#this is so long and so like....disorganized im so sorry lmao

[sun-showr]

Ok, again, I liked Shadow and I should probably do my bullet point thoughts on the whole book before this but

literally what are they doing with Mothwing?

After River, I thought “ooh hoo hoo! Wouldn’t it be delicious if Mothwing became leader?” but it was mostly for fun (especially since I don’t love having another old leader, especially after Mistystar, and now especially if Squirrelflight hopefully survives to be made leader). But then after Sky it looked more like they were actually going for it with the “choose an unlikely cat” thing

But now in Shadow...Mothwing is a background cat, even more background than other formerly background characters? Despite being, by about halfway through the book, the only cat in RiverClan with any actual authority that doesn’t come from Tigerstar?? And she says and does almost nothing. She barely even does any healer work, off screen apparently suggests not even going to the Moonpool meetings anymore, she doesn’t even really fight with Frostpaw - she’s just kind of terse with her, she’s right about telling Tigerstar the truth causing problems, she snarks about Jayfeather, and attends Gatherings but says very little, despite essentially speaking for RiverClan in the two previous books. Otherwise it seems like she went from an incredibly chaotic experience having everyone in the clan look to her...to somehow having a lot of free time, and very little to say, despite losing her apprentice.

And I love getting to see more interpersonal drama in RiverClan and seeing Icewing and Harelight get more character development and the reveal of Splashtail’s machinations, but it’s bizarre how much should bring to mind Mothwing for the characters but instead she fades to the back and I genuinely don’t know if this is on purpose or not.

like

a ton of this book contrasts Tigerstar’s misguided leadership and Bramblestar’s decline

multiple characters bring up Tigerstar I and directly callout Tigerheartstar for also taking over RiverClan

multiple characters also talk about Bramblestar’s legacy, in addition to Firestar apparently always being on everyone’s mind

both of these characters are put in positions where they are trying to regain their sense of power/control, and are challenged on if they are doing the right thing

the book ends with the tension of one Tigerstar descendant deciding to do the right thing and willingly give up power, while the writing on the wall is that another will soon be fighting to keep his

HOW IS THIS ALL NOT SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME THINK OF MOTHWING, WHO HAS RECENTLY SHIRKED OFFERS OF POWER IN RIVERCLAN, AND WHO IS ALSO A CHILD OF TIGERSTAR

like it could be so good

her brother tried to take over two Clans essentially in the hope of getting one scrap more of power

but she is so dedicated to service to her Clan that she won’t risk anything that could possibly cause them harm, which she thinks includes her leadership

with so many cats constantly being like, “you’re just like tigerstar the first, taking over RiverClan, aren’t you worried about being compared to your evil kin”

why is iT NEVER MENTIONED THAT MOTHWING AND TIGERSTAR II ARE KIN ANY TIME HE’s IN RIVERCLAN?? Does she not have any #thoughts or feelings to share???

we have juicy callouts for Icewing and Harelight spending a lot of time in ShadowClan, but suddenly, mysteriously absent in this book, is anyone casting doubt on Mothwing for also spending that time there and oh yeah, also being related to both Tigerstars who have taken over RiverClan?

it would be such an amazing arc for her to lead the Clan her kin could never

to begrudgingly assume power, but then fucking kill it in a way not even Bramblestar or Tawnypelt could

like Splashtail is talking about faking a sign to appoint a malleable medicine cat

that is literally what happened to Mothwing am I not supposed to immediately think about her. why is she then barely a character in this book. why are they deliberately paralleling another Tigerkin’s attempt at taking over RiverClan

also Mothwing should be the one cat Frostpaw confidently knows did not kill Reedwhisker and was not involved in any plot. Like both Frostpaw and the reader should trust Mothwing and no one else in RiverClan at the moment lol so she should be more of an actual character goddamnit

if nothing else, shouldn’t RiverClan/Mothwing be deeply concerned now about the lack of Medicine Cat apprentices? I know they have a lot going on, but that just proves how much they need a med cat. Mothwing ain’t getting any younger (unless she gets 9 lives), there are no kits in the nursery, and Leafbare is around the corner. And also something terrible keeps happening to RiverClan leadership lol Mothwing should have a lot to say and do in the main plot, and she just doesn’t for some reason this book

[slothyykittee]

Criticism of Viv (this is a tad long and a bit disorganized, sorry):

One thing that bothers me about the whole Alastor thing (voodoo and whatnot) is that because she used real symbols, that feels like she's done enough research to see what they look like, but brushed over or didn't dig into everything else about it.

When you are unfamiliar with smth, do actual research! And also, maybe just make your own shit so you don't have to worry about this stuff lmao? Literally could've made her own symbols or smth, but nope!

I don't know much about voodoo myself, but if it is a closed religion (not saying it isn't btw, I just have absolutely no idea about it), at the very least be respectful of it and not demonize it.

I was also talking to a friend one time about the issues with how Viv portrays POC characters (especially Alastor), and they defended her with "Why does it matter if a demon is your race?" (She was white, talking to two POC folks 💀) and also "People have already ruined it and will continue to do so" like??? That should not matter lmao?

To any writers/creators/etc., just don't be ignorant, do research, and if you discover smth is funky in your story, change it and find or make a better alternative.

Exactly Anon! Like I myself a POC and to be honest, I literally thought Alastor is white until the Voodou thing. Viv is bad at art. Period. She's bad at character design, at writing, at colors. And she's the type to NOT get out of her comfort zone, leading her art to deteriorate.

Also, not surprising of Viv really. Searching about Vodou in Google only to add their symbols as spooky things to an edgy deviantart OC is par on the couse. Viv showd time and again that she only gives a fuck about something if it benefits her.

Im right now writing a novel, and the last point is important! The Internet is full of info, and as a user, you should use them on your creations indeed!

[shigarakisslutbag]

This isnt directly a request but if you do end up getting inspiration out of this then im glad! (wouldn't complain lol) Imagine how Shiggy would act if some villain with a big loving heart came in and just- somewhat adopted him. Shiggy gets injured? They're there soothing and scolding him. Ranting about video games or heroes? They're patiently listening. Makes my heart so happy negl.

Omg anon I actually really like this idea lol. I have no idea how I would write it as a fic or even organized headcanons BUT I will most certainly give you my disorganized thoughts on this because I have no self control.

APOLOGIES because I'm writing this at 1:33pm and I am very tired (but will likely not sleep until 3am.), THEREFORE, I probably have many typos because I didn't proof read an I am so sorry lol. Anyways, hope you enjoy my thoughts on this, feel free to add anything, I don't mind going back and forth on this topic (this goes for anyone btw! Not just anon. I love hearing everyone's thoughts on concepts I write for)

I feel like in this scenario of reader being a villain, reader's motives are either out of spite towards their hatred for capitalism or they're just kind of... goofy...and unhinged... in a bad way .. thatcopsandheroesdontlike YOU GET THE PICTURE OK? (Use your imagination bestie)

But regaRDLESS, you have a huge soft spot (and maybe some hard spots;) ) for shigaraki.

Which actually just ends up with you having a lot of compassion and care towards him. You can tell he's been through a lot. anyone can. and seeing him having clear struggles in his physical life and internal conflicts, you can't help but want to, well, help him.

I won't go into a huge back story because I simply... am tired LOL. But somewhere along the way shigaraki let you grace him with your presence.

So now you're here with your adopted introverted son and guiding him through his life full of terrorism, tyrants, and genocide ��� (you don't quite understand how he's both introverted and a menace to society at the same time. Shigaraki is what happens when an introvert just gets really fed up with capitalism ig)

BUT I DIGRESS

Shigaraki actually really appreciates you're presence. Will he admit it? FUCK NO LMAO. he'd rather twist his eyelids off and eat them before telling your annoying ass he appreciates you. But he does. Just trust me, he does.

Besides spinner, no one really listens to his rants about video games, players, the fall of society. Dabi refers to him as "a cartoon villain on heroin who monologues " shigaraki didn't like that very much

But you listen. You really listen. You ask him questions, you validate his feelings and concerns, you make sure he knows that he's making progress, ect. You don't just hear what he says, you listen. You engage. Which is something he's needed for a very long time.

Especially when he gets injured, is when he gets the most attention from you. Honestly sometimes he wants to hurt himself just hear you cry over him LOL. He's low-key obsessed with you but don't ever bring it up if you notice.

Like the one time he came back to the bar after the U.S.J incident, all bloody with bullets wounds, you were... not handling it well to say the least. Lol. Shigaraki was fine, just chilling on the floor cursing the hero bastards, as he calls them. But you were "dramatic" as shigaraki says. "I'll be fine I'll just stick some bread in bullet holes and cover them with plastic wrap"

???

????!!!!

SHIGARAKI YOU SUPID FUCK

You, much to his dismay, disinfected the wound with alcohol and with kurogiris help stitched up the wounds and wrapped them with a compression bandage and made him rest while checking in every so often to change out his gauze and bandages and cleaning the wounds again.

You also checked in quite a bit to make sure he was hydrated (with water because all the idiot drinks are energy drinks and alcohol)

Going back to listening to his interests, you both share some of the same interests so it helps a lot with your bond with the leader of the league. Even political views.

He listens to you too, even if he doesn't understand some of your interests or is very knowledgeable on certain topics you enjoy, he loves listening to you. He actually thinks your way of speaking and the way your voice sounds is very, very cute. But again, he'll never tell you. He's too embarrassed to and doesn't want to ruin,,,, whatever reputation he thinks he has.

[gemapples]

Rant away my friend

apparently a few people wanted me to vent about the kirby novels so head in hands ig i'm gonna go for it LMAO (this is inspired directly from @desultory-novice 's posts about it)

ALSO IM SORRY IF THIS IS SO DISORGANIZED gonna be honest i forgot a good half of what i wanted to talk about. But Anyways. please note that all of this is entirely My opinion you ofc dont need to agree and despite everything i actually really love and enjoy the kirby novels a lot !!

so okay after hearing her talk about the reason we're likely not getting a magolor epilogue novel and knowing takase's erm.... Infamous reputation regarding how she handles magolor's character that had me thinking a lot and. Wow i'm kind of Really nervous for how this magoland novel will turn out actually because a lot is kind of at stake here when you think about it

takase will either be forced to actually develop magolor's character, or she will just completely scrap everything that happened earlier, remove any mentions of the epilogue and go straight back to square 1 where magolor is -- once again -- the villain of the story. Don't get me wrong i like evil magolor a lot lol i think if done right it can be a very enjoyable portrayal of his character. but there's only So many times you can make a character the antagonist before it just gets straight up exhausting y'know

i think it's ESPECIALLY different in terms of magoland. This might be a cold take idk lmao but merry magoland isn't just some wacky little theme park magolor created out of the blue for no reason. It's something that signifies and sets in stone how he's a changed character. Merry magoland is magolor's dream he's had for a really long time by his own words and truly shows that all he's wanted to do is make people have fun and be happy. if you make him the antagonist in that, that completely just fucks up Everything relating to his character and renders that entire development null and also invalidates all the hardships he's gone through to make that happen

i do think takase's portrayal of magolor is fun! i do enjoy it and i do appreciate how he has a hard time communicating his desires and showing true friendship. i think that's important. one of magolor's most significant flaws is how he has a hard time understanding how friendship is supposed to work and what to do when you have friends. but maybe instead of making him the villain. Over and over and over again you could idk... have him Learn?? and actually Develop from his issues??? i know waddle dee is a completely separate character but for the sake of comparing to another person who has gone through a huge amount of development in the novels -- why can't magolor do the same? why is it constantly so insistent that he be the one causing all the problems for no reason other than haha it's funny (in most cases at least. i know dreamy gear was different and i will give it a giant shoutout for that)

i'm so sorry if i sound too harsh here i literally don't know how to word it otherwise lol i think it's important to emphasize that despite everything i do like seeing magolor's character in the novels. but it just gets to a point where it's Grating to me at times and depending on the scenario is just completely inaccurate. that's why i think magoland is such a huge point for us here with a lot on the line -- if she chooses to not make magolor the antagonist and make it accurate to the game's actions and desires, that will be an essential key for his development and showcase that we're actually making progress with his character. but if she chooses to make him the antagonist again, the potential for him being something more than a villain -- which is RIGHT there -- is completely wiped

afaik magolor and kirby's friendship was also mentioned and i just want to throw out there. merry magoland happened because of kirby. merry magoland happened because of magolor's friends. kirby, meta knight, dedede and bandee are the reason merry magoland exists. so if takase chooses to not acknowledge any mention of that and make magolor go against them all, that also erases the potential of magolor's relationship with other characters as well yknow... the characters he's gone against for this whole time? it also makes no sense whatsoever??

so yeah this is a bit long but there's just a lot to either look forward to or dread about this novel -- or even both lmao -- the more i thought about it. i want to have a decent amount of hope that i could be wrong here, maybe takase will take advantage of what she has to work with game wise and create something truly special. but throughout all of magolor's appearances in the novels... *hand on mirror* it seems like all of his character is constantly scrapped in favor of treating him like some apathetic irredeemable character with no regard for others or understanding friendship. so that's kind of a hard pill to swallow

[makigorogoro]

disorganized thoughts on fionna and cake eps 5 and 6

(Spoilers!!)

ok ive only seen the eps once each and im going off of memory so a lot of this is probably gonna be paraphrased and mixed up but whatever . also this post is really fucking long lol sorry

-OK FIRST OFF THESE WERE SO GOOD RAAAAAH

-obviously we are in the farmworld, not surprised but very happy!!!

-also not very surprised fionna and cake immediately went along with simon’s plan

-the whole time they were talking about where to find a crown i was like lol. simon don’t look behind you

-cake bringing fionna a dead rat was really funny

-the versucci gag or whatever was also really good

-but what made me die was fionna talking abt how she’s played a lot of post apocalyptic rpgs and then it pans over to “man who has actually lived through the apocalypse”

-was really cool to see how the farmworld has developed after what happened with ice finn, i think it’s interesting how they’re more technologically advanced since the first time an ice age happened in this world they pretty much reverted to medieval times (does that make sense. you know what i mean)

-i was SO convinced jay was farmworld finn’s little sibling so when he said dad my heart stopped

-the name jay didn’t immediately click until bonnie was revealed to be one of his other kid’s name and i was like HOLY SHIT PUHOY???

-veeeery interesting since assumingely golb destroyed/erased the pillow world

-i guess you could just chalk it up to finn would have named his kids the same thing in any universe?

-but i mean speaking of his kids GOD he got busy with huntress wizard

-i mean it has to be huntress wizard. one of them looks just like human hunter wizard

-sucks that she died though

-simon’s ship of theseus thing was so fucking funny oh my god he’s just like me fr (i started talking about the ship of theseus in one of my assignments a few days ago and i was like. is this too nerdy.)

-i haven’t really talked about farmworld finn yet. a little sad he turned out so cold (pun not intended oops 😭) because of what happened to him when he was younger

-good on him for saying simon was a damn fool or whatever for wanting to put the crown on lol

-i wish they actually had a talk though

-cake saying fionna should kiss him while knowing he’s just an alternate version of her??????? girl

-also farmworld jake still being alive was crazy

-so it did turn out the crown was destroyed in this world, i honestly wasn’t sure since the crown from the main world survived direct contact with a comet lol

-the romeo and juliet style romance going on between finn’s kid and big destiny’s kid was really good

-finn showing up with bartram lmao!!!!!

-dude i love bartram, the bit in finn the human where finn’s mom says that they have to sell the mule and then bartram’s head peaks out from the bed in the corner is unironically one of my favorite jokes in adventure time

-i kinda forgot what happens between here and the end

-so did farmworld finn fucking die????

-idk what happened there i sure hope not

-i really don’t know if we’re going to revisit these worlds in any capacity considering the amount of time left but i hope we do now!! i feel like we need to see what happens lmao

-now for ep 6

-wasn’t really expecting it to open on “fionna world” as they started calling it

-i was wondering how they were gonna balance gumball and marshall yaoi with what’s going on with the main trio

-they did it really well though i think

-i also wasn’t really expecting to be introduced to winter king right away once we got back to the main plot

-he definitely gave me weird vibes right from the start im gonna be honest lol

-blaah i don’t really remember what happens between that and the winter wonder world sequence

-so ill just talk about that. holy fuck

-every review i read before the show came out was really hyping this scene up and i get why now

-was really cool to see the beyond the grotto animation again and the song was so good it’s still stuck in my head

-but the moment the winter king said he overcame the crown with sheer will i was like. um. im calling bs

-i was just thinking however it did happen though i have a bad feeling about! felt really bad for simon and when he said that he sucked i was like. oh no ☹️ dude

-the moment i saw little ice marcy pretty much cemented it for me i was like oh no something fucked up is happening here. tbh i still can’t really figure out what happened with that but given what the winter king said about making an ice betty. uhhhhhhhhhh

-OH YEAH cake once again saying simon and the winter king should kiss . GIRL WHAT ARE YOU ON

-i looooved crazy pb

-i remember when people were saying she was a marcy pb child lmao.

-simon saying that he wanted to “fix her” while the winter king just wanted to kill her was really interesting. im trying to figure out what it means lol. like we know that simon wants to be the ice king again but also now knowing he would want to fix and save someone from that madness…idk

-her song was really good

-her playing those ominous notes on her keyboard made me laugh

-i haven’t really talked about gumball (im not calling him gary im sorry) and marshall. i thought they were really cute!!! could definitely see marcy and pb meeting in a similar way

-the juxtaposition between gumball talking about his creations to fionna fighting the fucked up versions of them was really cool

-i hope gumball doesn’t take what the lemoncarbs said to heart . they’re just like that

-ok so. I was honestly more shocked that fionna kissed (a version of) simon than him disintegrating seconds after lmaooooo

-i have to wonder why he immediately died here when in betty (the episode) he was dying relatively slowly without the crown’s magic

-ive been writing down a bunch of crack theories and the first thing ive gotten right was the winter king transferring his craziness to pb lol lets goooo

-i was thinking that simon might’ve transferred it himself but then i was like nooo he wouldn’t do that….apparently he would do that

-idk despite how he seemed i think the winter king was still a little insane in the membrane.

-maybe the crown was still influencing him in some way? and that’s the message here? idk

-i can’t believe bi fionna is real

-back to gumball and marshall. gumball describing slumber party panic……oh my jod 🥺🥺🥺

-the baby world was so cute

-“and i’ll be cursed the right way” simon do you fucking hear yourself

Ok that’s definitely not all i have to say but this post is long enough lmao ,, god this show is SO GOOD i can’t believe it’s real. ok that’s all

[sollucets]

ok so. so i made it out of midnight museum e3 alive but im gonna have to do something normal and calming for a while now because oh fuck me too many moths even like skipping scenes and cringing away from the screen. im unwell. many disorganized thoughts go here

so i Was right about dome frankly. i mean the hints were there (jib dialogue last episode + the long time no rent thing from e1) but for me it was that hes too stupid to be a full person (sorry baby i love u). like saying ‘is this normal’ about resurrection and lit. just going with whatever happens to him and running headlong into stupid situations. he literally Only just woke up. he has no brain head empty hes just doing the One thing hes been told hes good at and useful for. oh no baby :( they really keep putting him through it every episode LMAO.

got a Lot more worried khatha this episode plus a bunch more face touching. and sitting by his bedside. tor is So good with those shiny eyes of pain like … i dont know how he does that but its incredible. his face. his little tsundere look away / posture adjustment when dome woke up like you didnt literally die for this man recently. they are getting gayer each episode. again ive established i dont care about “bl status” it doesnt matter to me if they kiss but boy its just so…. they HAVE to know what theyre doing with this

i really like this show i Would Not have put myself through this for less agh. i still almost quit multiple times

that opening flashback scene with triphob’s grandfather was really good. by the way. i love immortals i love immortality. i love the moon (showing up just barely in blurry flashbacks)

bright did fucking Great this episode. im not too familiar with him, mostly from f4 thailand bits but he was so fucking creepy!!!!! tragic little murdery sadboy. what a mess. the whole house invasion scene was Sooooooooo. augh. freaky. everything he did was fucked up

i have some…. thoughts…. about the girl in this episode, rin, and her agency / lack thereof honestly. combined with the bride’s “men writing her story” thing….. its. hmmm. but i’m not sure i’m equipped to express that properly without rewatching and frankly i dont know if im capable of rewatching this episode

if i turn my lizard brain off also the vampire moths are a great horror concept and they were very aesthetically cool to someone who does not have. a lifelong fear of those fucking things

also yeah ‘cycle of death and rebirth’ confirms the reincarnation thing but i’m thinking that not only did khatha enounter past life dome / “that person” / “chan” but also like. present life pre-memories dome? and that’s why he was surprised when dome didnt remember him. it wouldnt make sense for him to be surprised a reincarnation didnt remember him. they definitely met pre-wipe

v fun to learn that june is immortal too??? but like. frankly im still so confused about her lmao. she was an immortal museum worker before this?? but she became the bride?? but they all forgot her past but she remembers being immortal and the artifacts? but she has bride magic now??? dont get me wrong i like her a lot shes great for wisdom and being the only one nice to dome but hoo boy

ok. theres all the bits in no particular order

so. yeah!!!! yeah i was so proud of myself for being mostly chill with the first two episodes of murder and body horror but uh i was NOT good with this. gods fuck why moths

[daemonhxckergrrl]

re: your ask from greyr4t about win10: as you said in your answer its free, just needs a key for 'activation.' ime activating win10 has been worth it. like you mentioned, it isnt strictly necessary, one can make do fine in a somewhat limited capacity with the watermark in the corner forever (unless your monitor is an OLED then have fun with 100% guaranteed screen burn in lmao. or unless always seeing it enrages you disproportionately. as in my case). but having windows activated is honestly just nice, it makes many things easier and is more sustainable in the long run... worth the extremely minor hassle as like a QoL thing imo. you also brought up that its possible to circumvent microsoft (and its brazenly insane asking prices 🤬) & buy cheap keys online from third parties. i wanted to talk about how i did shit, hopefully it helps the original asker directly or at least comes in handy to know

so i bought my (shady bootleg, yes, but perfectly functional for years now) win10 activation key for even cheaper than what Synthia listed as a price point- iirc, under 5 bucks USD. (might be higher now w inflation, but id be surprised if its much more than around 10.) if things still work how they used to, you can do this on ebay. technically ebays policies dont allow it, so the accounts selling these keys come and go frequently due to getting shut down by ebay after popping up. thus, dont necessarily be put off if the seller hasnt existed for long, as often thats just how it goes (or it did. hopefully this sort of thing is still going strong🤞); do trust happy reviews. now, there are a few TYPES of activation keys– priced slightly different, nothing big– that correspond to different editions of windows 10. so basically its home edition, pro edition, and "pro for workstations". might be worth finding a brief summary of each to determine which edition best meets your needs. (there are more editions beyond the main trio, look into those too if you want, but the tldr on em is theyre for like niche markets w/ highly specific use cases.) fwiw, i got pro & am happy with it. another thing, from personal experience: may or may not be obvious but you're gonna wanna save a screenshot of your key somewhere safe and accessible. additionally though, label the screenshot somehow so you know what it is later, and if youre a disorganized scatterbrain like i am then put that in multiple places you can reliably access so if/when youre having trouble tracking it down you know where else to look; it came in handy for me to have access to it in places both online (cloud storage like google drive or dropbox for example, or even just saving the email copy of the ebay mssg in the designated folder in your email for the ones containing info you wanna save) & off (physical note on paper, stored in the files on one or more personal devices, etc). theres a huge chance youll need it again in the future– like say if you want to upgrade certain hardware– and likely more than once. final advice: highly recommend looking into comprehensive ways of "defanging" and/or "lobotomizing" windows, as they say. i.e., a tip that gets circulated is doing the initial setup for windows w your pc in airplane mode / ethernet unplugged so you dont have to make a microsoft account so they cant create a profile on you to collect your data to sell off & target ads at you (which is obvi totally reversible later if you decide the benefits of having an account outweigh the drawbacks). shit like that, plus the loads of guides out there– many here on tumblr itself– on extensive fucking around in various settings to disable bloatware / preserve privacy / other useful stuff, that can get pretty granular. i think ive even seen Synthia herself reblog posts like that here a couple times, maybe? perhaps try checking relevant-seeming tags from the tagging system in her pinned, or do a blog search for the term 'windows' and see what all there is to find

phew, anyway, jesus christ! sorry this got to be such a long writeup!!! some of this blog's aggregate of resources have been a big help to me, so i wanted to try to pay it forward a little <3 and, Synthia, if you wouldnt mind, tagging the original asker in your response to this anon so that greyr4t is more likely to see all this would be very much appreciated by me!! ty in advance!! thanks also for your careful curation of useful info on this blog, plus the helpful posts and guides youve written here for us yourself 👍🌈

hi anon ! thanks for writing all this up !! lots of great points here - hopefully they help you out @greyr4t ! the airplane mode one is real important too if you care about privacy (and the fact you can't choose to make a local account during installation unless you are disconnected from the internet is awful and yet another dark pattern-type tactic.

i'm glad my blog's been good for you <3 (though i do need to go through and make all the important stuff a bit easier to access at some point)

iirc there's some reblogs on general privacy stuff (probably under one of the REPO tags and like "net privacy" or similar) as well as my own firefox post, and maybe more will happen in the future when i get to them

[elliebell77]

ok ive given this some thought and am going to dump said thoughts here. Sorry if it doesnt make sense lol

—

The first thing I thought when I saw this post was actually of Deltarune, or specifically Asgore’s house.

Now of course, you can make the argument that the state of his house can be blamed on the fact that he’s poor cause nobody’s buying his flowers and he keeps giving them away for free, PLUS he’s divorced which could have added to his financial struggles.

And I’m not refuting that. I’m not! I think a lot of this can be blamed on his financial troubles. HOWEVER, even poor, his room is still a mess. Disorganized, no sheet on the bed, random shit and flower supplies everywhere, the wedding flowers (im coming back to that later btw). Not to mention the color scheme itself. Looking at the juxtaposition between the actual shop and his room, the contrast is obvious enough that I don’t think i need to point out the difference in mood and colors, though I WILL point out the only real color in Asgore’s room is the flowers. And while this could be because the storefront has to look nice and professional, I think it also represents something about his character: The happy face he puts on for everyone (or at the very least, his kids) and the actual, dimmer mental state he’s in once you peel back the curtains.

There’s also the fact that, like in Undertale (which I’m getting to soon, I promise), Asgore’s life is one marred by loss. Rudy, for example, his best friend, is in the hospital and possibly dying. His wife left him and his kids rarely see him anymore. He doesn’t really have anyone to talk to, other than his flowers. To put it shortly, Asgore is incredibly, incredibly lonely.

I have a lot more to say about deltarune but I’m gonna loop back to it later + i havent played deltarune in a long time so there’s a lot i’ve probably missed/misremember

—

Now for Undertale. This is an interesting one, and I have a lot more material to work with because I remember more of that game lmao.

(thank you random reddit user for making these maps so i can rip it off google images to steal for my character analysis post)

Oof. Where do I start with UT Asgore.

I guess I can start with his loneliness. “Loneliness?? What loneliness??? He’s super friendly and regularly chats with citizens!!” I hear you yelling angrily at your monitor as you read this. Well, hypothetical audience member, shut the fuck up.

Ok but seriously, I thought about this a lot and while yes, Asgore is super friendly and outgoing, does he actually have any… friends? Like really good, really close friends. Sure, he has Undyne, but Undyne seems to be more of a child/student to him. Yes, he HAD Rudy, but as stated in the alarm clock dialogue, he passed away long before the events of Undertale. Gerson seems to have been a companion of sorts (war buddy?? Friend? Hard to say), but again, it’s implied they grew apart when Toriel left

Gerson dialog I was referring to ^

This means that, again, Asgore is alone. The only family he has left (that he knows of) locked herself in the ruins to get away from him and seemingly hates him, and while yes, Asgore does go out and talk to his subjects on the regular, he’s not necessarily close with any of them for one reason or another.

Which brings me to my big, fat point and the biggest reason I wrote this whole essay in the first place:

Asgore clings to the past (as a form of escapism?)

I mean, it’s painfully obvious in both games, but especially so in Undertale. I mean, just look at his house. The fact that it imitate’s Toriel’s, the fact that he tries so hard to imitate her butterscotch and snail pie, the fact that his kids’ beds are still both in their room, perfectly made, with their possessions still inside, untouched. Hell, he still has the nose nuzzle champs thing from 1998, which had to have taken place more than a decade ago now.

Toriel, on the other hand, has moved on. The kids’ bedroom only has one bed. The chair is well worn. Her room is messy, but lived in, with a journal detailing her life. Yes, she has a yellow flower, yes you can make the argument that she, too, clings a little bit to her old life, she’s very clearly moved on and dealt with her grief in a much, much healthier way than Asgore has.

Asgore’s house, in contrast, is just a cheap imitation of Toriel’s. A hollow shell, lacking the soul, the worn yet lived-in charm that makes Toriel’s so comfortable and welcoming. Asgore has not moved on, and maybe he never will.

We also see this in Deltarune (HA see I DID circle back to it), though not quite as obvious. Remember the wedding flowers? (you better, cause I specifically said I was coming back to them. bitch.) Not to mention the fact that he’s STILL trying to get Toriel back despite her obvious rejections (i mean, the poor woman’s thrown away so many bouquets of flowers that the trash smells like flowers 24/7)

This is shown, too, in the color language of both houses. I’ll put em here so u dont have to scroll all the way back up to see what i mean

The only real color in the room is the flowers. The only thing that lights up the house is the past. In a dark, lonely life, the only light to keep him going is the good ol’ days. The way it once was, when his wife was still with him and he still had 2 loving children. And he so desperately wants to get all that back that he’ll build and maintain an entire house that he doesn’t even seem to really live in, just to get a cheap imitation of what his old life was like

—

Is this evidence of PTSD? Well… no, not really, but it’s definitely evidence of depression, or at least some kind of psychological/trauma-related issue that he’s trying to escape.

For science. For those of you who have played/watched Undertale, do you believe Asgore may be depressed or have some level of PTSD? If so do you think this influenced his choices and actions?

[neonun-au]

thoughts on k r&b? favorite artists/producers? i trust your opinion…..

if you want something more specific then rank beenzino’s discography lol

wow this sent me down a rabbit hole lmao i used to dip my toes a LOT into k r&b but i fell out of it after a while cause the rappers that crossed over with it so often started to annoy me a lil bit when show me the money became like...a big thing LMAO so so many of my faves are old old

beenzino has a great discography. hes definitely up there as a fave. 24 26 girl live life like a fish...still top peak album so good.

i mean zion.t is a classic and he undeniably made so much good stuff, but primary was really where it was at for me. he seems to have sort of...disappeared, but his 2012 album??? unreal. SEETHRU?????

what happened to sonnet son? she was so interesting and its so hard to find her stuff now fdjksf ms. burgundy was my fucking jam the year it came out i was so into it

i kind of fell off of it around the time dean started gaining popularity but his first album i still love. 21 is a solid bop every time i listen to it

simon d. simon dominic. simon d o m i n i c oh oh. classic. he makes great stuff. cheerz still goes as hard as ever

suran is always a good listen. like no matter what she does, her voice just comes through so nicely.

gray had a hand in a lot of songs i really loved back in the day, and to this day still he's making some interesting stuff. blink was and still is a real fave (esp the remix)

giriboy has been making a lot of things lately that i very much enjoy as well, and he has been a staple for a while i think !

i also sort of miss kanto? he did some really fun collabs with some idols. his song with infinite's sunggyu was one i listened to a lot back in the day. i should catch up with his stuff

crush is good, but i never really got too much into his stuff. i loved his song 'sometimes' but i loved the cover by jamie park (ne jimin park) a lot more than the original tbh i was trying to find it but its so impossible fjhdaskjfd maybe ill have to upload it from my itunes

dynamic duo's 7th album (luckynumbers) is one that i really enjoyed. it was like...nice summertime r&b.

i used to listen to this guy called eachone a lot. he had an album in 2012 called diorama that i was really really in love with. especially the song i like...

this soulights album in particular

sexyhomme had some mixtapes that i loved that sort of straddled the line between r&b and hip hop a lot, but i always loved them. theyre difficult to find now, but he has some stuff up on spotify that is still very good ! (also 0 monthly listeners??? wth?)

do you remember that cover of officially missing you that geeks did? i dont know what happened to them but i still listen to that song. they did one with jo hyunah of urban zakapa too called just go and i really love that song

as far as the current k r&b scene goes, i think that bibi and bi (funny) are making some really interesting stuff ! btbt blew my fucking mind so im happy to see him doing some stuff. and bibi is hit or miss for me with her actual songs but i always think she's doing something interesting.

mino's last album is genuinely phenomenal. im so into it. i think he has been doing some really interesting things for a while now but that album was sort of the best of him all boiled down into one package. i loved kill and the title track tang ofc

sam kim put out a nice album in 2018 that i got to late but its a great time.

i would be remiss if i didnt mention feeldog !! ex-idol now doing a lot of production and his own solo stuff. and its all exceptionally good and very underrated. detox really is a favourite of mine this year, such a gem

the scene has changed so much from when i used to actively pay attention to it i dont even really know who is still in it beyond the k r&b that is so seeped into the fabric of kpop itself now. im glad so many idols are finding some purchase in the genre through solo careers and stuff, like genuinely i love yugyeoms r&b, and baekhyun and kai make some really solid stuff.

honestly it seems to me like the future of k r&b is a lot of idols / ex idols who genuinely grew up on and love the genre and are bringing their flavour and experience from the pop industry side of things to r&b and i think thats pretty cool. its always been rather interwoven, but you see more and more crossover now than ever before

[drbtinglecannon]

Ok so @bad-luck-qrow made this post about an exchange they had with their cousin, who Galaxy brained suggested a far better solution than what v7e12 did. I really wanted to expand and ramble off on it and all the ways this rewrite idea was better than what canon did, but I didn’t want to bog down their original post so here’s a new one!

Their cousin had suggested that instead of Clover dying in ep12, that Qrow was the one who Tyrian stabbed, but he survived. It would’ve avoided any character death and given Clover the chance to reconcile with the fact his partner almost died because he refused to disobey Ironwood’s orders for even a moment.

I love that! Avoids BYG, allows more development for Clover, avoids unnecessary character death angst, and frankly CRWBY wouldn’t have gotten nearly the amount of backlash it did over that ep. The only addition I’d make to this rewrite idea is that Qrow purposely threw himself in the way to save Clover, and the reasons for that is because it would have…

Followed Qrow’s canon tendency for self-sacrifice, and allowed this unhealthy habit to be later addressed and worked on like his alcoholism currently is. Frankly I’m surprised it hasn’t been mentioned at all thus far in canon (that I can think of anyway), because it’s come up in a few fights I can think of off the top of my head where it incapacitated him at least briefly when he did this, the most notable one being in his first fight with Tyrian. So addresses a bad habit and comes full circle.

Shown Qrow AND Clover both following the theme song’s message of ‘trusting love’. The theme songs are supposed to be super relevant to the volume right, but I can’t think of a single case of someone trusting love over duty or orders or what have you in the volume ending, except Penny who was like…already mostly on their team anyway? Winter went against her own sister, the Ace Ops fought the kids, Ironwood turned against Oz and almost killed Oscar to do so, and Clover decided orders to arrest Qrow were more important than dealing with the serial killer who works for Salem (Which were already orders he was following. Why do new ones cancel out the old one?). If the fight ended with this rewrite idea it would’ve followed that theme, but especially it would’ve portrayed Qrow and Clover following that theme, two chars who arguably should do so the most. Qrow with his history of being betrayed and fear of getting close and self-hatred from his semblance, and Clover the professional military man who keeps everyone including his own team at arms length and expressed (in a throwaway line) that he trusted James with his life. The growing relationship between these two despite the long laundry list of reasons they could’ve hated each other was a reoccurring subplot in this volume, and it should’ve had some kind of fucking pay out. Imagine if Clover saying “I wanted to trust you too” was the last verbal exchange they had before Qrow threw himself in the way of the attack? That despite their disagreement and the bs of that situation Qrow trusted in love, and then with Clover having to rush to get him help and reevaluate that if he just listened to his heart Qrow wouldn’t have gotten hurt in the first place.

Been adequate angst without BYG! Imagine! Getting angst without a graphic death of a queercoded char!

Been far more interesting than killing Clover ever was. People are more attached to Qrow, unlike Clover he’s been around for a while, has been given the chance to grow, and is directly related to the protags. He has a lot more involvement and at stake with the plot so people would’ve been more invested in him getting better than with Clover doing so. We just met Clover, give us more time to get to know him and fall in love; what better way than to have him save a char everyone already loves!

Allowed some great symbolism with their semblances (that somehow ended up being a completely wasted opportunity the entire volume). The unlucky one survived again, the lucky one survived only because of the unlucky one’s involvement and not by his own luck, Clover cursing his luck he let Qrow get hurt, etc. It’d also maybe get some more use of Clover’s pin (that got its own focus in the opening) and how Clover can more or less control good fortune whereas Qrow can’t control misfortune, like idk he flicks it calling for help even though they’re out of range but help answers and shows up soon enough it can save Qrow.

Allowed Clover more character development!!! What’s the point of introducing new chars and killing them before we can really get attached? Drama? Get out of here. Personally, watching an already beaten down broken man that was trying to recover and finally made a friend scream out in agony against the bi flag sunrise was not at all enjoyable!! However, watching the Mr. Perfect new guy panic while his meticulously crafted military persona crumbles as he does everything he can to save his new friend (lover) and ignore orders he knew were bad all the while? That I’d be interested in, provided it had the payout of everyone living which in this scenario it does. It’d expand so much more on the many hints that Clover was more than a blindly loyal bootlicker too. Plus from a writing standpoint, watching someone panic as they go against all odds to save their loved ones and the visceral relief when they succeed will always be infinitely more interesting and worthwhile to watch than violently killing chars off for the dramatics imo. (BYG trope or not it’s just not good writing!)

Caused the tension between Qrow and Tyrian to reach new heights in a satisfying way. (@theonceoverthinker wrote a post on this that I was specifically thinking of writing this bullet point.) Like, from Tyrian’s POV in this rewrite he tried to get revenge and STILL failed, this bitch survived a stab from him twice! TWICE! For a serial killer with a personal beef with this guy that’s gotta drive him insane! There’d be great potential for an all-hell-breaks-loose fight now. Instead the way Tyrian said his final words before running off in ep12, it gave the impression he knew Qrow was just gonna rot away in guilt and anguish, that he won, he got his revenge and that’s the end of that conflict, that the combined efforts of 3 seasoned Huntsmen/Huntresses was wasted. I know it probably won’t go that way and Tyrian will probably die by Qrow or Ruby’s hand, but watching that scene it felt like both Tyrian and Qrow accepted that Tyrian won and it was over. Idk maybe that’s just me.

Would’ve expanded upon Qrow and Clover’s relationship, which was am important subplot this volume, in a way that’s like, feasible to fix. I love the Staff of Creation theory, but honestly the trauma and broken trust those two are gonna have to work through feels overwhelming as hell, and that’s ignoring how long the feelings of guilt and bitterness are gonna be festering before Clover gets res’d (if it even happens). Instead, if Clover saved Qrow after Qrow saved him, yeah there would still be that conflict to work through (and Qrow’s self-sacrificing I mentioned earlier), but neither one died, they both immediately showed great care for the other by their actions in that situation, and would’ve been able to apologize and start mending their relationship pretty much instantly from there. Plus, it’d be so easy to finally drive home their dynamic was in fact romantic in this situation, something a lot of fans (homophobes) kept arguing against despite all the flirting, and winking, and call back to canon het flirting volumes ago, and complimenting semblances/colors, and parallels to bumbleby and a few to nuts and dolts too. Think of the romantic tropes this could’ve done, the tenderness the dialogue the reunion scene!! Wasted!!

Ok I think I’m done and y'all get the point. I’m not gonna say OP’s cousin was the first to suggest this rewrite idea, but when I read it I started frantically thinking of all the ways it would’ve easily fixed the shitstorm that ep12 ended up being.

[taeghi]

thank u so much for 4000 followers guys !! :”)

i’m so thankful that people enjoy my writing. thank u to everyone that has reached out to me to compliment my work, or even just commented on the post! i see every comment and it really makes my day. even seeing people reblog my work makes me super happy.

im sorry i haven’t been posting as much recently and that im super disorganized with my scheduled posting times. my last year in uni is kicking my ass lmao. i have a lot of writing planned and i hope to be able to finish them soon and post them for others to enjoy.

overall, im so happy with how my blog has turned out and i want to thank everyone again for following me and liking my work. i hope to continue writing for this blog for a long time, even if i am very disorganized haha.

again, thank u all so much and i’m so glad you enjoy my work! 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

[neko-rogers]

But It’s Better If You Do

Trying to keep your relationship with your professor was easy enough, until you learned that someone had found out about it.

words: 7,424 tags: manipulative!peter, explicit noncon/dubcon elements, degredation, implied overstimulation, blackmailing, kidnapping, college student and professor relationship, 

a/n: whew this had a lot of words compared to what i usually write. plus, since im bad at titles, i’ll just use my fav song titles lmao. (ps. erik lehnsherr aka magneto is here and im just glad i could put him in my little fictional world bc im d biggest slut for him)

     A complete lie, you just did not want to deal with college fuck boys.

     The man in front of the class was practically pouring his heart out into the lecture. The chalkboard was filled with white letterings from left to right, not knowing where to start as you take down notes.

     “It is important to keep in mind that bimolecular structure and function are dictated by the properties of the medium in which they are dissolved,” your professor explains while continually pacing from one end to the other among the students seated at the first row.

     You decided to seat around the middle to the last row, knowing it was the least obvious way for other students in the class to notice how much you fawn over your Organic Chemistry professor rather than the subject itself.

     Honestly you could listen to him talk for hours. All those information he had been discussing would not actually process through your thoughts. You knew that better than anyone.

     But who honestly would invalidate your reason? Everyone can probably relate to hating Chemistry, no matter what subcategory it is. 

     Considering that this was probably one of the most difficult courses you had in your program. You were just thankful and lucky enough you landed on one of the hottest professors amongst the campus.

     “Hey what did Professor Lehnsherr say about the problems during synthesis of proteins?” Peter asks.

     In spite of being fortunate about everything else about this subject, you were not quite happy about Peter Parker following you around like a lost puppy. Especially during the classes you both have alike. 

     The boy constantly asks so much questions as if you were the teacher already. In addition, he seemed smart enough to figure things out yet somehow he keeps on bugging you for reassurance.

     You did not want to be rude. He has not done anything to completely deserve your rage, however he was definitely getting on your nerves.

     Honestly you would not want to be infuriated over his consistent queries, but you were just as distracted as he was, maybe even more. With this, you were looking dumber to him each day. 

     To anyones pride, it was probably a kick in the stomach. You knew you were not the brightest in this class, but it was best to leave the information to yourself. No need for anyone to point out how mindless you were.

     And you really were not. You had other Science subjects you totally excel at. Sadly, Chemistry was just not one of them.

     “Well, uh, I don’t think I got that part either.” You look aside where he was seated and awkwardly smiled at him before mentioning an apology, “Sorry, Peter.”

     In return, Peter smiled at you and dismissed the question. You were not so sure whether to forget about it or take even the least bit of offense. You felt a little mocked by how easily he did it and innocently he smiled, but maybe you were just overthinking this through.

     “It’s fine,” he tells. “I just didn’t get the third bullet, but I’ll try to review it in the textbook when I get home.”

     “Oh okay, sure.”

     “Speaking about reviewing,” Again, Peter tries to start another discourse.

     “I was wondering if you got reviewers for the upcoming text for next week? We all know how difficult Professor Lehnsherr’s exams can get, right?” He lets out a forced chuckle, assuming it could lighten the mood.

     As much as he tried to make small talks with you, almost everyday, today you really feel like you did not want to return the favor. Especially after having to bring up the test next week.

     “I don’t really make reviewers, I usually just scan the books I have at home.”

     Lies. You probably have a box full of index cards and sticky notes in your room.

     You tried to use every studying tips every corner of the Internet could give. All those study-life hacks that really did not help much but pile up to your disorganized state of mind.

     You fucking tried to study Chemistry. You really did.

     “What, you don’t?!” He suddenly exclaims, not realizing the loudness of his voice as it almost caught the attention from people at front. “You seem to be busy all the time though. It’s like I always catch your writing or reading something in class.”

     Maybe your mood was just off but it definitely seemed weird for him to say that. Though, you did not want to make something from what he said. It was not worth your time.

     “I guess people are not always what they seem to be, yeah?”

     Again, Peter gives out that soft chuckle and smile, “Then I guess so. You do make a point.”

      He does not argue with you any further.

     “Can I at least borrow your Physics book? I only bought Chemistry and Biotech for the semester. Didn’t know they would actually utilize it for once,” he scoffs. 

     At first you hesitated. You were reviewing for it too, but you already felt bad for being no help whenever he asks a question and often times disregarding him when your mood if off. Plus, you did just make it look like you were not much of a study-freak.

     “Okay.”

     He instinctively fist pumps the air and looks at you with a wide, grateful grin. “Thank you so much. You’re a lifesaver, Y/N.”

     “Don’t mention it.” You grab the book he needs from your bag and hands it to him. He accepts it and places it inside his while also clearing the rest of his things.

     Looking at his digital wristwatch wherein he raised his index finger up as if he figured something out of it, he says, “He’s going to dismiss the class in a few minutes. We should get ready for Cell Biology next period.

     Oh how you hated it. Were you jumping to conclusions? Or was this boy really trying to be too close with you? Or was he just being nice and informing you to prepare ahead?

     God, you did not give Peter Parker the right to cloud up your thoughts like this.

     “Thanks,” you say, “but I need to talk to Professor Lehnsherr after class. Have to, uh, consult him about my concept paper that he made us submit last week.”

     As he tidies his notebooks up and carelessly shoves it inside his backpack, he immediately looks back at you with a confused expression, “Oh, I can always wait for you–”

     “It’s fine, Peter. Thank you though.” Two of your hands were instinctively waving in front of you, a meek gesture for him to stop coddling you or whatever move he had been trying to make at you.

     “Are you sure? I–”

     And if you were ought to be saved further from lashing out over Peter’s incessant attempts, you finally heard the words any student was longing to hear. “Class dismissed. I’ll see you all on Monday.” 

     “Eri–err, Professor Lensherr just dismissed the class. Better catch up to him before he heads out,” you hurriedly said. And with a loud slam from your notebook, you quickly shut him out. In addition, you practically shoved every thing in front of you into your bag without sparing a second glance.

     One strap of your back was slung over your shoulder as you hurriedly flew down the aisle. Professor Lehnsherr was midway into packing his things before you interrupted and approached him.

     “Professor,” you call out. “I have a question. About the paper I handed in last week.”

     “Uhuh.” He faintly furrows his eyebrows, trying to hide his already obvious bewilderment. “I forgot which assignment was that, Ms. Y/L/N.”

     There were students still exiting in class. So you tried your best to make your conversation with him less suspicious. He was most likely doing the same. 

     “It was about the Chemistry-proposal thing.” You snapped your fingers a few times as you gathered your train of thought, but realizing it was not going effectively. “Well I just wanted to confirm it since, you know, I was hoping for any feedback from you throughout this week.”

     “I’m not sure if I have read it. I’ve certainly been busy this week,” he clarifies. “Nonetheless, we can talk about it later. Thank you for bringing it up. I’ll make sure to follow it up in my schedule, Ms. Y/N.”

     Both of you made your way out the door once there were only a minuscule amount of students left in class. You probably had been looking at your professor with gushing stares, but you doubt the other people in the room could notice it. They were farther away from where both of you stood, much less would they be able to hear what the two of your were talking about.

     “Oh thank you so much, sir!” You almost cried out and jumped in joy while reaching through the threshold. Moreover, you composed yourself before mumbling out, “I’ll see you later, Eric.” 

     In which you were certain no one would have heard it besides him.

.・゜-: ✧ :-　　-: ✧ :-゜・．

     “I’m sure you’ll get a good grade in the exams, Y/N,” Eric leans back to his seat with a humble smile upon his face. 

     “Really? I doubt so, there’s a kid in your class that keeps bugging me out to a study date, or whatever you call it,” you sneer. You lick your lips as you finish taking a sip around the wine glass, setting it down and looking back at the man you were having dinner with. “It’s getting very annoying though, he surely knows how to get on my nerves.”

     “I’m sure he’s just trying to flirt with you, like any other college boys do.” He optimistically and maturely lays out the options. “It’s pretty normal for anyone to chase someone they are fond of, especially for young adults like you.”

     It was a pretty obvious sign that he was trying to let his message reach you. 

     “Well, I apologize for my standards of men,” you say. “I just want to skip the whole heartbreak in college and character development. All that stuff you usually see in a typical teen romance movie.”

     You sigh, looking down and saying, “I already found a man for me. Why would I stoop down for some guy who’s most likely wanting something from me, and dumping me once he got what he wanted.”

     “Y/N, I don’t blame you for liking men that’s ten years older than you,” Eric assures. “But I want you to realize that you still have a lot to look forward after graduating

     “And I look forward for you too!” You tried to not raise your voice, though having dinner in his house wouldn’t really catch anyones attention. “I can’t wait to finally graduate from second semester and be able to spend more time, publicly, with you.”

     “Yes, I understand, honey.” He places his hand over yours as he tries to calm you down. “Like I said, I just want you to make sure that you’ve clearly thought this through.”

      Eric adds, “There’s plenty of men out there. I don’t want to take away your opportunity of experiencing something new at such a young age.”

     “I’m turning twenty-four! I promise you I’m thinking everything through.” Your voice was much weaker than a few seconds ago. The evident tone of strength fades even with one glance from the man in front of you. You felt yourself shrink in your seat. But you were sure he does not intend to frighten you into compliance.

     “Sorry,” you pout. “Didn’t mean to raise my voice.”

     “I understand, and I won’t pressure you any more tonight, okay?” He tries to uplift your mood, detecting quickly the shift of the room’s atmosphere. “You deserve a good dinner tonight, like I promised, sweetie.”

     His smile made you calmer. It was then that you realized why you were attracted to a man like him even if he was still your teacher.

     The way he handles you in any given situation so sensibly. Though it may feels intimidating at first, he consequently tries to override the tone of the conversation which cheers you up.

     With one hand, he hold yours and gently draws it towards him at the same moment he leans his head down. Eric presses a kiss against the back of your hand and you butterflies immediately fill inside your stomach. “I love you.”

     “I love you too.” Every doubt you had entirely disappeared now. If there were hints of you hesitating to continue seeing Eric, they were certainly long gone now.

     “Let me drive you home after dinner,” he offers, like the gentleman he is.

     Eric always does make sure you get home safe. However, you both agreed that he drops you off at least a block away from your house. Just in case people around your neighborhood might catch you, or worse your parents.

     It was not like you were ashamed of your relationship with Eric. Cautious was the term.

     You were only a few months in seeing him. Fair enough, he was your second semester professor and the both of you met before that period.

     You were not only risking the wrath of your parents once they hear you’re dating an older man, let alone your Chemistry teacher. But you were also putting him at risk if ever his faculty finds out.

     Eventually, the two of you pack up and end your conversation. Other than talking about college, the two of you also talk more about yourselves which has progressed you into learning more about each other’s personalities and likes.

     He helps you out of his house and into the passenger seat of his car. It had been more than thrice wherein he drove you home, and the familiar scent of leather and the typical Glad air fresheners has clung onto your nose. You strap on your seatbelt on just as he was getting inside the driver’s side.

     The ride was not entirely dead silent. Eric made a few more small talks before finally turning a right which was where he usually drops you off. It amazes you how instantly he remembered the way to your home, as you instructed him the first time.

     “Thank you for tonight, like always, Eric.” 

     As always, you made your way out of his car prior to giving him a kiss. You only had to walk straight ahead, glancing at your home which had one dim light illuminating through one window.

     Upon entering the house, you figured your parents were already asleep and a hint of the living room lamp was present. Taking the benefit of not having to be interrogated by anyone, you rushed upstairs to your bedroom, turned on the lights, and immediately closed the door behind you with a sigh of relief. A smile was also visible after recalling your night with Eric.

     As you made your way towards your bed, a piece of paper lays obvious in the middle of it. Your sheets were flattened and tidied, so you could obviously detect when something is placed on top of it. You have no memory of leaving it early in the morning before you left too.

     When picking the paper up, you realized it was a piece of polaroid film. Its back was facing you, having no idea what to expect at the front.

     At that point, the smile from your face turned into horror and all the color in you basically drained away.

     The picture displayed you and Eric at one dinner night out from a few days ago, you still remember. It could have been anything but malicious, but the way his hand was intertwined with yours as both of you laugh away without worries. It was clear as day, the light shining perfectly at the both of you. Anyone can conclude what was happening in the picture.

     You did not know this day would come. The picture was taken from Eric’s home to prevent such things like this from happening. So it puzzled you just as much at it terrified you.

     This was definitely someone who had been stalking either one of you. It was not a mere instance like paparazzis who catch celebrities dating on the streets of New York.

     Someone definitely have been observing the two of you.

.・゜-: ✧ :-　　-: ✧ :-゜・．

     Days have passed, a week almost. Examinations are scheduled for tomorrow. 

     And you prayed that the picture you received would be the only thing terrorizing your dreams. But you were completely wrong.

     From thereon, you started to receive more pictures, specifically one every morning and night, from your past hangouts with Eric. It were simple shots but had the power to completely jeopardize either one of you, mostly him at stake though.

     It was obvious that the person behind this was definitely observing the two of you for a while. Probably even during the most earliest weeks when your relationship with him started.

     Though it may seem unfair, you did not mention anything about it to Eric. It was enough the he was keeping with you, his job, and himself private – which clearly was not working out so well. You felt like it was your responsibility to handle this situation. You were so sure you did not try to publicize anything and kept it on the low.

      Nevertheless, it was out there. Eric had not mentioned anything so you assumed he did not receive a picture like you did.

     Currently, you were seated at the farthest row at the back of the room, somewhat near the corner. Physics was your last subject and you could not wait but finally leave.

     In addition, you texted Eric that you would not be seeing him until after the exams. It was an easy excuse not to see him, saying that you wanted to focus on studying for it; however, you knew that you would just be busy thinking about the creepy stalker gallery you have been receiving.

     “Hey.” Unsurprisingly, a familiar voice whispers next to you which disrupts your heavy train of thoughts. “You finished studying for tomorrow? I’m about to end my review with Chemistry later.”

     “Cool.” Probably the one of the most basic replies in the universe. “I haven’t finished studying, I’m kind of dealing with a lot of things recently.”

     You made sure to generalize your answer, but enough for him to sympathize and at least give you some space.

     “Oh, sorry to hear about that.” Peter frowns. He takes his seat a few desks away from your left, leaving you to continue thinking. You were thankful for his gesture too.

     Surprisingly enough the boy barely bothered you for the entire lecture. You were still engrossed on finding out whoever was stalking you, even so dating back to boys you evidently rejected during the first semester – who badmouthed you immediately afterwards. There were not a lot of names, so it was easy to remember who was who.

     You traced back to each boy and remembered what they said after you told them you were not ready to enter a relationship – a complete lie, you just did not want to deal with college fuck boys.

     Just as you expected from any of them, rumors have spread out about you which was mostly shaming you physically or mentally. Some were milder insults than the other yet at the end of the day you did not care.

     “Fuck,” you whisper to yourself. “Who was that boy at Liz’s party.”

     Your eyes were sealed shut, recalling a list of names while using your thumb and middle finger to massage your temples. It was getting frustrating and mentally exhausting.

     After some time, you had so much word filling in and our of your brain that you were not aware that your own name was being called. Your heart practically skipped a beat after hearing it the first time, assuming that you were being called to recite an answer. But you became content after seeing that it was just Peter, who started tapping your arm to get your attention.

     “Huh?” You lightly shake your head before turning your head aside.

     “Oh, class was dismissed a few minutes earlier than usual–”

     “Don’t forget to answer the assignment regarding thermodynamic concepts found it the book. You’ll hand it in immediately on Wednesday.” The professor addresses the class as they were already carrying their bags and themselves out the room.

     You start placing your stationeries inside yours, packing your other things up until it was only a pair of earphones and your phone left in front. Peter stood near the aisle while looking at you just as you were zipping your bag shut.

     “Oh shoot, I’m so sorry, Y/N,” he states out of nowhere causing you to furrow your eyebrows at him. “I forgot I still haven’t returned your Physics book I borrowed last week.”

     Nodding your head and standing up, you shrug it off. “It’s fine. You can return it tomorrow.”

     “Sure, but how will you do your Physics assignment?”

     Oh yeah. Your professor literally reminded the class a few seconds ago.

     “I think I might be able to do it overnight. How many pages is the task?”

     “Eight, or nine I think.” He frowns looking very guilty at you.

     “Shit,” you swore. That was a lot of pages than the usual assignments given.

     “Yeah, professor said it could help add points if you somehow get a bad grade at the tests.”

     “Never mind,” you tried to set his mistake aside. “I’ll try to do it within overnight tomorrow. I can ask for help from my friend tomorrow morning and–”

     “Wait! I realized you can stop by my apartment to get it.”

     “Oh–er, Peter, I don’t think I have time to–

     “It’s just nearby the campus, I promise,” he assures and adds, “it wouldn’t be a hassle, it’s probably on your way home anyway so it won’t make a difference.”

     “Uhm.” You were doubtful of him. 

     However, you did realize that you did not have anything to do after class. You were keeping distance with Eric for the meantime which meant that your schedule was mostly vacant after this.

     “Please,” he begs, “I feel so bad for keeping it the whole week. I swear it’s like a few blocks from here.”

     “Would it take more than twenty minutes?” You purse your lips, convincing yourself that you would rather force yourself to study at home than spend it at someone’s apartment.

     “I only take around ten minutes to walk so,” he answers. “Unless you’re a slow walker, of course.” The tone of his voice seeming to be joking.

     Again, he pleads. This kid will not fucking budge.

     “Fine,” you blurt out. Though, you realized your sudden-almost lash out moment at the boy that you made sure to reiterate it but slower, “I mean, sure. I can stop by your apartment to pick up my book.”

     An awaited smile and sense of agreement washes over you.

     Peter then leads the way as you walked behind him, maintaining a short distance so people would not throw out any suspicious looks. Like in every college, everyone knows just how fast gossips formulate and rumors spread.

     If you think about it though, it might avert anyone’s suspicion – mainly pertaining to your creepy stalker – with you and your Professor. But you were not prepared for that yet, maybe some time when you can finally think about its consequences through.

     True to his word, as the both of you exited the campus, it took a short time before the boy in front of you told that you were about to enter through the entrance to the building of his apartment. You were not so sure if it was really a momentary walk or because you were so focused on thinking and keeping a distance.

     At some points he did often look back in case you got lost from following him. Plus, like always, he asked you simple questions either about your day or your subjects to make small talk. In which case, you were barely answering him but definitely progressed compared to when he attempted for previous times during class.

     In addition, as the two of you walked down the block, the number of faces you could only assume was in college decreased. Meaning that the glares at you eased up.

     “Well, here’s my location.” A loud huff follows as he uses a key to unlock the door for the entrance to the building, “It wasn’t that far, was it?”

     “Yeah, I guess it wasn’t that far.” You agree as he holds the door for you and then walks right after you.

     As Peter leads you upstairs onto around the fourth level, he proceeds to walk along the corridors. The array of same beige colored doors with small golden indents of unit numbers paraded along it too. Eventually he stops and inserts a key into the lock, twisting it until hearing the unlocking sound.

     For a moment you hesitated to follow him. You just wanted your book and you were sure he can give it to you on a shorter span than your walk from campus to here. Was it that troublesome?

     Entering his complex, you discovered how minimalistic it looked. To be fair it seemed quite small, the living room instantly greeting you through the entrance and a kitchenette at the side. But since his things were tidied up, it looked roomy.

     You instinctively close the door behind you, slightly aware that it did not create a locking sound. Following Peter, you took a few more steps until you stood still at the passageway between his living room and entryway.

     “Do you want a drink?” Peter asks.

     “No thank you.” You were still trying to subtle. “I just want my Physics book, Peter. Please?”

     He looked at you and paused for a split second. You could feel the frown behind the expressionless look. “Yeah. Okay. Sure,” he nods for a few times before turning around and proceeding to a seemingly narrow hallway. “I’ll get it in my room. Be back in a second.”

     Your feet faintly paced back and forth, still where you stood a few meters between the entrance and living room. After a few more minutes, Peter emerges carrying the familiar book with one hand.

     He approaches you within a few stops but stops in his tracks, leaving a distance from you. “Well uh,” he starts as his chin was tucked.

     “I just want to tell you something before I hand you back your book.” He looks up at you with really pleading eyes. During other instances in university, you were definitely familiar with that look. However, this one probably ranked as one of the most downhearted ones. 

     You did not want to feel regretful for him. Though it definitely feels like you just kicked a puppy.

     “Was is it?”

     “I love you,” he blurts out as his face goes back from hiding and looking down.

     It seemed awkward. You were somewhat expecting it, but you were also hoping that this day would not come – or not at least until you graduate and leave the university.

     “Oh.” You honestly did not want to react.

     Were you going to say sorry? How about thank you? Would it be better if you said you did not like him back? Or will the best response be that you are already taken?

     “Peter, I–”

     “Are you really dating Eric?” He shots up with eyes appearing almost teary.

     What. The. Fuck.

     “No,” you mutter. It was not much of an answer to his question. It was more on being quite horrified as your mind started jumping to conclusions.

     The amount of things running around your mind right now was immeasurable.

     Firstly, anyone could make two and two out of what he said, especially knowing that no one knows it even so around your circle of friends.

     Secondly, you should have thought better. Your doubts with Peter should have been grater and you totally underestimated him. However, some part of you prayed that he was just an annoyingly awkward nerd who follows his friends regarding flirting tips.

     Lastly, you turned around and ran.

     You probably got your way with opening the door and taking two steps out. It was not long before you felt arms wrap around your waist and either side of your arms. You were then lifted and pulled behind while you tried to kick at the air as an escape. Did not work though.

     Peter was surprisingly stronger than you thought. He already seemed fairly muscular at class, hiding behind those long sleeved sweaters and flannels.

     Eventually the last thing you remember was the image of the door of his apartment open while you get sucked into the room further. Everything went black afterwards.

.・゜-: ✧ :-　　-: ✧ :-゜・．

     When you felt that you were slowly restoring to consciousness, you were aware of the pounding at the back of your head and your arms.

     You tried to move your hands, wanting to press against the parts of your body that were aching. But you felt incapacitated as your wriggled your wrists around and felt an unfamiliar sticky fluid enveloping around them.

     “Glad you’re awake,” a voice says. “Does your head hurt?”

     You tried to open your eyes, the dark lighting of the room not cooperating with your vision. A light from the window and a lamp were the only things that helped you form something out of the void. 

     From there you saw Peter Parker sitting closely beside you at the edge of the bed.

     Hell please let this be a nightmare.

     “What–” You groan, “What do you want from me.”

     Your mind was building up your anger yet your body says otherwise. You felt exhausted and heavy.

     Peter shushed you in a caring manner, “We’ll talk when you feel better. I’ll let you get more rest okay, sweetie?”

     “Uhh.”

     That was what you could remember the most. If you have awoken for other times in between your sleep, then you surely did not have an idea of it.

     When you finally woke up, the level of your grogginess felt little to none already. You looked around and saw that the room was still dark and seemingly still nighttime.

     As your head was twisting from side to side, you saw Peter appear from the doorway carrying a translucent cup filled with water in one hand. “Hey, you’re finally awake.”

     Instead of replying to him, your wrists writhe beneath the fluid that you are still not familiar of. You could not really look up to get a good view of what it was, but it was wet, sticky, and felt like super glue.

     On the other hand, both your legs, ankles, and feet were free. The back of your thighs bounced against the bed as you struggled, but it would not do much since your arms were practically stuck.

     “Fuck,” you grumble.

     “That won’t help. You’re pretty much stuck there,” he says, Then he takes a seat at the edge of the bed, alike where you remembered him positioned from earlier, “Might as well talk to me until I let you go.”

     “Okay then, when will you let me go?” Your voice was calm hoping you could talk your way out of this mess. 

     “If you behave for me like a good girl, okay?”

     Shivers went up your spine as you cringed at his statement.

     Immediately, your mood shifts from calm to furious after hearing his disturbing bargain. Then purposely rolling your eyes for him to see. “How the hell will I behave if you’re a creepy stalker! You disgust me!”

     Peter hums, displaying a look wherein he seems like he was thinking. You were not sure if it was sarcastic or not, either way it annoyed the hell out of you. “Creepy stalker sounds overstated, it was more on being curious.”

     You scoff as well as exclaim, “You sent me photographs of me and Eric at his house! Fucking hell, Peter.”

     “Oh yeah that part.” He slyly pouts his lips to the side as he comes to realize what he had done, “I guess it was a bit creepy–”      “What do you mean a bit? That was invasion of privacy!”

     Despite being trapped, both your hands balled into a fist, feeling very furious at his dense answers. “I was living my own life! I kept my relationships to myself,” you cry out.

     “Yes, but you weren’t completely living your life,” he whispers while gently combing his hair through the front of your hair. “You deserve much more than someone who couldn’t proudly tell that you’re his girl. Is he even a man? Do you really enjoy that kind of life, sweetie?”

     “We were happy,” you weep. The evident crack on your voice was a signal that you were about to cry though you were not sure if it was because you were held hostage or because you were worried for Eric.

     No one would understand your situation with him right now. Especially Peter.

     “Trust me you weren’t,” he scoffs. “You deserve so much more, and I can give you that.”

     “I’d rather be alone forever than be with you, asshole!” Your voice was inconsistent, clearly affected by how fast Peter’s mood also shifts quickly.

     You also figured you were not looking entirely fresh while crumbling beneath him. Drops of tears and sweat were all over your face and neck, both your eyelids felt swollen, and your nose was almost stuffed.

     Peter stand from the edge of the bed and advances to his desk from the side. A harsh bang echoed throughout the room as your body twitched out of shock.

     “What does that dick have that I don’t?!” He grits his teeth as the curves of his jaw intensifies. A displeased look was written all over his face. 

     “P-please let me go.”

     “I need you to answer, sweetie. We going nowhere unless you answer!” He was never going to let you go if you were not going to cooperate. 

     Every step he takes closer back to the bed just increases your heart beat further. He had rolled the sleeves of his sweater up to the edge of his elbows and you felt threatened looking at how firm his arms looked.

     “Peter, p-please,” you hiccup.

     As Peter returns to the edge of the bed, he does not hesitate anymore to keep a distance. His hands hover to either sides over your body and sets the left side of his head on your midriff, laying while also getting a good view of your vulnerable state.

     He does not even look life he was struggling to make an effort to keep you down, but you could feel how heavy he was and was barely giving you a chance to move around.

     “I can give you so much more, Y/N.” The way his gaze directs at you was definitely one of the creepiest things you have experienced. He had so much emotions yet completely lacked sympathy for your state of mind.

     Shutting your eyes, you only cried further. You felt a hand cup one of your cheeks as its thumb wipes away the pouring tears. Like a broken record, you only pleaded more, “Please let me go.”

     “I can’t.”

     “Why.” You bawled, realizing he has no plans of releasing you anytime soon despite it. “I won’t tell anyone about this, I p-promise.”

     “I know that,” he says, “but you’re going to run back to Eric, probably tell him too, right?”

     You did not want to answer, merely shaking your head as you resisted a cry from your lips. It was somewhat what you had planned, but now you were just scared shitless.

     “You won’t tell anyone but him cause no one knows about it other than you two, right?” He corners your words. 

     “Eric would lose his job if someone, especially your parents find out, right?” Hell he was correct. He most likely had been stalking you for so long to find out about it.

“You love him so much, you wouldn’t want to hinde

     It was terrifying that someone had been learning about you and your life for a while without your awareness.

     “Please stop. What do you want... money?” you whimper. 

     Peter did not seem likes normal college boy; he does not think like one, too, for sure. Anyone with a right mind would not do something like what he did. No one would have the guts to do so.

     “I just want you, Y/N. I want to give you what you deserve,” Peter answers as he sits up and leans his face closer to yours. His mouth leaves a small gap from your right ear as he whispers, “Let me make you feel good.”

     “No–”

     He cuts off your plea with a proposition, “If you let me, I might consider letting you free.”

     “You want that, right? Want me to let you go...” His hand combs through the other side of your face, “just let me show you that I can do way better than him.”

     Every ounce of your blood was trying not to give in. You were smart, you ought to find a way out of this. However, you realized that it will not be enough. You already struggled so much from the super glue around your wrists and you could not imagine how much more would it take now that Peter was on top of you.

     Eventually you stopped struggling and let him be. There was no way out of this than to let him do what he pleases.

     You feel his lips press against your ear first and then progresses over your cheek. His grip around your arms loosen after detecting that you stopped struggling beneath him. You could feel him smile on your skin, “That’s it, relax for me. Good girl.”

     His hand reaches to undo your pants as his lips drifted on yours to force their way on making out with you. Another hand then presses under your jaw and throat. “P-Peter,” you choke, feeling lightheaded after being unable to breath properly though your mouth until the grip had loosen.

     “Sorry, babe.”

     He soon descends from your face to your neck and collar region. You were so sure he was leaving marks on you as you felt him suck and nibble against your  skin. Like a controlling asshole he was, you expect to see bruises on your skin by tomorrow.

     Despite having your hands fastened, he still moves your shirt upwards past your head. It halts and hands loosely around your arms as you emerge topless beneath the boy.

     “Fucking beautiful,” Peter compliments your body under his breath.

     Although he seemed to have time on his hands, he does not leave a second wasted. He also goes to haul your pants past your legs and ankles. The growing look of impatience on his face says it all.

     Peter moves from your side and welcomes himself between your legs. He spreads them out to have enough space for his body and you could not feel more embarrassed than this.

     You grit your teeth over each other as you felt him press fingers against your cunt. Instinctively, you clench around nothing as he continues to play with your entrance, making sure you get entirely soaked under his touch.

     “You know you shouldn’t hold back. I know you’re loving it so far, your body says otherwise,” he teases before laying on his stomach and moving his head closer to your pussy.

     Without a warning, he licks a strip of you making the back of your thighs quake lightly. Peter senses your reaction and continues to do so, using his tongue to play around and poke inside of you until you were slowly giving in without even realizing it.

     Just as you thought you were getting used to his actions, he then inserts fingers inside you, feeling your warmth around it as he pushes it in and out.

     “Oh,” you moan.

     He continues, making sure he also does not leave your bud of nerves behind. The tip of his fingers and tongue alternate on playing against it, making you throw back your head out of pleasure.

     “I bet he doesn’t please you like this,” he scoffs.

     Eventually, at your vulnerable state, you could already feel yourself closing to an orgasm. Your toes curled as your temples throbbed, sealing your eyes shut as you accepted on giving in.

     You bit onto your lower lip, trying to resist a moan. Somewhere inside you, you were still trying to fight back and not let Peter have the satisfaction he had been craving.

     “You’re being so tight... Just let it out.” He coaxes and you hate how you did what he told you so.

     The extensive grin on his face seemed priceless. He pulled back and you were aware that you seemed exhausted beneath him. You assumed he was done with whatever he wanted to do with you.

     But when he started to take off his sweater and unbutton his pants, you realized it was far from over.

     As he presents himself just as naked in front of you, he again welcomes himself between your legs. This time you get a better view of him and his muscles and abs. He gets a good view of your body too for sure as his hand reaches to start stroking his dick.

     He places one hand on your thigh and pushes it farther to give him more room. Finally, he inserts in inside you and you automatically felt him throbbing between.

     There was a growing heat between the both of you, and it only intensified as Peter started to thrust his hips forward and backwards. There was not even a rhythm from him as he moves harder after hearing you softly moan underneath.

     The slapping sound echoes through the room that would eventually reek of sex and you felt ashamed that your body was enjoying all of this.

     “Ah… ah… ahh… agh….”

     “You’re starting to enjoy this, aren’t you?” He brags as one hand was reaching for your breasts while the other holds your thigh up. “Fucking slut.”

     Your body and mind were tired and could only hold so much longer. It was not a surprise when your stomach started to churn your the muscles in your thighs were cramping up.

     Peter did no help after seeing you starting to wear out. He tried leaning in to make out with you and expect to moan into his mouth. You did for a moment, a combination of both your drools were streaming down from the corner of your mouth.

     “We’re making a mess, huh,” he mumbles. “But I know you’re already a dirty fucking girl.”

     He proceeds to deprave you with statements, “Can’t believe you’re enjoying my cock better than that old man’s... Such a fucking whore.”

     You twist your head aside, trying to hide the fact that you feel like your temperature were burning up. You were so sure he could feel the increasing warmth of your walls either way.

     Your eyes were rolling back as you resist arching your back, which was not really a success as the amount of pleasure was overwhelming.

     As you writhe beneath him, you felt a hand on your cheek. It pushes your head back onto looking at front and at Peter. “I want you t look at me when you’re going to cum, sweetie,” he orders and you could not do much anyways.

     The second time you came was a whole other level. You never felt this with any person you slept with so far, rather not this fast and intense to say. “That’s it, fuck, you’re tighter than I could ever imagine.”

     Peter continues until it was his time to cum. The bed continues to move along with his pace and your body was basically abused to his liking.

     And even if you were not aware of it, the boy was practically thankful that his agency decided to agree to soundproofing his whole apartment – his motive being for personal reasons, which they did not question any time soon.

     You were helpless, you knew that. All you had in mind now was rest. Your eyelids were heavy and your mind was drifting to slumber.

     The last thing you remember was Peter moving over your body to come all around your chest like a painter with its paint brush creating a masterpiece from your chest to your core.

     “I love you.”

a/n: ily pls leave comments <3

[nebylitsa]

would love to hear about your oc's :'(

sorry for taking SO long to answer this but THANK YOU for asking about my ocs!!! <3

i have way too many to keep track of tbh but right now the group im focusing on the most is les albatros, a collective of writers, artists, actors, & other creative types who are all regulars at le café albatros. i still cant really decide when & where their stories are set—it kind of all simultaneously takes place in the 1960s and the 1890s, either in paris or in the fictional city of kaiserstadt (which is itself the capital of a fictional country somewhere in central europe).

just like the setting is a mess, who actually makes up this group of ocs isnt super well defined either. i keep getting new ideas for characters, merging some together & making new ones, & changing their traits & backstories, so its kind of hard to make a neat list of them. but here are the main/most well-developed ones:

camille jacobson - the eccentric owner of the café (which, by the way, is named after a poem by charles baudelaire about how hard it is to be a poet)

franz wolf - a composer; mad, bad, & dangerous to know

friedrich weiss - an actor who’s haunted by his nazi past (in the 1960s version of the story)

leo freud - a writer who would immediately be cancelled on twitter if they lived in the modern day; friedrich’s wife; heavily based on me lmao

frieda weiss - friedrich’s twin sister with whom he has an incestuous relationship (its consensual! they love each other! but he IS married...); aspiring tradwife

pierre rudolf - a filmmaker & the manager of the théâtre bogatyr, which he rules with an iron fist; has the artistic style of wes anderson & the ethics of werner herzog

dr. brandenburg - pierre's long-suffering psychiatrist

isidro de azarola - a depressed artist with a lot of catholic guilt

louise oscar - a critic; isidro’s manic pixie dream girl who writes mean reviews of his art

pretty much all of them are bi for maximum romantic drama purposes, and many are trans/nb.

so thats them! that is, as much as its possible to coherently describe this as yet very disorganized mess. i want to write a series of short stories about all of them eventually, mostly standalone but not entirely; so far the only ones ive written anything about are friedrich, frieda, & leo.

[daisylore-au]

yoooo i have so much brainrot for this entire au but especially for the twins Helga and James. idk they're just really interesting to me probably cuz of my TFTSMP hyperfixation- and bring up a lot of questions. I noticed you named them after characters that both appeared in TFTSMP at some point which was a cool detail!! so if its alright im gonna ask a lot of questions about them probably sdfghgfd. One thing i wondered is if their parents know they can time travel or no, or even just karl knows? and if they'd ever possibly come across each other and be like 'hey wait a minute you shouldn't be here.' also i think you mentioned one of them has more controlled time travel abilities than the other and i was wondering how they're different? and like karl would either of them have memory problems or other side effects? sorry for the long and disorganized ask hgfdfghj (also anon isnt on and idk if that was on purpose or not)

I LOVE THE TWINS SO MUCH !!!! tales from the smp is such a cool series and i take so much inspiration from it for my own projects and writing, so i had to include nods to it :D

(and yes of course :D the more questions the better bc i’m hyperfixated on this au rn and this helps LMAO)

under cut for length !!

who knows about the kids’ time travel? very few people: including their parents. sapnap was worried about the kids being able to time travel, but since they haven’t shown any overt signs of being able to do so, the three of them have just sort of come to the agreement of “we’ll cross that bridge if we get to it” - as far as they’re concerned, they’re sure a) they haven’t inherited it, and b) if they have, it won’t manifest properly until they’re older. 

karl does suspect - he’s always been worried about the imaginative stories the twins would tell when asked what they had been doing all day, and always tried to keep an overprotective eye on them (he doesn’t want the in-between OR other side meddling in his kids’ lives - he’s done his part, and as far as he sees it, his kids shouldn’t have to go through what he did). he’s not convinced helga’s ramble about roman emperors being really mean and sentencing her to death for kicking them IS a story: but whenever he asks either of them about it, they always wriggle out of it.

the server takes the lives of its occupants Very Seriously — karl had to time travel to preserve stories and stop the egg from occurring (at least in this au, that’s what i’ve decided happens LMAO), and now his kids are time travelling because the server knows they can fix things.

(has karl come across them in his travels and just forgotten? maybe. only time will tell !! )

how do the twins have different levels of abilities? it’s partly just random chance, and partly due to personality. helga has a lot more control over her time travelling because she’s a generally more confident person, while james, who is more timid/nervous, is a little jumpy when it comes to time travelling, which reflects in the control he has over it. the less you fear your ability, the easier it is to control (kinda like frozen lmao!!).

do they experience side effects of time travelling like karl? neither of their memories are properly failing yet, though they’re both pretty scatterbrained, which is partly because of the time travelling. it’s hard to remember where you left your coat when literally ten minutes ago you’d been running from dinosaurs, LMAO. 

i hope that answered your questions !!! feel free to send another ask if it didn’t sbdkskd

ALSO tysm for letting me know about anon :’) it’s on now !!! anon asks have been enabled :D

[catcze]

YAY my fav koko main is back! how are you doing today?

genshin is literally testing my patience rn because of yae. like… i just want her so i could stare at her with heart eyes all day; she’s so pretty bdjcndjk. but since ayato and jade cutter are coming, i gotta skip her </3. why do am i attracted to pretty 2d men and swords /lh.

earlier i was thinking of kokomi and went, “she’s so pretty.” imo she has the best design in the game; i mean, look at her?,$:!&,&;& (and maybe also because her vas are pretty too send help bsjcjdj.) i was thinking of pulling her too but i’ll just wait until her third rerun </3.

speaking of which, can you give me tips on how to use + build her? when i used her as a trial character in the potion event, i was struggling lmao. —vera

Vera darling omg im sooo sorry this is late–– I literally fell asleep just a bit before u sent this and i was busy most of the day aaAA <//3

But !! I'm super duper glad to see you tho :DD And good luck on ur ayato and jade summons!! I hope you manage to get them asapppp

As for the Kokomi tips, sure!! I'd love to give you a couple <3 This is a little long, and I'm doing these off the top of my head so it might be a bit disorganized, but I hope it helps! (this is long I’m sO sorry)

Okok, so there are mainly 2 ways to play Kokomi: Either you play her supportively for her skill, which is her jellyfish, or you play her as a DPS. Personally, I go DPS Kokomi, but that's because mine is high invested and crowned atp ajksdnsa

Building her is, like, super easy lmao. an hp/hp/healing bonus set is one of the basic and most universal Kokomi sets, no matter what playstyle you're going for, and you don't need to worry about substats much at all. Going for ER or flat hp in the subs is pretty good, but you don't need to stress over it too much.

Viable Kokomi sets are maiden beloved, ocean hued clam, tenacity of the millelith, (and for DPS purposes) heart of depth.

Since it’s not uncommon to have Kokomi as the lone hydro character, she needs a lot of ER, depending on your weapon + how often she stays on the field. A good baseline would be 180 ER to get your burst on cooldown, and just adjust n test to see what suits you. 

If you play her fully as a support, you're either going to be using her jellyfish as a hydro applicator in freeze/electrocharge teams, and you'll be using her burst only to refresh the duration of her jellyfish. She isn't as useful in vaporize teams though, since her hydro application can't keep up with characters like Xiangling and Hu Tao, so she's not as popular in those.This is the one where you build her hp/hp/healing bonus. As a support, tenacity is one of her really good sets, since she can use both the additional hp, and her jellyfish is able to proc the 4pcs effect, which adds to the team's overall damage. maiden and clam are also good options, though and feel free to mix and match 2pc sets across the three sets if you need. Viable weapons for support Kokomi are Thrilling Tales (good for buffing the entire team's DPS) prototype amber for the heals, or even sacrificial fragments, if you're not used to popping her burst to refresh her jellyfish duration, and you need a cooldown to ensure full uptime on her hydro application.

Playing support Kokomi is super easy lmao–– basically just pop into the field, cast your skill, then before its 12 second duration is up, you switch to her, cast her burst to refresh the duration of the jellyfish, then swap back out. This ensures that your skill will be off cooldown by the time the refreshed jellyfish expires for good, and you'll be able to keep 100% uptime on your heals and hydro application!

Another way to use Kokomi’s skill is in the sukokomon team. It’s a bit complex, but it does surprisingly high damage and even with low investment, so it’s worth checking out. 

Now, DPS Kokomi is my personal favorite and what i currently have (sort of.) This is the one where you obvi deal damage with her in her burst, often using Kokomi's normal attacks to proc reactions. One of her best (and honestly most fun and satisfying) team comps is a taser comp, (I fondly call my taser team Electrofish) It’s basically Kokomi with Raiden/Beidou/Fischl/Kazuha/Sucrose to make the most of rapid fire electrocharged reactions, with viridescent shreds from the anemo characters. Here, the viable sets are 4pcs clam (for that spicy phys dmg every few seconds) or 4pcs HoD. Mainstats you want are hp/hydro/ healing bonus, with ER and flat hp/hp% and some attack%. As for weapons, moonglow is definitely her best, though prototype amber and even the hakushin ring are viable. 

In an electrocharge team, the rotations might vary depending on who you use, but the general pattern is kokomi E – Electro offield supports (raiden E, fischl E, beidou Q) – anemo chara’s skills/burst for the vv shred – Kokomi’s Q. Now, when you normal attack with Kokomi, it’s not very recommended to use her charged attack, since it takes up time and stamina. It’s generally best to normal attack twice, then dash cancel her animation, then rinse and repeat. 

Personally, I run a dps/hybrid Kokomi, since I mainly use her in co-op (and because the clam domain hates me and hasn’t given me a decent hydro dmg artifact smh) and I’ve built her on hp/hp/healing, with Everlasting Moonglow so she heals a really good amount while also doing damage while in her burst + capitalizing on the damage from the clam’s bubble. 

ajshdbasj that’s all i can think up rn–– i hope it helped a bit vera!! I’m sorry if it’s a bit of an info overload, love ^^ Good luck on ur pulls!! <3 SMOOCH <33

[bubmyg]

Your writing is so fluffy and heartwarming. I don't know how you're with requests but if you ever have time, maybe you can tell how pillow talk with yoongi would be? Maybe after a nap or something and being super fluffy but in deep conversation with each other. Thank you so much for everything!!!

pairing: yoongi x reader

warnings/genre: so much fluff i suggest you consult a dentist beforehand lmao

word count: 1,196

a/n: this request is so old im sorry to whoever sent it ajfkdl i got in a Mood today can u tell after reading this

“You know what would be nice?”

You startled, not quite like you would have without the leftover sleep dragging on the underside of your eyelids every time you blinked blearily at the far wall, but a tense in your stature that caused your eyes to pry a bit wider nonetheless. Yoongi noticed too, having subconsciously shuffled closer to each other in your slumber until his stature was slotted neatly to the pull of your legs upward toward your chest. The fond laughter that rumbled quietly in his chest was enough to calm the thrum of your own. 

“I didn’t know you were awake,” You commented as explanation for your reaction. 

His fingers brushed under the blanket, finding your hip then the hand that rested over your stomach, pressing crooked fingertips to the empty spaces between your own. His words landed on the back of your neck, lips snug to your skin, “I can tell.”

You came to Yoongi’s silent coaxing, rolling to face the sleepy assessment of his half lidded irises quiet under the dark lighting in the bedroom only accompanied by the afternoon sun that split through the blinds. One corner of his mouth lifted, hand leaving your grasp to stroke the side of his thumb across your cheekbone. 

His eyes shifted from the movement of his finger to your gaze. “You were napping pretty hard there, my love.”

“You fell asleep before me,” You accused, features scrunching up in faux annoyance. 

His lips subsequently soothed the wrinkled skin, the place between your eyebrows, the wilted petals of your lips, the tip of your nose, quiet laughter following in wake of his affections. “Anyway,” His thumb pointedly plucked your bottom lip from it’s pouting position, “You never answered my question.”

You exhaled through your nose, propping your cheek up between your hand and the pillow, “What would be nice, Yoongi?”

You were awake now, even aside from the gentle touches and lax way in which Yoongi’s voice never quite lifted above a rumbling murmur, yet you still startled when something much higher pitched clawed outward from the back of his throat as he rolled to his back, dramatically flopping one arm outward on the empty space on the far side of the mattress. 

“—to never leave this bed—” He turned his head to look at you, squishing his cheek upward against his wide eyes, “—ever.” 

“I don’t know, I think you might get hungry occasionally,” Fondness replaced any trace of annoyance you’d previously fronted, “Also I’d miss you. A little bit.”

His free hand flopped around at the wrist, searching for you, and you aided in settling yourself into his grasp so he could squeeze you against his side. Messy tendrils tuck haphazardly in blinking eyelashes from his jerking movements when you propped yourself up on his chest by your elbows and you subconsciously let the tips of your fingers brush the black away. 

“I’d only leave to come see you,” Yoongi said earnestly and even if he was teasing the less than percent chance that his life could take on the shape of living under his plush collection of monotone duvets like a contented kitten, you felt your body warm considerably. “Or better yet, you just stay here with me.”

“Hmm, I don’t know,” You had access to his cheek from your new position so your lips took the opportunity, “I suppose you’re cute enough.”

“Remember the first time you stayed over?”

The abruptness of the question allowed your quiet mind to transport to a time when the walls surrounding you weren’t the normal, when you weren’t a resident of the apartment that now held your half of a closet and your keys on the kitchen counter and your favorite painting in the hallway beyond the houseplant you’d raised from a sapling. The warmth quietly spreading it’s way to the tips of your toes became fuzzy, outward now to every inch of your being rather than simply trying to infuse into every vein and you had to settled yourself onto his shoulder. 

Whether that was to hide your shy smile or not you’d rather not say. 

“Yeah,” Your nose brushed against the collar of Yoongi’s shirt, “I don’t even have a bachelor pad comment. You’re a better cook and designer than I am.” A beat and then you rambled, “Maybe that’s the standard we should start upholding for bachelor pads...no more empty beer cans and limited toilet paper, I want specialty, self assembled light fixtures and—”

You vaguely heard the bird chattering outside the window, alerting the routine part of your conscious that the time was somewhere between three twenty-seven and four twelve, the time a small cluster of finches gathered without fail on the bird feeder you’d found Yoongi hanging after work one day. Time didn’t particularly matter, nor did yellow and brown finches or the cluster of unopened emails thrust into your inbox while your eyes were closed, not when Yoongi’s crooked finger was underneath your chin and his lips were sweet between the seam of your mouth. 

The sheets had long since tangled around your waist, caught somewhere underneath your knee and uprooted to the curl of Yoongi’s spine when you sank backward into the pillows as he hovered above you. There were no implications to kissing him like this, routine like the shells of seeds shed by the finches now sprinkled in a perfectly disorganized pattern in overgrown grass. 

Something was a bit different though, the adoration now seeping into every fiber of your being now forced to the pores in your skin until it created a thin aura on the outside of your person, effectively maybe you just a bubble of unadulterated endearment for the man humming against your lips. 

Your eyes didn’t open immediately when Yoongi’s mouth busied to your cheek instead, then left your skin entirely. Yet, the pause couldn’t have properly prevented your heart from overflowing into the spaces between your rib cage when your found a similar fondness coating the upturn of his lips and the shine in blinking eyes. 

“I hope we get to do this for a while,” He told you, voice laced in something you could only describe as your heart racing upward from your ribs to roar in your ears. 

“The bed thing again? I told you—”

Another chaste kiss, one that earned a gasp from your lips and your hand clutching onto the sleeve of his shirt. 

“No,” Yoongi said firmly, “This. Us.”

“Being with you,” His eyebrows furrowed in the middle when your mouth parted to apologize, lifting a little bit higher to settle his lips against your forehead, leaving them there as he affirmed, “I want to be with you, like this, for a while.”

It was partially a joke, one you teased quietly when his sparkling eyes settled to yours once more and your hand shifted from his sleeve to the front of his shirt.

“Forever?”

Yoongi laughed, genuine and loud and a paired with crinkles framing his eyes and gums on full display as leaned to press his forehead to yours. 

“Yeah, angel,” He turned to brush his nose against yours, “We can start with forever.”