#this fucking guy. his life just falls apart around him constantly

[trashrattt]

I totally think Code lyoko should have it's talked about reboot, mostly because

- when it came to Carthage, the most canon explanation from Franz himself, the explanation only lasts about 1 minute and 25 seconds, and nothing else comes of it

Sure, we knew why Xana was created, but like, Franz never really said Xana stopped it as it was his main intended purpose, why Xana was made to begin with, so like, that's a real issue in canon consitering Franz wanted to stop the project but never got to consitering Xana gained autonomy and all

And like, Carthage was kind of hinted at to be a bad thing too, you'd think that could be a real issue in universe

- spent 3 whole seasons building on this one character only not to do much with it at all and give him a really bad rep in universe afterwards

Okay, you know me, I like William an abnormal amount, but with all things considered, he wasn't a character to begin with, neither was a plot device imo

Yeah, he absolutely has no personality, argue with the wall if you need to

So like, yeah, he got posessed, but then what? Sure he was used to try to throw Aelita into the Digital sea, but like, tarantulas could do the same thing with those long ass arms, they could just use them as bats

And you've literally seen megatanks push her closer to the digital sea when she used a energy field as a sheild of sorts, so really, what was the point of him to begin with of other monsters could do the same thing no problem

And after a whole season of dawdling around, the writers rushed the whole "set him free" arc after ignoring it for basically the whole season, like there wasn't any episodes besides cold sweat where the characters actively try to break him free, you'd think there would be a little more give from the characters considering how #depressed Yumi was

(and yes, I know the show says, "I made ___ program" but let us see the FAILURE!!!!)

Even then, when he came back, the characters all decide "fuck this, you ain't shit to me" and dropkick him back to his life without any support, like dude lost months of his life without something he either remembers or blanked out on

- character writing in season four

Okay, this isn't really a reason why, it's more of saying "Why did you make your characters worse, we deserve better"

Because Odd in season four just became an absolutely terrible person, man

Constantly throwing his freinds under the bus just for some scheme he pulled or literally abusing the fact that he knows about Lyoko as a point to say to the others "This is why we're friends!!!1!@1!!" Even though at this point their friendship is downright terrible, like to the point where they just want to get Lyoko dealed with so they can fall apart like a poorly put together cup with scotch taped all over it

Imo nobody seemed to like each other as opposed to season 1 and 2 where they talked casually, like they had an actual friendship going on, not like "so, what's new on Lyoko, I want this shit dealt with today..." they were actual friends who did stuff together and had fun, I miss that :<

Anyways that was a more personal take, but season 4 just leaves a bad taste in my mouth with that rushed ending of theirs

Uhm oops, this was a long rant of what I dislike about the show, I was supposed to make this post simply to tell you guys what I'd propose for a continuation

Here's what I'd do:

Consitering Carthage was an abandoned idea from the depths of season 2, we build on that again

I'm imagining a non-terribly written Evo mixed with the chronicles, like bitch I actually love the idea of Ulrichs dad being tied in with Carthage simply because like, it would make so much sense (absolutely don't pull a chronicles though making EVREYONES mothers under the sun being tied in, that was stupid)

I'm also thinking, the antagonist we have is still a program, but it isn't Xana like in main series

Sure, they're simular, but it's a remnant from Carthage that has the same ideas as Xana, but worse (this is all first draft, but that's like the main idea that could work)

Also, give Will and actual personality this time, not just this "I'm soooooo sad" attitude that any traumatized character has, he has the potential to be COMPLEX!!!!

Kids cartoons nowadays are getting complex so don't say "Oh no they can't, it's a kids cartoon"

Anyways I'm hoping they build off of Carthage because that would be a PERFECT continuation aauaghh

Enjoy (?) My unexpected rant, idk

[mr-e-nigma]

Guillermo del Toro invented a little man. And then he gave that man the complexest of ptsds.

[prettyfastcars]

like animals | Dark!Mob!Lando

Summary: A few months ago, you made the mistake of hooking up with a handsome, mysterious stranger. It was his pretty eyes and boyish face that pulled you in, and it was the wine that gave you that manic confidence it took to hold his hand and let him lead you to his car. One night with him, no strings attached, no more expectations. Just one night, that was the deal. But then he went and got addicted and obsessed. For months now you were constantly having to move to get away from him. After all, he wasn’t just any guy. He was dangerous, and feared, and bad news. So you ran, and he chased. And deep inside, you knew it wouldn’t be long before this cat and mouse game turned into an actual game of hunter and prey. 

Themes: stalking, obsessed!lando, smut, mild degrading kink, fluff?

Your hands shook as you reached for the carefully folded piece of paper on your bed. 

You didn’t put it there. And the mere thought of who might have left it there for you to find was making your whole body shiver. 

No. No. No. 

He couldn’t have found you so easily. You had been so careful this time. After months of living on your friends’ couches, moving back home, moving back to your apartment in the city, living in hotel rooms, you had finally made the choice to come spend some time up on the mountains, in the small cabin your parents owned. 

All that just to get away from him. 

And you had been careful this time. You had made sure to pay for everything in cash, you didn’t tell too many people where you were going to be. And this place was meant to be safe. There was a small town not too far from the cabin. And a cop car often made rounds all over the place. This was supposed to be a safe place. 

But looking at the note, your blood froze. 

‘You’ve got to stop running, babygirl. You know I’ll always find you.’ 

Fuck. 

He was here. 

You looked around, forcing yourself to focus and see if you could hear any noise inside your home. You looked out the window and saw that the sun was setting, it would get dark and cold outside, there were no neighbours around, you were alone up here. 

And he was here. You had nowhere to go. You could always barricade yourself inside the cabin but chances were he was already inside, hence the note. 

This was his favourite game. He left notes all around you for you to find, and each time you found them you ran away. And he chased. 

Damn you for falling for the charms of a stranger that one night. Things in your life would be normal if you hadn’t slept with him that night. But fuck, he was so sweet to you. So charming. So good. His touch was… electric. He was so gentle with you. 

But only when he dropped you home the next morning did you realise who he was. Your friends were waiting for you that morning, worried sick and furious that you would even leave them without saying anything and go home with a guy that dangerous. 

“Dangerous? What do you mean?” You had looked at your girls, suddenly feeling stupid. 

One of them shoved their phone into your hands and you looked at the article on the screen. Headlines and words screaming at you. Mob boss. Arrested. Criminal. Dangerous. Followed by pictures of Lando being either arrested, or released. Cops all around him, like he was more of a celebrity in his expensive suit, curly hair and that damn smirk on his pretty face. In some pictures he even had a bleeding lip, like he got punched, but even then he faced the cameras with a smirk. He even winked in some pictures. 

Shit. 

And ever since, you’d ghosted him. All his messages and calls were ignored, and he wasn’t having it. So he began showing up at places. Your front yard, your gym, your favourite food spots, he was everywhere. He always wanted to talk to you, and you always ran at the first sight of him. 

Then it got bad. He stopped showing up, but his notes did. Which meant that he was finding a way to enter your apartment, your friends’ apartments, your parents’ house, and suddenly nowhere was safe and you refused to put anyone in danger.

Which is why you ended up here, in the middle of nowhere. 

And he followed. 

You crushed the note into a ball and threw it on the ground. That’s when you heard the footsteps. And it sounded like they came from the roof. You panicked and ran out of the room, down the stairs and froze once you reached the front door.

Because there he stood. Smiling at you like this was the most normal scenario ever. His face… It brought back memories of that night. How neither of you could keep your hands to yourselves on the way to his place. How that mouth felt against your skin. How warm and invasive his touch was, making you squirm, and purr under him. 

“There you are, baby. I’ve missed you.” He said, shoving his hands in his pockets. “We’ve got to stop this little game now, okay? Stop being difficult and let me talk to you.” 

And then there was that fucking voice. Gentle, but firm. 

You backed away as he took a step forward. “I’ll call the cops.” Your voice trembled as you spoke. Trying your best to sound confident and failing. 

He scoffed, “Oh don’t bother. I took care of everything. You’re not leaving here without talking to me. I’ve been trying to reach you for months now. This is getting tiring, baby.” 

“What do you want?” 

He shrugged, “Isn’t it obvious? You.” 

You swallowed, worried about whether he’ll let you walk out of here alive. “Look, I didn’t know who you were that night. And I don’t know what you want, but I…” You took a deep breath. “Just leave me alone, please. I won’t tell the cops, I won’t tell anyone. I promise.” 

He frowned, looking genuinely confused for a second. “You think I’m gonna hurt you?” He sighed, bringing his fingers up to his hair, running them through it in frustration, “Can we just talk? Will you just listen to me?” He took another step forward, and you took several back this time. 

“Please,” You begged again, looking around for a quick second, trying to see if there was anything you could use to defend yourself. Then you saw it. One of your father’s hunting knives, mounted on the wall. If you could just… 

Lando sighed again, like he was running out of patience as he looked right at you. His eyes staring into yours. The sun was nearly down all the way now, the cabin was getting darker and darker. The light drizzle outside was consistent. And the knife was not too close, not too far. If you ran towards it… 

“Come on now, baby. You’re a smart girl. Don’t do this.”  

Those words made you frown. Then you realised that he was looking at the knives on the wall as well. Shit. He could tell what you were thinking about. 

Then you did the dumbest, most predictable thing ever. You ran towards the knives, as did he. And he managed to grab you before you could reach for the knives. Pinning you to the wall, and pressing his entire body into yours, he chuckled as he secured your wrists above your head. 

“This is familiar, isn’t it?” He teased, his lips dangerously close to yours, surely referencing that night you two spent together. 

And you’d be lying if you said you weren’t thinking about it too. How good he felt, with his body weight pressing down onto you in his bed. How good he felt, moving in between your legs… fuck. No. You needed to get out of here. 

“Let go.” You murmured, looking into his eyes as you tried to free your hands from his grip but it was impossible. 

Again, he had that look on his face like his patience was running low. “Fine,” He growled, “You want to be difficult? You like our little game too much it seems, huh? Alright then, baby,” He abruptly let go of you and took a step back. He looked at you menacingly. “Go on, run. Isn’t that what you want? Run, then.” He leaned in just a little, staring deep into your eyes and added, “But the moment I catch you, you’re mine. Fair?” 

Think. Think. 

The back door was unlocked. And there was a shortcut to get to the town, but it was through the woods. Maybe if you could… who were you kidding? There was no outrunning him. This had to be a trap. But… if you somehow made it out and into the town to get help, what then? 

Timidly, you asked, “What if you don’t?” 

Lando gave you a smirk that made you a multitude of things. “If I don’t, you’re free to go.” He said, his voice as cold as ice and that borderline unhinged look in his eyes. “I’ll leave, and never bother you again.” 

Damn it. It was getting darker out, the woods would be dark, cold, and it would be hard to see but it was such a short way to get to the town. If you’d run for about eight to ten minutes, you could maybe get rid of him forever. 

You looked up at him. He was still smirking, looking relaxed and not at all bothered. Damn him! 

“I’ll give you a headstart.” He said, and this all became a horror movie really quickly. Even more so when he began counting down. “Ten, nine–,” 

You didn’t stand there to listen to the rest, you took off running. Running past him and further into the cabin, all the way to the back door. And you shivered when you heard him laughing behind you, his laughter echoing in the wooden cabin. Followed by his loud footsteps as he chased you. 

You pushed open the back door and took off. It was still drizzling. And the air was cold, but your heart pumped faster than ever, your legs flying to get you out of there. And as sick as it sounds, there was a part of you that knew that he enjoyed this. This was what he wanted. Dirty, animalistic, primal. You would run and hide, he would chase and when he’d catch you – you’d be his little toy. 

The rain was light, but you could feel the fabric of your clothes sticking to your body already. You were just in leggings and a sweater. You squealed as you finally made it into the woods. It was dark there. The sun had set and it would get pitch black the further in you go. 

The forest ground was covered in moss and mud. Your heart pounded as you stopped running for a moment and just listened. 

And there it was. The steady pounding of footsteps closing in. Then you heard him call out, “You’re in so much trouble when I catch you, baby. I tried to make this easy for us but you don’t want that, do you? Huh? You like torturing me, don’t you?” He yelled, and judging by the sound of his voice, he was still far away. “You fucking love making me work for it!” 

The whole thing made your heart race as you tried to put some more distance between you and him. The silence of the woods, the echo of his voice, the rain falling down like in slow motion, the way your clothes stuck to your body like a second skin, the adrenaline in your veins as you ran further away from him. 

And the anticipation of what would happen if he catches you. 

Right then, the memories of that night you spent with him came flooding in. His touch, his mouth, his hands, how he fucked you till you fell asleep in his bed. How he held you till the morning. All the sweet nothings he whispered in your ear, the ones that made your heart flutter. The one that made you come all over his fingers, his mouth, his cock… How he had you moaning and screaming the whole night… fuck. 

You gasped for air and you stopped for a moment. You quickly assessed your body. Your leggings were torn in places, due to being stuck to thorns and other plants. But other than that, you were okay. Come on, just a few more– 

You heard his voice again. And he sounded closer than earlier. 

“I’m not gonna hurt you,” He cooed. “I promise, baby. Just give me a chance. I’ll do anything for you, you know that? I just wanna fucking talk!” He yelled again. 

You took off running again, stopping every now and then to listen and try to gauge where he was. You were completely drenched at this point, running for your life like a madwoman. Trying to get away from your personal psycho villain. 

You tried to step on the patches of moss so he wouldn’t hear you. But you heard his footsteps, running, chasing and weirdly closer to you than earlier. 

“I hear you, baby.” He called out, chuckling like an actual villain. 

You gasped and ran faster… only to trip on a fallen branch and fall. You cursed before getting up, now with leaves and dirt sticking to you. You heard him. He was closer. Closer. You ran faster. Hoping to be able to somehow lose him and make your way out of the woods and– 

Right when you were about to make a sharp turn, Lando grabbed you by the elbow and tackled you to the ground. You both fell on a soft, wet patch of moss. “Caught you.” He growled, straddling your squirming body and pinning your hands above your head. “You did so well, baby. You almost got away.” He leaned down and whispered against your mouth, “Almost. You got so close too.” He trailed his mouth over to your cheek, “But now you’re fucking mine.” 

You were still breathless. Struggling. Hating how much you were thinking about how good it felt to be under him like this the first time. 

He chuckled, looking down at you. “Don’t lie. You liked it when I touched you, didn’t you?” 

You glared at him, the little bit of light allowing you to see how close his devilishly handsome face was to yours. “Fuck you.” 

He smirked. “Oh you liked it.” He leaned in, “When I touched you, when I tasted you…” He trailed off, scoffing, “But you didn’t let me get my fill, baby. And I want you. So fucking bad.” He pressed his body against yours even more. “Can you feel how badly I need you?” 

You gasped, feeling a prominent bulge pressing against your belly. And your mind went straight to filth. 

He laughed at the look on your face. “You remember now? Hmm? Are you wet for me?” He chuckled, “Should I check?” 

Angry and embarrassed, you spoke through gritted teeth, “Is this how you get women? By forcing them to–,” 

He shut you up by squeezing your cheeks with his cold hand, “Force you?” He questioned, and almost sounded offended, “Oh no baby, you’ll beg for it. I’ll make you beg, just like last time.” 

Not wasting a single moment, he grabbed your sweater at the neckline and tore it until your breasts were exposed. Making quick work of your bra, he almost growled again as he leaned down to take your nipple in his mouth, sucking and biting and alternating between the two of them.

You gasped and moaned and squirmed under him. Damn his mouth… 

The light rain didn’t stop. Drops of water constantly dripped on the two of you. You could hear it, the sound of the light rain falling on leaves. The grunts and groans coming from Lando’s mouth, the sound of your coerced moans, the chill in the air. It was all too much. 

Lando’s mouth moved from your breasts and kissed down your drenched torso until he reached your leggings, which he tore as well, diving in and kissing your inner thighs before sliding your underwear to the side and– 

You moaned shamelessly when you felt his warm, wet tongue lick up and down your folds. “Fuck… please,” You gasped. 

He chuckled, his tongue slipped past your folds and teased your entrance, occasionally flicking your throbbing clit mercilessly until you screamed. Your hands immediately gripped his hair and tugged gently at his roots. 

He licked and sucked relentlessly, “Told you you’d beg for it. You taste so good…” He whispered as he ate you out until you whined, throwing your head back and moaning at how good he felt. His warm mouth pressed against your most intimate part, his tongue stroking you. “I’ve missed you, baby. I’ve missed this.” 

He growled when your hips instinctively bucked against his mouth. You whined as the sounds he made reverberated through your entire body, causing goosebumps to erupt all over your body. 

“You think I didn’t try to move on? Hmm? You think I didn’t have girls throw themselves at me,” He spoke in between licks and kisses, “I tried, baby.” He reasoned. “I did. But the other girls, they’re not like you. I don’t want them. I just want you, I want my baby. And I’ve got you now.” He whispered, thrusting his tongue deeper into you. You moaned and whimpered, your body getting warmer and warmer with each touch of his tongue. 

“Please, please, please…” You chanted as you felt your walls tighten around nothing, and you knew you were close. 

You could only moan and whimper as he kept licking deeper into you, your back arching off the cold ground. You felt him quicken his pace and you felt the pressure building up in between your hips until you couldn’t handle it anymore, and you came undone all over his lips, moaning and whimpering. 

He tore the rest of your leggings and underwear off, leaving the ragged bits still around your ankles as his hand found itself around your throat. He parted your legs and settled in between them. You whimpered when you felt him undo his trousers and pull out his cock, leaving it there, just pressing against your folds. 

“Look at me.” He murmured. 

You opened your eyes and there he was, hovering above you. His face was so close you could see your wetness glistening all over his lips. You couldn’t hold back the desperate moan that left your mouth. 

“Look at what you’ve done to me.” He said, acting like this was all your fault. “You’ve turned me into a fucking animal, baby.” He moved his hips just the slightest, letting his cock brush against your clit in a way that made you want to cry out loud. 

“I didn’t do anything,” You argued, glaring at him. 

“Yes you did!” He persisted. “You’ve been messing with my fucking head,” He growled. “Stop fucking running away from me!” He bellowed. And for a second, even the insects around stopped chirping as his voice echoed. “Please stop,” He spoke again, softer this time. “I’ll do anything,” He said, “I’ll get you whatever you want, I’ll buy you anything, I’ll stop following you around just…” He exhaled, his warm breath tickling your cheek, “Just stop running from me.” 

You whimpered when you felt him push his cock into you without wasting a second, stretching you out just like he did that night. “Fuck…” You cried, letting him bury himself deep inside you. 

It felt so dirty, being fucked on the forest floor by a man like him. But you couldn’t lie and say that he didn’t feel fucking good inside you. 

“Poor baby.” He scoffed. “We could’ve sat down and had a nice conversation, then I would have taken you to bed. And we could’ve fucked nice and slow till the morning.” He pulled out and pushed back into you, making you moan even louder. “But no, this is what you wanted. Right? You liked being chased, and you wanted to be fucked like this? Hmm?” He questioned, knowing you weren’t in a headspace to answer him given his hand was around your throat and his cock buried so deep inside of you – he knew your brain was a foggy mess. 

And he was right because all you could so was whine and moan as he began fucking into you hard and fast. There was nothing gentle about it. He was wild like the surroundings, and passionate, animalistic, fucking you like there’s no tomorrow. 

He tightened his grip around your throat as he sped up into you, growling right in your ear, “You remember me now, baby? Huh? You remember this?” He chuckled. “Does it feel as good as the first time?” 

Yes. 

But you wouldn’t tell him that. His ego was already bigger than these woods. Not that you would be able to talk anyway. Not with his warm, clothed body pressing down on you. Something about you being almost completely naked while he was still dressed made the moment all the more filthy. 

You were a moaning mess under him, your hands instinctively finding their way into his hair as he fucked you nice and hard. It was overwhelmingly good, his voice, his weight on top of you, his cock thrusting in and out of you repeatedly… 

He released your throat and placed his hand on your abdomen, pressing down on your front so he can feel himself inside you with each thrust. He stared into your eyes while he sped up into you again. “There I am.” He said, thrusting into your extra hard to prove his point. “Deep inside you, right where I belong.” He smirked when your body squirmed under him.

You must’ve lost your mind. You should be screaming for help, not enjoying being fucked by him. 

“Are you going to come for me, baby?” He asked, surely feeling the shameless way you were clenching around his cock. “Yeah you will, won’t you? You dirty little slut,” He chuckled, “Look at you, you can’t even talk or think straight, can you?” He said, with pride in his voice. “No, you like being fucked in the middle of a dark forest too much.” He scoffed, “Go on then, come all over this cock.” 

He pressed his lips to yours as you came first, his mouth swallowing your moans as you let go and came with a muffled cry. 

He smiled into the kiss, “There we go,” He pulled away just barely, gasping for breath as he fucked you through your orgasm, close to coming himself. “I’m gonna fill you up nicely, baby. You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Hmm?” 

You let out a choked moan as he came inside you, his body collapsing on top of yours as you both caught your breaths. 

But you couldn’t stay for long, the rain wasn’t stopping. 

– 

Lando managed to get you back into the cabin, and you didn’t fight him as he pulled you into the hot shower. You let him peel away the ragged bits of your clothes which remained on your body. You let him pull you close to him under the shower, but only for a moment. Once your brain fog went away, you tried to pull away and get out but he grabbed you and pulled you back in. 

“Don’t fucking fight me on this, you need to warm up.” He muttered, keeping a tight grip on your wrist even though you glared at him.  

“I wouldn’t need warming up if you weren’t such an animal.” You tried to twist your wrist out of his grip, but he only tightened it. 

“I didn’t hear you complaining earlier,” He pouted, like a brat who’s finally got his way. “Guess you were moaning too loud. I must’ve missed it.” 

“Fuck you.” You didn’t mind his body heat along with the hot shower. 

He smirked. “Round two for later baby, we need to get you nice and warm first. I can even make you some tea if you want.” 

“Get away from me, you fucking lunatic.” You said frowning, but made no move to actually get away from him. 

“Just let me help, okay?” He looked at you, water running down his face and chest. His curly hair now drenched. He stepped out for a second, wrapped a towel around his waist, and grabbed a large, fluffy towel. “Come here,” He said, holding the towel open. 

You glared at him even as you stepped closer and let him wrap the towel around you. He pulled you close again, like he was holding a giant burrito. 

“What do you want from me? Truthfully?” You didn’t have anything to give. You didn’t have that kind of money. 

“This.” He said, “This right here.” 

“Why me?” 

He sighed, “Because I have a thing for pretty women who pretend they hate me.”  

“I don’t pretend, i actually–,” 

“Shh. Stop fighting with me.” He cut you off. “Isn’t this nice? Hmm? See how good we are when we don’t fight.” 

“You’re insane.” 

“For you.” 

Ugh. So not just a lunatic, a clingy one.

[lon3rlife]

Why wasn’t I invited?

Rick Sanchez x Fem!Reader

You and some friends go on a trip, but Rick can’t stand to be away from you (Aka Rick being clingy and soft for once)

You’re in your apartment doing some last minute packing that you have been procrastinating on for days. You go through your closet trying to figure out how you’re going to fit a week of clothes into 1 suitcase and a carry on bag. As you throw some clothes onto your bed that you’ll fold later, you turn to see a green portal appear and your boyfriend walking into the room rambling on about something that you’re to busy to even be paying attention to.

“Woah baby it looks like a fucking tornado went through this place. Why the hell are you packing a suitcase? Where are we going?” He asks taking a quick swig out of his flask

“What do you mean we? I’ve been telling you about this trip for weeks.” You say annoyed that he obviously didn’t listen when you were going on about your excitement for your trip. You and some old friends are going to Europe for a week on a girls trip, you are actually pretty excited to get away for a bit and spend some time catching up with people you haven’t seen in years.

“Wait-where are you going? Why wasn’t I invited? Who’s going to be going? How long are you going for? When do you leave?” He spits out a million questions at once

“Did you seriously not listen to me when I was telling you?” You say aggravated as you attempt to fit more clothes into your already full suitcase

“N-no I didn’t, I was doing something important and I didn’t think you would be going without me.” He continues on but you’re to annoyed to deal with him right now.

“Listen I’m leaving tomorrow morning can you at least drive me to the airport?” You ask in a final attempt to resolve this situation.

“Y-yeah of course. Can I spend the night tonight? I mean I haven’t gone two days without seeing you since we met and I don’t know how I’ll be able to sleep without you.”

As you fall asleep you hear Rick mumble something about not wanting you to leave, but you’re too tired to be able to fully make out what it was.

The alarm goes off at 6am sharp. You try to get up but Ricks arms are firmly wrapped around your waist with his face nuzzled into your hair.

“Rick come on the plane leaves in an hour and a half.” You say secretly enjoying this rare moment of affection.

“Five minutes.” He mumbles

“Two”

“Fine”

You lay down closing your eyes for a minute and turn to face him. You give him a quick kiss and pull yourself off of him, and rush to the bathroom to get ready and make sure you have everything.

After some hustling around the apartment to get everything you need Rick sleepily gets out of bed and you guys drive to the airport. As he’s driving you he’s very quiet. You’re not to surprised at his silence due to his anxiety over you leaving but it still worries you a bit.

“Well I’ve really got to go.” You say giving Rick a gentle kiss goodbye as the final call for your plane is announced.

He wraps you in a very firm but gentle hug, resting his chin on your head.

“Im going to miss you.” He says as you walk off

The trip is great. You catch up with people you haven’t seen in years, you get to visit places you’ve always wanted to, you spend way to much money getting souvenirs for Rick and the Smith family, and get time to relax alone as well.

Being in a relationship with Rick is not easy. You guys are constantly on an adventure or working on something new. It’s pretty nice to not have to worry about yours, your boyfriend, or his grandsons life being threatened for once and you have time just to relax and have a bit of fun.

By day 4 of the trip though, you’re pretty exhausted. The constant sightseeing and social interaction is pretty tough, but you’re still having a great time. You go to bed around 8 to catch up on some well needed rest.

You don’t know what time it was, but it was very late. Your friend who you’re sharing a room with is sound asleep on the pull out couch in the room.

Out of the darkness of the room an all to familiar sound of the glowing green portal appeared out of the pitch black of the room.

“Rick what the hell are you doing here???” You whisper scream trying not to wake your sleeping friend up.

“I haven’t been able to sleep without you. Please can I stay here for the night I’ll be out before anyone wakes up and if your friend wakes up I’ll erase her memory no big deal.” He says way too casually.

“Jesus Rick. Okay just tonight, and you have to be up before she wakes up.” You say still disoriented and tired.

As your eyes adjust to the darkness some more and by the faint glow of the moon you can see the sleep deprivation and stress on Rick’s face even more so than usual. The second he gets into the bed he wraps his arms around you he practically melts into you. You feel his muscles relax and his breathing slow. His arms resting on your lower abdomen and he’s asleep almost instantly. You feel a little sad seeing him curled up on you sleeping so peacefully after obviously not being good mentally for the past few days. After a bit of laying down sinking in this moment you end up drifting off.

You awake abruptly just as the sun is about to rise hoping that your friend didn’t wake up, but you open your eyes to find her still passed out on the couch. You turn to face Rick, who is sound asleep lightly snoring with his long arms still wrapped around you.

“Rick you need to get up.” You say in a loud whisper.

“Mhm.” He grunts sleepily

“Seriously Rick you can’t just crash a girls trip unannounced.”

He pulls you closer and you try to figure out a way to get him out of the bed before your friend wakes up.

“How about we go walk down the street, get some breakfast and watch the sunrise?” You say desperately hoping that will get him up

“Okay.” He says finally opening his eyes

You guys head down to the café to get some breakfast and sit out on a park bench to watch the sunrise.

You check your phone to realize you have completely lost track of time and was supposed to meet your friends in the hotel lobby 15 minutes ago.

“Shit Rick I really need to leave. Please take care of yourself I’ll be home in 3 days, and then we can spend as much time together as you want.” You say rushing to get your stuff together

“Orrr I can just meet you tonight?” Rick asks hopefully, with a face you really can’t resist.

“Okay but you need to leave before sunrise.” You say giving him a quick peck on the cheek before hurrying to meet your friends.

[bunnyreaper]

toxic ex boyfriend soap who you still have to work and live alongside after the break up

(18+/nsfw, f!reader, toxic behaviour, smut mentions, dubcon elements)

he's always working underhandedly to get on the same missions as you so you're constantly still around him, as he struggles to adjust to having you missing from such a big part of his life. can't bear the idea of being apart from you even now, as kicking him out of your shared room has already taken a toll, so he likes to be there by your side whenever he can. likes to know he can still be there to keep you safe.

a lot of your old routines are still the same and he encourages them wherever he can--still always sitting beside you so you can fall asleep on his shoulder post-mission. you still give him the last of your food that you can never seem to finish. little things that you'd done for so long that were just so hard to move on from.

he straight up scares off anyone who might make advances on you by telling them you're his (even if you aren't together right now, that doesn't matter to him.) sabotages any attempt you might get at dating, if he sees a tinder notification on your phone you best believe he guilt trips you into uninstalling it, if he doesn't just take the phone and do it himself. if a guy chats you up in the pub, he appears behind you and slips a hand around the back of your neck, just holding and staring until the guy gets the message.

isn't shy at all about asking when you're just gonna give in and take him back. talking about future plans as if you finding your way back to him is just inevitable. he doesn't ask for any of his stuff back, cause he knows it'll be there when he returns. he doesn't return the engagement ring he has waiting for you either--it's just a matter of time until you realise the two of you are meant to be together.

fucks with you on purpose. sneaks into your room at night and sprays his cologne, sends you texts about how he never stops watching the videos he took of you fucking him--he's daring you to tell him to delete them but you never do. he makes sure you still see him wearing the necklace you got him, or that his lockscreen is still a photo of the two of you. clearly hasn't told his family either because his mother still texts you to check in and make sure you're looking after each other. (at least you don't have to lie, as johnny still is always looking after you.)

and of course when he manages to get you into bed, even if you swear it doesn't mean anything, he makes sure to get you addicted to his touch again. makes you cum over and over again until you can do nothing but scream his name, until everyone on base knows you're still johnny's, even if you can admit it to yourself.

[megs-1800]

Breaking Your Own Heart

Notes: This is based on a request from anonymous this took me a while to write so I do apologise for the delay and hope its what you wanted it to be like. Requests are still open.

Summary: Mason breaks up with you due to the stress of moving to Manchester, breaking apart your family and leaving you a single mum to your daughter together. But when Declan gets married and you both are invited, you haven't seen eachother since the break up, will you be able to remain civil? Will there be hope for you both yet?

Pairings: Mason Mount x Reader

Word Count: 8.1K

Warnings: Fluff, Angst and mentions of drug use

It was 4 years ago when Mason and I met, I have travelled down to London to meet my friends at Uni. They decided they wanted to go to a new club that had opened up so we all ended up going. I wasn’t really one for clubbing but I enjoyed spending time with my friends. I was at the bar getting all us a drink when this man started coming up to me making advances I generally wasn’t interested and I was really started to get uncomfortable which I was shocked that he couldn’t see it on my face as my body language was saying it all. Next thing I knew I had an arm around my waist “Hey baby thanks for holding the spot at the bar” I looked at him to say who the hell are you, which he gave me a look back to say just go with it. I quickly replied “No worries baby what am I ordering?”. Which with this the guy who was bothering me at the bar quickly walked away. “Thanks for that, he just wouldn’t get the hint”. I smirked. “No worries I could never turn down a women in need”. You winked. I knew who you were I was a massive football fan but I still wanted to play it cool. “What do you want?” Mason gestured to the bar. “I was just ordering a couple of vodka lemonades for the group”. Which I pointed in the direction my friends were sitting in and realised they have now since gone and another group of people are now sitting in the space. My face dropped “Great they left me again, I am getting so sick of them leaving me to go hook up with some guys for fuck sake”. I go to walk away when suddenly feel a hand on my wrist “So just the one vodka lemonade then is it?”. You give me such a cheeky smile which makes my heart melt, I cannot believe I am stood here talking to Mason Mount. “its fine honestly, I am just going to go. My friends are gone so I will probably just go get a taxi but to my hotel”. Mason’s face falls as if he was disappointed. “You are more than welcome to join my table, I am sure they won’t mind one more” I now suddenly feel massively insecure “Honestly its fine, I know who you are Mason I am sure the last thing you want is to be stuck with me all night when you can have any girl you want in this bar”. You start to walk closer to me which closes the gab between us “and I want to spend the rest of my night with the beautiful girl in front of me, and I want to buy her a drink if she allows it. But honestly you can walk away now and I will wallow in my pity then I will never get to have my chance with you”. Bloody hell I am not sure if it is the amount of alcohol I have already consumed or was that smooth as fuck. I smiled and nodded.

The rest of the night was amazing we were all chatting and laughing away and I hit it off with the boys and their partners, especially Lauren (Declan’s girlfriend) we have been really getting to know eachother. When it was time to go, Mason claimed he didn’t really get much of a time to talk to me and asked for my number. He said “well I did kind of save your life tonight from creepy dude”. I laughed how overdramatic but no offence Mason Mount wanted my number I was defiantly happy to obliged.

We spent time getting to know eachother over text and facetime and before I knew it we were dating. He was the sweetest guy I have ever been with, he was constantly buying me presents and taking me out and we just had the best time together. I knew I wanted to be his after the first date. After about 6 months of officially dating the long distance was getting to us both, you didn’t live far from London but with your work and Mason’s schedule you literally only saw eachother a couple of times a week if that. Mason asked you to move to London which you were really nervous about at first but after some persuading by Mason you agreed.

Living together was a bliss at first, it was amazing living with Mason. It started to get lonely when he was away with training or games but he brought you a chocolate Labrador called Rocco which was great having a puppy in the house to give you some company. Mason always kept you out of the press as well, he always posted you as he wanted to make a point to say he was now taken but never posted your whole face which meant more of a peaceful life for you.

Everything was going well, that was until 2 years ago. Mason was away on an away game, I usually go to support him but I was working on Sunday so it made sense for me to stay home. It was Saturday night and I was checking the score and saw that Chelsea had won, I bet Mason is happy. I sent him a quick praise text “Well done baby! So proud!”. I curled back onto the sofa with Rocco and I looked on TV, it was an advert about pregnancy test and periods being late. It was a weird feeling I couldn’t explain it, I am on the pill so I do not have a period but then I suddenly think back to 3 weeks ago when I had an awful stomach bug and couldn’t keep anything down so the pill must not of been taken and that means I am now not protected for 7 days since then and I can definitely remember me and Mason had sex at least twice during this stage and OMG one of them it was like multiple times in a night due to a drunken haze. My toes curl again just thinking about it. Surely not I thought Surely I cannot be pregnant. I quickly run to the local shop and I pick up a clear blue digital, I need to be 100% sure I don’t want to be worrying about if there is a line or not. I quickly run to the bathroom and its the longest 3 minutes of my life. That’s when it flashes up Pregnant 2-3 weeks. SHIT! What are we going to do?

Mason was amazing as soon as I told him he was the happiest I have ever seen it, there was not even an inch of panic inside him, it was all excitement. He was amazing all throughout the pregnancy always made sure me and the baby were all okay he was my rock. The day we brought Esme home Mason’s family were all waiting to greet you. You were in a complete bubble you have never been happier.

It was hard being a mum, Esme struggled with sleeping and eating when she was first born so I was completely sleep deprived as she was constantly screaming and Mason was constantly out the house with training, or games, or shoots/promotions. It was tough and put a massive strain on you both. You were over an hour away from your family so it was hard not having that support, you leaned on Lauren as Jude was born around the same time so you were both going through the same thing. However you wanted and needed Mason but he was never around.

Things started to get worse when they were discussions of Mason moving from Chelsea, you didn’t want to believe it and you both had massive arguments about this. “WELL ITS MY CAREER WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO! JUST SIT AT HOME WITH YOU ALL DAY Y/N!” You were more emotional than usual since having Esme and you hated screaming with Mason but now you got so much fire in you the fights got so much more confrontational. “WELL JUST LEAVE ME AND ESME THEN MASON! IF YOUR FUCKING CAREER IS MORE IMPORTANT THEN YOUR DAUGHTER”. Mason was so shocked at this which made him more angry “HOW DARE YOU Y/N! YOU KNOW ESME IS MY WORLD WHY DO YOU THINK I AM DOING ALL THIS TO MAKE A GOOD FUTURE FOR HER, FOR US Y/N! FOR OUR FUCKING FAMILY!!”. I can feel the tiredness overwhelming me now, I hate arguing with Mason but sometimes he never sees it from my point of view. “Well Mason just think you are trying to build a future for us by pushing away how does that makes senses baby?”. At that I walk into the other room pick up Esme who is chilling in her play area and walk upstairs. I can feel my tears running down Esme’s check as I am holding her so close. I can here Mason shouting stuff at himself and slamming cupboards downstairs but right now all I want to do is curl up with my baby and forget about all of this bullshit.

About 6 months later, there are now rumours about Mason moving to Manchester United. I didn’t want to believe it. Manchester is miles away and I really do not want to pack up my life again and move further away. Everytime I ask Mason about it he curves away from the questions and has become very distant due to the injuries and all this gossip going around so it feels like we are strangers again. I go to bed alone and wake up and he is already gone it feels like we are not even together anymore.

Mason explained that his parents were coming over this evening which I was fine about, I love Debbie and Tony and they love me like their own and they absolutely love Esme. Me and Mason prepped dinner together before they came over and we even had a quickie in the shower, it was the closest we had been in months, something felt off. We had dinner and was chatting away with Esme in the highchair munching on some pasta, getting more on herself then in her mouth. After we finished dinner Tony turned to Mason “Are we all going to talk about this now?” I looked at Mason confused “talk about what?” Mason nodded and turned to me “Manchester United have approached me, I need to leave Chelsea and they are offering me a deal I cannot really say no to, I just don’t know what to do because I know you are not on board with moving that far away”. I am so shocked, I don’t know what to say how can he seriously be ambushing me with his parents here is he serious. “Well Mason, I gave up my life to move down to London to be with you and now you want me to pack up my life again to move all the way to Manchester? That’s not fair Mase”. I am directly looking at Mason and his head is down. Tony buts into the conversation “Its part of being with a footballer darling, you need to be able to cope with the moving around constantly ask any WAG”. I feel a bit offended that Tony has but in, this is supposed to be a conversation between me and Mason and our daughters future. I am not winning this argument. “This move is massive for me y/n please it would be good for my career, I could really do with your support. Please think about me in this situation and not just yourself”. Fuck you Mount I am thinking my blood is now boiling at this last bit “I am not thinking about myself Mason, I don’t care, I am thinking about our daughters support system which you should too. We have no one in Manchester, you think both sets of parents are miles away. Dec and Lauren is in London with Jude who she spends all her time with, all our friends everything is here Mason. Think about your fucking daughter”  I can feel myself welling up at this point I am defeated “You know what Mase, it looks like you have already made your decision anyway. So you do what you want as usual. Thank you both for coming, please leave your plates in the sink I will sort the washing up out later”. At that I stand up, walk over to Esme and pick her up out of her highchair and walk myself back in our bedroom. Once inside I feel myself break as I sob into my daughter, I cannot believe he has done this to our family.

Months passed and Mason and I didn’t really didn’t speak about that night further, it was really cold between us and Mason signed for Manchester United. I was excited for him but I hated the fact at moving all the way to Manchester. I went with Mason obviously as I wanted my child to have a stable family however it turned out to be even more toxic. Mason became very distant and with the injuries and the hate he was getting from moving it was really getting to him, I was trying to be there for him and to hold our family together but it was just not working. He kept pushing me away and everytime I tried to push it would cause an argument. He hardly spent time with Esme which hurt me more seeing my little girl getting upset because she cannot see her daddy and everytime I speak to Mason about that again you guessed it, it caused an argument.

I have put Esme to sleep and she is all curled up, I have come downstairs and Mason is curled up on the sofa. I sat on the sofa and the tension could be cut with a knife its dead silent with both of us just starting at the TV. “You got something to say?” Mason said in a harsh tone. I looked at him with tired eyes, all we have done is fight since we came to Manchester, its so toxic which we both know. “What do you want me to say Mason, everytime I try and talk to you it has caused an argument and I am getting real tired of arguing”. He turns to look at me and I cannot tell if its anger or sadness in his eyes. “I don’t know y/n, I know I have been distant recently its just so hard with everything at the moment I am struggling to cope and right now I am trying to focus on my career but you keep pushing me to focus on us. You and Esme are my world and always will be but right now maybe we just need time”. I cannot believe I am here this right now. “Are you serious right now Mount?! You dragged me and your daughter all the way up to Manchester to just break up with us? How do you think I feel, I am here all alone all day with Esme, no friends, no family here, then when you get in you never walk talk or spend time with us. You are not the only one getting hate, since Esme is born I am getting it too, and all the cheating rumours going around that you are seen with this and that girl its fucking hard Mason! But I am still here making sure you are okay. And now you just want to throw it all away, like all I have done means nothing to you? All I have done is be supportive of the move even though you know I didn’t want to do this but I never said anything and now what? You just want to leave me really”. At this last part I break I am now in full on tears. “Please don’t cry baby” You wipe my cheek and rest my cheek in your hands “I love you and Esme more then anything in the world just please everything is getting too much for me at the moment, and it will be easier if I can just focus on my career instead of having to focus on my career and us. I will still be here for you and Esme I just need some time please Y/N, please give me that”. At this point I can feel the tears pouring down my face which I cannot hold in anymore. “I cannot believe you Mase, after everything we have been through really you just want to give up. You are saying we are your world, you just don’t love us enough to fight for us I suppose.” I start to stand up and make my way over to the living room exit and turn towards Mason. “Don’t worry Mase, I will start packing now I will make sure we are gone as soon as possible”. As I make my way up to our now used to be shared bedroom I can feel my heart shatter into a hundred pieces.

I moved out after a couple of days and moved myself and Esme back to (your hometown). You stayed with your parents for a couple of days and put some of your stuff in storage. That’s when Mason messaged you and explained that he brought you a flat for you and Esme as he didn’t want his daughter on the streets. I appreciated he did this because I would struggle to rent somewhere on my own and couldn’t live with my parents forever. It will still bitter though, I was once the love of his life but I guess I didn’t mean what I thought I meant to him.

Mason and I broke up 10 months ago now, I read on the news that his injury spell has continued which I bet has killed him. He only has seen Esme a couple of times when Debbie and Tony have had her, he has popped over to see her. He always posts gifts and clothes to the house which I appreciate and will send me money every month which he said is to support her and for the bills which again I always respond explaining that I appreciate. Which he replies saying “Just because I am not in Esme’s life as much as I want, I still want to make sure she has the world. I want to make sure you do not stress trying to provide for her as well as I know you will give her everything you have and you deserve to treat yourself as well ;)”That text made me smile. Me and Mason haven’t seen eachother since the breakup, and we only communicate over text message, we usually keep the chat aimed at Esme which I send him pictures and updates, as soon as the text goes off topic the other person usually doesn’t reply which we are both guilty for. I just wish I knew what he was thinking.

Mason POV

Its been 10 months since y/n and I broke up. I cannot believe I did it, it was the worst mistake of my life. I miss her more then anything else and I miss my baby girl, I miss Esme more than words can say. My injury spell has continued and I have become a shell of myself. I cannot believe I broke up with y/n, she was my rock my everything I hate myself for ending it, she was the only thing that was keeping me positive and now she is gone. I would give anything to be a family again. That’s why I send her money and things for Esme, I don’t want her panicking about providing for her because I know she will always put Esme first, I want you to happy, that’s all I ever wanted.

I received a text message : “Yo Mase I know its been a tough time lately but Lauren wanted to know if you wanted to come round for dinner tonight, we having a couple of other people over too. To celebrate the engagement and all that. I would really appreciate if you came”. I looked at the message and felt my heart sank, I know this would be something you jumped at the opportunity to go to, I know how excited you would be about Dec and Lauren getting married, but now I do not get to enjoy these moments with you anymore. I quickly replied back explaining I would be there and to send me the details about times and all that. I didn’t want to go but I know I had be there for my friend.

When I arrived there was a couple of the other guys are their girlfriends there and a couple of Lauren friends, part of me really wished you were there so I could see you again. Actually no all of me wished you were there, to see those beautiful eyes and that contagious smile would be all I need right now to get me out of the head space I am in. We sit down to eat and I look across the table hoping to see you but you are not there, I can feel my heart ache again. I can hear all the constant chatter across the table but my mind is zoned out all I can think about is you. One of the boys pulls me out of daydream and asks “Hows Esme doing Mason?” I wish I knew I thought but I thought better of it and faked a smile “Yeah she is doing well thanks, you know what its like growing up way to quickly” and made a little giggle which made the whole table copy. The rest of the table continue in conversation as I help Dec and Lauren clear the plates from dinner, we take them into the kitchen. “Congratulations bro” I saw wrapping my arm around Dec shoulders “I cannot believe you two are getting married its going to be one hell of a party” I say winking at Dec. Lauren then buts in “I am marrying the love of my life Mase, its not a party” which she said in a jokish tone which we all laughed at. “How is she doing Lauren?” I instantly regret asking that as soon as I say it but I need to know. Lauren gives me a small smile trying to console me I think. “She is doing well Mase. Esme is incredible she is a really intelligent girl she is walking and talking and her personality is amazing and so confident. She is amazing Mase honestly”. I smiled its so good how hearing my baby girl is striving in life, but that’s not who I meant. “Thank you Lauren but I didn’t mean Esme, hows Y/N/N doing?” Lauren gives me a sympathetic look “I know what you meant Mase. She is doing well now. She really struggled when you broke up, she was struggling to look after herself, don’t get me wrong she always made sure Esme was cared for, but she struggled Mase. She always said loosing you was the hardest thing. Especially with you making her move to Manchester to just break up with her, that was out of order Mase!” Lauren shouts which makes me wince, I was a dick for doing that I still cannot believe I did that to her. “I know Lauren, I thought if we all moved to Manchester it would help. I hate it Lauren I hate what I did and I wish I never ended it and worked harder to keep my family. Believe me if there was anything I could do to get them back I would. I even started messaging her the past couple of days but she is ignoring me. I love her more then anything Lauren honestly, I just want to make sure she is okay and happy. She deserves the world”. Lauren looks down as if she is scared to tell me the next bit What doesn’t she want to tell me? I look her with pleading eyes I need to make sure she is okay. “She is good Mase, actually she is really good. She started seeing this guy a couple of months ago and they started hitting it off. Esme absolutely loves him and it’s the happiest I have seen Y/N in months. She is allowed to be happy Mase, so please just let her have this. You have hurt her enough”. I look down at the floor trying to hold it all together, I can feel a lump in my throat I cannot believe I lost my chance and you have moved on. At that I said my goodbyes and quickly escorting myself out of Declan’s I can feel the lump in my throat as I leave trying to stop myself from breaking. I cannot believe y/n moved on, I don’t blame her. She is an amazing girl I cannot believe I let her go.

I have been a mess since finding out y/n had moved on, and the fact that my daughter loves him too. They are being a family without me, the thought of this breaks me. I know I was the one who ended it but I didn’t want to break up I just needed some time to get my head around everything. I would get on my hands and knees and beg for her back if needed. I needed her back, I am nothing without them both. I need y/n and I need my baby.

More time passes and you become less talkative with me, you even stop sending me updates about Esme. I have to ask for them which you always send me when requested but you used to message me everyday before and now you are keeping the conversation very blunt I am so broken. It comes to week of Declan and Laurens wedding and all I can think about is seeing you. I know that Esme is the flower girl and you are a bridesmaid. I am the best man, this is my chance to apologise. This is my chance to win you back.

Mason POV

I look at myself in the mirror and straighten my tie. “I cannot believe you are getting married mate. Lauren is amazing you are so lucky” I put my arm around him and I can feel my heart ache at the thought of you. “I will go see the girls quickly so I can grab Jude”. Declan nods and I start walking to the other side of the hotel where I know the girls were getting ready. I knock on the door and let out the breath that I didn’t even realise I was holding. As one of the bridesmaids open the door and let me in I smile at Jude and Lauren as I come in. “You look amazing Lauren! Congratulations!!” I hug Lauren being careful not to ruin her dress. “I am here to pick up Jude” I explain which Lauren nods and points over to Jude. Jude is playing with Esme in the corner and that’s when my eyes meet yours. You look absolutely breathtaking. You have a mint green dress which matches my tie and your hair is all curled and up in a bun with a few strands of hair curled around your face. You’re absolutely breathtaking. I can feel my heart beating through my chest. You smile at me and I can feel my whole body heating up. “Hey” I say that’s all I can get out I can feel my palms sweating I do not know why I am so nervous. “You look incredible”  which I can see the small smile on your face as you look down. This is the first time we are seeing eachother in person since the breakup. You give me a small giggle then respond “Right back at you Mount”. My heart melts at hearing her voice again and seeing that small giggle I forgotten how much I miss you. I am suddenly brought out of my trance “daddddddyyyyyyy!!!” I hear as Esme comes running over to me. She has a long puffier dress which is white and has a ribbon round it which is mint green which matches us. I quickly pick her up and gave her the biggest hug, I didn’t realise how tight I was holding her until she asked me to put her down. I slowly lower her and give her the biggest smile which she returns. I quickly see the time and see I need to get back to Declan. I don’t want to leave you though. “I will catch you later? I need to get Jude to Declan” I ask which you do not respond and just give me a small smile and nod.

The wedding was beautiful but I just keep looking at you, it makes me think of what could have been between us if I didn’t fuck it up this could have been our wedding. She looked incredible, you always have been the prettiest women in the room in my eyes. I cannot believe I let you go.

After the wedding the reception went amazing, everyone was in good spirits. Everyone was chatting away over me but I wasn’t listening all I was doing is watching you. I can see the way your lips touch the champagne glass wishing those lips were on mine.

You go to walk outside on the decking and I know this is my chance, so I follow you out. As I come outside I see you speaking to a guy. You are all giddy which I relive the memory of knowing this is what you are like when you are drunk. You walk round the back which I follow but ensure I keep my distance at the same time. You walk over to a guy, he is tall and has a warm cheeky smile and I watch you wrap your drunk arms around him and hold him tight and engage in a deep kiss. The sight of it makes me feel sick. I watch you two interact with eachother, it breaks my heart that’s how we used to be. I suddenly get a hint of a weed then I realise what that guy is smoking is a joint. I watch you two talk for another 10 minutes then watch him finish his smoke and kiss you goodbye and go back inside this is my chance I thought.

I slowly begin walking over to you carefully and quietly as you are on your own I grab your wrist a little so you turn to look at me “he best not be smoking that round my daughter” I know that sounded more harsh then I wanted and I didn’t want to cause an argument but I was shocked at the sight. I see you roll your eyes and let out a little scoff “He doesn’t smoke around Esme and he never really smokes anyway he only did because someone at the wedding offered it to him and they were sharing it. But you know what I do not need to justify anything to you, he is a grown man he can do what he wants but the thought that you would think of me letting drugs be around my daughter fucking really! And yeah Mason hear that she isn’t YOUR daughter she is MY daughter” which you made the empathies on the Your and My. That made my heart break hearing that.

“Is this what you came here for Mason, to just start shit. I really don’t need to hear it Mason. I have spent too much of my life arguing with you and letting you upset me and today isn’t going to be one of them”. I look down as I can see the tears starting to form in your eyes. All I want to do is grab and kiss you to take the pain away but I know I cannot do it.

“I am sorry y/n I never meant to hurt you, I was selfish I never should of moved you all the way to Manchester to just push you away. I just didn’t know how to cope with it. I didn’t want to drag you down with me you deserved all the happiness in the world and I couldn’t offer you that in that moment of time”. At this point I have closed the gap between us and I am holding your hands in mine. I can see the tears running down your face I am not sure if those are tears of sadness or anger right now. Your eyes are totally blank. “Here”  I say passing you a bottle of water “I can see all you have drunken all day is champagne. You hate champagne and you probably going to be on the floor soon so lets make sure you make it home in one piece so please hydrate”. I wink at you, in which you return this with a small smile and mutter a quiet thank you whilst you can a couple of sips. “What are you doing here Mase” In which I laugh at that and make a cocky comment “Well its kind of my best friends wedding” In which you roll your eyes at that comment and I think I here  a small laugh in return but I really couldn’t tell. “I mean what are you doing here Mase, outside with me. Like why have you decided now of all times to come speak to me like do you really need to do this now”. You sound so scared in your voice I know I need to tread carefully.

“I came to say sorry y/n, I am sorry for breaking your heart. You are my world. You both are, you and Esme. My life has been incomplete since you have been gone. I would give anything to go back in time and change what happened and fight harder for us.” At this point my hands are now holding your waist and I have brought you into me. We are eye to eye and I can see the hurt in your eyes as you are trying not to break. You push me away gently, “No Mase, you don’t get to have a couple of drinks and now suddenly you are sorry. What you did Mason, I would of stayed by your side through everything. You gave up, you pushed us away.” I look at her with so much regret. “I know I did, I never wanted to walk away it just all got so much it was so much pressure from me from everywhere. Everyone needed me to be the best footballer, and you needed me to be a family man. I just needed the world to stop spinning for 5 mins for me to get my head around everything. I am sorry, if I could go back in time I would choose you, our family. All I want is you and Esme. I have been a mess without you”. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest this is the moment I have been waiting for.  “The problem is Mase, I can forgive you for breaking my heart, but I can never forgive you for breaking here’s” At this I can see your entire body break, all the hurt you were building up is now coming flooding at your eyes. The memory of breaking both your hearts hurts me, I never wanted any of this.

“We are a happy Mase, both of us. We are a family me, Esme and Daniel. Please just let us be. Getting over you was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I finally found a guy who makes me feel the way you used to make me feel. Please Mase, don’t do this not now please.” I hear you started to control your breathing to stop you from hyperventilating throughout the sentence as you continue to let the tears fall. The way you said the way I used to make you feel shattered my heart, and knowing you now feel this for someone else breaks me also.

“You deserve so much better y/n, much more then what this Daniel can offer you.” I say pleading. “Oh what Mase, do I deserve someone like you! Someone who drags me and his daughter all the way up to Manchester to just break up with them! Do I deserve that Mase?!” You are now shouting and throwing your arms about, it probably wasn’t the best time to have this conversation. “You know what I mean y/n people like him are not good for people like you”. At this point you are now shooting daggers at me across the decking. “People like him, what the hell does that even mean?” You spit out. “He had one joint Mason, he is an adult he is allowed. He doesn’t do it around Esme. He is not a drug addict. What the fuck are you even talking about Mase. Go fuck off!” I can see you are starting to get defensive. “He is not who you think he is Y/n/n. I know I am not your favourite person right now but please just hear me out. He does a lot more drugs then you think and his last relationship ended because he robbed his ex for everything she had, I am assuming for drug debt, and left her in so much debt. I don’t want that to be you please y/n, be smart about this.” Her eyes start to soften I can tell she is in disbelief right now not knowing to believe me or not. “Your lying! How do you even know all of this? Did you like stalk me or something?!” I try to walk forward to comfort you but as I take a step forward you take a step back. “Of course I was looking out for you y/n. As soon as I heard you were dating this Daniel I had to check him out I had to look out for you and Esme. So I asked about him but what I heard wasn’t great, but I knew if I did it over text you wouldn’t listen to me. She is my daughter y/n I deserve to know who you are bringing into in her life”.

“Don’t act like you care about her Mason. You know ‘father of the year!’ tell me what her favourite colour is? Or the last time she cried? Or what her favourite bedtime story is?” At that I look down as we both knew I couldn’t answer these questions. “Exactly Mason you cannot tell me! You know nothing about her, but you know what Daniel can answer every single one of those questions. He is more of a father to Esme then you ever will be so I beg you stop acting like you care about us, because all your care about is yourself Mase. I can’t…. I can’t… I’m…I’m gonna be sick”. I watch as you quickly look around and dart for the bin on the edge of the decking and start throwing up. I knew you shouldn’t of drunk that much champagne you cannot handle it. I quickly run over to you and pull back the few stands of hair that have fallen out of your bun to make sure you do not get sick in your hair and start rubbing your back, giving you reassurance works like ‘its alright’ and ‘that’s it get it all out’.

Once you are done being sick you stand up and drink some more of the water that I gave you earlier. “I cannot do this now Mason. You made your decision, you didn’t want us. Please let us carry on with our lives. Let us be happy please Mason. If you don’t want to do it for me. Do it for that innocent little girl. She loved you and you broke her heart. You weren’t there whilst she cried for you every night. She is finally happy Mase, she deserves that so please let her be happy”. At that I let you walk away as I can feel a tear slip down my cheek. That’s not the way I thought tonight would go but I guess I will just have to let you both be happy, at the end of the day you both deserve that.

The rest of the night was bittersweet, I watched as you danced the night away with that Daniel. You were grinding on him and making out with him on the dance floor. I know you were more drunk then you were earlier, you were always like that once you were drunk you loved making me jealous. I know you were doing it to just wind me up because as you had your back to him as he hold your waist tightly grinding you into him, your eyes were on me the whole time. It hurt so much, but I knew I deserved that. The part that hurt worse is when Esme came to dance with you both, he held her in his arms as he had his arms wrapped around you as you all were dancing. I can tell this time you were not trying to make me jealous you were living in the moment. You looked so happy, like one big happy family. I could feel my heart shatter. I had to walk away from the dance floor. I couldn’t watch it anymore. I have lost you both.

A couple of weeks later, I got home from training. It was a cold wet winter day. I had a hot shower the feeling of the water hitting my skin instantly warming me up felt like ecstasy. It was a later training day today so by the time I have made dinner, I now find myself wrapped up on the sofa trying to stay warm watching shit on TV, and can feel myself yawning as its now getting late. I can feel myself starting to drift off when suddenly the door bell rings which wakes me up. I quickly open the app on my phone to see who is at the door, when I see you slightly wet from the rain, I can see your face is puffy and soaked not sure if that’s from the rain or if you have been crying. You have got Esme wrapped in your arms and I can tell she is completely knock out asleep.

I feel myself running to the door, when I open the door the sight of you melts my heart. I can now tell the reason why your face is so puffy is from crying you look a mess. But a beautiful mess. “I am s..s..s..sorry for coming down, I didn’t know where else to go. My parents are on holiday and I started driving and then I realised I just drove here. I am s..s..s..sorry for disturbing you”. I quickly pull you inside to the warm. “You can put her upstairs. I always kept her room the same you know in case she ever stayed”. You quickly nod and run Esme upstairs, you being here is all I ever wanted. You come downstairs and you look defeated. I offered you a drink which you decline and I direct you to come and sit in the living room.

You plop yourself onto the sofa which I come and sit next to you, placing a hand on your thigh trying to give you some reassurance. “I am sorry for just turning up I just didn’t know where else to go”. I continue to rub your thigh “Don’t apologise I told you I am always here. What’s wrong? Are you okay? Has something happened to Esme?” I say concerned, you now take my hand of your thigh and hold my hands in yours. “You were right, you were right Mase?” I know look at you confused I have no idea what you are talking about. “Daniel turned out to be the guy you said he was. He was in massive drug debts. He took loans out in my names to clear them. I had a drug dealer turn up at my door threatening me and Esme if he didn’t pay this money. I cannot believe he would do this to me”. You start to break, I wrap you in my arms and put you onto my lap as you cry into my chest, I can feel you soaking my t-shirt as you cry.

“So what happened with him, how did you leave it?” I say hopeful, hoping that you would say you have ended it. “The guy turned up at lunchtime, I explained I had no idea what happened and about this money. The guy left but explained the money has to be paid one way or the other. When Daniel got home I confronted him about it and he confessed everything. He owes like £10k worth of debt and he even explained that he was only getting close to me because he knew Esme’s was yours and you would give us child maintenance and support. He just used me to get your money. I just feel so stupid. I kicked him out and explained no one is turning up at my door. I just feel so awful I didn’t know where to go, I just didn’t feel safe in the flat right now.”.

I look at you with so much pity, I always wanted you back but I didn’t want to be right. I didn’t want you hurting this much. “You and Esme can stay here the night if that helps you to be safe. You know I will always keep both of you safe” I can see you smile, I look down at you as you are wrapped in my arms. You look at my lips and before I know you have crashed your lips to me. You turn to straddle me and deepen the kiss. I have waited so long for this kiss. You stop the kiss and look into my eyes still straddling me. “I am sorry, we shouldn’t be doing this. My head is just all over the place at the moment”. I put a strand of hair behind your eyes and cup your face, you are the most beautiful women I have ever met. “I am not complaining. All I have wanted for months is to feel your kiss”. You giggle at that comment. “If me and Esme could stay tonight that would be great but do not want to impose if you have plans”. I can feel my heart begin to beat fast, I have waited so long to have you this close again. “You do not even have to ask, I am so happy to have you both here again”. You start to move off my lap, I begin to look down as I can feel a lump in my throat coming. “Does Esme hate me? The way you spoke about me knowing nothing about her life, does she think I am a rubbish dad, does she hate me?”

This time you close the gap between us and cup my face in your hands, “she loves you more then words can say Mase. I just said what I said to hurt you because I was shocked and hurt at the time. I always speak to you about her, I show her pictures of you and your family always speak about you. She understands you are busy. Don’t get me wrong she misses you, and always asks why her daddy isn’t around but she loves you Mase I promise. She is going to be so happy when she finds out she is going to wake up in her daddy’s house”. That speech makes my heart melt. I stand up which follow my steps and I wrap you up in my arms. “I love you so much y/n, you and Esme are my everything. I love you”. You smile back into my chest and I feel you tightening the grip on my waist. Maybe there is a chance for us. Maybe we can be a family again.

[nonbinary-eddie-munson]

Steve hadn't meant to evesdrop on eddies new band. Really, he was an innocent party here.

Once things had calmed down in the aftermath of Vecna, Steve and Eddie had scrounged up every penny they could -steve even sold his precious beemer so they could have the extra cash- and got the hell out of dodge. Eddie couldn't stay in a town where everyone still looked at him like he was a murderer and Steve loved Eddie too much to keep him trapped in a town that hated him.

They had settled into chicago nicely, far enough away from the hellmouth that was hawkins, indiana that they werent constantly jumping at the sight of their own shadows, but still close enough they could be back in less than a day if shit started going down again.

The metal scene in chicago was just starting to take off, and Eddie quickly fell in with a local band that was in need of a new lead guitar. Steve had yet to meet any of Eddies new band members, his work and class schedules keeping him entirely too busy and exhausted for socializing. All of which led to this moment, Steve hovering awkwardly at the end of the hallway leading backstage as Eddies new bandmates tore him apart.

"Seriously how'd a guy as hard core as Ed end up with a preppy little asshole like that, i mean did you see what he was wearing?" The drummer scoffed

Self-consciously Steve worried at the hem of his black polo, he had stressed over his outfit all evening before they headed out to the venue. Eddie assured him that he looked great telling him he looked "like a sexy little gothed up jock" in his black polo, his tightest jeans and just the barest hint of eyeliner and mascara to make his eyes pop

"I know it must have been slim pickings back in butt fuck nowhere but Ed's got options now. Sure, the guy has a nice ass, but Ed could pull someone who's not gonna ruin our cred by dating a guy who looks like a narc" the bassist added on meanly.

Swallowing past the lump in his throat Steve turned to head back to the bar when Eddies voice stopped him in his tracks.

"People who disrespect my boyfriend dont get to talk about his ass" came Eddies sharp reply "Steve is more metal than all of you dumb fucks combined, and he's the inspiration behind all of the lyrics that are making us so big in the scene right now. If you cant fucking respect my boyfriend, you sure as hell dont deserve to get famous off the songs i wrote about him so im fucking out and im taking my songs with me."

"Ed you cant be fucking serious" the drummer started

"No, fuck you guys! You act all high and mighty but your just as fuckin shallow and small minded as the dumb hicks Steve and I left Indiana to get away from. Good luck finding someone to replace me and my songs before the fest next month" Eddie spat, his footsteps thundering against the concrete floor and around the corner into the hallway, coming up short as soon as he spotted Steve frozen in the hallway shocked at Eddies fierce defence of him.

"Oh sweetheart" Eddie crooned bringing a hand up to cup the side of Steves face his thumb gently swiping away the tears Steve hadnt even realized had begun to fall "I'm sorry you had to hear that baby. Lets go home" Eddie took his hand back from Steves face, wrapping it around his waist and tucking Steve firmly against his side ushering a still dazed Steve down the hall, out of the bar and into the cool night air

"Your didnt have to do that Eds" Steve said quietly, reluctantly pulling away from Eddie now that they were out in the open where anybody could see.

"Of course i did baby. You're the love of my life. You matter more to me than anything else in this world. More than my guitar and metal and dnd. And certainly more than some mouth breathers who wouldnt know what metal is if it got up on stage and took a bite out of a demon bat" Eddie replied with a grin and a wink swooping down to press a quick peck against Steves mouth as he stood in the middle of the sidewalk frozen in shock at Eddies declaration

"Im more important to you than music and dnd?" Steve asked in a quiet awed voice, his heart beating rapidly as if it was trying to physically escape his chest and burrow itself into the flesh of Eddies own ribcage.

"Sure are sweetheart, now why dont you get that sexy ass of yours moving so we can get home and I can show you just how much I mean it" Eddie replied, his voice lowering into a deep gravel that drove Steve crazy, hands reaching out to pull Steve forward a few steps urging him in the directon of the van parked furthur down the street.

Steve stumbled after Eddie, letting the other man lead him, his brain still not fully back online after Eddies bold decleration of love.

Steve didn't believe in any god, but he found himself thanking every god he could think of for bringing Eddie Munson into his life.

[blooming-violets]

Peter's reaction to bumping into an ex 10 years later who now Has a family of her own ?

Hold on, I raise you this, her husband has passed away so she's raising her children as a single mother.

Because now I'm thinking about future step father Peter Parker. I don't think I've ever pictured him in a stepdad role before, raising another guy's children, but now I kind of love it??

He would be such a good stepdad! Probably at this point, he's thinking kids will never happen for him. He's getting older, he's struggled in the dating world, he's feeling like that part of his life was passed by.

So when he stumbles upon her one evening and they end up going out for coffee, suddenly sparks begin to fly. They reconnect like they haven't been apart a single day. Except that he's very aware of the ring on her finger.

And, let's be real, this Peter at this age isn't afraid of getting into an affair with a married woman if she desires it. He's horny and enjoys sex. BUT she hits him with the dead husband line.

And he knows better than anyone what it feels like to lose someone you were so in love with.

They're little lunch dates ends in emotional tears and heart felt conversations and he walks away feel like he really connected with her again.

It's a slow romance.

It's been over five years since her husband passed but she still isn't sure how to do this whole dating thing again. She has needs, too, but her heart is torn. So they start with just sex.

"No feeling attached. Just sex."

Fucking for the sake of fucking. Just two people who have needs that need to be met.

But we all know that won't be where it ends.

Feelings will always come into play. Especially since they were old lovers. Years of passing time need to be caught up on. They aren't the same people they were years before.

Peter falls first. Obviously. He has less to lose with his feelings.

Her feelings are highly complicated. She has a seven and five year old daughter. She was pregnant with her youngest when her husband died.

She's careful about introducing him to the girls at first. She's not someone who drags over any random man she's sleeping with to her kids.

When they've been dating more concretely long enough, he's finally able to properly meet them. The youngest warms to him immediately. She never knew her father and is just happy to have a man in the house to roughhouse with. The seven year old is a little more wary of him. She's overly protective of her mom, watches Peter with a scowl most of the time, stays quiet and reserved like she's constantly trying to size him up.

Peter, of course, doesn't mind. He lost his parents too. He gets it.

He finds out she's really into Pokémon and that's when they first truly bond. He pulls up his Pokémon Go app and they go out hunting for Pokémon around the neighborhood. After that ice breaking, she can't get enough of him.

Within the first year, he's really made a home for himself amongst their family. He loves his girl, adores the kids, and feels a sense of peace and belonging he hasn't in a long time.

After they get married, I could see him adopting the girls officially. But before hand, he visits their father's grave and talks to him, letting him know that he is so thankful to have found his family and that he promises to be the best man to them that he possibly can be. That he can trust Peter to take care of them. That he won't let them down.

And that he loves them more than anything.

[pacifierbby]

~ RED

Summary ~ Mason never thought that you would go with a man like him. He thought you would go with someone who would do everything under your step. He just wishes that was him.

A/N ~ hello lovely's another story that came to my mind it's like catfish and the bottlemen one for mase ❤️ sadly I've been through a toxic relationship twice and honestly the better way to help is put it through to the characters.

Warnings ~ toxic relationships

Word count ~ ?

Pairing ~ mason mount x reader

location? ~ manchester

Taglist | masterlist

~ Does he meet you with heart-shaped balloons Offer you everything and never pull through Does he love what you've done with the place?

Mason never thought you would date a guy like him he thought you would be more for the men who fall at your feet the minute you step in. The men who buy you flowers whenever you are feeling down. The men who buy you red heart-shaped balloons for any specific day, however, Mason had to watch this one man tear your heart apart repeatedly, making stupid excuses for not making dates or hanging around with your close friends .

constantly seeing you in tears on his doorstep, cleaning up the mess he made. constantly giving you all the hugs that you truly need. he sometimes wished that he was the man for you but he didn't have any guts to tell you before the dickhead came along and all he can see is red when your near him. seeing you happy when you are with him makes mason feel in a type of way maybe jealous? Or the fact that his best friend is being treated the way know one should be treated.

but sometimes, the countless conversations that you and Mason have had you never seem to listen to is it because you're scared of what he can do? because Mason has seen the constant toxic texts between you guys. and he does wish he can just be honest and say leave him but he knows that cant exactly happen because like you he's been through it so only what he can do is sit and help you when you most needed it.

Mason was settled in his bed, the darkness surrounding him. The only light is the moon shining through the blinds ever so slightly. His breathing only noise he can hear. His sleeping was just a no-go. Worried about his best friend yet again she was out with a few friends and her boyfriend but with what happened in the past when you went out with him before. and you came running to his house. he knows that it will most likely happen again. tossing and turning from each side of the bed, checking his phone every 2 minutes to see if you messaged him, but with no messages from you, he's starting to get worried wondering if he should phone you but maybe that was a little stupid mason thought she knows if you was in any trouble to just call him and he will be at your feet quicker than he can be. usually you guys will text back and forth when your on a night out with your friends because he knows how much big places and people fucks with your anxiety but maybe your actually enjoying yourself for once in your life even though you are with him.

sighing grabbing his phone from the night stand from across from him checking his notifications with no texts or phone calls from you he diverted his attention to his Instagram pulling up your account seeing nothing posted yes he does feel like a stalker but honestly he cares so much about you and where you are on this earth because hell do anything if you ever get hurt. putting his phone back on the night stand lying on his back looking up to his ceiling.

You was sitting on your table at the back of the night club alone once again sometimes you wonder why you actually come out with your friends because it always ends up with you sitting alone with all their stuff while they go on the dance floor and put their hands on any man that will want them but this time round your boyfriend came and it has been awhile since you both went out with each other but you know deep down he didn't go out for you or even to meet your friends its because his friends was here too and your probably wondering where he was well hes on his friends table not even bothering to come over or even bothering to offer you a drink. Sometimes you do wonder why you still with him but its when he actually acts like a boyfriend but you know deep down its all wrong and hes just holding onto you for no reason at all. just like you are with him but your just holding onto hope that this man will change out of his 15 year old body.

looking down at your phone wondering if you just should ring Mason and ask for a lift and get out of this forsaken club but maybe the poor man is sleeping you have been waking him up recently with either calls or knocking on his door in tears because of this stupid man but you know deep down you do this to yourself. looking back at your boyfriend's table, seeing him not there anymore looking around the club seeing your friends attached to different men. then there he was his arms wrapped around another girl's body jumping up from the table and running towards him "What the fuck" you shouted over the loud music grabbing the girl and shoving her to the side "What?" he said generally confused "are you serious right now im your girlfriend and you do this here in front of my friends are you serious" pushing your hands into his chest making him stumble over a little. the girl walks away back to her friend's table terrified of what she's walked into. " Well, I don't like you anymore. You're annoying. you're always needy. In fact, why don't you go to that man what he called? Mason, you seemed more cosey with him" making you a little shocked at what came out of his mouth got more annoyed at the fact that he brought Mason up "You know what you're a prick anyway I don't know why I stayed with you your just a toxic dickhead whenever I tried to invite you to my friends you always seemed to have 50 reasons on why you don't wanna go and that causes more arguments than none oh and their it is again bringing mason up again. and trying to stop me from hanging around with him because he is a male friend what a low blow I can have friends that are male you know" you bite back you knew you shouldn't bring up an old subject and sink to his level but sometimes unspoken words needed to come out looking back at the so-called man wanting to punch him in the face but you knew that would cause more of a scene than it is right now thankfully the music was a lot higher so everyone in the club couldn't hear your screaming match. 

walking back to your table, grabbing your handbag, not caring about your friends' stuff for once. not bothering to tell your friends what happened or where you we're going walking out of the club and into the dark nights your coat hanging from your shoulders. your bare legs feeling the cold that the night breaths, your ears still ringing from the music within the club but one thing you knew your shoulders that has been weighed down for a while well since you've been dating Ben has felt a lot of weight has been pulled off from them

sighing a little grabbing your phone out of your bag unlocking it seeing the last message mason sent you before you went into the club usually you guys do text back and forth but because you was with Ben you really didn't want any arguments specially near your friends but in the end shit happens and you was thankful that your friends was far away as possible quickly sending Mason a text you awake? not wanting to ring him straight away. Mason responded really quickly, not wanting to text him again, pulling up his contacts, and after the first ring, he picked up. " You okay?" he expressed not giving you a chance to even say your hellos "um something happened is their anyway you can pick me up i know your at training tomorrow but i don't even want to be here anymore" mason quickly shut your rambling up " i'm on my way please stand near any security guards what club you at" mason knew not to ask why you wanted to be picked up he knew you would just tell him when you are ready and to be honest that's why you loved him. looking up at the club sign, " odd fellows," you quickly replied, hearing masons, car keys jingling down the phone, and doors shutting "alright my love, I'll be their find a safe place" mason replied.

deep down you never thought about mason in that way not even when you first met him at your friends house who dated his best friend Ben he was a proper sweetheart then but the more you guys hanged around with each other there was something there between you guys but you honestly didn't know what it could be but quite frankly you was dumb when people gave you signs hence why you ended up meeting Ben. but when you come to think about it how many times mason stopped everything he planned to come get you, how many times he stayed with you when you was upset or needed a hug Mason was always there for you never once saying a bad thing about you. but with constant bad relationships, you just honestly thought that was normal, but when Mason came into your life, you knew it wasn't. and maybe deep down, you did like the man you just really didn't know how to feel or even how to tell Mason. you just wished that people would meet you with heart-shaped balloons. Offer you everything. but you know, and i know that. that happens in stupid love stories books and Disney films. This is real life.

seeings masons urban range rover car slowly pull up.walking towards it opening his passenger door " hello love" his soft voice making you feel instantly at ease again his bed hair a little bit messy " hello" you softly replied hopping into his passenger seat smiling at him a little. Mason made sure that you had your seat belt on before pulling away and driving to his house. Why didn't i look at all the signs before? he was a very attractive man from his blonde streaks in his mousy brown hair to his prickle beard yes you did find that attractive in men looking at mason at the corner of your eye the way he drives you find that attractive but why didn't you even try with mason when you started talking? why didn't your idiot mind show you the signs now instead of two years ago? but sometimes things are for reasons. "You okay?" mason brought you of your deep conversations inside your mind looking at him then the dark roads the street lights lighting it up " yeah, yeah i am" you smiled looking at him once again seeing him smiling did something to your heart.

Pulling into masons drive way. getting out of his car, it has been a while since you been to his house the drive way been updated, and a little much bigger gates kept the house more private away from people looking into his windows and garden. a coded entry near the gate that his family and him only having it a built in letter box underneath the coded box so post can still come to him " come on my love" mason softly spoken grabbing your hand pulling you away from his car when he noticed that you wasn't following behind him leading you into his front door that he already opened when you wasn't concentrating. his warmth instantly radiating off onto you, making you feel instantly warm inside . Mason leading you into his lounge the floor lamp still slowly lit making it a cozy atmosphere "do you want anything to drink" mason asked softly letting go of your hand "um a cup of tea please" you answered slightly upset that he let go of your hand slowly sitting down on the sofa behind you watching mason walk to his kitchen. grabbing the TV remote, turning his TV on.

Mason loved it when you instantly made yourself home. something deep down wishes it was an forever thing but he doesn't want to jeopardize on what you both have looking at you through the open plan connecting his kitchen to the lounge watching you settled on his couch watching the program that you both watch on your Netflix and to be fair hes getting addictive too even though he said that he wasn't really into murder documentaries. Mason knew when you wasn't your self though the smile from your face instantly vanished always constantly messing with the bottom of your jumper and you only do it when your nervous and that will be out of the equation or when your feeling a bit down.

stepping out from the kitchen and into the living room, walking towards where you are sitting on his couch "whats wrong? You haven't been yourself since we came here. You've been more in a daze ?" he asked quietly not wanting to scare you since he knows you was too far into your own mind placing the two cups on the coffee table sitting next to you "we've broken up" you said your tone matching his from before looking at each other "what happened because i know deep down you liked the guy through all his toxicity?" he asked not sure why you actually broken up i mean he is pleased that he heard them words from you because he wasn't sure himself that this day would ever come "he had a girl wrapped around him and i guess that's what made me snap and i said some things that needed to be said tonight which i am proud of myself i never thought that i would even do it but i guess something overpowered me i just wish i did it ages ago" you replied honestly looking at mason then back down at your feet.

deep down, you were happy. Yes, you were upset that it happened the way it did, but something in you was telling you Ben wasn't the one for you it was the man next to you.

while mason was ecstatic that you've broken up with the dickhead he just wished he could change everything go back to when he met you 2 years ago.

Mason was at his friends girlfriends house all just sitting and watching the TV when he heard the front door go looking up from his phone and looking towards the front door seeing you stand their a smile smile upon your face your hair tide up in a pony tail. your brown eyes reflecting the lights in the living room and he instantly fell for you he just wished he told you then showing you what a true meaning of an relationship showing you stuff that no other man did giving you heart shaped balloons when he comes to meet you giving you everything. coming to all your events, but like nearly every man the minuet you gotten into a relationship, he put away everything he actually thought about you and just made sure you were okay in this relationship.

Your soft voice brought him out of his flash back, looking at you, wondering what you asked him. "You okay?" you asked again "yeah yeah I am just thinking about the time when we first met at your friends house" smiling at you softly bringing you into his chest kissing the back of your hair the smell of coconut instantly filling his nose from your shampoo grabbing your hand rubbing the back of your thumb making you feel safe.

"Mason, can I ask you something?" looking up at Mason and then back at your joint hands. "What my love?" "If you dated the wrong person for a while and you didn't know that the person who was your true everything was under your nose all along, what would you do?" Making masons heart jump can he cope with you falling out of his arms once again? Quite frankly he can't " I don't know my love I guess tell them?" Replying back to your question scared of what the outcome of this would be "well mason It's you I liked you and I feel stupid for even figuring it out yes I've just broken up a relationship but he was a dickhead he didn't give me what I wanted and only what he wanted he wasn't my forever but you you are" masons heart jumped grabbing your face softly "what did you say" not quietly believing on what he heard smile covering his face " I like you" you replied back again mimicking the smile mason has.

"I've been waiting for you to say that for awhile because I felt the same the minute you walked through that door you had my heart my love" kissing your cheek then placing kisses against your finger's instantly making you giddy inside the affection that you finally needed you had you was happy that you finally said what came to your mind. "What happens now" you asked looking at mason " well" mason paused "be abit stupid asking now since we both consfesed" making you giggle a little "but let's start this relationship In better way from here and forever" making you nod. "Here and forever". Mason pulling you in your lips connecting to each other your hearts making the exact pattern.

Your heads leaned into one side, both of your eyes shut. Only what you could feel was the softness of masons' lips. Pulling your hand away from masons hand putting it on his cheek strocking it a little both of you pulling away the love between each others eyes showing. You never thought that love would feel this way you never thought mason would be the one for you but stuff happens for a reason.

[goldenlikedayl1ght]

blank space - m. murdock

a/n: uhm... this one is dedicated to my friend arin who doesn't like daredevil but is encouraging me to be more unhinged. i hope you guys enjoy because i had a blast writing this. possible part two in the works, please like and reblog with comments and feedback <3 warnings: i cannot emphasize this enough-- DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT there is so little comfort to all of this hurt. matt is abusive and mean and reader is tortured and quiet and readers dad is an addict and a gambler and also stabbing, cursing, talking about fucking, sub/dom dynamics, nicknames, fem reader, lmk if i missed any! word count: 3.5k summary: Your dad makes your life horrible. Matt can make it worse. paring: dark!matt murdock x reader now playing: blank space (taylor's version) - taylor swift "so it's gonna be forever/or it's gonna go down in flames?/you can tell me when it's over/if the high was worth the pain"

You never meant to get involved with him.

Really, it wasn’t anything you did.

 As usual, it came back around to your father, who had a bad gambling problem, as well as a substance issue, and would often be tempted to gamble big prizes for things like coke or heroin. He would bet money, college funds, heirlooms, your house.

But of course, he couldn’t pay these debts.

Your mom had been gone for quite some time, and you suspect this is where your fathers’ addictions stem from. But you’re trying to just make your way through your adult life. You had gone to a local college, unable to afford much else. Now, you worked in a dingy little office where they constantly abused your work ethic.

Between your grief, his constant betting on your lively hood, and your asshole boss, you felt your bones grow tired. Not the sort of tired that could be fixed by a good night’s sleep. The sort of tired that could be fixed by a new life, not that you had the means for that.

You think your mother would haunt you for the rest of your days if you abandoned your dad.

Friday night came, and you were ready to go home to the small apartment you shared with your father, and drink some wine, and get a nice sleep.

You had been told by your boss that you needed to stay late to translate paper files to the digital system. No, you would not be getting paid overtime.

It was dark by the time you finally left, your feet aching in your heels as you made your way through Hell’s Kitchen, wanting to get home so as not to start crying on the streets of New York.

You don’t make it home.

As you turn the corner by your block, you notice a van creeping up on you. How long had it been following you? If you weren’t so tired, maybe you would know.

But the van pulled up next to you, and you did the only thing you could in this situation. You started to run.

Only, you made it about ten feet before you twisted your ankle with these stupid fucking heels. As you fall, you let out a cry of pain, and before you can think, two men are outside the van. They grab you by the arms and pull you into the van, the whole time you struggle.

Someone puts a black hood over your head and wraps duct tape around your hands. Your ankle is fucking aching.

You aren’t sure how long you drive for, but someone is then pulling you out of the van and drags you along. They give you an opportunity to walk but your ankle hurts to the point where you can’t walk.

They drag you again, and your foot is dragging, and holy shit, you can’t believe that your biggest concern while being kidnapped is how much your ankle hurts.

Eventually, hood on your head still, you are sat in a chair. Your hands are untied, and you want to jump up and fight, but you know your ankle won’t help you here.

They quickly tie your hands back to the chair, with rope this time. Whoever ‘they’ are.

You’re starting to have trouble breathing, because you’re realizing what sort of situation, you’re in right now.

You’ve been kidnapped for something; you have to assume in some way that it’s to get back at your father.

The hood is pulled off your head, and your eyes take a moment to adjust.

The room you’re in is dark, dingy. You know there’s two people behind you, big enough to carry you. You can hear water outside the room, assuming you’re in an abandoned office by the docks. Then, there’s three people in front of you.

One is a man, with long blond hair. He wears a nice suit and is just standing in front of the door. Another is a woman, with even longer blond hair and she also dons rather luxurious apparel. Your dirty work clothes make you look meager next to her.

The last is a man with dark hair. He wears a simple, rather expensive suit, and red glasses.

If you weren’t on the verge of a meltdown, you’d probably realize how hot he is.

Oh, he also holds a knife.

The blond man talks first.

“So. Do you want to start, or should we?”

“What?” Your ankle throbs.

“I guess we should, then.” He hums. “Do you have five grand worth of heroin on you, dear?”

You could throw up.

“I—”

“No, of course you don’t. You and your boyfriend probably used it all.”

What is he talking about? Now, on top of being in pain and panicked, you’re confused.

“The man you live with?” The woman finally speaks. “I assume you two used all the heroin he stole.”

You realize she means your father. You realize that your father stole five grand worth of heroin. What else did he steal?

“What else does he owe?”

“No, darling,” she scoffs, “We ask, you answer.”

“I don’t do heroin.”

“So, how do you know he owes us more?”

“Took a wild fucking guess.” You spit. “Figured you wouldn’t kidnap someone over five grand, figure money is no object.”

The man with the knife steps out of the shadows. Your heartbeat races, and he chuckles. He crouches in front of you.

“You’re a spitfire. I like that. In fact, I love that in a woman, don’t I, Foggy?” He turns his head back slightly.

Foggy answers.

“That you do, man.”

His head turns back to you. But you get the impression by his glasses that he can’t see. So how is he looking right at you?

“If you give us some sort of sass like that again, I’ll stab you and make sure you feel every second of pain.” You whimper, and he laughs again. “Not so cocky anymore, are we, sweetheart?” He stands and goes behind you, his arms landing on the outside of your own, caging you in. He leans down and whispers in your hear, “Is this.. turning you on, sweetheart?”

You don’t answer.

“Answer me.”

“No.”

“Liar.” He whispers back, the knife gracing over your ear. He cuts your ear just enough to make it bleed, and tears slip down your face. He makes his way back to the front of you and crouches again. “I’ll ask you again. How do you know he owes me more?”

“I figured he would, when gamblers start, they don’t stop.”

“Not only did you lie to me again, you also just gave yourself away. Lie to me again and I hurt you worse.”

Your foot that isn’t hurt goes up and kicks him in the face. At least it tries, because his reaction is too quick, and he grabs your ankle.

“Bad, bad girl.” He tuts. He lets go of your leg and picks up your other leg, the one with the bruising, swollen ankle. You start to shake. His hand squeezes the wound and when you yell in pain, he just coos at you. “Aw, does that hurt, sweetheart?”

You’re busy crying.

“Answer me!” He demands. It shakes you to your core. You realize you do not know who you’re dealing with, and you’re even angrier at your father for jeopardizing you like this.

“Yes!” You sob, and this seems to satisfy him. He takes the knife in his other hand and slowly cuts open your stocking, loving the way you’re shaking with fear.

 “Keep moving and you’ll cut yourself.”

You try to calm yourself down, on the verge of a panic attack. The knife grazes your leg, and he starts to focus in on your thigh, twisting the knife around your skin.

“How do you know him?” he asks. And you aren’t sure why you try it. You don’t know how he knows when you lie.

“I’ll find a way to pay you back, just let me go, I promise, I’ll tell you where he is, just—”

Then you feel it.

The knife pierces your thigh and is lodged into your leg. You scream in pain, gripping the arms of the chair. Fuck, it hurts. Your vision blurs, and you’re unsure whether it’s from pain or from your tears.

 He stands up in front of you, ignoring the stares from Karen and Foggy. He knows he might have gone a step too far for someone he’s pretty sure is innocent in all this. But he can’t help himself. He likes hearing you wither in pain, and he likes being the person administering the pain. He has all these things he’s in control of, but at this moment, no one else is in the room. It’s you and him, in a rather intimate moment.

He pats your chin, “C’mon, focus, right here, sweetheart. Tell me the truth and I make the pain go away.” He tells you, breaking through the wall of pain and fear that blocks your ability to think.

“He’s my father!” You finally cry out. It comes out as if you’re yelling in church, screaming to God a confession you can’t bear anymore. The only thing missing is your position on your knees, but being below this man like this is as close to an altar as you can see yourself being. “I know he has a gambling problem, and I know he has a drug problem but that’s it! I don’t know anything else, I just lost the parent roulette, okay?!” Your words come gasped out, in between sobs and when you’re not too distracted with your pain.

He seems to be satisfied with this. He gets back down, closer to the ground. Now he’s the one at the altar, but the devil has no place in a church, only between your thighs. He tilts his head and kisses the inside of your thigh.

“See? Good girls get rewards.” Bad girls get stabbed. He stands up, and with him, he pulls at the knife. Blood gushes as you cry out in pain again, sure he'll leave you to bleed out, to be fed on by rats.

He drops the knife at your feet and adjusts his tie.

“What should we do with her, boss?”

“Go get her father.” He says, “But don’t let her go just yet. I’d like to keep her a while.” You think you’ll be sick. “Knock her out though, we don’t want her knowing where she is.” That’s the last thing before the butt of a gun meets your head.

It’s a nice relief from the pain.  

• • •

You wake up on a bed with silk sheets. It’s almost nice enough for you to forget about the whole situation. Maybe your whole life has been a dream, and really, you’re a rich housewife for a man who loves you deeply and your mom is still alive.

But then you sit up, and your stockings are ripped, and your heels are gone.

A brace wraps around your hurt ankle. A bandage wraps around your thigh. The pain isn’t there anymore, you’re not sure what drugs have been given to you.

The room is rather barren, you realize, with little to no works of art or even photos, and it’s rather dark. It’s also freezing cold, a central air system whirling around you. You wonder, if you’re a prisoner, then why put you in a room like this?

What is happening?

The door opens and immediately you went to defend yourself, though there were no weapons around you.

The man from the night before steps into the room, and he looks... casual. He wears dark jeans and a tee shirt, his glasses discarded. Bandages wrapped around his knuckles.

“Oh, good. You’re awake.” You don’t respond, just stare at him. “I’m Matt.”

You stay quiet.

“You’re not being tortured anymore, honey. If you want, you can lie and be mean now, I don’t bite. Not anymore. Not unless you want me to.”

“I’m Matt.” You repeat, unable to believe it. “You stab me in the leg and kidnap me, and you go as casual as ‘I’m Matt’?” He grins.

“I told you; I love a woman with some fire.” You wonder how many times he’s used that line on people. “Telling them they’re beautiful just doesn’t hit the same way when you’re blind.” He says, going over to a door, and when he opens it, you realize it’s a closet.

“I want nothing to do with you.”

“No?” He turns to you, and smiles. He says your name. How does he know it? “You went to college for Marketing, cute. No siblings. Your mom died a few years ago, after a long battle with cancer. I’m sorry.” This sounds sincere. “You were engaged once, but he cheated on you and is now married to the other woman.” And he goes back to stinging. “Your father, I know all about him. David is an addict and a gambler. Now, addict, I could deal with. Addiction runs deep but it can be managed. It’s the gambling that frustrates me, and Sweetheart, If I’m frustrated, you must be riled up. He gambles everything, I should know. He gambles it to Foggy, who shares it with me.” He hums. He picks clothes out of the closet and heads back to you, “The pants are your size, but the shirt is mine.” He tells you, laying the clothes out in front of you. “Don’t worry about me watching, or anything.” It’s almost enough to make you smile.

You get changed, the challenge of slipping into the slightly lose jeans the hardest part. The bandage fits right in there, but even whatever pain meds have been given to you, aren’t enough.

“So, your father,” You groan, your face in your hands. You get it, your father is awful, and he hates him, but you know that your father is awful, and you know that you hate him. Why must he keep involving you? “I know, sweetheart, you’re in pain, and you hate him, but just stay with me on this.” he says, a cooing tone to his voice. You don’t know why, but you’re compelled to listen to him. “Your father forces you to live in this small apartment, because you’re the only one who works, and he always manages to find your money to gamble away. But it’s not just the money, it’s your electronics, your nice shoes, any pills you have in the house. And really, by doing all this, he is gambling you. Because not only is he risking not being able to pay his debts and someone taking you, but you’re tired. Aching for absolution that will never come. But the worst part is that even though all this stems from his grief around your mom, he gambled her wedding and engagement rings, the one you were always told you’d be proposed with.”

Tears well your eyes.

“Please, stop.”

He sits next to you on the bed, and you don’t have the energy to move away from him. In fact, you lean against him ever so slightly. He must know it too, you figure, since he can tell when you’re lying and when your heartbeat races. He’s warmer than you imagined. He’s a beacon of warmth in this cold, dim room.

He takes something out of his pocket, and then drops it into your hands. It’s a necklace, just a simple chain. Three things hang on it. A silver charm with an ‘M’ on it, and two rings. Your mom’s engagement ring, and her wedding band. You thought you’d never see it again, not after you came home and went to your jewelry box only to find out from your dad that he had lost it in a poker match a few weeks before.

You clutch the necklace in your hands.

“M for Matt?”

“Or Murdock, whatever you’d like.”

“You’re in charge, right? Just how in charge are you?”

“I run everything. There isn’t a corner of this city that I don’t have men in.” So, he’s the kingpin. The boss. Matt Murdock, a man feared by all, gentle to only you. Only for this moment.

“You’re not going to let me go, are you?”

“Bun, I was never going to let you go. But I don’t think you want to leave, either.”

You stay quiet. You can’t run. He made sure of that. Was he always going to stab you? Had he decided that from the moment he heard you whimper or was it your reaction to his pet names that did you in?

His fingers come up to graze your ear gently, but you flinch, since it’s where he had cut you.

“Bunnies are always so sensitive to the ears. Fragile. It’s not like you can hop away. Besides, you need time to heal, and I could take away all the pain. No more mean fathers, no more mean bosses, and no more mean thoughts.” He says gently. “I could put you back together.”

His voice is soft, as if his intentions are as well, but you’re sure he’ll destroy you. He will not put you back together, only break you down, collecting tiny pieces of you for his collection.

You consider it. You would never have to work again. You would never have to do anything again. You would never have to see your father again.

You turn your head, and nod.

“Okay. Okay, I’ll stay.” It wasn’t as if you had a choice in the matter. But nonetheless, He grins, and takes the necklace from you, only to wrap it around your neck, and clasp it on.

Despite the rings being something you had longed for, the ‘M’ alone weighs on you like a boulder.

He tilts your head gently, his fingers brushing against your chin, and you look away, ashamed of what you have done. He grabs your chin and keeps you looking at him. He leans forward and for a moment you just stay, feeling his hot breath against your lips. Tears escape from your eyes and run down your cheeks. He tuts softly and kisses your cheeks where the tears lie.

“Sh, Sh.. It’s okay, sweetheart,” he comforts. His other hand trails down to your thigh, where two of his fingers find the stab wound, and push into it. You whimper in pain, grasping his wrist. He sighs deeply, “Pretty noises.” He hums. “I would never deny you anything, bun. But if you deny me what I ask, it won’t end well for you. Understand?”

You nod, but when you aren’t verbal, he pushes down harder, the bandage and his fingers soaking with blood.

“Tell me. Tell me you understand.”

“I understand, Matt.” You manage to whimper out. He takes his fingers away and kisses your cheek.

“Good. Good job, honey.” He says softly, bringing his fingers up to his mouth and licking your blood off them. “Sweet, sweet girl.”

He leans forward and kisses you, and it’s full of a gentleness you weren’t sure he was capable of. You kiss back, afraid of what he’ll do if you deny him again.

He winds up kissing you to sleep, not mad at you for falling tired as you kiss. You lay with him in these silk sheets, freezing cold as you cuddle into him. He relishes being wanted. You accept that this is love. He feels you shivering and pulls you closer.

His hands slip beneath your shirt, his fingers tickling the bottom of your torso. You whine when he does this, burying your head in the crook of his neck. He laughs, kissing your head.

“It’s alright, sweetheart. I’ll buy you blankets. Blankets, Diamonds, anything you want.” He tells you. You’re tired. You just want to nap. You want him to give you more of the drugs that dull the pain of your thigh, and you want to eat something homemade that you didn’t cook yourself.

You want to give in and remain thoughtless. Just be happy with him since no one is looking for you anyways.

But as you drift off to sleep, feeling his hands crawl along your skin, you begin to plan. You’ll let him think you’re in love with him. You’ll let him love you, fuck you, put you back together. You’ll be his bunny, his arm candy, his toy to dress up and do whatever the fuck he wants. You’ll let him think he owns you.

He’ll know that he does.

And you’ll become close to his friends too. You’ll dress in pretty dresses, and he’ll pretend he’s oblivious to how much everyone wants you.

 And then, when your wounds heal, you’ll run.

You’ll flee the country, you’ll change your name, dye your hair.

But you don’t yet realize how relentless he is. How deeply enamored of you he is. By how determined he is to have you.

Escaping the devil will not be as easy as you think it might, not when he can hear your heartbeat, not when he can smell you, not when he wants you.

And it doesn’t help when he gives you the honor of killing your father.

That’s when you start to fall in love with him.

[ewanmitchellconnoisseur]

Mɪᴛᴄʜᴇʟʟ Esᴛᴀᴛᴇs (Chapter 1) "Mᴏᴠɪɴɢ Iɴ"

EwanMitchell Verse x F!Reader

A/N: Hello! This is the first chapter of my Mitchell Estates Series! This chapter is for introduction so not much going on! //Dividers by@firefly-graphics

Summary: You finally arrive at what will be your new home. You hope this fresh start will be able to bring you some peace and less drama in your life.

Tw: Nothing!

Word Count: 1.8k

Masterlist • Next Chapter → (WIP)

The road feels never-ending. Everything moving outside of the car feels like a blur and you feel as if you're driving in a fishbowl.

Your eyelids feel like they're being weighed down. You've gotten to the point where you've imagined taping them open. Constantly feeling the need to shake your head as you try to stay awake.

You've spent the entire day packing, and loading all your belongings to your new apartment all on 2 hours of sleep. The cost of movers was not an expense you were willing to pay, the truck itself was already putting a dent in your wallet.

"Your destination is on the right."

You turn on your signals and carefully pull into the small building complex.

It wasn't an easy find. A friend of yours luckily knew the person who had just moved out and managed to get in contact with the landlord before they could give the space to anyone else.

It was an old Motel that had been renovated into apartments, though, it still looked like it was a motel.

You pull into a random parking spot near a smaller building that looks to be the office. It feels good to finally put the car in park and unbuckle.

"Fucking finally" You lean your head back on the headrest and close your eyes just for a second. You listen to the sounds of the cars passing by and the music coming from your radio on low. You had work until 2 in the morning, a rare occurrence, they needed help and you needed the money. And it was only natural that when you finally got home at 3 your neighbours were having sex loudly followed by someone being a dick revving their engine outside the building. You ended up falling asleep at 5 but had to be up by 7 to start packing.

As you relax in your car someone comes and knocks on the window. You look out it to see a man standing there with a clipboard. Annoyed, you hold the button to roll down the window.

"Yes?" He eyes you for a moment not saying anything simply looking between his clipboard and you. You notice his eyes go to your chest then your lips.

Fucking creep.

"You're late." He stares at you and then looks down at his watch. "You were supposed to be here 5 minutes ago." He sighs angrily and starts flipping through pages on his clipboard.

"Sorry, there was traffic." You apologize to which he just rolls his eyes.

What the fuck is up his ass?

Technically you were 3 minutes late since you spent 2 minutes taking a breather. Either way, 5 minutes is not that big of a deal.

"Are you going to get out of the car or am I supposed to give you the tour from here?" He chews his gum like one of the cocky guys that come up to you in bars who act as if they're walking around with the biggest dicks on the planet. You sigh and glare at him as you press the button to slowly roll up the window while staring into his soul.

Once it's up you take the keys out of the ignition, grab your bag and step out of your car. It belonged to your dad, it had been all banged up so you had to get it repaired but it was worth it. It was probably the most expensive thing you owned.

You look around now that you're out and fully take in the building. They did a pretty good job at not making it look like a motel the vibrant blue and orange colours of the doors paired with the black finishings as well as the white walls just made it all pop. You could tell the trees were just recently planted and the gardens were actually tended to.

For a moment you had been worried the place your friend found would be a dump considering the side of town it was on and the price of the rent. You were in too much of a desperate situation to come to look at the apartment itself so you had no other choice but

"Any day now..." You look over at the man who is glaring daggers at you. You take in his appearance now that you can see him better. He's wearing a pair of dark blue jeans and a red sweater. You notice that just above the neckline you can catch a glimpse of a tattoo on the side of his neck. He's cute you'd give him that, but the cutest thing about him has to be that nose. Your thoughts grew a little lewd as you thought about riding his face. His nose perfectly nuzzling against your clit.

Why are the hot ones always so fucking rude?

You close your door, locking the car a couple times before following him.

"You're in B3. Thats the second floor, unit 3." He walks over to that office-like building you noticed earlier and leads you inside, holding the door open.

At least he has some fucking manners.

You take a seat across from the desk as he walks around and sits down in front of you while going through the desk drawers. "No loud noises past 11pm, no pets if it's not on your lease, no in-unit laundry machines, no renovations without clearance."

He finally finds what he's looking for. He pulls out a lanyard, attached to it are 2 sets of keys, a laminated pass and a plastic card. The lanyard itself is decorated with the building's name Mitchell Estates and two phone numbers.

"You only get two keys. If you lose them you owe me 30$ for a new one. The pass gets hung up in your car. If I see no pass and no paid ticket I tow the car. The plastic card is your laundry card. The lanyard has my phone number, don't call me, I promise whatever it is I don't care enough to answer. There is also the maintenance number, call him." He speaks with a dead look on his face and no emotion.

He stands up and walks over to the door and holds it open waiting for you to get up and follow him out. You grab your bag stand up and follow him out of the building. He begins leading you over to the actual apartment.

"The spot you're parked in now is empty so you can have it. Over there is the laundry rooms." He points to the left side of the building, you see a boy and a child walk out dragging baskets behind them. "There are garbage shutes on every floor. Recycling is at the back of the buildings. Those vending machines work." You look over to the vending machines and see some guy leaning against it while smoking. He gives you a grin before stomping out his cigarette and walking into his unit. You try to keep up with the Landlord but frankly, he's walking so fast like he's trying to get rid of you.

You follow him upstairs below you see someone walk into the complex and look toward you. He's wearing glasses and a burgundy cardigan paired with cargo pants. He notices you but quickly looks away.

"Over here is yours." He walks you over to a unit. As you get to the door he searches for the keys, a man comes up the stairs and goes into the unit next to you. You notice the cases of beer he's carrying and a tattoo of a horse on his bicep.

He finally finds the right key and unlocks the door. "Over there on the counter is a copy of the rental agreement. Sign it and drop it off by tomorrow. Rent is due on the first of every month. I don't make exceptions and I don't care for sob stories. If you can't pay I call the police. I trust we will have no issues?" He eyes you up and down again.

Isn't he just a ray of sunshine ladies and gentlemen?

"No need to worry. I don't plan on causing any problems." He nods his head and turns to leave. "Wait," you call after him and he turns back around with an annoyed look. You put out your hand and introduce yourself. "Your name is?"

He looks down at your hand and then back up at you.

"Ettore." With that, he's out your door slamming it behind him.

An hour later the moving truck arrived. Your friends hopped out and began helping you unload your stuff. Since you couldn't afford it on your own and they needed a truck too, you split the cost.

One of your friends stops to look around quickly before walking back over to the truck.

"Wow. It's actually nice." Boyse blocks the sun from her eyes as she looks up at the building. "And that man up there is hot."

You look to see who she's looking at. You see the man before who lives next to you leaning on the railing while drinking a beer. He takes another sip before turning around and going back into his apartment.

"How...kind...and I wouldn't call it nice. It's...an improvement." Boyse rolled her eyes at Farleigh's statement. "I guess considering how it looked before...I can see the appeal." He lowered and handed down a box from inside the truck.

"For $900 a month. Im just fine with how it looks." When Farleigh told you the price even you were shocked in this day and age you were looking at about $2k for more apartments. "Now come on and help me get these boxes upstairs. Im not paying a late fee for this truck." You grabbed a box.

The three of you spent the next 2 hours unloading the truck and then unpacking your stuff. You didn't have much since you were only renting a bedroom before but luckily you had good friends who would be bringing by furniture to help fill in your new space.

"Fuck that was rough." Farleigh leaned against the wall and fanned himself with his hand.

"You didn't even do anything." Boyse rolled her eyes as she took a swig from her water before putting back on the cap and sitting on the counter. "You spent the entire time talking about fucking Felix and his new boy toy."

"I'm 100% sure that fucker framed me." Farleigh had been boring you and Boyse about his family drama for the whole day. He only came back to see his mother for a day and tell her what happened. "Which reminds me we have to leave if im going to make my flight. I have a party to crash."

He blew a kiss in the air which you pretended to dodge earning you a dramatic heart clutch from him. Boyse laughed and walked over and hugged you.

"At least you're a bit closer to me now." You followed her over to the door. The next-door neighbour walked by Boyse and watched him walk away before turning to you and winking and running off when Farleigh honked the truck. "Bye, babe! Have fun."

You turn around locking the door before eyeing your plain and empty apartment.

"This is going to take some work..."

A/N: This was SUPER short but it was just meant to introduce the story and set the scene. Hopefully, you guys can figure out who some characters are just by my vague descriptions but if not do not fear! We will meet them all in due time! (Also it is not easy to describe them when they all look alike 🤣) The next chapter will be longer and better and we will also get to meet Will!

General Taglist: @thought--bubble, @valeskafics Series Taglist: @slytherincursebreaker, @watercolorskyy, @dixie-elocin, @venmondiese, @briefcollectivepersona

[emisprocrastinatingbywriting]

Alone and Forsaken

Chapter 20 Summary:

With the barn fire raging miles beyond Jackson's walls, Joel can't help but contemplate the last few months. Sure, meeting you had made his life livable, but what had his presence done to you? As the night draws to an end, Joel can't find it in himself to stay present and much to his dismay, you notice it immediately. After a difficult conversation is had, will the two of you be able to form a united front. And, how will the rest of Jackson react when two melted corpses are found in a pile of ash just a few miles outside of the gates?

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Comfort, A/B/O Dynamics, Mention of Past Abuse, Joel is in LOVE, Mention of Heat/Rut, FILTHY Smut, Like Truly Filthy.

A/N:

Hey y'all, I hope you guys have had a good start to fall :)

This week, we dive right in where we left off and get to see Joel trying to process the fallout. A bit of angst, as our boy is constantly blaming himself for everything, but it gets sorted out. Cut to some super filthy smut because I love you guys <3 This chapter has a lot of angst coming from other parties, as reader and Joel get put in an incredibly uncomfortable position by the residents of Jackson, but it also has quite a bit of fluff. Thanks for reading!

Chapter 20/20:

Chapter 20: The Bonds We Share

Joel couldn’t remember the last time fall was as cold as that night. The brisk wind blew through the trees in the backyard, leeching any residual warmth from his body as the evening turned to night, and he found himself shivering in the thickest flannel he owned. Not that he minded it much. With the blood still caked underneath his fingernails and the smell of smoke clinging to his hair, his mind was miles away. Memories of the past year whirled around his mind, until he felt like he was somehow in twenty places all at once. 

While Joel’s body was firmly placed in the solace of the quiet home in Jackson, he also hovered over himself as he ripped apart some random child’s room in the cabin he had found almost five years ago. He watched himself sob uncontrollably, violently shaking as he whispered over and over again that the little girls in the picture were not his. A part of him wished that he could reach out to that grief stricken man, to lay a hand on his shoulder and promise that his world would one day be whole, but he knew that he wouldn’t have listened. It would take four years of crushing guilt for him to be in a place where he could accept that kind of comfort and even still, there was only one person’s love that could have saved him. 

Which made his mind wander over to the bank of a swollen river, where Joel had found the person who would alter the course of his life. If there was one moment he was sure he would never forget, it was the first time he saw you. He couldn’t remember the last time he had seen someone so desolate, so in need of someone to take care of them and for some reason, he knew it had to be him. Although he had promised to take you to Tommy in the spring, kindly passing you off to a place that would most likely care for you better than he could, he was ashamed to admit that he was never going to let that happen. From that first night after he carried you home, when he had planted himself at your bedside and allowed your presence to lull him into his first peaceful sleep in years, he was hooked. 

Joel could have died a happy man that night, gladly welcoming the cold embrace of death as he kept watch over a wildly dehydrated and ridiculously filthy omega that stained his sheets with her mouth watering scent. But he didn’t die and every moment that he had with you since that first one was like a reward. From the first time he heard you speak around a mouthful of chocolate, to the first time he had pulled you onto his lap to snuffle at your gland, he had been trying desperately to ignore the obvious. Which, much to his dismay, only became painstakingly clear when you had gone into a heat. As he fucked your swollen pussy into submission, pouring weeks of pent up lust and thinly veiled affection into his thrusts, he realized that he would never escape his fate. No matter what happened in this lifetime, or the next, he would surrender his aching soul to you everytime. 

It wasn’t easy for Joel to come to terms with his feelings, much less his past, but he had finally found someone who was worth the pain of trying. Even when things went to complete shit, when his days seemed to be products of all his worst nightmares, he never once bemoaned the person who had been placed in his path. The fresh scars from the countless battles he had faced to get to you faded to the background, while his eyes could only focus on the woman he loved. The woman who had sparked life in his heart again, stoking the small flame into a blazing fire that could tear through entire cities, revitalizing his soul until he could barely recognize the man that he had been after Ellie died. 

As Joel shivered from the wind, allowing his mind to become untethered from his body, he couldn’t help but wonder if meeting him had been as good of a thing for you as it had been for him. Of course he knew that you had needed assistance when he found you, half starved and exhausted from days of walking aimlessly through the woods, but had Joel been too greedy? Had he mangled your sense of identity, fusing it with his until you were no longer that gentle being that he had found by the river? It was impossible for him to say, as he hadn’t known you before that chance encounter, but it hardly mattered now. The deed was done, the foes had been vanquished, all there was to do now was wait. 

After burning the barn, the two of you had snuck back into Jackson, slipping through the partially blocked off exit you had come from before hurrying home in an attempt to avoid any residents out for a late night stroll. While you had climbed the stairs, giving him a teasing grin as you promised to run a hot bath for you both, Joel had felt himself begin to drift off. 

He felt no regret about what he had done. Just as it had been with the hundreds of people he had killed over the years, Joel was confident that he had done what he must to protect what was his. His only point of contention was you, of how you had unleashed a side of yourself that he had never seen before, a side that he thought resembled himself a bit too much. He had allowed you to be complicit, gleefully watching with a steadily hardening cock as you tortured a man. And now, he couldn’t decide if that made him a bad alpha or a forward thinking one. 

At first, seeing you unleash your more primal self had turned Joel on, effectively shutting off all of his higher thinking as his blood was re-routed to his cock. And even still, he found himself cursing as he tried not to think about how good you looked splattered in blood, writhing against the workbench as he devoured you. But he put that aside, too confused to let himself do anything other than ponder his own part in your bloodlust. 

When that beautiful voice that always made his heart skip a beat finally rang out in the stillness of the night, Joel shoved it all down so that he could fall into your arms free of guilt. He caught you in the doorway, making you giggle as his hulking form knocked you back a few steps, and hugged you like you might slip away if he ever let go. And you let him, planting sweet kisses to the side of his face until you eventually pulled back. 

Joel let you drag him upstairs afterwards, numbly following you through the house as his mind slid back into the past. Images of you dragging him home through a storm came to mind and he remembered how much his hands had stung from the chicken wire he had hastily put up. The sting, much like many of the other ailments his mind and body were prone to, had been soothed by you. Joel smiled as he thought about how you had wrapped his hands in bandages before you frantically rode him into submission, chastising him for leaving you alone during his rut-fueled quest to reinforce the security system. His mind was so clouded by the past that he barely noticed how hot the water was when he slipped into the bath behind you, only coming to when you suddenly turned in his lap and grabbed his face. 

“Hmm - What? Huh?,” Joel slurred, completely out of it.  

“I said; I think if you try singing to him, Ellis might actually look up at you. He loves it when you play guitar for them, so maybe he just needs a little bit of showmanship from his papa,” you jested, giving him a cheeky grin as you did. 

Normally, that would have earned you at least a chuckle from him, but Joel couldn’t find it in himself to fake it. Sure, he was fine with what he had just done to those assholes. In fact, he’d happily do it again, but he couldn’t wrap his mind around you being okay with it. He felt like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop, like at any moment you would break and realize he had poisoned you, vowing to never forgive him before you kicked him to the curb for good. But the longer that didn’t happen, the more uneasy Joel became, until he wasn’t sure what was real anymore. 

“I uh… Yeah, I could try that I guess,” Joel stammered, still half in his head as he tried to form a coherent response. 

The expression on your face changed, the concern filled gaze making him sigh as Joel worked his way back to reality. Sometimes it was annoying how good you were at reading him. Joel grunted as you turned around to straddle him in the steaming waters, trying to ignore the sting that came when you accidentally kneed him in the balls. He gripped your hips, steadying them as you cupped his face and looked deeply into his eyes. And as much as Joel wanted to look away, to hide his conflicting feelings from you until they passed, he couldn’t stop himself from staring back, from letting you pierce through his armor with nothing but a glance. 

“Tell me what’s wrong Joel.” 

It wasn’t a request, it was a demand, and Joel knew he was bound by the bond and all of the other promises he had made to answer it. But for the life of him, he couldn’t figure out where to start. How could he look at the woman he loved, the mother of his children, and ask her whether he had tampered with her moral compass or not? That would lead to nothing but heartache, as he knew you would inevitably think something was wrong with you, when it was clearly him that was the issue. 

Or was he? 

Joel felt like his head was going to explode trying to figure it out by himself. 

“When we met, you had never killed anyone,” Joel stated, letting it hang in the air for a second while he gathered his thoughts. 

“Um, yeah? But what does that have to do with anyth-” 

“Then you met me,” he cut in, making you falter as he pushed through, “And now you’ve killed, how many? Ten? Twenty? A hundred people? Do you even know?” 

You scoffed, “A hundred is a little excessive Joel, don’t be dramatic. And to answer your question; no, I don’t know how many people I’ve killed. Probably more than twenty but less than fifty, but who's to say. To be honest with you, I forget most of them. Why? Why does it matter?” 

Joel didn’t say anything, already fearful that he had opened a nasty can of worms that would forever alter the fabric of your relationship. He wasn’t judging you for the killings, he’d be a fool to be that hypocritical; it was himself who he found fault in. If he had been all the things he wasn’t, if he had protected you better or been smart enough to know where the line should be drawn, perhaps then you wouldn’t have had to stain your hands with so much blood. Perhaps then he wouldn’t feel like he had destroyed someone’s innocence. 

“Sweetheart, did I -,” Joel stopped, clearing his throat as he switched gears, “Did you kill those men because you wanted to, or did you do it because you thought it was something I would want you to do?”

“Jesus fucking Christ Joel, what?!,” you admonished. 

“Because I’m worried that while you were changing me for the better, I was turnin’ ya into someone like me. And I ain’t saying that you’re broken or anything like that, I’m saying that I’m worried that I’ve changed you. Infected ya with all of my shit or something,” he rambled. 

Joel felt all of his fears bubbling up from the darkest corners of himself, forcing his nervous system to start pumping out sharp bursts of adrenaline as the walls caved in around him. He wanted to leap out of the bath and throw himself onto the raging barn fire miles outside of the gates, he wanted to weep into your chest and beg for your forgiveness. He wanted absolution for the sin of harming the one person he had sworn to protect with his life. But none of that came to pass, as he soon felt his head being yanked forward by the scruff of his neck, his face pressed into the spot beneath your ear so that his favorite smell could be pumped straight up his nostrils.  

“Honey,” he whined, trying to pull back so that he could explain himself better but you wouldn’t let him. 

Instead, Joel felt your hands come up to tangle in his curls, keeping him in place as you started to speak. 

“Do you know what it was like to grow up like I did? Can you even begin to understand what sort of shit I had to go through on a daily basis? I was five when the world went to shit Joel, FIVE, and I lost everything before I could even understand what that meant,” you said. 

With his heart breaking for the little girl you had once been, Joel started to draw small circles on your hip bones with one hand, while the other soothed the tension along your shoulder blades. It was meant to keep you grounded as you spoke, but he secretly knew you only humored his touch in moments like these because it soothed him. Although you had come to an understanding about your past, making peace with your mother and everything that had happened to you, that didn’t mean Joel was at peace with it. The thought of you in pain at any stage of life, even when he had yet to make your acquaintance, made him want to scream. And now that the twins were born it was even worse, as he couldn’t help but imagine your mini me, Alba, in the same situation. 

“I had to watch my mom kill my dad and she was…,” you sighed, “She was gone after that, I had nobody. And then there were the QZs, the constant running, my mom meeting Josiah and forcing us to join that group. I never even had a chance to process it and all of that shit just sat with me for years.” 

Joel wasn’t sure what to say so he stayed silent, allowing you the space to speak if that’s what you needed. For another minute you were quiet, continuing to rub the back of his head in a way that thankfully lessened the dull ache behind his eyes, and then you began again. 

“It all festered inside of me, until I was nothing but a big ball of fear and anger, until I didn’t even know who I was anymore. For years I was no better than the infected, just going through the motions day in and day out, but then I met you,” you said reverently, as if finding him was some sort of blessing. 

Joel nodded solemnly, understanding your perspective but unable to reconcile your views with his own. He knew exactly what it was like to be just going through the motions, he had also done so for years before he found you. However, you were overlooking his original point; that perhaps the real blessing would have been if he had saved you from starvation first and then the curse of being involved with someone like him afterwards. 

“That’s exactly what I meant though darling, you met me and then you started to change. Don’t you get it?,” he tried again. 

“No, it’s you that’s not getting it Joel. I spent years being nothing but a fucking victim. The greatest thing I could hope for was to be married off to someone who didn’t beat me. And after that? That I wouldn’t die in childbirth. But then, I met you and everything changed. Suddenly, I found someone who treated me like I was a person. I could actually be something other than a kept woman,” you argued. 

He softened at that, the reminder of what could have been your life making his stomach churn. Although Joel had been cursed with a woeful life as an adult, he could at least say that his formative years had been joyful. While he had spent his childhood swimming in the Texas heat, flirting with his classmates, playing football, and riding horses with his brother, you had spent yours being tormented and abused. Contrary to what any optimists may say, there was no silver lining to an upbringing like that. There was only that deep seeded pain that he knew you hid from the world, one that you put aside each day in order to carry on. The only conciliation Joel could think of was the knowledge that at least your own children would not be subjected to the same cruelty, but even that felt like a cheap reward for such a harsh start in life. 

“Joel, I need you to listen to me when I say this; I have been everything from a scared little girl, to a runaway bride, to a prisoner, to a killer, but the only thing that I have actually enjoyed being is your mate,” you said shakily while hot tears ran down your face and dampened his hair. 

“Oh honey,” he cooed against your heated skin. 

“I’m not done, please let me finish,” you begged, which instantly shut him up.

He felt you take a steadying breath, collecting yourself for a moment so that you could make your point. Joel stayed quiet, trying to soothe you in whatever way he possibly could as he waited. The last thing he wanted to do was to keep you from talking about it, as he knew that you usually preferred to keep the past tucked away. 

“Honestly, this does have a bit to do with you, but it’s not what you think,” you began, pulling back to look Joel in the eye as you continued, “I’m not letting anyone keep me from what makes me happy and what makes me happy is you. I am not a victim anymore, I am a person and I get to decide what I want. And I want you Joel Miller, that’s all there is to it.” 

Joel felt the weight being lifted from his chest, causing him to let out a deep breath that released all of his bunched up muscles. Although he would rather not think of you being tasked with any sort of dirty work, he was soothed by the knowledge that you had at least partaken out of your own volition. The last thing Joel needed was the guilt of ruining yet another person’s life, much less the life of his favorite person. 

“I was the one who suggested going after those guys Joel, and back at the cabin? You weren’t even around to tell me to kill Paul’s men, that was all me. Don’t go taking credit for something I wanted, for something I don’t regret in the slightest. I made my decisions all by myself babe,” you reminded him. 

With that reminder, Joel sighed, gazing up at you as he tried to decipher whether you were telling the truth or not. The look on your face told him that you were and he felt all of his previous worries about shattering someone’s innocence fade away. If this was what you had truly wanted, if killing them had brought you some sort of peace that forgiveness could not, who then was he to judge? Joel had wanted the same thing, regardless of the consequences, which meant he couldn’t chastise you for your own desires. 

“Okay baby, I get it. I just don’t ever want you to do something like that on account of me. What we did it…,” Joel sighed, “It still might come back to bite us in the ass, you know that right? And if it does, I ain’t got a clue what we’ll do.” 

“Maybe it will, maybe it won’t,” you shrugged, “I’m sure they will have questions for us and we already know that the people in town love to talk, but who cares? If it means we can put all of the shit from the past year behind us, isn’t it worth it?” 

“Sure is darling,” he drawled, smiling up at you as he did. 

With that, you leaned down and stole a kiss from Joel’s lips, one that warmed him from the inside out. It was more fleeting than he would have liked it to be and he found himself chasing your lips when you pulled away. A smug grin spread out on your face at his sudden neediness, but he didn’t care about how he looked. 

It was right for you to be smug about Joel’s obsession with you, especially when it was Joel that spent the majority of his day plagued by incessant daydreams about you. If only you knew how often he sat by himself, silenced by his own astonishment as he thought about how lucky he was to have found the love of his life under such peculiar circumstances. His infatuation was nothing short of torment, as he couldn’t go more than a minute without you popping into his brain, but he never wanted it to change. He’d happily slide into insanity if it meant that he could spend just a few more seconds thinking about his mate. 

Joel watched through heavy lids as you reached out and grabbed the shampoo, unable to keep himself from mooning over you as he did. Another cheeky grin was thrown his way when you caught his puppy dog eyes, accompanied by an exaggerated eye roll. It might have been meant as a cue for him to stop gawking, but Joel refused to heed that request, instead preferring to reach out to stop you from squeezing a glob of shampoo into your palm. 

“Let me?,” he whined shamelessly, uncaring of how pathetic he seemed.  

“Sure thing handsome,” you chuckled, “Just watch the eyes this time.”

Joel huffed at that, giving you a pointed look as he snatched the bottle from your grasp. Pink splotches rose to his cheeks and crept down his neck. He tried not to think about the first bath he had taken with you, where he had clumsily yanked on your hair in an attempt to wash it and then nearly drowned you when he tried to rinse the soap out. It had been truly mortifying, but Joel liked to think of himself as a reformed man. Since that blundering first try, he had been sure to pay attention to every aspect of your routines, carefully watching from afar in hopes that he might get a chance to wow you with his second try. Luckily for him, the chance presented itself when the twins began to crowd your womb, the enormous bump leaving you with little option other than to pass the self care duties off to him. 

“Hold up, who was it again that bathed ya when the twins got too big for you to handle it anymore?,” Joel pointed out, making you bite back a grin. 

“Okay fine, you’re very talented Joel,” you said sarcastically.  

“Damn straight,” he grumbled. 

The next few minutes were quiet, the only sounds in the room being the leaky faucet that he had yet to fix and the occasional whispered request from him to shift positions. Joel worked methodically, washing any remaining filth from your hair and slathering it with the conditioner before he moved downwards. He eased all the tension from your body as he worked, smiling when you eventually slumped into him with a sigh. 

“Okay honey, let’s rinse the conditioner out then you should be good to go,” he mumbled as he carefully eased your face away from the crook of his neck. 

“Ugh fine, but only because you’re cute,” you groaned. 

He shook his head, chuckling as he tipped your head back and rinsed the floral scented conditioner out of your hair. Joel smiled at your closed eyes, thankful that he was able to do something so mundane in a world that was anything but normal. Sometimes he couldn’t believe that this was his life. Most of his days were spent changing diapers, rocking cranky pups, and stealing as many kisses as he could from their radiant mother. As far as things go, the situation he found himself in was unique BECAUSE it was so normal. It was almost like he could forget about the horrors that lurked in the shadows beyond the walls and just live like any man should, like he had longed to for decades. 

“Hmm, you’ve gotten better at that baby. Gonna run Jake out of town if you get into the hair business,” you joked. 

Joel snorted, “I like washing YOUR hair darling, I don’t want to spend my days setting old ladies' perms and listening to them complain about their mates.” 

“Oh, but they would love you Joel. I just know they would be running back to the dining hall so they could tell all their friends about the big handsome alpha that did their hair. You’d make a killing,” you teased. 

“Quit it,” he grumbled, unable to hide the way his cheeks reddened at the compliment. 

Another soft smile from you only made it worse, until Joel was sure that his face was nearly as red as a tomato. The way you looked at him was just so affectionate, so full of unconditional love and commitment, that he was entirely bewitched. A spell had been placed on him from the moment he met you, curling around his heart and plucking at its strings until he gladly drowned his former self to be the mate that you needed. Joel was a new man, born again out of love and compassion, and he had you to thank for it. 

“Aw, it’s okay baby, I’m finished for now,” you jested, waggling your eyebrows at him in a way that made him roll his eyes, “Now pass me the shampoo, it’s my turn.” 

He handed you the bottle, hoping that humoring your request would stop the flattery before he died of embarrassment. And it did, kind of. Instead of sweet words, Joel let himself be worshiped in a different way, allowing you to massage the shampoo into his hair with your capable hands, soothing the inflamed muscles at the base of his skull. He sighed when you moved on to his body, his head thumping against the back of the tub as you wrestled with the knots in his shoulders. Undaunted by the heady task, you battled with his muscles until they submitted to your touch, and he couldn’t help the pathetic moan he let out as all the tension drifted away. 

“Fuck honey,” Joel groaned, completely and utterly blissed out. 

“Mmm, you like that?,” you sighed, your voice soft and airy as you did. 

It was a seemingly innocent question, yet Joel couldn’t help the way his mind wandered into more devious territory. His cock kicked up between his legs, twitching against your inner thigh so hard that your gaze snapped downwards. He tried hard to think of something, anything that would stop his hardening cock from ruining the loving moment, but he came up blank. How could Joel possibly keep himself from getting hard when you were naked and massaging his aching muscles, sighing into his ear as you softly asked him if he liked it? Well, the answer was that he couldn’t. He was just a man after all. 

“Well hello there,” you giggled. 

“C’mon baby, don’t tease. I can’t help it. D’ya know what you do to me sweetheart?,” Joel groaned, “Can’t even look at ya like this, you’re so fucking beautiful. You don’t even wanna know half the nasty shit I think about doing to ya every goddamn day, it ain’t right.”

“Is that so? Well, you could always show me,” you answered with a wink. 

Joel reached up and sunk his fingers into your hair, pulling lightly on the strands as he angled your face so that he could crash his lips into yours. A pleased hum slipped from your mouth, allowing him an opening to slip his tongue in and tangle it with yours. With gentle hands, he drew soft circles into the hinge of your jaw, coaxing it open wider so that he could feed you more of him. You tasted faintly of the cigarettes you had helped him smoke back at the barn, along with the slight hint of something sweet, something so indescribably you that drove him wild. 

The world fell away as Joel kissed you, all of his focus on the goddess on top of him who he had devoted his life to. He tried to take it slow, wanting to keep his cool for the time being so that he could show you just how much he cared. Nevertheless, when you began to rock your hips, forcing a harsh growl from him that rumbled from deep within his chest, his patience snapped. 

“Fuck’s sake honey,” Joel panted as he broke away, surprised out how quickly you were riling him up. 

“Maybe we should move this to the bedroom?,” you suggested, continuing the filthy grind that made his head spin. 

He nodded along, willing to do whatever it was you wanted so that he could get himself back between your thighs. Joel watched you stand from the bathtub, skin glistening like it was embedded with diamonds, and felt his heart stutter. Although he was aware of your recent struggles with your body image, the changes had only made him more ravenous. The thin stretch marks along your tummy and hips were so kissable, and his mouth watered at the new layer of plushness that your curves had been endowed with. It drove him crazy that you didn’t see yourself the way he did. While you saw all of the changes that came from birthing two pups as ruinous, all he saw was beauty and a strength that he could never possibly possess. 

“Baby you’re fucking gorgeous, you look like a goddamn angel,” Joel sighed. 

A hand was held out to him and he took it, entranced by your figure as he allowed himself to be dragged from the water. Joel stumbled out of the bathtub, too drunk off the masterpiece in front of him to notice how you laughed at his shaky limbs. He was so out of it that he didn’t even move to grab his towel when you started drying off, standing there with stars in his eyes as he watched you run the thick fabric over every inch of your body. What I would give to be that towel, he thought to himself, trying to keep himself from rushing over there and licking each bead of moisture off with his tongue. By that point, his cock was standing at full attention, throbbing with each heavy thump of his heart until he couldn’t take it anymore. 

Joel was dripping wet, soaking the tiles with each step he made towards you, but he didn’t give a shit. What he needed to do was pour every bit of his mutilated soul into you, to show you just how much you meant to him the only way he knew how. A gasp escaped you when he yanked you forward, capturing your mouth in a searing kiss that had your legs shaking in seconds. He chuckled at your receptiveness, plucking you from the ground so he could wrap your legs around his waist. With his cock nestled in between your folds, he felt all of his previous worries float away, causing him to let out a feral growl as he stomped out of the bathroom. A shriek came from you when he abruptly launched you onto the mattress, which melted into a high pitched squeal as he grabbed your ankles and yanked you towards the edge. 

“Oh sweetheart, you’re a goddamn dream,” he moaned, falling to his knees so he could cover the thickness of your thighs with a smattering of sweet kisses. 

“S-So are y - oh!,” you squeaked, eyes rolling into the back of your head when he suddenly latched onto your pulsing clit. 

Joel wasted no time sucking the bud into his mouth, his hips twitching at the way you pulled at his curls and writhed against the sheets. Slick gushed onto his face and he happily licked it up, teasing your folds with his tongue until you were clutching the sheets. He loved to work you up, to drink up every bit of that precious nectar that leaked out of your hole until you begged him to fuck you. He switched between your clit and your entrance each time he felt you get close, keeping you right on the edge but refusing to let you have it until you screamed. 

Usually, you were putty in Joel’s hands like this, folding to his desires in a way that was oh so sweet. The trust you had in him was something that he would cherish until the end of time. He knew that you had faith in the fact that no matter how frustrating his teasing may be, his only goal was to drown you in an ocean of mind numbing pleasure. Which was why Joel was surprised when he felt you yank his head away from your soaking pussy, forcing a distressed squawk from his throat as you aggressively hauled him up onto the bed. 

“Honey, what the hell are y- oompfh,” he was cut off, shocked by his omega’s strength when he was suddenly thrown onto his back like a ragdoll. 

“Do you think that you can just tease me like that? That I won’t do anything?,” you hissed as you clambered over him. 

The tone you used with him had Joel widening his eyes in surprise, his cock throbbing at your sudden shift in demeanor. He shook his head, knowing that if he tried to speak all that would come out would be a needy whine. Although you didn’t take control often, preferring to let him have his way with you, Joel loved it when you did. So much so that he could never keep it together for very long. Already, he felt his knot beginning to puff up around the base of his cock and he prayed like hell that you would do something before he came untouched. 

“Words Joel,” you chided, bringing back down to earth. 

He moaned, “No baby, I don’t - shit - I don’t think that.” 

“Hmmm… I don’t know if I believe you.”

Before Joel could respond, you were already gone, shimmying down his body to place yourself at eye level with his cock. He wanted to admonish you, to demand that he be the one to tear pleasure from the other until they screamed, but he couldn’t. Not when you were leaning forward, giving him one last devious grin before your tongue drew a lazy line from root to tip. A loud groan burst from his lips, echoing throughout the empty house as you took the hint and sucked more of him into your mouth. 

“Honey, y-you don’t have to, I don’t need you t- oooh fuck,” he gasped, too dazed to do anything other than watch as you took him halfway down your throat. 

A few stray tears sprang from your eyes, wiped up by the pads of Joel’s fingers before he gathered your hair into a makeshift ponytail. He didn’t yank on the strands as he usually would, preferring to respectfully keep them away from your face as you slobbered up and down his throbbing length. Another desperate whimper spilled from his mouth as he locked eyes with you and he could already feel himself racing towards his end, but he tried his best to resist it. Joel wanted, scratch that, he needed to be inside of you first. 

“F-Fucking shit baby, you gotta stop that or m’gonna cum,” he grunted, “Don’t wanna cum like this, please I need - ungh.”

The hold Joel had on your hair tightened and he nearly convulsed at the way you easily swallowed him all the way down. He felt your throat contract once, then twice, dutifully swallowing around him to keep yourself from gagging at the size. A fire stirred in his belly, his cock throbbing wildly in your throat as one of your hands crept down to his balls and rolled them between your capable fingers. Sparks of pleasure ran up and down his spine, the muscles in his abdomen tensing each time your moans vibrated around his length. 

“Please,” Joel panted, his heart pounding as he tried to fend off his incoming release. 

Joel’s cock gave one big twitch, signaling that he was right at the precipice and he cursed himself for not being able to stop it. He let out a frustrated growl, resigning himself to cumming down your throat when he felt his balls begin to draw upwards. But just when he was about to explode, you pulled back, leaving his wet cock to throb angrily against his belly. 

“W-What the fuck? Why?,” Joel stammered, propping himself up on his elbows so he could glare at you. 

“Patience babe, good things come to those who wait… No pun intended,” you giggled, biting the inside of his thigh so hard that he jumped. 

“But I -”

“- What you need right now is to get out of your own head,” you chided, just the sound of your voice almost making him blow his load again, “It’s my turn to take care of you daddy, why don’t you let me? I promise that I’ll make it worth your while.” 

Joel harrumphed but nodded, begrudgingly accepting his fate as you plucked his aching cock from his stomach and swallowed him back down. This time you upped the ante, reaching down to give him a show as you circled your clit and moaned around his length. The vibrations of it were already enough to send him to those pearly gates, but when you pulled your fingers away from your pussy, shoving them into his open mouth so that he could taste your sweet slick, he almost levitated off the bed. 

Muffled whimpers came from him as he sucked at your fingers, his thighs shaking from the tidal wave of pleasure building up inside of him. Joel was torn, it was too much, it wasn’t enough. He needed to feel you as close as he possibly could, to taste your lips as he pounded into your soaked cunt, but he also needed to cum so badly that it hurt. Which was a task that you had made it your mission to thwart, as he soon found himself close to tears when you ruthlessly pulled away once more. 

“Jesus fucking Christ, are you serious? What the fuck are you trying to do to me?,” Joel hissed, frustrated at how the muscles in his lower abdomen burned while precum poured from his pulsating cock. 

“That doesn’t sound like a please,” you tsked, reaching forward to lazily stroke him. 

Joel growled, steadily losing patience as you continued to toy with him. The way you flicked your wrist with every stroke was mean, never once breaking eye contact as you milked him for all he’s worth. It was cruel and unusual punishment, you knew it and so did he, but that didn’t seem to matter to you. 

Although Joel had forty years of sexual experience under his belt, he found that it didn’t mean anything when it came to you. Soon after the first time the two of you had slept together, he remembered how taken aback he had been when he realized you actually cared about his pleasure as much as your own. He was so used to being a giver that he never once entertained the thought of receiving. Nevertheless, the attention you gave to his desires and needs served as yet another reminder of how much you loved him. 

Still, in that moment all Joel could feel was irritation. It didn’t matter that he had been fucking since before you were even alive, you could somehow make him cum at the drop of a hat. He found it incredibly embarrassing that he, a 56 year old man, could lose all of his inhibitions and turn into a quivering mess so easily, but he was completely powerless to your whims. 

“Shi-it, okay! Please baby, please let me cum,” Joel gritted out, willing to wave the white flag if it meant that you’d put him out of his misery. 

Sweat broke out on his forehead as you pretended to entertain the idea, continuing to work him into a frenzy with your hands in ways he would never be able to recreate on his own. Joel whined, thumping back against the bed so that he could tear at his own hair. He was about ready to call the whole thing off, to pull you from between his legs so that he could fuck you into oblivion for teasing him, but your soft voice stopped him. 

“One last time daddy, then I’ll let you have whatever you want,” you promised. 

Joel let out a heartbroken sound but surrendered, clenching his teeth when he felt you take him into your mouth. He hissed when you started to play with his balls, the heavy sack filled with cum and ready to explode down your throat at a moment's notice. But it was when your other hand began to wander that his eyes snapped open, shakily lifting himself onto his elbows so he could peer down just in time to watch as you snuck a finger between his cheeks. He choked when you pulled back to wet your fingers between your legs, lubing them up with slick before you returned to press them into the tight ring of muscle. 

“Sweetheart I - ohmyfuckinggod - ha, shi-it,” Joel gasped, falling back against the bed as your finger brushed up against something that made his vision blur. 

The last time you had done this to him, Joel had been surprised at how good it had felt, but this time was different. This time you had found something inside him that lit his nerve endings up like a Christmas tree. Lifetimes ago, he had read about the joys of having your prostate stimulated by a partner in one of the many copies of Cosmopolitan that his dentist’s office had. It had interested him, but he was too scared to bring it up to even the most loyal of his many booty calls. He couldn’t even find it in himself to try it alone. 

Not once had Joel dipped into that side of his sexuality before you, too used to being in charge of everything to be comfortable enough to let someone see him in a more vulnerable state. But you were different, you were his mate, which meant that he had nothing to be ashamed of. Deep down, he knew that there was a kinkier side of you that wanted to hear his pleasure induced screams just as much as he wanted to hear yours. And based on the way his whole body locked up when your finger started to rub at that devastating spot, as if it was gearing up for the most powerful orgasm of his entire life, you were well on your way to getting what you wanted. 

Sharp zaps of white hot pleasure ping ponged back and forth between his cock and his prostate, making him thrash uncontrollably against the mattress. His ears rang, vision spotted as he raced towards the finish line faster than he ever had. Joel could hear himself babbling, begging through a strained voice as you tore him to pieces, but he had no idea what he was saying. All he knew for sure was that if you didn’t let him cum this time, he was going to start crying. 

“P-Please baby! Fuck, I’ll do anything darling just PLEASE! Wanna cum in that pretty pussy, I don’t care - oh shit - don’t care if s’not safe. Need to shove my knot inside, need to fill you up with me, g-gonna fill you up until it fucking takes again, yes, yes, yes,” Joel rambled, unable to censor his thoughts with how close he was.  

Realistically, Joel knew that it was stupid to do something like that, but he had also known it was stupid thing to do the first time around. He couldn’t help himself, your pussy was too tight and warm, too inviting for a filthy old man like him that dreamed of nothing but burying himself between your thighs. And you were no better, moaning around the cock in your mouth as you squeezed your thighs together at the thought of him cumming inside. Maybe it was stupid, but in that moment Joel couldn’t find it in himself to give a fuck. The muscles in his tummy tightened once more, causing him to release a series of strangled groans while his cock ached for a release. 

Joel tried everything. He first tried bargaining with you, offering to eat you out until the morning came if you brought him over the edge just once. When that didn’t work, the demands came, where he attempted to bark orders at you through his clenched teeth. However, his breathless demands fell on deaf ears, causing him to finally revert back to begging. With his face flushed and sweat sticking to every inch of his skin, Joel was a disaster, thrashing in your hold like a wild animal as he whined. It got to the point that you had to pinch the inside of his thigh two times, a silent reminder for him to cool it before he accidentally bucked you off the mattress. 

“Please, I’ll be good,” Joel whimpered as he reached the edge, staring out at an ocean of pleasure for just a moment before you halted his fall. 

The tears came immediately, dripping unabashedly down his cheeks and staining the sheets below. Joel tried to stop it but the tears just kept coming. His breaths came out shaky and uneven, despite his best attempts to calm himself and he suddenly felt so humiliated that he couldn’t stay level headed. He wanted to keep it cool, to allow you to continue your little game without letting himself shatter into a million pieces. That was what was fair, especially given the fact that he had made you cry from his own teasing too many times to count. But instead of remaining calm, he let out a surprisingly high pitched whimper, which opened the floodgates for the heaving sob that came afterwards. 

“Oh my god, Joel?! Fuck! Are you okay? Did I hurt you?,” you questioned him, the fear evident in your voice. 

Joel couldn’t answer, too busy holding his breath in an attempt to keep his crying to a minimum. He didn’t even know why he was crying. Nothing hurt and despite his frustrations, he had actually enjoyed your teasing, but for some reason he couldn’t stop the flow. He needed something tangible to cut through the vulnerability, something that could ground him a bit so that he could stay in his body. And the second you heard the choked sound he let out when he tried to ask for it, you clambered back into his lap, taking his face in your hands so that you could examine him. Joel shook his head at your concern, unable to explain himself but trying to convey that he was alright, that this would pass. 

“Oh alpha,” you cooed, placing a soft kiss on his forehead that made him cry harder. 

“I-I’m fine,” Joel sniffed, yanking you closer despite the claim. 

Joel wasn’t lying, he was fine, sort of. He had let you take him apart, piece by piece, which left him incredibly vulnerable. That kind of vulnerability only came with a deep trust, one that had placed him in just the right headspace to release all kinds of embarrassing sounds and emotions. He had done the same for you many times, but having it done back to him was as breathtaking as it was overwhelming.

 Never in his life had Joel felt so fragile yet so protected, giving himself over to you so that you could wring out as much pleasure as humanly possible. At any other time in his life, this would not have happened. He wouldn’t have let it. But at that moment, as he laid weeping in bed with his naked mate in his lap, it was time for him to let go. 

“M’not hurt, I liked it baby,” Joel promised with tears still rolling down his face, “Please, I want it, want you so bad. Don’t make me wait honey, I can’t take it no more.” 

“Shh Joel, it’s okay. I’m not gonna make you wait again, I promise. You’ve been so good for me baby,” you soothed, lining yourself up and sinking down on his cock with a heavy sigh. 

The feeling of your warmth enveloping him nearly sent Joel flying, but he managed to hold on. He gripped the fat of your hips so hard that purple marks bloomed beneath his fingertips, moaning wantonly when you started to bounce up and down his length. Every bit of you was on display for him; the leaking tits that bounced with every move, the tummy he loved to leave bite marks all over, the drenched pussy that leaked slick onto his thighs. It was shameless, it was incredibly erotic, and it was driving him crazy. He wasn’t even sure where to look, every bit of you was better than any cheesy porno he had ever seen in his life. 

“Jesus fucking Christ - oo-ooh shit - sweet girl, my girl, mine, mine, mine,” Joel chanted, starting to lift his hips to meet your thrusts. 

“Yours, m’always yours Joel. Fuck, please,” you whined, limbs starting to shake as your pace began to falter.  

That whine flipped a switch in Joel’s brain, stirring up something dark and primal inside of him that could only be satiated by pleasing you. One needy sound from his omega and he was done playing around, the alpha in him rearing up to do his duty regardless of whatever schemes you had thought of. In a blink of an eye, he had thrown you off of him, uncaring of your pathetic whimpers as you bounced against the bed. Before you even had a chance to argue with him, he flipped you onto your stomach, slapping your ass so hard that the sound of it bounced off of the walls. 

A garbled moan came from you while Joel soothed the red mark with his gun calloused hands, causing him to suck his teeth in frustration at how close he was to exploding from just the act of spanking you. It was your fault he was like this, all riled up and no place to go unless he wanted it to end way too quickly. And he made sure you felt his frustration, raining down a flurry of ruthless blows to both sides of your ass that had you squealing into the sheets. 

“Think it’s funny to play with daddy like that?,” he sneered, another heavy crack landing against your upper thigh, “Does my little slut need attention that badly? Can’t go two fucking hours without me fucking that drippy little pussy, hm? Maybe I’ll make you wait for it too, what do you think honey?”

“NO!,” you exclaimed, wiggling against his hold on your hips in frustration. 

Another round of spanks landed against your backside, harsh enough that you cried out and stilled your jerky movements. Joel cooed when he heard a sniffle, leaning forward to place a kiss against your spine as he continued his careful caresses against your reddened cheeks. He knew that the roughness of his hands likely made it more jarring than comforting, but if the slick leaking from between your legs was any indicator; you were enjoying it as much as he was. 

“Oh honey, look at how drenched she is,” Joel chuckled, launching himself forward so that he could place a fleeting peck against your swollen folds, “And so fucking sweet, shame that you were such a bad girl. Woulda loved to give her a proper kiss.” 

That seemed to piss you off, the angry snarl you let out making him chuckle. 

“Come on Joel, I was just having fun. It’s not like you don’t do the same shit to me when you - oh shi-it,” another slap caught you off guard, this one landing right over your twitching core. 

Joel hummed, “You’re right darling, I did enjoy it, but that doesn’t mean that I’m gonna let ya get away with it. Can’t spoil this slutty little pussy of yours too much sweet girl, need you to stay good for me.”

Before you could answer, Joel lifted your hips upwards, smirking at how quickly you arched your back and presented yourself to him. He kissed your shoulder and whispered his thanks, the soft look you gave him over your shoulder causing his heart to flutter. He shook his head, trying to get himself back into the right headspace before he broke and decided he needed to make love rather than fuck the shit out of you. That’s not what you wanted, he could see it in the way you impatiently wiggled your ass back against him, which meant he had to get it together. 

“I don’t think she deserves that just yet,” Joel snipped, halting your desperate movements against his throbbing length. 

With both hands, he pulled your cheeks apart, letting a glob of spit to fall from his mouth onto your asshole. Joel grinned as he watched the tight ring of muscle gleam at him, deciding right then and there that it was time to get payback in every sense of the word. He pressed his index finger against it, getting nothing but a shiver from you until he slid two fingers inside. It was a brutal stretch, he could tell with the way you suddenly tensed and inched away from him, but he refused to allow you to stray too far. Instead, Joel reached down and rubbed circles over your clit, easing the tension from your body with each swipe over the bud. 

“Daddy,” you mewled, more slick coming to stain the bed sheets as his fingers began to thrust in and out of your asshole. 

“That’s it, be a good girl and take my fingers in that perfect little ass. Can’t you hear how soaked that filthy cunt of yours is? She doesn’t even care which hole I fuck, does she? Bet I could just use her to get my cock all nice and wet before I ruin your tight fucking ass every single day. You’d like that, wouldn’t ya darling?,” he rambled. 

The choked whimper you let out was music to Joel’s ears and he wanted nothing more than to hear it again. He simply couldn’t help himself, dripping another wad of spit around his digits so he could slide a third finger in. With one hand providing constant attention to your clit and the other filling your ass, he had no choice but to blanket himself over your trembling figure to keep you jerking away from him and the result was filthy. The heat that gathered between your naked bodies was stifling, a layer of sweat forming over every inch of skin as he fucked his fingers in and out, over and over. Joel leaned into your ear, whispering the most depraved things he could think of until your core began to lock up, squeezing his fingers as you neared your end. 

The kind thing for him to do was to let you cum. However, after remembering your harsh treatment towards him, Joel pulled away just before you could and laughed at the distressed cry you let out. 

“Not so funny now, is it you little shit?,” Joel teased.  

“N-No, it’s not,” you stuttered around heaving breaths. 

He laughed again, rubbing soothing circles into your sides as you came down from your almost orgasm. 

“Well, luckily for you my sweet girl, daddy isn’t quite as mean as you. Which means, all you gotta do is tell me what you want,” Joel promised. 

What Joel proposed was a simple request, but you both knew it was a trap. Sure, he wasn’t a complete liar. He would honor his promise and do whatever it was you wanted if you asked. But that was the issue, the if, as you knew that he was about to make it unnecessarily difficult. Just as you began to speak, he wrenched your cheeks apart with both hands, blowing cool air over your winking holes so that he could watch as you trembled and whined. 

Joel chuckled, “M’waiting darling, anything you could dream of, all ya gotta do is tell daddy.”

A muffled response came from you, one that was spoken so softly that he could barely hear a word of it. All Joel could make out was a quiet please and his own name sandwiched in between the near silent request. With no other choice, he reared up and spanked you once more, forcing a strangled shriek from you that made him squeeze the base of his cock to stave off his own orgasm. 

“Daddy can’t hear a word you’re saying baby, better be a good girl and speak up or else he’ll just have to keep spanking ya,” he chided, sounding almost bored as he let loose another few slaps. 

“Ungh, please, please no more. I-I’ll be good for you daddy, so good, just please,” you tearfully begged, the pain in your voice enough to break his heart. 

Joel made a sympathetic noise, switching gears in an instant at the first sign of your limits being reached. With careful hands, he flipped you onto your back, his eyes raking over your quivering form for any sign of harm that he might have inflicted, but there was none. Instead, all he saw was a glassy eyed omega with bitten lips who stared up at him like he was some sort of sex god. He felt almost bashful at how reverently you gazed upon him, which caused him to forget himself and launch forward, blanketing himself over you so that he could bump his nose against yours. 

“You okay honey? Was I being too rough on ya?,” Joel checked in, fearful that he might have gone overboard with the spanking. 

You shook your wobbly head, “N-No daddy, I liked it. I just want more, want you to…” 

As you trailed off, you looked away from him, embarrassment written all over your face. Joel was dumbfounded, wondering how you could possibly feel too shy to ask him for something when he had been the one that sucked the milk from your breasts as he fucked you just hours before. Not only that, he had just allowed you to finger his asshole, an activity that most alphas his age would shy away from. If Joel was willing to do all of that and still feel comfortable enough to look you in the eye, he couldn’t even imagine what it was that had you so worked up. 

“Y’want me to what? What is it sweet girl? C’mon, you can tell me, there’s no need to be embarrassed. It’s only us in the room right now honey and I’m ain’t gonna judge ya,” Joel promised, coddling you with soft caresses as he did. 

Another beat passed, one that consisted of Joel watching as the cogs in your brain worked themselves into a frenzy. He saw it the second you decided to tell him, sighing in defeat as you decided that the benefits of telling him greatly outweighted the risks. Nevertheless, nothing could have prepared him for what came tumbling out of your mouth. 

“I want you to fuck my ass Joel, right here, right now. Nobody has ever done it before, which I suppose is obvious since I’ve only ever been with you, but I want you to do it.” 

Joel was pretty sure that he had just died and moved on to the next life. This had to be heaven… right? There was no way that you had just asked him to fuck you in the ass, he refused to allow himself to believe it. It had to be his mind playing tricks on him, the damned thing probably finally giving out on him after decades of countless concussions. There was no way that his sweet girl, the woman whose face was branded on the insides of his eyelids, would grant him such a treat. If that had been the case, hell must have frozen over, as there was no way that someone like Joel could be so lucky.  

“C-Could you say that one more time for me sweetheart? My ears ain’t what they used to be, but I could’ve sworn that I just heard you say -”

“That I wanted you to shove your big ass dick into my ass and fuck me,” you finished for him with a determined nod, “Yes, that is correct.” 

Joel groaned a low and pained holy fucking shit, all of his previous worries about cumming too quick subsequently coming back with a vengeance. He couldn’t remember the last time he had been given the chance to do this with a partner and he felt a sort of giddiness bubble up inside of him. Everytime Joel fantasized about anything sexual, it was you he imagined, which meant that he had daydreamed about this more than he would like to admit. However, just like the desires he had been hiding surrounding your breastmilk, he had been too nervous to bring it up. 

Exploring the joys of anal was not something you just brought up at the dinner table. Plus, Joel didn’t think it was appropriate for him to ask you for it outright. He didn’t want to make you feel like you had to do something purely for his own enjoyment, he wanted sex to be fun for you, not like some sort of chore meant for only his pleasure. 

“Baby, are you sure? I mean, there’s nothing I’d love more than to - Chist - I can’t even say it or else m’gonna fucking cum. Ya gotta tell me right now if this is whatcha want before I lose it honey, please,” Joel begged, already beginning to feel his resolve slip as he spread some of your slick to your ass. 

“Please Joel,” you keened, hips already jumping with pleasure as he slid three fingers back into the tight ring of muscle. 

“Okay darling, just be good and let daddy finish getting you ready, m’kay? If we’re gonna do this, we’re gonna do it right,” he soothed, getting a jerky nod from you in response. 

With your heady gaze upon him, Joel lowered himself so that he was face to face with your sopping cunt. He licked a broad stripe up your slit, groaning at the taste as he started to devour you. It was messy as he fucked his tongue in and out of your pussy, keeping it in time with the brutal strokes inside of your ass, and he could tell you loved it. His tongue tickled the inside of your walls, his strong nose bumping against your sensitive clit in a way that had you shaking against the mattress. Fingers slid into his hair, pulling at the curls with abandon as you reached the level of no return, which he took as a sign to slide in a final fourth finger. You gasped, mouth opening and closing like a fish as you panted, whining that you were close as Joel continued to tear pleasure from your core. 

“J-Joel, I’m - ha, ohmygod - m’close. So close, fuck,” you whimpered, heels digging into his back as you bucked up into his mouth.  

Joel didn’t say anything, instead he doubled down on the stronghold he had on your hips, continuing to reach parts of your body that had yet to be discovered as you barreled towards an end. A shrill cry fell from your lips, accompanied by a litany of colorful swears that would make a nun blush. He smiled against your folds as he felt your cunt clench around his tongue, bathing his face with juices as you came. He continued on, wringing out as much pleasure as he could until your body started to shake from overstimulation, and then he finally pulled away. 

“Fuck me Joel,” you laughed breathlessly, trying and failing to calm your racing heart as he carefully pulled his fingers out. 

“Oh, I intend to sweetheart,” Joel joked, reaching down to pump himself a few times before he draped himself over you. 

He slid his length back and forth a few times, collecting as much slick as he could to ease the potential sting of pushing himself inside. Luckily for Joel, you were drenched, meaning that he only had to make a few passes for his dick to be covered. He smoothed it all the way down his length, biting his lip at the feeling and praying he could hold out. When Joel was sufficiently soaked, he lined himself up with your tight hole, trying to control his breathing before he keeled over. But just as he was about to push in, you grabbed his face, forcing his gaze back towards you with shaking hands. 

“Be gentle please,” you whispered, eyes round with fear as you looked at him. 

Joel cooed and dropped down to his elbows, caging you in to quell your rising anxiety. You had once told him that he was like the perfect weighted blanket when he slept on top of you, and he had used that to his advantage ever since. The heat and pressure of Joel’s body overtop of yours seemed to cast off any bad thoughts every time, and he smiled as you soon melted back into the mattress. He brushed the hair from your eyes and placed a smattering of kisses all over your face, ending it with one last big smooch that made you giggle. 

“I’ll be gentle honey, I promise. The last thing I want to do is hurt ya,” he vowed, keeping his eyes on you as he lined up again, “Just tell me if you wanna stop and I will, no questions asked. M’gonna take care of ya sweet girl, I swear.” 

You nodded and bit your lip, giving Joel the green light that he needed to press against the ring of muscle with a bit more insistence. The head of his cock popped in, forcing a stuttered moan from his lips and a needy whine from yours. He stayed like that for a while, waiting for your body to relax until he pushed any further. It took a couple of deep breaths, with Joel whispering soft encouragements and rubbing your clit, but you slowly relaxed enough for him to push forward. He buried his cock inside, stretching you until the halfway mark caused a pained hiss to tumble from your slackened jaw. 

“Y’alright babygirl? Need me to pull out?,” Joel asked through heaving breaths.

Joel prayed that you would refuse so that he could continue to explore the incredible tightness surrounding his length. However, he also wanted you to like it as much as he did. If you hated it, Joel really didn’t see the point of trying. Sex for him was a two person act where the performers complimented one another with each practiced step. It was not an act where one of the performers ruthlessly dominated the other regardless of their own personal desires, it was an art that stemmed from mutual devotion. 

“Mmmm, d-don’t pull out, love it, love your cock, love you. I n-need uh, f-fuck, I need um,” you cut yourself off with a heart broken wail, too cockdrunk to answer any more questions. 

He cooed, “S’alright honey, I gotcha. Daddy knows just what you need, sweet girl.” 

Joel reached down to circle your clit once more, grinning at the way you let out a contented sigh and relaxed. He kept on like that as he worked his way in, rubbing quick little circles into your clit each time he felt you tense up, until he at last felt his hips meet the cradle of your own. With all of his throbbing length locked deep inside, being strangled by the heat that already had him biting at the scars on the insides of cheeks, he knew that he was well on his way towards what would be a devastating orgasm. But he shoved all of that away for now, focusing instead on stroking that throbbing bud at the apex of your thighs until he heard you call out his name. 

“Jooeeel fuck, please do something. I’m so - SHIT - so close already,” you admitted pitifully, lighting a fire under his ass that jump started his thrusts. 

The pace was gentle at first, careful strokes in and out so that Joel could get a feel for where your limits were. But when he felt you pull at the curls on the back of his head, a frustrated cry echoing throughout the room as you tried to weakly fuck yourself down on his length, he knew that he had to up the ante. He buried his face into the crook of your neck, biting down on the gland to quell your cries as he shoved two of his fingers into your neglected pussy. Joel moved his fingers in time with his thrusts, pressing his thumb down against your clit hard so that he could feel you clench around him. It made him hiss and moan, his cock throbbing against your tight walls as he drove into both of your holes even harder. 

“Yeah baby? Right there huh?,” Joel teased, picking up the pace a bit when another surge of slick bathed his fingers, dripping down to the crease of your ass to help ease the glide. 

A howl came from you when Joel lifted a leg onto his shoulder, your eyes rolling into the back of your head as he slid even deeper than before. He swore, his breaths fanning out across your heated skin as he lost every bit of self control. He couldn’t help himself, especially not when your nails were tearing at his back as he slammed himself in and out. You were so tight, clenching down on his cock so hard when he slid a fourth finger inside of your sopping cunt that it almost hurt. 

“F-Full, m’so full, shi-it,” you squeaked, eyes glazed over as he pounded into you. 

“Course ya are darling, remember what I said after I started fucking this tight pussy? I told ya that I’d ruin you for anyone else. Did ya think I was joking?,” he reminded you, chuckling at your garbled sob when he brought your other leg up to rest on the opposite shoulder, “Aw baby, don’t cry. Look how well you take it, s’like every hole was meant for me.” 

“M-Meant for you, fuu-uck ngh, all for you,” you echoed, too out of it to do anything other than repeat his words back to him. 

Joel leaned forward, folding you in half so that your knees were almost up to your ears as he pressed his lips into yours. He chuckled at how uncoordinated it was, all tongue and teeth as he continued to pound into you at an unforgivable pace. It was only when he broke away, lifting himself from the bed so that he could get a better look at your trembling form, that he understood the extent of the damage. 

With your hair spread out against the pillows, you could have easily been mistaken for a fallen angel, like something out of a storybook about fairies and nymphs. The exception being the way Joel’s cock was thrusting in and out of your asshole, the skin around it taut with the enormity of the stretch. There was no way that he wouldn’t leave you gaping when he pulled out and the thought of that was enough to throw him off of his rhythm for a few thrusts before he got himself under control. Your pussy leaked steadily onto his cock, dripping down the heavy sack that thwapped against your backside with each thrust. 

The way you looked up at him; so full of love, lust, and devotion, almost made Joel pass out. He couldn’t figure out which was more tantalizing to look at, your overstretched holes or the way you bit your lip as you eye fucked him into another dimension. Either way, he was doomed, as he could feel himself barreling towards the end. 

“Christ darling, are you close? I - oh shit - that’s it baby, good fucking girl,” Joel grunted, his thrusts getting faster as your hips moved to greedily meet his each time. 

“Close, so close daddy. I need, I just need,” you huffed, fingernails digging into his shoulders until beads of blood ran down his back. 

“What? What d’ya need babygirl? My girl, my love, my - fuck mmpfh - tell me. Please, I need to - ungh, god - I need to know darling,” Joel hissed, the angry lines across his shoulders and back stinging so deliciously that he almost broke.  

“You.” 

And who was Joel to say no to such a flattering request? Butterflies erupted from his belly, only worsening the flames that licked at his spine as he leaned forward once more to claim your mouth with his. His pace never faltered, continuing to pound into your tight hole with all of his might while his fingers reached that spongy spot deep inside of your pussy that made it gush. 

Joel felt your walls begin to tighten up even more, your high pitched whimpers muffled against his lips as he tangled his tongue with yours. You were so close, but you needed one last push. So he pulled away, kissing down your neck with a mischievous grin. He halted at your chest and took one of your overly sensitive nipples into his mouth, teasing it with his teeth for a few breaths before he sucked hard, launching you into an earth shattering release.

“Yes, yes, yes, yes, FUCK! JOEL!,” you shrieked, bucking wildly as you gushed all over him. 

The force of your orgasm pushed his fingers from your core as you squirted, spraying so much slick that Joel kicked himself for not putting down a towel first. Nevertheless, he groaned as he felt your walls squeeze down on his cock with all their might, giving him no other option than to cum. He was careful not to shove his knot inside, overriding his pesky instincts in fear that the thick patch of skin at the base of his cock would tear you to pieces. Instead, he kept himself a few inches back, his chest heaving as a much needed release tore out of him. 

Joel’s vision went dark and he flopped down on top of you, groaning into your ear as he sprayed thick ropes of cum into your ass. Wave after wave of pleasure washed over the both of you, until your minds were emptied of everything except for the euphoria of being entangled with each other. Joel melted into your shaking form, uncaring of how heavy his body may be as he snuffled at your heaving breasts and scented along your bruised neck. 

The whimper Joel let out at the feeling of your fingers scratching at his scalp would have been embarrassing, had he not been so drunk off of you that he couldn’t even remember his own name. What was he supposed to do? Act tough? How was he supposed to do that when it took him nearly a whole three minutes to be able to see straight again? 

“Are you okay babe?,” you asked gruffly, voice still scratchy from the way you had sucked him into a frenzied state and then screamed in pleasure as he fucked you. 

Joel let out a breathy laugh, “Pretty sure that’s my line darling.” 

The giggle you gave forced Joel to pop his head up off your chest, just in time for him to catch the tail end of it with his heart filled eyes. He knew he should start cleaning up, perhaps even run another bath for you to ease any potential aches he may have caused, but he stayed still. He didn’t move to pull his cock out, too enamored with the way you smiled at him and how beautiful you looked in the post orgasmic haze that had settled over the quiet room. 

“Just figured I’d ask if you were okay considering the fact that you nearly had a stroke when I asked you to fuck me in the ass. You can’t fault me for making sure my old man doesn’t keel over anytime soon,” you joked, eyes twinkling with playfulness as you poked at his sides.

“Old man? Keel over?!,” he guffawed, “S’that right darling?” 

You nodded, “Yeah, but it’s okay. I think it’s very hot that you’re so much more experienced. It’s like you’re my teacher, the sexy kind.” 

Joel chuckled and shook his head, ignoring your quip so he could give you another, more meaningful kiss this time. As he allowed his lips to speak for him, pouring every loving compliment and faithful promise he had for you into the act, he slowly pulled his cock free. A small noise of protest was muffled against his mouth, but he worked his magic, slipping his tongue into the mix to distract you from the discomfort that came with his absence. When he was out, he pulled away and looked down, greedily taking in your gaping holes so that he could savor the moment, keeping the sight of you all fucked out locked away somewhere in his brain for a rainy day. 

“That is fucking sinful baby, fuck. I can’t believe how fucking gorgeous you look like this, I’m the luckiest man alive,” Joel praised, watching as a thick glob of cum slid from your asshole, all the way down to ruined sheets below. 

“Was it everything you dreamed of?,” you jested. 

The way you asked the question made it seem like a joke but Joel could sense a hint of self consciousness, as if you hadn’t just rocked his world and once again secured your place as the lead role of his wet dreams for the rest of his life. He was at a loss for words, unable to comprehend why you would think he would do anything other than grovel at your feet for all of eternity after you had let him do something so intimate. Nonetheless, he also knew how you often looked down on yourself. If there was one thing Joel hated, it was how kind you were to everyone except yourself, and he refused to let that ruin this perfect moment. 

“My girl, my sweet girl, of course it was. Felt so good,” Joel promised, pressing another kiss to your mouth to reinforce his words, “And fuck honey, you were so fucking sexy. I didn’t even know where to look, it was all so hot. You were like every fantasy I’ve ever had, come to life.” 

“Really?,” you gasped, the hopefulness in your expression making his heart sing. 

“Well baby, I only ever fantasize about you when I’m alone, so yeah. Everytime I’ve thought about fucking someone in the ass, it’s been your asshole I’ve dreamed about,” he joked. 

You cackled, “Okay, but why do I find that incredibly romantic?”

The ridiculousness of the statement was not lost on him, but it forced a round of raucous laughter from the both of you that echoed throughout the house. Joel laughed until his belly ached and his eyes were filled with tears, until he was sure he was going to be sick if he didn’t stop. After a few failed attempts, he finally calmed down and wiped the tears from his damp cheeks. When his face was free of tears, he gazed upon you, his soul ablaze with adoration at the dopey grin you sent his way. 

“And you honey? What did ya think? Was I too rough?,” Joel asked, almost nervous to hear your answer. 

Although Joel had been gentle at the beginning, he hadn’t been able to keep it together for very long. How could he? This was something so new for the both of you, so raunchy and erotic and loving all at once, that he was surprised he had lasted long enough to put it in. There were multiple points where he was sure he was going to explode, to ruin the moment with a premature orgasm splattered all over his hairy belly. But luckily, he had been able to hold off long enough to make you cum. However, Joel was no spring chicken, which meant that he also knew that cumming did not necessarily mean complete satisfaction. 

“I fucking loved it Joel,” you admitted, soothing his worries with a toothy grin, “I’ve never wanted to try that like… at all, but I don’t know babe. You just bring out the freaky side in me I guess. We should do that again sometime, or maybe I could do it to you.” 

Joel’s eyes widened at that, his mouth falling open in shock. One or two fingers was one thing, but the thought of you strapped up and fucking him in the ass was something else entirely. There were some logistics that would have to be worked out if you were being serious. Like, where the hell would he find a sex toy in a post-outbreak world? With all of the sleazy sex shops closed for good, it would likely take some time to find the right tools. Still, Joel was surprised at how intrigued he was, like all of his years of being strictly a giver suddenly meant nothing to him. His cock gave his interest away immediately, twitching hard against your thigh in response to the lewd offer. 

“Oh babe, he liked that hm?,” you teased, dousing the fire that had already begun to stir again with pure gasoline. 

“Fuck darling, don’t start,” he groaned, trying to keep his head straight so that he could focus on cleaning you up. 

Although Joel would love nothing more than to fuck you until the sun was high in the sky, he had to be realistic. There were two small humans that would need to be picked up in the morning and they never seemed to give a shit about how much sleep their parents had gotten the night before. The thought of having to deal with the twins after a sleepless night made him feel nauseous and he couldn’t imagine how much worse it would be for the woman who had to feed them. 

Nevertheless, when you reached down and roughly squeezed his still sensitive cock, circling the tip of it with your thumb, Joel’s resolve broke. Without another word, he lifted you from the bed, muttering curses under his breath as he carried you back towards the bathroom. 

“What are you doing?,” you laughed. 

“Gotta clean ya up again honey, then m’gonna fuck ya until you’re too exhausted to be such a fucking tease,” Joel grumbled, unleashing a harsh slap against your already bruised cheeks that had you keening into his ear. 

The laugh you let out when you caught your breath was weaker than the last, but it made it clear to Joel that he had his work cut out for him if he wanted to get a wink of sleep that night. 

“All I’m hearing is that you really want me to peg you babe and if that’s the case, I’m game. We’ll just have to figure out what to use I guess,” you sighed in fake contemplation. 

Joel rolled his eyes, “Oh believe me babygirl, we’re saving that for another day. But right now, I gotta remind you again why you don’t tease daddy. Seems like you didn’t pay too much attention the first time around.” 

With that Joel walked straight into the shower, ignoring how long it took for the water to heat up as he sheltered your body from the freezing pellets and pinned you to the wall. He bit at your neck and chest, already fully hard from your words alone. Maybe it would take him all night to fuck the attitude out of you, but as he felt your teeth dig into his shoulder and your fingers yank at his curls, he couldn’t remember why that had been a bad thing to begin with. 

The love marks that were scattered across your body tripled that night, with each round proving to be more devastating than the last. It was only when you had tearfully begged him to stop after your tenth orgasm, pussy clenching painfully hard around the knot that he had mindlessly slammed inside, that he had finally relented.  

Afterwards, Joel cleaned the cum sticking to the insides of your thighs and cooed at your soft whines of protest. In the comfort of the quiet room, he let himself give in to your all-encompassing presence. Sure, there would be questions about the missing men that were slated for trial in a few hours and sure, the fingers would likely be pointed at him, but he didn’t care. 

In that moment, all Joel cared about was holding you close, tangling his limbs with yours as he drifted off. The last thing he thought of before he let the abyss take him was the endless tomorrows that stretched out in front of him and how the future he had once dreamed of was well within his reach. With that comforting realization, Joel let himself go, snuggling closer to his favorite person as he finally allowed himself to rest. 

- You - 

The pounding was relentless, pulling you from the strangest of dreams where Ellis and Alba had suddenly grown into adults who no longer knew who you were. It had been quite jarring. When you had tearfully informed them that you were their mother, they had acted as if it meant nothing to them, like they had never known your love for them. It was an uncomfortable thought and it had you groggy as you lifted yourself from Joel’s chest so that you could look around, trying to pinpoint the noise that was growing steadily in volume with each passing moment. A familiar voice began to accompany the knocks, breaking you from the dream induced daze you were in, and you suddenly realized what was happening. 

“Joel, Joel wake up,” you hissed, shaking his shoulders until he groaned and blinked up at you.  

“Fucking hell baby, what?,” Joel asked in an exasperated tone, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he did. 

Another flurry of knocks to the front door answered him and you watched as the realization dawned upon him as well. Joel sat up from his place in the bed, sighing as he swung his legs over the side of it and stood up. Wringing your hands nervously, you followed close behind, mirroring his movements as he dressed in a pair of jeans and his rust colored henley. When you were done, you hovered as he put on his socks, too nervous to say anything or even breathe. 

“Hey now sweet girl, c’mere,” Joel cooed when he noticed you waiting for him by the door, biting your bottom lip so hard that blood dripped onto your chin. 

With the shakiest of limbs, you heeded his request, ignoring the way Tommy’s bellowing cut through the thick wood of the front door. When you reached him, Joel cupped your face and kissed you once, knocking his forehead against yours gently in an attempt to calm you down. 

Usually, such a simple gesture would have eased all of the stress from your strained muscles, but not this time. As you stood before him, dripping with a cold sweat and aggravated beyond belief, you felt like you were about to explode. It was as if someone had lit up all the nerve endings in your body and every touch from him only made them burn brighter. 

Something was wrong. You could feel it in the way your legs shook not from anxiety, but from a neediness that hailed from somewhere deep within. However, recognizing the symptoms of an ailment did not mean that you could reasonably determine the cause, and you were left wondering what the hell was happening as the youngest Miller beat your door down. 

“S’alright honey, I know this is gonna be scary for ya, but just remember that they don’t know anything. All they have is a burnt down barn and two suspects who weren’t seen by anyone in town. We just gotta stay quiet and stick to the story,” Joel reminded you. 

“Okay,” you whispered, “What’s the story though?”

He shrugged, “That we don’t know jackshit.” 

Joel placed one last kiss to your forehead before he opened the bedroom door, holding his hand out for you to take as he drifted into the hallway. He was so at ease with the situation that it only made you more nervous, like all of his nerves from the previous night had been transferred onto you and subsequently cranked to a thousand. You were slightly embarrassed at the state of you, especially since you weren’t exactly sure what was wrong. Sweat poured down your face and drenched your shirt, until the fabric was glued to your back. The muscles between your hips were clenched so tightly that they felt like they might tear apart if the pressure wasn’t released soon, but Joel was none the wiser. If anything, he only seemed more sure of himself, like he was thriving off of your sudden descent into madness. 

“Wait,” you called out when Joel reached the door, halting him in his tracks and forcing him to turn to face you. 

Despite the circumstance, you couldn’t help but notice how pretty your mate was with all of his best features lit up perfectly by the morning sun. Normally, a thought like that would have turned you into a sappy mess, but all you could feel was a burning desire. It was the type of desire that was slowly turning you into an absolute maniac when you needed to be cool. Trying to get it together, you shook yourself out of the haze, taking a breath so that you could say what you needed to say to him without begging him to fuck you right then and there. 

“I love you Joel, remember that and don’t forget about the twins, okay? They need their dad, so don’t go letting your temper get the best of you when they come in and start asking questions. We need to be smart about this,” you reminded him. 

He nodded, “I know honey, I’ve got this, don't you worry.” 

You should have left it at that gentle reminder, but the darkness had taken control, forcing you to grab his hand and squeeze it hard as you continued. 

“They can’t have you Joel, I won’t let them. I will tear out all of their throats with my bare hands if they try to take you from us. You are mine, not theirs,” you seethed. 

Joel cocked his head, his eyes running up and down your body with renewed interest. It lit your core on fire and your knees shook from his undivided attention. Craving Joel’s attention was nothing new, in fact you spent most of your days looking forward to the moment that his loving gaze fell upon you once more, but this felt different. That morning, it felt like you might die if he looked away from you, like you would walk across a pit of hot coals just to get him to glance in your direction. 

“Are you alright honey?,” Joel asked carefully, reaching forward to place the back of his hand against your sweaty forehead. 

Whatever Joel found, it made him grimace, but he quickly wiped the displeasure from his face away before you could react to it. Were you alright? That was the million dollar question. With an unenthusiastic shrug, you nodded, unsure of what it was he wanted you to say. Of course you weren’t alright, there were people in Jackson that were now sticking their noses where they didn’t belong. But aside from that glaring fact, you supposed that everything else was fine. There was no reason for it not to be. 

“Okay uh, I love you baby. Just stay close to me, okay? Might make this a bit easier for ya considering that you’re um… Yeah, anyways,” Joel cut himself off, turning back towards the door so that he could unlatch it. 

Before you had the chance to ask him what it was he was going to say, the door was thrown open, revealing the faces of more people than you had originally expected. Tommy and Maria were at the forefront of the group, but they had come with almost ten other souls trailing behind. Out of all of the faces that were amongst the crowd, the only other one you recognized was Cooper’s, who looked at you with thinly veiled pity and remorse. You wanted to ask him why he was gazing upon you with such compassion but you couldn’t, as Maria had already started talking. 

“Joel, we’re here to bring you in for some questioning. Could you please follow us downtown?,” Maria asked, her tone giving absolutely nothing away. 

“Questioning? About what?,” Joel shot back, causing her to suck her teeth while Tommy cussed and kicked the dirt beside her. 

“I think you know exactly what I’m talking about Joel but sure, let’s play pretend,” she jested, her voice laden with sarcasm, “Last night someone took two men, the same ones who abducted YOUR mate, from their cells. This morning, a patrol found a barn burned to the ground a few miles out with nothing left behind except some half smoked cigarettes and two burnt up bodies.” 

He shrugged, “Damn, that’s crazy, but I don’t know nothing about that shit.” 

With a sigh, Maria nodded to the people behind her and two of them came forward, yanking Joel from his place at your side so that they could drag him down the driveway. A storm brewed inside as you watched the situation unfold, one that you had not felt for some time, not even the night before when you had killed those two assholes. It was a dangerous feeling that you had first come to know when Joel had been taken by Paul’s men, one that you had used to sustain yourself during the dark period without him. And it had been revived once more, causing you to sprint towards the man closest to you to attack him with a flurry of scratches and bites. 

“Shit, what the hell?! Maria! Tommy! Jesus Christ, someone get this bitch off of me,” the man shouted, your fingernails scraping against his cornea in response. 

“NO!,” Joel roared and you heard a scuffle from somewhere behind you. 

Tommy pried you off of the stranger, his arms wrapped carefully around your midsection like he was trying his best not to harm you as he did. It was a kind gesture, especially with the countless punches you sent his way in response. Hissing threats and spitting at the large group, you fought back with every bit of strength you possessed. They would not take Joel from you like this, you wouldn’t allow it. At that moment, every fiber of your being screamed for his presence to remain at your side. An unsettling kind of desperation settled inside, fiercely calling out for him like he was the answer to all of the world’s problems. 

“I wil fucking kill you if you hurt him, do you hear me?! He is MINE! My alpha, my mate, not yours! Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you,” you screeched, growling at Tommy for restraining you, along with everyone else for being involved. 

“Are y’all fucking stupid? Look at her! She’s not gonna stop in the state she’s in, so you might as well let her go,” Joel argued, though when you tried to look for him in the crowd you could barely see him through the haze that clouded your vision. 

It was as if a film had settled over your eyes, shrouding your surroundings so that all you could focus on was Joel’s whereabouts. And at that moment, with him not placed directly in front of you, it was impossible to see anything. All you knew for sure was that he was not where he was supposed to be. A broken whine tumbled from your lips at that realization, which was answered by the infuriated growl of your mate who was restrained somewhere near the end of the driveway. Tears dripped down your face, a broken sob filling the air as you cried out for Joel. 

“Ew, what the fuck?,” Tommy groaned, gagging at how aggressively your scent was being pumped into the open air, your hormones working overtime to alert Joel of the discomfort you were feeling. 

“Let her go to him,” Maria relented, seemingly exhausted by the display in front of her already. 

After being unceremoniously dropped to the ground by the beta, you blindly scampered off in search of your alpha, going off of instinct alone to reach him. The second you found him, you felt a weight roll off your shoulders and the film over your eyes dissipated, leaving you with the most radiant sight of the man you loved. Joel’s nostrils flared as he looked down at you, his arms still restrained by the two men while his pupils grew larger by the second. He looked about as crazy as you felt and you answered his insanity with a tight hug, whimpering his name as you wrapped your arms around his soft midsection. 

A conversation was had behind you, one where all parties seemed as exasperated as they were pissed off. Joel allowed you to scent him as they debated, the only sign that he noticed your doting being when you suddenly chomped down on his gland. He hissed and shot you a look of warning, which you answered by cheekily laving your tongue over the indent you had left. It was meant to soothe the sting, but you couldn’t help the moan you let out as the taste of his delicious scent graced your tongue. For some reason, you couldn’t find it in yourself to be embarrassed at the public display of affection. The fire in your veins made it impossible for you to think about anything else except for him. 

“Well we can’t leave her here all alone. Look at them, they’ll both go fucking nuts! At this rate, we’re lucky if we get an hour of questioning in before it hits. Why don’t we just make do and stay here? S’not like either of them would make it very far,” Tommy argued, with a mix of murmured agreements and disagreements coming from all sides. 

“We could just say fuck it and let them both deal with it themselves. I mean, come on guys, who cares about a silly little heat? She could just go find some other alpha to keep her happy. And he’ll be locked up so the rut isn’t really an issue, is it?,” someone protested. 

“It’d be cruel to keep them apart,” Cooper responded softly.

When all the eyes turned towards him, you turned your head just in time to see him visibly shrink under the weight of their stares. A vibrant flush broke out along the tops of Cooper’s ears and you suddenly wished that your brain was functioning properly so that you could come to his defense. However, luckily for your best friend's introverted husband, Maria came to the rescue. 

“Mikey, that’s not how we do things. They are mates, which means she’s not going to want another alpha to, as you say, ‘keep her happy’. There’s no need to cause undue stress on an omega during such a vulnerable time,” Maria said, putting the matter to bed in an instant.

“She stays with me,” Joel declared abruptly, causing the rest of the group to face him. 

A beat of silence passed, one that made you so uneasy that you whined Joel’s name into his neck, wordlessly begging him to save you from a situation that you couldn’t fully wrap your brain around. The terror you felt at the thought of him being out of reach grew with each passing second, until you were practically hyperventilating as your fingernails scrabbled at his burly chest, like you were trying to carve out a space for yourself inside of him. 

“Easy there, pretty girl. I know you're feelin’ a bit antsy, but m’here” he murmured, turning his face so that he could speak directly into your ear, “I need you to take some deep breaths for me, okay? Everything is gonna be just fine honey, but ya gotta breathe.”

“But Joel -” 

“But nothing,” Joel snapped, his soft voice shifting into an authoritative snarl, “I need you to breathe omega. Take two deep breaths for me right now.” 

The command spoke to your soul, shutting off any higher thinking and leaving you with nothing but the desire to fulfill the request of your mate. While you tuned out the conversation behind you, gulping down the oxygen you had been unknowingly withholding, you focused on his proximity. Having Joel this close to you was nothing new, but in that moment it was like a shot of oxytocin straight to the heart, pumping throughout your body with every heavy thump. Despite the crowd, you wanted nothing more than to climb him like a tree and grind your hips down onto his cock until he fucked you, but you knew he’d just command you to behave. Until the group departed, you’d just have to settle on scenting him and whining in his ear. 

“Okay, we’ll do that then and it’ll just,” Maria sighed and shook her head, “It’ll have to do. We can figure out the rest if we need to later. For now, let him go guys. I really don’t want to see what happens if we don’t.” 

The second Joel was released, you felt his strong arms surrounding you, crushing you to his chest so hard that it left you breathless. Another cry came from your lips, except this one was out of relief rather than despair. His embrace was exactly what you needed to soothe the deep ache that had started between your legs and you clung to him fervently. However, the longer you stayed glued to Joel, the hotter you became, until the front of his jeans and henley were drenched in your sweat. 

You tried to remind yourself that there had been other instances where you had felt this way, instances that you had survived. Pushing through the fog that had settled over your mind, you scrolled through your memories, recalling the days spent locked inside of your childhood bedroom, crying out for a cure that would never come. Only once in your life had the prayers for reprieve been answered, when a ruggedly handsome alpha had found you in his bed, whimpering his name and humping his dirty clothes with abandon. That alpha had been merciful, soothing the deep ache with his powerful thrusts until it finally faded away. 

It was that specific memory that flipped a switch in your brain, forcing you to finally realize what was happening. The reality of the situation hit you square in the face, terror taking over as you silently begged any higher power that would listen to halt the progression of the heat that gathered in your core. This couldn’t be happening, it was too soon since having the twins. The doctor had given you a vague timeline at your last checkup, assuring you that although it was possible for omegas to start having heats again as soon as the second month after giving birth, most went heat-free until at least the fourth. With your breasts still swollen and your midsection finally free from the post-birth bloating, you tried not to cry. How could mother nature betray you so soon?

“Alpha,” you mewled, knees violently shaking with fear. 

“Hush now darling, s’okay, I gotcha. I ain’t going nowhere baby, I promise. We’re just gonna go inside and talk to these nice people in the living room, m’kay? Nothing is gonna happen to you omega, you’re safe with me,” Joel murmured, pressing his face into your skin to cover you in his scent. 

“No, no, no, no,” you sobbed, “Don’t want any strangers inside, just want you.” 

A grunt left his mouth when you suddenly leaped from the ground, climbing him so that you could hang off his neck like a monkey. Joel groaned in frustration but allowed it, wrapping your legs around his waist so that he could comfortably carry you around. The eyes on you two were abundant, especially since Joel was not typically known for any great displays of affection. Sure, he would hold your hand while strolling through the streets or press a chaste kiss to your cheek when you brought him lunch, but allowing you to wrap yourself around him like a python was new. Too embarrassed to look back at the plethora of Jackson residents that gawked at the display, you buried your flushed face into his chest and tried to focus on his comforting scent. 

“We should probably uh… Get on with it, or at least do them the decency of getting ‘em off the street. The looky-loos don’t need to be seeing this,” Tommy murmured to his mate. 

“I agree,” was all she said back to him. 

Joel sighed in relief, and although your brain was having trouble keeping up with the situation, his slight change in demeanor comforted you beyond belief. 

“Tommy and I will deal with this alone. The rest of you can go back to your posts. Even if something comes of this, I don’t think we’ll be able to do anything about it today, not until this passes at the very least,” Maria called to the crowd. 

With that, you heard them disperse, looking up only to catch a glimpse of Cooper staring hard at you clinging to Joel. It threw you off guard, as the alpha usually avoided eye contact with everyone other than Jake or his two daughters, but he was undeterred. His unwavering gaze didn’t scare you, nor did it feel pervasive in any way. Instead, it felt like he was simply trying to gauge your wellness, like he was trying to figure out a way that he could help the girl he had known since his twisted childhood. Although it was extremely confusing, as you couldn’t understand why he would feel such loyalty towards you when Jake was nowhere to be found, it was oddly comforting. After another few seconds of the impromptu staring contest, Cooper nodded, mouthing don’t worry at you before he turned to leave with the rest of the group. 

Confused by Cooper’s silent promise, you elected to ignore it and buried yourself back into Joel’s chest as he carried you inside to escape any of the crowd’s lingering stares. The second his feet crossed the threshold, a sense of peace washed over you, the home blanketing you in security despite the conversation that needed to be had. It was as if the home the two of you had built was a fortress, keeping you safe from any dangers, even if there were currently dangers following you inside. 

Joel veered off into the living room, whispering a soft plea for you to unwrap your legs so that he could sit semi-decently on the couch. It took a few tries, with you too stubborn to allow him such a luxury, but you eventually relented after another strict command hissed into your ear. He placed you on the cushion beside him, throwing himself down with a frustrated huff. 

Looking down, you could plainly see what was frustrating Joel. A prominent bulge stuck out from his lap, his cock straining against the zipper of his jeans with so much force that the first few metal teeth had come unzipped completely on their own. The tight squeeze had to be torturous for him, just as the drenched gusset of your panties were for you, but thankfully you were both cognitive enough to ignore the pain for now. For the time being, you soothed the sting by climbing into his lap, forcing him to hold you close rather than dutifully keeping the distance. 

“If you’re gonna sit like that, you gotta be good f’me babygirl,” Joel whispered in your ear, easing you off of the hard lump in his pants so that you could sit in between his legs. 

Based on the way Joel’s cock was fully erect and poking at your back, you knew that this was not a request, but an order from your alpha. With his little brother and sister in law in the room, the last thing he needed was you grinding up against him like a depraved whore. It was inappropriate, not to mention it would inevitably lead to his pesky instincts taking over, leaving him no other choice than to stake his claim over you regardless of the company. 

The thought of Joel slamming into you in front of a crowd was nerve racking, although it did send a thrill down your spine that ended with a sharp throb between your legs, but you shook it off. Now was not the time to test out an exhibition kink, now was time to sit silently and feign innocence. Which was why you nodded in agreement to Joel’s words, pulling his arms around you in an attempt to quell some of the heat induced mania. It didn’t work of course, but being surrounded by him at least made you feel a bit less vulnerable. 

“Talk,” Joel grunted, sending a shiver down your spine despite the fact that the command was not for you. 

Tommy scratched the back of his head, looking like he was ready to run out of the house screaming the second he saw his brother do something even remotely sexual in front of him. Even Maria, with all of her usual professionalism and unquestionable leadership skills, looked a bit green around the gills to be sitting across from mates who were about to dive headfirst into days of ravenous need. Nevertheless, she kept her cool, clearing her throat before she dove headfirst into the issue. 

“Look, how about we cut the crap? I don’t want to be here and this HAS to be uncomfortable for you two as well. Why don’t you just tell me what the fuck happened last night so that we can leave you to it for a couple of days, sound good?,” Maria bartered. 

“I already told ya, I don’t know anything about that. Last night we had a nice dinner, took a walk around town, then we came back and hit the hay. We’ve got two kids y’all, we’re fucking exhausted. So whatever happened, it don’t got nothing to do with us,” Joel reiterated. 

“Joel, we know that it was you. Who else would it fucking be?,” Tommy sighed, shaking his head at his brother’s excuse, “I just don’t get it. I mean, you just said it, you have two kids, so why the hell would you go after them? Especially when we already said that we would deal with it! What the fuck are we supposed to do now? You broke the goddamn rules, AGAIN!”  

Joel stayed silent, preferring to quietly glare at his brother for mentioning his children. You didn’t blame him, hearing the twins being brought up in the conversation had alarm bells going off in your head as well. The less refined part of your mind was in complete control at that moment, the effects of your heat mixing dangerously with your motherly instincts and slowly turning you into a beast. Joel must have sensed it, as he suddenly squeezed you back against his chest,using the warmth that radiated off of him to soothe your growing discontent. It worked, kind of, but it couldn’t stop the words that tumbled from your lips. 

“How do you know it was Joel? Maybe it was me,” you sassed, causing all eyes to turn towards you. 

The two betas looked at each other, then back at you, both of their reactions wildly different from the other. Tommy looked resigned, almost as if he had already guessed it was you that had been the culprit rather than Joel. That made you want to laugh, as you remembered how Joel had once confided that his brother found you particularly terrifying. Perhaps that could finally work in your favor. Meanwhile, Maria gazed upon you with interest, not completely accepting or rejecting the idea of your culpability. 

“If that were the case, I would say that it is a crime to murder another Jackson resident, even if they were already slated for execution. And I would also remind you before making that sort of confession, that you have two pups who haven’t been weaned yet,” Maria pointed out. 

Anger flared up inside of you, the smoke practically pouring from your ears at her words. Logically, you knew that Maria was just trying to be helpful, as two pups being torn from their mother while they were in need of breastmilk was no small thing. But wetnurses existed for a reason, which made her argument null and void. Given Maria’s previous distaste for your mate, all you could hear was that your life was worth more to her than Joel’s, that the jury was already out on him despite the lack of evidence. 

“So what? The pups can’t survive without their mom but they’ll be perfectly fine without their dad? Because I can tell you from personal experience, that’s not true. Do you really think I could do this without Joel? That I would even want to?,” you spat. 

“Well, I think -”

“I don’t give a flying fuck what you think. What Ellis and Alba need is both of us, not one or the other. And don’t kid yourself Maria, we all know you’re only accusing him because of the fucking grudge you have,” you hissed through a clenched jaw. 

Tommy jumped in, “Okay! How about we all take a deep breath before this gets out of control. I know we are all heated, but that’s not exactly what Maria was sayin -”

“If you touch him, mark my fucking words Maria; I will burn Jackson to the ground with every resident still inside. You’re gonna wish that you had found me guilty instead,” you cut in, hauling yourself up on shaky limbs to stalk towards the two betas like some sort of rabid dog. 

Before you could reach your target, Joel yanked you back towards the couch, easily wrangling you in between his legs despite your attempts to escape him. A frustrated groan bubbled up from your chest, one that was quieted by the feeling of him caging you in once more. An image flashed through your mind as you were forced to sit back, one that included you beating the shit out of the both of them for threatening your family in this way, but you shook it off. There wasn’t any truth to the enticing image, as the last thing you wanted to do was harm your own family. It was the heat talking, begging to be quelled by any means necessary; be it by Joel’s veiny cock or the blood of those who sought to harm him. 

“Stay calm for me darling, s’okay, we’re okay. They ain’t gonna do nothing,” he cooed, rubbing every part of your body that was appropriate for him to touch in front of guests. 

You wriggled in his hold, whining at Joel’s steady hands as you tried to free yourself. After a few more weak shoves and harmless elbow jabs, it was clear that you had lost the battle, leaving you with no other choice but to surrender to his hold. 

“I mean it,” you growled before you finally relented, staring directly at Maria as you said it. 

Joel sighed, “They heard ya the first time baby, now relax. Y’need to cut it out so we can get through this. Just be good f’me and stop with the threats, okay?” 

Another loud whine of protest came from you, but you nodded. Sitting back against Joel, you looked at the two visitors through wary eyes, giving off an air of contempt despite their overly cheery attempts at keeping the situation pleasant. They were betas, they had no idea what going through a heat or a rut was like, which meant they had no clue how jarring it was to have anyone other than your mate in the room while it was roaring to life. If they did, they’d be halfway across town by now. Instead they sat across from the two of you, wrinkling their noses as your scents permeated the air and mixed together to create an overbearing aroma. 

“Well, I appreciate your… candor, but this has nothing to do with my past grievances with Joel. I’m here because there are two bodies that have been found and the only possible culprits seem to be one of you. If you want to take responsibility for it, I’m all ears, but until then I’ll assume it’s the guy who already has a long ass history of violence,” Maria deadpanned. 

That made you soften a bit, as you were reminded that she was not the same as the other leaders you had the pleasure of treating with over the years. She was fair, it was you who had made a snap judgment on her. 

“Now, people in town are going to have questions. They expected a fair trial and all they got was ash,” she said, sounding exhausted by the mere thought of it, “I need to be able to tell them something better than just a ‘I don’t know anything about that.’ So how about you try again?”

“Well, I don’t know what it is you want me to say though. How about you tell me the magic words to getcha both out of my hair?,” Joel grouched. 

Tommy threw his hands up in the air, laughing in disbelief at his older brother’s coarse words. What your mate seemed to be missing was that she was giving him an out, granting him the luxury of innocence if he could simply think of a better story, one that the locals that despised him would actually accept.  

“Joel, use your fucking head. You know how many people hate your guts in this town. How would it look if we just let ya go? What does that say about justice in Jackson? Unless you can give us a better response, they’re gonna demand we hang your ass for this,” Tommy explained. 

Another silence followed, one that had you reeling. Joel had clearly been the main suspect for Maria and the rest of the residents, while Tommy had obviously assumed the guilty party to be you. What story could he possibly come up with to cover it up? Where did Joel’s reputation of being a menace to society leave him in terms of passing the buck? Nowhere, which meant you had only one choice if you wanted him saved from the noose. 

“And if I did confess to doing it, what would happen to Joel? What would happen to my pups? Would they be able to stay here without me? Would you keep them safe?,” you rushed out, wanting to get it out before Joel intervened. 

“Now, hang on a minute honey I ain’t - ” 

Maria cut in, “They would be free to stay and we would keep them safe. But like I said before, the story is what matters here. Joel and the twins would be welcome here if the worst came to pass, but I’m not sure you understand what it is I’m trying to say.” 

Joel pulled you back by the shoulders, a crazed look in his eye as he studied you. But you were uncharacteristically calm, a sense of peace drowning out your raging heat for just a moment. There wasn’t going to be another excuse as good as the vengeful mother. Whereas they would undoubtedly hang Joel for murder, it was more likely that they would exile you; the overly emotional omega who had been threatened as she went into labor. 

Although you would be doomed to a harsh life beyond the walls, ducking fates worse than death at every turn, your pups would be safe with their father. Joel could raise the twins, he’d already raised a kid all by himself once before with Sarah. They would fare better with him and your kids would ultimately be, above all else, safe within Jackson’s walls. It didn’t matter that they would never know their mother’s face or how much you loved them, nor did it matter that your heart was being shredded to pieces at the thought of leaving them behind, all that mattered at the end of the day was their safety. 

Afterall, what is motherhood if not putting your children first? Your own mother had forgotten that too many times to count, but you refused to do the same. 

“Baby, what the hell do you think you’re doing?! Y’cant just fucking leave me here alone, I won’t let you. If you leave me, I’ll come after ya and drag you back to Jackson if it’s the last thing I fucking do,” Joel promised, his vow bringing a tear to your eye. 

“No, you won’t,” you smiled sadly, “Our pups need their dad and I know you wouldn’t leave them here all alone Joel, it’s not who you are.” 

“What?!,” he cried out as his puppy dog eyes started to shine with a line of unshed tears, “Sweetheart, they need their fucking mom too, and I can’t do this without you. I-I won’t! Please baby, please stop this.”  

“If Jackson fell tomorrow, who do you think they’d be safer with? Me or you?,” you shot back, cocking your eyebrow at him, “Who can easily throw two kids over their shoulder and run for it? Because it’s not me. We need to be realistic here Joel, these are our pups we’re talking about.”

Joel’s mouth opened and closed as he worked on a response to that, but you had already turned back towards Maria. Perhaps he thought that you were being selfish, that giving in so easily and allowing them to oust you from the community was a cop out, but you didn’t think so. Growing up, your bleeding heart had been torn to pieces each day, as the adults meant to protect you had prioritized everything else over their sacred duty.  Their flagrant disregard had broken your heart over and over again, leaving you with a deep seeded belief that you were not worthy of love. 

That belief had eventually been disproved by Joel, after twenty five years of suffering on this unforgiving earth, but that didn’t mean you were completely cured. Its roots were still hidden inside, twisting your sense of self at every turn and making it nearly impossible to truly appreciate yourself in your lowest moments. It was Joel that brought you back down to earth, who made you feel like you were a vessel for all things good and beautiful. How could you possibly deprive Ellis and Alba of such a man? You couldn’t. From the second their presence had become known, you had vowed that they would always come first, even if it meant that you would have to suffer for it. 

“Fine, if you’ll take care of my family then I’ll tell you everything. I d-” 

“I DID IT!,” came from the foyer, sending a shockwave through the room from the sheer volume alone. 

There in the entranceway stood your mother, flanked by your best friend and his mate who were burdened with a clueless toddler and three thankfully sleeping pups in their arms. You watched as the tiny woman you had once feared marched forward, coming to full stop in front of the two betas with a determined look upon her face. 

“I did it, I went to your house for dinner that night and stole Tommy’s keys. Then, when the coast was clear, I took the two men out beyond the walls and killed them both. To cover it up, I burned down the barn and then I came back to Jackson before anyone could notice,” she stated. 

The balls she had to confess to a crime that she most certainly did not do had you stunned into silence. Dizzied by her actions, you were shocked to gaze upon a version of her you had thought to be dead for many years. This version of her was strong, undeterred by their authoritative stances as she proudly proclaimed her guilt to the entire room. A faint memory came to mind as you gawked at her, one that you hadn’t realized remained until that very moment. 

In the final months of your grandmother’s life, there had been a few times where your father had been too busy with his dying mother to be the stay at home dad he usually was. With kindergarten a whole summer away, your parents were left with no other choice than to send you into work with your mother. After being soothed by an armful of treats from the courthouse vending machine, you had sat silently behind her, chowing down on a heap of chocolate as she led the prosecution. Amazed by her calculated demeanor, you hadn’t even fussed once your snacks had vanished, too preoccupied with the way she cut through the defense so easily. 

At times, your mother was an incredibly impressive woman and omega. She had been the sole breadwinner in your house before the outbreak, as well as the only omega in a firm of highly paid corporate lawyers. Even after the world had come to a grinding halt, she had somehow managed to keep her only daughter alive against all odds for years before she stumbled upon Josiah’s community. That in itself deserved recognition. At times, she was the most shrewd and collected person in the room, but at that moment all you could think was that she was being incredibly stupid. 

“Mom, you don’t have t -”

“Do not interrupt your mother when she is speaking, it is rude and I have taught you better than that,” she snapped, the small glimpse of her former self silencing any further protest from you. 

“With all due respect ma’am, I don’t see how you could’ve possibly carried those two guys out of here on your own. You’re about a stone throw away from five foot nothing, and those guys were both well over six feet,” Tommy sighed, pinching his nose in frustration. 

“That’s because I helped her,” another voice said, this one more surprising than the last. 

If asked who you thought would have come to your defense first, aside from Joel, you would have assumed Jake. However, it was surprisingly Cooper who had piped up. Looking over at the man, he was more sure of himself than you had ever seen him, straightening his usually slumped spine until he had grown nearly a foot in height. What Cooper was attempting to do was very kind, but the defense made no sense. Whatever redemption he thought he needed to pursue was pointless, as you had already forgiven all of his past grievances once you learned how happy he made Jake. Although you appreciated the gesture, it was downright moronic for him to sit on his sword for your family when he had his own to worry about. 

“It’s true, I didn’t even notice that he was gone until all four kids started crying in the middle of the night. When Coop came home later, he told me everything,” Jake added, his eyes darting between you and his mate. 

That threw everyone in the room off guard. An omega tattling on their alpha was practically unheard of, as the loyalty between mates was supposed to be sacred. Even before the world went to shit, mates were not allowed to be indicted to testify against each other, as it was seen as highly unethical. Not to mention the fact that you knew how far back Jake and Cooper’s history went, spanning from stolen kisses as teens to a full blown complicated partnership as adults. Jake’s confession was astonishing, and the shock value almost made it seem plausible, but Maria was quick to dismiss it. 

“C’mon you three, there’s no way that you expect anyone to believe that you were the ones who did it,” she turned to your mother, “Sure, she’s your daughter and that’s as good of a reason as any, but Cooper? What possible reason could you have?” 

“I asked him to.”

“I asked him to.”

The way your voices overlapped would have usually made you both giggle, slapping each other like you were twelve years old again, but at that moment all you did was lock eyes. Jake shook his head once, giving you a stern look that warned against any sort of heroics. However, he had clearly forgotten how your stubbornness easily surpassed his, and you sent the same sort of pointed look straight back at him. It wasn’t fair for them to defend you in this way, especially when Jake knew you far too well to believe you were innocent. If things had been different, if Allie and Miriam didn’t exist, perhaps then you would let your bestfriend take the fall. But you were both parents now, which meant you didn’t understand how he could possibly expect you to sit back and let him dive headfirst into the mess that you had created. 

“Jesus fucking Christ, y’all are something else,” Tommy mused, his head in his hands as the situation only got more confusing with every false admission of guilt, “And why the fuck would you do that Jake?” 

It was a fair enough question and you were surprised at how much it seemed to anger him. You watched as Jake’s face turned purple, his carefully sculpted curls growing frizzy as he juggled Miriam into the crook of his elbow so he could run his hands through them. Cooper took one step towards his mate, only able to give him a soft tap with his elbow as he held both of your children in his arms, but it was enough to snap him out of it. Jake looked up from his daughter, the two of them having a silent conversation for a moment that ended when Cooper gave him a single nod of encouragement. With that, he turned back towards the group, straightening up as he stared Tommy down. 

“Are you fucking kidding me? Do you know who those pricks were working with? Do you understand how fucked up Paul’s crew was?,” Jake seethed. 

Maria cleared her throat, “We don’t have to start rehashing the pa-”

“No! You both need to listen,” he snapped. 

The two betas fell silent, looking at each other with wide eyes before they turned back towards your frustrated best friend. Although Jake was always outspoken, he was never volatile, which meant that his rage towards the two of them was shocking. 

“Did you know that they beat me in front of Coop to keep him in line? And why did it work? Oh that’s right, they stole our fucking daughter from us! And not only that, that whole group raped any omega they could find. Why would I do that?,” Jake threw his head back and cackled, “Why the fuck didn’t you?” 

A silence fell over the room as the rarely mentioned past came to rear its ugly head again. Jake didn’t even have to say what everyone was thinking, that no matter how they tried to spin it, every person in that room had a reason to kill those men. 

For you and Joel, it was pure revenge that drove you two forward, as well as the peace of mind that your family would not be hunted for the millionth time. For Jake and Cooper, it was  revenge for the hell their family had been put through, along with assurance that there were no grudges against Paul’s younger brother left to haunt them. And for your mother… Well, she was one of the countless omegas that had been used as sex slaves by those sick fucks. Who had more reason than her? Those two men had conspired with the people who abused her and then helped kidnap her pregnant daughter, of course she would go after them. 

It could have been any of you. 

Maria looked like she was about to walk straight into the ocean, with each worry line etched into her face becoming increasingly prominent by the second. Meanwhile Tommy seemed almost impressed by the solidarity of the group, though you did clock how he kept looking towards you. He looked at you like a cop might look at a repeat offender they had grown fond of, as if to say that he respected you despite your incessant crimes. If only you were the mastermind he thought you to be, perhaps then you would have been wise enough to plan it better. 

Maybe if you had a plan, you wouldn’t be sweating bullets with slick running steadily down your pant leg. The wet spot between your thighs had grown darker and wider with every passing second. By the time you gathered enough courage to look down, the stain had grown all the way down to your knees. Joel was no better, shifting and grunting from behind you as the fire in your core screamed for his cock. It wouldn’t be long before this interview became too much, you felt it in the way he squeezed your hips like stress balls, worrying your curves under his fingertips as a deep growl rumbled against your back. 

“Fucking hell, I’ve got five people in here who claim they did it and nobody’s goddamn story lines up. What the fuck do you expect me to do with that?,” Maria hissed. 

“Not sure, but you should probably make a decision soon. I don’t really wanna be here for when things get uh… desperate. Bad enough we have to stand here with their fucking kids when they’re like this. I know that I wouldn’t want mine around during a rut,” Cooper grouched. 

“I second that,” your mother said, her lips curled in disgust as wave after wave of your heady scents smacked her in the face. 

They were right to be wary of the condition you and Joel were in, as his soft caresses to your body were getting increasingly risque. He had switched from simply brushing his fingertips over your thighs to squeezing them hard, forcing a small whimper from you that made everyone else in the room shift uncomfortably. The way your scents were being pumped out was intoxicating to the both of you, while you could tell that the rest of the group would prefer to have their noses chopped off. 

It was incredibly invasive to have people see you and Joel in this way, let alone your own family. The fact that all of the adults were there was already uncomfortable, but having the twins around for this, even with them too young to understand any of it, was nerve racking. You wanted them protected from everything, especially the disgusting sight of their parents riled up for each other. As a result, you couldn’t help but turn in your spot, looking back at Joel to try to provide yourself with some sort of comfort. 

“Joel,” you whimpered softly, making sure that only he could hear it.

Joel’s eyes flicked towards you, his dilated pupils overtaking the chocolate brown until only a sliver remained. The curls you adored were standing straight up, making it look like he had been dunked in water and electrocuted. Your eyes traced his strong cheekbones, studying the deep shade of red that dusted over the high points. He looked like he was in pain, the slight crease between his brows and displeased frown showcasing the discomfort he was in. 

“I know sweetheart, I know,” Joel murmured, “They’re gonna leave soon, we’re almost there babygirl, promise.”

The high pitched whine you let out was involuntary, along with the way you abruptly turned and climbed into his lap. Joel cussed, steadying your hips as you mounted him and stuck your nose into the crook of his neck to suck at the sensitive skin there. The smell of him turned off all of your thoughts, making you forget about everyone else in the room. When you tried to rock against him, to ease some of the built up tension in your core, the hands on your hips halted your movements and you sobbed at his refusal. 

“Honey, we can’t - fuck,” he grunted as you bit down on his gland, “Fucking Christ baby, you gotta cut that shit out.” 

“Yeah uh, do you see that? That’s exactly what I was worried about. I mean, for Christ’s sake guys, I don’t want to be here for this. Do you?” Cooper pointed out, his words making you cling to your alpha even tighter. 

It wasn’t that you were scared of Cooper, or anyone else in the room, it was that the sound of anyone’s voice other than Joel’s had become grating to your overwhelmed senses. The raging beast inside of you demanded that you growl and spit at the crowd until they retreated, leaving you alone with the man that was whispering desperate pleas in your ear to stay still for everyone’s sake. And you wanted to abide by him, to remain pliant until the interrogation was done, but you couldn’t. The rational part of your brain was getting smaller by the second, being shoved to the side by the overwhelming need for Joel to temper you with his knot. 

“Leave,” you growled against Joel’s heated skin, silencing the mindless bickering from the peanut gallery behind you. 

“But we haven’t even came to a -”

Tommy’s response was overpowered by the warning sound that rumbled from within your chest and you had the distinct pleasure of watching everyone’s eyes widen as you lept from Joel’s lap, stalking across the room once more. Tommy and Maria were both going to die, you decided it right then and there. They were going to die and you would finally be able to get relief from the raging heat pulsing between your legs. It didn’t matter that your mind was muddled by hormones, nor did it matter that you actually cared for both of the betas quite deeply, all that mattered to you in that moment was getting them out of your house so you could get properly fucked. 

“Get. Out.” 

Those two words were spat out with so much contempt, so much venom, that it forced them both to lean back in their seats. They didn’t move to leave, despite the fact that you were half crazed and panting, with slick stains on clear display for everyone in the room. You looked insane and you felt it too. Which is why you launched yourself at them, your fist making contact with Tommy’s left ear with one brutal swing before you felt familiar hands pull you away once more. 

“Get the fuck out of my house! Now!,” you screeched, kicking at the alpha who tried to coral you away from the unwanted guests. 

Joel turned you around, easily lifting you from the floor so that he could wrap your legs around his waist. He shoved your face into his neck again, keeping his palm against the back of your head in case you tried to pull away. It was like he had put you in some sort of air jail, where all you could do was allow him to hold you against him so that you couldn’t attack anyone again. 

“She’s right, you all need to go,” Joel said, his calm voice cutting through your incessant growling. 

“This doesn’t mean you’re all off the hook,” Maria shot back, to which he nodded. 

“I know, but still, you gotta fucking get out of here. I can’t do this for much longer, and she’s already three sheets to the wind. Y’all are gonna have to clear out, or else m’not gonna to be held responsible for what you end up seeing,” he answered her. 

With the agreement set, the two betas swiftly stood from their place on the couch, nodding to everyone before they hurried out the door. Your mother followed close behind and you didn’t blame her for not sticking around. The thought of witnessing your own children go into a full blown heat as their mate’s rut was fast approaching made you want to throw up. 

“Will you watch them for a bit longer? Please? I don’t think we can -”

“We’ve got them under control, she sent way too much shit with them anyways,” Jake assured him, “Just return the favor sometime, that’s all we ask.” 

Joel gruffly agreed and you heard them take their leave, the sound of the front door clicking shut behind them signaling that you were finally alone. The second they were gone, he ripped your face away from his neck by the roots of your hair, smashing his mouth into yours so hard that his teeth clacked against yours. A high pitched moan came from you, which was answered by a deep groan from him as he carried you towards the stairs. The path he had in mind was clear from the second he took the first step, but you were too desperate to wait that long. With one final swipe of the tongue, you pulled back and panted against him, trying to gulp enough air down to straighten out your thoughts. 

“Daddy please, I-I can’t wait that long. F-Fuck me, ya gotta fuck me, pleeease,” you begged, tearing at his shirt until he relented and helped you take it off. 

“Needy little thing, aren’t ya?,” Joel huffed, halting on the landing in the middle of the staircase. 

Before you could ask him what he was going to do, he had already dropped down to his knees, placing you a few steps above him so that your hips were in line with his. Joel smiled at your look of surprise when he tore the clothes off of your lower half, revealing your naked pussy to his greedy gaze in an instant. 

“What a bad girl you are honey, I bet you wanted me to fuck you in front of that crowd on the street, show everyone in town what a little slut you are for me,” he praised, his voice sounding nothing short of reverent despite the filthiness of his words. 

The embarrassingly loud keen you let out was enough of an answer for Joel and before you could worry about potentially pissing him off for not answering, he was yanking off his belt. He shoved his pants down to his knees, showcasing his perfect cock that was standing proudly to attention. It was wet with precum and reddened at the tip, angrily pulsing in time with his racing heart. You mindlessly tried to reach for it, wanting to ease some of the clear discomfort for him, but your hands were quickly slapped away. 

“Later sweet girl, right now I need to feel that tight pussy around me. Fuck honey - please - please tell me that I can have her, she’s so fucking good to me,” Joel babbled, slotting his length in between your soaked centre and rubbing the tip across your swollen clit. 

In lieu of a response, you gripped him the back of the neck, bringing him back down and capturing him in a passionate kiss. Joel hissed as you wiggled against him, snapping out of it so that he could hang the backs of your knees over his shoulders. With you folded in half, he pulled back, panting into your mouth as he forced his way inside. Despite the multiple rounds he had treated you with last night, unknowingly fucking you through the first few hours of a heat, there was still a stretch. At that point, having had Joel inside of you more times than you could possibly count, you were pretty sure that you would never get used to the monster that hung below his waistline. 

“Daddy,” you whined, the sting already getting to be too much with just half of his cock inside. 

Joel hushed you, cooing at your teary eyes as he reached down and pinched your clit between his fingers. He rubbed the bud hard, bringing tears to your eyes as sharp jolts of pleasure rocked through your core. It was like any trace of the loving alpha you knew was gone, leaving you with the more brutal version of him that came out when he was in a rut. 

“I think those assholes would like watching you get fucked by me. Shi-it - yeah, bet they’d stare at this perfect little pussy getting torn apart by me and wish it was their cock instead of mine. But you wouldn’t let them, would you darling?,” Joel teased, the tip of his length finally brushing up against your cervix with one final shove. 

With Joel looming over you, forcing your knees to frame your head against the steps, his cock was deeper than you had ever felt it. He was all encompassing, his length buried in such a way that every slight movement caused him to brush against one of the most devastatingly perfect spots inside, meanwhile the proximity of his face had butterflies fluttering in your already stuffed tummy. 

Joel’s face was so close that you could see all of the wrinkles and faded scars. Some were older, while others had been acquired in your time together, but they were all beautiful. The pronounced shape of his nose made you swoon, along with the way he had shaved his face just the way he knew you liked it. It was easy for you to drown out everything as you looked into his eyes, so much so that you didn’t realize your fatal error until one of Joel’s hands suddenly wrapped around your throat. 

“Oh, so maybe you do want them to touch daddy’s pussy, hm? Is that it? Have I not fucked you good enough?,” Joel growled, his rut clearly behind the wheel as he let his possessive side show, “Maybe I gotta find some toys, keep ya tied up and let them do the work f’me until I can come home to fuck some sense into you.” 

The idea of it was so hot that your eyes rolled into the back of your head, slick gushing out of your core so steadily that you could see it dripping down the steps. Although you had no problem with Joel’s filthy proposal, that would have to wait for another day, as your heat called for nothing inside of you except for his thick knot. Swallowing hard around his grip, you sucked in a shaky breath and attempted to respond. 

“N-No, don’t want anyone else,” you cried, tears dripping down and wetting the palm against your neck, “My pussy is yours, she’s yours just please, I need you to do something daddy. I only want y-you to fuck me, need it so bad.” 

He hummed, “Is that right sweetheart? Why should I believe ya?”

Like it had once before, Joel’s rut had brought out something mean inside of him. Even though his cock was throbbing wildly, wedged inside the tight embrace of your walls, he would rather toy with his prey than devour it. He was maddening, he was cruel, and he was also exactly what you needed. In an instant, all of your walls came down, causing you to thrash around and whine for him shamelessly. The desperate movements you made caused his hand to slide off your neck, which gave you enough air to divulge into a litany of pleas. 

“Please! M’good, I can be so good for you daddy. Believe me - fuck, shit - I love you, not them. I’d never let ANY of them touch me - I only want you! I’ve only ever wanted you Joel. Please, I- ohfuckthankyoudaddyshiit -”

Joel didn’t let you finish, your garbled plea cut off by him yanking his cock out and slamming it back in so hard that his balls audibly slapped against your ass. He didn’t give you a chance to think, a chance to breathe, before he started tearing into you. Each violent thrust sent you flying higher and higher, his speed only doubling down each time you let out a choked whine. While Joel slammed into you so hard that the wet smack of your sopping pussy could be heard throughout the house, he snuck his hand up to grip your neck again, squeezing the sides of it so deliciously that you would have screamed if you could. He controlled not only your breaths but also your vision like this, his eyes burning a hole through yours as he forced you to watch him. 

There was a part of you that wanted to look away, to shake him off so that you could get a second of reprieve, but you were hypnotized. Joel’s eyes were so expressive that you had no choice than to stare back. Lust, love, devotion, and unfiltered pleasure flickered across the brown pools, each fleeting expression speaking to your very soul. It left you completely helpless, nothing but a vessel for him to thrust his cock into and play with whenever he saw fit. For the man that beat your cervix into submission, lightly halting your breaths as he rubbed your clit, you would do absolutely anything. You were completely gone, so addicted to him that you didn’t care if everyone in Jackson walked in at that very moment, you knew Joel would keep going regardless. 

“Aw honey, is this too much for her already?,” Joel cooed, tightening his hold on your throat so you couldn’t respond, “Can feel that little cunt getting tighter, is she gonna cum for me baby? Is daddy gonna make her cry?” 

Nodding vehemently, you yanked viciously at Joel’s graying curls until he was right where you wanted him. Perhaps it was greedy to ask for more, but even through the thick fog of heat you knew that this was something he would not refuse. He groaned at the mere suggestion, pace faltering for a few thrusts as his hot breath fanned out over your breasts. You were so close, with your legs shaking and your core growing tighter by the second, but you needed one last push. With how sensitive they were, you were pretty sure that if Joel so much as kissed your nipple, you’d lose it. 

“Shi-it, you’re fucking perfect f’me babygirl,” Joel groaned, leaning forward to suck one of the swollen peaks into his mouth. 

A gasp escaped your mouth, followed by a litany of swears that were silenced by his thumb and index finger pressing against the sides of your neck. Being as experienced as Joel was, he was smart enough not to crush your precious windpipe, opting instead to dizzy you as he cut off the flow of blood to your brain while he pounded into you even harder. It left you a breathless, convulsing mess, your pussy choking him as you let him take you higher and higher. He bit down hard on your nipples, worrying them hard beneath his teeth and happily licking up the beads of sweet milk that spurted out. 

“C’mon honey, feel you - shit - feel you holding it back. Let go baby, cum f’me. Need to feel you milk my cock, gonna knot ya soon I promise,” Joel murmured, dispersing wet kisses along your chest between harsh bites. 

One last bite to your nipple, accompanied by a brutal thrust and a sinful circle over your clit, ripped the orgasm straight from your core. Joel let go of your throat, giving you just enough oxygen to scream as pleasure overrode all of your senses. Slick sprayed out of your core, drenching both him and the staircase below as you came. He kept at it as you dissolved into a puddle of desire, babbling at him as you tore at his hair and scratched his arms. 

“That’s it, that’s it, good fucking girl baby. God, you feel so good like this. Cumming around my cock like a slut - SHIT - but you’re my fucking slut. Gonna fuck you so hard tonight honey, gonna make it so you never forget whose pussy this is, gonna - ohmygod - gonna give you my knot until it takes,” Joel rambled, his pace growing wild and uncordinated as he did. 

The idea of Joel fucking another kid into you was, much to the dismay of your future self, an extremely enticing one. He was full of raw energy as he doubled down on his thrusts, chasing his own high with a brutality that numbed all thoughts and made your legs violently shake. Even though you had already came, he was already so close to making you cum again, each brutal slide home forcing a pitiful cry from your lips. 

“G-Gonna cum again Joel, want you to - ah - want you to cum inside. Please daddy, alpha, fuck, need you to make it better. It hurts so bad, n-need your knot in my pussy,” you begged with hot tears pouring down your face. 

“Fuck honey, already? God, you’re so perfect, such a good fucking girl. Gonna - shi-it - gonna choke my cock again before I knot you? Good, fucking cum then,” Joel hissed. 

With his incessant thrusts continuing to fuck you senseless, Joel squeezed your clit between his fingers again, leaning down to sink his teeth into your neck as he reared back and slapped the bud hard. The pain shot through your entire body, followed by a wave of pleasure that was even more devastating than the last. With each tight pulse around his cock, you brought him closer to the edge, until one final pull on his hair forced him to shove his knot inside. 

Joel moaned wantonly as he came, calling out your name in a way that prolonged your own high. With your bodies moving in sync as you both thrummed with pleasure, Joel grinded up against you, trying to wring as much pleasure from the release that he could. He was insatiable, stopping only when you were too worn out to take it anymore. With the heat now glowing hot in your belly and his rut at full force, you knew that this was just the first of what would be many rounds. Although his thick ropes of hot cum had soothed the ache for now, it would be back in full swing in no time. 

“Oh fuck baby, holy shit,” Joel panted, blanketing himself over you in a way that was stifling. 

You nodded, still too out of it to respond. It didn’t help that Joel had your ankles up around your head, ensuring that you would be out of breath no matter how much oxygen you gulped down. With his cock plugged deep inside, calming that fire that had burned bright since that morning, you didn’t care enough about air to tell him. As far as you were concerned, you’d let Joel strangle you into a short coma if it meant that you could cum that hard again. And that wasn’t even the heat talking, your alpha was just that good. 

“Shit, hang on,” Joel said suddenly, his voice full of concern as he pulled away. 

Carefully, Joel eased your legs off of his shoulders and wrapped them around his waist, finally allowing you to breathe regularly again. After a few deep breaths, the thick haze that had settled over your mind dissipated and you blinked up at him. His gaze mirrored yours, the two of you so in love that it was like nobody else existed. It was just you and him for eternity, locked together in the most primal of ways as the world passed by. Who cared about the rest of Jackson? All that mattered was your mate. 

“I love you,” you whispered, which caused him to smile in return.  

“I love you too honey, so much,” Joel chuckled. 

The warm glow that had settled over you only burned brighter at the admission, until you were both smiling at each other like maniacs. In the days to come, they could try what they must to oust you and Joel, but the two of you would survive it. As crazy as it sounded, you were suddenly so sure of the future that you wanted to sprint down the street and scream it to the rest of the town, to dare them to do anything to stop it. 

“You ain’t leaving me honey, I won’t let ya go that easy,” Joel mumbled.  

His voice had taken a more serious tone as he brought up the confession you had made and you sighed at the painful reminder. 

“Joel, you have to believe me; I didn’t want to say any of that but I needed to keep our pups safe. And if that meant -,” you stopped, unable to even finish the thought with how riled up the heat made you. 

Joel growled at that, as if he could somehow scare off the grief you felt at the thought of leaving the twins behind. He placed a kiss against your lips, proceeding to lay a smattering across every inch of your face until the sting faded to the background. It was incredibly hard to stay grumpy with such a doting mate, especially as he muddied your mind one peck at a time. He worked his way down your jaw, kissing and nipping the skin until your hips jumped beneath him. 

“I understand sweet girl, I do,” Joel promised, continuing to move down the side of your neck, “But I need you to understand that I meant what I said baby, if you leave my ass here alone, I will follow you to the ends of the earth and drag you back home screaming if I have to.”

“You can’t leave our pups all alone here Joel,” you reminded him, although the shakiness in your voice made the protest fall short. 

Joel snorted, “D’ya think that any of your family would be cool with you just up and vanishing? I ain’t gonna be the only one pissed off sweetheart. M’sure that I can find a babysitter no problem so I can track you down and punish ya properly.”  

With that, Joel bit down against your gland, forcing you to cry out as more dopamine and oxytocin raced through your body. Clenching around him hard, you squealed as the bite forced one last pitiful orgasm from your overstimulated pussy. Joel groaned against the crook of your neck, unable to stop himself from stirring his still inflated knot lodged in your pussy to keep you flying high for just a second longer. It was overwhelming for the both of you, but especially him. You saw it in his pained grimace and yet, Joel didn’t stop until you relaxed back against the staircase after one last pitiful twitch. 

“Say that you won’t,” he softly begged when you came down, the desperation in his gravelly voice pulling you from the fog once more. 

“Joel,” you cooed, the sight of the fear in his eyes piercing through your heart. 

Though it had not been your intention to terrify Joel, you clearly had, as he looked like he was close to barring the windows and chaining you to the bed if you seemed even the least bit flighty. His rut was making the fear worse, which made you slightly nervous for the brutal poundings you were undoubtedly set to receive in the days to come, but you needed to quell the fear that ran wild through his nervous system before he broke down. It was a duty that had been ingrained in your very being from the moment Joel had sealed the bond between you. Hell, the need to soothe him had probably existed for longer than that, like from the moment you had first encountered the smell of bergamot and sandalwood along the riverside miles away. 

“I won’t leave you Joel and I promise that I never even wanted to. It killed me to say that, but I thought there was no other way. You’re just such a good dad, I thought it would be better for it to be you to stay with them. They love you so much,” you tried to explain. 

The admission was enough to smooth some of the creased lines along his forehead, while a few new ones formed. Out of nowhere, Joel cupped your face in both hands, kissing you with an unbridled passion that had you curling your toes. He pulled back when you were thoroughly winded and knocked his forehead against yours, giving you no other choice than to be consumed by him. 

“Thank you for saying that honey, but if I’m a good dad to those two, it’s only because I have you by my side. Sure, I might’ve raised one pup by myself, but I ain’t as spry as I was in the 90s. Plus, the twins are something else. Pretty sure my back would give out after a week,” Joel joked. 

You laughed, “Shit, you’re right. My bad, I forgot their dad was a senior citizen.” 

He joined you in laughter, shaking his head at your jab about his age. Watching Joel laugh made warm tingles of unadulterated joy fire across each nerve ending, until you felt almost stoned as you gazed up at him. He caught his breath for a second, sighing as he returned to his serious demeanor. As you waited for Joel to say what he was working on, you thumbed through his facial hair, admiring the salt and pepper mustache above his upper lip that you made him promise to never shave off. 

“I need you in this with me sweetheart. Whatever happens, we have to stick together, okay? I’ve lost too much in this lifetime, I can’t lose anymore. I need you, I need our pups - fuck honey - I need our family. You can’t leave,” Joel said seriously, leaving little room for discussion. 

“Our family stays together, no matter what,” you softly agreed. 

With the promise sealed, Joel leaned down and captured your lips again, which kick started yet another round against the stairs. The coming months would unfurl as they would, like usual, but you knew that everything would be fine because you had each other. The two of you reminded each other of that fact incessantly throughout the next four days, locked inside as he pulled you into round after round of ecstasy, until your belly was bloated with the torrents of cum he had pumped inside. And when the day came where the heat had finally dissipated, fucked out of you dutifully by the love of your life, the two of you were ready to face whatever may come. 

Instead of letting the fear Joel was accustomed to take hold, he had grabbed your hand, kissing the back of it before he led you towards the rest of your lives. The future would be brighter than your pasts, it had to be. The heartbreak and grief you were both accustomed to was gone, never to return again. You were no longer alone and neither was he. To have Joel, to have your pups, to be completely surrounded by the type of love you had dreamed of during a life filled with endless sorrow, it would be enough. 

It already was. 

A/N:

Hey! I just wanted to say, thank you guys for following this story straight through to the end. As you can see from the masterlist, I have made room for the epilogue I'm creating. This will jump forward to check in on reader and Joel 4 years later.

As I've said before, this was my first try at writing a fanfic and I thank you all for bearing with me. I know that this story isn't perfect, but it has been a lot of fun and has given me the confidence to branch out. I already have a small list of other fics that I plan to write and that is because of you guys! That being said, I'm always open to requests and would be more than happy to check in on these two whenever you guys want :)

[indigosabyss]

so the story of nanbaka pre-canon is... fucking insane. and given that some details were obviously not fleshed out at the beginning, I'll try to boil down the important bits:

(Obvious nanbaka spoilers under cut)

Rokudo is several hundred years old, awakening togabito without a care.

One of the people he turned into togabito is Mutsuki Mashiro (aka the Man With The Scar), granting him the ability to transfer thoughts and memories.

Mashiro became obsessed with the potential of togabito, envisioning a world where they reigned supreme.

He extended his life by creating a clone of himself and transferring all his mind into them, and then repeating the process once the clone has aged too much.

This process is repeated at minimum 115 times.

In his extended life, Mashiro gathers more togabito into the organization Shiki, and carries out experiments.

Also in this time, he has a daughter somehow called Touko.

This daughter grew up, fell pregnant after some sort of tryst with Rokudo, and then died mid-pregnancy

Mashiro (being a very normal guy) decides to clone Touko and implant memories and sensations to rebuild her to the exact state she was in before she died, with the goal of getting Rokudo's kid

This experiment failed fourteen times

Simultaneously, one of the clones Mashiro is using to extend his life has become an anomaly.

Clone Number 116 becomes the first Mashiro Clone to have an ability different from Mashiro's. He can create handcuffs and chains.

Because of this anomaly, Mashiro doesn't take over C#116, instead saving him for further research.

The fifteenth version of Touko is introduced to C#116, who gives him the name Hiiro.

She tells Hiiro that she loves him. He specifically calls the love between them romantic. (Yes, yes, I know)

Touko dies. On this fifteenth attempt, her son survives. (This our main character)

For the first six years, Number Fifteen is raised by Hiiro, who was entrusted with his care by Mashiro

Isou (the Shiki doctor) experiments on Number Fifteen, gathering data on his development and powers

By the age of six, Number Fifteen still can't speak.

A more pressing concern is that Number Fifteen's arms have a tendency to fall off. His body is constantly falling apart due to him not having any attachment to his body.

Number Fifteen is an empty container in the shape of a human; unable to recognize that he is alive.

Because he has as much attachment to his own body as he does with a random wall, he can also assimilate random walls into his "body", hence allowing him to listen in on Mashiro, and to share that with Hiiro.

Isou and Mashiro are disappointed with the lack of data from Number Fifteen, and consider storing him away and trying to clone Touko a sixteenth time.

Hiiro is reeling from the shock of Touko's replicability. In the panic, he yanks Number Fifteen at a force that would regularly have his leg come off.

However, the leg remains sturdy.

One of Hiiro's shackles have latched onto Number Fifteen's ankle, and held it together, giving the skin a better complexion.

Hiiro places Jyugo's thick black shackles around his ankles, wrists, and neck. This results in suppressing his ability and granting him awareness. His first words are: "Who are you?"

(Also. This all might have been happening in the window of time between World War One and Two???? But maybe they're just ignorant of world events w how old they are)

Mashiro creates Elf, a togabito capable of curing any disease, while also seizing control of the target's body by replacing all its cells.

Elf cells are injected into Jyugo, with the intention of taking him over.

Mashiro reveals that Hiiro's ability changing to suppress abilities means that Jyugo has the secondary ability to mutate other togabito's abilities; and he wishes to research this.

He also wants Elf to try and break down Hiiro's shackles from the inside of Jyugo's body.

Hiiro runs away with Jyugo

Mashiro vows to find them.

Hiiro goes on to form Kaazu, an international organization in charge of managing prisons.

This is to promote the incarceration of togabito, to then channel them from all prisons into one maximum security prison called Nanba Prison, to kill the creatures that Mashiro held to such high regard

Shiki starts to target unusual people in prisons, too, taking advantage of the disenfranchisement of felons like Hiiro is doing too.

At some point, Jyugo meets Nico, Uno, and Rock for the first time. This encounter ends with his death(?)

Hiiro crafts Nanba to be as interesting and amazing as the real world for Jyugo.

To put off the progress of Elf working through Jyugo's body, Hiiro wipes his memories. This is done multiple times over, with the help of Nishimiya.

He recruits Jyugo's near-killers into supporting him as they went through prisons, until they're finally transferred to Nanba.

Rokudo is still wandering around, now guarded by a Shiki bodyguard.

And from there the manga starts!!

[deobienthusiast]

like a moth to a flame | ljy

• pairing: royal guard!juyeon x gn!reader

• word count: 11.2k words (so fucking proud of myself)

• genre: forbidden love!au, royal!au, angst, fluff

• warnings: brief mentions of nudity, implied sexual themes without actually mentioning it, suggestive, mentions of death (there’s a few descriptive death parts and descriptive injury parts), blood, dead bodies

• synopsis: after falling for the one of the royal guards your family has hired, you now face the dilemma of worrying about his safety without giving away your relationship

• notes: no lie, my expectations for this fic weren’t very high, but when i finished it i bawled like a baby because of how proud i was for finishing it and how proud i was of it. this has to be probably my best fic yet, so i hope you guys really really enjoy it!!!! banner is by @sungbeam ILY THANK YOU SO MUCH🥹🥹

• tagging: @deoboyznet @userjuyo @cloverdaisies @hongyangi @juyeonszn @sureogi @kimsohn @invuwrld (let me know if you want to be apart of a tag list for a certain member OR be tagged for any tbz fics)

Life had a funny way of placing people in front of you so they could become a part of your life. You always wondered, if you were out on your own and living a very different life than the one you live, just how you would meet the same people who were already present within your young adolescent years. Being the child of a king seemed like the life everyone would want. However, when you peek upon the lives of the common who live normally without an impending threat constantly over their heads, you get jealous. They live with such ease, with no cares in the world. You live with a constant fear of your castle doors being broken down, and someone wreaking havoc on your family. That was until your father hired new royal guards.

They were all relatively tall. Some being your height, while others just towered right over you. Three were on the younger side, four of them being your age, and four being older than you. You grew close to the ones who were your age. You grew close to the younger ones as well. They were a bit more childish, so they were kept more so in the castle as to not provide any unwarranted attention. The four eldest were the main ones that were sent out on missions, coming back beaten, bruised, and bloodied. But finishing their job, nonetheless. The eleven guards took care of business when it needed to be dealt with. There was one that stood out to you, though.

When these guards stepped through the castle doors, your curiosity got the best of you. You usually don’t dabble in your father’s affairs. Too worried you’ll hear something that you don’t want to. However, when these men stepped out of his chambers, you couldn’t help but lock eyes with one. He stopped almost immediately, his cat-like eyes dragging you in as his colleagues moved from around him to head to their respective posts. He gave you a bow and a small smile as his long legs took strides to put him right in front of you.

Holding out his large hand, you gently placed your smaller one in his. This allowed him to bring your hand to his lips where he left the softest brush of a kiss upon your knuckles.

“Your highness,” He said softly.

And that was how you met Juyeon. The royal guard who had stolen your heart, and you his. From that point on, you two were inseparable, having to hide your relationship due to the nature of his job. He was forbidden to be with a member of the royal family, but even he couldn’t lie. You were so captivating. Juyeon had never met anyone like you in his life. The way you move so elegantly and swiftly. How you had a multitude of people in the castle wrapped around your pretty little finger (him included). Juyeon was so in love with you that it scared him. Keeping your relationship a secret was hard for the boy. Especially considering he was now to a point where he’d leave with the older guards for missions, which meant leaving your safety in the hands of the three youngest who he knew had massive crushes on you (Sunwoo, especially). Juyeon wanted you for himself. He didn’t like to share, especially not with his members. And you were too special to him, too precious for your safety to be left in the hands of anyone but himself. Of course his members weren’t idiots. In fact, the younger ones were the first to find out about the two of you and spread it to the rest of the crew. This led to Juyeon getting a stern talking to from the oldest, Sangyeon, explaining to him the dangers of falling for a member of the royal family and the harm it could put him in if anyone besides them found out. Juyeon didn’t care, and quite frankly, neither did you.

That’s how two of the older members, Hyunjae and Jacob, found you two in your room with nothing but the royal cotton sheets covering your bodies that were wrapped around each other.

“Seriously?!” Hyunjae said incredulously. “What is wrong with the two of you?”

Jacob walked towards the side of the bed Juyeon lay on as he grabbed his uniform, tossing it to the boy.

“Change! Before Sangyeon realizes you’ve left your post outside the bedroom door.” Jacob said, emphasizing the “outside”.

Juyeon chuckled, rolling over just slightly to softly peck your lips as he sat up, leaving enough slack in the sheets so you could cover yourself.

“I’m not changing in front of you guys.” Juyeon gestured to the two boys.

Hyunjae scoffed. “But you’ll change in front of,”

“Got it! You’ve got three minutes.” Jacob cut off the boy as he pushed him to the door.

He cracked it slightly, checking to see if anyone was outside, making you all hold your breath. He turned to you all, nodding slightly as he and Hyunjae exited before repeating. “Three minutes, Juyeon.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle. Despite knowing the danger Juyeon was putting himself in, you knew they would never tell Juyeon to stop seeing you. Especially since you made him the happiest he’s ever been since he became a royal guard. At least that’s what Hyunjae had told you.

Juyeon waited for the door to close completely before grabbing his boxers from the floor. Sliding them over his legs to cover his bare bottom half, he stood up, turning around to stare at you.

“What?” You said softly.

He just shook his head with a shrug. “You’re just so beautiful.”

Rolling your eyes, knowing how completely ravaged you look because of him, you just nod. “Yeah, you definitely need to get back to your post.”

Juyeon laughed, his hair bouncing with every movement of his head. You grabbed the night clothes the tall man had rid you of when he snuck into your room, slipping them on as you got up to help Juyeon with his uniform. His pants and boots went on without any struggle, but getting his top fastened down enough to cover the marks you left on him seemed to be a bit more of a challenge. Feeling a little guilty, knowing he could get in trouble, you mumbled out an apology.

“I guess I got carried away.” You spoke sheepishly.

He looked at you through the floor length mirror, having finally found a way to cover everything as he smiled.

“Don’t be. They let me know that I’m doing my job correctly.”

Now that was corny, but you couldn’t deny the way a heat creeped up your neck at his words.

As the last button on his top got fastened, a knock sounded on the door.

“Sangyeon is looking for you.” Jacob’s muffled voice said.

Juyeon let out a sigh as he walked over to you, grabbing your hand to bring to his lips just like he did the first day he met you.

“I love you. I’ll see you in the morning after our briefing with your father.”

You could only nod, too captivated by his voice to truly understand what was coming out. Juyeon kissed your forehead this time before moving to the door, throwing a wink to you from over his shoulder as he got out just in time. You laid your ear to the door as you could hear a pair of heavy-footed boots make their way to your door.

“Please tell me you weren’t doing what I think you were?” You heard Sangyeon ask him.

Juyeon replied. “I was just checking in. Making sure everything was okay. I swear.”

From the other side of the door, Sangyeon gave the younger boy a look. “You’re playing with fire Juyeon.”

Juyeon could only nod as Sangyeon walked back to his post, finishing his rounds of checking on each guard. You sighed, allowing your feet to drag you to the now empty king bed that felt too big for one person.

You fell asleep easier than you had expected, waking to a knock at your door. You groaned slightly as the door opened, your right hand coming in to greet you.

“Good morning, your highness. You must get dressed immediately. Your father has summoned everyone to the ballroom for a meeting. He says it’s urgent.” The girl tells you.

You nod, thanking the girl softly as she lays your clothes out on your bed. She exits, leaving you to get dressed as you frown. A meeting that involved everyone in the castle was never a good thing, and suddenly a feeling of nausea passed over you. Did someone find out about you and Juyeon? Is that what this was about? Your thoughts made you dress quickly as you fixed your hair, rushing to the bathroom to brush your teeth. You opened your bedroom door, meeting the back of a head belonging to a rather tall man. You felt yourself relax as you lifted your hand to tap his shoulder before they turned. Your hand retracted immediately as your eyes widened slightly.

“Younghoon, what are you doing over here?” You asked.

The older members watched over the more senior members of the family so seeing one of them posted outside your door worried you to no end.

“I’m just here to escort you to your parents' chambers. The queen and your sister are waiting for you.” Younghoon told you.

You nodded, following the boy through the long corridor. He stopped in front of the door, looking around first before opening it. You furrowed your eyebrows, walking in the room as he closed the door behind you. Your mother looked at you, giving you a small smile.

“Mother, what is happening?” You asked quietly.

She sighed. “Your father is briefing the guards. It’s important that we wait here.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Why was Younghoon posted outside my door? He only does that if there is impending danger.”

Your mother made your sister comfortable on the bed as she stood up. She gently grabbed your arm, pulling you off to the side as she spoke in a hushed tone.

“There’s been some talk,” She starts.

“Talk?”

“They think someone is after your father and I.”

You swallowed. “Which means they’ll also come for her and I?”

You raised a hand to point between yourself and your sister. The action made your mother nod as a knock was put to the door. You jumped slightly as someone spoke.

“Your majesty,” Sangyeon’s voice said just loud enough to make it through the door. “You can come out now.”

You opened the door, coming face to face with the senior guard who gave you a small smile.

“Your highness,” He said with a bow. “The King is looking for you.”

You nodded, thanking the older boy as you gave your mother a kiss on the cheek. You quickly left the room, walking down the hallway towards the ballroom. You noticed Sunwoo and Eric, the two youngest guards, conversing outside the door. They both were having a very hushed, secretive conversation as you walked up to them. You got your hand onto the gold gilded handle of the ballroom door before Eric stopped you.

“Your highness, you can’t go in yet.” The youngest guard said.

“Why?”

“The King is briefing the guards.”

You rolled your eyes. “So why aren’t you two in there?”

Sunwoo spoke this time. “They are being sent on a mission.”

You turned to the boy. “What mission?”

Sunwoo and Eric turned to look at each other, almost as if to silently ask the other if they should tell you. Eric shoved the boy slightly, making Sunwoo whine before he spoke.

“There’s a threat to the kingdom. To your parents and you and your sister. We know the source of the threat and your father is sending the more senior guards out to neutralize the situation.” Sunwoo said.

You nodded, letting out a calm breath. “So, no Juyeon. He’s not going?”

This time Sunwoo was quick to shove Eric, knowing how you got about Juyeon going on missions.

“Uh, well…not exactly.”

Before you could reply the door opened. Your father looked between you and the younger guards before speaking to them.

“Shouldn’t you be at your posts?” He asked as the two younger boys nodded quickly, heading off to their respective posts.

He pulled you into the ballroom where the rest of the guards, more specifically your guard, were gathered around. Juyeon lifted his head, his hair falling into his eyes as he watched your father walk you into the ballroom.

“Gentleman, this mission is important. You need to take great caution in your posts and each move you make. You have to remember who you’re out there protecting. Most importantly, remember that you are out there protecting each other. This threat is serious, and I do not expect you back until it’s completely dissolved,”

You started to drown out your father’s words as you made eye contact with Juyeon. He gave you a sad smile as you looked over who all was with him. Juyeon, Hyunjae, Jacob, Changmin, and Kevin. You knew Sangyeon would be leading the troops and Younghoon would be up there as well. The other older guard, Chanhee, never went on missions unless absolutely needed. Your sister had taken a liking to him the moment they were hired so he stayed to help your mother. You knew Juyeon never went on missions either for the same reason, in fact he, Changmin, or Kevin rarely went away. The severity of the situation was beginning to set in as you excused yourself, feeling a set of eyes on you as you left the room.

You felt sick knowing that Juyeon would be sent out on a mission that clearly was more dangerous than people were letting on about. You headed for the green house, dismissing any staff that was in the building to care for the flowers as you took in deep breaths, trying to steady your rapidly beating heart. Soft footsteps built up behind you as you closed your eyes, speaking just as softly.

“Juyeon, you’re going to get hurt.”

Large hands wrapped around your waist, pulling you close enough so he could place a soft kiss on your temple.

“Let’s not think about that.” He whispered.

You scoffed, turning yourself around. “How can I not? My father is sending you out with the senior guards to neutralize a threat and you want me to not think about it?”

Juyeon sighed. “I couldn’t tell him no. I would’ve been dismissed.”

“At least then you’d still have your life.” You countered, pushing away from him.

“Then what do you want me to do,” Juyeon says, frustration laced through his words. “You tell me what you want me to do! This is my job. We both knew something like this would arise. Let’s not act surprised. I’m a royal guard, and if I get sent on a mission by order then that’s what I have to do. I could lose everything if I say no.”

Tears built up in your eyes as you raised your voice with the tall guard. “And what about me? What if I lose you?”

Juyeon’s face softened at your words, the frustration melting away.

“Baby,” He spoke, barely above a whisper, as he stepped towards you. “You’re never going to lose me, ever. I’m yours. I’m always going to gravitate towards you no matter how far apart we are.”

His hands cupped your face, forcing you to look at him as his thumbs gently wiped at the tears staining your skin.

“Don’t ever think I’m not going to come back to you. I’m going to be the first one back so I can see you, touch you, hold you, kiss you,” Juyeon pauses, placing a tender kiss to your lips. “I’m not leaving you. Like a moth to a flame.”

You could only nod, mind still reeling with the idea of Juyeon never coming back from his mission. Despite your father having no knowledge of your relationship with one of his best royal guards, you were positive you’d never be able to forgive him if something happened to Juyeon. The boy watched you intently, seeing the gears in your head turning at capacity.

“What are you thinking about?” He asked.

Finally pulling yourself from your thoughts, you spoke. “When do you leave?”

“Before sundown.”

With a nod of your head, you pulled both his hands from your face, squeezing them gently. “Please, don’t do anything stupid. Listen to Sangyeon. And if it gets too heavy, fall back.”

“Love, those weren’t the king's orders.” The guard answered.

You scoffed, with a roll of your eyes. “No, they’re mine. And if you love me, you’ll follow them.”

This time you watched Juyeon intently as a small smile made its way to his face. “Of course I will. Because I do love you.”

“I love you, too.”

You and Juyeon pulled apart, but not before leaving a last kiss to each other’s lips. You knew the boy had to pack for the journey, and he would get in trouble if he wasn’t with the rest of the squad. Juyeon kept a hold on your hand as he backed away.

“I’m going to come back.” He tells you.

You smiled. “Promise?”

A nod and smile was thrown back to you. “With all my heart.”

You watched the boy exit the greenhouse as you mentally prepared yourself for the coming days that were sure to be Juyeon-less. You watched from your bedroom balcony as your father sent the guards off into the sunset, not having the stomach to stand with your mother and sister as he sent the men into what might be their early deaths. Juyeon watched you the entire time, giving you a small smile and mouthing the same promise he made just moments ago in the greenhouse.

I’m going to come back.

His words echoed in your head over and over again, pushing you into a sleepless night.

The morning sun peeked through your blinds too quickly for your liking considering you were finally starting to fall asleep. You let out a yawn, pulling yourself from your bed as you heard a faint knock.

When you pull the door open, you came face to face with your mother.

“Mother,” You say, startled by her presence so early in the morning. “Is everything okay?”

She nodded. “I just wanted to check in on you. You seemed upset about something yesterday.”

If only you knew.

“I’m fine. Just wasn’t feeling too well,” You lied. “Have we heard anything from the guards?”

Your mother chuckled. “Sweetheart, it’s too early to hear anything. If anything, the guards will just be getting to their destination. We’re sending Sunwoo out later as our line of communication.”

You let out a breath, hoping for a better answer. “Well, will you let me know if you hear anything?”

Your mother nods. “Of course, my dear. You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you have a thing for one of those guards.”

You could only chuckle nervously as your mother sauntered off, her dress making a ‘swooshing’ sound across the floor of the hallway. You let out the breath you were holding as you leaned up against the large wood door of your bedroom. You closed your eyes, bringing both hands to your head to rub at your temples as someone spoke.

“Any messages you want me to relay to the squad?” Sunwoo’s voice made you jump.

One of your hands was now clutching your chest, right around your heart.

“Dammit, Sunwoo. Announce yourself, please.”

Sunwoo chuckled. “I did. You were in your own world.”

A blush ran up your face as you shoved him, heading towards the front of the castle grounds to see him off. The younger boy caught his footing, catching up to you rather quickly as you spoke again.

“Please, try to keep an eye on Juyeon.” You told him.

Sunwoo pushed open the front doors of the castle, letting in an immense amount of sunlight that casted shadows all over the walls. You walked him to his horse that was waiting for him as he looked at you.

“I’m only a line of communication. I’m not staying.”

You huffed. “Then, tell him…tell him I love him. Please?”

Sunwoo could only smile as he nodded, pulling himself onto the black steed. You always admired Sunwoo’s horse. His being the fastest, and prettiest, made him perfect as a communicator.

Sunwoo pulled the reins slightly, making the horse turn around. His lack of answer made you antsy as you watched him trot off.

“Sunwoo!” You yelled out.

“I’ll tell him!”

The days dragged on after Sunwoo’s departure. You weren’t sure how far out the squad was but considering you were now on day two of no Sunwoo, you kind of figured they were pretty far. The castle was on high alert with the threat and the best guards being out to handle the situation. Juyeon’s words continued to rattle your brain as they were beginning to become the only reason to get you through each day. You checked the front of the castle grounds religiously, even venturing out farther than allowed, making your right hand drag you back onto the grounds.

“Your highness, we mustn’t go past the gates. It's too dangerous.” She said softly, looping her arm through yours to walk you back towards the castle. “Don’t worry so much. He’ll be back.”

Your head snapped towards her as you stopped the both of you. “What?”

She giggled. “You aren’t exactly masters at hiding the way you look at each other.”

You let out a groan, bringing your hand to your head. “Jesus, does everyone in this castle know about us?”

She could only laugh. “Not everyone. Obviously his fellow guards found out, but those faded marks on your collarbone,” Her slim finger was pointed towards your upper chest, making you unravel your arm from her as you pulled your garments closer to your neck. “They give it away. Coupled with the fact that he’s usually sporting the same marks.”

You had never been so embarrassed in your life.

“And here I was thinking we were hiding them.”

“Don’t worry your highness. I won’t tell anyone. Juyeon makes you happy. That’s all that matters to me.” She told you.

You smiled at her, relooping your arms. “Okay then. What about you? Anyone interesting in your life?”

She stopped, smiling at the grass beneath her feet as she looked off in the distance. You couldn’t help the smile that tugged at your lips from her reaction to your question. She opened her mouth to speak before gasping, pointing off in the direction you just came from. Whipping around, you heard galloping that was getting continuously louder. You felt a tug as your right hand began to pull you.

“Wait,” You told her.

“Your highness, we don’t know who it is!” She replied quickly.

You pull from her grasp as the horse, Sunwoo’s horse, is now in focus. You let out a sigh of relief, happy to finally have some sort of news before seeing the state of the horse and the boy on it. Both were cut up and bleeding with Sunwoo looking like he might all but fall off the horse if it wasn’t for someone tying him on him. You stopped the horse, reaching up for Sunwoo.

“My sword,” He wheezed out. “Cut the ropes.”

You turned to your right hand. “Go get help!”

She nodded as you grabbed the sword that was strapped to his side, using the blade to cut the ropes on both sides, cutting your hand in the process. You try to (gently) pull Sunwoo from his horse, causing the boy to topple off onto the grass. He lets out a loud scream of pain as you kneel next to him.

“Sunwoo, what happened? Who did this?” Your mind was racing with questions.

Sunwoo could barely keep his eyes open, the pain being too much for the boy. “Ambushed. Barely made it out.”

“What happened with everyone else? What happened with Juyeon?”

You were pulled from the boy’s side as your father and Eric tended to him. Your mother pulled you up, keeping your sister and New at a safe distance. More men helped out with Sunwoo as New left your sister with you and your mother to tend to the hurt horse. Your father charged past, leading the way for Sunwoo to be carried back into the castle.

“Is he going to be okay?” You asked your mother.

“I’m not sure.” The queen said.

The castle was quiet as Sunwoo got worked on. All that could be heard were his cries of pain that brought tears to your eyes. They kept around the clock care for him for the next 24 hours as you kept yourself locked in your room. You had so many questions. Who did this? He was just a kid, so why would they hurt him? More importantly, what happened to the rest of them? What happened to Juyeon?

You watched the sun set on another day, now having no line of communication to give you any sort of relief. You felt your eyelids grow heavy as someone knocked on the thick wood doors of your chambers. Jumping slightly, you moved slowly towards the door, not wanting to hear anymore news about anything tonight.

“Eric,” You said surprised. “What are you doing over here?”

Eric spoke in a hushed town. “I had to come this late, so you wouldn’t get caught. Sunwoo is asking for you.”

You nodded, now being fully awake as you let the boy lead you to Sunwoo’s location. He stopped in front of the double doors of an abandoned room where your family basically stored stuff away that was used for balls. He pushed the door open slowly to contain any noises that might come from the old wood. Eric looked around before nodding at you, putting a hand on your lower back to push you into the room. He closed the door behind you to stay posted outside as you let your eyes adjust to the dimly lit room. The only light was coming from the oil lamps lit throughout the room. Sunwoo laid on a cot in the back of the room, his bare torso all wrapped in bandages that were starting to stain from his blood.

Making your way over to the boy, you knelt next to his head as you whispered into the dark room. “Sunwoo,”

The boy’s eyes opened slightly as he squinted before slowly turning his head. He hissed slightly from his own movement as he looked at you. His hair was sticking to his face, sweat lining his entire body. He was starting to come down with a fever.

“Your highness,” He breathed out, just barely pulling sound out of his mouth with his words. You leaned in. “Juyeon,”

You felt your blood run cold. “What? What happened to Juyeon? Is he okay?”

The boy swallowed. “As far as I know, but this situation is more serious than we previously anticipated.”

You stayed quiet, prompting the boy to continue.

“You,” His stomach contracted, making him wince as he moved just slightly. “You need to tell your father.”

A confused look crossed your face before you realized what he was getting at. “Sunwoo, I can’t.”

He gingerly shook his head. “You have to.”

“He could lose everything, Sunwoo.”

This time he snapped his head in your direction, ignoring the pain in a means to get his point across. “And yet you two still are together. If you really care about him, you’ll tell your father.”

His words stung, making you turn from him. “How can you say that? You know how much I care about Juyeon.”

“Then tell him. They are prying information from us out there.” Sunwoo countered.

“What do you mean?”

Sunwoo sighed, taking a deep breath. “They weren’t looking to kill us when I got there. They were looking to kidnap us. Torture us as a way to get information about the king, about you.”

You froze. “Me? Why me?”

Before he could answer, you heard shouting. Standing up quickly, you ran to the door opening it fully to an empty hallway. Eric was nowhere to be found as you closed the door, hearing footsteps rounding the corner. Your right hand came full speed right in front of you, stopping just before crashing into you. You grunted softly as she spoke.

“Your highness, the guards, they’re back!” She said quickly.

Your eyes widened as you took off in the opposite direction from which she came from. Heading towards the front of the castle, you noticed your father and mother already out there. Other staff members surrounded the area, watching your father debrief the guards as you let your legs carry you as fast as they could.

When you got to the front door, you stopped. Your heart beating out of your chest as you pushed the doors open. You started the trek down the stairs before stopping. Your father and mother both turned to you, Sangyeon standing in front of both of them. Your mother made her way to you, walking quickly to your side. It was at this moment, you realized that only Sangyeon and Changmin were back. Both badly beaten and covered in blood that wasn’t their own.

“Sweetheart, you should go back inside.” She said quickly.

Walking past her, you headed straight for Sangyeon who was in deep conversation with your father. He eyed you as you got closer to him, watching your every move.

“Your highness,” He started as you interrupted him.

“Where is he?”

Your father looked between the two of you. “Where is who?”

Sangyeon shook his head. “Don’t do this right now.”

“What are you two talking about?”

This time you shook your head. “No, let’s do this right now. What happened? Where is he?”

Sangyeon looked down at his boots before speaking. “He and the others were taken hostage. Changmin and I, we barely escaped.”

“You left them,” You said softly.

“No.” Sangyeon replied. “No, that’s not true. I needed more help, that’s why I came back. That’s why we came back.

He points between himself and Changmin as he turns back to your father. Not bothering to listen, you walked up to Changmin. He kept his head down as you whispered to him.

“Do you know where they are being kept?” You asked him quietly.

Changmin lifted his head, cuts on his lip and nose becoming visible to you. He nods slowly.

You grab his arm, pulling him towards the castle. “Let’s go.”

Your mother stopped you. “What are you doing?”

“Helping.” You said, not bothering to stop.

Changmin kept in stride with your fast steps as you pulled him into the castle, dragging him down the hallway towards Sunwoo’s room. Sunwoo turned his head as the door opened, trying to lift himself as he immediately recognized the person behind you.

“Hyung,” Sunwoo said. “You’re alive!”

Changmin pushed past you, kneeling before the younger boy as he tended to him. You peered through a partially covered window, seeing your father still talking with Sangyeon. Letting Changmin talk with Sunwoo, you moved around the room, finding a sword and riding gear for yourself. This caught both the boys' attention as Changmin spoke.

“What are you thinking about doing?” Changmin asked softly.

“You’re taking me to Juyeon.”

Changmin stood, looking at you like you were crazy. He watched you move around, gathering everything you needed as he tried to find the right words.

“Your h-highness,” He stammered out. “I really don’t think-,”

“I don’t care what you think! You are the only one that isn’t beaten or bruised to a bloody pulp. Sangyeon sure as hell isn’t going to take me, and my father will never let me go. I’m making this decision on my own. Besides, we need to get the others back.” You stopped, momentarily wondering whether you and Changmin would be enough.

You had no idea what kind of state the others would be in, especially with Sunwoo’s condition and the way Sangyeon and Changmin looked now.

As if reading your mind, Changmin took a step towards you, leaving Sunwoo’s side. “Your highness, there’s no way we can get through. Not two of us.”

You nodded at words, agreeing immediately. “Then we take help.”

Changmin looked on, confused as you headed towards the door. Quickly turning to Sunwoo, he whispered something to him as he jogged after you. The castle was quiet, everyone still in shock of only two of the royal guards returning as they stood outside. You took off towards your sister’s room, Changmin hot on your trail. Your footsteps echoed off the walls, alerting the boy posted outside your sister’s door. He stood before recognizing the boy behind you.

“Q,” Chanhee started, calling out to the boy with a nickname. “You’re back?”

Changmin stopped as did you. “You need to come with us.”

Chanhee looked confused, as you spoke this time. “We need to get the others. My father is going to take his time with Sangyeon, and that’s exactly what the others don’t have. We need all the help we can get.”

The boy cocked his head slightly, knowing the trouble he could get into if he disobeyed the King’s orders. Chanhee sighed, looking back at the doors he was in front of. He had promised your little sister he’d accompany her to breakfast in the morning. Clearly, that wasn’t going to happen.

“What do you need me to do?” Chanhee asked, stepping forward.

As you three hatched out a game plan, the youngest guard rounded the corner. The first thing Eric noticed was the gear you had on.

“What’s going on?” Eric asked.

“We’re going to get the others! Are you in?” You asked very straightforwardly.

Eric thought about it for a split second before giving you a nod of his head. “Let’s take the back gate, though. They’ve moved all the horses back there.”

You all nodded, heading towards the back exit of the castle by the greenhouse. As you quickly and quietly walked down the corridor, you noticed a figure by the door.

“Sunwoo, why are you out of bed?” Changmin asked.

The boy was using the wall to hold himself up as he dragged himself across the wall towards you. He pulled at your belt, unsheathing your sword from its case.

“Take mine.” He said softly, tucking the larger blade into your case with your help.

He pushed his full body weight into the wall, slowly sliding down it as he was now sitting on the floor. You and Changmin helped steady him before he reached up to grasp both of your shoulders and Changmin’s.

“Bring them back. Alive.” He said, barely above a whisper.

Changmin looked from Sunwoo to you as you nodded.

“As long as you stay alive to see them when we get back.” You countered.

A small, sly smile made its way to Sunwoo’s face as he nodded. “I’ll try my best, your highness.”

He let his arms drop as someone yelled. “Hey!”

You called out to Eric and Chanhee as the four of you took off out the doors. Just like Eric had said, four steeds stood by the greenhouse, still saddled up. You all climbed onto a horse, catching a glimpse of the person that yelled.

“Sangyeon,” You whispered to yourself as Changmin got his horse untied.

“Come on! This way!” Changmin yelled.

The hooves of the four horses pounded the ground as Sangyeon ran out of the castle.

“Your highness! Y/N!” Sangyeon screamed.

He continued to yell, but the sound became background noise as you let Changmin lead the way. He went full steam ahead to get out of the castle grounds quickly, only pulling back on the speed when he felt as though you were all in the clear. As you rode through the woods, the cool air whipped through your hair. It was the only thing calming you as you let the decisions you just made wash over you. Feeling an impending wave of anxiety creep up, you started to get nervous.

“Let’s slow up right here.” Changmin said softly.

You were the last person to stop, riding forwards just slightly as Changmin addressed you guys.

“We needed to be prepared. What you guys are about to see, it’s gruesome.”

You all nodded. Changmin continued to explain everything as you tried to keep up with what he was saying. His words started to all blur together as your mind started to wander.

The forest you were in started to change around you, the men in front of you disappearing as you closed your eyes to take in a breath.

“Aren’t you supposed to be meeting the guests?” A familiar voice says from behind you.

You turn quickly, smiling almost immediately. “Juyeon!”

He gives you a smile as you run to him, letting your full body weight crash into the boy. Juyeon grunts, letting his arms encircle your waist. He leans down to place a gentle kiss on your lips, making you hum.

You couldn’t believe he was in front of you right now. You nudge your nose against his, letting your forehead lean into him as he speaks.

“Someone is excited to see me!” A chuckle escaped his lips as he spoke.

You looked up at him. “You’re okay,”

“Yeah, I’m okay. Why wouldn’t I be?” Juyeon asked.

You furrowed your eyebrows at his question. “Well, the threat to the kingdom. You had to neutralize it.”

The guard looked down at you confused. “What threat? No one has threatened the kingdom since we’ve arrived to protect you and your family. Are you sure you are okay?”

Feeling something cool and wet against your skin, you look down. Your hands that were set on each side of his lower chest were now covered in blood. Eyes widening in horror, you jumped back from the boy.

“What’s wrong?” Juyeon asks.

Too scared to speak, you continue to back away from Juyeon.

“Your highness, your highness…”

“Your highness? Your highness!”

You jumped as a pair of hands grabbed a hold of you. You look around you, realizing that you’re still in the forest. You look down at the hands holding you before coming face to face with Changmin. He’s looking at you with grave concern as you speak.

“What happened?”

Changmin looks at the guys behind him before turning back to you. “Your highness, I was explaining what the battlefield we’re about to cross looks like. I had asked you a question, but you kind of went mute on us. Almost like you were trapped in a daze. We couldn’t get you out of it.”

You nodded, trying to find the right words before Eric spoke. “Do you guys hear that?”

You all silenced yourselves, letting the sounds of the rustling leaves make their way into your ears.

“I don’t hear anything.” Chanhee said.

“No, no. Listen. Just listen.” Eric replied.

That’s when you all heard it. The faint sound of pounding? No, galloping.

Changmin pushed himself back, so he was fully sitting on his horse as he whispered. “Everyone hide, now!”

You all split into four different directions as the galloping started to get closer. Someone had followed you, and you had a pretty decent idea of who it was.

“Your highness,” Sangyeon called out. “Changmin!”

You all stayed quiet, the darkness, coupled with the full, large trees helped to hide you.

“I know you guys are out there. You need to come with me back to the castle, now! King’s orders.” Sangyeon said.

The only sound he could make out was the loud rustling of leaves from the strong gusts of wind.

Sangyeon sighed. “Y/N, come on. You took battle training when you were younger, but you know you don’t stand a chance against these enemies.”

His words struck a nerve in you. You knew he was right, but you didn’t want to admit that. You wanted to prove him wrong.

“I’m not heading back to the castle without Juyeon or the others.”

Sangyeon’s head moved in the direction your voice came from as he willed his horse to trot slowly towards the sound. “We’re going to get the others, but you have to give us time.”

You shook your head. “They don’t have time, Sangyeon.”

This time, you pulled yourself out of the thick brush. Pulling your horse behind you. Sangyeon let out a sigh of relief, eyeing you up and down to make sure you weren’t hurt.

He hopped down from his horse and held out his hand. “Come on. Let me take you back home.”

You shook your head. Sangyeon was starting to get frustrated by your stubbornness. He really needed to get you back to the castle, not just you but everyone else. He was the leader, and if he failed, the King would have his head. You, of all people, knew that.

Sangyeon let his hand drop, looking down at his dirty boots as he took in a breath. “Your highness,”

“I’m not going back with you.”

“You have too!” He yelled.

Sangyeon was never someone to raise his voice, so to say you were surprised was an understatement. He took your silence as an opportunity to calm himself before speaking again.

“Your highness, I can get in a lot of trouble if you don’t come back to the castle with me. All of us can.” He said loudly, knowing the others were just as close by as you were.

You shrugged. “Then it looks like you aren’t going back.”

Sangyeon closed his eyes, bringing his gloved hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Why are you being so stubborn?”

“Why are you being so adamant?”

“Because I made a promise.” Sangyeon said.

Promise? What promise?

“A promise to who? My father? If that’s the case, it’s broken.” You told him.

He shook his head. “A promise to Juyeon.”

He let his head drop as he closed his eyes. “When we got separated, he made me swear to take care of you, keep you safe. Y/N, he sacrificed himself for us. For Changmin and I. The two of us, we had the chance to leave, and we were going to give it up to help the others.”

“But Juyeon didn’t let you.” You finished for him.

Sangyeon could only nod. It made sense. Juyeon was nothing if not noble. He was willing to die for you and his brothers. You closed your eyes, smiling slightly. Even when he wasn’t around he was finding ways to keep you out of harm's way.

“I have to keep you safe.”

You nodded, calling out to the rest of the guys.

Eric peeked out from your left, as Changmin and Chanhee came from the other side of the pathway. Sangyeon looked at the three boys before chuckling slightly.

You took a step towards Sangyeon, your hand tightening on the reins of your horse as you spoke. “I still can’t go back with you.”

Sangyeon went to protest before you interrupted him. “Sangyeon, come with us. You are the best in hand to hand combat.”

The guards with you nodded enthusiastically, trying to convince their leader to join them, knowing his strength would be greatly appreciated.

Sangyeon shook his head. “I can’t, and you know that. I need to keep you safe. I need to get you back to the castle.”

“You really want to keep me safe and keep your promise to Juyeon, then you’ll come with us. You never break promises, and you know you won’t go back to the castle if I’m not with you. My father would have your head.”

Sangyeon let out a frustrated sigh as he looked at the hopeful faces of his members. He turned back to you as you cocked an eyebrow at him, crossing your arms over his chest. If the situation wasn’t so dire, Sangyeon wouldn’t help but laugh at the way you look. He was convinced that you had never looked more like your father. You were going to make a great ruler, that’s for sure.

“Alright look, if I come, and that’s a big if, you need to listen to me. All of you.” Sangyeon said, moving his body to point at every one of you. “We need to stick together, and not lose our heads. These guys, they are tough. Now we’ve taken out a majority of them, but the few that are left have the guys locked away in their own bunker. Once we locate it, we need to work specifically on freeing the guys, not fighting. Understood?”

Everyone nodded as Sangyeon helped you onto your horse, handing you reins he had slipped from your hand. As you got comfortable, he spoke again.

“Changmin, lead the way.” The older boy said as Changmin hopped onto his horse. The other two boys sprung into action, following along as you guys picked back up. Sangyeon kept an eye out, looking around carefully as you made your way out of the forest and through the plethora of bodies.

You never doubted your father when it came to picking people who could keep the kingdom safe, and now you had to make sure to thank him if you ever saw him again. The wasteland of death that you were walking through made you appreciate sitting in the castle all day long and being roped into stupid balls and useless meetings. The scene in front of you was nothing short of something out of a horror movie. Sangyeon had taken the lead off Changmin and was keeping you guys at a steady pace, looking over the bodies on the ground.

“Watch out for supplies or clues. Anything that can help us find out why they would take them.” Sangyeon said quietly.

You rode in the middle of the pack, Changmin off to your side. He was oddly quiet as you grabbed his attention.

“Q,” The nickname made him turn to you. “Are you okay?”

Changmin gave you a sad smile. “It wasn’t supposed to go this way. No one was supposed to get abducted. Sunwoo wasn’t going to get hurt.”

Shaking your head, you reached out to pat his shoulder gently. “You can’t blame yourself. You guys are trained for all sorts of situations, but something will always happen that rattles you. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from being in the royal family, it’s to expect the unexpected.”

“You can say that again.” Chanhee said from behind the two of you.

You both looked back at him. “Your mother tells me all the time that she wakes up anticipating something crazy to happen.”

You smiled at his comment that made the other men with you laugh softly. The conversation flowed a bit more after that. Different battle stories being brought up to pass the time. Eric brought up one of Sangyeon’s most impressive feats that he loved to exaggerate.

“I didn’t slay that bear by myself, Eric.” Sangyeon said with a shake of his head.

Eric scoffed. “Come on, hyung. You’re too humble. Sure, Younghoon and Hyunjae were there, but most of the damage was at the hands of your blade.”

You let out a breathless laugh before pointing. “Look.”

Sangyeon brought his head back to the front as he stopped his horse, prompting the other four of you to stop as well. Sangyeon climbed off of his horse as he took a few steps forward.

“That’s it.” Changmin said quietly, almost as if he was afraid someone would hear him.

The building was old and rundown. You were surprised it hadn’t caved in yet, but you weren’t holding your breath.

Sangyeon turned to you guys as he spoke. “We need to hatch a plan. By now, they’ve probably split them into different rooms. This place is bigger than you think so I’ll split off by myself. Eric and Chanhee you two split up together, and Changmin you know to keep Y/N in your sights.”

Everyone nodded at their assignments as you let Changmin help you off the horse. He quickly pulled you around the back side of the bunker while the other three split off to different sides. The wood door in the back was broken at the bottom, prompting Changmin to speak.

“There. We can get in through the bottom of the door. I’ll go first.”

He led the way, dropping to the ground to crawl under the broken wood. You heard him draw his sword before whispering.

“It’s safe, your highness.”

You took that as your cue to slide under the door, scraping your face against the hard concrete. The stinging from your cheek being scraped hurt, but you didn’t let it bother you as you pulled yourself up, pulling Sunwoo’s sword out of its sheath. Changmin gave you a nod as he took careful steps. He was making sure to check his surroundings as you both rounded a corner. The place was eerily quiet. There were only long hallways, making the bunker feel like more of a maze than an actual bunker. Changmin was careful to drag the blade of his sword, as quietly as he could, across the walls each time you took a turn.

“In case we have to turn back.” He told you.

As you took another turn, you heard something.

“Wait,” You called out to Changmin. “I hear something.”

Changmin stopped as you both listened.

“Someone’s talking.”

Changmin took a quiet step towards where the sound was coming from as his eyes widened. “It’s Jacob-hyung!”

Changmin took off towards the direction of his voice, making quite the racket as he continued to move quickly. You were beginning to have trouble keeping up with him before you stopped to catch your breath. That’s when you heard it.

More voices. Muffled, but one of them stood out to you.

“I’m not telling you anything. You’ll have to kill me.”

Juyeon.

You followed his voice. The strain in it made your heart squeeze in your chest as you landed in front of two metal doors. Taking a small step forward, you laid your hands on them, bringing your ear to listen.

“Your majesty has invested a lot in his kids to take over when he passes. The oldest has the most power. Just give us what we want, and we’ll let you go. We hate to have to kill the King’s best guard.” An unfamiliar voice said.

Your heart pounded in your chest as you stepped back. You had to help him! Letting your hands slide down the cool metal, you gripped the handles of the doors before ripping them open. Everyone in the room froze.

The men in front of you were dirty. Faces and clothes covered in muck and blood. Dirt and grime built up under their fingernails. They had small blades equipped to their sides as one of them had Juyeon on his knees with the blade to the side of his throat.

“Y/N,” Juyeon breathed out, eyes widening.

“Your highness,” The man holding Juyeon down spoke. “What a pleasure.”

He grinned, giving way to a nasty, greasy smile. His teeth were black and rotted, holes on just about every tooth that was visible.

“We’ve been waiting for you.” The man spoke again.

You eyed Juyeon. One of his eyes was swollen shut. Cuts on his cheek, nose, and lip all swollen. His clothes were badly ripped with dried blood stains and dirty caked all over them.

“Don’t hurt him.” You said softly.

The men started to laugh as Juyeon attempted to free himself, only for the man to push the blade closer to his neck.

Juyeon stopped struggling as he swallowed, looking over you. He couldn’t believe you were in front of him, and while he was grateful you were okay, he was so afraid they would hurt you.

“Y/N, leave now.”

“What do you want?” You asked the man with the blade.

“Stop asking questions, just leave.”

The man tilted his head, the grin never leaving his face. “You. You don’t even know how much money someone will pay for you. Dead or alive.”

One of his men took a hold of Juyeon and the blade as he took a step towards you.

“Stay away!” Juyeon yelled, beginning to struggle again.

The man stopped in front of you. He was much taller than you, causing you to crane your head up at him. He reached one of his dirty hands up to your hair, sliding a loose strand behind your ear.

“I’ll do whatever you want,” You started.

“Y/N, no!”

“Just, please, don’t hurt him. He means the world to me. I can’t live if he doesn’t. I’ll give you everything I have, every secret I know about the kingdom. You have to let Juyeon go, though.” You told the man quietly.

He looked over you. “Sounds tempting.”

Before he could speak again, one of the men yelled out in pain before dropping to the ground. He was bleeding from his back, an arrow sticking out.

“What the hell?” One of the men exclaimed.

“Someone freed the archer!”

Everything happened so quickly. Multiple men dropped, all from arrows as Juyeon tripped the man holding him. Knocking him out, he grabbed ahold of the blade, cutting the rope around his hands before standing.

The man in front of you grabbed you, pulling you into him as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders, trapping you against him. He moved to a corner away from the window all the men got shot from. He pulled out another blade from his boot, holding it to your neck. Juyeon stayed where he was as he watched the man.

“You’re outnumbered. My crew came back for me. It’s only a matter of time before they close in on us. Especially if they freed Hyunjae.” Juyeon told the man as he took a step closer.

The man brought the blade to your side, pushing on it just slightly to apply pressure, making you gasp. Juyeon stopped.

“Hyung!”

Eric’s voice boomed through the hollow walls of the bunker as multiple footsteps echoed throughout the room. Soon all the royal guards had gathered in the room. They stood by Juyeon’s side as the man spoke.

“I’ll do it! I’m all that’s left! I have nothing to live for! But killing the oldest blood of the King, I’ll be legendary. Don’t think I won’t do it!”

Sangyeon and Hyunjae were the last to enter as Sangyeon drew his sword while Hyunjae drew an arrow. Both boys stood at attention, armed and ready to take down the man holding you. A standoff had presumably taken place. Everyone was waiting for someone to make the first move. That’s when you felt the blade dip through the material of your riding gear, beginning to pierce your skin. He was slowly adding more pressure so as to not draw attention to the fact that he was stabbing you. You had to find a way to free yourself.

You moved both your hands up to the arm that was holding you to his chest as you locked eyes with Hyunjae. Your movement made all the boys step forward as the man pulled back as best he could, pushing the blade a little farther into you. You whimpered before scratching at the man’s hand, giving Hyunjae a nod.

Hyunjae let the arrow he had drawn go as it hit the man square in the middle of his hand. The man yelled out in pain as you pulled away and dropped to the floor. Juyeon copied your movements, meeting you halfway as he pulled you into his arms. Hyunjae quickly drew another arrow before letting it fly, effectively silencing the yelling man. You looked over at his lifeless body, watching Sangyeon and Hyunjae make sure he was dead as someone pulled the blade out of your side.

You gasped as you turned in Juyeon’s arms. Younghoon was on one knee, hand held tight to your side to slow down the bleeding.

“Hyung, we have to move now. This cut is deep!” Younghoon told him.

He helped Juyeon lift you as you all worked your way back through the bunker to the exit. You went out the same way you came in thanks to Changmin’s markings on the walls. When you exited, a brigade of soldiers stood outside the bunker with your father at the helm. The men tapped at his shoulder before he turned, watching his guards carry you out.

You clung tightly to Juyeon, who did the same as he went straight to a free horse, loading you and himself up on the saddle. Your father pushed through the guards, shooting a glance at Sangyeon as he tried to catch up with Juyeon who was more worried about the deep cut on your side than debriefing with the King.

“Juyeon, let me,”

“No!” He said before taking off.

Juyeon would deal with the consequences of talking back later. He needed to get you to safety. As he rode, he continued to sneak glances down at you, not wanting to take his eyes off you. He needed you to stay awake. Just until he got you to the castle, but you were losing so much blood.

“Just stay with me, okay? We’re almost there!” Juyeon said as he willed the horse to go faster.

You figured you had enough strength to speak, and just as you opened your mouth, you blacked out.

When you came to, it was dark. The only light coming from a small candle lit by the bed you were in. Your eyes took a minute to adjust as you looked around the room. You were home. You were in your room. You continued to look around to be sure before seeing a figure standing by your window, a figure you recognized all too well.

“Juyeon,” You rasped out.

Juyeon turned on his heels quickly, eyes widening as he strided over to the side of your bed. He dropped to his knees, grabbing your hand as he gently kissed your knuckles.

He gave you a soft smile. “Hi. You’re awake.”

You looked over his face as you frowned. The swelling had gone down, blacks, blues, and discolored greens decorated his face.

“Don’t worry. It hurts worse than it looks.”

You scoffed. “That doesn’t make me feel better, Juyeon.”

The boy chuckled. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

It was at this moment you realized that you had been out for quite some time.

“How long have I been,” Juyeon interrupted.

“Three days.”

Your eyes widened as you tried to sit up, letting out a gasp at the sharp pain that reverberated throughout your body from your side. Juyeon gently stopped you, helping you lay back down.

“Don’t try to move. Your stitches could break.” Juyeon whispered.

You pulled your hand from the boy’s grasp, gently cupping his cheek to keep from hurting him. Juyeon didn’t let you be too gentle as he took the feather-like touch as an opportunity to nuzzle into your hand.

“You’re okay? Everyone is okay?” You whispered out into the dark room.

The candlelight flickered, casting shadows across Juyeon’s face as he nodded. “Everyone is okay.”

You let out a deep sigh of relief as you finally relaxed. You looked up at the ceiling before looking back at the boy.

He had a ghost of a smile on his face as you spoke. “What?”

He shrugged. “You saved me. You risked your life…for me.”

You nodded. “Of course I did! You’re the love of my life. I’d give up everything for you. Even if it means not being a royal anymore.”

The boy leaned down to gently peck your lips, but you wanted more. You grasped his face, pulling him closer as you laid a more full kiss to his lips. At first, Juyeon tensed up, not wanting to hurt you. Then he relaxed, letting himself get lost in the kiss. He pulled away, leaning his forehead against yours as he chuckled to himself.

“I missed you so much.” Juyeon said.

Pecking his lips once more, you grinned. “I missed you more.”

“I’m still not happy that you risked your life to come save me, though.”

You shrugged. “What is it that you said before you left? Like a moth to a flame, right?”

Juyeon let his eyes close as he let out a breathless laugh. “Touché.”

Juyeon gently crawled into bed with you, maneuvering you around into a comfy position so that he could hold you without hurting you. You guys laid quietly on the bed, just holding each other as the morning sun peeked into the room.

Juyeon looked towards the window, letting out a yawn as he got up.

“Wait,” You said, keeping a firm grasp on his large hand. “Help me up.”

He hesitated. “I really think you should stay in bed.”

“Lee Juyeon, I’ve been in this bed for three days. It’s time for me to get up. I won’t get better laying down all day every day.”

The boy shook his head, cursing your stubbornness as he helped you to your feet. You were wearing clean cotton clothing that was soft to the touch. The bandage wrapped tightly around your abdomen, moving ever so slightly catching your stitches. The slight pinch made you wince as you took a deep breath before looking up at the boy.

Even like this, Juyeon was in complete awe of you. You were amazing. The boy let go of your hands to cup your face, wanting to give you another kiss before a knock sounded at the door.

You called out to the person as the door pushed open. Hyunjae popped his head in as he smiled, bowing to you.

“Your highness, good to see you out of bed.” Hyunjae told you. “Juyeon, his majesty would like a word with you.”

Juyeon stared at the boy for a moment before nodding. He looked at you as he gave you a small smile. You shook your head, going to speak before he stopped you.

“It’s okay.” He whispered.

His hands dropped from your face, to his sides as he headed for the door. Hyunjae gave him a sad smile as he patted his back. The moment he exited the room, your heart dropped. You really thought your father would spare him since he saved you. Hyunjae looked back at you as he walked over, helping you sit on the bed.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. We tried to change his mind.” Hyunjae said softly.

You could only nod. “Could you help me to the greenhouse? I just want to be outside and alone for a moment.”

Hyunjae nodded, standing and holding out his hand for you to take. He walked you to the greenhouse, opening the door as you let go of his hand. You sat on one of the benches, breathing in the fresh air as you awaited the dreadful news praying that your father would at least let Juyeon say goodbye to you.

The flowers were in full bloom. Pretty peonies, tulips, and lavenders decorated the greenhouse. Different fruit trees grow throughout the grounds. Your mother took pride in making the greenhouse beautiful. She had her reasons for picking each plant, specifically the peonies because they were able to withstand even the harshest weather conditions, constantly growing back no matter what. It was a peaceful oasis to escape to when things became too much. That’s where you would always end up, and where Juyeon always knew to look for you first.

The footsteps behind you brought back all too familiar memories as you shut your eyes tightly. You kept them close as the footsteps got closer, practically closing in on you. They stopped behind you before you felt the bench shift just slightly.

“One day I’m going to hide somewhere different to get away from everything. When you come looking for me here first, I’ll be gone.” You said softly.

The laugh you loved so much filled the large greenhouse. “That will certainly be a first. It’s too bad I’m always one step ahead of you. I always know where you are and where you’re going before you do. Part of my job.”

His statement made you let out a breathless laugh as you opened your eyes. When you looked at him, he was already staring at you. His cat-like eyes showed nothing but love.

“How much trouble did you get into?”

Juyeon smiled as he grabbed your hand. “A lot. I was relieved of my duties,”

You felt your shoulders slump. So much for holding out hope. You had hoped your father would be lenient on Juyeon like he was with Sangyeon.

“I’m sorry, Juyeon. I’m so sorry.” You whispered.

Juyeon chuckled. “Don’t be. He already got me another job.”

You smiled sadly. “Where is he sending you to?”

Juyeon let out a breath as he began to grin. “I have to be the head guard for this spoiled royal brat. Follow them around, watch their every move. Make sure they stay out of trouble and obey their father.”

His last comment made your head shoot in his direction. “You, you’re not leaving?”

Juyeon shook his head, dark fringe falling in front of his eyes as you jumped into his arms. Your weight hit him like a truck making him grunt as he wrapped his arms around you.

“You’re stuck with me, your highness.” Juyeon said as he nuzzled his face into your neck.

You felt him leave soft, feather-like kisses on your neck before lifting his head to peck your cheek, then your temple. You pulled away, pulling the boy into a deep kiss. He held onto you as tight as he could without hurting you as you both pulled apart.

“I love you. No one on this planet can keep me from you. I hope you know that.” Juyeon said with the utmost confidence.

Nodding, you pecked his lips. “I know. And I love you too.”

He went to pull you in for another kiss before you turned your head, making his lips land on your cheek.

“What was that for?”

“Lee Juyeon, I am not a brat.” You exclaimed.

A big, sly smile made its way to Juyeon’s face as he tilted his head. “You most certainly are a brat, but that’s okay because I want you to be my brat until the peonies stop growing back.”

“That might take a while,” You teased.

He shrugged, pecking your lips. “The rest of your life okay?”

thank you so much for reading! like and reblog if you enjoyed and let me know how you liked it! feedback is always welcome🤍🤍

[automatonwithautonomy]

anyways. i really fucking love gordon porlock. insane guy. he's so alone, constantly isolated, working on this one thing that he is terrified of. he's so afraid, all the time, that they're going to get him, that they're going to succeed, so afraid he almost just. doesn't care anymore. it's just this thing he does, this weird little hobby like playing sonic the fucking hedgehog 2.

and then he makes one (1) singular friend who turns out to be the eye of this fucking hurricane. and he gets dragged away and stuck at red valley and suddenly he's more alone than ever. and now his life revolves around warren, the same way every else's at red valley does (except for warren himself.) and his only friend is sort of dying maybe and kind of really doesn't care he just wants to sleep. and he gets a fucking tortoise and he meets the woman he's only ever known as a voice from the tapes or a hand behind typed, hushed conversations. and she's one of two people now in his life who don't actively hate him. she doesn't even like him. (there's also the tortoise.) and he's falling apart and the world's falling apart and warren fucking godby is fucking falling apart and gordon can't save much of anything but fuck, he's going to try.

and then he gets shot.

and then he sleeps.

[sabbathbloodysabbeth]

This is a Drabble I came up with and I just want to post it because I can :)

Pretty Woman Au with A/B/O themes

Steve regrets every decision that led him into driving this stupid fucking car. He didn't know how to drive shift, and here he was parked in god knows where, with numerous hookers eyeing his car up. Grunting he moves to roll his window up, just in case. Before he can though an male Alpha has his arms on the window, a cocky little smirk on his face. His curls were falling into his eyes, in obvious need of a hair cut and from where Steve was sitting the light was slightly glistening off the guys piercings. With the way he was crouched over he couldn't see all of them accept for a few. His omega a bit alarmed that he has a Alpha on the side of car right now, who was starting to stink his car up with a raspberry scent.

"Hey big boy, looking for a good time tonight?" The Alpha talks smoothly, never raising or lowering his voice with the other. Smiling in a charming way as he doesn't move his eyes from the other. Faltering when Steve fidgets anxiously obviously nervous about the others presence. His mouth opens a bit as he tilts his head a little to the side, a lip ring making its self known as he takes a breath to say something but Steve was beating him to it.

"No- I'm not... I'm not looking for that sorry." Steve says firmly, or as firm as he could get. Watching at the others shoulders slouch a bit disappointed. Probably from the loss of money. "I'm kind of lost, do you know where the Prince's Shack is?" He asks. Sounding hopeful as he watches the other perk up again.

"Yeah.. it's that rich hotel right?" Steve nods in response, biting his lip a bit as the guy grins mischievously. "Yeah, for a twenty I can show you myself." That wasn't the worst idea, Steve was terrible at remembering directions when it came to driving.

Normally he had his phone up with a gps pulled up, but he had forgotten to grab it in his rush to get the hell out of the party he had been at. Not wanting to face both his parents who had dropped in unannounced to check up on his partnerships. He was probably going to hear about it over the phone tomorrow, but for now he was contemplating whether or not it was safe to allow a random Alpha into his car. One that could easily hold him at knife point for all of his money. Though Steve wasn't the smartest, and the man in front of him seemed desperate to get in his car. Constantly looking over his shoulder as if he was expecting someone.

"Alright, get in the damn car." Steve sighs. Rubbing a hand through his hair. Eyes never moving away from the other, who's grin only grows bigger as he nearly climbs in the window from excitement. Sitting down, chains hit the seat and Steve doesn't understand how the hell he had the will power of rejecting this Alpha. The outfit wasn't the sexiest, but the other was definitely working with what he got. A black see through top showing of his tattooed chest and body, the bottom of said shirt tucked in a pair of black ripped skinny jeans that didn't leave much to the imagination. If they were passing on the side walk Steve wouldn't have guessed this guy was a hooker. Though he could understand why anyone for that matter would want to spend the night with him, just one glance at his hand covered with rings Steve was even considering having his way the dude.

He's snapped from his thoughts when the guy tosses a bag onto the floor of the car, a leather coat wrapped around the strap. Closing the door shut behind him as he leans over the cup holder with a grin. "You are a life saver my friend." He says happily.

Steve just huffs as he starts to car back up, struggles with the shift cringing along with his passenger at the noise that comes out of the car as they start to move forward. "Just buckle up." Steve bosses the other with ease, it was apart of his job after all. It was also worth watching the others facial expression, who falters for a second earning a exaggerated facial expression and hand gesture from Steve. Who was trying to act annoyed. The click of the seat belt is what signals Steve into conversation. "So what's your name?"

"What do you want it to be baby?" The guys tone is back to the flirty one he held earlier. Earning a scoff from Steve who gives him a 'really' look. Watching him deflate as he gives in. "It's Eddie." He huffs out before pointing at the shift in the others hand. "Do you even know how to use that?" He asks, cooling off with trying to get in Steve's pants, which was much appreciated as Steve quickly shakes his head no.

"Nope," he pops the p as he pulls up to the light. "Not one fucking clue." He answers, messing with the shift again. Scrunching his nose up at the noise before looking up at the other. "Do you know how?" He asks curiously. Secretly praying to all that was holy that this man did know.

"Yeah I do..." Eddie looks at him as he squints his eyes at him. "You look like a George, can I call you George?" He asks. A hint of amusement in his eyes, causing a snort to erupt from Steve's chest.

"No- it's Steve. And you will be driving me to my hotel." He says bossily. Unbuckling himself as Eddie's eyes grow wide. Moving and parking the card off to the side, turning the car off and pulling the keys out of the ignition. Just in case the other decided to get smart with him. He moves out of the car smoothly, raising a impatient eyebrow at the other who was quickly stumbling out and over his feet. Moving and passing Steve as they trade spots.

Steve now sits in the passenger side, slightly anxious now knowing that this guy could drive him anywhere and not listen. But he once again he found himself doing something stupid and reckless. Throwing the keys to the other, who was slowly getting amped up about driving a sports car. Hands tapping the wheel excitedly as he checks everything. Purposely looking at Steve with a grin, before he's hitting the gas pedal and they go much faster then what Steve had been driving. A lot smoother as well and no alarming sounds coming from the vehicle which was a improvement.

Idk if I want to continue this 😭