#this actually took ages to answer omg im so sorry
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answering asks 💌
while i am here let me catch up on my asks😭 making a general post as to not overwhelm the tl with my collarbones
and just like jesus….. she died again three days later
i NEED to be in a quirky situational comedy with host adam STAT omg. want to be back to back crossed arms and he rolls his eyes playfully at me at the end of our generic. nothing sexual, just his suffering and misery played off for laughs from our live audience
you are unfortunately begging the wrong tree as i am both retired and extremely NOT british. famously placing all my fics in america cos i don’t know what’s going on overseas. matty forever an immigrant in the crabieverse fr
stop i’m sorry 😭😭 i hope it’s not sending too many war flashbacks lmao. at least delilah is a delight and has done nothing wrong and is generally regarded as deserving better so ur truly the person with the moral highground in this story❤️
(as a galatea i genuinely had not considered people might relate to this story from the other angle lmao)
it haunts me too friend. literally as it was based on my real life 😭 lottiecrabie Will be farming her inner turmoils for content ☝️☝️ i wish i had finished it because i genuinely love the beginning as well, but it might be for the best since i don’t know how i would face my childhood friend after that lol
there are pfms references everywhere for those with the eyes to see
sooo true. he’s the most perfect lame loser angel<333
i see it….. he definitely has not picked up one social clue in his life
sorry i took him out back and shot him
PLSSS she rly just needs to be in pink and it’s perfect
this is how i want to be remembered❤️
yes. it’s also me in your closet speaking in tongues btw. if you want to see sims pictures i’d love to see them !!
found in some creek wailing…. matty makes rock covers of hozier songs lol
i will not go back on my fic grind But i might make another blurb if the whim takes me 🙆♀️
this is how the lottiecrabie pipeline goes actually
this i…. you’ve found me 😣
omg is the fairy village okay how are they surviving the no birth blight 😭 this aging ass fairy population damn (thank u though ily)
YASSS im so happy for you!!! its really what the main virgins anonymous advice has always been: someone you trust and lube lol
#THIS LONG ASS POST LMAO#thank u for all the asks even when i take months to answer my bffs🫶#ask#pray for my soul#linecook!au#tutor!au#detective!au#galatea take one#virgins anonymous
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WOULD YOU SAY I'M WORTHY? || TWO
PAIRING: Noah Sebastian x OFC ; slight Nick Folio x OFC
DIVIDER ART WORK BY @saradika-graphics
SUMMARY: When Eden meets Noah, her life is anything but perfect. Her heart is far more broken than Noah can even guess at this point. Will he be able to mend the wounds he hadn’t caused?
WARNINGS: angst, fluff, eventually smut, mentions of grief/loss, mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of mental health issues, mentions of illnesses
A/N: OMG. I didn't expect the first part to go that well. Thank you for every comment, like or reblog (especially the rebloggers, ily with all my heart)! im sorry it took me so long to upload part two, i had a lot to do irl. but here it is! i hope you like it!
TAGLIST: @measuredingold @cncohshit @lma1986 @missduffsblog @cookiesupplier @thescarlettvvitch @bngurngheart @dream-machine-love @arkiliastuff @vinyardmauro @lacktoesandtoddlerants @princessmarshmallowx @circle-with-me @thisbicc @xxkittenkissesxx @malerieee @smoke-in-diamond-shape (pls dont be mad if i missed someone, just remind me, im clumsy sometimes)
If you wanna be added to the story's taglist or to my taglist in general, leave a comment or message me privately!
MASTERPOST || MASTERLIST
Eden had been staring at her phone for forty minutes straight.
After waking up, her thoughts had been running constantly. She didn’t have a costume, she wasn’t in the mood to go out, she had just turned 26. All she had done since waking up an hour ago was shower and brushing her teeth. She stood in her kitchen, still wrapped in her towel and her wet, unbrushed hair just dangled over her shoulders.
She knew she was overreacting, but everything reminded her of the things she desperately wanted to suppress.
She had been staring at Nick’s messages from the previous night with a weird feeling in her stomach. She didn’t even know what brought her to the point of agreeing to go to a party. A birthday party of a man she didn’t know, while she also tried to suppress the thoughts about her own age.
She was snapped out of her thoughts, when her phone began to ring. Her sister.
Should she answer?
She continued to stare at her phone.
The call went away.
Thank god.
She blinked for a couple of seconds, while she felt her heart beating so fast that she actually thought for a second, she was going to have a heart attack.
Then her phone rang again. Her sister again. She bit her lip for a second, before she sighed. She knew, she couldn’t ignore all the calls for the whole day, so she grabbed her phone and answered with a simple “Hello.”
“Took you some time.” Her sister answered and Eden could picture the sweet smile plastered on her sister’s face. Her little sister Raven was four years younger than her. At first, her parents hadn’t really planned on having another child, but when her mom fell pregnant with Raven, they were all over the moon. Eden couldn’t remember most of the time before Raven was born, but she remembered vividly how excited they all were when she finally was here.
She always had been the complete opposite of her older sister. While Eden was rather quiet and liked to be alone, Raven enjoyed the company of each and every individual around her. Raven liked to speak; Eden hated it. Raven was great at school; Eden wasn’t.
Even though they were basically polar opposites of each other, Eden loved her dearly and they always got along. But things had changed after Eden moved away from their hometown. She found herself not liking the company of anyone anymore. She knew it hurt Raven, but at the same time she felt like Raven was the only one that understood her and her decisions.
“Sorry, I was showering.” Eden quietly answered her little sister.
For a couple of seconds, it was rather quiet. It seemed like Raven tried to find the right words.
“I know, you hate it, but I wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday.” Raven began. “Mom told me to wish you all the best from them too, but they didn't want to bother you any longer than necessary.”
Eden swallowed. She knew she had been a pain in the ass the last couple of months, but she didn’t realize she had driven her parents to the point of not even wanting to call her.
She tried to swallow her doubts, before mumbling a response. “Thank you. I’m sorry for being so quiet.”
“Oh… Don’t worry, Eden. We love you.” Raven answered her quickly and tried to sound as happy as possible, but Eden heard the worry in her voice.
“I’m going to a party today.” Eden than exclaimed, to calm her sister’s nerves and seemingly it worked.
“Are you for real?” Raven exclaimed excitedly. “Yes, I am.” – “Where? Who? I-…?”
Eden laughed quietly. She really missed her sister. She really did.
“A friend of mine invited me to the birthday party of his friend.” Eden answered her sister with a small smile on her face.
“A friend or a friend?” Raven then wanted to know. Eden knew for a fact that Raven was wiggling her eyebrows while asking that question.
“A friend.” Eden rolled her eyes. She knew this was coming.
“Sorry, I was just asking.” – “You know, it wouldn’t be this way before you even asked, Raven.”
“Yes, I know. I just wanted to make a joke… I’m sorry.” Raven apologized.
After that, it was quiet again.
“Please don’t be mad at me, Eden.” – “I’m not, Raven. Don’t worry.” – “It was really insensitive of me… Considering, you're not-…” – “It’s really okay, Raven.”
It was quiet again. Eden wanted to cry because of the awkwardness.
“I… You know… Imma... I need to go.” Raven then said and Eden’s heart hurt. This was exactly how she didn’t want this to go.
“Okay. See ya.” Eden then answered and soon the call ended.
Eden felt bad. Everything felt bad. She just wanted to curl into a ball on her couch and never move again.
She looked at the clock and realized, she needed to head out sooner than later, to find a costume, if she wanted to be on time for the party. So, she sighed and got ready. Before she went out, she ate a bowl of cereal and then grabbed her keys.
While she was walking to her car, she covered her head with her hand. It had started to rain like crazy.
Right as she reached her car, her phone buzzed. It was Nick.
Nick: Just wanted to see if you would come tonight… Nick: I mean, since you didn’t answer yesterday…
Eden starred at her phone for a second, before she answered.
Eden: was about to head out to get a costume
She thought for a second, before she texted again.
Eden: maybe you wanna join me?
Nick instantly answered.
Nick: send me the location and ill be there
Eden sat in her car, nervously biting her fingernails as she waited for Nick to arrive. The Halloween store's neon sign flickered above her, casting a somewhat spooky glow on the damp pavement. She glanced at her phone and saw a text from Nick, confirming his arrival.
Nick: two minutes…
She took a deep breath and stepped out of her car, feeling a mixture of excitement and anxiety. The rain had stopped, leaving a crisp chill in the air.
As she entered the store, the scent of latex and plastic immediately crept up into her nose. Rows of costumes, masks, and accessories sat in front of her, ready to be explored. Eden wandered through the aisles, unsure of where to start. Her eyes scanned the racks of costumes, ranging from spooky to silly. She felt totally overwhelmed.
It had been a while since she last dressed up for Halloween. To be exact, it had been about ten years. She also didn’t quite remember what happened on said Halloween, since she had been more than drunk. The only thing she vividly remembered was how she puked her brains out that night.
Before she could think about it any longer, she heard someone enter the store and was soon met with Nick’s broad smile that was almost contagious to her.
"Eden! Happy Birthday!" he exclaimed and hugged the girl for short second while she started to blush like crazy, his enthusiasm echoing through the store. “Ready to find the perfect costume?”
She nodded, trying to match his energy. "Not really, but let’s do it anyways."
For the next hour, they searched through various options. Eden couldn't decide whether to go for classic monsters or popular characters from movies and TV shows. Nick showed Eden some funny and silly options, making her laugh at his playful behavior.
"How about a giant banana?" Nick suggested, holding up a bright yellow costume.
Eden shook her head, grinning. "I don't think so. I prefer my fruits less... inflatable."
Nick laughed with his full heart, before going on with his search.
Right as Eden set her eyes on a black lacy corset dress, she felt Nick’s presence close to her and jumped when she saw him with a ghost face mask on his face.
“What’s your favorite horror movie, Eden?” Nick asked with a deep tone in his voice, while Eden held her chest. Her heart was beating fast.
“Don’t scare me, Nick!” She shouted and shoved him away from her with a small smile on her face. Nick pulled the mask off while still giggling his ass off.
"How about Ghostface from Scream?" Nick suggested, holding up the iconic white ghostly mask.
Eden's eyes lit up with intrigue. "Actually, that's a great idea, Nick. It's simple, yet mysterious. Let's go for it."
“As mysterious as you.” Nick answered while handing the mask to her. Eden smiled a little to herself, not knowing how to answer him, so she just decided to ignore it.
Eden’s eyes traveled back to the black lacy corset dress in front of her and she decided to spice her costume up a bit. If she was going to have fun for once, she was going to do it right.
“Will you try it on?” Nick asked with a spark of curiosity in his eyes. Eden felt how her cheeks heated up at his expression.
“What if I wanted to surprise you?” She answered him boldly and her mind instantly started to race at her sudden change in demeanor. She didn’t even know why she acted that way.
Nick smiled at her cheekily, before they started to add the last touches to her costume. A pair of fishnet tights, some black gloves and a fake knife. Eden decided she was going to wear her old thigh high boots with it.
As they approached the checkout counter, Eden felt a mix of excitement and amusement. She surprisingly was pretty happy about her choice, and even more, she enjoyed the process with Nick.
Exiting the store, they headed back to their cars with bags in hand. Eden couldn't help but smile at Nick's infectious energy.
"Thanks for helping me pick something out," she said shyly but genuinely grateful.
Nick grinned. "Anytime, Eden. Now, let's make sure you turn heads and give everyone a good scare tonight!"
As they parted ways with a hug to get ready for the evening, Eden felt somewhat excited for the upcoming party, grateful for Nick's help in what she thought would be a complete disaster.
#bad omens fanfiction#bad omens fanfic#noah sebastian x ofc#noah sebastian x oc#noah sebastian fanfiction#noah sebastian fanfic#noah sebastian fic#nick folio fanfiction#nick folio fanfic#nick folio x ofc#collapsedglasshouseswrites#bad omens rpf
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Hii! I was wondering what your favorite Marylily fics are! Maybe you've already answered this question before, but I'm looking for some recommendations!
Also, I just read the first two chapters of your She-Ra AU and loved it! ♡"
OMG IM SO SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG IT KEPT DELETING WHATEVER I POSTED I THOUGHT I POSTED THIS AGES AGO ANYWAYS <333 ofc! thank you so much <33
READ:
still king's cross (and pulling heartbreak out of hats) by onelastgo ( @youcouldsayimalesbian on tumblr) Word count: 50,000 - I love this fanfic a lot, it's my favourite marylily fanfiction. It's about Mary and Lily figuring out their relationship and friendship in Hogwarts while so many other happen, and each chapter stars with a letter they wrote to each other during the summer break. I actually am obessed with the style of writing, of everything, and also the letters inspired me to write something of my own...
Running to the end by friendofthefrogs (@friendofthefrogswastaken here on tumblr!) Word count: 82,180 - I really like the lily and Mary dynamic in this story, and this is also them figuring it all out with the threat of the war and Hogwarts. A lot of angst, which I really love, and a lot of fluff
Silver Springs by tastenostalgia Word count: 168,161 - I love this one, it has so many different POVs and so many interesting stuff
ON MY TBR:
forget me not, mary by goldmoons Word count: 17,101 - Ok so I've read a chapter of this, and I really enjoyed it, I like the writing style. its canon, so you know Lily and James die...
Two birds on a wire by ilbartiz Word count: 44,102 - I really liked the concept of this one, angst, it is a fix-it fic. Next to my to be read, I'm acc rlly excited for this one.
LAST BUT NOT LEAST!!! The train ride to the end of the world by RavenBird_e Word Count: 25,644 - This is an in progress fic, but it's probably one of the only AUs I've seen on marlily and been instereted. This is victorain era marylily, where Lily escapes from her soon to be marriage with James and meets Mary. I'm anxiously waiting for updates
If you wanted them on Wattpad or anything else I'm really sorry, I only read ao3 and reccomend you to get an account, it's easy
#lily evans#marauders era#marauders#fatimah gets an ask woah#james potter#mary mcdonald#f/f fanfic#marauders fanfiction#fanfic rec#ao3 fanfic#fic recs#NOT MY FANFICS#marylily#marylilyyy#marylily fic recs
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DAMN SO IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO HAD A DU TO OBEY ME PIPELINE. that fandom made me worse and i think it made my life go downhill (/hj). i was so mean like we weren't all children with unrestricted internet access idk why i thought it was that serious </3 (sorry i was reading ur blog and saw a post responding to someone and i went "wait i minute" and had a few flashbacks)
OMG HEYYYY (more ex fandom ranting under the cut!)
first, welcome!! so glad you found a better fandom to migrate to and that you aren't stuck in the past like some people i knew. you are all good, no need to apologize. it's so crazy to me that i've encountered not one, but two ex du fans out in the wild! i thought there were about fifteen of us total lol. i know that war flashback feeling. was digging through old screenshots for something the other day and i found my stash and had to take a moment. sorry if some of this makes no sense or has odd flow. i'm word vomiting and i'm pretty tired rn (in the middle of drinking a matcha, coffee, and monster all at the same time). college has been sucking the life out of me, but i just had to answer this immediately
yeah it was absolutely wild man. i don't think anyone except like a few people liked me because to this day i'm still only friends with two of them. the way i was absolutely witched hunted i tell you :sob: i 100% made more enemies than friends. even my readers were mean, and i just took it all for some reason? i've been on tumblr for about a year and half now, and i haven't had a single mean fan, but back in the day, i think i had more than i can count. yes i was on wattpad for longer, but considering the ratio, that's crazy. i have about 2.2k followers here (love all of you guys mwa mwa) and i have zero mean fans. on wattpad i think i have like 260 something, and the fact that i cant count the amount of mean fans i had is insane. if i didn't have those friends, i would be convinced it was a fever dream. if you were on wattpad at the time, you'd understand how jarring the swap from that fandom to this one would be. fanfics are allowed? still kinda crazy to me actually. can't believe being an author is welcome here! im part of a zine now!!! i didn't think that was every going to happen. have no clue how the hell this pipeline happened, but hey! at least there's two examples lol. like i said before, i honestly cannot tell if it made me better or worse, but i can for sure think of all the ways it made me worse! haha.
yeah we were all kids with unrestricted internet access everyone was like 10 to 14. i was 13 or 14 when i entered the fandom and that was old LOL. can't believe i was the responsible adult in the room at 14! my now best friend was like 11 or so at the time. maybe its the trauma bonding or something, but we're basically siblings now. we are inseparable, package deal if you will. if you remember chev, i am exactly one day older than him lol <3 my favorite running joke but it also shows my age. the swap to this fandom was so odd, because now i'm a baby compared to everyone else lol. i can't believe i'm no longer a mediator or anything. this fandom is pretty unproblematic and it's so so refreshing to just be able to exist
if you knew who i was back in the day and didn't hate me, feel free to reach out! if you didn't still feel free to reach out haha. even if you didn't know me, you probably knew my best friend whether you liked it or not haha. i understand if you don't want to, but if you ever want to chat, i totally wouldn't mind! feel free to send me a dm and i can give you my discord. would be nice to get another outside perspective. if not, again, totally fine! have a wonderful day and hope you're recovering well. you're a fighter and deserve the best! hugs and kisses :)
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(swiftie asker) "he was the sweet lemonade you wanted for a summer but cove was the water you needed" OH OKAY. OH OKAY. YOU LITERALLY COULD'VE JUST TAKEN MY STILL BEATING HEART AND THROWN IT INTO A FOOD PROCESSOR AND IT WOULD'VE HURT LESS THAN THAT. WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK DUDE
the idea of baxter filling the "other woman" archetype is so bittersweet because he doesn't even show any hints that he's upset about it. he's just so very good at reassuring others that everything's fine, that the day is meant to be about them and that he's here to make their special day perfect. but who's going to be there for him? who's going to be more than just his summer love? who's going to realize they still love him in the fall?
reminds me of some of taylor's new music from ttpd ... fortnight (the first track) is such a baxter song because like . fleeting love? the one that got away? "thought of calling ya, but you won't pick up" referring to baxter ghosting mc for five years? "i took the miracle move-on drug; the effects were temporary" referring to baxter trying to make himself as temporary as possible so mc would forget about him easily - and it not working? "i love you, it's ruining my life"? "i touched you for only a fortnight"? "all of this to say, i hope you're okay - but you're the reason"? "and for a fortnight there, we were forever"???? i'm sorry but it's literally him.
ahhhh i don't mean to constantly send in walls of text but i've been a fan of yours for a long ass time and i'm so glad you like my silly little ideas!! i look up to you a lot as a writer so it makes me really happy that you're willing to entertain my thoughts haha
"who's going to realize they still love him in the fall" OH MY GOD.... just snatch my heart up n squeeze it omg...
that song is so him. i listened to it like 3 times and it's so HIM. also "i love you, it's ruining my life" is the best fucking way to describe how I FELT AFTER PLAYING BAXTER'S DLC. the pain, the way he delicately then cruelly rejects you when you ask for more.
that'd be exactly what he was trying to avoid. it's why he didn't go further with you in the cabin, and it's why he keeps up the appearance of someone put together and strong, mysterious and a whirlwind. so much so you can't put up with it for more than the summer.
gives you the glitter and flare of a summer fling, gives you fun and excitement but deprives you of the intimacy, dodges the sensitive questions...
but you're too kind. always reaching out for him, pulling him into your small world, and he's too much of a sucker. falls for your sweet smile, your insistence that he joins your friends or family for activities. falls for you insisting that you need him, that you like him...
jfc i cannot ramble again, if anything im the one yapping your ear off LMAO. please i can ramble about baxter for DAYS. i love him but this man is the perfect angst bank and i can drag on for ages...
and please don't worry about writing long messages, even if i take awhile to respond, i love reading em so much. i was actually looking forward to what you had to say about my last response lol <3
n plus you know much more about taylor swift than i do, and the songs n stuff better. i mean i do check the lyrics n associate em n associate songs n stuff but i love how enthusiastic you are, it's very refreshing to me 😊
and omg you're so kind... ngl i cried a bit LOL i've never had someone say they look up to me n i didn't expect that, that's very sweet and i'm glad i'm good enough to be inspiring, i'm very happy to hear that🥹🫶
n i'm more than happy to listen to everyones thoughts, i think everything yall have to say is worthwhile and it's like you pluck some things straight out of my brain too 😂 i wish i could spend all day answering yall's thoughts and stuff, i get excited seeing more asks even though i cannot respond quickly
so thank you for sharing your thoughts <3 i look forward to more, n don't be afraid to dm me!!! yall are too sweet, so feel free to ask me anything 🥰
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RIGHT?! PLEASE! GIVE MY QUEEN YUZUHA SOME LOVE OMG her and senju fr. yeah,, senju was a part of the tragedy that was draken's death butdjdjjd she's what. 16? barely in high school. immature. naive. we've all done stupid, naive fck-ups when we were teens; we're human esp. at that age lmao (not defending her or attacking her. like pls djsjd she's my other badass queen! *fans self* thats my daughter! just stating facts). plus takeomi was all she had and she had a simple, pure dream of leading a cool gang like mikey's toman. the fact she was sorry for everything and felt remorse and took control of her gang when takeomi lost his cool. yooo! maturity! character progression! go queen! she wanted to make things right. she apologized to haruchiyo even if he didnt take it.
eh whoops! meant for this to be about my queen yuzuha loml aaaaa she is so strong and amazing and brave and silly and pretty and kind anddjsjsj hhhhhhh heart eyes fr. i could go on but then i'd run out of room lol i already went a bit on a senju tangent
*sighs* senju's and yuzuha's characters have so much to unpack omgg i love them sm fr aaaa
i feel like i am gonna get attacked esp. for the senju bits butfjdjd i saw one of the asks u answered talking about the lack of yuzuha talk and get super passionate (likedjsjd yesss! where are you, yuzuha fans ?? plssss djsjsj sniffles) and then i remembered some of urs??? i think urs?? asks about senju. andxjsjd BUT MOMMA DDIDNTBNRAISE A BITCH!!!! SO IM DOING THOS OFF ANON!
UR LITERALLY RIGHT ON THE MARK !!! when you think about it , you really do have to remember that all of the characters in the past are just kids , ofc they’re gonna be doing stupid things !! ofc senju made mistakes , what kind of teenager doesn’t ??? the big thing i love abt her character is that she owned up to it and took ownership of her own mistakes !! takeomi on the other hand … actually LET ME NOT EVEN GET INTO THAT 😭😭😭
& YUZUHA AHHH !!! honestly like i just love her overall character sooo much and i feel like she deserves her own spin off or something !! bc how did she learn to do the kind of kick she did w inui ? what’s her life like ? how is her life after everything that went down during the bd arc ? she’s suchhh a complex character and so interesting and she was such a great addition to the bd arc !! and then she just never appeared again . >:|
honestly though i just feel like in general we need a spin off abt all the tr girls , they just did not get enough screen time !! plus they have little interactions, but we need to see more of their little friendships !! yuzuha and senju have no canon interactions BUT i feel like they r bsfs . and hina and emma’s friendship is so cute and we only got to see so little of it !! emma literally helped hina get back w mitchy and we only got scraps of their friendship which just aggghhh . I NEED MORE .
(zont be afraid to speak ur truth abt the girls IF ANYBODY SAYS ANYTHING i will have words w them bc I AGREE W U WHOLEHEARTEDLY they literally deserve the world & SENJU DOESNT DESERVE THE HATE . where r all the senju lovers from when everybody thought she was a guy hmmmm ???? riddle me this tokyo revengers fandom … u don’t support senju but you support bonten trio , kanto mikey and izana ? oh you don’t have anything to say ? yeah that’s what i thought . 😘☝🏽)
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HIYAAAA🩷
Being single at the age of 23 could be daunting. Not in principle, because at 23 there was still a whole life ahead of you, but when all your friends were in committed relationships whilst you weren't, the doubts started to set in.SINGLE 23 YEARS OLD SINGLE LADIES HEREEE😌🤭
And that was why you found yourself in a nice, cozy restaurant on a random Friday evening with a handsome young man right opposite you. Dark hair steel blue eyes and a handsome smile: Ethan. OMG DARK HAIR AND BLUE EYES, IM IN LOVE
Conversation was flowing freely, and you could’ve really enjoyed it if it wasn't for Lewis constantly calling you. It was the third time you rejected the call and apologised to Ethan before turning your phone around. OH... WHATS HAPPENINGGGG
“You can answer that.”, he smiled. “Honestly, it could be an emergency for all you know.” BUT HE IS CUTE, PROTECT HIM
Tonight was Manchester United’s annual awards gala. You had no idea what exactly it was about, but Mason had told you that he was nominated for the New-Player-Of-The-Season award and as far as you were informed, he had to leave for that in about an hour. YAY GOOD JOB MASONNN
“I wouldn’t call if it wasn’t important.”, Lewis sighed. He sounded defeated and a little desperate and it appealed to your guilty conscience. He really wouldn't call if it wasn't important, you knew that and you felt as if you didn’t really have a chance to say no…MM I'M SCARED
“It actually is an emergency, and you have to leave?”, he offered. The soft smile still on his face even after you nodded. “That’s fine, please don’t worry. I’ve been dumped for less, you know?” OH ILL COME TO THE DATE WITH YOU😌
“So did I. C’mon, off you go. I promise I’ll message you.” YEAH...AHHAHAHA
“Well, you said it’s an emergency.”, you mumbled as you followed him into the living room where Mason was slumped in the corner of the sofa. His white shirt wrinkled, hair looking as if he’d run his hands through it for the past 20 minutes and cheeks bright red. OH WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BABY
Alyssa was his girlfriend of a few months now. From what he’d told you, they’d met on the set of the Nike shooting. She was some sort of assistant and with her witty and fun nature, had captured Mason’s interest straight away. I DONT LIKE HER
“No, she…she called him earlier and told him she won’t show up with him.” PIECE OF SHIT
Mason was a funny guy, someone who was rarely in a bad mood or sad, but you were close enough to him to know that deep down, his heart was pretty fragile. He was a sensitive person, took things to heart way too quickly and whilst he’d never admit that, his failed relationship before and the way some girls used him for getting some, had done some damage to his self-esteem. BESTIE IM ON MY PERIOD, YOU CANT MAKE ME CRY LIKE THIS, I'M ALREADY IN STABLE 😂😂
“You can tell her, Lew.”, Mason laughed hollowly. “It’s not like I have to hide anything from y/n. She said I’m not fancy enough to show up there with me and that I’m too childish for her liking and that she'd rather save herself the embarrassment of being photographed with someone who doesn’t act like a grown-up half the time.” OH MY LOVE🥺🥺🥺
“I’m right here, you know? I can hear you.”, Mason hissed, rolling his eyes at his brother’s behaviour. He was over it. Over everything and all he wanted to do was get out of these clothes and into bed. OH I'M SO SAD🥺
“You know what won’t look good?”, he asked with a sneer. “Me. Everyone’s bringing the missus. What’s it gonna look like when I don’t bring my girlfriend after I told them I would?” YOU COULD NEVER LOOK BAD😏😂
“Look, there’s no need to baby me. I’ll just tell them I’m sick and stay back. They can hand me the award next week or something, it’s not that important.” GET UP AND GO SILLY
“You shouldn’t have, y/n.”, he sighed. “Maybe you can call him and see if he’s still free for tonight? Sorry for the fuss, I’ll just go and get changed.” OH🥺 DON'T
“Yes, yes you are, Mason.”, you smiled as you got up to stand in front of him. Hands out for him to take, but he only looked up at you with that stubborn look on his face. “This is such an honour for you and you were so happy about it and you won’t let anyone ruin that for you. Go and get changed.” SHE IS GOING WITH HIM???
“Well, you won’t look stupid because you won’t show up by yourself.”, you smiled.SHE ISSSS
“We kinda have to pretend we’re a couple and I need you to tell me when it gets too much, okay? I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.” SCREAMING
“I could never be uncomfortable around you, Mase.”, you admitted, making him blush a little. “It’ll be fine. You’re my best friend, Mase. I trust you.” LITTLE BABIES🥺
“That, my love, is a very ridiculous question.”, Mason laughed. He softly cupped your cheek with his hand to force your gaze on his. “They will obviously love you. You’re this kind and funny person and I don’t know anyone who doesn’t like you. Also they’re pretty fun to be around, you’ll get along with them just fine. Okay?” THE WAY THAT HE IS TRYING TO CALM HER IN EVERY WAY 🥺🤭
His arm was wrapped around your waist and whilst he’d done that countless of times before, this time it felt a little more intimate. But maybe it was only because of the thought that for everyone else you looked like a couple tonight. IT'S HAPPENINGGGG
The time until dinner passed surprisingly quickly. As promised, Mason didn't leave you alone once while you gradually got to know his teammates and their partners and although there was no real need for it, he always touched you in some way. His arm around your waist, his hand on the small of your back or his hand clasped tightly around yours with his thumb rubbing circles into your smooth skin. OMG I LOVE THEM
You weren’t his, he knew that, but he’d spent the last 30 minutes thinking about how you’d abandoned all plans to be with him and couldn’t help but be all soft for you. You’d left your date for him and even when he’d told you to message the guy, you’d opted to spend the evening with him. CAUSE YOU'RE MORE IMPORTANT SILLY
“Hi.”, he whispered when you cuddled into his side. “You’re okay?” HE IS SOOOO DELICATE WITH HER
Mason had always been a touchy person and you’d never paid much attention to it because it was just who he was, but tonight it was…more intimate, maybe even meaningful. You weren’t even sure if you were only fooling yourself, but it felt as if the air had shifted, and it was starting to mess with your head. OMG OK I'M NOT READY
“I’m sorry I ruined your date.”, he said quietly. His big brown eyes were set on yours, apologetic and full of worry. “I realised I didn’t apologise for that before and neither for how I acted at home and practically forced you into this.” OH SHUT UP
“Yes.”, you breathed, knowing exactly what he wanted to ask and when you tilted your head a little and Mason leaned down, your lips met in a shy and soft, but perfect kiss. OMG
BESTIEEEE
THAT WAS THE SOFTEST THING EVER
THEY ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHERRRR
I FEEL SAD FIR ETHAN, HE WAS CUTE, AND HOT SINCE HE HAD DARK HAIR AND BLUE EMES 😏😂 BUT I CAN BE HIS Y/N IF HE WANTS
I LOVED HOW SHE FELT SAD FOR HIM CAUSE HE IS KINDA PERFECT FOR HER AND HE DIDN'T DESERVE TO BE TREATED THAT SHITTY
ALL THE DINNER PART WAS SO CUTE, THEM NEVER LEAVING EACH OTHER SIDE AND ENJOYING THEIR TIME TOGETHER 🥺🥺🥺
AND THE ENDDDD??? THEY KISSED SOS🚨🚨🚨 THEY ARE HAPPYYYYY🤭🤭
OMG I LOVED THIS, YOU NEVER DISAPPOINT THE EXPECTATIONS AND EVERYTIME YOU WRITE SOMETHING MORE SPEVIAL THAN THE LAST TIME🥺
IM SO HAPPY YOU'RE PROUD OF WHAT YOU WROTE AGAIN 🥺 THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH FOR THIS, THIS WAS REALLY NEDDED AFTER A SHITTY DAY🩷🩷🩷
I knew you’d fall in love with Ethan 🤭 I didn’t want to make him a bad guy cause there’s a lack of sweet boys in fics sometimes 😂😂
You can have him. I’m sure he’d be more than happy to date you 😌
Thank you very much, love! 🩷 I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙏🏼🩷
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Hello, I am here to excitedly rave about Only You Darling and shower you in well-deserved compliments. Anybody else reading this, stop if you haven't read Only You Darling as there will be SPOILERS.
First of all, your writing is brilliant, I wish I could come up with plots like you do. I have so many fics that I start writing and then I don't know how to get from A to B or what should happen next and just give up.
I have read Only You Darling (and also What The Body Wants, the whole concept of that fic >>>) twice now, and I'm sure I'll read it again in the future. My first read was a wild ride, I was so invested, I thought what if it's Yeonjun and Beomgyu but nah, then I when Soobin came into the picture I was sure it was Soobin and then it was Beomjun! Every time I thought i had it figured out, you had me doubting myself. I loved all the twists and turns and the way I was so stressed after everything went down and the reader was living in that house, the imagery that you created was amazing. I have to say that it's the best fic I've read on this site. Hands down. I don't think I've read such a well planned and fleshed out fic in maybe a decade (not to show my age haha), after I was done reading I felt as if I'd just watched a movie. I don't even get through thriller novels, I always get bored with the pacing or the writing, but you had me in the palm of your hand.
I'm sure I have more thoughts, but right now they're just a blurred mess of excitement and awe. Thank you for sharing your work and making me excited about reading fics again. I am slowly making my way through the rest of your stuff, I'm sure I will be back to word-vomit on you about other stories in the future!
HAIIIIII HIHIHI OMG IM SOOOO SORRY I TOOK LITERAL MONTHS TO ANSWER THIS 😭😭😭🙁 i saw it and wanted to make sure that i had time to answer all your points but then i KEPT FORGETTING ABOUT IT 😭😭 but please know that i really appreciate feedback like 🫶🫶🫶 getting a review on oyd always makes me so happy and you really delivered with this
full response under the cut :]
AHHHHSJDBSKDB BUT THANK U OMG 💔💔 when i first started writing on here i’d neverrrr thought i’d be writing long fics so consistently… even 10k was a huge rare accomplishment to me akzbwkdjs,,, it takes time to really figure out what works and what doesn’t with writing methods but… i wish you the best of luck with all your wips and i’m sure you’ll be able to have a breakthrough someday with any you might be struggling on !!! i believe in you !!!
YOU’VE READ OYD TWICE. Oh… my heart T_T idk but like,, i’ve never really been able to grasp the concept that people actually.. reread my stories. That’s genuinely one of the most flattering things to hear in my opinion bc 😭😭 to hear that i’ve managed to write a fic that’s worth being read again is mind blowing to me algskldgh (also thank you !!! WTBW is forever near and dear to my heart <3)
It’s always so satisfying to hear that my attempts on tricking the readers were successful hehe :3 it was one of the major things i was worried about tbh,,, it took a lot of thinking on how i would introduce soobin’s character and how he would be involved, so im happy to hear that my work paid off ! and imagery was something that i learned was very important while writing oyd; it really makes or breaks a scene, imo. Especially in those final cabin scenes,,, AGH idk im so giddy to have it pointed out tho bc i do put a little extra love and effort into my imagery :3
AWWWWSLDKGHH UGH YOU’RE JUST. im gonna sob. The best fic.. dont say that to me im crazy 😭😭 but aggggh it makes me feel so appreciated and seen to read that you think it’s well planned like :(( i remember how much effort i put into that fic omg… that story is my baby im afraid
Again, thank you so much for taking the time to write such a sweet review, and im sorry i couldn’t respond to it sooner 😭 comments like these are sooo motivating and validating, i seriously can’t explain how happy it makes me <333
#this is the slowest ask responder i know#they get down#they dont play#fic: only you darling#rambles#koqabear asks
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aurrr ur reading the secret history omg i love that so much... read it like 6 years ago and made it my whole personality for a while.... changed my life fr i hope u like it ! (also i'm done w/ no longer human and i loved it :( i'm going to look for more of his works hehe and in general just read more japanese literature) also hunger games > divergent ur so real
how did u decide which books to put on ur profile omg... i have a goodreads account too but i started it like ages ago and i'm too disorganised to actually update it and idw to start from scratch...
IM SORRY I TOOK SO LONG TO ANSWER
anyway.. the secret history is so hard to read m not even gonna lie. im writing down words i dont understand and im literally at 17 words after 30 pages, its sick. SO GLAD U LOVED NO LONGER HUMAN THAT BOOK CHANGED ME!!!!!!! idk if it was for the worse or for the better but tbh idk where id be without it.
divergent sucks and hunger games is that bitch idc. i just went to browse, and chose some categories i know i read a lot. so like when i saw smth ive read i was like omg. lets rate this. ++ i also searched up my fave books and books i hated just to spice it up a bit hihi
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continued: i assumed ghosts dont go to limbo because ghostbur wasnt there until he actually like died so i assume its more like switching places from the point that a character dies (im not sure how death and revival exactly works on the dsmp--this is my assumption). so i thought that was kind of how tommys ghost was canon ? cause hes the only one who hasnt had a ghost at all to this point but it could also be a plot hole. idk you have me thinkin
Alright this is gonna be long. Not in a bad way! This isn't discourse or anything, just analysis and that's just how it goes when talking about this stuff.
Long discussion about Ghosts on the DSMP ahead!
One thing you have to get straight about this, is that there is little consistency between all the ghosts on the DSMP. For this we are going to talk about our 4 confirmed ghosts, Boo, Ghostbur, Ghost Mexican Dream, and Glatt. (austinshow and velvet are both dead, but since they don't have ghosts (nor a time when they were alive for us to compare to) they will be left out of this "essay"(i can't believe i have to say this, only in the dream smp lmao)) The only consistent aspects I have found between all ghosts are as follows:
- A "washed out" color pallet/ grey skin and hair
- Overall more carefree (while they can have moments of distress, a neutral state for them is one of a carefree attitude)
- And a weakness that would "kill" them or send them back to limbo. For Ghostbur its water, for Glatt its the sun, for MD its possibly Quackity, and for Boo its doing a song and dance
That's all! you would think more fundamental aspects of ghosts need to be set in stone, but no. You would think that maybe ghosts need to be separate from their selves in limbo, but MD and Glatt both make reference of traveling back and forth between limbo and the overworld. Maybe the ghosts need to be stagnate characters, set in their ways and unwilling to learn or change, but Glatt goes through a whole character arc in Tales. They need to be happy? nope. They give out stuff that meant something to them when they were alive? also no. Its frustrating!
So, the the idea of Tommy not having a ghost while everyone else does is consistent with the inconsistencies of ghosts. Confusing, right? Never said the dream smp didn't have plot holes lol. So it is not out of the realm that Tommy is just special and didn't get a ghost, for some reason.
Lets look at what you said, though.
Limbo is weird. And that scene with Glatt in the gym is good for us getting to know more about limbo (and is really funny).
Im rewatching that section of the stream here for this, and the gym does seem to be Schlatts limbo. From Boo's description of what limbo is (a type of ball where sometimes the faces will cross into each other, and that is how people can see each other in limbo.) we could say that Schlatts gym is a place in limbo where this "face" of the "sphere" crosses into the overworld. Like a place where ley lines cross.
Then again, Schlatt also said that Wilbur would come in to the gym occasionally to annoy him, while Wilbur has said he did nothing of the sort, and has instead said that Wilbur couldn't leave the train station. So this might not be totally accurate.
When Schlatt alludes to Tommy here he does say "he comes down here" (present) but also its important to note that when this stream aired, Tommy had only recently been revived. (Quackitys vod says march 17th as its upload date, so the stream was likely a day or so before, and Tommy was revived on march 3rd) While limbo time works differently, we don't know what time Schlatt's gym operates in. In this encounter, real time, but who knows. Maybe when talking to different people time is different? How long does Schlatt think he's been dead for then?
Food for thought, but its also to be noted this clip does NOT prove Ghostinnits existence. I've been trying for like the past hour to find a clip where cc!wilbur said that Ghostinnit isn't canon, or at the very least he's not in limbo, but I've had no such luck. There is a very good unofficial vods channel for Wilbur so I'm sure someone more dedicated could look though those to find it exactly, but that's a bit overkill for me and for this haha.
Now for a bit easier thing to ... disprove? argue against? You were under the assumption that ghosts didn't go to limbo "because Ghostbur didn't go there until he actually died" and that's false!
The two ghosts we see instantly after revival are Boo and Ghostbur, and both actually talk about their experiences in limbo that they briefly had before getting put back into the world.
When Ghostbur comes back initially, several people asked him what death was like (i think mostly Tubbo and Quackity, this was like the day after the 16th), and while he insisted he didn't go to hell, he described death as "nothing." Sound familiar? maybe like Tommy's limbo?
But wait, why would Ghostbur's limbo and Tommy's be the same? And if the void was Ghostbur's limbo, why is he at the train station now? For the first one, we could take it as Tommy heard this description of what Ghostbur's death was like, and as such that's what he expected of limbo, so it became like that. It could be like the sphere thing, where Ghostbur just took a peak into either an empty space, or Tommy's limbo (if it pre-existed). Or we could take it as, since at this point, only Schlatt has died, there hasn't been enough time for a proper limbo to form for Ghostbur to see.
Which brings us to Boo (we'll get back to the train station). Boo didn't describe his limbo, so much as tell us that he was able to see Ghostbur crying at the train station limbo. And then went on to describe the ball thing. If that were the case, a Ghost's brief visit into limbo when they die (or are born) could be looking at a section of this "sphere." And limbo's for people only are on the "sphere" if there is someone to inhabit that limbo.
So when Ghostbur died, there was only 1 limbo on the "sphere" as such there was a lot of "blank space" and so Ghostbur saw nothing. When Boo died, there were more limbos there so he was able to peak into Ghostbur's limbo.
And when Ghostbur goes back to the train station, I believe that this is just a factor of Ghostbur and Wilbur being, at least from the same person, if they are not still the same. So they would have a smiliar limbos. Ghostbur just wasn't able to see it the first time around because it didn't exist yet (quite literally, cc!wilbur hadn't thought of it yet). It also to be noted, its not exactly the same as Wilbur's train station. Cc!Wilbur has said that it is dirtier, darker, and Wilbur had no TV's telling him what everyone said about him. This shows that this is Ghostbur's unique limbo, that while similar to Wilbur's, is his own.
I hope that makes sense! I know Boo's explanation of the way he thinks limbo works is confusing enough, so this could make it even worse haha.
One way I've seen that has the most merit for being canon is that Tommy did get a ghost, he just appeared in the prison cell with Dream (where he died, which is consistent with Ghostbur showing up where Wilbur died) and Dream killed Ghostinnit to revive Tommy. i think this is the most likely, if it were to be canon, but no other people from limbo have mentioned seeing Tommy's ghost, or Tommy since he died, save for that one Schlatt clip.
Finally, your totally good artemysty for not knowing how death and revival works. I don't totally know myself, and its not made very clear in canon so I don't blame you! I've seen even theories that the revive book is not a revive book at all, but a wish book where your wish is to bring the person back. (because when Dream tried to revive Techno they got a wish) We don't even know how many canon lives a person comes back with when they are revived! Why is it called "limbo" instead of "the afterlife"? Wouldn't limbo be Lady Death's domain? Why is Dream XD feeding on the souls there then, cursing them to a afterlife of misery? There are a lot of unanswered questions!
I saw a very good theory awhile back, i forget who by, but they said that Ghosts are possibly the parts of the person alive or the personality traits that that person didnt want others to see. Ranboo didn't want other to see his suicidal thoughts, Wilbur didn't want others to see his emotional heart, but Schlatt was confident til' the very end, and that's why his ghost is much the same.
I, somewhat similarly, thought that perhaps when someone dies, they are only split into two (a ghost version and a version in limbo) if they are a person with a lot of emotional turmoil. Where you are very divided in yourself, in your head. I think this works for Wilbur and Ranboo, since both tend to compartmentalize their past actions, seeing them as different people entirely (the different burs for Wilbur and Ranboo's enderwalk). And like I said before, both Schlatt and MD were much more confident in themselves.
Feel free to look into this with me! I am open to discussion here! I love talking about the ghosts on the DSMP, I'm even open to talking about hcs regarding Ghostinnit!
#dsmp#dream smp#ghostinnit#ghostbur#ask#artemysty#this actually took ages to answer omg im so sorry#I was actually more dedicated to this ask and like getting my sources right and making sure all my refrances were good and rewatching vods#than i was to the actual essay i had to write in class today#oops lol#hey i would say something even better came out of this#i was able to find all of tubbos lost vods from the new lmanburg era!!! :DDDDDDD#a new era of ghostbur commentary is upon me i can finally confirm all the things ive been saying about him with those early vods#im actually so stoked about finding those tho#anway its late and cold here so im going to log off#but please rb with your thoughts as well!!! friendly ghost-related discussion is encouraged here!!!!#i wont see them til morning but i appricate them!
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hiii!!! omg please please pleasee do a part two of 3 hearts broken cus it fucking slaps miss girl
part 2 to 3 broken hearts!!! ive been so 🥺 at all the lovely comments+interest pt 1 had so thanku all !
summary: serious serious angst again will tom somehow get it back (unlike looking cos boy is a fool)
warnings: again lots of swearing (im British sorry not sorry) / wayyyy too much tea / slating Dom abit (obvs fictional but idk if I like the guy sorry his opinions are :/) / commitment issues
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
read part 1 here!!!!
That was three days ago now. Three days since you'd spoken to your boyfrien- well, Tom. It wasn't evident what the situation was.
The typical British weather brought with it the most ironic pathetic fallacy you could ever see. The clouds were dark and glooming, firing angry pellets of rain out as hard as they could. When you had pulled up on the roadside, it had just been a light drizzle but synchronised with your anxiety levels rising - so did the rain. When you finally opened up the car door, you threw your hoodie open with a sigh before running up the pathway to the front door.
It was the same burgundy red that you knew so well, but this time instead of just letting yourself in - you stood in the rain used the brass knocker thing twice. To be honest, you were hoping that no one was home - but in that house, it was pretty unlikely. After 30 seconds of getting drenched in the downpour, you were about to let yourself in with the spare key before the door swung open.
"Oh! Er Y/n?"
"Yeh um hi." You had to shout a bit over the sound of what must now be classified as a storm.
"Toms not-"
"I know. Can I come in?" As awkward and stunted as this conversation was, if you didn't get out of the rain asap you would literally end up drowned.
“Oh er yeh-yeh yeh come in.”
Harry stammered as he held the door open, gesturing for you to enter into the tiled hallway. Gratefully, you followed, throwing your sopping wet hood back down and wiping your feet on the floor.
"Sorry for just showing up, but I left some scripts here. My management are on my arse to read them and-"
"And you waited till Tom left for mum and dads?" The fluffy-haired boy has caught you red-handed; there was no defence, so you didn't even try.
Because yes, you knew on a Friday afternoon when Tom was home he would always, like clockwork, go to his parents just to kick back and watch gogglebox with both of them. It was only natural then that you chose Friday afternoon to come and pick up your stuff.
"I've been waiting in my car for half an hour till I saw him leave." Harry half laughed at that, still the two of you standing opposite each other in the hallway. "Um, do you… do you hate me Harry?"
Clearly, he hadn't quite been expecting your question going by the way his eyes almost bugged out his head.
"No, I-I, of course, I don't… look, I'm home alone so you fancy a cuppa?" Not being able to help the small chuckle, you nodded appreciatively, following Harry through the house.
"Your answer to everything is tea."
Harry had prepared the two mugs in silence as you sat at the table waiting patiently - if nervously too. You didn't miss how Harry had still used your favourite mug, having had to dig through the cupboard to find the weird square-shaped thing. Once done, he rounded the kitchen island and placed it in front of you, which you instantly cradled in two hands - for the hope of warming you up.
"You cold?" Obviously, it was pretty evident that sitting in your rain-soaked hoodie was not cosy at all. "Hang on a sec."
The boy sprung up again, returning moments later with a hoodie in hand, one he offered out to you with a little smile. The issue was that him and Tom shared clothes, so the hoodie he was kindly offering to you also had been worn by Tom before. Which made it hurt a little bit to wear. It was better than sitting soaked through though.
"How have you been then?"
"Not the best, to be honest, but uh… how about you?"
"Being with Tom while he's fighting with you? Oh, it's a barrel of laughs. You might've escaped it, but I haven't." He was trying to lighten the mood, and you appreciated it, offering him a half-smile that didn't really meet your eyes.
"Yeh sorry about that."
"Don't apologise; it doesn't sound like it's your fault Y/n."
That surprised you. Tom, especially when he was in moods like he was when you argued, wasn't one to admit when he was wrong. It was usually how the world was against him and how he was so hard done by. Accepting responsibility was something he hadn't said to you yet - but at least, small steps.
"He say that?"
"Pretty much… doesn't seem like he's angry at you, but-but he's still angry."
"At the world?" You rolled your eyes; this seemed to be the same old Tom through and through. Still immature. Still not with the right mindset.
"At himself." Harry countered, slightly entertained, when he saw the flash of surprise in your face as he sipped his drink. "And me… if I dare to so much as breathe this week."
This time you properly laughed, and Harry joined in too before the room fell back to silence - except the noise of the rain hitting the garden patio slats. You swirled the tea round in your mug, feeling the brunette's eyes on you. He'd always been your fake little brother too, since you'd met the Hollands way back 3 and a half years ago. Tom and yourself were barely adults, which meant the twins were still proper children. Harry had always been the one that understood you. Hollands, by nature, loved humans - loved to talk, to chat, to gossip. But sometimes, doing all that socialising got too much for you, as it did for Harry. He was the only one that seemed to understand social exhaustion. So when those moments had hit, you'd kept each other company in silence.
He got you, sometimes in ways your own boyfriend didn't.
"You know why he got so worked up, right?" You shook your head, looking up curiously. "Dad got under his skin on his birthday zoom thing."
Ah, now that did seem to coincide with the start of Tom's more petulant phase. To be fair, Tom had been asking to move in together for near enough a year now - but it was only in the past month it seemed to be the only thing you'd talk about and obviously only three days since the flight back. Dom's birthday barely a week ago, whilst you and Tom were both filming - except Tom had managed to get a day off where you hadn't. So you hadn't heard this conversation.
"What'd he say?"
"Was talking about how he and mum were settling down at Toms age, joked about how you rejected him, said maybe you were holding out for something better."
"Something better?" Harry sighed, leaning forward onto his elbows.
"He'd seen an article just off a trashy tabloid… it named you Hollywood's golden girl or something, said you could have the pick of any person on the planet…"
Of all the people in the world, why is Tom affected by shit journalism? He knows how much bullshit people write. He knows how it's all made up, exaggerated nonsense. And what he should know, completely and totally, is how much you love him. And if he didn't, was that your fault? Had you done something wrong, something to make him doubt you?
Harry seemed to notice the internal dialogue going on in your head, adding to the point. "It wasn't the article though, it was the fact dad said it."
Hmmm.
You and Dom got on; it wasn't like you hated the possible future father in law or whatever. Just…. you had very different outlooks. As much as Tom prided himself on how' grounded his family keeps him' -to you at least, they aren't entirely at sea level either. They'd never really had any particular struggles in life. They were the definition of middle class, and that's about it. They lived in a posh suburb of London, had all their family still around. It was the perfect family.
And whilst you were in no illusions about how privileged your life was now. It hadn't always been. You'd never had the 'nuclear' family. Instead, only your dad and a string of dodgy and fleeting stepmothers while struggling to make ends meet. So you were just always wary of Dom, of his opinions that so often his boys took for gospel. They always seemed pretty sheltered and close-minded.
And yet, Tom was a grown man.
"I get that, I just… Tom should know that we know more about our relationship than his dad. I mean,… have I done something wrong? Made him think I'm not in this for the long haul?"
"No nonono Y/n he's just… well he's an idiot, isn't he? I don't think he properly understands why you're cautious about moving and everything. He's just an idio- "
Harry was cut off for lightly insulting his brother by the sound of the front door opening, both of your heads swivelling towards the source. You then met Harry's eyes in a panic, to which he replied relatively simply.
"Just talk to each other. For my sake." You would've argued if it weren't for the fact you were so focused on Tom's shuffling around in the entrance hallway - back early from his parents.
"Baz? Where you at? I thought I saw Y/n's car and-"
"Kitchen!!!" Before Tom could say anything else, possibly landing himself in more trouble, Harry interrupted as his chair screeched while standing up. And then Tom was just there. Standing in the doorway, his arms dropping limply to his side as he noticed you. Everything about that moment seemed to freeze, when you locked eyes with him for the first time in three days. It didn't go unnoticed, the way his Adams apple bobbed, the way his eyes widen. The boy looked plain and simply terrified.
It was Harry who broke the silence, after giving you a stern look that said 'stay'. The younger Holland boy walked up to Tom and spoke.
"Try actually talking and actually listening about your problems with each other." And then he was gone, down the hallway and up the stairs.
For a few moments, Tom stayed absolutely stationary, now staring at where Harry had been when speaking to the both of you (but mainly Tom). Long enough to put your sense of unease at an all-time high, ready to make a break for it.
"If you don't want to talk, then I can leav-"
"NO!" Apparently snapping out of it, Tom exclaimed loud enough to make you flinch from your seat. "Sorry! I-I just… I wasn't expecting to… you know, to see you."
"Yeh I just uh- just came to pick up some scripts… Harry cornered me with a tea, though; otherwise, I'd be…."
"Baz thinks the whole world could be fixed with tea."
"that's what I said!" You instinctively responded, forgetting the fact you're supposed to be mad at him, and just for a second falling back into your normal flow.
Tom didn't even try to hide his grin in response, until you quickly corrected your face- then he did too. Turning around to put the kettle on for himself. Because right now, he needed to fix his whole world, and he needed all the help he could get. For a period, the only noise was the sound of the kettle boiling, then the teaspoon clinking against the mug as he stirred - until he padded over, taking the seat across from you.
"So."
"So."
"It's been a while," Tom stated the bloody obvious.
"You never called."
"Didn't think you'd want me to."
You thought that the early signs weren't all that auspicious. His ability to read a situation once again failing.
"I wanted you to say something."
"Say what?"
"What do you think Tom?" He replied to the sarcastic tone by sucking in a sharp breath, holding it for a second, before slowly exhaling. As if trying to compose himself, take time to think of a response - a mature move for him.
"Well, I think you want me to say sorry? For being so moody and not waiting for you and for upsetting those kids. And thanks too, for covering for me?"
You just hummed. Waiting for him to continue. Because yes, you did deserve all those things. But you also deserved more. An apology for, oh I don't know, saying he didn't think you loved him? It was a wait that never ended, he had nothing more to add.
"Going by your face, I take it I missed something?"
The bloody cheek of it.
"Theres nothing else? Nothing else at all? …" You gave him that chance, the opportunity but all he could respond with was a shake of his head. "You thought I was fine about you saying that I don't love you?" You hadn't intended on raising your voice, but really you hadn't realised you did till after the fact. To blinded by rage at his ignorance.
"You want to talk about this now?"
"When else Tom?" You sighed, realising he perhaps wasn't ready for this conversation. Maybe he needed more time to think things through, have sense talked into him by various wiser family members. Or maybe, he never would be. That was the worst-case scenario. But also… you're most likely prediction.
He shuffled in his seat, clearing his voice but not saying anything. Not a peep.
"I have spent three years of my life with you. I've had countless nights of too little sleep because that was the only time you could facetime. I've exposed my relationship to the world and people's opinions because you didn't want to hide. All I've done is love you. How could you even say that?" There might've been tears in your eyes, yet you were determined to keep them at bay. You needed to have this out, one way or another, to be clear and cohesive and logical. No time to cry.
"Y/n I know that, I…" He sighed, instinctively reaching for your hand, but you were quicker to pull it away. There was hurt in his eyes, but so there should be. "It just sometimes feels like that's it for you. That yeh you love me but you just want to standstill. That this is as much as it'll ever be."
Your emotions were suddenly uncontainable. Your voice croaked as you whispered, "Have I done something wrong?"
"No love, nonono if that's how you feel then that's okay. But it's something I'm not… shit this is hard." He took a pause to take a sip of his drink, your glazed eyes never leaving his. "I don't think I can stand still anymore. And yeh I was pissy and childish the other day because my dad got under my skin about the whole moving in thing… But these past few days, it just has got me thinking. Because I love you, so much."
This time when he reached out to grab your hand, you actually leaned into it yourself. Not because you were giving in, but because this hurt. This hurt so fucking much that you needed something to ground you, or else god knows. Because the way he was speaking, it sounded so finite.
"I love you too."
"I do know, which is…is why this is so hard." At the very least, Tom had conceded that.
The conversation ceased to silence yet again. The room felt so cold; even Tom/Harry's hoodie was doing nothing to keep you from the endless empty cold that seemed to be coming from within.
"When I re-registered my health card last month, and I made you my emergency contact on it. I-I made you my next of kin on everything actually. I didn't think about it twice. And-and this-"You pulled your phone out of your back pocket, immediately pulling up the app onto the open page. "This is my Pinterest board for our baby's nursery theme. I know-" You paused, to quickly wipe your cheeks clear of the tear tracks that may or may not have been there. "I know it's probably a long way away, but I just love the Scandinavian theme." You laughed at yourself, suddenly embarrassed at your blabbering and quickly pulled up a different app. "And this… this was from the other week when I was helping Y/bf/n start her vows." Hands trembling as you turned the phone around for Tom to see again. "She was finding it really tricky so she said, what would you say to Tom on your wedding, so-so I made this list." You only dared to look at him when you were sure he'd be reading through that note.
It was bizarre because he looked… well, he looked happy. Here you were feeling traumatised, showing things that you'd barely even deeped how committed they were - and he was pleased? Feeling the fire burn once again inside of your chest, you quickly swiped the phone away and back into your pocket. Only then did he look up, eyes widening - presumably at quite how psychotic you looked.
"So don't you dare say that I don't want a future with you."
You said it with such force, there was a pause. Tom letting those words sink deep into his brain. The way his expression flickered minutely gave you hope. You thought he got it. You thought he really understood now.
"But why don't you want to move in then?"
There it was again. He knew why. But he didn't get it. And, probably, he never would.
You were about to crash completely. So you ran. As fast as your legs could carry you, not even aware of your chair crashing to the floor in your wake. You ran out of that house and away from him. Away from who you had thought was the love of your life.
?give tom a final chance w one last part?
feedback is always v v appreciated <3
tom taglist : @lovehollandy12 @hollandlover19 @thefernandasantana @hunnybunimdun @hallecarey1@cedricdiggorysimpp @msmimimerton @hollandfanficlove @pandaxnienke @crossyourpeter @thegirlwiththeimpala @tom-softie @sunwardsss @spiitfiiires @radcloudenthusiast @ladykxxx08
people i think might be interestd in this (sorry if not just let me know and i'll remove the tag!!!): @obiwanownsmyass @wildxwidow @parkersvogue @coffeewithoutcaffeine @tomhollandlol @thefallenbibliophilequote @clumsymandu @hiraethenthusiast @mannien @abrielleholland @evermorehabit @niallberry @greatpizzascissorstaco @runawayolives @annathesillyfriend @letsgotothemoonlight @lovelybarnes
#tom x reader#tom holland fic#tomholland#tom holland#tom holland x reader#tom holland fluff#tom holland angst#famous!reader#tom holland x famous!reader#tom holland x actress!reader#harry holland
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HERE'S SOME OLDER PARTY HEADCANONS TO BLESS UR ASKS.
(this is in a alternate dimension where el doesn't sacrifice herself to close the gate to the upside down LMAO 😭)
1: LUMAX
Lucas is a BASKETBALL COACH (argue with the WALL) and Max is his hot MILF wife and she's probably a hockey (or soccer, or volleyball or even baseball) coach for the same school he coaches at (I literally don't really even know why but I just FEEL the energy with her yk?) and they both live in CALIFORNIA together and NOBODY can change my mind. (P.S THEY ALSO HAVE TWO KIDS)
2: EL.
El works at a HAIR SALON. (argue with ur mother on this one look Ik she's gonna die in season 5 but LET ME BE HAPPY FOR ONCE, LET ME LIVE MY FANTASY) and she's literally the NICEST barber EVER and she's rlly good at her job and she lives in a apartment in Chicago or New York or some city and she has TWO CATS called MITTENS and DAISY and they are literally like her children, like she'd commit ATROCITIES for those Cats. she has a CRUSH on her neighbor called Stephanie and she literally CANNOT get the courage up to talk to her, she loves fashion, and she has a CURATED jewelry collection. but she has such a GRANDMA sense of style yk? like after El experiments with her style and everything it is STRAIGHT to the the Long knitted cardigans and Long maxi skirts and her hand knitted crochet hats and scarves and flowy long sleeve dresses.
also El hand-knitted STOCKINGS for Max and Lucas on Christmas Eve and she also made little booties for Lucas and Max's Kids and it was the most ADORABLE thing EVER I swear to GOD- 😭
3: DUZIE.
Dustin is a full-fledged SCIENTIST, he's your odd and quirky college lab professor who's a little bizarre sometimes but is actually pretty cool and funny, him and Suzie teach at the same college (AWWW) and they actually have a lot of kids (don't ask me why those are just the vibes) and they are literally all like Dustin which annoys Suzie but in like a fondness kinda way, all of his kids are eccentric and really bright, and yk that Dad thing where they hold their kids upside down by the legs and spin them around the air like a monkey? yeah Dustin does that and it totally freaks Suzie out LMAO, their Family is literally so LOVING and PERFECT and SWEET that it makes me wanna CRY 😭 😭 😭 DUZIE IS THE BEST FR.
WAIT SHUT UP I JUST REALIZED.
BECAUSE SUZIE IS MARRIED TO DUSTIN THAT WOULD MAKE HER-
✨SUZIE HENDERSON✨
SHUT UPPPPPPPP 😭😭😭
AND LIKE-
DUSTINS FAMILY WOULD BE THE ✨HENDERSON FAMILY✨
UGHHHHHH SHUT UP THEY ARE LITERALLY SO PERFECT 🤧😭
(I wish I could write about Byler but I have SO MANY THOUGHTS ON THEM THAT I'D EXCEED THE CHARACTER LIMIT)
(whatever I'll just simplify it ig 😭)
4: BYLER
Byler get's married (I really do feel as if they would want to get married) Byler are literally the best uncles, Mike is a WRITER (and no he's not a fucking bowling alley worker my boy deserves BETTER than that) like he writes Fantasy Books and shit and Will is still a Artist and a REALLY GOOD ONE at that, and I don't care WHERE they live AS LONG AS IT'S NOT HAWKINS. like I literally couldn't bear to see them STILL LIVING in that hell-hole 😭 also we literally all know that Mike is SHIT at cooking and Will is GREAT at it.
5: THE PARTY IN GENERAL
The Party visits each other every sholiday and they have a jolly good time 😊
THAT'S IT HOPE U ENJOYED THEM BYLERS WEDDING IS NEXT.
OH MY GOD I LOVED THIS SO MUCH THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART AND IM SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG FOR ME TO ANSWER😭
i completely see the vision for duzie omg especially dustin that’s so cute jfjejfjejd and YES MIKE BEING A WRITER! YES!
el having a crush on her neighbor stephanie is so cute jdjejdj pls you need to write aged up fan fics of all members of the party it’s so cute😭
PLEASE DO SEND THE BYLER WEDDING ILL TRY MY BEST TO NOT TAKE AS LONG TO ANSWER😭😭 <3
#el#el hopper#mike wheeler#will byers#max mayfield#lucas sinclair#dustin henderson#suzie stranger things#duzie#lumax#byler#lesbian el#el is a lesbian#the party#stranger things
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omg im sorry i took so long to respond id love to see a second part of "a second chance?" with lucifer!!!! only if its okay with you, can you make its genre comfort? please my heart cant handle unresolved angst but your writing is an exception!!!
-@momobunni
hihi my dude im so glad you liked it!! ^¬^
I have finally, after many a month, delivered your fic
this was a lot of fun thank you (:
enjoy <3
(read part one here: A Second Chance?)
Perfectly Bittersweet
wc: 287
genre: comfort
tw: none
The words got lost in their throat as they let out a slight choking sound. They knew the answer why were they unable to-
"I understand. You...you need time."
Raising his head, Lucifer looked into MC's eyes, a watery smile on his face. He'd always loved the colour of their eyes. Getting up, he intended to leave, let them have their space.
And as he turned his back, taking a step towards the door-
"...I do."
MC's voice, barely a whisper, wavered with emotion.
Lucifer stopped dead.
Shuffling off the bed, MC moved towards Lucifer, raising their hand to lovingly cup his cheek.
Lucifer felt the pad of their thumb trace his lips, warm feather light touches against his smooth, cold skin. A moment of silence passed like this, a comfortable silence, broken by MC.
"I take you back, Lucifer."
Their voice was clearer, more confident this time: the choice one they were happy with, one they consciously wanted to make. Not controlled, not forced: their decision.
A dry sob left his throat as Lucifer wrapped his arms tightly around MC. They wanted him...they really, truly, wanted him.
Both were crying again, stupid tears making the hug rather soggy and uncomfortable.
MC started laughing first, Lucifer following suit. They broke apart and, amid the sobbing and the giggles, Lucifer leaned down.
Their lips met. In those three seconds they shared the last few weeks: the resentment, the anger, the sadness - but also the love, the passion.
Bittersweet.
With barely audible voices they spoke, lips mere millimetres apart.
"I love you."
"I love you too, Lucifer."
It wasn't perfect on paper, it never had been, it never will be.
But it was perfect to them: perfectly bittersweet.
hdkshgs tumblr shadowbanned me ages ago now and idk if they actually unshadowbanned me when i contacted them...I really hope people see this XD
#please leave a comment if you want me to add any tw ^-^#obey me#obey me fic#obey me luci#obey me lucifer#obey me shall we date#obey me swd#obey me mc#obey me luci x reader#obey me lucifer x mc#obey me lucifer x reader
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hiluuu! can i request a scenario/drabble for tsukishima, kuroo, oikawa, and akaashi where they're in a heated argument with their fem!s/o, then she suddenly faints? turns out she had a fever since the morning and hid it from them but got worse during their fight?
their s/o faints during a heated argument
with tsukishima k, kuroo t, oikawa t, akaashi k
a/n: thank you for requesting i hope you enjoy, im sorry this took forever?????? they get longer each one omg
tsukishima k
you don't even remember why you both are fighting, as he sips another insult your headache gets worse. as you don't say anything just raise your hand to your head he gets even more frustrated. "can you at least act like your age, ignoring me isn't going to resolve the issue." he says not noticing how your body starts to shuffle as you try and keep your balance. rolling his eyes turning to the door, "im not going to deal with this today-" before he can finish he hears a loud thud, turning around he sees your body on the floor. rushing to the floor next to you, "y/n?" bringing his hands up to your head, biting his lip cursing at himself in his head. picking up and lays you down in the bed as he gets water and a towel. when you wake up again you notice youre in bed, trying to sit up youre pushed back down. “don't do that, that wasn't cool” he says in a low tone, handing you a glass and some medicine. taking them both with a nod, “thank you kei and im sorry” you say handing the glass back to him, setting it down on the table he takes your hand. gently kissing the back of it and resting his head on your hand. “why are you on the floor?” you softly smile at him hearing a small ‘shut up.’
kuroo t
the fight started because he started to prioritize the volleyball team more than you. it didnt bother you that he stayed late, went early to practice, it didnt bother you until he started canceling plans with you. he told you repeatedly he would spend more time with you, today not being any different waiting in the rain in front of the cafe you both decided to eat at. not until 10 minutes had passed you went back to the school, walking to the gym with angry steps you opened the door roughly. the whole team looking at you soaking wet, frozen for a second he walks over to you. “y/n what are you doing here?” he says in an annoyed tone. “don't give me that bullshit tetsurō, we had plans today i waited for you to only be stood up again, are you even serious about this? us?” you say motioning your hand between him and you. rolling his eyes and he huffs, “can you stop being dramatic? im a captain this team needs me i didnt know you could be so selfish” widening your eyes at him, trying to catch your breath you close your eyes. “selfish? me selfish? you have some nerve i'll be leaving since i dont wanna bother the captain and his team” you say sarcastically, stepping back outside you start coughing. kuroo following behind you, “this conversation isn't done yet” he says grabbing your wrist, turning you around and his eyes widen. “y/n? you look pale are you okay?” he says as he does your eyes roll back and your legs give out. taking you in his arms he rushed inside asking the guys to grab towels to dry you off. sitting down on the floor with you in between his legs, he holds you close feeling guilty. feeling you stir awake he kisses your cheek, “im so sorry babe this is my fault, if i had just been there you wouldnt have been waiting in the rain” he says hugging you tighter. “im serious about us more than anything. i'll try harder to put more effort into our relationship. “i trust you tetsu and do you have any medicine? my heads killing me” you say smiling, he smiles and hands you a bottle of pills and a water.
oikawa t
sitting on the couch, rubbing your temples. “tooru can we please talk about this? youve been ignoring me all day” you say looking at him as he paces the room. “oh now you wanna talk? i thought you were too busy with iwa to notice me” he said stopping to look at you. “wow why are you so mad? what does iwaizumi have to do with this?” you say giving him a confused face as you rest your hand on the back of the couch. “y/n why dont you just date him huh? you obviously like him so much, why are you even with me?” he says getting louder each word. “literally what?” you saying this getting him more frustrated. sighing at those words he runs his hands through his hair, “i saw you both hugging if i knew you were just jumping my friends maybe i what've listened to all those girls.” “okay now what the actual fuck tooru? i can't hug a friend all of a sudden? did you just imply that i am cheating? i cannot believe you” you say feeling your anger bubble up, he opens his mouth to say something. “no no! because how dare you, you have girls all over you everywhere trying to take pictures and give you gifts, you expect me to worship the ground like they do dont you? guess what im not, you dont get to accuse me of cheating because i hugged someone that someone being your closest friend just what person do you take me as huh?” you say getting up fast, maybe too fast as the pounding in your head gets louder. leaning your weight on the couch as you continue, “me and iwaizumi share one simple goal and thats to keep your ass in line, all those late nights and you overworking yourself, you not coming to anyone for help and your bratty ass attitude hes the only one who'll help me deal with you, im not gonna let you blame him because all hes done is help you.” you say getting the strength to get closer to him as you try and take a step your legs falter. his initial reaction to everything you said had his eyes widened and mouth agape, seeing you almost fall sent him over to you trying to help. “no i can do i-” you say as you start to fall and everything goes black. opening your eyes slowly you feel something cool on your head, “hey youre up” a voice says softly. looking over to see tooru next to you as he grabs your hand, before you could say anything else he speaks up. “let me talk for a bit yeah?” he asks as he looks at your joined hands, whispering a soft “okay” he continues. “im sorry, im sorry for not noticing you weren't feeling good, im sorry for saying you cheated, im sorry for yelling, i just got insecure after i heard some girls talk about how cute you and iwa look and seeing you both hug like that just set me off” he says lifting your hands and kisses your knuckles. “i like how you dont worship the ground i step on, i like how you fight back but when i need you most youre always there. i appreciate everything you and iwa do, i love you y/n.” he finishes and looks at you with teary eyes, pulling him down into a hug you whisper “i love you too.”
akaashi k
now arguing with him isnt a normal thing, usually you both can speak calmly and work it out. he gets frustrated because you're not listening and he's been having a stressed week and just kinda blows up. sighing as he runs his hands through his hair, breathing in and out slowly trying to calm himself down. you roll your eyes, “keiji im fine can you just leave me alone, you dont have to treat me like a baby- '' before you could finish he lets out a small mocking laugh. “i wouldnt treat you like one if you didnt act like one, y/n grow up and take some responsibility so /i/ dont have to be the bad guy, the stressed one, the one who has to take care of you.” staring at him with wide eyes he continues, “you wanted me to stop treating you like a baby stop looking so shocked.” you feel a tickle in your throat, trying to hold it in hoping if youre quiet enough you could sneak away. ultimately failing and having a coughing fit you feel your legs get wobbly. “were you trying to hold it in? so childish” he says looking away about to walk off, turning his head to look at you before he walks away he sees your eyes roll back. you wake up on the couch with a wet towel and a blanket on you, slowly sitting up and looking towards the kitchen you see akaashi quietly making you food. looking back at the table you see a glass and some medicine. taking the items and washing them down alerted akaashi to you being awake, rushing to you he looks down at his hands as he picks at them. “how are you feeling?” he asks quietly, you answer with a quick “fine.” sitting on the side of the couch he faces you, “im sorry theres really no excuse for the way i acted i just i hate seeing you trying to be okay when youre not.” scooting closer you rest your head on his shoulder, “if what its worth i like when you baby me” smiling at you he kisses your forehead. “i'll remember that.”
not proofread
#haikyu x reader#haikyu#haikyuu#tsukishima x reader#kuroo x reader#oikawa x reader#akaashi x reader#tsukishima x y/n#kuroo x y/n#oikawa x y/n#akaashi x y/n#tsukishima x you#kuroo x you#oikawa x you#akaashi x you
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hi hi hi could i request a hawk imagine where it’s an enemies to lovers kinda thing, so hawk is still in cobra kai and y/n is in miyagi do. basically tori hurts her and he sees her after and gets protective over her, then they get close and kinda secretly date... something like that haha THANK YOUUU <33333
Do Better — Eli Hawk Moskowitz x Female!Reader
HI OMG IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG. I literally had an entirely different fic at like 8k words for this before I decided it didn’t fit close enough to the prompt and I just completely started over and this one was even longer than the first so that’s why it took me literal ages LOL.
includes; swearing, fluff, fighting, so much angst
words; 11,394 (im sorry its a whole ass novel)
this takes place late s2, after demetri and hawk’s friendship ends but before eagle fang forms!
Most of your time in high-school you spent in a bubble, keeping to yourself and just your few friends. You didn’t involve yourself in other people’s crap very often, but when an all-out karate war happened at the end of your junior year, you couldn’t keep lurking in the shadows anymore.
Bullying was becoming heavy at your school, and while you weren’t usually a target, you grew tired of watching other people get hurt. Primarily, by a familiar face to you-- Eli Moskowitz.
Not that you knew him particularly well, but you remembered the shy boy you’d shared classes with, and you always tried your best to be nice to him knowing how others treated him.
You never would’ve thought that now he’d be the bully, destroying the confidence of other kids who were just like him.
“Look at this kid,” He laughed to his friend, Mitch. The two boys were standing in the hall, hovering over a small, scrawny boy who looked terrified. “You wanna be in Cobra Kai? Well, see, we had to be un-flinched first. We can do that for you right now, though. See how much you can take.” He teased, threatening a punch, watching the boy wince at his movement.
When you were in the halls on your way to your next class, you witnessed this horrible incident. You watched for a moment, before deciding that it was time for you to step out of your bubble. “Hey, leave him alone.” You said annoyedly, urging the boys to give it up.
Hawk turned to you and leered, and Mitch pushed the kid against the locker so he wouldn’t move while they dealt with you. “Be careful who you talk to like that, princess.” He moved dangerously close, and despite the feelings of anger you had towards him, your stomach dropped a little at the nickname.
Not letting it affect you, you came back bitterly. “Oh yeah? And who am I talking to, Eli?” His face contorted in disgust at the use of his real name. “You know, it’s sad, how you became everything you used to despise. I remember the other side of you, you were sweet..” You said, smiling to your self in remembrance. “And now look at you.” Looking at him in resentment, you finished.
Turning angrily on his heel at your words, Hawk punched the boy in the face and let him go running. He looked back at you with a look of victory, and Mitch smirked. “You better watch your back.” Hawk said threateningly, and knocked his shoulder into yours as he walked to his class.
Through the rest of the day, Hawk thought about you. He knew who you were; Y/N, the only girl to ever be nice to him during his shier days. He remembered the feeling he got any time you’d talked to him, and also how pretty you looked each time you did.
He had almost forgotten until then, how much he had always admired you. He even wanted to ask you out all that time ago, but now too much has changed. Way too much, clearly, because when the commercial for Miyagi-Do came out, you were quick to join.
It was that interaction with Hawk that really set you off, actually. You wanted to be able to stop the cruelty, and you thought that joining Miyagi-Do for defense would be a good start.
Little did you know, the rivalry would only grow.
As weeks passed, Miyagi-Do gained students and flourished. But in the meanwhile, Cobra Kai only got rougher, angrier, and just.. worse, in general.
You had done your best to avoid fights, (like a true Miyagi-Do would) but on a particularly bad day of yours, you were unlucky enough to find yourself running into Tory outside of school.
Being close friends with Sam, you knew to stay clear of Tory after hearing what she did to her. You thought Tory was a vile human being, though, and if she were to start anything-- she was probably the one person you wouldn’t hesitate to absolutely destroy.
When on your way to the dojo, you took a pit stop at a convenience store to pick up some snacks since you had some time to kill between after school and when practice started. You were met with an unpleasant surprise on your way out, when you saw Tory approaching the store.
The two of you made eye contact as you crossed paths, and you decided to ignore her and keep walking. Until, as you walked past each other, Tory stuck out her leg and tripped you over the concrete pathway.
“Are you kidding me, bitch?” You pushed yourself up, scoffing at her, and she smiled maniacally. “What’d you just call me?” She teased, obviously looking for a fight.
As much as you wanted to stay calm, you were pushed over the edge. “You heard me, bitch.” You repeated, letting her know you were not afraid. “What’s your problem? I keep away from you and you just can’t help yourself from starting something. I’ve never even done anything to you.” You confronted Tory, looking for an explanation for her behavior.
It was true, you’d hardly ever interacted with her-- but since you’re in Miyagi-Do and friends with Sam, she just didn’t like you. And Tory being Tory, if she didn’t like someone, she was going to be a bitch about it.
She laughed at your attempt to reason with her, and looked at you in self-satisfaction. “I just think it’d be fun to watch you bleed.” She seemed proud at the insult, stepping forward threateningly-- but you thought it was pretty lame.
Clearly, she had no real answer for the questions you asked her. She was far gone in her own world, using only anger to dictate her decisions.
You had let out a disappointed sigh, shaking your head, and turned to simply leave the situation, remembering that it wasn’t worth it. But Tory had other plans.
She grabbed your wrist, twisting it painfully forcing your body to face her. You quickly rotated it to release yourself from her grip, and punched her in the face with your newly freed hand.
“Leave me alone, Tory. This fighting for no reason crap is bullshit.” You said, stepping out of her proximity and holding your fists up in case of needed defense. Tory felt blood trickle from her nose, and as she wiped it from her face, she threw you a sickening sneer.
Seemingly avid on letting her rage out on you, she only continued. “You’re pathetic.” She cackled, taking a swing at you. You blocked this, but the movement left an opening for her to then kick your stomach, which sent you to the ground.
Before you could manage to get up again, she was hovering over you, punching your face repeatedly. It wasn’t until the pain was sinking in that you finally gained enough power to push her off, rolling forward and pinning her down tightly.
You grabbed a fistful of her hair, turning her face towards the ground. “Give it up, Tory.” She stayed quiet, breathing heavily, until she used her remaining strength to free her arm and dig her elbow into your side.
You fell back at this, and you were now both sat on the ground, mere inches from each other. “Seriously, I mean what’s the point? What are you gaining from this besides a couple of bruises?” You stood up, asking again.
You genuinely wanted to know, what could make a person so heartless. You had done nothing to provoke her, yet she was so intent on hurting you. Your question had unfortunately only sparked her rage again, the way you acted so ‘above it all,’ in Tory’s mind made her only angrier.
She rose, charging towards you for another strike, when the owner of the convenience store came out. “What the hell is this? Do I need to call the police?” The man asked. He had caught you in the blocking position of Tory’s attack, and she bitterly pushed herself off of you.
“You got lucky.” She spat, walking back towards the store she was originally on her way into. “Think about it, Tory! Why?” You yelled as she walked away, wanting your final words to sink into her.
You assured the owner that you were fine, and that he didn’t need to get the cops involved. You took out your phone and checked your complexion in the front camera, cringing seeing the cuts and bruises from Tory’s punches all over your face.
But remembering the bloody nose you had given her in your first punch, you smiled to yourself. Looking at your phone’s clock, you had certainly killed the time, but much more than you had wanted to. You were going to be late, so you texted Sam, alerting her that you got in a fight (sparing the details for later,) and that you would be late to practice.
You figured you could just clean up your cuts when you got home, it wasn’t a big deal, probably. But on your walk to the dojo, a passing car slowed at the sight of you. You started walking faster, instantly assuming the worst, but when the window rolled down, you heard a familiar, extremely unpleasant voice. Hawk.
“On your way to practice, huh? Still no car?” He taunted, knowing you still hadn’t saved up enough to buy your own. You glanced at him and rolled your eyes, continuing to walk down the sidewalk. How many enemies were you going to bump into today?
That was when he noticed your face. “Jesus, Y/N, what happened to you?” He laughed, fully stopping the car. You halted and responded annoyedly, “Tory happened. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to be late.” Turning back towards the walkway, you continued down the street.
But before you could get far, Hawk had gotten out of his car and caught up to you. “You’re not seriously headed to the dojo like that are you?” He said confusedly, trying to keep up with your pace.
You looked at him like his question was stupid, and continued walking. At your ignoring of him, he pushed his point further. “You need to clean those cuts.” He said, still following close behind you as you walked.
“Since when do you care?” You said irritated, continuing to disregard the boy’s words. At this, he finally stopped following. “You know what, fine.” He stood, speaking sharply, and you looked at him curiously at his abruptness. “Just trying to help, or, be nice or whatever.” He muttered aggravatedly, raising his hands in mocking surrender at your attitude.
You had ignored his concerns, because quite honestly you didn’t believe he was actually concerned. You had assumed it was some sort of set up for a new insult, or a way to just mess up your face even more.
“Oh yeah? That’s pretty unusual for you, isn’t it?” You said rudely, engaging back in the conversation. Hawk pursed his lips together and shifted uncomfortably.
You didn’t know it, but Hawk still cared about you. He may have changed, but his feelings for you hadn’t— as much as he tried to get them to. And right now, seeing you hurt, and since there was nobody around to judge him for it, he wanted to help you.
“Look, I’ve got some first aid stuff in my car. Let me help.” He stayed where he was, not wanting to provoke you, and spoke softly, nudging his head towards his car.
You narrowed your eyes looking at him, feeling skeptical of accepting the invitation. He noticed your hesitation, but did not back down, looking at you expectantly for an answer.
You let out an exasperated sigh, and walked towards his car without saying a word. Continuing to argue with him about it seemed like a waste of time to you at this point.
Hawk smiled to himself in relief that you gave in. Hurrying after you, he retrieved the first aid kit from the trunk of his car and ran to open the passenger seat door.
“You wanna sit?” He pointed at the seat, motioning you to take it. You dropped your bag and got in the car, still glaring at Hawk.
He seemed sincere in his intentions, but you really just wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. Who knows what he could really be planning?
As you took your seat, you reached out to take the kit from Hawk’s grasp. “Hold on,” he said, moving the box away from your reach.
You gave him a bothered look, scrunching your eyebrows in confusion. “Have you ever even done this before?” He said, referring to cleaning up after a fight.
“No?” You shrugged, “It can’t be that hard.” You said impatiently, reaching for the box again. “Can you please just let me do it? I’ll show you how for next time.” He practically pleaded, wanting to make sure it was done right so you healed properly.
You didn’t understand why it was such a big deal to him, but you were tired of going back and forth with him. “Whatever, just make it quick. I’ll miss all of karate class at this rate.” You complained, moving closer to the edge of the seat so Hawk could reach you.
The height of his car made you two the same height, so Hawk was face to face with you as you were seated. “Hmm, miss a Miyagi-Do lesson? I don’t see the problem.” He joked, almost making light of their rivalry.
You smiled lightly at that, playfully rolling your eyes, but not saying anything. He stood close enough to examine your face, and it was close enough to make you both nervous.
It was silent as he opened the kit and started to clean your cuts, but you broke it to ask a question that was burning in you. “Why are you doing this?”
He looked at you for a second, looking reluctant to answer your question. “What do you mean?” He dodged, continuing to tend to your bruises.
You laughed, knowing full well he knew what you meant, but deciding to answer him anyway. “Why are you helping me? We aren’t friends.” You said plainly, making sure to keep your face still.
“I don’t know, you just obviously needed it.” He brushed off the seriousness of the question, starting to dab the cloth over your lip so you couldn’t talk.
You pushed his hand away lightly. “That’s hardly an answer. You’d never help a Miyagi-Do, so why?” You snapped, not letting his hand near your face again until he answered.
He finally took a step back, and stared at you looking defeated. “You’re the only one who was ever nice to me. Before.. this.” He pointed to his hair, referring to the era of The Hawk.
You crossed your arms skeptically. “Aren’t you forgetting someone?” You asked expectantly, and he rolled his eyes. “Demetri’s different, okay? He betrayed me. But you..”
He trailed off, struggling to maintain eye contact with you. “You were never anything but good to me. You deserve better.” He said, and your heart both stung and fluttered at once, trying to figure out what was going on with him.
You wondered if his actions were truly coming from a place of sincerity. It was very unlike him to be anything but an asshole, so hearing something like that come out of his mouth really made you think.
He tried to ignore the sentiment he had just said by walking back towards you and starting to tend to your wounds again, but you only pushed him back for a second time.
“I don’t understand what happened to you.” You said sadly, examining the way he stood. “I changed.” He said monotonously, trying to avoid matching your energy of seriousness.
His hot-and-cold temper was starting to annoy you, the way he would open up just to close right back down again.
“Yeah, and not for the better. Are you even happy?” You said, frustrated, looking at him hard. His face turned sour.
“More than I was before!” He yelled, stepping towards you threateningly. You were taken aback at his outburst, suddenly feeling small as he grew angrier. “My life was hell, remember?” His voice cracked, and he tried to calm himself as he saw the way you leaned back into your seat uncomfortably.
“Look, I’m sorry for keeping you, I probably cleaned you up enough so... just go.” He said softly, sounding regretful as he moved out of the way so you could get out of the car.
You furrowed your brows in confusion. You felt completely clueless on how he was feeling, and you didn’t want to leave it like this. “Hawk-“, you started, but he cut you off. “No, just go.” He pointed away. “I was stupid to think I’d get a second chance with you.” He muttered to himself, turning to walk around to the drivers seat of his car.
“Wh— second chance? What do you mean?” You shouted after him and hopped off the seat, grabbing his arm before he could get too far.
At your tug of his arm, he looked back at you with the most intense feeling in his eyes. Not wanting to use his words anymore, Hawk turned to grab your wrist from the hand that was already resting on his arm, and pulled you against him.
Hawk smashed his lips onto yours, holding you loosely in fear of your rejection. You weren’t expecting it, but you didn’t pull away. Your kiss continued and you subconsciously shuffled backwards, now being able to lean against the side of the car as he grew more passionate in his movements.
Being with him like this felt amazing, but it was confusing, too-- you had to pull away and clear up this situation.
Finally letting each other go, Hawk looked at you with glossy eyes. You had no idea where all of this came from or what to say, so you were silent as you waited for him to explain.
He knew what you were waiting for, and sighed deeply before expressing how he felt. “I just feel like after everything, I owe you my best.” Hawk said quietly, and you waited for him to go on, having not yet made up your mind on the whole situation.
You enjoyed the kiss, yes-- but you didn’t understand why it had happened, and that was something you needed to know before anything could proceed further. Hawk was a jerk, and he was going to have a lot of explaining to do for you to suddenly be able to forget that.
He moved even closer, and reached his hand out to brush your hair away from your face. “And I don’t like seeing you hurt.” He whispered, ghosting his fingers across the bruises on your face.
You felt a shiver down your spine as he touched you, closing your eyes in the moment. “And,” he pulled away from you, his voice changing to a more regular tone again, “I don’t ever want to be the reason you feel pain. Not after all those times you helped me escape mine.” He said, reaching out to hold your hand, as he referred to how you were there for him so long ago.
Pure concern and care for Hawk overtook you as the words left his lips, and you had never felt so conflicted in your life. It made sense to you now why he would often avoid you, whereas others he’d make it his mission to pick fights with.
He had just admitted to caring about you, and that he never wanted to be at fault for your hurt. He had a reputation to uphold, but he really did have a soft spot for you that never went away.
You felt like you were talking to Eli again, as though the sweet boy he once was had never left, but you also knew that once this moment was over, he’d go back to his corrupt ways again. And that terrified you.
All these new feelings for Hawk were rising in you, but how could you act on them when he was supposed to be your enemy?
He studied your expression, waiting for you to say something. He felt more confident now, seeing as you kissed him back, but he was still nervous for whatever you were about to say.
“What do we do?” You spoke shakily, your expression timid and lost. He caressed his thumb over your hand, noticing your own nerves. “What do you mean?” He asked, not expecting that to be your first question.
“I’ve always cared about you and you know that, but then you go through all these changes and become a total dick, and now you kiss me and tell me how you care too.” You say awkwardly, trying to point out the weirdness of the situation. “I’m confused, Hawk, and afraid. We can’t be together when everything about our lives will keep us apart.” You whimpered, scattering your eye contact.
His heart leapt at the mention of you two being together, but frowned once registering the context of the words. He suddenly felt guilty, seeing how distressed you were. Maybe he shouldn’t have done this, he thought.
But it was too late now, and as he released your hand to move forward and hold you, he never wanted to let go.
“I’m sorry.” He mumbled into your ear. He knew his recent actions since joining Cobra Kai weren’t exactly admirable-- he knew he should do better. But it was hard; and all he could muster right now, was an apology.
There was a lot to process in such a short moment of time, and you felt overwhelmed. You felt comforted and safe as he held you, but at the same time you felt wrong for feeling that way.
Maybe he was trying to do right by you, but would that be enough if he continued to act terribly when everyone else was around? You needed some time to think. “I should go.” You pulled away from his grasp, trying to be gentle even though your exit was abrupt.
“Oh,” he nodded, watching as you picked up your karate bag. “I just don’t want everyone at the dojo to worry.” You said, trying to rid the conversation of its tension.
He was trying to play it cool, but he was screaming on the inside, terrified that once you left you would never talk to him again. “Just promise you’ll fix that when you get home.” Referring to your still-slightly-messed-up face, he urged you, unable to refrain from making sure you took care of yourself.
You smiled sadly and nodded in response, feeling awkward about everything as you turned to walk back on your route towards the dojo. “And um,” You looked back at him once more. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.” You said, assuming he wouldn’t want his Cobra Kai friends to find out he had kissed a Miyagi-Do.
His heart broke when you said this-- you basically thought he was ashamed of you? In a way you were right, he didn’t want them to know. But the guilt that spread across his face at your words, showed how badly he wanted to tell everyone just how much he liked you.
Clearing his throat, he tried to pull himself together again. “Right, yeah. See you.” He said, and watched you for a moment as you walked away.
Getting back into his car, he fought the emotions threatening to spill out, and pushed them away as he headed home. He couldn’t stop thinking about his next move, and what would happen next time he saw you.
Obviously the first thing he would want to do is kiss you, and hold you, and touch you.. but he knew that instead he would likely end up being encouraged by his friends to attack you in some way.
He couldn’t just say, ‘back off guys, she’s cool, i like her now.’ because that would definitely earn him a beating and a seat at the rejects table. He had been fighting these feelings for so long because of this exact reason, and he was pissed at himself that he couldn’t have just kept it under control for longer.
It would have been easier for him, and you. Even you were worrying as you walked to practice about what you were going to do when you saw him again. Your friends may be more forgiving than Hawk’s, but you doubted they’d be particularly thrilled about any of this news.
They would surely tell you to be careful, not to trust him, that it was just a game to find a weakness in you. These doubts inflicted your mind constantly, and it sucked that you had to figure all of it out on your own.
You were a half-hour late to karate when you arrived, and luckily Sensei Larusso had the tools to heal the remaining injuries on your face. You explained what happened with Tory, but you didn’t tell them about Hawk.
Your classmates were angry, Sam especially, and you were too. But after everything, you knew nobody in Cobra Kai was really in their right mind. Tory was an out of control girl with aggression issues, and Hawk was constantly battling a feeling of pressure and pent-up rage.
The worst thing about being in Miyagi-Do, was knowing the right way to go, and knowing that the right way was going to be a long, slow, and difficult process. It was a waiting game at this point-- how many fights would it take for the Cobra Kai kids to realize that wasn’t what they needed to do?
How much pain would they all have to endure, to realize there were better ways to solve their problems? You had only hoped that Hawk taking this step towards you was a step in the right direction-- and that maybe the rest of the Cobras would soon follow.
But until then, it was a secret. And the next few times you saw Hawk were an extreme struggle for the both of you.
Each passing day that you’d make eye contact at school, you’d both immediately look away. Neither of you had spoken or even texted since the kiss, and you were both failing miserably at proper communication.
At first, you thought that maybe the whole thing had been a mistake, and maybe it should just be left alone. But recalling everything Hawk said to you that day, you couldn’t ignore how real it felt. You wanted to be with him, but you had no clue how to go about that.
You were waiting for Hawk to make the next move, but to Hawk-- the ball was in your court. You had left him there, with no definite answer on how you felt about it, and never got back to him since. It seemed to him like you wanted to forget about it, so when one of Moon’s parties rolled around that weekend, he decided to forget about it too.
You were coming to the party, but got there late; and what a wonderful sight it was for the first thing to see as you walk in be Hawk, face inches away from another girl’s, flirting the night away.
Of course, you thought, feeling disgusted at what was in front of you. Of course everything he said was bullshit. You couldn’t figure out for the life of you what his goal was in pretending to care for you, especially when he got basically nothing out of it except a stupid kiss he could’ve gotten from anyone-- but clearly none of it was as real as you thought it was.
It’d been a few days, sure, but you thought maybe tonight you’d finally just talk to him. You watched as the girl played with the string of Hawk’s hoodie, and feeling a pang of jealousy you decided to walk by them, making sure your presence was known.
It definitely worked, because at the notice of your movements he excused himself from the conversation and followed you out towards the pool, where you had gone to get away from the sight of Hawk and the girl.
“Hey.” He whispered, as you poured yourself a drink. “Hi.” You replied boredly with your back turned to him, not exactly feeling excited to have a conversation with him.
He looked around, scoping out who may be listening, but luckily the only others outside were heavily invested in the drinking game going on at the other side of the patio.
Hawk could tell you were bothered about the girl, but didn’t understand why, since you had so obviously been avoiding him.
“Can we talk?” He asked, still being cautious as to not attract any attention. “Go ahead.” You were being difficult, but quite frankly you thought he deserved it. He made you spend days analyzing what had happened between you, only for him to move on from it after a few days?
He stomped closer, and you looked up at him. “You know we can’t talk here.” He nodded his head towards the back of the yard, hoping you’d go with him somewhere private.
You scoffed, and looked at the spot doubtfully. You were upset, but still curious to hear what he had to say. “Fine.” You rolled your eyes, feeling disappointed in yourself for giving in, but you couldn’t pretend you weren’t dying to know what the hell he was thinking.
Hawk walked eagerly to the secluded part of Moon’s property, hoping to get some clarity from you. But before Hawk could say anything, your anger got the best of you.
“So what the hell is your problem?” You started, as soon as you knew you were out of earshot from the rest of the party. Hawk looked taken aback, his eyebrows immediately coming together. “Me? What are you talking about?” He said, offended.
You looked at him in disbelief, mouth dropping open slightly. “Are you joking? Are we going to pretend you weren’t just about to make out with that girl in there?” You said, feeling a twinge of hurt from your own words.
His face knotted in confusion and annoyance. “Seriously? You’re jealous right now? After I confessed everything to you, and you avoided me for days afterwards, I was just supposed to think you actually wanted me?” He tried to keep his voice down, but his emotions were getting the better of him.
“What? I just needed some time to think! It’s not like you bothered to text me either!” You whisper-shouted, now feeling like you were missing something.
“Well when you kiss someone and they basically run away from you, who’s responsibility do you think it is to reach out after?!” He threw his arms up in bafflement, looking at you expectantly.
Your face fell to a look of guilt, and eventually his did too. Suddenly you both felt like idiots at how far you jumped to conclusions.
“I was gonna talk to you today. But when I saw you in there with that girl, all these insecurities just came over me. I thought everything you said was just some Cobra prank and it never meant anything.” Your face drooped, feeling a little embarrassed to admit any of this.
His eyes saddened, and he shook his head. “And I just thought you hated me, and that no matter what I said it’d never be enough for you to forgive me.” He explained his own worry, and your eyes started to water at his words.
Feeling overwhelmed after finally being able to piece together what had been going on this whole time, you sprung into his arms, hugging him tightly. You both stayed embraced, enjoying the feeling of comfort from each other once again, until you finally felt strong enough to pull yourself away.
He kept a hand around your head, as though cradling something delicate. “I meant everything I said that day. It’s not a scheme. I want to be with you.” He told you, proving your suspicions wrong.
You smiled weakly, feeling warm at his confession, but nervous for what’s to come. “I’m sorry I never texted you, but I just don’t get how we’re going to do this.” You said, unconvinced. “We can’t tell anyone, and despite whatever we have, there are a lot more reasons why we won’t work than will.” You look away, your mood of happiness faltering at the idea of being realistic.
“I mean, you know I like you Hawk. And maybe it’s different for us, but, I can’t exactly support the way you treat other people.” You say reluctantly, trying not to sound rude. Hawk gulped, looking down shamefully.
Not wanting to think realistically right now, he ignored what you said and pulled you closer. “We’ll figure it out.” He said sweetly, and moved his hand to lift your chin, kissing you tenderly. As nervous as you were about all of it, the way he kissed you somehow seemed to make all your worries disappear.
Just then as your lips met, sirens went off nearby. “Shit, cops?” Hawk said, breaking apart from you. You giggled at the unfortunate turn of events. “You go that way,” you pointed him in the opposite direction of where you were planning to exit, not wanting others to notice you were together. “See you around.” You said playfully, and he caught on to your plan.
Before he could give you a final peck or even say goodbye, you were gone around the corner of the house, and he wondered longingly when he’d finally be able to kiss you again.
The next couple days at school you’d both done your best to avoid looking suspicious with each other. There were many stolen glances, and lots of private texts, but you both somehow managed to keep whatever fling you two had completely under wraps.
Though you had been initially uncomfortable with the whole secret-dating-thing, you eventually gave up on worrying about what would happen if others found out. You were happy, and having a lot of fun sneaking around with Hawk.
You noticed he had even toned down some of his bullying, and your heart felt full at the thought that he might have done that for you. Of course, there were always a few ‘slip-ups’.. but he made sure you weren’t around to see those.
Even if it was difficult, it was thrilling in a way-- having make-out sessions in his car when no one was around to see, and slipping in through each others’ windows at night to see each other...
It was fun, pretending to hate each other by day, and then not being able to stay away from each other by night. It felt like the whole school was being pranked, and you two were the only ones in on it.
It had been a few weeks now since you admitted to liking each other at Moon’s party, and you were now headed to the sports shed near the soccer field where Hawk had asked you to meet him after school.
You’d came here and gotten a little wild with him twice before, so at the invitation you fully expected to be met with an aggressive Hawk, ready to hook up. But instead when you opened the shed door, he was standing shyly and gave you the sweetest smile.
“Hey,” he said, taking a small step forward to meet where you were standing. “Hi, baby,” you grinned and kissed him chastely, taking note of the more innocent energy coming from him today.
He wrapped his arms around you, his eyes examining your face adoringly. “Um,” he said, radiating nervousness and backing up slightly. “What’s up?” You smiled at him curiously, taking his hands in yours.
After only a moment, he released his hands from your hold, and you suddenly felt concerned. Why was he acting so weird? You watched confusedly as he fiddled with the inside pocket of his jacket, not saying a word.
Pulling out a small box, he opened it to reveal a simple but beautiful silver necklace. “Hawk!” You gasped, looking at it in awe. He felt more confident at your reaction, and felt safe to say something again.
“I thought that, since we always have to act around each other, you could wear it as a reminder of how we really feel.” He said, searching your expression for some sort of approval.
You stared at him in admiration, not yet able to find the words to respond. “It’s simple, so nobody will think it means anything, but, we’ll know.” He spoke again, hoping for it to grant a response from you this time.
Your face began to bloom with happiness. Taking the box from his hands, you kissed him passionately. “I love it. Can you put it on me?” You asked cheerfully, and Hawk smiled brightly. “Yeah,” he nodded excitedly, turning you around.
You did your best to move your hair out of the way, and Hawk gently pushed the few stray strands to the side. Feeling his fingers brush across your skin, you breathed heavily. You could feel his own breath hot on your neck, as he clasped the two ends of the jewelry together.
With your back still against his torso, he placed his hands around your waist, starting to leave soft kisses against your ear, and down towards your collarbone.
You closed your eyes, soaking in the feeling, until the door of the shed barged open. You stumbled away from each other in shock, and looked to see Tory standing in front of the both of you.
“I knew it! What the hell is this, Hawk?” She screamed, prowling towards you. Feeling completely unprepared from the utter suddenness of the situation, you stepped back in fear. “What are you doing here!?” Hawk shouted, ignoring Tory’s question as he blocked her path from getting to you.
She sneered at the both of you, stopping as she noticed his protectiveness over you. “I’ve noticed how you sneak off at the end of school. I finally decided to follow you here.” She said matter-of-factly, giving you a glare.
“So what is she, Hawk? Your girlfriend?” She taunted, starting to circle you. Out of everything she’d said so far, that was the thing that actually made you the most nervous. You hadn’t actually used that word before... ‘girlfriend,’ you hadn’t really made it official, despite how much it felt like you already had.
You weren’t sure how Hawk would react now that he was caught, but you desperately hoped he would say, ‘Yes, she is, and I love her.’ But that was nowhere close, to what he said.
“What? No! We’re just having some fun, alright? It doesn’t mean anything.” He forced a laugh, stepping away from you. Your heart ached. This is what you were afraid of. You knew it was probably for the best for him to have said that, but you couldn’t ignore the hurt you felt when you heard him say it.
You wished he would’ve right then and there just admitted it, stood up for himself, and chosen you. He could’ve just told the truth, and left Cobra Kai, and been with you. But you weren’t enough. He had a reputation to uphold.
“Oh, really.” Tory scoffed, barely believing his lie as she looked between the two of you. “You can have fun with anyone, Hawk, and you a choose a Miyagi-Do?” She spat, staring him down, and his usually-confident demeanor diminished instantly. “Break it off, or I tell everyone.”
Storming off, her threat lingered in the air as the two of you stood alone, unable to meet each other’s gazes.
“Maybe we should just end this, Y/N.” Hawk spoke meekly, finally breaking the silence. Your eyes widened in horror, forcing yourself to look up at him. “What?” You said, your voice faltering. “So that’s just it then?”
Tears threatened to spill out of your eyes again as he met your stare. “We don’t have any other choice!” He shouted angrily, getting in your face. Your mouth fell agape at the way he was acting, your expression hardening.
“Yes, we DO!” You shouted back, and sobs started to escape you. You of course meant the choice being he stands up to the Cobras, and fights for your relationship. You understood his dilemma in the beginning, but at this point none of it seemed worth it to you anymore.
His eyes were fixated on you intensely, and his mind was running a mile a minute trying to figure out what to do.
“You can easily stand up to them, the Cobras! You’re stronger than all of them combined. Why won’t you fight for us?” You cried, searching for any sign in his face that showed he regretted his words. He had never said so, but you could tell the only thing holding him back was the fear of the Cobras’ reactions.
His insides scrambled with guilt watching you cry. But he had to stay strong. Unaffected, unfazed, completely unbothered. That’s how he forced his expression to appear as he turned and left the shed, leaving you alone and in pain as you watched your worst fear come true.
“Hawk!” You yelled after him, but he only kept walking. “What happened to never wanting to be the reason I felt pain?” Your voice cracked, and you wiped your tears from your face, giving up.
Your words cut into Hawk like a knife. If even possible, Hawk was hurting more than you. Each step he took farther away from where you stood, he felt his heart scatter into another piece. He wished things could be different, too-- but you were too much of a risk.
Cobra Kai may be a large reason for his troubles, but it was also the only reason he was still on top. He wanted you so bad, but he was too afraid to let go of everything else just to have you.
It was safer this way, he told himself. If nobody knew, you’d be safer. You wouldn’t have to be involved in the drama that would come from it, you wouldn’t have another reason for the Cobras to come after you, and you wouldn’t have to worry about him anymore.
Hawk repeated these things to himself over and over to make himself feel better about the way things ended. But no matter what he told himself, it was never enough for him to fully believe that he made the right choice.
Feeling helpless, you called the only person you thought might understand. “D-Demetri?” You spoke into the phone, taking a gasp for air between sobs.
“Y/N? Are you ok?” He answered, sounding worried. “I need to talk to you, can you-” You paused, trying to catch your breath. “Can you come get me?” You were nervous he wouldn’t be able to, but you needed someone in person, not over text.
You and Demetri weren’t particularly besties, so for you to call him out of the blue, crying, was extremely worrisome to him. “Uh, yeah, okay sure. I only just left so I can turn back.”
Letting out a shaky breath of relief, you thanked Demetri and hung up, walking out of the shed and towards the front of the school to where he would be meeting you. Hawk was supposed to be your ride home, but clearly that was no longer an option.
When Demetri arrived, he didn’t wait for you to get in the car, he immediately got out and walked over to you. “What happened?” He said cautiously, becoming nervous about having to deal with others’ emotions.
He was never particularly great at consolation, being the awkward and blunt person he is-- and he really didn’t want to make things worse for you.
“It’s Eli,” You said, trying to hold back your tears. “I did something really stupid.” Your lip quivered, feeling embarrassed talking about it. You weren’t supposed to tell anyone about you and Hawk, but at this point, you had nothing left to lose.
Demetri looked at you confused. “What do you mean?” To his knowledge, you and Hawk barely conversed, and there should be absolutely no reason whatsoever for you to be crying over him.
The closer you got to explaining it, the harder it got to contain your emotions. Despite knowing Demetri wasn’t very keen on hugs, you ran into him, desperate for the feeling of comfort.
At this point, Demetri’s level of concern was on the rise. Why on earth would you hug him? That’s never happened before. “I just thought you’d be the only one who would understand... if I told someone.” You spoke, words slightly muffled as you were pressed into his chest.
Reluctantly, Demetri accepted your hug and rested his arms around you. “Okay, Y/N, you’re scaring me. What did he do?” He asked, looking down at you.
Gaining the courage to explain yourself, to Demetri’s relief you let go of him and steadied your breathing. “A few weeks ago.. Hawk and I kissed.” You said hesitantly, preparing for the worst.
“What?” Demetri’s face scrunched into the most confused and offended look you’d ever seen him wear. “I know, okay, just wait.” You told him, hoping he would hear you out.
“I thought it was just a stupid mistake, or something?” You began, recalling the uncertainty you felt when it first happened. “But then he said all this stuff about how much he cared about me, and it turns out we actually have something real.”
Aware of the weirdness of what you were saying, you looked to see how Demetri was handling it. He showed a look of understanding, but you could tell he was simply masking the discomfort he was truly feeling. “It was really confusing at first, but then we started secretly dating.. because we knew everyone would flip if they found out.” You continued, the awkwardness worsening with each sentence spoken.
Demetri’s eyebrows rose. “Dating?” You visibly cringed at the reaction, but carried on with your story. “And he even started being nicer to people!” You mentioned, hoping to make the situation seem like you weren’t a complete idiot for allowing it to happen. “Because, I told him I didn’t think I could be with him-- with the way he treats people, you know? And things were actually going well until today--”
You took a moment, preparing the end of your explanation in the hopes you wouldn’t start to cry through it. Demetri looked at you impatiently.
“When Tory found us together and threatened to tell everyone about us if we didn’t break it off, and then Hawk just left me there and said that we should end things because he’s a coward and can’t do what’s right because HE WANTS TO LOOK COOL.” You shouted, running through the sentences fast and furiously. Instead of getting sad like you thought you would, you got angry. Ah yes, another stage of grief.
Demetri looked slightly scared of you at your sudden tantrum, but having heard your story, he did understand what you were feeling-- because in a way, it had happened to him too. This time, it was him who reached out to hug you, and you appreciated him for it. Hugs always seemed to make you feel calm.
“I’m sorry, Y/N. I know how it feels. He’s stuck right now, but we can’t give up, okay? He’ll come around.” He said honestly, awkwardly patting your back. You laughed a tiny bit, seeing Demetri trying to console, but you were grateful for his presence.
You released each other from the hug, and you wiped any leftover tears off of your face. “Thanks, Demetri.” You said, smiling sweetly. He nodded, placing his hand on your arm in reassurance, and motioned for you to follow to his car.
The ride back to your house was quiet, but your thoughts were busy and loud. That’s how things were for awhile after that day. You kept to yourself again, and though you tried to look alive, you felt like you had retreated back inside the bubble you worked so hard to get out of.
You went to school, you went to karate, you did whatever responsibilities you had to do-- but for the rest of your free time, you spent it alone in your room, wondering what it would take for Hawk to come back to you.
It was unhealthy, really, how you would wait everyday for a sign of acknowledgement from Hawk, and decline any other social invitation because you never got one.
You even wore the necklace, everyday, in hopes that he’d notice and remember how much you meant to him. But it never worked. He never came back.
You got away with the isolation for awhile, but people were starting to notice how you’ve been pulling away. At least you had Demetri to cover for you once and awhile, to help keep up the facade that you were okay.
Because, you weren’t. You wondered if Hawk was, though. He certainly seemed like he was okay, but he couldn’t be. For your own peace of mind, you had to think he couldn’t be. To think that he was doing just fine while you were spending your days miserable, wouldn’t be fair.
He’s stuck right now, but he’ll come around. Demetri’s words echoed in your head, wondering if they were even true. Would he ever really come around? Is he in too deep? The thoughts scared you beyond belief, but as more days passed, the more you believed them.
You eventually forced yourself to stop caring. To stop thinking about it, and to just give it up. You’d spent too long waiting for him, and you were done letting his actions control your happiness. Although there was a part of you that could never really stop caring, you convinced yourself that it was gone.
After a few weeks, you stopped wearing the necklace. When you showed up to school without it on, it was the first time Hawk had noticeably looked at you since the breakup. He always avoided your eye contact, but that day he locked them onto yours as you passed him in the hall. His gaze flickered from your eyes to your neck, and you could see the glum look all over his face.
As much as you wanted to give in to the hope that he missed you, you ignored it. You weren’t going to let any of those thoughts in again-- not when you already worked so hard to let go of them.
Hawk watched you make your way through the corridors, hardly caring who noticed. While you may have had the ability to attempt to move on, he didn’t. It was his fault any of this happened after all, and it was completely up to him whether or not he could fix things between you.
The pressure of knowing he was the only reason for your and his despair was agonizing, and with the necklace no longer around your neck, he realized he was running out of time.
Time is what he thought he had, to turn things around for himself, and you. But his window was closing, and he was panicking.
Not knowing what else to do, Hawk waited a few blocks away from where you trained at Miyagi-Do, knowing he’d catch you on your walk home.
Making your way down the sidewalk after practice, you were completely unsuspecting when Hawk jumped out of his car and jogged towards you.
Things had really come full circle now, hadn’t they? You, walking home on that same sidewalk, pure disgust for Hawk in your veins as he tried to catch up with you.
You stopped short as Hawk stood in front of you, blocking your path. You were nervous and confused at his intrusion, and decided not to bother avoiding him right now.
His stare towards you was intense, and you only glared back, waiting for him to say what he needed to say.
“You stopped wearing the necklace.” He said it so plainly, you couldn’t tell what kind of response he was looking for. It seemed almost like a question in disguise-- why did you stop wearing the necklace, perhaps?
He was looking at you eagerly, though trying to hide the desperation behind the statement.
“Yeah, and?” You laughed at him, matching his tone of carelessness. He looked like he didn’t understand, so you continued. “What’d you expect? That I’d just keep waiting for you?” You said unpleasantly, with a hint of sadness in your own voice.
A shameful look glossed over his features, but you only kept going. “It’s obvious you’re not coming back, Hawk.” You smile at him mockingly, enjoying the feeling of guilt you were giving him.
He tried to stay strong, but every word you spoke was like a hit to his built-up walls, and they were so close to falling down.
“I spent weeks wondering what I’d have to do to get you to come back to me. To choose me.” You said, your voice calm, but the rest of you not. Your body was shaking with anger now, but your eyes were brimming with tears.
“Until,” You sniffled, gaining a tone of indifference, “I finally realized there was nothing for me to do. You just weren’t coming.” You were almost smiling through the pain, and Hawk looked at you in a loss for words.
You appeared so fragile to him, he just wanted to wrap you in his arms and spout apology after apology for what he’d caused. Seeing your eyes squint in attempt to hold back the waterworks, physically pained him.
“So yeah, I stopped wearing the necklace. But you know what?” You stepped forward confidently, despite the single tear that had just fallen down your face. “I think it hurt more wearing it than it did taking it off.” You finished with hardly any emotion in your voice, and Hawk looked mortified seeing you try to act so unaffected.
He had been silent through your whole exchange, because he knew there was nothing he could say now to make things better. He had done too much damage, and he had caused you too much pain. He did exactly what he said he’d never do.
You waited for him to say something, anything-- but as your eyes bore into his strongly, he couldn’t find the courage to speak. The disappointment was immense, and feeling hopeless once again, you pushed past him to go home.
Panicking at your leave, Hawk grabbed onto your arm. “Y/N, Wait, please-” “No!” You cut him off, looking at him coldly. His face was red, and his eyes were stinging now, too. Ignoring the feeling you got when you saw him like that, you ripped your arm from his grasp. “I’ve waited long enough.”
You turned to leave again, and this time, Hawk didn’t follow. There was only one thing Hawk could do now to get you back, and you knew he wasn’t ready for it. There was no use in you hanging around for him anymore, you deserved better. You deserved someone who cared enough that they’d do what it takes to be with you, regardless of social status.
You didn’t even care if he stayed in Cobra Kai, you just wanted him to stand up to his friends and be proud that he was with you. Didn’t he realize that he was one of the strongest Cobras, and that he could get through any of their shit? If his biggest problem was Tory, he hardly had any reason to stay quiet. You knew deep down he could do better.
Hawk hadn’t understood that then, but as he lingered on you walking away, something clicked in his head.
Maybe he really could do better. He wanted to, for you. He was still terrified at the idea of coming clean to the Cobras, but whatever he’d deal with from that couldn’t be any worse than being without you.
He liked the power he had being in Cobra Kai, and he hoped that he could keep it-- but if losing the power meant gaining you, at this point he was totally okay with that risk. But, that didn’t mean he wouldn’t at least try to negotiate with his friends first.
“Y/N!” It was a new day at school, and you were walking side by side Sam heading to your lunch table when he called your name. You shared a look with Sam, glancing towards him with a bothered look upon your face. “Come here!” Hawk shouted again, apparently not caring that the whole cafeteria had his attention.
A look of dread spread across your face, and you slammed your lunch tray on your friends’ table in defeat before stomping over to where Hawk and his asshole friends sat. Your friends watched from afar, completely clueless as to what Hawk would need you for, and Demetri struggled to pretend he was just as lost as they were.
“What.” You said bluntly, staring him and the rest of his table down. “Yeah, seriously, what are you doing calling her over here?” Mitch asked, looking at you in revulsion, and you rolled your eyes at him.
Hawk looked between you and his friends, struggling to keep his confident manner in tact, and sighed uncomfortably. “I know we don’t like the Miyagi-Dos. And we don’t like the way they run their dojo.” He stated, hoping to hook his friends in by starting negatively towards their rivals.
His friends looked at him in reluctance, wondering where he was going with this-- and you did too. “But I love Y/N.” He said loudly, letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in, and looking around at his friends. He was more nervous to see your reaction than theirs, so he barely looked at you once he said it.
“What?” The words came strongly from not only his friends, but you, too. He had never told you that before, and your heart melted at his declaration. When you spoke, he gathered the courage to look at you, and you’d never seen him so nervous.
“I love you.” He repeated, looking you in the eyes. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing, and on top of that he was announcing it to the whole school. You glanced over to see Demetri, mouth ajar, observing the interaction like it were a movie.
He meant it, and you could tell. He was waiting on you for a response, feeling more stress than he’d felt in a long time as he studied your bewildered expression.
Before you could say anything, Bert interrupted the moment. “You can’t love a Miyagi-Do. They’re stuck-up pansies who think they’re better than us.” He said, completely convinced that Hawk was out of his mind and needed a wake-up call.
Hawk cringed a little at the feedback, but was surprised when you decided to bite back. “I joined Miyagi-Do because I was tired of people getting bullied. You all choose violence when it isn’t needed, so I just wanted to be prepared.” You defended your intentions, fearlessly.
Tory snorted. “Oh yeah? And how’s that working out for you?” She jabbed, trying to make fun of your self defense skills. Before you could retort, Hawk slammed his hand down on the table and leaned in towards his peers.
“Listen! I’m with you guys, but she’s right. We’ve been reckless.” He said carefully, trying to keep a balance between who’s side he was on. “Sensei told us to fight smart, and we haven’t been.” He locked eyes with Tory, clearly sending her a message.
You watched as Hawk tried to reason with them, admiring his every move. Keeping up his confidence, he set down what was going to happen, and there’d be no arguments against it. “You guys can hate the Miyagi-Dos all you want, but I’m going to be with Y/N, and I’m staying in Cobra Kai.”
Interlacing his hand with yours, he looked at you pridefully before turning back to the outraged looks on his friends’ faces. “From now on, if any one of you touches her, you deal with me. That’s of course if she doesn’t kick your ass first.” He said smugly, and you smiled widely, feeling content at his speech.
Your heart was jumping out of your chest at the gesture he made, and you wanted to smash your lips onto his and tell him how much you loved him back-- but you kept yourself restrained for the sake of the situation.
Most of the Cobras nodded nervously at his announcement, not wanting to challenge Hawk when he was so sure of himself. But Tory wasn’t having it. “You guys can’t seriously be okay with this?” She snapped, death-glaring the entire table.
The group looked like they were trying to decide whether they were more afraid of Hawk, or Tory. You smiled to yourself, knowing that no matter their reaction, you had won this, because you were with him now. It would certainly be a bonus if you gained their acceptance, though.
Mitch looked around in uncertainty about what he was going to say, but stuck up for Hawk. “Come on Tory, I mean, I get it... she’s hot.” He said referring to you, and you laughed a little at the shallow but positive response.
Hawk wasn’t as pleased with it though. “Hey.” He threatened, pointing a finger at Mitch. You giggled slightly at his jealous reaction, but pulled him back from Mitch by the hand you were holding his with. Mitch raised his hands in surrender, and Tory stood from the table, getting close to the both of you.
“You’d better sleep with one eye open, assholes.” She spat, and stormed away from the table. It went better than you would’ve thought, truthfully. Everyone else was loyal to Hawk, and you didn’t really expect anything less from Tory. Again, having Tory be your only threat seemed like small potatoes now that you two were together.
You nodded at the rest of the Cobras in respect, and with that whole thing being over, you tugged him by the hand towards your table of Miyagi-Dos. Hawk groaned, realizing where you were taking him, but did his best to stay civil.
Chris glowered at the both of you, and Sam looked a little disappointed, but she tried to look supportive. “So.... yeah. Sorry.” You said sheepishly, knowing that they had already heard everything.
“I’m glad it finally worked out.” Demetri said through a sad smile. You felt a little bad, knowing that Demetri still needed to work out his relationship with Hawk, and here you were rubbing yours in his face. That would be your next mission, you suppose-- operation get Demetri and Hawk to be friends again.
“Thanks, Dem.” You said appreciatively, and Hawk looked suspiciously between the two of you. “Wait, did you tell him before?” He asked defensively. The whole table looked to you and Demetri curiously, and you crossed your arms sassily.
“Uh, did I call someone to come get me after you left me alone in a shed? Yeah.” You recovered, your facial expression sly as you knew he couldn’t come back from that one. The others looked at him exasperatedly at your response, and his face dropped instantly.
“Oh my god, Y/N I am so sorry about that.” He cowered, immediately dropping it, and you laughed at the remorse he was finally showing. You already knew he was sorry, but you guess it was nice to hear him say it.
He didn’t understand why you were laughing, though. He felt awful. And he also really needed a chance to completely apologize to you in private, now that he had already confessed his true feelings.
Suddenly, he picked you up entirely, arms holding your legs and you wrapped your arms around his neck instinctively. “Whoah, what is happening?” You laughed, looking at your friends who all looked just as puzzled as you.
Without saying anything else, he took off out of the lunch room carrying you, and made his way to the nearest exit to the outdoors. “Babe, where are we going?” You cackled, amused at the adventure he was taking you on.
Finally outside and alone, he let you down gently in front of him, and took your hands in his lightly. “I’m so sorry. For all of it. I was a complete idiot for letting you go. You knew all along that we could do it, and I was too busy being a pussy to even try. And I’m really sorry for everything that went down today, I hope you aren’t mad, I literally told you I loved you in front of everyone and that must’ve been awkward, I mean you didn’t even get to respond, which, now that I think about it maybe you didn’t want to, or--”
You silenced his rambling with a forceful kiss, grabbing the sides of his face with your hands. “I love you too, Hawk.” You said, pulling away from the kiss quickly, to give him the response he had been looking for.
He smiled big in return, and it turned your insides to mush. “You know, I realized we never got the chance to make things official.” He looked up at you cutely and you smiled back, knowing what was coming.
“So, will you be my girlfriend?” He asked charmingly, his face mere inches from yours. Blushing furiously, you nodded as you touched your forehead to his. “Mhm,” You said in agreement, grinning.
He took a moment, just admiring the look of you so happy, and with his manner still playful, he reminded you of something you had said before. “See? I came back to you.” He said proudly.
You looked at him lovingly, feeling a little emotional at the sentiment. His expression turned serious now, and he parted from you only slightly. “I’m gonna do better for you, Y/N. I promise.” He spoke lowly, and you put your hands on his shoulders, beaming at him in acknowledgement.
You stepped forwards again, getting closer to him. He gave a seductive smirk at your movement, and you subconsciously traced your fingers along his neck, fixated on his face more than anything.
Hawk stared back at you affectionately, his attention flickering down towards your lips. Feeling bold, he placed his hands dangerously low on your waist, and pulled you in roughly for another kiss. You quickly reacted, letting your hands travel to the nape of his neck, your mouth opening slightly-- allowing Hawk the opportunity to deepen the kiss.
Your lips stayed connected as Hawk’s hands made their way up your back, his chest pressing closer to yours. As much as you wanted to continue, you were in broad daylight right outside the halls of your school-- and you really didn’t want a detention for too much PDA.
“Mm, Hawk-” You giggled, breaking away from him. “Hm?” He smiled, his hands resting loosely on your waist as he pecked your lips again before letting you free. “If we don’t go back in soon we’ll miss the whole lunch period.” You said, disappointedly.
“Eh, that’s fine with me.” He shrugged, smirking at you as he clutched you closer. You scoffed playfully, hitting him lightly, and gave him one last kiss before escaping his grip.
He pouted at you, and you looked back at him mischievously. He missed your touch already, so he snaked his arm around your waist as you walked back inside to satisfy his need of holding you.
You felt on top of the world with him by your side, now having full confidence in him and his feelings for you. “It’s a good thing I still have the necklace, huh?” You teased, looking back up at him, and Hawk smiled, tilting his head to meet your gaze.
Though your comment may have only been a joke, both of you felt whole at the idea of you wearing the necklace-- and as you walked joyfully through the halls with him, you knew you’d never be taking it off again.
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i just wanna talk about real quick how much i cringe when writing like its actually terrible how much i cringe at myself so idk if i’ll keep doing fics or not HAHAH but y’all can always send requests and i’ll get around to them if i can. hope yall liked this one tho and made it through the whole thing cuz yikes.
#cobra kai#eli moskowitz#eli hawk moskowitz#hawk#jacob bertrand#eli hawk moskowitz cobra kai#eli moskowitz cobra kai#hawk moskowitz#hawk cobra kai#cobra kai hawk#hawk moskowitz cobra kai#eli moskowitz imagine#hawk imagine#eli hawk moskowitz imagine
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original request: @bakugousmymassa Hi willow🥺❤️❤️ ok so this has been on my mind for so long and I hope it makes sense. Ok so bakugou x fem reader and like yk she’s simping for him through manga/anime little does she know he’s doing the same thing is his world. And like they start thinking about each other and it comes through in the manga/anime and like they somehow find a way to communicate through it and like their love/simping becomes so strong that she randomly pops up in the common room and the bakusquad/class 1a is like 👁👄👁 and like they kiss or whatever Ik it’s long and weird but like omg I can’t get it out my mind sorryyy😭😭
pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x fem! reader
warnings: some swear words
genre: fluff, a bit angsty
a/n: thank you so much for the request bb! i added my own twist to it so i hope you like it!!
finally done with all my inbox requests!! 99% of them were bakugou in which i had zero complaints. i am here for all your bakugou needs 🤩i got a bit carried away with writing this so that’s why im letting it have it’s own moment☺️ i loved writing this and i would love to hear your thoughts on it (reblogs are greatly appreciated too🧡) enjoy xx
•
It was your favorite bookstore. It was where you bought your first manga. It was where you found a love for all these complex characters and incredible storylines. This bookstore seemed to satisfy every craving you had in regards to a 2D boy to fawn over. So there was no surprise that when you strolled into the bookstore, you headed straight to where the My Hero Academia mangas were.
You had read them all, even watched the anime. For some reason, you just kept coming back. You couldn’t get enough.
Something on the bookshelf had caught your attention. Among the original mangas, there was one lone book, different from the rest. You stared at the cover. It had your favorite character on it, keeping you intrigued. You had never seen this one before. Was it a side story? Was it a new release? If so, why would there only be one? Out of your own curiosity, you decided to buy it.
You handed the bookstore cashier the manga and your money. They looked at you, simply smiling.
“Is Katsuki Bakugou your favorite?” they asked.
“Yeah, he is,” you smiled. They handed you the book.
“Unfortunately there are no returns on this special edition. I guess you’ll be stuck with him,” they said. You chuckled, taking their comment as a joke.
“I’m okay with that.”
~
Once you were home, you sat down on your couch and pulled out the book, opening it up.
“What the…”
The pages were blank. The entire book had nothing in it. No words, no drawings, just plain white paper.
“How can you sell an empty book?” you groaned. You thought you had wasted your money on this. You set the book down, staring at the blank page angrily.
Suddenly, one spot of ink appeared on the page. Then more. Your eyes grew as the pages created their own drawing in the corner.
“This isn’t happening…”
You stared at the drawing, stunned.
“What kind of idiot buys a book before opening it first,” read the text bumble. On the page was a drawing of Katsuki Bakugou, his arms crossed with his classic smirk.
“H-How did you just…”
Another drawing began to appear next to the original.
“What? Never seen a self-drawing manga before? Come on dumbass, keep up with me here.”
You couldn’t believe your eyes. Bakugou was talking to you, through a manga.
“B-But you’re not real… you’re just a drawing…”
“Sure I’m a drawing right now, just as you are a drawing on my end. Doesn’t make me or you any less real.”
“Why are you talking to me… how did you find me?”
“Well, how did you find out about me?”
“I read about you in my mangas and I watch your show…”
“Then there is your answer gorgeous. I do the same.”
“I’M A CHARACTER IN A MANGA?” Your brain couldn’t seem to process everything that was happening.
“Of course you are. Damn, you aren’t the brightest…”
“B-But then how did I get your book? Anyone could have bought it.”
“Well me and Shitty Hair figured out a way to leave something behind for you. So that’s how you can talk to me through the book,” explained Bakugou.
“This isn’t happening...this is a lot to process right now. You’re like my dream guy but you’re supposed to be fictional and I’m not entirely sure what to do with all this new information,” you sighed.
“I can explain better in person.”
“I’m sorry, what-”
“Go grab a pen.”
“Bakugou-”
“Go grab a pen Y/N.”
You did as you were told, grabbing the nearest pen.
“Okay now what?”
“Go to a new page and draw yourself, like how I am,” Bakugou instructed. You were skeptical but did it anyway. You created a small box and drew yourself, resembling a manga panel.
“Now write your location as ‘in the common area’.”
“This has to be some kind of fever dream…”
“Just do it dumbass.”
You carefully wrote your desired location.
“Okay now what?”
“I’ll see you later dumbass,” smirked Bakugou. Your eyes grew.
“What- no you can’t just leave-”
“Bye nerd.”
No new panel appeared. You sighed, still in shock.
“There’s no way that was real…”
You set the manga down and laid on your back. You felt a wave of exhaustion come over you. You yawned, slowly falling asleep.
~
“Be quiet, you’re gonna wake her up!”
“How did she even get here?”
“Do you think Bakugou would be mad if I asked her out?”
“It’s not like she would say yes…”
“HEY-”
“Shit I think she’s awake....”
You felt groggy. As if you had been sleeping for days. You slowly started to open your eyes. People-like figures hovered around you.
“Back up, give her some space…”
You sat up, rubbing your eyes. The room was bright. The yellow-tinted walls and green floor caught your attention.
“Where am I…”
“UA High! A prestigious academy made for creating the world’s best Heroes!”
“Wait… Iida?”
“Correct!”
You soon realized what had happened. You looked around to all the familiar faces.
“Iida, Deku, Jirou, Kaminari, Momo, Mina, Kirishima, Todoroki…”
“Damn you’re good!” smiled Denki. You couldn’t believe it. You had some how made your way into your favorite story.
“Am I in the anime?”
“What anime?” asked Todoroki.
“Our anime! Or manga whichever you prefer!” smiled Deku.
“This has to be a dream, right?”
“How? You just woke up?”
“Todoroki it was a rhetorical question…”
“Oh…”
“Um where is Bakugou?” You asked. Everyone smiled.
“He’s waiting outside. You can go meet him,” explained Kirishima. You gulped. It’s not every day you get to come face to face with your fictional crush. Well, not so fictional now.
“Uh okay…” You stood up from the couch, beginning to make your way out the door. Taking a deep breath, you opened the door.
Bakugou was sitting on the steps of the dorms. His heart was beating out of his chest, though he wouldn’t admit it. He twiddled his thumbs as he waited for you to show up.
“H-Hey…” you whispered. Bakugou perked up, immediately standing up and turning around to face you. He looked at you with widened eyes. The both of you just stared at each other for a bit, fathoming the idea that you were really there. Seeing him on a screen or on a page was nothing compared to seeing him in real life.
“Damn…” he mumbled.
“What?”
“You’re beautiful.”
Even though this was technically your first meeting, the two of you weren’t strangers. You knew everything about each other. The endless admiration through pages seemed to have led you here. Exactly where you were supposed to be.
“How is this even real?” You questioned. Bakugou chuckled.
“You do realize your world isn’t the only one out there. So I had to take you to mine.”
“So I’m like a character you read about?”
“Yeah, just as I am that to you. I read your story just as you read mine. It’s not that complicated.”
“Why me though?”
Bakugou took a step towards you. He smiled, taking your hand.
“Why wouldn’t I take the opportunity to meet someone I’ve always dreamed about?”
Your face got hot as you tried to hold back your smile. You squeezed his hand.
“I’m glad you did.”
“Then let’s go dumbass,” he said. You raised a brow.
“What?”
“Well we have to write the rest of the book, don’t we? Come on, I’ve only got you for 300 more pages,” He explained.
“Wait there’s a limit on this?”
“Don’t worry about that now. Now come on, we’ve got shit to do.”
~
You and Bakugou spent the entire day together. He showed you around Musutafu, introducing you to all his favorite places. He showed you his favorite places to train, his favorite restaurant, where he likes to buy his mangas, and even where he found the book that brought you here.
You couldn’t help but take mental notes while you were with him. His hair was a lot softer than you imagined, and he actually did smell of sweet caramel. His red eyes weren’t intimidating at all, actually, you found them adorable. Bakugou had little patience, which you figured correctly. As you held his hand, he would mumble soft ‘sorry’s’, afraid that his hands were getting sweaty. You reassured him that he was fine. That caused his cheeks to blush.
The two of you sat at a park bench, enjoying the view of the city before you. Your head was rested on his shoulder as you held onto his arm. You couldn’t believe this was real. The boy you spent ages crushing over through a screen actually felt exactly the same. It was better than words.
“I wish there were fireworks,” you said. Bakugou chuckled. He removed his arm from your grip.
“Here. How’s this?”
Bakugou started to create mini-explosions in the palms of his hands, resembling fireworks. You stared at the beautiful sparks. Your smile was contagious. You looked up at him but he was already looking at you. You felt your face turn hot.
“So how many more pages until I’m allowed to kiss you?” blurted out Bakugou. You flinched. The burning in your cheeks grew stronger. You smiled.
“None.”
You grabbed the collar of Bakugou’s shirt and pulled him towards you. You crashed your lips together. He gently cupped your face as he held you close. The way he kissed you was beyond anything you could have ever imagined. His heart was beating out of his chest too. He was looking forward to seeing you in person just as much as you were, maybe more.
You looked at Bakugou. His face flushed pink, a cheeky smile from ear to ear. He wrapped his arm around you.
“Wait I have something for you,” you remembered, “I don’t really know how these work but I thought you could use it too.”
You had handed Bakugou a book, similar to the one he had left for you.
“I just think we deserve another volume,” you grinned. Bakugou kissed the top of your head, taking the book.
“I think so too.”
~
You woke up to the sound of your phone ringing. You stretched and rubbed your eyes. Then you remembered.
“Was I really there?” you mumbled. You tried to orient yourself, still slowly waking up. You reached for the manga that sat on the other side of your couch. You took a deep breath opening it up.
The pages were no longer blank. They instead were filled with perfectly detailed drawings of you and Katsuki Bakugou, following the storyline you had just experienced. You wiped the stray tear from your eye and brought the book to your chest.
“Until next time, Katsuki Bakugou.”
•
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