#this is just. this is so crazy good i love how like

[classyrbf]

THAT D!CK IS A 10/10! — JJK MEN

SYNOPSIS...an analysis on the jjk men’s dicks just because hehe :)

INFO...jjk men x gn!reader, we’re talking about cock and balls a lot (no seriously), cum analysis, where they like to cum, heavy detail (be warned), im trying to make this a little realistic so no, gojo will not have a 12 inch dick (sorry not sorry), not proofread

OTHER...likes and reblogs are appreciated

here’s a little something while I’m being a busy bee and dealing with life (help me)

GOJO

to start off, gojo isn’t too big or isn’t small either, if anything he’s just perfect (cause he is perfect duh). He’s around 3 inches soft and 6.6 inches hard. Listen, as much as I want to make this man have the hugest dick ever, he does not and it’d cause an extreme amount of pain every time he is pounding you. He’s not too girthy either, just the average 4.3. His also slightly curves upward which is perfect for hitting your sweet spot. But he’s super sensitive on the tip! So if you tease him too much there he might just cum prematurely. His balls are definitely a decent size too, they may be on the bigger side a little but he loves to have his balls played with so have fun! When gojo cums, he cums a lot! It literally will go all over the place if he can’t control it correctly. It’s spurts out in waves and it sometimes it’s like torture cause it makes his orgasms last longer but god does it feel so good. His cum is sort of thin and runny instead of thick and goopy with a slight salty taste.

NANAMI

i personally feel like nanami is fucking packing girth wise! He is slightly smaller than gojo around like 5.75-6 inches but he is fucking girthy! It’s like a damn weapon and it’s heavy (I’ll help you carry it around nanami, don’t you worry). His girth is around 5.5-6 inches and it’s veiny! Lord help us all because he knows how to use that thing, hitting all the right angles. From being so girthy his cock slightly hangs…So what comes with a fat cock? Big breeder balls! Duh! His balls are so fat and big it’s like an instinct to suck and lick on them. He leaks a lot of precum when he’s hard so it just drips from his cock until he cums so hard. Speaking of cum, unlike gojo he has more of a thicker consistency, and instead of spurting out all over, it just flows from his cock and it’s looks so pretty like a fountain. It drips all down his cock and balls and onto his hand if he’s jerking himself off. When he’s fucking you, he definitely cums inside and just fucks his cum into you over and over until he makes a big mess.

TOJI

my man, my man, my man! Toji is definitely bigger than nanami and gojo but only by like 1-2 inches. So he’s around 7 inches which is still scary bc why are just walking around with that? He’s definitely girthy too but not like nanami, he’s more girthy around the tip of his cock and it gets slightly smaller towards the base but it’s not a huge difference. He’s tip gets really pink and red when he’s hard that it almost looks painful (don’t worry baby I’m on my way to help) but I promise he’s fine. Dare I say that doesn’t trim that often???? I feel like he has a slightly bush, nothing too crazy but it’s kind of grown out. He doesn’t care (me neither) as long as he gets laid he’s fine. His balls are mix of nanami and gojos but they hang! So when he’s fucking you they definitely slap against your skin. When toji cums it’s pretty normal, it’s sometimes shoots out a little bit and then slows down after, but it’s definitely a good amount of cum that does come out quickly. He loves to see your face or your chest covered in it because he’s a pervy little bastard for sure.

GETO

pretty boy geto hehe…let’s just say that thing curves to the left okay? He’s around 6.5-7 inches and girthy so let’s pray for everyone’s holes cause I don’t think we are making it out alive. He’s somewhere between nanami’s and Toji’s girth so…do what you will with that info. His dick is so pretty though, a pretty dick for a pretty face, the curtains match the drapes yk? He has two prominent veins that run on the underside of his dick where he’s really sensitive. If you look closely you’ll see them pulsing when he’s hard. His tip is also a very pretty pink color while his shaft and base are slightly darker than his skin tone. His balls aren’t too big either so it’s definitely more about his dick. He doesn’t cum a lot either surprisingly, he’s never been the cum everywhere and get super messy type of person but if hasnt had sex or jerked off it’ll be more than usual.

CHOSO

choso is closer to nanamis size, maybe a little smaller but not a huge difference. His is pretty average but there is nothing wrong with that (can I get free ride???). Just like geto he also has a very pink tip and his shaft is the same color as his skin. His girth is around Gojo’s but he has some big balls that are just asking to licked and sucked fr. Baby boy gets so whiny when he’s hard and leaking that he’s almost embarrassed by it, he tries to control it but he literally can’t stop getting so hard to point it drives him insane. His cum is stringy and thick, like the perfect consistency for cumming on your face, chest, ass, literally anywhere. He cums a normal amount, usually spurts out super quickly and then slows down towards the end of his orgasm.

SUKUNA

where do I even begin??? Clearly, this mf is the biggest out of all of them. He’s scary asf because he has two, yes, two dicks that are practically identical. 8-9 inches long, 4.7 girth. End my life. THIS MF GOT 4 LEGS. It’s actually cruel. They’re thicker towards the base and gradually get narrow towards the tip. So at first, the stretch doesn’t seem that bad until you realize you got about 7 inches more to go…yeah. His cocks are darker than the rest of his body and his tips are sort of like a light pink/tan color. The only difference between his cocks is that one is super veiny and the other quite literally has like 3 veins. Fat breeder balls that hang, swing, touch the floor (I’m jk) but literally the mix of toji and nanamis balls. They hold so much cum, he can literally go round for round back to back and fill up every hole of yours without taking a break. And he cums so much that it’s actually concerning. Like nanami, its overflows maybe once in a while it will shoot out.

HIGURUMA

believe it or not I think this man is packing at least 7-8 inches. It may not look like it but I think he does! He never brags about it either so it’s really hard to guess. When he’s hard his dick touches his belly button…and his balls are somewhere between Geto’s and Gojo’s size so they’re kinda average. The color is slightly tan maybe like one shade darker and he has a pale pink tip. Did I mention he has a fat tip?? It seems like it gets even bigger when he’s hard, all swollen and everything. His girth is pretty average too like Gojo’s maybe slightly bigger like 4.5 but that’s it. Higuruma doesn’t cum that much it like toji where it’s a pretty normal amount. His cum isn’t super white either, it’s kind of on the clear side and super stringy which is perfect for cumming on your tongue imo

[archangeldyke-all]

i had a crazy thought–imagine sevika's wife saying something that annoys/peeves her just a tiny bit and ceo!sevika doing the most over the top thing the next second.

imagine they live in a huge expensive modern penthouse and sevika's wife says "how come we live in the same house but we don't see each other?" and on the next day sevika is already taking her around to go see houses for sale 😭😭

or when her wife trips over the huge glass coffee table in the middle of the living room, and it's gone in the next hour and replaced by a smaller, cuter coffee table

i just wanna see sevika simping for her wife pls im begging i think she's so so cute 😭😭😭 like a grizzly bear 😭😭😭

this is like the epitome of ceo sevika i love her so fucking much

men and minors dni

you shouldn't be surprised.

this has been happening long before you and sevika were even dating, back when you were just assistant.

you can still remember the first time sevika did this to you. you ran into the office, discombobulated and late, worried that sevika would be upset.

she wasn't upset, though. it was the oppisite. she sighed in relief the moment you walked through the door wrapping you up in a hug. "fuck, i was worried you'd been carjacked on your way here! i can't lose you. not before the board meeting."

you laughed and relaxed in her arms, breathing in her expensive cologne. "sorry. my phone is fucking ancient and can't hold a charge anymore-- it died overnight and my alarm didn't go off."

"hmm." she'd said. at the time, you thought that was it.

then you got home that night, and found three brand new cell phones sitting on your doorstep.

you blinked down at the boxes, confused. a small envelope caught your eye, and you picked it up, flipping it open.

pick your favorite. -s.

the extravagance only grew once you got together.

"ugh, my back is killing me." you complained one morning.

"'s wrong?" sevika asked, a worried look in her eye. you shrug.

"think i pulled something yesterday while restocking the cabinets above the copier." you say.

that night, you pout in confusion as sevika takes the wrong exit off the highway. "where're we going?"

"you'll see."

"awe, sevika, i can't do a date night tonight baby, i feel like shit."

"it's not a date. well, it sorta is... just trust me, okay?" she'd asked. you nodded.

"of course."

sevika pulled the car into a spa parking lot. you frowned. "spatopia? aren't they closed this late?"

"i made a few calls for us." she said with a shrug, kissing you over the center console and then hopping out of the car. she ran around the car, pulling open your door and walking you to the store front.

two hours and two couples' deep tissue massages later; you were both too relaxed to drive home and you had to call an uber. it was one of the nicest gifts of your life.

now that you're married, it's only gotten worse.

you make a passing comment about your couch being stiff, and sevika's taking you furniture shopping that weekend.

you trip over a (incredibly expensive) persian rug in sevika's study more than once and she's rolling it away and buying one that doesn't snag your toes.

you once complained about the lack of legroom in her fucking porsche, so she bought you an suv. she's fucking insane.

and now she's done something truly crazy.

"you bought us a fucking house!?" you squawk. sevika shrugs with a smile. "sevika, we have a house!"

"we have a penthouse. penthouses don't have gardens. you want a garden."

"wh-- i do?!" you ask. sevika laughs.

"yeah, you do. remember? you told me on our first date what your dream house would be. you said something with charm, something you could make your own, something with a yard big enough for a garden and some pets."

the memory is so distant and blurry to you-- at the time you'd mostly just been talking out of your ass and fantasizing. but sevika remembered. because she's incredible.

"y-you're fucking insane." you cry. sevika smiles.

"good or bad?"

"sevika." you break down in tears, wrapping your arms around your wife. she laughs against you, rubbing your back. "y-you can't just buy a house without asking your wife!" you scold. she giggles.

"most people can't-- but we've got the money for it. i could buy you a dozen houses if you wanted."

"no!" you squeak. she laughs. you rip out of her arms to glare up at her. "you have got to stop doing this shit sevika, you're gonna give me a heart attack eventually!"

"you're gonna have a heart attack when you see the main bath in this place." she whispers with a sweet, excited smile. you burst into laughter and pull her in for a kiss. "if you hate it we can just put it back on the market, y'know." she mumbles. you snort.

"well... at least let me see the place first."

sevika grins, big and wide. you shake your head at her, in love and endlessly endeared by her. "i love you. i'd spoil you in any life, but i'm glad in this one i got the money to treat you the way you really deserve." she says.

you sigh dreamily and cup her face. "please tell me there's already a bed in there."

"...yeah, why?" sevika asks. you grin.

"i'm gonna ride you until you're paralyzed from the waist down, baby. c'mon. show me around my new house." you request, tugging sevika into the house by her tie.

sevika follows you with a dopey smile and hearts in her eyes.

taglist!

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@blackgaladriel

[pipthepiper]

jayce with fem reader first time being so embarassed about his cock size because he thinks it’s small but it’s actually huge.

he’s pathetically rutting into you whilst you praise him for having such a big and pretty cock!!! -🫧

▶︎ TOO BIG? | he’s just so big that it drives you insane…

▶︎ OKAY BUT ACTUALLY — this awakened something in me ngl. so much so that i’m ignoring my 10+ other drafts to write it but i didn’t say that… also i’m so sorry for how inactive i’ve been, writer’s block sucks ass. i really love all of you!! ❤️❤️💋

“oh my god, jay— fuck, mmh, so b-big—!”

your pussy is drooling around the thick cock fucking into it, walls fluttering against every wet drag n’ slide of the searing flesh. jayce had been so bashful before, mumbling and stuttering over himself about how “unsatisfying” his cock may be —

yet here he was, pounding straight into your stomach and fucking you up in every way — you were going dumb on the biggest cock you’d ever fucking seen, ears full of his ragged pants and grunts as he snaps his hips into yours painfully.

unsatisfying. bullshit. there was nothing unsatisfying about jayce talis’ pretty cock.

“so good, jay, fuck, you’re splitting me in half.” you whine out, head lolling back and shaky ankles locking at his lower back. his heavy balls smack into your ass with every powerful thrust, twitching and spasming against the flesh — he’s so thick that your walls are bruising, spread open and battered in the best way.

“god, i-i — feels so good, ‘m goin’ crazy,” jayce responds back, words breathy and pitched, punctuated by slick squelches from your pussy. his nails dig crescents into your plush thighs as he holds you up with incomparable strength, body weight only slightly supported by the desk beside you.

“me too,” you pant, grappling at his shoulders with liquified hands. “your cock is so fucking good, jay — fucks my pussy so good, fuck, don’t stop.”

jayce’s breath shudders in his lungs and his cock kicks inside your walls, your filthy words affecting him viscerally — his hips stutter ever so slightly, thrusts turning sloppy for a fraction of time; but then he’s kicking it into gear again, fucking into your sloppy pussy so fast and hard you start to see stars.

“fuck, yes! jus’ like that, jay, fuckin’ ruin me,” you mewl, drool slipping past your lip to cool against your chin. it feels so fuckin’ good; it’s intense and almost overwhelming, the feeling of being stuffed full over and over shoving a thick fog into your head and stealing your coherency completely; almost complete dumbification.

“shit i— god, you sound so sexy, ‘m not sure if i can l-last,” jayce nearly whimpers, movements sloppier than before. the kicking of his cock is consistent now, heralding a spiraling approach of his orgasm.

if you were being honest, this knowledge didn’t even disappoint you like it would have with your previous partners; on the contrary, the thought of feeling cum shoot out of his huge cock had you trembling inside.

“‘s okay, jay— jus’ keep fuckin’ me, don’t stop fuckin’ me— fuck me ‘til you cum. fill me up, jay, i want it; wanna feel this beautiful cock mess me up—!”

“shit! oh, my god, fuck, okay — please, talk to me more, tell me how good it feels, please —!”

despite the fog in your head, jayce’s plea had something clicking within it; mr. talis harbors a huge praise kink. aww, that’s so adorable.

“it feels so good, jay.” you coo, a little slurred, train of thought bouncing around with each harsh thrust inside your sloppy pussy. “your cock fucks me so good. so big and pretty, fuck, you’re amazing, jay — ‘m goin’ crazy, i love your cock.”

your ability to speak at all is completely robbed when jayce readjusts his grip on your thighs and angles his hips — and the most guttural, lewd yelp tears through your throat when he begins to slam into your body hard and fast. much harder and faster than before.

“god, pretty pussy, such a good pussy, feels s’good and tight — god, my dick feels like it’s bein’ choked, s’good—!”

you can’t even fully register jayce’s babbling through the ringing in your ears; your pussy feels as though it’s being savagely rearranged, cervix sore from countless assaults — he’s using you like some sort of toy, fucking into you for his pleasure alone.

and it feels so fucking good.

the only sounds you can produce are moans and mewls, but it’s incentive enough for jayce to continue to rut into you. there was a familiar tension building in your gut, one that became more and more intense with each shove of his cock into your walls — fuck, you were going to cum soon.

“jay— gon’a cum,” you force out, eyes rolling back and muscles melting. if jayce heard you, he didn’t answer back; not verbally, at least. but his hips did pick up even more speed, fucking you so brutally that it knocked your breath from your lungs.

“fuck—!” was the only thing you managed to yelp out before your orgasm crashed through your body, swollen clit forming its own heartbeat as it throbbed to the eddying waves of pleasure. the ringing in your ears was so loud now, overtaking every other sound in the room.

even jayce’s growl of “‘m comin’!” as his hips stuttered once, then twice, before he buried himself deep inside your cunt and stilled — thick ropes splattered hot against your walls, so copious that you could feel it leak out around jayce’s cock and slip down your ass.

by the time the ringing in your ears ceased, jayce had already come down from his high for the most part. you fluttered open eyes that you have no remembrance of closing only to find jayce staring at you with worry.

“are you okay?” he asks, voice strained and thick, and you can’t help but smile at him dopily.

“never better.” you murmur, body still tingling from aftershocks.

how the hell jayce could have ever thought of his cock as “unsatisfying” was a mystery you weren’t sure you could solve.

[quarterlifekitty]

So I've been thinking about what other areas of the body that the boys like to fuck (excluding the usual suspect ofc)

Like I could see Price being a fan of the mouth ofc. Or König with a weird obsession with tits. Maybe Gaz sliding in between barely closed thighs, the tip nudging at her little clit every few slow thrusts. Soap being an ass man...

I'm just.... I'm obsessed. Ive got a problem. But thank god I basically live in an echo chamber on this godforsaken site

Weaknesses: the road less travelled

cw: some dubcon, maybe pain play (it’s vague), some WHACKY shit in the price section (fantasy cervical penetration)

Nothing hits for Gaz quite like your soft, warm thighs. Especially first thing in the morning— hearing your sleepy little moans and gasps as his leaking cockhead spreads pre against your little pearl.

Soap is a bit similar. I think he likes feet literally everything, but what really gets him crazy? Is a pussyjob. He loves a quickie— so quick he can’t even bend you over or have you sat down. Just you and him, chest to chest as he jerks and ruts himself between your folds, clothes lifted just enough to allow contact.

Ghost likes fucking your mouth. He just likes to tease you, feed you his cock, slap your cheek and tongue with his hard dick as his pre smears onto your face. Likes it when you choke around him, but you take it— cause you love him. If you really wanna treat him, you’ll put on some eye makeup so it’ll get ruined with your tears while he’s in your throat.

Price. So. Uhm. Hear me out on this one. I’m about to get a little out there. This isn’t something he can do physically, but he does have a fantasy about fucking your womb. So sometimes you play a little bit of pretend (it was FAR into the relationship when he finally admitted this to you). He just loves the idea of you straining while his head pops in— deeper than anyone or anything has ever been— right in your unprotected breeding chamber. Like your fertility is something defended, and he’s proven himself worthy of inseminating you by getting so far inside. Sometimes he’ll press down on your abdomen to create a point that’s a little tighter inside you, and he’ll talk straight filth into your ear. “Y’feel how deep I am inside you, darl���? Right where I’m gonna pump my load— where I’m gonna knock you up with my baby. This cute, plump, defenseless little womb of yours. Perfect place for it, innit?”

König loves your tits. I’ve spoken of it at length. He loves to straddle you, careful about holding his weight on his knees, and have you lick up and down his cock to wet it before it slides between your breasts. He’ll spit for good measure.

Nikolai loves your ass. It’s just so versatile. Training you with plugs, playing with it using his fingers when he has you bent over and taking his cock. His favorite thing to do is insist you need it to settle down and sleep, training you you to be able to cum without him even touching your clit— your cunt empty, your ass throbbing from the intrusion.

[bunny-jpeg]

hi bunny, just got broken up with so anything to fix a broken heart would be amazing but highly need Lando Norris to be the situation.

Maybe best friends to lovers, kinky kinky good shit

heartbreak heaven

lando norris

tags: smut & fluff, friends-to-lovers, jealousy, sweet talk, break ups

a/n: i'm so sorry about that anon! break-ups are always the hardest, but i promise it does get a lot better! i hope you love this fic and maybe it soothes some of the ache from the heartbreak! i gave it a mix of romantic, fluffy, smutty goodness! - word of advice: chocolate is a great medicine for a heartbreak!

"that's crazy! i can't believe he did that." lando said as he leaned over and grabbed another tissue from the box on the coffee table, "we should kill him."

you looked at him, unamused as you took the tissue from him, "not funny, lando." you remarked as you wiped your eyes, "i can't believe he did that. he just up and left, he said that he could do it anymore. do what? am i that bad of a catch?" you huffed as you balled up the tissue, "stupid prick."

"ah well, his loss." he remarked. he was comfortable next to you on the couch with his arm draped over the back of it, "you'll get 'em next time, tiger."

you leaned up against him and exhaled deeply, "thanks, lando. nice to have a friend like you." then let out a small chuckle.

lando let you lay up against him and threw an arm around you. he sighed, "yeah... friend."

you had known lando for a while, since the karting days. your older brother was a racer, and while he didn't make it pro, you still remained closed to lando. you two were the same age and it was a a simple friendship. except lando didn't see it that way, when he was younger he never thought about happily ever afters and marriage. but, when you were around, even when you cheered on your brother, lando thought about you being mrs. norris. but time wasn't kind to him and after what felt like a dozen boyfriends, you were once again in lando's arms with tears in your eyes.

"you can do better." he said lowly, "so much better, you have no idea." he leaned in a little closer, his arm snaked around you, "how about someone who knows what the hell they're doing. to make you feel special, to please you."

"like oscar?" you asked a little oblivious.

lando sighed before he looked you in the eyes, "no... like me." before he captured your lips in his and wrapped both arms around you shoulders.

when he pulled away, he looked at you once more. and you stared back at him with shocker, "what!?" you asked and he felt heat in his cheeks.

"i can explain-"

you pulled him in for a tight kiss once more before you held onto his shoulders tightly. you felt the excitement through both of your bodies, he pressed his forehead up against yours with his eyes closed before he asked, "bedroom?"

lando know the layout of your flat like the back of his hand. he took you by the hand and led you towards your bedroom. he flicked on the lights and you led him further into your domain. the white rug, the string lights, the soft bed with the stuffed animals on it, which included a stuffed dog that he picked up for you while overseas.

"you look good you know, even with all your runny make up." he joked, "in order to really love a girl you gotta see her in her most comfortable." it didn't help that you were in sleeping shorts and a mclaren t-shirt (another gift from lando). and then started to get his t-shirt off. you did the same to your own shirt, lando eyed the shape of your body under the t-shirt.

you looked away for a moment and asked, "does it look bad?"

lando shook his head, "oh, no way. you look.... beautiful. what the fuck were these guys thinking? obviously a waste of a beautiful woman." his hands went to the belt on his black jeans, "i have a theory, that when a guy sees a woman as beautiful as you. they get intimidated. scared little boys." he chuckled.

"because you were always scared to ask me out?"

lando nodded, "yeah, but... i can't help myself anymore. if i see you with one more guy, i'm going to crash my car into them... i want you." he practically fell to his knees in front of you while you sat on the bed. he placed a large hand on your thigh, "i can't take it anymore, i want you. i need you. i want to be with you."

you took him by the face and gazed into his beautiful eyes. you ran your thumb across his bottom lip and nodded, "then after this.. you show me all the other ways a proper man should treat a woman."

lando took you by the hand and pushed your wrist up against his face, he exhaled deeply and said, "of course... every way i can."

you both were soon up by the pillows, lando's large hands on you as he held onto your shoulders to kiss you. the kiss was heavy, near bruising on your lips. the bed shifted under the both of you as you stripped of your clothes. you were left bare for lando as he felt up your skin.

he took in the sight of you, enough distance to admire your face and body, you looked heavenly, like a divine being. laid out on the soft covers of your bed. the male species must be a bunch of goddamn idiots. he laid you out on the bed, he admired your beauty as he felt you up. he swallowed and said, "beautiful, you know that right? beauty beyond words." then laughed a little as he captured your lips with his once more.

"please, lando." you reached over into the drawer of the nightstand and pulled out a condom, "no ifs, ands, or buts." and lando took it happily. it was quite erotic seeing lando put on a condom. it arose something in you, you couldn't quite put into words. and then when he was back between your legs once more. you smiled up at him and said, "you look good with one on."

"better safe than sorry." he remarked, "now, relax... i've been waiting for this for a long, long time." his childhood friend, his first crush, was now under him on her bed all spread out and perfect for him. one hand on his cock and another on your hip, he slowly sank into you and felt a shudder through his body. it felt hot, very hot.

"how does it feel?" you asked, for a moment you were self conscious. you knew that lando could have any woman he wanted, there were tons of grid bunnies, models and beyond who would die for a piece of lando. it made you feel a little self conscious in yourself.

"how does it feel? it feels amazing, fuck. you feel as good as you look. holy shit." he chuckled softly, "you have no idea what you do to me. all the times i thought about you. yearned for you. the longest crush i've ever had." he said as he held your hips and continued to move against you.

"no need to flatter me, lando. you already have me." then yelped when lando hiked your hips up a little bit.

lando chuckled as he moved against you faster, "i love when you say that, how that sounds on your tongue. your sweet voice telling me that i have you. but call me greedy, beautiful, because i want all of you." his pace quickened and he leaned in further towards you.

"fuck, lando." you groaned. you wondered where he learned those words. you felt the shudder through you as the pleasure continued to course through you, the patter of your heart grew as he continued to love you.

"that's it, angel. that's it." he groaned as he rutted against you, "jesus christ, you're beautiful. you have no idea what you do to me. fuck, i could name all the times i saw you and my jaw dropped."

"flirt." you moaned.

"only for you, angel." he said as he continued to move, his pace was rather feverish the more he needed you. you held onto his shoulders and he loved the feeling of your nails in his tanned shoulders. it only made him yearn for you more as he rutted against you. he could feel the heat in his cheeks and the pleasure cloud his thoughts.

it was hard to think of much else when he was buried in his sweet cunt. your cunt made him wild as he moved. he wanted more, no, he needed more. more of you, more of his first and only crush. no matter how many trophies he won, to have you in his arms was worth more than that.

he kissed you once more, and you held his face. you tried to meet his pace as his cock worked inside of you. it was hot between you two, you could feel the heat at your temples as you kept your legs up to keep him fucking you.

you tensed up at the feeling, at his words. when he pulled away from the kiss, you two gazed at one another. you didn't think that you'd ever be with lando, but there he was. he gazed at you with a heated want as the two of you continued to move against one another. it felt electric, hot in a way that made your core swirl.

he was erotic, painfully hot. you felt the pleasure grow in your body. it was something else, a totally different feeling. you groaned, "fucking hell, lando."

lando beamed down at you and continued to fuck you. the kisses continued soon after and he felt the fire in his gut from the want from you. you were beyond perfect, he knew that. the way your pussy took him left him hungry for more.

"you're amazing." he said lowly, "so perfect."

"not as perfect as you." you said as you kissed him on the cheek, your hands in his hair as the two of you fucked against one another with a heated passion. the fire between the both of you as you two rutted against one another.

the pleasure only bloomed in your gut as he moved against you and you moved against him. you moved together in a sort of harmony. a perfect pace of one another as the pleasure moved through both of you. it felt like heaven and it made your toes curl at the feeling.

it didn't take much longer before you held onto him and came around his cock. your cutn clenched around his cock and he rutted against you further. the two of you moved against one another heavily. the pleasure only crashed over you, and then soon after it crashed over him and he came inside of the condom. he groaned into your shoulder as he finished. you held onto him closely and the two of you continued to move against one another.

he groaned against your skin and felt the fire in his soul. it felt amazing, and as he slowed to a stop. he admired you. he saw the expression on your face and your features, the same features he loved growing up. the two of you kissed one another before lando laid in bed beside of you. he held your face when he kissed you again.

you giggled against him then pulled away. you two looked at one another and you wrapped an arm around him. you asked, "how was that?"

"oh perfect." he chuckled as he held your face, "beyond perfect." he looked at you closely and felt a sense of relief in his body. he kissed you once more then said, "i want you for the rest of my life."

and who were you say no? <3

[angelicsnekgirlthing]

@call-me-crazys-blog

This, my love, is how you make me feel.

I know it's odd to put it in a post like this but hear me out for a moment, all of you.

These heartwarming stories, these outstanding acts of kindness after the cruelty of a few men, this faith we've lost after looking at everything evil in the world and forgetting that light shines through the cracks of that concrete facade.

They remind me of you—Partially due to the rescue, how I have tried to help you, how you have helped me, and partially some of the examples given of love, kindness, effort; "Baked bread, shared a meal, looked at the stars and felt joy." Mundane, normal things for me. Things I see as average, but things that I do find happiness in; when we describe our love for you and your presence as mundane, we don't mean boring. We mean something so normal and natural, but something that every time we notice it again we can't help but smile.

Kindness is everywhere - We're both decently good at it, I think - And it can be seen more if we just keep living as we do. With and for one another, taking joy in the little things.

All the littol buggies, all the pretty fisheys, for example.

I'm grateful to know you, to be yours and for you to be mine,

and know that when I talk about just how happy you make me, remember this post — Not for the cruelty that began these stories, but for the kindness of the people who helped these pets and people through it. This is what I mean when I talk about how happy you make me. A heart-warm radiance, a gentle kindness as I am reminded that Hey, It Might Not Be So Bad, and the love of people.

I know life is hard, I know this world is scary, I know we see the cruelty in the world, but it's important we remember and act on the kindness we want to see, and add to what's already there.

“People are inherently terrible” no!!! Have you ever seen a child wait for their friend while they tie their shoelaces? Have you ever known someone who would bring hurt squirrels and rabbits and mice to the nearest vet just so it doesn’t suffer? Have you seen someone grieve? Have you ever read something that hit your heart like a freight train? Have you looked at the stars and felt an unexplainable joy? Have you ever baked bread? Have you shared a meal with a friend? Have you not seen it? All the love? All the good? I know it’s hard to see sometimes, I know there’s pain everywhere. But look, there’s a child helping another up after a hard fall. Look, there’s someone giving their umbrella to a stranger. Look, there’s someone admiring the spring flowers. Look, there’s good, there’s good, there’s good. Look!!!!

[frmisnow]

LOVE HIGH !

in which. being a lovesick loser, freshly engaged and high is a crazy combo...

it’s the way his fingers curl tighter around the joint as he watches you, the cherry burning hot, lighting his face in fleeting flickers. he doesn’t even realize how long he’s been staring, the smoke wafting around him like it’s meant to obscure the fact that he’s completely fucking smitten.

you're on the other side of the coach, twisting the little piece of shiny diamond on your finger over and over again. he can’t stop looking at it. at you. the two of you together in his mind, stitched together with vows he hasn’t even spoken yet but already knows by heart.

“you’re gonna hurt yourself like that,” you say, breaking the silence, gesturing lazily at the joint he’s forgotten to actually smoke.

"i like watching you," he mumbles in response and it's an ridiculous answer, just completely stupid. he knows it, you know it but you don’t laugh. instead, you tilt your head, curious, the light catching on your ring like it’s mocking him for how damn much you mean to him.

“you’re high,” you murmur, though there’s no bite to it. you set the cigarette down on the edge of the ashtray and lean back, one strap of your tank top slipping off your shoulder. “always get weird when you’re like this.”

weird. that’s one way to put it. completely fucked up over you would be another, but jungkook doesn’t say that. can’t. his mouth is dry as he watches the way your bare shoulder shifts when you settle deeper into the cushions.

"what are you thinking about?"

and god, he can't tell if you're being sarcastic. the way you emphasize each word, might be a good implication of just that. and yet he couldn't care less, he may even perhaps feel his own ears getting red; flushed.

he doesn’t answer, because if he does, it’ll be too much. it always is with you — the way he thinks about your laugh when he can't sleep, the way you particularly always sound like a bird sort of dying when you are laughing, the way your hands are always so damn cold for some reason but you still shove them under his shirt to steal his warmth.

your fingers trace over his features, as you lean further ahead, to reach his lips, thumb tracing over the soft familar surface.

you smell like him — or maybe he smells like you, he doesn’t even know anymore. the line blurred a long time ago. your thumb drags down from his lips, brushing his jaw, and it’s not fair.

his fingers wrap around your own, intertwining them loosely, aimlessly brushing over your palm, and silence. silence fills the room, enough to listen to his own thoughts. but those are thoughts he doesn't want to feast upon, no you rather.

so to distract himself, he kisses your hand once, twice and thrice. and finally his fingers twist the ring on you, before leaning down to press another kiss on said finger, a silent promise, swear by it.

[jeo9n]

INSTAGRAM

you’ve been texting jungkook on instagram non stop ever since he opened his account as a joke. but what you didn’t expect was for him to actually text you back.

౨ৎ

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader

genre: fluff, slow burn, friends to lovers, future smut

warnings: none

wordcount: 2k

you get woken up by your alarm at exactly 6am. like everyday, you open your eyes and the first thing you do is check your phone. catching up with everything that happened while you were asleep. texting your friends back that live in a different time zone than you.

you’re tired but you get out of bed anyway. you have to get ready for work. even if your body is screaming for you to stay in bed.

the first thing you do is make your bed so it prevents from laying back down. you already took a shower yesterday night, which you thank yourself as it saves you time this morning. so all you have to do is brush your teeth and wash your face.

when you’re done with that you make yourself a coffee and start to get dressed. you keep your outfit simple with some baggy jeans and a black long sleeve top because you’d rather be comfortable than fashionable. you always make sure to never leave the house without spraying perfume everywhere on your body. you forgot to but some on one day as you were running late, only noticing when you were already at work and someone might say it’s stupid but you didn’t feel good that day, you didn’t feel like yourself without your sweet perfume. you love to smell good, you love getting compliments on your scent, you love people smelling you before they even see you.

ever since that you never forgot to put perfume on again, but carrying around a travel size bottle of your favorite perfume in your bag just in case.

you pet your cats goodbye one last time before you leave your apartment. you hate leaving them home alone but thankfully they have each other so they are not really "alone" but it still hurts you.

you’re already on the way to the small coffee shop that you work at , as you remember you haven’t texted your boyfriend (jungkook) a good morning text yet. so you pull your phone at your pocket and text him right away. the chat is filled with hundreds of your messages texting him random stuff about how your day was and occasionally sending him some memes and reels you thought were funny.

y/n: good morning jungkoookkk!!

y/n: i’m on my way to work.

y/n: you’re probably asleep but have a good day.

you smile to yourself as you double text him. your not texting him in hopes to get a text back, cause that would be crazy. i mean, that guys is crazy famous of course he’s not going to text me back. you just think it’s funny, although sometimes you think it’s actually kinda weird and you should probably stop, but you never actually do.

as you open the door to your workplace you’re instantly greeted with the delicious smell of coffee, which reminds you, you still have your empty cup of coffee in your hands which you forgot to throw away. your coworker greets you good morning as she looks up from behind the counter.

"good morning. leslie." you greet back as you throw your coffee away. "ugh i really don’t feel like working today." you tell her, while taking of your jacket. she laughs and agrees with you.

"girl, i literally stayed up all night binge watching true crime documentaries." she tells me. "look at my eye bags! i can’t even cover them up with makeup." she says as she lifts up her hand to show me her dark eye bags. "but i guess it’s my own fault. i knew i should’ve turned the tv off after the first episode." she says in frustration and it makes me laugh. i can totally relate to her. you tell yourself one more episode and suddenly the sun comes up and you finished the whole show, wondering where the time went.

happened to me one too many times.

"yea…" you say, tying your apron at you back. "been there, done that." and she smiles softly in response. "should i make you a coffee? cause you really look like you need one." you tell her as you point to your eye bags, mocking her.

she laughs and kicks you jokingly "yes please! make it extra strong."

"will do." you say in a laugh, already on your way to the coffee machine. it’s definitely gonna be a long day for leslie today.

you put the coffee down carefully, not trying to spill the hot coffee all over the counter. "here you go, extra strong for you, your highness. " you bow to her jokingly while laughing like an idiot.

"you’re so stupid." she laughs with you, bringing the coffee up to her lips, trying to take a sip.

you worked a little longer today as usual since it was busy. but you don’t mind. working extra hours means extra money and you would never complain about that.

you take you shoes off and wash your hands as soon as you get home. after that you change into more comfy close just some sweatpants and hoodie and you already feel way better. you walk to your kitchen to feed your cats, who are acting like you leave them out to starve and never feed them. after your done with that you wash your hands again and make yourself something to eat since you only had breakfast today. you decide for pizza today as it doesn’t take long to be ready. you shove it into the oven and while you wait you brows through your phone. you lean against the counter and watch some tiktok’s to make to the time go by faster.

the pizza is done in under 20 times. thankfully. you cannot wait longer or else your stomach is gonna start eating itself. you sit down on your couch with your pizza on your lap. you try to take a bite but it’s still too hot so start browsing through netflix instead to find something to watch while your eating. when you find something your pizza has cooled down already so you start eating.

after your done, you get up and do the dishes right away so you don’t have to worry about it later. after that you decide to take a bath since you haven’t done that in a while and after that hectic day today you really need it.

the warm water hugs your body as you lay down in your bathtub. you feel your body start to relax enjoying the temperature of the water. your eyes are closed as you hear the notification sound from your phone, but you ignore it. you feel so comfortable right now you don’t want to move. so you stay put, enjoying this bath maybe a little too much.

after like twenty minutes you start to get bored and the water has gone cold, so you decide it’s time to get out. you quickly wash your body and get out. you do you skincare and brush your teeth while your body dries, after that you put some vanilla bodylotion on, quickly change into your pyjamas and head to bed, your cats joining you seconds after. one sleeps on top the pillow next to you while the one sleeps between your legs.

you go to grab your phone from your nightstand, checking it one last time before you go to sleep. your just scrolling trough your notifications not thinking anything by it. you stop at one particular notification and your hearts starts to beat faster. sitting straight in your bed, rubbing your eyes to make sure your seeing correctly. you cannot believe what you’re seeing.

jeon jungkook has fucking texted you back.

not only once. he double texted you back.

is this really happening right now?

abcdefghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz: woww! how long have you been texting me for ? there are like a thousand messages lol

abcdefghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz: i hope you had good day at work! i just woke up.

abcdefghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz: i saw your message and there are so many. i felt bad so i texted back. looked like your were talking to yourself haha.

wait. i cannot believes this. am i dreaming?

your hands shake and you’re not sure what to text back. should i even text back? would he text back again?

i take a deep breath. my head is going crazy right now.

after you collected yourself , you text back.

y/n: lol this is awkward.

y/n: i wasn’t thinking you would actually text back.🫣

y/n: i hope my message weren’t bothering you or anything.

you struggle sending the message back cause your hands won’t stop shaking. but can you blame me? the love of my life just texting me back and my stupid ass ignored it because of that stupid bath i took.

i bite on my nails nervously, my heart is beating so fast it might jump out of my chest at any minute.

i wait for an answer back, which is stupid, i know.

just because he texted me back one time doesn’t mean he’s going to do it again.

you know he won’t. but still, you wait.

you wait for like an hour until you realize he’s actually not responding anymore so you decide to go sleep. or try to go to sleep i should say, since your mind won’t stop thinking about what had just happened.

after a while you eventually fall asleep after what felt like hours.

the next morning you get woken up again by your alarm. this time you grab your phone a little faster than usual. scrolling through your notifications with tired but curious eyes.

you eyes widen as you find his notification again.

abcdefghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz: haha no, you don’t bother me. i read through your messages last night.

abcdefghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz: you’re funny haha.

abcdefghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz: judging by the time i usually get the first message from you, i should get a message soon right?

you read the last text and it says sent an hour ago.

okay wait. he texted again? and he thinks i’m funny?

im definitely dreaming because there is no way that this is fucking happening.

your thumbs moves fast as you reply to him.

y/n: no way!!!

y/n: am i dreaming?? please tell me im not

y/n: is this really jungkook?

y/n: no, it can’t be

y/n: is someone playing with me?

someone definitely must be playing with you. because what do you mean jeon jungkook texted me back not one, but twice?

you actually cannot believe it yourself. this is crazy.

you wait a little bit to see if he’ll respond again. but nothing comes so you start getting ready for work.

how am i going get through work today, when all i can think about is him. you think to yourself.

~~~~

i hope you enjoy this chapter because im definitely excited about this fanficton ahhh

[skittles-secrets]

I just wanna say I love your writing sm! 🥰 and I’d like to request hcs on how the batboys act when they have a crush on the reader, and how they work themselves up to asking them out? Tysm!

how they act when they have a crush 😯

bruce wayne

had known the feeling all too well. he'd had lots of crushes before. bruce is worried, though, because most of his other relationships ended in some sort of crazy plot twist and he couldn't handle that again. plus, he was driving himself crazy worrying.

will they not like me after they spend more than a day with me at a time? will they break up with me when they see all the kids? how can i tell them i'm batman?

he got over it though when his eldest son, dick, hit him on the back and encouraged him. "bruce, you can't keep waiting around. if you want something, you have to get it before it's gone, okay?"

so, then he wasn't so afraid of having his little crush anymore.

dick grayson

could've asked you out a loooong time ago. he has the confidence. he has the looks. he was a fan favorite in all of gotham. so why hadn't you? well, he wasn't sure if you'd go for someone like him. he didn't know of your past relationships, let alone if you'd had any. so that's how he talked himself out of it.

it was only when he caught himself giggling at your texts to him at 3 a.m. when he realized that he was down bad. he needed to confess to you. if he didn't, he'd be stuck pining after you and laughing at your texts like a hormonal teenager for the rest of his sad, sad life.

jason todd

didn't really understand the feeling at first. he didn't get exposed to crushes and those sorts of things as a child because he didn't have the luxury of elementary school. then, he spent most of his teenage to young adult years.. well.. dead, so... it's not like he could have been dating anyone then.

that's why he was so confused and nervous. why doesn't talking to you feel like anyone else? why does he mentally scold himself after every conversation for every stupid thing he said.

he realized he had to confess to you on one of the occasions he made you smile. he realized that he wanted to do it over again a million more times, because he wanted to be the one to make you smile and laugh. he wanted to be there for you while you slept, or were sad, or scared. damn.. he really likes you.

tim drake

was no stranger to crushes. he'd always been the type to look at someone and crush on them for years, never say anything, and then it goes away when he realizes that it's never gonna work out. that's what his crush was like, pining after you.

he just automatically assumed that every person he'd like would never even consider dating him. it was weird, because he's a good looking guy and there's no reason for him to think like that.

he realized that he needed to confess to you when he found himself accidentally stalking your instagram so hard he hit the first post you ever made. also, jason called him out for it in front of damian and damian is mean so he got embarrassed and flustered and decided that it wouldn't be so bad if he actually did say something to you.

thank you so much for the request and the follow! i loved this idea, and it was so fun to write. thank you for liking my writing!

[slut-for-hyunjin]

What do you think would be Stray Kids’ favorite positions (maybe with link????)

⋆. 𐙚 ˚Stray Kids' fav positions

Chan - Reversed cowgirl

He loves grabbing you by your hip. He always does what you want and how you want it. And you love riding him, so he loves it, too.

Minho - The woman on top

Even if it's cowgirl or woman on top, Minho loves it. He loves gripping on to your ass while he thrusts in to you like crazy.

Changbin - Eagle

He's obsessed with this pose. He loves it when he can do it in anal sex. Just grabbing onto your hips to keep you in place...

Hyunjin - Cowgirl

You love to ride him, and he loves it when you ride him, too. Especially when he can make out with you while that, or when he can suck on your tits.

Jisung - Doggy style

Maybe he looks innocent, but damn. When it comes to this position, he loses his mind. When he's about to cum, he buries himself deep inside you and finishes in you.

Felix - Bend over

He loves your ass a lot, so when you bend over for him... He loses everything and he just wants to fuck you so good.

Seungmin - Back Seat Driver

He thinks it's a kind of dominance of you as you bounce up and down on him. He finds it hot and attractive; he always cums first.

Jeongin - Edging

He loves nothing, but when you edge him... You guys have normal sex, too, but he goes crazy by your edging skills...

ᯓᡣ𐭩

if i made any mistake, like i named the positions wrong, tell me in the comment section and i'll fix it!

by the way, if you liked it, don't forget to like, reblog and comment your experiences. have a nice day! ♡

×××

[littlefreakrry13]

it’s our paradise and it’s our war zone…

Lando Norris x fem!reader

Warnings: SMUT!! not very detailed tho!!

a/n: guysss this is my first time writing like ever so I’m sorry if this is absolutely horrible but I think I did kinda good for my first time writing!! enjoy😏😏

The storm outside mirrored the chaos in the room. The rain battered the windows, but it was no match for the tension crackling between you and Lando. He stood a few feet away, his chest rising and falling, his green eyes dark with frustration.

"You don't get it, do you?" His voice was sharp, cutting through the silence like a blade. "You think I'm just playing games with you? That I don't give a damn about this?"

Your arms crossed, trying to match his intensity even though your heart was pounding. "I think you're so good at shutting me out that I can't tell if you care anymore!"

His jaw tightened, his hands balling into fists at his sides. "I don't shut you out. I'm trying to protect you!"

"From what?" you fired back, your voice trembling. "From you? Because that's exactly what it feels like, Lando!"

He took a step closer, the heat radiating off him palpable. "You have no idea how much you drive me mad," he growled, his voice low and dangerous. "How every time we fight, I want to pin you against the wall and remind you exactly who you belong to."

The air left your lungs at his words, your pulse quickening as he closed the distance between you.

"Say something," he demanded, his hands gripping your arms as he stared into your eyes. "Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me you don't feel it too."

You swallowed hard, the fire in his gaze setting you alight. "I-"

But you didn't get the chance to finish. His lips were on yours before you could speak, the kiss searing and possessive. His hands gripped your waist, pulling you against him as if he couldn't stand the thought of you being even an inch away.

You whimpered against his mouth, your hands clutching his shirt as he backed you toward the wall. The kiss was a battle, each of you pouring your frustration, your anger, and your love into it.

"You think I don't care?" he growled against your lips, his hands sliding down to grip your thighs. With one swift motion, he lifted you, your legs wrapping around his waist instinctively. "You're the only thing I care about."

"Lando," you gasped as his lips moved to your neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin. His teeth grazed your collarbone, his hands gripping you so tightly you knew you'd have marks tomorrow.

"Mine," he muttered, his voice low and rough. "Every inch of you. Mine."

You tugged at his hoodie, desperate to feel him, to get closer. He let you pull it off, tossing it to the floor before his hands returned to your body, sliding up under your shirt to push it over your head.

"You drive me crazy," he murmured, his lips trailing down your neck as his hands roamed your bare skin. "But I'd rather lose my mind than lose you."

He carried you to the bed, laying you down with a controlled intensity that sent a shiver through you. His hands worked quickly, removing the rest of your clothing with a precision that left you breathless. His eyes darkened as they took in your bare body, his jaw tightening as if he was holding himself back.

"God, you're perfect," he muttered, his voice thick with emotion. "And you're mine."

"Then stop talking and show me," you challenged, your voice daring.

His lips curved into a wicked grin as he leaned down, his mouth capturing yours in a kiss that left you dizzy. "Careful what you wish for," he whispered against your lips before trailing kisses down your body.

The heat between you burned hotter with every touch, every kiss, every word. Lando's hands were everywhere, gripping your thighs, your hips, your waist as his lips worshipped your skin. When his mouth moved lower, teasing and tasting, your body arched beneath him, his name spilling from your lips like a broken mantra.

"You're so impatient," he teased, his voice vibrating against you as his fingers tightened on your thighs.

"Lando," you gasped, your voice trembling.

"That's right," he growled, his tongue and lips drawing sounds from you that made his name the only thing you could say. "Say it again."

By the time he moved back up your body, his hands bracing on either side of your head as he hovered over you, you were already undone. His face was flushed, his curls wild, and his eyes burned with a need that matched your own.

"You're mine," he repeated, his voice a low growl as he positioned himself. His movements were slow, deliberate, teasing you until you could barely breathe.

"Stop holding back," you whispered, your hands gripping his shoulders.

He let out a low laugh, leaning down to kiss you deeply as he gave you exactly what you wanted. The rhythm he set was unrelenting, each thrust deep and deliberate, sending shockwaves through your body.

His hands gripped your hips, pulling you closer, deeper, as his name fell from your lips again and again. "You feel so good," he muttered against your lips, his voice raw and unfiltered.

Your fingers dug into his back as the tension built between you, threatening to break you apart. When you finally shattered, the sound of your release sent him over the edge, his body tensing as he followed you.

He collapsed beside you, his arm draped over your waist as he pulled you close. His breath was warm against your neck, his lips brushing your skin as he whispered, "Don't you ever doubt how much I want you”

You turned to face him, your hand resting on his cheek as you smiled. "I never will again," you promised.

Because no matter how chaotic, messy, or intense it got, this was your paradise.

[sillymommy6969]

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ 𝕺BVIOUSLY CRUSHIN’

Lara Raj x fem!singer!reader

summary: popular singer, y/n l/n has made her crush a little obvious… even her fans seem to be teasing her about it

warnings: simp!reader, tease!lara, fluff, fangirling

Y/N FUMBLING & BEING A GAY DISASTER FOR LARA RAJ FOR 16 FULL MINUTES (FT. ARIANA THE WINGWOMAN)

23k likes | 546k views | 3rd Dec, 24

*Loud technical difficulty transition* [ WEVERSE LIVE ] Sophia’s love slowly turning into a Katseye live

“Okay, Eyekons are asking for us to change the song.” Sophia read off her phone. She looked over at Lara, whose phone was on aux, streaming her rnb playlist.

“Who do you guys wanna listen to?” The Indian questioned, leaning forward to explore some of the answers they were getting from the fans. There were a couple suggestions she couldn’t make out at how fast the section was moving, but she did her best to read out the names she caught. “Drake? Kanye, The Weeknd… Y/N L/N?”

“Oh my God, please play Y/N.” Dani chimed from behind.

Yoonchae clapped her hands, humming in approval. “Yes, play São Paulo by Y/N and The Weeknd, please!”

“São Paulo is so good, oh my God.” Sophia sighed, her head thrown back against Yoonchae lying on the couch. “Yoonchip and I single handedly streamed that song over a billion times, on God. It’s like our current getting ready song.”

“Yeah, Manon won’t stop playing it in my car.” Dani groaned. “I mean, I’m not really complaining, Y/N’s music is so good, but she will just play that one song over and over and over again.”

Lara furrowed her eyebrows, “Am I the only one who hasn’t listened to this new song yet?”

[ YES???? THIS WAS SO SURPRISING ]

The three of them let out individual noises of disbelief, heads turning to glare wide-eyed at the Indian singer, who glanced around at each of them with her hands held up. “What?”

“Are you serious? You haven’t heard it yet?” Sophia asked.

“Okay, you’re such an rnb person, I’m actually surprised you of all people haven’t listened to this song,” the Latina added, “You literally bursted into my room to tell me Kendrick dropped his new album, like that’s actually kinda crazy.”

Yoonchae giggled at their collective confusion.

“Girl, cancel Lara,” Sophia said to the fans, earning a harsh swat to the arm from the latter, “She isn’t streaming São Paulo, please bully her for not keeping up with godly music.”

“Sophia, that’s so mean!”

“Just play the song already! You’ll get it when you hear it!” Dani yelled over the two’s bickering.

The intro to São Paulo with Y/N chanting in Spanish began blaring through the room, before The Weeknd joined in with his vocals. It was the perfect balance between sensual and hype, and the three surrounding Lara began swaying their hips and moving their bodies to the fluid beat.

“Oh, that’s a real Latina Mami right there.” Daniela nodded.

“Oh my God, y’know what? You weren’t here when I saw this, but I barged into Dani and Manon’s room like two days ago when I heard them playing this song, and I pulled up this video of Y/N doing an interview to promote São Paulo, right?” Sophia began, and Daniela hummed loudly at the realization of what the leader was mentioning.

“Yeah, wait, we needa show Lara this.” She pulled her phone out, immediately looking for the clip they were talking about.

“Okay, so, basically there’s this clip of her talking about her inspirations for the new album and like who are her muses, and then I almost jumped out my fucking bed when she said São Paulo, this really like sensual, passionate song was inspired by our dance practice video.” Sophia’s voice raised with each word, her excitement evident as Daniela jumped in the back.

The blonde turned her phone speaker on max, as all four of them turned to focus on her screen.

“So, basically there’s this group of really talented girls called Katseye, and I’ve been on like a binging marathon of their content recently,” Y/N giggled, biting her lip as her cheeks grew pink. “And I saw this woman, this like drop-dead gorgeous woman with red hair absolutely devour the routine they were doing and she was in this outfit—I just like sat down in my studio and cranked out the song.”

The interviewer’s eyes widened at the singer’s transparency, “Wow, so she could see this interview and find out she’s the muse for the current Billboard #1 song.”

“I mean, I hope not. I wouldn’t want this to be her first impression of me, ‘cuz I don’t wanna, like, come off creepy. But when I tell you the way I dropped everything I was doing and just produced the best for this track, I’m not joking,” Y/N played with the bracelets on her wrists, fidgeting in her chair. “But, yeah, I’m glad people are lovin’ it.”

[ I have that exact tiktok liked and saved ]

“Like, I was literally screaming in Manon and Dani’s room. Girl, you have infinite rizz, like come on, you turned the Y/N L/N into an eyekon.” Sophia slapped Lara’s arm.

Daniela squealed loudly once the short clip ended, slamming her phone down onto the couch.

“I mean, come on, guys, we need Y/N on the next comeback, right?” Sophia turned to the phone, oblivious to the stunned state Lara was in. Y/N had always been an artist she admired, especially when it came to her style in creating music. How has she never heard of this song or that she was the inspiration behind it before today?

user01 leave it to lara to pull y/n

user02 Body tea-d so hard she has a #1 artist in love w her

user03 THE WAY Y/N WAS RED THE WHOLE TIME

“Lara, you should post more videos so we get more music from Y/N.” Yoonchae teased, earning loud cackles from the other two as Lara side-eyed her.

“Yoonchae knows what’s up!” Daniela yelled.

“Yeah, Lara, bust out that insane face card so we get more music from Y/N, please.” Sophia tried grabbing the glasses from Lara’s face, only for her hands to be slapped away by the Indian. “Let Lara know what kinda tiktok we should post next to get Y/N’s attention, guys.”

[ This is where the chaos really began :/ ]

*Loud technical difficulty transition* [ KATSEYE VLOG ] The Katz at the Fantasy Tour | KATSEYE • 1,522,101 views

“Everybody say ‘thank you, Lara’.” Sophia joked, clapping as the others collectively teased the Indian singer. “Lara being hot basically got us free VIP tickets to watch the Y/N L/N on tour tonight, so we’re all super grateful.”

“Yeah, backstage passes too,” Manon nodded, humming, “Somebody’s eager to meet our very own Lara Raj tonight.”

[ THEY WONT LET MY GIRL BREATHE ]

The girls let out “oohs” as Lara rolled her eyes, shaking her head. “Ya’ll, these fools have not stopped saying that ever since we got the invite. Y/N, if you’re watching this, please ignore them, ‘cuz they’re being idiots and I’m so sorry for the way they’re acting. We’re super excited to be here.”

“Hey, you can just tell her yourself later,” Daniela nudged her.

“Lord, have you guys seen the racks on this thing?” The camera panned over to where the bar was, shelves of top-shelf booze and a wide variety of liquor sat above the counter. The redhead peeked over the wall of alcohol, her whisker dimples making an appearance at her evident excitement. “Sophia, it’s time to break out those bartending skills.”

Multiple clips of the girls enjoying the concert on their individual instagram stories were strung together, videos of them dancing. One of them had Daniela and Megan grinding and twerking into each other, another of Yoonchae and Manon fake crying at one of Y/N’s more emotional songs. The last one is a picture Sophia posted of Lara leaning over the railing of their lounge’s balcony, just watching the show with the double eyes emoji above the Indian’s head.

At the end of the concert, Katseye is assisted backstage, where a room was set up for meet and greets happening in a bit. The girls all shared little noises of excitement, teasing Lara when the singer tried adjusting her outfit.

“Oh my God, thanks for coming, you guys!” Y/N squealed, sweat still streaming from her forehead when she jogged up from the hall leading to her room. Strands of her hair stuck to her face, her lush lashes and glistening makeup still holding strong along her features. In her sheer performance outfit, earpiece dangling from her sweat-coated neck. She gave each member a hug, running a hand through her hair. “Sorry, I’m super gross right now, but I couldn’t wait to come meet you. Was the lounge okay? Everything to your liking?”

The girls let out collective sounds of approval, glancing between each other and nodding.

“Thank you so much for having us,” Sophia began, fulfilling her role as leader of Katseye. “It was just—wow!”

Y/N grinned, her soft laughter mingling with the girls’.

“Girl, when I say you looked so good when you were strutting down the stage,” Daniela sighed, kissing the bunched tips of her fingers, “The hair, the fit, the face card, all absolutely ate.”

“Oh my God, yeah! And when you like thrusted down into that split, that was so impressive, I, like—my jaw dropped.” Megan agreed, her eyes wide and her hands waving descriptively.

“Babe, you know how to put on a show,” Manon nodded theatrically, “I mean, you know how to put on a f—a show.” She caught herself before she swore in front of the cameras. “The booth gave us the perfect view of the stage and the amount of times we got gagged by how angelic your voice was is actually insane, I mean, you stay deliverin’.”

Y/N giggled, “Thank you, I’m glad you guys enjoyed it.”

Yoonchae looked a little shy, a bright smile on her face, but a reluctance to speak. Y/N slung an arm over her shoulder carefully, giving the youngest a light squeeze. “I heard you’re a big fan, Yoonchae.” She leant into the Korean, who blushed, a hand beside her mouth secretively, whispering, “Don’t tell the others, but you’re my favourite.”

“Aye, I know you did not just say that.” Manon eyed her.

The girls laughed, before Y/N’s attention fell on a certain redhead she’s been excited to meet. Lara hadn’t said anything individually besides agree with what her members were saying about the performance. Y/N shot her a soft smile.

“Lara, I was really tempted to invite you onstage for a duet, but I was really disappointed when they told me I couldn’t,” Y/N chimed, chuckling, “Did you have a good time?”

The other members shared theatrical glances, even going as to winking to their cameras to insinuate the fans were getting fed the content they’ve been asking for.

“It was crazy, I don’t think I’ve enjoyed a concert that much before,” Lara muttered softly, before accepting the taller’s open invitation to a hug. The two of them gave each other a good squeeze, the camera zooming in on Y/N rubbing Lara’s back before they pulled apart.

“I’m really glad you came,” Y/N confessed, her eyes darting between Lara’s. She was so much more different from her personality in the media, she was so much more calm, voice steady with a professional edge. And much more shameless when it came to flirting than her usual flustered state would let on. “I did hope we would meet somewhere chill for the first time, when I’m not looking like a sweaty monkey, but, hey! I got to see you, so I’m not complaining.”

Daniela and Manon both melted in amusement at the woman’s apparent attempts at flirting. Sophia and Megan did their best to hide their laughter at Lara’s inability to think of something quick and hot on the spot.

They knew her well, and they could tell she was nervous.

[ Damn, Y/N, I wasn’t familiar with your game ]

“Yeah, well, you still look jaw-dropping. If this is you at your worst, then I don’t think I’d be able to handle you at your best,” Lara bit back, and the younger singer bit her lip in response.

But catching a look from her manager behind Katseye’s camera crew, Y/N knew she needed to go get out of her outfit and freshen up before the meet and greets. She nodded, glancing up and down at Lara shamelessly. “Hey, if I could trade anything for more time, I would. But unfortunately I still have a couple things to do before I get to call it a night.” She began backing away, “It was really nice meeting you guys thought. We should all hang out soon.”

She eyed Lara last, shooting her a quick smirk before she was ushered back down the hall by her team.

The girls all let out screams of their own before attention fell back on the starred Katz of the night.

“Oh my God, did ya’ll see that? Y/N was making a move on our rising global pop sensation, Lara Raj!” Manon yelled into the camera, before shaking the mentioned in excitement.

“She was totally hitting it off with you, oh my God, I can’t believe we just witnessed that.” Sophia had a hand over her chest, as if keeping her heart from drumming out her chest.

[ Not the girls acting like they’re the ones Y/N’s flirting with ]

*Loud technical difficulty transition* [ INSTAGRAM LIVE ] hanging about with me & ari at home • @ynln

“Good morning, people of America,” Y/N practically yelled through her home in Los Angeles. She was going down the stairs, her hair pulled back into a loose pony, rogue strands of her bands falling into her face and over her glasses. Her silver hoops dangling and the strap of her white top was slipping from her shoulder. “Bienvenidos a mi casa, mis amores.”

Y/N fell back onto her couch in her living room, the newest Kendrick song playing softly in the background through her speakers. Y/N’s head fell into somebody’s lap, as she glanced at the growing number of viewers.

“Ari, did I say that right?” she asked, “It’s mis amores, right?”

Ariana Greenblatt was briefly flashed to the camera, waving with her lips pursed and her phone in her other hand. “Yeah, your accent’s getting a lot better.”

“I know. Dani’s been teaching me Español on the low.”

“Wait, Daniela from Katseye?” Ariana asked, but the live was trained on Y/N, whose head turned in the younger woman’s lap to look up and nod. “Bro, you never told me what it was like to meet them at your opening show.”

Y/N giggled, her finger raised to be bitten between her teeth. She read the comments, immediately seeing the sudden influx of fans teasing her for her obvious adoration for the group. “You guys don’t know this, but I actually invited Ari out to watch my show with Katseye in the VIP booth. The girl was so excited, and then she found out she actually had to work, so she couldn’t make it and she was so sad for so long.”

The actress groaned, yanking the phone from Y/N’s hands.

“Actually, I was the one who gave her the idea of inviting Katseye to the concert, so technically, I should’ve been the one meeting them and not this ungrateful prick.” she scoffed.

Y/N fought for her phone back, shaking her head in disbelief at the younger’s antics with a smirk on her face. “Actually,” she mocked, “I made sure to get her a signed poster. I even begged them to write a little personal message, so I don’t want to hear about it, okay?”

user01 I watch the Katseye vlog more than I see my mom

user02 when you blushed talking to lara was so cute

user03 PLEASE COLLAB W KASTEYE IM BEGGING

user04 Lara talked abt you in her recent live!

“Girl, don’t even get me started on that live. I was with my family for Christmas and I like audibly screamed at the table when I saw a clip of it,” Y/N confessed, her acrylics grazing her cheek as she covered her face in embarrassment, “Then like six of my friends sent me different clips of the live.”

“Yeah, I sent you the one of her, like, praising your LA open. Guys, full disclosure, Y/N has a fucking folder on tiktok for—!” A shrill scream abruptly cut Ariana off, the phone thrown around and away from the actress as Y/N desperately tried to keep her from revealing her secret. “Y/N—Y/N’s grown ass has a whole folder of fan edits of her and Lara. I’m—I’m not even joking, there’s over a hundred videos in it.”

Despite Y/N covering Ari’s mouth, the shorter seemed to work her way out of the singer’s grasp, exposing her between gasps.

“Stop! It’s not true, she’s fucking lying!” Colour began flushing to Y/N’s cheeks, and the singer’s frequent state of fluster returned to her face. “If any of you snitches saw me favouriting one of your edits, no you didn’t. None of you expose my ass before I embarrass myself in front of this fine woman.”

user05 Girl we don’t gotta expose you

user06 Y/N not knowing lara’s on this live is criminal

user07 lara watching this in silence rn

“No. Please tell me you’re joking,” Y/N’s face fell at the comments, immediately going to check the list of viewers. Ariana peeked at what had suddenly gotten Y/N so quiet and frightened, immediately bursting into hysteria at the reveal. “Oh, girl, ya’ll better be pulling my leg right now.”

After a couple seconds of just Y/N staring at her phone, a scared expression scalded across her face, she dropped her phone off the couch and onto the floor with a deafening shriek.

lararajj Guys I was tryna be stealthy ya’ll ruined the fun

“Oh my God, you’re cooked.” Ariana snorted, picking up the phone. The chat beckoned for the actress to reveal how Y/N was currently reacting to the situation, their request being met when Ariana turned the phone to aim at Y/N, who had moved across the room to lie face-down on the floor. “Hey, Lara, it’s Ari. Huge fan. Y/N’s just over there freaking out at how creepy she must’ve seemed and I apologize on behalf of her. She’ll be back after crashing out.”

lararajj No rush I’ll stay as long as I get to see her again

“Y/N, get your ass up and come talk to Lara.” Ariana scolded, “This ain’t how you treat a lady.”

user08 omg i just know lara’s giggling rn

user09 LARA YOU JUST BROKE THE CURRENT #1 ARTIST

user10 Leave it to the icon to spread gay panic everywhere

user11 Y/N’s never living this down oml

Eventually, Y/N trudged her way back onscreen. She looked over it, her hair a little disheveled and her cheeks pink. Her energy no longer buzzing through the phone, as Ariana held the phone out towards her.

lararajj Welcome back pretty

The singer slapped a hand onto her forehead, “Lara, babe, I’m so sorry. I swear, I have a folder for edits of me and Ariana, and another one for me and Billie. I have folders for all my friends.”

Ariana rolled her eyes, “Yeah, it’s weird. But she’s not creepy, she just loves the, like, satisfying feeling of watching edits.”

Y/N closed her eyes, shaking her head with her lips pursed. “Man, ya’ll be making me look like an idiot in front of all the baddies. I swear, you guys are the worse at keeping secrets. But I’m saying, a folder’s just a folder, guys. Nothing odd.”

lararajj Hey… who’s to say I don’t have one too?

[ omg lara has no chill. she’s really trying to kill y/n ]

*Loud technical difficulty transition* Cut to screenshots and clips of Y/N getting quoted in magazines and interviews

“I met Lara backstage at the opening show of my second world tour. Katseye came to the concert, and I had a couple moments with them after and when I started talking with Lara, there was just this, like, energy I loved from her. It felt so good—I was so comfortable just being able to chit-chat with her and I was super disappointed I didn’t get more time. But I just knew she’d become someone very special to me.” —Y/N L/N on meeting her inspiration in music, Lara for Vogue

[ YOUR HONOUR, SHES—IN LOVE? ]

“I like somebody who’s bold and knows who they are, y’know? Like somebody who’s shamelessly themselves, and makes choices even if people don’t necessarily agree with them. I take a lot of risks when I put different kinds of music out, and I really want a partner who can match that energy.” —Y/N L/N on her ideal partner for Buzzfeed

[ Omg literally how Manon and Megan described Lara ]

“When I like somebody, I won’t be able to get them off my mind. I’d write songs about them, I’d start noticing things about them, I’d talk to my friends all about them—I know it sounds pretty bad, but I’m a pretty ‘go big or go home’ girl. I try and get what I want, but I can also get pretty scared and shy, especially when I really, really like this person.” - “I’m not really meeting new people. I have somebody I really like, and I don’t feel the need to really meet anybody new.” —Y/N L/N on the way she crushes & her current dating life on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon

[ THE ONLY THING MISSING IS A NAME DROP ]

“Yeah, I try not to complicate things. Friendships in the industry can be tricky and it’s really easy for me, because I love [Katseye]. They’re all so talented and driven, and they will be your biggest cheerleaders. They’ve all got such unique perspectives and they bring so much to the table. I mean, Lara—I actually wanted to tell them all this when I met them, but I didn’t get the chance. But I definitely would like to get to know them better, it would be my dream come true.” —Y/N L/N on meeting her inspirations in music on Seventeen’s YT channel

[ Girl let her finish that sentence for science please ]

*Loud technical difficulty transition* Y/N L/N Prank Calls Billie Eilish, Ariana Greenblatt & Kendrick Lamar | Phoning It In | ELLE • 3,262,956 views

“Hi, I’m Y/N L/N. Today I’m gonna be prank calling my friends, family or team,” she introduced, smiling and waving into the camera as she sat with a leg dangling off the other, “And this is ‘Phoning It In’ with Elle.”

Y/N was asked to call Billie and ask her for extra doggie diapers from when Shark was potty training, then asked to call Dylan Minnette and make some really bad ‘13 Reasons Why’ jokes, and Ariana Greenblatt for advice on how to hide an accidental purchase of life-sized cardboard cutouts of Al Pacino from her parents. None of those pranks really struck any nerves, her shame gland was pretty tiny. It wasn’t until Y/N was asked to phone a certain Indian singer she had recently befriended was she truly experiencing anxiety.

Some b-roll of telephones and the name ‘Lara Raj’ paired with a photo of Y/N and Katseye at the solo singer’s opening stage in LA, before the video cuts back to Y/N in her chair.

She exhaled, running a hand through her hair. “I’m like, really nervous right now. I had a couple moments to walk and talk with the girls and they’re all so cool. I know, it’s still kinda hazy for me, ‘cuz I swear I passed out when Lara gave me a hug.”

The shot cut to one of Y/N holding up her ringing phone.

“Hello?” a voice chimed on the other end of the line. The video zoomed in on the phone screen, the contact name ‘LR’ with a winky face emoticon at the end clearly evident.

“Hey, Lara, it’s Y/N.” The singer could barely contain the wide grin on her face as she glanced down at her lap. Her ringed fingers picked at the waistband of the Calvin Klein layer of her pants. “I hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time.”

“Oh, hey! Haven’t heard from you in a while, I was starting to miss that sweet voice of yours.”

Lara’s low voice, combined with the flirtatious edge to the way she delivered that line made Y/N’s stomach flutter. Her mouth widened into a mix of a jaw-drop and a grin, her eyes shut as her eyebrows furrowed. Her hand came up to hover over her lips, as if keeping in whatever dirty noise she was about to let out. She held her phone away so Lara wouldn’t be able to hear her quickening breath.

[ THE FOLDING IS SO REAL ]

The Indian chuckled softly, “Babe, you there?”

The pet name had Y/N burying her flushing face into both hands. Her leg swung down, phone set on her lap as she hid her expression. However, the tips of her ears gave her fluster away, burning a bright red as she recollected her cool.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry,” she stammered, “Ahem—I was just gonna ask you a really odd question.”

Lara’s voice dropped husky, “Go ahead, love.”

Y/N inhaled deeply, pursing her lips to fight the smile creeping onto her lips. “Well, I’m on my way back to LA from New York early ‘cuz my invite for fashion week is going through some complicated verification issues, but the thing is, my house was supposed to get remodelled until I was supposed to get back in a week, so I have nowhere to stay right now.”

The Katseye member hummed, “Yeah? That’s unfortunate.”

“Yeah, and I was wondering, since you guys are some of the only people I’m friends with that live here, if I could maybe crash for a couple nights? Just until my house is done getting renovated.” Y/N played off, her voice trembling slightly at keeping her laugh contained.

“Oh, baby, that’s a loaded question,” Lara sighed, “Personally, I would say absolutely, but I have to consult with the girls too before I confirm anything. How soon are you landing?”

Y/N pretended to think for a second, “Uh, in like four hours.”

“Oh, wow, you’re coming back today.” Lara laughed, “Yeah, let me shoot the girls a text and I can get back to you in like ten?”

“For sure, no rush.” Y/N made eye contact with the camera, biting her lip. She knew there was no going back from this interaction, that the fans would definitely never let her live this moment down for as long as she breathed. “No worries if it’s a ‘no’, no pressure. I know it’s kinda last minute.”

“No, no, don’t worry about it, honey. If, and it’s a big ‘if’, the girls say no and you don’t find a place to stay, I’ll get you a hotel room for the week.” Lara offered.

[ the pet names UGH JUST COME OUT ALR ]

Y/N’s jaw dropped for the God knows how many time, her head thrown back at the amount of affection she was getting from this woman. She kinda dreaded having to break it to Lara about this being a prank call, because she actually found herself wanting to spend the night at Katseye’s dorm just for kicks. Who knows, maybe she could salvage it.

“You don’t have to do that, Lara. Don’t worry that pretty head of yours.” Y/N teased, immediately grimacing into a face of instant regret at her poor attempt at flirting.

“Well, now I have to get them to say ‘yes’.” Lara joked back, “Can’t have you all alone at a hotel when you can be here safe and sound with my pretty head, right?”

“Well, I gotta say, that’s very tempting. But I also gotta say that this is a prank. I’m sitting here with Elle right now and they asked me to give you a call.” The loud laugh coming from the other end of the line had Y/N slapping her hand against her forehead, mourning her chances with Lara at how stupid she sounded. “You’re so nice to me, I feel bad.”

“Okay, I don’t even care if it was a prank, I’m just disappointed you’re not actually gonna sleepover.”

Y/N bit her lip, her hand reaching up to dip her beanie. The tip of her acrylic came between her teeth, before she rolled her eyes with a wide grin. “I can still come over without the excuse, y’know. Normal people call it ‘hanging out’ these days.”

“Wow, really? Never heard of it,” Lara joked back.

[ Felt like I was interrupting something when I edited this ]

“We need to go out together soon—With the girls too, I mean.” Y/N said, moving her phone away from her face, as if scared of the potential rejection.

[ NICE SAVE YOU GAY HOE ]

“Absolutely. Enjoy the rest of this interview, babe, hope you don’t take advantage of anybody else’s kindness,” Lara said, letting out a low chuckle. “Call me later so we can make plans.”

Y/N hummed, “I will. Talk to you in a bit.”

When she hung up, Y/N sprung from her chair, silently freaking out at the interaction. She was so thankful Lara took that like a champ. “Oh my God, you guys are making me look so stupid in front of pretty women.”

[ There’s too much content for one video… stay tuned for pt.2! ]

[catzunnyuan]

(jiuyuan) Omegaverse AU where SY is born into PIDW like airplane. He's still tasked with making the story better and filling in plot holes which means... He has to go to CQM.

SQH clocks him as a transmigrator during disciple selection and is way too excited about it. SQQ immediately pulls rank and takes SY on as his own.

SY can't risk getting kicked out and losing all of his points, so he does the bare minimum of playing nice guy his new shizun.

SJ meanwhile likes the cut of SY's jib. He's vicious, angry, full of resentment but most importantly, playing just enough by the rules. This is a child with the potential to deal with the snakes they call martial siblings. There's no resemblance to SQH, but SQQ still suspects SY is a bastard or other relative, especially given how much the rat*hovers*, invading QJP with all manner of excuses.

SY has a grudge against MF and the system doesn't complain about SY acting on it. Soon the other disciples lose most of their respect for MF - especially since while SY clearly hates MF he's kind and gentle with everyone else

The final nail on MF's coffin is when SY reports to SQQ that MF gave him a faulty cultivation manual and proceeds to present the manual SQQ personally delivered into SY's hands.

The audacity of this child. SJ didn't realize he could still feel delight!

The next selection NYY is brought in and SY starts growling and posturing whenever SQQ so much as looks at her. He knows he's in an omegaverse variant world, but it hasn't really hit him that he will soon be afflicted by a second gender himself.

SY is made head disciple but told in no uncertain terms that if he presents qianyuan he's getting kicked off the mountain

SY isn't surprised but he does complain massively to the system.

SQQ then starts piling sy with work and quickly realizes sy is a maths genius and starts using SY's work to lord over various other peaks.

SQH gets a nice gift for pointing the boy out

Unfortunately this means SY spends a lot of time around sqq and starts... Noticing things. Call him crazy but two years on he's actually convinced sqq is an omega, not the beta he pretends to be. The next time he takes paperwork to An Ding and confirmed Airplane who says only "wait you didn't know? I thought it was obvious from his whole... Everything."

Then LBH gets chosen in selection and even though SY's not that much older than him, he still goes full weird and codependent parent.

SQQ is furious that his heir has suddenly gone off the deep end and forgotten that the world is cold and you must be colder still to survive.

He beats SY at the barest pretense but this brings the idiot unmistakable *relief*. He still tries it many more times before finally turning the whip on the problem: LBH

SY presents instantly, not going through a month-long physical, mental and hormonal transition. No, there's no time, he has to protect LBH NOW and he tries to rip out SQQ's throat with his teeth. He fails miserably and after being beaten unconscious SQQ has MF dump SY on BZP.

(YQY is very sorely tempted to take SY for himself bc Xiao-Jiu clearly loves the boy and might regret it later, but he reasons taking SY in would just make sqq hate them both more.)

SY is not suited for BZP. But he can use the raids on qjp to check on LBH and make sure he's okay. (Airplane is devastated he still can't conscript cucumber bro)

LQG is very confused to find BZP running smoothly with formal classes when he returns but he doesn't care enough to investigate before preparing to enter the lingxi caves. SY approaches and tells LQG that now isn't a good time to enter the caves for secluded meditation bc sqq will be there and disturb the qi flow

LQG is pissed bc he scheduled this time first, but he knows if he complains YQY will just say there's no problem with them both secluding at the same time. But before he can get too upset about it, this wiry disciple of his hands over a mission scroll detailing a rampaging yao. The damage is enough LQG is intrigued so he sends sy off to inform the sect leader he'll take the mission.

Blah blah demon invasion, SY jumps in front of LBH to block the poison but sqq moisturized and in his lane after secluded meditation and uninjured from the lack of fight with LQG easily prevents disaster and then kicks shl off the mountain with the help of the array he'd been setting up the entire time the matches were going on. SY realizes that definitely happened in PIDW but LBH was too untrained to realize what he was seeing.

SY then starts his Abyss training program with LBH. For this, he leans into learning BZP techniques just to teach to LBH.

At the IAC, when things go to hell, sy sends LBH away from where the abyss will open, planning to fight the rhino-python and, if necessary, go to hell himself. He doesn't realize the abyss location was "where LBH is" rather than a spot on a map. He arrives in time to find sqq SEVERELY injured from fighting MBJ and LBH already gone into the abyss.

SY stares brokenly at the shards of zhengyang before helping sqq with his wounds.

They're bad enough sqq has lost control of his hormones and pheromones and they're running rampant through his body after decades of suppression. There's no pretending he's not an omega now.

SJ has blood dripping from his mouth, at least one lung is punctured.

"I had to do it."

"I don't care what you have to say"

"you marked that beast as your own kit, but where were you?"

SY just continues applying medicine

"I know why you let him ruin you. A heavenly demon. If I hadn't sent him into the abyss, he'd already be murdered by these so-called righteous cultivators."

SJ grabs him by the collar and forces SY to meet his gaze, as unfocused as it is. SQQ'S face is red and suffering the weight of denied instincts and cycles.

"I saved your brat and where were you?"

SY comes to many conclusions in a single instant

1. SQQ may not be in heat but he's definitely not in his right mind

2. They have both been blasting their pheromones out of control the whole time

3. SQQ has clearly done whatever the opposite of "emotionality washing your hands of SY" is

4. SY's body is very, very much on the same page.

HELLO SYSTEM WHAT HE'S NOT THE PROTAGONIST OF TOXIC DOOMED DANMEI????

He decides to ignore all of that and instead get sqq to the healers. As they're staggering along, LQG shows up and immediately gets into a pissing match with SQQ over which of them has SY as an alpha and SY didn't even know LQG was an omega, let alone any of THAT and decides he's not going to deal with it and orders his shizun to get someone to collect the shards of zhengyang

-

Afterward, sqq acts like nothing happened until SY is officially guaned at which point he makes it clear that he believes SY to be his little alpha who needs to be a good boy and come home

At which point his sexuality crisis actually abates a little bc sqq is an omega, he's an alpha. That's basically a straight couple, nothing gay going on there.

LQG tells him he doesn't have to go and makes an offer of his own which sy responds to with "don't be ridiculous, you're my teacher"

(by this point one of the haha masters explained where SY came from and his tenure as head disciple of qjp so LQG is just left speechless at this bizarre leap of logic)

[dragonagepolls]

Some propaganda for the underdogs

Unnamed tavern (Redcliffe):

Via @potatoesandsunshine: #i'm in the unnamed redcliffe tavern the night after the HoF dealt with the undead and it's CRAZY in here #loghain spies on my left. militia deserters on my right. and in the middle of it all is teagan's future wife #but he's not here right now so i'm twirling my hair and falling in love with her

Via @vir-adahlen: #*slaps hoods of unnamed tavern (redcliffe) you can fit so much drunk alistair trauma dumping in here

The Gnawed Noble Tavern:

Via @ourinquisitorialness: #i know the Hanged Man is the obvious choice but i have fond memories of the Gnawed Noble Tavern and the mercs who hang out there# ''WATCH WHERE UR LOOKIN OR I'LL RIP UR DAMN EYES OUT AND PISS IN UR SKULL!!!''

Via @taashclimber: #gnawed noble taven #can you imagine the drama you’d eavesdrop on in denerim

Tapster's Tavern:

Via @trevelyawn: #absolutely tapster's #i would love to get shitfaced with a bunch of dwarves #they'd be the most fun

Via @housecantori: #anyway i always loved the layout and vibe of Tapster's

Via @queenbol-of-baldurs-gate: #im sorry but it's tapsters #the SELECTION they got??? #live music stage?? #perfect vibes

Via @gaychocolatehomicide: #i bet tapsters has fantastic pub food #and while im maybe not excited about how oghren describes the alcohol from down there #i appreciate that in later games we learned that dwarves can make good booze its just oghren that was weird

Via @librarydilf: #shout out to tapster's though. one of the only places underground i have ever liked! a warm refuge from the horrors [dwarven politics]

The Crown and Lion:

Via @heniareth: #the crown and the lion in amaranthine #fereldan food may be shit but the beer makes up for it #and they are a trading force so you know there'll be foreign brews too #who needs fancy schmancy minrarhous stuff am i right?

Via @elfmagesurana: #the crown and lion #cos everyone is so chill they let the local drunks prank the hero of ferelden which i rhink is very funny

Via @vigilskept: #you’re ALL wrong it’s literally the crown and lion #1 grey warden staying upstairs another one getting cheated on in the next room #AND a smugglers pass into the attic! what more could u ask for?

The Gull and Lantern:

Via @barkingbarghest: #Going Gull and Lantern because I've been thinking a lot about Redcliffe lately #And it felt comfortable but not like somewhere I had to dress up (the Diamond) #Also the Diamond is a casino and I generally don't like casinos. #You could argue Ferelden is not a good place to get a drink on account of being a backwater #To which I would riposte with: I like dogs and hate Tevinter.

The Cobbled Swan:

Via @crysdrawsthings: adorable sign, live music, delightful ambiance, probably serves khachapuri. Located in the Minrathous' Dock Town as it's own warning. Still, consider the khachapuri. Solid 7/10, everyone goes to the Cobbled Swam

Via @crowlore: #anyway the cobbled swan as a lounge singer sometimes so i want more of that atmosphere

Via @warden-lisme: #cobbled swan is a lowkey dockside tavern with canonically incredible live music #maybe its the chicagoan in me but im not afraid of a bar run by organized crime #i bet the appetizers are fucking incredible

[loving-family-poll]

2nd Ultimate Incest Tournament- Round 1

Propaganda under the cut:

Liam/Noel:

The Gallagher brothers have a very intense relationship that doesn't make any sense to the outside viewer unless one considers the possibility of incest. For 30 years now they have been utterly unhinged about one another in the public eye. Noel has often made incest jokes; Liam once said on-stage once "we had sex last night" referring to him and Noel. Even people writing in actual books and magazines have picked up on the vibes (some stuff that has been printed about them fully feels like it was written by tumblr incestinas except it's like. actual fucking journalists). Also there was this one time in 1996 where they kissed each other with tongue in front of 40 thousand people.

They have been described as “in love with each other” by both themselves and third parties. the lyrics “you’re my lover, i’m your brother.” they kissed with tongue at loch lomond in 1996 and have also been photographed/videoed kissing on the mouth other times. liam regularly groped noel onstage. liam’s entire twitter is just propaganda too. liam talked about impregnating noel once. noel frequently talks about how physically attractive liam is. liam claims that he’s noel’s muse

their song guess god thinks im abel has the lyrics "i could be your lover" while comparing themselves to you guessed it abel and cain. and like. a thousand more instances of them being weird about each other. also noel REALLY wanted a sister and he mentioned it quite a few times and said well liam IS basically a sister or something like that. normal behaviour

Liam literally called himself Noel's good boy on twitter, and called him god a few times after reunion. Noel said he loves make women cry and the only thing that's better is make Liam cry so he can laugh and call him a woman. They literally kissed with tongue and loch lomand is not their only kiss they have two more photos of different kissing to, they literally used the japan kiss video for reunion video. YES THEY DID THAT TF. Noel said they are head over heels in love and said it's illegal in many countries. Also Noel said Liam is like his ex-wife a few times or shit like those cunts are fucking crazy

Other people have described them as more like boyfriend/girlfriend than brothers and said they’re in love. someone on twitter asked liam “if you’re john lennon, who is noel?” and liam said “yoko ono.” another time someone said on twitter “you defo rimmed noel when you were younger” and liam replied “you jealous?"

Deeply weird about each other getting married (them not attending each other's wedding which occurred month apart and then getting divorce around the same time and they stayed at the same hotel for months), intense infamously love-hate relationship and is everyone's favorite soap opera, noel saying "on stage i just wanted him..there's only two of us that will ever get this", prominent theme of shame and crime and impossible dream in noel gallagher works, the elusive meaning of wonderwall which noel insisted is not about anyone but there's good amount of evidence that it referenced back to their childhood and their shared bedroom, liam having mental breakdown several times on twitter about noel, liam's my brother is getting a divorce playlist to which he shared with his 3 millions twitter followers, incest-baiting on main ever since the reunion, brother and lover being interchangeable for noel when writing lyrics, noel (allegedly) lying to liam that his girlfriend cheated on him in order to sabotage their relationship before oasis took off, liam hating noel's latest (ex) wife (sarah), noel writing "the owner of the star on stage" after liam's autograph and so many more insane shit

"[Liam] thinks all the songs are about him. He even thinks Wonderwall is about him." –Noel Gallagher (1997)

"It's all about me it always was and is" –Liam Gallagher (2023)

Japan kiss (kiss is at the end) loch lomand kiss

PLUS they’re back together after 14 years of estrangement! The narrative!

Edward/Alphonse:

Two brothers try to resurrect their dead mother as children and in the attempt become alchemically bonded together. Sacrificing life and limb for one another, professing to be “practically the same person,” having their bond blessed by the canonical god itself, and in one dimension sacrifice everything they’ve ever known to spend the rest of their lives together.

Canonically have their souls tied, go everywhere with each other, travel through dimensions and give up everything just to be together

Ed would kill for alphonse and alphonse would die for ed but they are so soulmate coded that they would go against their own principals too: ed would die for alphonse and alphonse would kill for ed IM OBSESSED also they keep talking about how much they need each other and wanting to touch each other constantly they gay as fuck

They need to kiss sloppy and FUCK! They are literally so canon in the 2003 anime… Al says “Brother, I want to touch you” or something like that in an episode. Ed would literally sell his soul for his brother.

[fuqnia]

SP Main Four + butters !College AU Relationship Headcanons

[☆] A/N | hii guys! i recently hit 500 likes on tumblr and i'm like so speechless... i never wouldve thought people would be interested in reading my stupid little writing hehe, so tysm! my long fic, most wanted, is coming to a close soon, and I have been working on another longfic that's a fem!reader insert x main 4 boys in college! i'm also probably going to write a more realistic/sadder headcanons, because this one was toothachingly sweet </3

[☆] C/W | NSFW under the cut, this is also for f!reader, but i'm open to writing a gn!reader or m!reader in the future

[☆] check out my !college au headcanons for the boys + butters here!

☆ stan marsh

hopeless romantic

will definitely do the most cheesy things for you

has a mixtape of songs that remind him of you

writes love letters, but never gives them to you

feels everything deeply, he's a big ol' baby

late night talks about his fears and dreams

craves emotional intimacy and trust w/ you

super duper attentive to your needs

will put you over himself

overthinks

enjoys laid-back dates! like movie dates, thrifting, strolls

gets jealous reallyyy easily

wont outright admit it tho

very insecure, if someone flirts with u, he'll just sulk LOL

avoids confrontations at all costs

not afraid to cry in front of you

vomits on you if you do something really provocative to him

always offer his jacket/hoodie to you

loves holding your hand

laces his fingers thru yours and swings your hands

goofy ah grin when you surprise him with kisses

big on cuddling

gets super flustered when his friends teases him about you

obsessed with your laugh

keeps a picture of you in his wallet

NSFW

sooo nervous during your first time with him

very eager to please!

takes his time learning what you like

kisses every inch of your body

starts with your lips and works his way down

definitely a soft dom

"does this feel good?" "tell me if you want me to stop"

loves holding your hand while in you

eats your p out like your his last meal

i think he would be more into receiving than giving, but doesn't mind giving at all!

gets shy when you compliment him and tell him how good he is making you feel

prefers gentle sex, unless you want it rough

his entire body flushes red when you tease his cock

like palming thru his shorts, or pressing quick kisses to his tip

loves to cum in your mouth

goes crazy if he gets to paint your face tho

i'm sorry but this man is into creampies...

gets turned on when you're really emotional/crying from him pleasuring you

favorite position is definitely cowgirl

definitely an ass man, loves squishing/pinching your skin

kisses your forehead, cheeks and lips after going down on you

i think he would also be kinda quiet, wouldn't let out that many moans

☆ kyle broflovski

shows his love thru actions rather than words

remembers every anniversary, even the little ones :)

makes detailed itineraries for dates

even though he's a yapper, he definitely enjoys listening to you

fiercely loyal

takes no disrespect towards you

ready to work anyone's shit as so much as they look at you funny

probably would like someone who would challenge him intellectually

needs you to have the same core values as him

DO NOT DO PDA WITH THIS MAN

he will just look at you with pure disgust if you even attempt to...

but will secretly hold hands under the table or sneak a kiss when no one is looking

puts too much pressure on himself to be perfect for you

always notices this little things about you

oh you changed your nail color? you applied your makeup differently?

will blush like crazy when you compliment him

awkwardly rubs the back of his neck

will get irrationally jealous

tries to hide it by cracking sarcastic jokes

writes you long thoughtful texts when your apart, updates you about his day, asks you how yours went

becomes super attentive when your sad or stressed

wraps you in a blanket, makes you tea

i feel like he'd hate the feeling of having a crush

but once he's in a relationship, lowkey a romantic, buy you books he'd think you'd like, jewelry that compliments your skin tone

NSFW

overthinks everything at first

constantly asks "is this okay? are you sure?"

like i said, super attentive, he needs to make sure you're okay

loves eye contact while fucking you

gets really shy when you take control but secretly loves it

prefers slow deliberate strokes and touches

has a thing for neck kisses– both giving and receiving

talks your through it

"you're perfect" "you feel so good"

gets competitive if you tease him about lasting longer

please kiss his freckles... he'll go absolutely feral

not afraid to leave hickeys, scratches or nail prints on you

wrap your legs around his waist, your arms around his neck and his life is yours LOL

i think missionary would be his favorite position

needs to see your face

it's his life mission to make you squirt...

loves fingering you

sit on his face ?

super embarrassed about his moans, but lets it out anyways lmfao

loves your titties, no matter the size

will beg you to let him cum in you

☆ kenny mccormick

we all know kenny is a natural flirt

will wink, smirk, and use cheesy pick-up lines to make you blush

loves physical affection

always has an arm around your waist

makes you laugh constantly

goes to extreme lengths to see you smile, whether it's his silly pranks or grand gestures

draws little hearts and doodles on your notebooks/texts

if he's super bored, he'll draw on your skin lmfao

super duper protective— he'll walk you home late at night and make sure you're always safe

loves taking you on adventurous dates, especially sneaking into places you're not supposed to be

calls you "babe," "sweetheart," or "princess" with that drawl of his hehe

not above embarrassing himself, will write cringe worthy poems or songs and serenade you

immediately notices when you're a little bit off

pulls you into a hug, rubbing your back

buys you little trinkets and steals snacks from eric, saying, "i saw this and thought of you!"

obsessed with kissing you, he'll lean in for a quick peck and smirks when he notices your smile

immediately goes back in for a longer kiss

i think he's super good at braiding hair, and loves playing with yours!

please wear his band tees <3

NSFW

super duper confident, definitely knows what he's doing

loves teasing you, using soft kisses and touches to drive you crazy before giving in

worships your body, tracing every curve with his lips and hands

like kyle, adores it when you take charge and being at your mercy

whispers dirty things in your ear, his voice low and sultry

"you're so fuckin' beautiful babe, I can't get enough of you."

VOCAL AS FUCK ! he'll groan, sigh, whisper your name, letting you know exactly how good you're making him feel

has a downright pornographic moan....

obviously a boob guy, he'll suck and manhandle your tits like there's no tomorrow

will cop a feel secretly infront of others as well LOL

also a thigh and neck guy—he'll kiss, nip, and mark you like he's marking a claim on you

definitely cums alot.... i'm sorry lmfao

dirty as fuck as well... spits in your mouth, puts his fingers in your mouth, making you suck him

taps his tip against your tongue, smearing his precum all over your lips

a big fan of sloppy toppy, grabbing your hair and face fucking you

he's tew good with his tongue... and so so messy when eating you out

will not hold back with his noises, literally slurping ???

loves loves loves overstimulation

favorite position is mating press, loves looking at where you guys connect

cusses when he cums

will crack some corny joke afterward to make you laugh,

"so... we're pretty good at this, huh?" and giggles like a schoolgirl

loves cuddling afterwards!

☆ eric cartman

definitely does grand gestures

brags to everyone about being in a relationship

"yeah, she's lucky to have me."

nobody believes that...

hates PDA in theory, but secretly loves it when you grab his hand or kiss his cheek

he'll complain, but his blushing face gives him away

sends you the most random memes and videos throughout the day as his way of saying he's thinking abt you <3

gets ridiculously competitive when it comes to impressing you

if someone else buys you flowers, he'll show up with a bouquet and stuffed animal, screaming profanities at the other person

jealousss to the max

glares daggers at everyone he perceives a threat, coming up with some sick and twisted plan is his head to take 'em down

gets super pouty when you tease him, but loves the banter between the two of you "i'm not fat, i'm big-boned and you know it!"

will absolutely demand you come over to "study", but in reality he just wants to spend time with you hehehe

has a soft spot when you baby him a little

like brushing his hair or adjusting his hoodie, he'll pretend to hate it but he's melting inside

if you're upset, he'll try to cheer you up in his own weird way...

usually a mix of crude jokes and awkward affection ??

please don't cry infront of him, he'll just panic

keeps a picture of you on his phone as his lock screen, and gets super defensive if anyone points it out

"shut up kahl! it's not even a big deal!"

gaslights the hell out of you, but eventually gives in when he realizes you'll just gaslight him back

will bring you up in any and every conversation, and doesn't care if it annoys the fuck out of his friends

proudly shows off your achievements and loudly declare that you're the bestest girlfriend in the world !

until you piss him off...

NSFW

talks a big game about being dominant and kinky

but he's secretly all about soft and sensual moments with you <3

loves loves loves being in control, rarely lets you take the lead

he needs to boost his ego somehow!

will grab your jaw to force you to look at him, his nails pressing hard into your cheeks

"awe, my poor baby is being fucked too dumb, can't even speak properly"

i'm sorry, but this man never shuts up in bed

whether it's dirty talk or low/breathy moans, he's always yapping

really mean too ):

depending on his mood, he'll either take you to pound town, or just veryy lazy sex

gets flustered if you tell him how good he's making you feel, and fails majorly covering it up

"well, duh. i'm amazing."

loves leaving hickeys—he'll mark you in places just barely hidden, so you're always reminded your his.

obsessed with the fat of your ass and tits, doesn't matter the size—he's all about kisses and touches

will 100% lose focus if you whisper in his ear

his cocky demeanor crumbles instantly, and he's completely at your mercy

gets embarrassed easily if you get too emotional, crying and pawing at his chest that you feel too good

this man does not own a single condom... he'll just pull out and paint your stomach

edges you when he's in a particularly bad mood, and only gives in when you're begging

definitely prefers receiving over giving, but likes the feeling of your walls clamping down on his fingers

asks you to stick out your tongue so he can see the load he blew LMFAOO WHY DID I WRITE THIS

i can't decide if he'd prefer doggy style or cowgirl, so ig just depends on his mood?

has a secret stash of candles or mood lighting for when things get "serious"

will deny deny deny it if anyone ever finds out.

his aftercare is surprisingly sweet— he'll tuck you in, grab snacks, and make sure you're comfortable before he starts pretending he doesn't care <3

☆ butters stotch

is THE definition of doting boyfriend

he'll write you sweet notes and hide them in your bag for you to find later

always asks for your opinion on everything

from what outfit he should wear to what movie the two of you should watch

he just wants to make you happy 😭

blushes like crazy when you compliment him, his hands fidgeting nervously as he stammers out a thank you

will call you every nickname under the sun

"sweet pie," "honeybunch," "cutie patootie"

he's so genuine it's impossible not to grab his cheeks and smile

loves holding hands—it makes him feel safe and connected to you

like stan, he'll swing your arms as you walk, grinning ear to ear

will apologize profusely for the tiniest things, even if it's not his fault

"oh, gosh, i’m sorry! did I step on your toe?"

keeps a running list of all your favorite things so he can surprise you with thoughtful gifts or dates!

if you're upset, he'll bake you cookies or cupcakes and sit with you until you feel better

"it's okay to cry, you know. i'm here."

absolutely adores cuddling, but gets super shy at first

once he's comfortable, he's wrapping you in the coziest of hugs

brings you flowers he picked from the campus quad, tied with a little ribbon

"i hope you like ‘em! i thought they were real purdy."

gets starry-eyed whenever you talk about your dreams or passions

he's your biggest cheerleader and believes you can do anything!

definitely giggles as you try to kiss all over his face

allows you to paint his nails, so you both can match

kisses your scratches/bruises whenever you get hurt, then patches you up himself

takes candid photos of you, so he'll always remember the feeling of moments with you <3

NSFW

don't let this man fool you...

he'll act all nervous and shy at first

he'll blush bright red when you undress in front of him

he'll nervously kiss every inch of your skin, murmuring soft compliments as he goes

he'll shyly ask, "is it okay if i touch you there?"

like he's not about to have you begging for him to keep going

once he realizes how much you're into it, he flips a switch

suddenly his shy little kisses turn into biting your lip

pinning you down

murmuring in a low voice, "i'll take care of you, baby"

he'll start slow, watching you squirm under his touch

but he's secretly enjoying the power of making you lose control

SLEEPER AGENT OF KINK

you think he's all soft neck kisses and hand-holding

then he's tugging your hair, love bites on your shoulder

and growling in your ear, "you like that, don't you?"

his hands, his mouth, and his cock alternate between gentle and rough to keep you on edge <3

the moans he'll let out would be so loud and unrestrained

completely enamored with your body

big fan of overstimulation

thrives on praise

eager to learn as well!!

positions where he can see everything—your expressions, your body, the way you react to his touch—drive him wild

not afraid to try something new!

and when it's all over, he's right back to his soft and sweet self

kissing your forehead and pulling you into his arms like he wasn't doing unspeakable things to you five minutes ago.

can you still guess who my favorite is... 💀 also i'm so sorry for whatever this was