#this is a long post but i had to rantttt

[mobirights]

MOBI DEAD GAY WIZARDS (not really but still) RANTTTT

I have major writers block, so for anyone who cares, I'm gonna talk (rant) about the Descendants movies/books while I write a chapter for my Descendants AU jegulus fanfic (the children are innocent linked here).

We DO NOT talk enough about how in the first Descendants book (don't talk to me about how canon or non-canon those books are, they ARE to ME, OKAY?) Ben and Mal had dreams about each other before the VK's got brought to Auradon??? like WHAAAAT. It adds SO MUCH to their relationship and those layers WILL be included in my fic. Like it makes so much sense???

Cause, like, even though we love Ben and Mal, we can all collectively agree that it was crazy how he just left Audrey, right? Like love potion, I know, I know. But my girl had every right to be upset because her boyfriend doesn't even break up with her, but just declares his love to the new girl who is a VILLAIN KID, through SONG, during a sports game where AUDREY was cheering for him??? And was low-key being weird (flirty, awe-struck?) with Mal from the second they met??? Like. Queen of Mean was so valid (and personally one of my fav songs).

BUTTTT if we think about it with the knowledge that he was DREAMING about Mal months prior, it makes so much sense. When he first met Mal when the vk's came to Auradon, that was the moment it clicked for him who he'd been dreaming about and he was down bad from there. I still think the whole love potion fiasco was unfair to Audrey, especially after Ben jumped in the enchanted lake and realized he was under a spell AND I refuse to believe that the scene at the end of Descendants 3 was the only conversation Ben and Mal had with Audrey about it. Like that apology wasn't even a real apology??? I head-canon that they had a much deeper conversation where they THOROUGHLY apologized to Audrey, her to them, and they ate strawberries and lived happily ever after friendship. But anyways.

It makes so much sense. Even though I hate what Ben did to Audrey, we also find out in the books that he had been questioning their relationship before he even met Mal or considered bringing the VK's to Auradon. He had been questioning EVERYTHING about his life in Auradon. (so James Potter coded of him honestly) Like we learn so much in the books and it's fucking crazy (I could make whole other post about THAT btw).

AHHHH. Like guys you don't understand, that children's book has me in a CHOKEHOLD because of... everything?? Like ugh.

But back to the dreams. That's so destiny, fate, soulmates coded of Ben and Mal. How did they dream about each other? THEY NEVER MET. We learn from Ben that he feels trapped in Auradon. Bro barely even leaves his castle??? Like at all??? (The United States of Auradon is an insane place when you think about it after reading the book) SOULMATES. IT'S THE ONLY EXPLANATION. He couldn't stop thinking about her after the dream. And at the end of the book, surprise surprise, he gets his idea to bring the VK's to Auradon after thinking about her. Like, of course he's doing it out of the goodness of his heart and because he wants change in Auradon, BUTTT.

It's also because of Mal.

He was thinking about her before he had the idea, thinking about how she is a poor unfortunate child trapped on the Isle. LIKE the way he stared out at the Isle before he made his proclamation (very much included and expanded upon in my fic) is so yearning, longing, 'I need you now, but I don't know you yet' core like- GUYS. you don't UNDERSTAND. They're everything to me. Soulmates, I tell you, SOULMATES.

The Descendants series has been all I can think about since starting this fic. Primary school me is having the time of his life because he too was obsessed with it. He didn't understand the NUANCES back then, though. I do. And I'm gonna share with it with the masses.

Everyone read the Isle of the Lost books by Melissa de la Cruz because so far it's so good! I'm only on the first one, but I love it. The writing style is amazing and also hilarious, and one thing you guys should know about me is that writing style means EVERYTHING to me. It's unfortunate because I've missed out on really good fanfics and normal novels because I just couldn't stand the writing style. But alas.

Expect more rants because talking about it inspires me to write and, as we've already established, I like to talk A LOT.

[it-is-i-mommy-milkers-1000]

@paint-lady thanks for the offer! i did notice some missions and bosses need more ppl to defeat *throws em a side eye* but for now im trying to get through as much of the game solo and free, just to see how much i can do all on my own >:D @chiclet-go-boom the game honestly kinda reminds me of vampire the masquerade bloodlines, but if it was open world. might be because of the graphics? i dont know, but it gives me nostalgia feels from the get go. swl makes me a little teary ngl, its sooo much fun! and since you asked for the pics~ eheheheheeh (i got so many ss, maybe too much, ill try to narrow it down)

meet lucile preston, quiet unhinged will-throw-herself-into-a-dangerous-situation-without-any-thought-behind-her-eyes-because-its-fun trickster templar (shes so fucking pretty ohmygodčlafelm i love her) r. sonnac (sassy cat-boi faction leader) questions how this novice is even alive at this point, yet reports of her successfully completed missions keep arriving, and he eagerly awaits each one to drink up like his favourite tea brand i imagine her powers to be somewhat electric (her hair is the main inspo), and she can teleport fast short distances with them (imagine like ciri from the witcher). she thrives in pandemonium. she was able to fight before the bees altered her life, but the templars mainly taught her the basics with how to use guns and her power, so i headcanon it that she just got really good at them while she spent her time at the solomon island (plenty of targets to train on there over the course of several months) i picked templars for my first playthrough because i feel like they make the most sense to me story-wise. my second time is def going to be with one of the other two factions.

now here are some scenery ss i took! this game is so damn PRETTY goddddd

there's so much content in this game i can gush about, from the worldbuilding, to storytelling, to fantastic npc's, so on, but one thing i don't particularly like is the fact that quests don't necessarily seem to have a conclusion. i don't know if this is a thing that only happens in this game, or if this is a part of mmo's in general (this is my second mmo i've ever played). but i do a quest, i have a blast while it lasts, and just as i complete it, i just get a notification that its over, no further dialogue, or roleplay involved. the most i get is a hint in my lore tab where you get something like "the talk of the town" achievement, and there was a part with john wolf where he nodded at the fact that i defeated jack the lad before. so it mostly comes down to me just headcanoning the hell out of the interactions i do get to make it make sense in a way. which brings me to my second issue, where i thought that there would be more interactions with the "big three" (the characters from the promo trailers that we get to interact with in the beginning). from as much i could read and gather, without spoiling myself, there is not many interactions with them? and that makes me kinda disappointed because i was really excited and hoping to play with those characters more. i really want my character to feel like she made a lot of connections with people, be it good or bad. but i can only do that if i decide that's how it goes, it doesn't really happen in the game now to fangirling

i recently played the quest "maine chainsaw massacre" and i cackled like a gremling while taking swipes at all the zombs at the beach. that chainsaw is now my new favourite weapon. altho i cannot use it anymore (ノД`)・゜・。cri as you can see, there are zero zombs in front of me cuz i cut through em like butter mwahahahahah this game is so gay. MAM please. youre staring into my soul kjsdfjfd

Madame Roget please kiss me.

SO GAY.

my favourite monsters so far are: the revenant, jack-o-lantern (as ive mentioned), will-o-wisps, spectres, boogeyman, those little rock golems and scarecrows! i absolutely despise draug and familiars, zombies i can somewhat stomach (those are mainly just because ive fought sooo much of them, theyre annoying) tbh most quests that are there just sort of as a grind tactic i don't really like playing because i quickly get bored of them. my main form of entertainment were always story related quests. i got a lot of them over at kingsmouth and the savage coast (that part was awesome), buttt not so much at the blue mountain which is where im currently at. The black house was so cool and creepy to play! i love how in the lorebook its says "the black house stood silent.." and then you go up to it and it sounds like a stomach of a giant beast gurgling and moaning, all cracking wood, and of course, theres blood dripping from the ceiling *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ i just sorta headcanon those little things as maybe a normal person that has no ties to the world beyond would see that black house and not hear anything, they would just get this uneasy feeling to stay far far away, while the bees can see its true nature. the atlantic island park was *chefs kiss* i honestly wish we had more quest there and then the pumkin head jack!

when i tell you i squealed from excitement when i found out i got to continue to play this story

lmaoo "By the way, you do have other priorities on the island." i love sonnac sm

best quest. john wolf best quest giver.

hes so dreamy *swooooooooooooon*

oh my god JUST KISS ALREADY

lucile will marry the heck out of him. BEST OTP <3

and since were at the end, here are some honourable ss:

fighting hellspawn like a pro

same energy

and this cursed pic of smug lucile <3

i need to mention for posterity that the first time i played this game and walked into this theme park, i lasted about five seconds before i turn right the fuck around because the air started to warp around me and i was not ready for reality to nose dive like that.

i went back awhile later and the air warped and the creepy music was playing and i walked past the gates this time, stood there with my axe in hand to see what was going to leap out at me and then walked right back out again because nothing did but i Did Not Trust It.

seriously, this game gave me the heebie jeebies every single game session. do NOT even talk to me about Blue Canyon Mine. or The Black House. i spent more time just standing there waiting for the weird shit to jump out and eat me than anything else, and i was almost never disappointed.

[woulddieforperrytheplatypus]

do you have any hcs of characters that have very little screentime? like background villains or characters that only appear in like one episode? sorry if my phrasing is weird, i just wanna make sure im not the only one who's latched onto characters like Professor Mystery or Orville and have dragged them into headcanon hell.

I literally love minor characters purely because you can make up as many headcanons as you want and no one can tell you you’re wrong omfg it’s time ti rantttt

I’m gonna go out on a limb and say you probably sent this after reading this post just because you mentioned Orville and I have literally never seen anyone else mention Orville in my entire life so this first one’s basically a repeat but shhhh we’re gonna pretend it’s not

- Dr. Diminutive does more evil than any other evil scientist at LOVEMUFFIN. Heinz and Rodney are all about the show, but Diminutive keeps his ideas to himself so he can get away with a lot more without OWCA asking questions. He would have been a much better leader for LOVEMUFFIN had he not been dismissed for his height. 

- Dennis the Rabbit used to be OWCA’s best agent. He was even better than Perry, and they’d worked a few cases together back in the day because they were the best OWCA had. 

- I don’t know if Monty counts as a minor character, but I headcanon that he and Vanessa only broke up because he was too busy with work, and that not long after the summer ended, he started traveling a lot for OWCA. 

- Again, Lawrence isn’t too much of a minor character but tbh he doesn’t get as much screen time as he deserves so we’re gonna go with it. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Lawrence absolutely knows Perry is a secret agent. He never mentions it for the same reason he never mentions the boys’ inventions: he doesn’t think anything of it. 

- Roger is such a hit with the American people that they get rid of the rule that you have to be born in America to be president just so he can be president. They almost revoke the two-term limit too, but the rest of the government has to step in for that one.

- I will admit that I didn’t think of this one myself but Lyla was totally raised by animals, but, unlike Heinz, she actually sees herself as an animal more than she sees herself as a human.

- Mama Ocelot didn’t really like Heinz, but the baby ocelots loved him. They saw him as one of them, but they also knew he was different, too, and that made him really cool. 

- Charlene is a really nice, really successful woman. She was decently wealthy growing up, but earned most of her fortune herself through hard work. Part of the reason she liked Heinz was that he was never after her money, and he didn’t treat her any differently when he found out that she was on the road to riches. Even now that she’s stuck paying alimony, she doesn’t mind because even though Heinz should get a job and god knows there are some he’d be really good at if he’d just try, he’s clearly a good person and he clearly cares about Vanessa. Also, she finds Norm very weird but she still thinks he’s cool.

- Unpopular opinion but I think Heinz’s dad was worse than his mom, but we don’t see him enough to know that.

- That one Scottish cousin Ferb has that we literally see for like two seconds is actually Ferb’s favorite cousin and the feeling is mutual. The Scottish cousin is always trying to convince his parents to let him visit Ferb, partially because he wants to see Ferb again in person for the first time in ages but mostly because he’s never met the Flynn-Fletchers and he really wants to meet Phineas and Perry in person.

- This is another one I’ve mentioned before but 2D Candace and Perryborg were basically mortal enemies, and even once 2D Doof is locked up again, they have a very strained relationship because they both remember that they’ve hurt each other a lot and neither of them are quick to trust the other (and one day I will write a fanfic about this but I gotta finish one of my WIPs first)

- Jerry the Platypus was so fucked up that he didn’t disappear with the rest of the Perry clones. He showed up again in something, and I totally didn’t just stop what I was doing to google it but yeah, he showed up in the preview for Meap Me In Saint Louis (ya know, the third Meap episode) and even though none of the preview scenes are used at all like they look like they will be, this one is because Jerry is alive and he is adorable and no one can take that from me!

- Steve the no-longer-giant chameleon is also absolutely fine and probably living his best life with Jerry. 

And off the top of my head, that’s about all I got! I hope you cringed a little while reading, and if not, I didn’t do a good enough job 🙃

[whumping-out-of-timee]

Oh man as a kid I used to be really really obsessed with dinosaurs

There was a museum that was all about dinosaurs and other extinct animals, I went there an insane amount when I was younger, nothing ever changed but it was such an interesting and fun place with so much stuff to look at

I still really love them, I recently ordered a hat that has little dinos on it :)

I'd love to hear any facts you have about them if you wanna share some

Tumblr didn’t post and deleted my massive rantttt, noooooo. I’ll try to recreate it:

As a kid I loved that BBC show “walking with dinosaurs” sooo much. I kept making my mom get it from the library for me and that’s all I watched. I still really love dinosaurs :)

I wishhhh I had a museum to go to as a kid. I was gonna go to the Chicago field museum this summer but covid ruined it. They have all kinds of stuff!! They’ve got sue (now with proper belly ribs) they’re also got a massive titainosuar in the lobby! It takes up the whole room. And now they’ve got the life reconstruction of sue and it’s so beautiful! It looks like a real animal and it’s very accurate (with current info)

if anything I just ended up liking them more, it’s gotten worse and more weirdly specific. Some of the things I watch could be considered lectures. PBS eons is really good on YouTube, they have all kinds of natural history stuff, always very interesting! But if you want a lecture and some specific dinosaur anatomy from a paleontologist then there’s stuff like “your dinosaurs are wrong” by the channel ‘chaotic good’. I love that as well but it can be a bit of a chore at times. University of Alberta also gives free paleontology classes online. There’s 3 of them I think.

I’m probably gonna go into paleontology after I finish my biology degree.

I was going to put some of my favorite fossils here but I’m just gonna put a sketch from when I visited a small museum in Texas. I lost all the actual photos (phone tried to explode, don’t ask). This post is already too long. You’ve opened Pandora’s box

I can’t attach it because somethings wrong with tumblr :) imagine being a functional website.

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