      1975     /      boss   bitch      -      doja   cat      /      elephant      -      tame   impala     /      black   hole   sun      -      soundgarden      /      black   madonna      -      cage   the   elephant      /         this   charming   man      -      the   smiths     /      swim      -      chase   atlantic      /      1999   WILDFIRE         -      brockhampton

tw      drug   mention

𝒊.  𝒅𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏.

there   is   perhaps   no   more   a   formidable   surname   in   the   organized   crime   circuit   in   all   of   europe   than   greystone   ,   a   name   risen   to   fame   through   countless   court   cases   and   highly   publicized   trials   .   dubbed   ‘   el   chapo   of   the   old   world   ,   ‘   liam   greystone   makes   his   reputation   known   as   a   ruthless   and   conniving   leader   of   a   million   dollar   cartel   business   ,   distributing   to   most   of   the   UK   and   eastern   europe   .   it’s   perhaps   an   even   greater   shock   to   find   even   as   public   enemy   #1   ,   he   takes   a   welsh   wife   by   the   name   of   marissa   and   weds   her   in   a   lavish   and   very   public   ceremony   ,   surmounting   crowds   not   unlike   those   of   the   royal   weddings   .   such   a   decision   is   a   clear   power   move   on   his   part   ,   flexing   the   pure   influence   it   would   require   to   have   such   a   public   family   life   with   no   fear   of   repercussion   from   rivals   or   enemies   .   

it’s   several   months   following   their   wedding   that   james   is   born   ,   with   nicholas   taking   a   few   years   after   .   elite   prep   schools   in   the   most   posh   london   neighborhoods   were   abuzz   with   equal   parts   curiosity   and   concern   to   be   sharing   streets   with   the   most   feared   mafia   family   in   their   whole   country   ,   though   the   elite   nature   of   liam’s   new   societal   presence   meant   he   took   to   his   ‘   dealings   ‘   with   a   but   more   subtlety   than   before   his   rise   to   power   .   something   of   a   media   frenzy   ,   it’s   the   talk   of   the   town   when   marissa   falls   pregnant   another   time   ,   nearly   a   decade   after   nicholas’s   birth   ,   this   time   with   a   baby   girl   ,   something   that’s   all   the   sun   and   mirror   can   seem   to   post   about   in   their   celebrity   tabloids   section   for   weeks   on   end   .   her   birth   raises   questions   of   immense   speculation   :   what   will   the   world   do   with   a   greystone   girl   ?

as   it   would   result   ,   they’d   worship   her   .   stevie   found   herself   raised   in   a   world   that   sought   her   out   at   every   turn   ,   cameras   pointed   towards   her   at   every   outing   .   james   and   nick   ,   now   teens   by   the   time   she   enters   primary   and   just   as   big   of   terrors   as   their   father   ,   view   their   lavish   lifestyle   as   the   result   of   some   bigger   destiny   for   greatness   ,   as   their   father   had   always   fed   to   them   ,   something   they   passed   on   to   their   baby   sister   who   took   it   as   her   mantra   .   one   of   the  ��earliest   manifestations   of   a   rather   intense   personality   ,   stevie   takes   this   to   an   extreme   ,   turning   her   unwanted   stardom   into   a   fuel   for   an   ever-increasing   god   complex   to   develop   .   the   apple   of   her   father’s   eye   and   every   bit   as   quick   ,   her   instructors   note   a   dedication   to   perfection   and   an   obsession   with   accomplishment   ,   along   with   a   natural   intelligence   that   leads   her   to   blast   through   her   studies   with   relative   ease   .   

she’s   just   16   when   she   completes   her   schooling   and   already   has   a   reputation   that   will   precede   her   ,   just   as   her   surname   had   before   .   relaxed   and   observant   ,   her   voice   never   peaks   higher   than   a   low   alto   with   her   charming   londoner   drawl   ,   a   facade   never   cracking   from   her   knowing   poker   face   .   there’s   something   about   being   so   above   everyone   (   even   if   it   is   a   self-imposed   superiority   )   that   leads   stevie   all   but   to   the   brink   of   isolation   ,   finding   solace   only   in   the   words   of   a   self-deluded   father   and   her   own   scribings   in   a   leather   bound   notebook   .   piano   lessons   since   early   childhood   lend   themselves   to   melodies   following   melodies   ,   and   before   she’s   even   able   to   legally   drink   ,   she’s   released   her   first   album   under   the   moniker   ‘   grey   ’   titling   it   pure   heroine   as   a   cheeky   nod   to   the   inevitable   accusations   of   it   being   her   family   ties   that   got   her   a   record   deal   .   but   as   streams   of   the   melancholy   tunes   begin   to   pick   up   fans   worldwide   ,   the   album’s   themes   of   isolation   ,   abandonment   ,   and   wasted   youth   hit   harder   than   ever   anticipated   from   the   youngest   greystone   .   she   leaves   home   to   tour   the   world   with   the   album   reaching   #1   in   countless   countries   ,   forging   her   own   path   with   a   maturity   beyond   her   years   and   a   vision   beyond   this   world   .   

    the   tour   ends   and   she’s   smitten   by   the   charm   of   new   york   ,   opting   to   move   to   continue   to   pursue   her   music   away   from   the   tangled   complications   of   family   life   in   england   .   barely   18   and   perhaps   intoxicated   with   the   loneliness   of   a   life   spent   in   the   watching   eye   of   others   ,   the   semblance   of   privacy   is   something   she   takes   to   like   an   addict   ,   exasperating   prying   paparazzi   with   her   notorious   refusal   to   comment   on   details   of   her   personal   life   .   she   builds   a   wall   between   herself   and   the   world   ,   keeping   out   prying   eyes   with   a   tight   -   lipped   grin   .   its   at   this   time   that   she   lets   the   first   person   into   her   life   perhaps   ever   ,   a   whirlwind   romance   so   intoxicating   it   results   in   a   courthouse   marriage   done   in   secret   .   never   to   be   seen   together   ,   never   a   word   spoken   to   anyone   else   ,   stevie   relishes   in   the   secret   which   is   soon   to   sour   upon   the   passing   of   their   honeymoon   phase   .   with   her   brothers   expanding   their   reach   into   the   US   for   their   unsavory   dealings   ,   it’s   not   long   after   her   marriage   begins   that   the   conflicts   reach   a   breaking   point   ,   an   annulment   following   barely   6   months   after   they   had   traded   ‘   i   do’s   .   ’

she   takes   to   the   studio   with   a   new   resentment   of   the   concept   of   love   and   even   more   sequestered   heart   ,   producing   melodrama   which   takes   the   world   by   storm   ,   snagging   her   a   grammy   win   for   album   of   the   year   .   fatigued   from   the   constant   go-around   of   keeping   her   secrets   her   own   except   for   when   they’re   taken   to   radio   streams   ,   she   does   a   limited   tour   for   melodrama   and   lands   herself   right   back   in   new   york   at   20   ,   putting   grey3   on   the   backburner   as   she   takes   to   all   the   hedonistic   engagements   she   had   indulged   herself   in   during   her   time   on   tour   .   she’s   kept   herself   busy   between   mindless   flings   and   days-long   benders   with   hobbies   such   as   photography   and   writing   ,   the   former   of   which   is   building   her   a   rather   impressive   reputation   in   the   arts   world   .   

𝒊𝒊.  𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆 .

if   y’all   ain’t   tired   of   me   yet   god   bless   u   .   ..   .   bc   i   straight   up   b   tired   of   myself   :/

anyways   dis   is   stevie   ,   also   accepts   grey   the   same   way   ppl   talk   abt   lorde   n   switch   between   ella   n   lorde   !   she’s   not   picky   :~)

major   inspos   are   matty   healy   from   the   1975   n   hayley   kiyoko   if   she   was   less   of   a   try   hard   .   little   bit   of   kristen   stewart   in   there   ,   big   2016   ruby   rose   energy   n   brie   larson   top   me   tomfoolery   as   well   !   

basically   da   fuckboi   of   ur   dreams   ..      ..   .   lil   devilish   londoner   who   stays   thinkin   she’s   the   closest   thing   to   a   god   on   this   green   earth   !

notably   ,   she’s   incredibly   intelligent   and   profound   ,   tends   to   take   on   a   rather   patronizing   and   condescending   tone   bc   she   straight   up   b   thinkin   she’s   usually   the   smartest   person   in   the   room   (   how   annoying   )

so   laid   back   n   observant   ,   rlly   has   no   need   to   raise   her   voice   ever   bc   her   arguments   b   runnin   circles   around   ppl   !   imagine   the   way   harry   styles   talks   low   n   slow   n   calculated.   .   .   .   .   cameron   from   love   is   blind   ,.   ..   .      kristen   stewart   lowkey   sometimes   ..   ..   ..   das   grey   .    sexy   ass   alto   monotone  🤤🤤

i   dont   wanna   use   chaotic   bc   she   rlly   isnt   the   WILDEST   bitch   but   that   god   complex   means   she   deadass   thinks   she   can   get   away   w   what   she   wants   n   she   usually   does   ?   less   of   a   chaotic   evil   n   more   like   a   neutral   evil   lmao   she   can   follow   rules   just   fine   she   jsut   prefers   whatever   suits   her   better

on   that   note   —   OBSCENELY   self   obsessed   .   follows   her   own   natural   whims   n   impulses   bc   that’s   just   what   appeals   to   her   .   is   inclined   to   follow   rules   if   she   calculates   itll   work   in   her   favor   bc   she   also   doesn’t   like   to   look   sloppy   !

super   secretive   and   OBSESSED   w   her   presentation   .   every   movement   is   calculated   n   she   doesnt   want   anyone   seeing   a   side   of   her   that   she   hasn’t   designated   for   them   !   she   doesn’t   care   what   other   ppl   think   but   she   DOES   care   abt   what   she   sees   herself   doing   n   her   vision   .   doesnt   fit   the   vision   ?   will   NOT   happen   in   her   book   .

straight   up   a   WHORRE   lmao   she   likes   2   fill   the   void   left   by   a   lack   of   human   connection   w   sexual   intimacy   n   then   is   like   nice   imma   have   u   leave   now   love   LMAO   .   does   not   discriminate   and   is   rlly   inclined   to   follow   any   sexual   impulse

this   was   implied   but   her   relationships   are   super   messy   ?   does   the   leonardo   dicaprio   thing   where   she   will   never   fuckin   discuss   her   love   life   in   interviews   or   anything   so   ppl   just   gotta   SPECULATE   .   she   lets   ppl   post   all   they   want   abt   her   but   she   wont   say   a   WORD   abt   them   JWHEKJWH   her   socials   r   basically   just   abt   her   n   her   music   we   said   SELFISH   lads   .   she’s   bad   @   bein   tied   down   n   is   probs   polyamorous   as   it   stands   but   im   p   sure   she   has   cheated   on   every   single   person   she   has   ever   been   with   lmao

lowkey   a   shit   friend   most   of   the   time   lMAO   she   can   b   really   unreliable   bc   u   guys   can   have   plans   n   then   she   takes   someone   home   n   misses   yalls   plans   n   then   texts   u   4   hours   later   after   all   ur   missed   calls   n   is   like   my   bad   bruv   i   got   tied   up   AS   IF   THAT   FIXES   IT   KWEJKWJEKWE

chain   smoker   n   its   nastie   but   lowkey   sexy   somehow   :/  ,   will   ONLY   wear   outfits   that   r   equal   parts   thrifted   n   designer   ,   always   has   her   hands   in   her   pockets   n   if   her   jacket   has   a   hood   its   UP   like   a   big   ole   homo   ,   is   rlly   annoying   bc   shes   good   looking   n   KNOWS   it   so   she   uses   it   to   her   advantage   ,   wants   2   get   her   motorcycle   license   ,   judges   u   based   off   the   music   u   play   in   the   car   ,   judges   u   on   everything   tbh.

[utapribr]

I never played the games and I saw yesterday that Otoya's father is actually Shining (yeah I'm very late in the news), I'm shocked lmao do you know if the games have other important info the anime didn't show?

Oh my, where do I even start… Tbh, the anime is the tip of the iceberg of what Utapri has to offer, plot-wise. Really, the games have lots of content and potential even if Broccol doesn’t explore it but lol what can we do. I highly suggest you to look up some reviews of the game routes so that you can get the most of it, details etc, it’s really interesting. Overall, I’ll just throw the basics under the Read More ^^

Otoya - One of the charas with the most complicated story arc that Broccoli forgets to bring up even though everyone is interested in. His mom (Kotomi) is a composer, just like Haruka, and she used to be Shining’s partner (music and love-wise), but when he had to choose over career or love, he chose career and left her. He didn’t know that she was pregnant though, so she had a son (Otoya) on her own. She suffered a plane crash though, and everyone assumed she was dead. He was raised by his aunt until she died and he went on an orphanage. In the games, he lowkey knows that Shining is his dad, but he doesn’t talk to him about it (I wouldn’t either lol tbh Shining is an ass for knowing that Otoya is his son later and still leaving him on an orphanage when he could be raising the boy but ok).

Cecil - Yeah, so you know the thing about the plane crash and everyone assuming Kotomi was dead? Well, turns out she wasn’t! She actually ended up in Agnapolis, but suffered amnesia and forgot everything. The king and her eventually fell in love with each other and then they had Cecil (yes, he’s Otoya’s half bro). However, ppl in the island were xenophobic af and hated japanese people, so Kotomi went back to Japan to avoid those weirdos who wanted her away (or dead), but Cesshi stayed bc he’s the heir after all. But his uncles or smth didn’t consider him a true heir bc he’s half-japanese, so they turned him into a cat with a magic spell and sent him back to Japan :/ There he met Haruka and her songs brought him back to human form again :) which means he’s still the heir lol @ his relatives try harder.

Masa - basically his mom was weak on health when he was younger, and he had to take care of everything, including his little sister Mai (she’s cute and he makes stuffed animals to her from time to time as gifts even after becoming an idol). His dad is a bitch on the games OK. That servant that appeared, Jii - everyone who played the games hates him. To represent my feelings on him while playing Repeat, I made this little art piece hope u appreciate:

In the anime Mai pretty much disappeared, but in the games she’s still there, so she’s the reason why Masa is still avoiding his dad and the duty of becoming the heir, because he knows he can’t get disowned, since his sister will be the next in the line and forced to do things bc of that. He loves her a lot, so this is why he doesn’t do it.

Natsuki - If I remember well, he was raised in France until he was 5?? My memory on this is kinda bad. His parents have a farm and this explains why he loves animals so much. His arc was Satsuki, and once he disappeared, everything became a filler (which is very sad, he’s such a good chara;;). Also he and Syo didn’t know each other when they were kids.

Tokiya - Ok so I know many Tokiya stans are super hardcore and know every little thing about him, so if I mess up I’m really sorry ;_; my memory isnt that good ok, but I’ll try my best. Tokiya’s dad never liked the idea of him becoming an idol, and when he decided to continue to go after his dream, his dad left him and his mom. He and Shining knew each other before bc they worked together on something that I forgot rn, while he was HAYATO. Shining noticed that he felt very unhappy and offered him help (and a chocolate cake, which was cute). Tokiya denied until he broke down and admitted that his life was shit, so Shining helped him.

Ren - Tbh his story isn’t much different from the anime and what it said. He’s the 3rd son, feels useless, he and Masa knew each other since they were kids, etc. Oh, and he doesn’t like chocolates. Since he was born on Valentine’s Day, everyone offered him chocolate to the point that he couldn’t stand it anymore, because he felt that he had to eat every chocolate that ppl offered in gratitude lol. He does like bitter chocolate though.

Syo - @ anime when will you quit playing games with us and BRING KAORU TO THE ANIME BYE. Ok so he has a twin brother (mentioned in the anime). What the anime doesn’t mention is that he has a heart condition, and if he gets too excited and stuff, his heart starts to freak out. Doctors didn’t even expect him to survive past 10yo or something. He hated himself for being so weak and short, but seeing Ryuuya on TV motivated him. He started learning how to fight and decided to become an idol to get closer to him. He survived past doctors’ expectations, despite of the odds. Kaoru studies medicine bc he wants to be a doctor and help Syo, and people in the same condition. Kaoru also feels kinda guilty for being healthier and taller despite being the youngest twin. Their father is a stylist in Shining’s Agency, and their mother is an orchestra conductor if I’m not mistaken. His heart condition was healed in Utapri Repeat through a surgery.

Reiji - has sister and mom, and they own a restaurant. Studied at Shining Academy like the members above ^^^. While he was there, he met Aine and 2 other guys, and they became friends. Reiji debuted with one of the friends as his composer, and Aine debuted with the other. They both became idols, but Aine fell in depression over the idol life, feeling lonely and empty, to the point where he tried to commit suicide. His last call was directed to Reiji, but he was busy working and didn’t answer. Aine was never seen again and assumed dead, so Reiji blames himself to this day. Their other 2 friends also blame him. He may look happy and all, but it’s pretty much a facade and he feels bad about it to this day.

Ranmaru - He used to be part of the Rich Kids Club™ with Ren and Masa, but his dad was betrayed and his family became bankrupt. His dad died because of stress, but Ranmaru assumed the debts in his place and worked his ass off to pay it. Since most of the bands he was in disbanded bc of girls, he’s kinda bitchy with females at first. Really likes cats. His hair is dyed and he uses a contact lenses to make one of his eyes to seem purple. 

Ai - Hey, do you remember that Aine story? Turns out Aine didn’t die either! (never trust deaths in Utapri) He was saved from drowning by his uncle, but he got in coma. His uncle, a doctor/scientist, discovered that he refused to wake up because he was scared of the world and scared of feelings/love. His uncle then creates an android (Ai or A.I.) and connected their emotions. This way, Ai could discover more about the world and feelings, and show Aine that the world wasn’t that bad. Their voices and appearance are the same (poor Reiji), but they’re completely different people. Through music, Ai managed to wake up Aine, but freaked out later that he wouldn’t be useful anymore. The uncle/doctor reassured him that he was important and never meant as a replacement. So basically Aine is alive in Ai’s route, but not in Reiji’s route, and we may never even see him bc Broccoli is the best and wasting potential.

Camus - a count just like he loves to say. Serves the Silk Queen and really cares for her. Didn’t really have a childhood bc of training day and night to serve the queen, and his own family is full of his enemies, one trying to take down the other. His horse can be turned into a dog as well (named Alexander). He was sent to spy on Shining and to see if he could find some way to get magic and boost his queen’s magic bc it was almost gone. Cesshi almost married the queen bc.. Well, the queen needed magic and he had the muses, plus those bitches on Agnapolis wanted Cesshi away, so they arranged a marriage, but since Camus managed to get some magic (Haruka’s songs wow), it didn’t happen. He knows about Ranmaru’s past btw, and knows about the whole Shining-Kotomi thing (Silk Quen knows about it too).

THIS ACTUALLY BECAME LONGER THAN EXPECTED OMG IM SORRY but really this is still not everything and there’s a lot more to explore from Utapri and the games/Drama CDs. Hope this helps you anyway!