#this immediately made me have a panic attack and now i have to stay up all night writing an essay in a desparate attempt to pacify one of th
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suncoved · 3 months ago
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BIG MAN ON CAMPUS! — RAFE CAMERON
pairing; fratboy!rafe cameron x fem!reader
summary; you come to your first college party and have the worst panic attack of your life. who knew your knight in shining armour would be the captain of the biggest fraternity and the biggest fuck boy on campus
warnings ; panic attacks, anxiety, drugging, angst but like fluff!!
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"Liv, i'm really not sure about this"
You're best friend and roommate looked at you with a blank stare, watching as you pulled the tight white dress down that had ridden up your thighs. She had dragged you out of your dorm only 20 minutes ago, telling you that if you didn't come she was going to wake you up with a bucket of ice water.
"Cmon babe, you made me promise i would drag you to at least one party this year. and i don't break a promise. Which also means that i promise if you don't like the first 30 minutes, then we can go home and eat 30 pounds of ice cream and pass out in our makeup"
You smiled at her, trying to push yourself through whatever anxiety was coursing through you. Liv was really a good friend, even if she was harsh about it at times, you know that she wanted the best for you.
The smell of booze and sweat hit your nose immediately as you walked into the frat house, the music blasting and the rainbow lights blinding against the otherwise dark space.
Liv pulled you to the corner of the living room, smiling brightly at you and giving you an extra tight hug. "Ok! I'm gonna go get us some drinks, stay right there and don't move!"
She had to yell because of how loud the music was, wasting no time before disappearing into the kitchen.
You stood in the party like a fish out of water, biting your lip as you looked down at your feet.
You'd like to say that you weren't that much of an introvert. I mean sure you liked to be curled up with a good book from time to time, and you were studying a bit more than healthy. But you like to go out and shop with friends, talk to new people in your classes and slumber parties on the weekends.
But parties were something you did not do. It had a combination of all the things you disliked most in life. loud music, people yelling, drinking, flashing bright lights and... frat boys.
You'd already been brought out of your shell at college, you were confident enough now to present in classes and partner up with new people on assignments, but this was pushing it.
You were a sweet girl, but naive. You didn't have enough experience with greedy men and even you would admit that you resembled a lost deer more often than you would like.
You lifted your head as you heard someone approach you, looking up quickly as you assumed it was Liv coming back from the kitchen.
But it wasn't Liv.
A brunette looked straight at you as you made eye contact with him, a red solo cup resting in his hand.
"What's a pretty girl like you standing here all alone in the corner" he stated, inching closer to you as you subconsciously stepped back a bit. "I'm Jeremey"
He reached out his hand to you to shake, only to receive a dumbfounded look on your face.
"Normally people reply back with their name, Babe"
"Oh! Sorry!" you replied flustered, repeating back your name as he grinned wide, showing his bright smile.
You didn't want to admit that when Jeremy was talking to you, you continually kept glancing over at the entrance to the kitchen, hoping that the next person to walk out was Liv, who was going to hopefully come to save you from this conversation.
"Hey, I was experimenting in the kitchen, wanna try my new concoction." Jeremy dangled the red solo cup in your face, the liquid pink and smelling of strawberries.
"No thank you. I don't drink" you replied sweetly, hoping to be polite and not upset him. "There's barely any in it, promise. Pleaseee, don't wanna hurt my feelings, do you?" He replied in annoyance.
A pang of hurt shot through you as you panicked, how could you have been so rude! Jeremy was taking time out of his day to talk to you and you rejected a drink he made you?
"Oh! no, I'm sorry. Thank you so much" you replied, taking the cup out of his hands and looking down at the liquid. He watched closely as you took a sip, your face twisting at the strong flavour of vodka.
"What do you think?" he smirked as he asked, bringing his hand up to your lips and wiping the extra liquid off with his thumb.
"Its- its great, thank you" you replied, your heart beating faster as you started to feel increasingly more uncomfortable. He watched you closely as he hinted to you to drink more, looking down at you like he was a wolf, and you were his prey.
You held back tears as you felt the room start to spin under your feet, your cheeks feeling hot and your hands shaking involuntarily. It hit you quickly that this wasn't alcohol that was making you feel like this, no, it was something else. Something much, much worse.
And you didn't want to stick around to figure out what it was.
"Um, sorry Jeremy, I need to go to the bathroom" you spoke up, using all your courage to push through the crowd quickly as he followed.
Your breath was now speeding up as you fought your way through the waves of people, your steps becoming faster as you felt the room spinning more and more, tears streaming down your face.
You didn't know where the bathrooms in this place were, but you didn't have time to think about that now.
You just needed to find Liv, or someone, anyone.
Your eyes fell on a room at the end of the hall, light spilling out of the crack where the door failed to meet the floor.
You didn't have time to think, just to act. Your balled fist made it up to the door, knocking over and over again as you looked behind you, Jeremy in the crowd but looking all over for what you assumed to be you.
You didn't even want to begin to imagine how stupid you looked, or how impolite you were being as your knocks became harsher and frantic as Jeremy came closer.
"Jesus, learn how to wait your fucking turn" a voice sounded as the door opened. you didn't even look away from Jeremy as you tumbled into the bathroom, accidentally bringing the person in the door with you.
"Yo, what the fuc-" the aggressive voice came to a halt quickly, but you all you could focus on was your breathing, which was out of control.
Your cheeks were wet with tears as you closed your eyes, bringing your hands up to your face and letting yourself sob. "I- I can't breathe" You let out, unknowing if you were talking to yourself or the person in the space with you.
You couldn't even handle your anxiety and emotions when you were in control of your body, let alone now.
That's the main reason you don't drink, because you tend to freak out to the point of no return, and this, this was much worse.
Your face was buried in your hands as the person softly closed the door to the bathroom. You didn't even register him softly moving you to sit on the toilet seat in the bathroom, kneeling down and removing your hands from your face.
You opened your eyes to see a man's face looking back at you, his features painted with worry and his body distanced enough away from you as to not upset you even more.
"Hey- hey. Its ok, what's wrong?" the boy asked, trying not to show how confused he was on how to deal with this situation. "Are you hurt?"
You shook your head quickly at his statement, your tears slowly coming to a halt as your vision became less blurry. You could now see his face more clearly. Fluffy dirty blonde hair, bright blue eyes, soft pink lips.
"Uh, um. Wait" He spoke, breaking eye contact with you for the first time since you entered the bathroom. He started frantically opening draws and cabinets, stopping when he found a box of tissues under the sink.
"Here" you looked between him and the box he was handing you before taking it in your hands, your fingers brushing past each other momentarily.
"Thank you, i-i promise I'm not this much of a mess all the time." You replied, earning a soft smile from the man. "It's ok, it happens to the best of us. Have you taken anything, or just drunk?" He asked delicately.
Rafe didn't understand what he was feeling at this moment. Because he'd never felt it before.
Sure he could be an asshole sometimes, He was rude and got into fights on occasion, and he had been known to make girls complete the walk of shame out of his room involuntarily after a big night out, but that didn't mean he would ever leave a clearly intoxicated girl alone at a frat party.
But this, this was different. He had to know what was wrong with you, and he had to fix it. Sure you were a mystery to him and only met you seconds ago, but he wasn't leaving until he knew you were safe and sound... and had given him your name.
"I don't drink- or, at least I didn't. This boy gave me something, it tasted weird. Then I got all dizzy and now- now I can't stop crying" You rambled, sighing softly and looking into his eyes.
He gazed back at you, running his tongue around his teeth before seemingly snapping out of the trance he was in. "Did you know the guy?" He huffed, obviously agitated with your reply as he ran his fingers through his hair.
You shook your head softly, a wave of sadness running through you because you couldn't give him the answer he wanted. Tears started running down your face again suddenly as you kept repeating 'I'm sorry' over and over again.
He lifted his thumb up to your cheek, softly brushing the tears away. "Hey it's okay, Don't worry. I'll keep you safe"
He didn't understand the feelings he was feeling, He had never craved to protect someone so much, He had never been this gentle in his whole life.
"What's your name?" he asked, distracting you to hopefully stop the flow of tears streaming down your face. He felt like if you didn't stop crying in the next minute, he was going to lose it.
You answered your name to him, earning a soft smile. "I'm Rafe, it's nice to meet you." He finished the sentence with your name, sending shivers down your spine.
"Liv" You gasped, making his head tilt in confusion before you shot up from your seat. "Wow, ma. Slow down, what do you mean?" Rafe replied, holding your hips to stop you from completely falling over. You sat back down quickly in defeat, your eyes wide with panic.
"Liv, I-I came here with my friend Liv. I'm gonna scare her. I need to find her." You gasped, your voice trembling as you spoke. "It's ok, We'll find her. Don't worry, it's ok." He repeated, desperate for your face to get back to your normal expression, aka, not struck with terror.
It was obvious to Rafe through the glaze cast over your eyes, the shaking from your hands and the drooping of your eyelids that someone had slipped something into your drink.
He had hosted enough parties at his fraternity to know what insecure, probably small dicked boys, not men, can do to women. And it revolted him.
"R-rafe. I'm gonna go to sleep now" You whispered, your body finally giving out before you could stop it, his arms quickly coming up to stabilize you before you toppled over.
He bit his lip as he tried to figure out what to do, pulling your body into his arms as you didn't even stir. He was scared. So scared.
He didn't know what you were given, how much you were given, what would happen after you woke up, if you even woke up at all.
He carried you up the stairs and into his bedroom, unlocking the door and locking it behind him again. His room was the only one with a lock in the whole house, because he was damned if he was going to walk in on random strangers having drunk sex on his bed.
He rested you softly on his bed, making sure your head was comfortably on his pillow and resting a blanket over your body after taking your heels off.
He looked at your sleeping form, your long eyelashes resting on your cheeks, your hair falling softly over your shoulders and your chest rising and falling with your breaths.
He looked at you one last time before leaving his room, ignoring every person greeting him as he made a beeline straight for the living room.
He scanned over the large crowd in the house, numerous people dancing, some making out, his frat brothers doing keg stands, and one very panicked girl going up to every stranger she sees.
Rafe took no time before walking straight to the girl in the middle of the dance floor, tapping her on the shoulder. She turns immediately to face Rafe, her face struck with confusion.
"Are you Liv?" Rafe asks, earning a confused nod from the girl in front of him” I am! Have you seen my best friend anywhere? She's about yay height, really pretty, heart of gold, she kinda looks like that baby deer from that Disney movie, she's wearing this white dress and-"
Rafe stops her ramble with a quick nod causing her eyes to widen. "What? Where is she?"
"In my bed" Rafe replied, remembering he wasn't all that good with small talk. "What? What the fuck do you mean, in your bed? What did you do? I swear to god-"
"Ok, calm down. Someone gave her something. I found her in the bathroom sobbing before she passed out. I put her in my bed then came down here, end of story" He replied, starting to get slightly agitated.
The girl he now knows to be Liv quickly walks off, heading straight for upstairs where the bedrooms are. Rafe rolls his eyes before following swiftly behind her, though he's glad that there's someone out there other than him trying to protect his newfound soft spot.
Liv halts at all the bedrooms, looking expectantly at Rafe before he walks in front of her and opens his door. Liv immediately rushes to you, still passed out on Rafe's bed.
She sits next to you, tucking your hair behind your ear before placing a kiss on your forehead. "Of course, on the first party she goes to, some sick fuck roofies her and she ends up in Rafe Cameron's bed" Liv speaks, not taking her eyes off you.
"How do you know my name?" Rafe asks, not even bothering to look at the person he's talking to as he focuses on your chest rising and falling. "Ha, everyone knows who you are Rafe. And if I find out you had anything to do with her getting hurt, I'm gonna chop your dick off and feed it to you and make sure everyone on campus knows it"
It would be a lie to say Rafe wasn't slightly amused by your best friend's words, holding back his smile and keeping his face stern. "I would never do that shit. Especially not to her" Liv's eyebrow quirked in confusion at the last bit of his sentence.
She knows for a fact that you did not know Rafe Cameron before this night, let alone any frat boys. Liv could cry at the sight of your passed-out form, taking full blame and responsibility for the fact that you got hurt when she was meant to protect you.
She pulled her phone out from her purse, about to call an Uber back to the dorms for both of you. "No, I'll drive you" He stated, not leaving room for an argument
Liv nodded slowly before pulling the blanket off you, your body involuntarily starting to shiver from the cold air.
Rafe walked over to his closet, grabbing his warmest hoodie. Liv looked up at him as he raised your body softly, placing the hoodie over your head and softly lifting you up into his arms.
Rafe walked with Liv down to the road outside the fraternity house, receiving hundreds of stares from people in the crowd. But he didn't care, all he cared about was you.
He let Liv open the door to the backseat of his truck, allowing him to place you softly inside before Liv climbed in next to you, placing your head on her lap.
The ride was completely silent, barring Liv's directions to the dormitories, but she didn't miss the way he was constantly looking in the rearview mirror at you.
It didn't take long before Liv was leading the way to your dorm, Rafe trailing slowly behind with you in his arms.
She flicked the light on in your dorm, Rafe quickly knowing which bed was yours from the multiple stuffies and pink blankets. He lifted the covers before placing your head on the pillow once more, knowing Liv was going to get you changed before she slept.
"Thank you, Rafe, for looking out for her when I didn't" Liv said as Rafe walked to your door, nodding curtly in repose to her statement.
He gave you one last look before he walked out of your door, watching as Liv was about to shut the door on him after saying goodbye. Panicked he placed his foot in front of the door before it shut, forcing it open.
"C-can I get her number, please?"
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thesecondhandwoman · 2 months ago
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NIGHTMARES
Sevika x f!reader
Synopsis: You were experiencing heavy, traumatic nightmares again, reliving unwanted memories, and resulted in you waking up dazed. It was to the point where Sevika had to step in, even when you barely recognized her.
The nightmare hit with the intensity of a freight train, dragging you back to a place you’d fought hard to escape. The dim, oppressive walls of an unfamiliar room surrounded you, the scent of blood and sweat hanging heavy in the air. You could hear your attacker’s breath, feel the harsh, burning touch of their hands on your body, their low voice whispering cruel, taunting words into your ear.
Your chest tightened, and the sounds of your breath started to quicken in sync with the panic that surged through you. The room felt too small, suffocating.
You wanted to escape.
You tried to scream for help, but your voice wouldn’t come. The terror was suffocating, overwhelming, and you couldn’t stop it. You couldn’t escape.
Suddenly, you shot up from the bed, gasping for air, drenched in sweat, your heart hammering in your chest. The room around you felt unfamiliar, wrong. Your breath was ragged, and the shadows of your nightmare seemed to creep into the corners of your vision, blurring everything in sight.
Sevika stirred beside you, instinctively sitting up when she felt the tension in the bed. Her sharp, calculating eyes immediately found yours, wide and panicked.
“Hey, hey,” Sevika’s low voice was soft but commanding, the tone not unfamiliar, but something about the urgency in her voice made your heart race faster. “It’s just a nightmare. You’re safe.”
But the darkness clung to you, the terror from the dream still sharp in your mind. You looked at her, but in your panicked state, everything blurred together. Her face — her eyes — were distorted, morphing into something you couldn’t recognize. Something darker. Someone from your past. Someone that haunted you in your nightmares.
“No!” You screamed, backing away from her, your legs tangling in the sheets. “Stay away! Get away from me!”
Sevika was quick to react, trying to grab hold of your arms to steady you, but the touch only made you more panicked, more frantic. “No! No, please!” You yelled, shoving at her chest, desperate to get away from her.
“Shhh. I’ve got you, you’re okay,” Sevika’s voice tried to soothe, but you were too far gone, lost in the fog of your nightmare’s aftermath. Your breathing came in shallow, frantic gasps as your body trembled with fear.
“Please,” you begged, tears streaming down your face as you shoved her away. “You’re not real. You’re not real!”
Sevika froze, her expression momentarily hardening at your rejection, but then she took a deep breath, collecting herself. Her instinct to protect you overrode the hurt in her chest. “I’m real,” she insisted firmly, gently but firmly taking your hands, locking her gaze onto yours. “You’re not in that nightmare anymore. You’re with me.”
You flinched, your heart still hammering, your mind screaming at you to run, to get away from whatever this was — but she wasn’t letting you go.
“Please, don’t,” you sobbed, curling in on yourself as the adrenaline from the nightmare surged through you, heightening every sense, distorting reality. “I can’t…I can’t be here. Not with you!”
The pain in Sevika’s eyes was almost too much to bear, but she didn’t pull away. She was steady, unyielding, even as you fought her, even as your hands trembled against her chest in fear.
“I’m not leaving you, not now, not ever,” Sevika said, her voice softer now, though the firmness remained. Slowly, she pulled you into her arms, wrapping you in a protective hold despite your resistance.
“Let me go!” You shouted, struggling against her grip, but it was futile. She was stronger, and though your body fought her, she held you with an almost unnatural calm.
“You have to listen to me, please,” Sevika whispered, her voice now a quiet murmur. She stroked your back in slow, rhythmic motions, letting her presence become the anchor for your racing thoughts. “This is just a nightmare. You’re safe. You’re here, with me. You’re real. I’m real.”
Her words broke through the haze of your fear, and you gasped again, trembling, your hands pressing against her chest as if to push her away, but your strength was fading. You sobbed harder, unable to control the flood of emotions that came crashing over you — fear, relief, shame — all of it mixing into an overwhelming whirlwind.
Sevika didn’t say anything more. She didn’t need to. She just held you. Her presence, her scent, the strength of her embrace — all of it was there to remind you that you weren’t lost in that nightmare anymore.
Slowly, your breathing began to even out, the panic starting to recede as you buried your face against her shoulder. The raw fear still lingered in your chest, but now, Sevika was here. She was warm, solid, unyielding.
When you finally calmed, when the world around you began to settle back into focus, you pulled back just enough to look up at her face. Her eyes were filled with nothing but concern, her jaw tight as she resisted the urge to pull you back in too tightly. She had to give you space, even if it hurt.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered, your voice hoarse from the screaming, the tears. “I didn’t mean to… to push you away.”
Sevika’s gaze softened, her hands gently cupping your face as she wiped away the tears. “I know,” she said, her voice low and steady. “I know, love. It’s okay. I’m here. You’re safe now.”
You took a shaky breath, still in her embrace, but feeling the sting of the nightmare begin to fade. Slowly, your mind began to accept the truth: Sevika wasn’t your attacker. She was your protector. The person who would never hurt you, no matter how intense the shadows of your mind became.
“You’re my safe place,” you whispered, your voice barely audible as you leaned into her again, your head resting against her chest.
Sevika let out a long breath, relief flooding through her as she held you even tighter, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. “And I always will be,” she promised quietly.
And for the first time that night, you believed it.
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theanimeoftheblackbunnymask · 3 months ago
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Transitions (Yandere Dazai x Reader)
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Author's Note: This is based on the idea I had on how it would feel to be going from PM!Dazai's behavior towards his darling to ADA!Dazai's behavior. I also think people forget that Dazai was a teenager while he was in the Port Mafia, so reader is also around his age.
Warnings: Implied Non-Con, Mental Abuse, Physical Abuse, Torture, Emotional Abuse, Gaslighting, Manipulation, Delusions, Child Abuse, Assault, Implied Murder, PTSD, Panic Attacks Mentioned, Mental Breakdowns, Suicide Dicussed, Teasing, Mocking, and Sadism.
Links: {Masterlist} {Idea Concept}
Is it possible for a man like Dazai to change?
That was the only thing on your mind. You had been stuck with the man for years, you can remember the day of your abduction perfectly.
It was quick.
You were walking home from work. After your mother lost her job it became quite hard for her to pay the bills, so you picked up a job at the local grocery store. Balancing both High School and Work was no easy task. Your normal schedule was going to school until 3, tutoring until 4, and from 4 to 11 it was straight work. You'd often have to pull all nighters just to do assignments.
The day of your abduction was the day all those all nighters caught up with you. You walked with a drag, your vision blurred as you tried to stay awake, and every few seconds you'd let out a yawn. Normally you'd take the bus home or one of your co-workers would give you a ride, but recently you guys had grown short on staff, making you the only worker that night, and since it was a holiday the bus was running on a different schedule. Knowing what you knew about Dazai, he planned this all perfectly.
As you were walking you bumped into him, and maybe it was your exhaustion, but the moment you bumped into his chest you fell into his arms, your body going limp as he held you tightly.
That was the day you lost all freedom.
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"Wake up Princess/Princie~"
Opening your eyes, staring down at you was a suspiciously happy Dazai. You only stared at him as he sat next to you on the bed. When he initially kidnapped you, you were kept in a cell in the Port Mafia base.
You still remember how cold it was in there. The blood. The noise. Everything that took place in that cell still haunts you to this day. The very reminder of it sends a chill down your spine.
Now, the room you were kept in was actually a room. A queen sized bed in the middle, a vanity in the corner, a closet next to it, and on the other side of the room was a door that led to the bathroom. The room was decorated to your liking, but the only downside was the massive window that was barred up, forever reminding you of a freedom so close yet so far from your grasp.
"What's the matter? You still mad at me?" Dazai asked in his infamous baby voice, putting his hands on your cheeks in order for you to meet his gaze.
You only turned you head away, keeping your mouth shut.
Letting out a sigh, Dazai spoke. "Hey, don't be like that, Y/N."
You still didn't budge.
"You know that bastard deserved it."
"Did he, Dazai? Did he?" You snapped, now sitting up.
"Traitors don't live, Y/N," Dazai said nonchalantly as he got off the bed. "You should know that better then anyone."
You do.
"Why are you up so early?" You asked.
"The boss has a mission for Chuuya and I. I should be back around midnight, so you can do whatever you want in here until then!"
"Dazai."
"Hm?"
"Can I...," You paused, clenching your fist. "Ask you something?"
"Of course my dear! Ask away."
"When...when will you let me out?"
You felt energy in the room switch as Dazai's face dropped.
"Oh...My sweet, little Y/N," Dazaj cooed as he made his way towards you, gently grabbing your face. "You're a smart girl/boy. I know you know the awnser to that. Or will I have to remind you?"
His question immediately struck you with fear as you look up to him in a panic. Your hands shook as you tried to get him hands off your face, but his nails only dug further.
"Will I?"
The bloodlust in his tone. The emptiness in his eyes. It's all too familiar.
"No...no! I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry. I'm sorry for asking, just please..." You pleaded as you gripped your hair, you eyes fixated on your lap as memories flooded your mind. "Not again.'
You could sense the smirk on his face as he kissed your forehead. "Smart choice. "
As you watched him leave through the exit of your prison, you could feel a tear roll down your face as the door slammed shut.
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Chuuya was the only person in the entire Port Mafia who you felt cared at least a little bit about your situation. Besides you and Mori, he knew just how cruel Dazai could be, and whenever he spotted whatever bandages were on your body, for the quickest second you could see sympathy in his eyes. You remember one time he found you crying in your cell after one of Dazai's punishments. Your body was in so much pain that you could barely move, and your mind was scattered that you couldn't even think straight. You were naked and cold, but your skin burned in pain.
Tilting his head down, using his hat to hide his gaze, Chuuya quietly opened the cell, laid his coat over you, and walked out just as quickly and quietly as he had entered.
However, you kept your fondness of Chuuya a secret from Dazai. You knew Dazai would never kill Chuuya even if he found out about his acts of kindness. Jealous? Most likely. Angry? Definitely not. Dazai saw and knew everything you did, every thought you had, you knew that he most likely knew. He was always watching you, or at least he made you believe so.
And that was why you haven't escaped yet.
The thing is, escaping Dazai is easy, stupidly easy, but staying free was damn near impossible. He could find you in a matter of seconds, or you would run back before he realized you were gone. You see, there was 1 time you escaped Dazai, and it was a moment that you would never forget. He made sure of that.
It was a week after your abduction. You were able to notice that everytime Dazai left for a mission, he'd never lock your door. So, when he told you that he'd be gone for a couple of days in order to complete a mission, you took that as your chance.
You were able to make it to the city were you wandered around for a bit. Eventually your exhaustion caught up to you, so you seemed refuge in a random motel after pretty guilt tripping the owner into letting you spend the night.
You feel bad that owner.
In the middle of the night, the motel caught, and by the time you woke up, Dazai was staring down at you, his empty eyes staring into yours.
Up until this point Dazai hadn't done anything to you. The most he would do was come into your cell and cuddle you for hours on end while telling you about his day. He seemed so soft despite the vibe he gave off. Sometimes he'd drag you to meeting with him where he'd nuzzle into your neck. But, this mistake flipped a switch a switch in him.
You lost your innocence that night.
Bruises, cuts, and bites littered your body, and all you did afterwards was hug your knees and stare blankly into space. Nothing could break you out of of that state, anything to make you forget what happened, anything to forget the pain.
He didn't stop there though. Night after night he'd escalate things further and further. At one point he broke both of your legs, dislocated your shoulders, and broke your fingers. He made sure one of your fingers healed incorrectly just for it to be a permanent reminder. And didn't stop at physical stuff either.
For nights on end he'd force you stay awake, and he'd play mind games with you too. He'd force you to complete nearly impossible task in your exhausted state, and then mock you to tears when you couldn't do them.
He did this for days just to teach you a lesson. When the lesson was over you were broken in, just like that. In the span of two weeks you became his lap dog, and he was disappointed at how easily you broke. I mean, why wouldn’t it be easy? You were only 16.
Any escape attempt after this would result in a panic attack. You would run back to your room where Dazai would be waiting, and while you had tears rolling down your cheeks, you'd run into his arms in order to seek even a little bit of comfort.
After a week of isolation, it was like another switch happened in Dazai. One day he came down to your cell and just broke down. You had never seen the man cry before. He then hugged you while spitting out a bunch of apologies.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I just..." Dazai started before his voice lowered into a whisper, his gaze fixated on the floor. "I never wanted to hurt you...never. I was just so... I'm sorry. I'll take care of everything, ok?"
Sometimes you forget he's just like you, a kid. A sadistic, scarily intelligent kid, but a kid none the less. You soon learned why he kidnapped you, what his motive was.
He wanted to feel something. Anything. The boy was hallow, a cunning killing machine. His entire personality was an act. If you were to cut him open, you'd find nothing. And somehow, he gravitated towards you.
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"Do you enjoy living?"
Dazai laid his head in your lap, his arms wrapped your waist as you ran your fingers through his hair. In the past couple months things have cooled down. You've lost any hope of escaping or for him to become any less cruel, so now you just follow his commands. Life has been easier this way, not enjoyable, but easier.
"Hm?" You responded, meeting his gaze.
"Your life. Everyday was the same thing. School, tutoring, work. Did you enjoy any of it?"
"Well, no, but it was worth it. Whenever I'd come home my mom would always be waiting for me at the dining table. Even as she got worse, she still was always there no matter how late I got home. And when I showed her my first paycheck," You face soften in remembrance. "The smile on her face made it all worth it."
Dazai was silent for a few moments for snuggling against your stomach.
"Humans confuse me."
You knew better than to ask him to elaborate. It's not because he'd be mad or anything, but you knew his awnser would leave you sleepless.
A life with Dazai was a life with uncertainty, unpredictability. Some days he'd be this soft little thing, clinging onto you like a baby and craving all your attention, whining when he didn't get it. But on other days, he'd force you to witness the execution of Mafia members, drag you on life threatening missions, use you as a pawn on missions, and force you witness his cruelty first hand.
Sometimes it's hard to believe he loves you. Sometimes you think you're just a pawn in his game.
--------------------------
Akutagawa hated your guts.
You got Dazai's praise, attention, and approval, and you did nothing to earn it. Anytime you looked at him, you see the hatred in his eyes.
A year after your abduction, Dazai started bringing you to his little trainings with Akutagawa, and you had one rule: Don't get close.
Seeing his treatment of the boy made you believe that you hadn't experienced the worse of his torment.
One day you couldn't watch it anymore. Dazai had kicked the boy so hard that he was coughing up blood.
"Get up," Dazai commanded coldly, slowly making his way towards the boy.
He was so weak that he could barely support his weight. They had been going at this for hours now.
"A weak dog is dead dog," Dazai said, pulling his gun out from his coat. "And dogs like you, don't deserve to be in the Port Mafia."
You watched as Akutagawa slammed his eyes shut as he gritted his teeth, preparing himself for death.
"STOP!"
You had hugged Dazai from behind, hugging him tightly as you looked up at him with teary eyes. His eyes remained cold as he looked down at you.
"Please...stop. Give the boy a break."
Dazai still looked down at you silently.
"For me, please."
You felt relief wash over you body as you heard Dazai let out a sigh.
"Fine," Dazai said with an annoyed yet defeated look on his face, turning around as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder, throwing the gun in the process. "Don't think I'll be easy on you next time, Akutagawa."
---------------------------
The day Dazai left the Port Mafia is a day that you can never forget.
When he came to your room, he looked tired. Both physically and mentally. He didn't say a word as he sat down next to you on the bed.
After a few moments of silence, he spoke.
"Odasaku is died."
You felt your soul leave your body as those words left his mouth. You had met Oda a few times whenever Dazai would drag you to the bar with him, and he always treated you with kindness. He'd often scold Dazai for his treatment of you, but Dazai always ignored him.
You liked Oda, him and Chuuya made your life a little bit more enjoyable with their kindness.
You stayed silent at Dazai's words. Dazai didn't look like he was here, completely spaced out from the world. You had never seen Dazai like this, and it honestly scared you.
Scooting over next to him, you hesitantly wrapped your arms around his neck.
"Dazai?"
You didn't know if it was grief or what, but you never saw Dazai like this. You didn't know what to do. If you didn't do anything he could punish you once he became stable, or if you did the wrong thing he'd also punish you later. You were lost, you were confused, and you were scared.
"I'm leaving the Port Mafia."
"...What?"
"I'm leaving the Port Mafia," Dazai said before turning to look at you. The emptiness in his eyes sent a chill down your spine. "And you're coming with me."
What happened after that was a blur. All you remember was walking out of the Port Mafia building with a small backpack on, with Dazai holding you hand.
------------------------
The two of you had found an apartment and had been living there for awhile.
After Dazai left the Port Mafia he completely rebranded himself. He seemed so much livelier, so much happier, so much more energetic. You honestly like this new Dazai. You didn't know if if was an act or not, but at least he was treating you better.
One day he came home with a genuine smile on his face.
"Dazai?" You called out as you sat down in front of the TV, watching a show you started but never got finish due to your kidnapping.
"I got a job!" Dazai responded excitingly, sitting down next to on the couch.
"Really? Where?"
"At this detective agency for the gifted."
You were honestly caught off guard. Dazai, a detective? Never in all your days would you think Dazai of all people would help stop crime.
You did your best to hide your confusion though, mostly because you've never seen Dazai so happy. This happiness didn't seem fake, it looked genuine.
"That's nice," You replied, doing your best to put on a smile before going back to your show.
"Guess what I'm thinking, Y/N."
This wasn't going to be good. You just knew it.
"Um, what are you thinking, Dazai?"
"You're getting a job," Dazai said, a smirk on his face as he spoke.
You dropped the bowl of cereal you were eating in complete shock.
"What...?"
"Yeah, I think you should go out more, see new things, make friends, you know, normalcy and things like that."
He was messing with you. This had to be a test. He was testing your loyalty. He wanted to if you'd awnser correctly. The Dazai you know would never tell you this and mean it. Sure he was being a lot nicer now, but this is just like how he first kidnapped you. The calm before the storm.
"Um, no, I'm good," You responded, turning away from Dazai. "I don't wanna, I'm ok."
"...Don't lie to me, Y/N," Dazai said coldly, sending a chill down your spine.
What? You awnsered correctly though.
"W-What?" You asked, turning around to face Dazai.
"I know you want to go out. I know you want to see people again, make friends," Dazai responded as he got closer to you. You didn't dare to back away, but what he said next dazed you. "See your mother again."
You hadn't seen your mother in almost two years.
"You're lying."
"Nope, got her address and everything right here," Dazai said before pulling out a piece of paper.
You immediately leap towards the paper, but Dazai raised it above his head, just out of your reach.
"Nah uh uh, you get this paper if you promise me that you'll go out."
"I promise, I promise, just give me it!"
"Aye, don't be rude," Dazai said, flicking your forehead before handing you the paper.
This had to be a dream. This was way too good to be a dream.
------------------------------
You still can't go out.
The paper with all your mother's information on it haunts you as you sit on the couch, staring at the door as you hug your knees.
You don't know what it is. Dazai's at work most of the time during the day, leaving you alone most of the time. The doors are unlocked, hell, he even gave you a key, but you just can't leave. Everytime you get close to the door you feel your lungs collapse. Your throat closes, you mind gets scattered, you can't think straight.
One time you stuck your foot out and immediately flung into a panic attack. Your breath was short, mind racing. You remember slamming the door shut and crying on the floor until Dazai came home. Anytime you got close to the door, images of your past escapes would flash in your head. Each and every one of them ended with you facing Dazai's torment.
Yeah he left the Port Mafia, but Dazai is still Dazai. This is all one big test to see how much you've learned, the paper was just something to allure you into escaping. You weren't failing this time.
"Still on the couch?" Dazai asked, almost sounding disappointed and worried all at the same time as he sat next to you. "Remember our deal?"
"Take it," You said, your voice and eyes empty as you gave his the crumbled up piece of paper.
Dazai just stared at you as he took the paper. You couldn't tell what he was thinking.
"I passed your test," You continued before lying down on the couch.
Dazai didn't say anything after that. He just stood up and walked away, not even sparing you a glance.
Sitting in your shared bedroom, Dazai stared up at the ceiling as he spoke to himself.
"They’re not leaving willingly anytime soon. I conditioned them too well."
Dazai didn't even notice, but tears were starting to form in his eyes as he spoke.
"They're leaving. They're getting a life."
The next morning you didn't wake up on the couch like you thought, but instead you were sitting on a bench in the center of the city, the paper you gave Dazai in your hand.
"Huh? What? Where... How?" You couldn't even form a coherent sentence as you looked up at the city around you. It was all so overwhelming.
As you walked down the street you kept your head low, trying to balance your nerves as you stared at the address written on the paper. You've waited two whole years for this very moment, a moment you thought you would only be a dream has finally came true.
The apartment your mother had now lived in was far more rundown and ghetto than the last one the two of you shared. The neighborhood was dangerous and the complex was filthy.
As you stood infront of your mother's door, you didn't know what you were going to say to her. Where you going to tell her what happened or just leave her in the dark? You honest weren't sure. Before you could decide what you were going to say, your knuckles were already meeting against wood of the door.
"Hello, can I..."
Standing infront of you was your mother. She looked tired, like she hadn't slept in days. But, the moment your mother locked eyes with you, the two of you were left speechless.
The two of you didn't say a single word as you fell into your mother's arms. You didn't even realize tears were rolling down your face as you hid your head in your shoulder.
"Mama..."
That was all you could say. Your voice was cracking as you hugged your mother tighter, as if she was going to disappear if you didn't.
"Shhh, it's alright," Your mother said gently as she rubbed your back. Even when flooded with overwhelming emotions, your mother was always able to remain composed and calm you down. "What happened baby?"
"I'm sorry mama, I'm sorry I didn’t... I didn't want to leave."
"I know baby, I know."
"I didn't want to leave you mama. I never did. I didn't wanna go, but I couldn't come back."
"Shhhh, calm down, I know, it's ok. Come inside and I'll fix you something, ok?"
Rubbing your eyes, you weakly gave her your response. "Ok."
--------------------------
You never told your mother about Dazai or what truly happened. Anytime you'd get close to telling her, an image of Dazai's face would flash into your head and all those memories would come right back to you.
Your mother had made you your favorite, and at the moment it felt like the world didn't matter. It felt like you were back before everything happened, the time before all the pain, all the trauma, it felt, peaceful. And you couldn't remember the last time you felt true peace.
"What are going to do now?" Your mother asked, sitting down in front of you as you ate.
"I don't know. I need to get a job, but I don't know where to start."
"One of my friends daughters works in one of the stores at the mall, maybe I can get you in contact with them. That'd be nice, right?"
"Maybe."
"Where you living now?"
That question made your blood run cold. She couldn't find out about Dazai. Rebrand or not, Dazai was still Dazai, and you wouldn't let yourself be fooled into thinking otherwise. This wasn't the first time he's pulled something like this, but this time it was going on for a bit too long.
"An apartment downtown. The landlord is letting me live there rent free until I can get back on my feet."
"That's nice."
"Yes," You said before drinking you tea. "It's...nice."
-------------------
"Ah! You're back," Dazai said as he stood up from the couch, making his way to you.
"I'm sorry I'm sorry, I don't what happened but I woke up outside and-"
"Shhhh, I know everything. Was it nice?"
"...No."
"Be honest, Y/N."
"...It was... It was the nicest thing I've gotten in the past two years."
"That's what I thought," Dazai responded before caressing your cheek. "I want you getting out the house more. I won't punish you, I won't hurt you ever again, you have my word Y/N."
You stayed silent. Don't trust him.
"Y/N."
Don't trust him.
"I'm sorry."
Looking up at Dazai, your eyes widened as you saw tears build up in his eyes. Before you knew it, he was holding you tight, hiding his in your shoulder as he spoke.
"You didn't deserve it, you didn't deserve any of it. I love you with all of my heart, I don't know what I'd do without you. I won’t hurt you again, I won't let myself go that far. You are the sweetest person in the world and I corrupted you with my pain. I love you; I'm sorry that I hurt you, and I'll forever be sorry for that, even after I take my final breath."
--------------
It's been a few years since then, and a lot of things have changed. You've gotten a job at the mall and you've became best friends with your co-worker Jojo. The two of you always hang out after work and she's gotten you to go out more. You've made a few new friends but you still get anxious talking to people.
You've met Dazai's co-workers and they all adore you, this kid Atsushi especially. He seems to be Dazai's apprentice and he's always the first one to talk to you whenever you come by the agency.
Ranpo is kinda bratty but he's a really smart guy. You were pretty suprised you found out his age, but you like talking to him about mysteries and his latest jobs. He never fails to suprise you, but he always makes you feel stupid with his arrogance. He's the only one in the ADA that knows about your true history with Dazai, and it was simply by observing your guys' interactions. To the outside the two of you see normal, but Ranpo is able to notice the smallest details that made him figure out the dark history of you and Dazai.
You're pretty sure Kunikida has a crush on you. Any time the two of you talk he's always beet red and gets annoyed whenever Dazai comes along.
You enjoy talking with Kyoka, you're pretty sure she sees you as a big sister. She's always trying to impress you and likes to follow you around. One time you bought a kimono with one of your paychecks and she hugged you so tight that she didn't let go for an hour. For a stone faced child she's truly a sweetheart.
Akiko and you hang out all the time. The two of you often go shopping together and she was the one who explained how abilities worked to you. The two of you were at a bar when she explained it and you quite shocked to say the least. Dazai never explained it to you, it was more like something that was constantly brought up and you had to figure out how it worked on your own.
Now you and Dazai. To say in simple terms, your relationship is complicated. He doesn't hurt you physically, but he still plays mind games with you, but it's just not as obvious. The relationship feels more normal, but his obsessive tendencies still shine through despite his lack of violence. Anytime you go out he always implies that he'll know everything you do. At work, hang out, clubs, everything, he's always watching. So, despite your new found freedom, you're very anxious, and still don't interact with men that Dazai doesn't know. He even met your mother and she adores him. You still do your best to prevent her from finding out the truth about Dazai.
But, if you ignore all of his flaws, Dazai might as well be the perfect boyfriend. He always buys you gifts, takes you on dates, and actually does couple stuff with you. If you ignore the past and that feeling of anxiousness whenever you're with or without Dazai, you would say that you wouldn't ask for anything better.
Right?
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loveanddeepspaceimagines · 4 months ago
Note
Do you think you could do something with the boys and an asthmatic reader? Whether theyre extremely or mildly asthmatic? Been struggling a little bit as the weather changes so I'd love to see your take on it! Thank you!
When you have asthma attack
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I'm so sorry that you are struggling, i hope you feel better soon! wish you well <3
I'm not very familiar on how Asthma works and how it feels to be asthmatic but i tried to put together something for you!
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Rafayel did know you were asthmatic, he just never seen you having Asthma Attack ,so when he found you hunched over on the floor, wheezing and struggling to catch your breath. The sight of you in distress sent a wave of panic through him. He quickly ran to your room to find your inhaler running back to you and knelt next to you. "y/n take a deep breath. Here, use this," he said, pressing the inhaler to your lips.
You took a deep breath, the medicine easing its way into your lungs. Rafayel rubbed your back, trying to help you regain your breath. "It's okay, baby. Just breathe. I'm here," he reassured you.
As your breathing steadied, he helped you to sit up, pulling you in his arms. "Do you want to lay down?" he asked softly, concern on his face.
You nodded, and he scooped you up carrying you to the bedroom. He laid you down gently, covering you with a blanket. He sat on the edge of the bed, watching you, making sure your breathing stayed steady.
He reached for a glass of water, bringing it to your lips. "Drink this," murmured, helping you to sip.
"Do you need anything else?" he asked. You shook your head, a small smile tugging at your lips. "Just you. Thank you for being here, Raf."
Radayel smiled back, his eyes soft. "Anytime, baby. You know I'm always here for you." He leaned down, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead. "Get some rest, and I'll make sure you're feeling better in no time."
⋆。‧˚ʚ ɞ˚‧。⋆
During one of mission with Xavier, you found yourself struggling to breathe, your asthma flaring up unexpectedly. The adrenaline and the chaos around you only made it worse. "Xavier, I can't... I can't breathe," you gasped, your hand moving to your pocket to look for inhaler.
Without hesitation, Xavier pulled your inhaler from your pocket, his hands steady as he helped you to your feet. He guided your hands to position the inhaler correctly, preparing to help you breathe in deeply.
"Take it slow baby," he murmured, his voice shaky but gentle. You followed his lead, inhaling the medication as he held you steady. He wrapped his arm around your waist, supporting you as you took deep breaths.
As your breathing started to even out, he checked your condition, his eyes never leaving yours. "Better?" You nodded, still catching your breath. "Yeah, thanks baby. I'm sorry."
He shook his head, dismissing your apology. "Don't be sorry. I've got you, y/n. We've got this." His hand squeezed yours reassuringly.
He helped you to lean against a wall for support, his free hand still holding your inhaler. He checked on you periodically throughout the mission, ensuring your asthma didn't flare up again.
When the mission was over, and the two of you were safe, Xavier made sure to sit you down and check on you properly. "Are you okay, now? Do you need anything?"
You smiled gratefully at him, his care and protection never failing to send flutter to your heart. "I'm fine, really. Just... thanks for looking out for me."
He returned your smile, his eyes filled with love. "Of course, Y/n. You know I'd do anything for you."
⋆。‧˚ʚ ɞ˚‧。⋆
You two were in the middle of what started as little argument, but quickly escalated due to your poor communication. Your chest tightened, and you gasped for air. The last thing you needed was an asthma attack, especially in such a tense situation.
Sylus noticed your struggle and immediately dropped the argument he was having with you. He moved to your side, his hands cupping your face. "Y/n, you're having an attack. Try to calm down Sweetie" he said, his voice firm yet gentle.
He moved to grab your inhaler from the nearby shelf and handed it to you, his eyes never leaving yours. You took a few puffs, feeling the cold mist soothe your chest. He rubbed your back helping you to relax and focus on your breathing.
"It's okay I'm here" he said, his voice a soft murmur as you tried to regain control over your breathing. "You can let it all out now. I'm not going anywhere."
You took a few more puffs from your inhaler, finally feeling the tightness in your chest loosen. You leaned into Sylus as He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for this to happen," you whispered, feeling tears prick at the corners of your eyes. He held you tighter kissing the top of your head.
"It's not your fault. We'll talk about this later okay? Right now you need to focus on getting better." His voice was calm and reassuring, making it easier for you to let go of the tension that had been building up between you two.
When you felt stable enough you looked up at him, a small smile forming on your lips. "Thank you" you whispered. He smiled back at you, his eyes filled with love, "Anything for you, Sweetie. "
⋆。‧˚ʚ ɞ˚‧。⋆
You were out on a date, enjoying a quiet dinner at a candlelit restaurant. Everything was peace and perfect ,however,season changes wasn't easy for you since you were asthmatic and you were having hard time,dealing with it.
So that's why when you were middle of admiring the view something triggered your asthma, causing your chest to tighten.
Panic flashed across your face, and you fumbled in your bag for your inhaler.
Zayne knew you were asthmatic so he was always ready ,carrying medicine just in case. So when he noticed your distress he quickly took over, pulling out the inhaler from his coat pocket and helped you use it, steadying you as you took deep breaths.
"It's okay, baby, just try to take deep breathes," he said, his voice calm and reassuring. You leaned against him, grateful for his quick reaction. Zayne held you close, waiting for you to stabilize.
Once you felt a bit better, he guided you out of the restaurant, you walked at a slow pace, giving you time to catch your breath. "Do you need to go home?" he asked, his hand gently rubbing your back.
You shook head, "No, I think I'm okay now. I just need a moment." He nodded walking you to a nearby park, finding a quiet corner with a bench. You two sat down, and he held your hand, watching as you took slow, deep breaths. "We can just sit here for a bit, then we can head home if you want," he murmured softly
You smiled, leaning head on his shoulder. "Let's just stay here, I feel safe with you." Zayne wrapped his arm around you, pulling you closer. You sat in silence, the soothing sound of the night filling the air.
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©loveanddeepspaceimagines 2024
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hearts4chriss · 11 months ago
Text
𝐁𝐚𝐛𝐲𝐬𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐲 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝.
𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐃𝐎𝐄'𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐒𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑
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Brothers bestfriend! Chris + needy! Nate’s lil sis
prompt: Nate ( ur older brother ) wants to go out for a bit with some of his other friends and he doesn’t trust you enough to stay home by urself without mom and dad since they won’t be there either. So he asks one of his best friend Chris to stay over and watch you, Matt and nick know ur crush on Chris so they pretend they can’t come.
Part 01
contains: masturbation ( no actual sex ), use of y/n ( sorry I have to ) dirty fantasies ( pet names, rough! Chris, dirty talk, degrading, forced head etc just beyond FILTHLY imagination ), use of vibrator on reader, caught by Chris, FORESHADOWING, fantasy will be like this
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Nate are you serious I’m not 12! I whine when said he was gonna find a baby sitter for me knowing how much it pisses me off
I’m Nate doe’s little sister I’m 18, we’ve Been close to his bestfriends the sturniolo triplets. So obviously him being my brother naturally I got to know them.
Nick
I clicked with him superrr fast, I love his energy and when I found out he was gay that just made it all the better because I’ve always wanted a gay bestfriend, and we always have sleepovers :)
Matt
Matt’s absolutely adorable I love him he always helps me calm down whenever I’m about to or am having a panic attack, I remember one time during a test I forgot everything and almost had one and he slid me the answers. Love that kid
now there’s a reason I saved Chris for last,
Chris
chris and I know each other just as well if not even more then I do his other two brothers, we haven’t done anything unfortunately. I’ve had a crush on him since middle school.
First I just wanted to kiss him and hold his hand.
Then go to his house and do some more.
Then now, as an 18 year old I wanted him to fuck my Brains out.
I’m around him all the time since we all live in LA and always hanging out, I always see him shirtless and fucking hell it turns me on, I always get lucky since nick and matt found of my attraction to his brother they always snap me or text me pictures of him.
What sucks is I cant have him. It would take my life 1000 times over for me to be able to fuck chris sturniolo, and it sucks because my brother nate does not play that shit.
He strictly said "your not allowed to date any of them" obviously referring to matt and Chris.
Which also doesn't help because my wants and desires a hormonal teenage-adult girl only grow more whenever he comes around, chris is always there.
Now today, nate had to run some errands and nick matt and chris used to watch me when I was younger if my parents couldn't
Buttt, nick and matt "could not come due to personal issues" so. Your guess is right, im gonna be alone with chris for hours.
That thought alone made me soak in my p-
“Y/n! are you listening to me kid?” My older brother chuckles leaning against my doorway of my room as im on my bed watching "The Vampire Diaries".
“Huh? oh yeah im listening matt and nick cant come so chris is because im fucking 11.” I roll my eyes hiding my excitement from him watching me.
“Don't think of any weird shit alright? He's just watching you so don't-“
“Ugh is he here yet? You're annoying me already.” I groan shifting in my sheets and taking a sip from my celsius hearin our door open, they have a key.
“Welp thats chris.” Nate says tilting his head for me to get up.
I get up from the sheets wearing some pink sleep shorts and a white t-shirt and he raises an eyebrow.
“Your wearing THAT? around chris?” Nate chuckles and I flip him off.
“Hey! I heard that!.” Chris yells coming up the stairs sounding offended.
He's now at the top of the steps. oh my fuck he looks so good.
Its around 6ish in LA right now and hes wearing a black tank top and grey fresh love sweats, slight stubble and his hair was a bit messy which I always liked and my eyes immediately drifted to his natural bulge in his pants as him and Nate were talking.
“Just make sure she doesn’t get into any trouble.” Nate puts his arm around me giving me a hug and Chris chuckles.
“Don’t worry bro she’s safe with me.” He says before dapping him up as Nate leaves the house. yeah safer if you were balls deep inside
Oh god Chris sh-shit so-d-deep inside me
Yeah? You feel me deep inside you baby?
bro she’s like zoning out today. Nate chuckled and I snap out of it
Whatever no I wasn’t! Just go!
Soon after it was just me and Chris so we made our way down to the living room
“Where are ur other two clones?” I chuckle getting situated on the couch before turning on a movie saltburn
“they have “personal issues”.” He said rolling his eyes causing a small laugh to fall from my lips.
“So it’s just you and me little one.” A smirk curving on his lips, just enough for my panties to be soaked.
Shut up Chris I’m 18.I mutter trying to watch the movie in peace and he chuckles
the movie went on and it was now, the bathtub scene where jacob elordi ( Felix ) is jerking off.
I peer over to Chris whose eyes are clearly fixated on the screen as my squeeze my thighs together under the blanket feeling all my hormonal thoughts leaking through my panties.
This had nothing to do with the movie, it’s the thought for Chris doing that to himself that had turned me on most. The tension so thick a knife couldn’t even cut through.
“Uhm I-i gotta go to the bathroom”. I nearly choke and I fix my shorts placing the blanket down where I was sitting.
“Don’t take to long I’ll miss you.” He chuckles and that didn’t help.
I go to my room and close the door squeezing my eyes shut.
I had maybe 5 minutes to relieve myself.
I quickly reach into my drawer grabbing my vibrating dildo and the remote for it.
I pull down my shorts and panties and spread my legs letting the tip of the toy get coated in my wetness and I bite my lip slightly feeling the thickness of it.
I turned it on letting out a soft moan slowly inserting it, wishing this was Chris’s dick instead.
I began thrusting the toy in and out of my pussy letting the squelching sounds of arousal grow letting it drip down curling my toes throwing my head on the pillows allowing my mind to drift
I was in Chris’s/my room my head smushed in the pillows as his cock rammed inside me whilst I was on my stomach. His hips slamming against my ass and his hand wrapped around my lower stomach as I cried out his name
Fuck fuckk so d-deep- I whimper into the pillows as he was bringing me to my 4th orgasm, we had switched numerous positions and my legs were quivering in front of him as he laid a hard snack to my ass chucking behind me.
such a fucking slut letting me fuck you like this, imagine if ur brother found out his little sister was getting her pussy pounded by his bestfriend. He laid another harsh smack to my ass and I jolted forward.
stretched this pussy out so good- he groans rubbing my clit to chase both our orgasms.
ngh- o-oh shit- fuck- I gripped the sheets tightly curses of Chris’s name flew out my mouth feeling my eyes water from the angle of his hips thrusting allowing his thick cock to hit every single spot inside me
come on sweetheart cum for me, you have another one in you yeah? He grunted lowly in my ear kissing me sloppily as a string of Saliva parts from our lips each time we kiss moaning into each others mouths.
“Oh fuck Chris I-“ I curl my toes and yell loudly as I’m about to release on the toy before I look up and see Chris. Was. Watching me.
“Were you playing with yourself?” Chris leans on the doorway of my room his eyes darting to between ny legs as I was thrusting the toy in and out of me and I quickly covered up my cheeks flush with embarrassment.
“Uhm…maybe. Sorry I-I’ll be down in a second-“
Maybe I can help. Chris says closing the door to my room approaching my bed
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seongwars · 17 days ago
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strangers by nature | v
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Pairing: heir!Song Mingi x heir!Reader AU: non-idol | arranged marriage | enemies to lovers Genre: angst, humor, fluff in future chapters Rating: NC-17 Summary: After a life-altering car accident, Mingi is given one final shot at redemption—reborn as a fuzzy little puppy. To earn a second chance at life, he must complete three tasks or risk being doomed to the afterlife forever. Word Count: 6.4K Warnings: a little angst, mentions of stalking, one swear word, only 50% proofread because of the holidays, panic attack
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a/n: I struggled to write this chapter, but things will definitely be picking up soon! as always feedback is appreciated! i love reading everyone's thoughts!
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The faint jingling of the bell announced your arrival as you stepped into the cozy coffee shop. Mingi trotted in behind you, his tiny paws clicking against the tiled floor. Heads turned almost immediately, and the quiet murmur of conversation gave way to coos and giggles.
“Look at that dog!”
“He’s so cute!”
Mingi puffed up his chest, his little tail wagging in satisfaction as he soaked in the admiration. His tail wagged in satisfaction, a clear sign that he was enjoying the attention. Someone nearby pulled out their phone, angling for a picture, while another patron whispered to their friend about how much he resembled a fluffy toy.
Despite his tiny form, he still had his ego intact. He strutted a few steps ahead of you, taking in the praise from others. 
“I’ll get us something quick,” you muttered to him, scratching behind his ears. He gave a soft huff, clearly not impressed with the idea of waiting, especially when a cup of whip cream was to be had. 
You straightened and made your way to the counter, your eyes scanning the menu overhead. Behind you, Mingi entertained his growing fan club, a gaggle of customers marveling at his antics as you stepped aside to wait for your order. 
“Y/N?”
Turning, you were greeted by the sight of Park Seonghwa standing near the condiment bar, a takeaway cup in one hand and the other tucked into his pocket. It was rare to see the heir to Park Enterprises out and about like this, given his reputation for being both elusive and endlessly busy. That fact that he was here at all felt oddly serendipitous.
“Hey, Seonghwa.”
His smile widened slightly, and he took a step closer. “Fancy running into you here.”
“Yeah, I’m on the way to the hospital to stay with Mingi. Just stopping by to grab coffee before heading over.”
As if on cue, Maro let out a sharp bark, turning Seonghwa’s attention downward. His brows lifted in surprise and delight as he took in the tiny, proud pup sitting at your feet.
“Mingi let you have a dog?”
The question caught you off guard, and you hesitated. “Well... not exactly,” you admitted, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. 
“It’s...complicated.”
“Complicated, huh?”
Still, the thought lingered in your mind: would you have to give up your puppy once Mingi woke up? Maro had simply happened, and now you couldn’t imagine not having him around.
“I found him,” you blurted. “Or, I guess, he found me.”
Seonghwa’s gaze lingered on Maro, his expression softening slightly before he returned his attention to you. 
“Knowing Mingi,” he said carefully, “I can’t imagine he’d be thrilled about this.”
You laughed, though it came out a little strained. “Yeah, well, he doesn’t exactly have a say right now.”
The humor in the moment dissipated almost immediately. Seonghwa’s teasing expression softened, giving way to something more serious. 
“How is he?” he asked quietly.
“The same,” you admitted. “No changes yet.”
“I’m sorry,” he said softly, his voice so low it barely reached you over the hum of the coffee shop. “I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now.”
You nodded, lips pressing into a tight line as you fought the sudden swell of emotion in your chest. 
“If you need company at the hospital,” he offered, “just let me know.”
Now hold on! Mingi growled, his tiny body stiffening. His big brown eyes locked onto Seonghwa, narrowing as much as his puppy face would allow. Park Seonghwa, for all his charm was still Park Seonghwa, a man with a reputation whose commitment issues rivaled Mingi’s own. 
You glanced up at him, managing to raise an eyebrow as you struggled to muster a semblance of a smile. His offer, so simple yet so unexpectedly kind, caught you off guard.
“Is it because your family owns Hala Medical?”
“Maybe,” he replied, his tone playful as though he could sense you needed the levity.
Mingi didn’t care how successful Seonghwa’s family was in healthcare, or how much he was trying to play the concerned friend right now. He wasn’t going to let him swoop in with his perfect hair, stupid face, and infuriatingly genuine smile to worm his way into your life while he was stuck in a coma, unable to defend himself.
And you’re a married woman! If Seonghwa thought he could charm his way past that little detail, Mingi was more than ready to remind him otherwise. The puppy let out another indignant bark. You shot him a quick look, tilting your head in confusion. 
“What’s with you?” you muttered softly, rubbing his back in an attempt to soothe him.
Mingi growled louder this time, his tiny body practically vibrating with the effort. Did Seonghwa think he was fooling anyone? Mingi was onto him, and he wasn’t going to let the infamous Park Seonghwa forget that you were spoken for.
“Don’t mind him,” you said with a sheepish laugh, shifting Mingi in your arms. “He gets like this sometimes. It’s all that puppy energy.”
Seonghwa raised a brow, his lips twitching with amusement as he leaned slightly closer. “Protective, huh?” he remarked, his tone light. 
“Guess he has good instincts.”
Of course I do! Mingi thought, puffing out his little chest. If he’d had hands instead of paws, he’d have already swung on Seonghwa for good measure. A man like Seonghwa didn’t just casually offer to visit hospitals out of the goodness of his heart. No, he had an angle, and Mingi was determined to sniff it out.
Still, you were oblivious to the growing tension between the two males. “I should grab my order,” you said, glancing toward the counter and adjusting your grip on Mingi. 
“I need to get there before visiting hours are over.”
Seonghwa nodded, stepping aside with a gracious smile. “Of course. Don’t let me keep you.”
Mingi let out another low growl, shooting one last withering glare at Seonghwa as you turned your attention back to the counter. As far as the pomeranian was concerned, this wasn’t over. 
Yeosang’s car rolled to a stop in front of the hospital. As soon as the door opened, Mingi’s tiny legs worked furiously as he darted toward Yeosang, his fluffy tail wagging so hard it looked like he might fly away.
“Hey buddy,” Yeosang chuckled, scratching behind Mingi’s ears before scooping him up. “You ready for another sleepover?”
Hetmon barked from the backseat, his paws resting on the window. Let’s go already!
“Thanks so much for meeting me here! Sorry today’s drop off is a little out of the ordinary,” you said, handing Yeosang a bag of baked goods from the coffee shop.
“No worries. It actually works out great! Having the park between my apartment and the hospital is pretty convenient. I told Hetmon we’d stop by and let him and Maro run around before heading home.”
“You’re a lifesaver, I can’t thank you enough. Hetmon is more than welcome to stay with us whenever he’d like.”
“Careful, he might take you up on that offer and never want to come home.”
Laughing, you bent down to give Mingi a kiss between his fluffy ears. “Be good for Uncle Yeosang, okay?” Mingi gave an enthusiastic bark in response, his tail wagging so furiously it made his whole body wiggle.
“Thanks again. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
With a final wave, you turned and headed toward the hospital, glancing back once to see Maro already pawing at Yeosang’s leg, eager to get going.
Once they reached the dog park, Mingi wasted no time. The moment Yeosang unclipped his leash, the little pomeranian shot off like a rocket. He barked gleefully, weaving through the open field with such speed that even larger dogs stopped to watch in astonishment.
Hetmon trotted after him at a more measured pace, as if he knew Mingi would wear himself out eventually. Finally, the puppy skidded to a stop under the shade of a tree, panting dramatically as the doberman joined him, settling down onto the grass with a huff. But before Hetmon could catch his breath, Mingi launched into a tirade.
“So, get this,” Mingi began, his tiny voice surprisingly serious despite the constant wagging of his tail. He paced in front of Hetmon, his little legs moving with purpose. 
“There’s this guy. His name is Seonghwa, and he was hitting on Y/N at the coffee shop.”
Hetmon tilted his head, his ears perking up. “Seonghwa? Who’s that?”
“He’s not important,” Mingi snapped, spinning around dramatically. “What’s important is that he thinks he can just charm his way into Y/N’s heart.”
“Well, if he’s not important, why are we talking about him?”
“Because!” Mingi barked, “He’s literally perfect and I don’t want Y/N to replace me! She’s my wife and I… I…”
His voice faltered, the words catching in his throat as if saying them aloud might make them too real. His paws stilled mid-step, and he froze, staring down at the ground.
Love her.
Was this love really his? Or was it just some puppy instinct to adore the person who cared for him?
He thought of the way you’d let him curl up in bed with you, ignoring how much space his small, fluffy frame somehow managed to take up. You always tucked the blankets around him, murmuring something soft and sweet. He felt safe there, pressed close to you, as though nothing could hurt him as long as he was with you.
He thought about how you scratched behind his ears, those tender moments when he’d rest his head on your lap. You’d tell him, you love him and each time, he could feel it in your voice, in your touch. It wasn’t just words. 
You meant it.
You didn’t just care for him. You saw him. You saw past all his flaws–his arrogance, his pride, and you still stayed. Even as he was in a coma, you chose him. 
And if that wasn’t love, what was?
“I don’t want to lose her,” Mingi admitted, his voice trembling. 
He sank onto his haunches, his tail lying limp against the ground. Yet, the act of speaking them aloud released something within him. It was like stepping into the sun after years of darkness. 
It wasn’t just the loyalty of a pet. It wasn’t just some fleeting puppy affection. It was real. He loved you. 
But love, he realized bitterly, came with its own demons. It came with fear, sharp and gnawing. The fear that you’d leave him. The fear that one day, you’d look at him and realize you deserved better.
Mingi's chest tightened, his breaths coming out in short, shallow huffs. What if you already realized it? What if the only thing keeping you by his side was pity? That thought was unbearable. 
His tail gave a tentative wag, hesitant at first but growing stronger as he allowed himself to lean into the feeling. It wasn’t just relief. It was hope.
“I love her,” he declared, this time with a small smile. 
“Aww, look who’s grown a heart.”
Mingi’s ears perked up, and he whirled around to see Wooyoung perched on a low-hanging branch, his black tail swishing lazily. The cat’s eyes twinkled with amusement, his signature smirk in place. 
“It’s the cat!” Hetmon barked excitedly, bounding over to the tree with his tail wagging furiously. He let out another bark, practically vibrating with energy as Wooyoung hopped down from the branch. 
“What are you doing here?” Mingi narrowed his eyes to gaze at the Judge. 
“Am I not allowed to congratulate you? You’re knocking these tasks out in record time” he drawled, arching his spine and flexing his claws. “Touching confession, by the way.”
Mingi puffed up, his fur fluffing indignantly. “What do you want?”
Wooyoung stood, brushing imaginary dust off his shoulder with his paw. “I came to remind you that there’s more work to be done. The little girl? That was only task two. Don’t get too comfortable.”
Mingi scowled, his fluffy tail flicking in irritation. “I know that. You don’t need to remind me.”
“But it’s so entertaining,” Wooyoung shot back, his grin widening mischievously. 
“Watching our little hero overcome life’s obstacles for love.”
Then, to Mingi’s surprise, Wooyoung’s expression softened, his usual smirk giving way to something quieter and more thoughtful. 
“Look,” he said, his voice dropping to something almost gentle, “you did well.”
Mingi blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift in Wooyoung’s demeanor.  
“You’ve got more heart than you give yourself credit for. You’re capable of putting someone else’s needs before your own. That you can be selfless when it matters.”
Selfless. That wasn’t a word he’d ever used to describe himself. In his human life, everything had been about him: his ambitions, his comforts, his endless need for validation. If something didn’t serve his desires, he’d ignored it, or worse, pushed it away.
He had been selfish. He could see that now, clear as day, and the realization stung. He’d hurt people—hurt you. He’d dismissed your efforts, neglected your feelings, and then, when things fell apart, he had blamed you. 
“Why are you telling me this?” Mingi asked finally, his voice quieter than he intended.
“Because, as much as I enjoy giving you a hard time, I’d rather see you win. For her, but also for you.”
For a moment, Mingi didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t used to this side of Wooyoung—supportive, almost kind. It threw him off balance, but at the same time, it felt…good.
He swore he’d work harder, not just to make things right, but to make you happy. This wasn’t just about earning back his humanity, it was about earning back your trust, your happiness, and maybe, if he was lucky, your forgiveness.
“Hetmon! Maro! Let’s go home!” 
Clutching their leashes in hand, Yeosang hurried toward the dogs, crouching down to clip the leashes onto their harnesses. As they started toward the park’s exit, Yeosang cast one last glance over his shoulder, his jaw tightening. 
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“Excuse me?”
Yeosang turned, his usually calm expression darkening as he took in the middle-aged woman approaching him. Her clothes were simple and unremarkable, but her presence carried an unsettling air. Her eyes gleamed with a mix of desperation and misplaced affection that made Yeosang’s skin crawl.
“Can I help you?” he asked flatly, keeping his tone polite but distant.
“C-Can you tell me more about that dog?” she asked, pointing to Mingi. Her voice quivered, but it wasn’t the kind of nervousness Yeosang could dismiss as harmless. It felt...like she was trying too hard to seem unassuming.
“He’s just a pomeranian.”
“Oh, it’s just...he’s so unique.” 
Her smile was tight, forced, and her hands fidgeted restlessly at her sides. “I couldn’t help but notice him. Where did you get him? He’s not from around here, is he?”
Yeosang stiffened, his instincts screaming at him to end the conversation. “I can ask his owner for more information, but—”
“Owner?” she interrupted, her eyes widening slightly. “Oh, so he’s not yours?” She took a step closer, her gaze fixed intently on Mingi. 
“No, but I’m sure you can find a pomeranian for adoption if you reach out to your local shelter.”
But the woman didn’t seem to hear him. Her eyes gleamed with an unsettling intensity, and her smile grew wider, almost manic. 
“What about the girl?”
Yeosang’s eyes narrowed. “What girl?”
“The one who owns him,” the woman said, her gaze shifting between Yeosang and Mingi. Her expression softened into something disturbingly wistful.  
“My daughter.”
Yeosang froze, his heart thudding in his chest. “Your daughter?” he echoed, his voice flat and cold, masking the unease creeping up his spine.
The woman nodded, her smile growing wider but no less unsettling. “She’s grown into such a lovely young woman, hasn’t she?”
Yeosang’s grip on the leashes tightened, as he scanned his surroundings for any sign of Hetmon and Mingi. The two were playing under a tree, which was a relief. He took a deliberate step back, placing himself between the woman and the dogs. 
“That’s none of your business,” he said sharply.
But the woman didn’t seem to notice his hostility—or chose to ignore it. “Is she married? Does she live nearby? Does she walk the dogs often?”
Yeosang felt his patience snap. His usually calm demeanor was replaced by a simmering anger. Who was this woman?
“Listen to me. You’re asking invasive, inappropriate questions about someone you don’t know. That’s not curiosity, that’s stalking.”
The woman’s smile faltered but she quickly recovered, her expression twisting into something defensive. 
“I didn’t mean any harm,” she replied, though her tone lacked sincerity. “I just wanted to know more about my daughter. I haven’t seen her in over twenty years ever since her father took her away from me!” Her voice rose on the last part, as if she were struggling to contain an outburst. 
“I don’t know what your problem is, but if I ever see you here again, or if you go anywhere near…your daughter, I won’t be this polite.”
For a moment, there was silence. Her hands trembled slightly, and her breath quickened, but she didn’t speak. Instead, her gaze flickered over to the dogs, then back to Yeosang. With a sharp exhale, she finally turned on her heel, her movements stiff with rage. She stalked off, muttering under her breath, her words inaudible but tinged with frustration.
He watched her retreat, his eyes following her until she was out of sight, and only then did he allow himself to relax slightly. Clutching their leashes in hand, Yeosang hurried toward the dogs, crouching down to clip the leashes onto their harnesses. 
“Hetmon! Maro! Let’s go home!” 
Yeosang kept his eyes scanning the park’s perimeter, making sure the woman didn’t return. His thoughts kept circling back to her, the way she’d spoken about you, referring to you as her daughter. 
He shook his head, trying to push the unsettling thoughts away but the voice in the back of his head kept telling him that you were in trouble. Gripping the leashes a little tighter, Yeosang quickened his pace, the dogs trotting happily at his side as he rushed home. He had to let you know that something was amiss and that you were possibly in danger. 
You sighed, stretching your stiff muscles as you laid on the sofa. It had been about a month and a half since Mingi’s accident, and the doctors still hadn’t seen any improvement in his condition. The days blurred together–you’d get up, take Maro out, feed him, get ready for your day, check in on the foundation, before contemplating your existence. 
The sofa you’d claimed as your makeshift bed creaked faintly as you shifted, trying to find a comfortable position. You pulled the blanket tighter around yourself, though it did little to chase away the cold.
“Found you.”
The voice broke the silence, and you startled, jerking upright as your heart raced. Blinking against the dim light of the hallway, your eyes landed on a figure standing a few feet away.
“Seonghwa?”  
His dark suit was impeccably tailored, his shoes polished to a mirror shine, and his hair so flawlessly styled that you doubted anything about him had ever been out of place. Even now, standing in the dim, unflattering light of the hospital, he looked more suited for the cover of a magazine than the depressing private suite of your comatose husband. Park Seonghwa and his stupidly perfect face and personality, everyone would say. 
“What are you doing here?” you asked, your voice still low, more out of habit than necessity.
“I had a meeting with the board,” he said, stepping into the room as if this were the most natural thing in the world.
“At 9 at night?” you asked, eyebrows raising in disbelief.
“Hospital boards don’t keep regular hours,” he replied easily, a faint smile tugging at the corner of his lips. 
You frowned, pulling your blanket tighter around yourself. “I didn’t think hospitals held board meetings this late.”
“They usually don’t,” he admitted, taking another step closer. “But some discussions can’t wait.” His gaze swept over the room, lingering briefly on the sofa before settling back on you. 
“And what about you? Shouldn’t you be at home? Or at least in an actual bed?”
“I told you,” you muttered, shifting uncomfortably under his gaze. “I’m staying with Mingi.”
His expression softened, though the concern in his eyes remained. “You’ve been staying here for weeks, haven’t you?”
“Isn’t that a violation of patient privacy?” you shot back, crossing your arms defensively.
Seonghwa’s lips twitched into the faintest smirk. “First, you’re not a patient. Secondly, news spreads fast when your mother-in-law is…your mother-in-law.”
The mention of her made your jaw tighten instinctively, your grip on the blanket pulling it tighter around you like a shield. You didn’t want to sound ungrateful, she cared in her own way, you supposed. But it was hard not to feel resentment every time you were left to sit by Mingi’s side alone, her absence a glaring reminder of how much he’d been left to you to shoulder.
“I just don’t like the idea of him being left alone.”
“Running yourself into the ground won’t help Mingi. If anything, it’ll make things harder for him, and for you.”
You opened your mouth to argue, but he held up a hand, stopping you.
“Humor me,” he said. “When was the last time you did something for yourself?”
You hesitated. You opened your mouth again, searching for a reply—something to prove him wrong—but the words wouldn’t come. Because the truth was…you couldn’t remember.
When was the last time you did something for yourself? Getting coffee with Jiwoo and Jongho didn’t count. The same thing goes with taking Maro out for a walk or hanging out with Yeosang and Hetmon. No, those moments weren’t for you. They were distractions at best, small glimpses of normalcy in the chaos, but they hadn’t been about you.
“That’s what I thought,” he said, his voice softer now. He straightened, motioning toward the door. 
“Come on.”
“Come on where?” 
“For a walk,” he said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
“In the middle of the night? In a hospital?”
“My family owns the hospital,” he said, glancing over his shoulder with a faint smirk. “And you need fresh air.”
You stared at him. For a moment, you contemplated saying no, coming up with an excuse to stay planted on the sofa in the darkness of the suite. But the weight of his gaze and his stupid handsome face left little room for argument. 
“Fifteen minutes,” he added softly. “That’s all I’m asking.”
The courtyard was quiet, save for the faint rustling of leaves in the breeze and the distant hum of city life. He walked beside you at a leisurely pace, his hands in his pockets, giving you room to gather your thoughts.  
“So,” he said finally, “How are you?”
You blinked, glancing at him. “What?”
He turned his head slightly to meet your gaze. “How are you doing?” he repeated.
The question caught you off guard. Not because it was strange or unwelcome, but because it had been so long since anyone had asked you that. Really asked. 
“I’m fine,” you replied, the words tumbling out before you could stop them.
“Try again.”
You frowned, shoving your hands into the pockets of your jacket. “I said I’m fine,” you repeated, your tone sharper now.
His lips quirked at the corners, but it wasn’t quite a smile. “And I said try again.”
Your frustration flared, but before it could boil over, Seonghwa leaned back against the edge of the fountain, crossing his arms. He took a moment to study you. You were always a little strange, he thought, but not in a bad way. It was in a way that made you stand out amongst the world of the elite. 
You lived in a world of sharp edges, where power was everything, and kindness was a weakness waiting to be exploited. Yet, amidst the cutthroat games of high society, you wore your heart plainly. Somehow, you remained standing, untouched by the corrosive allure of wealth and status. It wasn’t rebellion that set you apart, it was something gentler, something more enduring.
Seonghwa had always admired this about you, even from afar, catching glimpses through the whispers of your peers.
His voice was softer when he spoke again. “You don’t have to tell me everything,” he said. “But don’t lie to me either. You’re not fine.”
You opened your mouth to argue, but the words were caught in your throat. Instead, you sighed in response, stuffing your hands deeper into the pockets of your jacket. Seonghwa didn’t push, though his gaze lingered for a moment longer before he glanced away.
“So,” he said, breaking the silence again, this time with a lighter tone. “What’s the plan when Mingi wakes up?”
“I haven’t thought about it,” you admitted quietly. “I’m just…focusing on what’s in front of me right now.”
“You’re running yourself ragged for someone who might not do the same for you.”
“Doesn’t mean I can’t have empathy for him.”
Seonghwa let out a low hum, his expression thoughtful. “No,” he agreed, his voice almost a murmur. “It doesn’t. But you’re allowed to have empathy for yourself too.”
“You’re too good for our world,” he added. When your eyes flicked to his, he gave you a small, almost wistful smile. 
“You don’t belong in all this chaos, Y/N. You’ve always been…strange.” 
“I get that alot,” you scoffed. “You’re not the first one to point that out.”
“Yeah,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “Because people like you get hurt the most in a world like this.”
You turned to look at him, startled by how sincere he was. For a moment, you didn’t know what to say, your arsenal of witty comebacks failing you. Seonghwa wasn't pitying you nor was he being condescending. He was acknowledging you, comforting you. Reminding you that compassion was a strength and it was something you were worthy of receiving, too.
“Is this…” you started, trying to mask the slight tremor in your voice with a teasing tone, “is this part of that charm you’re so infamous for?”
Seonghwa’s lips curved into a slow, knowing smile. “Infamous?” he echoed, raising an eyebrow.
“Yeah,” you said, forcing a smirk and crossing your arms over your chest to regain some sense of control. 
“Your reputation almost rivals Mingi’s.” You hesitated, your voice dipping just slightly as you added, “but, you know, with fewer tantrums.”
“Fewer tantrums, huh? Should I take that as a compliment or an insult?”
You shrugged, feigning indifference, though the teasing glint in his eyes made it harder to keep a straight face. 
“Take it however you want,” you replied lightly.
“I’ll keep that in mind,” he said, his grin softening as his tone shifted. “But seriously, you know I’m always around, if you need someone. I mean it.”
You instinctively raised your hand, wiggling your fingers to display your wedding ring. “I’m a married woman.”
“Take it however you want,” he teased, throwing your own words back at you with a wink. “But the offer stands.”
You stared at him, momentarily stunned. Was he genuinely offering support? Or was he trying to make a move on you? Before you could figure out how to respond, the shrill ring of your phone caught you off guard.
Your gaze dropped to the screen, where Yeosang’s name lit up. Grateful for the interruption, you glanced back at Seonghwa with a small, apologetic smile. “Sorry, I have to take this.”
He nodded, leaning back with an easygoing shrug, though his eyes lingered on you for a moment longer.
“Hey Yeosang.”
“Hey! How’s the hospital?”
“Same old,” you replied with a sigh. “Nothing’s really changed with Mingi.”
“Sorry to hear that,” he said, and you could feel the genuine sympathy in his voice. “Maro and Hetmon are all tucked in and asleep in the fort, but I wanted to ask you something.”
“Sure, what’s this about?” you asked, your posture straightening as a flicker of worry crept in.
Yeosang hesitated for a moment before continuing. “Your mother…is Kim Youngji, right? Former Jinhit heiress?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t she be?”
“Well…” Yeosang’s voice lowered, and you could hear the tension creeping in. “There was this strange woman at the park asking questions about Maro like where you got him and whatnot. At first, I thought she was just a dog lover, you know? Interested in him because he’s such a unique breed or something. But then…”
“Then what?” you pressed.
“She started asking about you,” Yeosang said, his voice laced with unease. “And not in a casual way. She was way too specific, Y/N. She claimed you were her daughter.”
“What!?” you exclaimed, your voice rising in disbelief. The absurdity of his words collided with a chilling sense of unease. You looked over to Seonghwa, who had stepped closer, his brow furrowed with concern. 
“She kept pressing,” Yeosang continued, his frustration clear in the clipped tone of his voice. “Her questions got more invasive. She asked if you were married, if you lived nearby, if you were the one who walked Maro most of the time. And then…” He paused, his voice dropping lower. 
“Then she said your dad took you away from her. Like she was claiming he took you away in a custody battle.”
Your heart sank further, a cold knot forming in your stomach. “She said that?”
“Yeah. That’s when I lost my shit. I told her to get lost, grabbed the dogs, and got out of there as fast as I could. But…I have a bad feeling about this, Y/N.”
Your grip on the phone tightened, and you felt Seonghwa’s gaze on you. He didn’t say anything, but the slight tilt of his head reminded you that he was there if you needed him. 
“Thanks for letting me know,” you said finally, trying to keep your voice steady. “I’ll…I’ll talk to my mom about it. Maybe she’ll have some idea of who this woman is.”
“That’s probably a good idea,” Yeosang agreed, though his tone remained cautious. “But be careful, okay? Whoever she is, she didn’t seem stable. Take your time with pick up tomorrow.”
“I appreciate that,” you said quietly, “Thanks for looking out for the puppies.”
The call ended, leaving a tense silence in its wake. You lowered the phone, exhaling a shaky breath as you tried to process what you’d just heard. The threat felt closer now, less like a shadow lurking in the background and more like a storm rolling toward you.
“Everything okay?” Seonghwa asked. 
“Yeah…It’s getting late, I should head back.”
Turning on your heel, you made your way back toward the suite, your steps slower now, the conversation playing on a loop in your head. Every shadow seemed sharper, every sound amplified. You tried to focus on the steady rhythm of your breathing, but the sound of Yeosang’s voice wouldn’t leave you.
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“Maro! My baby!” you cooed as Mingi bounded toward you. You scooped him up, burying your face in his fur as his excited yips filled the air.
Yeosang stood nearby, a faint smile softening the tension on his face. He held onto Hetmon’s leash, but his gaze kept darting toward the park’s edges, his encounter the day before still fresh. 
“How was he?” you asked, squishing a very happy Mingi against your face. 
“An angel as always,” Yeosang chuckled, scratching the Hetmon between the ears. 
You smiled, but the way his attention flickered nervously to the surrounding trees didn’t escape you. Setting Maro back on the ground, you straightened up, crossing your arms. “What’s wrong? You’ve been on edge since I got here.”
“Just making sure she isn’t lurking around,” Yeosang said, his tone low and cautious. 
“I think she knows more about you than she let on. When she saw Maro yesterday, she called you ‘the girl who owns him.’” He paused, glancing at Maro, who was sniffing the grass. 
“She’s seen him before—maybe even followed you.”
“What did she look like?” you asked. 
“Maybe… mid-forties? Dark hair, pulled back into a ponytail. She had a dark coat, but it wasn’t even that cold yesterday.” He hesitated, his jaw tightening as he recalled the encounter. “And her eyes… She had this deranged look, like she was completely convinced of whatever twisted story she’s telling herself.”
A shiver ran down your spine. You crouched beside Maro, stroking his fur absentmindedly as you tried to process Yeosang’s words. You tried to recall where you’ve seen or heard that description before. But you couldn’t quite figure out where. 
Mingi lifted his head, his nose twitching as an unusual scent wafted through the park. His tail stilled, and his ears perked up, alert to the approaching presence. 
There was a hint of coffee, Black Opium, the faintest whiff of ink and…multiple affairs. The pomeranian’s eyes narrowed, his small body tense as a low growl rumbled from his chest. His gaze snapped to the pathway ahead, where a figure was approaching, and his growls turned to a sharp bark.
You glanced down at him in confusion. “Maro?” you asked, crouching to stroke his head.
Mingi’s growl softened slightly at your touch, but he stayed on high alert, his fluffy frame taut with suspicion. He sniffed the air again as Seonghwa came into view, his presence impossible to ignore.
“Seonghwa?” you said, surprised, turning to find him approaching you and Yeosang. “What are you doing here?”
How convenient Mingi thought bitterly, his gaze never leaving the man. His barks grew more insistent, clearly directed at Seonghwa now.
“Just on my way to grab coffee. Hospital coffee isn’t exactly the best,” Seonghwa explained casually, though his attention drifted to Mingi, who looked seconds away from launching himself at him.
“I see someone’s still not a fan,” he quipped.
“Sorry about that,” you muttered, crouching again to pick up Mingi. “He’s usually so well-behaved.”
Mingi huffed indignantly in your arms, clearly disagreeing with your assessment. Meanwhile, Hetmon, who had been lounging nearby suddenly perked up. His ears twitched, and his nose wriggled as if catching a scent in the air.
Oh no, Maro’s upset, I can feel it. Seonghwa? Is that Seonghwa? The one who was trying to hit on Y/N? The one who almost took her away from Maro? When my friends are upset, it’s my job to help. That’s what I do, I help. Because I’m a good friend!
Time seemed to slow as Hetmon sprung forward, charging toward his unsuspecting target, his powerful frame sending Seonghwa stumbling backward. The man’s eyes widened in surprise as he fell, the force of the impact knocking him off balance. A muffled thud followed as Seonghwa hit the ground, his suit jacket crumpling beneath him. Hetmon stood triumphantly on his chest, barking loudly in satisfaction.
“Hetmon, get off of him!” Yeosang rushed forward, his laid back demeanor replaced by outright horror at the sight of his usually gentle dog standing on Seonghwa’s chest, unrepentant.
“I’m so sorry,” he said, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment as he grabbed Hetmon’s harness. “I have no idea what got into him. He’s never done anything like this before.”
A few steps away, Mingi wiggled out of your arms and trotted over to the scene. His tail wagged furiously, his eyes glinting with smug satisfaction as he gave a sharp, triumphant bark. It was clear he approved of Hetmon’s intervention.
You stepped forward to help Seonghwa, stifling a laugh at the absurdity of the situation. Behind you, Hetmon and Mingi sat like a united front of mischief, but your smile faltered as an icy sensation crawled down your spine. The air felt heavy, like an unseen gaze pressing watching you, and your chest tightened as your thoughts scattered.
Mingi’s ears flicked and let out an uneasy bark. He sensed it too—something was off.
“I should probably get going,” you said abruptly, your voice wavering despite your best efforts to steady it. 
Both Seonghwa and Yeosang turned to you, concern etched across their faces, but you avoided their eyes, focusing instead on scooping up Mingi. Your legs felt unsteady, each step toward the park’s exit requiring more effort than the last.
“Y/N! Wait, is everything okay?” Seonghwa called after you.
You glanced back just long enough to nod, offering a weak, unconvincing smile before hurrying away. The icy sensation prickling at the back of your neck refused to dissipate, no matter how much distance you put between yourself and the park.
When you reached your car, your hands fumbled with the keys, dropping them twice before you finally managed to unlock the door. You slid inside, slamming it shut and locking it with trembling fingers.
Tears blurred your vision as you struggled to calm yourself, gripping the steering wheel tightly in a futile attempt to ground yourself. Mingi whined softly, climbing into your lap and pressing a paw to your chest. His warm, steady presence was a quiet reminder to breathe, to focus. You closed your eyes, taking shaky, uneven breaths, trying to mimic the calm he radiated.
“Just breathe,” you whispered to yourself, though it sounded more like a plea than a command. Breathe. 
Mingi’s paw stayed firmly on your chest, nuzzling against your chin. If he could, he’d wrap you in his arms and take away all the fear and panic that had overtaken you. He hated seeing you like this, scared, fragile, and hurting, and he wanted to do more. He needed to do more to make sure he could shield you from the world. 
The tears came slower now, the overwhelming panic easing into a dull ache in your chest. You rested your forehead against Mingi’s, whispering a soft, broken “thank you.” He nudged you, promising that he wouldn’t let anything harm you, not while he was by your side.
You closed your eyes and leaned back against the seat, still stroking his fur as he rested against you. “Let’s go home,” you murmured softly, smiling down at your puppy. Mingi’s tail wagged and his ears perked up at your words.
Yeah, let’s go home.
<< iv | vi >>
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makeitmingi · 2 months ago
Text
When Flowers Bloom In The Dark [Chapter 7]
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Genre: Romance, Mafia!AU, Violence, Angst, Slow burn
Pairing: Hongjoong x Reader (y/n)
Characters: Florist!Reader, Mafioso!Hongjoong, Mafioso!Seonghwa, Mafioso!Yunho, Mafioso!Yeosang, Mafioso!San, Mafioso!Mingi, Mafioso!Wooyoung, Mafioso!Jongho
Summary: When you appeared and wept at his mother's funeral, Hongjoong found himself wanting to find out more about you. A regular girl, who owns a flower shop in his territory and has a relationship with the mother that he hasn't spoken to in years, why hasn't he ever noticed you before?
[Warning(s): 18+ for violence, use of weapons, smoking, alcohol consumption, slight gore, gang affiliation, tattoos and character deaths. Minors DNI. This is a work of fiction and does not represent the Ateez members in real life.]
Word count: 3.2K
Chapter warning(s): Y/n gets accosted twice, "panic" attack (she shuts down)
"Oh! Sorry, I thought you were someone else, you sounded like him." You blinked at the stranger. The guy laughed and shook his head, a drink in his hand. Between him and the bar counter, you suddenly felt very cornered and uncomfortable.
"I was wondering if I could buy you a drink?" He asked with a smile.
"No, thank you. I bought my own drink." You shook your glass with your drink, trying to slink away but with so many people crowding the bar, it was difficult.
"Ah, looks like I was too slow then. Can I at least have a drink with you then?" He laughed, trying to be nice.
"I really should be getting back to my friends. They are looking for me." You tried to go past him but he grasped your wrist tightly.
"You know, I tried being nice. It's not nice to be so unfriendly in a place like this." He chided, his tone suddenly changing. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"Do you expect me to be honoured then? Doesn't mean you make advances means I have to accept them." You couldn't bite your tongue.
"You-" He was about to say something.
"(y/n), I've been looking for you." Now it was a familiar voice. You turned to Jihoon with a soft sigh of relief. Jihoon immediately wrapped his arm around you, pulling you to his side, glowering at the man who had let your wrist go. Looking up, you saw Hyunwoo standing there too.
"Got a problem here?" Hyunwoo raised an eyebrow. With his muscles, it was normal for the guy to be intimidated by him. You merely looked away, not saying anything.
"Let's go." Jihoon threw a last dirty look at the guy and escorted you back to the table.
"Are you okay?" He looked down at you with a frown.
"I'm fine, Jihoon. Don't worry, you and Hyunwoo came at the right time. Thank you." You smiled softly. He nodded with a hum and you went to sit down.
"I'm going to find Nana and Eve. We should go." Hyunwoo said, leaving before you could protest.
"No, it's fine! You guys should stay and enjoy yourselves. I think I'll go home." You told Jihoon, you felt bad that they had to leave.
"You shouldn't leave on your own. I'll take you home." Jihoon shook his head.
"The exit is just there. Really, I'll be okay, I'm sober to make it home on my own. Make sure Nana and Eve get home safely, hmm?" You squeezed his hand. Jihoon knew you were stubborn and reluctantly agreed. You wrapped an arm around him to hug him.
"Text me when you get home." He whispered.
"I will. Let me know when you guys are home too. And send me my portion of the bill." You hummed and grabbed your bag, heading to the exit.
"Thank you." You smiled to the bouncer who opened the velvet rope for you. He gave a nod in reply as you made your way out.
"Hey!" You were suddenly yanked away, causing you stumble. You came face to face with the man earlier.
"Oh, so where are your two friends, huh? They just left you on your own?" He sneered, getting close to your face. You leaned back as he was invading your space.
"Do you not know when to give up?" You tried to break free of his grip. You shoved him back, causing him to let go of your hand.
"You're going to pay for that. And for embarrassing me earlier." He growled.
"Leave me alone and maybe I won't go to the police." You glared at him. You were tired of arguing with him, you wanted to go home and he was seriously getting on your last nerve. But he shoved you against the wall harshly, making you let out a groan as the pain stunned your momentarily.
"I think that's enough." A voice entered and the man was grabbed by the collar, yanked back, away from you. You let out a shaky breath as a suit-clad body stood in front of you.
"H-Hongjoong..." You said shakily, looking at the back of his head. He didn't turn to look at you.
"I've watched you from earlier. You just don't know when to give up. Why don't I give you a taste of your own medicine?" He chuckled.
"H-Hey man. I was just fooling around, I'm sorry." The man took a step back in fear. Hongjoong merely laughed again before he stopped and punched the guy.
"Hongjoong!" You gasped in shock but he was not stopping, raining down punches on the man.
"Hongjoong, stop." You tried to call him.
At that point, it wasn't about saving you anymore. Hongjoong felt so much blind rage and he just couldn't stop. This man just appeared at the wrong place, at the wrong time and became the object for Hongjoong to vent his anger.
"Please." You sat on the ground, covering your ears and shutting your eyes. You were so stunned, you couldn't bring yourself to get up and leave the place.
"What's going on here?" Seonghwa came out, witnessing the scene in front of him.
"Hongjoong, what did you do?" He asked. That snapped Hongjoong out of it. He looked down at the guy's face that was bloodied.
"Shit..." He turned to see you absolutely horrified and terrified. Seonghwa frowned, unsure of what to do now. Luckily, Yunho was quick to go to your side.
"Hey, (y/n). It's me, Yunho." He gently removed your hands from your ears so you could hear him.
"Y-Yunho sshi." You stuttered, unable to breathe. Luckily, Yunho used his body to block your view. He smiled softly.
"Breathe. Let's go." He spoke softly, helping you to your feet. Your legs were so wobbly, you leaned on him, letting him guide you to wherever it was, as long as you were no longer here.
"Here." Once again, he led you up the stairs and brought you to an empty room. You figured it could be a place for VIPs to sit and drink but with all the lights on, it just looked like a regular room with couches. He grabbed a blanket from the basket and put it around you, hopefully it'll bring you some comfort.
"Let me go get you some water. Breathe, it's okay." He said. You nodded slowly, not being able to tell him you wanted him to stay.
"Be right back." He stood up and left the room to get water.
"Yun, what's happening?" Mingi asked his best friend, having bumped into him as he left the room you were in. As he walked to get you water, Yunho filled Mingi in on what happened.
"Damn... So where's the girl now?" Mingi questioned.
"In the room I came from. I left Seonghwa hyung with Hongjoong hyung. I think they'll need a clean up crew." Yunho said.
"On it." Mingi took his phone out and texted for a clean up crew. When Yunho retrieved a cold bottle of water for you, the two went back upstairs.
"I'll go let the others know what happened." Mingi said and parted ways with Yunho, who went back to you.
"I'm so sorry, Yunho sshi. This is all my fault, Hongjoong sshi was just trying to help me. If the owner asks what happened, just tell them it was all me. I didn't mean to cause trouble." You told the male the moment he entered the room.
"(y/n) sshi, it's not your fault, you didn't cause any trouble. And don't worry about Hongjoong hyung. He won't get in trouble with the owner." Yunho assured, opening the bottle for you.
"You're sure?" You asked, gulping the cold water.
"Seeing as to how he's the owner, I'm sure he'll be fine." Yunho tried to joke. Your jaw slacked slightly in surprise.
"So don't worry about him. Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?" Yunho questioned. You shook your head, hands shaking slightly as you clutched the blanket.
"It could be the adrenaline, that's why you don't feel any pain even if you are injured." He said.
"I-Is Hongjoong okay?" You finally asked.
Yunho was surprised by your question. He thought after what you witnessed, you would have asked whether the other guy was okay. If you did, Yunho wouldn't know how to answer that, he didn't know if the guy made it out alive. Maybe the realisation of what actually happened hasn't sunken in for you yet.
"Feel better?" Seonghwa asked, the smoking cigarette between his fingers. Hongjoong blinked then shrugged, it did feel good to vent his emotions out.
"Should have just went to the fight club." He shot his best friend a small smile.
"Clean up crew is coming. We should head in." Seonghwa said and Hongjoong nodded, standing straight and heading in with him.
"Where's (y/n)?" Hongjoong asked.
"Yunho brought her to one of the rooms to calm her down. Mingi's the one that called clean up." Seonghwa informed, walking up the stairs with his hands tucked into his pockets.
"I should find (y/n) and talk to her." Hongjoong said as Seonghwa opened the door to the VIP room that the others were in.
"Hyung, are you okay?" San stood up.
"I'm fine. I can't say the same for the other guy though." Hongjoong nodded his head, taking the glass of whiskey Wooyoung offered to him and took a sip. The other guys all had had relieved looks on their faces while some even laughed.
"Let me go find (y/n)." Hongjoong turned to the door and almost bumped into Yunho, who was entering the room.
"(y/n)'s looking for you..." Yunho informed. At Yunho's words, the rest of the people in the room, including Hongjoong, had surprised looks on their faces.
"She is?" Hongjoong blinked. Yunho nodded and held the door open for him, pointing to where you were.
"(y/n) sshi? Can I come in?" Hongjoong knocked. He heard the soft hum from you and entered, closing the door behind him.
"Are you alright?" He asked softly, approaching your huddled form.
"I-I'm fine. But Yunho sshi thinks it could be a-adrenaline." You tried to look okay but Hongjoong could see how much you were trembling. He sat by you, where Yunho sat earlier.
"Drink this. It'll help." He held out the whiskey glass from his hand. With two shaky hands, you received the crystal glass and carefully took a sip. You winced at the burn and bitterness that hit your tongue. Hongjoong thought you were going to hand it back to him but you suddenly gulped the rest down.
"Woah, slow down." Taking the glass from you, he gave you the bottle of water from the table.
"What about y-you? Are you okay? W-Were you hurt?" You asked with a gulp, eyes trailing to the bruises on his knuckles. Hongjoong nodded his head.
"You are hurt." Hongjoong caught sight of your bruised wrist as you capped the waterbottle. You blinked and looked at your wrist.
"Oh." You looked at it.
"Hang on." Standing up, Hongjoong went to the door and yelled out for someone to get him a first aid kit. You couldn't see who it was but Hongjoong took the first aid kit from someone and returned to you.
"It's just a bruise..." You whispered. Hongjoong placed the first aid box on the table and opened it.
"I guess I wish I had the balm you made." Hongjoong tried to joke about small pot of homemade balm that you had given him.
"Y-You still have it with you?" You couldn't help your curiosity. Hongjoong hummed, his ears turning red. He held his hand out for you to show him your wrist. He was gently in applying a regular ointment over your wrist and wrapping it so it wouldn't smudge.
"Thank you, Hongjoong sshi." You said softly, looking at the bandage he tried his best to wrap neatly.
"No problem. It's the least I could do since you were injured in my establishment." Hongjoong replied, keeping the first aid stuff back into the box.
"It's okay, it's not your fault..." You murmured.
"I think I should go home now." You stood up and nearly fell over, feeling the throb in your ankle.
"Woah, careful." Hongjoong caught you, resulting in you leaning against his body, your face pressed into his chest. You winced as you tried to stand back up.
"Where are you hurt?" Hongjoong frowned with worry.
"It's fine. It's just my ankle." You tried your best to hide the pain but Hongjoong could see the grimace of pain.
"No, it's not fine. Let me get it checked out. Or at least sit down and ice it for a bit before you go." He insisted with a small frown. You chewed on your bottom lip. Being here was slowly making you feel more stressed and anxious, right now you just wanted to get out of here and go home.
"Hongjoong sshi. Please... I just want to go home." Tears filled your eyes. You couldn't control the way they fell down your face, they were not stopping.
"Alright, I'll take you home." He whispered, suddenly feeling a tightness in his chest from guilt as he watched you cry.
"Come on." Putting your arm around his shoulders, he helped you out of the room and down the stairs.
"Boss." The workers bowed to him as you passed them but he didn't acknowledge them. He led you to the VIP entrance in the back where the car was already waiting for you.
"Mr Kim." The driver opened the door for both of you. Hongjoong helped you in and removed his jacket, draping it over your lap.
"Hongjoong hyung." Yeosang called out to him just as he closed the door.
"I'm taking her home." Hongjoong informed. The 7 of them nodded and Hongjoong entered the other side to sit with you. You wiped your remaining tears with your hands, sniffling slightly.
Thankfully, Hongjoong didn't talk to you the rest of the trip home. You were so tired but your mind was racing. Whatever happened tonight has never happened to you before, you didn't know what to do and how to react.
"(y/n) sshi... We're here." His voice made you jump slightly. You blinked and looked up, seeing that you were indeed outside your apartment building.
"Oh... Thanks." You removed his jacket from your lap and got out of the car, standing on both legs.
"Let me escort you up, at least." Hongjoong came out from his side of the car.
"N-No, it's okay. I'd rather go up on my own." You shook your head. Hongjoong sighed and nodded his head, realising that he might be pushing you too much.
"Look, (y/n) sshi. I'm sorry about tonight and-"
"If it's okay with you, I would not like to think or revisit what happened tonight." You cut him off with a polite smile.
"Right..." He nodded. You cleared your throat and bowed gratefully to him before limping into your apartment building. Hongjoong stood there, making sure you went in safely before going into the car.
You entered your apartment and made sure to lock the door, leaning against the front door with a sigh. The first thing you did was text your friends that you were home. They may give you hell for texting them so late but you knew that they were just good friends and worried about you.
"Oh god..." You covered your mouth as you started to remember what happened tonight.
"What have I gotten myself into?" You asked yourself in disbelief. Did Mrs Kim know about Hongjoong and not tell you? Was there an underlying motive in getting to know you?
But what would Mrs Kim or Hongjoong want with you?
"No, no. Maybe she didn't know." You shook your head. Give wanted to give Mrs Kim the benefit of doubt.
"My son, he can be short tempered but underneath, he's just trying to protect everyone that he loves." Mrs Kim smiled softly as you poured more tea for her.
"He's a good son then." You hummed.
"He is. Even if I have a lot of faults and haven't been the best mother to him, he grew up to be a good man." She said.
"I hope you two can reconcile soon. It seems like you had a good relationship." You reached over to hold her hand. Mrs Kim merely shot you a sad smile that showed she thought otherwise.
"Maybe." Was all she said.
Hongjoong stood by his office window, staring out into the night sky. He sipped the whiskey from his glass, a soft sigh escaping him. As the leader of Ateez, he was never really open with his feelings. He didn't really like to feel vulnerable around anyone.
"You've been keeping everything in. So I guess it could have happened at any time when all your feelings come pouring out." Seonghwa said, sitting on the couch.
"It's annoying." Hongjoong sighed.
"Well, you're human, Joong. Even if you don't like your feelings, they'll always be there." Seonghwa chuckled.
"I don't even know her. But whenever she's around, I feel so conflicted. I'm angry and a part of me wants to resent her but I also want to talk to her." Hongjoong turned away from the window.
"Because whether you want to admit it or not, you want to know more about your mother." Seonghwa pointed out.
"This is so unnecessary, I don't need this." He groaned.
"But it is what it is. If you were to sit with her and learn more about your mother, can you say for certain that you'll be able to control your emotions?" Seonghwa asked.
"No. The mere mention of my mother by her makes me so..." Hongjoong clenched his fists.
"I'm not ready to hear what a wonderful person my mother was." He said bitterly.
"Then stay away until you are. Don't forget, it's not just about you. She has to be ready to hear your side too. To hear what your mother did to you and what your relationship was like." Seonghwa reminded. Hongjoong nodded glumly, that was another thing he didn't want to bring to the surface again.
"Look, after tonight, give her space to breathe. We just have to focus on other work for now, Ateez needs you." Seonghwa squeezed Hongjoong's shoulder.
"Mmm, I know. Thanks for holding down the fort, Seonghwa ah." Hongjoong shot his friend a smile.
"Of course. We're all behind you, supporting you, Joong." The taller hummed.
"She's not from our world, our normal is not her normal. And the less people in our world, the better." Seonghwa reminded. Hongjoong agreed, they've become so desensitised to violence and death.
"I'm worried that my mother's relationship with her has pulled her into our world, whether she wants it or not." Hongjoong said.
"Maybe, maybe not." Seonghwa shrugged.
Although Seonghwa didn't want to push Hongjoong to work more when he was already such a workaholic, he knew Ateez will serve as a distraction from you.
"About the guy from earlier..." Hongjoong's voice broke Seonghwa's train of thought.
"He's alive, in the hospital. But the police won't be investigating, they're just ruling it as a bar fight gone wrong. Even if he wanted to press charges, he can't argue against multiple eye witnesses." Seonghwa said, a glint in his eye.
~
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babyhatesreality · 25 days ago
Note
Could you write something where there’s an emergency and stucky have to go help and reader is being so brave in the safe room? Or something else.. I trust you💗💗
Over a year later....I'm sorry for the delay. Please believe me it eats at me. Hope you're still around for this, and I love you <3
Take One Down
Pairing: Daddy!Stucky x Little!F!Reader, featuring big Peter
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Warnings: DDLG (SSC), f! reader, reader is named but name scarcely used, language, pet names, attack on the Tower during the night, Bucky is armed, slight alcohol reference, angsty/scared baby, a few tears, safe room. Happy Ending- always :)
A/N- also Happy Birthday to me :D
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN MEDIA CONSUMPTION. THIS STORY IS SFW- THE REST OF MY BLOG IS NOT NECESSARILY SO. MINORS DNI. I DO NOT CONSENT FOR MY WORK TO BE STOLEN, COPIED, OR TRANSLATED ONTO ANY OTHER SITE BUT MY OWN. Likes, comments and reblogs are deeply appreciated.
The first thing you became aware of was that Papa was breathing hard. And you were in his arms.
Then you realized you weren't in bed, and you were moving. Fast.
"Papa?" you whimpered sleepily, not being awake enough to understand what was happening.
"Shh, shh, it's okay baby, you're okay," Papa said instantly, pressing a quick kiss in your hair. Despite his soothing words, he didn't slow his pace at all.
You forced your heavy eyelids to open, and then almost immediately shut them again as the flashing red lights in the hallway were too bright. You were still in your pajamas, but you definitely weren't at home. Steve could feel that you were waking up and becoming more alert, but he couldn't stop. He had to get you to safety.
"Where's Daddy?" you asked, your voice trembling as you started to realize something was wrong. "Daddy okay?"
"Right here, Trouble," came Daddy's voice from farther away. You tried to twist in Papa's arms to see where Daddy was, but Papa's iron grip on you didn't leave much purchase.
"It's okay, princess, you're safe, but I need you to be a good girl and be quiet for us right now, okay?" Steve said, deliberately keeping his voice calm and low even through the exertion of running.
"'Kay," you said as quietly as you could, holding on to Papa tightly, shutting your eyes tightly, and trying to be brave. Steve kissed your hair again and kept running.
Within 30 seconds, you felt Steve stop. You opened your eyes and looked around. It took you a second, but you recognized this place. You'd been here before, back when you very first came to live with Steve and Bucky. You were in the panic room.
The reinforced steel walls were made slightly less intimidating by the giant sofa that could convert into a bed, the soft rug that nearly covered every inch of floor, and the overwhelming amount of toys and stuffed animals in baskets and boxes all around the edge of one wall. You hadn't been here in a while, but you could never forget this place.
Your eyes darted all around, trying to get some answers or understanding as to what happened, but before it came to you, Steve set you down carefully on your feet and took you gently by the shoulders. You heard Bucky shut and lock the door, but before you could turn to look Steve gently guided your face back towards his.
"Katie-Cat, I need you to listen to me, okay?" Steve said, looking you very seriously and directly in the eye. "Someone is in the Tower. Someone who's not supposed to be here. We don't know how they got in, but right now, we need to keep you safe so we can go get them out. Do you understand?"
"I- yes, Papa," you said shakily. You swallowed your nerves down and tried to be brave.
"Good girl," Steve said, as a fierce wave of protectiveness rushed through him. "Peter is on his way, and he's going to stay in here with you and keep you safe while Daddy and I go get the person out. Okay?"
"Petey coming?"
"Yes."
"He don't need to fight?"
"Right now, he needs to keep you safe, that's his most important job."
"But...who gonna keep him safe?"
"He's Big Peter right now, munchkin- he's going to be okay. Can you be a good girl and listen to what Peter says and do what he tells you to?"
"Um- yeah. Papa-" "Good girl. You remember the rules of the safe room?"
"Papa..."
"The rules, Katie-Cat."
"Don't leave the room unless you, Daddy, or Aunt Nat comes to get me, don't open the door for nobody, and....and be good."
"That's my girl," Steve said, his heart both proud and shattered that you had to know these things.
"Papa?" you tried again.
"Yes?"
"You gonna come back, right? You and Daddy?" you asked in a small voice. Steve pulled you into his chest immediately in the biggest bear hug.
"Yes, baby," he said, his voice thick with emotion. "Daddy and I will always come back for you. Always."
Just then, you felt another pair of arms wrap around you two. "Try and keep us away, Trouble," Daddy added in a light, joking tone, but even you could feel the tension underneath it. "Here, I brought you someone who can help you too." Bucky reached behind him and pulled Jellybean out of his back pocket, where he had unceremoniously stuffed her as he and Steve were racing to get you out of the apartment.
You gasped sharply, and pulled your beloved bunny in so tightly to your face that her little button nose left a slight imprint on your cheek. "Tank you Daddy," you said, trying hard not to cry. "AND tank you Papa for carryin' me," you added quickly, not wanting him to feel left out. Both men responded by hugging you tighter.
Just then, the panic room door clicked, announcing that someone else was coming in. Bucky immediately dropped his arms and spun so you and Steve were behind him, his gun appearing in his hand as if by magic. However, once he saw that it was Tony and Peter, he instantly lowered the gun and ran to bolt the door back behind them.
"Pete, you sure you're good?" Tony asked immediately the second the door was shut.
"I'm good Dad, I swear," Peter said. You looked at him wide-eyed- it had been a while since you had heard his big voice.
"Okay. Only if you're sure," Tony pressed.
"I'm sure. I wouldn't take a chance if I wasn't."
"Atta boy."
Tony turned towards the three of you to find Steve smiling at him. "That's good enough for me," Steve said kindly to Peter. "But if there's any trouble at all, and I mean anything, you radio us. Copy?"
"Copy," Peter nodded quickly. "I'll link with your comms now," he said, before pulling out the large, black case from underneath the sleeper bed sofa. He quickly opened the case and got to work on a radio comm.
You watched him carefully. He was so...different and serious when he was Big- not the silly, carefree bestie you immediately recognized- so it was always surprising to you when you saw it. Of course, YOUR definition of 'serious' was much, much different than Tony's or Steve's or Bucky's, but that didn't matter now, as you watched Peter's fingers fly over the machinery.
"Okay, we should be linked," he said into the comm. All three men immediately nodded, confirming that they could hear him in their earpieces. Steve and Bucky spun back to you.
"Do what Peter says. We'll be back as soon as we can," Daddy said gruffly, taking your face in his hands and pressing a long kiss to your forehead. "We love you so much. Be good, got it?"
"Got it," you said, trying to match his gruff tone to show him you could be serious too. That made the ghost of a smile cross his lips, and as Steve kissed you too, it stayed. Tony even came over, quickly, giving you what he hoped was a carefree grin.
"Alright, have fun, stay safe. Don't tap the keg unless you really need to," he said, tapping your nose and grinning when you looked confused and Steve tutted loudly. Bucky was the last one out the door, and before he left, he turned to Peter.
"You remember the code word?" he asked the young man brusquely. Peter nodded, but due to the door being opened, didn't say it. "Good job," Bucky said with that faint grin again, closing and locking the door behind him.
It was deathly silent in the room. You swallowed hard, gripping Jellybean tightly, almost afraid to move, even though you knew you were in the safest spot imaginable (outside of your daddies' arms). Peter immediately noticed your distress.
"Hey Katie, hey Little One," he said softly, holding out his arms to you. "You wanna come here?"
You nodded, then slowly walked towards him. You cautiously stepped into his arms. Once he folded them around you, you inhaled. His scent never changed, no matter if he was big or small, and you knew this was your Petey, no matter how he was feeling right now. You threw your arms around him and hugged him back tightly, and felt him give a soft chuckle. "It's okay, you're okay. I'm gonna keep you safe- you know that, right?"
You pulled back a bit, nodding. "Tank you, Petey. I mean...Peter."
Peter smiled. "Ah, that's okay. You can call me Petey right now if you want to."
"I can?"
"Sure you can."
"Otay Petey," you said, suddenly feeling a little better upon hearing that. "What's happenin' in da Tower?"
"What did Uncle Steve and Uncle Bucky tell you?" Peter asked carefully.
"Um, dat someone got in dat wasn't a'sposed to be in?"
"That's right. And they'll get 'em out, so you don't have to worry about them anymore, okay?"
"Um....okay," you said, wanting to trust Peter with your whole heart, but still uncertain due to the nature of the circumstance. Peter saw pretty quickly that he would need to distract you.
"Hey, you wanna sit on the couch and read some stories while we wait?" He trotted over to the box containing tons of books and started pawing through them. "You can pick out whichever stories you want. Okay?"
Curiosity peaked, you trotted over to look. You recognized The Gruffalo and Frozen, pointing at them. "I like those!" you said excitedly, and Peter snatched them up.
"Let's get to reading!" he said. "Race you to the couch!"
Since it was only a couple feet away, it wasn't much of a race, but it was still fun. It was always fun when you got to run. You both jumped onto the couch enthusiastically, and Peter opened up the first book and began to read. You inched closer and closer to him as he continued, eventually snuggling into his side, your thumb in your mouth and Jellybean in the crook of your arm.
He finished off Frozen in about ten minutes, then turned to you. "Alright, Katie, you ready for...THE GRUFFALO??" he said in a mock scary voice that made you laugh. But once you stopped laughing at his silliness, you had another question in mind.
"Petey, what's a keg?" you asked innocently.
Poor Peter nearly broke his neck doing a double take. "Wh-what?" he asked, not sure of what he heard. When he was in little space with you, your random questions and changes of subject made perfect sense to him, but when he was bigger it was hard to keep up sometimes.
"Unca Tony said don't tap da keg unless we needed to. What's a keg?"
"It's nothing....he was just being silly. Let's read."
"Is a weapon?"
"No...it's....hey, look, books. Let's read."
"But what IS it?"
"Ahhhh...it's....you know....it's...hey, you wanna sing a song?" Peter said, loudly and excitedly, hoping the non-sequitur would distract you.
It worked. "What kind of song?" you asked, intrigued.
"Umm..." Peter thought quickly, trying to get your mind off of what a keg was. He felt a flicker of compassion for Uncle Steve whenever his Dad did this to you, but mostly he was trying to come up with a song. "Hey, do you know Ninety Nine Bottles of...." he said suddenly, his brain both working and failing him miserably all at the same time.
"Bottles of what?" you asked, now completely invested. Peter broke out in a cold sweat. He couldn't teach you a song about beer, for goodness' sake.
"Did I say bottles? That was silly. I meant...boxes. Yeah, boxes!...of... juice! That was it! Ninety Nine boxes of juice on the wall! Do you know that song?" he improvised wildly. You tilted your head, trying to think, but then shook it.
"How's it go?"
Peter cleared his throat awkwardly. He wasn't much of a singer, but he knew he was going to have to give it a go if he had any hope of distracting you from asking about kegs. Uncle Steve and Uncle Bucky would rip his head off if he told you, and he knew that you were stubborn enough to keep asking. But man...he REALLY didn't want to sing and embarrass himself in front of you....
Just then, you both heard a loud crash coming from somewhere below. It was loud enough that it made you both jump, even though the room didn't even shudder. Peter watched as your face turned pale and you gripped your bunny tighter. You pinched your lips together and breathed slowly. He knew exactly what you were doing. You were trying to calm down and being as brave as you could be. His heart melted for you.
And he found his courage in that.
"So...the song," he said, rubbing his hands up and down your arms to regain your attention and hopefully calm you a bit. "It goes..." he coughed again, took a deep breath, and went for it. "Ninety nine boxes of juice on the wall....ninety nine boxes of juice....you take one down and pass it around...ninety eight boxes of juice on the wall!"
You blinked at him, wide-eyed, and waited for the rest. He looked back at you hopefully to see how this was going down.
"Short song," you said, tilting your head, confused. Peter rolled his eyes and chuckled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A short time later, Steve and Bucky were finishing sweeping their own floor and apartment. "Clear," Steve said definitively into the comm. "Natasha, Tony, Thor, what's your status?"
When everyone came through confirming the all-clear, Fury came through the line. "Rogers, Barnes, Stark- go get 'em." It was all the permission they needed.
Steve got their first, but instead of punching the code in immediately, he stopped and stared at the door. "Steve?" Bucky asked in a tense voice, instantly on alert. To his immense surprise, Steve turned to him, a look of astonished humor on his face.
"Buck, listen," he whispered. Bucky strained his ears...and then couldn't believe what he was hearing. The room was sound proofed, but hey- they were super soldiers.
"Twenty-three boxes of juice on the wall, twenty-three boxes of juuuuuicceeeee...."
Bucky punched in the code. The second before he touched the keypad though, he heard Peter's voice cut off suddenly, and then within .5 seconds, your voice cut off too. The button panel lit up green and the door unbolted. Bucky threw the door open, Steve right behind him.
Peter was standing in the middle of the room, his suit in the last phase of forming around him, in his classic Spiderman pose. Bucky raised his hands immediately.
"Password?" Peter asked firmly.
"Trouble," Bucky replied immediately. Peter instantly relaxed and stood up straight, his suit disappearing, knowing for sure this was Bucky. "Good job Peter," Bucky said gratefully, even as he and Steve were rushing to the secret panel they knew you were hiding in. The second they slid the door back, you threw yourself into their waiting arms.
Bucky held you so tight you could feel his every breath, and Steve kept kissing your hair and murmuring what a good girl you were. Eventually, you looked over and saw Tony and Peter in an embrace as well, Tony clapping his young charge on the back proudly.
"Are you okay, angel?" Steve asked you, his eyes lovingly scanning your face. You nodded happily.
"Yeah, Papa! We good! Did you get the bad guys?"
"We sure did."
"YAY!! Who was dey? How did dey get in? What did-"
"Okay, angel, that's too many questions for a little girl right now," Steve said gently, nuzzling your nose with his. "We're safe and it's time to go home. Can we go say goodbye and thank you to Peter?"
You nodded again, suddenly very sleepy from all the receding adrenaline. Bucky carried you over to Tony and Peter.
"She was so good and brave, Dad," Peter was saying enthusiastically to Tony. "She picked out books and sang and we jumped on the couch and everything!"
"You did so good, buddy, I couldn't be more proud of you," Tony said, his seams bursting. He grinned at you as you approached. "Hey, thanks for taking it easy on the kid, little one."
"Petey was da best!! He taught me a new song. Papa, you're gonna love it!"
Steve smirked. "I'm sure I will, baby. Can you say thank you please?"
You wiggled a bit, wanting Bucky to let you down, but you gave up pretty quickly. After being separated from you during a stressful situation, Bucky didn't like to put you down for anything. You leaned forward towards Peter, however, and he accommodated you. You gave your big bestie the biggest hug you possibly could.
"Tank you for taking care of me, Petey," you said lovingly. He squeezed you back.
"Thank you for being so good, Katie!" he responded. Tony clapped a hand on his shoulder. He could hear it in Peter's voice- he was getting close to becoming small again, and he wanted to get his brave boy home. You all said your goodbyes and headed home.
You were cuddled between your daddies and asleep again before you knew it, secure in the knowledge that you were safe and loved by the best people in the galaxy.
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whump-imagines · 9 months ago
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Lightning and Panic
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I swear I will write for other characters too... I'm just currently deep in Buck and Eddie brain rot.
Buddie x reader
Wc: 1300 ish
You pinched your arm, flinching at the sensation. There was no way this was real. This was your worst nightmare. You just needed to try harder and you were sure you would wake up.
Pinching the same spot once more, you realized that you were likely going to have a bruise soon.
Yet again, you were sitting in this awful waiting room. It felt like you had just been here waiting for news was after Eddie was shot.
Now, it was Buck.
It had been two days of waiting. Two days of worrying. Two days of desperately trying to convince yourself that he was going to be okay.
You knew they had a dangerous job. You thought you'd been prepared for that. You expected burns or maybe smoke inhalation. Not a sniper and a freak lightning strike.
Truthfully, you'd only prepared for minor injuries. Not near death experiences.
Suddenly, Eddie was kneeling in front of you. Why did he look so concerned? Something went wrong. Buck was gone.
He was talking. Why couldn't you hear him? Why are your ears ringing?
Eddie squeezed your hands almost too tight. He was trying to ground you. He took a slow exaggerated deep breath then finally, his words broke through your haze. “Breathe.”
It was then you finally realized you were barely wheezing air in and out and much too quickly. Your heart was racing. You gasped. “I-I–” more gasping. “C-c-can’t.”
Eddie moved your hands to his chest. “Yes, you can. Just follow me.” His fingers dug into the pulse point at your wrist as he took another slow beep breath and counted the pattern for you.
Tears rolled down your face as you desperately tried to calm down. You yanked your hands away from Eddie to pull at the collar of your shirt. It suddenly felt like it was strangling you.
Eddie turned toward Bobby and said something to him about a doctor. Had he whispered? Maybe. Your ears were also ringing more intensely again.
Now, you were grabbing at your chest. “H–hurts,” you panted out the word.
“I know, sweetheart,” Eddie soothed. “Just try to breathe.” He pulled your hands back down to your lap and once again pressed his fingers into your pulse point. You could see the worry in his eyes despite trying to stay calm for you.
You desperately tried to draw in more air but failed. Before long, black spots started to appear in front of your eyes. Then there was a doctor. He had to be there about Buck. You tried to back away, you couldn't handle any more bad news. “No.”
Eddie moved to the chair beside you and pulled you against his side. “It's okay, sweetheart. He's here to help you.” He pulled up your sleeve then nodded to the doctor.
There was something cold on your shoulder then a pinch and a burning sensation. You couldn't move away from it as Eddie had you held firmly in place.
Almost immediately, you felt calmer. You relaxed fully into Eddie and finally drew in a deep breath. A nurse you hadn't noticed placed an oxygen mask over your face.
You felt Eddie’s sigh of relief. “You're okay.” You weren't sure if he was talking to you or himself. “The doctor is going to run a few tests just to make sure that was a panic attack and nothing else, okay?”
You tried to snuggle further into him not wanting to leave his side. “‘m tired.”
“I know. Just relax. It's okay if you fall asleep,” Eddie soothed. He stood and lifted you into his arms bridal style. You dozed off with your head against his shoulder before he made it to the exam room.
When you opened your eyes, you were alone in a hospital room. As the grogginess started to lift, confusion set in. Why were you here? Why were you alone? There were no monitors or IV lines and aside for being tired, you felt okay.
Then the memory hit. Buck. You jerked upright. “Oh, no.” You would have stood to go find out how he was but you were suddenly dizzy. So instead, you pressed the nurse call button on the bed rail.
The dizziness mostly cleared and you were considering going to look for Eddie and check on Buck when the door swung open and a doctor entered. You vaguely remembered him from the waiting room earlier. “How’re you feeling?” he asked.
“How is Buck?” you asked, ignoring his question.
Before he could answer, Eddie came in and was by your side a moment later. “How are you?”
You huffed. “How’s Buck?”
Eddie smiled. “He's breathing on his own. He's getting better.”
Tears slid down your face as the relief washed over you. You finally felt like you could breathe again.
“Now, back to you,” Eddie redirected. “Are you feeling better?”
Shrugging one shoulder, you thought about it. “Honestly, I'm still tired. I was dizzy but that's passed. How long was I out?”
“Almost five hours,” said Eddie.
Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Holy crap. Wait, I thought I heard something about tests.”
“You did.” Eddie looked to the doctor to let him explain.
“We ran an EKG and blood tests because you were having some chest pain during your anxiety attack,” he explained. “Everything came back normal.”
“So then am I captive here or can I go see Buck?” you asked.
“You're free to leave,” the doctor said. Then he left the two of you alone.
“I'm sorry,” he started. “I should have been paying attention. I should have noticed you hadn't really slept or eaten. Or at least that you hadn't taken your meds.”
You just shook your head. “It's not your fault. We were both focused on Buck.”
“I still should have noticed.”
“You noticed when I was having an attack and got me help. That's all that matters.”
He just nodded, not seeming convinced.
“Can we go sit with Buck?” you asked.
“Maddie and their parents are in with him right now,” Eddie started. “How about we just go look through the window so you can see he's okay and then we go home so you can get some more rest?”
“I don't want to leave him. What if something happens?” You felt yourself spiraling. “What if something happens and– and we're not here?”
Eddie took your face between his hands and forced you to look at him. “Breathe.” He demonstrated a deep, calming breath for you. “He is stable. They don't expect anything to change overnight. And even if it did, we're not that far away. Okay?”
You took a few deep breaths. “Mmkay.”
“Besides, you know Buck would want you to rest and take care of yourself rather than sit around here.”
“Ugh. Fine,” you conceded. “Can we not tell him about my panic attack earlier?”
Eddie shook his head. “We can wait until he gets home. Unless he asks directly because I won't lie to him.”
You agreed and the two of you made your way towards the ICU. It really did help you to see him doing better. Leaning your head on Eddie’s shoulder, you were content to just stand I'm that hallway until Buck woke up but Eddie wouldn't go for that.
“Ready to go?” he asked.
“No,” you told him truthfully. “But we can anyway.”
A week later, Buck was finally coming home. You were practically vibrating with excitement.
Walking into the house, you tried to lead Buck towards the bedroom but he stopped you and attempted to head toward the couch. “You need to be resting,” you scolded him.
“Are you going to rest?” he asked.
“Me?” You asked, confused. “I'm fine. I didn't die a few days ago.”
Buck frowned. “The doctors ran tests to make sure you weren't having a heart attack because you nearly passed out from a panic attack.”
You scowled at Eddie. “When did you tell him?”
Eddie just shrugged. “He asked while you were loading up the car. I told you I wasn't going to lie to him.”
You sighed. “Regardless, I'm fine.”
Eddie shoved you and Buck towards the bedroom. “I think we could all use some rest. Let's all go take a nap and then we can watch a movie and eat take out in bed.”
“Sounds amazing. Except, when do we need to pick up Christopher?” you asked.
“Carla is keeping him overnight so we can get Buck settled in,” Eddie explained.
Buck nodded. “I vote pizza.”
“Deal,” you and Eddie agreed in unison.
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sunnys-out · 11 months ago
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Alexia, mi reinita, mi amor, mi todo | Alexia Putellas x Reader
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A/N: Not me wanting to get this out still on Alexia's birthday like I'm turning an essay in at midnight. Ok honestly I would write a part two of this but that's only if people are interested. Again requests are closed for now.
So it's a little angsty, has a little hurt/comfort (I know this woman gives the best hugs let's be real), and some Alexia fluff.
Based on this prompt list: #4, #20
Warnings: Anxiety/panic attack symptoms
WC: 1860
Alexia had resolved it in herself that she would use whatever leverage she had to have you stay at Barcelona. She was not the type to use that card…she was not that kind of player…the type to threaten to leave to get what she wanted, but the thing she wanted was you. She had tried to speak with some of the staff about it but they were “conveniently busy”. With no success, she texts you “Voy a casa, te veo pronto, amor” (I’m going home, I’ll see you soon, love)  before driving over to your shared home.
Barcelona was dragging their feet with regards to your contract of whether you would be renewed or be traded to some other club, some other league, some other country. You had spent 4 years dedicated to Barcelona and had earned your spot in the midfield. The statistics you pulled throughout your career there were phenomenal, the kind that made your girlfriend proud to see because she was there from the beginning. So why was Barcelona playing a cat and mouse game with your livelihood?
______________________________________________________________
“Alexia, mi Reinita, mi amor, mi todo (my little queen, my love, my everything),
You know that I am better with my words written on paper than spoken to you. You still make me nervous when I look at you; I still blush as quickly as I did when we first met. I write this to you because I’m going to America to Bay FC…the deal has been done and the announcements will be out in a couple of weeks, but I wanted you to be the first to know. 
______________________________________________________________
The amount of times that Alexia had found you at that kitchen table with your head covered by your arms crying out your frustrations at another deal that went nowhere. She would never say a word and just quietly wrapped her arms around you and kissed the back of your head before laying hers on it. Once the crying stopped her hand would gently rub your back until eventually you began to move and pulled her into a hug with your head at her abdomen with a quick whisper of “let’s go to sleep”. Her only words would be “of course, cariño (dear)”.
______________________________________________________________
I know how you are mi amor (my love) but fighting the club is not worth it. It is hard to swallow the reality that the club that I grew up watching, grew up to play in, does not carry the same love and dedication I had for them…for me. You were one of the first people I met 4 years ago when I transferred from my club team in Mexico. It was a big move and you were there to just welcome me in, you knew immediately that I did not take change very well and was uncomfortable with everything. 
______________________________________________________________
Alexia, at some point, blocked some sports news outlets on your social media because of how overwhelming the “(y/n) Transfer Rumor” posts were getting for you. You did not want to leave Barcelona, you had made a home there with Alexia and the thought of leaving all of what you had terrified you. 
You could already hear the comments from the “fans” questioning your loyalty, why you couldn’t just confirm that you would be staying at Barça or leaving the team all together, why you were silent on the rumors? Alexia would be there with her head on your shoulder quietly holding you in the kitchen quieting the noises in your head with a simple kiss to the temple.
“Mi princesa, go sit down.. I’ll make dinner” she’d whisper into your hair as she led you to the table and made dinner while you watched with warmth at the woman before you. 
______________________________________________________________
I remember you would tease me about my accent when I spoke Spanish and said you would give me lessons if I made you a bag after you saw me crocheting mine on the bus to my first away game. I know that the Spanish lessons were just a way to spend time with me. You could have asked me to be with you at any point and I would have said yes. I remember you teaching me how to dance in our kitchen one night after saying that I was worried about making a fool out of myself at my brother’s wedding. I’m going to miss our 3 am dances we would do when I was pacing the kitchen stressed out of my mind on this transfer.
As you said, “Here I don’t want you to walk back and forth alone, just dance with me instead…I'm here”. I still remember the feeling of you under my palms; every curve, every line as I would take the lead of the dance and you would look at me calmly guiding my hands like how you did when you first taught me…yeah I’ll miss those quiet moments the most. 
______________________________________________________________
You had not gone to practice that morning due to stomach issues and you had to basically push Alexia out of the door so that she went to practice. 
“I’ll get some rest do not worry, mi Reinita” You say as she answers with a quick kiss.
She grabs her bags and gives another kiss pulling you in,“I’ll be home as soon as I'm done ok?”.
Alexia entered through the doorway of the shared home and saw several moving boxes littered on the floor. Confused, she looks for you as there is not the usual soft music that you play when you are doing chores and finds you wrapped in a blanket sound asleep on the couch.
Her bag is gently put to the ground as she rounds the corner of the couch. She sees the coffee table littered with papers and your phone with an unread message from her.
She quietly looms over the papers, seeing a copy of your original Barcelona contract, the proposal, the rejection to the proposal, another club offer and, finally, the letter to confirm intention to transfer. Your phone lights up with another notification; getting the attention of Alexia who notices the handwritten letter that remained unfinished under your phone. 
You were a semi - heavy sleeper so she picked up the letter and began to read as her soft smile appeared, fell and then reappeared.  The boxes made sense now, you were organizing your things ahead of time to leave. Seems that you received the news that morning, explaining why the staff were busy when Alexia tried her best to speak with them.
She looked down at your handwriting again…she’s so familiar with it as you have always littered her spaces with sticky notes of encouragement, love and everything in between. You always thought she had thrown them away but on your 2nd year anniversary she showed you the box where she had kept every single note that you had written to her. 
It didn’t matter to her; she kept all the ones that said “Hi Ale, can you get some milk?”, “Reinita, there is dinner in the fridge”, “I’m too lazy, I ordered pizza oh and I guess Patri is coming over?’ 
This letter no matter how long she will keep especially close to her.
Alexia sat at the other end of the couch and began to read the last bit of the letter.
______________________________________________________________
I know that I will be so far from you and that you will miss the things that I do. You were always a romantic like that mi amor (my love). That’s why I am going to leave you my favorite book, the one that I always read way too many times and have cried over just as much. The only thing that I ask is that you don’t open it until I am gone and you are missing me. Just saying not to is going to make you want to open the book even more but please listen to me on this one. :)
I don’t know what the fixtures of the NWSL are yet but I know that you will want to -
______________________________________________________________
You stir and stretch out your legs pushing Alexia in the process. The resistance pulled you from your sleep.
Alexia laughs softly as she pats your leg, “Sleep well, cariño (dear)?” 
You only nod as you rub the sleep from your eyes. Without a word, you sit up and look at Alexia who fiddles with the note that you had written. 
“I wish I was at least awake when you found out, amor (love)” you start as you shift over to be closer to her.
“Are you mad at me?” your head now lying on her shoulder.
Alexia looks, almost, offended at the comment as she turns to you.
“This is your decision, cariño, you know that I will support in whatever you do and wherever you go…I’m sad, yes, but seeing you living out your dreams has been a honor for me…so no I’m not mad solamente bien orgullosa de ti (only very proud of you)”.
She pulls you closer, her hand softly rubbing your arm as she hears the small sniffles coming from you.
“Promise me you’ll watch at least one game” you say softly.
Alexia laughs and kisses the top of your head, “Amor, I’ll watch every one”.
______________________________________________________________
The announcement came and went and so did you. You found yourself preparing for the inaugural season for Bay FC. The fans had taken a liking to you immediately and the management welcomed you with open arms. 
Alexia, remained in your shared home that now was quieter without your presence. The spaces that normally were filled with little posts were bare, the days for chores weren’t filled with your questionable music, and Alexia no longer needed to dance in the kitchen at 3 am.
After a particularly hard practice, Alexia returned home missing you more than usual. As she plopped down on the couch her eyes fell on your book that you left behind for her.
She remembered that you had asked her to not open it until you were gone to your new club.
Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg, it was the book that you read every year during the summer without fail. No matter how many times you read it, Alexia would see you tear up and close the book to compose yourself before continuing. 
She got the book and opened to the first page and seeing a small, sticky note,
“I miss you, mi reinita”.
Alexia flipped the page and found another one,
“You can text my mom for her soup recipe, she’d only give it to you”
A laugh escapes her as she continues through the book finding more and more of your notes that you had written out. She skips to the end and finds an older looking note.
“I love you, Alexia Putellas…” with the date of your 1st anniversary with Alexia.
And below with newer ink and dated the day that you had left.
“And I… I still love you, even after all of this time”.
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suzukiblu · 1 month ago
Text
Day twenty-nine of “obligatory sugar baby Kon” behind the cut. prev: (( chrono || non-chrono ))
“The mahjong tiles are new,” Cissie observes, watching Tim just a shade too sharply. He internally hopes the others get here soon. He and Cissie arrived about the same time, and when she texted Bart to remind him they were all meeting up he showed up five seconds later, and Suzie was excited to see them but almost immediately ran off to get something. And Cassie and Kon had both said they’d be late–Cassie’s mom made her stay home for dinner, and Kon had just said something about something called “the Evil Factory” and a mission report he had to finish and then hung up without elaborating, which had totally not made Tim quietly insane or anything. 
The Evil Factory. What. What even is that? 
Tim needs to look into some things, clearly. 
“I’ve learned not to ask,” Tim says, and the look Cissie is giving him turns very pointed. 
“But you’re asking me about school?” she says. 
“Yes,” Tim says, because it’s not like she’s not perfectly aware he just did that, but also he doesn’t actually have to explain himself, so he just stops there. 
Cissie stares blankly at him. Tim keeps a neutral but approachable expression on his face. Filling an awkward silence is the first mistake any witness–or suspect–makes. 
She narrows her eyes, just barely, then opens her mouth to speak and–
“CISSIE,” Cassie wails from down the hall, and a second later she’s bolting into the room at full-speed and throwing herself at Cissie. Tim reflexively grabs for his bo and Cissie grabs for her–uh, bow–and Cassie makes an absolutely agonized noise and buries her face in Cissie’s lap. “I quit. I quit the team. I’m gonna ask Wonder Woman if I can move to Themyscira and I am never coming back.” 
. . . alright then, Tim thinks, just barely raising his eyebrows behind his mask. Maybe not a supervillain attack, then. 
“I’d really prefer it if you didn’t, actually,” Cissie says. “So like is this about your mom or–?” 
“Kon’s wearing clothes,” Cassie cuts her off despairingly, voice muffled in her folded arms and Cissie’s lap. 
“. . . I mean, I’d hope so?” Cissie says, patting the top of Cassie’s wig with a bewildered.expression as she sets her bow back down on the table. Tim–well, he might not hope that Kon was–never mind. But that seems like a pretty weird answer to that question either way. 
“You don’t understand,” Cassie groans. “I ran into him outside–he’s texting somebody or something, I don’t know, he said he was gonna be a minute–and he said ‘hi’ and he was wearing clothes and I tripped! I tripped in mid-air! I tripped in mid-air and he tried to help me up and I think I blacked out or something and then he laughed and he’s wearing clothes, Cissie!” 
Tim feels like maybe this is in some way “girl talk” and he shouldn’t necessarily be here, but also: what the hell is Cassie talking about? 
He also wonders who Kon’s texting and has the vaguely-annoyed thought that Cadmus might be bothering him or something. 
The subtle alert that means someone just texted Tim Drake’s phone goes off on his communicator and he makes a mental note to check it as soon as he can get a moment–it might be Dana or Mrs. Mac, or maybe one of the guys at school needs something, or . . . well, it could be his dad, technically, but statistically that’s not very likely, so– 
. . . why does he feel like he’s missing something right now, he thinks to himself, repressing a frown. What would he be missing? 
“Question: is this response proportional, or is this a ‘Code Superboy’ situation?” Cissie says. Cassie just groans all the more despairingly into her arms, not lifting her head at all. 
“This is a code black Superboy situation,” she says, and Cissie winces and pats her head again. Assuming their definition of “code black” aligns with Tim’s, that means “panic reaction; breakdown of mental/physical responses and capabilities”. So . . . yeah, that seems like a weird answer too. Just because Kon’s . . . what, outside and doing whatever he’s doing on his phone? While . . . wearing clothes? 
Tim really does not understand this conversation, yeah. 
Definitely a girl thing, he decides.
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yukioos · 6 days ago
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MIS
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SUMMARY: jayce talis x reader // your mother takes the brunt of the attack from jinx, causing your mother to pass from the wounds. her death leaves you grieving. once all your pain builds up and the pressure becomes too much to handle, you find yourself face-to-face with a panic attack. your boyfriend, jayce, stays with you throughout all your troubles and comforts you when you need him the most.
AUTHORS NOTE: hi! i hope you guys enjoy this oneshot, i felt in the mood to write some angst and comfort :) thanks for the request, sorry if you wanted me to write something more happy and fluffy. i haven’t had a panic attack so i don’t fully know what it’s like to have one, but i tried my best! this is 2.4k words
WARNINGS: not proofread, panic attack, death, grief, guilt, cussing, pet names
ASK: gurll i love this, for the next one can u please make it the other way around (jayce comforting reader) 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 i need jayce huggie toooo!!
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the sky was dark, and the moon was an unusually deep shade of red. the bland sky didn’t stand out to you, opposite to how it would be filled with stars any other day. hot air filled your room, causing you to tug and pull at your tightly fitted clothes. you threw old clothes onto the ground, planning to give them to the undercity, where they lacked what you perceived as normal. you giggled at the thought of your younger sister, caitlyn, who thought she was sneaky bringing in a woman from zaun into her room, claiming she was only hurt.
your mother didn’t know about this, however. she didn’t have enough time in her schedule to know about caitlyn’s relationships, only you and jayce’s, as word spread quickly. you were pleased to know that she accepted the relationship once she sat the two of you down and asked about jayce’s intentions with you. she just wanted you to have a good partner, someone who could live up to the kiramman expectations and life. knowing jayce ever since he was young, she immediately knew you were a perfect match.
when you were young, she wasn’t as busy being a councilor as she is now. you used to tell caitlyn about how mom used to be fun, and she would always laugh at the stories in disbelief. sometimes, she would flat-out tell you you were lying, like when your mom had enough time to teach you how to shoot targets. as she became older, her time with you became shorter and shorter, and caitlyn hardly knew her mother.
but even as you were scavenging through your dresser and walk-in closet, a sinking feeling weighed you down. something was off, something felt wrong, unusual. you rubbed your eyes, hoping you were just imagining when you saw a bright blue light shine through the sky like a shooting star. the sound of it flying through the air reminded you of fireworks before they explode. you tilted your head in curiosity. you had never seen a shooting star before—
suddenly, a loud sound erupted in your ears, causing you to duck and cover your head. you panted, whimpering as you had no idea what had just happened. you slowly raised your head from the ground, glancing around your room to see if any damage had been done. when you stood back on your feet, you glanced outside the window to see a huge hole in the administrative building where meetings were held.
fuck, that’s where jayce and mom were.
your eyes widened in terror as you immediately pushed your double doors open and down a flight of stairs. alarms began to alert the city of piltover, and screams and crying from citizens made your blood run cold. your legs ached from running, panting as your lungs burned with pain, unable to catch a breath. once you ran to the top floor of the administrative building, you slammed open the partially broken doors.
heart racing, you paused in your tracks once jayce carried viktor in his arms, with tears filling his eyes. your heart raced, and your throat tightened, you managed to ask, “where is my mother? mom? mom—“ as you walked around, searching for bodies covered in rubble, dark blue hair and short pink hair caught your eye.
you were about to walk over to them, but you staggered as smoke filled your throat, causing you to cough. before you could pause, a large, warm, and familiar hand laid on your shoulder. there, your boyfriend stood with ash on his face, and an almost dead man in his arms, his best friend. he cupped your face with one hand and stared at you, “hey— hey, we’re both alright, that’s— that’s good—”he tried to lighten the mood by chuckling. he then continued, even as his fake smile didn’t reach his eyes, “i need to help viktor—“
you interrupted, “jay, it’s okay, go, i think i see my mother—” you gazed into his glossy eyes, his lip trembled with fear.
you placed your shaky hand on his cheek and gave him a quick kiss. as you gently patted his cheek, he mumbled, “promise you’ll stay safe for me.” while looking into your equally terrified eyes.
you responded, “i will.” and with that, he ran to the science lab to supposedly heal viktor. you then ran over to the dark blue hair, assuming it was your sister. she turned around and hugged you without uttering a word. you gripped her back just as tightly, and the pink-haired zaunite stared at your mother with sorrow. her face was covered in ashes, and bricks left bruises and blood-stained clothes. you pressed your finger up to the side of her neck. once you felt nothing, you checked her wrist.
she didn’t have a pulse.
your breathing sped up, but your world slowed down as if it paused. your body felt numb, and your hearing drained from your ears. a hand squeezed your shoulder, the hand of your sister, trying to shake you back into reality. shutting your eyes for a moment, you tried to imagine anything but her lifeless body in front of you. the woman who lived her life saving and protecting others, the one who watched you grow up, the one who carried you for nine months, was now dead.
it seemed unreal to think about.
but you opened your eyes and imagined it was someone else in front of you, someone with less of an impact on your life. you slowly stood up and stared at your mother’s closed eyes and scarred face. you then turned your back on her and brought your eyes up to the two women in front of you. you mumbled, “we need a medic.”
the next few months after your mother’s death were a living hell. although it was sweet to see children placing flowers near your mother’s grave, honoring her dedication to the city, you hadn’t been in a healthy mental state. normally, things came easy to you. however, for the past few months, all you had heard from others were condolences for the death of your mother. you tried to act as if you weren’t bothered by it at all, and to continue your everyday life. that’s what your mom would’ve wanted you to do, anyway.
but as you were walking to your residence with jayce after spending time with one another at a restaurant, a news reporter came up to you. the man attracted many other reporters to huddle up in front of you, almost barricading you into the wall. you shuttered at the lack of space, and reporters yelled and stuck microphones and cameras into your face.
one asked, “miss kiramman, do you have any plans on becoming the leader of the kiramman house anytime soon?” as if it wasn’t a sensitive question, relating to your mom’s passing.
you frowned as another question followed, “how has your mother’s death affected you?”
“will you join the council to replace your mother’s spot?”
tears began to spring in your eyes as you backed up, becoming closer and closer to the wall. yet, the reporters wouldn’t stop asking questions and entrapped you, all around you, unable to move. suddenly your boyfriend loudly announced, “that is enough. go along with your day and leave.” his eyebrows were furrowed with concentration and he balled his fists up.
one of the reporters interjected, “mr. talis, all we want is to ask miss kiramman a couple questions—“
he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, then glared at the man. he suddenly understood and nodded, appearing embarrassed. they all followed after the man, who ran away once he saw councilor medarda, who wandered around the streets with her companion, lest.
jayce gently rubbed your shoulder with his large hand and mumbled, “sorry you had to see that. are you okay?” he knew you didn’t like talking about her death often, as it was recent and it’s all anyone would bother you about. however, when he saw your glossy eyes and your hands wiping them, he knew something was wrong. you hadn’t normally acted like this around him, nevertheless anyone.
you slightly nodded, just enough for jayce to see. you lowered your head, not wanting to be noticed by anyone else as jayce held the door open for you. a lock clicked behind you, and you traveled up the flight of stairs to your room. your heart pounded as you were reminded of the night when you saw your mother’s lifeless body on the ground, feeling like your heart was going to jump out of your chest. too much heat was in the room, maybe you had to open the window. you quickly sprinted over to the window and opened it, still feeling so hot all over your body.
god, everything was too much. you whimpered as you felt liquid dripping down your cheeks, and your throat began to tighten up as if barbed wires wrapped themselves around your neck. you wiped your forehead with your sleeve, only to feel the warmth on the cloth from sweat. ringing filled your ears, causing you to ball your fists up as you sat on the ground, starting to hit your head to stop the ringing. unfortunately, you couldn’t stop the noise in your head.
you couldn’t hear anything, and your body became numb. as your throat continued to tighten, you rubbed your throat in pain, wanting to tell your mom that you were sorry. why the hell weren’t you there when she was dying? you could’ve prevented her death, couldn’t you? maybe you could’ve blocked her body with yours from the hit, then you would’ve taken most of the damage. it would’ve been better that way. she was more influential, more powerful, and more important than you. what would’ve happened if you were there to save her? would you be at dinner right now? would you be hugging her? telling her a stupid joke she always laughed at? would you be dead?
it pained you that there was no way to know what could’ve happened.
jayce heard sobs as he washed his hands in the bathroom, screams, even. his heart raced and he dried his hands, then he ran out of your large bathroom to see your head in your hands, hitting it with your fists as hard as you could. you were sobbing, “i’m sorry, mom, i’m sorry,” repeatedly, over and over on a loop. your body shook like you were the most delicate thing in the world, like you were about to break any second. your arms dripped with sweat, and you seemed to be dissociative, as you didn’t respond to his calls of your name.
he then realized they were common signs of a panic attack. must’ve been from all the reporters bugging you with their never-ending questions and from the passing of someone so important in your life. he didn’t know how to handle a situation like this, but he knew you needed someone to help you and ground you. he gently placed a hand on the crown of your head and rubbed it gently, as if you were a child. you slowly looked up at him, eyes and face all red from crying. you sniffled, mind still racing, as you tried to focus on the words that came out of his mouth, not recognizing the ones that came out of yours.
you were full-on sobbing, dry tears laid helplessly on your skin, waiting to be rehydrated with new ones. you closed your eyes and cradled yourself, still crying out, ‘i’m sorry,’ so jayce slowly wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pulled you close, not knowing if he was doing the right thing. he asked, as he gave a kiss to your shoulder, “why are you sorry, sweetheart?” you unconsciously leaned into his warm frame, although you felt far too hot for your liking.
your wailing became quieter as you continued talking, listing all the reasons why you should’ve been the one who took the hit, you should’ve been better to her, you should’ve spent more time with her, and you should’ve been there before she died. he continued to ask you questions so you could open up about your feelings until your throat hurt from sobbing and talking for so long.
you leaned your head against him for a few minutes in silence, not wanting to say anything more. he rubbed your shoulder and turned, staring into your red eyes. you whimpered and wiped your eyes, staring up at him with a pout on your face. he softly smiled, then gently placed a hand on your wet cheek. he placed his lips against yours, the most intimate kiss you’ve shared. once the two of you pulled away, he helped you stand up, expecting to carry you to bed.
but to his surprise, you hugged him, causing him to stumble back with the amount of force you used. you mumbled into his chest, “i love you so much, jayce.” your voice was strained, using the rest of your words and power to thank him for his help and love.
he wrapped his strong arms around you and petted your hair, “i love you too.” he couldn’t have felt more affectionate or loving than now, and you felt the same. after a few minutes of staying in the hug, he slowly undressed you and changed you into more comfortable clothes. he carried you to your bed, then changed into his clothes that he kept in your drawers for when he stayed the night. he just changed into a pair of sweatpants, taking his shirt and everything else off.
turning the lights off, he walked over to you and pulled the sheets down, causing you to quickly huddle up to him and trap his leg with yours. you wrapped your arm around his waist, wanting to feel as close as you possibly could to him. as jayce’s breath began to even out, you knew he was the only one who could calm you down, bring you out of that headspace. he was nervous, he’d never comforted someone like that before, but his dedication and patience showed you he was the one for you.
127 notes · View notes
heavenlyvision · 11 months ago
Text
More than friends
Word Count: 21.9k
Pairing: Johnny Cage x F!Reader
Read part one ˗ˏˋhereˎˊ˗
A/N: Okie dokie ! It is finished,,, I hope you all enjoy it and that it lives up to your expectations. I apologise for it taking so long ! I've been struggling with motivation to write lately but I am pretty proud of this big one and thank you for being so patient !!! <33
Summary: Temporarily living with Johnny has it's challenges, especially since he still isn't being upfront about his feelings or your relationship.
Warnings: 18+ only, smut, mentions of anxiety/panic attacks, mentions of stalking (ex), alcohol consumption, minor harrassment (ex), mental instablity (ex), minor mentions of violence, arguments, mean!Johnny, possessive/jealous!Johnny, reader has a nightmare, masturbation, thigh riding, biting, cunnilingus, grinding, creampie (?), minor dacryphilia, vaginal fingering, minor overstimulation, no use of y/n
MDNI
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The past few days with Johnny have been good, you have mostly been watching movies and playing board games. He offered you a deal – for every movie you watch, you have to watch one of his after. A fine deal by any means… if you hadn’t already seen them. Being friends with Johnny means watching all of his movies at least once but it seems like staying here has given him the opportunity to make you watch them all again.
If he hadn’t been so kind and you weren’t so worried about being ungrateful or overstaying your welcome, you would complain and kick up more of a fuss but all in all, you don’t really mind. It’s not like his movies are bad… okay, some of them are definitely not good but he’s still in them so you don’t really mind. He’s a good actor and a good-looking man so it makes sitting through the lesser of his films bearable, that and he’s always so happy when you watch them together, how could you turn him down.
You needed a break from his movies though, which has resulted in a game of trivial pursuit and while you can’t prove it… you think he’s cheating, “This isn’t fun when it’s only two people playing,” you complain.
He’s leaning back on his palms and smiling cockily at you, you’re both sat facing each other with his coffee table in between, the game sat atop and looking at it, you can see just how far behind you are.
“You’re only saying that because you’re losing,” he snickers back at you.
You scowl at him, “Who knows things like…” you pick up another card and read it out, “When the first movie trailer was shown?”
He lightly rolls his eyes, “1913 and plenty of people would know that!”
“No! People don’t just know that?” You’re exasperated with him; he has to know that’s not common knowledge and it’s odd that he knows that off the top of his head.
He shrugs at you, smug smile on his face, “I guess I’m just that good.”
You squint at him, annoyed that he is apparently a trivia god, “Or just that odd.”
“I may be odd but you’re the one dying to get fucked by me,” he wiggles his eyebrows at you.
You groan at him and feel yourself grow hot in the face, “Whatever, just pick a new card.” You flick the card you’re holding at him and he laughs as it falls flat before hitting him.
He’s incredibly happy with himself, now using your desire for him as some kind of punchline. He’s not touched you again, not since the incident on the couch. It’s not like you’ve not made your move either, you’ve tried enticing him and every time he looks so close to folding before he gathers himself and moves forward. For a man who flirts relentlessly with you, he sure does have a lot of self-control.
Your phone buzzes on the table and you pick it up to look, face immediately twisting into an expression of displeasure.
“You good?” Johnny asks.
Placing your phone down, you look to him and answer, “Mhm, yeah… it’s just work.”
He raises a brow at you, “Again?”
You hum at him because yes, again.
Work has been messaging you fairly frequently to see if you’ve gotten ‘better’, you haven’t gone back yet, you used a few of your sick days so you could get some time off after the traumatic event of your ex breaking into and trashing your apartment but management seems to be getting pissy with you, so you will have to go back soon.
Something that had surprised you was Johnny also taking a few days off work to stay with you, you think he’s apprehensive about leaving you alone, which you can’t blame him… you don’t really want to be alone. You haven’t told him that though, you would never ask him to put you above his work.
Johnny sits up, no longer leaning on his hands, “What did they say?”
“They’re just asking how I feel… if I’m better,” you hesitate slightly, “I think I’ll go back tomorrow.”
“I don’t think you should.” He replies quickly.
This is not the first time he’s shown upset at the prospect of you going back to work, “I have to, I still have to pay for my apartment you know.”
He looks at you sincerely, “You know I would pay for anything you need me to.”
“And you know that I’m not comfortable with that,” you retort.
He’s offered to cover the cost of everything for you multiple times now and every time he brings it up, you shoot him down.
“I just don’t love the idea of you going back there, not with your ex still…” his face turns up in disgust, “Existing.”
You chuckle slightly, “It should be fine.”
You say that but you are worried about possibly running into him too, you don’t know if he’s still lingering around your neighbourhood or not. Which, speaking of your apartment, you’re waiting to hear back from your landlord on whether or not the door has been fixed.You’re also dreading having to go back though, you’ve been putting it off for days now. You were supposed to go back for pyjamas but instead Johnny has been letting you live in his shirts.
“Just take tomorrow off, one more day,” he gives you puppy dog eyes. When you don’t immediately reply, he adds, batting his eyelashes at you, “For me?”
Your lips downturn at his stupidity, “Ugh fine, just stop looking at me like that.”
He smiles brightly at you, “Cool! We can watch more of my movies tomorrow.”
You shoot back, “Don’t you have a job?”
“Making you watch all my movies is part of my job,” he jokes.
You whinge out at him, “But I’ve already seen them all~.”
“And now you’re watching them all again~,” he mocks you, smile big and with how proud of himself he is, the weight of his pride might crush you.
“You’re lucky I think you’re cute,” you grumble.
He chuckles at you, “Is that the only reason you’re watching all my movies? Because you want to sleep with me?”
“I’m not going to say you’re completely wrong,” you tease.
He places a hand over his heart, “Do you like any of my movies?”
“Your movies, or movies you’ve starred in?” You clarify.
He’s examining you carefully, “Both.”
You don’t have to think about it, “I like your movies,” you admit, “But you have starred in some questionable ones.”
He points a finger gun at you, “Touché.”
“Are we done playing yet?” You lament, referencing the almost forgotten game of trivial pursuit.
“Are you done pretending you still have a chance at winning?” He counters.
“Never.”
He rolls his eyes playfully at your stubbornness, “What if I said I’d fuck you right now if you’d admit you’ve lost.”
Your heart stutters in your chest and if you felt like he was being serious, you would fold and tell him he’s the all-time winner of trivial pursuit but you know him and you know he’s only teasing, “I’d tell you that you’re being mean and that I’d also sooner die before admitting premature defeat.”
“That’s a real shame,” he hums.
You’re getting annoyed with him; he keeps doing this to you. Relentlessly teasing you with no follow through, not even so much as a kiss. You get up on your knees and shuffle over to him, you end up right in his lap, his hands move to your hips instinctually.
He smirks at you, “And what are you trying to accomplish right now, doll?”
“You’ve been really mean, Johnny,” you pout at him.
“How can I fix it?” he asks.
You feel timid, shy, “You can stop pretending like the other night never happened.”
He’s serious as he answers, “I’m not pretending anything; I know it happened.”
“You’ve not even…” You trail off, now worried that you read into things too much and that you’re still just friends.
“Sugar, I’ve not stopped thinking about it,” he confesses.
You hesitate but probe, “So, you still want me?”
He almost has an air of confusion about him, baffled by your doubt, “Never stopped.”
“Then why haven’t you even kissed me again?” Your brows upturn at him.
His hand moves to hold your face, his thumb stroking high on your cheekbone, “Worried I’m not gonna be able to control myself.”
You lean into his hand slightly, “Don’t want you to.”
He groans, “See, you saying stuff like that doesn’t help,”
“Can I have one kiss?” you mimic the way he bat his eyelashes at you earlier, tacking on, “Please?”
He groans at you, pained, “How could I possibly say no?”
His hand on the the side of your face tilts your head and his lips brush over yours, the small contact electrifying to you. It feels like it’s been so long since he’s kissed you and being this close to him is making you dizzy. He teases you with his proximity, holding you close but never actually kissing you. Just as you’re about to huff out in annoyance at him, he pushes his lips to yours.
The kiss is hot, his mouth insistent and full, your shock gives him the chance to stick his tongue inside your mouth, licking at you. You moan into him, your body relaxing completely, incredibly content to be placated by his lips. His hand on your hip holds you tight, his fingers digging in, attempting to ground himself.
His own moans are muffled by the kiss, you’re affecting him just as much as he thought you would. He begrudgingly pulls away from you, knowing if he keeps kissing you, he’ll lose his mind and end up making you cum for him in anyway he can think of. You whinge as he pulls back and he can’t help the incredibly smug expression on his face at the sound, forever feeling self-pleased by how needy you are for him.
He purrs at you, “Happy?”
“You could make me happier,” you retort.
He only chuckles at you in response before asking, “You gonna admit to losing trivial pursuit?”
You frown at him, “Absolutely not!”
“Then sit your ass back over on your side of the coffee table and answer your question like a good girl,” his tone is a teasing kind of firmness.
You plant a single full kiss on his lips before crawling back over to your side, Johnny’s eyes stay glued to your ass as you shuffle across the carpet. His mind immediately filling with images of his cock pile driving into you while your back is arched for him. This was supposed to be a wholesome game and now he’s thinking of fucking you into the carpet while making you answer trivia questions.
You grumble at him, “You’re so mean to me.”
“I’d feel worse about it if you didn’t seem to enjoy it so much,” he’s incredibly glib right now, completely correct about his effect on you.
“You’re wrong,” you try denying.
“Really?” he raises a brow to you, “Because I seem to remember your pretty little pussy gripping my fingers awfully tight when I was ‘mean’ to you.”
Your face heats up again, “Just pick out a card,” you mumble.
His grin is Cheshire like, “Whatever you want, sugar.” He picks up a new card, “What is the literary term for a word that describes a sound?”
You know this one and you smile brightly, “Onomatopoeia!” you point at him excitedly.
He laughs at your excitement, “You got it.”
You have a small celebratory moment to yourself before you pull out a new card, “If you know this one I’m gonna scream.”
He’s confident in his trivia abilities, “Get ready to yell, doll.”
You read from the card, “What is the year of the first recorded flight?”
“1903,” he smiles cockily, completely sure that he’s right.
And he is, you glare at him and grumble out, “You’re correct.”
“I know,” his tone is self-satisfied.
You don’t win trivial pursuit but you do take pride in not giving up, you may not be good at trivia but you’re proud of yourself for seeing it through. Some may call it stubbornness but you think it shows strength to sit there and try like hell to win even when defeat is right in front of you. You gave it your best shot and you had fun. You will get better at trivia though… he won’t be winning next time. Not that you’re competitive or anything.
✰ ✰ ✰
In the morning you’re woken up by your phone buzzing by your head, sleepily you squint at your screen and see that it’s work trying to call you again. You grumble annoyed at how persistent they are but relent and answer.
“Are you feeling better yet?” Your managers voice is sharp and his question is straight to the point. You’re a bit taken aback by how direct and grumpy he is, you don’t even get to say anything before he continues, “Listen, we’ve been swamped here, unless you’re actively dying, it would be best if you came in. Best for you I mean.”
You don’t miss his threat, your job is now on the line if you don’t go in but with how he’s being such a dick you try to negotiate, “I can come in tomorrow.”
“Today would be best,” he sighs, you don’t answer him and he grunts at you, “Fine, come in tomorrow, if you’re not in tomorrow, you’re getting cut from the roster.”
“Alright, see you–” he didn’t even let you finish your goodbye; he’s already hung up on you. Bastard.
You stare up at the ceiling, your mood for the day already completely ruined, you feel badly because you know you’re lying to work and they do need help but you’re also having a hard time bringing yourself to leave Johnny’s apartment, let alone go back to your neighbourhood. The thought of him being there sends a cold spike of anxiety through you, he did all that to your home, what is he planning to do to you? It’s a frightening thought.
You lay motionless on your mattress for a while, too anxious to go back to sleep but also too tired to get up. Clattering can be heard in the kitchen though and you’re concerned as to what Johnny is attempting to do so you haul yourself up, out of the bed and into his kitchen.
When you make your way into the main area you can see Johnny making pancakes… you think? Mostly, it just looks like he’s making a mess, “What are you doing?”
“Shit–” He jumps at the sound of your voice, dropping the spatula he was holding onto the ground, “I wasn’t expecting you to be awake so early,” he mumbles out as he bends down to retrieve it.
Your tone is amused as you ask again, “What are you doing?”
“Making breakfast,” he sighs.
You walk over to him and see he’s made a complete mess of the kitchen; he’s used far too many bowls for what he’s made. He also seems to have made up some pancake mix two separate times before using the one he is holding now.
You come up beside him and look over what he’s doing, “Why did you make so much mix?”
“The other ones had a weird texture,” he’s focusing hard on tipping some of the mix into the pan.
You want to comment on how he could be doing things better but you’re so appreciative of his efforts and you don’t want to sound like a know it all. But you can’t help but cringe as the bowl slips a bit and gets all over his hand.
He groans out, “I dunno how you did this so effortlessly, I’m killing myself here, doll.” You’re distracted by how he lifts his hand to his mouth and licks some of the batter off, he notices and smiles at you knowingly, moving his hand in front of your face he asks, “Want a taste, sugar?”
Wordlessly, your wrap your lips around his index finger, sucking it clean. Johnny groans at the sight of it, not expecting you to be so willing, he was only joking around but now you’re gently suckling on his finger and he’s about to pass out over it.
You pull back slowly and kiss the tip of his finger when you’re done cleaning it. He’s looking at you like you’ve hung the moon and stars in the sky and you can only huff out an amused laugh at him.
“Move over,” you shoo him away, “I will make the pancakes, you can start cleaning up,” you reach out for the mixing bowl he was holding.
He hands it to you reluctantly, “I was trying to make breakfast for you.”
“And I appreciate it so much but you’re going to make a mess of yourself if you continue,” you place the bowl off to the side and flip the pancake that was still in the pan, it’s too thick and also a little extra crispy thanks to the both of you getting distracted.
He comes up behind you, his arms trapping you against the bench, he leans in over your shoulder, “Would you clean me up if I did?” His words are suggestive, far from innocent.
You turn it back on him, “Would you let me?”
His head drops to your shoulder, resting there, “I want to, doll. Bad.”
“You’re the only one stopping it,” you hum out, focusing on the task at hand, trying to ignore how close he is to you.
He stays close to you as you make the pancakes, his hands move from the bench to your hips, his hands hold onto you, lightly pawing at you, “Why are you up so early anyways? I thought I had more time.”
“Work called me again, woke me up,” you mutter, already knowing Johnny’s going to be pissed that they’ve rung you again.
“Was it that asshole again?” He asks, referencing your manager.
You flip a pancake over in the pan, “Yeah, they’re short staffed and need my help.”
Johnny’s arms wrap around you more, holding you to him as his head turns into your neck, “I hope you said no.”
“I did but I feel bad, I have to go in tomorrow,” you tell him.
“You do not, not if you aren’t ready to be back there,” his arms squeeze you just the tiniest bit tighter, comforting you. He knows how frightened you are to go back to that neighbourhood.
One of your hands reaches down and holds his hand for a moment, “I appreciate the sentiment but I do have to go back, he threatened my job.”
“He what?” Johnny bristles behind you, moving to stand tall, turning you around to face him, “What the hell did he say?”
“It’s nothing that bad, he just said it would be ‘best’ for me if I came in tomorrow,” you wince slightly as you repeat your managers message.
Johnny’s scowl deepens, severely pissed off with your manager, “He’s such a dick, I don’t like him.”
“Not many people do but I can also understand his frustrations at the moment, plus… I’m not even sick, so…” You feel sheepish and you turn away from him, pouring the last of the batter into the pan.
Johnny scoffs from behind you, “So what? As far as he’s concerned you are sick and it’s not like you’re taking the time off for kicks. After what you’ve been through, you deserve some time off.”
He’s making you feel emotional, you don’t like thinking about what happened too hard, it’s still too fresh. You purse your lips and focus on the pancake sizzling in the pan instead of the slight burn in your eyes from holding back tears.
He places his hand on your shoulder, “You deserve to go to work without fear.”
Now why did he go and say that? You can’t help but cry silently as you flip the pancake, you’re trying so hard to hide it, blinking away your tears as soon as they form. Johnny knows though, he knows he touched a sore spot for you but he was genuinely only trying to help.
“Oh doll,” he sighs out at you, pulling you into his arms. You turn into him and cling on, needing the comfort right now. He lets you cry into his shirt for a moment, your tears no doubt soaking into the fabric. His hands rub up and down your back, trying to soothe you.
You remember the pancake though and sniffle into his shirt, “The pancake is going to burn.”
He takes the spatula from you and flips it onto the plate, “All better,” he places the utensil back down and moves his other hand back to you, “You worry about the silliest of things.”
You laugh dryly into him, “So do you.” He holds you in his kitchen for a bit as you will yourself to stop crying, you’re worried about the pancakes getting cold, “Hot pancakes are better than cold ones.”
His hands stop moving on your back and his head tilts down to you, “Is that your way of telling me you want to eat the pancakes now?”
“I am worried about them getting cold,” your face is still pressed into his shirt, your words slightly mumbled.
He shrugs at you, “I’m not.”
You make a face that he can’t see, it’s one of displeasure, “You should be… cold pancakes are bad.”
He dismisses, “They aren’t that bad.”
You’re still teary eyed but you pull back and look at him with as serious an expression as you can muster, “Cage… don’t eat cold pancakes.”
He smiles at you, happy to see your face again. His hand cups the side of your face, “There she is, my pretty doll.”
His words make your skin grow hot and you look away, he’s smiling big though, always happy to embarrass you.
You look at the pancakes on the bench, “Let’s just eat, yeah?”
“Whatever you want, sugar,” he pulls his hand away but not before booping the tip of your nose gently.
You sigh at him but move around the kitchen getting ready to plate out breakfast, Johnny comes up to your side and stops you, “Go sit down, I’ll plate it up.”
“But–”
“Don’t ‘but’ me, you ended up making them all so go sit down,” he points over to the breakfast bar.
You want to argue with him, about how you didn’t put nearly as much effort into making them as he did. How he did the most annoying part but based on the look on his face, you wouldn’t be able to convince him to let you plate it up anyways. So, you sulk away and around the bench, perching yourself atop the stool and wait for him to give you your pancakes.
As you watch him move around the kitchen something occurs to you, “Did you tell me the wrong cabinet when I was first here just so you could see my ass?”
He stands to face you, his smile sly but his tone faux offended, “I would never do that, how dare you.”
You roll your eyes at him and his response, “You would do that.”
“Can you blame me? You’ve got one hell of an ass, sugar,” he places your plate down in front you, wiggling his eyebrows as he does.
You try to be offended but you end up feeling complimented, “Thank you,” he smiles deviously at you and you squint back at him, “for the pancakes, not your gross compliment.”
“Ah, but you took it as a compliment,” he throws a wink your way, his demeanour pleased.
You roll your eyes at him and eat your pancakes, they aren’t bad. He did an alright job with the batter… third times the charm, it was just the actual cooking part he seemed to have the most issues with. Well… that and the mess he made.
You realise he spent his time clinging to you instead of cleaning like he was supposed to, “You didn’t clean…”
“I got distracted,” he mumbles, mouth full.
Not looking at him, you reply, “You do that a lot.”
“Stop living here and it won’t be a problem anymore,” he nudges your arm with his elbow.
“Alright,” you agree easily, you’re only staying for as long as you’re welcome.
Johnny doesn’t flinch, “No.”
You turn to look at him, questioning look on your face, “No?”
He still doesn’t look to you, mindlessly eating his breakfast as he explains, “Yeah, no. Keep staying here, I don’t mind being distracted.” He turns to you and smiles, “I like it, actually.”
His smile and words fluster you; you’re still concerned about overstaying your welcome though. Turning back to your food you mutter, “If you get sick of me and need me to leave, tell me, I’ll go.”
“You are always welcome in my home, not gonna ask you to leave, doll,” he picks up his plate and walks into the kitchen, stopping behind you to press a kiss to the crown of your head, “Not now or in the future, stay as long as you like…” he puts his plate in the sink, “…hell, stay forever.”
“I’m not staying forever,” you giggle, taking it as a joke.
He smiles fondly at you, “Do whatever you like, you’re always welcome here.”
✰ ✰ ✰
Waking up is hard, especially since you know you have a shift later, one you are none too keen to do. Images of your ex grabbing at you, of you punching him, the feeling of the impact, it’s all still so fresh in your mind and the idea of maybe running into him, or worse, him waiting for you, is horrifying. You might have to look for a new job but you like where you are, you like your co-workers. It’s also convenient, within walking distance from your apartment but now think that may not be such a bonus anymore, especially if you decide to move.
You’ve been considering getting a new place but your apartment is rent controlled and a decent price and it’s close to everything, moving is such a hassle but the idea of going back there and living day to day life frightens you. You’ll be constantly on edge in that apartment, you know what needs to be done but that doesn’t make it easy.
Lying in bed and thinking about this isn’t going to make it better though, you’re just stressing yourself out. You groan dramatically to the empty room as you pull yourself out of bed, your limbs feel heavy. If you had your way, you’d stay in bed a little longer but you know Johnny will be leaving for work soon and you want to see him before he goes.
You find him looking like a mess in the hallway, trying to shuffle himself out the door, his phone is balanced between his ear and shoulder, fingers fiddling with the buttons on his shirt. He smiles when he sees you, mouthing a good morning. You smile back at him and shoo his hands away from his shirt, one drops to his side and the other hold his phone properly.
There’s some kind of issue with one of the actors in his films, you could probably gather more if you weren’t distracted by his skin peeking out from under his shirt. His voice is stern on the phone, a tone you’ve only heard a handful of times, one that’s rarely, if ever, directed at you. You want him to stay home and have his way with you right now but you’re starting to gather that the begging isn’t really working as well as you want it to, that and you do actually have to go back to work today.
When you’ve buttoned his shirt you pat his chest, he mutes his side of the call and holds his phone away from his ear, “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” you’re fighting to keep your eyes on his and not look at his lips.
His free hand holds the side of your face, “I’ll be back late today,” he looks away from you for a second, “I’d prefer if you didn’t go in today, I might not be available if you need me.”
You roll your eyes at him lightly, “I probably won’t need you, plus my shift is only short and I need money.”
“I can give you money,” his tone is slightly exasperated, his hand moves to hold your shoulder.
“I don’t want your money,” the idea of taking money from him, while also living in his home… is uncomfortable, you don’t care if he’s offering, you are not taking his money.
He looks you over carefully, ignoring the voice coming from his phone, “You really not going to take another day?”
“Nope, I can’t… not without risking my job,” you place your hands on your hips and raise a brow at him, you told him this yesterday.
His head rolls back and he groans a bit, the hand on your shoulder shakes you slightly, “Fine, but finish early and come straight back here,” his face pulls up in disgust, “I hate that, that little rat of a man is still out and about.”
Your lips twist from holding in a laugh, your hand salutes him as you say, “Yessir.”
He squints at you before putting his phone back to his ear, unmuting himself, the person on the other end had started to yell at him through the phone, “I am coming! Geez…”  He spins to leave but quickly turns around and presses a kiss to your lips, “I’ll see you later,” he rushes out the apartment after that.
You’re left shocked, staring at the door he just left out of. It’s not the first time you’ve kissed… obviously but the casualness of it has your stomach erupting in butterflies. He kissed you like it was the most natural thing, like it was a part of your routine, like you’re a couple. Your relationship with him has left you completely confused but how he doubled back just to kiss you goodbye has you smiling to yourself like an idiot all morning.
✰ ✰ ✰
The trip to work is nerve wracking, you’re worried about being back, you’re extra cautious of everyone around you, eyes scanning every face quickly, it’s not until you’re actually at work and can hide in the backroom do you feel the slightest bit better. Having people around you and being behind the counter puts you at ease, it’ll at least be harder for your ex to get at you, hopefully he doesn’t show up though.
You’re waiting the extra few minutes for your shift to start, as you sit and stare at your feet, you see another pair approach and stop in front of you. You’re scared it’s your manager but as you lift your head up to look, you realise it’s just one of your co-workers. Your shoulders drop, relaxing, knowing that you aren’t about to be scolded for you absence.
Your co-worker smiles down at you, “You’re back! Are you feeling better?”  
He is so chipper compared to your general unease about everything, “Ah, hey Michael, yeah… I’m all better,” you give him a polite smile.
“Are you sure? You don’t look so well…” he leans down slightly, as if to examine you closer before moving out of your personal space, “Sorry! I didn’t mean that in a bad way, you still look great! Beautiful, even… uhm, what I mean is… you just look a little run down,” his hand awkwardly scratches at the back of his neck.  
“I’m alright… thanks though?” You’re a little confused and aren’t sure what the appropriate response to him would be.
Michael is a nice guy and you’ve known him for a bit now, long enough to consider him a friend but he’s horribly awkward around you sometimes and you can’t figure out why, or what the suitable way to react to him would be.
He stands in front of you, rocking on his heels slightly, hands stuffed into his pockets, “I can take most of the orders and serve if you like? So, you don’t have to talk to as many people. You can hang back and wipe tables and stuff, the work people do when there is no work,” he laughs lightly.
You protest, if it’s been as busy as your manager says then you don’t want to put it all on Michael, “You don’t have to do that!”
He waves his hand dismissively at you, “It’s not been that busy, I’m happy to do it.”
The offer he makes sounds perfect to you, normally you would protest more but the risk of having to serve your ex is high and Michael has just unknowingly given you an out, “That… would actually be great, thank you. If things get busy though I will be on top of it!”
“Don’t worry about it, take it slow and let me know if you need me to cover for you or something… like if you need an extra break,” he’s still shuffling on his feet but he’s calmed a bit, “To be honest, if you aren’t feeling well, I don’t think you should be here.”
“Tell that to big boss man,” you snark out humourlessly.
His face pulls up in a sympathetic grimace, “He call you in, huh?”
“Yeah, he said you guys have been really busy and not so subtly threatened my job if I didn’t come in,” you wear a smile that doesn’t reach your eyes as you speak, sharing the bitten back annoyance you feel towards your manager.
Michael rolls his eyes, “That sure is one of his favourite moves, you know he wouldn’t have fired you though, too many of us would also leave if he fired you for being unwell.”
He’s right, most people would walk out, you know you would but you also don’t doubt your managers hubris, he probably would have fired you just to prove a point, even if it caused him to lose other employees too.
You half smile at him, “I dunno, I think he would fire me still, I also wouldn’t want people to leave here because of me, the pay is too good compared to other service jobs.” You glance to the clock behind his head and place your hands to your knees, pushing yourself up, “Oh well, time to start.”
Michael rolls his head and groans slightly, dreading the shift as much as you, “Great,” he looks to you again, “Seriously though, take it easy and let me know if you need anything.”
You smile and thank him again before the both of you clock on and walk out of the backroom.
The first half of your shift is uneventful, everything is quiet for the most part, busy your ass. Michael kept true to his offer and has been manning most of the orders while you hang back and make the odd drink or coffee, which you don’t mind, human interaction is not something you were looking forward to today and you somehow always end up with the weirdest customers.
The customers today, however, are mostly older people, you notice that there are only a few other people working, which is odd. The place is a small café/restaurant kind of gig, it’s nice but it can get busier and it can get busy quick, so you’re surprised by how slow it is today.
While you’re on your ten-minute break, your manager approaches you, “Glad to see you back.”
“It is good to be back,” you try to be as inoffensive as possible but you think your disdain for him is something that cannot be easily hidden.
He stares blankly at you for a moment, “Can you stay back today? Our closer called out.”
You remember Johnny’s words and how he had asked you to come back early, “I don’t think–”
“–It would be helpful, if you could, otherwise Michael will be alone.”
“Michael is staying back too?” You’re confused, normally you’d both be swapped out, actually, normally there would be at least another server on around this time.
Your manager looks exasperated with all this back and forth, “Yeah he’s already covering for someone else.”
Damn, Michael is such a pushover and you feel bad for him, you know you said to Johnny you would go straight back to his after your shift but you feel bad for your co-worker, that and the extra money is pretty enticing after not coming to work for a bit… plus… you still technically would be going straight back to Johnny’s, it would just be a little bit later.
You sigh out before answering, “I suppose I can stay back.”
“That’s great, thank you, take an extra ten,” he pats your shoulder and shuffles off.
You guess what he meant by “swamped” was actually “understaffed”, sounds like a lot of the servers have been calling out. Which kind of has you understanding his frustrations with you, you’re still pissed at him for handling it poorly though.
You use the extra ten-minutes to sit and zone out, staring at the bleak wall of the backroom. Distantly, you consider messaging Johnny to tell him you’ll be back later than you thought but he’s also meant to be late, so chances are, you’ll get back before him.
Before you have more time to think about it though, your break is up and you’re heading back out onto the floor. The hours tick by… so… slowly, the afternoon picks up a bit in business and you help with serving but then it dies down again not long after and you’re back to a coffee every now and again and cleaning.
The bell on the door dings as it swings open and closed, Michael greets them, their voice catches your attention and as you look at them, your blood runs cold. Your ex has just walked through the door and moved to sit at a table, Michael goes over to take his order and your heart feels like it’s about to pound out of your chest.
You aren’t sure what you should do, the cops weren’t helpful last time and you don’t want them coming to your place of work, you’re frightened and uncertain of what to do. He looks to you and you catch his gaze, he smiles at you and wiggles his fingers in greeting, you frown back at him and storm off to the backroom, giving yourself time to calm down.
Deep breaths in and out, in… and out… you focus on things around you, the feel of the wall under your palm, how your feet feel in your shoes, how your apron scrunches in your fist, your racing heart calms down, slowing to a more reasonable pace. You roll your head and crack your neck, trying to remove the stiffness in your bones, you think about Johnny, you think about how safe he makes you feel and you think about calling him. You won’t, you don’t feel like you should, he’s busy today and he said he would be unreachable… and you’re worried about what he may do, how it may upset him that you’ve agreed to stay back later.
Your energy is better spent calming down and pretending like your ex has not upset you, it’s a power move on his behalf, showing up here, he’s trying to scare you and while it is working, you are not going to let him know that, he will not be getting anything more out of you. He doesn’t deserve any sort of satisfaction, what he does deserve is another smack to the head but you will control that urge too, you really need your job.
Taking one last deep breath, you leave the room and go back to doing the odd jobs cleaning up, you continue your shift, ignoring him the whole time, you don’t even look at him, all of your focus is put into whatever you’re doing in that moment. You can feel him watching though, he stays the whole of your shift, watching you and hoping you’ll look his way, he makes your skin crawl.
Towards the end of your shift, when you’re closing up and everyone has left, Michael approaches you, “That guy from earlier, he comes in a lot lately and he’s usually fine… but today he was unsettling, he wouldn’t stop watching you,” he pauses and looks out the front window, “and I think he’s waiting outside.”
You groan, this is something you would rather not have to tell anyone about but since he’s picked up on it and you really don’t want to leave alone, you confide in Michael, “He’s my ex… and he’s been stalking me? Of sorts… it’s why I hadn’t come to work for a bit, I was worried he would come here.”
He makes a shocked face, “That’s horrific, have you told someone?”
“The cops know but they’re about as helpful as nipples on men,” you’re completely frustrated and you also don’t want to talk too in depth about this.
He chuckles at your statement, caught off guard by it, “Sorry, this is not funny but I’ve not heard someone say that before while also looking so serious.”
You also crack a smile, it was the first thing that came to your mind, it is a bit ridiculous, “It’s fine, it’s a stupid saying.”
“Definitely true though,” he adds before his expression turns more serious, sympathetic to you,  “I am so sorry this has been happening to you… you don’t deserve this, can I do anything to help? Do you want me to give you a lift home?”
You appreciate his offer deeply and while maybe you would accept it if you were staying at yours, you don’t feel comfortable giving him Johnny’s address, “No, that’s okay, I’ve been staying with a friend so I’m just gonna catch a cab to their place.”
“Are you sure? Do you want me to at least wait with you?” He seems a little apprehensive at leaving you on your own.
“I would like that, please,” you don’t want to wait on the side of the road by yourself, not with him right outside.
The pair of you walk outside together after double checking everything is packed away properly, Michael makes sure he’s on the side your ex is when you leave the building, not wanting him to possibly get at you. Your ex only watches, he doesn’t approach you, he just stands there, you don’t know what he’s doing but you feel like he may be waiting for you to be left alone.
You don’t speak, you don’t have anything to say, you’re trying your best to not show how unsettled by him you are, all of your focus put into keeping yourself calm. The sound of a lighter flickering is oddly loud in the quiet street, cigarette smoke lingers in the air, your ex has lit up a cigarette and the smell is making you feel sickly, though that might just be his presence altogether.
Michael places an arm around you before leaning in, “Are you okay? You sure I can’t just give you a ride?”
“No, I’m fine, thank you,” you smile at him and then pull out your phone, getting ready to order a cab.
A loud car is speeding up the street, the sounds make you roll your eyes, asshole, you think. It’s getting closer though, and then it’s pulling over right in front of you. The expression on your face is annoyed, pissed off, you want to curse out the asshole driving like a dick, you even go so far as opening your mouth to say something but as they get out of the car, you realise it’s Johnny, and then you’re shocked silent, your mouth closing very suddenly.
Michael is just as shocked and confused, his arm coming off you as he asks, “Holy fuck, is that Johnny Cage?”
Johnny walks straight to you, ignoring Michael, “Are you okay? Why are you still out? I told you to come back early,” his brows are set in a deep frown, eyes scanning you quickly, hands holding your face tenderly.
“I’m fine and I got asked to stay back, I was about to catch a cab–”
“–Why didn’t you call me?” His hands come off your face but one of them reaches down to your hand and grips it in his.
“You said you were going to be busy and unreachable,” you shrug, you know you could’ve sent a text or something but you didn’t want to be a nuisance, not when it seemed like his start to the day was already rocky.
“Not that unreachable,” he sighs, he looks around your surroundings properly, you think he may finally take notice of Michael who has been very patiently waiting to be acknowledged.
You try prompting an introduction, “Uhm, this is my co-worker, Michael.”
“Why the fuck is he here,” Johnny ignores your words, gaze set off to the side where your ex is, his hand grips yours a little tighter, he moves closer to you, glaring at your ex.
You don’t want there to be a scene, you want what you wanted before, you want to leave and go back to Johnny’s, you just want to feel safe again, “Johnny–”
“–How long has he been here for?” He barely glances back at you, still staring your ex down.
“Most of her shift,” Michael answers for you, it makes you cringe because you know Johnny is going to have a lot of thoughts about you not telling him.
Johnny finally acknowledges his presence, “What?”
“He’s been here all day… and then he was hanging around after close…” Michael looks to you, “Did I say something wrong?” He asks you a bit quieter.
“No, you’ve done nothing wrong,” you get Johnny may be a little on edge and severely pissed at your ex but he’s being overtly hostile towards Michael for no reason.
Johnny hums, “Get in the car, doll.”
You prompt him, “Johnny,” he looks to you and you keep talking, “Don’t do anything, I just want to leave.”
Johnny scowls, thinking on it for a moment, wanting so badly to walk those few steps over to your ex and beat the fuck out of him, he looks back to you and sees the way your eyes plead with him and he recognises you’ve probably had the worst day of work in your life, the psychological torture of having your ex watch your every move exhausting and frightening.
He concedes to you, “Fine, we’ll just leave.” He turns around to open the car door for you.
You turn to Michael and place a hand on his shoulder, “Sorry about everything and seriously, thank you for today, you made it easier being here.”
“Anytime, I hope the cops do something about your ex soon, I hate that you’re going through this,” he looks worried for you and you can’t blame him but you think Johnny does enough worrying about you for ten people.
“Have a good night,” you pat his shoulder before walking to the car.
“Hey!” He calls out to you before you sit down, “Uhm, if you need anything, text me.”
You smile at him as Johnny closes the car door, you give him a thumbs up from inside the car, you don’t think you’ll ask for his help but it’s kind of him to offer, he’s a very giving person.
Johnny takes a bit longer to get in the car, it doesn’t look like he says anything to Michael but he stares at him for a bit. When he does get inside the car, he wordlessly starts the engine and drives you both back to his. It’s tense and it feels like you’re in trouble, your leg is bouncing up and down with your nerves and he reaches over to you, placing his hand on your thigh, attempting to comfort you.
It works, slightly, you would feel better if he broke his silence and got his thoughts all out now but you know he’s going to wait until you’re both back at his apartment. His thumb rubs along your skin, soothing you, it calms you enough to sit still the rest of the drive.
Still, no words are spoken the whole way up to his apartment, nothing other than your small thank yous when he opens a door for you, mostly you trail behind him. When you reach the door he lets you in first, locking it and walking into the living room, you linger awkwardly but ultimately follow after him.
He must hear you follow because he doesn’t turn around as he asks, “What were you thinking? Your ex shows up while you’re working and not only do you not think to tell me, you also stay the whole shift and even work late?” He’s exasperated, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose.
You shuffle into the room more, “…We are understaffed and I didn’t want to make Michael handle that on his own, plus it’s good money… and I need the money, so I can pay for the apartment.”
He turns around to look at you, “But you didn’t tell me any of that? Just left me in the dark to come home to an empty apartment?”
Your brows knit together, starting to get frustrated with him, “You said you were going to be unreachable, of course I wanted to call you as soon as I was asked to stay back, as soon as he showed up, but I thought about your words this morning… and honestly, I thought of how you’re reacting right now!”
“So, you rely on some stranger?” His hands gesture angrily.
“Who?” you’re confused.
He grimaces, “The fucker with you tonight.”
“Michael?” He nods and you make a perplexed face back at him, “He’s not a stranger? He’s my co-worker and I have known him for a bit now,” you hesitate before adding quietly, “He’s a friend.”
Johnny crosses his arms and raises a brow at you, “A friend, like how I’m a friend?”
“What–”
He cuts you off, not even letting you ask your question, “­–Like how you’re begging me to fuck you any chance you get, kind of friend?”
You’re deeply frustrated with him, you don’t like his tone, or attitude, “What are you attempting to imply right now?”
“Nothing, I’m not implying anything,” he glowers at you, nothing secret about how he’s feeling right now, everything he feels is on his face.
He’s cutting you deep, your feelings run deeper for him than just physically and he has to know that by now, “I feel like you’re being incredibly unfair, I like you a lot and I want you in more than just one way.” You wrap your arms around yourself, pulling back from him.
He doesn’t say anything, he just stands there looking at you, still angry for no good reason. You turn around and leave him there, if you stay here looking at him while he does nothing but glare at you, you’ll cry.
You’ve just told him how you feel, you were honest and he doesn’t give you the same courtesy, not just now but ever, he’s not told you how he honestly feels and you can only put up with that for so long. You’re not a dog with a bone but he makes you feel like one, saying sweet nothings to you but not actually saying what he means or how he feels.
You head back to the guest room and flop onto the bed, allowing yourself a moment to sob, you’ve had such a shitty day and you wanted more than anything to come back here and tell Johnny about it, to be held by him while he told you everything is going to be okay. Now, you’re not only just upset about your workday, you’re also pissed at Johnny for how he just treated you.
From in your back pocket, your phone vibrates.
✰ ✰ ✰
You don’t really know how you’ve ended up here… well, you do, some of the girls from your college course invited you to a party and you were pretty keen to jump at the idea of escaping all your thoughts for the evening, you have tomorrow off so what’s the harm? Is what you had thought. You ended up sneaking out of Johnny’s apartment and ubering to the address you were given, from there it’s all a bit more hazy, you’ve been drinking a lot. Not typically something you do but you think after the day you’ve had, you earned it.
You do remember you left a note for Johnny to find, telling him you were fine and would be back late, you initially weren’t going to leave him anything but you thought that would be unkind, plus, it would only serve to worry him. Which, you genuinely don’t want him to stress about you so much, you are perfectly capable of caring for yourself, you’ve done it this long.
The night started out fun, drinking and dancing with these girls, but now you’re past drunk and they are nowhere to be seen. The people around you are getting handsy too, now that you’re alone on the dancefloor you’re an easier target. All the people in your personal space is starting to get to you and you end up pushing through the crowd of people to try and find some familiar faces.
It feels like you search the whole house twice but you can’t seem to find any of them, which is odd, you don’t know where they went or why they haven’t so much as messaged you about where they are. If you weren’t so far gone, you might worry about them more but the world is starting to spin a bit and you find yourself walking out the front and sitting on the stairs, you’re alone out here, well, alone besides the few people passed out on the lawn but you don’t think you’re going to count them.
The fresh air will hopefully help you feel better, you pull out your phone to order an uber and see a bunch of missed calls and texts from Johnny. You go to swipe the notification away but accidentally press it and your phone starts calling him back. Your attempts to hang up before he answers fail, especially since he picks up so quickly, the line barely ringing twice.
Johnny sounds pleased and pissed off to hear from you, “Thank god! Where the hell are you?”
“It said in mm note, at friends party,” your words are coming out slurred even though you’re trying to sound sober.
You can almost feel his glare through the phone, “Your note was stupid, why did you leave without telling me?”
You counter, “Would you have let me leave?” He doesn’t say anything, the other end of the phone in complete silence, “Exactly, plus mm still mad at you,” you state.
His tone is scrutinising, “Are you drunk?”
You ask him stupidly, “Are you?”
“What? Obviously not?” He sighs into the phone, irritated by you, “Just tell me you’re safe at least.”
“Mmmm, I think so? I dunno… actually can you come get me? I dunno where mm friends are and I don’t wanna be here anymore,” you lean your head to your shoulder, closing your eyes for a second.
He sounds relieved, “Yes, I can come get you, send me the address.”
You like listening to him talk, “You have a nice voice, sometimes when you talk it gives me butterflies in my tummy…” your words are lazy and you trail off.
Johnny urges you, “Hey, focus, tell me where you are, doll.”
“At a friend’s house… hmm hold on,” you think he may still be talking but you’ve pulled your phone away from your ear to text him the address, you hold the phone to your ear again, “Did ya get that?”
“Yeah I did, I’ll be there soon okay, hang tight.”
“Mm not moving, too comfy,” your head rests back to your shoulder, your eyes slow blinking with how tired you’re getting.
Your eyes slip closed and you switch between hearing all the things around you and hearing nothing at all, your head is somehow swimming with every thought you’ve ever had and not a single thing. You rub at your eyes, trying to stay awake and present but you lose the fight and they slip closed again.
You aren’t sure how much time passes but it feels like no time at all has gone by when Johnny shakes you awake, him standing in front of you so soon feels like a hallucination, he leans down to you and your hand reaches up and pokes his chest.
He makes a confused face at you, “What was that for?”
“Jus checking you’re real,” you murmur out.
“Jesus, sugar,” he shakes his head at you, “Come on, let’s get you home,” he reaches down to you.
“Mmkay,” you take his hand and he pulls you up, you fall into him slightly.
He walks you back to his car carefully, worried about your balance the whole time, his hands stay on you, assisting your steps.
“I’m glad you called,” he says.
You mutter back at him, “Didn’t mean to, fingers are stupid.”
He huffs at you lightly, “Okay, well…I’m glad you asked me to come get you.”
You’re hesitant, “Thank you… for coming,” your lips are downturned, still pissed off at him but grateful all the same.
He opens his car door for you, the second time today and you get inside, “I’ve said it before… but I’ll always come… when you call.” He leans over to buckle you in, when he pulls back his fingers hold your chin, “You just have to call me.”
You’re still pouting and you look away from him, he makes you weak and you’re not ready to forgive him, especially when he’s not apologised, “Can we jus leave?”
He sighs softly to himself, “Yeah… let’s leave.”
He gets you both back to his in one piece, you felt a bit dizzy in the car but you’re feeling sturdier by the time you’re back in his apartment. He leads you into the kitchen and gets you a glass of water, he makes you drink it all in front of him.
You watch him as he takes the glass from you and puts it in the dishwasher, you feel tempted to tell him, “Mm still mad at you.”
He holds onto the edge of the bench, “I know.”
“You really hurt me,” you add.
“I know,” he repeats.
His unwillingness to look at you or give you a better answer has you tearing up, “Are you even sorry?”
He still won’t turn your way, the sink more interesting apparently, “We can talk more tomorrow, it’s late and you’re drunk.”
“I’ve never been more sober in my life,” you argue.
“I somehow doubt that,” is all he says.
You roll your eyes at him, you’ve had enough, “Whatever, thanks again… for picking me up,” you leave the kitchen after that, not willing to stay and let him ignore you more.
You just want to collapse into bed and pretend like everything is fine, you want to pretend you’re back to a couple days ago, when you and Johnny were playing trivial pursuit. You want to think of how kind he was to you yesterday, when you cried in his kitchen while making pancakes and you’re not going to think about how he implied you were interested in sleeping with all your friends and minimised your feelings for him.
Talking to him again is not something you’re looking forward to, not if tonight is anything to go by, he takes up such a large place in your heart and to be treated like this by him feels… shattering. He’s always been so kind to you and to be spoken to like this, it’s devastating, you want to understand but you also want him to leave you alone for a bit, you’re not certain you’re ready to listen to whatever he has to say.
In your very slowly sobering state, you manage to get yourself into the shower and fresh pyjamas, having to do this tomorrow while hungover is going to be hell so your sober-self better be grateful to drunk you because this is far too much effort when you’d rather be curled up in bed crying over a stupid boy.
✰ ✰ ✰
Banging sounds in the kitchen jolt you awake, your head pounding from the hangover you’re currently sporting. The clanging not helping your current state at all, your eyes squint against the minimal light seeping into the room. The furrow set in your brow not helping the pain in your head, you must look incredibly angry right now… and remembering yesterday… yeah, you are incredibly angry right now.
Groaning you flop onto your side and notice that Johnny must’ve come in earlier because there’s some ibuprofen and water sitting on the nightstand next to the bed. You hate how thoughtful he’s being after saying some pretty thoughtless things, he’s not being fair to you at all. Just to get your ducks in a row, he implied you wanted to sleep with your friends, devalued your feelings for him, gave you the silent treatment, got upset that you left the house, wouldn’t talk to you last night, and then again disregarded you all while knowing he had hurt your feelings… yeah, you’re pissed.
Talking right now, or today, might be a bad idea, you’re not in the best headspace, whatever reason he has may not be enough for you. Ignoring the ache in your bones and head, you get up and pack away your bags, stuffing everything in haphazardly, staying here… might not be best for either of you. Being in a home with someone who is upset at you but not willing to speak about it… makes you uncomfortable, you were already worried about overstaying your welcome when things were good… now it feels almost unbearable.
You are thankful to drunk you for getting clean last night, it’ll make leaving easier, you change out of your pyjamas and crack open the door to scope out the area, double checking he’s not in the way. He doesn’t seem to be in the main areas, you think you may be able to leave without him noticing. Grabbing your bag, you quietly shuffle to the front door, it feels ridiculous, like you’re attempting to pull off some great heist, it’s not lost on you how stupid you’re being but you’re hurt, mad, and hungover, you get to be a little stupid.
“What are you doing?” Johnny’s voice makes you jump in place, you hadn’t even heard him approach you.
Slowly, you spin to face him, “…Nothing?”
His eyes look you over before focusing on the bag you’re holding, “Really? Because it looks like you’re trying to leave without saying goodbye.”
“Well, I just thought… after yesterday… it may be better if I leave… quietly,” your head is too sore to be standing here talking about this right now.
He frowns at you, his hands on his hips, annoyed by your choice, “Better for who? I don’t want you to leave and I never said that I did.”
“You haven’t said anything actually,” you point out, you don’t even know why he cares if you stay, he’s the one who started the ‘argument’ or whatever this is.
He sidesteps your statement, instead asking, “Where are you gonna go?”
You roll your head and look away, “Back to mine… probably.”
“While your ex is out there… actively stalking you?” His tone is dubious.
He’s annoying you with his logic, “I don’t know, Johnny, all I know is that you’re not talking to me and I don’t feel welcome here.” You’re starting to tear up and you curse yourself for it, “I was already hesitant to stay here and now you don’t look at me and when you do, you look so… angry and I don’t know why. I don’t know what I’ve done to upset you so much.”
He’s quiet and it seems like he’s not going to say anything… again. You sigh and turn to the front door, choosing to leave anyways but Johnny grabs your wrist, stopping you, “Don’t leave… please.”
You close your eyes for a moment, the light hurting your head, You turn back to him, waiting for him to continue talking; he lets go of your wrist when he’s certain you’re not going to walk away.
He adds, “I’m not upset at you–”
“–It feels like you are.” You interrupt.
He’s beginning to get exasperated, “I’m angry with myself, I’m pissed off and I took it out on you, and I’m annoyed that I did, I want to talk to you about this, I want to explain.”
“Explain then! I’ve given you chances to explain and all you do is stand there silently, I want to be able to forgive you,” you sigh at him again, “You’ve fucked up, if you were anyone else… I would’ve walked away already but I want you to give me the chance to forgive you.”
“I got pissed when I saw you with that– with Michael, it wasn’t rational but it made me realise… people your age are interested in you, there are people out there that are better for you… I– I had already known that… I just didn’t expect…” He’s getting pissed again, you can tell by the way he crosses his arms and his mouth pulls down into a scowl, “I didn’t expect the anger I would feel at seeing you with someone else, I didn’t… the idea of you being with someone else, of someone else touching you how I have, it makes me physically sick.”
You take a deep breath, “So… because you got jealous… you implied I wanted to sleep with my friends and ignored me when I told you I liked you?”
He looks like he wants to touch you, his fingers thrumming against his bicep, fidgeting, “I wasn’t thinking properly, I’m so sorry, doll.”
Your shoulders drop, your bag slipping, “I don’t know… how to react to this–”
He cuts you off to add, “–I like you too, a lot.”
His words make your heart skip a beat but you hold steady, “You can’t say that and expect me to just forgive you.”
He moves closer to you, “I know, that’s not why I said it.”
“I’m not forgiving you.”
“That’s okay,” he hums, “Can I touch you?”
This man does not play fair, “I–”
He touches you anyways, his hand holds the side of your face before he pulls you to him, hugging you tightly, “I am really sorry… I don’t feel good enough for you, you deserve better, you deserve more but I can’t help but feel incredibly selfish because the idea of someone else having you… it literally drives me crazy, doll.”
Being held by him, regretfully, has you feeling so much better, your bag properly drops from your shoulder, and you hug him back, missing his warmth. “You were mean.”
“I’m sorry,” he replies.
“I’d had such a bad day and all I wanted was to tell you about it,” your eyes start welling with tears.
He repeats, “I’m sorry.”
“I missed you,” you sniffle out.
His head leans down to you, nosing at your cheek, “I missed you, too.” You move to pull back, but his hands hold you still, one of them grasping your face, his lips brush against yours before he pulls back himself to say, “You know, I was also seriously concerned for your safety, I came home and you still weren’t back and I had no messages from you, nothing letting me know you were okay.”
You suppose, you can apologise for that much, “And for that, I am sorry.”
“I forgive you… this time.” He jokes, taking it lightly.
You look at him carefully, considering everything, “Johnny, I need to know what we’re doing.”
He’s confused by your sudden question, “What do you mean?”
“I mean, are we more than friends?” You need clarity, after having none for so long, you just need to know what the hell you’re doing.
His brows furrow and he pretends to think really hard, “Considering I’ve made you cum multiple times and stuck my tongue in your mouth… I’d consider you more than a friend.”
You groan and roll your eyes at him, pushing him back by his shoulder, it barely moves him, his hands instead grabbing your face and pulling you to him. He takes your lips in his own, his kiss full and passionate, it takes you by surprise and you make a small sound reminiscent of a whine.
He presses his forehead to yours, “Do you wanna be my girl?”
“Ugh, corny,” you complain but you hate how badly you want that.
He chuckles lightly, pressing kisses to your lips again, “I want you to be.”
You’re not fully paying attention, temporarily distracted by his kisses, “Mmm... Sorry, what?”
He simplifies, “Mine, I want you to be mine.”
You agree easily, “Okay.”
A smile spreads across his lips and then he moves to press kisses all over your face, “Does this mean I’m forgiven?”
“Somewhat,” you answer cryptically, mostly because you’re annoyed by how easily he fixed everything.
“I’ll take it,” he breathes out a laugh.
You wince involuntarily, your head still pounding, your body reminding you of your adventures last night and the consequences that come along with them, “I need to lay back down.”
Johnny’s tone is worried, his hands hold onto your shoulders, putting some distance between you both to look you over, “Are you okay?”
You deadpan back, “Yeah… you’re just exhausting.”
“Not nice,” he complains.
You smile cheekily at him, “I’m kidding… mostly,” he forces a smile back at you and you laugh lightly, “I’m hungover… I just wanna lay back down and die."
"Bit dramatic don’t you think?” He asks.
You glare at him, “Says you.”
He raises his hands in a placating manner, “Completely correct, let’s get you back in bed hmm?”
The rest of your day is spent recuperating in bed, you’re in and out of sleep, sometimes only ever up long enough to eat or drink something. Johnny brings you… way too many snacks but he insisted on you eating, it was nice and also so much for your pounding head, you ended up asking him to leave you alone to rot for the day, which he reluctantly did. You think he’s still concerned you’ve not forgiven him and if you’re telling yourself the truth, while you really want to forgive him, it’s not that easy and your heart sits heavy, the ache he caused not forgotten.
You’re going to try really hard to move forward though because you can understand, while he didn’t go about it well… at all, he’s struggling with his feelings for you and you can understand that much. It also wouldn’t have helped that tension would’ve been high for him, with you out later than expected, no messages, only to find you and see you with a stranger, while your ex lurks in the background… hmmm, maybe Johnny held it together better than you’re giving him credit for.
✰ ✰ ✰
It’s late in the evening when you wake up properly, your heart racing as you sit up suddenly, you can’t quite remember what your dream was of but you remember it was not pleasant. Anxiety crawls up your spine and you think it may have had something to do with your ex, the unease that sits in the pit of your stomach reminds you of the way you felt while at work. You hug yourself, rocking back and forth for a moment, trying to calm down… it’s not helping.
Crawling out of bed, you head the few doors down to get to Johnny’s room, wanting to seek comfort from him. You knock lightly, trying to see if he’s awake, it’s late though so you doubt he’d still be up. You consider entering his room and waking him up anyways but you aren’t sure he’s been sleeping well lately so you turn around and head for the lounge room instead.  
You grab the remote off the coffee table before flopping onto the couch, laying on your side, completely stretched out, you aren’t going to be able to sleep anymore so you might as well find something to watch and get comfortable. There isn’t much on at this time of night though, nothing good anyways.
Somehow, you find yourself heavily invested in the channel that only sells things, all advertisements for stuff that nobody feasibly needs or would use more than once but for some reason, you are completely involved in what the man is waffling on about. Why yes, you definitely do need a little bear named ‘Tiddy Bear’ for your seatbelt so it’s less annoying… you don’t own a car.
You’ve somehow become so absorbed in the crap commercials that you jump slightly when Johnny leans over you from behind the couch, “Holy– Don’t do that,” you gasp.
His voice is deep with sleep, “Sorry sweetness… but what the fuck are you watching?”
You state simply, “Tiddy bear,” and then point at the television.
Johnny sleepily looks where you’re pointing, squinting against the bright light, “…Right,” you can practically see the thought enter his head as soon as he thinks it, “You know… I could always be you–”
You groan at him, “–Shuddup!”
He laughs as he looks down at you, “You don’t even know what I was gonna say!”
“I’m fairly certain I did,” you raise a brow at him.
He wears a lazy smile as he rounds the couch, he taps your legs and you tuck them up so he can sit beside you. Once he’s seated, he pulls your legs into his lap so you’re stretched out again. His hands absentmindedly massage your calves, he watches the advertisement with you for a bit, a new one playing, something called the wearable towel, it looks like a dress… but towel material.
Johnny frowns at the infomercial, confused, “Seriously, doll, what the fuck are we watching?”
“Well, I couldn’t sleep, so I was watching some tv and somehow got really into the infomercials,” you shrug.
He puts all his attention on you, “Why couldn’t you sleep?”
You shrug again, “It was nothing, just a bad dream.”
You don’t look at him, still watching the lady talk about how annoying traditional towels are, Johnny squeezes your calf so you look at him, “Could’ve woken me up, if you wanted to talk about it.”
You hum at him, “I didn’t want to disturb you, I did knock… on your door, to see if you were awake.”
“Hell, sugar, next time just crawl into bed next to me, I really wouldn’t mind,” he smiles at you and then asks, “What was it about?” He keeps massaging your calves, fingers digging into the muscle, it’s nice.
“I don’t remember… but it was… scary,” you feel embarrassed to admit that, you’re a grown adult, it seems silly to be frightened by a dream.
He considers you for a moment, not really sure on what to say, “Yeah, sometimes it’s like that.”
“I just felt dumb, having a bad dream, it feels childish,” you sigh, frustrated with yourself.
“The feeling was real though, it’s not childish, I’ve had nightmares before.” He rests his head back on the couch, “You’ve had the most stressful time lately… I’m honestly surprised you’ve not had more nightmares.”
You watch him, he’s looking up at the ceiling, “I was scared,” you admit.
“That’s normal–”
“–No, not tonight, I mean at work, when he came in and stayed my whole shift,” Johnny looks to you, his attention focused solely on what you’re about to say, “I was scared but I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of effecting me… so I ignored him and I thought about coming back to you, I thought of how,” you take a breath and look away from him, “I thought of how safe you make me feel.”
He sounds emotional, “I make you feel safe?”
You look back to him, feeling bashful, “Johnny, you feel more like home to me than any place ever has…” You’re nervous, feeling open and vulnerable, but you add, “Yes, you feel safe, you feel like home.”
It feels like he looks at you for too long, his eyes looking over you, full of so many emotions that you can’t read. When he does speak, all he says is, “Move over.”
“What?”
“Move over, I’m getting in beside you,” he starts shuffling to lay down next to you on the couch.
You laugh, “Johnny, there is not enough room.”
“Yeah there is, lemme in,” he continues to lay down.
You roll your eyes but shuffle back as much as you can on the couch, your body close to slipping off the furniture entirely. He lays down on his side next to you, his arm coming around you, tugging you close and supporting you so you don’t fall off.  
You look up at him, “Why are we doing this?”
He huffs at you, “I wanted to cuddle with you.”
He looks sleepy right now, it’s endearing, “Why so suddenly though?”
“You said something cute and it made me happy,” he presses his face into the crook of your neck, his breath against you makes your skin prick, “I’m glad I make you feel safe… and I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you, having him at your place of work… I should’ve been there.”
“I don’t blame you for that, I didn’t tell you,” you reach up and comb your fingers through his hair, “I– I wanted to call you but I worry so much… I worry about how much I burden you.”
He presses a soft kiss to your neck, it sends a shiver down your spine; he pulls back to look at you properly, his arm holding you as close as he can, “You aren’t a burden to me,” he holds intense eye contact with you, trying to show you how serious he is with one look.
“I just don’t want to worry you with silly things,” you tuck your head into his chest.
He vibrates with a hum, “Well, for starters, being scared of your freaky ex who is stalking you… is decidedly not silly, secondly, I’d much rather you tell me about the silly things, I want you to tell me everything that worries you, I want to help… can’t do that if you don’t confide in me, sweetness.”
“I’ll talk to you more… but you have to promise to do the same, you keep so many things to yourself and I want to support you, however I can,” you mumble into his shirt.
His tone is light as he agrees, “Deal, now can I make out with you, or is this an inappropriate time to ask?”
You scoff at him but pull back and press a gentle kiss to his lips, he groans as you move back too soon, “All you get,” you snicker.
“Not kind at all,” He complains.
You give him another quick kiss, “Funny though.”
“So funny,” he repeats humourlessly, scowl on his face.
You laugh at him and his hand moves up your body to the back of your head, his mouth crashing onto yours, the sudden contact takes you by surprise. You sigh against him and he licks into your mouth, his kiss deep. Your leg moves to hook around his waist, pulling your lower half closer to his, he groans into the kiss, his hand moves from the back of your head, down your front and under your shirt. He gropes at your chest, fingers pinching your nipple, rolling it between his thumb and forefinger.
He moves his head down to your chest, pulling your shirt up and enveloping your nipple in the warmth of his mouth. His tongue flicks at you and you push towards him, soft sighs slip past your lips, your mind hazy. He bites at you lightly, his forehead resting against your sternum, he presses his face between your tits and sucks a hickey into the skin between them, his hand back to pawing at you.
He sighs against you, and then your world is spinning, he’s sitting up and taking you with him, you end up straddling him. His hands trail your body, tugging your shirt up and off your head, you lift your arms to help him. He leans forward and begins to leave more hickeys on you, marking your chest completely, your fingers thread through his hair, pleasured sighs leaving you.
He mumbles into your skin, “Take your pants off.”
You pull him back by his hair, “Excuse me?”
“Please?” He smiles at you. You look at him sceptically but he only continues to smile at you, “I’ll make it worth your while, promise.”
You concede and hop off his lap, pulling your pants off, you go to sit back on him but he tuts at you, “What?” You ask.
“Panties. Off.” His eyes are looking directly at your underwear, waiting for them to be gone.
You sway side to side, feeling timid but you comply and slip the garment down your legs, Johnny smiles brightly as you do as he asked. He makes grabby hands at you and you move closer to him, he grabs you and positions you over one of his thighs.
You’re a little confused, “What are you doi–”
“–Want you to ride my thigh, doll,” his hands encourage you to straddle his thigh properly.
“Johnny… that’s embarrassing,” you pout at him slightly.
“What happened to my eager little thing hmmm?” He grips your hips and starts dragging you back and forth on the material of his pants, “Promise it’ll feel good.”
You twitch on him slightly, it feels depraved to rut into his thigh while he watches but you start grinding down onto him lightly, your movements still uncertain. Johnny’s hands help facilitate your movements, wanting to see you do it yourself but also wanting control of the situation. Your cunt begins leaking onto him, the material of his sleep pants darkening under you, shudders run down your back and muffled whimpers get caught in your throat.
Your hands reach up to his shoulders, holding onto him to ground yourself, your fingers digging into his skin. His eyes watch how your pussy grinds into his thigh, smile still present on his face, absorbed in how you’re getting his leg all slick, the grey of his sweats now a dark grey. The friction the material of his pants give you is driving you insane, your need clawing up your spine, Johnny can tell you’re getting needier, based on how your eyes get glassy and your hips rut down into him more freely.
“There ya fuckin go, thas a good girl,” he comments.
His hands push you into his thigh firmer, the sudden change has you moaning out to him. You fall forward and tuck into his neck, your whimpers are breathed against him and he grunts at how wet you’re making his pants, at the little noises you’re making against him. You’re doing a lot of the work yourself at the moment, in the back of your mind you’re embarrassed at how you hump down onto him, at how damp you’re getting everything but Johnny seems so fucking pleased about it all.
You twitch into him and moan at the friction on your clit, the sound spurs him on, his hands grip your hips tightly and he moves you back and forth on his thigh quickly, your slick making the slide obscenely easy. Johnny’s own eyes are glassy, dizzy from how much you’re leaking on him, he moves one hand to pull your head back to look at him, he’s in awe of the fucked out look on your face.
“Mmm you always make the prettiest faces for me,” he compliments before taking your lips in his.
The kiss is messy, his lips demanding and desperate, his tongue in your mouth searching, consuming. He swallows down all the sounds you make for him, his own sounds shared in the kiss, when you part for a moment, strings of your saliva connect your mouths together. The evidence of how depraved in manner he kisses you sets you on fire, a whimper pulled from your chest. He smiles lazily at you, his thumb rubs over your lips, spreading your shared spit over them.
He pushes his thumb into your mouth and you take it, sucking on it gently, his eyes look wild as he watches you, “Need you to cum on my thigh, sugar.”
Your eyebrows pull up at him, your cunt clenching on nothing, your fingers dig into him as you continue to rock back and forth on him. Your stomach tensing, he pulls his thumb from your mouth and runs it down your chin, sternum, torso, all the way down to your clit, his thumb rubs circles into you, it makes you twitch against him. Johnny closes his eyes and seemingly remembers his goal very suddenly because he grabs you tightly again and starts forcefully dragging you back and forth, his leg bouncing, adding to the stimulation.
You gasp out to him, “Hah– Johnny~”
“Jus take it like this, cum like this, want it all over my leg, doll, want it stained into my fuckin pants.” His eyes are honed in on your cunt again, involved in how you’re dripping on him, how easy you slide on him.
Your voice pitches higher, “Johnny– I– mmph–”
He encourages you, already knowing, “Go on, soak my thigh, sweetness.”
You gasp and shudder against him, your hips desperately grinding down into him, your high so close. Johnny’s intense, greedy gaze on you is what undoes you, you twitch on him as you cum, pathetic whimpers sound from you as you rut down into his leg, he supports you as you finish, helping you ride out your high, feeding you praises about how well you did and how cute you look.
Once you’ve come down though, he keeps moving you into him, enjoying the way your body jolts in sensitivity at the action. You slump forward into him, small whines leaving your lips as he overstimulates you. He turns his face into your neck and lightly bites you, your cunt clamps down onto nothing, the pain shoots straight to your drenched pussy, a sad little moan slipping from you.
Johnny’s hands rub up and down your back, soothing you, “How you think you’re ever gonna be able to take my dick when you get fucked out this easily is beyond me.”
“I could take it,” you argue.
You can feel his smile against your skin, “I’m not so sure.” He pulls your face back so he can see you properly, “Yeah… I’ve missed that.”
You’re kind of hazy, mind making static noise, “Missed what?”
His smile turns devilish, “That cute little fucked out look you get on your face when I make you cum, a sight for sore eyes, doll.” You don’t get to say anything back, he picks you up and carries you with him back to his room, “Bet you’ll sleep fuckin fantastic now.”
You giggle against him because yeah, this might’ve done the trick.
✰ ✰ ✰
When you wake in the morning, you’re alone in Johnny’s bed, you lay still for a few more moments, enjoying the warmth of his large bed. You assume he’s gone to work; he’s probably messaged you but your phone is in the guest room and you don’t really feel like moving right now. You feel warm and safe wrapped up in his sheets, sleeping next to him was the best you had slept in weeks and you think he’s going to have to put up with you being in his bed more often now.
Eventually, after a few more moments of tossing around in his bed, you get up and wander down the hall to grab your phone. You were right, he had texted you saying where he was, he had to head in early and didn’t want to wake you. He should be back at a normal time though so you’re happy for that, it gets lonely in his big apartment.
You also have a message from your manager, telling you that you’ve got a few more days off… which is, surprising to say the least. Michael might have had something to do with that, which is kind but you need to figure out a long-term plan, on if you want to stay or go. Ideally, your ex would leave you alone, or the cops would arrest him for trashing your apartment but seeing as how they’re not all that useful, you don’t really know what to do.
At least now you have a few more days to consider your options, you were not looking forward to your afternoon shift. You’ll have to thank Michael next time you’re on with him, you don’t know what he said but you’re trusting that he didn’t divulge anything too personal, you didn’t even want to tell him about your ex, it was just unavoidable.
The day is uneventful for the most part, you clean the kitchen and guest room, you also make Johnny’s bed, you’re still a guest, it’s only polite that you clean up after yourself. There isn’t much else for you to do though, so you’re back on the couch, scrolling your socials and watching something inane as background noise. It shouldn’t be too much longer until Johnny gets back, you’re hoping anyways, you’re bored and want to talk to him regarding what you should do about your ex.
Speaking of… a text from that awful little man comes through, you forgot you hadn’t blocked him, you click on the notification and read it. Obviously, it’s all senseless anger, mostly name calling, not at all pleasant to read but after having him trash your home, this is not as scary as it would’ve been a while ago. You consider blocking him but then you think, this may help you actually.
He continues blowing up your phone on and off all afternoon, you end up silencing his messages so you can use your phone without being yelled at through the screen. It shouldn’t be but some of the messages are hilariously laughable, the fact you were with him for a whole year and he was like this? It’s almost inconceivable to you, how could you miss so much of his problem behaviour and why has he gotten so stuck on you.
One of his messages in particular sticks with you, ‘I deserved better.’ It makes you scoff, what a jackass. The rest aren’t as funny, they’re threatening and abusive and if you spent all your time reading them it would probably induce a panic attack.
Brushing it off, you put your phone down and involve yourself in the show you had put on hours ago, whatever his problem is, is not your fault and you shouldn’t bend over backwards trying to understand the motivations of someone so clearly mentally unstable. It’s not your fault, it’s something you have to repeat to yourself, so you don’t forget… because it’s not your fault and you won’t let him make you think that it is.
The front door rattles as Johnny unlocks it and walks into the apartment, you call out to him, “Welcome back!”
His shoes clack against the floors as he walks to where you are, “Hey, doll,” he pats the top of your head from behind the couch.
You bend your neck to look back at him, “How was your day?”
“…Annoying but thankfully shorter than some others,” he smiles at you, “How was your day?”
“Good, uneventful for the most part… well except…” You trail off as you watch him.
He steps over the back of the couch, it’s quite the show how his footing wobbles a bit on the plush cushions, you give him a quizzical look as he sits beside you, “What? Couldn’t be bothered to walk round.”
Laughing and shaking your head, you say, “You would’ve expended more effort climbing the couch than walking around it.”
He brushes you off, “Yeah whatever, just tell me about your day, what were you gonna say?”
Were you going to say something, “Hmm?”
“Uneventful day, except…?” He prompts.
You begin, “Ah, yeah, my ex started blowing up my phone, harassing me today–”
Johnny’s face twists into a disgusted scowl, “–You’ve not blocked him?”
You squint at him, silently admonishing him for interrupting you before you could finish, “Well, I had honestly forgotten to, he hadn’t even reached out until now but I think it may be helpful, in getting a restraining order on him, that way I can go to work and if he shows up the cops will actually have to do something about it.”
He considers your words for a moment, “Hmm, not a bad idea, want my help with that?”
“Please,” you smile sweetly at him.
He pinches your cheek and tugs lightly, “Of course, though…” he lets go of your cheek and you rub at it, “…I would prefer he were dead.”
You can’t help but laugh at the abruptness of his statement, “Right, well… I guess you’ll just have to settle for this.”
“Whatever makes life easier for you, doll,” he opens his arms for you to hug into his side, which you do.
He wraps his arms around you and holds you tight, you sigh against him, “I really just want him to leave me alone, so I can forget about him and move on, I don’t want to confront him, I don’t want to fight him, I just want to be left alone.”
“I understand that, we’ll make it happen,” he kisses the top of your head and you believe him.
You cuddle on the couch for a bit, enjoying his comfort but then your phone rings, checking the screen you see it’s a friend from college, “I should take this,” you tell Johnny.
He nods at you easily and lets you get up.
Taking your phone, you walk off to the guest room to get some privacy, “Hey! It’s been a while, what’s up?”
Her voice is chirpy through the phone, “It has been and nothing much, I just wanted to see if you were free to come round mine tomorrow? I need help with an assignment for that one class… with that one professor…”
You can practically feel how her eyes glaze over, you’ve already taken the class and catch on immediately, “Yeah I’m more than happy to help, I’m not sure how much help I’ll be… I’m still surprised I passed.”
She laughs from the other end, “But you did and at this rate, I’m closer to running away and living by the seaside on an isolated island than I am to passing this course.”
“Well then, I can be around tomorrow? Like, maybe midday? Can’t have you moving away, you’re like the only college friend I have… that I like.”
“Sounds good and I feel exactly the same about you,” you both share another giggle but she trails off, “…Have you been okay?”
You’re a bit confused by her sudden question, “Yeah I’ve been all good, why?”
She seems hesitant, like she’s not sure how to word what she wants to say, “Well… I’ve been hearing some… things… about you and it’s got me a little confused.”
You frown, “What kind of things?”
She sighs, “People in our circle have been saying you were cheating on your ex and that you’re broken up?”
“I mean we are broken up… but I did not cheat on him, I ended things with him for different reasons but if anyone cheated in that relationship, it was definitely him,” your fingers pinch the bridge of your nose, you have a feeling you already know who’s spreading the rumours.
“Yeah, I didn’t believe it but it’s really odd… that people are saying that, I always thought he was a little… freaky, so I got worried hearing about the rumours.”
You huff quietly, mostly to yourself, “Thanks for asking though… and not just assuming,”
“I like to think I know you well enough to discern what rumours are and aren’t true,” she lightly chuckles and it makes you smile.
Scratching the back of your neck, you ask, “A lot has happened but I can tell you about it all tomorrow?”
“I’d like that, you know I’m always here for you right?”
“I know,” you smile lopsidedly, you think you may need to get better at confiding in others.
You both share your goodbyes and hang up, you’re glad she reached out to you, honestly, if she wasn’t campus living and you didn’t have Johnny, you probably would have stayed with her, she’s one of the closest friends you have. It’ll be nice, telling a friend about everything.
Distantly you wonder how long the rumours have been running around and if this may be why you got ditched by those girls at the party and still haven’t heard from them, even after messaging them asking if they were okay.
This is such a frustrating position to be in but you think, if anyone believes the rumours without even asking you about them then they aren’t people you really want to be friends with anyways, doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt though.  The only thing you’re really worried about is if Johnny is included in the rumours, you don’t want to ruin his career, or hurt his image, at the moment the rumour doesn’t seem to mention him but you don’t know how long it will stay like that.
You waddle through the apartment and stand in front of Johnny, “There are rumours about me circling,” you pout.
“What?” He’s confused and you don’t blame him.
You slump onto the couch, your shoulder bumping into his, “Saying I cheated on my ex and that’s why we are broken up.”
He grunts, “What a load of bullshit,” his arm comes around you, pulling you close, “Are you okay?”
Sighing, you say, “Yeah, I mean, if people believe it that’s not my fault, I’m just so exhausted, it feels like it’s one awful thing after another at the moment.”
He turns to you and kisses the side of your head, “Would you feel better if I fucked you?”
Your voice feels small, “Yes.”
“That’s too bad,” he smiles against you.
You pout at him, “Don’t kick me when I’m down.”
He chuckles, “How about I cook you dinner instead?”
You smile at him, “That would be nice too, I guess.”
“Could you help?” He’s worried about it not being edible.
You let out an airy laugh, “Sure.”
✰ ✰ ✰
When you had told Johnny you were going out today to see a friend, he couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed, he has today off and he was hoping to spend it with you. He wasn’t about to stop you though, you need to see your friends, he’s glad to see you’re willing to talk to someone else about this. Sometimes, he worries that if he hadn’t heard your ex over the phone that first time, you wouldn’t have told him anything and that’s a scary thought to him.
He's left in the apartment alone and he’s bored, you’ve not even been gone long and he feels like a dog waiting for its owner to come home. Maybe he should feel a little pathetic about it but he’s pretty happy about where is, he’s scared… about the future but he’s also looking forward to his relationship with you. All he has to do is keep himself busy until you get back and he’s golden.
Some of your clothes are piled in his room, ever since he took you to bed with him a couple nights ago, you’ve been sleeping in here with him instead. Not that he minds, in fact, he’s got the opposite of complaints, the fact that you’re staying close to him and confiding in him, it makes him ridiculously happy.
The bag filled with your clothes sits on the floor in the corner, you’ve been here for a while now and you still won’t unpack, that bothers him. He won’t unpack for you, that’s invasive and will also probably upset you but he will pick up the clothes you left on the floor this morning, he’s just going to take them down the hall so they can get cleaned with his but as he picks them up, your panties slip from the pile.
He feels so ridiculously ashamed of how incredibly quickly his dick chubs up at seeing just your underwear, they’re cute… and now he’s thinking of you in them and nothing but. He rolls his shoulders and looks up to the ceiling, trying to ignore the growing ache in his cock but now all he can think about is you and how wet and needy you get for him.
Shamefully, he drops everything onto the ground and picks up your panties, his mind running wild. He feels like a fucking creep how he shoves them into his face and inhales deeply, his mouth salivating, he wishes you were home, he wants to fuck you with his tongue, it feels heavy in his mouth as his need grows.
His other hand slides down his body and undoes his belt before unbuttoning his slacks, he shoves his hand into his pants and groans as he grabs himself over his underwear. Your scent overwhelms his senses and he can’t hold off, he tugs his boxers and pants down, only enough so his cock is free, he’s desperate now, his dick twitching in need.
If he weren’t so stupefied by his thoughts of you, he’d probably recognise this as the creepy behaviour it is but right now he doesn’t care, he didn’t get to cum the other night after making you finish on his thigh and he’s been hesitant to try anything since but he’s so wound up it’s insane. After you had fallen asleep next to him that night, he’d pitifully moaned when he squeezed the base of his cock, just to get some kind of relief.
He's honestly not sure how long he’ll be able to hold off on fucking you, he wants it to be special for you, he wants it to be memorable, he doesn’t want to be just some guy you give your virginity to and regret… but in saying that… the need that claws at his insides every time he makes your pretty, cunt cum for him, is getting harder to control.
His hand not holding your panties grips onto the dresser for balance, his other hand reaches down to his cock, his tip leaks precum into your underwear, they’re soft as he moves them with his fist up and down his shaft. He sighs pathetically at the feeling of jerking off into your panties, his mind reeling with what it would be like to taste you, he wants to cum inside you and then lick you clean. His head falls back and he groans at the thought, his muscles twitch as he thinks of how pathetically you’d whine for him, your complacency with all the filthy things he does to you always makes his head spin.
With the amount he’s leaking into your panties, the glide is easy and his hand speeds up, a gasped grunt escaping him. He’s already on the edge of cumming just from thinking about tongue fucking you, he talks big game about you not being able to take him but he’s concerned that as soon as he sinks balls deep in you, he’s going to cum.
His chin falls to his chest and he watches how he fucks into your panties, his eyes are glazed over and his hand moves faster, he needs to cum, he knows it won’t satisfy him, not how he wants but if he doesn’t see your underwear coated in his cum, he thinks he may die. He thinks of you watching him cum into your panties, how embarrassed and turned on you’d be, it drives him wild and his cock jerks as he shoots his load into the fabric of your underwear. He groans deeply, his hips spasming, thrusting forward to ride out the euphoria.
He sighs, temporarily satisfied but his thoughts are still plagued by complete filth, he wants to make your pussy a complete mess for him. He wipes up his cum with your panties and tugs his pants back up, he’s going to need to calm down, he can wait for you to get home.
✰ ✰ ✰
The uber back to Johnny’s is boring, you’d had a good time with your friend though, you both pulled your hair out over the assignment and over your ex… but it was good, talking to someone. She was supportive and kind and she’s offered to sneak you into campus living with her if you need, which made you giggle. You told her about your plans to hopefully get a restraining order though, so you think you should be fine to go home soon.
It turns out, those girls… the ones you were at the party with, they’re apparently helping feed the flames of the rumour going around about you. At least you weren’t all that close to them, they just gave you a reason to go out and get drunk for a night. Whatever, you don’t want to put any more energy into all this, you’re going to go back to Johnny’s, you’re going to hang out with him and you’re going to trust that the court will let you get a restraining order against your ex.
When you get back to Johnny’s, it’s eerily quiet, you were expecting him to be watching a movie or listening to music… anything but it’s silent in the apartment and it’s freaking you out a little bit. Walking further into the main living area, you place your bag down and continue to wander around, looking for him.
You call out for him, “Johnny?”
He stumbles out of his room pretty quickly at the sound of your voice, “You’re back! How was it? Did you have fun?”
You squint at him a bit, his mannerisms odd, “…Yeah, it was good, I’ve missed her so it was nice… catching up.”
He fidgets in front of you a bit, like he’s antsy, like this is all a formality and he doesn’t really care, “That’s good! I’m glad you met up with her, I’ve been worried about you a bit lately…” His eyes roam over you, his fingers tapping against his skin.
“…Johnny?” He hums at you in reply and you ask, “Are you okay? You seem… on edge.”
His eyes flick back to yours, “Yeah, doll, I’m groovy, easy going,” he gives you a big cartoonish smile, it’s a little strained.
Frowning, you walk closer to examine him and he intakes a small, sharp breath, “Are you sure? Because you’re really twitchy right now.”
“Did anything else happen? Do you want to talk?” He’s clearly changing the subject.
You decide to let him, “No? I’m fine, we talked, I helped her with her assignment, nothing special,” you shrug at him.
“Okay, good,” is all he says in response. Just as you’re about to ask him what he means by that, his hands are on you, pulling you close, his mouth hovering right over yours, “I missed you, sweetness… bad.”
Your voice shakes slightly, the proximity getting to you, making your skin all hot, “I’ve not been gone lo– mmph–”
He cuts you off, his lips on yours are demanding, his kiss searing, like he’s been waiting his whole life to kiss you like this. You reach up and grab a hold of his shirt, hands fisting the fabric, trying to ground yourself. His hands are on you… everywhere, they grope and pull at the skin of your hips, at the fabric of your shirt, even palming your breasts, his touch is heated and needy, it’s making you dizzy. A small, whimpered moan leaves you involuntarily and he takes the chance to lick into your mouth, deepening the kiss.
With how he’s kissing you and how he’s touching you, your faculties are eluding you, your mind foggy. You’re the one to pull back first, needing air. Resting your forehead against his chest, you catch your breath and attempt to think straight again. Which is, surprisingly difficult, your eyes feel wet, everything about you feels malleable right now, he could probably say the stupidest thing on Earth and you’d still be weak in the knees with hearts in your eyes.
You lightly giggle against him, “Feeling needy?”
He grunts at you, “Doll, you got no fuckin clue.”
You think you may have some clue, “Bold statement coming from the man who still won’t fuck me even after I have asked so nicely, so many times.”
He rolls his eyes at you, only a little bit amused, you’re waiting for his smartass reply when he suddenly picks you up and throws you over his shoulder, walking back to his room with you.
“Wow, talk about desperate,” you joke.
“Keep talking, sweetness, enjoy the upper hand while you can still talk coherently,” he drops you onto his mattress, his form standing over you from the foot of the bed.
You know he’s right, and yet, the need to challenge him like he doesn’t render you speechless from a kiss hits you anyways, “Cocky, much?”
“Could say the same thing to you, at least mine isn’t false confidence,” he winks at you and begins unbuttoning his shirt.
You lean on your elbows and watch him intently, his skin slowly being revealed to you, he’s being a tease on purpose. Summoning your courage, you tug your pants down your legs and toss them off the bed, not stopping, you tug your shirt off completely too, your bra following not long after. Johnny stops what he’s doing, his shirt fully undone but still on.
Smiling up at him, you ask, “Something wrong, sugar?”
He rolls his head back, a sigh coming from him, “Feeling mean today?” He asks, shrugging his shirt off his shoulders.
“Only a little bit,” you’re honestly a little bit shocked with yourself, you feel nervous and exposed.
He climbs onto the mattress and you shuffle back as he moves up, his form large over yours, he leans down and places a hot kiss on your lips, “Gonna stick my tongue in your pretty pussy, babe.”
Somehow, the crudeness of his words always shock you, “Okay.”
His smile at your reply is wolfish, giving you one last kiss before he’s moving back down the bed and pushing his face into your panties. You squeak and jump at the feeling, he only hums against you, seemingly pleased at your reaction.
“Wanted to put my mouth on you all day,” he mumbles against your core.
You can only gasp in reply, his mouth opening and latching onto your cunt over your underwear, his tongue wetting the fabric, his nose rubbing into your clit. His hands hold you open and you fall flat onto the bed, not able to hold yourself up. When he detaches it’s only to pull your panties down your legs and off, his eyes are wild and he stumbles over his movements in his rush.
He's right back in between your legs as soon as he can be, his mouth not wasting anytime in how he immediately licks at you, fucking his tongue into your hole. A hand reaches down and threads through his hair, you give it a light tug and he moans against you. Your back arches for him, hips moving against his face slightly, your body moving on its own accord.
Johnny’s own hips covertly rut into the bed below, his senses overtaken by you, how you smell and taste, it’s making him dizzy, he’s been looking forward to this all day. He’s practically drooling into your cunt, his skin on fire, how you writhe and twitch on the mattress isn’t helping. Knowing he’s making you a needy, whimpering mess is making his cock ache even worse than it did this morning.
You’re gasping and whining for him and he moans into your pussy, his hips humping into the mattress in a more obvious manner as his desperation grows. His hands push on the back of your thighs, lifting your legs up and giving himself more access to your gooey cunt. He’s eating you like he might die if he doesn’t, like you’re his only salvation and you’re already so close to cumming for him because of it.
The grip you have on his hair tightens and he borderline whimpers into you, his movements not ceasing, if anything they pick up, his tongue moving quicker. Your stomach twitches and pulls, your orgasm fast approaching, Johnny can tell, he knows by how slick you get, how pitched your whines get.
You want to tell him, “Johnny, mmm–”
He grunts into your cunt, already aware and actively trying to have you finishing on his tongue, he wants it all. He wants you to cum directly into his mouth, he wants to drink it all down and then he wants to shove his tongue in your mouth and make you suck on it, tasting yourself through him. His cock twitches in his pants, his mind moving a million miles a minute, shamefully, he’s close to cumming in his pants.
Suddenly, he shakes his head against you, his nose moving over your clit, the stimulation shocks your orgasm from you, stumbled syllables vaguely reminiscent of Johnny’s name tumble from your lips, sounds that he relishes in, his hips stutter against the mattress as your cum floods his senses. The way your pussy spasms and creams on his tongue undoing him completely, his cum no doubt staining the front of his slacks, shivers running down his spine.
The orgasm he gives you and how taken by surprise you were, renders you wordless and thoughtless, only the sounds of the blood pumping in your ears can be heard, everything else is like white noise. You huff and shake slightly, the buzz in your veins delicious, he was right, about rendering you completely speechless, you knew he would be.
He licks at your pussy a bit longer, until you’re jerking away from him, too sensitive, you close your legs, knees touching, giving yourself some reprieve. Johnny pulls up and off the bed, once he’s standing, he yanks his pants off. You don’t miss the way his slacks and boxers are damp with his cum, he’s made a complete mess of himself.
You feel shy, “You came from that?” You’re completely shocked that he’s managed to finish just from humping the mattress and tongue fucking you.
“Got such a pretty little pussy, I’d cum from watching you play with yourself,” he plays it off easily, not an ounce of shame in his bones at the moment, only a large grin plastered on his face.
The embarrassment his words cause you is immense; your face feels warm and you can’t tell if it’s from your orgasm or what he’s just said. He crawls back on the bed, his cock already hardening again, apparently… he’s not done. His cock is shiny and slick from his own cum, his tip red and already leaking again, it’s making your head spin.
Your voice feels small, you feel small, “Are you gonna fuck me?”
“No.” His answer is dead on, no room for argument, as per usual when it comes to this topic.
“Then what–”
“–Gonna play with you how I like,” he strokes his cock as he looks down at you, “Open your legs, sugar.” You pout slightly, and he rolls his eyes at you, “Come on, sweetness, I’ll make you feel oh so good. Promise.”
You scowl at him lightly but open your legs for him, one of his hands moves to hold you open further. “You said you would fuck me,” you complain.
“I said maybe,” he counters.
He doesn’t wait for you to continue arguing with him, already moving his tip through your folds, he skates against your wet pussy and it has him shivering. He leans down over you, the length of his fat cock resting against your cunt, he holds himself up over you by his forearms. His hips begin slowly grinding down into you, everything is so slick and wet, your skin slipping against each other. He plants a kiss on your lips, his tongue entering your mouth straight away, wanting you to taste yourself. You moan into him, soft sighs also leaving you.
When he pulls back, you try again, “I want you, please.”
He groans, his hips stuttering, “You have me right now.”
“Want you inside me,” you nearly sob.
“Fuck– Not today,” his voice is hoarse.
“Always– mmph– always feel so empty,” your eyes are wet and glassy as you look at him, not so silently pleading, “Ngh– Wan you to fill me, please, Johnny.”
“Fucking– no, hnng– why– god– why do you want your first time to be now? Of all times?” He huffs against your skin, his cock painfully erect, throbbing and leaky for you.
“Don’t care mmph– don’t care when or where, just who,” a tear slips down your cheek, your need practically tearing you apart at the seams.
Johnny nearly whimpers, his cock jerking against you, his tip sliding over your clit makes your skin itch, the desire to be fucked full of him overwhelming you. It’s cruel, it feels heinously cruel how deprived of him you are, is it so much to ask to be so full of him you’re sobbing? You don’t think so, your breath stutters as he continues rocking back and forth between your folds.
“I care when and how,” he bites back, nearly snarling at you.
You share your frustration with him, loose lipped in your pleasure and need, “I jus wan –­ngh– you to fuck me blind, I can’t, I need it– mmph– Johnny please!”
He actually does whimper this time, “Fuck– doll, you can’t– don’t do this to me,” he’s in such a weak state today, his desperation for you driving him insane.
The way you’re begging for him to stuff you full of his dick, is going to kill him, he already wants so badly to feel your tight, wet cunt wrapped around him but he wants to do it right. Your begging is chipping away at his resolve, his mind filling with images of how he’d stretch you out on his cock, how your eyes would roll back in your head as he fucks you just right.
His cock is making an absolute mess of you both, your lower halves completely coated in slick and cum, his head ducks down to look between the two of you. The underside of his cock glazed with your cum nearly sends him into a frenzy, he moans at the sight, forehead falling to rest on your sternum.
You hook your legs up on either side of his hips and he chokes at the change, his thrusts speeding up, one of his hands reaches down and digs into the fat of your thigh, nail biting into the skin. You gasp and whine, your mind slipping from you, you want to beg him more, you want to plead with him to have mercy but you’re not sure you can find the words anymore.
You sob over and over, begging him, “Please, please, please, please–”
He looks back at you, eyes sharp, “You’ll take what I fuckin give you or I’ll never touch you again,” he cautions, his tone harsh.
“Johnny~” you whimper, eyes large and dazed.
He tuts at you, his tone mocking, “Poor thing, not being satisfied sexually?”
You could almost cry, his words feel so mean.
He glares at you, “Know what I did while you were gone, sugar?”
You shake your head at him, a gasp leaving you as his cock head catches on your clit.
“Got me so fuckin– so needy,” he ridicules your usage of the word from earlier, “that I got hard at the sight of your panties on my bedroom floor.”
A strained and small noise leaves you, not at all expecting him to admit to something like that. His hand holds onto the side of your face and tilts you up to look at him, he’s looking down his nose at you and it really shouldn’t arouse you as much as it does. His hips don’t stop, never stopping, he couldn’t, not even to punish you, it’d be hell for him too. He needs this, it’s as close as he’s going to get to fucking you and he’d have to be put in the fucking ground before he’d remove himself from you, he needs you to cum on his cock like this.
“Wanna know what I did with them?” He asks suddenly.
You’re distant but not gone and you nod in response, curious.
He smiles evilly and leans down to whisper into your ear, “I fucked them, tugged on my cock until I came in them. Only thinking about your cunt and how fucking divine you taste, how badly I wanted to stick my tongue in you,” He licks the shell of your ear, “I think– ngh– that you’re getting off easy.”
“Johnny,” you whine at him, the only thing he’s succeeded in doing is making your hornier for him.
“One day. One day I will fuck you open on my cock but today and right now, you’re gonna fuckin behave and cum like this,” it’s a promise, one he intends to keep.
A shiver runs down your spine at how low and authoritative his tone is, a pathetic moan leaving you, one that Johnny doesn’t miss, not if his smile is anything to go by. He doubles his efforts into sliding his cock through your folds, his hips moving quicker, more weight put behind them, it makes you whine and wriggle under him. The hand he had on your face moves back to your hip and grips you tight, forcing you to stay still for him.
He's moving desperately, wanting so badly for you to cum like this, he wants to fuck his whole cock into you but is too damn stubborn to do it now, he doesn’t want your first time to be like this. His abs clench and twitch, his own end fast approaching him, his head leans down to your neck and remembers the other night, he pays extra attention to how close you’re getting, pressing soft kisses to your neck as he continues thrusting against you.
Your pussy is throbbing for him, you’re so unbelievable close and it has you seeing stars, Johnny can tell you’re right on the edge and just as you’re about to cum, he bites into the junction between your neck and shoulder, harder than the other night. Your cunt jumps at the shock of pain and you moan pitifully loud, tears that had been sitting in your water line slip down your cheeks as you spasm and cum for Johnny. He groans at the sounds you’re making for him, at the way your cunt gushes with your orgasm, making an absolute mess of yourself and his dick.
He holds off to let you ride out your high and then he’s pulling back onto his knees, jerking his cock while watching the way your pussy clenches on nothing, he whimpers and wishes he was fucking you full. In just this moment, he wishes he were a worse man but he settles for this, he fists his cock, and just as he’s about to cum he notches his tip at your entrance, not pushing in at all, just resting it there, his cum entering you as much as it can from this position.
You wriggle your hips at him, pushing down slightly, his hand immediately shoots out to push you down, knowing you’d absolutely attempt to take him all, even if it hurt. He can’t help how aroused that thought alone makes him, you’re willing to hurt yourself to take him all and it tugs at something ugly and primal inside him.
After he’s dumped his load on and partially in you, he pulls back, watching the way his cum has coated you. His finger moves to collect it and he begins pushing it inside you, his finger stretching you open as he stuffs you full of his cum.
The grip you have on him is making him lose his mind, “God, you’re so fucking tight.” He groans.
You can’t offer much else but blabbered words, nothing you say very coherent, not for lack of trying though.
Johnny only chuckles, amused by how stupid you are right now, he’s not able to control himself and he begins opening you up on both of his fingers, fucking you with them. His cum making it easy, his only aim was to fuck it into you but now he wants you cumming again, the sounds you make when you cum, they’re something he hopes he never forgets. He’s playing with you, his fingers leaving to spread his cum around some more before re-entering and pulling you apart by the very fibre of your being.
You’re whimpering at him, trying to tell him you’re sensitive, that it’s too much, that you’re going to cry but he either doesn’t understand or doesn’t care and based by how pleased he looks when you begin sobbing for him, you’d safely assume it’s the latter.
He smiles brilliantly at you, “You’re such a pretty doll.”
It’s too much, “I can’t– ngh–”
“–Hmmm? What was that?” He’s taunting you; he knows what you were going to say.
 Your eyes roll to the back of your head, another orgasm already fast approaching you, sadly you think it’s significantly spurned on by how cruel he’s being to you. Your body shakes, your legs try to close but he holds them open easily, his eyes intently watching how you take his fingers.
“Sucking me right back in, got such a needy pussy, I swear,” his fingers move quicker, stroking into one spot that has you gasping out a shocked moan, “Making such a fuckin mess, sweetness, can you hear how fuckin messy you are, hmm?”
You can, the obscene noises of your shamefully wet cunt fill the room and you still find it in yourself to be embarrassed, even when reduced to a sobbing, whimpering, state. Your arm moves to cover your face and Johnny tuts at you, disapproving of the action.
He directs you, “Wanna see your pretty face, doll, keep looking right. at. me.”
Forcing yourself, you look at him, your eyes barely able to stay open, everything you see is blurry anyways. Johnny moves his thumb to circle your clit, you’re sensitive and it makes you jump, your instinct to move away, not that you get very far. He is insistent, his hand never slowing and his thumb never moving, the added stimulation has your stomach doing somersaults.
Your cunt clenches down on his fingers and Johnny groans at you, “Atta girl, there you fuckin go,” his voice is soft, encouraging.
Your orgasm wracks over your body, mind hazy and nowhere within reach, everything you moan out isn’t even close to sounding like words, the only coherent thing being Johnny’s name. Your back arches and he pins you back down again, his fingers and thumb still moving, aiding in your orgasm. It’s becoming too much but you can’t even move away from him, only able to take the overstimulation until he’s satisfied. Everything is… dark and you can’t hear a damn thing.
He does eventually show you mercy, removing his fingers from your pussy, he taps your clit a few times just to watch how you jump and spasm at the contact though, and then he really does pull back. His eyes stay on your cunt though, watching you for a moment before his gaze wanders all over your body, taking in how blissed and fucked out you look.
Wistfully, he murmurs, “I’m gonna shove my cock so deep inside you, you’ll feel me in your stomach.”
“Johnny–”
“–Not now but one day,” he laughs airily, leaning down to kiss you tenderly on the lips.
He gets off the bed and pulls on some pants, leaving to grab a cloth and water, you lay on his mattress completely gone, not a single thought in your head. When he comes back, he cleans you up and makes you drink the water.
“You make me drink a lot of water,” you mumble around the rim of the glass.
He’s watching you, completely charmed by you even though you’re a naked mess drinking water in his bed, “Need you to stay hydrated, don’t want you passing out on me.”
“Keep making me cum like that and I just might,” you pass him the almost empty glass and he places it on the nightstand. He hands you one of his t-shirts and you put it on, appreciating the cover. 
“So… you’re into biting, huh?” He’s teasing you, his grin large.
You pout at him, “Don’t be mean… panty thief.”
“Oh, how you wound me, sugar,” his hands dramatically clasp at his chest over his heart. You roll your eyes at him and he instead asks, “Wanna watch a movie?”
“I am not moving,” you say, stretching your achy muscles out.
He offers, “What if I carry you?”
“…I could be amicable to that.”
“Yeah, I fuckin bet,” he chuckles but carries you to the lounge anyways.
The movie you end up watching is one of his, which should be a shock to no one, it’s not like you’re entirely conscious of the plot though, you’re still off in the clouds. Something Johnny admonishes you for, “Pay attention!”
You argue back, “I’m tired, plus I’ve seen this one before!”
“You’re lucky you’re cute,” he jokes.
“I could say the same to you,” you sigh, snuggling into his side, he wraps his arm around you and holds you close.
This is the most peaceful you have felt in a while, you feel safe and cared for and you think, you could stay like this forever.
✰ ✰ ✰
Thank you for reading it all !!!!! I know it was quite a lot to get through >v< Let me know your thoughts/feelings and reach out if you have questions !!! ily and have a beautiful day/night <33
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sapphicmsmarvel · 4 months ago
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feysand: overstimulated
Rhys and Feyre use their daemati powers to help their partners head go quiet.
under the cut bc overstimulation and anxiety can be triggering to folks.
Sometimes thoughts are too loud. Kind of like you’re thinking in a yelling volume. Everything is loud and makes you want to pass out. You were overstimulated. It felt like your skin needed to be peeled off.
You went home from work early because you just could not handle it all anymore. You felt like you were about to have a panic attack simply from the onslaught of stimulus.
Luckily, the fresh air on the walk home helped you ground yourself. But you still felt like your blood cells had electricity zapping through them.
You had just gotten home when Feyre greeted you,
“Hello, my love.” She put down the vase of flowers she was holding and kissed you on the cheek.
“Hi.” You said quietly, wincing.
“What’s wrong?” She immediately looked at you as if you were about to drop dead.
And like a signal was sent out, Rhysand immediately came into the room as well. Feyre walked behind you and began rubbing your shoulder.
“My head hurts. I’m overstimulated. Everything is too loud. Even if nothing is loud outside of my head it’s all loud inside.”
“Let me see.” Rhys cupped your head. His hands cupped your cheeks so his pointer fingers rested behind your ears and his thumbs sat on your cheekbones.
“Can I use my powers to see if I can silence it?” Rhys asked you softly. So his voice didn’t make your head hurt.
“I trust you.” Was all you needed to say.
Feyre moved to rubbing your hips and pressed a kiss to your shoulder.
Then everything went quiet. You let out a sigh, head falling back and eyes closed. Your head fell back against Feyre’s own. She pressed a kiss to your cheek. “Better?” She whispered. Her voice caresses you like a feather.
“Orgasmic.” You said so earnestingly. Your face now void of any tension. Pure relaxation and relief.
It made Rhys’ heart soar. Knowing these scary powers can make you feel good. Knowing you just put so much trust in him. Opening your mind to let someone who everyone in Prythian is terrified of.
His hands shook on your face from the sheer emotion.
Then your eyes popped open, “is this draining you?” Your eyes were wide with concern. For his well being over your own.
“No,” he shook his head. Tears threatening to go onto his waterline. “No, my love. Everything is fine.”
You smiled softly. “Can I go to bed?”
“You don’t have to ask.” He lightly laughed. It was still daytime. A little bit before dinner. But you always were a night owl and enjoyed eating dinner later in the night.
So you three decided to take a late-day nap. Did he need to keep a point of contact on you up the stairs to keep his powers working? No. But he did. He just really did not want to be away from you physically.
Feyre smiled all knowingly as he guided you up the stairs. The staircase was wide enough that you two could walk side by side and he got to keep his hand on your face.
You climbed into bed. You had thrown your pants off and stolen Rhys’ t shirt from the night before. You climbed into bed and Feyre was at your back while Rhys was at your front.
Slowly, you began to fall asleep. Now that you didn’t feel any tension in your head and you were able to fully relax. All the tension was gone in your body as you drifted.
Rhys couldn’t take his eyes off your sleeping face.
“I love you so much.” He whispered and kissed your forehead. Then leaned over you to kiss Feyre.
“And I love you so much.”
“We love you too, Rhys.” She whispered, her lips brushing his.
“You two are too good to me.”
“Shush. Go to sleep love, we will be here when you wake.” She whispered.
So he did eventually drift off. He stayed awake long enough for Feyre to fall into her own dreamland.
He didn’t care if he had to stretch his arms to wrap the both of you in them. He would cast a spell to make his arms longer just to hold you two.
It’s crazy, how his whole world fits into his arms.
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miniwheat77 · 5 months ago
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Silence. (Ghost x Reader.)
!nsfw, smut, p in v sex, unprotected sex, trauma, panic attacks, blood, death, MDNI!
Short lil ghost fic, hope you enjoy. 💖 (not edited)
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If there's anything that's more scary than a warzone.
Anything more terrifying than running through a battlefield, bullets flying past you, explosions around you.
A war is terrifying. But there is one thing even more chilling than that.
Silence.
It's all they hear on your end of the radio. Silence.
Just minutes ago you were responding, you were alive and well and talking to them. Now, nothing. It takes them all off guard. They're worried about you immediately, needing to get to your last coordinates. So they rush there.
They can see your trail. Blood and bodies lay in the wrath that was once you, ambushing and killing to get to the reason behind this mission in the first place. One that they hadn't clued you in on in the first place. Now, as they approach you, they realize they should've. They should’ve asked more questions because it might’ve saved you from what’s to come. You've stumbled upon a lab, standing where you are. You're grief stricken and there's nothing anyone can do to stop it now. Thousands of photos line the walls. Test subjects, something that you had once been involved in. You're sick the moment you see it. The photos, the blood. The wounds and the innocent people dying when there's nothing you could do.
"What the fuck is this?" The venom is clear in your tone as you spin to look at your Captain, who had failed to tell you what this mission was in the first place.
You turn back toward it. "I'm sorry Y/N. I had no idea. It was Laswell who set it up." He stresses at the way you look at the photos on the wall. You seethe, staying quiet. Turning back and making your way to the wall. You tug a photo off, tack falling to the ground. You see the innocent girl inside the photo and you recognize who she is. Having seen her killed the same day you had escaped, your empty promises to her. How you'd get her out and she'd get to see her family again and how you watched a bullet pierce through her skull. Her lifeless body falling, blood spattering onto you. It was then when Captain Price had arrived to help you.
It's what made you decide to join the task force after everything. After being kidnapped and tortured by a foreign enemy. How nobody seen or heard from you for months, how they knew not to send you on anymore missions involving this operation knowing that you were one of few surviving members. It would set you off and that's why you stayed away from it. John was going to let Laswell have it when he got you back to base.
It takes little to nothing to send you into a fit of rage. You start ripping everything off of the walls, throwing equipment, kicking, and destroying everything physically around you. You needed to.
They let you until you're hyperventilating.
It takes Ghost to pull you back, nobody else was brave enough to intervene and he holds you to his chest as you flail and pant, blinded by the memories of being held captive and being tortured. Watching all of those innocent people die around you, some of which were your own. You didn't take enough time to heal and that was apparent to Captain Price as he watches you freak out, having bottled everything up. Watching it explode as you fell into a full blown panic attack. He shakes his head, seething as he exits the building. Phoning Laswell the moment he could no longer hear your cries.
"John."
"So help me god Laswell. If you knew what this was and you let me bring her in here.." He hesitates.
"What do you mean?"
"This is a direct connection to the operation Y/N was in before this task force, Laswell. She's hysterical." He hisses. Laswell can tell through the phone that he's beyond pissed.
"I didn't John, I had intel from some other sources. I didn't know." She hesitates. "Well. Double check next time." He stops responding after that.
When John returns, Simon is still holding you, but he's turned you away from everything that you had just destroyed. Your eyes are bloodshot and you have tear stains on your cheeks. You stare ahead like there's nothing going on behind your eyes and it's unnerving.
Silence.
Nothing but silence and they hate silence. Ghost holds you tight. Like if he lets go you'll disappear into thin air and John silently thanks him for it. Ghost of all should know how you feel right now. Having lost everything himself. When he feels you're ready, he moves you from the room. Helping you up but keeping your head turned away from everything. You didn't need to see this anymore.
When you arrive back on base, you’re silent. Making a b-line right for your room and they don’t see you for the rest of the night. You sit in there for the most part. Your reaction today probably scared everyone and you wish you hadn’t reacted the way you did. But you couldn’t control yourself.
Something shocked you today.
Ghost. The way he held you. You knew he was one who was never into physical touch or affection but that’s all he’d done. He held you to his chest, whispering nothing but soothing things into your ear to calm you. And the fucked up part about it was how well it had worked.
For the next couple of weeks, the aura around Ghost is different. Your eye contact is prolonged in passing, and whatever you feel. You know that he can feel it too. When you pass by him, it’s like everything moves in slow motion and he holds your eye contact until the last possible second. His gaze is chilling.
It’s you who seeks him out first. Late at night, you come knocking and you don’t know why. You don’t remember your feet carrying you to his door this late at night but it’s almost like he’s waiting for you. Still fully dressed despite the hour. You raise your hand and hesitate before you knock very quietly. He says nothing as he opens it up and sees you. Eyes just piercing yours. He steps to the side, allowing you in. Not a word spoken between the both of you. You stand in the middle of his room, turned toward him as he closes the door. You can see his gloved fingertips twist the lock. Swallowing hard, your eyes trail back up to his eyes.
You’re the first one to break the silence.
“You feel it too… don’t you?” You’re already breathless and it comes out more pathetic than you think it does.
He says nothing. Which is the answer you think you want. Ghost is guarded, of course he wouldn’t admit to it. But he’d also deny you if it weren’t true.
He’s on you before you even have time to react. His mask is pulled off and his lips are on yours, pure Ghost. Nothing but a killing machine who you’d hardly talked to before all of this. He’s got you pressed against the wall. He helps you remove your sweatpants, tugging them down your legs.
A hiss leaves your lips as he raises you up. He holds you against the wall, pressing his knee up against it to reach for his belt and zipper. Tugging his jeans just past his cock to free it. You can feel his bare skin brush against yours. Not a single fabric blocking him from you now.
His shaft presses against your entrance and he has time to think about if he should do this or not.
He stares you in the eyes, they’re watery and puffy. Your lips are blushing and plump from kissing him.
“Please-“ you mewl. “Y/N.” He warns. Finally coming to, enough to realize what he’s doing. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to take advantage of you.” He hisses.
“Simon.” Your voice is low.
“Fuck me until it hurts-“ you hiccup. Looking up at him.
His breath hitches in his throat. He rests his cock right up against your entrance and watches your face for any discomfort for at least a minute.
When he sees nothing but pure lust in your gaze, he thrusts up into you. Penetrating you. He cuts your cry off with his hand but hears just a second of it. It rattles him to his core, the way you sound. Ghost doesn’t know what this is, what his sudden feelings for you are. And it’s so weird that you felt everything too. Something has changed, drastically. He holds your hips tight to the wall as he hammers his hips into yours, your own hands clamp over your mouth. He’s rough, but in the most pleasurable way. Even with his tight grip on your hips, fingertips sure to leave bruises. You still don’t hurt.
You move your hands from your mouth, biting your lip to silence yourself as you wrap your arms around his neck to kiss him again. It’s sloppy and messy, just like the sex you’re having but you couldn’t care less.
He moves you to his bed. It creaks a little bit but Ghost can’t find it in himself to care at this moment in time. Your thighs shake as he ravages you. He keeps a bruising pace, not letting up or relenting in any way. He needs you to feel every part of him. He needs to be overbearing, almost to the brink of too much but not crossing it.
You clutch the sheets hard, he tugs his shirt off finally. Taking a deep breath. His hair is damp from sweat, beads of it settle on his face. Drips slide down the strands of his hair. Falling to land on your chest, his hair was a little overgrown for his liking but he hadn’t gotten the chance to cut it just yet. The wetness is what brings you down to earth to raise his chin, making him look you in the eyes. That pressure is building and there’s no going back now. You hold his eye contact, hearing his breathing start to get more jagged and out of control. He was right there, and so were you.
You cum first, eyes screwing shut and he clamps a hand over your mouth, hips still moving into yours as he chases after his own high. When he cums, he can’t hold back the groan. Eyes rolling back as he fills you. Shaking as he experiences the most intense orgasm he’s ever had by far, barely being able to ride it out from being so sensitive. He flinches as you throb around him, it’s almost too much. “F-fuck” he hisses, collapsing on top of you. Resting his head on your chest. “Shit..” he mumbles.
“I’m sorry.” He breathes. His hair is wet and it’s cold all of a sudden.
“For what?” He raises his head to look at you. “I.. I shouldn’t have pushed you like this. And I shouldn’t have..” he hesitates. “I should’ve pulled out.”
“It’s okay. I’ll take care of it, don’t worry about it.” You take in a deep breath. “You didn’t push me. I came to you.” You breathe. “I’m glad you did. Stay.” He mumbles. Seeing the edge of your lips turn up in a smile. “Okay.”
You end up staying there until morning when you sneak off to your own room. Nobody knows what happened, and you want it to stay that way for now.
You’re not sure what this is. What these new feelings for him are. Of course they’re intimidating. But you don’t let them scare you. It’s the start of something new, and bonding with someone who understands your trauma and knows how to help you.
You can help each other.
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majesty-madness · 6 months ago
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Within the Cover of Night - Arthur Morgan x reader (sfw)
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Summary: At first, she thinks it’s nothing but her imagination; that because of the life she lives, she’s letting her paranoia get the better of her. And then she’s snatched up in the dead of night by a pair of unfamiliar hands. 
Word Count: 3600+
Warnings: established relationship between Arthur and Y/N, horror themes, kidnapping, stalking, violence, blood, injury, cursing, pissed off Arthur, crying, attempted rape, mentions of sexual assault, panic attack, attempted murder, serial killer, hostage situation, brief escape, comfort 
a/n: Not proofread. Hardly anything happens in this part, the next part will be much more intense.
Main Masterlist
HOUR TWO
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HOUR ONE
For a while now, she had been meaning to ride out into Strawberry but the camp has been a little too hectic as of late with the whole moving again thing. 
They had just gotten settled at Clemens Point, one of the more muggy spots but still beautiful nonetheless. 
With things quiet, Y/N felt she finally had an opportunity to venture a bit so that afternoon, she packed up her horse and headed right out. 
Thankfully it was a clear day out, not a cloud in sight coupled with a light breeze. These were the days she admired most, nothing crazy just a nice warm day and a cool wind blowing through her hair. 
It’s what made her love this country. 
Around twenty minutes passed, when Y/N could see the edge of Strawberry in the distance, maybe about a couple hundred yards, before a voice yelled out. 
“Help me, please!” 
Her head jerked to the side of the road, seeing a distressed man looking up at her and waving his arms about. “Oh please Miss, help me.”
“What’s the problem?” She immediately asked following his plea. 
He sighed drearily. “My horse got scared by a snake and threw me right off! I tried to catch myself but I hurt my leg in the tumble. If you could give me a ride back to town, I would be very grateful.”
Y/N outwardly cringed, not sure she was willing to do what he asked. “I don’t know, sir…”
“Please Miss! I’m staying in a small hotel just in Strawberry. It shouldn’t be that far from here…” He desperately explained, planting both hands together in what looked like prayer. 
Y/N looked back up toward the road, eyeing the distance it would take to travel into the town. Truthfully, it shouldn’t take any more than ten minutes on horseback. 
Loudly, she sighed and shook her head. “I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to take you back to town.” 
“Thank you so very much, miss. I really appreciate this!” The man gleefully exclaimed as he scrambled on the back of Y/N’s horse. 
Once the man had got on back, Y/N noticed her horse beginning to act fidgety, jerking her head back and forth while occasionally pawing at the ground. She had thought that was odd but Y/N continued with tugging on the reins and leading her down the dirt path. 
As soon as Y/N’s horse, Maple, began a steady sprint the man spoke. “I’m lucky you came by when you did, Miss or else I might’ve been stranded with a twisted leg.”
“I’m sure somebody would have come by eventually.” 
The man laughed out loud, almost too loudly. “Maybe, but regardless, I'm still glad you stopped. I do apologize though, I have a terrible sense of direction so who knows how long I might’ve been lost.” 
Already Y/N could see the front gate leading into Strawberry at the end of the road. “I guess you do; Strawberrys’ just down the road here.” 
The man’s grip on her shoulders tightened the slightest bit. “My ma always said to stick to the path cause I was always gettin’ confused. I’ll never learn, I suppose.”
Y/N said nothing, instead took note of his slowly tightening grip on her. It wasn’t becoming obvious per say, she happened to feel the difference in pressure. 
“Lay off a little there, sir.” Y/N thought to herself, keeping her eyes focused on the road forward.
If this man kept persisting in his hold on her, she may say something about it but as soon as the thought entered her mind he hadn’t made another move to tighten his grip. 
Perhaps he was scared of falling off the horse. 
“Those were good times though, riding down the trail with my ma. I’ll tell ya, she knew her sense of direction.” The man continued to babble on and on. 
“Is that right?” Y/N replied nonchalantly, pretending to be engaged in what he was saying. 
“Oh yes, Miss. She was the one that taught me everythin’ I know.” 
Then Y/N’s horse passed the gate to Strawberry, heading right to the center of town. The man kept talking, like he didn’t know how to stop. 
“It was always just ma and me; the thing I remember most about her was how pretty she was.” 
Y/N hummed, finally stopping next to the hotel only a few feet away. 
However, the man didn’t make an immediate attempt to hop off or make any kind of gesture that he was getting down. Suddenly he leaned forward, lips nearly touching the shell of Y/N’s ear and whispered to her.
“But I think you are the prettiest thing I ever did see.” 
The sound of his lowered voice sent chills up her spine, a cold sweat to form on her forehead. Every nerve in her body stopped functioning altogether and all she could do was sit there. 
Before she could push him off her, he quickly jumped down and waved her goodbye. “Farewell, Miss. I know we’ll be seein’ each other again.” 
When Y/N flicked her eyes up to meet the man’s, she no longer saw a helpless person with a piss poor sense of direction, now she saw a physically able man who knew exactly what he was doing. 
If that smirk on his face wasn’t any indication. 
Y/N felt a spell of fear wash over her as she watched him sturt away, leg working perfectly. 
Fighting back the disgust settling in her stomach, Y/N jerked the reins towards the town entrance. Her instinct to hurry and gallop right out of there, but another part of her mind reasoned that since she rode all the way out here, she should at least check out what she wanted.
She reasoned however, if things got wary then she had her gun with her. Nothing a well-aimed bullet couldn’t fix, specifically a possible pervert who didn’t know how to keep his hands to himself.
Y/N made sure to go a bit of an obscure way to the local shop, going around the back of the wooden buildings, keeping her horse close to the exits. 
Surprisingly, for a small town shop, it looked very extravagant inside in a rustic kind of way. The floor and walls were shiny with polish, lanterns lining the expansion of the building, colorful woven rugs covering parts of the floor, framed windows paired with lacy curtains and small aisles of different kinds of items neatly placed on every shelf. There was even a corner of the room where people could sit and enjoy the company of a fireplace. 
It was real nice. It almost made Y/N forget what had happened only minutes ago. 
As she browsed the kinds of products the store had, she caught sight of a luster shelled ink pen. 
She’d heard about these; the new kind of pens where you didn’t need to dip into ink, instead they had their own ink inside the pen itself. She wasn’t quite sure how they managed that but it intrigued her. 
Looking at the unique design on the outside of the writing utensil, her thoughts drifted to Arthur. 
Maybe he’d like something like that. 
So without contemplating it for too long, Y/N bought the pen and headed right out. 
As she approached the back exit of the building she suddenly remembered why she had entered from the back in the first place when the familiar rush of adrenaline coursed through her veins. Her hand had raised to grab the doorknob, but froze for a second while she thought on all the possibilities that could happen as soon as she stepped out. 
Y/N raised her other hand to the revolver in her holster as she poked her head outside. She looked to the left then the right to discover nothing there. Not even a stray animal. 
Once that reality sunk in, she relaxed her arms to her sides and headed back to her horse hitch a  few feet away. 
At first, things seemed fine on the way back to camp, however the longer she rode, the more unnerved she felt. 
Even as she came upon the trail that led to camp, there was something wrong. Her horse had been fussing about the entire ride back, making more noises than normal, fidgeting, acting anxious and that told Y/N things weren’t right. 
Her horse was not easily frightened, but whatever was happening was really bothering her; enough to make her move about like a scared child. 
Before she stepped fully onto the trail, Y/N forced the animal to a stop and turned her a bit. Her eyes stared into the treeline in which she could barely see five feet into. 
She hadn’t realized she’d done it, but Y/N had slowed her breathing down, hearing only the silence of the forest. 
Her gaze bounced around the patches of grass, bushes, tree branches, and such seeing nothing yet suspecting malevolence lurking in the approaching darkness. 
One second…two seconds…three seconds….four…five…
She began to sweat fiercely. 
Six…seven …eight…
The pounding of her heart reached her ears like thunder in the sky, rushing over her whole being.
Nine…
She wanted to look away, but didn’t want to at the same time; feeling if she looked anywhere else she’d be doomed. 
Ten.
Y/N tugged hard again on the reins and forced her horse to take off in a mad dash for camp, away from the deep forest. 
Though Y/N wasn’t the one running for her life, she panted out with a heavy breath nonetheless. The hypothetical chance of someone following her causing her fight or flight response to kick in. 
It was by no means logical as she had no way to prove that there had been anyone beyond the treeline as her subconscious seemed to believe, although the sensations that surfaced were no less scary. 
In those short seconds, her brain came to a conclusion and didn’t like what it saw. 
But what did she see? What did her sixth sense pick up on that she just couldn't understand? 
What. Was. Wrong?
As soon as her horse made it into the camp, she slid off the animal before she’d come to a full stop and stared off into the distance behind them both.
Her eyes trailed over the path she took, and waited for something to happen. But after all that, nothing did happen and as far as she knew nothing was going to happen. All she could hear were the voices of her fellow camp mates and the occasional animal calls. 
She blinked a few times before shaking her head and walking off towards the center of camp. Y/N hadn’t realized it but her brain sent her straight to Arthur’s tent where he sat on his cot, jotting down something in his journal. 
He immediately heard her steps making a b-line for him, and the moment he noticed it was Y/N he smiled but it quickly faded when he saw the expression on her face. “Darlin’?”
She wasted no time in plopping herself onto his lap and curling into his chest, face tucked to his neck. 
The sudden display of seeming affection nearly caused Arthur to drop his journal onto the ground, so he quickly tossed it to his cot. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?” 
She quickly wrapped her arms around his neck to pull herself even closer to him, making Arthur let out a slight grunt as she held onto him tightly. 
Instead of trying to further prod her into speaking, Arthur chose to settle his hands on the small of her back to keep her steady against him. And he continued to hold her for several minutes, feeling her muscles relax as time went on. 
“Did something happen?” He whispered between the two of them. 
Y/N took a deep breath before finally lifting her head to gaze up at him, eyes shining with tears. “Sort of.” 
“What do you mean?” 
She shrugged, finding it difficult to find the words because now that she knew she was safe with Arthur she felt a little silly for reacting like this. “I..was on my way to Strawberry earlier today, because I heard they had these new steel pens, and on my way there, this man came along shouting that he needed help.” 
Arthur began softly rubbing his thumb on a non-specific spot on her back as she spoke to quell the worries that plagued her. 
“Said he fell off his horse and hurt his leg, asked if I could give him a ride back to town. At first I wasn’t too keen on the idea but I felt guilty if I just left him stranded, so I let him hop on the back of Maple. I didn’t think much of it, but Maple started acting funny.” Y/N mentioned, lips pulling together in a frown. 
“How do ya mean, what’d she do?” Arthur asked in the silence between them as Y/N paused. 
Y/N let out a little huff, dipping herself further into him. “She was fussing about, making noises, pawing at the ground, stuff like that. Most things don’t bother her and since the man didn’t look all that threatening I thought maybe she was tired.” 
Arthur quietly nodded, waiting for her to continue with her story. “He kept going on about how he had no sense of direction and that his mother taught him everything he knew and for some reason, he mentioned how pretty she was. Said, it was what he remembered about her the most.”
“Then what?”
He could see the unease swimming in her eyes just by looking as she recounted what happened only a few hours ago. 
“Then he leaned in real close, and whispered into my ear: ‘I think you are the prettiest thing I ever did see.’” 
Immediately, Arthur’s stomach dropped while suppressing a cold shiver from crawling up his spine at the implication behind those words. 
Even though he hadn’t witnessed it, he couldn’t help the disgust rippling through him. Far too many times had he heard of the awful things done to women in saloons or back alleys where no one paid attention; far too many times he had seen the attempts men made at them when they thought there was no one around. The gunslinger in him would flourish with a rage at the idea of a man harassing some poor woman minding her own business, and promptly beat them within an inch of their lives for the simple fact that it was exactly what they deserved. And that was for women he didn’t know, now imagine what he’d do for the woman he loved, the woman he secretly promised his life to. 
God help any man who threatens her. 
“Did he do anythin’ else to you?”
Y/N quickly shook her head, leaning back into him again. “No, he just hopped off and walked away like nothin’ happened. And when he was walking away I noticed that his leg was working perfectly fine so he wasn’t even hurt to begin with.” 
Arthur let out a contemplative sigh, hands moving once more to create invisible in her skin. “I’m sorry, darling. There are some real bastards out there.” 
All Y/N did was nod, choosing then to sit quietly on Arthur’s lap, not uttering anymore words for a while. They spent several moments basking in each other’s presence as each ruminated on their thoughts. 
“Would it be alright if I sleep in your tent tonight?” Y/N asked promptly. 
Before Arthur said anything, she continued. “I know that it’s a bit sudden and we’ve never slept in a cot together but I really don’t want to be alone. And you make me feel safe.” 
His heart thumped with affection, giving her back a few pats and pressing a kiss to her hair. “I appreciate that, darling and of course, you can stay with me. I wouldn’t mind at all.”
“Thank you.” 
Arthur rocked her back and forth a few times when he spoke again. “Though, I can’t promise you’ll get a good night’s rest sleeping next to a big ol’ idiot like me.”
“Don’t you go saying nothing like that. It’s not true.”Y/N pouted, sticking her arm out to point him in the side where she knew he was sensitive and based on the way he tensed under her hand, she knew she got him good.
“Ah-alright, darling, I won’t go saying anything like that.” 
She poked him one more time causing him to reach down to quickly stop her, glancing down to see her bottom lip jutted out like a child’s. “You better not.”
With that, the rest of the evening carried on as normal with the exception of Y/N sleeping next to Arthur that night. Well, more like on top of him considering how small his cot truly was, but she didn’t mind in fact, Y/N liked that they got to be so close in such a vulnerable position. It was also thanks to the unexpected development that she managed to wake up the next morning with a calmness. 
And when Dutch had come to her once she was awake and walking around about a possible job, she didn’t feel the least bit worried. However when Arthur stated he was tagging along, she didn’t try to dispute it instead was thankful for his presence. 
On the ride to the nearest town, they chatted about this and that, the worry that plagued her long forgotten even as night fell and came the final decision for the night. 
“Are you sure, sweetheart?” 
Y/N nodded. “Yeah I’m sure, I’m feeling better today so I think I’ll be alright sleeping in my tent tonight.”
Arthur nodded silently to himself for a few seconds. “Alright then, but if you change your mind you’ll know where to find me.”
Promptly after, Arthur returned to his own tent for the night leaving Y/N to her’s. She stayed up for quite a while almost until the campfire outside had dwindled to small flickers of light and everyone else was asleep. This was a normal occurrence as she was a bit of a night owl but eventually she too became drowsy and without hesitation, laid out across her bed roll. 
Her eyes drifted to the ceiling of the canvas house, thinking on the events of the day where nothing particularly interesting happened and then, she fell asleep. 
________
A harsh pressure being pressed tightly against her neck is what woke her from her slumber. Her eyes quickly popped open, scrambling to fight off whatever was choking her in the dead of night. 
But the grip was too strong, no matter how hard she tried to peel away what she figured was someone’s arm, she couldn’t loosen the hold. 
Who was this person? What did they want? 
The darkness slowly started to creep in on her vision as she began to feel light headed and just before she passed out, she heard a familiar voice.
“You really are the prettiest thing.”
Off in the distance, Charles stood on night duty. These shifts were never entertaining but he supposed that was a good thing especially when you run with a gang of outlaws; himself included. 
Charles walked back up the path a bit, towards camp just to see if anything was amiss. He hadn’t noticed anything in the forest surrounding the camp, however when his eyes drifted over to the horses, it piqued his curiosity. 
Most of them seemed…antsy, like something spooked them. 
Already alarm bells were going off in his mind so he grabbed a lantern from the center of camp and began to walk along the numerous tents creating a semi circle around one firepit. He made his rounds first over to Lenny’s tent, seeing he was fine then to Abigail and Jack’s, then to Sean’s and up until he reached Y/N’s which sat between Sean and the other girl’s tent. 
He wasn’t sure what made him stop but his instincts screamed at him to take a closer look, something was off. 
Silently, Charles apologized to Y/N for the ill manners of barging in and pulled back the front flap of the tent only to see Y/N missing and the entire backside canvas cut completely in half. He stepped inside of the tent, hurrying out the back to discover drag marks and footprints that were far too big to be Y/N’s. 
Immediately he understood. 
Charles ran out of the tent out into the middle of camp, shouting for everyone to get up while making a b-line to Arthur. From the shouting, Arthur had already begun to stir. 
“Arthur, Y/N’s gone.” Charles stated matter of factly. 
The words went in one ear and out the other. Arthur, for a moment, thought he wasn’t even speaking english. “What?”
“Y/N’s gone, she’s not in her tent. Someone ripped open the back, and now she’s gone.” Charles explained with a sense of urgency. 
Now Arthur was awake, and as soon as the words settled in, he thought back to what Y/N had said the day before. 
“He kept going on about how he had no sense of direction and that his mother taught him everything he knew and for some reason, he mentioned how pretty she was.”
Arthur jumped up from his cot, running back to where Y/N’s tent lay now undisturbed, and nearly toppled the whole thing over when he pushed his way inside. 
“Then he leaned in real close, and whispered into my ear: ‘I think you are the prettiest thing I ever did see.’” 
He saw what Charles was talking about, not only was the entire back wall of the canvas material cut in half, the items inside the tent had been thrashed around as if someone had put up a fight along with tracks in the dirt leading outside into the trees. 
Y/N had been taken.
________
a/n: ran out of time so I had to break this into two parts, sorry ya'll! I'll try to be better about this in the future.
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