#this is against my will and better judgement

[sisyphean-tragedian]

A Walk in the Forest

[got bored over thanksgiving. so instead of hanging out with my family i wrote fanfiction. Living la Vida Loca] [thanks to my Best Friend @jangles28 for being there while i wrote. Mwah.] [tw: smoking, non-consensual kiss, mentioned dead family member]

--

The detective had gone back to his mother-in-law’s house for the holidays. Only for about a week, just to make sure Junior wasn’t completely bereft of any company save the detective’s (and visits from Waldo? Maybe? God, they’d have to up the security again). 

It was hard, though. Even after years had passed, there were still the looks of sorrow and pity, and there was an extra chair left dusty in the closet. Junior seemed to be meshing well with the relations. It would be good for them to hear stories about their mother, stories still too painful for the detective to tell.

Having settled Junior down in front of their grandmother for a few of said stories, the detective flashed her a pained smile and announced that they’d be slipping out for a quick walk.

“Alright, hon, just be careful, would you? And don’t forget to bundle up, it’s getting cold.”

The detective’s mother-in-law chimed in with her ever-helpful advice, and Junior looked up at them with a smile and a wave. The detective smiled back, less pained this time, and told Junior to be good while they were gone.

They walked toward the coat closet, and pulled out their trench coat and other appropriate cold-weather gear. Properly “bundled up”, as their mother-in-law had put it, they exited the house with one final wave. 

Their mother-in-law’s residence was smack in the middle of a forest, so it was perfect to wander around and think in. Not that they had much to think about, at the moment. It was more an excuse to get away from the crush of pitying family members and reminiscences about their unfortunately late wife. The sentiment was nice and all, but it just made the detective feel worse after a while.

They started down a relatively little-traveled path in the woods. It really was beautiful, with oak and aspen and pine all around, and snow beginning to fall in large white flakes. They knew that the precipitation would drive then back inside sooner rather than later, but all they needed was a few minutes to clear their head.

Reaching into the pocket of their trench coat, they pulled out their packet of cigarettes and their lighter. After a bit of fumbling, they managed to get a cigarette lit and in their mouth. They took a drag, and exhaled a long draught of smoke. It warmed them nicely.

After a few minutes of simply smoking and wandering through the woods, the detective declared themselves sufficiently not-morose enough to go back and engage more with their relations. They turned around and began to head back to the house.

Only… 

They couldn’t find the path.

They tried to retrace their steps, follow the sun, a trail of ashes, notable strange-looking trees, anything that might help them find their way back to the house, but they had no luck.

Keeping a cool head, they continued to scour the landscape for any hints of the path back to their mother-in-law’s abode. Nada.

Then, off in the distance, against the autumnal backdrop of oranges, browns, and swirls of white, they spotted him.

He was leaning against a tree, smiling his insufferable smile, in his stupid striped sweater.

Still a little off-balance due to the constant reminders of their dead wife, the detective charged. Against their better judgement, of course, seeing as they had no weapons except their cigarette lighter, and no real means of subduing Waldo in case they did manage to get him down.

Just as they had reached tackling distance, Waldo stuck out his cane, and the detective ran bodily into it. Winded, they fell back against a nearby tree, and clutched at their chest while trying to regain their breath.

Waldo looked down at them, still with that ever-present smile.

“You look a little lost, dear detective. I saw you walking earlier, and I simply couldn’t resist taking the chance to say hello to an old friend.”

The detective, still slightly winded, snarled at Waldo. Much to their chagrin, this only made Waldo’s smile widen.

“I can help you back to your beloved family, detective, but it’ll come at a price to you. What do you say to a walk with me?”

Having recovered from both their earlier fit of rage and running into Waldo’s cane full-force, the detective took a look at him, weighed their options, then promptly turned around and walked away. From previous experience, they knew that they could unfortunately not out-grapple Waldo (who knew something that looked like mere skin and bones could be that strong?), and they didn’t think they could put up with the needling that he was sure to put them through.

So, they walked away. Picking their battles and all. They continued through the forest, searching for the path. They could hear Waldo behind them, in the crunching leaves and the soft giggles that came every now and again.

Eventually, they stopped walking. The sun had begun to set, casting long shadows across the forest floor. They had yet to find the path, and the relentless giggling was getting on their nerves. Suddenly, they felt someone much closer behind them than previously anticipated.

“Are you sure you don’t want my assistance, detective? It won’t cost you much, I promise. And I’m sure your baby is worried for you…”

Jumping away from Waldo, the detective turned to face him once again. At the reminder of their child, they caved a little. They had been searching for at least forty five minutes, and they had yet to find the trail that should have taken them ten minutes at the most. Briefly, they debated the merits of getting into a scuffle with Waldo. Based on empirical evidence, that would leave them bruised, frustrated, and Waldo-less, and they really did need to get back to Junior.

“Fine. No funny business, though. I don’t want to deal with any of your tricks,” acquiesced the detective with a sigh.

“Me? Tricks? I wouldn’t dream of such a thing, detective. Tricks are beneath me. Now, come along!” While speaking, Waldo looped an arm over the detective’s shoulder, much to their chagrin, and started walking in what seemed like no particular direction.

Waldo whistled as he walked, the detective noted. It was all too cheery a tune for a murderer, but they weren’t about to tell him to switch it up. They had to practically take two steps to every one of Waldo’s and they suspected that he might’ve been enjoying that, if the new lilt to his smile was any indication.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, they came within sight of the house. The walk was stunningly hijinks-free, but the detective knew that out of sight didn’t mean out of mind for Waldo. They tried to duck out of his grip, but all of a sudden, his hand turned to steel on their shoulder.

“Not so fast, dear detective. I said there’d be a price, and I’m a man of my word,” Waldo said.

As the detective inhaled to ask what Waldo wanted from them, they were abruptly lifted, and pressed against a nearby tree. Indignantly, they tried to flail out of Waldo’s grasp, but he kept them firmly in the air.

When they tried to start protesting this treatment; however, there came something that they didn’t expect. 

Waldo leaned in, and pressed a kiss to their lips. The detective, jarred, jerked back, but unfortunately hit their head against the tree. Waldo chuckled, then dropped them unceremoniously to the ground. 

“Do remember your spacial awareness, detective. Anyhow, I’m sure your child misses you sorely. It has been fun, mouse, we should do this more often. Happy holidays!” 

And with that, he was gone. The detective, indignant, picked themself up off the ground, and brushed all the leaf debris off. Maybe they had time for one more smoke before they went in, just to steady their nerves? 

They reached in their pocket, and found a signature red envelope in place of their cigarettes. When had Waldo even found the time to do that? Inside, they found a rather condescending note regarding their smoking habit. With a frustrated growl, they stormed the rest of the way back to their mother-in-law’s house, and hugged a teary-eyed Junior upon their arrival.

The detective reassured everyone that they were alright, they had just lost track of time in the woods, no need to worry, but their words rang hollow even to themself. That night, once again, they sat beside an empty spot at the dinner table, and stared out towards the patch of woods where they had last seen Waldo. The snow that had since fallen covered any trace that might have remained from the afternoon’s happenings.

[theemporium]

hiiiii cece… for a stocking stuffer i would like to perhaps request building gingerbread houses with Oscar (:

thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

.

“This feels mathematical.” 

“It’s supposed to be fun.” 

“Then why do you have a ruler?” 

“Because I need to make sure the edges are straight.” 

“Right,” Oscar said, sounding the least bit convinced as he watched you fuss over the massive gingerbread slabs. “Because that is a very normal thing to do for a fun activity.” 

“You’re sounding awfully judgemental for someone who said they had never built a gingerbread house before,” you murmured, a crease forming between your brows that he had the strongest urge to smooth his thumb over. 

“I didn’t realise I needed a degree for it,” Oscar deadpanned, but his lips twitched upwards when your head snapped up to glare at him. “Ouch, tough crowd.” 

“I hope your gingerbread collapses,” you grumbled with a small huff, but let yourself be pulled towards his side as he wound an arm around your shoulders.

“You don’t mean that,” Oscar murmured, his lips brushing against your temple before he pressed a placating kiss to the side of your head. “You would be upset if my gingerbread family had no home.” 

“It would be their fault for leaving their house in the hands of a builder who mocks a ruler,” you retorted, your lips twitching when Oscar let out a laugh. 

“No, you would help me,” he said confidently. 

And he wasn’t wrong. You would help him. To be completely honest, you went into this with the expectation that you would have to help salvage whatever mess he made whilst he nibbled on the sweets you had off to the side to decorate the houses. 

“Not anymore,” you lied, rolling your eyes when he placed another—and longer—kiss on your cheek this time. “Okay, okay, Piastri, you’re wearing me down.” 

Oscar grinned. “I’ll give you half my jelly tots for your help.” 

“Just some jelly tots?” You teased, eyebrows raised as Oscar reached for one of the tubes of icing. 

“You got some other demands, baby?” Oscar asked, his eyes dropping to your lips for a short moment.

“I think…” You paused, leaning a little closer. Just enough to hear Oscar’s breath hitch a little. “You can do better than that.” 

His eyes widened as you pulled away suddenly, taking the icing with you. “Woah—hey!” 

“Thought you were meant to be fast,” you taunted, giggling when he lightly poked at your side. “You snooze, you lose, baby.” 

“I see how it is,” Oscar mused, reaching for your ruler before you could grab it back. “You’re on, baby, you’re on.” 

You snorted. “Hm, sexy and competitive. Just how I like my gingerbread building contests.”

“Laugh all you want but I am taking my jolly tots back.” 

“Hey, we had a deal!” 

“You snooze, you lose, baby!”

.

[kindred-spirit-93]

akrasia - ἀκρασία

(n. philosophy) the state of mind in which someone acts against their better judgement through weakness of will.

no im not procrastinating i have merely succumbed to my human flaw of imperfection. heres an achilles lol. might colour him in later

going through it. and by it i mean downloading references i will be to stubborn to use lmao. achilles & neomachus art in this lifetime trust.

>:D

[dandelions-could-never]

Having dsmp hyperfixation in the year 2024 is like walking into a room that’s actively on fire and complimenting the wallpaper.

[assiraphales]

I remember there was this one episode of doctor who where some malevolent aliens experimented on a pig to make it look like an extraterrestrial (walked on two legs, wore a space suit) & it freaked out & began to run. a man shot it just before nine could stop him, and nine yelled “why would you do that! it was SCARED!” before cradling it’s head and gently caressing it’s snout while it took its final breaths. and I think that, at the heart, is who nine was. he was witty and sarcastic and mean and jaded but he cared. he cared so much about everything, and everyone, no matter how insignificant and fleeting they could have seemed in comparison to an entity like him.

[yomipurge]

SEEK A WAY OUT

will be avaliable on my etsy later today!

[solasaich]

gawwlllll…

[datshitrandom]

Darren Criss attends the 2024 CFDA Awards at American Museum of Natural History | October 28, 2024 | 🎥 📸 Cristian Siriano, Kristina Bumphrey

[fluo-skeletons]

lukewarm ass take but papyrus can be both funny and have secrets, everyone agrees that his brother has both going on, so why not papyrus?

[yamina-chan]

August 21st, 2023

"I'm sure this joke has been done many times before, but as of making this, I've not come across any other drawings about it." - Since then, I've found one other comic page about it and it made my day. =D I probably reblogged it too, but since I never got into the habit of using tags for that purpose I can't find it right now. xD EDIT: Found it! This is the other comic that made the same joke that I came across some time after making this. :D https://www.tumblr.com/franeridart/730792686216511488/he-made-a-discovery

[reverentwormpriest]

[ind1c0lite]

something about desperately wanting to trust

[evilvampire]

Ascended Astarion being too much and Tav just giving him a handheld mirror, immediately distracting and calming him down. Like an iPad baby.

[hazyla]

I did it I made laios into a grumpus because I think he should play bugsnax

[the-architect-of-ferrari]

hey guys! I was formerly fellow-meme-lover but I have retired that name after like 7 years. I am now @the-architect-of-ferrari in honor of that one article about Carlos (pictured). I’m a little surprised no one had taken that username yet but I’ll gladly have it.

I decided to change my name because I want it to reflect the main focus of my blog moving forward: Carlos Sainz. This is also going to be a bit of a goodbye to Ferrari post and clarifying what my blog will look like after AD24. So continue reading after the cut if you’re interested.

I am a fairly recent f1 fan, I only started casually watching late into the 2023 season, and it wasn’t until the winter break that I started getting serious about f1 and more involved.

It was during this time that I discovered Charlos, and they were my absolute favorite duo on the entire grid. I remember thinking the entire Ferrari team was a giant mess, and that the only thing they had going for them was their driver pairing. I spent the off-season watching old interviews with them, seeing posts about them on tumblr and twitter, and learning everything about them that I could. I initially liked Charles more, as he was the first driver I really learned about, and I will always be fond of him for gifting me this sport and fandom that means so much to me.

Over time though, I naturally gravitated more towards Carlos. I couldn’t explain it but there was something about him that connected me to him, and soon his happiness was my happiness and his sadness was my sadness. When the news of Lewis’s move to Ferrari dropped on February 1st, I was devastated. I could only think of how Ferrari was Carlos’s dream and it was now coming to an end. All season I’ve been dreading having to make this post, having to say goodbye, but I can’t put it off forever. I truly believe that the team hasn’t done right by Carlos in a lot of ways, but it was his dream, and I want him to be happy more than anything else, and for his sake I sincerely hope that a return to Ferrari is possible one day. I think he will be happy to know that regardless of what the future holds, he will always be a part of the team’s history, and everything he gave to them will not be forgotten.

As for Charlos as a duo, they were always the duo I loved the most of the entire grid. It wasn’t always easy at times, with their occasional fights, with the frequent fan wars, and the accusations of it being a PR friendship. But I think if you went back and watched old videos of them together, you can see the fondness in their eyes clear as day, and it lingers in their familiarity with each other to this day. Four years as teammates isn’t nothing. I don’t know that anyone will be able to make me laugh as hard as they did, or cheer me up on a bad day the way they did. In the future, even if they’re not teammates I will still try to post about them as much as possible, even if it’s a 3 second clip of them chatting at a driver’s parade or something idc.

But with that said, my no.1 driver from now on will always be Carlos, and so what I post will reflect that. As a Charlos fan, I was reluctantly a Ferrari fan because that is the team they drove for, but now I will be with Carlos 100%. I will no longer be solely posting about charles and carlos, and instead will post things more like what i have been posting lately, which will include other driver pairings like versainz. I’ll also just post general f1 stuff sometimes if i think i have something important to say. But mostly i will be talking about Carlos.

For now though, let’s make the rest of this season count. I’ll be with you always, Carlos.

¡Vamos, toro!