#this is 30 images and thousands of words i deserve all these tags

[fullonfandomindulgence]

dimple is a great fucking character and i will fight anyone who says otherwise. specifically i will fight them by making them read this masterpiece client-crashing god-tackle effortpost about dimple

ive deliberately put off watching the telepathy arc episodes so i could finish this. i like tome So Much. you have no idea how much willpower it took. but it is done and its abt dimples like whole story and purpose and life and i think its a real good thing for you to read and enjoy

im so serious about this that I'm gonna capitalize and punctuate. My sorta thesis here is that Dimple's goals of manipulation are an expression of the basic act of choice that Mob Psycho 100 defines as living, but caring for Mob freaks him out because it distracts him from that purpose, and that contradiction and desperation to choose to live through control is tragically what ends him. Dimple is a friend. Strap in, motherfuckers, we're going for a ride.

Dimple's Goals (Dimpoals)

This is kinda an easy one.

I'm gonna be using images from the show and the comics but I'm not talking about anything past season three, episode six, so no worries anime-onlys. I describe all relevant visual info for each image, though there are also extra IDs in the alt text--I try not to repeat information.

Dimple wants to be a god, "the ultimate being in all creation," "the greatest power in the whole world," and "an object of devotion for all humanity." This dovetails with ideas about superiority and idealism in other parts of the comic but this post ain't about that. It's important that he never says what he'd actually do as a god. Like what is the power for? This comes up in his final confrontation with Mob, too.

Dimple claims that Psycho Helmet leads "people onto the right path," but the second Mob interrogates that he admits he has no plan, "no codex of any kind" from the comic. I don't think that's entirely true, though. Clearly Dimple doesn't care about ruling, because he doesn't actually know what he'd do with the power. But he does want to be revered--he wants positive attention!

Dimple's LOL cult is all about people laughing, and in this panel he says he chose that so he could gain a following without violence. Dimple's attempt with the divine tree is the same, he's trying to keep people the same besides their worship of the tree, make them feel happy in togetherness, help them "find peace at heart." I think there is a reading where making people happy is just a means to an end for Dimple. He for sure tries to kill Mob the first time they meet. But he doesn't have any logic for why he's not, like, using his powers to threaten people and demand tribute. He wants to become a god by making people feel good.

All this said--he's not gonna do it by being himself.

Identifying as evil

When Dimple meets Reigen he identifies himself as an evil spirit. Obviously this is sort of a joke. Like the idea that Mob's pet/mascot is actually an ancient malevolent ghost is pretty funny. But it's meaningful for Dimple's character too, so let's talk about what "evil" looks like. First, obviously the possession thing. How good is it that among all the people trying to manipulate Mob, one of them wants to literally control his every move? Second, here's a bunch of bad stuff Dimple did that Mob thinks about right after Teru tries to exorcise him:

Bro! She's like fourteen! (Dimple makes a lecherous comment about Tsubomi in this image.) He threatens Reigen, he tells Mob the body improvement club is a waste of his time, he straight up asks Mob if he can possess him... He's vindictive, pushy, mocking, and transparently manipulative.

Now to be fair lots of Mob Psycho characters are Like That. But there are some other things more specific to Dimple. Third, he tries to possess Ritsu, taking advantage of his fear of Mob. Fourth, again, the attempting-to-kill-Mob thing. Fifth, here's a bit from a recent side story:

My god. Dimple is terrifying in this. If you haven't read it, Uu is a little dog spirit that Reigen's been keeping around as a pet. Dimple notices that it's feeding on Reigen's energy so he gets rid of it. In these panels he waits until Reigen asks him where Uu is before telling him that he ate it. He has all these lines on his face and this expression of like hostile delight. There are creepy effects blobs behind him. He burps! He does a thing he knows will hurt Reigen and then rubs it in his face, acting like he takes pleasure in it. And finally from one of my favorite scenes in season 2:

I love love love this scene, when Mob is asked to exorcise the ghost family and he refuses. It takes the existing tropes in the story and introduces this like moral complexity and thoughtfulness, it communicates a change in stakes... "They won't have to exorcise you if the clients are dead." Again Dimple is smiling maliciously. He tries to manipulate ghost dad into attacking the college assholes, which is the one hand, for the purpose of getting him exorcised by Mob, which is the other hand. Harm in both directions. There is a third hand! We'll get to it.

But I want to summarize this section first: Dimple's default tool for dealing with adversity is manipulation. He, unlike, say, Reigen, is very comfortable looking like the bad guy, and to some extent he believes he is one. He wants to reach godhood by making people feel good, and he's going to do that not through bloodshed or by being a paragon of virtue but by using other people's flaws to control them.

The Living Spirit

Sorry, I want to do some more stuff before I get to the third hand.

I'd like to think I've been helpfully analytical up to this point, though probably not too novel. But I haven't seen anyone talk about this. Dimple is the liveliest dead guy in the comic, by a wide margin. He has multiple genuine relationships with people, he gets embarrassed, he gets happy, he fears things, he fully laughs. Sure in-canon this might be a proximity thing but in a narrative context I think it's significant that he's so much more of a character than other spirits. Here, in essentially his introduction as a significant character, he says, "I don't want to spend the rest of my life as a ghost!" There's also a great pun he makes in the Dark Horse translation when Reigen questions the existence of urban legend spirits--"Look, pal, just because you're a fake, don't disrespect the lived experience of the dead!" He thinks about living a lot.

Dimple comes back from apparent evaporation more than once, first when Mob exorcises him at the LOL meeting, second when Teru exorcises him in their first encounter. He really really wants to live.

Then there's the brief conversation between him and Reigen about the woman being stalked by what appears to be a spirit, but ends up being a neighbor astral-projecting himself. In this panel Dimple denies that spirits get horny. "It's not like we can do anything about it." He doesn't even think about like romantic love. So most importantly, canon aroace Dimple. But also Dimple believes that being a ghost reduces your existence. It's not even a possibility to do certain things, whether you want to or not. There's a tension here, Dimple craves life but knows that as-is he can't have it.

And then there's this six-page omake at the end of volume five. Please please read it if you can, it's not in the anime and it's such a good little story. When Dimple is almost exorcised by Teru, he only just manages to pull together an ant-sized form, and is rescued from being eaten by a pig ghost by a tiny human spirit called Stubble. The above image is an abandoned house in the woods, with Stubble, off-screen, monologuing, "I simply don't want to perish. I don't hold any grudge against this world. Neither do I have any dreams. Years have passed, without a clear goal." Stubble lives an extremely reduced existence, figuratively and literally. He rides around on the back of the ghost of flea, i.e., he is dependent on the echo of a thing that needs to latch onto something else to exist. He has no agency at all.

It's disconcerting, how Dimple starts at Stubble's size and slowly grows--or, reframed, Stubble slowly shrinks. Here Dimple accuses Stubble, "You died, even before your death. But I on the other hand..." Stubble gets angry. "You're dead too!" Again you should read the story, the way it concludes really blows me away.

Remember in the first episode of season three the S&S crew help the bald guy out of his funk, and at one point he says, "Am I doomed to just repeat these meaningless days until my death?" And then, soon after, "Wait, is my life already over?"

This is about the desperation of agency. Because like, Stubble is right. Dimple has been dead for a long time. His goal is ridiculous. His existence is scraps, yet he's clinging to them with everything he has. What's the point? Lay down alone among the insects, shrink and fade.

Dimple doesn't have a counterargument to Stubble. He doesn't justify "why." But the last sentence he says in the omake is, "I want to stay alive." Dimple, and by extension this omake, and if I may be so bold all of Mob Psycho 100, identifies agency with life. It's not even that life is about making choices, it's that life is literally the act of choosing. You have to choose to live. And Dimple does.

He likes control. He likes choice. He may not be alive but he chooses to live every day. Why? Because he has a purpose: he's going to become a god. And he's going to take Mob there with him.

The Third Hand

Are you good? You're like 1500 words in, feel free to take a break, drink some water.

Maybe you're starting to sense where this is heading. On the third hand, Dimple manipulates ghost dad to help Mob. He attempts to take away both of their autonomy in order to ease Mob's obvious distress. Let's talk about Dimple's evolving relationship with Mob.

I say this a third time, Dimple tries to kill Mob when they meet. Then, despite a positive spin on his initial pitch to Mob, he's pretty transparently evil about it.

These frames of the show are from that introduction, the first with Dimple surrounded in stars and bright colors saying "Let's shoot for the top of the world together," the second with Dimple thinking, face lit from below and body language full of menace, "I'll just wait for my chance to possess him." To be fair again, lots of Mob Psycho characters are Like That. Compare this to the first episode of season two: when Mob tells Dimple the story about Emi, Dimple, excited, assures him that they should keep sticking together so Dimple can help him out with these things. The animators even use the same image of Dimple with the stars and colors:

"Looks like you'll always need an advisor like me!" But this time he doesn't have the sinister turn he did when they first met. This is how Dimple keeps acting throughout season two. He helps Mob, apparently so that Mob trusts him so that in turn Mob can help him reach godhood. But he goes so far above and beyond without any malice: he keeps Banshomaru safe, he possesses one of the high school kids bullying Mob, he eats the curse off Reigen's back, he tries to defend Mob against fucking Toichiro.

Here's a great couple panels: after Dimple explains the deal with urban legends becoming real, he reiterates that he wants to be a god. Then Mob asks Dimple to "make sure [Banshomaru] won't get hurt," and little surprise lines come off Dimple. He agrees but says, "You gotta do me a favor sometime too." Dimple is a little struck by Mob's trust, but maybe more importantly this is the first time in a while, and I think the last time in season two, that Dimple suggests Mob do something for him. It only comes after he reiterates exactly what his purpose is. Dimple's priorities are a little unstable.

Yeah this is just a full comic page from the encounter with Mogami but it's meaningful as shit. Dimple has just suggested taking over Mob's body to protect it. The first panel is Dimple looking away and down, deflated, ashamed. A few sweat drops come down his face. He says, "but something like that..." And to his surprise (action lines, closeup, wide eyes) Mob agrees. Dimple puts on an evil affect when he responds: a horizontally squashed panel shows his backlit face. He smiles unpleasantly and laughs a little, "Kuku..." But his heart clearly isn't in it! His eyebrows are worried, not hostile. There's no pleasure in his smile. He's covered in sweatdrops, eyes wide. When Mob assures Reigen, "It'll be okay," there's another panel of Dimple where the remnants of that affect slide off him. The backlighting is still present but not as severe, the echo of that smile is on his cheek. He's openly worried and covered in sweatdrops. Mob's speech bubble covers a large portion of his face.

Points about this. First, by now Dimple has given up on possessing Mob. This thing that seemed like the main path to his goal is not an option. Second, while both Dimple and Reigen believe that this is a bad idea for Mob, Mob disagrees. Dimple identifies as evil. Reigen identifies him as evil. Mob no longer does. This is classic Shigeo Kageyama behavior, being generous to people even when no one including themselves thinks they deserve it. And the worst part for Dimple is he's starting to agree with Mob. When the option he'd dropped is handed to him on a silver platter, he finds he doesn't want to take advantage of this kid that way. He's a different person than he was.

I don't even know how relevant this is but. Look how much fucking fun Dimple has when he's possessing Mob to protect him. He's doing all these flips and kicks. His smile when he's fighting Mogami!Asagiri is so funny. He does the wildest mid-air combo I ever did see when he attacks the Claw guy as Mob.

Mob becomes such a top priority for Dimple that in the first episode of season three he realizes he forgot that he wanted to become a god. Not only that, but when he comes to Mob to convince him to lead the cult together he's immediately distracted by Mob and what's going on in his life. Mob has to prompt him for him to remember that he's there about the cult.

All this is why Mob's mistrust of Dimple in this conversation is so tragic. Dimple has helped Mob so much, and been so much of a genuine friend, because he knew that Mob trusted him. Where did it go? What happened? Mob's parting words to him are, "Why don't you give your schemes a rest already?" What schemes?? This is the first he's had in months. The translation in the comic, though, is so much more brutal:

"Why don't you stop doing bad things?"

Dimple is

Dimple is terrified of Mob. When Mob wonders if Dimple is scared of him, he's right, of course he is. He has lots of reasons. Mob almost evaporates Dimple when they first meet, threatens him multiple times. Dimple saw him at 100% rage, Mob's first on-screen. He watched Mob hit ???% without being knocked unconscious. This is all especially threatening given Dimple's drive to live. He's terrified when Ritsu tries to fight Mob, he's terrified when Mob asks him if he had anything to do with Ritsu's kidnapping, he's terrified when he thinks Reigen is about to tell Mob that they don't know what happened to his family. But I also read his fear as a symbol of how important Mob is. Dimple attached himself to Mob as the way to achieve his goal. Dimple helps Mob out in so many ways, putting off his goal, so that eventually they can fulfill his purpose together. Then he starts caring about this kid so much that he forgets his purpose! Of course Dimple fears Mob, because their relationship threatens what drives him to live. As much as Dimple is a manipulator, Mob is the one who ultimately has power over him.

Dimple so easily reverts to an evil persona once he leaves Mob because without Mob that's all he can be. If he can't get to the top with Mob, then he has to do it the old way, by using people's flaws to manipulate them. He's able use the broccoli to become a physical presence and get around the "amazing power" problem--though the broccoli's presence and power are still kinda Mob's! But why does he need to become a god at all? Because that's all he is. If he doesn't have Mob and he doesn't have his purpose, then he has nothing.

"Don't go casually denying the thing I've been wanting so badly!" Dimple gets so angry when Mob tells him he's being fake because first, Mob is denying Dimple's manipulative tendencies, which are really important to Dimple right here because he feels his identity is so precarious. And because second, Mob is denying Dimple's purpose. Dimple is in equal danger from Mob's physical attacks and Mob's denial of what he wants. What he wants, what he chooses, is what living is. Dimple doesn't want to die.

Here's a lot of a comic page again, from the final confrontation. Dimple tells Mob that he's just been using him the whole time they've known each other. Mob says, "I'm sad... Does that mean it's time to say goodbye to Dimple?" He steps towards Dimple, who screams in fear and anticipation. I think this is basically the worst thing ever, because god, Dimple is so afraid. Mob is justified in what he's doing but Dimple's desperation is what stands out to me, how hard he's tried to cling to agency and life and how sincerely he believes Mob is about to take it all away from him anyway, to disappear forever and ever.

And then Dimple insults Mob's shirt.

Dimple insults Mob's shirt

Fucking kills me. These are two frames from episode six, Dimple sees how much Mob suddenly trusts him and his reaction is anger, "You okay with leaving me like this?" His eyes are wide, brow down in anger. And then what he says next, "I'm... a dangerous evil spirit!" Here the anger is present but has softened with worry on his brow. The lines by his nose and his pouty lower lip make him look scared and sad. This fight has made it important to Dimple's identity that Mob try to stop him, because he's evil, and Mob stops evil spirits.

Panels from the comic where Mob tells Dimple, "You weren't doing bad things. You were just doing what you wanted to do. Together with me. You trusted me before I trusted you, Dimple. Thank you." Mob doesn't think Dimple is evil, but he identifies how important Dimple acting on his wants is, and he tells him that he still values their relationship. He denies that he has to hurt dimple but affirms his power to choose.

I maybe could've skipped a lot of BS if I put this page further up but I wanted this to get felt, what Dimple's admitting to himself here. It's another section of a page. Panel one, a white splotch in darkness with Dimple's thoughts, "It felt like my ambitions would fade away. Did spending time with unselfish Shigeo cause even me to lose sight of my goals?" Panel two, Dimple is the white splotch. He's scared. "...eh? Wait, that's a problem...!! I'll lose my reason for existing!" So Dimple tells Mob, angry, "No, not yet... I'm not done yet! Even now... I've still got... plenty of things I want to do! And ambitions!" Mob agrees, with that tired, frank look. "I'll hear you out for real. As your friend." Accepting Mob's friendship like this is terrifying, because it means what it always has, forgetting about this purpose. What if Mob stops trusting him again? If he really, consciously abandons his purpose, will he still have agency? He wanted a friend, always wanted a friend. Will it be enough? Will he disappear?

Dimple takes Mob's hand anyway. This was such an amazing shot, I've reproduced its animated glory here, Mob and Dimple reach towards each other, Mob weakly, so Dimple closes the gap and grabs him. The hand grasp of all time. I'm not gonna talk about how this fits into all the other Mob Psycho hand symbolism, that's another 4000-word megapost.

It's worth it. I'm convinced that by involving yourself in a network of people and creating some sense of obligation to others you can actually give yourself an even deeper kind of agency than you could achieve alone. And this is awful, terrifying. Because it involves giving yourself up a little bit. You have to give up some control. Dimple wants to be a god, to have ultimate power and control, so much of him is his manipulation, but he has to give that up for this. Goals that may have guided you for a long time can become irrelevant--and then who are you? If you've defined your life by something for years, and at the end of the decade you realize you don't fit your definition anymore, where do you go? Dimple tells Mob, "Let's go home." But...

Panels from the comic, where Dimple carries a sleeping Mob and thinks, "I said 'let's go home,' but I don't really have any place to 'go home' to... And I don't have anything to aim for from here... I wonder what I should do now." That Dimple is allowing himself to think this is really powerful. I don't think this has to be a sad moment. Like obviously Mob thinks that Dimple's home is his house. He just asked him to stay away until he reverts to his smaller form, as in, he otherwise would've expected Dimple to stay with him. I appreciate the larger point that now Dimple feels unmoored, and deciding on a new purpose is existential. But I think Mob also has a larger point that he believes he can help moor Dimple. I think allowing yourself to wonder where to go next is so important. Dimple is where Mob was a few months back when he decided he wanted to join the body improvement club! He has a future, even if he can't see it very well.

Or, um.

I keep fucking crying while I'm writing this. I love the translation in the comic here. Dimple kneels before a prone Mob and, finger touching his forehead, says, "Listen well... I'm giving you orders for the first and last time. First, wake up. Stand up, Shigeo." Mob is still for a moment and then says, "...it's no use. I can't put any strength into my legs. I can't move my arms either." Dimple is very serious now as he relays, "Your body may complain, but still... stand up. Even if you cannot stand... you must stand." God damn it, god fucking dammit.

Sometimes it's not so easy to change. Your actions have consequences. Your history follows you. Dimple's desperate attempt to keep his old wants comes back to kill his new ones.

Dimple's final act is the same thing he always does, he manipulates Mob to protect him. And it is good and kind. Suddenly his reason for existence is paradoxical: he's going to have to die to fulfill it. Who exists to die? But that's not what it is. Because he's making a choice. He denies death, he says, no, you can swallow me whole, you can annihilate me, but even then you can't take my agency away from me. And I will use this final choice to protect someone I love.

Dimple was a friend.

[astromaki]

part 4 of second choice — ceo!shoto todoroki x gn!reader (x ceo!katsuki bakugo) (1170 words)

part 1. part 2. part 3. (previous)

tw ; minors dni angst, toxic family, low self-esteem, mention of divorce, mention of alcohol

extra info; all the characters are aged up (they are 30)

10 minutes after the confrontation. your mother called you that night, a few minutes after you left your home.

it was exactly what you didn't need at the time. that endless lecture, one of the thousands she had been giving you since you were little. those words full of venom had lost their importance to you over the years.

all the time the same slanders, the same insults, the same belittling. but it was all your fault, right ?

you were disappointing your family to get your way. how selfish were you?

thanks to your rich parents, you had married a wealthy and influential man in this society. just go to the gala with him, smile at the reporters. be presentable.

and yet that's what you tried to do. for months, for years. you wanted to be perfect for him, for this man. but did he even acknowledge the fact that you were living in the same fucking house ? of course no. so, divorce you from shoto todoroki ? do it, do it and you will be disinherited.

is that what you really want ? to please your family, stay unhappy with this todoroki.

it's the least you can do. you were a spoiled brat, no better than your father said you mother. why didn't you take a cue from your older sister and brother ? they seemed to have made it in life, unlike you.

so don't complain, you had only one purpose in life. just one, it's not too much to ask. to marry a rich young man from high society to raise his children and continue the y/l/n dynasty.

instead you went to law school, studied instead of slutting around with the bourgeois sons of your family friends.

you succeeded, you created your own name, not the name of your maiden or your future husband. you created this image of an influential person. confident, arrogant, the men were at your feet. but then shoto came.

you knew him from afar, a friend of a friend of your father's apparently. the young man was polite at every event, gala. well-bred, intelligent, charismatic, eloquent.

how could you not fall in love with him ?

then you were married to him. and he only needed that haughty look to destroy all those years of work.

he made you feel like a kid by his side, a spoiled, naive and reckless child. that ridicule and shame he made you feel when you had done something you were proud of.

this feeling of inferiority that you had managed to escape from your family, you had found it again with this frightening man. you had become the clown in your own house, the servants must have laughed at your domestic scenes.

he had succeeded in making you forget your wedding anniversary, savoring the pleasures that a man can give you with a simple compliment, or even a small sign of affection. the todoroki had always been a respected, even feared name. because of the father, now because of the son.

so, you were a fool to develop ever stronger feelings for him. ever bigger.

but it wasn't your fault, your parents didn't show you any love, any gesture of affection, you didn't talk that much except for business and inheritance.

their love was cold. reserved, distant. you knew they loved you, and that was enough for you.

you were used to that kind of affection, that was your definition of love.

that's why you were so easily attracted to those who didn't deserve you. those who so easily played on your true love. so easily in love with shoto todoroki and his cold love. that's what you knew well. you felt protected with that, and in danger when they gave you too much. too bad it wasn't reciprocated.

too bad you couldn't see that green jealousy tinting katsuki's cheeks. oh let's talk about katsuki.

that poor idiot who had made this rivalry in his head between him and shoto. he hated him for treating you so badly, neglecting such an extraordinary person as you. what did he see in momo that he didn't see in you ?

this asshole must have had very few neurons to miss the treasure that you were.

but he hated you too. how could you fall in love with him ? when katsuki was standing right in front of you ?

bakugou started from nothing, created this company, built a flourishing empire. and now he's playing with billions of dollars so he can approach you and your family with dignity at the most coveted galas of the moment in all of east asia. fuck, for you, y/n, he even became the enemy of shoto todoroki !

and all you did was complain that shoto didn't compliment your outfit or your new hairstyle. you were brainwashed. he knew that you would always return to shoto like a dog to his master. that all shoto had to do was whistle for you to come back and beg him to let you love him, again and again.

he love you sincerely, it's so pure, so loyal. and itd be the most genuine passion you would ever meet again. but his desire to destroy the todoroki son far exceeded his love for you, y/n.

what a pathetic fate. even in the eyes of your soulmate, between you and revenge, you would be the second choice.

todoroki was standing outside his window with a glass of scotch in his hand. he saw you leaving in the arms of your charming knight, now fleeing him like the plague.

katsuki was waiting for you in his luxury car, ready to take you to your so-called business meeting. seeing you walk away from him, from your home, to throw yourself into the lion's den.

he wasn't jealous, he wasn't happy either. he did not feel lighter or heavier. it's strange, it can't be explained. shoto finally got what he wanted for years. to see you go. and yet.

he turned his head slowly as he saw the car leave the property. his gaze fell on the bed, he foolishly expected to see you in your nightie on the bed, asleep on the edge of the bed. a tired sigh escaped from his lips. the same sentence ran round and round in his head.

you hadn't learned anything from your mistakes. you were always running to rich men who didn't care about you. like him, like bakugou katsuki.

he was almost tempted to look back you. it's true, even though, you had always been a pain in the ass for him.

what did he owe you now ?

"a couple of jerks, what a great pair. tell me you're going to win all her money in the divorce." sighs momo at his side.

shoto had his back to her, now following with his eyes the tiny point of light that was bakugou's car.

"i don't know. but at least we're free of that pain in the ass. she's gone." he says, almost whispering.

the young man put the pen on the desk, close to the sheet of paper that now contained your two signatures.

go check 5000$ if you want more toxic shoto <3

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[hopesbarnes]

Black Swan (2)

Summary: Y/N used to be a Russian spy under the code name Black Swan. But that was a lifetime ago, now she’s a part-time avenger, dance teacher, surrogate sister to Natasha Romanoff, and trainer to new Shield Agents. She’s come a long way from the days of killing targets and being tortured. But when someone from her past comes around will she be able to ignore her history anymore? Or will she end up falling in love with the only man her sister ever loved?

Warnings: Mentions of past hydra abuse 

A/N: Italics is a flashback! Taglist is open, send an ask. Make sure to check out my 900 follower writing challenge in my bio!!

It had been an especially gruesome day. Training seemed to last all morning and it felt like every inch of you was bruised or broken. It probably was. Luckily, you were given the afternoon off for ‘studies’. It happened very little that you were given any time without being watched, so everyone took advantage and relaxed. 

Natasha came up to you with a pleading look, “Пожалуйста, прикрой меня (Please cover me)” she said. 

“Куда ты идешь (Where are you going?)” You asked, despite the fact you were pretty sure where she was headed. 

She smiled sweetly, “на свидание с Джеймсом (On a date with James)” 

She was so naive when it came to him. From the moment they met, she was infatuated.  “будь осторожен, не попадись (Be careful, don’t get caught)” I said before adding “повеселись (have fun)”.

 You wanted to protect her from heartbreak, or something worse. But at the same time, she deserved to be happy. She ran away and you sighed. Nat was head over heels for the man, and you just hoped it didn’t interfere in training or get her in trouble.

James had arrived an hour ago and looked the same as he did over two decades ago. It was as if time had frozen and you were years younger. But if you’re being honest, Natasha and you looked the same too. All that genetic testing and drugs pumped into you slowed your aging amongst other things. 

 Memories started to come back when you saw him, some more pleasant than others. In particular, you remembered one of the times Tasha snuck out to see him. She used to be so innocent before the world hardened her. Seeing him was even harder on her. She couldn’t even stay in the same room as him. She left moments after he arrived with a shaky “I have to go do something”. Everyone seemed fine with that, but you knew she was freaking out inside. Sisters always knew when something was wrong.

You mistakenly called him James before he mentioned that he preferred to be called Bucky. When you had said his name he looks at you with confusion, as if he’s trying to search his brain for a memory that he’s unsure exists. He says he has few memories from the past, and all of them were right before he was ‘wiped’. You don’t mention the red room where he spent some of his missing time. Probably a blessing in disguise, all that happened there was bloody. Not worth remembering if it could be avoided.

After some polite small talk with Steve and Bucky, you excuse yourself to find Nat. You’ve seen her at her worst and know when she’s not alright. And this was one of those times.

You knock on her door, but don’t wait for an answer to enter the room. 

“What if I was naked?” she yells out annoyed when you find her attacking a punching bag viciously. 

You laugh, “As if that would stop me!” she joins you in laughing but continues to brutalize the bag. “Hey, what did that bag do to you сестренка? (sis)” You tease. 

She huffs in annoyance. “Does he remember?” 

“No, but when I called him James he looked like he was trying to. It might only be a matter of time,” you reply honestly. She should be ready for her past to come back.

“Duly noted,” she says. 

“I’m guessing by the state of this bag you remember though,” you say pointing at the bag missing stuffing. 

“Not hard, no matter how many times they cleared my head he always came back. It’s like he’s forever etched in my brain in grave details.” You nod and she slumps down against the wall. You go over and sit next to her and she rests her head on your shoulder. 

“I really did love him at one point. In fact, I think he’s the only guy I’ve ever loved.” You feel wetness on your sleeve but don’t dare to say that aloud. 

“Oh honey, I know,” you say stroking her hair. “But he’s not that person anymore, and neither are you.” She hums in agreement with this. 

“Do you think we can keep this between us. It’s not in any file and you are the only one who knows.” You’ve only heard her this broken a few times before. 

“I was never going to tell anyone, любовь (love). You keep a million things quiet for me, and I a million for you. That’s what sisters are for.” You both just sit in silence with her leaning against you for a while. 

A few weeks had gone by since Bucky moved in. He got into a schedule, and the initial awkwardness died down. Tasha still couldn’t be in a room with him for more than 5 minutes, but she’s slowly coming to terms that he isn’t going anywhere. 

You started putting together the girl’s solos for competition and finished the large group before moving on to a small group of the younger girls. You also started to train new SHIELD agents, a compromise you made to get off the field more. They all picked up skills easily and were quick on their feet. You were only needed for one mission at that time, and it was a quick recon that only took three days. Child’s work really.

It was a Thursday afternoon and the rest of the team was doing some press to promote the image that Avengers wasn’t just a group of superheroes who sometimes ruined cities. This left you and Bucky alone in the compound. You tried to avoid him, but he was everywhere. 

In the gym? He was working out. In the library? He was reading a book. In the garden? He was planting seeds. By the time you ran into him in the kitchen you had run out of excuses for why you kept leaving. This meant having to stay sitting on a stool and pretend you didn’t feel insanely uncomfortable around him. You resented him so much, but it’s hard to resent someone who doesn’t remember you at all.

“I know you,” he says frankly, pulling you from your thoughts. It takes a moment for the words to completely register.

 “Uhm yeah? We’ve been living in the same building for a month now.” You hear yourself say, praying that it’s what he is referring to, but knowing it’s not.

 “No, I knew you. From when I was the soldier, right?” You sigh. You knew he would remember eventually but you just hoped it wouldn’t be so soon. 

“Yeah, we knew each other,” You confirm. He frowns as if this was the harder of the replies you could give. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” 

“It wasn’t a particularly fun time for me. Plus, I uh- hated you. Probably still do. It’s unclear, you returning is super confusing for me.” He laughs at this, and you’re left confused. Who chuckles when you admit to hating them? 

“You think this is confusing? Try not remembering anything but snippets of your life! It sucks!” he's hysterical now. As if you had just told the funniest joke ever. “Russia right? I remember the cold.” 

You nod, “Да, добро старый отчизна (Yes, good old motherland).” He laughs again. 

“не очень по-матерински, да? (Not very motherly, huh?)” This makes you join in with his laughter. 

“So, you hate me?” he asks. 

“Hated,” you correct. “I’m unsure how I feel about you now.” 

He looks apologetic at this and says “I’m sorry for whatever I did to you.” 

“It’s not like you hurt me, and I know it wasn’t you. God, they were horrible,” you tell him before asking, “What do you remember about then?” 

He thinks for a moment before saying, “Not much. Lots of blood.” He says shrugging, blood was sadly a normal occurrence in both your lives. “A building with people telling me what to do. The cryo. But I remember you, and other girls. Why?” Deciding that this would take some time, you get up to make some coffee. 

“Hold up, let’s get some coffee and I’ll tell you about back then.” He nods.

After pouring two cups of coffee, both black you guide him to sit on the couch with him and get comfortable. 

“So around 30 years ago both my parents died. I was 18 years old and had no idea what I was doing, or how to protect myself.” he looks astonished by this. 

“But you look 25!” he exclaims. 

“You don’t look 100,” you add and he makes a face in agreement. 

You continue with your story. “I met a man and fell for him. Thought he was the love of my life. Turns out he was just looking for someone to turn into a spy for the Russian government. Within three months I was put in the red room or Красная комната as it was called. It’s where they trained their female spies. They took me because I was a ballerina. It had created was discipline, strength, and flexibility. All things you want in a spy.” 

“Steve said you were a dancer,” he says, “You don’t need to say anymore if you don’t want to. I get it.” You shake your head. 

“I need to do this,” you admit to him. He nods encouragingly.

“We also were experimented on. Injected with their versions of the super-soldier serum. Close to what they put into you. They did other medical things to make us into the best spies. I was put through the ‘wiping’ a few times, but it never stuck for the important stuff, just made little details fuzzy. We trained to be silent and deadly. They had me be part of the national ballet, as a cover. In between shows I was sent on missions to kill people, or steal information. Nobody ever expected a girl who wore tutus in front of thousands of people. I got the tag, Black Swan, after the ballet and it stuck.” 

You pause to take a sip of your coffee. “That’s where I met Natasha, she was also part of the red room. She was a few years younger and I tried my best to protect her in any way that I could.” 

“Where do I fit into this?” he asks. 

“You trained me. In all combat-related areas. Taught me how to shoot a gun, where to hold your arms to snap someone's neck. How to tackle someone twice your size.” He looks ashamed of this. “I know it wasn’t you, and if you weren’t there it would have been someone else to train me. It’s not the entire reason I hated you but it’s a part of it.” 

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Your past still haunts you. “Is that why Natasha leaves the room whenever I’m around?” He asks. You nod. “Thank you for telling me all of that, I know it’s hard.” You smile back at him. 

“Okay! On that note, how about we watch a movie. Ever see Mean Girls?”

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[ayankun]

coffee shop au bitches (working title)

here, have this rough draft of the first half of part 1.  consider it proof of concept.  (the concept is Destiel Coffee Shop AU, but actually good) (”good;” YMMV)

9.3k words; Cas is human like everyone else so to compensate I made him socially anxious af; there’s a brief unpleasantness wherein someone in customer service gets harassed so watch out for that I guess; Cas is also carrying a lot of baggage (literally and metaphorically) and it’s vague for now but a little wearisome so GLHF I promise when it’s done-done they all get the kind of happy endings they deserved from the show

The town of Lebanon, Kansas sprang up without warning, its tree-lined streets shockingly claustrophobic after the three hours of patchwork browns and greens streaming by the smudgy window, the rolling plains uninterrupted to the very ends of the earth until the blank blue September sky finally picked up where the horizon left off.

Castiel felt his eyes strain, forced to reel in his thousand-yard stare, as he squinted at the blur of tidy little houses perched along Lebanon's brief outskirts.  He blinked away from the window and pushed himself to his feet, sidling carefully into the aisle to pull his duffle down from the overhead rack.  In short order, the bus turned onto the tidy little Americana main street and rolled up to a tidy little bus stop, and, reaching back into his seat to retrieve his briefcase, he squinted out at this, too.  

The screech of well-worn brakes, the brace against the final lurch of inertia, the hiss and clack of the doors at the front and back folding open; with no more pomp and circumstance than that, Castiel's journey reached its end.  Clutching the handle of his briefcase and slinging the straps of his duffle over one shoulder, he edged down the aisle and nodded his thanks to the driver on his way down the steps.  Finally, Castiel planted his sensible shoes on the cracked sidewalk, looked carefully up and down the stretch of unremarkable, middle-of-nowhere civilization, and wondered what the hell he thought he was doing here.

The bus shrieked and rumbled back into the non-existent late afternoon traffic, a thick gout of black exhaust signaling its farewell, leaving Castiel behind before he had a chance to change his mind.  He watched its departure absently for half a moment, road-weary and numb.  Then he hiked his duffle a little more snug against his back, turned around, and began an unhurried stroll the shady two and a half blocks back to the motel on the south side of town.

---

"Been expecting you," the woman behind the counter said the second Castiel pulled open the glass door to the motel office.

He paused, looked over his shoulder, saw no one among the growing shadows of the motel's empty parking lot, no one except a trucker hopping out of his cab parked at the gas 'n sip on the opposite corner.  Castiel watched him jog across the street towards the Biggerson's, the lights of its enormous, highway-facing sign flickering on in welcome, and turned back to shoulder his way inside.  "I did reserve a room over the phone," Castiel said, approaching the counter, "And I was told that a few . . . personal items would be held for me at the front desk?"

The woman, Billie, according to her name tag, responded with a nod, less in answer to his question and more in the way one does when one is not surprised by what they've just heard.  She pulled the keyboard to the old desktop computer closer to herself with one hand, and held the other out, palm up, to Castiel.  "ID and credit card."

Setting his briefcase down on the floor, Castiel dug inside his overcoat's interior pocket for his wallet.  By rote he thumbed out the military ID to give her, but at the last second his heart gave a sharp little twist and he drew it back.  Her lips twitched, nonplussed, but she waited patiently until he handed her his driver's licence instead.  She studied the picture on it for a second, mouthed the name, and carefully considered the face on the photo compared to the face on the man in front of her.  He shifted his feet nervously, thinking he should have just given her the first one, if only to avoid looking any more disreputable than he already did.  

Evidently their hangdog looks matched to her satisfaction, though, and she snapped the plastic down onto the counter, shifted her attention to the computer to check him in.

"Room's yours for the week," she read off the screen as he retrieved his licence and put the credit card down in its place.  She slid it over to herself without looking, only glancing down to read the numbers, obsidian black fingernails clacking proficiently over the ten-key peripheral plugged into the side of the keyboard.  "Checkout's at eleven on the 25th."

When she slid the card back over to him, Castiel palmed it off the counter, put it back into the wallet behind his IDs (driver's license on top), tucked the wallet back into his overcoat.  "Um.  I'm not exactly sure yet -- I may need to extend my stay."  Absently, he wondered why he sounded like he was apologizing for it.

Billie looked up from the computer screen at him, neutral.  "Whatever you need.  We can do you by the week, month, whatever.  Got your card on file, so you just let me know when I should stop charging it."

Castiel tried a smile he didn't feel, thinking as he did so that he probably shouldn't have bothered with one, what with how it seemed to crumple his face in unnatural ways.  "I will let you know, thank you."

She pulled a blank key card from a drawer and ran it through the machine to code it for his room.  "Here you go," she said, slapping it onto the counter with another plasticky snap, "Room 401."

"Thank you," he said again, taking the key card and putting it into his coat's front pocket. She held up a hand to keep him from running straight off to the room, a slightly unnecessary gesture, since he had no intention to do so.  Not without the banker's box that she was now pulling out from under the counter.

It was sealed with tamper-evident tape, noticeably intact as she spun it 180 degrees so he could also see his name and a brief description of the contents inked with a tidy hand in the space provided on the lid.  Billie pushed the box toward him and then tapped a nail over one of the items on the contents list.  "She's parked out front."

Castiel peered down at the item she had indicated.  "Keys," it said, rather cryptically, in that unfamiliar, efficient script.  He nodded.  "Thank you."

He bent to pick up the handle of his briefcase, letting the duffle fall farther across his back as he did so in order to free up space under his arm for the banker's box.  It worked, albeit inelegantly, and he felt a little foolish as he fumbled the box off the counter and turned to go.  He felt even worse when Billie said to his back:  "I'm sorry for your loss."

No part of him wanted to say "thank you" again, so he just paused long enough to indicate that he had heard her, and then went out through the glass door and back into the shadowed parking lot without saying a damn thing.

---

Room 401 opened into a concise sort of entryway that pointed him toward a small kitchenette lit primarily by the glare of the Biggerson's sign falling in through the window.  The space featured a round table with peeling laminate, two plastic-and-stainless-steel chairs, a sink and a microwave and a loudly humming fridge.  It was downright lavish compared to the accommodations Castiel had shifted between for the better part of his life.

The banker's box went onto the table, to be ignored until the time came Castiel felt ready to pry inside.

He shrugged his duffle off onto the end of the bed, the briefcase going onto the floor at its foot.  Successfully offloaded, Castiel turned and sat beside the duffle with his hands in his lap, looking at the boxy little TV set sitting on top of a banged up little dresser; at the dusty looking armchair shoved back in the corner to his right, under a dusty looking lamp; at the dim alcove immediately to the right of the TV, keeping discreet the bathroom sink and mirror and the door to the toilet and shower.

He didn't know what to do now.

Twisting to look at the digital clock on the bedside table, he marked the time with no real interest.  Just after 6:30.  Not enough daylight left to try and find his way around town, too early to sleep.  Not that he really felt compelled to do either of those things.  Not that he felt compelled to do anything.

But he had to do something, though, didn't he?  He had to keep moving forward, in whatever small way he could manage.  He had to.

With a long sigh that seemed almost to empty him completely, Castiel got to his feet.  He pulled his overcoat off, went to the alcove closet to hang it up, stopped at the sink to splash some water on his face.  He took a moment to appreciate his appearance -- mournful and aggressively unkempt after two solid days on the road -- before stepping out of the alcove to retrieve the briefcase.  He opened it on the bed and slipped the laptop out, digging around for the charger, and brought both to the dresser, setting the laptop to one side and plugging it into the outlet he found by tracing the TV's power cord.

He stood there, hunched a little over the open laptop, waiting for it to wake from its hibernating state.  He could check his email, at least, or scroll through the news he'd missed while in the air and in taxis and in the air again and in buses that sailed too quickly through isolated islands of 4G signal that lit up only a single bar before going dark again.

His desktop loaded, the wallpaper a heavily-filtered photo he'd pulled from who-knew-where:  just an expanse of faded teal, adorned only by a single, old-fashioned kite, bold and bright with primary colors, pinned there on the sky by an unseen breeze for all eternity.  He had set it a long time ago and never changed it; the image was a small comfort, though for what reason, he couldn't tell.  It wasn't his memory.

The fleeting sense of well-being provided by the tranquil wallpaper faded as quickly as it had come.  The only Wi-Fi network in range was named "Big D's iPhone" and it was locked.  Castiel refreshed the network scan a few times, hoping to see something that looked like it was related to the motel, but nothing else appeared.  He fished his phone out of his pocket for a second opinion, but it, too, displayed just the one fishy looking hotspot and very little 4G, even though he swung it around like an idiot, dowsing the room for a signal, watching the littlest bar wink at him no matter which out-of-the-way corner he took it to.

He even found himself squeezing between the table and the window, pushing the curtain aside as if the radio waves were having trouble making it through the few millimeters of dusty fabric.  He knew better, but it couldn't hurt.  In the Biggerson's lot, catty corner to the motel, a sleek black muscle car came to life with an animal growl, and he watched it prowl out onto the street and streak out towards the highway, taking Big D's iPhone with it.

---

It wasn't Billie manning the motel office when Castiel made his way back inside.  He didn't know why this should surprise him, but the fact that his expectations had been subverted in such a minor way somehow made him stutter his step as he entered.

The woman lounging in the office chair with her boots on the counter didn't wear a nametag.  She did look up from her magazine -- Knives Illustrated -- but only for a second, just a cool, cursory glance to let him know that she knew he was there and also that she wasn't too bothered by it.

"Howdy there, Clarence," she drawled.

Castiel didn't look over his shoulder, this time, but he did falter to a premature stop halfway to the counter, searching the vast middle distance as he tried to quickly figure out if he had enough information to parse the greeting.  He didn't.

"My name is Castiel," he informed her cautiously, eyes lifting to meet hers over the cover of her magazine.

She turned a page.  "Knew it was something hokey like that."

"Yes, well . . . hello," he said, brow furrowing.  She turned another page and he pulled his hand down over his rough five o'clock shadow, a token from his time on the road.  He probably should have cleaned up before leaving the room, but here he was.  He stepped forward, "Excuse me--"

"You're excused," she sing-songed at him.  The magazine dropped just enough to reveal her razor-sharp grin; it was not too dissimilar to the image on the front cover.

"--I was wondering if you knew where I might find a decent Wi-Fi signal in town."  He arrived at the counter as he was speaking, and placed both his hands palms down on its surface.  When she didn't stop looking at him, he picked his hands back up and dropped them to his sides.

She went back to the magazine.  "Depends.  Business or pleasure?"

"Alright," Castiel said, defeated, hands clenching irritably at nothing, "I apologize for having bothered you.  Enjoy your evening."

He turned his back on her, and wasn't going to stop even when he heard the magazine slap closed and her boots clump to the floor, but still that's exactly what he ended up doing as she called, "Hold up, C."

It was the impromptu nickname more than anything, since hearing it inspired him to send a pinched look of consternation back in her direction, where she was now leaning towards him with her forearms planted on the counter, her straight dark hair falling over one shoulder.  "I was only having a little fun," she told him once she was sure she had secured his attention, "We don't get fresh meat like you too often around these parts, and a girl's got needs.  How could I resist?"

"That is a very forward way to speak to a customer," Castiel intoned, the dip of his head turning judgemental.  He'd seen looks like that before; his skin crawled when they were for him.  His hands balled up and flapped open again, trying to shake it off.  "Good night."

"Best bet's the Roadhouse," she told him just as he reached out to push open the door.  Again, he paused, against his better judgement, and she took that as her cue to continue, "Just head on up Main Street, you can't miss it.  If you hit the prairie, you've gone too far."

Castiel ducked his head, hiding the twitch of a small, rueful smile at the joke that slipped its way in at the last second.  "Thanks," he said, more to the half-opened door than to anyone else.

"You watch yourself out there, fresh meat," she hollered a parting warning as the door swung shut behind him, "The freaks come out at night."

---

Castiel walked back to his room to get his overcoat, taking in the rosy hues of twilight that striated the western sky dead ahead of him, chewing over the likelihood that the insouciant woman meant what she'd said.  He couldn't imagine that a small town like this would be terribly dangerous after dark, but, then again --

Stopping at the door to 401, he carefully prodded his better judgement into at least considering taking the car -- he looked at it from the corner of his eye, trying not to dwell too long on the idea that its previous owner would have left indelible personal traces behind -- and, sure enough, he wasn't ready to go digging.  Not in the box, and certainly not in the car.

Castiel gently shook out the fist he had made, swept his eyes over the brilliance of the western sky, and decided he was in the right kind of mood for a walk.

He unlocked his door, entered the room to grab his overcoat, stuffed the laptop back into the briefcase, exited again, pointed himself towards Main Street without giving the car another thought.

---

Turned out she was right about one thing, the Roadhouse was impossible to miss.

From the way the neon sign lit up the rustic wood siding of the cowboy-chic exterior, he half worried the establishment was a bar of some sort.  The windows were dark, the shades drawn down against the setting sun, so he only could only make a guess based on what the exterior looked like.  Hesitating on the sidewalk under a street lamp, Castiel squinted up at it and waged a minor civil war with himself as to whether it would be worth it to go in and find out.

He slowly turned around on the spot, in his little pool of light, casting up and down the nearly deserted street for some kind of sign that would help him choose one way or the other.  Small town Kansas didn't seem to have much going for it, in the way of nightlife; from what he could tell, the storefronts looked exclusively like the little mom-and-pops one would expect from the heartland -- the highway-adjacent Biggerson's the evident exception -- and all of these were either closed or closing.

He completed his inspection, coming face to face once again with the Roadhouse.  On the one hand, it purportedly had Wi-Fi, his current mission being to locate the same.  On the other hand, it looked like a bar, and he didn't want to walk in there with his out-of-towner face, with his uncool overcoat and his briefcase, and specifically avoid ordering alcohol.

He was just coming around to the idea that he could very well survive off the grid for a night when a pair of headlights attached to a shadow came roaring down from the north end of the street at him, the car banking into a smooth, undoubtedly illegal U-turn in the middle of the block, slinking confidently into the open space directly under Castiel's street lamp.  The engine cut off, then the lights, and then a man was ducking out of the driver's side, slamming the door shut behind him.

Castiel was stuck.  He hadn't counted on this particular type of social awkwardness, caught loitering on the street without anything to say for himself.  He averted his eyes, expecting the man to pass him by and go on with his business, but to his increasing embarrassment and frustration, the guy stepped up onto the sidewalk and shoved his keys into a pocket of his green canvas jacket and definitely didn't continue on his way.

"Coming or going?" he asked.  The voice was something of a deep growl, but the tone was friendly enough.  

Castiel looked up to be polite, or, at least, to be less weird.  "I don't know," he found himself saying.  Any chance to possibly come across as a reasonable human being was thoroughly smashed, he thought.  He couldn't talk his way out of this one, even if he tried.  Especially if he tried.  "I've only just arrived," he added.

The guy looked him up and down, not in a lecherous way, or even in a macho, sizing up the competition way; just an unguarded appraisal of his bus-rumpled appearance, the suspicious looking briefcase, the disconcerting way he was caught standing in the dark looking at the door of a place without going in.  The inspection was over in a second, and concluded with a good-natured nod and an open-handed wave that clearly said, "yeah, I figured out that much on my own."

"Well, we don't bite," the guy said aloud, slapping Castiel hard on the shoulder, making him rock from the impact and almost exactly undermining the sentiment.  He immediately turned and stepped up to the Roadhouse's door, hauling it open and beckoning back at Castiel to get his ass inside.  "C'mon, at this rate they'll be closed before you make up your mind."

If Castiel had been looking for some kind of sign, this was clearly providence's way of sending him one.

Even so, he realized he had started moving forward to accept the invitation without consciously meaning to, and, well, he had a lifetime of conditioning to thank for that.  Castiel, ever the good little soldier, taking orders at face value, instead of thinking for himself.  He frowned a little on the inside -- remembering to briefly tug a smile of thanks on the outside -- until the wave of warm, coffee-scented air hit him in the face along with the unavoidable understanding that the Roadhouse was not, in fact, a bar.

The relief of this revelation was powerful enough to enable him to put his weird little hangups back inside the box where they belonged, his outside smile going soft and honest around the edges, and he ducked his head sheepishly at the guy, who had followed him in.  Automatically angling himself towards the register, as one did one when one entered a coffee shop, he said, "I was informed there was Wi-Fi here.  Just not what 'here' was.  'The Roadhouse' sounds -- I thought perhaps it was a bar."

His honesty caught himself off-guard, uncertain as to where the need to explain himself to this stranger came from, exactly.  It was probably because he had already demonstrated the kind of small town friendliness that made Castiel feel like it would be read as rude if he didn't attempt a bit of smalltalk in return.  The guy looked like a nice enough sort of person to meet halfway; about Castiel's age, a little younger, perhaps; kind of a non-threatening good-ol'-boy with his ripped jeans, plaid flannel, and his not-quite-scruffy-not-quite-clean-cut style.  Castiel thought that maybe he could survive being social for a minute or two, with someone like this.

Instantly, this thought hit a bump in the road, as his new friend twisted a funny look at him.  "Got something against bars?"

Castiel dropped his eyes and tried to ignore his obvious misstep while he drifted into the back of the line, behind a towering mountain of a man in a black leather jacket.  Castiel wasn't short, by any stretch of the imagination, but the two men hemming him in were both taller still.  He thought about his answer to the question, flicking rapidly through the options, but wasn't able to pick one that was both simple and truthful before the guy abruptly leaned in.  This startled Castiel, who instinctively shifted away a half step, shoulder bumping up against the glass that separated him from a shiny brass espresso machine.

The guy didn't notice his discomfort, having breached Castiel's personal space to say in a stage whisper:  "If it's rough company you're worried about, nothin' to be afraid of, around here.  The real seedy joints are across town.  Ain't that right, Tiny?"

At this last, he straightened up and raised his voice some, directing the question straight past Castiel.

Castiel turned his head to see the huge leather jacket man fixing the tall canvas jacket man with a full-bodied glare.  He also, at this time, took in the man's shaved head and appreciated the twisting serpent logo coiled on the back of the jacket.  He shifted even closer to the espresso machine, clearing the space between the two men as best he could.

But "Tiny" didn't otherwise react, just turned back and stepped up to the register, boots heavy on the wooden floor.

"Wi-Fi's pretty decent here, yeah," Castiel's companion went on.  Castiel looked back to him, surprised to see him relaxed and indifferent, like he hadn't just specifically tried to antagonize a 400-pound member of a biker gang after dark.  "And the lattes are alright.  Fair warning:  your choices are pretty much either that or black coffee, those're the only things the kid can't mess up too bad."

Off the guy's nod over Castiel's shoulder, he obediently turned and saw the referenced kid -- in actuality, a young, sandy-haired man of about seventeen or eighteen -- working the espresso machine on the other side of the glass.  The milk frother hissed demonstratively for a moment, the kid's face pinched in comically serious concentration on the task, but when he shoved the arm back into the off position, he looked up to see who was watching him and broke out into one of the purest smiles Castiel had ever seen.

"Hello!" the kid said, sunnily, like Castiel was his closest friend and not a literal stranger gawking at him like a zoo animal.  The hand that had been operating the machine was summarily raised in greeting, palm forward, fingers wide.  He radiated a positively angelic energy that instantly made Castiel feel at ease, despite the anxiety of the last several minutes, somehow even despite the soul-crushing weight he'd brought with him to town.

"Hello . . . Jack," Castiel replied, after realizing he could make out the kid's name tag pinned to his apron.  Pinned to their apron, rather, as he belatedly noted the "they/them" pronoun declaration stuck on underneath the name with white label tape.  He smiled, the desire to return just a small portion of the hospitality he'd received so far rising ferociously inside him, one of the strongest emotions he'd had the pleasure of feeling in recent memory.  "I've been informed I should try one of your lattes."

He nodded at the stainless steel carafe of foamed milk in the kid's hand, and they looked down at it as if they'd forgotten it was there.  "Oh!  Yes, I suppose you should."  They poured the milk into a waiting paper cup of espresso, face contorting back into that look of supreme concentration for only as long as it took to pour, smiling back up at Castiel the second the task was done.  "I'm still learning how to make everything, but I'm getting better at the basics."

"Yeah, you are," the guy behind Castiel said, in that manner of speaking that was as aggressive as it was supportive.  Jack grinned shyly, ducking their head at the praise, and shuffled the drink off to the pick-up counter on the other side of the register.

Castiel looked back over to see the guy grinning after the kid, and a thought hit him.  "Are you their . . . parent?" he asked, tripping and catching himself on Jack's pronoun only slightly, a very jarring rush of panic hitting him in time to swerve around using the word "father," just in case gender-nonconformity ran in the family.

The . . . person met Castiel's eye and then looked away, shrugging a little.  "Oh me?  Nah.  I mean.  Sorta.  We're kind of just, looking after them, I guess you could say."

The use of the first-person plural pronoun seemed like something Castiel would pry into next, were he the prying sort.  Instead, he very, very briefly wondered what the average household looked like in Lebanon, Kansas, these days, or if he'd just stumbled into the exception on accident.

A hand was extended his way, along with a name.  "Dean," Castiel was told as he accepted the handshake, "He/him, in case you were wondering."

Castiel let out an inward sigh of relief, and the guy winked before adding:  "Aquarius.  Stones, not Beatles.  Star Wars and Star Trek, but not the garbage that came out after the nineties."  Dean let Castiel's hand go with a chewed-on smile and something of a self-deprecating eyebrow wag.  "That's basically all the important stuff you have to know about me up front."

"Castiel," he returned, "And . . . I am also a man."

Dean snorted a short little breath at that, eyes bright.  He rubbed his chin, scratching through the close-trimmed stubble.  "Castiel, huh?"

Castiel pressed his lips together and took a moment to take stock of the state of his shoes, squaring himself for the inevitable question about his uncommon name, but for once it didn't come.  Dean didn't have the chance to ask it.  When Castiel glanced up, Dean was looking over Castiel's shoulder in the direction of the register, all traces of his friendly disposition replaced by a cold scowl.

As one did, Castiel, too, turned to follow Dean's gaze, searching out the source of his sudden displeasure.  For a second he assumed it had something to do with Jack, maybe getting into some difficult situation with a customer, but at a glance he saw that he only had it half right.  Instead of Jack, it was the young woman behind the register, who pulled her wrist out of Tiny's pawlike grasp as Castiel watched.

Castiel's throat closed up, his second-hand anxiety over the situation momentarily flooring him.  Embarrassed, he looked away, out over the sparsely populated cafe, everyone he saw slowly doing the same:  turning back to their screens and their friends, pretending nothing had happened.

Everyone but Dean, Castiel saw as he finally looked back up at him.  Dean was still watching Tiny closely, his brow drawn down and his mouth set in a firm line.  He flicked his eyes down to Castiel when he caught him looking, and did a stuttered double take when he realized he had accidentally leveled that glare at him.

Dean relaxed his expression into something more neutral, obviously seeing the stress on Castiel's face; while Dean was clearly angered by Tiny's overreach, Castiel couldn't help but project a grim ache that he didn't want to name.  Dean's head tilted, as if he was slowly cottoning on to the depth of Castiel's discomfort the longer he looked at him, and Castiel saw his jaw clench the moment before they both looked sharply back over at the register, hearing the woman's voice rise, frustrated and disgusted, over the country twang of the canned music pumping through the coffee shop's speakers.

"You kiss your mama with that mouth?"  The young woman had taken a full step back into the space behind the counter, dodging out of the way of Tiny's reach.  Castiel could see fire in her eyes, and barely registered Jack standing nervously on her other side.

Tiny laughed, a rolling chuckle that filled Castiel's gut with acid.  The huge man leaned up against the counter, shoving a shoulder as far as it would go into the open space next to the register, and curled his hand around the far edge of the counter.  "Why, you jealous?  How 'bout you pucker up, sweetcheeks, let me show you what you're missing."

In an instant, the nerves and disgust flushed out of Castiel's system, and in its place a white-hot righteous anger swirled up.  His hands twitched, settling for fists, and he took a lurching step forward, his briefcase swinging roughly into his leg, the emotion spilling out of him in a growl of "Hey, asshole--"

"Yeah, alright--" Dean growled at the same time, taking the same step forward, bringing him even with Castiel, the two men suddenly a solid wall staring daggers into Tiny's back.

"Stay out of this, Dean," the young woman said, fierce.  The tone in her voice caused Jack to flinch, snatching back the reassuring hand they'd been tentatively reaching her way.

Tiny heaved himself off the counter, turning to face them slowly, deliberately, letting them appreciate his size and giving them ample time to reconsider the hill they might be about to die on.  Castiel's chin went up, eyes narrowed.  At his side, Dean sniffed and thumbed his nose, aggressively nonchalant.

A devil-may-care smile on his face, Dean put one arm wide.  "No can do, Jo.  There's a quick way to handle huge, steaming piles of human garbage like our friend Tiny here," he said, making stabbing motions with his hand at the man in question, "and I'd hate to see you lose your job over a broken jaw."

Castiel glanced sharply up at Dean, trying to gauge the realistic chances of an all-out brawl going down right here between the novelty mugs and the last of the day's homemade baked goods.  Lebanon, Kansas was quickly proving to be something other than the sleepy, middle of nowhere hamlet he had assumed it would be.  

In fairness, though, he had been warned that the freaks came out at night.

Dean didn't exactly look ready for a fight, though, loose-limbed and calm, fixing Tiny with a cocky grin that was daring the biker to make the first move.  Castiel forced his own shoulders down, his fist to relax around the handle of the briefcase he was gripping like a weapon.  He cut his eyes over to Tiny, who was equally not rising to the bait, just sneering at them for what he was reading as biteless bark.

"Like to see you try, pretty boy," Tiny said, digging in his heels.

Castiel frowned, seeing that the situation had ground into a stalemate before it had even started, two immovable objects sizing each other up, both content with the fact that the one who either struck first or walked away first would make himself the de facto loser of the conflict, one way or another.  Even so, Castiel strongly felt that neither of these two would be the type to walk away.  He raised a hand, palm out, and tried to press some sense into the moment before one of them exhausted their patience and decided to throw a match onto this powderkeg.

"No one has to try anything," he warned, making sure Dean knew he was included in the list of people encouraged to stand down, "Let's all conduct ourselves as civilized people.  Please, just leave the young woman alone, let her do her job in peace."

Tiny peered down at him and made it clear it wasn't about to back off just because a stranger in a rumpled trenchcoat asked him to play nice.

Dean, meanwhile, licked his bottom lip and looked like he might actually be considering his options.  He nodded, ducking his head as though coming to an overdue realization.

"See, I know Tiny's mom," Dean said, raising his eyebrows at Castiel.  

Castiel dropped his own right back at him, a suspicious squint pinching his face as he felt in his gut that the situation was about to spin off the axle in some unforeseen way, despite his best efforts to prevent that exact outcome.

Dean went on, unperturbed, sliding one hand into his pocket as he half turned away from Tiny, like he was just carrying on their friendly chat from before, like they didn't have a behemoth of an audience listening in.  "And I know she would be appalled -- shocked, even -- if she found out what her son was up to when she ain't looking.  Sweet old Martha, she's been in hospice for what, six weeks?  Seven?"  

He swiveled suddenly and jabbed his free hand at Tiny--  "Please, correct me if I'm wrong--"  Back to Castiel, he tapped his own chest twice to demonstrate-- "The ol' ticker's just not what it used to be, or so I hear.  Can't imagine what a bit of bad news might do to her delicate constitution."

As he said this last part, Dean's arm fell, and with it his cheery facade.  He rolled his head Tiny's direction, offering him one of the coldest, meanest looks Castiel had ever seen on a person.

All seven feet of Tiny was now quivering with a quiet kind of rage, his boiled egg of a head going pink as he struggled to hold it in, to not lose the game of chicken he and Dean were playing.  "You're not gonna tell my Ma nothing, you hear me?"

Dean exploded forward a half step, a finger viciously stabbing the air in the vicinity of Tiny's face.  "You stop being a dick, and I'll have nothing to tell," he roared.

"Dean!" Jo shouted over the top of him, slamming her hands down on the counter.

Everyone in the coffee shop flinched.  Castiel felt himself hang his head, feeling the sting as if he himself had been scolded.  But he'd made himself a part of it, stepped in and got involved, hadn't been able to prevent escalation.  He looked out of the corner of his eye at Jo, thinking that maybe he should apologize, but she was just glaring at Dean with hard eyes and a furious shake of her head.

"Out," she ordered.

Dean ignored the way she obviously meant him, and swung an open grin Tiny's way, canines and tongue showing.  "You heard the little lady."

Jo grit her teeth.  "Both of you, out.  We don't need your kind of trouble here."

Something about what she'd said or how she said it got Dean's attention.  He dropped his arms to his sides with a slap of canvas on canvas, twisting her way with a schoolboy pout pulling down his face.  "C'mon, Jo.  You know I didn't mean it.  You know me.  I would never--"

"Save it," she cut him off.  "Jack's shift ends in twenty-five minutes.  Go wait in the car."

There was a second where Dean gaped, fish out of water, at the order, but the cool, commanding look that came with it forcibly shut his mouth with an audible click and he reared back, bumping into Castiel slightly.  "Alrighty, then," he huffed, stomping the wrong way through the line and on towards the door without looking back.  

Castiel watched his boots retreat over the polished wood of the floor, heard the bang of the door being slammed open with more force than absolutely necessary, then tilted his head to catch Jo giving Tiny the same icy treatment.

"What are you waiting for, then, an invitation?  Go on, get.  And if you try something like that again, trust me, I won't bother with your Ma.  I'll go get mine."  She smiled, sweet and sharp, leaned forward over the counter, right into Tiny's personal space, to make sure her point wasn't missed.  "And we can see how many bones she can break before the Sheriff hauls her off your dead body."

An ominous kind of tension straightened Castiel's shoulders, surprised at Jo's candid threat, doubtful that hers would work where Dean's had failed.  After a moment, though, Tiny heaved his bulk away from the counter, gave Castiel a dirty look, and similarly made his inglorious retreat into the night.

Castiel wondered what was going to happen now between the two men, whether they were going to carry on in the street or just back off to lick their wounds until their next meeting.  He hoped Dean had sense enough to actually get in the car, at least.

"Next!"

Distracted from the errant thought of the well-being of a near stranger, Castiel turned to see Jo smiling at him from behind the register, the picture of award-winning customer service, and nothing like the stone-cold demon who had seconds ago threatened to have her mother bludgeon a customer to death.  He stepped up to place his order, thoroughly cowed.

"I apologize for the scene, for my part in it," he told her quietly as he leaned to one side to set the briefcase on the floor at his feet, reaching for his wallet.  "You clearly didn't need us to butt in, but still, I hope you're alright."

She waved his apology away, shaking her head.  "Nothing to be sorry for, it's fine.  Small town like this, hard for some folk to avoid bumping into the folk they shouldn't be bumping into.  It happens, you handle it, you move on.  What can I get started for you tonight?"

Castiel offered her a small smile, feeling it press a little tight around his eyes, his misplaced guilt swirling harder at her need to project such a tough exterior.  It was unfortunate and unfair that the world demanded the thickest skins from some people more than others, and his heart ached in a vague, nameless way, wishing there was something he could do to alleviate the need for someone so young to have constructed such a defensive worldview.

Off her expectant look, he willed himself to remember what he ought to be doing in the here and now.  He gave the menu board on the back wall a cursory review, not really consuming its contents in any meaningful way, until he looked down and caught Jack's eye from where the eager barista floated at a respectful distance between Jo and the espresso machine.

Castiel smiled, this time with notable ease as he remembered Dean's earlier suggestion.  "A small latte, please.  It came highly recommended."

"You got it," Jo nodded, punching the order into the register and pulling a cup from the stack.  "Your name?"  She looked up at him, reaching into a mug with a missing handle to fish out a Sharpie.

"Uh, Castiel," he supplied, and spelled it for her benefit, just in case.

"Castiel," she repeated, as most did when confronted with his name for the first time, trying it out for themselves, "That's got kind of a Biblical ring to it, doesn't it?  Don't tell me you're some kind of guardian angel?"  

"Hardly," Castiel murmured, dropping his gaze to focus on pulling the correct currency out of his wallet.

Jo passed the cup with his name on it to Jack, who immediately took it to the espresso machine and got to work, that same serious look of concentration commandeering their entire face for the duration.

"Anything else for you today?" she asked.  

It was one of those scripted niceties that Castiel truly appreciated about by-the-book social interactions.  A perfect sequitur that spared him the effort of trying to come up with one on his own.  "Do you have a password for the Wi-Fi?"

She nodded, slipping a business card sized piece of paper from a loose stack next to the register, and handed it over in trade for the cash he gave her in return.  As she punched open the till and dug around for his change, he glanced down at the code.  It read "N@turomDem0nto," which, as far as Wi-Fi passwords went, was certainly one.

The till banged shut with a ring, Jo handing him back his change.  Seeing his bemused look as he inspected the hotspot info, she explained, "Sorry, I know it's a little out there.  Our IT guy, Ash, he's a bit of a supernatural freak."

"I see," Castiel said agreeably, though he felt fairly certain that there was some additional piece of trivia he was missing to be able to recognize the significance of the unintelligible string of letters and numbers.  He put the paper into his pocket, dumped the loose change from his palm into the tip jar, and retrieved his briefcase.  "Thank you."

Jo's eyebrows came down, not unkindly, as her lips pursed in baffled amusement.  "No problem," she laughed, shaking her head at him.  "Jack'll have your drink out in a minute."  She waved him in the direction of the pickup counter, and Castiel went gratefully on his way, looking forward to the upcoming stretch of time where he didn't have to make small talk, or try to avoid physical altercations, or accidentally say "thank you" after tipping.

The remaining patrons of the Roadhouse appeared to have cleared out since he had last looked, but whether this was due to the late hour or the recent potential for violence, he couldn't be sure.  Castiel thought about Dean waiting for Jack out in that beast of a car; thought about Tiny (or men like him) lurking out on the streets.  

He pulled out his phone, noting the time as he thumbed to the Wi-Fi settings.  Again, the hotspot listing was sparse, just the one named after the Roadhouse -- finally, full bars -- and, to his muted surprise, "Big D's iPhone."

He was still looking curiously at the cafe's curtained windows, in the direction where he knew that sleek black muscle car with the animal growl was parked under a street lamp, when a bright voice chimed behind him:  "Here you go!"

Sliding his phone back into his pocket, Castiel turned to face Jack, finding a bloom of warmth filling the hollow of his chest to see them sliding his latte over with an exceedingly proud look on their face, certain of a job well done.  Right on the drink's tail, Castiel was surprised to see a small plate with a piece of apple pie being pushed his way as well.

He held up his hand to stop or question the freebie, thinking he hadn't done anything today to have earned getting rewarded with pie, but Jo popped up at Jack's side and gave him one of those looks he already recognized as meaning he wouldn't be allowed to decline.  His bottom lip pursed, he reached out and obediently pulled the plate the rest of the way over with one finger.

"At closing time, we either have trash all the leftover perishables or give 'em away," Jo explained.  She nodded down at the plate with something of a wicked grin, "Normally I'd be packing this up for Jack to take home for Dean, but here's hoping I can teach him something by revoking his pie privileges for one night."

Castiel's eyes went wide, and his hand flew off the rim of the plate as though it had burned him.  Before he could figure out a way to articulate how uncomfortable it made him to know he was stealing someone's pie, Jack laughed and shook their head.

"No, it's okay, really.  Sam's always saying Dean needs to watch what he eats.  So, you're helping!"  They chirped this last bit with a scrunch of the eyes and a jerky shrug of their shoulders.  Jo backed the assertion, a tilt of her head and a jag of her brow to say Castiel really didn't have the room to argue with either of them on this.

"Ah," Castiel said, eyeing the pie like it was a plate full of gold, feeling completely unworthy, "If that's the case. . ."

He looked up, met Jo's and then Jack's eyes, and told them solemnly, "I appreciate it."

Jack's endearing smile crinkled onto their face again, and Jo patted them on the arm.

"Hey, we're all set here," she said to Jack, "Why don't you clock out a little early, okay?  I won't tell my mom."

Castiel kept his small smile to himself, busied himself shifting his briefcase to his other hand as Jack eagerly tripped off to head out for the night.  Still, he lingered a little at the pickup counter, not missing the guarded way Jo eyed the front door, which gave nothing away as to what kind of trouble might still be skulking in the night on the other side.

She caught him noticing, which was fine, because his thoughts were running along similar tracks.  It gave him the cue to share his own.  "Um," he started, glancing away, "Would it be a problem if I stayed until closing?  There's, uh, no Wi-Fi at the motel."

When he looked back over at her, shy, she was giving him a soft eye roll with her mouth screwed up to one side to hide some kind of smile.  She chewed on the inside of her cheek a moment, then looked heavenward with a good-natured sigh.

"You know, for a guy who swears he's not a guardian angel--"

Behind her, Jack, who had traded their apron for a colorful windbreaker, swung through the half-door at the far end of the counter, on the other side of the espresso machine, and called out a chipper, "Good night, Jo!  Good night, sir, hope you enjoy your drink!"

Oh.  Castiel hastily lifted the paper cup, Jo waving her own goodbye as Jack trotted across the shop floor towards the exit.  He took a sip of the latte, cringing a little to discover that it was still far too hot to drink without caution; even so, he smiled at Jack and gestured with the cup.  "It's very good, thank you."

He was treated to another of those full-face, joyous smiles, and then Jack was out the door and Castiel was left alone with Jo, his scalding latte, and his unearned pie.  He thumbed the lip of the plastic to-go lid, only half-certain she had approved of him sticking around now that she was on her own behind the counter.  For all she knew, he could be just as rotten as any of them, just biding his time until--

"Please help yourself to our Wi-Fi for as long as you'd like," Jo told him, fixing him with a kind, if ever-so-slightly bemused, look.  

He nodded his thanks, and, using the bottom of his drink, shifted the pie plate over to the edge of the counter where he caught it in the fingers of the hand already tucked under the handle of the briefcase, maxing out his awkwardness in doing so.  Jo was biting her lip, watching the juggling act unfold before her, but she didn't otherwise comment.  With a short smile of parting, Castiel fled -- cautiously -- to a small table at one of the shaded windows, far from Jo and close to the door.

As he went, the sound of a car engine, startling in both how loud and how familiar it seemed to him, rumbled up through the coffee shop's backdrop of picked guitars and singing fiddles.  By the time Castiel took a seat, it had already roared off into the distance.  He was glad its driver seemed not to have run into any further trouble, after all.

Drink settled, pie settled, Castiel himself settled, he set the briefcase on the floor beside him and clicked it open just enough to drag the laptop out from the pocket. He slid it onto the table between his other items, determined to connect to the Wi-Fi and check his email, to do the one thing he had ventured out to do, even if only to say he had.

As suspected, he now saw no trace of "Big D's iPhone" nearby, and carefully punched in the access code to the Roadhouse's network.  The computer connected without fanfare.  Dutifully, he clicked on his email app and watched the logo splash pop up over the muted periwinkle of his desktop wallpaper.

While the program loaded up, he reached out and pulled the pie over and dug a chunk out of it with the fork that had been so kindly provided.  The first bite reminded him that he hadn't eaten since Kansas City, and his focus narrowed to the singular task of slicing and chewing until there was nothing left but crumbs stuck to the cinnamon-sugary tracks his fork made as it scraped over the plate's inexplicable cowboy boot pattern.

Returning the plate and fork to the table with a sigh, Castiel took up his latte, now sufficiently cooled, and sipped this while flicking his fingers over the laptop's trackpad, disinterestedly scrolling through his inbox.  The loss of a few of his taste buds notwithstanding, he found he was able to appreciate the quality of Jack's handiwork, and he felt retroactively absolved for the preemptive high marks he'd given.

He stopped scrolling.  Not that he'd been paying attention to the task anyway, but thinking about the young person's ineffable good cheer and the mercurial temper of their guardian had him staring at the curtain as if he could see straight through it, into the street and the night, imagining the shine of the street lamp off the hood of that dangerous-looking car.

He drank the rest of his latte while absorbed in the expanse of his mind's eye, the limitless vistas of the day's bus ride peppered with half-remembered moments of the evening so far,  impressions of the short stretch of Main Street Lebanon he'd traversed, the faces of strangers blending one into the next into the next.  There was one face in particular that he kept circling back to, though, and one moment that was sharper than the rest.

Standing under that street lamp, waiting.  Waiting for--

"Sorry to interrupt," Jo said, tentative, seeming to materialize at Castiel's table.

He whipped his head away from the window -- had he really just been staring blankly at the curtain this whole time?  What must she think -- and pushed back his chair to try to get with the program.  "Sorry -- you've probably been waiting--"

She laughed and held up her hands, and he slowed his frantic sweeping of his belongings from the table.  "Whoa, there.  I was just gonna give you a five-minute heads up, is all.  Didn't mean to spook you."

Castiel perched the briefcase he had snagged from the floor onto his vacated chair, and gently slid the laptop back inside.  "I'm fine," he said, snapping the clasp closed, "please don't let me hold you up."

"No worries," she told him, and when he darted his eyes over to her, she was giving him that slightly amused, slightly puzzled look she'd been giving him since he walked in.  She cleared his plate and cup from the table and made off with them.  He picked up his briefcase and pushed in the chair, standing purposelessly there at its side.

She looked back over her shoulder at him, seeing him not leaving.  "Five minutes," she said again, "and then I'm going to let you walk me to my car, okay?  You seem sweet, and I just can't help feeling like you'll have an aneurysm or something if I walk out there alone."

"Sorry," Castiel repeated.  He frowned, suddenly very invested in the stitching on his briefcase handle.  "I've overstepped again."

Jo pushed open the swinging half-door of the counter and regarded him from across the coffee shop floor.  "I'll let it slide, this once.  Just don't make a habit of it," she told him with mock-gravitas, fighting back a telling smile before disappearing into the back.

It was a joke, he could tell, something to dispel the awkward energy Castiel had fomented up around himself.  It worked, just a little, and he took a deep breath and let it out in a quiet sigh at himself.  Anyway, he could promise her that, and easily.  He didn't know exactly how long he'd end up spending in Lebanon, Kansas, but it wasn't like he was planning on sticking around forever.

He shuffled his feet, waiting on Jo's return, and willed himself to imagine opening that sealed box.  Digging out the keys to the wide, boxy, gold-colored Lincoln Continental.  Climbing into the driver's seat and watching this speck of a town vanish in the rearview mirror.

He wondered what tape would be playing in the deck, or maybe what radio station it was still set to.  What the scent of the air freshener hung over the mirror was, and whether the built-in ashtrays needed to be emptied.  What he might find forgotten under the seats.

All at once, a full-body shudder rolled over him, overwhelmed by all these questions with answers he couldn't yet face.  

"Ready?"

He looked up as Jo crossed to the door and flicked the bank of switches to shut off the overhead lights, leaving them both shadows lit faintly by the glow of the displays on the equipment behind the counter.

Ready?  Not in the slightest.

"After you," he murmured, reaching out to push the door open.

---

Castiel showered with military efficiency, the rushing water just about drowning out his empty thoughts.

He changed into his sleepwear mechanically, put himself into the bed, and flicked on the television because there was nothing else left to do.  The day was finally catching up to him, and his body ached as it reluctantly gave itself over to the support of the mattress.  His bones felt heavy, his eyes raw.  He flipped channels without comprehending anything he saw on the tiny screen.

Maybe it was the jangle of espresso in his veins, or maybe it was his internal clock's confusion regarding what time zone he'd ended up in, or maybe it was his white-knuckled refusal to find out what his subconscious had in store for him, but it was several long, dull, droning hours of late-night soaps and infomercials before Castiel finally let go and allowed himself to sleep.

[almaasi]

GISHWHES 2017 List Of Items

Yes, this archive post is a whole year late. Don’t judge me.

In 2017 the hunt ran from August 5th to the 12th, and winners went to Hawaii with Misha. (Misha scared everyone by implying it was The Last Ever Hunt, when it was actually just rebranding.) Under the cut: The entire item list from 2017, including item numbers, point values, and deleted items.

[ see also: 2011 list // 2012 list // 2013 list // 2014 list // 2015 list // 2016 list ]

Disclaimer: I am not personally affiliated with Misha Collins or any of the organisers of GISHWHES. This blog post is not official. And yes, I am allowed to post it.

#1 / PHOTO / 66 POINTS / Do you live near (or within a fun road trip’s length of) some sand dunes or a beach? If so, the time has come to fulfill your destiny. Make a massive portrait (must be larger than 20 square meters - the larger the better) of either someone who inspires you, or a message of hope beautifully written in sand. Use a drone to capture footage, if helpful. Make sure you are not working on protected or ecologically sensitive dunes.

#2 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 20 POINTS / There was a hobby or talent that you used to do when you were younger that you stopped doing for whatever reason. Do it again. Now.

#3 / PHOTO / 52 POINTS / Pancake art has come a long way, and the art form doesn’t get the respect it deserves. Let’s see pancake art of Guernica, Judith Slaying Holofernes, The Weeping Woman, anything by Hieronymus Bosch., or another famous work. (You may not do the Mona Lisa or anything abstract.)

#4 / PHOTO / 62 POINTS / As anyone who reads “Cosmopolitan” magazine knows, bohemian eco-chic weddings are all the rage. Let’s see a wedding dress made from recycled office paper.

#5 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 42 POINTS / Nobody likes elevator music in an elevator - unless it’s flute or pan flute music played by a wood nymph. (We must see unsuspecting passengers in the elevator with the wood nymph.)

#6 / VIDEO / 19 POINTS / Re-enact the experience of your birth, using (only) shadow puppets.

#7 / VIDEO / 44 POINTS / (Up to 2 minutes.) You love your grandparents, or your great-grandparents, but you've never heard their stories. Get one of them to tell you about the two most transformative experiences of their early life, before they turned 30. These must be experiences that shaped them into the people they are today. They may be difficult situations or lucky ones, but they must be transformative. Subject(s) must be more than 80 years old.

#8 / PHOTO / 82 POINTS / The year is 2021. Of all the unique and amazing human specimens on Earth, it was hard for the aliens to choose which ones to collect, but your team stood out as being excessively weird & worth “analysis". Your entire team was abducted and put into an alien specimen box. In grid form, show each member of your team along with a card explaining where they got you (city, country) and a word stating what special characteristic makes you unique.

#9 / PHOTO / 29 POINTS / I can assure you, THAT has never been frozen in jello before! How did you manage to do that?!

#10 / PHOTO / 51 POINTS / Pizza was invented in Italy in 997 AD to honor the Queen Consort, Queen Margherita. The next significant event in Italian history was the start of the Renaissance Period in the 14th century, which spawned a revival in art, architecture, science and learning. Let’s celebrate these two seminal moments in Italian history. Bake a Pizza decorated as a Renaissance painting that would make the Old Masters proud.

#11 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 82 POINTS / There are many old ghost towns (Note that Little Beaver Town on the list has been leveled. We're not sure what happened to the ghosts but they may be smaller/flatter) around the world. I’ve been told, however, that almost all of these are fake and do not contain real ghosts. I refuse to believe this. Help me prove them wrong. Let’s see ghosts (at least 6) doing typical small-town activities (shopping, dropping stuff off in the mailbox, porch sitting, walking ghost dogs, as crossing guards and school kids, etc.) in one of the actual ghost towns at the link above (or in another legitimately publicized ghost town). Provide a caption to your image or video with the name of the ghost town , and the State or Province and Country you’re in.

#12 / PHOTO / 29 POINTS / Many of us have lost pets in our lifetime. As a memorial to a loved pet that is now frolicking in the clouds chasing or sniffing whatever it was that pet liked to chase/sniff, write a poem or haiku about that loved one, or create a small shrine in nature comprised of items the pet loved and a photo of him or her.

#13 / PHOTO / 41 POINTS / (Side by side) A child drawing of their idea of happiness. Then, make it happen.

#14 / PHOTO / 48 POINTS / Over the years gishwhes has always been a supporter of first responders (firemen, paramedics, ER medics, nurses, police, etc.). Let’s give them one last treatment of a proper gishwhes “THANK YOU!” Find your nearest and dearest first responders and bring them The Most Epic Cookies or Pastries the World Has Ever Seen (MECOPWHES).

#15 / PHOTO / 23 POINTS / Groucho Marx a piece of fruit. No, we don’t know what this means either, but we’re excited to see what you come up with.

#16 / VIDEO / 29 POINTS / (Up to 2 minutes.) Take your parent back to the place where they lived when they were 10. Find someone they knew from then and ask them to recall a shared memory.

#17 / PHOTO / 69 POINTS / Spicy Art! Using the spices you have in your spice cupboard, make a picture of your favorite (1) comic book cover, or (2) cartoon character. Either submit it alone, or as a side-by-side image comparison.

#18 / PHOTO / 63 POINTS / Create or provide “gishwhes” welcome blankets (if it’s cold) or cold water and snacks (if it’s hot) for newly arriving immigrants… anywhere on the planet. Here’s some inspiration for you.

#19 / PHOTO / 38 POINTS / (Side-by-side image) A photo of your pet and a photo of the portrait of your pet that you have made from their own food and treats.

#20 / PHOTO / 41 POINTS / This family’s toys get into sweet, crazy escapades at night while the kids are sleeping. Your family’s toys make that family’s toys look like do-gooders. Let’s see what happened with your family’s toys while you slept last night.

#21 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 41 POINTS / Let’s see the world famous once-every-3000-years “Spectral Olympics”.

#22 / PHOTO / 50 POINTS / We finally have a confirmed sighting of a mythical beast from urban legends (Bigfoot, Nessie, Yeti, etc.) suffering the effects of climate change.

#23 / PHOTO / 39 POINTS / This morning, my daughter, Maison reported having seen a “moon fairy” while I was sleeping last night. As you know, the rarely-seen moon fairies are mischievous, nocturnal creatures who participate in synchronized, representational flight. Using a long exposure and flashlights (or other movable light sources) photograph these elusive beasts.

#24 / PHOTO / 43 POINTS / She wore a raspberry beret… Wear a beret made out of raspberries as you shop in a second-hand store.

#25 / PHOTO / 56 POINTS / Wombat poop is shaped like little bricks. Sounds like the perfect building material for a tiny house! Show us! If we can figure out the architectural style you chose from your structure - bonus points! You’ll probably have to go to a local zoo to ask for collections of this building material. Enjoy your visit while you’re there. Your image must contain a caption that shares a little known fact about wombats.

#26 / VIDEO / 101 POINTS / (Create an old-school STOP MOTION film - up to 1 minute.) A Romeo and Juliet story... Two young virile socks (unmatched) meeting, falling in love, being kept apart and finally ending tragically.

#27 / PHOTO / 48 POINTS / The Internet has brought us all closer together, so this should be really easy: find someone from one of the 10 smallest countries in the world. Have them send you a forced perspective photo of something very small that makes that object look huge in front of a famous public landmark or historical site in that country. Caption the photo with “Big things happen in the tiny nation of [insert country name].” Teams may not share submissions with other teams, so make sure your tiny country helper isn’t helping someone else.

#28 / PHOTO / 58 POINTS / Finger-painting is often thought of as unsophisticated and associated with preschool. But we know it can be deployed for much loftier purposes. Prove the art historians and elitists wrong by finger painting a sophisticated mural with complex messaging about an important global issue on the wall of a classroom. You may want to get a pre-schooler or two to help just to make sure you’re doing it right!

#29 / PHOTO / 37 POINTS / It is either winter or summer where you are. (If it is not, please contact our support so we can send NASA to find you.) There’s something you love to do outdoors in the winter or summer where you live. Do the activity you love to do in the opposite season that you are in.

#30 / PHOTO / 41 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! NEW LEASH ON LIFE USA adopts otherwise unadoptable dogs and sends them through a unique training program. Shelter pets rarely get any attention and millions are put down each year. Many times this can be avoided if people on the Interwebs (who would like and could responsibly own a pet) were to see how cute, available, lonely and cuddly they are. Let’s save a pet or two (or thousands). Grab a friend or two and visit a shelter. Spend some time with one or more of the pets there. Post a selfie of your favorite pet looking for a “forever home” on Twitter (tagging @NewLeashUSA) or Instagram (tagging @NewLeashOnLifeUSA), using hashtag #adoptmeplease, and the social media handle or name of the shelter (so people can contact them). Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post link in the comment field of the submit page. // UPDATED: Updated tags and social accounts. (Original said “on Twitter or Instagram, tagging @NewLeashUSA”.)

#31 / PHOTO / 44 POINTS / You’ll find all you need to complete this item here: https://yung.cloud/index.php?a=track&id=29451

#32 / PHOTO / 50 POINTS / Visit a local bakery or food market. Get them to donate still-edible items to a women’s shelter. Speak to the women’s shelter first to make sure they will accept donations like this. Submit an image of you at the women’s shelter donating the food items. // UPDATE NOTE: Please don't take images that include any of the residents in the background out of respect to their safety & privacy.

#33 / PHOTO / 73 POINTS / From @gishwhes twitter feed: Everyone knows the most ticklish parts of planes are on the undersides of the wings (or "wing pits", to use proper aircraft terminology). Let’s see the wing pits on a full-sized airplane. You can go true bohemian, decorative, or high and tight groomer - but it must really look like (or be) hair to count.

#34 / PHOTO / 89 POINTS / As this is likely the last year of gishwhes we should probably do something to memorialize it. A lot of folks have been saying, “Save gishwhes!” But we say, “Shave “gishwhes”... into the back of your head.” Try to match the amazing logo that Olivia Desianti formed way back when - which we still use today. Bonus points if you include the current or a former gishwhes hybrid mascot in your masterpiece. The same design shaved into a thick matt of back or chest hair would be an acceptable substitute.

#35 / PHOTO / 44 POINTS / Hand a bouquet of flowers (or a single flower) to a person leaving a house of worship that is not your religion. For example, if you are a Christian, you could hand a bouquet of flowers to someone leaving a mosque. If you’re Jewish, hand flowers to someone at a Christian church, etc. With the flowers, attach a note saying something in your own words, but to the effect of: “I may not worship in the same building as you, and I may not pray to the same prophets, but I am grateful to be sharing this planet with you in peace.”

#36 / PHOTO / 23 POINTS / The dewey decimal system has long been responsible for keeping good books apart— books that clearly deserve to spend a life together on library shelves. For that matter, it seems so many libraries go out of their way to keep perfectly good literary companions apart as they separate fact from fiction, biography from archaeology, science fiction from politics. Be the matchmaker literature needs and get creative at your local library or bookstore. Show the spines of at least six books together in a library or bookstore (the more titles the better) the titles of which create the perfect oxymoronic sentence or phrase. - Monica Duff

#37 / PHOTO / 92 POINTS / No one talks about the fact that the destruction of the Death Star put thousands of Stormtroopers out of work. Luckily the Empire has a pretty robust social safety net and most of them have been retrained and placed in new jobs, the majority of which have been in the transportation sector. Let’s see a stormtrooper driving/flying a large passenger vehicle. Must be for mass transit, not just a car or a van. A subway, train, bus, ferry, plane, etc.

#38 / PHOTO / 43 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Pick a celebrity social media image post (or an advertisement) and recreate it with a subtle twist like Celeste Barber does here. Tweet, Instagram or FB post your image side-by-side with the original image, “#embracereality @gishwhes” and your team name. (You may also tag or mention the celebrity or brand you are satirizing.) Submit the image you take side-by-side with the original one, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

#39 / PHOTO / 29 POINTS / You’ve heard of Cabbage Patch Kids, Garbage Pail Kids, and the Pacific Garbage patch. Let’s see a Great Pacific Garbage Patch Kid, (a cabbage-patch kid made from garbage you pick up from your local beach or lakefront), complete with adoption certificate.

#40 / VIDEO / 51 POINTS / (Up to 30 seconds.) THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT!. Have a full church choir sing Carry on My Wayward Son while wearing dental cheek retractors. Please make sure that the video shows some of the singers’ faces up close. Then, share the video via twitter with the band Kansas (@kansasband) with @mishacollins @gishwhes.” Submit the video on our site but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. - Nicki Bentley-Colthart

#41 / PHOTO / 21 POINTS / Show us your own personal “Stairway to Heaven” -Dylan Cacador

#42 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 48 POINTS / You ever heard of “pond dipping”? “river bugging”? Neither have we - but let’s not let that stop us. Invent and show off your own *SAFE* summer wet, wild and messy activity and caption it with a clever name.

#43 / PHOTO / 39 POINTS / Never judge a book by its cover… or bread by its shape. Bake bread or cookies into the shape of something you would DEFINITELY not want to eat. (We hate to have to say this every year, but pornographic pastries will result in docked points.)

#44 / VIDEO / 56 POINTS / (Time-lapse up to 20 seconds.) A snail (or similarly VERY slow insect or worm) crossing a path or going up a wall. Put or stick objects in its path so it has to change directions multiple times. Then have it go through some “winner” gates at the end of its arduous trek. To make it a gripping adventure, you’ve dropped frames and turned this into a fast-paced adventure and set it to 1980s video game music, complete with a grand finale sound at the end when it makes it through the gates.

#45/ PHOTO / 72 POINTS / You may not be aware, but leather-clad, tattoo-covered biker clubs love to hang out and play in those inflatable bouncy castles. Catch them in the act!

#46 / PHOTO / 29 POINTS / THE FINAL “KALE” ART. (Please note that per Commandment #4 of the 2017 Hunt, this word and material as a Hunt item is not permitted. We are aware of this. That being said, we do not care. You still may not use the word “kale”. Henceforth, it shall be called [REDACTED] BUT you may use it as a material for this item.) Therefore, take a SINGLE glorious piece of [REDACTED] and, using whatever adornments or other decoratives, clipping patterns, etc., create a stunning, museum worthy piece of art that shall then be showcased (and submitted as such) as an ornamental headpiece on you.

#47 / PHOTO / 63 POINTS / Your strict neighborhood HOA (Homeowners’ Association) got replaced by a better HOA: the Hopeful Optimist’s Association. They’ve decided that your lawn isn’t quite up to regulations. Get your front yard up to snuff by building a large-scale, jaw-dropping sculpture or structure dedicated to Hope. Make it so magnificent that motorists backup & park to gaze at its beauty. (Conversely, it could be that YOUR neighborhood HOA got replaced by the Horrible Organization for Awfulness... You get where we're going with this, right?)

#48 / PHOTO / 48 POINTS / As most people know, roosters enjoy a good sunrise. But other farm animals enjoy sunrises and sunsets, too. Let's see a photo of you, some friends or companions (such as your dog), and a sheep, horse, cow, or other non-rooster barnyard animal, watching the sun rise or set together. Bonus points if the spectacular skies are reflected in water in front of you.

#49 / PHOTO / 37 POINTS / There’s something important that your local or national politicians are not attending to properly. Stand in front of something that represents the issue/right/minority group/etc. that you care about and that your politicians are not adequately protecting and hold a large, hand-written sign with a message to the powers that be. Tweet this image to an elected official with the power to do something to help tagged “#gishwhesrights”. Submit the image and a link to your tweet in the comments.

#50 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 51 POINTS / Have too much of a good thing, by which we mean a cream-filled balloon the size of a volley ball. Volley, volley, spike! Play a game of volleyball with it in the middle of a busy plaza.

#51 / PHOTO / 47 POINTS / Anyone who serves in the military is risking their life to serve their nation. Being respectful to not trespass on military grounds, stand in front of a large military craft, ship, tank, or plane with an inclusive sign of thanks to every service member of every kind. You may post this image on social media prior to the end of the hunt, if you choose. Submit the image with a link to your post in the comment section (if you chose to post it).

#52 / VIDEO / 41 POINTS / (Time-lapse up to 30 seconds.) Paint a dignified portrait of a President, Prime Minister, King, or Queen. But we don’t want you to waste canvas or paper! Paint this on a loved one’s bare back or abdomen. (use skin safe paints or edible “paint-like” food products!)

#53 / PHOTO / 33 POINTS / Write something in frosting on a cake that you’ve always wanted to say to someone, and deliver it to them.

#54 / PHOTO / 40 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Listen to this and be scared: http://www.radiolab.org/story/nukes/. But this bill has been introduced to try to solve this global risk. Let’s get it approved! Tweet ALL of your reps to pass the legislation to make congressional approval for first nuclear strike US law. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide a link to the tweet in the comment field of the submit page. // UPDATE: Edited for clarity: Not senators but representatives.

#55 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 34 POINTS / Make a homemade Castiel kite with a child. We must see the kite in flight.

#56 / PHOTO / 41 POINTS / Sometimes things are just too comfy to leave, but you’re prepared for this! Let’s see you in your “Hammock Self-Containment Unit”. This, of course, would be you in a hammock with everything you need to live for one week, including all life preserving items, sanitation supplies and, of course, entertainment (live or otherwise). Make sure it’s clean, well organized, and designed for easy access to everything.

#57 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 52 POINTS / Show us a beautiful mermaid or sea creature performing a politically defiant modern dance solo to the beautiful music of the Sea Organ at Zadar. (Can’t make it to Zadar? The wave organ in San Francisco or the high tide organ in Blackpool may be substituted.)

#58 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 89 POINTS / It’s time to recreate the epic historic Great Zombie vs. Vampire World War II. As you recall, this particular battle took place with Nerf guns (homemade or otherwise) in an arena, forest or field, and was wild, gruesome, and featured multiple soldiers.

#59 / PHOTO / 59 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! This item takes place on Friday, Aug 11th, in whatever city you’re in at 10am in your time zone. Stand in front of your state or province’s legislative building (the building where your laws are enacted) and with your friends, hold up a large sign showing an excerpt or summary of a law that protects civil rights. For example if you live in the US, you could hold up a sign with a portion of the 1st amendment of the US Constitution written on it. Use the hashtag #gishwhes4rights. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

#60 / VIDEO / 51 POINTS / Up to 30 seconds - you may speed up or slow down the video if you need to.) Using only air-moving devices or machines, successfully navigate a balloon through a strange series of obstacles. It must be suspended in the air, without anyone or anything other than moving air touching it. It must travel at least 10 yards and culminate with your friend popping it with a needle sticking out from a hat they’re wearing.

#61 / VIDEO / 76 POINTS / (As long as it takes to complete the song.) THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! James Corden hosts Carpool Karaoke in the US— a viral show that has celebrities singing songs with him in a car. (Yes, we realize this is typical lowbrow-American TV, but it works.) We want to upgrade carpool karaoke and make it more high-brow. Create your own carpool karaoke with a political or intellectual powerhouse. Your co-singer must be either a nobel laureate, MacArthur Fellow, a national elected official, Bill Nye, Jane Goodall, Neil deGrasse Tyson, or any past or present member of the Harlem Globetrotters. Oh, and your karaoke song must have sufficient gravitas and must be an 80s pop song. For example, “Like a Virgin” would do nicely. Shoot your video Carpool Karaoke style. Tweet the video to @JKCorden with #gishwhesloveskaraoke and mention who your passenger is in the post. Upload the video on our submit page but be sure to provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

#62 / PHOTO / 42 POINTS / Honeybees are a “keystone” species just like sharks. If they’re gone, we’re in big trouble. Unfortunately, there are currently “Colony Collapse Disorders” happening with honeybees throughout the world. This is when the majority of worker bees in a colony disappear, leaving the queen and immature bees to fend for themselves (most colonies completely die). This has major global food crop implications, as honeybees perform the magic of pollination of agricultural crops. If bees go by the wayside, we will have to find alternative pollination solutions, and that ain’t gonna be easy. But, let’s roll up our sleeves and give it a shot: Plant something in your garden (or plant a garden if you don’t have one) that is bee friendly (even if it’s just one plant in one pot on a patio). Spring - lilacs, penstemon, lavender, sage, verbena, and wisteria. Summer – Mint, cosmos, squash, tomatoes, pumpkins, sunflowers, oregano, rosemary, poppies, black-eyed Susan, passion flower vine, honeysuckle. Fall – Fuschia, mint, bush sunflower, sage, verbena, toadflax. Take a picture of yourself wearing some sort of bee-attire doing your part to pollinate your newly planted plant.

#63 / VIDEO / 265 POINTS / (Time-lapse up to 1 minute but preferably under 30 seconds.) Loo goes to space! A person named Loo won our NASA email contest last Fall, and Loo’s prize is out of this world. Write “Loo” on a paper airplane and launch it from the stratosphere (or higher). We must CLEARLY see you writing the name on the paper airplane and folding it, the paper airplane’s journey into space, and then the actual launch where the plane is released from the stratosphere from whatever vehicle has conveyed it to those heights (high-altitude weather balloons are an acceptable means of conveyance). Oh, and one more thing: the paper airplane must be decorated and must have a message on it about a secret, global conspiracy to make the world a better place. It should also have your team name written on it and the following email address: with the instructions: “If found please email picture of airplane and location found to: airgishwhes@gmail.com.

#64 / PHOTO / 58 POINTS / Quilt a gishwhes onesie out of underwear and/or gloves. Strike a pose in the lobby of a financial institution or bank. Bonus points if it’s the floor of a stock exchange.

#65 / PHOTO / 65 POINTS / You know SuperWhoLock? The amalgamation of Supernatural, Doctor Who and Sherlock? Well, that’s been done to death and everyone has moved on to the next big mashup. Let’s see 3D street art on a pavement or wall (in chalk!) that’s of a scene or setting from SuperWhoWatch (an amalgamation of Supernatural, Doctor Who and BayWatch)

#66 / PHOTO / 18 POINTS / Personify your favorite movie title. Include a caption on your image of the title of the movie in quotes. - Tanya Best

#67 / PHOTO / 43 POINTS / Banana Hammock. This year’s summer fashion elitists are all wearing the latest rage: Banana Bikini or Banana Briefs. Join them!

#68 / PHOTO / 51 POINTS / You finally have a use for all the naked bananas you now have sitting around! Bake as much banana bread as you can with “gishwhes” spelled out in bananas on the top & distribute it to your local nursing home.

#69 / VIDEO / 28 POINTS / You’ve been putting this off for far too long. Tell your parents something bad that you did as a child that they still don’t know about. Capture their reaction. This must not be staged. We have an Academy Award Winning Judge on staff that will determine if your parent has already heard this story and you will be docked points. - CJ and Lauren

#70 / VIDEO / 39 POINTS / (Time-lapse down to 20 seconds.) Sidewalk cafes are all the rage, but most “sidewalk cafes” are total posers. Set up a “sidewalk cafe” the way it was meant to be - on an actual sidewalk. Cook a delicious omelet using just a magnifying glass, a hot sidewalk, and the sun. Share your feast with a friend!

#71 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 45 POINTS / DELETED FOR REASONS // ORIGINAL: THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Rapper B. o. B. seems to think that the world is flat. Perform a highly scientific experiment that proves that it is not and tweet the results to him (https://twitter.com/bobatl). Submit the image or video you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

#72 / PHOTO / 111 POINTS / I hate to say it, but this financial company is underwater. Let’s see the board meeting— with professionally dressed people at the table with chairs, paper, pens etc… all fully submerged at the bottom of a swimming pool.

#73 / PHOTO / 39 POINTS / Visit a local laundromat. Place decorated envelopes with enough money (in coins or bills, depending on the machines) for one load of washing and one load of drying on at least one machine with the note: “We swim together, we tumble together. Love, Gishwhes.”

#74 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 43 POINTS / Modify a grocery store shopping cart to be space-worthy. Put an alien being in the pilot’s seat and help them navigate the terrain of the “Earth produce” department to collect specimens.

#75 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 16 POINTS / They told me I couldn’t, so I did. Pose in front of a sign declaring a rule. Break that rule. A few notes: It must be safe (what you are doing), and it MUST NOT be a law or illegal where you are. It must only be a “rule”. For example, you might find a sign that says, “collared shirts only.” You would pose in front of that sign wearing a tank top. - Inspired by Emily Shulman

#76 / PHOTO / 39 POINTS / Have a caveperson demonstrate glass-blowing. - Jennifer Pierce

#77 / PHOTO / 24 POINTS / Personify or embody your team name. Caption your image with your team name. - Shannon

#78 / PHOTO / PHOTO or VIDEO / 48 POINTS / Being in the hospital can be scary and lonely for kids! Visit your local hospital to play a two-player video game with a pediatric patient. Be sure to dress thematically to match your game(s)! Take a picture of yourself in front of the children’s hospital. Do not take pictures with the kids unless they approve, their guardian(s) approve, and the hospital approves; we don’t want them to feel exploited. However, you MUST play with a child to get points for this item. This will be an honor system. You will have very bad karma if you cheat on this one. - Kristin Lindsay - Child’s Play charity.

#79 / VIDEO / 29 POINTS / (Up to 20 seconds.) Why would you move from the couch during a Supernatural binge watching session? Build a complex SPN-themed Rube-Goldberg machine to fill your empty glass, catapult you a snack, or to serve some other couch potato need. - Diane-Audrey Carlier

#80 / VIDEO / 73 POINTS / You’ve all seen “dog shaming memes” on the Internets. You know that crowd that lines up at the plaza of The Today Show and shows up on air? Let’s take it over with gisher-self-shaming signs. Hold up a large, colorful sign that details something you did that you probably shouldn’t have done (for example, “I drank milk straight of the carton and put it back in the fridge without telling my roommates”). Make it a light-hearted trivial violation, not a deep-seated personality flaw, actual violation of the law, or other serious offense. Share with us a clip of the AIRED FOOTAGE that shows your team’s sign and in the comments section of the item submitter, let us know which sign was yours. Do not add your team name or “gishwhes” anywhere on the sign… we want this to be a mystery.

#81 / PHOTO / 25 POINTS / Sometimes it feels like your boss expects you to be in more than one place at more than one time, but you’re a gisher so you know how to deliver. Using the panoramic photo function on your phone, insert yourself at least three times in the same picture in different positions and/or wardrobe to show yourself as you “multitask”. You may NOT Photoshop yourself into the image. (Hint: you have to run around the person taking the picture each time they pass you in the frame.)

#82 / PHOTO / 19 POINTS / In honour of Canada's 150th birthday, even though you may not be Canadian, you and a friend should clearly cover yourself in maple syrup and go roll in some maple leaves. - Jessica G.

#83 / PHOTO / 29 POINTS / Lets see your interpretation of fireworks using vegetables and spaghetti as mixed media. - Saty381

#84 / PHOTO / 52 POINTS / (Two Images side-by-side.) The first image is a photo of an illustrated page from a children’s book. The second image is your reenactment of that illustration in 3 dimensions. - Inspired by Sarah Trumbley

#85 / PHOTO / 47 POINTS / Let’s see LABSWHES. The Largest Awesome Balloon Sculpture the World Has Ever Seen. The themes this year are “insect” or “space”—or both. You must be in the middle of this structure.

#86 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 39 POINTS / Everyone thinks unicorns are beautiful, magical, gentle creatures. You know better. Prove it to the world! You may use any media you like, including Photoshop. - Traci Akierman

#87 / PHOTO / 41 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Tweet a picture of you or your child dressed as a bear in school to @betsydevos with whatever text you like and “#KeepSchoolsSafeFromBears #Gishwhes”. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. - Diedra Lookingbill

#88 / PHOTO / 60 POINTS / Three words: 10 Mannequin-pin Bowling. - Ariana Preis

#89 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 43 POINTS / Apply lipstick while jumping on a trampoline. - Emily Schulman

#90 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 42 POINTS / “Why did the chicken cross the road?” There’s no better crossing guard than a mother hen! Dressed as a chicken, offer to help people cross a busy street.

#91 / PHOTO / 31 POINTS / Leave a Yelp review of gishwhes after you deliver food to the homeless or to a homeless shelter.

#92 / VIDEO / 62 POINTS / (Up to 20 seconds.) It’s nice to see a serious sport finally get the recognition it deserves: http://www.euronews.com/2017/04/30/finns-compete-in-annual-hobby-horse-championship. Now, let's see video documentation of "Human NASCAR" complete with the speeding, lane changes, a pit-stop, crashes, etc. You & at least 5 friends must be drivers of "vehicles" of your own design, complete with corporate sponsorship logos. All vehicles must be motor-free and foot-propelled (ala-Flintstones) and all engine sounds must be vocalized by you and your friends. Just to be clear... this is Human NASCAR, not roller derby. All vehicles must be propelled on foot.

#93 / PHOTO / 72 POINTS / Get an elected official’s signature on a statement (written on official letterhead paper) declaring gishwhes an act of lawful resistance or civil disobedience. (Inspired by U of C Scav, 1987)

#94 / PHOTO / 44 POINTS / Camouflage yourself in a pet store.

#95 / VIDEO / 58 POINTS / (Up to 30 seconds.) The Silicon Gourmet has been teaching a neural network to generate recipes. Learning to cook is hard (as my son can attest)! In the interest of encouraging budding AI chefs everywhere, create a Food Network-worthy video preparing one of the recipes as described in the network’s cookbook. Make sure to sample the results on camera. Oh, and you must look and behave as if you were a droid, of course.

#96 / PHOTO / 38 POINTS / (Try to take a very close-up photo - a.k.a. “Macro” photo.) Nice grill! Combine the “tiny food” trend with urban fashion. Show someone cooking tiny hamburgers & hot dogs on a friend’s “grill” (the dental kind.)

#97 / PHOTO / 61 POINTS / Do something fitting in front of the Gereja Ayam (the abandoned Chicken Church of Indonesia). For example, you could play a game of Duck, Duck, Chicken! Or you could ponder the question: Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Or you could host an easter egg hunt… You get the picture.

#98 / VIDEO / 38 POINTS / A marionette show featuring a puppet of Trump being controlled by a Putin lookalike. Quintuple BONUS POINTS if Putin himself is the puppeteer.

#99 / VIDEO / 47 POINTS / Letterboxing (http://www.letterboxing.org/ or see https://www.atlasquest.com/) is a game where people hide small weatherproof boxes in publicly accessible spaces with a logbook & a stamp. They share the clues to find their box on the web or via word of mouth. Create a letterbox for your team & share clues so other teams can find it over social media. Leave a logbook with your team stamp on it in the box. Then, find another teams’ box and leave them a message of encouragement along with your team’s stamp in their log book. Submit proof that you found at least one other team’s book & the message you wrote. NO COLLUSION! (And that goes for you, too, Donald.) // UPDATE NOTE: Please either pickup your boxes after the Hunt ends or dedicate yourselves to maintaining them post-hunt.

#100 / PHOTO / 38 POINTS / Calliope. Clio. Euterpe. Erato. Melpomene. Polyhymnia. Terpischore. Thalia. Urania. Inspirational goddesses of literature, the arts and science in Greek mythology. On the steps of the National Gallery in Trafalgar Square, provide a visual representation of the muse that guides you in your art and/or life.

#101 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 80 POINTS / As I'm sure you’ve seen, over the years we have marketed gishwhes relentlessly and shamelessly (because we really want everyone to do it). This is the last gishwhes, so now it’s your turn to go ahead and show us how we should’ve marketed it. Create a gishwhes ad that no one would be able to resist. Note: you may make false or misleading claims if you so choose, but because we’re curious, you could even take a stab at a legit one. …

#102 / PHOTO / 74 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! During the First Annual and Last Ever 2017 gishwhes Tea Party, we identified gishers based on their right-brush or left-brush toothbrushing statuses. Conduct a massive poll on your social networks for the gishwhes Institute of Vital Statistics to prove conclusively whether people brush their teeth starting on the same side of their mouth as their dominant hand or the opposite side. Because this is solid science, your sample size must have a minimum of 400 respondents. Submit a visually-compelling graph of your poll data and the number of votes and the winner. Use the hashtag #gishwhesteeth. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

#103 / VIDEO / 26 POINTS / Play hopscotch at one of the marker sites of Víddaflakk. (BONUS: Play Interdimensional Hopscotch.)

#104 / PHOTO / 90 POINTS / A far-right Republican senator and a far-left Democrat Senator (or two similarly “diametrically party-opposed” legislative makers in your country) co-wearing a very large (fits two people) “This is Our ‘Get-Along’ Shirt.” Caption the image with the names of the politicians.

#105 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 81 POINTS / We know a little girl that makes a different kind of Advent Calendar. As she marks off each day on the calendar, she gives something away. Make your own version of a reverse Advent calendar. On the first day of gishwhes, create a decorated Advent calendar whereby, for each day on the calendar, you depict something you’re going to give away. Then, each day of the Hunt, take a picture of you fulfilling your calendar item. Submit 7 pictures in a grid (or a video slideshow) showing what you’ve done. Then, continue on through the calendar period. (Yes, this will continue after the Hunt is over, but though gishwhes as we know it may be ending, its spirit will live on in you!) -Keegan Connor Tracy’s 10-year old daughter

#106 / VIDEO / 79 POINTS / The Lumbasumba region is being protected this year by Gishwhes. We gishers managed to purchase for permanent preservation more than 60 square miles of the Lumbasumba forest during the final weeks of registration in July! But the Lumbasumba area is more than just a forest. It’s also the hottest new dance craze. Show us how it’s done. (As all gishers know, you need to do it next to a REAL monkey, a parrot, or a camel to do it right.)

#107 / VIDEO / 92 POINTS / (Up to 45 seconds.) AMOK ITEM! Let’s virtually graffiti the world with kindness! Using a GPS tracking app (like Figure Running or similar), walk, jog, or run as large a path as you can to spell out a message of love, hope, or kindness. As you go, stop and perform acts of kindness and document them. You must show us the map with coordinates at the end of your path as well as the minimum of 3 documented act of kindness. - Inspired by Tia Pogue

#108 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 28 POINTS / The chickens have come home to Proust.

#109 / VIDEO / 71 POINTS / (Up to 22 seconds.) Wonder Woman being “Superman-splained” to.

#110 / PHOTO / 29 POINTS / The return of the Three-ingredient Challenge! Show us: Triptych, Transylvanian, takin.

#111 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 45 POINTS / A street vendor handing out toilet paper roses at the toilet fountain in Foshan, China.

#112 / PHOTO / 83 POINTS / A ballet troupe in tutus, engaged in a bar brawl - freeze framed at its most climactic moment.

#113 / PHOTO / 62 POINTS / Set up a Maximum Security Birdhouse in a beautiful public park.

#114 / PHOTO / 41 POINTS / DELETED FOR REASONS // ORIGINAL: Let’s see a TripAdvisor or Airbnb review of your mother’s womb as an “extended stay hotel”. Keep it suitable for work and any child’s prying eyes! // UPDATE: Item only needs listing, no review necessary. / UPDATE: Item deleted.

#115 / PHOTO / 83 POINTS / Make A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of Le Grande Jatte by Seraut into an elaborate dot-to-dot image.

#116 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 65 POINTS / Not many people know this, but the Kessel Run was actually a foot race. Let’s see at least 5 Star Wars characters competing in the Kessel Run in a shopping mall.

#117 / VIDEO / 65 POINTS / Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole. Let’s see Dean Winchester driving a pedi-cab or quadricycle with Castiel & Sam as passengers.

#118 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 60 POINTS / Rumor has it that Amazon is teaming up with the Vatican for a bold new service: On Demand Drone Deliverance services. Show us a drone administering a wedding service, confession, last rites, communion or baptism.

#119 / PHOTO / 22 POINTS / Trump l’oeil. (This is not a typo.)

#120 / VIDEO / 91 POINTS / You’ve heard of a soap box derby, but the sofa bed derby is where it’s at. Let’s see two “race car” sofa beds, each with pajama-clad “drivers”, racing down an actual street. Be safe and complete this where there is absolutely no traffic!

#121 / PHOTO / 32 POINTS / The people of Iceland believe in Huldufólk, which are invisible elves. They build tiny houses and churches for them. But the Huldufólk deserve to have a nightlife, too! Let’s see a tiny Huldufólk nightclub in a busy urban area.

#122 / PHOTO / 40 POINTS / They say a rolling stone gathers no moss, but can moss gather a Rolling Stone? Make a portrait of one of The Rolling Stones out of moss.

#123 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 38 POINTS / As all gishers know, Saturday, August 12 is “Meet Another Gisher Day.” Meet up in front of the largest art museum in your town at 10:00 AM (of whatever timezone you’re in). It’s a pot-luck coleslaw brunch this year, so bring your favorite family recipe of coleslaw… and as much sidewalk chalk as you can. After brunch, decorate the pavement with a collaborative message to the world. In order for a meet-up to count you need to have representatives of at least 5 teams present, so this will require some organizing. Gishwhes is all about coming together, so teams may collaborate (gasp!) on this one, but your team’s image or video must still be all your own.

#124 / PHOTO / 21 POINTS / Be someone’s “rock” to get them through the hard times. Hand-paint small rocks with a message of kindness & leave them in areas that need a pick-me-up. (On the underside, please write “Pass it on.”) You must paint & hide at least one rock for each member of your team.

#125 / VIDEO / 41 POINTS / (Time-lapse under 20 seconds.) All good things must come to an end, and so it is with the Hunt. Create a “sand” mandala featuring images that symbolize the hunt to you… all using pixie sticks as your chakpur and sand. When it’s done, show us your masterwork and then, just like the Buddhist monks, sweep it away and get ready for what’s next.

#126 / PHOTO / 88 POINTS / DELETED FOR REASONS // ORIGINAL: Reward! I won’t say that Jensen & Jared are missing their balls, but they were last seen being sent into this quarry at Britannia Beach. Find them, take a photo, and put them back exactly where you found them for other teams to find. If you keep them, you will lose valuable karma & points. // UPDATE: Added safety advisory and strong caution based on reports. // UPDATE: Apparently Item #126, the one in which you are charged with finding Jared and Jensen’s golf balls is not going well. Now, granted, these are jared and jensen’s balls, so one would expect them to be quite hard to find. But it seems their balls are leaving a tremendous number of people unsatisfied as well. (To make matters worse, the owners of the quarry in BC have also installed a “no trespassing” sign since the hunt started and several bears have been spotted there by gishers as well.) So… I’m suspending this item. However, there will be a replacement item soon wherein you will be seeking out my golf balls, (which have never left an unsatisfied customer yet.) Also, if you have already completed item #126, you will be able to submit your photo of Jared and Jensen’s ball(s) for the new item and get full credit. The new item will be assigned the same number of points.

#127 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 64 POINTS / These Kung-Fu Nuns (dare we say “Nunjas?”) are biking through the Himalayas to stop human trafficking. (No, really.) In their honor, let’s see some tricks on a BMX bike. Rider must be dressed in a nun’s habit.

#128 / PHOTO / 84 POINTS / Get a Porcupanda or other gishwhes mascot included as an emoji on an official iPhone emoji list.

#129 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 57 POINTS / IMAGE or VIDEO. Pope St. Francis set up a laundromat to help the homeless get access to clean clothes. Follow his lead by setting up a service station to benefit the homeless or impoverished in your area (a “take what you need” public pantry, toiletries cabinet, water station, public shower, public toilet, laundry facility, open library, etc.).

#130 / PHOTO / 23 POINTS / A tactometer used to measure tact.

#131 / PHOTO / 33 POINTS / Make a collage that features things only locals from your town would know about. Display it prominently in a public space in your town.

#132 / PHOTO / 79 POINTS / Couch Surfing 2: The Revenge. Last year, in our infinite wisdom, we suggested “couch surfing: real surfing, real couch.” We quickly came to our senses and pulled the item for safety reasons, but it’s been a year and we don’t hold onto the past. Couch surfing: Let’s see it in the real surf with a BUOYANT (e.g.,inflatable) couch. You may not use a real couch as it’s too dangerous and bad for the ecosystem. Make it happen. (You may not leave any couches in any body of water and you must be super safe with this. If waves are too big, do not do it.)

#133 / PHOTO / 42 POINTS / Waste not, want not. Save every piece of non-biodegradable refuse that you would have normally thrown away from Days 1-5 of the Hunt and on day 6, use this material to create a sculpture of an endangered animal.

#134 / VIDEO / 21 POINTS / My wife is so trend-forward, she recently took a “goat yoga class” (it’s real; you can google it.) Without hurting, upsetting, or endangering ANY animal, show us the next trend in animal-infused yoga that she should get on board with.

#135 / VIDEO / 40 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! (Up to 30 seconds.) Freeze frame on a picture of you (like they do at the end of movies) and then roll a credit sequence for your own life. Include a "here’s what happens to you in the future" sentence or two and then a listing of the people that have helped you get where you are now or where you are going and what their “titles” are. Post this on the social media channel of your choice with the hashtags #gishwhes #mylife. Submit the video, and in the comment field provide the link to the post.

#136 / PHOTO / 29 POINTS / Often misunderstood and rarely properly pronounced, chupacabras just need a good home. Adopt one and show us your favorite bonding moment.

#137 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 51 POINTS / Take an elderly person (at least 70 years old) on a joyride in their favorite car (same make and model and vintage) from their youth. The elderly person must be at least 70 years old; the car, at least 60 years old... and you and the senior must be dressed in period attire that reflects the era when the car was manufactured.

#138 / PHOTO / 52 POINTS / Prejudice is something we can easily see and call out in others. However, we all have biases and prejudices of our own that we are often blind to. You’re going to have to dig deep here - but you’re a gisher, so we know you can do it. Show us you taking a step to overcome one of your own prejudices.

#139 / PHOTO / 61 POINTS / Each member of your team must knit or crochet one piece of a quilted throw that, when combined, showcases your team emblem or symbol.

#140 / VIDEO / 51 POINTS / Everyone talks about drum circles, but they grossly underestimate the power of other shapes. Create a complex shape with as many sides, angles or curves as you can, and demonstrate the power of percussion geometry - with as many drummers as you can drum up.

#141 / PHOTO / 42 POINTS / At least 8 people walking in twos, on the Tiger & Turtle in Duisburg, Germany as if it were an actual roller coaster. They must keep their hands up as they walk the track, except for one of the front “riders” who is clenching an invisible lap bar, terrified. It’s okay to be nauseous.

#142 / VIDEO / 80 POINTS / As all gishers know, a Gish Gallop can only be performed by a Forbes 1000 CEO in the lobby of that CEO's company’s headquarters on a hobby horse or a live pony. Caption your video with the name of the company and CEO that we are watching as they Gish Gallop. // UPDATE: CEO list changed.

#143 / PHOTO / 41 POINTS / Sure, most Stormtroopers toed the line, but back in the 1960s there were a few draft-dodging peacenik Stormtroopers. Find a famous vintage photo of a peace sit-in or Woodstock-level love-in and flawlessly photoshop in one or more Stormtroopers. We must think it’s the real thing. As an alternative, you can stage your own “peace” picture and submit an “aged” stormtrooper sit-in image. YES, YOU MAY PHOTOSHOP THIS ITEM!

#144 / VIDEO / 37 POINTS / (Up to 30 seconds.) An impromptu concert consisting of a chocalho, an apito, a reco-reco, and a pandeiro. (Bonus points if you perform in front of, or in, the Teatro Amazonas.) Oh, and of course the musicians are playing Carry On my Wayward Son by @kansasband.

#145 / PHOTO / 71 POINTS / Oversized board games are a trend, with oversized Jenga and such. Let’s see a game of tiddlywinks being played— scaled up to giant-sized.

#146 / PHOTO / 40 POINTS / Two nice suburban monster moms out for a day of shopping at Hoxton’s Monster Supplies in England.

#147 / PHOTO / 28 POINTS / Paint an extraordinary portrait of your favorite gishwhes mascot with the brand “D2N” (with the 2 backwards) on the Werregarenstraat.

#148 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 38 POINTS / Dress up as a superhero and perform acts of “kindness” heroism at Hősök tere (Hero's Square).

#149 / VIDEO / 71 POINTS / (Time-lapse up to 25 seconds.) Canada's Prime Minister Justin Trudeau gets a lot of attention for being super hot. Frankly, it's starting to detract from his ability to govern. Cool things down by making a sculpture of Trudeau out of Canada's most ample resource: ice. A couple of caveats: the frozen water you use must have something added to it to make it opaque, and inside the ice must be something emblematic of canada that doesn’t melt (for example, a hockey skate). The timelapse must be of the sculpture melting revealing the object hidden inside. Make sure to frame your shot with a fitting or neutral background so that the final product really pops.

#150 / PHOTO / 33 POINTS / Ireland has the lowest reports of UFO sightings in Europe each year. Something must be done about this! Make and display a convincing UFO in a public place in Ireland to increase the number.

#151 / PHOTO / 54 POINTS / Visit Cat Island (Tashirojima, Japan) dressed as a dog. You must have at least 10 cats in the photo.

#152 / PHOTO / 42 POINTS / Decorate the exterior of your home like the Pan House, using whatever object speaks to you.

#153 / VIDEO / 72 POINTS / Not to be quixotic, but wind power and automation are the future of personal grooming. Create a wind-powered device to automate a self-care process. Could be a wind-powered shoe shining machine, a wind-powered, toothbrush, etc. (It must actually work and must actually be powered by wind.)

#154 / PHOTO / 33 POINTS / There’s a UFO Observation Deck (redmonkeygroup.com) in Slovakia. On Sunday, August 6 at 3 PM Slovakian time, grab your friends and dress up as your interpretation of extraterrestrials and go there. Bring luggage and queue up outside of it as though you're boarding to go back home (you don’t have to enter).

#155 / PHOTO / 40 POINTS / Over the years, we’ve had menstrual-hygiene supply sculptures of everything from dinosaurs to seagulls to puppies. We’ve also gotten a lot of flak for encouraging waste, and in protest gishers have donated thousands of menstrual pads to shelters, (which actually proves that in fact we at gishwhes can do no wrong). This final year’s list wouldn’t be complete without a menstrual-hygiene sculpture, so we’re ending this by splitting the difference: Create a tiny, perfectly sculpted statue of Michelangelo’s David or another famous historic sculpture of your choosing out of a SINGLE tampon, and then donate at least 1 box of menstrual hygiene supplies to your local shelter. Submit the image of your sculpture. The donation will be on the honor system. Remember, KARMA is a bitch.

#156 / PHOTO / 71 POINTS / Sure, Misha & HRH Queen Elizabeth II had a rocky year in 2016 with their “Brexit Breakup”, but despite a brief conscious uncoupling, theirs is a love that stands the test of time. Prove it by showing us Egyptian hieroglyphics, Greek urns, or other recently-unearthed archaeological finds that prove theirs is a love that has lasted through the ages. If you’re choosing to do a hieroglyphic, you may NOT permanently deface any stone - use chalk!

#157 / PHOTO / 38 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! NASA is soliciting tweets to send to Voyager 1. Tweet your suggestion with #gishwhes. I suggest it be the following theme: Voyager 1 ran to the store and you are texting to remind it to pick something up at the store. But we will permit messages of any type so let your imaginations run wild. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide a link to the tweet in the comment field of the submit page.

#158 / PHOTO / 22 POINTS / Thanks to “reactions” we can now communicate our feelings more clearly to one another! But Facebook limits us to just 6 reactions and we at gishwhes HQ believe that this limitation constraints our ability to express nuanced emotions to one another. Let’s see an updated version of the Facebook “reactions” with feelings like “silently judging you”, “reacting positively to your face but planning to gossip about this later”, and “I’m just not sure how to feel about this” and other more subtle emotions. You may photoshop this item.

#159 / PHOTO / 47 POINTS / Who said you couldn't Hunt while in hospital? Certainly not any of us! Show off your large-scale cartoon skills by writing the longest poem (or drawing the largest mural) you can, all about the adventures of a virus caught in a hospital, on a scroll made from a roll of exam table paper.

#160 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 41 POINTS / As you all know, my grandmother lives at Roland Park Place in Baltimore, MD. It’s a senior assisted-living home. She’s been hesitant to have the shenanigans of gishwhes descend, so let’s legitimize that fear... from Tuesday to Thursday 10AM to 4PM ONLY PLEASE! (DON’T SHOW UP AT ANY OTHER TIME OR IT WILL BE AN INCONVENIENCE TO THE GUESTS AT THE HOME and you will be docked points!) Let’s invade Roland Park Place literally! Show up dressed as an extraterrestrial on an interplanetary goodwill mission. Bring an offering of your home planet’s favorite treats or creature comforts (games, large print books, slippers, slip-proof socks, soft blankets, etc) and specimens of natural beauty from this planet (humans like that). You will get 25% bonus points if you perform this item at Roland Park Place (that’s the added value of nepotism), but you can get full credit if you perform this item at any retirement home/assisted living facility.

#161 / PHOTO / 87 POINTS / David LaChapelle is a renowned experimental photographer known for his kitsch-pop surrealist style. Recreate a well-known painting as a photograph in the style of David LaChappelle. Somewhere in your image there must be a banana, and you may not depict The Last Supper. (2X Bonus: get Dave Chappelle to star in your David LaChapelle homage.)

#162 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 33 POINTS / Lube luge. That's it. That's the item.

#163 / PHOTO / 60 POINTS / This Hunt’s must-have fashion trend: an aquarium hat with live fish. The aquarium hat must not endanger the live fish in any way.

#164 / PHOTO / 62 POINTS / DELETED FOR REASONS // ORIGINAL: Get a bonafide zillow listing for property on Mars.

#165 / PHOTO / 28 POINTS / https://twitter.com/zenxv/status/845474882607632384

#166 / VIDEO / 38 POINTS / (Time-lapse up to 30 seconds.) Follow a tomato back in time from the local co-op to where the farmer grew it. Thank them for their service by sharing a sandwich with them… one that has slices of that tomato in it.

#167 / VIDEO / 29 POINTS / (Time-lapse up to 20 seconds.) There are two things that science has proven unequivocally: 1) global warming is happening and 2) sucking the melting ice cream from a tiny hole in the bottom of a sugar cone is the greatest possible pleasure in life. (Minimum 5 rounded scoops on top and you must suck all the ice cream through the tiny hole.)

#168 / PHOTO / 66 POINTS / When the apocalypse comes and the power goes out you are going to be sorry you are so digitally-dependent! Have your social media page printed on microfiche… just in case.

#169 / PHOTO / 27 POINTS / Write "Ass butt" (in non-toxic kids finger paint or chalk!) on the hindquarters of an Ass. (This should go without saying, but be careful & safe. Approach from the side, never stand directly behind it, and try to keep the donkey happy so you don't get injured.)

#170 / VIDEO / 88 POINTS / Angels may be all-powerful, but they’re luddites (technologically behind the times) and it affects their productivity in the office. Let’s see an angel writing something on an old-school mechanical typewriter (not electric) featuring a working Enochian keyboard. (The keys and keystrokes must correspond to actual Enochian typeface.)

#171 / PHOTO / 41 POINTS / A stump grinder with a unicorn decal, with a child no more than 7 years old wearing a pink princess costume in the driver’s seat. // // UPDATE: Machine should not be operational during photo op. / AMENDED ITEM: A stump grinder with a unicorn decal, being pushed by a child no more than 7 years old wearing a pink princess costume. (Edited because Misha is not much into stump-grinding and thought a stump grinder was something else.) It should go without saying, but this is a photo op. The stump grinder should not be on or operational. Safety first!

#172 / PHOTO / 32 POINTS / Now that this may be the last gishwhes-as-we-know-it ever, it’s time to reflect on missed opportunities. Let’s see the Item List Misha SHOULD have made all these years. Give us your team’s ideal gishwhes Item List with a minimum of 10 Items. If the majority of the items you create look like no thought was put into them (and you were just quickly writing down items to get the points), you will receive zero points.

#173 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 55 POINTS / Complete one of the more challenging items on your team’s homemade gishwhes Item List.

#174 / PHOTO / 33 POINTS / DELETED FOR REASONS // ORIGINAL: An Airbnb listing for the gishbus.

#175 / PHOTO / 36 POINTS / Everyone knows “high noon” means “high tea”. Bring a little bit of civilization to the frontier with Wild West teacup and saucer holsters.

#176 / PHOTO / 33 POINTS / For our gish cousins in the antipodes where the days are short and the nights are cold: Establish a “TLC” station at Federation Square, opposite Flinders Street Station in Melbourne or on the steps of the Opera House in Sydney, and provide a little warmth – be it a coffee, a heat pack, or simply a smile – for those making their journey to work on the cold winter mornings. // UPDATE: Melbourne TLC location changed. (Original said “Establish a “TLC” station under the iconic clocks at Flinders Street Station in Melbourne”.)

#177 / PHOTO / 44 POINTS / A Scottish terrier in a Scottish kilt eating a scotch egg in front of an Irish monument.

#178 / PHOTO / 54 POINTS / The Prague Astronomical Clock – or Prague orloj – is the third oldest astronomical clock in the world, and the oldest one still operating. But imagine if this feat of mechanical engineering did more than mark the passage of time... Imagine it could actually take you back in time! Gather your teammates, friends, and family members together and show us the time period you would travel back to if this historic clock warped the time continuum. Note: You and your time-travelling companions must be pictured in front of the clock.

#179 / VIDEO / 36 POINTS / (Up to 45 seconds edited.) Share an audio dream diary of your first thoughts as you wake up every morning of the Hunt (so you cannot submit this until the last day of the Hunt!). It must be the first thing you do before you get out of bed.

#180 / VIDEO / 111 POINTS / (Up to 30 seconds.) Cinema has evolved, but some actors don’t. Let’s see a silent film actress against a 1920’s style black-and-white-set. The actor/actress must have exaggerated facial expressions and the score must be nickelodeon-style piano music. Suddenly, the music changes… It's hip hop and modern technology comes in with color and sync sound, but she's still black and white and still mouthing words with title card.

#181 / PHOTO / 87 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Let’s see a (SFW) 2,000 word essay published on twitter in 140 character bursts. (no attachments, etc.) about the best way to get pregnant for the 10th time. (I’m sorry, but I promised someone this would be an item.) Submit an image of the first post and then a link to this post in the COMMENT field of the submit page so we can check to make sure you “published” the whole thing.

#182 / PHOTO / 53 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Seamlessly modify using photoshop (or other digital altering software), a well-know oil painting by adding in an anachronistic element. For example, if it were a Monet, you might put one of the ladies under a parasol holding an ipad. YES, YOU MAY DIGITALLY ALTER THE IMAGE YOU ARE SUBMITTING… with a catch. The anachronistic element must be rendered seamlessly into the image in the style of the original painter or creator. It must look like a part of the original composition; we should not be able to tell it was added in later. Post the image on FB and/or Pinterest. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. #gishwhesModernMasterpiece

#183 / PHOTO / 53 POINTS / You are all soon going to be a part of a sinister plot to take over the world… in a unique way. But we need your help. Here’s the first thing you have to do: Decide what your favorite point of interest, historical site or national landmark is in your town or city and enter its address here: http://qrickit.com/qrickit_apps/qrickit_qrcode_creator_geo.php . Below the map on that webpage you’ll see an “optional text” field. Enter “Taken by CFG”. Then click “Qcreate” at the bottom. Download the QR code and submit it as your item. Stay tuned for what comes next...

#184 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 92 POINTS / (Up to 30 seconds if video.) Last year, we helped people around the world get access to clean water. But it's been a year and the problem certainly hasn't gone away. In fact, as global temperatures rise, the problem is only going to intensify. Work with your team to create a realistic (not a joke or parody) schematic or prototype of an easy-to-set up portable personal AWG (atmospheric water generator) system that could be used anywhere in the world. It must be cheap to build (aim for less than $10) with parts that can be found in any hardware store. It must be compact & light enough for a nomadic or homeless individual to carry around. Ideally, it would collect enough water in a day to sustain someone for that day.

#185 / PHOTO / 48 POINTS / Hug a national forest! Grab as many friends as you can and go to your favorite national forest or park and be tree huggers. Set the camera up so we can see all the tree hugging action clearly.

#186 / PHOTO / 46 POINTS / One of the biggest problems astronauts will face when they travel to Mars will be figuring out how to bring enough food for the three year journey. Porcupanda has offered the idea of making their spacecraft out of food. Show them how. Build an edible spacecraft using anything except “space ice cream” (Per our resident Director of Intergalactic Space Exploration, that stuff tastes like strawberry Styrofoam: “Bleecht!” as he so eloquently put it.)

#187 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 51 POINTS / Every year, the scientists at the NASA Jet Propulsion Lab make spectacular pumpkin carvings that put our humble Halloween jack-o-lanterns to shame (see https://www.wired.com/2016/10/watch-nasas-high-tech-pumpkins-action/). Whatever. What’s a rocket scientist got that you don’t have? Let’s see you out-do them! Show us your best and most outlandish WATERMELON-O-LANTERN carving. - Dave Lavery // UPDATE: Now PHOTO OR VIDEO submissions will be accepted.

#188 / PHOTO / 28 POINTS / For many years, military aircraft sported spectacular “nose art”— artistic homages to people, places, and ideas important to the aircraft crew. As aesthetically appealing as aircraft nose art may have been, we think they botched it on the choice of canvas. Show us your best nose art - but this time, get it right! All art must be on, around, or incorporate, your nose.

#189 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 32 POINTS / The World’s Worst Lawyer.

#190 / PHOTO / 51 POINTS / Oranges are the new black! Let’s see your most a-peeling cocktail dress all made out of - you guessed it - orange peels. Pose in a crowded urban bar.

#191 / VIDEO / 72 POINTS / (Up to 30 seconds time-lapsed and/or edited.) You didn’t think we were going to let all those oranges go to waste, did you? Wall Drugs has signs announcing Wall Drugs locations hundreds of miles before you get to the store, so drivers get to anticipate the goodness coming. Place signs along 5 miles of road leading up to an orange juice stand that speaks hyperbolically of the life-changing rejuvenation of the coming refreshment with a countdown of the miles. You must have a sign at least every quarter of a mile along the path. If this is insurmountable to you, at the very least, host a freshly-squeezed orange juice party in your backyard for all of your neighbors. You won’t get points for that, but you’ll use the juice and make some friends.

#192 / VIDEO / 47 POINTS / (Time lapse up to 25 seconds). In our busy world, people sometimes forget to slow down and see the beauty around them. Perform a task at work extremely slowly while everyone around you carries on at normal speed. When this is played back in in time lapse, you’re performing at normal speed and it’s the world around you that’s going too fast.

#193 / PHOTO / 10 POINTS / The Riemann hypothesis of mathematics includes the Riemann zeta function, which categorizes some zeros as “non-trivial zeros" and others as "trivial zeros." We think this unequal treatment of zeros, which are clearly all equal, is just wrong! Hold a protest in front of a university mathematics or computer science building with a sign that says something to the effect of "ALL ZEROS ARE EQUAL" or "NO ZEROS ARE TRIVIAL!"

#194 / PHOTO / 67 POINTS / Do you spend too much time indoors while you GISH? It’s time to get outside! Dust off your bicycle, grab a friend or two and go out and ride a 50-mile bike ride (this can be done over the entire period of the Hunt and may be done either on a long road trip somewhere or in different round trip legs to and from your house)! You must track your progress on a GPS drawing app. (Bonus points if you draw a picture of a gishwhes mascot with your path.) Oh, by the way - you need to be wearing part of a pineapple or banana (in some fashion) while you ride. Submit an image of your GPS drawing. Yes, it would be easy to cheat on this item, but let’s all take the high road and practice honesty on this one.

#195 / VIDEO / 235 POINTS / (This video can be as long as it takes to do the job, but we hope the job goes quickly and it is gobbled up fast so the video is short!) Using a steel shredder, shred a decommissioned bus. It must be a full sized bus with at least 10 rows. It may be a school bus or a municipal bus. It may not be a VW MiniBus; it must have been built to seat at least 30. Paint a message that conveys the fact that gishwhes recycled becomes CFG (we’ll explain later). For example, you could write: “Recycled gishwhes = CFG" in large font the side of the bus. Feel free to word this differently, but convey that message. The bigger the bus the better. Oh and paint the windows of the bus to show it’s passengers. (Obviously no living being is in the bus.) Although you should upload a video as your submission, be sure to take pictures of the event in case we need those for the coffee table book (we’ll email you for them).

#196 / PHOTO or VIDEO / 62 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! THIS IS A TOP SECRET ITEM! DO NOT SHARE ITS CONTENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA UNTIL DIRECTED OR YOU WILL RUIN THE SURPRISE AND BE DELUGED WITH BAD KARMA. By now, most of you may know our friend Giles Duley. If not, watch the video at the top of this page. Then, watch here to see what he did with us recently: https://youtu.be/-tOt9LfZF9w ...and he’s doing something amazing with us again with us this year (which we’ll be announcing VERY soon). Giles inspires us and we want to thank him for all of his hard (and often thankless) work. So, we’re going to thank him... BUT WE’RE GOING TO SURPRISE HIM! SO PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT POST ABOUT THIS UNTIL THE DESIGNATED TIME: On Friday, August 11th, at EXACTLY 9am PDT, we are going to give him a “thunderclap” of thanks on the Internet. Because Giles thinks EVERYONE can make a difference no matter their circumstances (and he’s a living embodiment of that), we’re going to prove it. Here’s your job: before the 11th, go out and do an act of kindness. But not just any act of kindness... Giles works hard to help refugee families and landmine victims, so your act of kindness should focus on expanding his work exponentially through the power of gishwhes and gishers. Do something that makes a meaningful, material difference in the life of either a refugee or someone who has been directly impacted by war. If you’re at a loss of how to do this, here are some suggestions: bring a care package to new refugees in your neighborhood, go to a refugee center and volunteer, bring a warm meal to a homeless veteran on the streets, volunteer at a soup kitchen where you know there are war veterans, make a donation to an organization that helps with reconstructive surgery and prosthetics for war victims, or sponsor a child made homeless by the war with a one-time or recurring donation. If you can’t manage to find or coordinate any of the above (but please try!), simply carry out a random act of kindness for another human being on the planet who could legitimately use some kindness. Dig deep on this one, guys. The goal is to cause a ripple effect from the work Giles is doing and expand it worldwide. Let's do this. Capture an image or video of this act. At 9am PDT on Friday, August 11th, post the image or video on Facebook with a detailed description of what you did and crosspost to Twitter. Be sure to mention Giles in the post. (For Facebook, tag @GilesDuleyPhotography and on Twitter, tag @gilesduley with #thanksGiles as the hashtag.) Submit the image or video you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post link in the comment field of the submit page.

#197 / VIDEO / 24 POINTS / Play a few bars of a well-known tune on a well-known musical instrument—but not in the well-known manner. Play a cello tucked under your chin, a saxophone with mallets, or piano as a string instrument with a bow, that sort of thing. The more unexpected the utilization, the more points. -David Pogue

#198 / PHOTO / 108 POINTS / CHANGE A LIFE. "It gives me hope. I feel special when I'm doing it. If something bad happens to me, all I have to do is dance..." -Timarandarin (14 years old) / Last year gishwhes worked with the charity Random Acts and Giles Duley’s Legacy of War to forever change the lives of three refugee families by raising over $250,000 in just a few days. Anybody who has seen these families' smiles will know what an incredible impact we had working together. / This year, we are teaming up with Random Acts and Legacy of War again to grant the last wish of a dying woman, and in doing so, we will save the dreams of hundreds of children who live in some of the world's poorest conditions. / Fiona Sargeant, a former ballet dancer from England, founded and runs a ballet school in an impoverished township in South Africa that for years has provided ballet instruction, meals, education, safe refuge and ultimately hope for hundreds of children. She is not a doctor, nor running a large foundation or charity, but she does know how to dance and she wanted to give back to the world. She is the living proof that EVERYONE can make a difference, if their heart is behind what they’re doing. / Sadly, Fiona has terminal cancer and only has weeks to live. Once she passes, she expects the school to be shut down. But there is a plan in motion that, if funded, would carry on her legacy. Let’s grant her dying wish and BY THE END OF THE HUNT let her know that her children will be taken care of long after she is gone. / She has no idea we are going to do this! We are going to surprise her with this colossal random act of kindness at the end of the Hunt! / We’ve created a Crowdrise page here that tells her story. DONATIONS ARE 100% TAX DEDUCTIBLE AND 100% OF THE DONATIONS GO TO THE SCHOOL (for countries other than U.S., deductions are contingent on your laws). The Gishwhes Item here: create a fundraising “page” for your team on Crowdrise where family, friends and others can donate. Since this is Gishwhes and there’s always an extra twist with everything we do, here’s the deal: we also want you to get OTHERS to donate to your team’s Crowdrise page. We know you don’t need “points” as an incentive to help these kids, but since it is part of the Hunt, we want to maximize the power of these points to help. / Here’s your assignment: start a page and get at least 10 donations from people or businesses NOT on your team. You and your team members are welcome to donate to your campaign, but that is not a requirement for points— the Item requirement is to get at least 10 people to make a cumulative total of least 10 donations who are NOT on your team. There is no minimum amount to donate for GISHWHES purposes, but Crowdrise does require a minimum $10 donation be collected, and let’s all please encourage others to be generous above this so we can make a profound impact. SUBMIT a screenshot of your team’s page with a minimum of 10 donations on it. (To initially create a fundraising team, click the “Join the Team & Create Your Own Fundraiser“ button.) // UPDATE: You reached the goal of $150,000 in just TWO DAYS. Now we need to make it to $200,000… If we can do THAT, we will be able to fund multiple scholarships for the students, allowing them to travel to other countries to train, compete, and take their experiences and skills back to South Africa! If anyone can make it happen, it’s the gishwhes family… So let’s do this & make some dreams come true!

#199 / PHOTO / 44 POINTS / Breaker, breaker! Tune in for details: CB Channel 27 (Frequency 27.27500) broadcasting near Lacy Park, San Marino, CA. (Latitude: 34.1204167 Longitude: -118.1201348) DATE & TIME: 8/7 12 PM PDT & 4:30PM PDT or 8/9 9 AM PDT. Listen on Broadcast CB CHANNEL 32 (Frequency 27.32500) broadcasting near Hermann Park Conservancy, Houston TX (Latitude: 29.7160286 Longitude: -95.3886413) DATE & TIME: 8/11 NOON CT

#200 / PHOTO / 72 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! She should run! First, research upcoming local, state, and federal elections in your area. Second, nominate, via social media posts, qualified female citizens you think should run for specific elected offices in those upcoming elections based on their qualifications and/or passion. Make a post on any or all of your social media handles, tag them (so they see it!), and explain why you want them to run, using the hashtag#SheShouldRun. But your nomination post is not what you submit on our site! IF you manage to get a woman to publicly commit to running in the next election cycle this week via their social media, submit two images side-by-side: an image of your post “nominating” them to run, next to an screenshot of their social media post committing to run, and provide a link to their post in the comments field of the submit page. Note: Candidate must not have already announced their intent to run for office. We have assigned a special prosecutor to scour the internet for your candidate’s previous declarations of intent-to-run and will vet them.

#201 / PHOTO / 61 POINTS / Outside US: 00-1-323-645-0703 Within US: (323) 645-0703

#202 / PHOTO / 46 POINTS / A gisher wrote me recently stating, “I started gishwhes in 2015 myself and my children all joined in and had the best week of our lives, so much fun, so much love, so much laughter. In December 2015 I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer… But I didn't let it beat me. We signed up for gishwhes 2016 and made beautiful art together and performed many acts of kindness to those around us and in need, my children now 10 & 8 have those lessons in their hearts now, to spread kindness and love to all around them! Unfortunately I am too sick to participate this year, but hope to still be here to see all the wonderful creations everyone makes, and if I'm not still here when gishwhes starts I will be watching down on you all, cheering everyone on.” Obviously, I cried when I read that. We emailed her back, but haven’t heard back… So this one's for you, S. (and your kids), with love from me & everyone in the gishwhes family: Find a local hospital or cancer center and coordinate with them to deliver a comfort bag(s) to a patient. Fill a cheerfully decorated canvas or cloth bag with items to provide palliative relief and comfort to a cancer patient: soft eye masks, scarves, a soft blanket, socks, ginger tea or candy, unscented natural lip balm, sudoku or coloring books, puzzles, poems, etc. Include a note of support or encouragement if you wish. (Please don't say "get well soon.” Phrasing like, "we're sending you our love" is better.) Please do not take a picture with the recipient... Just the bag. We trust you to deliver.

#203 / PHOTO / 40 POINTS / THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Bearby Von Bearamucci has an interview for a position as White House Communications Director on Saturday, August 12th at 8pm ET sharp! He was all set to drive the Gishbus across the country, but its engine wouldn’t start and he has a terrible fear of flying. He’s counting on gishers to help get him from Redding, California to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington, DC before his appointment (by passenger car or truck only. NO PLANES, TRAINS, SHIPPING SERVICES, OR BUSES). Your instructions are here. Coordinate with other gishers to pick up Bearby and take him at least 5 miles, but no more than 100 miles, from your starting point. On your leg of the journey, post a pic of you, Bearby, and the gisher you’re handing him off to at a diner, rest stop, or point of interest (please geo-tag the location). Tag @gishwhes, the next gisher, and @BearbyVonB and use hashtag #GetTheBearThere. You MUST hand Bearby off to the next gisher to complete your Item or you get zero points. Submit your photo with Bearby to us and provide a link to your post in the comments field of the submit page. You will get 40 points if you take a picture with Bearby and a sign with your team name on it, or 60 points if you take a photo with Bearby and transport him (please include side-by-side image of the map points as well). If he makes it to his appointment at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in D.C. by 8 PM ET on August 12th, you will get an additional 50% in points (for a grand total of 60 points for photo only, 90 points for photo + transportation). Yes, we know how convoluted this item is and that it seems destined for failure— but I believe you’ll spit in failure’s eye and say, “Not today!” Sidebar: gishwhes HQ nearly came to blows as we debated over whether providing maps and tools to help facilitate your journey was “helping” and therefore “cheating”, but after a rousing bout of coleslaw-wrestling, “Team Give Them Maps” claimed creamy victory, and so you may use these resources to help you coordinate the journey. But feel free to ignore the map entirely. Because you’re better than that. IMPORTANT NOTES: 1. Members of the same team cannot collect multiple submissions for this item. 2. Make sure other teams get the chance to help Bearby! Yes, this means you can communicate and walk the line of “collaboration” in your hand-off attempts. 3. Individuals transporting Bearby must take him at least 5 miles or up to 100 miles in one trip. 4. You may NOT take him near your homes. We have a GPS locator on Bearby (due to past felonies) so we don’t want to compromise your home locations. 5. Do not exceed the speed limit by more than 5 miles per hour, because that’s what the cops are cool with, obviously. This isn’t Cannonball Run. Make it happen, gishers. Bearby is counting on you to help him land his dream job! // UPDATE: Mileage limit increased from 50 to 100 mile trip.

#204 / PHOTO / 40 POINTS / Escape Gishwhes! https://www.gishwhes.com/escape-room/. If you manage to break out of this wild ride of mystery and mayhem, you’ll be prompted to enter your Team Name to document your success via an online form. BEFORE YOU HIT THE SUBMIT BUTTON, take a screenshot showing your team name in the Text Input Field and save the image, THEN hit the SUBMIT button. Your submission will be uploading the screenshot on our item list (backed up by what the online form sends gishbot).

#205 / PHOTO / 28 POINTS / We've received a bit of criticism that the hunt is "not really a scavenger hunt, it's just Misha getting people to help him with his chores." I'm honestly shocked anyone would say that! Also, people have been complaining that there are "too many geographically specific items" (items that require you to show up at a certain place). I want you to know that I'm listening and processing your feedback! So, I'm adding the following item: Help me help you help me help myself. Show up at 10 AM PDT sharp on August 11th at this location in Bellingham, WA. Wear long sleeves (pants and shirt) and bring a small bucket. Pick at least ONE quart of blackberries and DEPOSIT them into my big vessel so I can make lots of jam. For the item submission you must do two things: 1) You must find the woman in the sock monkey hat with the sheet of paper who is taking down team names and 2) You must take a photo of yourself with your bucket of berries. We will cross-check our list with your submitted photo as your proof. No taking pictures with me, because last year we did that and it ended up taking forever. If no one one on your team lives nearby, you may assign a surrogate, but no surrogate may service more than one team.

#206 / PHOTO / 17 POINTS / We got this letter to our support gnomes:

Name: [REDACTED]

Message : Hello Gishpeople. I want to question why there are so many specific-locations-that-aren't-Sweden only items, and no Sweden only items. I speak for all Swedes when we say that we find this very saddening. We don't understand how you could miss out on an opportunity like this, since Sweden is a very beautiful country, containting great things such as Dalahästar.

We, as a nation, expect a formal apology for this, of course.

All our love, and some sad wonders,

[REDACTED]

Sweden, you're absolutely right! You are a beautiful country and it's time we stopped overlooking you. You deserve a formal apology as requested and so in the interest of international diplomacy, it's our duty to deliver and rectify this egregious oversight. With that in mind, (I hope you'll forgive me but this is a location-specific image to appease Sweden, guys): Take a picture of yourself in front of the biggest landmark or point of interest in your town while holding a beautiful hand-lettered sign that reads, "We Are Sorry, Sweden". This is a location-based item, so you may do this anywhere in the world... except Sweden.

#207 / PHOTO / 48 POINTS / Nothing says "good life choices" like a last-minute rush job tattoo. Get inked with a tattoo that includes "We create therefore we live" or another gishy quote written in any language other than English. Feel free to adorn it with mascots or other hunt-inspired iconography. PS: Don't try to repurpose an old tattoo— we'll be able to tell and your team will be docked points.

#208 / PHOTO / 18 POINTS / As you know, no one was able to successfully find Jared Padalecki or Jensen Ackles' balls in Canada. Misha's balls are a lot easier to find... maybe because they really get around. Find Misha's balls in any of the following locations & take a picture with them. Then put them back EXACTLY where you found them so another team can have a chance to get their hands on Misha's balls, too. LOCATIONS: near the Cathedral Basilica, Newark, NJ; outside Gatorland, Orlando, FL, near Rothko Chapel in Houston, Texas.

#209 / PHOTO / 77 POINTS / Gishwhes is over tonight! Forever! The crumbs of the great multi-year, wild and weird global feast are soon to be all that's left. Let's see you work magic on these crumbs (real bread crumbs or whatever other crumbs you wish to use) and turn them into a portrait of actor Misha Collins. -the Gish Gnomes

[crimsxnflxwerz]

Like The Dawn [ch.2]

Rating: Teen+ Summary: Sometimes it takes opening your eyes to find what you’re looking for.[ or Persephone gets reborn as a baby boy named Ryan, and Hades takes the human form Shane in a desperate attempt to find his love once again. ] Pairing: Ryan/Shane Tags: greek mythology, Hades and Persephone, reincarnation, oblivious Hades is oblivious, memory loss Author Note: This is both my own take on the classic Greek myth of Hades and Persephone and how reincarnation in Gods work and such. Original ideas stemming heavily from mythological texts.

ps. i changed Ryan to a transguy when i edited the story for a03, so that’s canon now! hope it doesn’t turn anyone off ;;v;;. also, Sara’s in the fic because she deserves to be in ever fic. happy thanksgiving!

Ryan was drowning.

Maybe drowning wasn’t the best word for it. He’d been walking along the dark shore of a vast, choppy river, bare feet walking delicately on thousands of small, round pebbles. The horizon was a white light that bled up into a black sky like a watercolor painting. There were no stars, no moon, no sounds but the waves lapping at the rocks. He’d been walking for miles, but he wasn’t tired. He’s been watching the water for hours, but the image hadn’t changed. The light stayed the same, the air remained chill, the darkness absolute.

And he had walked into the water like it was the most normal thing he could have been doing. As soon as his foot touched the water, it felt like he’d been bitten. Like a thousand teeth were piercing his skin. The water physically recoiled, moving as a single body, steam hissing upward.

He wasn’t drowning. Drowning would imply accident. This was no accident. He’d stepped into that black water to die, and that had been that. He could remember why he had done what he did, what he was escaping, but the pain in his chest outweighed the fear of the water. There was a voice in his ear.

“Once you do this, you cannot go back,” it said. “Unless he finds you, you may not return to what you once were.”

Ryan heard the words, but held his resolve. Eventually the water engulfed him, and he opened his mouth, letting it in. It felt heavy, and cold, but he couldn’t leave now. He’d made his choice, and that was to die.

The last thing he heard was a name, his name he thought, but it said, “Persephone.”

Ryan jolted awake. He looked around his bedroom, eyes scanning frantically for his clock. His eyes located it on the floor, probably knocked over at some point in the night. It’s neon blue digital numbers read 3:30 am. Sweat was covering his entire body, soaking through his pajama shirt and into his pillow. He threw the covers back away from his legs and sat up on the side of his bed.

Another dream about it. He stood shakily and went to turn his shower on. Another dream about drowning. He peeled his pajamas off and tossed them in his laundry basket as he waited for the water to warm up. What could the dreams mean, he thought, staring at himself in the mirror. He ran his fingertips along the thin surgery scars on his chest. They were pale enough by now to not be very noticeable. Maybe the dreams were from the shots. It didn’t make much sense, but he figured he might as well look it up later.

He hopped into the shower and washed all the sweat off his body, the hot water pouring down on his shoulders, loosening up his muscles. Despite having a general fear of water, he loved showers. He figured since you couldn’t drown in a shower, that it was relatively safe. They look less time, too. If he was feeling particularly timid about water one day, he could just get in and out and still feel clean.

Ryan had held a fear of water and drowning since he was a baby. His mother used to only fill the tub up an inch or else he would start screaming and crying. She had no idea why he would be afraid of the water, they both agreed that nothing had happened to him to justify the fear.

In middle school, Ryan’s friends liked to joke that he had died by drowning in a past life. Although he didn’t believe in that kind of thing, he always found himself feeling forlorn or lonely whenever the subject was brought up. And now, living on his own, the idea continued to haunt him, but this time through vivid nightmares.

Though he had a fear of water, it didn’t hinder his other loves. He loved exploring, writing, and filming. The first thing he did with his new laptop was set up his own Youtube channel. He only had his laptop camera, but he would talk for hours about conspiracy theories and things that he found on his many nature walks. He wasn’t very good at cutting his videos down, since he thought everything was pretty important, but he learned through trial and error. Then he got his first camcorder for his 16th birthday. It was small, but unlike his laptop camera, he could take it with him on his journeys. He documented everything he could, the videos gaining some more viewers now that the video wasn’t just of him.

He wasn’t bad looking, but it could get boring watching just someone’s face for almost an hour.

Today, he would be filming again before he went to work. Since graduating college, he hadn’t gotten any kinda job that really went along with his major. It was hard to find work in film, especially if the thing you wanted to film was myths, ghosts, and local legends. His job was to take calls and transfer information. Basically, a secretary. He wasn’t mad about it though. It wasn’t a hard job, it paid for his new recording gear, and it had good hours.

He got out of the shower and threw on some flannel, jeans, and boots. He wanted to go out in the woods today. He’d been researching fae and other mythical creatures that hung around wooded areas recently. In fact, he’d been kind of into reading mythology, too. It wasn’t that he thought the stories were real, they were too fantastic, too magic. Ryan did believe in some unexplainable things, but there had to be at least a little logic to it.

He was mostly interested in things like fairy rings. His mother had told him once that they were active spiritual zones, and they were caused by tiny spirits sleeping on the Earth. She said that she wasn’t sure if they were good or bad, they just were. He was hoping to find some of those today, maybe study them further.

As he walked from his apartment, he felt deep inside him that something about today was just—off. For lack of a better term. He wasn’t quite sure what was going to be off about it, maybe his gut was just fooling him or something. He held fast to his camera bag as he waited for the bus. He wasn’t in a bad part of town, but the bad feeling was making him a bit paranoid. He didn’t need to be in a bad part of town for something bad to happen, anyways. He sighed in relief when the bus pulled up and he paid with his bus pass.

The bus generally took him to work, so he felt a little out of place being so dressed down. At his job, he didn’t really need to wear a suit, but he did wear a button up and slacks, sometimes a tie. He looked around and saw that other people were wearing nicer things, carrying laptop bags and briefcases. He was glad that his stop wasn’t too far down the road.

Stepping off the bus brought on a sigh of relief. Ryan looked ahead, across the street, to the state park he had chosen to explore today. Along with the bone-deep fear of water, Ryan also had an uncanny relationship with nature. Ever since he was a child, both animals and plants have had connections with him. He could nurse any house plant back to health. Deer would approach him on his walks in the woods. Dogs and cats acted calmer around him, as if he had some kind of aura that spoke their language, like he was telling them that they were safe now. All the better for his journey in learning more about the world around him. He remembered once, when he didn’t have his camera, he had been approached by a fox. It sniffed his hand and trotted along behind him through his walk that day. It had been so magical, if only he’d caught it on camera.

He dug his camera out of the bag and flicked it on as he crossed the street. He figured he’d just take the first trail he saw, and soon spotted one that was marked with stones. As he stepped into the woods, the feeling from earlier came back, but he brushed it off yet again. There was no need to worry, right?

Sara: Do you wanna hang out at your place today?

Shane squinted at the screen of his phone. He looked at the clock, but remembered that he’d actually unplugged it last night, so it wasn’t on. Judging by the light outside, he’d have to guess that it was around noon. He rubbed his eyes with his fingertips and let out a small groan.

Six months. Six months, he’d been a human without going back down, even once. He’d never been in the overworld for this long at once. It was exhausting, really. As a human, in his human body, he needed to do things, like eat, and sleep. In the underworld, he never needed to do these things. Drink nectar for pleasure, bathe to pass time, and lay in his bed covered in furs to see if they still smell like her.  

Oh yes, he’d been in the overworld for six months, because he could have sworn he was getting close.

He wasn’t sure why he felt this way. There was no indication besides a tightness in his chest, an anxious feeling in his gut. His very soul reaching out, feeling hers reach back.

Shane: No, you know the rules. Corner café?

Since living in the overworld, Shane had discovered many things about humans. First of all, if you slip up and call yourself something like Hades, people don’t take you seriously. Shane did some searching on babynames.com to find an average kind of name for a male. Shane seemed like a pretty good name, and so that’s what he became. Eventually, it became natural to refer to himself as Shane, but in his slip up period, he hadn’t made any friends.

Well, he had made one friend.

Sara: okay fine… just so you know, your “rules” are dumb.

Sara was like a blessing. Shane had thought it was a good idea when he came up to the overworld to start his search via dating apps. Truthfully, he just didn’t know how or where to start searching, and he already had a curiosity about human dating, so he figured it wouldn’t hurt to try it out. He’d made a profile for himself, and the only person to actually respond and come through was Sara. They chatted online for hours at a time, and finally met up at a café.

Shane already knew that Sara wasn’t Persephone before they even physically met. He was sure that when he found her again, something in his chest would ignite. When he started messaging Sara, he’d been excited, but nothing seemed to click. They went on two dates before he told her this. Well, he told her that he didn’t think they were gonna work out, but followed it up with a friendship invitation, claiming he needed a friend because he was “new in town”. Sara had taken it really well, she almost seemed relieved when he asked if they could just be friends.

Shane: you know you like them ;) see you there.

Sara was interested in finding out more about him. She figured out quickly enough that he was looking for someone specific, not just anyone. Not someone he hadn’t met yet. Maybe it had been the faraway look in his eyes when his eyes happen to catch a bouquet of flowers. Maybe it was the desperate arch of his shoulders, always looking, head held up in search. Somehow, she knew, and she just wanted to help.

They were meeting today for coffee.

Shane threw on a flannel and sweater with jeans. Feeling comfortable, he grabbed his wallet and laptop bag. He discovered quite quickly that he couldn’t do much in the overworld without some form of currency, and apparently gold coins were a thing of the past, so he had to make due. He found a place that traded jewelry for cash, and happily traded some lesser crafts for enough money to live in the overworld. He left his apartment and walked down the street to the café to meet up with Sara. She lived closer to it, so she’d probably be there before him. He wondered if he should text her what he wanted, or just wait until he got there.

On his way to the café, he kept looking across the street at the state park. There was something about the park that was calling to him today. As he walked, the feeling grew stronger. He looked on curiously at the forest, wondering the world was trying to tell him something. If he did go into the park, what would he find there? The feeling was coming from an ancient part of him, one that has been searching for decades, for millennium, just to find her.

He managed to pull himself away for now, since he was nearly at the café, but it didn’t leave his mind.

The café door jingled when he entered, and he saw a girl life her head. She had short, curly hair was had been dyed a deep purple. She immediately beamed at him, waving him over. Shane came over and saw that she had a number on her table.

“Order something already?” he asked.

“Oh, don’t worry, I got you something,” she grinned. “You like tea, right?”

He blushed at the thoughtfulness. “Y-yeah, I love tea.”

“Oh! I’m glad I remembered, haha,” she said. “I got you tea. I figured, since I was already here…”

“That’s very nice of you,” he scratched the back of his neck. “Oh, how are you?”

Sara shrugged one shoulder and absently picked at a peeling bit of paint on the table. “Eh, I’m okay, better now that I have company!”

Shane moved his chair a little closer to her, draping an arm over her shoulder. “Oh, what happened?”

“Just another date fell through,” she muttered. “It’s so hard to find someone these days.”

“Oh yeah, tell me about it,” he laughed. She smiled up at him. Their conversation was interrupted by a server coming over and asking them if this was their order, and set down a tray. The tray had a steaming cup of tea, a mug of coffee, a bagel, and a bowl of yogurt with oats and fruit. Sara nodded enthusiastically, and the server left them, taking the number on their table.

“Is that all yours?” Shane asked, but then she handed him the bagel and cup of tea.

“Oops, looks like I got more food than I can eat…” she muttered, trying not to grin. Shane blushed.

“You didn’t need to get this…” he said, but smiled about it anyways. After making friends with Sara, Shane had realized how lonely he’d been all by himself for so long. It was good to have a friend. In the underworld, he never had any friends. Well, he didn’t try and make any either, but still.

“Well, I needed to pay you back for all those things you’ve done for me!” she insisted. Her hand ghosted over the necklace she was currently wearing. It was a small diamond moonstone on a silver chain. The moonstone was one of his favorite gemstones, and he basically hoarded them in his palace. They always gave off a calming aura, or at least it seemed like it. It reminded him of the underworld, or at least the good parts of it. Like standing on the white shore of the great river Acheron. Unlike Styx, Acheron was peaceful and pleasant. The yang to Styx’s yin.

He’d given her that necklace the day after they decided to just be friends. He wanted to thank her for sticking around. There weren’t many people who did that for him.

“Oh, you don’t have to,” he smiled, before spreading some cream cheese on his bagel. “But this bagel will do just fine.”

They talked for a bit, sipping their drinks and simply enjoying each other’s company. Eventually, though, the pull from earlier came back. Like a magnet in his gut, being attracted to something in the woods across the street. He gazed out the window, feeling himself zone out. He imagined his beautiful wife, the night before she killed herself. She was wearing a gorgeous crimson sheer dress, roses and sticks of red berries woven into her hair. The last place he saw her was when he had left her lounging on their bed, neck red from kisses, blinking sleepily up at him.

He shouldn’t have left her that night. He hadn’t been that busy, it could’ve waited, whatever it was. That had been so long ago. He’d let so many memories go, but not that one. Her dark eyes, heavy lashes, the curve of her body, the softness in her voice. It was all so clear, and yet, he had overlooked all the signs.

She hadn’t really been happy with him. There was always something calling her away. She was like a caged bird, a chained animal. She sang and smiled and laid down to be touched, but it was all for show. She might have loved him, but he wasn’t enough. He had never been enough, and he never would be. He didn’t own her, because no one could ever own such a spirit.

“Earth to Shane,” he was brought back by a hand waving in front of his face. Sara looked at him quizzically.

“Something on your mind, buddy?” she asked. He felt his chest tighten when he looked away from the window. He brought out his wallet and plucked out a few dollars.

“Hey, I gotta go, here’s some money for the tip,” he said, hurriedly.

“Wait, you’re leaving already?” she asked, looking a bit disappointed. She rolled with it, however, and called after him as he left the café. “Well, text me later, I guess!”

He looked into the woods across the street as he waited for the light to change. The feeling inside of him grew stronger the longer he stared. The feeling told him that she was close. She was there, in the woods.

“I don’t know if you’re really out there,” he whispered to himself. “But I’ll find you, I promise.”

[criscura]

Hmmmmmm did you ask permission to post someone else's art because how you posted that feels shady af

I’m going to answer as upfront and thoroughly as I can, and not the snarky way you asked this. There will be no cut--this is long and you have to read it.

I did not, for many reasons, some practical and some selfish.

Tumbling Down is a lot of things, but part of it is a thank you to all the awesome artists in OPM. I find prompts and pictures that are massively inspiring and make something around them as a way of giving back to the people who give a lot. 

The problem is, when I first started writing this, it was hard to track reblogs on art that you reblogged. That meant that if I just tagged on a chapter as part of a reblog, I couldn’t easily respond to people as they commented/shared/tagged/etc. and I’d end up ignoring them. (Though I’ll admit it, I’ve fallen off the bandwagon with answering. I never thought that this fic would get as much attention as it did and it’s hard to answer everyone the way they deserve. I do still look through every tag, comment, and reblog on each post, which would be VERY difficult if I’d reblogged someone else’s post, especially considering that much of the work that inspired me has thousands of notes).

The next obvious answer would be to reblog things without a picture, right? And just give a link to the inspiration and shout-out to the artist in the introduction to the chapter. The problem with that is that I never want someone to think that I created an inspired scene from scratch. I want the artist to get their credit. And I know that many times people don’t pay attention to forewords and jump right in, or if they do go to the original post they may only like and share my fic without doing so to the inspiration. That wasn’t okay either. The original needed to be permanently attached to my fic so that no one could ever ignore it.

So the next idea would be to download the image and put it at the start of every chapter with links to the original work and a shout-out to the artist. I didn’t like that though--it felt too much like I was presenting something that I had made, and then something written for it underneath it, and that’s gross. That’s unacceptable. 

SO. What I do is take a screenshot of the original piece so that at a glance you can tell that it is not my own piece, and use that as the image I share. In the screenshot I make sure you can see the artists/users’ icon, some part of their page, their blurb, and/or their tags so you could find them based on that alone. Then I tag the artist in the post so they get a notification of it, and post a link to the original piece immediately after so that people can more easily find it if they would like. This means that I’m putting up a post that I can follow, while making sure that it is very apparent that I drew inspiration from someone else’s work and providing links to it.

Now for the selfish part. No, I do not ask them beforehand if they are alright that I do it, because some artists aren’t on for months at a time and I cannot wait that long to post something. And no, I will not not post it. 

This fic is a thank you, but it’s also my own project, and I will work on it on my own time. Additionally, I will not just use other prompts that I’ve gotten the “okay” on. 

This has been mostly planned for about a year, with certain prompts and artworks as contenders for milestone events, but that I won’t know which ones are absolutely the right choice until I’ve gotten to writing them....and since my timeline is fluid, I have absolutely no idea if or when I’ll be using those prompts. For example, the last chapter I just posted? I had that saved as inspiration since February...of 2016. I badly wanted to write that in somehow, but I’m not going to ham-fist a scene into the story just because I happen to like it a lot. Had ket3′s picture not worked with the rest of the chapter, I would’ve gone with something else, but I wouldn’t know if it would work until I had the chapter almost entirely written out. To explain why I don’t want to wait to post chapters or edit them once they’re done, you have to understand the amount of work that goes into each one. 

One chapter is anywhere from 10,000 to 16,000 words. That’s....what, about 30 pages to 50 pages written. It takes me roughly a week/week and a half to write that, with the many many many hours of research that goes into each chapter. I reread each draft at least a dozen times (but probably far more than that) between short edits (rereading what I just did to center myself), long edits (combing through the entire chapter for tone/repetition/etc.), and hard edits (printing out a copy and physically editing so I can see the draft with a fresh set of eyes). Once it’s completed, I need to go into my phone to find the screenshot of the original piece and track down the artist/user as well as a link to the work itself. If the original screenshot didn’t give me enough information to easily find the artist, I take a new one that will show their icon/page/tags/etc. Then I use that to post the chapter, with all the links included. If I can’t track down the artist, then and only then will I change what I was going to write so that I don’t step on any toes. (Yes, I’ve had to do it. I have also realized I drew inspiration from something after the fact, and updated the fic/contacted the artist once I realized it.) By the time you see a chapter come up, I’ve already spent anywhere from two to three weeks on it. I am not going to wait months, potentially, to hear back from someone on whether or not it can go up, and then need to rewrite it all.

NOW. While I could physically go through my inspiration folder to track down, contact, and wait for a response from every artist that has ever inspired me in the chance that I choose to write for their piece, it would take an ENORMOUS amount of time and effort due to the sheer quantity of things I have saved. I would spend more time preparing for scenes I may never write than writing the fic itself, and I am not willing to do that. 

That’s not to say I don’t take the artist’s personal preferences into account when I’m writing. I am, for instance, incredibly inspired by cinensis’ work, but I won’t let myself use any of his work due to my fic’s (highly) sexual nature. It would be disrespectful. When I look at a piece of art, I try to take into consideration the feel, tone, and setting, and apply it to my fic as best I can. I am not going to rip something from an artist out of context and just plop it into my own art--I will spend a year working up to something if that’s the only way I can do a piece of art justice (I’ve done it several times and I will continue to do it until the fic is done).

Should an artist ever reach out to me and say, “Please remove my picture from this, I don’t like that,” I would apologize and fix it as best as I could, which--again, selfishly--would not included editing the scene out. I would, though, remove their picture from it and include a MASSIVE disclaimer at the start saying that I’d messed up, explaining why I’m reposting my chapter without the art, and ask that everyone who reads it respects the artist’s wishes. I understand that that’s cruel. I’m taking a big risk doing it that way. However....

I have been writing this for over a year and a half, and that has never happened. I take a HUGE amount of precautions to make sure I don’t offend/bother/irritate anyone, and that if I use someone else’s work as inspiration, it’s shown in a respectful and positive light that will (hopefully) help others appreciate it just as much as I do, and lead them to thinking more about the art/artist. And before you ask, I have actually drawn from ket3 before--twice. They were thankful/flattered/glad both times. 

I am sure this answer is unsatisfactory to you. I’m sorry to have bothered you, but I’m at peace with how I manage this fic and I will be the one to decide if and when I need to change the way I share it.

[lotrspnfangirl]

Gishwhes 2017 - CultofCaffeine

This years Gish was just as much fun as previous years! I think I had the most fun this year being able to gish with my best friends (Alex and @cassondrawinchester​) as well as a lot of the girls I did it last year with! We had an excellent team, and I made a few new friends, and we got up to some crazy stuff.

I think the highlight this year was getting to scare the crap out of my dad and despite some questionable 'cult like' behavior, we weren't arrested. So, win on that one! And meeting @pherryt​ at the Gish get together!!! 

Now, the reason you're all actually here... Here is our team's submissions!

#2  There was a hobby or talent that you used to do when you were younger that you stopped doing for whatever reason. Do it again. Now.

#4  As anyone who reads “Cosmopolitan” magazine knows, bohemian eco-chic weddings are all the rage. Let’s see a wedding dress made from recycled office paper.

#6 Re-enact the experience of your birth, using (only) shadow puppets.

#8  The year is 2021. Of all the unique and amazing human specimens on Earth, it was hard for the aliens to choose which ones to collect, but your team stood out as being excessively weird & worth “analysis". Your entire team was abducted and put into an alien specimen box. In grid form, show each member of your team along with a card explaining where they got you (city, country) and a word stating what special characteristic makes you unique.

#9 I can assure you, THAT has never been frozen in jello before! How did you manage to do that?!

#10  Pizza was invented in Italy in 997 AD to honor the Queen Consort, Queen Margherita. The next significant event in Italian history was the start of the Renaissance Period in the 14th century, which spawned a revival in art, architecture, science and learning. Let’s celebrate these two seminal moments in Italian history. Bake a Pizza decorated as a Renaissance painting that would make the Old Masters proud.

#12  Many of us have lost pets in our lifetime. As a memorial to a loved pet that is now frolicking in the clouds chasing or sniffing whatever it was that pet liked to chase/sniff, write a poem or haiku about that loved one, or create a small shrine in nature comprised of items the pet loved and a photo of him or her.

#13 (Side by side) A child drawing of their idea of happiness. Then, make it happen.

Stormy misses her grandma who lives in Kentucky and what would make her happiest is if she was able to come to visit her!

#14 Over the years gishwhes has always been a supporter of first responders (firemen, paramedics, ER medics, nurses, police, etc.). Let’s give them one last treatment of a proper gishwhes “THANK YOU!” Find your nearest and dearest first responders and bring them The Most Epic Cookies or Pastries the World Has Ever Seen (MECOPWHES).

#15 Groucho Marx a piece of fruit. No, we don’t know what this means either, but we’re excited to see what you come up with.

#17 Spicy Art! Using the spices you have in your spice cupboard, make a picture of your favorite (1) comic book cover, or (2) cartoon character. Either submit it alone, or as a side-by-side image comparison.

#19 (Side-by-side image) A photo of your pet and a photo of the portrait of your pet that you have made from their own food and treats.

#20 This family’s toys get into sweet, crazy escapades at night while the kids are sleeping. Your family’s toys make that family’s toys look like do-gooders. Let’s see what happened with your family’s toys while you slept last night.

#22 We finally have a confirmed sighting of a mythical beast from urban legends (Bigfoot, Nessie, Yeti, etc.) suffering the effects of climate change.

#23 This morning, my daughter, Maison reported having seen a “moon fairy” while I was sleeping last night. As you know, the rarely-seen moon fairies are mischievous, nocturnal creatures who participate in synchronized, representational flight. Using a long exposure and flashlights (or other movable light sources) photograph these elusive beasts.

#24 She wore a raspberry beret… Wear a beret made out of raspberries as you shop in a second-hand store.

#26 (Create an old-school STOP MOTION film - up to 1 minute.) A Romeo and Juliet story... Two young virile socks (unmatched) meeting, falling in love, being kept apart and finally ending tragically.

#29 It is either winter or summer where you are. (If it is not, please contact our support so we can send NASA to find you.) There’s something you love to do outdoors in the winter or summer where you live. Do the activity you love to do in the opposite season that you are in.

#30 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! NEW LEASH ON LIFE USA adopts otherwise unadoptable dogs and sends them through a unique training program. Shelter pets rarely get any attention and millions are put down each year. Many times this can be avoided if people on the Interwebs (who would like and could responsibly own a pet) were to see how cute, available, lonely and cuddly they are. Let’s save a pet or two (or thousands). Grab a friend or two and visit a shelter. Spend some time with one or more of the pets there. Post a selfie of your favorite pet looking for a “forever home” on Twitter (tagging @NewLeashUSA) or Instagram (tagging @NewLeashOnLifeUSA), using hashtag #adoptmeplease, and the social media handle or name of the shelter (so people can contact them). Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post link in the comment field of the submit page.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BXtiZY5ADuC/

#34 As this is likely the last year of gishwhes we should probably do something to memorialize it. A lot of folks have been saying, “Save gishwhes!” But we say, “Shave “gishwhes”... into the back of your head.” Try to match the amazing logo that Olivia Desianti formed way back when - which we still use today. Bonus points if you include the current or a former gishwhes hybrid mascot in your masterpiece. The same design shaved into a thick matt of back or chest hair would be an acceptable substitute.  A little red lipstick makes this pop!

#35 Hand a bouquet of flowers (or a single flower) to a person leaving a house of worship that is not your religion. For example, if you are a Christian, you could hand a bouquet of flowers to someone leaving a mosque. If you’re Jewish, hand flowers to someone at a Christian church, etc. With the flowers, attach a note saying something in your own words, but to the effect of: “I may not worship in the same building as you, and I may not pray to the same prophets, but I am grateful to be sharing this planet with you in peace.”

#36 The dewey decimal system has long been responsible for keeping good books apart— books that clearly deserve to spend a life together on library shelves. For that matter, it seems so many libraries go out of their way to keep perfectly good literary companions apart as they separate fact from fiction, biography from archaeology, science fiction from politics. Be the matchmaker literature needs and get creative at your local library or bookstore. Show the spines of at least six books together in a library or bookstore (the more titles the better) the titles of which create the perfect oxymoronic sentence or phrase. - Monica Duff Teacher says, When you reach me this dark endeavor revealed first lights glow.

#37 No one talks about the fact that the destruction of the Death Star put thousands of Stormtroopers out of work. Luckily the Empire has a pretty robust social safety net and most of them have been retrained and placed in new jobs, the majority of which have been in the transportation sector. Let’s see a stormtrooper driving/flying a large passenger vehicle. Must be for mass transit, not just a car or a van. A subway, train, bus, ferry, plane, etc.

#38 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Pick a celebrity social media image post (or an advertisement) and recreate it with a subtle twist like like Celeste Barber does here. Tweet, Instagram or FB post your image side-by-side with the original image, “#embracereality @gishwhes” and your team name. (You may also tag or mention the celebrity or brand you are satirizing.) Submit the image you take side-by-side with the original one, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

https://twitter.com/courie969/status/896455455656075265

#41 Show us your own personal “Stairway to Heaven” -Dylan Cacador

#42 You ever heard of “pond dipping”? “river bugging”? Neither have we - but let’s not let that stop us. Invent and show off your own *SAFE* summer wet, wild and messy activity and caption it with a clever name.

#43 Never judge a book by its cover… or bread by its shape. Bake bread or cookies into the shape of something you would DEFINITELY not want to eat. (We hate to have to say this every year, but pornographic pastries will result in docked points.)

#46 THE FINAL “KALE” ART. (Please note that per Commandment #4 of the 2017 Hunt, this word and material as a Hunt item is not permitted. We are aware of this. That being said, we do not care. You still may not use the word “kale”. Henceforth, it shall be called [REDACTED] BUT you may use it as a material for this item.) Therefore, take a SINGLE glorious piece of [REDACTED] and, using whatever adornments or other decoratives, clipping patterns, etc., create a stunning, museum worthy piece of art that shall then be showcased (and submitted as such) as an ornamental headpiece on you.

#48 As most people know, roosters enjoy a good sunrise. But other farm animals enjoy sunrises and sunsets, too. Let's see a photo of you, some friends or companions (such as your dog), and a sheep, horse, cow, or other non-rooster barnyard animal, watching the sun rise or set together. Bonus points if the spectacular skies are reflected in water in front of you.

#49 There’s something important that your local or national politicians are not attending to properly. Stand in front of something that represents the issue/right/minority group/etc. that you care about and that your politicians are not adequately protecting and hold a large, hand-written sign with a message to the powers that be. Tweet this image to an elected official with the power to do something to help tagged “#gishwhesrights”. Submit the image and a link to your tweet in the comments.

https://twitter.com/casschindler/status/895052460682878976

#51 Anyone who serves in the military is risking their life to serve their nation. Being respectful to not trespass on military grounds, stand in front of a large military craft, ship, tank, or plane with an inclusive sign of thanks to every service member of every kind. You may post this image on social media prior to the end of the hunt, if you choose. Submit the image with a link to your post in the comment section (if you chose to post it). https://twitter.com/casschindler/status/895053091153874945

#52 (Time-lapse up to 30 seconds.) Paint a dignified portrait of a President, Prime Minister, King, or Queen. But we don’t want you to waste canvas or paper! Paint this on a loved one’s bare back or abdomen. (use skin safe paints or edible “paint-like” food products!)  (ignore my side boob...) 

#53 Write something in frosting on a cake that you’ve always wanted to say to someone, and deliver it to them.

#54 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Listen to this and be scared: http://www.radiolab.org/story/nukes/. But this bill has been introduced to try to solve this global risk. Let’s get it approved! Tweet ALL of your reps to pass the legislation to make congressional approval for first nuclear strike US law. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide a link to the tweet in the comment field of the submit page. https://twitter.com/lotrspnfangirl/status/894801114641649665

#56 Sometimes things are just too comfy to leave, but you’re prepared for this! Let’s see you in your “Hammock Self-Containment Unit”. This, of course, would be you in a hammock with everything you need to live for one week, including all life preserving items, sanitation supplies and, of course, entertainment (live or otherwise). Make sure it’s clean, well organized, and designed for easy access to everything.

#62 Honeybees are a “keystone” species just like sharks. If they’re gone, we’re in big trouble. Unfortunately, there are currently “Colony Collapse Disorders” happening with honeybees throughout the world. This is when the majority of worker bees in a colony disappear, leaving the queen and immature bees to fend for themselves (most colonies completely die). This has major global food crop implications, as honeybees perform the magic of pollination of agricultural crops. If bees go by the wayside, we will have to find alternative pollination solutions, and that ain’t gonna be easy. But, let’s roll up our sleeves and give it a shot: Plant something in your garden (or plant a garden if you don’t have one) that is bee friendly (even if it’s just one plant in one pot on a patio). Spring - lilacs, penstemon, lavender, sage, verbena, and wisteria. Summer – Mint, cosmos, squash, tomatoes, pumpkins, sunflowers, oregano, rosemary, poppies, black-eyed Susan, passion flower vine, honeysuckle. Fall – Fuschia, mint, bush sunflower, sage, verbena, toadflax. Take a picture of yourself wearing some sort of bee-attire doing your part to pollinate your newly planted plant.

#66 Personify your favorite movie title. Include a caption on your image of the title of the movie in quotes. - Tanya Best

#67 Banana Hammock. This year’s summer fashion elitists are all wearing the latest rage: Banana Bikini or Banana Briefs. Join them!

#68 You finally have a use for all the naked bananas you now have sitting around! Bake as much banana bread as you can with “gishwhes” spelled out in bananas on the top & distribute it to your local nursing home.

#73 Visit a local laundromat. Place decorated envelopes with enough money (in coins or bills, depending on the machines) for one load of washing and one load of drying on at least one machine with the note: “We swim together, we tumble together. Love, Gishwhes.” 

#75 They told me I couldn’t, so I did. Pose in front of a sign declaring a rule. Break that rule. A few notes: It must be safe (what you are doing), and it MUST NOT be a law or illegal where you are. It must only be a “rule”. For example, you might find a sign that says, “collared shirts only.” You would pose in front of that sign wearing a tank top. - Inspired by Emily Shulman

#75 Personify or embody your team name. Caption your image with your team name. - Shannon

#81 Sometimes it feels like your boss expects you to be in more than one place at more than one time, but you’re a gisher so you know how to deliver. Using the panoramic photo function on your phone, insert yourself at least three times in the same picture in different positions and/or wardrobe to show yourself as you “multitask”. You may NOT Photoshop yourself into the image. (Hint: you have to run around the person taking the picture each time they pass you in the frame.)

#82 In honour of Canada's 150th birthday, even though you may not be Canadian, you and a friend should clearly cover yourself in maple syrup and go roll in some maple leaves. - Jessica G.

#83 Lets see your interpretation of fireworks using vegetables and spaghetti as mixed media. - Saty381

#84 (Two Images side-by-side.) The first image is a photo of an illustrated page from a children’s book. The second image is your reenactment of that illustration in 3 dimensions. - Inspired by Sarah Trumbley

#85 Let’s see LABSWHES. The Largest Awesome Balloon Sculpture the World Has Ever Seen. The themes this year are “insect” or “space”—or both. You must be in the middle of this structure.

#86 Everyone thinks unicorns are beautiful, magical, gentle creatures. You know better. Prove it to the world! You may use any media you like, including Photoshop. - Traci Akierman  (( this is everything to me )) 

#89 Apply lipstick while jumping on a trampoline. - Emily Schulman

#91 Leave a Yelp review of gishwhes after you deliver food to the homeless or to a homeless shelter.

#101 As I'm sure you’ve seen, over the years we have marketed gishwhes relentlessly and shamelessly (because we really want everyone to do it). This is the last gishwhes, so now it’s your turn to go ahead and show us how we should’ve marketed it. Create a gishwhes ad that no one would be able to resist. Note: you may make false or misleading claims if you so choose, but because we’re curious, you could even take a stab at a legit one.

#102 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! During the First Annual and Last Ever 2017 gishwhes Tea Party, we identified gishers based on their right-brush or left-brush toothbrushing statuses. Conduct a massive poll on your social networks for the gishwhes Institute of Vital Statistics to prove conclusively whether people brush their teeth starting on the same side of their mouth as their dominant hand or the opposite side. Because this is solid science, your sample size must have a minimum of 400 respondents. Submit a visually-compelling graph of your poll data and the number of votes and the winner. Use the hashtag #gishwhesteeth. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSflbQIfXAgyMfW0lpqMRT9UdReh7v1T2Iec-RYyLg-WK68LzQ/viewform

#105 We know a little girl that makes a different kind of Advent Calendar. As she marks off each day on the calendar, she gives something away. Make your own version of a reverse Advent calendar. On the first day of gishwhes, create a decorated Advent calendar whereby, for each day on the calendar, you depict something you’re going to give away. Then, each day of the Hunt, take a picture of you fulfilling your calendar item. Submit 7 pictures in a grid (or a video slideshow) showing what you’ve done. Then, continue on through the calendar period. (Yes, this will continue after the Hunt is over, but though gishwhes as we know it may be ending, its spirit will live on in you!) -Keegan Connor Tracy’s 10-year old daughter

#109 (Up to 22 seconds.) Wonder Woman being “Superman-splained” to.

#119 Trump l’oeil. (This is not a typo.)

#123 As all gishers know, Saturday, August 12 is “Meet Another Gisher Day.” Meet up in front of the largest art museum in your town at 10:00 AM (of whatever timezone you’re in). It’s a pot-luck coleslaw brunch this year, so bring your favorite family recipe of coleslaw… and as much sidewalk chalk as you can. After brunch, decorate the pavement with a collaborative message to the world. In order for a meet-up to count you need to have representatives of at least 5 teams present, so this will require some organizing. Gishwhes is all about coming together, so teams may collaborate (gasp!) on this one, but your team’s image or video must still be all your own.

#124 Be someone’s “rock” to get them through the hard times. Hand-paint small rocks with a message of kindness & leave them in areas that need a pick-me-up. (On the underside, please write “Pass it on.”) You must paint & hide at least one rock for each member of your team.

https://youtu.be/LmptxuKay6o 

((it wont let me add more videos))  #125 (Time-lapse under 20 seconds.) All good things must come to an end, and so it is with the Hunt. Create a “sand” mandala featuring images that symbolize the hunt to you… all using pixie sticks as your chakpur and sand. When it’s done, show us your masterwork and then, just like the Buddhist monks, sweep it away and get ready for what’s next.

#130 A tactometer used to measure tact.

#131 Make a collage that features things only locals from your town would know about. Display it prominently in a public space in your town.

https://youtu.be/Qt_zCMi71M4

#134 My wife is so trend-forward, she recently took a “goat yoga class” (it’s real; you can google it.) Without hurting, upsetting, or endangering ANY animal, show us the next trend in animal-infused yoga that she should get on board with.

https://youtu.be/N3BF22b1ghs

#135 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! (Up to 30 seconds.) Freeze frame on a picture of you (like they do at the end of movies) and then roll a credit sequence for your own life. Include a "here’s what happens to you in the future" sentence or two and then a listing of the people that have helped you get where you are now or where you are going and what their “titles” are. Post this on the social media channel of your choice with the hashtags #gishwhes #mylife. Submit the video, and in the comment field provide the link to the post.

#143 Sure, most Stormtroopers toed the line, but back in the 1960s there were a few draft-dodging peacenik Stormtroopers. Find a famous vintage photo of a peace sit-in or Woodstock-level love-in and flawlessly photoshop in one or more Stormtroopers. We must think it’s the real thing. As an alternative, you can stage your own “peace” picture and submit an “aged” stormtrooper sit-in image. YES, YOU MAY PHOTOSHOP THIS ITEM!

#152 Decorate the exterior of your home like the Pan House, using whatever object speaks to you.

#157 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! NASA is soliciting tweets to send to Voyager 1. Tweet your suggestion with #gishwhes. I suggest it be the following theme: Voyager 1 ran to the store and you are texting to remind it to pick something up at the store. But we will permit messages of any type so let your imaginations run wild. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide a link to the tweet in the comment field of the submit page. 

#158 Thanks to “reactions” we can now communicate our feelings more clearly to one another! But Facebook limits us to just 6 reactions and we at gishwhes HQ believe that this limitation constraints our ability to express nuanced emotions to one another. Let’s see an updated version of the Facebook “reactions” with feelings like “silently judging you”, “reacting positively to your face but planning to gossip about this later”, and “I’m just not sure how to feel about this” and other more subtle emotions. You may photoshop this item.

#164 Get a bonafide zillow listing for property on Mars.

#165 https://twitter.com/zenxv/status/845474882607632384

https://youtu.be/3rXlzYEtP4k

#167 (Time-lapse up to 20 seconds.) There are two things that science has proven unequivocally: 1) global warming is happening and 2) sucking the melting ice cream from a tiny hole in the bottom of a sugar cone is the greatest possible pleasure in life. (Minimum 5 rounded scoops on top and you must suck all the ice cream through the tiny hole.)

#169 Write "Ass butt" (in non-toxic kids finger paint or chalk!) on the hindquarters of an Ass. (This should go without saying, but be careful & safe. Approach from the side, never stand directly behind it, and try to keep the donkey happy so you don't get injured.)

#172 Now that this may be the last gishwhes-as-we-know-it ever, it’s time to reflect on missed opportunities. Let’s see the Item List Misha SHOULD have made all these years. Give us your team’s ideal gishwhes Item List with a minimum of 10 Items. If the majority of the items you create look like no thought was put into them (and you were just quickly writing down items to get the points), you will receive zero points.

#173 Complete one of the more challenging items on your team’s homemade gishwhes Item List. 

https://youtu.be/mH2Hghjq6uc

#179 (Up to 45 seconds edited.) Share an audio dream diary of your first thoughts as you wake up every morning of the Hunt (so you cannot submit this until the last day of the Hunt!). It must be the first thing you do before you get out of bed.

#181 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Let’s see a (SFW) 2,000 word essay published on twitter in 140 character bursts. (no attachments, etc.) about the best way to get pregnant for the 10th time. (I’m sorry, but I promised someone this would be an item.) Submit an image of the first post and then a link to this post in the COMMENT field of the submit page so we can check to make sure you “published” the whole thing.

https://twitter.com/lotrspnfangirl/status/896606741143724033

#182 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Seamlessly modify using photoshop (or other digital altering software), a well-know oil painting by adding in an anachronistic element. For example, if it were a Monet, you might put one of the ladies under a parasol holding an ipad. YES, YOU MAY DIGITALLY ALTER THE IMAGE YOU ARE SUBMITTING… with a catch. The anachronistic element must be rendered seamlessly into the image in the style of the original painter or creator. It must look like a part of the original composition; we should not be able to tell it was added in later. Post the image on FB and/or Pinterest. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. #gishwhesModernMasterpiece

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/490892428124114391/

#183 You are all soon going to be a part of a sinister plot to take over the world… in a unique way. But we need your help. Here’s the first thing you have to do: Decide what your favorite point of interest, historical site or national landmark is in your town or city and enter its address here: http://qrickit.com/qrickit_apps/qrickit_qrcode_creator_geo.php . Below the map on that webpage you’ll see an “optional text” field. Enter “Taken by CFG”. Then click “Qcreate” at the bottom. Download the QR code and submit it as your item. Stay tuned for what comes next...

#186 One of the biggest problems astronauts will face when they travel to Mars will be figuring out how to bring enough food for the three year journey. Porcupanda has offered the idea of making their spacecraft out of food. Show them how. Build an edible spacecraft using anything except “space ice cream” (Per our resident Director of Intergalactic Space Exploration, that stuff tastes like strawberry Styrofoam: “Bleecht!” as he so eloquently put it.)

#187 Every year, the scientists at the NASA Jet Propulsion Lab make spectacular pumpkin carvings that put our humble Halloween jack-o-lanterns to shame (see https://www.wired.com/2016/10/watch-nasas-high-tech-pumpkins-action/). Whatever. What’s a rocket scientist got that you don’t have? Let’s see you out-do them! Show us your best and most outlandish WATERMELON-O-LANTERN carving. - Dave Lavery

#188 For many years, military aircraft sported spectacular “nose art”— artistic homages to people, places, and ideas important to the aircraft crew. As aesthetically appealing as aircraft nose art may have been, we think they botched it on the choice of canvas. Show us your best nose art - but this time, get it right! All art must be on, around, or incorporate, your nose.

https://youtu.be/N82SzhOV24k

#189 The World’s Worst Lawyer.

https://youtu.be/UwJtIh80M7I

#192 (Time lapse up to 25 seconds). In our busy world, people sometimes forget to slow down and see the beauty around them. Perform a task at work extremely slowly while everyone around you carries on at normal speed. When this is played back in in time lapse, you’re performing at normal speed and it’s the world around you that’s going too fast.

#196 THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! THIS IS A TOP SECRET ITEM! DO NOT SHARE ITS CONTENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA UNTIL DIRECTED OR YOU WILL RUIN THE SURPRISE AND BE DELUGED WITH BAD KARMA. By now, most of you may know our friend Giles Duley. If not, watch the video at the top of this page. Then, watch here to see what he did with us recently: https://youtu.be/-tOt9LfZF9w ...and he’s doing something amazing with us again with us this year (which we’ll be announcing VERY soon). Giles inspires us and we want to thank him for all of his hard (and often thankless) work. So, we’re going to thank him... BUT WE’RE GOING TO SURPRISE HIM! SO PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT POST ABOUT THIS UNTIL THE DESIGNATED TIME: On Friday, August 11th, at EXACTLY 9am PDT, we are going to give him a “thunderclap” of thanks on the Internet. Because Giles thinks EVERYONE can make a difference no matter their circumstances (and he’s a living embodiment of that), we’re going to prove it. Here’s your job: before the 11th, go out and do an act of kindness. But not just any act of kindness... Giles works hard to help refugee families and landmine victims, so your act of kindness should focus on expanding his work exponentially through the power of gishwhes and gishers. Do something that makes a meaningful, material difference in the life of either a refugee or someone who has been directly impacted by war. If you’re at a loss of how to do this, here are some suggestions: bring a care package to new refugees in your neighborhood, go to a refugee center and volunteer, bring a warm meal to a homeless veteran on the streets, volunteer at a soup kitchen where you know there are war veterans, make a donation to an organization that helps with reconstructive surgery and prosthetics for war victims, or sponsor a child made homeless by the war with a one-time or recurring donation. If you can’t manage to find or coordinate any of the above (but please try!), simply carry out a random act of kindness for another human being on the planet who could legitimately use some kindness. Dig deep on this one, guys. The goal is to cause a ripple effect from the work Giles is doing and expand it worldwide. Let's do this. Capture an image or video of this act. At 9am PDT on Friday, August 11th, post the image or video on Facebook with a detailed description of what you did and crosspost to Twitter. Be sure to mention Giles in the post. (For Facebook, tag @GilesDuleyPhotography and on Twitter, tag @gilesduley with #thanksGiles as the hashtag.) Submit the image or video you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post link in the comment field of the submit page.

#202 A gisher wrote me recently stating, “I started gishwhes in 2015 myself and my children all joined in and had the best week of our lives, so much fun, so much love, so much laughter. In December 2015 I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer… But I didn't let it beat me. We signed up for gishwhes 2016 and made beautiful art together and performed many acts of kindness to those around us and in need, my children now 10 & 8 have those lessons in their hearts now, to spread kindness and love to all around them! Unfortunately I am too sick to participate this year, but hope to still be here to see all the wonderful creations everyone makes, and if I'm not still here when gishwhes starts I will be watching down on you all, cheering everyone on.” Obviously, I cried when I read that. We emailed her back, but haven’t heard back… So this one's for you, S. (and your kids), with love from me & everyone in the gishwhes family: Find a local hospital or cancer center and coordinate with them to deliver a comfort bag(s) to a patient. Fill a cheerfully decorated canvas or cloth bag with items to provide palliative relief and comfort to a cancer patient: soft eye masks, scarves, a soft blanket, socks, ginger tea or candy, unscented natural lip balm, sudoku or coloring books, puzzles, poems, etc. Include a note of support or encouragement if you wish. (Please don't say "get well soon.” Phrasing like, "we're sending you our love" is better.) Please do not take a picture with the recipient... Just the bag. We trust you to deliver.

#204 Escape Gishwhes! https://www.gishwhes.com/escape-room/. If you manage to break out of this wild ride of mystery and mayhem, you’ll be prompted to enter your Team Name to document your success via an online form. BEFORE YOU HIT THE SUBMIT BUTTON, take a screenshot showing your team name in the Text Input Field and save the image, THEN hit the SUBMIT button. Your submission will be uploading the screenshot on our item list (backed up by what the online form sends gishbot).

#206 We got this letter to our support gnomes:Name: [REDACTED]Message : Hello Gishpeople. I want to question why there are so many specific-locations-that-aren't-Sweden only items, and no Sweden only items. I speak for all Swedes when we say that we find this very saddening. We don't understand how you could miss out on an opportunity like this, since Sweden is a very beautiful country, containting great things such as Dalahästar.We, as a nation, expect a formal apology for this, of course.All our love, and some sad wonders,[REDACTED]Sweden, you're absolutely right! You are a beautiful country and it's time we stopped overlooking you. You deserve a formal apology as requested and so in the interest of international diplomacy, it's our duty to deliver and rectify this egregious oversight. With that in mind, (I hope you'll forgive me but this is a location-specific image to appease Sweden, guys): Take a picture of yourself in front of the biggest landmark or point of interest in your town while holding a beautiful hand-lettered sign that reads, "We Are Sorry, Sweden". This is a location-based item, so you may do this anywhere in the world... except Sweden.

@cassondrawinchester

[teamgishtastrophe]

2017 GISHWHES - full item list

Below is the full list of items from GISHWHES 2017 with links to Team Gishtastrophe’s submissions.

#1 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

66 POINTS

Do you live near (or within a fun road trip’s length of) some sand dunes or a beach? If so, the time has come to fulfill your destiny. Make a massive portrait (must be larger than 20 square meters - the larger the better) of either someone who inspires you, or a message of hope beautifully written in sand. Use a drone to capture footage, if helpful. Make sure you are not working on protected or ecologically sensitive dunes.

    #2 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

20 POINTS

There was a hobby or talent that you used to do when you were younger that you stopped doing for whatever reason. Do it again. Now.

    #3 

52 POINTS

Pancake art has come a long way, and the art form doesn’t get the respect it deserves. Let’s see pancake art of Guernica, Judith Slaying Holofernes, The Weeping Woman, anything by Hieronymus Bosch., or another famous work. (You may not do the Mona Lisa or anything abstract.)

    #4 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

62 POINTS

As anyone who reads “Cosmopolitan” magazine knows, bohemian eco-chic weddings are all the rage. Let’s see a wedding dress made from recycled office paper.

    #5 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

42 POINTS

Nobody likes elevator music in an elevator - unless it’s flute or pan flute music played by a wood nymph. (We must see unsuspecting passengers in the elevator with the wood nymph.)

  #6 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

19 POINTS

Re-enact the experience of your birth, using (only) shadow puppets.

  #7 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

44 POINTS

(Up to 2 minutes.) You love your grandparents, or your great-grandparents, but you’ve never heard their stories. Get one of them to tell you about the two most transformative experiences of their early life, before they turned 30. These must be experiences that shaped them into the people they are today. They may be difficult situations or lucky ones, but they must be transformative. Subject(s) must be more than 80 years old.

  #8 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

82 POINTS

The year is 2021. Of all the unique and amazing human specimens on Earth, it was hard for the aliens to choose which ones to collect, but your team stood out as being excessively weird & worth “analysis”. Your entire team was abducted and put into an alien specimen box. In grid form, show each member of your team along with a card explaining where they got you (city, country) and a word stating what special characteristic makes you unique.

  #9 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

29 POINTS

I can assure you, THAT has never been frozen in jello before! How did you manage to do that?!

  #10 

51 POINTS

Pizza was invented in Italy in 997 AD to honor the Queen Consort, Queen Margherita. The next significant event in Italian history was the start of the Renaissance Period in the 14th century, which spawned a revival in art, architecture, science and learning. Let’s celebrate these two seminal moments in Italian history. Bake a Pizza decorated as a Renaissance painting that would make the Old Masters proud.

  #11 

82 POINTS

There are many old ghost towns (Note that Little Beaver Town on the list has been leveled. We’re not sure what happened to the ghosts but they may be smaller/flatter) around the world. I’ve been told, however, that almost all of these are fake and do not contain real ghosts. I refuse to believe this. Help me prove them wrong. Let’s see ghosts (at least 6) doing typical small-town activities (shopping, dropping stuff off in the mailbox, porch sitting, walking ghost dogs, as crossing guards and school kids, etc.) in one of the actual ghost towns at the link above (or in another legitimately publicized ghost town). Provide a caption to your image or video with the name of the ghost town , and the State or Province and Country you’re in.

  #12 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

29 POINTS

Many of us have lost pets in our lifetime. As a memorial to a loved pet that is now frolicking in the clouds chasing or sniffing whatever it was that pet liked to chase/sniff, write a poem or haiku about that loved one, or create a small shrine in nature comprised of items the pet loved and a photo of him or her.

  #13 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

41 POINTS

(Side by side) A child drawing of their idea of happiness. Then, make it happen.

  #14  - Click Here 

48 POINTS

Over the years gishwhes has always been a supporter of first responders (firemen, paramedics, ER medics, nurses, police, etc.). Let’s give them one last treatment of a proper gishwhes “THANK YOU!” Find your nearest and dearest first responders and bring them The Most Epic Cookies or Pastries the World Has Ever Seen (MECOPWHES).

  #15 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

23 POINTS

Groucho Marx a piece of fruit. No, we don’t know what this means either, but we’re excited to see what you come up with.

  #16 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

29 POINTS

(Up to 2 minutes.) Take your parent back to the place where they lived when they were 10. Find someone they knew from then and ask them to recall a shared memory.

  #17 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

69 POINTS

Spicy Art! Using the spices you have in your spice cupboard, make a picture of your favorite (1) comic book cover, or (2) cartoon character. Either submit it alone, or as a side-by-side image comparison.

  #18 

63 POINTS

Create or provide “gishwhes” welcome blankets (if it’s cold) or cold water and snacks (if it’s hot) for newly arriving immigrants… anywhere on the planet. Here’s some inspiration for you.

  #19 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

38 POINTS

(Side-by-side image) A photo of your pet and a photo of the portrait of your pet that you have made from their own food and treats.

  #20 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

41 POINTS

This family’s toys get into sweet, crazy escapades at night while the kids are sleeping. Your family’s toys make that family’s toys look like do-gooders. Let’s see what happened with your family’s toys while you slept last night.

  #21 

41 POINTS

Let’s see the world famous once-every-3000-years “Spectral Olympics”.

  #22 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

50 POINTS

We finally have a confirmed sighting of a mythical beast from urban legends (Bigfoot, Nessie, Yeti, etc.) suffering the effects of climate change.

  #23 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

39 POINTS

This morning, my daughter, Maison reported having seen a “moon fairy” while I was sleeping last night. As you know, the rarely-seen moon fairies are mischievous, nocturnal creatures who participate in synchronized, representational flight. Using a long exposure and flashlights (or other movable light sources) photograph these elusive beasts.

  #24 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

43 POINTS

She wore a raspberry beret… Wear a beret made out of raspberries as you shop in a second-hand store.

  #25 

56 POINTS

Wombat poop is shaped like little bricks. Sounds like the perfect building material for a tiny house! Show us! If we can figure out the architectural style you chose from your structure - bonus POINTS! You’ll probably have to go to a local zoo to ask for collections of this building material. Enjoy your visit while you’re there. Your image must contain a caption that shares a little known fact about wombats.

  #26 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

101 POINTS

(Create an old-school STOP MOTION film - up to 1 minute.) A Romeo and Juliet story... Two young virile socks (unmatched) meeting, falling in love, being kept apart and finally ending tragically.

  #27 

48 POINTS

The Internet has brought us all closer together, so this should be really easy: find someone from one of the 10 smallest countries in the world. Have them send you a forced perspective photo of something very small that makes that object look huge in front of a famous public landmark or historical site in that country. Caption the photo with “Big things happen in the tiny nation of [insert country name].” Teams may not share submissions with other teams, so make sure your tiny country helper isn’t helping someone else.

  #28 

58 POINTS

Finger-painting is often thought of as unsophisticated and associated with preschool. But we know it can be deployed for much loftier purposes. Prove the art historians and elitists wrong by finger painting a sophisticated mural with complex messaging about an important global issue on the wall of a classroom. You may want to get a pre-schooler or two to help just to make sure you’re doing it right!

  #29 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

37 POINTS

It is either winter or summer where you are. (If it is not, please contact our support so we can send NASA to find you.) There’s something you love to do outdoors in the winter or summer where you live. Do the activity you love to do in the opposite season that you are in.

  #30 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

41 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! NEW LEASH ON LIFE USA adopts otherwise unadoptable dogs and sends them through a unique training program. Shelter pets rarely get any attention and millions are put down each year. Many times this can be avoided if people on the Interwebs (who would like and could responsibly own a pet) were to see how cute, available, lonely and cuddly they are. Let’s save a pet or two (or thousands). Grab a friend or two and visit a shelter. Spend some time with one or more of the pets there. Post a selfie of your favorite pet looking for a “forever home” on Twitter (tagging @NewLeashUSA) or Instagram (tagging @NewLeashOnLifeUSA), using hashtag #adoptmeplease, and the social media handle or name of the shelter (so people can contact them). Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post link in the comment field of the submit page.

  #31 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

44 POINTS

You’ll find all you need to complete this item here: https://yung.cloud/index.php?a=track&id=29451

  #32 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

50 POINTS

Visit a local bakery or food market. Get them to donate still-edible items to a women’s shelter. Speak to the women’s shelter first to make sure they will accept donations like this. Submit an image of you at the women’s shelter donating the food items. Note:Please don’t take images that include any of the residents in the background out of respect to their safety & privacy.

  #33 

73 POINTS

From @gishwhes twitter feed: Everyone knows the most ticklish parts of planes are on the undersides of the wings (or “wing pits”, to use proper aircraft terminology). Let’s see the wing pits on a full-sized airplane. You can go true bohemian, decorative, or high and tight groomer - but it must really look like (or be) hair to count.

  #34 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

89 POINTS

As this is likely the last year of gishwhes we should probably do something to memorialize it. A lot of folks have been saying, “Save gishwhes!” But we say, “Shave “gishwhes”... into the back of your head.” Try to match the amazing logo that Olivia Desianti formed way back when - which we still use today. Bonus POINTS if you include the current or a former gishwhes hybrid mascot in your masterpiece. The same design shaved into a thick matt of back or chest hair would be an acceptable substitute.

  #35 - Click Here  

44 POINTS

Hand a bouquet of flowers (or a single flower) to a person leaving a house of worship that is not your religion. For example, if you are a Christian, you could hand a bouquet of flowers to someone leaving a mosque. If you’re Jewish, hand flowers to someone at a Christian church, etc. With the flowers, attach a note saying something in your own words, but to the effect of: “I may not worship in the same building as you, and I may not pray to the same prophets, but I am grateful to be sharing this planet with you in peace.”

  #36 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

23 POINTS

The dewey decimal system has long been responsible for keeping good books apart— books that clearly deserve to spend a life together on library shelves. For that matter, it seems so many libraries go out of their way to keep perfectly good literary companions apart as they separate fact from fiction, biography from archaeology, science fiction from politics. Be the matchmaker literature needs and get creative at your local library or bookstore. Show the spines of at least six books together in a library or bookstore (the more titles the better) the titles of which create the perfect oxymoronic sentence or phrase. - Monica Duff

  #37 

92 POINTS

No one talks about the fact that the destruction of the Death Star put thousands of Stormtroopers out of work. Luckily the Empire has a pretty robust social safety net and most of them have been retrained and placed in new jobs, the majority of which have been in the transportation sector. Let’s see a stormtrooper driving/flying a large passenger vehicle. Must be for mass transit, not just a car or a van. A subway, train, bus, ferry, plane, etc.

  #38 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

43 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Pick a celebrity social media image post (or an advertisement) and recreate it with a subtle twist like like Celeste Barber does here. Tweet, Instagram or FB post your image side-by-side with the original image, “#embracereality @gishwhes” and your team name. (You may also tag or mention the celebrity or brand you are satirizing.) Submit the image you take side-by-side with the original one, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

  #39 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

29 POINTS

You’ve heard of Cabbage Patch Kids, Garbage Pail Kids, and the Pacific Garbage patch. Let’s see a Great Pacific Garbage Patch Kid, (a cabbage-patch kid made from garbage you pick up from your local beach or lakefront), complete with adoption certificate.

  #40 

51 POINTS

(Up to 30 seconds.) THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT!. Have a full church choir sing Carry on My Wayward Son while wearing dental cheek retractors. Please make sure that the video shows some of the singers’ faces up close. Then, share the video via twitter with the band Kansas (@kansasband) with @mishacollins @gishwhes.” Submit the video on our site but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. - Nicki Bentley-Colthart

  #41 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

21 POINTS

Show us your own personal “Stairway to Heaven” -Dylan Cacador

  #42 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<�� 

48 POINTS

You ever heard of “pond dipping”? “river bugging”? Neither have we - but let’s not let that stop us. Invent and show off your own *SAFE* summer wet, wild and messy activity and caption it with a clever name.

  #43 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

39 POINTS

Never judge a book by its cover… or bread by its shape. Bake bread or cookies into the shape of something you would DEFINITELY not want to eat. (We hate to have to say this every year, but pornographic pastries will result in docked POINTS.)

  #44 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

56 POINTS

(Time-lapse up to 20 seconds.) A snail (or similarly VERY slow insect or worm) crossing a path or going up a wall. Put or stick objects in its path so it has to change directions multiple times. Then have it go through some “winner” gates at the end of its arduous trek. To make it a gripping adventure, you’ve dropped frames and turned this into a fast-paced adventure and set it to 1980s video game music, complete with a grand finale sound at the end when it makes it through the gates.

  #45 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

72 POINTS

You may not be aware, but leather-clad, tattoo-covered biker clubs love to hang out and play in those inflatable bouncy castles. Catch them in the act!

  #46 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

29 POINTS

THE FINAL “KALE” ART. (Please note that per Commandment #4 of the 2017 Hunt, this word and material as a Hunt item is not permitted. We are aware of this. That being said, we do not care. You still may not use the word “kale”. Henceforth, it shall be called [REDACTED] BUT you may use it as a material for this item.) Therefore, take a SINGLE glorious piece of [REDACTED] and, using whatever adornments or other decoratives, clipping patterns, etc., create a stunning, museum worthy piece of art that shall then be showcased (and submitted as such) as an ornamental headpiece on you.

  #47 

63 POINTS

Your strict neighborhood HOA (Homeowners’ Association) got replaced by a better HOA: the Hopeful Optimist’s Association. They’ve decided that your lawn isn’t quite up to regulations. Get your front yard up to snuff by building a large-scale, jaw-dropping sculpture or structure dedicated to Hope. Make it so magnificent that motorists backup & park to gaze at its beauty. (Conversely, it could be that YOUR neighborhood HOA got replaced by the Horrible Organization for Awfulness... You get where we’re going with this, right?)

  #48 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

48 POINTS

As most people know, roosters enjoy a good sunrise. But other farm animals enjoy sunrises and sunsets, too. Let’s see a photo of you, some friends or companions (such as your dog), and a sheep, horse, cow, or other non-rooster barnyard animal, watching the sun rise or set together. Bonus POINTS if the spectacular skies are reflected in water in front of you.

  #49 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

37 POINTS

There’s something important that your local or national politicians are not attending to properly. Stand in front of something that represents the issue/right/minority group/etc. that you care about and that your politicians are not adequately protecting and hold a large, hand-written sign with a message to the powers that be. Tweet this image to an elected official with the power to do something to help tagged “#gishwhesrights”. Submit the image and a link to your tweet in the comments.

  #50 

51 POINTS

Have too much of a good thing, by which we mean a cream-filled balloon the size of a volley ball. Volley, volley, spike! Play a game of volleyball with it in the middle of a busy plaza.

  #51 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

47 POINTS

Anyone who serves in the military is risking their life to serve their nation. Being respectful to not trespass on military grounds, stand in front of a large military craft, ship, tank, or plane with an inclusive sign of thanks to every service member of every kind. You may post this image on social media prior to the end of the hunt, if you choose. Submit the image with a link to your post in the comment section (if you chose to post it).

  #52 

41 POINTS

(Time-lapse up to 30 seconds.) Paint a dignified portrait of a President, Prime Minister, King, or Queen. But we don’t want you to waste canvas or paper! Paint this on a loved one’s bare back or abdomen. (use skin safe paints or edible “paint-like” food products!)

  #53 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

33 POINTS

Write something in frosting on a cake that you’ve always wanted to say to someone, and deliver it to them.

  #54 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

40 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Listen to this and be scared: http://www.radiolab.org/story/nukes/. But this bill has been introduced to try to solve this global risk. Let’s get it approved! Tweet ALL of your reps to pass the legislation to make congressional approval for first nuclear strike US law. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide a link to the tweet in the comment field of the submit page.

  #55 

34 POINTS

Make a homemade Castiel kite with a child. We must see the kite in flight.

  #56 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

41 POINTS

Sometimes things are just too comfy to leave, but you’re prepared for this! Let’s see you in your “Hammock Self-Containment Unit”. This, of course, would be you in a hammock with everything you need to live for one week, including all life preserving items, sanitation supplies and, of course, entertainment (live or otherwise). Make sure it’s clean, well organized, and designed for easy access to everything.

  #57 

52 POINTS

Show us a beautiful mermaid or sea creature performing a politically defiant modern dance solo to the beautiful music of the Sea Organ at Zadar. (Can’t make it to Zadar? The wave organ in San Francisco or the high tide organ in Blackpool may be substituted.)

  #58 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

89 POINTS

It’s time to recreate the epic historic Great Zombie vs. Vampire World War II. As you recall, this particular battle took place with Nerf guns (homemade or otherwise) in an arena, forest or field, and was wild, gruesome, and featured multiple soldiers.

  #59 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

59 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! This item takes place on Friday, Aug 11th, in whatever city you’re in at 10am in your time zone. Stand in front of your state or province’s legislative building (the building where your laws are enacted) and with your friends, hold up a large sign showing an excerpt or summary of a law that protects civil rights. For example if you live in the US, you could hold up a sign with a portion of the 1st amendment of the US Constitution written on it. Use the hashtag #gishwhes4rights. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

  #60 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

51 POINTS

(Up to 30 seconds - you may speed up or slow down the video if you need to.) Using only air-moving devices or machines, successfully navigate a balloon through a strange series of obstacles. It must be suspended in the air, without anyone or anything other than moving air touching it. It must travel at least 10 yards and culminate with your friend popping it with a needle sticking out from a hat they’re wearing.

  #61 

76 POINTS

(As long as it takes to complete the song.) THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! James Corden hosts Carpool Karaoke in the US— a viral show that has celebrities singing songs with him in a car. (Yes, we realize this is typical lowbrow-American TV, but it works.) We want to upgrade carpool karaoke and make it more high-brow. Create your own carpool karaoke with a political or intellectual powerhouse. Your co-singer must be either a nobel laureate, MacArthur Fellow, a national elected official, Bill Nye, Jane Goodall, Neil deGrasse Tyson, or any past or present member of the Harlem Globetrotters. Oh, and your karaoke song must have sufficient gravitas and must be an 80s pop song. For example, “Like a Virgin” would do nicely. Shoot your video Carpool Karaoke style. Tweet the video to @JKCorden with

#gishwhesloveskaraoke and mention who your passenger is in the post. Upload the video on our submit page but be sure to provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

  #62 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

42 POINTS

Honeybees are a “keystone” species just like sharks. If they’re gone, we’re in big trouble. Unfortunately, there are currently “Colony Collapse Disorders” happening with honeybees throughout the world. This is when the majority of worker bees in a colony disappear, leaving the queen and immature bees to fend for themselves (most colonies completely die). This has major global food crop implications, as honeybees perform the magic of pollination of agricultural crops. If bees go by the wayside, we will have to find alternative pollination solutions, and that ain’t gonna be easy. But, let’s roll up our sleeves and give it a shot: Plant something in your garden (or plant a garden if you don’t have one) that is bee friendly (even if it’s just one plant in one pot on a patio). Spring - lilacs, penstemon, lavender, sage, verbena, and wisteria. Summer – Mint, cosmos, squash, tomatoes, pumpkins, sunflowers, oregano, rosemary, poppies, black-eyed Susan, passion flower vine, honeysuckle. Fall – Fuschia, mint, bush sunflower, sage, verbena, toadflax. Take a picture of yourself wearing some sort of bee-attire doing your part to pollinate your newly planted plant.

  #63 

265 POINTS

(Time-lapse up to 1 minute but preferably under 30 seconds.) Loo goes to space! A person named Loo won our NASA email contest last Fall, and Loo’s prize is out of this world. Write “Loo” on a paper airplane and launch it from the stratosphere (or higher). We must CLEARLY see you writing the name on the paper airplane and folding it, the paper airplane’s journey into space, and then the actual launch where the plane is released from the stratosphere from whatever vehicle has conveyed it to those heights (high-altitude weather balloons are an acceptable means of conveyance). Oh, and one more thing: the paper airplane must be decorated and must have a message on it about a secret, global conspiracy to make the world a better place. It should also have your team name written on it and the following email address: with the instructions: “If found please email picture of airplane and location found to: airgishwhes@gmail.com.

  #64 

58 POINTS

Quilt a gishwhes onesie out of underwear and/or gloves. Strike a pose in the lobby of a financial institution or bank. Bonus POINTS if it’s the floor of a stock exchange.

  #65 

65 POINTS

You know SuperWhoLock? The amalgamation of Supernatural, Doctor Who and Sherlock? Well, that’s been done to death and everyone has moved on to the next big mashup. Let’s see 3D street art on a pavement or wall (in chalk!) that’s of a scene or setting from SuperWhoWatch (an amalgamation of Supernatural, Doctor Who and BayWatch)

  #66 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

18 POINTS

Personify your favorite movie title. Include a caption on your image of the title of the movie in quotes. - Tanya Best

  #67 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

43 POINTS

Banana Hammock. This year’s summer fashion elitists are all wearing the latest rage: Banana Bikini or Banana Briefs. Join them!

  #68 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

51 POINTS

You finally have a use for all the naked bananas you now have sitting around! Bake as much banana bread as you can with “gishwhes” spelled out in bananas on the top & distribute it to your local nursing home.

  #69 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

28 POINTS

You’ve been putting this off for far too long. Tell your parents something bad that you did as a child that they still don’t know about. Capture their reaction. This must not be staged. We have an Academy Award Winning Judge on staff that will determine if your parent has already heard this story and you will be docked POINTS. - CJ and Lauren

  #70 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

39 POINTS

(Time-lapse down to 20 seconds.) Sidewalk cafes are all the rage, but most “sidewalk cafes” are total posers. Set up a “sidewalk cafe” the way it was meant to be - on an actual sidewalk. Cook a delicious omelet using just a magnifying glass, a hot sidewalk, and the sun. Share your feast with a friend!

  #71 

0 POINTS

DELETED FOR REASONS - THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Rapper B. o. B. seems to think that the world is flat. Perform a highly scientific experiment that proves that it is not and tweet the results to him (https://twitter.com/bobatl (https://twitter.com/bobatl)). Submit the image or video you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

  #72 

111 POINTS

I hate to say it, but this financial company is underwater. Let’s see the board meeting— with professionally dressed people at the table with chairs, paper, pens etc… all fully submerged at the bottom of a swimming pool.

  #73 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

39 POINTS

Visit a local laundromat. Place decorated envelopes with enough money (in coins or bills, depending on the machines) for one load of washing and one load of drying on at least one machine with the note: “We swim together, we tumble together. Love, Gishwhes.”

  #74 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

43 POINTS

Modify a grocery store shopping cart to be space-worthy. Put an alien being in the pilot’s seat and help them navigate the terrain of the “Earth produce” department to collect specimens.

  #75 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

16 POINTS

They told me I couldn’t, so I did. Pose in front of a sign declaring a rule. Break that rule. A few notes: It must be safe (what you are doing), and it MUST NOT be a law or illegal where you are. It must only be a “rule”. For example, you might find a sign that says, “collared shirts only.” You would pose in front of that sign wearing a tank top. - Inspired by Emily Shulman

  #76 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

39 POINTS

Have a caveperson demonstrate glass-blowing. - Jennifer Pierce

  #77 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

24 POINTS

Personify or embody your team name. Caption your image with your team name. - Shannon

  #78 

48 POINTS

Being in the hospital can be scary and lonely for kids! Visit your local hospital to play a two-player video game with a pediatric patient. Be sure to dress thematically to match your game(s)! Take a picture of yourself in front of the children’s hospital. Do not take pictures with the kids unless they approve, their guardian(s) approve, and the hospital approves; we don’t want them to feel exploited. However, you MUST play with a child to get POINTS for this item. This will be an honor system. You will have very bad karma if you cheat on this one. - Kristin Lindsay - Child’s Play charity.

  #79 

29 POINTS

(Up to 20 seconds.) Why would you move from the couch during a Supernatural binge watching session? Build a complex SPN-themed Rube-Goldberg machine to fill your empty glass, catapult you a snack, or to serve some other couch potato need. - Diane-Audrey Carlier

  #80 

73 POINTS

You’ve all seen “dog shaming memes” on the Internets. You know that crowd that lines up at the plaza of The Today Show and shows up on air? Let’s take it over with gisher-self-shaming signs. Hold up a large, colorful sign that details something you did that you probably shouldn’t have done (for example, “I drank milk straight of the carton and put it back in the fridge without telling my roommates”). Make it a light-hearted trivial violation, not a deep-seated personality flaw, actual violation of the law, or other serious offense. Share with us a clip of the AIRED FOOTAGE that shows your team’s sign and in the comments section of the item submitter, let us know which sign was yours. Do not add your team name or “gishwhes” anywhere on the sign… we want this to be a mystery.

  #81 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

25 POINTS

Sometimes it feels like your boss expects you to be in more than one place at more than one time, but you’re a gisher so you know how to deliver. Using the panoramic photo function on your phone, insert yourself at least three times in the same picture in different positions and/or wardrobe to show yourself as you “multitask”. You may NOT Photoshop yourself into the image. (Hint: you have to run around the person taking the picture each time they pass you in the frame.)

  #82 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

19 POINTS

In honour of Canada’s 150th birthday, even though you may not be Canadian, you and a friend should clearly cover yourself in maple syrup and go roll in some maple leaves. - Jessica G.

  #83 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

29 POINTS

Lets see your interpretation of fireworks using vegetables and spaghetti as mixed media. - Saty381

  #84 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<   

52 POINTS

(Two Images side-by-side.) The first image is a photo of an illustrated page from a children’s book. The second image is your reenactment of that illustration in 3 dimensions. - Inspired by Sarah Trumbley

  #85 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

47 POINTS

Let’s see LABSWHES. The Largest Awesome Balloon Sculpture the World Has Ever Seen. The themes this year are “insect” or “space”—or both. You must be in the middle of this structure.

  #86 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

39 POINTS

Everyone thinks unicorns are beautiful, magical, gentle creatures. You know better. Prove it to the world! You may use any media you like, including Photoshop. - Traci Akierman

  #87 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

41 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Tweet a picture of you or your child dressed as a bear in school to @betsydevos with whatever text you like and “#KeepSchoolsSafeFromBears #Gishwhes”. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. - Diedra Lookingbill

  #88 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

60 POINTS

Three words: 10 Mannequin-pin Bowling. - Ariana Preis

  #89 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

43 POINTS

Apply lipstick while jumping on a trampoline. - Emily Schulman

  #90 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

42 POINTS

“Why did the chicken cross the road?” There’s no better crossing guard than a mother hen! Dressed as a chicken, offer to help people cross a busy street.

  #91 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

31 POINTS

Leave a Yelp review of gishwhes after you deliver food to the homeless or to a homeless shelter.

  #92 

62 POINTS

(Up to 20 seconds.) It’s nice to see a serious sport finally get the recognition it deserves: http://www.euronews.com/2017/04/30/finns-compete-in-annual-hobby-horse-championship. Now, let’s see video documentation of “Human NASCAR” complete with the speeding, lane changes, a pit-stop, crashes, etc. You & at least 5 friends must be drivers of “vehicles” of your own design, complete with corporate sponsorship logos. All vehicles must be motor-free and foot-propelled (ala-Flintstones) and all engine sounds must be vocalized by you and your friends. Just to be clear... this is Human NASCAR, not roller derby. All vehicles must be propelled on foot.

  #93 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<   

72 POINTS

Get an elected official’s signature on a statement (written on official letterhead paper) declaring gishwhes an act of lawful resistance or civil disobedience. (Inspired by U of C Scav, 1987)

  #94 

44 POINTS

Camouflage yourself in a pet store.

  #95 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

58 POINTS

(Up to 30 seconds.) The Silicon Gourmet has been teaching a neural network to generate recipes. Learning to cook is hard (as my son can attest)! In the interest of encouraging budding AI chefs everywhere, create a Food Network-worthy video preparing one of the recipes as described in the network’s cookbook. Make sure to sample the results on camera. Oh, and you must look and behave as if you were a droid, of course.

  #96 

38 POINTS

(Try to take a very close-up photo - a.k.a. “Macro” photo.) Nice grill! Combine the “tiny food” trend with urban fashion. Show someone cooking tiny hamburgers & hot dogs on a friend’s “grill” (the dental kind.)

  #97 

61 POINTS

Do something fitting in front of the Gereja Ayam (the abandoned Chicken Church of Indonesia). For example, you could play a game of Duck, Duck, Chicken! Or you could ponder the question: Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Or you could host an easter egg hunt… You get the picture.

  #98 

38 POINTS

A marionette show featuring a puppet of Trump being controlled by a Putin lookalike. Quintuple BONUS POINTS if Putin himself is the puppeteer.

  #99 

47 POINTS

Letterboxing (http://www.letterboxing.org/ or see https://www.atlasquest.com/) is a game where people hide small weatherproof boxes in publicly accessible spaces with a logbook & a stamp. They share the clues to find their box on the web or via word of mouth. Create a letterbox for your team & share clues so other teams can find it over social media. Leave a logbook with your team stamp on it in the box. Then, find another teams’ box and leave them a message of encouragement along with your team’s stamp in their log book. Submit proof that you found at least one other team’s book & the message you wrote. NO COLLUSION! (And that goes for you, too, Donald.) NOTE: Please either pickup your boxes after the Hunt ends or dedicate yourselves to maintaining them post-hunt.

  #100 

38 POINTS

Calliope. Clio. Euterpe. Erato. Melpomene. Polyhymnia. Terpischore. Thalia. Urania. Inspirational goddesses of literature, the arts and science in Greek mythology. On the steps of the National Gallery in Trafalgar Square, provide a visual representation of the muse that guides you in your art and/or life.

  #101 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

80 POINTS

As I’m sure you’ve seen, over the years we have marketed gishwhes relentlessly and shamelessly (because we really want everyone to do it). This is the last gishwhes, so now it’s your turn to go ahead and show us how we should’ve marketed it. Create a gishwhes ad that no one would be able to resist. Note: you may make false or misleading claims if you so choose, but because we’re curious, you could even take a stab at a legit one. …

  #102 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

74 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! During the First Annual and Last Ever 2017 gishwhes Tea Party, we identified gishers based on their right-brush or left-brush toothbrushing statuses. Conduct a massive poll on your social networks for the gishwhes Institute of Vital Statistics to prove conclusively whether people brush their teeth starting on the same side of their mouth as their dominant hand or the opposite side. Because this is solid science, your sample size must have a minimum of 400 respondents. Submit a visually-compelling graph of your poll data and the number of votes and the winner. Use the hashtag

#gishwhesteeth. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

  #103 

26 POINTS

Play hopscotch at one of the marker sites of Víddaflakk. (BONUS: Play Interdimensional Hopscotch.)

  #104 

90 POINTS

A far-right Republican senator and a far-left Democrat Senator (or two similarly “diametrically party-opposed” legislative makers in your country) co-wearing a very large (fits two people) “This is Our ‘Get-Along’ Shirt.” Caption the image with the names of the politicians.

  #105 

81 POINTS

We know a little girl that makes a different kind of Advent Calendar. As she marks off each day on the calendar, she gives something away. Make your own version of a reverse Advent calendar. On the first day of gishwhes, create a decorated Advent calendar whereby, for each day on the calendar, you depict something you’re going to give away. Then, each day of the Hunt, take a picture of you fulfilling your calendar item. Submit 7 pictures in a grid (or a video slideshow) showing what you’ve done. Then, continue on through the calendar period. (Yes, this will continue after the Hunt is over, but though gishwhes as we know it may be ending, its spirit will live on in you!) -Keegan Connor Tracy’s 10-year old daughter

  #106 

79 POINTS

The Lumbasumba region is being protected this year by Gishwhes. We gishers managed to purchase for permanent preservation more than 60 square miles of the Lumbasumba forest during the final weeks of registration in July! But the Lumbasumba area is more than just a forest. It’s also the hottest new dance craze. Show us how it’s done. (As all gishers know, you need to do it next to a REAL monkey, a parrot, or a camel to do it right.)

  #107 

92 POINTS

(Up to 45 seconds.) AMOK ITEM! Let’s virtually graffiti the world with kindness! Using a GPS tracking app (like Figure Running or similar), walk, jog, or run as large a path as you can to spell out a message of love, hope, or kindness. As you go, stop and perform acts of kindness and document them. You must show us the map with coordinates at the end of your path as well as the minimum of 3 documented act of kindness. - Inspired by Tia Pogue

  #108 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

28 POINTS

The chickens have come home to Proust.

  #109 

71 POINTS

(Up to 22 seconds.) Wonder Woman being “Superman-splained” to.

  #110 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

29 POINTS

The return of the Three-ingredient Challenge! Show us: Triptych, Transylvanian, takin.

  #111 

45 POINTS

A street vendor handing out toilet paper roses at the toilet fountain in Foshan, China.

  #112 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

83 POINTS

A ballet troupe in tutus, engaged in a bar brawl - freeze framed at its most climactic moment.

  #113 

62 POINTS

Set up a Maximum Security Birdhouse in a beautiful public park.

  #114  

0 POINTS

DELETED FOR REASONS - Let’s see a TripAdvisor or Airbnb review of your mother’s womb as an “extended stay hotel”. Keep it suitable for work and any child’s prying eyes!

  #115 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

83 POINTS

Make A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of Le Grande Jatte by Seraut into an elaborate dot-to-dot image.

  #116 

65 POINTS

Not many people know this, but the Kessel Run was actually a foot race. Let’s see at least 5 Star Wars characters competing in the Kessel Run in a shopping mall.

  #117 

65 POINTS

Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole. Let’s see Dean Winchester driving a pedi-cab or quadricycle with Castiel & Sam as passengers.

  #118 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

60 POINTS

Rumor has it that Amazon is teaming up with the Vatican for a bold new service: On Demand Drone Deliverance services. Show us a drone administering a wedding service, confession, last rites, communion or baptism.

  #119 

22 POINTS

Trump l’oeil. (This is not a typo.)

  #120 

91 POINTS

You’ve heard of a soap box derby, but the sofa bed derby is where it’s at. Let’s see two “race car” sofa beds, each with pajama-clad “drivers”, racing down an actual street. Be safe and complete this where there is absolutely no traffic!

  #121 

32 POINTS

The people of Iceland believe in Huldufólk, which are invisible elves. They build tiny houses and churches for them. But the Huldufólk deserve to have a nightlife, too! Let’s see a tiny Huldufólk nightclub in a busy urban area.

  #122 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

40 POINTS

They say a rolling stone gathers no moss, but can moss gather a Rolling Stone? Make a portrait of one of The Rolling Stones out of moss.

  #123 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

38 POINTS

As all gishers know, Saturday, August 12 is “Meet Another Gisher Day.” Meet up in front of the largest art museum in your town at 10:00 AM (of whatever timezone you’re in). It’s a pot-luck coleslaw brunch this year, so bring your favorite family recipe of coleslaw… and as much sidewalk chalk as you can. After brunch, decorate the pavement with a collaborative message to the world. In order for a meet-up to count you need to have representatives of at least 5 teams present, so this will require some organizing. Gishwhes is all about coming together, so teams may collaborate (gasp!) on this one, but your team’s image or video must still be all your own.

  #124 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

21 POINTS

Be someone’s “rock” to get them through the hard times. Hand-paint small rocks with a message of kindness & leave them in areas that need a pick-me-up. (On the underside, please write “Pass it on.”) You must paint & hide at least one rock for each member of your team.

  #125 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

41 POINTS

(Time-lapse under 20 seconds.) All good things must come to an end, and so it is with the Hunt. Create a “sand” mandala featuring images that symbolize the hunt to you… all using pixie sticks as your chakpur and sand. When it’s done, show us your masterwork and then, just like the Buddhist monks, sweep it away and get ready for what’s next.

  #126 

0 POINTS

DELETED - Reward! I won’t say that Jensen & Jared are missing their balls, but they were last seen being sent into this quarry (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRObA6f_zec&feature=youtu.be) at Britannia Beach. Find them, take a photo, and put them back exactly where you found them for other teams to find. If you keep them, you will lose valuable karma & points.

  #127 

64 POINTS

These Kung-Fu Nuns (dare we say “Nunjas?”) are biking through the Himalayas to stop human trafficking. (No, really.) In their honor, let’s see some tricks on a BMX bike. Rider must be dressed in a nun’s habit.

  #128 

84 POINTS

Get a Porcupanda or other gishwhes mascot included as an emoji on an official iPhone emoji list.

  #129 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

57 POINTS

IMAGE or VIDEO. Pope St. Francis set up a laundromat to help the homeless get access to clean clothes. Follow his lead by setting up a service station to benefit the homeless or impoverished in your area (a “take what you need” public pantry, toiletries cabinet, water station, public shower, public toilet, laundry facility, open library, etc.).

  #130 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

23 POINTS

A tactometer used to measure tact.

  #131 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

33 POINTS

Make a collage that features things only locals from your town would know about. Display it prominently in a public space in your town.

  #132 

79 POINTS

Couch Surfing 2: The Revenge. Last year, in our infinite wisdom, we suggested “couch surfing: real surfing, real couch.” We quickly came to our senses and pulled the item for safety reasons, but it’s been a year and we don’t hold onto the past. Couch surfing: Let’s see it in the real surf with a BUOYANT (e.g.,inflatable) couch. You may not use a real couch as it’s too dangerous and bad for the ecosystem. Make it happen. (You may not leave any couches in any body of water and you must be super safe with this. If waves are too big, do not do it.)

  #133 

42 POINTS

Waste not, want not. Save every piece of non-biodegradable refuse that you would have normally thrown away from Days 1-5 of the Hunt and on day 6, use this material to create a sculpture of an endangered animal.

  #134 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

21 POINTS

My wife is so trend-forward, she recently took a “goat yoga class” (it’s real; you can google it.) Without hurting, upsetting, or endangering ANY animal, show us the next trend in animal-infused yoga that she should get on board with.

  #135 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

40 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! (Up to 30 seconds.) Freeze frame on a picture of you (like they do at the end of movies) and then roll a credit sequence for your own life. Include a “here’s what happens to you in the future” sentence or two and then a listing of the people that have helped you get where you are now or where you are going and what their “titles” are. Post this on the social media channel of your choice with the hashtags #gishwhes #mylife. Submit the video, and in the comment field provide the link to the post.

  #136 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

29 POINTS

Often misunderstood and rarely properly pronounced, chupacabras just need a good home. Adopt one and show us your favorite bonding moment.

  #137 

51 POINTS

Take an elderly person (at least 70 years old) on a joyride in their favorite car (same make and model and vintage) from their youth. The elderly person must be at least 70 years old; the car, at least 60 years old... and you and the senior must be dressed in period attire that reflects the era when the car was manufactured.

  #138 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

52 POINTS

Prejudice is something we can easily see and call out in others. However, we all have biases and prejudices of our own that we are often blind to. You’re going to have to dig deep here - but you’re a gisher, so we know you can do it. Show us you taking a step to overcome one of your own prejudices.

  #139 

61 POINTS

Each member of your team must knit or crochet one piece of a quilted throw that, when combined, showcases your team emblem or symbol.

  #140 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

51 POINTS

Everyone talks about drum circles, but they grossly underestimate the power of other shapes. Create a complex shape with as many sides, angles or curves as you can, and demonstrate the power of percussion geometry - with as many drummers as you can drum up.

  #141 

42 POINTS

At least 8 people walking in twos, on the Tiger & Turtle in Duisburg, Germany as if it were an actual roller coaster. They must keep their hands up as they walk the track, except for one of the front “riders” who is clenching an invisible lap bar, terrified. It’s okay to be nauseous.

  #142 

80 POINTS

As all gishers know, a Gish Gallop can only be performed by a Forbes 1000 CEO in the lobby of that CEO’s company’s headquarters on a hobby horse or a live pony. Caption your video with the name of the company and CEO that we are watching as they Gish Gallop.

  #143 

41 POINTS

Sure, most Stormtroopers toed the line, but back in the 1960s there were a few draft-dodging peacenik Stormtroopers. Find a famous vintage photo of a peace sit-in or Woodstock-level love-in and flawlessly photoshop in one or more Stormtroopers. We must think it’s the real thing. As an alternative, you can stage your own “peace” picture and submit an “aged” stormtrooper sit-in image. YES, YOU MAY PHOTOSHOP THIS ITEM!

  #144 

37 POINTS

(Up to 30 seconds.) An impromptu concert consisting of a chocalho, an apito, a reco-reco, and a pandeiro. (Bonus POINTS if you perform in front of, or in, the Teatro Amazonas.) Oh, and of course the musicians are playing Carry On my Wayward Son by @kansasband.

  #145 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

71 POINTS

Oversized board games are a trend, with oversized Jenga and such. Let’s see a game of tiddlywinks being played— scaled up to giant-sized.

  #146 

40 POINTS

Two nice suburban monster moms out for a day of shopping at Hoxton’s Monster Supplies in England.

  #147 

28 POINTS

Paint an extraordinary portrait of your favorite gishwhes mascot with the brand “D2N” (with the 2 backwards) on the Werregarenstraat.

  #148 

38 POINTS

Dress up as a superhero and perform acts of “kindness” heroism at Hősök tere (Hero’s Square).

  #149 

71 POINTS

(Time-lapse up to 25 seconds.) Canada’s Prime Minister Justin Trudeau gets a lot of attention for being super hot. Frankly, it’s starting to detract from his ability to govern. Cool things down by making a sculpture of Trudeau out of Canada’s most ample resource: ice. A couple of caveats: the frozen water you use must have something added to it to make it opaque, and inside the ice must be something emblematic of canada that doesn’t melt (for example, a hockey skate). The timelapse must be of the sculpture melting revealing the object hidden inside. Make sure to frame your shot with a fitting or neutral background so that the final product really pops.

  #150 

33 POINTS

Ireland has the lowest reports of UFO sightings in Europe each year. Something must be done about this! Make and display a convincing UFO in a public place in Ireland to increase the number.

  #151 

54 POINTS

Visit Cat Island (Tashirojima, Japan) dressed as a dog. You must have at least 10 cats in the photo.

  #152 

42 POINTS

Decorate the exterior of your home like the Pan House, using whatever object speaks to you.

  #153 

72 POINTS

Not to be quixotic, but wind power and automation are the future of personal grooming. Create a wind-powered device to automate a self-care process. Could be a wind-powered shoe shining machine, a wind-powered, toothbrush, etc. (It must actually work and must actually be powered by wind.)

  #154 

33 POINTS

There’s a UFO Observation Deck (redmonkeygroup.com) in Slovakia. On Sunday, August 6 at 3 PM Slovakian time, grab your friends and dress up as your interpretation of extraterrestrials and go there. Bring luggage and queue up outside of it as though you’re boarding to go back home (you don’t have to enter).

  #155 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

40 POINTS

Over the years, we’ve had menstrual-hygiene supply sculptures of everything from dinosaurs to seagulls to puppies. We’ve also gotten a lot of flak for encouraging waste, and in protest gishers have donated thousands of menstrual pads to shelters, (which actually proves that in fact we at gishwhes can do no wrong). This final year’s list wouldn’t be complete without a menstrual-hygiene sculpture, so we’re ending this by splitting the difference: Create a tiny, perfectly sculpted statue of Michelangelo’s David or another famous historic sculpture of your choosing out of a SINGLE tampon, and then donate at least 1 box of menstrual hygiene supplies to your local shelter. Submit the image of your sculpture. The donation will be on the honor system. Remember, KARMA is a bitch.

  #156 

71 POINTS

Sure, Misha & HRH Queen Elizabeth II had a rocky year in 2016 with their “Brexit Breakup”, but despite a brief conscious uncoupling, theirs is a love that stands the test of time. Prove it by showing us Egyptian hieroglyphics, Greek urns, or other recently-unearthed archaeological finds that prove theirs is a love that has lasted through the ages. If you’re choosing to do a hieroglyphic, you may NOT permanently deface any stone - use chalk!

  #157 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

38 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! NASA is soliciting tweets to send to Voyager 1. Tweet your suggestion with #gishwhes. I suggest it be the following theme: Voyager 1 ran to the store and you are texting to remind it to pick something up at the store. But we will permit messages of any type so let your imaginations run wild. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide a link to the tweet in the comment field of the submit page.

  #158 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

22 POINTS

Thanks to “reactions” we can now communicate our feelings more clearly to one another! But Facebook limits us to just 6 reactions and we at gishwhes HQ believe that this limitation constraints our ability to express nuanced emotions to one another. Let’s see an updated version of the Facebook “reactions” with feelings like “silently judging you”, “reacting positively to your face but planning to gossip about this later”, and “I’m just not sure how to feel about this” and other more subtle emotions. You may photoshop this item.

  #159 

47 POINTS

Who said you couldn’t Hunt while in hospital? Certainly not any of us! Show off your large-scale cartoon skills by writing the longest poem (or drawing the largest mural) you can, all about the adventures of a virus caught in a hospital, on a scroll made from a roll of exam table paper.

  #160 

41 POINTS

As you all know, my grandmother lives at Roland Park Place in Baltimore, MD. It’s a senior assisted-living home. She’s been hesitant to have the shenanigans of gishwhes descend, so let’s legitimize that fear... from Tuesday to Thursday 10AM to 4PM ONLY PLEASE! (DON’T SHOW UP AT ANY OTHER TIME OR IT WILL BE AN INCONVENIENCE TO THE GUESTS AT THE HOME and you will be docked POINTS!) Let’s invade Roland Park Place literally! Show up dressed as an extraterrestrial on an interplanetary goodwill mission. Bring an offering of your home planet’s favorite treats or creature comforts (games, large print books, slippers, slip-proof socks, soft blankets, etc) and specimens of natural beauty from this planet (humans like that). You will get 25% bonus POINTS if you perform this item at Roland Park Place (that’s the added value of nepotism), but you can get full credit if you perform this item at any retirement home/assisted living facility.

  #161 

87 POINTS

David LaChapelle is a renowned experimental photographer known for his kitsch-pop surrealist style. Recreate a well-known painting as a photograph in the style of David LaChappelle. Somewhere in your image there must be a banana, and you may not depict The Last Supper. (2X Bonus: get Dave Chappelle to star in your David LaChapelle homage.)

  #162 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

33 POINTS

Lube luge. That’s it. That’s the item.

  #163 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

60 POINTS

This Hunt’s must-have fashion trend: an aquarium hat with live fish. The aquarium hat must not endanger the live fish in any way.

  #164 

0 POINTS

REMOVED FOR REASONS - Get a bonafide zillow listing for property on Mars.

  #165 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

28 POINTS

https://twitter.com/zenxv/status/845474882607632384

  #166 

38 POINTS

(Time-lapse up to 30 seconds.) Follow a tomato back in time from the local co-op to where the farmer grew it. Thank them for their service by sharing a sandwich with them… one that has slices of that tomato in it.

  #167 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

29 POINTS

(Time-lapse up to 20 seconds.) There are two things that science has proven unequivocally: 1) global warming is happening and 2) sucking the melting ice cream from a tiny hole in the bottom of a sugar cone is the greatest possible pleasure in life. (Minimum 5 rounded scoops on top and you must suck all the ice cream through the tiny hole.)

  #168 

66 POINTS

When the apocalypse comes and the power goes out you are going to be sorry you are so digitally-dependent! Have your social media page printed on microfiche… just in case.

  #169 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

27 POINTS

Write “Ass butt” (in non-toxic kids finger paint or chalk!) on the hindquarters of an Ass. (This should go without saying, but be careful & safe. Approach from the side, never stand directly behind it, and try to keep the donkey happy so you don’t get injured.)

  #170 

88 POINTS

Angels may be all-powerful, but they’re luddites (technologically behind the times) and it affects their productivity in the office. Let’s see an angel writing something on an old-school mechanical typewriter (not electric) featuring a working Enochian keyboard. (The keys and keystrokes must correspond to actual Enochian typeface.)

  #171 

41 POINTS

A stump grinder with a unicorn decal, being pushed by a child no more than 7 years old wearing a pink princess costume. (Edited because Misha is not much into stump-grinding and thought a stump grinder was something else.) It should go without saying, but this is a photo op. The stump grinder should not be on or operational. Safety first!

  #172 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<    

32 POINTS

Now that this may be the last gishwhes-as-we-know-it ever, it’s time to reflect on missed opportunities. Let’s see the Item List Misha SHOULD have made all these years. Give us your team’s ideal gishwhes Item List with a minimum of 10 Items. If the majority of the items you create look like no thought was put into them (and you were just quickly writing down items to get the POINTS), you will receive zero POINTS.

  #173 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

55 POINTS

Complete one of the more challenging items on your team’s homemade gishwhes Item List.

  #174 

0 POINTS

DELETED FOR REASONS - An Airbnb listing for the gishbus.

  #175 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<<

36 POINTS

Everyone knows “high noon” means “high tea”. Bring a little bit of civilization to the frontier with Wild West teacup and saucer holsters. 

  #176 

33 POINTS

For our gish cousins in the antipodes where the days are short and the nights are cold: Establish a “TLC” station at Federation Square, opposite Flinders Street Station in Melbourne or on the steps of the Opera House in Sydney, and provide a little warmth – be it a coffee, a heat pack, or simply a smile – for those making their journey to work on the cold winter mornings.

  #177 - Click Here  <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

44 POINTS

A Scottish terrier in a Scottish kilt eating a scotch egg in front of an Irish monument. 

  #178 

54 POINTS

The Prague Astronomical Clock – or Prague orloj – is the third oldest astronomical clock in the world, and the oldest one still operating. But imagine if this feat of mechanical engineering did more than mark the passage of time... Imagine it could actually take you back in time! Gather your teammates, friends, and family members together and show us the time period you would travel back to if this historic clock warped the time continuum. Note: You and your time-travelling companions must be pictured in front of the clock.

  #179 

36 POINTS

(Up to 45 seconds edited.) Share an audio dream diary of your first thoughts as you wake up every morning of the Hunt (so you cannot submit this until the last day of the Hunt!). It must be the first thing you do before you get out of bed.

  #180 

111 POINTS

(Up to 30 seconds.) Cinema has evolved, but some actors don’t. Let’s see a silent film actress against a 1920’s style black-and-white-set. The actor/actress must have exaggerated facial expressions and the score must be nickelodeon-style piano music. Suddenly, the music changes… It’s hip hop and modern technology comes in with color and sync sound, but she’s still black and white and still mouthing words with title card.

  #181 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

87 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Let’s see a (SFW) 2,000 word essay published on twitter in 140 character bursts. (no attachments, etc.) about the best way to get pregnant for the 10th time. (I’m sorry, but I promised someone this would be an item.) Submit an image of the first post and then a link to this post in the COMMENT field of the submit page so we can check to make sure you “published” the whole thing.

  #182 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

53 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Seamlessly modify using photoshop (or other digital altering software), a well-know oil painting by adding in an anachronistic element. For example, if it were a Monet, you might put one of the ladies under a parasol holding an ipad. YES, YOU MAY DIGITALLY ALTER THE IMAGE YOU ARE SUBMITTING… with a catch. The anachronistic element must be rendered seamlessly into the image in the style of the original painter or creator. It must look like a part of the original composition; we should not be able to tell it was added in later. Post the image on FB and/or Pinterest. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page.

#gishwhesModernMasterpiece

  #183 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

53 POINTS

You are all soon going to be a part of a sinister plot to take over the world… in a unique way. But we need your help. Here’s the first thing you have to do: Decide what your favorite point of interest, historical site or national landmark is in your town or city and enter its address here: http://qrickit.com/qrickit_apps/qrickit_qrcode_creator_geo.php . Below the map on that webpage you’ll see an “optional text” field. Enter “Taken by CFG”. Then click “Qcreate” at the bottom. Download the QR code and submit it as your item. Stay tuned for what comes next...

  #184 

92 POINTS

(Up to 30 seconds if video.) Last year, we helped people around the world get access to clean water. But it’s been a year and the problem certainly hasn’t gone away. In fact, as global temperatures rise, the problem is only going to intensify. Work with your team to create a realistic (not a joke or parody) schematic or prototype of an easy-to-set up portable personal AWG (atmospheric water generator) system that could be used anywhere in the world. It must be cheap to build (aim for less than $10) with parts that can be found in any hardware store. It must be compact & light enough for a nomadic or homeless individual to carry around. Ideally, it would collect enough water in a day to sustain someone for that day.

  #185 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

48 POINTS

Hug a national forest! Grab as many friends as you can and go to your favorite national forest or park and be tree huggers. Set the camera up so we can see all the tree hugging action clearly.

  #186 

46 POINTS

One of the biggest problems astronauts will face when they travel to Mars will be figuring out how to bring enough food for the three year journey. Porcupanda has offered the idea of making their spacecraft out of food. Show them how. Build an edible spacecraft using anything except “space ice cream” (Per our resident Director of Intergalactic Space Exploration, that stuff tastes like strawberry Styrofoam: “Bleecht!” as he so eloquently put it.)

  #187 

51 POINTS

Every year, the scientists at the NASA Jet Propulsion Lab make spectacular pumpkin carvings that put our humble Halloween jack-o-lanterns to shame (see https://www.wired.com/2016/10/watch-nasas-high-tech-pumpkins-action/). Whatever. What’s a rocket scientist got that you don’t have? Let’s see you out-do them! Show us your best and most outlandish WATERMELON-O-LANTERN carving. - Dave Lavery

  #188 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

28 POINTS

For many years, military aircraft sported spectacular “nose art”— artistic homages to people, places, and ideas important to the aircraft crew. As aesthetically appealing as aircraft nose art may have been, we think they botched it on the choice of canvas. Show us your best nose art - but this time, get it right! All art must be on, around, or incorporate, your nose.

  #189 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

32 POINTS

The World’s Worst Lawyer.

  #190 

51 POINTS

Oranges are the new black! Let’s see your most a-peeling cocktail dress all made out of - you guessed it - orange peels. Pose in a crowded urban bar.

  #191 

72 POINTS

(Up to 30 seconds time-lapsed and/or edited.) You didn’t think we were going to let all those oranges go to waste, did you? Wall Drugs has signs announcing Wall Drugs locations hundreds of miles before you get to the store, so drivers get to anticipate the goodness coming. Place signs along 5 miles of road leading up to an orange juice stand that speaks hyperbolically of the life-changing rejuvenation of the coming refreshment with a countdown of the miles. You must have a sign at least every quarter of a mile along the path. If this is insurmountable to you, at the very least, host a freshly-squeezed orange juice party in your backyard for all of your neighbors. You won’t get POINTS for that, but you’ll use the juice and make some friends.

  #192 

47 POINTS

(Time lapse up to 25 seconds). In our busy world, people sometimes forget to slow down and see the beauty around them. Perform a task at work extremely slowly while everyone around you carries on at normal speed. When this is played back in in time lapse, you’re performing at normal speed and it’s the world around you that’s going too fast.

  #193 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

10 POINTS

The Riemann hypothesis of mathematics includes the Riemann zeta function, which categorizes some zeros as “non-trivial zeros” and others as “trivial zeros.” We think this unequal treatment of zeros, which are clearly all equal, is just wrong! Hold a protest in front of a university mathematics or computer science building with a sign that says something to the effect of”ALL ZEROS ARE EQUAL” or “NO ZEROS ARE TRIVIAL!”

  #194 - Link 

67 POINTS

Do you spend too much time indoors while you GISH? It’s time to get outside! Dust off your bicycle, grab a friend or two and go out and ride a 50-mile bike ride (this can be done over the entire period of the Hunt and may be done either on a long road trip somewhere or in different round trip legs to and from your house)! You must track your progress on a GPS drawing app. (Bonus POINTS if you draw a picture of a gishwhes mascot with your path.) Oh, by the way - you need to be wearing part of a pineapple or banana (in some fashion) while you ride. Submit an image of your GPS drawing. Yes, it would be easy to cheat on this item, but let’s all take the high road and practice honesty on this one.

  #195 

235 POINTS

(This video can be as long as it takes to do the job, but we hope the job goes quickly and it is gobbled up fast so the video is short!) Using a steel shredder, shred a decommissioned bus. It must be a full sized bus with at least 10 rows. It may be a school bus or a municipal bus. It may not be a VW MiniBus; it must have been built to seat at least 30. Paint a message that conveys the fact that gishwhes recycled becomes CFG (we’ll explain later). For example, you could write: “Recycled gishwhes = CFG” in large font the side of the bus. Feel free to word this differently, but convey that message. The bigger the bus the better. Oh and paint the windows of the bus to show it’s passengers. (Obviously no living being is in the bus.) Although you should upload a video as your submission, be sure to take pictures of the event in case we need those for the coffee table book (we’ll email you for them).

  #196 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

62 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! THIS IS A TOP SECRET ITEM! DO NOT SHARE ITS CONTENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA UNTIL DIRECTED OR YOU WILL RUIN THE SURPRISE AND BE DELUGED WITH BAD KARMA. By now, most of you may know our friend Giles Duley. If not, watch the video at the top of this page. Then, watch here to see what he did with us recently: https://youtu.be/-tOt9LfZF9w ...and he’s doing something amazing with us again with us this year (which we’ll be announcing VERY soon). Giles inspires us and we want to thank him for all of his hard (and often thankless) work. So, we’re going to thank him... BUT WE’RE GOING TO SURPRISE HIM! SO PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT POST ABOUT THIS UNTIL THE DESIGNATED TIME: On Friday, August 11th, at EXACTLY 9am PDT, we are going to give him a “thunderclap” of thanks on the Internet. Because Giles thinks EVERYONE can make a difference no matter their circumstances (and he’s a living embodiment of that), we’re going to prove it. Here’s your job: before the 11th, go out and do an act of kindness. But not just any act of kindness... Giles works hard to help refugee families and landmine victims, so your act of kindness should focus on expanding his work exponentially through the power of gishwhes and gishers. Do something that makes a meaningful, material difference in the life of either a refugee or someone who has been directly impacted by war. If you’re at a loss of how to do this, here are some suggestions: bring a care package to new refugees in your neighborhood, go to a refugee center and volunteer, bring a warm meal to a homeless veteran on the streets, volunteer at a soup kitchen where you know there are war veterans, make a donation to an organization that helps with reconstructive surgery and prosthetics for war victims, or sponsor a child made homeless by the war with a one-time or recurring donation. If you can’t manage to find or coordinate any of the above (but please try!), simply carry out a random act of kindness for another human being on the planet who could legitimately use some kindness. Dig deep on this one, guys. The goal is to cause a ripple effect from the work Giles is doing and expand it worldwide. Let’s do this. Capture an image or video of this act. At 9am PDT on Friday, August 11th, post the image or video on Facebook with a detailed description of what you did and crosspost to Twitter. Be sure to mention Giles in the post. (For Facebook, tag @GilesDuleyPhotography and on Twitter, tag @gilesduley with

#thanksGiles as the hashtag.) Submit the image or video you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post link in the comment field of the submit page.

  #197 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

24 POINTS

Play a few bars of a well-known tune on a well-known musical instrument—but not in the well-known manner. Play a cello tucked under your chin, a saxophone with mallets, or piano as a string instrument with a bow, that sort of thing. The more unexpected the utilization, the more POINTS. -David Pogue

  #198 

108 POINTS

CHANGE A LIFE. “It gives me hope. I feel special when I’m doing it. If something bad happens to me, all I have to do is dance...” -Timarandarin (14 years old)

Last year gishwhes worked with the charity Random Acts and Giles Duley’s Legacy of War to forever change the lives of three refugee families by raising over $250,000 in just a few days. Anybody who has seen these families’ smiles will know what an incredible impact we had working together.

This year, we are teaming up with Random Acts and Legacy of War again to grant the last wish of a dying woman, and in doing so, we will save the dreams of hundreds of children who live in some of the world’s poorest conditions.

Fiona Sargeant, a former ballet dancer from England, founded and runs a ballet school in an impoverished township in South Africa that for years has provided ballet instruction, meals, education, safe refuge and ultimately hope for hundreds of children. She is not a doctor, nor running a large foundation or charity, but she does know how to dance and she wanted to give back to the world. She is the living proof that EVERYONE can make a difference, if their heart is behind what they’re doing.

Sadly, Fiona has terminal cancer and only has weeks to live. Once she passes, she expects the school to be shut down. But there is a plan in motion that, if funded, would carry on her legacy. Let’s grant her dying wish and BY THE END OF THE HUNT let her know that her children will be taken care of long after she is gone.

She has no idea we are going to do this! We are going to surprise her with this colossal random act of kindness at the end of the Hunt!

We’ve created a Crowdrise page here that tells her story. DONATIONS ARE 100% TAX DEDUCTIBLE AND 100% OF THE DONATIONS GO TO THE SCHOOL (for countries other than U.S., deductions are contingent on your laws). The Gishwhes Item here: create a fundraising “page” for your team on Crowdrise where family, friends and others can donate. Since this is Gishwhes and there’s always an extra twist with everything we do, here’s the deal: we also want you to get OTHERS to donate to your team’s Crowdrise page. We know you don’t need “POINTS” as an incentive to help these kids, but since it is part of the Hunt, we want to maximize the power of these POINTS to help.

Here’s your assignment: start a page and get at least 10 donations from people or businesses NOT on your team. You and your team members are welcome to donate to your campaign, but that is not a requirement for POINTS— the Item requirement is to get at least 10 people to make a cumulative total of least 10 donations who are NOT on your team. There is no minimum amount to donate for GISHWHES purposes, but Crowdrise does require a minimum $10 donation be collected, and let’s all please encourage others to be generous above this so we can make a profound impact. SUBMIT a screenshot of your team’s page with a minimum of 10 donations on it. (To initially create a fundraising team, click the “Join the Team & Create Your Own Fundraiser“ button.)

  #199 

44 POINTS

Breaker, breaker! Tune in for details: CB Channel 27 (Frequency 27.27500) broadcasting near Lacy Park, San Marino, CA. (Latitude: 34.1204167 Longitude: -118.1201348) DATE & TIME: 8/7 12 PM PDT & 4:30PM PDT or 8/9 9 AM PDT. Listen on Broadcast CB CHANNEL 32 (Frequency 27.32500) broadcasting near Hermann Park Conservancy, Houston TX (Latitude: 29.7160286 Longitude: -95.3886413) DATE & TIME: 8/11 NOON CT

  #200 

72 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! She should run! First, research upcoming local, state, and federal elections in your area. Second, nominate, via social media posts, qualified female citizens you think should run for specific elected offices in those upcoming elections based on their qualifications and/or passion. Make a post on any or all of your social media handles, tag them (so they see it!), and explain why you want them to run, using the hashtag

#SheShouldRun. But your nomination post is not what you submit on our site! IF you manage to get a woman to publicly commit to running in the next election cycle this week via their social media, submit two images side-by-side: an image of your post “nominating” them to run, next to an screenshot of their social media post committing to run, and provide a link to their post in the comments field of the submit page. Note: Candidate must not have already announced their intent to run for office. We have assigned a special prosecutor to scour the internet for your candidate’s previous declarations of intent-to-run and will vet them.

  #201 

61 POINTS

Outside US: 00-1-323-645-0703 Within US: (323) 645-0703

  #202 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

46 POINTS

A gisher wrote me recently stating, “I started gishwhes in 2015 myself and my children all joined in and had the best week of our lives, so much fun, so much love, so much laughter. In December 2015 I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer… But I didn’t let it beat me. We signed up for gishwhes 2016 and made beautiful art together and performed many acts of kindness to those around us and in need, my children now 10 & 8 have those lessons in their hearts now, to spread kindness and love to all around them! Unfortunately I am too sick to participate this year, but hope to still be here to see all the wonderful creations everyone makes, and if I’m not still here when gishwhes starts I will be watching down on you all, cheering everyone on.” Obviously, I cried when I read that. We emailed her back, but haven’t heard back… So this one’s for you, S. (and your kids), with love from me & everyone in the gishwhes family: Find a local hospital or cancer center and coordinate with them to deliver a comfort bag(s) to a patient. Fill a cheerfully decorated canvas or cloth bag with items to provide palliative relief and comfort to a cancer patient: soft eye masks, scarves, a soft blanket, socks, ginger tea or candy, unscented natural lip balm, sudoku or coloring books, puzzles, poems, etc. Include a note of support or encouragement if you wish. (Please don’t say “get well soon.” Phrasing like, “we’re sending you our love” is better.) Please do not take a picture with the recipient... Just the bag. We trust you to deliver.

  #203 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<  

40 POINTS

THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Bearby Von Bearamucci has an interview for a position as White House Communications Director on Saturday, August 12th at 8pm ET sharp! He was all set to drive the Gishbus across the country, but its engine wouldn’t start and he has a terrible fear of flying. He’s counting on gishers to help get him from Redding, California to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington, DC before his appointment (by passenger car or truck only. NO PLANES, TRAINS, SHIPPING SERVICES, OR BUSES). Your instructions are here. Coordinate with other gishers to pick up Bearby and take him at least 5 miles, but no more than 100 miles, from your starting point. On your leg of the journey, post a pic of you, Bearby, and the gisher you’re handing him off to at a diner, rest stop, or point of interest (please geo-tag the location). Tag @gishwhes, the next gisher, and @BearbyVonB and use hashtag

#GetTheBearThere. You MUST hand Bearby off to the next gisher to complete your Item or you get zero POINTS. Submit your photo with Bearby to us and provide a link to your post in the comments field of the submit page. You will get 40 POINTS if you take a picture with Bearby and a sign with your team name on it, or 60 POINTS if you take a photo with Bearby and transport him (please include side-by-side image of the map POINTS as well). If he makes it to his appointment at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in D.C. by 8 PM ET on August 12th, you will get an additional 50% in POINTS (for a grand total of 60 POINTS for photo only, 90 POINTS for photo + transportation). Yes, we know how convoluted this item is and that it seems destined for failure— but I believe you’ll spit in failure’s eye and say, “Not today!” Sidebar: gishwhes HQ nearly came to blows as we debated over whether providing maps and tools to help facilitate your journey was “helping” and therefore “cheating”, but after a rousing bout of coleslaw-wrestling, “Team Give Them Maps” claimed creamy victory, and so you may use these resources to help you coordinate the journey. But feel free to ignore the map entirely. Because you’re better than that. IMPORTANT NOTES: 1. Members of the same team cannot collect multiple submissions for this item. 2. Make sure other teams get the chance to help Bearby! Yes, this means you can communicate and walk the line of “collaboration” in your hand-off attempts. 3. Individuals transporting Bearby must take him at least 5 miles or up to 100 miles in one trip. 4. You may NOT take him near your homes. We have a GPS locator on Bearby (due to past felonies) so we don’t want to compromise your home locations. 5. Do not exceed the speed limit by more than 5 miles per hour, because that’s what the cops are cool with, obviously. This isn’t Cannonball Run. Make it happen, gishers. Bearby is counting on you to help him land his dream job!

  #204 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

40 POINTS

Escape Gishwhes! https://www.gishwhes.com/escape-room/. If you manage to break out of this wild ride of mystery and mayhem, you’ll be prompted to enter your Team Name to document your success via an online form. BEFORE YOU HIT THE SUBMIT BUTTON, take a screenshot showing your team name in the Text Input Field and save the image, THEN hit the SUBMIT button. Your submission will be uploading the screenshot on our item list (backed up by what the online form sends gishbot).

  #205 

28 POINTS

We’ve received a bit of criticism that the hunt is “not really a scavenger hunt, it’s just Misha getting people to help him with his chores.” I’m honestly shocked anyone would say that! Also, people have been complaining that there are “too many geographically specific items” (items that require you to show up at a certain place). I want you to know that I’m listening and processing your feedback! So, I’m adding the following item: Help me help you help me help myself. Show up at 10 AM PDT sharp on August 11that this location in Bellingham, WA. Wear long sleeves (pants and shirt) and bring a small bucket. Pick at least ONE quart of blackberries and DEPOSIT them into my big vessel so I can make lots of jam. For the item submission you must do two things: 1) You must find the woman in the sock monkey hat with the sheet of paper who is taking down team names and 2) You must take a photo of yourself with your bucket of berries. We will cross-check our list with your submitted photo as your proof. No taking pictures with me, because last year we did that and it ended up taking forever. If no one one on your team lives nearby, you may assign a surrogate, but no surrogate may service more than one team.

  #206 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<<

17 POINTS

We got this letter to our support gnomes:

Name: [REDACTED]

Message : Hello Gishpeople. I want to question why there are so many specific-locations-that-aren’t-Sweden only items, and no Sweden only items. I speak for all Swedes when we say that we find this very saddening. We don’t understand how you could miss out on an opportunity like this, since Sweden is a very beautiful country, containting great things such as Dalahästar.

We, as a nation, expect a formal apology for this, of course.

All our love, and some sad wonders,

[REDACTED]

Sweden, you’re absolutely right! You are a beautiful country and it’s time we stopped overlooking you. You deserve a formal apology as requested and so in the interest of international diplomacy, it’s our duty to deliver and rectify this egregious oversight. With that in mind, (I hope you’ll forgive me but this is a location-specific image to appease Sweden, guys): Take a picture of yourself in front of the biggest landmark or point of interest in your town while holding a beautiful hand-lettered sign that reads, “We Are Sorry, Sweden”. This is a location-based item, so you may do this anywhere in the world... except Sweden.

  #207 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

48 POINTS

Nothing says “good life choices” like a last-minute rush job tattoo. Get inked with a tattoo that includes “We create therefore we live” or another gishy quote written in any language other than English. Feel free to adorn it with mascots or other hunt-inspired iconography. PS: Don’t try to repurpose an old tattoo— we’ll be able to tell and your team will be docked POINTS.

  #208 

18 POINTS

As you know, no one was able to successfully find Jared Padalecki or Jensen Ackles’ balls in Canada. Misha’s balls are a lot easier to find... maybe because they really get around. Find Misha’s balls in any of the following locations & take a picture with them. Then put them back EXACTLY where you found them so another team can have a chance to get their hands on Misha’s balls, too. LOCATIONS: near the Cathedral Basilica, Newark, NJ; outside Gatorland, Orlando, FL, near Rothko Chapel in Houston, Texas.

  #209 - Click Here <<<<<<<<<<<<< 

77 POINTS

Gishwhes is over tonight! Forever! The crumbs of the great multi-year, wild and weird global feast are soon to be all that’s left. Let’s see you work magic on these crumbs (real bread crumbs or whatever other crumbs you wish to use) and turn them into a portrait of actor Misha Collins.

[photographerguide-blog]

The Winners Of The 2018 Underwater Photography Competition Will Take Your Breath Away

New Post has been published on https://photographyguideto.com/must-see/the-winners-of-the-2018-underwater-photography-competition-will-take-your-breath-away/

The Winners Of The 2018 Underwater Photography Competition Will Take Your Breath Away

Underwater photography opens up a dimension of Mother Earth we don’t normally see. Blackwater diving and shallow reef paddling would be incredibly hard to explain if it wasn’t for the vivid images people brought from beneath the surface. Celebrating the beauty of waters from all over the world, the 7th Annual Ocean Art Underwater Photo Contest has just announced its winners, and the pictures speak for themselves.

“The purpose of the [competition] is to find and promote the world’s best underwater photographers and their work,” Underwater Photography Guide’s Managing Editor Nirupam Nigam told Bored Panda. “We’d also like to bring public awareness to the beauty of marine life and the necessity of its conservation. Ocean Art is about discovering and putting a spotlight on new/innovative photographic techniques, amazing animal behaviors, and the beauty of the world’s oceans.”

The judges evaluated thousands of entries from 70 countries before deciding which of them deserved to receive the over $80,000 in sponsor prizes across 16 different categories. “The 2018 competition was our most competitive year to date with a record number of entries. Images from this year’s competition show just how far underwater photographic technology and innovation from underwater photographers have come. As this innovation continues, we have seen a shift in preferred subjects for underwater photographers. It would seem that more photographers are now confident in shooting large pelagic subjects such as sharks, rays, humpback whales, and crocodiles. Although these are impressive subjects by themselves, we looked for the very best photos regardless of the subject. This year we saw an increase in entrants from Asia.”

Scroll down to check out the best images from the competition and read the stories behind them!

#1 1st Place, Wide-Angle Category, “Gentle Giants” By François Baelen

This unique encounter happened in September 2018 in Reunion Island (Western Indian Ocean) where the humpback whales come here to breed and give birth. The mother was resting 15 meters down, while her calf was enjoying his new human friends. Trust : this is what came to my mind, when this close to 30 ton-animal, still hunted today by mankind, allowed me to freedive behind her and take that shot. From…

This unique encounter happened in September 2018 in Reunion Island (Western Indian Ocean) where the humpback whales come here to breed and give birth. The mother was resting 15 meters down, while her calf was enjoying his new human friends. Trust : this is what came to my mind, when this close to 30 ton-animal, still hunted today by mankind, allowed me to freedive behind her and take that shot. From down there, everything seemed unreal: that huge tail centimeters away from me, the calf, my friend free diving symetrically. I knew I would not get a shot like this one again. The post production was all about getting a good white balance and reducing noise, because this photo was taken with natural light only, 15 meters deep.

#2 Honorable Mention, Portrait Category, “Curiosity” By Kyler Badten

My freedive parter and I were surrounded by green sea turtles feeding on algae that washed out from the rocky shoreline on Oahu’s North Shore. I turned to see this turtle swimming directly at me, which was a truly remarkable behavior that I have never experienced before. As I set up to capture the unique encounter, the curious turtle saw her reflection and continued to slowly approach until nearly bumping…

My freedive parter and I were surrounded by green sea turtles feeding on algae that washed out from the rocky shoreline on Oahu’s North Shore. I turned to see this turtle swimming directly at me, which was a truly remarkable behavior that I have never experienced before. As I set up to capture the unique encounter, the curious turtle saw her reflection and continued to slowly approach until nearly bumping my dome!

#3 Honorable Mention, Nudibranch, “Sheep On The Shot” By Chun Ho Tam

My dive master showed me this cute sheep during a dive in Lembeh, Indonesia. Its rouge face attracted me and I decided to take a face shot with snooting it to create a spot light effect.

#4 5th Place, Wide-Angle Category, “Eclipse” By Edwar Herreno

From August to November, golden rays migrate in large numbers in Costa Rican Pacific waters. No one knows the exact reason, but it can be to protection from predators or as a social/mating behavior. I was looking for this picture for years and after several weeks searching and working with biologist specialised in rays, I spotted a good place using my drone. I did several dives in this area and…

From August to November, golden rays migrate in large numbers in Costa Rican Pacific waters. No one knows the exact reason, but it can be to protection from predators or as a social/mating behavior. I was looking for this picture for years and after several weeks searching and working with biologist specialised in rays, I spotted a good place using my drone. I did several dives in this area and waited patiently, then When they came on top of me, I was shock and forgot that I had a camera in my hands. Any effort I did for this encounter, word it! Simply magic moment.

#5 1st Place, Macro Ocean, “Ancistrocheirus” By Jeff Milisen

One of the things that makes guiding a blackwater dive so rewarding is the chance to spread my passion to the 6 eager customers. But even guides have to let loose, and for that we find empty boat seats and tag along to hone our skills. On this night, I was going holo holo (for pleasure) when I found this sharp-eared enope squid just under the surface. Most enope squids…

One of the things that makes guiding a blackwater dive so rewarding is the chance to spread my passion to the 6 eager customers. But even guides have to let loose, and for that we find empty boat seats and tag along to hone our skills. On this night, I was going holo holo (for pleasure) when I found this sharp-eared enope squid just under the surface. Most enope squids are small and thus difficult to shoot. As they mature, the difficult paralarva comes into its own. Every detail in the arms, organs, and chromatophores blasts to life in radiant color. Such was the case with this gem of a specimen. At around 3 inches in length, it was easily the largest and prettiest sharp-eared enope squid I recall finding. I caught the guide’s glance and let him show it to the nearby customers, but soon the animal fled down, so I followed where the guide couldn’t. We descended past forty feet, fifty feet, sixty feet while I continued watching, studying, and shooting. Anywhere else and these would be shallow depths, but the middle of the ocean at night is a lonely place. I cruised slowly by seventy feet, the guide’s torch watching me. At eighty feet the kraken’s dancing and squirming still entranced me. Finally, at ninety feet deep, it was time to leave my new little friend at peace.

#6 3rd Place, Wide-Angle Category, “Two Inquisitive Friends” By Celia Kujala

The Australian sea lion is one of the most endangered pinnipeds in the world. One place they can be found is Essex Rocks in the Jurien Bay Marine Park. I was in shallow water, when two Australian sea lion pups swooshed in my direction. They were playing and zipping around each other in what appeared to be a beautiful underwater ballet. However, what happened next was even more special. As…

The Australian sea lion is one of the most endangered pinnipeds in the world. One place they can be found is Essex Rocks in the Jurien Bay Marine Park. I was in shallow water, when two Australian sea lion pups swooshed in my direction. They were playing and zipping around each other in what appeared to be a beautiful underwater ballet. However, what happened next was even more special. As they neared me, I must have piqued their interest because the two playful friends became two inquisitive friends and swam to check me out. I was able to capture them at the exact moment they were perfectly posed and staring at me with their curious eyes. I love observing wildlife underwater, but the moments when one connects with wildlife are even more extraordinary. I hope to share with people the magic that I felt.

#7 Honorable Mention, Mirrorless Macro, “Face To Face” By Rafi Amar

When I took this picture, a lot of sharks were walking around me, and my Buddy did not understand why I was diving with a macro lens, but I had to photograph this shy fish. For more than an hour I waited for this picture but finally it was worth it.

#8 3rd Place, Marine Life Behavior, “Love From A Father” By François Baelen

When it comes to clownfishes, we can safely say that Daddy does everything he can to make sure the next generation is safe. He takes care of the eggs by making them breathe with his fins; he removes dust, debris and dead eggs from the nest. This was a really lucky shot as I was trying a new wetlens (+20 diopter). It is pretty hard to use because its depth…

When it comes to clownfishes, we can safely say that Daddy does everything he can to make sure the next generation is safe. He takes care of the eggs by making them breathe with his fins; he removes dust, debris and dead eggs from the nest. This was a really lucky shot as I was trying a new wetlens (+20 diopter). It is pretty hard to use because its depth of field is so shallow that I had to focus manually. What a surprise it was to get this lovely behavior and the clownfish eye in perfect focus!

#9 Honorable Mention, Portrait Category, “Nemo” By Matteo Visconti

The relationship between the ocellaris clownfish that dwell among the tentacles of Ritteri sea anemones is a good example of mutualism. The territorial fish protects the anemone from anemone-eating fish, and in turn the stinging tentacles of the anemone protect the clownfish from its predators.

#10 2nd Place, Novice Dslr, “Smile Of A Friend” By Antonio Pastrana

In my photo dreams I always had the idea of capturing a wild crocodile. But even when I have seen many in the wild, I have never been able to get in the water with one. That morning we saw this crocodile called El Niño. I was told he was nice enough to let you get close to him. He was watching us for quite some time and, when we…

In my photo dreams I always had the idea of capturing a wild crocodile. But even when I have seen many in the wild, I have never been able to get in the water with one. That morning we saw this crocodile called El Niño. I was told he was nice enough to let you get close to him. He was watching us for quite some time and, when we decided to go in the water, I was nervous but excited. I approached him close to 10 feet when he started to move towards me, I got more nervous than before but he moved gently so I knew he wasn’t mad. He came towards me but dived underneath, so I turned around to follow him closely. When he turned around to face me, I had the opportunity to take this picture with a big smile. After getting the shot I edited in Lightroomma bit of exposure, less contrast, some highlights and less shadows and some clarity cropping the image on the right bottom side to get more close and giving the shot more balance.

#11 1st Place, Cold Water, “Grey Seal Face” By Greg Lecoeur

#12 Honorable Mention, Portrait Category, “Roar” By Jinggong Zhang

This kind of species chaenopsid blenny was found in rocky reefs around Japan, in the northwestern Pacific Ocean. It features a Mohican-like “haircut,” which is usually in red, yellow, or black. This photo of blenny cleaning up its lair was taken in Kanagawaken, Japan.

#13 2nd Place, Wide-Angle Category, “Paddle Boarders Sunset” By Grant Thomas

Stand up paddle boarders were out exploring the shallow reefs at sunset. I wanted to demonstrate the innate bond humans have with the ocean, whether we are physically in it or floating on the surface. Our inherent relationship with the ocean is eternal and we must care for it in a way that ensures sustainability for the future.

#14 2nd Place, Underwater Art, “Two Worlds Collide” By Jordan Robins

‘Two Worlds Collide’ is an over under photo captured of a vivid sunrise at Hyams Beach, Jervis Bay. Above the water is clouds in the sky bursting to life with colour from the rising sun. Below the water is a series of parallel lines of sand formed by the continual rise and fall of the ocean.This photo took nearly six months to capture with multiple failed attempts along the way….

‘Two Worlds Collide’ is an over under photo captured of a vivid sunrise at Hyams Beach, Jervis Bay. Above the water is clouds in the sky bursting to life with colour from the rising sun. Below the water is a series of parallel lines of sand formed by the continual rise and fall of the ocean.This photo took nearly six months to capture with multiple failed attempts along the way. I wanted to capture vivid colours in the sky contrasted with the crystal-clear water and unique formations in the sand below the water’s surface. On this particular morning, I was rewarded with an amazing sunrise and crystal clear calm water.I used my two inon-z240 strobes to light up below the water and balance the exposure with the sky. During post processing I added a little bit of blue to the water to create a dynamic contrast with the fiery reds in the sky, creating an almost psychedelic like scene.

#15 Honorable Mention, Underwater Art, “Light Beam” By Alexandre St. Jean

Cenotes are sacred places to the Mayans. They are doorways to Xibalbá – the Mayan Underworld. On an expedition through the Yucatan Peninsula, Professional Freediver Carlos Coste and I were brought to a very beautiful and remote Cenote by our friend and local guide, Pedro Castillo. There, we were privy to a beautiful, clear and unoccupied Cenote. As we got our gear on, a light beam appeared in the water…

Cenotes are sacred places to the Mayans. They are doorways to Xibalbá – the Mayan Underworld. On an expedition through the Yucatan Peninsula, Professional Freediver Carlos Coste and I were brought to a very beautiful and remote Cenote by our friend and local guide, Pedro Castillo. There, we were privy to a beautiful, clear and unoccupied Cenote. As we got our gear on, a light beam appeared in the water from above. For a couple hours each day, the sun peaks through the hole of the Cenote and shapes the light into a perfect tube. Needless to say, we used every second of light to capture photos of this wonderful phenomenon in order to show its mystical beauty. The sense of awe and tranquility felt in Cenotes are enrapturing. You can definitely feel the energy of Xibalbá.

#16 4th Place, Portrait Category, “Eye To Eye” By Shane Keena

A curious and quite playful humpback whale calf comes in for a close look in an amazing few seconds between two sentient beings. This calf was rolling around as its mom slept then swam towards me, turning and slowing down just long enough for us to make eye to eye contact.

#17 5th Place, Marine Life Behavior, “New Life” By Flavio Vailati

I usually dive in Capo Noli Italy. One morning in July I met a beautiful specimen of an octopus in a tube that was caring for its eggs.

#18 1st Place, Marine Life Behavior And Best Of Show By Duncan Murrell

Spinetail devil rays, (Mobula japanica) engaged in rarely observed or photographed courtship behaviour with two males pursuing one female.

#19 1st Place, Nudibranch, “Inside The Eggs” By Flavio Vailati

During a dive in Anilao, Philippines I found this nudibranch and I waited for the best time to make this shot.

#20 2nd Place, Compact Macro, “Red On Green” By Kate Tinson

North Sulawesi is Kate a wonderful go-to dive vacation spot. This shot was taken on our first day of the trip at Bunaken Island in June 2018 after arriving at 1am that morning. The colour of the coral and the beautifully symmetrical patterns are always attractive, and I was lucky enough to capture a very co-operative coral goby who posed like a real professional which produced these wonderful complementary…

North Sulawesi is Kate a wonderful go-to dive vacation spot. This shot was taken on our first day of the trip at Bunaken Island in June 2018 after arriving at 1am that morning. The colour of the coral and the beautifully symmetrical patterns are always attractive, and I was lucky enough to capture a very co-operative coral goby who posed like a real professional which produced these wonderful complementary colours.

#21 2nd Place, Portrait Category, “Croc In The Mist” By Christina Barringer

“Croc in the Mist” was a fierce shot. As quick as this young croc made its appearance, it charged towards my dive partner. With no camera to use as a barrier, she was vulnerable. As it kicked up the sand, visibility became poor. So I quickly pushed myself in front of my dive partner and dove down, using my large camera as a barrier. But first, I just had to…

“Croc in the Mist” was a fierce shot. As quick as this young croc made its appearance, it charged towards my dive partner. With no camera to use as a barrier, she was vulnerable. As it kicked up the sand, visibility became poor. So I quickly pushed myself in front of my dive partner and dove down, using my large camera as a barrier. But first, I just had to snap this shot!

#22 2nd Place, Marine Life Behavior , “The Fight” By Anders Nyberg

Me and my dive guide were looking for some Ghost Pipefish and other small critters, so I had prepared my Nikon D500 with a 105 mm macro lens. Swimming around and looking for small stuff, suddenly we saw these two two beautiful male Anthias fighting and spinning around. I was aware of my camera gear would be quite wrong for this to Anthias but I had to try to take…

Me and my dive guide were looking for some Ghost Pipefish and other small critters, so I had prepared my Nikon D500 with a 105 mm macro lens. Swimming around and looking for small stuff, suddenly we saw these two two beautiful male Anthias fighting and spinning around. I was aware of my camera gear would be quite wrong for this to Anthias but I had to try to take some pictures. The hardest part was that I needed to be a bit far from the Anthias because my macro lens, so there was a lack of light from my strobes. Despite that I managed to catch these two anthias fighting by using a long exposure so it has given the image an ethereal glow and energy. Neither me nor the dive guide had seen anything like it and it was a fantastic experience. For post-processing I used white balance, contrast, shadows, clarity, sharpening and dehaze

#23 4th Place, Macro Ocean, “Dance Of Love” By Jinggong Zhang

Sea horses usually have a long dance of courtship before mating. They will move in sync and swim around each other. After a few seconds, the female puts the eggs into the males’ pouch through ovipositor to complete the fertilization. Unlike most species, the birth of the sea horses are done by males. This mating photo was taken in Minamatashi, Kumamotoken in Japan. This species sea horses was officially recognized…

Sea horses usually have a long dance of courtship before mating. They will move in sync and swim around each other. After a few seconds, the female puts the eggs into the males’ pouch through ovipositor to complete the fertilization. Unlike most species, the birth of the sea horses are done by males. This mating photo was taken in Minamatashi, Kumamotoken in Japan. This species sea horses was officially recognized in 2017. To hide from natural enemies, sea horses usually swim out of hiding seaweed and mate at sunrise in the morning. After mating, they hide into the depths of seaweed immediately.

#24 2nd Place, Mirrorless Macro, “Bubble Life” By Owen Yen

When I saw this green nudi in Boergeseniaforbesii(Siphonocladales), I felt that it looks like the HULK but more cute. It ate the chlorophyll and stay in Boergeseniaforbesii to make its own BUBBLE LIFE.

#25 2nd Place, Cold Water, “Burst” By Tyler Schiffman

: I was diving the break wall in Monterey bay and this week in particular had over 40 foot vis for 3 days straight. I had been shooting kelp bursts all day as the light was exploding amongst the canopy above. I had framed this shot waiting for a sea lion to swim by. After 5 minutes, one swam up and paused for a few seconds, I took…

: I was diving the break wall in Monterey bay and this week in particular had over 40 foot vis for 3 days straight. I had been shooting kelp bursts all day as the light was exploding amongst the canopy above. I had framed this shot waiting for a sea lion to swim by. After 5 minutes, one swam up and paused for a few seconds, I took 3 photos and as rare as it was the moment left in a blink of an eye.

#26 3rd Place, Nudibranch, “Frosted Pearl” By Bettina Balnis

Beside giant jellyfishes, octopuses, and seastars – all subjects too big for my macro lense – I suddenly saw this beautiful creature crawling on a kelp leave. Fantastic. I watched it until the end of the dive. Never saw such a beautiful nudibranch again

#27 4th Place, Wide-Angle Category, “West Coast Flowers” By Geo Cloete

Each year during the early spring, the normally barren looking West Coast landscape of South Africa undergoes a magnificent transformation as millions of wildflowers bloom and decorates the landscape in a kaleidoscope of colours as far as the eye can see. When I stumbled upon this scene of sandy anemones (Aulactinia reynaudi) whilst exploring the West Coast coastline, it immediately reminded me of the yearly flower season of the region. Only…

Each year during the early spring, the normally barren looking West Coast landscape of South Africa undergoes a magnificent transformation as millions of wildflowers bloom and decorates the landscape in a kaleidoscope of colours as far as the eye can see. When I stumbled upon this scene of sandy anemones (Aulactinia reynaudi) whilst exploring the West Coast coastline, it immediately reminded me of the yearly flower season of the region. Only in this instance nature treats us to this beautiful display year round and a wonderful reason to appreciate and give recognition to the wonders of our coastline much more. In order to capture as wide a field of view as possible, I relied on my trusty fisheye lens and applied a lens correction function.

#28 2nd Place, Nudibranch, “Polycera Quadrilineata Posing” By Fredrik Ehrenström

This image was taken in the early spring 2012 at 10 m depth in the algal belt surrounding the old ferry dock of Bremsnes in Norway. Spring time is nudibranch time along the coasts of Scandinavia. The one-year-old adults spawn and large amounts of fully grown adults (3-4 cm) can be seen on the leaves of Oar Weed (Laminaria digitata), together with their curtainlike eggmasses. Some individuals raise their bodies…

This image was taken in the early spring 2012 at 10 m depth in the algal belt surrounding the old ferry dock of Bremsnes in Norway. Spring time is nudibranch time along the coasts of Scandinavia. The one-year-old adults spawn and large amounts of fully grown adults (3-4 cm) can be seen on the leaves of Oar Weed (Laminaria digitata), together with their curtainlike eggmasses. Some individuals raise their bodies in search for something, maybe another nudibranch for mating? This behavior has been utilized to get an image with a clean composition.

#29 3rd Place, Macro Ocean, “Speedy Cuttlefish” By Fabio Iardino

During a night dive, I met this cuttlefish. Intrigued by his way of moving, I tried a technique of slow sync flash to get a shot with an effect of movement.

#30 1st Place, Mirrorless Wide Angle, “Spotted Dolphin” By Eugene Kitsios

Before you enter the water with a pod of dolphins, you never know what the interaction will be like. Sometimes you may have a great encounter, where the dolphins will curiously swim around you or show you some kind of playful behaviour. Other times they may leave you without interest. The best way to interact with them is to let them decide. Times where you are accepted by the pod…

Before you enter the water with a pod of dolphins, you never know what the interaction will be like. Sometimes you may have a great encounter, where the dolphins will curiously swim around you or show you some kind of playful behaviour. Other times they may leave you without interest. The best way to interact with them is to let them decide. Times where you are accepted by the pod are truly a magical experience. These intelligent creatures display so much interesting behaviour and in this case they playfully and curiously swimmed by me.

#31 6th Place, Marine Life Behavior, “Cleaning” By Liang Fu

A white-banded cleaner shrimp hopped into the mouth of a grouper to have some leftover food. While at the same time, the grouper has its mouth cleaned by the shrimp. This cleaning behavior ensures both species mutually benefit from this symbiotic relationship. I am fascinated by this behaviorbetween the grouper and the shrimp. To capture this moment, I tried to use a snoot with side-back lighting to create a strong…

A white-banded cleaner shrimp hopped into the mouth of a grouper to have some leftover food. While at the same time, the grouper has its mouth cleaned by the shrimp. This cleaning behavior ensures both species mutually benefit from this symbiotic relationship. I am fascinated by this behaviorbetween the grouper and the shrimp. To capture this moment, I tried to use a snoot with side-back lighting to create a strong shadow of the body of the grouper while at the same time lighting up the mouth. Lucky enough when a shrimp jumped just on the edge of the mouth, I got the photo that I was hoping for.

#32 1st Place, Underwater Art, “Disco Nudi” By Bruno Van Saen

I was trying to create an image right out of the camera using special own-made backgrounds. But at the end, it was the photoshop filter ‘swirl’ which helped me a lot to end up with this creative image.

#33 1st Place, Mirrorless Behavior, “My Babies” By Fabrice Dudenhofer

Read more: http://www.boredpanda.com/

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Gishwhes 2017 Item List - Updated/Complete

#1  -  66 POINTS  -  Do you live near (or within a fun road trip’s length of) some sand dunes or a beach? If so, the time has come to fulfill your destiny. Make a massive portrait (must be larger than 20 square meters - the larger the better) of either someone who inspires you, or a message of hope beautifully written in sand. Use a drone to capture footage, if helpful. Make sure you are not working on protected or ecologically sensitive dunes. #2  -  20 POINTS  -  There was a hobby or talent that you used to do when you were younger that you stopped doing for whatever reason. Do it again. Now. #3  -  52 POINTS  -  Pancake art has come a long way, and the art form doesn’t get the respect it deserves. Let’s see pancake art of Guernica, Judith Slaying Holofernes, The Weeping Woman, anything by Heronymous Bosch, or another famous work. (You may not do the Mona Lisa or anything abstract.) #4  -  62 POINTS  -  As anyone who reads “Cosmopolitan” magazine knows, bohemian eco-chic weddings are all the rage. Let’s see a wedding dress made from recycled office paper. #5  -  42 POINTS  -  Nobody likes elevator music in an elevator - unless it’s flute or pan flute music played by a wood nymph. (We must see unsuspecting passengers in the elevator with the wood nymph.) #6  -  19 POINTS  -  Re-enact the experience of your birth, using (only) shadow puppets. #7  -  44 POINTS  -  (Up to 2 minutes.) You love your grandparents, or your great-grandparents, but you've never heard their stories. Get one of them to tell you about the two most transformative experiences of their early life, before they turned 30. These must be experiences that shaped them into the people they are today. They may be difficult situations or lucky ones, but they must be transformative. Subject(s) must be more than 80 years old. #8  -  82 POINTS  -  The year is 2021. Of all the unique and amazing human specimens on Earth, it was hard for the aliens to choose which ones to collect, but your team stood out as being excessively weird & worth “analysis". Your entire team was abducted and put into an alien specimen box. In grid form, show each member of your team along with a card explaining where they got you (city, country) and a word stating what special characteristic makes you unique. #9  -  29 POINTS  -  I can assure you, THAT has never been frozen in jello before! How did you manage to do that?! #10  -  51 POINTS  -  Pizza was invented in Italy in 997 AD to honor the Queen Consort, Queen Margherita. The next significant event in Italian history was the start of the Renaissance Period in the 14th century, which spawned a revival in art, architecture, science and learning. Let’s celebrate these two seminal moments in Italian history. Bake a Pizza decorated as a Renaissance painting that would make the Old Masters proud. #11  -  82 POINTS  -  There are many old ghost towns around the world. I’ve been told, however, that almost all of these are fake and do not contain real ghosts. I refuse to believe this. Help me prove them wrong. Let’s see ghosts (at least 6) doing typical small-town activities (shopping, dropping stuff off in the mailbox, porch sitting, walking ghost dogs, as crossing guards and school kids, etc.) in one of the actual ghost towns at the link above (or in another legitimately publicized ghost town). Provide a caption to your image or video with the name of the ghost town , and the State or Province and Country you’re in. #12  -  29 POINTS  -  Many of us have lost pets in our lifetime. As a memorial to a loved pet that is now frolicking in the clouds chasing or sniffing whatever it was that pet liked to chase/sniff, write a poem or haiku about that loved one, or create a small shrine in nature comprised of items the dog loved and a photo of him or her. #13  -  41 POINTS  -  (Side by side) A child drawing of their idea of happiness. Then, make it happen. #14  -  48 POINTS  -  Over the years gishwhes has always been a supporter of first responders (firemen, paramedics, ER medics, nurses, police, etc.). Let’s give them one last treatment of a proper gishwhes “THANK YOU!” Find your nearest and dearest first responders and bring them The Most Epic Cookies or Pastries the World Has Ever Seen (MECOPWHES). #15  -  23 POINTS  -  Groucho Marx a piece of fruit. No, we don’t know what this means either, but we’re excited to see what you come up with. #16  -  29 POINTS  -  (Up to 2 minutes.) Take your parent back to the place where they lived when they were 10. Find someone they knew from then and ask them to recall a shared memory. #17  -  69 POINTS  -  Spicy Art! Using the spices you have in your spice cupboard, make a picture of your favorite (1) comic book cover, or (2) cartoon character. Either submit it alone, or as a side-by-side image comparison. #18  -  63 POINTS  -  Create or provide “gishwhes” welcome blankets (if it’s cold) or cold water and snacks (if it’s hot) for newly arriving immigrants… anywhere on the planet. Here’s some inspiration for you. #19  -  38 POINTS  -  (Side-by-side image) A photo of your pet and a photo of the portrait of your pet that you have made from their own food and treats. #20  -  41 POINTS  -  This family’s toys get into sweet, crazy escapades at night while the kids are sleeping. Your family’s toys make that family’s toys look like do-gooders. Let’s see what happened with your family’s toys while you slept last night. #21  -  41 POINTS  -  Let’s see the world famous once-every-3000-years “Spectral Olympics”. #22  -  50 POINTS  -  We finally have a confirmed sighting of a mythical beast from urban legends (Bigfoot, Nessie, Yeti, etc.) suffering the effects of climate change. #23  -  39 POINTS  -  This morning, my daughter, Maison reported having seen a “moon fairy” while I was sleeping last night. As you know, the rarely-seen moon fairies are mischievous, nocturnal creatures who participate in synchronized, representational flight. Using a long exposure and flashlights (or other movable light sources) photograph these elusive beasts. #24  -  43 POINTS  -  She wore a raspberry beret… Wear a beret made out of raspberries as you shop in a second-hand store. #25  -  56 POINTS  -  Wombat poop is shaped like little bricks. Sounds like the perfect building material for a tiny house! Show us! If we can figure out the architectural style you chose from your structure - bonus points! You’ll probably have to go to a local zoo to ask for collections of this building material. Enjoy your visit while you’re there. Your image must contain a caption that shares a little known fact about wombats. #26  -  101 POINTS  -  (Create an old-school STOP MOTION film - up to 1 minute.) A Romeo and Juliet story... Two young virile socks (unmatched) meeting, falling in love, being kept apart and finally ending tragically. #27  -  48 POINTS  -  The Internet has brought us all closer together, so this should be really easy: find someone from one of the 10 smallest countries in the world. Have them send you a forced perspective photo of something very small that makes that object look huge in front of a famous public landmark or historical site in that country. Caption the photo with “Big things happen in the tiny nation of [insert country name].” Teams may not share submissions with other teams, so make sure your tiny country helper isn’t helping someone else. #28  -  58 POINTS  -  Finger-painting is often thought of as unsophisticated and associated with preschool. But we know it can be deployed for much loftier purposes. Prove the art historians and elitists wrong by finger painting a sophisticated mural with complex messaging about an important global issue on the wall of a classroom. You may want to get a pre-schooler or two to help just to make sure you’re doing it right! #29  -  37 POINTS  -  It is either winter or summer where you are. (If it is not, please contact our support so we can send NASA to find you.) There’s something you love to do outdoors in the winter or summer where you live. Do the activity you love to do in the opposite season that you are in. #30  -  41 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Shelter pets rarely get any attention and millions are put down each year. Many times this can be avoided if people on the Interwebs (who would like and could responsibly own a pet) were to see how cute, available, lonely and cuddly they are. Let’s save a pet or two (or thousands). Grab a friend or two and visit a shelter. Spend some time with one or more of the pets there. Post a selfie of your favorite pet looking for a “forever home” on Twitter or Instagram, tagging @NewLeashUSA, using hashtag #adoptmeplease, and the social media handle or name of the shelter (so people can contact them). Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post link in the comment field of the submit page. #31  -  44 POINTS  -  You’ll find all you need to complete this item here: https://yung.cloud/index.php?a=track&id=29451 #32  -  50 POINTS  -  Visit a local bakery or food market. Get them to donate still-edible items to a women’s shelter. Speak to the women’s shelter first to make sure they will accept donations like this. Submit an image of you at the women’s shelter donating the food items. Edit to add: Note:Please don't take images that include any of the residents in the background out of respect to their safety & privacy. #33  -  73 POINTS  -  From @gishwhes twitter feed: Everyone knows the most ticklish parts of planes are on the undersides of the wings (or "wing pits", to use proper aircraft terminology). Let’s see the wing pits on a full-sized airplane. You can go true bohemian, decorative, or high and tight groomer - but it must really look like (or be) hair to count. #34  -  89 POINTS  -  As this is likely the last year of gishwhes we should probably do something to memorialize it. A lot of folks have been saying, “Save gishwhes!” But we say, “Shave “gishwhes”... into the back of your head.” Try to match the amazing logo that Olivia Desianti formed way back when - which we still use today. Bonus points if you include the current or a former gishwhes hybrid mascot in your masterpiece. The same design shaved into a thick matt of back or chest hair would be an acceptable substitute. #35  -  44 POINTS  -  Hand a bouquet of flowers (or a single flower) to a person leaving a house of worship that is not your religion. For example, if you are a Christian, you could hand a bouquet of flowers to someone leaving a mosque. If you’re Jewish, hand flowers to someone at a Christian church, etc. With the flowers, attach a note saying something in your own words, but to the effect of: “I may not worship in the same building as you, and I may not pray to the same prophets, but I am grateful to be sharing this planet with you in peace.” #36  -  23 POINTS  -  The dewey decimal system has long been responsible for keeping good books apart— books that clearly deserve to spend a life together on library shelves. For that matter, it seems so many libraries go out of their way to keep perfectly good literary companions apart as they separate fact from fiction, biography from archaeology, science fiction from politics. Be the matchmaker literature needs and get creative at your local library or bookstore. Show the spines of at least six books together in a library or bookstore (the more titles the better) the titles of which create the perfect oxymoronic sentence or phrase. - Monica Duff #37  -  92 POINTS  -  No one talks about the fact that the destruction of the Death Star put thousands of Stormtroopers out of work. Luckily the Empire has a pretty robust social safety net and most of them have been retrained and placed in new jobs, the majority of which have been in the transportation sector. Let’s see a stormtrooper driving/flying a large passenger vehicle. Must be for mass transit, not just a car or a van. A subway, train, bus, ferry, plane, etc. #38  -  43 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Pick a celebrity social media image post (or an advertisement) and recreate it with a subtle twist like like Celeste Barber does here. Tweet, Instagram or FB post your image side-by-side with the original image, “#embracereality @gishwhes” and your team name. (You may also tag or mention the celebrity or brand you are satirizing.) Submit the image you take side-by-side with the original one, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. #39  -  29 POINTS  -  You’ve heard of Cabbage Patch Kids, Garbage Pail Kids, and the Pacific Garbage patch. Let’s see a Great Pacific Garbage Patch Kid, (a cabbage-patch kid made from garbage you pick up from your local beach or lakefront), complete with adoption certificate. #40  -  51 POINTS  -  (Up to 30 seconds.) THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT!. Have a full church choir sing Carry on My Wayward Son while wearing dental cheek retractors. Please make sure that the video shows some of the singers’ faces up close. Then, share the video via twitter with the band Kansas (@kansasband) with @mishacollins @gishwhes.” Submit the video on our site but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. - Nicki Bentley-Colthart #41  -  21 POINTS  -  Show us your own personal “Stairway to Heaven” -Dylan Cacador #42  -  48 POINTS  -  You ever heard of “pond dipping”? “river bugging”? Neither have we - but let’s not let that stop us. Invent and show off your own *SAFE* summer wet, wild and messy activity and caption it with a clever name. #43  -  39 POINTS  -  Never judge a book by its cover… or bread by its shape. Bake bread or cookies into the shape of something you would DEFINITELY not want to eat. (We hate to have to say this every year, but pornographic pastries will result in docked points.) #44  -  56 POINTS  -  (Time-lapse up to 20 seconds.) A snail (or similarly VERY slow insect or worm) crossing a path or going up a wall. Put or stick objects in its path so it has to change directions multiple times. Then have it go through some “winner” gates at the end of its arduous trek. To make it a gripping adventure, you’ve dropped frames and turned this into a fast-paced adventure and set it to 1980s video game music, complete with a grand finale sound at the end when it makes it through the gates. #45  -  72 POINTS  -  You may not be aware, but leather-clad, tattoo-covered biker gangs love to hang out and play in those inflatable bouncy castles. Catch them in the act! #46  -  29 POINTS  -  THE FINAL “KALE” ART. (Please note that per Commandment #4 of the 2017 Hunt, this word and material as a Hunt item is not permitted. We are aware of this. That being said, we do not care. You still may not use the word “kale”. Henceforth, it shall be called [REDACTED] BUT you may use it as a material for this item.) Therefore, take a SINGLE glorious piece of [REDACTED] and, using whatever adornments or other decoratives, clipping patterns, etc., create a stunning, museum worthy piece of art that shall then be showcased (and submitted as such) as an ornamental headpiece on you. #47  -  63 POINTS  -  Your strict neighborhood HOA (Homeowners’ Association) got replaced by a better HOA: the Hopeful Optimist’s Association. They’ve decided that your lawn isn’t quite up to regulations. Get your front yard up to snuff by building a large-scale, jaw-dropping sculpture or structure dedicated to Hope. Make it so magnificent that motorists backup & park to gaze at its beauty. (Conversely, it could be that YOUR neighborhood HOA got replaced by the Horrible Organization for Awfulness... You get where we're going with this, right?) #48  -  48 POINTS  -  As most people know, roosters enjoy a good sunrise. But other farm animals enjoy sunrises and sunsets, too. Let's see a photo of you, some friends or companions (such as your dog), and a sheep, horse, cow, or other non-rooster barnyard animal, watching the sun rise or set together. Bonus points if the spectacular skies are reflected in water in front of you. #49  -  37 POINTS  -  There’s something important that your local or national politicians are not attending to properly. Stand in front of something that represents the issue/right/minority group/etc. that you care about and that your politicians are not adequately protecting and hold a large, hand-written sign with a message to the powers that be. Tweet this image to an elected official with the power to do something to help tagged “#gishwhesrights”. Submit the image and a link to your tweet in the comments. #50  -  51 POINTS  -  Have too much of a good thing, by which we mean a cream-filled balloon the size of a volley ball. Volley, volley, spike! Play a game of volleyball with it in the middle of a busy plaza. #51  -  47 POINTS  -  Anyone who serves in the military is risking their life to serve their nation. Being respectful to not trespass on military grounds, stand in front of a large military craft, ship, tank, or plane with an inclusive sign of thanks to every service member of every kind. You may post this image on social media prior to the end of the hunt, if you choose. Submit the image with a link to your post in the comment section (if you chose to post it). #52  -  41 POINTS  -  (Time-lapse up to 30 seconds.) Paint a dignified portrait of a President, Prime Minister, King, or Queen. But we don’t want you to waste canvas or paper! Paint this on a loved one’s bare back or abdomen. (use skin safe paints or edible “paint-like” food products!) #53  -  33 POINTS  -  Write something in frosting on a cake that you’ve always wanted to say to someone, and deliver it to them. #54  -  40 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Listen to this and be scared: http://www.radiolab.org/story/nukes/. But this bill has been introduced to try to solve this global risk. Let’s get it approved! Tweet ALL of your senators to pass the legislation to make congressional approval for first nuclear strike US law. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide a link to the tweet in the comment field of the submit page. #55  -  34 POINTS  -  Make a homemade Castiel kite with a child. We must see the kite in flight. #56  -  41 POINTS  -  Sometimes things are just too comfy to leave, but you’re prepared for this! Let’s see you in your “Hammock Self-Containment Unit”. This, of course, would be you in a hammock with everything you need to live for one week, including all life preserving items, sanitation supplies and, of course, entertainment (live or otherwise). Make sure it’s clean, well organized, and designed for easy access to everything. #57  -  52 POINTS  -  Show us a beautiful mermaid or sea creature performing a politically defiant modern dance solo to the beautiful music of the Sea Organ at Zadar. (Can’t make it to Zadar? The wave organ in San Francisco or the high tide organ in Blackpool may be substituted.) #58  -  89 POINTS  -  It’s time to recreate the epic historic Great Zombie vs. Vampire World War II. As you recall, this particular battle took place with Nerf guns (homemade or otherwise) in an arena, forest or field, and was wild, gruesome, and featured multiple soldiers. #59  -  59 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! This item takes place on Friday, Aug 11th, in whatever city you’re in at 10am in your time zone. Stand in front of your state or province’s legislative building (the building where your laws are enacted) and with your friends, hold up a large sign showing an excerpt or summary of a law that protects civil rights. For example if you live in the US, you could hold up a sign with a portion of the 1st amendment of the US Constitution written on it. Use the hashtag #gishwhes4rights. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. #60  -  51 POINTS  -  (Up to 30 seconds - you may speed up or slow down the video if you need to.) Using only air-moving devices or machines, successfully navigate a balloon through a strange series of obstacles. It must be suspended in the air, without anyone or anything other than moving air touching it. It must travel at least 10 yards and culminate with your friend popping it with a needle sticking out from a hat they’re wearing. #61  -  76 POINTS  -  (As long as it takes to complete the song.) THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! James Corden hosts Carpool Karaoke in the US— a viral show that has celebrities singing songs with him in a car. (Yes, we realize this is typical lowbrow-American TV, but it works.) We want to upgrade carpool karaoke and make it more high-brow. Create your own carpool karaoke with a political or intellectual powerhouse. Your co-singer must be either a nobel laureate, MacArthur Fellow, a national elected official, Bill Nye, Jane Goodall, Neil deGrasse Tyson, or any past or present member of the Harlem Globetrotters. Oh, and your karaoke song must have sufficient gravitas and must be an 80s pop song. For example, “Like a Virgin” would do nicely. Shoot your video Carpool Karaoke style. Tweet the video to @JKCorden with #gishwhesloveskaraoke and mention who your passenger is in the post. Upload the video on our submit page but be sure to provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. #62  -  42 POINTS  -  Honeybees are a “keystone” species just like sharks. If they’re gone, we’re in big trouble. Unfortunately, there are currently “Colony Collapse Disorders” happening with honeybees throughout the world. This is when the majority of worker bees in a colony disappear, leaving the queen and immature bees to fend for themselves (most colonies completely die). This has major global food crop implications, as honeybees perform the magic of pollination of agricultural crops. If bees go by the wayside, we will have to find alternative pollination solutions, and that ain’t gonna be easy. But, let’s roll up our sleeves and give it a shot: Plant something in your garden (or plant a garden if you don’t have one) that is bee friendly (even if it’s just one plant in one pot on a patio). Spring - lilacs, penstemon, lavender, sage, verbena, and wisteria. Summer – Mint, cosmos, squash, tomatoes, pumpkins, sunflowers, oregano, rosemary, poppies, black-eyed Susan, passion flower vine, honeysuckle. Fall – Fuschia, mint, bush sunflower, sage, verbena, toadflax. Take a picture of yourself wearing some sort of bee-attire doing your part to pollinate your newly planted plant. #63  -  265 POINTS  -  (Time-lapse up to 1 minute but preferably under 30 seconds.) Loo goes to space! A person named Loo won our NASA email contest last Fall, and Loo’s prize is out of this world. Write “Loo” on a paper airplane and launch it from the stratosphere (or higher). We must CLEARLY see you writing the name on the paper airplane and folding it, the paper airplane’s journey into space, and then the actual launch where the plane is released from the stratosphere from whatever vehicle has conveyed it to those heights (high-altitude weather balloons are an acceptable means of conveyance). Oh, and one more thing: the paper airplane must be decorated and must have a message on it about a secret, global conspiracy to make the world a better place. It should also have your team name written on it and the following email address: with the instructions: “If found please email picture of airplane and location found to: airgishwhes@gmail.com. #64  -  58 POINTS  -  Quilt a gishwhes onesie out of underwear and/or gloves. Strike a pose in the lobby of a financial institution or bank. Bonus points if it’s the floor of a stock exchange. #65  -  65 POINTS  -  You know SuperWhoLock? The amalgamation of Supernatural, Doctor Who and Sherlock? Well, that’s been done to death and everyone has moved on to the next big mashup. Let’s see 3D street art on a pavement or wall (in chalk!) that’s of a scene or setting from SuperWhoWatch (an amalgamation of Supernatural, Doctor Who and BayWatch) #66  -  18 POINTS  -  Personify your favorite movie title. Include a caption on your image of the title of the movie in quotes. - Tanya Best #67  -  43 POINTS  -  Banana Hammock. This year’s summer fashion elitists are all wearing the latest rage: Banana Bikini or Banana Briefs. Join them! #68  -  51 POINTS  -  You finally have a use for all the naked bananas you now have sitting around! Bake as much banana bread as you can with “gishwhes” spelled out in bananas on the top & distribute it to your local nursing home. #69  -  28 POINTS  -  You’ve been putting this off for far too long. Tell your parents something bad that you did as a child that they still don’t know about. Capture their reaction. This must not be staged. We have an Academy Award Winning Judge on staff that will determine if your parent has already heard this story and you will be docked points. - CJ and Lauren #70  -  39 POINTS  -  (Time-lapse down to 20 seconds.) Sidewalk cafes are all the rage, but most “sidewalk cafes” are total posers. Set up a “sidewalk cafe” the way it was meant to be - on an actual sidewalk. Cook a delicious omelet using just a magnifying glass, a hot sidewalk, and the sun. Share your feast with a friend! #71  -  45 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Rapper B. o. B. seems to think that the world is flat. Perform a highly scientific experiment that proves that it is not and tweet the results to him ( https://twitter.com/bobatl). Submit the image or video you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. #72  -  111 POINTS  -  I hate to say it, but this financial company is underwater. Let’s see the board meeting— with professionally dressed people at the table with chairs, paper, pens etc… all fully submerged at the bottom of a swimming pool. #73  -  39 POINTS  -  Visit a local laundromat. Place decorated envelopes with enough money (in coins or bills, depending on the machines) for one load of washing and one load of drying on at least one machine with the note: “We swim together, we tumble together. Love, Gishwhes.” #74  -  43 POINTS  -  Modify a grocery store shopping cart to be space-worthy. Put an alien being in the pilot’s seat and help them navigate the terrain of the “Earth produce” department to collect specimens. #75  -  16 POINTS  -  They told me I couldn’t, so I did. Pose in front of a sign declaring a rule. Break that rule. A few notes: It must be safe (what you are doing), and it MUST NOT be a law or illegal where you are. It must only be a “rule”. For example, you might find a sign that says, “collared shirts only.” You would pose in front of that sign wearing a tank top. - Inspired by Emily Shulman #76  -  39 POINTS  -  Have a caveperson demonstrate glass-blowing. - Jennifer Pierce #77  -  24 POINTS  -  Personify or embody your team name. Caption your image with your team name. - Shannon #78  -  48 POINTS  -  Being in the hospital can be scary and lonely for kids! Visit your local hospital to play a two-player video game with a pediatric patient. Be sure to dress thematically to match your game(s)! Take a picture of yourself in front of the children’s hospital. Do not take pictures with the kids unless they approve, their guardian(s) approve, and the hospital approves; we don’t want them to feel exploited. However, you MUST play with a child to get points for this item. This will be an honor system. You will have very bad karma if you cheat on this one. - Kristin Lindsay - Child’s Play charity. #79  -  29 POINTS  -  (Up to 20 seconds.) Why would you move from the couch during a Supernatural binge watching session? Build a complex SPN-themed Rube-Goldberg machine to fill your empty glass, catapult you a snack, or to serve some other couch potato need. - Diane-Audrey Carlier #80  -  73 POINTS  -  You’ve all seen “dog shaming memes” on the Internets. You know that crowd that lines up at the plaza of The Today Show and shows up on air? Let’s take it over with gisher-self-shaming signs. Hold up a large, colorful sign that details something you did that you probably shouldn’t have done (for example, “I drank milk straight of the carton and put it back in the fridge without telling my roommates”). Make it a light-hearted trivial violation, not a deep-seated personality flaw, actual violation of the law, or other serious offense. Share with us a clip of the AIRED FOOTAGE that shows your team’s sign and in the comments section of the item submitter, let us know which sign was yours. Do not add your team name or “gishwhes” anywhere on the sign… we want this to be a mystery. #81  -  25 POINTS  -  Sometimes it feels like your boss expects you to be in more than one place at more than one time, but you’re a gisher so you know how to deliver. Using the panoramic photo function on your phone, insert yourself at least three times in the same picture in different positions and/or wardrobe to show yourself as you “multitask”. You may NOT Photoshop yourself into the image. (Hint: you have to run around the person taking the picture each time they pass you in the frame.) #82  -  19 POINTS  -  In honour of Canada's 150th birthday, even though you may not be Canadian, you and a friend should clearly cover yourself in maple syrup and go roll in some maple leaves. - Jessica G. #83  -  29 POINTS  -  Lets see your interpretation of fireworks using vegetables and spaghetti as mixed media. - Saty381 #84  -  52 POINTS  -  (Two Images side-by-side.) The first image is a photo of an illustrated page from a children’s book. The second image is your reenactment of that illustration in 3 dimensions. - Inspired by Sarah Trumbley #85  -  47 POINTS  -  Let’s see LABSWHES. The Largest Awesome Balloon Sculpture the World Has Ever Seen. The themes this year are “insect” or “space”—or both. You must be in the middle of this structure. #86  -  39 POINTS  -  Everyone thinks unicorns are beautiful, magical, gentle creatures. You know better. Prove it to the world! You may use any media you like, including Photoshop. - Traci Akierman #87  -  41 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Tweet a picture of you or your child dressed as a bear in school to @betsydevos with whatever text you like and “#KeepSchoolsSafeFromBears #Gishwhes”. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. - Diedra Lookingbill #88  -  60 POINTS  -  Three words: 10 Mannequin-pin Bowling. - Ariana Preis #89  -  43 POINTS  -  Apply lipstick while jumping on a trampoline. - Emily Schulman #90  -  42 POINTS  -  “Why did the chicken cross the road?” There’s no better crossing guard than a mother hen! Dressed as a chicken, offer to help people cross a busy street. #91  -  31 POINTS  -  Leave a Yelp review of gishwhes after you deliver food to the homeless or to a homeless shelter. #92  -  62 POINTS  -  (Up to 20 seconds.) It’s nice to see a serious sport finally get the recognition it deserves: http://www.euronews.com/2017/04/30/finns-compete-in-annual-hobby-horse-championship. Now, let's see video documentation of "Human NASCAR" complete with the speeding, lane changes, a pit-stop, crashes, etc. You & at least 5 friends must be drivers of "vehicles" of your own design, complete with corporate sponsorship logos. All vehicles must be motor-free and foot-propelled (ala-Flintstones) and all engine sounds must be vocalized by you and your friends. Just to be clear... this is Human NASCAR, not roller derby. All vehicles must be propelled on foot. #93  -  72 POINTS  -  Get an elected official’s signature on a statement (written on official letterhead paper) declaring gishwhes an act of lawful resistance or civil disobedience. (Inspired by U of C Scav, 1987) #94  -  44 POINTS  -  Camouflage yourself in a pet store. #95  -  58 POINTS  -  (Up to 30 seconds.) The Silicon Gourmet has been teaching a neural network to generate recipes. Learning to cook is hard (as my son can attest)! In the interest of encouraging budding AI chefs everywhere, create a Food Network-worthy video preparing one of the recipes as described in the network’s cookbook. Make sure to sample the results on camera. Oh, and you must look and behave as if you were a droid, of course. #96  -  38 POINTS  -  (Try to take a very close-up photo - a.k.a. “Macro” photo.) Nice grill! Combine the “tiny food” trend with urban fashion. Show someone cooking tiny hamburgers & hot dogs on a friend’s “grill” (the dental kind.) #97  -  61 POINTS  -  Do something fitting in front of the Gereja Ayam (the abandoned Chicken Church of Indonesia). For example, you could play a game of Duck, Duck, Chicken! Or you could ponder the question: Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Or you could host an easter egg hunt… You get the picture. #98  -  38 POINTS  -  A marionette show featuring a puppet of Trump being controlled by a Putin lookalike. Quintuple BONUS POINTS if Putin himself is the puppeteer. #99  -  47 POINTS  -  Letterboxing (http://www.letterboxing.org/) is a game where people hide small weatherproof boxes in publicly accessible spaces with a logbook & a stamp. They share the clues to find their box on the web or via word of mouth. Create a letterbox for your team & share clues so other teams can find it over social media. Leave a logbook with your team stamp on it in the box. Then, find another teams’ box and leave them a message of encouragement along with your team’s stamp in their log book. Submit proof that you found at least one other team’s book & the message you wrote. NO COLLUSION! (And that goes for you, too, Donald.)  NOTE: Please either pickup your boxes after the Hunt ends or dedicate yourselves to maintaining them post-hunt. #100  -  38 POINTS  -  Calliope. Clio. Euterpe. Erato. Melpomene. Polyhymnia. Terpischore. Thalia. Urania. Inspirational goddesses of literature, the arts and science in Greek mythology. On the steps of the National Gallery in Trafalgar Square, provide a visual representation of the muse that guides you in your art and/or life. #101  -  80 POINTS  -  As I'm sure you’ve seen, over the years we have marketed gishwhes relentlessly and shamelessly (because we really want everyone to do it). This is the last gishwhes, so now it’s your turn to go ahead and show us how we should’ve marketed it. Create a gishwhes ad that no one would be able to resist. Note: you may make false or misleading claims if you so choose, but because we’re curious, you could even take a stab at a legit one. … #102  -  74 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! During the First Annual and Last Ever 2017 gishwhes Tea Party, we identified gishers based on their right-brush or left-brush toothbrushing statuses. Conduct a massive poll on your social networks for the gishwhes Institute of Vital Statistics to prove conclusively whether people brush their teeth starting on the same side of their mouth as their dominant hand or the opposite side. Because this is solid science, your sample size must have a minimum of 400 respondents. Submit a visually-compelling graph of your poll data and the number of votes and the winner. Use the hashtag #gishwhesteeth. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. #103  -  26 POINTS  -  Play hopscotch at one of the marker sites of Víddaflakk. (BONUS: Play Interdimensional Hopscotch.) #104  -  90 POINTS  -  A far-right Republican senator and a far-left Democrat Senator (or two similarly “diametrically party-opposed” legislative makers in your country) co-wearing a very large (fits two people) “This is Our ‘Get-Along’ Shirt.” Caption the image with the names of the politicians. #105  -  81 POINTS  -  We know a little girl that makes a different kind of Advent Calendar. As she marks off each day on the calendar, she gives something away. Make your own version of a reverse Advent calendar. On the first day of gishwhes, create a decorated Advent calendar whereby, for each day on the calendar, you depict something you’re going to give away. Then, each day of the Hunt, take a picture of you fulfilling your calendar item. Submit 7 pictures in a grid (or a video slideshow) showing what you’ve done. Then, continue on through the calendar period. (Yes, this will continue after the Hunt is over, but though gishwhes as we know it may be ending, its spirit will live on in you!) -Keegan Connor Tracy’s 10-year old daughter #106  -  79 POINTS  -  The Lumbasumba region is being protected this year by Gishwhes. We gishers managed to purchase for permanent preservation more than 60 square miles of the Lumbasumba forest during the final weeks of registration in July! But the Lumbasumba area is more than just a forest. It’s also the hottest new dance craze. Show us how it’s done. (As all gishers know, you need to do it next to a REAL monkey, a parrot, or a camel to do it right.) #107  -  92 POINTS  -  (Up to 45 seconds.) Let’s virtually graffiti the world with kindness! Using a GPS tracking app (like Figure Running or similar), walk, jog, or run as large a path as you can to spell out a message of love, hope, or kindness. As you go, stop and perform acts of kindness and document them. You must show us the map with coordinates at the end of your path as well as the minimum of 3 documented act of kindness. - Inspired by Tia Pogue #108  -  28 POINTS  -  The chickens have come home to Proust. #109  -  71 POINTS  -  (Up to 22 seconds.) Wonder Woman being “Superman-splained” to. #110  -  29 POINTS  -  The return of the Three-ingredient Challenge! Show us: Triptych, Transylvanian, takin. #111  -  45 POINTS  -  A street vendor handing out toilet paper roses at the toilet fountain in Foshan, China. #112  -  83 POINTS  -  A ballet troupe in tutus, engaged in a bar brawl - freeze framed at its most climactic moment. #113  -  62 POINTS  -  Set up a Maximum Security Birdhouse in a beautiful public park. #114  -  41 POINTS  -  Let’s see a TripAdvisor or Airbnb review of your mother’s womb as an “extended stay hotel”. Keep it suitable for work and any child’s prying eyes! #115  -  83 POINTS  -  Make A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of Le Grande Jatte by Seraut into an elaborate dot-to-dot image. #116  -  65 POINTS  -  Not many people know this, but the Kessel Run was actually a foot race. Let’s see at least 5 Star Wars characters competing in the Kessel Run in a shopping mall. #117  -  65 POINTS  -  Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole. Let’s see Dean Winchester driving a pedi-cab or quadricycle with Castiel & Sam as passengers. #118  -  60 POINTS  -  Rumor has it that Amazon is teaming up with the Vatican for a bold new service: On Demand Drone Deliverance services. Show us a drone administering a wedding service, confession, last rites, communion or baptism. #119  -  22 POINTS  -  Trump l’oeil. (This is not a typo.) #120  -  91 POINTS  -  You’ve heard of a soap box derby, but the sofa bed derby is where it’s at. Let’s see two “race car” sofa beds, each with pajama-clad “drivers”, racing down an actual street. Be safe and complete this where there is absolutely no traffic! #121  -  32 POINTS  -  The people of Iceland believe in Huldufólk, which are invisible elves. They build tiny houses and churches for them. But the Huldufólk deserve to have a nightlife, too! Let’s see a tiny Huldufólk nightclub in a busy urban area. #122  -  40 POINTS  -  They say a rolling stone gathers no moss, but can moss gather a Rolling Stone? Make a portrait of one of The Rolling Stones out of moss. #123  -  38 POINTS  -  As all gishers know, Saturday, August 12 is “Meet Another Gisher Day.” Meet up in front of the largest art museum in your town at 10:00 AM (of whatever timezone you’re in). It’s a pot-luck coleslaw brunch this year, so bring your favorite family recipe of coleslaw… and as much sidewalk chalk as you can. After brunch, decorate the pavement with a collaborative message to the world. In order for a meet-up to count you need to have representatives of at least 5 teams present, so this will require some organizing. Gishwhes is all about coming together, so teams may collaborate (gasp!) on this one, but your team’s image or video must still be all your own. #124  -  21 POINTS  -  Be someone’s “rock” to get them through the hard times. Hand-paint small rocks with a message of kindness & leave them in areas that need a pick-me-up. (On the underside, please write “Pass it on.”) You must paint & hide at least one rock for each member of your team. #125  -  41 POINTS  -  (Time-lapse under 20 seconds.) All good things must come to an end, and so it is with the Hunt. Create a “sand” mandala featuring images that symbolize the hunt to you… all using pixie sticks as your chakpur and sand. When it’s done, show us your masterwork and then, just like the Buddhist monks, sweep it away and get ready for what’s next. #126  -  88 POINTS  -  Reward! I won’t say that Jensen & Jared are missing their balls, but they were last seen being sent into this quarry at Britannia Beach. Find them, take a photo, and put them back exactly where you found them for other teams to find. If you keep them, you will lose valuable karma & points. Edit to add:  Apparently Item # 126, the one in which you are charged with finding Jared and Jensen’s golf balls is not going well. Now, granted, these are jared and jensen’s balls, so one would expect them to be quite hard to find. But it seems their balls are leaving a tremendous number of people unsatisfied as well. (To make matters worse, the owners of the quarry in BC have also installed a “no trespassing” sign since the hunt started and several bears have been spotted there by gishers as well.) So… I’m suspending this item. However, there will be a replacement item soon wherein you will be seeking out my golf balls, (which have never left an unsatisfied customer yet.) Also, if you have already completed item #126, you will be able to submit your photo of Jared and Jensen’s ball(s) for the new item and get full credit. The new item will be assigned the same number of points. #127  -  64 POINTS  -  These Kung-Fu Nuns (dare we say “Nunjas?”) are biking through the Himalayas to stop human trafficking. (No, really.) In their honor, let’s see some tricks on a BMX bike. Rider must be dressed in a nun’s habit. #128  -  84 POINTS  -  Get a Porcupanda or other gishwhes mascot included as an emoji on an official iPhone emoji list. #129  -  57 POINTS  -  IMAGE or VIDEO. Pope St. Francis set up a laundromat to help the homeless get access to clean clothes. Follow his lead by setting up a service station to benefit the homeless or impoverished in your area (a “take what you need” public pantry, toiletries cabinet, water station, public shower, public toilet, laundry facility, open library, etc.). #130  -  23 POINTS  -  A tactometer used to measure tact. #131  -  33 POINTS  -  Make a collage that features things only locals from your town would know about. Display it prominently in a public space in your town. #132  -  79 POINTS  -  Couch Surfing 2: The Revenge. Last year, in our infinite wisdom, we suggested “couch surfing: real surfing, real couch.” We quickly came to our senses and pulled the item for safety reasons, but it’s been a year and we don’t hold onto the past. Couch surfing: Let��s see it in the real surf with a BUOYANT (e.g.,inflatable) couch. You may not use a real couch as it’s too dangerous and bad for the ecosystem. Make it happen. (You may not leave any couches in any body of water and you must be super safe with this. If waves are too big, do not do it.) #133  -  42 POINTS  -  Waste not, want not. Save every piece of non-biodegradable refuse that you would have normally thrown away from Days 1-5 of the Hunt and on day 6, use this material to create a sculpture of an endangered animal. #134  -  21 POINTS  -  My wife is so trend-forward, she recently took a “goat yoga class” (it’s real; you can google it.) Without hurting, upsetting, or endangering ANY animal, show us the next trend in animal-infused yoga that she should get on board with. #135  -  40 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! (Up to 30 seconds.) Freeze frame on a picture of you (like they do at the end of movies) and then roll a credit sequence for your own life. Include a "here’s what happens to you in the future" sentence or two and then a listing of the people that have helped you get where you are now or where you are going and what their “titles” are. Post this on the social media channel of your choice with the hashtags #gishwhes #mylife. Submit the video, and in the comment field provide the link to the post. #136  -  29 POINTS  -  Often misunderstood and rarely properly pronounced, chupacabras just need a good home. Adopt one and show us your favorite bonding moment. #137  -  51 POINTS  -  Take an elderly person (at least 70 years old) on a joyride in their favorite car (same make and model and vintage) from their youth. The elderly person must be at least 70 years old; the car, at least 60 years old... and you and the senior must be dressed in period attire that reflects the era when the car was manufactured. #138  -  52 POINTS  -  Prejudice is something we can easily see and call out in others. However, we all have biases and prejudices of our own that we are often blind to. You’re going to have to dig deep here - but you’re a gisher, so we know you can do it. Show us you taking a step to overcome one of your own prejudices. #139  -  61 POINTS  -  Each member of your team must knit or crochet one piece of a quilted throw that, when combined, showcases your team emblem or symbol. #140  -  51 POINTS  -  Everyone talks about drum circles, but they grossly underestimate the power of other shapes. Create a complex shape with as many sides, angles or curves as you can, and demonstrate the power of percussion geometry - with as many drummers as you can drum up. #141  -  42 POINTS  -  At least 8 people walking in twos, on the Tiger & Turtle in Duisburg, Germany as if it were an actual roller coaster. They must keep their hands up as they walk the track, except for one of the front “riders” who is clenching an invisible lap bar, terrified. It’s okay to be nauseous. #142  -  80 POINTS  -  As all gishers know, a Gish Gallop can only be performed by a Fortune 2000 CEO in the lobby of his company’s headquarters on a hobby horse or a live pony. Caption your video with the name of the company and CEO that we are watching as they Gish Gallop. #143  -  41 POINTS  -  Sure, most Stormtroopers toed the line, but back in the 1960s there were a few draft-dodging peacenik Stormtroopers. Find a famous vintage photo of a peace sit-in or Woodstock-level love-in and flawlessly photoshop in one or more Stormtroopers. We must think it’s the real thing. As an alternative, you can stage your own “peace” picture and submit an “aged” stormtrooper sit-in image. YES, YOU MAY PHOTOSHOP THIS ITEM! #144  -  37 POINTS  -  (Up to 30 seconds.) An impromptu concert consisting of a chocalho, an apito, a reco-reco, and a pandeiro. (Bonus points if you perform in front of, or in, the Teatro Amazonas.) Oh, and of course the musicians are playing Carry On my Wayward Son by @kansasband. #145  -  71 POINTS  -  Oversized board games are a trend, with oversized Jenga and such. Let’s see a game of tiddlywinks being played— scaled up to giant-sized. #146  -  40 POINTS  -  Two nice suburban monster moms out for a day of shopping at Hoxton’s Monster Supplies in England. #147  -  28 POINTS  -  Paint an extraordinary portrait of your favorite gishwhes mascot with the brand “D2N” (with the 2 backwards) on the Werregarenstraat. #148  -  38 POINTS  -  Dress up as a superhero and perform acts of “kindness” heroism at Hősök tere (Hero's Square). #149  -  71 POINTS  -  (Time-lapse up to 25 seconds.) Canada's Prime Minister Justin Trudeau gets a lot of attention for being super hot. Frankly, it's starting to detract from his ability to govern. Cool things down by making a sculpture of Trudeau out of Canada's most ample resource: ice. A couple of caveats: the frozen water you use must have something added to it to make it opaque, and inside the ice must be something emblematic of canada that doesn’t melt (for example, a hockey skate). The timelapse must be of the sculpture melting revealing the object hidden inside. Make sure to frame your shot with a fitting or neutral background so that the final product really pops. #150  -  33 POINTS  -  Ireland has the lowest reports of UFO sightings in Europe each year. Something must be done about this! Make and display a convincing UFO in a public place in Ireland to increase the number. #151  -  54 POINTS  -  Visit Cat Island (Tashirojima, Japan) dressed as a dog. You must have at least 10 cats in the photo. #152  -  42 POINTS  -  Decorate the exterior of your home like the Pan House, using whatever object speaks to you. #153  -  72 POINTS  -  Not to be quixotic, but wind power and automation are the future of personal grooming. Create a wind-powered device to automate a self-care process. Could be a wind-powered shoe shining machine, a wind-powered, toothbrush, etc. (It must actually work and must actually be powered by wind.) #154  -  33 POINTS  -  There’s a UFO Observation Deck (redmonkeygroup.com) in Slovakia. On Sunday, August 6 at 3 PM Slovakian time, grab your friends and dress up as your interpretation of extraterrestrials and go there. Bring luggage and queue up outside of it as though you're boarding to go back home (you don’t have to enter). #155  -  40 POINTS  -  Over the years, we’ve had menstrual-hygiene supply sculptures of everything from dinosaurs to seagulls to puppies. We’ve also gotten a lot of flak for encouraging waste, and in protest gishers have donated thousands of menstrual pads to shelters, (which actually proves that in fact we at gishwhes can do no wrong). This final year’s list wouldn’t be complete without a menstrual-hygiene sculpture, so we’re ending this by splitting the difference: Create a tiny, perfectly sculpted statue of Michelangelo’s David or another famous historic sculpture of your choosing out of a SINGLE tampon, and then donate at least 1 box of menstrual hygiene supplies to your local shelter. Submit the image of your sculpture. The donation will be on the honor system. Remember, KARMA is a bitch. #156  -  71 POINTS  -  Sure, Misha & HRH Queen Elizabeth II had a rocky year in 2016 with their “Brexit Breakup”, but despite a brief conscious uncoupling, theirs is a love that stands the test of time. Prove it by showing us Egyptian hieroglyphics, Greek urns, or other recently-unearthed archaeological finds that prove theirs is a love that has lasted through the ages. If you’re choosing to do a hieroglyphic, you may NOT permanently deface any stone - use chalk! #157  -  38 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! NASA is soliciting tweets to send to Voyager 1. Tweet your suggestion with #gishwhes. I suggest it be the following theme: Voyager 1 ran to the store and you are texting to remind it to pick something up at the store. But we will permit messages of any type so let your imaginations run wild. Submit a screenshot of your post. Provide a link to the tweet in the comment field of the submit page. #158  -  22 POINTS  -  Thanks to “reactions” we can now communicate our feelings more clearly to one another! But Facebook limits us to just 6 reactions and we at gishwhes HQ believe that this limitation constraints our ability to express nuanced emotions to one another. Let’s see an updated version of the Facebook “reactions” with feelings like “silently judging you”, “reacting positively to your face but planning to gossip about this later”, and “I’m just not sure how to feel about this” and other more subtle emotions. You may photoshop this item. #159  -  47 POINTS  -  Who said you couldn't Hunt while in hospital? Certainly not any of us! Show off your large-scale cartoon skills by writing the longest poem (or drawing the largest mural) you can, all about the adventures of a virus caught in a hospital, on a scroll made from a roll of exam table paper. #160  -  41 POINTS  -  As you all know, my grandmother lives at Roland Park Place in Baltimore, MD. It’s a senior assisted-living home. She’s been hesitant to have the shenanigans of gishwhes descend, so let’s legitimize that fear... from Tuesday to Thursday 10AM to 4PM ONLY PLEASE! (DON’T SHOW UP AT ANY OTHER TIME OR IT WILL BE AN INCONVENIENCE TO THE GUESTS AT THE HOME and you will be docked points!) Let’s invade Roland Park Place literally! Show up dressed as an extraterrestrial on an interplanetary goodwill mission. Bring an offering of your home planet’s favorite treats or creature comforts (games, large print books, slippers, slip-proof socks, soft blankets, etc) and specimens of natural beauty from this planet (humans like that). You will get 25% bonus points if you perform this item at Roland Park Place (that’s the added value of nepotism), but you can get full credit if you perform this item at any retirement home/assisted living facility. #161  -  87 POINTS  -  David LaChapelle is a renowned experimental photographer known for his kitsch-pop surrealist style. Recreate a well-known painting as a photograph in the style of David LaChappelle. Somewhere in your image there must be a banana, and you may not depict The Last Supper. (2X Bonus: get Dave Chappelle to star in your David LaChapelle homage.) #162  -  33 POINTS  -  Lube luge. That's it. That's the item. #163  -  60 POINTS  -  This Hunt’s must-have fashion trend: an aquarium hat with live fish. The aquarium hat must not endanger the live fish in any way. #164  -  62 POINTS  -  Get a bonafide zillow listing for property on Mars. #165  -  28 POINTS  -  https://twitter.com/zenxv/status/845474882607632384 #166  -  38 POINTS  -  (Time-lapse up to 30 seconds.) Follow a tomato back in time from the local co-op to where the farmer grew it. Thank them for their service by sharing a sandwich with them… one that has slices of that tomato in it. #167  -  29 POINTS  -  (Time-lapse up to 20 seconds.) There are two things that science has proven unequivocally: 1) global warming is happening and 2) sucking the melting ice cream from a tiny hole in the bottom of a sugar cone is the greatest possible pleasure in life. (Minimum 5 rounded scoops on top and you must suck all the ice cream through the tiny hole.) #168  -  66 POINTS  -  When the apocalypse comes and the power goes out you are going to be sorry you are so digitally-dependent! Have your social media page printed on microfiche… just in case. #169  -  27 POINTS  -  Write "Ass butt" (in non-toxic kids finger paint or chalk!) on the hindquarters of an Ass. Edit to add: (This should go without saying, but be careful & safe. Approach from the side, never stand directly behind it, and try to keep the donkey happy so you don't get injured.) #170  -  88 POINTS  -  Angels may be all-powerful, but they’re luddites (technologically behind the times) and it affects their productivity in the office. Let’s see an angel writing something on an old-school mechanical typewriter (not electric) featuring a working Enochian keyboard. (The keys and keystrokes must correspond to actual Enochian typeface.) #171  -  41 POINTS  -  A stump grinder with a unicorn decal, being pushed by a child no more than 7 years old wearing a pink princess costume. (Edited because Misha is not much into stump-grinding and thought a stump grinder was something else.) EDIT NO. 2 Machine should not be operational during photo op #172  -  32 POINTS  -  Now that this may be the last gishwhes-as-we-know-it ever, it’s time to reflect on missed opportunities. Let’s see the Item List Misha SHOULD have made all these years. Give us your team’s ideal gishwhes Item List with a minimum of 10 Items. If the majority of the items you create look like no thought was put into them (and you were just quickly writing down items to get the points), you will receive zero points. #173  -  55 POINTS  -  Complete one of the more challenging items on your team’s homemade gishwhes Item List. #174  -  33 POINTS  -  An Airbnb listing for the gishbus. #175  -  36 POINTS  -  Everyone knows “high noon” means “high tea”. Bring a little bit of civilization to the frontier with Wild West teacup and saucer holsters. #176  -  33 POINTS  -  For our gish cousins in the antipodes where the days are short and the nights are cold: Establish a “TLC” station under the iconic clocks at Flinders Street Station in Melbourne or on the steps of the Opera House in Sydney, and provide a little warmth – be it a coffee, a heat pack, or simply a smile – for those making their journey to work on the cold winter mornings. #177  -  44 POINTS  -  A Scottish terrier in a Scottish kilt eating a scotch egg in front of an Irish monument. #178  -  54 POINTS  -  The Prague Astronomical Clock – or Prague orloj – is the third oldest astronomical clock in the world, and the oldest one still operating. But imagine if this feat of mechanical engineering did more than mark the passage of time... Imagine it could actually take you back in time! Gather your teammates, friends, and family members together and show us the time period you would travel back to if this historic clock warped the time continuum. Note: You and your time-travelling companions must be pictured in front of the clock. #179  -  36 POINTS  -  (Up to 45 seconds edited.) Share an audio dream diary of your first thoughts as you wake up every morning of the Hunt (so you cannot submit this until the last day of the Hunt!). It must be the first thing you do before you get out of bed. #180  -  111 POINTS  -  (Up to 30 seconds.) Cinema has evolved, but some actors don’t. Let’s see a silent film actress against a 1920’s style black-and-white-set. The actor/actress must have exaggerated facial expressions and the score must be nickelodeon-style piano music. Suddenly, the music changes… It's hip hop and modern technology comes in with color and sync sound, but she's still black and white and still mouthing words with title card. #181  -  87 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Let’s see a (SFW) 2,000 word essay published on twitter in 140 character bursts. (no attachments, etc.) about the best way to get pregnant for the 10th time. (I’m sorry, but I promised someone this would be an item.) Submit an image of the first post and then a link to this post in the COMMENT field of the submit page so we can check to make sure you “published” the whole thing. #182  -  53 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Seamlessly modify using photoshop (or other digital altering software), a well-know oil painting by adding in an anachronistic element. For example, if it were a Monet, you might put one of the ladies under a parasol holding an ipad. YES, YOU MAY DIGITALLY ALTER THE IMAGE YOU ARE SUBMITTING… with a catch. The anachronistic element must be rendered seamlessly into the image in the style of the original painter or creator. It must look like a part of the original composition; we should not be able to tell it was added in later. Post the image on FB and/or Pinterest. Submit the image you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post in the comment field of the submit page. #gishwhesModernMasterpiece #183  -  53 POINTS  -  You are all soon going to be a part of a sinister plot to take over the world… in a unique way. But we need your help. Here’s the first thing you have to do: Decide what your favorite point of interest, historical site or national landmark is in your town or city and enter its address here: http://qrickit.com/qrickit_apps/qrickit_qrcode_creator_geo.php . Below the map on that webpage you’ll see an “optional text” field. Enter “Taken by CFG”. Then click “Qcreate” at the bottom. Download the QR code and submit it as your item. Stay tuned for what comes next... #184  -  92 POINTS  -  (Up to 30 seconds if video.) Last year, we helped people around the world get access to clean water. But it's been a year and the problem certainly hasn't gone away. In fact, as global temperatures rise, the problem is only going to intensify. Work with your team to create a realistic (not a joke or parody) schematic or prototype of an easy-to-set up portable personal AWG (atmospheric water generator) system that could be used anywhere in the world. It must be cheap to build (aim for less than $10) with parts that can be found in any hardware store. It must be compact & light enough for a nomadic or homeless individual to carry around. Ideally, it would collect enough water in a day to sustain someone for that day. #185  -  48 POINTS  -  Hug a national forest! Grab as many friends as you can and go to your favorite national forest or park and be tree huggers. Set the camera up so we can see all the tree hugging action clearly. #186  -  46 POINTS  -  One of the biggest problems astronauts will face when they travel to Mars will be figuring out how to bring enough food for the three year journey. Porcupanda has offered the idea of making their spacecraft out of food. Show them how. Build an edible spacecraft using anything except “space ice cream” (Per our resident Director of Intergalactic Space Exploration, that stuff tastes like strawberry Styrofoam: “Bleecht!” as he so eloquently put it.) #187  -  51 POINTS  -  Every year, the scientists at the NASA Jet Propulsion Lab make spectacular pumpkin carvings that put our humble Halloween jack-o-lanterns to shame (see https://www.wired.com/2016/10/watch-nasas-high-tech-pumpkins-action/). Whatever. What’s a rocket scientist got that you don’t have? Let’s see you out-do them! Show us your best and most outlandish WATERMELON-O-LANTERN carving. - Dave Lavery #188  -  28 POINTS  -  For many years, military aircraft sported spectacular “nose art”— artistic homages to people, places, and ideas important to the aircraft crew. As aesthetically appealing as aircraft nose art may have been, we think they botched it on the choice of canvas. Show us your best nose art - but this time, get it right! All art must be on, around, or incorporate, your nose. #189  -  32 POINTS  -  The World’s Worst Lawyer. #190  -  51 POINTS  -  Oranges are the new black! Let’s see your most a-peeling cocktail dress all made out of - you guessed it - orange peels. Pose in a crowded urban bar. #191  -  72 POINTS  -  (Up to 30 seconds time-lapsed and/or edited.) You didn’t think we were going to let all those oranges go to waste, did you? Wall Drugs has signs announcing Wall Drugs locations hundreds of miles before you get to the store, so drivers get to anticipate the goodness coming. Place signs along 5 miles of road leading up to an orange juice stand that speaks hyperbolically of the life-changing rejuvenation of the coming refreshment with a countdown of the miles. You must have a sign at least every quarter of a mile along the path. If this is insurmountable to you, at the very least, host a freshly-squeezed orange juice party in your backyard for all of your neighbors. You won’t get points for that, but you’ll use the juice and make some friends. #192  -  47 POINTS  -  (Time lapse up to 25 seconds). In our busy world, people sometimes forget to slow down and see the beauty around them. Perform a task at work extremely slowly while everyone around you carries on at normal speed. When this is played back in in time lapse, you’re performing at normal speed and it’s the world around you that’s going too fast. #193  -  10 POINTS  -  The Reimann hypothesis of mathematics includes the Reimann zeta function, which categorizes some zeros as “non-trivial zeros" and others as "trivial zeros." We think this unequal treatment of zeros, which are clearly all equal, is just wrong! Hold a protest in front of a university mathematics or computer science building with a sign that says something to the effect of"ALL ZEROS ARE EQUAL" or "NO ZEROS ARE TRIVIAL!" #194  -  67 POINTS  -  Do you spend too much time indoors while you GISH? It’s time to get outside! Dust off your bicycle, grab a friend or two and go out and ride a 50-mile bike ride (this can be done over the entire period of the Hunt and may be done either on a long road trip somewhere or in different round trip legs to and from your house)! You must track your progress on a GPS drawing app. (Bonus points if you draw a picture of a gishwhes mascot with your path.) Oh, by the way - you need to be wearing part of a pineapple or banana (in some fashion) while you ride. Submit an image of your GPS drawing. Yes, it would be easy to cheat on this item, but let’s all take the high road and practice honesty on this one. #195  -  235 POINTS  -  (This video can be as long as it takes to do the job, but we hope the job goes quickly and it is gobbled up fast so the video is short!) Using a steel shredder, shred a decommissioned bus. It must be a full sized bus with at least 10 rows. It may be a school bus or a municipal bus. It may not be a VW MiniBus; it must have been built to seat at least 30. Paint a message that conveys the fact that gishwhes recycled becomes CFG (we’ll explain later). For example, you could write: “Recycled gishwhes = CFG" in large font the side of the bus. Feel free to word this differently, but convey that message. The bigger the bus the better. Oh and paint the windows of the bus to show it’s passengers. (Obviously no living being is in the bus.) Although you should upload a video as your submission, be sure to take pictures of the event in case we need those for the coffee table book (we’ll email you for them). #196  -  62 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! THIS IS A TOP SECRET ITEM! DO NOT SHARE ITS CONTENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA UNTIL DIRECTED OR YOU WILL RUIN THE SURPRISE AND BE DELUGED WITH BAD KARMA. By now, most of you may know our friend Giles Duley. If not, watch the video at the top of this page. Then, watch here to see what he did with us recently: https://youtu.be/-tOt9LfZF9w ...and he’s doing something amazing with us again with us this year (which we’ll be announcing VERY soon). Giles inspires us and we want to thank him for all of his hard (and often thankless) work. So, we’re going to thank him... BUT WE’RE GOING TO SURPRISE HIM! SO PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT POST ABOUT THIS UNTIL THE DESIGNATED TIME: On Friday, August 11th, at EXACTLY 9am PDT, we are going to give him a “thunderclap” of thanks on the Internet. Because Giles thinks EVERYONE can make a difference no matter their circumstances (and he’s a living embodiment of that), we’re going to prove it. Here’s your job: before the 11th, go out and do an act of kindness. But not just any act of kindness... Giles works hard to help refugee families and landmine victims, so your act of kindness should focus on expanding his work exponentially through the power of gishwhes and gishers. Do something that makes a meaningful, material difference in the life of either a refugee or someone who has been directly impacted by war. If you’re at a loss of how to do this, here are some suggestions: bring a care package to new refugees in your neighborhood, go to a refugee center and volunteer, bring a warm meal to a homeless veteran on the streets, volunteer at a soup kitchen where you know there are war veterans, make a donation to an organization that helps with reconstructive surgery and prosthetics for war victims, or sponsor a child made homeless by the war with a one-time or recurring donation. If you can’t manage to find or coordinate any of the above (but please try!), simply carry out a random act of kindness for another human being on the planet who could legitimately use some kindness. Dig deep on this one, guys. The goal is to cause a ripple effect from the work Giles is doing and expand it worldwide. Let's do this. Capture an image or video of this act. At 9am PDT on Friday, August 11th, post the image or video on Facebook with a detailed description of what you did and crosspost to Twitter. Be sure to mention Giles in the post. (For Facebook, tag @GilesDuleyPhotography and on Twitter, tag @gilesduley with #thanksGiles as the hashtag.) Submit the image or video you take on our site, but provide the link to your social media post link in the comment field of the submit page. #197  -  24 POINTS  -  Play a few bars of a well-known tune on a well-known musical instrument—but not in the well-known manner. Play a cello tucked under your chin, a saxophone with mallets, or piano as a string instrument with a bow, that sort of thing. The more unexpected the utilization, the more points. -David Pogue #198  -  108 POINTS  -  CHANGE A LIFE! We will post the "Change A Life" item soon so you can submit... and change a life! CHANGE A LIFE. "It gives me hope. I feel special when I'm doing it. If something bad happens to me, all I have to do is dance..." -Timarandarin (14 years old)Last year gishwhes worked with the charity Random Acts and Giles Duley’s Legacy of War to forever change the lives of three refugee families by raising over $250,000 in just a few days. Anybody who has seen these families' smiles will know what an incredible impact we had working together. This year, we are teaming up with Random Acts and Legacy of War again to grant the last wish of a dying woman, and in doing so, we will save the dreams of hundreds of children who live in some of the world's poorest conditions. Fiona Sargeant, a former ballet dancer from England, founded and runs a ballet school in an impoverished township in South Africa that for years has provided ballet instruction, meals, education, safe refuge and ultimately hope for hundreds of children. She is not a doctor, nor running a large foundation or charity, but she does know how to dance and she wanted to give back to the world. She is the living proof that EVERYONE can make a difference, if their heart is behind what they’re doing. Sadly, Fiona has terminal cancer and only has weeks to live. Once she passes, she expects the school to be shut down. But there is a plan in motion that, if funded, would carry on her legacy. Let’s grant her dying wish and BY THE END OF THE HUNT let her know that her children will be taken care of long after she is gone. She has no idea we are going to do this! We are going to surprise her with this colossal random act of kindness at the end of the Hunt! We’ve created a Crowdrise page here that tells her story. DONATIONS ARE 100% TAX DEDUCTIBLE AND 100% OF THE DONATIONS GO TO THE SCHOOL (for countries other than U.S., deductions are contingent on your laws). The Gishwhes Item here: create a fundraising “page” for your team where family, friends and others can donate. Since this is Gishwhes and there’s always an extra twist with everything we do, here’s the deal: we also want you to get OTHERS to donate to your team’s crowdrise page. We know you don’t need “points” as an incentive to help these kids, but since it is part of the Hunt, we want to maximize the power of these points to help. Here’s your assignment: start a page and get at least 10 donations from people or businesses NOT on your team. You and your team members are welcome to donate to your campaign, but that is not a requirement for points— the Item requirement is to get at least 10 people to make a cumulative total of least 10 donations who are NOT on your team. There is no minimum amount to donate for GISHWHES purposes, but Crowdrise does require a minimum $10 donation be collected, and let’s all please encourage others to be generous above this so we can make a profound impact. SUBMIT a screenshot of your team’s page with a minimum of 10 donations on it. (To initially create a fundraising team, click the FUNDRAISE FOR THIS CAMPAIGN button.) #199  -  44 POINTS  -  Breaker, breaker! Tune in for details: CB Channel 27 (Frequency 27.27500) broadcasting near Lacy Park, San Marino, CA. Latitude: 34.1204167 Longitude: -118.1201348 DATE & TIME: 8/7 12 PM PDT or 8/9 9 AM PT CB CHANNEL 32 (Frequency 27.32500) broadcasting new Hermann Park Conservancy, Houston TX (Latitude: 29.7160286 Longitude: -95.3886413) DATE & TIME: 8/11 NOON CT #200  -  72 POINTS  -  THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! She should run! First, research upcoming local, state, and federal elections in your area. Second, nominate, via social media posts, qualified female citizens you think should run for specific elected offices in those upcoming elections based on their qualifications and/or passion. Make a post on any or all of your social media handles, tag them (so they see it!), and explain why you want them to run, using the hashtag #SheShouldRun. But your nomination post is not what you submit on our site! IF you manage to get a woman to publicly commit to running in the next election cycle this week via their social media, submit two images side-by-side: an image of your post “nominating” them to run, next to an screenshot of their social media post committing to run, and provide a link to their post in the comments field of the submit page. Note: Candidate must not have already announced their intent to run for office. We have assigned a special prosecutor to scour the internet for your candidate’s previous declarations of intent-to-run and will vet them. #201  -  61 points  -  For a good time call... (323) 645 0703 UPDATE: Outside US: 00-1-323-645-0703 Within US: (323) 645-0703 #202  -  46 points  -  A gisher wrote me recently stating, “I started gishwhes in 2015 myself and my children all joined in and had the best week of our lives, so much fun, so much love, so much laughter. In December 2015 I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer… But I didn't let it beat me. We signed up for gishwhes 2016 and made beautiful art together and performed many acts of kindness to those around us and in need, my children now 10 & 8 have those lessons in their hearts now, to spread kindness and love to all around them! Unfortunately I am too sick to participate this year, but hope to still be here to see all the wonderful creations everyone makes, and if I'm not still here when gishwhes starts I will be watching down on you all, cheering everyone on.” Obviously, I cried when I read that. We emailed her back, but haven’t heard back… So this one's for you, S. (and your kids), with love from me & everyone in the gishwhes family: Find a local hospital or cancer center and coordinate with them to deliver a comfort bag(s) to a patient. Fill a cheerfully decorated canvas or cloth bag with items to provide palliative relief and comfort to a cancer patient: soft eye masks, scarves, a soft blanket, socks, ginger tea or candy, unscented natural lip balm, sudoku or coloring books, puzzles, poems, etc. Include a note of support or encouragement if you wish. (Please don't say "get well soon.” Phrasing like, "we're sending you our love" is better.) Please do not take a picture with the recipient... Just the bag. We trust you to deliver. #203  -  See item details for points available  -  NEW COLLABORATION ITEM https://www.gishwhes.com/.../item-bearby-goes-to-washington/   THIS ITEM MUST BE POSTED ON SOCIAL MEDIA PRIOR TO THE END OF THE HUNT! Bearby Von Bearamucci has an interview for a position as White House Communications Director on Saturday, August 12th at 8pm ET sharp! He was all set to drive the Gishbus across the country, but its engine wouldn’t start and he has a terrible fear of flying. He’s counting on gishers to help get him from Redding, California to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington, DC before his appointment (by passenger car or truck only. NO PLANES, TRAINS, SHIPPING SERVICES, OR BUSES). Your instructions are here. Coordinate with other gishers to pick up Bearby and take him at least 5 miles, but no more than 100 miles, from your starting point. On your leg of the journey, post a pic of you, Bearby, and the gisher you’re handing him off to at a diner, rest stop, or point of interest (please geo-tag the location). Tag @gishwhes, the next gisher, and @BearbyVonB and use hashtag #GetTheBearThere. You MUST hand Bearby off to the next gisher to complete your Item or you get zero points. Submit your photo with Bearby to us and provide a link to your post in the comments field of the submit page. You will get 40 points if you take a picture with Bearby and a sign with your team name on it, or 60 points if you take a photo with Bearby and transport him (please include side-by-side image of the map points as well). If he makes it to his appointment at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in D.C. by 8 PM ET on August 12th, you will get an additional 50% in points (60 points for photo only, 90 points for photo + transportation). Yes, we know how convoluted this item is and that it seems destined for failure— but I believe you’ll spit in failure’s eye and say, “Not today!” Sidebar: gishwhes HQ nearly came to blows as we debated over whether providing maps and tools to help facilitate your journey was “helping” and therefore “cheating”, but after a rousing bout of coleslaw-wrestling, “Team Give Them Maps” claimed creamy victory, and so you may use these resources to help you coordinate the journey. IMPORTANT NOTES: 1. Members of the same team cannot collect multiple submissions for this item. 2. Make sure other teams get the chance to help Bearby! Yes, this means you can communicate and walk the line of “collaboration” in your hand-off attempts. 3. Individuals transporting Bearby must take him at least 5 miles or up to 100 miles in one trip. 4. You may NOT take him near your homes. We have a GPS locator on Bearby (due to past felonies) so we don’t want to compromise your home locations. 5. Do not exceed the speed limit by more than 5 miles per hour, because that’s what the cops are cool with, obviously. This isn’t Cannonball Run. Make it happen, gishers. Bearby is counting on you to help him land his dream job!  IMPORTANT NOTES: 1. Members of the same team cannot collect multiple submissions for this item. 2. Make sure other teams get the chance to help Bearby! Yes, this means you can communicate and walk the line of “collaboration” in your hand-off attempts. 3. Individuals transporting Bearby must take him at least 5 miles or up to 100 miles in one trip. 4. You may NOT take him near your homes. We have a GPS locator on Bearby (due to past felonies) so we don’t want to compromise your home locations. 5. Do not exceed the speed limit by more than 5 miles per hour, because that’s what the cops are cool with, obviously. This isn’t Cannonball Run. Make it happen, gishers. Bearby is counting on you to help him land his dream job! #204  -  40  -  Escape Gishwhes! https://www.gishwhes.com/escape-room/. If you manage to break out of this wild ride of mystery and mayhem, you’ll be prompted to enter your Team Name to document your success via an online form. BEFORE YOU HIT THE SUBMIT BUTTON, take a screenshot showing your team name in the Text Input Field and save the image, THEN hit the SUBMIT button. Your submission will be uploading the screenshot on our item list (backed up by what the online form sends gishbot). #205  -  28  -  We've received a bit of criticism that the hunt is "not really a scavenger hunt, it's just Misha getting people to help him with his chores." I'm honestly shocked anyone would say that! Also, people have been complaining that there are "too many geographically specific items" (items that require you to show up at a certain place). I want you to know that I'm listening and processing your feedback! So, I'm adding the following item: Help me help you help me help myself. Show up at 10 AM PDT sharp tomorrow at this location in Bellingham, WA. Wear long sleeves (pants and shirt) and bring a small bucket. Pick at least ONE quart of blackberries and DEPOSIT them into my big vessel so I can make lots of jam. For the item submission you must do two things: 1) You must find the woman in the sock monkey hat with the sheet of paper who is taking down team names and 2) You must take a photo of yourself with your bucket of berries. We will cross-check our list with your submitted photo as your proof. No taking pictures with me, because last year we did that and it ended up taking forever. If no one one on your team lives nearby, you may assign a surrogate, but no surrogate may service more than one team. #206  -  17  -  We got this letter to our support gnomes: Name: [REDACTED] Message : Hello Gishpeople. I want to question why there are so many specific-locations-that-aren't-Sweden only items, and no Sweden only items. I speak for all Swedes when we say that we find this very saddening. We don't understand how you could miss out on an opportunity like this, since Sweden is a very beautiful country, containting great things such as Dalahästar. We, as a nation, expect a formal apology for this, of course. All our love, and some sad wonders, [REDACTED] Sweden, you're absolutely right! You are a beautiful country and it's time we stopped overlooking you. You deserve a formal apology as requested and so in the interest of international diplomacy, it's our duty to deliver and rectify this egregious oversight. With that in mind, (I hope you'll forgive me but this is a location-specific image to appease Sweden, guys): Take a picture of yourself in front of the biggest landmark or point of interest in your town while holding a beautiful hand-lettered sign that reads, "We Are Sorry, Sweden". This is a location-based item, so you may do this anywhere in the world... except Sweden. #207  -  48  -  Nothing says "good life choices" like a last-minute rush job tattoo. Get inked with a tattoo that includes "We create therefore we live" or another gishy quote written in any language other than English. Feel free to adorn it with mascots or other hunt-inspired iconography. PS: Don't try to repurpose an old tattoo— we'll be able to tell and your team will be docked points. #208  -  18  -  As you know, no one was able to successfully find Jared Padalecki or Jensen Ackles' balls in Canada. Misha's balls are a lot easier to find... maybe because they really get around. Find Misha's balls in any of the following locations & take a picture with them. Then put them back EXACTLY where you found them so another team can have a chance to get their hands on Misha's balls, too. LOCATIONS: near the Cathedral Basilica, Newark, NJ; outside Gatorland, Orlando, FL, near Rothko Chapel in Houston, Texas. #209  -  77  -  Gishwhes is over tonight! Forever! The crumbs of the great multi-year, wild and weird global feast are soon to be all that's left. Let's see you work magic on these crumbs (real bread crumbs or whatever other crumbs you wish to use) and turn them into a portrait of actor Misha Collins. -the Gish Gnomes

[devnasirali]

Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images

Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images can help us in knowing more about girls. Cute girls use their instinct in knowing what is best for them. Girls who are confident can feel good and look good as well. Quotes for girls can be usually found on social network profiles. Quotes or sayings are written by famous writers. Most often people remember these girls quotes rather than their authors. These quotes will remain on the minds of the people and will always be found in books. Most importantly these quotes about girls can create a great impact in our lives.

Words are more powerful nowadays. In fact, it can make people change their minds and at the same time inspire them to do certain things. Girls quotes are quite popular nowadays and most people use them in their social networks. During the old days, people post their cool picture, but now they use quotes in their profile page. Here are some quotes for girls that you can share to your friends or you can use in your social networks

Cute & Stylish Girl’s Quotes

Nowadays every girl update their social profiles picture and status on whatsapp, facebook frequently and for this you need new cute girly status and stylish girly quotes regularly. To solve this problem we give you best charming and cool Whatsapp Status for girls and we updated this post regularly. Our huge collection of girlish attitude quotes will surely reflect what every girl has in mind and now its up to you, how you use these status and convey your feelings.

When a woman tells you about her problems it doesn’t mean she’s complaining…It means she trust you.

Avoid comparing yourself with others. If you do, you’ll lose the chance to see the beauty in you.

Tall guy + short girl = cute ….. but short guy + tall girl = awkward.

Don’t be a woman that needs a man …. Be a woman a man needs.

Someone asked me, How’s life….? I just smiled and replied, She’s fine.

Girls are like telephones.they love to be held and talked to,but if you push the wrong button you get disconnected.

What a girl really wants is for one guy to prove to her that they are not all the same.

Behind every in-trusted girl, Is a boy who lied, cheated, Broke his promises to her.

A true lady doesn’t demand, She thanks and true man doesn’t promise, He commit’s.

I hate boys who can’t treat their girls right, disrespect their mom’s, don’t want a job and want to smoke to fit in.

The most precious gift you can give a girl is the gift of your time and attention.

Excuse me …. Please empty your pockets …. I think you stole my heart.

Every girl deserves a guy who will say, “I can’t imagine my life without you”.

I hate boys who will continue to argue with a female. You will never win. Girls keep going until they get the last word, or piss you off.

Beautiful Status of Girls

A GIRL is the most beautiful part of Gods creation.

If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything.

Treat your Lady with Respect because one day You’ll need Your Daughter to be treated the Same…:)

A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.

Girls are like phones. They love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you’ll be disconnected!

Dear God I don’t want anything from you just bless my mom-dad with hot son-in-law!

When a woman tells you about her problems it doesn’t mean she’s complaining…It means she trust you.

Avoid comparing yourself with others. If you do, you’ll lose the chance to see the beauty in you.

Tall guy + short girl = cute ….. but short guy + tall girl = awkward.

Girls are like telephones.they love to be held and talked to,but if you push the wrong button you get disconnected.

Related Articles :

30 Best Inspiring Girls Quotes Ideas With Images

Charming Cool Whatsapp Status For Cute Girls Quotes and Images

60 Most Stylish Cool WhatsApp Wallpapers 2017

Cool WhatsApp Status for Girls; Because you are really Cool

Cute Status For Girls

If a man expects his wife to be an angel in his life, Then he should first create a heaven for her.

Holding a girls hand in public is just another way of saying you are proud to have her.

Dear Boys I have sent you a “Friend Request” Not a “Marriage Proposal” so kindly stop over acting :p

Every girl is an angel. Don’t waste time in selecting unique. Instead spend time in understanding them.

The problem with us girls is that we fall for boys who gives us the sweetest words they never really mean.

She can be your best friend, Worst enemy or a real sweetheart. It all depends on how you treat her.

Girls with the prettiest smiles, Always seem to tell the saddest stories.

Treat her like a queen and she will treat you like a king. Treat her like a game and she will show you how it’s played.

Never Judge The Beauty Of A Girl By Her Profile Picture.. Judge It By The Photos She Is Tagged In..!! 😉

Behind every in-trusted girl, Is a boy who lied, cheated, Broke his promises to her.

A true lady doesn’t demand, She thanks and true man doesn’t promise, He commit’s.

I hate boys who can’t treat their girls right, disrespect their mom’s, don’t want a job and want to smoke to fit in.

The most precious gift you can give a girl is the gift of your time and attention.

Boys never realize how much one little thing can hurt a girl.

He thinks he’s a player, But he doesn’t know she’s the coach.

Short Status For Girls

With women the heart argues, Not the mind.

I`m a girl. I can be complicated without explanations.

Every girl deserves to be treated like a princess.

Girls give & forgive. Boys get & forget.

Dear boys, Please surprise us and text us first? Love every girl.[/sq[

[sq]Women are meant to be loved, Not to be understood.

Wait for the boy who will do anything to be your everything.

When a girl says, “I`m done,” it really means, “fight for me.”

I hate boys who think they can get any girl.

Nothing is sexier than a girl who knows how to take control.

Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs, send him to KFC.

Girls are not toys.. You can’t just drop them when you get bored.

Read More : Awesome Style Status

Tall guy + short girl = cutie 🙂 but short guy + tall girl = awkward.

Don’t be a woman that needs a man …. Be a woman a man needs.

Someone asked me, How’s life….? I just smiled and replied, She’s fine.

Cute Whatsapp Status For Girls

I’m the type of girl that puts on her better smile, her better outfit, and better attitude and shows him what he left behind.

Excuse me …. Please empty your pockets …. I think you stole my heart.

Every girl deserves a guy who will say, “I can’t imagine my life without you”.

I hate boys who will continue to argue with a female. You will never win. Girls keep going until they get the last word, or piss you off.

You will find a girl prettier than me, smarter than me, and funnier than me, but you will never find a girl just like me.

I’m a girl. I overreact. I underestimate. I overestimate. I over think everything. I dream big. And when I say I love you, I’m not lying!

The sweetest things you can do for a girl are the little things that let her know she’s in your heart and on your mind.

I’m not one in a million kind of girls. I’m once in a lifetime kind of woman.

A woman brought you into this world. Therefore you have no right to disrespect one.

Silence is a girls loudest cry. You know she’s really hurt when she starts ignoring you.

Women are like stars, there are millions of them out there, but only one can make your dreams come true.

Facebook Status For Girls

Google must be a woman, it knows everything.

Make up is overpriced, hair products are overpriced, body products are overpriced, clothing is overpriced, being a girl is overpriced

Dear Girls, Always remember The charming boys are just better liars.

A girl`s smile hides thousand words, a girl`s tears hides thousand feelings.

I hate texting you first, because it feels like I`m annoying you.

Men wear the pants in the relationship but women control the zipper.

Dear Girl, don’t worry if you’re still single. God is looking at you right now saying,”I’m saving this girl for someone special.

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.

Every girl needs a good guy who can help her laugh when she thinks she’ll never smile again.

When a girl cries, it’s not usually over one thing. It’s built up anger and emotions that she’s been holding in for too long.

I`m a girl but I rather hang out with boys because it is less drama.

Best feeling ever is when you lose weight, and your boobs stay the same size.

Men are like a deck of cards. You`ll find the occasional king, but most are jacks.

Interesting Girls Quotes with Images

#gallery-0-5 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-5 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 25%; } #gallery-0-5 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-5 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

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These are just some of the best girls quotes that can help us understand about girls.  Some girls are simple while there are also others who are always fond of fashion.  They want to wear the latest trends in order to stand out among friends.  They want to be updated with the current news and activities in the fashion world.

If you enjoyed reading this post then you will surely love reading our other posts such as Coolest Whatsapp Status For Girls With Quotes and others.

100+ Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images

Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images can help us in knowing more about girls.

100+ Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images

Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images can help us in knowing more about girls.

100+ Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images can help us in knowing more about girls.

[trendingbookmarks]

Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images

Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images can help us in knowing more about girls. Cute girls use their instinct in knowing what is best for them. Girls who are confident can feel good and look good as well. Quotes for girls can be usually found on social network profiles. Quotes or sayings are written by famous writers. Most often people remember these girls quotes rather than their authors. These quotes will remain on the minds of the people and will always be found in books. Most importantly these quotes about girls can create a great impact in our lives.

Words are more powerful nowadays. In fact, it can make people change their minds and at the same time inspire them to do certain things. Girls quotes are quite popular nowadays and most people use them in their social networks. During the old days, people post their cool picture, but now they use quotes in their profile page. Here are some quotes for girls that you can share to your friends or you can use in your social networks

Cute & Stylish Girl’s Quotes

Nowadays every girl update their social profiles picture and status on whatsapp, facebook frequently and for this you need new cute girly status and stylish girly quotes regularly. To solve this problem we give you best charming and cool Whatsapp Status for girls and we updated this post regularly. Our huge collection of girlish attitude quotes will surely reflect what every girl has in mind and now its up to you, how you use these status and convey your feelings.

When a woman tells you about her problems it doesn’t mean she’s complaining…It means she trust you.

Avoid comparing yourself with others. If you do, you’ll lose the chance to see the beauty in you.

Tall guy + short girl = cute ….. but short guy + tall girl = awkward.

Don’t be a woman that needs a man …. Be a woman a man needs.

Someone asked me, How’s life….? I just smiled and replied, She’s fine.

Girls are like telephones.they love to be held and talked to,but if you push the wrong button you get disconnected.

What a girl really wants is for one guy to prove to her that they are not all the same.

Behind every in-trusted girl, Is a boy who lied, cheated, Broke his promises to her.

A true lady doesn’t demand, She thanks and true man doesn’t promise, He commit’s.

I hate boys who can’t treat their girls right, disrespect their mom’s, don’t want a job and want to smoke to fit in.

The most precious gift you can give a girl is the gift of your time and attention.

Excuse me …. Please empty your pockets …. I think you stole my heart.

Every girl deserves a guy who will say, “I can’t imagine my life without you”.

I hate boys who will continue to argue with a female. You will never win. Girls keep going until they get the last word, or piss you off.

Beautiful Status of Girls

A GIRL is the most beautiful part of Gods creation.

If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything.

Treat your Lady with Respect because one day You’ll need Your Daughter to be treated the Same…:)

A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.

Girls are like phones. They love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you’ll be disconnected!

Dear God I don’t want anything from you just bless my mom-dad with hot son-in-law!

When a woman tells you about her problems it doesn’t mean she’s complaining…It means she trust you.

Avoid comparing yourself with others. If you do, you’ll lose the chance to see the beauty in you.

Tall guy + short girl = cute ….. but short guy + tall girl = awkward.

Girls are like telephones.they love to be held and talked to,but if you push the wrong button you get disconnected.

Related Articles :

30 Best Inspiring Girls Quotes Ideas With Images

Charming Cool Whatsapp Status For Cute Girls Quotes and Images

60 Most Stylish Cool WhatsApp Wallpapers 2017

Cool WhatsApp Status for Girls; Because you are really Cool

Cute Status For Girls

If a man expects his wife to be an angel in his life, Then he should first create a heaven for her.

Holding a girls hand in public is just another way of saying you are proud to have her.

Dear Boys I have sent you a “Friend Request” Not a “Marriage Proposal” so kindly stop over acting :p

Every girl is an angel. Don’t waste time in selecting unique. Instead spend time in understanding them.

The problem with us girls is that we fall for boys who gives us the sweetest words they never really mean.

She can be your best friend, Worst enemy or a real sweetheart. It all depends on how you treat her.

Girls with the prettiest smiles, Always seem to tell the saddest stories.

Treat her like a queen and she will treat you like a king. Treat her like a game and she will show you how it’s played.

Never Judge The Beauty Of A Girl By Her Profile Picture.. Judge It By The Photos She Is Tagged In..!! 😉

Behind every in-trusted girl, Is a boy who lied, cheated, Broke his promises to her.

A true lady doesn’t demand, She thanks and true man doesn’t promise, He commit’s.

I hate boys who can’t treat their girls right, disrespect their mom’s, don’t want a job and want to smoke to fit in.

The most precious gift you can give a girl is the gift of your time and attention.

Boys never realize how much one little thing can hurt a girl.

He thinks he’s a player, But he doesn’t know she’s the coach.

Short Status For Girls

With women the heart argues, Not the mind.

I`m a girl. I can be complicated without explanations.

Every girl deserves to be treated like a princess.

Girls give & forgive. Boys get & forget.

Dear boys, Please surprise us and text us first? Love every girl.[/sq[

[sq]Women are meant to be loved, Not to be understood.

Wait for the boy who will do anything to be your everything.

When a girl says, “I`m done,” it really means, “fight for me.”

I hate boys who think they can get any girl.

Nothing is sexier than a girl who knows how to take control.

Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs, send him to KFC.

Girls are not toys.. You can’t just drop them when you get bored.

Read More : Awesome Style Status

Tall guy + short girl = cutie 🙂 but short guy + tall girl = awkward.

Don’t be a woman that needs a man …. Be a woman a man needs.

Someone asked me, How’s life….? I just smiled and replied, She’s fine.

Cute Whatsapp Status For Girls

I’m the type of girl that puts on her better smile, her better outfit, and better attitude and shows him what he left behind.

Excuse me …. Please empty your pockets …. I think you stole my heart.

Every girl deserves a guy who will say, “I can’t imagine my life without you”.

I hate boys who will continue to argue with a female. You will never win. Girls keep going until they get the last word, or piss you off.

You will find a girl prettier than me, smarter than me, and funnier than me, but you will never find a girl just like me.

I’m a girl. I overreact. I underestimate. I overestimate. I over think everything. I dream big. And when I say I love you, I’m not lying!

The sweetest things you can do for a girl are the little things that let her know she’s in your heart and on your mind.

I’m not one in a million kind of girls. I’m once in a lifetime kind of woman.

A woman brought you into this world. Therefore you have no right to disrespect one.

Silence is a girls loudest cry. You know she’s really hurt when she starts ignoring you.

Women are like stars, there are millions of them out there, but only one can make your dreams come true.

Facebook Status For Girls

Google must be a woman, it knows everything.

Make up is overpriced, hair products are overpriced, body products are overpriced, clothing is overpriced, being a girl is overpriced

Dear Girls, Always remember The charming boys are just better liars.

A girl`s smile hides thousand words, a girl`s tears hides thousand feelings.

I hate texting you first, because it feels like I`m annoying you.

Men wear the pants in the relationship but women control the zipper.

Dear Girl, don’t worry if you’re still single. God is looking at you right now saying,”I’m saving this girl for someone special.

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.

Every girl needs a good guy who can help her laugh when she thinks she’ll never smile again.

When a girl cries, it’s not usually over one thing. It’s built up anger and emotions that she’s been holding in for too long.

I`m a girl but I rather hang out with boys because it is less drama.

Best feeling ever is when you lose weight, and your boobs stay the same size.

Men are like a deck of cards. You`ll find the occasional king, but most are jacks.

Interesting Girls Quotes with Images

#gallery-0-5 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-5 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 25%; } #gallery-0-5 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-5 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

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Girlish Coolwhatsappstatus 022

Girlish Coolwhatsappstatus 023

These are just some of the best girls quotes that can help us understand about girls.  Some girls are simple while there are also others who are always fond of fashion.  They want to wear the latest trends in order to stand out among friends.  They want to be updated with the current news and activities in the fashion world.

If you enjoyed reading this post then you will surely love reading our other posts such as Coolest Whatsapp Status For Girls With Quotes and others.

100+ Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images

Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images can help us in knowing more about girls.

100+ Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images Interesting Girls Quotes and Sayings with Images can help us in knowing more about girls.