#this is the most em shit i've ever seen

[sanguineterrain]

Hey, I love your writing, your Jason fics are always so tender and authentic

I was wondering if you would write something where Reader is pulled aside by someone and asked whether they're in danger (since Jason is pretty big and intimidating) and later they laugh it off because they find it absurd but it gets to Jason and perhaps brings some insecurities to the surface

this is actually devastating!!! thank you for requesting 🤌

jason todd x gn!reader. tw: wrongly assumed abuse and jason being gutted at the idea, hurt/comfort, reassurance, estab relationship.

****

"Chocolate is obviously superior."

Jason sighs, flopping against the diner booth dramatically. "What a shame to be so wrong. Vanilla stays on top."

"Vanilla is boring as hell, Jay," you say, throwing your napkin at him. He catches it. Of course. "On the milkshake hierarchy, vanilla is barely a step above whatever monstrosity a peppermint bark shake is."

"Buddy, I happen to like drinking toothpaste." He points a finger at you. "And that's my God-given right."

"It's an abomination is what it is." You take a long, pointed sip of your shake. "Mm, the taste of good choices."

Jason traps both of your legs between his under the table. You gasp and try to wiggle free, but his strength is merciless.

"If it's an abomination, why is it on the menu?" he asks, grinning as you squirm.

"Well, what else are they meant to serve you freaks?"

Jason gently tugs you forward by your legs. He leans over the table. You meet him halfway.

"This freak appreciates the thought," he says and kisses you.

He tastes like vanilla shake. It's not what you'd order, but you really don't mind kissing it off of Jason's mouth. Funny how that works.

He pulls away and releases your legs, then scoots out of the booth.

"Gonna take care of business. Don't drink my incredibly irresistible shake."

"I'll certainly try," you say, looking up at him with what are undoubtedly giant heart eyes.

Jason disappears to the restrooms. You drink your shake and focus on trying to craft the straw wrapper into a snake.

You're close to shaping it when a woman comes up to your table. You've never seen her in your life.

"Uh, hi," you say. "Can I help you?"

She glances around the diner before leaning down.

"Hey. Look, if you're... in need of someplace safe, there's a great shelter downtown."

Your brows rise. "I'm sorry?"

"I was in your shoes once too," she says, eyes wide. "You don't have to rely on a guy to get you on your feet. Especially someone like him."

You shake your head slowly. "I... what? I don't understand. The man I'm with, he's my boyfriend."

She looks skeptical. You turn to face her fully, because now you're properly bewildered.

"Uh, I appreciate that you're looking out for people, and I know stuff you're referring to is everywhere in Gotham. But I promise I'm okay."

"I know physical intimidation is scary—"

"Whoa." You hold up a hand. "Just because he's a big guy doesn't mean he's throwing me around. He's the gentlest man you'll ever meet. I love him and he loves me. No one is in danger."

The woman's mouth pinches. You don't even have it in you to be upset. You've never once felt afraid of Jason. But you forget how he looks to others, how he's twice or triple most people's size and covered in scars.

"Here's the number to the shelter," she says, slipping the paper under the salt shaker. "In case you change your mind."

She hurries out the door before you can respond. You stare at the card, then shrug. You suppose, if anything, you're happy there are still good Samaritans in Gotham.

Presently, Jason returns. He purposely makes his footsteps heard because of the countless times you've lectured him about scaring the shit out of you due to his habit of going stealth mode without realizing.

"Hello, dearest," he says. "I've returned from war."

"My hero. Did you wash your hands in battle?"

Jason slides into the booth and sticks his hand in your face. "Smell 'em and rejoice, baby."

You take his hand and give it a deep sniff. It indeed smells like soap. Not that you ever doubted your boyfriend's handwashing capabilities.

"Smells like... wrong opinions about milkshakes," you say, then kiss his palm.

He rolls his eyes. "I can see my absence has taught you nothing. Unfortunate."

"I'm stubborn. I'm sure you of all people can understand that," you say, smiling.

"Mm. Y'lucky you're cute."

Your food arrives, the waitress cheerily informing you that she hopes you enjoy your meal.

"I think she's the happiest person in Gotham," Jason says, shaking the ketchup bottle.

You take a fry from his plate. "Probably a Metropolis native."

"Y'know my fries are the exact same as yours, right?"

"Nope," you say. "Yours have special boyfriend cooties on them. Adds flavor."

"You're gross," Jason says, quite lovingly.

You make a heart with your hands. He returns it, then takes a bite of his burger.

You don't even register it when Jason grabs the salt shaker. You're zeroed in on your lunch and don't look up until he speaks.

"What's this?"

Jason's holding the shelter hotline card.

"Oh! Some lady came over and gave that to me."

"Gave it to you?"

You should clock Jason's tone and the way he's stopped eating completely. But the experience was so odd that you can't fathom Jason thinking it as anything but a mistake.

"Yeah. For some reason, she thought I was here drinking a milkshake with you against my will. Probably 'cause it's Gotham, and you're my BBB: big beefcake boyfriend. Little does she know, I'm the heavyweight boxing champion of Park Row."

You swirl your fries in Jason's ketchup. He doesn't even blink. Usually, he'd give you a raised eyebrow and pretend he's cross.

Jason's still staring at the card. You catch his legs with yours. He doesn't look up.

"Jay?" you ask, smile fading. You drop your legs. "Hey. Y'good?"

"Hm? Oh. Sorry, baby." He puts the card aside and smiles at you, quick and strained.

"Everything okay?" you ask.

"Yeah. Uh, fine."

"Jason." You lean over and grab his hand. "What's wrong?"

He swallows. You wait, the noise of the diner fading. All that matters is whatever's causing his absolutely heartbreaking expression.

"How could she think I'm hurting you?" Jason whispers, finally looking at you. "How could—I would never hurt you."

"Oh, Jay. Honey, that's why I hardly entertained her. It was so silly to think about. I was so puzzled at first that I couldn't even decipher what she meant."

"But what if... y'know, maybe she sensed something about me. Sensed violence. I get it. I'd–I'd be scared of me if I were a regular person."

"Jason, sweetie, no. No, no, no. I think that woman experienced some hard things in her life, and that caused her to see something that wasn't there. She had good intentions, but she was absolutely wrong. I know you have a past, but I've never felt unsafe with you. Never. I could never be afraid of you."

Jason gnaws on the inside of his cheek. You get up and slide in next to him, crowding him against the wall. You curl against his arm.

"You love me so well, I forget that most people see a monster when I walk down the street," he says.

You squeeze your eyes closed. Pins in your heart.

"You're not a monster, Jay. You're good. I know it. Your family knows it. You're a protector."

He takes a deep breath. "If–if you ever felt afraid of me, ever, and you wanted me to stay away, then you tell me so, and I'd leave you alone. No questions asked."

"Jason," you whisper. You wrap your arm around his neck and pull him close. The vinyl squeaks as you shift. "Jay, I love you. I don't want you to leave me alone."

"But if—"

"No. Please listen to me. I know you'd never hurt or frighten me. Sometimes, people are wrong. She was wrong about you. She was kind but wrong."

You sit like that for a bit, feeling each other breathe. Jason's hand grazes yours. You grab it, lacing your fingers together.

"I love you too," he says quietly. "Never felt anything but love for you."

You smile and steal another fry off his plate. He snorts.

"I know." You lean against his shoulder. "Never doubted it."

[amhrosina]

Be My Baby

Summary: Frank takes you on a weekend trip to his cabin after you have a rough week at work. Your first stop? The enormous bathtub with enough room for soooo many activities.

Pairing: Frank Castle x fem!Reader Word Count: 2.8k

masterlist // join my taglist // follow me on instagram & ao3

a/n: hello! i'm back! my personal life is still a wreck but i missed writing for frank. this is probably the most self indulgent fic i've ever written lol it is quite literally the most ooey-gooey romantic plot before the softest smut imaginable. what can i say? i'm a hoe for soft frank. enjoy & thank you to the nonnie that requested something similar to this!

warnings: softest smut imaginable, fluff to the max, 'i'm an asshole to everyone except you' trope, a teensy little bit of crybaby reader if you squint, frank would burn the world for reader, reader is sOoOoO in love with frank (who isn't??), they're both a little wrapped up in each other's world and don't give a shit about what's happening outside of them type of vibes, pet names, etc.

From what you had seen, Frank’s cabin was cozy and warm, but since your arrival half an hour ago, you’d only had the luxury of soaking in the tub while Frank took care of unloading the car. He’d insisted on doing it alone, claiming his girl shouldn’t have to lift a finger for anything, and honestly after the week you’d had, you were temporarily glad he was as stubborn as a mule. You were sure that sentiment would fade the next time you were feeling bratty, but for now, you tried your best to relax and forget what an awful week it had been at work.

The heat of the bath water sent a wave of goosebumps down your spine, enticing a low groan from your lips. Sinking further into the water, you realized just how big the tub was. It stretched at least six feet across and was almost deep enough to stand, clearly a custom made feature of the cabin. You supposed Frank probably needs the room, being as large a man as he is. Still, it felt like you were in a luxurious hot tub, rather than a regular bathtub.

“There’s a button to turn on the jets if you want ‘em.”

Frank’s gentle voice carried across the bathroom, startling you from your relaxed state. You hadn’t even heard him come in. You turned, eyeing his powerful figure as he made his way toward you and sat on the edge of the tub. It was easy to get lost in the way he moved, and you tried your best to not stare at the muscles straining against the black longsleeve he was wearing.

“You okay?” He asked, reaching out to softly run his knuckles along the curve of your damp cheek. He was always gentle with you, but the desire to take care of you was even more present in his eyes than usual. It really had been a shitty week.

“This place is amazing.” You said in awe, turning your face away to hide your grin. His hand, already knowing what you were trying to do, softly gripped your jaw and turned it back to face him.

“You barely saw the place.” He chuckled.

“Whose fault is that?” You raised an eyebrow at him and sat up, fully exposing your bare chest to him. His eyes briefly flicked down to your nipples, hardening as the cool air touched them, before returning his gaze upwards. “Get in. There’s plenty of room for both of us.”

He nodded and stood, but began walking in the opposite direction of the bath. You furrowed your brow, watching him tug his shirt off and throw it on the counter. When he saw your expression, he grinned.

“Hang on. I brought something for you.”

“What do you mean?” You called after him, but he was already moving again.

He disappeared through the doorway, generating even more confusion, before returning with an assembly of things tucked under his arms. You watched as he worked his way around the room, placing various objects here and there until finally he flicked off the lights and turned to face you again.

The room was now aglow with flickering candle light, coating Frank’s looming figure in a warm haze. He’d gone for mostly unscented, knowing how strong smells could give you headaches, but had left in a few lavender candles because he knew how much it relaxed you. He also managed to sneak an entire bottle of champagne into the car without you noticing, of which he was pouring into two flutes. You blinked back tears as he handed you your glass, unable to express how warm your chest felt at the effort he was putting in to make you feel better.

“Frank.” You murmured, smiling bashfully, “This is the nicest thing anyone’s ever done for me.” 

“‘s what you deserve.” He shrugged, stepping out of the rest of his clothes. 

He sank into the tub next to you, tugging your body against his in a swift motion. He sat with his back against the edge, allowing you to easily settle your knees on either side of his thighs, facing him in the dim room. You sat just a little taller than him at this angle - chest pressed against his warm skin, arms resting on his broad shoulders - and God, he looked divine. The drive had taken a few hours, just long enough for the stubble to return to his cheeks after this morning’s shave, giving him a rugged look that you thought was just so handsome. You were unable to resist the temptation of running your nails over it in a soft scratch, eliciting a groan from deep in Frank’s chest. The rumble reverberated through your chest as you pressed yourself fully against him, seeking more of his affection. He tugged your head down onto his shoulder and began running his fingers along the base of your neck in a soothing pattern.

“You never answered my question earlier.” He murmured, resting his jaw against your head. “You okay, sweet girl?”

You sighed, sucking your bottom lip between your teeth for a moment as you mulled over your feelings. You were a sensitive soul to begin with, and your boss had been on edge all morning when he finally snapped at you for something you had no control over, which ultimately had you tearing up for the rest of the day. When you’d walked through the door crying, Frank’s eyes flashed violently between anger at your boss and sympathy for you. The sympathy had won, and now you were in a beautiful cabin in upstate New York, wrapped in his strong arms. Still, you weren’t sure how you were going to deal with your boss’ temper when you returned to work on Monday.

“I don’t know,” you finally replied, shrugging, “Can you ask me again later?”

You felt his cheeks widen into a small grin. He nodded, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“Don’t think I won’t.” He teased, calling you on your avoidant tendencies before you could even notice them yourself.

“How long have you had this place?” You wondered, nuzzling into his heated skin.

“I bought it a few months after Maria and the kids.” He said softly, almost whispering when he had to relay his wife’s name aloud. “Thought maybe I was done with the city. Change can be good, ya’ know?”

“But you came back.” You lifted your head from his shoulder so you could look him in the eyes. 

“But I came back.” He parroted, nodding. “And then I met you.”

“And you stayed.” You finished for him.

“Of course I stayed. Couldn’t leave you behind, sweet girl. ‘ve been sweet on you since the day I met you.”

This was true. From the moment you’d met, he’d been nothing but gentle and kind toward you. You had no idea, of course, that this type of behavior was incredibly far away from Frank Castle’s usual attitude until you’d met Matt Murdock, who was so shocked at Frank’s subdued personality and general softness around you that Frank had to physically close Matt’s gaping jaw for him.

“But you never sold the place?” You questioned.

“I figured we might need somewhere to run away to every once in a while. Are you mad that I didn’t tell you about it before today? I wanted it to be a surprise.”

For a moment, he looked genuinely worried that he might’ve upset you.

“How could I be mad when I’m sitting in this enormous tub, surrounded by candles and champagne, pressed up against the man of my dreams?”

He smiled then, and you could tell it was a genuine smile because of the way his cheeks dimpled at the corner of his laugh lines. It was an award winning smile, you thought. You gently set the empty champagne glasses on the edge of the tub before cupping his cheeks in your hands.

“My Frankie,” you mumbled, running your thumbs across his cheekbones, “What would I do without you?”

You really hadn’t meant to say that out loud, but every time you looked at him, you felt yourself being pulled closer and closer to him. His compassion and kindness toward you, even after everything he’d been through, was something you couldn’t avoid leaning into. All your life you’d been taking care of others, and finally, here was someone begging to take care of you.

“You don’t have to worry about that, okay? ’m here to stay.” He mumbled, bringing the pads of your fingertips to his lips for individual, soft kisses. “I love you, and ‘m gonna take care of you forever.”

Tears welled in your eyes as an overwhelming rush of emotion passed over you. In your arms was a man that should’ve been bitter and angry at the world around him. He had earned the right to become spiteful and hardened, and no one could fault him for that. And yet - and yet - in your arms was a man that loved you with his entire being. Who understood you at your core, saw the dark parts of you, and loved those parts even more. Who was soft for no one but you. Who you loved, too.

A tear slid down your cheek as you kissed him, long and slow and sensual because you wanted nothing more than to wrap yourself around him and never let go. He smiled into the kiss, cradling your head with his beautiful, calloused hands. It wasn’t enough. You needed his gentle touch everywhere. Pressing yourself against him, you felt yourself sliding along his achingly hard cock, raising the already warm temperature in the room to searing. Heat pulsed between your legs, begging to be touched.

“My pretty girl,” he mumbled against your lips, kissing the corner of your mouth before following the curve of your jawline to your neck, “My pretty, sensitive girl.”

The praise made your head swim. You rocked your hips again, sliding along his length until you were hovering directly over him, waiting for the go ahead to sink down. He grunted, pressing open mouthed kisses up your throat before coaxing your hips lower and lower. You gasped when he finally pushed into you, and Frank took the opportunity to lick the inside of your gaping mouth as he did so. You shuttered against him, wanting everything he had to offer and more.

“P-please, Frankie.” You murmured, arching your back as he bucked his hips upwards.

“Please what, sweetheart?” He breathed, wrapping one of his enormous hands around the back of your head, forcing you to look down at him as you rode him. His other arm was wrapped around your torso, tugging your hips forward and back to stimulate your clit against the base of his cock. It was such an erotic way to be held that you couldn’t stop the tears from flowing down your cheeks. He leaned his head against your forehead and kissed the tears that made their way down your flushed skin. “Tell me, sweet girl.”

“I l-love you.” You purred, stuttering as he made his way down your body, kissing everywhere he could reach. When he got to your pebbled nipples, you sucked in a sharp breath. He knew exactly how to get you off, and he was staring right at them.

“I love you too, pretty girl.” He grinned and pressed a chaste kiss to each of your nipples, eliciting a pornographic moan from deep in your chest. 

He continued to push and pull your hips in a steady rhythm, grinding your clit against his pelvis as you bounced up and down his length. Slowly, in a teasing manner that had a new wave of fresh, needy tears streaming down your cheeks, he leaned forward and circled his tongue around the sensitive nub. You whined with impatience as he pulled away, only to offer the same kitten lick to your other breast. You knew he would take care of you like he always did, but his teasing was making your entire body tremble with anticipation. 

“I know, I know,” he cooed, kissing the valley between your breasts, “‘t’s okay, baby. Be patient. I’ll take care of you.”

You nodded, squeezing your eyes shut as you let out a mewl. You felt the hand Frank had been using to hold your head steady loosen its grip, and suddenly, he was softly wiping the tears away from under your eyes with his thumbs.

“You’re doing so good for me, bunny.” He murmured, and you very nearly came at the pet name he loved to praise you with. “‘m gonna make you feel real good, okay?”

“Please,” you begged, digging your fingers into his shoulders, “Need you.”

That was all it took for Frank to finally snap. In one swift motion, he wrapped his lips around your breast and began to run his tongue across your sensitive nipple. His hand traveled from cradling your cheek to rubbing small, sloppy circles around your pulsing clit. You keened, overcome with so much pleasure that you felt your entire body trembling against Frank’s.

The bathroom was big enough for your soft moans to echo, and other than the sloshing of the bath water, that was the sound Frank heard as you came apart on top of him. Your head was spinning as the heat in your gut finally found its release, uncoiling in waves of overwhelming pleasure that sent you reeling. 

“That’s it,” he breathed, “Just like that, pretty girl. You’re so good for me, baby.”

His fingers hadn’t stopped circling your clit. You were quickly growing overstimulated and conflicted, wanting nothing more than to keep riding him while also needing to get away from his dexterous and sinful fingers. He watched you for a moment, in awe - the way your lips parted every time a moan slipped out of your mouth, the heaving of your chest as your heart rate tried and failed to return to normal, the intense trembling of your limbs every time he circled your clit. He wasn’t worthy. He knew that. He didn’t care. He’d take care of you for as long as you’d let him, and he’d enjoy every second of it.

“F-Frankie,” you stuttered in between heaving breaths, “I can’t- I’m- It’s sensitive.”

“Shh, sh, sh, sh, I know, baby. I know,” he cooed, pressing soft kisses to your collarbone and up your neck, “Can you give me one more, bunny? Be good and give me one more.”

You shuttered against him, resting your forehead against his and breathing out a sultry whine. He continued his onslaught of kisses along your jawline, following the upward curve of your chin until his lips were on yours again. His agile tongue swept into your mouth mid-moan, sending heat into your already molten core.

“Wanna feel you come around me again, baby.” He groaned and tightened his hold around your torso, sweeping his tongue along your bottom lip before capturing your mouth in his again. 

He had brought you to the brink again already. You squeezed around him, earning a rare groan from Frank. The usually stoic and quiet man let out another sinful moan when you arched your back and squeezed again. He was as close as you were to the edge, and God, the tension was palpable. 

Finally, in a moment of pure bliss, he nipped at your bottom lip and let out a soft, barely there whimper, which sent you careening off the edge and into oblivion. You could feel yourself clenching around him as you came, but your head had been sent straight to a euphoric haze. Your heart thundered in your chest as Frank wrapped his arms around your torso and held you tight against his chest, coming inside your sensitive, throbbing pussy. 

You’d both worked yourselves into a haze, high off each other’s touch. The comedown was gentle and warm - soft caresses of each other’s skin, chaste kisses pressed to collarbones and fingertips, thundering heartbeats slowing in unison. The bath water was surprisingly still warm, and you couldn’t help but nuzzle into Frank’s chest with languorous, droopy eyes.

“You okay?” He asked, running his fingers up the length of your spine.

You nodded into his chest, sighing. “I’m perfect.”

“‘m glad.” He responded, kissing your forehead lightly. “‘m sorry you had such a rough week.”

“I’m not.” You giggled, glancing around at the luxurious bathtub you were in. “This place is like a dream.”

He held you tighter against him, resting his chin on your head before responding. 

“You don’t know the half of it, pretty girl.”

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[vaspider]

Any advice for someone thinking about moving to the Pacific Northwest?

That kinda depends on where you are moving to! Here are the things I've found useful to know about moving to Portland:

I moved from Philly, where people tend to be more kind than nice, and here, people are more nice than kind. What I mean by this is that people in Philly will call you a jagoff while pulling over to change your tire in the rain, while people in Portland will smile while they keep driving. (This isn't universal, but it's real.)

Oregon has no sales tax. You'll pay a bunch of different income taxes in April, though, so make sure you pay attention to your mail in the beginning of the year so you get all your local taxes done.

Locals tend not to use umbrellas much. I tend to not just bc the rain is rarely hard enough to require one. Get a good raincoat.

Portland was one of the first places in the US to be wired for home electricity. Therefore, the grid needs upgrades, and a lot of the big lines are not buried as they are in other places and are vulnerable to ice. Make sure you have good home batteries for when we have ice storms.

Ditto, the streets don't get treated for ice. Make sure you have good boots and YakTrax or similar.

Pedestrians don't fucking look before they step out into the street. If people acted in Philly like they act in PDX, they'd get hit. If you're driving in the PNW, act like every pedestrian is about to do the most foolish thing ever.

Ditto PNW drivers. I'd rather drive to EWR on a Friday at 5 pm than try to cross the Willamette at rush hour.

TriMet still has a lot of room for improvement, but it's a lot better than any other city I've lived in. Get your Hop set up when you get here so you know you have money on it and all, even if you don't ride often, just in case.

The Oregon Zoo membership has an exchange thing where every month there are different local places you get free admission to. Getting a membership is generally less expensive than going twice in a year, and also, there's a bunch of other stuff you can do with that membership.

Choose where you wanna live as the place you're gonna do pretty much everything. Portland is largely set up so you can do everything you need within your neighborhood, which is nice. Pretty much the only time that I leave my neighborhood is when I have to go to a specialist doctor or to hang out with my cousins who live in SW or go to a special event.

Portland has a lot of cool shit you can do in your neighborhood - honestly more than I've seen anyplace else I've lived. There are hiking groups and bike rides and soap box derbies and all kinds of shit. Join local FB groups, look for posters... you'll see 'em.

If you consume weed regularly & qualify for a medical card, get one. The taxes on marijuana add up a lot faster than you think.

Some of the best food in Portland is at the strip clubs. No, I'm not joking. There's a law in PDX that if you serve alcohol, you have to serve Real Food, which has led to bars and clubs competing over how good their food is.

Food cart pods are the shit. Research your local food cart pods. You'll get some of the best food you've ever eaten and can take a huge group of people with different food needs to a local food cart pod and just have everyone go to different carts and get their own shit.

Look into who owns your local weed store. There are good Black-owned stores, and one of the most popular "chains" is/was owned by some deeply shady people who essentially bribed one of our Secretaries of State. So it does matter.

Be nice to the crows. There is a huge huge huge local murder & crows tell other crows if you're an asshole or you're cool.

I'm sure there's more stuff, but that's what I can think of while I'm listening to a podcast and my wife is driving us home.

[guardian5tiger3]

1. 2. 3.

And

4. ( Yes, it's a picture of chingy. )

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PICK A GROUP TAROT

1

Basically I think you're single with a big heart / a lot of love to give, and you have a friend that's gay or in a gay relationship or some of you maybe don't even realize if you have a crush that he's gay or has a boyfriend . Or youre in a three way relationship??????? If any of those are true or you literally just know two guys and one of them is similar to you somehow , they are talking about you . And it's possible one or both of them want you to be cut off from them or for you to have to leave something or a place behind . So you could actually be being plotted on in terms of them doing something maybe to get you kicked out of your place or fired ????! Dude if somebody IS in a gay relationship they could actually not be gay they could be straight and be making a mistake ...

WTF is this y'all damn . Looks like you've only been nice as f and in your own vibe . Do y'all have autism ????????? Or want to get checked for it ???! This the most confusing reading I've ever done . Cause it's possible these people are just reading you so effing wrong and being judgemental like for the few of you that that's your case I hope the culprit eats shit cause I especially feel your pain here . This also could be people from your past or something that happened in the past . Dude someone HATES you all cause you're just enjoying what you have or what you have worked for or your own vibe or something . Like why . WTF "with a cherry on top "bitch what the hell . You might have been excluded from a group of friends or something . . .... But you have the best energy though ... Like you're beautiful .uhm the advice is to flex on everyone ever. Just be bold about your vibes and how you look and flaunt it cause it'll mess these people's heads up It would make someone get so mad they'd prolly piss their effing pants hahaha . F k 'em . So that's ...your advice.... Good luck with ... This ....... Just flex on em idk they definitely have at least one or two people that know whoever these dudes are or whatever that look at stuff you post online too if you do or see you at a grocery store possibly??? Or at a restaurant if you're a waitress ..... Y'all get the point you would be seen and you'd have em freaking out ....... Bunch of nerds if you ask me , shoot.

( extra channeling . Someone ate some one ass I think it's these two guys that are gay with each other and it's funny and gross ? ) as if that's my business or anyone's but I think other factors involved make this justifiably hilarious for someone

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2

You are the last one standing in a situation. Channeling the hunger games here . You could be the only person in your own family to ever do something . You might have one best friend ( when I typed this, at this point I accidentally put 😉 this emoji somehow ????? ) or a pet .?

People have tried to delay you or throw obstacles your way or hurt you or something and I don't know that anyone or yourself ever could have imagined whatever destiny you have . It's going to teach a lot of people lessons . People that may have judged you especially if you live your life unconventionally . Whatever your destiny is is kind of shocking but will leave certain people in complete shame . I feel like some people you've dealt with somehow could never ever imagine admitting to being wrong on the level they may have been about you and it will be humiliating and ego shattering for a certain person or people . This is especially true if you tend to avoid conflict , or are a loner, or never experienced a party scene as a teen and young adult , or even like, sleep overs or birthday parties as a kid. You may have always been focused on things no one else really was while everyone else was in a way wasting their time with other things . It's so gonna pay off however the lifestyle similar to what I'm describing is that you've lived .

---------------

3

Y'all seem good but maybe impatient about something or just, the future in general ? . You're either in love with someone OR that's what you're impatient about, your love life . Your soulmate is hurt right now and needs to or had needed to get away from something cause someone had some sharp words towards them not making things any better but making it actively get worse for them emotionally or mentally or physically . Whatever environment either of you are in it's not suitable for the type of love you two would have so there does need to be action taken in terms of fixing the chaotic or bad environment but sometimes it's up to this person to do and you are left maybe bored or inpatient then right ? If you guys want a family - like situation in any way be it just you two , pets , children , whatever . You can absolutely put your focus on preparing for that in any given way that you can .

------------------------

4

You're looking back on the past or rewatching old shows or movies or doing something for nostalgia maybe even eating something you used to . If this is what you're doing right now it's because subconsciously you want yourself to notice something negative that happened around that time . Or in your past generally . Something may have been not obvious enough or straight up going on behind your back or maybe you have blocked out trauma ? It looks like you're alright now but upset about the past . Don't force whatever you're trying to realize or remember but I think reading this might just help with that naturally coming up in your mind at some point . Make sure you don't get too lost in your mind and also consider practicing grounding yourself in the physical present moment . Something positive is about to happen to you . Either you're eating vegetables or you should be . Also look towards foods and activities that are positive for brain health . If you have a dog take the dog for walks or do that for more time or more often at this time . If you have a fish or hamster do not take a pet like that for a walk . Just a little PSA 😉 . there is one very good thing coming to you that might be humbling in a way but it is destined and it is great . It might come to you in the form of good news ? . But I can't say anything more about what it might be . I think the energy youre in now is very telling of what's to come as if youre preparing for something subconsciously. Take care .

[heart-of-the-morningstar]

Corruption fic - First Preview

It’s me, ya girl, comin’ at ya with a little preview! No active warnings for this one ☺️

"That's it, I'm cuttin' you off for tonight," Husk said sternly, whisking away your unfinished glass of whiskey. You'd been at the bar for only an hour and you've already downed 5 full glasses.

"Noooo, Husk c'mon...I'm fffffiiiinnee," you babbled, trying to push your head from the countertop unsuccessfully.

It's been a few months since you arrived in Hell after an unfortunate accident that ended in your early demise. But being a devout believer, you were so sure that Heaven would be your final destination. How wrong you were. You woke up in the fiery pit confused and scared, your body had transformed into that of a demon; you had become something you had feared for your entire life. When you first heard about the Hazbin Hotel, you nearly jumped at the opportunity for redemption. If there was even the slightest hope of getting out of here, you were going to take it. But your situation was more than troublesome, considering how you led your life up on Earth. So most nights, you could easily be found sitting on a bar stool, trying desperately to drown your sorrows and distract yourself from the reality you'd found yourself in.

What's worse...not everyone here is evil. It was ingrained into you that everyone down here in Hell deserved to be, they had earned this punishment. But getting to know some of the other residents at the hotel, that couldn't have been further from the truth! Was everything you were taught just complete lie?! For Heaven's sake, Charlie, the literal princess of Hell, was the sweetest and kindest being you've ever had the pleasure of meeting! And Vaggie, a former angel, so devout to Charlie and her dream, you've never seen two people more in love. Angel, although a bit eccentric and over the top, cared deeply for his friends and was ready to fight for them at a moment's notice. It was all...not what you expected, and you had a very difficult time coping with everything that you had been thrust into.

"You're shit faced," Husk snapped back. "Look, I know you're havin' a hard time with all this. But drinking away your issues ain't gonna solve any of 'em. You need to sleep this off." He watched you stumble off the bar stool, your one foot catching the other, resulting in a rather pitiful fall onto the carpet. But you couldn't feel anything, the alcohol helped mask the pain you were sure to feel tomorrow. You couldn't help but giggle at your own clumsiness. "Oh, for fuck's sake..." Husk grumbled.

Before you could even attempt to pull yourself off the ground, you saw a pair of black boots approaching you in a rather hurried manner.

"Woah!" the voice exclaimed, "Are you alright? Here, let me help you!" In no time, your limp body went from lying on the lobby floor to being hoisted up and helped back onto the bar stool you fell from. You turned your head to see Lucifer's concerned face staring back at you. "Husk, what happened?"

"She's drunk," the cat demon explained, "I told her she was done drinkin' for the night and she ate shit trying to stand up. I was about to help her back to her room-"

All of a sudden, a shadowy presence started to form behind the bar. A static filled laugh was heard before Alastor had popped up, startling the bar tender. "Husker, my good man!," the radio demon bellowed, "it seems as though I am in need of your assistance."

"Fuck! Why can't you just walk in here like a normal fucking person?" Husk grumbled.

Alastor only responded with a light chuckle before fixing his attention on you. "My, my, what have we here?" Alastor taunted. You could have sworn you heard a low growl coming from Lucifer beside you. "I say, my dear, I've never seen you look worse than you do now. What a pity, all of those teachings really didn't help you in the long run, now did they?"

You felt tears threatening to fall from your eyes at Alastor's cruel words. If you were sober, you would have run the other direction as fast as you could. Alastor had been the other real soul you met who you knew with every fiber of your being belonged in this pit. But considering you had no inhibitions and clearly no chance of getting away, you picked your head up and slammed your fists on the table in righteous anger.

"Ohhh, eat shit youuuu *hic* smiling prick!" You tried to stand up once more, only for your legs to buckle underneath you. Luckily, Lucifer had caught you before your face had met with the carpet again. "I-I don't deserve this! 'Least I'm TRYING to redeem m'self!"

Alastor's malicious grin never faltered. "Oh, and what a fabulous job you're doing! I do wonder how a woman such as yourself has fallen so far from grace."

"Fuck off, radio freak," Lucifer snarled, barring his teeth and his eyes shifting to a deep crimson red and yellow.

“Oh, ho ho! Seems as though I’ve struck a nerve,” Alastor mocked. He made his way around the bar, now towering over you and the fallen angel. “Tell me, your highness, what is your fascination with this lost soul, hmm? I’m so utterly curious as to why you would give her the time of day when all she does is wallow in her self pity and-”

“I. SAID. FUCK. OFF.” the king spat, his eyes now changing into a solid red and his voice deepening to match his threat. Though your vision was hazy, you noticed his horns had bursted out from his temples. Whether it was the alcohol or something else entirely, your face suddenly felt very, very hot. “Don’t make me repeat myself again.”

Despite the immense danger, Alastor could only muster a sly grin. “It’s very rude to ignore my question.”

“I don’t have to do anything for you! Or have you forgotten who you’re talking to?” The way Lucifer spoke sent a shiver down your spine. “The only reason that you’re not a mangled corpse on the ground right now is because of my daughter. So if you want to stay in one piece, I’d walk away right now if I were you…”

The two mens’ faces were just inches away from each other now. Alastor’s eye twitched as he glared back at Lucifer with pure distain. His eyes shifted to you only for a brief moment before standing up straight and smirking to himself.

“I suppose it really is no business of mine as to how you choose to mingle with the guests here,” the radio demon resolved. He turned around to walk away, but not before glancing at you once more over his shoulder. “They’re lost causes anyway. Come along, Husker!”

Lucifer’s demonic traits disappeared as Alastor finally left the parlor. “I hate that man.” He looked at Husk empathetically. “If I could break your arrangement with him, I would. I’m sorry. But don’t worry, I’ll take care of her.” With that, Husk nodded and followed the radio demon down the hall, leaving you and Lucifer alone at the now empty bar.

[kingdomoftyto]

I'm crying laughing, the DVDs are even worse than I remember... Season 1's menus are silent with a single static jpg of the same key character art they use for everything else, and the episodes on the Season 2 discs don't even match what's listed on the box! Absolutely stunning lack of shits given. Truly unparalleled. But I really shouldn't be surprised given... well... everything about how this series has been treated since the very beginning.

Time for a quick ~✨PHANDOM HISTORY LESSON✨~ to give newer/less hyperfixated folks more context for why the graphic novel being as great as it is is such a HUGE deal:

Danny Phantom was one of Nickelodeon's MAIN cartoons, in its time. It was a central pillar. One of the top three or four of their lineup, which is saying something when the competition includes the cultural juggernaut that is Spongebob.

Despite this, and despite its superhero theming making it perfectly marketable, it got basically ZERO official merch.

What little we did get was often ugly and very, very cheap. The dedication at the start of the graphic novel that jokes about collecting the Burger King toys? That's because it was some of the most notable merch the franchise EVER had. (I sadly do not have any of it. There was no BK in my hometown. Here's a pic from the internet, though, to give you an idea.)

If you think I'm exaggerating about that being the most significant physical merch to come out of the series, consider that the first video game had an entire menu option specifically for the Burger King promotional tie-in:

That video game, by the way, was one of only two ever based on the show. The first was an adaptation of "The Ultimate Enemy" in the style of a short sidescrolling beat-em-up, and the second was themed around "Urban Jungle" and (as far as I can tell--I've only played the first couple levels) was an arcade-style scrolling shooter. Both were for the Gameboy Advance, and both are...... fine, as far as cash-grabby video game tie-ins to kids' shows go. This was pretty normal for the time, so I suppose we did okay in that department, actually. They're not GOOD, but they're playable and have at least a bit of effort put into them.

But besides those two video games (plus a handful of simple, long-defunct Flash games on nick.com)? In the decade and a half since the show ended?

Nothing.

No books, no games, no comics, no web shorts--unless you count mega-crossovers with every other Nicktoon (a la Nicktoons Unite), or soulless promotional material like "Fairly Odd Phantom" (which, trust me, despite being the first new DP animation in over 10 years was not even worth the effort of watching).

...I think there was a limited edition FunkoPop once?

So yeah.

A Glitch in Time is not just the first cool, well-made thing we've seen from the franchise in a while. It's the first THING we've seen since the show. PERIOD. And arguably the first worthwhile supplementary material to EVER come out of the show, depending on how you feel about those GBA games and the Nicktoons crossovers.

This franchise is widely beloved even now, almost 20 years after it first aired, and it feels like that fact is now, finally, FINALLY getting some official recognition.

PLEASE read A Glitch in Time. Tell other people about it. The series--no, the fans--deserve this (and more of this, if the folks in charge see enough of a response and decide to grace us with any followup). It's LONG overdue, but better late than never.

[r3starttt]

ABBY X STRONG! R

Read this or DNI | req

Abby x strong!r who wouldn't notice you at the gym until one day after finishing her workout session of the day, she took her headphones off and shitfed her eyes upwards, making eye contact with you for a minimum second you didn't even notice, but she did and couldn't take you off her head.

Abby x strong!r who believed it was pure admiration, your muscles, the way there were perfect for someone like you, the way they flexed so perfectly that second she looked at them by mistake. You were everything she adored, everything she was looking forward at the moment, and besides that you were fucking gorgeous? literally her dream, what she thought she desired to be so much.

Abby x strong!r who unconsciously noticed you everyday after that because luckily you two had the same routine, not only talking about time but also about workout sessions. Which meant she would catch herself looking for you at the gym everyday as if you were friends, or looking at you trough the corner of her eye whenever you were close.

Abby x strong!r who hates small talk but that's how she first approached to you because it was impossible not to pay attention to you, and you noticed after a whole week of looks abby thought were discreet.

"Hi uhm... you using this?" your hands tapped her shoulder before saying anything, making sure you've got her proper attention to avoid any awkward attitude as you've experienced before at the gym. People ignoring you or pretending they didn't hear you, today you just weren't in the mood to take people and it's shit.

The blonde woman in front of you turned around, not before tossing the dumbbells beside her, on the floor. Her strong hands moved one side of the pair of headphones she was wearing, staring at you with her eyebrows slightly furrowed and covered in sweat. She smiled and cleared her throat "Sorry, couldn't hear you properly" you smiled back, maybe you were in the mood, just not with other people "sure, you can take 'em"

You kneeled to take the pair of smaller dumbbells she had on the sides of the bench she was currently sitting at, doing some weight lifting before you interrupted her. Disposed to leave you stood up with both dumbbells in hand, proud for nos struggling so much, but she stopped you "uhh sorry but, I think I've seen you before?"

Abby x strong!r who kept talking with you for the rest of your workout session, apologizing once you finished but still inviting you out someday, just as friends, or mates(? Gymbros type shit

Abby x strong!r who convinced you to workout together.

Abby x strong!r who after two weeks of talking nonstop with you, going to the gym together and even out if you two had time after the gym, realized she might not only admire you.

Abby x strong!r who once she realized was completely enamored with you

Abby x strong!r who had to make out with you after both were done with your routines. Eating you out in the showers and keeping you quiet

Abby x strong!r who couldn't ignore your muscles after that because how the fuck did she just eat all that

Abby x strong!r who begs you to wear the tightest clothes all the time because ur so yummy :)

Abby x strong!r who loves holding your thighs apart, who loves when you tug at her braid, who loves to tease your toned arms and legs with her fingers, who loves when you praise her muscles because she can praise yours back in the most dramatic way ever.

[mustainegf]

Can you write a fluff/smut for Kill ‘Em All era James? Maybe like they’re dating and it’s their first time doing it together kinda thing idk just a thought, no pressure! :) (Jamesxfem reader)

My favourite James era 😋😋

I could sense where this was leading, James held me close as he hovered over me, his lips fighting mine.

Iloved it when we kissed like that, passionate and intense. It made me forget that we had to be quiet, his band members might hear if we were too loud.

The walls here were almost paper thin.

Both of us were nervous out of our minds to have sex for the first time, but we had talked about it, and we understood how much we both wanted.

We'd been together for months now and we were both still virgins, but we were ready.

We'd seen eachother completely naked many times in the past, it's just that somehow we had never actually fucked.

That changed tonight. We both knew what would happen once we started, neither one of us would last long.

"Jamie..." I whined softly, his labored breathing humming in my ears.

He didn't say anything, just kept kissing me, his hand on my breast, squeezing it gently while teasing my nipple with his thumb. "Ohh," I gasped, arching my back, pushing against him.

I wanted more. I needed more. I always did with him. He was everything. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on. "Are you ready?" James asked, sitting up. Both of us were only in our underwear at this point.

I smiled slowly at him and bit my lip. "Yes."

My voice came out breathy and full of need. I stared at him, watching him push down his boxer briefs and kick them off. I swallowed, my body shivering from nerves. Sure I was scared, but James was the only man I'd ever want to take my virginity.

His dick stood proud in attention, I had to admit, it was perfect.

Big enough to stretch, darkish pink tip, and a thick vein that ran on the underside. I could hardly wait to have it inside of me.

The only reason why I took so long was because I couldn't stop looking at him. When I realized that he was waiting for something from me, I hurriedly removed my own panties and kicked them off.

He reached for me then, his hands landing on my hips. "You are absolutely gorgeous," he whispered, kissing my neck. "And the prettiest girl I've ever met." "You don't have to say that," I said nervously.

"I mean it," James muttered, reaching down to set a kiss on my clit.

I shuddered, my eyes closing as he sucked it into his mouth, but only for a second. "Fuck," he growled, standing back up and reaching behind himself for a condom. He ripped the foil package open and rolled it on awkwardly. I giggled at him as he finally got the condom on.

He narrowed his eyes at me. "Don't laugh," he warned with a chuckle. I nodded, trying not to make fun of him.

I wanted this to be perfect. Well, as perfect as it could get, considering we had to be quiet. After all, he wasn't exactly experienced either. "I love you," he murmured, placing a kiss on my forehead.

I looked up at him with a big smile. "I love you too." James watched me. "Do you trust me?" he asked, a nervous look in his eyes. I nodded, my heart racing. I trusted him with everything. "Honey," he groaned, reaching for my leg.

"Bring your leg up." I lifted it, resting my ankle on his shoulder. He grinned. "Just like that." We made awkward eye contact for a moment before James exhaled, "Okay, you ready?" He asked gently. I nodded hastily, begging to feel him in me. He slowly pushed himself inside me, pushing through the initial stinging discomfort, making me wince.

He stopped immediately, resting his forehead on mine. "Shit, I'm sorry. You okay?" I nodded quickly.

"It hurts a bit," I whispered, unsure whether I should tell him or not because I really did want this. "Yeah, I know, should I pull out?"

I shook my head. "No, please don't." I whispered.

"If you change your mind, let me know, but I'll go slow. Okay?"

"Okay," I breathed, needing him more than anything else in the world.

James very slowly rocked his hips back, every single sensation running through the both of us.

I bit my lip to keep from moaning. He felt so good inside me. It was painful, but it was the best pain I'd ever experienced. I felt him pause again, waiting for me to tell him if it hurt.

I shook my head. "It's fine," I whispered. He gave me a tight smile. "I'm glad. I just didn't want to hurt you." I nodded, throwing my arms around his neck and holding on. "It's okay, Jamie, it's getting better," I forced out, trying not to whine too loud.

"You feel really good by the way." James chuckled awkwardly, his eyes almost puppy-like.

His transparency made me laugh, giggling softly.

"You can move now, Jamie," I begged him breathlessly.

He nodded, bringing the pace back.

I couldn't really believe it, I was actually having sex, and with James. It was perfectThe idea was still so new and fresh. It felt amazing though. I was having the time of my life. After all, it was my first time.

The pain was subsiding, which was now taken over by complete lust and pleasure. He felt perfect inside of me, I could hardly describe the sensation.

"Fuck, that's good..." I groaned, throwing my head back on James' pillow.

"You're so tight.." James' voice was exhausted, but his thrusts were full of life.

I bit my lip, trying to stay quiet, but failing miserably. I was making little whimpers and whines, unable to contain myself. My body started heating up, wanting to explode.

I clutched onto his shoulders, watching his face contort with indescribable pleasure. "You can go faster James." I whispered.

James grinning maliciously, quickening his hips which made me flinch and twitch underneath him.

"Jamie-oh James, come here..." I mumbled, reaching my arms around his neck to pull him down to me. I just wanted to be close, especially in such an intimate moment.

I never thought I would experience such intense intimacy with someone. But here I was, with James. And it was wonderful.

I could easily get used to this. In fact, I already had.

With every passing second, I wanted nothing more than to have every night be like this.

"I love you, baby," James whimpered into my ear, his body shaking with every thrust.

I felt it too. I loved him. I did. And the way he was looking at me, it was clear he was feeling it too.

This was what love felt like. I knew in that moment that I was going to love him forever, no matter what he did. "I- I love you too." I moaned softly into the dark bedroom.

It only took another thrust or two before James was panicking. "Fuck, fuck, I'm gonna cum"" he uttered.

His eyes opened wide, staring down at me with an expression of desire. I smiled, gripping his hair tighter. "That's good. Come inside me, Jamie..." I breathed, thankful he had a condom on.

I reached down to rub my clit, my orgasm following behind his.

James' Body convulsed, trembling violently as he toppled onto me, filling the condom. It wasn't long after that I was spasming around his dick.

We held each other for a few moments, our hearts racing wildly. We were both moaning messes, falling down from our highs. "That was perfect..." James chuckled under his breath, kissing my cheek.

I ran my fingers through his long wispy hair, still catching my breath. "Perfect," I smiled.

James nudged himself up, gazing over at me. My cheeks went pink, running my fingertips over his light acne scars, one of my favorite parts about him. He was just so cute.

[recklessfiction]

Keep an Eye Out As You Travel West

You see a church, you just keep on walking. Most are abandoned anyhow, nothing left in 'em but the hollowed out husks of their priests. The rest have been filled by now; old pretenders, zealots, and self proclaimed prophets snatching up any man fool enough to worship. And that's if you're lucky. There are older things, other things that have curled up amidst the altars of the Lord like worms in dirt. If you're wanting to do any worshiping, best do it out under the sky.

There're things that roam the dust, figures of men with eyes deader than any corpse and smiles as bright and pretty as a lady's. They come around sometimes, always trying to pawn off some bizarre thing; elaborate crowns made of rusted nails, gold lockets with strange portraits inside, letters that can't be read without getting a deep pounding in your head, and keys rusted with so much blood it'd be a wonder if they turned anything at all. Now, I've seen what comes for folks who trade with them and I'll tell you this. Wherever they got their goods, it sure as shit wasn't from here.

You'll be hearing now about the "Oil Baptisms," I'm sure. Black sea water dredged up from some abyss, thicker than any water I've ever seen and you can smell it long a mile away. They say it gives people "the sight" but of what I can't say. All I know is that once you start smelling that briny shit on the wind, the screaming don't start long after.

Be careful what deals you make out here. There're plenty of strange folk who would be more than glad to work you down to the bone and long after, too. Work is work, crops need harvesting, graves need digging, meat needs carving, and idols need worshiping. Watch your words and read your contracts, else you might just be stuck washing the feet of the righteous until doomsday.

Best stay indoors once night comes, that's when a lot of the "families" start movin' out. They take to the roads, long lines of them, a parade of the ugliest sons of bitches you've ever seen. In the daylight, their skin never fits quite right and stinks to high heaven but once the sun dips past the trees, they start taking it off. They move from place to place, sloughing off their decayed flesh and stealing new off any traveler they come across. Lock your doors and put out your lights before they coming knocking on your door, asking sweetly, "Do you have anything I could wear?"

I am of the opinion that the woods ought not be traversed by folk who ain't been called there. Keep to the roads and towns, there's enough foul mess there if it's strangeness you're looking for. But what's in the woods has always been in the woods and if you pass the treeline with no business being there, well. The woods will give you business.

While a useful tool, a gun won't save you from drowning in the bathtub of a family of fanatic prognosticators, or from having your skin torn clean off by the night sky. Keep your ears up for any kind of protection you can get and learn to speak well because a lot of smart talk can get you out of a whole mess of trouble.

Keep on moving, friend. If you're looking to survive this trek, don't stop for anything, not even to bury the dead or feed the starving. It ain't worth what'll catch you, cause there's always things waiting for a fella to slow down so's they can get their claws in faster, deeper. You wanna be stuck here, in the fields and the dirt, under the big sky while hymns are burned into your skull? No?

Then keep on moving.

[faunandfloraas]

Aussie question time: when I find out an idol is American/Canadian, their image in my mind completely changes because now it’s like “Oh I know exactly who you are, I grew up with your type around me” there are subtleties that I’m going to understand that others might not. So with all that said, I’ve been curious about what that’s like (if you experience it) w the skz aussies (throw in a lily if you’re feeling it -v-) 🎤

this is wayyyyyy too long so I'm putting it under a read more- also disclaimer: i dont know these guys and these are just my opinions, dont take em too srs <3

Hmmmm... Well I guess I'll start with Felix- I've said it before a bunch but the whole "Felix is a tiny uwuw baby sweet summerchild who is just such a baby" etc. etc. has made me laugh from the get go- because Yep! he is incredibly sensitive and sweet natured and kind and he cries a lot- 100% that is true. Dont think I'm saying it's not. But like. He also grew up in western sydney, he grew up in a area that if you google it one of the first suggestions is "is it safe" but then at the same time he went to private catholic school im pretty sure. and i saw pics from back then that he'd posted back in the day of cool little felix with his gold watch and his fade and all his little homeboys looking rowdy on the train- I know that kid and while that kid can also be sweet and sensitive, he's not incapable and hes not a baby. Good recent example was when he went on that Jewel box show with the gay dudes and people were acting like he was *so uncomfortable* and sooooo out of his element and so this and so that- theres gay dudes all over sydney, there's gay dudes all over australian media- the idea felix couldnt handle that was simply laughable to me- but it kinda shows how many outside perceptions of him still very much fall into that vaguely infantalizing thing. Like when he was the one who was happy to go up to adam levine and dj snake in that skz talker while the other boys were much more shy? that didnt shock me at all. felix went to korea as a whole teenager laregly against his parent wishes- he's actually quite an outgoing and brave guy. Outgoing guys can still be sweeties, though- one doesn't negate the other.

One other aspect of Felix i think a lot of fans just gloss over but is easily noticeable by me is that he can kindaaaaaa be ... a lil bitchy? like he's never ever mean or cruel dont get me wrong- but he has a slight bitchy streak, he rolls his eyes AND he's actually much more sarcastic than people bring up? Again- he does it a lot with Chan and that doesnt shock me- they both are aussie boys, Chan will get it and I think Felix can very much be himself with Chan, he doesn't necessarily feel the need to put up an extra air of like... Sweetie boy-ness? bc when he calls chan a cunt on live chan just laughs and goes OI!! so yuh the main thing with felix is while i do think hes a little sweet guy, ive never from the get go had a hard time seeing him outside of that box, too. Also maybe that's a lil bit aussie humour slipping under the radar here or there 🤔

Chan to me from the get go too was pretty much like. Prototypical overachieving aussie Good Boy. Like, i had a drafted post i never posted bc it was too niche- but it was essentially about how he speaks about sports and the like, and it just said "We get it. You went to zone carnival" which was the sporting event that the kids who got gold or 1st place were sent to. If you went to zone, you were the Successful kid. I think these days most fans perceive him as... a bit of a goofy guy? but I have gone through the archives and i have seen the comments from people talking about how chans such a bad boy- thats shit is so funny to me bc you can show me every iteration of chan and I'd never, ever think he's a bad boy. Like he wishes he was a bad boy, he kinda cosplays a bad boy- even him referencing swearing bc of his australianess and shit over the years makes me giggle a little bc i feel like felix def 100% swears all the time but he doesnt like Smirk about it too much? he doesnt really bring it up? things like that stand out, it to me feels very like Oh yeah I'm this naughty Aussie boy who swears hehe and then all the australians are like ? Girl we all do huh lmao

Otherwise, I dont have as much to say about chan as i do about felix, funnily. Like idk people might perceive differently to me, but nothing too far off? I will say that given Chan's success and the fact he was seemingly a very well achieving kid too (maybe not debuting for such a long time is part of this) he is WAY more humble than I'd expect. Like not to besmirch Australian men but a lot of them can be really loud and cocky, especially the famous successful ones (any sport star) it's almost encouraged to be like that if you're a dude (but only to a certain degree, anything beyond a certain point and you'll be roasted lol) So I have to give credit where it's due and say that Chan *Seemingly does have a very good nature and I appreciate that about him! Its probably why I like him so much bc he actually very much doesn't give off those vibes- he doesn't seem like that overly macho cocky bloke I know very well. So that makes him good fun for me- he's very successful and he's confident and yet he doesn't activate any of my bitch instincts- thats impressive! I don't know him, so I'll never know for sure of course, i feel like i need to make that disclaimer but still I do believe he has a good heart, and he tries so hard! and I appreciate that.

Lily is weirdly like Chan. like she's hilariously like chan tbh- I wonder how they really get along sometimes bc I feel like they might look at each other and be like Hm... we the same............ ? Lmao I will say though, lily is a bit out of pocket and half of that I believe is her personality but half of it is just.... I think she's just australian 😭 like i cant lie you get me as a teenager to early 20 something and put me on a live and I can promise I would be saying as much ?? shit. Like, I do think Australians are a little loud and not necessarily always.... tactful (again Not everyone, but yk.) lily certainly fits that bill to a T. I appreciate that regardless of her idolhood she does still say things that maybe she shouldn't, she shrugs off a shoplifting confession, she says she'd murder someone if she had to, she bought and wore a shirt that fans quickly tracked down and found out all the proceeds were going to Palestine- she would have known what that suggested. she clearly had this goal of being an idol since she was a baby, like literal baby but she hasn't sacrificed her broader personality, even the parts that could potentially be off-putting to those idol fans that expect perfection and nothing else. I appreciate that in her! and I hope she never loses her little weird girl spark bc it does make her very dynamic! Her slightly gruff aussie girlness is very fun for me to see in the idolsphere bc it def feels out of place, but in a refreshing way...

so yeah. Idk if this was sensical, I was making dinner so I put my phone down a bunch and it's probably disjointed but thats my opinion... my thoughts, my ideas! Idk my take on them. Thanks for asking 🫡

[eggcats]

I got hit with motivation for a super quick, like 500 word one shot from my Housewife Vox au, so here it is. (I wrote this in like 20 minutes on my phone, so try to ignore any, like, glaring errors).

(I'm thinking maybe he's talking to Velvette, but I wasn't sure enough to name anyone so it's just someone close-ish to Vox, owned/employed by him, talking to him, here).

--

“I don't know how you can handle being in charge of all these souls when you're not even the boss in your own relationship.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I'm just saying, you're not even in charge of yourself and you expect to be in charge of ME too?”

“I don't know what you think about mine and Alastor's relationship, but if anyone's in charge of it, it's me.”

“Yeah, right. He kills anyone who even looks TWICE at you!”

“And I let him.”

“Sure…..”

“I can get Alastor to do whatever I want.”

-cut to Vox, in a 1950s housewife dress, making the world's most disgusting platter of jello with spam and mayonnaise-

“He'll eat this if I tell him to.”

“Vox, no one would even touch that, not even if you paid ‘em to.”

“He will. Watch this.”

Alastor doesn't know what he expected when he entered the kitchen, having been alerted to Vox desiring his presence by his shadow, but this. Was not it. His darling being dressed up was not too out of the ordinary, although typically he avoided others seeing him in such outfits. (Despite now having the power to eliminate anyone who would dare even think of mockery, some habits from being alive are hard to break.)

But when Alastor approaches his picture box, he's stopped when he notices the most atrocious imitation of food he's ever seen. Ears flattening, eyes narrowing, and a sharp increase in the radio static is all he can do for a few seconds as he attempts to process just what exactly he is looking at.

His Vox is not the most accomplished chef, even now, but Alastor KNOWS he has instilled some sense into him after 50 years together, and THAT….item….was certainly not something he had ever taught him.

“What in heavens name is THAT?!”

“Dinner!”

“It most certainly is NOT.”

“Don't you remember when I made this for you, back when we first met? I think it was one of the first things I ever made for you.”

“I remember I immediately tossed it into the trash, darling.”

“Well….I thought maybe you could actually try it, now? I worked really hard on it.”

“Cher, certainly there are other things you could test your culinary skills on, as opposed to….whatever that is.”

“If you're sure…I just thought it'd be a nice memory, like an anniversary or something, to show how much we've loved each other throughout the years. But I can do something else, I guess….”

Eyes widening, a light bulb shatters as Alastor grabs the food quicker than even Vox can track, and eats the entire thing before he can even react to it.

“Oh! You must have really liked it, huh?”

“I can honestly say I've never tasted anything like it before, dearest.”

“Awesome! So you're on board with the whole anniversary, thing?”

“That's a…lovely idea, mon cher. How…how often were you considering this…anniversary?”

“Oh, at least twice a month! I have a lot of jello recipes I've never been able to fully try out that I remember from when I was alive! And all of them will be just as delicious as the one I made today!”

“....Excellent.”

–

“Holy shit, Vox, I can't believe he actually ate it!”

“I told you.”

“How long before you tell him you made up the whole anniversary thing?”

“Immediately after our next one in two weeks.”

“That's diabolical.”

“Yeah, whatever. Don't ever question me again or I'll tell him to kill you next.”

“Got it, damn. Touchy.”

[grigori77]

Reasons to LOVE Dungeons & Dragons: Honour Among Thieves

It's brand new in cinemas, so there are still plenty who ain't seen it, so if you're among 'em best skip this and just GO SEE IT, it's SO well worth it, genuinely it's one of the best new movies I've seen so far this year. Hope you love it as much as I did!

So, yeah, there you go - SPOILER WARNING, FOLKS!!! If you don't wanna get spoiled, RUN!!!

Still here? Okay, here we go then ...

This really is, UNAPOLOGETICALLY, a comedy. I mean yeah, this is a classic fantasy action adventure in the Willow, Krull or Ladyhawke mold, but it is also very enthusiastically POKING FUN at the classic conventions of the genre ... albeit CLEARLY done with great affection and love for the material, as only the best lampoons can be. So this is more The Princess Bride or Galaxy Quest than Your Highness or Spaceballs ...

Chris Pine is ALWAYS at his best when he's being FUNNY, so he is PERFECT here. Edgin is most definitely a bit of a douchebag, but he's the sweetest, most lovable douchebag you'll ever encounter.

Holga. Literally just EVERYTHING about Holga. She's my favourite character in this, this REALLY IS the best role that Michelle Rodriguez has EVER HAD, if you ask me. She's a total badass, a truly AMAZING FIGHTER, but I love that despite her dour demeanour she's actually quite sweet, gentle and really a great innocent in many ways. She's an absolute cinammon roll and must be protected at all costs.

OH MY GODS!!! All the easter eggs, SO MANY easter eggs ... FAR too many to count throughout, all the references and nods and winks to the game itself, all the spells and races and creatures and stuff ... but I love how the movie NEVER beats you over the head pointing any of it out, it just lets you enjoy it. So the proper fans will get a huge kick out of spotting it all, but casual viewers will just enjoy it as rich worldbuilding colour and flavour.

Seriously though, it's a D&D fan's DREAM!!! Not just the mimic, or the owlbear, or the gelatinous cube! SO MUCH to spot ...

Justice Smith's Simon gets THE CLEVEREST and best introduction in the film, I love the theatre scene, he's SO BAD at this while also simulataneously being really great. Totally sums up this gloriously clunky hot mess of a sorcerer ...

the opening is GENIUS, totally sets the movie up as it means to go on - the parole hearing is a brilliant comedic take on the scene-setting infodump which is brilliantly carried through in the way the movie delivers exposition in a fun way or just lets you absorb it through what's happening in each scene. This is the perfect, TEXTBOOK way to do it.

"That is one pudgy dragon!" LOL

Doric. Just EVERYTHING about Doric. Sophia Lillis' tiefling druid is a wonderful diminutive little action hero, so fiesty and capable. I love her. It's just a shame she's not primary coloured, I'd have loved it even more if she'd been blue, or red ...

The Wildshape Escape! XD Yeah, I love that, that's THE BEST set-piece in the whole movie, definitely, when Doric gets cught out spying and has to shapeshift on the fly to get away, and it all plays out in one immersive single shot that just leaves your heart in your mouth ...

Oh, the Speak With The Dead montage, that is comedy GOLD. Funniest scene in the whole movie. And with added payoff at the end! XD

Rege-Jean Page's Xenk Yendar. Oh boy, that paladin is something else. I love how LITERAL he is, he's like Drax in GOTG but much more intelligent. Y'know when Holga says: "You're not a lot of fun, are you?" to him? She's so wrong. I just wish there was more of him in this ...

The heist! Oh, the heist! So good ... the portal trick, it's great, love the way they did that, and then that HILARIOUS bard illusion distraction - Pine skipping the song like a broken record was just chef's kiss!

That wonderful wibbly-wobbly illusory reality thing whenever Simon tries to atune to the Helm ... wow, that is some spectacularly trippy shit. Granted, twice is fine for terms of pacing, but I could've done with a few more scenes of that, it's fascinating.

Hugh Grant really has just become a MASTER at playing smarmy, slimy duplicitous gits now, hasn't he? Forge is a reprehensible prick and I love it.

I love how they made Bradley Cooper a halfling for his cameo. They're never gonna let him live down the fact that he's now probably best known for playing a two-foot-tall talking racoon so forever after he will be a Short King.

Wow, Daisy Head's Sofina is a CRACKING villain, she's just SO CREEPY!!! I love how coolly menacing she is, a brilliant dark necromantic wizard that just makes your skin crawl. Especially at the end ... IS SHE a lich? Is that what they were doing there?

That whole big action climax, the showdown in the city centre is FIRE!!! It's so amazing, so brilliantly dynamic, with EVEN MORE great easter eggs! Simon and Sofina having an insanely awesome "arm wrestling" bout with Mage Hand versus Earthen Grasp (I think that's the spell, couldn't be sure), oh my gods! So cool ... and then the way they neutralised the threat! Brilliant.

Chloe Coleman's Kira is an absolutely adorable delight, and I think she's ENTIRELY JUSTIFIED in how pissed she is at Edgin for abandoning her. It makes the payoff when they finally make up so much better.

And that resurrection scene at the end? Yeah, sure, I saw that coming a mile off, but it was so well done, and they played it so well, that it was still SUCH a powerful scene even so. Just perfect.

Seriously, they just did this whole thing SO PERFECTLY. It's visually STUNNING, really it just looks AMAZING, and the action sequences are BRILLIANT but always feel entirely necessary for the story, which is how you want to do it. Best of all, though, is THE PACING!!! This is such a quick, breezy film, it just barrels along at a spectacular clip, so it never drags. Mark Kermode is right, even though this is two and a quarter hours long it doesn't FEEL LIKE IT, it feels like a super-trim 90-minute movie.

And it ties everything off nice and neat, too. Sure, there are definitely possibilities for the future, going forward if they make more, but if the movie DOES tank then it's fine, because this really does do a great job about feeling self-contained and telling its own complete story, so if we DON'T get more it won't be too big a disappointment ...

[raindrop-21]

Scarred Love: Chapter Two: Need To Know

A/n: Here's chapter two! chapter three will be posted anytime this week as it's not the weekend anymore and I have school, so please keep that in mind! I've also given reader's friend a name: Eve!

word count: 1,114

Cw: somewhat insecure reader, Ghoap x f!reader, soulmates, talk about scars

Ch1, Ch2, Ch3, Ch4, Ch5, Ch6, Ch7~ Masterlist

“Yes! Yes! Go! Go talk to them!” She says excitedly.

“What would I even say to them?” You reply, your voice a mixture of caution and want.

Your friend clasps your hands and looks at you with the most serious expression you’ve ever seen on her face. She looks at you with the determination you wish you could have. Her determination is somewhat giving you some determination of your own.

“Girl, I’ve known you for so long now. You’ve never liked the idea of having a soulmate, but the look in your eyes when you look at them is something I’ve never seen from you before. You’re looking at them with want and need. Go talk to them.” Eve says with the most loving and understanding look in her eyes.

You advert your eyes from her gaze in self-doubt. “But what if they think I’m just screwing with them…I’ve never heard of a person having two soulmates so I doubt they have either…”

Eve scoffs and rolls her eyes. “Dear, I don’t think they’d think that. I think they might find it strange that they have another soulmate and didn’t know about it. If you really think they’d doubt you with only being able to see the scars on your face, then take off your jacket. They’ll recognize the scars as their own. Recognize you as their own.”

You know she’s right, but you still can’t help but feel insecure.

“But still…They already have each other…What they decide that they don’t need or want me?” You sigh weakly.

Eve sighs disapointedly. “Sweetheart, if they decide that they don’t want you even though you might be their soulmate. Just know, I’ll personally beat their asses no matter how much bigger or stronger they are than me.”

She pulls you into a deep, strong hug. One that always grounds you and calms your nerves. You hug her back, knowing that she means it, even if it’s unlikely that she’d actually physically fight them. You take a deep breath, thank her, and walk towards the group of men. Once you’re within a couple of feet of the men you make yourself known.

“Uhm… Hello?” You say in a semi-quiet but confident voice.

One of the men, one with a blue cap with a British flag on it turns around at the sound of your voice. He looks you up and down and then smiles and holds out his hand.

“Hey there little lass, name’s Kyle.” He says sweetly with a toothy smile.

“Hi… Uhm, I kind of wanted to speak to your friends over there.” You say with a hand gesture to the two whom you think are your soulmates. A tall blonde man with a black surgical mask on, and a brunette man with a short mohawk who’s a tad bit shorter than the blonde man.

“Oh? You want to speak with Johnny and Simon? If you’re looking for a fun night, sorry but they’ve already found their soulmate; each other.” He says gently as if trying not to let you down.

“No, no, you don’t understand; I think I’m also their soulmate.” You say as you remove your jacket showing Kyle the scars that decorate your arms.

He takes a look at your arms and his expression turns to one of shock and his mouth makes a perfect little ‘o’ shape.

“Oh….Oh! Holy shit!” He immediately recognizes the scars as the ones he’s seen on Johnny and Simon’s arms a million times. “Simon! Johnny! Come here for a second!”

Johnny and Simon walk over to where you and Kyle are standing. Even though you’ve made up your mind to speak to them, you can’t help but want to walk away and forget for fear of rejection.

“What do y’need Garrick?” The blonde says in a gruff voice as if he’s annoyed to be called away from what he was doing.

“Simon, don’t be like that, Kyle’s got a bonnie girl with ‘em. Maybe he wants to introduce us to his Lassie.” The brunette jokes, which earns a scoff from Simon.

Your hands tremble a bit, and you clasp them behind your back nervously as you try to find the right words to speak. What if they laugh at me? What if they think I’m playing some sick prank? Any and every situation of what could go wrong played through your head, but you still went through with it.

“Actually, I’m here for you guys…” You say nervously as you look at the two men in front of you. The lights behind them have been somewhat engulfed by Simon’s large frame, so they can’t exactly see the scars on your face that match theirs.

“What do you mean ‘here for us’, Lass?” Johnny asks curiously with a raised eyebrow. Simon gives you an equally curious look.

“I-I believe I may be your soulmate.” You do this with all the confidence and courage you can muster. Your response to his question makes both Johnny and Simon laugh, not at you, but at the idea of having another soulmate.

“Lassie, I don’t think that's right. You can’t have two soulmates.” Johnny says with a light chuckle still present in his voice.

You sigh, a tad disappointed and upset. Disappointed because, even though you didn’t expect them to believe you they didn’t. And upset because you think they’re laughing at you.

“Look…I know it’s absurd. It sounds insane even to me.” You think for a moment on the way to ‘prove’ it to them and you settle for removing your jacket. You remove your jacket, but then you realize that Simon is blocking the light. “Hey, uh, could you move over a bit, you’re blocking the light.”

“Oh, sorry.” Simon huffs before moving over and letting the light shine onto you.

Once the light shines on you, the scars on your face, neck, arms, and shoulders are visible to your eyes. Their eyes trail from each little scar, a trail they’ve followed on each other’s bodies a million times.

“Holy shit…” They mumble in unison. 

“I-I….” At this point, all the words you wanted to say have left you. You’re left waiting for whatever the two men in front of you are going to do next.

Simon and Johnny look at each other, and then back at you, and then back at each other. They give each other a nod before looking at you and reaching out their hands.

“Come with us.” Johnny says with a bit of urgency in his voice. 

You’re stuck in your own mind. Do you take their hands and follow them or do you refuse them and say you want to talk here?

Taglist: @under-the-dirt @littlebluespoon

[ar3s-r4t-qu33n]

Idfc if he's real or not, he's still worse written than Eddie. Also the problem is in his fans that are making him no guilty, innocent baby and always refering that Coyle/Eddie/Everybody else im outlast are the same. And if you think it'll work, try to compare Walker (with PTSD after war) with Franco (who is just a sicko). Anyway Barbi's simps are way more agressive than any other fans when you say something bad, what's a fact, about a grown ass man. I feel like those people are just little kids who are getting upset after school and shouldn't play the game ;) When I see all those comments with "He'S mY PoOkIE" I'm getting sick... Ya'll should get a brain

Guys look!! I got one!!

You don't deserve a response, because if you were old enough to be playing Outlast, you would be able to figure out that shaming people for (checks notes) liking a fictional character in a horror series? Is plain stupid.

It would also serve you well to maybe do some spell check before you come into my asks like this. I'd take you more seriously if you maybe drafted this one more time, but here we go:

First of all, you don't know me. You can check out my like, five posts and see that only two of em are Franco related and none of them baby him. In fact, I don't think I've seen a post yet by anyone who says "Franco is a sweet, innocent baby who did no wrong" because... That's the point. He's interesting BECAUSE he's done shit wrong. We are playing Outlast. Everyone is complex and awful and interesting. Just because not every post is marked with a little footnote that says "oh by the way everyone, Franco is a bad, bad man 🥺 I don't support his actions, I'm not a Franco defender, I just wanted to draw him being silly 🥺" doesn't mean we're all out here claiming he's a saint. The fact that he's a fucked up lil guy is why we like him. I feel like that's a given with all Outlast characters? But that's just me after being a fan of this franchise for years now, idk, being able to step back and analyse a community to see what they enjoy about something is quite a fun and easy task, I recommend giving it a try instead of coming into "loser nobody who has been on Tumblr for like a week's" asks to complain to me like I can put all the Franco fans in the corner until they learn to interpret characters the way you have decided is objectively correct.

But even if they are "babying" him and apparently ignoring that this is the Outlast series and Franco is a character from Outlast... Oh no! What horror! Someone is misinterpreting a VIDEO GAME CHARACTER what a terrible and unique crime!

Franco "just a sicko" Barbi was abused and neglected by his father, his mother was murdered, and he only ever received affection after he killed someone. But yeah, he was just born fucked up whereas every other Outlast character earned their trauma and the right to kill the player. What a senseless and just untrue take and I'm sure you know that, you just want to complain because that's all you people like to do. You want to feel morally superior over someone because you don't understand why they feel the way they do instead of just moving on and ignoring them like any other sensible adult would. Because who's actually getting hurt if some people think Franco is their lil Pookie? Is it you? Does it cause you psychic damage? Because last I checked, this is the internet. We are responsible for ourselves, so unless somebody is actually hurting anyone...

Block the Franco tag. You are brave enough to type out this whole message to a stranger online and act morally superior because comparing which video game character deserves the right to kill you is THE most mature thing in the world, so you're definitely brave enough to block the tag and move on.

You are responsible for what you see online, but ESPECIALLY on Tumblr, it is so so easy to hide content you don't want to see, and mind your own business. Quite frankly, I don't care if I come across as aggressive here. You came into my asks about a tag/fandom you clearly aren't in trying to act like you're better than the rest of us. That's pretty damn aggressive, wouldn't you say?

This is Outlast. A game about fucked up guys doing fucked up shit, and we love them for it. If that is too much for you, if the mommy issues gangster is too crazy for you but Eddie and Trager and Knoth and Coyle are completely fine, no questions asked? I don't think this series is for you. Sexual horror is a staple of Outlast. Childhood trauma is a staple of Outlast. You can't be shocked when people respond to a new character in a video game they like.

YOU are not better than me because you like Chris Walker and I like Franco Barbi. I can't believe you need to be told this, we are all in the same uncomfortable freakshow cesspit that is The Outlast Fandom, no one is morally good. No one is better than anyone else. You cannot claim moral superiority over any character because at the end of the day, I can point to Wernicke and say with my full chest that he is objectively the worst because he's a literal nazi, and what then? Are you going to tell me that Franco is worse than a nazi? The debate is over, in the list of "who is the worst of these awful people", Wernicke wins hands DOWN. The point is null because EVERYONE SUCKS HERE!!! THAT'S THE POINT!!!!

Is that enough for you? Or are you gonna keep harassing people through your alts or getting your friends to do it? I can go alllllll day, baby, you ain't making me feel bad about my interests in the O U T L A S T fandom, dear GOD, this is ridiculous. Don't fucking condescend me, telling me to "get a brain" you don't KNOW ME, I am a stranger to you, why do you feel comfortable coming onto my blog harassing me about a video game character? That's not a good look for you and now it is immortalised here. Anonymous or not, you still did this. Whoever you are, you typed that out and sent it to a random person you do not know and felt comfortable enough to do so.

That's weird.

[musashi]

just watched your latest youtube video (the one on the aai collection) and i want to thank you for not assuming malice from the actions of the ace attorney wiki admin who refuses to let the relation between franziska and miles be listed as "siblings". I've seen so many people see that and jump to the worst possible conclusion that "this must be because they ship miles and franziska" and not the much more reasonable conclusion that theyre just sort of anal about the nuance of their relationship and what's explicitly canon

i... that is deranged. that is the most wild conclusion to jump to that i can think of.

the aa fandom's violent allergy to actually engaging with the text is... unlike everything i have ever seen. i used to understand being unhappy with canon, wanting to rewrite/fix/add to it, all the memes about "lol i made it better" "canon will be lovingly baked at 400 degrees until it is properly browned" etc but the aa fandom has turned me into an absolute canon-worshipper with how much they just... do not care to acknowledge canon at all, and get WEIRD when you are a person who does.

i don't understand why they get so uppity at the siblings thing. there are a million different ways you can interpret whatever they have going on, but all we know is:

miles studied under manfred von karma

franziska, who also studied under him, affectionately refers to miles as her little brother.

like that's literally it... that's all we have. we don't know if miles lived with them. we don't know if miles considers franziska to be his sister. he never calls her that, and often jumps through hoops to avoid calling her that. why is that? is it that he doesn't see her that way? that he believes his fondness for her is too deep, special, and nuanced to delegate to something simple like 'sister'? is he just being emotionally constipated, a thing we know he is often? meditate on it! why do people just lie, instead? why don't people want to have fun and analyze the relationship?

i don't think it is even "anal" to run the wiki that way. a fandom wiki, like a regular wiki, is supposed to be full of strictly canon information, not conjecture and fanon. if you want conjecture, then get on ao3 or open your word process and make some. but a wiki is meant to provide documented, sourced information, and you cannot say that miles edgeworth considers franziska his sister when he patently says nothing on the matter in canon.

turning that into "its because op ships them" is the most deluded form of thinking i can imagine, and it's so transparent--they're insecure about their headcanons or mad that they were misled by fanon, do not like concrete proof that they were misled, and so they try to paint an innocent person as secretly some sort of deviant or problematic to cast that shame elsewhere. typical 15 year old catholic twitter user behaviour, you meet one you meet em all.

even if they did ship mitsumei, like... who cares, genuinely. they're lines. they're made up. but that's not what's happening here, it's literally just a wiki runner who is running a wiki correctly, and the aa fandom historically HATES canon and facts so they're losing their shit.

one of the youtube videos i have on the backburner is "aa fandom misconceptions" where i'm just going to debunk a thousand of these stupid fucking things one by one. the more time passes the more anxious i get wanting to make it. maybe it's just me being a rules-obsessed autistic, but i cannot stand when people just lie about canon.

[joelsbeard]

oh em gee i’ve literally js found ur blog and i’m in loveeeeeeee

would you be willing to give us your hcs about young!joel and readers first time?? i’m such a whore for that man<33

Hihi!! Thank you you are are so sweet 😊also thank you for the ask :) the tlou fandom for sure needs more pre-outbreak!joel content!!!! I am starved for that shit. I love hot and old ass dilf joel don't get me wrong but mannnn he was so cute when he was younger 🥲 such a lil cutie.

I've never actually thought about this because my mind always jumps to once joel and reader are in an established relationship hehe or when they're dating but not quite official yet. I'm not sure about these hc's tbh, I hope you like them!!

To start off, I don't think joel was a player in high school at ALL. Though of course, with his damn looks he could be. I might even go as far as to say I think he could sometimes give off golden retriever energy? Maybe once he gets to know you. I don't think he'd be 100% golden retriever energy lol definitely not, thats tommy haha. I imagine him only having had 1 or 2 girlfriends in high school, bc like i said i don't think he'd be a player. Flirty with multiple girls at most but I think that might be pushing it.

For some reason I feel like you would be his second girlfriend lol, with the first being eh bc you know how dating is in high school. He probably would've tried some stuff with her (😡) but still inexperienced by the time he meets you.

After some time flirting, you guys go on a couple of dates and you both really really like each other, then afterwards is when you two finally decide to take the next step 🙈

He would never pressure you to do anything you don't want, because joel miller is a gentleman!!!

Your first time would probably be at yours or his house when you were able to find time alone since he would want y'alls first time to be special

The first time you see his dick you probably panic a little and he sees the blood drain from your face because he's definitely on the more gifted side (both in girth and length ;) ), but he just pulls you in close and reassures you that it's okay if you change your mind, he doesn't want to pressure you ❤️

This is the first time y'all have ever seen each other naked and he tells you "you're so beautiful" while he kisses down your neck to your chest

Ofc he makes you cum on his fingers once or twice to make sure you're ready and comfortable, and you try to reciprocate and give him a handjob first but shortly after you start he tells you to save it for another time, otherwise he'll bust a nut before he even goes inside you because he's so horny for you LOL

You struggle a little when he first pushes inside you because he's just so big, and he tells you "take your time baby" while rubbing his thumbs across your cheeks and kissing your forehead and nose as you take more and more of him

Once he bottoms out you both sigh and you tell him to give you a minute as you adjust to him, ofc he does as you ask but you can tell he's eager to start moving inside you and he almost starts shaking with the anticipation hahahah

You have your legs wrapped around his back as well as both arms, with one hand cradling the back of his head and tangled in his soft hair as you hold his head down to yours, and he's holding himself up above you with his forearms caging your head in

Once you get used to feeling him inside you, you tell him he can start to move slowly, so he just rocks back and forth in you while y'all are making out and grinding on each other like theres no tomorrow LMAO

He lets you finish first but he comes almost right afterwards inside you, and then you guys are just laying there in your post-nut bliss✨ before he slides out of you and gets a towel to wipe you down ❤️

Then you just lay in bed together and cuddle and kiss each other as he asks you "was that okay?" and you hold his adorable face in your hands and say "it was perfect" and give him a lil kiss on the nose because he's so cute

After that, y'all be fuckin like rabbits for sure LMAO until your last days 🙏🏼 HHAHAH

I hope I did your thoughts justice hehe, i was NOT expecting to write this much lol