#this happens whenever i try to talk about things im passionate with people

[spookythesillyfella]

every time i want to try and infodump about hv unprompted i drop my phone and clasp my hands over my mouth / begin to squeeze my throat and make myself run out of air

[lovewithmary]

(not) moving on — a max verstappen x stark!oc x charles leclerc series

★ fc: madison beer ☆ summary: evangeline "evie" stark is in love with her best friend, max verstappen, but he tries his best to keep her at arm's length. but what happens when she starts to get close to his fellow drivers in the paddock? ★ note: idek why i like creating stark ocs, but it’s fun. This is purely for my own entertainment but I don't know if I'll continue it. It depends if people actually want to see more of this. (realistically, I might continue it because I want to see it lol) btw how do people do the subtitles?? like I'm so curious I want to do those

schat = darling in dutch

next series masterlist

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 20,492,182 others

eviestark: life lately 💜

comments

user1: MY WIFE IS IN A RELATIONSHIP???

user2: she’s actually living the life rn

user3: SCHAT??? ANG???

user4: the random tony stark jumpscare in the photo dump LMAOOOO

user5: who is the guy with tony stark in the 7th photo?? ↳ user6: i’m pretty sure that’s peter parker, an employee of stark industries??? he’s started out as an intern in high school but he’s rumored to be the COO once evie becomes CEO of stark industries

user7: WHO TOOK THE 2ND PICTURE

user8: not the single guys from the f1 grid in her likes 😭����

user9: THE WOMAN IN THE BACK IN THE 7TH PICTURE IM CRYING

user10: the first and second picture giving me 'boyfriend took these for me' vibes

user11: she looks so pretty and happy in the 4th picture <3

"You're playing with fire by posting our text messages, Ang," Max said, his voice shushed as he walked around the paddock.

"It's fine, Maxie. They'll probably connect me to a random famous person who is Dutch and then it'll blow over in a week," Evie dismissed.

"It doesn't really help that the guys are in your likes constantly," Max grumbled, and he heard Evie laugh.

"Some of them are pretty cute, and I think some even tried messaging me but I never saw them until it was late," she responded.

"Who?"

"Aww, Maxie, are you jealous?" Evie cooed, her tone sweet yet mocking at the same time.

"No... I just never expected them to be brave enough to message you," Max said.

"If you must know, I think it was Charles and Lando who tried. There are probably others, but I haven't seen them,"

"Did you respond to any of them?"

"Of course not, I'm loyal to you and only you,"

"Schat..."

"I know, I know, you wouldn't touch me with a ten-foot pole like that," Max could practically hear her rolling her eyes.

"You know we're just best friends, right?"

"And I'm saying I'm loyal to you and only you as a best friend."

"Are you doing anything soon?" Max was quick to change the subject, feeling as if he didn't, awkwardness would settle in and he hates it whenever Evie doesn't speak since he's fully aware that he loves hearing her talk considering how passionate she gets about things.

"Stark Industries' Gala is happening and Pepper's making me get a date for the event,"

"Why's she making you?"

"Something along the lines of I have to be seen with someone that isn't MJ, Peter, Ned, and Shuri," Evie sighed.

Max laughed at her situation, knowing that while Evie knew a lot of people, there were only a few that she could trust completely. And luckily for him, he was one of them. He was probably the first, considering they've known each other since she was 6 and he was 8.

"Good luck trying to find someone,"

"It's not even trying to find someone I'm struggling with. It's trying to find someone that's decent enough to spend my night with,"

"Who were you going to ask?"

"Well, I was going to ask you, but since we're best friends I don't think me bringing you as my date to the SI event would be something best friends do,"

"I'll go," Max said, shrugging.

"Wait, seriously? Like you going means you actually have to dress up,"

"I know,"

"The dress code is black tie. That means you can't wear your Redbull uniform like you're a walking billboard,"

"Do I really wear it that much? I saw people that were shocked when I wore a white t-shirt,"

"You're a millionaire who wears the same thing every day. So basically, every millionaire man,"

"I'm going to wear Redbull head to toe to the Gala now that you said that,"

[ladymirdan]

Warning, fandom rant.

I was gonna piggyback ride off Tagedezorns post about falling out of love with the fandom.

Dont get me wrong, I still fucking LOVE 40k.

Im having a great time painting my minis, reading the lore, reading and talking with the BL authors on twitter or talking the ears off the staff in my local GW (don't worry, they love it, and they have some fantastic HC’s too!)

But the rest of it is sadly losing its appeal for me as well, and it saddens me to see other fan artists or writers feeling the same, I thought it was just me.

When I first started to become active in the shipping fandom about a couple of years ago it was fantastic. I felt so welcome and wanted, I had never gotten a reception like that in any fandom before. I even faced my fear and started writing fanfiction, and people seemed to love it.

But the last months/year it feels like it's all gone. As if Tumblr has died, it feels like I'm shouting into the void. (I have a few people who still interact on my posts and I see you and I love you). But I have eightdoubled my followers last year, but that hasn't resulted in any more interaction, other than a few more likes. But to be fair, likes does nothing.

Im not an influencer or a content creator, and I have zero aspirations to become one. That is why I stopped doing tiktoks. I do not want to chase trends or algorithms, I want to be unhinged about my blorbos and see people being unhinged about their blorbos in turn.

I love the intense passion fandom can have, even when it's not a character I'm personally into.

I really don't want Tumblr to die. I have tried Discord and it was the most alienating and disheartening experience I've had since like high school.

When I first tried it out it was soo much fun, but as time went on, more and more people who seemed to like me stopped posting on there, and more and more whenever I posted I just got straight up ignored.

I could post in a channel that had been dead for weeks, and suddenly people started posting about other things, everyone ignoring what I wrote. If it happened once or twice I wouldn't have bothered, but a dozen or more times? It just fucking sucks. I noticed how it started affecting my mental health, trying to reach out and talk to people, but just being talked around and over. So I just stopped posting.

If someone doesn't like me on Tumblr I won't notice or get sad, but seeing it happen in real-time just fucking sucks.

And also, on Tumblr there is always the off chance that your post gets necromanced. That just doesn't happen on Discord.

And another thing that has happened a lot is I write a fic or a Tumblr post. It gets zero interaction, and I'm like “oh I guess no one is interested about that,” and then I see that someone has just reposted my fic/post in a discord and people are geeking out over it over there.

I'm not a paid artist/writer. I do what I do because I want to geek out over something, preferably with someone else. But I effectively become removed from my art. People are discussing it, just not with me.

Dealing with being unliked as a person fucking sucks. Especially when it's supposed to be your hobby-fun-time. And it is making me not want to post stuff anymore.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

So I've got a AU for you.

My idea is this there is a old man ghost bald head massive Ghost fire beard and it's got all these trinkets and stuff in it like a dwarf beard but this guy is like 9 ft tall and about 8 ft wide ( not really ). Anyway this ghost has been living near Amity park for a very long time he has a Time core any one of his abilities is visions. And whenever anyone has asked him why he's an Amity Park or more like a building in the woods all he will say is "I'm waiting for the king to arrive".

So being a ghost with a Time core has given him some advantages he can look into the past and learn things from one of his passions and obsessions is weapon forging or just plain creation he's a blacksmith he looks like a blacksmith he has a green leather apron and the funniest thing is people know he's there they just ignore him it's like a dirty secret the select few know and just won't talk about hell Danny actually meets him before the accident is parents had got word and decided that Danny should join them on the hunt the end result is Danny's parents being beaten unconscious and thrown out of the ghosts forge while Danny is left alone because he didn't attack the ghost the ghost has the courtesy to tell him that his parents will be fine just bruised bodies and egos. This gets Danny's respect and gives him a bit more courage so after a while Danny talks to him and after a while talking Danny drives his unconscious parents home.

But now there's this vendetta that his parents have but they don't just keep running at this ghost they know what's going to happen if they try anything their weapons will be destroyed and dismantled and they'll be beat unconscious at best broken bones if they really piss him off. Sorry for so often his parents come home after getting their ass kicked by this ghost and Danny is kind of concerned but also really amused and jazz just doesn't believe them. And this keeps going on until the portal accident.

You know I didn't mean to put so much there I just kept on thinking up stuff anyway you can edit how you like and head on from there hope you enjoy this idea. Also I used voice to text from my phone for this and I didn't really look over it sorry not sorry.

Sorry, I've been meaning to clean out my inbox but I always get distracted. This is more of an oc than an au but im loving it! Let Danny have a break :D

[tea-twords]

Title

ehehehe first fic im writing after what feels like a year or two or a billion. But im actually feeling it rn so im gonna give it a shot. AND PLS FORGIVE ME FOR BAD WRITING IM SO RUSTY RIGHT NOW IM TRYINT TO GET THR HANG OF IT

So a few headcanons I used for this fic before we get into it:

Whenever the Arataki gang is in jail for some stupid as ever thing, Shinobu gets a bit antsy after a while cause she’s the type of person to always need something to do. Not doing anything makes her a bit anxious

Heizou is very good at reading people’s emotions but that’s probably canon enough

Shinobu knows a way to make a functioning bracelet out of like 4 naku weed stems somehow

So um aha no idea how to format so I’ll try my best

And also a warning for some swear words, I also hc Shinobu swears at her ler while getting wrecked

Lee: Kuki Shinobu

Ler: Shikanoin Heizou

————————————————————————

God the day Heizou had today was surely a good one.

He returned to the police station after a day of substantial progress on his investigation into a new case to hear what sounded like a chorus of angels (and a few devils) breaking out in song.

Heizou’s immediate thought was “What in Celestia is going on”, as would anyone else think if they were in his current predicament.

He figured out pretty quickly that the culprits for this outcry of song were none other than the one and only Arataki Itto and his buddies, Mamoru, Genta, and Akira. Having been arrested for “disturbing the peace” (having a whole karaoke session right in front of komore tea house and actively inviting any passerby to join them), they decided to take their…passion, for karaoke to their prison cells and somehow managed to get some of the other inmates to sing along.

It was pretty hilarious, to say the least. It took almost all of Heizou’s willpower to not to burst out laughing as his fellow officers attempted to get the situation under control.

“I’ve got to tell Shinobu about this”

So now here he was, walking through hanamizaka, looking for the places Shinobu can commonly be found. Something was off though…

She’s not here.

“That’s troubling…” Heizou thought. “Where could she be, if not here? Definitely not any shrines, maybe at a shop? Or perhaps the by the sea!”

Heizou began to walk in the direction of the shore. It wasn’t the most logical place to look next, but something was telling him he’d get lucky there.

“Hey, Shinobu!”

He called out to the green haired girl sitting in front of the sea next to a maroon drawstring bag. She held her mask to her face, but lowered it once she saw who called out to her.

“Oh, hey.”

“My intuition told me I might find you here. I’ve got to tell you about what happened today at the-…hey are you okay?”

Heizou paused mid sentence after taking a closer look at Shinobu. She was making bracelets out of naku weed and sango pearls, but something was wrong. Her back was unusually straight, her eyebrows slightly furrowed, her movements on the bracelet were sharper than needed, and she was switching sitting positions in the sand like twice a minute. She seemed…bored. Restless. Anxious.

“Yeah, I’m fine, why?”

“I’m here to talk if you need. Somethings wrong.” Heizou said, sitting down next to her.

Shinobu sighed and looked back down at the bracelet she had just finished making.

“Nothing crazy serious, I guess I’ve just been bored. I’ve done all I needed to do today, but the idea of doing nothing is just uncomfortable…It’s weird. I’m always cleaning up after the gang’s messes, but now..”

“You don’t know what to do now since there aren’t any messes to clean.” He finished for her.

“Yeah, pretty much. Gotta keep myself busy.”

“I take it that’s why you’re making bracelets by the sea?”

“I’ve got nothing better to do, so yeah. Just a hobby to pass the time.”

“They’re beautiful.”

Shinobu smiled. She looked back up at Heizou to find him marveling at the one currently in her hand. Little sango pearls were intertwined in a wreath of naku weeds. She’d been wanting to make bracelets with them ever since she picked some up during Boss’s rock and roll event at watatsumi island.

“You want one?”

“Only if there are extras.”

She opened the bag next to her to reveal she had made quite the supply of bracelets already.

“Woah…you’ve been here a while, I see.”

“Heh, yeah. By the sea is a nice place to be.”

“That rhymed.”

“Thank you.”

They sat in silence for a little longer, admiring the coming sunset before Heizou spoke up again.

“I also noticed you aren’t wearing your mask at the moment.”

“I felt like breathing the air by the ocean a little better. It helps when you need calming down. And I don’t have to keep the mask on if it’s just you here, you know who I am.”

“I guess that’s true. Still, it’s not often I get to see you without it.”

“Enjoy it while it lasts.” Shinobu said, already almost done with her next bracelet. “This one is gonna be yours.”

“Ooh, really? It’s an honor to watch the craftsman work.” He said peering excitedly at his future bracelet in-the-making.

She finished up quickly and handed it to him.

“I added an extra sango pearl, cause you’re one of my best friends.”

“Awww, really? That means so much, Shinobu, thank you.” Heizou said, his expression softening greatly. He looked like this emoji 🥺.

“Y-yeah..” Shinobu mumbled, averting her eyes.

“Aww, are you blushing?” He teased, moving a little closer to get a better look.

“No! And stop awwing at me!” She hid her face, preventing him from getting that better look.

Heizou pouted. “Shinobu come onnn, I never get to see your face! Especially not your blushing one, you can’t deny me this opportunity.”

“Shut up. You’ve seen me blush before anyway…”

“But not without the mask! Pleaseee?”

“I would rather plunge in the sea in front of us.”

Yeah, she won’t budge. Heizou has to use his secret weapon now.

From where he was sitting next to her, he wrapped his arms around her in a hug and looked up at her with puppy eyes.

“Pleaseeee?”

“H-hey! Careful! I’m not even gonna look at you.” She said, flinching first at the sudden contact but still keeping her face hidden with her hands and knees.

“Hm, “careful”, you say?”

The silence was loud. She couldn’t see his face, but she knew exactly what expression he had on.

“Wipe that smirk off your face off your face, and don’t even think about it.”

Heizou giggled mischievously. One because he did in fact have a smirk on his face, and two because he now had a new idea. An idea to get her to finally show her face, and you know, maybe help her feel a little better.

“Careful? Careful with what?” He said, lightly tapping at her sides. Nothing unbearable, but still getting a reaction.

“Heizou, noho! I’ll kill you! Don’t even try!”

“Threatening a detective with murder now, huh? I thought we were best friends, Shinobu.” He said sarcastically, glancing at his new bracelet on his wrist.

Shinobu tried desperately to squirm out of his hold. It was over for her if he went through with this, she’ll never hear the end of it.

“I personally can’t believe I didn’t think of how ticklish you can be earlier!”

“Heizou I swehehear…”

“Oh, this is good for me. Now I’ll get to see your blushing face and your laughing face without the mask at the same time!” Heizou said, picking up the pace and now scribbling his fingers at her sides.”

“Noho you wohohohont! Heheizohou!!” She giggled, her hands instinctively grabbing his wrists. However, unfortunately, due to his place behind her, she had much less leverage and it was quite futile.

“You’re suhuhuch a piehece of shihihit! AHAha-!! Asshohole!” At her remark he gave her a quick tase to the side, clearly elevating her reaction.

“Now that’s no way to talk to one of your best friends.”

“Shhuhut the fuck uhuhup!! You’re nohohot my behehest friehehend, dickhead!” She retorted, squirming in any way she could to not show him her face in this state.

“Really? I guess that extra pearl was a mistake then…I’m hurt Shinobu, really.” Heizou said, not hurt at all. He knows she doesn’t mean it at all, hell he’ll yell similar things when he’s on the receiving end too. That still doesn’t mean he’ll have mercy just yet, however. He moved one hand up by her ribs, the other hand down by her stomach, and dug in. Not too much pressure, but just enough.

“HeheHEHEY!!” Shinobu laughed. Now he was currently attacking two of her bad spots at the same time, and she knew that he damn well knew what he was doing too.

“HEIZOHOUU!”

“Shinobuuu!”

She continued to giggle brightly, not caring about hiding her face anymore and instead kicking her legs and thrashing around (adorably by the way) and doing whatever she could to escape.

Since hiding her face was no longer Shinobu’s top priority, Heizou had no problem finally seeing her laughing/blushing face without a mask.

“Aww, I see you now~” He teased, grinning down at her wide smile. He began to slow down, having got what he wanted and not wanting her revenge to be too devastating.

“Ahahrehe you happy?”

“Very happy.”

“Greheheat, you can stohohop.”

Taking her for her word that she’s had enough, he finally stopped his attack on her midsection and let her breathe as she slumped on his shoulder.

“Asshole.”

“You know it was fun.”

“You’re still an asshole.”

“Come on, look how relaxed you are now. Much better than how I found you earlier. Oh right, speaking of, I was gonna tell you-“

“Apapap, wait one second.” Shinobu interrupted. “I just want you to know I’ll get you back for your cruelty today, when you least expect it. Could be in a few seconds, could be in a few days. Your intuition won’t be able to save you, detective.”

It was Heizou’s turn to be nervous. Maybe not nervous, actually, more like excited. Anticipation always made things more fun! Not that he’d admit it in this moment.

“Mmmm…o-okay…” He shrank in on himself while Shinobu sat next to him, her eyes hungry to see him in her same position. It always amazed him how easily she could bounce back from getting tickle attacked.

“A-anyway, the four of them in their cells-“ He continued, making the most of the time he has left before his inevitable doom.

Heizou shared the story of how the gang managed to get fellow inmates singing along with them in prison, and they discussed various Arataki gang stories until the sun set.

And yes, Shinobu did eventually get him back.

————————————————————————

@adrienisweird @emiefluff HI GUYS I WROTE SOMETHING

again I apologize for bad writing I just kind of wrote as I went and lost myself in it. Still getting the hang of it but I hope u guys like it and I hope it’s a good start!!

[cannonball-37]

Something to yap about?

How about your fav ships?

Or the best headcanons ya have?

Your opinion on the labyrinth?

You can choose any

-♠️

Ohh I like these questions so I’m gonna answer all of them.

1. Favourite ships

I am a multishipper so I have many but I’ll try and narrow it down a bit

Alibends

Runestraw

BendyRuneStraw

BendyStraw

Osix

Alibends: I love these two! But I swear if they don’t figure stuff out I’m gonna lose my stardust- Alice trying to find books on demon and angel love stories is adorable and her mother is supportive of it which gives me hope for them! I worry about Bendy trying to keep his distance as he thinks Alice and Jake are together but I hope that gets cleared up the second they actually talk again. (Bendy if you don’t answer Alice’s calls-)

Runestraw: The development of this ship is going great so far in the story. The gala broke me a bit but we’re going strong! Cup needs to sort out his issues for sure before they can truly be together and I hope it happens soon! Holly loving to learn about his race and where he comes from is so cute and I need them to get together at some point.

BendyRuneStraw: I LOVE THIS!!!! I’ve been a fan of BendyStraw for ages and the combo of that and RuneStraw GIVES ME LIFE! Holly loving learning about the dish race and Bendy’s time in Hell while she talks about her own experimentations with magic and suggesting things for the both of them to try out some day is a really cute idea and I fell like they mesh together so well.

BendyStraw: A classic. People were shipping these two before QFTIM was even a thing. Plus IMs development of their characters and the addition of their soul tie where they can feel each other’s emotions adds another layer to this which could be great for fluff and hurt/comfort scenarios as demonstrated by the authors already.

Osix: What can I say? Gay middle aged men is an amazing trope and these two are so good for each other. Obviously Ozzy needs to heal from losing his wife and slowly he has been! Felix is understanding of his reluctance to start a relationship and they’re honestly the most healthy ship apart from the already established ones like Mugs and Cala.

2. My opinion on the labyrinth(yea I’m doing this out of order)

I’ll be honest, while reading I was really cussing confused and it look 3 re-reads for me to understand what was happening but I think that actually proves how difficult the labyrinth has been for the Questers.

It opened up a lot of info about the characters such as Felix, Cup and Bendy and it shows just how dangerous the machine parts can get. It even caused lasting damage like Bendy and Boris’ estranged relationship, Cups heart, Felix mistrust of the Cupbros, Boris’ connection to the instrument etc.

I hate Sarah with a burning passion and I think the night terror is a really cool creature design (even if it did tear cups heart out). The way that stupid bird tried to get out into the real world was actually really clever but I am mad at what it had done emotionally to Bendy and causing him to go beastly.

The instrument needing to be played and choosing Boris as its guardian was genius storytelling and again I love the lasting effect of “Boris could go off the deep end and use the instrument at any moment”.

I love the instruments current use of finding information on the machine and why it’s so hidden. The information on the creators of it, the ancient Mugman, how the machine cured the sick etc are really useful for theorist like myself and put even more mystery to this already mysterious story.

3. My best headcanons

Honestly this is hard for me cause I don’t really do headcanons that often. If I have ideas they usually spiral out of control and become their own AUs. However I will try and pick up some I’ve picked up along the way from others or made up myself.

Cup and Bendy snitch on eachother whenever they’re feeling bad and argue about it even though they both do it.

The CupBros eyes glow in the dark and so does Cup’s hair cause it’s made of magic. So does the liquid magic in their heads.

Cup and Bendy shut themselves in their rooms to cry sometimes when they’re feeling down because they don’t want anyone to see.

Cup is an insomniac

Cup has vague memories of what his parents were like before they left while Mugs has none

Cup can and will kill Brute the second Fanny says he can

Demi has wanted to go back home to her kids but can’t for some reason

When they were younger Cup would sing Mugs to sleep if he ever had a nightmare

The Cupbros once has a magic flu scare while under hats care because he took their straws as punishment and forgot about it for a while until the Cupbros started getting sick

If Cups more demonic powers develop he could be considered a middle class or high class demon

The cupbros take the others out at night to go stargazing sometimes

If Cup is that pissed at someone he’ll start cursing at them in every language he know

I realise a lot of these are Cuphead centric. 🤦‍♀️That’s what I could come up with rn. I hope I answered your questions well!

[otomes-and-tears]

Hello,I hope you had a good day! I have an OL2 request if that's alright!!

In step 2,with Qiu,GN-Reader,Best Friend status with both Qiu and Tamarack and Qiu is just pining over their best friend,MC. How would Qiu realize their crush on MC? How would they act around MC who shows their love thru physical affection towards their neighbors?

Basically what im asking is 'the brooding,pining one x the oblivious,affectionate one' but it's with Qiu and MC :D!! (A LIL SIDE NOTE/ASK ADDITION : Maybe MC is also insecure abt themselves,thinking that they're not that lovable or smth,maybe cuz of their looks if u know what I mean?? THANKS FOR WRITING FOR OL2 BTW IT MEANS A LOTTT <3)

(side note 2 : sorry if this isn't that understandable,english isn't my first language 🙇‍♀️)

♦ Qiu having a crush on a physically affectionate and oblivious GN!MC ♦

► tags and warnings: -

► words: 861

► A/N: Please don't apologise! Your english is great, anon ♡ I'm also not a native English speaker!

► Masterlist

I think they’ve always been aware that MC was different from their other friends;

As a kid, they remember other friends complaining about Qiu’s giving MC special treatment, and as someone preoccupied with fairness it used to annoy them to no end;

Because they knew it was true, they just didn’t understand why they felt so compelled to treat them this way;

As they grew up and the idea of romantic love became a less threatening, more concrete concept, it didn’t take them too long to piece it together;

MC was always there for Qiu, always ready to show them support and kindness and to look out for them, when Qiu was used to other people relying on them to be like that;

They’d watch them laughing at something Tamarack said and would just feel this… warmth in their chest;

Like this was something they’d need to protect;

The world could be a cruel place, but MC’s kindness and their laughter was the one thing Qiu wanted to preserve;

I don’t think Qiu had this grand moment of realisation;

It happened one night, right at the beginning of autumn, when the leaves started falling and the nights grew colder;

They both agreed to meet in Qiu’s backyard in the early hours of the evening to look at the stars through a telescope together;

Mc managed to bring their favourite tea in a thermos, and gave Qiu the biggest hug once they saw them;

They were just… so happy. Being awake at odd hours of the night trying not to be too loud to not wake Qiu’s parents from their slumber;

Watching the stars and talking about mythology;

Mc started rambling about something they had read and stopped in the middle of it, apologizing about speaking too much;

And Qiu found that they didn’t mind it;

Not only that, they welcomed it. They loved how passionate MC was, how happy and comfortable they had been all night;

Qiu didn’t want them to stop at all, and they realized that they wanted to be the person that MC went to when they wanted to talk about these things;

Well… when people described love it always seemed so overwhelming, and in some aspects it was;

But it mostly just felt right;

Their name is Qiu, their friends call them Autumn, and they are in love with MC;

It’s been a part of them for a long time, and was just nice to finally understand that part of themselves;

Not too much changed after that, only that perhaps their affection and special treatment became more blatant;

In their teens, MC is one of the few people Qiu can stand to be around, and after they’ve realised their feelings they started relying on MC a bit more;

Because Qiu trusts them with that!;

Honestly? MC’s affection is one of the things that keep Qiu going;

MC, despite their obliviousness, ends up noticing and making sure to support them whenever he needs it most;

When Qiu is having a bad day MC will just… Wrap them in a hug and stay there for as long as Qiu needs;

If MC noticed how fast Qiu’s heart beats when they hug, they never mention it;

There are also more subtle types of affection;

Like linking their arms together while walking, grabbing their hand to lead them somewhere or just leaning against Qiu when they’re tired;

Even with all their angst, MC’s affection is always a sure way to soften them;

Qiu will often pinch their cheeks or pat them on the head and lightly tease them for being touchy;

I’m pretty sure Qiu’s love language is acts of service, but knowing how important physical affection is to the MC, Qiu will make sure to initiate it too;

Honestly, I don’t see Qiu as a very jealous person, and knowing Tamarack for years and being close to her, I don’t think that they’re jealous about MC showing her affection too;

Instead, it makes them happy that MC is surrounded by good people that care about them as much as Qiu does;

Tamarack ends up noticing their crush eventually;

I mean… I’m sure everyone knows about it except MC themselves;

And even if she seems a little too invested in it and will sometimes give Qiu a hard time about it in private, she’s very supportive;

And it means a lot to them to have MC’s other best friend support them like that;

In regards to MC being insecure… Qiu doesn’t get it at all;

How can someone that amazing be insecure about themselves? How can they worry about not being loveable enough, not interesting enough? Not beautiful enough?;

And they’re fucking pissed at anyone who would ever make MC feel that way;

MC is a person that Qiu cares about deeply, even if they’re colder at that age, there’s no way they just let them think so little of themselves if they can help it;

So… MC is one of the few people that Qiu will make a big effort with;

They make sure MC knows how special they are, and how beautiful of a person both inside and out!

[neitherabaron]

Hello Kofi! Im a super big mechs fan, and I just recently realized that I had a bunch of ur songs in my playlist from before I knew the mechs and as soon as I noticed I started like freaking out (in a good way) I’m glad that ur still posting! It makes me happy whenever I see you post :)

My ask is: if you know about TMA (The Magnus Archives) what type of avatar would you be? Also, what’s your favourite dnd class?

Honestly, that is super cool (and maybe the first time someone's told me about things happening that way around)!

I have a personal policy of not really talking about Magnus on social because it's really nothing to do with me, I just happen to be friends/related to a few people who were on it. So any opinions I might express about it aren't super relevant anyway and at worst kind of risk being taken a little too seriously and clouding the issue. I think it's made with passion and charm and craft by several people I love, and that anyone who's interested in supernatural horror should at least give it a try, and that's kind of all that's relevant to say! (People don't ask me very often, tbf)

I think it might be wizards? My current character is a wizard and the class feels aglow with options and possibilities, where some other classes unlock cool and satisfying abilities but feel a bit funneled when it comes to customisation.

[dailykatnep]

Yeah, KatNep didn't sail canonically, but at least Homestuck's nature as a meta multiverse story that treats fan stories that don't happen in canon as valid due to its nature, with some Lord Englishes that want to destroy those alternatives and just wants his Alpha Timeline stuff to be the only thing. In the endless realm of possibilities, how would you write them starting a romantic relationship with each other? I'm pro'ly tone-deaf and too serious in asking a blog that posts funny-but-somehow-oddly-warm drawings something like this. Or maybe there's fanfic of this ship you'd recommend?

It's very easy for me, a fan, to do a "how it should have ended" style thing. Homestuck is just that series where whenever a discussion is brought up, even with idealistic passion, it will always turn into a rant about how it should have gone.

But ignoring all of that, here's how Katnep could work.

(this is very rambly because im a very rambly person heads up)

The two main things is that they both need to get over themselves. Karkat works on himself a lot throughout the series, letting people in his life, learning to enjoy the company around him without screaming profanity at them, and realizing what he takes for granted. Nepeta is never given that opportunity since she has like 7 whole conversations and then dies.

If she were to survive (which would have to rewrite Murderstuck) then she would have to either get over her silly crush and see Karkat as, y'know, just a person OR she would have to decide to be confident and decide to talk to him, trying to become his friend & then romantic partner.

Karkat brings up in a conversation with Eridan that he does see her as a person, and not the "kitty cat shipper cave girl" but he avoids her because he's 13 and doesn't know how to let her down easily.

If Murderstuck were to still happen, Karkat could console her through the loss of a friend, trying to make amends for how he treated her through her pain. He would have to decide to stop avoiding her and have to help her out, like a responsible leader.

Since Eridan is dead, Karkat also would not have anyone to gossip about relationship stuff with (which was a thing he and Eridan had) so Nepeta could easily replace that conversational hole that Karkat has.

I feel like end-game Katnep would be-

Nepeta no longer holds Karkat on a pedestal, not an infatuation but a friend (romance can happen later but right now she would need to see him as a person and not a cool endgame red romance)

Karkat grows up and stops excluding Nepeta just because he's afraid of the awkward eventual conversation between her and him.

Karkat would start roleplaying with Nepeta and Nepeta would read Karkat's tomes of romantic literature, they could even get into petty arguments about which character deserves which character.

There would be cool motifs between the Blood Aspect and the Heart Aspect. Like could you imagine?

Cool Sufferer Disciple art while Karkat and Nepeta fall for each other, as if they are fated to be together (even if Karkat doesn't care for the ancestor shit.) and yeah idk

[awesamforehead]

Tag at least six people (can be more than six if you want), and say at least one nice thing about or to each of them. Can be mutuals, can be people you follow, can be people you don’t know but just happen to exist in the same circle(s) with. All you gotta do is tag them and say something nice about/to them :)

Thank you @mahikamihan (the nicest and sweetest person here) for the tag! Ignore that its been a few days shhhh I was actually thinking of doing this on my priv but then this showed up so perfect opportunity :D Its a big one so everyone will be under a read more so Im not clogging the dash

@gogtopia Jules, you were the first person I followed when I was revamping my blog last year, the first person that came to mind on who I knew was safe post October. Although this was long ago, I really enjoyed the discussions we had about lore and such on discord that was a fun time. And now you're on the path of getting my into The Yard more too lol

@i-anonymous-crow Crow crow crow crow. You were the first (literally the first) people to follow me and it was all because I was crying over the Las Nevadas gift for ckarlnapity. And since then we've cried some more together. And now we're here, thank you for giving me a chance

@foolishfreckles Moss my beloved. Actually one of the chillest people I know and a really great clipper. Another person who has been here since pretty much the beginning (like when I had 20 followers) and one of my biggest supporters. If you arent already following Moss what are you doing. I also love the Foolish screenies you try to get every stream

@traidyy LUCKY!!!!!!! :D SWEETEST PERSON AND GREAT ARTIST THEIR ART IS SO CUTE. also a karl fan so thats 1000 more attractive points. But actually one of my favorite people here, wuv u Lucky <3 the dog to my cat

@sapybara INY!! Somehow you are the most rational but also the most chaos inducing person here and I love you for that. Whenever dash is all fucky and im beginning to spiral, your post are usually the ones who help pull me back up. Also your sapybara pfp is the cutest thing ever.

@vadergf REY REY! The would be drolo of my heart and the realest person when it comes to the green man. Your anons are hilarious and your art is so cute, no matter what you might say. Also thank you for supporting me like with the dteam hourly account i really appreciate it

@simplepotatofarmer Loyal! :D this is a thank you for always wanting and trying to make the fandom a better place. So many people give you the worst shit and yet you try to give second chances and show kindness. Thats something very rare to find nowadays. I love your aus like the rabbit and black dog au, and your chicken posts are some of my favorite things (all hail dream (chicken) )

@toxicsapolo Hi Salty! The og sapolo, the one who paved the way. Even though I have no idea what you and Adora are talking about with the F1 fandom, Ive admired how passionate you are when it comes to your interests. Sapnap, fashion, cooking, your boyfriend.

@tinynap JO!!! Your liveblogs never fail to make me laugh, even if half of them give you a tummy ache. I also want to say im proud of you trying your best at college, even at your roughest nights. You're gonna do great, kid

@dralbum NIICCCKKK!!! Ok not only is your art gorgeous and gives the softest feeling, you are also one of the funniest motherfuckers here. I enjoy our time on privtwt where we ask to eat each others food lmao

@faehrys ARIA MY ARIA!!! Not only an awesome editor, but also an awesome person. I appreciated how you tried to keep a positive space during the rough time, but also knowing when to stand your ground. And as always, karl enjoyer so extra cool points :>

@negativepeanuthoarder PEANUT!!! A true squirrel in which they stick around and make a home in your heart. You are always the loudest supporter in my writing and I really appreciate that, especially on the harder days

@knffuckraw ACE!!! Another funny person here and also representing the inner haikyuu fans (along with Iny). You have the greatest comebacks for anons and the funniest tags. love you ace <3

@dreamnotnapss First, a thank you for your services they’re greatly appreciated and you be missed by many. Second, a thank you for supporting everyone you could within our circle and even beyond. We’ll remember you fondly

@selvish HI TENDER!! we interact much more on twitter lol but youre one of my favorite people, big karl enjoyer and created some of my favorite fics like Y&OY, Rules, Favorite Place, and when we’re older 💜

@secretkoalasandwich EMMI MY BELOVED. ok tbh when we first started following each other I was so nervous cause you had a Wil pfp but now youre one of my favorite people lol. My brethren of punzblr, always ready to simp with me. Also an amazing artist with the most amazing blending skills youve ever seen youre telling me this is a painting??? anyways 10/10 spectacular amazing wow

@canonicallykayfabe EACHTRA!! Some of the most beautiful art here, both in a more cartoony style and one that holds slight realism. The color choices are fantastic as well. Along with that, you have some really thought provoking posts that I really appreciate like the banter discussion post awhile ago.

@sapnapstummy BLAZE THE KINDEST PERSON HERE 100%. legit i dont think ive ever seen you post a neg post about anything thats impressive. also i want to say i love how youll go back to either dreamtummy or sapnaptummy, so iconic and so true.

@dnapsnfsapnap PIGEON!! We’re semi newish mutuals but I’ll always welcome new sapnap fans into my life. On par with Salty, Jo, and Blaze, you fit right in with the sapolo ideology and i think thats amazing. You can always get the cutest screenies of Sapnap and I love your frog posts as well ^-^

@snfbabydrop Ive said this multiple times but thank you for your work on dreamnotnapss. The safe haven for multishippers in our corner. Aside from that, you are one of the nicest people Ive met here, never let your sunshine get blocked out

Also shoutout to my awesome mutuals who I dont talk to often but still love 💜

[gaypeople4itzy]

Hope is better than despair

With itzy’s yuna

Part 1 of two !!

word count : 1,3k

Warnings : a bit angsty im sorry :,(

One of my favorites again hehe^^

Your heart sank as snow began falling on the city’s roof, the holidays were approaching, and despite the cheerful atmosphere around you, you still didn’t feel that joy the way everyone else did, at least, not like you used to

Nostalgia is a vast concept, some people miss their parents’ house, miss playing around in the neighborhood, miss their teachers, miss the innocence of being a child, miss the spark they had in their eyes at that time;

And sometimes, there are people that miss others

You were one of these people, there was someone, probably the person you had ever been the closest to, that had deserted your life a couple years back, and strangely enough, it seemed as if time had stopped since then

You thought to yourself it was a foolish decision as you sat down to your kitchen table, a paper, and a pen in front of you. You had been telling yourself that for the entire week, since that idea had crossed your mind, you kept debating inside if it was incredibly stupid, or rather, something that could change your future greatly

Yuna and you were insepperable, since the very first moment you looked at each other, you instently clicked. There was something between the two of you that was beyond anyone’s else understandimg. Quite frankly, you didn,t need to grasp the concept of the connection you shared with her, as long as she was next to you, and that you were next to her, that’s all that mattered

You did everything together, going from accompanying her whenever she had detention, to pairing up for every single project, to throwing snowballs on the face of the other before heading inside freezing, to spending days cuddling and watching your favorite movies, there was not one of your lives where Yuna did not have a special place in it

And as you two grew up, your feelings evolved towards the other. It started with Yuna being even more protective than she usually was, wrapping her arms around you whenever someone thought it was a good idea to try and flirt with you. You started feeling warmer than you used to around her, feeling this strange urge to always be close to her. As time passed by, Yuna’s actions became more and more evident that you guys weren’t just friends, if it wasn’t for her constant teasing, nor her attempts at making you blush, it was certainly her kisses that she’d give you, claiming it was just “marking her territory so the others would know you’re hers”

It took a long while before you both had enough courage to confess to the other, trembling as she held you, you shared the most passionate kiss that night. It was so memorable that to this day, it is still vivid in your head

The months that followed were pure paradise, there was not a moment where you didn’t feel at ease with each other, it was the sweetest and purest relationship you had ever experienced

However, you had to let her go before you were ever ready to do so. Yuna’s parents had been talking about moving away for a few weeks by then, and they had finally taken their decision

That night was difficult, hard because you had both decided it would be best to not continue talking to the other, that the distance would be too hard, that it would be painful to not have each other to hold on to but than it was better than to hold on a glimpse of false hope

Yuna held you tight that night, she whispered many things to you, wished you the best life ever, and promised you that you would never be forgotten

As she head outside, out of your door, while you did your best to smile at her, wanting her to have a good last memory of you both being together

Your head was fuzzy, it was difficult to comprehend what was happening at that moment. Although you could barely see nor hear anything, due to feeling extremely drained, you thought for a second that she had said something,

Something like,

“The universe will send us back together, I promise you”

And you weren’t sure if your brain had just tricked you, or if truly, she had meant that

To this day, you still were unsure of those words, but a discobvery had made you change your mind. A few days ago, you had been called by your parents, as they wanted you to come home for the Holidays, and of ourse, you couldn’t refuse spending time with the people you most loved

After a few hours listening to your mother rant about stories you had already heard, your father had interrupted her, mentioning that he had found a box with a bunch of your old stuff. Excitedly enough, he had given you indications as to where it was located in the house

And now you were here, a few days later, with Yuna’s “new” address (at the time) in mind. While going through the box, you had found a little note, and you could almost immediately recognize her handwriting. You almost felt your heart explode when your eyes read the following : “My angel, I’m so scared my parents are going to make us move out sooner than they are supposed to. If they do, and you ever want to contact me, please know that my address will be…”

It was such a strange feeling as you realized what the paper was saying. If Yuna knew her address the entire time, and had purposely hid that in your stuff, why didn’t she just directly tell you where she lived ? Why didn’t she want to make things work ?

Firstly upset, you tried to ignore the flame you thought was gone a long time ago. Although you kept avoiding the subject and resisted the best you could, there was no other way than to face what you felt : you were still in love with her

So you began writing to her, maybe she wouldn’t open the letter, or wouldn’t even get it, but it didn’t matter, you felt as if not writing her today would mean loosing something far more important than anything else in your life

So you went ahead : 

Dear Yuna, 

I recognize that you might not remember me, and I would understand why

[…]

I hope you too, regret losing the other

[…]

May you be well 

[…]

If this ever gets to you, you are free to respond to me

[…]

Please know that you too, have never been forgotten

Yours truly,

Y/N

For once, you wanted to believe that the universe was on your side. You knew well enough that you could end up heartbroken, but the tiny bit of hope that was left was all you had, and it was better to accept it than to pretend the thought of a happy ending didn’t exist

[darlingpwease]

What?? I'm not even trying to escape this time 😭😭 she sounds so cool tho,, I don't know anyone irl who reads those kind of novels, and the people online who write about them are small so I always get excited when I see people talk/write about it lmao,, so she sounds amazing to talk to (I bet she was wonderful either way but I think you know what I mean)

That's alright <333 I absolutely love reading web novels,, so I read those kind of stories a lot

From me??? I just don't think it was ever brought up before for me to mention it. I think they're safe <333 /t ...👀 they're really good I'd suggest reading them some time

KNOW this novel? I practically BREATHED it when I first read it /j

🎉🎉

AAA so good so good <<333

He'd be so adorable clinging to you. When you first met him (again), you originally thought that it would be you following him, not the other way around. Maybe getting jealous over your past self, so whenever you go and take Xie Lian on a date, you do so to replace those memories with who you are now. Xie Lian has even caught on to it after a while, but he can't bare to tell you that not only do you have no reason to be jealous over yourself, but also that you're already doing something you've done before <//333

That doesn't make him any less happy though, he happily indulges you. Every new object you buy him is always similar to one you've done before, every festival you take him to, you both have already celebrated, every mountain to camp in and river to swim in, there's always a trace of you two. Not that either are complaining though.

Yes yes,, I agree I agree. Both are good, very good.

-panna cotta

🤨🤨🤨I can't trust you. the only thing I can do is believe that if I grab you by your fox tail, you won't run any further🙄 /t /j yes yes~ she was very absorbed in what she liked and passionate, and although she was too perfectionist, she was very sweet and loving to talk about her thoughts. we stopped communicating after I gave up my old works, but I still hope that everything is fine with her and she is now doing what she loves<3 (bad for them, though, I sympathize with everyone who doesn't know my cute flower boy<///3)

mhm,,, I prefer novels about transmigrators and the like than exclusively xiaxia — with rare exceptions</3 luo binghe my beloved<//3

I mean, you can enter topics without me having to raise the green flag🤨 our relationship is now an imbalance of power I see🙄😒 /t /hj I almost finished reading svsss at the time and accidentally found the 'blessing', but I could not bring myself to read the demonic cultivator, although it looks the most interesting and tragic,,, but I will accept your words, just because of your not completely fox-like authority, and at least some faith in your words.

🎤🎤🎤 tell me something else, I'm listening carefully, I don't trust simple words on the Internet!!! /t /j who are your favorite characters??? /gen

husband material<3333 im so so so in love with him until yuuta does not appear in front of me</33333

xie lian looks,,,, looks like a puppy. the very obsessive, emotional, sensitive and gentle puppy who puts chin on your palm and smiles like the july midday sun when everything around you seems to shine, emphasizing his extraterrestrial beauty, — only to be able to protect you from everything by more than cruel and ferocious methods, not allowing anything else and no one to take you away from him, going against what should happen when xie lian finds you again and again, eventually becoming so good at it that he begins to feel when you reappear and be yours a shadow by the time you were already mature enough that the thread of your destiny began to weave — and was cut and intertwined into one where he would be the only thing in your life.

the Gods cannot interfere with what is about to happen, but he has already sunk down enough and has been overthrown not only and not so much by heaven, but also by you, kissing you while your fingers slide along his neck, stroking the marks on his thin skin, almost forgetting that he is a God, that he is much stronger and powerful than you when xie lian looks at you from the bottom up, touching your palms with lips and letting you let his hair down, enjoying the painfully familiar unfamiliar look; for a moment you see the most gentle and kind young man, looking with bright naive eyes, kind and impulsive, spoiled by the world and fate itself, not yet knowing either the dirt or the sadness of the world — eccentric, but divine, like only a soaring bird or the first ray of the sun after a hundred years of harsh winter. he was like a kaleidoscope of colors, unblemished by nothing but his morality, desire and you, stealing kisses from you while no one is looking, timidly intertwining his fingers with you, learning something like this for the first time — your prince was bright, colorful, intense and loud, he was everywhere and always with you, while your god was gentle, quiet and calm, like a gentle timid wildflower, much more beautiful than any decorative ones, but at the same time not at all the way you remembered the one who scratched your heart like a kitten with a claw. and you know that he sees it in your eyes, for a moment kissing more jealously and rudely, as if forcing you to think about him now, about what he is doing now, childishly hating when he saw in your eyes not himself now, but the prince who caused your death,

who killed you.

he tells you that you've met before, he knows you even when he was a prince, like a demon whispering to you about the time when you were almost lovers, and he promised that you would become Gods together and be always together, that he would protect you from everything and you would make this world perfect, — and you have strangely detailed dreams about a kingdom that no longer exists, and a facial craze, forcing you to wake up in a cold sweat while xie lian lies nearby, not needing sleep, but just wanting to be there with you — and immediately feeling that your heartbeat is going crazy while you're breathing hoarse, loud, scared, and he's gently soothing you, without asking what you dreamed, as if not for the first time encountering this,

and for a moment you are bitter that you may not be his first "you".

while he goes further, sees more, hears more, while you only look back, seeing that he has become different, and each time your memories are more and more mixed — when you were the child of a rich peasant, when you were the child of a rich merchant's concubine, when you were the eldest child of a high-ranking general, when you were a member of the royal family, when you became the child of a famous scholar from the city — and there he is, always he is, always leading you away from how it should be, as if already at the moment when you were born, your fate was intertwined with his, no matter in which state you were born or where, he will always find you. and the more memories mixed about it, the more thoughts mixed with others, the more glances, no longer understanding whether he looks at you or at that peasant, or at that townsperson, or at that heir to the kingdom — or as his future spouse, as if you can only be his spouse, to be with him like mandarin ducks, whom everyone is trying to separate with the help of blows of a stick on the water.

you are devoted to him, he is the only God in whom you believe, you know that you will never leave him and you will never stop believing in him — but you have limits when you no longer understand what you are doing, while xie lian only becomes even more clingy and needy, bringing you to your home, where it is very conveniently, he takes care that the house in the forest is comfortable and clean when you return, even if can't cook you anything delicious despite all attempts.

when he almost obsessively tries to make you understand that this is a beautiful house, with beautiful things, in a beautiful place, very beautiful and nice, as you love, he knows how you love, and you just... you get... tired. knowing that you are constantly repeating yourself, because you do not change the same way as he does, do not remember everything, do not know what you did and did not do until deja vu pounces on you, as if humiliating you in the fact that you constantly go to the same places. this is good at first, but the period of your reincarnation is painfully short, as if you are just floating around the world until you find a suitable body instead of passing the circle of reincarnation; and although xie lian becomes even more and more obsessive with you every time, even more dependent, feeling how his world becomes stable and correct while you are around, it hurts you to understand that you have nothing to give him.

you adore him, you are absolutely loyal to him and absolutely devoted, and you know how painful your lives are without him, and how you remember all your lives and his when you see his gentle soft figure, but maybe that's why you will never be equal to him.

because you are so full of love for him and his love for you that you will never be able to ascend until you feel everything that is meant for you.

hehehe~ panna cotta of culture, I see<3333

[moldwood]

i have 15 minutes before my work day starts, so why not have some reflections on 2023 for the lunar new year since my zodiac the dragon returns to me ☀️

PASSION

at the very end of the year, i did something i had always wanted to do and stepped down from work into a substitute position so i could focus on my art. it has been... slow, but i think it was the right move. whenever im not making something, i really cannot stand life. of course, i wont be able to stand it if i cant eat either, so well see how things turn out by the end of this year. i do think i need to get some art priorities in order, because im jumping around between a lot of projects which means theyre all getting done very slowly. i need to start focusing on one thing at a time, i think, but i really am enjoying the new stronger presence art has in my life.

MOOD

i really feel better than ever in regards to myself! most likely due to the aforementioned outpouring of passion into things ive wanted to do for YEARS. for the past few years, ive been a bit more aware of everything going on in my head than when i was a teen since i was still processing a lot of trauma, so ive been letting myself have a bit more slack on the rope in terms of "acting out of character" if that makes any sense. having a solid personality isnt something i really worry about since i know your sense of self is always shifting in every circumstance, but there were just some ways i never acted before that i let myself try on, find out its not for me, and then i end up feeling even more solid in who i am since i know what im not. i always knew i wasnt a giggly, happy-go-lucky person, but now i know that i can feel that way when i really really like someone. laios im talking about laios i have to be honest.

FRIENDSHIP

i think its my own personal failing that i overlook red flags from friends and try to make excuses for their behavior up until its too late and i have trouble not realizing that giving them an open space to be themself away from the world and support isnt enough to change that some are the type of people who are just looking for an excuse to think poorly of you anyway. i dont think im an overly kind person who will coddle someone being bad to me or a friend, but i definitely dont put my foot down enough. it happens in minor ways, but it happened in a major way again recently. if i had a dime for every time it turned into something severe, i would have two dimes. eight years apart and i let someone do the same thing, just minus suicide baiting me this time

tldr a friend of a friend sent that friend some stuff and it turns out that a friend who is no longer a friend turned into an islamophobe or at least started following islamophobic accounts and is very... delusional about the whole friendship + the kind of people we are + how we thought of him + really just wanted to think the worst of us and felt now he had a reason. we didnt read much more and felt no need to. its for the best that it's over, though, i think. he really was like that the whole friendship and didnt put any value on the things i/we did for him because it was never enough, which i knew the whole time but ignored because i thought if i did enough it would be enough, which leads me to:

i have been focusing more on loving my friends lately in the wake of that. i always have, though im not very vocal/chatty, so ive always shown it in my own way through giving drawings and gifts whenever im able. im never worried that i dont have a place in their lives, and im trying to worry less about the disconnect between how im thought of vs how i am. i think more what i am focusing on now is that i was always a very busy person, so while my friends were always very important to me, i want to do even more to show that since i want them to be sure of it. i dont have much time for any more projects, but i want to make sure they know i would do all i can for them outside of just drawing. i think this will help a bit with feeling more comfortable saying when i think something theyre doing isnt chill to me since the feeling would Hopefully go from me being bossy to me being just looking out for them being their best selves/not letting myself be misunderstood which just happens bc i dont talk very clearly not out of any lack of caring (there is a jumbled mess between my head and my mouth)

i also want to try to make new friends, or at least new acquaintances. theres a few people (mutuals 🥴) ive really wanted to talk to more, but i never know what to say. which makes sense, since i dont even talk with my friends all that much, usually only just whatever comes up in the current conversation in vc. autism damned. that boy cannot hold a conversation for his life. but maybe drawings are the way to go. my hands are all ive got IN SUMMARY

there are more thoughts and i dont have time to reread + word everything all nice because i have to work now. it is all a rambling train of thought mess. BUT tldr: life is really good right now and i feel more solid in the friendships im keeping and i am excited for my future art endeavors now that the last thing i was waiting for (the mixing palette!!!) came in. of course friendship is the longest section its the most important thing to me. anyway dreams for the year quickly ummmmm

✦ i want to learn how to use gouache. i have it! but i have to wait till i get a few projects out to get started. i think this will be very fun and very good for me because its been so long since ive played with a new medium ✦ i want to get better at small talk. how is the weather? do you like this type of weather? what type of weather do you like? what do you like to do when it is that type of weather? ✦ i want to visit prague to see if moving there would be good + feasible. my mom and half sister want to take a trip there, so i really hope that pans out and we can all go! ✦i want to work through my moral ocd about opening up a patreon/kofi and selling merch. people wouldnt subscribe if they didnt already have the money to. it doesnt matter if i make and sell 40 acrylic charms that are plastic and bad for the environment, taylor swift takes a private jet for a 20 minute car ride. ✦ i want to reach a higher fluency with arabic. its hard to find time to practice with my huge workload, so i think once i get better at time management with the projects, i can devote my mornings to a lesson a day and make better progress. ✦ lastly ig i want to try more new foods. i have been for the past several years, but i still am not the best at having good food consistently. im too busy right now to cook every day, so again i guess when i get better at time management between projects and life, i can devote some time in the week to meal prep + cooking good food. thank you laios dungeon meshi for reinforcing this. i already knew it but now theres a hot boy telling me it

2024 the year of more wahoooooo more taking more giving more drawing more cooking more dreaming more sun in the summer

[arcaeda]

deep dive character sheet

stolen from: ree :softsmile: tagging: the dash! if you havent done it yet lmaooo

NAME: CAEDA LOWELL (we love being married phew)

BODY

height: 5'8" / 172 cm

strength ★★★☆☆ (definitely not a monster or anything but well versed, makes up for any lack of strength with her dexterity/nimbleness)

dexterity ★★★★☆ (pegasus knight for many years come on girl)

health ★★★★☆ (takes care of herself very well for others, balanced diet. consistent training routine, etc. )

energy ★★★★☆

beauty ★★★★★ (not just outer beauty, but the way she carries herself and her good heart i think really appeals to others)

style ★★★☆☆ (she takes care to dress herself appropriately but i don't think she has a unique style or anything of the sort. )

hygiene ★★★★☆ 

SKILLS

perception ★★★★☆ ( she is very sensitive to people's feelings and emotions. lots of experience on the battlefield so she is also very aware there)

communication ★★★★★ (she tries not to keep secrets and be honest with others. also her solution for a problem is often "what if you just talked about it lol" so )

persuasion ★★★★☆ (hello girlie who recruited half of marth's army. not infallible but she knows how to touch people's hearts for sure. )

mediation ★★★☆☆ (takes time to herself when she needs it)

literacy ★★★★☆ (would be lower before she met marth and married him. studied really hard for her role as a queen)

creativity ★★★☆☆

cooking ★★★★☆ (a hobbyist so she does make mistakes. but she is very knowledgeable and often tries making new things. she cooks a mean porridge though. count on her for the basics for sure )

tech savvy ☆☆☆☆☆ (not quite sure with this one so im skipping it lol)

combat ★★★★☆ (excels in combat and is always training to be better. definitely trains to be stronger for others and not herself.)

survival ★★★★☆ (she knows her stuff about the wild and adapts pretty well to sudden changes in any situation)

stealth ★★★☆☆ (pretty average.)

street smarts ★★★★☆

seduction ★★★★☆ (not really on purpose unless its with marth and rarely kris)

luck ★★☆☆☆

handling animals ★ ★★★☆ (again. pegasus knight. horse girl but she does well with dogs wyverns etc. )

pacifying children ★★★★☆ ( not the perfect caretaker and some kids can be a little unpredictable but generally she plays along well with them. i.e a toddler talking absolute nonsense and she goes along with it "oh yeah? wow. oh my gosh i cant believe that happened! and then what?" in response to the most nonsense words in the world)

MIND

intelligence ★★★★☆

happiness ★★★★☆

spirituality ★★☆☆☆ (she doesn't play well with magic at all. added a star because she does refer to the gods and what not occasionally)

confidence ★★★★☆ (she always tries to appear confident, because she recognizes that it helps comfort and calms others— but she does have her moments of uncertainty. mostly alone with herself or marth if she can help it)

humor ★★★☆☆ (jokes around to get along with others, she has a good playful side to her)

anxiety ★ ★☆☆☆ (she worries about things sometimes for sure, mainly about the people around her more than herself)

patience ★★★★★ (what that waiting 3 years just to get married do girl. also just. gestures to the entire situation with marth. yeah )

passion ★★★★★

nice         ☆★☆☆☆ mean (by no means the nicest person in the world and she does have types of people she cant forgive but. gives most people a chance for sure)

brave       ★☆☆☆☆ cowardly (there's like no situation that she would be scared to approach. whats that a second war? okay girlie ill be there in ten minutes)

pacifist     ☆★☆☆☆ violent (will try to get people on her side whenever she can for sure, but also recognizes when something is a lost a cause in terms of pacifism)

thoughtful ☆☆★☆☆ impulsive (planting her right in the middle. she takes caution in the every day but she has her impulsive moments absolutely— mostly in the middle of the battlefield.)

agreeable ☆☆★☆☆ contrary (again right in the middle. pretty agreeable on the day to day but there are some things she will not change her stance on no matter how much you try to convince her)

idealistic   ☆☆★☆☆ pragmatic (she isn't blind and knows that the world isn't a great place. does her best to make the world an idealistic person might want though)

frugal        ☆★☆☆☆ big spender (average spender. most of her spending habits were decently frugal when she lived in talys, seeing as it was a little country island. she also fought in war for many years and had to do some rationing during those times. splurges on stuff for others)

extrovert   ★☆☆☆☆ introvert (girl thrives on socializing with others. she does appreciate having quiet moments sometimes but. yeah. all the way extrovert for sure)

collected   ☆★☆☆☆ wild

ambitious / possessive / stubborn / jealous / decisive / perfectionist

SOCIAL

charisma ★★★★★ (ahem. recruits half of marth's army through talking to them. also she recognizes that everyone is different in how they prefer to be approached and what kind of behaviors they are attracted to. )

empathy ★★★★☆

generosity ★★★☆☆ (not just in wealth but in giving people chances as well. there are few people that she would outright call them an enemy from the get go.)

wealth ★★★★☆ ( i mean. as a queen yeah. but she is definitely not the type that looks wealthy or anything. certainly wasn't all that wealthy before she met marth and married him. )

honest  ☆★☆☆☆ deceptive ( of course she tries to be as honest as she can but she as her own secrets that she doesn't just dump on strangers. she doesn't really lie but she can exaggerate the truth)

leader   ☆★☆☆☆follower (she takes naturally to leadership roles for sure. she likes to be there for everyone and to be a stable figure for people in her life. but there are certain people that she doesn't mind just following )

polite    ☆★☆☆☆  rude (definitely has matured a lot in this area.)

political ☆☆★☆☆ indifferent

BELIEFS

higher power ★★★☆☆ (influenced by marth here)

fate/destiny ★★☆☆☆ (she likes the idea of fate/destiny but she does think that most people make their fate and that it doesn't just happen)

magic ★★★☆☆ (knows it exists and its real but not savvy herself)

soulmates ★★★★☆ (thinks her and marth are soulmates, but same thing with fate/destiny. soulmates don't just happen. )

good and evil ★★★☆☆

luck ★☆☆☆☆

PRIORITIES

family ★★★★★

friends ★★★★☆

love ★★★★★

home ★★★☆☆

health ★ ★★☆☆

praise ★☆☆☆☆ (absolutely does not do anything in her life specifically to be praised.)

justice ★★★☆☆

truth ★☆☆☆☆

power ★★★★☆ (not for herself, but in order to keep those close to her safe)

fame ☆☆☆☆☆

wealth ☆☆☆☆☆

others' opinions ★★☆☆☆ (she definitely does care what others think about her, but not by much)

[incorrect-lightlark-facts]

really involved oro/grim situation you say 👀👀 is there any way i can convince you to infodump a little about said situation? im SO GLAD to have found someone else who thinks oro and grim should kiss and i would LOVE to hear some of your thoughts about them

So just as a heads-up, their relationship as I've written it isn't healthy and I won't try to pass it off as such! Between the political tension, the curses, and each of their personal issues, the interpersonal terrain is rocky enough that the odds were always stacked pretty high against them having a chill, healthy romance. Also it's very, very incomplete, so there are a lot of gaps and things I might tweak so that I'm not completely ignoring canon.

The timeline in the book is a bit muddled, but this is a general idea of what I'm working with. Grim and Oro were presumably either adults or older teenagers during the war between Nightshade and Lightlark. In my personal version of events, Grim's father brought Grim and a host of Nightshade soldiers to Lightlark to demand sovereignty over the island, and there Grim and Oro met. They made eye contact over the negotiations table while their guardians were arguing, Grim gave an exaggerated eye-roll that made Oro kind of want to punch him in the nose, and that was their meet-cute. Despite making no progress with diplomacy, Grim's father declared that he would give King Egan a few days to change his mind (in reality, he wanted time to complete his war preparations), which meant that the boys had those few days to run into each other.

Grim had never met any of the other heirs, so he couldn't leave Oro alone. After meeting in the training yard and sizing each other up a bit, they were both a bit... underwhelmed? Grim found Oro dull and neurotic, and Oro found Grim immature and pretentious. In spite of the altogether negative first impressions, they spent a little time sparring and talking about how different their lives were, and no one got hurt. They were both lonely and stressed out of their minds and found much-needed, albeit delicate solidarity in each other.

Of course, the war happened, and it's hard to find the same tentative tolerance for someone who is leading troops against you. Grim was rather detached from the Nightshade cause, just trying to please his father and prove himself as a warrior. Oro feared and resented the way he could slaughter dozens of Lightlark's warriors without even having an emotional force driving him to fight; it dehumanized him in Oro's eyes just as it did in everyone else's.

The situation™️ really started while Grim was living in Lightlark's main castle (I call it Keystone lmao) after Nightshade surrendered. Twenty years is a solid chunk of time to be stuck with anyone, and for the first part of it, Grim was only allowed to go unescorted if he stayed within the castle walls. Harassing Oro was basically his only hobby. There was a huge disconnect between the two of them, though, because Grim was trying to fall back on their old rapport, while Oro had grown to hate him. Grim backed off a little, but whenever Oro would snap and bring up Grim's apathy toward the people he killed, Grim would remind him that people who kill in a fit of passion often commit much worse atrocities. He used similar tactics frequently—"logical" statements that actually dug into Oro's fear of unanticipated consequences. His goal was not to control or coerce Oro, but he wanted attention and was not thinking about how Oro might actually feel. He was lonely and refusing to process his own trauma from the war, and he was really only thinking about himself.

Meanwhile, Oro accidentally found a source of reassurance in Grim, which is great when your primary compulsion is reassurance seeking. Whenever Grim struck a nerve, Oro would use the ensuing argument as a means of self soothing. This meant that they argued often, but to an outside observer, those arguments appeared to become less aggressive and more desperate. Essentially, the two of them formed this messy codependent bond where in the fallout of a devastating war when no one else had time to meet their emotional needs, they drove each other nuts but felt safer together than anywhere else.

So it's a good thing they were both functionally immortal at this point, because this wasn't a fantastic basis to work with. They both had some serious personal growth and recovery to go through, but oops curses, and oops both of their guardians were suddenly dead, and oops they were rulers of realm. On the morning after the old rulers sacrificed themselves for the prophecy, Grim climbed through Oro's window and delivered a panicked speech to the tune of "I want to go home but I don't know how to do this without you." They tried to work out a strategy for taking up their respective guardians' crowns AND deciphering the prophecy, but they made almost no progress and ended up just awkwardly curled up on opposite sides of Oro's bed pretending to sleep for several hours.

The ensuing several hundred years are where I have a loooot of empty space to fill in. I know that they tried to hide their weird dynamic from the other rulers, but even after Grim returned to the Nightshade newlands it was kind of obvious to everyone that something was up. Grim would frequently abuse his Nightshade portal privileges to sneak into the castle and hang around Oro like a weird emo cat. As long as neither of them talked about the war, Oro's brother, or the outside world's belief that Grim was responsible for the curses, they started to genuinely enjoy each other's company. There were a lot more instances of stealing naps in Oro's bed. Someone made the mistake of leaving them alone and they kissed at Azul's wedding. Both of them attempted to have normal relationships during this time, but boy are they not built for that.

Things soured in the century or so leading up to the events of Lightlark mostly because Grim was growing increasingly frustrated with the way Oro separated his personal life from political matters. Nightshade and Lightlark were still not on good terms. Even though there was no rational way Oro could have suddenly reconciled centuries of international hostility, Grim took it personally. The more he started to see how unsustainable Nightshade's isolation and fight against the ~Greater Evil~ (that's a whole other infodump) was, the more he started to believe that his father had a point, and he felt like Oro wasn't making an effort to set aside Egan's biases. Fun fact: Grim can't stop projecting on other people or he'll explode. On top of that, Grim of course noticed that he wasn't being invited to Centennials. Oro was extremely avoidant every time he demanded to know why, and Grim just grew more and more frustrated, and that hard-won feeling of trauma-forged security between them weakened drastically.

The plan for the events of Lightlark (or my equivalent lmao) is to play around with the way Isla finds herself wedged between these two clowns. I know that the climax involves Grim dying for Oro to set up the sequel, wherein the remaining rulers go on an uncomfortable bonding road trip to revive his dumb ass.

ANYWAY, this was a mess and I ended up using a lot of words to say very little, but I want things to get better between them so that they aren't just constructively-interfering waves of unaddressed issues and poor communication.

[castlebyersafterdark]

Among my other passions that have nothing to do with fandom, as well. Be less emotional and excited, already a bit much for a guy 🙄

aww i relate to you sooo much here. what helped you embrace your passionate goofiness vinny? i think for me, whenever i heard people speak knowledgeably about a subject, i got a bit jealous and wonder 'why don't i know that?' . could be about something im not even interested in, but it shows me that theres this whole world/field/community that im not part of, and i want in. i'm more chill now, but it's how i ended up with so much random knowledge and got passionate about loads of things. i also had one amazing friend at university who spoke so uniquely about what they loved, it almost made me feel like an idiot for NOT having something to gush about. they spoke about things like lady gaga's history of fashion or why charity shopping is the best in this way that made it sound bespoke and academic rather than just fangirly. they were always so weirdly ahead of the pulse, this was like 2011 and they predicted the return to early 2000s fashion trends by the 2020s lol!

the way to get from cringe to cool is to be somewhat authorititive and unabashedly self confident, it seems! i mean, i think when people are obviously ashamed of their passion, that's when the cringe vibes are handed out for free i think

What happened for me genuinely was leaving the familiar stilted environment of my shitty high school friends and eventually meeting similarly minded people in college!! Didn't start that way, but once I figured out that I really didn't have to try to fit in to some image anymore - well. Wake-up call. Fellow nerds just unabashedly having fun, dragging me to stuff on campus. Figuring out I could take a weird elective to fill a credit just because I genuinely wanted to learn, and that made me a lot more curious about life and leaning in general? Man, the people I met there changed everything. I owe it to my fellow weirdos who were just - confident, about their interests. Similar to what you said! Especially about things I wasn't into, it was just cool to listen and appreciate. Like I had a ton of friends who were into stuff like Magic the Gathering and video game tourneys and that wasn't my world but it was cool that there were communities for that? Meeting people who had some big community passion project and didn't care who criticized their commitment. And then meeting some of the art students, who I was always jealous of because I'm an artist, but I didn't go to school for it, and it was just so cool talking about their work and hey, art students are strange!! And I loved that! I felt so comfortable with those who were off-beat. Because I really really am, too.

the way to get from cringe to cool is to be somewhat authorititive and unabashedly self confident

This is it!!! Embrace what makes you happy, and passions bring personal joy. Try not to let the opinions of others define you ❤️