#this is the funniest answer

[yansurnummu]

nirnroot is cilantro???

[egophiliac]

WAIT when did he get FANGS

[funishment-time]

LMAO

happy pride

[jeonseoguu]

please… i need the duwangagang trio + the babysitter jojotaro

my dumbass realized AFTER i finished that i literally forgot koichi

COMMISSIONS ARE NOW OPEN !!! check my pinned post for more details ⭐️

[puppyeared]

good morning sifloop nation

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Me getting recommended The Dad Who Lived on Youtube yesterday: ugh, tiktok compilations are definitely not my thing but I'm out of videos so I'll put it on in the background

Me today, desperately refreshing the channel: Did Clapclop solve Evangeline's broom problem? Has the apple pie solved the Thad problem permanently, is Dad safe? OH GOD I BET HANK ATE THE PIE DIDN'T HE, SO LONG AS IT WAS HANK AND NOT CHAD IT'LL BE OKAY, WHO ATE THE PIE??

[mysterycitrus]

guys will put out any option to try and combat the idea of cass becoming batman but it’s always a good time cause the other choices are terry (exists in an elseworlds canon from the 90s), damian (the least interesting thing that could be done with his character imo), jace (this is a joke — they do not know who jace is), bruce’s arthritis riddled corpse, dick (would rather kill himself), or tim (would rather kill h

[sugarcube-stillabookworm]

the funniest bit in any marvel content is still and forever will be six minutes into the pilot of agents of shield when agent coulson hides in a dark corner waiting for ward to say he knows he's dead because he's level six just to step out in the light with "welcome to level seven". king of dramatic entrances

[akai-akai]

tf141 assisting in a drug bust, except the drugs get lit on fire and they're accidentally breathing in the fumes and getting high as fucking balls.

Johnny is MIA, chased some fucking wild animal off into the brush and he's not answering comms.

Kyle is having a crisis, nearly in tears as he yells "I promised my mum I'd never do drugs!!" at the ground as if it's the dirt's fault he's fucking baked.

Simon is sitting on the ground, head in his hands, not speaking a word and sitting so still he could be mistaken for a highly realistic mannequin.

John is squinting at each of them, can't focus his eyes, blurting out "where the fuck is Soap?" after doing the 9th headcount. Doesn't realize he's been leaning way off to the side and tilting his head with each headcount until he almost loses his balance.

And Laswell. Poor Laswell. She's directing the extraction team with minimal help from any of these idiots, pinching the bridge of her nose and wondering how much paperwork this is going to end up in.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

based on that one video of the news reporter high as fuck as a ton of drugs are burning behind him, it's one of my favorite news videos

[valtsv]

Internal inquiry? What does that look like

so basically i got a U in my physics A(S)-Level exam (twelfth grade for people who didn't attend school in england). which means that i scored so badly that i couldn't be awarded a grade. and i attended an academically selective school which was considered one of the best public schools in the entire country (my parents' doing, i did not want to be there lol). they had never had someone get a U grade before, ever. so i made history! unfortunately though it did mean that my physics teacher had to be investigated to make sure it was my fault for being stupid and not his for being a shit teacher.

[shanastoryteller]

Happy birthday!!!! More FMA!

He’s fucking tired.

In Xerxes, he’s Van Edris. In Xerxes, he’s the son of a former slave, having narrowly escaped being born into his father’s fate by virtue of him being awarded freedom by the time of his birth. In Xerxes, he’s an uncommon commodity, an alchemist with a skill that hasn’t been seen since his father fucked off to who knows where.

In Amestris, he’s Edward Elric. In Amestris, he’s the son of Trisha Elric who was born free and died free because while there are lots of different forms of freedom, in Amestris there’s one that everyone shares. In Amestris, he’s unknown and unremarkable and no one gives a fuck about what he does.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” he says flatly.

This is what he gets for visiting his father’s country. It’s just fucking unfortunate that the really good alchemical texts are here.

He should have let Al (Van Altun, as they know him, even though the two of them having been using their Amestrian names almost their whole lives, regardless of what country they were in) do it. They’re not nearly as weird about him.

Pakor is alright, as far as kings go. He’s freed a lot of people, is poking at the laws of ownership that has governed his country for centuries to see if he can do anything about them without getting beheaded for it. He’s also known Ed since he was a barely able to walk, back when his father still made court appearances and brought the family along with him. Former slave against most talented alchemist in the country, and people tended to politely ignore the former. Hell, Ed’s been counting on the same thing since he was twelve.

Of course, now it’s coming back to bite him. People say he’s a genius, but if he was really smart he would have stayed far, far away from court. Like in Amestris, perhaps.

“You’re fluent in both languages,” Pakor says, coaxing.

“So are you,” he says accusingly. “We’re speaking Amestrian right now!”

Pakor sighs and switches to Xerxian. “You also speak Xingese and Drachman. You’re a difficult man to keep secrets from.”

“I’m also Amestrian!” he shouts. “And free, might I add! You can’t sell me off to slavery just to get some intel!”

“It’s not like we’ll brand you,” he says, affronted, and Ed is reminded that alright for a king is still pretty shitty. “We just need someone to do a little – double checking. To ensure the situation in Amestris is as it’s advertised.”

“You want to gift me to the Fuhrer to spy on him and you’re, what, just hoping he doesn’t notice that I understand everything and know everything and am, oh yeah, one of his citizens? I’ve been to Central before! With my luck, I’ll get recognized the first day here and then run out of Amestris! And, again, Amestris doesn’t have slaves! The leader of the country really can’t have one.”

Pakor sighs. “You’re very dramatic, Edris. It won’t be so bad. Here, I’ll say you’re my personal slave and that you’re on loan. It’ll be for cultural exchange purposes. He speaks Xingese, so you can communicate in that language without letting on you know Amestrian.”

Ed pinches the bridge of his nose. “This is a stupid fucking idea.”

“If you do this,” Pakor says, “I’ll give you the key to the royal library.”

Ed slowly lowers his hand, eyes narrowing. “I’ve been asking you to let me in there for years.”

“I figured I’d need to bargain it away eventually,” he says. “I was hoping you’d marry one of my daughters for it.” Having even light court obligations is bad enough, he’s in no way stupid enough to marry in. “You’re very difficult, you know. I’m your king. I shouldn’t have to bargain with you.”

“Tough shit,” Ed says, because Pakor may have known him for nearly twenty years, but that knowing goes both ways. Besides, he can’t piss him off because then he and Al will stop reparing all their shit bridges and infrastructure. “Fine. But if I lose my Amestrian citizenship over this, I’m going to be pissed.”

“Noted,” Pakor says brightly.

Uhg.

It doesn’t help that everything he’s heard about Fuhrer Mustang makes the man sound insufferable.

[obsesssedblerd]

so imagine sukuna's daughter is old enough to date and for a long time, the princess rejects every last suitor because she's super picky. at first it worries reader and sukuna, but then one day, their daughter comes home with a huge bouquet of flowers, completely lovestruck, and she goes on and on and on about how she met a guy who's just so handsome and strong and powerful. she's blushing, giggling, and swinging her legs back and forth as she talks about him. so of course, you tell her to invite him for family dinner so you and sukuna can meet him. the evening arrives, and your daughter walks in with a huge smile, and who's standing next to her, you ask?

satoru gojo reincarnated. the shock is so great that poor sukuna nearly passes tf out.

LMFAOOOOOOOOO??????????? 😭😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

omfg the way i screamed in my house just now 😭 this is so fucking funny bro PLEASE 😂 can imagine sukuna nearly fainting and his & reader's daughter is just like ?????

[egophiliac]

Bald Idia will be in my nightmares thank you so much for this 5,000,000/10

genuinely I did have a little moment of "I'm going to get absolutely razzed for pre-hair Idia, aren't I" and yet I hit post anyway, truly this is the price we pay for dedicating ourselves to our art. 🫡 (jk jk it's all good, you are having the correct reaction here.)

man, I know the question of what happens when Idia's hair gets wet has been a subject of much debate in the fandom, ranging everywhere from "instant bald" to "it turns into normal hair" (the real answer is probably a boring "nothing, because magic" but we'll find out soon enough, fingers crossed). however I do kind of like the idea of him having a secret, smaller hairstyle underneath that must remain hidden for...reasons.

[thequeenofmyownscreen]

Marisha, with the Bunnie voice : "Hey, Kexon ? What do I do that annoys you, you know ? Just ruffles your feathers."

Travis, without hesitation, deadpan : "Talking."

[theminecraftbee]

My canary is molting and I can’t decide between saving some of his larger feathers as nice little keepsakes or making the most high effort jimmy collage ever

[glassedplanets]

a few months ago giffy was like "haha hear me out, what if tattoo au" and then we blacked out and talked about nothing else for like three weeks