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#this is creating a fucking huge organ and then going inside yourself to dissect your innards and know your -
blackvahana · 2 months
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Last post lmfao. I'm learning shit about myself tonight
I already talk about how Grey is terrifying to people, how he's progress and science even when it's fucked up, how he'll absolutely experiment on himself including surgery and shit, and how he's in my mind like the father of humanity's persistence hunting in that he will pursue you or any goal he has in mind and you can run and scream and run and run but he will always catch you in the end
The fucking. Image of him in the crystalline halls - obviously translated to human memory because I'm seeing him in vaguely human shape in a literal crystal..... It's not even surprising me. It's not even odd. It's not even a long forgotten memory of a past self I'm like "woah I was like that??" about. that's what I'm learning about myself lmfao
#He's toned it - no he hasn't toned it down in recent years lmfao I think he's just been bored af#But anyway. Yeah over the past few days I've been realising my ''weapons??????? Throw them at me right now'' has been his energy#À) because of the maddened hunger of it. B) because he is an embodiment and manifestation of... goring and breaking apart and death#and whatnot he's like Make Me Whole By Releasing My True Form. and C) heeheehoohoo#you cannot kill us in a way that matters. But anyway. I'm. Ah. Yeah. The... self subsides. And it really is self. It's not Grey#I was holding myself in this grasp I. ugh. OK now I'm eeby. Byeee#ramblings //#S: grey //#But anyway. Yeah. Just. shove yourself in the SL. For. extended period of time. Because how else will you answer what's possible#and what it's flaws are and. It's literally like inventing an AI encyclopedia and then. strapping yourself into it#in VR for a thousand years to ask it what the body of God looks like#And that's a joke but it's a joke in the way that even that doesn't summarise it because an AI is still external to you#this is creating a fucking huge organ and then going inside yourself to dissect your innards and know your -#Oh my god. He who takes the names of God.#Right. The whole thing that we exist in the Brain of God. The ALL Is Mental. Make a brain#Put yourself in it to find god.#That was just one aspect of it and it was a very mathematical aspect in the way it was like one aspect of other maths equations being#done. The shapes of the angles of the Laws make. But that was really not the point. I think at this point we were confident in#knowledge of God or at least the ability to dissect it outside the SL. this was much more about the.... about....#I just don't feel like getting it over now. I'm eeby.#Sky Library //#Memories //
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