#this is where 'if you'll excuse the pun' comes in

[nofomogirl]

We need to talk about body snatching

I'm not a massive fan of the 1827 minisode - if you're curious why it bothers me, I've explained it in my post about two GO canons - but there's no denying it does an amazing job at exploring the complexity of morality and moral choices. It starts with a very black-and-white two-dimensional image and gradually adds shading and perspective, making it harder and harder to judge as we go along.

I think it's worth digging into (pun not intended but I'll take it).

Layer 1: body snatching bad

We learn someone did something

It's those first few seconds where we see a person robbing a grave, and since we know that robbing graves is a crime and generally not a good thing to do, we can quickly form a tentative conclusion that this is wrong.

Okay, in this exact instance, we immediately get enough context clues to see that this kind of judgment would be oversimplistic and superficial. Only Aziraphale, who for some reason acts as if it was his first day on Earth after a thorough memory wipe, is ready to condemn Elspeth based on just that.

Nevertheless, this is the first layer - the deed itself with no context.

Layer 2: body snatching acceptable

We learn about the person who did the thing

That's the whole journey with the first dug-up body where we get to know Elspeth and become privy to her circumstances - she's desperately poor, she has another person depending on her, she robs graves to survive. Aziraphale's suggestions that she might earn her living by selling books, weaving or farming just serve to prove how inaccessible more honest and dignified professions are to her. In turn, her comment about how she's not hurting anybody who isn't already dead hints that from the realistically available options, Elspeth could have chosen something much worse.

Technically this layer is a significant step up from layer 1 but it still isn't really challenging. Things are spelt out really loud for us, and most importantly everything we learn about Elspeth is just attenuating circumstances. To top it off both she and Wee Morag are immediately endearing. The takeaway is that sometimes things that in theory are bad can be excused which is important but the verdict still comes without any second thoughts.

Layer 3: body snatching complicated

We learn the larger context around the thing

This mostly happens when Aziraphale and Crowley discuss body snatching with Mr Dalrymple. We learn that the stolen corpses are used for a medical study that can advance human knowledge and make it possible to save living people and that surgeons have no legal means to obtain enough of them for their research - hence their need to buy them from body snatchers.

At first glance it's just more of what we got in layer 2 - more agruments in favour of body snatching that aren't all that nuanced and don't really give us any pause - just from a larger perspective, beyond Elspeth's individual experience. But if you glance more than once you'll notice this is when things stop being straightforward and easy to judge.

The moment we enter a proper grey area is when Aziraphale asks why Mr Dalrymple doesn't acquire the bodies himself. This is a very valid question - while we might easily agree that studying the human body to further medical knowledge is a good thing, and with just the slightest hesitation admit that it's acceptable to resort to using stolen bodies if that is the only way the research may continue, it's not as easy to excuse taking advantage of the poor and the desperate to do the actual stealing that we know is very dangerous.

The moment we know without a doubt we are in a proper grey area is when Mr Dalrymple laughs at Aziraphale's concern.

Objectively, the surgeon is right that it's more effective if he doesn't risk his own life in the graveyard and uses his time on actual research, teaching students and saving lives. But it's also clear he doesn't exactly see people like Elspeth as actual human beings and feels he has every right to use them. On the one hand, he is paying, on the other, he happily benefits from the cruel class system and is not even one bit remorseful about it. On the one hand, he takes risks too, on the other he has a chance of rewards Elspeth will not benefit from. It's not the poorest whose lives will get bettered by the progress of medicine, even though they're the ones who pay with their lives for that progress. And if Mr Dalrymple gets lucky and is knighted for his work (we know he wasn't in the end but it was a possibility), the poor still won't be pardoned for stealing for him. Nevertheless, he has no issue with that.

As I said, things get nuanced.

Layer 4: it's different when it's someone you know

The thing actually happens in your life

I think you'll all agree that the turning point of the minisode is when Elspeth decides to sell Wee Morag's still warm body. This is what finally leaves us speechless.

That's because up until now we've been approaching the issue intellectually. It's not that we didn't care about the characters, but we were allowed to keep a safe distance. The whole thing was like a problem to be solved - "Is body snatching right or wrong? Discuss in 500-1000 words" - and everything we've learned so far was data for this assignment. I believe that one of the reasons why this detachment came naturally was that there was a very thick line between people involved in body snatching and the bodies that were being snatched. The former were, well, people, obviously. The latter were inanimate objects.

It isn't until Wee Morag is to be sold that we are forced to see a person in a dead body. This is also when real emotions enter the equation.

This shift forces us to question our judgment for the first time. It was easy to justify Elspeth when she was selling a nameless corpse. But the fact that she decided to sell her closest companion - and most likely lover - shocks us. Something inside us strongly objects to how quickly she makes the decision.

And then there's the transaction, and it is also different when it's someone we know. The fact that we knew Wee Morag fully exposes Mr Dalrymple for the heartless jerk that he is. The way he treats Elspeth is the absolute worst and if you haven't realized he was a hypocrite earlier, you should be disillusioned by now.

But at least Elspeth is not a hypocrite, right? It may seem cold that she sold Wee Morag but it just proves she simply believed it's all right to sell a dead body, doesn't it?

Well, about that...

Layer 5: it's different when it's you

You are forced to face the thing happening to you

This layer is reached when Elspeth plans her suicide and asks Aziraphale and Crowley to bury her "somewhere where no ghouls will ever dig her back up again".

It turns out Elspeth McKinnon really was a filthy liar.

Not long ago she was insisting that body snatching doesn't hurt anyone who isn't already dead, and asking why she should let Wee Morag rot in the ground when she starves. But she wants to make sure it doesn't happen to her own body. The idea that someone might dig her up terrifies her and she calls people who do it ghouls. So why was digging up other people okay again? Why should she rot in the ground while other people suffer? There were other people living in the street where she and Wee Morag hid. Why not ask Aziraphale to give the money to them? Or just anybody in need? Why not ask to sell her body as well and use the earnings the same way?

Also, if you look at it from a certain perspective, Elspeth betrayed Wee Morag in the worst possible way. Wee Morag believed that if someone's body gets cut, that person's soul cannot enter Heaven. Yet Elspeth sold her to Mr Dalrymple, claiming that Wee Morag would have wanted her to have the means to survive. Perhaps she was right. Perhaps Wee Morag would have made that sacrifice. But then Elspeth decided to kill herself and use the money she got for Wee Morag's body for her own funeral.

But does it make Elspeth wicked? Certainly not. She's simply torn by grief. I seriously doubt she's been planning to commit suicide when she was taking Wee Morag to Mr Dalrymple. She might have genuinely tried to carry on but the reality of what happened caught up to her. Mr Dalrymple's cruel words certainly didn't help her cope with a personal tragedy. I even suspect one of the reasons she sold her friend was that she had no idea what else to do with a dead body.

Does this excuse her actions? Kind of, but not really.

Elspeth was a tragic character, not an innocent lamb with a heart of gold.

The point is - can any of us really judge her?

Which, coincidentally, is a question that the original Good Omens book toyed with quite a lot.

If you've reached this far, thank you for reading!

[yetanotherhiddlestoner]

(MDNI 18+, smut will be eventually happening in this story line but still please respect the MDNI)

(Plus size reader x Negan. In the world of the dead rising, you just happen to fall for the one fucked up person who has no interest in you. And I am aware the timeline doesn't add up but for the story I had to make the timeline longer than a couple months.)

*Trigger Warning - There will be a few hurtful words. Negan is going to be an asshole for the first part of this so if you want the fluff and smut just skip past this chapter. Fatphobia. Eating Disorders. Fat shaming.*

CHAPTER ONE - I FELL HARD, YOU'LL FALL HARDER.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You remember the day that you were found and bought to the Sanctuary by Negan himself. You had been abandoned by your own people and left to die in the woods, Negan and his crew were on their way back home when he spotted you sitting at the base of the tree.

"Well Shit looky here" he said, and you looked up at him as he flung the bat over his shoulder. "You lost little lamb?", you were too scared to reply so you just nodded. "You alone?" again you nodded. "Do you speak?". You took a deep breathe and shallowed the ball of fear that had made it way to your throat "Yes, ummm" you didn't know this man, but holy hell was he hot. "I'm Negan, you may have heard of me?" He questions again. "No sorry I haven't." You tell him truthfully. "Well fuck me girly you have no fucking idea who I am" He looks shock as he lowers himself to your level, your eyes lock on to his. "Where did you come from; I own all the survivors in this area?" "My group never settled down, we were constantly wandering in search of supplies and would bunk down wherever we felt safe." Negan nodded understanding now how she wouldn't have known him if they were always on the move. "So where is your group now?" "They left me here, so I don't know."

"Excuse my fucking language but they fucking left one of their own out in this shithole world, what are you gonna do be walker bait? you don't seem to have any weapons on you, you're as helpless as a baby." You shrug, "I really don't know what I am going to do." He gets up quickly, but not before grabbing your hand and making you stand up to. "You are going to come to the Sanctuary with me. It is safe there, plenty of supplies and you can work for you food and other things," "Ok" is all you said as you follow Negan back. The first night there they didn't have a spare room for you so Negan let you crash in his room while he went and have fun with his wives. You had wanted to object to staying in his room, no doubt you could bunk on the floor anywhere else but he insisted that you had a goodnight sleep and that was that. For the first time in years, you slept peacefully.

You had lived with Negan as your leader for a few months now. You were thankful for the first time in your life to be a fat person, it meant Negan didn't want you as his wife, you could fly under the radar when it came to that way of living. You had been told many times by the other women there how they all had been asked to be his, but they had decided not to, they were allowed to live and work here.

He had a type as you could tell by the wives that he paraded around the compound daily and the ones he checked out when new people were bought in. His type was the tall skinny type, the ones that would go out nightly and party, who now obeyed him and gave themselves over to him whenever he wanted.

Yes, he was nicer to you than he was to most, he spoke to you with a kind voice, but he never asked you to be his, he never asked you to go hunt the dead down or even fight the ones who threaten to take over. Whenever you had interactions, he would never yell, and would often be smiling at you, of you took it as he was being a friendly leader. He disliked it when his men would interrupt your conversations. You did see his dark side, you saw what he did to people, the punishments, the torture.

After a while you started developing feelings, you tried to deny them, try to tell yourself it was pointless but it never worked, the more he spoke and showed you affection the more harder you fell and it made your heart break every time he had his body wrapped with his wives, it hurt to hear him talk about how they pleased him, how hard he was for them almost every day.

That changes in a blink of an eye.

"Hey Y/N Negan wants you in his office now" Simon says, leading the way to him.

You panic, have you done something wrong, have you not been pulling your weight? Had you missed an order he had given you?

"Come in" Negan says as soon as Simon knocks. "Sit" He orders you and Simon leaves you two alone. The room ran cold suddenly, this was not the Negan you knew. "It has been bought towards me by some of my men that maybe you should have less portions than the others considering how fat you are" Negan smirks, a laugh in voice. The words cut you like a knife. You look away from the man in front of you. "It really wouldn't hurt to lose a few now, would it?"

All you can do is nod. "Answer me dammit" he screams his hands hitting the desk. "Yes Negan" you muster up in a quiet voice. "I agree"

"Well alrighty then you can go finish your job then." he says dismissing you. You walk quickly to the bathroom, rushing past people trying to hide the tears.

"You, ok?" A female's voice says from one of the stalls.

You know her, she is one of his wives. "Yeah, I'm fine"

She puffs on a cigarette, "Let me guess you're Y/N?"

"How....did you know that?" You ask wiping your face.

"He talks openly around us, without realizing we hear and remember all, and from the tears he said some hurtful things, right? He has been boasting that shit all week. I am so sorry he said those things."

You shake your head, afraid of saying anything in case she would report it back to Negan.

"It is the truth, I am fat, I could use less food. I am not going to deny it. Less portions for me means more for others."

You leave the bathroom, feeling more shit about yourself than before.

It took about 2 months of planning before you had snuck enough weapons and food to make your get away. Sherry had helped you plan and save up for you to escape when nightfall came, she wanted to give you a chance, something that she didn't have at this point in time.

"Promise me you will never come back here" She asked as she opened the gate for you quietly.

"I promise but you deserve this so much more than I do" You whisper back to her, tears forming in both.

"I know Y/N but if I can help you and the others than maybe one day, I can be free to" she says wiping your tears away.

"You shouldn't have fallen for such a cruel man; I hope you find your happiness out there one day." Sherry gently places her hand on you cheek and smiles then closes the gate, leaving you in the woods once again. You run to the car that she had bargained just for you about 15 minutes away.

Once you started driving away you fought back the urge to cry. You were alone again, traveling to God knows where.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

12 Months later ~ Alexandria.

You had been at Alexandria for about 6 months when those trucks came rolling into your home. You had heard the stories about what he had done with Ricks gang and Rick knew that you had been one of his people before you escaped, only he knew the truth, he kept your secrets.

He made sure that each time Negan came to collect you were out scavenging. He wanted to protect you from him, with fears that maybe he would force you to return or hold some grudge over you leaving.

But on this day Negan had decided to come two days early and you looked at Rick for answers, you couldn't run and there was no point hiding as they searched the houses. Today you would be out there, you had just hoped that he didn't recognize you.

"Go over to the garden. Keep yourself blended with them; keep you hat down. He shouldn't bother you." Rick says pushing you to go.

You run over and quickly make yourself look busy, you picked up the small rack and you grabbed a spare hat and put it on, hiding your face.

You heard the tires, the brakes of the trucks squeal and a very familiar voice.

"Well Ricky boy look at you, your so close to pissing yourself aren't you."

You couldn't hear his reply. His men started to grab the goods that you spent time getting for him, a couple of them walked past you are smiling and wolf whistling at you and the others. You could hear him and Rick walking to the pantry, Olivia greeted them.

Negan laughed when Olivia was explaining that they were running out of food and staving.

"You got a fat chick guarding the food, are you sure as hell she not sneaking it at midnight.?" Rick stayed silent and Olivia started crying, you couldn't bear it.

You storm over to Olivia and Negan and slap him hard across the face. You turn to hug Olivia tightly.

"Fuck me, who the fuck do you think you are?" He says rubbing his cheek. You look at Rick from under your hat, "I'm Sorry" you whisper to him as he stares in shock.

"I asked you a question, you are to fucking answer it" he says grabbing you from Olivia pushing you to the floor, aiming Lucille at your face.

The hat still hiding your face, "You come here and take our stuff, that we worked hard on, that I don't care about but to talk shit about someone's weight is the fucking worse thing. You have no right to judge us on appearance." You say getting up, ignoring the protests from your friends and the fact that Lucille was still aimed.

"You must have some lady balls to speak to me like that. Who are you?" He uses Lucille to push the hat off and stops smirking. For the first time in 12 months, he locks eyes with you. Negan cannot believe what he is seeing.

"Y/N." he whispers. He notices that you have changed so much, you look good, not that you didn't look good before he thinks to himself.

"Are we done here?" Rick asks, everyone not sure what is about to happen.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Leave us, I think I need a word with Y/N alone." Negan places Lucille on his shoulders and one by one they leave. The group questioning Rick about you.

"Have you been here the entire fucking time?" Negan was mad.

"What does it matter?" You respond, eyeing him off.

"You fucking left in the middle of the night. Why?" He growls.

"Not like you cared but so what. One less fat mouth to feed would be a good thing, right?" He can hear the venom in your voice.

Now Negan understands, "So that is why? You were hurt by what I said."

"I am not the only one who wanted to escape you that night." Negan raises and eyebrow., you ignore his question.

"Let me guess, Sherry helped you. I had a feeling when she acted all weird the next day, avoiding me and shit." Negan slams Lucille down onto a coffee table, smashing it.

You don't flinch, you just look at the table, all broken. Wondering if you could repair it.

"AFTER EVERYTHING I DID FOR YOU. " Negan screams. You just breathe deeply.

"I was always thankful for what you did for me, saving me, giving me a bed and a room and a job." you say ignoring the tantrum that he was having.

"THEN WHY LEAVE OVER A STUPID COMMENT?"

"WHY?" You scream back before taking a deep breath "I was already eating less portions, if you or your men even cared to have noticed I only went to 2 dinners a week, I skipped most breakfast and lunches. I was already feeling bad for being fat, the looks I got for having the EXACT amount of food then everyone else confirmed what everyone was thinking and then you go and listen to your men and ask me to cut down more without even consulting me."

You tell him the truth; you were starving yourself anyway.

"You acted like an asshole; you could have maybe noticed that I was trying to change but you didn't." You spit back at him.

"So, you come to ole Ricky boy here and he takes you under his wing?" Negan eyes blacken as his says Rick's name.

"They saved me from a horde, I was stupid enough to try something and got overrun and stuck for a couple days on the roof of a shop. Simple as that, Negan."

"YOU WOULDN'T HAVE GOT STUCK IF YOU HAD STAYED WITH ME" Negan shouts the anger is bad once again. "I never asked you to scavenge, I kept you inside for a reason. I didn't want you to get hurt. I was always nice to you; did you not notice that?"

"And that is why your men did what they did, you showed me kindness, you showed them weakness, so when they came to you, telling you lies, and shit and you felt scared and put on the Big Bad Wolf pants and did what you did." "I have nothing more to say to you Negan. So, get the shit Rick and the rest of us have collected for you and get out." You look at him straight in the eyes, he just stares at you sternly, pointing Lucille at you. "If you were anybody else, I would have killed you." With that he turns his heels and stomps out, you hear shouting and the sound of the trucks being loaded. Once the gate closes, you break down crying. You feel Rick hugging you as you cry.

The next time you run into Negan, he a prisoner in Alexandria.

[tranceinnumerabletabs]

When Johnny Comes Back pt10

Howdy! I wrote this one with a bit more..care into it...This one was....an interesting one...er...Well i hope the all are...well..you'll see.

You don't have to press on the link in there but...like....Well I thought it was clever. Also the law thing was mainly a pun lol. Idk what length y'all want these. Anyway, thank you all SO much for the likes, reblogs and comments! I truly enjoy them!

tags: @supermegabitchboyexceptimagirl, and @beelzebee

part1, part2, part3, part4, part5, part6, part7,part8,part9

——

Your researching was amateur and honestly wrong. Which is a good thing. But you talked to god damn shadow and Sergeant Soap wasn’t gonna let that slide.

You both sit in silence as he intensely reads over everything you saw and how much trouble this could land you in.

You’re both coiled, him worried about you and angry at himself for ‘letting this happen’ even though it wasn’t his fault at all, and you nervous about his state and your safety. Johnny is usually so carefree and collected, so much to the point where you blew up on his face about it, but now it’s like you’re sitting next to an FBI agent checking to see if you sold the Queen of England to Russia. Is this was he was like all the time out there? He reads over everything you’ve seen, the accurate and inaccurate. He wasn’t happy about you knowing this. Some of the claims were wrong and made him look worse, but he can’t tell you the whole truth, it’s classified.

The guy claims to be an ex shadow and in need of quick cash. He claims to be disillusioned after the boss died. ‘Bloody shadows never do anythin for cheap. Could be a set up’ he thinks. According to his claims, since the death of his ‘boss’ he and many other shadows became splintered. The ‘boss’ must be Shepard. Well, strike the Shepard and the sheep will scatter. And sheep they are. He says that he’s off the grid now and can sell info to get by.

Tch, never trust a word from them. He could be fishing for insider information or connections.

Reading the messages he realized something:

There are encoded messages in here. You just didn’t...couldn’t notice them.

if you’re serious about this click this link. It’s Shadow:

UhpwoefWrlqaCploszYlnhfwdZhhdwjk

You then type:

the link didn’t work?

It’s code.

Another bit:

if I’m going to put myself in danger to tell you anything, only fair you’re in it too. Read these files. Law42

ATTACHMENT SENT

You clicked on it but it wasn’t functioning. You didn’t find any sort of info. The page first crashed and when you got it to work it was blank.

There’s nothing there ;-; All I’m asking for is the health status of all the SAS soldiers.

It wasn’t a useless link, you’re supposed to do some tinkering with code to unlock it.

Thank god you didn’t catch those. it seems like he caught the hint that you’re just an incident civilian and quickly found an excuse to leave the chat room after selling some files.

“Bollocks” he grunts

You tilt your head and look at him

“Ye been scammed. This ain’t true, this is useless intel, and these documents don’t say anythin’ valuable, and these are just low stakes intel, but these? These could be dangerous.” He explains curtly, he’ll have to report this to Price and Laswell.

“Only reason he talked to ye was that he thought ye were fishing for insider intel or had connections tae me he could exploit. If they knew yer digging’ too close…” he trails off as he scrolls to another part of the chat

“This is code. Do ye know what it says?”

“No”

“Good. Wouldn’t want ye tae be monitored”

“Monitored?”

“Aye. If the government found out yer looking at things like this they keep an aye on ye. You’ll know if all o’ the sudden, yer internet slows, emails bounce back, if ye really messed up ye might get watched.”

.

.

.

oh

oh no

that explains a lot

He sees your widening eyes

“What? What is it?”

“…..”

“Lass?”

“I…..I think….I’m being monitored”

Soap’s eyes widen

“What?”

“I…..I…..” you don’t know how to break this to him. He grips your shoulders “Tell me.”

“Well…..lately….my emails have been bouncing back…..and the internet is slower….”

“Anyone been following ye?”

You’re hesitant to respond. He grips your shoulders suddenly “Speak.” He orders and you jump to answer (you found that unexpected of you)

“T-there were these two men who seemed to follow me everywhere….some tried to talk to me….b-but I’m pretty sure they’re just….creepy men..” you say, unsure all of the sudden

“Did they try tae talk to you?”

“One of them did…Andrew I think his name was.”

“What did he ask you”

“He just….asked if I had anyone at home? I told him I had a boyfriend so he’d leave me alone. He gave me the creeps. Could be nothing though..”

his eyes squint “that all?”

“Uh…he started asking about my ‘boyfriend’ and then left me alone”

“What did he ask?”

“Um…” you think back, it was a while ago. “It’s…um…i remember thinking he was a creep who wouldn't catch a hint"

“Tell me what he said.”

“H…he…asked about my ‘boyfriend’s’ job is. I told him it’s none of his business but he kept pushing, asking about the salary and whether or not I’m proud of it. It was so unsettling and creepy. I told him that I didn’t want anything but he wouldn’t take a no. I then told him that my boyfriend is a…dangerous solider and doesn’t like anyone dangerous close to me and that we wouldn’t want an outsider. He finally left me alone but I got my friend to walk me home.”

He looks disappointed and distraught “oh no…lass….they were asking about me…what did you tell him? How much does he know?”

“Nothin! I just told him that..you’d….be dangerous if he kept bothering me.”

He groans and rubs his face “that was government agents Bonny. He was asking about what you knew... ye really jus' told 'em I'd turn on my job…..”

“Oh….” That explains a lot “b-but w-what about the stalker?”

“Sometimes they may come for a ‘courtesy visit’ and tell ye tae piss off. It’s better tae jus…go along. If ye got nothin tae hide ye’ve got nothin tae fear. what did ye do?”

“I avoided him”

“How?”

“Ran off..I drank a bunch so I don’t remember everything..but I remember waking up in a hotel room alone….”

“Bloody Christ….” He groans and lays back on the chair

“What?” You say, hating this situation

“Ye made it worse….did he try to come again?”

“Once…he tried knocking at my door..I didn’t answer…..and I think I may have saw him outside my work? maybe that time was just paranoia....I started changing my routes too.….”

“Did ye tell anyone?”

“Yeah. I told my friends and I told the police…they didn’t do anything though..” He sighs, his hand falling from his face “of course they didn’t do anythin’.”

You look a little confused “why?”

“Fer the same reason ye don’t see Miley Cyrus and Hannah Montana in the same room at the same time” he deadpans

“Oh….right….”

A very uncomfortable silence befalls both of you. Silence wasn’t usually uncomfortable with Johnny, but it seems that there’s a first time for everything for both you and Soap. He sighs and straightens up. “I should decode and send these tae Price and Laswell, just in case. They’ll Ken what tae do” he takes pictures of the messages and sends it to however those people are as you’re just watching him.

He then starts to fiddle with the documents, mumbling to himself like “law 42? The fook does that mean?” And “it’s shadow? Could be the Vigenère word.” He pulls out his phone and types what written on screen.

His eyes shoot open “shit”

part11

[booksndpoetry]

Nerdy is the New Sexy

A Han Jisung Fanfic

m.list

A/N: If anyone gets the title reference, know that I love you.

WC: 1.08k words

Genre: Fluff

Characters: University Student Han Jisung X Gn reader

Triggers/Warnings: Idiots in love, mutual, oblivious pining (I don't like this but here we are)

“Your/Name. Go to sleep.” Jisung says from his room, rubbing his eyes.

You startle at the sudden noise, only to realize it's your roommate, staying up because of the harsh light coming from your room.

“Sorry,” you say, “I’ll just be up for a few more minutes.” “What’s so important you’re staying up for it?”

He comes into your room to peer into your laptop screen. Your breathing quickens at the proximity. He squints for a moment and then he looks at you dead in the eyes.

“Why the hell are you researching Popular dishes of the Medieval Period?” “You never know. I might need it” you weakly defend, though you were just insatiably curious. “God, you’re such a nerd.” He says fondly.

You almost forget how to breathe. Both, from the words coming and the person speaking them. 

“I’m not a nerd,” you reply, your tone soft, but firm.

“I’m not a nerd because nerds genuinely spend their time learning new things, things that make them appreciate the world more. Something that justifies as well as glorifies their existence on this planet. It's like giving back because you have a chance to live a life. I'm not a nerd because I sometimes procrastinate and end up hurriedly finishing the essay in two hours instead of the four I'd originally kept apart for it.” You ramble in one breath. 

Han watches you, soft eyes taking in your every breath and relishing in the words you speak. He didn’t know it was possible to love someone so much, without even touching them. For him, you were the human embodiment of love and he didn’t like it when you discredited yourself, even for the smallest of things.

“But you write as good of an essay you do in two as well as you do one in four.” He says firmly. 

“That’s true,” you muse, “Work expands to fill the Time allocated to it, I guess.” He gives you a self-satisfied look that says ‘See? I told you so.’ 

“You’re a nerd,” he says in finality. ”Don't even start about how you're not qualified to be one. You're the biggest nerd I know. You're a writer, you make everything sound enjoyable, you're kind, and you have such thoughts about nerds. You're the epitome of a nerd if I ever saw one. So don't worry your little head and come back to sleep. I don't want to drag you to class tomorrow and hear your whining.” He ends his speech with a tired expression as if recounting all the times he dragged your whiny self to classes held at ungodly hours of the morning.

Your heart lurched and backflipped in your chest. God, this was embarrassing, even if you were the only one who witnessed your lovesickness.

He was basically confessing to you, in terms of, hot romance novel terms. But he wasn't the male lead of a romcom and you weren't the protagonist. He was your roommate and you were his friend he was forced to get acquainted with because of your living situation, nothing more.

You don’t want to have fantasies that will end up being just that, fantasies.

So you don’t think about how nice his smile is, or how his arms have been bulging out from his sleeveless shirts recently and how utterly easy it is to love him.

You decide you'll just keep this safely tucked into your mind, where nothing can reach it. You vow to yourself you'll keep it safe for when you second guess whether you really want to keep loving him, when you second guess if you need to keep writing, or when you feel like giving up on yourself. You're nothing if not a writer of your words.

‘What a lame excuse of a pun.’ You tell yourself. But then with the look he's giving you, you realise you haven't given him a response to his words, yet. And you sheepishly smile as he shakes his head, knowing you got caught up in your head again.

“Thank you,” you tell him. You want to tell him of your gratitude in great detail, in a much more deserving way, but words have deserted your mind now and these will have to do.

He smiles, “You act like it isn't true. It is. Now hurry up and get to bed.” He pats your bed and falls into the mass of pillows you’ve kept there. You giggle at his action. That was another thing. You were always smiling around him. He made it so easy. 

"Talk dirty to me, why don't you?" you say, playfully wiggling your eyebrows and he throws a chocolate wrapper around you. You frown at that.

“That was my bookmark, you dweeb.”

“So?” he questions as though it means nothing.

“Find another one” he says nonchalantly and you want to throw a brick at his stupidly beautiful face.

“I can’t. Ugh. What do you know about the struggles of a bookworm?”

He rolls his eyes at your theatrics. Even as he makes a note to carry some chocolates for you tomorrow, so you can have enough bookmarks.

“I’ll get you your favourite drink if you come to bed right now,” he says, attentive eyes waiting for your reaction.

For one moment, when he says that, you pretend he's your boyfriend who’s really in love with you. You know you shouldn’t do it but all the fics on your phone say otherwise. So, you pretend he's beckoning you to come sleep next to him, waiting to pull your face under his chin and rest his head on yours. It feels heavenly, the feeling. You wouldn't ever refuse to go to bed if it were real. So you don't refuse now. You turn off your computer and your desk lamp, take off your glasses and dive headfirst into your bed, and it’s his turn to giggle at your antics. You won’t refuse him anything even if he’s not yours. The power he had over you, you didn’t ever want him to know. 

He tucks you in like a baby, and whispers “Sleep well, you nerd”, and then he’s off to his own room. You merely smile and snuggle in, and you’re out like a light moments after.

Only when the door is firmly shut, does he kick his feet in the air, having a full-on meltdown after being so near to you. Was this his punishment for writing songs with unrequited love? He groaned. It was so unfair. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

© booksndpoetry 2024. All rights reserved. Please do not plagiarise, translate, repost or steal my works in any way. All idols used in this piece are just inspiration for characters. They do not reflect the real people in any way.

[finniestoncrane]

Hi.

Can I request a fluff short fic with a female! Reader and Mr. Freeze (any version) where the reader is super clumsy and accidentally breaks something important of his. She gets kind of scared that he's going to kill her for it, but instead he tells her to be more careful and that it is no big deal she broke the object.

If you can't, that's ok. You're writing is great.

Thanks.

~Sabrina

Gotham!Freeze x Fem!Reader, word count: 500 one nervous little lab assistant coming up!! honestly that would be me. freeze is terrifying, he's a properly scary villain in any iteration and i also love him he's so soft ;-;💙 request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi • masterlist minors DNI!! 🔞 cw: lil bit of blood

It was an unspoken rule that you should be quiet in the lab. A rule you had imposed on yourself, although you suspected that Victor preferred to work in silence. You never wanted to interrupt him, never wanted to steal focus from his work. It was already a stressful job, topped off by your constant worrying about how Victor felt about you as an employee. Were you a hindrance more than an attribute? Would you live up to his expectations? On top of all the other things you had to be aware of while working in the lab, you were giving yourself so much more to stress over.

But it was impossible not to, especially where Victor was concerned. You were somewhat aware of his past, vaguely familiar with what had happened to his wife, what he'd done to necessitate hiding away. He had lost so much, and he was willing to give up so much more. How much would it take for him to flip and decide that you were collateral damage? That he could kill you and be rid of you at a moment's notice?

So deep in thought were you that you stumbled over some loose cables on the floor, dropping the four beakers you had taken to the sink to clean. As they fell, the world fell into slow motion, only brought back to speed as the sound of them shattering on the ground ran in your ears.

You were motionless. Standing there amongst the glass in terror, watching as Victor turned from his work to see where the noise had come from. As he took long strides towards you, you could feel your breath, shallow, almost completely stopping.

"You're trembling."

Looking at him, you waited for more, unable to speak.

"You're always so quiet. Do loud noises scare you?"

"N-no..."

"Well, what are you afraid of then?"

Unsure of what was the best move in this particular, unimaginable situation, you decided to answer truthfully.

"You do... I'm sorry."

With a sigh, Victor crouched and began picking up the shards of glass at your feet.

"Don't apologise. I think maybe I could stand to be a little less... cold, if you'll excuse the pun."

His fingers carefully selected the larger shards, moving them to the bin under the desk beside you both, clearing the floor for you to be able to move away from the rest of the remaining danger. One particular piece caught the light as he lifted it, and he looked to your eyes, catching your gaze.

"The shards are beautiful..."

He turned it in his hand and you noticed the droplets of blood on his fingertips.

"... but they're sharp. Dangerous. It's important to remember that they are both. Two sides. Sharp, but delicate. Like me."

The smile he offered you was sincere, filled with genuine emotion, enough to settle your chest, your breathing returning to normal as your panic subsided a little. But your heart was still beating. Not with fear now, but with a little twinkle of excitement as he looked away from you, still smiling, cheeks ever so slightly red under his pallid hue.

[ilminnestrone]

Angeal has really nice hands; good for gardening, taking photos, hugging his friends, among others 🥰

Angeal is very good with his hands. He can salvage plants from the most desperate of conditions and propagate enough cuttings to turn an apartment into a jungle. Every Saturday night he kneads bread to be baked on Sunday morning, and Sephiroth may or may not stop by just to see him covered in flour as those fingers deftly work the dough. And he can fix almost anything ("If it ain't broke, it can be saved" a legacy from the days when money was scarce). "Geal dear, the sink is still leaking… Tongue and groove pliers? Darling, the only tongue and groove I know is… yeah, 18:00 is fine for me, thanks", and it's clearly just an excuse for Genesis to see him in a tank top, sweating on his bathroom floor.

His work-worn hands were in danger of becoming rough and hard, but once again Genesis found the perfect way to guilt him into using the fancy cream he gifts him every Christmas: "I opened it before I came here. It has a 6-month PAO. Sorry.”

Obviously his massages are something so brain-rewiring that he had a pupil or two fake an injury just to get one. But not all of his massages are suitable for his students.

When his hands, already oiled up to glide perfectly over the tired muscles, finally descend on his host's tense thighs, it is no longer an intense pressing of the thumbs or a deep squeezing of the palms, but a slow, lingering brushing of the fingertips sinking in between them, pampering the tender skin of their inner thigh.

“Is this okay?” Little more than a rhetorical question, given the way his darling's legs open as he passes by.

When a single finger teases her entrance with a touch so light it causes a groan of frustration, his tone becomes playful, almost mocking: “Sssh. No need to be pushy…” and his finger slides in in a slow motion, nipping any possible reply in the bud.

He would take his time to find the right angle, the best way to curl his finger to reach that delicious spot that would make them purr and frown, only to pull his finger out and taste them on it with a satisfied hum: "The sweetest nectar comes from this pretty flower: I would like to keep it in my garden..."

A sudden whimper: two fingers. They barely register his next encouragement: "You can take it, can't you?" Not only can they, but they would start to roll their hips, the friction suddenly not enough, the pace too slow, the heat too intense... "Tsk tsk..." a strong, big hand holds them easily in place, but the tone is still warm and calm, a gentle whisper in their ear, "you'll take what I give you".

And what he gives them is a third finger, pressing deep into them, the heel of his hand barely grazing the spot where they need him the most. Was that his name? A plea? Or just a wordless moan? He couldn't quite tell over the wet sound of their welcoming body.

"Come again, love?" he chuckles "Oh, sorry, pun intended... let me just..."

Finally - finally! - his free hand reaches its final destination: it wouldn't be necessary, but they're so impatient, and those whines sound as desperate as a hungry puppy... To Angeal's sweet friend, completely encircled by those muscular, tanned arms, with three fingers pushing relentlessly inside them and his mouth nipping at their sensitive neck, all it takes to push them over the edge is a couple of strokes: when they start to shake and gasp, letting their head bob back on his shoulder, his low voice guides them into their pleasure, reassuring and praising once again. "Isn't it nice to just let go, dove? Feels good, doesn't it?" And then, mere seconds later, "Another one?"

[howlingday]

Time Travel AU with Winter? She also got the maiden powers so things are bound to get wild, no?

Winter: I have returned.

Ironwood: Winter?! What is the meaning of-?!

Winter: (Raises hand) Silence, fascist!

Ironwood: (Frozen in block of ice)

Winter: Now, where is the punch bowl? I require refreshments of the fruitest of beverages.

Neptune: Uh, over there, Miss.

Winter: ...Thank you. You shall live one day more.

Winter: Everyone else, you are on thin ice.

Yang: I thought I was the one who made puns?

Blake: Other people can, too. In fact, other people should.

Yang: So harsh. You probably need a cat-nap, don't you?

Nora: What's she talking about?

Blake: Yeah, Yang, what ARE you talking about?

Yang: Ah, crap... Well, uh...

Winter: Your friend is a Faunus.

Nora: Really?

Blake: What the hell?!

Winter: Now, if you wish to keep your little secret, you will kiss for me.

Yang: Well, if you say so~.

Blake: Ugh...

Winter: Not you two. You two!

Nora: Huh?!

Blake: What?!

Winter: Yes, you two! Make out with each other, for my amusement~.

Blake: I-I'm not going to-

Winter: Do it, or the bunny dies!

Velvet: Where did you come from?! Blake, help!

Blake: I-

Nora: Uh, just think of something pleasant!

Blake: What? Nora, I don't- MMH!

Winter: Yes... Just like that~.

Velvet: (Drops) Oh, thank god...

Jaune: Velvet! Are you okay?

Velvet: I'm fine. I-

Winter: You, in the dress! Come here!

Jaune: Me? No! You hurt my friend!

Winter: So brave, and so noble, yet so graceful and beautiful. Yes, you are perfect.

Jaune: Perfect? Perfect for what?

Winter: To be my bride, of course!

Jaune: Be your what?!

Winter: Yes, it will be a beautiful Atlesian wedding, set in the dead center of billowing snow and chilling wind.

Pyrrha: Jaune, is everything okay?

Jaune: You're crazy! I'm not marrying you!

Winter: Oh, and on what grounds do you- Hohoho... Of course, how foolish of me to make a wife of a husband.

Jaune: Huh? Uh, yeah, I guess.

Winter: Then we shall exchange words no longer. You there, Nikos!

Pyrrha: Eh?!

Winter: I wish to ally myself with you so that we may share the same lover.

Pyrrha: I don't- What?

Winter: If you agree, then I shall allow you to continue your affections with your husband, and I shall only bear mine when you have completed yours.

Pyrrha: What do you mean?

Winter: Share Jaune Arc with me, and I shall simply warm your shared bed whilst you are away.

Jaune: You're insane! There's no way Pyrrha would agree to-

Pyrrha: DEAL!

Jaune: PYRRHA?!

Winter: Excellent! Our triad of lovers shall be established in the coming post-autumnal season.

Jaune: I- what?!

Pyrrha: She means winter.

Jaune: What?

Winter: Me. I am Winter. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must speak with the music man. (Turns) YOU THERE, DISC JOCKEY!

[oraclekleo]

Hi Kleo!

Hope I can still make it to your ask game!

My MBTI is still currently INTP and my big 3 is all fire except for Aries~

So I wanted to do an exchange because I miss you so much!

I know your game said one card pull but even my cards missed you so much, they had me pull three. They're in their "All for one, one for all" era with the 3 of Wands, Tower and Chariot when I asked what sexual fantasy should you try to make come true.

You know I love you right?

You also agree that tarot readers are just channelers/messengers, right? So don't shoot me, okay??

Because the first word that came to mind was 3 some.

Like, reverse harem, "why choose when a woman's body has more than one h°le" kind of unhinged sexual fantasy.

It's like there's this flustering suggestion to try to experiment as a means of sexual liberation and expression. Like, it could be that things have been too vanila for you lately or you might be suggested to learn to just surrender and just "receive".

Gurllllllllll this is why I don't actively do NSFW readings, this is so unhinged for my sanity to comprehend!?!

*knocked out from the first card's unhinged message*

(after a few minutes of drinking half a tumbler of the iced water)

*clears throat and slaps my chubbi chiiiks silly to concentrate*

Kleo, I'll do my best to continue, because I miss you! I have to persevere!!!!

Okay, next card is the Tower card which suggests you should try corruption kink, with a mix of intense fucking to the point of mind break.

Basically, it has to be so intense, rough and life changing where your partner has to make sure you'll end up being this drooling tired mess, excuse the graphic description but..., it has to be so good that you got dickmatized.

You know the type where you'll be like, "One kid won't be so bad". Tbh, it's the type that reminds me of those smut books... I heard Haunting Adeline, rougher than 365 days. Last thing I heard was, you'll need to put "Smut authors to shame".

I'm seeing this, but with more than one partner. Tbh, I heard 3. But you're the only girl.

Lemme just...

(okay I'm back for who knows how long just to calm down)

So finally, the last card is the Chariot, I heard raw and, unplanned, public, impulsive, but not a quickie though.

I also saw outside and water... Like, a pool, lake, river, beach, just literally go for it. Gurllllllllll I can't with your reading!! This shit is insane!! Like, when your NSFW question literally went full blown NOT SAFE?! Sweetheart, this is literally insane but good luck!

The last message from my cards was,

"If anyone can do this,

it's obviously Kleo."

Let me know how this resonates with you okay??

Oh girl! This is gonna be long, soooo looooong (pun intended 🍆).

First of all, I want to apologize to my followers who actually read the reading done for me. Sneak peak into my brain isn't pretty. 🤣

Now! Darling! You... NAILED IT! 😂 I swear, nobody ever DARED to give me such a reading even when I truly craved it. I swear you were born for NSFW readings even if you clearly broke down several times during this one. You certainly have courage to practice with me 😘

Before I forget it... The GIFs! I can't... The one with chaining up... I'm dead 🤣 And my Sir Hiddleston! 🥰

Okay! Let me give a proper feedback!

I love you, too. I hope you know it but I'm saying it because everyone should know.

The idea of a harem? Absolutely spot on. I have my mental harem in my mind with all the hotties I ever had a crush on but obviously, the real version is very tempting. 😏

"why choose when a woman's body has more than one h°le" "experiment as a means of sexual liberation and expression" "try corruption kink, with a mix of intense fucking to the point of mind break" "dickmatized" "put smut authors to shame" "raw and, unplanned, public, impulsive"

I just feel so exposed! 🤣 I mean, everybody here knows that irl I don't even touch people because I don't like it but I will admit that my brain is a dark territory. 🤣 And yes, these beasts and monsters live there and I'm so sorry you had to meet them during this reading.

I mean, not that much sorry because I absolutely loved your reading. You should start practicing the NSFW readings because... lady! You have talent. You see the images, you feel, you witness it all. That's a great gift... unless you die of blushing and laughing 🤣

Although... Maybe practice with someone less unhinged than me next time. I don't know how you digged into the depths of my brain which are usually hidden even from other readers but you clearly found some shortcut. 😛

Okay! Time to do your reading and I already feel like I just can't match you here but I will try. 😈

Hello!

Thank you so much for participating in this tiny game!

Let's see!

Question: What hidden sexual fantasy you should make come true?

Deck: The Slavic Legends Tarot - illustrated by Magdalena Kaczan

Card: 8 of Wands

Oh! Who's here for some quickie! No, actually this card reminds me more of wild and raw passion. You desire to feel the unconditional and unfiltred desire, the lust that consumes you in one mighty fiery blow. You desire to be swept off your feet and tossed into the swirling tornado of sexual experience (and into bed). You want your blood to boil, your skin glistening with sweat, your heart skipping beats, your eyes rolling back, your mouth gaping and your muscles spasm in extasy. It's not a quickie but it feels like as if you ran a record sprint, leaving you gasping for air and unable to walk. And while it's not typically a part of the 8 of Wands but I see that this experience you crave leaves you happy and smiling blissfully.

Let's close it here.

Once again, thank you so much for your reading, I can truly understand how exhausting it must have been. 💖💗

[cowgurrrl]

since OFTM asks are being answered atm, I thought I'd come through with a few questions of my own about this WONDERFUL and LOVELY series because it's that good!

1. ik we're wayyyyyy past it but do rockstar!joel and actress!reader do anything for Valentine's day? have they done things early on the relationship, do they still celebrate now or maybe it's something simple like posting cute photos of each other on their stories??

2. okay this one is a fun one and I know there was an ask about how reader would potentially be a presenter at an award show BUT would she ever host at some point? if so, i definitely think she'd pull it off + she'd probably do some cute promos as well, maybe even do an announcement promo with joel in some way! i think it'd be fun for her if she did + joel and the kids would LOVE it.

3. as reader ever got to work with big name actors/actresses before or does she prefer more indie like things and working with more unknown actors and actresses?

4. idk if it was mentioned at some point but was reader ever pregnant during a project/role she was doing? how was her experience and what was it like? i def think there'd be times when joel visited the set and she was all smiles because "daddy's here! visiting us" haha, it'd be precious!

5. this one is ABSOLUTELY silly but i notice how some celebrities will be at big events or something such as a tennis game or whatever and some of the reactions are SUCH a mood so i feel like if joel and reader attended some type of event like that, their reactions would be so silly and REAL.

last one finally lmaooo, im sorry i just love these two lots but speaking of special events, i think of how sweet and nice it is to imagine joel just watching from a distance as reader is out doing her thing at a premiere or something like the met gala where she looks GORGEOUS and Joel's thinking "wow, there she is! that's my amazing beautiful wife" 🥹🥹🥹 because he's such a supporter of her HELLO and he's just an awe but also, imagine how reader feels whenever she sees joel on stage knowing that a song is being dedicated to her or just watching her husband from a distance knowing that's the person she's married and fell for.

ANYWAYS! this is so long, again so sorry 😭 but I'm curious to know your answers when you get a chance 👀💜💜💜💜

DONT BE SORRY THIS IS WHAT I LIVE FOR OKAY

I think at the beginning of their relationship, they definitely go all out for Valentine's Day. Nice hotels, dinners, heartfelt (and expensive) presents, the whole nine yards. I think when Sam and the girls are little, it gets harder to do stuff for Valentine's Day especially when you're bouncing between work, school, and helping your children make "Valentimes" for their classmates. Things calm down just a little and you two will settle for a nice, homemade dinner in your messy kitchen after the kids have gone to bed. Joel will send flowers to you at work and you'll humor him with a silly, giggly strip tease even though you're wearing sweatpants and a shirt with marker stains on it. It's pure, domestic bliss. Once the kids are older and they've been married for a long time, I think they would alternate between elaborate plans and low-key ones. After all, they definitely don't need an excuse to be grossly in love with each other.

I could totally see her hosting an award show! She'd be so busy but having so much fun and she'd recruit all her famous contacts to help her with promotion and what not. On the night of, if Joel's not there, he totally sets up a watch party at home with all of the Miller kids, spouses, and grandkids and cheers you on the whole time. If he is there, the kids are probably there too and help you backstage with awards, setting up different presenters, and keeping you calm. You'd all get dressed up and take nice pictures as a family. I see it being hectic but so rewarding (no pun intended)

I think it's a good mix of both! I have it in my personal canon that she does go on to do some Marvel, Greta Gerwig, Bridgerton type projects that have so much hype (and a huge budget) surrounding them but I also see her taking on some smaller roles from smaller production companies as long as the story is good. In my head, Red Dirt Girl (the movie talked about through much of the main storyline) is a smaller production and smaller actors but they all end up taking OFF after that.

I WAS LITERALLY THINKING ABOUT THIS TODAY GET OUT OF MY HEAD okay so I think with Sam, she is definitely pregnant in the middle of filming something but doesn't realize until she passes out at work or something and she gets taken to the hospital where they find out she's pregnant. They weren't trying but they weren't being careful so it's a little bit of a shock but they adjusted. For the first time in her career, she'd let them hire a stunt double for her and would take it easier than she had in the past. They'd definitely have to change some wardrobe and people would treat her like she's made of glass but it's all manageable. Joel would be the biggest change of pace. He'd been on set before but after they find out they're pregnant, HES THERE EVERYDAY. I think they'd fight about it a little bit just because she feels a little smothered and Joel agrees to back off a little. As she progresses, I think she'd be more okay with him visiting and would poke at her belly and be like, "your dad's here." With the twins, they find out relatively early on because her symptoms are so bad it's literally unavoidable and they try to keep it a secret for as long as possible BUT when she goes back to reshoot a scene where she has to be smoking a cigarette or something, she's like, "..... no." and they're like "we need this for continuity," and she's like "I'm pregnant. With twins." BECAUSE WHAT ELSE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO SAY. I think she would've worked for longer when she was pregnant with Sam than when she was pregnant with the girls just because of the risks and Miller children are not known for being easy so I definitely think she'd have a harder time with the girls than she did with Sam but everything ends up okay!

It's canon to me that the Millers are a BASEBALL FAMILY it was actually one of the first things I wrote for the One for the Money universe! Joel is partial to the Astros (boo) while she's definitely more of a Cubs/Yankees fan because she lived in New York and did a lot of filming in the Chicago/Midwest area for a time. I think they would be able to compromise and cheer for the Dodgers together but when it comes to their personal teams, they don't play around. Sam also goes on to play baseball professionally so I see them going to baseball games together as a big, happy family. Being an actress, she DEFINITELY wouldn't be able to keep her emotions a secret and would regularly be caught yelling, cheering, and dancing along to whatever song is playing through the stadium. God Bless anyone in the nearest vicinity when the Astros and the Yankee's play each other in the World Series.

I 100% think Joel has these moments all the time at events. I see her off doing her own thing like interviews or individual photos and he's just staring at her like "that's really my wife." He's known to get teary or really affectionate on red carpets, giving photographers everything and more. She tends to do the same thing, especially if he's getting recognized for something, and will get choked up during interviews about him. They're just so in love and proud of each other they make me SICK

Thank you for all your fun questions about my little oftm family! I hadn't thought about some of these before and it was really fun to think about them so thank you!!!

[tsuki-sennin]

Okaeri, Sabi-senpai :)

Anyhoo, WOOOOOOOOOO SUPER GOTCHARD

BRO THIS IS SO LIT OH MY GOD

THAT'S WHY HE'S THE GOOOOAT

-Hello, Goat-aro.

-...Oh, that's actually a good pun. I'm gonna hold that in my back pocket.

-Dinosaur~!

-HE'S EATING PEOPLE

-Oh shit, crimbus

-Hoppa pa~! Hoppa pa~!

-Christmas Gotcha!

-Oh fuck, Kudoh

-Oh don't worry Rinne. If you lived in America, you'd see them come up on November 1st.

-Ahhhhh, planning ahead.

-Well, you don't know! Lotsa people love a good peking duck Christmas.

-Renge-oneesan...

-Wanna come eat dinner? :3

-Ohhhhh, I see...

-Day off time~!

-Free the Hopper

-To the lake with us.

-Oh, hey man.

-"The fuck...?"

-Oh god, dinosaurs, it's the revenge of Revice.

-"That kid's really messing you up, huh Rinne-san?"

-Rinne... :(

-Ohhhhh, Hotaro... :(

-You poor kids.

-They're gonna have to deal with X-Rex later too :(

-Oh, now

-Level 10~!

-"Ohhhhh coool! Dinosaurs~! I wanna hug him~!"

-"You'll be hugging his colon in five minutes if you're not careful."

-"Civilization~!"

-Hi Spanner.

-I see the Alchemist Guild is still acting hella sus.

-Sawa

-Oh, you're

-Definitely unrelated, don't mind me little lady.

-I really like your outfit, it's super cute and comfy looking.

-Are we getting rival magazines?

-Cryptozoology~!

-Unfortunately a field littered with pseudoscience and sensationalist television, but definitely no less legitimate a science in the Kamen Rider verse than alchemy.

-Oh hi, Spanner.

-"Come fight me, you vermin."

-"Gladl- wh- hey!"

-"I called dibs~! Remember~?"

-Oh hell yeah, Lachesis Rider.

-I see Dread's power doesn't affect them negatively at all. As expected.

-"Oh no you don't, Kurogane Spanner~!"

-GIRL???????

-...oh man, now I'm completely enamored.

-God, Valvarad's just getting Worfed left and right. ...it's like the second coming of G3.

-...Hikawa, I'm so sorry.

-Oh my god, she blows a kiss.

-"You can keep your shitty wrench sword, we want Kamen Rider's belt."

-The internet is dominated with talks about the Kamen Rider~!

-OH MY GOD, HE ATE HIM

-Cut! Drag! Paste!

-That's our Kamen Rider for you.

-Oh..... a photograph...

-We're Bowser's Inside Story now.

-Literal Vore.

-Ohhh....

-Pops....

-A beautiful dream...

-Okay, while Chemies numbered 1-9 can be forcibly merged by human malice, Level 10 Chemies instead have the capacity to choose what they seek out.

-I wonder if that's how X-Wizard drives the plot in the movie?

-Ohhhh... Sawa-chan...

-Y-you don't know that! He could've gotten eaten by X-Rex and dropped it!

-"What the hell man, no! I'm not gonna lie about my beloved dinosaurs!"

-He was so desperate to keep it together...

-Ohhhhhhh, nooooo, Manabe-san... :(

-Noooooooo :((((

-Give the man hope :)

-"Kudoh Rinne. I'm gonna smash your bug boyfriend into paste."

-X-Rex wants to know....

-"Come eat me instead~!"

-Manabe-san's had quite a wild day. First he has a depression walk over his journalistic integrity, then he gets eaten by a dinosaur, then he's stuck wallowing over his poor daughter, and now this kid's inviting him to probe his mind.

-WHAAAAAAT????

-EXCUSE ME?????

-WHERE THAT HOPPER COME FROM????

-Gotcha get???

-UFO-X... we made a friend :)

-Croissant~!

-And now he's an alien.

-Zoop~!

-"Child murder~! My favorite hobby~!"

"Fucking finally. I've been waiting all goddamn month for this!"

-OHHHHHHHH FUUUUCK CLOTHO TIME

-...y'know, looking at Dread's design, it can be quite feminine.

-"This form's ours, you little shit. Of course we do it better."

-Hi X-Rex :)

-Gonna leave us off on a cliff hanger, eh?

-Ohhhhh, I don't mind! I got a lot of what I wanted from this run of episodes, so... I can only hope Clotho gets to cause all the carnage she wants even with Hotaro trouncing her.

-Oh shit, Rinne/Atropos duel, X-Wizard cameo, and form debut battle?

-Going a mile a minute next week!

-KAJIKI SERVES?????

-The legends are true...

-No wonder Kaguya made him his butler in the A.R. World.

[vinterhjerte]

on this day ten years ago, i made a tumblr blog.

i had been hyped for this new disney movie coming out. there was a character that, even before i saw the film, i felt a connection to. at the time, i was a seventeen-year-old doing her a levels, and it felt a little childish to be so attached to something before it had even come out, but i was in a dark place. waiting for this movie, waiting for this character, gave me something to look forward to.

frozen was due out in december in the uk, and despite not seeing the movie yet, i made a blog for elsa.

the rest, as they say, is history.

except it's not.

i want to talk more about the way just having this blog has changed my life. elsa was my first proper rp character. i had done a few bits of tumblr rp before, with some friends, but this was my first time striking out on my own. in the ten years since, my activity has ranged from violently active to no posts for months (whoops, this is me at the moment). but elsa is always there as a muse, as easy to slip on as a glove, if you'll excuse the pun. having her made me confident enough to make other blogs.

and i had the time of my life writing characters like edward, bucky, fantine, elphaba, kassandra, iduna. a few i tried but never kept up with. a few that are still going. but i would never have made them without elsa.

i have never archived and moved blogs. if you wanted to, you could read through my entire decade of writing her, just through this account. i'm pretty proud of that. is it all great? absolutely not, but i had fun. there's tumblr rp history in there, some nutty shit we used to do. it's funny to dip back into like. 2015 and see what we were up to. what were the trends. i learned so much about myself in these last ten years, and this blog has always been a solid place to lean on. thank you all for giving that to me, whether you're still around and reading this, or long gone.

and i would be remiss if i did not mention one standout from these last ten years. @applesforanna.

tala, you have been my friend for so, so long now. we may not write these two 'officially' together that much anymore, but our never ending conversations about them still bring me so much joy. we can dip in and out as our lives have changed, but i know i can always pick up where we left off. my elsa wouldn't be the same without your anna. i wouldn't be the same without you. we live so far across the world from each other, but i still consider you one of my best friends. thank you for being there all this time. here's to more exports from the angst factory.

[coldflasher]

you know i have to ask about coldwest for the ship thing

hmmm yeah, this one isn't for me really :/ not my cup of tea

jokes, can you imagine haha. i am the captain of coldwest. yo ho ho and a bottle of why-the-fuck-didn't-they-get-more-screentime

What made you ship it?

Honestly I had never even thought about shipping them until Redhead's fic "Needs Must, As the Devil Drives" got me super into Coldwestallen, and from there I spent a lot more time thinking about the Coldwest side of that dynamic and what a fun and complicated relationship that would be... then the rest, ngl, was largely built from my own headcanons and bits of dozens of fics that hopefully, one day, I will actually finish...

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

So many things!! I think the first thing that comes to mind is that I feel like Coldwest offers a great opportunity to put Iris out there in the field. The show kind of tends to keep Iris out of the action a lot. Like she is a hugely important member of the team, obviously, but she's generally sitting in S.T.A.R Labs running tech support, and aside from occasionally getting temporary speed powers or occasionally aiming a gun at a threat, she often takes a back seat to the action. Barry in particular has this tendency to want to get Iris as far away from a fight as possible, and while I get it, I love seeing Iris kick ass. We know she can shoot, throw a punch, whatever, but she rarely gets the opportunity to get out there as much, and whenever she does, it's panic button time and she gets whisked to safety. I feel like Len, with his tendency to get into trouble, his love of adrenaline and a fight, and the thrill he clearly gets while fighting, would love to have Iris on his side in that kind of situation, and he wouldn't hesitate to get her involved. He'd actually encourage it, if anything. Which also provides fun conflict with Joe, who would already be seething that this criminal is dating his daughter, but now he's encouraging her to put her life at risk and possibly commit crimes? Oh, the drama >:) I love writing Coldwest team-ups where Iris gets to use her skills as a reporter while Len uses his skills as a thief, and they kind of play off one another... with lots of back and forth arguing and snark, of course.

I also personally like that, in my view, Iris would have a better handle on Len than anyone else. Like he's more willing to let her boss him around than he would be with another partner. As mentioned, she doesn't take his shit, she's not as amused by him and she will tell him to cut the crap if he's being a dick. In contrast, though, I also feel like he'd be softer than her than he would with another partner. Sure, he'll pull her pigtails and make mean, sly comments, he wouldn't be Len if he didn't... but he also admires and respects her, he's a fan of her work, and I think that Iris is just such a kind and gentle person that I think being around her would soften him. He'd never admit it, but in my head, he's so gone for her, and while it might take a while for him to let his guard down, if you'll excuse the terrible ice pun, he'd melt for her. Like. That small smile he gives to show he's proud of his sister---that kind of moment, all this affection and pride that he keeps private and only lets out when no one's looking, but when they're alone, he lets her see it. Just a little. Sigh.

Also, I kind of like that it's such unchartered territory wrt canon. Like GOD my kingdom for more coldwest scenes, but also, the fact that we get to see so little of them together on screen means that there is so much to explore there, and canon cannot tell me no (like it would stop me anyway haha). It really does give me free reign to think about how they would interact and what kind of scenarios they'd get involved in.

Oh yeah, and I also think they're both extremely hot and I wanna see them bang seven ways to Sunday, so there's that

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

I don't really know. It's such a small ship, I don't really know what opinions are out there haha. Hm... I guess maybe that I think Iris would call him babe. Cos generally Len is NOT a petname person and I think if anyone else tried to call him babe, he would make them regret it, but with Iris, he's like a cat being pet and secretly liking it but pretending not to... he's like "I'll allow it. Maybe." but secretly smug like yes. I am babe

Send me a ship and I'll answer three questions based on whether I ship it or not

[stanwixbuster]

Things That (Should) be Happening in 2023

You can also read and boost this on itch.

I've gone back and forth over making a post (or chain thereof) like this for some time, but always flaked out on some lazy excuse of "I like dropping things with no warning for the surprise factor," and "Being scared of accountability."

And, yeah, project jumpscare is fun for a while but I'm starting to feel left out of the cycle of teasing little bits of what you're working on for people to comment on. Before that felt pointless because I had no comments point blank, but now I've got a few eyes on my stuff it feels like a decent time as any to start. One game even got fanart. Wild.

I'm currently on the forth of this cycle, so I'm riding it and making a full deal of it. If it ends up I hate doing this I'll just stop and never acknowledge it again. 

Here's things that (should) be happening this year.

I'm Exhibiting at WASD Curios

Yeah I still don't believe this either, and ENGLAND ON FIRE got accepted into the WASD Live "weird" indie selection.

I'm going to be at WASD in person at the Curios booth from March 31st to April 1st. If you're going, feel free to drop by and say hi. I'll be handing out some pins if you do.

The PC Problem

As some of you may or may not be aware, I'm currently without my main PC. Most of my stuff was left with my parents when I moved down on a short let, and I am living in what feels like a closet right now and only have access to a chromebook that stutters trying to open discord. Lack of Windows aside, next to no computing power puts intensive game dev out of the question. It can barely survive bitsy once projects start getting chunky.

Fortunately, I'm completely unimpeded doing pure writing, which does work out nicely for me. The games I make spend well over 90% of their time in google docs, and only leave it to get shoved into an engine at the last minute. And for the last 10%, I'm lucky enough to work a job where I can fuck about for an hour on a stupidly powerful PC. 

The good: for the games you guys are used to seeing from me, I can make these mostly unimpeded, if not a little slower than usual. Once I get used to the new workflow, it should be business as usual. The bad: this locks me out of doing any complex projects, of which I had several I wanted to take a crack at. This is annoying, for now, but I have enough in mind to keep me occupied—

Until the PC Comes Back

I've got a series of Quinn & Flynn sequels in the works, and this will fill the gap until I get my PC back. Currently, it's looking like a series of 5 games including the first (and even as I'm writing this now, I'm looking at my notes and a tentative 6th). I'm also not making any guarantees that all of them will be released by the time my PC is back, but I will make a guarantee that the run will be finished, at some point, and probably later compiled in omnibus form.

The series is also headed into adult-only territory. There's going to be on-screen sex and no real way to dodge it that doesn't impact the narrative. My apologies if you were under 18 and wanted more Quinn content but also congratulations to the sickos who want more stories with cum.

The 2nd game is going to follow Elias' POV. What happens, you'll have to wait until it comes out.

Pun not intended. I just noticed this while proofreading.

The PC Returns

So, the PC is back, and now I can work on those bigger projects I keep mentioning. Right now, I've got two I've been rotating in my mind and getting increasingly mad I can't pull together.

The first, in full spirit of what inspired it, would be a not-quite remake, and a not-quite sequel, of one of the most popular games I've made so far. I had a whole stack of cut content I wanted to put in that I couldn't because of the jam time limit, and now I want to redo it from the ground up in a bitsy-like engine that's far more flexible. We might even see the old Spdrcstl Special and have multiple engines glued together. You'll have to wait and see what that inspires.

The second is going to be a Proper Game. As in, something with a play time well over a couple hours. It's a Narrat game and leaning hugely into the disco-like mechanics. I'm planning to have enough content to sell it for about 10 quid or so, with the obvious caveat that I don't give a shit if you steal it if you can't afford it.

You'll be a paranormal investigator, tasked to a rural town in Cheshire where, to no rational explanation, buildings have been disappearing. The big twist, however, hinges on how you approach the case. A sceptic in this town may get a completely different story to the superstitious. It's on you to see where belief takes you.

This is going to be extremely heavy, British, and Northern. CWs abound for this one.

Since we're on a wider timescale and I'm still unsure when my beloved returns to me, I have no guarantees I can make here. At the very least, I'd like the first game to be fully released, and the second to have a demo that runs to the end of day one. Keep your eyes peeled.

Other Bits

This bit's a dumping ground. These are projects that have been floating around my head or I have some notes for down already. I decided to throw these here in case one or two make you go "Hey, that sounds cool, line it up next."

These, in no particular order, are:

A wiki-style game a-la Excalibur. I'm planning one in the same universe and as compliment to No Saints Go to Heaven. The main problem is I've gone Motherfucker Unlimited on the worldbuilding of this setting, and beyond that being a task in itself is filtering it all through an in-universe lens. Happening, but a while out. And speaking of—

No Saints Go to Heaven, in a full demo form. I still want to tack bullet hell quasi-rhythm game battles onto it and see if people like it. The problem being this requires a musician and probably a dedicated programmer who knows what they're doing, so this one may be out of the question for a while, as dearly as I love it.

Something with the 12 Cannettes engine. It captivated me the instant I played it and I've been desperate to make a game. I've got something in mind already, but might wait for a jam to fully flesh it out.

Something with Decker. Need to play with this to see where the limits are but I promised myself I would try it after having to pass on Decker Jam. Pending experimentation.

A web engine. It will let you make point and click adventures in the same style as the Club Penguin PSA missions. I am deadly serious about this. Pending more web dev knowledge.

A Len'en fan game. This is literally just that sentence in turns of planning, but I'll make one as soon as an idea comes around. I am very normal about Len'en.

Something using King Gizzard's Polygondwanaland. It's CC0. Album of all time. Have to. Pending what I'm actually going to do with it.

Other Other Bits

Also known as "Stan has a back-and-forth debate over starting a kofi and/or patreon or not."

On one hand, it feels a bit iffy when I have a fulltime job. That money could be going to devs who fully need it rather than me, you know? On the other hand, people are free to spend their money how they want, and extra pizza money sounds decent.

If I do the patreon route I haven't got any ideas for it beyond it being a glorified tip jar that auto-renews. Maybe down the line when I'm working on a Proper Game that has enough meat for update posts it could be a bonus dev log. But if I were to start it up, like, tomorrow, it would be a glorified tip jar.

aight

I think that's about it, for now. I need to put a disclaimer that any and everything mentioned in this post is subject to jam inspiration, scoping, Shiny New Tool syndrome, random hyperfixations, explosions (figurative), explosions (literal), "I didn't feel like it"-itus, and other bullshit under the helpful label of Life.

With that said, Elias & Flynn is definitely happening.

Have a good one.

[justanotherghostwriter]

Dear @coffeepotcat. It was my privilege to be your gift-giver for the @secret-cyborg event this year!

Under the cut, you'll find a fanfic set in a happy-ending aftermath of the Cyborg Soldier episode "When You Wish Upon a Shooting Star"/"From Here to Eternity".

It features some (hopefully) fluffy brother-family-team bonding between 002 and 004, with 009 being the mischievous little brother instigator of family cohesiveness. It also does feature some injury recovery mentions for both 002 and 009, and mentions of death, self-sacrifice and grief. I tried to keep the latter two brief, though, so as not to impede the found family fluff. I really hope that you enjoy!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Officially: screw the idea of gratitude over being alive. 002 was going to bitch about things that deserved being bitched about. And crutches? Crutches fell into one of the top tiers of Deserving of Bitching About. He’d gotten used to maneuvering the wheelchair they’d found for him quickly and, after days of having to lie around in bed, any form of restored mobility had been a relief to the crawling he swore he could feel under his skin. He’d thought that Gilmore slapping some prototype legs on him would have been a nice step forward, pun stolen from 007, regardless of how many times the doctor had gone on about the damage done to 002’s body and the fact that they’d have to do a lot of trial and error with the constructed-from-scratch legs, especially as 002 continued to heal first and then get used to the new grafts.

A stumble forward was more like it. Where the wheelchair had brought bruised fingers when he misjudged a doorway, the crutches seemed to get caught on everything. Including his half-working new legs. It was infuriating, and he knew some people had it worse, and he knew that it was only a pure miracle 001 had had enough power to stop the crash-landing from outright killing both him and 009, but 002 was not going to deny the absolute ass of it all even in the face of the relief.

What was really raining on his — completely justified! — honest assessment of the circumstances was, of course, 009’s reaction to everything. Joe had come out with most of his external structure fine, thanks to fancy technology and updates that hadn’t been around when 002 was first built. But things had gone wrong on the inside, somewhere between the Yomi battle and the Robot Turned Spaceship battle and the freefalling through space, leaving the younger cyborg weak, perpetually freezing and often struggling for breath from a crushed windpipe Gilmore was tearing his hair out trying to heal. But it wasn’t because of the damaged throat that 009 complained less. Oh, no; he was just one of those infuriatingly demure and positive patients.

When he wasn’t trying to undo all his healing by pushing himself far beyond his limits, of course.

But, this time, there was no threat to serve as an excuse for 009 to hop over some steps of recovery. Just an uncertain, slightly shell-shocked, somewhat-grieving somewhat-celebrating group of fellow human war experiments. While 002 told it as it was, 009 hid his face behind his bangs, insisted he was fine and grit his teeth to swallow the shame and frustration when it did arise.

Once, he’d grit them so hard that he’d accidentally activated his acceleration switch. It was the first time since the Yomi mess had started that everybody laughed as one: first at 009 and the comical, horrified shock on his face where he’d gone tumbling. Then at 006’s cry-laughing. Then at 007 mocking all of their laughter styles. Then just... because they could. Maybe because they had to.

Aside from that memorable incident, and one or two other moments of cautiously pushing the envelope a little when 002 assumed the underlying emotions were getting almost too much to control, 009 was complacent and as self-reliant as he possibly could be.

Which was why 002 was wobbling down to Dr Kozumi’s sitting room, tripping over his legs and the crutches and getting what felt like under-arm blisters from the whole ordeal. Because Joe, through his bangs, had quietly asked if 002 could please sit with him, because even the fire that 006 made and all the blankets they piled him under weren’t helping, and they still gave off something akin to body heat, as cyborgs, which might help. And, hell, cuddling a guy on a sofa was not exactly how 002 wanted to spend the afternoon but...

But he couldn’t get the image of 009, shivering violently in the sickbed to his right, back when he’d been more out-of-it than awake. And 005 walking in and asking, so gently, if he could carry 009 inside, where there was a fire. It had happened so many times after that, but that first one... it stuck. The worry beaming off of everybody, and his own helplessness — hadn’t managed to save Joe, hadn’t managed to help him then — and the memory of how 003 sounded when she sobbed for 009 and the look on 009’s face all cemented themselves deep.

Plus... Joe had asked. The rarity made it something precious, and something Jet couldn’t deny. Especially because he was, actually, grateful to be alive. And almost more grateful that 009 was alive, too.

Of course, when 002 fumbled his way into the sitting room, out of breath and as frustrated as he was viciously triumphant, there was no 009 in sight.

004 was sitting on the couch, though, a book open in one hand and his eyebrow raised in 002’s direction.

“Where’s 009?” 002 asked, anger clipping his words.

“Hmmm. So you got told the same story, huh?”

It took 002 half a beat too long to understand. “He told y—? I’m going to kick his ass.”

“Are you going to ask him to sit on the floor in front of you to do it?” 004 asked, beginning to smirk.

002 glared at him, temper crackling. “I can, and I will, kick his ass in a way that — ah, shit —”

Stupidly, he’d lifted a crutch to brandish it, threateningly. And that tipped his balance completely, leaving him to slow-fall, windmilling the whole way, until he was on his butt on the floor, slightly sprawled.

“I’m listening, you can keep going,” 004 said, smirking widely.

002 responded by giving him the finger, humiliation and rage both heating his face and why did they still have the ability to blush? Surely that should have been engineered the hell out. 004 got up, languidly, stretched, and then sauntered over to offer 002 a hand up. His smirk was slightly softer. More knowing. 002 cursed at him, but then took his hand and allowed the other man to haul him up, steady him, and then help him wordlessly to the sofa, where he collapsed to regroup.

And then there was silence. Not awkward, exactly, but still tenser than it had been. Than it usually was between them, unless they were in the middle of a serious disagreement. It just felt, all of a sudden, like there was too much to say, and 002 realised that they hadn’t talked since everything had gone down. He hadn’t even seen 004 around, recently.

“I thought you’d left,” he commented.

“No,” 004 said, still reading. “I was just... helping out in other ways. In other places.” He shot 002 a crooked grin that made 002 uneasy at once. It was self-depreciating in a way that made warning bells start to ring in 002’s head. “Might have shot either one of you for being your own particular brands of annoying.”

Usually, 004 was a bit of a puzzle to figure out. But this one was easier than most, because 002 had had a lot of time of lying about and thinking and remembering and processing what had happened in the Yomi Kingdom. And he remembered 004, straight-backed, fury so cold it looked emotionless, as he faced 009 and offhandedly said how he’d managed to shoot Van Vogt.

“009... doesn’t think less of you. For shooting Van Vogt. You know that, right?” Joe was a bleeding heart, but he wasn’t a naive idiot. Evil was evil, and deserved to go straight back to the slime pits of hell. 004 stared down at the book. “He was just...” 002 struggled with the words, not knowing himself how to phrase it. Joe hadn’t wanted Albert to have the bitter taste of revenge coat that moment, he supposed. 009 was still too black and white for all of that.

“I know. We’ve chatted. I thought him asking me here...” 004 trailed into silence for a few beats, and then sighed and snapped his book shut. “He doesn’t,” he repeated, as though reassuring himself. “But it still happened. I’m... angry.” 002 pressed his lips together, one part of him in solidarity, and the other painfully aware of how alien 004’s experience was to him. “We’ve... won. I guess. For now. Until the next... I’m angry,” he snarled, hands curling into fists, metal creaking somewhat. “At Van Vogt. At Black Ghost. At you.”

002 reeled back a little in shocked surprise. “At me? What the hell.” Surprise, hurt, shame, defensiveness, bitter rage all catalysed into his glare. 004 met it without flinching. “That is not fair. I did everything I could. I— I...”

“Didn’t think.” Albert’s voice was more measured, but no less heavy. “What would we have done if you’d died, huh?”

“003 wasn’t crying over me.”

“So that means it was fine?”

002 wished he could get to his feet easily. Having this confrontation sitting down was making his chest tight like he hadn’t felt in... years. “You,” he snarled, “Cannot seriously be the one lecturing me about self-sacrifice and not caring about what happens to the team if I die.”

“I think I’m uniquely able to talk about it, actually,” 004 snarled right back. His arms were crossed, shoulders visibly tense as he continued to lean against the back of the couch.

002 switched tactics. “It could happen any time. Battles kill people. Look at how suddenly we nearly lost 008.”

“That’s the point.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means that the whole freakin’ universe wants to take us out. So we shouldn’t be helping them. It means that at any moment, we could lose anybody. Anybody. Without warning. So we have to think and do all we can to protect one another. This team. This family. Every member. It means that you’re part of us, whether you like it or not.” 004 swallowed and broke eye contact. For a moment, he was silent. When he spoke again, his voice was cut glass, and 002 had a dawning impression that 004 wasn’t only lecturing 002, but himself as well. “You’re an important part of this family, Jet.” The first name cut through the growing defensive anger, leaving 002 with nothing except vague guilt and upset. “And you wouldn’t have been able to help him. You had to have known this. But you went anyway. To die. Knowingly.”

“I thought I could — ” But 004’s face stopped the familiar lie. “I hoped I could save him. But... but I... I didn’t...” With a snarl of frustration, he scrubbed at his face and then buried his fingers in his hair. “Out of nowhere one day 009 came to me and asked about the acceleration mode. Asked me if... if anything about it had ever made me feel... lonely. I told him no, weirdo, or whatever but... but it stuck with me. And then, when they were dying, all the sisters wanted was to reach one another and I...” He swallowed. “I couldn’t let him die alone.”

004 exhaled, loud and shaky. And then silence, thick but no longer oppressive, blanketed them.

“I’m sorry about Vena,” 002 said, quietly.

Another audible exhale. “Yeah.”

002 slumped back. 004 played with his book a little. “So. You’re not leaving?” 004 eventually asked.

002 shrugged. “Maybe for a bit. To go visit. I promised. But... No.” He glanced at Albert. “You?”

“Nah. Maybe for a vacation or so when you lot drive me absolutely crazy. But...”

But. Things were different, this time. None of them wanted to disperse like they had when they first thought they’d destroyed Black Ghost. And, even back then, they’d all been one moment away from regrouping. There was very little out there in the world for him, Jet realised with a small pang. Maybe, in a few years, there wouldn’t be anything at all.

“Ready to go find 009?”

002 scoffed. “Yeah. That asshole.”

004 waited for him to get himself to his feet, and matched his pace as they shuffled together toward the deck. They found 009 in one of his favourite spots, basking in the sunshine and wearing a coat that could only have been one of 007’s thrift store finds, it was that hideous.

“What the hell was that?” 002 snapped at him, and 009 opened one eye to look at him, all Butter Couldn’t Melt In My Mouth. “Made me walk all the way to the damn sitting room and then you’re not there?”

“What’s the game?” 004 echoed, arms crossed.

009 gave a crooked smile. “One Father used to play with us when he wanted us to talk about things. The, um, priest, I mean.”

Like they didn’t know whom he was referring to. Like they didn’t know too much about each other. 002 thought of Joe’s orphan friends — his only sort-of-family from before — who had been turned into cyborgs. He suddenly realised that Albert had referred to them as a family, and it hadn’t even struck him as strange. On the tail end of that revelation came another: there was nothing much left in the world out there, but everything for him in this ramshackle group of idiots, morons and annoyances.

He would do anything for them. And they for him. And the line, he guessed Albert had been trying to teach him, just had to be one that was a negotiated give-and-take. Because that’s what family did.

“Don’t know what you were hoping for. This idiot just fell down, is all. How did you even get out here?”

“GB, before he left,” Joe admitted, and the coat’s owner was all-but-confirmed.

“Well, come on, I don’t have all day to stand here being messed about by you. And don’t think I’m staying to keep you warm, now.”

Joe only grinned, fond and bright, and began levering himself to his feet. Despite his words, and the almost ever-present annoyance, Jet found himself starting forward on instinct, ready to help. Albert beat him to it, and Joe accepted the hand up that stayed, as support, to lead him back to the sitting room. The silence was, finally, light and easy, though there were moments of twisted shadows as Joe wavered and Jet banged into things like a blind one-hour-old colt.

By the time they got to the fire, Joe’s breathing was laboured, and it was with a grim-faced worry that Albert settled him down and dumped the blankets on him. Joe was back to insisting he was fine, but 002 sat beside him, anyway, since he was there already and all. They talked about Albert’s book, and then GB’s plans for books, and then the movie theatre in town and if it was showing anything good, and then movies that they liked growing up. Joe faded very quickly, and Jet found himself playing pillow as well as space-heater.

“Shut up,” he said, quietly, to Albert’s smirk. “He cannot still be cold...” But he could feel the unnatural chill against him, and hear the raspy breathing, and so he didn’t begrudge the slightly uncomfortable position, or the heat of the fire. “Thought Japanese people hated physical affection. Makes sense we got the defective, cuddly one in a million,” Jet grumbled.

“Black Ghost is notoriously good at finding the worst possible candidates for ruthless soldiers.” Jet blinked at Albert’s words, and the German laughed. “Look at our team. How many pacifists and golden hearts do we have on it?”

Jet thought for a moment. And then snorted. “Wow. They really should have done background checks.”

“I’m pretty sure you and I would have been the only two to make the cut. Maybe 008...”

Jet rolled his head so he could see more of where Albert was reading through Joe’s wild stack of hair, made wilder by the sea spray. “You’re a marshmallow on the inside,” he said, with a heatless sneer. “Complete sap.” Albert looked up at him, sharply, a scowl forming. “And we need you on this team, too, okay? In this family.” He blurted it before he could think twice about it, emboldened by Joe hiding his face somewhat. He’d never had to do emotional brotherhood speeches. Sue him. But he knew, regardless, that this was important. “So... you know. What’s good for me, is good for you.”

They had a bit of a stare-down for a moment, and then Albert nodded. Just once. Small. Slightly defeated, entirely brimming with hope.

And then he went back to reading, mechanical hands turning the page so gently, and Jet went back to trying to keep Joe warm, and he daydreamed about all of them going to take a picnic on the beach on a good day, and all the horrendous shenanigans that would ensue because they turned one another into delinquents when there was no threat to turn them serious.

Jet was looking forward to it.

[chocolatepot]

Peer reviewing @adickaboutspoons's tags because I agree:

#I hate saying this but I kind of feel like you can't use Izzy intruding on morning after brekkie as evidence of Izzy overstepping boundaries#because there's ample evidence of the crew just coming into Stede's quarters whenever the hell they feel like it in Season 1 and it's nbd#Lucius comes in to bitch about Blackbeard's crew when Stede is recovering in 1x4#Frenchie comes in with the invitations in 1x5. Buttons wakes Stede from a sound sleep in 1x6#Olu apparently felt fine asking to bunk down on the couch in 1x8 and Lucius (again) entered without knocking to check on stalker Stede#Ed dumped his leathers off the back of the ship. You know - where the wheel is.#And the ship was shortly pulling in to dock. So reasonably there would have been someone at the wheel so the ship didn't crash.#People shorting sails & hauling lines & all that stuff you do to dock a ship. We shouldn't have to be shown it to infer it being done.#So Ed was doing this with an audience. If he wanted privacy he could have just chucked them out the bathroom window.#It's not unreasonable for Izzy to have been one of the people on deck and seen Ed going back to the cabin with a breakfast trey#and for him to have reasonably inferred that Ed & Stede were awake and prolly not fucking.#So as good a time as any to go in and tell them the ship had reached its destination. Just like anyone else would have in S1.#I don't wanna defend Izzy anymore. It makes me feel sick in my tum#It IS gross and invasive for him to have commented on their sex life like that#But here's the thing#I 100% would not have had a problem with that line if it had come from Lucius#I prolly even would have considered it a sign of him healing from his trauma and re-gaining his sense of self#Maybe even a sign he was on the road to forgiving Ed by giving him a good-natured ribbing about his relationship with Stede#the way he used to be the guy who was allowed to be blunt about their relationship and get away with it#It's not that there's a problem with the line or with invading the lovebird's privacy in and of itself#The problem is that it's Izzy. And it's because he hasn't done done the legwork (if you'll excuse he pun)#to prove that he's earned this easy banter or emotional intelligence#THAT'S what's Stede's reacting adversely to. Izzy behaving in a way that's wildly OOC & pretending that he has every right to say that shit#It's why he's so bitchy with Izzy later when he tries to be Mr. Emotional Support after the breakup.#Is Izzy also steamrolling boundaries? Yes. But that's just par for the course.#Stede's reaction isn't highlighting that it's wrong because from anyone else it would be fine

idk whether this is a little sick of me but i kind of love the scene in man on fire where izzy interrupts them in bed. bc izzy acts like its normal and ed acts like its unwelcome but normal and stede is like what the fuck are you doing in here. like ik a lot of ofmd’s jokes are set up like “here’s one or two people doing something situationally inappropriate and here’s one or more people reacting to it in a way that drives home how inappropriate it is” so it’s not surprising that’s the structure used here, but it’s not the only possible permutation of it; i could just as easily see stede being unsurprised and ed being vocal about feeling intruded upon (ed’s been used a few times before to calibrate the audience’s idea of what the appropriate attitude in a given situation should be, and also izzy and stede both have demonstrated peculiarities in the way they approach interactions with others, albeit in completely opposite directions—if the writers wanted to strengthen a feeling later in the episode of them finding some common ground to build an actual friendship on then uniting them in weirdness here would do some work to sell that) or izzy could have been put off to see them in bed like that and then over the course of the exchange evolve out of his discomfort to appreciate how happy and content ed looks. which i think would add something to his later scene with ed.

anywayyyu thats not my point at all though. what i like about the scene is that stede’s playing the outside observer to ed and izzy’s relationship and what he’s observing is “wow izzy’s kind of invasive of ed’s privacy” meanwhile ed mumbles “fuck off” but makes no move to ask for privacy himself and furthermore expresses a complete lack of surprise later on at the fact that izzy was watching him on deck that morning. despite these scenes happening so close to the end of izzy’s arc i feel like they offer you a lot to infer about his pre-canon dynamic with ed. it’s juicy. it’s nauseating. it’s all i could have ever asked for

[chimielie]

You're just trying to get back to your room.

It's misty outside for the first time in days, and your hair is doing weird things because you just woke up, and it's laundry day, so you're wearing the best combination you could find of strangely-patterned sweats and a sports bra as a shirt.

And you're doing your laundry, so you have to go all the way downstairs and back up again. Back up again, however, seems to have been roadblocked by a wall of leggy, perfectly unmade-made-up girls who are all coming back at nine in the morning from someplace unknown and mystical, smelling of coconut body spray.

"Excuse me," you try, your voice maybe too quiet as you attempt to sound less than annoyed. A few of them move out of the way, and you walk past gratefully, only to be stopped short as the tallest, coconuttiest, perfectest one rocks back right into your path, bubbling over giggling like celebratory champagne. You don't have to look to know who it is that made her laugh like that, where she's coming back from.

You stand, staring, for a moment, involuntarily comparing her side profile to your own, the way her hair is piled up in a messy bun girls on Wattpad in 2012 would envy. She doesn't even notice you, still addressing a rapt audience, and you feel much, much smaller than you should.

Blessedly, someone says her name, an abbreviated, fond version of it, and she glances at you and moves out of the way. You mutter "thanks," and sidle through, though there's not enough space in the tight hallway to avoid bumping your knee into someone else.

"Sorry," Kuroo says, and despite how hard you’ve been trying not to look at him, you just have to.

Your eyes scrape over his stupid high school hoodie, his growing stubble, his piercing eyes. His hair’s a mess and your chest grows tight imagining why. There's something awful growing in there, vines you can feel growing offshoots that you cannot let burst out.

Part of you is indignant, insisting that you shouldn’t feel like a mouse in the presence of all these popular people, that you have self worth beyond cowering beside the queen bee. The rest of you shivers, remembering that you have every reason to feel guilty around her, that you’re the other woman.

You try not to think about how the reaction is more due to remembering the night you fucked her boyfriend than anything.

You hadn’t carried on any lascivious, secretive affair with Kuroo. It had been a one-night stand before they’d gotten together. The night they’d gotten together.

You’d found yourselves in the same social circle after the frantic rush to make friends during the first week of university, and he was the handsomest thing you’d ever seen, just between man and boy. You’d pushed—hard—to get closer to him, signed up for the things he liked, didn’t make too much fun of his awful chemistry puns or taste in bands. You’d lingered in his life, been the last one in his room, late at night, and his roommates weren’t coming back.

You’d woken up, sore and a little embarrassed (you were pretty sure they couldn’t build walls thick enough) but as weightless and joyful as the dawn. He was still dead to the world, so you’d climbed out of bed and hustled back to your room with the full intention of texting him later in the day.

Mere hours later, the news had come through like wildfire.

You’re pretty sure they’re not official, that boyfriend and girlfriend are titles only used in your head, but everyone knows they are capital T Together.

You feel silly whenever you watch him out your window, back arched and eyes narrowed as he hits a perfect spike playing volleyball in the green. You were the one who left before he woke up; you who had promised him a one-night-stand.

Still, something in you screams that he was yours first.

He's looking at you like maybe you'll respond, spit out a joke, pretend like you haven't lost your mind jumping into something you didn’t understand. You don’t stay long enough to read his face; you duck your head and go.

He waves a half-assed wave at your back. You have eyes in the back of your head, it seems, because you can’t help but wave back.