#things you notice when you need to kill an enemy 75 times lmao

[narastories]

Not to be a monsterfucker on main, but uh... isn't this boss kind of... uh... hung? Or just happy to see us? xD

[slumberinglabyrinth]

I've already spoiled the punchline to this post, but the extra boss of Tokyo Mirage Sessions is a joke. A sick joke.

I'm writing this primarily from the perspective of Vanilla and not Encore, but I'll bring up Encore's relevant changes (that I know of) when they come up.

I think that part of the fun of the extra boss, M-DEUS, is finding your own solution to beating him, so I'll be putting how to deal with him at the end if you want to avoid it.

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M-DEUS is based off of the second phase of the final boss, Medeus; he's physically identical and mechanically just. Harder.

Much harder.

Before I get into the boss itself, some background info for the uninitiated:

Your main cast is the characters in battle, your subcast is the playable characters not in battle, and your supporting cast are NPCs who get skills that have passive effects. By endgame, your main cast has 3 people, your subcast has 4, and your supporting cast has 3. In Encore, characters in the supporting cast can also learn a session skill.

The main gimmick in TMS is Sessions; if you strike an enemy's weakness and an ally has a session skill that corresponds to the element you used (which contrary to what the term ‘element’ usually invokes, includes sword/lance/axe/bow), they'll follow up with an elemental attack of their own and start a session. Each team member except for any that perform the initial attack that starts the session can then perform a follow up attack of their own, until either everyone who can act has or an enemy nulls/reflects/drains a session attack.

Some things to note

The game optimizes the session order to maximize damage, so it's possible that the session you perform will not be the longest session possible.

Session skills only go up to medium strength (the highest normal command skills are Heavy strength, but there are a few (like. 4) Severe skills that certain characters can learn), limiting their damage output compared to regular command skills

In addition to that, characters not in the main cast deal half damage.

Bane skills (which cover Wyvern/Dragon, Armor, and Cavalry enemy types but *not* Fliers), always start a session against the relevant enemy type and pierce elemental resistance (including Reflect, Null, and Drain) for both the initial attack and it's entire session.

there is a random chance that during a session you will be granted the opportunity to choose between performing one of two random Duo Arts, which will occur after the session ends. Duo Arts are attacks involving two characters (they have to be alive, but don't need to be in your main cast) and have bonus effects ranging from healing to status ailments to SP generation. Duo Art also have the piercing effects that Bane skills have, and will, most importantly, start another session with everyone who hadn't taken part in the Duo Art. Duo Arts can appear up to twice per Command Skill use.

In Encore, the session skill learned by each supporting cast member (Maiko, Tiki, and B****) performs a follow-up attack based off of if the skill before was a weapon skill or a magic skill (it doesn't include almighty element attacks, which is only relevant in one specific instance). This means you can perform up to 9 follow-up attacks during a regular session and, unlike in Vanilla, start a session from a Body/Spirit-element skill.

Enemies can also perform sessions, under the same rules as you

In addition to regular command skills (which cost EP), you have Special Performances, which cost SP and are stronger across the board than any equivalent command skill (either through flat DPS or the effects they grant). Think of them as something like a meter-based super in a fighting game

SP is generated by performing actions (any skill, a session, using an item, etc.) and taking damage; a gauge fills up as these things happen, and once it's full, you gain a point of SP

you can store up to 3 SP at a time

some skills cost 1 SP, but stronger ones cost 2 (none cost 3)

In addition to their other effects, Special Performances will pierce resistances and always start a session if there's a skill that can follow up on it

When you use a damage-dealing command skill of a specific element, that character may instead do an Ad-Lib attack if they've learned one. Ad-Libs:

behave like Duo Arts/Special Performances (starts sessions, pierces elemental resistances)

are stronger

usually also become aoe

sometimes have a bonus effect (often a status)

there's no real downside, but they’re entirely random

While in dungeons, certain enemy spawns can end up as either 1) Rare or 2) Savage

Rare enemies run away after a few turns but give items used to craft weapons that give off-element skills or have atypical weaknesses and resistances for that particular character.

the level of Savage enemies are scaled based off of your own level, and are always meant to be A Challenge. They are the only renewable source of Detritus, an item you trade for incenses (which give +3 to a specific stat) with an NPC in the arena. You get 2-3 Detritus from each Savage enemy encounter in the main game, and incenses cost 9 each (there's no upper limit on the number you can obtain or use beyond being able to hold up to 99 at once and the hard stat cap (which you don't need to get near for ANY content in the game))

By endgame you'll have a field skill that increases the rate both rare enemies and savage enemies appear at. Farming them isn’t really hard once you get to the point where you’d want to.

One of the dlc maps in Vanilla is literally just "every enemy is Savage and every item on the ground is detritus"; you get 9-12 detritus from each encounter instead of just 2-3, and you can grab another 18 from items laying around on the map. This map is included in the base game of Encore

-----

okey

Like most megaten extra/'ultimate' bosses, you need to be on NG+ to fight M-DEUS. To unlock his fight, you must trade for incenses with Nieg (who is located in the arena and involved in a seperate sidequest) 36 times. This translates to a minimum of 27 Savage Enemy fights and a max of 36 fights if you use the DLC map, and a minimum of 108 and a max of 162 without DLC, minus a couple fights from the handful of chests with Detritus in them scattered throughout the game and a couple other sources like the Arena itself.

When you hit the level cap these fights become relatively consistently in your favor if you're prepared for them even if you don't abuse Elenora's AoE Special Perfomance which has a sizable chance to proc an instakill on any nonboss enemy (remember that), so this step isn't difficult as much as it is tedious (as is reaching the level cap if you don't use DLC lmao).

This is unfortunately also a megaten tradition.

Because M-DEUS is based off of Medeus, his general pattern is relatively simple:

He takes two actions per turn, like all other bosses after the Prologue

This may sound cheap but... it’s better (for the player) for bosses to take two actions than for them to take one really strong action based off of how atlus makes their games

the alternative is like, stuff like disaster cycle or literally anything mem aleph does

"i don’t know what that is” try to keep it that way

Counts as a dragon for skill interactions

Interestingly, the only boss (alongside medeus) with a unique class that has an effective-weakness

Every few turns, or after he's taken a certain amount of damage, he summons two additional enemies (this does not use up an action and occurs at the end of/”between” turns).

if you let any of the adds live for 2-3 turns, they will use an AOE almighty (untyped and unblockable) attack that kills them and deals a bunch of damage to you and will probably kill you if they haven't already

this isn’t a problem with medeus because he’s like. a normal boss

The enemies will probably kill you if you don't kill them first

His attacks include

Single Target Sword that pierces repel/absorb/null (it doesn't auto-start a session)

AOE Almighty ("Dies Irae", he uses this every 3 turns, this might inflict Seal)

Single Target Elec

Single Target untyped physical ("beast"/"monster") attack (might be the attack that inflicts Seal instead)

As his HP drops, he gains access to a few more attacks that get added to the "things he can do" pool

Maragidyne (AOE Fire)

Energy Drain. Deals damage and steals your HP and EP. (he uses this infrequently, but it doesn't seem to be scripted)

Dark Breath. debuffs all stats (also used infrequently, is probably scripted)

But! There's more:

If there are no adds on the field, he repels every element.

remember how he’s the only boss that has a bane weakness? yeah. that’s why

If there are adds on the field, he's weak to whatever they are and repels everything else

Because of how the rest of the fight goes, you're not going to want to try to take advantage of this.

Damage dealt to him is capped at 499 per attack

literally the only instance of a damage cap in the game

on top of the damage cap, his stats (and the stats of the adds) are inflated quite a bit

Before incenses, I was dealing like. 300 damage while in the main cast at level 99 and half that for the subcast (so a full session of 1500 instead the max of 2495)

The adds are noticably more squishy and DON’T have a hardcoded damage cap, but they pack enough firepower to make up for it.

If a party member dies, his attack increases for the rest of the fight

This is outside of the buff/debuff system, so it can't be dispelled and is effectively permanent.

He has 65534 hp, which equates to a 'soft' minimum of 19 turns for most team comps, assuming no Duo Arts

Encore can cut off a turn or two since it can have 3 extra attacks per session

the adds all suck

By default he only summons two Mercenaries, then at 75% HP he can summon two Axe Generals, then at 50% he can summon two (Lance) Wyvern Riders, and then once he's at 25% he starts summoning two Clerics. the percents are approximate.

The Mercenaries

are weak to Lance and I think Electric

kinda a pushover. mid-line bulk, but dangerous if left along

not immune to elenora's instakill

will use concentrate before their self-destruct which boosts it by 2.5x so you're just gonna mcfukin die

are summoned less often as the battle goes on

The Axe Armors

Weak to Sword, Ice, Wind. Maybe more

deals respectable damage

has like max defense and next to no resistance. physical attacks deal single digit damage and magic damage easily enters four digits.

has high hp (maybe 10,000?)

also not immune to elenora's instakill

The Wyvern Riders

Weak to Axe, Bow, Wind. Maybe more

counts as a dragon for bane skills

deals LOTS of damage

has an aoe fire attack that also poisons you

these guys suck

low res and medium def

still not immune to elenora's instakill *or* Itsuki's sword Ad-Lib (which will instakill any non-boss dragons; there's no luck involved in the instakill once it activates, and even though getting the Ad-Lib itself to activate is luck based if you happen to be using a sword attack from him on that turn there’s always a chance that it’ll come out)

The Clerics

weak to sword/lance/axe. maybe more. probably more.

have 3000 hp and barely any defense

guess what! not immune to instakills

cast mediarahan and nothing else worth mentioning

yes

the aoe full heal skill

extra bosses in a couple other games involve diarahan/mediarahan (like Margeret and Demi-Fiend) but they only use it once, use it around 50% hp (and certainly not when the boss is in the red!) and have their next hp thresholds close enough for you to be able to reach them before they cast their full heal, making it a once-off dpt check that punishes you by effectively just making their HP 1.5x higher instead of a recurring dpt check that punishes you by making his hp nearly twice as high (or three times, or four times...)

this is unscripted and will happen as many times as you let it

the hp thresholds don't reset so he keeps summoning clerics and using all the skills he gained during the fight despite now being at full HP

fuck you atlus

can you believe people thought the worst part about this game was idols?

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Okay, so how do you fight this?

You could just grind until you take like no damage but uh. that's going to be mind-numbingly exhausting and kinda defeats the point of actually fighting the boss. So don't do that. You're going to have to grind incenses no matter what, but it's the difference between being at it for a few days or being at it for a full month.

My general game plan was tailored to

be consistent

reduce the amount of time I had to spend preparing (be it grinding for incenses or materials for weapons or whatever else i needed)

beat the boss in as few turns as possible, mainly to give it fewer chances to make choices that kill you and to make sure you don’t turn it into a battle of attrition (which you’ll lose).

This ultimately means 1) start at least one session against m-deus each turn 2) have everyone hit the damage cap against him and 3) have a person with a dragonbane skill in your main cast (sp consumption is too high to rely on special performances every turn)

be able to kill the adds before they can act because if you can’t do that at the very least for the clerics, you lose.

Some specific points that need to be addressed if we assume you're not spending 100 hours grinding incenses:

The immediate concern is making sure nobody dies. Ever. Medeus already will deal a lot of damage, and he can and will pierce tetrakarn/makarakarn (at bare minimum Dies Irae is almighty and its damage can’t be nullified, only dodged), and if he can ramp that up, you're not going to stand a chance.

He has access to an AOE fire attack and so does one of his sets of adds. Itsuki (who cannot be removed from the party in Vanilla) is by default weak to fire with nearly every weapon of his (including his ultimate weapon), and Mamori, who is your party's dedicated tank, is also weak to fire on most of her weapons. getting hit by something you're weak to will cause any adds to session and you'll die, so you want to avoid being weak to fire.

nobody in the fight has dekaja or dekunda or any buffs, so buffs and debuffs remain effective

Dark Breath will set you back, but if you keep your buffs *up* it'll just negate Dark Breath instead of Dark Breath sticking around for three turns, no matter how many turns they had remaining

The adds will cause problems. just in general. they can kill you or at the very least set medeus up to finish you off, since they tend to go earlier in the turn than him.

going before all of them is a priority, as is killing them before they act (especially the clerics)

Medeus has a damage cap. once you consistently hit 499 with all of your party members in a session, there's not much point to trying to boost your damage output

this also means you have a point where you can skip using charge or concentrate (x2.5 damage to phys or magic skills and phys or magic attacks in their sessions sessions) on anybody starts a session off of M-DEUS, since hitting the cap through stats and passive skills alone will allow you to save an action during the fight

Itsuki cannot be removed from the party in Vanilla which is both a blessing and a curse because

outside of his two rare weapons, every weapon of his including his ultimate weapon is weak to fire (bad, because this usually means more damage sustained)

has a heavy dragonbane skill (good)

He doesn’t need Adds or SP to session off of M-DEUS

itsuki's entire niche in endgame is using bane skills

he has two passives that each boost Wyrmicide by 1.5x (1.55x when fully upgraded) because it's a sword element bane skill. they stack.

this means less grinding for str for him, saving time

One thing to note is that Kiria is the only other character who has access to a dragonbane skill, Naga, but the problems with that are

Naga is Spirit element, which has no corresponding sessions in Vanilla. You should not use her as your damage against M-DEUS in Vanilla at all because you just can’t.

In Encore, Tiki's session can start off of Spirit

Itsuki kinda sucks at support, but Kiria doesn’t, so if you were to hypothetically have both on field, he’d be the one attacking M-DEUS

he doesn't get endgame buff or debuff skills, and doesn't get diarahan/mediarahan, and so on

less of problem when you can remove him from your party in Encore

Kiria's bulk and defenses are the worst in the game, which means more grinding for incenses in order to prevent her from dying

all of Kiria's weapons are weak to sword, which means you can't ensure her weakness is never struck because M-DEUS will, from turn 1, use a piercing sword-element skill

Kiria's main niche is using ice skills, so while she gets a 1.5 multiplier to Naga from True Casting (1.5x to all magic), she doesn't get a second bonus which means more grinding for incenses compared to Itsuki

None of the adds are immune to instakills. this includes both Mass Desturction (Elenora's AoE special performance) and Firm Resolve (Itsuki's anti-wyvern sword Ad-lib)

Regarding Elenora:

Even if Mass Destruction's instakill doesn't proc, she'll still start a session because it's a special performance

One of two characters with access to Debilitate, which applies all three debuffs and saves you at least one action compared to other characters with debuffs, if not two actions (the other character is Touma)

Debilitate is on her ultimate weapon, so while it's a pain to max the skill (which just makes its EP cost lower and is arguably not worth the time), you'll be getting 6 out of 7 of them anyway (for reasons I'll explain in a bit)

also has access to Fog Breath, which debuffs Atk and Hit/Evade but not Defense; this means that in a pinch (ie. energy drain took too much EP), you can apply the debuffs that will help you survive because that's more important than ending the fight faster

her ultimate weapon is only weak to Axe (which should die before her) and wind (which nobody in the fight uses); while she's squishy, you don't need to worry about sessions against her and won't need as much def/res incenses, saving time

Elenora naturally deals very respectable damage in and out of sessions because she has incredibly high Skill and reasonably high Str

Skill increases crit rate

You'll already be boosting her Skill to get Mass Destruction's instakill to proc more consistently, this means less Str incenses

In addition, she has passives that

greatly increases crit rate

increases crit damage

greatly increases dodge rate

applies a 1.5x damage boost to bow skills (incuding Mass Destruction)

that gives her a high chance to act first in the round (ie. before any adds that’ll ruin your day)

increases hit rate

gives all her attacks a high chance to make any enemy hit move to the end of the turn order during the current turn (or the next turn if they've already acted)

makes her less likely to be targeted (not as much of a concern because a lot of things in this fight are AoE and you'll mostly be using AoE healing, but still a plus)

has Radiant skills (seperate passives that don't take up a skill slot) that

make crits deal more damage

increases evade against phys attacks

boosts ailment success rates from any party member as long as she's in the main cast (not something that’ll be relied on much, but if it helps it helps)

While Elenora's instakill is reliant on luck, you can get it to proc reasonably consistently and even if it's just on one and not both of the adds, that gives you a session's worth of damage on the other add, some chip damage on M-DEUS, and one less thing that could wipe the floor with you.

She's not absolutely nessacary, but using her cuts out *a lot* of grinding and even without the instakill the access to both a high crit/evade rate and access to debilitate makes her a very strong choice for one of the characters you'll use alongside Itsuki. If you’re not trying to tank everything (which is... dumb), she’s basically the best choice for debuffs and offensive support

Because we'll be using a 2 SP special performance relatively frequently, it's vital that we increase SP generation as much as possible. In addition to stuff you’d have anyway (ie. Radiant Skills):

Everybody's ultimate weapon gives a passive boost to sp generated from their own attacks

this is why everyone except for Itsuki will have theirs equipped

Itsuki will instead have his lategame rare enemy weapon, which removes his fire weakness and isn't a significant drop in atk

you can kinda. cheese the enemy spawning system in certain parts to just give you rare enemy after rare enemy so once you figure out *where* to do it, you can max that rare weapon’s atk pretty quickly so compared to the amount of time you save over trying to max his ultimate weapon you're really just missing the sp generation

it also gives a passive chance to cause seal but since M-DEUS seems to be immune to it that doesn't really help you directly (niche use if he sessions

In a pinch, you can use Clap Tracks, an item that give you 1 SP but cannot be bought (try to carry as many over through NG+ as possible)

I found that I wasn't really needing to use Clap Tracks much, but, y'know. better to be overprepared than underprepared

Mamori and Tiki also have a Duo Art that grants half a point of SP; unless someone’s about to die and you have a healing Duo Art as your other option, you should always pick it

Okay so we have Elenora and Itsuki, but who else can we use to round off the main cast?

What we still potentially need:

Buffs

Healing

Tanking and/or Dodgetanking (including through buffs)

a source of magic damage (Itsuki has Ziodyne/Thoron, but he'll be busy)

One thing unique about TMS relative to other megatens is that there are no normal skills that apply multiple buffs, only three special performances, which will save you at least one action per turn

Debut Smile (Tsubasa, 1 SP) - Provides a medium heal and raises Def and Hit/Evade

Raindrop Memories (Mamori, 1 SP) - Prevents ailments for 3 turns and raises Atk and Def

Wild Charge (Touma, 2 SP) - Gain Charge (phys attacks and phys attacks in their sessions deal 2.5x damage) for the next two turns and raise Atk and Hit/Evade

Both Tsubasa's and Mamori's have defense, which is good, but hit/evade is more important than raising attack with regard to both surviving long enough to kill M-DEUS and saving time while grinding incenses (hit is Skill based and Evade is Speed, so you have to boost two stats instead of one to make up not getting that buff). The ailment thing is nice but uhhh I’ll get to why that’s not important if you go with Tsubasa in a moment

Touma's costs too much and doesn't raise defense and doesn't have a secondary effect that's particularly useful in this fight. :shrug:

Mamori also has a few problems of her own

No EP-based AoE heal

does get diarahan though

she has a 1 SP AoE full heal which then allows her to take another action (which could be using a clap track. or a sukukaja stone for max buffs, but you can't carry enough to make them last through the entire battle for this method, and it’ll kinda negate the benefits of her buff skill being )

her hitrate is bad.

like. really bad

she has a passive that boosts it, but it 1) comes on her when you get her and 2) isn't on any of her weapons and 3) is the earlygame iteration of the passive despite her coming after the halfway point in the game

she also has no other direct benefits from boosting Skill, unlike Elenora

she also doesn't have access to Sukukaja (unlike Tsubasa, who gets the buff skill that covers the one her SP buff doesn’t apply (tarukaja))

she is not fast and has no way to move herself up the turn order

her main role is also a tank, which could be helpful, but there's some problems with that for her with this fight in particular

she's weak to fire, which Medeus uses

she's weak to sword, which Medeus uses from turn 1

she tanks by drawing aggro and taking blows in place of an ally

she can only negate attacks if she takes that attack in place of an ally

redirecting the attack is random

negating the attack is random

if she's weak to the attack a session will still start

you don't redirect the attack on AOE attacks

the aoe attacks are the main danger in the fight. Dies Irae hurts. Maragidyne hurts. Corrupting Flare hurts.

itai desu

Tsubasa

is weak to axe and wind on her ultimate weapon (and bow, but that's not used in the fight)

can learn absorb wind, covering one of her weaknesses completely

allows you to freely use mazandyne and also heal off of it if it's reflected

two add sets are weak to wind

this is very good

has access to magic damage spells to deal with any axe generals that survive Mass Destruction

the only other characters with magic spells are Itsuki and Kiria

does almost everything

not an exaggeration

only person who learns either mediarahan or its ailment-clearing upgrade, Prayer (the only aoe ailment clear in the game outside of Duo Arts)

learns every buff skill (only needs tarukaja if you use Debut Smile, though having rakukaja or sukukaja helps conserve SP when possible)

learns Fog Breath (useful if elenora needs to do something else that turn)

has a massive EP pool and learns Mana Gain which makes it even larger

her skills are expensive but she can go longer than itsuki and elenora without having to restore EP

can learn Sexy Dance which is AoE charm

Charm is usable in this fight as like. a last resort but it will prevent any adds that it procs on to at the very least eat up their next turn if not the one after and is by and large one of the most useful skills when grinding outside of full on instakills because It's Just That Strong

charm can make them attack another enemy or use a healing item on you which is also good, but it. usually doesn't. they just do nothing

Regarding passives

learns null seal

has a passive that grants 1.5x to wind skills

has two hitrate boosting passives, one of which also boosts her evade rate 

has a passive that greatly boosts the amount her skills heal

not relevant for mediarahan/prayer, but it does boost Debut Smile which makes using it over mediarahan so you can refresh your buffs noticably safer

Personally didn't use this one but depending on how many mag/def/res incenses you decide to get it might be needed

has radiant skills that:

boost charm success rate (stacks with elenora's boost to every ailment which really puts the sexy into sexy dance)

let her session off of any charmed enemy with a lance skill

useful if you ever have to resort to sexy dance or, god forbid, Dream Catcher (a Duo Art that does almighty damage -which means it can't extend a session- that offsets *that* by also fully healing your party and inflicting charm on your foes) and she doesn't have to heal the next turn

increase her hitrate

gives her a chance of ignoring turn order calculation and act first during each turn

all and all, pretty good stuff

To give everyone else a fair evaluation:

Yasuhiro's main role is damage mitigation through dodgetanking and he's good at it. In addition

has access to Wallbreaker, which pierces null and repel (not absorb)

this is kinda useless, even outside this fight

you can't session with it unless they're weak to swords, which means it's only useful against enemies under the effect of tetraguard/tetrakarn (which nobody in this fight uses and nearly nobody in the entire game uses)

like yeah he can hit medeus but it's for a max of 499 a turn

can use tarukaja and sukukaja

takes two actions to set this up, and doesn't have rakukaja or *any* debuffs

can use Counter (and Counter EX) to ensure he dodges all single-target physical attacks that attack him until his next action, and then delivers a counter attack. Also draws aggro

only works on physical attacks, not magic attacks

only works on single target attacks, not AoE

most of the skills enemies use in this fight are AoE magic

Sound familiar? yeah tanks kinda suck in this fight

has access to passive skills that

greatly boost crit rate

greatly boost dodge rate

increases his chance of being targeted

pierces null

has access to radiant skills that

boosts evade against magic attacks

make counterattacks always crit

doesn't have elenora's "boost crit damage" skill :(

increase damage from counterattacks and repel effects while he is in the main cast

not really useful but. it’s better than nothing

Overall rating: Not a bad character, but bad for this specific fight. His damage mitigation (through drawing aggro and dodging) focuses on single target attacks, which random encounters have plenty of, but this fight relies too much on AoE and he kinda just. doesn't help there. Elenora has better and more consistent damage output and has debilitate, Tsubasa is the game's best healer, can do AoE magic, and has a slew of buffs and debuffs including damage mitigation through Rakukaja/Debut Smile's defense buff, and Itsuki can start a session off of Medeus.

Touma

has Debilitate!

no buffs though

has a passive that has a high chance of making his target(s) go last

has a passive that greatly boosts crit rate

has a passive that has a chance to make him act first each turn

has a passive that boosts his hitrate

has passives that grant 1.5x damage to each of his main elements (lance and fire)

elenora also has all of those

relatively durable

weak to axe and ice

nobody in this fight uses ice

only person who has luna

helps with the generals if it activates

its random and might not even activate

it can also activate off of sessions

only person who has penetrate, which is an upgrade to pierce (phys attacks ignore resist/null, ellie and yasuhiro also have that) that also ignores drain

penetrate doesn't ignore reflect, which isn't the end of the world since it's not like he could session off of M-Deus anyway

helps him not prematurely end a session against the adds by having his attack be nullified (i think the generals null lance and the wyverns might too)

has a passive that boosts his attack the higher % hp he's at

has a radiant skill that increases his crit rate when performing a followup attack in a session

when he's in the main cast, using an item has a chance to not consume it

useful because the game doesn't let you carry more than 10 of most of the items you'll need to use in this fight

All of that makes him a very good character for this fight, but he doesn't have elenora's instakill :( Unfortunately she does everything he wants to do in this fight *at least* as good as he can, or better :( But! He shines in the subcast for this fight and just in general. his damage output and hitrate and crit rate are all very good, and he needs probably the fewest incenses overall to reach M-DEUS' cap

Kiria

Learns naga

not useful in vanilla

arguably not worth using in encore either

learns both the single target and AoE heavy spells for Fire, Ice, and Wind

also learns the only Severe-tier Ice spell, Fimbulvetr

great utility against the adds

has a passive that gives a 1.5x boost to all magic attacks and one that gives a 1.5x boost to ice spells

these stack

only character with two 1.5 boosts that stack that has them stack on a severe tier spell

knock knock it's fimbulvetr

weak to electricity, which nobody in this fight uses, and swords, which M-Deus uses from turn 1

only healing skills of note that she learns are mediarama (medium HP AoE restore) and amrita (heal all on a single ally, kinda useless in this fight)

doesn't learn mediarahan or prayer

Learns tarunda and sukunda

doesn't learn rakunda, doesn't learn any dual debuffs or debilitate

no buffs either

has other passives that

increases resistance to all ailments

not super useful in this fight

greatly increases EP

has radiant skills that

reduce EP cost of offensive magic

further reduce EP cost of AoE offensive magic

even further reduce EP cost of Ice magic

knock knock it's mabufudyne

increase evade against phys attacks

Kiria is very good at killing things but that's really all she does and M-DEUS needs people to do more. In theory she could replace Itsuki, but her weakness to Swords, which -again- M-DEUS uses for the entire fight, can't be avoided and her HP is so low that you can't even hope that she'll just tank the hit unless you chug 100+ def incenses on top of all the other incenses that you'll be using. You could use her to fill his role, but it's going to be so incredibly inefficent that I think you should do literally anything else.

Okay.

There's one pretty obvious oversight in just deciding 'we'll use these three characters and nobody else in the fight': TMS lets you swap party members in and out (exclusing Itsuki in Vanilla), and it doesn't use up that party member's turn

This has some bonuses...

this means you can swap to people on the fly if you need, say, Kiria to deal with

this means you can adjust to party members who have

you can adjust to basically any situation

...and some drawbacks

swapping party members dispells any active buffs/debuffs/effects (charge, etc.) on that party member and the new one comes in with no buffs on them

in order for the act of swapping itself to be safe, they need higher def/res than what they otherwise would have, which means more grinding incenses

swapping party members means you need those new party members to also get their def/res increased from incenses, which means more grinding

if they stay in the subcast they aren't in danger of dying, so you don't need them to have anything other than their str (or mag, for Kiria) boosted

and the big one:

nobody really does what Elenora and Tsubasa do better than they do, so there isn't really a point in switching to another party member to begin with. during the main game? sure, everyone has their own role to play and you could use whoever you want because you don't have the chance to optimize everything and grind for incenses and the game certainly never asks you to do that outside of M-DEUS, but against M-DEUS you need to bring the best the game lets you make

unless, of course, you grind incenses like no tomorrow

And I don't want to undersell the amount of incenses I felt were necessary because hoo boy i looked at my playtime before and after I started my journey to defeat M-DEUS and it sure Took A Long Time, but using my team the only relevant stats were:

Either Str or Mag on Everyone (based off of the type of the session skill that they use when Itsuki uses Wyrmicide, and only up to the point where they consistently hit M-DEUS' damage cap; subcast needs more because they'll be dealing half damage)

Skill on Elenora (with buffs hitrates become a nonconcern so you're only doing this to get the instakills. more crits are a side bonus)

A Little Speed on Itsuki, Tsubasa, and Elenora (enough so they consistently go first)

Def/Res on Itsuki, Tsubasa, and Elenora (so they don't die)

a Luck incense for Elenora (Luck doesn't work like a typical stat and it's not important for me to explain it outside of the vague idea that it’s like a ‘personal’ stat where people have a different base level (elenora’s is the worst lol) that can be temporarily boosted using an incense or a specific drink from a vending machine, but it'll increase her proc rate)

the general game plan was to have Itsuki use Wyrmicide every turn. Killing Medeus faster gives him and his adds fewer chances to kill someone (or use Mediarahan), which increases your chances of success. I never had Itsuki use anything other than Wyrmicide unless M-DEUS drained all his EP with Energy Drain (he'd use a chakra drop to restore it in that case), but if you need him to kill an add or two it shouldn't significantly extend the length of the fight and will also stop that add from killing you. Generally speaking, you want him to go after Tsubasa and Elenora, but before M-DEUS, so that'll determine how many speed incenses you give him

Tsubasa's main concern was making sure everybody was as close to full health as possible before M-DEUS attacked each turn (and switching to Prayer if he ever procs seal), but having enough def/res across your party to make throwing Debut Smile into the mix safe to keep the buffs up is also key. She's not a bad dps unit either, so because of this you want her to be after Elenora in the turn order so you can adjust to who the instakill fails to proc on.

Elenora's main job outside of add management is casting Debilitate within three turns of the last time she used it, which means you kinda need to anticipate when adds are coming so she can use Mass Destruction to deal with them and use Debilitate on turns you won't need to deal with adds.

This rotation gives you a free action roughly every three turns for Elenora, and whenever you get lucky with dodges or damage rolls for Tsubasa. As for how you use those actions, it depends on the situation, but...

Having a full set of buffs up when Dark Breath comes is important so your damage isn't brought down (and it takes longer to win the fight), so throw in a Tarukaja from Tsubasa or a Tarukaja Stone from Elenora. You can also use these openings to refresh the Def and Hit/Evade buffs prematurely with their skill version or their item version. There's a really low cap to the number of Buff Stones you can bring into a fight, so if its at all possible default to

Making sure you're at 2 SP whenever Elenora has her action and the adds are up is VITAL, especially once the Clerics start being summoned. Use Clap Tracks if you feel like your SP isn't going to be where you need it to be, and try to only use Debut Smile when you don't have any buffs up or when both Defense and Hit/Evade are about to run out (they run out *on* tsubasa's action and not once that turn starts, which is incredibly convenient).

Maintining EP is also somewhat important, but should only be done when close to empty because Energy Drain will empty all of a character's EP and it'd be a waste of an item (though since it deals so little damage, it *could* be a turn where you don't need to heal).

[1358456]

Review Response, June 23-29, 2019

I totally forgot about this until right now. Whoops! My bad.

And also, starting with this post, each weekly review response will now show the updated graphs... charts (I keep saying graphs but they’re more charts...) of the stories that got the reviews.

Destiny #010

1) OH GOD. I KNEW IT. Y'S GOING TO DIE. THE WHOLE THING WITH X AND NOT THINKING OH HER AS "HIS GIRL" WAS A BUILD-UP OF SOME SORT. This will only cause X grief as it was one of the last things he said about Y before she died. Ohhhhh god. Poor Y, she tried so hard. I simply cannot imagine being attacked like that. And speaking of being attacked, Sapphire? Really has to get over her fear. I know its difficult love, but you're hindering the rest of your team! But anyways, going back to Y, the way she was dominating at first made me soooo happy. Finally! Proof that they can win! But nope. I still can't get over it. A death so soon... unless she miraculously survives. But tbh I can't see how.

Also nil I forgot Silver even existed for a moment there. When you mentioned him, I was completely take by surprise lmao. I don't blame you or anything, it's really hard to focus on a lot of dexholders in one chapter. But I was surprised to find that none were mentioned at the end, the it hit me that of course they weren't. They've got their own battles (problems) to deal with. Those shiny pokemon aren't going to disappear by themselves. Although I hope and pray that they do. But I am really interested as to how this battle will end. Will the dexholders prevail? Will they be defeated? Or will they retreat with their tails in between their legs? So many questions. And there can be so many answers. I'm hoping that they will win, but I just don't think that is likely tho. They've practiced yes, but it's probably not enough. They need years of practice before they can get to his level.

Also I forgot to mention, but I started sweating when I realized that Emerald still had his Mega bracelet thing I forgot what it's called. I was like "Ho boiiiiii." One could easily predict that he would be targeted first. Or at least second only to Y. But I feel like Peter is definitely using the Salamence to his advantage. I mean who wouldn't? That's one dexholder down.

Speaking of Sapphire, I absolutely love how you added in that bet between her and Gold. Like I said previously the balance of fun and not fun (?) is absolutely amazing. And I can only imagine a lot of people there probably face palmed. Which I get but like it's also a fabulous way to motivate someone (especially two competitive dexholders like them) to fight. But I doubt that that either of them will still have the heart to order around the other person after this battle. Well... then again this is Gold and Sapphire we're talking about. They are two people who might still do it. And it makes for a perfect opportunity for comedy later on. Nicely played.

I've decided to use paragraphs 'cause I tend to wander in my reviews, and it makes it easier to process. I'm sorry of this review isn't as good as the others. To be honest they only thing I feel I can say now, is about how good your writing is. But that gets tiring. And I'll make sure to shut up about Peter being so powerful later on. But I'll admit you're legit making me worried.

Anyways, thank you. Its been a pleasure like always.

I didn’t really think of that as a build-up. More like... “the f*ck, X?”. If I recall, I put that line in there because he says it in the XY arc, and it was incomprehensible... at the time. And yes. Poor heartbroken Y... :( And death so soon? This is chapter 10. It’s too soon*! And yes, Sapphire needs to get over the Salamence weakness... which she has in Destiny because this was before that scene in ORAS where Sapphire did not give a FUCK, since there was no time for such trivial things. Damn ORAS...

Silver? ... Oh yeah. That’s right. Heh. Not only are there a lot of Dex Holders in the mess, but there are those who I just do not give a damn about, who always wind up being forgotten as the focus of the chapter is elsewhere. Hehe. And the Dex Holders don’t need years of practice... they just need to embrace the game mechanics!! Hehe. ... What, is a Modest Rhyperior going to win against an Adamant one if it practiced? Heh.

The Salamence over-usage is not only because of how it cripples Sapphire, but also because the guy the Mega Hunter is based on generally always has a Salamence in his singles team. ... Usually with Choice Band and Moxie and Outrage. One-shot a guy, get Moxie boost. One-shot the next guy, get another Moxie boost. And one-shot the next guy. 3 Pokemon down in 3 turns. ... And then it usually hits itself in confusion and deals like 75% damage to itself.

Ah, the competitive rivalry between Gold and Sapphire! The one that’s hardly ever mentioned by anyone else... It’s fun, though. And all lighthearted. They always need to get the one-up on each other. Heh.

I do like the new paragraphs! It makes it easier for me to respond! I really do appreciate your reviews! :)

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Destiny #011

1) If shit wasn't already real, it is now. I honestly love the tension between Platinum and Sapphire, and it makes sense. They're the complete opposite of each other, one's quite literally wild, while the other is as refined as possible. It's only natural that they should clash. But I must admit, Platinum was being exceedingly rude. Like goddamn, you're fresh out of a battle, you need to find a new teammate and Sapphire is giving the perfect way in order to find her. Who cares if someone sees you with a girl sniffing. Stepping back was petty, though I'll also admit that Sapphire was being a but rude to Platinum when she told Platinum to just follow her. But it's simply Sapphire's way (as it is Platinum's), so I guess I can't complain too much. But I'm still rather peeved.

So, Peter thinks that the dexholders will get better, huh? That's new. Usually villains will boast and get cocky, and that usually leads to their downfall. Seems as if Peter is not going down that path. I found that a nice thing for you to add, because it only adds on to how clever this dude is. Like the little clues you leave for certain things, I'm not sure whether you write them on purpose, but some of them I notice and it only gladdens me.

In any case, I did not think Peter was going to manipulate Oak and Daisy. That actually quite surprised me, but in reality its a great way to gain information. After all, knowledge is power. And the more you know about your enemy, the more of an advantage you have. Meanwhile the dexholders don't know anything about him, only that that he wants to kill them for reasons? And some of the strategies he uses. Yikes indeed. Red voiced this perfectly in this chapter, with those questions of his. (And if I'm correct) I believe that this is another one of those "clues" I mentioned earlier. I believe Red might be the one to find out the answers to those questions, as he was the one to ask them. But that might just me looking too far into it. And I'm not exactly sure that that is a clue lmao. Ah well, a girl can come up with as big of theories as she so wishes.

Also, could it be possible that for a future strategy, they use Yellow for her healing? I mean, it seems practical. Their pokemon are not strong enough, and they drop one by one so easily. And while it seems rather cruel to constantly heal them only to fight again, that is reality. We do it all the time in the games and actually that brings me to another topic. The world of pokemon is wonky. We just capture these sort of "animals" and force them to fight for us? We might create bonds with them, but jeez these guys are just living their lives when bam! You come across them and then just capture them? And have them battle for you and constantly drain their health, only to do the process all over again. That is fucking cruel imo. I know certain trainers consider pokemon as companions and friends and whatnot, and that's all great and dandy, but like jeez. At least some pokemon come with you willingly and that's the best part. But whatever I'm getting off topic.

Again, personalities on point, writing smooth. Honestly I've never read something of your that felt jagged in a way. (Which is what really confused me when I accidentally skipped this chapter, and I was thrust into the future without an explanation of what happened at the end of the battle) Thank you.

I don’t think Platinum was being rude there at all. She doesn’t say anything, and from her perspective, it’s natural to be baffled at Sapphire. It’s like... you see someone sniffing at the air and the ground and the trees, and you just feel the urge to not be seen right next to that person. Stepping backwards was an unconscious decision, and hell, I’d do that too. And of course, Platinum hadn’t spent enough time with Sapphire to be used to it, or even appreciate her uniqueness. So for now, it’s an understandable natural reaction. And the cause of the Sapphire vs. Platinum minor feud that... I was going to push but abandoned because no one gave a f*ck.

One of the things I absolutely HATE about villains in anime/manga is their usual cockiness. If I had a dime every time some bad guy said something along the lines of “it’s over”... Well, it ain’t over ‘till it’s over. The Mega Hunter won’t be saying that it’s over when no one has died yet. And I left quite a few clues about him throughout the story. They become far more evident when Blue points them out later on.

Knowledge is power, indeed. Especially when it comes to Pokemon! ... And battles. 知彼知己 百戰不危 and all. And I think Red’s internal questions are a bit too blatant to be considered as clues. Hehe. But hey. That’s just a-

Using Yellow for healing? Oh, I do love how you consistently point out options that actually do happen shortly afterwards. It is, after all, the logical next step. And... ah, the morals of Pokemon. “Pokemon are not tools of war”... that’s because you’re not using them properly. HA! The Pokemon world ain’t looking too bright. Also factor in humans’ tendencies of eradication, and...

I did notice that you skipped this one, given the review order. But I respond in the chapter order, so this one comes first. As to how you NOT notice that you skipped a chapter... ...

2) I swear to god these reviews take me an hour to write lmaooo. I didn't even realize it took that long. Not like I'll stop but dam.

You don’t have to write such long reviews, if that helps you. I do enjoy reading your long reviews, but if it’s too much for you, you can shorten it!

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Destiny #012

1) I wouldn't be surprised if they were copying your work ngl. In fact, they'd be stupid not too. Its that good but anyways, I'm face palming myself now. Of course it was a pokemon. What else could it have been? Honestly, sometimes I'm amazed at my own stupidity. Just like I'm amazed at your writing this chapter! Y's, Platinum's, and Blue's insecurity felt all unique! Like, one could tell it was insecurity, but each felt it in a different way. Which I felt reflected in your writing (as I'm starting to realize most emotions of the characters do) which might've just been encase of their different situations, but I feel like it was more than that. Kudos to you, that's hard to accomplish. And speaking of insecurity, this Peter guy seems to really know how to manipulate it. 'Cause I know the pokemon was doing the brainwashing, but Peter was the one putting the ideas and thoughts into Blue's mind. But he wasn't forcing them, he was juts voicing some of the thoughts he assumed were going on in Blue's mind. Also speaking of Blue, we finally have a chapter in her point of view again! It was nice seeing her again, and making sure that she was okay. But um the whole "It's not my problem" is worrying me. I completely understand why she's at that point. But still, not how the Blue I know from the FRLG chapter would act. (I say FRLG 'cause I'm not sure whether or not that's how she would've acted in RGBY. I mean she's had her small arc)

Fucking bastard. I was hoping Blue would somehow turn him down, but I suppose my prediction was correct. He "tricked" her in a way. But I guess I can only hope now that Blue will snap out of it the moment she sees the dexholders and is assured that they are indeed her friends. Seeing as how we already know she is capable of at least breaking free of his grip for a few moments with only the help of her subconsciousness and thoughts. Break free, Blue! You got this!

Also, on the matter with Y. I am so surprised she survived. The was quite a beating in the last chapter. I mean, forcefully being held in the air against her will. With things like Hydro Canon shooting at her. Not to mention the branches and rocks that pummeled her. What a remarkable girl. Even is she had on her suit. Dam. And even still wishing to fight. Is this what it means to be a dexholder? I can hardly imagine. If I break a nail I feel like crying and I start hugging my teddy bear. Well no, I don't do that either. But you get the idea.

But speaking of the time when Blue will have to battle the others. I wonder how that will play out? I wonder what the reactions of the others will be. Especially the ones close to her like Silver, and Red and whatnot. I'm sure that very moment is when my heart will break and I will cry. I'm certainly looking forward to the fluff that will help heal those wounds of mine. But Green's guilt. That will certainly overwhelm me. More than I thought X's guilt over Y's supposed "death' would have. Also, I wonder who's perspective that will be in. Lately it's been a lot of Platinum and Y, but I think it would be great if that battle was in Green's or Blue's point of view. As they were the ones who had the "falling out" in their relationship. Nonetheless, I'm sure it will be quite enjoyable. I cannot wait to read it!

Lackspeed to my babies. Treat them well I beg of you. They deserve all the love in the world. But still I thank you.

The conspiracy! First ORAS copies SA’s Primal Groudon and Primal Kyogre, then XY copies... er... well, I can’t say right now I guess, since you’re not far enough in Destiny. Heh. And yes, of course it’s a Pokemon. Destiny literally begins in Terminus Cave in Kalos. And you do know what’s in that cave, right?

The insecurities of the different Dex Holders are the cause of their different personalities and their situations! Blue, the lonely girl who’s been drifting away from her friends and feeling utter isolation, would have insecurities about her friends. Platinum, the proud girl who have never known defeat previously would have insecurities about her own capabilities after losing multiple times to the same enemy. And what she says is what she would’ve read in a book too. 敗將有口無言, and all. And Y, the new girl, who has a lot to prove and a lot of catching up to do, will have her own insecurities after being absolutely obliterated.

Blue saying “it’s not my problem” is the result of her drifting away so much from her friends and feeling betrayed. In FRLG, it’s subtly revealed that Blue doesn’t remain in contact with anyone other than Silver (since Red and Green had no idea what she was doing in One Island, or what she had been doing), and so if that was to continue for years, and she lets her darker thoughts go rampant, she would end up quickly reverting to her old colder self.

And yep. “Tricked”. Rampancy in AI (which is what Blue’s rampancy is based on) doesn’t require something HUGE happening. It can all start with just a subtle suggestion. And now the struggle begins, between her rampant thoughts and her rational thoughts. Hehehe...

Yep. Y took a hell of a beating... again. And yet she’s still trying to fight. The resiliency of the Dex Holders! ... Also, the resiliency of those who are in the top 5 favorites! In order to be able to fight even after such a beating, you need to be in the top 5 of my favorites. Otherwise... hehe.

Oh, Blue’s upcoming fight against the Dex Holders... it will be quite the journey!

Treat them well, eh? Hmm...

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And so with that, Destiny’s chart is updated!

With the reviewed chapters in the red circle. ... Destiny still doesn’t show a trend, as it is ALL OVER THE PLACE.

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Legacy #007

1) Janecklyn from Specord here :P

Anyway, i really appreciated those "slice of life" chapters and some of the dex holders forming friendships with others outside their region! Makes the stakes higher and the mental problems more heavy.

Aww, jelly X, I have a feeling Jeremy is gonna be important to the plot.

Moon, you goofed up D:

One thing I like of your writing, is that you get the characterization pretty well, most of the time I can tell who's speaking for the lines alone. It tells me that like you love these characters 3

Intense and suspenseful chapter! Will wait for the update 3

Oh. I had no idea that you actually read Legacy. ... It happens if people just don’t review, since I have no other way to know if it’s being actually READ.

Gotta love those “slice of life” things, eh? It’s not always just chaos and catastrophe in the lives of the Dex Holders. Even if they’re always in the middle of one.

X is going to have to compete with Sky Trainer Jeremy! Hehe...

Moon had failed to properly heed Platinum’s warning, and had failed to react fast enough. Ouch.

Hehe. Thank you :) I do try to make each one sound as unique as I can, though some... just... can’t.

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With this one review, Legacy’s chart now looks like...

The red circle was the change, and so now it’s no longer a straight line barring the last chapter’s “anomaly”. Still, the trend is too clear. Legacy will not be getting an update until that dot in the red circle goes up by another 5. And it has the rest of 2019 to do so.

[merlinthoughts]

Season 1 Episode 4 - The Poisoned Chalice

- god fucking dammit here we go again, i'm bloody done with my life and do not, at all, want to see merlin die bc i don't remember anything except that, yeah, he dies and someone has to get off their ass and save the motherfucking day and kiss him

- i realise how much i swear in these posts bc 1. when do i not? 2. i'm emotionally invested 3. i have no other excuse i just like swearing

- AAAND NIMUEHS IN CAMELOT SHE THINKS SHE'S SO SLY WITH HER HEAD THING

- id recognise her in a split second tbfh, she aint subtle

- *heterosexual tension*

- merlins skin be looking so smooth this episode, this boy be wearing lots of Dove

- he looked so excited to be in the banquet, then arthur just fucking slashes him with “not quite” and his hopes and dreams are destroyed

- “wanna see what you’ll be wearing tonight?” arthur says as he's behind the fucking changing curtains, about to get undressed and show merlin his birthday suit

- i honest to god thought that was where he was going, but no, he was just getting something from behind it

- “tonight you’ll be wearing the official ceremonial robes of the servants of camelot” IT'S A FUCKING DRESS ISN'T IT

- aw damn id have preferred a dress

- that smile shared between them was the most adorable scene

- god

- i

- fucking

- love

- their

- smiles 

- sm

- best thing ive ever seen

- i mean… hunty look at that piece of glistening butter beauty

- wow ok back to the episode:

- bros being bros and giving each other a handshake to destroy the mortal enemy pack and put together a family, we stan.

- as if a servant who has only had eye sex with another servant ONCE would trust them enough to say that one of the chalices were poisoned. like??? “ur the only one i could tell” LMAO NO?

- she's a sly fucking dog tfbh

- “if he kills arthur, uthers soul will be broken and camelot will fall” at this rate uther prob wouldn't care if his son dies or not, look at him, he's already mentally broken. he has anxiety and paranoia over magic. child services where u at in the medieval ages?

- i wouldn't believe a word she said, or well, id have believed it was poisoned but id say yeah no damn way you aren't in on it if you know which one it is. bayard wouldn't tell a fucking servant.

- HE'S GONNA SNAP ISN'T HE

- MERLIN FUCKING SNAPPED

- yknow what we say here folks? U DO U MERLIN

- okay i was fine if uther made bayard drink it but like the moment uther said “mmmh… no.” and slowly turned to merlin i think my arteries just crunched together and died so

- “if it is poisoned, he’ll die” HE'S FUCKING SCARED MERLIN WILL PASS AWAY ISN'T HE?

- “it's fine” he says, then starts to fucking choke

- ah fuck he's down

- my boy is down

- FUCK ME SIDEWAYS WITH A CHAINSAW

- ARTHUR CROUCHES NEXT TO HIM LIKE “BB NO”

- lmfao bayard looks so shocked, his face is in disbelief and confusion, he's like who tf done me bad

- arthurs carrying merlin fireman style this is what i live for folks

- did like nobody notice the flower stuck on the inside of the cup? like honestly if you take a sip you’d kinda spot it or perhaps even the person pouring the drinks would have been “is this chamomile tea? no? then what the fuckery-doo is this leaf in here for?” yknow. it's like that scene in Matilda when the angry buff lady completely missed a fucking salamander in her cup when it was the size of her bloody hand. it brings out the same mood honestly

- does gaius have an index for these books or does he just have every page memorised and know exactly what page to go bc I FUCKING NEED THAT it would make bio so much easier if i knew what page it was on instead of looking back and forth from the homework sheet to my textbook, then closing it by accident and having to find the index again for that specific page i need

- arthur wants to fucking go on a life-or-death journey to save merlin i've never been so happy

- this is honestly my favourite episode, like it may be really fucking angsty but i love it so much

- arthur betrays his dad and leaves his room even after being told not to just so he can save a servants life is literally my new moto

- NO IT WON'T LOAD MY NETFLIX IS STUCK ON 99%

- okay so while i'm waiting for my shit to load, i just discovered the new fucking tumblr rule starting dec 17 and i'm like 0.2 inches away from just spamming NSFW pics on here just for laughs

- like hunty, that won't stop people from posting elsewhere or for thinking about sex bc like??? whatchu gonna do tumblr?? get the fbi to erase it from our minds

- i think nOT thot

- watch me get flagged for just using the fucking term “NSFW”

- i'm gonna end up asterisking everything (is asterisking a word? wow it has red under it so like probably not but i just added it to my dictionary so uhh it is now)

- by asterisking i dont mean furry kin shit ew no

- i mean like N*FW, s*x, t*mblr, m*rthur

- god it took me like 20 minutes to calibrate my fucking wifi and fix the connection problem

- wow the stage for the poison increased by 75% in 30 mins, damn

- merlins like like having a conniption on his bed lmao, chanting arthurs name and sweating lot

- do we ever find out how uther gets that scar bc i'm like 100% positive arthur was a little child and swayed his fucking sword too hard just as uther rounded the corner. the sword then collided into his fucking brain and destroyed a good part of his intelligence, targeting especially his morals on how to accept people and how to be a good father

- that’s my theory

- merlin starts talking enchantments in his sleep while gwens watching, and gaius is just there like wtf merlin ur blowing ur cover “oh! gwen!! uhhh sorry. he’s just... in a latin study group in his pastime and has an oral presentation in minutes”

- omg, nimueh, stfu

- i didn't know dinosaurs existed back then, this reptile be whack

- y’know what's funny? ppl thinking dinosaurs didn’t exist. i find creationism very very very intriguing bc how fucking stupid could you be

- that sword throw was faker than my moms tits

- arthur could have done better

- k but like what if merlin’s hand wasn’t under the covers? like he was just throwing that blue ball around right in front of gwen

- can arthur like not hear her? nimuehs literally enchanting the rocks right behind his ear lobes and arthur acts nothing of it until those said rocks collapse and he gasps and suddenly he realises shes evil

- also his fucking hair in this scene looks glorious. perhaps bc it's pushed back rather than his bowl cut, but its doing things to my abdomen

- i thought for a second she was pulling off her mask to say “nimueh” and arthur was gasping bc he only recognised her after her hair was shown, just like in that scene with joker and harvey in the hospital

- OH RIGHT THE SPIDERS I LIKE COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT THOSE SONS OF A GUNS

- i’d be dead if those spiders came crawling up to eat me lmfao

- k so nimueh went from :) to >:D in half a second

- i'm smelling up those symbolisms, boys

- watch out pals cause here are some of them:

- merlin is the LIGHT of arthur’s life

- he LIGHTS up the party

- he gives arthur a BRIGHTER future

- he's the GUIDE for his path

- hahhahahaha

- i'm serious when i say i have a huge fear of insects (spiders count in that too, no discrimination) so i'm just putting that there, saying to yall id be fucking terrified

- gaius would be so confused, like we don't see his face here but merlins close-up sweaty concentrated frown, but he’s literally just screaming “ARTHUR!!” “FASTERRR!!” “YESS!!” “CLIMB!!!” gaius would be looking like he walked into something he wasn't supposed to. prob thinking he should just let the kid die so he doesn’t have to deal with this shit anymore

- UTHER LOCKED HIS SON AWAY I'M FUCKING QUESTIONING HIS PARENTING SKILLS

- that's grounding???? throwing ur child in prison???

- yes 999 can i have child services on his ass

- gwens so smart honestly i love her

- pretending to be a maiden for the food, god what a queen

- arthur buying it and saying “yuck you say this is food?! disgustang!”

- the fact that i misspelled disgusting but it autocorrected to disgustang (which is originally what i wanted but autocorrect shouldn’t have known) makes me consider if i should really check my dictionary…. who knows what words are on there

- they’re so smart

- and then this fucker ruins it all while eating his food, checking her out and saying yeah arthurs a prick, hyuck hyuck, realising only that wait fuck u aint the maiden

- how’d they know GWEN was the one not supposed to have delivered the food, what if it was that chick right there???

- welll….. maybe it's because gwen took her sweet time up those steps, staring as if she couldn’t blink at the guards below

- i forget what happens at the end of this episode besides the kiss, and there's like 9 minutes left my fingers may rot at this point

- wake him up! wake him up!

- OH WAIT HE DOESN'T FUCKING WAKE UP DOES HE AND EVERYONE PANICS

- YEAH OKAY I'M SEEING THAT NOW

- MERLIN STOPPED BREATHING

- LMAO GWEN IS IN TEARS

- “HE'S DEAD” SHE SAYS

- ARTHUR BB COME IN HERE TO KISS UR HUBBY ALIVE

- OH WAIT UR IN FUCKING PRISON

- WAIT UP, HE'S ALIVE AND SHE KISSES HIM AFTERWARDS????

- FUCK ME I THOUGHT FOR THE WHOLE EPISODE THE KISS HAPPENED BC HE COULDN'T WAKE UP THAT'S FUCKING WITH ME I DIDN'T KNOW

- i keep forgetting to switch up the cap locks, sorry if it seems im screaming im legit using my inside voice for most of the time just emphasizing my words a little more

- goddamn, everytime they say mercia i just think of “murica”, like those americans on the 7th of july or whatever date the “we love our country” day is, chanting it as they throw around beers and fireworks as people gather round in jerseys or crop tops

- it's not that hard to spot the european on here

- the most celebrated holiday here which contains a lot of beers and big pub gatherings (besides every fucking night honestly) is either new years, lowkey stereotypically correct saint patricks, and ig easter monday but that's more for the kiddos

- i mean ofc christmas and all that shit but im not the most devoted christian, i just like presents and small gatherings among good friends

- wow okay it wasn't the 7th of july

- i mean at first i looked up “USA day” (i couldn’t remember the name) and it popped up today’s date, and i was like no thats not it at all. dec?? its in like july i think. and i was close! it was july 4th.

- uther damn knows it's nimueh!!!

- i mean, he just overheard morgana and arthur talk about it, and initiated himself into a convo about it once morgana left, as his sneaky ass just slithered up like “hey man, u know that woman? yeah uhh, what she say? anything about me? no? k i know who it is tho”

- i thought he was going to apologize or like explain to arthur what's the sitch, but he just waits for five whole seconds before saying. “those who practice magic know only evil. they despise and seek to destroy goodness wherever they find it.”

- arthur, confused: sounds as if you know her

- uther, walking away: i do

- arthur:

- wow k lots of fucking quotes here cause it's the merthur reunion

- get ready babs

- arthur: still alive then?

- merlin: oh yes, just about… i understand i have you to thank for that

- arthur, leaning on the chair merlin is sitting in, stifling a smile: ah it's nothing, a half-decent servant is hard to come by. i was only dropping by to make sure you’re alright… i.... expect you to be back to work tomorrow

- merlin, watching arthur as he slightly walks away having embarrassed himself: arthur... thank you

- arthur, slowly: you too

- they stare for like 5 whole seconds

- arthur, uncomfortable: well… get some rest

- there we go folks: my eulogy.

- hope someone reads it at my funeral