#this is long bc it's an interesting topic i think

[shrimpmandan]

In fairness: it is very possible to fall in love with someone who doesn't meet your sexual needs. Maybe you have vastly differing libidos, or maybe your kinks and preferences don't quite line up with your partner's. Maybe they have a sexual dysfunction or trauma. That's fine and normal. With good communication, it can be worked around. This sort of thing happens in allosexual relationships all the time. I also find it strange to position the goal of dating as being to find someone who perfectly lines up with your own sexuality, though that probably isn't exactly what you meant. (I'm also ignoring polyamory here because it kind of removes the issue entirely.)

It's not that allo/ace relationships can never work. It's that a lot of people are biased towards the idea of their ace partner having sex with them anyways because "they don't mind", or even because "I can fix them". The issues arise when allos don't consider that-- hey, maybe they don't need sex to have a functional relationship. Maybe they can compromise. Horny? Masturbate. Craving intimacy? Cuddle. Need both? A lot of (though not all) asexuals are into nonsexual kink. You can still fulfill that need in your relationship, without the asexual partner always having to be the one to compromise. That's why I've personally always disdained the narrative of asexuals having sex to "make their partner happy". Why do we never hear anything of their partners engaging in forms of nonsexual intimacy for the sake of their asexual partner? Why is the action of having sex with your partner seen as an inherent service to them that's simply being withheld?

Obviously this is a massive oversimplification. Sure, some asexuals do like sex. Sure, some allosexuals absolutely need traditional sex in their relationships. The critique is not with individuals, but rather how general society views asexuality, attempting to minimize its threat towards the traditional cishet norm, by making it seem like being ace doesn't actually make a meaningful difference in your life. "It's okay that people are asexual. Asexuals can be normal too."

It's always, "aces can still have sex" but never, "allos can go without sex"

Kinda makes it feel like aces *have* to be the ones to compromise in allo/ace relationships

[nosakamihos]

It's too late for me gang I'm already writing fan episodes in my head about malik having a vague mostly-for-jokes potential romance with miho in s0

[woodsborostabathon]

coworker asked me today if id seen all the scream movies including the sequels then started recapping 5-vi for me like she assumed i hadnt…

[13thdoodle]

bunch of Phantasy AU doodles n wip from earlier this year

Basically I just found out this year that ball-jointed dolls actually have strings in them and not just... magically attached by the ball joints themselves? And 31 in this AU is a ball jointed doll that were made out of Danny's energy so here we are :3c

I've been watching a lot of doll customization since earlier this year and found out from dollightful's video that no they are all connected by elastic strings inside so that's where the idea came from

...i was looking on google to find a good example to put here and clearly I'm not exactly paying attention to how the main body strings are actually.. pinned to?

the video I've been watching the most is dollightful n moonlight jewel and they have their bjd usually only to the bottom of the doll head instead of all the way to the top on the skull pin like the diagram above

Which is why 31 has his strings all connected to the 'heart' in the middle instead of the head kasjdnkasjnd

But yeah uhhh specifics aside...

----

Those ball jointed dolls made me think of 31, and then thinking about the clones in Phantasy AU and like.. the logistic of it

for 31, the idea is that during the circus gothica arc for this AU, Danny actually got kidnapped all the whole way into another universe/plane in which he met Valeska (Enn's oc) who unalive what his face the circus leader n break Danny's hypnosis

and now that Danny is essentially stuck in a whole other plane/realm/or sth he just following Valeska hoping she'll help him find his way back.

In one such trip, Danny got kidnapped (again) by another group/cult who wanted to use his power/energy as a gate keeper to the ghost zone to make their own gate keeper so they can open portals to ghost zones and maybe other realms too

31 is part of the experiments. He's a doll made with part of Danny's energy as his core.

And then it's.. uhh.. sth sth Valeska finally found out where they kept Danny and devour everyone there safe from Danny n 31 who helped him escape so now the three of them travel together~

The last pict is me thinking about clones and kingdom hearts :tm: so dramatic about Danny being the soul separated from the main body and 31 a clone made from part of the soul too and all that Not sure where I'm going with that but it do sound cool

And there's also Danielle but I'm not exactly sure.. how she would fit in? but it would be interesting if she was made from Danny's body somehow

so 31 made from part of teh soul and Dani from part of the body sounds poetic somehow

[lord-squiggletits]

I was at a "making friends" kind of social event just this past week and ended up having two subsequent conversations with different people that gave me an interesting reflection on my own reasons for writing without me even intending to make the conversation about it.

First conversation: The person talked about the feeling of awe from being at a music concert and how incredible it is that so many complete strangers can be united by a singular love of music. I related to it with regards to my own writing and how many people have read my stuff. Ended up telling this guy about some of the AO3 comments I've gotten from people to the effect of helping motivate them to live/just reflect on life in general. Somehow went into a tangent about a suicidal friend of mine who died when we were in high school, and me saying that maybe the reason I write so much about the things I do is because of the influence his death had on me. And the other person ended up asking me, 'So do you think it's like every time you write, you're doing it in his memory in a way?'

Subsequent conversation was with someone who was a psychologist for a day job, and I ended up telling them that I was kind of thinking of getting a degree in psychology/therapy one day because writing about mental health issues had gotten me so interested in the world of helping people heal themselves. But then I was also like, "Well, I don't know, it could be that I don't need to become a psychologist to help people with mental health. Maybe helping people by being a writer and telling stories is enough."

It was just a surprising, but topical realization for me to have talking to a bunch of strangers. For someone like me who's often preoccupied with doing and having knowledge and expertise, I often fall into the idea that you need to be directly involved in helping people to really be making a difference. I've literally had thoughts in my mind along the lines of "I'm so smart, hardworking, and dedicated when it comes to writing, but wouldn't it have been so much more of a net gain to the world if I'd decided to be this passionate about something like being a doctor or activist that actually helps people?" It's not like I truly regret being a writer (or ever will, because there's nothing else that I love so much), but in my bad moments I truly do sometimes think "Why does it make a difference if I entertain people or make them feel nicer for a while if it doesn't actually change anything in the world?" To quote one of my favorite Transformers fics of all time, "There was nothing that would have been more worthwhile, but that didn't rule out the possibility that the whole damn universe was wasting its time."

I guess the answer is that making someone feel better, even in a small way, is changing the world, even if it's just a few people, and even if it's just as simple as making someone's day better.

[restinpeacesensei]

in my heart i do want to leave the long post up, bc it represents my memories. it makes me happy to see them together.

at the same time i don't want the pics to be side-by-side to be compared with each other and i know i can't have it both ways... i know how to curate a presentation and i know how art directors, judges/mods etc will look at it. placing a group of pictures together can unify them, but also highlight the differences between them.

i don't think of the later pictures as being "better" and the earlier ones as being "worse", they're all expressions of my heart, in the form that it took. i am aware that the later ones are more complex in composition, setting, color, detail, etc. ...there are things i would do differently about the earlier ones if i were making them now. but they also aren't aiming to accomplish the same things as the later ones. i feel like they express the feeling that i meant to express.

ive always had a variety of styles, which i play fast and loose with bc expressing myself is what's most important to me. sometimes my heart expresses itself one way, sometimes another. the pictures aren't meant to be compared to each other; they're each meant to serve their own purpose within their context.

the overall effect of an image can really differ depending on what i put it next to. i can grab older pictures and put them next to newer ones to give a variety of impressions of the direction my art has gone:

2015 < > 2024

2015 < > 2018 (please don't make comments like "hot", "sexy" etc.--thank you!!)

2015 < > 2023

2015 < > 2025

this fandom was freeing to me bc it felt like i could just make whatever i wanted. i felt like it didn't matter how it came out, i wasn't trying to win any awards, i could just draw and post anything i felt like. this was one of the main reasons i was able to produce so much work back then. it was pure self-expression. because i loved akoya and i couldn't hold it back. it came out, however it came out, and i had to share it.

and i found and felt love through those works. bc however it came out, people recognized and responded to the feelings in them. and im so grateful for that.

the moment i start to feel like people are looking to me to provide "good" content or to compare it and pick what's "better", if i start to feel like people expect me to make more and more finished and polished work or prefer it when i do, it starts to lose its purpose for me. because that was never my reason for making it. it was always a way for me to exist in the world, for my heart to be seen and heard.

i will never make every picture fully rendered, even if it could make me more popular, because some pictures aren't meant to look that way. sometimes they're just meant to exist, in whatever form they take. sometimes they're just meant to look very small like this and that is exactly how they're supposed to be

im grateful to everyone who has loved my akoyas all these years, in all the forms they take. \T/////T/ thank you so much!! \;;~~~;;/

[tyracaterinagrant]

fjgjchv everyone at work had a very confused reaction to me saying i took days off next week but not the beginning of the week but the end of it. bc tomorrow n friday we're closed bc of workers' day so naturally the assumption is "you could have an entire free week if you took the beginning of next week off". sorry idk how to tell you guys i'm taking days off to watch people hit a ball back and forth. and it's very important bc one of those people might be our ginger jesus and princess diana and more important than the president rn. yeah

[vv-ispy]

.

[hythlodaes]

wip whenever

ty @impossible-rat-babies and @coldshrugs for the tags <3 i'm sharing a little snippet from a fic that i've been rotating in my head for like six months :o) not tagging anyone since i'm a little late, but feel free to tag me in your wips, i would love to see them!!

Emile looks over to the sight of Estinien sitting at the window, naked save for the thin blanket wrapped loosely around him. The morning sun coats him in sharp light, striking the gnarled scar of his exposed shoulder and tingeing his sleep ruffled hair in the faintest shades of gold. His brows knit together in thought, eyes distant as he looks out the window, and Emile simply watches him from the bed for a long moment, heart pulling in his chest.

His attention snaps to Emile as he gets up, gaze locked on him as he draws closer. The sun empties his eyes of any color, serving only to highlight the question in them, and Emile doesn't know what to do with all these thoughts that spin uselessly through his head.

Don't get ahead of yourself, is the one he keeps coming back to.

He bends to wrap his arms around Estinien's shoulders, tucking his face into his neck and relaxing when Estinien reaches up to return his embrace. The heat of the day has already begun to settle in, but Emile clings to the solid warmth of his body.

"Please forget what I asked last night," Emile murmurs against his skin. "I know not the answer myself."

[daz4i]

hm. i need to learn something new

[honeydots]

What do you think Siegbert’s relationship with Laslow and Soleil’s relationship with Xander are like particularly as they get older/teenagers.

anon you're enabling me i LOVE their parent/child relationships as they get older!!! read more cause this got looooong

for laslow and siegbert--well first off, i think laslow always can provide a particular brand of emotionally-based support that develops more as siegbert gets older. siegbert has his Anxiety Issues, and where laslow and xander both struggle w sociality as well, i think laslow can relate in a more... empathetic way? dealing with some of the emotional aftermath and letting feelings be feelings (this isn't to say siegbert doesn't go to xander or that xander doesn't help, i just think they're good at different things). on a more lighthearted note, i think laslow's really good at getting a giggle out of siegbert, and good at finding ways to alleviate pressure. he's been doing this for years with xander. and yes, xander and siegbert need different things, but laslow's good at pinpointing those things

something i rly like abt their relationship is that i think that where siegbert more openly shows his idolization of xander (like we see in-game), he still does something really similar with laslow. looking up to him, taking inspiration from him. it just comes out in different ways. for example, siegbert probably trusts laslow's opinions... a lot. considers his sometimes more than his own. and he's just fascinated by the stories he tells. even after laslow's married to xander, i like to think he still travels (and drags xander with him as often as he can--and also drags their kids along as often as he can hahaha), and those stories in particular really entrap siegbert. which is good for a budding prince, i think something laslow (and eventually siegbert and soleil) has that xander lacks is some open mindedness, and not being so narrowly nohr-centric in his perspective--esp in upbringing, if that makes sense. this is also why i like laslow taking xander traveling, cause ultimately i think it would do him good.

ONTO!!! soleil and xander!! ive mentioned before how much i like the grumpy-dad and peppy-daughter dynamic, but. to reiterate: i really really like it gjsjfjsnf soleil, similarly to laslow but probably even more, tends to go to xander and ramble about her girl successes and failures. just barging into his office like i hope you're not busy cause i have things to SAY!! and i don't think xander dismisses her, but he does make her wait sometimes, hahaha. i also think xander will often tell soleil what she needs to hear, rather than what she wants, and ultimately for her that's better than the alternative. he's not entirely harsh (though he can be and that's something to work on), but honest. he also dotes on her more than he should by a xander-standard LOL

i think soleil provides to xander a lot of brightness--it is NOT lost on me that they named her soleil, sun, in a place like nohr. i think surrounding xander with bright people is a fantastic idea. and just like laslow's doing with the traveling thing, soleil probably gets xander to socialize a little more, haha. he isn't a brick wall that can't talk to anybody, but--he does strike me as the kind of guy who has coworkers, but not friends, ya feel me. soleil's confident and full of energy, and tbh i think she's the type to really want attention from her parents, so asking xander to come along with her is a frequent request. and that eventually, naturally, leads to xander getting out more. she doesn't have the same setback as laslow that if he gets shy enough he'll retreat entirely while they're out, hahaha

and one final note to round this off: i like to think!! that xander and soleil are both cat people (xander = cabbit, and soleil has lines about owning kitten posters), where laslow and siegbert are dog people (i have many aus where laslow has a pet dog so this is more of a 'because i said so' kinda thing) (also you might be inclined to think cat for siegbert also but i need you to look inward. deeper. i think he'd like the enthusiasm...!!! i have more i could say but i'll leave it at that)

there you go!! :D

[comradecowplant]

"Steven Universe queer, ketamine queer" instead of inventing new meaningless LGBTQ binaries born from consumerism, unite via your similarities instead-- being imperialist running dogs & not reading enough revolutionary communist literature.

[lunaticamic]

what’s stopping me from doing my thesis on history of religion

[muchmossymess]

PLEASE I WANT TO RETURN

[burningcomputerpersona]

also how is it that spanish love songs has such good merch??? i don't think I've ever been to a show before where I had to struggle so hard to pick just one thing, like in a lot of cases there's only really one thing that appeals to me or I just get something bc i love the band and need to have them on me regardless of what the design looks like. but i was spending ages just staring at the merch stand trying to pick one out of alllll the things i wanted

[moe-broey]

I am...... getting A Little nostalgic for Stardew Valley........ but I know it is SUCH a commitment like if I get back into that shit I'm blacking out for a month. I Cannot Allow It