#this is kinda rambly sorry but this was incredibly common in places i lived when young

[thatdiabolicalfeminist]

A bunch of factors go into it. In my Evangelical Midwestern experience the main two are evangelical Christianity and a desperate desire to get away from your living situation.

You're not supposed to have sex before marriage as a good Christian, but you also probably have limited access to and information about effective forms of pregnancy prevention, and abortion is worse than most things you can do in the eyes of everyone around you and, as a young person raised in this, probably yourself.

(If your partner tricks, coerces, or pressures you into not using protection, you are unlikely to see this as a serious violation—certainly not as serious as abortion would be. You are likely to blame yourself for any form of sexual assault, and in many cases your clergy will agree with you that you were "also" to blame.)

Marriage is positioned as a solution to any of this. Sometimes it's explicitly suggested, sometimes you just know it's the only option.

The people who got married really young (<22) in the parts of the Midwest I lived at that age were usually the ones who knew they probably wouldn't be finishing college in any case, assuming they could even scape together the resources and support to even start. They didn't feel like they had anything to wait for!

(Not to mention if you DO still hope you can finish college, getting married is one of the easiest ways to make your payment plans not be based on a parent's income!)

In that kind of context your economic situation is probably rocky and stressful at BEST, and you have very few options for independence—even get fewer that your family/community won't disapprove of.

But you know what makes you look virtuous, worthy of support, A Real Adult, and lets you live with a romantic partner with the not just tolerance, but celebration of your family and community? A wedding!!

This isn't even touching on the tacit-to-explicit understanding that a lot of Evangelical Christian girls are raised with, that our most meaningful contribution is to pop out babies for God in a marriage where we support and obey our husbands.

(Depending on the flavor you were raised in, there might even still be some disapproval of women who work outside the home, and although allowances are made for necessity it's an obvious, unspoken Truth that the Best Situation is for a woman to find a good man as soon as possible and settle down, and a woman who deliberately chooses to "wait" to establish a "career" might be gossiped about. Something young girls would grow up overhearing.)

Even without that, when you're a member of an economic class that faces awful working conditions for unlivable pay, the idea of having "no job" (other than your beloved and all those babies, something that takes a while to sink in) is very very appealing to many young women.

And many young men do genuinely want to fulfill THEIR role and offer that to them! Of course, it usually ends up not being very practical with today's economics unless they have family to rely on financially.

(I don't know what the rich people are doing but I'm guessing some of the evangelical stuff might still come into play.)

I have a lot of sympathy overall for young people who end up in this situation. There are a lot of different pressures that make it seem like the best option, and maybe in some circumstances (I've known plenty of girls who got married to get away from a horrifically abusive parent) it really is.

But it's generally a terrible experience for both parties and any children they have in that relationship, even if everyone is genuinely trying their best to support each other, and the fact that divorce seems like such an evil sin makes it all worse.

A few couples luck out and figure out a way to move forward with care and respect, or gracefully end the relationship without anyone being seriously harmed, but I haven't seen that much.

Maybe it's better for young people now than it was when I was in this age group 10 years ago. I hope so.

I have a lot of anger for churches and clergy who encourage early marriage and on top of that don't provide the tools to keep those marriages from becoming unhealthy/unhappy/abusive, or to get out if they do.

Evangelical programs to prepare young people for marriage are actually probably more likely to enable and facilitate abuse, especially along gender lines, and abuse has to be life-threateningly physically violent for a lot of Evangelical pastors to give someone their blessing to seek divorce. Even then, a lot of them won't.

But yeah, not everyone will face these exact pressures but these were some common ones in the evangelical Midwest when it was my friends and family getting married young.

Why are so many Americans so obsessed with getting married obscenely young.

[falloutjay]

Wait we can request more than once? Okay then... I wish for Craig x Insecure! Reader (and also kind of x Tweek). So basically we get into a relationship with Craig, at first our personalitiy from very cheery and everything is peachy keen at first.

But then Craig starts ignoring us or shrugging us off, thats when we start being insecure and start thinking dark things like: what did I do wrong? Is there someone else? Am I that annoying?.

So trying to be progressive with her life, we take a job at Tweek coffee, (also sidenote everyone noticed our change in behavior and were worried, but didn't know how to ask how). So Tweek becomes the brave soul to ask us what's wrong. And we spill our problems out to him, Tweek doesn't know what to do but gives us a shoulder to cry on , few weeks roll by, and we find we have alot in common with him, so we start hanging out with him, almost completely forgetting about Craig. (It's up to you if you want Tweek to gain feelings for us)

By this time, Craig has started to notice and gets in the same position as we were (although more jealous than insecure), it isn't until a girl makes a comment about how she'd leave Craig too if he treated her like that, does Craig connect the dots and apologizes, they compromise their relationship and try to be a better couple and be peachy again (or you could do another ending where Tweek goes 'Treat you better' and fights for us).

I'm so so so sorry that I took so long! I just really wanted to take my time on this and really get into it, since I love the request! <3

I'm also sorry that Tweeks route is shorter but hey, at least we can choose which of the two deserves our love. :)

Thank you for being so patient and requesting! <3

_____________________________________

Craig Tucker x Insecure!Reader X Tweek Tweak

The sun on your skin felt wonderful. There is nothing better to do, than to hang out outside on a sunny, warm, and beautiful day in South Park.

To your luck your relatively new boyfriend Craig asked if you wanted to hang out with his friends and him when they would go to Starks Pond. Naturally, you said yes, getting finally a chance to also hang out with his friends.

While the guys were busy playing catch with a ball, you and Bebe, Clyde's on/off Girlfriend sat on the picnic blanket that she bought along.

It was also the first time you hung out with her and honestly, you were happy to basically get to know all these different people.

Bebe was a ray of absolute sunshine, and her boyfriend was the funniest dork you had ever seen.

Token was a more serious guy but oh so nice to you as well. Tweek and Jimmy were nice too and the quieter ones of the bunch.

"So... You and Craig huh?" Bebe asked you and you finally preyed your eyes from the black-haired boy away.

"Yeah. I was surprised when he asked me out." You laughed and Bebe did so too.

"How come?"

"I don't know. Kinda thought maybe I was out of his league. I'm not the most popular person around school and most people don't know me. Unlike you guys. You and Stans Friends are basically famous."

"That's only because of all the weird shit that sometimes happens around here." You nodded.

“So, how is he?” Bebe continued her questioning and you thought about it for a second before answering.

“Honestly, he’s a real sweetheart. Totally not like you would imagine him to be when you don’t know him too well.”

“That sounds so cute.” Bebe said dreamingly.

Your conversation was disrupted by a ball flying towards you. It landed just a few feet away from the blanket you and Bebe were seated on and Craig came sprinting.

He smiled when he picked up the ball and came closer to you.

“Sorry for that. I think Token was distracted by your beauty.” Bebe giggled in the background and you had the widest smile possible on your face.

“No problem. But I think you need to tell Token I’m taken then. By the prettiest boy around the school.” Now Bebe rolled her eyes.

“Ahh, to be in love like that again.” Now Craig couldn’t contain his laughter. He looked over to where Clyde was standing and obviously waiting for him to bring their ball back.

“Go back. They are waiting for you.” You said, pointing over to the boys. Craig nodded, but quickly pressed a kiss onto your lips, before sprinting right back to his friends.

 It was a beautiful day that was always on your mind. Now more than ever. Recently Craig had been rather cold to you and you really had no idea why.

He simply became less and less affectionate, when you would do something together, he barely talked, and he generally seemed changed.

He was angrier, cold, and seemed distant. It hurt you a lot, but talking to him about it was impossible, since he would just not admit that something changed.

It started getting to you. It poisoned your heart and mind that he was behaving in such a way towards you.

Maybe…Maybe he was seeing someone else... But no. Craig wouldn’t do that…Would he? Maybe he just realized you're annoying but didn’t want to break up.

“H-Hey Y/N!” Jimmy called out to you.

You waited for him to walk up to you since you were getting books for the weekend out of your locker. When he was finally next to you, he seemed giddy.

“I was wo-wondering if yo-you’d like to help TimTim and m-m-me with a project?” He asked, a pleasant smile on his face while he waited for your answer.

That smile turned into a frown when you shook your head.

“Sorry, I think I will just stay at home this weekend. I'm not feeling too well…” You lied, hoping Jimmy would not see through your fake smile.

Of course, he saw right through it, but he didn’t know what to do. None of your friends did. They all noticed how different you had become, how you smiled less and less and seemed more in thought.

They weren’t sure what to actually do, or how to help, so they just hope that you would maybe come to them and talk about it.

“Oh o-okay. No problem.” Jimmy said, and you could clearly hear that he was hurt, but he already continued walking.

You starred after him, wishing you weren’t so complicated. You felt like you kept only hurting everyone around you. With a deep sigh, you closed your locker and shouldered your backpack.

“Maybe…Maybe I need to change something…” you mumbled while walking towards the school’s entrance.

Craig had football training anyway, so it’s not like anyone was waiting for you, or that you had any desire to talk to anyone.

Someone hesitantly, you pulled out your phone and went onto Craig's contact.

“Hey, you got time this weekend? <3”

The least you could keep doing is trying you told yourself, even if you felt more and more like an idiot. A few minutes later you got an answer from him.

“Sorry, no time. Maybe next weekend.”

You wondered how many times he had said that by now. It felt like a million times.

Were you really that horrible that he couldn’t stand you anymore?

That it was too much to give you a merciful breakup instead of keep dragging this to the inevitable? And yet you also refused to break up with him.

There still was this small hope that maybe he would come around, see he was being a dick, and change his ways.

You loved him a lot.

And whenever you thought about breaking up, your heart ached. It was a horrible situation for you. And you wished you could escape it.

 “Okay, Y/N. I think that’s all you need to know. If you have any more questions, you can ask our son, Tweek when he will arrive. He got a doctor’s appointment today, otherwise, he will be here before you. He’s weird but nice.”

“Eh…Mister Tweak, I know him, we got to the same school and sometimes meet up.” You said, raising an eyebrow.

Mister Tweak, your new employer, simply smiled. You sometimes weren’t sure if he actually listened.

He was an odd fella, but you were just happy to have a little side job, that gave you okay money and had good hours.

You were looking around the shop in your new Tweeks Bros. apron when the door flung open. Tweek stepped into the shop, rambling about god knows what, and took his backpack off.

He stopped dead in his tracks when he laid eyes on you.

“Y-y-you applied here?” He questioned, seeming genuinely surprised.

You and Tweek didn’t hang out that much. He and Jimmy were little busy bees and therefore weren’t at every hangout, unlike Token, Clyde, and Craig.

“Yeah, I thought I…Might need some change or something like that.”

Richard Tweak clapped his hands and proclaimed: “Good, you two seem to get along. Then I will go home. Have a great first day, Y/N!” Tweek and you watched his father leave.

“So…What happened to the well-known fact that your father is a cheapskate and hires no one to save money?” You asked.

“My mother u-urged him to hire someone so that he can be home more. No idea how she convinced him.” Tweek smiled awkwardly, as so did you.

You never noticed before how little you had talked to the twitchy blonde.

Tweek walked behind the counter where you were and also took his apron.

“My dad already explained the basics?” He questioned to which you nodded. “Good, because honestly, I-I suck at explaining things.”

You loved Tweeks smile, and it involuntarily made you smile too.

“Well, I hope this job will get my mind off things.” You mentioned absentmindedly and the blonde cocked his head to the side.

He would love to ask what going on, but he felt awkward. Like it wasn’t his place to ask. And yet in a short-lived moment of bravery, he asked: “Yo-You’re... alright?” His anxiety shortly piped up, making him scared that maybe you didn't appreciate being asked if you're okay and that he already messed up with you.

You let out a deep sigh, the fake smile appearing once more.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it.”

“I feel like you’re lying about it.” Tweek wanted to slap his hands over his mouth, felt incredibly surprised that it just came out of his mouth and he immediately mumbled a quick sorry.

“It is fine. It’s just… I don’t know if I can tell you. You’re friends with Craig and shit.”

“D-don’t worry about that, honestly. I wouldn’t dare to tell anyone anything that yo-you tell me in private.” Tweek said, stepping closer to you. He pressed his index finger onto his lips, smiling at you.

“Well…Since you're the first guy to ever ask me...I just feel like Craig doesn’t like me anymore. Just…Whenever I ask him if we want to hang out, he tells me off, he doesn’t kiss me or anything, I just… Maybe he has someone else on his mind already.”

Tweek felt overwhelmed by your sudden confession, not having thought you would actually tell him.

“If you want to hear my honest opinion as someone who is close friends with him, there is no one. Craig is not that kind of guy. Maybe there’s a lot going on with him right now and he just can’t tell you. M-maybe give him some space and he'll come around. I know we not really all that close or anything, but if you ever need anyone to talk to, I-I’m here.”

You smiled, feeling actually better, even if you never would have thought talking about it would help.

“Maybe you’re right. And I now have a job, so some time apart might be the right thing.” You shrugged.

You heard the bell above the entrance door ring, signaling a customer arrived.

“Well, let’s see how you do on your first day.” Tweek smiled and gave you a little notepad to go and take the customer’s order.

 Weeks had flown by and you had a wonderful time at Tweeks Bros.

Tweek’s parents were incredibly sweet to you, sometimes making you coffee or giving you a cake or cookie free of charge.

Tweek himself had become a really good friend to you. Outside of work, you now hung out at school, sitting together at lunch, or sometimes even hung out on the weekend.

When Craig and you would meet up on rare occasions you texted with him. Tweek was a wonderful person to talk to.

There even was an incident when Craig asked you to hang out and you declined, stating that you had already promised to Tweek that you two would bake cupcakes that day.

“Wait, so you love Fav/Flavor cupcakes too?” Tweek asked feeling giddy, as you two were out shopping.

“Yes. I never found someone who loves them as much as I do!” You happily proclaimed, feeling amazed at how much you and the blonde had in common.

While nearing the checkout area, Craig spotted you two.

He was out shopping with his family. Somewhat angry, he stomped over.

“So you’re busy today, Y/N?” He said sarcastically and let his eyes wander over you two.

“Yeah, like I said. Me and Tweek are baking today.” He nodded, looking obviously not pleased.

Tweek shifted around uncomfortably, hoping this ordeal would end.

“Well, we gotta get going, those cupcakes aren’t making themselves. I'll bring you one on Monday if you’d like.” You smiled.

Craig only stared coldly at Tweek, who wished the earth would just swallow him whole.

“Okay. Have fun then.” Craig mumbled and walked away fuming.

“C-c-come on, Y/N, let’s get going.” Tweek said, tugging you along to the checkout.

“Bullshit. I’m sure Tweek is hitting on them!” Craig fumed, walking up and down in Tokens living room.

Token, Clyde, and Bebe were all there to see Craig's emotional outburst.

Bebe was leaning on Clyde, reading a magazine while Token and Clyde tried their very best to keep their fuming friend calm.

“Tweek? Tweek Tweak? The shyest, weirdest kid in our goddamn school? Are you on fucking drugs?” Token exclaimed, not believing the bullshit Craig kept on spewing.

“Token is right, Tweek is not that kind of guy. He’s our friend and he’s a pure soul. You’re seeing danger where there is none.” Clyde said and looked at Craig with a worrying expression.

Craig huffed and let himself fall onto the opposing couch to where the others were seated.

Bebe kept chewing her bubblegum.

“What ya mean seeing danger where there is none? There is?” Bebe mentioned now sarcastically and kept reading her magazine, obviously not understanding any of the guys here.

Craig made a questioning sound, hoping Bebe would elaborate. She didn’t seem interested in answering until Clyde asked her politely.

“Oh my god.” She exclaimed annoyed and sat up, closing her magazine.

“Craig, do you honestly think you have been a good boyfriend? Because, frankly, you haven’t been great at all. You always ditched Y/N, kept them at distance, you didn’t give two flying fucks about the relationship and now you’re mad they turned to someone how obviously cares more about them? I would have broken up a long time ago. Consider yourself lucky that they didn’t do so already when Tweek seems like a much better option than you are right now.”

Craig's heart stung, and Clyde looked at his girlfriend in shock.

“Honey, you can’t just say that!” Clyde whispered, but Craig stopped him.

“No, I guess she’s right. I was a dick I think. I need to apologize.” Bebe nodded and so did Token. The black boy looked over to the blonde woman, mouthing a “Thank you” to her, to which she smiled.

 Craig felt like an idiot. A big one. He was now standing here, flowers in his hand, looking through the glass windows of Tweek Bros..

He saw his girlfriend laughing together with his blonde friend and his heart hurt when he saw it.

He loved Y/N. He didn’t want to lose them.

So, with a little confidence, he stepped into the coffee shop and Tweek was the first to spot him, he smiled at him waving.

When he spotted the flowers in Craig's arm and his nervous expression, Tweek could easily guess why he was here. So, he excused himself from Y/N and went to that back of the shop.

Confused, you turned around and seeing your black-haired boyfriend standing there, looking all awkward made you smile involuntarily.

“H-Here. These are for you.” Craig mumbled, passing you the beautiful bouquet of different flowers over the counter. He extended his hand, asking for your, which you gladly gave him.

“Hey, I know I have been a dick recently and I wanted to apologize. I really didn’t see that I had hurt you and there was a lot going on for me, which is why I wanted to stay alone for a while. I now know that that’s stupid. So, I am asking, can you please forgive me?”

You felt dumbfounded. This was everything you wished for, ever since Craig started being so cold and here, he was, flowers and apology were already given and now it was up to you to decide if you two still had a future ahead of you.

You kept opening and closing your mouth, not really knowing what to say at all.

You wanted to get words out so desperately, but you simply could not…

  If you choose Craig:

 Finally taking a deep breath, you smiled and with teary eyes said: “You’re forgiven. Just…don’t ever do that again.”

“Never ever again.” Craig agreed and you quickly walked around the counter to hug him.

While he held you close, he whispered to you.

“I’m sorry that I have been so cold. My grandma died recently, and it affected me more than I thought it would…I just wanted to be alone.”

“It’s okay.” You whispered back, just feeling happy that your beloved boyfriend came around.

“So, to make that lost time up to you…” Craig broke away from your hug and you smiled contently at each other.

“Wanna go out for dinner next weekend?”

“I’d love to, honey.” The bell of the shop rang once more, and some elderly men came in.

“Seems like I gotta go back to work.” You mumbled, watching the men get seated.

“Yeah. So, I’ll be on my way, don’t wanna keep you from work. You look cute in your apron though.” You giggled, biting your lower lip.

“I’ll text you when I’m off work.” He nodded, waved, and went outside.

You stared after him for a moment before you took the new customer's orders.

While preparing the coffee and cake Tweek came back and looked at you with a curious expression.

“He apologized and invited me for dinner next weekend.”

“S-sounds amazing. Does that mean… you will stop working here?” He asked and you immediately shook your head.

“Not at all. I love it here and I love working here with you.”

Tweek smiled widely, happy that his friend would stay with him in the shop.

“I really hope you got some nice clothes for that dinner.” Tweek said while he had a glance at your note block to help you prepare.

“I have something in mind. But maybe you’re interested in coming over and help me pick something fitting? And before that, we will try that new recipe for the raspberry cupcakes and banana bread?”

You asked, sincerely hoping Tweek was onboard.

“Yes, that sounds great.” You were somewhat thankful that Craig had been acting so weirdly.

It allowed you to really get to know the blonde coffee addict that you would now even consider your best friend.

“But n-next time he acts up, offer him some cupcakes with la-laxatives in it.”

The customers were looking over to the two laughing idiots behind the counter.

“Oh my god. Where did you get that idea?”

“Have I ever told you the story of W-WikiLeaks and how Cartman got thrown under a bus by t-teachers?”

“No?”

“You’re in for a treat, trust me.”

The following weekend was wonderful for you.

You had a great afternoon with Tweek, baking and trying on outfits, and your dinner with your boyfriend was amazing too.

You had never seen him so well-kempt and without his signature hat, so it came as a surprise when he stood outside of your door like that.

The dinner itself was a new fond memory of yours. You ordered food and talk for hours on end, catching up on what you two had been missing out on for so long...

  If you choose Tweek:

You didn’t know why your heart arched; you had known it for so long already but just hoped that you didn’t have to do this.

“I-I…” Craig stared at you.

“I am sorry… I just think we should break up…I think I caught feelings for someone else.” You decided to be completely honest and noticed the change in his expression immediately, even if he tried to play it cool.

“I could have guessed that. Tweek is not a bad guy at all… I just want you to know, I am really sorry for how I behaved and maybe we can remain friends?”

“We will see, Craig.” You awkwardly nodded at each other and he left the shop, obviously defeated.

Tweek poked his head out from the backdoor and questioned where your friend went.

“Home, I guess. We broke up.”

Tweek walked towards you and gave you a hug.

“I-I am so sorry to hear, b-but how come. I thought he wanted to apologize?” “I-I-…guess I just don’t feel the same anymore... My time here at the shop and everything made me realize that I can do better…And you proofed me that especially.”

You took his hand in yours, and he jittered and twitched insanely in this for him unusual situation.

You noticed the red blush on his cheeks, and you smiled warmly at him.

“You treated me so much better than he did recently.”

“Well…I-I-…I d-do like you.” Tweek managed to stutter, and you felt your face heat up.

“Hey…Maybe want to hang out next weekend and make dinner together? My parents are out of town.”

Tweek nodded, feeling happy when the bell above the door made you two instantly gain distance.

To Tweek this was new, a close friend of his hinting that they like him and everything.

That was simply too much for him.

The pressure he felt was immense and yet, he felt happy, giddy… In love.

He felt bad for Craig, his friend, and yet happy since you choose to spend time with him.

That slight red blush kept lingering on his cheeks, as he watched you work. With such ease, you managed to make his head spin.

“Just keep doing you. She liked you well enough until now!” He thought to himself to keep calm.

He just had to keep on doing what he did until now and everything would be fine. Basically, a date with the girl he liked the next weekend?

He will try to manage…

[salmonid-ink]

Cities reclaimed by Salmonids--I’m writing a fic so I need to sort this out in my mind. Pardon the ramblings with no visuals; I’m musing here. Sorry if some wording is kinda funky, lol

Cities that were built on Salmonid migration grounds, typically within the last 70 years of their absence, are still considered Salmonid “property” or “territory,” even while not in use. When they return for spawning, the people living there are considered intruders on their sacred land, and are driven out. The Salmonids then claim the buildings as their own. 

Salmonids are known for driving sea creatures off of land for the sake of their migration, as they always return to the same land, however other sea creatures continue to build on this land, thinking that, since it’s not currently in use, it’s fine. They neglect to communicate with Salmonids. All the same, because of how Salmonids react when they return, they are considered ravenous, mindless territorial beasts.

The last time sea creatures were driven out of of “Salmonid land” was ~140 years ago, in what is now considered a restricted ocean zone. Salmonids now build off of this occupied city, upgrading buildings and expanding the threshold of their city limits. The city is massive, housing millions of Salmonids to this day. The surrounding area is considered Salmonid territory as well. The city can be seen from many of the Salmon Run stages, most notably, Lost Outpost (where many fisherman live), Spawning Grounds (just on the outskirts of the city), and the Ruins of Ark Polaris. 

The most recent Salmonid territory that was built upon is where Inkopolis stands now, with the land being “claimed” ~100 years ago, after the Great Turf War. The Inklings, with their weapons that can shoot ink from afar, managed to defend their newly claimed territory during the Salmonid migration, and were able to start building their city proper over the last 70 years.

During the current migration, many Salmonids wanted to try to drive the Inklings out again, however many others were not confident that even their sheer numbers could get rid of the inkfish menace. Even more wanted to find a way to make peace with Inkopolis, however Grizzco shut any opportunity of that right out.

Salmonids are very territorial and defensive, and many of them grew frustrated when they had to reclaim land that was once rightfully theirs, and considered sacred. They are now incredibly defensive of what territories they have remaining, and may seem hostile, even towards those that come in peace.

~ The city proper ~

“The Drowned Streets”

These houses and buildings surround the city, and are in a perpetual state of flooding. Buildings located here have reinforced bases to prevent them from collapsing, and extra measures to keep them protected from water damage. These buildings are some of the safest you’ll find in general, taking on the brunt of storms, and protecting the crops in the “Farmer’s Market.”

The dam that can be seen from the Spawning Grounds regulates water levels, and makes it easier to keep track of water purity.

A large portion of the population lives here, as it’s ideal for laying and raising eggs. The waterways in the streets make for easy travel, and Salmonids can easily keep their gills hydrated.

A popular place to live, but not ideal for many trades, such as farming, artistry, and electrical work. Fisherman love this area the most. It’s also ideal for soldiers protecting their territory. 

“The Farmer’s Market”

While farmland is most frequently found outside of the city, where more land is readily available and there is more space for livestock and crops, the Salmonids cannot resist using what land they have for growing food, even if it’s in the middle of a city. These farms create an “outer ring” around the “High Streets.”

The outermost ring, closest to the Drowned Streets, consist mostly of rice paddies, as well as other water-based crops. The further in one goes into the Farmer’s Market, the dryer the land, so dry crops and roots can be grown closer to the High Streets. There are many fruit trees just on the outskirts of the High Streets, and many affectionally call it the “fairy ring.”

This is where most shops are located, and Salmonids travel to and from the city frequently to trade their wares. The Farmer’s Market is considered the trading heart of the Salmonid territory, and is quite popular as a result, even if a small portion of the population actually lives there. 

Due to land being limited and conserved for crops, mostly only farmers and their families and schools live in the Farmer’s Market. 

“The High Streets”

Located directly in the center of the city. While this sounds like a place where the wealthy live (and in a sense, it is), the High Streets are a place where artisans and electricians craft their best work. This land is in the center of the city, and has (mostly) dry roads. Most Salmonids use vehicles to traverse this area quickly. Due to it being so dry, water is frequently brought to the city’s center to ensure everyone is hydrated. There are many small water towers scattered about the area.

This location has the most important buildings, and thus many Salmonids that rank highly in the army, or have important ties or duties, find it easier to live close to, or within the High Streets. Any living Goldies can be found here, and live in ornate homes.

Most don’t like living here, due to how consistently dry it is, and how many of its residents have a different mentality than the common Salmonid--one could consider it most similar to Inkopolis, but with a rustic, slightly rural air.

However, it’s ideal for electricians to safely build their machines, and for artists to keep their paintings and sculptures dry. There are fewer homes here as a result, but there are many buildings for Salmonids to create and work with their fins.

[motherjoel]

Leading Lady (Spencer Reid x Reader)

chapter two- comfortable silence

wc: 1.6k

summary: you meet the rest of the team and find out how you’ll be protected from the unsub

a/n: please let me know if you guys like it so far! feedback is always appreciated :) 

chapter index: chapter one

-

The ride was pretty silent. You soon realized that you didn’t even know where you were driving to. The guy in the sweater sat next to you in the back seat. You decided to break the silence and turned to him.

“Sooo… what's your name?” you asked him with a smile. You had been introduced to Agent Morgan, the conventionally attractive muscle man, but the blunt pretty boy hadn’t said much.

“Dr. Spencer Reid. Sorry, I should’ve introduced myself sooner,” he acknowledged apologetically. You shrugged, it was no big deal. The way he spoke was not conventionally charming- it was the little details that piqued your interest in him. He wasn’t boisterous or flirtatious, although you wouldn’t have minded if he was.

“Nice to meet you Spencer, I’m Y/N. Though, you probably already know that,” you chuckled, trying to make light of the situation. He didn’t say much, but there was a light smile on his face as he looked out the window.

You offered another question, directed towards agent Morgan. “I’m sorry, but where are we going?” you asked.

“Don’t be sorry. We’re going to the police station to fill you in and introduce you to the team,” he said with a comforting smile. He then took on a more serious tone. “Our number one priority is your safety. We’re going to try to keep you as safe as possible without straying too much from your daily routine,” he explained. You didn't know what that meant, but it comforted you. The SUV pulled up to the police station and the three of you got out and walked inside.

You were greeted by a group of pretty good looking people, not unlike the 2 agents who picked you up. A man with dark features and a stern face introduced himself first as Agent Hotchner, followed by Agents Jareau, Prentiss, Rossi, and Garcia (who was currently on a computer screen talking through a video chat). You shook everyone’s hands and waved to Garcia through the screen, who enthusiastically told you to call her Penelope. You turned back to Agent Hotchner as he began to speak.

“I know this is incredibly stressful, but we appreciate your cooperation,” he said.

“No problem, but what exactly am I cooperating with? Why am I being targeted?” you asked, frantic to know information. Dr. Reid looked up from the files in his hand to answer your question. 

“We believe you to be the next target in a string of local murders. This unsub, or, unidentified subject, is killing women of your age and general appearance who are starring in local theatre productions,” he told you. The information was incredibly jarring, but there was a softness in his eyes that made you feel safe. 

 “While we don’t know why he’s targeting these women, we believe that you are a target,” said Prentiss. Your heart dropped- you’d never get used to being a “target.”

“So, how are we gonna prevent me from dying,” you said in a joking tone. You knew it wasn't a joking matter, but since it was your life on the line, you felt that you reserved the right. Agent Hotchner spoke again.

“We’re going to have one of our agents stay with you at all times. Dr. Reid will be staying in your apartment, posing as a visitor or some sort of outsider, maybe a boyfriend,” he said. As he said this, you couldn’t help but blush at the thought, and when you looked at Spencer it seemed like he felt the same, avoiding your gaze. Agent Hotchner continued. “He is to follow you and stay with you wherever you go. We will also have undercover agents positioned outside of your apartment building at night to keep you safe.”

This was a lot to process. You looked to Dr. Reid, who was already looking at you with… well you weren’t sure. It was like the soft look from before but it contained something extra, maybe pity, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it. 

“Okay, I guess. Thank you,” you said, and you meant it. There wasn’t much left to do at the police station so you were ordered to head back home. Dr. Reid grabbed a duffel bag and met up with you at the entrance.

“Ready to go?” he asked, holding the door open for you.

“Yup,” you said, trying to hide a blush. For some reason the basic act of holding a door open for you made your heart flutter. You hadn’t experienced simple chivalry in months, not even with your ex all that much. You nodded your thanks to him and walked past him to the car, slightly brushing against his arm as you walked past. You hopped into the front seat as he got into the driver's seat and wordlessly started the car. 

The ride over was fairly quiet aside from you occasionally telling him where to turn to get to your apartment. However it wasn’t an uncomfortable silence. Although the two of you didn’t exchange many words, his presence was welcome and comforting. That could also be because he had a gun strapped to his waist and an insane serial killer was after you, but you felt connected to this man already. You had to park a couple blocks away from your apartment because the streets were always packed, but you didn’t mind. He reached into the back seat to grab his duffle bag and the two of you hopped out of the car.

There was something about him that you liked, that was intriguing. You noticed some small mannerisms, like his occasional rambling and the way he talked with his hands. Those hands that made your mind go to... indecent places. You had just met the guy, though, and obviously didn’t plan on acting on the occasional attraction. Shaking these thoughts from your head, you decided to make some conversation while the two of you made your way to your apartment.

“It must be hard,” you said, noticing him giving you a weird look you continued. “I mean, your job. Aside from the physical aspects of catching killers, I bet it takes a toll,” you said before realizing that it could seem insensitive. “I’m sorry, you probably don’t want to delve deep into your psyche with some random stranger you just met…” you trailed off, embarrassed. A laugh came out of nowhere and your eyes shot back up.

“Well, I guess if I do delve deep into my psyche with you, then we won't be strangers anymore,” he smiled. “But, you’re right. It does get hard sometimes, I'm very lucky to have such a great team. We’re all kinda there for each other to help deal with stuff like that. We’re all in the same boat,” he explained. You nodded, processing his response, and it wasn’t long before you reached your front door.

“Here we are, the casa del Y/N,” you said in a terrible accent. You heard a light chuckle behind you as you walked in, dropping your keys on the counter. He stood near the entrance and surveyed your place, not making any definitive movements. He seemed uncomfortable, like he didn’t want to disturb anything, but it wasn’t like you kept your place extremely tidy. It was more organized chaos- with your busy schedule and lack of a social life, you didn’t feel the need to keep everything sparkling.

“Well make yourself at home. Uh, the couch is a pullout bed so you can sleep there. Help yourself to anything in the cabinets, although i'm living basically off of rice and the occasional PB & J so it's not really stocked,” you laughed. He smiled at that, but looked a little concerned. 

“Don’t worry, sometimes I steal the occasional croissant from work so I’m getting my calories. Don’t tell my boss, though” you joked. He laughed again, more comfortably, and walked towards the couch to set down his duffle bag. He seemed to notice your copy of Les Mis, the book version, on the coffee table and he picked it up.

“One of my favorites,” he said, while flipping through.

“Oh, you’ve read it?” you asked, surprised that this calculating man was reading Victor Hugo.

“Yeah, in the original French too,” he said, nonchalantly. You were shocked but you didn't want to make a big deal so you continued.

“Wow. Well, I decided to read it to kinda prepare for the show I'm in. I wanted to get to know the characters more and Hugo can really go on and on so I’m feeling good,” you said. You tried to make time for reading but these days you could only read when it wasn’t busy at work so reading Les Mis seemed like a good option.

He smiled at your response, seeming content that you two had something in common. You felt the same.

“Well, I’ve got the early shift again tomorrow so I’d better get to bed,” you said, feeling the exhaustion from the day hit you. 

“No problem,” he responded, seeming to understand your feelings. “You could probably guess this but I’ll be going to work with you tomorrow. Don’t worry, I'll lay low.”

“Oh, I'm not worried, and don’t feel compelled to lay low. I barely get any company at work so this is exciting for me, besides the serial killer part,” you both laughed. It was nice to have someone who understood what you were going through while simultaneously protecting you. 

With that, you walked into your room to get ready for bed. You barely had time to process your thoughts or feelings before the heaviness in your eyelids overtook you as you drifted off to sleep.

-

taglist: @rexorangecouny

[enragedbees]

@nicerockinkid @nicerockinsideblog @sanderssidesgiftxchange

Happy holidays, Nick!

I had a lot of fun writing this, and I really hope you enjoy it! I hope you don’t mind that I made it just a little bit angsty lol

- love, Anna :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

pairing: intrulogical

warnings: self deprecation, food mention, alcohol mention, brief vomiting mention, mild swearing

recommended listening: yellow - coldplay

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

His chest heaved. His heart hammered. His legs pumped, wheels spinning, pushing faster and faster, trying in vain to catch up with the other bike ahead of him.

      The clouds shifted and the pavement glowed, baking in the hot air, deprived of the temporary relief of cloud cover. Logan squinted. The sun shone in his face. His hands were sweaty against the rubber handlebars.

      Up ahead, he laughed, and the sound blew past with the wind in Logan’s ears. The boy ahead disappeared around a corner.

      Logan turned, his wheels skidding against the shiny black asphalt. He jumped off his bike and threw it in the grass next to the other one, not pausing even a second and running after him.

      His sneakers pounded the asphalt, and then, the pavement. The other slowed to a stop at the crest of the bridge, the occasional car whizzing past on the other side of the concrete barrier, and let Logan catch up.

      He grinned. Two teeth were missing, one in the front and one on the bottom. “I won!”

      Logan pushed his glasses up and tried to catch his breath. “Maybe do it without the head start next time.” His smile was full of metal and rubber bands.

      He punched Logan in the arm, still laughing, and sat down on the hot pavement. Logan sat next to him, their legs draped over the side of the bridge, arms hanging over the lowest rung of the sidewalk guardrail.

      They gravitated towards one another due to sheer convenience. They were in the same grade at school. They lived close enough to walk to the other’s house. They didn’t have a whole lot in common, other than skinned elbows, and grass stains on their jeans, and a desire for companionship. And they both had bikes, and an entire summer to kill.

      The river below sparkled, ripples glimmering in the late afternoon sun. It might have been calmer, but dozens of people were out in speedboats and kayaks and jet skis, making waves and mixing up debris, turning the water to a warm weather greenish-brown.

      A hot breeze blew past, cool against the sweat on Logan’s arms and the back of his neck. Water lapped the riverbank and Logan thought about how nice it would feel to jump in the water. His mom would probably get mad at him for coming home all wet.

      “D’you wanna come over for dinner?” The boy asked. “My brother’s not gonna be home. We can play all his video games.”

      “Sorry, I can’t. It’s my stepdad’s birthday. We could go to the pool tomorrow, though.” Logan kicked the air.

      “I’ll ask my mom.” The boy stood up. He glanced down with a mischievous grin. “Race you to the park!”

      He took off, and Logan was left yelling in indignation and struggling to stand up, almost getting caught in the railing, but laughing as he chased his friend down the sidewalk.

 ~

       “Oh my God, Remus, get down from there!”

      Remus laughed, sitting on the top rung of the railing, overlooking the still, gray river. “Relax, dweeb, I’m not gonna fall!”

      Logan gasped as he started to slip, scrambling for something to grab hold of, eventually latching onto the support rail at his side. He turned back around, face just a little paler, still smiling. “See? I’m fine.”

      Logan breathed through his miniature heart attack. “Would you stop being an idiot? You’re very cool and fearless, now get down.”

      “Alright, alright, but I’m only doing this for your sake,” Remus said, already climbing over the railing, and almost falling again in the process.

      They sat on the concrete barriers on the side of the road, eating out of a brown paper bag of discount candy. Remus said they were “too cool” to sit on the sidewalk anymore.

      Remus was certainly cool, with his detention streak and his popular older brother in the high school and the leather jacket he got for Christmas that he hadn’t taken off in three months. And his perfect, flashing smile, that made every girl in their class ask him for help with homework, and his charming and daring and genuinely funny off-color humor that distracted them from how badly he did with academics. There was no doubt that Remus was cool. Logan wasn’t cool.

      But the view was the same from the concrete, so Logan went along with it.

      Remus rambled on about something, and Logan listened without having to respond. The wind blew, and Logan crossed his arms, wishing he had something warmer than his button down.

      He breathed. It was chilly, but the weather was exactly how Logan liked it. The air was cool and wet, the sky overcast in a sheet of puffy gray, looking as if it could start pouring at any second, but never actually breaking.

      Logan realized it had become quiet. He turned, seeing Remus smirking at him.

      “Sorry, I zoned out. What were you saying?”

      Remus looked toward the river again, still smiling. “Nothing.”

      “No, seriously, I want to hear.”

      “I honestly don’t remember.”

      Logan smiled. “Then what was that look for?”

      Remus shrugged, still smiling out towards the water, arms folded. “I dunno, you were thinking really loud and I wanted to know what about.”

      Logan leaned back. “I’m thinking at least a little about what the hell I’m gonna do for the project in Ambrose’s class.”

      “Oh my God, it was such a dick move to assign that right before the end of the quarter! Is he trying to fail us all?!”

      Remus launched into another tirade, and Logan couldn’t help but laugh. He was happy.

      They’d come out to this spot countless times. It was the only place they were truly safe, the only place they could be themselves together, away from Logan’s too loud, too crowded house that frustrated him to tears, away from Remus’ house that was so quiet and empty, it drove him mad. They were each other’s sanctuary. And other than the infrequent traffic, this place was theirs.

      Remus could have been anywhere he wanted tonight. He could be playing Call of Duty with the other popular boys on the basketball team, or walking around town with any girl he wanted, or possibly even at a high school party with real alcohol, where every upperclassman but his brother loved him.

      But he was here. With Logan. Like he always was. Logan didn’t understand.  

      “I promise you, Lo, one day we’re gonna get out of this small-ass town full of boring-ass people,” said Remus, lost in another in a series of idealistic monologues. “We’ll get jobs, and an apartment somewhere like California or New York, and –”

      “And a cat?”

      “Dozens of them! And maybe some dogs.”

      “Our landlord’s gonna love us.” Logan laughed.

      Remus kept going, painting this incredible future in Logan’s mind, full of a kind of happiness they couldn’t have here.

      And Logan was excited. They knew exactly what the future would look like. They had a plan, and it was airtight. All he had to do was wait to grow up, and they could do it. Logan couldn’t wait.

      But it was still many years away. Right now, they just had to focus on getting through middle school.

      Soon enough, the sky got darker and the candy ran out. The two dug through their pockets and searched the sidewalk and found just enough loose change for a small cheese pizza from the shop down the road. Not ready to go back to either of their homes yet.

      The wind blowing over the water grew bitter as the sun set, and Logan folded his arms, wishing again he’d thought to bring a jacket.

      A weight fell on his shoulders, and Logan looked over at Remus to find him suddenly leather jacket-less.

      “That thing gets way too hot,” he complained. “Hold it for me, will ya?”

      Logan smiled and put his arms through the sleeves, the fleece lining still warm, as the first few raindrops started falling.

 ~

       The rain poured hard.

      Logan sat, drenched and shivering in the dark, teeth chattering and hair plastered to his forehead. His jacket was now soaked through and provided no source of warmth, and his glasses were covered in water. From rain or tears, he couldn’t tell.

      Logan was miserable, but he wouldn’t move. There was nowhere he could go. Maybe he deserved to be miserable.

      It was no secret. Everyone saw the way Remus looked at him. The teasing, the protectiveness, the sacrifices and willingness to drop everything for Logan should have made it so clear. Logan couldn’t believe it had taken him so long to realize.

      But after everything Remus had done for him, Logan did nothing but break his heart, over and over and over again.

      Logan couldn’t see anything but the blurry shine of lights along the bank, and the churning of black water beneath the bridge. It was so dark, and he was so cold.  A tiny voice was nagging at him to get up and leave, that it was dangerous to be out, but he couldn’t bring himself to move.

      He hardly noticed the headlights. The car moved slowly down the bridge, stopping a few feet from where Logan sat.

      The driver’s side door opened, then slammed shut. Logan heard a sigh.

      “What the hell are you doing?”

      Logan couldn’t respond. He couldn’t even look up. If he took one glance at him, Logan would start crying. Then he’d be saddled with trying to cheer Logan up, and Logan was so unworthy of his comfort.

      He stepped closer. “Come on, you’re gonna get sick. You get super bitchy when you’re sick.”

      “I’m sorry,” Logan whispered.

      “Come with me.”

      “I don’t deserve you.”

      “Yeah, we know. You say it like it’s not something we’ve known our whole lives.”

       Logan was definitely crying now. Maybe he had been already. Remus sighed again.

      “Come on, Logan. I’m not leaving without you, and I’m getting all wet now too, so you really kinda owe me this.”

      Logan bit his lip. It took a moment to stand, he couldn’t stop shivering. He finally turned towards Remus, and he could barely see him.

      But when Remus opened up his arms in invitation, Logan fell right into them.

      Remus wrapped his arms around Logan and held him tight. He was so warm, and he was stroking Logan’s hair, and Logan felt so safe. And he felt so guilty, so unworthy to be the one in Remus’ arms. To be the one Remus held this close, or spent all his time with, or dropped everything for when Logan needed him.

      He cried into Remus’ shirt, realizing his glasses were no longer on his face, not realizing Remus had slipped them into his pocket and not much caring. He cried silently in Remus’ car, wrapped up in a dry jacket they found in the backseat, heater blasting and radio playing Coldplay, with no memory of how he ended up there.

      Remus brought Logan back to his house, gave him dry clothes and some tea from a box Logan had left there who knows when. Remus held him on the couch and kept him warm and safe.

      Logan knew he could live a hundred of the best lives and never be good enough Remus. But he let himself be held. Even though he hated himself for it.

      Logan was miserable. But Remus held him, because Remus knew Logan needed him, and Remus took care of him, like he’d done their whole lives.

      And Logan hated himself for it.

 ~

       The weather should not have been this nice.

      The air was lacking in the usual hot, sticky soupiness of this time in the summer. The heat had broken earlier this afternoon, and now, with the sky turning orange and the cool wind blowing over the river, it was perfect.

      Logan was already homesick.

      He walked down the sidewalk, Remus in step next to him. There was no rushing, no clamoring to get there first. No hurry for anything to end before it had to.

      They made their way over to their usual spot, taking a seat on the still-warm cement. The highway behind them bustled with a little more involvement than was common.

      Logan looked over the river, deep blue for the first time in weeks and lazily reflecting the dying sunlight. He smelled herbs and dough from the local pizza shop carried on the wind. He laid his hands against the concrete, fingernails scratching at it absentmindedly.

      He turned. Remus stared out into the water, a soft smile on his lips, only surface-deep. But when Remus looked him in the eyes and that fake smile grew, Logan knew the intention behind it was genuine.

      Logan smiled back but turned away quickly.

      Everything between them was different. There was so much he couldn’t say, so much he wanted to say, so much he knew Remus would have liked to say but wasn’t cruel enough to do so. There was so much keeping them apart, and fighting the growing resistance was getting to be too much for Logan.

      That wasn’t the only reason he was leaving. He was leaving for a lot of reasons.

      It hurt, so much. At the same time that Logan was desperate for distance, craving a change in his relationship with Remus that might solve the distress they were in, the idea of leaving him was so painful that Logan wanted to throw up every time he thought about it.

      What would his life be like if he didn’t see Remus every day? How could he live like that?

      Remus wasn’t going anywhere. Even if he had wanted to, he couldn’t have gone with Logan. It was a very competitive application process. Logan wasn’t sure if even he would be accepted.

      Remus said he didn’t want to. That concept terrified Logan, but he understood it wasn’t for everyone. Remus was a creative; he didn’t need any schooling to do what he wanted.

      The breeze blew through Logan’s hair. All his life, he’d been so excited for the day he would finally escape this town. But now it was really happening. He didn’t know how to feel.

      Logan wanted Remus to come with him. He didn’t want to leave him. He couldn’t leave him. What would he do without Remus?

      Remus probably would have been better off without him. Logan was always holding him back. Logan was so needy and Remus was always the one having to take care of him. He owed it to Remus to leave. He had to release him.

      He didn’t want to leave. No, of course he did. He wanted to leave. He had wanted to leave since he was a kid.

      Logan wanted to stay with Remus. Logan wanted to be with him and be happy with him and make him happier than he’d ever been.

      Logan wanted to kiss him again. He couldn’t. It wasn’t fair.

      Logan wanted to feel Remus’ arms around his waist, pulling him close, sliding his hands under his shirt and over his ribs and the small of his back, and he wanted to run his fingers through Remus’ hair and kiss him until he couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t. Not again. It wouldn’t be fair to Remus.

      Logan wanted to kiss him and pull him close and breathe in the way he smelled and feel the security and comfort of his arms, and only pull away to gasp for breath, and see his tiny, bright, out of breath smile, and look into his eyes and –

      Logan’s stomach turned and his hands clammed up. No, he didn’t want that. Remus was his best friend. He didn’t want anything more.

      It didn’t matter that Remus did. It didn’t matter that Logan once again couldn’t get the thought of kissing him out of his mind.

      He ached. It was too complicated. Nothing could be done now, anyway. They didn’t have enough time. Logan had to leave with the knowledge that this wasn’t resolved, and might never be. That his best friend was gone. Irretrievable, at least not in the same way. It was over.

      “Do you want to go on a drive?”

      Logan looked over. “Where?”

      “Dunno,” Remus shrugged, still looking out over the river. “Does it matter?”

      Logan smiled. “No.”

      Remus turned to him. He flashed a grin. Pulled out his phone. “What time do you have to leave tomorrow?”

      “Six.”

      “We’ve got eleven hours.” Remus slipped his phone back into his pocket and stood up, stretching his arms over his head. He went over to his car, looking back when he got there.

      “You coming?”

       Logan took one last look at the view – the deep navy ripples running over the water, the golden sky starting to fade to a soft indigo, the houses and storefronts, the glowing red target logo high on a hill across the valley, the lights of the fracking plant in the distance. He took notice of every tiny part that made up his town, the town he’d hated growing up in, couldn’t wait to leave, didn’t want to admit he’d miss.

      It wasn’t over. Eleven hours. Not enough time to fix anything. Not enough time to preserve anything. To strengthen anything that would last until he got back.

      Maybe enough time to be happy again. For a little while.

      Logan swallowed down his heartsickness, stood, and walked over to Remus’ car, refusing to look back.

      ~

       He hadn’t really expected anything in particular. But he didn’t expect to be back here.

      Logan couldn’t say he minded. His hometown was beautiful in the autumn.

      Logan stood, forearms resting against the top rung of the railing. The river was jade and peaceful. The shining sky was a ringing crystal blue, the clouds wispy and thinner than stretched cotton. The valley was brightened by red and orange and gold blanketing every tree and the grass underneath, each plant in that halfway state between full and empty branches.

      It had been awhile since Logan came here. It was too painful to come alone, and it was too painful to come here with him. For a long time, it was too painful to be with him at all.

      But then, it wasn’t.

      Logan wasn’t really sure what changed. He did, probably. It was like he woke up one day and realized he didn’t have a clue what he was doing. Everything was wrong. Logan had been wrong. Or he just wasn’t right anymore. He still wasn’t sure.

      But with him, Logan didn’t have to understand. He knew it was right. When Logan finally, finally reached him, it was like he’d found what he had been waiting for his whole life. Everything fell into place.

      For now, at least. Logan knew that euphoria wouldn’t last forever. Soon enough the excitement and perfection would burn down, and they’d get calm and comfortable, and they’d have to work hard to maintain it.

      Logan was ready for that, though. After so long, so many years of pain and wrestling, Logan finally had him. Comparatively, keeping him would be a breeze.

      Logan heard footsteps on the pavement, and turned his head to see him by his side. Logan grinned and his chest warmed. He smiled back, and leaned against the railing, mirroring Logan.

      They stayed there together in silence, the air between them that was once full of unvoiced pain and tension now replaced by a quiet and content understanding. 

      He was still a little hesitant, and Logan couldn’t blame him. He’d had his heart broken enough in the past to warrant the uncertainty and distrust. Logan was doing everything he could to prove that this was real, that he wasn’t going anywhere. And it felt like it was starting to sink in.

      They weren’t in a rush. Logan didn’t know how long it would be before he got to see this view again, if he ever did. He knew he’d miss it, even if he was excited to go.

      Even if he came back, it wouldn’t be the same. Leaving marked a separation in his life; a divide between “before” and “after.” He was looking forward to the after, but that didn’t change his hesitancy to leave behind the before.

      Logan took a deep breath of the air. It smelled like home.

      This was right. He knew that.

      The journey was excruciating. But it got him here, and that was exactly what Logan needed, even if it took as long as it did for him to recognize that. Logan would do it all again if he knew he’d end up so happy.

      He had no idea what the future held. He had no idea how much of the past he wouldn’t be able to overcome.

But standing here for the last time, as Remus reached over and took his hand, Logan was ready to see.

[captainjanegay]

Kasia’s Festival of Fondness - Holiday Edition ♥

It's super late on Christmas Eve (which is the most important day of holiday celebrations in Poland, just a fun fact dnsjjs) or early af on Christmas Day, depends how you look at it dhsjsj and I'm kinda in a food coma and having a beer with my brother. I've been thinking about doing this for a while and there's no time to share some love and affection than the Christmas times. So bear with my sappy self for a while, would ya?

This year sucked a lot. It's been the weirdest time all of us had to go through, it was filled with anxiety and worry and isolation. So now, more than ever, I'm so thankful to have so many incredible people in my life. People I've never actually met in my life but who make me so incredibly happy and brighten up every single one of my days. People who live miles and miles away but are somehow one of the closest ones to me. People whom I love deeply and meeting them was the best thing that happened to me. People who are going to get an incredibly sappy shoutout from me right now and will have to read through all my late-night, slightly-drunk but oh-so-sincere rambling. In no particular order, here we go:

@steverrogers

My sweetest Becky. I will forever cherish the day we first talked because it was a start of something beautiful. I love talking to you, you're such an amazing and interesting person, so smart and beautiful inside and out, so funny and supportive. Not one day passes without you making me smile by whatever lovely thing you say to me, by popping up on my dash or by popping up in my thoughts all of sudden (which happens a lot). You're so caring and sweet and 12 out of 10 times I don't know how to handle your sweetness. I love being able to help you with learning polish (and the fact that you're doing this is just so??? I'm in awe, this language is hell dhsjsj). I could talk to you for for hours or just sit in silence with you for hours and I'll look forward to the day you come to kidnap me :') I love you endlessly 💜✨💚

@hbalbat

I've said that already and I'm gonna say this again and again - you're such a ray of sunshine in the life of every person that has you in their life, Helena. You're so sweet and loving and you care so deeply about all your friends here. It's so amazing to see and being on the receiving end of your love and affection?? It's unreal 💚 I love hearing about your day or about your likes, dislikes or struggles. Even when the world feels overwhelming, you are always able to get up and face it and you're so much stronger than you let yourself believe. You're such a talented, artistic soul and I love you endlessly. You brought a smile to my face so many times and you were able to do this even when I was feeling so low and I'll forever be thankful for your bright and wonderful presence in my life. I love you so much, my sweet pumpkin.

@its-tortle

Luisa, my heart 💚 You are amazing and I'm in awe of you. You're such a beautiful force of energy, love and kindness and I'm always so incredibly happy when this force is directed towards me. You're such an incredible writer and every time you compliment my work I'm like "??? You say this is good but have you actually read your own writing?? How is this possible??". Your comments on my works make me cry real tears. And the card you've sent me? It's so sweet and I'll keep it forever, having something that you've actually held and wrote just for me is so great 💚 You have such a huge and loving heart and being your friend is an incredible privilege that I'll be grateful forever. Thank you for being so supportive and caring, you deserve all the good things in life and I love you to the moon and back 🥺💚

@buckybees

My loveliest Bee, you're so incredibly talented and both your fanarts and fanfics always makes me smile so much? You have the greatest ideas and I'm in awe of how creative and amazing your mind is. You are also so sweet and talking to you is always an absolute pleasure. And the fact that you're part polish makes me so happy? As you've once said, it's like we have this special connection and it's so amazing 💚 You're so nice and supportive and my heart always goes !!!! when you pop up in my notifs :') Having you as a friend makes me so happy and I can't wait for your card (even if it comes in July I'm gonna cry the happiest tears, just thinking that you've sent me one makes me so happy :')) 💚 you make me so happy and I love you loads 💚

@anna-wa

My lovely Anna 💚 I'm so so happy you're still puttin up with me even despite my fandom change and ironically (or not) I think we're now talking more than ever? And it makes me so happy? You're such an amazing person and I love hearing your thoughts and opinions. And you're also so caring and amazing. I've said this a milion times already but the day you've pointed out I probably have ADHD was life-changing and it really helped my mental well-being so much 🥺 You're amazing, talented and the best friend one could dream off. I love you so much and I hope only good things happen to you because you deserve all the happiness and softness the universe has to offer 💚 I love you a whole lot 💚✨

@farfromthstars

My sweet, amazing Pia 💚 you're one of my oldest friends on here and even though we don't talk as much as we used to you're in my thoughts a lot. You've always been nothing but amazing to me and I'll forever be in awe of all the kindness and affection I've gotten from you. I've became obsessed with so many things because (or thanks to, it depends dnsjjs) of you and I love how many of our interests align. I'm so proud of you and you're all of my all-time fave authors, you're so talented :') You're like an older sister I always wanted to have dhsjsj 💚 I love you so much and as messy as the 1d fandom can be, I'll forever be grateful that it brought us together :')

@ziallerslouve

Annika, my sweetheart! 💚 We don't talk as much as we used to but you're still one of my favourite people on here. I love that we can go for months without talking or interacting in any way but then we just go back to where we were and just catch up without any awkwardness (and for my weird af communication skills - or lack of thereof - it's the most comforting thing? 🥺). We have so much in common and I love that you always get me so well 💚 You're so great and it's so amazing to have you as a friend 💚

@mysterious-marvel

Milly, my sweetest! Every time I see you on my dash it puts the biggest smile on my face! You're so talented and sweet and I love and cherish every single interaction we have 💚 You're so supportive and incredible and beautiful inside and out, I'm so happy I've joined the marvel fandom and was able to meet you 💚

@metalbvcky

Mandy, you precious soul! 💚 We didn't talk as much but I love you so much? You're so sweet and kind and you always brighten up my dash. And the fact that you decided to organise a secret Santa event to brighten up this hell of a year is just so amazing! You have a huge and beautiful heart and I adore you so much. Also I'm soooo excited to read "Mercury in Retrograde"?? It sounds so incredible and since you're an amazing writer I know I'll love it :')

@sexiestvampirevictim

Lidia, you're an ethereal creature and I still don't know what have I done for you to bless my life with your presence. I love you so much and your continuing support means everything to me 💚 You're wonderful and amazing and nobody gets my uni struggles as well as you do fjsjsj you always make sure that I won't bury myself in a hole of uni-related self-hatred and I really wish things could be better for you but knowing that I'm not alone is really reassuring :') 💚 you're an unstoppable force and you can conquer the world (and you should tbh, it would be such an incredible place if you did) and I love you as much an many there are stars in the sky

@christmascap

Lauren, my love! I'm still in awe that you're following me, you're like the cool, popular mutual I've had and always admired from afar but then you started talking to me and I'm not sure what to do now? You're so talented and your edits and ficlets are so heartbreakingly good. I can't understand why they don't get more attention because there just so beautiful and everyone should see them. And you're such a warm and kind person, you're always so sweet to your followers and I bet you're so much fun to be around irl :') I know that no matter what obstacles the world throws your way, you're able to overcome them all. I love you loads and while I'm still kinda nervous while talking you (I don't even know why!! You're such a sweetheart! 💚) I wanted you to know that I adore you so much 💚💚

@hufflepufsh

Huffy, my little angel! You're also one of my favourite friends on here and even if were basically in completely different fandoms rn, I'm so thankful that you're in my life! We can go without talking for ages and they we just pop up into each others Inbox and declare our undying love and I think it's beautiful?? You're so amazing and we've known each other for so long and you're like a constant in my life and every time I see you on my dash it makes me so happy, even if I have no idea what you're blogging about dhsjsj I lava you and I'll give you everything 💚💚

@lepetitcomte

.

My most wonderful Mum 💚 I love you and I'd die for you. I suck at maintaining conversations but I think about you a lot. And I mean like a lot. I always send good vibes your way and when you feel a random warmness in your heart it's my vibes finally making it across the ocean. You're so incredibly smart and you've always been so supportive and kind and wonderful to me. Even when we don't talk I'm eternally grateful you're a part of my life. You've gotta piece of my heart and being your daughter is an honour I have no idea how I deserved 💚

.

Also a huge shout-out to @hawkeyeandthewintersoldier @ywecanthavenicethingsanymore @hannah-stagram @ceilingventclintbarton @lifeishell @reedstorm @justice-for-plums @samrhodey for being literal angels and brightening my dash with their presence and brightening my life with every single interaction we've ever had :') 💚💚

I'm probably forgetting so many people and I'm so sorry for that. It's been so long since I've started writing it in my notes and my brain power is getting low fjsjsj I love and cherish every single mutual and every single follower I have no matter if we ever interacted or not. You all make me so happy and you make my days so much more bearable. The unbelievable amount of love and support I've gotten from you warms my heart and it's going to make me burst one day :') thank you for putting up with me through this post and through every single day, I'm in awe you still follow this mess of a blog and continue to give me your affection and love. I love you endlessly 💚💚💚

[falcon-eye]

Another ficlet featuring Cat OCs which will eventually become a part of a bigger story from @inexplicifics Accidental Warlord AU! This one kinda got away from me, Idk. I wanted to include a little more info on my Cats but after a while I felt like I was rambling. I also feel like the tone is kinda all over the place. I like what I wrote, but Idk about how I wrote it, if that makes any sense. And I’m not satisfied with the ending. I also hope the “deal” makes sense too. Idk. I’m just generally sorry for how weird this one turned out. Any questions, even if they’re just about the characters, please shoot them my way! Hope you enjoy!

-

The Law of Surprise had never steered Veko wrong. Well, ok, that wasn’t exactly true. It had never fucked him over, anyway. Well...

Ok, see, many, many years before the White Wolf began his reign, Veko and his twin brother Hamra had been traveling with the Cat School’s caravan. They always had, ever since becoming Witchers, although they sometimes broke off for hunts either alone or with each other. Siblings were rare among Witchers, twins especially, and identical twins even more so. Plus, Hamra was... gentle—for a Witcher anyway. He hardly made eye contact and often didn’t talk until absolutely necessary for days at a time, often using signs when he didn’t want to (or couldn’t) speak. Veko was used to it, often either being able to decipher his brother’s signs and gestures, or filing in the blanks himself. This also meant he was frequently his brother’s “translator” of sorts. Despite mostly taking hunts together though, Veko, like everyone else in the caravan, needed a break from time to time. Especially from his brother’s guilty looks.

It’s common knowledge that Cats are the more... emotional of all Witchers, prone to mood swings, rages, and the occasional bloodlust. It’s just how the mutagens made them, as much a fact as the sky was blue. Didn’t make it any easier on any of them, though. Veko knew this all too well.

Although Hamra was quiet, generally incredibly awkward and painfully shy, he too could and had been taken over by his emotions. And unfortunately, Veko was always in the line of fire—literally. The fight had been... stupid. Probably. Now, years later, neither twin can remember what the it was even about, and none of the other Cats were paying enough attention to care. Hamra was too enraged to remember what happened and Veko. Well, Veko, whether he was trying to calm Hamra down or was truly fighting with him, took an Igni to the face at basically point blank range. Sure, the smell of cooking monster was one Witchers eventually got used to, but as it turns out, the smell of your own brother’s flesh burning from his face and neck snaps you out of a rage pretty well.

Veko was out of commission for quite a while, by Witcher standards. The left side of his face, from under his eye down his neck, and disappearing beneath his armor, was a permanent web of tight, puckered scarring. It wasn’t bad enough to lose his ear or anything, thankfully, and no actual holes in his skin, but it was big and grotesque enough that there was no possible way to hide it unless he covered his entire face. So Hamra had to look at his greatest mistake every time he looked at his brother, and Veko had to deal with the sour smell of guilt pouring off of his brother almost every waking moment.

So, yeah, he needed a break and a solo hunt every once in a while.

This one was about as basic as they get; bunch of drowners terrorizing a local village, no problem. Veko took them out with ease. Or so he thought. Going back to the village to claim his pay, he heard an old man crying for help and realized one of the drowners had broken off from the others. Just great.

The old man and the drowner both were stuck in thick mud, a pathetic sight as the man frantically tried to free himself as the drowner clawed at him. Veko literally walked up next to the creature and decapitating it, yanking the old man out of the mud while still in mid swing.

“Witcher!” the old man cried, his knees nearly buckling once he was on solid ground. “Oh thank you Witcher! How could I ever repay you?!”

Sheathing his swords, Veko chuckled. “I mean, coin never hurts.”

As Veko wiped the mud from his face, revealing his burns, the man paled. “I-I don’t... I-I don’t have any money on me,” he said. “Please, sir, there must be something else I can give you!“

Veko sighed. “Not a problem,” he said. “How about this—first thing you see when you get home, I’ll take that. I’ve got to get my pay from your village anyway. Why don’t I stop by your house in the morning?”

The old man nodded vigorously. “Yes, yes sir Witcher!” he exclaimed. “I live on the edge of town, just a little farm, the one with the blue roof.”

“Blue roof,” Veko said, squinting at the old man. “Yeah, it’s suits you.”

The old man looked confused, but Veko waved him off and walked back to the village with him. Luckily, the alderman didn’t scrimp him over on pay, but it still wasn’t a great amount. However, despite actually being paid the amount he was promised, the local inn just so happened to be completely full. Whatever, you win some, you lose some. Pocketing his coin, Veko led his horse a little ways out of town and reluctantly set up camp.

Veko’s horse was a dun gelding, one of the several Law of Surprise claims and other non-coin payments Veko had made over the years. Once, he’d gotten a literal chicken dinner from a family (which he shared with them, godsdamned his bleeding heart). Another time, an old woman he’d saved from a werewolf offered him and Hamra her home for the night, and taught Veko how to knit when he couldn’t sleep. The horse was relatively new, having picked him up from a farmer with a bad wolf problem, and didn’t give two shits about the Witcher. Which was fine by Veko. He wasn’t close with his horses like some Witchers were. This was his eighth horse, appropriately named Eight.

Eight was a bastard of an animal, constantly biting at Veko’s fingers, clothes, weapons—really anything he could reach. He’d also literally kicked Veko in the ass a few times, and once right in the balls, to the entire caravan’s delight. Eight was also a particular fan of loudly chewing the bark off of whatever tree he was tethered to, which made trying to get peace and quiet a bitch. Not-so-secretly, Veko was hoping whatever the old man saw when he got back to his house was a different horse. It was too expensive to buy another one, and despite the fact that he and Eight hated each other, he’d never wish harm upon the animal. He just wanted to be rid of him, that’s all.

But when he arrived at the old man’s home the next day, horse, chicken dinner, knitting lessons—none of it came even close to what was waiting for him.

A petite woman in a pale blue dress covered in splatters of paint slammed the front door open as he approached. Her hair, brunette, was up in an approximation of a bun, but it was hard to tell as it was so messily put together and curled wildly where it escaped.

Veko saw the exact moment she saw his burn scars, but to his surprise, only faltered for a moment. “Witcher!” she shouted, marching right up to Veko and poking a paint-stained finger to his chest. “You can turn around and leave right now!”

Veko blinked down at her. “Uh, excuse me,” he scoffed, “I came here to get my payment. Who the hell are you?”

“Your bloody payment,” the girl hissed, throwing her arms out. “Surprise!”

“Eloise!” the old man Veko had saved came rushing out of his house, taking the woman’s hands in his. “Please, Eloise—“

“What in the hell is going on here?!” Veko exclaimed, making the old man flinch but the woman—Eloise—stood her ground.

“You asked my father to give you the first thing he saw when he came home, right?” she snapped. “Well I answered the bloody door, Witcher.”

Veko took a step back and raised his hands in surrender. “Ok, ok, so this is just all a misunderstanding, I get it. I’ll just—“

“No, no!” the old man exclaimed as Veko turned back to his horse. “Please, Witcher, it’s the Law of Surprise, it’s destiny!”

“Fuck destiny,” Eloise spat. Veko had to agree. But the old man was frantic now.

“To-to go against destiny—“ he continued, before breaking off into a hacking coughing fit that actually had Veko concerned the man would drop right there.

Eloise calmed her father down and held him until his coughing subsided. “Please, papa, you’re going to overwhelm yourself.”

“Eloise, my darling,” the man choked out, “this is all my fault, but please, you cannot go against the Law of Surprise!”

Veko watched the two for a moment before clearing his throat. “Maybe—maybe we can work something out,” he said. Obviously the man was only getting more and more worked up as the conversation went on.

Eloise glared at Veko for a moment before crossing her arms. “It’s ok, papa,” she said, still glaring, “I’ll talk with the Witcher and sort this whole thing out.”

“Y-yeah,” Veko said. “Um. Do you wanna...?”

Eloise grabbed him—actually grabbed him, the balls on this woman!—by the arm and dragged him behind the house, towards a small stable and paddock where a few goats were housed.

“Alright, Witcher, listen,” Eloise snapped. “I don’t believe in all this ‘destiny’ bollocks. The Law of Surprise is bullshit.”

“Hey, I’m with you there,” Veko said. “I normally get like livestock or food or stuff like that.”

Eloise sighed and bit at her nail, staring out across the paddock. “My father believes in all of it,” she said. “My mother died when I was young. Destiny, papa always said. It’s garbage. But my father... he’s very old. I need to take care of him. Whether I believed in all that shit or not, Witcher, I cannot come with you.”

“And I don’t want you to!” Veko exclaimed. “I can barely take care of my horse properly, let alone a human. You’d get killed or something. Why would I want you to come with me?”

Eloise scoffed. “I can think of one reason,” she said bitterly. Veko rolled his eyes.

“Oh please, I’ve got two hands and enough coin set aside for that.”

Eloise actually cracked a tiny grin. “Regardless,” she said, “my father isn’t going to let this go. And I don’t want this to work him up anymore than it already has. I’m afraid for his health.”

“What do you suggest?” Veko asked.

Eloise thought for a moment. Veko’s scar started to itch. It always did at awkward moments, or at least it seemed to anyway, and this was about the most awkward situation Veko had ever been in. This woman was actually... strangely intimidating! Veko turned away to scratch at his face, which seemed to break Eloise out of her thoughts.

“Do you... want something for that?” she asked. “We have some salves in the house just... in case we...”

“No, no, that’s fine,” Veko said as she trailed off in thought. After another moment, Eloise suddenly clapped her hands together.

“I’ve got it!” she exclaimed. “I know how we can appease my father and still make this work.”

Veko nodded awkwardly. “That’s... good, yeah. Um—“

“This will be your home,” Eloise interrupted.

“I don’t follow.”

“Simple,” Eloise stuck a finger in the air. “You’re a Witcher—you travel. So you must spend a lot of the money you earn at inns and on food and things.”

“Or I just sleep outside,” Veko cut in. Eloise waved him off.

“We could tell my father that the Surprise you’ve claimed is the right to come here and stay whenever you’re in the area. Or rather, the right to my home as your home.”

“How does that factor you into it, though?” Veko asked.

“Technically my father saw the house before he saw me,” Eloise replied. “Plus, we could say that I’m a part of the house, that I keep it for you. Or that the house and I are a package deal.”

Veko crossed his arms. “Do you think he’d buy that?”

Eloise crossed her arms back. “He will if you say it.”

Veko ran a hand through his hair and blew out a puff of air. “This is crazy,” he said.

“You claimed the Law of Surprise, Witcher,” Eloise snapped, “not me.”

Veko started scratching his scar in earnest now. “Ok, but what about the village? What are they going to say about you being ‘claimed’ by a Witcher?”

“Frankly I don’t give a damn what they think.”

“What if you want to get married someday?”

Eloise guffawed. “See, that’s the other thing,” she said. “I don’t want to get married. Ever. Having a Witcher ‘claim’ me as his would get every man in town to leave me well alone. This helps all of us.”

As Veko thought on it, Eloise slapped his hand away from scratching his face again. At his shocked face, she merely glared back.

“You’re something else, you know that?” he said. Eloise grinned.

“Why, because I’m not afraid of you?” She laughed. “You bleed just like the rest of us, Witcher. So what do you say?”

Eloise held out her hand and for a moment, Veko actually hesitated. Not because of the deal itself, but because this woman was truly unafraid of him, of seemingly anything, and it made him feel... vulnerable in a way he wasn’t used to. After a moment, Veko gently took her hand—and wow, she had a hell of a grip for a human woman, too! “Deal,” Veko said.

“Now to tell my father,” Eloise said, already starting to drag the Witcher back around the house.

As it turned out, Eloise’s father was thrilled with the idea. Eloise could stay with her father, destiny would be satisfied or whatever, and Veko would get free food and lodging whenever he was around (which probably wouldn’t be for a very long time anyway). The only problem was that Eloise’s father seemed to take Veko “claiming” his daughter and home as... well... essentially Eloise settling down with the Witcher “to start a family”. Veko was mortified but Eloise just smiled and nodded, going along with what her father said until he looked away and giving Veko a look that meant under no uncertain terms would that ever be happening.

A few details still had to be hashed out, but Veko wanted nothing more than to get as far away from this town as possible. How the hell had a drowner contract produced this much trouble?

Later, Veko reunited with the Cat caravan and Hamra. His brother chuckled softly at whatever look was on Veko’s face, and when Hamra signed asking how his hunt was, Veko groaned.

“Took out some drowners,” he said. “And... and Ham, I think... I think I got fucking married.”

Hamra actually burst out laughing, the first time the smell of surprise and amusement replaced the sour guilt that hung to his brother like a cloud, and Veko couldn’t help but join him.

Fuck the Law of Surprise, Veko thought. Never using that again.

[that-sw-writer]

oooh yas! #16 and 20 for Kylo pwease 😗✌🏻

16: “Are you flirting with me?”  “You finally noticed.”

20: “Shut up and kiss me.”

Word count: 1630

Warnings: Kylo Ren cannot flirt... like, at all.  He’s awkward as shit.

Notes: The song Sugaan Essena comes from the Jedi: Fallen Order video game (the one Cal listens to on Bracca/plays in the Haxion Brood fighting pit).  It kinda slaps so give it a listen if you’re interested.

“Are you flirting with me?”

It had started a few weeks ago, and at first you had thought nothing of it - but now you were convinced that Commander Ren was following you.

Everywhere you went he would conveniently pop up, and you were just a mechanic, what interest could be possibly have in you?

One day you had been under a TIE Fighter, making minor repairs and when someone cleared their throat you pushed yourself out, only to be met with Kylo Ren towering over you.  You had sat up, reaching for a cloth to wipe the grease off your hands.

"Sir?  Did you need something?"  You asked.

You weren't particularly afraid of Ren in the same way a majority of officers were, after all what did you have to be scared of?  You were a mechanic who really had nothing to do with him, therefore he had no reason to take any of his anger out on you.  Or maybe you were just more level headed than a majority of the other officers, you just didn't understand what made him so scary.

"I-Uh... nothing."  He said before turning tail and storming off.

You furrowed your brow, more confused than anything, but you had been quick to shake it off and get back to your work.

Another day he had approached you outside the mess hall, but just as he had opened his mouth to say something to you, he had closed it and kept walking.

These sorts of interactions were becoming strangely common in your everyday routine.  But you weren't necessarily complaining, since Kylo Ren had stopped wearing his mask it had become a lot easier to address him when you could see his face.  He was undeniably handsome, you and your fellow mechanics had had a pool going about his appearance and you were actually glad you had lost - your bet had been that he had a horribly scarred and disfigured face.  But he only had one scar, it split across his face from his forehead to down below his clothing.  Somehow it added to his appearance, you quite liked the rugged look.

Today you were working on Ren's Silencer, although compared to TIE Fighters it was more than a routine fix.  The whole ship was so trashed you were tempted to write it off and send message to High Command that Ren would need a new ship, but you elected against that, after all you loved a challenge.

You had your headphones in, listening to 'Sugaan Essena.'  It was an old song, one popular right at the beginning of the Empire's reign, but it was a great song to work to.  Perhaps your music was a bit too loud, but you hadn't heard someone approaching and presumably trying to get your attention.

When you felt the mechanic's creeper you were lying on be pulled out from under the Silencer you were startled, and managed to hit your head on the way out.

"Ow!"  You complained.

Groaning you pulled out your headphones and were rubbing the spot on your head that was probably going to bruise slightly.

You were met by Kylo Ren's face, looking incredibly guilty and slightly red with embarrassment.

"Yes Sir?"  You grumbled, not overly happy with the abrasive interruption.

"Are you okay?"  He sheepishly asked, and you nodded.

"I've done worse."  You tried to lighten the mood, but his face didn't move an inch.  In fact, he just fell silent.

"You're not wearing regulation uniform."  He pointed out, and you raised an eyebrow, had he really interrupted you for that?  You never wore your uniform properly.

Your regulation jumpsuit was usually tied around your waist, and you just wore a tight, black long sleeved top underneath.  It was more comfortable that way, even though that wasn't strictly how it was supposed to be worn.

"Sorry Commander."  Your tone was rather dry as you began to undo the sleeves which were knotted together around your waist, but he interjected.

"No, I didn't mean-"  He spluttered and you paused to look at him, utterly confused, "I-it looks good, I mean.  You look good."  He commented, before once again turning tail to stomp away.

He didn't even give you a chance to respond, but you definitely put that one up at the top of your list of 'weird interactions with Commander Ren.'  You still couldn't believe that there was a list - you were so oblivious you found yourself constantly wondering what his problem with you was.

A few days went by without any weird interactions, but you did notice Ren lurking in your peripheral vision multiple times.  He never approached, which made it even weirder.

Finally you reached your limit with Commander Ren following you around when you were working on his Silencer for your third shift in a row and somehow every day you seemed to be fixing the cooling system.  You were a good mechanic - no, you were a great mechanic, and there was no way something as simple as the cooling system was continuously breaking on a daily basis.

"Boss, can you get Commander Ren down here?"  You called to your supervisor, who looked at you, confused.

"Are you serious Y/N?  Why would you want him down here?"  He replied to you.

"Because I have a theory that he's purposely sabotaging this kriffing cooling system."  You shrugged.  It made sense after all, he seemed to be the one finding every excuse to be near you.  Now maybe he was trying to keep you working on his ship.

"Are you seriously asking me to summon the Commander Kylo Ren down here so you can accuse him of something?  You must have a death wish."  He laughed dryly, and you rolled your eyes.

"He's really not as terrifying as you make out."  You shrugged.

"Not terrifying?  Y/N I saw him use that glow stick of his to rip apart an entire computer console the other day - gives me the shivers just thinking 'bout it.  But if you want him down here, that's on you."  He snorted, turning away to go and request the Commander's presence.

You shook your head in disbelief at the fear a grown man had for... well, just another man, and rolled yourself back beneath the Silencer to fix this cooling system for what had better be the last time.

A few minutes later someone cleared their throat and you pushed yourself out to be greeted once again by Kylo Ren.  You definitely hadn't expected him to arrive so quickly, although you were just glad this time he hadn't opted to pull you out from underneath the ship himself.

"What seems to be the problem?"  He asked, and you narrowed your eyes at him, suspicious.

"Sir, I think you already know what the problem is."  You challenged him.

"I was told it's the cooling system."  He casually said, and you could tell he was shifting slightly, clearly trying not to run from the conversations like he always did.

"The cooling system which has broken three times."  You weren't afraid of him, honestly he didn't look like he could hurt a fly the way he seemed so awkward around you.  Although really you knew that wasn't true.

"Oh- I-uh, I wonder why that it.  Maybe it needs replacing altogether."  He suggested.

"That would be a long job for something that should be a quick fix."  You pointed out.  You weren't stupid, you knew Kylo Ren knew his way around a ship, he was a skilled pilot, he definitely knew a lot of the mechanics behind it.

"I'm sure you can handle that.  You're a very-" He cleared his throat, "A very skilled mechanic."  His comment confirmed your suspicions, and a smirk began to tug at the corner of your lips.

"Sir, are you flirting with me?" You finally asked the question which had been plaguing your mind.  The following you around, making awkward comments, it all just added up.

A look of relief crossed his face, and his posture relaxed, "you finally noticed." He said.

You wondered what he saw in you, after all you were just a mechanic, not some general or war hero.  Even with your hair swept up into a ponytail and grease marks all over of your face from a day's work he was somehow interested in you.

"I can't say you're a natural, Commander."  You tried to tease him to break the ice, and when he actually smiled at you you realised that he knew you weren't afraid of him.  You were probably the only person on base who didn't live in fear of him, and perhaps that's what he liked.

"I haven't had a lot of practise."  He sheepishly said, and you stood up, as usual using a cloth to wipe off your hands and face.

"I've seen worse."  You reassured him, with a small chuckle.  In truth you hadn't seen much worse, you hadn't actually had many people flirt with you at all actually.  This was the First Order not a cantina bar in the outer rim.

You walked on board the Silencer, away from prying eyes, and he got the hint and followed you.

"I'm sorry if I was too forward, or made you uncomfortable.  I just- I didn't know how to get your attention, and I thought I was being subtle but then there was the time I accidentally hit your head and-"  He was rambling and you cut him off by boldly placing a finger to his lips.

"With all due respect Commander, you could just shut up and kiss me."  You suggested, and this time he didn't hesitate.

His lips met yours in a passionate embrace and you pulled yourself towards him by wrapping your arms around his shoulders.  For all he lacked in flirting skills, he made up for with this kiss.

Turns out his flirting must have somewhat done the trick, because that wasn't the last time Kylo Ren kissed you and it wasn't long before he saw you promoted to Chief Mechanic.

Only the best for the woman he loved.

[jawabear]

(2) Flowers (Javier Pena x Reader)

Not my GIF

A/N: So I didn’t really intend to make a second part to ‘Flowers’ but it had this idea and thought it would write it anyway. I kinda like it? So here’s a second part of some soft and sad Javi because we’ve established that I am incapable or writing anything happy. I do not speak Spanish so the Spanish is did use is from Google translate (which is not always the most reliable source so it may not be accurate) Sorry for any mistakes. Stay safe :)

Genre: Angst, fluff

Warnings: fem!reader, Sad!Javi, Soft!Javi, not really a lot, its a little sad, happy ending though, Pedro Pascal comes with his own warning

Summary: Javi opens up about his love for his friend

Part 1

Javi set the flower down gently onto the grave, smiling softly at the sight. He could practically hear his mother’s soft voice telling him how beautiful the flower was, and how well he had done to keep it alive long enough to bring it back to Texas. “Ahí tienes, mamá” (there you go, mama) he whispered. “Finally, a Miltoniopsis vexillaria orchid for you. I’m sorry it took so long for me to get you one but...” he sat on the soft grass at the foot of her grave, pulling out pieces to fiddle with. He felt incredibly guilty that he had been gone from his mother for so long. “I became...distracted” he admitted. 

“I’m sure you know what happened down there...I should’ve listened to Papa and not have gone down there. I’m sorry. But, I don’t think I’ll be going anywhere for a while now. Although, I might take a trip to the DEA Headquarters at some point, to see a girl. She’s the one who got the flower. You would’ve loved her” he let out a soft laugh “she’s...she’s so beautiful. And she’s funny, and she’s smart, and she’s so kind. She told me it was never too late to live up to the promise I made you about getting one, I guess she was right. She’s always right though. Right about everything she ever said. Apart from me”

“She said I was a good man. But I’m not. You would be disappointed in me if you knew half the stuff I did down there” he sniffed, trying to hold back his tears, but he didn’t really see the point, there was no one there to see him cry, except from his mother, but she was always the one to wipe away his tears, tell him everything would be okay even if she knew it wasn’t “but there, you probably already do. I want to be a good man, for you, for dad...for her. But I don’t even know what makes a good man anymore. Surely, at this point, I’m incapable of being one. Desearía que estuvieras aquí (I wish you were here). To tell me what to do...to tell me where to go from here”

“Sure, I have dad, he’s always giving advice but...I need you mama. I need you to tell me it’s all going to be okay. I just...I...” he pulled his knees against his chest, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand “I just want a hug” he chuckled softly “as stupid as it sounds. I’m fucking done with sleeping with every girl I can find, it got me nowhere. But she...(Y/N)...she hugged me...and she would...tell me it was going to be okay. And when I kissed her...she kissed back and it was like...like it was meant to be. It sounds so childish, like some sort of fairy tale bullshit, but that’s how it felt. It was like, fireworks or something cliché like that”

“But I don’t think I’ll ever see her again. She told me that if I’m ever back in the states to go see her but I don’t think she knew how long it would be until I was. She’s probably forgotten about me, moved on, found someone better. A good man. It’s a good thing if she has, I mean, what could I give her that she can’t find somewhere else? All I’d give her is pain...I’m not cut out for relationships, mama, I never was. Look what happened with Lorraine, everyone was convinced that was going to work, shit, even I was. But it didn’t. Because I got fucking scared. I’m fucking terrified of love. I haven’t...been loved since you died. And...I guess I just hate the thought of loving another woman...scared that...you’ll think I’m replacing you or something”

“God, this all sounds so fucking stupid. Why am I such a coward? You didn’t raise me to be. You and dad raised me to be strong, brave, kind. But I’m not any of that anymore. I’ve fucking failed you. I don’t think Pops understand what I mean when I say that, but I know you would. I feel like I’ve messed up everything. I could...see myself with (Y/N), in a relationship. And, you know what, I didn’t feel scared. She made me feel brave. She made me feel...great, actually. And then she disappeared. And I know that’s not my fault but it sure as hell feels like it is”

He let out a heavy sigh and he stopped his depressive rambling for a moment. He just looked to the grave stone, his eyes scanning over the black letters of her name carved into the grey stone. Javi missed her like crazy. She was the only woman he ever trusted, who he ever loved, and she was taken from him far too soon.

“Lo siento, mama” he whispered to her “I didn’t mean to offload on you like that, but I don’t really have anyone else to talk to. Laredo isn’t much different” he laughed “everything’s still pretty much the same. Which is kind of nice, I guess. I think I’ll stay here. I know this place better then anywhere else, I need that constant in me life right now. Dad has tried to keep your flowers alive for as long as possible. He didn’t do a very good job, but to be fair, it was kind of more a you and me thing. Unless he got some books or asked around, I don’t think he would know how to tend to each flower”

“But now that I’m back, maybe they stand a chance at living for another year. Maybe I should make it bigger. I’ll need something to keep me occupied while I’m here, and I don’t think I can spend my time playing cards with Dad for much longer” he stopped again and took in a steady breath “I wonder if you would be proud of me. Proud of what I have done, proud of what maybe I’m going to do. Or if you would just say you were because I’m your son...”

A gentle breeze blew through his hair making him smile. It felt like she was there.

“I think she would be...” he heard a voice from beside him that made him jump slightly.

“(Y/N)?” He asked in pure confusion when he looked up and saw her standing there with a soft smile, one that he had missed these past years. She had gotten no less beautiful, but he noticed her hair was a little longer than it had been before. It was nice.

“Hey, Javi” she said quietly as she sat beside him at the foot of his mothers grave.

“What are you-how...how did you get here?” He asked “how did you know where to find me?”

“I used my super secret agent abilities” she laughed.

“You checked my profile, didn’t you” he told her.

“Yes. I checked your profile” she confirmed “I stopped by your dads place, hoping you were there, he said that I might find you here. He’s really sweet by the way, something you two have in common”

“Why did you come out here to Laredo?” Perhaps he was just dreaming, there was no way she would traveled out here just to see him.

“Well, I resigned from the DEA. It’s just not for me anymore. And then they told me that you had too, and that you moved back here. You always used to talk about Laredo, how small and quiet it was. I wanted to see it for myself. And I really missed you. I took a chance in coming out here. I didn’t know if you would want to see me again, or even if you remembered me. I guess it is pretty weird me just showing up in your hometown after a few years of not seeing each other. But I really wanted to see you again, Javi”

“I...really missed you too, (Y/N). I’m sorry I didn’t come and see you before-“

“It’s okay, Javi. I can understand why you wouldn’t. You don’t need to apologise” he saw her eyes move to the grave, she noticed the flower, it was still alive “you kept it” she said.

“Yeah, of course. I wasn’t going to not keep it”

“Was it the right one?”

“Yeah, it’s beautiful. Thank you. It...it really made me happy when I saw it on my desk. When did you get it?”

“Pretty much as soon as you left. It was really late but I knew there was one place that may have still been open. That was the last one they had” she said motioning to the flower “I put it on your desk right before I left for the airport”

“Thank you, (Y/N)” she smiled to him. “How long were you standing there?”

“Um...not-not all that long. I heard you apologise to her and then talk about your dad taking care of her flowers. And then you said something about not wanting to play cards with your dad anymore, and that you were going to look after the flowers-“

He didn’t really know what came over him. Perhaps it was longing, or maybe it was fear, or maybe it was love. But something drove him to kiss her. Something inside him made him take her face in his hands and pull her lips against his. He didn’t know what it was, but he wasn’t complaining. It felt great to kiss her again. It felt even better when she kissed back. That fire was burning inside him again, as it had the first time they kissed. He had forgotten how good that fire felt inside him.

She shifted closer to him slightly, her hand resting on his thigh as she pushed against his lips. It wasn’t all that long until they pulled away from each other. Both dragging their teeth over their bottom lips to savour the taste of each other’s kiss. “I love you” she whispered suddenly. There was a pang of fear in his heart at her words but he didn’t know why, he loved her, so he shouldn’t be scared of it.

He felt that gentle breeze again.

It was soothing him. Calming him. Opening his mind, making him realise that he didn’t have anything to be scared of. He wanted this. He wanted her.

“I love you” he whispered to her, stroking his thumbs over her cheeks. “I really love you” She smiled and kissed him again, it was only a short little peck but it made his heart flutter. She turned her head to look at his mothers grave. He rested his head against hers as he grabbed her hand tightly in his.

“Do you think she likes that flower?” (Y/N) asked quietly.

“Yes” he nodded “I’m sure she loves it. She hasn’t told me other wise” (Y/N) giggled lightly at his words, turning her head to kiss him again. They were both addicted to each other, neither one of them now ever wanting to be to far from the other.

“She is proud of you Javi. So is your dad. So am I” he nodded to her, not trusting his words.

“Do you-“ he cleared his throat “do you want me to show you her flowers?”

“I would love that” she nodded. He pulled her to her feet and began to lead her from the grave. He couldn’t help but turn back to look over to the grave.

The wind blew again. It blew through the flower on her grave, almost making it turn to face him. And he smiled brightly, knowing that his mother was proud of him, knowing she was there for him, and knowing that beside him he had someone who loved him. 

Masterlist

22/06/20

[studylustre]

hey bb!! you're kinda a queen on here for giving advice so I hope you don't mind me seeking your advice.... at the moment I've been feeling really lost, I'm way behind on my peers this age in almost every aspect of life,, a reason for this is that my mental health is really bad and I lost my teen years to depression. Therefore now I can't even seem to be making friends or hold a normal conversation with adults due to my social anxiety. I used to be intelligent but I think now I'm just stupid ~~~

~~~ my dad keeps telling me how much I suck compared to everyone else, not every day but often enough that I know I'm definitely not fulfilling his expectations and I feel like I'm never going to be able to catch up on that. I've spent a lot of time on my own, I still do and I don't know how to change that, how to build my own life so I'm not dependent on my parents anymore and can move out after I've finished high school. I just would love to know your opinion on that. Please don't judge me too harshly skskshvff :')) I just would love to know how to build your own life apart from your own family, how one can be able to live with their own thoughts without getting depressed hehe,, idk I guess I carry a lot of guilt with me and I've never been able to overcome it and that's why I'm stuck not being able to move forward. Thank youu if you've read this!! I apologise that this is so unnecessary long, I'd be really grateful for some advice!! I'm a new anon btw,, :) sending u love🥺✨🌈

hi angel!! i don’t mind at all, thank u for stopping by and opening up to me about this bc it’s definitely not easy to talk to people about ur inner thoughts!! there’s quite a lot to discuss here so apologies if my response is all over the place. i first want to address what u said about feeling behind ur peers - i don’t want to dismiss ur concerns bc ur feelings are always valid and this is a v v v common feeling so ur definitely not alone in thinking this, but it’s honestly okay. this is something that took me a while to start internalising (still working on it) but there really are no rules in life!! there’s no set timeframe for you to have to achieve anything by. everyone’s path is different - we all have different dreams and goals and resources and so we all experience things at differently and at different times. life is not a competition and u don’t have to compare urself to ur peers!! also, don’t forget that even the people who u think are thriving and living their best lives have struggles of their own too. like i said, we all have our own journeys. what u see of other people’s is just a highlight reel - u never know what struggles they’re facing behind the scenes bc i can assure u, we all are going through something. none of us are just floating along life absolutely carefree!! there’s obstacles for us all and they manifest in different ways for all of us so do!! not!! compare!! urself!! to!! others!!

secondly, i’m sorry to hear that about ur dad. that’s an awful thing to hear from a parent. i know this doesn’t make up for it but i just wanted to tell u, if u haven’t heard this from anyone else, u are doing great. u may not be where u want to be right now (which is completely ok!! u have SO much time ahead of u to get to where u want to be) but u are trying, u are doing ur best and u are still here which means u are doing great. look at u, here, despite it all!! u have made it all this way and ur going to make so much more progress. i know it’s easier said than done but please try ur best to ignore the naysayers. all that matters is that u are living up to ur own standards - forget what ur dad expects of u, because ur life is ur own to live and u don’t exist to please him. also, i just wanted to reiterate ur point about ur dad having super high expectations and u feeling like u can’t keep up with them. that’s a rough realisation, but i think it’s also a v important one to acknowledge because it’s one that can set u free. if u know his expectations of u are a) unrealistic and b) too harsh, then don’t feel obligated to try and match up to them. in situations such as these, i find it’s often the case that no matter what u do, it will never be enough bc they will always find something to nitpick on. u can achieve incredible things and do everything to perfection and they will still find something to complain about and be disappointed in u for. this may or may not be the case for u, but if it is, i hope u can one day walk away from these expectations and live ur life freely the way u want without feeling like u have to measure up to any outsider’s expectations for u.

thirdly, u are not stupid!! u have so much to offer simply just by being u. i feel like u maybe think ur best days are behind u but that is far from the case. ur best days are still waiting for u!! u have so much to look forward to and so much to experience and to achieve. it’s okay to be confused and lost when trying to figure out this mess we call life. we’re all confused here bb!! none of us know exactly what we’re doing but we’re all faking it til we make it. think about it from the perspective of ur younger self - idk if this is the case for u but when i was young, i thought people who were 18 were Proper Adults. i’m now 22 and i still feel like i’m fumbling my way through life and i definitely don’t feel anything close to being an adult, but hey!! that’s okay. the important thing is that u try. even if u trip up, it doesn’t matter bc failure is inevitable in life and we all go through it. what matters is how u carry urself through these experiences and how u deal with it. it’s okay if u don’t know which direction u want to go in, or if ur not sure it’s the right path for u. just give it a go and try. u can only find out what’s good for u through actually trying. if it doesn’t work out, then whelp, at least now u know for sure that’s something that’s not for u!! onto the next experience. and the next. and the next. until u eventually find something that clicks for u. at that point, u can look back with all ur wisdom from ur experiences and know that every single trial u faced and overcame has made u a stronger, wiser and better person. we love character development!!

u mentioned that u live with a lot of guilt and u haven’t been able to move forward bc of that. would therapy be an option that u would be open to? otherwise, would u be open to trying to face some of that urself through journalling or something like that? i’m far from a qualified mental health professional so i don’t want to give u too much advice in this area bc i’m not qualified to do so, but as an anxious person and chronic overthinker, i really find that journalling helps for me to work through my thoughts. u might not be able to find all ur answers through journalling (i think that’s something that just comes through time and also potentially having a professional to walk u through it so u can untangle everything) but it does help u to get stuff off ur chest and to help u realise what’s bothering u, which is a step in the right direction. also, this may sound weird, but i hear that saying ur thoughts (the ones that cause u to spiral and feel bad/anxious) aloud to urself or to a friend helps a lot!! sometimes u don’t realise how irrational things are in ur head until u say it out loud and really hear it, or have a friend to talk u down from it.

i hope this helps!! i know this is superrrrr long and ramble-y but i hope it gave u some semblance of comfort. know that ur not alone in any of ur struggles and that there are better days waiting ahead for u!!

[garyofrivia]

a few Modern!Gang college AU headcanons!!!!!

not that anyone asked!!! and this has probably been done already!! but i’m bored at work so :/ i’m so sorry 

Arthur:

graphic design major, creative writing minor

took a photography class to impress that cute albert boy from down the hall and worked extra hard all semester just to end up accidentally telling his advisor that he wanted to double minor in photography as well

Tired™

he’s def one of those students that can fall asleep a n y w h e r e on campus

has a sleeve tattoo and is working on a second ;;;)))

he doesn’t party often, but when he does, the entire fire department and 7 cop cars show up by the end of the night to break it up

there was a rumor his sophomore year that he beat up 5 frat dudes at once during rush week for harassing girls and no one has heard of any issues from that frat since

is banned from the local chili’s for dining and dashing

shoplifts chef boyardee, microwavable ramen, and snickers bars from the student center convenience store to Survive

Charles:

environmental studies major

is in 50000000 activist clubs

regularly punches racist white boys w/ maga merch in the dorm common rooms and when the RA saw one time he didn’t do jack shit bc…. he right

he’s never procrastinated an assignment in his life

studies until 5 am every night but? still wakes up at the crack of dawn to go to the gym????

works part time as a barista at a hole in the wall coffee shop/bookstore and is 100% a coffee snob

doesn’t smoke but knows every weed dealer on campus, mostly bc they’re all enviro studies majors

his roommate thinks he’s a myth bc he’s never there or is just super quiet, but rly he just Minds His Damn Business

can be seen reading for leisure on the quad when it’s sunny and warm

Dutch:

political science major, philosophy minor

arthur and hosea are his friends from high school and they’re the only ones that can tolerate his mood when he goes on Insane procrastination benders where he’s trying to write 4 essays in a single night on a fuck ton of adderall and energy drinks

frequently goes on rants while studying in the student center about capitalism and it somehow always results in him on top of a table, yelling about ronald reagan

it gets Annoying when he talks about ancient greece, which is… constantly..

has 4 girlfriends and 3 boyfriends but still has time to participate in debate team every saturday

accidentally incited a student labor strike on campus one time and the cafeteria wasn’t functional for a week

started 6 clubs, but never goes to meetings and can’t remember what literally any of them are for

doesn’t work at all but somehow? always has money??? like he pays for his friends’ dinners all the time?? how??????

Hosea:

graduate economics student

he’s that cool TA in a super hard class that sends the prof’s tests from previous semesters to all the students so they can study for the final

Constantly in the library reading/studying/tutoring

still lives on campus for some reason and pirates textbook pdfs out of his dorm room

has a 4.2 gpa, but acts like he’s never been to a single class in his life

gets high all the time and talks about moving to europe on a whim and is *THIS* close to just fuckign doin it

makes his own kombucha

when he can’t sleep bc of test anxiety he rambles to arthur and dutch until the wee hours of the morn about existentialism and how great the beatles were

is responsible for multiple people discovering they have a daddy kink despite not having one himself

John:

undecided major (communications maybe, but he hasn’t found his “passion” yet)

failed freshman english twice for just not showing up to class

drives one of those old subarus from the 90’s and does donuts in the student lot when it snows

has a CD collection from his Emo™ days in the glove box and pops one in every now and then when he’s alone and feelin’ nostalgic/sad

skateboards to class and usually almost runs over a bunch of people since he always has headphones on

death note is his favorite anime

that One Room on your hall that is ALWAYS playing loud ass music until 3am

is surprisingly really good at math and tries to help tutor his friends but gets frustrated when they don’t understand “basic” calculus on the first try

his favorite hobby is harassing the ducks on campus and has made enemies of multiple geese

Sadie:

criminology major

plays intramural sports, probably volleyball and softball

everyone’s Jock Girlfriend they wished they had but are too afraid to talk to bc she might snap someone’s neck if they look at her wrong

wears leather jackets and aviators for every occasion

one time gave a monologue about sexism in her political theory class after not saying anything for the entire semester and her professor was moved to tears

has a lot of friends but only a few are ride or die babey!!!!!!!! (it’s arthur, charles, and abigail and they bully john together)

knows a lot about cars and ppl pay her to fix theirs since college kids usually can’t afford to go to a garage

speaks german because she got bored one summer and taught herself a fucking language i guess

Sean:

french major (????why is he like that???)

he says he’s studying a different language because the thinks it’ll make him hotter, but really it’s because he fantasises about moving away one day to start a new life

always says how college isn’t really for him and is .2 seconds away from dropping out

hangs out with john a little too much for his own good and once broke his wrist while trying his skateboard

“hey, have you heard of [insert incredibly obscure punk rock band name here]?”

gets blackout drunk every weekend and keeps a journal for the sole purpose of documenting the various places he’s woken up

wears stupid beanies and owns one (1) hoodie that he wears year round

quotes memes out loud to be able to communicate his emotions effectively

a ~Film Hoe~

also………. he vapes

Javier:

international studies major, finance minor

studied abroad in spain and almost didn’t come back bc he loved it so much

plans to get mega rich so he can travel Everywhere

um,,, he loves classic lit and owns an entire library full of it

took a gap year after high school to tour with his band and kinda became a lil famous so that’s cool

runs a thirst trap instagram acct and models part time ;)

every single person that encounters him has been attracted to him in one way or another and they truly don’t even question it

he’s a major mama’s boy and she visits him all the time

he rooms with sean who drives him insane but they have similar music tastes and were able to bond over that

they get rowdy on saturdays but has his (few) friends over on sundays for a “family dinner”

Bill:

computer science major

used to play COD competitively and wants to get into videya game development

seems like kind of an idiot when he asks questions in class but his grades show that he’s smarter than he looks

did ROTC for the tuition money but dropped as soon as he found out that you have to enlist after you graduate lmao

southern angery boi that drives a pickup truck and hosts tailgates every single football game

has a bunch of dudebro friends that he hangs out with due to societal pressure, but all he wants to do is bake some cookies

his roommate was scared of him at first but when he bought him a lil gift for christmas before break, he realized that he was a big ole softie

is late to class bc he spends 65943598 years on his hair in the morning even though it literally never looks different

Lenny:

english major, applying to the education masters degree program

he wants to be a high school english teacher fuck me up!!!!!!

was super homesick when he first moved away :( 

writes his friends papers for them sometimes even though he’s killing himself with his own schoolwork

netflix binges and video game benders are regular weekend activities and he’s been known to not move from his chair for 15 hours at a time

runs an avengers stan blog and cried at comic con when he met robert downey jr

begged the manager at the local comic book store for a job and the guy was just like “yeah, kid literally just apply online idc”

has lots of friends that rope him into doing hooligan shit instead of study

is a giant ball of anxiety for the majority of the semester and is just,, Trying His Best

Micah:

he was the maga kid that charles knocked out the first week of classes

[medea10]

Medea Rambles...It’s Reality

I would really love to put up a review today. Really, I would. And I would love to talk about the latest Pokemon episode, really I would...But, I'm not in the mood. Because of certain events, I'm not in any mood for my usual Sunday shenanigans.

Whenever I pick up my phone and see that damned CNN Alert message, I think one of three things has happened.

1. Trump said or did something incredibly stupid, illegal, or dickheadishly stupid.

2. A celebrity from my childhood died.

3. A massacre has occurred and was caused by gun violence.

And in the past seven days, that third option has come up more often than not. Now, by no means am I fully against guns. It's not my thing, if you like hunting, by all means. If you feel you need it for protection, I don't give a flying fig. However, there are certain guns that really shouldn't be in the hands of anyone. Period! And each time I hear about what a gunman uses, it's usually an AK or an AR-15 or some other monstrosity that really shouldn't be in the hands of (what it seems like) very unstable men. And in a lot of these massacres including the last three prominent tragedies, these very unstable men are under the age of 25.

That is fucking frightening.

Why would anyone want to go to an open place like a school, a Walmart, a gay nightclub, a concert on the Vegas strip, a church, a mosque, a synagogue, a local pub, a college campus, or a garlic festival to shoot up innocent people?

Oh yeah, all of these places have been shot up in the last couple of years. And again I need to say, THREE OF THESE HAPPENED JUST THIS WEEK ALONE!

I remember being in middle school when the Columbine shooting happened and in shock over what I was witnessing. Now it’s by no means the first gun massacre in our country and sure as fuck wasn’t the last. But the mere fact that this was a high school and these were students being slaughtered raised a lot of eyebrows. Now not much action was taken at the time, but there were plenty of back-and-forths over who was to blame for this. Being in middle school, they pretty much blamed all the things I liked including video games, South Park, and Marilyn Manson. Seriously, just because Dylan and Eric listened to Manson, all Manson listeners were going to go on a killing rampage? Fuck you then and fuck you now!

Then I remember 12 years ago with Virginia Tech and freaking out because, hey, I’m a college student. Who’s to say UNM wouldn’t end up on the national news one day because of a tragedy involving gun violence? Then again, I’m just a paranoid, autistic person and I worry over everything.

But then it wouldn’t just be at a school...it would be in places you wouldn’t expect. A strip mall in Arizona. A theater in Aurora, Colorado. And even an elementary school in Connecticut.

Yes, I have to talk about Sandy Hook! Twenty 1st graders and their educators were gunned down. That should have been the final straw in taking some freakin’ action! These were six and seven year olds going to school. AND RIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS FOR CORN SAKE! Because of this, my cousin has a quiet room in his home where his daughter used to play and sleep.

Yeah, not-so fun fact about Medea. I have a relation to one of the victims in Sandy Hook.

So imagine my disgust with pukes like Alex Jones attacking these families, calling them out for faking their children deaths. Alex Jones can just drop from the face of the earth and I’ll sleep like a baby at night. But like with Columbine, not much action was done. Even though President Obama tried, he couldn’t get Congress and Senate to pass any kind of gun regulation laws.

I would like to blame it on the fact that both the house and senate were Republican-led at the time and whatever the black president wanted to happen, they told him to sit and spin because fuck your needs! Yeah, I want to say that they’re all a bunch of racist crackers, but most of them are still kinda lobbyed by the NRA. And when I say kinda, I mean, these guys are willing to lick boots for the NRA and screw the safety of the people.

So, no gun regulations happen and more tragedies continue happening. It wasn’t really until the San Bernadino tragedy that lawmakers wanted to do something. But not about gun regulation! No, because in that particular tragedy, the people causing the mayhem were part of ISIS (or so they claim). If the shooter is someone from a different place other than the U.S., they hate us for our freedom and this is terrorism. But if a white guy from Ohio does it, it’s just a sad day in America.

Now there are many of factors to these killers. Mental health is a big factor played in many of these tragedies. Yes, that is a biggie in general. Because people suffering from mental illness are statistically more likely to be a victim of gun violence than to commit one. People only bring up mental illness if the shooter is a white, American-born boy and soon enough, they’ll drop the subject of helping folks with this problem. How about we talk about gun regulation?! Have weapons of war off the streets and out of our homes! No one needs guns that can turn a body into swiss cheese in a matter of seconds given to a regular joe. Oh and once again, nothing happens. Even after we get some of the worst shootings after Sandy Hook! Because while 20 1st graders being gunned down in a classroom was pretty fucked up, we ended up with more obscene tragedies.

Just to name a few, the Pulse Night Club shooting in Orlando, FL where 49 people lost their lives (during Pride Month no less), an outdoor concert on the Las Vegas strip where 58 people died, and another high school shooting in Parkland, FL where 17 students lost their lives. At least with the last shooting I mentioned, the surviving students had ENOUGH and demanded action. In some ways, change did happen. We have a new generation ask the questions my generation didn’t and the generations before ignored it all.

With the swearing-in of a new Congress in January (the first time it was Democratic majority since 2010), the first issue they took up was on gun regulation. And it passed the house! The only problem is that the leader of the senate has refused to let ANY of these bills pass. He just let’s it die. And then you have that same sonuvabitch send out thoughts and prayers? The Congress is trying to do something so we wouldn’t have to go through these horrible tragedies time and time again! Fuck you Mitch! No seriously, fuck you and shove those thoughts and prayers up your ass because we know what you’re all about! We saw you during the days of Sandy Hook!

And so we continue with this wave of gun tragedies! Only now, a lot of these recent shootings seem to have a certain, controversial thing in common. All of them either liked Donald Trump or praised his rhetoric. I know I shouldn’t tie any tragedy to any serving president. I didn’t blame Clinton for Columbine. I didn’t blame Bush for Virginia Tech. And I never blamed Obama for Aurora, Phoenix, or Sandy Hook. But Donald Trump is a whole ‘nother level of blame.

It’s safe to say we’ve NEVER had a president quite like this. Someone who would rile up his supporters in some frightening ways. I don’t want to repeat ANYTHING of what this fool says. He carefully words his statements to his base and watch these fringey people go off the deep-end. When you have a president blaming Mexicans, banning Muslims, and criticizing African-Americans, there’s a lot of toxicity to absorb. And I am sick of it!

A lot tragedies in the past two years have had the essence of Trump lingering around it. The man who sent bombs to Trump’s enemies last fall was a staunch Trump supporter. The man who shot up a Jewish synagogue last year, also believed in Trump’s words. As did the Parkland shooter! Oh, let’s not forget the man who shot up the mosque in New Zealand earlier this year, he believed in Trump too. And same with the two of the three shootings that has happened in the last 7 days. People trying to enjoy themselves as they eat garlic-flavored foodstuffs in Gilroy and families buying things they need for the upcoming school year in a Walmart in El Paso...all of them taken out by white supremacists guided by words of a lunatic leader who believes black and brown people are the enemy.

His words are not helping. His words are damaging.

I know gun violence has been a major issue way before Donald Trump became president. But this recent onslaught of violence is too much to bear. If he was a decent person, he would put an end to his disturbing rhetoric. No more of these “Go back to where you came from” tweets. That means calling out white supremacy when you see it! And cut the shit about good guys on both sides! When you have one side marching and shouting, “Jews Will Not Replace Us” and the other side finding offense to those words, this shouldn’t be a fucking debate!

This country needs to fucking change and change now. Whether it’s through legislation, replacing political representatives with people willing to give a damn, or overthrowing a dictator. Do it and do it now!

Sorry for this rant, but...I’m just tired of this happening over and over again. I’m almost to the point of being numb by these tragedies. And that shouldn’t happen.

[noxrynne]

I don't really know what it is tbh

Like, the last group of friends I had was back in middle school who I felt close to was probably the last close friends I ever had.

High School I felt too awkward and uncomfortable and scared to get to know anyone. No one really felt safe enough for me to open up to about things, or that I felt like I didn't have enough in common with people. It kinda sucks when everyone around you constantly talks about and has much more vested interest in things that I didn't find really interesting, and the reverse was true: they didn't find what I was interested in all that interesting.

After high school... yeah, I know a lot of people. But that's really it, tbh. I don't feel very close to anyone. I actually feel incredibly artificial to myself and others, I don't really... like, to be honest? I don't know who I really am socially. Any time I meet new people I'm so scared of saying something stupid, saying something wrong, making a bad comment, that it'd start a chain reaction and I'd be ostracized or something. Or mocked, or made fun of. And I get like, between friends teasing is a thing, just sometimes it feels a bit lopsided in about... every case I ever had. Yeah, I forget the names of things so I try and garble up something that might mean *something* yeah I pronounce some stuff wrong here and there, yeah I make mistakes doing things for fun (like, video games). But every time I never really... I mean, it hurts to be teased a lot without really much to counterbalance it. I don't know though, maybe I am an idiot? Maybe my presence is really only tolerated and not really enjoyed? I don't know, but it feels like that a lot. Especially when people all compliment each other, and you kinda hoped to feel included, but instead you mispronounce a name or a word you couldn't quite remember and next thing you know you're kinda being laughed at for it. Again.

And... yeah, I tailor make how I behave pending who I'm around. I know I behave differently with different people, and not just in a "watch what I say" type of way. I'm like... a completely different person in a lot of contexts, I do have a moral and ethical compass I follow and all, but at the end of the day I don't... ever think I've really been a genuine self to anyone. I dunno, maybe it's something I do because I'm scared of rejection. Maybe it's something I do because I don't want to be made fun of all the time and be taken non-seriously all the time. Maybe I miss feeling like I could be good at something, useful even. Frankly, I didn't even realize this was a *thing* some people do until I kinda learned the concept in sociology and realized it's kinda exactly what I do. I mean, it makes me get along with a lot of people? But the cost is kinda... well, they just know a more fraudulent version of myself.

I keep thinking about it lately, how alone I kinda really am. A lot of it is my own fault, I'm... a pretty shitty friend, really. I don't really start conversations because I just feel like no one really wants to hear it, and outside of what I'm currently just... fixated on, I don't really come up with anything to talk about on my own. Even... I mean, and god I kinda hope he doesn't read this because it's going to come out choppy and poorly worded, but... I don't even really feel close to my boyfriend. Not as close as when we were friends. Yeah, we RP practically every night but in a lot of cases I... don't want to anymore. I'd rather just talk, but I don't know what about. I'd rather watch a movie, a show, or just... hang out as... y'know, people. But I feel guilty if I don't RP, and I feel *really* guilty if I don't talk to him even if I'm in a really "I need to be *alone*" mood. Like, kinda regretting, staying up late because I can't sleep type of guilty.

Online I try to make friends, but... I just feel so far removed from everyone. I don't really have interests in common with most of them, and fuck, I'm not doing anything interesting with my life and just about all of them are lmao. If anything I'm just perpetually frustrated at life because I'm fucking terrible at handling pressure properly and (while I get everything in on time, for the most part) I procrastinate so much and the pressure becomes higher until I just start feeling this empty detachment of giving a shit anymore. And I don't like that. I don't really know how to fix it, though, and yeah, that's about school. It feels immature, irresponsible, childish, stupid, but for the life of me I just sit there and stare at my document, my prompt, my papers and just want to cry. I can't think of the next line, the next word, let alone the rest of the thing. I get frustrated, I get upset, I try to do something to drown out that feeling but it doesn't help and I just feel like I'm being irresponsible and I shouldn't be doing anything time consuming/fun for me until I finish my priority.

On top of that, my life experience? It's basically 0. Yeah, I'm fucking stupid. Yeah, I struggle with banks. I struggle with finances. I struggle understanding legal documents. I struggle understanding how to do shit. I struggled, a LOT, with taxes when I had to do them. I struggle driving. I struggle even getting up in the morning. I struggle fulfilling plans. I struggle keeping in contact with people. I struggle opening up, going out, cooking, cleaning properly, my makeup application sucks, remembering my responsibilities, feeling confident and happy and secure in myself. All of my value I derive from myself? Literally just "do I feel like I"m good at this task? Y/N" and that became "Do I feel like I'm good at this game? No? Well then what am I even worth if I can't even have fun correctly?"

I'm fucking 23. I still feel like an overgrown child. I don't like owning up to it because so many people around me are so far ahead. Just about everyone I know currently is independent and on their own, and I'm... still struggling through first year of school. For the sixth time. I'm still struggling with even the idea of living alone, I mean I will be doing that soon? But that's just me staying in the house while my mother works elsewhere. Last time when I went to a dorm? Went to a hotel on my own? I had an entire fucking breakdown. I still feel like shit over that. One time I sobbed, I cried, I couldn't sleep, I felt terrified and scared and alone and hated it. Other time? I just felt overwhelmed, to the point where I just detached. I didn't sleep for a long time, I made a lot of mistakes, I didn't eat, I didn't drink much if anything.

But it's just... I don't know. I kinda feel like shit around most people since they're all having lives, they're all having a lot more fun together and are a lot closer together, and I'm there trying to become friends and failing kinda miserably at it. And it's not just like, one isolated incident, it's all the time. I've kinda always been that more "outlier" person in a friend group that is kinda there but doesn't really feel too close to anyone and isn't really... that close to anyone. And is kinda bagged on a lot.

And I'm frustrated, and upset. Because I literally... I literally don't know how to just... go out and make friends? Even in class there's like, people who talk to me or try to and I"m just... not great at it. I get nervous/anxious so I start blanking and struggling to think of stuff to say, or even just how to respond, I get tense and even... sometimes I can't even vocalize something in a face-to-face environment.

I feel like a massive fucking loser for typing this. For even having this as a problem when so many people around me seem to be able to do this all so easily. And I just kinda... I dunno, feel like crying I guess.

I just wanted a place to ramble about it, so sorry if you had to read it or something.

[solunasimmer]

Clover Loves Colors : Soft Pink.

a year and some change later..

-Spring-

“Hey I’m glad you’re here! You look-you look pretty Clover..It’s kinda weird not seeing you in a leotard-s-sorry, I didn’t mean for that to sound weird.” Clive rambled approaching Clover. His smile was big and he was bubbling. “Oh no, it’s not weird at all, we practically live in those things.” Clover said shyly, chuckling lowly. 

Was she prepared for this? He looked at her like he was so assured. Had he ever done this before?

“Where you wanna go first?” He asked looking around. It was a week day so Cherry Saps street wasn’t very crowded. Clover had drove past this street with her parents, but never actually visited. 

It was beautiful, bright and colorful. Designed with the right amount of complexity. Clover eyeballed the different shops, looking for something to pull her eyes in. She could feel her anxiety creep up, having to make a decision was hard enough being that this was her first date. 

“Uh-hm, H-how about the museum?” Clover asked trying to speak at a normal speaking level. “Yeah! You got it!” Clive beamed, wrapping his arm around Clover shoulders. 

“I really love when they have a random musician out here, just totally allowed to play anything they want. People get really into it.” Clive said pointing with the hand that was wrapped around Clover. He walked slow, so Clover tried to match his place. 

She suddenly felt self conscious. Clive was really close to her face, what if her skin was crappy? Or what if she didn’t smell good? There was so many variations Clover could think that he would perceive her in a bad way being this close. 

Once inside the museum they chatted quietly, Clive usually leading the conversation. The silence made Clover afraid that her stomach would make noise from hunger, so she walked around as much as possible. 

“You’ve never been to the lighthouse? Oh god, you have to go. I mean-you don’t even have to go with me. Just go, its really beautiful. Incredible and kinda sad history but it will take your breath away once you get up there.” Clive breathed, so much intent when he talked. It was infectious and Clover could feel herself soaking it up like a sponge. 

“So you’re into this kind of stuff? That’s pretty cool, I mean, I’m with it.” Clover teased playfully. 

Clive’s face made a ‘oh girl you don’t know’ face. “Common, this stuff is rad-”

“Rad dude.” Clover chuckled. Clive continued, “Yeah you know- I mean, me and my dad, we do this kind of stuff when he’s off from work. I like the sound of his voice when he tells me what’s written on the plaques.”

Clover side eyed him, seeing how bittersweet he looked when he talked about his dad. She got the impression he worked a lot, so their time together was valuable. “That is rad.” Clover said smiling. “Maybe you can read me some, give me your best tour guide voice.” 

Clive’s laugh was warm and husky. He even threw his head back slightly, bringing joy to Clover. “I’m a terrible reader”

“Oh, I love to read-you might think you’re a t-”

Without notice Clive rushed out the door, beckoning Clover to follow. 

“Follow me!”

Clover found him in a little bookstore. Everything about it was cozy and intimate. 

“What’s your poison? We got- cookbooks, mystery, romance maybe?” Clive teased, eyeballing her. 

“I love a bit of everything- I’m into YA..Manga..I love poetry,” Clover slurred her words, having her fingers and eyes trace over each book.

 “I mean who doesn’t love poetry.” Clive quipped, twisting up his face which proved amusing. He quickly picked up a book, and stood very close to Clover. So close it got her attention immediately from the book’s spine she was reading and made her back into a bookcase softly. 

He looked a little nervous, but it was washed over by an intensity and sincerity. He brought the book to his face, cupping it with both hands. Clover looked him over in a mix of confusion and curiosity. 

He spoke softly but raw of emotion- reading the passage carefully. Looking deep into her eyes so see if it’s impact made it to her. 

 “M-My bounty is as boundless as the sea-a,   My love as deep; the more I give to thee,   The more I-I have, for both are infinite.” 

When he was done, he gave a dazzling side smile. Clover exhaled softly, and chuckled almost unable to meet his eyes, until she found herself brave enough to met his glaze.  

“How does one find such cheese at the exact right moment?” Clover teased, eyeballing him in playful suspicion as he walks away to put the book back.

“By knowing exactly where Shakespeare is in the bookstore.” 

- Before - Next - 

Omfgggg this lot is evrrythingg. So in love wit it. Thank youuu! @bottsbotts

[whydontweband]

Sunflower- A Jonah Marais Imagine

*As requested*

Word Count: 3507

Have a lovely day!

In which a shy girl is stood up for a date, and a strange boy with kind eyes sits with her so she doesn’t feel alone

      It happened on my way back from the flower shop. I’d just picked out a bouquet of sunflowers for my mom, she was going to be in the city for the week to visit me and they had always been her favorite. She always said she liked them because they were odd, and the stood out like a sore thumb from the other, seemingly more delicate, flowers. She said she liked then because she felt like they appreciated the affections of flower enthusiasts more than common favorites like roses or lilies. Maybe it was because most people admired them only from a distance, but found them somewhat repulsive up-close. She liked them, because they were an underdog.

    It was around 7pm at the time, Mom and I’s dinner wasn’t scheduled until 8- unnaturally late but that was when she was flying into LAX. I sighed, running a hand through my flat and un-styled hazel brown hair. Normally I wouldn’t be seen in public with bedhead, especially at night, but Mom was the one person I knew I never had to dress up to impress. I smiled softly just thinking about her, how much I missed her, how nice it would be to sit and eat with her, and not feel like the whole world was watching me. It was at this moment, however, that a figure in the window of a small bistro caught my eye. I was walking past the large windows of the restaurant, sunflowers in hand, when I happened to glance in. I hadn’t expected anything of the haphazard glance, but nevertheless- there she sat. In a bustling, elegantly lit bistro filled with smiling couples and classically beautiful flowers, she sat alone- sticking out like a sore thumb. I stopped in my tracks, watching her for a moment in sheer curiosity as to why such a pretty girl would sit alone on a Saturday night. I glanced at her table, but only one side looked lived in- so her significant other couldn’t be in the bathroom. Her plate was clean and untouched, but the breadbasket was empty, and her water glass was no longer full. I realized I’d been standing an unnaturally long time, eyeing a girl I’d never met before, and if she noticed me I think she’d most likely scream, but I couldn’t help it. Walking slowly towards the doors of the restaurant’s entrance, I glanced again. She was fidgeting ever so slightly, picking at her fingernails and smoothing over her red skirt. She bit her lip, and tapped her feet incessantly against the mahogany floors. She was waiting for someone. Without so much as a second thought, I glanced down at my watch. 7:02pm. Mom’s plane wouldn’t be in for an hour, and the airport wasn’t far. Glancing around at the nightlife around me as though looking for confirmation that what I was about to do was, in fact, crazy, I shook my head, entering the restaurant.

“Welcome to Melisse, reservation name, please?” A young woman asked from behind a podium. I smiled nervously, suddenly becoming hyper-aware of what I was doing, and how I looked- dressed in a hoodie and joggers, I wasn’t exactly dressed for the occasion. She eyed me warily after a moment of silence, so I cleared my throat.

“Uhmm..” I stood in silence a moment, watching the poor girl at the table across the room, sitting alone. Smiling charismatically towards the woman in black, menus in hand, I spoke smoothly.

“Actually, ma’am, I’m incredibly late for my date with my girlfriend, the girl right there?” I smiled charmingly as I gestured to the lonely girl in the red skirt. The woman’s eyes widened, clearly not expecting anyone to claim the lone wolf of the bistro that evening. I don’t know why, but I felt a need to defend her, as though everyone in the restaurant was looking down on her. Clearing my throat and leaning forward, I sighed.

“She’ll probably kill me for getting the dates mixed up, she’s already so busy as it is. You know how models can be.” I chuckled, startling the woman even more as she did a double take at the girl, clearly taken aback by words. I smirked slightly to myself as I swiftly grabbed a menu from her hand, nodding in the stil shocked woman’s direction as I made my way towards the table.

“Oh, and would you mind sending over your best sommelier, I have a feeling I’ll have to buy my way out of this one.” I laughed charmingly, internally laughing at how fast the woman’s attitude towards the girl changed, nodding quickly.

“Oh absolutely sir, we’ll have Alicio over right away. And please, send our sincerest apologizes to your girlfriend for the wait. Appetizers are on us.” I smiled, thanking the woman before turning around, rolling my eyes as I walked up towards the girl who was still nervously glancing around. I cleared my throat, suddenly losing any morsel of charm I’d just had as I fiddled with the edge of my sweatshirt.

“Hi, umm,” I turned back to see the woman still smiling fakely in our direction. Turning back towards the mysterious girl, I smiled widely.

“Darling! I exclaimed in excitement, leaning down suddenly and wrapping my arms around her frame. She raised her eyebrow, but was clearly too nervous or taken aback to protest. As I hugged the complete stranger, I sighed, whispering quickly so as to explain.

“I’m really sorry, I kinda told the host I was your date for the evening just give me a minute to explain.” I rushed, quickly releasing my grasp and sitting down across from her. The shocked girl took in my casual appearance, eyes wide as she opened her mouth to say something, most likely call security.

“I’m Jonah.” I spoke hurriedly, extending my hand across the table. Warily, she placed her small palm in mine. Noticing the woman still watching us, I sighed, quickly leaving a small kiss on the outside of her hand.

“What’re you-”

“You look beautiful darling! How was your shoot with Vogue?” I exclaimed loudly, enough for the materialistic host who’d greeted me to smile to herself, turning back to other customers. Once her gaze had left us, I sighed, burying my head in my hands. What was I doing?! I checked my watch. 7:06pm.

“Vogue!? Wh-what are you talking about? Who are you?” The girl whispered, leaning forward as she continued to glance around nervously. I sighed, running a hand through my hair apprehensively.

“I’m sorry, really, I- I don’t really know why I’m doing this, but…I saw you in the window…and I noticed you sitting alone so-”

“So you figured a girl couldn’t be having dinner alone?” She questioned, her eyebrows furrowing together as she folded her arms over her chest. Suddenly, I felt my heart drop just a little, and my hands become clammy. Was she really just having dinner alone? Had I overanalyzed the whole thing? What if I just saw her as this lonely, stood up girl because that’s how I wanted to see her? I stumbled over my words as I began to stand.

“I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to assume that-” the girl sighed softly, laying her head in her chin as she shook her head.

“Fine. I got stood up, ok?” I raised a cautious eyebrow, lowering myself back into the seat across from her.

“I- I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to intrude I just, I thought maybe you could use some company. I’m not some weirdo, or looking for a free meal or anything. I’ll pay for everything, I just- I don’t know. I don’t know why I’m doing any of this actually I just-” The girl listened intently as I rambled, a pink tint washing over her cheeks as she shook her head.

“You felt sorry for me. I get it.” She mumbled shyly. I sighed, shaking my head as I leaned forwards to catch her gaze.

“I didn’t mean it like that. I just, I hate it when places like this treat people differently, or as though they’re lesser, just because they come alone. You know? Like, that woman probably wasn’t giving you the time of day, am I right?” I asked, gently gesturing towards the host who was currently preoccupied with a rather importantly looking businessman. The girl sighed, nodding smally.

“Yeah, I asked for a menu, like, 15 minutes ago…” She murmured. I sighed, shaking my head as I glanced down, realizing I was still holding the menu I’d taken from the hostess. I smiled, handing it to her.

“Here- a menu.” Her eyes lit up a bit at this, before allowing her face to fall.

“Oh, thank you. But, maybe this was my wake-up call that he’s not showing, and trust me- I can’t exactly afford this place.” She chuckled dryly, running a hand through her soft locks of hair, taking her purse and preparing to stand. I took her hand gently, shaking my head.

“No, please. I’m- I’m serious- I’ll pay. I really don’t mind. I have nowhere to be, and I’ve always wanted to try out this restaurant, but no reason to ever come here. It’s always been…a little couply.” She giggled softly, shaking her head as she sat back down.

“That’s…that’s really sweet of you, but I can’t ask a complete stranger to pay for my meal!” I smiled, thinking a moment as I sat the sunflowers on the table beside me.

“How about this, then. We order, I’ll talk a little about myself, you talk a little about yourself, and if by the end of the meal we’re still complete strangers- we can run out of here without paying a penny?” She laughed at this, shyly covering her mouth as I smiled in return. I’d never heard a laugh so beautiful it evoked smiles when it rang in people’s ears.

“Are you sure? Because, that’s incredibly generous of you, I can’t just-” I smiled, nodding persistently.

“I promise. One meal, nice company- no strings attached. You don’t owe me a thing. I just think, people don’t just sit down and get to know each other nearly enough. Everyone’s so mistrusting and superstitious here, it makes me wish people just wanted the best for each other, instead of trying to get something out of each other all the time, you know?” She smiled, staring into my eyes with this expression as though she understood exactly what I was talking about. Nodding softly, she glanced down at the menu.

“Yeah…yeah I know exactly what you mean.” After a moment of comfortable silence, she glanced up from the menu.

“I’m Y/N by the way. And I’ll have the Truffle Risotto.” She smiled softly. I grinned, nodding as I took the menu from her, waving over the waiter.

“We’ll have two Truffle Risottos, and you can go ahead and cancel the wine dude. We won’t be needing him. Actually, what’s your selection of juices? Because my vitamin C level is a little low and I could definitely go for an orange juice.” I smirked mischievously at the confused and appalled server. Y/N giggled under her breath, knowing that this was definitely not the restaurant to be asking for orange juice. When he didn’t answer right away, I leaned in closer.

“I’ll also accept apple juice if you don’t have orange- but I’d very much appreciate the orange. Thank you.” I patted his shoulder before handing him the menu and sending him away, astonished and confused. After he’d left, Y/N broke into fits of laughter, shaking her head as her face turned red, her hair falling in her face as she attempted to brush it away. I smiled, shaking my head as I tossed my napkin into my lap.

“You can’t talk to these people like that! This is Melisse!” She shriekd, still laughing, small snorts echoing as she tried to contain herself. I smirked, shaking my head.

“When we’re paying them, we can ask for whatever we want.” I winked. She blushed, shaking her head as her laughter died down.

“You’re insane.” I smiled.

“Maybe- you don’t know me yet- I definitely could be.” She glanced up at me wide eyed. I chuckled, shaking my head.

“I’m not, I promise. I’m a singer actually.” She raised a cautious eyebrow.

“Oh, so like the other 99% of people in L.A.” I chuckled, not expecting her to crack a remark so soon. She giggled at herself and I nodded, pressing my tongue against the inside of my cheek as I took the blow.

“You’re not wrong.” I chuckled, shaking my head. She smiled, and I noticed she hadn’t fidgeted once since I sat down. Glancing down at my watch again, I took in the time. 7:13pm.

“Well you must be good if you can afford this place.” She quipped, taking a sip from her glass of water. I blushed slightly, feeling a million times less smooth than I did the moment I stepped in the restaurant.

“I guess. My band and I are just lucky I guess.” She glanced up at me over her glass.

“It’s never just luck or connections- I mean, I guess it is some of that too…but you still have to have talent. I think that’s really cool, I could never get on stage and perform.”

“Why not?” I questioned. She blushed nervously, shaking her head as she fiddled with a strand of hair.

“Being in front of people was never my calling. I’m not really a big fan of crowds.” I nodded softly.

“Well it must not bother you too much- you’re in the second largest city in the country.” I remarked playfully. She chuckled as she fiddled with the silver bracelet on her wrist, adjusting her white blouse.

“I usually don’t have to interact with too many people at all- trust me. I’m in school right now at Stanford, but as soon as I graduate I’m moving out east.” She must’ve been incredibly smart.

“Wow, Stanford- that’s a big deal. What’s your major?” I asked casually, trying not to make it entirely obvious that this was the closest thing to a date I’d been on in years- and I didn’t even know her last name.

“Botany.” She replied. I raised an eyebrow, glancing down at the sunflowers sitting beside me. Smiling softly, I shook my head. If only Mom could see me now.

“Botany, wow. So…?” I gestured towards the flowers. She giggled softly, shaking her head.

“Helianthus?” She asked, pointing towards the large, obtuse flowers.

“They’re one of my favorites. Did you know there are actually about 70 species of them?” I smiled, my eyes widening as she said favorites. Shaking my head without enlightening her on the odd serendipity of it all, I shook my head.

“I had no idea.” She smiled, nodding.

“Yeah! And, it’s actually a member of the daisy family! Which shocks a lot of people! And did you know that actually daisies aren’t a single flower at all, but comprised of tons of tiny little flowers! They’re called forets and-” She kept talking, and as I listened I found myself lost in the way her eyes lit up at the topic of conversation, and how passionate she was. A complete stranger and I, sitting together in a restaurant I’d never considered eating at before today-and now, although they had yet to feed us anything- was already my new favorite place.

“That’s amazing.” I murmured softly, unaware of how interested I actually was. It wasn’t so much that the study of plants had ever really caught my eye, but there was something about the way she got so excited that made me excited too.

“Oh, really it’s nothing…it’s probably really boring.” She chuckled self-consciously, taking another sip of her water. My head popped up slightly as I shook my head.

“No, are you kidding!? That’s…that’s fascinating! I didn’t know any of that stuff before.” I exclaimed. She laughed, shaking her head.

“Most people don’t. I think they think botanists are a little crazy.” She blushed, pulling her hair behind her ear. I smiled, leaning closer as I whispered.

“I think it’s crazy to think that standing out a little is a bad thing.” She beamed at this, nodding.

“Maybe you’re right.”

We talked the rest of the hour, about things I didn’t even realize I’d always wanted to talk about. Things I hadn’t even realized I’d had opinions on, that suddenly seemed so important in her presence. The food was amazing, though the portions were laughable, and somehow she made it feel like we’d come here together, rather than the reality of me bursting in on her evening. It wasn’t until my phone buzzed in my pocket that I was launched out of this fantasy of an evening, into the reality of my life.

“Um, excuse me a minute, I think I got a text.” I smiled apologetically. She nodded, smiling softly as she took the final bite of her overpriced rice. It was from Mom.

Mom: The plane just landed! Stopping at the bathroom and the baggage check, should I catch a cab to your house or are you picking me up. Can’t wait to see my baby! Love you! – Mama

I ran a hand through my hair as I sighed, shaking my head. The airport wasn’t far, but I’d hate for her to take a cab all the way to the house. I should be there for her, after all the time and effort she put into coming out here to see me. Sighing, I shook my head, standing. Y/N glanced up at me.

“Is everything ok, Jonah?” I smiled, nodding.

“Yeah, everything’s fine. My mom just texted.”

“Oh, is she at the airport?” Y/N asked concernedly. I’d forgotten I’d mentioned my mom earlier during dinner, and I nodded.

“Yeah, she just landed. I hate to end this, but-” “No no no no no! Don’t worry about it at all! You have to pick her up!” I smiled, blushing slightly at the littlest things she did, and thinking about how different the evening, and maybe the rest of my life, would have gone if I hadn’t stopped in and sat down next to her.

“Are you sure?” Y/N grinned, nodding as she waved the server over.

“Of course! Here, we’ll get the check and-” I smirked, handing the server my credit card before she had the chance take out her wallet.

“Don’t even think about it.” I teased. She sighed, shaking her head in defeat.

“I could’ve helped, you know. After all, you basically rescued my whole evening.” I chuckled, shaking my head.

“It was an honor to be your knight in shining armor, Sunflower girl.” I teased, a smirk playing my lips as she blushed, shaking her head. As the server came back with my card, I tucked it into my wallet, handing her a single sunflower from the bouquet I’d purchased before dinner.

“Jonah, I can’t, they’re for your Mother!”

“She won’t miss one if it went to a good cause.” I smiled. Pushing my chair in to leave.

“Can I walk you to your car?” I offered, suddenly realizing that I had absolutely no idea as to how I could ever see her again. She smiled, standing herself as she slid her purse over her shoulder, walking side by side as we exited the restaurant, city lights now lining the streets.

“I’m parked a few minutes away in the wrong direction, you go on ahead to the airport, I don’t want you to be any later than you already are.” I nodded, smiling as I headed towards the nearest taxi, glancing back towards the girl in the red skirt whom I’d somehow managed to fall for over good conversation and a completely random series of events.

“Is this just me, or would you maybe wanna see me again?” I called out from a little way down the sidewalk. She blushed, her cheeks turning the shade of her skirt for what was not the first time this evening as she nodded softly.

“I’d like that too.”

“How do I get ahold of you?” I called out. She smiled, walking backwards in the opposite direction as she made her way towards the parking garage.

“Melisse, 7 o’ clock next Saturday night work for you?” I chuckled, shaking my head at how smooth that line had come across.

“It’s a date…sunflower girl.” She smiled, clutching the sunflower I’d given her closer to her chest as she turned, disappearing behind the corner of a tall building- leaving me completely and utterly at a loss for words. As I climbed into the nearest taxi, making my way downtown towards the airport, I didn’t think I could recognize the person I was, just moments before I glanced haphazardly into the window of that restaurant. Somehow, I didn’t think I’d ever be that person again- and as I glanced down at my now 11 sunflowers, nothing made me happier.

A/N: Guess who was feeling way too cheesy while writing this piece of fluff on her lane <3333 love you all. -Anna

[23-plants]

Girl on My Mind

Chapter 2

warnings: cursing (i think I honestly don’t remember) 

<<two>>

Aizawa dismissed the class for the day, sending their shocked bodies shuffling back to the dorms in silence.

Kaminari finally spoke up. “That was insane.”

“Yeah. I mean how could she do that?” The rest of the class mumbled in agreement with Mina.

“It was kinda scary,” Sue croaked. “Did Bakugo stand any chance? She’ll be top of the class in no time.”

The class, minus Bakugo and Miyako, filed into the dorm building and back to their rooms, with Midoriya, Iida, and Uraraka staying behind in the common area.

“Wow. That was…”

“Crazy! I mean how did she do that? I’ve never seen anyone that strong, especially at our age, I mean you, and Bakugo and todoroki are the tops of our class and she crushed Bakugo without a second thought, I mean it was ruthless! What do you think, Deku?”

“Well… I’m not sure what to think Uraraka, I mean her physical appearance is deceiving, a strong tactic for a competitor, and her strength is off the charts, what I don’t know yet is is her quirk an earth quirk and that’s why she could grab those pieces of rock, or if it’s some sort of telekinesis…” His voice disintegrated into mutters to himself, trying to decipher this brand new quirk.

“Midoriya, you’re doing it again,” Iida reminded him.

“Oh! Oops, sorry about that guys.” A blush flooded Deku’s face, and he spoke his thoughts to his friends.

In the middle of their conversation, the huge door to the dorm creaked open and a tiny face popped through, looking both ways, before lugging her bag through the door.

“OH! Hi! You must be Nakajima Miyako! Hello, my name’s Ochaco Uraraka, but you can call me Uraraka. Welcome to our class, everyone’s really excited to meet you. This is Deku and Iida.”

“Hello Miss Miyako!” “Hey” The boys waved at Miyako, and a sheepish blush seeped further across Izuku’s face. I can’t believe we were talking about her and she just walked in, how embarrassing.

“Hi Deku, Hi Iida. And don’t worry about it, I guess I didn’t make a very good first impression at the PE fields.” She reached her hand around to the back of her neck and rubbed it, smiling embarrassedly at the ground. Wait. Midoriya thought. I didn’t say that out loud, did I? Miyako looked up wide-eyed at Midoriya. “Oh shit I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to do that, the voices are just so loud sometimes, and my mom and I don’t really talk out loud at home, and I just tend to slip into it,” she continued to ramble, Midoriya still standing there shocked, and trying to comprehend what just happened. “Wait so did you just read my mind?” “Umm, yeah.” Deku’s eyes flew out of his head, and his mouth started moving at the speed of light, asking her questions about her quirk. Iida and Uraraka painstakingly pulled him off, banishing him to go clean the dishes from that morning’s breakfast. “Let’s get you settled in and then you can meet everyone!” “Uh, thanks.” __________

“I, uh, think I’m on level 4? Here’s the chart Aizawa gave me.” Miyako handed Uraraka her chart, and Uraraka’s eyes lit up “YAY! WE’RE ON THE SAME FLOOR! Mina is on our floor too, she’s super nice and always knows everything that’s going on with the rest of the class. And… it looks like you’re in the dorm next to Bakugo.”

“Well this should be interesting to say the least.” Miyako grimaced.

“Where’s your stuff, I can help you carry everything upstairs!”

“Right here, I just have a backpack and this, they delivered everything else to my room, or at least that’s what Aizawa told me.”

“IS THAT A CAT??!?!?!?”

“Yeah,” Miyako smiled, sticking her fingers through the holes of the carrier. “Since my mom is away on hero work, and there’s no one to talk care of him, they made an exception for me to bring him here.” “Awww that’s so sweet, what’s his name?”

“Prism.”

“Everyone has to meet him, I’m absolutely in love.”

“For sure!”

__________

Later that night after dinner…

Miyako sat on an ottoman in front of the television, facing her new classmates, who were all piled onto the couches in front of her. Crickets chirping echoed in the common space, a deafening silence washed across the room.

“Since when did we have crickets?” Mina exclaimed, crushing the silence and causing the rest of the class to fly into a tizzy of questions for the new girl.

“Who Are You??!” “How do you lift rocks?” “Where did you come from?!?” “Can you read minds or something?” “What is your quirk!??” “How did you do that to Bakugo??!” “Who exactly is your mom and how does Eraser know her?”

“Uhhh guys I can’t hear anything… Ow… So loud…” Miyako crumbled into her seat, what felt like hundreds of ear splitting voices pounding a hole through her head.

“EVERYONE STOP” Uraraka shouted. 19 pairs of eyes landed on her. “I apologize for yelling, but look, you’re hurting her.”

“I know I made a weird first impression earlier, and I’m sorry for confusing you, but I really wanted to impress Aizawa and I knew the only way to do that was to make sure one of you fought me. I promise I’ll explain everything to you. ” She took a deep breath, letting out a loud sigh as the voices in her head died down. “I was born around here, my birth parents actually lived right down the street from Shoto.” All eyes fell on him, as his neutral stare turned slightly confused. “That’s odd, I don’t remember you.” “Don’t worry about it. I, um, My parents, uh, basically I lived here until I was 7, then my mom adopted me. She’s a pro hero named Aura. We moved to America for her hero work, and I lived there until a couple weeks ago. I started training at age 8, when my quirks developed, and I transferred here after I passed all the hero courses in the states. Japan really is the best place for heroes, so here I am.”

Whispers erupted in the crowd. Did she say she passed ALL the courses in America? Wait I know Aura! She’s crazy powerful. quirkS???? One voice spoke up from the back of the crowd.

“All I want to know” The crowd parted, gasping at the physical state of the speaker. “Is how this extra managed to beat ME.”

Miyako smirked at the ground, recognizing the snark in the voice talking to her. “Why, Mister Katsuki, I was just showing off. I could have beaten you without the big show. You rely too heavily on your right side - I’m assuming from years of using your right hand to write. Which is interesting, since you’re ambidextrous. I wonder why you chose your right hand over your left?” She looked up at him, his crimson eyes boring a hole into her blue ones. “You also focus too much on things flying at you rather than the people controlling those objects. All it would take for me to take you down would be a flying rock, a jab to the side, and a knee to those balls you don’t have. Don’t test me.” She smiled that wide toothed grin of hers, staring deep into his eyes and seeing that sliver of anger. “Now, for your questions about my quirks.” She stepped around Bakugo, causing steam to fly out of his ears and nose, and his eyes to see red. He stormed out of the room, Kirishima closely following on his heels.

“Hey HEY WAIT FOR ME!” Kaminari shouted, before flying out of the room after them.

“Anyways…” Miyako glanced up at the impressed looks on her classmates’ faces. “What’s the matter? Did I do something wrong?” She confusedly frowned, looking at Uraraka in confusion.

“Well it’s just that no one usually stands up to Bakugo like that.”

“And… and when they do he usually starts screaming and blasting things.”

Miyako smiled warmly, a teasing glow filling her eyes. “I guess he’s going to get a run for his money then.” __________

Miyako trudged up the stairs relatively early, the fight from earlier and then endless questions from her classmates tiring her to the point of exhaustion. Everyone is so incredibly loud here. She thought to herself. I didn’t realize how much Mom turned off her thoughts for me. She walked down the hall, as her dorm room was on the very end. She peered into the glass on her left, staring at the bags under her eyes, and rubbing them slightly. Come on Yako, what would mom say if she knew you were moving off your schedule. MOM’S NOT HERE, she shouted at herself. You’ll never succeed if you stick to her plans for you. A searing pain whipped through her skull, and she grabbed her head in pain.

I’LL NEVER LET THAT EXTRA BEAT ME AGAIN. WHAT A DUMBASS. I CAN"T BELIEVE SHE SHOWED ME UP LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. GOTTA PUT HER IN HER PLACE. YEAH.

Miyako banged on the door of her next door neighbor. “Shut the hell up Bakugo!”

“WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME EXTRA?!?!?”

“I said SHUT THE HELL UP. You think too loudly.” Miyako stumbled into her room, falling onto her bed. Prism snuggled up against her leg, knowing all of the voices were too loud for her. “Thank you baby.” She pet him twice and the voices faded away, causing her to fall into a deep sleep for the first time in the UA dorms.