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muzaktomyears · 4 years ago

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thank you for the tag in the Beatles fic questions, @dusted-0negin & @cinnamontoastandtears!! <3 Sorry, I've had this in drafts for a while but it took ages to write because it got so long....

Which is why it's all going under a cut:

Have you written rpf before, or are the Beatles the first you’ve ever done it for?

My main fandom is ancient history rpf of my academic area of expertise, which is rpf, technically, though that's so divorced from the modern day that even trying to write actual analytical history of it is so close to fanfic tbh. But I am a historian and I do try hard to make it as historically-accurate as I possibly can; I don't write the main pairing based on a book or film as most people do, but on the history as I perceive it. And I try to do the same here though obviously I don't take it anywhere near as seriously lmao (or I try not to but it happens anyway because that's just my nature). (Do message me if you want to read my other fandom fic, I'm happy to give out the name!)

What’s your favorite ship to write and why?

John/Paul (sorry, I don't like smushnames, I am Old), because it's so fucking ridiculous and drama-y and you can write any version tbh, angst or fluff or smut or whatever, it has everything at different times. I am also getting in to Paul/George though largely in an unrequited way (on George's side) and of course George/Ringo which is a lovely antidote to the ott-ness of John/Paul, though I've not yet written it as an actual pairing let alone published what I have written. (I've fallen in love with George/Bob too which I did not ever expect so maybe I will return to that...?)

Easiest beatle to write?

PAULPAULPAULPAULPAUL, a thousand times Paul. It does scare me a bit because I don't even try, or at least I don't think I do, I just think of a scenario and think 'What would I Paul do??' and it just comes out endlessly until I have to physically stop myself writing more (I don't always succeed). Not sure why but yeah, I think we are fundamentally very similar people and I hate that tbh. I was and still am scared to write John but he's actually not that bad when you get down to it... at least when riffing off Paul, from Paul's POV. I still haven't finished my first John POV fic though so we'll see, his internal life terrifies me tbh, who even knows what's going on there?? Certainly not him.

Hardest Beatle to write?

Oh, George. I was a bit worried that I'd written so much Paul, and planned/mostly written John and Ringo POVs, but I still hadn't managed to come up with a George POV no matter how hard I tried. Then the other week I had a perfect idea and wrote down notes for it and it ended up over 10 pages long lmao. Again, not fully written yet so we'll see, but I did find it easy once I got going, though I did have some issues with J&P trying to take over again... but that's sort of the point of the story. I hope I can finish it soon anyway because I really enjoyed even just writing up notes for it :) I'm not sure why I find George so hard (though it seems other people do too) - I think I am quite similar to him (though nowhere near as much as I am to Paul) and strangely it works the other way round, I therefore find him harder to write. And I feel very sorry for him. I feel sorry for them all of course, but George and Ringo especially, and George most of all because he was stuck within those stupid dynamics for years before Ringo, and Ringo both because of that and by dint of his personality found it easier to disengage, where George suffered a lot in (not quite) silence, I feel, and writing his internal monologue of that wounds me to my core. I think writing break-up George would be acutely impossible for me. But yeah <3

Do you prefer to write in the original era or modern au?

Original. I will read Modern AUs and I've enjoyed them but I'm really here for at least an attempt at historical accuracy both in my own work and in other people's, so yeah. That's just my opinion though - Modern AUs are fine! Great, even! And I do like to see how people change stuff/adjust it. Just not my cup of tea.

What’s your least favorite pair to write and why? Elaborate if the reason isn’t incredibly negative!

I dunno because I haven't written many yet or at least not fully/published... I think it would be something like Paul/Dot which was just absolutely awful for both of them but especially Dot, who I am so so glad got out tbh. But we'll see.

Do you read or write more?

I read more. Though it does depend - I go through writing phases where I spent a few days/a week doing almost nothing but in my spare time, but even then I tend to read as well. I look at the main tag every day and I will give most things a try. Still haven't commented or even kudosed yet...... sorry! I will get round to it and there's a huge backlog of fics I have bookmarked (not an AO3, literally bookmarked on Chrome) to get through and comment on! <3 This summer when I have some time!!

Aus or canon compliant? If you prefer aus, what is your favorite to write about?

I do prefer canon-compliant because of the historian thing but... AUs are good too, especially if they're based on some slight divergence like 'what if x never happened/did happen?' and then it all just spins off from there. But then ridiculous AUs like what if they were in Star Trek also excite me lmao and I have at least three Star Trek prompts in my prompt list at the moment...

Is there a ship you like to see more of?

Tbh anything that's not any combination of the main 4. Like, a ship of one of them with a 'side character' can be way more interesting to me in terms of characterisation and dynamics. And even of two of the 'side characters' tbh even if it's a 'traditional' ship... idk. But in general terms: I am Obsessed with the John&Ringo relationship at the moment, not necessarily shippy but just their relationship as friends, plus the same (but less so) for Paul&Ringo, John&George, and (of course) Paul&George.

Is there an au/a trope you’d like to see more of?

omfg. Let me open my prompt document. Okay, here's a few I have either on the go or I intend to look at eventually:

- Mafia AU (obviously - the (less awful) inversion of the Kray fic, essentially!)

- Bodyswap where it's all four (and even other people too??)

- Philippines fic!!!!! Either where it all goes wrong(er) or just canon tbh

- Group therapy fic (lmfao)

- Social media AU (modern or an alt universe where they had Twitter in the 1960s idk) - mainly for Brian trying to monitor it all tbh

- Jelly bean incident fic (serious and/or crack)

- More random outsider POVs, either of famous people (I have Little Richard mostly written, and I want to do Elvis but that would take time to research) or just rando OCs (like their neighbours and stuff like that? idek)

- Just more Bob Dylan tbh, as POV character, as a side character, just being referenced, I don't even care, I love him <3

- We have quite a few 'back in time' ones (and I've written one too) but........... what about 'forward in time'???? IMAGINE THAT. >:)

Okay I'm going to stop there before I give away all my ideas lmfao (not really, I have at least 50 others oh god) <33

What’s a fanfic trope pet peeve?

Hmmm. Not sure because like I said, I will give almost anything a try, and I tend to be convinced to some degree by most things even if it's not my idea of the characters (esp re: Paul). But yeah the stereotypes thing gets old very fast, unless you do something very clever with it, and the wife-bashing or even just wife-ignoring tbh (or other character-bashing, even of guys). And the ones where you can tell that the author has an absolute fave that they put most of their effort into (though not always to great effect). I admit that I do this too (well, not much effort lmao) but I do try to write the others as well as I can and not stereotype them, especially in serious fic. This isn't only a problem in this fandom tbf - it occurs in every fandom, especially in the main pairing, and you wonder wtf people are doing writing it if they love one character so much that they see none of their faults and hate the other so that they see only faults. It's weird. But yeah.

Other little things: I feel that people tend to write people being too (immediately) forgiving of John&Paul, and not even of their weird relationship but just stuff like wanting to have careers in music when it looked like throwing their lives away. Especially thinking of Mimi and Jim here but applies to a lot of people tbh.

Also, not a trope as such but: the Americanisms do get to me because I am super petty, sorry! I don't immediately backclick or anything but it does pull me out of even the best fic. Some are very easy to fix (like 'closet' or 'couch') but others are harder to pin down if you don't have close knowledge of vocab. tbh I even dislike some Britishisms that I don't think are accurate to their place or time or class (especially). But this is just one of my many Issues that I have even irl with friends who call it a sofa and a lounge etc., so please ignore me!

Do you prefer to write one shots or multi-chaptered fics?

One shots. I have never written a multi-chaptered fic in my life in any fandom. I don't like not knowing where it's going, so I do have to plan at least an ending before I start writing. I've tried to get more into it here but it still terrifies me. I don't want to become the WiP-abandoner! :(

On a scale from 1 to 10 how much have fanfiction taken over your life?

Right now?? Like, 8. I have other stuff to be doing but it is always at the back of my mind lmao.

Do you have an author you look up to?

Oh god. I haven't been here long so I'm not fully versed in what's been written, especially a while ago, but yeah, I have so many. Sorry, I cannot list them or we'd be here all day but see my answer to the next question for some of them (though by no means all!).

What is a fic you can’t get tired of, no matter how many times you’ve read it?

I haven't re-read many as I don't have the time yet, but here's some that I have or am fully intending to read again properly (a lot of these authors I'm not aware of as having tumblrs, so please let me know if they do so I can link them here too!):

- 'metered' by @fingersfallingupwards - as I've said before this is the first thing I read in this fandom that made me think 'wow', and want to read more stuff like it

- 'What Happens in Cheshire' by cloudy_blue - because I love outsider POV more than anything and this is my favourite so far I think? (Also adore 'Tessellate' by the same author for similar reasons)

- 'Ignorance is Bliss' by bunnoculars - another great (and unexpected to me at least) outsider POV

- 'burning' by Keiser Franz/@dusted-0negin - for (the absolutely accurate) John's praise kink

- 'Mendips' by mrswinstonmccartney - because it's so well-written and I particularly love any Mimi-Paul interaction lmao (as you shall see.......)

- anything and everything by LouisWain1939 (dunno if you want me to link to your tumblr!), but especially 'Turn Me On Dead Man' which is terrifying and perfect

- 'swallow back that fear' by softsmilesandbrokenhearts - because Jim, I love Jim :( <3 This I feel is the peak level of Jim concern

- 'See Us In The Real Life' by RedheadAmongWolves - another excellent outsider POV that I ADORE <3

...that's just from a brief look at my bookmarks. So yeah. MANY <3333

Do you have a current fic obsession?

I mean, there's a lot, but right now the one I click on fastest whenever there's an update (and that is some competition!!) is 'You Like Me Too Much, And I Like You' - whoever is writing this, idk if you're even here, but I love you! Again it's not particularly how I see the characters but I just love how you're writing it and obvs I am here in the front row for any and all Paul whump haha <3

How seriously do you take fanfic writing?

On the surface not but then actually deep down I take it super fucking seriously, like, if I make one typo or mistake I WILL DIE. That is just my personality tbh. I am Paul and criticism hurts me :D

tagging: I shan't tag directly but please, other people, do this!! I did find it fascinating to analyse and I've loved reading other people's

nsfw bit below

Do sex positions (top/bottom) effect your enjoyment when reading or writing a fic?

Yeah, to an extent. I have clear preferences for both reading and writing and I tend to in most fandoms but here it's not so bad... especially because I feel the John/Paul dynamic in particular changes over time and is inherently very switchy. I've only written top John/bottom Paul so far, which is my preference, at least at the beginning, which is what I've addressed so far, but it does and will change and I'm fine with both writing and reading that. (As opposed to my other fandom where it is VERY VERY set and I find it hard to even contemplate them switching........ I have tried but my brain just slides off it lmao - very different context though and power differential especially, though in ways also very similar)

Do you have a preference over who’s who at all? If yes, then what are they?

Like I said above, I prefer bottom Paul in almost any pairing (apart from perhaps Paul/George?? and like idk Paul/Jane but even then...), but that's just personal preference, not based on much (though I could argue it...), and for John/Paul esp it changes both within a current dynamic and over time. One of the whole attractions of that pairing to me is that aspect, that they're relatively 'equal' in that and in most other respects, or at least they are in an ideal world and sort of aspire to be but that doesn't always work out...

Is there a kink you have to fight back including in every fic?

Hahaha oh god. This fandom has (re)awakened a hell of a lot of kinks that I kind of knew I had but had never written myself because I'd never found an appropriate outlet for them. So that's why I've just been sort of HEY GUYS HERE'S THE WORST THING I'VE EVER WRITTEN, AGAIN :D - so idk about any one kink, but... yeah, I do think that I cannot ever just write smut, it has to have some stupid emotional aspect to it, especially at the end. idk. That's what I like to read tbh so I try to write it too, and most of the time I cannot help myself, it just ends up with a devastating last line that ruins the rest of it, thank you, brain!! It's like an anti-kink tbh.

Otherwise: dirty talk. I am OBSESSED.

When do you feel comfortable adding a smut scene in your fic, if it matters to you at all?

idk. Some (most) of them are literally pwp and the smut is the point, and I haven't tended to do longer fics anyway so I haven't had this problem of feeling 'comfortable' to add a scene yet... But generally I do not plan at all, I just let the Muse flow, so if one happens then that's that :)

#fanfic #writing #meme

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avengersnewb · 6 years ago

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Mild spoiler for Sabre's The Prize and mention of blood.

Ok I've read the existing 11 chapters of The Prize and it is far from finished.

At least 5 more chapters? More? Well the more the better ( you know I love you @sabrecmc 💞 right? please please write long long chapters)

Still, I cannot live with the story not finished and it's eating me alive, and this plot bunny is the way I'm finishing the story in my mind until we get another chapter (is it obvious that I can't wait? It is, right?)

Ok here it goes:

Steve and Tony continue with the trip. Right before they arrive at their destination someone tries to kill Tony and duh! obviously Steve saves him.

Steve does get injured though, and I have this mental image that he kills the assassin and stands up and Tony is looking at him with awe, and that's when Steve's white robe starts to get bloody from the wound and he does not fall down, just kneels, still looking at Tony.

They rush to their destination and Steve stays in bed for a while and Tony cancels all else and does not leave his bed side and he keeps talking to him saying how sorry he is, how much Steve means to him and how much he loves him. Steve being the super soldier he is, is not completely out so he does hear Tony.

Steve is in critical condition but heals finally and Tony is super soft and all bubbly and good to Steve ( he does not say that he loves him though) .

Steve decides to go after all. He reckons Tony will understand, he will see how much Steve loves him that he was willing to sacrifice himself and all that, and he hopes that Tony will get it why Steve has done it.

The night comes, Steve leaves Tony's bed in the middle of the night and grabs the bag he's been preparing to take with him and he gets passed all the gaurds and he gets to the path between the mountains,

BUT

He suddenly remembers that Tony knew the name of those slaves at the beach, Ott and Reza, the ones that Steve did not know the name of and has a breakdown and decides to come back.

He sneaks back and finds Tony awake and :

I wanted to go, to be free to pay the price but have a choice.

But I do have a choice and I'm free as long as I have a choice.

I have a choice and I choose you, even if it means I don't get to go out of the castle ever, even if it means wearing the colar. I have a choice, I can go, but I choose to stay.

I choose to be yours.

I love you.

and he breaks off and starts crying.

Tony is extremely calm. He orders Steve to empty his bag. Steve empties the bag and there's some simple cloths and some food and boom:

A parchment falls out, Steve is terrified wondering if it's something important that Tony might think he wanted to steal and he does not touch it.

Tony still really really calm orders him to read the parchment, and

Yes

It's is a deed with Tony's signature that is freeing Steve.

So Tony knew Steve was planning to go he knew exactly when and he actually slipped the parchment in his bag so he does not get in trouble:

I love you Steve.

I had to give it to you. You gave me every thing I ever wanted and then some. You almost died for me and never asked for anything. And you stupid fool with this lousy bag, you wouldn't have survived a day with no money. But you did not take any of your gifts with you, you had every right, they are all yours.

I would've been devastated without you but I knew this is the only thing that would make you happy so i had to give it to you.

So they go back home and what they do to the kingdom when they get back and their trip to the Freeland and whether they get married or not will be left for the next work in the series, because man this is too long already!!! ( I can't even do a long plot bunny, I'm doomed)

But

that night that Steve comes back, Tony definitely punishes him. Not because he ran away as Tony never ordered him not to run away.

But he did order him not to leave the bed without permission.

And an order is still an order and it's got noting to do with the fact that Steve is now a free man.

Thanks for reading my fan fiction plot about this fine fan fiction.

#tony stark #steve rogers #stony fic rec #stony fanfic #stony #the prize #sabrecmc

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years ago

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Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: [okay so my thought is that like maybe he's been sorting out a Cass rage because he's actually going to this festival and she's fuming about it for obvious reasons but then he comes back and Janis is thinking that Harry might show up cos had that convo with Grace so she's being weird and he's like ?] Janis: [solid plan, awks all 'round, just tryna play off you've been busy whilst he's been arguing like oh hi, definitely didn't hear any of that 'alright?'] Jimmy: [just going for a 🚬 immediately because he's obvs not alright] Janis: fair Janis: they could take a few tips, like Jimmy: gutted they don't know where I live then Jimmy: for that and loads of other reasons, like Janis: naturally Janis: such good craic, who wouldn't want them popping over for a cuppa Jimmy: hot water and 🍋 is nearer to the order they'd put in Janis: do you charge for that at CG? Janis: probably a couple of euro, still Jimmy: put a fancy name on it and you can charge for owt Janis: they're stupid enough to buy it Janis: we're definitely getting them the cheapest paint-thinner vodka, yeah Jimmy: what do you want? 🍾? Janis: 🙄 deffo Janis: any +1s I can get Jimmy: such a celebration 🙌 Janis: everyone's feeling it Janis: we might not end up going anyway Jimmy: what? Janis: you know, fuck knows where they're all at with it Janis: 🤞 I've convinced Grace she has to though Jimmy: fuck's sake Jimmy: whose idea were this? obvs a right dickhead Janis: yeah Janis: if we don't bottle it she can't Janis: tried her best but Jimmy: bottle her before I stay here Janis: you gotta be hot about it Janis: rude Jimmy: 😎🚬 Jimmy: come sit with me Janis: you sure Jimmy: you don't wanna? Janis: just thinking if there's any more shit news I have to give you before I do Jimmy: is there? Janis: I dunno Janis: you given any thought to who Mia's mystery guest could be Jimmy: I reckon that 🏌 trip her daddy's on might be #fake Janis: that'd make it all worth it Janis: none of us are that 🍀 Jimmy: or she's choosing now to come out with her 🤞 you will an' all Janis: shut up Janis: you're meant to think Asia is irreplaceable Jimmy: duh Jimmy: I know I'm #blessed Janis: you're the only one Jimmy: 😏 Janis: we all know Mia isn't surprising her with lizard boy Jimmy: or 🐸 from previous Janis: if we're doing a this is your life of her exes, she'll need a bus Jimmy: Alright, no need to make me jealous Jimmy: can't be arsed with the green emojis Janis: you can't be Janis: very #ungoals Janis: they're all massive slags and proud Janis: 'cept #2, who wouldn't and Tammy who couldn't Jimmy: Holly's a good name, bit prickly her Jimmy: the marding and the hair regrowth Janis: 😂 Janis: so mean Jimmy: did have to laugh when princess Ella were like mime to a sad song about it Janis: no doubt being favourite got her cocky but her comebacks were better Jimmy: wonder who'll be fave by the time we get there Janis: not her, if Holly made good on her threat Jimmy: bloody musical thrones Jimmy: could be on telly Janis: 🙄 don't say that Janis: already think they're interesting enough to film it Jimmy: I get it, that's only us, eh babe? 😏 Janis: duh Janis: why it weren't hard to 👑👑 Jimmy: pissed on my 💍 proposal, still fuming Janis: me and all Janis: chat about not getting sarcasm, you know Asia's gonna come at me with a Pinterest moodboard moment Janis: tah so much Jimmy: proper 💕 that girl Janis: mm Jimmy: leaning on your phone cos you're 🗭 about 💍👰 Jimmy: very #goals that Janis: not gonna waste any time dreaming when it's SO real am I Jimmy: you don't want a 🌠 to have a go on then? Jimmy: loads out here Janis: what a totally believable coincidence Janis: guess I better Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [coming out like oh hey] Jimmy: [patting the doorstep he's sitting on like have a seat] Janis: [doing it but raising a brow like 😏 'you gonna give me my annual report or something?'] Jimmy: ['that what you're after from me, is it?' 😏 'loads of long words'] Janis: [shrugs 'asking if you were gonna punish me seemed cliche so'] Jimmy: [a little lol] Janis: [nudges him, not in a shut up way but a how're you way] Jimmy: [puts his head on her shoulder cos not alright so gotta be OTT about it] Janis: [strokes his hair 'we don't have to go, you know, if you need to stay here...they're perfectly capable of tearing themselves apart in the meantime'] Jimmy: [makes an unimpressed noise cos can't admit that he wants to go to be with her or get into how he always needs to stay here whether he likes it or not] Janis: [smushes his face 'alright, grumpy'] Jimmy: [pushing her off but then pulling her into you at the same time as if you're not already close af to each other] Janis: ['what do you wanna do?' soft] Jimmy: [kisses her because that's always what he wants to do even though we all know that's not what she meant] Janis: [allowing it though 'cos same] Jimmy: [just a nice little make out moment to lose ourselves in and forget everything else] Janis: [you really deserve it] Jimmy: ['do you wanna go?' we know the answer is no but] Janis: ['any chance to fuck with them is a good idea, yeah' 'cos wasn't a bad one, just ehh 'cos of this Harry thing and Cass going off] Jimmy: [nods like that's that settled then cos god forbid you offer your own opinion boy] Janis: ['plus, we get to have our own tent'] Jimmy: ['there's nowt you could say or do to convince me to go if we didn't' sounds like such a challenge lol] Janis: ['stop tryna make me feel special, boy' 😏] Jimmy: ['wouldn't be very goals of me, that'] Janis: [makes face like, gutted] Jimmy: [shamelessly just touching her face nbd] Janis: [looking awayayay] Jimmy: [when that devastates you but there's nothing you can say or do because everything's so casual and so only sexual yep] Janis: [just resting your head on his shoulder now 'cos drama] Jimmy: [playing with her hair in the softest way because of course] Janis: ['what are you gonna wear then?' 'cos we're definitely all thinking about our #lewks rn] Jimmy: [such a surprised lol because not what he expected her to say obvs] Janis: ['this isn't a laughing matter' in some semblance of a Mia impression] Jimmy: [when it's probably pretty accurate so you flinch like oh no I hate that] Janis: [loling evilly, 'not doing Asia for you, get over it'] Jimmy: [💔 hands even though it means you have to stop playing with her hair for a sec] Janis: ['bitch' who we referring to here] Jimmy: [nudges her like oi cos assuming she means him] Janis: ['what you gonna do about it?' 😏] Jimmy: [playfight cos it's been a minute] Janis: ['not going to apologize to her'] Jimmy: ['if not that, what is the plan?'] Janis: [🤔 face] Jimmy: [hiding his 😍 by looking at the imaginary watch like any time you're ready] Janis: [nudges him like alright, alright 'how can we make the divide even bigger? need to get them to fight again, which really shouldn't be hard'] Jimmy: ['your sister and the tall one are already about to snap, no challenge there, if we really want to fuck her over we need to get her ultimate fave on side' shrugs because that's always the mood] Janis: ['yeah, but they always roll over, that's the problem, we have to kick it up that notch so they all go beyond that...I just don't know how, ditto what we can give that one that Mia can't, like' shrugs back] Jimmy: [gets his phone and shows her that he's messaging Asia like he really wants her boyfriend there for the lad bants because that's an easy given to annoy Mia] Janis: ['I think she's invited Harry, or she wants me to think she has or- I don't fucking know but I don't think he'll come anyway' when you just blurt that out in response 'cos as good a time as any] Jimmy: [such a look like wtf cos god knows what he'll say if he blurts something out rn cos so 😒] Janis: ['the way she didn't say...they basically give each other measurements and a star-rating usually so- don't you reckon she was trying to get at us?' shrugs like could be wrong but we all know it ain't] Jimmy: [when you get up because you know she's right and you're fuming honey] Janis: ['I know' but also like ?! reaction you can't hide] Jimmy: [he literally has no words for how fucked up this all is and how much he can't stand Mia so just the biggest sigh to ever have existed] Janis: ['there's no way he'll come, bet she ain't even asked'] Jimmy: ['that's alright then' bit of sarcasm for you there Ella lol] Janis: ['Well, ain't it?'] Jimmy: [😒 af face] Janis: ['she's a cunt, we've known that'] Jimmy: [sitting back down where you were but you're not chill at all] Janis: [getting him another 🚬 and then herself] Jimmy: [furiously 🚬 while he's trying to think of ways to fuck Mia over] Janis: sorry Jimmy: shut up Janis: well I am Jimmy: [just looking at her like don't] Janis: [shrugs like fine but is just jogging her leg up and down 'cos not cool with this and has been thinking about it since the chat] Jimmy: [puts his hand on said leg like stop it's okay] Janis: ['he's so-' lacking the words or adequately hardcore 😒 face for him] Jimmy: ['he's nowt we can't handle' but so genuinely said not like ha we're so 🥇 bants] Janis: ['we shouldn't have to, you especially but still, it's bullshit'] Jimmy: [shrugs but looking at her 'I said you're worth sticking around for, didn't I?' because everything is bullshit or worse in jimothy's life rn we know so to say that and mean it is a LOT 'not gonna change my mind 'cause of him, her or any other knobheads'] Janis: ['I-' when you can't even begin to say anything that you think matches what he's just said remotely so you just falter but the LOOK is everything] Jimmy: ['it'll be alright' said like even if it's not it still will be because he literally only cares about her so he'll make sure it is] Janis: [nods and squeezes his hand 'fuck 'em all'] Jimmy: [draws the heart with their initials in on her hand with his fingertip pressing harder than usual for emphasis and obvs using the hand she's not holding so he doesn't have to let go because they in this together and such a good team and not because he loves her or anything nope] Janis: ['draw blood or it didn't happen, baby' bravado to cover the real as hell 😳] Jimmy: [taking the invitation to do a new lovebite because we all need that distraction before shit gets any feelsier] Janis: [lean into the sex of it all kids 'cos we don't need to fake any of that to still be real[ Jimmy: [lowkey love that you're on the doorstep still] Janis: [bonjour neighbours, Ian will be thrilled and thus I am 'cos fuck you] Jimmy: [same because you make this flatwhite drama seem like a picnic sir] Janis: [true tea, like in the grand scheme of things, are we bothered] Jimmy: [he's really not we know he's only doing any of this for her and to spend time with her so] Janis: [and as much as Mia deserves payback by this point, this is all a distraction from the real mess of her life too so] Jimmy: [the truest tea] Janis: [probably do at least take this to the back lol] Jimmy: [enough people and a dog milling around to make you think someone could be about to come out of that door and convince you to move lol] Janis: [god bless] Jimmy: [take all the alone time you can get rn cos this festival is gonna be a LOT] Janis: [we know it, as much as you're low-key just like we gonna spend the whole time just 😍 at this point, 'cos fuck it, won't actually be that, soz] Jimmy: [mhmm we'll make sure Mia has a worse time but it's not gonna be all fun and games for you two] Janis: [joy of joys] Jimmy: [we should make a list of everything we wanna happen in terms of the flatwhites bs when we're done but before we start the festival fr so we can decide how to ref it] Janis: [good idea carrot] Jimmy: [cos obvs we only care how it effects jj soz not soz] Janis: [but of course, we gotta timeline the drama so we don't forget anything] Jimmy: [do we wanna now or is there anything else we wanna do in this convo?] Janis: [hmm, like she's probably gonna try and leave 'cos still in that stage of like, you don't want me to sleep over but aside from that moment, we can probs get going on the plan] Jimmy: [we could always bring out the big guns because Ian isn't gonna want him to go either but like obvs don't wanna go too hard with that before they go for a million reasons] Janis: [we can deffo do that afterwards, like they've already had a time then Ian is fuming, think that's better] Jimmy: [agreed because we know we're gonna do something to make the fwb awks on top of the flatwhites bs so his mood will be peak sick of Ian's shit] Janis: [gonna move her in so soon get over it sir] Jimmy: [alright in that vein how do you wanna do her trying to leave?] Janis: [like it clearly gets to tea time or something like that where she can be like, I'll leave you to it] Jimmy: [and he's like bit rude like it's all bants and she's a rich girl with fancy tastes and he's a poor boy who can't cook we know the drill] Janis: [and she's like don't be stupid 🙄 'cos gotta defend yourself even in bants] Jimmy: [and he's like now I'm thick as well, tah very much etc etc] Janis: ['just northern'] Jimmy: ['oi, keep taking my lines off me and what am I meant to say?' and a look that's nearly a LOOK because there's so much being unsaid and we all know it, them included] Janis: [mimes 🤐 but on his face not hers for closeness you simply do not need but clearly do] Jimmy: [picks her up which you're still not meant to do boy and puts her on the kitchen counter like you're staying that settles it] Janis: ['am I sous chef or the appetizer?'] Jimmy: [can't speak cos 🤐 but his 👀 are saying so much rn] Janis: [thinking he's being quiet 'cos the kids are like in the lounge or something so kinda like whooops 'dessert, maybe'] Jimmy: [still looking at her like are you gonna stay for that long because don't actually wanna say it in case she's like no] Janis: [shrugs like nbd 'no one's expecting me, like'] Jimmy: [releasing a breath you didn't know you were holding, like] Janis: [getting down off the counter like go on then, lemme help] Jimmy: [god knows what we're making but we're doing it together guys] Janis: [kissing his cheek 'cos he's cute] Jimmy: [properly kissing her because that made him die] Janis: [remember at calis in the kichen, a mood] Jimmy: [we should have one of the kids come in before they get too extra/the food is forgotten about entirely] Janis: [deffo] Jimmy: [who do you vote for cos very different vibes depending if it's Bobby or Cass lol] Janis: [we can be a bit mean and say its Cass] Jimmy: [LOL imagine her face just like don't mind me starving to death you two carry on] Janis: [not winning any points yet babe] Jimmy: [we know you will soon gal] Janis: what did your ex do? Jimmy: ? Janis: she must've done something to make your sister hate all of your 'gfs' that hard by default Janis: even if I am delaying her tea, like Jimmy: she did loads of things Janis: right Jimmy: @ either of them for the list Janis: you're alright Janis: not that nosy Jimmy: just 🤏 Jimmy: I get it Janis: 'course Janis: if the reason my parents hated you was worth telling I would, like Jimmy: community service ain't enough of a reason? Janis: 'course not Janis: not when you pretend you're still cool to prove you ever were Jimmy: 👎 Janis: what, you wanna go harder to be public enemy #1? Janis: 🙄😏 Jimmy: obviously Janis: you tryna displease my parents is just as weird as you tryna please 'em Janis: just pretend they don't exist, yeah Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: they ain't even in your age-range Janis: behave Jimmy: gutted about that an' all Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: gross, you Jimmy: Bill's gonna be well proud of that protest Jimmy: and your cool parents an' all Janis: piss off Janis: [😒 face] Jimmy: [hooray we can do the beloved pouty face lip thing when he of course kisses her rn oh how I've missed it] Janis: [likewise 'cos loves that so much] Jimmy: [I think it's the first time and I'm fine about it] Janis: [in that case, she's so not, forgetting you just got shaded about being extra so hard] Jimmy: [soz not soz Cass] Janis: ['you know-' being quiet enough that hopefully you aren't disturbing everyone rn '-you know how much I want you' is that a question or a statement, we love being vague] Jimmy: [there's no way he's being quiet enough if he doesn't kiss her really hard rn deal with it everyone he doesn't wanna take care of y'all he wants to be 15 and extra] Janis: [let this boy live] Jimmy: [we're living in this kitchen atm though] Janis: [gotta be up against the door like soz no one come in rn] Jimmy: [give them all the moments thank you cos there's no stopping this and we aren't sorry about it] Janis: [y'all will be fine, they won't] Jimmy: [exactly] Janis: ['I need you' 'cos close as you're allowed to get rn ty] Jimmy: [likewise say her name in response cos that's all I'm letting you say] Janis: [all ready for this trip] Jimmy: [gonna be hilarious for us but not for you] Janis: [so, let's do a flatwhite cringe checklist lol, one of them, probably Asia, needs to be schwasted and get WELL lost, like maybe her mans does show halfway through the night and is like where is she and they're like ??? and then it's dramaaaa] Jimmy: [that's a really good idea] Jimmy: [I think Grace should be the one who hooks up with a lad and then they can't get rid of him and his gaggle of mates because that'd annoy Mia so much which she swore to Janis she would do but also something she would do because Ella called her fat and Hollie should sleep with one of the others but not remember which one it is like we said] Janis: [I vibe that, oh Hollie, hmm what else, one of them needs to freak out in the crowd and have to get pulled out, that's v cringe, like it's hardly a moshpit ladies] Jimmy: [I was literally gonna say someone should go to the first aid tent for no real reason because same vibe] Jimmy: [Ella should be the crowd freaker outer because she probably doesn't like to be touched and Mia should go to the first aid tent like nearly as soon as they get there because gotta pull focus and phone her daddy for that attention she's not getting from her squad rn] Janis: [approved, what a holy show, ladies, plus if Mia does that it'd be a way to force them into a truce without them realizing like omg are you okay and all taking care of her she don't need] Jimmy: [yeah exactly what a snek and it gives her an excuse to cry over the fact Harry ain't coming without them knowing that's why like she's not upset she's just so ill okay] Janis: [obviously they'll all get white girl wasted and embarrassing with that] Jimmy: [good lord yes that's a given at least when JJ get drunk they embarrass themselves with how much they secretly love each other, state of that lot honestly] Janis: [seriously, if it's a small festival maybe the lads they hook up with are in one of the bands 'cos that'd be annoying thinking they're like famous and it's like you aren't though and you were probably shite] Jimmy: [yaaaas I love that] Jimmy: [I also vote that the weather is really crap cos JJ won't care but they would cos their hair and their lewks] Janis: ['cos it always is and you have to roll with it but they apparently didn't get the memo lol] Jimmy: [Hollie the only one vaguely appropriately dressed for festival life] Janis: [it's funny 'cos festival fashion is meant to be so effortless and none of them can ever like they'll look so try-hard and their age 'cos younger girls are like that at raves and shit too like you gotta hang] Jimmy: [mhmm so mad cos Janis looks fire whenever aren't you Mia] Janis: [their posh girl lewks, oh lord] Jimmy: [I just imagine Mia's dad being slightly weird about getting updates throughout the weekend cos he's that cringey and near incesty] Janis: [deffo, when you're in a relationship with your dad, like how's golf, how's the lads, eurgh] Jimmy: [honestly though just having that husband and wife style convo nbd] Janis: [that's why you mad he cheating on your ma, don't lie] Jimmy: [the tea, girls that are older than you but still far too young for him and everything you wish you were] Janis: [he's not even fit it's so sad and gross] Jimmy: [no happy ending for you hun] Janis: [so we've got a good idea for them, what do we wanna do with the fwb moment?] Jimmy: [I wanna fuck it up cos I'm evil but I'm not sure how yet] Janis: [hmm, let's think]

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berevityandquiet · 6 years ago

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i'm sorry that last ask was so forward and hm. ott, but i reread persephone every few months and it's... Yeah. it contains some of my favourite scenes. i'm not a big dio fan, but your portrayal is something Else, and your stylised writing is so deeply engaging some phrases get stuck in my head. i write and read a lot, and that doesn't happen often. i know it's impossible to finish something you've lost passion in, so i'm not asking for that at all. i just wanted to give praise where it's due

Oh no no, no worries! I’m glad to see you

To be frank, I never really liked how Dio was portrayed in most fan media - it always seems people always scratch the surface on what is kind of a fascinating character study he could be. Digging deeper into what it must be like to have *that* much anger and bile in you before you get vamp’d, sitting beneath the weight of an entire ocean for 100 years with nothing but your dead brother’s body to keep you company, waking up in a world that’s totally moved on without you? Yeah, it’s gonna change some perceptions

Honestly, sometimes I wonder if Dio was taking stupid pills when he hired his motley crew of idiots. Like that sounds SO MEAN - but the amount of people that followed him because they believed in his message vs the amount of people that followed him because they were getting paid was just bound to cause some problems. I feel like, yeah, he’s got an enormous ego, but he’s not so dumb that he can’t *learn*, ya know?

So I’ve been having some fun trying to make him work XD

I’d....actually lost a ton of passion for Persephone, but this message...kind of made me start thinking about it again. I think I’ll try my hand at going back to it fam - thanks fam

#Anonymous

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not-poignant · 6 years ago

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Blackwood ch15 end: OMG IS HAMISH STUPID!! (Sorry for the totally random comment but I just *cannot believe* how* incredibly stupid* this move was. No brain cells whatsoever. I'm almost at the point of giggling at it but... ugh, poor Braden is just not getting a break.) Arright moving on~

Oh yeah, totally stupid. He stopped thinking rationally a while back. I think at that point, he just wanted revenge, and it wouldn’t have ended until Braden was dead. Like, as far as he was concerned, Braden - lowest of the low in his eyes - had humiliated him, shown him up, taken from him, and left him to suffer. He was, in his own mind, completely righteous in retaking his omega.

Given that most people are killed by someone close to them, and in most murders, the partner is the one that commits the murder (in the case of a relationship or couple), it’s safe to say that there’s like tens of thousands of people who behave like this on a regular basis sadly. Some people just get so angry at what (who) they feel entitled to, that they can no longer behave safely towards anyone. And it’s partly why DV (domestic violence) and stalking and similar is such a problem irl, because the government organisations etc. don’t take people seriously when they plead their case, don’t intervene in time, the perpetrators begin to feel somewhat invincible and it usually ends up escalating to something like this.

I’ve received a few messages that Braden’s storyline is very similar to what people have experienced irl. I wish that Hamish’s stupidity was just OTT ridiculousness, and not reflective of the actual tragic stuff that goes on in the day to day of a rape culture bureaucracy that cares more about perpetrators than victims. *gets off soapbox*

Initially that scene was meant to be an abduction scene, but it occurred so close to the end that I ultimately decided to make it a brief hostage scene instead, because I wasn’t confident I could unpack the trauma of that in less than a handful of chapters. So Hamish was, at first, meant to be even more stupid.

#asks and answers #blackwood #perth shifters #spoilers #blackwood spoilers #hamish allaway #braden payne #domestic violence #stalking #hamish was *very* stupid #i wish...people didn't do shit like this in reality #and we could just talk about how extra he was instead #administrator Gwyn wants this in the queue #Anonymous

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travllingbunny · 3 years ago

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THIS.

I can't wait to see how the upcoming movie will be marketed the next year. Collins wrote this book to be as resistant as possible to the usual BS misinterpretations and shitty marketing of The Hunger Games:

oh you want to be entertained by the Games? This is all this "action-adventure" YA franchise is about, right? Bad news for you: the Games themselves are brutal, unglamorous, and take up less than 1/3 of the story (more like half of even that, since there' are more interesting things happening before, in and around the Games than during the Games).

the romance is doomed and we pretty much know it from the beginning, and unlikely to make one feel warm and fuzzy in your shipper hearts. It's just about getting to see how it's going to go wrong. (Alternatively, if you're one of those people who are like "romance was never important in THG, I see that because I'm cool and not like thrse stupid shippers" - sorry, the romance is really central to the story, as it reflects the themes of the story and the emotional and ethical development of the protagonist... i.e., for the same reasons it was pretty central in the original trilogy too.)

I'd love to see Hollywood and the media try to spin this into another "big YA love triangle" thing, because that would be absolutely hilarious. Sure, there is a sort of love triangle situation there, but it feels almost like Collins is taking the piss there going: OK, let's see you try to make this into another "Team A or Team B" thing. Good luck with that... :D (also, good job, Suzanne Collins, for managing to write an ex-boyfriend who somehow manages to be even less likable than Coriolanus fucking Snow, even while we're in the latter's head witnessing how deceptive, selfish and possessive he is. Amazing)

Or if you happen to be one of those people who thought it was so much fun to watch all those Capitol weirdos in ridiculous makeup and OTT colorful clothes, which made it so easy to forget any real world parallels and see them as the Other in the story: get ready to see a Capitol that looks normal and that's incredibly familiar. Get ready to see the world from their perspective and see that they are just like us, to see them rebuilding after a devastating war, see their incredible hatred and dehumanization of the people in the District - and understand the reasons why they developed that hatred and the need to label the District people as "animals" as a result of their own hardships and horrible experiences that made them into "animals".

Speaking of which, if you did your best to ignore the political commentary in THG, well, it's back and it's even more biting and in your face and hard to ignore.

I often hear fans complain about plotlines in various shows etc. that "no one asked for". I never liked that expression (even when it's just someone trying to point out to plorlines that were objectively bad and just done for the sake of pissing off fans - the problem with these plots is that they are bad, not that fans weren't asking for them). But in fact, writers should not be writing things that people 'asked for" (just like they shouldn't be writing things just to be edgy and piss people of).

Suzanne Collins saw fans asking for a prequel about Haymitch's games, about Finnick and Annie, about Mags, more of our lovable heroes opposing the oppression and evil of the Capitol, and ignored it, because she's done that and there was no reason to do it again. Instead she said "I'll give you what none of you asked for, the story about the coming of age of the franchise's evil tyrant and about that fourth Victor from District 12 that was mentioned once in the first book and not even by name - because I've got things to say" and this is why The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes is a great book.

The Hunger Games was never about the Games or the romance, and that’s what so many people seem to forget. I see so many hg fans focusing on Everlark and nothing else, or talking about how they wanted Suzanne Collins’ new book to be about Finnick’s Games, or Mags’ Games, or Haymitch’s Games, and while that’s all fine and dandy, I can’t help but feel as if they are missing the entire point. With the Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes, I think Suzanne Collins expressed that. She made the Games unglamorous and brutal, broke up the lovers of the story, showed how despicable and callous the Capitol and Capitol people were from the very beginning and how easily they disregarded and used the District people, and overall made one be always aware of things that in the Hunger Games could be glazed over in the favor of pomp and show. Why want more romance or another detailed story of the Games? That’s exactly what a Capitolite would want.

#the hunger games #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tbosas #suzanne collins

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maspwinj2 · 8 years ago

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So, I'm new to actually...Thinking J2 are in love. For the longest time I thought "conspiracy theory!!" but as of late, I decided to be open-minded and, well, now I see it. I was wondering, can you remember the thing or moment that first made you realize they're in love? Tbh I think they love their wives, but I don't think they're IN love with them. I get the feeling they're sweet, close friends and parents together but not in love. Again I'm VERY new so I don't truly know about the wives.

But also…Idk how to feel about Gen. Sometimes I feel like she doesn’t mesh quite as well with J2? What do you think? (Sorry if you’ve answered similar questions before, again I’m new as in like…Only today literally did I finally realize lol)

hey! it’s cool to hear you now see the light! thanks for being open minded!

for me there wasn’t a specific moment that made me go: “ok that’s it THAT is gay” lol no, it’s just an accumulation of things and looking at the big picture

so long story (not so) short:

i started watching spn in summer 2015, and dug in the fandom in september 2015 and the thing is i never gave a shit about jared and jensen and conventions and all, i figured they got along but didn’t care more than that because i was only in it for sam and dean and during those months i never EVER saw once a tinhat post or even a mention that there are fans who think j2 are together all i saw was posts by people shipping j2 being like “hahaha they are such husbands!” you know? but only in a joking shipper tone so i never took it seriously and the way i found about their relationship was purely coincidental!! so i could have never learnt about them at all if not for this coincidence!!!

i found @jaredandjensendaily blog by pure luck (i suggest you read it if you haven’t yet, it’s really great) and it was the most shockng experience of my fandom life i swear to god because i really did NOT expect something like that coming from jared and jensen lmao, i remember EXACTLY when and where it happened, and i was in a shop and i was staring at my phone for like 10 minutes like “what the fuck is THIS?????????!!!!!!!!!!!” so i was really excited and interested but it was 100% the thrill of discovering a big secret and pure juicy gossip lmao i still didn’t give a shit about j2 themselves, and she talked about j2 being together like its the most natural and obvious thing in the world (which it is but i didn’t know that at the time) and i was like “WHAT??? IS SHE SERIOUS????!!!!!”

anyway on her blog she linked “speak the truth” and said to read it if you’re a newbie so i did it and was truly impressed, i wasn’t convinced at all but i was definitely leaning on the j2 tinhat side and since i was interested i made research and started looking for tinhats blogs and all and watching conventions and little by little you start seeing the patterns and you start seeing and witnessing how much j2 love each other and since speak the truth stops in early 2013 i learnt thanks to tinhat blogs that j2 actually live in the same place which made me go “WAIT WHAT?????!!!!!” and again with time you discover new slips and inconsistencies and you see that j2 spend all their time together instead of with their “wives” lol so in the end you understand that the only logical reason that explains all of that (the slips, the inconsistencies, the them always being together and living together and raising their kids together and getting married at the same time and people they work with saying how much they get along and actually witnessing how much they get along during cons and knowing the only reason spn went for so long was because of how well they get along and the not brotherly looks they give each other etc etc etc) the ONLY reason it all makes sense is that they’re in love and have to hide it because otherwise it would put an end to the show, THIS is the key that exlains everything else, them being gay and bearding is the last piece that completes the puzzle, that explains all the weird and shady stuff that surrounds j2

so it’s been a while now that im 10000% sure that j2 are together and what they have is relationship goals and every day with more slips and the time they spend together or the damage control that comes after they look too gay (couch couch date night incident), they only convince me more and more

so yeah no, sorry, there’s no one thing that sealed the deal for me, it’s everything put together that does it and honestly i really don’t get how people can be convinced by one moment, i get when people go to conventions and see them together IRL and they’re struck by their love but just one moment?? nah man i need some cold hard facts, and catching j2 red handed in their lies, that’s what truly convince me

to me understanding j2 are together is 50% seeing how beautiful their love is and the sacrifices they make to stay together in this homophobic business and society and it’s 50% respecting myself because i hate how j2 and their PR team treat us like fucking morons and think we’re all stupid sheeps and they can sell us their bullshit narrative and we’ll swallow it and say thanks, yeah no i have my fucking pride and im not gonna let those assholes make fun of me like that no way

about the wives, youll learn little by little why people (me included) dont like them and dont believe they’re close friends

but basically danneel was a party girl, drinking, doing drugs and forced jensen into the marriage by going on the ted casablanca show assuring everyone she will marry jensen so jensen was trapped but after jj’s birth she calmed down and now shes pretty low key so now she’s the “good” beard, and also jensen is giving jobs to her entire family with the beer business and that’s annoying to me, she can fuck off

and gen was cool at first but jared was always the one doing the most OTT bearding *insert eye rolls*, also people dont like her cos she cant act and ruined ruby and she’s gotten worse and worse with the years, fighting with the Js leading to jareds breakdown in 2015 and now with all that instagram bullshit to have all the attention on her bla bla bla and with the latest vid of her with jared shes officially THE worst tm (and with this latest vid i think it’s an understatement to say she doesn’t mesh with j2 lmao) so she really needs to fuck off lol

but most of the relationship with the wives is based on behind the scenes talks so there is no hard proof of that and i suggest you make your own opinion, take your time, but just don’t believe it when j2 say they have a support system with the wives thats utter bullshit, they just push the narrative that they’re a big family to make it look normal that they (j2) spend that much time together, live together and raise their kids together and if it weren’t for those bearding arrangements j2 would never spend that much time with gen nor danneel so nope not a close friendship

#asks #i dont think this is the kind of answer you expected and im sorry lol #again thanks for being open minded!!

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scarlettlillies · 8 years ago

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A little late with this and not an anon but I'm curious. Do you have a song you like a lot? Maybe one from Eurovision...I'd love to know since you reblogged some Esc posts. Ahh stupid question, I'm sorry.

Hey no need to apologize! It’s not a stupid question at all! You’re always welcome to come and spam my inbox.

I have a TON of favourite songs. There’s so many songs out there I love that it’s impossible for me to choose that “one favourite.”

I made a small list broken in different parts, including a special one for Eurovision! I got into the ESC around 2010-2011 so my favourites don’t really go that far back.

In English:

- Sisyphus - Take Me- Brandy - Almost Doesn’t Count- Broken Bells - Holding On For Life- Lady Gaga - Bloody Mary- Amanda Marshall - Dark Horse- Madonna - Live to Tell- Washed Out - Amor Fati- Phildel - Moonsea- Donkeyboy - Silver Moon

Other Languages:

- Jüri Pootsmann - Nii Või Naa- Hitomi Tohyama - Call Me- Sonya Kay - Зоряний саундтрек(I’m not too sure what this translates to)- Keeris - Öö ja päev- INGRID - Vive Le Swing- Velly Joonas - Stopp, Seisku Aeg!(Estonian cover of Frida’s “I See Red.” Another song plays after this one but is just as good)- Anne Veski - Roosiaia kuninganna- Coeur de Pirate - St-Laurent- Metsatöll - Külmking (Warnings for naked people and violence but nothing you wouldn’t see in a horror film)

This should just be re-titled as “Estonian Music Recs” honestly…

Instrumental:

- Quixotic - Palms- HOME - Resonance- Artius - Lovin’- Matisse & Sadko - Svenska- Otto Knows - Million Voices- Ólafur Arnalds - BrotsjorEurovision:

- Animata - Love Injected- Ott Lepland - Kuula- Donny Montell - Love is Blind (Laugh all you want, I still think this is a jam! The Lithuanian version tho is 1000% better and should have been sent instead)- Poli Genova - If Love Was A Crime- Mandinga - Zaleilah- Sjonni’s Friends - Coming Home (Icelandic version is just as good!)- Michal Szpak - Color of Your Life- Elina Born & Stig Rästa - Goodbye To Yesterday- InCulto - Eastern European Funk

#Asks #kyuhu

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reasonablespeculation · 5 years ago

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You are a trooper! I'm so sorry I stirred things up on your blog! 😬😜The relationship ended - at the very least - THREE years ago. It's so weird to be bringing all of that old stuff up again. I have a stupid memory, where I remember things that are inconsequential to my every day life and forget the important things. Yay. Anyway, sorry for the OTT Margo commentary. You're the best! 😘

Hahahaha oh no worries. I’m always surprised at the direction things take on this blog. ❤️❤️

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punkscowardschampions · 6 years ago

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Janis & Grace

Janis: [When the first snap] Janis: what the fuck Grace: my reaction to you being in my inbox rn tbh babes Janis: what the hell are you doing Grace: none of your business ever Janis: it's everyone's business now don't you know Grace: & that's the only reason that you care Grace: whatever I told him not to post it Janis: are you for real Janis: yeah, he tends not to listen, did you not get that memo either Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: we ALL got it, hun Janis: evidently not Grace: oh you wish Grace: he told me everything so Janis: I bet Janis: for your own sake get over how much you hate me and love yourself a bit Janis: this is pathetic, even for you Grace: get over yourself Grace: nothing I do is about you Janis: this isn't about you Janis: and you know it Janis: come on Grace, fucking hell Grace: like I said, you wish Grace: you think I'm pathetic but what's thinking everyone's obsessed with you? Janis: get a grip Janis: he's vile and this all started because I really did not wish Janis: realistic Janis: is what it is right now Grace: OMG Grace: you first Grace: suddenly you care, I think not Grace: leave me alone, I really was living for it Janis: Yeah I care that you don't make an absolute joke out of yourself Grace: welcome to my world for like years, bitch Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: whatever, I'm not engaging in this with you Janis: I would never do this, none of us would Grace: sure Grace: that's so believable Janis: you're cracked Janis: whatever we might reckon about this family you were raised to have more self-respect than this, it's bullshit Grace: ugh shut up Grace: you're so full of it Janis: full of what Grace: I'm the family disappointment all of a sudden, okay Grace: get real Janis: did I say that Janis: don't feel sorry for yourself when you're the only one who can do something about it Grace: I don't Grace: you're the one trying to make me go there Grace: it's honestly so cringe Janis: Go where Grace: oh please Grace: you're trying to make me feel bad Grace: duh Grace: it's your thing Janis: feel bad because you're letting yourself be used and for literally the most ridiculous reason Janis: yeah, I do Janis: the fact you don't is worrying Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: you should feel bad that you're thinking so much about him when you literally have a boyfriend Grace: but sure keeping telling yourself it's about you though, babes Grace: bet the barista loves that Janis: thinking so much about him? Janis: fuck you he literally publically shamed me, not to mention the fact he lied Janis: it is about me, no matter how many times you tell yourself otherwise Grace: he shouldn't have posted the pic, he feels bad about it Grace: & he got beat up so it's not like he hasn't suffered Grace: it's gone now Grace: obvs it's shaming when lads out you Grace: but not my fault or my problem Janis: no he doesn't, Grace Janis: and shames me for what? I haven't done anything wrong Janis: it's fucked he'd do it even if I had done what he claimed but I literally haven't so that's 10x worse than it already was Grace: whatever you say, babes Grace: literally didn't ask Grace: keep your protests for your man Janis: fuck this Janis: go ahead, they're already laughing so why not Grace: thanks so much Grace: didn't need your permission though, never have Janis: yeah, you're really showing me Janis: that's what it is then, yeah Janis: think I actually like him 💔 Grace: It couldn't be less about you Grace: & I know you don't like him Grace: I'm not that stupid Janis: as I said, not about you so Janis: give him all the attention 'cos I ain't rising to it Grace: I meant what I'm doing isn't about you, bitch Grace: not thinking about you at all rn Grace: sorry about it Janis: devestating Janis: I don't care, Grace Janis: sort yourself out, that's all I'm interested in Grace: obvs Grace: keep away from me, that's all I'm interested in Grace: there's no need for us to be having this convo Grace: or any Janis: there's every need Grace: no Grace: there isn't Janis: yes, there is Janis: this is fucked and you're a mess Grace: according to you that's me true to form Grace: so like I said, stop wasting your time & mine Janis: no Grace: ugh Grace: just go away Janis: again Janis: no Grace: what are you even trying to do? Grace: other than cluttering up my inbox just like before Janis: knock some sense into you Janis: everyone is laughing at you, Grace Janis: do you want me to send you the screenshots, and this is after one stupid picture Grace: yeah obvs I want that Grace: don't be stupid Janis: you need to know Janis: imagine how bad it's going to be at School Janis: it isn't worth it Grace: like I don't Grace: like it isn't really bad at school anyway Janis: so you need to make it worse Janis: hand them more ammunition Grace: I already told you, I told him not to post the pic, okay Grace: god Janis: why did you even talk to him Janis: never mind go meet him Grace: to get him to take the picture of you down, duh Grace: but then he talked to me so Janis: and told you what you want to hear Janis: you aren't an idiot, you know it's not true Grace: am I not? since when Grace: that's all I am to you Grace: you're the one telling me what you think I wanna hear rn Janis: this isn't about what's been said between us Janis: you know it isn't Janis: it's not real Grace: this is the first time you've spoken to me since then Grace: you don't get to go back on it like that Grace: that's not real Janis: you haven't spoken to me either Janis: it can all stand if you want, I told you, I don't care Janis: I told you, this isn't about you and me Grace: why do you think I haven't spoken to you, babes Grace: you don't care Grace: acting like you do so you can get what you want isn't gonna work Grace: awks I know Janis: what I want Janis: I have nothing to gain from this Janis: it's you that'll lose everyone's respect, never mind your own Grace: then literally stop talking to me about it OMG Grace: I can't lose what I never had, can I, hun? So whatever Janis: no Janis: come on, that shit matters to you Grace: you have no idea what matters to me Janis: and this is it, is it Janis: not your family or friends, your youtube, nothing like that Janis: this random dickhead who wants to fuck me Janis: that's the hill to live and die on Janis: very convincing Grace: he only wants to cos you won't Grace: if I turned down lads for that there'd be nobody left Janis: you could turn down lads for not having a shred of decency Grace: then who's left? Grace: your boyfriend Janis: plenty of lads Janis: they don't have to be perfect or the love of your life or anything reaching Janis: but you don't have to settle for being part of some stupid fucked up attention grab Grace: stop Janis: you need to hear this Grace: I don't need anything from you Grace: & I don't want to talk to you Janis: I don't care and it isn't from me Janis: it's facts, the truth Janis: you don't get to ignore it, you can't Grace: OMG Grace: I can't keep telling you that I can literally do whatever I want Grace: get over it Janis: why do you want to do this then Grace: why would I ever tell you Janis: you don't need to, I know why Janis: ask yourself, think about it Grace: sure Janis: just sort it out Janis: alright Grace: just leave me alone Grace: go back to that Janis: whatever you want Grace: 👌👌👌 Grace: bye Janis: later Janis: [after the tattoo] Janis: get your friendship goals touched up whilst you were there too? Grace: obvs Grace: try to be home as little as possible ever duh Janis: sure Janis: if you're gonna make everyone as uncomfortable as you made Igs then probably for the best rn isn't it Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: you're the only allowed to be OTT with your PDA in the kitchen, I know Janis: yeah, 'cos Iggy is such a prude Janis: more the fact your 'boyfriend' is a horrible person with no respect for you Janis: so yeah, that was nice, put him in that position 'cos you know Mum would never sign off on that Grace: there's no respect for me anywhere Grace: soooo tragic Grace: ugh, get a hobby babes Grace: he offered when Harry got all highkey about my touch up Grace: there was no drama Janis: you first Janis: namely one that doesn't include permanently scarring your body for people who don't care about you Janis: there is drama, you ain't here Grace: & now you care Grace: cos its my drama Grace: you couldn't care less about the amount you caused when you left Grace: honestly such a hypocrite Janis: I still don't Janis: it's you that does Janis: or has always claimed to Janis: so you'll be wanting to fix this Grace: mum knows how to get a hold of me if she wants to go off Grace: be even more hypocritical than you but anyways Janis: none of them want to go off on you Janis: much as that would vindicate you, clearly Janis: they're just really sad for you Grace: sure Grace: excuse me if I don't rush home for that Janis: you love a pity party Janis: and it's all for you, no sharing Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: well I'm busy so Janis: no you ain't Grace: rude Grace: & untrue Janis: you never are these days Janis: aimless Janis: again, sad Grace: go ahead & cry about it if you want, babes Janis: she already has, like Grace: stop trying to guilt me Grace: you're the literal worst Janis: it's nothing but the truth Grace: oh sure Grace: there's nothing to cry about Grace: unlike when you disappeared Janis: yeah, probably have that talk with ma Janis: she disagrees Janis: Ri's here, sure she'll bullet point their stance for you Grace: like I said, they know how to get hold of me Janis: do they Janis: 'cos it ain't connecting, is it Grace: ugh Grace: stop talking Janis: ugh Janis: start listening Janis: and thinking Grace: listening to what? Grace: everyone thinking I'm so stupid & so tragic Grace: why would I? Janis: reason, for one Grace: no thanks Janis: not an option Grace: you don't get to tell me my options so Janis: yeah, I do Janis: unless you're clinically braindead, it isn't an option Janis: again, just facts Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: what is it Janis: not got enough attention yet Grace: I've had enough of yours Grace: but you never take the hint do you Janis: nah Janis: you ain't though Janis: you do know he's still messaging me, yeah Grace: how would I know that? Grace: I'm not going through his phone Grace: stalk much Janis: you should be Janis: highly doubt I'm the only one Janis: might want to check your friends whilst you're at it Janis: [screenshots 'cos duh] Grace: thanks yeah Janis: 👍 just doing my bit Grace: v appreciated obvs Janis: know it's not a shock but Janis: you going to dump him when you find out he's physically cheating too or is that all chill too Grace: but you had your 🤞 like Grace: so sorry I'm not 💔 Janis: yeah Janis: wouldn't hate snapping you out of this shit Grace: well I would so Janis: fairytale, is it? Janis: your family pitying you and worried to death, your friends all laughing behind your back whilst contemplating letting him get them on theirs Janis: the Gracie dream, yeah Janis: show me how right I had you pegged when I said all that shit I shouldn't have Janis: that's winning Grace: for you & the barista sure thing 💘💘💘 Grace: I don't get one Grace: & defs not with him Grace: so the fam can be as extra as they want & the girls can be as slaggy as they want Janis: this is self-imposed Janis: the martyr look doesn't suit Grace: IKR Grace: I'm exactly where I wanna be, babes Janis: no, you're not Janis: and no one is buying it Janis: not him Janis: not you Grace: it was his idea to get the tat not mine so Grace: he's obvs hating every moment Janis: nah, he's loving it Janis: the more needy he can make you look, the more points he gets Grace: good luck to the boy Janis: are you joking Janis: obviously Janis: you're aware how pathetic you look because you're doing it on purpose Janis: every post Janis: reading like satire but your audience don't know what that means Grace: sure Grace: this is literally so boring Grace: just make your point so someone else can have their turn Janis: ooh to have an inbox full of #concern Janis: keep it up Janis: might earn the intervention they never bothered having for edie Janis: that'll be nice for everyone Grace: 🤞🤞 Grace: I'll stop short of running away or trying meth though, obvs Janis: nothing #obvs about it Janis: more like her with every new boy and new ink Janis: it's uncanny, really Grace: oh please Janis: I mean it Grace: yeah, you always do Janis: what, you think you're better than her now? Grace: why can't I? you think you're better than me Grace: you didn't fuck him, well done Grace: I did & it was pretty good actually so Janis: fuck who you like Janis: don't marry them and let them treat you like shit for the world to see Grace: I wasn't planning on it but thanks for the tips Janis: you already are Janis: say to little too late but you were warned Grace: get a grip Grace: I am not Grace: we hang out & hook up it's not that deep Janis: you get matching tattoos and wax on about how goals he is like you've got something to prove Janis: not that deep Janis: you're exactly like her Janis: maybe that's what it is Janis: nice to fit in with the 'I don't fit in' crowd, yeah Janis: interesting Grace: OMG I told you that was his idea Grace: & it's how people talk Grace: I'm not like her Grace: shut up Janis: and you therefore HAD to do it Janis: you know, reckon Da's probably a bit TOO nice Janis: can still make a case for why it's okay to have all these daddy issues Janis: the real #goals Grace: seriously STOP it Janis: you Grace: it's not about dad or you or Edie Grace: god Grace: why does it have to be about everyone else Janis: that's what I'm telling you Janis: it's all about you Grace: then stop talking about them Grace: you said that you never get to have anything, that you just wanted one thing Grace: him Grace: why can't I? Grace: why can't I just do something cos I want to Janis: 'cos it's a fucked thing to want Janis: Eds really wanted to do meth and whatever she wanted all the time and guess what Janis: they all let her and she ended up fucked up and then dead Janis: family doesn't let family do that Grace: like you said, they did Janis: like I've said, they were bad parents Janis: I reckon they still are but you can disagree Grace: & you're a bad sister Grace: so am I Janis: Undoubtedly Grace: literally then what does it matter Grace: we're not a family Janis: we are Janis: like it or not Grace: no, we're not Grace: it's too late to act like it now Grace: & you're not a part of it even if we all did Janis: you ain't dead yet Janis: and I am, sorry Grace: I fucking thought you were Grace: do you know that Janis: how would I Janis: you've not spoken to me Grace: cos I can't Janis: you haven't tried Grace: bitch I've tried for years Grace: you don't want to be my sister Grace: you don't even want to be in the same room as me Janis: as I said, we unavoidably are Grace: that literally makes it worse not better Janis: do you want me to apologize for being born? Grace: I want you to stop being such a bitch all the time but it's obvs not ever happening Janis: so you do Janis: alright Janis: I'm really sorry for being born, Grace Grace: apology not accepted, babes Grace: you weren't born like this Janis: neither were you Janis: but I'm not asking you to be sorry Janis: just do better Grace: ugh here we go Grace: every convo is about how much I need to change or do better Grace: you think mum and dad are shit, doesn't mean you have to do their job, hun Janis: clearly, it does Janis: and this one, and most of them actually, is about how you need to not let people treat you like shit Grace: sure Grace: except when it's you Grace: that just needs to happen Janis: can't pick your family Janis: you treat me just as bad Janis: but as I said, don't care if we never talk again Grace: I literally do not Grace: but whatever, if you don't care, go away Grace: I'm not doing this with you, I told you before Janis: sort it out and I will Grace: there's nothing to sort out Janis: not true Grace: true as far as what you want me to do Janis: no Grace: I'm too busy for this Janis: still no Grace: just shut up OMG Janis: no Grace: Janis, seriously Grace: talking to you is like Gus & Diego on their worst days Grace: stop Grace: 🙄🙄 Janis: You're the one who doesn't seem to grasp the point here Janis: no Janis: non Janis: nein Janis: nyet Janis: etc Grace: grow up Janis: see above Grace: fine I'll mute you again Grace: have fun Grace: go off Janis: aw Janis: grow up Grace: I'm not the one being childish af Grace: you wish Janis: better than what you are being Janis: so yeah Grace: I'm so sure Grace: whatever Grace: like I said, have fun being ignored Janis: from what you reckon, I won't Janis: but you already knew that Grace: from what everyone reckons, you don't care Grace: you included Grace: honestly over it Grace: that's why I haven't tried Grace: you're literally exhausting Grace: get more back from a convo with any of the cats Janis: Nah, you aren't trying because you don't wanna hear this Janis: at least be honest Grace: I don't wanna hear every mean thought that you have about me Grace: I'm not trying cos you're such a bitch Janis: I've not said anything mean about you this entire time Grace: comparing me to her is a horrible thing to do Janis: only because you think she was a bad person or something Grace: yeah I do Janis: how's that working out for you Janis: we're all so horrible and mean and wrong Janis: does it help Janis: don't think so Grace: obvs not Grace: but she still was & you still are Janis: and what does that make you then Grace: I'm the worse, duh Grace: you've already listed all my flaws off enough times babe Grace: can't not listen to that Janis: so, you are like her Janis: what's the problem Grace: according to you yeah Janis: according to yourself Janis: sit here and tell me you think any differently Janis: if you did you wouldn't let him treat you like this, or them, and then we wouldn't need to have this conversation Grace: Not liking myself doesn't make me her, she doesn't own it Janis: like her Janis: and yes it does Grace: no it doesn't Grace: it's different Janis: how? Grace: it's not about dad for me, for one thing Grace: & my boyfriend is nothing like any of hers Grace: he's not even my boyfriend anyway Janis: what difference does that make Janis: it's all excuses Janis: she didn't like herself and looked in all the wrong places for validation Janis: you do exactly the same Grace: whatever Grace: you've got your heart set on us being so alike, enjoy it babes Janis: no Janis: like I said Janis: it's really sad Grace: not for you, you don't have any feelings about anything ever Grace: just your barista boyfriend Grace: so leave me alone Janis: yeah? Janis: if that makes you feel better, have it on me Grace: it literally makes me feel worse Grace: every time I try & talk to you for you just to say you don't care Grace: but that's how it is, babes so Janis: like I said, you aren't dense Janis: so don't act like you reckon I'd be bothering if I didn't care Grace: you don't care about me Grace: it's not about me, yeah? Grace: I'm so cringe that's as far as you're bothered Grace: Mum's so sad & Rio's actually shown her face for the first time since when Janis: Jesus Janis: firstly, no one BUT you is describing anything as cringe, ever Janis: and secondly, yeah Janis: give a shit about them if you don't me Grace: I do Grace: It was me there when you left & mum and dad were freaking out Grace: taking all the blame for being a bitch so they don't have to hear that you couldn't care less how they feel ever Grace: & you don't wanna be here Janis: so Janis: come sort this then Grace: how Grace: I can't wash the tattoo off Janis: tell them you'll stop seeing him and then do it Janis: for a start Janis: it ain't that deep so what do you care Janis: you care about them, don't you? Janis: prove it Grace: you know what he's like Grace: I can't just stop Grace: he could do worse to me than he's ever done to you Janis: he won't Grace: I don't have another boy waiting to beat him up for me Janis: I'll do it Grace: UM be serious Janis: I am Grace: I would actually have to die Grace: like I need you to fight my battles for me Janis: okay then do it yourself Janis: you don't need a lad to Janis: he's a pussy Grace: you don't Grace: I do Grace: I can't fight anyone Janis: he's not that much of a cunt, he's not gonna fight back Grace: OMG stop I'm not fighting him Grace: this is stupid Janis: I will then Janis: you can't stop me anyways so Grace: can you not Grace: literally just don't Janis: then don't let it come to that Janis: you're not staying because you know what he's like, that's insanity Grace: like its not insanity to dump someone the day you get a matching tattoo with them Grace: okay sure Janis: that's gonna be insanity no matter when you do it Janis: it looks stupid if you get divorced after 25 years Grace: ugh Grace: I'll just stay until he cheats on me then Janis: no that's worse Janis: can't you put one of your friends to use Janis: honeytrap him Janis: they get to pretend to be a decent friend, you have an excuse and you don't look like a fool because you were in on it Grace: okay that's actually not a bad idea Janis: thank you Janis: you have my screenshots so you don't even look paranoid Janis: he isn't subtle or slick so Grace: did he say anything about me? Janis: it doesn't matter what he said, or says Janis: it's all just a game to him, isn't it Grace: you've said everything else you think I need to hear Grace: just tell me, okay Janis: he was just Janis: you know, what you'd expect he'd think I wanted to hear Janis: he's an idiot Grace: duh he obvs slagged me off but what did he say Grace: I need to know Janis: okay Janis: mainly how he was just doing it to make me jealous back and Janis: for an excuse to be around me still Janis: talk about pathetic lengths to go to Janis: but that's the fun for boys like that ain't it, the chase Janis: like you said, if and once I did it we'd both be out so Janis: don't worry about it, like Grace: ew Grace: dad made him dinner and everything that's so rude Grace: did he say I was a crap shag cos that's really not true Grace: & I will have to fight him when I'm done dying Janis: 😂 Janis: I'm sorry but Janis: priorities Grace: did he though Grace: it's more important Grace: I already know he wants to hook up with you, that's not news Grace: !!! Janis: 'course he did Janis: anything to get my pants off Janis: it was almost funny how hard he was trying Grace: I'm not laughing but you do you, babe Janis: well no Janis: who knows what he meant or didn't Janis: it's all bollocks Grace: that he's gonna tell everyone & they are gonna believe Grace: he's a player & I'm a slut it doesn't matter what I do Janis: he won't Janis: 'cause you're gonna catch him out so he's just a cheater then Janis: can't defend that and tear you down Grace: but who am I even gonna ask to do this Grace: literally kill me before I ask Mia Grace: I'm actually gonna be sick thinking about it Janis: definitely not Mia Janis: take the assignment too serious and bae him herself Janis: you need him gone not on the guest list Janis: who's the least shit Grace: she can have him & his shit tattoo ideas Grace: but yeah I'll figure it out Janis: get Sophie to do it Janis: she would and wouldn't be a sly bitch about it either Grace: do you think she would, like seriously? Janis: 'course Grace: ugh okay Grace: do you want me to add you to the convo? it was your idea Janis: that's alright, you've got this Janis: just make him look like the shit he is Grace: duh Grace: thanks Grace: for like Grace: thinking of something Janis: been known to happen sometimes Janis: don't mention it Grace: I really did start talking to him to try & get him to take the picture down Grace: that wasn't a lie Janis: it's alright Janis: you aren't the only one who believed him Janis: I did mess around with him for quite a while Janis: but not as far as he said and not since Jim so Grace: well duh he does have some uses obvs Grace: if he was this cocky with nothing going on nobody would go there Grace: I knew you'd never cheat on barista boy it's ridiculous how much you're into him Grace: just like I knew you were a virgin, excuse you Janis: not good enough to warrant how much of a prick he is Janis: okay, we're done talking about that now Grace: boys are Grace: that's just 99% Grace: if I'd waited for the 1% like you, I'd still be Janis: stop tarring all lads with that brush when you only ever go for that one type Janis: you act like that's such a tragedy, we're 15, over half our year still is Janis: it ain't the norm to be in double digits like Mia Grace: cos I know where I am with that type thank you Grace: & if I have to tell you how good sex is, you're doing it wrong, babes Janis: 🙄 Janis: you could go fuck yourself, literally Janis: like I said, he ain't that good Grace: that's so pre-teen Grace: but if the choice is him or going back to that then sure Janis: yeah no one over the age of 12 wanks Grace: I'm just saying, it's more fun with someone else Grace: you're lying if you disagree Janis: depends on the person Grace: maybe I'm just bored of myself Grace: idk Janis: yeah Janis: well good luck Grace: thanks Grace: I better go home before I do anything 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: joy of joys Janis: least you have something to tell them Grace: did she really cry or did you just wanna hurt me Janis: she did Janis: but it's just about all of us really Janis: like you said, we're not a family anymore Grace: can you remember if we ever were? Grace: I don't think I can Grace: genuinely Grace: not trying to be a bitch Janis: yeah Janis: 'course Grace: ugh obvs he wants to come home with me Grace: please tell him you aren't there 🙄 Janis: are you serious Janis: god Grace: duh Grace: I've been at his this whole time Janis: how have you managed that Grace: not as stupid as you think Grace: & it's not like planned to dump him today so Janis: yeah but are you a psycho how have you sat there with him after hearing all that Grace: I obvs made him go out and get... I can't even remember what now Grace: when you wouldn't take I'm busy for an answer Janis: good Grace: except now he's back Grace: call me & pretend to be mum Grace: you love shouting at me Janis: alright 👍 Grace: thank god boys never notice literally anything Janis: he's quite thick Janis: too many rugby balls to the head Grace: 😂😂😂 Grace: is he actually any good? Grace: you'd know Janis: yeah Janis: ain't gonna play for the country or nothing but could probably cruise through a shit uni with it Janis: that's the plan, obvs Grace: Bitch you could've lied! Grace: 💔 Janis: 🙄 Janis: it doesn't make him a good boyfriend Grace: yeah but I'm not going to uni, am I? Janis: you could Janis: do you want to Grace: oh please Grace: I'd never get in Janis: 'course you could Janis: not saying you try for Oxford or nothing Grace: just not that smart, babes Grace: get over it Grace: I don't get to be like Edie that way Janis: okay, will do Janis: pick up your phone Grace: [does] Grace: 👌 v convincing Grace: I'm out Janis: 👍 stuff Janis: you're welcome Grace: IOU Janis: if you wanna, just be happy to see the back of him Grace: whatever Grace: your choice, hun Janis: no doubt if I think of something worth it I'll remember this Grace: sure Janis: talked to Soph yet? Grace: she'll do it Grace: she just got back to me Janis: no doubt be really into that if he realizes we're related Janis: ugh Grace: ew Grace: but yeah Grace: & she's a virgin too so Janis: doublepoints Grace: catch me wishing I was gay again Grace: ugh Janis: true enough, girls aren't as interested in virgins Janis: give you that Grace: boys are OBSESSED Grace: it's so stupid Janis: hoping inexperience covers insecurity in skill Grace: there's literally nothing hot about the freak outs I had when the first few times, sorry about it, boys Grace: but you do you Janis: were you really that scared Grace: duh Grace: I still get them now Grace: I'm just better at hiding it thank god Janis: why Janis: I mean Janis: what freaks you out so so much Grace: I told you, boys are the WORST Grace: they want you to look, sound & feel like a porn star all the time Grace: it's a lot Janis: I've seen the lads you've slept with Janis: they ain't putting in or needing that much effort in return Grace: they don't have to Grace: who's judging them Grace: they get patted on the back just for hooking up Janis: you Janis: there's only you and them actually there during Janis: presumably Janis: why should they not try and impress you too Grace: cos if they disappoint me, they'll try again with someone else Grace: & so will I Janis: exactly, nothing lost Grace: I wish Grace: how they rate me can lose me plenty Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: what about how you rate them, like you said Janis: no one is going there if you get that rep Grace: it's not the same Grace: cos I can be clingy or desperate or a slut or anything else negative they want to cancel out what I might say Janis: idk why you're sleeping with dickheads like that Grace: like I said, I know where I am with them Grace: what they want from me & what they don't Janis: doesn't sound very good Grace: it is what it is Janis: but if its shit and it freaks you out ??? Grace: you told me not to tar them all the same so Grace: it depends on the boy Grace: & me freaking out depends on me Grace: it's like shopping or filming or school or whatever Janis: alright then Janis: guess so Grace: if I'm not #feelingmyself 🙄 then I'm not Grace: can't shade the boys for it Janis: yeah but not gonna sit here and saint 'em unduly either Grace: 😂😂 literally don't Grace: exes for a reason, babes Janis: mhmm Janis: how do you Janis: he's not even a proper ex and it makes my skin crawl that I ever Janis: ugh Grace: like you said, I don't get to martyr myself Janis: but it's Grace: ?? Janis: I wish I'd never done it Grace: obvs Grace: I wish I'd never done him either Grace: at least you didn't Janis: you didn't waste much time though Janis: it must've been years Grace: we hooked up a lot though Grace: & I'm not getting any of my time back Janis: didn't need to know Grace: 🤷 Janis: gross Grace: DUH Grace: I literally wanna throw myself in traffic Janis: probably don't Janis: you want Ma to stop crying, remember Grace: IKR Grace: so unfair Grace: but sure I'll 😭😭😭 instead Grace: it's chill Janis: not over him Janis: you didn't like him did you Grace: ew no Grace: I'm not crying over him Grace: just me Janis: I guess you know where you stand with that too Grace: mhmm Grace: the white girl tattoo is a new thing to devastate me though Janis: at least it ain't your first Janis: or his name or something Janis: then you really would have to die Grace: OMG DON'T 😱😱😱 Grace: he'd have never let me though Grace: not that into me Janis: shoulda faked that Janis: he'd have shat himself Grace: now you tell me Grace: 💔💔 too little too late bitch Janis: nah, you could defs amp it up whilst soph is working on him Grace: true Janis: 😂 instead of 😭 Grace: already did the 😭 but sure Grace: let's pretend I didn't Grace: he didn't see it so it didn't happen Janis: I didn't either so Janis: no harm no foul Grace: 👌👌 Grace: are you gonna beat me up cos you don't get to hit him or? Janis: I can still hit him, unrelated to this Janis: he still fucked me over Janis: tried to Grace: yeah Grace: but it has been a while now babes Grace: not saying get over it but like Grace: maybe don't just randomly hit him?? Janis: we'll see Grace: how do you Grace: like I could never hit him Janis: it ain't that hard, I promise Janis: make a fist, and swing, try not to break your hand 'cos that'd be embarrassing Grace: or a nail OMG he's not worth that thanks Grace: & okay but hit him hard though, if you're going to Janis: 😏 Janis: 'course, not planning on tickling him Grace: or letting your boyfriend do it better, duh Grace: I know Janis: look, I can't help being so hard, alright Grace: 😂😂 Janis: do you reckon he'll get the hint this time Grace: maybe when you fight him Janis: yeah Janis: 'cos don't need to hide on the coach every time we have to play their school really Janis: or have all the girls from this school 🔪🔪🔪 Grace: get a restraining order, what else is Buster even good for tbh Janis: 😂😂 Janis: bring it up with Ri when you talk to her, yeah? Grace: oh god Grace: do you think she'll still be there Grace: actually worse than mum Janis: she ain't leaving, she's on one about this tattoo Janis: which is hypocritical but I probably wouldn't start with pointing that out Grace: I won't mention his name on her, like Grace: we get it you're 💍 Janis: you know she won't hear it Janis: they're special, can do what they like Janis: namely each other Grace: gross Grace: I won't point out that I also didn't do it the night we met, mum & dad Grace: you were at school together sure that does not count Janis: 🙄 Janis: and you wanna say I weren't born like this Janis: mess 'fore any of us got here Janis: no hope, babe Grace: I'll use that for my excuse when Ri starts then, yeah? Grace: just come & kill me thanks Janis: she's lucky her kids don't have webbed feet so Janis: bigger problems Janis: get some perspective, sis Janis: definitely traumatizing how often we all heard and saw 'em so kinda her fault, why not eh Grace: is that a thing? 😱😱😱 little like 🦆 babies Grace: awkward Janis: mhmm Janis: all sorts can go wrong Janis: its why the royal family look so weird, they're inbred as fuck Grace: I hate this family so much Grace: ugh Grace: & why do we have to live so far away Grace: just trying to get home OMG Janis: same, I been preaching since day 1 Janis: free house, tah gus snr Grace: 🙏🙏 okay you can be right about it if you hush Grace: v annoying Grace: having good ideas & not being wrong Grace: ew Janis: I know Janis: good at everything and you hate me for it, I remember it's all good Grace: yeah Grace: I'm sorry for the girl code violation though Grace: sooooooo rude Janis: least I didn't actually like him Janis: have to flagellate yourself or something Grace: that'd be okay, Mia takes boys I like all the time Grace: what he did to you was like Grace: & it makes what I did worse so Janis: she just needs to drink their blood, probably nothing personal Janis: and you know, you hate me, got no reason to stick to girl code when you don't for your besties even Grace: but I don't wanna be a bad sister Grace: or like her Grace: even if I do hate you Grace: cos I do stick to girl code, it's Mia who doesn't cos she believes she's a law onto herself Janis: be a good one then, if you must Janis: the others will probably appreciate, I'll try to keep complaints to a minimum Grace: what's that for you though, like don't fuck your boyfriend or straighten your hair? idk Janis: neither of those are ever happening so Janis: yeah Janis: how straightforward is that Janis: you're welcome Grace: thanks so much Grace: good talk, babes Grace: you're okay, you & him Janis: 👍 Janis: leave us the review, some people still don't believe it Grace: I mean, are you? Grace: that wouldn't be my review & you know it, bitch Janis: bit rude Janis: 'course, why wouldn't we be Grace: cos an obsessive fuckboy is literally still in your inbox daily? Grace: just maybe Janis: not like I sit there and chat w him Janis: just tell him to fuck off, more or less Grace: 👌👌 Grace: it'd just be the worst if he'd ruined it, that's all I'm saying Janis: no chance Janis: like you said, been a while Janis: and Jim always believed me so Grace: how is he so cute & so not also a twat Grace: literally never happens Janis: I dunno Janis: he's a bit of a twat Janis: works 'cos I'm such a bitch Grace: oh & I'm a worst bitch so I attract worst twats OMG Grace: I've solved it Grace: maybe I'm not thick Janis: maybe Janis: pretty solid theory Grace: won't get me into uni but still yay Janis: I mean it's just Newton's third law but in relationships, init, don't think you're getting that past plagiarism as your own Grace: but is there any way I can hit up one of my exes tonight & get it past Harry? Grace: you're full of good ideas Janis: say you want a threesome and then make him watch from the wardrobe Janis: idk Grace: sadly none of my exes are girls so I don't think he'd be into it Janis: leave that bit out Grace: also lowkey don't want him to watch me or look at me ever again but Janis: shouldn't be hard actually though Janis: just pie him off and have someone else 'round Janis: you have so much homework, you got your period etc he's not gonna insist Grace: the period thing always works Grace: but it's more can any of my exes keep me off snapchat cos he didn't & that worked out SO great Janis: unless he's that dirty of a bastard and that's an awkward way to find out Janis: oh to be a teenage boy who needs to prove he's getting laid Janis: can't you hookup with a random instead Janis: what the apps are for Grace: I'm trying to feel better not worse Grace: that's just asking for me to freakout Janis: hmm Janis: glory hole it is then Grace: you're so gross Grace: & weird Janis: it's been said Janis: by you, a lot Janis: could keep the pillow over your face but fucked yourself with the tats haven't you Grace: STOP Janis: I'm brainstorming Grace: can you not in your head? Grace: & I'm the dumb one okay Janis: just getting your input, babe Janis: surely one of your exes can keep a secret Grace: I'm 🤔🤔 Grace: but when they're all lowkey or highkey versions of the same boy well Janis: oh lord Janis: just have a wank okay Janis: so much easier Grace: yeah really wanna be alone with myself Grace: love that Janis: sure you and your mates don't circle jerk Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: like no Mia YOU look most like you're dying Grace: shut up Janis: 😩🍆👌😩 Grace: I hate you Janis: yeah Janis: I know Grace: how did I get here? Grace: & I don't mean this bus stop which is a hell of its own making Grace: ugh Janis: shit happens Grace: I'm so calling one of my intervention team to come get me Grace: public transport brings out my acne Janis: may as well Janis: use the attention to your advantage Grace: is dad there? Grace: he'll do it Janis: yeah Janis: can ask him if you want Grace: sure Grace: but why are you there? Grace: you never are Janis: oh yeah, he's actually left me and taken the kids Janis: got to move back in disgraced Grace: v hilarious babes Janis: glad my tragedy got you like that Janis: just happen to be about Grace: is your boyfriend Grace: cos if he witnesses my lecture Grace: how embarrassing Janis: he's seen the post babe Janis: damage done Janis: but won't let him watch, don't worry Grace: but he hasn't heard Ri moming me & being soooo disappointed Janis: we're in my room, you know,not thick enough or a total virgin, to let him 'round her Janis: rule #1 Grace: ugh truly Grace: mum's bad enough Grace: I fucking hate yoga okay Janis: may as well be cracking out the kama sutra on the lawn Janis: it's not sneaky, ma Janis: we get it, you've got 10 kids, you get laid Grace: & you still look good somehow 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: all the fucking obvs Grace: when I have a kid there's no way I'm springing back Grace: I don't go to the gym for like a day & it's like I was never there Janis: let yourself go, way God intended Grace: maybe I will now Grace: then he'll dump me I don't have to get Soph involved Janis: we'd have to put a feeding tube down your throat for them kinda results Janis: effort Grace: oh please Janis: what, how else you getting fat overnight Grace: like I don't know how to binge Grace: get real Janis: you aren't gonna eat 15lbs worth of chocolate in a night Janis: you'd go into a coma before you got fat, sadly Grace: it doesn't have to be overnight, the period excuse is good for days Grace: I've used it more often than I really get mine Janis: you also wanna get laid in that time Janis: you gonna make your ex stop off at maccies on the way 'round Grace: we already worked out my exes are a no-go Grace: unless I wanna be the cheater Janis: 👎 Janis: just stick with the burgers, like Janis: dependable Grace: obvs Janis: get us some nuggets Grace: you're making me hungry rn don't Grace: 😱😱😱 Janis: eat up Janis: got loads to put on Grace: ughhhhhhh Grace: as if Mia isn't gonna be enough of a bitch about this Grace: no thanks Janis: when is she not Janis: be a bitch about you wearing a different shade of lipstick so Grace: mhmm Grace: but obvs she like LOVES me & him as a couple Grace: 🙄🙄 Janis: duh Janis: she couldn't have masterminded it better herself Janis: though she tried Grace: so over it Janis: mhmm Grace: I need to break up with her too Grace: but him first Janis: just don't keep going back to him like you do her Grace: don't keep making me hate you Janis: what? Grace: you left Grace: that's why I went back Janis: okay so it's my fault Grace: no, cos it's my fault you ran away Grace: she just knows when I feel bad idk Janis: it's her lifeblood Grace: yeah Janis: have her and the other skinny one got a death pact though actually Grace: the goal isn't death Grace: she'd actually love to live forever duh Janis: I bet they egg each other on though Grace: obvs Grace: she does that with all of us Janis: it's fucked Janis: some of the rest are bitches too but none are as bad as her Grace: that's why she's 👑 babes 🙄🙄 Janis: 🙄 Grace: I just don't eat in front of her & avoid the shade, that part's easy Janis: ever? Grace: of course ever Janis: what about sleepovers Grace: like when she's asleep maybe Janis: actual midnight snacking Janis: that's mental Grace: lowkey motivating Grace: never been so thin 🙏 Janis: fucked, is what it is Grace: not like it's the most fucked thing about being in her squad Grace: like you said, she's the WORST Grace: 🤷🤷🤷 Janis: yep Grace: & if I'm worried about what a 💔 boy could do to me Grace: it's literally nothing compared to what she could or would Janis: you know her secrets too though Grace: I'm not that bitch Grace: I don't wanna be Janis: nah but just saying Grace: that's the thing though, she knows I'm not Grace: like he does Grace: ugh Janis: sometimes you have to Grace: I can't Grace: I'm not strong like you are Janis: sometimes it's the right thing to do Janis: don't have to smack her down Janis: though it would be class Grace: you know what I mean Janis: yeah Janis: where does it end Janis: what's your limit Janis: she can't cheat on you but she's done much worse already Grace: maybe I don't have one idk Grace: too done with myself Grace: it's not like I don't deserve friends like that so Janis: no one deserves friends like that Janis: they aren't even friends it's a stupid thing to call them Grace: I'm not calling them frenemies or whatever Grace: I'm not 12 Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: it's just shorthand anyway, like I call him bae but he isn't Grace: they're my boyfriend but none of them are, same difference Janis: call 'em what they are Janis: cunts Grace: 😂😂😂 Janis: right, Dad is en-route, had to finish whatever the fuck he was making as per Grace: sure Grace: at least I can have some Janis: probably made Ri's fave 'cos he's blatant Grace: well duh Grace: does he even know what our faves are? 🤔🤔 hmmm? see you dad Janis: tbf you ain't eating and when you do it's gotta be #whitegirlsafe so Janis: pains him greatly, I'm sure 😏 Grace: UM excuse you no Grace: that's just how I drink Grace: & I can't help that okay Janis: 😂 Grace: maybe I'll just strut in & start making cocktails Grace: that's a mood Janis: yeah 'cos Ri ain't gonna take over and show-off her skills on that one too Grace: distraction duh Janis: worth a shot Janis: good news anyway though Grace: has she left cos that'd be the BEST news 🙏🙏🙏 Janis: nope Janis: last I heard he was on the phone though so who knows Janis: if anyone can convince her to piss off Grace: booty call or babysitting emergency, either way, come through please Janis: 🤞 Janis: not sticking around to find out, tah Grace: he'll probably just come over & dad at me too like Grace: thanks so much boy bye Janis: 😂 Janis: like they ain't only 7 years older Janis: just 'cos you popped out kids, don't make you grown Janis: @maandpa Grace: & just cos he put a 💍 on it doesn't make you ULTIMATE GOALS Grace: ugh Janis: 🙄 Janis: shame there's no hot cousins left Janis: do it just to fuck 'em off Janis: you ain't special, lads, soz Grace: ewww Grace: I'm so sick of her & mum acting like they don't have the worst taste in men just cos they found one who stayed around OMG Grace: actually stop judging me Janis: and did dad really stick around or did you trap him 🤔🤔 Grace: truly Grace: we can all get pregnant okay Janis: I better not be able to tah Janis: not having that thing shoved up there for nowt Grace: but like technically Grace: if we weren't on all the conception on earth Janis: maybe none of us since Billie are actually his Janis: she just got way better at cheating #keepitblack Grace: maybe you're not but I literally look like avó soooooooo 🤷🤷 Grace: love what she's done for the bi stereotype though Janis: can that happen Janis: like cat litters Janis: Iggy is his clone so that's another one for him Janis: get in, boy Grace: Diego's on my team too tbh so Janis: done alright then Janis: I just look like if nan got a tan and a perm so deffo none of him to be seen Grace: 😂😂 Grace: that's why you're her fave, babes Janis: right? Janis: both such self-obsessed bitches Grace: & you just wanna hit everyone obvs Grace: loves that Janis: alright, just 'cos I said you're like Edie Janis: drag me Grace: duh Grace: never over it Janis: worked though Grace: I seriously hate you Grace: 👌👌 Grace: you also said you want me to die & I'm still here, bitch Grace: sorry about it Janis: can't win 'em all Janis: even if you're me shh don't tell Grace: literally gonna broadcast it, bye Janis: don't think peeps will believe you but never know Janis: very ready to believe I was a massive slag Grace: honey, nobody ever believes me Grace: it's fine Janis: guilty by association Grace: at least you aren't actually a massive slag Janis: 🙌🙏 Janis: still getting into heaven Grace: duh Jesus loves you, babes Grace: his foot fetish might be devastated that you aren't a slag though Janis: 💔 our lord and saviour is all in a days work for me Grace: just tell him to wait for me Grace: I've got your back, girl Janis: 👌 appreciate it Grace: 💜💜💜 Janis: you'll be glad to know we're off out so less audience 👍 Grace: 🙌🙏 Grace: are you coming back though? Janis: most likely Janis: his dad still hates me so Grace: family dinner didn't change his mind? how rude Grace: I told you to play the race card babes Janis: nah that never happened Grace: awks Grace: did he get dumped? Janis: probably Janis: I wouldn't go out with him if I were a lady of a certain age Grace: so I shouldn't hit him up tonight Grace: tragic but sure Janis: 🤢 Janis: not unless you want your daddy issues to get real Grace: OMG I don't have any Grace: stop saying it Janis: calm down 😂 Janis: you who wanna pipe Jimmy's dad all of a sudden Janis: not his winning personality, I promise you Grace: I've literally never seen him Grace: not that slaggy thank you Janis: 😏 ain't missing much Grace: & with a son like that Grace: awks Janis: Hmm Janis: I know Grace: 💔💔💔 Janis: that's the gist Janis: sure you ain't met him? Grace: men are just grown boys, babe Grace: of course I have Janis: okay you and your infinite boy wisdom 😏 Grace: ugh I wish Grace: me & my infinite boy regrets Janis: 💔 Janis: could be worse Janis: could be pregnant Grace: oh please Grace: not that stupid Janis: please don't Janis: always surrounded by fucking kids as is Grace: I'd kms before I had his baby thanks Janis: 👍 Grace: whatever Grace: I'm done thinking or talking about him Janis: sounds good to me Janis: later then yeah Grace: 👌👌 sure Grace: have fun Grace: I obvs will be living for this intervention so Grace: & I'll tell my exes you say 👋 too Janis: 'course Janis: fill in the appropriate name 'cos all the same Grace: I won't say it too highkey so they don't hit up your inbox as well Grace: v popular these days Janis: 😂 Janis: gutted Janis: such catches, each and every one Grace: mhmm Grace: why I don't need the competition from you duh Grace: already so many girls coming through Janis: yeah, and gotta hang on to Janis: kyle you dumped 3 months ago Janis: obvs Grace: exactly Grace: where are you going? pass my number out to the hottest & worst behaved, yeah? Janis: nowhere you'd be seen dead, I'm sure Janis: but you changing type now? so proud 💕 Grace: my type are everywhere, babes Grace: no need to change Grace: but ILY 💜💜 Janis: I meant they'd never been hot but Janis: backatcha ✌ out 😘 Grace: UM rude Grace: they at least had that going for them Grace: excuse you for stealing the best looking boy in our school for yourself Janis: 😂 Grace: not funny Grace: actually v offensive Janis: take it up with him Janis: not actually kidnapped him, believe it or not Grace: I've had enough rejection for one day thanks so much Janis: I mean Janis: actual rejection was ages ago really babe Grace: IS THAT MEANT TO BE COMFORTING Grace: & my exes are rn so Janis: comforting or rejecting Grace: rejecting obvs Grace: when have they ever been comforting? please Janis: damn they all actually got girlfriends rn Janis: inconsiderate Grace: not even Grace: I'm just that undesirable Janis: probably let yourself calm down first Janis: you'll be coming off batshit rn Grace: mhmm really calming going home to whatever this is Grace: dad is literally being so Grace: just drive OMG Janis: I hate it when he talks Grace: there's no english Grace: I really am getting a talk Janis: 🙄 Janis: just pretend you don't understand Janis: that really winds him up Grace: does the entire fam think this boy is the love of my life or just dad? Grace: ughhhh Janis: I mean we know his concept is a little outta whack Janis: but you did just get matching tattoos so Grace: that'll last like 6 months at most Grace: I didn't put it over my heart, did I? Janis: probably assuming the boy was meant to last at least as long then Grace: 😂😂 Grace: maybe he's forgotten which daughter I am Grace: he lasted longer than 6 days sure but Janis: only you know why but Janis: 👏 Grace: you said you know Grace: was that like a shameless lie Janis: I got my theories, duh Grace: take Em to Di, always some conspiracy with that boy Grace: *them Janis: or you could just 🗣 Grace: what does that even mean?? Janis: tell me Grace: you've got somewhere to be & so have I so Janis: 🤷 Janis: okay Grace: I'm literally talking to you now cos its this or dad Grace: no offense Janis: none taken Grace: 👌👌 Janis: we all would Grace: talk to anyone but dad Grace: yeah sure Janis: anyone is a stretch but you know Grace: not v much Grace: literally idk what to even say to him Grace: any of them Janis: what they wanna hear Grace: you make it sound so simple Janis: it is Janis: you're not with him no more Janis: you never were Janis: you were just hyperbolic on social media 'cos ?? Grace: yeah okay Grace: I can do that Janis: exactly Janis: just get off the defensive, let 'em lecture you, it'll be over quicker Grace: & if I cry Ri can't be that mad at me Grace: it's fine Janis: you'd know if that works Janis: always assumed so or why bother Grace: it works on like everyone Grace: teachers even Janis: yeah, know that Janis: skiver Grace: says you Grace: you literally never go to lessons anymore Janis: well I'm allowed, they were talking about me Janis: bit of a cheek, get your own scandals Grace: well I have now Grace: you're welcome Janis: you've piggybacked off my latest but um Janis: go off Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: 😏 Grace: can I like ask you something without you being so weird about it or? Janis: charming proposal as always Janis: but go on Grace: you said you're going nowhere I'd be seen dead which means none of them would obvs Grace: so like where can I go if I don't want them to find me Janis: and stayinghome is out of the question, yeah Grace: obvs Janis: Hmm Janis: idk Janis: any pub Janis: lbr Grace: except one 🙄🙄 I don't need nan & granddad coming at me with their opinions Janis: well no Janis: it's a big enough town, you can probably still do something you'd wanna and not see them Grace: yeah Janis: can't really do it with a place in mind, if that's what you're asking Janis: you just have to go Grace: okay Janis: but you gotta work out if away is worse 'cos tbh you'd probably have a shit time in some dive so it ain't a cure-all Grace: duh Grace: but its not as if anywhere that isn't is gonna let me in Janis: 🤷 sorry Janis: you've said many times, I don't have no hobbies Janis: probably not the erson to ask Janis: p Grace: 🤷🤷🤷 Janis: can't you just stay home Janis: do your nails, take a bath, all that shit you usually do Grace: sure Grace: but I don't want to Janis: what do you wanna do then Grace: not be alone Grace: not be me for a hot sec Grace: idk Janis: get white girl wasted then Grace: 😂😂 Grace: thanks babes Janis: well that'll do the trick Grace: lowkey already the plan but glad it's endorsed Grace: love that Janis: could be worse, could be meth Grace: if I can't handle spirits I'm not going to do well on hard drugs Grace: sorry I can't go that hard with my comparison for you Janis: 💔 Grace: v tragic Janis: truly Grace: I have to go get lectured now so you do you Janis: 👌 Janis: enjoy Grace: 👌👌

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