#this coward thought he could bully me bc we were in there alone

[uncle-fruity]

Guy in the men's room at the library today got Big Mad that I came in to use the stall. He kept saying, "This is the men's bathroom" and "I know I'm a man; I was born with a dick" and various other transphobias. Kept talking shit to the point that I couldn't focus on peeing & getting out of there.

I finally yelled at him to shut the fuck up in my deepest, butchiest voice. He was arguing with me, saying he needed to shit (he had been standing talking to himself in front of the mirror before I came in, so I sorta doubt it). I told him to leave me alone so I could use the restroom. Or that he could use the women's bathroom himself. Thankfully, I'd texted my partner, who came in to help. A librarian also got involved. And this guy kept saying that I was harassing him and that I'd looked like a girl when I walked in. He threatened to call the cops (but didn't). The librarian told him he had to leave, and after some arguing with them, he finally did so. I'm very thankful I had support and allies around me.

So, idk where this fabled male privilege that I supposedly have was in that moment. Maybe it was hiding in my long hair. Maybe I left it home with the binder I barely ever use. Maybe my beard and voice weren't enough to make me pass. Maybe it was too high for me (a whole 5 foot nothing) to reach when I needed it. Or maybe, just maybe... people clock me as trans and therefore my would-be male privilege is extremely conditional based on how much I'm able or willing to conform to the gender binary (which I have no interest in doing).

[bittersweet--chaos]

Ok another Gabe, Angel, and David one sorry

Ok so what if Gabe got into a fight with someone at school bc David and Angel raised a good son so when Gabe saw someone getting bullied he wasn't just going to watch so he got involved but he tried to not throw punches but once the bully started to throw punches and talk shit about Asher's and Milo's kids (aka his friends) he thought that was the last straw for him and hit back because when he was little David told him if someone throws the first punch then take self defense or something like that and he thought him how to fight and once they were done fighting the bully was fucked up ofc but Gabe was also kinda bet up not as bad as the bully.

When they were done the bully ran off and when they looked back and the person that was getting bullied was gone but he just wanted to get home but when he exited the school the person that was getting bullied ran up to him and thanked him and how he didn't have to do all that but he said that he did because he doesn't stand for that shit (just like David)

Once he gets home he thinks that Angel is in their bedroom and David is in his office so he goes to the kitchen but he sees David and Angel there making dinner and they see him and offer him to help them witch he would because don't get me wrong he loves cooking with his parents but he didn't want them to see so he before they turn around to see him he puts on his hoodie so they won't see his face but David could see that something was wrong because 1. Gabe never puts on his hoodie inside the house 2. Gabe never refused to cook with them, and 3. David could smell Gabe's nose bleed. So to David that's all red flags and yeah could you continue because I ran out of the idea how? Idk :'D

Fight

Dude the obession we have with Gabe lol. I feel like you overestimate my writing abilities just a little bit though.

Asher has a daughter and Milo has twins I don't make the rules. I hope you enjoy!

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Gabe hated bullies. They were people who messed with people because they were insecure about themselves. And Gabe wasn't going to let a bully do that to someone. So when some random kid started messing with his friends, he wasn't going to stand for that. "Would you leave them alone? They did nothing to you!" Gabe said as he stood infront of his friend. "Or what? You gonna do something?" The bully scoffed. "Gabe, c'mon. Let's just take the others and leave. We're not trying to start something." Asher's daughter, Leah, called. Gabe let a small growl out before nodding. "Yeah Gabe. Listen to your girlfriend and leave like a coward." Gabe rolled his eyes as he turned towards the kid. He wasn't going to let some jackass rile him up for some stupid comment. "Wow you really gonna run away and hide? Might as well cloak like that stupid little stealth you hang around."

"What did you just say?"

"You heard me. Cloak and hide like that stupid little stealth friend. Or shift and run with your tail between your legs." The bully scoffed and crossed his arms. Gabe turned back towards him, his friends behind him with the kid that was being bullied. "Shut up. You're not gonna shit talk my friends." Gabe let out a low growl and stared at the bully. "Or what. You're gonna make me shut up, wimp." The small growl that Gabe had amplified as he stepped closer to the bully. He stared up at him, his fist curled up by his side. Silence filled the hall that the group were standing in. A crowd was beginning to form around them and if Gabe looked around, he wouldn't be able to spot his friends from it. Finally, Gabe spoke, which broke the tense silence that was fogging the atmosphere. "I'm not gonna waste my time with someone as pathetic as you."

"The hell did you say?"

"You heard me. I'm not gonna waste my time on someone as pathetic as you. I'm leaving."

Gabe turned, but before he could walk away the bully threw a punch at the back of his head. A loud chorus of the word, "Fight, fight, fight fight," rang out and Gabe turned back towards him. He held the back of his head, a achey pain blossomed through his skull as he snarled at the guy. A smirk was on the bully's face as he went to throw another punch, but this one Gabe managed to dodge. Gabe usually wouldn't result to violence. It wasn't something he was taught to do. But, he was also taught by his Adi that, and I quote, "When someone hits you first, you have my full permission to whoop their ass. I'll cover for you." To which David would always sight and tell Gabe otherwise. But today, he was taking his parents's words into consideration. He threw a punch at the bully's nose, a thick loud crack noise coming after the impact hit. "FUCK!" They bully yelled and held his nose. It was probably broken, but definitely bleeding. He kicked Gabe in his stomach, kneeing him back in the nose when he doubled over.

Before Gabe could even reach his nose to wipe at the blood, the bully butt his head against his. The crowd around them was so loud, screaming for the two to continue. Gabe quickly composed himself, throwing another punch at the bully. It landed on his face, then another to his eye, then his stomach. "GET HIM GABE! YOU GOT THIS MAN! WHOOP HIS ASS!" He could hear his friends cheer for at in the crowd. Gabe continued his barrage of punches until two teachers tore the two apart. The bully looked horrible. His had a black eye with bruises littering his face. His continued to hold his broken, bloody nose as he walked to the nurses office with a teacher. Gabe looked a bit better than him, only a couple bruises and a bloody nose. "Gabriel Shaw, to the principal's office. Now."

Gabe spent most of his day in the office with the principal, explaining to her why he got into a fight. His friends, Leah, Amber and Ashton, came into the office much later. When Gabe had asked if the kid they stood up for was ok, they shrugged. "We don't know. Once the fight had started I think they ran away." The twins spoke at the same time as they sat down beside Gabe. He sighed and looked down at his hand. The knuckles were bruised and bloody. "I could try and heal that for you if you want." Leah asked, grabbing Gabe's hand and looking over it. "No it's fine. I don't want you to tire yourself." Gabe smiled. "I'm not gonna get tired from simply healing a few bruises. I'll be fine, just let me help?" Gabe sighed and nodded. The refreshing feeling of healing magic washed over Gabe's bruised hand. The small bruises slowly began to heal until there was nothing left. "Thanks Leah." Gabe smiled up once everything was over. "No problem."

As the day waned on, Gabe finally got to go home. As he walked out the school building alone, a voice called out from behind him. Her stopped walking, turning back towards the voice. He small figure stopped infront of him, breathing heavily as if they ran to catch up to him. They probably did. "I-I just- god that was a long run. I just wanted to thank you. For-for sticking up for me back there. You didn't have to." It was the kid that was being bullied. Gabe smiled shyly and rubbed the back of his head. "Oh, it's no problem at all. I hate bullies and wasn't going to just ignore you."

"Well, I gotta go. But, thank you again." The kid smiled amd waved good bye while walking away. Gabe smiled and continued to walk back to his house. But he stopped again when realization dawned on him. His parents are gonna ask why he's so beat up! "Damn it." He groaned. He pulled his hood over his head and continued with his trek home. Upon returning home, he thought his parents would be in their own rooms, doing their own things. He hoped so, that way he could get into the house and not be noticed. He kept his hood on as he opened the front door and walked inside. "Gabe? That you baby?"

A voice called out from the kitchen. Crap! Gabe remained silent, hoping he could simply walk to his room without being noticed. "I know your home Gabe. We're in the kitchen." David called. Gabe silently cursed, walking to the kitchen door way. His head was hung low and his hood covered his face. "Hey Adi, Dad." He said sheepishly, tugging at the hem of his hoodie. The two of them stopped cooking and turned towards Gabe. "Why is your hood on? What's wrong?" David was the first to ask, noticing immediately that something was up and that his son was trying to hide something. "Nothing's wrong dad. I'm fine." Angel and David both looked at each other with a knowing look. "Then why is your hood on? Inside the house." Gabe's fiddling increased as he thought of some lie. "Uh...it's cold in the house!"

"Uh-uh. Gabe I'm wearing shorts." Angel pointed out, causing Gabe go look up a little. "Oh....right."

"Hood, off. Now." Angel said, using the spatula they had in their hand to point at Gabe. "Do I have to?" Gabe whined a little, his hands never moving to pick the hood off his head. "Yes. I'm not asking Gabriel." Sighing, Gabe reached up to take the hood off. "What the hell happened?!" Angel asked, dropping the kitchen utensil they had in hand to rush over to their son. He cupped his face, scanning over bruise and bit of blood that remained. "Adi I'm fine. Just a small fight-" Angel looked at Gabe, squishing his face in their hands. "A fight?! With you in it?!? Who was it?! Did you win?"

"Angel, now is not the time to ask if Gabriel won a fight. Why'd you get into a fight in the first place?" David asked, walking up the them. Angel released Gabe from their grasp so David could could inspect his face. There was dried blood on his nose and a few bruises, but he looked fine for all David could care. "It was some bully. They were messing with a kid so I stepped in," Gabe started telling his story. David placed a hand on his son's face, healing the bruises and cleaning off the blood. "We were gonna leave, me, the twins, and Leah, but then the bully started targeting Ashton. So I told him to stop. He didn't so then I called him pathetic."

Angel snorted a little from beside David, quickly clearing their throat when their husband gave them a look. The walked over to the counter and grabbed a paper towel, putting a little water on it before walking back over. They wiped at whatever blood David could clean off with his thumb. "Then he punched me. I didn't start the fight at least. He did! And Adi said that if someone hit me first then I had their permission to hit them back!" Gabe said. "I did say that." Angel leaned back to inspect Gabriel's face again. It looked better, not bruised and bloody like when he first came home. "Did you win though?" Angel asked as they threw the blood stained paper towel away. "Yes I did win. I may also have broken his nose."

"That's my son." Angel smiled. "Don't encourage this Angel. You still got into a fight." Gabe sighed and looked down at his hands again, fiddling with the hem of his sleeves. He was completely ready for his dad to read him the riot act, but instead he felt a hand get placed on his shoulder. "But it was to protect people. I'm proud of you." Gabe looked up to see his dad smiling at him. It was a small smile, but a smile none the less. A small sense of pride filled in both David and Gabe's chest. "Alright. Now that everything's ok, let's go back to making dinner ok?" Angel smiled Gabe and pecked a kiss on his and David's cheek. "Can we make my favorite for dinner?" Gabe asked, walking to the kitchen sink to wash his hands. "Fine. Wash your hands and we can get started." Gabe nodded and smiled. At least he wasn't in trouble.

[kylecoopers]

i’m also stealing this from @bastianlis​ and @westcfsalem​ bc quite frankly i’m aLWAYS down to plot and while i’ve tried my best to reach out to everyone, i’ve gotten a little swamped in messages and i think i’ve missed some people. so, in hopes of reaching out to new members and characters i may not have plotted a lot with, here are some plots i think could work for my babes.

key: plots that are in italics are uber wanted just bc i think it’d be good for growth or just fun to play out !!

kyle cooper. resident sad boi, will agree with you if you try to bully him. kinda over life. trans and proud and pan and proud! avid dog lover, will only accidentally sleep with your ex and feel terrible about it for the rest of his life. rooms with his hubby who’s not his hubby sonny in audax and sonny’s his front man in his own little drug scheme where he sells his adderall so they can afford weed n stuff. really sweet, just wants to make people happy and v v selfless tbh. will die 4 u but will sacrifice u for a dog at the same time. not to be trusted for this reason alone.definitely true good or lawful good like i have no idea which one. definitely uwus and owos unironically. kermit the frog is his fursona even tho he’s definitely not a furry, he just says he is so another furry feels comfortable and if ur reading this u know who u are. intro | secret | pinterest | spotify playlist 

wanted connections: more antagonistic plots tbh. like give me enemies, give me physical fights, give me him sticking up for his friends since i know he won’t stick up for himself. ex friends that he’s lost along the way. give me more bad influences too who keep him out too late and let him make out with random people in parties during his transitional phase, give me the people he’s making out with. childhood friends are a must too, he grew up in new york and was in the suburbs for a little while but in the city for the other half. and honestly a LOT of people who are getting their supply of adderall from kyle and sonny bc like that’s their secret and there’s none bc we just recently decided it was gonna be an active thing they’re doing. and some more friend plots are always wanted but he lowkey needs his own little emotional support friends for when him and sonny are being useless gays and can’t just tell each other what is going on.

nicole woods. a hot motherfucking mess. will ghost you, collective heartbreaker and occasional other woman. honestly a coward, terrified of her own feelings so she’s always doing dumb shit. chaotic neutral. current roommates with the only person she is 100% selfless for and will kill 4 her or indira tbh. an effortlessly bitchy person, doesn’t know how to keep her mouth shut and will tell you what she thinks if it doesn’t have to do with her feelings. proud wiw but will fuck guys, probs is the top regardless won’t lie, 5′3 and full of fury.

intro | secret | pinterest | spotify playlist

wanted connections: she’s notorious for ghosting people and collecting hearts so having more people she’s fucked over is kinda a need. maybe more enemies like, she has some but she’s probs not number one in terms of how liked she is in lockwood. give me more flings too; she’s biromantic so she’d go any way. maybe a partner in crime she does fuck shit with. she’s from baltimore so she might not have any childhood friends but maybe some friends she made over the internet that ended up going to the same school as her? her stepsiblings are still connections but i’m always down for cousins n such. also hookups n stuff idk if i said that but it’s always welcome.

maple wolfe. the love child of fleetwood mac and hozier’s music tbh. aloof and kinda loner-like, can be found usually drawing somewhere in a quiet place or doing assignments out in the open. probably painted a school mural with a few art friends. used to roommates with tati but now lives in potentas alone. true neutral, really just stays to themself. can be a little too cunning and observant, keeps mental notes on people and tries to figure out their weakness in case they need it. probably wanted to be a forest nymph growing up and when that didn’t happen they were like “well fuck it ig” and went into art. can be kinda short in terms of talking if they’re not comfortable with you but if you bring up the right topics they’ll ramble for hours with thought-provoking conversations and debates about simple things such as who’s the best artist from certain eras and why the only reason things seem bad is because we see everything nowadays. also probs lowkey the epitome of the raven poem by edgar allen poe.

intro | secret | pinterest | spotify playlist

wanted connections: honestly some flings would be cool and maybe some exes because they’re a cutie. some people they maybe grow close to, maybe people from virginia who they know if there’s even anyone here. and potentially a connection to their secret; someone who was related to the person involved or knows of it for that sweet angst or someone who’s father was the cop on duty that night. art friends who painted a mural with them in memory of tati or something. honestly i’m down for anything w/ them they’re just easy to work with.

jasper beaumont. grade a dumbass, amazing singer, probably has a soundcloud tbh and he wouldn’t be ashamed. doesn’t give a fuck about anything, has mommy and daddy issues, the guy you should bring home if you wanna piss your dad off. honestly loyal as fuck to his friends but once you cross him, you’re done. deals with his issues w/ his fists and is just a violence drive person but he won’t hit w/o warrant. coulda been a comedian, definitely had a vine account that got some sort of traction. will fuck anything that consents and has a pulse. fuck gender norms and will show up to events in whatever the fuck he wants. pronouns are he/him and they/them so pls use correctly. his secret is tba but !! be on the look out ;))

intro | secret (tba!) | pinterest | spotify playlist

wanted connections. hook ups, ride or dies, people he’s taken the blame for because baby boy does lowkey have a huge crime sheet. people he cheated on, people he cheated with, people he was the other man to, flings, exes, way more antagonistic plots, maybe some bromance bc i mean bros. maybe somebody he knows from l.a or people he knows from high school? he was around tati for that. a roommate too! he lives in fidelis

[ckerouac]

fic: other duties as assigned

Title: Other Duties as Assigned  (AO3)

Fandom: MCU

Summary:  Peter wasn’t sure how exactly he ended up playing errand boy for the Black Widow in a department store downtown while she bullied Captain America into a new wardrobe, but if that's where the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man was needed, he wasn't going to leave his SPIDER BRO hanging.

Notes: This is all @slayediest fault - the prompt was ‘anyone takes Steve shopping for new clothes’ and, well, this happened.

Peter wasn’t sure how exactly he ended up playing errand boy for the Black Widow in a department store downtown.  One minute he was working on a chemistry lab report with Ned, and then next he was getting a flurry of texts from Mr. Stark about an ‘intervention’ and ‘secret mission’ and ‘if it’s too much for you you can say no’.  Which, of course he wasn’t going to say no! He was an Avenger! Well, sort of… mostly… close enough. Technically.

And then there was a text from the Black Widow asking politely if he’d be willing to help out a fellow spider because there was someone in terrible need.  

HE WAS GOING TO BE SPIDER BROS WITH THE BLACK WIDOW.

Ned promised to keep the app open in his phone that they’d linked to KAREN just in case Peter needed his guy in the chair, because if it was something that Natasha Romanoff was asking for help with, it had to be something serious. Life threatening.  Maybe there were more aliens. Or an accident at a chemical plant. Or a nuclear bomb.  Or a mass arrest of guys on Wall Street because it turns out they were linked to HYDRA and that’s why they were trying to bring down American democracy.  MJ talked about that lot, so that would totally be something that the Black Widow would be involved in. He wasn’t sure what he could do to help with that, but he could web up bad guys with the best of them and if they needed him, it didn’t matter what it was.  He was going to be there!

“I just think the blue looks better,” Natasha said, reaching over to pull the navy blue t-shirt from the pile on Peter’s lap to hand to Steve.  “It brings out the blue of your eyes.”

“Is that really a thing?” Steve asked, taking the shirt and looking for all intents and purposes like a defeated man as he stood in the doorway of the dressing room.  

Natasha gave him a light squeeze of the shoulder.  “I get that you’ve been out of the dating game for a while, but trust me.  It’s a thing.”

“I’m not trying to get back into the dating game,” Steve replied.  But he took the shirt, along with the pile of jeans Natasha had already handed him and retreated back into the dressing room.  

“You can’t blame me for trying!” she laughed.  “What about Melissa?”

“Which one is Melissa?”

“The one who coordinated the HVAC repair to the tower last month.”

Natasha…” Steve said, his voice going for ‘warning’ or ‘not again’.  “You sound like Old Mrs. Goldstein who lived two floors down from me growing up.  She was convinced Bucky was going to die alone and unloved if he didn’t find a girl who was dumb enough to settle for him.”

“And what about you?” Natasha asked.

That got Steve to crack open the door and smile.  “She figured I’d die alone after getting punched by someone for talking back to them.”

“So, pretty much how you’re likely to die now,” Natasha pointed out.

“Pretty much,” Steve said, and closed the door once again.

“Excuse me,” Peter said.  “But… um… I thought you said that there was a big crisis that needed the Avengers?”

Natasha dropped down onto the bench next to Peter and smiled.  It wasn’t that it was unnerving when she smiled, Peter decided, it was just that you couldn’t tell at all what she was smiling about.  Like, was she smiling about Captain America in a dressing room? Or the pile of clothes in his lap? Was she smiling about how it was silly that Peter thought she wanted to be spider bros, even though he’d never actually used the spider bros line yet?  He was gonna wait until they were taking down the bad guys, and then slip is casually into conversation, and she was gonna laugh and think that it was brilliant, and then he’d name the text thread that they’d inevitably start SPIDER BROS and it would become a thing.  

It’s like whenever MJ decided to smile.  She only smiled when she thought he was doing something stupid.

Oh… shit… was the Black Widow smiling a ‘Peter you’re so dumb’ smile?

“What I said was there was someone who needed our help,” Natasha pointed out.

“And it was… Mr. Rogers?”

A bigger grin this time.  “I love it when you call him that,” she said.  “Look, I’ve been trying to get him to update his wardrobe.  He lives in khakis and SHIELD shirts, unless someone specifically pulls something different out for him.  I think if he had his way, he’d live in his uniform.”

“I mean, what’s wrong with that?”

Natasha leaned in a little closer.  “Do you have someone you like?”

Yes. “No.”

“Have you dressed up for them in the past?”

Yes. “No.”  Peter’s eyes went wide.  “Wait, does Mr. Rogers have a date?  Is that why we’re here? Are we getting him ready for a date?  Where would someone like him go on a date? Like, the Statue of Liberty?  Is that too cliche?”

She reached over and gave him a squeeze on the shoulder.  Peter tried hard not to look too excited. It was the same thing she did to Captain America!  They really were going to be spider bros! “It’s just a closet refresh,” she said. “Don’t think too hard about it.”

“But… if it’s not something… wait, why me?” Peter asked.  “Why did you and Mr. Stark ask me to come along?”

Natasha shrugged as Steve emerged.  “We told him you were struggling with a personal problem, and he jumped at the chance to help.”

“Wait, you used me as bait?!”

“And I fell for it,” Steve replied.  He placed his hands on his hips and glared at Natasha.  “Taking advantage of an old man is elder abuse.”

Before Peter realized what he was doing, he’d lifted his phone to take a picture of Cap’s stare of disappointment.  “Sorry, sorry,” he said. “It’s just that’s the exact look you have in the videos they show when we have detention, and I always thought that was some acting they made you do, but it’s…”

“It’s just his face,” Natasha beamed.  “But I’m immune to it. Plus, I don’t think that’ll be any way to get a response to profile I put up for you on SexySeniorDating.com.”

“What detention video?” Steve asked, ignoring Natasha’s jab because Peter was sure that she’d actually put up a dating profile for him behind his back.  Would she?

“You know, the ‘so you’ve found yourself in detention’ video,” Peter explained, doing his best Captain America expression, complete with sigh and pursed lips.  “There’s a whole bunch of them.”

Steve looked like he was going to deflate right there, and his frown was about as large as Natasha’s grin.  “I still can’t believe I let Tony talk me into those,” he mumbled. “Just like your USO tour,” he mimicked. “But enriching the minds of today’s youth.”

“You were recently thawed, your brain was probably still a little icy,” Natasha pointed.  

“No, wait, they’re great!” Peter insisted.  Insulting Captain America would probably completely squash his plans to be spider bros with the Black Widow cause even if she liked to make fun of him, no one else could make fun of Captain America.  I mean, he was CAPTAIN AMERICA. Why would anyone want to make fun of him? He was amazing, and he was here hanging out with Peter, even if it was technically because Peter was bait in a convoluted plot for the Black Widow to keep making fun of him…

Wait… ‘squash’... like a bug… he just got that!  He needed to remember to tell Ned that he’d come up with a great spider pun with his spider bro Natasha.

“I can pull one up for you!”

“Please don’t.” “I already have one as my voicemail message.”

Steve and Natasha turned to stare at each other.  Peter was pretty sure neither of them were telepathic, but he couldn’t actually be sure, but there was obviously something getting exchanged between them.  

Steve was the first to relent.  He sighed, shook his head, and grabbed another couple of shirts from Peter’s lap pile.  “Let’s get this over with,” he said, retreating back into the dressing room.

“Wait, I’m going to find you a jacket,” Natasha said.  

“I already have a jacket.”

“Not one you’ve gotten shot in, a nice blazer,” she called out as she left Peter to watch Steve and, as she’d explained when this whole outing started, ‘make sure he didn’t run away like a coward’.

“Is.. there anything I can get you, Mr. Rogers?” Peter asked.

A laugh came from behind the door.  “No, kid, I’m fine.”

“I’m sorry for being bait,” Peter continued.  “I thought there was, you know, a thing that needed attention and all hands on deck.  I didn’t know shopping was part of the… internship. Mr. Stark keeps it pretty… undefined.  You know, and I totally get why, and I’m not complaining about it at all. That’s not what I’m saying.  I’m happy to be here and do whatever I can to help. I just didn’t think it would be… shopping buddy.”

“I’m pretty sure this falls under other duties as assigned.  But if it makes you feel any better, people have tricked me into foolish job related duties since the 40s.”

OMG he and Captain America had something in common!  Maybe it wasn’t just him and the Black Widow that were going to be SPIDER BROS.  Maybe Captain America didn’t think he was just a kid from Queens and they were going to be bros too!  He didn’t seem to hold the airport stuff against him. Not too much. He only brought it up once. Maybe twice.  The Falcon brought it up a lot more. But if Captain America thought they were just like each other… oh man, if his seven-year-old self and his Captain America lunch box could see him now.  Wait, there could be a lunch box with both Captain America AND Spider-Man on it! With their arms around each other! Giving a thumbs up!

He had to text Ned.  He’d die seeing the same look on Cap’s face as the videos.    just out w bw & cap bc we’re bff now he texted along with the picture, followed quickly by disappointed!cap is disappointed .

The response was immediate, like Peter knew it would be.

...but it wasn’t Ned.

I thought you were at Ned’s studying??

He’d accidentally texted Aunt May.

sorry!! I meant to send that to Ned

That was fine.  She knew about… all of it.  And it proved he wasn’t getting shot at or thrown off a building or any of the number of things she’d yelled at him that Mr. Start was irresponsible for letting happen to him once she found him in his suit.  And considering that that’s what he thought he’d be doing on this little outing, she should appreciate how little danger he was in compared to how much he could’ve been in if what he thought was going to happen actually had happened.  How could she object to a shopping trip… even if he had told her this morning he was spending the day with Ned working on their lab reports?

Why is Captain America disappointed with you??  What did you do?? AM I GOING TO BE DISAPPOINTED WITH YOU??

no it’s fine I didn’t do anything. I’m at my internship.

“Are you texting the girl?” Natasha asked, scaring the shit out of Peter because for some reason she was the only one who could sneak up behind him without his senses catching on.  “Is it the one who you dressed up for that you said you didn’t?”

“What? No!” Peter tried to look as casual as possible, but his phone started buzzing again.   Wait, I recognize those dressing rooms.  I’m going to give Captain America a piece of my mind.

“Is something wrong?” Steve asked, cracking open the door to the dressing room and catching the blazer Natasha decided to throw at him.  “Do we need to-”

“My aunt is coming cause I accidentally texted her, and I thought I was texting Ned cause you made the face and I thought he’d find it funny, and May’s too worried that I’ve done something to make Captain America mad at me, and I think she’s coming to yell at you, so please don’t be angry with her, she doesn’t mean it, she just… I think she likes yelling at people.  Mostly Mr. Stark,” Peter explained. “But she doesn’t yell at him a lot! Only when he shows up. Or when I come home with a bloody nose. But those aren’t always Mr. Stark’s fault.”

“Just usually,” Steve said.  “Does she… know about...”

Peter nodded.  “Yeah, she knows.”

“Maybe this is a good thing,” Natasha said.  “We could use another opinion. Because those jeans are going to make Heather in Operations -- “

“No.”

“Or how about Tonya in -”

“Natasha.”

She just smiled that MJ smile again.  Peter was certain there was no way she was giving up, and surely Cap realized that.  He could say no all he wanted, but Peter would bet money she’d have him on a date by the end of the week.  

It took 15 minutes, but eventually the back and forth interrupted by, “Peter?”

The three of them turned at the new voice and Peter gave his Aunt May the most contrite, most apologetic, most ‘but at least I’m not dangling off of a building and the highlight of the 11pm news’ wave that he could muster.  “Hi Aunt May.”

“I think you wanted to yell at him,” Natasha added motioning to Steve, who at this point was standing there with a pile of clothes draped across his arm.  

“Yes,” May said, pausing to just stare at him for a moment.  Peter was sure this wasn’t going to end well. She wasn't impressed at all with Mr. Stark each time he showed up, and sure he was the only one of the Avengers to show up at their apartment, but if she wasn’t impressed by Iron Man, surely she wasn’t going to be any more impressed by Captain America, especially once she got it into her head that he was angry with him.  “You’re a lot taller in person.”

Steve smiled.  “Yeah, I get that.  Sorry, where are my manners.  I’m Steve,” he said, extending his free hand.

May shook his hand and smiled as well.  “May Parker. You know Peter through… his internship?”

Steve nodded.  “He’s a good kid.  Quick on his feet,” he added.

“Sticks with something until it’s finished?” May volleyed back.  

“Really swings for the wall,” Steve replied, amused.  He was interrupted by Natasha clearing her throat. “Oh, and this is Natasha.”

May let go of Steve’s hand a gave the Black Widow a wave.  “Yeah.  These are not the friends I thought Peter would be hanging out with in high school,” she added.  “Or the job I thought he’d have in high school. I mean, Jesus, I worked in a grocery store in high school.”

“Oh, really?  Me too!” Steve beamed.  “And, I don’t mean to brag, but I got pretty good at stacking apples into a pyramid.”

“And there would be some ass who thought it was funny to pull the piece of fruit from the bottom of the stack?” May laughed.

“And then I’d point it out and get knocked around a bit in the alley,” Steve admitted.  “They didn’t pay me enough to put up with that kind of jerk.”

“How much did they pay you?”

He grinned.  “A quarter.”

“Oh yeah, you totally deserved at least 30 cents,” May replied.

“Yeah, that’s what FDR said too,” he laughed.

“See, May, he’s not angry at me,” Peter interjected.  He didn’t want May to get laughed at any more by Captain America, and if he could just convince her that he was fine, and Captain America wasn’t angry with him any more, and it was just a joke, she wouldn’t have to hang out in the dressing room with them any more.  “His disappointed face was for something else.”

“What was his disappointed face for, then?” May asked.

“I got tricked into going shopping,” Steve admitted.  “Natasha thought I could use some help with some new clothes and told me that Peter needed my help.”  

“And you just wanted to help him?” May asked.

“He’s a good kid,” Steve said.  “Of course I wanted to help him if he needed it.”

“Yeah, I like him.”  May turned and smiled at Peter over her shoulder.  “I think I’ll keep him.”

“So… everything’s cool,” Peter said.  “You can head home.”

“Or you could help Steve decide between a couple of shirts that he was debating,” Natasha intejected. “We could use another woman’s opinion.  I like the blue, but Steve is partial to the white.”

“Sure,” May said.  “Always glad to help.  And blue is always a good color.  Especially with your eyes,” she added.

Okay, so not how Peter saw the afternoon going.  At this rate he’d never find the right time to suggest to Natasha that they be SPIDER BROS, especially not with May bothering Captain America…

***

“May?” Peter called out as he closed the apartment door and dropped his backpack on the couch.  “I’m home.”

“How was school?” she called out from her bedroom.

“It was fine,” Peter answered.  “Sorry I’m late, we had Decathlon practice and then I had to finish my lab report with Ned.”

“Not a problem, dinner is in the fridge.  Blue lid. The spaghetti from last night.”

“Are you going somewhere?  I thought you worked days this week?”

There was a knock at the door.  “Peter, can you get that?”

“Sure.”  He opened it to find Steve standing there, in one of the outfits Natasha had bullied him into buying last Saturday.  “Hi Mr. Rogers. Hey, wait, what are you doing here? Does… does Mr. Stark need me? Did he send you to come get me? Wait, what’s going on, I can… May!” he called out.  “I’m going out-”

“Hey, no, it’s not an internship thing,” Steve said, stepping inside the apartment and closing the door behind him.  “Not an Avengers thing.”

“Oh,” Peter said.  “Then what are you doing here?”

May popped her head out into the living room and smiled.  “Hey, you found it okay.”

“Yeah,” Steve replied.  “Sorry, I’m a little early.  Never spent much time in Queens.”

“Not a problem, I’m ready to go.”  

Peter realized that May looked a lot nicer than her normal Tuesday night sweatshirt and… “Wait, where are you going?”

“Steve and I are going to grab some dinner,” May said.  “Like I said, spaghetti is in the fridge. I’ll be back in a little while.”  She kissed his forehead as she walked past. “Make good choices.”

“Good to see you, Peter,” Steve said before focusing on May.  “You look really nice.”

“Why thank you.”  She gave a quick little tug on the hemline of his t-shirt as he opened the door for her and led her out into the hall.  “Blue looks really good on you.”

It took Peter a full minute after the door closed before he was able to sputter out, “You… make good choices.”  Before he could question it any further, his phone buzzed.

Thx for your help on Sat!  Mission accomplished - FINALLY got old man out on a date

No shit, Peter thought, as he changed the name of the text thread from ‘Natasha’ to ‘SPIDER BROS’.  She could just deal with it.

[shaykeijser]

riverdale 2x16

 here are my thoughts/reactions to this weeks episode that no one asked for, which will include spoilers (obviously) so i’m putting them under the cut. i’ve already watched the episode so these aren’t my first reactions technically but they’ll be the same. 

caution: i’m not a fan of jughead or the core four. so i’ll be poking fun/getting annoyed at them.

- why did betty not go straight to alice with the dna test? why would she give chic, who she thinks is capable of hurting her, the opportunity to last out at her? i also still don’t get why she didn’t just get a normal dna test. like you’re a journalist, get the full truth, not just some of it

- i fucking called it!! why do ya think hal wanted nothing to do with chic? remember when he said “you’re letting this stranger into our house”? he wouldn’t call his own son a stranger

- fp is the dad and that’s the facts (that wouldn’t make bughead wrong don’t even try to defend that)

- chic is such a good creep IM LIVING FOR IT

- if it wasn’t a for-profit prison it wouldn’t be the worst idea. but it is so :///

- southside high was falling apart at the seems. the old students were aware of that and were plenty happy to go away! yes the lodge’s had other intentions with shutting down the school, but overall it was a good thing. there’s other, more valid reasons to not like the prisons that aren’t being talked about!!

- lol we know that veronica running for stuco wouldn’t end up well

- fred getting more screen time <333 (even if i don’t totally agree with him)

- does everybody at this school watch the same tv shows how is jughead quoting scandal (which i had to google) universally understood? i’m actually a sophomore and my friends and i quote vines.

- why isn’t ronnie defending herself? she gave that look to archie so he could defend her. where did kick ass veronica i don’t take no shit’ lodge go??

- ‘hunger strike for southside high’ BOI 

- ‘for it to re-open’ i had to pause this when i first watched this scene. he went there for like 2 weeks. toni was his only true friend for the majority of it. he didn’t like the idea of it and didn’t like what he had to do to survive there. the other students were happy with it closing!! why you gotta be so extra?? and if he really wants to get out of riverdale to be a writer he shouldn’t be trying to go back to a school that had teachers who gave up hope on their students

- ew ethel (i was eh with her all together but i’m still >:( over how she got mad at veronica for what hiram did to her father. veronica was one of the only people who was comforting her and tried to make amends. we can’t forget that when that all was going down veronica didn’t like her dad)

- WHY ARE KEVIN AND JOSIE SITTING ALONE

- wait jk i remembered 

- HAHAHA ok i’m josie (don’t get me wrong i like veronica and is the only tolerable lead for me atm but that slushie thing is really funny. it was sorta uncalled for, but she is working with her father soz)

- props to veronica for being the bigger person in this scenario

- 'what are the odds your father’s gonna be the first inmate in that prison?’ #boomroasted #thatwasatheofficereference #didanyonegetit

- lol at least veronica kept her cool for a little bit (go her btw)

- MY POOR CHERYL NO

- mama blossom is shady and nana rose is sassy

- that tea’s gonna be poison i’m calling it

- why would ethel’s dad want a job at the prison? he was a businessman

- veronica’s own parents are threatening her UGH

- power to veronica for wanting to run but this isn’t gonna end well

- TONI’S HOT & even if her audition flopped cheryl still would’ve made her member #lovemybabies

- tbh i didn’t like the lodges being the main plot point and i’d still prefer for the serpents to get more screentime than them BUT this is getting interesting

- drag him archie

- i want to see other south siders fighting for this why does jughead get to be the leader of this revolution (that i’m here for!! except for the school thing bc it doesn’t make sense)

- y’all have been having friendship problems since the ms. gr**** thing i think the trains have been getting closer than you think jug

- FINALLY, THE CHONI I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR

- something bad is gonna happen to cheryl i’m calling it, and nana rose

- (about what betty said after cheryl opened up) betty let chic into her and her family’s life can she not just be cautious from a distance and let her mom enjoy having her son back

- of course toni’s in the bed you sly little bird cheryl

- y’all gonna fuck? kidding this the cw that’s only for het couples

- THEY GONNA KISS AWE

- ok fuck why can’t we have some happiness for once

- penelope and claudius pushed her, i mean penelope had obviously prepared a back up plan incase she didn’t die (mentioning sundowners syndrome)

- #ProtectCherylBlossom

- aw archie’s mom is back i’m happy 

- YES SCHOOL THAT BOY FOR DISRESPECTING FRED GO MAMA ANDREWS

- charles melton looks really hot with a bruised face oi oi (so does jordan connor)

- that lowkey sounds like a bribe veronica.... 

- fang, toni, and pea are in this scene?? new favorite scene

- honestly, if any other serpent was the one in jugheads spot i think i would be all for it lmao

- i thought mary (andrews) was gonna also give archie the safe sex talk that he archie never got dang

- mary’s giving good advice though let’s just hope archie will listen to it

- I LOVE KEVIN 

- kevin had the right to tell chic, she was the one who forced him into the poorly planned catfishing (like seriously - she shouldn’t have been there and they shouldn’t have done it at a school). kevin has barely got any good storylines that actually continue and i’m so damn happy that he’s sticking up for himself. betty only reaches out to him when she needs help.

- betty talking about her darkness and saying ‘darkness’ in general is the most cringey thing ever. she has some sort of mental illness. i don’t know what but they shouldn’t have taken this ‘darkness inside of me’ approach.

- i wish V tried to become josie’s friend before asking her for an endorsement. actually, i wish the show resolved their friendship ages ago. they’re the one of the few WOC and overall i’m tired of girl x girl friendships being ruined like this

- it’s got so bad that veronica had to bribe josie to endorse her. i know this isn’t gonna go well

- sweet pea looking like an out of focus snack <333

- DRAG HIM JUGHEAD (lol you can tell how much i don’t like archie being up hiram’s ass that i’m praising jughead)

- give betty cooper therapy, you cowards

- ‘i caught the black hood’ bitch no you didn’t that hoe still out there & i’m taking that theory to the grave

- sheriff keller woah i forgot about him

- my boy fp!!

- omfg imagine when betty tells jughead that chic’s dad isn’t hal they better have him be like “...what if it’s mine” (i just realized that sorta sounds like jughead saying ‘what if the kid aka chic is mine’ and that’s not what i meant, i meant that chic’s dad is jughead’s dad but that made me laugh so i’m keeping it)

- oh sHIT something’s gonna happen @ this concert/rally for veronica’s campaign thing

- kevin’s filming it yeps something’s happening

- ope i knew it ethel is passing papers out 

- woop there it is

- i don’t ~really~ get why betty’s mad 

- JOSIE’S APART OF IT WTF I DIDN’T SEE THAT COMING but i should have :(

- this show tries to be all about female empowerment but then they have two girls banding together to bully an already manipulated and hurting girl. smh

- again, i don’t ~really~ get why betty can’t trust her anymore

- :((( i feel so bad for ronnie. she’s being manipulated by her parents and i really want her out of lodge industries. she’s taking blame for the shit that her parents have done

- THIS IS WHAT I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR

- HAHAHAA THE WIG OH MY GOD

- “i was guessing” congrats betty, you’ve played yourself

- the offer that hiram made to fp actually sounds nice :((( if only he wasn’t so shady 

- archie is so far up hiram’s ass he sounds exactly like him

- YOU GO MARY! SCHOOL YO CHILD

- finally a parent (alice) talks bout safe sex to their kid (betty)!!! my mom is gonna be so happy when she watches this episode (yes i watch riverdale with my mom, no it’s not awkward during sex scenes because we watch every show together so we’re used to it)

- “absolutely not.” keep telling that to yourself alice

- alice cooper is my favorite cooper

- “he’s dangerous.” bitch so are you? you held a lighter up to his face?

- i thought alice killed that drug dealer is that what betty is saying he did

- cheryl doesn’t have red lipstick on in this hospital scene something’s gonna happen

- nana was being poisoned by the tea :((

- i guess i’m remembering this wrong i thought alice shot him (about the scene in chic’s room)

- how did betty not remember that he didn’t touch anything

- CHERYL DROP AND ROLL OUT OF THAT CAR NOW

- look at archie being all smart aw

- why is betty next to kevin?? stay away from my baby (kevin)

- this scene is actually really powerful? even though them chaining themselves to the school is a repetitive and cliche thing to do, the aesthetics and the filming of it is really cool

- can we see all those young serpents more often pls

- what is jughead talking about why does he think they’re gonna lose riverdale high? is it because of veronica running? bc no one’s gonna vote for her after those flyers

- uGH i can see him being a good president

- why is betty so done with her and veronica’s friendship? i really don’t get why she’s so mad at her?

- jughead, betty, and fp all living together. that’s a concept

- SOMEONE WRITE A HEADCANON OF ALICE BUSTING INTO THE TRAILER TO GET BETTY BACK AND THEN WE GET SOME CUTE FALICE ANGST

- i’m happy mary’s staying bc maybe with her around we’ll get more fred screen time #canyoutellilovefred

- FUCK YEAH FRED IS RUNNING

- toni topaz is the caring type of girlfriend who goes to her girl’s house when they aren’t in school pass it on!!

- but really though where is cheryl what are they doing to her

- CHERYL DOESN’T DESERVE THIS SHE’S BEEN EMOTIONALLY ABUSED FOR YEARS AND HAS LOST A BROTHER, FATHER, AND BEST FRIEND 

main takeaways

~ veronica is being manipulated by her parents and doesn’t deserve half of the shit that’s getting thrown at her

~ jughead is still cringey and extra

~ toni is the girlfriend of all of our dreams let’s be honest here

~ cheryl blossom doesn’t deserve this bullshit

~ betty cooper is mentally ill

~ chic is fp and alice’s son

~ #FredForMayor

[suspiciousgay]

For the ask thing, all 100