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yaggy031910 · 1 year

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Aimée’s and Davout’s conversation about Moniteur

While I was researching a specific letter from the Davouts in marshal Davout’s memoir, published by his youngest daughter, Louise Adelaïde d’Eckmühl, in 1879, I found a conversation between our two lovebirds, Aimée Davout and Louis Nicolas Davout, about a interview the marshal supposedly gave.

Btw, thank you, @josefavomjaaga, for mentioning this interaction in one of your reblogs. I recognised these letters because you wrote about reading them in an article once.

Aimée wrote her husband on the 27th of January 1813:

Je n’ai pas reçu de lettres de toi aujourd'hui, mon unique ami; mais j'en ai lu une dans le Moniteur. Je t'avoue que je n'ai pas reconnu ta manière d'écrire accoutumée, qui est claire, énergique et noble, tandis que rien ne l’est moins que cette phrase qui est sûrement tronquée : « Une grande quantité de mes hommes (te fait-on dire) s'est éparpillée pour chercher des refuges contre la rigueur du froid, et beaucoup ont été pris. » Je suis convaincue que tu ne dis jamais mes hommes en parlant des soldates: personne n’honore plus que toi ce titre et tu as bien raison, car, en parlant des hommes on a rarement du bien à en dire, et, en parlant des soldates on sait qu’on parle de gens d’honneur sans jalousie, sans petites passions, et toujours prèts a mourir sous leurs drapeaux. On a toujours un but pour s’écarter de la vérité, et ce serais en vain mon Louis, que tu aurais cherché à dissimuler tes pertes. Chacun sait ici que la majeure parti du [première] corps a été constamment l’auxiliaire de tous les autres, et que ses pertes ont été considérables pendant notre glorieuse marche sur Moscou. Les fatigues, la rigueur de la saison au retour n’ont pas dû le refaire, mais je ne pense pas qu’il te soit arrivé pire qu’aux autres: je crois, au contraire, que la débandade dont on nous à parler dans le vingt-neuvième bulletin n’a dû se manifester parmi les troupes de ton commandment que lorsqu’il y a eu impossibilité absolue de penser à les rallier. Lors de l’ouverture de la campagne, on ne cessait d’en vanter la tenue, la discipline et le bon esprit. On ne perd pas dans un moment une supériorité réelle; mais pour être prisé à sa valeur (surtout dans la carrière des armes), il faut n’avoir pas tout contre soi. Quel que soit le mal, l’injustice est le plus grand mal; néanmoins je suis convaincue qu’elle n’abattra jamais une âme telle que la tienne et que tu n’es pas plus navré qu’un autre: quelque navré que tu sois, tu sais remonter le courage des autres, au lieu de l’abattre. J’ai été trop à même d’en faire la triste experience; et, d’ailleurs, si de pertes plus qu’ordinaires te navrent, je suis convaincue que tu ne mets pas le public dans ta confidence. - La lettre du maréchal Ney, qui est écrite pour lui, est sur un autre ton que je n’aime pas mieux: la fin de la tienne est trop larmoyante, et la sienne un peu fanfaronne… Ne me sais pas mauvais gré, mon unique ami, si je suis sortie de la sphère un peu étroite que les hommes nous ont dévolue, en épiloguant, en commentant et en jugeant; je ne puis être étrangère à ce qui te touche, voilà mon excuse; du reste, je trouve tout bon et bien, ou plutôt je ne m’informe de rien.

English Translation: I haven’t received [any] letters from you today, my unique friend, but I read one in the Moniteur. I have to admit that I didn’t recognise your usual writing style, which is clear, energetic and noble, whereas nothing is less so than this sentence, which is surely truncated: “A large number of my men (you are being told) scattered to seek refuge from the harsh cold, and many were seized.” I am convinced that you never say “my man” while talking about soldiers: No one honours this title more than you do, and you're right to do so, because when we talk about men we rarely have anything good to say about them, and when we talk about soldiers we know that we're talking about people of honour without jealousy, without petty passions, and always ready to die under their flags. One always has a purpose for deviating from the truth, and it would be in vain, my Louis, for you to have sought to conceal your losses. Everyone here knows that the major part of the [first] corps was constantly the aid of all the others, and that its losses were considerable during our glorious march on Moscow. The exertions and the harshness of the season on the retreat may not have done it again, but I don't think that it happened to you any worse than it did to others: I believe, on the contrary, that the stampede of which we were told in the twenty-ninth bulletin must only have manifested itself among the troops of your command when it was absolutely impossible to think of rallying them. At the start of the campaign, they were constantly praising their conduct, discipline and good spirit. One does not lose in a moment […] real superiority; but to be appreciated at its value (especially in the career of arms), you must not have everything against you. Whatever the evil, injustice is the greatest evil; nevertheless, I am convinced that it will never bring down a soul like yours, and that you are no more distressed than anyone else: however distressed you may be, you know how to raise the courage of others, instead of bringing it down. I was too well able to make the sad experience; and, besides, if more than ordinary losses distress you, I am convinced that you do not put the public in your confidence. - Marshal Ney's letter, which is written for him, is in another tone which I do not like any better: the end of yours is too tearful, and his a little boastful… Don't be displeased with me, my unique friend, if I have stepped out of the rather narrow sphere that men have devolved upon us, by epiloguing, commenting and judging; I can't be a stranger to what affects you, that's my excuse; besides, I find everything good and fine, or rather I don't ask about anything.

I have a new found respect for this woman. The way she is aware about the circumstances surrounding her, her husband and the army is just lovely to read.

Now, let’s look into Davout’s answer, shall we? Davout answered his wife’s little monologue in a letter written around two weeks later on the 13th of February 1813:

J’ai éprouvé, mon Aimée, une vive satisfaction en lisant toutes tes réflexions sur la lettre que tu as lue dans le Moniteur: si ton Louis en eût été le rédacteur, tu n’aurais pas été dans le cas de faire ces réflexions. Elle a été fabriquée et insérée pour détruire tous les mensonges, réellement impudents de nos ennemis, qui poussent l’effronterie jusqu’à attribuer à la supériorité de leurs armes ce qui n’est que l’effet des privations, des fatigues et des vingt-quatre degrés de froid que les troupes ont éprouvés depuis leur départ de Moscou. Si j'en eusse été le rédacteur, comme tu l'observes, je ne me serais pas servi de l'expression mes hommes en parlant des soldâtes de mon souverain, ni n’aurais remplacé cette expression par celle de mes soldates: je sçais qu’ils sont les soldates de l’Empereur; aussi je n’emploie jamais ces expressions de: mes soldates, de mon corps d’armée… Enfin, je ne me serais pas servi non plus de cette expression: - que j’étais navré de douleur. Je regrette des soldats que perd l’Empereur […]

The letter itself continues but I am not able to cite them here because the 2 following pages where the rest of this letter would be are just not there… The document jumps from page 269 (where this letter is to be found) to page 272… :(

English translation: It gave me great satisfaction, my Aimée, to read all your thoughts on the letter you read in the Moniteur: If your Louis had been the editor, you would not have been in the position to make these reflections. It has been fabricated and inserted to destroy all the lies, truly impudent by our enemies, who go so far as to attribute to the superiority of their weapons what is only the effect of the hardships, exertions and twenty-four degrees of cold that the troops have experienced since leaving Moscow. If I had been the editor, as you have observed it, I would not have used the expression my men when speaking of my sovereign's soldiers, nor would I have replaced this expression with that of my soldiers: I know that they are the Emperor's soldiers; so I never use these expressions: my soldiers, my army corps… Finally, I wouldn't have used this expression either: - that I was heartbroken. I regret soldiers the Emperor has lost […]

I appreciate these two letters a lot because it shows me how these two lovebirds interacted with one another on a daily basis. It’s a simple conversation about one article which shows so much character from both sides. Davout is such a thoughtful husband, especially considering the era they are living in. Aimée’s attention to details is just impressive and one can see that she is self aware about the hardships she had to suffer in her life and how Davout played a role in lifting her up.

Source: Blocqueville, Louise Adélaide d'Eckmühl, Le maréchal Davout, Vol. 3.

#louis nicolas davout #aimée leclerc #aimée davout #michel ney #napoleonic era #napoleon's marshals #napoleonic

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sparklysung · 4 years

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✨SWALLOW YOUR WORDS – l.d.h.✨

pairing – lee donghyuck x female!reader

genre – smut | non-idol!au, enemies to lovers!au

warnings – switch!donghyuck, switch!reader, lap dance, cumming in pants, grinding, dry humping, cum eating, hair pulling (giving and receiving), spanking, mirror sex, protected sex (reader’s on the pill), degradation, dirty talk, bondage (belt), possessiveness (i guess?)

word count – 6.043 words

summary – it only took a couple of words to make the blood boil in your veins and being the competitive individual you are, you had to prove lee donghyuck, your all-time enemy, wrong.

note – not my best, probably could've done better, but oh well. also this was frkng hard to write, damn, and i may have changed things a bit? BUT, i think it's better like this so… hope you enjoy! btw, i got the idea while reading this, so go check it out –it's good–.

taglist – @prvncejxon, @iwishihadabettername

another friday night wasting your time at some random classmate’s party. you were everything but happy to be there. you didn’t even want to go there in the first place, only finding yourself sitting on the kitchen counter, drink in hand and an ugly scowl adorning your face, because of your annoying best friend.

“hey, i get it, you didn’t wanna come here when you could have been peacefully sleeping in the comfort of your room, but come on, at least try to have some fun. you’re already here anyway.” eunbin –aka your annoying best friend– said, pouting her lips in a failed attempt of looking cute.

you kind of felt bad for her, you suppose it wasn’t exactly easy to deal with your lazy ass. but still, she was supposed to love you and appreciate you just the way you were.

and most of the time she did, just not in this specific situation.

“this isn’t fun at all, i just wanna go home. there’s nothing in here for me at all.”

you brought the red plastic cup to your lips, taking a sip of the bitter liquid eunbin had mixed for you. you weren’t lying, there really wasn’t anything that would make you want to stay, only a few friends of yours getting drunk somewhere in the big house you were currently in.

“come on, please, stay for me,” eunbin fake cried, and for a moment you thought she was going to give up and let you go. “in a bit the guys are gonna play something fun! we should join them, please?” as her last resort, she looked at you with puppy eyes. she was playing dirty and she knew it, you both knew you couldn’t resist them.

giving in with an exasperated sigh, you jumped off the counter to get yourself another drink from the bar in the living room. you were minding your own business until you heard him, the last person you wanted to see at the moment.

“so, i’m telling you guys, she was literally begging me to fuck her, she even moaned while sucking me off–,” donghyuck’s obnoxious voice filled your ears, making you roll your eyes. he was surrounded by a couple of other guys you didn’t know so well but were sure you had seen them before around campus hanging out with him.

“shut up already, dongdong, no one wants to hear it.” you interrupted, walking past him and towards the half empty bottle of vodka on the bar counter.

the group of boys stopped abruptly, all of them turning to look at you, ready for the scene that was going to take place in matter of minutes. donghyuck’s attention also turned to you, biting back a triumphant smirk with a raised eyebrow. he could see past you so he didn’t mind the mocking nickname you used; he could tell you were trying to irritate him enough to make him go away. but he wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. he had been eyeing you all night, trying to find ways to get under your skin to catch your attention. and finally, after staying at a safe distance for a while to not spark suspicions, he got what he wanted.

“why so feisty, babe.” the cocky smirk he gave you just made your blood boil, the growing desire to punch it off his pretty face only getting stronger the more you stared at him.

“don’t you get tired of talking shit all day?” you barked, eyes trained on his body while pouring yourself a good amount of alcohol.

you were certainly going to need a lot of liquid courage to get through the night.

“you boast about girls begging for you but i think you’re just trying to hide the fact that you’re the one who has to beg to get laid.”

“i don’t beg, baby.” you rolled your eyes and muttered a ‘sure’. “also, if you’re jealous of me fucking other girls you just had to say it. i wouldn’t be against giving it to you instead.” the stupid wink he threw at you made your body shake in anger, already fed up with the conversation.

“you wish, asshole.”

“actually, i do.”

donghyuck was so fucking annoying, always teasing you and never leaving you alone. your personalities clashed constantly resulting in fights filled with screams and curses, sometimes to the extent of interrupting the class and getting the two of you kicked out of it. he enjoyed watching you struggle and suffer due to his awful pranks, so you were his favorite target. you couldn’t even have a proper date with anyone because he made sure to mess it up either by scaring the crap out of the guy or sabotaging your plans. he almost completely ruined your love life and cockblocked you forever.

you did not get along and everyone knew it.

although eunbin thought it was pure sexual tension and you just needed to get your frustrations off of you with a good fuck.

it wasn’t though.

or was it?

“let’s go hang out with the guys,” your best friend nudged your arm excitedly and you sighed, not feeling like playing anything with them. every time you decided to give in and take part in ‘something fun’ with the guys, it always ended up with you either in trouble or scarred for life.

you had a bad feeling about this all.

“ugh, fine.” she cheered and pulled you through the crowd of drunk people until you reached the basement.

the sound of laughter and screams drowned the music blasting upstairs, there were empty bottles of alcohol sprawled all over the floor and tables and a circle of people in the middle of the room. both of you joined the group with you sitting between eunbin and mark, a close friend of yours that you sadly shared with donghyuck. while you casually chatted and played around with the boy, happily laughing the night away, you could feel a pair of eyes burn holes into your skull. you didn’t have to look up to know who those eyes belonged to, as said person wasn’t even trying to dissimulate.

and by said person you meant donghyuck.

donghyuck hated the way you leaned on mark’s body, how you let his friend rest his head on top of yours and wrap his arm around your waist.

he was jealous, really jealous of your close friendship with the older boy.

mark and you had been friends for a long time now and you could even consider him your best friend, so you were comfortable around each other. you usually hugged, held hands and cuddled, he was used to you wearing his clothes –half of your closet were stolen hoodies that once belonged to him–, he even had a spare change of clothes in his room just in case you decided to drop by for an improvised sleepover. so it wasn’t surprising when sometimes when the two of you hung out on your own, people –even your friends in common– mistook you as a couple.

and the idea of you two dating made donghyuck feel sick to the stomach.

“we’re playing truth or dare, who wants to start?” seoyeon, one of your friends, spoke while looking around for someone to volunteer.

“i’ll go.” lucas raised his hand and everyone nodded, not minding.

the game went smoothly for a while and eventually, the more alcohol everybody drank, the crazier things got. mark ended up getting dared to lick whipped cream off of yuta’s chest and xiaojun had to cross-dress and dance on a table. everything was fine, you hadn’t been picked by anyone yet so you were pretty much having fun just enjoying the show.

until someone called your name.

“y/n, truth or dare?” jaehyun asked with a smirk.

he had an evil glint on his eyes making you feel suspicious. you knew you couldn’t choose truth or else everyone would make fun of you for being a pussy. and jaehyun just knew you well enough to know you weren’t going to let that happen.

you weren’t one to back down.

still, the way he stared at you made an uneasy feeling settle in your stomach.

what could he possibly have in mind?

“dare.”

seems like your gut feeling was right after all.

“give hyuck a lap dance,” jaehyun said immediately after the words left you mouth, making everyone in the room shake, some in excitement and some –you– in anger. donghyuck wasn’t expecting to take part in the dare, but he really wasn’t complaining either. “thank me later babe,” his shit-eating grin only adding fuel to the fire.

fuck.

just as eunbin, donghyuck could sense the sexual tension. and unlike you, he acknowledged it.

but for him it wasn’t just that.

you two had known each other –or at least acknowledged each other's existence– for a few years now, since high school. he was forced to see you almost every day at school, so, naturally, fondness for you started growing slowly in his chest. but it wasn’t until you both left for college that your ‘enemies’ label was established.

and if someone thought he may possibly like you, they were damn right.

he did.

it all started during freshman year, when he tried to befriend you during one of the classes you shared. you seemed irritated by his advances and wanted him away from you, so after a few attempts of softening your heart, he resolved that the only way to stay close to you was annoying the hell out of you.

childish? yeah. he cared? not really.

“come here, babe.” donghyuck tongued the inside of his cheek, a smirk forming on his lips. as he saw the grim look on your face, he sprawled his legs, patting his toned thigh invitingly, eager to get things started.

the look jaehyun gave you had ‘you’re not backing down, are you?’ written all over.

“shit, i hate jaehyun, why did he have to do me dirty like that?” you mumbled angrily to eunbin and she just laughed, finding the situation way funnier than you.

“maybe tonight won’t be as boring as you thought? maybe you’ll end up getting laid.” she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively and you only scoffed, “shut up, dumbass.”

“why did you have to do me like that, huh?!” you almost screamed at the older, taking a mental note to beat him up later. he just shrugged and threw you a wink, “asshole.”

mark patted your back to help you relax, he could see you weren’t exactly happy about your dare.

“come on, which song would you like, my lady?” lucas asked, scrolling through his spotify for suiting songs.

“or nah!” yangyang answered before you could even open your mouth. just as you were about to ask for a less sexual song, cheering erupted through the room.

everyone was pumped, adrenaline running through their veins and pushing them to do stupid stuff they would probably regret the next day after waking up hungover. and things just took a rather interesting turn, so they obviously were excitedly awaiting the next series of events.

yay, more stupid memories to regret later.

on the other hand, donghyuck was as doomed as you. he knew the song well, he knew the lyrics by heart but what he didn’t know was if he could control himself with you basically dry humping him in front of a bunch of people to the rhythm of it.

he wasn’t sure it was a great idea.

as soon as you got up to complete the dare, you heard cheering and clapping. and you weren’t going to lie, you wanted to throw yourself out of a window.

breathing deeply in an attempt of relaxing to just get it over with, you made your way towards donghyuck until you were standing a few feet in front of him.

as the music started playing, you started moving. running your finger on the surface of his clothed shoulder, you walked slowly around him, like a predator circling its prey. he tried not to follow your movements, already getting anxious by your closeness and nervously waiting for your next move.

i’ma smoke this joint then i’ma break you off.

i’d be lying if i said you ain’t the one.

you pushed his legs open and settled between them. your hands rubbed his thighs teasingly, fingers drawing closer to his crotch but not quite getting there. you took your sweet time feeling him up, softly scratching his strong arms and leaving red trails behind. donghyuck was so into it, enjoying the sight of you kneeling before him so much that his pants were already starting to feel tight.

heard you not the type that you take home to mom.

is we fuckin’ when we leave the club or nah?

i ain’t spendin’ cash for nothin’ i wanna see you take it off.

and oh how he wanted to see you take it off. all night he couldn’t take his eyes off of your figure, you looked really good in the outfit eunbin had chosen for you.

so good it was almost making him drool.

you sat on his lap, hands going to caress his toned chest and stomach. it was well-known that donghyuck exercised frequently, but it still surprised you. he felt so good you had to bite your lip to prevent a sound from coming out.

when you shifted to sit closer to him, his hands flew to your hips and you could tell his intention was to move them lower to grope your ass, but you weren’t having it.

do you like the way i flick my tongue or nah?

you can ride my face until you’re drippin’ cum.

“if you try to touch me again, i’ll tie you up,” you said with a sweet smile plastered on your face, grabbing him by the wrists and harshly dropping them away from you. donghyuck let out a startled gasp at that, obviously not expecting your attitude. with his hands twitching to grasp anything, he went to grip tightly the sides of the chair.

can you lick the tip then throat the dick or nah?

can you let me stretch that pussy out or nah?

your hips ground against his crotch at such a slow pace that donghyuck was having trouble not pushing you down on him faster. he was getting embarrassingly hornier as seconds passed and wanted nothing more than to fuck you right then and there, even with his friends’ eyes on you both.

donghyuck tried so hard to restrain himself from touching you. he wasn’t one to follow orders, but he tried just for you, he really did.

i’m not the type to call you back tomorrow.

but the way you wrappin’ ‘round me is a prob.

and everything was fine until you kissed him. synchronized gasps filled the room, the sudden show of affection confusing everybody. not even your intoxicated self could understand what the hell were you doing nor who you were doing it with. his breath got stuck in his throat, heart thumping against his chest at an alarming rate. his hands almost tried to bring you closer, but he realized what he was doing on time to stop himself.

he finally broke down when your mouth sucked on his tongue, making his hips grind up against yours unconsciously as his hands grabbed you by your waist, pressing your body flush against his.

that was it.

“you asked for it,” your movements came to a stop as you took off your black leather belt, sticking to your threat of tying him up if he didn’t quit it.

pussy so good, i had to save that shit for later.

took her to the kitchen, fucked her right there on the table.

“oh shit,” donghyuck stirred under you trying to get out of the situation.

this couldn’t be happening.

“no, please,” he whimpered as you fastened the belt until it was wrapped tightly around his wrists, locking his arms behind his back. your audience was unable to hold in their surprise, some mouths falling open. he fought against the restraints to no avail, desperate to free himself, “please, let me go,” he cried out quietly, not wanting the other occupants in the room to hear him.

“stop complaining or else i’ll also gag you,” you spat harshly in his ear, done with his attitude, and he swallowed hard. as you nibbled on his lobe, you felt a strong sense of confidence. it made your chest swell in pride to see the usual big mouth jerk with a smug grin constantly attached to his face falling apart under your touch.

seems like he was the one to beg, after all.

you moved your hips to the rhythm of the music, making sure to press harder against the sensitive tip of his cock, which was already leaking precum. although you weren’t an expert, you’d given a fair share of lap dances, so you knew what you were doing.

and donghyuck could certainly tell.

don’t play with a boss, girl take it off.

take it for a real one.

you gon’ get it all.

“whose bitch are you now, huh?” donghyuck couldn’t speak properly, way too hot and bothered for his brain to come up with any smart-ass response.

you tsked disapprovingly at his lack of response.

“when i ask you a question, you answer.” your fingers tangled in his hair and with a harsh tug you forced him to look up. donghyuck was dazed, lips swollen from you biting on them, eyes glassy from arousal, and mind clouded with lust.

“yours.” he whimpered quietly, forgetting momentarily about your audience.

“good boy.”

you loved how easy it was for you to break him and leave him wanting more, to have him so putty in your hands. specially since hearing comments of other female classmates about donghyuck teasing them almost till the brim of tears was part of your day-to-day life. it felt like you were getting revenge for all of them, so you were enjoying it a lot more than anyone could imagine.

your plump lips trailed down the length of his neck, leaving wet kisses along his honey-like skin, and he threw his head back to give you more access. as you licked, sucked and bit the flesh, donghyuck could hear his heartbeat loud over the music. he usually wouldn’t let a girl suck hickeys on his skin, but the idea of you marking him while everyone watched was rather exciting.

he swore the seconds passed slower than usual. you were just halfway through the song but he didn’t know if he could survive any longer.

donghyuck felt light-headed and painfully aroused, and he wasn’t going to last long if you kept kissing him and moving your hips the way you were.

“i’ma go as far as you let me,” your movements became slower to tease him, making the poor boy want to cry in agony. his jeans felt way too tight to be comfortable and he hoped everyone could just leave you two alone to take it off.

“shit, please,” donghyuck’s eyes closed, head falling forward and hanging low as drops of sweat slid down his forehead. the room felt like an oven and he didn’t know if it was a result of the significant amount of people in such a small space, the alcohol, his choice of clothing or your body pressed closely against his.

probably the latter.

girl, is you sucking me or fucking me or nah?

can i bring another bitch? let’s have a threesome.

“keep saying you’re a freak, you gon’ prove it or nah?” you quietly sang along, pulling his face closer by his hair and grinding down on him harder.

donghyuck was going crazy, he had never expected you to be so sexy, to behave so dirtily. but he loved it, and by the prominent tent in his pants, everybody could tell he was in for the ride of his life.

you’s a ride-or-die chick, you with this shit or nah?

say you not a side bitch, you all-in or nah?

you gon’ make them eggs cheesy with them grits or nah?

you brought him in for a hot kiss that left his head spinning.

donghyuck was growing restless as his climax neared, he was so close he could almost taste it. he couldn’t remember when the last time he got so close to cumming only from some teasing was.

everything was happening so quickly he wasn’t able to stop himself before giving in to the pleasure.

“h-holy fuck,” with a shaky moan that you swallowed, donghyuck shot his load, staining the crotch of his dark jeans. you could feel the wetness seeping through the piece of clothing and dampening your bottoms. his hips gave a few more sloppy thrusts, legs shaking weakly and cock twitching from the confines of his jeans, before falling limp on the chair.

or nah.

as the song ended, he came down from his high. you freed him from the iron grip of your belt, the skin on his wrists was red and slightly swollen. you may have tightened it too much in the heat of the moment, but you weren’t apologizing after giving him probably the best orgasm of his life.

the bewildered expression on his face quickly turned grim as it hit him.

he came in his pants like a fucking teenager.

in a room full of people.

in front of his friends, yours and you.

his friends stood there, both confused and surprised to see donghyuck so affected by your touch. nobody had expected things to end the way they did.

“damn, are you okay my man?” johnny asked, laughing at his friend’s flustered state.

“shut up,” donghyuck answered bitterly. he shot up from his seat, grabbing your hand and shoving you inside the nearest bathroom in the house. he didn’t even care to cover the wet spot on his pants, walking with his chin up and a scowl plastered on his face.

and blame it on how riled up you had gotten from the feeling of his hard dick pressing against your needy pussy, but damn, he looked good.

“i wanna go next!” hendery spoke excitedly. you couldn’t tell if he was just messing with you or if he actually wanted you to give him a lap dance too. either way, it made your lips turn upwards in a smug grin.

once you both made it to the bathroom, he locked the door before pushing you against it, back pressed flush into the hard piece of wood. the ambience took a 180 turn, your confidence faltered slightly at the sight of his angry form.

“you think it’s funny, yeah?” he hummed angrily in your ear. “you think i’d let you do whatever you want and embarrass me in front of my friends just because you feel like it without payback?” the look on his eyes getting darker as the words left his mouth.

“if so, oh baby, you were so wrong.”

trying to test him, you decided to answer.

“you’re all bark and no bite, what else am i supposed to think?” you smirked devilishly when you saw him clench his jaw.

“you’re gonna regret being a brat,” his slender fingers wrapped themselves around your waist and with a harsh tug, he pulled you closer to attack your lips, biting and sucking on them, making your legs wobbly. he tasted sweet and bitter at the same time, probably from the liquor he had been drinking all night, and you couldn’t seem to get enough. his lips were soft and plush as they mingled with yours, teeth roughly clashing and tongues fighting for dominance, “am i?”

donghyuck hissed through his teeth as he unbuckled his pants, letting his cum-covered shaft spring free. he was already hard and you unconsciously rubbed your thighs together to ease some of the tension building up between them. his hand shot to your throat, tightening his grip until you couldn’t breathe properly, before forcing you on your knees.

donghyuck tapped his hard and heavy cock on your lips a couple of times before speaking. “open up, slut,” and you did as you were told, parting your lips and poking your tongue out, waiting for him to slide in.

but he didn’t.

he wanted you to lick him clean, he wanted to see you do as he said, follow his orders like a good girl without complaints.

“clean the mess you’ve done. now.”

the harsh tone of his voice sent a wave of arousal straight to your core. your hands immediately shot up to grab a hold of his length, but before you got too close he stopped you. confusion was written all over your face and for a moment you worried he had changed his mind.

“no hands, i want you to work on it only with that dirty mouth of yours.”

with your hands gripping onto his thighs, your tongue swiped from the base to the head of his cock, eagerly licking him clean. once you had swallowed every drop of his cum, your mouth took him whole, hollowing your cheeks, one hand massaging his balls. donghyuck threw his head back as yours bobbed at a rapid pace, the tip of his cock reaching the back of your throat as you swallowed around him.

when he was about to cum, he pulled away from your mouth, making you whine at the loss. wrapping his hand once again around your throat like a beautiful necklace, he forced you up on your feet. he turned you around before pulling you closer by a rough tug. your clothed ass pressed against his dick, a mixture of his arousal and your saliva wetting the cloth. your hips ground back to both tease him, desperate to feel something, anything. his hands went to the front of your jeans, rubbing his fingers over your clothed clit and a whimper fell from your lips.

“more, i need more,” you pleaded, the barrier of clothes making the feeling less pleasurable.

he surprisingly complied without resistance, dipping the digits under the restricting cloth. a deep groan vibrated against the side of your neck when he felt the wetness that had been gathering inside your panties since your dare.

“look at you, so damn wet,” his mouth watered at the feeling of your needy heat. at this point, donghyuck knew everyone had an idea of what you two could possibly be doing, and although he would enjoy returning the favour by eating you out to his heart’s content, there wasn’t enough space nor time to do so comfortably. but he swore he would make it up to you some time.

“for who is it, baby?” the answer was obvious, but still, he wanted to hear it directly from you. he inserted one long finger until it was knuckles deep inside of you and you let out a squeak, head falling back onto his shoulder.

“for you donghyuck, all for you.”

“that’s right, slut, only i can make you that wet, only i can touch you like this. you’re mine, don’t forget that,” he inserted a second finger and pumped them deeply into you.

“yes,” you breathed out softly, too far gone to fight back with a snarky remark.

although his fingers felt good and you could possibly –with a bit of an effort– cum just from them, you still wanted more. you wanted to feel the nice stretch of his cock tearing your walls apart.

“please, donghyuck.”

“what do you want?”

donghyuck knew what you wanted. fuck, he wanted it too, so bad. he had been waiting for an opportunity like this for a long time and now that he could finally have it, he was going to make the best out of it.

“fuck me,” your core ached to be filled so you swallowed your pride and spoke out.

“condom?”

“we don’t need it, i’m on the pill,” you rushed, stomach twisting and turning in excitement, “please, just fuck me.”

donghyuck’s eyes turned darker, lust clouding both of your minds with the only desire to fuck each other stupid. he pulled down your jeans so they were pooling on your ankles and went back to pump his fingers inside you to make sure you were ready to take him. as he entered you, you had to lean on the sink in front of you to hold yourself up or else you would have faceplanted the mirror.

“you feel so good, fuck, so fucking tight,” donghyuck growled when he was balls deep in you.

whimpers fell from your lips from the delicious stretch of his thick cock. after a few seconds of you adjusting to his size, you backed your ass into his hips to let him know you wanted him to move. he gave a couple of thrusts to test the waters before picking up his pace and you gripped the sides of the sink as he pounded into you. his mouth worked on your neck while you brought one of his hands under your shirt to play with your breasts.

“such a pretty sight, don’t you think?” he tugged harshly at your hair to force you to look at your reflection on the mirror, thrusts never faltering.

your makeup was ruined; lipstick smeared messily all over your lips from the hot make-out session, neck full of bruises donghyuck left to claim you, shirt pulled above your breasts displaying your puckered nipples while one of his big hands grabbed your boob as they bounced with every hard snap of his hips.

“you have no idea how many times i had to control myself not to pounce on you,” his eyes never left your quivering reflection, completely in love with the way your frame molded with his, “every single time you couldn’t keep that pretty little mouth of yours closed and all i wanted to do was shut you up with my cock.”

“f-fuck,” his thrusts turned rougher as his free hand wrapped around your neck, tightening his grip and amplifying the mind-blowing sensations he was giving you.

your asscheeks slapped against his hips, which drilled against you at an unhuman pace, hitting the right spots with every snap and making your eyes roll to the back of your head. you couldn’t keep your mouth shut, loud moans threatening to fall from your lips so you slapped your palm over your mouth to muffle your sounds.

“don’t, i want to hear you,” he gave a particularly hard thrust to try and draw a sound out of you, “i want you to be so loud that all of our friends know what we’re doing, i want them to know how good i’m making you feel.”

specially mark.

but he wasn’t going to tell you that.

“h-hyuck,” you couldn’t hold back the broken moan that fell from your lips, pleasure overtaking your body. your hands gave in and you almost fell forward, but donghyuck reacted sooner and pulled you by your hair, holding you up.

“address me properly, brat,” he growled in your ear. you felt a hard slap on your ass, the skin of the abused area stinging from the impact.

“i’m sorry… fuck, donghyuck,” your cries went straight to his dick, urging him to fuck you harder. he kneaded the flesh soothingly before spanking it again and again until you could make out the imprint of his big hand on your asscheek.

“f-faster, please,” you pleaded in a whine and he tsked, shaking his head, “such a greedy little slut.”

“what would everyone think of you if they could see you so eagerly taking my cock, mm?” donghyuck hummed, “begging for me to fuck you until you can’t walk properly?

shocks of pleasure shot through you, his dirty talk helping you reach your release faster than you anticipated. his grip on you was so tight you were sure you were going to be sore the next day. your moans turned pornographic as you neared your release, your walls squeezed around donghyuck to the point he was unable to move, so he started drawing circles over your sensitive clit to help you get off.

“let go, baby.”

and soon, his touch threw you over the edge, causing your body to shake and a broken moan to fall from your lips, legs weak as your whole weight only relied on your arms for support. he followed shortly after, grunting as he filled you up with his warm and sticky essence.

as he pulled out, a mixture of your slick juices and his seed leaked from your abused hole, dripping down your inner thighs. his fingers slid over to gather the drops of cum and opposite to your assumption, he didn’t push it back inside of you but brought the digits to your face, waiting for you to open your mouth.

“suck.”

and you did, eyes locked with his through the mirror as your tongue swirled around his fingers to lick them clean.

“fuck,” donghyuck sighed, “i didn’t know you were so dirty, sweetheart.”

and the teasing comes back.

“do you want me to remind you how i made you cum in your pants back there in a room full of people?” you rolled your eyes in disbelief and he just let out a breathy laugh.

“whatever. either way, even if they didn’t have the pleasure of fucking you or at least seeing you get fucked, they surely could hear you from how loud you were screaming my name.”

“good thing mark now knows who you belong to,” the words slipped out of his mouth before he could think and both of you shared a look of pure shock.

“did you just mention mark?”

“…no?”

“you did! what the fuck? were you jealous of mark?” you asked, eyes wide as you remembered the disgusted look on his face when you and mark got too touchy with each other during the game.

“i am jealous of mark.”

“what? why?”

“oh my god, you’re so dense.”

“shut up, i’m not.”

“yes, you are. i like you dumbass, that’s fucking why. why wouldn’t i be jealous if you two act like you’re dating but always deny it when questioned? i can give you my hoodies, i can cuddle you and hold your hand, i can spoil you with cute stuff. i can be your boyfriend, it doesn’t have to be him.”

everything was so weird.

you were supposed to be enemies for fucks sake.

but he looked cute with pouty lips.

“well, you sure have got a damn weird way of demonstrating it.”

“shut up, okay?” donghyuck snapped, done with trying to get you to shut the fuck up. “i just didn’t know how to approach you or talk to you at all, alright?” he sighed, a scowl forming on his face. “you always seem to be angry when i’m around.” the change in his voice shocked you, it was much softer now, as if he was afraid of you hearing it.

“hey, don’t beat yourself for it, alright?” you sighed, feeling bad for being so mean to him for no reason. because you really didn’t have a reason. whenever you weren’t at each other’s throats and you got time to observe him from afar, you saw how caring he was with his friends, even if most of the time he annoyed the crap out of them.

donghyuck actually seemed like a good guy… if you ignored his teasing.

maybe you didn’t hate him as much as you thought.

“so, would you be my-,”

suddenly, the sound of banging on the door resonated through the room.

“are you done already? i need to pee.”

you quickly fixed your clothes, embarrassed by the presence of someone outside the door waiting for you and donghyuck to get out and momentarily forgetting about the boy’s proposal. just as you were about to open the door and get yourself the fuck out of the situation, his arms wrapped around your waist to pull you closer and whisper to your ear in a way you could feel your panties get damp once again.

“we’re not done yet, princess.”

–lia:)

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ducavalentinos · 4 years

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Bellonci clearly had a nasty and evident hostility towards Cesare and throughout her book there are several moments of her bringing him up only to badmouth him, but this page here, that is right at the beginning, I thought it was the most interesting because is kind of an intro to how she will be presenting Cesare, and it sets up the stage for the bad fratricide telenovela she explores later on. Her claims here doesn’t escape the pattern too much of other works when dealing with Cesare, but that’s also why this page is so interesting, because it’s a good example of how many so-called “facts” about him and his life are only presented as such because they were repeated over and over again, and not because there is any substantial documented evidence behind it. So, she starts by saying: “No one could have had less vocation for the religious life than Cesare Borgia, and he was the first to admit it.” This claim is always present in most Borgia works, but it ends up being misleading because what Bellonci and other scholars considers as having the vocation for the religious life wasn’t much of a thing during Cesare’s time, not on his circle at least, at the Vatican. Having piety didn’t mattered as much as having diplomatic skills, political intelligence and the right connections. These men’s families, wealthy and noble in most cases, put them there to secure and support their interests within the Church. It was to guarantee themselves on both fronts, secular and ecclesiastical, to maintain their power and riches. That actually makes Cesare Borgia the rule and not the exception of the rule.

As for his admittance of his “lack of vocation” it can’t be seen as some definitive proof as Bellonci intends here, because whether he was being genuine or not (we will never know) we can’t ignore the political background of his “admittance”, that being: Rodrigo needed someone he trusted to accomplish his design of: 1. bringing the papal states under the full authority of the Church, and to destroy the Roman barons who were a constant source of trouble for the papacy and the city itself, and 2. to carve out a State for his family like other nobles italian families had done over the centuries. So Cesare’s speech had a very specific and difficult goal to achieve: to convince the cardinals and get the necessary votes so he could resign his cardinalate. It would be naïve to think that this speech, one in which their family’s advancement depended on, wouldn’t have been meticulously prepared by Cesare, alongside others, and with the supervision and approval of Rodrigo beforehand. And there is a some debate and assertions that Cesare forced his father into releasing him from his cardinalate, but there is no evidence for this. If anything Cesare seemed unsure, or at very least cautious about leaving his ecclesiastical life which brought him immense wealth and security, for a secular life where everything was yet to be determined. In any case, his feelings over this would have hardly mattered, the final decision about the family’s matters always came from Rodrigo. To think that Cesare had a voice, a “dark influence” over Rodrigo about these things is to underestimate the power and character of Rodrigo Borgia. He was a loving and generous father, but for that he expected nothing less than full obedience from his children, and he did not liked being contradicted. Cesare didn’t had a voice in these things anymore that Lucrezia, Juan or Gioffre did. If Rodrigo wanted him to stay a cardinal, then he would have stayed a cardinal, if Rodrigo wanted him to leave his cardinalate, then he would leave, whatever benefited their house better. “But after the collapse of the marriage negotiations with King Ferrante of Aragon, his hopes of escaping from the ecclesiastical life evaporated and it looked as if he was prepared to accept the career that his father had planned for him.” Cesare never accepted the career his father planned for him, and that he wanted to escape his ecclesiastic life, but are there any grounds for these claims? In all his years in the Church, there is not one recorded instance of Cesare showing an overwhelmingly distaste or any rebellion towards the career Rodrigo chose for him. And there is nothing, not even anecdotes hinting that he was trying to “escape it.” Taking a look at the administrative and pastoral activity that his vicars developed in their dioceses, demonstrates Cesare exercised his role dutifully and responsibly, and with interest. There is evidence of this intense management from the man he appointed for the headquarters of Pamplona, Martín Zapata. And from Jaume Conill’s pastoral work in the archbishopric of Valencia. There’s even a report from Conill to Cesare from August of 1494 in which he updates Cesare on the increase of confessions and rejoices at the shortage of victims due to the plague. Moreover Cesare wasn’t exactly as faithless as some authors like to claim he was, he had piety. It wasn’t a fervent, fanatical, blind piety, because it didn’t seem to be a trait in his family, from his father to his sister, they all had a pretty interesting and particular relationship with religion, but there’s more than one example where we can see religion was a part of his life also (another topic that needs exploring and maybe I’ll do it later), so there is nothing serious indicating that the ecclesiastical life was so alien, so dreadful for Cesare as that he sought to escape it, as it is assumed by Bellonci and others. Then she says: “What mattered to him most in any career was to avoid servility and mediocrity and to direct his energy towards the immediate acquistion of some position of authority.” I love this bit because I love how she mixes shady, groundless claims along with claims that do have more ground of being true. It’s true that Cesare always seemed to have tried to avoid mediocrity, although that wasn’t exclusive to him, the upbringing of noble children didn’t exactly leave room for mediocrity, it didn’t for Rodrigo Borgia’s children, he gave them the best education money could buy, and I don’t think he would have been satisfied with anything less than excellence from them, which in retrospect could be another reason why his relationship with Joffre wasn’t the same as his relatioship with Lucrezia, Cesare and Juan. As for avoiding servility, it’s actually difficult to ascertain. He doesn’t come across as someone who had an excessive willingness to please others (I don’t think that’s a bad thing btw lol), and maybe he did avoid it. But there’s some evidence that indicates he did enjoyed pleasing others, when possible, esp. those he appreciated it, just not at his and his family’s expense, which wasn’t that different a behavior from the rest of his family. He was generous and overall he seemed to liked being useful to people and to help solve problems. And the acquistion of some position of authority, it’s kinda of strange that Bellonci seemed to think that’s where he directed his energy towards, given that by 1492 right after his father became pope, if we judge by his letter to Piero de’ Medici, Cesare already had a pretty high position of authority, and he was perfectly aware of it. I mean after Rodrigo himself, Cesare was the one who had the most authority to deal any political affairs. Rodrigo trusted and relied on him, he was constantly by father’s side so he was privy to matters few others or no one else was. What Cesare seems to have directed his energy towards was trying to secure himself and his family’s power as much as he could so that when Rodrigo died, he wouldn’t be in a poor situation having to rely on others. It’s an entirely subjective point, we will never know what truly were his plans and feelings, but he doesn’t come across as someone wanting authority for the sake of wanting to have authority over others, nor does he seemed to have wanted power simply because he was power-hungry or something, but because he was painfully aware that all of his wealth and privileges were tied to his father, that power was essential for his survival and well-being, and that it was his responsibility (just as once it had been Rodrigo’s) to advance his family’s glory and perpetuate the legacy of the house of Borja. “Cesare was well aware of the gulf between his aspirations and reality and he had learnt the art of dissumulation. From infancy he had been destined to follow a career to which he knew he was unsuited, just as he knew Juan was ill-suited to his destined career of arms.” Bellonci is going on the premise that there was such a gulf between Cesare’s aspirations and his reality, when honestly there really wasn’t. This is a fabricated notion that comes from a modern perspective that men of the Church are men who are only fit for matters of spirituality, but as I said above, that doesn’t correspond with the reality, not even today, and definitely not in Cesare’s times. Men of the Church were first and foremost politicians and they acted both on spiritual matters as well as secular ones, even commanding armies and going full-on warriors if it was necessary. Bertrand du Pouget is a good example, also Ippolito d’Este, pope Leo IX, pope Clement VII, although he’s seen more as an anti-pope, and of course Della Rovere. Except for marriage, a churchman could do pretty much anything a layman could. Cesare surely knew that, so he wouldn't necessarily have felt this “gulf” between his reality and his aspirations, whatever those might have been, as it is claimed. His “warrior” side could be accommodated just fine within his ecclesiastic role. As for him learning the art of dissimulation, of course he did, as did Lucrezia and Rodrigo. It would a mistake to think they wore their hearts on their sleeves in public. If we’re being honest, any noble that wanted to survive the court they lived in needed a goal deal of dissimulation to go about with their lives. Cesare was no different than any of them on that. And finally, Bellonci has no way of knowing that Cesare from infancy knew he was unsuited for the career Rodrigo chosed for him, much less what he thought about Juan and his career. Bellonci is mostly projecting her own beliefs onto Cesare here and presenting it as a fact. His so-called unsuitablessness is unsubstantiated, apart from him sharing the same small vices his fellow cardinals did, as Alvisi amusingly says here: “Nè gli mancavano i piccoli vizi de’ giovani cardinali, e con loro fuggiva dalla mensa papale cui era convidato, perché vi era servita una sola vivanda. /Nor did he lack the small vices of the young cardinals, and with them he fled the papal table to which he was invited, because only one meal was served there.” And him apparently prefering to dress more as a layman than in his cardinal robes—which could have been for any number of reasons honestly, maybe he didn't liked it, yes, but also maybe it was just because they were more comfortable? esp. during the summer? and drew less attention to him? it's just a big leap to use his apparent dislike for ecclesiastical clothing as proof he hated being a churchman lol—there is surprisingly no scandals, nor accusations of bad behavior during these years of his life. Surely if he was so ill-suited, we would have at least one anecdote like the one about Rodrigo when he was still a cardinal at Siena? There is nothing of the kind. These claims come from a hindsighted stance of events, and it just serves to build up a motivation for the crime that is about to happen, without motivation, you can’t accuse Cesare as the culprit of Juan’s murder, and this personal drama is easier to sell than the simple jealousy over Sancia d’Aragona. “And so, twenty years earlier than most men, he had had to face the reality of a solitary existence, and he experienced either burning ambition or icy pessimism. His rancour doubtless played a large part in alienating him from the rest of the world, and he passed his complicated youth in that silence which is the first and last refuge of the frustrated. His sensitiveness got twisted into cruelty and made him monstrously lucid, he understood his father’s weakness, but the second-sight by which he infallibly got his own way was diabolical.” Beautiful writing, one that is meant to convince the reader he/she has a grasped the soul and mind of Cesare Borgia. But then again, as most of this paragraph, it’s all just literary without any substance. Reading Bellonci I wondered many times if she had a time machine or the Borgia family’s secret journal, because she speaks as if she were there with them, and they confessed all of their feelings and private thoughts to her. This is fiction. She is implying that his solitary existence came from the fact that his reality was at odds with his desires, when there’s no proof to suggest that was the case, and that he was kind of a lone wolf? and that’s just blatantly incorrect. Maybe we can guess he might have felt lonely sometimes in a way that people with a high intellect, people who are ahead of their time usually does because it’s difficult to find other like-minded people, but he was and remained very close to his family and some friends until the end of his life, he was far from being a solitary man. He must have experienced “icy” pessimism and burning ambition just like any human being, but it certainly wasn’t his only two emotions, and very likely had nothing to do with Juan and his own career, and more with his family’s enemies and the political scenarios he was a part of. Was it really his rancour that alienated him from the world or was that the world he lived in so hostile to him and his family that they alienated themselves in order to feel safe? Hmmmm. And I’m sorry but, throwing complicated youth and Cesare Borgia in the same sentence is simply absurd. Are we talking about the same Cesare Borgia? The handsome, incredibly rich young man? Whom his contemporaries had to admit was charming, cheerful, polite and graceful? The one that when he wasn’t studying or working hard, we see him having fun with his Spaniard buddies, have love affairs, hunting, finding any excuse for dancing and bull-fighting, basically enjoying life wherever he could, this Cesare Borgia? Give me a break, I wish my youth was as complicated as his djsdjsds. The image of this dark, sulking, frustrated man, full of bitterness is very much a product of fiction, and totally incompatible with the reports written about him. As for “his sensitiveness” that got twisted “into cruelty”, i find it irking when scholars throw these words out there and don’t bother pointing out exactly what they are referring to. Borgia scholars are always talking about Cesare’s cruelty, his alleged “mean-streak”, but they don’t give any examples. If you are going to say a person is cruel, then I, at the very least, expect you follow that by an event where their cruelty is revealed. Explain your thought process, that’s all I’m asking. What are the pieces of evidence that revels Cesare’s sensitivity? and what are the pieces of evidence that revels Cesare’s cruelty? Otherwise it’s impossible to know what you mean and I’m not going to take your assessment of this person’s character seriously. Now I understand that when scholars speak of Cesare’s sensitivity, they are usually referring to his reaction towards the men responsible for the libels slandering him and his family, and although it would be understandable for him to feel outraged, I think it’s a mistake to link Cesare’s punishment of those men with his inability to take insults as Rodrigo says to the Venetian ambassador. If Cesare really was so sensitive about insults against him and his family, wouldn’t we have a long list of his victims that died simply for the deed of having offended him? which remarkably we don’t. That implies that Cesare could take insults, but when these insults were tied up with politics, he acted. The men spreading these libels, the Savelli letter being the main one, weren’t doing so to entertain the people of Rome and Italy. It wasn’t just titillating gossip. It was a clever and effective political propaganda made by Rodrigo and Cesare’s enemies to “kill” their reputation since they couldn’t, at that moment, literally kill them. It was meant to overshadow any and all positive policies their governments were doing, and put public opinion against them. Cesare understood what his father couldn’t, and he rightly tried to contain it somehow, which brings me to these men’s punishment and how it’s the only documented example I can think of that would fit the general definition of cruelty, and even so, it’s not a great one. There’s an anecdote about Cesare shooting bandits from his balcony at the Vatican with Lucrezia by his side that imo, would fit better the definition of “wanton cruelty” and having a “mean-streak”, but the authenticity of this story can't be verified, and it seems to have been just slander. Although it is odd Lucrezia’s biographers never mention this in their works, given that they don’t seem to mind authenticity when it comes to Cesare, and it would provide them with the best example for Cesare’s cruelty they go on so much about. I wonder why that is. But when Bellonci wrote this sentence, she is aiming to conclude both her presentation of Cesare and why he murdered Juan. The whole point of this page she wrote was to create the right environment for the fratricide act. Cesare’s sensitivity made him incapable of dealing with his feelings of anger and frustration over his life, and that manifested into cruelty, that here is tied to the murder of his brother along with other crimes she uncritically pins on him, which turned him into a monster and only then he had the lucity to see what it had to be done since his father was too weak when it came to Juan. If he were to get his way, then he would have to commit a diabolical act. But apart from what I already wrote on why all the claims about Cesare’s being unsuited for this career, how he hated it and envied Juan are baseless, there’s another hole in this narrative, Rodrigo Borgia’s own decisions about Juan. They’re ambiguous af, and I think his plans weren’t always so set in stone as it is sometimes imagined, he was a shrewd, pragmatic man, so he probably changed his plans according to the political scenarios around him, and the benefits it would bring to his family and the papacy. Yes, he appointed Juan as Gonfalonier and Captain General of the Church, and invested many benefices upon him, but he also married Juan to Spain, and after the fiasco with the Orsinis (which to be fair, wasn’t just Juan’s fault) it seems he was sending Juan back to Spain, and it really looks as if Rodrigo’s design was to secure the Borgia’s power in both his native country and Italy. Juan seemed to be the one ensured to make that happen in Spain, while in Italy, it was up to Cesare, Lucrezia and Gioffre. Considering all this definitely puts obstacles to Bellonci’s assertions, and it’s easy to see why she ignored it. “His solitude was his fortress, and he used his inhuman courage and self-sufficiency to serve his idolatry of power.” No, his family was his fortress, again he was not a lone wolf, he worked in sync with his father, his brothers and his sister, and he very much relied on them and on others. He was brave, but it was far from being inhuman, and I absolutely have no idea what Bellonci means with his self-sufficiency given that his whole life was depended on others, and he knew it too, and he tried to change that. And his idolatry of power, it’s another thing scholars like to claim about him, but Cesare’s fascination with power, if we can call it that, wasn’t all that different from other nobles, and it wasn’t such to say he worshipped it. I have no idea where there came from, probably from bad interpretations of The Prince. It wasn’t a fascination of power for the sake of it. Having power at Cesare’ time and environment was tightly connected with your survival. If you were a person in a high position of power, maintaining that power was important if you wanted to keep breathing. If you lost it, you could die. Just like many spaniards did when Della Rovere became pope. The reason Cesare wasn’t among them is precisely because he had enough influence and power within the College of Cardinals to afford some protection. If he hadn’t cultivated that, if he hadn’t accumulated power in the Romagna, he would have been murdered not long after his father died, like it happened with the children of other popes. And I guess that finishes it. It’s a powerful page, but then again I do think that most Borgia authors are very talented when it comes to writing, and constructing narratives, but when you break it down phrase by phrase, weighting in the evidence that exists for such claims, 80% of the time you will come up empty handed, or with contradicting information. Many of the things said about them, esp. about their characters, it’s a historical construction, or authors’s personal interpretations of the material they studied, since much of the Borgia’s history (that was shaped by their enemies) is wrapped in mysteries and subjectivity. Bellonci’s biases are all over her work, and it’s the strongest I’ve read with so far with Borgia bios. She had a mentality of only being fair to those she sympathized with. She detested Cesare the most, so she didn’t cared about being fair to him, she accepted all sources and gossip said about him without any discernment. He is the embodiment of only bad traits and his actions only carries chaos and “dark unrest”, but also I do believe she believed most of what she wrote about him. It’s not difficult to see why. Cesare’s black legend, alongside the unfortunate Machiavellian prince image, that is usually attached to his name with its awful connotations are always looming in the back of people’s imagination, and it’s almost impossible not to carry these preconceived notions to his historical figure when writing about him I imagine, not that she tried lool, she didn’t. She seemed to have already made her judgment about Lucrezia, Rodrigo and Cesare even before she studied all the material about their lives. Her mission was to rescue Lucrezia from her horrible reputation at all costs, and put her on a pedestal, while dragging the Borgia men and anyone else she didn’t liked, and well, she did succeeded at that, at least to a general audience and some academics.

#cesare borgia #maria bellonci #house borgia in history #borgia thoughts #so here's 9 pages of thoughts about cesare absolutely no one asked for djsdjsdjsjdsjds #but i guess that's what tumblr is for right?!#it was fun writing it #i promised i will do bellonci's lucrezia next #<33

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