#this is obscenely long and i am sorry i just have a lot of feelings

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Stress Relief

Summary: After a recent promotion, Javi has had a lot on his plate. Thankfully, you know just what to do to help him de-stress.

Word Count: 2.8K

Pairing: Husband!Javier Peña x Wife!Reader (no use of y/n, post season 3)

Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v sex (make safe choices pls), oral (m receiving), creampie, size kink (ish?), praise kink, sex as stress relief, Subby, whimpering Javi because giving him a surprise blowjob when you know he's stressed would make him crumble, this is literally porn without a plot WHOOPS

A/N: Shoutout to my job for having a system wide data outage today so I didn't have to work and got to write this instead 🤪 Poor bby cow eyes deserves all the stress relief in the world, and who am I to deny him 🤷🏼‍♀️ Also proud of myself because this is the first thing I've written without an obscene breeding kink in God knows how long, gold stars for me LMAO

Can be read as a standalone or as a part of the Never Too Late Series!

“You’re still working?” 

“No, I just really like sitting here and going through all this fucking paperwork for fun.” Javi sighed, sarcasm oozing out of his words as he leaned back in his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. 

As thankful as Javi was for his much more structured, low risk job at the Laredo Sheriff's Department compared to his time back in Colombia, his recent promotion had put way more on his plate than he had expected. 

Begrudgingly, Javi had been bringing work home with him most nights to make up for what he couldn’t finish in the office, leaving him in an exceptionally sour mood that he was spending his nights finishing paperwork instead of spending time with you. 

“Sorry, I’m not trying to be an asshole, Querida.” Javi huffed, upset with himself that any ounce of him was resorting to taking his frustrations out on you. “I just- I’ve just been really stressed about trying to get all this shit done.” 

“Really? I can’t tell. You don’t seem stressed at all.” You quietly teased, your sarcasm enough to at least crack a small smile out of his pouted frown. 

Pushing the office door open, you softly padded into the room, placing yourself behind Javi’s desk chair and draping your arms around his shoulders, gently resting your chin on his shoulder. His hands reached up to wrap around your arms now resting against his chest, his thumbs rubbing soft circles onto your skin as he let out a heavy sigh, your presence flooding him with at least a little bit of calm amongst the chaos.

“Is there anything I can help you with?” You asked, pecking a soft kiss onto the scratchy stubble of his cheek. 

“No, it’s just some paperwork shit.” 

“You sure?” 

“No, thank you though, Hermosa. I promise I’ll be done soon, baby.” 

Javi assumed his reply and gentle pat to your arm still wrapped around him would have enough to send you back out of his office so he could finish the rest of his work, but as your lips began to slowly travel from his cheek to down his neck and back up to nibble at his ear while your hands slid down his chest, he slowly realized that your offer to help had nothing to do with the actual work he needed to finish. 

“You sure there’s nothing? It sure seems like you could use some stress relief, Javi.” The tone of your voice shifting from sweet and innocent to low and sultry, the whisper of your words dancing in Javi’s ear and fingertips raking lower across his stomach and thighs making his breath hitch in the back of his throat as he realized what kind of “help” you were planning to offer him.

You smirked as you watched the bulge in his slacks begin to stiffen, your hand just grazing along the seam of his crotch while you kissed his neck, sucking at his pulse point and nipping at his skin. You could practically feel Javi melting into his chair at your touch, hoping that your plan would provide your husband with some much needed stress relief. 

“Pobrecito (Poor thing). You’re so tense. And so hard,” You laughed quietly to yourself, hand now cupping the full blown erection in his pants, “You gonna let me help you, baby? Help you get rid of some of this stress?” 

You began to swivel his desk chair to face you, Javi’s lips already parted for his heavy breaths as his hungry gaze met yours. Slowly, you climbed into his lap, your legs straddling over his hips as your hands ran up and down his chest, toying with the buttons of his dress shirt to expose his soft and tanned skin. 

Your mouths met in a hungry clash of tongues and teeth, capturing Javi’s muffled moans as you kissed him with an electric intensity that already had him needily bucking his hips up into you, desperate to ease how painfully hard he was from the few short moments since your proposition. 

Javi could barely find it in his mind to string together a coherent sentence, frantically nodding his head in agreement to your question between sloppy kisses, letting his hands roam down your back until they were grabbing your ass, kneading the plump flesh in his grasp. 

“Use your words, Javi. You want me to take care of you?” You cooed, grinding your hips into his lap as you watched his head tip back against the chair, jaw going slack and mind running blank as you rubbed against the straining fabric of his pants. 

“Fuck. P-Please, baby.” He moaned, Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat as he gulped, trying to use any ounce of composure he could to somehow make words travel from his brain to his mouth. 

“Good boy.” You smirked, placing one last kiss on his lips before climbing off his lap to settle yourself between his legs on the floor, letting your fingers toy with the clasp of his belt buckle until it broke free.

“Fuck me.” Javi whispered to himself under his breath, watching you free his belt to carefully unzip his slacks, lifting his hips just enough to help you pull down his boxers to reveal his aching cock, tip already red and precum weeping from his slit. 

“Maybe if you behave and let me take care of you, then yes.” You teased before letting your kisses trail up his thighs, inching closer and closer to his length, only making him groan more. His hand ran through the dark locks of his thick brown hair, trying to center himself enough to keep from busting right then and there. 

Your hands ran up and down his thighs as you scooted closer to him, kisses trailing behind the gentle graze of your fingertips up towards his length. You couldn’t help but smirk at him with a devilish grin, seeing how needy and worked up he already was without you even touching him yet. 

Letting your lips inch closer and closer to the base of his cock, your hand wrapped carefully around him, your thumb swiping over his tip and collecting the precum that had been leaking from it, sending a shiver down his spine and a low groan in his chest.

Slowly, your kisses made their way up his length, your lips replacing your hand, tenderly licking at sucking at his tip, eliciting a low groan from deep within his chest. “Relax, Javi. Let me take care of you, okay?” You cooed, letting his cock tap against your tongue before licking a long strip from base to tip, the sensation making him shutter. 

“O-kay. Fuck- Yeah, okay, baby.” He managed to stammer out, looking down at you perched between his legs, beginning to sink your mouth down on his length, hollowing out your cheeks until you could feel him hitting the back of your throat, coming back off him with a pop and a satisfied smile, batting your lashes at him. 

Javi’s head hit the back of his chair as you began to repeat the motion, slowly taking the full length of his cock in and out of your mouth, letting his tip graze the back of your throat with each movement.

Letting your tongue drag up his shaft, your lips wrapped around his tip, sucking and flicking at his most sensitive spots. One hand was wrapped around his cock and working in tandem with your mouth, while the other grasped at his bare thigh, fingertips digging into his skin. 

You began to pick up your pace, shifting your hand to cup his balls so you could take him back into your throat, sinking down just enough to let the deep, musky scent of the curls at the base of his shaft tickle your nostrils. 

You couldn’t help but let a small smirk form between your lips as you worked at his cock, seeing and hearing just how wrecked Javi was from the short time that you had gone down on him, quiet whimpers and moans escaping from his lips, followed by muffled whispers of mixed expletives in Spanish and English to himself in any attempt to keep from spilling down your throat just as soon as you had started. 

“Jesus fucking Christ… F-fuck me. You feel- mierda- you feel so good, Hermosa.” Javi managed to stammer out between gasps, looking down at you nestled between his legs with a desperate expression painted across his face, already feeling his balls beginning to tense and stomach start to swirl. 

While you knew it wouldn’t take much more to get Javi to your intended point of stress relief, you selfishly couldn’t deny the fact that you were now also in need of your own relief, feeling the arousal that had been pooling in your underwear, coating the inside of your thighs and forcing you to squeeze them together in attempts to ease your growing ache. 

Pulling off Javi’s cock and planting a soft kiss to his tip, you peered up at him with a devilish grin, phrasing your next proposition as a question, even though you undoubtedly already knew what his answer would be. 

“You wanna cum down my throat, or cum inside me? You choose, handsome.” You cooed, fingertips grazing the inside of his thighs as your kisses trailed behind, teasing Javi to the point you were half convinced he might cum just like this, considering his half coherent babbles as he tried to string together words to form any sort of thought. 

“I-inside. Fuck- Let me cum inside you, please.” He stammered, nodding his head frantically in confirmation of what you already knew would be his answer. 

Gripping your hands around his thighs to push yourself up to stand, you reached down to tug the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head, quickly followed by your bra, both now crumpled in a pile on the floor. 

You couldn’t help but let out a little giggle at how Javi was gawking at you and your now bare chest, eyes bulging out of his skull and jaw hitting the floor as if he was a goddamn cartoon and it was the first time he had seen you topless in his entire life. 

Your bottom half slowly followed the same fate as your top, pants and underwear shuffling down your hips and legs until they were pooled around your ankles, leaving you completely naked as you began to crawl back into Javi’s lap. 

You let your legs straddle over his hips, your cunt ghosting over his cock as you placed your hands on his stomach, letting them slide up his chest until they were buried in the thick locks of his dark hair, gripping and tugging his curls while your mouth engulfed his in an electric kiss. 

A soft moan rumbled in your chest as his firm grasp found a home on your hips, his fingers digging into the meat of your stomach, holding on for dear life while he felt you hovering over his length. 

“Please, Hermosa. I need to feel you, baby.” He whispered into your ear, now all but begging for you to sink down onto his cock and let himself get lost in the mesmerizing warmth and wetness of you. 

Reaching below you, you wrapped your hand around his cock, positioning it beneath you to lower yourself down, whimpering at the sweet stretch and sting of his girth, letting his tip kiss your cervix as he filled you with every inch of himself that you could take. For as many times as you had found yourself in this position, you were convinced that you would never get over just how full you felt with Javi inside you, and how breathtakingly incredible it felt. 

Cupping Javi’s strong jaw in your hands, your forehead rested against his as you let your hips start to grind into his, long and languid circles of your lower half, rolling back and forth, burying Javi’s cock deep inside the warm, wet walls of your cunt. 

“Fuck me. Holy fuck.” Javi groaned, his hands snaking up your front to grab your breasts, kneading the soft flesh greedily in his hands. His fingers reached for your pebbled nipples, rolling them between his thumb and index finger, the new sensation sending a jolt of pleasure to your core. 

That, combined with the hairs at the base of Javi’s cock rubbing deliciously on your clit and the way Javi’s cock punched against your g-spot was already making you see stars, vision going white and brain going blank from just how good he felt buried inside you.

Instinctively, you rocked your hips faster, feeling an all too familiar tingle begin to build at the base of your spine. Almost as if Javi could sense the way your cunt was starting to clench around his length, he couldn’t help but buck his hips up into yours, his thrusts filling you in a way that had you absolutely reeling and breathless, the two of you both teetering on the brink of collapse to chase your own highs. 

“You feel, oh shit- you feel so good, Javi. Feel so good inside me. I’m close, baby.” You whimpered, burying your hands in the sweat curled hairs at the nape of his neck, lost in your own pleasure as your stomach swirled faster and faster with arousal. 

You could tell Javi was close, too- The gritting of his teeth, the wild and wanting look in his sweet brown eyes, the sloppy pace of his dick pounding into you and nearly incomprehensible babbles were all the tells you knew far too well to realize he was quickly about to come undone. 

“Yeah? F-fuck, I love being inside you. So fucking wet and tight, holy fuck.” 

You could feel your walls beginning to tighten around him, moaning as you buried your head in the crook of his shoulder, fingernails digging crescent moons into his skin as you braced yourself for the wave that was about to crash through you. 

 “Fuck baby, don’t stop- ahhhh- please don’t stop.”

“I know, baby, I know. Let go for me, Osita. Wanna feel you soak my lap before I fuck you full of me. Gonna cum so deep inside this tight little pussy.” Javi reached down so the pads of his fingers rubbed along your clit as you rolled your hips, sinking yourself deeper onto his cock with each thrust, your vision going white as you could feel yourself come undone. 

“Fuckfuckfuckfuckkkkkkkk!” You cried out as you felt your orgasm pulse through you, pleasure shooting through your body as you came, clamping down around Javi’s cock and gushing with your arousal, your body melting limp into his as he followed suite. 

“That’s it, baby. I’m gonna- fuck- g-gonna cum too. Fuck me, gonna fill you so full of me you’re- oh shit- gonna be dripping out of me f-for da- Oh fuckkkkkk-” With a final stutter of his hips, Javi thrust up into you, letting the warm rush of his spend coat your walls, milking himself of every last drop before carefully pulling out, letting the rhythmic breathing of your chests rising and falling sync together. 

“Holy fuck.” Javi sighed, kissing your bare shoulder before letting his plush lips peck across your neck and jawline before meeting yours. “I think it worked.” 

“Think what worked?” You asked, still trying to come to in your blissed out state, gently combing your fingers through the sweat ridden curls of Javi’s hair, giggling as he knowingly ghosted his fingers across your stomach, smiling to himself at your ticklish laughter. 

“The stress relief. God, I love you. I’ll never know what the fuck I ever did to deserve you, but I won’t question it. Thank you, baby.” Javi grinned, softly swiping his thumb across your cheek, leaving his other arm to wrap around your waist and pull him closer to his chest. 

“I love you, too, Jav. Glad I could help. Hopefully this was enough motivation to get you through the rest of your work.” 

As you started to scoot yourself off Javi’s lap to clean up the mess of arousal, clothes, and a few scattered papers you had left in your wake, you were taken aback to feel his grip tighten around you, holding you in place. 

“It’s gonna be a long night, because I’m not even close to being done.” Javi smirked, his tongue darting between his lips as his eyes darkened with a hungry gaze. 

“Then you need to let me get off you, you goofball. Last time I checked, your naked wife sitting on your lap isn’t helping anyone to get paperwork done.” You teased, playfully crossing your arms over your chest, tilting your head at Javi in a mix of sass and confusion until a shriek of surprise escaped from your chest as Javi stood up to set you on top of his desk, caging his broad body over yours. 

“Oh I’m done with all of this shit,” He paused, gesturing to his desk before letting his kisses lazily trail down your body until he was on his knees with your legs draped over his shoulders, spreading them open to reveal the swollen and glistening mess still between your thighs, “but there’s not a chance in hell I’m done with you.” 

Taglist:

@chaotic-iguana @rhoorl @bbiophiliaa @purpleprincess75 @angelofsmalldeath-codeine

@pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24

@3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85

@partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo

@endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @milly-louise

@jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled

@pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper r @nastiasnow @vee-bees-blog

@hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @mandoisapunk @msmorningstaarr

@amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild

@copperhalfcent @theoraekenslover @bloodyinspirationaldemon @vee-bees-blog

@samgirl4life @pigeonmama @survivingandenduring @itsokbbygrl @javierpena-inatacvestnotifs

[nightwngz]

Could you do an enemies to lovers NSFW with Damian?

p.s. I’d just like to say your writing is SO good for someone whose first language isn’t English! I would not have known

ANIMALS !

older!damian x fem!reader

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀. . . drabble. smut. porn without plot. Dirty talk, degradation. Dacryphilia, humiliation kink, praise kink, Damian is mean. Some bdsm. Aggressive sex, bondage. Oral sex and fingering, p in v.

𝗰𝗼𝗽𝘆𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁. . . no copying of my work is allowed. Free translation is allowed as long as I am credited.

𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘂𝗮𝗴𝗲. . . as I said in my other posts, English is not my first language. I have tried to make corrections with the translator, but as you all know, it is prone to making mistakes, so I apologize in advance for any mistakes or if anything sounds weird.

𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲. . . Okay, I get it. Damian is your favorite character on my account, I get requests for him all the time and I love that because who doesn't love Damian? So here we go again. By the way, I'm glad you liked my writing! It is almost impossible for me to write without any grammar or vocabulary mistakes, but I keep trying! Thanks🌷 (Pd: if you reblog this post it would help me a lot) <3

— Do you want to stop?

From the vulnerability of your bed, shackled hand and foot, you thought it was a bad decision to bother Damian for so long. You thought you were just being funny, that no one would care that you were harassing Bruce Wayne's son. You had no idea what he was capable of doing to you.

— No.

A mischievous smile played on his lips as he stood over you; you could feel his weight on your body. In an instant, however, you felt yourself fall hard against the mat in the room.

— What do you have to say now? — He admired you from on high. — Aren't you the same funny girl you always were?

The sole of his shoe brushed your cheek. You felt incredibly humiliated, as if you were an inferior being in his presence. He looked at your body as if it were worthless.

— This would be amazing for anyone to see you: tied up, naked, on my bedroom floor. I can see your dripping pussy from up here. Who knew the amazingly cool girl would like this? — His shoe began to press harder against the flesh of your face. — You like it rough, guess what, I'm the best at it when I put my mind to it.

The wetness from your pussy dripped down your legs, leaving gray stains on the carpet. Damian, aware of this, walked around to stand behind you to get a close-up view of your ass. He easily slid a finger through your swollen folds and instantly it was stained with so much accumulated moisture.

— Damian, what are you going to do? — you asked, somewhat anxiously, but received no answer.

He bent his face down until his breath was in contact with your pussy; you quickly felt a mere shiver from your nervousness. Soon you felt his lips, and not long after, his whole hand making an obscene sound inside you; sliding up and down your wet folds, not yet reaching the pleasurable point that made you go wild.

— Damian... — You moaned softly as you buried your face in the carpet.

He didn't stop moving, he just kept playing with every part of her crotch, making you wish he'd concentrate on the throbbing clit that needed attention.

One of his fingers hovered around your clitoris and began to caress it gently. Just as you thought you were about to come, he pulled away.

— Didn't I tell you, y/n? Bad girls don't have orgasms.

You quickly began to cry. You knew that if he didn't give it to you, it would be incredibly impossible for you to get that orgasm on your own. So from your position, you just moved closer and started begging.

Kneeling down, you approached him and looked at him with your tearful eyes. Lamenting, with your face at the level of his knees, you still looked at him from the ground.

— Damian, please... — You sobbed. — I'm sorry for all the things I've done to you, but I really need you. I want you to fuck me. I'll do anything you want.

The young man simply smiled as he watched his enemy from his clearly superior position.

— Lool at this, the famous y/n now begging losers for some attention? I feel sorry for you. — He said in reference to how you used to tell him he was a loser.

He cut your bonds with a knife. You felt relief as the blood began to flow again.

You didn't notice as he grabbed your neck, almost choking you. He pulled you roughly close to his face until his lips collided with yours in a dirty, loveless kiss.

Finally, he pushed your face to the floor and lifted your ass until it was in the ideal position to fuck you. Without further ado, he rammed you hard and began to move hard inside you. As hard and precise as if he were an animal.

— What's the matter? Is it incredibly hard to believe that only I can fuck you like this?

[edgeray]

hii edge! is it possible if i request an arlecchino/reader with beauty & the beast au :0? thank you so much in advance aaaaaa i love your writing so much it always makes my day^^

To Break a Curse

(Arlecchino x GN! Reader)

A/N - Hi anon! Of course, here's going to be my reminder that if you request from me again as an anon, give yourself a name/emoji :). So I technically have already made a beauty and beast au (here is the link), but I suppose I could just rewrite the concept. The original au did differ a lot from the ‘disney’ version so for this one, so for this one, I will actually try to align this more with the disney version. Slightly dark because I'm not going to have talking kettles and candlesticks in here. Will be assuming gn! reader for this. Also I'm glad that you enjoy my works and bit sorry for the delay ^^ I am so sorry the ending is shitty at the end I am deadass about to fall asleep, I was this close 🤏 to falling asleep. I was typing with my eyes close lol. It's like 3:30AM for me so I'm gonna hit the hay. Maybe I should stop writing these at 12AM lol.  Content warnings / info - mean arle at the start, semi-graphic violence, prolly forgetting something but I'm tired, 2.7k words 

You've heard of the rumored forsaken prince, everyone in your village has. People rarely mention her by name, opting to call the cursed prince ‘the Beast,’ based on her animal-like claws and her temperament–just as vicious as a feral beast. The castle which she alone resides in sits on the outskirts of the forest next to your village. Every villager warns you to never trespass into the Beast's territory, unless you wished to never return. However, you've never believed in the existence of the Beast and her castle--after all, you've gone to the forests numerous times and have never encountered her. Perhaps this was just a way to scare off children from getting lost. 

Today, you learned how wrong you were. Venturing into the forest to forage for your dinner, you had accidentally delved too deep into the forest, now lost. Night approached soon as you searched for an escape or a shelter, but your search was unsuccessful.

Trudging through the forest, you heave for breath, your feet aching from traversing the rough terrain of the forest, not helped by the uncomfortable shoes you chose to wear. You thought that the foraging wouldn't take long but you found a large patch of mushrooms that led you deeper into the forest than you intended. You gaze up at the sky, it being pitch black with only the moonlight and the stars guiding you through. 

The shadows produced by the trees unnerve you, your imagination and paranoia warping them into abstract monsters stalking you. You know that there is nothing in the forest that can hurt you, unless the rare bear, but the knowledge didn't soothe you any more. You feel something hit your forehead–something light and small… and wet. It takes a couple more droplets before you realize it’s now downpouring. You bite your lip out of frustration, wrapping your arms around yourself to store as much body heat to yourself. Your footsteps speed up and you look more frantically, until you see something imposing in the distance. It's hard to make out in the fog, but it seems like the outline of some sort of building. 

You run towards it, only to be faced with a wall. You follow along it until you reach a gate, and behind the gate, you can vaguely make out a structure larger and more obscene than anything you've ever seen before; it looks nothing like the village establishments. If anything, it dwarfs your entire village as a whole, likely massive enough to fit your village inside based on the height alone. At least this would provide you shelter from the rain and cold, is the only consideration you make before pushing open the gates and rushing down the stone path. 

You nearly trip over the stone passage and as you arrive at the entrance, you soon realize it’s a castle. Its uncanny shape now makes some sense, but from then on lack of light through the windows, it seems like no one lives here. You press on, entering the castle. You’re thankful you're no longer being pelted by the rain and then you're immediately struck with awe from the decor and grandiose of the interior. Although the castle is unlit, you're still able to make out some details of the room you enter. Admiring the spiral staircase and the magnificent pillars, a thought strikes you. Why does no one inhabit the castle? 

Abruptly, there is the sound of something shuffling and it makes your marveling halt. Your heart drops to the pit of your stomach and fear clenches onto you tightly as the incessant terror of not being as alone as you though plagues you. Spinning around, you search for the origins of the sound only to scare yourself when you accidentally kick against a piece of furniture. You yelp out, before silencing yourself when you cognize it was nothing. 

And then a thud. And another, coming from behind you. Paralysis enraptures your body and before you have the time to breathe, a heavy weight crashes into you, making you tumble into the ground. You let out a scream, turning around to view what just struck you, and two glowing red orbs stare back at you. You gasp wildly, trying to scramble away when your throat is suddenly tightened and you're forced against the ground. It feels like claws are just barely brushing against your neck, threatening to puncture into you if you so much as breathe. A whimper escapes you and a whispered plea escapes you as you lock your eyes on the pair of red. 

“P-please…” 

A deep, resounding voice responds to you, causing shivers down your body. “What are you doing in my home?”

Tears well in your eyes and you try your best to speak as clearly as possible. “I-I'm sorry. I didn't k-know! I'll go, p-please let me go!” You beg, your hands raise to pry off the hand over your throat but a feral growl stops you. 

“Do you know whose home you intruded into?” 

You shake your head. The grip around your neck intensifies for a few moments.

“Speak.”

“N-no…” 

“This is my castle, Prince Arlecchino's. Though, the villagers like to call me something else… what was it, ‘the Beast?’”

You suck in an audible breath as your eyes grow wide. This is the Beast? The Beast is real? Then are the rumors of people disappearing in the castle true as well? What will happen to you? Your mind goes into a frenzy, with all the wonderings of what the Beast would do to you.

“P-please don't kill m-me…”

“Kill you? No,” the Beast answers coldly. The hold on your throat slackens and the Beast’s hand slips away. “I won't kill you. But you've trespassed my home. And for that, you will remain here, for the rest of your life.” 

“W-what? B-but,” you breath is caught when you feel a tug on your arm pulling you up to your feet, the same claws that pressed against your neck digs shallowly into your arm, making you wince. 

“This is your punishment,” the Beast says, its red pupils glaring down at you coldly. You gulp, but accept your fate. The Beast could easily kill you with one swipe of her hand. 

“Follow,” it instructs, and you do, trailing behind the Beast as it navigates the dark surroundings effortlessly, a testament to how long it's been here. You trip over another piece of furniture, making you stumble onto the ground. 

“I'm sorry–” you stammer out an apology immediately.

“Be quiet,” gruffed the Beast. You scramble to get up but feel yourself hoisted up, by the Beast presumably. You yelp from the sudden position, now carried in a bridal style–its hold is surprisingly gentle and its claws don't prick you.

“Where are you taking me?” You inquire, clutching onto the Beast’s shoulder–which for some reason shocks you that it’s firm just like any other human, although you know that the Beast is a human–when it goes up the staircase. 

“A guest chamber.”

“A guest chamber?” 

“Would you prefer the dungeon?”

“No… thank you… Prince Arlecchino.”

The Beast pauses its movements, halting in place. 

Your thoughts flood with anxiety, wondering if this would trigger a violent reaction from the Beast. “Did I offend you? I’m sorry, I really am.” 

“No. It's just been a long while since someone referred to me from my title.” The Beast continues walking, unaware of how its–her–words shattered your mindset. 

That's right, how could you forget? ‘The Beast’ is still a human, cursed or not. Perhaps Prince Arlecchino deserved being inflicted by a curse, but you could not imagine yourself with the fate instilled on the forsaken prince, nor being singularly called ‘the Beast’ by every waking person. It's dehumanizing and awfully isolating, and it makes you question how long it has been since she's been called that, how long it has been since she has been seen as a human. 

It makes your heart ache. 

You count the flight of stairs that she goes up, and then for the first time, you see orange light coming from one of the rooms at the end of a corridor–an open fire likely. As the Prince walks closer to the room, you're able to make out more details; it's a bedroom, but more apparently, you can finally see her. You tilt your head up, and you expectedly, yet unexpectedly at once, you view a very princely face: pale, flawless skin framed by snow white hair and ebony strands, and sharp jaw. Prince Arlecchino glances down at you, sharp cross-shaped pupils burrowing into you. Her expression seems curious of yours. 

“You do look like a prince…” you think out loud absentmindedly, your face flushing as you realize your verbalization. 

The Prince says nothing, thankfully, and doesn't note your fluster. You look away from her face and glance at her hands. Like you've heard from the villagers, they are black, as if dipped in ink and her nails are red claws. Though what the villagers have yet to mention was the markings on her forearm, which are, admittedly, entrancing. She finally sets you down once she enters her chamber, which is obviously well-lived in. 

Taking a nearby candle holder and a few logs of wood set nearby the hearth the Prince silently exits her room to go into the room next to hers. You follow her into the room, this one obviously not used but still has a lot of furniture. Using the logs and the candlestick, she ignites the hearth and what you assume is going to be your room fills with heat and light. 

“This is your room from now on. Do not ask for me for the rest of the night,” she gruffs, and closes the door behind her. Her footsteps go away towards the direction of her bedroom. 

You blink, reality setting in. You’re still in your wet clothes, but you can't do much but strip and wrap yourself in dry sheets. You do exactly that, before sinking into the bed. It's like how you imagine sinking into a cloud to be–you fall to slumber in the manner of minutes. 

— 

You do not see her until the next morning, when the sun finally peaks out and you're able to see where you walk. Exiting your room, you note that she's not in her chamber, and you wander the castle. A whiff of something metallic combined with a musk catches your attention and you travel down the stairs until you reach the ground floor. You spot a figure crouched over something, and when you near the sight more, you discover the Prince hunched over a deer carcass. A sickening rip makes you cringe as a limb is torn off from the body. 

“P-prince?” You ask hesitantly. The Prince turns, a calm expression over her face. Only a bit of blood smears her lips. 

“Yes?” 

“What are you doing?” 

“Eating. It is also for you.” 

You stew in silence long enough for the Prince to turn back and resume. “Prince Arlecchino, how long have you been surviving like this?” 

“Since I was cursed.” 

Your heart aches again. “It is raw.”

“Indeed.” 

“It cannot be good for you.”

“It is all I have.” 

It is a sad sight. You think that ‘the Beast’ fits her the best here, like a starved animal instead of a human trying to live. 

“Prince Arlecchino, if you allow me, I can improve your eating experience. It would be healthier for you and it would be more appealing to eat.” 

The Prince perks up her head, glancing back at you.

That day, the Prince learns of the wonders of cooked venison. And perhaps, you've never seen a brighter, warmer light than the one that glints in the Prince's at her first taste. 

—

“What is it that you're reading?” 

Arlecchino glances up from her book. “It is a romance novel.”

“I didn't think that you'd be interested in such things, Prince.” 

“You grow curious about things you do not have.” 

You frown and contemplate. It seems like… she's always wanted company. “Prince, may I ask you why you chose to isolate yourself here?”

The Prince remains quiet for several moments before she responds, in a voice uncharacteristically quiet. “The villagers do not accept my appearance.”

“Because of your curse?”

“Yes. They’re afraid of me. Of my eyes, of my hands. Of my strength.” 

“Have you not tried undoing the curse?”

She bitterly laughs. “There is nothing that breaks the curse. It is impossible.”

You narrow your eyes. “There must be something. There's no such thing as an unbreakable curse.”

“You are right. However, the conditions to break this one is… unobtainable.”

“What is it?”

 The Prince's gaze shifts from you to the stack of books that pile by her bedside. You recognize some of the titles from your village library–they were all in the romance category. You never realize until now that the Prince looks at them with a hopeless longing. “To be loved and to love, is what it is in simple terms.”

There is that heartache again. 

You shake your head, trying to any more painful thoughts circling around the Prince. “If you truly gave up on breaking your curse, you would not still be alive, would you?”

“I will not entertain this thought,” is all she says, but you know her answer already. 

You sigh. “Can I at least… read with you?”

The Prince tilts her head and pauses. A clawed hand grasps onto yours, and you're pulled into her lap. The steady heartbeat of Arlecchino's can be felt from the contact. 

— 

It takes several weeks for you to figure that the Prince does not enforce her punishment. You have escaped out of the castle before, if only to find more things to forage. She has seen you exit out of the castle but she does not chase you or force you to return back. Although you’d like to see the village again, you're also not sure if you do want to go back–the castle is quite comfortable and you’ve had enough of petty village squabbles. You wonder why it is that she doesn't stop you, why she was so forceful of it at the beginning. 

You recall the discussion regarding her curse. She had given up on finding a way to break her curse, however, she had always sought out company. Perhaps she had the punishment to force you to stay… to enjoy a company she has been able to for years. Now, Arlecchino has given up on you being a potential cure to her curse. It must be why she's no longer hesitant to let you go.  

But she is wrong. In those weeks you spend with her, you've learned much more about ‘the Beast.’ You've learned that she is kind in a quiet, observant manner. She's hunted for you, lit your fireplace, made your clothes. She cares for nature, appreciates its beauty and intricacy unlike anyone else you know. And she is romantic, some of the village men could not compare to her when she's read so many books. 

One day, a rose is left on your bed, no doubt collected on your bed. 

That night, you approach her room.

“Prince Arlecchino?”

“Yes?”

“The rose… thank you for it.” 

The Prince remains in silence, observing you with adoration in her eyes despite her bone chilling features. “You’re welcome.”

“Roses are often used as a way to confess,” you say. You know that she knows already, given the amount of books she read. “Is this what I think it is?”

Prince Arlecchino nods. Tentatively, she takes your cheek in her hand and cups it, her claws gently brushing over your skin. “Yes. I think I am in love with you.”

A smile forms on your face and you lean in to press your foreheads against one another, creating an intimate air. “I love you too, my dear Prince.” 

The two of you lean against one another, your lips meeting each other and you close your eyes. The Prince places a hand behind your head, pushing you closer. You don't notice that her nails are no longer red, nor are they sharp. She doesn't notice either. 

The ink from her arms wash away, and with that ‘the Beast’ is swept away, stolen away by you. Prince Arlecchino stands in place of the missing ‘Beast.’ 

[stevesbestgirl]

Phases of the Moon - Part 1

Steven Grant x f!Reader, eventual Marc Spector x f!Reader

2796 words

Warnings: poor imitations of British speaking habits, not much else in part one, maybe a few curses but I’m not sure

A/N: This was my attempt to write a slow-burn. It’s long, self-indulgent, and obscenely fluffy. Reader is specified as American, but mostly so I can avoid pretending I know anything about living in the UK. Steven and Marc are aware of each other and trying to find balance in their relationship in this fic, but keep in mind that I am not a system and am not an expert. All of my information about their relationship comes from the Moon Knight show and I use that as my reference point. 

*Bold type is spoken by Marc when Steven is fronting.*

Masterlist

“Go talk to her.”

“Well I can’t, can I?” Steven sent a furtive glance at you, toying absently with your phone while you examined the glyphs inside a display.

“Why can’t you?”

“She’s got earphones in.”

Marc scoffed in the glass of one of the display cases, “Always an excuse.”

“I can’t just interrupt her, that’d be rude!”

“Not if she’s interested.”

Steven’s reply was cut short as a pair of boys came rushing around the corner, laughing and shoving each other- Steven wouldn’t have placed them at older than twelve. He watched helplessly as one firm push sent the smaller of the two reeling into your backside. Completely oblivious to their noise, you went sprawling, headphones disconnecting as your phone hit the ground and was sent skittering across the polished floor, coming to rest at Steven’s feet.

Inhibitions gone, Steven scooped your phone up and rushed over, offering a hand to help you up, “Are you okay?” You nodded, feeling a little embarrassed. “You lot,” he called out, locating the pair sidling off behind a diorama, “C’mere.” 

They looked like they were considering bolting, but the smaller of them located Steven’s badge and took a reluctant step forward. By the time they stood in front of you, they were looking rather cowed, like puppies who’d been caught gnawing a slipper. 

“Shape up, you hear? You could’ve really hurt someone.”

“Sorry.”

“Yeah, sorry.”

“Now listen, down that corridor there, there’s a bunch of old weapons; spears, cudgels, daggers, the like. How about you go give it a look?” You watched him speak to the two boys; his enthusiasm seemed very genuine, not the fake kind adults often used with children.

The taller boy hesitated before leaving, “What’s a cudgel?”

Steven smiled a little, “Why don’t you go on and find out?” Then the two rushed in the direction he’d indicated and he called after them, “Slowly, hm?”

Once they were out of sight, you finally spoke, “Are you sure that was a good idea? Sending them in there with a bunch of weapons?” You couldn’t help but smile as he unconsciously smoothed his dark, nearly sleep-tousled curls back from his face.

His intent had been to chuckle, but it came out as more of an empty puff of air, “They’re all under glass- should be alright.” He added, “Maybe I’ll pop in to check on them, just in case.” Nervous now, he looked down at his hands, still holding your phone, “Oh, there you are.” Your expression fell and only then did he notice the spiderweb of cracks in the bottom corner where it had hit the floor, “Oh no.”

You shook your head, accepting the phone and dropping it to your side, like putting it out of sight would make him forget, “It’s alright. Just a screen protector. I’ll get a new one eventually.”

“Sorry about that, love,” he insisted, his earnest gaze finally meeting yours just in time for your face to go warm. You’d thought you’d been ready to hear the term of endearment used so casually when you came to England, but apparently not.

“It’s alright,” you rushed to speak. “Definitely not your fault. Thanks for helping me-” you glanced at his name tag, “-Steven.”

“No problem- it is my job after all,” he cracked a halfhearted smile.

“You were great with those kids too.”

Rosy warmth tinged his cheeks and his gaze shifted away, “Thanks.” A small pause, “Your accent- you’re American?”

You nodded, “Needed a change of scenery, so I’m staying with some family for a while. Just got in yesterday, actually.”

His gaze eagerly lifted to yours again, but flicked away over your shoulder and he went slightly pale. Glancing back, you saw a stocky woman with dirty blonde hair gesturing impatiently at him.

Returning his gaze to you, he looked a bit panicked, “I’m sorry, I’ve gotta go. I- ah-” He tripped over his words and almost tripped almost his feet as well, veering around you and backing away toward the woman beckoning him over. 

You raised your hand in an uncertain farewell as he stammered his way backwards, gesturing faintly over his shoulder with his thumb in a faint attempt at an explanation. Once he was within range, the woman seemed to be lighting into him a bit, though his gaze hadn’t yet left you. It wasn’t until she snapped her fingers that he looked at her. 

Not wanting to spy, you turned away, checking your phone for the time. When Steven glanced your way again, he only caught your retreating form disappearing out the entrance. For once, Donna’s criticisms didn’t affect him since he was already kicking himself for not asking you out. Or getting your phone number. Or even your name. He’d blown it. 

*

The following day, you had a bit more time to explore the museum, so you returned. And you noted with dismay, when the cabbie called you “love”, you didn’t so much as blink, let alone blush. Maybe it had been a one-off thing. Now you would be immune. 

Walking in and spotting the woman from before at the front desk, you plucked up a bit of courage and approached. Her name tag read “Donna” and she prompted with visible disinterest, as though she were reading off a script, “Welcome. Is there something I can direct you to?”

Deciding to push forward, you said, “Actually, I was just in here yesterday. I ran into a bit of trouble with a couple of young boys and one of your tour guides helped me. I wanted to let you know that Steven was very polite and just lovely with those kids-”

“Stevie? He isn’t a tour guide,” Donna interrupted, wrinkling her nose. “In his dreams, maybe.”

“But he does work here?”

“Yeah, he’s the gift shoppist.” She was still being very flippant; it was clear that she’d barely had interest in this conversation to begin with and now that it was about Steven, it had dwindled to none. 

“Right. Thank you.” You forced a smile and nodded before heading off in the direction of the gift shop.

The counter was empty when you first walked into the room, sending a tiny shoot of disappointment into your chest. You wanted to thank him, since it didn’t appear that you could score him any points with his boss.

You wondered for a moment if you should come back later, but then a shaggy, brown mop of hair sprung up from behind the counter, triumphantly brandishing what appeared to be a large, amber-colored marble with a bone inside it, “Got ya, you little bugger.”

His gaze fell on you and he tucked the marble behind his back, like it was something to hide, “You- you came back.”

You reached into your bag, pulling out the brochure you’d picked up yesterday, “I was only passing through yesterday.” You unfolded the brochure and showed him the notes you’d taken on the map, detailing where you wanted to go first and which exhibits had caught your eye, “I like to plan a little bit.”

He followed the line you traced with your finger intently, raising his gaze to your face when you pulled away, “That’s a good way to go about it. The tour is pretty good too.” Steven’s heart skipped as your lips pulled into a slight frown; had he said something wrong? 

“Speaking of the tour, I tried to put in a good word for you with your boss- as thanks, for yesterday- she doesn’t seem to like you very much.”

“Oh, yes. Donna and I have got a bit of a rocky history.” He added quickly, “Not a history, mind you. More like a boss/employee history. I’ve got a bit of a bad track record with my punctuality, actually,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Well, I think you’d make a lovely tour guide, for what it’s worth.”  

There was another one of those long pauses; you were about to offer a meek “Thanks again,” and cut your losses when he spoke up, “If you like, I’m on a break in ten minutes. I could show you around.”

You’d insisted to yourself that this wasn’t why you came back here, but you found yourself nodding, a faint smile on your lips, “I’d like that.”

Steven seemed even more surprised than you were, nodding quickly, “Great- that’s- great.” He nodded again, “I can meet you in the ‘King’s Tomb’ exhibit.” He pointed, “Right over there-” He checked his watch, “-in nine minutes.”

Your smile widened, “See you in nine minutes then.” You moved off in the direction he’d indicated, the temptation to look back gnawing at you. 

“Wait!” he called after you. You turned back, “I haven’t got your name.”

“You haven’t needed it, have you?” 

Now you were teasing and you knew it. But you could feel his eyes on you as you disappeared around the corner and you smiled to yourself. So much for doing your own thing. The whole reason for coming to London was to get away from men- although you supposed it was more one man than men in general. But something about Steven just caught your eye.

So you waited out the impossibly long eight minutes remaining until Steven walked in, looking in a bit of a rush. You watched him scan the exhibit, almost like he’d expected you to have left by now.

You raised a hand, “Steven.” He positively lit up at the sight of you, relief visible in the heavy exhale he released- like he'd been holding his breath. 

You met him in the center of the room, clasping your hands behind your back in anticipation. Steven still had the remnants of a grin on his face, though he mirrored your posture, a bit of enthusiasm escaping as he bounced on the balls of his feet, just once, “What do you want to see?”

“You’re my tour guide, you tell me,” you teased. 

Almost instantly, his face flushed, “Well, I wasn’t sure if there were specific displays you wanted to look at or certain subjects you were interested in, you know? Since I've only got fifteen minutes on my break.” 

“Well, I’m interested in everything, but since we only have fifteen minutes; how about you show me the way you’d start your tour if you were a guide?” His cheeks darkened further and you had to bite the inside of your cheek not to smile again. But he surprised you, recovering quickly and placing his hand on your arm. He steered you over to one of the displays and you glanced at him, “The Ennead?”

The Ennead,” he corrected your pronunciation. “The Egyptian Gods.” He wheeled around so his back was to the exhibit, his gaze meeting yours with ease. “Everything about Egypt comes back to the gods one way or another, so to understand Egypt, you have to understand them.”

He walked you through the exhibit, one god or goddess at a time, his hands moving animatedly as he talked. And he was good at it, in a different way than you’d expect. He had such a wealth of knowledge- you felt comfortable asking questions because you expected him to have the answers. And he answered many of your questions before you could even ask them; his explanations were pretty comprehensive. 

It was all strangely charming, actually. His enthusiasm was so genuine, it was as though he invited you inside it with him. It was a nice place to be- like sharing a secret. It was also putting you in dangerous territory; a magnetic field that would be hard to pull yourself from.

Once you were about halfway through the eleven, you tentatively raised your hand. Steven faltered slightly, giving you the chance to speak up, “Two things- I just want to check the time, I’d hate for you to be-”

“Late-” he checked his watch faster than you could pull out your phone.

You grabbed his hand, pulling him back toward the gift shop, “Well, come on then, I don’t want you getting into trouble!”

Steven’s long strides quickly outpaced you; you had to hurry to keep up, a laugh at the ridiculousness of it slipping out. Steven glanced back- nearly shouldering a display case. Right before impact, his back straightened a bit, like he sensed it coming, and he just twisted out of the way. It was so smooth you wouldn’t have noticed the deft movement if you hadn’t been anticipating the collision.

By the time you skidded to a halt in front of the gift shop counter, you were full-on giggling; you couldn’t remember the last time you’d laughed so hard over almost nothing. “Sorry about that,” Steven offered meekly.

You took a breath and collected yourself a bit, though you still felt the warmth of the laughter in your cheeks, “Don’t be- it was fun.”

“What was the other thing?” he asked, shuffling back behind the counter.

“Hm?”

“You said there were two things, the time and what else?”

“Oh! Well that exhibit was called the ‘King’s Tomb,’ right? Why are the gods in that one?”

He leaned on the counter, some of his timid demeanor vanishing, “Well, the pharaohs were considered to be gods by their people. So they put them in a room together. And since the mummies are what brings in the crowds, they get the-” he clicked his tongue, framing a little marquee with his fingers, “-title spot.”

“I suppose you know quite a lot about those too?”

He gave a chagrined smile, “Did I go on a bit much then?”

You shook your head, “Not at all- I wasn’t teasing. I wish we’d had time to do the whole exhibit.”

“I’d wager with me giving it, that tour would take all week,” he joked, feeling like he’d done too much talking during your time together.

You shrugged, “I’m on vacation.” Smiling, you added, “Or holiday, you’d probably call it.”

He smiled weakly at the joke, seeming to be working out what you’d meant. He scanned your face, as though nervous he was misreading you, but you just smiled at him. “I’m scheduled again on Thursday, I could- if you like, I mean- I could show you some more. Of the exhibit. Obviously. If you want.” 

You were here for freedom. You’d come all the way to another country so you could do what you wanted, when you wanted, no strings attached. But, you reasoned, this wasn’t dating. This was an exclusive tour, on Steven’s break. It wasn’t like he was taking you out to dinner.

You were bargaining; whittling away your rules to nothing because they no longer suited your purposes. You knew that. And you also knew that you only did so because Steven was, very clearly, a large string. A large string with lovely, brown, puppy eyes and enough passion for Egypt to make a pharaoh blush. But you nodded anyway, “I’d love to come back. Same time?”

He seemed stunned by your acceptance, but he nodded rapidly to overcompensate for the moment of hesitation, “Yeah. My break is at three.”

You smirked, “How many minutes from now?”

He stared at you for a moment- you almost wondered if he was trying to do the math, but then he flushed and gave a weak chuckle, “Right, I’ll work on that one.”

You pulled out the brochure you’d picked up yesterday and a pen from your bag, “Since I won’t be needing this anymore-” You scribbled down your name and number and slid the brochure across the table, “Text me when you figure it out.” No strings, you reminded yourself.

He gave another hurried nod, “Okay, I will, I-” 

You got a sense of deja vu as Steven glanced over your shoulder and paled in nearly the exact same way he had yesterday. “Is it Donna?” You quickly scanned the counter, grabbing a stuffed hippopotamus, “Because I’d like to purchase this.” You deliberately moved it across the counter where Donna would be able to see and pulled out your wallet.

Now Steven looked back to you, “You don’t have to do that. Most of this stuff if junk-”

“I want to. This one is kind of cute.” You held out the money, “And you’ll tell me all about it next time?”

He nodded, a small smile returning to his face, “Yeah, I will.” He handed back your change and the plush, speaking up so Donna could hear, “Enjoy the rest of your afternoon.”

You smiled, “Same to you.”

You left the other way so Donna wouldn’t see your face, hoping she wasn’t descending on Steven for being late from his break. You held the little hippo plushie to your chest and thought ahead to Thursday.

[somber-sapphic]

Hi!! Um so I just read your Carina DeLuca x Maya Bishop x Reader and now I’m opposed. Your writing got me into this ship and this show bahaha- and speaking of your writing I f*cking love it. Literally lights up my day/days whenever I read one of your posts and I get so excited ahaha so legitimately thank you🥲 if possible could you do another one of Carina DeLuca x Maya Bishop x Reader? Idrc about what prompt, just like a bad situation, to worse to better you know. If you don’t want to write for them I’d love to read another WandaNat x Reader🫣 (but if u really need a prompt something like insult to injury) thank you!

I hope you’re doing okay and it’s okay if you aren’t <3 and hopefully u are taking care of yourself. I’ve been reading ur fics for ages so if u ever need like a randoms imaginary shoulder to cry on I’ve got you ;) 🌸

Worse Alone

I am so, so sorry it took me so long to get to you 🌸! I can't express in words how much what you said means to me though, like (and I say this a lot, I know, but it's true) stuff like this truly gives me so much motivation. I love you so much and I will give you my imaginary shoulder any day that you need it. Btw, you don't have to sensor your swears unless you truly want to, I am the queen of obscenities <3

[[Summary]] Smoke and semi-working lungs don't go too well together. But you have a job to do. (marina x reader)

Word Count: 1.8k

-----

A five-hour blaze wasn’t something that anyone wanted to deal with, but it was something that you and your team knew how to deal with. Of course, it was dangerous for everyone around, but it was also thrilling. You all ran into fires for a reason, the eight of you were adrenaline junkies who felt the irresistible need to save lives. 

Every so often after a particularly rough day Maya, Carina, and you would just curl up together in bed, no one sleeping despite how exhausted the three of you would be. The brunette would alternate between stroking your hair and rubbing Maya’s back, cushioned in between the two of you as if she needed the pressure to prove to her that you both were safe. 

To call today a ‘rough day’ would be an understatement. Thankfully everyone had survived, but a young woman had been sent to Grey Sloan with severe burns, screaming about her baby. The baby, a severely annoyed two-year-old, was thankfully fine. The little boy had been distracted fairly quickly as the other paramedics checked him over, focusing on the stethoscope which he for some reason found absolutely fascinating. 

His mother was rushed to the burn unit but from what you and everyone else knew she was holding strong and the boy's other mom was taking care of him. That wasn’t the worst part though. The worst part was that your body was utterly pissed with you for deciding to treat it so badly and it was taking it out on you at the worst possible time. 

You had done the best that you could when it came to fighting the blaze, resisting the urge to attach yourself to an oxygen tank even when you were outside of the house, away from the smoke. Entering the house was an atrocious idea, but your girlfriend was in there. You had ignored Andy’s orders and raced to rescue the woman you loved.

The blonde knew that you weren’t feeling very well, she had heard you coughing in the bathroom before the call had come in and had tried to convince you to go home. Then of course the alarm sounded and there was nothing that either of you could do. Sure you wanted to be anywhere but inside a burning building with your lungs already starved for oxygen, but it wasn’t like you had much of a choice. 

Maya was fine, momentarily hindered when a piece of the roof collapsed leaving her needing to find a new way to get herself out. You had helped despite her protests that she could do it on her own and that you needed to leave. Instead of doing what she asked of you, you took the time to help her get out, working strategically and quickly around the debris. 

You made it through without passing out even a little bit and the fire was finally extinguished. When you got outside you pulled your helmet off and half stumbled over to Ben in search of oxygen. He noticed your struggle and passed over a mask, asking repeatedly if you were okay as you sat down on the bumper of the Aid Car, your gear practically pulling you down. Gravity was not working in your favor. 

“Y/n, let me take your jacket off,” Ben ordered, sounding like a doctor. He was a doctor. The damn man had too many careers, it sometimes frustrated you just how accomplished he was. 

“Back off, Probie.” You rasped, shrugging him away. Technically you had rank over him, so technically you could order him around. The loophole totally worked for you as long as it mean that he’d leave you alone. You didn’t have any problem with Ben as a person, he was actually a pretty nice dude, but you had absolutely no wish to be ‘Doctored’ right now.

You were expecting to be yelled at, but thankfully Andy hadn’t come over to shout while you were still on the scene. You could see her casting you frustrated looks while she talked to your girlfriend, but left it alone. That only lasted until you got to the station.

“L/n!” Andy yelled, stomping over to you. She looked angry but also concerned. Maya was beside her, wearing a similar expression. “What the hell were you thinking? You endangered every one of us!” The captain snapped, glaring down at you. 

You stood to meet her gaze, trying to look less weak than you felt. Fighting her on this was probably a poor decision, but you had no intention to take this lying down. 

“I was doing my job, Captain.” You bit back. Andy bristled at the comment, rage hardening in her eyes. The woman beside her bit back what would definitely be a remake would probably upset everyone and reserved herself to a slight shake of the head. 

“Check. Your. Tone. L/n. I am your boss, not your punching bag. I don’t care that you aren’t feeling well, that doesn’t give you an excuse to be an ass. You could have gotten yourself and others hurt.” Now it was your turn to bristle. 

“Maya was trapped, she needed-”

“She needed you to do what you are told instead of ignoring direct orders. You aren’t the only one on this team Y/n, do you understand that? If you ever do something so stupid again I will have you suspended. For now, you will be taking two weeks paid leave. Take care of yourself. Come back when you’re done making stupid decisions.” Her voice softened on the last sentence, expression fading from stern boss to worried friend. 

You sagged slightly, shrugged, and looked over at Maya in hopes to find support there. 

“Come on Y/n. Carina’s off today, I bet she’ll make you some soup.” She held out a hand and part of you didn’t want to take it. Part of you wanted to prove yourself to your boss, but Maya’s offer was too good to pass up. Carina made the best soup and she was always so good at knowing exactly what you needed. 

You took the hand and allowed yourself to be led out of the station, ignoring everyone’s kind words and well wishes. Maya got you situated in the car, both of you silent. She was incredibly gentle, brushing your hair away from your face and lingering a bit with her touches, but she was still frustrated with you. It was okay, you understood. You had scared her. 

The ride home was quick and quiet. You were half asleep and Maya was listening to the radio, your cough overpowering the soft music. Carina would probably insist that you sleep with at least two humidifiers tonight, but it wouldn't matter, at least you’d be with them. 

You let your eyes slip closed and you leaned against the cool window, shivering in your loose clothes. You wanted your bed and someone to hold you. Unfortunately, you’d have to wait for those things. They’d probably make you shower before you were allowed to climb into the bed.

You were right. The second you got into the house Carina was all over you, asking a flurry of questions and speaking in rapid-fire Italian about your condition. Normally you loved to listen to speak the language that you didn't understand, but now it was just messing with your mind. 

She had ordered you and Maya into the bathroom, promising to have your room made up with whatever she believed that you would need to feel better. The shower was nice enough. Maya washed your hair, allowing you to lean back against her in your exhaustion. It was tough to stay standing, but she was there, making sure that you would be okay. 

“M’sorry.” You rasped, blinking teary eyes at the worried looking blonde. She tilted her head to the side and smiled, gripping your elbows tightly. 

“Babe, I just want you to be safe. I’m sorry you don’t feel well. I wish that you had told one of us sooner, then you would have gotten to be with Carina all day. It could have been a good day, not an awful one. Okay?” You nodded your understanding and sniffled softly, your nose running in what you were sure was a disgusting way. Maya looked at you lovingly nonetheless. 

When the brunette said that she was going to get everything you could possibly need, she had really meant it. The room that the three of you shared was decked out in everything one would want for a sick day. Boxes of tissues, a mug of tea on the bedside sitting beside a glass of apple juice, three humidifiers, a bottle of cold medicine, a fluffy blanket, and extra pillows.

“You did that pretty fast, Car.” You forced out, climbing into the bed with the help of both of your girlfriends. Maya followed and wrapped her arms around your waist, holding you close while Carina measured out a dose of medicine. 

“Si, I work quickly. Now open your mouth, I want to see how high your temperature is.” She was in work mode right now, they’d be time for joking after you did what you were told. You pouted but opened your mouth, holding the thermometer under your tongue. The brunette carded her fingers through your hair as you waited for the reading, looking utterly disappointed. 

“102.3, oh Y/n, no wonder you do not feel well. Take this, alright? Then you can go to sleep.” She kissed your forehead, prompting you to obey her wishes. You were a sucker for physical attention, even more so when you were sick. 

The medicine tasted like you licked a fake plastic cherry and stung your throat, but it was what it was. Both women smiled when you finished it and you got twin kisses on each of your cheeks. These women were amazing. 

You felt your eyes fill with tears and you ducked your head, not wanting to show them that you were about to cry. That was just too much, they didn’t need to deal with your unnecessary emotions at the same time. 

“Oh baby, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” Maya crooned, tilting your chin back up so that you were forced to meet her crystal blue eyes. You felt Carina’s arms slip around your waist as she sat on your other side and that was about all that you could take. 

You broke into stifled sobs and pressed your head against the blonde's shoulder in search of comfort. You didn’t want to talk about it, you just wanted to cry. Which was stupid, because earlier you had been completely fine. Now you were bawling like a baby in the arms of your girlfriends. 

Neither of them said anything while you cried, they just let you, holding you close until you were too tired to cry anymore. You didn’t actually remember falling asleep, all that you knew was that one minute it was dark out, and the next you were laying down with your head on Carina’s chest, both of the women asleep beside you. 

Your body still hurt and you still felt disgusting, but at least you weren’t alone. Being sick and alone was worse than being sick with people who loved you.

[simplepotatofarmer]

Hi! Sorry if this is a bit deep and ramble-y but it’s just something that’s been on my mind. Have you ever doubted defending dream?

Sometimes I feel like I’m wrong for feeling bad for him. I feel like I get where some ppl are coming from when they say why they hate him but then am horrified by what they do with that hatred.

I keep telling myself that it’s normal to feel empathy for someone that you could see was facing a lot of shit. I felt bad for him in April, but also felt bad for feeling bad because everyone was saying how he was a horrible person who deserved horrible things. Looking back, and reading some ppls reflections on it, it’s much more obvious how April specifically was just an obscene hate campaign, but even then I have moments of doubt just because of how universal the idea of dream always being in the wrong seems to be, especially in this community.

Even with the most recent incident, where I did step away for a while, I felt bad for him and his friends for the things their fans were doing. But then I also felt bad for feeling bad because so many ppl on here say that the extreme means are necessary.

Even though I am more of a causal fan, I don’t want to live in an echo chamber and I think the ppl in the fandom who I do follow (like you) are pretty rational about everything. I’ve tried following other ppl but there’s just this everpresent hatred of him that I don’t like seeing everyday on my dash. But I again feel wrong for feeling that way. It’s all just frustrating.

i was going to sleep but this is actually a really important ask, in my humble opinion.

the short answer is no.

the long answer is absolutely not, i've never regretted defending him over the things i have defended him over because even if he was a terrible person and not like, a dude none of us know personally who is not perfect and makes mistakes and is sometimes a fucking idiot, those would still be things i would defend him for.

defending someone against absolutely vile queerphobia is never something i'd regret because it's quite simply just the right thing to do. erasing someone's identity because you don't like them is wrong, point blank. blair white or caitlynn jenner are no less deserving of respect as trans women than any other woman.

defending dream against ableism is always gonna be the right thing because you don't have to be a good person to deserve not to be treated awfully due to your neurodivergence.

and like, there's been things i've defended dream on where i don't completely agree with him. i think he's been a little baby sometimes when it comes to mcc but when people were saying shit like he was '''manipulating''' us and noxcrew because he said he didn't want to play in mcc if he had to play buildmart, yeah i'm going to point out that's a batshit take. someone venting and being frustrated isn't manipulation, he was just throwing a tantrum. touch grass yada yada.

and when it comes to my belief that people can be racist in the past and change, that still applies! i still think dream actively tried to be better! he grew up in a bigoted environment, is open about his racist past (and fucking uses the word racist/bigoted, thank god) and is actively working to be better.

that's always going to be true and frankly, i think it's not only weird but extremely telling that a LOT of white people who had formerly defended him suddenly switched up. it just shows that it was never about the harm done and poc but whether or not you liked some white boy.

but i digress.

the thing is, anon, i get why you feel this way. this fandom and online culture as a whole lately is wrought with the belief that consumption of media is a reflection of your morals. that consuming the right media and being a fan of the right sort of person is akin to activism.

it's not. it doesn't fucking matter. there's no righteousness in hating dream. you can certainly be valid in hating him! there's a lot of reasons to dislike him or hate him or feel he shouldn't have a platform. i might not agree with it all but i can see it.

the problem is.... i see why you feel like this and that is genuinely so sad and messed up because how did we get to the point where queerphobia or ableism or body shaming is totally okay as long as it's a certain group and to where people doubt themselves when they think it's wrong! it is wrong but i completely understand why anyone would second guess themselves.

as it stands right now, i don't regret it because i feel it's right. i'm always going to feel it's right.

if something comes out tomorrow and it turns out that it really is more than some instagram dms and the questionable choice of giving out his private snapchat, then i won't be defending him.

but i still wouldn't regret any of my past defense because my defense isn't conditional, my belief that people can grow isn't conditional, and my opinion on things like fandom's queerphobia and misuse of terms like 'grooming' would still stand.

[the-real-sasuke-uchiha]

Hi Sasuke! You're more experienced at Tumblr than I am. I've had Tumblr for quite a bit but have only started posting recently. I got my first hate comments (I know, big milestone) on some of my posts by the same person. I tried to disprove them and such, and I'm going to make a post disproving it, but I was wondering what's the best way to deal with haters? Like, do I remove their comments, leave them alone, or block them? I was just wondering what you recommend and what you do. Hope you're having a great day!

Hi there! I am not that experienced though. But my general advice is don't get too worried, don't take it seriously and don't feed the drama. It is just a random person on the internet, they have no power over you or your life, so don't give them power over your feelings. Would an opinion of a random person you walk by in the street have any meaning to you? This is the same, just a random person walking by, with the advantage that they are not even physically nearby to forcefully take your attention. You are free to ignore at your convenience.

If someone sends me asks with hate/insults/obscenities I don't even finish reading, I straight out block and delete. Same with comments, I don't even know if you can delete them, I just block and ignore. Sometimes, hate is so ridiculous and surreal that it gets even funny. Take it with humour, really, never let it get to you.

This is about personal hate, of course. If the hate is directed towards a character or something I enjoy, I don't have any problem with that, I actually like discussing and I hate a lot of characters myself. Unless the character hate it is accompanied with condescend or veiled insults towards me, of course. It is just like in real life, you know? we can disagree, but we all have to be respectful. Otherwise, I have better things to dedicate my time to than entertaining rude bored people on the internet.

But this is me, I know some people have other preferences. Many people don't like to discuss and don't like to see their views challenged or their favourite characters criticized. Do whatever feels comfortable, really. Don't engage with someone because you feel compelled to. You are here to have fun, not to do labour.

Finally, something that helped me keep random haters away is tagging every post properly and using less generic tags. For example, I use "pro Sasuke Uchiha" instead of "Sasuke Uchiha" for my rants, so my posts are restricted to a more specific audience. I also use the "anti" tag when I criticize a character because I know some people have meltdowns if they see something they don't agree with. In this way, they can block posts that they want to avoid.

Anyway, stay safe and try to have fun despite the haters. Sorry for the long post, and take care!

[blarrghe]

Shop talk! I know you're currently doing the whole writing and posting thing differently than before - like the whole thing is written, you're just editing and posting once a week. So what do you think of that? Do you prefer it over how you worked previously? Does it depend on the fic??

And how much editing are we talking? Both in terms of words changed as well as time spent on it? Do you do editing the next chapter for a whole week? Are you constantly editing all upcoming chapters??

Thanks for the ask! I love talking about this stuff :) Sorry for the obscenely long answer.

So it's the first time I've done that, and now that I'm in the posting part I am liking it a lot. I like the structure, I look forward to Wednesdays, I feel like I gathered a little bit of an audience that is there weekly with me as well, which is nice for everyone. I don't know if it makes any difference to people in terms of engagement if they hear that its completed in advance or see it posting regularly, but idk if it was me as a reader I would appreciate the regularity so I hope people do. At least one person has told me they're waiting to read it until it's finished/waited to start until it was over half posted, idk if I'll suddenly get new readers when its up in full or what but I def understand that. But yeah! The posting weekly thing has been nice. It feels productive even if I actually don't do a ton of writing every week.

Actually writing the thing took like two years though, specifically because there was absolutely no gratification to it haha. I didn't really even post wip snippets or talk about it much, because I wanted to keep my secrets. I was writing either Matchsies or A Complicated Match still when I had the idea and started plotting, so part of it taking so long is also that I was dividing my attention, and devoting more of it to the ongoing stuff I was actually posting. But I started this fic with the intention of letting it be a slow side-burner project so that I could make it "really good" by the time it went up. And that was a good call, because I did a lot of re-writes and re-structuring to elements of it, especially some of the early chapters, when I got further into the plot. To be clear, it's had the same outline all along, but there were connecting details that didn't work, like logistical travel time things that would have been glaringly annoying if I'd posted the first drafts of the first few chapters before writing the later ones. Also I re-vamped Sylvanna's character really early on into a more major role. She wasn't originally a bodyguard! Or really a main element of the story at all. Absolution came out at some point and I got Ideas.

Anyway, a lot of the editing that went into the fic before I started posting was pretty major, but by the time I was ready to actually start posting everything was much more concrete. I tend to edit the next chapter in the days before it goes up, and right before posting, mainly just for little details. But I try to give myself some distance and not overdo the constant editing so that when I do look at it right before posting I have some fresher eyes, right now I haven't looked at the next chapter (lying, I read it last night, but not from an EDITOR standpoint) in a couple weeks and I plan to put on editor glasses tomorrow morning before I post it. A big part of the editing that is ongoing is for how the prose reads, like I might come up with some gorgeous metaphor or re-do how a scene is described but keep the content the same. You get better all the time as a writer, so it's just about getting the Good Copy as Good as I can before it goes up. Every now and then I have a genius thought and go stick it in where it fits. Every now and then I also delete stuff or have a genius thought that doesn't actually fit and stick it in "CUT CONTENT" on the bottom of the doc. There's some Taren-perspective Bher stuff in there that didn't work with how I structured Ch. 20, for example. I was thinking for a sec I'd re-write that whole chapter and do a flashback chapter for him but it did not suit the flow at all and I only got a couple paragraphs in and then just... added like two lines of Taren Thoughts to get the point across instead haha. I also cut a couple chapters in half but didn't change them (19 and 20 are an example, which is also why a ch. 20 rewrite did not work.)

The most major edits I've made have been to the last two chapters, mainly to add in a few new ideas I had or to tie up loose ends I realised I was still leaving. I haven't majorly changed any of what was going to happen, it's more just me trying to really nail those last chapters. I am also constantly re-reading it in full (sometimes making minor tweaks to names in the narration ;) and also boring stuff like punctuation). I'll post a chapter and immediately get excited for the next one and go read from that point to the end...

There's also a "secret" epilogue that I wrote, really liked, and then cannibalized and entirely re-wrote like, yesterday. I wasn't initially sure I'd even post it but now I definitely will. So stay tuned for that ;)

[bcofl0ve]

Invisible String (Part 6)

part 6/9

ship: austin butler x fem!reader

summary: a summer fling when you were working on the set of the shannara chronicles turned your life upside down with a positive pregnancy test after austin returned to the united states. a pregnancy test, and a daughter that you never told him about. until the elvis biopic found him back in your orbit and forced you to face the music.

chapter summary: austin comes back from the week long stint in the u.s., things are discussed and things are realized.

word count: 3780 (longest part yet!)

author’s note: V*MIT TW in the last day/chunk, but nothing too graphic! this is very dialogue heavy but our fav doofuses have quite a bit to talk about 😅 next chapter is an austin pov interlude thing and i am VERY excited for that so ty for sticking with me here!

i live for comments and love talking about my writing, feel free to pop me an anon anytime!

xxx

June 28th, 2020

You sent Austin a text after you listened to the voicemail saying you got it and did want to talk. But outside of quick hellos and goodbyes on the outskirts of him facetiming Cora you hadn’t said much else to each other. And you didn’t want to prod on his first day back after he spent an obscene amount of time traveling, so you settled on trying to catch him at the end of everyone’s first day back on set.

It was a late night- but you didn’t think you’d sleep if you put it off another day. 

Spotting him heading in the same direction you were as you got closer to his trailer, you walked a faster to catch up to him. Austin turned when he heard the footsteps, looking startled until he realized it was you.

“Didn’t mean to scare you,” You supplied and he waved you off. “‘is alright.”

It fell silent between the two of you again, and you crossed your arms over your body, suddenly feeling small in the dimly lit trailer lot. 

“Follow me home? Cora will be in bed, but if you still wanna talk,”

“I do.” He said quietly, adding that he just had to change and then you could head out. When he climbed the steps and opened the trailer door to go inside he didn’t close it right away, tilting his head back towards you.

So you followed him in, standing against the closed door as he pulled his costume off and changed into street clothes. 

“How was your trip back?” You tried after a minute and he chuckled under his breath as he tugged his sweatshirt over his head. “Really fuckin’ long.”

The quip broke some of the tension at least, the two of you making amicable small talk as you walked to the parking lot. The next ‘big thing’ being filmed was the Vegas residency, the way Austin practically buzzed as he talked about how excited he was almost making you forget you were upset with him. 

Almost. 

“Go say goodnight if you want, I’m gonna make tea.” You said as you opened your front door and he disappeared down the hallway while you relieved the babysitter. You were sitting cross legged on the couch when he came back out, standing in the mouth of the hallway looking almost nervous to approach. 

“Sorry for being such a bitch on the phone.” You said bluntly as he finally did walk over.

“Hey, don’t call my baby mama a bitch.”

A laugh escaped at that, but then Austin sat down next to you and you were nervous all over again.

“And you weren’t being a bitch anyways, you were hurt.” 

“Didn’t really have the right to be, you can't cheat on someone you're not dating.” You stated, Austin not letting that go without a rebuttal either.

“Sure, but I think I earned the tongue lashing.”

Biting the inside of your cheek, you took a short breath to gain a smidgen more composure before you started talking again.

“Said in your voicemail that you didn’t sleep with her.” 

You looked down and focused in on a loose thread hanging off your cardigan sleeve, seeing him sit up a little straighter out of the corner of your eye.

“I didn’t. She was kinda upset when we were talking about Cora. I didn’t wanna be a douche so I tried to comfort her and she had her head on my shoulder. Got done snifflin’ and kissed me.”

Hm.

You didn’t disagree that the other woman was owed an explanation of the timeline. A clarification that you were only involved during their break and that Austin really didn’t have the faintest clue about Cora until April. But a pang of possessiveness coursed through you as Austin was relaying the chain of events. You tried unsuccessfully to push it down.

“We did uh, makeout. But when she went for my shirt we both snapped out of it. And then she started freaking out asking if she’d just made me a cheater and I said not exactly, because we weren’t exclusive- the rest just kinda tumbled out.”

His retelling of that part in the voicemail had left with more questions than answers, mainly surrounding the three word slip that had felt like an anvil dangling over your heads since it had happened.

You swallowed thickly, forcing yourself to look at him. “So when you said what you said, on Facetime,”

“I meant it.” He started, clearing his throat. “It was the heat of the moment, yeah, but it only slipped out cause it was all I’d been thinking about since leaving you two at the airport. How different it felt to know I was coming back- good different.”

“Cora missed you like crazy, drove me nuts when I was still mad.”

It was a redirect, but you were starting to get overwhelmed and it tumbled out before you could convince yourself to just swallow your anxiety and push on. Not a good enough redirect though, not when Austin only focused on the last part.

“So you aren’t anymore? Mad, I mean.”

“Upset, a little jealous. Not mad.” You said, suprised by your own honesty.

Austin seemed to be too, pulling his eyebrows together.

“Jealous of what?”

Returning to the loose thread on your cardigan, you plucked at it aimlessly. “That if you wanted to get back with her it’d be easier. Less strings attached, nothing tying you down- less to lose it it didn’t work out.”

You realized you were rambling and stopped abruptly, the room was silent when you did save for the low buzz of the radiator.

Austin broke the silence first, running a hand down his face.

“I get that you’re looking out for Cora by keepin’ me at arms length here Y/N, a hundred percent I do. But I guess my thing is that don’t plan on going anywhere. And I want to be with you if that’s what you want too.”

I want that more than anything, you thought, but what came out of your mouth was the thing that had made that feel off limits permanently since April.

“If you hadn’t come back for Elvis, if we never ran into each other,” You said tightly, fidgeting with your hands. “You probably wouldn’t have ever known Cora existed unless she tried to find you on her own as a teenager or an adult. And I don’t understand how you could ever forgive me for that.”

You were embarrassed by how much your voice was shaking, really not wanting to cry and feeling dangerously close.

Austin sucked his bottom lip in and took a short breath before he spoke, voice gentle.

“I forgave you the minute I saw Cora when she came out of the hallway that first night. So little, lookin’ just like me. I understood instantly why you did what you did to protect her.” He started.

"And I think what you need to do now, Y/N, is forgive yourself. I would’ve loved to be involved sooner, but you weren’t keeping me away to be cruel. You were protecting our baby the best way you knew how, that’s it.”

Swallowing thickly, you looked down in an attempt to hide the tears you felt pooling. What you wanted to say was that you didn’t even know how to begin to do that. That every time Cora told you how much she missed him when he was gone for one night- or you watched her run to the door to greet him, guilt surged through you like a lightning bolt.

Not just over what Austin had missed out on either, but what Cora had too. And you knew somewhere in the back of your mind that you needed to forgive yourself before it ate you alive.

Hearing it out loud, from him, that's what put a lump in your throat.

Austin scooted a little closer, asking you softly to look at him as you swiped at your eyes.

You felt his hand on your knee when you lifted your head, the way he was massaging your leg about to do you in because God- you loved him.

But scared that you’d start crying in earnest if you tried to articulate even half of what you were thinking, you kissed him. And Austin kissed you back as you maneuvered over into his lap, hands sliding up your neck to your cheeks as he pulled away just enough to talk.

“I love you so much honey,” He whispered, rubbing his thumb against your jaw. "You know that?"

Tilting your head to the side to kiss his fingers where they were resting against your face, you gave a small nod. “I do.”

It was a couple hours later when you worked up the nerve to say a certain three words back, laying in bed tracing infinity loops over his shoulder blade with your index finger. You thought he was too close to sleep to hear it until you felt him stir, eyes fluttering open as he pulled you in a little closer by the arm he’d had wrapped around your torso.

It felt good to be love and be loved in return. You could get used to that.

---

July 22nd, 2020

Not a lot changed after that night, mostly because of the fact that you’d been acting like a couple from the second you ended your “not in a relationship” conversation anyways. But the little adjustments that did crop up were welcome.

Austin practically lived at your flat, only going to his when he had an obscenely early set call. The two of you sat Cora down a week in and explained to her in four year old terms that mommy and daddy were in a relationship, something she made sense of via proclaiming that the the two of you were just like Flynn and Rapunzel. Not that you minded the comparison. 

And on top of all that Austin got a new manager that couldn’t have been a sweeter woman. To the extent that she brought a little present for Cora the first time she came over to meet with the two of you together.

All in all things were going better than you ever imagined they could.

Save for the lingering anxiety in the back of your mind about what was going to happen when Elvis wrapped. You felt secure in the knowledge that Austin wasn’t going to up and ghost, but it regardless wasn’t a topic you could avoid broaching for much longer.

“Hey Aus?” You said on the drive to set one day, rubbing your thumb against his hand where he was holding yours over the console. He glanced over at you with a quirked eyebrow, and you looked at the road as you spoke.

“What are we going to do when Elvis wraps? Cora and I are both Australian citizens. And I hate asking you to uproot your life- but the thought of losing you all over again,”

You didn’t realize how anxious you really felt about it until that last part slipped out, Austin squeezing your hand as he pulled to a stoplight. 

“Do you think you’d wanna move to the U.S.? If you don’t wanna uproot Cora we can look at me movin’ here.”

He said it so casually, like he wasn’t suggesting he leave his entire life behind to move across the globe, and it went right at your heart. 

“I can’t ask you to do that. She’s still little, and sure visa shit would take time but I think she’d adjust okay.”

“Alright then, so we’re gonna figure this out, and no one is gonna lose anybody.” He replied with a smile as he raised your interlocked hands to kiss them before driving through the green light. “I promise.”

-

The conversation lingered in your mind all day at work, and still was after work when you met up with Leah for Chinese food. Immediately, and unsurprisingly, she noticed.

“You’re quiet.” She stated, looking at you over her work with a skeptical expression.

“I finally asked Austin about what we’re gonna do after filming wraps.”

“And?”

Twirling noodles around your fork, you glanced around to make sure you were mostly alone before you continued. “He offered to move here if I thought moving to the states would be too much for Cora. And I think she’ll be fine, I told him that.” 

“So are you lookin’ at getting a K1 visa?”

You almost spit your food out at that, Leah laughing at how wide your eyes got. It had come up in the research you’d starting during your break on set, but you made haste in scrolling past those results.

“We’ve haven’t even been together together for a full month, we’re not getting engaged Leah.”

She didn’t seem to take that for an answer, putting her fork down to prop her head up on her hands. “C’mon, do you really think there’s going to be anyone else?”

You knew what she was implying but you were quiet for too long and she rephrased the question anyways, tone a degree more serious.

“Do you think either of you are going to end up with someone else at this point? You’re planning on moving countries for him, moving Cora. I like to think I know you pretty well Y/N and you wouldn't be willing to sacrifice so much if you didn’t think Aus was your end game here.”

Picking her fork back up, she pointed it in your direction with the look she’d always given you when there was no point in arguing against whatever she was saying. Not that you had a particularly good argument, that in itself a realization that felt heavy.

“When you know you know, that’s all I’m saying.”

---

July 29th, 2020

Since the the dust settled between the paparazzi fallout and figuring your relationship out Cora had become a semi-regular visitor on the Elvis set whenever Baz gave the greenlight for it. She had Austin and just about everyone else wrapped around her finger, quickly becoming little miss popular among the cast and crew whenever she was around.

And it did your heart good to watch everyone take her under their wings, the fears you’d had about losing your job over the ‘scandal’ of it all feeling silly in hindsight.

On this particular day the two of you had opposing schedules, Austin leaving the day at two after an early morning call when you were just coming in to work lights for some casino scenes with Tom. You brought Cora with you to swap off, and give her some time to run around what had quickly become her favorite playground.

The last you saw after the switch she was fine and giggling on Austin’s shoulders as he showed her around the International Hotel set. So when you had a couple seconds to check your phone almost an hour after you parted ways, the text from twenty minutes prior that you were just seeing came with a bit of whiplash.

Hey, Cora threw up. Gonna take her back to yours once she seems okay enough for the car ride. DW about rushing home but call when you get a minute.

Well, you were worrying whether he wanted you to or not. And you were about to call when you heard footsteps coming towards you and looked up to a rather frantic production manager. She seemed to clock that you knew why she was there, running a hand through her hair.

“Been running around like a mad woman trying to find you, Austin’s on his way to parking lot B.”

You thanked her before taking off across the studio, spotting him getting into the drivers seat of his car as you reached the lot. Speeding up to a run so he didn’t drive off before you reached him, you managed to get there before he hit the gas.

“Hey, I’m so sorry- she was fine earlier, I wouldn’t have brought her to set if she was sick.” You rushed out as he rolled down the window, waving you off. “Kids puke baby, nothin’ to be sorry about.”

Your attention was pulled by sniffles before you cohort respond, Cora having spotted you from the backseat. Opening her door and crouching down, you were met with a four year old hiccuping through tears.

“Sick on daddy,” She whined, cheeks flushed.

“She threw up on you?

Turning towards the drivers seat you realized Austin didn’t have a shirt on under his hoodie. And you hoped that at least meant she hadn’t thrown up on the Elvis jumpsuit Austin had on when you first got to set.

“I was already outta costume,” He supplied with a little shrug, and you muttered a quiet “Thank you Jesus.”

Sighing as you stood back up, you reached into your back pocket for your phone as you spoke. “I can tell my supervisor what’s going on and he’ll let me go, he’s good about Cora.”

But Austin shook his head, reaching for your arm to stop you. “I got her, really.”

You met his eyes then, realizing suddenly why he was being so insistent about you staying at work. He’d been alone with Cora before. But the worst he’d had to do thus far was talk her down from the occasional tantrum. 

This was different, and you got the sense that he was treating it like some sort of parenting litmus test. And while you didn’t have any intentions of drilling his abilities as a father yourself, ever, you were touched by how adamant he was being about the whole thing.

So you put your phone back in your pocket with a soft “Okay”, giving Cora a goodbye with an assurance that you’d be home later before shutting her door.

When you popped back up to the driver's seat Austin leaned out of the car window for a kiss, promising he’d call if she got much worse.

Your phone buzzed only a couple minutes after you’d walked off, leaving them while he was still parked getting Cora calmed down because you had to get back to set.

Thank you for trusting me. Love you.

The message brought a smile to your face in spite of how shitty the situation was, and you shot back a Love you too. before put your phone on do not disturb. If Austin called it would come through anyhow, and you wanted to try your best not to helicopter text about Cora.

-

When you were leaving for the night and did check your phone you had a litany of notifications from Austin. And Cora being sick was far from ideal, but the live feed he’d been keeping you on via text was so sweet you found yourself laughing some under your breath.

No puking in the car, considering that a win.

Got her to keep a couple crackers down.

Nevermind. 😅

Outfit change #2 time (for me, not Cora bless her heart).

She threw up when she was laying in bed and missed the bowl. Put the dirty stuff in the washing machine but don’t know where you keep the spare bedding and don’t want to leave her alone to look too hard. Gonna set us up on the couch.

The next message came with a photo of the back of Cora’s head, blonde hair pulled into two braids that you didn’t think looked all that bad.

Asked me to do her hair after I gave her a bath, I did my best!

I hate knowing you’ve been doing this all by yourself all this time. You’re a super mom.

Cora hasn’t thrown up in a hot minute and says she’s feeling “less yucky” so we might be out of the woods. Think we’re both gonna be asleep by the time you get home though. I love you.

He’d assumed right by that, the sight that met you as walked into your flat the both of them asleep on the couch. Cora was curled up under Austin’s arm, her head resting against his neck with a hand on his face.

The sight was so sweet you snapped a photo before moving to wake them up. Which you felt a horrible about, but Austin couldn’t afford to screw up his back on your couch or get whatever Cora had come down with. Which it might’ve be too late to avoid given that she’d thrown up on him, and from what you’d assumed by his texts a second time at that. Better safe than sorry though.

He stirred when you scooped Cora up off of him, a flash of panic crossing his eyes before he realized it was you.

The husky “Oh, hi,” he gave you sounded absolutely exhausted, his eyes not even open all the way for a minute there.

“I’m gonna let her sleep in my bed,” You whispered over your daughter’s head as he sat up slowly. “And I hate to kick you out but I don’t want you to catch whatever she has.”

Austin stretched his back, waving you off as he turned back to face you. “‘s fine. I think it’s just food poisoning anyway, she didn’t have a fever or nothing.” 

“And if it’s the flu then Baz is gonna have my head for getting you sick.” You replied, knowing the argument was already lost.

He followed the two of you down the hallway, Cora waking up fully as you were laying her down in the middle of your bed. Opening her eyes, she gave a little tired smile when she saw you.

“Hi momma,” She said so quietly you almost didn’t hear her, and it was moments like this that you really understood what people said about your kids being your heart walking around outside of your body. Brushing a few hairs out of her eyes, you smiled softly.

“Hi Cor, you feelin’ a little better?”

She nodded at that, but pulled her gaze away from you to scan the dark room, sitting up some in your bed as you laid down next to her. Austin was across the room plugging his phone in, your bedroom too dark with the lights off for Cora to see where he went.

“Where’s daddy?” 

“Right here sweetie,” He said softly as he came back over, climbing into bed and pressing a kiss to her head as he laid down.

Cora ended up sandwiched between the two of you, her head knocked back on Austin’s chest with a foot nudged almost in your ribcage.

And Austin had a protective arm slung over the both of you, Leah’s words running through your head like a skipping CD as you tried to sleep.

“When you know you know, that’s all I’m saying.”

xxx

tag list (tags don’t always work, i do my best!): @chernayawidow @theinvisiblecapricorn @aalishifts @mavericksicybabe @cryingabtab @kittenlittle24 @invisiblee-smoke @mrs-munson-quinn @cevans-winchester @kikilovesdankmemes @oh-austin @chrissie-soula @starcatchxr @butlervol6 @thedeviltohisangel @redhoods-gf @gabrielajimenez @stlover288 @alqvarde @loudwombatmugkid @austinbrainrot @ab4eva @m0ndayagain @marlowmode @kingbouji3 @gardenavenue @yeonimii @eliseinmemphis @blurredcolour @tiddieshakeshownu @fallininlovewithurlove @briannaisanxious @amiets2 @karamelcoveredolicity @amnmichh @mrsniallhoran505 @strokesofstokes @starry-night-20

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Crown For Two {9}

Henry Cavill AU x OFC Xari Thornton

Warning: Mild Cursing, Cheesy Christmas Themes, Fluff, 

Words: 8.2k

Summary: Xari Thornton is a travel photographer with a blog and social media that garners some heavy-duty traffic. People tune in to see where she is and what she’s doing there, all in hopes of either living vicariously through her or to plan their next vacation.  

Her slogan: “Traveling the path to the most off-beaten places, so you don’t have to.”  

Her next stop on her four-destination travel itinerary of “Places You May Never Have Heard Of” is Sandvell, a small European country. When her plane makes an impromptu stop due to bad weather, she has no idea where she is. It feels like she’s stepped inside of a snow globe and back in time in a modern way. It leaves her fascinated.

This bad weather forces her to stay at an Inn, The Beaux, for the night. She explores and meets the friendly locals. One local in particular captures her lens with eyes as blue as the ocean and a jaw that was chiseled from stone. Once they separate, she gets herself into a harrowing situation.  

As soon as she awakens, she realizes she’s not in some fever dream, but a palace and the owner of the palace is none other than the local she met before with the piercing blue eyes, His Royal Highness Henry Wellington Leopold Danglishton, First of his name, Crown Prince of Brexendor.

Note: AND WE’RE BACK!!!  It’s December again which means we all need a cheesy Christmas romance. 😁 I know this has been gone for a long, long time and I am thankful for each of you who still care about it. As a reminder, it’s going to be fast-paced a bit, and I am gonna overload you with pictures because why the hell not, it’s a Christmas Fic. 😁 Feel free to come by and tell me what you guys think.

As always, thank you all for reading, I appreciate each and every one of you.

If you enjoyed this, please, LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG!!! ❤️❤️

***NOT Edited/Proofread***

***Interactive***

Previous Chapters: {1} | {2} | {3} | {4} | {5} | {6} | {7} | {8} | 

-Y/N-

“Hey you’ve reached Neka. I’m too busy living my life the way I want to and can’t be bothered to answer. Leave a message and I’ll call you back. If I want to.”

 You sighed hearing your sister’s very familiar voicemail message.

 “Aneka, it’s me. Where are you? I get this place is obscenely huge and there is plenty to explore but pick up the damn phone. Let me know you’re okay.”

 You ended the call and sighed again as you made sure you had everything in your purse. A few moments later, you stopped thinking again about going to this thing. Half of you was telling you it was a bad idea and that you should stay away from everything related to this country including its crown prince. However, the other side was traitorous and telling you to run carefree and live by the seat of your panties and take them off for said crown prince.

 What’s the worst that could happen? You recognized the question from the carefree and often diabolical devil on your shoulder.

 Humiliation and heartbreak are what. The words from the practical and cautious angel on the other side of your shoulder piped up.

 You stood there thinking about both sides for a few moments then continued putting items into your purse.

 Good girl, live a little, have some fun and get a few orgasms at the same time. Win/win. The devil was on a roll.

 It is all fun and games until you get your heart broken by an actual prince who has obligations to be with someone other than you.

 The angel’s words were like a gut punch. It was right.

 MSG Aneka: I’m sorry RiRi. I’m going to this thing in the park. You should come I hear it’s a lot of fun.

 Your sister never ceased to amaze you. She’d found out about the citizen’s Brexenavide on her own and was already in the thick of it. She had no problem going with the flow and having a good time when she saw it could be had. You sighed again, finally deciding to just do it. However, a few minutes after making the decision you scowled remembering who you’d be driving with.

 There was something about this Freddie girl that rubbed you the wrong way. Something about her that screamed she was not to be trusted and that included enough to be in the same car. You groaned because you’d long left high school and the petty turf wars of petty bitches behind. You were an adult now who had bills and obligations and checking a rich bitch wasn’t one of them. A smirk spread across your face as you came to the realization that you were happy to rise to the occasion though. After looking yourself over, you divided to change. While your current outfit was cute, one look outside said you needed something warmer.

 At that thought there was a knock at your door. When you opened it, you found a honey eyed member of the staff you recognized. She smiled and bowed her head slightly.

 “Ms. Xari. I come with a message from Princess Jemma.”

 Recognition hit you then, “Tamina, right?”

 She smiled wider and nodded, clearly delighted you remembered her.

 “Yes, ma’am.”

 “Come in, please.”

 “No need ma’am. This is from the princess. She wanted you to have it for the event today. Her direct message is to wear it and it will ensure no one will be able to take their eyes off of you.”

 What the hell did that mean? You reached out to Tamina and took the two garment bags that were lying across her forearms.

 “Thank you, Tamina. Please thank the princess.”

 Tamina bowed again before walking off. When you turned back into your room you staggered to the bed from the weight of the items in your arms and laid the bags across your bed. Unzipping the first one, your eyes widened at the sight of a chic, and beautiful outfit resting there. The items looked designer, and no doubt must have costed several thousand dollars. Your hand brushed against the shiny leather of the pants and instantly recognized it was high quality. It went perfect with the cropped knitted sweater that rested just atop it.

 You didn’t know how Jemma knew you were a sucker for leather pants, but you were busting at the seams to try them on. Every woman needed a great pair of leather pants that made their ass pop. You reached for the second bag and opened it and gasped. A plush fur coat that brought the whole thing together waited for you to touch it. You were so tempted, and that temptation proved to be too much. When your fingers entangled in the fur, you cooed. It was perfect. Leather and fur, how luxurious, you thought.

 When in Rome, or Brexendor. Live a little. The angel on your shoulder had a point. Within minutes, you’d peeled off your own clothing and changed into the ones sent by Jemma. Surprisingly they were a perfect fit. The moment you buttoned the pants you sighed. They were made for you. Once you’d pulled it all together, you stood in front of the full-length mirror in the room and surveyed your look from every angle. Every angle passed the test. You looked damn good. For the final test, you dropped down like you were doing the beat drop challenge and kept your eyes on your ass. A wide grin spread across your face.

 “Thank you, Jemma!”

 You hurried into the closet, remembering you’d already packed the perfect boots to wear with this outfit. When you’d packed, Aneka had made fun of you saying you were going to slip on a patch of ice and break your neck because of them. You didn’t bother telling her it would never happen because no one pays nearly nine hundred dollars for boots that were designed for cold weather in mind with the chance of said boots sending you to your death because they couldn’t hold up. You’d worn these two times before and they’d never failed you.

 Standing in front of the mirror again, this time in the knee-high fur heeled boots you smirked. Jemma’s words came to mind then.

 “Wear it and it will ensure no one will be able to take their eyes off of you.”

 You wondered if Henry would be among those who couldn’t keep their eyes off of you. Memories of the night before flooded your mind and within seconds you were frozen reminiscing of the way his hands felt against your skin, the scent of his breath as he moaned against your ear, the taste of his lips and the intensity in his eyes when his locked with yours. You had to put a hand out to stabilize yourself because the thought of his body pressing on top of yours made your knees buck

 With much effort, you pulled yourself back to reality. If you thought about him any longer you knew you’d be on edge all day which you guessed would be akin to torture. There was a nagging feeling inside of you that told you that you’d need to be alert today. After checking your make up once more, you grabbed your purse and phone then made your way downstairs. As you passed by the staff you stopped for small talk, inquiring about everyone’s health and thanking them for all they’d done for you thus far. Each of them looked surprised but more than happy to stop and chat with you.

 When you stepped outside into the entry roundabout of the palace, you saw a long line of cars waiting and plenty of bustling bodies still in preparing mode for the departure. You watched the dignitaries load in their cars and pull off one by one. From the looks of all this pomp and flair, you knew this event was much more than just meeting the citizens. Perhaps this was a test of some sorts. You saw the man who’d been introduced as the prime minister do a quick perimeter check, surveying the around area before he looked in your direction. You expected him to get into the car as normal, but he didn’t. Instead, he stared in your direction and the longer he did the more the hairs on the back of your neck stood like your entire being was trying to tell you something about the man.

 The feel of someone touching your left elbow startled you.

 “My apologies Lady Thornton,” said one of the palace butlers.

 “It’s all right.”

 “Your car.”

 His hand stretched to the left at a silver car with its door open and waiting. Through the window, you could see the woman who’d so eagerly offered herself and her car to get you to the event. You were under no false pretenses about her sincerity in doing so. There was something more to her supposedly kind offer. You weren’t in a hurry to find out just how much more but from the way you’d caught her looking at Henry the night of the ball you had your guesses. You allowed the butler to direct you to the car and see you inside.

 As soon as you sat, the woman across from you pasted a smile on her face. It was one of those basic instinct smiles, a smile that housed a thousand lies, and a thousand and one daggers.

 “Xari, darling!”

 Your eyes widened. It had been a while since you’d been around this level of fake.

 “Thank you offering to get me to the event,” you breached.

 She smiled wider, if that was possible then leaned closer and took your hand in hers. “No thank you needed, dear. I have always been keen on helping those less fortunate.”

 You heard the bells of a boxing match in your head. She’d started round one.

 “Wow, um--.”

 “What a cute outfit you’ve chosen for yourself. I worried your tastes would be too—tactless for what the Brexendor press are used to, but I am surprised to see tactlessness will be missing from the day, at least in your outfit.”

 You cocked your head to the side. How did she manage to make so many insults sound so pleasant? You stifled a snort because thanks to your upbringing you’d been forced to go through debutant classes where you learned everything from etiquette to the art of polite disrespect. It was a southern thing. Those classes had prepared you to deal with the southern aunties, upper class grandmothers and quite a few socialites who thought they were better than everyone else because they had a trust fund and a rotation of cars for every day of the week.

 You opened your mouth to speak but the door on the right of the car opened first. First it was your sister, Aneka who ducked inside and sat beside you, then Albee, the man with the pretty eyes from the ball who sat beside Freddie.

 “Aneka?”

 She looped her arm with yours and smiled. “I thought you’d left already?”

 “I was but I got—distracted,” she said coyly smiling at Albee who smirked right back.

 “What are you doing in my car, Albee? Though I know yours is far less luxurious than mine I am sure you have your own car,” Freddie cheeked.

 Albee didn’t look fazed in the least, instead he smirked and made himself more comfortable in his seat. “Freddie you are aware that we are the same rank, correct?”

 “Duchess Frederica,” she retorted through clenched teeth.

 Albee scoffed. “Freddie. We’re all friends here, no need for titles. Only those who feel themselves more important than you truly are need to lean on such trivial things.”

 Freddie glared at him with one brow raised.

 “Since you are offering transport, I humbly accept your offer. Driver, carry on.”

 Before Freddie could reply, the car took motion, and she didn’t look one bit happy about it. You and Aneka exchanged glances speaking through them as you usually did. You were tempted to bust out your secret language from when you were kids but didn’t want to come off as intentionally rude. This was a tit for tat game.

 “And who are you?”

 Freddie’s calculating eyes landed on Aneka, but she didn’t shrink back, Aneka instead raised her brow and put on a sugar sweet smile on her face.

 “Aneka, Xari’s sister.”

 Freddi’s eyebrow darted upward as she took both of you in. “So there are two less fortunate souls that need our charity.”

 “The only thing unfortunate is your dye job. Did you pay for that?”

 The fire in Freddie’s eyes sparked and you saw Aneka had struck a nerve. It was after all her specialty.

 “Oh don’t tease dear Freddie about her hair. She loves it more than Jesus and little children,” Albee teased.

 “Children are disgusting,” she added never taking her eyes off of Aneka.

 “Interesting. That is not what I recall you telling the queen just a few weeks ago. What was it? Oh, I do so love children and cannot wait until I can become a mother. I do believe it is my life’s purpose.”

 You couldn’t help but snort. Dipping your head to the side to hide in Aneka’s shoulder you snickered.

 “I knew I scented fake on you, but I didn’t know it was this much of it,” Aneka added.

 “Fake? Are we talking about fake as in your supposed Gucci shoes or perhaps that atrocity you call hair atop your head? That level of fake?”

 Aneka lunged forward but your hand across her chest like a theme park ride safety bar stopped her.

 “Ri, Aneka began but the look you gave her stopped any further words.

 “So your hair is a sore topic? Remember that before you even attempt to go toe to toe with me.”

 You could hear Aneka’s teeth grinding. You knew she had it in her to beat Freddie’s ass in record time then step out the car without so much as a scratch on her. However, this was not the place and definitely not the time. You didn’t want to offend the queen or the family especially with the level of hospitality they were currently showing you both.

 “Take it easy Freddie. We wouldn’t want a repeat of what happened two Christmases ago. I don’t think the gossip would die down so quickly this time,” Albee cautioned.

 The look Freddie gave him could have frozen anyone’s heart, but he didn’t look bothered at all. His smile was bright as he met the challenge of her icy gaze. It was clear that this was normal for the two of them. Either this was a huge scheme between them to dupe the newcomer or the two disliked each other.

 “Why am I not surprised that you have found yet another commoner to slum it with. Do you not have any sense of pride or self-worth? Do you not feel them beneath you?”

 Aneka made a move to lunge at Freddie again, but you held firmly to her and brought her attention to look out the window.

 “Tsk, Tsk Freddie. Where is your decorum? My sense of pride and worth were never in question. Yours however—I can after all say I have never had a lifelong pursuit of someone who didn’t want me in the slightest bit.”

 You tucked that bit of information away for when you were alone to dissect it. All conversation stopped and you pointed things out to Aneka. Everything you pointed out Albee took it upon himself to either explain or give backstory to. It was interesting the information he revealed about the country. It was clear from his voice he also loved his home. With every other sentence he spoke, Freddie had a snide remark for. Either it was something to make him look bad or to point out how out of bounds you were to even be here.

 Thankfully, the car pulled into the destination when it did because you were quickly approaching the limit to your acceptance and ability to turn the other cheek. You looked at all the things that were set up for this event. Off to the side where the path was fully paved, there were stations set up for snacks, drinks, souvenirs, pictures and a few other things such as arts and crafts. Across the massive open field there was plenty to do. The car rolled past a toboggan area where children and adults were already speeding down the steep slope having a fabulous time. There was even an ice-skating rink that looked like the perfect photo-op to showcase how picturesque this country really was. You caught sight of other stalls set up with games, even child and family friendly park rides and even animals for petting.

 “Wow, give me this over a ball any day,” Aneka said.

 Freddie scoffed, rolling her eyes, “Gauche,” she hissed.

 The car door opened but before Freddie could make a move you slammed it shut again and locked it. You’d had enough.

 “I have sat here this entire car ride and listened to your disrespect and belittlement of myself, and my sister and I let you get it all out because I know those who feel threatened the most always feel the need to wail and moan about it so their voices are the ones heard the loudest to distract from how insignificant they truly feel and are.”

 Freddie’s eyes blazed. She opened her mouth to speak but you continued, keeping your voice steady. “I wasn’t going to point out your insignificance, but I feel I must now. If you had any respect for yourself, your country and people you would shut your mouth and practice a little thing we call in America and by we, I mean women with mine and Aneka’s hair, call self-restraint and self-love. Because you would truly understand that you reflect upon your country and people. It is very telling of your low intelligence when all you can do is attempt to make others feel lowly about themselves because you put so much value on wealth. This holier than thou act will only lead to one thing in your life, shame and loneliness. Though I think you are fully aware of the loneliness part. You can’t make me feel bad about myself because I know my worth and it is astronomically higher than yours and we both know he sees that.”

 Freddie sputtered clearly trying to find the words for a comeback. You gave her a good five seconds to compute but even that wasn’t enough. Poor little Tink Tink, you thought as you unlocked the door. It opened as soon as you did like the driver had been trying the entire time. You didn’t wait for her to climb out you took the initiative and took the driver’s hand and climbed out of the car holding onto Aneka’s hand bringing her with you.

As soon as you stepped out of the car, you caught Henry’s eye. His brows were burrowed and there was a look of concern on his face. You gave him a polite smile and head nod as you rounded the car. Slowly, he brought his attention to the group of men before him. Albee stepped beside you then leaned close to your ear.

 “She has fangs,” he whispered.

 You smirked, “And my bite and bark are both deadly.”

 His smile widened as he tipped his invisible hat to you.

 “I like you,” Albee added as the line of dignitaries began moving. “And I can see why he likes you too.”

 His voice was lower this time, but it was his words that had you stumbling. Thanks to Aneka’s grip on your arm, it was barely noticeable. Thank goodness too because the press were hungrily snapping pictures of everyone and everything. You and the others stood to the side as Henry, the queen and Jemma shook hands and took the lead in the festivities. Your eyes couldn’t help but follow Henry as he shook the hands of several people while exchanging pleasantries. His smile was wide and the gleam in his eyes said he was genuinely happy to be there and interact with them all.

 When you saw him dip down to greet a few children, your ovaries practically exploded. The kids melted and in turn he did too. He played around with them as his mother and sister took over with greeting the adults. The more you watched the more your heart thumped thinking how adorable he looked.

 “Romancing the daughters of the dignitaries, Duke Baldrik?”

 Your attention turned to a photog standing in front of the three of you snapping pictures. The bright lights blinded you momentarily making you bring your hand to shield your face.

 “Ha, not at all, Albee replied with a bachelor perfect smile.

 “They look unfamiliar. Who might they be?”

 “Honored guests of the crown,” Albee offered holding out his arms for both you and Aneka to take. Once you did, he tipped his head to the photog and began ushering you toward the stalls that were set up.

 “Enjoy the event,” Albee called out.

 As soon as he was out of earshot, he blew out. “While the press here is not entirely as bad as it is in America, I do have to caution you. Do not underestimate them.”

 “Thank you,” Aneka said with a flirtatious smile.

 If was clear now that she was into him. Of course, she was, you thought. Aneka liked them pretty.

 “My pleasure. The longer you are here the more you will be able to figure out which ones prefer some scandal on top of their news and who truly have the crown’s best interest at heart. Him—scandal fattens his pockets.”

 You scanned the photographer from before who was now snapping pictures of Freddie who was now with two other women who looked just as stuck up as she did. She looked to be loving the attention and the compliments she was getting from everyone around her. Figured. Rolling your eyes, you turned your back on her.

 “Are you not afraid?”

 “Afraid of what?”

 “The power she wields.”

 “Call me dense because I know nothing of her power. All I see is a sad little bitch.”

 Albee snorted and heartily laughed bringing the attention of most around you, even Henry.

 “My goodness. You are a breath of fresh air. Would you like me to enlighten you of her power, or the power of her name?”

 You looked at a few figurines at the stall smiling at how cute they were.

 “Nah, I don’t care.”

 “I do. Know thy enemy, Art of War, Sun Tzu,” Aneka butt in.

 Albee’s smile widened. “I do think I am going to enjoy this season.”

 As the three of you walked around taking in the many activities, that had been prepared Albee told you all about Freddie and her family. He didn’t leave much out including her net worth and the influence her family had in the past. When he told you about her lifetime hope and dream of becoming the queen, you almost laughed. Of course she wanted to be queen. She was clearly obsessed with power and wanted the second highest position in the country. However, when Albee revealed that Henry didn’t seem to be keen on that idea you couldn’t keep a smile off your face. It was short lived though, because it dawned on you then that you’d stepped right into another season of “The Bachelor: Who Wants the Crown”. Rich women would fight to their last press on nail for more money and more power and it was even better if it came with a crown and a pretty hot prince.

 From the look Aneka gave you, she was thinking the same thing. You tentatively listened as Albee pointed out the who was who of the group all with backstory. He was clearly well informed from growing up within all of this but firm the way he spoke about the rest of them in comparison to Henry you could tell he harbored no ill will toward him. Perhaps there really were some good people besides the queen and Jemma after all.

 Fo the next few hours you, Aneka and Albee explored the park flitting from game to game and stall to stall. Every few seconds you were snapping pictures trying to capture the joy and liveliness that was all around you. Everyone was so friendly you couldn’t help but feel right at home among them. Kids easily approached you to play and sing and show you the ropes of a few local games. Grandmothers with kind eyes happily shared stories and happy memories of previous Brexenavides while offering local delicacies like candied nuts that came in a plethora of flavors that you quickly became addicted to.

 Before you knew it, you’d wandered off by yourself with no sight of Aneka or Albee. You wondered if it was purposely done so she could get some alone time with him. Deciding not to go find them, you wandered the area some more until you felt a snowball hit your back. Expecting to see a child, you spun around but found Henry with the evidence on his leather gloves. Your jaw dropped.

 “Your highness,” you gasped.

 His laugh echoed around you as he approached you.

 “Forgive me my lady.”

 “There goes that title again. I’m no lady.”

 Henry took you in for a few moments. “I beg to differ. I have always seen a lady as one who is refined, polite and well spoken, someone who makes those around them feel valued.”

 “And that is me?”

 “Yes. Since you’ve arrived, I have overheard many of the maids talking about your kindness to them how you never make them feel less than and how you are always polite, stopping to talk to them as if you care about their feelings.”

 “And I take it that is something out of character in Brexendor.”

 Henry took a deep breath. “Among my family not at all, but when the palace gets filled with dignitaries and other world leaders, I am ashamed to say yes.”

 You nodded and popped a few more candied nuts into your mouth. You tipped the bag toward him.

 “Are those what I think they are?”

 He dipped inside and came away with a small handful that he tossed into his mouth. The moan he let out was deep and it took you right back to the night before. Goosebumps skirted across your skin making you stand taller as a shiver ran through you.

 “Are you cold?”

 “Uh—no. I’m all right.”

 “I am sorry I got carried away. These have always been my favorite. I remember the first outing my father took me to. He knew I was not looking forward to it and that I was anxious about making a good impression on him and the family. Once I got into the car, he had a bag of these waiting for me. As we drove, we talked about sports, video games and my tutor who I mightily disliked. We ate the whole bag within minutes and by the time we got to the appearance all of my nerves had wilted away. Every outing I went on whether it was with him or without there was a bag of these waiting for me.”

 The smile on his face was so warm but it was also sorrowful.

 “That’s beautiful.”

 He nodded popping another one into his mouth. “Then he died and since—I haven’t had not even one.”

 The sadness rolling off of him touched your heart. You wanted to wrap your arms around him and tell him everything was going to be all right. You wanted to comfort him in a way that this open space did not permit. You glanced around and caught sight of the toboggan area.

 “How good are you at toboggan?”

 Henry scoffed the dusted off his hands. “I am the toboggan king.”

 You giggled and rolled your eyes. “Put your money where your mouth is, your highness.”

 “Money? Are we betting?”

 “Bet your ass we are.”

 “My ass? My, my Lady Thornton, how forward you are to think that is up for grabs.”

 The look he gave you was a steamy one.

 “Is there something else that should be up for grabs, your highness? Perhaps something—harder to—accomplish—something bigger?”

 Heat flashed behind his icicle blue orbs as he held your gaze. Henry took a step to you then another. With clenched jaws, he sighed.

 “Winner makes the request?”

 “Wager accepted.”

 The two of you walked over to the toboggan areas. As soon as you approached those around marveled at having him so close. It didn’t matter their age they were all captivated by him. To have that much power, you thought. How was he not some self-absorbed asshole?

“After you,” Henry offered, holding his hand out to an empty toboggan. You smirked then climbed on taking care to use your long jacket to pool between your legs so there would be no unsavory photos later.

 Once you were comfortable, you glanced to your left, he was seated in his own toboggan ready and waiting with a boyish excited smile on his face. You wondered when the last time was that he’d smiled like that.

 “Last chance to back out Lady Thornton.”

 You playfully rolled your eyes. “A lady never goes back on a wager. Are you sure you don’t want to forfeit before you lose terribly in front of your citizens? A true king knows when he is in over his head.”

 Henry laughed loudly again and everyone around him giggled clearly catching his excited joy.

 “That is true, but I assure you my lady, this is not one of those times.”

 You smiled and focused in front of you. Someone off to the side began counting down from four and when you shouted one a pair of strong hands gave you one push sending you down the steep hill. You’d underestimated the hill greatly and your scream said so. Henry laughed then leaned backward. You watched him inch before you, leading by almost a foot. You did the same and smiled when you cut his lead by a few inches. With the bottom of the hill in sight, you needed a last-ditch effort to come out on top. Not knowing if it would work or not, you rocked back and forth hoping it would increase your speed. Instead, it made the toboggan choppy.

 All too late, you saw the fist sized rock in front of you. However, it was too late. The slate of the toboggan nudged it sending the back of it forward and you sailing through the air. It all happened in slow motion, and you fully caught sight of Henry coasting into the finish line and to a stop. He stood and held his hands in the air in triumph, but that excitement faded when he saw your current state. You heard him shout your name then come barreling toward you. You braced yourself for the hard impact you knew was coming and tried to prepare for the face full of snow you were about to ingest. When you felt the hard collision, it knocked the wind out of your lungs. You rolled a few times but barely felt any pain.

 Finally, when you came to a stop, it took several moments to open your eyes. Atop you was Henry with his face mere inches from yours. For a few seconds, you thought you’d transported back in time, and you were in the garden room with him again. The patches of snow in his hair slowly registered as did the fact that he was calling your name with his hands on your cheek.

“Xari.”

 “Did I win?”

 Henry’s features softened as he gave you a half smile.

 “Not even close.”

 You giggled at first, but it got louder and more uncontrolled. Henry joined in neither of you fully registering that you were not alone and in fact in front of dozens of people. Feet stamped to you, and you turned your face shielding it from the patches of snow.

 “Your highness, are you all right?”

 Reality was colder than the snow you laid upon.

 “Ehm, yes. I am quite all right,” Henry said as he stood. “Just doing the right thing and saving the damsel in distress.”

 You snorted as you took his outstretched hand and allowed him to pull you up. “I suppose I earned that title. Thank you, your highness.”

 Henry nodded, bowing his head ever so slightly. “A pleasure, Lady Thronton.”

 “This way your highness,” Henry’s advisor breached directing the way.

 As he walked off you took note of Freddie and her friends standing off to the side watching you. The look on all their faces told you that you were now on their radar. A few more hours passed, and you took the time to get to every ride and activity. You wanted to experience it all so you could really write about it later. This event was definitely a must for any visitors during this time of year.

 When you ducked into a photo booth, you sighed out taking the time to catch your breath and give your feet a break. Before you could get too comfortable, another body ducked in beside you.

 “Ex--.”

 Henry’s smiling face stopped you.

 “Fancy meeting you here.”

 You snorted and shook your head.

 “Shouldn’t you be working?”

 “Funny thing. I came here fully prepared to work but knowing you are here only makes me want to experience this with you—through your eyes.”

 You searched his then smirked.

 “So, you’re—hiding out?”

 He nodded and you had to laugh then. “Oh, your highness.”

 “Every time you say that it sounds so dirty, and it brings my head to very ungentlemanly things.”

 You leaned forward and began making selections for the pictures.

 “Is that so?”

 “Quite so. Is it intentional on your part?”

 Shrugging, you looked at him.

 “I have no idea what you’re talking about, your highness.”

 His eyes dropped to your lips and within seconds he pulled you flush against his lips at the same time the flash of the camera went off. You both moaned neither pulling away, both intensifying the kiss. His tongue curled around yours making you wrap your arms around his neck at the same time he brought his hand to the back of your neck. He held you tenderly like you were precious but firm not wanting you to slip away. When you came in here, you hadn’t planned on this being a make out spot but now you couldn’t care less about the pictures.  

 His lips were sweet but cold and his tongue warm and intoxicating. Somehow, he tasted like peppermint and chocolate, and it was now your new favorite flavor combination. Needing to be closer, you sank your fingers into his tresses and gripped. The guttural moan he let out reverberated all over you, hardening your nipples and moistening your underwear.

 “Mm, I can kiss you all day every day and never tire of your lips,” Henry whispered.

 “All day? However will you get any work done?”

 He smiled then kissed you again nibbling your bottom lip.

 “I guess I shall not.”

 Your eyes met and you saw the truth of his words. How sweet, you thought before you traced your tongue along his bottom lip then his top carefully outlining his perfect cupid’s bow. He didn’t move an inch. When his eyes fluttered closed giving you the most amazing angle of his long lashes, you softly sighed. Henry then claimed your lips pulling you closer to him so your bodies melded together becoming one figure. His lips hungrily kissed you, nibbling, sucking, licking as he pleased not caring where you were or who could happen upon you at any moment.

 “Eh-em, your highness incoming. Duchess Freddie.”

 McArthur’s voice broke the lustful haze surrounding you forcing you both to reluctantly pull away. Henry groaned his displeasure then glanced behind you.

 “I think I have worked enough today. Care to join me on a personalized tour?”

 You smiled brightly then took his head. “As you wish.”

 “A low growl escaped him, and it sent your heart fluttering ten times as fast. “I do hope you remember those words when I most need them.”

 His grin was mischievous, and you made a note to say them again. The list of words and phrases that elicited a sultry reaction was steadily growing and you planned on monopolizing him at every chance. Henry stood and led you out the other entrance to the booth that was opposite where McArthur must have been standing. His steps were quick as he dashed away like it was the scene of a crime. Perhaps it was seeing how you were now wet and wanting him. When he pulled you through a clearing of pine trees, you squealed, your sense of adventure and excitement picking up.

 Once secluded behind the trees, he backed you into a mass of them tucking you in the tight crevice there then kissed you again. You eagerly accepted the kiss. He felt too sublime against you not to. His lips dipped to your jaw then trailed to your neck where it was clear he was a man with a plan.

 Henry groaned on your neck then nibbled your earlobe, “What are you doing to me, Xari? How have you taken every single brain cell I have and imprinted your face upon them? How have you touched my skin and made it impossible for me to see anyone else doing it? How have you come here and tortured me so?”

 You could hear the yearning in his voice. It was overwhelming, making you want to give in completely to him no matter the consequences. You were speechless. sensing this, he placed a chaste kiss at the tip of your nose then took your hand again and led you through the maze of trees. When you emerged, you saw the spread of rides before you just waiting for you both to let loose like children. McArthur stood just at the large Birch a few feet away with his back turned to you.

 “Your highness, the queen said she can manage the rest of the event with the dignitaries and the press and princess Jemma said she will take point with the children and citizens. They are both instructing you to play the role of the proper host to out palace guest,” McArthur informed.

 You pinched your lips. You knew what a set up sounded like. You couldn’t help but wonder why they were seemingly pushing him to entertain you. Before you could think any further, Henry looped your arm through his and led you across the field. McArthur handed Henry a newsboy hat and a dark scarf to replace his royal blue one he was currently wearing. Once he was disguised, you scoffed because while it gave him a little more coverage you were sure his people knew him thoroughly and would easily spot you. McArthur handed you a large wide brimmed hat that gave you full coverage from every angle.

 “To protect your privacy, Lady Thornton,” McArthur clarified.

 You smiled as you put it on. “Thank you, McArthur.

 A few minutes later you were seated in a ride called Santa’s Sleigh which was similar to those back and forth rocking pirate ships only it was led by the reindeers with Santa in the back.

 “Feel free to scream your highness, I will allow everyone to think it is me.”

 “I do not scream Lady Thornton, however, if you make it worth my while I will be the loudest in the land.”

 You giggled and enjoyed the ride teasing him the entire time. Your interaction was so natural it almost felt unreal. Though he didn’t touch you above your waist, his thigh remained pressed to yours no matter what. By the fourth ride, you’d deduced it was purposely done. Knowing that you couldn’t stop your heart from fluttering.  Ride after ride you laughed, joked and teased one another. Ride after ride he made sure to keep some part of your bodies touching. Ride after ride you exchanged flirtatious glances that only increased your body temperature. It may have been twenty or so degrees out, but you were a sweltering ninety-nine degrees.

 “This is your favorite ride?”

 Henry’s questioning eyes were glued to the carousel that was decked with reindeers, sacks of Santa’s presents, giant boulder like forms of coal, Santa’s mailbox and other notable Christmas decorations. The sun had now set and the lights that bathed the ride made it seem so magical. This entire country was plotting against you here, you thought to yourself.

 “Sure is.”

 “Then, shall we?”

Like a six your old child rather than a grown ass woman, you scampered toward the ride then walked around it trying to decide the best figurine. It was a tough choice, but you ended up picking a reindeer which had Henry choosing the same one beside yours. Before he climbed on, he took the time to carefully buckle you into the harness tightening the straps as needed. As he did so, his hands touched your waist and hips and from the look on his face you knew this too was purposely done.

 “Be careful your highness. You are very close to alerting the outside world to just how horny you are.”

 The smirk he wore slipped and his brows furrowed.

 “Is that what you think I am?”

 His voice was tight btu other than that it gave nothing away.

 “Um—isn’t it true?”

 His jaw clenched and a scowl fell across his lips. Backing away, he claimed onto his own reindeer but didn’t bother buckling the straps. A cold breeze engulfed you making you feel the bitter coldness for the first time. Had you said something wrong?

 The carousel went round and round sending you and Henry up and down, but he didn’t speak at any point. Instead, he held onto the pole while staring off into the distance. You allowed the silence to stretch for a few moments then when you turned to speak to him, you found his eyes already on you.

 “Something wrong?”

 Henry opened his mouth to speak but shook his head instead. You didn’t believe him. He definitely had something to say but you didn’t push him.

 “Why is the carousel your favorite ride?”

 You smirked then shook your head. “It just is.”

 “Even if it was not obvious you were lying, I would not believe that. Come on tell me.”

 “You won’t laugh?”

 “I might.”

 You narrowed your eyes at him, but your look was met with a hearty chuckle.

 “Come on tell me.”

 Hugging the pole of the reindeer tighter, you rested the side of your head on it, looking at him. “When I was about 8, I always saw it when looked so—pretty. It was usually the only ride that looked so—magical no matter what time of day or where I went. My father told me that it was a portal to a magical world. He said there was always one sometimes two chosen figures that were spelled to open the portal but only those destined to find it could. So, whenever I saw a carousel, I made it a point to ride it hoping to find the right figure to unlock the portal and take me away.”

 The smile Henry wore was an adoring one. “That may be the cutest image ever. An 8-year-old you climbing onto these things hoping it opened a portal to another world.”

 You nodded. “My parents indulged me, I was lucky. As I got older, I grew out of the heavy belief there was a magical portal and began to see how beautiful and romantic carousels were and went to realizing that perhaps they were magical after all, but not because of going to another world but how they made you feel and the memories you could make with those who matter while on them.”

 You hadn’t meant to spill so much to him. Glancing at him, you tried not to cringe realizing his eyes were glued to you. However, the longer he stared at you the more you felt like jumping off the ride and running back to the maze of trees.

 “So how many memories have you made with those who matter on one of these?”

 You smirked then shrugged. “One or two.”

 His huff made you pinch your lips in an effort to not laugh. “Interesting.”

 Making your best innocent face, you turned the question back onto him. “

 “And you?”

 “I feel like you are the one who will laugh at me here.”

 “Why?”

 “Because this—this is the first carousel I have ridden with anyone—leisurely, well that was not family that is.

Your eyes widened. “Ever?”

 “Ever.”

 “Oh my goodness, Henry—am I your first?”

 His smile was mischievous. “It would appear so, Lady Thornton.”

 You bit your bottom lip then smiled widely. You didn’t know why you felt so prideful. It wasn’t like it was something that mattered or something that reflected on you in any possible way.

 “Well, you are my first prince in a magical fairytale country that I’ve been on one of these with,” you began pausing to contemplate if you should say the rest of the sentence.  “And this just may be my favorite ever.”

 His cheeks flamed and you couldn’t help but smile. Then when his smile stretched bigger than you’d seen, your heart couldn’t bare it. He was too damn cute.

 “Mine too,” Henry muttered a little above a whisper knowing that you’d catch it.

 If cloud nine was the highest point one’s spirit could reach you were ebbing onto cloud 10. There was no need to speak for the rest of the ride. You and Henry rode it once, then twice but neither of you seemed quite ready to get off. After a fourth go round, the two of you walked around the park taking in the different games and events that were scattered about. You’d wanted to try the skating rink but didn’t want to expose him to the eyes of everyone around due to the openness of the rink, so you opted for other lowkey options for entertainment. You chatted about a plethora of things never remining on any subject long because you had so much in common that always branched out to other topics.

When you saw the actual reindeers, you lost it and scurried over to pet and baby talk them. While they were massive, you couldn’t help but find them adorable. You fed one a carrot and squealed at how affectionate it was. When you turned to make a puppy face at Henry, you found him snapping pictures of you with his phone like it was the most natural thing in the world.

 At the urging of the reindeer master, you climbed into the sleigh that was decked out as if it truly were Santa’s sleigh and posed for the professional photos. As they snapped away you looked to Henry trying to coax him into the sleigh with you. It didn’t take long before he climbed in and smiled for the pictures with you. It felt normal to do this with him, normal to be around one another like this. A massive bubble in your chest screamed of caution and reservation so loudly that your head had no other choice but to register the warning.

 After a few more photos, McArthur motioned for Henry’s attention which had him jumping out of the sleigh and stepping off to the side where both of them spoke in hushed tones. You prepared to climb down from the sleigh but as you did you happened to glance off to the right where you saw Freddie watching you. The rage and hatred in her eyes could not be missed and for a second you panicked. When you saw her raise a gun in her hand, your eyes widened. Before you could make a noise or move, a loud “pop” echoed through the park. You fully expected to feel the pain of the bullet and braced yourself, unable to move.

 Instead, the pain never came. What did unfold was pure chaos. Several loud “neighs” boomed through the air then a forceful jerk. The action sent you hurling backward landing in a crumped heap on the seat of the sleigh. There were screams in the park and you watched the reindeers panic, colliding with each other as if they were fighting. Antlers thwacked together making it sound as if trees themselves were splintering around you. Henry made a move toward the sleigh but was stopped by his protective detail that was now circling him and locking him down, ready to take any stray bullet for him.

 Within seconds, the reindeer that was harnessed to the sleigh you were in took off.

 “Aaaaaaaaaaah!”

 With terror, you watched as the unmanned runaway sleigh bound across the park not caring where it went. Everywhere people dashed out of its way trying to save themselves. All you could do was watch from your scrunched position, holding on for dear life as you prayed this was not how you died.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TagList:

@caramara3 @chaneajoyyy @caplover22 @queenoftheworldisdead @liquorlaughslove @shinebrightlikeafanbase @night-of-the-living-shred @dangerouslovefanfic @areubeingserved @maxcullen @jovanaprime @pananegra @bakarilennox @littlepreciousangel @shar74nett @pananegra @laketaj24 @blackgurlkillinit @maeleeme @live-laugh-love-ki @mary-ann84   @mery-be​ @sonjashuterbugjohnson​

@jamesbarnesappreciationclub @momobaby227 @naturalthrone22 @emjayewrites @kikimiyazaki @minton131 @aar-journey @sincerelyglowing @theonewithherheadintheclouds @livinglifeformemyselfandi @kittykatlow @mauvecherie @give-me-a-million-dollars-pls @angrybirdcr @winchwm @alyxkbrl @rn7rocks @thesecretlifeofdaydreams

@simply-heaven @winchwm @maximumninjavoid @offrostandstarlight @angrybirdcr @maxcullen  @xsweetdellzx @sausagefest1996 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @bellaamor88 @alyxkbrl @hello-therree @mery-be @that-chick212 @smuttywriter @ljstraightnochaser

@mrsbarnes-rogers @melanicia @live-laugh-love-ki @deadpixie22 @asiaaisa77 @queenshikongo3 @queenreignssupreme @cltex84 @helenasmirkedno @areubeingserved  @petty-bitch-akira @rynabarnesrogers-reading @themeforanudebeach @i-just-like-fanfics

@october505 @msblkfire84 @msbrightsidestuff @youremysuperstar @storiestoldbyjazz @themeforanudebeach @i-just-like-fanfics @titty-teetee       @wellthirsted @t3mporaa @jd-now-jq @libbymouse @queen-zelieonna    @abschaffer2 @omg-mymelaninisbeautiful @ramp-it-up  @kianya-loves @cutiebubbleboo @koko-michelle @keytodespair @ficsfordays  

@littlebvbie @pricklypear 

[writerman]

“YOU DID WHAT?!”

This was for an old writing prompt which I totally forgot about and I am responding to now!

Sorry for the wait, friend. -----

The shriek down the phone had Garrett pulling the device from his ear jerking back as though he could escape the unholy sound coming from the speaker.

Yes, he was half expecting such a reaction but still, it did surprise him. He'd had no idea Aro would feel so intensely about such a general thing but here he was being completely wrong, yet again.

After he was sure Aro wouldn't yell again, he placed the phone back to his ear and sighed heavily all the while looking down at the barbering scissors lying in the bathroom sink with a lot of strands of hair curled innocently on the white porcelain.

Cutting his hair was not a big deal... or at least until this phone call, that was what he had so naively assumed.

"When you see it it will be fine, it was just getting too long, that's all." It was strange that he sounded so unsure as he spoke, he knew he had cut his own hair. He had been there when he did it when he picked up the scissors and went snip snip!

"YOU DID WHAT?!" Aro cried down the phone, the noise in the background sounded like the frantic search for keys before an engine roared to life and the screech of tires on asphalt near drowned out his next words. "You cut your hair yourself?!" This man was wracked with an obscene amount of hysteria over a rather mundane act.

"Yeah, I do it all the time." Wrong thing to say, a dramatic sob was his only response before Aro's voice returned to him, though it was quiet almost timid and fearful.

"How short is it?" Obviously, the thought of Garrett cutting his own hair had conjured up images of buzzcuts which was as far from the truth as it could possibly be.

But this was all rather too much seeing as it wasn't even Aro's hair that had been trimmed and in any case, Garrett's sister Jill had been on Facetime with him the entire time so if he was going a bit too far she'd have mentioned it.

"I don't think you can really tell I even trimmed it, I might take a few more inches off." This was said more as an afterthought and more to himself, what it was not, was words of comfort to his fiance.

"Oh, I see, well I suppose I can have a look at it when I get home." The pace at which Aro's panic had subsided into nonchalance was honestly terrifying and judging by the sound of the engine he had slowed down the speed of his vehicle substantially.

"Hm, you can put your dreams of NASCAR behind you now that you're fine with my home haircut?" There was an unimpressed huff before the call disconnected.

Garrett grinned at his phone for a second before moving to tidy the bathroom sink. If there was one thing Aro hated more than home haircuts, which was news to Garrett, it was hair in the sink.

He didn't want to incur the wrath of his partner twice in one day so busied himself with that until Aro lurched through the front door because, of course, he had riled himself up into a panic once again on the drive home.

When he set eyes on Garrett's hair looking almost untouched just a tad bit shorter he looked relieved but did not comment on the haircut at all as he removed his coat and tossed his keys onto the kitchen counter.

"Well, any comment?" Garrett did a slow turn but when he faced Aro again he was greeted with a glower rather than relief or indifference.

"I got a speeding ticket because of you."

[totally-not-deacon]

WIP Wednesday, baby!

Tagged by @throughtrialbyfire!! Gonna tag some fresh meat I haven't gotten to yet: let's go with... @watchyourdigits @sassenashsworld aaaand @obscene-beans if ya wanna go.

So I'm at a point where there's a LOT of spoiler-y type stuff, so I had to root around a bit. Fortunately my brain refuses to write in order, so I have a fairly long little draft of a scene between Marasa and Inigo planned for a later chapter! Most'll be under the read more:

I’m sorry, I don’t speak ‘knuckle dragger’. Could you repeat that?” Marasa’s chair slammed into the wall behind her as she shot to her feet. If this son of a bitch thought he could pull that on her…

“Easy, now.” Inigo’s hand came to rest on her arm. She glared up at the now smug-looking Nord in question, before she let herself be pulled away. One more word.

“He’s just some drunk snowback, I could take him down, no problem!” She slurred, easily just as inebriated, while tugging futilely in his grasp. Inigo nodded to Lucien on the way out, sure he’d let the others know where they were off to. So maybe he had a plan in case this happened, even ready to rent rooms elsewhere. They weren’t going to tell her that, of course.

“While I am sure you could, and I might otherwise encourage putting a racist in his place, we are in Windhelm.” He walked them through the crowd and into the frigid night air. “Why don’t we visit that corner club instead, before we end up visiting a cell.”

She deflated, sagging against him. Her breath formed soft clouds in the cold night air. “I hate this city.”

“As do I, but we are only here for the night. These people are not worth sitting in jail over, believe me.” They wound through the ice-slicked alleys, working their way back to the Gray Quarter. Footsteps echoed off the ancient stone walls making up the city, cutting through the silence. He was right, he usually was. He nudged her through the door first, the burst of heat welcome on her chilled skin.

She wasn’t too keen on this Dunmeri alcohol, but she nursed her drink all the same. There wasn’t anything she could think of to say, so she remained silent and scowling at the tabletop.

“How are you doing?”

“I…” The question caught her off guard, eyes meeting his. Her mouth hung open. How was she doing? What she was doing, sure, maybe even why sometimes. She could answer those. But how… “I – I don’t know.”

“You have been through a lot recently. I do not blame you.”

Her frown deepened. How was he always so… understanding? It frustrated her to no end. Just... how did he do it? A tiny part of her wanted to reach out – to crawl from her own throat, thrashing and screaming to the world. She swallowed, feeling it growing.

“It’s just…” She should keep her mouth shut. “A year ago I was just another broke sellsword. Just another someone trying to run from themselves, right? I was alive, but that’s it. I just was. And I was okay with that, I think. But now…” Stop talking.

“Now, what?” He asked gently, encouraging her to finally begin to open up. He knew she needed to, it wasn’t healthy for anyone to bottle their emotions up so, and she was certainly an expert at it.

“I don’t –” She could feel her face heat up, her eyes begin to sting. It didn’t make any sense. Marasa buried her face in her hands. It was ungrateful, undeserving. She wanted it all at arm’s length and a tight embrace. Fingernails bit into her palms. “I don’t know what to do with it all!”

“All I’ve ever done is follow orders.” She continued, her mouth moving before she could think to stop it. “That’s all I’ve ever done – and now this? I’m supposed to be some kind of leader?An icon to a people that would rather see my kind slaughtered wholesale!”

They wanted her to be a hero.

She wasn’t. She never was. “I thought I was getting better. Or at least learning to ignore it…”

“And then…” Her voice wavered. The bite of shackles, the damp stone walls. She rubbed her wrists subconsciously, unable to actually say it aloud. The bruises may have faded, but the wounds inside still lay open and festering. She thought she was going to be sick. “And then everything came back.”

Inigo opened his mouth to respond, but she was on a roll. “But at the same time I have all of you. I have a house – an actual house! I’ve got friends…” More. She choked. “And I don’t feel like I earned a single bit of it.”

I shouldn’t even be here.

“My friend…”

Her voice lowered, alcohol blending the edges of the words together. “Half the reason I don’t go home, y’know. Did you know how proud my father was? When they shipped us off to Auridon… Did you know he congratulated me? Do I look like someone to be proud of? Look at me!”

“It feels like they wanted this, sometimes.” She hugged herself to the point it hurt. “They wanted a hero in the family more than a daughter.”

An arm wrapped around her shoulder, drawing her into a hug. She sighed, letting her head drop froward. “Sorry. Dunno where all that came from…”

“Do not be sorry. Every one deserves to have their voice heard.” Inigo assured her.

“Would you like to know what I see?” Marasa shrugged, no longer trusting her voice. She’d said enough already.

“I don’t see a hero.” Despite her own feelings of the term, it would still somehow sting from anyone else. “And I see that you are very scared. You are scared, and like a cornered animal – sometimes you lash out.”

“Way to cheer a girl up…” she mumbled.

“And I see someone still standing despite it all.” He continued. “I do not see a hero, but I do see a strong, courageous, and incredible friend.”

“So cheesy…” A small smile played on her face and she elbowed him in the side. She sniffed, quickly scrubbing at her eyes.

“No, that would be your pack after visiting the market this morning.”

[purveyorofsnozzberries]

So, let’s talk about anti-depressants for a bit.

Tw: suicide, depression, and SSRI withdrawal symptoms.

Antidepressants are wonderful miracles of modern medicine. In that we don’t really know how they work.

In 2016, my life sucked. I could go into how bad it sucked, but ironically I feel like that way lies a depressive episode so let’s not. One day, I received some unusually bad news. Life ending bad, it felt at the time. And, in the wake of that news, I tried to commit suicide. I thankfully was not well equipped, or I would have actually done some damage. I was lucky. I had a support system who sprang into action to let me know that I was loved, and would be missed.

So I started taking antidepressants. I went to a doctor and said “I tried to off myself, I think I need antidepressants.” They readily agreed, and I was prescribed escitalopram. Years have passed, I’ve had my ups and downs but for the most part the antidepressants did a lot to help me stay sane during those bad years. Hurray!

But then, a few months ago, I moved from my hometown to one 5 hours away. My doctors said they could prescribe me 3 months supply while I found a new doctor. Easy, right? Wrong. I have made 3 appointments with doctors in this town and each one has called me back saying “we’re not accepting new Medicaid patients”

I’m sorry, the fuck? I just need someone to sign the little pieces of paper that allow me to take the pills that make my brain work. And sadly, I am one of those people who needs medications. I take them to focus, I take them to sleep, I take them to maintain my mental health. But while I was trying to find a doctor, my antidepressants ran out.

“Oh shit.”

Day 1 through day 3 wasn’t so bad. Felt a bit off, emotions were swinging more than usual, maybe got a bit irritable sometimes but nothing I haven’t gotten used to dealing with over the years. This was hardly the first time my ADHD ass forgot to re-up on meds over a long weekend. It sucks, but it’s manageable. Day 4 changed that. Day 4 I couldn’t sleep. I woke up really to kill someone. I SCREAMED obscenities at my pet cats when they meowed to be fed ( I feel really bad about freaking them out now). Any little thing went straight to 11. My mind was foggy.

Day 5 was worse. The body aches started. My muscles felt… thin, like I could bite right through my arm without stopping. My extremities were at turns numb and tingling. I started experiencing “brain zaps”, which is a phantom sensation that feels like an electric shock goes from your brain all the way down your body. Deeply unpleasant all around.

Day 6 I started feeling a bit better mentally. I found that marijuana could at least keep the irritability down. I made another appointment, then sobbed when I got a call back saying no new Medicaid patients.

Finally I called my mom. The nuclear option. I, a 32 year old man, called my mom hoping she could make things better. And for the most part, it worked, lol. She showed up a few days later and marched me down to an urgent care who was able to prescribe me a months supply. I was so out of it I told them the wrong dosage (I take 10’s but said 20’s) and so wound up with a 2 month supply. Which hopefully will be enough to find a real doctor who takes Medicaid and can write me my magic pieces of paper.

So, what takeaways can be divined from this mess? Don’t run out of medication? Don’t assume you’ll be able to find a doctor easily?

How about “know what medications you’re taking”.

I didn’t ask about lexapro/escitalopram when I started. I didn’t know it was an SSRI, I didn’t know what would happen if I stopped suddenly. No one told me, either. Not one doctor in the 8 years I’ve been taking it warned me about *gestures at my last week of existence* THIS.

And I was okay with that. Because it did what I needed it to do. It works. But as soon as I can find a doc, I’m going to ask them to wean me off it. I can’t live with that kind of pain hanging over my head. The physical symptoms have mostly abated but my legs are still sore and my fingertips are numb. Some studies have shown such symptoms lasting for weeks or even years.

I’m not saying everyone or even anyone should stop taking their SSRIs, and certainly NEVER EVER stop taking them cold turkey like I did. That’s what caused The Issues. But if you are unaware of what SSRI withdrawal feels like and you’re taking them, I would absolutely suggest talking to your doctor about what can be done to minimize the risk of something like this happening to you.

Because this last week has been hell, and no one should have to go through that just because they moved.

[starlightfae]

hey I was wondering if/how you managed to get a cfs diagnosis? its smth i've always suspected I have but everyone tries to convince me it's just a lifestyle issue or a depression side effect :/ also if theres any resources you've found helpful for managing it? thanks in advance !

(also not time sensitive so no pressure to answer quick or at all, trust me, I Get It)

I did manage to get an official CFS diagnosis, but it was more like I kept saying 'I have CFS' until finally, a doctor said 'okay' and put it on my diagnosis list. that's an oversimplification but what I mean is, don't count on the doctors to know shit about fuck about cfs lmao

This going to be a long, complicated answer, so heads up for that lol

I am extremely lucky that I have a mother who supports me. She helped me every step of the way, including standing up for me when I was dismissed and/or ridiculed by medical professionals. This isn't to say it's impossible to get your diagnosis without support, but it certainly helps and I'm not going to pretend her support didn't factor into things.

The first thing you have to do is get any other issues managed. For me, this meant trying out a few different antidepressants until I found one that helped my depression but ~somehow~ didn't affect my fatigue. I was able to point out that my depression symptoms didn't line up with my fatigue. depression and CFS symptoms both fluctuate, so if the fatigue was a part of the depression, it would line up- ie, more depressed, more fatigued (and vice versa)

this also means the doctors have to rule out everything that can cause fatigue. medication side effects, thyroid levels, sleep apnea, anemia, Lymes disease, etc.

something that will be VERY helpful in getting diagnosed is knowing CFS, because most doctors won't know shit about it. Although, with more people getting Long Covid, more doctors are realizing CFS is a real thing. This is because Long Covid is CFS. CFS is a post-viral condition, so if you can point out when you got a really bad virus and then started getting CFS symptoms, that will also be SUPER helpful.

More than likely, at least one doctor will try to shut you down for 'looking up your symptoms on Google and diagnosing yourself'. No shame if that's how you first heard of CFS, but I found it very satisfying to tell the doctor that I checked out library books and took notes lmao! The book I found that was super helpful was "Hope and Help for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia" by Alison C. Bested, Alan C. Logan, and Russell Howe.

as for other resources that may help, the r/cfs subreddit has been quite helpful! mostly in regards to support, but they also have some good links and advice

if you have any more questions or need me to clarify something, feel free to come back and ask! there is a lot more I can say about diagnosis criteria, symptoms besides fatigue, etc but I've already wrote an obscene amount, sorry lol

OH also I kept my notes from when I checked out the book I mentioned above, so if you are interested I can also share that info and save you the effort of reading the book yourself lol

[what-if-nct]

hi hello annyeong! today I realized I am no better than a cat in heat because whyyyyy did an older man show the barest bit of chivalry today and I was ready to thank him on my hands and knees? any way he wanted it.

tbfh, it is not taking a lot anymore to rile me up, cause a stiff breeze will do it. he wasn’t even like, movie star or model grade hot either, just a clean cut older man. it’s the bare minimum for me. he smelled clean, clothes neat, like, why shouldn’t you be out in public not disheveled???? I blame the boss at my job, he came in today with a new hair cut, cologne spritzed up, and just parading around with a saunter that denotes he’s secretly part horse (wink wink wink).

I feel like I need to spritz myself like Blanche Devereau from golden girls. just hot and bothered for no good reason

When I say I feel you, honey I feel you. Like sometimes you just get feral, and you're like a cat in heat I get it! When I think the most wild and obscene things I check my period tracker and low and behold i am in deed in heat. Then when I am not it's something I have to analyze about my character because it gets wild. I just had a thought yesterday I can't say in public but I think I know who you are so I'll tell you later, sorry if I'm wrong but i have good idea I might know. I know a lot of girls hate this and its probably cause for me it's only been guys I'm actually attracted to have done this to me but when a guy moves you over by your waist oh i get weak in the knees. The last time it happened was in Spencer's and like Spencer's is small and he was tall and had like dark kinda long hair and piercings and he just moved me over by my waist I think he worked there and I was like swooning a little bit. Usually it's mostly women and they say excuse me honey or sweetie and im swooning just as much. There is nothing better than a woman calling you honey, baby or sweetie. It's just the best thing. With men it's hit or miss but with women it always hits every time.

[zrllosyn]

WIP Favorite Lines

OUGHGHGH BUDDY IM SORRY I DO NOT CHECK MY MENTIONS ENOUGH BUT!! @hideyseek THANK YOU FOR TAGGING ME!! These are from literally all my documents so. God knows when they will see the light of day. (never)

Rules: a line you think you've struck gold with in your WIP(s)

Most of these aren't necessarily 'gold' but i do like them very much. Also i do obscenely short sentences a lot, so uh. Some of these are two.

Also there is a lot of them so i am putting them under the cut (i write too much random stuff)

COFFEE SHOP - Lobotomy Corporation AU

Its A and Garion character shenanigans, where they hate each other's guts but they've been isekaied and now only know each-other. I think its SO funny. Its a fic for me.

It also brought him curses. Like the one that had walked in through his store's front door.

CORVO LOOPS - Mlp loops but dishonored

Its, for me. Corvo is an anchor and is looping, he goes THROUGH it. This one is where samuel wakes up but this line is so out of context.

"Your halls are a mess corvo, how many damn swords do you intend on collecting--"

UNTITLED - BNHA oc fic

I have this bastard oc I call Thrones bcs he's angel themed, and he's originally and Iruma-kun OC? But i put him into BNHA and it surprisingly works lmao.

The mental blocks he had placed in the way of his quirk vanishes like tissues in water, melting away and he feels his light burn.

TRAVEL - Blind Griffin AU fic

Look, the visual novel is really fun, and I like time travel. This one is parallel universes though, and its about grief.

She stares at the empty lot that was her lab and home, and represses a long, long sigh. 

DARE - Nobunagun Fic

Sio and Adam have gender shenanigans. Aka cross-dressing, but it comes with gender revelations and I love that for them.

"I bet I'd make a better lady than you, at least." Adam scoffs, smiling with all teeth. "Im prettier than you even as a guy."

TOMMOROW, TODAY - Houseki No Kuni Time Travel Fic

this one is on AO3, but the recent chapters i just havent been feeling, sadly. I liked this bit i wrote though.

 Phos tries to argue, the hollow ache in their chest filling their form in a tingling vibration that makes their very form feel like its about to start ringing— and the sky shatters.

UHHH I TAG. FRIENDS. FEEL FREE TO NOT DO THIS. TBH, SORRY IF THIS IS LIKE. SOMETHING YOU'VE BEEN TAGGED IN BEFORE

i am mainly tagging yall from the discord soz

@ajitated @13threbagel @filly-serenity @ravenatural @bubblegumbeech @princessfanonanona