#this is meant in a positive way btw i was this kind of teenager and i have a lot of love for them if they're still out there

[softpng]

do nerd teens even still exists? the ones that read fantasy and write fanfics and dress like they go to Harvard even though they're 13 (but in a slightly awkward way, not the trendy influencer shit) and befriend more teachers than students and you know those teens, are they still out there?

[yuseirra]

I really love your kamiai comics. The warm stories about their communication and interaction completely make up for my regret of not being able to see how they get along in the original work. btw, your analysis is also very good. I like it very much.Can't wait for your next update!❤️

(A small something before I start typing)

Thank you so, so much dear anon!! This really lifts my spirits up so much, you're very kind to expend your time to send me positivity. I appreciate it because I'm the shy type. I know how hard it can be to muster up the courage to talk to someone sometimes. So when I receive messages like this, I get really happy... it'd be nice if the people who were able to send me some kindness felt it was paid back :) I may not be able to reply fast but I try to get back so please be patient with me 'v')9!

HHngh thanks! I'm rereading your ask every word and savoring it! These two don't get that much screen time but what's been shown is really significant, they did have their moments! I'm so glad you feel the way you do after reading my comics and interpretations of them, that's the best reaction I could ever want from someone!! There are still things that are left ambiguous and are yet to be unfolded(I hope it does get explained more) so I'm worried as I draw them out sometimes... but reading this makes me feel empowered!! I feel like I've been doing pretty well, that's what your comment does for me. I'll do my best to think up something good to share with you, thanks for sharing your feelings with me!

Speaking of which, I have another analysis!! I'd like to share it with you here, I'd been writing it up earlier and it's not entirely unrelated to the hikaai situation:

I think it might have been Nino who's sent Ryosuke to Ai. Based on the behavioral patterns, Nino is the type who'd impulsively do something extreme in a fit of anger and later regret it. Even Nino might not have anticipated things would unfold this way, however. The phrase, "I only meant to scare them, I never thought they'd actually die," seems more like how Nino would feel about the situation, rather than Kamiki to be honest? That's a very absurd thing to say, but considering Nino's relationship with Ai, Nino might have been in a blinded, irrational state because she almost worships Ai. So, it's possible that she genuinely didn't think it would turn out this way somehow... she's a teenage girl with a lot of mood swings.

There’s a common scenario in horror movies where a second-place person, driven by jealousy, does something reckless, thinking, "If only the top person were gone, I could..." but not truly realizing the consequences. (It happens a lot as an east-asian trope) Jealousy has the power to paralyze rational thinking. Nino not only hated Ai, but she likely had a twisted affection for her as well. When Ai disappeared, she probably fell apart.

It's hard to imagine Kamiki acting this way, right? He wouldn’t have been unaware of the danger of sending someone like Ryosuke to his girlfriend. If this character did something like that, it would have to be out of serious malice or murderous intent, but Kamiki doesn't seem like the type to harbor such cruel emotions toward Ai. (Or just anyone at all, actually; we never really see him lashing out towards people. Even when he brings Ryosuke, or Airi up... he.. actually talks in a pretty soft sense despite they're absolutely horrible individuals. Even adds a -san and -kun to their names; I was surprised.) In Nino's case, on the other hand, it might have been something done without much thought, as her actions suggest she has that kind of streak. She’s the type who can say, "I wish you'd just die!" to someone but then cry if it actually happens. Her emotions fluctuate a lot.

We also have to note that Hikaru is just as good of a liar as Ai is. He's really used to lying, and that's what's brought him and Ai to relate to each other, bring them together and a crucial characteristic that's had Ai deem "he's the same as her". When he says he's the one who sent Ryosuke as he mentions "he wanted Ai to feel the same despair he's felt", we don't see his face and we only see him from the back. This is similar to the panel where Ai says "I can't love you", which was a well-meant but a really hurtful lie. Hikaru believed Ai and Aqua wants revenge on him. I think he may have tried to save Aqua of feeling even a slight sense of pity towards him as a person, making sure he really isn't worth feeling that way about. In fact, we don't see his expressions at all in that entire sequence, and what he says feels so off and ridiculous for a person with common sense to say. I feel like a lot of it could be a lie. AND I feel like he was putting on a facade for most of the scenes he's been in before the final arc- before he came to meet the twins. He's probably always been pretending to be okay with a smile on his face but he probably was pretty despairing and dead inside (his eyes turn black when he's in despair, you know)

At least so far in the story, Kamiki has never shown much interest in Ai's idol activities in the scenes he's been in. Instead, it was Ai who learned something from Kamiki. The fact that Ai is an idol, a star who attracts attention, was never portrayed as particularly important to Kamiki during their relationship. Ryosuke is a big fan of Ai as an idol, but there’s no clear reason why Kamiki would connect with someone related to Ai in that way. To Kamiki, Ai was like a light—a single, unique person he deeply depended on and loved, as if he could live with just her by his side, yeah, but it's a little different from viewing her as a idol. He probably depended on her a lot, but it seems he loved her not because she was an idol or someone shiny and valuable, but because she was someone who could understand and care for him. He doesn’t have the mentality of "I can't forgive an imperfect Ai." That kind of anger, resentment, or desire to make Ai suffer seems more likely to come from Nino. Kamiki even seems to think it’s natural that Ai wouldn’t like him back. He’s too accustomed to that feeling.

Kamiki’s actions suggest a certain helplessness. He seems to accept everything without resistance, always at a loss for words. This has been consistent from the moment he was introduced. When he asked Ai, "You love me, right? You won’t leave me, right?" and her response was something like, "I don’t know," he ended up going outside and crying in the rain. When he was gaslit by Airi in an absurd way, he despaired and stood there, frozen in panic. Even when Ai said something harsh and broke up with him, he couldn’t say anything back. Even 15 years later, he watches a video and is rendered speechless, reaches out to Ai, and curls up. This sort of behavior is so consistent that I realize this character doesn’t have any self-defense. He just accepts everything as his fault and internalizes it. It’s like he’s been so used to terrible things happening to him from a very young age that he doesn’t even think "I hate this" but rather, "People like it when I do this, so this must be right." With that kind of mentality, he gets pushed around. He seems to accept every negative judgment about himself and engages in self-destructive behavior.

The likelihood of this character doing something aggressive like sending Ryosuke to Ai is, in my opinion, less than 2%. Suddenly lashing out four whole years after the breakup? He probably went to cry after he got the phone call. Didn't he just reach his drinking age? Maybe he went to drink for the first time because he was so distressed after receiving the call… and somehow, in that state, he met Ryosuke and accidentally let the address slip, which led to Ai’s death, and now he feels like he has to save her with all he's got. Ai's the one who saved him, and it's kind of natural for him to feel like "Now I should save her in return, I don't care what happens to me!" That would make sense, right? The lyrics, the character’s personality—it all fits if you take it this way. And his personality doesn’t seem to have changed all so much actually. While reading the manga, I thought, "What’s with his way of speaking? He has such low self-esteem." Now, reading it again, it feels like he’s deeply immersed in self-blame.

The song Fatal starts with the lyrics being:

Waking up from another dream, I open my wet eyelids I curse my helplessness from those far days which dreadfully remain Will this despair that burns my body feed me someday? I keep burning myself from it as I crave adoration

This is totally how Kamiki would feel after he learns about Ai's death, if that's not what he's ever expected to happen. He'd be in utter despair and feel so helpless about not having been able to do anything as the only love of his life die like that. That's why he's so desperate in the entire song,

Without you, I cannot live anymore I would sacrifice anything for you I can’t get enough of your love What should I use to fill in what’s missing?

These sets of lyric's too intense for it to be Aqua's, but it fits his dad's mentality perfectly. Kamiki's life's been so miserable.

Ai is an exceptionally well-crafted character. When you consider the details, like the story of her trauma from the glass shards in her white rice (which broke my heart when I read it), you can see how much thought the author put into crafting her psychology.

Why write a story where she asks a favor to her own dear children to help out the person who's the very cause of her death? How could that character be portrayed as if they truly, desperately loved Ai? Isn’t that incredibly cruel to Ai, the victim? If it were me, I wouldn’t write the story that way. I don't think the writer would have either. I really feel that Hikaru isn’t the type of character who would do something like that. And since Ai’s affection for that character aligns with that sort of interpretation, with it being really consistent, I think… it's a lie and a misunderstanding.

I think that, unable to forgive himself for unintentionally leaking the address and thus contributing to Ai’s death, Hikaru wanted to be punished and ended up telling Aqua a ridiculous lie. If someone could open Ai’s heart to that extent, it could only mean that this person was genuinely beloved by her. For someone as wounded as Ai, finding a person she wanted to love that deeply isn’t easy. But if that character had committed such a terrible act, what would it mean? It would feel so unsettling. It would conclude that Ai failed to find someone to love, that she trusted the wrong person, and that the protagonists’ father was someone who harmed their mother. When you consider what the manga is ultimately trying to say, the less responsible the character Ai loved is for her death, and the more genuine their feelings for Ai, the greater the impact would be. It would also make sense in the context of Ai, who wanted to give love, finally finding someone deserving of it.

I couldn’t form a solid opinion until Chapter 154 and Fatal came out. I wasn’t sure how things would turn out and just watched. But after those chapters, I felt that this interpretation was correct. When you interpret it this way, it aligns with the psychological depictions throughout the story. It’s not that I deliberately interpreted it favorably because I liked this couple, but rather that as I analyzed it, this interpretation made sense, which made me more favorable towards them. There's certainly a difference between the two.

I was really happy when I received your message and a few other ones saying that my interpretation was warm, persuasive, and made you appreciate this ship ;v;.. Oh, I really want to get this right too... thanks guys, I very appreciate your kind words, sorry if what I say turns out to be wrong but I am trying my best!!

I take psychology very seriously, so if this turns out to be right, I’d be thrilled! This is what makes the most sense for me at this point, so I'll hold onto it until things clear up~

Again, super long reply! I hope you're okay with it, anon! Lots of love, thanks for the cheers and kind words!!

[r0gue-taxidermy]

PACKERS AND PACKING INFORMATION AND REVIEWS:

Cw: prosthetic male genitalia/penises for informational purposes only 

I’m going to start this by first introducing myself so hello I’m Jackson I’m a plus size ftm trans teenager and I’m going to go over the best and easiest way to pack as a trans dude

You may be asking what a packer is? Well a packer is a gender affirming tool that creates or mimics a bulge or a penis which may seem like it’s a thing meant for adults but actually it’s very useful for everyone it helps with dysphoria or even just helps if your wanting to appear more masculine

Another thing that will be mentioned are STPs; STP stands for stand to pee device which do make it possible to as said stand to pee which can go from looking realistic or just being a cup with a tube

so I will be ranking my favorite packers/STPs/packing alternatives and will include where to find and price ranges and packing ability’s. If you have any questions either message me or comment them down below! Starting off strong with number one my favorite packer is

1. STP FREELY:

This is my favorite STP packer it’s 3.5 inches long and is a SOFT packer with a wide brim cup with a lip so no worry about spills or anything made with a skin safe soft silicone , definitely more of an affordable packer + STP it ranges from 45-50$ and it comes in 5 different skin tones! there is a XL Version of this packer that is 5 inches that I have not tried that is 50$ (you can also buy the XL rod which turns this into a pack and play “toy” for around 16$) and both xl and regular come with the option of being circumcised or non circumcised which I think is a neat feature! This packer also requires a harness ! I recommend the cake bandit packing harness it’s comfortable and not too tight. you can find both of these on TransGuySupply.com

Packing ability:9/10 definitely my favorite packer I’ve owned packs very well

Looks:9/10 nice weight, decently realistic but there are definitely better packers on the market but overall a wonderful packer

Stp ability: 10/10 very easy to get used too, big cup with a lip and semi realistic urethra hole

Can’t stress how much I love this packer will buy again

2. EZ bulge:

Here’s a cheap simple packing option for people who want to try out packing as it’s a foam insert made of a thicker foam material that you put In your boxers, these usually range from 5-10$ which isn’t bad the only downside is that they are stiff and if your bigger like me it will rub against your thighs and become uncomfortable and there’s definitely pros and cons for this packer like it’s latex or silicone free but it is kind of stiff and hard to position you can get this packer from transguysupply.com or Etsy!

Packing ability: 7/10 it works but is kind of uncomfortable and if not positioned right can look funny

Looks: 6/10definitely a more discrete option if you don’t get one with a dick imprint

3.HOMEMADE SOCK PACKERS

Omg I can’t express how much these save my life if I’m dyphoric these are a simple, cheap and easy way to pack I can’t express how much I use these on a daily basis, there are plenty of videos on YouTube on how to make these (kade cooks has a good tutorial on YouTube btw)

Packing ability:5/10 definitely a easy packing tool but can look kinda wonky if not made right and may take some trial and error

Looks: 2/10 definitely not a good looking packer but gets the job done

4.FOAM INSERT PACKER

Similar to the EZ bulge this is another foam packer insert but definitely is more comfortable, it’s a thin foam works well with most of the packing jockstraps,briefs, or boxers it’s about 5$ usually. I had one for a couple months then it started falling apart as the first layer of thin fabric came off of back but was a cheap and easy packer and is way more discrete option you can find this packer on transguysupply.com

Packing ability: definitely a solid 6/10 it works well but can fold or bunch up easily if you have bigger thighs

Looks:5/10 decently discrete looks similar to a bra cup

5.PACKER GEAR STP

this was my first ever STP or packer in general and can I say how much I hate this packer very small cup with no lip so spills are a big problem, it is almost physically impossible to use this as a packer this is the stiffest packer I’ve ever had IT WILL MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE YOUR HARD, the urethra and hole of this packer is massive and it’s unrealistic you will piss a stream the size of a no.2 pencil. One of its cons though is that it is the cheapest stp packer I know it’s 15$ and comes in two different skin colors, it is around 4.5 inches and can be found on transguysupply.com

Packing ability: 0/10 it’s trash

Looks: 5/10 it definitely tried to look realistic

Stp ability: 5/10 definitely not the best on the market but for how affordable it is it’s not too bad minus the firm cheap silicone and small cup

6. ANY FEMALE CAMPING URINAL

Such a honorable mention this fuckin thing well these can be found in most camping places, Amazon or anywhere online really. I can’t say I hate them but I can’t say I like them either but definitely work, they look mad dumb honestly and make me dysphoric lowkey but they work as STPs but unlike the other two options on this list this can’t be used as at a urinal but they don’t spill and are easily found and can be used by people who aren’t FtM or transmasc and usually range about 5-20$ online

Packing ability:0/10

Looks:0/10 mad Fucking ugly

Stp ability:10/10 definitely does the job

And that’s the end of my review folks I hope this can help out other trans people

[phantom-chirp]

Oh sorry the last part was exaggerated as a joke I didn't mean it in like, a combative way? Idk if It came off that way I also like Crow btw fhfjdkfkf. But I mean I do strongly feel his det. Prince teen idol persona is nominally "supposed" to encourage the public to Support The Police's Valiant Fight To Capture Those Evil Phantom Thieves (TM)! (and increase support for shido but when the PT enter the scene those become intertwined). of course we later know that akechi doesn't really give a shit about the police as anything more than a stepping stone for his eventual revenge against shido (he calls them incompetent), but I mean, the public is supposed to think he earnestly believes in his justice as a police detective, aren't they? And he makes some comment in his first TV station appearance about how he's helping the police to capture the Phantom thieves because their existence is a threat to society or something (I'm sorry, I don't have the exact wording on me) and I dont think fact that he is technically using the detective position to cover up crimes changes the fact that it's his day job or anything yknow? But that's because they had to have made him part of law enforcement in some sense since he's joker's rival and at some point plays the part of an antagonist, and joker is a criminal rebelling against the justice system etc (even if akechi doesnt like that system in the end – the Detective Prince has to)

So I also do think that the police, who don't KNOW who akechi really is, are using him and his prettyboy persona to appeal to the public and to a teenage demographic in particular (though we know that some adults supported akechi as well, of course). The phantom thieves case IS a police case, after all. It's because they need to sway the public to their side and away from supporting their thieves ��� even when that stops being necessary after okumura, they can still take advantage of akechi to generate more hype for the arrest

W/ the romance thing, it makes sense to appeal to his fans there because it makes him sound like someone who’s knowledgeable about romance. I hate what im about to say but it feels like. Kind of supposed to mix the princely goodboy act with an undercurrent of like. "oooooh he'll play with your heartstrings isn't that spicyfjekgkfk I hate typing that I hate thinking about teen idol tropes /lighthearted. I mean I don't Think that to be clear that's the reaction I think the TV show is trying to provoke augh. But anyway I'm not trying to say this is the only interpretation or that he's not gay and sad 24/7 LMAO, it just works for me because especially after killing joker he has to establish himself as a hero and an icon and. The whole celebrity thing of a desirable/unattainable boyfriend to keep appealing to that audience... Oh my god is this too many words I'm so sorry

(ask related to this post and this post)

The amount of words is fine no need to apologize, honestly I like longer written things in discussions like this because it leaves less room for misunderstandings. I also write a lot often so I don't mind

Thank you for clarifying. Specifically in relation to the Phantom Thieves it makes more sense to me what you were getting at, I see. The distinction between the Detective Prince and Goro Akechi is important here, because personally those wouldn't be his motivations and his personal feelings regarding the Detective Prince thing play into his childhood and such so that's why I had a more negative reaction to that part of your original ask so I apologize for that

With the romance thing, again I can understand that reading of those lines but it still isn't an interpretation that fully makes sense in my brain? The idea that it's intentionally meant to play more into the... as I can best word it right now, badboy-esque behaviour (I understand anon I hated even typing that lmao) but that's also never really an aspect of his Detective Prince persona that he ever actively played into before I don't think? Might be forgetting and even if I'm not it doesn't mean it's impossible for him to ever actively do so, but still

The public opinion of the Phantom Thieves had already gone basically fully down by the time that interview happened so I just don't see how likely it is for Akechi to play into an aspect of his fame he himself didn't even seem to like from what I recall since I feel like it would be easy to get the public back on his side and all that without doing so. Though Akechi's emotions were probably all messed up after killing Ren so it's hard to say, Akechi is a real difficult character to try to look at analytically because we get very little insight into some of the aspects of his character and he's really complicated

As I said in the tags of the original post I do have an interpretation of it that I think somewhat works and can explain why he made that connection but I do worry it could just be because I'm biased towards shuake. Despite all I've said I will say that your interpretation does make sense as a way to view why he said that, especially with the added information from this ask, but personally it just doesn't click with my brain for some reason

[limeade-l3sbian]

This is such a weird message for you to get but I wanted to get these feelings out somehwere and you are very comforting.

I feel like i’m forever done with social media. I’ve spent so much time on social media since becoming a teenager. I’ve neglected my actual social life completely for years. And it’s not been good for my social development, as an already awkward person back then i’ve only become increasingly more so. But I kept going back to social media. It would make me anxious to be here but also without it. It would make me angry. Having to interact with people and seeing peoples extreme emotionality. It ruined my mood very often. People were always extremely toxic over the smallest disagreements and would throw extremely severe buzzwords at everyone. Like radical feminists being called genocidal or fascist. Even though I knew I was none of those or some of the other stuff others have called me, it felt incredibly burdensome and tiring to have such serious terms thrown as me and others similar over very small disagreements. Then there’s the threat of doxxing online. It got me so scared from years ago when a friend of mine was doxxed over an anime disagreement. Yes you heard that right. She thought a character in a show was overrated and someone took it upon themselves to doxx her and out her sexuality to her family. Luckily they were accepting though surprised. But the mere fact that stuff like that was becoming more and more common place in the online space to do was frightening. Especially nowadays when i’ve been part of communities regarding much more heavy subjects. The odds are higher and I’m too old. I’m only in my twenties but I feel simply too old for all the drama online. It’s exhausting. Seeing people try to argue over the most insignificant stuff you might say in an afterthought on twitter or on here or wherever. People will find a way to start arguments. Always. And im simply not in that mindset to engage anymore. I can’t. While I’m still exhausted I’ve stopped being anxious in the way where i shake. I’m apathetic largely in my reaction towards others online now. I cannot connect to others anymore. I like some more than others but I don’t trust anyone even the slightest bit anymore. My anxiety is mostly focused around the lack of trust now towards the people, not the actual spaces.

You might say it’s odd for me to say all this, online. It is I guess. I’m not leaving the internet per se. I’m just not addicted anymore, i think? I’m not reliant. And i’m completely fed up with social media. I do not wanna make friends or connections. I do not wanna argue my POV with others anymore. I don’t wanna try. Sometimes it’s nice to just exist without having to justify said existence and I think the online space have become nothing except that, people trying to justify their opinion and feelings and push them onto others. I’m doing it in a way now. You will be my last online interaction. I’m sorry. But you are my favorite account on here and you remind someone from my past. In a positive way.

My mother always say that people online are not a real representation of humans. But I always think to myself that I disagree. I think online, people are their truest selves, without the fear of repercussions in most cases. But peoples true selves make me irritable and anxious. So goodbye social networks.

merry belated christmas btw

This was very insightful and actually gave me quite a bit to think about on my end as well, anon! You've perfectly worded what it means to be chronically online. Not in the way meant to offend, but in the literal sense.

I appreciate the kind words 🥹 and I wish you the best of luck! This sounds like a really good decision and the amount of self reflection you have is gonna do you a lot of good now and later. Best of luck! 💜💜💜

[flo-milli-shit-hoe]

MEGA ATSV SPOILERS

okay, so, im using this post to coalesce all my thoughts about this movie character by character, and no this is not proofread/edited

LAST WARNING FOR SPOILERS (also this post is just long asl)

Miles:

MY DAYS!!!! he is such a cool character. his entire struggle is about trying to fulfill others expectations and growing to find himself despite those expectations. AND GOD if that is not the teenage struggle. he doesn't want to disappoint his parents, but he also want to live up to being spiderman. AND he's still struggling with the grief of not being able to see his ppl (gwen, peter, etc) again bc they're in other dimensions.

ALSO, I love how his character represents the struggle of morality (get it? morales, morals- nvm). everyone in the world has different morals and different ideas on how to enforce right and wrong. a major point in this movie is what happens when you force your morals onto everyone else

Gwen:

ALSO ANOTHER COOL CHARACTER!!! like im still mad that she kinda betrays miles by never telling him the whole story. BUT OMG her character is such an interesting exploration of identity and trust (and also how much hurt you cause even when u think ur doing the right thing; bc girl why didnt u tell miles what was going on).

her dad unknowingly hunting her the whole time is such a cool part too. like it speaks to how parents can make their children feel unsafe with uninformed opinions and biases, aka all his comments of how dangerous spider woman is even though he doesn't know the full story (i.e. spouting homophobic things around you child not knowing they're gay; or supporting the criminalization of things like weed despite stats showing that such a petty offence is used to put undeserving ppl behind bars (btw these r just random examples))

Hobie:

ISTG I LOVE HIM SO MUCHHHH!!!!! his character is such a good tribute to what a punk ACTUALLY is. especially in a time where skinheads and sharps are such a pervasive problem in the community (also fuck all the yt ppl who ruined the term skinhead, you appropriated british-jamaican culture and put it with nazis, i fucking hate you). despite all the disdain everyone held for him and his idc attitude, the one thing hobie was consistently is KIND. he barely knew miles for more than 20-mins and still helped him when shit went south bc that's what punk is meant to be. its community support, kindness, and righting the wrongs made by the establishment.

Pavitr:

I ALSO LOVE HIM TOOO!!!!! his character is so happy-go-lucky and positive (and honestly the opposite of most peters that we see). im sad we didn't get to see more of him and his universe except for setting up the plot of spot and miles being an anomaly.

Miguel:

THIS BITCH!!!! I LOVE AND HATE HIM!! he's such a well developed antagonist. esp bc he's not actually a villain, he's just another spiderman. he's such a good analysis on what happens when a person thinks that suffering is inevitable/is required to develop as a person.

AND YES WE FUCKING KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU BREAK CANON! i keep seeing analyses of his character that keep asking 'well how do we rlly know what happens?' he tells you, the movie tells you, EVERYONE TELLS YOU what happens. the only reason he is the way he is, is bc he broke the canon and got punished by the narrative for it. now, this isn't to say that what he's doing is right (trading lives for one another), just that it makes sense from his perspective.

Jessica:

another adult that i kinda hate.

but i get it, she has a baby and her own home dimension to protect. but damn, this isn't the way to do it. she's another wonderful example of what happens when ppl believe that suffering is necessary (like yes, suffering happens, everyone will suffer; but the whole thing about being a hero is to prevent suffering when you can!!! not to enforce your ideal of what morality is).

both her, peter, and miguel represent one major part of the generational divide between gen x and gen z. SO MANY ppl in gen x (jessica, peter b, miguel, any other older iterations of spiderman) believe that struggle is required, and that things shouldn't improve so that future generations have to struggle like they did. but ppl in gen z (miles, gwen, hobie, pravitr) are suffering from decisions we didn't make, being tasked with fixing these problems so future generations DONT suffer like we have to.

Peter B:

my dude, you fucked up, you have to accept that before you keep trying to apologize. stop shoving your fucking baby in everyone's face

once again, a perfect example of why you can't try to enforce your morality on everyone (except he's not as clear cut as jessica and miguel bc he switched sides in the end). i think he (and gwen) knew what they were doing was wrong lowkey. but didn't understand just how cruel it was until it happened to someone (miles) they cared about personally, which is a whole commentary in and of itself. and honestly, i think he still wouldn't have realized it if miles went along with it instead of fighting to save ppl.

Mile's parents:

they act just like my caribbean father and aa mother istg

they are the best outcome of 'your parents are ppl too'. they sacrificed so much to get miles to where he is and want to make sure he doesn't waste his opportunities in life. they're the perfect example of well-meaning parents, and im SO GLADDDD that they start learning to listen to miles. im so excited to see how their relationship with miles develops in the next movie.

Gwen's dad:

a perfect example of what happens when you jump to conclusions like its the olympics.

(like most cops) he doesn't investigate the other factors to peter's death and just goes with the most obvious lead, spider-woman. which, eventually, costs him his daughter (quite literally... he fucking shoots at her). BUT, it was SOOOO refreshing to see him grow because he realized that his job was ruining his relationship with his daughter.

The spider ppl of the first movie:

(this category is like penny, noir, spider ham, etc.)

you sometimey bitches pmo. like the first movie was a wonderful example of how to fix the spiderverse w/o all the shit miguel is doing. yet, here yall are betraying miles.

i have nothing else to say

if you made it this far

SHOUT OUT TO THE WRITERS OF THIS MOVIE!!!!

ESP BC THIS CAME OUT DURING THE WGA STRIKE. YALL DESERVE ALL THE LOVE, YOUR JOB IS SO HARD. AND YOUR WORK IS SO IMPRESSIVE!!!

SHOUT OUT TO THE ANIMATORS TOOO!!!! YALL PUT SO MUCH LOVE AND CARE INTO THIS MOVIE. ITS PHYSICALLY PALPABLE HOW MUCH YALL CARED ABOUT GETTING EVERYTHING JUST RIGHT.

(though it does suck that you can't watch this movie if ur photosensitive, which def defeats the 'everyone can be spidey' thing and it's just ableist)

[sehnsuchts-trunken]

The Kings of Middle Earth - Thranduil | Thorin | Bard

pairing: Thorin x reader, Bard x reader, Thranduil x reader | gender neutral! btw lol

wordcount: i was too lazy to check

triggerwarnings: there's two sentences with gen z exaggeration indicating suicide, and i just want to say that this is not meant to in any way downplay suicide and suicidal thoughts. please don't take it seriously. if you have to fight those thoughts yourself, remember that there's telephone numbers and websites where you can ask for help

here are three gifs because christmas. 

no im lying its because google wouldnt give me one of all three of them in one so i had to do them separately. 

stan my kings or come die at their hands,, because you will, i dont make the rules- i’d say “or come die at my hands” but thats very unrealistic tbh, i wouldnt be half as good at fighting as them and also they can look out for themselves very well. mostly. partly. what im tryna say is fuck you if you dont like them 

Being ambassador was fine. Usually. Fine when there weren’t three grown men, kings at that, gushing and fighting over you like teenage boys. And the fact that your family had mixed to the point where you had all their kin’s blood flowing through your veins - which had really got you this position in the first place, seeming like a good idea at the time and a very questionable one now - made it a ton worse. You had been fairly sure that you could play some kind of helpful role in the negotiations after this war, but all you had got yourself into was a mess that rather ensued another one instead of solving the first. In a way you were naively proud of it, flustered and bemused and all giddy because of it, but far more than that were you annoyed. They got on your nerves all the time and made your job so, so much more complicated than it had to be and than it initially had sounded like. 

Today had been especially exhausting to say the least. Normally you ignored their behaviour, dismissed all they said that had nothing to do with negotiations, and quickly slipped out of the room before anyone could stop you. You didn’t quite know either why you were so disinclined to spend more time than necessary with them - certainly every other person in your place would enjoy it far more. But today of all days you were in no mood for another of those meetings, for negotiation and talk of war and their tiring attempts at snatching your attention away from the parchment you always had draped over your lap. You’d woken up in a bad mood already, then spilled your breakfast on your newly put on clothing and had to change it. Your horse seemed to be in the same kind of gloomy state you were in, because the second you’d slipped into the saddle it had thrown you right off again. Luckily it wasn’t a rainy day at least, so you’d only fallen onto grass and dirt and not mud to stain your shirt again. 

You lived in a little house in Dale at the moment, one of those that was safe enough to sleep in without being crushed by a breaking ceiling. That really would’ve fit your mood though. Thorin had offered you chambers in the mountain, Bard and Thranduil had offered you one of their tents, but you’d declined both and declared that you’d gladly stay on your own down there in a house far enough away from all three of them that you didn’t have to see none of them even when you rode up to the mountain when there was a meeting to attend to. Because they did usually happen in the mountain. Only rarely did Thorin come to Dale, and then only when the two other kings had complained so badly about their rides that he had no other choice but to offer a meeting in their tent. Because he was certainly not about to offer chambers to them. And they would not have accepted anyway, neither of them, for very different reasons. 

“Are you even listening?” 

The pen you’d been holding slipped, drew a dark, black line down the parchment and fell to the ground with a thud. You cursed as you bent down and reached for it before surveying the damage it had done - this was one piece of parchment you would surely not be using further. 

“I was, in fact, not”, you muttered, crumpling it in your hand and throwing it to the corner of the room - where you would absolutely have to go pick it up again once you were done, but couldn’t bother thinking about now. You’d been gloomily, silently sitting in your chair, staring at the parchment and your pen and not listening to anything the three of them had said. It was a wonder they spoke without your assistance anyway. Now you looked up to behold the mostly bemused face of Thranduil and the somehow a mix between worried and amused expressions of the other two. You straightened your back, ran one hand through your hair and tilted your head to the side a bit. 

You might have been in the presence of three kings, but you certainly were not going to act like someone had shoved a stick up your ass, especially not after three months, three months!, of these ridiculous negotiations that could have been settled after one. And, despite the utter respect both Thorin and Thranduil were used to being shown, none of them had once commented on your less royally-fit behaviour. You were you, and the kings were also just men, with emotions and thoughts the same way you had them, so there really was no need to play the cowering animal. Yes, they had done great things, yes, they had a ton of influence, yes, they could probably have you executed or thrown into a cell in a matter of minutes, but they were not god-like beings that you should fear. Really, who could actually be afraid of these three absolute, jealous idiots? 

So you leaned back in your chair and stretched your legs out on the stone floor. “I seem to have missed the entirety of the conversation, though I do have to admit I’m shocked there was one at all.” 

Thranduil, who was in the chair opposite you which he’d claimed his ever since the first meeting, smiled, and it was a soft smile that you couldn’t help but return. If any of them were to be feared, it was him - but not by you, not when that lovely smile was so often directed at you, not when there lay something beautiful in his gaze that you could always spot when he was looking at you. 

But it was Thorin who replied, and you tore your eyes away from the elf and towards the dwarf, who sat, of course, at the head of the table, lounging in his chair that was just slightly bigger and slightly more decorated than the others were. He was as proud as Thranduil was, but this was his home after all, and so he had all the potential to show it. Not that you minded - it was never his behaviour that was affected by it, not around you at least, it was pride for his people, pride for his kin, just the same way you knew Thranduil had it, too. It was strange how much the two had in common, though it led more to argument and difference than similarity. 

“What is it that is on your mind so much you cannot pay attention to the one talk that happens without you?” 

He was grinning a bit, though he tried his best to hide it. You did not - you laughed out loud without restraint, actually laughed for the first time today. As much as you cursed the lot of them, you loved them too, for they could cheer you up in a matter of seconds and have come close enough for you to throw away all reason more than once. You knew that if you were not here for work, you would not have denied them your blush and giggle and become as lovesick as you sometimes felt you wanted to be and had never been. 

“Horrible morning, I have to be honest with you. But - The moment one sits down to think, one becomes all nose, or all forehead, or something horrid”, you quoted with the ghost of a smile on your face. “Thinking makes age a quick thing and beauty lingers only in youth. I don’t like losing all sense of reality, so I do dearly apologise.” You chuckled quietly as Thorin raised his eyebrows, looking only a little bewildered. 

“Because we never get back our youth. The pulse of joy that beats in us at twenty, becomes sluggish. Our limbs fail, our senses rot. We degenerate into hideous puppets, haunted by the memory of the passions of which we were too much afraid, and the exquisite temptations that we had not the courage to yield to.” You laughed, almost snorting as you beheld the face of utter confusion and perplexity of the dwarven king. “It is in the brain, and the brain only, that the great sins of the world take place.”

You turned your head back only to see that Thranduil had raised his eyebrows all the same, and Bard was smiling faintly, eyes fixed so piercingly just on you that for one second you had to blink. It was no predatory gaze, no stare that could have made you uncomfortable, yet he seemed as though he could read you like an open book, and you had to admit you’d thought more than once that he knew you well without actually knowing you well. It was strange in itself that you were in this situation, kings so alike and different all the same, and while they took the same interest in you for whatever reason that you could not tell, they looked at you and spoke with you so uniquely that sometimes you wondered how they all held the same title. 

“It’s a wonderful little book, one of my beloved favourites, but hauntingly real in a way that left me breathless upon first reading and still does whenever I open it, though now I can recite half of it”, you explained, rolling the remaining parchment in your lap to make it a scroll and putting it onto the table together with the pen, not believing that you had been here for hours and written down two sentences collectively, which now were gone as well, for you had crumpled them and thrown them away. You were well aware that you were not here to speak about books you enjoyed, and had someone told you half a year ago that you would care so little that it were three kings you would open up to so easily, you would have laughed at them. 

“I don’t remember ever having read anything like it.” 

You tilted your head to the side and looked at Thranduil, knowing well that the small smirk on his face was a mirror of your own, but only bothering to consider it for the sake of Thorin’s scowl you could see even out of the corner of your eye. It had become normal at this point, even though you still checked twice when it were not the elf nor the dwarf, but the human king, who was usually, though more expressive than Thranduil, less likely to show jealousy, jealousy of all things!, like that. 

“I would have been shocked”, you admitted. “It’s human literature - the kind that no one reads anymore, I would have been surprised even if Bard had recognised it. But he does not strike me as the type who owns too many books anyway. Or do you?” You turned your head to look at Bard once again, ignoring wholly the way the elf tensed. You liked the three of them, but you simply could not bring yourself to be less annoyed by the constant competition about you. You, of all people. What reason was there for you to be fought over? By kings, dear god! No matter how much you did not want to consider their titles, there was life to be lived, people to be tended to, courts and lords and ladies to be satisfied - indeed, as much as you did not want to worry about it, as much as you did not want to see them in that way, they were kings, after all, and you were no ruler, not even born royal, and certainly not suited for a crown, even if it was one won in battle the way Bard had. 

Your expression fell once more today, and you slumped back into the chair, barely noting the shake of his head and the answer he readied himself to give turning into silence as he frowned. Of course it was today that you managed to also pull yourself down further. Hadn’t they just managed to cheer you up? And hadn’t you recited about how horrendously thoughts could poison the own mind a literal second ago? 

“What is it?”, Bard asked. You couldn’t bear the sheer worry that was laced with the simple question, about to crush your very skull. What had you got yourself into this time? Three kings, three charming kings, each so wonderful and wondrous in their own way, and somehow you were stuck in the middle of it all and toying not only with them but yourself, knowing fully well that there was no future for any of it, no matter a decision or none. You couldn’t rule a kingdom even if their interest were to be serious, and certainly you could not rule three. You pushed yourself out of your chair, ignoring completely the pairs of eyes that bore into yours. 

“Excuse me”, you said through gritted teeth, dragging your gaze to the ground and, just to busy yourself, pulling the cloth you used as a hair tie from your wrist and prodding your mane with it, trying to make it into some kind of presentable bun while taking three steps collectively before you were stopped. 

“I- We will not.” Thorin blocked your path with an arm to your waist, and you looked at him despite yourself, instinct taking over. All of this was shit. All of it was hell, and you had run right into the arms of trouble once again, just as you had always done, your whole life. For once you were happy, and after all it was just an illusion anyway, just a moment, something with only present and neither past nor future. It was definitely the wrong decision to lift your gaze though, because the second you saw the expression on the dwarf’s face, you were inclined to either throw yourself into his arms or off a balcony. Never before had anyone looked at you with as much care, as much tenderness and worry as these three kings did, and you could not keep it, not a single one of them. Though at this point you were not sure if you could and if you even wanted to decide if you had to, which you would not, because this thing was nothing but the blink of an eye for them, nothing serious, even if it was real. 

“You will tell us what is wrong”, Thranduil demanded, though... it was as much order as it was plea. A king speaking and a lover asking. Perhaps the throwing off a balcony idea was one you could actually make use of. It took all your willpower, all your concentration and determination, but you turned around slowly, did not whisk and jump over. the table and neither did you cry. You would not. This was work for you, negotiations for them... they were kings, you would not behave like a two year old in front of them, though you felt like one. And you knew just as well that you would crawl before them and beg if it came down to it, the stars knew for what. 

Thranduil's lips were a thin line, his stare as icy as it was soft, and you could not even bring yourself to wish you had never come to this war, because... as stupid as it was, you were more, far more than happy that for once there was someone who cared, that there was someone you did not mind being just yourself around, who teased and joked and still accepted all that you were. It was not your and not their fault that they were kings. 

“I’ve had a bad morning”, you repeated again, and indeed it was true- just not the whole truth now. Though the elf’s gaze softened, and Thorin to your left grabbed for your hand and gave it a light squeeze in reassurance - which was so unbelievably unusual in itself that you had to look down at your intertwined hands and brush your thumb over his skin in amazement. Thranduil did scoff this time, but the way your face lit up made up for it. He watched, not without the hint of a smile, your eyes widen and some of the life returning to your cheeks. Some of the heat, too. You hid it well normally, but never good enough, always just so much that they all still noticed it, and now that you made no point at all trying to conceal it, he found himself enamoured by it, wishing that it was him and not the dwarf who caused it, but content regardless, and promising himself that he would have you blush far more often in the future. 

“But it is more than that.” You turned around once again to look at Bard, brushing a strand of hair out of your eyes that had fallen from your bun. You nodded, perhaps more gravely than before, which had Thorin strengthening his grip on your hand. Like a desperate man, you thought, and it brought a bit of a smile back to your face, if only for a second. Who cared that these men were king? Who cared that they had a crown and a title? Who cared? For in this moment, you decided that you did not. And it was a burden that fell from your shoulders, one that you had only subconsciously acknowledged, one that you’d ignored the way you’d ignored all that was too far from the topic of war and negotiation. They were here, they were right here right now with you, and there lay fondness and genuine interest in all their gazes, and everyone could go to hell if you could not savour that. If this were to end in heartbreak, then so it be, and as long as it did not, you would enjoy the present that this one was. Enjoy the interest of not one, but three kings, in such a person as you, of no name and no influence, with no promises and no obligations.

“Perhaps”, you said, and the corners of your lips tugged up. How ridiculous everything was, and how little you were to care for it. “Or perhaps not anymore.” 

[bybdolan]

I’d be really interested in reading any essay by you on that One True Love trope and how it’s impacted your view of relationships btw

The “One True Love” trope in particular is not really something I have struggled with in regard to my own life (although I definitely have stressed myself out over really wanting to be with only one person in my entire life), but it is part of this larger shipping-culture complex of viewing romantic relationships as part of a narrative that really affected the way I view love. Obviously this makes a lot of sense when looking at a piece of fiction, because romance absolutely does serve a narrative purpose in art, but it cannot be applied to real life because our lives are not a pre-written narrative. Having grown up in fandom, I often looked at the relationships I had in my own life as part of a larger plan. I evaluated possible romantic prospects on the basis of how they would fit my character growth or what they would communicate about me to outsiders. (The latter point is something that YouTuber Olisunvia touches on in her video on Hyperreality in Love, which I consider an incredibly important video on love in the age of social media and increasing communication of the self through consumption.) I would even go as far as to actively think about who an imaginary audience would “ship” me with. Romantic love became a vessel for self-actualization and my ideal of a relationship or a romantic partner was much more closely tied to outward perception than to what I actually wanted. The complex nature of my attraction to men in a society that frequently tells women to attach their self worth to a man also plays a big part in this, as does the general insecurity my teenage self felt, but I nonetheless believe that my conception of love would have been VERY different had I not grown up in online spaces were romance actually WAS something to be consumed and something that way conceived with the audience and a narrative in mind.

When romance is tied to a narrative or to an overarching theme or plot, when it is something that is supposed to grab the consumer’s attention, it isn’t really allowed to be plain or boring. And I am not saying that there aren’t stable relationships depicted in fiction, but when one takes a look at fanfic in particular, it becomes clear that the way love (and lust!) are depicted is oftentimes meant to elicit strong feelings in the reader. Of course fluff is a thing, but I personally don’t find it super interesting to read about characters cuddling on a couch. Which brings me to my main point: A lot of the time, traits that make a relationship good or compelling from a narrative standpoint are RADICALLY different from traits that make a relationship good in real life. This is why toxic, co-dependent relationships are interesting or why people get invested in decade-long pining, when both of these things would SUCK in real life. I am not saying real-life long-term relationships are boring, because I do not believe that is true, but a lot of it is just… Hanging out. You are not overcome with burning desire whenever you see your significant other. There is no endless “will they won’t they” back-and-forth. The love you have for them becomes simply blends in with the rest of your life. And it is wonderful! And it is very different from the high-stakes romance we often deal with when we look at popular ships!

Also, on a final note because I touched on it at some points in the previous paragraphs: The idea of the “one true love” is often tied to the trope of years and years of pining away after somebody because you will never love somebody else the same way, etc, that is frequently romanticized in tumblr circles. It may sound incredibly romantic, but it honestly kind of sucks when you are in that position, and it puts you at risk to put the object of your affection onto an incredibly high pedestal, which is a dangerous position to be in. Love is a magical, incredible thing, but it also is SO banal in a lot of ways. And there is a lot of beauty in that.

[elentiyawhitethorn]

When Passion Rules the Game | Part Seven

CW: NSFW, language

AN: Wow, I wrote seven chapters in seven days and I feel so accomplished! This fic has been so fun to write, and I hope everybody enjoyed. (Last chapter btw)

Part Six//Masterlist//2835 words

By some miracle, Aelin made it through the rest of the day. She introduced herself to Nox, showed him the ropes, and got some work done. And as soon as she had completed the day’s tasks, she just about bolted out to her car, headed to Rowan’s apartment.

There was no hesitation in Aelin’s mind as she firmly knocked on Rowan’s door. He would let her in, explain, and she would realize that this was all some cosmic joke.

Aelin heard footsteps approach the door, and she braced herself, straightening her back and plastering a smile on her face.

But the door never opened. After a moment, Aelin heard the footsteps retreat, and she blinked in confusion.

She knocked again.

Another minute passed. No more noises sounded within the apartment, and Aelin started to scowl. What right did he have to ignore her? She was his boss! Well, not anymore—but that was beside the point.

Aelin reached for the handle and jiggled it, but it was locked.

“Rowan,” she called. “Please let me in.”

“Dammit, go away, Aelin.”

She hadn’t been expecting a response, and to hear that animosity toward her frightened her. Rowan must have quit because she was sleeping with him, and he wasn’t comfortable with the situation. Aelin had never done anything like this before, never unintentionally harassed someone out of their job, and her heart started aching. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go.

Coming to terms with the fact that Rowan wasn’t going to let her in the door, Aelin pulled a bobby-pin from her hair and inserted it into the lock. She had been a rambunctious teenager, always causing poor Aedion and her parents trouble, and picking a lock was second nature to her.

She smiled internally as the last tumbler fell into place and the lock clicked. Aelin absentmindedly discard the bobby pin in her purse and turned the knob.

Rowan was sitting on the couch, hunched over with his head in his hands, clearly upset about something. His head snapped up the instant Aelin walked in, and his eyes narrowed. “How did you—”

Aelin shut the door, cutting him off. “Why did you quit.” She was slightly angry at herself, and it came out in her tone.

Rowan sighed. “I resigned.”

“Same difference. Tell me why.”

Rowan stood up, but still kept his distance. “I found a new job. I thought it would be a better opportunity for me.”

Aelin scoffed. “You were just relocated to Terrasen. Don’t tell me you’re moving again.”

“I’m not moving. I got a job at Salvaterre Enterprises. It pays more.”

“If you wanted a raise, I—”

“I left. It’s done. There is nothing to say.”

Aelin frowned, trying to cover up the fact that her heart was fracturing in her chest. “But—”

“Do you always break into the homes of employees who decide they don’t want to work for you anymore?”

The ice in Rowan’s voice had Aelin trembling. “I want to know if you’re leaving because of me.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because you’re sleeping with me!” Aelin yelled. “And you’re quitting because you’re worried about it or you’re not comfortable with it or something and I can’t just let you do that! I can’t just sexually harass one of my employees and let them leave.”

Rowan’s eyes widened. “You’re not… Aelin, this is not your fault.”

“Then what is this?” she rasped. “Why did you even apply at Salvaterre Enterprises anyway?”

She could see the hesitation in his eyes. Rowan took a step forward, then paused. “I can’t… I just needed to go. I’ve never been uncomfortable around you, Aelin, I swear.”

“Then why, Rowan, did you go? Because I’m going to keep believing this is my fault if you don’t prove otherwise.”

He hissed out a breath and turned around, running his hands through his hair. “It’s because I…”

“Because you what?”

“I can’t… I shouldn’t say.”

“Tell me,” Aelin’s demanded. She dropped her purse on the floor so that she could cross her arms.

“Because I’m in love with you!” Rowan shouted, spinning back around. “Because I love how passionate you are about your work, and how funny you are, and how you pretend to have an attitude but spend your whole life trying to help people. I love the way you tuck your hair behind your ears when you’re nervous, and how red your face gets when you’re embarrassed, and I even love the way you eat your gods-damn bagels with a fork. And I can’t do it anymore!”

Aelin couldn’t summon words. Rowan loved her?

He was breathing hard, surprise evident on his face. Maybe he hadn’t meant to say all that.

“I think you should go, Aelin. Don’t feel bad. You’re not to blame.” Rowan sighed, turning his head.

He expected her to leave. To walk out and pretend this had never happened, to forget about him. Aelin didn’t know what she was going to do next, but she sure as hell wasn’t going to forget about him.

Rowan took a deep breath, then looked back at Aelin, who wasn’t breathing at all. “I’m sorry, Aelin. But I need you to leave now.”

Aelin didn’t do that.

Rowan gasped in surprise as he felt Aelin’s lips crash into his. She had mindlessly surged forward with no intentions of stopping herself. Aelin fisted her hands in his shirt and pulled him closer, tangling her tongue with his. Rowan kissed her back for what could have been a minute or an hour; Aelin was too lost in him to tell. When he finally pulled back, they were both panting.

“What does that mean?” Rowan gasped out.

“I think I might be in love with you, too.”

Rowan yanked her back to his mouth, and Aelin felt herself melting into his touch, trying to get closer and closer, touching as much of his body as she could.

They parted again, and Rowan raised his hand to her face. “You really feel the same?” His thumb stroked her cheek and Aelin leaned into the touch.

“Of course I do. You’re amazing and kind and hilarious, and despite your protests to the contrary, you’re a total sweetheart. I love you, Rowan. I should have noticed it a lot sooner, and I must have been blind not to until now, but I see it now. I love you.”

Rowan leaned forward and pressed their foreheads together. “I love you, too. I’ve never felt like this before. I’ve cared about people, but no one has ever driven me so insane.”

Aelin laughed. “I drive you insane? I have never broken so many rules because of one man. And that’s really saying something.”

“Oh, I know,” he replied, their noses brushing. “No goody two shoes knows how to pick locks.”

“Don’t ask me about that,” Aelin said, laughing. “Or I’ll ask you why you have a picture of a scowling teenage boy with chains dangling from his jeans hanging up on the wall.”

Rowan groaned. “My mom made me hang that up when I moved in.”

“Oh, you’re a mama’s boy, then?” Aelin teased.

Rowan smiled, but the expression turned fond as he leaned forward that last half-inch and kissed her. It was nothing like any of the kisses they’d shared before; this one was soft and sweet. This one was full of love.

When they pulled apart this time, Aelin whispered, “I still can’t believe you love me.”

“Neither can I,” he replied softly. “I never expected you to say it back. Though I’ll admit, I wasn’t surprised to find you stubbornly knocking on my door.”

Aelin smiled, then tugged Rowan down to the couch, plumping onto his lap. “So now that we’ve gotten the love confessions out of the way, maybe we can try to be in a relationship? Be together?”

Rowan smiled. “I would love that. But I might have to dump you if you ever call me a sweetheart again.”

Aelin let out a choked laugh. “But you’re so sweet. Like a little cinnamon bun.”

“I really hope you did not just say that.”

Aelin grinned. “Now that we have all this sorted, you’ll come back to the company? Nox was good at the job, but he doesn’t have your work ethic, and I had to tell him how to—”

Rowan smiled sadly and interrupted her. “Babe, you would be my boss. We may be able to keep a lid on friends with benefits, but you think no one’s going to be upset to hear you’re in a relationship with me?”

“I don’t care what people think,” Aelin insisted, despite the sinking feeling in her gut.

He tugged her farther onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her. “It’s still wrong. I can’t do it.”

“But… Rowan, you can’t give up your job for me.”

“I’m not. And if it came down to it, I probably wouldn’t. And neither would you, I would guess, should you ever be in that position. Your dedication to your career is one of the things I love about you.” At Aelin’s sad nod, he added, “But I got job with Salvaterre Enterprises, remember?”

Aelin rasied her brow.

“I wasn’t lying,” Rowan said with a grin. “I got a good position there, nothing worse than I had with you. I’ll miss working with you, but I’m excited to be working there, and I’m excited to be with you.”

Aelin bit her lip. “Okay, but I don’t care that you already got hired. I’m sending a recommendation for you. Not just because I love you—never because of that—but because you are an amazing worker. Besides, I know Lorcan.”

Rowan blinked in surprise. “Lorcan Salvaterre?”

Aelin flashed a grin. “We went to college together. Like you, he pretends to be an ass, but is super sweet.” Rowan scowled, and she laughed. “And he’s head-over-heels for Elide. I’ve been trying to set them up for ages.”

“Wow,” Rowan said.

“Underestimating my connections?” Aelin asked snarkily.

“Just shocked that you have friends with money. After all, you just about swiped my savings last time we played poker.”

Aelin smirked. “Lorcan always paid up in other ways.”

“I really hope you didn’t just imply…” Rowan trailed off.

“Imply what?” Aelin asked innocently.

“Did you sleep with my new boss?” Rowan asked, dreading the answer.

She laughed. “No, I was just kidding. I made him do my homework for a month every time he lost.”

Rowan breathed a sigh of relief. “I’ll admit, I’m surprised you would trust someone to control what grade you get.”

Aelin snorted. “Oh, I wouldn’t. I turned in my own work. I just wanted to make him do it for the fun of it. He went ballistic when he found out I never turned any of his hours’ worth of work in. He’s been trying to get me back for it ever since.”

“Um, perhaps I won’t tell him I’m in a relationship with you, then?”

Aelin cackled.

After another hour of chatting and laughing, Aelin decided she would tell her cousin and friends about this tomorrow, and Rowan said he would do the same by calling his mom. She could barely contain the joy that flowed through her thinking that people would know about them, that he cared about her enough to tell his mother already.

The hand that Rowan had resting on her thigh started stroking her, and Aelin started trying to recall what underwear she had put on his morning. Hopefully something nice.

Aelin ground down on Rowan’s lap, and he stood in one sudden movement, pulling her legs around his waist. Aelin sighed against his neck as he carried her to the bedroom. It sure as hell wasn’t the first time she’d been in here, and it wouldn’t be the last.

Aelin smiled into Rowan’s shirt, but that smile dissolved when Rowan threw her onto the bed. She smiled up at him prettily, the epitome of virtuous and wholesome. Rowan just snorted and said, “Take your clothes off and touch yourself.”

Feeling blood race to her face, Aelin sensually stripped off each piece of clothing, a bit more urgently than she’d been attempting to do. It was hard to act sexy when Rowan was shirtless and smirking at her.

Once she finished, Aelin lay back and spread her legs slightly. She let one hand tug on several strands of hair, delighting in the way Rowan’s eyes tracked her hands.

Then Aelin licked her lips and moved one hand to her stomach to stroke the smooth skin. She smirked at Rowan as she moved her other hand to her mouth and sucked on her thumb, making sure he was able to see as her tongue swirled around the digit. Aelin brought her wet thumb to her nipple and rubbed it roughly, parting her lips in a breathy moan.

She noticed the bulge in Rowan’s pants becoming more apparent as she played with her nipple and teased him with the hand moving on her lower stomach, and she grinned. “Get on with it,” Rowan growled.

Laughing, Aelin spread her legs farther and trailed her hand down, pressing a finger into her entrance. She immediately gasped and inserted another finger, unused to having control over when she got what she wanted.

Knowing exactly what she was thinking as she started thrusting her fingers harder, Rowan smirked and pulled his shirt off. No matter that seeing him watching her made her even wetter, Aelin couldn’t concentrate on what she was doing when she looked at him. She averted her eyes to ceiling and started pumping her fingers in deeper, groaning.

But it was not to be. “Look at me,” Rowan commanded, and Aelin had no choice but to obey.

Holding his gaze, Aelin thrust her hips into her hand and and brought the second hand down the rub furiously at her clit. She was moaning now, making more noises than she did when she was by herself, turned on by the way Rowan rid himself of his pants and started pumping his own length.

“Stop,” Rowan ordered, right as she felt release nearing. She couldn’t. She couldn’t stop. She was so close, and just few more thrusts and she would be at the edge and—

Aelin’s hands were forcibly removed from her pussy, and she cried out as she was flipped over on the bed and spanked.

“What did I tell you?” Rowan’s voice was the sharpened edge of a blade, and Aelin shivered.

“You told me to stop,” she whispered.

Rowan’s hand smacked her ass once more. “And did you?”

Aelin whimpered. “No, sir.”

He spanked her again, his hand stinging the sensation flesh of her bottom. “Why not?”

“Because,” Aelin rasped, trying to summon even a single coherent thought, “I needed to come. I needed to.”

“Hmm,” Rowan said, trailing his finger along the curve of her ass. She shivered at the sensation. “But you knew I wouldn’t let you. And look where we are now.”

Aelin squirmed in his grasp. “I’m sorry.”

“Are you?” He brought his hand down, the slap sound filling the air. “Or are you just saying that so I’ll stop?”

“I’m sorry. Please, I’m so sorry.” Aelin clung to the sheets, burying her face.

Rowan hummed thoughtfully and spanked her again. But before Aelin could beg him to stop again, callused hands gripped her thighs and spread them, Rowan’s cock filling her almost instantly.

Aelin moaned loudly into the sheets. “Rowan, gods.”

He grabbed her hips, pulling her onto her knees and farther onto his cock. She whined and lifted her ass higher in the air.

Rowan’s grip was bruising as he slammed into her. He started pounding into her, and Aelin wondered how she was supposed to walk into work tomorrow and concentrate on her job, let alone walk at all.

The fingers Rowan had on her hips dug harder into her skin, and Aelin felt even wetter knowing that he was marking her right now. His cock was hardening fully inside of Aelin, and the immense awareness she had of him was driving her crazy.

Rowan’s balls slapped her pussy and she screamed into the sheets, her orgasm forcing its way over her body in a shattering earthquake of pleasure. Rowan kept moving, fucking her senseless as she shook and screamed, finally coming and spilling into her.

Once he separated their bodies and rolled over, Aelin turned on her side and put both an arm and a leg across his body. “I love you.”

Rowan kissed her neck. “I love you, too, darling.”

Aelin snuggled closer and, instead of reflecting on her previous shortsightedness and poor judgment, thought about how much she was looking forward to a life being teased, laughed at, fucked, and loved by Rowan.

Little did Aelin know, Elide would owe Dorian twenty bucks after losing the bet about how long it would take them to confess their feelings. What an interesting day tomorrow would be.

———

Tag List:

@aelin-bitch-queen

@autumnbabylon

@evolving-dreamer

@feysand-loml

@flora-shadowshine

@gracie-rosee

@infernoqueen19

@julemmaes

@lemonade-coolattas

@live-the-fangirl-life

@midsizewitch

@mis-lil-red

@morganofthewildfire

@nehemikkele

@pagemasters

@realbookloverproblems

@rhysandswingspan

@rowanaelinn

@sexy-dumpster-fire

@sleeping-and-books

@story-scribbler

@swankii-art-teacher

@thenerdandfandoms

@theysayitscrazy

@yesdreamblog

[soyouthinkucanwrite]

Trip to the store with Tom and Harry

*This is actually part of a chapter of something I've been writing for myself, just for fun. Basically, the reader is staying with them for the weekend, things are still pretty recent with Tom, she's famous too, whatever, whatever... there are 15 chapters tho (48k + words)! This blurp doesn't contain smut, but the others do, so let me know if you like this, and I might post the full series.

Minor warning: people taking unsolicited pictures, panic attack foreshadowing. Also, this is in a world pre-pandemic (the series happens in June 2019) that's why no maks. But you live in 2021, so please wear yours!

Overall, just pure fluffiness and brother's bickering. Enjoy and please, please give me your feedback!

This is 2k+ words, btw

*edit! I did it you guys, here's chapter 1 of the whole series

“Just leave it, baby” Tom calls out when I get up from the breakfast table taking the dishes to the sink to wash them.

“It’s fine, just a couple plates” I say already washing them. “You wanna go to the store now or later?”

“Let’s go now” Tom says.

“I call shotgun!” Harry announces.

“Absolutely not! I’m driving and(y/n)'s my-” I keep my ear open for the end of that sentence, which apparently won’t be coming out because Harry starts to laugh and I can tell Tom wants to kill him for that. I just shake my head and keep washing the plates, pretending I didn’t hear anything.

We go back to his room to brush our teeth before heading out and I consider changing my clothes, but decide this is fine (out of laziness). Tom changes into a pair of joggers and shirt, he looks like he’s going to work out, but handsome as always. I wonder if he’s going to wear the cap and sunglasses that he keeps on his car for quick disguise. He grabs his wallet and the car keys and we’re heading out when I remember my wallet.

“Hold on, forgot my wallet” I say going back the hallway.

“What you need your wallet for?” He asks when I get back, he was waiting for me at the end of the corridor. We go down the stairs, Harry is already there waiting, flipping through his phone.

“You see, a wallet is where you keep your money and these plastic card thingies, which are like money, but virtual. Money is something you need to give the people at the store-”

“Alright smart ass, I get it. You won’t need to buy anything, it’s what I’m saying”

“Please don’t get him started” Harry pleads with me when we get outside the door.

“What?” I laugh. Tom unlocks the car and I go straight to the backseat, trying to avoid another awkward sitting discussion.

“Tom insists he pays for everything around the house. Part of the reason why we go grocery shopping without him” Harry says from the front seat. “He’s pretty good at making money, got admit. But terrible at managing it, the lads don’t even pay rent!”

“Would you like to pay rent?” Tom asks, reversing the car and taking a glance at me, winking.

“I’m your brother! Dealing with you IS my rent” I laugh the whole way to the store at their banter about money, the radio, the car temperature. I catch glances at Tom through the rear mirror, smiling every time he sees me watching him.

“Why are we here? I though it was only food” Harry asks with an annoyed voice when Tom turned to get in a parking lot.

“We’re getting other stuff too” Tom explains, parking and getting out of the car, taking my hand. He didn’t get his cap and sunglasses. We left the car at a parking lot and walked to a discreet door that read ‘collect by car’, was this some kind of celebrity special entrance? We take an elevator and when it opens it’s like a mall, or a department store. A fancy Target, I’d say. ‘Marks & Spencer’. Uh…very British. Harry takes a cart and Tom gets another. I follow Tom but notice that Harry goes solo on his shopping trip. Tom’s still holding my hand and I look around to see if anyone’s watching but apparently not. “Let’s look at the blown dryers first, huh?” He says and I nod, following his lead.

When we get to the beauty tools section (is that what they call it?) Tom reaches for the fancy, expensive blow dryer models and I reach for the travel-sized ones. I look at him smiling. “You were thinking about getting a blown dryer for the house, weren’t you?”

“Weren’t you?”

“Tom, you’re seriously buying a blown dryer just because I asked to borrow one?” I laugh at him.

“I could use one too, you know? It’s not just for when you come around” He says in a tone that gives away he was thinking exactly the opposite.

“Okay then. Not that brand, though. This one” I put back the travel size and step closer to him to look at the models, reading the boxes and considering the options. When we settle for one he puts it on the cart and we keep walking through the store, reaching the products section. “Shampoo” I indicate, walking towards the shelf with all the options.

“Hi, can I help you guys?” A store attendant asks approaching us.

“Hi” I say smiling at her. “Just looking for some shampoo and conditioner”

“Something specific?”

“Not rubbish” Tom jokes. And she looks confused.

“He uses Head & Shoulders and is offended I called it rubbish” I explain to her laughing.

“Oh…that’s not good” She grimaces and Tom shakes his head.

“I know! Thank you! It doesn’t have to be anything fancy…I don’t know any of these brands though…” Me and the attendant start talking about shampoo and Tom zones out, looking around. When I finally pick one, along with conditioner, hair mask and styling gel I put it all in the cart and thank her. Tom was looking at a shelf with bath products, bath salts and bombs.

“Hi” I step to his side.

“Bath bomb? Doesn’t sound very relaxing” I laugh at that. Boys. When I was going to explain it to him two girls approach us.

“Hi, Tom!” One of them says, blushing furiously.

“Uh…hi!” He answers, slightly startled. “How’s it going?” He recovers his composure.

“Fine…Uh, is it ok if we ask you for a selfie?”

“Sure, no problem” He smiles. They look in between him and I.

“Could you take one, (y/n)?” Does she mean with me, or she want’s me to take the picture?

“Sure, give me your phone” I say reaching for her phone. And they laugh nervously.

“We meant with us”

“Oh, yeah” I laugh. “Course” Tom is watching and laughing at me. “But do you want me to take one of you guys with him too? So you don’t have only selfies”

“Oh would you? Thank you!” They say giving me their phones and posing along him. He keeps staring at you the whole time. I snap multiple pics with both phones and give them back to them.

“See what you think” I gave their phones back.

“Oh it’s great! Thank you”

“You didn’t even look at it. What if she’s a shitty photographer?” Tom laughs.

“Excuse me? I’m a great photographer” I answered him. “I bet the one’s you take won’t look so great” I said posing with the girls, who were just staring at the two of us in awe. I smiled while Tom snapped the pics and then he gave their phones back.

“Thank you!” One of them smiled.

“Yeah thank you!” They were walking away when one of them looked back and shouted. “You guys are really cute together!” And they sprinted away laughing.

“Teenagers” Tom says shaking his head and laughing.

“Don’t know, we ARE really cute together” You tease him, poking his side.

“I know, wasn’t disagreeing” He says defensively. “You can’t make every fan encounter this long though, or else you’re never gonna get anything done”

“Okay grandpa” You laugh. “Common, it didn’t even take that long”

“Not this time. Probably made their day, though” He says. “Just don’t get frustrated if every fan isn’t this nice”

“I don’t expect them to be. It’s just, they liked whatever we do and it’s part of their lives. Doesn’t cost anything to be nice, and besides, it’s a positive reinforcement. Next time they need courage to do something, it’ll be easier for them. People make too much fuss about celebrities, but like, asking a date out is way scarier and more common” Tom just smiled and shakes his head. “What?”

“I really love your mind, you know?”

“What did I said?”

“The positive reinforcement thing. I though you were going to say we’re leaving a good impression” You scoff.

“Bath bombs” I say trying to change the subject. “It’s like aspirin, for your bath. They’re really nice, wanna pick some?” He nods picking one up and trying to smell them. You guys joke around and pick some bath bombs as well as some bubbles and shower gel. “We got so much stuff” I say looking at the cart.

“Only essentials” He says and kiss me on the cheek. “I like this, get used to it”

“What?”

“Spoiling you. I’m like a sugar daddy”

“Oh my god, you didn’t just say that” I laugh. “That makes me a toiletries sugar baby” He laughs and pushes the cart along the corridor. We find Harry on the beverages section, picking up some beer boxes.

“So much for groceries” Tom says looking at his cart. Chips, candy, beer and milk. We get a few more items like some fruits and vegetables, yogurt, eggs and of course a bunch of ready meals, which seem to be a must for them.

“You guys don’t cook much, do you?” I joke.

“Only when Sam’s around. Which then he cook’s for us, of course” Harry answers and I laugh.

“Is he at school?” I ask.

“Cooking school. In Paris” Harry tells me, putting the groceries on the cashier belt.

“That’s so cool” I look at Tom. “That’s really cool”

“I know. Wait, are you really more impressed by my younger-chef-brother than my acting career?” He laughs.

“I mean…” I shrug and Harry laughs at us. We see a flash and turn our heads at the same time to the woman on the line behind us, who had her phone pointed to us. I look down and Tom puts his arm around me. “She’s taking pics” I whisper to him getting out of his embrace.

“So?” He says and puts his hand on my back, standing with his back to her in front of me. Harry hurries up and finishes putting the groceries on the belt, bagging everything up. I go to help him while Tom pays for our shopping. We put the stuff back on a cart and get out of the store. When we get out of the elevator and in the parking lot again, I hear Tom saying to Harry ‘Ride on the back now, yeah?’. We put everything on the trunk and Harry gets on the backseat, so I get on the passenger seat. Tom starts to drive and takes my hand laying on my thigh, he rubs his thumb over the back of my hand and I’m glad he’s being mindful because these encounters with paparazzi and random people taking pics really stress me out.

“I don’t really mind taking photos” I say out of the blue. “When they introduce themselves and ask for it”

“It’s so disrespectful, pisses me off” Harry agrees. “Like, you want a photo? Fine, just ask for it. You don’t simply snap photos of random people on the street, what makes you think you have the right to do it if you saw the person on a movie before?”

“We only saw that because the flash was on too. Makes me think of all the times I never see it. Like you’re always being watched. It’s…” Scary? Stressful? An invasion of privacy? All of the above?

“I’m sorry” Tom says, tightening his grip on my hand.

“It’s not your fault” I say.

“I’m still sorry” I give him a half smile. Nothing we can do about it, is there?

“Nice record Tom, where did you get it?” Harry asked lifting the Lime Cordiale record I bought Tom at Camden.

“That’s (y/n)'s” He says.

“I bought it for you” I smile.

“What? Did you?” I bit my lip smiling and nod. “I’m an idiot, sorry”

“That you are. An ungrateful idiot apparently” Harry says.

“It’s ok” I give Harry a glare. “It’s ok, really” I repeat looking over at Tom. “As long as you listen to them now”

“I will, promise” He smiles and lifts my hand to kiss it. Harry makes a gaging sound and I just laugh.

[readyplayerhobi]

Flower | Drabble 3

Okay so...this is set the day after the MC meets Hoseok’s parents and is from Hoseok’s POV! So...it’s 2.3k so a bit of a long drabble (especially given how short the chapters of Flower are) but I suppose you’ll enjoy it. Please reblog if you liked it and leave me comments about what you thought about another venture into our leading man’s head!

You get to find out a bit more about Hoseok, his mindset, his past and his relationship with his mom here :D

This isn’t proof read at all btw lol

-

Hoseok watches his mom carefully as she makes her way round the kitchen, the ingredients for her banana nutella pancakes laid out before her as she prepares to make him breakfast. It’s the day after he’d introduced you to them for the first time and you’re still upstairs, fast asleep in the double bed that had been his since he was sixteen.

Unsurprisingly, he’d gotten up long before you had. Over the course of your relationship so far, Hoseok had discovered that you could sleep forever if allowed whereas he quite liked to be up and about in the morning. Which was why he was up at only 8am on this fine Sunday morning.

Neither of you had intended to stay the night but by the time the movie you’d all been watching had finished, you’d been fast asleep against him and he’d been loath to make you wake up to travel all the way back to yours. So instead, with the permission of his parents, he’d taken you upstairs and carefully tucked you into bed before curling up beside you.

At the moment though, it was only him and his mom awake which was why she was indulging him with his childhood favourite. Licking at his lips, he takes a sip of the sweet, fresh apple juice and sighs softly to himself. There’s a lot of times he wishes he could go back and fix things with his parents when he’d been an ass to them.

He’d said a lot of things he hadn’t really meant, things that had been hurtful for the sole purpose of being hurtful because he was angry. It hadn’t been a pleasant experience raising him as a teenager and he was aware of that now, aware that he couldn’t change anything but it still made him feel guilty for what he’d put them through.

His parents had loved him despite whatever he’d thrown at them and he was just thankful now that they hadn’t thrown the towel in. That they’d persevered and given him chance after chance. It had taken him a while, but he’d finally opened up and taken that chance after years and now he was determined to not ruin things for them again.

They’d lost one child already, he didn’t want them to lose a second.

“Do you want me to cut them into Power Rangers?” She says suddenly and he realises he’s let his thoughts get away with him. Blinking rapidly, he processes what his mom says before laughing and shaking his head, remembering how she used to cut them for him back then. She’d gotten a special pancake...tin or whatever they were called to make him Power Ranger pancakes.

“I think I’m okay to just eat normal ones now mom. But thanks. Next time I feel like defeating Rita Repulsa, I’ll let you know.” It makes her laugh and he smiles at the sound, realising that you were completely right when you’d teasingly called him a mommy’s boy when you’d found out he called her every other day and talked for hours. You’d meant it in a positive way but it was true all the same.

There wasn’t a lot he wouldn’t do to make his mom happy. Not when he’d spent so long making her sad.

“Well, I’m just checking. You’ve not asked for banatella pancakes in a long time.” She turns round and hands him a plate piled high with pancakes, more cut bananas carefully placed atop the pile of extra Nutella that he loved so much. Banatella had been what he’d nicknamed them when he’d been like...six or something.

Hoseok shrugged, placing the plate down in front of him and picking up his fork. A careful bite has his mouth filly with fluffy, perfectly made pancakes that fill his mouth with sweetness. Humming happily, he tucks in and eats contentedly while his mom cleans up. He wants to protest her making this without making herself anything but she brings a bowl of muesli with fresh strawberries to the table and sits opposite him.

“I wasn’t expecting you both to stay the night.” She says, beginning the conversation as she takes a sip of her coffee. It’s black, like she always has it, and he’s always amazed that she can drink it like that.

“We weren’t gonna, obviously. But she gets tired very easily and gets a teeny bit grumpy if I wake her up. Didn’t think it was worth it.” Shrugging, he eats another mouthful and looks down at his plate.

“I peeked in at you both this morning, I’ll be honest. It was cute though. She was almost sprawled over the top of you.” His mom laughs lightly, her smile bright as she remembers and Hoseok can’t help but laugh in response.

“Yeah...she does that. There’s like zero concept of how to sleep next to someone ‘cos she’s never had to before. I don’t really mind, doesn’t wake me up. Except that time she accidentally punched me in the face in her sleep. Didn’t mean to, but I woke up to a sore jaw and her hand right there.” He snorts at the memory, fingers rubbing at his jaw as he gets a phantom pain.

“I think I’ve done that to your dad a few times so I guess you might expect it a little more.” The conversation dies down a little after that and the two of them just eat, the silence comfortable. But Hoseok has a question burning within him that he’s a little surprised about, a need to check that his mom likes you. That she approves.

He doesn’t want to say it though because he feels a bit stupid acting like that. At almost twenty-nine years old, he doesn’t need his parents approval anymore. But he’s spent a large portion of his life being an asshole to them and never doing anything right. So he has a need to make sure that he’s doing this right.

“You like her, right?” Mentally, he facepalms as he realises that he’s asked the question in the most childish and attention seeking way possible. There was even a little hint of whining in his voice, which he doesn’t even understand because why the hell would be whining about this? Maybe it’s because it’s his mom or something.

She pauses in her eating, looking at him intently and he resists the urge to fidget under her stare. That was a mom stare for sure and he feels like he’s done something bad. Like whenever she caught him smoking weed in his bedroom in high school or that time he’d had to hide a girl in his closet. 

He’d been a wild teenager, he admits this.

“Yes. I like her. And so does your dad. She’s very sweet and kind. A little shy and a little awkward like you said, but...she’s nice. I’ll admit, she’s not what I expected when you announced that you had a girlfriend you’ve been dating for longer than three weeks,” He pulls a face at that. “But I’m glad of that actually. You had some...dubious choices back then.”

“I think you mean that I was chronically allergic to the concept of a relationship and therefore only ever ‘dated’ girls had the same opinion as me.” That was a nice and polite way to put it, he thinks to himself proudly. Better than saying ‘I liked to stick my dick in women who had no expectations of a future’. 

Thinking back, he really was an asshole for years.

“You mean that you slept with women, you didn’t date them?” His mom says dryly, a brow raised in amusement at him as he sputters at her bluntness. Literally, there’s bits of pancakes everywhere now and he’d be embarrassed about that if he wasn’t mortified over the fact his own mother had just openly pointed out that she was highly aware of his previous sex life.

“Mom!” He whines, rubbing at his mouth to make sure there’s no residue and cleaning his lip ring. “Yes. That. we don’t talk about that anymore. That was a different Hoseok. He had...low standards. For everything apparently.”

“Well, I’m glad that you raised them with Y/N. She’s honestly lovely and if you were acting like how you used to act, then I’d say you don’t deserve her. But you’ve changed a lot and it’s very clear that you love her and want to try hard. And she obviously loves you too.” Playing with a piece of banana, he pokes his tongue into his cheek as he considers her words.

He knows you love him. You haven’t told him yet, but he knows. The level of trust and faith you’ve put into him to not hurt you was a little humbling and only part of why he was trying so hard with you. Hoseok’s past was filled with many women, sure, but he honestly believed it was because he’d just never found anyone he’d clicked with and wanted to be in a relationship with.

“This is going to sound incredibly sappy and I kind of want to sink into the floor just thinking the words. But it’s like I met her by pure chance when I wasn’t looking and she’s everything I wanted. I have to work a little, be incredibly understanding and slow with her but...I’ve never found someone that I want to try so hard with before. Even that first date, when I was just going along to give it a try and realised this girl is nothing like any other girl I’ve been with before, I knew that I’d found something worth keeping. She’s just...she’s not perfect. And she’d be the first to tell you that. But it’s like...I’ve never been so fascinated with someone, her mind goes a million miles a minute and I can barely keep up but she comes out with the most random shit and I love it. I don’t know what it is about her but...I found her by accident and I never wanted to let go once I did. God that was really lame, wasn’t it?” He cringes.

His mom is smiling so happily though and he realises that her eyes are glassy, causing him to whine once more as he realises he’s made her cry. Which is ridiculous, why is she crying?

“Why are you crying!” Hoseok protests, a little outraged that his incredibly soft words had made her cry but more worried about the fact he’d made her cry. What had he said to cause this?

“It’s nothing sweetheart,” She says, her voice strained as she reaches forward and grasps his hand. “It’s just...hearing you talk about her. I don’t think you realise just how much you love her really. Your face lights up and you get this smile. I spent a long time thinking that I’d never get to see you this happy, that you’d never settle but you didn’t just find someone to love. Hobi, my baby boy, I know you’ll roll your eyes at me but I really do think you’ve found your soulmate.”

Okay, she’s right. He does want to roll his eyes at her when she says that but he doesn’t. Because he can see how happy she is and how emotional she is to hear that he’s finally found the happiness and stability that he’d obviously been searching for for so long. He’s not an idiot. He recalls his therapy very well and he’s pretty convinced that he never settled for anyone before because he didn’t believe that he should just settle for someone he liked.

His sister never got the chance, so he should make sure that he found the one. Oh god, he’s being just as sappy and romantic as his mom now. She’s putting these thoughts into his head, that has to be it, he thinks to himself. But he doesn’t say it because she looks happy, and that’s all he wants.

“I’m not gonna say that’s cheesy. Okay no, it was definitely cheesy mom. But...I’m not gonna say no either. And I would like it if we could both just forget this conversation ever happened please. I feel very embarrassed right now and I know it’s fine for men to talk about their feelings but there’s talking about their feelings and then there’s talking about their feelings to their mom. I just...as long as you like her.” And now he’s gone awkward, causing his mom to laugh as she picks up his empty plate and places her equally empty bowl on top.

“Hey, hey, I can clean it! You made it, I’ll clean it.” He says insistently, standing to take them from her. But she simply shakes her head and gestures to him.

“Nope. You should go back up and wake her up for breakfast too. It’s fine, I’ve got it. You want to forget the conversation happened? Go bring her down for breakfast. Otherwise she’s going to hear all about how her big, tattooed and pierced boyfriend melted into ice cream talking about her.” He recognises that tone in her voice, the teasing one that’s edged with more than a little sarcasm.

Hoseok recognises it because he does it himself and he locks his jaw at realising he’s been outmaneuvered by his own mother. Not surprising really. She did give birth to him and all. So he does what any dutiful son would do in this moment and backs down at the threat. Before leaving though, he pauses in the kitchen doorway and points to her, eyes narrowed.

“For the record, I’m only going because we’re going somewhere today and she needs to get up. It has nothing to do with me telling you things. If you think it’d embarrass me, you’re totally wrong. I don’t know what woman wouldn’t like to hear that her ‘big, tattooed and pierced boyfriend’ was getting all mushy over them. So ner.” And with that, he does that very adult and mature thing of sticking his tongue out at her before leaving.

His moms laughter is sweet music to his ears as he climbs back up the stairs and he smiles in response.

[weathergirl8]

Cave-In (Part 6)

This is my first time writing in TAG version. I normally write our boys in TOS or Movie universe for the last sixteen years. So, hopefully I’m doing them justice!

I’ve been a little MIA lately. College has been a little intense these last few weeks as we head toward the end of the semester. Add Covid-19 work stress and we all know how fun that has been.

I’ve been feeling angsty lately, so inadvertently so are the brothers.

BTW, this is taking on a mind of it’s own! 

@gumnut-logic remember when I started this originally to cheer you up. It’s kind of exploded and we’ve traveled down the rabbit hole. Not sure where we will end up, but I’m sure it’ll be a fun ride, right?!

Part 1  | Part 2  | Part 3  | Part 4  | Part 5

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The steady rhythm of a heartbeat disturbed him as he stared out the hospital window of the darkened sky. He would usually welcome the rhythm, whether he was looking for stability in music, art, or life. At this moment, that rhythm was slightly off.

Virgil returned his gaze to the pale figure that laid sleeping in the bed before him. His honey orbs were painfully aware of how young and fragile the eighteen-year-old looked.

It had been touch and go for a while as the youngest Tracy was rushed into surgery to remove the offending objects protruding from his abdomen and patch up the wound. That was hours ago now.

Virgil readjusted the sling that held his newly casted arm. He had fractured both the radius and ulna in his left arm. Closing his eyes as he felt a slight throb from his head, he was thankful for the medication he had been given for his aching head. A moderate concussion had been the diagnosis. The doctors had advised him to remain bedridden for at least another twenty-four hours, but with some coaxing and debate that he would still be in a hospital, he could roam free as long as he rested.

Opening his eyes, he returned his gaze upon his baby brother. Alan hadn’t been as lucky. The remains of the pod frame had thankfully missed any vital organs, but he had lost a lot of blood during surgery. It had taken its toll on the younger pilot. That wasn’t what had Virgil so concerned. It was the lack of response from the ordinarily vibrant teenager. Alan never regained consciousness before he entered surgery. Alan had a severe concussion, and Virgil knew all too well how serious that could be. The doctors reassured they didn’t see any bleeding in the brain, and that only time would tell how severe a knock to the head Alan had taken.

None of it made the Thunderbird 2 pilot feel any better.

“Hey,” Scott said, interrupting his thoughts. The eldest Tracy eyed him with concern as he caught his brother’s gaze. He placed a comforting hand on Virgil’s shoulder. “Alan will be okay.”

“It should’ve been me, Scott,” Virgil whispered. “I let him take the lead.”

“No, Virgil. There’s nothing you could’ve done,” Scott argued. “If this is on anyone, it would be me.”

“Neither one of you get to take the blame for this,” Gordon rebuked, folding his arms across his chest as he leaned back into his chair. “This was a freak accident that none of us could control. If anyone is to blame, it’s the GDF.”

“John said he is handling it. I trust him,” Scott acknowledged. It was no secret how angry he was with the GDF. Due to the hoax call, they were without two pilots for the next 6 to 8 weeks, Alan potentially longer.

“How long before John, Grandma, and Kayo arrive?”

Scott looked at his watch. “They should be here within the hour.”

Virgil walked over and placed himself in the empty chair across from Gordon. Leaning back, he returned his gaze to their unconscious sibling.

-TB-

“Our operative is adamant that he received a positive transmission,” Col. Casey repeated.

“How long has this operative been with the GDF?” Kayo countered.

John met Kayo’s eyes in understanding. “Wouldn’t be the first time the Hood has worked his way into your organization,” the IR space monitor added.

“I assure you, we would know if we had a mole,” Col. Casey scoffed.

“With all due respect, Colonel Casey, you’re going to have to do better than that! Two of our operatives are critically injured because someone else didn’t complete their job,” John fumed, his teal eyes glistening with rage.

Col. Casey paused, calculating her next move. “Let me do some digging, and I’ll get back to you.”

“Please do,” John said and disconnected the call.

“John, I know you’re worried about your brothers, but this isn’t her fault,” Grandma Tracy said, eyeing her grandson with worry.

“Grandma, the GDF is becoming too much of a liability to us. I can’t continue to risk our lives for them when they aren’t being held accountable.”

“This isn’t your fault either, John,” Kayo reminded, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder from the copilot’s seat of the Tracy jet.

“I’m the one that made the decision this was a viable call and not a hoax. This one is definitely on me, too,” John argued, gripping the controls.

Kayo shook her head, groaning as she faced Tracy stubbornness head-on. “If your brothers were here, they’d argue that they collectively agreed to take the risk. It’s what we do, John. Virgil and Alan will be okay.”

“You’ll feel better once you’ve seen them,” Grandma Tracy smiled, standing behind him. “You’ll see, kid.”

“Yeah, maybe…” John nodded and focused on the hospital's coordinates in front of him.

-TB-

Gordon entered the sterile hospital room, smirking as he noticed Virgil’s sleeping head resting upon Alan’s bed. “Finally got him to sleep?” he asked his eldest brother, nodding toward Virgil.

“Refused the couch, so this is a start,” Scott grumbled, gleefully accepting the cup of coffee his brother offered.

“Small wins,” Gordon nodded as he leaned back into the chair he had vacated. He allowed his own tired eyes to stare at the pallor face of his still unconscious little brother.

“How was your call with Lady Penelope?” Scott asked, interrupting the aquanaut’s thoughts.

Gordon smiled. “It was good. Penny sends her best. You were right about John. He isn’t messing around. Apparently, he and Colonel Casey got into it. John asked Penny to do some digging of her own.”

Scott took a sip of his coffee and nodded in satisfaction. “Good for John. I was contemplating doing the same thing.”

Gordon rolled his eyes as his eldest brother’s protective nature began to shine. Taking in a deep breath, the second youngest swallowed some of his own coffee.

“Gordy?”

“I’m fine, Scott. Just worried about Allie is all,” Gordon said, refusing to meet his older brother’s worried blue eyes. “I wish the kid would wake up.”

Scott moved away from his perch by the window and took a seat next to Gordon. “Me too, but Alan’s tough. The last update we got from the doctors sounded hopeful. Alan just needs some rest.”

“Yea, I heard. It’s just so quiet without him buzzing around talking about the next meteor shower. Just last night, he was bugging me about joining him on the roof. I think the next one was supposed to be in three days.” Gordon frowned, rubbing his neck. “I should’ve paid more attention.”

Scott squeezed Gordon’s leg reassuringly. “Allie will be okay, Gordon. The bloodloss just took a lot out of him. He’ll be awake in no time, rattling all of our ears off.”

“I can’t wait to poke fun at that shiner he’s got, though,” Gordon grinned, earning a chuckle from Scott.

“Poor kid does look like he went a round or two, doesn’t he?”

A beep sounded from Scott’s watch, interrupting them. “Grandma, Kayo, and John are here. Will you be okay if I go down and meet them?”

Gordon rolled his eyes once more. “Go on, it’s not like either of them are going anywhere soon,” the second youngest said, eyeing his two sleeping siblings.

“You know that’s not what I meant, Gordon,” Scott said, eyeing his little brother pointedly.

Gordon smirked. “I’m fine, Scooter.”

“Alright,” Scott said, heading toward the door. “I’ll be back before you know it with the rest of the cavalry.”

“Hey, Scott,” Gordon called, causing the eldest to pause. “Thanks. You know…”

Scott smiled. “Don’t mention it.”

TBC...

[anhed-nia]

BLOGTOBER 10/28/2020: HOCUS POCUS (sigh)

I knew that I would not like this movie. I didn't see it as a kid, because we didn't have cable, but it's hard for me to imagine that it would have struck me positively. It's not that I was so sophisticated, but I liked my children's entertainment with a dash of darkness, or at least something challenging--especially if it was supposed to be somehow horror-adjacent. For me, things had to be at least on the level of  LABYRINTH, with its various ambivalent creatures and monster sexuality in the person of David Bowie, or LEGEND, with its various ambivalent creatures and actually-monstrous sexuality in the person of Tim Curry, or...whatever other children's fare there is, that expects a little extra substance from its child audience, that's a little sexy and a little scary, and basically, at least kind of cool. And I'm not being a snob; you can say these same things about a lot of classic Disney movies. But in spite of its dual status as both a Disney- and cult classic, HOCUS POCUS is not at all cool. Just because it's such a Halloween thing for people, I figured I would watch it for Blogtober this year, and I have to say...I still don't get it.

I do not often feel my age, as my continued presence on Tumblr attests. There are just a few things that starkly separate me from my near-peers. One of them is Pokemon; when someone who seems like they're more or less my contemporary starts speaking in a personal way about Pokemon, I know that they're on the exact other side of some invisible dividing line in time. Another sign is enthusiasm for a certain stripe of Nickelodeon production, that mainly seems to feature a lot of shrill screaming and strobing lights and baby talk, in shows I didn't grow up with so I'll never understand what's good about them. It appears to me that HOCUS POCUS is part of the trend here: folks slightly younger than me, who saw it every October on the Disney Channel, seem to really get whatever the appeal of this is.

It is somehow telling that nearly every screencap I could find from this movie is just of these three standing in a row and filling the screen. Like it’s basically the entire visual character of the movie.

What "this" is, is a movie about a kid from LA (Omri Katz) who moves to Salem, Mass, just in time to unwittingly light a ceremonial candle on a Halloween full moon (which we are about to have BTW!), which brings the evil Sanderson Sisters back from the dead. These villains (not victims, VILLAINS) of Salem's witch hunt era can't understand really basic shit like whether plastic tubes are "snakes" or whether asphalt is black water or various other things that should be pretty visually obvious even if you're from the 1600s, but the truth is that it doesn't really matter what they think or feel, because they're just here to shriek and mug and jiggle around and do unwelcome musical numbers. At this point, I really have to apologize; I usually harness myself to the task of thoughtfully describing whatever movie I've assigned myself, no matter what I expect from it, but this was just really difficult.

Ew.

I've read that this movie was originally conceived as more of a kid-friendly horror movie, but it eventually morphed into something more satisfying to the Mouse. Various themes emerge and evaporate, expressing nothing. The "cool" LA native is actually a virgin, which is why his lighting the candle resurrects the witches, but instead of this triggering a coming of age narrative, it just becomes a reason to awkwardly repeat the word "virgin" over and over. Nothing in particular is contributed to our understanding of this character, and I had to wonder if some christian parents' group threatened to picket Disney's witch movie unless it harped on a random virtue like virginity. That would actually follow, given that HOCUS POCUS is a movie that casually sides with witch hunters whose religious mania and misogyny caused the deaths of at least 25 people during the era in which the hilariously kooky Sanderson Sisters are meant to have terrorized the town. Meanwhile, in modern times, their goal is to "steal the lives" of children to create an immortality potion. I don't know why they have to keep saying "steal their lives". It makes no sense to me. I get that maybe they can't say that the Sandersons KILL children--I know this isn't WARLOCK. But it's not even THE WITCHES, in either the Roeg or Zemeckis version; you have little idea what they do to the children. You'd think they could say "steal their souls", or something else that we vaguely understand from watching a lot of movies, but no. HOCUS POCUS just asks a lot from me, in terms of my ability to find it interesting that witches are running around and they must be stopped.

The witches’ grimoire, the best part of the movie, doesn’t have nearly enough to do.

The witches, Kathy Najimy, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Bette Midler, really just run around screaming for most of the movie. I would agree that this must be stopped, and I only regret that it took like 96 minutes for this to happen. I don't even blame the ladies for this movie's lack of charisma; it's pretty clear that they're just doing what a movie this loud and tacky requires. And at my most open-minded, I can acknowledge that it's good for little kids to see female characters who are wacky and confident, and not at all sexy or romantic. But I don't find any of this at all fun, personally. I don't care about the LA virgin who is dressed as a "rap singer" for Halloween, even though he looks more like a white separatist in his fatigue green bomber jacket and dad jeans. I don't care about the talking cat, voiced by Disney standby Jason Marsden who is not really up to the task of doing a british accent. I don't care about bland hot chick Vinessa Shaw, or the cool kid's spunky kid sister, even if she is played by Thora Birch. Doug Jones makes an appearance as a friendly zombie, which could have been fun, but...I shouldn't be surprised that it isn't.

Actually, the only thing I found at all provocative about HOCUS POCUS was the bullies. At first, I did not understand that they were supposed to be bullies. Wannabe rapper "Ice" and his buddy Jay, who by all appearances should be looking around for a church to burn, are unlikely friends and even unlikelier neighborhood threats. When I first saw them, I thought maybe they were going to be the hero's new pals--misfits like himself who have nothing in common but their misfit-ness. But then they shake the kid down for money, and ruin Halloween for little trick-or-treaters, and it's like...oh, these are "bad guys"? Why? Who would ever put up with them? I was alive in a small town during the time that this movie is supposed to take place, and I was very aware of scary teenagers then. The guys in this movie would never have been taken seriously, regardless of physical ability, and worse than that, they do not serve any purpose in this purposeless narrative. Anyway, it's pretty obvious that I don't have much to say about HOCUS POCUS, and watching it was basically a mistake. However, I do have one nutritious morsel to leave you with, courtesy iMDB's trivia page. You can all take heart in the fact that even a really dumb, useless movie can sometimes reveal something about life that you never imagined:

[brokenmusicboxwolfe]

I have a ton of insomnia writing in the drafts, so time to start unloading some of it. The usual “as is” rules apply, and I’ll try to keep most of it under the cut,

It just occured to me that I actually have one piece of good advice to give:

If you challenge someone to a duel, ALWAYS have a witness for the fight!

I learned this the hard way when I was a little girl. But to understand why I felt the need to even duel someone, you need to understand the background.

When I was a little girl my family lived in our house in town, which meant until I was 9 I was running around with a gang of kids. I say “kids”, but I pretty much mean boys. There were a couple of years during that time when a girl was inthe neighborhood, one being one of the best friends I had in my life and the other....not, but almost the entire time I was the only girl in the neighborhood.

Now some folks think being the only girl would be terrible, but in a lot of ways it was fine. Kids are kids, rampaging around the neighborhood, and thanks to my family I never felt things should be “girl stuff” and “boy stuff”. I just played.

 In fact, at times being the only girl even gave me a curious power position. I knew “girl things” they didn’t. I can still remember the shock on the face of one of the boys when I tried to explain that I didn’t just piss outside like them because of anatomical differences. He just assumed girls had dicks too. 

BTW, groups of very little boys can get awfully competitive about their dicks. Not that they called them that. They honest to god called them “ding-a-lings”! LOL  In fact, a few times they even had a contest where they would line up with their pants dropped wanting me (the only one that was exempt)  to decide which looked “best”. Remember, at the time we were very little kids, so the concept of “best” was exceptionally vague.** I hope I didn’t give any of those boys a lifelong complex because of something I said in all innocence! But geez, they were obsessed with the idea that whatever hung between their legs was very, very important.

Anyway, running around playing being a girl among boys wasn’t bad all the time. Heck, while the boys could fight over who got to play Han and Luke when we played “Star Wars” or Mark and Jason when we played “Battle of the Planets”, I always knew I wouldn’t have to compete for my part in the games. Though I’m still a little irked to the way their only solution to Gargantuas in War of the Gargantuas being both male was I’d play “the green Gargantua’s wife, at least we always found a way even if what we were playing didn’t have a token girl.

All that being said, there were real disadvantages too, especially as the bots came to learn the rules around gender. I was a girl. They knew it and at times they would think it meant I was supposed to defer to them. This led to many a fight and tears.

For instance, once one of the boys got a BB gun. 

Naturally we all wanted to take turns using it in a makeshift backyard shooting gallery. Trouble was, as far as they were concerned girls weren’t supposed to shoot. Now considering all the toy cap guns they borrowed from me when we played, and the gun I had that shot cork balls had been the envy of all the kids*** until this BB gun, it seems crazy they would think girls weren’t allowed “real” guns. I begged a turn, outshot them all, and never was allowed to touch the gun again. ****Having a girl be the best shot kinda stung for them! LOL

The boys would do this now and then, throw me for a loop with “you are a girl” as a reason I should or shouldn’t do a thing. Being a “sissy” was a common insult used among the kids. A kid should be tough and brave, try never to get crying or show weakness, or sometimes they would even use “like a girl” as an insult. 

I learned that my “girly” side was more of a target, so I got so in the toy chest in the living room I kept the guns, cars, blocks, etc for the boys to use, but kept hidden away in my bedroom the girly stuff like dolls. In fact I kept things like play makeup buried in drawer where no one could find them...

Yes, I was a girl, both in my personal identification and as the whole world saw me, and yet I hid my “girl stuff” like a teenager hiding drugs or dirty magazines. It was the big drawback of usually being the only girl. The girly side of being a girl was something to be quiet about.

So grew up thinking that the way to impress a guy was to be strong, tough,  smart, brave, and not at all squeamish. If boys admire each other for not being a sissy, then certainly they would admire a girl for being that way.  

Oddly enough, never once did a boy reciprocate my crushes because I wasn’t a sissy. Oh, they would like me for it, but it was seeing me as one of the guys and never as romantic potential. Or maybe not oddly. I may be hetero CIS female, but the world sees me as not girly enough in my presentation to quite believe me.

TBH, I still have a problem with that. I never learned the rules of being girly. I never was taught how to put on makeup, do hair, know about fashion, move in that swaying hips and crossed ankles when you sit kind of way... 

And down deep I don’t want to have to put on that act. I want to be me. I want someone to love me without makeup or styling, not because of the clothes I wear or because of skills with flirting games. I want to be loved for me, and girly is only part of me. Part of me is walks in the woods where I photograph snakes and spiders. Part of me is climbing in the roof to repair a leak or taking apart the hot water heater to figure out how to fix it....

I have always been a combination of things. Things like how I like romantic comedies and horror films, I picked out my antique sword because it felt like it would swing in my hand well and it had little flowers on the hand guard, or how I love classical and punk.I never wear dresses during the day, because they aren’t practical for my rough and dirty life, plus  they can make you very vulnerable. And yet at night I always wear the prettiest nightgown I can find. I had a unique “Captain’s Canopy Bed” as a child, because I loved both the captain’s bed (a bunk woth drawers under it billed as a “boy bed” by people that gender everything) and longed for a canopy bed. My father sensibly combined the two for me. To me it has never been about a contradiction or conflict, but just that different aspects manifest under different circumstances. 

I really can’t understand why people are expected to fit into catagories neatly, label themselves, force themselves to deny parts if themselves just to belong. Still,  I expect I would be happier if I could have at least forced myself to fake it.

Anyway, the boys were learning girls were “supposed” to be a certain way, and I was constantly insisting this wasn’t true. They would pick on me amd we would fight. Oddly, this “girls can’t” attitude never applied to fighting. They never went easier on me because I was a girl. 

Once they got me treed and the henchman boy was told to go get something to hit me with. I warned him not to, but he didn’t listen. As he went to get the weapon I lept out of the tree in a tackle, and began punching him. My grandmother ran out shouting for me to stop. “It’s not ladylike!!” she cried, while  I shouted back in frustration “They were going to hit me!!” 

Don’t worry, I wasn’t punished. Grandma..well, it’s complicated with her...and my parents would never punish me for something like that. Years later Mom would admit she and Pop were proud if me after that fight. “The boys picked on you so much I was glad you hit them”...

Hmmm, now that I think about it, Mom’s most common response to sexist attitudes in movies and tv shows is to grumble “Oh hit him!” Folks have no idea about Mom’s violent side, the part that watched Xena: Warrior Princess and sighed “I always wanted to be able to leap around and fight like that!” People think she is “sweet”, when Pop was always the family softie! LOL

As we got older, the sexism of the boys got worse and so did our conflict. One boy, a year older than me and the oldest of the usual gang, was the worst. His own mother was a rather strong and independent person, so it was almost confusing how he could be that way. As far as he was concerned the social structure was thatthe older the boy the higher the rank, and girls were at the bottom. It was inevitable that one day their would be an explosion.

The final straw came over, of all things, me wanting to make our gang of friends into a club. It was all the fault if a kids magazine called Dynamite, that put out a book on making your own club, complete with membership cards printed in a fold out of the cover you could cut out. It sounded like a great idea. It wasn’t.

To be honest, I shouldn’t have been at all surprised. By this point the oldest boy had gotten to be a complete pain about gender roles, but also about me in particular. My first day of kindergarten he’d been the only person I knew all day, so when I passed him in the hall I’d said “Hello”. The boy next to him asked who I was and he said “I don’t know!” right in front of me. I had started to consider our “friendship” differently after that, and his now increased insistence that boys were superior increased the rift.

To make matters worse, the boys had developed some sort of age based ranking. When I invited the oldest boy’s little brother to come to the club meeting too, the guy had been outraged. It had seemed natural to me, I mean I invited my little brother. I always wanted to include everyone. To the boys, the younger boys didn’t count and the older you were the more power you were “supposed” to have.

Now for the club I’d fixed up a corner of the shed out back. I put up posters, made a candle (I just loved making candles and melting wax when I was little...us GenXers lived dangerous lives!LOL), set up chairs and a table, had refreshments and, of course, the membership cards. I couldn’t wait for them to show up.

Once the boys arrived I said it was time to elect officers. Immediately the oldest boy announced there was no need and started to pass out the cards. He said he would be president because he was oldest, my favorite boy would be vice president, the thieving henchman would be treasurer because he was next oldest, the other boys would be just members, and I would be...secretary. 

Oh he was glad to explain. Girls are always secretaries. Only girls can be secretaries. Girls can never be president. The other boys accepted this.

Naturally I was outraged. This was NOT right! We were supposed to vote! And we were supposed to vote for who would be best for the job, not who was oldest or a boy. Girls CAN be president! And besides, the club was my idea and the clubhouse in my yard so I shouldn’t be stuck being the stupid secretary without even voting!!!!

There was a lot of shouting after that. The boys stormed off, taking the cards with them. I went in the house to take the refreshments, and the boys snuck back to trash the place. They tore the posters, smashed my candle, and turned over the furniture. 

I cried.

I was also furious.

I was beyond fed up with the oldest boy and his assumption of leadership. Now my favorite boy did apologize, but he was always the nice one. The others were unrepentant. The oldest boy insisted he was right that girls could never lead. 

There was only one thing left to do: Challenge the oldest boy to a duel.

I went right up to him and said I’d had enough. I was challenging him to a fight. One on one, just him and me. No weapons, just our strength. The winner would be the leader of the kids.

I know it’s absurd, but since physical fighting is what they valued I figured I had to go with it. Actually, if anything, a fight would be skewed in my favor. While the boy was a year older, I was a head taller. Where he was lanky, I’d gotten to be a sort of muscular and agile fat.***** Physically the avantage was mine, an since refusing to fight me would be so embarrassing to him I knew I’d get the fight. 

He agreed, and then I made a very stupid mistake. I decided to show him a bit of mercy. Since losing to a girl would be so humilating, I set the time and place where we would meet alone for our fight. I wanted to win, to make my point, but  I wasn’t trying to shame him.

And so the time came. We met in a back yard, in clear area  hidden from windows in case an adult was looking by trees. I wish I could tell you some dramatic blow by blow, but honestly I remember it as very quick. He fancied he knew fighting moves, got into a pose, and I flattened him. Almost admittedly I had him pinned to the ground where I sat on top of him until he admitted I had won. 

I went home overjoyed. This lasted until the kids got together. I, oh so foolishly, assumed I was now leader. The boy, however, was not about to give up power...or tell the truth. 

As an adult I realize my naivety, but at the time I was 7 or 8. I honestly had believed the boy would have been honest. I always told the truth, so why wouldn’t he? And since we had made a sort of “official” deal, he would be obliged to tell the truth. 

He lied. Right there, right in front of me, he lied. 

The boy announced he had won. I said he was lying, that I had won, and he laughed. Of course he had won. He was a boy. Did the boys really think  a girl could beat him?

 I offered to fight him again right there, but he refused saying he’d already won. I couldn’t get him to feel pressured to fight me again because now the boys wouldn’t really want him to. On some level I think they believed me and knew I would win if we fought again. As long as they didn’t see me clobber him they could pretend the boys “deserved” to be in charge. They needed the lie as much as he did.

And so I learned a lesson: witneses matter. People will almost always lie if the truth threatens them. 

You know, I think this is why I have always been obsessed with watching when something horrible is happening. I always had this feeling that even when I can’t help, I can be there for the person in some way. I’d listen, watch, and remember. When I was 9 I stood in the snow, no coat and no socks, waiting until a man was removed from a crashed car because I didn’t want to “abandon” him. I would report teachers that did something incredibly wrong, even though I knew the teacher would deny it and I knew my classmates were too afraid to back me up, because the truth had to be known. I wanted to be the witness I needed for that fight, someone to back me up when no one wants to hear the truth.

As a footnote, after the duel failed I tried one more way to defeat the oldest boy: Voodoo!

Well, voodoo by way of a book I’d been reading. It wasn’t real voodoo, or probably like any realistic magical practices. In the book someone had carved a skull into a tree, written someone’s name under it, and the  hammered a nail into the center of the skull with devastating consequences to the victim. I had a pocket knife and a nail, so I gave it a go.

Sadly voodoo didn’t work. 

Even more sadly the boy grew up to move away from this hick town, get a good job, get married and have kids. In other words, he got a far better life than I’ve had. Oh well, the universe never cares about fairness.

** Actually one boy always won, because TBH I liked everything about him best.

***Hilariously, one of the boys tried to steal my cork gun, claiming it was his. Pop had engraved my name in the gun sight, and when my father pointed at to ask what it said, the boy claimed it was his name! That boy was never very bright, always dishonest, and a born henchman! LOL You know, I bet that toy gun would have been illegal to make just a few years later, just because it literally fired things. Heck, maybe it already was and had been sitting on the store shelf for years before I got it. We couldn’t find one like it a coulle years later for my little brother.... 

****I want to point out being a good shot runs in the family. Back in the 1960s when my family had to shoot for self defense (long story) Mom was apparently a crack shot. On one side of her family she has had relatives that were at times the official best shot for their branch of the military. One, even as an old man in poor health, liked to show off how he could selectively shoot off small tree top branches a long diatance uphill from him. Plus, Mom likes to mention she is distantly related to Annie Oakley, which is apparenty true.

*****Traumatic stuff happened when I started school, triggering a bunch of sudden changes with me. One was weight gain, but I had stayed strong as ever. 

[fafulous]

Bucky and Steve helping you out on your bad day + you helping out their's would include:

Pairing: Poly!Stucky x Reader

Warnings: Flufffffffff and some nakedness, that's all.

You loved your boys just as much as they loved you. You three would always help out each other after a stressful, bad day.

But in the initial days of dating, you were not sure if you should be too vocal about your feelings

And hence you try really hard to not to tell them whenever you had a bad day

whether it be because of work, family or your stupid period mood swings, you’d hide it

but Steve and Bucky were much more intuitive than you

Then one day, they noticed how silent you were, retreating into the room once you entered the house.

Only for them to find you curled into a fetal position, arms wrapped around yourself onto their bed in the gloomy room. 

You had turned off the lights, except for the fairy lights that Bucky had gifted you.

You, on the other hand, didn’t want to cry in front of them 

So you let those tears run down your face in the warmth of their sheets.

It sunk their heart so much, they didn’t think twice about rushing towards you, with both of them on either side of you.

You immediately stiffened and closed your eyes the minute you felt the warm embraces of your boys

While Bucky slowly wrapped his arm around your hip with his face near your ear, Steve lied down beside you and looked at you with all the warmth he could muster and wiped the tears falling on your cheek 

“Doll, what happened?” 

“You know you can tell us anything right?”

And that was enough to break you down to cry your heart out

Bucky’s arm tightened around you and kept whispering “shhh, its okay baby. It's okay”

And they waited for you patiently to get to your senses and explain what had happened

And when you explained it was your family being mean to you, the two soldiers realized that they were useless 

They can’t punch the hell out of your family, can they?

But they were your boys and they always chose to be partial to you

“Let them be baby, you got us now”

"Cheer up doll. Next time don't hide anything to us, no matter how small it is"

"Now smile for us please?"

And you did, pulling the both of em into a hug

And pecking their cheeks lovingly, instead of a cliche thank you.

While one of them would go ahead and make you your favorite comfort food, the other would forcefully make you sit on his lap and keep you occupied

With a story or some tickles or a few kisses here and there

As long as you giggled and smiled, anything was okay for them.

This time it was you sitting on Bucky's lap, who was whispering sweet nothings into your ear

And Steve made your favorite comfort food and somehow ended up feeding you

You felt like a child, being pampered to an extreme by your very own super soldiers. But you loved every single minute of it. Extremely grateful too.

They’d be courteous to ask you if you wanted to do anything else

“Watch a Disney movie maybe? Scroll through a few me-mees?”

“It’s all okay Bucky, I like just sitting with you both” (Though you fought the urge to correct Bucky’s pronunciation of memes)

They’d be a Gentleman if you were on your period, getting everything you wanted. Hot packs, pills, and cuddles.

Bucky almost bought fifty kinds of chocolate, only to be stopped by Steve.

“A few are enough buck. Y/N ain’t a vending machine”

and god save you if you had a bad day when they were on a mission because you had no idea how to get over it without them

You’d end up wearing their clothes the whole day, that way it felt like they were there with you.

It deadass creepy whenever you think about it, but those two have grown over you.

There’s something about wearing your loved one's clothes ain't it?

But they were just a phone call away. If you were extremely lucky, then just a video call away 

And they’d only hang up once you fall asleep.

Sometimes you’d just want to cuddle in between them, with the lights off.

Squished between your boys because the warmth made you so happy

But also because Pillow Talk with your boys was a chaotic conversation of random things

“Yanno Doll, the first time I kissed Steve, he said thank you.”

“Oh cut some slack Bucky, I’m sure he was trying to be nice”

“Nice people also don’t run away after kissing”

“You did what nOW STEVE?”

Little did you see Steve and Bucky high fiving each other stealthily

They’d do anything to see you giggling and happy, anything.

+ Comforting Steve’s and Bucky’s Rough Days:

Both Steve and Bucky had their fair share of rough days

or rough nights rather

Nightmares were a constant companion in your lovers’ life and it was because of their line of work. 

You would never know if Steve had a nightmare because he would wake up instantly and get out of the room

And as your relationship grew, both you and Bucky knew when Steve was out of the bed

You both would find Steve sitting on the sofa alone, either fidgetting or sketching something rapidly

“Hey, sweetie you okay?”

Steve wouldn’t reply, but Bucky would ensure he did.

While Steve finally made an attempt to talk about his nightmare, cuddling with Bucky, you would quickly stir up a cup of tea, which you knew soothed his senses

And he’d feel better the next minute.

“Thank you love”

“Anything for you Cap”

Nothing can cure a nightmare like some good tea and hugs

But Bucky’s was the worst, dreaming of the old Winter Soldiers days where in which he was forced to hurt you and Steve (both in real life as well as in the dreams, unfortunately)

His whimperings and unconscious sobs would wake both of you up

And you’d slowly try to wake him up without startling him.

“Bucky, Buck wake up for me please,”

“It's me, Steve, wake up Bucky”

And he would but with so much tremor and strain. It sunk both of your hearts.

“Stevie...Y/N...”

And he’d just lunge at the both of you simultaneously, hugging you so tightly.

“I..thought...I k-killed you both...w-with my m-metal...”

“Shh, don’t think about anything, baby. We’re right here beside you”

He was like a child when he had nightmares, frightened and lost.

And wouldn’t remember he had such a nightmare the next day when he woke up

It is easy to lull Bucky to sleep after such episodes. Bucky would just nuzzle himself into the crook of your neck or Steve’s and would sleep off instantly

Steve admitted that no one could handle his demons like you did

“What would we do without you, doll?”

“That's irrelevant. I’ll always be there and that’s all that matters.”

When Steve and Bucky came back from a mission, they’d mostly be tired and cuddle you off to sleep

But then one day, a mission went off awfully wrong, which made them sulk the entire day.

And you knew what would cheer up your boys

While they were caught in their own squabble, you decided to run a warm bath for them. 

And that bathtub was big enough to accommodate the three of you

They’d never agree but they loved scented candles, especially good ol’ Vanilla. Boys.

They didn’t even notice you entering and leaving the kitchen with three glasses and a bottle of wine.

That's how low and silent they were in spite of it all being over

And you felt sad every time you saw them like that

So you had to improvise.

“Boys! Can you please come up fast?”

They literally came running into the warm bathroom, thinking that you were in some trouble...

Only to find you in your black silk robe, smiling. And you looked ethereal with the candlelight illuminating the room. They had their usual reaction whenever they saw you

They froze.

“Woah babe”

“Y-you look”

“Hush now. The first one to get in this bathtub gets to undo this robe of mine”

And they obeyed, stripping off their suits right in front of you, smirking like two teenagers. (Steve won btw and placed you into the tub before getting in)

Bucky caught ahold of you, kissing your sweet spot, whispering things not meant for everyone to hear 

“Doll, you didn’t have to do this”

“I’d do anything to take those frowns off your faces.”

After sharing a passionate kiss with both your boys, Steve and Bucky raised their glasses

“To rough days”

“And to Y/N taking us through them”

No matter how rough times were, you knew you three had each other, always.

---

A/N: I hope y’all liked it, esp since it was an emotional rush for me writing this one.Thank you so much for reading. I make Headcanons every week. This was my second one. My first one was “Life with Bucky in Wakanda” and you can read it if you want to. 

I also have Taglists so please do let me know if you wish to be tagged for Bucky and Stucky HCs. Thank you and Have a great day!

Tag list:  @padmaaavati @scarsout @xbabykookiix @butimthekingofhell @urbanbts @lookinsidemyhead @minimoose23 @the-real-smol-bean

[greekgeek21]

The Codependency Competition Ch. 10

Ok, so I just realized that I'm way over 1M readers if I add all of the websites I have this story on together. And I'm in shock. You guys are so great, and I love the support I always get. It's really reassuring to have people say that they like my story because, to be honest, I was really nervous about posting this story. And now that we're on the last chapter, it's a little surreal to have so much recognition. But enough of the sappy stuff. I can do that after the actual chapter. So be ready for the spillage of my heart. Oh and the pic at the top does not mean anything, just in case anyone is hyperventilating right now.  

Also, I just got a new keyboard for my monitor and I'm not quite used to it yet, so if I make a mistake, please don't point it out. I appreciate it. That's also why this chapter took longer than usual to finish BTW.

Oh and if you still reading these, good for you! Not like you wanted to know or anything, but I'm eating a whole lot of Sour Punches right now. It's extremely unhealthy, but do I care in the slightest? No. Not at all.

Stay safe and happy reading!

– your author

P.S. go to FF and answer my poll there. My name is Ocean.breezzq cuz for some reason they don't allow underscores on FF.

ΩΩΩ

How did he end up in this position? Honestly, Percy could not for the life of him figure out how he got himself into this one.

He is currently standing in front of a full-length mirror, with his mother trying to figure out which tie he should wear. They had narrowed it down to two: a deep blue or a thin black one. He didn't see how it mattered, but apparently it does because his mom had been fussing over it for the past ten minutes. He was about ready to just not wear one. It was already bad enough to have to wear a dress shirt and pants (he had adamantly refused to wear anything but his converse).

But of course he was standing around and taking it because it was what Annabeth wanted, and what Annabeth wants, she usually gets.

"Mom! Just choose already! At this rate, we're gonna miss the dance altogether!" he exclaimed.

Sally sighed, "Oh, Percy. I can guarantee that you're going to be a little bit late. Annabeth still has a lot to do before you kids can leave!

He resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Clearly, his mom did NOT know Annabeth. She's the farthest thing from a girly-girl, only Clarisse could beat her. There's no way that she's fussing about getting ready as much as his mom is. If anything, she's already done and is just sitting in their room watching Youtube. Yeah, that's what she's doing...

That was NOT what she was doing.

In fact, Sally wasn't far off. Annabeth was on a FaceTime call with Piper, Thalia, and Hazel trying to figure out which lipgloss she should wear. She already had her hair and dress done. Her hair was styled in just a simple French braid, and her dress was nothing special. She was sure it cost a lot, but Sally hadn't let her see the price tag.

As soon as her and Percy had agreed to going to the dance, Sally had dragged to the mall to find a dress. She seemed so excited, so Annabeth had just let her shove dress after dress onto her until they found "the perfect match." Whatever that meant.

Anyway, Annabeth had only called her friends because she wanted to get their opinion on how she looked. However, she had ended up getting into an argument about when the appropriate time for makeup was. In her opinion, it wasn't required for school dances. Piper and Thalia thought differently. Hazel didn't want to voice her opinion because she was still getting used to common modern practices.

And that's how she ended up here, fretting over what lipgloss she should use. Sally had let her borrow her makeup bag because Annabeth's consisted of a single tube of mascara and an unused clear lip gloss.

Piper thought that she should use the pink lip gloss that Sally gave her, but Annabeth didn't want to be too flashy, so she wanted the clear one.

"You NEED to use the pink one, Annabeth!" Piper said.

"You already forced me into putting on mascara and blush, so I don't think you have the right to make me use the pink one," Annabeth stated factually.

"Oh my gods, 'Beth! Can't you just use the pink and get it over with? This conversation is exhausting," Thalia sighed.

Annabeth resisted the urge to stomp her foot like a child and responded with, "No! I can't! It's my body, so my decision!"

Piper was almost literally pulling her own hair out, but she told Annabeth in a deadly calm voice to "Put on the dam pink lip gloss before I charmspeak you into doing it."

Figuring it was an endless cycle, Annabeth just sighed and applied the pink lipgloss. When she finished, she stood back from the mirror, and gave herself a once-over. She would never admit it, but the pink kinda looked good.

"Happy?" she asked Piper.

"Extremely," was the deadpan reply.

"Ok, guys. I've gotta go. Talk to you later," Annabeth said, moving to sign-off.

Before she could, Thalia screeched, "Don't forget to tell me what Percy's reaction is! I want details!"

"Yeah, sure, Thals," she said and finally ended the call.

That was exhausting. And she still had a long night ahead of her. Great. Why did she want to do this again?

Back with Percy, his mom had chosen the deep blue tie. She said it brought out his eyes, or something like that. He honestly started tuning out what she was saying after she mentioned hair gel.

They had thirty minutes until the dance started, so he wasn't exactly joyous. In his ADHD brain, he was wondering if there was some way that he could skip the dance without being in trouble. Probably not.

And that's when he saw her.

She looked more than beautiful in her grey and gold dress and silver heels. Percy was pretty sure that his mouth was hanging open, but he physically could not close it. Sure, he'd seen Annabeth a little dressed up before, but never like this. For one thing, she'd never worn heels before.

He was speechless.

"You're drooling, Seaweed Brain," Annabeth stated, walking up to him.

That shocked him out of his reverie, "Huh? Oh! You look amazing, Wise Girl."

Annabeth laughed. It sounded so carefree, but on the inside, she was a nervous wreck. Just as she was about to walk out to meet Percy, butterflies swarmed her stomach. There were so many ways this could go wrong, and she hadn't even thought past seeing Percy yet!

"Thanks, Perce," she said, a little tersely.

Percy picked up on her mood, "Relax, 'Beth. Everything'll be fine. This was your plan, remember?"

"Yeah, you're right. Athena always has a plan. We're going to be fine," thought she sounded like she was trying to convince herself more than anyone else.

They both turned to leave, but was abruptly stopped by a yell of protest from Sally, "Just where do you two think you're going? We still have to do pictures!"

Percy groaned, and Annabeth looked like she was trying to suppress one. Sally is great and loving, and kind, but she could be really embarrassing sometimes (especially when it came to Percy).

"Really, Mom?" Percy asked, turning back around to face his mother.

Sally sighed, 'Teenagers', she thought.

"Yes, really. This is one of the few times you get to act like a normal teenager, and I want to capture the moment ," she responded, "Plus, this'll be useful when you get married!"

Both Percy and Annabeth blushed bright red. Leave it to Sally Jackson to make a perfectly casual dance into a conversation about marriage.

Even so, they stood through the seemingly endless amount of photos. Once they were finished, Percy was practically dragging Annabeth away from his mother. The faster they got out of there, the least likely they would be ambushed for pictures again.

In the car, Paul's Prius, they were discussing their plan for the night.

"Ok, so what's the game plan?" Percy asked Annabeth, keeping his eyes on the road. (safety first kids!)

Annabeth sighed at her boyfriend's immaturity, but answered nonetheless, "We act like everything is normal. Well, our usual normal. We show up together, and stay together. Got it?"

"Yeah, I think so," he answered.

"Good, because I made it foolproof for your sake, Seaweed Brain," Annabeth teased, taking one of Percy's hands in hers.

Percy grinned that dopey grin that always made her heart melt, and then her mind clouded over, as per usual. How can he have this effect on me?, Annabeth wondered as she struggled to come back to herself.

Unbeknownst to her, Percy knew exactly what he was doing. It was all part of his charm, as Leo so tactfully put it once. Slowly, Percy was coming to realize what little action he could do to break through that rough shell that surrounded Annabeth. Not many people could claim to have that ability, so he was grateful he was one of the chosen few. Then again, they had been best friends for almost six years. He had some experience to put it lightly.

Anyway, they were almost at school. Time seemed to slow down as they pulled into Goode High's parking lot. Every step towards the gym–which was where the dance was being held–seemed to last an hour. The anticipation was rising in both of the demigods.

Percy and Annabeth both looked over at each other for comfort at the exact same time, as if their thoughts were one and the same. They didn't even have to speak for them to understand what was going through the other's head. They were both nervous beyond belief.

As they approached the double doors with colorful lights pouring out from under it, Percy squeezed Annabeth's hand, glancing at her and asking, "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be," she muttered, reaching to open the doors.

Annabeth wasn't sure what she was expecting...maybe a movie moment where the music stops and everyone moves to stare at them? Or for everyone to start bombarding them with questions as soon as they stepped through the door? Whatever its as, she was sure it couldn't have been what happened.

Nobody noticed them.

The dance just continued as if nothing had happened. Maybe one person here or there would do a double-take at seeing Percy Jackson with his arm wrapped securely around Annabeth Chase's waist, but nothing more than that.

It was all very disconcerting. Or maybe the proper word would be anticlimactic? Yeah, that sounded better in Annabeth's head...

Oh! There she goes again, letting her control slip from her ADHD brain! Get a grip, Annabeth!, she practically screamed in her head.

She hadn't even realized that Percy was pulling her by the hand somewhere until they had already got there. He had spotted their friends talking to each other at one of the tables. That brought another question to mind: When did that happen?

"Hey, guys!" Percy greeted, high-fiving one of his friends (Annabeth was pretty sure it was the one named Jack), "What's up?"

All of their friends gave Percy incredulous looks. Percy was just trying to act normal, like Annabeth said, but apparently they hadn't gotten the memo.

"What's up? What's up?! You too are dating, and you're just acting like it's no big deal!" Nora exclaimed.

Oh, that's right. Most of Annabeth's friends hadn't been briefed completely. They must still be stuck in the shock of the reveal. Annabeth wasn't sure why they were making such a big out of it. It wasn't like they had announced they were getting married, or anything. They were just dating. What's so surprising about that?

And Annabeth asked exactly that, in her best accusatory tone.

Nora looked a little shocked before stuttering out a response, "Well-I mean-um...he's him and you're you!"

Not the best answer, Nora, Percy thought before grabbing Annabeth before she decided to gut her friend. He made it look like he had just casually given her a hug, but if you looked closely you could see how Annabeth's nails were digging into his wrists.

"Easy there, 'Beth. She didn't know what she was saying," Percy whispered in his murderous girlfriend's ear.

With one deep breath, Annabeth relaxed her rigid posture, finally letting it go.

"I apologize for keeping something as big as a relationship from you. I hope you can forgive me," she forced out in a robotic voice, clearly rehearsed beforehand.

Percy smirked, but didn't comment on it. He just went over to talk to his friends while Annabeth caught her group up on everything.

The rest of the dance went pretty smoothly. There was SOME dancing, but not much. Annabeth and Percy may have improved on their dancing skills slightly since Westover Hall, but it was still a little awkward. Even after almost 2 years of dating...

Just as they were about to retire for the night, the casual mood changed. Well, more like the entire gym's atmosphere darkened.

Kelsey Evans was blocking Percy and Annabeth's path.

Annabeth outwardly groaned when Kelsey started to advance toward them. Just as things were seeming like they would work out fine, the devil incarnate had to show up.

"Hey, Percy!" Kelsey chirped with her too-high voice.

"Hi, Kelsey. We were just on our way out, so can you move please? Or is there something you wanted to say first?" Percy asked, strangely diplomatic.

"Well, you see. I've been hearing about some CRAZY rumor going around that says that YOU are dating HER," she answered, saying 'her' with an expression of disgust.

Annabeth internally seethed. She was having to dig her nails into her palms just to keep herself at bay. She was so close to snapping, it's a wonder Kelsey was still breathing.

"It isn't a rumor. We are dating, and have been for almost two years. Can you move out of our way now?" Annabeth said, forcing herself to not call Kelsey some nasty words in Greek.

Kelsey faced Annabeth, her flirty look changing into a pitiful glare, "No. You don't deserve him! He belongs to me!"

Even Percy was having a hard time not punching the girl, and he's been taught not to hurt women that can't defend themselves. Well, that last part was added after he had first sparred with Annabeth.

"First of all, back off. Second of all, Percy isn't an object, he's a person. More specifically, he's my person, so you can go away now before I do something I can guarantee I won't regret," Annabeth walked up close to Kelsey, voice deadly calm.

Of course Annabeth was aware of the crowd around them forming, but that wasn't going to stop her. After 'that place' nothing could scare her up here, especially not a weak mortal girl.

Before Kelsey could respond, Annabeth shoved her out of the way and tugged Percy through the door.

Nobody spoke for a long time, but eventually Percy got up the courage to say something, "That was BA."

Annabeth smirked but didn't say anything. She was still coming down from her adrenaline/anger high, and she was afraid that what came out of her mouth would start a fight, even if it was with Percy.

Then Percy couldn't think of anything else to say, so he just shut up. At least, he did until they were changing out of their formal clothes into their pajamas. Annabeth was in their room, and Percy was in the bathroom.

"Are you done?" he asked.

"Yeah, come in," Annabeth responded.

Percy then walked in, threw his clothes somewhere near his overflowing hamper, and plopped down on the bed next to Annabeth. She was sitting up in bed reading some architecture book that he could never understand.

"Hi," he said, turning onto his side and looking up at her.

"Hello, Seaweed Brain," she said, not even glancing up from the words.

Percy sighed, So it's gonna be one of THOSE conversations, huh?

"You know I love you, right?" he asked, smirking his troublemaker smirk.

This tactic usually works the best when he's stuck in these situations.

A small smile played on Annabeth's lips, but she still refused to look up. However, she did respond with, "Yes, and I love you, too."

Percy pouted, stumped. What is so exciting about architecture? The only thing he likes about it is the way Annabeth's eyes light up as she rants about some random building he's never heard of before. That's the only reason he puts up with it. Or it's the only reason he'll admit to, anyway.

Just then, an idea popped into his head. And when ideas pop into Percy's head, everyone within a five-mile radius better clear out cuz' they can be destructive. However, this one was not that bad.

He gave Annabeth a light peck on her cheek, then slowly moved down to her jaw, then her earlobe, and then her neck. He could tell that it was starting to get to her because she hadn't turned the page for a while.

"Percy...," she warned.

He just smiled against her neck. Annabeth rolled her eyes, but relented. She set her book on the bedside table, and turned over to face Percy, giving him a deep, passionate kiss.

She pulled away for a second, "You're such a Seaweed Brain, you know that?"

She only saw a glimpse of his dopey smile before she went back to kissing the love of her life, stress nonexistent in her mind.

ΩΩΩ

Omg omg omg! It's over! I don't even know what to say! I just want to thank all of you guys, my wonderfully supportive readings, especially the ones who've been here since the beginning. You guys are amazing. I don't even know if I would've been able to make this story without the encouragement from you. So thanks.

Now, I think that's all the sappy stuff. I'm looking for a good beta, so if you are or know one who might be interested, please let me know. I'm also going to shamelessly promote my original series. Go check out "Secret Powers" and "Frozen Secrets"! They are the first two books in my three story series.

If you want to know this is Annabeth's dress and shoes from the dance:

Now for the good stuff. Somebody mentioned that they would be interested in a Percabeth proposal, so I'm going to give it to you. Here's a little BONUS SCENE set in their future, but I'm not giving it a specific date, so use your imaginations and decide for yourself. Hope you like it!

ΩΩΩ

Percy and Annabeth were visiting Camp Half-blood, and they were enjoying a nighttime walk along the beach. Annabeth was remembering all of the wonderful memories she had at this beach. Her underwater kiss with Percy, birthdays, all of her dates with Percy. Nothing but happiness came with being at the beach when you love a son of Poseidon.

Percy was in a completely different headspace. His mind was full of nervousness and worry. He was so distracted that he didn't even realize when Annabeth stopped and turned to look out at the water. When he bumped into her, she just gave him a weird look and went back to her previous position.

His hand was distractedly fidgeting with the small, velvet box in his pocket. It felt like it weighed more than the sky, and he should know! What if she says no? What if I mess up? What if the ring doesn't fit? Oh, gods, she's going to say no!

Those were the thoughts swirling around in his brain, making it a whirlpool of stress. He knows that Annabeth loves him, and that he loves her, but she could still say no!

"Seaweed Brain? Earth to Seaweed Brain! Percy?" Annabeth's concerned expression brought him back to reality.

"Huh? Oh, fine. Just-I'm fine!" he said quickly.

She gave him an unimpressed look, but didn't push it. Truthfully, Annabeth had noticed his odd behavior recently, but she still hadn't figured out what was bothering him. But, she knew that he would tell her eventually, so she was REALLY trying not to figure it out beforehand. The last time he'd been this nervous, he was asking her to move in with her!

Ten minutes passed before Percy worked up the courage to do it. His reasoning was that he just had to get it over with. Annabeth's told him she loves him so many times, why would she say no? There was nothing to worry about! Nothing!

"Hey, Wise Girl?" he asked, turning to face her fully.

"Hmm?" she hummed.

He was about to just ask the question, but his stupid Seaweed Brain got there first, "Wanna go for a swim?"

Annabeth furrowed her eyebrows, "Umm...it's 7:30 PM and I'm not wearing a bathing suit. What about this scenario makes you think that we should go swimming?"

Percy decided that he might as well work with what he's got so he went with the first backup plan that came to mind: the best underwater kiss of all time. Ok, not the ACTUAL one, but he could make another air bubble. It's not like he hadn't done it before.

"I'll keep it warm and dry, I promise. Come on! It'll be fun!" he started pulling her towards the water, himself already ankle-deep.

Annabeth started to protest, but he had already gotten her in enough for him to be able to pull her in with his powers. And just as promised, she was still completely dry. She could feel the water on her skin, but it wasn't wet. She had long-since gotten used to the feeling, after so many years of dating Percy, but it still shocked her for the first couple of seconds.

"Fine," she said, and Percy pulled them both all the way under, quickly forming a bubble of air around them.

"I love you," slipped out of his mouth.

It wasn't like it was a big deal, but the way he said it, with so much love, froze Annabeth. What is he planning?, she thought.

An idea began to form in her head, but she pushed it away instantly. Better not to get her hopes up. That way there's no chance of disappointment.

"I love you, too, Seaweed Brain," she said, trying to slip back into her casual tone of voice.

They sat in a silence for about a minute, just watching the scenery around them, before Percy finally ACTUALLY worked up the courage to do it.

"I've been thinking..." he started.

"Uh-oh," Annabeth teased with a smile.

"About us. And our future," Percy said.

Annabeth instantly sobered. He sounded serious, and a serious Percy was a SERIOUS Percy. There was no in-between.

"Yeah?"

Percy took a deep breath, "Yeah. And I know we're a little young, but we've been together for so long, and I just think that it's time. And you've always wanted something permanent, and I want to be that for you. I want us to be that for you. So, Annabeth Chase...will you make me the happiest demigod in the world and marry me?"

It might not seem like much, but to Annabeth, it meant the world. This was exactly what she had been dreaming of for her entire life. She was so full of emotions that she could barely speak, but she was able to get one word out...

"Yes."

ΩΩΩ

Ok, that's it! I'm officially done with this fanfic! I feel like I could've gone on in the bonus scene, but I think that you guys should get to come up with your own version of their happily-ever-after. Anyway, there's a poll on FF and you should go do. It's about my next story.

And you guys know I need to give special recognition to my amazing beta reader! JJ, you took me on when I refused to edit my own work, and you made everything WAY better! You should ALL go check out nightskywithrainbows on Ao3. They write, beta, AND are a student! So kudos to you, JJ! You're the best!

I hope you enjoyed this! Stay safe and happy reading!

- your author