#this course makes me wanna die I should have never taken it

[bonyassfish]

This prof wants us to use generative ai (because for some fucking reason they all have a hard on for it???)) and I am refusing. Just straight up. I basically wrote that I’m perfectly fine with a lower score on this assignment if it means I’m not wasting water so you can pat yourself on the back for being up to the latest technology you prick

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Growing

Summary: After a concerning phone call from his daughter's Principal, Javi goes to find out the true reason why she's really there in the first place.

Word Count: 4.1K

Pairing: Dad!Javi x Wife!reader (No use of y/n)

Warnings: Honestly this is all fluff 😭 Misogyny, dress codes being the dumbest thing in the world, Javi going full dad mode ™️, Javi being the best girl dad, Sappy Dad Javi loving his daughters so much

A/N: This story is inspired by this ask and what started as a short little snippet ended up being 4k long 🥴 I've written so much for Javi being a dad to his younger daughters, but I will fight anyone who says he isn't the best girl dad at every phase of life his daughters are in 🥺 Javi loves all his daughters equally, but I just know he and Lucy have such a special bond and it makes me wanna cry and scream all at once. I ain't gonna lie, ya girl shed a few tears with this one 🥲 oldest daughters with emotionally unavailable fathers gang rise

Series Masterlist Never Too Late Masterlist

“It should be fucking illegal to work when it’s this hot.” 

“How long have you lived in Texas for, you fucking moron? Of course it’s hot. It’s Texas. Stop bitching, you baby.” 

“Oh shut up. You’re telling me you're comfortable right now?” 

“No, you idiot. It’s hot as Satan’s asshole in here. Of course I’m not. But whining isn’t gonna make it not hot.” 

“I know it’s not. Just let me complain, okay? Fuck, I honestly may take Satan’s asshole over this…” 

While no one at the Laredo Sheriff’s department was a stranger to the sweltering Texas heat, even Javi couldn’t argue with his fellow co-workers that for a morning in late May, there was no denying it was already miserably hot outside. 

He had just finished getting an earful about the topic from his daughters this morning during school drop-off, complaining that they may actually die of heat stroke before the day is done, and that his youngest, Harper, may die from “smelly boy sweat”, since no boy in the 7th grade was wearing enough deodorant as they should be (and that, he couldn’t argue). 

“Cater’s right, Miller. Complaining isn’t helping you get all your shit done, and I need that file by the end of the day.” Javi grumbled, surprising Agent Carter and Miller as he passed their desks on the way to his office, making the pair raise their hands in defense in justification of their weather woes. 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, don’t worry, it’ll be done before the end of the day. If I don’t melt into a puddle first…” Agent Miller grumbled, sticking his face back into the piles of papers scattered across his desk. 

While he would never give his co-workers the satisfaction of knowing he was just as irritated by the early onset heatwave as they were, Javi’s suit jacket was already shed and sleeves were rolled up past his elbows before he had barely made it through his office door. 

As he took a seat at his desk, looking over his list of to-do’s for today, he was taken aback to hear the aggressive ringing of his phone this early, wondering what could have already gone so wrong that someone already needed to get a hold of him.   

Ring, ring, ringggggg. Ring, ring, ringggg-

“Laredo Sheriff’s Department, this is Peña.” 

“Hi Mr. Peña. This is Mr. Wilson, Assistant Principal over at United High School.” 

Javi sat up just a little straighter in his desk chair, running his hand over the back of his neck, a jolt of nerves hitting his stomach like he was the one being called down to the principal’s office. 

Javi had gotten plenty of phone calls from his daughter’s school throughout the years. Calls to pick one of them up and take them home because they were sick, forgotten lunchboxes and school projects, one justified elementary school fist fight- Javi had pretty much heard it all. 

Now that your daughters had reached middle school and high school, the calls home now came few and far between, and most of the time, came from the girls themselves on their own phones, more often than not, in the form of your middle daughter, Elliot, asking if he would come pick her up because school was “the most boring place on earth”. 

He took a moment to try and compose himself, knowing that if one of the girls was sick, they would have texted him, or would have gotten a call from an office secretary, and last time he checked, Assistant Principals weren’t calling parents in the middle of a work day just to sprinkle in some good news. 

So what in the hell was he calling for? 

“Uh, H-hi, Mr. Wilson. Can I ask, um, what uh- what’s the reason for the phone call? Is everything okay?” 

“Well Mr. Peña, I’m calling because I’m here with your daughter. Unfortunately, she’s here after a teacher referral for disrespectful and defiant behavior.” 

Javi could feel his brow furrow and face scrunch in genuine confusion, practically left speechless by Mr. Wilson’s statement. Sure, his daughter Elliot was going through a little bit of a “phase” right now, but even though she had come out of the womb with an iron will power and enough sass to fuel a small country, she knew better than to talk back to adults, especially her teachers. 

“Are- Are you serious? I’m really sorry, Mr. Wilson. Could you um- What did Elliot do?” 

“Oh, I’m sorry, I should have clarified. While I have had the… pleasure…. of meeting your daughter, Elliot, she’s not the one I’m calling about. Mr. Peña, I’m calling about your daughter, Lucy.” 

If the phone call itself wasn’t already enough to knock Javi on his ass, that statement sure as hell was. 

“Lucy? There’s no fucking way.” He thought to himself. 

In all 12 years Lucy had been in school, the worst thing any teacher had ever had to say about your oldest daughter was that she was an overachiever. Lucy was your classic, type-A oldest daughter- She was a straight A student, captain of her soccer team, a member of every club under the sun, and most importantly, was the kindest kid a parent could ask for. Lucy lived by the rules, so the fact that she went out of her way to break one, let alone be disrespectful about it? Something wasn’t adding up. 

“I… Mr. Wilson, I’m sorry, I don’t wanna be rude, but- are you sure you’ve got the right kid?” Javi stammered, still in shock from what he had just heard, wondering when someone was going to walk in and tell him this was some sort of weird prank. 

“Oh yes, I’m sure. Mr. Peña, I think it may be best if you and your wife just come down to the school to talk about this.” 

“Um, my- my wife is out of town helping her dad out after surgery but uh- yeah, I’ll um, I’ll be there in the next uh- shit…” He muttered, looking down at his watch, quickly calculating in his brain, “the next 30 minutes?” 

“Great. We’ll see you then, Mr. Peña. Goodbye.” 

“B-bye.” 

Javi sat there for a moment, phone still held to his ear as the dial tone rang, shooting in one ear and out the other as he tried to process what had just happened. He shook his head, trying to snap himself out of his confusion enough to let his nerves take over, frantically scrambling to grab his things before storming out of the office even faster than he had entered a few moments ago. 

As soon as he was in the car, Javi was frantically dialing your number, backing out of his parking spot and pulling out onto the road like he was being called for some sort of life threatening emergency. 

“C’mon, pick up, pick up, pick up…” Javi huffed, anxiously tapping his fingers against his steering wheel, waiting for you to answer.

“Hey, honey! What’s up? Hold on- yes, it’s Javi. Okay. I- yes, I will. All my family says hi and that we miss you! What’s going on?” You answered, an unsuspecting cheer in your tone, just happy to hear his voice. 

“Uh- yeah, tell them, I- yeah, I say hi, too.” Javi responded, clearly frazzled and distracted as he sped down the road, wishing he would have taken a police squad car instead of his truck to get to Lucy’s school sooner. 

“Javi, what’s going on? Are you okay?”  You asked, clearly sensing the concern in his voice. 

“I just got a call from the Assistant Principal that Lucy is down in the office because she got a referral for being defiant and disrespectful.” 

“Wait, you mean Elliot?” 

“No. Lucy.” 

“Oh shit.” 

“That’s what I thought, too.” 

“Did they tell you why? Or what happened? That doesn’t seem like her at all. She- she knows better than that? And how much trouble she’d be in?” 

“No, I’m going down to the school right now. If I wasn’t already sweating bad enough because it’s hot as fuck here today, I sure fucking am now.” Javi grumbled, pushing up his sleeves further before wiping the sweat accumulating on his forehead, sticking his dark curls to his skin. 

“Hey, hey, Jav. I’m sure it will be okay. I’m sure there’s gotta be a reason. Take a few deep breaths, okay? Please just keep me posted.” 

“Okay. I-I will.” 

“It’ll be okay, Papa Bear. I love you.” 

“Love you too.” 

With a quick beep on the other end of the phone, Javi set down his phone in his lap, wrapping his fingers around the wheel with an iron grip and clenching his jaw until it hurt, turning on the radio as loud as it could go to drown out the “what-if’s” dancing around his mind in what was going to be the world’s longest 10 minute drive to United High School. 

Javi had found himself in plenty of stressful situations throughout his life. Hell, stress was a given working as a DEA agent in Colombia trying to take down the biggest drug lords of the 20th century. Yet somehow, Javi found himself just as nervous, if not more, as he walked into the main office of Lucy’s high school, trying to figure out what she had done that was worthy of a trip to the Assistant Principal. 

After some directions from one of the secretaries, Javi found Mr. Wilson’s office door, giving it a few raps before it was answered by a short and stout older man, his poorly balding head adorned with a limited amount of scraggly gray hairs and face painted with an unamused half-smile. 

“Mr. Peña? Please, come in and take a seat.” Mr. Wilson sighed, gesturing to an open chair next to his daughter, sitting with her arms crossed over her chest and eyes peeled to the floor, seemingly trying to shrink herself as small as possible into her chair. 

Before Javi could even ask Lucy what was going on or if she was okay, Mr. Wilson had already begun on his rant, promptly taking a seat behind his desk with a deep sigh, forcing the attention onto him. 

“Well Mr. Peña, I’m sorry to have to call you in from your job, but I felt that this was something that more than warranted a parental visit. As if it wasn’t bad enough she is already deliberately breaking our school’s dress code, Lucy's already been one of several students down here today who have had the audacity to argue with both teachers and myself about the issue.” 

Just as Javi was about to speak, he stopped himself in disbelief, trying to process what he had just heard, looking over at Lucy, trying to hold back her tears before turning back to Mr. Wilson. 

“I’m- I’m sorry, I think I must be missing something. This is about what Lucy’s wearing?” Javi asked, scratching the back of his head in confusion. 

“Yes.” Mr. Wilson replied, almost annoyed that Javi’s immediate response was shock, rather than anger. “Our dress code clearly states that girls may not wear shorts below fingertip length or tank tops that are less than 3 fingers thick across the strap. It’s a distraction for both male staff and students. As your daughter is a Junior, this rule should come as no surprise to her. On top of this, she and a few other girls in the hallway this morning were written up for resisting coming to the office after teachers on dress code duty had written them up.” 

Javi had to visibly shake his head, trying to make sure he had really understood what he had just heard as his jaw hung open in disbelief. He took a deep breath, trying not to laugh to himself out of shock and building anger, asking one more time to make sure he truly comprehended this was the reason for the phone call this morning. 

“I’m sorry, I really think I must not be understanding this.” 

“That’s not what happened…” Lucy quietly piped in, eyes still glued to the floor. 

“Please, Ms. Peña, why don’t you enlighten us, then?” Mr. Wilson replied, a sarcastic delight in his tone. 

“I was on my way to second period when I got stopped by one of the teachers in the hallway. She told me that she needed to measure my tank top and shorts to make sure they were up to dress code. I knew they were kinda short but it’s like, a million degrees outside today and everyone is miserable because the air conditioning doesn’t work in half the rooms on the second floor.” Lucy paused, sitting up a little taller in her chair, looking over at her dad, her face filled riddled with guilt. Javi looked back at her, quietly nodding in reassurance for her to keep going. 

“But um, the teacher said that my shorts were too short, and that I needed to go to the office so they could write me a dress code referral. But I had a huge presentation that I’ve been working on that I was supposed to give today for my second period science class, and Ms. Feltmate told us that if we miss the presentation portion of our project, we get an automatic 20% reduction in our grade. I’ve worked so hard on that project, and I told the teacher in the hallway I couldn’t go because I’d miss my presentation. She told me she didn’t care, and that I should have known better, and then I told her it wasn’t fair that she’s going to ruin my grade on this project because of my shorts when literally everyone in the school is breaking dress code today because it’s so hot out. I tried to tell her I’d even go before 3rd period so I didn’t have to miss my presentation but she told me she didn’t believe me and that she was going to write me up. So, I’ve been down here until you came. I’m- I’m sorry, Dad.” 

At this point, tears were welling in Lucy’s eyes, her voice quivering and bottom lip trembling, trying to keep from completely sobbing in front of her Dad and Assistant Principal, looking up at Javi with regret and shame for what she’d done. 

If Javi wasn’t upset before his daughter’s testimony, now, he was absolutely fuming. Javi was using every ounce of composure he had left to keep from completely exploding as he readjusted himself in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest as he locked eyes with Mr. Wilson. 

“Mr. Wilson, what period should Lucy be in right now?” Javi asked, trying to keep as calm as possible while he waited for Mr. Wilson’s surprised response. 

“Uh- I believe 4th period just started? Why?” 

“So you mean to tell me, Mr. Wilson, that not only has my daughter missed out on a huge presentation that she has spent countless hours working on, she’s also missed out on two other classes because you think that keeping her here in your office because of her shorts is more important than her learning?” 

Mr. Wilson stared back at Javi in a silent shock, taken aback that he was in fact, not on his side at all, and was seconds away from absolutely ripping him a new one for what he had done to his daughter. 

“Well, y-yes, but-” Mr. Wilson stammered, trying to rebuttal. 

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. I’m sorry, Mr. Wilson, but this is the goddamn stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Lucy is a straight A student. She cares more about school than any kid I’ve ever met. She is smart, and hard working, and the fact that you wanna actively punish her for that just because she’s wearing shorts when it’s the hottest damn day of the year is absolutely fucking ridiculous. Second of all, if playing dress code police is more important to you than girls going to class because some teenage creeps, better yet, staff members can’t keep it in their pants, you’ve got a way bigger issue on your hands than what my daughter chooses to wear to school.”  

A stark silence hung in the air for a moment filled with mixture of Javi’s fumes, Lucy’s shock and surprise, and Mr. Wilson’s overwhelming embarrassment at the situation he had brought upon himself. Before Mr. Wilson could even try to muster out some sort of defense, Javi was already standing up out of his chair, nudging Lucy to do the same. 

“Grab your stuff, Lu, we’re going.” 

“Mr. Peña, let me assure you that-” 

“Mr. Wilson, the only thing you need to assure me is that you’re going to explain to her teacher where Lucy was wasting her time this morning so she can give her presentation for full credit, and that I’m not gonna hear from you again in regards to what my kid wears to school when it’s 105 degrees outside. Have a nice day.” 

Without another word, Javi was already halfway out the door, Lucy quickly following behind him as he signed her out for the rest of the day before silently storming out to his truck slamming the door behind him as Lucy sheepishly crawled into the passenger side, setting her backpack between her feet. 

“Dad, I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to-” 

“Lu, I’m not mad at you. You have nothing to apologize for. You think I’d be upset with you because of that?” 

“Well, I don’t know, I mean, I did technically break the rules, and you had to leave work to come here, and-” 

“Hey.” Javi paused, putting a hand on Lucy’s shoulder, getting her to take her eyes out of her lap and look at him, “Lucy, I’m proud of you. You stood up for yourself for something that was clearly important to you when you knew what other people were doing wasn’t right. I could never be mad at you for that.” 

Finally, a small smile pursed the edges of Lucy’s lips, shrugging her shoulders to try and play off her dad’s compliment, even though they both knew Javi was more than right to be proud of what his daughter had done. 

“Thanks, Dad.” 

“Of course, Lu. I’m being serious though, what you did takes a lotta balls. You should be proud of yourself.” Javi smiled, giving Lucy a little nudge with the hand still placed on her shoulder. 

“Ew, Dad, gross.” Lucy sighed, rolling her eyes as she playfully shoved her Dad’s arm off her, the pair quietly laughing to themselves. 

“You promise I’m not in trouble?” Lucy asked again, raising an eyebrow at her dad. 

“The only punishment I’m making you endure is forcing you to spend some time with your old man for the rest of the day.” Javi smirked, fastening his seatbelt before looking over his shoulder to back out of his haphazard park job. 

“Could be worse.” Lucy teased, giving her Dad a little shrug, secretly excited that not only had her Dad stood up for her without a second thought, but was letting her ditch school to spend time together. While at the ripe age of 17, she wouldn’t admit it out loud, Lucy knew how lucky she was to have a dad like hers. “Do we have to listen to your old man music while we drive, or is that also part of the punishment?” 

“Yup. No Jonas Brothers for this drive, Lucy Lu.” 

“Dad, I haven’t listened to the Jonas Brothers in years. I don’t even like them anymore.” Lucy laughed, cringing at Javi’s presumed music interests for her. “That’s okay, I don’t mind your old man music. You’re better than Mom. She’s been on a huge ABBA kick every time we drive to soccer practice, and if I hear “Gimmie, Gimmie, Gimmie” one more time, my ears may bleed.” 

Reaching over the center console Lucy grabbed the aux cord, plugging in her phone, scrunching her face in concentration as she scrolled through a few different playlists until landing on something that seemed to fit the bill, setting her phone in her lap while turning up the volume. 

Dun. 

Dunnnadnun. 

Dunanun.  

Javi couldn’t help but smile at Lucy’s pick of “Back in Black” by AC/DC, one of Lucy’s favorite songs her and Javi would listen to on her drives hockey practices and games when she was little, claiming the song gave her special powers to “kick boys butts” when she played. 

“Damn, you must really want me to kick your ass in putt putt, huh?” Javi teased, hinting at his makeshift plans for the rest of the afternoon. 

“Really? That's what we're doing? Dad, no offense, but you suck at putt putt. Are you trying to make this easy for me? Because if that’s the case, then I’ll start planning my flavor choice for my extra scoop of winner’s ice cream now.” 

“Whatever you say, smartass.” 

After 18 holes of mini-golf, Javi couldn’t even pretend that he put up a fight against Lucy, admitting in defeat that he didn’t even stand a chance against her, not even foregoing bribery to get her to throw away his embarrassingly high score card as proof of his loss. 

Per tradition in the Peña household, Lucy rightfully earned her extra scoop of ice cream at Eva’s Dairy Barn for her impressive putt putt victory, her and Javi settling in on their favorite bench by the little stream that ran behind the ice cream shop, where their family had spend more than their fair share of time enjoying their favorite treats while stomping and splashing in the creek. 

“Victory sure does taste sweet.” Lucy joked, sticking her tongue out at Javi as she bit into her ice cream, Javi rolling his eyes at her even though she had every right to give him shit after his terrible performance. 

“Well if you can find a college with a putt putt scholarship, that’s the place to go.” Javi smiled before the pair went quiet, the reality of knowing Lucy would be seriously starting to look at colleges soon weighing heavy in his throat and deep in his chest. “Have you uh, thought anymore about schools you like?” He asked, trying his best to sound nonchalant, rather than the complete and utter terror he really felt. 

“I don’t know… a lot of people from school are talking about going to Texas Tech or Texas A&M… I think I like Texas A&M but, I don’t know, it’s just….” Lucy paused, taking a deep breath, anxiously twiddling with her fingers. 

“Just what, Lu?” 

“It’s almost 6 hours away. I know it’s not really that far but, I don’t know… I’m just really worried that I’ll miss you guys. Don’t tell Elliot and Harper I said that.” 

It took everything in Javi not to melt into a weepy, sobbing mess right then and there on that bench, wondering how yesterday, he was bringing Lucy home from the hospital, scared shitless on how in the world he was going to be a father, let alone a half decent one, and now, here Lucy was, nearly an adult who had blossomed into the most wonderful daughter he could have asked for, and was getting ready to leave for college. 

Wrapping his arm over Lucy’s shoulder, she let her head fall next to his, sitting for a moment in a thoughtful silence before Javi spoke. 

“No matter where you go or what you do, you know that we’ll always be there for you, right? Even when you’re sick of us. You’re an amazing kid, Lu. We’re all so proud of you. I’m so proud of you. We’ll be there for you even if you’re on the other end of the earth if that’s where you wanna go. I love you, kiddo.” 

“Love you too, Dad.” 

Javi couldn’t help but reach up to wipe the tears welling in his eyes with the back of his hand after a quick kiss on Lucy's forehead, making Lucy laugh as she tried to hide the tears of her own. 

“Dad, are you crying?” 

“No… A little… I’m just really pissed you beat me at mini golf, okay?” Javi joked, trying to use a little humor before he became a total sap. “Alright, we should probably head home before Elliot and Harper get too suspicious.” 

“Not looking forward to the 10 pounds of shit they’re gonna give me when I found out I got called down to the principal's office.” 

“Don’t worry, I’m sure Elliot will happily triple your visits by the time she’s your age. As for Harper, God, I honestly worry she’s gonna be calling the principal down to see her.” 

“Is this your subtle way of telling me I’m your favorite child?” 

“No, this is my subtle way of thanking you that despite your run in with the pants police today, you’re the one I’m least worried about having to bail out of jail one day. Don’t tell them I said that.” 

“Your secret’s safe with me, Dad.”  

Taglist:

@chaotic-iguana @rhoorl @bbiophiliaa @purpleprincess75 @angelofsmalldeath-codeine

@pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24

@3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85

@partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo

@endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @milly-louise

@jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled

@pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @vee-bees-blog

@hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @msmorningstaarr

@amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild

@copperhalfcent @theoraekenslover @bloodyinspirationaldemon @vee-bees-blog

@samgirl4life @pigeonmama @survivingandenduring @itsokbbygrl @javierpena-inatacvestnotifs

@purpleprincess75

[rsatoru]

dumbfounded, “satoru-” you whimper, struggling trying to find room to breathe, trying to suppress a moan. “what the fuck?” it’s hot, you feel your body on fire. every touch sends a shiver down your spine. the intensity overwhelms you, your thoughts are spiraling out of control, yet—you can’t help but crave more.

your room is big, the bedroom the both of you share. it’s cold, the ac is on, there’s so much empty space—you could run around if you wanted, maybe even play soccer when boredom hits. but when it’s just the two of you, sitting on the edge of the headboard of your king-sized bed, you could probably die from suffocation. it’s like the two of you have taken up every inch of space possible.

but of course, it only applies when you’re making out with him. or maybe, during times when he’s feeling extra kinky, he could just choke you til you meet your death. but like the man he is, he would never hurt his baby like that!! ♡

he’s so close—you feel like both of your skins could just collide, you feel like you’re being pressed against the edge of a cliff, every inch of space has been consumed by him. your is mind hazy. your clit is throbbing. yeah, he's definitely going to be the death of you.

making out with satoru is not for the weak.

“oh” satoru smirks, “oh dear. my baby’s injured.” staring at your lips with that dumbass smug grin on his face. “yeah, your baby’s idiot of a boyfriend bit her lips too hard they started bleeding.” rolling your eyes.

“’s cute” he teases, what a cocky bastard.

“cute my ass. it’s bleeding, satoru. they feel sore.” “maybe i should just stop spoiling you so much and avoid makeout sessions.” you hiss with a not-so amused look on your face

“rest your pretty face on this one baby,” he murmurs. without a moment’s hesitation, he licks your lips. “sweet” he mumbles under his breath, licking his lips. about to utter something—you were cut off guard, “hah—satoru, mm,” moaning the moan you were trying to suppress. keyword: trying, woops!

“don’t ya worry about anything baby—maybe i’ll suck all the pain out they’ll feel less sore, yeah?” oh, he’s so agitating. oh, you wanna have all of his children right this instant.

your pleasure and pain blend together, painfully, you can’t deny—you’re actually enjoying this. who were you to resist him anyway? who would make complaints about something so irresistible?

“oh my god, satoru, if you don’t fuck me senseless already i’ll—”

“oh, my needy baby. so impatient. i always get you what you want, don’t i?” and he’s right—he does. he always does. in fact, he gets you way more than what you asked for. he always went beyond your wildest dreams.

this is seriously so so bad. in all seriousness, please don’t ever let me pick up writing tools ever again. 🫶

[rekino2114]

Fem. Gojo showing you her domain

You were lying on your bed mindlessly watching videos until you heard a tap on your window. You went in front of it, readying your cursed technique in case it was an enemy. After what happened with toji you were not going to take any more chances. You were very relieved to see it was just your girlfriend. You opened the window and let her come in

"Oh, satori, what are you doing here?"

"What? Can't a girl visit her boyfriend once in a while?"

"I meant why were you outside my window?"

"Your dorm is on the second floor, and I just got back from a training session. No way I'm gonna do all those stairs"

"It's like two flights, and you thought floating was easier?"

"Hey I got my technique I'm gonna use it"

"Whatever, anyway so why did you wanna visit?"

"Oh yeah, I got something super cool to show you"

She smiled brightly and pointed at herself in a dramatic manner

"Guess who just perfected her domain expansion?"

"....For real?"

"For real real, it took training and a lot of mochis to power up but I finally did it"

"That's so cool, tori. domain expansions are the peak of jujutsu, I'm so proud of you"

"Well, of course I'd be able to do it sooner or later, I am the strongest after all but thanks for the praise"

"Don't mention it"

"Soooo are you ready to see it or what?"

"Won't it hurt me?"

"Nah, it's a non lethal domain.......kinda"

"....that's not really reassuring"

"Come on, don't you trust me? It's beautiful to look at, it's gonna be a nice date place"

"*sighs* fine but if I die my ghost will haunt you forever"

"Don't worry, I'll never let anything happen to you"

You were slightly taken aback by her serious tone, but she quickly went back to her silly self as she smiled again, put her hands together, and disappeared, you sighed and waited for a few seconds before she reappeared with an embarrassed expression on her face

"S-sorry, I forgot you can't-"

"It's fine let's just go"

You went outside (using the door this time), and in the courtyard, gojo stood near you and held your hand

"You gotta keep holding my hand. If you don't, then you might be in a coma for a couple of months k?"

".....what?"

"Don't worry, it'll be fine. You can hug me if you're really worried, I certainly wouldn't complain~"

"*sighs* just get on with it"

She smiled again and took off her shades, revealing the blue eyes you loved to stare at, put them in her pockets, and did her domain hand sign with her free hand.

"Domain expansion: infinite void"

Suddenly, black filled your vision as you got transported into her domain, an endless plane of black with white spots, satori's grip on you tightened as she looked back at you

"Soooo what do you think? Pretty nice to look at isn't it?"

"Yeah, it's beautiful, but I guess it was guaranteed that a beautiful girl like you would have a beautiful domain"

"Eh, such a charmer. You're gonna make me blush if you continue"

You sat down, and she did the same. Her hand made its way up your body until it reached your shoulder. She pulled you into a side hug and layed her head on your shoulder

"You know I love you right?"

"Yeah you tell me that every day"

"No, I mean like love, love you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me"

"*giggle* really? The great satori gojo loves me this much? I'm honored"

"You should be, but seriously, after geto left, you're the only person I have left. Sure, I have shoko, but to be honest, I don't think she cares that much about me. Even if she did, she can't really understand me.....sometimes I feel so...lonely"

You silently side hugged her back as you saw her blue eyes become slightly lucid while looking around

"I guess it's fitting that my domain is a big empty void cause that's where I feel like I'm in sometimes........"

"Except when I'm with you of course"

You turned to see her smiling brightly and staring at you lovingly

"You're what keeps me going. You're someone that i know will never leave me. i love you so much"

"I love you too"

You two kissed passionately and looked at each other with pure love

"Alright, I think that was enough. If I keep my domain going for longer, I might get tired, I'll undo it now"

She did as she said and put her shades back on

"How about we go out to eat? It's almost dinnertime and there's a really good spot around here"

"Sure if we bring megumi and tsumiki too"

"Uh?..........dammit I forgot about them....do you think they'll be mad at me?"

"*sighs* you're such a mess of a mom, we can buy them some toys on the way home, maybe they'll forgive you then"

"Great idea, you're a life saver babe"

"It's nothing. Let's just go"

She dragged around as you brought the toys and food for your adopted children.

No matter what happened, you would stick by gojo's side, and she would, of course, do the same

[hmshermitcraft]

Oh gosh I am so incredibly new to hermitshipping/hermitcraft in general but mumscarian has taken over my life for the past two days, its all I've been reading and especially the vampire!mumbo and harpy!grian headcanons are stuck in my brain like, gosh I dont even know where they originate from i havent been here for long whxhwhhd

But possessive vampire mumbo coupled with even more possessive harpy grian, and a very confused and maybe slightly oblivious scar in the middle? But also scar realizing later and like, being just as possessive over them???? And all those fae/elven!scar headcanons are so nice, i love them so much bc hes so pretty

Makes me scream into my pillow and its so funny to me, oh my gosh its so funny

Like like-

Mumbo and Grian: Someone is going to die-

Scar: of fun!

I apologize for going in here to rant about this but I have literally no other place to go to bdhehxhhshdd

Also for the pillow talk thingy!

Just all of them like, cuddling and talking about what they want to build tomorrow, all of them laughing about pranks they pulled (like the Buttercup stuff they did to prank Doc which is so hilarious to me) and just talking about things to do, stuff to see, just living their best lives out here and damn if i dont wanna see em do exactly that!!!

The problem is, of course, that Scar's idea of 'fun' is somehow more unhinged than both Mumbo and Grian's. His standard of 'normal' is way way off. Somebody is going to die and at this rate it is going to be Scar- they looked away for one minute what is he doing?!

Scar always seems to turn out fine. They can never tell if they should be angry about this or relieved.

Thankfully, nighttime is when they get to see Scar actually relax. Grian curls up against his chest whilst Scar lies in Mumbo's lap. And Scar talks about the future, all the plans he has and things he wants to do and they are both so in love with him. They laugh and reminisce and scheme and it all feels perfect.

Scar usually falls asleep first. Mumbo and Grian share relieved smiles that are sickeningly full of love.

[hilarychuff]

For a second, an ugly, mean, bitter part of him cranks the metallic screech of microphone feedback in his head to full volume. Because of course. Of course. Of course Chrissy Cunningham is literally lying here with him in his van, wearing her cheer uniform and tracing a finger across his chest — something he’s never even dared to let himself dream of — and he’s already lost her. Of course she’s headed straight from Wanna Be Golden Boy Carver into the arms of Steve The Hair Harrington. Not that that doesn’t make about a thousand times more sense. The idea that the queen would ever actually deign to fraternize with the freak is laughable, really. Which he probably should’ve known from the second she asked him if she could buy some drugs. This is a criminal transaction. Has been the whole time. God forbid he ever for a second take for granted that most people in this fucking small ass hick ass bitch ass town might ever look at him and be able to see something more than that degenerate Munson kid, more likely to end up in prison with his pop than he is to ever graduate high school, though if he ain’t beating the odds so far with those extra two years of trying — “Lunch with the queen of Hawkins High must be a hot ticket,” he spits sullenly. “Please don’t tell me Buckley landed that invite by trading a date with King Steve now that he’s back on the prowl. Not that that wouldn’t at least be a step up from your sentient eye booger of an ex. Is that why you dumped him? Why have some cheap imitation when you can go straight to the source, right?” Chrissy’s sitting up to glare down at him before the words have even hit his own ears, really. She crosses her arms over her chest, narrows her eyes and scrunches her nose and twists her little mouth up at him. “Steve and I are just friends,” she tells him in an insistent, impatient tone, hitting practically every word with emphasis. “Boys and girls can be just friends. You sound like Jason.” Eddie’s jaw drops. And then he jerks his whole body back to the floor of the van, flailing his limbs, grabbing for something invisible held tight to his neck. “Jesus Christ, Chrissy, should I go ahead and saw through my jugular or do you want to be the one to do it?” he asks, holding his pretend weapon out to her. Her own mouth falls open at that, but no words come out, so he brings his fists back towards his body, cutting harsh imaginary lines across his neck. He wrestles with the air and mimes spurting blood and pretends to die for another half minute before he’s done. “I think that’s the worst thing anyone's ever said to me,” he says as he flops back to catch his breath. “Wow. Point taken. Put me in my place, Cunningham, that was brutal.”

all the best people see you (all the best people know), chapter 9, a season 4 buckingham au

[hippolotamus]

Tagged by the lovely and talented @wikiangela @eddiediaztho @jesuisici33 @disasterbuckdiaz @spotsandsocks @alyxmastershipper @wildlife4life @honestlydarkprincess 💖 Make sure you check their snippets!

I’m hopping around a lot right now, but this immediately follows this snippet in you’re where I wanna go.

Buck clears his throat, and stands straighter. Taller. He ignores the way she looks on with a sort of bored amusement. “Lucy, I am an honorable man, looking for someone to share my life with. And I would like you to be that someone. Will you marry me?”

Butterflies flutter in his belly, soaring with hope. He really and truly believes that this could be—

“No.” Lucy tells him flatly, pushing herself off the cart and wiping her hands on her skirts. She immediately busies herself with checking through the bunches of roses, peonies, gerbera daisies and tulips again.

“No?”

“That is what I said,” she responds, not bothering to look up. “But do try again next week.”

The butterflies shrivel and die, becoming poisoned and heavy, dropping like bits of lead. He doesn’t understand. Lucy’s unmarried, doesn’t have any other suitors that he knows of. Every other woman in town seems to be practically throwing themselves at any chance to be engaged. Well, except for Abby. And Ali. And Taylor.

“What am I doing wrong?” Buck asks, ignoring how needy he sounds, on the verge of pleading. “How can I fix it?”

At first he thinks she’s ignoring him, or hasn’t heard what he said. Each second that ticks by becomes more unbearable than the last. He should walk away, leave her alone, and give up this foolish pursuit. But he’s rooted in place, unable to move.

“You don’t know a thing about me,” she eventually says, her back still turned to him.

“I know enough,” he protests.

“Enough,” she scoffs, finally turning to face him. Her eyes flare with an intensity that makes him want to take a step back. He doesn’t, hoping to appear confident when all he wants to do is shrink away. “And how is that? Do you presume that anyone should be automatically taken by your charms and wealth?”

“So you find me charming then?” The remark earns him an even deeper scowl. He never has learned when to shut his mouth.

“Listen, Buckley. I’m just a woman, trying to provide a service and make a little life for myself. I was perfectly fine before you decided to make it your life’s mission to be my husband.”

And it hits him then, the renewed realization of too much, too much, too much. He’s always offering more of himself than anyone wants.

“Of course. I- I understand. Thank you, truly, Miss Donato. I didn’t intend to- what I mean to say is I wish you well. Be assured I won’t be bothering you again.”

Buck turns on his heel to leave when he feels a hand grab his arm.

“Wait.”

Cautiously, he dares to turn back, hope coloring his voice. “Wait?”

No pressure tagging @shortsighted-owl @stereopticons @elvensorceress @monsterrae1 @mysteriouslyyounggalaxy @giddyupbuck @911onabc @buddierights @heartshapedvows @loserdiaz @honestlydarkprincess @spaceprincessem @thewolvesof1998 @chaosandwolves @statueinthestone @eowon @the-likesofus @apothecarose @rmd-writes LOML @lizzie-bennetdarcy @barbiediaz @cowboy-buddie @your-catfish-friend @forthewolves and anybody else who wants to share 💖

[agirlwholovesrockstars]

unchained melody

☆ EDDIE MUNSON'S MASTERLIST ☆

❣ AGATHA'S MAIN PAGE ❣

Summary : you've waited for decades to find your purpose, a trip to Earth isn't so bad.... is it?

Word Count : I'm not making this long as I can 😩

Warnings : 18+ Eddie Munson x FEM!reader, language, Eddie is 20 but reader would be probably much more older since she's a fairy, VECNA & UPSIDE DOWN DIDN'T EXIST IN THIS but still set in the 80's of course, Jason Carver being a bully (he'll appear very briefly, I promise) calling reader a bitch, use of y/n, cheating (not on reader), mentions of past life of Eddie (briefly too), mentions of Eddie doing drUg deals

What to Expect : fairy!reader‼️ fluff, fantasy, comedy, magical and a bit of angst

Note To Reader : I wanna make this idea come to life so badly and I hope you'll love it! 🥺🫶🏻

Author Note : I just wanna imagine how Eddie would react if he found himself a freaking fairy and he would absolutely go nuts for it and take care of that whimsical being like his life depends on it fr

"W-What the fuck?!"

Eddie falls back down on the ground while clutching of his safekeeping lunchbox that he sells with Chrissy earlier

His hands are shaking and his whole body trembling to what he just witnessed at the moment

He is petrified that something blasted out of nowhere coming from the sky

He tries to get up, his heart rapidly fast as he walks towards at the possible danger

But, he wants to suspect what it is

The smog and the gusting wind whooshes away like nothing happened

He looked around in the woods to see if someone's out there, there's no one

He hesitates to check at the mysterious whatever that was, maybe, he'll might die of being curious

Before he turn his heel backward, a sudden soft glow shining on the area

He squints his eyes as he tries to look harder on the ground

When his eyes finally saw that he's dying to see, it widen and he gasped

The safekeeping lunchbox slipped off from his hands making a "clank" sound

He couldn't quite understand if this is just all a dream or maybe he took too much of the shit that he's having

He rubbed his eyes as if you'll disappear after he does it but you didn't it

He crouches down, reaching out for your hands to touch you

He wants reassurance that you're real

That this isn't just some hallucination

When his fingertips touch the smooth, soft delicate skin of yours is so foreign

He never felt something so different from any other human being before

He let out another gasp, yeah, you're fucking real, alright

"Okay, what the hell is happening" he talks to himself

"Maybe, I should stop selling this, the universe is now testing me to quit it" he raises his hands up in surrender

He gets up and paces back and forth as he glances at you

He taken noticed that there's so many sparkles around you and my god- your hair is like he'd never seen anyone with that marvelous hair it looks so weirdly healthy

Eddie already made up to this mind that you're a fairy, considering how you seem so unhuman-like, okay, you're beautiful that's granted but to him- you're so....unreal

Your clothes are like something came out of the pictures from his favorite fantasy books

He tilts his head because it looks so legitimately that it isn't just some Halloween party costume

You're breathing but still unconscious

Eddie didn't even remember that he'll be late for his next class

You're a stranger and hell- he didn't even know you

But, he can't leave you like this especially in the woods alone

He put the hand on the top of his head, he is so stressed out

He isn't even sure if this is some kind of joke or not

He holds you carefully by the shoulders shaking you slightly as he tries to wake you up

The moment you moved, he raises his brows as he tries to give you space and moves back away a little bit

Your eyes flutters open, your vision is still blurry as you try to comprehend to where you are

You helped yourself up as you look around you, the time when your eyes meet his

Your heart pounds, your eyes light up and you smiled at him

He furrows his brows and he looks at you in confusion

You start to walk towards to him still having the same expression as if you knew him

You really did though, a tad bit

"You look so much better in person!" You spoke in delight and excitement?

"Wh-What?" He extends his hands in stop gesture as you halt your tracks

"Oh, right, I'm Y/N! It's such a pleasure to finally meet you!" You take his hand as you shake it politely

He rips his hands off you and he kept walking backwards as you moved forward to him

"I-I didn't even know you!" He scarily said it out loud

You're taken aback from his outburst as you tilt your head at him

The look you gave him, he suddenly knew that you probably don't remember anything of what happened to you that you're clearly fucking fell out from the sky

"Uh- Y/N- y-you fell from the sky" he points it out in the air

You follow his gesture as your eyebrows both raised together and now you're finally understand why he is so uncomfortable at your presence

You swallowed, you immediately felt the emotion and the feeling that he's having

You can't blame him, he is scared and also he's right, he didn't knew anything about you

"I'm sorry, Eddie- please forgive me, It wasn't my intention to frighten you"

He collects himself for a while as he scans your face, you're telling the truth

He sighs "Look, I-" he paused, trying to pick up the right words to say "I was just out here making a deal- I was supposed to go back to class after it but as I headed back to the building, you- just blasted from the sky on my way there and I don't know why this is happening to me, I don't know why am I talking to you right now, you know me, I don't know you and I have no idea who even are you?!?" He exclaims while rambling

You shake your head "I knew coming here is such a bad idea" you murmured

You walked back away from him

"I should've listen to the rules"

He knits his brows and he follows you

"What? What are you saying?" He blocks your way

Your joyful aura has faded away so quickly, he can't help but feel so sorry for it?

You just stare at him, you shrug- "It doesn't matter anymore"

"Hey, this whole day is so freaking odd to me it's not even over yet, so- don't you dare try to walk out on me, I just want answers"

His tone changed and his face is serious

"you promise- you won't freak out this time?"

He nods

"I'm a fairy, Eddie"

"Are you being for real?" He still refuses to believe until....

You showed him your perfectly detailed wings

He flinches at the sudden appearance of it but recovers quickly soon after

"Y-You're a fairy?!" His eyes goes all over your wings, a small smile tugs on the sides of his lips

You catched it as you finally bought back your mood

"Yeah" you grin at him enjoying the sight of him being genuinely amazed at you

You wouldn't do this for other random people but for Eddie? You trust him and get comfortable for some reason

He finally looks at you with soft eyes "Why are you here?"

Before you can respond, you saw the familiar face over his shoulder, he noticed your expression changes

"Hey! Eddie- there you are! we've been looking everywhere for you" Gareth shouts out loud

He turns his whole body to look at his friend, he grew nervous if he saw you but when he looked back, you're gone

He studies his friend, he knows something is up but he decides to not ask him about it

"You don't want Principal Higgins to give you another suspension, hmm?" Gareth crosses his arms as he smirks

"Oh- get the hell outta here, Gareth" Eddie picks up his safekeeping lunchbox at the ground as he subtly looked everywhere in the woods finding you

Gareth walks beside him, Eddie blurs the voice of his friend talking as he finally found you, his whole face lights up

You wave at him with a lovely smile on your face

He nods his head slightest move as he smiles back at you

"Eddie? About the rehearsal later?"

His friend's voice pulled out of his trance with you

"Uh- yeah, right- after class"

He looked back and you were nowhere to be found

Eddie couldn't wait any longer to go home already, he's been jumping his knee up and down

As soon as he saw the clock strikes at 3pm, he get up fast and went outside of the classroom

He went at the back, the empty hall- he breathes deeply as he shook his head sideways

God- he wishes he isn't losing his mind

"You're not losing your mind, Eddie"

He jumped yet again that you appeared out of nowhere

"Y/N?"

You smiled "Hi, again"

"I-I have so many questions" he says as he memorizes everything about you

Your face and your sweet smile that you always gave him

You nod as you reached for his cheeks that he got caught off by your action "Maybe later, Eddie- you have a rehearsal with your friends, right?"

"Yeah, wait, how did you know-"

"Dude, come on- let's go" Jeff throws his arm around his friend's shoulder

When he finally gets home, he sets aside of his beloved guitar to his room

The moment he thinks to call you- he screams in shock

You winced at his voice

"Holy- fuc- you gotta stop doing that!" His hand flies to his chest as he tries to calm down

"I'm sorry!" Your face makes the cutest frown with that small voice

He chuckles slightly "It's alright" he dismissive his hand to you

You finally lay it all out for him, he watches you intently and he listens carefully

Thank goodness, Wayne- we'll back in the morning

"So" he thinks for a second "You're here to help me?" he makes a point gesture to you and back to him

"Yeah, don't get me wrong, I enjoy and love what I was meant to do, I aced all the tests- I did it well like literally everything but after I finished it- you supposed to have a person to guide that you know deep within yourself that you chose the right one, especially when you're a newcomer that must happen"

He leans closer looking at you across at the small living room

"You didn't have any?"

You break your eyes away from as you look down as you shake your head

"No, I don't- I was there for decades, nothing came up to me that connects with me"

He gives you a sympathetic smile

You blink at him as you continue to explain further more "Newcomer's are allowed to explore the earth to find what's their purpose with one specific person but they're aren't allowed to interact with humans"

"Did you just disobeyed your rules?" He's amused by even a magical creature like you can do stuff like that

"Yeah, I'd have to or else I'll just stare at the abyss" you half-joked

"Everyone up there, they already knew their purpose at the first place and I'm just like so caught up in the middle that I feel like I'm losing my time" you paused, you don't wanna sound too sad

His gaze on you softens as you glance at him, he really does care, you can see it in his eyes

"Every fairy has their purpose like for example, A fairy can help you with love, your talent, even with something more personal like finding your place in the world, a family, anything, even with emotions too"

"And you?"

"I-I still don't know what's my use for the people" you softly replied as you duck your head down

He nods slowly as he spoke again "Does anyone every human have their own fairy?"

"Not all of them- we only appear when a human has a pure kind heart"

"I have a good heart?" He says it aloud in disbelief

"Yes, you do, Eddie" you smile at him

You wanted to say it to him about what's the main reason behind all of this but you don't want to overwhelm him, maybe, soon

"Wow" he grins at you as he looked back at the kitchen

"You might be hungry"

"Do you mean food?"

He looks at you perplexed at your tone "Yeah- wait- do fairies eat food?"

"We don't"

"You're kidding?"

"No, I am not"

"How in the world are you even alive at this point if you don't eat?!"

You shrug "Magic, I guess?"

He snorts "Okay, fair enough"

He's embarrassed not having real food in the house and it's not his fault, he is just not used having guests at his trailer

He prepares Mac & Cheese and regretting giving it you since you said that "fairies don't eat" but that won't even stop you for trying

It's your first time so you copy his movements by bringing the spoon to your mouth

You start to chew until it hits your taste buds and you squeal of how good it is

He chuckles at you in amusement

He bids goodnight to you as headed to his bedroom- you wonder why you're both separated to each other

The moment he enters the bedroom, he almost stumbles to his footsteps

"What did I say about that?!"

"Can I sleep beside you?"

He is dumbfounded at the question as he clears his throat

"No, we can't"

"Why not?"

"Because-"

"Am I not allowed to? Is it forbidden?"

He scratches his head "Y/N" he sighs in tiredness

"I always thought-" you gasp "Is it the human rules?! Do you have like those too?"

He doesn't want to argue with you anymore and he doesn't have the energy to explain it you

This whole day is a lot to take in

"Okay, fine- you want to sleep beside me?"

"Yeah" you reply happily

He just chuckles in your enthusiasm

Phew- good thing he changed his bedsheets, he doesn't want you to see the stains beneath it

He doesn't have a extra blanket so you both share

His whole body stiffens when the moment your body flush down at the mattress as you move around a little to get comfortable

You're the only girl and fuck- you're a goddamn fairy that he bought home

"This is nice" you say

A smile grows on his lips as he looks at you, his eyes went down to your clothes

"As much as I adore your dress- can you sleep like that?"

Every move you make your dress makes rustle sounds "Oh, you mean pajamas"

"Exactly"

"I think I can make up something"

You make a gesture to your hands until a sparkling soft gleam shoots right between your hands targeting your whole posture and it flashes a new set of clothes

He uses both of his elbows to sit himself up

"Woah, if only dressing up was easy like that"

It reveals to be a fluffy white cotton pajamas

You giggled as you take a look around to his room

"I love your room, it's so you"

He chortled "Uh- thank you"

"You mean waiting by decade, did you mean that you're more than 100 years old?"

"Try thousand "

"What- no way- you look"

"Young?"

He nods

"Yeah, time flies different at my place but when you're like thousand is like 20 years old in fairy years"

"Fairy years, huh?" He chuckles

You laugh "Billions are the oldest ones there"

He smiles down at you

"Hey, Y/N"

"Yeah?"

"You don't have to worry about not finding your purpose, you'll get there as long you don't give up"

You didn't expect him to say that you smiled at him widely even more your heart flutters to his words

"Thanks, Eddie, goodnight"

"Goodnight, sweetheart"

Eddie woke up while sleeping on the side of the bed, he brings his whole body to face you

There you are- sleeping peacefully, he checks the clock- it's 5am he wakes up too early as he groans slightly

He watches you sleep until the sun hits your skin- it's like the most extraordinary thing that he ever witnessed in his eyes

There's so many shimmers all over, he hasn't seen that wound under your forearm probably from the fall yesterday, it healed on it's own

"Oh my god" he whispers but he is indeed freaking out not wanting you to wake up

You started stirring in your own sleeping position, he froze, you open your eyes slowly

"Hi" you say with a smile

"Hello, Y/N"

"Eddie? boy- you're home?" Wayne calls out from the other side of the room

"Shit" he gets up and scrambles to pick a clean shirt and pants

You immediately sit up from his bed watching him

"You're nervous" you say

"Y-Yeah- I am"

The moment he reaches for the doorknob, his hair is messy so you click your tongue and say "Wait"

He looks back and you make a gesture to your hands shooting another soft gleam

Out of all the hair care treatments that he did, yours is far more better than he ever did

"Oh" he touches his hair, he blushes

"You're welcome" you smile

"Don't go anywhere, okay?"

"I won't"

He smiles at you as he went outside of the room

"You can uh- stay here until I get back home" he says as he jumps out of his van, it's Reefer Rick's house

Since Wayne is resting at the trailer, he finds another place where you're safe

Not that Wayne can't be trusted- it's just that he will be fucking grounded at the thought he bought a girl home

"Why can't I come with you?"

"To school?"

"Yes?"

He struggles to explain "No- It's too dangerous for you to come with me"

"I could protect you"

"W-What?!"

"If there's monsters I could fight them"

He laughs at your serious tone but that's true he has a lot of enemies at school

He notices that you're not laughing

"You would do that for me?"

"Absolutely! I could teach them some lessons that they'll probably won't bother you again if they try"

"You're serious?"

"Yes, that's my duty"

He unlocks the house letting you both inside as he closes the door, he checks the cabinets at the kitchen, there's plenty of food for you there

"I just can't understand why I can't come with you"

"Y/N" he walks towards you "People aren't like me"

You furrow your brows "What do you mean?"

He sighs "People ain't always nice" he knows it all too well, there's a glint on his eye that you're struggle to read

That's another thing that you should learn

"I just don't want you to get hurt, that's all"

"Okay"

He smiles and walks back at the front door "I'll be back, I promise"

"Eddie"

"Yeah?"

You hug him unexpectedly as he freezes at first but he hugs you back with unfamiliar tingling feeling on his stomach, he looks down at you with a smile

"Jeff, he's behaving very weird yesterday" Gareth argues with Jeff

"Yeah, right" he scoffs

"It's true! He's hiding something, I just know it"

"Hey, guys"

Gareth pretends to act cool

Jeff just whistles out of nowhere

He chuckles "What's going on?"

"Spill it out, Munson"

"What?"

"Gareth says that you're hiding something"

"I am not"

"You're lying!"

Eddie glares at Gareth and Jeff squints his eyes at his friend

"Y/N? I'm back?" He throws his bag on the couch

"I missed you!" You hugged him from behind as he takes a sigh of relief

"Missed me?" He raises his eyebrows, you're very sweet- it's just that this is all new to him, he never had a girl this close before

"Yeah"

Eddie smiles fades too shortly, he heard a rattle outside, he shushes you as you follow him

He grabbed a stainless steel pole, a suspense is growing in the atmosphere as he is ready to hit someone with it

"Woah, woah! Eddie- it's us!" Gareth raises his hands in surrender

"Oh my fucking god!" Eddie sighs in exasperation, he drops the stainless steel pole making a "cling" sound

"Eddie? Are you alright?"

Jeff's eyes widen and Gareth eyes flash with mischief he smirks at the sound of your voice

Eddie became tense as he begs for his friends not to come inside, he tried to block them out of the way, but both of them snickered

It's beyond of his control as he exclaims "Goddamn it!"

They both make a run for it, the moment when they're inside- Jeff and Gareth stopped

Eddie runs his hair in a stressful manner

You got startled at their appearance- you both recognized them immediately

"Are these your friends?" You beam at them

Jeff and Gareth shared a knowing look

"Care to explain, Eddie?" Jeff says

Gareth stares at you in amusement

"Listen, it's not what you think it is"

You felt a danger coming in as you shouted "Move away!"

Jeff, Gareth and Eddie are shocked to hear your voice

They both move out of the way as they went outside watching you in the middle as you stare at the sky

"Y/N? What is it?!" Eddie follows your gaze

"Look!" Gareth points it out a comet coming fast forward to you

"What is she doing?" Jeff says as they watch the scene unfolds

It looks like they're fairies as well but much more darker

A fought them all off and a big woosh of an impact when you had enough of those creatures

"Duck!" The three of them went down when bunch of broken trees flying everywhere

He taken noticed that the more you use your powers your glowing becomes more stronger it's the same thing that he saw from the fall

When you successfully defeated all of them you breathe heavily but a kind smile sitting on your face like nothing happened

Eddie smirks both to his friends, looking at them with jaw-dropped expressions on their faces

"They're gone, it's safe now" you say placing both of your palms to his friend's shoulders

They both sat in silence as they couldn't believe what they just witnessed

"I thought you're hiding a girl from us, not a fucking fairy?!?" Gareth exclaims as you just giggled

Jeff stands up sits besides Eddie as he explains everything

You sat down with Gareth as he looks at you curiously

"That all happened yesterday?!"

"You got that right"

You played with magic while Gareth watches in awe

Eddie and Jeff glances at you both

You can change the colors from Gareth's flannel as both men overhears Gareth saying "Wow, that's so cool!"

"She's here to find her purpose?"

"Yeah, I still need to know more though- she told me that right after you trained, you supposed to have a person ready- she waited for decades nothing showed up to her-"

"That's awful"

"Yeah, I know- I guess she picked me"

"You say that she could protect you right?"

"Yeah?"

"Wouldn't be awesome to bring her around school and watch her kick the fuck out of Principal Higgins?" Jeff jokingly snickers

Gareth chimes in "Yeah! That's gotta be amazing!"

You're fixing Gareth's hair using your powers as you join in the conversation

"Who's Principal Higgins?"

"That's the fucker who got Eddie held up back when he's supposed to graduate"

Before you could respond, Jeff adds

"Even Jason too! Kick his ass- Y/N!"

"Wait- til' Dustin hears about this-"

"No- Absolutely not! You guys are the only ones who can knew of her existence here"

"Your friends have good hearts" you plainly say with a smile on your face

"They both have good intentions and it seems like they only want to protect you like I do"

"I thought you said- I'm the only one?"

"I could protect you and the people around you that are kind to you"

Jeff and Gareth grins at Eddie

Eddie smiles at you and he almost forgot that his friends are there

He rolls his eyes "To the hell with it"

"I'm just worried something will happen to you"

"Don't be"

He loves your fairy aura appearance but it seems to obvious to go inside of the school with that

"Can you like change a bit of your-"

"Oh, yeah right- I can disguise"

Your hair from ebony went to chestnut brown and your clothes became more normal-like but still it isn't just some fabric that you could get in stores

A white skirt and a gray cardigan with black boots

"You look g-great" he became flustered complimenting you

"Thank you, now- let's go"

A bunch of high-schoolers eyeing you both as you hold tightly to Eddie's forearm

"Why is everyone looking at us?"

"It's because I am an outcast" Eddie wanted to say

"They aren't just used to see me with-"

"With what?"

"A girl"

"Oh"

At lunch, Eddie is becoming more anxious, you reached for his hand as he relaxes a bit

"You're okay? Y/N?" Jeff looks at you in concern

"Yeah, it's a lot of youngsters though" you say as you look around the room

"School cliques are fucking territorial" Gareth says as he flips someone off

"Well, someone got a new girl"

You felt Eddie's body tensed at the sound of his voice

That's Jason Carver

Something about this person makes you feel nauseous just by his presence

With one look at him, you knew that he did a lot of bad stuff to Eddie and that alone just pisses you off

"You got a problem, Carver?" You say

Eddie, Gareth and Jeff looked at each other

"I'm not talking to you, bitch"

the three men both rised up to their feet as they shoot daggers at their sworn enemy

You stopped Eddie by holding his chest as you walk slowly to Jason

Eddie, Gareth and Jeff follows you from behind

"I really don't get why you're so mean to Eddie"

All of the students are watching the scenario

The look you gave him is intense that he can't even look you in the eye

For some reason, you made him feel guilty

"Is it because he is everything that you're not? Carver? That's what annoys you?"

The "oooh's" from the students made him feel more worse

"You're a big man with a little dignity, Jason- that's what you are- do better" you scoffed

"Who do you think you are?" He walks closer to you as you push him back

"I am here to tell you to back off!"

"You think you could get away with that easily?"

"Don't test me or I'll tell everyone that you're fucking another girl besides Chrissy"

The whole students that gasped in shock

"Oh shit" Gareth jumps and Jeff cups his mouth

Eddie is surprised became amused that you cussed for the first time and he let out a smug smile to Jason

Chrissy slapped Jason's face as she storms out of the cafeteria

"Hold yourself accountable from your mistakes, Jason!" A cheerleader shouts and gives a smile at you

A bunch of highschool girls went straight to you

"I'm so glad you did that he's getting away with everything just because he has that "popular" title"

You're getting crowded and nod to everyone else that keeps saying "Thank you" to you almost like everyone is celebrating from what you did

In the corner of your eye, you see your friends, Eddie, Gareth and Jeff watching you as they both ramble in excitement

Eddie is the longest one to hold your gaze and he smiles at you

You kept your word to Eddie as the three of them as they watch you reasoning with Principal Higgins

"What's she saying?" Gareth whispers

"I can't lip read" Jeff whispers back

Eddie shushes them both as they try to understand your expressions

You went outside and they both wait for your verdict

"I got it covered" you wink at Eddie as the two of his friends jump in victory behind his back

"What did you do?"

His face doesn't seem like he's convinced, a part of him is relieved but also he isn't?

"I told him that your father doesn't define who you really are" you speak softly to him

His eyes went melancholy being born having "Munson" as your last name, life gets even more tougher

"I picked as fast as I read him what's the reason behind holding you back and that is why" you added as you watch him closely

He became all too quiet but he gave a sad smile to you

You're with him for over a month now and you both grew close.... too close

It feels like you both feel attachment to each other

First blossoming memories with you is getting amazed at the popcorn popping and you sigh in delight of how good it is and Eddie just loves you for it- popcorn is now one of your favorite foods

Eddie introduced you to all of the music that he worships so much- he turned you into a metalhead fairy, he didn't expect you to like it but you did it

Eddie takes you to watch movies at the local theatre and saw "Casablanca" with him

You tried so much harder to learn what love is but it seems like you must to know how it feels first before you learn to what it is

Unbeknownst to you, Eddie watches you as you react at the scenery of the film, appreciating every cinematography and the actors in it too

He's never felt this happy before and it scares him, What if somehow your job is done, what will happen to him?

Can he live without you on his side?

He ignores every feeling that he's having for you and for godsakes- you're just doing your responsibility and here he is falling for you

He bet didn't know that you're also falling for him too- you just didn't know that how it works and it is now happening

You watched him perform at The Hideout for the first time and there you are cheering him on as you look at him gleefully

In a minute, he just took his eyes off of you as he dealing with the crew and staff

A guy approaches you and oh gosh- Eddie felt on rage and jealousy for some reason

He knows about men that cannot be trusted that he just want you for- come on- let's be real here- fucking sleep with you

Before he can interrupt your conversation he overheard him saying "Can I take you home with me?"

You're so polite and also innocent for the obvious predator that wants to lure you into his trap

"Hey, dude- she's my girlfriend" he snarky announced to the guy, the words he just said carries with so much weight before he can stopped himself for saying it

The man recognizes him in one look and walks away quickly

"Y/N, that's what I mean about people that aren't nice"

"Oh, that, I'm sorry but I told him, No- and he wouldn't listen"

He is still furious you can see it in his face "You're good though? Right?"

"Yeah, I'm okay"

"Let's go home"

He's pilling the pillows from his bed as you watch him

"Eddie"

"Yes?"

"What's a girlfriend?"

Fuck

His words are coming out jumbled and his cheeks went crimson red

"U-Uh- that's the term for dating someone" he avoids your eyes

"Dating?"

"Y-Yeah- th-that happens when y-you found love and if you're dating for a long time then-"

"Then what happens?"

"You both get married"

"So we'll get married anytime sooner?"

That's when he tries to stifle a laughter but he can't help but laugh from his stomach forming a boom cackle

You laugh with him while being confused

His laughter dies down as he spoke "That's not easy, Y/N"

"I really don't get it- I mean we're both like dating for a month and that's like very long now"

He just shakes his head and chuckles

"Don't you want me?"

His silly demeanor changes into soft and serious expression

"I do" he thinks to himself

"I really like you, Y/N"

You smile widely at him

"So we do get married!"

He just started sniggering, you really don't get it

You both go back and forth for bickering with each other until you both get sleepy

You dozed off for a few hours and you woke up and it seems too much early for you to waking up at this time

You want to feel him and try to understand him a lot more

There's something that is blocking you off to look deeper into him

You gently touched his chest as you closed your eyes as you went for his core memories

It started so pleasing until his father wasn't emotionally available became a drug dealer that he wasn't proudly to became one too, her mother was everything but died too soon, he missed her everyday, Wayne was the father figure that he never had

He experienced being bullied, he is often discriminated in the town because of his family history, he's an outcast mostly belittling him by the popular ones at school, that's why he always appeared so scary to intimidate the other people who dares to harm him or make fun of him at any possible way, it's a facade to keep bad people out of his life

There's one thing that captures you, the one thing that you could never take your eyes off

Despite his life being so much in despair and agony, he is still.... Eddie.... he never changed and that is why he created this world for people like him and that made your heart swell and a tear went down on your cheek

You suddenly get up and swiped the salty tears from your cheek, you're feeling something so different

You've never cried before and somehow it also made you feel jubilant about it- you learned something new

"Empathy" you hiccupped from your uncontrollable sobs

The challenge is to make him believe that he is lovable and so much deserving of love, you must make him feel that he does matter and not a nobody

Eddie wakes up from your sniffles and he sits up so fast that he hold you by your forearms

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" He uses his thumbs to wipe your tears, this is the first time he sees you vulnerable

"I-I just need to tell you that while I'm searching for a specific person, you just- caught my attention in a snap and I don't know why but for some reason that I was really made for you, something else that is pulling me in that I must go with you"

"That's the reason why I'm here, Eddie, my world didn't gave me a choice because something already has taken the position of it and it's you"

Eddie's heartbeats faster than anyone who runs in a marathon from your words

You just pull him and hug him tightly

"If I could change the way that you see yourself, Eddie- you're a wonderful person"

"That's- oh- sweetheart- that's the most nicest thing that I ever heard"

You both hugged at each other didn't care how long it takes it just feels you whole lot better

Everytime you spend time with him, you learned new things and you can also feel that your time with him? it will be over soon

So, that's why you take the chance to be with him always

"Hey, Eddie"

"Yeah, kid?"

"I just wanna say what you told me really helped a lot and I just wanted to say thank you" Dustin says with a cheekiest smile

"I'm always here for you"

"See you later at the campaign!"

"That's such a sight to see, Ed's" you approach him as soon as the kid was out of the scene

"Yeah"

Come on, say it, it's now or never, Munson

"Y/N? Is this your doing?"

"What do you mean?"

"I dunno- I just feel like light as a feather, I mean- I always been myself but right now being like this since then and I've never stopped myself for doing it- I feel wonderful"

Tears welled up in your eyes as you look down while walking, you just mask it with a smile

Your time has come

"No, it's not my doing, Eddie-"

You feel weak all of the sudden and felt a force pulling you

You fall down from your tracks as Eddie panicked to you catch you before you hit the ground

"Wh-What's going on?"

You can't stop the tears from falling and faking it that you're okay, you let the tears stream down your face

Eddie eyeing you with so much concern

"I finally had it, Eddie"

"What?"

"I found my purpose"

You held his cheeks as you caressing it with your thumb softly

"Empathy, Compassion and Understanding is my gift to you, I successfully made you realized it"

"Y/N- I'm not that good enou-"

"You are, stop doubting yourself, you're unapologetically you, Eddie"

"I-I don't know what to say" his eyes became glossy as he looked around to help you with-

You hand out the "Unchained Melody" tape by The Righteous Brothers, it's a gift that he gave to you

His eyes flashes the same look that you had before and now it's all clear to you, the air between you has shifted

You love him

He takes the tape as he looks at you

"I understood what love means" you smile sadly

He will never forget that night

He taught you how to dance at a local diner that plays the song- it's midnight- there's only a few people there- but to you both it's like you're the only ones left in the world

That's the time when your eyes both locked and you both knew your hearts speaks for each other the same

It's the most affectionate and romantic that you two had ever been

You really wish you had more time

"Thank you, Eddie" you sobbed as the soft gleam strikes down again

"Where- are you going?- What's happening- please- I want you to stay!"

You hugged him tightly as you could

"I need you to stay with me, Y/N" he whispers as he held you so bad that as he cries with you

You kissed him on the cheek as you let it linger for a moment

"When will I ever see you again?"

"I wish we could"

He watches you fade little by little as he couldn't hold you anymore

"No- please! Y/N!- I love you!"

You gasp at his declaration as you smile at him sweetly

"I will never forget you, Eddie, we will be together again someday, my heart belongs to you" your voice echoes as the wind runs through his skin as he breathes it in

He stare at nowhere in the middle of the woods while kneeling on the ground

He looks at the tape and that breaks for him to cry about you again

6 months later

His dream of snatching his diploma and proving the naysayers wrong, thanks to you and for himself that he fights to do great things by helping himself

It's a blissful feeling to himself while looking in the mirror with a big smile on his face

The green toga and his Uncle Wayne on his side proud smile etched in his features

His friends celebrated at the graduation

He kept looking at his diploma with his name on it as he couldn't believe that he made it

"Hey, are you doing well? Eddie?" Gareth asks while sitting beside him

The crowds roar in joyous party going on inside the gymnasium

"Yeah, I'm good- I just wish she's here to witness all of it" he said with a small smile

Gareth gives him a pat on his back but he can see it in his friend's eyes that he longs for you

The first program with the cheerleaders ends as he walks outside of the gymnasium

He wants to clear his mind as the afternoon cool air kisses his skin, he exhales as he looked up in the sky and closes for a while

Listening at the birds chirping, the leaves rustles on the ground, as the students clamoring noise became only a blur

"What do you wish for?"

He open his eyes as the familiar voice that he always missed to hear

He turns around slowly to find where it is and his eyes lands on you

Your eyes are misty to see him once again

"Y/N?!" He says unbelievably, he runs towards to you as you did too

You held at each other's hands

"I-I don't understand- how did you came back to me? I thought when you said your mission was over, you go next to the other person?"

"Well, our mighty and respectable leader saw everything, but yeah- I got scolded like a teenager when I got back there but they felt like it's for the best that they offer me that I should stay and remain with you"

"Really?"

"Yeah"

"And also-"

He slams his lips onto yours as you got cut off at your mid-sentence, your eyes went wild as you cupped for his cheeks, you kissed him back

You both breathe heavily as you pulled back with giggles

"I am not leaving you anymore- that's what I'm trying to say" you chuckled

He nods as he looks at you with those glazing chocolate button eyes "Never?"

"Never"

You finally taken the moment to notice that your job to help with him is like the extravagant thing you've ever done

"I'm so proud of you, Eddie!" You say happily

He turns around to show you his outfit as you squealed with a smile, he carries you as he twirls you around as you yelp and laugh

"Eddie- I have something to say"

"Can you continue talking about it later? I just missed you so freaking much" he pulled you in a hug as you melt with it

He tugs you inside of the gymnasium but you stopped

He knits his brows together

"I love you, Eddie"

He grins and his eyes and his warmth feels like your place to be- it's your home

"I love you too so much, Y/N"

He takes you on his side squeezes you in as you both you and his friends enjoy the once in a lifetime celebration

This is your time, your world, your moment, take it and cherish it <3

[futchgunk]

Bladders Gat3 Finish doc

:et me get the rest of my fucking feelings out about baldurs gate:

im so mad bc any character who is not human or realism/white passoid is literally regarded with the same type of dismissal that you would see in mainstream media. all the companions that are not white passing are treated like shit and have bad ends.

-Lae'zel (gith) gets abducted by the a bad guy for the last 1/3 of the game (also we could talk about her being the fighter class as default is also a bit racist, but the deep dive will be its own essay). and then she can die and not be able to be resurrected. (resurrection scrolls and revivify spells ONLY work on companions and not npcs)

Wyll (THE ONLY BLACK HUMAN MAIN CHARACTER, side note we could talk about how is name is spelled like a white mormon names their kids) is a big talking point bc he is constantly strung between the expectations put upon him by himself, his family, and then his pact matron. AND NO MATTER WHAT OPTION IS CHOSEN WILL CONTINUES TO SUFFER IN THIS EXECUTIVE PURGATORY. He starts as a "i have to kill this devil" actually its a tiefling (suddenly its now fantasy racial infighting, so of course u dont wanna kill another companion so early in the game, so Wyll is forced through Hell's Circles and the exposure makes him grown large demonic horns. (Wyll does not have control over his body or himself, nor his actions, and only suffers the consequences of the actions of the Tav (PC)). Wyll even gets to have the "I did everything for my father's (approval just to have my father misunderstand me and then the most noble course of action is to be independent because i am still bound by choices prior and also if two black people form any sort of family on screen its disgusting and blasphemous so I might as well treat my father like my brother who i never was able to relate to when i was younger" THIS IS NOT MENTIONING THAT WYLL IS LITERALLY THE SON OF THE DUKE OF BALDURS GATE. HE GIVES UP HIS STATUS OF NOBILITY TO BE HEROIC AND IS JUST FOREVER CONTINUALLY PUNISHED. THE DUKE OF BALDURS GATE IS BRAINWASHED TO RELINQUISHING HIS TITLE AND CORONATES THE WHITE DEVIL EVIL DICK BAD GUY WHO SOLD KARLACH (TIEFLING) TO HELL FOR GIGGLES.

Karlach (tiefling) is a bright eyed noble hearted character that is looking for solace after having 10 years of her life taken from her when she got sold to devil and hell and made a war machine slave because thats perfectly tragic. Her heart is taken from her and replaced with an engine (machine) that is slowly killing her when she is not in Hell. THE ENGINE DOESNT EVEN HAVE A GOOD IN GAME MECHANIC, YOU GET TO SET URSELF ON FIRE TO GET A 'HEAT' DEBUFF THAT U CAN CONSUME ON AN ATTACK, you build heat any other way, so its like only <Lv. 4, and if you minmaxed the opening scene, you get a 2h sword that does this every attack, so like its a bit moot and useless. Furthermore i think its really stupid that shes yearning for companionship and yet is not allowed because her engine makes her to hot to touch. Which rubs me the wrong way as a black transfem (u could argue tiefling coded) because I already feel like that. I feel like im too intense and hot with my passions and i intimidate people to the point that I'm actively denying myself the intimacy i crave so dearly just by existing and expressing myself. The taxation of life shouldn't really exist in video games!! The whole party gets mind enslaving brainworms that magically dont work because the plot armor is really strong yet the demon character who EVEN WHEN THEY SEEK HELP IN THEIR COMPANION QUEST ARE DENIED THE REALITY OF LIVING COMFORTABLY BECAUSE THEY SHOULD ONLY EXIST IN HELL. (cried actually). Before the last of this mess, she offers to turn into a mindflayer just to give herself the peace that she could be the hero that saves the world (become the villain because its better than who you currently exist as, or die being yourself (who has LITERALLY BEEN DEMONIZED). Karlach doesn't get to have have a happy ending because she either dies from engine overdose or goes to hell just to fucking breathe. THE KICKER IS THAT WYLL, THE PERSON WHO WAS GOING TO KILL HER AS PART OF THE WARLOCK PACT, OFFERS TO ACCOMPANY HER IN HELL AND FIGHT BY HER SIDE. WHICH MEANS THAT ALL OF THE MARGINALIZED IDENTITIES EFFECTIVELY FUCK OFF AFTER YOU SAVE THE WORLD.

White victim Shadowheart has the option of rejecting what she knows (which was a lie told her) or believing it. The worst she has to do is kill a bound seraphim, and free her parents held captive by putting their souls to rest (she turns them into light, killing them). She gets sick weapons. Clerics are busted anyway.

White devil astarion got to ascend in pale supremacy and got cool vampire powers (bite+, bite++, buff on kill, and consume buff for heal || next hit crits). The final battle WAS BUGGED FOR ME. I WAS STUCK ON THE BOSS FIGHT FOR TWO WEEKS BECAUSE THE END OF BATTLE SCREEN WOULDNT LOAD. LIKE I MADE A WHOLE NOTHER CHARACTER BECAUSE I BEAT THE BOSS 7 TIMES AND MY BUGFIXED DIDNT WORK!!

if im gonna get so heated about video games i am just gonna go play bloodborne so i have no room to complain bc im constantly sucking

[cricket-reader]

Everything Is Going to be Okay

Masterlist | A03 | Wattpad | Recommendations | Inbox

Summary: the team gets held up at a base where one of the members of the team decides to give herself up in exchange for the safety and freedom of her teammates.

Warnings: language, creepy pet names, past abuse/torture, abuse/torture, sexual harassment, sexual assault (not detailed), non-consensual touching/stripping

Word Count: 2,089

Prompt: Team Dynamics, hostage situation, take me instead, recorded message, rescue

A/N: day 6 of March Trope-A-Thon by @amonthofwhump (not proof read, sorry for any errors)

They weren’t sure where everything went wrong. One moment, they were in an abandoned base for some type of extremist group that they had never heard of before, or so they had thought, and the next, three members were being held hostage in the northwest wing of the base.

One member, who was assigned to the northeast section, had previous experience with this group. She didn’t say anything because she didn’t want the repercussions that would follow. Surely, they would have to go through a long process of questioning her to see if she was an undercover agent or not. It would be pointless. So she decided to save them all the trouble.

As soon as she heard things go awry, she separated herself from the group she was assigned. There is no doubt in her mind that they’re looking for her. Quickly, she recorded a message for her team. She had to explain to them why she was giving herself up. It was the only way to make sure that the rest of the team got out safely. She told Friday to deliver it to the team.

She ran to the southwest section as fast as she could. She didn’t want them to do anything to the guys before she could reach them. She wouldn’t allow that to happen.

A man met her outside of the room they were being kept in. He immediately smiled when he saw her familiar face. “Hello, nice of you to return.”

“Let them go, Charlie,” she grumbled, not up to conversing with any of these assholes. He wasn’t at all surprised that she was so rude. He didn’t even appear affected by her grumpy attitude.

“What are you offering in return?” Charlie smirked, knowing full well that she’d offer herself up. They were never able to break that part of her that was always so selfless. At that moment, it seemed to have paid off.

“You know damn well what I’m ‘offering’, asshole.”

He grinned, wanting to hang this over her head like a piece of meat to a dog. When she had left, she told them that they’d never see her again, that she’d die before she’d end up stuck with them again. Yet there she was. “I wanna hear you say it, sweetheart.”

“Take me instead, alright?” She snapped.

“And how can we be sure you won’t just turn around and kill us?”

“I’m not stupid. You of all people should know that. I’ll go with you guys willingly. Beyond that, I can’t promise I’ll comply.”

“Good enough for me, sweet cheeks.”

Anger flared in her every time he used one of those god damn pet names. That was definitely something she didn’t miss.

She was taken away to an exit before she could check to see if the others were released. Luckily, they didn’t remove her earpiece, so she was able to hear the group’s confusion as they were released without any harm coming to any of them. That was all she honestly cared about, so when the man held out his hand, she willingly gave over the earpiece.

The man was surprised that she complied so easily, but he definitely wasn’t complaining.

Of course, they had a sedative to inject her with when they arrived at the white van they’d be taking her in. She didn’t fight, as promised, when they injected her.

The men made sure to strip her body before they left. They didn’t want to take anything that might have a tracker on it.

When she woke up, she was lying on a standard cot in a cell. She sighed but didn’t make any movement. There was no point in getting up.

It seemed like hours before the door was opened. She didn’t even bother to look at who entered. She didn’t care.

“Glad to have you back, pretty thing.”

Her gut twisted hearing the voice she never wanted to hear again. An onslaught of memories that she had tried her hardest to erase from her mind came flooding back.

No matter what, she wouldn’t let him see that something as simple as his voice had affected her. She had to stay strong for the sake of her dignity. He would only be satisfied if he knew what effect he had on her anyway. And she absolutely refused to give him any more satisfaction than having her back already did.

“I missed you,” he sincerely said, “I missed the feeling of your body against mine.”

She didn’t respond. She just lied still on her back, looking at the ceiling.

“Oh, come on. Don’t be like that, baby.” He moved to sit next to her on the bed. “I know at least a part of you missed me too.”

She internally scoffed. In his dreams, she thought. She always knew that man was deranged. That only proves her point. Who on earth would ever miss the man that repeatedly raped them? She didn’t have Stockholm syndrome.

She didn’t even flinch when his hand found her calf. She just closed her eyes, mentally preparing herself for whatever he was going to do to her.

It was as horrible as she remembered it being. During the time she was held down to the bed as he assaulted her, she stared off, focusing on a spot on the ceiling. She didn’t cry unlike the first few times. She had no tears left to cry. Not after everything she had been through.

When he left the room she felt like a shell of herself. She was on the road to recovery. She had just begun to receive touch from her teammates, who never so once showed any bad intentions, without dissociating. All of the progress she made on her own without the help of anyone was flushed down the toilet. It had taken her so damn long to recover and she was back to square one. It wasn’t fair. Not in the slightest.

The next time the door opened, Charlie had some food for her. She didn’t sit up. She just lied there, staring at the same spot on the ceiling. Even when he threatened to take away her food, she didn’t move. She knew that Charlie’s threats were empty anyway.

He would never allow anyone but himself to keep food from her. He was the only one allowed to touch her, the only one to allow her to have clothes or blankets. He was in charge of her. Everything she got was from him.

She supposed that she should be grateful. She was being fed well and taken care of. He could have beat her and starved her until she was on the brink of death.

But he didn’t.

He loved her. In his own sick, twisted way, he loved her.

Unfortunately for him, she didn’t give a shit about his feelings. He could treat her like a princess and apologise until he turned blue and she still wouldn’t forgive him. He didn’t deserve forgiveness.

She turned her head to look at what food he had offered her today. Charlie had left, she couldn’t tell you when he had, but she was alone again. Being alone there was a relief. It was the only time she truly allowed herself to have any emotions or reactions.

Sitting up, she winced at the uncomfortable feeling in her gut. She hadn’t felt that for such a long time. She had almost forgotten what it was like.

There was a bowl of soup on the tray. Wild rice soup. There was a dinner roll and a salad for her as well. He had even gone all out and got her a dessert. Sure it was just a simple fun sized candy bar, but she never usually got anything sweet unless she did something really good. It was probably a welcome back gift, she mused.

Picking up the tray, she placed it on her lap before digging in. She was able to stomach the food despite what had just transpired mostly because she had grown accustomed to it all those years she had been trapped with him. Even though she hadn’t been with him for years, everything was still ingrained into her brain. It was as if she took a very nice extended vacation from this treacherous place. She only wished it could have been longer.

The next day was marked by Charlie bringing her breakfast. She was glad that he didn’t decide to join her as he used to do. She didn’t think she’d be able to stomach eating around him that time around.

The whole day passed by pretty uneventfully. There’s not much to do when you’re trapped in a room with nothing to occupy your time with, after all.

She didn’t want to keep track of the time she spent there because it was too depressing, but she knew that a lot of time had passed. He had come into her room plenty of times for his own entertainment. Whether it be by using her body or just simply attempting to have a conversation with her unwilling self, he managed to find time every day to visit her at least once.

She wondered how the team was doing in her moments alone. Briefly she had wondered if they might be searching for her, but she brushed off the idea. She didn’t know why they’d bother. After all, she did give herself up—even if it was for the greater good.

After a session of abuse that had been particularly rough, she was exhausted. Sleep pulled her into unconsciousness almost as soon as she was alone.

It didn’t feel long until she was woken up by the door opening. That time, however, was different. Instead of the calm way that both him and Charlie used, this was rushed; frantic.

The door slammed against the wall, probably making a dent if she had to guess. She tried not to move, but she couldn’t help but to flinch. Memories of past experience told her that whatever was in store wasn’t good.

If he ever slammed the door open, he had usually been pissed off. And that meant he’d take his anger out on her. She’d remember the bruises that he would leave on her body after days like that. It made a shiver run up her spine.

Her heart skipped a beat when she heard a metallic voice say “I found her.”

Sitting up, she had seen Tony wearing his latest suit. He retracted the mask and rushed to her side.

He was so relieved to find that she had no fatal injuries. The team had feared the worst when she had disappeared, only her suit and comms left behind. But she was alive. Alive and well, so it seemed.

“Nat, bring the go bag to my location,” Tony ordered, checking their surroundings. There were no visible torture devices in the room which was a bit of a relief.

“You’re not hurt anywhere are you?” Tony asked, looking over her body once more, that time a bit more closely. His heart stopped and his face paled seeing a white substance between her legs. There were fresh bruises on her hips that made his gut twist in the most unpleasant way. They should have found her sooner.

“I’m fine, Tony,” she murmured, placing her hand on his forearm. It was both a relief and a great stressor that he knew the truth at last. She had never told anyone because she didn’t want to be viewed as weak, or lesser than everyone else on the team. But not having to keep such a prevalent part of her life a secret lifted a weight off of her shoulders.

Natasha came into the room soon after with a duffle in hand. She unzipped it and grabbed out some clothes for her to wear before they left in the Quinjet. Tony left, not wanting to invade her privacy any more than he already had. Plus, he figured Natasha would be best equipped to handle the situation.

“He can’t hurt you anymore,” Natasha assured her after she got dressed, holding out her arms out in case she wanted some physical comfort. She didn’t expect it, but it would be better to offer than not.

She crashed into Natasha’s arms, finally letting years of unshed tears fall from her eyes.

Natasha soothingly rubbed her back as she sobbed into her chest. Tears came to her own eyes as she whispered words of affirmation to her.

“Everything is going to be okay.”

[elvenbeard]

2077, April

"You really think I can make it, survive this?"

"'Course you can. I mean, you did already die and come back once, didn't ya?"

The chance of a lifetime the Konpeki Plaza Heist should have been turned Vince's existence into a living nightmare. Going from "just living, day by day" to "sheer survival, at all costs" in the manner of moments and following a row of bad decisions made by everyone involved, this was now definitely his last chance to get his life back on the right track. A second chance, after so many other second chances he'd already botched... while the one who would've really deserved another shot was now gone from Vince's life forever.

Jackie, the one person he had never regretted to trust in, who had never let him down, helped him out of the greatest messes, wouldn't be at his side through his biggest challenge so far. Vince would often lie awake at night wondering "What if he'd just kept the damn biochip? Would he be here now, instead of me? Why am I still here when he'd deserved it so much more?"

But then again... Jackie wouldn't have deserved Johnny Silverhand, Vince's newly acquired brain parasite from days long gone, unwanted voice of unreason, and perpetual threat to his mere existence.

Vince was dying, losing himself, little by little, day by day, after it had taken him ten long years to get to a point of self-acceptance and recognizing his strengths, desires, what he truly wanted from life. It was the cruelest irony of fate imaginable.

Misty's words accompanied him through his darkest moments: as long as your heart's still beating, there is hope.

Vince never wanted to be a legend... but for Jackie's sake, he'd make sure everyone would remember their names. He'd survive this, get rid of the Relic, of the terrorist in his brain, and make it out alive. No matter the cost.

Vince through the years (7/9)

A handful of before and after screenshots this time:

Some slight colour adjustments, and a little Relic-like glitch effect like it happens to Johnny whenever he's visible!

Also these two didn't make it to the final set, but I still really love the flying sparks effect :O These are completely vanilla, done in vanilla Photomode without path tracing. There's a lot of particle effects going on at Afterlife that render very interestingly sometimes (I think only since the graphics update though, since pics in Photomode take a moment to render, creating this motion blur/ long exposure effect). Sometimes this a bit annoying when you want to go for a relatively clean shot, but these looked really kinda cool for once xD

I've also been playing around a lot with a free filter plugin (search for GMIC) for Photoshop that has some really nice glitch effects, chromatic abberation, amongst many many many others :o If you don't know it and use Photoshop (although I think there are versions for other programs available as well!), I can definitely recommend it!

Now, to what I wrote above the cut, briefly. This is a relatively short post compared to all others in the series cause it's obviously the one aligning with what canonically happens in game and there's no need to retell all that in great detail xD What I wanted to focus on though was Vince's shift of mind between pre-Heist and post-Heist.

Before the heist, when Dex asks him what he wants, a quiet life or a blaze of glory, Vince is internally leaning more to a quiet life. Assuming though that that's not what Dex would wanna hear, probably, he deflects, gives him no clear answer. But yes, after having to run away from home, struggling on the street, busting his ass for Arasaka and barely making it out of all of that alive, had it not been for Jackie, he has no intentions of just throwing all his growth and progress away by blowing himself up in some daredevil endeavour. He's reached a point where he genuinely likes himself, his body, his life, and while he's not perfect, still in recovery from his time at Arasaka, and has done messed up things to get here, he would've been content with just small-time, low-risk merc work for the years to come.

With Jackie gone though, who has been a constant guidance over the last 10 years, with everything that rains down on Vince during the post-Konpeki shitstorm, I think this would change. He's being told "you're gonna lose yourself, forget who you are", "the body you literally shaped after your own wishes will soon be Johnny's", whom he cannot stand, no one wants to work with him initially after such a legendary failure, he has "a few weeks, at most" left to live... fuck all that, so hard. He's gonna fight tooth and nail to make it out of it alive, forget the quiet life.

He's gonna make sure as hell that, if all ends up being in vain, people will remember him and that he didn't settle for the easy way out. If he has to die, he'll do so standing - maybe scared, but head held high. Cause everything else would be a disservice to how far both he and Jackie have come together, to who he is at his core: a rebellious kid who once rather would've taken on a whole Valentino gang on his own instead of calling his corpo mother for help, someone who quit his secure job because he refused to keep taking the abuse from his boss, who risked his life for his best friend despite sending himself down a spiral of despair in the aftermath. He's not scared of getting his hands dirty, of forging his own path (alone, if need be), and of taking risks if he thinks they're worth it for himself or the people he's loyal to.

[lovetrouble123]

Twenty One Pilots random lyrics

Use them for prompts or whatever lol

No Phun Intended

“(…)the tears and fears begin to multiply”

“I’m caught under water and I’m falling farther”

“I’m calling my father”

“Am I screaming to an empty sky?”

“Can I understand you?”

“Lights, camera, action, satisfaction”

“(…)just to blow stuff up”

“Lights, camera, stop! We’re killing ourselves”

“Let’s talk about me, and how everyone thinks I’m just so free”

“I want to be alive”

“Today is gone”

“Tomorrows sure to come”

“Here I come again to you”

“Can you wash me/can you drown me?”

“I wanna be stronger”

“Failing miserably, drastically and then I crash dramatically into a wall I’ve hit a hundred times before”

“I still ignore the dark red blood stains on the floor, and I’m back in front of you, Lord, is the blood mine or yours? Don’t wanna do this anymore!”

“(…)his heart is broken all and all this is his call”

“Is there a way for me to grow?”

“They say the ocean’s blue but it’s black right now”

“But come this September…”

“I try so hard”

“Pollution’s in my eyes”

“My disguise will take me, break me”

“My decision for living isn’t mine to decide”

“I won’t take much of Your time”

“It’s as good as I can be”

“This is all I can be”

“Head tilted down, knees on the ground and I will ask, ‘please save me!’”

“I deserve for You to turn away”

“I was ashamed to speak Your name”

“I can’t believe that all You see is that You have covered me gracefully”

“You’re all I’ll ever need”

“(…)in my head, repeat track, of everything you’ve ever said”

“(…)crack the doors to the hallways in my dreams”

“But it seems my hallway keeps closing in on me”

“(…)making me think about you and how you’re gone”

“I know it’s selfish of me to say, but I need to know if you’ve thought of me today”

“I am taken by sleep”

“And somebody told me they saw you cry and break down”

“I tried to live for you”

“I want to be with you when I am weak”

“I failed to live for you”

“People look at him and think that he will live his life so perfectly but what they don’t know, is he wants to die”

“You’re scared when you say you talked to them again today”

“(…)tomorrow’s gone just like yesterday”

“I won’t be afraid”

“I’ll live another day”

“What is wrong with me?”

“Your love is unfair but you will never change”

“Sometimes I live for you”

“Cuz I believe in love”

“I don’t believe loves for me”

“So won’t you come around and prove me wrong?”

“I realize that it’s gone”

“The old man sits all by himself”

“(…)would dream away his fears”

“You walk around like you are fine…so confident in life, so right”

“I would laugh away the pain”

“(…)had to say goodbye as time ran out”

“Sail across the sea, just to find a pearl on the other side”

“All I can do is give you this”

“Have you ever tasted a ray of sun?”

“Fake faith”

“(…)a means to an end and then we die”

“We pretend we have such perfect lives”

“(…) because we love you”

“I seem to close all the windows in my room”

“Just pray someone hears me now”

“I think I saw the kingdom gate”

Self Titled

“I know you’re not a liar”

“Strike me down I am calling your lightning”

“Reign down and destroy me”

“I mean no disrespect, I am simply perplexed by your ways”

“I don’t wanna fall away”

“I disguise and I will lie”

“But I don’t want your way I want mine”

“I’m dying, I’m trying but believe me I’m fine! But I’m lying, I’m so very far from fine.”

“I don’t know if I am dying or living”

“(…)abuse grace”

“Your grandpa died”

“They said he had lost his mind”

“You should never trust the Pantaloon”

“Now it’s your turn to be alone”

“(…)find a wife and build yourself a home”

“You are tired, you are hurt”

“The end can’t come soon enough but is it too soon?”

“Your bones are held together by your nightmares and your frights”

“Hello, we haven’t talked in quite some time”

“I know, I haven’t been the best of sons”

“I haven’t found a drop of You”

“I try desperately to run through the sand as I hold the water in the palm of my hand”

“I’m being dramatic”

“Of course I’ll be here again, see you tomorrow”

“(…)end of my ways as a walking denial”

“My trial was filed as a crazy suicidal head case”

“But you special in dying, you hear me screaming father”

“And I’m lying here just crying, so wash me with your water”

“(…)when did you believe you were alone?”

“Petrified of who you are and who you have become”

“You will hide from everyone, denying you need someone”

“I know you want to leave”

“But friend, please don’t take your life away from me”

“Living like a ghost, you walk by everyone you know”

“Would you let me know your plans tonight?”

“I just won’t let go until we both see the light”

“I will listen to you all day”

“There’s miles of land in front of us, and we’re dying with every step we take”

“But I’ll fall in line”

“Heaven forbid they see you cry”

“I ask myself the question why I fall in line”

“(…)hear a voice inside my head ‘follow me instead’”

“The wages of war will start”

“The emotionless marchers will chant the phrase ‘this lines the only way’”

“I don’t wanna march here anymore”

“I realize this line is dead, so I’ll follow you instead”

“He stays home from work this time”

“He never really told his wife, he never really told a lie. But this time he decides that it’s alright”

“He has fallen in love”

“You’re my pride and joy!”

“I will carry all your names and I will carry all your shame”

“Oh, Ms. Believer, my pretty sleeper/weeper”

“I will tell you I love you”

“We get colder as we grow older”

“You’ve stolen my air catcher”

“I won’t fall in love with falling”

“I think you would beat the moon in a pretty contest”

“But you’ve stolen my air catcher and I don’t think I want it back”

“Cuz I’m not sure if I want to give you tools to destroy my heart”

“Now I’m here to give you words as tools to destroy my heart”

“He wakes up early today, throws on a mask that will alter his face”

“Nobody knows his real name, now he just uses one he saw on a grave”

“He pretends he’s okay but you should see him in bed late at night, he’s petrified”

“Everyone gather around for a show! Watch as this man disappears as we know”

“He thinks that faith might be dead! Nothing kills a man faster than his own head”

“He used to see dreams at night, but now he’s just watching the backs of his eyes”

“Cuz nobody knows he’s alive”

“I wanna crack the door”

“But then I remember when you packed my car. You reached in the back and buckled up your heart for me”

“I began to understand why God died”

“The demon sat there waiting on her porch”

“The breath I saw was not my own”

“You told me to hold this jar. And when I looked inside, I saw it held your heart”

“Either way your by my side, til my dying days”

“Don’t be afraid, we’re going home”

“So the hearse ran out of gas”

“Driving once again, but now this time there were three men”

“‘We had to steal him from his fate, so he could see another day’”

“There were three men up front, all I saw were backs of heads and I asked them ‘am I alive and well, or am I dreaming dead?’”

“Then one turned around to say ‘we’re driving toward the morning sun, where all your blood is washed away and all you did will be undone’”

“The clouds above will hold you”

“Now is the climax to the story”

“And honestly, we’re probably, more suicidal than ever now”

“And He is waiting”

“Your soul knows good and evil, your soul knows both sides”

“It’s time to pick your battle, and I promise you this is mine”

Regional At Best

“Hey, wouldn’t it be great, if we could just lay down and wake up in Slowtown?”

“I wanna go away, cuz things are too fast now”

“There’s a stomach inside my brain”

“I don’t wanna be heard, I wanna be listened to”

“Does it bother anyone else that someone else has your name?”

“I scream, you scream, we all scream cuz we’re terrified”

“We stay in place cuz we don’t wanna lose our minds”

“(…)white flags are hoisted”

“The stomach in my brain throws up onto the page”

“I don’t understand why everything I adore takes a different form when I squint my eyes”

“That’s not what you’re supposed to see”

“My tree houses on fire, and for some reason I smell gas on my hands”

“This is not what I planned…this is not what I had planned!”

“We are all stranger creatures than when we all started out as kids”

“We all have romantic fantasies about what dying truly is”

“I know there’s someone at the door. They called for help, of this I’m sure”

“I’m holding onto what I know”

“And what I know, I must let go”

“We all know somebody who knows somebody who’s doing great”

“Make them stop…make them stop!”

“Because a kitchen sink to you, is not a kitchen sink to me”

“Go away, leave me alone”

“Won’t you go to someone else’s dream?”

“You say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out”

“I hear a second voice behind your tongue somehow”

“So try and love me, and I’ll try and save you”

“Won’t you stay alive? I’ll take you on ride!”

“I will make you believe you are lovely”

“God, hit me straight on”

“I’ve waited all this week, for you to walk my way”

“Your mama painted your room, a shade of pink she said”

“___,take my hand, please lead me to the promised land”

“___,your royalty, in your homeland they all call you queen”

“You’re an angel fallen down, won’t you tell us of the clouds?”

“You’re true and pure…you hold the cure”

“We’re all diseased”

“Tell our dad I’m sorry!”

“I’m scared of my own head”

“Taken for granted, trust is damaged”

“I pass the test with flying colors”

“You are the pearl”

“Then my new father drained by dirty blood”

Vessel

“I’m pleading, ‘please, oh please!’ on my knees repeatedly”

“Take this weapon forged in darkness, some see a pen, I see a harpoon”

“I’ll stay awake cuz the darks not taking prisoners tonight”

“Why am I not scared in the morning? I don’t hear those voice calling…I must’ve kicked them out”

“They told me I was gone”

“Why won’t you let me go?”

“I’m insignificant”

“I will set my soul on fire”

“Metaphorically, I’m a whore, and that’s denial number four!”

“What have I become? I’m sorry.”

“You can’t trust me”

“You should take my life. You should take my soul”

“And the windowsill looks really nice right?”

“You think twice about your life, it probably happens at night, right?”

“This ain’t a noose, this is a leash and I have news for you, you must obey me!”

“Entertain my faith”

“And i’ll be holding onto you!”

“I’ve got a migraine”

“Cuz Sundays are my suicide days”

“But I know, we’ve made it this far, kid”

“Cuz sometimes to stay alive, you gotta kill your mind”

“She asked me, ‘son when I grow old, will you buy me a house of gold? And when your father turns to stone, will you take care of me?’”

“I will make you queen of everything you see”

“We’ll make pretend that you and me, lived ever after happily”

“And now I just sit in silence”

“Sometimes quiet is violent”

“It’s on my sleeve, my skin will scream reminding me of who I killed”

“I hate this car”

“Cuz somebody stole my car radio”

“One thing consists of consistence, and it’s that we’re all battling fear”

“Oh dear, I don’t know if we know why we’re here”

“I liked it better when my car had sound!”

“Peace will win and fear will lose”

“He leaves a lot”

“I’m double sided”

“I kinda like it when I make you cry”

“My prayers schizophrenic”

“I’m standing in front of you”

“Everything together trying to be so cool”

“I can’t see past my own nose”

“That’s a train”

“And while you’re doing fine, there’s some people and I, who have a really tough time getting through this life—so excuse us while we sing to the sky!”

“We’re broken”

“Pa, I’m not the one you know”

“I have killed a man and all I know”

“You’ll have to watch me struggle from several rooms away”

“But tonight, I need you to stay”

“In the night, headlights call my name”

“I will never be what you see inside”

“You say I’m not alone, but I am petrified”

“You say that you are close, is the close the closest star?”

“I’ll fake you out, all I wanna”

“What kids are doing, they’re killing themselves”

“If you’re one of them then you’re one of me”

“Our brains are sick but that’s okay!”

“It shows what you have done.”

“And you swear to your parents, that it will never happen again”

“I know what that means”

“Don’t take it!”

“I’m trying to sleep but I can’t”

“But there’s hope out the window”

“Lets go outside and all join hands”

“I simply tell them they should shoot at this”

“And that’s where I am”

“Standing cowardly”

“I can feel my death”

“I wanna know you”

“I wanna say, hello”

“Now the night is coming to an end”

“The sun will rise and we will try again”

“Stay alive for me”

“I will fear the night again”

Blurryface

“Just another attempt to make the voices stop”

“Can you save my heavydirtysoul?”

“I didn’t understand a thing you said”

“Sayin stuff like ‘you only live once’”

“Death inspires me like a dog, inspires a rabbit”

“(…)I’m insecure and I care what people think”

“We used to play pretend, give each other different names”

“Wake up you need to make money!”

“I think about the end just way too much”

“(…)it’s fun to fantasize.”

“‘Who would you live for? Who would you die for? And would you ever kill?’”

“I’ve been thinking too much”

“Help me.”

“I’ve been around”

“She’s the tear in my heart”

“I’m alive”

“The songs on the radio are okay.”

“You fell asleep in my car”

“She’s a butcher with a smile”

“Don’t trust a perfect person”

“When the leader of the bad guys sang something soft and soaked in pain”

“He must’ve forgot to close his door”

“And his four walls declared him insane”

“Hell’s hot for good reason”

“Three lights are lit but the forth ones out”

“I forgot about the drought of lightbulbs in this house”

“(…)I’m not good with directions”

“Fear might be the death of me”

“Don’t forget about me”

“Shaking hands with the dark parts of my thoughts”

“You’re all that I’ve got”

“Hope you haven’t left without me”

“I wanted to be a better brother, better son”

“I think I lost my halo”

“I don’t know where you are…”

“You’ll have to come and find me”

“We don’t believe what’s on tv”

“We have all learned to kill our dreams”

“I need to know that when I fail, you’ll still be here”

“I used to say ‘I wanna die before I’m old’ but because of you I might think twice”

“What if my dream does not happen?”

“And we’ll make money selling your hair”

“I’m wanted and on the run”

“Remember the morning is when night is dead”

“Together we’re losers”

“Where we’re from, we’re no one(s)”

“I look outside and see a whole world better off without me in it”

“You are out of my mind”

“You aren’t seeing my side”

“I’m sorry”

“I wanna be known by you”

“The ghost of you is close to me”

“Don’t let me be gone”

Trench

“I can’t believe how much I hate…”

“Spirits in the room, friend or foe?”

“I’ll be right there”

“I’ll stop my plans”

“If you need anyone”

“(…)everyone’s asleep”

“I am a vulture who feeds on pain”

“Are we still in love and is it possible we feel the same?”

“I’m just a ghost”

“They always try to stop me”

“He’s got no friends close”

“Anybody listening?”

“I’ll go with you”

“I’ll grab my bat”

“If they’re here to smoke, I’ll go with you”

“Just keep it outside”

“I’ll be back when it’s all complete”

“I’m running for my life”

“I plan my escape from walls they confide”

“I’m so sorry I forgot you”

“Let me catch you up to speed”

“You know, I’ve always been collected, calm and chill”

“You know, I never look for conflict for the thrill”

“For you I’d go step to a dude much bigger than me”

“For you I would get beat to smithereens”

“I’ll be in the corner taking notes”

“I’d go write a slick song just to show you the world”

“They think it’s messed up to sell out for your girl”

“We glorify those even more when they…”

“An earlier grave is an optional way, no.”

“I could give up and boost up my reputation”

“They say ‘how could he go if he’s got everything? I’ll mourn for a kid but won’t cry for a king’”

“Promise me this…”

“(…)if I lose myself, you won’t mourn today and you’ll move onto someone else”

“Thinking I’ll teach them!”

“Well I’m refusing the lesson”

“(…)just pleading that it doesn’t get glorified”

“(…)life they were dedicated…now that should be celebrated”

“I don’t believe the hype”

“I don’t know which way I’m going”

“But I can hear my way around”

“East is up”

“___don’t control us”

“They wanna make you forget”

“A complete diversion”

“We’ll win but not everyone will get out”

“I’ll keep on trying…might as well”

“I cut my lip”

“I keep on going back…even though it’s me I abuse”

“I created this world to feel some control”

“Destroy it if I want”

“I wanna stop time”

“I’ll sit here til I find the problem”

“(…)down in my basement”

“I’m done with tiptoeing”

“I’ll stay in my room”

“You were one of those classic ones”

“I wish she knew you”

“You’re a legend in my own mind”

“My middle name, my goodbye”

“You were here when I wrote this”

“I’m sorry I did not visit”

“When your eyes did not know me, like I know you”

“I look forward to having a lunch with you again”

“I’m tired of tending to this fire”

“They know that it’s almost over”

“In time, I will leave the city”

“(…)for now, I will stay alive”

“Though I’m far from home…in ___ I’m not alone”

Scaled & Icy

“I can feel my saturation leaving me slowly”

“(…)broke the news on moms vacation”

“Would you say you depend on the weather?”

“My sunshine…”

“I know it’s hard to believe me, it’s a good day!”

“Lost my job, my wife and child—homie just sued me”

“I don’t bother anyone”

“Self sabotage is a sweet romance”

“Pain is just a middleman”

“When your body’s screaming out, trust your minds listening”

“When I get home you better not be there”

“Searching for that feeling”

“Just like an ‘I love you’”

“You get home you barely recognize the pictures they put in a frame”

“I’ve got a long drive, I’ll tape my eyes so I don’t feel asleep just yet”

“(…)take a hit, join the club”

“Am I on the outside?”

“I’m vibing”

“Weeks feel like days”

“Medicare in the afternoon”

“I just pray that I’m not losing you”

“We’ll never take it”

“(…)when they keep lying through their fake teeth”

“Taught myself to play guitar”

“There’s nothing wrong with this!”

“Keep your bliss”

“Keep your pills, save your breath”

“Welcome to ___!”

“Ain’t no sunny skies, til you finally realize, everybody relies on synthetic highs”

“You are formidable to me”

“I’ll follow you”

“I just can’t believe that I’m for you”

“And I know we just met…”

“I wanna see it all”

“I won’t break your heart if you can break my spell”

“Fast forward thirteen years now…”

“I’m afraid of you now more than I was at first”

“Can you take me everywhere we’ve ever been?”

“I don’t know if you’ve got your phone cuz this went straight to voicemail”

“And my wife saw your face on the nightly news. Oh, boy, what’d you do?”

“(…)then you head to Mexico”

“Running it away don’t make you wrong”

“If you don’t reply, I’ll know you must’ve crossed state lines”

“She’s been crying but I’ll her you’re fine”

“I told you all along”

“We got people on the way”

“We want you home in one piece now”

“We get bodies everyday”

“(…)ride or die, my son”

“I don’t wanna go like this”

“(…)At least let me clean my room”

“I don’t wanna leave like this!”

“Blankets over mirrors, she tends to like it”

“She’s not afraid of her reflection but what she might see behind it”

“She had plans to change her name, just not the traditional way”

“One night she got cold with no blankets on her bed”

“She ripped them off the mirror, stepped back and she said…”

“Should I keep it on display or redecorate?”

Clancy

“Welcome back to ___”

“(…)overtake your former self”

“Days feel like the perfect length I don’t need them any longer”

“Can’t break down”

“I don’t wanna be here!”

“Can you die of anxiousness?”

“What about to happen?!”

“I remember certain things…”

“(…)what I was wearing, the yellow dashes in the street”

“I prayed those lights would take me home”

“Then I heard ‘hey kid, get outta the road!’”

“(…)can’t feel my legs”

“There’s a pressure in my chest”

“Can’t change what you’ve done, start fresh next semester”

“I don’t mind if it’s lonely”

“I don’t wanna backslide to where I’ve started from”

“I should’ve loved you better”

“You should let go”

“Thanks for asking”

“You can be so cold”

“You make me sad and second guess myself”

“Running late so I didn’t have the time to scrape the frosted windshield”

“Did you pull up yet?”

“Not yet!”

“Did you forget we’re tight on time?”

“I requested council with the counselor and he canceled twice”

“I’ll be pulling into the parking lot before the heat kicks in”

“What’s your ETA?”

“Two minutes!”

“Chill out man, we’re right on time.”

“And I want love and sunny days”

“Imma bit too old to runaway”

“While all the worlds asleep, I walk around instead”

“I’ll probably jump on the next one”

“I’m keeping my eyelids up no matter what”

“So beautiful, the space between…a painful reminder and a terrible dream”

“I’ve been here before”

“(…)reoccurring, days blurring, I’ll still learning what this is”

“Just keep me company”

“(…)flesh covered in bites”

“Man, it’s been a long night”

“Where do I go from here?”

“He’s thinking ‘there’s no way I’m headed there’”

“Now he can’t hold out his hand without it shaking”

“No, not me, it’s for a friend (denial)”

“‘I don’t know a lot about you still…’”

“Seems I get in my own way…”

“I just hope I communicate the craving”

“Now I see intentions don’t mean much…”

“Did I let her know?”

“(…)and hope she looks for me”

“Now I see a gesture don’t mean much…”

“Cuz it’s the fear of the unknown that cripples every step we take”

“Welcome to the new way of living, it’s just the beginning of lavish”

“You’re fighting for the front row, that’s a nice try”

“(…)’cross linoleum”

“I say whatever and whatever that I want”

“Sip a Caprisun like it’s Dom Pérignon”

“I’m talking tough happily with someone in front of me”

“NDA’s for the folks that talk to me”

“I see your problem is, your proctologist, got both hands on your shoulder while you’re bottomless”

“I can’t seem to turn the page”

“I’m navigating my head”

“Dissociate…”

“Give me some advice”

“I am wasting all this time!”

“How things change so rapidly…”

“Kind of feels like everybody leaves…feeling the reality that everybody leaves”

“Got a bad feeling that imma about to break”

“Been a good streak…”

“Have I burnt all my bridges?”

“All of that progress lost today”

“Running from a thing that I kicked in 17”

“It’s a new adaptation!”

“I have seem to run out of excuses for why I am this way…”

“Only consistency is your periphery is fear and the bridge of your nose”

“Futures coming fast you’ve got nothing in the tank!”

“In a season of purging things you used to love…everything must go”

“Make an oath, then make mistakes”

“Start a streak you’re bound to break…”

“When darkness rolls on you…push in through”

“(…)found your capacity for love and tragedy”

“Embracing how things always change”

“You learned what you can and can’t take”

“You don’t quite mind how long red lights are taking”

“Your favorite song was on the oldies station”

“You have it down that old fight for survival”

“You’re in the crowd at her first dance recital”

“I don’t wanna anyone know me or not, see me at my lowest”

“You don’t have to drop by…nothing you can do this time”

“Check on your friends”

“At the risk of feeling dumb check in!”

“(…)it’s not worth the risk of losing a friend”

“I can’t be alone”

“Just a glimpse of visual aid of you on the other shoreline”

“I’m gonna make it”

“Can’t be sure that I’ll make it”

“I’m past the point of no return”

“So few, so proud, so emotional…”

“Hello ___.”

Extras

“Please don’t make any sudden moves”

“You don’t know the half of the abuse”

“You’ll never know the psychopath sitting next to you”

“But you’ll think, ‘how did I get here sitting next to you?’”

“But after all I’ve said, please don’t forget…”

“We don’t deal with outsiders very well”

“You have trust issues”

“Why’d you come? You knew you should have stayed…”

“I tried to warn you just to stay away”

“It looks like you might be one of us”

“World has gone insane”

“Just tell me we’re alright, tell me we’re okay”

“In a world, where you could just lie to me…and I’d be okay, we’ll be okay”

[nokingsonlyfooles]

Dear Academia, I guess you can die mad about the curtains, if it bothers you that much...?

Wow, I just watched... Wow.

(I didn't really just watch it. I saved this and sat on it to see if I cooled off and decided I was being too mean. Since then, I've tripped over another essay where someone ripped into a work because they didn't understand it well enough to see the curtains at all, and I didn't like that either. I've decided to post this, so later I can post my reaction to the other one like a matching bookend!)

I made you a graphic about it!

So, I just watched my High School AP English teacher transcend time and space, possess the body of an a YouTuber, and try to drag me for quitting my English major due to being sick of dissecting the work of other writers until it dies.

Also, they put text up on the screen that I was supposed to read, over a decorative text background, and if I could pull money out of their Patreon, much like Mark Twain with the collection plate, I would've taken a nickel. For spite.

So, I guess I'm gonna talk about the blue curtains?

First of all, don't go looking for the video to drag this person. At worst, they are a little self-important and over-emotional. At best, their brain got shredded by the same process mine rejected and they are recovering. Be kind. I don't wanna hurt them, I'm trying to fire over their head. And take this with a grain of silly.

This is the meme. I couldn't find the original, uncensored version, and I don't care all that much, so here ya go.

One of YTer's friends referenced this meme, and it offended their intelligence and ability to critique art. Instead of having a more typical reaction, like thinking, "Ah, yes, you are only expressing your frustration with the school system's unreasonable expectations. As a fellow sufferer, I shall express my solidarity, and henceforth we shall share a sensible chuckle," and then chuckling sensibly, they telegraphed their offence to a slur on Art itself and wrote an essay. Of course, it is Capitalism's fault.

Now, Capitalism is most definitely tearing up the school system and inflicting lasting trauma on everyone involved and hurting Art. There is a lot of meat to be had on this bone. I would've left money in the collection plate for an engaging essay on that!

What I got was: "Art exists for you to tear it to pieces and squeeze every last instance of poetic meaning out of it, like you're hucking an orange into a juicer, and if you don't do that, you're dumb. Capitalism has made you dumb, because your dumbness is more profitable. I, on the other hand, huck Art into the juicer that is my brain, as one should, because I'm smart. The curtains are never blue. Fight the Power."

And right away, I thought: Oh, Mrs. Hillburn, I know this is how you enjoy Art. I know you really love it. You full-body crashed into a filing cabinet while explaining the Canterbury Tales to us, so I know you really do love "close reading" and want to share your joy. You're allowed to do that! God love you! But sometimes the curtains are blue.

And that wouldn't be a problem - except your job is to judge everyone on their ability, not only to interpret the curtains as something other than blue, but also to cough up a "valid" interpretation. And your judgment will affect whether they can get a job that pays them enough money to live. Now, you are free to do that. When I write things, I give them to the world! But, I'm not doing that to help you sort the children into an appropriate pay grade by demanding that they enjoy my work in the same way you do. Why would I do that? That makes no fucking sense.

I am saying this as someone writing a long-ass story that has a lot to do with objects being a certain colour and numbers adding up to a certain sum. That's there for you if you want it! Pink things are safe, orange things are hazardous, yellow means despair, and green-and-orange together is something unpleasant, because Erik doesn't like carrots and the whole world revolves around him. (Don't tell him, he'll be very upset. The world is terrible.) Do I need you to get that in order to understand my work and be "smart"? Fuck no. It's an Easter Egg. Also, it amuses me. Sometimes you need to know the number or the colour for your immersion, so I generate one in a way that has meaning for me.

There is shit in that story that I know you'll never get, because I based it off shit I wrote as a teenager that you'll never read. (It was terrible. I fixed it. I think.) This is my own personal "Glass Onion" (the song, not so much the movie). I am not obliged to imbue everything with a meaning for you to find. I'm not secretly trying to tell you Paul is dead! I'm just a human being with a sense of humour who gets bored - and sloppy and confused too.

So maybe the curtains are blue because I'm cribbing the setting off this motel room I stayed at one time and the curtains were blue. Maybe I'm saying "Hi" to my dog. Or the Blue's Clues dog. Maybe, god help us, there were actual blue curtains at the time and place I set my story and you'd see them if you found a photo. But I'm not gonna tell you if it doesn't matter. And it's not your job to make it matter if you don't get it. You can still pick up what I'm laying down. And, dammit, if you spend too much time wrapped up in the curtains, you might miss the rest of it.

There seems to be some idea that Art is hard and artists (at least #Real_Artists) must be something more than human to do it. Oh. My. God. Literally! You created this thing? Everything is there because you put it there? Everything that exists here is a thought-child you birthed from your brain like Athena? With intent? I enjoy it so much! It feels so real! How do you DO that? And, for fuck's sake, it's the same way you make a yummy sandwich or pick out a ripe melon or trim the cat's nails without getting a wound that needs stitches. You decide you want to, and you keep at it until you get good at it. You don't need to ask permission or pay a fee. The world is a classroom. Go learn. Keep trying until you figure out a way that works for you, or you decide you'd rather learn something else - and then go learn that instead.

The pedestal is very flattering, but nobody belongs up here. The very idea of a pedestal is preventing people from picking up a tool and making a thing. Can you, a mere mortal, really create a new reality from scratch, where everything is intentional and full of meaning? FUCK no! Nobody can do that! Sometimes I am lovingly imbuing every facet of my creation with meaning, and sometimes I go, "I need something there. Huh. That looks good." This is where platypuses come from! And I love them! If you don't love a platypus, WTF is wrong with you?

See??

Look, Creationism has no place in our schools. Natural selection is a thing. If I'm drawing on a real experience that involved blue or blue curtains, you may get some blue curtains. That is a real thing that happens all the time. It's not fair to torpedo someone's earning potential because, wherever you're coming from, blue makes you feel sad. You shouldn't be in a position to do that, that is not a job that needs doing.

*sigh* And, I will let you in on a dirty little secret. Sometimes I drop a stitch when I'm working, and I notice it later, and I realize I can hook that thing and make something look really cool and intentional. But it wasn't. It's there because I needed something there and it looked good. Ah, but as I've been writing, I've generated a reason for it to be there, and I now I have an opportunity to grab that sucker. I have picked up some amazing dropped stitches. I'm thinking of one in particular, a long series of dropped stitches, and when I was able to pick them all up in one swoop, I pretty much leapt up and screamed, "THE UNIVERSE IS A HOLOGRAM! I LIVE IN THE MATRIX! SOMEBODY PUT THIS HERE AND I KNOW IT WASN'T ME!" (I haven't published it yet, it's gonna be a while.) Be that as it may, you live in the Matrix with me, and the Architect might leave something like that for you too. It's not 'cos I'm doing it on purpose.

If everything must have a purpose and you're not allowed to enjoy the work unless you find every last one like it's Wally/Waldo, you may find that you've lost some of the gestalt, and the virtuosity, and the feeling. That's what started happening to me when I went to college to "learn about literature." There was value in that. Comp. Lit. was fantastic! But, they are trying to sort you into an appropriate pay grade (mine is "Institutionalized and/or Housewife") , and they must judge something. The amount of Waldos you've found is quantifiable! And so, the academic need to huck Art into a juicer also has a basis in Capitalism. Man, that shit gets everywhere.

If you love it, like Mrs. Hillburn, go for it. We see you, and we leave things for you to find, like the dev team hides gag gifts in Dracula's castle for the completionists. But if it sucks all the life out of the work and makes it a joyless slog, like it did for me - stop. Please. Or go rip up some other artist's work that's already been sacrificed for the purpose and analyzed to death. It's almost impossible to read The Great Gatsby for its own sake anymore. Even if you're out of school, you're still gonna remember finding the Waldos and tick all the boxes every time. I hope like hell going into the Public Domain can fix that.

I will finish with a tortured metaphor, because that's what I do. That's fun for me. Let's say I'm God. (Because I am. Did I say "simile"? Right. I'm God and your prayers are keeping Me up at night. Cut that out.) I've made this frog*!

I made him because I love making things - and because I love making things, I made a lot of things, and I think I'm pretty good at that. But it's no fun for Me if I don't get to share him with someone who can love him just as much as I do - for whatever reasons of their own. Adam! Look! Look at the frog I made!

Yes, Adam, you can play with him however you like! Isn't it neat how everything about him fits together? See his little toesies? If you rub his tummy, his little legs kick. Ha. Uh, you might be stressing him out a little, there, Adam. But that's okay! I made him for you to LOVE and...

Adam, what are you doing with the scissors?

Ah. Well, yes. Yes. The insides of things are very interesting. Yes, everything about him fits together. Yes, if you hook him up to a battery, his little legs kick. Ah, but he's dead. You do know that you've killed him, right? OK. Well, look, if you really want to understand how frogs work that badly, I don't mind if you cut one up...

Or two...

ADAM, THAT IS NOT WHAT FROGS ARE FOR! I want them to LIVE, I...

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, if that's how you want to play with the frogs, I guess...

ADAM. WHY ARE YOU CREATING AN INSTITUTION THAT TEACHES ALL YOUR CHILDREN THAT'S WHAT FROGS ARE FOR?

What? No! Don't... Don't PUNISH them for refusing to cut up the frogs, WTF is WRONG with you? No, no, of course they must engage with the frogs to understand them - I DO want all of you to understand them! Please don't ever think I don't! - but there's a LIMIT to... No, of course I still love you, but you don't have to...

If you do that to every frog you see, there will not be any more frogs, are you hearing me? I WILL STOP MAKING THEM OUT OF SPITE.

*sigh* No. Of course I won't actually stop making frogs, but... Can we at least come to an understanding that sometimes the curtains are blue?

*I know it's a toad. I needed a Public Domain image of a frog cupped lovingly in human hands, and the best image on the first page happened to involve a toad. Paul lives (as of this writing), and the platypus exists because I thought it looked cool. Now put down the onion and go analyze something else.

[tbhimnoteasyonmyself]

DFF & the Contemporary Issue of Trends

Last time I came onto this tag I was grasping at the last droplet of hope I had for the ending to be good.

I decided to tell you all about the great seen of Tee's confrontation with Non's dead body.

Before that I tried to guess who White might be in the story and what was happening with Phee and how and why Tan was New.

And along the way I made polls and memes and I joined this fandom in appreciating what seemed to be another great story by BOC.

We've all dedicated so much time and care and love and talent and skill to contribute to this community, to make something great around something we were growing to love...

But now we're all left neck deep in the mud, as another series with great potential bites the dust in a terrible manner.

And I'm here as the ominous oracle of the death and peril yet to come, in good Greek Tragedy fashion, to tell you this was not the 1st time we've witnessed this and it shall not be the last. And all bc contemporary media have taken 1 thing to their heart and 1 thing only: engagement.

So let's take a step back.

What fuels people? What sticks with them?

How many times a day do you remember you love your loved ones in a week? Perhaps not many. But how many times do you remember the guy the big car crash you witnessed on your way home the week it happened? A lot, probably.

Why? Bc it's new, it's shocking and it probably fuels you with either fear or frustration.

The same can be said about contemporary trends. They're new, shocking and probably fuel a negative emotion in you. So they get talked about A LOT. All at once.

This is the reason why media is becoming what it is. It's realized all st once, tried to rush through plots and plots to be relevant all the while. Makes twists and twists and twists. And has something controversial to it. Bc this will make people talk. And talk will get more people to consume.

Until of course, the next more appalling thing happens and everyone moves on.

God, this is even true in the news. I mean... How many times do you hear about good projects? Or art? But hoe many times do you hear about murder?? No wonder we're growing desensitized to it. It's all we hear about all the time!!

DFF is just another case. Another series in a sea of them that tried to be shocking and play with expectations to keep people talking.

My question is, however: and now what? Now what?

Sure, we're all talking about it cause we're shocked and pissed. But adter the emotions settle and the curiosity to find out the fuck went wrong dies out, what happens?

Don't get me wrong, I love this fandom but the series itself? It'll mostly fade away. It's not something I want to create anything for anymore. I don't have care for it any longer bc why would I??? If no one bothered to mind writing something that even made sense, why should I care to love it??

And I feel like I'm not the only one!

This fandom will die. Like many other have. And what will the creators have achieved?

I never thought about The Untamed with too much fervor, for example. And most of us have not. But if I go into its tag here or on AO3, there's still stuff being made for it. And everyone once in a while, I'll think about it and I'll coke back to it and I'll cherish and nurture it for what it is. And the fandom's there. And sure rn I haven't interacted with that fandom in a bit. And I've been on DFF's tag nearly every day. But in a year, maybe even just a few months, I'll still be thinking and coming back to Xue Yang and Wei Ying and Jiang Cheng and Wen Qing... I won't be coming back to this mess, though. And in the end, it might not matter to anyone, but it matters to artists, doesn't it?

We make things because we are humans and we wish to connect with others. We wanna live forever in the things we live behind. But a story can't be told if there's no one to tell it to. You can't live forever in a void where no one awaits you.

So, in the end, we have consumed DFF, they have their money. But it will die and be buried together with all the people who have buzzed me while I was crossing the street or didn't held a door for me or were annoying to me on the bus. While other series, nourished with more love, will be there with me and many others, accumulating all the times we thought about them through the years, alive and well.

[hearts4golbach]

Light Shower. (Sal Fisher x Fem!Reader.)

part 7

-

"and all my anger, sadness, regret disappeared, its madness."

-

I walked next door to Sals apartment and knocked on the door. to my surprise, Henry answered. he looked like he was in a rush.

"Hey, Mr fisher! are you okay?" I asked cautiously.

"yes, thank you, sweetheart. I'm about to be late for work." he gave me a sad smile. "cone in, sals in his room."

"thanks, I hope you make it in time." I grinned back at him.

I knocked on the door before walking into sals room. he was laying in his bed in boxers and a T-shirt. he was playing on his gear boy.

"Hey, babe. you okay?"

he looked over at me and sniffled. "I got sick somehow." sal chuckled.

"oh, I'm sorry, sally face." I rubbed his arm. "can I crawl in with you?"

he nodded. "if you wanna catch whatever I have."

"I can take it." sal blushed. i climbed in, wrapping my arms around his waist, meanwhile making sure I didn't get in the way of his vision. "how are you not suffering with your prosthetic on?"

he giggled. "I am suffering."

"have you taken medicine and atleast drank a little water?"

he paused. "uh..."

"sal!" I exclaimed, getting up. I went to get him a glass of water and a little medication. I brought it back to him. "cant have you dying on me, damn."

"I'm not going to die, Y/n. it's not that serious." he rolled his eyes.

"you never know!" I replied in a sing song voice. I crawled back in bed next to him and handed him the water and cough syrup.

he took off his mask and quickly took the shot of medicine, grunting as he did so. he took a sip of water. "thank you, love." he gently kissed me, staying against my lips for a few seconds before pulling away. I moved his hair out of his sweaty face before moving back to my original position around his waist. I listened to him hum as he played his game before slowly falling asleep.

-

I woke up a few hours later, around 10. sal was asleep, too. I stretched before checking my phone.

larry: wya Todd's parents just gave me more weed ;) - 9:18 pm.

larry: Y/N!!! - 9:26 pm.

larry: uve got 2 be shitting my dick - 9:31 pm.

me: oml sal is on his death bed I can't leave him - 10:18 pm.

larry: idc bring his ass with!! - 10:21 pm.

me: he's sleeping

larry: wake the beast from his slumber and let's goooo

me: ure annoying lol

larry: I give u free weed that's not possible

me: my bad gangster let me see if sal wants 2 go

larry: tell his ass I got soup

me: lol ok

what I didn't realize is that sal was awake already. I turned to look at him, bit he was already looking at me. I jumped. "you scared me."

"sorry." he apologized with his raspy voice. he sounded worse. he kissed my forehead.

"we don't have to go to Larry's, you sound worse."

he cleared his throat. "I'm fine, he seems desperate and he has soup."

"mk." I whispered, gently kissing his soft lips. he wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me in. "maybe we should just stay here."

we got up and sal put on pajama pants, tossing me a pair too. sal strapped his mask back on and we made our way down to Larry's apartment.

me: u better prepare soup cuz I'm pretty sure that's the only reason he's going

larry: already on it :D

-

larry and I got baked while sal happily ate his soup, with his mask on, of course. after he had finished, I laid my head in his lap and talked to larry about his girlfriend.

"dude, she has the biggest tits I've ever seen!"

"bigger than ashs? no way."

larry rolled his eyes. "sure."

"damn, bigger than mine!?!" I exclaimed. I glanced back at sal, who's ears were turning a shade of pink. I smirked to myself.

"yep."

sal coughed. "no way were talking about this. I don't even believe that."

"oh my god, sal."

-

I sat in my hospital bed, trying to comfort Y/n. she hadn't been allowed to take her pain meds that day.

"I'm sorry you hurt, Y/n." I frowned, watching as she curled up into a small ball.

"it's ok, sal." she whined as she pulled her knees closer to her chest. "can you read me a story?"

and I did. I read her 3 of the stories dad had brought me while I stayed in the hospital. i kept reading until I realized she had fallen asleep. I wasn't completely sure she could fully hear me through my bandages, though.

-

I took care of sal the next week, making sure he took his medicine and drank water. I stayed most nights with him so he didn't have to be alone. the funny thing was, by the time he was fully healed, I was sick, myself.

[youngerdrgrey]

all the pieces aren't even in the box // the morning show, bradley/laura, chapter two

about: Bradley and Laura's last few months in Montana and how the world reacts along the way (and maybe how they find their way back to each other) ~ read chapter one chapter two summary: in mid-July 2020, the gulf between Bradley and Laura widens as Sandy's funeral approaches. Laura's well-meaning ideas could change their relationship forever.

notes: my friends have requested/actively campaigned that this is not solely a break-up story. (they're anti-break up in general. we'll see, but either way, there will be joy as well.) it's not long after chapter one. Here's Bradley Jackson to kick us off before Laura takes the reins again. (read chapter one on AO3)

mid J U L Y (2020)

Somehow Sandy Jackson’s funeral becomes the hottest ticket in West Virginia.

It’s not like Bradley can go either way, but suddenly everybody she’s ever known wants to go and pay their respects. And fucking Hal — bless him — he’s never made an e-vite in his life. Bradley’s the one who types up the information and sends him the template. All he has to do is input the emails and paste it on Facebook.

But when Hal finally fucking posts it, he’s taken out the note about masks and social distancing. Bradley calls him up immediately, but he screens her call. Of course she leaves a voicemail.

“Hal! Don’t make me call you again. I haven’t asked for much, but you’d think since our mom died of fucking Covid that you would keep the mask mandate at her funeral. Or do you wanna die too?”

Bradley winces as soon as the words leave her mouth.

It’s just the kind of shit her mom used to say. She can’t fucking put that on Hal. She doesn’t think he’s suicidal. He’s just…. He doesn’t use his head right. He doesn’t want to be uncomfortable because once he gets uncomfortable, he starts thinking about what makes him actually comfortable, and he’s not supposed to be doing any of that anymore. He’s managed to stay sober since Mom died. She can’t fucking push him to the edge now.

So she hits the button to re-record and snaps, “Don’t screen my calls. Call me back. I don’t want Mom’s funeral to be a superspreader. Just put the masks as optional if you have to.”

She hangs up so that version of the voicemail will go through. Huffs as her phone buzzes with another dozen RSVPs. Fucking Harvard boy Alan from South East News Network clicked maybe. He’d never even met her mom.

Who would’ve thought when you cussed out those coal protestors that you’d end up anchoring at UBA? Let me know if you’re coming back for the funeral. We should get coffee.

How in the fuck did he even see this?

.

.

Bradley spends the rest of the day on a warpath. She stomps ahead of Laura on their afternoon walk. She turns on a movie even though she knows Laura would rather watch another episode of SVU. She even finishes the coffee creamer and puts it back in the fridge instead of chucking it into the trash.

It’s not like it matters. She’s the one who has to take it out anyway. She’s the only one who ever leaves the house for real. She can go to the grocery store, but she can’t go say goodbye to the woman who raised her. She can talk to the whole country every morning, but talking to the rest of her family? Giving some emotional eulogy about who they lost, or why they have to fucking wear masks even though some random coworker on Facebook who hasn’t washed his hands in three years claims to be an expert on disease.

At least Laura takes it in stride. She pulls up a separate blanket for herself on the couch without comment. She pours her wine a little heavier and gives Bradley a wide berth for their unintended movie night. She’s more patient than Bradley deserves. More patient than Bradley would be in reverse. 

Bradley would’ve started emptying other things just to make the point of how fucking frustrating it is to have empty containers in the fridge. But Bradley’s a mess, and Laura is not. Laura has an entire ranch with horse stables and an in-home studio. A bookcase in her sitting room with her Emmy awards and her Pulitzer. A real life with real people who come over when she’s lonely and play charades in her backyard.

What does Bradley have? What has she ever had in this shitty world she’s trapped in?

Hal finally calls Bradley back an hour into the movie. Bradley waves Laura off before Laura even reaches for the remote.

“You can keep watching,” Bradley says as she gets up off the couch. 

She heads out the french doors to the backyard. Figures that way if she starts yelling at her brother Laura won’t freak out too much. Bradley’s gotta stop bringing chaos into Laura’s house. Wasn’t that what Laura said back in Nevada? No chaos. That’s why she cut off Alex. That and the outing, but it’s not like Bradley can out Laura a third time.

Hal launches into a speech the moment Bradley answers. He says, “I’ll have a box of masks there, but if I put that in the invite, that’s it. All they’ll talk about is masks and how vaccines won’t work once they’re ready. It’s a funeral, Bradley, not one of your debates.”

Bradley bites on her tongue so hard it stings. It’s not a debate either way, Hal. It’s basic science. 

She grinds out, “Fine. But where’s the Zoom link?”

“Come on, Brad.”

Her eyes flash. “Don’t ‘come on.’ There has to be a Zoom, or I won’t see it at all.”

“That’s not fair. I’m the one setting all this up.”

“And I’m the one paying for it! I’ve been making all the calls—“

“And I’m just the screw up who puts the tables out, huh?”

It’s a trap, but Bradley’s not letting it go. “You said it not me.”

“Yeah, I said it. You can make all the calls you want from your little girlfriend’s cabin, but I’m the one actually sitting in this shit.” Hal’s voice shakes. Like roof tiles in a thunderstorm. Garage doors on the way down. “You want to deal with all the fucking food in the deep freezer? All these shitty ass casseroles? You know the fridge couldn’t even close the other day? We should’ve had a death as kids. That would’ve filled it up.”

“Don’t say that.”

He’s not listening. He sounds manic. Not at full tilt, but ramping up. “Everybody’s got something to say. They miss her. They loved her. They’re full of shit. You know how many people called when she had Covid? Guess. Guess how many, Brad.”

Saddest fucking guessing game of her life. 

“I don’t know, four.” That’s Roberta from the church, Mary Anne from their old park, and Lewis from the senior center. He was sweet on their mom last Bradley heard. Better to her than their no good father ever could’ve been. Mom’s words.

“One. You.”

A chill rolls down her spine. Only one.

She averts her eyes out to Laura’s yard. Technically she’d been looking out that way before, but she wasn’t looking at first. It was just something to glare towards since she couldn’t glare at Hal. 

But there’s a squirrel picking at the open table fire pit. There’s probably some marshmallow if it digs deep enough. Laura dropped half of hers the other night. The s’mores were meant to be a pick-me-up for Bradley. They hadn’t been able to do them when Emma and Sam were over. Sandy’s death put a damper on their gay double date.

Sandy Jackson, for all her faults, didn’t deserve to die alone. A whole life, and the only people who checked on her were the kids who had to. Hal couldn’t avoid it. He lived there. And Bradley….

Maybe Hal was wrong. Maybe he missed the calls or the texts.

Bradley asks, “You sure? Nobody from the church?”

Hal sniffles. “Not until after she died. Then it was flowers by the screen door. Casseroles and all them knocking whenever they saw Ma’s car in the driveway. I put it in the garage. Turned off the lights so they’d leave me alone.”

Bradley’s heart aches. He used to do that as a boy. Sit in the dark during fights and try to see how quiet he could be. Like he could make himself small enough to just disappear. He should’ve grown out of that by now. He shouldn’t still be so damn afraid of being alive.

“What about Sheryl?” That’s Hal’s girlfriend. “Why don’t you go to her place? Hide out over there.”

“Like you and Laura?” Hal huffs. “I’m fine here.”

“You’re not fine. You’re —“

“I’m fine. Sitting in the dark’s a lot better than getting high. You want something to fix? Help me keep Dad from showing up.”

Bradley freezes. She hasn’t heard from their dad since she started on TMS. He’d called her out of the blue, and she’d told him never to talk to her again. Was he still talking to Hal? She can’t stop that. She can’t let him back into her life.

She must take too long to say something because Hal huffs a second time.

He says, “Didn’t think so. Forget it. You want a Zoom, then send a link. I don’t have the fancy one. Mine’ll cut off after an hour.”

“Alright.” Her voice sounds too soft. Quiet. Weak. She repeats herself with force behind it. “Alright, I’ll send you a link. Add it into the invite. Tell everybody they can log in if they don’t want to go in person.”

She knows as she says it that he won’t do that. He’ll add the link, but he won’t make the suggestion. He wants all those people there. He wants the strangers and the church fellowship and the fans who only go to see if Bradley will show up. He wants a village. And she can’t give him that.

“I gotta go, Brad.”

“Yeah, me too. Laura’s… watching a movie.” Bradley can’t remember which one now. “Call me if something else comes up.”

“Yeah, sure.” He hesitates, but he clicks off without saying that he loves her. 

“Love you too,” she says to nobody.

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Laura isn’t watching the movie when Bradley walks back in. It’s paused on nearly the same screen Bradley left it on. An immature part of Laura had wanted to change the channel while Bradley was gone. They were meant to watch SVU tonight. Bradley knew that, but the blonde’s been lashing out in little ways.

She lets the trash overflow before taking it out. She makes her own coffee while Laura’s in the shower and stews in the studio until show time. She stops calling Laura babe.

But Bradley is allowed to be upset that her mom died. Bradley gets to react to that. Would Laura like if the reaction didn’t feel targeted at her? Of course. That does not change the fact that this is how Bradley needs to grieve. Laura can give her that. Until after the funeral at least.

So Laura finishes her first glass of wine and pours a second. Picks up the book on attachment styles that she’s only partially reading out of passive aggression. And she waits for her girlfriend to come back. And if it feels like she’s still waiting, even as Bradley returns and settles back onto the couch beside her, well, that’s between Laura and her next therapy appointment.

“How’s Hal?” Laura asks. 

Bradley circles her jaw, but she doesn’t make a sound. Not the worst call then. “He invited half of West Virginia to Mom’s funeral. Everybody will be there.” Except her. “Except me.”

Laura closes her book to reach for her wine. Says without thinking, “You’re welcome to go. You’d just—“

“Quarantine when I got back, I know,” Bradley finishes. Laura’s jaw ticks. Another little rebellion. Bradley’s eyes flash with recognition. “I cut you off.”

“You were right this time.” Not to do it, but about what Laura would have said.

If Bradley goes to the funeral, then they won’t see each other for nearly three weeks. There’s the nearly two thousand miles from Montana to the other side of country. The day for the ceremony and another to help Hal clean up before Bradley turns around to drive all two thousand miles again. Then two weeks of quarantining. That’s only if Bradley doesn’t catch Covid from anyone out there.

“Three weeks,” Bradley voices. “It’s not forever. You know Emma and Sam could come over. Have some s’mores. Talk all about me when I’m not inside cutting the strawberries.” She says it like it’s an actual possibility. Like it could be a change of pace and not the first step in their death march.

What if Bradley gets sick? What if she can’t leave West Virginia again? What if her case is serious, and Laura can’t get to her without it literally killing them both?

But if Laura doesn’t let Bradley go, isn’t that another end in and of itself? They’ve barely been dating five months. Four if they count from when they became official instead of when they kissed in Iowa. And again in New York. In Bradley’s hotel.

Five months is too soon to restrict somebody’s movements. Not quite restrict; it’s not an act of control. It’s an act of consideration. A relationship is compromise and partnership. Five months is too short a time to ask for this kind of sacrifice. If Laura even asks, she’ll sound unreasonable. Desperate and delusional. What kind of partner would Laura be to ask Bradley to miss her own mother’s funeral?

So Laura takes a heavier sip from her wine. Drinks until she can’t breathe and the only thing on her tongue is the black cherry notes in her cabernet sauvignon.

Bradley looks mildly concerned, but below that, underneath the fire that she barely tamps down, she looks hopeful. Laura can’t snuff that out.

Her mouth’s dry as she tries not to croak, “It’s not forever.”

Bradley almost squeals. She flips her phone over instantly. “I’ll message Gayle. She can coordinate with Stella and Mia. I won’t tell Hal until it’s official. Don’t want to get his hopes up if I can’t get another day off. D'you think Alison will do it, or do we need to see who else is available?”

She talks without looking at Laura. It’s for the best. Laura keeps a smile on her face, and she nods along, but all she really hears is three weeks. You’re welcome to go. And Bradley’s squeal at the thought of leaving Laura here alone.

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read chapter three