#this is absolutely about the piss jello

[theemporium]

violet fluff, luke! “this is my girlfriend everyone!” and “i think my family/friends really liked you. maybe more than they liked me.” 😋😋

thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

55. “This is my girlfriend everyone!”

.

“Luke—” 

“I need to tell everyone!”

“Please, get down from there.” 

“M’not high enough!” 

“You’re drunk!” 

“Am not!” 

You let out a heavy sigh, stuck between wanting to look away from the train wreck in front of you and terrified that if you even blinked, something bad would happen to the boy. Because, unfortunately for you, drunk Luke Hughes was a bit of an adventurer when he was the right level of drunk and his current goal was trying to climb onto the makeshift bar. 

It had been one last party to close off the season before everyone headed their own ways for the off season. They were ending the season far earlier than they would have liked, but Nico was determined to have a happy send off before everyone ran off to hide away and lick their wounds over the summer. He wanted them to have one last moment as the team they were before it inevitably changed next season. 

It was supposed to be chill until Jack and Dawson started handing out their homemade jello shots—and then everything went to shit. 

And somewhere along five tester jello shots and a handful of some crazy strong Czech beer that Palat had brought with him, Luke was far too gone to really understand or care about logic or reasoning—like climbing a makeshift bar half-naked was not the way to go. 

“Help me,” you pleaded with the older Hughes but Jack only cackled, shaking his head and already reaching for his phone. 

“Absolutely fucking not,” he grinned. 

You glared at the boy before turning to your boyfriend atop of the bar, attempting your best puppy dog eyes. “Luke, baby, please get down before you hurt yourself.” 

But Luke stubbornly shook his head. “I need to tell everyone something very important.” 

“Curtis is never letting him live this down,” Jack murmured with a snort.

Luke cleared his throat until all eyes were on him. 

“Oh god,” you heard Nico mutter from somewhere behind you.

“This is my girlfriend everyone!” Luke announced as he pointed towards you with a sappy grin on his face. “And I love her very much and I want to marry her. Right now.” 

“You aren’t in Vegas, buddy,” John called out to him.

Luke paused before he spoke again. “I am booking tickets to Vegas right now to marry my pretty girlfriend!” 

“Oh my god,” you mumbled, stuck somewhere between a laugh and a groan as you felt your whole face heat up.

“Mom is gonna be so pissed this is how he proposed,” Jack commented, turning the camera to you and giggling when you tried to smack it out of his hands.

“He’s not serious,” you said, though that didn’t help the fact your face was still burning up.

“I am so serious!” Luke called out.

“Yeah, well, get down and then we will see because I am not interested in a fiancé with broken limbs,” you retorted, letting out a sigh of relief as he began to climb down from the bar. 

“So, Vegas?”

“Shut up, Jack.” 

“There goes my offer to be your maid of honour.”

.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

I have a question

At the Windsor walkabout or whatever it’s called, back when the Queen died, where the four of them went to greet the crowds & see the flowers left… was Meghan high or drunk?

There’s a bit on video where she’s literally walking as if her legs are jello and staggering, and it’s not how she usually walks like in heels either, and she seemed manic talking to the crowd and her rude attitude towards them & the staffers

I noticed also that she seems to have not been actually invited and appeared last minute to the car… which is even weirder as why would the BBC, of all broadcasters, miss out her name but include the names of William, Catherine & Harry? Very odd if you ask me…

Then also when Catherine stood her ground and showed her spine of steel titanium towards the woman who drags her name, her marriage & children through the mud, that Meghan actually looked like she was about to burst into tears or pee herself in fright as she looked absolutely terrified of Catherine!

So yeah I feel that she had been drinking or something and that William & Catherine told her to basically stay away and the BBC were told it was only themselves & Harry coming out, as I think Harry didn’t want Meghan there either (another opinion for another day is the state of that marriage���) as I think if she was drunk when his grandmother had just died, that hopefully some part of Harry was angered by that?

There are a couple of rumors that William and Kate had to delay the walkabout after The Queen’s death because either both of the Sussexes or just Meghan were drunk when KP called to arrange it and they/she needed to sober up before they went out and the delay is why Kate was so pissed.

[b4mb1isntr34l]

What about Stu/Sid headcanons? Anything at all.

Stu and Sid General Headcannons (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧

Stu :

he seems like he would severly enjoy skipping. like you would catch this man skipping joyfully and whimsically too many times

probably ate crayons as a kid

argued that the different colours had different flavours

has the most devious sweet tooth ever, im talking would start eating pinches of sugar if he wanted something sweet bad enough

would start pulling faces at you behind your face for shits and giggles

putting up the finger the second you turned around if you pissed him off

lactose intolerant

doesnt admit hes lactose intolerant

would genuinely really enjoy bands/artists that billy would call "corny". Backstreet Boys, Spice Girls, Brittany Spears, ect.

always keeps a lighter or mini matchbox on him

he doesnt smoke often, usually only a pull of someone else's if he's had a few drinks. he just likes having them on him

would put water in his hands, pretend to sneeze and flick the water on you.

sleeps with his mouth open

Tatum tells him his mouth stays shut while he sleeps because he doesnt want spiders in his mouth

"there's no spiders in here anyways,"

Tatum assured him, scratching his head as she did so.

"there might be - they're everywhere."

snores.

Sid :

sid is a huge sweetheart as we all know

would let anyone sleep over any time, or sleep over with someone if they needed

was an absolute master at jump rope when she was a kid. could do tricks, multiple jump ropes, probably could do it upside down

knew Stu when they were kids. Stu offered her his cherry flavoured crayon. was scared to eat it. she still has it lying around somewhere

can drive, but its scared to do so (probably cus she almost got murdered 😛)

really likes marshmallows and would eat them with anything that wouldnt be too gross.

a huge Alice In Chains fan

would be absolutely devious for the Sims 4. you would not be able to get her off that game

"no- dumbass," she grumbled while prsctically slamming her mouse into the desk, Tatum on her bed watching.

"its not supposed to- stupid fuckung game! i hate this!"

would square up with her computer if it lagged, glitched, didnt save ect.

would really love jelly/jello. cherry flavoured jelly packets can be always found in her cupboards.

Tatum and Billy's house's are like second homes for her and vise versa.

thank you for reading and for the request :D i hope this wasnt dog dookie and you enjoyed 🖤

[vibratingskull]

Love the rut theme! Could u possibly write about Thrawn trying to get through his shift without pouncing on fem reader during his rut. Maybe the crew and reader just think he's under the weather. But once him and reader are alone together at the end of the shift, all is revealed 😜

Rut is my trademark with the breeding kink so... Let's fucking go!

ThrawnxF!reader

Tags : Rut, breeding, fingering, P in V, creampie

You remain straight and silent, just glancing from time to time to Karyn. She glances back at you, as nervous as you are. You nod to each other, with stiff shoulders and eyes wide open you take a sneaky look at Thrawn, seated on his command chair.

Imperial.

Haughty.

Deadly cold…

In fact the whole bridge is tense and stressed. The usual respectful and focused silence is replaced by a fearful and eerie silence, only interrupted by the sound of keys and bips of computers. Nobody dares utter a word and walk with the head low to not, under any circumstances, cross eyes with the crimson gaze of the Chiss. 

Absolutely everyone is terrified.

Something about Thrawn is… odd, today. Something emanating from him, bitter and dark, poisonous and toxic. He remains as calm and stern as usual, never raising his voice and remaining polite to everyone even if they are lower in the hierarchy.

But something reeks of danger around him. 

His aura is so dense you could choke inhaling it. The atmosphere is terrible on this bridge and absolutely everybody can feel it.

Karyn nonchalantly takes one step to the side to join you.

“What is wrong with the Grand Admiral?” She whispers, tense.

“I have no idea.” You shake your head, “I was not at his side this morning…”

Your different agendas keep you separate from one another. Tonight you only could sleep 3 hours together before you had to wake up and take your shift. As usual he held you tight and you held him back, he was deliciously warm and his embrace infinitely soft, even if it might have been tighter than usual… You actually had some difficulties breathing with how squeezed you were. And you had a hard time escaping his grasp, even deeply sleeping he held down to you, keeping you pressed against his large chest.

“You really have no idea?” She insists, “Because he screams of menaces right now, he clearly is pissed off!”

“Yeah, I know!” You grumble, “But I have no idea. I didn’t even know he could get pissed off-”

“Who could get mad?” 

You both jump out of your skins at the sudden deep melodious voice rising right behind you. You spin towards Thrawn, your nerves in a wrack. He remains still, the back straight with his hands clasped behind his back, eyes focused and incredibly sharp. In some way he managed to teleport from his command chair to behind you without making a single sound.

You gulp.

“Nobody, Grand Admir al.” You mumble.

He looks straight into your eyes with an indecipherable expression, making your legs like jello. He is as stern and inexpressive as usual, but something in his eyes makes you tremble and teases your survival instinct.

“Keep focus on the mission, limit the unnecessary discussions.” He finally let out after staring at you for an uncomfortable moment.

“Sir, yes Sir!” You both respond.

“Captain (F/n), follow me.” He orders almost nonchalantly.

Obedient, you follow your Grand Admiral in the long corridors of the Chimaera, wary of what he has in mind. You raise your gaze to observe the back of his head, his shiny blue-black hair slicked back perfectly, his thick neck on his large shoulders.

He is so tall…

You notice this is neither the way to his office or any Command room.

“Hum…” You start, unsure “Grand Admiral…? Thrawn? Where are we going?”

“Please follow me.” He simply responds, unbothered but still emitting that murderous aura.

Are you in trouble?

“Is everything alright?” You insist.

He stops and turns back to you, pressing a button to open a door.

“Please, enter.”

You look at the room.

This isn’t a room, but a broom closet, small and dark.

“That's a closet.” You tell him, like he didn’t realize it already.

He slowly, oh so slowly inhales, eyes fixed on you, devouring you with his burning crimson orbs, his nostrils flaring.

The message is clear : enter.the.fucking.closet.NOW!

You shudder and stand to attention by pure reflex before entering the closet hurriedly. Why does he want you inside a closet?

You feel his imposing presence right behind you, his massive body making the closet even more claustrophobic. You feel him pressing himself against your back, his hands snaking their way on your body.

“Finally…” He lets out a growl.

The door closes back on you with a shush and he immediately passes his hands under your jacket and shirt to grope your tits in his large palms.

“Thrawn! What the-”

“Shhhhhhh. It is alright, Ch’acah.” He cuts you, “Let me have my fun, enjoy yourself.” He peppers kisses all the way on your neck before licking it from shoulder to jaw. He kneads your breast while pushing you against the wall, pressing himself in your back.

“Goddammit, Thrawn!” You spit, “Would you at least explain yourself?” You try to say under all of those caress

He breathes deeply, like he was deeply impatient and… needy. You gulp as you feel the hard wall of muscle that is his body against your softer one, he is so tall and large, shielding you from absolutely anything and everything. Your cheek and body are pressed against the cold metal wall while he massages your breast thoroughly. He dives his nose in the crook of your neck and inhales your scent deeply with a satisfied sigh.

“I need it, Ch’acah.” He breathes, “It is irrepressible. I cannot help it…”

“But… What are you talking about, blast?!”

“I am in rut, Cheo Vir.” He sucks the sensitive skin of your neck, working to leave love bites, “I need you… Terribly.” 

Rut?

He never spoke of that before, you never knew he had such mating cycles!

What the fuck, why nobody speaks on that damn ship?!

“I can make it really quick, do not worry.” He continues, his hand traveling south, “I will not take too much of your time, but I need some relief urgently.” He explains.

His hand reaches your pants and pushes past it to scoop your sex over the fabric of your panties, making you yelp at the warm sensation.

You gulp as his fingers hook your panties to slide it to the side and trail your slit. You stifle a moan, but nothing escapes him.

“Hmm. You are already wet.” He notes, satisfied, “This situation seems to excite you quite well.”

“Shut up!”

You squirm and protest but deep down this utterly baffling situation is really exciting, locked in a closet with your fiance, your superior no less, to do unspeakable things!

Utterly depraved.

And madly exciting…

He chuckles darkly and kisses your cheek.

He trails up and down your folds, probing your entrance before entering you with a finger. You feel yourself tensing up at the intrusion, but your body welcomes him easily. You yelp uncontrollably as he hooks his finger inside, knuckles deep he caresses and scratches at your Gummy spot expertly, biting your neck. You let out a strain of strangled moans, trembling in his arms as he starts purring, a low, animalistic sound vibrating in his throat and chest. After giving sweet attention to your G spot, you feel yourself getting wetter and wetter by the second, so much he can push a second finger inside and stretch you wide and good.

He scissors and fingers you thoroughly with a dexterous hand, you feel your wetness soaking your pants. He hums approvingly.

“You will soon be ready at this rate.” He praises, “I always appreciated your… eagerness on the subject.”

You hiss in response, embarrassed. Was it your fault if he had such an effect on you? That he could command your entire body with a single finger? Melt into a puddle of nerves with a single command?

He fingers you nastily and hard as you try desperately to remain calm and contained, refraining from moaning too loud to not be heard, something he seems to take offense to.

He accelerates his ministrations, teasing your clit at the same time to make you melt. You tremble in his hands, legs like jello you’re actually convinced you’re about to fall.

But Thrawn holds you firmly, an arm around your waist, fingers dug in your flesh to keep you standing on your feet while his other hand is driving you absolutely crazy. You bite down your lower lips to not let escape any sounds, to his discontent.

“Will you not sing for me, sweet thing?” He asks, nibbling your ear. “Will you not scream my name?”

You feel how soaked your pants are, completely drenched in your essence, spoiling the fabric.

“So-someone could… hear us…” You manage to say between pants and gasps.

He very obviously accelerates his caress when you open your mouth, trying to have you moan loudly for everyone to hear.

“Good.” He breathes, “Let them all know.”

As a sentence he pushes another finger inside you to caress every nook and cranny of your pussy, no secret spots are left untouched, rigorously teased and caressed while he flicks your clit expertly like he knows you love.

Because he knows your taste so well.

He made it a point of honor to learn what made you scream desperately in bed and have no qualms torturing you with his knowledge, making you come again and again…

You feel all your blood rushing to your cunt, puffing up your fluffy walls of tender sensitive flesh until your pussy convulses around his fingers, clenching furiously at your orgasm suddenly, like you were struck by lightning.

You keep your mouth shut so hard it is painful as a long moan rumbles in your throat, only for his ears.

He tuts.

“Oh no, sweet thing. That is not what I want.”

He gives a last flick at your clit and slides his fingers out, to your relief.

Your relief is short-lived as he opens your pants and slides them down to your knees with your panties, leaving you bare cunny exposed to his crimson gaze. He kneels down to kiss it tenderly, give it some licks, tasting your wetness while purring. You mewl again, the remnant of your orgasm still rolling under the touch of his lips.

He kisses it loudly one last time and stands back up. You shudder, hearing the sound of a belt. He grips your hips and pulls them towards him until you can feel his hard, warm, long and girthy erection against your bare butt.

“You will give me what I crave, Ch’acah.” He lets you know.

That is not a proposition, not even an order.

That is a certainty.

He wants you screaming his name desperately. 

You may have not noticed, but he did.

How some of your male colleagues look at you…

But that is his fault, he wanted your relationship to remain private.

He should have known that someone as precious as you would make heads spin all around!

Time to correct this mistake and let all those men know you are taken by your Grand Admiral.

He brushes his girth against your soaked folds gently, coating it nice and well before pushing it inside in one go. Your breath is cut at the sudden invasion. You are completely stuffed, filled like a decadent cream puff.

Usually you see a noticeable bulge when he enters you, he is just so tall and large after all…

He does nice circle motions with his hips to get some frictions while letting you adjust to his massive side. 

You take a deep breath, trying to welcome him fully in your tight little pussy. But that is always such a challenge! He is just too massive!

“Relax, cheo Ch’acah. I do not want it to hurt.” He says almost mockingly.

You greet your teeth, feeling your inner muscles slowly loosen around his cock. You pant as he sits fully inside, weighting on your lower stomach. You breathe through your nose, trying to accommodate him.

“You squeeze me so well, sweet thing.” He lets out in a hiss, “Your little cunt is the perfect fit for my cock, like you were made for me.”

You feel his thumbs caressing your hips as you slowly relax. 

But you can feel his impatience bubbling under his skin, he wants to pound you right now!

But he is merciful enough to let you adjust to him.

When he feels you are ready he gives you one single shallow thrust before starting to fuck you hard. He goes all in with powerful, devastating thrusts leaving you utterly breathless. This time you cannot refrain from moaning and mewling, the obscene sounds escape your mouth inadvertently as he rams into you mercilessly. He hits your cervix easily with his length, the pain melting in the pleasure you’re feeling. You whine out loud under such assaults on your sensitive flesh, only hearing his purring in response. He hits and brushes every single intimate spot with such ease it is almost ridiculous, but it gives you so much pleasure in return, you feel your legs threatening to give way under you at any moment with such shockwaves spreading in your limbs. But Thrawn holds you firmly, not hesitating to press himself back against you, compressing you against the wall for support.

He manages to slide his hand between the hard wall and your body to resume playing with your pearl to maximize your pleasure. Your hips jolt away at the touch, it is just too much for you, but he weighs on you to maintain you still and force you to endure the pleasure he is giving you.

You will take everything he offers.

He chuckles in his mind, him who took you tenderly all those times, making sweet love to you…

Today he wants to fuck!

He flicks and rolls your little clit in his skilled fingers, making you cream all around his girthy shaft. His other hand doesn’t need to hold you anymore and comes intertwining your fingers with your hand on the wall. While he bullies himself inside of you he kisses your neck, cheek and temples delicately, like butterflies on your skin.

Such a contrast with the raw strength he uses to fuck you…

He peppers kisses here and there, purring in your ear, whispering sweet nothing, enticing you to be good for him, to take him whole.

And mostly to take his load inside of you.

Because he has one very precise objective today.

To breed you.

To fuck you until you get round with his child.

That’s what a rut is for.

He took rut suppressants during all those years, but he waited long enough. He wants a child, several even, a legacy in this tortuous universe, a last gift to the Ascendancy if he ever failed his duties towards the Chiss.

And it would send all those idiots men dancing around you a clear message!

You will be such a perfect mother for his children, you gave him so much joy and stability in this hostile Empire. You guided him when he was in the dark and doubtful, you will simply be the most amazing mother if you bestow the same kind of patience to his children!

He has no doubt about it.

You will mother his descendants. You and nobody else!

It was more than due time that he fucked you properly, that he makes you his for all eternity.

He wants your legacies to be tied by blood and flesh, to intertwine your fates inextricably for good this time.

He is no monster, he knows you want children. He questioned you on your life goals beforehand and knows well that you desire a family for yourself.

Family that he is more than happy to provide!

He will give you so many children… So many little ones with blue skin and red eyes, but they will have your hair and features.

He just knows it.

They will be the most beautiful beings the universe ever saw, because they will be yours.

He is pondering all those thoughts and desires when he starts feeling your little pussy clenching around his shaft, a sign of your fast approaching orgasm. So he accelerates his thrusts to keep up with you.

You are giving him so much pleasure already, but he wants you both to orgasm at the same time, reaching your highs together.

Like a single being…

This is so intimate for him.

And your desperate moans and uncontrollable mewls are just so sexy and alluring, teasing his rutting instincts even more. 

On your end you can’t do anything more than take it like a fuckdoll, on your tiptoes to match his height, you feel your drool rolling on your cheeks and jaw with how dazed you are. Your nerves ending are on fire to be teased so much.

Someone definitively heard you getting fucked in this little broom closet, that is a certainty.

He doesn’t neglect your clit, giving it even more attention. He wants the experience to be pleasurable for you, it will entice you to come back for even more.

“Ha!... Thrawn!” You gasp, on the verge of orgasm.

“I know my love. Come for me, make a mess on my cock, cheo vir.” He encourages.

And with a final deep thrust he pushes you beyond the arcanas of pleasure and a tsunami of pleasure comes to ravage everything, drowning you in such powerful sensations you scream his name.

He finishes with you as he hoped, his cock twitching nervously inside your warm wet cavern, spurting his potent seed inside your glorious womb. He feels your little cunny milking him dry greedily, your own body craving his cum.

He remains pressed tight against you, panting as he slowly goes down from his high, his hand still holding down firmly on yours. 

His purring never stopped.

His hand that caressed your clit snakes its way higher to caress the place of your womb tenderly, lovingly, reverently. He kisses your cheek, sliding out of your tight cunny with a hiss.

He loves how squeezed he feels inside of you, and slipping out is unbearable!

You gasp at the sudden emptiness inside of you, already feeling your slick and his semen rolling down your thighs.

“Tssss.” He chastises, “You are already wasting it. But I came prepared.”

You then feel something soft but really cold being pushed inside your pussy, sealing it off completely.

“I defend you from taking it out.” He orders, “I will do it myself tonight.”

He will only take it out to fuck another load inside you, obviously. You are still two different species, you will need numerous tries to finally get pregnant.

But that is okay.

His rut can last a pretty long time, and he will take the utmost pleasure in taking care of you all night long until you end up pregnant.

You pant and stagger backward, but Thrawn is here to catch you in his warm embrace.

“Careful Ch’acah.” He says lovingly, “Did I exhaust you?”

“Yes…” You let out, out of breath.

He delicately pushes a strand of hair out of your face, hugging you from behind.

“Take a shower before coming back on the bridge, you are quite a mess Ch’acah.” He lets you know with a satisfied tone.

“Who’s fault is that ?” You bite back with your usual sass he loves so much.

“I will take responsibility for this everyday if you wish for it.” He kisses your temple with a chuckle, hugging you tight against his beating, loving heart.

He buries his nose in your hair to breathe in your delicious scent, already feeling the rut coming back…

He will have you all night long to appease his instincts, he just has to modify your agenda.

He is the Grand Admiral after all…

@bluechiss @thrawnalani @justanothersadperson93 @al-astakbar @thrawnspetgoose @readinglistfics @elise2174 @debonaire-princess @twilekchiss @pencil-urchin @ineedazeezee @mssbridgerton @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching @Cortisolcosplay, @obbicrystaleo, @germie2037

[try-set-me-on-fire]

hiii can i ask about doesn’t know they’ve been injured or go through me?

- @buckactuallys

Go through me I might do a hostage situation with Eddie and Maddie? Like they're just getting coffee or something, might not even have gone here together it's just coincidence, and the robbers or whatever are trying to mess with her and Eddie's like you're gonna have to go through me but then they just both end up locked in the back room. Eddie's like well that was stupid. don't tell your brother I did that he'd be pissed at me. I mean I absolutely would step in front of danger for you Maddie but this is like a trolley problem personally designed to ruin Buck's whole life. Let's pretend this never happened. Fuck I never even got my coffee.

Doesn't know they're injured is what this snippet is from! Summary for the whole fic under the cut in case you don't want spoilers for whenever I get around to writing the whole thing

Buck and Maddie go to IKEA and Buck is dreamily lost in thought about recently becoming boyfriends with Eddie and is dodging her questions because no one knows they're together yet. On the way back they get run off the road and the car rolls and ends up on its side and Buck has to get her and Jee out safely and quickly because the engine's smoking and could catch fire any minute. They all get out fine (rip to Maddie's new strandmon chair 😔) and are shaken up but mostly cleared when they're transported to the hospital (not by the 118 but the gang comes running when they hear what happened). Buck kind of prioritized Jee and Maddie to the doctors but really he wasn't feeling bad, figured he'd be a little bruised tomorrow. But then when everybody goes to the diner across the street from the hospital for Yay Everyone's Alright dinner Buck's like. Mm. Hmm. Huh. I think something might not be right. Goes down like a sack of bricks, vaguely aware of Eddie all panicked and calling him pet names. I miiiiight swap perspectives for just one scene because I like the image of Buck being rolled off to surgery and Eddie looking lost and saying "but we had a date." Anyway Buck wakes up, turns out he has some minor internal tear somewhere that was getting worse because he was walking around doing stuff instead of laying down and letting doctors check him over. Eddie is there, Buck is sorry he's going to miss their date. Eddie's like...... Wait right here (Buck: literally can't go anywhere) and comes back with kind of wilted flowers, one of those plastic battery operated candles and two cups of red jello. They can have their date right here!

[scaryleo-scaryleo]

me and my partner have been making really dumb adult natalie headcannons and we’ve made a list of the good ones

goes out of her way to buy ring pops

will not eat cereal after she found out fruit loops are all the same flavor

ate pop rocks and got scared

has put a goldfish in her mouth before that scene

buys rainbow goldfish crackers but will not eat the green ones

hates hello kitty because she is 3 apples tall

doesn’t understand monopoly but she still plays it and gets absolutely furious

puts diesel instead of normal gas in her car very often

puts any teeth she finds under her pillow for the tooth fairy and gets pissed when they’re still there in the morning

thinks the mall easter bunny is real and gets so scared that she has to be escorted out of the mall

is not allowed in any aquarium in her state

she is the reason why toys r us closed down

hates pudding

tries to suck jello cups into her mouth and throws them against a wall when she chokes on it

she has 5 minute crafts blocked on literally every platform even though they blocked her first because she sent them death threats and called them mean names

goes all out on halloween to scare kids then steal their candy

when kids knock on her door she chases them

goes to the pool and wears arm floaters and screams at kids while trying not to drown and they splash her

loves boiled peanuts

coughs like an ipad kid

did not grow out of eating her boogers instead she just started doing it for fun in like her late 20s

sent taissa a video of her not voting for her

got rejected from a community college

accidentally posted an embarrassing picture of herself staring into the camera on twitter and now it’s a meme and when people tag her she starts screaming

has been banned from every social media platform like 4 times

does not know what a stanley cup is, one time misty bought her one and she thought that it meant misty made it and she was really confused

loves fireworks but is scared of the ones you throw

throws the popping fireworks at misty’s car and windows every year on the fourth of july one time it hit misty in the forehead and she had a giant welt on her head for weeks and natalie kept pressing it in

tried to eat one of said fireworks

loves the fourth of july like what really hyped about it but literally has no idea what the history of it is

gets caught sneaking into churches and eating all of the communion wafers

thinks the keebler elves are real

still looks for the leprechauns that destroyed her childhood classrooms at the end of rainbows and has gotten lost in a field doing so

gets mad when beets don’t turn her pee red because that’s the only reason she eats them she tries it at least once a month

got lost in a corn maze and she got so mad that she just started eating all of the corn

presses peoples bruises in then gets really offended and mad when they tell her to stop but also gets mad if they don’t react

saw the the spider-man movie and thought it was real so she kept picking up spiders and letting them bite her it got so bad that misty had to take her to the ER

thought jaws was real so she went on a boat and jumped off to kick a shark in the head

bought a grimace shake and got really mad that it didn’t end up like the tiktoks

like to chase her friends around with things she finds

makes tiassa a dirt cake when she won the election out of fucking mud and rocks then felt bad so she made misty make one out of pudding and oreos to give to her

when tiassa first started running she made fake merch out of rocks and sold it outside of tiassa’s house

[allwaswell16]

Hello Anitra, some weeks ago I sent you an ask for a fic rec about HL (1 of them) working at the hospital and the other had an accident and had to go there and you wrkte in tags that you were trying to see if you could do a small fic rec bc there weren’t too much or if not, you’ll add it to your list, but it’s not there and I can’t find the small fic rec because tumblr search works when it wants 🥲🥲🥲 hope I’m not bothering you!

Hiiii! Sorry it's taken a bit to get back to this! Here are some fics that fit what you're looking for! (There were more than I thought!) Happy reading!

-Injured Character/Hospital Staff Fics-

If It Means A Lot To You by themasqueraded (NR, 25k)

20 year old Harry works at one of the best hospitals of London and he's got his whole life figured out. It all works out until a beautiful, injured boy comes along.

i carry your heart in mine by millsx (G, 18k)

It all starts with Harry covering a shift for his colleague. It ends in old wounds, resurfaced feelings and an ex-boyfriend Harry never really got over.

fight me breathless by sideofzemblanity (M, 7k)

Louis Tomlinson has no idea why he’s in a London hospital for asthma, but enter Harry Styles, his doctor, who he definitely doesn’t think is hot, and he’s left wondering if asthma is why he can’t seem to breathe properly with his doctor around.

When You Really Love Christmas by @jaerie (E, 5k)

Harry really loves Christmas. It lands him in the hospital with a Christmas tree stuck up his ass.

Slip into Your Arms by @ohpleaselarry (NR, 4k)

“Am I too old to ask for a cast that isn’t just plain white?”

The nurse laughs easily, shaking her head fondly as she continues to scribble on her little clipboard. Louis sets his free (non-broken) hand under his chin and sighs, peeking at the clock for the fifth time in the last minute. Waiting for doctors sucks. Waiting for doctors to come and fix up your throbbing hand while your head pounds and it’s Christmas- that really sucks.

I Don't Care It's Obvious by RedRidingStiles (M, 4k)

“You mind telling me what happened?” Harry asks.

“Well Lou here thought it would be a great idea to ride his board down the big hill on fifth street, you know the one right? Anyways he's going at least fifteen miles down that bitch and ends up falling off halfway down due to the fact he can't hold his liquor worth a shit.” The blonde explains, his words only slightly slurred as the two boys follow Harry down the hallway to an empty patient room.

“Excuse me, Niall, not all of us are Irish bloody fuckers who can - ah, ah, ow, motherfucking shooting pains, shit,” The injured one, Lou, says. Harry wonders if it’s a nickname.

“He kinda hit his head when he fell too, it's gonna be hard to tell considering some of the shit that comes out of his mouth usually but,” The dark-haired one pipes up, his voice soft and raspy.

“Piss off. I don’t even know why you two are still here, Curly here and I can have fun all by ourselves, right Curly?” Louis slurs, peaking up at Harry through his messy fringe. Harry tried his hardest to ignore the little flutter of fondness that struck his chest, he was a professional, even if cute drunk boys with broken limbs don't often stumble into his ER room as often as you'd think.

Temporary Fix by winterpillowtalk (T, 4k)

Harry as a doctor? You bet is he. 

Charm Your Pants Off by 4ureyesonly28 / @evilovesyou (G, 2k)

When Harry hurt himself in front of all of his coworkers, he thought his Christmas Eve couldn’t get any worse. That was, until he ended up in an actual ambulance.

Perhaps the gentle and ridiculously attractive doctor he meets at the hospital can make his trip (pun absolutely intended) worth it?

Green Jello by orphan_account (T, 2k)

In Liam’s defense, he’d mostly been joking.

Louis didn’t see it that way, of course, but he wasn’t sure anyone else would either, had their best friend dared them to jump into the ocean in the middle of December “for the vine,” and they’d ended up in the hospital with a nasty case of pneumonia and a very high chance of being stuck there through Christmas.

Louis is stuck in the hospital for the holidays. The only spot of hope is his unfairly pretty nurse.

Sugar Let Me Be Your Passenger by teddy9 (G, 2k)

Someone must have deemed the situation serious enough to transport Louis somewhere else because when he regains consciousness he is notably not on the field. No he must have fatally injured himself and ended up in heaven. All of those half-hearted prayers to the big man when he needed to pass an exam at uni or make rent that month must have paid off because he was definitely in heaven if the celestial being above him was anything to go by. or

Louis gives himself a concussion playing football and Harry is the EMT who takes care of him and endures his shameless flirting on the way to the hospital

[k1ll3r-k4rg0]

Ryfraf, is there any movie you watch every year as a Christmas tradition?

“I like that one about that hive that has all sorts of fuck ups. I think it was called uhhhh Hive of Four Midbloods Spend a Very Eventful Christmas In Which They Get a Christmas Tree That’s Way Too Big for the House, Almost Slip and Die Putting Way Too Many Lights on the House That Don’t Even Turn on Until It’s Revealed That the Light Switch Wasn’t On, Drain the Power Grid Because They’re Super Bright Lights, Cause the Stuckup Highblood Neighbors to Have an Accident, Have Really Nasty Friends Come Over Who Bring Their RV That Explodes at Some Point, Have an Extended Elderly Friend Come Over and Bring Her Cat with Her, Burn the Turkey, Fry the Cat, Have an Extended Fantasy about the Lady from the Department Store, and then After All Of These Mishaps, and The Fantasizing of the New Swimming Pool From a Promised Job Bonus, Find Out that Said Bonus Is Just a Year Subscription to Jello, Absolutely Snap and Lose it All, Kidnap the Boss to Demand Money, and then Have a Big Discussion with the Local Law Enforcement Only For Everything To Get Nicely Resolved Because It’s Christmas. And the Woman of the Hive Has a Boob Window.”

Ryfraf smiles, proud to have remembered the name of the movie.

“It makes me laugh a whole lot because a lot of people get hurt in it for really stupid reasons and I think that shit’s kinda’ funny. Also it has a nice ending. So it makes me happy too lol. I think Christmas is about spending time with your hive and just.. good vibes. You survived the sweep. Congrats. Take a break, indulge in luxuries, and love your crew hehe. And your job! And your place in the system. Kinda’. Sometimes that shit pisses me off.”

[white--moon]

Ichigo being salty about him not being naked and readily available as often is funny and flattering. "I'm at home naked plenty. Enough that you came across it even before you were tryin'. You're not gonna miss out on anything." It's good to know he's not the only obsessive one in this relationship- Which is a thought that immediately makes his stomach do something weird and uncomfortable. They talked about it, they agreed, it's a relationship now, but he still doesn't quite believe it. Like if he mentions it, he'll get a funny look and he'll have to question his understanding of the entire conversation they had. If Ichigo told him he must have had a fever dream and he was making shit up, Shiro might believe it.

He scoffs, "I have a vivid imagination. It's a good look, trust me." He is definitely biased, but in this case, he doesn't think that's relevant. He's thought Ichigo was hot as hell right from the start and he's pretty confident he's not the only one that thinks that.

It takes him a short second to parse what Ichigo's saying through the nothing but combat boots and a big knife image, but he laughs. "We would'a made a mess of that jello." The hospital gown has a tie for a back. He's absolutely into it. "Should'a stayed at the hospital for another night. Told your sisters to sit in the hallway and cover their ears."

What is that smirk he's getting for? His brows furrow ever so slightly while he's looking at Ichigo. "Sleep," It's not even a competition. Ichigo looks sore and ready to drop. Shiro feels ready to drop, but more mentally than physically. If there were gods, or a god, or karma, or whatever, he would have thought he'd had enough stress and hassle to last a lifetime by now and shouldn't be forced to deal with this Yhwach bullshit. If he thinks about it too hard, he still gets a little pissy that Ichigo went and ruined a good thing for him, all because Shiro got mouthy and Yhwach got handsy and Ichigo has higher standards of acceptability than Shiro, or whatever. But it's fine. It's done, it can't be changed. He just refuses to dwell on it so he doesn't get pissed again.

The way Ichigo kisses always steals the air from his lungs. He really doesn't get it. He's never been much into making out and he's never particularly liked someone enough for real kissing, but Ichigo's different. The kind of different he doesn't want anyone to know about, so they can't try taking him away.

Ichigo starts moving around and it takes a moment to realize he's trying to pull his leg free from behind Shiro. Shiro lifts his weight a little, so he's not leaning back against said leg, but also drops his hand so he can run fingers along the entire length, thigh to calf, while Ichigo's moving. He settles back against the couch again when Ichigo slides across his lap, which is exactly where he wanted him from the start.

He groans under his breath, hands settling on Ichigo's hips, when Ichigo grinds down against him. He grips, strains upward in a lazy push of his hips, and fully realizes they're putting on a show in the middle of the warehouse, but really could not care less. He's done dumber shit in front of more people.

“It was ruined from the start. Business’s gotta go good.” For both of them, but especially for Shiro. If business collapses, Ichigo seems like he’s done ok job hopping thus far. But for Shiro, if it fails, and assuming he survives whatever the cause of its failure is, he has no idea how he’d move forward.

He pauses and his head tips to the side a little while he thinks about that, but he can’t get passed the image it paints long enough to figure out what kind of shop would have the right boots. He huffs a little. “Why’s that gotta be such a good look for you? Don’t you know how to look bad in something?” Ichigo looks pretty deep in thought himself, maybe seriously trying to figure out a place to buy boots. He’s pretty sure they could just look it up online. Or Ichigo could give him his knife back and get a more appropriately sized one. Shiro kind of likes the boots look though. His brows go up a little. “Outta what things? What were my options?”

He catches that hint of teeth, but he’s also so distracted with the warmth of hands against skin that’s been bared to the air all day. It sends a chill up his spine. He finally pulls his head from his hand, wanting to be able to touch Ichigo properly, but he kind of freezes up when a hand grips hhis hair and pulls his head back instead. The brief thought of how fucking easy it would be for Ichigo to slit his throat with that big ass knife sitting beside him flits through his mind before it’s gone. He groans quietly, shifting when his jeans start to feel tight across the front.

[pokeglitchden]

[A VIDEO IS UPLOADED DATED 7/2/23 AT 2:30 PM

A very unstable, stuttering video feed begins this recording. The great, golden plumed beast of a Pokemon is now standing within the rubble of a building that it appears to have pecked its way out of. Smoke billows from the sides of it, and its feathers are flecked now with dust and soot. It makes a strange series of muffled clicks and chimes as it frees itself, shaking and twitching like a nervous pidgey.

From behind the camera a voice can be heard cutting through the static.

Orion-Simon? You there? Can you hear me? Did I get the connection back?

As the picture becomes clearer, the green haired glitch city denizen, Rhŷs, can be seen backing away, along with their strangely grey plumed fearow. Orion's Solosis, Jello, can be seen bobbing in front of the 3TrainerPoke$, attempting to calm it with its psychic energy, but to no avail. The Pokemon remains scared and aggressive, almost in defiance of all their attempts to calm it.

Simon- Orion!! I have you! Update me on the situation, will you? Oh-... oh that really doesn't look good.

Orion- Yeah we have a bit of a situation here. It goes from scared and skittish to aggressive. It's…kind going between those two.

There is a pause. Orion can be seen backing up as the 3TrainerPoke$ looms above them, slowly approaching.

Orion- You do have a plan for capture right? Right?

The 3TrainerPoke$ swivels it's head and turns to focus on Rhŷs. It is clicking loudly now, a consistent, rhythmic beat as it launches itself, it's wings beating wildly. It strikes at Bwgan, ignoring Jello's slow bobbing entirely. The Pokemon cries out and Rhŷs stumbles back, checking their stalwart companion for wounds from the attack.

Simon- 3TrainerPoke$ are supposed to stabilize into other pokemon really abruptly when they're under stress. I was almost expecting that to have happened by now. But it seems like it's keeping its form despite all this.

The pokemon is advancing again. It seems to have gone from timid to aggressive once again on a dime. It is no longer running away. It is pursuing.

Simon- Capture… I mean you could try throwing a pokeball? It's a long shot, and it'll flag your Pokedex in Glitch City for having caught one. But it's worth a try, right?

At this Rhŷs steps forward. They unhook a pokeball from their belt, and toss it straight at the 3TrainerPoke$. Tension hangs in the air as it sails past and strikes the creature square in it's invisible void like face.

And it bounces off.

It lands with a hollow thud right right in the middle of the road and bounces once. For a moment everything is silent.

Simon- It's... REGISTERED?? How? Who in the world is going around training a 3TrainerPoke$? Unless..

Another sound like static interrupts him. Another surge is coming. This time the pokemon looks PISSED. The clicking is getting louder, and if this pokemon had a face to glare at them with it would ABSOLUTELY be staring them down.

Simon- Ok! Ok! Get out of there, we can think of something else! "It's slow. It's exceedingly slow, we can use that. And… and it changes its form so abruptly, sometimes that leaves weak points. If you strike it while it's vulnerable maybe it will deter it a little.

Rhŷs and Bwgan look at each other and nod. They jump on the back of their Fearow and take off to safety while Orion uses his solosis to teleport out of range. Shimmering streaks now taint the air and ground around the 3TrainerPoke$. It stands there, bristling, clicking fast enough to almost sound like a growl.

And then from off screen, seemingly out of nowhere.

An old man walks on scene slowly, his cane supporting him and creating a click with every step. He moves patiently, deliberately, as if he cannot see the danger that is in front of him. Or at least isn't deterred about it.

A beedrill flits nervously behind him. The one he caught a long time ago, teaching a young trainer how to throw.

He seems strangely fearless about this, squinting through glasses. He taps his neck.

Old Man- Tootsie, thief.

And the beedrill darts, moving quickly as the gigantic glitch pokemon bristles, crackling again. The beedrill snatches something away, the golden string of a snapped collar trailing behind it. There is a bright light, as the glitch pokemon starts to evolve, flickering extremely violently.

Then a much, much smaller pokrmon drops to the ground. A Clefairy bounces harmlessly off the cobbled streets, and instantly faints.

The scene is quiet now. Everyone involved merely staring on in disbelief. Simon's voice can be heard softly from over the speaker.

Simon- Orion? It might have an everstone! It's registered Right? Orion? Where did it go???

There isn't a response. Rhŷs and Orion stand dumbfounded, staring at the old man and the Clefairy now as he picks the fainted pokemon up and turns to leave. He shakes his head wearily.

Old Man- Back in my day you didn't catch those, you just went the other direction... Now someone puts a collar on one and let it out in a town. END OF VIDEO FEED ]

Well. That's the end of that. The 3TrainerPoke$ was stopped. Interestingly the fact that it turned into a Clefairy and not a Kanghaskhan implies that this was a frighteningly strong 3TrainerPoke$.

I'm glad that this is over. There's a lot of clean up to do. Orion and Rhŷs are alright, mostly. Orion is being treated for some caustic burns from an attack he took. I hope he recovers quickly

As for the Clefairy, we are taking a look into this now, trying to figure out just what happened here, and HOW it happened. I'm on my way to Glitch City to aid with the investigation.

I know, I know. Hospital, recovery, psych eval. I'm going to get my last evaluation done in Glitch City so that I can make my way over there sooner. It might end up being more relevant to my situation anyway.

But this is more important right now. There are a lot of mysteries here to uncover and... I'm starting to think we've only scratched the surface here. There's a lot about this we don't yet understand.

I'll be updating as we uncover more.

-Simon

[1997toyotatacomawaterpumpgasket]

“hey what’s the new discourse”

[nexus-my-beloved]

I saw it said once the idea that Adam like. Quotes vines or wtv all the time and Micheal is just really fucking confused about it. And since then I've built on to the idea that Adam will just, at the most random times, say something so stupid and so wildly concerning and Micheal is left completely bewildered and scared for his husband's mental health. So like, sure, there's the vines- "No one ever asks how the table feels" "Adam, what is wrong with you-? Do I need to call a therapist? Should I- are you having psychotic delusions-?" BUT. There's also just Adam randomly making a sound or speaking and it's like-

Adam, walking down the street and talking to himself: I've got to buy eggs and bread, duck. Quack. ~ W a t e r ~. Quack Quack. (Starts singing to himself) buh-buh-buh-buh- got any grapes? I should buy grapes-

Micheal, turning to his husband with a look of sheer concern and slight horror on his face: how did you look like you were wobbling jello when you said that-?

Also. Micheal likes to scratch and play with Adam's hair just for the reaction he gets of Adam melting and becoming putty in his arms. Both of them love it, Adam considering it stress relief and Micheal just enjoying making his lover smile.

They both absolutely talk shit about Destiel/Sabriel. Like.

Destiel, squabbling because of something dumb or Dean not talking about his emotions again or Cas being cryptic and seeming suspicious and tensions are too high:

Sabriel, Sam absolutely done with Gabe's shit and mere seconds away from smacking the shit out of him but also wanting to not hurt him, grabbing Gabe by the collar as he rambles on with a smirk that tells he KNOWS he's pissing Sam off and Sam about to either kiss him to shut him up or punching him hard enough to knock a tooth out:

Midam, sitting together cuddled up and Adam sipping a coke: you two need to get your shit together. Hatefuck or sum

I hope these supply !!

*crawling down your hallway and knocking on your door intensely* BESTIE BABES WAKE UP!

I NEED MORE MIDAM CONTENT AT THIS EXACT MOMENT!!!!!

(I did this with my sabriel post and you guys delivered, so drop any headcanons, or really anything at this point I'm desperate- And I'll reply or add onto them)

[reallyromealone]

Jello Rome it is me once again hope you doing ok may I ask for Ran haitani and V thank you for your time

The final request for my event it seems.

And ohooo this will be fun.

X

Ran never expected in his life to be married, a workaholic and a skirt chaser he never thought about settling down.

He really didn't expect to marry Mikey's brother.

"I just can't believe him! The absolute nerve!" (Name) ranted out as he aggressively cut veggies, rage filled as he vented to his husband who was listening carefully to the others words.

Why was (name) so pissed may one ask?

Mikey had been blowing (name) off lately, the younger Sano just wanting to spend time with his brother but Mikey was off doing god knows what.

It broke his heart when Mikey canceled out of (name)s birthday dinner.

Ran knew why mikey was doing this, (name) was becoming a more likely target but couldn't tell (name) why his brother was doing this.

It was Mikey's decision to do so.

Ran knew mikey felt bad about it and the toll it took on (name) made Ran feel like shit as well because he could so easily fix the situation.

"I'm sorry baby, how about I talk to him?" Ran said sweetly as he took the knife from (name)s hand, those veggies had been abused enough. "Why doesn't he want to be around me... He's my only family left" (name) mumbled and turned to hug ran, the tall man hugging back and kissing his head.

"Sorry for ranting..."

"Baby I will always listen to your venting"

[justsomeclintasha]

“Where is she?”

“I think you have the wrong room, miss.”

“Natasha. I will not ask again.”

The mission had gone to shit. He’s tired, desperately needs a shower, and doesn’t have time for this.

“And who the hell are you?”

“None of your concern.”

The blonde narrows her eyes and sits in a chair. The empty hospital bed spans between them. Frustrated, he crosses his arms and waits. She breaks first.

“Is she okay?”

“Still not sure it’s any of your concern.”

“I am her sister.”

“Yelena?”

If she’s surprised, she hides it better than he does.

“You know about me.”

“Some.” He studies her for a moment. “They took her for a scan to check for internal bleeding. So far, a broken wrist, some broken ribs, concussion.”

“What happened?”

“What didn’t?” The question is dry and rhetorical. He scrubs a hand over his eyes. “I’m going to grab a coffee.”

XXXXX

He returns with two, his black, hers with two sugars. It’s important to know how someone drinks coffee. Natasha told him once and he had filed it away for later use. Now, he’s glad. He sips it before he hands it to her. She doesn’t thank him. He doesn’t take it personally.

The sounds of wheels in the hallway draws their eyes to the door. A nurse helps transfer Natasha back to bed and lay down. Clint is at her side in an instant.

“Alright sweetheart?”

“Sore. Tired,” her voice trails, as if speaking is difficult. With the sedation drugs, it probably is. Sleepy eyes float across the room. “Lena?”

“Hey.”

“What.. should be.. Berlin,” she mumbles.

“Had to come and make sure you weren’t gunna die on me, Natty.”

“Not dead yet.”

She sleeps.

XXXXX

No internal bleeding.

It’s good news and means she can leave the hospital soon.

Yelena studies Clint with her sister- the way he rubs a thumb over the back of her hand as he holds it, presses a kiss to her knuckles when she stirs. She doesn’t understand.

He’s so gentle. So caring.

Suddenly she realizes he’s watching her, but his eyes are soft.

“I guess we haven’t really been introduced. I’m Clint Barton, former circus performer, best archer in the world, member of Shield. And of course, Nat’s partner.”

He grins easily and she raises an eyebrow.

“Circus performer?”

XXXXX

Natasha wakes halfway through a story about acrobats. It takes both of them a moment to notice, but she’s content just watching them talk.

“And I thought, oh piece of cake. I could do that. How hard can it be to backflip off an elephant and grab the rope?”

“This did not happen.”

“Oh it did, but poorly. Broke my nose and sprained my ankle. Horrible landing, and a really pissed off elephant-“

“Natasha?”

Instantly, his attention is back on the redhead next to him.

“If I knew getting hurt would bring you together I would have done it sooner.”

“How are you feeling? Ready for us to break you out?” Yelena asks.

“I’m so hungry for food that isn’t jello,” she admits. “And I really want to wash my hair.”

“I’ll help you get a bath when we get home.”

“No, I will do that, assuming you can cook?”

“He absolutely cannot cook,” Natasha cuts in. “But pizza from Luigi’s sounds amazing. Will you stay with us for a few days?” she asks hopefully. Yelena glances towards Clint and shrugs.

“Until you are better. And only if he tells me more about these elephants.”

[theletterwsartflap]

goop man mercury now

Oh slime man my beloved my absolutely disgusting prick of a favourite character...

Mercury is one of those characters I never expected to like as much as I do when I first saw him but he... really grew on me. Something about a robot that's made out of a semi liquid or slime? Sign me the FUCK up.

Some longer time followers are probably aware I headcanon him as a shapeshifter. His primary function if you will in the Stardroids are things such as infiltration, surveillance, scouting, etc. Despite being usually seen in a semi liquidated form, he's actually a pretty prickly fellow personality wise, right full of piss and vinegar. On the flip side he's deathly loyal to his commanders (Terra and Sunstar.)

He's actually a very swift shapeshifter, he just likes to draw it out and make it as disgusting as possible when he has an audience. He can transform into anyone he's seen before, and will act to fit the part. The giveaway will always be his pink irises and sharp teeth, though his acting is convincing enough it more often than not goes unnoticed until it's too late. He is also able to give the liquid of his body a corrosive property.

Mercury enjoys gelatin based foods such as jello and gummy bears.

[neekrobite]

so my grandma had a stroke while no one was home, but managed to call 911 before she had anything major happen to her, when she got the hospital the doctor said she'll never walk or talk again because her left side of her body was completely paralized, and my aunt found out she was there, and went to go see her and give her food

now my aunt fucking treated her like a baby, like "here comes the food, open wide, yummy yummy!" which is fucking hilarious because my grandma was lkie 50 or something and she was a total bitch about everything, and this pissed her the fuck off, but what really did it, is that my aunt was giving her the food she absolutely hates, jello

my grandma slowly managed to raise her paralized hand upwards, and my aunt was completely shocked and said it was a merical, then my grandma fucking slapped that shit across the room, my grandma, was so fucking pissed she unstroked herself

you won't believe this, my grandma waasn't paralized for life because my aunt pissed her off so fucking much with jello