#this is such trash but imma post it anyway

[effervescentdragon]

wheres that post abt havimg an archenemy that doesnt even know you exist i just remembered that if i ever see denis villeneuve its on fucking sight

[iced-souls]

Scribblidoombalo’s

NEW GUY?????

[raitonsfw]

𝚜𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚌𝚘𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜 | 𝚎𝚍𝚘𝚐𝚊𝚠𝚊 𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚙𝚘 ꨄ

𝓈𝓎𝓃𝑜𝓅𝓈𝒾𝓈: Ranpo wasn’t supposed to raid the ADA’s lockers for snacks, but he does anyway. When he opens your locker and spots an enclosed box of Valentine's Day chocolate, he immediately snatched it. Of course, why would he bother to read the ingredients? Cocoa butter, milk, sugar, an aphrodisiac supplement... What could go wrong? Obviously everything; you didn’t know Ranpo was such a whiny bitch when he was horny.

warnings: 18+ mdni, smut, fem!reader, horny!ranpo, slight switch!ranpo (subby then dom), accidental aphrodisiac/drug usage, banter, begging, whining & whimpering, humiliation (ranpo has to ask reader to help him), masturbation, blowjob, ranpo’s a fucking head pusher, teasing, fingering (if you squint), implied sexual intercourse, pet names (good girl), he’s like a dog in heat frfr (or rut, whatever floats your boat), ranpo’s a bit manipulative at the very end, reader works at the ADA, reader has a crush on ranpo & kinda simps for him silently, dazai mention (typical suicide mention & he’s the idiot that started this shit lol)

a/n: hello helloo, my queue posted early but imma keep it up anyways. my lil valentine’s day event starts now (albeit early), with ranpo edogawa leading it with some sexy v-day drug consumption! my first valentine to you until thursday, feb 1st! 💌 wc: 3k. v-day m.list | m.list

divider credit: @hitobaby & @firefly-graphics

“Ranpo, what are you eating?” This was a common phrase that the Armed Detective Agency yelled, much like when you yell at a puppy when they have something in their mouth that they’re not supposed to have. Ranpo’s cheeks poked out slightly as he turned towards you, his head tilting in confusion. He was sitting on top of one of the desks, lounging about like normal but with something noticeably different in his hands; instead of the usual candy he munched on, it was a tiny red hearted box of… chocolate?

You had already started walking towards him with a bit of a rush calculated into your step, eyeing the familiar box of chocolates that were abandoned now on his lap as he leaned back. He popped another piece of chocolate into his mouth as you recognized the wretched package. He had stolen your aphrodisiac chocolate Dazai had jokingly gifted you for Valentine’s Day. “Ranpo!”

“What? You shouldn’t leave chocolate lying around when I’m here.” He said in a matter of factly tone, reaching for another one. You grabbed his wrist quickly to prevent him from eating another, throwing the near empty box in the trash. “What’d you do that for?!”

“Ranpo, those weren’t yours! And they weren’t lying around, they were in my locker!” You pulled him off of the desk by his hand and he stumbled into you slightly as he gained his footing on the floor. “You didn’t even look at the ingredients.”

“You didn’t have to trash ‘em!” He pouted at you, looking back at the trash can with an overexaggerated whine. “Why would I have to look at the ingredients? It’s chocolate.” 

“Because– they were drugged.” You barged into the restroom with him, making sure it was unoccupied. You left him in the middle to wander and he immediately took a seat on the long counter adorned with sinks. The lengthy mirror stared towards the back of him and you could see out of the corner of your eye that he was swinging his feet as you locked the door. 

“Drugged? Drugged with what?” Ranpo asked, a bit too calm. It’s like this has happened and he’s not very surprised. You’ll ask about that later, right now your main priority was getting him water and a nice place to sweat it out for the next few hours– or day considering he ate almost the entire box.

“Aphrodisiacs.” 

“Isn’t that the drug that like… stimulates you?” Ranpo interrupted your thoughts, stretching his arms out with a yawn. How was this man tired in such a constrained situation? “I don’t feel anything.” 

Maybe you should go back and read the amount that’s housed in each chocolate, you could figure out the percentage exactly and then you'd be able to gauge just how much time he would need alone. If you could get him out of the door towards his dorm, of course; that was another issue as you don’t know how fast he consumed the hearts.

“Oh trust me, you will.” You huffed out, mentally checking off everything you needed to do in order to get him out of the office. You needed to collect your paperwork so you could do it while making sure Ranpo didn’t keel over from the dosage and acquire a water bottle in case it's too late to get him to the dorms. “I’m going to get you water, stay right here okay?” 

“Sure, bring me some more snacks while you’re at it.” He leaned back against the mirror with his hands tucked behind his head, crossing his leg over the other with a sly wink at you; perhaps the only time you’d see his green eyes bright before they darkened like a storm. “Don’t keep me waiting long.” 

Fucking idiot.

As you scampered about trying to find a water bottle for Ranpo, you gathered up your belongings and wrapped your head around the situation. You were going to thoroughly kill Dazai if he hasn’t done so already himself, the thought of poisoning your coworker with a shit ton of sexual stimulants weighing heavily on your mind. You knew Ranpo most likely wouldn’t care who you got it from or why you even had it, he would probably brush it off as some weird shit you’re into. Realization suddenly hit you like a million bricks; you didn’t know him sexually, so you had no idea how exactly the aphrodisiacs would affect him.

You were close with Ranpo, but not on this level. 

You also had a slight crush on him ever since you started working with him; he had bothered you for treats on the very first day as you sat down in your office chair. You haven’t even had the chance to set up your desk, trinkets filling the box in your arms as he wheeled over in his chair to you. You liked his personality and gave him a small piece of candy you had stashed in your pocket, which was the worst mistake of your life because now he toyed with you every chance he got; whether you had snacks, candy, or a sweet drink in your hand, it was a ‘can i have some?’ 

“Ranpo?” You knocked on the bathroom door as you returned from the depths of the office, relieved to hear quiet shuffling about the tiny room.

Your relief turned to dread though when you heard his voice answer you back in a tiny whimper. “D-Don’t come in.” 

Oh, you were too late…

“I have water for you.” You said through the door, trying to bask around the uncomfortable situation that’s handed itself to you. Of course it would hit him while you were trying to find things that could help him get through it; why couldn’t the drug have waited a few more minutes?

Ranpo didn’t answer and your mind wandered, what if that dosage was lethal? Dazai would have yet another crime on his fruitful list that he so explicitly told you about, but now you’re an accomplice because the twisted chocolates were in your fucking locker. You tried to open the door, but he had locked it behind you when you had left. You could hear faint breathing on the other side, but it was too hard to make out if he was saying anything. 

“Y/N…” Ranpo managed to speak up after a few moments, quiet desperation overtaking his voice. “Why’d you have that type of chocolate in your locker anyway?” 

Oh, so he does care. It must be serious then. You hung your head against the door, a quiet sigh escaping your lips as you contemplated whether to tell him why or not. 

“Here, let me in. I can help.” You offered, gathering up the things in your hands a bit more neatly as you tried to get him to open the door. You didn’t have a choice but to stay there with him and your paperwork was sitting stale in your hands, the time ticking away and your deadlines getting closer.

“Help with what? I-I got it under control.” Ranpo stammered at the idea and you realize it sounded like you meant something else.

“Not that. I have snacks, you idiot.” 

He opened the door a few seconds after, his cape had been pulled around him towards the front of his lap and he briskly walked back to where he was sitting on the sink’s counter. You could already see the hardened bulge of his cock within the mess of the fabric that covered it and his face had become increasingly red with a blush you’ve never seen on him before. His legs were pried open on the counter and he looked so so desperate, even as he tried not to show it, he failed miserably through the small pants that huffed out of him through every syllable he managed out.

You set the snacks near him on the counter, taking in the sight of his flushed skin peeking out from underneath his clothing. He glanced towards you and your eyes immediately met the mirror in front of you, a blush creeping up on your own face. “Do you want me to stay here with you?” 

“C-Can you sit outside the door and make sure no one comes in?” Ranpo stuttered, looking away from you as he squirmed against the counter. You felt the sudden rush of heat between your legs and you tried not to stumble in front of him as you walked back towards the door. God, what a dream it would be for him to ask for your help but you knew he didn’t like you like that; he would’ve shown interest by now or have been begging on his knees for you to touch him. What a sight that would’ve been…

As you sat amongst the door in the middle of the hallway, you didn’t hear him eating his snacks which was dreadfully odd. He didn’t talk to you through the door either, the man was quiet for once; not a word spoken since you left the bathroom. It must’ve hit him really hard and all you could think about is what if he actually touched himself? What if he was pumping his cock to the thought of who knows who right now, behind the thin door that separated you too? 

You so wished you could hear the potent whimpers that slipped from his mouth as he sucked his tie between his teeth, careful to not let you hear the wretched sounds. The way that his chest would rise with heavy breaths as he went ahead and pleasured himself to get rid of the ache, the strain of his cock from those damned aphrodisiacs he was so unfortunate enough to eat. You could barely sit straight, the door awfully cold against your back as the heat emanated from you, pleading for you to touch yourself with him.

You heard one of the stall doors in the bathroom slam shut or maybe open, you didn’t know but it spooked you out of the dirty thoughts that crossed your mind. Of course you would stray off track as you sat there, thinking about your coworker– your fucking coworker. Christ, get a grip.

“Please, please, please help me Y/N.” Ranpo called out and your heart skipped a beat, taking back everything you just preached to yourself. “I can’t take it anymore, I don’t know what to do.” 

“Help you? You must be out of your mind.” You mocked back, but in reality all you’ve been thinking about was that mental image engraved in your head; he must be dripping precum by now and you couldn’t help but squeeze your thighs together to keep your slick from pooling into the middle of your panties.

“Come here, please Y/N...” He whined out, a quiet moan bouncing off the walls of the bathroom and you’ve never moved so fast in your life. It felt like you yourself had eaten one of the aphrodisiacs, how fucking needy you were for him now just because he asked for you, no– whined for you.

You opened the door, your eyes meeting the empty spot of where he was previously sitting. Then you noticed the last stall’s door open and you rounded the corner to peek inside. When you did so, you did not expect to see Ranpo fisting his cock over, his back leaning against the wall of the stall with his knees nearly buckling underneath him. 

“This is so fucking embarrassing…” Ranpo muttered out as he noticed your presence, but his hand didn’t stop pumping his cock and he let out a quiet whimper. “Y/N, help me? Shit, please–”

“Are you su–” You started to say but you were cut off by some more of his obnoxious rambling, albeit it was slightly hot as his voice knocked up a higher pitch with desperation seeping through.

“Yes, please– fuck, I just need someone to–” Ranpo gasped out, his head nearly slamming back against the wall as he bucked up into his hand. White spurts of cum painted the floor as he came (probably again), his face screwed up in pleasure with a lengthy moan. “Ah–! I need you.”

He needed you… What did you do to deserve this? Not that you were complaining, everything went according to fate in your eyes as you realized he entrusted you to take care of him during this uncomfortable situation. 

“I’m not going to get on my knees inside this tiny stall, go sit back on the counter.” You said in an even tone, trying your best to not lose your cool. You followed behind him as he hopped onto the sink, his cock still leaking with more precum as it stood proudly against the pudge of his clothed tummy.

On top of admiring that, you finally noticed his outfit; or the lack of it anyway. Ranpo’s black vest was nowhere to be seen, his light tie had come undone, and the top buttons of his white collared shirt were ripped from their threads, some hanging off loosely. He looked absolutely mangled, sweat gleaming on every inch of his skin and you knew you’d both probably never talk about this again– best to enjoy it for the time being.

“Shouldn’t have eaten those chocolates, huh?” You tutted, pushing his legs open a bit more so you fit snugly in between them. You crouched down with your knees closed, eye level with his cock and you nearly choked when you saw it twitch.

“S-Shut up and help me.” Ranpo whined out and you silently grabbed at his cock, running your hand up it. He openly groaned at the sensation, thrusting up into your hand with defeated relief. His head had tipped back, his hat nearly slipping off and you took the courtesy to reach up and place it on the counter. 

“Want me to suck it?” You looked at him through your eyelashes, teasing him lightly as your breath fanned over his cock. “Or you wanna fuck me?” 

“Both… God, please Y/N, put your mouth on it already…” One of Ranpo’s hands threaded into your hair and pushed you towards his cock and you immediately shut up, taking him into the warmth of your mouth. He was bitter and slick against your tongue, the precum dissolving against it as you lapped at it. A heady moan escaped him as you swallowed him down, his thighs trembling underneath your palm and you felt his fingers grip your hair. 

“Feels so good, shit, please keep going–” Ranpo groaned, his eyes slinking down to where your mouth hollowed out around him and he couldn’t help but push you down a bit and you gagged around him– he was thick and it was hard to breathe as he started to thrust up shallowly into your wet mouth. You braced yourself on both of his thighs now, letting him fuck up into your mouth and with watery eyes, you glanced up at him again. 

Ranpo’s entire body was on fire as you complied to his thrusts, your throat slack for his cock and he couldn’t help it– as he saw one of your hands start to unbutton the top of your dress pants and disappear into the lace of your panties, his hips jutted still and he came instantly into your mouth without a warning. 

“Fuck, atta girl…” He drew out in a long moan as he watched you swallow everything he had to give, pleasure shooting through him and his vision went a little hazy as you pulled off of him with a wet slurp. Ranpo’s eyes were still glassy with lust when he opened them, the aphrodisiac wearing down slightly but not by much. As he caught his breath, he wiped the excess that dribbled out of your mouth when you swallowed, his fingers caressing the side of your cheek. “Should’ve asked for your help sooner…”

“You came so fast…” Your voice was raw and you coughed a bit afterwards, a quiet chuckle answering you.

“Thanks to the sexy chocolate you had on hand.” Ranpo mentioned with a smirk and you pressed down on his thighs as you stood up, your legs nearly giving out from the position you were in. You fell against him, his hands coming to catch you by your waist and you realized you were close to his face now. He looked considerably better, he wasn’t nearly panting as hard now but there was still a prominent flush to his cheeks. 

“Which you shouldn’t of fucking eaten in the first place.” You retorted, pouting at him with puffed out cheeks and he laughed, his hands dragging down to the plump of your ass. You let out a surprised sound as he squeezed gently, looking you dead in the eyes still.

“Oh, boo hoo. Look where it got you.” He teased, his fingers hooking through the loops of your dress pants. “Aren’t you happy you finally got your hands on me?” 

Ranpo pulled them down in one swift motion and you blushed profusely, looking away from him quickly as his fingers swiped through the mess of your cunt. He grabbed you curtly by your chin, making you look at him again and you shook with pleasure as one of his fingers curled up into you. You moaned around your words as they spilled out of your mouth in a rushed tone. “W-What are you talking about? Ranpo…” 

“It doesn’t take my deduction skills to know you like me~ Now, why don’t you ride me like a good girl? You’d like that, huh?” He breathed out against your lips as he pressed them against yours, slipping his tongue inside swiftly whilst adding another finger to the swell of your cunt and earning a wanton moan from you.

Ranpo’s other hand made you grip his cock again, which was still rock hard against the soft cotton of his shirt. His bigger hand practically covered yours in one fell swoop as he made you start to pump him again, quiet whimpering falling against the frame of your lips. “It’s your fault, y’know… you should take care of me.”

This was going to be a long work day.

a/n: wanna get tagged in future writing posts? join my taglist!

[jellinuy]

(saw your announcement so imma get this in real fast) post jjk! ( everyone lives bc gege is a menace) gojo, reader, and suguru living together :3

( roommates! )

౨ৎ incl. satoru and suguru.

౨ৎ a/n. first time i've actually written something that's NOT a drabble in like forever. can't decide on a format!! also i thought of reader being like their shoko, so this is completely platonic! urrghhh sorry this took me forever

living with the strongest duo would include...

Big house, first of all, because Satoru bought it. I’m talking, like, the three of you live in a penthouse, big.

Two VERY different sides of the house. Satoru's messy room consisting of strewn socks on the floor and food containers littered across his desk and an unmade bed and not a single cell in his brain to fix any of it until you or Suguru get on his ass: he says he has other things to worry about.

On the other hand, Suguru is something of a nagging mother when it comes to his sector of the house. Clean sheets every week, clothes in the hamper immediately after taking them off, shoes in his closet in a neat row, etc. You and Satoru like to joke about him having OCD.

Late night snack runs!! It usually starts with one of you complaining about being hungry at an ungodly hour, way too late for snacks but craving snacks anyway. It’s usually Satoru who gets you two up by video calling you from his room, making noise until you can’t take it anymore and decide to get up.

Suguru does most of the cooking. Satoru isn’t bad at it, per se, but he’s too lazy to try and so are you, let alone make big enough batches for three people.

Suguru is also lazy at times, but less than Satoru, so you two designated him as your personal chef.

Of course, there are always days when none of you feel like cooking — those are Satoru’s favorite days. You’ll order takeout (with his money), heaped in a tangle of legs and arms across the couch as you eat and binge watch whatever you three happen to find.

Suguru usually makes you guys lunch for work or school if you ask. Or even if you don’t.

Pillow fights! Or any kind of play-fight that involves throwing things at each other. They're usually initiated by Satoru when the mood strikes, and he'll literally beat you and Suguru over the head with pillows until the stuffing is everywhere or until you physically can't breathe.

A group chat! Satoru’s a frequent texter, Suguru not so much, whether it’s to show you two a picture of a stray cat he found, to ask what’s for dinner, or to beg for something.

Strangely though, when you or Suguru question him on why the trash isn’t taken out, he goes quiet.

Those two are the kind of boys who come into your room to knock something over and just leave without closing your door.

Movie nights are a must on weekends, unless one of you is extremely busy. That’s how the three of you unwind without really saying you need to unwind. You cuddle up on the couch in pajamas in one big messy heap and turn on a movie (based on who wins rock-paper-scissors) with a mountain of sugary and salty and spicy snacks at your disposal.

The three of you trust each other completely, so deep conversations are occasional, but comfortable. Neither of them would judge you for crying or being anxious or anything, and vice versa. When you need a hug, they’re there for that, too.

It’s not rare for the three of you to share a bed, or even cuddle. Granted, it took some getting used to at first, but now none of you find it weird, and it’s comforting to have a 6 foot heated body pillow, especially during the winter.

You three have an insane amount of inside jokes, and you bicker like siblings. Anyone who doesn’t get it would probably be concerned how much you insult each other.

“Shut the fuck up Suguru, didn’t you used to swallow balls?”

“Oh, shit.”

“Satoru, aren’t you still a virgin??”

“Fuck you! Y/N, what the hell are you laughing at, didn’t your date flake on you the other day??”

“Suck my dick!”

And then you’ll go back to whatever you were doing before like it didn’t even happen.

Whenever you or Suguru need to go shopping, you usually ask Satoru to Cashapp you before you go. He pretends to put up a fight, but to a guy who sees $2,000 as pocket change, he really doesn’t care. Hell, take one of his cards, go nuts.

[infernothechaosgod]

Imma be real I think the New dream light valley quest/mickey's reaction to turning black and white could have been an attempt at a jab to "the big bad bad public domain" bc he acts so scared and smoll and afraid of turning back to his old implemented "worse" self (despite that being honestly quite out of character for him imo)

But no one cares counting me in because of how absurd some quests are that all the focus went to them instead of any plotlines and I don't blame anyone for that because jesus they did NOT learn from the minnie's clock quest Like bru stop making people gather so so much of One resource for the love of gods ŤoŤ

Also its officialy canon that oswald and mickey don't know eachother and its also canon that im dropping this game youre not making me gather over 100 trash from the ocean for one of oswalds first quests brother what

Anyways yea imma not post abt this game anymore unless something big happens, not bc I hate it or anything i honestly have nagetive 2 points to add to the conversation

so yea see ya

[i-am-not-meh]

Okay, so I was thinking about like how all of the ORV and TCF crossovers are basically just dropping Cale into the ORV universe. However, what if Cale and the others were fully integrated into the ORV universe instead?

Don't worry about trying to read the little text in the image. I'm going to expand on it... and most of it is spelled wrong or changed anyway. ALSO! Also, there are going to be some spoilers to manhwa readers, so just- um, run away!

Okay, so in this au, Kim Rok Soo was able to be born in his ment to be body, and I'm thinking that the white star either one, doesn't exist in this au due to the star stream having a sort of interference when he was doing his little body snatching thing or two, white star ended up taking Cale's body but I'm still thinking who i want more. Rok Soo will go by Rok Soo for recognizably because he can't be Cale for au. It would be too confusing, i think.

Now to expand more into constellation Rok Soo!

Now Rok Soo mainly became a constellation in order to save his compaignions. We will expand more on that when I post what Rok Soo's life was before he became a constellation. Now Rok Soo tends to sponsor children. When asked, his answer will simply be "I would be worse than trash to not even give them a chance to live."

He can give his acienct powers as stigmas along with record and instant. Why does he have record and instant? I'm planning for the abilities to be linked to his soul, so even though he was never in Korea, he still has his abilities.

I don't have his modifier name nailed down yet... by that, I mean I have absolutely no idea at all. But I do know that thanks to Star Stream rewards and all that jazz, he was eventually able to break the white star's curse on him, but it was only broken after he became a constellation.

The people he sponsors right now are,

Choi Han

Ohn

Hong

I will expand on what they use their stigmas for in later posts, but imma stop here for now.

[musicblocks]

apple juice box-fpe x murder drones trash!post

I think I’m funny, and tumblr once again butchered the quality.

i thought combining my hyper fixations would make me more sane turns out not. Anyways todays the last day of school so imma be stuck at home for like forever whomp whomp :[

i hope someone gets the joke

[just-eyris-things]

okay eyris rambling lets fucking goooo (because i dont remember if i've said any of this before)

soto spoilers so imma put a read more riiiight here.

So I was thinking and then I did some more thinking and then I thought some more! In conclusion: I've been thinking a lot lately. About Eyris.

Honestly, SotO fucking sucks for her.

All your friends and family are either dead or have left you because they have their own lives (and that's okay!!). Your girlfriend kinda disappeared without a world so I guess she dumped you. Your dragon child went for a long-ass nap, your life-long mission that you've tried so hard to avoid for most of your life is finally over and in theory you finally have what you've always wanted: freedom. There is no more Wyld Hunt, no more lose threads to pick up on. Your mission is over and you can rest peacefully in a shadow of a tree with a book in one hand and Elonian wine in the other.

So why do you feel so empty? Why do you feel like a part of you is gone now that it's all over?

So after the entire Oni business is over in Cantha, Eyris finally returns to Tyria. She tries to rest at Whale Tail Island and fails miserably. Sitting idly is not doing her any good. She hates how the moment she gets to sit down and relax, she immediately starts overthinking and having nightmares. She hates how all the problems that she avoided adressing are now resurfacing. So, she leaves for the Shiverpeaks. She could try to find Freya, right? She went missing after Bjora's Marches so...

SOTO SPOILERS BEGIN HERE. THEY SMOL BUT THEY STILL THERE.

While it keeps her occupied and she meets another norn, Yagna (more about Yagna in another post that I will eventually make, but here she goes for your "looking orbs" needs),

Eyris gets a call from "Caithe". By the Bear, she is sooo happy! Finally she's needed again. But she isn't aware of those feelings. Eyris just sighs heavily and says "well... I guess she's really gone...", then proceeds to go to the Grove to meet Caithe. Right after she gets it over with with the Reporter, she gets an unexpected letter - a letter from an old acquaintence and a Whispers agent, Laeyrin.

Laerin wants Eyris to investigate the disappearance of Wizard Tower in Garrenhoff. Eyris was hesitant but she agreed. She had nothing to do anyway. Laerin gives Eyris a little private comm device for the two of them only (she omits that latter info) and sends her on her way.

So we have:

Eyris, lost, traumatised, running away from confronting her past which causes her to get send into the demon realm

Laerin, who wants to slither back in because she's bored.

Peitha, Eyris's new brainworm. Eyris doesn't want to trust her. Eyris would still choose Peitha over her sadistic ex. Also she somehow finds Peitha's presence comforting. Peitha being in her brain somehow resembles the connection to the Dream and to Airell. Yes, it's a bit more intense since Eyris feels like she has NO privacy and that Peitha's watching and hearing EVERYTHING but... She'll take it. Eyris leans into it because something about Peitha is drawing her in. Idk, something something Eyris is trying to subconsciously replace Freya and Peitha is RIGHT THERE.

Okay ramble over. Two minor points left.

This is not where I was going when I started writing this post and

I was thinking "What if Freya and Eyris reunited in teh Wizard land or in Nayos but idk how to get Freya there so for now I am shelving this idea until I figure out how that could happen and if I realise there's no way - it goes into the idea trash can.

THANK YOU SORRY FOR THE LONG POST BYE--

[acabspocky]

Vent Post

Keep scrolling unless you want stupid events from my stupid life

Okay so my current roommate is my bestest bestie. We don't fight (occasional lil snappy comment on occasion,) and we have the same social meter

We met in SL (sober living,) as the only two nerds.

First, I was the assistant house manager at her house, then I was her only house manager for awhile, and finally, I made her my assistant house manager😈

So obvious we have been through clients relapsing @ 3am packing clients stuff in trash bags to kick them out confiscating our DOCs during room checks some rough shieeeet together— continuing to cohabitate was only logical!

Fast forward four years: we're moving again, and adding a third roommate who was also a previous client & house manager. They're also my padawan, so it feels like a great fit. We plan to move into a new place (3Be 3Ba) with our three cats.

However, Friday night, my Padawan (we'll call them Nyl) got into an argument with their current abusive roommate, and they told Nyl they had to move out immediately.

Nyl's like my kid, so I would never abandon them to the streets, so I agreed for Nyl and their kitty (Poo) to stay with us temporarily until we find out new place...so they moved in...to our 2Be 2Ba condo with our two adult cats.

Now I'm a pretty patient person, it's hard for me to get heated...but wittle PookiePoo likes to sing the songs of her people at 2am, and Nyl sleeps like the fucking dead.

So I am feeling pain and exhaustion, Obi-Wan is experiencing anxiety and neediness, and Absol (my current roomie's cat) is having NONE OF THIS SHIT.

Anyway, I'm asking the universe for more patience.

Because if I ask for strength, imma need bail money too.

[yourlocaltrashpandaa]

🗑️Welcome To The Trash Cave🗑️

As I’ve stated before; probably in a sea of posts whenever you read this. That I’m finally doing something with this dead ass account.

Fandom stuff is what I’m bring here and imma list those out. It’s going to be long ass list so bare with me. I’m might take requests if I like said request from any fandom that is of interest to you that I have listed.

One more thing: I only write x female reader. M4F or F4F

✨Masterlists✨

Characters I Write For…

Longer Works:

A Slight Bit Odd | Genshin Impact/Isekai’d!Fem!Reader ~ Ongoing

Dog Samurai | Monkie Kid FF ~ WIP

“I’m The Monkey King!” | Young Justice FF ~ Upcoming!

Small Things:

Ghost Hunter Oc x Jttw ~ Skits/Thoughts

Anime:

Fruits Basket

Ranma 1/2

Yona of the Dawn

Wolf’s Rain

Beastars

Demon Slayer

Hunter X Hunter

Bungo Stray Dogs

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventures

Tiger & Bunny

SENGOKU Night Blood

This list will grow/change depending on if I’m into an anime series or not

Tv Shows/Movies:

Lego Monkie Kid (LMK)

X-Men {Most Media}

Thundercats {1985 & 2011}

Teen Titans

Power Rangers

Star Wars

Video Games:

FNAF

Genshin Impact

Honkai Star Rail

Fire Emblem {All Media except the two new games}

Pokémon {I only play the games a rarely watch the anime}

King of Fighters

Stardew Valley

Twisted Wonderland

Hades

Zenless Zone Zero

Wuthering Waves

Other:

Sonic the Hedgehog {All Media}

Bat Family {Dc Comics}

Genderbend Disney

Ensemble Stars {All media}

Will Write:

Fluff/SFW

NSFW {it depends really}

Light Angst

Suggestive Themes

Scenarios

Ships {character x character}

Au’s

Will Not Write:

P*dophilia

Inc*st { No Step-sibling/Step-parent shít either }

Yandere {makes me wanna scream and yell}

Character S*icide

R*pe/Non-Con

OC x Character {might do that on my own but not oneshots}

Just some things get started. I do have some writings in the works at the moment so I’ll be posting those soon if I don’t procrastinate on them.

I don’t really have a set schedule for posting I just post whenever it convenient to me so yeah, though I do want to work on a schedule of things I think it might help with keeping things consistent. So I’ll work on that too.

Anyways! Hope you enjoy your stay here. Welcome to the Trash Cave!

~Trashy 🦝

[silentwillowwhisperer]

Tattoo Parlor AU pt.2

You know what? There is absolutely NO WAY I can finish this in one more post without leaving it open-ended, so I'm gonna do next part next weekend. If have to add another part, I'll do it the weekend after that, and so on.

-----------------------------

After greeting Allura, Keith eyed her friends.

They eyed him right back.

After a moment of consideration, Keith commented, "You should introduce them to Shiro. They seem like the kind of people he would like."

Allura shook her head. As much as she loved Keith and all of his surprisingly endearing qualities, he was way too much of a loner for it to be healthy.

She pointed to Lance, fixing him with a sharp look. "Well, I don't really care all too much about if these ones tickle your fancy, because my darling Lonce here wants a tattoo. After seeing your stunning work, he agreed that you simply must be the one to do it."

Keith noticed the excessive flattery, but ignored it. Allura was clearly asking to do her a favor here.

With an exasperated huff, he grabbed the taller boy's wrist and dragged him into one of the studio rooms to talk.

He could hear Pidge behind them saying, "Welp, Lance is dead. I'll have to check my schedule to see if I can make time for the funeral. Anyway, Hunk, let's split. Mr. 6 foot Crybaby can tough it out."

Lance made an indignant noise of protest right as Keith slammed the studio door shut pettily. Pidge couldn't be blamed, though. They had woken her up at 6AM and forgotten to supply her with coffee.

Keith sat down at a small table in the middle of the room. When Lance sunk down next to him, Keith took a moment to steel himself before speaking. He had been deprived of anything caffeinated that morning, too. He was not ready to deal with random sassy customers today.

Thanks a lot, Allura.

Lance sighed dramatically. "Look, Imma be nice to you only because you're gonna be sticking needles in me if I like your designs. We don't have to like each other at all, mostly because you really need a haircut, okay?"

Something told Keith that this was not going to go well.

(even if the guy currently judging his hair also happened to be a little bit very annoyingly cute.)

----------------

Ugh. I have no idea what I'm dooooiiing. Unless you guys want more trash posts like this, I'm gonna need help. Could someone message me or put some ideas in the asks? (Please please pleeease? I'm only going to continue to be annoying.)

Love you guys! Byeeeeee!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

[rembeauty777]

So apparently moonvale is a little bit trash so it kinda proves my point (the post about Jake and that other guy) but some people are not ready for that conversation

(I said apparently it’s not my personal opinion I haven’t played it yet. Before you moonvale glazers start a riot - don’t.)

I’m playing duskwood again just to get my code but Idk if there’s any point anymore I ain’t wasting my time for AI 😭 Imma try it anyway LMAO hopefully i’ll like it

If you enjoy the game that’s amazing I promise it’s not in my business to ruin your experience lol

[themaskstayson]

Since I have no one to talk to about this Deadpool fanfic I'm writing, imma just post it here to get it off my chest.

Trans!Deadpool cause I wanna write something that hurts and be very queer.

Okay! SO!!!

It's a trans AU where Wade powers won't allow HRT and he never got to transition before getting cancer and his powers. And while he can still look masculine enough, the Avengers still misgender him cause they're jerks. The idea is how some cis people will misgender trans people that they hate cause "they don't deserve it". I plan on adding another trans character that the Avengers do gender correctly and there will be some drama on that. It might be Spidey cause 2ish years ago my plan was to write t4t Spideypool and then I got sucked into COD fandom for too long and then BG3.

Spider-Man doesn't misgender him, he's kind of part of the Avengers in this AU but not really and I think imma have Daredevil and Moon Knight be part of Spidey's "crew" since in the comics they all are kind of are meh about the Avengers. Like yeah they'll help the team out but mostly cause they're in the neighborhood.

I'm leaning towards Moon Knight was part of the Avengers and got kicked out because of the shit he pulled. Also I'm leaning towards Spidey and Moon Knight dating cause why the fuck is this line of thought canon:

LIKE MARC HAD TO HAVE THOUGHT THEY DATED ON SOME LEVEL TO THINK THIS! BTW this run is trash, do not read, I'm suffering through it just for more Moon Knight content. (Like I get it's a joke but I'm RUNNING with it)

I also am one of the very few people that ship Moon Knight and Deadpool and something about that pairing fuels me but tbh I ship Wade with almost anyone just to think about him. BUT I don't want this fic to be just about romance, like it'll happen cause I'm a sucker for romance drama, but I want Wade to have friends that care about him.

Like stomaching your coworker heroes being transphobic to be civil cause you got your dream job finally and feeling like your worth as a human being be in the gutter while also having low self-esteem totally sucks. And Wade doesn't have that many friends and the few he does use him like he has no feelings cause he makes so many jokes. Honestly I'll probably have him fall in love with his friends to get the drama going but probably will settle for them being polyamorous cause Wade deserves all the boyfriends

Anyways, I decided to combine another Deadpool fic I started where he was on secret mission and he was a stripper LOLOL so I'm moving some of those ideas over but instead of Wade being excited to be a pretty boy, Wade is depressed cause he's a lady stripper who "looks like Barbie with depression".

[ethecookednoodle]

Imma be honest, I wasn't sure if I was gonna do a post about my classpect choices for my TrigunxHomestuck AU but I kept rereading Homestuck and started thinking about things and thought "why the hell not?"

Also @stuck-in-the-ghost-zone and @anachronistic-falsehood tags kept going around my head since I saw them, so this is partially because your tags were very nice thank u guys <3

All that being said, this is just gonna cover Vash and Knives because turns out tired as shit me has a lot to say and no self control so I wrote a lot and if I got into why I made Meryl and Wolfwood's classpects what they are in my AU this was gonna be way too damn long, so I'm cutting it.

Anyway, whole ass essay under the keep reading. Keep in mind I wrote this last night when I was very tired and with a raging headache (still haven't recovered from that) so this might be a bit ✨dramatic✨(and also a bit of a character analysis because, like I said, I had a lot to say but not a lot of self control.)

To begin with, I guess the reason I put Knives and Vash as the Lord of Time and Muse of Space respectively has to do with the fact that they remind me of Calliope and Caliborn for obvious reasons. They're twins of an alien species which, while not extinct per se, they're very much alone since either the other members of their species are not quite like them or, in Calliope and Caliborn's case, they are the only one's of their species in a good, universe-sized radius, among other things I’ll get to later.

But aside from that there's the fact that…I don't really see, or can't see, Vash as a Hope player. Like, sure, he's all about hope and believing in a bright future but Hope players have a very black and white way of thinking (see: Eridan and Jake). And Vash doesn’t really see things that way, he's very much aware that there are layers to the issues between humans and plants, but his insistence doesn't just come from a blind hope that maybe things will work themselves out if he believes hard enough. His insistence comes from the fact that he has spent a good amount of his 150 years of life going around No Man's Land and realizing that yes, humans are stupid and can hurt others just for the sake of hurting people, but the vast majority of them that hurt people do it because they've been cornered and are really out of options in the department of survival (see: Wolfwood, Rosa, and pretty much any petty bandit, since they’re not really out for murder but out for fucking money because they gotta eat), and that even if there are people who go out of their way to hurt others for funsies, there's just as much people out there willing to help others out (Meryl, Luida, Brad (even if he’s a prick at the beginning), Rem). It's all about circumstances and Vash knows this, he just acts dumb as a coping mechanism. Him believing things can work out comes from a place of tribute towards Rem and the knowledge that there is a way things can get better as long as it is given the time and space to be worked on (pun not intended). His vision is nuanced and his feelings towards what his brother does are complicated because he knows he has a reason to act the way he does.

Knives either knows there are layers and doesn't care or he hasn't let himself think about them, because otherwise it would shatter his idea that there's only one true ultimate villain (humanity) that must be defeated in order to attain peace, which the latter is what probably goes through his mind. And this is oversimplifying his point of view, because his disregard of human issues come from the fear of seeing Tesla's body all fucked up by humans on a relatively peaceful environment and thinking that if he doesn’t do something quick they might be next, or more specifically, that Vash will be next. If anything, Knives actually fits better as a Hope player than Vash does. He believes plants to be superior and humans the trash of creation, and thus, he must do what’s right in order to protect what he loves. It might also be because all of the Hope players we see also have this…weird way of seeing themselves as the greatest heroes in their fucked-up/stupid stories, and also because two of them are big, self absorbed assholes. Even Jake is his own kind of self absorbed asshole. One would argue that could be said of Vriska and Meenah as well, but the difference is that they actually have ground to stand on. They say they’re the shit not just for the sake of saying it, they can actually back up that claim. What I’m trying to say is that Knives sees himself as a savior to his species while failing to see that in the process he’s hurting the one person he swore to protect while also subjecting the plants and his brother to become a means to producing his “paradise”, essentially enslaving them, just as humans would have done. And if he does see it, then he justifies it by saying “there’s no other way.” Which, to be honest, reminds me a lot of Eridan in the sense that he, as the Prince of Hope, decided all hopes of beating Jack and bringing back their people were lost, so he decided to destroy the matriorb and go on a murderous rampage. It’s a very “all or nothing” mentality, which is exactly what happens with Knives. He fails to see (or decides no to see) the layers and the nuance of the situation and refuses to listen to any kind of argument against his belief. Because, let’s be real for a hot second here, when was the last time Knives really tried to hear Vash out instead of brushing him off and telling him he’s being delusional/he’s sick and needs to wake up? And by the time he actually listens to Vash when they’re flying up into space, it’s in this high-stress, very emotional moment because he’s trying not to blow a city up. But I digress. 

All that being said, I don’t really think the Hope aspect fits Knives either. 

The reason I think Time and Space fit the twins so much is because of the fact that the aspects seem to encompass the rest to some extent. They’re, to quote the wiki, “the two basic fabrics of reality” which means that without them, nothing else can exist. It’s why every successful Sburb session needs to have a Time and Space player. And if you think about it, it makes sense. For example, Space seems to be similar to the Hope aspect in the sense that their players have a very strong hold on their beliefs, they also resemble the Light aspect because their players also seem to be very knowledgeable (to some extent, i.e: the messages in the clouds in Skia and how Space players seemed to be the ones that paid the most attention to them) about stuff other aspects are not, and of course, it also has a strong relationship with the Life aspect, since it’s the Space player’s duty to breed and care for the frog that will eventually become the new universe in which life will proliferate (and not to mention, all space players have been somewhat related to life, with Jade being a botanist, Kanaya and Porrim being in charge of bringing back trollkind and Calliope being fascinated by the lives of other beings (i.e: trolls and humans) in general, despite her kind being extremely asocial). And the same can be said of the Time aspect: it’s related to death, this of course being a direct relation to the Doom aspect, the Time and Heart aspect seem to share this ability to become splintered (one with time loops and the other via soul splinters), and even though it’s more of a reach, you could say Time and Rage have relation because of the fact that both seem to be related to destruction (although the instances we’ve seen the aspect being used are by destructive classes, that’s why I say it’s more of a reach). I put very specific things as examples, but with the exception of the life and death thing (and maybe the Heart aspect thing), I think the things the Time and Space aspects encompass of other aspects are on a spectrum, and may even vary from player to player.

Obviously, all of the above is more my personal speculation than anything else, but that aside, now that I finally got to the point in my re-read of Homestuck where I’m reacquainted enough with Calliope that I understand why I think her and Vash are similar. And wouldn’t you guess it, it has to do with the fact that they were hoping for their brothers to change. Like, to be fair, in Calliope’s case, she was straight-up lying to herself, but again, to be fair, this stemmed from the fact that she had hope the game would help them understand each other and…well, you can see where I’m going with this. Vash hoped his brother would change, even if deep down he knew he wouldn’t, or at the very least, he wouldn’t change without things going south first. And it wasn’t until things started to go very south where they, both Calliope (the version that overpowered Caliborn) and Vash decided it was enough and sprung into action. I am well aware that the brother thing can also be applied to Knives and to his situation, but you get what I’m saying. 

If I wanted to go through the Caliborn and Knives comparison, then I would point out that Knives, as far as I can tell, was never squeamish about killing (at least not after the Tesla incident), and sees it as something necessary in order to make sure his plans come to fruition. That being said, I think the other thing I would point out is how driven he is. To quote the wiki yet again, Time players “value action over passive acceptance” and “tend to value the destination over the journey”, and what is Knives if not someone with a huge drive to make his dreams of a peaceful paradise for him, his brother and the rest of his kind come true, even it comes at the expense of the human race and the happiness, free will and general freedom of his brother and his kind. Since day one he’s been scheming and finding ways to make things happen, and I don’t know about you guys, but I think at the very least the amount of research he put on to Vash’s powers and how to unlock his gate despite how unbelievably limited the data on Independents were, without actually having Vash captive for 150 to study him is very impressive (and kind of (very) scary). But that’s where the similarities with them end, at the end of the day Knives is 1000 times smarter than Caliborn (and more likable, even if he’s a genocidal maniac). I just think that Knives possesses a lot of the qualities that make up a Time player, and him being a Master Class is because both Vash and Knives are stupidly powerful.

In the end, I guess it’s because the duality of both Vash and Knives’ ideals and personalities can be perfectly encompassed by the duality of the Time and Space aspects. 

(And also because I thought of a great scene between Vashwood and the image has been ingrained in my brain to such a degree that I refuse to change the classpects to something else. It’s like 50% all those things I said 50% gay stuff, ngl.)

Anyway stay tuned for the “why did you make Wolfwood the Knight of Doom and Meryl the Rouge of Light” post. It’ll hopefully be a lot shorter and less convoluted lol. 

[needtobemedicated]

I HAVE A GIFT FOR YOUUUUUUUUUU

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.

.

OK IT’S MY THOUGHTS BUT I CAN’T REALLY AFFORD TO LITERALLY SEND YOU A GIFT RIGHT NOW SO IT’S WHAT YOU’RE GETTING <333 (ily)

okay, so, in my mind, peter (3)’s a trans male, right? and- obviously- I’m not the first person to think this, won’t be the last. but. but. I posted that fic idea a while back about using would’ve could’ve should’ve with this idea as a song fic for peter. imma elaborate on that more, because the idea’s still bouncing around my head. 

skip is a piece of trash. we all know this, this isn’t new information. but he is unfortunately the kind of piece of trash that knows how to stick around in your head. so peter grows up, yeah? he moves on (or at least tries to), comes out, transitions, tries to live his best damn life. but somewhere, screaming, crying in the back of his mind, is skip wescott. 

he haunts peter, keeps him awake at night, tears streaming down his face as he covers his ears. whispering lies, spewing hatred. 

if peter didn’t already have internalized homophobia and transphobia from religious trauma (he’s jewish, but he’s also the biggest atheist you’ve ever met in your LIFE)(wait, no, I take it back, I remembered that harley exists), skip wescott would seal the deal. 

and to be clear, peter’s not a girl. he never has been, never will be. but damn if he didn’t want to just be able to say that the girl he pretended to be was his. that even if he wasn’t her, she was still him, and no one could take that from him. 

but she’s skip wescott’s. that little girl, standing in the kitchen, afraid to tell her aunt and uncle about the bad things she KNOWS isn’t right. she should be peter’s. the lie should belong to the one who told it, who housed it in their mind and body. and yet, and yet. 

anyways. my thoughts. have a good day!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I've never really thought about trans!Peter 3, usually trans!Peter 1 BUT NOW YOUVE SAID IT IM OBSESSED!!!!

crying about getting this in my inbox rn

[wonderble]

...is it bad that i'm kinda curious about the weird stuff you saw when looking for that comic link

I was kinda morbidly curious too, which is why I clicked through them. Not a huge merch person (my income isn't as disposable as much as it is "gee, i like eating") so I really never looked it up. However, fair warning , the expressions on the toys are --

Maybe they need more fiber in their diets?

Oh Mikey, we're in for it now ...

It's just my opinion, but if Rise was dependent on selling action figures and merchandise to keep its cartoon going (rather than the actual numbers of people watching it) well, erm, oh geez. ...'

Judging by ONE amazon search (putting in the key words "Rise of the teeange mutant ninja turtles" and trying to weed out Naruto and various non-rise turtles - ninja or not) it's not surprising the series was in trouble?

Take "Bug Busting Leonardo" for example. (It comes up nearly first on my search.)

It's not well articulated. Why is he holding two hoses instead of being packaged with his odachi? Once he lets them go, he'll look like he has two butt antennae.

Also, the kids can't exactly take apart his "costume" and play with him outside the "bug busters" context. And his expression .... eugh boy. This is a shame because the series itself is renown for its expressions and movements ... none of which you can recreate with this toy.

Compare it to 1980s Leonardo (which amazon also recced on the same search ...)

A lot more poseable, friendlier expression, comes with his signature weapons, AND kids can use their imaginations outside of one context/episode ... yeaaah. 2012 Leo model kit (SAME amazon rec) Also stacks up much better.

It's like they didn't even try to make RISE appealing to any age group. there were quite a few action figures, but none of our boys look very playable. Though ...

NGL, I am amused that the "shell hog Leo" has his stripes painted on the helmet. His bigger eyes in this also helps? But people are charging 84 dollars for it? OMFG no. I need to eat this week.

Then there is the infamous stampers set, complete with Shroomed up Mikey :

They all have quite a look. Right Donnie?

Anyways, most of the other stuff are party favors, stickers, bookbags and t-shirts.

I admit, this party set is not bad:

The paper masks are not bad either, TBH.

However, since I clicked on the masks, amazon thinks I need to go cosplay turtles now.

And boy, the world of turtle costumes get REALLY weird (and scanty) and what made me think about making a post in the first place. Go search at your own risk (I would include more I am running out of allowed images).

Most costumes are for the 1980s or 2012 versions. If you wanna RISE well, there are no sexy costume versions at least. Yay? But you can get their weapons? And poke an eye out?

I guess I would want to be Donatello? Maybe? It doesn't look right without the googles. Instead it looks like that old series, Fanboy and Chum Chum. Yikes.

The other boys of course get their look stolen too ... but like I said, I am running out of allowed images.

Just know that I would whack myself in the head with Mikey's Kusari-fundo. Leo's odachi has some length issues. Serious length issues. Poor Leo.

Raphael's tonfa looks the best, but you get ONE singular tofa. Yes. One. Budget cuts hit badly or something?!

All in all, much like how Nick totally trashed all its opportunities with RISE on the cartoon front, I don't think they put out much effort in the toy front either. And it's a shame. When they do try, they do it well.

BTW: Don't get me started on how amazon recced stuffies ... but not for RISE. This proves the companies DEFINITELY know how to make good merch for kids and adults, and they are HORRIBLy cute!

But nope. Not for rise.

Anyway this is getting ASS long, so Imma stop now. I hope it was worth it, stranger on the internet.

Amazon will be reccing me Sexy Splinter costumes forever now.