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street-smarts00 · 3 years ago

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Eavesdropping

Midoriya x f!reader

Summary: Y/n had just realized that she has a crush on her best friend, Izuku Midoriya. She confides in Mina while they were walking to class. However, someone just so happens to overhear their conversation.

Word count: 1.9k

Fluff with ⚠️language

This is my first time writing, enjoy!

“I still can’t believe it took you that long to realize it,” Mina joked.

Mina had once again brought up this embarrassing topic. God forbid you mention anything about crushes, it’s all she wants to talk about. But then again you are a bit of a gossip too, you just didn’t like when the topic of conversation was yourself.

“I've been single for the past 16 years, you really expect me to know how my feelings work,” you mumbled while the two of you walked to heroics.

It was exhausting talking about your new found feelings for one of your best friends, Izuku Midoriya. The two of you have known each other for over a year now and had just started second year; and only a few days ago did you realize that you had fallen head over heels for the guy.

“So when are you gonna tell him?” Mina smirked. “What? Mina I can’t tell him that I like him it will ruin our friendship” you replied as your cheeks turned pink.

“Why do you think it’s gonna ruin your friendship?”

You sighed, “Because it’s gonna make everything awkward. I won’t know how to act around him once he knows and it’s not like he likes me back.”

Your friendship with Midoriya was more important than some silly crush. He was always there for you, giving you tips on how to improve your quirk or fighting style, helping you study, and whenever you were in a shitty mood he always knew what to do to lift your spirits.

“Oh please that’s a load of bull shit”

“MINA!” You exclaimed.

“What? You really think he doesn’t like you? You guys are super cuddly and touchy and you two always have to be touching whether your holding hands or your arms are linked.” Mina explained.

You shook your head, “No Mina that doesn’t mean he likes me, he’s just a touchy person,”

She smirked, “oh really, well I’m friends with him and he isn’t cuddly with me. Or even some of his other best friends, like Iida or Ochako, has he ever cuddled with them during movie night?”

You opened your mouth to respond but no words came out. She was right. You thought that he was just a touchy person. You had never noticed that the only person he was physically affectionate with,was you. The constant hand holding, and arms linked or draped across the others shoulders, the cuddling on the couch during movie night. It was only you, no one else.

“And, it’s not just the physical affection, he also goes out of his way to help you, like all the time. More so then the rest of the class. And remember when you sprained your ankle during training a few weeks ago, he freaked out and offered to carry you to recovery girls office, and when you did get there he refused to leave until you were all patched up”

You were speechless. You thought all of that stuff was just his normal helpful personality. He’s always trying to help others. Did he really give you more attention?

“Holy shit,” you whispered. Your heart was beating a mile a minute. It felt like you were frozen in place even though we’re you still walking to heroics.

“Awww now you have to tell him! Come on it will be so cute. You’ll confess your feelings, you’ll start dating and then you’ll be in love, and then soon I’m gonna have to start calling you y/n Midoriya.” Mina giggled.

“Mina!” You hissed, and she replied giggling.

In the middle of your rage, you didn’t notice Shinsou pass by the both of you.

“Hey Shinsou!” Mina said cheered. You looked up and mumbled “hey.” He glanced over looking exhausted as always and replied “Hey guys.”

He walked passed the two of you and always out of your line of sight. However, right afterwards you heard him say “Hey Midoriya”

Wait what?

Did he just say? Nope he didn’t, he did not just say Midoriya. He did not just say the name of the boy you and Mina had an ENTIRE conversation about.

It felt like the world was spinning. Your hands became sweaty and you almost dropped the case with your hero outfit.

You glanced towards Mina and she had the same expression as you, eyes wide, jaw dropped and face pale. The two of you turned our heads and unfortunately there he was. Your best friend, green messy hair, worn out old red shoes, and an almost identical facial expression as you. Except instead of all the color draining from his face, it turned bright red.

He awkwardly smiled and waved his trembling hand. You reverted your head and stared at the floor; you couldn’t look anyone in the eyes.

How long was he behind you? How much did he hear? You didn’t want to ask, you were too mortified to find out.

In your grief you didn’t realize that you had reached the girls locker room. You and Mina quickly ran inside and you sighed the tiniest bit of relief now that Midoriya was gone.

——————————————————————

Heroics class was starting and you had barely spoken to anyone since the incident. Your mind hadn’t stopped racing. You played over what happened on the way here over and over again, trying to figure out how much he might have heard.

The only way you were safe from dying of embarrassment was if he only heard that last bit of the conversation where Mina had replaced your last name for his. If anything you could just play that off as Mina joking around or something.

You couldn’t gain the courage to go over and ask him cause there was a pretty high chance he heard EVERYTHING. He however, did have the courage to go over to you. You noticed him walking towards you and your insides felt like they are about to explode.

“Hey y/n” he said as he played with one of the gloves of his costume. You were surprised he wasn’t the same shade as a tomato right now. You on the other hand, we’re the shade of a tomato.

“H-hi Midoriya” you studdered.

He continued to fidget with his glove, “So about what happened earlier”

NO! No no no no! You were not ready for this. You did not want to talk about this right now.

“About what you said to Ashido, I . . “

“How much did you hear?” You had to know, it was eating you alive.

“Um well, a lot of it”

SHIT! Red alert! He knows, I repeat, he knows you like him.

“Oh yea right” you awkwardly giggled. “That was um, just uh. . . “

“All right class, let’s get started” All might interrupted.

“Today we will be working on close combat. You will all be in groups of two and we will take turns one at a time, so your classmates can observe and critique your work.”

——————————————————————

Thankfully Heroics went by smoothly after your little, but very awkward, conversation with Izuku.

You didn’t speak to him the next day at school either. You didn’t know what to say and you were terrified of what he would say about what he heard. Others had noticed too, it was odd that you two weren’t holding hands or had your arms linked let alone not looked at each other.

Once you headed back to the dorms you spent the entire afternoon in your room just like the day before. Midoriya even tried to talk to you. He knocked on the door and asked if he could come in but you said you were in the middle of an assignment. Which was a lie and he knew it because you had finished all your work during free period. You were just too scared to even look at him let alone talk to him.

You didn’t leave your room until Sero came and practically dragged you downstairs for movie night.

You heard a knock on your door and prayed it wasn’t Izuku. “Hey y/n, it’s Sero”

You sighed and got up from your bed to open the door, “Hey.” He saw your tired eyes, “are you ok?”

You realized he saw right through you and replied “yea I’m good just kinda freaked out about something,” His face fell and filled with worry, “do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really, its kinda personal and embarrassing, you replied.

Sero knew not to push you. You tended to have a hard time opening up and if he kept asking you would end up never telling him, or anyone at all. “Oh ok, but if you ever wanna talk I’m all ears,” he sympathized. “Wait, I almost forgot the whole reason I came up here. We’re gonna start the movie soon.”

Crap. You completely forgot it was Friday, and Friday was movie night. Where everyone sits in the common room and watches a movie. The movie night where you cuddled with your best friend on the couch every week. The best friend that you have a crush on. The same best friend that now knows that you like him, and might like you back but you're still not sure because there is no proof.

“Ummm ya know I don’t think I can make it to movie night I have a lot of work to do” you lied.

“But didn’t you finish all your work during your free period? Remember you put your feet on the desk when you were done and Iida scolded you for descracing school property.” He replied.

Damn, he was there for that?

“Oh Yea, so I guess I am free,” you said with a fake cheery attitude as you fumbled with your bracelets. You grabbed your phone, turned off the lights and followed Sero down to the common room.

Once you two reached the living room you noticed that everyone was seated ready to play the film. There were two empty spaces to sit. One of them was right between Midoryia and Jiro. You couldn’t sit next to him and cuddle for the next two hours without your brain exploding. You tried to go to the other vacant seat but sadly, Sero beat you to it.

You had no other choice. You slowly made your way to the couch and plopped down in the empty spot as the movie started. You crisscrossed your legs and played with your bracelets again. Midoryia took note of this, he knew you always played with your jewelry when you were scared or anxious. He leaned to your ear and whispered “Hey, are you ok?”

You didn’t look him in the eye. “Yea I’m good”

You hated lying to him but you couldn’t gain the courage to talk to him.

He leaned over to whisper in your ear again. “By the way, Mina was right. I do like you back.”

This was now the second time today that you felt your heart stop. You turned your head to face him. You were inches apart. “Promise?” You asked.

“I Promise.”

You both smiled as your cheeks turned pink. You leaned into him and wrapped your arms around his waist as he put his arm around you and pulled your closer.

He kissed the top of your head, “I missed this.” It may sound cheesy, but your insides felt like they were filled with butterflies.

“I missed this too”

Over on the other side of the couch a smug looking Mina whispered to Jiro, “I knew it.”

#mha #mha fanfiction #mha fluff #mha headcanons #mha x reader #deku x reader #midoriya izuku #deku #izuku midoria x reader #mha oneshot #bnha

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bokugaos · 4 years ago

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Resistance

pairing: bokuto x f!reader

length: 1.4k

summary: Bokuto is only hot and bothered when he gets to leave a very physical mark on you yet again.

tw — noncon, violence, nipple piercings, gore, serial killer / slasher!bokuto

You try everything you can to avoid thinking back to the night he first took you away, but you can’t help it. Sometimes it just worms its way into your mind and you are back there: exhausted, frail and yielding to Bokuto’s inhuman strength.

Of course, you didn’t know him at all at the time. He was but a monster who had murdered your friends and saved you for last, apparently to subject you to unique torture.

You were so tired from running that you couldn’t fight or resist him in any way when he began tearing your clothes off of your shivering body. You didn’t think much of it either, at least until his touch expressed more intrigue than ferocity. At first you’d thought he was just trying to get a hold of you and ended up ripping your clothes in the process, but it seemed he wanted you bare for a very sinister reason.

The realization that his intentions were somehow more devious than you’d initially thought filled you with enough vigor to start putting up a fight. Even that brief burst of energy was snuffed out, however, when he easily wrestled you to the ground. Once you were out of strength for good, he sat up and pulled you into his lap, his pair of gold eyes lighting up with curiosity.

The season here sees both temperature extremes, the days are incredibly hot while nights chill you to the bone. You couldn’t help your body’s reaction to the whistling wind, your nipples perking up and hardening even without any stimulation. Bokuto had been particularly interested in your breasts, his cold rough fingers pinching around your sensitive peaks and pulling, squeezing, almost hard enough to draw blood. Eventually he moved on to explore your body in worse ways, but his attention always seemed to stray back to your breasts.

Bokuto liked the sight of your nipples, stiff and standing at attention, so much that he decided he wants to see them like that all the time. After capturing you that night in the woods and savagely fucking you into the dirt, he took you back ‘home’ with him. There, no one came for you. No one heard the awful screams he pulled from your throat when he pierced your nipples with what you hoped was a relatively clean needle. If not, at least death by means other than his hatchet or chainsaw would quickly come to free you from him.

Those hopes were dashed when days, weeks, months passed and you are still relatively healthy. You hate how well your body is taking to its new piercings, like it is wholeheartedly accepting Bokuto’s oppressive presence in your life. While you don’t have the physical strength to fight him, you’ve at least hoped to maintain the mental fortitude necessary to resist him, no matter what he put you through.

You resist him in small ways, like ignoring him when he calls for you or making it harder for him to get between your legs. Bokuto seems to like you to some degree since he is so reluctant to punish you, but you’ve found the end of his patience. If he could just get you to behave, you’d be able to see what a good man he could be.

One evening, you are very begrudgingly straddling his pelvis and riding him. His eyes are focused very intently on your breasts and the way they bounce with each move. By now your piercings are fully healed, and he loves nothing more than rolling the delicate beads between the pads of his fingers. You bite your lip when he grabs them both at the same time. You hate these piercings for a number of reasons, and one of them is that they made every touch that much more intense.

You spit at him to get his attention, somehow finding the courage to be earnest as you feels your body edge to another unwilling orgasm. Bokuto looks up at you but continues thumbing your nipples, enraptured by the way you tremble in response. Feeling like your point isn’t getting across satisfactorily, you reiterate, “You can’t keep me here forever.”

That seems to get a reaction out of him. His back is straight as he lowers his hands from you, slow and calculated. You stop moving to try to get a better look at his eyes but his grip goes up to your waist, keeping you bouncing on his thick cock. When you take the hint to continue riding him without his guidance, you make the mistake of not following where his hands go after he remove them from your body a second time. “I won’t tell anyone. Please... just let me go.”

You are ready to throw out another scathing remark when a painful sensation behind you made you bite your tongue. Your head whips around and you almost wish you haven’t looked. Unbeknownst to you, Bokuto has picked up his upholstered hatchet from the side of the bed and carved a single precise slice into the back of your ankle. You howl in pain and try to twist your body off of his, but his free arm wraps around your waist and holds you still. You can do little more than cry and convulse when he reaches over to slice your other ankle, just for good measure.

Blood bubbles out of the wounds and spills over your dry skin, staining the ratty old sheets beneath you. You fall forward, taking the lapel of his shirt between your teeth and beating your fists uselessly against his chest to cope with the pain. He looks down at you for a moment before tossing his hatchet to the floor in favor of petting the back of your head. “You’re going to be here with me for a very long time. You might as well try to enjoy it.”

Somehow it takes no time at all for your wails to die down into quiet whimpers and for your tear ducts to apparently run dry. You hate to admit it, but maybe there wisas something comforting about the way Bokuto strokes your hair. And as you lean into him, you almost swear his typically hard, gruff body actually feels soft warm enough to be loving. His heart is beating faster than normal and there is a lively flush to his skin. Before you let your mind start accepting that he is the only company you have for miles, however, you try to pinpoint the reason for this sudden change. You remember seeing him like this exactly once before. The night he pierced you, he had a similar air of liveliness to him. The warm comfort that had been getting ready to settle in your stomach was forced out by a feeling of sickness. Bokuto is only getting hot and bothered because he gets to leave a very physical mark on you yet again.

What has calmed down to a throbbing pain abruptly spiked up in intensity when he wraps his arms around your waist and begins thrusting up into you all over again. His harsh movements jostle your mangled legs and make you cry out, desperately clinging to him and digging your nails into his shirt just so you can cope with the excruciating experience. Whether he’s simply decided he wants to finish or the opportunity to mutilate you is just that exciting for him, you don’t know and you don’t ask. You simply continue grinding your teeth against his shirt as he finishes himself off inside of you.

Bokuto continues thrusting even after he comes, though not as fast. But he is forceful enough to punch up against your cervix each time, a dull ache in comparison to the agony that afflicted your ankles. When he finally settles, you think you’ll surely die of blood loss. You hope for it at least, but it is never so easy.

You can tell by the affectionate hand petting your cheek that you will be nursed back to health again, just like the first time, all so he can find another way to ruin you.

#bokuto smut #bokuto x reader smut #bokuto x reader #haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader smut #bokuto koutarou #slasher!bokuto #tw noncon #tw piercings #.bokuto!#.fics!

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here4theheartbreak · 3 years ago

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Rest, Relaxation... And Exploration

AO3 Link Here!

Collaboration with: @i-live-so-i-love Relationships: Junkook x Yoongi Genre: smut Rating: Explicit Word Count: ~5k

Tags: smut, friends to lovers, Nephilim Jungkook, monster/human Romance, mutual masturbation, handjobs, first kiss, getting together, tentacle monster, tentacles as erogenous spots

Summary: Jungkook knows that Yoongi needs a break, and wants to help him relax. He just hadn't planned on THAT kind of relaxing.

A/N: Written for @calixwrites - hope you enjoy!!

“Why are we doing this again?” Yoongi grumped, getting out of the car and squinting at the sunlight.

Jungkook twisted and stretched as he stood up, trying to wake himself after the long drive. The day was almost warmer than he’d prefer but it was perfect for what he had planned.

“Because you have been working too much in that tiny studio with no windows, no sunlight, and no fresh air for too long. You need some outdoor time,” Jungkook reminded him.

“I’m allergic to sun and fresh air,” Yoongi deadpanned.

Jungkook was used to Yoongi’s dry humor. He’d known him for years. Ever since he’d accidentally walked in on Jungkook in full Nephilim mode; all thirteen eyes and six tentacle-esque wings on display. Jungkook rarely had them out, even in private, but he’d been in a public bathroom trying to get his clothes and hair perfect for a date. And frankly, sometimes it was just easier with six extra appendages.

He had been able to keep Yoongi from screaming and convinced him he wasn’t crazy. Originally, Jungkook had only meant to keep tabs on him so he didn’t try to run to the authorities, but somehow, he’d gotten a close friend out of it. A friend that, right now, desperately needed some fresh air and a good meal.

“Hush and help me unpack,” Jungkook scolded.

Together they lugged it all up the stone steps in one go. (Tentacles really could be handy sometimes.) The beach house that Jungkook rented for cheap from a friend of a friend was small and tidy. One room served as the kitchen, dining room, and living room, plus a bathroom and a tiny bedroom. It would do for a night. The real benefit of the place was that it came with a quarter mile of private sandy beach.

“I thought the point of this was to get me out of a tiny room?” Yoongi teased after they finished looking around.

“it is. Which is why we’re going to lay out in the sun. Put some swim trunks on.” Jungkook beamed at his horrified expression.

“I’ll burn to a crisp! We don’t all have your magical immunity to the sun, you know.”

“I packed you sunscreen. The strongest I could find. You’ll be just fine. And you get to do one your favorite things. Just with fresh air and sunlight.”

Yoongi continued to look skeptical. Jungkook pouted. “Just give it a chance?”

Yoongi’s expression softened; Jungkook knew it would. The human couldn’t resist a good pout.

“Fine.”

The two of them changed and made their way across the hot sand. About halfway between the house and waves Jungkook stopped.

“The perfect spot!” He announced, setting down the bag and rummaging through it. Yoongi looked around.

“What makes this spot any different than anywhere else?”

Jungkook shook a large blue and white striped towel and laid it across the sand. He flopped onto it dramatically, the ground giving a satisfying thunk at his bulk. “Because this spot has a towel.”

Yoongi rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. Jungkook reached out, fishing through the bag for a second towel. He threw it to Yoongi, smirking when it smacked the other square in his grumpy face.

Yoongi set it out, his expression decidedly softer. He settled onto the blanket and paused before kicking his sandals off and tugging his t-shirt over his head. He rolled onto his stomach, head pillowed on his folded arms. He wiggled a little, making a spot for himself in the soft sand. “This isn’t so bad,” he hummed.

Jungkook tried not to stare. It’s not that he’d never seen Yoongi without his shirt on. There had been occasions over the course of their friendship where he’d spilled something on himself, or it was just somehow more convenient, but admittedly it wasn’t often. Jungkook hadn’t actually expected him to take it off. But there he was, his broad back looking far paler in the sunlight.

They were just friends. But, that didn’t stop Jungkook from having eyes. And Yoongi was an attractive human even by human standards. Yoongi had his eyes closed; the soft curve of his lashes and the resting pout of his lips drew Jungkook’s attention next. He really, truly was achingly beautiful.

Jungkook dug around in the bag and dropped a bottle of sunscreen next to Yoongi’s head.

“There you go, potato chip.”

Yoongi grunted and opened his eyes.

“Were you already half asleep?” He asked, rummaging through the bag for a snack.

“Maybe. Did you just call me a potato chip?”

Jungkook pulled a bag of actual potato chips from and popped it open. He smirked. “Yeah. You said you were going to get crispy. And you’re already plenty salty.” He tossed a few of the ships into his mouth.

Yoongi ignored your joke and squeezed a dollop of the lotion onto his hand. He began to rub it into his arms and face methodically. It was a little unnerving to watch his features slowly be obscured by the sunblock. He glanced up at Jungkook and cocked a brow.

Jungkook smiled sheepishly, aware he’d been caught staring in an entirely creepy way. He offered Yoongi the bag of chips in an apology. Yoongi reached for them, but paused, both his hands covered in the gloopy lotion. He shrugged and held his mouth open like a baby bird instead. With an affectionate shake of his head, Jungkook dropped a chip into his mouth. Yoongi chewed and swallowed, and demanded yet another with an open mouther.

“Too greedy,” Jungkook scolded through a laugh, dropping another chip into his mouth.

He was actively ignoring the fact that it felt a little coupley to be hand feeding him chips. It wasn’t that he’d never considered a romantic relationship with Yoongi. He just knew it would never happen. They both had busy lives and, not to mention, Yoongi was so far out of Jungkook’s league it was nearly laughable. So, any crush that may have tried to bloom was quickly uprooted; Jungkook valued their friendship far too much.

After the third chip, Jungkook tossed Yoongi something to wipe his hands with. He laid back to enjoy the sun, feeling much of his stress being chased away.

“Hey, can you do my back?” Yoongi asked, popping the bubble of relaxation Jungkook had been drifting away into. He sighed and sat up, taking the bottle from Yoongi.

“You have such pretty markings, it’s a shame to cover them,” Jungkook commented casually as he began to rub the lotion into Yoongi’s back. The lines that arched over his shoulder blade and along his spine were nearly symmetrical. As Jungkook worked lower, he wondered what the markings further extension would look like. Humans often had more complex designs in that area, but Jungkook had never seen Yoongi’s. With how shapely Yoongi was though… Jungkook could only imagine they would be just as pleasing.

“Huh?” Yoongi asked softly. “What markings?”

“These,” Jungkook traced one line that dipped along Yoongi’s spine, still faintly visible through the metallic speckled UV reflecting lotion.

Yoongi squirmed.

“Ticklish?” Jungkook asked, repeating the action.

Yoongi grunted, wiggling away from his fingers. “I will put so much spice in dinner tonight that you won’t be able to taste anything for a month,” he threatened, laughter in his deep voice.

“Oh fine,” Jungkook held up his hands, relenting. “Now hold still so I can finish.”

“Hey, I was holding still. You started it.”

Jungkook smiled at his pout and set back to work. Just as he finished up, Yoongi spoke again.

“Really though, what markings? Do I have scars or freckles that I don’t know about?”

“No, your stripes,” Jungkook explained hurriedly, hearing the worry in Yoongi’s voice.

Yoongi craned his neck back to see Jungkook over his shoulder. “I don’t have stripes.”

It was then that Jungkook remembered. “Oh! Duh. I forgot. You must not have the right ocularity to see them.”

He was normally so careful around humans. His parents had drilled into him how important it was that people didn’t ever know about his differences. He almost never brought up the things he knew humans couldn’t see with their limited visual range. But Yoongi made him feel so normal. Aside from his initial freak out, he’d never acted like Jungkook’s abilities were anything more than a unique curiosity or a party trick. His expression now remained puzzled. Jungkook closed all but two of his eyes, limiting his vision to what a human would have. He couldn’t help but frown at the way Yoongi saw himself. It was so plain, like a rainbow in black and white for a human. Yoongi was still gorgeous, but that spark was missing. A human’s markings and colorings told Jungkook so much about them than their visible light ever could. Yoongi’s were particularly stunning from day one.

“In your visible light spectrum, they aren’t there,” he further explained.

“Ocularity? That sounds like a word Namjoon would know. Some obscure thing.”

“It means the number of eyes you have normally. Though I suppose in this case it’s more about spectral frequency than actual number of physical eyes…”

“And in your eyes, I have stripes?” Yoongi looked down at himself, curious. “I must look so weird to you.” He laughed lightly.

“Not at all,” Jungkook said. “You’re beautiful.”

“Beautiful?” Yoongi cocked his head and grinned.

Jungkook could feel his cheeks heat but tried to ignore it. “Yes, beautiful. You can’t tell me you aren’t aware of how stunning you are and how many people find you attractive.”

“Maybe,” Yoongi conceded. “But I didn’t think you did.”

Jungkook’s blush deepened. He tried to ignore it, but thought his cheeks rivaled the sun’s heat at that very moment. “Anyone with eyes thinks you’re gorgeous. So yeah, that includes me. Doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re an annoying troublemaker who worries his friends by overworking thought,” Jungkook stuck his tongue out and turned away, hoping Yoongi would let it go after the riff.

“So,” Yoongi continued much to Jungkook’s disappointment, “if you have more than the usual number of eyes, and more than the usual amount of uhh… Ocularity… Does that mean you find me more than the usual amount of beautiful?”

Jungkook sighed heavily. “Does it matter?”

“It doesn’t, I guess. I just always thought you were good looking. I never realized you thought the same about me.”

Jungkook scoffed, rolling his eyes in disbelief. “I’m sure the glowing eyes and tentacle wings are super sexy to a human.” Jungkook could hear the bitterness in his voice, but it had always bugged him. Any partner he’d ever had had only seen a part of him, nobody ever saw him completely, for what he truly was. They’d call him a monster.

When Yoongi remained silent, Jungkook figured his question had been answered. But Yoongi finally responded, “it is to this human.”

Jungkook snapped his head up to look at Yoongi then laughed. There’s no way that could be true. “You’re just being nice,” Jungkook said. “I appreciate it. But… Let’s just go back to enjoying the sun, eh?” He rolled onto his back on the blanket and closed his eyes, letting his skin soak up the warm rays.

Yoongi laid back on his stomach fully, silent for the moment. Jungkook could feel him watching him, but didn’t mind. It was a comforting feeling.

“I’ve always wondered. Can you feel your wings like that? Aren’t they on your back?”

“I can, and they are. But they also aren’t. I can still feel them and move them. You’re used to thinking in three dimensions, as a human. But when I hide my wings or other parts of me, it’s like…” Jungkook frowned as he tried to find an analogy Yoongi would comprehend. “Like taking pants off a paper doll. They both still exist to you, but for the doll, it doesn’t have pants anymore.”

“So hiding your wings is like taking your pants off?” Yoongi chuckled. When Jungkook glanced over, Yoongi winked suggestively. Jungkook’s brows furrowed, confused about what had gotten into his friend today. “No, not really,” Jungkook sighed, opting to ignore the flirtation… If that’s what it was. “It’s not a perfect metaphor.”

“Do you keep them hidden because they’re private? Or so you don’t scare people?”

“I’m pretty sure people would run screaming or try to lock me up and do horrible tests on me if I just walked down the street with glowing tentacle wings and thirteen eyes,” Jungkook deadpanned.

“You know I wouldn’t thought. But you still almost always keep them hidden from me too. I wasn’t sure if it was because they were private.”

“Oh…” Jungkook pauses to consider. “I guess it’s just habit,” he finally settled on. Even home alone he rarely brought them out. Only when he needed the extra appendage to flick a light switch off across the room or carry things. There was another long pause as Jungkook thought about Yoongi’s question, and Yoongi, apparently, was thinking as well.

“Can I see them?”

“Why so curious all of a sudden?” Jungkook asked. His tone was gentle. He sat up and wiggled his shoulders a little to pull his wings into this dimension.

“Wow.” Yoongi sat up and looked over Jungkook’s shoulder, his eyes tracing the long, golden, glowing tentacles. They shifted subtly in his perception, never entirely free from the currents of the fourth dimension. “I forgot how beautiful they are.” His gaze darted over to Jungkook’s face and he frowned. “What about your eyes?”

Jungkook hesitated. “You sure? I mean glowy wings might be tolerable… But thirteen eyes…”

“I’m sure. I can handle it. No screaming this time.”

Jungkook chuckled a little. He scrunched his face and blinked a few times, letting every part of himself slip into this dimension. It felt nice, like releasing a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

Yoongi stared for a long minute, his gaze intense. Maybe it did feel more like taking your pants off than he thought it would. Jungkook considered hiding his eyes away again; maybe he had horrified Yoongi after all, but Yoongi seemed to shake himself out of whatever trance he was in.

“Sorry,” he mumbled.

The pause grew to the point of awkward between them. Jungkook sighed, but opted to ignore it. He rolled onto his stomach to lie in the sun once more, wings still out.

“Can I touch them?” Yoongi blurted out. He paused when Jungkook looked up. Jungkook could swear he was blushing. “I’m sorry, was that rude?” He asked.

“No. Not rude. Not so different from touching my arm, I guess… I don’t know, really… I don’t know a ton of other Nephilim to have some sort of reference.”

“Oh, uh, right… Sorry.”

Jungkook shrugged and sat up, facing Yoongi. Yoongi did the same. Jungkook spread the tendrils of his wings out in front of him like open hands, glancing up at Yoongi expectantly. Yoongi reached out, setting his hand on top of them. Jungkook was surprised at the sensation. It felt so strange, but not uncomfortable at all. Soothing, in a way.

“They’re warm,” Yoongi said, surprise apparent in his own voice. He stroked his hand along the length of them, and Jungkook suppressed a shudder. It felt really good. Like someone rubbing his back but… More. Yoongi shifted his hands from stroking three at a time to just one. He twirled his finger around the tip of it, as if spinning a hair. The motion sent an unexpected shiver of pleasure down Jungkook’s spine and he gasped, nearly crying out. He yanked his wings away and instantly shifted them out of sight.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean—” Yoongi cried in surprise. “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it would feel like that,” Jungkook stammered, his cheeks flushed and hot.

“Did I hurt you?” Yoongi’s brows were knitted together in concern.

Jungkook wanted the ground to swallow him whole. “No…” He mumbled. Yoongi must not have realized… “The opposite, actually.”

“Oh…”

“I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I’m so sorry,” Jungkook continued. “I honestly didn’t know it felt like that. I’ve never let anyone touch them, I didn’t know—”

“You’ve never let anyone touch them?” Yoongi asked, cutting Jungkook off.

“Of course not. You’re the only human that knows about them. Who else would have?”

“Your parents?” Yoongi suggested.

“They’re terrified of them. And besides… Now I’m glad they haven’t,” he admitted, letting out an uncomfortable chuckle.

“It’s not fair.”

“What isn’t?”

“That there’s this whole other side to you. An amazing side that you don’t get to show anyone. That you don’t get to explore at all because of how people are.”

Jungkook shrugged one shoulder. “I’m used to it. It doesn’t bother me anymore, I’ve spent my whole life hiding it. And besides,” Jungkook smiled. “You know the real me. So, one person has seen it. And accepts it… I hope.”

Yoongi nodded thoughtfully.

Jungkook looked back down at the blanket. There was a small nagging feeling in the back of his mind, a curiosity about what he’d felt in Yoongi’s hands, what more would feel like. He could explore it on his own, he figured. He wanted to put this whole awkward, humiliating event past him and get on with the relaxing weekend—

“I can help you,” Yoongi said, cutting into his plan.

“Help me?”

“You don’t know much about… That side. I mean, you didn’t know how it would feel to have someone touch them. But someday, I mean… You’ll meet someone who you can share that with, I hope. So, you’ll want to be prepared, or at least know what to expect. So, if you’re curious and wanted to, I… I could help you explore.” Yoongi looked down as he spoke, fiddling with the sand between their blankets.

Jungkook blinked, his mind taking a long moment to process exactly what Yoongi was asking. Was he actually offering… Based on his inability to make eye contact… And the beautiful pink glow of his cheeks, he was. It was strange, thinking of it, definitely not something friends did, right? Jungkook chewed his bottom lip until it hurt, his head twitching as he thought through the situation. It was definitely more than friends. And he should definitely not say yes. This held the potential of changing their entire relationship forever. Ruining it, even. Or making it something more. Yoongi had mentioned finding him attractive. But that was out of the question. No, he had to politely say no, this was something he could explore on his own.

“Okay.” The word came out firm and decisive, evidently his mouth had decided to ignore every shred of rationale his brain was giving.

“Really?” Yoongi looked up, his own eyes wide, as if he were as surprised by the answer. “You… I didn’t think you’d agree,” he admitted. “You’re sure? I do want to. But, I know this is… Big. We can stop any time.”

“I know.” Jungkook nodded. “I trust you.”

Yoongi’s entire face brightened, his mouth upturning into a gummy smile that had Jungkook’s heart fluttering and his cheeks and chest warming.

He took a breath, not sure where to start. “So… What should I do?”

“Well, I need to see them to be able to touch them,” Yoongi teased, reaching out and waving his hand in the empty space where Jungkook’s tentacles should be.

“Right.” Jungkook wiggled and let them appear once more.

“I’ll never get over how pretty that looks,” Yoongi commented. He let his hand fall, watching the movement of them for a moment.

“So, I don’t know what I’m doing here,” Yoongi said. “You’ll need to let me know how it feels, okay?”

“You mean you haven’t played with tentacles before? What kind of twenty-something year old are you?” Jungkook teased.

Yoongi scoffed. He reached out, catching one of the tentacles. He squeezed lightly, just hard enough to give some pressure, his eyes on Jungkook’s face.

“That’s okay, doesn’t hurt but… Doesn’t feel like it did before—Oh!”

While Jungkook spoke, Yoongi slid his hand slowly up and down the tentacle.

“Better?” He whispered. Jungkook nodded, closing his eyes. Yoongi repeated the motion and reached out for another tentacle, doing the same. He pulled one closer to him, twirling his finger around the tip like he had before.

Jungkook moaned softly, his eyes snapping open. He covered his mouth with his hands. “Oh, God, I—”

Yoongi let go of one tentacle to tug his hands down. “We’re alone. You don’t have to be shy.”

“This is so weird,” Jungkook mumbled, leaning toward Yoongi a little.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No, please don’t stop… Do that again?”

Yoongi chuckled. He repeated the twirling motion and then slid his hand down the tentacle, moving it back up in one fluid stroke. Jungkook felt his belly tighten up and he moaned softly, his shoulders sagging a little.

“Come closer to me, I want to reach more of them,” Yoongi whispered.

Jungkook moved onto the same towel, resting on his knees in front of Yoongi, his head bowed. Yoongi made a small noise. He moved forward, wrapping both arms around Jungkook. He caught the tentacles in his hands, sliding his fingers over them and pressing where they emerged from Jungkook’s back. His short nails scraped over one as he stroked his fingers up it, and Jungkook cried out, jerking forward.

The motion sent him slamming into Yoongi’s chest, his heart pounding wildly.

Yoongi cried out in surprise, tightening his grip on Jungkook’s back. “Hey… You okay?”

“Y—Yeah,” Jungkook stuttered. He could hear Yoongi’s heart pounding as fast as his own. The aura around Yoongi was shifting, a vibrant array of colors that would have made the most strong-willed person a little dizzy.

“Are you okay?” Jungkook worried. “Is this… Not good?”

“This is…” Yoongi drifted off. Jungkook looked up at him, meeting his gaze. Yoongi’s pupils were dilated and dark despite the sun, his gaze intense.

“This is what?” Jungkook pressed.

Yoongi swallowed hard. He shifted, pulling Jungkook closer to him. “It’s okay,” Yoongi whispered. “You can lean on me.”

Jungkook pouted a little at Yoongi’s lack of an answer, but let himself be guided onto Yoongi’s lap. Yoongi’s hands slid over his back once more, up short, anxiety bitten nails scraping over the sensitive trunks of his tentacles. Jungkook moaned helplessly, letting his forehead fall onto Yoongi’s shoulder.

Yoongi began to work each of the tentacles in turn, squeezing and stroking, rubbing, each one, testing each. Jungkook’s entire body was on fire. His stomach was knotted in a million twists, a heat and pressure more intense than he’d ever felt before building low inside his belly.

“Yoongi—” He strained.

“I’m here,” Yoongi purred. His breath was hot against Jungkook’s shoulder. Jungkook moaned wantonly. He didn’t care. He didn’t care that they were “just friends”, he didn’t care that this was just “exploring”. Every emotion he’d felt for Yoongi was rushing back. Every glance that was less than friendly, every “what if” whispered in the back of his mind, every moment shoved away and boxed up under the guise of not wanting to ruin things, not being good enough, not being human enough.

“Yoongi!” He cried again, his voice taking on a pleading lilt. He let his head fall back, leaning into the touches. He looked at Yoongi, struggling to focus. The aura of colors surrounding Yoongi seemed to reflect his own inner chaos, shifting and writhing around them. Despite all of the emotions flooding him, it still surprised Jungkook when he felt Yoongi’s lips against his own. It took him a moment to react. Yoongi’s mouth was soft and plush, tasting of the potato chips they’d shared earlier, the faintest hint of coffee from this morning. He felt Yoongi begin to pull away and made a small noise, instinct kicking in. Jungkook wrapped his arms around Yoongi and deepened the kiss, pressing every inch of his own body against him.

The tentacles that Yoongi wasn’t touching wrapped around them, brushing Yoongi’s back and neck lightly.

He could feel Yoongi’s cock, pressing up against the fabric of his swim trunks, just as hard as his own. Jungkook brought his hips down, grinding their crotches together gently. It was almost disappointing; the lack of feeling he got from it. It was nice, of course, but didn’t feel near as amazing as Yoongi’s hands on his tentacles.

Yoongi, on the other hand, reacted beautifully. His hips jerked and he moaned into Jungkook’s mouth, his grip tightening ever so slightly on the tentacles.

Jungkook pulled back, pressing their foreheads together. He began to hump himself against Yoongi, their breathing rapid as they shared the same warm pocket of air.

Curious, Jungkook let one tentacle sink down, sliding over Yoongi’s bare knee. He shifted his own seating position and pushed it up slowly, into the leg of Yoongi’s swim trunks and up. Yoongi’s eyes widened almost comically when he felt it, his hands going still.

Jungkook pushed up further, letting the tip of the tentacle brush over Yoongi’s balls, already drawn tight to his body. Up further, and around his cock. He wound the tentacle around it in a firm grip, amazed at the texture he could feel, and how good it felt. He could feel Yoongi’s pulse, fast and strong. He stroked it experimentally. Both gasped. It was so intimate. Though it wasn’t exactly like being penetrated, it was so much more than any masturbation he’d done before with anyone. He began to jerk Yoongi off slow and steady, his own climax drawing closer.

Yoongi was wiggling and moaning, clearly struggling to maintain composure. He continued to work Jungkook’s tentacles, knowing the perfect motions at this point to send all the good sparks straight to Jungkook’s guts.

“Please—“ Jungkook gasped.

“Are you close?”

Jungkook nodded. Yoongi let go of one tentacle and grabbed the front of Jungkook’s shorts. He pulled them out and pushed them down just enough for the tip of Jungkook’s cock to be exposed.

“Nobody likes come in their shorts.” Jungkook laughed breathlessly. He did the same for Yoongi, but moved back and pushed them down further.

He watched his tentacle stroke Yoongi’s cock, breathless at the beauty of it. The stripes on Yoongi’s back wound around to his front, swirling around his cock in complex, beautiful patterns.

“Together—“ Yoongi panted.

Jungkook blinked at him.

Yoongi let go of his tentacles only long enough to pull him close again. He touched the tentacle on his cock. “Jerk us both off.”

“I can barely feel my cock with you touching my tentacles,” Jungkook admitted.

He still did as Yoongi requested, unable to hide the smile when Yoongi’s hips jerked. The skin of their cocks slid together as he stroked them both with the tentacle.

Yoongi turned his focus back to the other five, matching pace as they each pulled one another toward climax.

Jungkook came first, unsurprisingly. His head fell back and he shouted Yoongi’s name. His full form shimmered into view, the intensity of his orgasm forcing him into one dimension. His cock spilled his release down the shaft, slicking the way for his tentacle as he continued to stroke them both. Every nerve in his body was on fire, even his tentacles felt as if they were tensing and releasing in time to the powerful climax.

Yoongi swore and jerked. Jungkook forced his eyes open in time to watch, not wanting to miss it. Yoongi’s release spurted onto Jungkook’s belly. Yoongi shuddered, dropping his head onto Jungkook’s shoulder as the waves of pleasure washed over him. Jungkook could nearly see it in his shifting aura, beautiful and hypnotizing.

The two sat in silence for a long time after their orgasms faded, catching their breath and letting the reality of what happened sink in. Yoongi was the first to move, reaching over and dragging the bag closer. He found the towel he’d used to wipe his hands earlier and used it once more, cleaning the release from their bodies and Jungkook’s tentacles tenderly.

Jungkook moved off him and back onto his own blanket, fixing his shorts. He shrugged a bit, his tentacles and extra eyes slipping from view once more.

“So…”

“That was…” Yoongi began at the same time. They both chuckled a little, a tension in the air.

“What do we do now?” Jungkook finally asked. He found himself unable to meet Yoongi’s gaze, afraid of what the other was going to say.

“You were saying I was handsome. I mean… That you thought I was,” Yoongi began.

“You are.”

“Was it just that? Like… You think I’m handsome but we’re friends and… That’s it? Or… More?”

Jungkook cautiously looked up at Yoongi. He was sitting in a similar position, staring at his hands in his lap.

“I’m afraid to answer,” Jungkook admitted.

“Please, don’t be. I need to know.”

“I don’t want it to ruin our friendship.”

Yoongi looked up. “If you’re scared of that… Does that mean it’s a yes? To… More?”

“I tried to ignore it. I figured we were both busy and you’re… So handsome. I’m just…” Jungkook drifted off.

“The most stunning person I’ve ever met,” Yoongi finished.

“That’s a boldfaced lie,” Jungkook snorted.

“No, Jungkook. It’s not.” Yoongi moved forward. He grabbed Jungkook’s face, cupping it in his hands. “I’ve been fascinated with you forever. You’re funny and kind and beautiful, and so interesting. I can’t get bored around you. You make me so happy. I just figured… I’m so… Human. And how dull I must be to you.”

Jungkook grimaced. “I wish you could see yourself the way I see you. You are anything but dull.”

“I lack the ocularity,” Yoongi responded, his voice shifting as he smirked. Jungkook laughed. He set his hands over Yoongi’s wrists.

“So, it seems like… We both have been interested in more for a while.”

“And were both too worried to say something.”

“Now that the truth is out… What’s next?”

Yoongi smiled softly. “I think we go take a dip in the ocean. And then make dinner… And then come lay on the beach and watch the sunset together… How does that sound?”

Jungkook smiled brightly. He let his tentacles and eyes appear, his heart skipping a happy beat when Yoongi’s smile broadened.

“I think that sounds like the perfect first date.”

#thebtswritersclub #calixwrites #i-live-so-i-love #yoonkook #yoongi x jungkook #jungkook x yoongi #sugakookie #smut #jungkook fic #jungkook smut #yoongi fic #yoongi smut #tentacles #monster x human

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alfredosauce50 · 4 years ago

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whenever youre free, can you write yandere 2p china headcanons? im just thinking abt him 👉🏽👈🏽

Yandere 2p! China headcanons

Getting together with you was hard enough. But now that you’re his, he can’t go back to being a second choice he’s always been. He’s never letting you go.

Zao doesn’t have a single yandere characteristic by default, but when he does, ooh boy. It’ll take some time for him to deviate from his normal personality and mental stability, but given enough paranoia and infatuation, he will start losing his sanity, then, his ability to distinguish between right and wrong. And the terrifying thing is, he doesn’t even know it. By this logic, he is by far, the craziest yandere you’ll ever have the misfortune of encountering.

(There isn’t a lot of fanart on 2p! China so have this fanart of Wei Wuxian for visual purposes)

Home life

He’s very into kissing, so much that he’ll sneak some in while doing the most mundane things. When he talks to you, he will hold your waist and fill the brief moments of silence with kisses. In his eyes, having his lips on yours while a conversation happens is being ‘productive’ as he makes the most out of being with you. Before anything escalates, which ends up happening more often than you’d prefer, you’ll pull away and clamp a hand over his mouth. He’ll lick your hand and laugh at your reaction.

He bathes with you. He could’ve gone with the more economical option of showering, but he’s far from broke. And plus, he can do so much more while sitting down. You usually stay on the opposite end of the tub, but he’ll pull you onto his lap and whisper this in your ear, “Don’t be shy, kitten. This is your throne.” As you sink into his embrace, which ends up hotter than the water you’re submerged in, he will caress your back and make out with you. Once you’re pleading for air, he will pull away and trail a tongue up your neck instead. When you’re with him, he never actually lets you catch your breath, ever.

Zao is very mindful of your comfort. Perhaps not when it comes to something sexual, per se, but he will always bring you a blanket if it gets a little chilly. If you forget to put socks on, he will put them on for you without asking. Whenever you go out, he will bring a bag with him and most of the things inside are either yours or for you.

Spoiling you is a given. He can’t imagine a better way to put his hustle to good use--to give you things you want. Even if you don’t ask for anything, he never fails to get you something you end up loving. But there is one thing he won’t ever let you touch. Substances. Zao is so overprotective in all aspects of your life, he doesn’t even like you drinking. He’s a little more lenient on weed, and will let you have a few puffs of his joint.

He always covers up at home, and will get a little flustered if you catch him indecent. Zao doesn’t wear a lot to bed, like tank tops and underwear, so he isn’t shirtless very often. The only time he doesn’t get embarrassed is when the mood is... You know. And he’s doing you-know-what with you. Otherwise, he will call you a pervert, but really, he’s teasing you more than expressing embarrassment. Because clearly, that’s rich coming from him.

Yeah. It’s not news how big of a pervert he is. Nor is he ashamed of it. Any dirty thought that crosses his mind, he will never fail to relay to you. It leaves you mortified when he tells you what he wants to do to you, in detail, especially when he isn’t being self-aware. Save that for when you get home, you idiot! But the private sphere only makes him even worse.

He calms down at night, thankfully, and lays in bed with you on his chest. This is where his love language starts speaking to you. Connecting to you emotionally and mentally is how he shows he loves you. This takes place in long, deep, and random conversations, and if not, he will just captivate you in his dark eyes and stare at you endearingly. “What are you thinking about, kitten? I hope it’s something related to me~” Then, he’ll dig his hands through your hair and massage your head as he breathes you in until he gets intoxicated with you.

When he gets jealous

He’s the type to get so jealous, it becomes suffocating for him--especially when he doesn’t outwardly show it. So whenever anyone remotely shows interest in you, he’ll keep his cool for the most part, but will get very irritable and clingy. It doesn’t matter how subtle they were, it could’ve been a single glance, even, but alarms will go off. He will pull you into a tight embrace and bury his face in your neck until they leave. You don’t really mind because he isn’t giving anybody trouble, but you do find it cute when he immediately returns to his soft side afterwards.

Zao isn’t the biggest fan of conflict, even if he’s more than capable of it. Instead, he will gravitate towards his intelligence and cunning to outdo anybody he hates. Stalking is definitely on the table if he needs to get to know someone, then, when it comes down to it, sabotage. He will do anything to keep them busy so they wouldn’t have to see you. And he succeeds every time without you finding out.

Unlike most SO’s, it’s easier for him to get jealous over friends than love interests. He values the emotional aspect of your relationship with him the most, and gets very upset if you bond with people other than him, platonically or not. To make up for it, he demands your attention and ensures the time you spend with him is two times more fulfilling than whoever it was you were with. This is the fundamental reason why he’s more susceptible to getting jealous--literally anybody is a rival in his eyes.

This is all the more reason to be so much more paranoid and restless than other typical yanderes.

When you argue

He doesn’t agree with you on a lot of things, so it’s like talking to a brick wall. Objective subjects are easy to get through when it’s straight up facts, but if the topic is about what he can or cannot do in the relationship, save your breath. You will never get through to him. When he feels entitled to something, he takes his own side, regardless of what you feel about it.

Nevertheless, he will do the bare-minimum of leaving you alone in the meantime when you’re upset. That’s how he somehow respects this boundary he just crossed. But a few hours later, he will go back to normal, which means he will be affectionate even when you’re not in the mood. This cues the second phase of the fight. While you’re trying your damndest to push him away, he will corner you, physically and mentally.

While he hugs you tight, he will force you to look at him while you cry. It’s invasive and suffocating, but the night always ends with you making up with him. Be it kissing or other means. It’s unfair, but no matter what he does, you can’t help giving in to him. And he knows this very well. That’s why he keeps doing it.

Psychology + When he snaps

He is much more intelligent than he lets on. Even though he already knows you like the back of his hand, he studies you every day. If you asked him what you were thinking about, he could probably guess it. That’s what makes him such an intense lover. You can’t hide anything from him if you tried. Hence, he has a terrifying amount of control in the relationship, and he will use it to his advantage.

Zao is a good multitasker. He can juggle his ‘job’ and hobbies while keeping you in the palm of his hand. There is absolutely nothing you can do without him finding out, and this is precisely how he keeps himself miles ahead of you.

As everything progresses, he will tolerate less and less. His love language is how much quality time he gets with you, along with emotional connection. Eventually, he will start ruling out the prospect of you having any of these things with anyone besides him. That includes friends, so he will start isolating you from them, all until the only soul you are truly close to is him. Soon, you will have to rely on him for everything, which he absolutely loves. He will make himself the only person in your life.

As this continues, he will become obsessed with the idea of your co-dependency on him. Zao always loved looking after you, but he isn’t satisfied with that anymore. Being your own person? Hell no. Every single thing you do, he will be in the backdrop. If not, he will be next to you, and start influencing your own thoughts until you can’t even trust yourself.

At this point, he is manipulating you to accept everything he does. And he succeeds a lot of the time, especially when he’s so unfazed. You start wondering if you should be this unfazed, even when what he’s doing is wrong.

If one of your friends tries to intervene, he will make sure they won’t see the light of day ever again. He has a lot of connections, and combined with how cunning he is, he can get them to disappear with the snap of his fingers. He will keep doing this until every single person in your life is gone if he has to.

Zao acts purely on his own desires. It’s his moral compass. Right and wrong will blur together so long as it’s for you, and there’s nothing he won’t do. Murder is as casual of a topic to discuss and do as having breakfast.

A lot of psychopaths would at least get the thrill of doing something so heinous, but he won’t give a shit. He won’t bat an eye. He won’t feel the smallest shred of remorse and carry on like nothing happened. But what he will feel is satisfaction.

If you find out what he did

You can cry all you like. He’ll only feel remotely guilty because you’re heartbroken, but it passes pretty quickly when he’s happy with what he’s done. You could try running away too. Try. But he always finds you. It doesn’t matter if you leave the country and go into hiding. He will follow you to the ends of Earth for the rest of his life. What can he say? He loves a good chase. It’s a fun game of cat and mouse he knows he’ll win.

Every time he finds you, he’ll sneak up to you from behind and whisper, “Are you done, now? Let’s go home already.” If you try to run away again, he’ll just catch you and hold you tight, even while you’re thrashing in his arms. “I can do this forever, kitten. You have nobody else to go to, and nowhere else to be. So don’t waste your energy and come back with me.”

Response to ask:

Of course :) I’m honored you submitted an ask to me after thinking about him 🤗 He’s definitely one of my favorites! Zao’s gotta be the most fleshed out 2p next to Allen. Since 2p’s aren’t canon, they rely solely on the fandom’s interpretation and ability to dish out content on them. I haven’t seen any proper yandere stuff on Zao, so I think this is a first. And boy, he’s a terrifying one for sure. I feel like he embodies the worst of the yandere trope because he’s into psychological manipulation. Worst isn’t the right word, actually. I believe ‘accurate’ is a better way of describing it. This is what a real yandere looks like.

#yandere #yandere headcanons #headcanons #hetalia #2ptalia #2p!china #2p china #2p china headcanons #Axis powers ヘタリア #axis powers hetalia #request #ask answered #hetalia fanfiction

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onechicago-upsteadrhekker · 4 years ago

Text

the trouble with wanting (is i want you) - part two

Friends!!!!! I’m here! I’m back!

I can’t apologize enough for the long wait! It certainly wasn’t intentional, but alas that is the life of a college student and unfortunately school comes before upstead as much as I wish it didn’t!

I hope part two gives you all the feels and makes up for the long absence, however, I do have something to share with you that may make you want to kill.

Part two turned into part three...

So, SURPRISE! This isn’t a two-shot; it will definitely be a three part story and I am happy to say that part three is written (mostly, I have to tweak a few things) so that will be up sometime next week depending on my school schedule.

Thank you again for your patience and I sincerely hope that you enjoy this chapter that contains no real plot, a lot of fluff and mutual pining!

As always, let me know what you think in the comments!

Tagging: @imjustwritingg, @anniesardors, @thetwit, @angelsjedi, @chichichicken, @carissalizz, @maya-asturias

Let me know if you want to be added to this list for part three!

Read on AO3

The next few days are filled with mandatory walking sessions, pain meds every four to six hours and Jay’s smiling face. He was the only reason why she wasn’t absolutely losing it because while she despised hospital stays in general, hospital stays in another city filled with people she didn’t know were downright insufferable.

But he’d made it go from something akin to glorified torture to slightly tolerable.

The bullet wound was starting to heal and the incision from where they’d had to remove her spleen was looking great according to the nurses and everything seemed to be on the right track healing wise, but anything regarding this thing that she and Jay had going on? She had no idea.

One would think getting shot in a different city, causing one partner to literally drop everything and come rushing to the other partner’s side would end in heartfelt confessions and relationships born at hospital bedsides.

But that’s not what happened, and Hailey was seriously starting to wonder if she and Jay were ever going to be on the same page. Or at least read the page aloud because she was fairly certain he felt the same way about her that she felt about him.

Because just partners don’t fly eight-hundred miles to be by your side even if you are hurt.

Right?

And it didn’t help that he was there with her almost twenty-four seven, giving her no time alone to process what he was telling her without words because before this, it had just been subtle glances and warm smiles, teasing words and affectionate eyes.

But this. Flying eight-hundred miles. It was tangible and real, and she couldn’t quite believe it was really actually happening, but then he was there, bringing her her favorite foods from restaurants she’d found during her time in New York and barely going back to her hotel room for sleep, staying by her side to keep her company and catch her up on five weeks’ worth of Intelligence news.

He was there for every lap around the hospital floor and every dressing change. He was there to shoo out the nurses when they were starting to get on her nerves and he was there, rubbing her hand softly when the pain of her bruised ribs made it hard to breathe.

And then there was the way she was constantly being referred to as ‘Jay’s wife’ instead of her own name much like when she was back in grade school and her teachers would call her ‘Sam’s little sister’.

He’d made quite the impression on the nurses and for some reason neither she nor Jay had set the record straight on the actual status of their relationship since that first day when he was mistaken as her husband.

(It was probably the same reason that they hadn’t talked about what Jay flying to New York meant. And to be honest, Hailey was sort of hoping that Jay would set the record straight on their relationship, if only to let her know where they stood.)

And she definitely wasn’t going to acknowledge the dangerous little thrill she got from hearing herself referenced that way or think about what it would be like for real. Nope, not a chance or she might never come back down to reality after having narcotic-induced dreams of three little words, ‘I do’s’, freckled little faces and laughing green eyes.

But then it’s so close, she can almost taste it and it should scare her, but it doesn’t.

Because she can feel it in the way he grins at her and in the way he tells her goodnight at the end of a long day of keeping her company. It’s in the way his arm brushes hers when he’s helping her sit or stand and it’s in the way his eyes hold hers for far longer than he should; his green eyes swimming with hints of the things she dreams.

But until she hears it. Until one of them gathers the courage to actually say the words and put a name to what they already know and feel, then she’s going to wait and guard those dreams carefully because she knows deep in her heart that when they return to Chicago, it will have either worked out or it won’t at all.

She’s not sure exactly when the pieces will fall into place or if they’ll even fit together but she knows they are at the point of no return. And honestly, that scares her the most because no matter what happens, it will always be Jay for her.

Because he was her home, and he had a place in her heart no one else could ever have and that terrified her because she knows that she’ll never get over him if for some reason it doesn’t work out between them.

She tries not to think like that because she’s pretty sure what she’s seen in his eyes is something that looks a lot like love, but it’s hard to be totally optimistic when it seems like the universe is always keeping them not necessarily apart, but not really together. At least not in the way she’s pretty sure both of them want.

So, she sits in her hospital bed, watching him laugh at her attempts to renegotiate her discharge date with the nurses and listens to him chatter about what Will’s been up to and how much he hated being tossed between Kevin, Kim, Adam and Vanessa while she’d been gone even if he liked working with each of them.

They’d been flying crooked he told her and that her not being there threw them all off so he’d be happy when he could take her back home and so would everyone else. In fact, they’d told her as much when Kim had facetimed Jay the day after he’d arrived in New York to get proof of life and see for themselves that she was truly going to be okay.

It was sweet and nice, and it made her realize how much she really did miss her team turned family even if she already felt like she was home just because Jay was beside her.

He was beside her and he was there with her and every time he looked at her over the beeping of the heart monitor she was hooked up to, everything else faded from view. The facetime calls with their friends, the friendly nurses checking up on her every few hours, the general hustle and bustle of hospital life happening outside her room.

It was just them and she’d be lying if she wasn’t looking forward to her discharge date for reasons other than just being out of the hospital because she knew then, she and Jay would truly be alone stuck in a hotel room in a city that neither one of them knew.

And that, she knew, would be the true test.

On the morning of the third day she’d been in the hospital, Hailey was given the news that she’d be released by that afternoon. If she was physically capable, she’d be jumping for joy but because of the dozen stitches in her side, she’d had to settle for celebrating internally.

Moving was still slow-going and she still felt overly tired far too early in the day, but she was confident that a night in her own bed (or at least the bed she’d been sleeping in for the past several weeks) would do her a world of good.

And she wasn’t going to think about how Jay being potentially next to her would probably make her sleep better than she’d ever had.

She didn’t know exactly where Jay had been disappearing to when he’d left the hospital at night, but she’d given him the key to her hotel room and he always came back looking well-rested so she felt safe assuming he was sleeping in the same queen bed she’d been occupying for the past five weeks.

Hailey wasn’t quite sure what would happen tonight when it was time for him to go to bed, but she wondered if this was the day they were going to finally get it right, nestled under the bed covers, whispering dreams and promises, her side aching but her heart so full.

“Here, let me help you with that,” Her gaze flicked up to Jay who had entered the room and was walking towards her, his hands already reaching out to help her pull on her coat. Hailey looked up at him as he focused his gaze on putting her left arm carefully through the sleeve of her jacket.

She wasn’t sure if a person could have reversed déjà vu, but the action brought her right back to another hospital room in a different city when she was still reeling from the panic she’d felt surrounding Jay’s terrifying brush with death.

When she’d helped him pull his familiar, worn black jacket over his sling right before she almost told him she loved him.

And now here they were again, except this time it was him helping her and this time she knew they weren’t going home without having the conversation they should have had then.

“Thanks,” She murmured softly, trying to ignore the way her heart raced when he briefly squeezed her hand.

Hailey gingerly sat down on the side of the bed, already worn out and sore from the morning’s activities of getting ready to leave.

“I called a taxi. It should be here any minute,” He grabbed her duffle and sat it beside her, “You sign the discharge papers?”

“Yes, thank God,” She muttered accepting the pair of Sperry’s Jay was handing her.

He chuckled softly, “You are so impatient.”

She shot him a look, “I’m sorry. And who was the one practically begging me to spring him from the hospital the minute he was awake and talking?”

He had the wisdom to look sheepish, but he couldn’t hide the wide smile threatening to take over. Clearly, they were both happy to be leaving the hospital room behind.

As Jay busied himself with packing the last few items into the duffle he’d brought Hailey the day he’d arrived in New York, he can’t help but watch her. She’s moving slowly, but she seems pretty alert for someone who got shot and had relatively serious surgery only four days ago.

Her eyes are bright if not tired and her hair is haphazardly thrown up in her signature high pony, but Jay still thinks she’s the most beautiful girl in the world and he almost tells her just that.

His mouth is open, forming the words when she turns to him after sliding on her shoes, catching his gaze with eyes narrowed in suspicion, “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

And he thinks this is why he can never tell her how he feels. She’s always taking the words away with a flash of blue and a dash of blonde because he wants his future to look like her so badly, it terrifies him. And even when he does finally find the words, he knows he will never be able to tell her with words just how much she means to him.

His lips quirk and he shakes his head, turning his attention back to the duffle to zip it up before nodding towards the open door of her hospital room, “No reason. You ready to go?”

For a second, he thinks she’s going to push, and they are going to have the conversation they need to have right here and now, but then she doesn’t and some part of him feels disappointed that they are making themselves wait once again.

He’s not even entirely sure why because nothing is holding them back now. Not really. They are finally both in the same city with no kidnappings, rigged elections or anything else threatening to tear them apart and yet, they are still walking that very fine line of partners and best friends to something openly affectionate and loving and real.

It’s almost too perfect because while he rushed here in a state of panic, not knowing what he would find, Hailey, for the most part was okay and now they were stuck here with basically nothing to do but wait till she could fly without risk of infection or complications from surgery.

He’s not sure if he should be worried, waiting for the other shoe to drop or thrilled that the universe seems to be giving them a hint that it was finally time to take that leap of faith from partners and best friends to something more.

“Hailey, you are clearly in pain.”

After the short taxi ride from the hospital, they were finally in the hotel room and now firmly engaged in a battle of wills.

Hailey was currently giving him a glare that reminded him of the way she would silently warn him from across the bullpen to not do something he might regret or when they were down to the last couple of fries during a long stakeout and he was reaching for them.

Generally, he didn’t win the fights when she wore that look but today, he was determined to stand his ground.

“Jay,” It was practically whined and while he understood her reluctance to take the pain meds she’d been prescribed, he couldn’t stand watching her in pain.

In the few times that Hailey’s been injured during their partnership, it hadn’t been too serious, and she usually had a good attitude about doing what she needed to do to recover. So, seeing her like this, pale and tired and just not her normal, spunky self, broke his heart and he wanted to do everything in his power to fix it.

Starting with the meds she’s determined not to take.

He was happy to at least see the trait that was so undeniably Hailey in her eyes because otherwise, she looked like a lifeless shell of the badass detective he knows she is. The oversized pillows she was propped against makes her seem so tiny and she almost blended in with the sheets she was so white.

If he was being honest, she was starting to look worse than she did when she was in the hospital and that definitely concerned him enough to possibly make him take her right back there or at least call Will for his opinion.

Sighing, he uncrosses his arms to move from where he’s been standing a few feet away from the end of the bed holding the prescription bag in a clenched fist.

Her eyes track his movements as he comes to gingerly sit down at the edge of the bed, leaning over on his forearm to look at her closely, “Hailey,” He shakes his head, “Please just take them. At least so you can get some sleep. You look exhausted.”

For a second, he thinks that she’s going to keep fighting him, but then he sees the weak mask she’d had in place slip, the dull look of pain and exhaustion becoming clearly present in her eyes.

“Okay, fine,” She sighs out wearily, and he’s a little surprised that she conceded that quickly even if he knew he’d already won, but then she cocks her head slightly, “What do I get in return?”

Yeah, he didn’t think he’d won that easily.

Jay pushes the flirty and slightly suggestive response that instantly pops into his head to the back of his mind. There would be plenty of time for that later, or at least he desperately hopes so because he knows that now is not the time to start anything of that nature.

When he tells Hailey what she deserves to hear, he wants her feeling halfway decent and looking healthier than she does right now.

If they were in Chicago, he would bribe her with Bartoli’s, but they weren’t. They are in New York and she’s already made it quite clear that the pizza here is a tragedy, so he doesn’t think she’d want that particular food even if he could find a copy-cat deep-dish place.

So, he goes for the next best thing, “What about some Greek? It probably won’t be anything like Greek Islands, but I’m sure I can find a decent place. I could grab you some Pastichio. What do you say?”

The way her eyebrows furrow and her bottom lip sticks out adorably makes him want to kiss the pout away, but he doesn’t.

She shakes her head, “I don’t want Greek.”

Jay bites his lip briefly and refrains from making a comment on the childish tone of her voice as he regards her carefully for a quiet second.

He would never admit it, but he knows he’s a much worse patient when their positions are reversed so he’s more than willing to put up with her stubbornness because he knows it’s just a way to cope with the pain.

And besides, he loves her. He would do whatever he could to make her feel better.

“I’ll get you whatever you want as long as you take your medicine, so why don’t you tell me what it is you’d like to have,” He pushes himself up off his forearm to sit upright, but he still holds her gaze.

She sighs carefully, picking at the covers before answering him, “A Snickers bar.”

Jay raises his brows.

In the years he has known her, he doesn’t think he’s ever seen her eat a candy bar. She could down a piece of chocolate cake at an event, or the random chip bag she’d found during a stakeout, but he doesn’t think he’s ever seen her eat the overly processed candy bar before.

“You like Snickers bars?” He can’t help the slightly disgusted tone of his words.

Hailey’s expression instantly morphs into a defensive one, “A girl can have guilty pleasures, and this just so happens to be mine. Now, you said you’ll get me anything if I take my medicine, so you’re lucky it’s not something like a new gun. Or a car.”

Jay rolls his eyes and Hailey desperately wants to swat him but she’s already in a significant amount of pain so she doesn’t think that would be the wisest decision.

“Relax, I will get you your Snickers bar. I promised, didn’t I?” He smirks a little as he moves off the bed to grab his coat that’s thrown over the back of the desk chair, “I just can’t believe I didn’t know you liked candy bars.”

Shrugging a little, she tries not to wince at the pain that small movement caused her, “I don’t indulge in them much; only when I’m not feeling good or if there’s literally nothing else to eat.”

After gathering up his wallet and phone, Jay stops in the middle of the room to regard her for another moment. He shakes his head, “What else don’t I know about you, Hailey Upton?”

She gives him a little smirk of her own, “Lots of things, I’m sure. I was once told I was aloof about my personal life.”

“And just when I thought I was getting to know the person under that tough exterior,” He feels the smile creep over his face, and he doesn’t care that he probably looks like a man hopelessly in love because he is.

He watches as her own expression softens and for just a moment, their eyes meet. A thousand words of unspoken love pass between them and he can see his entire universe in those captivating, blue orbs just as she can see a million promises in his.

Hailey shifts and winces at the sharp pain it causes her, cursing herself for ruining the moment. Those pain pills she’d tried refusing were looking pretty good right about now as the throbbing intensified around her still tender ribs.

Jay noticed her discomfort. He always does, and she could see the concern so clearly on his face it made her heart swell in love. He’s the most caring man she’s ever met, and it’s one of the things she loves most about him.

“As soon as I get back, you’re taking your meds,” Jay frowns, rubbing his thumb briefly along his hairline before dropping his arm, “I’d give them to you now, but I’m not sure I should leave you alone with narcotics in your system just in case. And besides, you need to take the antibiotics with food, so I’ll pick up something while I’m out.”

She just nods, picking up the remote for the television, “Sounds good. I’ll be here watching whatever trash I can find on TV, so hurry back.”

Jay gives her one last smile that warms her from head to toe before he opens the door and walks out.

When Jay walks through the hotel door about an hour later, he has the overwhelming urge to call out a ‘Honey, I’m home’, but he doesn’t want to wake Hailey if she’s sleeping and he’s not sure how she would respond to the term of endearment even if it is said teasingly.

It’s funny how that is the thing he feels would be crossing the practically non-existent line they have towing for the past several days. Or weeks really if he’s honest with himself.

As it turns out, she’s not sleeping but still in very much the same position he’d left her in. The TV was on, a rerun of ‘Happy Days’ playing quietly but she doesn’t seem to be paying much attention. Instead, she’s looking down at the phone in her hand, clearly scrolling through something before glancing up at him.

Her eyebrows rise as she takes in the various Target bags he’s carrying in both hands. Hailey let her phone drop in her lap, more interested in what Jay had bought because all she’d sent him out for were Snickers Bars, “Did you buy the whole store?”

He frowns at her as he finds the bag of take-out Chinese he’d ended up getting for their late lunch-early supper to set on the nightstand, “No, I did not, but I did get real food and,” He holds up the other bags he was carrying, “I got you your Snickers.”

Whatever else he’d bought was forgotten as she beamed up at him, already reaching for the candy bar he was digging for throughout his purchases. When he finally found what he was looking for, he tossed it to her, and she immediately ripped open the wrapper.

He makes a face as she bites into the sugary chocolate, “I still don’t know how you eat that crap.”

She responds with an eyeroll because her mouth was too full to make a witty comeback.

“You could at least wait till you ate actual food first,” Jay arched a disapproving eyebrow, his nose wrinkling as he watched her make an obvious display of enjoying her treat. He shakes his head and deposits the Target bags on the lower end of the bed to pull out the bottles of vitamin water he’d bought for her.

“Here, I got your favorite and a couple of new ones for you to try,” He handed her the blackberry flavored one before retrieving the pill bottles that were sitting on the nightstand beside their bag of food.

He read the instructions on each bottle then opened the oxycodone to dump one out, “Okay, you can have one right now and,” He checked his watch, “One at around seven then another at eleven.”

Hailey frowns, but takes the pill out of his outstretched palm anyway, “I hate the way these make me feel. My head feels fuzzy, and I can’t think clearly.”

Jay gives her a sympathetic smile and offers a simple, “I know” because he does know, but he also knows that if she has any hope of getting rest tonight, she needed to be well medicated.

“Maybe tomorrow we’ll try going all day without pain meds, okay? I just want to make sure you have a good night’s rest tonight since it’s your first night out of the hospital,” He tells her as he shakes out an antibiotic pill and then the iron supplement the doctor had prescribed her with for the next few days to hand to her.

Nodding, she knocks the three pills back and takes a swig of her vitamin water. Meeting his gaze, she reaches out to grab his hand and gives it a tight squeeze, “Thank you, Jay.”

The heavy tension that settles over them is now a familiar one and it’s almost comforting in a way as she tells him with her eyes how grateful she is for him.

After a few moments of silence, she clears her throat and withdraws her hand, turning her attention to the bags of stuff piled on the bed, “So, what’d you get?”

Jay blinks, shaking himself out of the trance they’d just been in as he rifled through the things he’d bought, pulling them out to show Hailey, “Well, I did some research and according to WebMD which was confirmed by my brother, weighted blankets can help with muscle soreness and speed up the recovery process.”

“I also got some ice packs,” He dumps out about a dozen before reaching in yet another bag, “And I picked up some of your favorite movies as well as a couple of pairs of fuzzy socks because I know you didn’t pack any and the hospital socks are terrible.”

The tears that spring to her eyes aren’t unexpected because the fact that he knows and remembers how much she loves wearing fuzzy socks when she’s at home decompressing tells her how much he cares even if he hasn’t really said it out loud yet.

The research, the weighted blanket, the movies, the treats, the socks; it’s slightly overbearing, but it’s sweet and it’s so undeniably him that it makes her heart hurt with the love she has for him.

She gives him a soft smile, “For someone who claims to not know me, he sure does take care of me and brings me all of my favorite things.”

“Well, after four years I would hope to know some things,” Jay smirks at her before moving to put the ice packs in the small fridge/freezer combo they had in the room.

He looks back at her over his shoulder, “But, I somehow missed your Snickers habit and it makes me wonder what else I should probably know, but don’t.”

Rolling her eyes, she watches as Jay moves back over to the bed, going for the food he’d sat on the nightstand.

“You know you’re not exactly an open book,” She points out with a wry smile.

He’s not an open book, it’s true, and even though she’s teasing him about it, she knows him better than anyone. Maybe better than even Will knows him. Maybe better than he even knows himself, and it’s ironic because the way she knows him better than anyone is more so through his actions and not his words.

She knows his heart through his acts of compassion. She knows his mind through his steady emotions. And she knows him because he lets her see the deepest parts of himself, unspoken secrets swimming in his eyes and dark memories whispered over drinks.

She knows the things that matter and the same could be said about the things he knows about her, but now that it’s being brought up, she does wonder if there are any meaningless habits she hasn’t bared witness to.

If her mind goes straight to those of a personal nature such as nighttime routines and shower preferences, then she’d never admit it.

“Well,” He handed her a container of Shrimp Lo Mein, “We’re stuck in this hotel room with basically nothing to do so,” Jay sat down on the bed, facing her with his own container of Chinese, “Let’s play a game.”

Hailey arches a skeptical eyebrow, “A game?”

“Yeah,” Jay nods as he takes a bite of his own Lo Mein, “Like one of those ‘get to know you’ games since we apparently don’t know much about each other.”

She frowns, a little unconvinced at this plan and what it could entail, but she’s curious and the slight woozy feeling she feels from the pain meds makes her ask, “What kind of ‘get to know you’ game? Like truth or dare?”

Smirking, he shakes his head, “No. Although, that could be extremely entertaining.”

“Uh-uh. No way am I drinking a bottle of hot sauce or jumping off the balcony or some other insanely difficult thing that you would think was easy,” She takes a bite of her food, trying to shake back the loose hair that keeps falling into her face, “I just had surgery.”

He’s full-on grinning now, chuckling at her impassioned response, “Nothing like that. I was thinking more along the lines of 21 Questions.”

Hailey tries to take another bite of her food, but her hair gets in the way again. She’s starting to get frustrated at the locks that keep falling into her eyes and mouth, making it hard to eat.

Sticking her chopsticks into the take-out container, she uses the now free hand to push her hair behind her ears as she shrugs, “Alright then. We don’t really have anything better to do other than watch movies and eat takeout anyways.”

The way his eyes sparkle at her answer is worth all the cheesy questions she’s sure he’s going to ask.

He stands up, shoving a used napkin into his now empty takeout container and she’s always amazed at how quickly he can down food when he wants to, “We can alternate asking questions and we don’t have to ask exactly 21 questions. It can be more, or it can be less.”

He throws his trash away and starts cleaning up the bed, moving all of the empty Target bags and the stuff he bought off to one side, “Is there anything off limits?”

She hesitates before saying no, shaking her head because while her natural inclination is to keep everything close to the vest, she knows there is nothing that she wouldn’t share with Jay if he asked her.

He makes her feel safe, and she’s constantly finding herself telling him things that she’d never said out loud before anyway, so she already knows that he will guard her secrets and feelings and thoughts deep in his own heart as if they were his own.

It’s like he knows what she’s thinking because the way he smiles at her is so gentle and the secretive sparkle in his eyes is what tells her that the same goes for him.

“You wanna go first or do you want me to?” Jay cocks his head, looking at her as he tears into the weighted blanket.

“You can go first,” She goes to take another bite of food when her hair falls into her face for what feels like the hundredth time.

She sighs internally, her frustration going unnoticed by Jay who had turned back towards the movies he’d bought, opening each of them as he tells her he has to make this first question a good one.

Pretty quickly after waking up from surgery, Hailey had found putting her hair up in its typical ponytail an almost impossible task because every time she raised her arms to gather her hair up, her stitches would pull, and her ribs protested loudly.

After several failed attempts that left her eyes watering, she ended up having a nurse put it up for her and she continued to ask for it done in the mornings before Jay arrived at the hospital to keep her company.

But now, there was no nurse to gather up her long, annoying hair when it keeps falling in her face and even though she’s stubborn enough to try it, Hailey knows if she pulls on her stitches or possibly breaks one, then she’s going to be paying for it tomorrow all because she wanted to put her hair up herself.

She sighs again, this one audible as she sets her Chinese container on the nightstand, “Jay?”

“Yeah?” He turns to look at her, his brows furrowed in concern.

Hailey bites her lip sheepishly as she snaps the elastic band around her wrist against her skin, “Can you put my hair up?”

He looks surprised for a moment before he smirks at the slight blush dusting her cheeks at having to ask for help with a task this simple, “Of course I can, Hailey.”

She hands him the ponytail holder as he walks over to the side of the bed, “But I will warn you. I’ve never done this before.”

She wants to tease him. Maybe tell him he’d better start practicing now if he ever hopes for a daughter one day, but it feels too on the nose when she wants that daughter to be hers too.

So instead, she smirks at him as he moves behind her to start gathering her hair up in awkward chunks. Hailey glances at him out of the corner of her eye, fake gasping, “Don’t tell me that the brave and noble Detective Jay Halstead, the man who jumps over moving cars and shoots sniper rifles doesn’t know how to put hair up in a ponytail.”

“Oh, shut up,” He grumbles good-naturedly, still trying to smooth her blonde hair into his loosely closed fist on top of her head, “It’s not like I’ve really had the opportunity or need to practice.”

Chuckling, she lets him concentrate on pulling her hair through the elastic and tries not to get lost in the feeling of his fingers in her hair and the warmth radiating off him. Her eyes flutter close and she marvels at how gentle he is even with the strength of his hands, well-conditioned in the act of squeezing a trigger.

And just like when making those shots, the precision in which he does everything is still there as he carefully tightens the elastic, securing her hair into place.

Hot breath hit the back of her now exposed neck and she can’t help but shiver. Before he’s stepping away, she swears she feels his hands brush her skin and she wonders if he’s equally as affected as she was by his closeness.

But before it can turn into anything, he’s smiling and settling back into his spot at the foot of the bed, gesturing to the ponytail he’d just completed, “It’s not as good as you do it, but I think it’ll pass.”

“I’m sure it’s fine, Jay. It’s out of my face and it’s not like anyone will see it,” She grins at him as she picks up her food, intending to finish it off now that her hair won’t get in her way.

Jay frowns teasingly, “Hey, and what about me? Am I not someone?”

She smiles softly in amusement, “You’ve seen me in worse states and you’re not just anyone, you know that. You’re my best friend, Jay,” She hesitates because she knows that’s not strictly true. He is her best friend and he’s her partner but he’s also the man she loves, and it would be so easy to let the truth slip out.

Looking at him, she sees something in his eyes that looks like hope or maybe anticipation and she wonders if he thinks she’s going to tell him the one secrete she just can’t seem to get out. Maybe she would have told him if they sat there for a few seconds longer, but his phone buzzes and the moment is gone before it really even began.

Hailey wonders if phones are going to be their downfall.

She thinks she sees disappointment flash across his face, but she blinks and he’s looking at his phone with a serious expression.

“Is everything okay?” Her brow furrows as she watches him type out a quick response and put the device back into his pocket.

He shakes his head, sighing, “That was Kev. The Latin Players are on the verge of waging war against a new up and coming gang called The Jets.”

Interjecting, Hailey raises a brow, “As in West Side Story?”

“Yep,” Jay lets out a wry chuckle, “Anyway, the team flipped someone on The Jets’ side, and it looks like they are possibly willing to play ball so Kev was asking for some background info on my Latin Player connect because Intelligence is going to attempt to negotiate a truce before it can escalate to a full-blown gang war.”

She groans quietly, all too aware of the potential complications and ramifications that come from this type of violence, “That’s just what the city needs. A gang war.”

He huffs in agreement, dropping his head in disgust and she can see the tension in his shoulders. Even eight-hundred miles away, the crime and the innocent people that inevitably gets tangled up in it affects him.

Hailey frowns, her eyebrows furrowing in concern. She reaches out a hand to lightly touch his bent knee, “Jay.”

He looks up at her and the empathy she sees in his eyes makes her heart swell in what’s becoming a familiar sensation. Love and pride and admiration and respect for this man she has the privilege to know.

Her eyes soften and she smiles gently at him, an earnest look on her face, “If you need to go home, go home Jay. I’ll be alright here by myself. I don’t need you to take care of me.”

If the situation wasn’t so serious, she might have laughed at the way his eyebrows shoot up in surprise, clearly not expecting those words to come out of her mouth.

Recovering, his eyebrows furrow and he shakes his head adamantly, “No way. They can get along without me. I’m not leaving here without you and I don’t care if you think you can take care of yourself because who’s going to help you change your bandages or make you take your medicine or keep you company?”

He challenges in a slightly playful manner, but the eyebrow he raises dares her to contradict him and she knows he is serious, “Besides, I need to be here if I want to keep my own peace of mind. I don’t work well without you, so I’m not sure how much help I’d be anyway.”

She knows that no matter the circumstance, Jay would always perform above and beyond the call of duty, but she also knows that this is his way of telling her that he needs her and the way he was willing to stay with her in New York makes her heart stutter in yet another way.

Before she can dwell on the feeling any further, he’s smiling again, his eyes crinkling with mischief, “Now back to the game. I think I have the perfect question for you.”

Sorry it ended in a bit of an awkward spot, but I decided to split it into two parts when I hit 10,000 words and I still wasn’t done yet lol so I didn’t know this was going to be the ending of a chapter.

I’d love to hear what you thought and stay tuned for part three!

#upstead #upstead fanfiction #jay and hailey #hailey and jay #onechicago #chicagopd

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yeojaa · 4 years ago

Text

NOT YOUR FAIRYTALE - ft. myg

What do you do when you've called your wedding off but forgot to cancel your cake tastings? Why, you ask your brother's grouchy best friend, of course.

pairing. min yoongi. sort of.

genre + rating. fluff-adjacent. general.

warning / tags. mentions of infidelity, cake tasting, cake tasting isn’t a euphemism, fluff and hurt/comfort, alternate universe, alternate universe - modern setting, friendship, friendship/love, childhood friends.

reading. n/a. a stand-alone three part one-shot.

word count. ~1850

chapter iii.

“I didn’t mean it, Yoongi.”

The apology is off your tongue and crashing into his ears before you have a second to consider it, pleading colouring syllables in soft shades of blue. You hate the way he’s looking at you, like you’ve found the chink in his armour and are on the verge of exploiting it.

“It’s fine.” Over a decade of friendship tells you it’s decidedly not fine. His concession comes far too quickly, meant to placate whatever guilt he’d accidentally kicked up.

It makes you feel worse, the weight increasing tenfold when he offers you his seldom-seen smile. Gums flash, corner of his mouth hitching over soft pink tissue. It doesn’t quite meet his eyes though, falling just short of the endlessly dark depths of his irises.

“Seriously. Forget about it.” You know he’s doing his best to force you onward but you can’t help but dig your figurative heels further into the dirt. An immovable force.

“I’m really sorry,” you repeat, voice thick with meaning.

Yoongi huffs a little, seemingly frustrated. You shrink a little further in on yourself, shoulders dropping and lips shifting in tandem. You’re probably pouting. You feel his stare from your periphery, feline gaze focused wholly on the way your mouth turns and turns around words you’re trying to perfect.

Silence stretches on, longer than you can stand and far more awkward than you’re used to. You can feel it like a suffocating weight, a goose down comforter in the heat of summer - heavy and unpleasant.

“I’m sorry.” It squeaks out in the same instant he sighs. He sounds less irritated, though you can see the tension in his chin, how it jumps the muscle in his jaw.

“You don’t have to keep saying it.”

“But I don’t think you’re heartless, Yoongi. I shouldn’t have said it.” You say it like it’s crucial - as if you might perish if you don’t get them out. They sweep into the spaces between you, earnest and full of fear, filling all the cracks left by your own hand.

You layer your reassurances as best you can, tongue tripping over teeth as you ramble about all the different ways you see him.

In shades of diffused morning light, lined with silver like a physical reminder that there’s always hope. Through the lens of childhood admiration, sprinkled with childish laughter and doe-eyed awe. With as much unconditional love as you’ve ever been capable of, wrapped up in furtive glances and curious, miserably nonchalant texts to your brother.

It comes and comes, word vomit that won’t stop until you’re brought back by the expression on his face. It’s tender, bemused - reminiscent of a parent of an overzealous child. You’ve seen it a million times before, though the instances were much fewer and far between now that you were older.

You immediately backtrack. “I’m sorry.” This time it’s for wasting his time, for being his best friend’s annoying little sister.

You’re tumbling over your own two feet again. You’ve said too much by the time he speaks at all.

“You’re more than that.” A statement of fact, seemingly, by how he delivers it with such ease, as if it hasn’t just set your heart off in your chest, the poor thing stuttering to life (or death). You’re not sure.

Despite your best efforts, the singular word gives you away, coloured canary red with hope. “What?”

If he’d heard your question at all, he says nothing, footsteps never faltering. He’s walking ahead like he hasn’t just turned your world on its axis, throwing you completely off-balance. He doesn’t even offer a glance back, halfway down the block by the time you come to your senses.

You jog to catch up, fingers eager to close the distance you quickly eat up. You settle into a measured pace behind him, though your mouth moves at a mile a minute. You can feel the maddening persistence in your bones, hear it as it carves demands into what was once comfortable silence.

“Why did you say that?” No response. “Yoongi!” He doesn’t even flinch, gaze trained ahead as if he’s never been in Apgujeong before and he’s terribly interested in everything but you.

The distinct urge to stomp your foot fizzles through your limbs and you almost do. You’re rooting yourself to the spot, sneaker raised comically, when he rounds on you. Brows have disappeared into his swath of dark hair and his chin tilts just so, studying you quizzically. It looks like he’’s having an internal debate as to whether he should rib you further.

He decides against it - returning to the conversation you’re so adamant to have. “You know, for being a Kim, you’re not that bright.”

“Excuse me?” Indignation bursts out your mouth. You’re focusing too hard on the words he’s spoken than the implication behind them. They sail over your head, lost to the pretty coral that streaks across the sky and eats up the horizon.

To Yoongi, it’s like watching his literal heart fly out the window. He’s a little exasperated when he speaks again. “You’re my best friend’s little sister. I don’t know what you expect me to say.”

“What’re you saying?” Because you’re really confused now. You think Namjoon would be too.

Are you even having the same conversation?

“Do I need to spell it out for you?” The line of his mouth quirks, corner stretching into something that borders on a smirk. It’s devilish - decidedly not something you’re used to - and you imagine your stomach kickflips before wrecking itself on the pavement.

Your silence seems to be answer enough.

He heaves a sigh as if he’s been terribly inconvenienced, arms folding over his chest. The gesture should read as don’t come near me! but you have the very distinct urge to fold yourself under his arms. You resist it by biting down hard on your bottom lip.

“I’ve had feelings for you since we were kids. Specifically since you had your 10th grade ballet recital and you kept the bear I got you.”

You remember the day like it was yesterday. You’d been lucky enough to land the coveted spot in the winter showcase and he’d been there, shoulder to shoulder with your brother, when you’d taken your bow. The bouquet of peonies he’d brought you - in soft shades of blush and violet, your favourite colours - had nearly engulfed your frame and you’d had trouble holding both it and the sweet brown bear that came with it.

The same bear that still sat on your bedside table, propped up beside your charging cable and yearly planner. The one you’d cried yourself hoarse over after you thought you lost it during your freshman year of college.

“I don’t understand.” You frown, deeply. You can feel the little dent between your brows. It comes out when you’re stressed or confused or, in this instance, both.

He’s more teasing than unkind: “Like I said - not that bright.”

You ignore the dig. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I couldn’t do that to Joon. I promised I wouldn’t.”

Somehow, that’s more of a revelation than Yoongi’s confession.

“He knows?” You can’t help the gasp that ricochets out of your mouth, belligerent and betrayed. You’re already running through the 100 different ways you’re going to kill your brother. Because he’d known! While you’d pined, Namjoon had known and simply stood by. “He knows how I feel about you and he didn't say anything?”

You know if you think about it, you can’t blame him. You’d given him a hard time too when he and Sora seemed to get along a little too well. Call it a sibling thing.

In the heat of the moment though, you’re livid. So Yoongi does what he does best and redirects effortlessly.

“—feel?”

The prompt reassigns all focus back to him, your anger toward your brother all but forgotten. You think you could give Pikachu a run for his money by the surprise that works itself into your expression. Heat licks itself across your cheeks, rolling like a steam engine over the exposed skin of your neck and up past your ears. Had it suddenly jumped 20 degrees?

“I mean felt.”

When Yoongi steps forward, you’re hyper fixated on the way his mouth bends and bows, gums and neat white enamel revealed by the motion. You’re rooted to the spot as he’s suddenly all you can see, crown of dark hair blocking the light from behind him, narrow shoulders curling in on you. He’s near enough you can smell his comforting, woody scent.

You haven’t been this close in - well, ever, you think.

Then he kisses you - a chaste thing, right on the cheek - and you forget how to breathe.

“I guess we’ll need to change that.”

SIX MONTHS LATER

“I’m honestly surprised,” your boyfriend drawls, the picture of disinterest as he leans himself against the packed counter top, elbows propping himself up. He’s staring out at the sea of people swarming the apartment, a comfortable group of new and old coming together to celebrate something very important.

He watches as your brother narrowly misses knocking over the beer pong table, earning a groan from the participants. Jungkook yells something about his shot being messed up; Jimin denies a re-throw. There’s more incoherent shouting.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

You’re at his back, arms twined neatly around his slender waist as you press your face into the warm expanse of his back. The sweater he wears is overly soft from years of wear and it feels good under your reddened cheek.

You’d had a bit to drink and you were feeling exceptionally affectionate.

“You actually kept it a secret.” Not that he hadn’t figured it out himself. It was in your nature to throw surprise parties - you did for Namjoon and Jin and that loud best friend of yours - so he’d only figured he would get one when the time came.

“We’re very good at keeping secrets in this family, remember?” Your voice carries past the cotton of his clothes, filtering through laughter to kick his beating heart into overdrive.

“Oh, how could I forget.” He snorts quietly, turning in the same instance you unlatch yourself from him. He has to fight the look of disappointment that threatens to pull his mouth into a pout, brow knitting in disapproval as you round on the refrigerator.

It’s only when you spin back to face him that his expression cracks and re-sets itself with glee. Now he’s actually surprised.

Because you’ve got a cake box from the same bakeshop you’d gone cake tasting at. He recognizes the logo on the front and the pretty frosting behind the plastic cover. It’s shades of cream and citrus and decorated with cherries. Your - and his - favourite cake from that day.

“You’re not supposed to see the cake ahead of time!” It’s Namjoon bursting into the kitchen looking alarmed.

You laugh first, bright and sunny. “It’s a birthday cake, not a wedding dress.”

But as you kiss him, cake cradled gingerly between your bodies, Yoongi thinks he wouldn’t mind seeing you in that, either.

notes. this final chapter was short and sweet but i hope you enjoyed it. thank you for reading! x

tag list. @hoodmeup @loveyoongles @vi-hoshi

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culticunti · 4 years ago

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may i please get sasuke for the whole fluff alphabet? ty either way!

hi my love, thanks for stopping by! enjoy (o´ω`o)ﾉ

A... Affection - How do they show affection?

Sasuke isn’t very physically affectionate, and will even push you away at times. He shows affection through words, and through sitting down with you at the end of the day, watching the dying embers of the fire, and pouring his soul out in words that are spoken too softly for their heavy meanings.

B... Babe - What kind of nicknames do they give you?

He’s not one for nicknames, but he does indulge in the occasional “babe” or “Honey”. Mostly, though, he calls you by your name, but for some reason when he says your name, it might as well be a pet name from the way it makes the butterflies in your stomach do laps.

C... Coddle - How differently do they treat you in a relationship/out of a relationship?

Outside of a relationship, Sasuke is very stoic. There’s always people begging and pleading for his attention, yet he’s always only had eyes for you. In a relationship, he’s much less stoic, but he still tries to keep his distance to avoid getting too emotionally attached. ( That doesn’t work, of course, but let’s let the poor man have one thing. )

D... Daddy - Do they get along with your parents?

Your parents absolutely adore Sasuke! When he’s away from the public eye, he’s so courteous that he practically had your parents begging you to marry him from the first time they meet him.

E... Earful - How talkative are they about your relationship with other people?

Sasuke is relatively quiet about your relationship, though sometimes he’ll talk to Kakashi about how happy he is that you’re in his life. He can’t help but let a look of pure bliss slip onto his features, eyes crinkling and a light flush covering his cheeks, which rewards him with nothing less than a wide-eyed look from his former Sensei.

F... Flaunt - Do they brag about you?

Sasuke brags about you to the people who approach him to ask for a date. He'll probably say that he already has a partner that he has no intention of leaving, and his lips will curl on satisfaction when the group crowding him disperses.

G... Gifts - Do they spoil you?

Absolutely. Sasuke tries to compensate for his lackluster physical affection by buying you everything that you show even the slightest interest in. At first, it was suspicious, and you began to think that he wanted something from you, that he was trying to ask for through gifts. But no, he simply enjoys watching the joy on your face when you receive something you've been waiting for.

H... Heartfelt - How do they compliment you?

His compliments are soft-spoken, almost inaudible, and if you weren't paying attention, you'd miss it entirely. His words are so achingly full of emotion that he gets choked up on them, reaching out a shaky hand to brush a strand of hair out of your face.

I... Intuitive - How easily can they read your emotions and comfort you?

Sasuke may seem emotionally constipated, but he’s anything but unaware. He can read your emotions like an open book, pages laid out and sorrows so plainly obvious to him that he can’t help but try to reach out with shy, comforting touches.

J... Jealousy - How easily do they get jealous over you? vice versa?

Sasuke attracts the attention of a ton of people, and you can’t help but be jealous. You knew none of the people who approached him had even a sliver of a chance with him, but you couldn’t help your heart racing and your face glowing in embarrassment as people who adored him looked at you like you were nothing but scum.

Sasuke was very overprotective of you, if not a little obsessive. Any man or woman who gave you even so much as a second glance was struck with Sasuke’s heated glare that seemed to strike their hearts as it sent shivers up their spines.

K... Kisses - Where is their favorite place to smooch you?

Sasuke isn’t the type to beat around the bush. He loves to kiss you out of nowhere, lips always tasting like some variety to juice. Full and greedy, his usual appetite doesn’t even compare to how constantly starved his lips felt against yours, like a starving man hungry for food.

L... Lonely - How attached to you are they?

He’d never admit it, but Sasuke simply can’t live without you. On any given day, he’d lay down his life for you, but at the same time, he still tells you to stay on your side of the bed. ( Even if this never works, and you always wake up with a Uchiha pressed into the crook of your neck. )

M... Mannerisms - What silly things do they do for your attention?

Sasuke almost reminded you of a cat, always curious and ever so push, but never in a blatant way. He’ll follow you around for hours, eyes never leaving the back of your head, silently trailing you like a predator stalking its prey, until you can’t take it anymore and ask him what his damn problem is.

A small smile creeps onto Sasuke’s lips as he laughs, wide smile and scrunched up eyes so contagious you can’t help but laugh along with him about his stupid antics.

N... Name Tag - Who’s name would they take after marriage?

Sasuke would keep his name, but it’s up to you to decide what to do with your last name. He loves you more than anything, and he’s not really bothered by the fact that your last name won’t be Uchiha, Sasuke is just happy to have you all to himself.

O... Oath - What promises have they made you?

A long time ago, when the two of you were all but children, Sasuke promised to marry you when the two of you were old enough, and not a single second later.

P... Provoke - What silly things do you do to get their attention?

It’s quite hard to piss your lover off, but you know how to do it in just the right way every single time. Your best ploy to date was subtle, yet effective, and it involved moving every single object in the house an inch or two to the left every single day until Sasuke noticed.

Q... Quiet - What are some things that they do that renders you speechless?

When the Sea breeze rustles his hair, salt flooding the air around the two of you, so dense you can practically taste it on the tip of your tongue. When he stares into the coastline, his frigid fingers weaved with your own, his eyes shining with unvoiced desire and hopefulness you’ve never seen directed at anything but yourself before. You can’t do anything but admire your lover as he has such an intimate moment with the sea, all you can do is stand witness to their holy matrimony.

R... Rapt - What part of you did they notice first?

It’s hard for Sasuke to remember his first time meeting you- you were only kids, after all, but the thing he appreciates the most about you is your honesty. He adores your sheer transparency about every topic, and your calm stature when faced with problems that may be even too big for you to handle.

S... Sour - What kind of candy do they like to share with you?

Sasuke loves bitter things, which you always joked was perfect for such a bitter man. Dark chocolate was a must-have in the (Last Name)-Uchiha household.

T... Truce - What’s one thing the two of you will never agree on?

Sasuke prefers sleeping on the left side of the bed, while you also prefer the left. The middle ground is sleeping on top of each other, of course, but after a few too many mornings waking up with kinks in your neck, you’ve collectively decided it was a battle neither of you could win.

U... Unconscious - What’s something they do around you without realizing it?

Sasuke has a bad habit of laying his hand on your thigh and mindlessly rubbing circles into it, his mind a thousand miles away and definitely not paying attention to the flush that carried from the tips of your ears down to your knees.

V... Vulnerable - What’s a topic that you should never bring up with them?

Naruto. Never speak of the man if you want your lover to speak to you for the rest of the month. Sasuke is very vocal about his dislikes for the two of you being on good terms. His reasons aren’t as shallow as you would think, though, he’s just worried that you’ll see something in Naruto that Sasuke just can’t compare to. For one thing, Naruto felt *alive*, his aura so welcoming and inviting that Sasuke simply couldn’t compare if his lover did leave him for his friend. ( Which - To clarify wouldn’t happen in a thousand years, but the poor man still worries. )

W... Weightless - What’s the happiest they’ve ever been around you?

Sasuke has honestly lost count of all the times that you’ve made him happy- for one thing, every morning that he wakes up to your relaxed face, his gaze softens and he runs a calloused thumb across your cheek, waking you up softly and with a tooth-rottingly sweet kiss.

X... Xanax- How do you calm them down?

When Sasuke is really, really, really mad, there’s no stopping him, but when he’s just plain angry, a careful hand slipped into his own and comforting words whispered in his ear calms him down almost immediately.

Y... Yearning - How often do they find themself thinking about you?

Sasuke has much more important things to do than think of his partner- is what he would say, if that wasn’t the biggest, fattest lie he’d ever tell. You never leave his mind, whenever he’s out in public without you he’s always daydreaming about what it would be like if you were here with him. Even if he appears present in the moment, his mind is a million miles away.

Z... Zzz - Do they fall asleep easily?

Sasuke has a hard time falling asleep on his own, but with you wrapped in his arms, he sleeps like a little kid. There's just something so relaxing about feeling your chest rise and fall in time with his own, his senses being filled with nothing but you, and knowing that you’re his and not going anywhere.

#sasuke x reader #sasuke uchiha #naruto #naruto x reader #fluff alphabet #fluff

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fangirlovestuff · 4 years ago

Text

Queer Eye - Chris Evans x bi!female!reader

a/n- Hey lovely people! Sorry if this has any mistakes, I really wanted to post it today and I didn’t have time to properly proofread it. buckle up, it’s a pretty long one :) Enjoy! <3

Summary: Your life is pretty entangled with the Evans brothers’. You and Scott get bored in quarantine and decide Chris needs a makeover - Queer eye style. The result? see for yourself...

Word count: ~6k

Warnings: language, very brief mentions of homophobia if you squint

Freshman Year

The halls looked daunting as you wandered them in search of room 105 for your first class of the day, clutching your book in hand. You knew that a new school meant new opportunities, new people, and you tried to get excited about it, you really did. The people in your last school… let's just say they weren't extremely accepting, which is part of the reason you moved. So, you were looking forward to a new start in the seemingly friendly Boston suburb.

Simultaneously, it was absolutely terrifying. From the start you've made a pact with yourself – no one should know you're bi. Your sexuality is none of their business. You couldn't risk this move because you wanted a girlfriend. Boys gotta be enough for now. You contorted your face as you passed a group of boys in the hall, trying to act "cool". Well, you hoped there were some less pretentious boys around here.

You looked at the doors to your right and left in an attempt to find the room you were looking for. 108,107,106—

You collided with someone and dropped your book. Of course, why wouldn't this happen, you thought, an exasperated sigh threatening to fall from your lips. You bent down to pick up your book, and your hand brushed the other hand that reached out to grab the book. You looked up to see a pair of pretty green-blue eyes staring back at you. You couldn't believe this cliché was actually happening to you. Right now. In real life. But hey, he was pretty cute, so there was that.

"I'm so sorry," the guy said, smiling awkwardly as you picked up your book.

"It's alright," you sent a tight-lipped smile his way. You both stood there for a couple of seconds until he finally spoke.

"I'm Scott, by the way," he smiled, "Sorry, again, for bumping into you. I haven’t seen you around, are you new here?"

"Are you saying you know everyone who goes to this school?" you shot back incredulously. "But yeah, I'm new here," you introduced yourself quickly.

"Well, nice to meet you. And to answer your question, I'm pretty sure I know everyone by their faces at least," Scott replied and you chuckled in response.

"Ummm… I was just on my way to 105 actually, so I should probably go. It was nice meeting you Scott," you smiled and you parted ways.

In the second period, you had chemistry lab, and you were early. You sat down at a desk, zoning out for a while before everyone came in. Scott was actually pretty cute, you realized. Maybe you two can have something. Just as you were thinking that Scott came into the class. Speaking of the devil.

He waved at you and came your way, putting his bag down and sitting down next to you. "I assume this seat isn’t taken," he smiled.

"Yeah." You laughed. "So, we're gonna be lab partners now?"

"Well, I figured as a way to pay you back for running into you I could offer my chemistry expertise," he smiled. "Just kidding, I kinda suck at chemistry. But I'd still love to be your lab partner, if you're okay with it," he added bashfully.

"Yeah, cool," you smiled at him and then silenced because the lesson was starting.

By lunch, it was clear you were already Scott's friend. You sat down with him, laughing about the disaster that was chemistry class a few hours ago.

"Honestly Scott, if you suck at chem so bad, why did you even take it?"

"I don't really know. It's just pretty much the only class that worked with the theatre schedule. Except for physics," he scrunched up his nose. "If you think me in chemistry was bad, wait till you see me trying to grapple with physics."

"I can confirm that's not a pleasant sight," said Scott's friend, who just sat down at the table. One by one, Scott's friends filled the table and he introduced all of you.

"So wait, you do theatre?" you asked Scott, intrigued.

"Yeah," Scott replied. "My big brother does it too, so honestly that's what got me into it, but it’s actually fun," he smiled. "Would you wanna join?"

"No thanks, not really the theatre person," you smiled back. "But maybe I'd come to a show sometimes."

Over lunch, you got to know Scott's friends, who became yours, and all in all - you were very glad you moved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sophomore Year

You and Scott's chemistry together paid off at the end. You entered your boyfriend's room and turned around to face him.

"What do you wanna watch?" Scott asked, going past you and plopping down on his bed, patting the spot next to him. You sat down next to him and cuddled into his side.

"Pick whatever you want babe," you smiled at him affectionately.

You were halfway into the movie when a pretty boring part came on. You looked at Scott to find him already staring at you. You and Scott were taking it slow, and you hadn't even kissed yet. You licked your lips. Scott reached his head and captured your lips in his. It was tentative and slow, and you parted from each other smiling. You looked into Scott's eyes. He seemed uncertain. Maybe it was just his first kiss altogether. You sent him a reassuring smile and reached to cup the side of his face. He smiled back at you; the movie long forgotten.

And at that moment exactly, his annoying older brother decided to barge into the room. Well, annoying may be a bit of a harsh judgment because even after a year of knowing Scott you didn't really know Chris. But right now, you were definitely annoyed. You removed your hand from Scott's face, who was blushing.

"Scott, did you remember it's your turn to—" Chris started and then noticed the embarrassed state you were both in. "Nevermind," he said awkwardly and left the room, closing the door after him.

"He doesn't know how to knock, does he?" you asked sarcastically.

"Guess not," Scott chuckled. You cuddled back into his side. You weren't gonna let that abrupt interruption ruin your date.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The End of Sophomore Year

Scott and you were hanging out on his couch, playing a board game when Chris came down the stairs in a hurry, his girlfriend right on his heels. "Ma, have you seen my jacket?"

He was going to his senior prom tonight. Honestly, you were kind of jealous – finally finishing high school seemed so far away from you, and here he was not really having to step foot in a school ever again. But it's not like you were having a terrible time at school; with Scott as your boyfriend and the many friends you had made, you were happy.

They finally left and the house was quiet once more after the bustle of sending Chris off to enjoy his prom. You and Scott continued with your date night, wondering what's it like at senior prom. Even though you were both only two years younger than Chris, he still seemed miles ahead of you.

Later that night you went into the kitchen to get yourself some water. When you entered you saw Chris sitting there alone, glooming. When he heard you come in, he hurriedly stood up and leaned his back against the near countertop.

"Hey," you said as you filled yourself a glass of water. "What are you doing here? Weren't you supposed to go with-- "

"She dumped me." He cut you off before you could finish your sentence. Your eyebrows furrowed and you came to lean on the counter next to him.

"That sucks," you said softly. You didn't know what else to say, so you just stood there silently for a moment until he spoke up.

"It does. One moment we were talking about what we're gonna do after school and how I'm gonna be going to NYC to intern and the next she's telling me it won't work between us," Chris took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry," you replied hesitantly. "But hey, think about it this way," you started talking dramatically, "when you'll be a famous actor and she'll come up to you asking for an autograph you could just ignore her. Or if she says she knows you you'll just say you've never met this woman in your life. The ultimate payback," you smiled at him.

"Yeah, I guess," he smiled back sadly.

"Also," you nudged his shoulder with yours, "I would never dump Scott on our prom night. That's a promise," you smiled.

"That's great," He chuckled. You quietly moved away from him, setting your glass back on the counter. "Thanks," he added suddenly.

"Sure," you sent him one last smile and left the kitchen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Senior prom

Lisa was taking pictures of you and Scott as you both posed with bright smiles on your faces.

"Alright, we gotta leave ma," Scott said and kissed her cheek.

"Have fun kids!" she told you as you hurriedly left in order to not be late.

You were having a great time at prom. You danced with your friends, with Scott. After a couple of hours, you were getting a little tired, so you pulled Scott aside.

"Come on, let's go get some air," you said as you pulled him outside.

Once you were outside you and Scott walked to the back of the building, where no one else was in sight. You both leaned against the wall and looked at the night sky above. You looked to find Scott already looking at you, and automatically leaned in to kiss him. You wrapped your arms around his neck and he put his around your waist as you deepened the kiss. It was getting more and more heated until—

"I can't do this," Scott said breathily and suddenly pulled away from you. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he started pacing back and forth in front of you.

"Scott, what's going on?" you asked concerned.

He continued pacing. "I know what prom night could mean for some couples and—"

"I don't care about that," you cut him off, grabbing his arm so he'd stop walking. "Scott, it's okay. You know I would never wanna do anything we're not both ready for. It really—"

"But that's the thing!" he said, surprisingly loud. "That's the thing," he said once more, quieter this time. "I don't think I'm ever going to be ready for this. I-" he took a deep breath, "I'm gay."

A heavy silence settled between you for a few moments, and then he said, "I'm so sorry, I-"

"Don't ever apologize for being who you are," you put your hands on his shoulders and looked into his eyes. You took a deep breath. "I guess I should tell you this as well- I'm bisexual." You smiled and he smiled back.

"I'm glad you told me," he said.

"So the entire time…" you trailed off, your smile fading from your face.

"I'm sorry," Scott said again. "At first I really thought I was feeling the way I should about you. But I realized that's not the case. I love you, so much. But not in the way I led you to believe I do. I had an entire speech but honestly, I forgot it." he smiled hesitantly.

"I love you too Scott," you smiled once more. "But I just need some time to figure it out."

"Of course. Whatever you want."

"Actually, let's get outta here. I could go for ice cream," you smiled.

"Yeah, sure," Scott smiled.

On the way there you remembered something important. "Oh, Scott, does this count as you breaking up with me or me with you?"

"Me with you, I guess. Why?" he looked over at you with a puzzled look.

"I promised Chris I won't dump you on prom night," you smiled and he laughed.

You needed time to figure out how you felt about Scott, but it was going to be okay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spring Break - Sophomore Year of College

"Scott!" you yelled as you marched up the stairs, two at a time. "We're gonna be late because of you!"

It was a bright Saturday morning and you'd just arrived at the Evan's residence a couple on minutes ago, saying a quick hello to everyone and then jumping up the stairs to get Scott. They were having a huge family barbeque for the birth of… well, you were pretty sure it was Scott's cousin's daughter, but you couldn't fully remember. Since you were on your spring break from college, they invited you to come with them, an invitation you gladly accepted.

At this point, you and Scott were best friends. It took a while to get over the whole "I dated you for like 2 years even though I don't like girls" thing, but you were out of high school and those events seemed far behind you. You didn't want to lose Scott – you loved him, just obviously not in a romantic way. Also, he had wonderful taste in guys, and if they were straight, he knew where to direct them, which was a definite bonus every time you went out together. All jokes aside, Scott was an amazing person and your best friend in the whole entire world, so you were basically a family member in the already big Evans family.

And that leads us back to today, with you knocking on Scott's door furiously. "Scott, seriously man, we gotta go!"

"I'm coming! Jeez, calm down," he said as he opened the door and gave you a quick hug.

"Hi," you smiled and hugged him back.

"Hey," he smiled back. "Come on, let's go."

Who has a barbeque on such a hot day? That was the first thought that came to mind when you all sat down on the grass of the large yard. The sun was shining high and bright, seeing as it was noon, and you haven't even been outside for two minutes but you've already started sweating.

However, you didn't regret coming at all. The food was great and the company was even better. You were in the middle of talking to Scott and some of his cousins when you heard a yelp from across the yard.

"We got you uncle Chris!" screamed two toddlers with water guns in their hands. You recognized them as the older brother and sister of the newborn you were here to celebrate.

Chris blinked the water away from his eyes for a few seconds. "You did," he smiled and said once the surprise had worn off. His white shirt was nearly transparent as a result of the "attack", and it clung to his torso nicely while he got up and put the plate he was holding aside.

Wait, backtrack for a sec – clung to him nicely? since when did you think about Chris' torso as nice? As a matter of fact, since when did you pay attention to Chris' torso at all?

Your eyes wandered over to Chris once more, skimming over his surprisingly toned muscles, and holy crap when did he start working out?

This was… an interesting change indeed. But hey, it's not like it's going to affect anything – he was your ex-boyfriend-who-turned-out-to-be-gay-and-is-now-your-best-friend's brother, so nothing was going to happen. You were quite sure this won't be a problem. Like 97% sure. If he started working out that's good for him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Present day

Your eyes were filled with tears as you reached for the bowl of popcorn that was resting on Scott's lap. The blinds were closed "for cinematic effect" and the light of the TV reflected on Scott's face. When you looked at him you saw he was in the same emotional state you were in, which is typical for a Queer Eye binge like the one that was in full swing right now. You and Scott were avid Queer Eye fans, and you thought quarantine was a good chance to re-watch it, together with the new season.

"Still doing that?" Chris barged into the living room after he took Dodger out for his afternoon walk. Chris watched it once, but couldn't understand why you and Scott enjoyed watching it again so much.

"Got anything better for us to do?" you quipped back as Dodger jumped on the sofa and curled down beside you. You stroked his head as Chris walked out, yelling, "Help me make dinner!"

After a moment Scott spoke. "We should probably go help him," he said, pausing the episode.

"Fine," you huffed.

"So, what are we making today?" you asked as Scott and you stepped into the kitchen. "Please be Lisa's pasta, please be Lisa's pasta…" you staged whispered.

"We literally had it two days ago," Scott pointed out. "Besides, none of us can make it as good as she does."

"I guess," you sighed. "So what are we doing?"

Chris, Scott, and you had agreed you would use the time on your hands in quarantine to learn to cook better. Honestly, between the three of you, you were probably the best cook, but you definitely needed some help as well.

"I found this pizza recipe online that I wanted to try," Chris explained as he started to pull the ingredients out of the cupboards.

"Well, pizza it is!" you announced as you put on an apron, and quickly the three of you started working.

You were all sitting around the dinner table, eating your pizzas, and making conversation with each other. That is until you got stuck with a silence that was… a bit uncomfortable. Being around each other all day every day certainly takes its toll on the range of your conversation topics.

"So," Scott spoke up after a few moments, "How was… your day?"

You all cringed at his question. You groaned. "Come on Scott, we're all adults. We can admit it – quarantine's boring as fuck."

"Yup," Chris agreed.

"Well what do you want me to do about it? It's not my fault we've been in lockdown for like, a year," Scott said defensively.

"It's literally been two months," you deadpanned, "but we should find something to do," you mused out loud. "Like, pick up a hobby or something."

"Oh, you mean other than sitting on the couch all day watching Queer Eye?" Chris quipped.

"I wish the fab 5 could come to our house right now," you sighed, "it would definitely make things more interesting around here."

"First of all, that's my house, I'm just letting you two crash cause I'm nice like that," Chris replied. "And second of all, the fab 5 help people who actually need it."

"You're letting us crash because it'd be boring without us," you stated matter-of-factly. "And I guess the straight guys of the world are indeed in a gloomier state than ours, aren’t they Scott?"

"They probably are," he agreed. "But aren't we forgetting the straight guy in the room?" he looks at Chris amusedly.

"Well, I guess he could use some help. You know Scott, we were just looking for a quarantine project, and we have a straight guy and two fabulous queers, which is better than none…" you trailed off and smirked.

"Huh," Scott smiled, "I like where you're going with this."

"I, for one, really don't like where this is going," Chris stated as he took his empty plate to the sink.

"So it's settled then," you smiled at Scott, "Chris is getting a makeover, Queer Eye style."

"No," Chris groans.

"Oh come on Chris," Scott said, "Don't pretend you're not also super bored. We get occupation and you get an awesome makeover, no one's bored anymore. Everyone wins!"

Chris's tongue darts out to wet his lips as he pretends to contemplate the suggestion. In actuality, he knows he's outnumbered.

"Fine," he rolls his eyes, "whatever makes you kids happy."

"We're two years younger than you, for Christ's sake!" you exclaimed. You turn to Scott. "So, I think we should start planning the Bobby section. I'd love to get some—"

"Nope, nope nopety nope," Chris pops the p's. "You are absolutely not touching my house."

"As much as I hate to admit it, we should probably leave his house alone," Scott said. "Besides, we're only two people anyway."

"Fine," you rolled your eyes and pouted a little for good measure. "We won't touch your house, Chris."

"Great," he smiles at your antics. "See ya in the morning."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day you barge into Chris' room unannounced. "Chris, you have to see this video of—"

Your words get stuck in your throat as you process the sight of a half-naked Chris in front of you, looking into his closet, presumably in search of a shirt. From where you're standing you can only see his back, and you can't help but appreciate the toned muscles.

Chris finally pulls out a blue t-shirt and puts it on. Unfortunately. "Video of what?" he asks.

You shake from your thoughts and turn to your phone in your hand. "These two dogs are…"

You explain and show Chris the video and he laughs while your thoughts are somewhere else completely. For the last nearly two decades, you've had a bit of a thing for Chris. It didn't really bother you most of the time. You've dated other people, and you didn't even see Chris that much. You were friends, even good ones, case in point – you felt very comfortable barging into his room whenever you felt like it. But your little celebrity crush was pretty much always in the back of your mind.

Now that you were living with Chris, ignoring your feelings proves a little more difficult.

"What are you two laughing about?" Scott entered the room.

"This video," you said and showed him.

"Alright," he smiled after he finished watching it. "We are officially starting…" he paused for dramatic effect, "Antoni day!"

You cheered while Chris looked puzzled. "He's the one who cooks, right?"

"Indeed he is, Chris," you said, "ten points to… whatever house you're on. Did you even read Harry Potter?"

"If I did, I surely don't remember it."

"That's just further proof you need our help," you said and he shrugged.

"So, I think we should pick three courses for Chris to make and he'll need to make them throughout the day," you suggested.

"Sounds good to me," Chris said and Scott agreed, "but what will you two be doing while I cook?" he asked.

"Planning the rest of the days of course," Scott said. "Also, taking Dodger on his walk, so you have nothing to worry about it," he smiled at Chris and raised his eyebrows.

"Dammit," Chris cursed under his breath, "You're really not letting me leave the kitchen until I finish cooking, are you?"

"Yep," you nodded and beamed.

You and Scott picked your 3 dishes: lasagna, fried chicken breast, and some cake.

"The point is that you learn things to actually embrace in real life, so we didn't over-complicate it," Scott explained to Chris.

You and Scott spent the day devising a plan for what else you wanted to do while Chris worked in the kitchen. So far nothing seemed to be on fire, so that was great.

For lunch you had the chicken, that was actually not that bad and for dinner, you had the lasagna and cake, which were actually pretty great.

"I think we can crown this day as a success," you said and Scott agreed.

"Now that we know you can cook, maybe you should do that more often," you smirked.

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Chris retorted.

"Just wait, till the end of the week, you'll have some more confidence, a whole new look and like… what else do they help people find?" you mused. "A girlfriend! We should sign you up for Zoom speed-dating," you grinned and reached for your phone.

"Oh god, that sounds terrible," Chris chuckled. "Thankfully, I don't think that's a thing."

You lifted your eyes from your phone. "Pretty sure you're right, which is a shame. You got out of it for now," you smiled.

Little did you know, by the end of the week only one out of the three things you predicted was going to come true.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day you were sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of tea when Chris came down and into the kitchen.

"Good morning!" you cheerfully greeted and he hummed back in response, clearly still groggy. You ignored his attitude and continued talking. "Today is gonna be Jonathan day, so get ready soon because Scott and I are starting to go through your bathroom in about… ten minutes," you smirked.

"Wonderful," he sighed.

About half an hour later you and Scott were finally going through Chris's stuff in the bathroom that adjoins to his bedroom. Officially it was to see his grooming routine but unofficially you were both nosy.

"Oh my god Chris, do you ever tidy? I'm pretty sure there are expired plasters in here," you yelled to Chris who was sitting on his bed.

"Plasters don't have an expiration date," he replied.

"Yes, they do!" you yelled incredulously.

Evert few minutes you or Scott would show Chris something you thought he should throw away.

"Oh yeah I got that as a present and never threw it away"

"God, I have no idea when's the last time I used that"

"Someone recommended it"

"Oh, what's that?"

In short, Chris had plenty of excuses, but he had a ton of junk in his cabinets. It took the entire morning just to clear them up, and you were left with very few, mostly necessary things. You and Scott plopped down on Chris's bed next to Chris who was on his phone.

"This was supposed to be Queer Eye, not the Marie Kondo show," you nearly whined.

"Hey, you were the ones who wanted something to do," Chris shrugged.

Scott was the one to get up first. "Well, the day's not over yet. Let's go Chris, this is the part where I do whatever I want with your hair," he raised his brow.

"Whatever you want?" Chris asked, slightly alarmed yet amused.

"Whatever I want," Scott confirmed. "But don't worry, I won't do anything too extreme. Gotta keep you looking good for the Zoom speed dating," he chuckled and went into the bathroom.

"We already said that wasn't a thing!" Chris yelled after Scott and followed him into the bathroom with you in tow.

"What about me?" you said once you reached the bathroom. "Shouldn't I advise? As a member of the female species, a species that undoubtedly spends much more time looking at Chris than he does, I think I deserve to voice an opinion."

"Valid argument," Scott agreed. "I was planning to give him a buzzcut and maybe a shave. Opinions?"

"No! his hair looks way better long! And I don't think he really wants to shave but that's just me looking out for Chris," you patted Chris' head as you said the last part and he laughed.

After you and Scott argued for a bit you reached a compromise – the beard stays, the hair goes.

"Don't worry, it'll grow back," Chris comforted you sarcastically and patted your head. You rolled your eyes at him and left him and Scott to do the actual work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were enjoying the bright morning sun streaming through the window and humming along to the music from your earbuds as you checked your phone. You started dancing around, you singing getting stronger and stronger. "She's a killer, queeeeee—"

Chris came into your room and you stopped abruptly. "Morning Chris," you greeted, faking calm.

"Good morning to you too," he said with a shit-eating grin on his face that told you he saw you dancing around.

You swatted his arm. "And why are you barging into my room this lovely morning?"

"First of all, what goes around comes around," he chuckled. "Second of all, Scott wanted to tell you he wanted to do Karamo day on his own so you can do whatever you want."

"Okay," you frowned slightly. Initially, you and Scott had agreed to dedicate this day to search positive-but-not-too-positive comments about Chris to raise his morale, but plans change apparently. "Have fun then," you added.

"Thanks," Chris gave you a small smile and left the room.

Since you had the day to yourself you made the best of it. You spent the morning attending some work stuff, with some play intervals with Dodger of course. You decided you were gonna make lunch for all of you, so you went to Chris' room, where you assumed the boys were, to ask them what do they want.

"Come on Scott, stop being ridiculous," you heard Chris's voice from outside the closed door. "You know she doesn't feel that way about me, drop it."

You knocked on the door as if you weren't just standing there and eavesdropping. "Boys, I'm making lunch!" you called through the door, "anything you want?"

"Not really," they both replied.

"Well, I'm making grilled cheese, be down in ten!"

So, Chris had a crush. Good for him. But if Scott wanted this day to be about talking to Chris about his crush, you still didn't understand why that couldn't include you. Usually, you and Scott talked about boys together, and you often talked to him about girls. So as the one of you who actually likes girls, wouldn't it be more beneficial to have you there?

Well, whatever. Maybe it's an embarrassing crush or something, you thought and went on to prepare lunch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Good morning!" Scott barged into your room this time.

"God, do you people not get personal boundaries?" you groaned from your bed.

"This is the first time I've barged into your room probably in a month. And it's a special day," you could hear Scott's smirk in his words and you smiled as well.

"It's Tan day!" you both exclaimed and laughed.

"I've been waiting for this one," you laughed.

You got up and brushed your teeth quickly while Scott went to wake Chris up. You made your way to Chris' room to catch up to them.

You could hear them talking from the hallway. "Ready to face the music?" you heard Scott ask and came in.

"Don't scare him Scott," you said, amused, "it's just us watching the fashion show," you chuckled.

"Yeah, that," Chris said.

You all went to get some breakfast, where you explained to Chris what you were going to do today.

"So, since we can't exactly take you shopping, you're going to shop in Scott's closet," you said while you chewed on your cereal. "You guys are pretty much the same size, so that should work."

Alas, as it turned out, it did not work.

"Scott, if I move in this shirt my shoulders will definitely tear it," Chris complained as he stood uncomfortably in front of the mirror in Scott's room.

You and Scott were doubling over in laughter at how close the shirt looked to bursting and how uncomfortable Chris looked in it. But honestly, it was kinda hot. Broad shoulders and all. But also, very funny.

"Okay, new plan," you said once you finished laughing and Chris changed back into his own shirt. "You're gonna shop your own closet for new outfits."

You all went to Chris' room, where you and Scott immediately started to go through his clothes and putting together a few outfits. Chris tried each of them on. Some were ridiculous and the colors clashed, but some of them were offered seriously and were, as Chris said, "actually kinda nice."

After a few hours of this, you all got tired of it and plopped down on the bed.

"I have a challenge for you now," Chris said. "Each of you needs to put together an outfit from my closet."

"Easy peasy," Scott replied. You took a little more time to contemplate it, but then a red belt caught your eye and reminded you of a pair of red heels you owned. "Got it!" you exclaimed. You picked out the belt and a black dress shirt and went to your room to change.

You put on the shirt, which as you predicted was long enough to cover your butt, and buttoned it, leaving the few top buttons unbuttoned. You added the red belt to cinch in your waist, the red heels, and a gold bracelet, fixing your hair a bit to complete the outfit. Once you were satisfied with the result you went to show Chris and Scott the final product.

"So, did I do well?" you beamed and spun around to show off your success.

"Damn! You did great!" Scott said, always your hype man.

You winked at him in response and sent a questioning look to Chris, who stayed silent the entire time. He shook from his frozen state, "It's fine, I guess," he smiled wryly. You flashed a toothy grin back at him and went to get back into your normal clothes.

Sitting at the dinner table with Chris and Scott, you all talked about what you should do next when the thought hit you. "Wait, in Queer Eye they have, like, a big emotional moment at the end of the week where they showcase their development and everything they've learned and we didn't have one!" you said, cutting into something Chris was saying.

"Well, I think we should leave that up to Chris," Scott said and sent Chris a look. "I'm sure he can find an idea."

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Chris shrugged and rolled his eyes at Scott.

Later that night you were all laying on the couch, your back against Scott's chest, watching Hamilton when Scott suddenly spoke up. "I'm really tired so I'm gonna go hit the sack," he pushed you away from his chest and got up from the couch. You looked at the clock and frowned; it was only 10 pm.

"Goodnight Scott," you said. He smiled and went upstairs.

You leaned back in your sit but since Scott wasn't there anymore your back was at a very awkward angle. Chris saw you and chuckled. You took your tongue out at him and straightened your back against the sofa. For the next couple of minutes, you twisted and turned trying to find a way for the couch to be as comfortable as Scott, but it just wasn't happening.

"You alright there?" Chris asked, clearly amused.

You huffed. "Scott was way more comfortable than this couch."

He laughed softly. "Well I'm not Scott but we could give it a try," he extended his open arms to you.

You didn't really think twice about it before you snuggled up against his back. He wrapped his arms around you and you were engulfed by his warmth, and suddenly you remembered that cuddling with someone you're trying to hide your crush from isn't the greatest idea.

"I know what Scott expected me to do for the end of the week, I'm just not sure how well it'll go," Chris said out of the blue.

"What is it?" you asked, intrigued.

"I could just do it right now and show you," Chris said and you nodded for him to continue, facing him in his arms.

He smiled hesitantly before closing the distance between you and capturing your lips with his own and cupping your cheek in his hand. You froze for a second until your instincts kicked back in and you kissed him back passionately, your hands wrapping around his neck while you, albeit awkwardly, turned to straddle his lap. When you two broke apart Chris spoke. "Scott thought I should ask the girl I like out," he said breathily. "So what do you say? Dinner when restaurants open again?" he smiled shyly.

"Yes, that sounds great. But I feel like this," you gestured at the TV, which was still playing, "has some date potential."

"I'll go get some ice cream," Chris said.

For the rest of the night, you had your living room date, having deep conversations about life and giggling and then shushing each other so Scott won't wake up.

And for the rest of your lives? That's a story for another time.

hope you enjoyed! i might repost this soon if i find enough mistakes in this lol

Chris Taglist: @swatson06 @horny-nd-bored @shannon124 @perfectlyharolds @phoebe-21-99 @wintersoldierslut @iceebabies @wanessalopesueiros @sleepingpapermouse @steverogerswasalwaysworthy @holtzkinnon @angelicl-y @stydia-4-ever @thatoneperson5000 @fangirlfree @kaitcordx25 @bequeening @steve-barry-damon-logan @itscrazycherryblossomcollection @hollandxmarvel @darkwitchfromthesouth

if you wanna join / be removed from the taglist, comment/message me! this is a taglist for Chris and his characters. much love <3

#chris evans x reader #chris evans #chris evans fluff #chris evans imagine #scott evans #scott evans x reader

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husbandograveyard · 4 years ago

Note

Eeeee so excited to see your alphabet requests! 😍 congrats one the followers, honey! Could I get B, K, and O for Kid and then X and Y for Killer? I hope I followed the rules correctly! 💕

Coop! A fanfiction kween in my inbox! Thank youuuuu (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ You sparked my interest in this tulip gremlin and his masked friend, and now they are amongst my absolute favorites to write for! ;D Hope you enjoy these, have a wonderful day love!!!

Fluff Alphabet - Kid: B, K, O - Killer: X, Y

2nd person. Female reader.

Kid - B, K, O

B - beauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Kid does not really care about physical appearances as much as character. He falls in love with you as a person, not with your appearance. However, once this man is in love, he’ll feel like you are the most beautiful creature that has ever existed. Any insecurity you might express, he’ll aggressively rebuke. Scars? Cool, you’re tough, he likes that. Think you’re too thin, not curvy enough, or maybe too curvy or heavy? He’ll show you how much he loves your body through actions. Insecure about the color of your eyes/hair? He’ll tell you it’s the prettiest fucking color he’s ever seen. He’s never very tactful about it, but extremely sincere, sometimes even getting upset if you cannot see how beautiful you are to him.

What he admires in you, is your strength. Your patience. Your ability to keep up with his crew. And your ability to keep up with him, mood swings, temper tantrums and all. He loves that you are opinionated and not afraid to talk back, even when he’s angry. He loves that even though his crew is a bunch of misfits, you accept them all and care for them all equally, without a second thought. He fell for your personality in the first place and that’s what keeps him attracted, no matter what you look like or whatever phases your body may go through. His goal is to be pirate king, but now he’s found a queen to be on his side.

K - kiss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Kid is … rough, to say it nicely. His kisses are needy, full of lust, leaving you gasping for more and often accompanied by hands eagerly roaming your body. Experienced or not, he is cocky and confident, often grinning in his kisses, happy when he notices that you’re already panting and ready for more after a little time. He will leave your lips swollen and bruised more than often, will not accept being dominated, but he secretly likes it when you try, it’s not like you can win anyway. Bites are not unusual either, but he won’t do that too often, he never intends to actually hurt you or scare you away, but it’s a fine line, and Kid likes to explore and push boundaries.

The very first kiss takes a while to happen. Kid does not really believe in relationships or needing physical affection, seeing it more as a means to an end and to provide some relief for his most primeval desires, and will take a while to give in to his feelings when there’s something else mixed in: love. You’ll have to push him a bit, letting him know you’re not here to toy with him, you’re in for the long haul and you’re prepared to stick around through bad and worse. Chances are you will actually have to initiate. But once you break that thin seal of carefulness and holding back, the beast is released and we’re back to the beginning. The first kiss is tender for about two seconds before he gets rough. Never turning back. His kisses are more tender when he’s sleepy or drowsy, but don’t tell anyone.

O - on Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Eustass ‘Captain’ Kid does not fall in love easily. As said above, he’s all for there for some physical relief, but actual love, it takes one hella special person (you) to change his mind. When he finally gives in, boy, are you in for a ride. He is possessive and jealous, so in that way, he’s super vocal. You are his and his alone. You chose him and you should have been well aware of what that meant.

Kid is not really tender, or sweet, but there are these subtle differences in how he behaves around you compared to the rest of the crew. Arguments will be de-escalated easier, he seems to have less of a temper whenever you are near, especially if you’re sitting on his lap or holding him in any way. In fact, once the crew notices this, they take over as many chores as possible from you so you can spend more time with Kid, that way he’s more pleasant for everyone to be around with.

Kid expresses his feelings through various compliments, albeit a little crude, and is not afraid to state things in front of an audience. Praises for how well you fight and such will be a frequent occurrence, often accompanied by a “That’s my girl”. He’s not above smacking your ass in public and will often have an arm around you if he doesn’t need them to fight or do something else.

Killer - X, Y

X - XOXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Killer is more affectionate and way more gentle than his captain is in a relationship, but it takes him some time to warm up to the whole affection idea. The main hurdle being his mask of course.

Cuddles can be initiated pretty early on in the relationship, especially in private. Curling up in his big, strong arms is something that quickly became your favorite hobby. Killer likes it when you drag your nails over his muscles while you cuddle. The best cuddle times are right before bedtime and right after you wake up. There’s something intimate about being asleep near each other, after all, you’re both at your most vulnerable then, and just sharing the moment with love. Kissing is more of a hurdle. The mask is in his way. You don’t mind kissing his mask, neck, shoulders, arms, anything else, but you will hint that you’d like to have some of the affections returned. However, you don’t push him and let him do everything at his own pace. The first time he takes his mask off is at night, too dark for you to see anything, but you don’t mind. It gets better and easier for him to do over time, and especially when it is just the two of you and the mask is off, Killer can get quite affectionate.

Y - yearning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

Killer will prefer having a partner that’s also part of the crew. That way he won’t have to miss you too often, and he won’t have to worry about you while he’s gone. Kid can be impulsive sometimes when it comes to choosing the next island and he doesn’t like not knowing when he’ll see you again. He’s not one for letters either, but if you want to send them, he’ll cherish every single one of them and keep them somewhere safe and out of reach of Kid.

But, as said before, he’d prefer to have someone on the crew, that way he won’t have to deal with a lot of missing, besides on some missions, but those usually only take a few days, tops. Those days he will just overwork himself a little (not that that’s hard, Kid will always have something for him to do), just to keep his mind off of things. He’s independent and miles above sulking because he misses someone, but he cannot deny that going to bed without your figure to hold, or waking up without a sincere ‘good morning babe’ does feel a little weird. He’ll deny the missing, but will catch himself grabbing supplies for two, or doing things that are now ingrained in his routine because of you, even when they’re unnecessary.

#Killer #Kid #killer x reader #Kid x reader #Massacre soldier killer #Eustass kid #Eustass kid x reader #fluff alphabet #One piece #one piece writing #one piece headcanon #one piece x reader #headcanon #reader insert #request #100 followers event #doctorgerth

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toxoiddiamond · 4 years ago

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EPHRAIM SAMUEL DAVIES Do they know when to give up? Ephraim doesn’t know the meaning of the words “give up.” He is persistent to a fault and doesn’t believe in picking his battles. He picks all the battles. What is the funniest thing that ever happened to them when they were a child? Honestly, I don’t have much of an answer for this. Ephraim doesn’t have many memories of his childhood in general, and he didn’t have any family around to tell him funny/cute stories about when he was little or anything. If he was pressed for an answer, he would probably say the funniest thing he remembers happening to him was when his brother played a prank on him by offering a glass of orange juice that was actually water mixed with mac and cheese powder. Have they ever kept someone in their life who they didn’t get along with — for example, a friend they disliked or argued with? Why did they avoid saying goodbye? Normally, Ephraim isn’t one to keep anyone in his life that he doesn’t like or get along with. The only exception he ever made was his older brother. His brother was the only family he had, and though they didn’t get along (mainly due to the fact that his brother was heavily addicted to drugs), Ephraim could never bring himself to completely sever the ties between them. He tried to get his brother the help he needed, tried to get him into rehab, but he never succeeded, and unfortunately, his brother ended up dying of an overdose at the age of thirty-seven. What would they do if someone brought up their biggest insecurity in front of a crowd of strangers? He would be furious. He doesn’t appreciate being called out in any situation, so having his insecurities brought up in any group setting would set him off. Ephraim is pretty perceptive about people, able to guess/determine a lot about them even when he seemingly has very little to go off of, so he would likely fire back and emotionally eviscerate whoever tried to do this to him. He’d make them regret it, that’s for sure. Are they in a relationship? How many times have they been ‘in love’? How have these people influenced them? Currently he is not in a relationship, and he has had very few relationships in his life. He’s more the type to go pick someone up in a bar for a one night stand every once in a great while just to satisfy any sexual frustration, rather than deal with the hassle of actual relationships. He has never been in love, and he’s not sure he even believes in romantic love. Would they wish upon a falling star? Are there any superstitions they believe in or follow? Is a cracked mirror a sign of bad luck? Are there things they do to avoid bad luck? Not walking under a ladder? Avoiding the black cat? Ephraim prides himself on being a very logical person, not one to follow superstitions. He doesn’t believe in anything magical or supernatural, he doesn’t believe in god, and he doesn’t believe in luck. When he was younger, he used to say his prayers every night even though he didn’t really think anyone was listening, but the older he got, the less he prayed, and he’d grown out of it completely by the time he was in his twenties. What is the first thing they do in the morning? What do they do on a Sunday afternoon? What do they do on a Friday night? His first order of business every morning is to work out. Some mornings he goes for a run, but other days he goes to the gym, depending on what kind of workout he wants to do. If he skips his workout for any reason, he just feels completely off for the rest of the day. Most Sunday afternoons are spent working, whether at the office or at home. Friday nights are almost always spent at home, reading or maybe watching a show/movie that caught his interest. If they were moving to another country, but could only pack one carry-on sized bag, what would they pack? He doesn’t really have anything sentimental or valuable, so this would be easy for him. He’d just pack away some clothes, some basic hygiene items, his phone and charger, and his laptop. Tell a story about a lie they told that everybody still believes. Why did they lie and why haven’t they told the truth? Ephraim has lied plenty of times, and the thing is, he’s a good liar. He’s straight up lied in court in order to get the verdict he wants, and because he’s so convincing, it’s worked for him every time, and his lies have held up to scrutiny multiple times. He’s lied to people when they’ve asked him personal questions (nothing really major, he’s just lied about things like where he grew up or whether he has family, because he doesn’t want anyone to know too much about him), and those lies have never been questioned by anyone either. Write about their favourite street. He actually really likes the street where he currently works. His office is close to the top floor and at night he can see the city lights stretching out for miles. On the street below, there’s a few office buildings, then a bakery (Ephraim doesn’t have much of a sweet tooth, but he does indulge in a pastry from said bakery now and then), a couple of restaurants, and a small corner store where Ephraim often stops after work. During the day, it’s a very busy street, but after dark, once most people have left work for the day, it’s pretty quiet. If their job gave them a surprise three day paid break to rest and recuperate, what would they do with those three days? At first, he would be really unhappy about it. Working is his life, and he wouldn’t know what to do with himself for the first day or so. But after that, he would start to enjoy the downtime. Ephraim doesn’t realize how overworked he is, and how much he needs a break, but if he actually was to take some time off, it wouldn’t take him long to figure out that vacations are nice, actually, and he should take them more often. How late do they sleep in? Most days, he’s up at 5am sharp for his daily workout. If he doesn’t have to go into the office, then he might sleep in until 7am. Where did they grow up? Did they like it/do they miss it? He was born and raised in Eureka Springs, Arkansas, a tiny little town with a population of less than 3,000 people. He barely remembers it, and the few memories he has of that place are horrible. He doesn’t miss it, and he has no desire to ever go near it again. What are their phobias? For someone who projects such an air of confidence and stoicism, Ephraim has a lot of phobias. Break-ins are his biggest fear– he has multiple locks on his front door and he never leaves his windows open or unlocked at night. He doesn’t like people sneaking up on him or jumping out at him (that’s a surefire way to get punched in the face by him just on instinct), he doesn’t like the sight of blood, and he can’t stomach any horror movies that are based in reality (ghost movies are fine, slasher movies not so much). He’s distrustful of people in general and is always on his guard, which is exhausting for him. How would they break up with someone? Ephraim has only dated a small number of people, and none of the relationships lasted longer than a couple of months. He’s usually the one being broken up with due to how emotionally unavailable he is and the fact that he can never seem to tear himself away from his work for long. But the couple of times he has broken up with someone, he has been very straightforward about it. Not cruel, just honest and with no sugar coating or skirting around the situation, a clean break. Is there something they really wanted as a child? Write about why they wanted it and if they got it. I mean, it sounds kind of sad, but he really wanted friends. After his mom’s death, him and his brother moved to an entirely new place to live with their uncle, and Ephraim had a really hard time adjusting after everything he’d been through and it was hard for him to even talk to anyone, let alone make any friends. He did end up making friends with a few kids, but he always felt like he was the odd one out– then again, that’s how he’s felt almost his entire life. Write about something that terrified them when they were a child. Describe an incident where they can feel the fear. The only thing he remembers clearly from his childhood is the night his mother was murdered. He was eight years old, and he remembers that entire night in great detail. A man, who was a coworker of his mother’s, broke into their house and brutally murdered his mother by stabbing her sixteen times, while Ephraim hid in a closet. He managed to get a good look at the man– his face was burned into Ephraim’s brain, and he still has nightmares about that night and about him. To make matters worse, Ephraim identified the man in a police line-up, testified as a witness in court, and the man still got off on a bullshit alibi after the defense managed to portray him as a very confused, traumatized kid who couldn’t possibly remember what he saw that night. Do they have any secrets? If so, are they holding them back? Ephraim is full of secrets. Big secrets and small ones. Pretty much everything about him is a mystery to everyone that knows him– he keeps himself at arm’s length from everyone, offers very little in the way of personal information (and a good portion of the information he’s offered isn’t even the truth), and has no desire to let anyone get close to him. Being secretive comes naturally to him– it’s his way of protecting himself, keeping himself out of reach from others. How do they display affection? He doesn’t. He’s not an affectionate person by nature and sees displays of affection as weakness and vulnerability, two things he just won’t allow in himself. Honestly, he’s more than a little touch-starved, but he doesn’t realize that. If he would actually allow himself to open up to someone and trust someone, he would enjoy some physical affection now and then (like seriously, he needs a good hug more than he knows), but the chances of that are very slim~ Do they have a strong moral compass or are they willing to break the rules if it benefits them? I meeean… it’s complicated. Ephraim does have a moral compass, he has very strong ideas of right and wrong. But at the same time, he’s not a rule follower, and he does things that most people would find to be morally wrong. He tells lies, he looks the other way when faulty evidence is entered into court as long as it helps his case, and he’s not exactly a kind person. His view of right and wrong is just a bit skewed by his past experiences, and what he needs is someone who will call him out on his bullshit and hypocrisy once in a while.

#character: ephraim davies #ship: quinn/ephraim #questionnaire

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tuffduff · 5 years ago

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Life After You (Duff McKagan x Reader)

Pairing: angsty/fluffy Duff x Reader

Words: 4,733

A/N: Hey loves! This one actually isn’t a request, I was inspired by Taylor Swift’s “All Too Well” and actually didn’t intend for this to be so long, but it just came out.

P A R T T W O

Seattle had never been your home. You were not a born and raised native, never quite got used to the torrential downpours and overcast skies. In fact, you always waited for the day you would eventually move, figuring the setting to be just a minor stepping stone in your ultimate life story.

Until you met him.

It started in autumn, with falling leaves and brisk air. You had barely entered your twenties and the existential dread hadn’t yet set in; you were itching to find your niche and sense of belonging. Maybe that’s why you agreed to go with friends to some punk house to see a local band. The guys playing were interesting for lack of a better word, and you found yourself staring at the bassist. He was the tallest of the bunch with shaggy blonde hair and wandering eyes that kept finding their way back to you. You brushed it off though, thinking you were imagining it, until your friend leaned over and whispered, “the tall blonde one is checking you out.”

After the show, when the band began mingling with the small crowd, you wondered if he was going to come and introduce himself. That’s when someone hollered a warning for the cops and everyone scattered. You split out one of the backdoors, thankful that you lived just down the block.

“Hey! Wait up!” You slowed down in the alley, watching your breath in the air as the tall blonde ran to catch up to you. He had something in his hand; the scarf you had worn out and already forgotten about. It must have slipped off when you ran.

“Oh...thank you! You didn’t have to do that,” you replied, accepting the garment back. He shrugged a little, trying to keep eye contact but slightly faltering.

“I’ve never seen you around before.” He noted.

“Do you recognize every face around here?” You asked, unable to stop the smile from forming on your face. He smiled back.

“Only the pretty ones.” You weren’t expecting that. Nor the blush that crept to your cheeks. “I’d known if I had seen you before.”

“This is my first show. You were really great, by the way...?”

“Duff.” He replied, sticking his hand out. You took it with a smile.

“Y/N.”

“Do you live far?” He asked. For some reason, it wasn’t threatening. Some wall had already been broken from the beginning, when you both couldn’t stop staring.

“Down the block, thankfully. I should be able to make it home in about five minutes if I walk fast.” You replied.

“How about I walk you and we make it in 10?” He offered. You tilted your head.

“Why 10?”

“We’ll walk slow.”

That was exactly what happened. Ten minutes turned quickly to 15, and then 20, with the both of you talking outside your residence, both of you seemingly unwilling to let the night end. You were freezing beneath your coat but didn’t notice; Duff however was without a jacket and had his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans.

“Can I see you again?” He asked bluntly. You smiled.

“You know where to find me.” He smiled back.

“Cool. Okay. Have a goodnight, Y/N—” he had turned to start walking away, but you had grabbed onto his shoulder to stop him. Gently, you draped the scarf around his neck.

“I think you need this more than I do. Take good care of it, you hear?” You told him with feigned seriousness. His returning smile was one you would never get out of your mind. Even to this day.

And so it went you discovered real love. Maybe with other people, they didn’t quite realize it at the time, but with Duff, you just knew. He was your first love, and with him came a new stage in your life. There was life before Duff and now life with Duff.

Back then, you had been blissfully unaware that there would be life after too.

Days quickly turned to a weeks. Months passed; holidays were celebrated in a new fashion, always together. Him not having quite enough money for a Christmas present, so he wrote you a song and gifted you a necklace that had once belonged to his grandmother. There were never any arguments, the both of you couldn’t get enough of each other. You figured, in the back of your head, that it was infatuation and it would wear off soon, but for those months, neither of you could get your fill.

Somehow a year had flown by and you found yourself back in autumn again, a year under your belts as a couple without possibly being able to imagine being more in love. And yet, you found new ways to fall in love with him just about every day. The two of you moved in together, Duff working at a bakery and you doing your best juggling school and working at a record shop, where Duff would spent his free time.

He had a broad assortment of family members and friends and you had taken a spot amongst them. They all knew you too, they were now your friends. Duff’s mom had you over every other weekend and would bake pies with you, telling stories of growing up during the depression and what Duff was like as a child. The charming youngest, always creative and eager to perform his duty as a man, trying his best to look after his mom. “He’ll always do his best at taking care of you and succeeding, but I’m just glad he’s found someone to take care of his heart.” She would tell you.

Duff knew he could make real money moving up at the bakery he was at. After-all, he was a hard worker and his bosses appreciated that, and really, it wasn’t bad work. But he always talked about music; the both of you would stay up at night staring at the darkened ceiling sharing your hopes, your dreams, your past, your futures. Sometimes the ceiling would grow light as you stayed up talking. Your fears would come into conversation too, but those moments were fleeting; you were both young and ambitious and fueled by love, what in this life couldn’t be accomplished when you had that?

He talked too, in disdain and grief, about the state of his hometown, of the dangerous heroin use spiraling out of control, vowing he would never turn out like them. He said he was ready to get out, like you had always said.

But then you were offered a chance of a lifetime, an internship at the local radio station for your journalism degree. You couldn’t leave now, but Duff was already decided. It left you both at a fork in the road.

“I would never stop you. You’re right. The only way you’re gonna know if you can make it is away from here. I’ll be right behind you; I’m sure I can easily find work in LA after my internship.” You put on a strong face and decided to be his rock. You had to take care of his heart. After all, your love was the strongest thing you had ever experienced. If you were meant to be, it always would and you had no doubts whatsoever, even if it meant time apart.

“I love you, Y/N. I’ll call you every day. You’ll have to visit when you have the chance, okay?” He took your scarf amongst the bare minimum of things packed away in his old car, and you waved goodbye with a smile and weird sense of displacement, but ultimately, you were hopeful.

Time somehow went faster and slower after he left. He did in fact call you every day, telling you about his new job working at the same restaurant with his brother. The shitty apartment he found and how he slept with cockroaches. “You wouldn’t last a day here, baby.” He teased you over the phone when you lamented your disgust. “Every night there’s helicopter lights outside my window. If you don’t hear from me tomorrow…” He kept your spirits high with his humor, even miles and miles away.

He told you all about meeting Slash and Steven, who were looking for a bass player for their band. He called you with a heavy heart often because he missed you, he called to hear your voice when he doubted himself. The excited phone calls were your favorite. His happiness was yours and it was beginning to sound like he might just have a chance in LA—not that you ever doubted it.

You answered every call at first, but as your semester went on, it got harder. Your phone calls grew scarce, but he still kept you updated. He mailed flowers to your house when you had your finals, somehow scrounging up money he had made from gigs with his new band, Guns ‘N Roses.

“The guys can’t wait to meet you, Y/N.” He told you over the phone and you would laugh listening to the group of guys yelling their hellos in the background. You had chatted with all of them at one point. They called you hotshot affectionately, impressed by the fact that you were actually obtaining a college degree.

Graduation came, but Duff didn’t. He had a gig the same night. But it wasn’t a big deal to you, his mom and sisters came. Duff called you as soon as the gig finished, and though you stayed on the phone for over an hour, you still cried yourself to sleep.

Aspiring for LA right out of the gates had been a naïve pipedream on your part. Duff had done it, but it was different for you. Turned out, it wasn’t the place where dreams came true, at least not for you. Work sent you across the country, all the way to Spartanburg, South Carolina, where you found work as a reporter.

“Someday when we’re actually making money, you won’t have to work anymore.” Duff would try to reassure you. To his credit, he helped you move despite his busy schedule that was only growing more demanding. “I’m gonna give you the life you deserve.”

“I don’t mind the work, if it weren’t here.” You told him, smiling. “Gotta get something out of this piece of paper though, right? I just…miss you.” You never knew missing someone could cause physically heartache.

“Believe me, babe, I miss you more. The guys are tired of hearing about it. But we’re gonna be together again soon, just wait. You can stick out here and you’re going to do amazing and soon, we’ll both be living in some nice place in LA.”

This was the point in your life where you were so busy you couldn’t keep your eyes open when you made it home at night. You had long hours, early hours, and it seemed your schedule and Duff’s schedule, or, lack thereof, never matched up. If he called, it was usually after midnight when you were sleeping. If you called back, it was early morning, when he was sleeping. Communication was exchanged more through voicemail than an actual call. You saved every one that he left you.

Guns N’ Roses gigs were now selling out all the local clubs. There was a record deal for his band, and then an album. You were climbing your own ladder too, and just when you finally had the opportunity to work out of LA for a promising up-and-coming music magazine, Duff was about to be taken away, on tour. You only had about a week together in LA when you made it. But what a week it was.

“Every day you weren’t here, I would wake up and the sun would be out and the first thing I would think is ‘Y/N is gonna love it here.’” He told you as you drove down Sunset Boulevard. He had an actual car now to his name and new clothes and you had never been attracted to him more in your life. The both of you spent at least a day marveling over one another’s new appearances.

“God, I can’t believe I get to call you mine. You just look different,” he told you while stopped at a stoplight. He couldn’t take his eyes away from you, traveling up and down in disbelief, shaking his head slightly. “How is it possible that you’ve gotten more beautiful?” His smiled, you told yourself to remember the moment, to take in the warm glow of the sun and crowds of people on the street, Guns N’ Roses on the radio as you drove, palm trees over your head. You were in bliss. At least, most of the time.

Love was just as you had remembered it. That reunited week was like heaven for your tired soul; you had grown used to an empty bed and now you still couldn’t catch up on sleep, the two of you wasting each night tangled in limbs and sheets, still unable to get enough of each other. He showed you his favorite parts of the Sunset nightlife, some of which you didn’t have the heart to tell him you disliked; the shady Mexican restaurant where patrons were getting blowjobs under the table, or the various clubs they had played and conquered, where bar-goers puked outside the doors and went back in for more.

The rest of Guns N’ Roses were as authentic as Duff and they were easy to appreciate and get along with. They never made you feel like an outsider, even when that was plainly obvious—you didn’t dress like the girls on the strip and you never let it bother you, you were simply being you and that was enough.

Though you and Duff still had endless conversation to share, you couldn’t help but notice a difference, one glaringly obvious one; he drank more than he ever had before. It would start with vodka out of the gates and never seemed to stop. You were the only one left to carry him home, sober and still living in the real world.

“Baby, maybe you should slow down on the drinking.” You tried to tell him before he left for tour.

“Hey—don’t worry about me, okay, beautiful?” He breezed off your words with a kiss goodbye and a smile. “Take care of yourself and don’t miss me too much.”

This time, time went even faster. The magazine was in high-demand and you had several assignments seemingly all at the same time, ever moment of every day. You even had the pleasure of covering Guns N’ Roses as they became one of the hottest bands in the world. It seemed everywhere you went, all you ever saw were guys dressed like Duff, or Duff’s face on the cover of a magazine. On MTV, sometimes the news. Now, everything felt surreal.

This is where things get blurry; you don’t spend too much time in this period of your memories. Why would you? The drunk phone calls. Lonely nights in LA. The nasty rumors. Any time you were reunited, all you could smell was liquor. To this day, the smell made your stomach drop.

“Duff, I’m serous. I’m not asking you anymore, I’m telling you; you drink too much.” You were forced to put your foot down during a rare time of being reunited.

“Y/N, ease up. It’s not that big of deal, that’s what we do.”

“Since when?” You questioned. “How many times did we talk about old friends back home, how many of them took it too far?”

“I’m not like them.” He snapped back. “I don’t depend on drinking, or coke, or anything—I’ve only done heroin one time!” This was the first of many times his addiction finally began cracking away at your heart. You couldn’t fathom that he didn’t see an issue in his words.

“Duff, you said you never would.”

“So what, it was one time, Y/N! It’s not like I’m addicted, get off my back.” No, these were not the conversations you spent your time thinking of.

It began a long battle in your relationship that you were both destined to lose, and also became an internal battle to yourself. Maybe you had it all wrong, after-all, it wasn’t as if you didn’t indulge in drinking every now and then too, the both of you were young, it was LA—what was the harm? You tried desperately to see it from his point, he was a Rockstar, he did have an image to maintain…but that never held up in your head rationally; this wasn’t your Duff. He didn’t give a fuck about an image. But was it your place to police him? Often times, you just felt like the lame girlfriend. You started keeping your mouth shut despite your growing alarm and aching heart.

Too quickly, it turned to recklessness, then even quicker to hopelessness. To the rest of the world, Guns was still the band that was gonna take over the 90s. They were on one of the longest rock tours in history, they had a double album out, but you knew better. They had already lost members; you had written the articles about Steven and then Izzy’s departures. You sometimes wondered at night if Duff would be next.

He hadn’t even been there to help you move into the new house the two of you bought together. It felt as empty as your relationship and you wondered why you stayed, only to have the question answered every time you looked back into his eyes. Would you ever not love this man?

“I’m gonna fix it, I swear. I just—there’s nothing I can do. Axl’s always late and so we just—we drink. And, I can’t help it, Y/N, you know those panic attacks I always used to get? It’s not like you’re with me anymore and I just get them all the fucking time. I can’t fly without drinking; it just sets me off. I can’t take all the shit, when we’re late to the stage all you can hear is the crowd getting angry...” you knew all about that; you had written an article about the Riverport Riot. At this point you were tired of writing about the latest of the controversial rumors and incidents.

It wasn’t as if his words didn’t break your heart. You were at a complete loss. Rationally, you knew he had a disease that you had to fight together, but it only resulted in the both of you screaming at each other. Duff wasn’t at a place where he wanted to change, that was what made it hard.

At first, you avoided the realization, you tried running from it. When friends asked, you always said your relationship was better than ever. But the worse his issues got, the more you were pushed to confront them. It was just drinking anymore, it was pills and cocaine and whatever else just happened to be in the room, whatever someone slipped him.

Ultimatums weren’t your thing; you were never going to beg someone to prove you were important. Plus, you had seen addictions cripple people. Duff was in its vice grip and had already slipped away from you, it was very obvious what you had to do. But how? How could you, he was your soulmate. This was still the boy who had walked you home that autumn night—he was all you knew. How do you unravel yourself from someone tied so intricately to every detail of your life?

You couldn’t tell him at first, you just packed up and left. You ran. It was a while before he called you, demanding to know what was going on. To date, it’s still your most humiliating phone call. It’s not a memory you revisit, ever, and you’re not sure if it’s because of the pain of it or the embarrassment—you had cried so hard you couldn’t work the next day.

For a while, you felt empty. Lost. You would cry at stoplights. You would cry at lunch, in the grocery store passing by his favorite chips. The radio was much too risky to ever bother with, if it wasn’t one of their songs coming through the speaker, it was his favorite Prince song, or a song tied to a memory.

The youth of your twenties faded that day and you were pushed into the next period of your life reluctantly, your steps sluggish and uncertain. It was autumn again, cozy months where people spent their time with loved ones. You spent it crying over the idea of Thanksgiving alone, unable to pull out any Christmas decorations or pretend to care about any semblance of a normal life; all of this was new again and still littered with the broken promises of something you thought you would never lose. How were you ever going to decorate a tree again when he wasn’t there to put you on top of his shoulders to place the star? Who was going to make snickerdoodle and gingerbread cookies by your side? His jackets and shirts made up half your wardrobe, his fingerprint on your life was almost entirely irreversible.

It wasn’t as though he gave up on you. Sometimes he would call. At first you always answered, frantic and hopeful.

“I stopped drinking,” he told you, but had a slurred speech.

“Then why are you drunk?” You questioned, already on the verge of tears.

“I’m not drunk,” he denied your words. “I haven’t drank vodka in a week.”

“Then what are you drinking?” You were aware of how stupid you sounded, playing along, but couldn’t stop the hope you felt.

“Wine. It’s not bad,” he insisted. “I stopped drinking for you, why aren’t you happy? Y/N…C’mon, please, I promise I’m better now, I just miss you—” You hung up. That night was a bad one.

Looking back, maybe there were more bad memories than good. It wasn’t as if you were unbiased. But maybe the good outweighed the bad by importance. Duff had shaped your life, the foundation of who you were. When you thought of love, you thought of him, and gave up the concept.

Now, just barely entering your thirties, you found yourself surprised to be back in Seattle. Maybe deep down you were still chasing after the best time of your life. It probably wasn’t healthy to let your mind wander backwards, but it did, every time you took certain roads. Sometimes you avoided them, but most of the time, you drove down the tree-lined roads, remembering when it had been the two of you. Back to a time when you thought you hated the rain and couldn’t wait to get out of it; now rain brought you peace.

Life was much more peaceful now. You worked as a freelance writer and genuinely enjoyed the topics you wrote about, thankful not to have to write another Guns N’ Roses article. It wasn’t like there was much to write about anyways in that category; there were rumors the band was on the brink of breaking up. It was still lonely, but the pain had subsided. You were okay with being alone and you were smart enough to fill your time with meaningful activities.

You never lost contact with Duff’s family. His mom finally stopped trying to apologize. You did your best not to consume your waking hours following the band, trying your best to force yourself into moving on entirely. Duff had released a solo album, and though your heart still swelled with pride, you couldn’t listen to it. There were rumors a lot of the songs were about you.

Nowadays, the reminders of him were scarce. He looked to be in rough shape, but you did your best not to let it bother you; that wasn’t your battle. You stopped crying and you had developed your own routine. Routine was important. Your house was decorated the way you wanted it and you had a dog, an affectionate brown Labrador. Now, you considered this place home and had favorite spots and local shops you spent time at, and yes, some of them were places the two of you had once frequented, but the reminder didn’t hurt anymore. The hurt was still there, if you pulled everything back and looked down within, but mainly, there was an appreciation for what once had been. At least, that’s what you told yourself.

It was clear that wasn’t the case when you left your favorite coffee shop one Sunday afternoon and spotted a familiar face across the parking lot. At first, you thought your eyes were deceiving you—his hair had been long for years. This man no longer looked puffy and fatigued like you had seen in pictures, he was leaner and had short spiky hair. More importantly though, his eyes were clear. That was when you were sure you must have been dreaming.

“Y/N?” He said, his voice unsteady, but somehow still sounded the same. Your coffee tumbled to the ground and he reached out too late. “Shit. Sorry, I...” he trailed off helplessly; you hadn’t even looked down at the spill once yet.

“Duff?” You asked, waiting for wake up from this weird dream. He stood a little bit back from you.

“You still come here, huh?” He asked after a moment, trying to smile. When you didn’t reply, he cleared his throat uncomfortably. “I heard you moved back. I didn’t really believe it at first, but I guess...I bought a house here too.” you didn’t reply still, no words could come out. He shoved his hands into his pockets and you could feel your eyes watering. “How have you been?”

“Good. Fine, yeah.” You replied quietly, somehow able to keep the moisture in your eyes. “I’m surprised your home and not on the road for your album.” Maybe you had paid more attention than you realized. He looked down.

“...Yeah. Um,” he chuckled uncomfortably. “I actually canceled a lot of the days earlier this year, I was exhausted. I thought maybe coming back home would be better for me...I...” he paused before he shook his head a little and let out a breath. “It’s been...a real eye opening few months.”

For a second, your heart pounded hopefully and you wondered desperately what that meant, before you told yourself to stop.

“To be honest, I’m in a hurry, so...I should probably get going.” Your tone was suddenly curt, sharp and brisk as the autumn air; the falling leaves behind you threatened to break your composed façade; it was all taking you back to a different time and you knew you needed to leave. Duff suddenly looked apologetic.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry, uh...” he shrugged. “Um...I just. I know you’re busy and everything, but...maybe, just...” every time he met your eyes, he looked away again. You bit your lip hard.

“Yeah, I don’t have a lot of free time nowadays. I’m sure you get it.” You forced out. He nodded, looking down and backing away from your car.

“...Yeah. Well...take care.” He ended lamely. The longer you looked, the more it was apparent his eyes were actually clear. “And I just…I hope you know I’m sorry.” You swallowed hard and turned away without another word to get into your car and seal yourself away. Inside, you could finally let yourself crumble, feeling the mixture of a pounding heart and butterflies quickly crumbling and falling in your stomach, your hands shaking as you tried to get the key into the ignition.

Realizing in panic maybe you had made a mistake, you quickly turned your head to find him again, but only caught a brief glance of him before he entered the shop, and that’s when it caught your eye.

The red fabric around his neck, nestled into the leather jacket he had on.

Your old scarf, still there, the lasting image of you on him.

You weren’t the only one struggling with accepting the loss of the only real thing you had ever felt in your life, but it wasn’t enough to move you from your car. So you sat, engine idling, until finally tears that had started as a stream turned to just a few stray drops. But it took you longer than 5 minutes, longer than 10, to finally drive away.

#duff mckagan #duff mckagan imagine #duff mckagan fanfiction #duff mckagan x reader #duff mckagan fanfic #guns n roses #guns n roses imagine #guns n roses fanfic #80s imagines #gnr #gnr fanfiction

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reshirement · 4 years ago

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Sending one right back at you :) for the OTP questions, for bagginshield, 1, 6, 12, 27, and if you’re up for it 29 & 30! (no pressure of course I know it’s a lot)

hey, no worries @sunnibits! i love these! i used to have a friend where i’d post question lists that were sometimes a mile long, and she’d come into my inbox like ‘ALL OF THEM HAHAH’ so i’d have to spend two days writing an essay. 😂 not to say i didn’t do exactly the same thing 👀 but in any case thank you for the questions!

1. Who is the most affectionate?

This is a tough one because I think they’re both very affectionate, if in different ways. Physically affectionate, Thorin is going to top out on this one. If he wants to hold Bilbo (and Bilbo doesn’t seem to be in any kind of mood to stop him in a serious manner) he’s going to hold Bilbo or take his hand, give him a kiss, wrap him in his cloak and rest his chin on top of his head, that sort of thing so there’s absolutely no mistaking how he feels.

Bilbo, on the other hand, while he enjoys that sort of affection very much, I think would show it more in other ways. Rearranging meetings or taking on additional projects in Erebor when he thinks Thorin has too much on his plate, making sure Thorin eats more than once a day and eats well by cooking for him (honestly he will feed this dwarf hobbit style if he can get away with it, food is important), having a warm hearth, hot bath and a filled pipe ready for Thorin when he returns for the day from wherever he’s been, little daily things beyond the physical that absolutely radiate love and care.

6. What is their favorite feature of their partner’s?

Hm. If you asked him, I think Bilbo would mention Thorin’s blue-grey eyes, the strength of his arms, the silver-threaded fall of Thorin’s hair. Things you can wax lyrical about in a sonnet or a story, things that make sense to share in conversation. But really, his favorite bits of the dwarf are probably more intimate, personal details, like the curve of his ear, visible on the rare occasions Thorin puts his hair back in a loose tie, the slight curl of the smile hidden just under his beard when he’s teasing. The roughness of his hands, the paler, almost dainty skin of his feet always hidden by heavy boots (once he stops chuckling about them, anyhow). Pieces of Thorin that feel like they’re just Bilbo’s, those are his favorites.

As for Thorin, I think he mostly appreciates Bilbo’s softness both in face and body (something the dwarf has not had much of in his life, and indulges in with Bilbo), watching the laugh lines develop around his eyes and mouth, the smirk Bilbo gives him when the hobbit feels he’s done something exceptionally clever, or when they share a private joke.

I also think he probably also has a fascination with Bilbo’s ears, but never brings it up because that’s just asking for a teasing volley about their pointed similarity to the ears of elves (which Thorin would vehemently disagree with both on principle and because honestly they look absolutely nothing alike, he’s spent a lot of time considering this, you see).

12. Who initiates kisses?

Depends on which part you’d consider ‘initiating.’ Thorin, for sure, is the one to swoop in for a peck on the cheek, a full snog or anything in between whenever the whim strikes him, but Bilbo is what I like to call a kiss angler. He’s the one who is going to make eye contact and tilt his head just so, or lean in just a bit too close over Thorin’s shoulder to see what he’s working on, probably with an additional, unnecessary hand on the shoulder that will tilt their faces that much closer.

This tactic is often subtle, and is meant to draw the dwarf in without technically shifting his focus from anything else, and honestly is such a common occurrence that the movement won’t even register with Thorin before he complies and Bilbo gets his kiss (not that he would mind in the slightest!)

27. Who would sing to their child back to sleep?

Both of them. Thorin has nephews he raised, so I’m sure that move would be old-hat to him, and as a lighter sleeper, it would probably be him most often rising in the night to see about a child’s distress.

I think Thorin would absolutely sing to soothe a child as a go-to method, crooning a lullaby or two, and while I’m certain Bilbo would sing as well if a child wanted him to, he’d probably have to be asked first. After all, Bilbo’s a story-teller, and more likely to offer a tale over a song to calm and distract a little one from fears in the night.

29. One headcanon about this OTP that breaks your heart.

I think Frodo is right, Bilbo knew the value of the mithril quite well, but I don’t believe he knew at first when it was given to him, or had any inkling of it’s value, other than as a gift from someone he loved (whether he realized it yet or not) that he was profoundly worried about given the dragonsickness and the armies at the time.

But eventually, Bilbo found out. Whether from a dwarf friend visiting him in his home, or an old history book he was perusing years down the line, eVENTUALLY Bilbo learned what the mithril was, how incredibly valuable, how profoundly irreplaceable, and Thorin had handed it over freely with his heartfelt ‘It is a gift’ to Bilbo whilst in the throes of dragonsickness where he trusted not even his own kin.

Now as I said, years down the line, Bilbo’s at home, he’s coping, he’s living. He’s pushed it down in the traditional hobbit style of ‘I’m going to keep everything right here and then one day I’ll die.’ (considering the people he lived with in the Shire, there wasn’t exactly another option for him.) He’d loved Thorin then, and still does, but it’s a painful, perhaps romanticized tragedy, one that exists solely in the writers’ mind. Perhaps other than a double-handful of small moments, there was no real tangible proof that Thorin felt as he did, and it would be easy to convince himself over the years that whatever connection they appeared to have was perhaps a one-sided one. That they were dear friends, nothing more. After all, it’s easier to grieve a personal loss if it’s confined to the tragedy, and not the shape your future might have taken.

But the mithril, once the gravity of that gesture truly sinks in, what it meant, what it means. I can imagine that unlocking some terrible floodgates, and all of a sudden the battle was only yesterday and he’s grieving because Thorin loved him too, and he’s angry, furious. Angry at Thorin, angry at the both of them for not saying anything sooner, angry at himself, the dragon, the armies, the sickness.

Angry at what he lost, what they all lost, and I can’t imagine him being anything but horrendously overwhelmed, and feeling heartbrokenly alone. I think the mithril shirt would in that very moment go from a nostalgic comfort to a terrible burden, and I believe the night that Bilbo discovered the true worth of the mithril was the same night it ended up in the mathom-house.

30. One headcanon about this OTP that mends it.

Now that that godawful headcanon is out of the way, how about this one for the book!verse? After the Battle of the Five Armies, Erebor held too many ghosts. Thorin did not fall, (though perhaps he meant to fall, what with the leaving behind of the armor before making that suicidal charge) and abdicating was not only the best option considering his actions under the goldsickness and how that might impact Erebor and future treaties with neighboring kingdoms, but also he fact that he’s lived his whole life for his people, he has succeeded in securing their ancestral home, and maybe carving his own path is now a desired option. He’s free.

Fili and Kili also live, but don’t want the throne. They’ve been raised in the Blue Mountains, and they love their uncle, love Erebor because of Thorin, and without him there, they’re not super interested in entering the line of succession, so Bilbo and Thorin travel to the Shire because Bilbo is adamant that it would be good for him, and Fili and Kili follow. It is closer to their mother, after all, to visit back and forth.

And perhaps the book Bilbo writes is helpful to them staying on the down-low. Everyone important in their life is sure to know the truth, so what if these three unnamed dwarves are the other hidden residents of Bag End (or perhaps, just one hidden resident and two visiting nephews), kept safe from discovery from friends and family both, and Bilbo and Thorin, somehow, had their happy ending?

tl;dr: THE LINE OF DURIN IS FINE, EVERYONE IS FINE.

#asks #otp questions #sunnibits #sorry i wanted to make sure i could sit down and answer in full <3 #thank you for the questions!!#that last one I guess isn’t technically an headcanon as much as wishful thinking but ah well

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

Text

Survey #351

“the writing on the wall / a psalm of napalm / abandon all hope, but try to stay calm”

Do you have bad posture? Oh yeah. Are your eyes sensitive to sunlight? VERY. How many miles can you run without stopping? An astonishing zero miles. Who is the most attractive person you know personally? My high school friend Alon, probably. Have you ever dated someone who was very vastly different from your “type”? No. When was the first time you said "I love you" to a significant other? When I dated my first real boyfriend Jason at 16. I actually said it very early in because I thought I was "supposed" to, and I did REALLY like him. How old were you when you first lived alone? If you’ve never lived alone, how old do you think you’ll be? I haven't yet, and idk. What do you wish you had been better prepared for? Ha, adulthood. Is there anything about you (physically) that you think turns people off of you right off the bat? My weight. Do you know anyone with a semicolon tattoo? I have a semicolon butterfly tattoo on my wrist, and while it's very subtle, my Mark tat features a semicolon, too. It's outlined by a quote he's said ("you are important, never forget that"), and the "i" is a semicolon. Idk if I know anyone else with one. Have you ever overdosed on a drug? Once accidentally, once purposefully. Have you ever kissed a guy you didn’t want to kiss? Yes. Who was the last guy you cuddled with? Girt. What is something you’ve had a toxic reaction to? The breakup with Jason. In the last picture taken of you, how did you pose? I just tilted my head, smiled, and gave a peace sign, haha. Mom wanted to show my sister how I looked with a dozen wires and other shit attached to me for my sleep study. Have you ever made a fake Facebook account? If so, why? No. If you were an Eevee, what would you wanna evolve into? Probably Espeon? They're so, so majestic and beautiful. I'd love to feel like that, lol. What flavor was the last piece of gum you chewed? Raspberry lemonade. Did you ever used to watch the show Teen Titans? Nah. When you were in school/if you are in school, do you actually share your grades with your parents? If you got/get a bad grade, do you hide it from them? My mom always stayed up-to-date with my grades. I never really had anything to hide. Have you ever been the designated driver? Once or twice, yeah. Were you obsessed with Webkinz when they first came out? "Obsessed" is an understatement. I was that kid with dozens upon dozens. They were pretty much my favorite thing. Who do you subscribe to on YouTube, if anybody? Oh Jesus, looooots. Are you wearing nail polish right now? What color? No. Neon colors, or pastel? Pastel. Are you currently pregnant? Do you wish you were/weren’t? I'm not and have zero desire to be. Have you ever had a dog? A good number of them throughout my life. Is there any drama going on right now in your life? No. Does your hair fall out a lot? No. What’s your favourite type of bird? Barn owls. I also love ravens and crows. How many friends do you have on Facebook? 126. What was on the last sandwich you ate? Pb&j. What sort of music did you listen to when you were in high school? The same as I do now: metal and its various subgenres. Have you ever gotten back together with an ex? No. How far away is the closest store to your house and what is it? I'm actually unsure which is the closest. We live in a cul-de-sac with a bunch of houses, and the street opens into just outside the main city, so there's a lot of stores. What is your favourite Thai dish? I've actually never tried Thai food. How many contacts do you have in your phone? Very few, but I don't feel like counting. Are there any candles in your bedroom, and what scent are they? No. What pet names do you use with your significant other? I'm single. Do you have to wear a name badge where you work? I don’t have a job. Can you hear anything right now? Yeah, I'm watching Gab Smolders play Skyrim. It's a game I've always wanted to play myself. Is there anybody else in the room you’re currently in? No. What’s the name of the store you usually get your groceries? Walmart. Does your house have a porch/balcony? It has a very, very small porch. What is your mother’s first name? Donna. Did you have a tree house as a kid? No. Are you afraid of speaking to large audiences? I'm terrified of it. Have you ever cried from being so mad? Oh yeah, it's very common for me to cry when I'm mad. Have you ever taken a bath with someone? As a kid, yes. Do you have any brothers? One older one. Does your family use coasters? Is anyone in your family excessively tidy? No. Do you wear pajamas to places other than at your house? Ha, yeah, just depends on where. Do you take showers in the morning or at night more? Morning. I used to be ALL about night showers, but I just love how refreshing they are in the morning. It's a good start to the day. Do you snore? Steal the covers? Roll around in your sleep? I steal the covers SO bad and roll around a lot. God bless whoever marries me. You see the person you fell hardest for. What do you do? I can guarantee I'd be a total deer in headlights and probably tear up or just straight-up cry. Have you been/are you depressed? It's nowhere near as bad as it was once upon a time, but I honestly am depressed these days. Who is the one person you can completely be yourself around? I only feel entirely "safe" doing that around Sara. Are your popups blocked on your computer? Yeah. Are your parents night owls or morning birds? My mom's a total night owl. She absolutely hates sleeping because it's "such a waste of time" to her, but of course she does it anyway. I haven't lived with my father since I was like 16, so idk what he's really like with this stuff now, but I'd call him an early bird, particularly because his job has him up early anyway. Do you have high blood pressure? No; my blood pressure is actually extremely low, so much so it scares every doctor who hasn't treated me before. It's a medication side effect and seriously sucks, because I am absolutely always light-headed and dizzy. Have you ever pumped gas? No. Are you affectionate? Very. What would a perfect yard look like for you? Hmmm... I'm going to include things I know I won't realistically have for maintenance reasons, but what's ideal. I would loooove love love at least one really big tree with maybe a birdhouse and like a bat box (is that what they're called?), and I'd love tons and tons of flowers to feed bees and other wildlife. A koi pond would be amazing, but that's one of those things I know I won't actually have. A pool would be really nice, preferably inground, and having a spot in the shade would be perfect. Some berry bushes would be cool, and grape vines... Man, I'm really fantasizing now, haha. What is a topic that you have just recently become interested in? Nothing very recently, but I'd say the most recent would be uhhhh tarantulas, though that's been a thing for many months now. What is a feel-good song that you’ve been listening to lately? None lately, anyway. I can tell you "Jump" by Van Halen is the staple "feel-good" song for me, though. What are some things you enjoy seeing pictures of? Meerkats... Mark... more meerkats and Mark... oh also meerkats and Mark... Is there anything you are scared/awkward about talking about in life? Don't talk to me about sex. Has a pet ever stolen food from you as you were eating it? AS I was eating it, no. What is the weirdest compliment you have ever been given? I have no idea. What’s stronger - your upper or lower body? Jesus, I couldn't tell you. I'm just weak, period. Women tend to have more lower body strength, so I GUESS maybe that, but given the fact my legs are horribly weak, I don't know. My arms aren't strong, either. Are you very careful with your technology (phone, laptop, etc) or do you take risks that could damage them? I try to be mindful and careful, but you could say the way I pick up my laptop sometimes is risky. Have you ever been in the newspaper? What for? I think so, as part of my graduating class? But that would be a LOT of people... so I actually don't know. I have this faint memory of being in it with other people, but idr. Would you say that the area you live in is particularly picturesque? Ew, no. What is your favorite type of cat? One does not simply pick ONE favorite kind of cat. I love Persians, Ragdolls, Siamese, sphynxes, bengals, Abyssinians, and I could go on and on. If you had your way, what color(s) would you dye your hair? I have A LOT of colors I want to dye my hair, but the ones I'm currently most interested in are pastel pink, creamsicle orange, and lilac. Do you like seafood? If so, what is your favorite? If not, what is your favorite type of food? I only like shrimp. What religion/spiritual path intrigues you the most, if any? Paganism. It's the one I think is closest to what I believe in, and I just find it all very interesting. I love the nature focus. Would you ever consider getting dreadlocks? Nooooo. How many times is your cartilage pierced in your ears? None anymore. :( I miss all my piercings that closed while hospitalized. Have you ever had a pet bird? Nah. It'd be cool, but I don't want one enough to actually get one. Do you like dinosaurs? I looooove dinos. They were my obsession as a kid. My first dream career was even a paleontologist. Do you like going for long walks with friends? If my legs worked like a healthy fucking human's, I would love to do that again. I would literally collapse if I tried to go on a long walk now. Do you miss anyone from school? I miss a lot of people from school. I'm thankful for Facebook for that, but even that's not enough, really. What is your favorite flavor of Jolly Ranchers? Watermelon, I think? Was there a strawberry one? How are your parents right now? I'm assuming Dad's fine, and Mom's okay, just stressed as she always is. Can you take naps, or does it make you feel horrible? Man, I love naps. They're like, mandatory for my existence, lol. If you celebrate Christmas, do you get a real tree or an artificial tree? A fake one. Have you ever been told you were a good writer? Yeah. Do you watch music videos? No. Do you own an account on Club Penguin? Haha awww, remember the worldwide heartbreak when that site shut down? Anyway, I did as a kid. Do you like lemonade? Sure do. Was your first kiss perfect? To me it was. How do you feel about the first person you kissed? I feel a lot of things about him. As of right now, how do you feel about your future? Nervous. Who is the last person you ran into unexpectedly? *shrugs* Is sex something special, or just for fun? It has to be something special for me personally. Do you follow fashion? If so, why? Not at all. Have you ever played a real pinball machine? No. Do you like the smell of BBQs? I love the smell, but don't like the food. Do wasps scare you? Yes. Are you currently trying to get over someone? I mean, yes and no. I don't think I'll ever be fully over Jason, but I feel like I'm as "over him" as I'll ever be, maybe. I hope I can even further let him go, but we'll just have to see. Have you ever dated someone with longer hair than yours? Yes. Have you ever worn flip flops in the snow? HA, oh yeah. If it's only a dusting, I don't care at all. I pretty much always wear flip flops. How old were you when you met your first love? I was 15. If you could have one more pet, what? JUST one? Probably a Brazilian Black tarantula, ideally. I technically want a western hognose snake more, but given I already have a snake, in this hypothetical situation, I'd take the spider. Would you rather have an owl or a snake? Ha, speaking of snakes. A snake, even though I adore owls. What do you order at Chic-Fil-A? I don't give my business to Chick-fil-A. They're reigned by homophobic, transphobic pieces of shit that have given monetary contributions to anti-LGBT foundations, including most disgustingly those that support conversion therapy. I admittedly looooove their chicken sandwiches, but I just can't in good conscience go there. Have you ever been addicted to cigarettes? No, given I've never smoked and will never. Which do you use more? Facebook or Instagram? Facebook. Did you enjoy your past relationships? Yeah. Do you like '80s music? '80s metal is great. Something you would NEVER buy? Drugs. Have you ever questioned your sexuality? I first questioned if I was bisexual in middle school, 8th grade I think, but I went into denial about it given I was Christian at the time. Looking back, there were many clear signs of me liking girls too, I just didn't notice them until a few years ago when I came out as bi. Do you like Star Wars? No. What is the best thing about life? Experiencing love, both platonic and romantic. Are you superstitious? No. What show/concert have you gone to that you didn’t like much? I haven't experienced a bad concert before, but then again I've only been to one. Is sex a must in your life? Nah. Have you watched porn alone before? I've never watched porn period. I have absolutely no desire to watch two random people go at each other. What do you think about weed? It should be legal everywhere, but treated similarly to alcohol in that there are legal repercussions to doing certain things, like driving, under the influence. There are just too many benefits for many health conditions to ignore. Have you read the entire Bible before? No. I've started to before, but I didn't get far.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''apex predator'' by otep

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