#this actually inspired me to draw some stuff

[fairytales-and-folklore]

Some Things Should Really Just Stay In The Vault

Teen Wolf » Sterek

Title: Some Things Should Really Just Stay In The Vault

Author: fairytalesandfolklore

Fandom: Teen Wolf (Masterlist)

Relationship: Derek Hale x Stiles Stilinski

AO3 Rating: Teen & Up (a complete collection of author's notes, inspiration credits, content warnings and tags can be found on AO3)

Summary: "Stiles, you are not breaking into the secret Disney porn vault," Derek heaves a long-suffering sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose and rolling his eyes so hard he nearly gives himself a migraine. "That's not a sentence I ever thought I'd have to say, but here we are. This is my life now."

"Oh come on, sourwolf," Stiles snickers. "You can't tell me you aren't at least a little bit curious." "There isn't enough brain bleach in the world to scour the mental image of Mickey and Goofy doing the horizontal tango," Derek quips, a self-satisfied smirk twitching at the corners of his lips as Stiles barks out a laugh and settles back into the passenger seat. A few minutes tick by in companionable silence, and then Stiles is bolting upright, glancing over at Derek with a look of feigned innocence betrayed by the mischievous glint in his eye. "So…" he ventures with an air of casual nonchalance that fools absolutely no one. "You think they keep this vault on the premises, or—"

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"—and we have to ride Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run because, I mean, obviously. If I have the chance to pretend to be Han Solo for even a couple of minutes, I'm gonna take it. Except — oh shit — I might not actually get to be the pilot first time around, since the roles are assigned based on your position in line in a group of six, so we might have to ride it a couple of times, just to be safe," Stiles chatters away from the passenger seat, eyes glued to a never-ending scroll of article after review after shoddy instagram video as he regales a begrudgingly fond Derek with details about every single game, ride, and food court in the newly-minted Star Wars theme park.

Derek had been planning this surprise birthday trip for months now, ever since Disney had announced the date of the grand opening. He'd managed to keep it a secret from Stiles all of five minutes, until the snarky little shit had snuck up behind him for a tackle hug, saw him ordering the tickets, and screeched at a decibel only dogs should be able to hear. And though Derek isn't nearly as big of a fan as Stiles is, he has to admit that some of the attractions sound pretty cool (though he'll be pointedly avoiding the blue milk, thanks.)

Stiles is off on another tangent about how blue milk apparently tastes like a cross between coconut rice milk and a fruity hi-chew (and Derek thought butterbeer was too sweet) when he lets out a burst of laughter so sharp and sudden that Derek nearly swerves into oncoming traffic.

"I'm sorry," Stiles gasps in between peals of laughter. "I'm so sorry, dude, it's just— I just found out some absolutely golden dirty Disney secrets."

"Oh?" Derek prompts with a raised eyebrow, leaning over to glance at the post pulled up on Stiles's phone.

"Okay, so," Stiles starts, straightening up in his seat and launching into researcher mode. "According to the accounts of some of their former employees, Disney's got this weird rule in their artists' contracts — essentially, everything they create while under their employ, even in their off-time, belongs to Disney."

"That's shitty," Derek scoffs, lips twisting into a sour expression.

"It is," Stiles agrees with a quick nod. "But joke's on them, because apparently, a lot of the artists ended up drawing some pretty NSFW stuff in their time — all of it done in the classic animation style of the movies and tv shows they were actively working on at the time."

"Everything?" Derek asks with a scandalized quirk of his eyebrows. "Even—"

"Snow White? Aladdin? Treasure Planet? Little Mermaid? Beauty and the Beast? Mickey? Goofy? Yup, I'm afraid so. You name it, there's a high likelihood there's porn of it," Stiles confirms, ticking each one off on his fingers and casting Derek a sympathetic frown as his face pulls into an expression like he's just sucked a lemon.

"But get this," Stiles barrels on, unable to contain his glee. "Per their policies, they've got to keep every piece of art ever crafted by their animators. Which means that Disney owns an entire collection of erotic artwork inspired by all the family-friendly content they've ever created, locked away in a secret vault. A vault, Derek. Think about that. Think about how much porn would have to be created to fill an entire vault."

"I'd really rather not," Derek grimaces.

"Oh come on, sourwolf, that's fucking hilarious," Stiles snickers. "You can't tell me you aren't at least a little bit curious."

"There isn't enough brain bleach in the world to scour the mental image of Mickey and Goofy doing the horizontal tango," Derek quips with a sardonic sigh, a self-satisfied little smirk twitching at the corners of his lips as Stiles barks out a laugh and flashes him a dazzling smile.

With a contented hum, Stiles settles back into the passenger seat and leans his head against the window to marvel at the rolling landscape, sunlight and city skylines mirrored in his eyes.

But of course, the nice peaceful moment doesn't last long. A few minutes tick by in companionable silence, and then Stiles is bolting upright, glancing over at Derek with a look of feigned innocence betrayed by the mischievous glint in his eye.

"So…" he ventures with an air of casual nonchalance that fools absolutely no one. "You think they keep this vault on the premises, or—"

"Stiles, no."

"Stiles, yes."

"Stiles, you are not breaking into the secret Disney porn vault," Derek heaves a long-suffering sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose and rolling his eyes so hard he nearly gives himself a migraine. "That's not a sentence I ever thought I'd have to say, but here we are. This is my life now."

"Oh come on, Derek," Stiles whines, tugging at his shirtsleeve. "I'm not saying you'd have to break in with me. Just, you know…be the lookout."

"No."

"You'd go down in history as the best boyfriend ever," he coaxes in a lilting, sing-song voice.

Derek raises one very unamused eyebrow in Stiles's direction.

"Okay, yes, obviously you already are," Stiles amends, flailing his arms in a dismissive motion. "But come on. A smutty Disney heist? Best. Birthday. Present. Ever."

"I am literally already taking you to Disneyland."

"Yes, but—"

"No porn vault," Derek asserts with a ringing finality.

"Fine," Stiles concedes with a theatrical groan, slumping down in his seat and admitting defeat. But then a wicked smile curls across his face as he recalls one wild, wolfsbane-infused round of Fuck, Marry, Kill where Erica had gotten Derek to admit to a long-time crush on a certain smoldering Disney prince, and breaks out his wildcard.

"Shame, though…" Stiles muses with a melodramatic sigh. "I'll bet they've got art of Flynn Rider."

Derek's knuckles whiten against the steering wheel, the tips of his ears tinged with a delicate shade of pink as he has war flashbacks, remembering all the devastatingly embarrassing details of that night. Moral of the story: never drink tequila.

The cabin of the Camaro is quiet for a few long moments, save for the gentle whoosh as cars pass them on the freeway, and then—

"…his name is Eugene, and I'm not saying I'll do it," Derek grumbles, but one look at Stiles's Cheshire Cat smile has him sighing in defeat.

And that's how they end up with a lifetime ban from the happiest place on earth, escorted off the premises by two burly security officers who merely laugh when Stiles asks if he can double back to collect their special edition Han and Leia themed Mickey ears hats, which he'd accidentally left on the floor of the not-so-secret porn vault. Derek has to physically carry Stiles back to the car, because no less than five minutes after they'd been given the boot, he's already got one foot in the fence and a half-cocked plan to break in and get them back.

[aniimoni]

🎂

oh mygoshshdhoh toghsohmtgosh I AM SO HONORED????? KRAB TJIS KS SO BEAUTIFUL SO WONDER IM SO HAPPY ITS IN MY INBOX HELLOOOOOOOO

[viarayy01-blog]

just waiting for it all to get better!!!!

[sergle]

was trying to find inspiration / concept art of robits and androids and maybe body horror w wires and shit but i kept finding exclusively just Robot Girl Art with the rcdart captain america body proportions

these are the same picture. also just a bunch of AI bloat clogging up my search results lol

[gonchillunchis]

ancient josuyasu doodle (circa 536 a.d)

[amphibianaday]

day 1548 and day 5 of amphibiuary

prompt list

[emathyst9]

Finally got it to a good screenshotting point I didn't think I'd get this far this quick on this piece but well I did

I'm just not too happy with the background color but I'll figure out that and the lighting so here's your preview of them for now

[triglycercule]

oh yeah before i forget cute mttpoly headcanon because i said so: when killer finds out (through SOME way of means. he has his ways) that dust and horror like something then at every chance he can he goes and finds that thing for them :3 because I SAID SO AND IT'S CUTE ‼️‼️ (something something killer has no idea how to properly show affection and appreciation after believing his whole life was meant to cause pain and suffering to those close to him and now that he's trying he does silly goofy stuff like this hehe,,,,,,, dust is DROWNING in piles of fluffy blankets and books. horror cannot keep up with eating the amount of snacks killer keeps stealing for him 😞😞😞)

[cirqyt]

2020 / 10 / 31

missed the holiday 4 years in a row

[seaofreverie]

Sparkstember Day 20: Hello Young Lovers

As much as I love Hello Young Lovers and it's everything to me, one essay about it is probably enough anyway. So enjoy some bunnies today and look out for more of the usual stuff tomorrow because I have very many feelings about Exotic Creatures.

[a-s-levynn]

This is Florence. He likes flowers.

[good-beans]

Misc 0312 art no one asked for but it's be annoying about sona time!!!

< Obligatory "I should have been there" art -- no shade on Amane, the line just drove the point home very well. I found this translation in a youtube video and like it better than the one on the wiki

> Old and new sketches, meme to explain how their symbolism pairs, and bonus 02-06! I had a cute one saying that "can I try rizzing you up/please please please" to Mappi but my art app ate it :(((( Please just imagine it in beautiful hilarious detail ty 🙏

Aaand one super extra cringe one but I've come this far already

[evilmagician430]

mabeline/jonah wolf in my 2020s timeskip au! read my tags for more information about her

[maareyas]

every time i go to bed and start thinking about where I am in terms of Art in general I have to mentally summon this image

[r0semultiverse]

What We Do in the Land of Ooo

🧛‍♂️ What We Do in the Shadows x Adventure Time crossover AU! ⚔

Finn Mertens in place of Guillermo de la Cruz

Marceline Abadeer in place of Nadja of Antipaxos

Bonnibel Bubblegum in place of Laszlo Cravensworth

Jake the dog in place of Colin Robinson

Vampire King in place of Nandor The Relentless

Betty Grof in place of The Guide

The Lich in place of Baron Afanas

Peppermint Butler in place of Wallace the Necromacer

Simon Petrikov in place of Derek

BMO in place of Nadja Doll (her old consciousness uploaded or something was an idea I had)

Marshall Lee & Gary Gumball/Prince in place of Sean & Charmaine

[harbingersecho]

out of bounds