#theyve got a bad sense of humor

[kingdoms-and-empires]

Adoriel's Tears Review

I recently had to go travel and read a few works that I never got around to reading but was interested in.

PLEASE REMEMBER THIS REVIEW IS DONE BY ME AS A READER AND IS MY OWN OPINION.

This means I will review in accordance to my own tastes, how the game caters to me, and what I feel. Do not take my word as gospel, what I may not be interested in or dislike, may be what YOU are interested and love!!!

@adoriels-tears-if

Synopsis:

Adoriel's Tears are a gift.

A light offered to the inhabitants of Terrybiël to end the conflicts that oppress the Four Peoples and eradicate the evil that was crawling on the continent.

But every light has its shadow and sometimes gifts are poisonous. For if magic comes from the heart, it takes a soul to master it, and fortunate are those who manage to find it. Without a counterpart, without a familiar, a Tear is nothing.

Just a curse. A child of madness. The darkness on Terrybiël. What must be destroyed before they destroy you.

Adoriel's Tears are a gift. At least for the others.

You're long past the point where your heart and soul should be singing together, and yet you're gifted. That's what made you lose everything you had as a child. Now, an opportunity presents itself. Should you take it, is it the right thing to do?

Without a soul and with a magic you can't control, the journey will be a risky one.

Especially since the smell of madness and blood is getting heavier and heavier on Terrybiël. Will you be able to fix everything, to find what you're looking for? Nothing is less sure.

And yet, this voice is calling you, whispering:

Come ! Come to me ! Come to me and don't be afraid.

Review:

The Good: Tobias is Ken, do not fight me on this.

Also, i wasnt aware what Snow was until i looked it up:

SO FREAKING CUTE!

Anyways, I had a lot of fun with this one. It lures you into a false sense of security and wholesomeness only to abruptly show the player and MC the reality of the world. That their mother had been protecting them for a reason. The family dynamics, relationships between characters, and drama crafted got me in my feels enough to care! I also got to name my plushie rabbit Optimus Prime, which was fucking hilarious:

Also i had alot of fun with the parental drama the MC can have with their father

Ashleyn:

And with his fuckboi bros:

Adoriel's Tears does that thing really well, that thing that lets the reader fill in the blanks and make up their own assumptions for the characters until we actually meet them. Plus it lets us act out and be brats so we can break the hearts of all the adults around us that try their best!

Also there's moments like this:

That honestly just adds that bit of humor that works without cause friction for the rest of the tone.

There was also a specific passage that felt emotionally charged and intense. Youll know what im talking about once you reach it, because it is very memorable. Without spoiling, it feels like justice coming forth to smite those that have wronged you.

The Bad: I know that Chapter 1 is a transfer from the original Choicescript, and it shows. The author has already expressed wanting to polish and clean it up, which i think is the right step as the second chapter and onwards have a clear jump in quality. There were numerous spelling and grammatical errors, but given that chapter 1 is four years old, and that the author is not a native English speaker (is French) that can be excused and fixed. I was able to submit errors I came across, so the author will be able to fix what i found in a future update. I do recommend that those who play any IF out there to submit anything they find as authors need us to beta test! Their eyes literally begin to glaze over the words theyve seen for the thousandth time lol.

The Ugly: I encountered moments where the MC feels very sensitive and too friendly, or the opposite where the choices can give an extreme negative reaction in response. I'd like for the inclusion of a more middle ground MC. In addition to that, there where times where my immersion (self insert, remember) broke as my boy MC felt too "feminine" without letting us choose to act it or not. Idk how to describe it other than that lol, but it stood out to me.

The Aftermath: I would recommend this to anyone that wants a good family dynamic/drama, and if characters and their relationships with each other are important to you. There's a lot of promise, potential, and "oh shit" moments that can/will happen (18+ tag, remember?) that only leaves me wanting more. The worldbuilding done allows for some really gripping story telling, and from what we see so far, itll impact the story. Seriously, the worldbuilding here is unique, and WILL stand out as we keep seeing the same ole same ole elsewhere in this genre. It's a fantasy story that keeps itself grounded by using likable characters who have realistic flaws that provide entertainment for us.

[mapsofnonexistentplaces]

do you take your ocs for that ask game .. isel

WHY NOT itd be funny to do that

favorite thing about them

i like that hes jsut like the worlds sluttiest oldest 30 year old man who talks in the most obtuse overdone way and everyone loves him for it. except that some people hate him for it. hes a funny guy

least favorite thing about them

hmm hard to say because all his flaws are like. specifically very interesting to me. like the way hes pushy with others and secretive about very basic details about himself are technically things to hold grievances with and he does kind of eat shit about it sometimes but its like. yuuup dudes traumatised and has very underdeveloped coping skills it makes sense....

uh actually i do have an answer. i hate how much he lives in my mind like literally if any of my friends ever ask me like "oh name a character" my first thought will indubitably be ISEL "oh who should i draw" ISEL i dont like him and i hate him actually. for being so handsome and nice

favorite line

ones at the front of my mind come from a play scene i edited last night. i like it when hes mean

brOTP

i think his connection with freya is sweet. codependent guys with god complexes, isel acting as a sort of dying ringmaster directing freya and also protecting her.... theyve got some baggage between them but they do care for each other so much

OTP

sigh him and olzhas will forever be famous to me their arcs are so entwined and they were very precisely designed to like. complimentary to one another. ive written so much about the meta between them its complicated but theyre annoying and they love each other and it rules

mazin and isel is also very personally funny to me because it feels like basically the only humorous "guys who hate each other" ship and also because i think the idea of isel of all people being mazin's introduction to bicuriosity would hurt him

i also think the hypothetical isel olzhas thuyết polycule is worthwhile. pretentious old men who will argue with each other about anything. its fine

nOTP

hmm aside for like. evidently weird ones. i dont think i can call any hypothetical pairing between him and anyone else bad i think theyre all funny in some way.

random headcanon

hmm treating this as an opportunity to think of my favorite trivia about him. i think his hobby in like. maintaining old music for himself and being all old-fashioned about record players and the genres of music he likes is cutes

unpopular opinion

i think hes ugly or something

song i associate with them

so many.... found this specific song earlier today so ill share this one

favorite picture of them

i think he looks cute here i like his expression a lot.... i like pictures of him where his like. a stupid little joker facade is lessened

[ofallthingsnasty]

Oooh ok lemme tell you my lil yandere Aizawa thoughts? Bc why not, they've been bouncing around my head for a moment?

But he doesn't even realize how far he's fallen for them until shit hits the fan? I'm thinking the darling is a barista at a 24hr coffee shop, someplace he frequents on his night patrol? It sorta started out as something normal, just a dude getting his coffee. It slowly turns into him taking his breaks there at the coffee shop, grabbing something to eat the chat more with the barista. They're just so chatty because quite frankly he's the only person that's been in at this hour and they're bored.

So it turns into a nightly ritual where they both sit in a booth snarking away at this or that because theyve both sorta got the same sense of weird humor. Aizawa doesn't even realize he's falling for them even when he's causally thinking "oh I wonder if y/n likes this sort of takeout? Maybe I could bring it tonight". He doesn't even realize subconsciously he doesn't even both going to that coffee shop on the nights they have off.

Course bad guys come in; maybe they're connected with a case Aizawa is behind, or maybe the darling is just in the wrong place at the wrong time. But he comes in for his nightly (not a date) coffee and sees the place trashed and sorta just goes on a rampage. These bad guys didn't think a pro would be anywhere near the scene anytime soon so their trails pretty fresh.

And after taking down this entire gang he find his darling tied up, gaged and blindfolded in one of those heavy duty dog cages, and he's just stuck staring because there you are. He was so scared that he wouldn't be in time to save you. In fact, he didn't even call in the incident in the first place, he just reacted.

To him, you look so small, curled in on yourself as much as you can in this cage. And he just sorta reacts? Picks up the cage and gets outta there, just leaving behind a bunch of bodies for some poor idiot to find another day.

And like. When he gets you home, it's not. Immediately he takes you out, no he's got to prepare a little bit? In fact, the thought of you needing his protection had crossed his mind, but never to this extent. So it's a cobbled together "bedroom" for you. He takes his bed and anything he thinks you might like that he has on hand and shoves it in the basement that he's never used. And only then hes starting to "unlock" that cage for you. Really just putting on a show of unlocking it so you know someone's there again.

When he reaches for you, whenever you feel the touch of a hand your jerking back and forth wildly, scared out of your mind, but it's not too much a deterant as he just pulls you out before slipping of your blindfold. Oh if he hadn't been in love before he would have fallen for you again in that moment, your eyes so scared before melting into heartbreaking relief at the sight of him. Your sob and throw yourself into his chest and he just pulls you in and strokes your hair.

He hasn't even untied you, and your sobs and muffled by the fabric tied in your mouth, but your too far gone to recognize anything but a hero in front of you and he just holds you as your shaking starts to calm down. He's heart breaks when you start chanting garbled thank yous into his chest. It's not for a moment until you've calmed down enough for him to untie you fully, and your practically limp in his arms.

From there, it's so easy for him to convince you that you were being targeted; that you needed to stay with him for your own protection. Your eating up his lies with full acceptance, nodding along that of course you'd stay.

And you do, unquestionably. At first. But by the time you start to catch onto things he's had all the time he's needed to fully lockdown and stafeguard your home. You never even fully suspected something amiss until the basement door that had been unlocked your entire stay is suddenly locked. You think it's just an accident so when Aizawa comes down to sit you gently on the bed to explain things have changed a bit (for the better he says, for your protection he says) you think he's joking until your cuffed to the bed as he goes about the final renovations to your prison cell, ones too obvious to get by under your nose.

And he's just so gentle the entire time, he's planned for this. Your acting logically, like a kitten in a new home. Of course everything is scary and new. But it's fine, you'll both be happy soon. He'll make sure of it.

Oops I wrote a lot my baddddd, plus it's late AF for me so like. This is definitely smth that's a train of thought vs actually thought out ppft

Tell me what u think?

Oh… this is so soft, omg 🥺 thank you for this - I swear I got a little teary when reader hugged him 😭 This is just.. the perfect yandere. Good intentions but still incredibly possessive. I don't even know what else to add to this, but I really loved the kitten motif here 👀

How terrible that must have been for him - he nearly got his heart ripped out of his chest, nearly lost you. Can you blame for never wanting to let go of you ever again? You’ve been hurt like this once, who is to say it won’t happen again? He can barely stand your tears and begging once you catch on what he’s been doing, really, it breaks something deep within him. And he understands, knows that this shouldn’t be the solution but he can’t help himself. He really tries to make the transition to living with him easier - he’ll get you a few books of authors you enjoy, some supplies for crafts you like, small trinkets to hold onto. And he’s patient. So incredibly patient with you. Never punishes you when you slap him, bite him, try to scratch your way out of his arms (because that’s what you do with feral kittens, right? Just shower them with love until they learn to accept and enjoy it.) He misses your old self, those careless nights and late coffees and the conversations - he wants those back, desperately so, but life isn’t fair. Some day you’ll be as carefree as before but for now keeping you safe is his top priority. But I think with time, he learns to enjoy the new power dynamic as well. It feels good to protect you like that, to be able to ensure you’re completely safe. Confusing, isn’t it? On one hand he wants to go back, on the other you’re cute like this, too. Maybe he can have both. Maybe he can put you in adorable little outfits and come home to a warm meal after a hard day at work, maybe you can laugh and talk over dinner and he can he have you underneath him, absolutely wrecking you. Also, you can't tell me he wouldn't get a little... freaky with it. He's a grown man, he has pined after you for so long, he has developed some urges as well. He has a penchant for the cuter, simpler things in life and putting you in a little frilly collar in your favorite color? God, he mentally sheds a tear when he makes you put it on for the first time. It fits you, he thinks - you're feisty yet so delicate when compared to him. He really has found his perfect match and he's never letting go of you.

[reveristcalicocan]

I saw your requests we open so hear me out:

Reader got a cryo vision at a very young age, and idk in my head people who get cryo visions have had to harden themselves against the work like the tsaritsa has. This plays into that.

Reader has always masked what they were really feeling. Most people owuld call them charming and good humored, but (individually) Zhongli, childe and diluc have always been able to sense something else.

THEN one day they get hit by an empathy spell and are almost knocked onto their knees when they see reader and feel an ocean of anger/hurt/resentment flowing from them. Reader doesn't know theyve been hit by the spell so they try to dodge the questions and its just an angst fest all around

If this is too specific dw about it, I just wanted to get this thoight outta my head

This is definitely one of the most difficult requests i’ve received, i’m kind of in a writers block for genshin right now so i only did Zhongli. If i feel like it i’ll write another one for childe and diluc too. But for now this is it!

:><:><:><:

Your shaky hands clutched the glowing blue crystal as you cried to yourself. Lifeless bodies of your family members lay before you, painting your home a deep red. You remember shaking them begging for them to stop acting and wake up.

It’s been many years since then and you’ve dedicated most of your time into work. Work that is to get to the bottom of your family’s death…

ZHONGLI

The sound of cutlery filled the air as you enjoyed dinner with some of your colleagues. Laughter filling the air as you made another joke. A permanent fake smile plastered onto your face. After the jokes and laughter died down, some started discussing about work.

“Ah speakin’ of i just received a case about a recent murder from one of my clients. Family dead, they barely survived themself. Think you might be interested.”

Your eyes widened a noticeable amount, a neat file of papers being passed to you from across the table.

“r-right, thanks a lot! I should go look into it now…” You excused yourself from the table.

The walk back to your house was a long one. An uneasiness following you.

“I’m back…” you locked the door behind you, expecting Zhongli to great you with a hug but instead you were met with the sound of glass shattering.

Standing in the kitchen, Zhongli stared at you with sad eyes, an overwhelming amount of hurt and anger radiating off of you.

How could he not have realised it before? He knew you were hiding some things… but the sheer power of your emotions were enough to throw anyone off guard. Had you been feeling like this the entire time? How long have you been keeping it bottled up?

He hadn’t realised you were right in front of him until you shook his shoulders lightly.

“Zhongli? Is everything alright?” You placed the back of your hand on his head, a stupid move but you did it anyways.

“I… are you okay?” You were shocked that he had redirected the question towards you.

Last time you checked he was the one who dropped the glass mug and stood there in shock.

“Heh of course! Why woul-” You crossed your arms over your chest, brushing off his intense gaze.

“What happened? Back then in the past? Why are you… sad? You never told me about your parents before… did they do something to make you this angry?”

Your mouth hung open as you tried to say something. He was looking at you with something you’d never seen before. Was it sympathy? or understanding? maybe pity?

Clearing your throat, you plastered on your fake smile once again.

“Did you drink anything funny or eat some bad food? You’re acting rather different today?” Instead of answering those questions, you had tried to divert the conversation to hopefully make him forget.

“Tell me, you can tell me.” Zhongli took a step forward, you took two steps back.

Fear and unease settling in your stomach once you realised he wasn’t going to give up. How did he even know you were hurt or angry? You thought you did a great job at hiding those emotions.

“it’s nothing! just work…” You sweat dropped as he continued to bombard you with questions.

“no it’s not you- I just… my parents-” Your eyes widened.

You had promised yourself not to bring up what happened to your parents a long time ago. You didn’t any to reopen the wound you worked so hard to heal.

“Your parents? what about them?” Zhongli continued to pursue the topic.

Swallowing hard, you racked your brain for an excuse.

“M-my parents um they just… they’re getting a divorce!” You yelled out the last part.

Breathing heavily, you watched as Zhongli backed away a little. Had he really believed you?

“is that so…?” He mumbled to himself.

“mhm, i’m going to bed now… see you”

[damistrolls]

2, 31, 33, 34 for Lyydia <333 and possum

Lyydia

2. Can your oc play any instruments? Have they ever wanted to learn how to play any? Why?

i've always imagined her being able to fiddle tbh, so lets say she can play violin :]

17. How well can your oc keep secrets? Is there a difference between how they handle their own vs someone else’s? To what lengths would they go to keep something hidden?

oh she can keep secrets really well, both hers and other people's. she loves gossip, but if she was asked not to tell anyone about something, she really will keep it to herself. she WILL lie for u too, shes ride or die

31. What is your oc’s sense of humour like? What do they find funny? Do they try to be funny? Are they actually?

i dont know what her sense of humor is like, but it's pretty easy to make her laugh. i think clever humor probably gets her the most though, like the jokes u have to think about for a couple seconds before u get it. i think she does try and be funny sometimes, and id say her jokes usually go over pretty well, but shes no class clown or anything

33. How does your oc’s own perception of themselves compare to how other people see them? Is your oc aware that other people see them differently (if it’s different)?

i think that despite knowing how capable she is, she tends to look down on herself quite a bit. she feigns confidence really well, but she genuinely worries about how people see her and what they think. meanwhile, i dont think theres a single person out there who's met her and dislikes her

34. How easily does your oc throw something away? As soon as something is through with its usefulness, or are they more like a hoarder? Is there a reason?

its a little hard for her to throw things out. i wouldnt say she's a hoarder, but she does like keeping things, even when they're no longer useful, especially if theyve got some sentimental value to them. still, she won't hold onto EVERYTHING, and throws shit out if necessary

Possum

2. Can your oc play any instruments? Have they ever wanted to learn how to play any? Why?

yeah! possum can play the guitar. he stole one off of someone and taught himself how to play. its a good way to pass the time. he doesnt sing along when he plays if other people are around though

31. What is your oc’s sense of humour like? What do they find funny? Do they try to be funny? Are they actually?

ehh, he doesnt really crack jokes, and jokes typically have no effect on him. he doesnt have much of a sense of humor at all, though he'll sometimes let out an amused snort if he sees something bad happen to someone. schadenfreude might be the only way to get him to laugh tbh

33. How does your oc’s own perception of themselves compare to how other people see them? Is your oc aware that other people see them differently (if it’s different)?

possum sees himself as being extremely smart and capable, while most others tend to underestimate him. prior to coming to the ranch, he honestly counted on people underestimating him, but now, he's a little frustrated by it (not that he'd really say anything about it)

34.How easily does your oc throw something away? As soon as something is through with its usefulness, or are they more like a hoarder? Is there a reason?

possum almost never keeps anything superfluous. he doesnt like the idea of having a bunch of useless items laying around. despite having been safe at the ranch for a long time now, he refuses to fully put down roots, and would be ready to leave at a moment's notice

[mapsofnonexistentplacesremade]

QUESTIONSSSS (you can pick and choose I intentionally put a lot of them)

1 and 41 for Olja 2 for all of Cassiopea, Dalisay and Beatrix 6 for Freya, Somsak and Marjolaine 7 THE GHOSTS 👍 13 Isel and Valerie 37 Peixin

DOING ALL OF THESE. HEH

1. What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do? (olzhas)

god probably like 5 minutes. e's usually extremely organised about eir day (to the point where like first thing e does in the morning is arrange a schedule/checklist of things to do) and in like the little moments where e's got nothing to do e will just run through things e's been working on and just like. progress from where e last left off even if it wasn't in the day's plan. conversely when e's like in a situation where e just Has to sit still and do nothing e'll get extremely antsy and stressed. like e hates waiting in line for things and will just like. complain to emself in eir mind about it. just gets soo annoyed

41. How do they feel about children? (olzhas)

oughh e's got the thing where e like. believes e's a bad influence and is just irrationally scared of coming into contact with them but e's like quite literally one of the most responsible people out of the entire cast and could like. decently look after a child. e's not fond of very young kids but like. e's got that 'really good grade school teacher' type temperament and is consciously way less abrasive around younger people than e is with anyone else just because e's like. very aware of eir position as an older guy who has the ability to maintain maturity even if the younger person e's talking to can't. and e's not like mean about it. thinking about it textually e is very attentive to like. somsak and dalisay in that precise way. though theyre older teens so it is just like. general respect for young people i think. i do think the entire teacher comparison is apt like e could not stand to be a primary caretaker but would both like. be good at and enjoy just supporting children in a more auxiliary manner

2. How easy is it for your character to laugh? (freya, olzhas, isel, dalisay, beatrix)

OUGHH okay so. freya and isel both have the thing of just like. being overly jolly and whimsical all the time. will literally just laugh in the middle of a conversation, whether because they just like randomly remember something funny or quite literally just to fill empty air. and theyre just kind of like that naturally but its like even worse when theyre together because theyre trying to make each other laugh and theyve got like. very good sense about it. they'll just drop in an inside joke and the other will howl with laughter soooo fucking easily and they will make each other laugh by laughing. so its just the worst ouroboros ever.

olzhas is kind of an outlier in cassiopeia in that regard because e likes to be all serious and most of like. the 'laughing' e does casually is sarcastic or dismissive. just like a heh when someone says something stupid to em. BUT when e's with isel and freya e's just completely touched by their senses of humor. so much so e's just regularly brought to tears or lightheadedness over stupid bits. niceys to me....

dalisay is the type of person to like. rarely laugh out loud but sie actually is humored really easily by completely innocuous things. often just hir own thoughts are enough to get hir to smile but like. it takes a lot to even get hir to giggle. stupid programming jokes are often what works

beatrix laughs super easily but its often like. ingenuine or just an absentminded thing he does without much thought. will laugh very easily at very stupid jokes told by anyone though and hes a bit embarrassed about it

6. Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable? (freya, somsak, marjolaine)

WELL considering somsak broke multiple to get onto the train i think none of them mean anything to him. freya's also generally just like. 'follows the rules so long as they benefit her' type person, but once one gets in the way she will like. find a way to tiptoe around it. she kind of just finds the overall idea of like 'oh yeah heres immutable things you MUST follow because some greater authority said so' kind of stupid so. again doesnt have much respect for rules in general if they dont make sense to her.

marjolaine though.... kind of touchy for him lol. has the thing of being just like. compete coward pacifist type guy and will just hide between frameworks. would probably bring them up if someone goes against them but will also like. disobey the same one and expect nobody to comment on it. just weird contradictions...

7. What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling? (fornax ghosts)

HEY. answering this one some other time because ill have to think about it and get sad but as a general blanket answer just like. stuff that reminds them of where they used to live. like cas will always just adore crowded cities thuyết will always be deeply fond of seaside views.... everyone has probably spent some time just like visiting their hometowns and stuff through fornax and its very bittersweet.

13. What color do they think they look best in? Do they actually look best in that color? (isel, valerie)

GOD isel has a stupid thing where he probably thinks he looks great in like. green or something. but he's like "oh its such a good color on me i have to save it for special occasions. i can wear a green dress once a year to dazzle everyone" whatever the fuck and its just like. completely mid in the end. people are way too used to him wearing warm colors. so am i

valerie is a bit more sensible about it and indeed thinks like. pinks and purples are good on them. is probably very particular about shades like theyre picky about their purples being blue-ish and the pinks leaning on magenta, usually doesnt like very faint pastel tones... shit like that. but they can balance practically anything and make it look nice haha

37. Do they have a system for remembering names, long lists of numbers, things that need to go in a certain order (like anagrams, putting things to melodies, etc)? (peixin)

hmm i think its a bit less straightforward and its like. they will remember things IF they apply a weird rhythm to the way they list things. weird thing to explain so i will be blunt about it its based on a thing i have where i can just instinctually tell if i have listed 8 of something because my inflection changes due to like. compulsions of having to count to 8 and i just slip into it when listing stuff mentally. so probably has something like that LOL doesnt really have any tricks for remembering specifics but is good with amounts

[aclosetfan]

This is a really incomplete idea BUT it’s about Brick’s hat(s). And hopefully someone else finds this and enjoys it! More under the cut, it’s a long post :)

I think it’d be funny if boomer and butch get him a shitty novelty hat for birthday/holidays/etc because 1) they don’t know what to get him 2) they’re like 12 with four buck to their names. so they just go from charity shop to charity shop looking for ideas. Brick probably doesn’t ask for much (I don’t think any of them do. poor kid syndrome amiright? I personally never think they’d be well off in childhood).

So anyway butch and boomer are bumming through the charity shops and boomers like:

“Holy shit, Butch!”

“Wut?” Butch looked over pulling the charred and ruined Halloween mask that someone had donated for god knows what reason off his head.

“Dude it’s perfect!” Boomer came running from three aisle over, waving a garment around in the air.

“It’s a hat.” Butch pointed out bluntly, unimpressed, and pointed to the mask atop his head, “I think we should get this.”

“But it’s red!”

“He’s got one of those. Wears it frequently.”

“But not like this!” Boomer boosted, “See.”

Boomer turned the hat around, so Butch could see the bill of it. It was one of those novelty snapbacks, inscribed on the front was the playboy bunny logo.

“Dude.” Butch smiled, giggling with Boomer, albeit a little nervously.

He was familiar with the playboy bunnies work, it wasn’t like he was a virgin or anything (except he secretly was), but he had never actually seen a genuine centerfold spread like some of the older boys at the detention hall had talked about. When he thought of playboy, he thought of the Victoria Secret models he saw plastered to the side of the store at the mall. They made him feel weird and his hands would get all sweaty, so he tried his best not to look too closely.

“Dude we should get him this!” Boomer continued to smile, “It’d be, like, so funny.”

“Yeah.” Butch nodded, as his smile grew. He didn’t 100% get why it was so funny, but the idea of having something with the playboy bunny logo on it seemed cool to him. It made him feel kind of like one of the older boys.

Him and Boomer snickered all the way to the cash register, and when it was their turn to pay, Boomer nudged him ahead, ducking behind him with a giggle. He glared at his brother over his shoulder, but allowed Boomer to twist a nervous hand into the fabric of his oversized sweater (the one his brothers had bought him last year. They bought it 3 sizes too big cause he kept growing out of everything too fast. It was 1 size too big now). Boomer liked latching onto their sleeves when he got nervous.

He didn’t get what the big baby was so nervous about though. They were just buying a stupid hat. The lady cashier watched them with thinly veiled boredom and Butch threw the hat down on the counter.

Raising a penciled on eyebrow, the older women examined the hat, “Playboy, huh? You even know what Playboy is kid?”

The question made the back of his neck burn. He had never heard a lady say playboy before, it was weird. From behind him, Boomer pressed his face into the back of his sweater to muffle another giggle.

“Uh, duh.” He sniffed, “We know, lady.”

“Have you actually seen a playboy before?” The cashier snorted, ringing them up, “Not just the logo?”

“Yes!” Butch huffed, defending himself, “The Internet!”

(It was a semi-lie—they had tried looking it up on the internet, but Fuzzy didn’t have a computer at his cabin, HIM wouldn’t let them use any of his flashy spy monitors, Mojo was lame, and the library had parent controls)

“Surreee.” The lady drawled out and rang them up, “Dollar fifty.”

He didn’t make eye contact with her as he handed over a crumpled dollar bill and took two quarters from the take-a-penny-leave-a-penny. When she gave them back the hat, they ran out of the store like they had committed a bank robbery.

When Brick opened the present two days later, he threw the plastic bag it had come in to the side and frowned.

“A new hat?”

“Yeah,” Boomer nodded, putting down the cheap Polaroid camera Butch and Brick had shoplifted from a secondhand shop downtown (still too expensive to actually buy), and reached for the hat, turning it around in Brick’s hand, “but look!”

Brick’s smile grew, as the logo registered in his head. “Oh, shit,” their brother laughed, “is this playboy?”

“Betcha you won’t wear it.” He goaded his brother on as he tossed the new (used—looked like it was taken from Pokay High’s sports department) rugby ball from hand to hand.

“Betcha I will.” Brick shot back, carefully removing the ratty cap he had had since forever and replacing it with the new one.

“Sorta big.” Their brother murmured, adjusting the strap.

“Your fat head will grow into it!” Butch joked and Brick punched his arm.

“Shut up, dipshit.”

“Do you like it?” Boomer beamed, ignoring the bickering.

Brick looked at their brother with a smile, precious anger dissipating, “Yeah, dude, it’s funny.”

———————————————————

Then it becomes a thing//like Brick really loves his hat collection:

“Truckin’ ain’t easy.” Brick read out loud with a snort, and replaced the hat he was wearing with the new one.

He thought for a moment then shook his head no, “nah. Not today.”

He had so many hats to chose from, it was almost overwhelming. They were all basically offensive on every level and he tried to wear them all as often as possible. The highlight reel included:

Kitty gang

Swag.

Yolo.

Lmao.

Weed jokes. Lotta weed jokes.

Thrasher.

Fish love me. Woman fear me.

Met god. She’s hot.

Blow me for luck.

Beer drinkers get more head.

The carpets do match the drapes

FuCk

Birthday Bitch

Deadass fuck thots on god

Hello I am Mr. Cunt

Master Baiter

Drive fast. Eat ass.

At 17, he had a vibrant hat collection. Anytime his brother’s saw a red hat with a shitty gag, they snagged it for him. Recent political events had bestowed upon his brothers a plethora of new material:

Make racists afraid again.

My other hat’s tin foil

Made you look

The list went on. His fuck cops wasn’t popular with local authorities. And how could he forget his most favorite powderpuff girl cap. That pissed them off to no end.

“Brick!” Butch yelled down the corridor. They were at Mojo’s this week, “Hurry up!”

“Uuhhhhh,” he mumbled to himself, as he stared at his wall, ignoring his brother. He hung them all up to make it easier to chose. His collection covered the wall.

His hand floated left to the one that said FuCk, but the one that said bad hair day caught his eye and his hand twitched to the right, “uuuuuhh, hmmmm.”

He floated toward the ceiling to look at the top of the wall, “welllllll...”

They’d be fighting with the girls today and because he liked making Blossom mad, he figured he needed to chose something more crude.

“Oh my god!” Butch cried outside his bedroom door, “Just fucking pick one!”

“Mmmmm.”

“Brick!” Butch pounded on his door, “I swear to god, I’ll burn them all if you just don’t pick one!”

“HMMmmmmmm!”

“Brick, it’s been thirty minutes!” Boomer whined, joining Butch, “The girls are waiting, we can’t cancel on them again! We’re bad guys, but we aren’t bad guys.”

“Ahhhhh—“ he sucked on his teeth in thought, “five more minutes!”

His brothers groaned in unison from the other side of the door.

“This is your fault, Boomer.” Butch whined.

“How?!” Boomer protested.

“Cause I wanted to get him that mask.”

————————————————————

His hat—his first hat—is lovingly preserved. He can’t risk losing it or damaging it any further. Before they started buying him new hats, most of the boys misadventures (the chaos they did NOT plan) were dedicated to saving Brick’s hat from the clutches of (insert one-shot villain here). It’s his security blanket. He breaks it out on the lazy days in.

He does though often lose his novelty hats. A violent gust of wind will rip one from his hat or a fight will cause it to disintegrate. But because Brick considers being the hat guy a personality trait, I think he’d have a spare one on hand at all times:

“My hat!” He cried, as the tornado-like monster blew through Townsville, ripping his hat from his head, and then disappeared into thin air, “the fucker took my hat!”

“Brick!” Blossom cried over the wind, “calm down! It’s a hat!”

“Yeah my hat!” He argued back. He wasn’t fond of the idea that him and his brothers and the girls now had to cooperate with each other, but desperate times called for desperate measures. “Butch! Boomer! I want my hat!” He hissed and his brothers nodded, understanding immediately what he meant.

“Right!” Butch dropped Buttercup, forgetting whatever fight the two had found themselves in.

“Got it!” Boomer jumped up from where he had been sitting on Bubbles, squashing her to the ground.

“What was that thing!” Brick barked at Blossom and she wiped the blood from her nose.

“I only know as much as you do, considering it literally just happened. Maybe it has to do with air—“

She cut off and looked at him, as he adjusted his emergency back up hat onto his head.

“What!” He hissed when he realized all three of the girls were giving him odd looks.

“Dude,” Buttercup asked from the ground, “do...do you just carry extra hats around?”

“Of course I do!” He spat, disgusted that they’d think so low of him not to, “Extra hat,” he pointed to his head, “emergency beanie,” he pulled one out of his pocket, “and extra hair ties,” him and his brother lifted up theirs wrists. “We live by the aesthetic, we die by the aesthetic, anymore questions?”

“Yeah!” Boomer huffed in his defense, “what’s it fucking matter to you anyway!”

“Don’t you three have bigger issues to worry about then our business?” Butch hissed, kicking at Buttercup.

Buttercup rolled away from the kick, dodging it with a laugh.

“What’s so funny!” Butch demanded and Buttercup shook her head, ignoring Butch and pointing up at her sister.

“Holy crap! He really is your counterpart, huh? You guys are perfect for each other!” She laughed wheezing. 

“Hey!!” Him and Blossom bristled together, “Shut up!”

————————————————————

When he learns that over excessive hat use can lead to hair breakage and premature balding his heart breaks, so he starts buckling them to his belt loops instead when he remembers to give his hair a break.

[mydemonsdrivealimo]

Hey there! In honor of Thanksgiving in the states, can you tell us three things your MC is grateful for this year? What about their LI?

And if you want to tell us three things your thankful for too, go for it!

ooh ty for this ask!! (this got really long whoops)

Jensen:

The opportunities he's had in his career. Jensen came from as close to nothing as you can get, and the fact that he's made it so far is something he's incredibly grateful for (even if he doubts it here and there). The support system he's gained from his career as well as the expansion of his knowledge and education are things he never fathomed having before. He was so focused on surviving for so long he didn't think he could ever have anything extra or more, and now that he does, he couldn't imagine living without it.

Bryce of course. Jensen has a running list of poor decisions, many of his ex-partners on it, but Bryce is genuinely so different to anyone he's ever been with. Sure, in the beginning Jensen didn't think it would be that way, but after Bryce's initial,, yk,, being Bryce, it was very clear how much he cares. He listens, and is genuinely interested and invested in Jensen and what he finds important. He's always there with support whenever Jensen needs it, but he's also there just to make him laugh, too. Jensen is so grateful that Bryce is a part of his life, and that Bryce reciprocates it just as much.

The friend group. He's thankful that he's found a solid group of people who care about him and share similar interests. They're in it forever, and whether it be a celebration or the opposite, they're going to be there for each other. They're fun and entertaining but they know when to take things seriously. They share the same sense of humor, make fun of each other in a loving way, and would defend each other at any opportunity. Not only is he thankful that they're all in his life, he's thankful he gets to be a part of theirs, too.

Bryce:

How well he's done for himself since moving away from his parents. He had to figure out how to live, support himself, put himself through med school, and manage a new career without any support or advice. But guess what? He did it. He may bullshit and be cocky about his self confidence, but he's genuinely proud of himself for how far he's come and knows it wasn't easy. He's thankful that he was able to thrive despite conditions that were most certainly against it.

His family. The one he's made for himself, with Keiki, Jensen, and the pets. They're people he chooses to have in his life and (most of the time) they make it so much better. They can all be a pain in his ass here and there, but he knows they'd never do anything to intentionally hurt him.

Also the friend group. Bryce has learned a lot since being around them, and he's grateful they've given him the opportunity to grow and prove himself as a supportive friend. Though he's not as close as the roomies, he's thankful they include him as closely as anyone else. They're genuinely good people, and they push him to be better, but they're always there for him to fall back on if he needs it. If he needs anything, he knows he could go to any one of them and they would help without question or hesitation.

Me :)

ngl this fandom. i was in a really bad slump for a few months, uninterested in a lot of things i used to love and isolating myself because of it. but then i started interacting here, and it took barely any time at all for yall to welcome me in. this space is genuinely so important for me, and i thank all of you for being so kind

my family. weve all started working on ourselves a little more and things are becoming much more enjoyable, so ive actually been looking forward to the holiday season this year :)

just some of the people ive met this year. theres a handful of them that have changed my perception drastically, and even if they dont know it, im very thankful that theyve become a part of my life and routine

[ashenberry]

PLEASE BE INSANE ABT YOUR OCS THOUGH legit honest to god the second you start talking about them i will go insane too <33333

ANYWAYS THE SILVER ASK REMINDED ME ABOUT THIS ASK sorry u sent this at me peak being sick anyways this was about aj and dee the gun siblings (I realized like. a few months ago that the lastname i gave them is a type of gun theyre also like. 1 of 2 familys to have a last name it came to me one afternoon anyways anyways) wahh so theres abouttaa 7 year difference between them theyve got an older sibling mostly bc aj has strong middle child vibes in my heart theyve got the same snarky sense of humor uh uh! aodkoidjawo im sorry im bad at describibng my characters

[shoezuki]

cracks knuckles. i promised to elaborate and i will.

the one common perspective that everyone seems to be able to agree on is that techno / sbi + schlatt + tubbo + ranboo are just genuinely funnier than the dteam, and honestly yes it's because if the popularity. if you go back and watch the dteams older (im talking before 2-3mil subs) videos they are funnier than their current ones and i think it's because they're trying to shift their humor to a broader audience?

the minecraft community has always been mainly queer/poc/ndv kids because it was exiled away from "acceptable society" for so long that only the people who had already been "exiled" continued to enjoy it. I, as an example, stopped playing when it became a cringy thing because I was so worried about being seen as weird. now that ive discovered, come to terms with, and enjoy my queerness, i realize that if i had known i was queer back when mc was exiled i wouldve continued to play because i alrwady would have known what it was like to be part of that seperate society. (Please keep reading i promise I have a point)

but then minecraft came back. minecraft became mainstream again, and it came back HARD. watching it go from something that you would be bullied immensely for to something that you would be bullied for not doing was an extreme experience. in all honesty im still angry about it, but that's another topic. when minecraft became mainstream it brought with it all of the people that hadn't been part of the exiled societies yk? including... the dream team.

dream blew up. we all know how much he blew up. i personally dont believe he cheated on the speedrun but to each their own (although after reading your stuff and becoming more critical of them im realizing i might need to reexamine that), and the speedrun controversy brought even more people to his base (cough drama loving straight white girls cough).

when they were brought into the fanbase that's when it started to go downhill. they shifted their humor to fit that, or maybe their humor was always that and they just got more confident in showing it after they had gotten a fan base to back them up. which is also why techno / sbi + schlatt + tubbo + ranboo (who ill refer to just as techno&co now because he's the main one but also that's long as hell lmao) are funnier than them!

for one, their fanbases are smaller. now 5 mil is by no means a small number, but compared to dream's 16 mil? yknow. especially with techno's wack upload schedule he's never had to worry about having a stan fan base because the only people who stay are people who genuinely enjoy his content the way it is.

two, techno&co are mostly ndv. techno has adhd, tubbo has dyslexia, wilbur had and maybe still has depression, ranboo has anxiety, tommy hasnt confirmed or denied his adhd but im betting he at least has borderline. i am in no ways saying that being part of one minority (in this case ndv) gives you free range over another (queer), but all minorities have this understanding about what it is to be part of an exiled community (if that makes sense).

philza and schlatt, not so sure if they're ndv, but they're also older and generally more mature and esp in philza's case, theyve had their chance to make their bad jokes and pull stupid shit and theyve grown out of it (if they ever had that phase at all). techno&co have that understanding and even if they dont know where the boundaries are they know that queer humor (and all humor! other than techno, sbi doesnt really make gay jokes) going to have boundaries, and they respect that.

three, techno is the funniest bitch because he has adhd. i dont take criticism on this point because im right.

i probably missed a lot, probably got some stuff wrong, but all in all i think i hit my mark. i can come off anon to chat anytime if youd vibe w that. no pressure to respond to this! have a good day, etc etc, it was fun getting to tear into the dteam in a safe space. respect for them and their fanbases, their humor is a little off but i still gotta respect how well theyve done. btw i woke up and rolled over and started typing I haven't proofed this at all so yeah. :) - andy

And your brain is fucking massive yo like u must got chronic back pain too from holdin up all these Thoughts in ur head

I really like. Minecraft fans is So varied cuz like u said it was so very 'cringe' before. I got into mc again n playin it w my siblings years before it Popped Off again entirely cuz i stopped Giving a Shit that it was 'weird' or any a that. N sbi have been goin strong through it So Long both when it was hotshit and when it was "cringe"

N definitely like minecraft ive always noticed has a Massive ndv community. I dont know entirely what it is like definitely part of the 'cringe' factor like u said and also cubes make our brains go brrrr? The aspect of self expression in it? I dont know but we Been Here

I do think dteam's content and shit like. It obviously moved in sync with perceptions of mc to garner a Big General audience. Dream blowing up entirely had to do w the Trends and how mc got popular. Therefore hes audience is Huge and Varied

In contrast w techno n like. He has blown up quite a bit too. But i feel its fair to say he Hasnt altered his content significantly. Or at least like. How its presented, what he does, etc. For fucks sake he doesnt have a stream schedule. And although his content is Still garnering a Large and really varied audience it feels more like. Isolated and homogeneous almost

Like. I can go into the technocord right now and say 'dont forget to take your meds' and at least 20 or so ppl would be all like Oh Fuck Whoops. Theres SO many of us adhd ppl in there. I always goof bout techno jus sayin pspspsps and the neurodivergents crawling up from the floorboards but honest to god. His content and jokes and i suppose Personality jus appeals to us So Much. Same goes for sbi pretty heavily honestly altho i feel its most evident in techno's most Dedicated fans

Also. Lbr. The people who stay through technos schedules and content Droughts are the ones who be hyperfixating Abskfvdkdsjsjsl

BUT going into sbi as a Group like. They are friends. And together they are fucking hilarious. N i feel it strongly like. The fact theyre all such Varied people of different ages and such helps w that shit. It Works So Well.

Long story short being neurodivergent makes you funny as hell letsgo

[msiopao]

Nobi with the Members

WORLDWIDE HANDSOME

‘eomma!!!’

one yell from her and jin’s running in with a spatula, ready to beat the kids

thinks a lot of her outfits are revealing but gave up after nobi told him to stop complaining to the stylists

cooking buddies

feeds into jin’s ego at being handsome

‘kim seokjin? no. art? yes.’

babies nobi TOO much

even though she’s literally 24, he still treats her like she’s 12

thinks she can do no wrong and sees her as an angel

but nobi is such a bad influence

‘my hair is bothering my eyes and it makes me want to just cut if off’

*nobi handing him scissors* ‘do it’

constantly telling him that his dancing is perfect bc jin is insecure about the lack of his ability :(

even though he’s a better dancer than most

nobi tries to get him riled up so he talks all weird

the one who is actually genuinely tickled with jin’s jokes

eatjin’s legendary moments always have jin and nobi in it

goes to his hotel room just because he always has food and jin doesn’t have it in him to refuse her

the one who nags nobi the most regarding her eating

just her mom periodt

TONGUE TECHNOLOGY

gets hyper when nobi messes around

incredibly and ridiculously protective of her

helps her go through rough times as her therapist

yoongi mumbles under his breath and nobi is usually the only one who hears and will laugh as he curses someone quietly

nobi’s sense of humor is the closest with his

nap times are their bonding times

also composing

army always amazed bc nobi is the only who gets yoongi on crack mode

nobi always pinches his cheeks and she shrieks when he does that cute awkward smile

nobi absolutely flipped out when yoongi got really sick

always seeks yoongi’s approval so he’s the first one to see her lyrics

doesnt beat around the bush w it

if its bad, needs improvement

if its good, its the BEST LYRICS HES EVER READ

nobi hides her feelings well and he’s the only one who can get her to open up

during bst era, she hit her lowest

yoongi got very concerned and when she did finally talk, his heart just broke in half

she hates the fact that she can’t be the daughter her parents wanted

she hates the fact that she’s weak and breaks down easily

she hates the fact that she’s seen as a whore because she’s surrounded by boys she calls her brothers 24/7

she hates the fact that everything about her is considered wrong

that talk got them really close and yoongi makes it mission everyday to see her genuine and pretty smile

he lives for her happiness

uwu

HOBI

‘WELCOME TO THE HOBI NOBI SHOW!’

puppies

nobi hugs him a lot

whenever he dances, nobi has this look in her eyes that looks like hobi is the stars and the universe

both of them are the ones who keep the group’s mood up and tries to prevent fights

even when they’re tired from practice, they still smile and yells ‘hwaiting!’

while hobi is just a moodmaker in general,

nobi does it bc she hates confrontation and gets uncomfortable so she just blurts it out

nobi’s also a dancer so her and hobi dance ALL THE TIME

vlives w them are always filled with laughter and teasing

‘everyone, nobi just fell after hitting that spin’

‘YAH! NO I DIDNT!’

hobi is known to be a choroegrapher and nobi puts her input here and there and boom!

tbh idk why they even have a professional choreographer in the first place

hobi is a trained singer so nobi asks him to sing for her constantly

hes happy to oblige

armys live for the moments of them in run bts or vlives bc they have this vibe or bond that is just something you wished you had

JOONIE-HYUNG!

‘NOBI WATCH OUT!’

they’re the philosophical duo

nobi loves poetry and literature in general bc she tends to think really deeply 

their bonding time is those deep talks

as their leader, nobi goes to him for confirmation or approval for a lot of things

she’s always having english lessons w him and he tries his best to teach her so she could speak to int-army

bts calls them the clumsiest bc of joon’s usual clumsiness but nobi is always looking out for him so she doesnt pay attention to her surroundings and runs into something too

she loves his studio and hangs out the most even though joon’s always telling her to stay away

props up her feet on that fortune dollar table of his

when he speaks english in interviews, she watches him with a smile on her face

her dad

pats her head when she walks over to him

her and jimin crashes his vlives all the time 

there’s nothing in the world that changes the way she sees joonie

to her, she’ll always be the joonie who welcomed her to their group even though she was a brat at first

thats another story for next time

now she respects him so much and he’s probably the one she looks up to the most

overall, she idolizes him and talks about him like he put the stars in the sky while joon just sits there all flustered

MOCHI

oof look at that beautiful manjfkalj;dlfsjkf

cannot sleep without her chimmy plush

when they first met, he was the first one she got really close to

his cute chubby cheeks were victims of her uwu moments

learns a lot fo ballet videos from youtube and they dance it in vlives all the time

remember when i said she had an eating disorder?

yea, it happened around the time he had his too

nobi was always trying to eat little ever since debut but she stopped eating for days at a time and with jimin doing it too, bts kinda derailed for a hot minute

a long emotional time of sufering until bang pd demanded they stop it immediately

after that, they had an emotional sit down where they just cried and spilled all their insecurities and they had each other’s backs

knowing she was already skinny, jimin disapproved but she also disapproved and again, more tears

nobi always hides snacks in her and kook’s room that kook doesn’t even know about and she always brings the box over to jimin’s room if hobi is out for schedules

when hobi went to america, nobi slept in jimin’s room

kook was real pissed off about it

eyesmiles for days

giggles 24/7

has the picture of one of jimin’s unreleased baby pictures as her home screen

dies a little inside when nobi reaches over to him with sweater paws bc OMG she’s so cute

uwu

jimin really coos and giggles at nobi bc of her small height and her uwu energy

sorry i used uwu a lot

TAETAE

the dumpling accident omg

jimin mentioned it in a vlive earlier and nobi also talked about it a day later in her own vlive

‘tae was very hungry at that time and just wanted to eat it immediately and when he got angry, he curled up to nobi and refused to acknowledge me’

again, nobi hates confrontation so fights between the members always brings her down and so she tries to comfort each member

she bought tae some dumplings after practice and tricked him into meeting jimin so they could meet up

tbh, tae would be a mess without nobi

she helps him clean up his room but gives up w the amount of clothes on the floor

‘honestly, you shouldve just stayed roommates w joonie-hyung. we cant trust you to room by yourself’

she goes to his room sometimes and just lays on his bed bc he has the softest bed in the whole dorm

tae is already known to be very regal and royalty like whenever he steps outside

combine that with graceful queen nobi?

oof armys fanfiction royalty aus pop up everywhere

nobi is still angry that tae isn’t a gucci model w her bc she feels out of place being the only member w a clothing sponsorship

but underneath that stiff and cold facade, they both are seen making faces and goofing off all the time

nobi can only stand being a queen for so long

in one concert, she danced w him in a duet w singularity and lets just say, armys died that night

always stands next to each other and if they cant, always seen giving each other longing stares and smiles

the 2nd most popular ship in the fandom and they know it too so they keep feeding armys for their compilation videos

MUSCLE PIG

the only member who’s younger than her

actually would it be considered if they’re only 10-months apart?

kook refuses to call her noona unless he wants something

initially didnt like her but there was a time she bought him banana milk and it was all good

our boy was crying bc he was hungry and tired and he was trying to control his weight and he just wanted some banana milk

they’re a superior ship

one of the most popular ship in the whole industry

actually the superior couple and kai and jennie can square up

there’s fan edits of them and they both purposely do stuff to help them make au videos in youtube

theyve seen it before so we arent safe bois

the 2nd pair of roommates in the bts dorm

nobi is usually the first one to sleep while kook is watching something in the living room

when he goes to his room, he takes a minute and stands at the doorway and just looks at nobi with love in his eyes

mhm

nobi loves warmth so she gets out of her own bed at like 3 in the morning and just goes into kook’s and cuddles to him

sometimes, they just lay in bed and nobi is holding his hand just inspecting his tattoos

‘should we get a matching tattoo?’

their closet is large and tbh, they share the same clothing anyways

more like nobi wears mostly kook’s stuff

like, really, nobi has pants and a few shirts and thats it

they share everything like family but kook refuses to share her w anyone else but him

[justalitlecreacher]

I’m here to prove that Andrew Garfield’s portrayal of Spider-man/peter parker in The Amazing Spider-Man is objectively the best love action adaptation of the character. In this essay I will....(yes this is really happening)

Edit: 10/20/20- i want to indulge myself in spiderman content but finding non mcu spiderman content is exhausting so imma update this instead

TL;DR

Andrew Garfield is my favorite of the 3 Spider-Man actors. TAS’s Peter is more fun and dynamic than the cookie cutter “shy introverted nerd that has a crush on a girl who’s way out of his league” Peter in Tobey Maguire’s movies. I enjoy Tom Holland’s portrayal of the character, but hate the way Disney has written the movies.  I enjoy the characters, plot, and humor of The Amazing Spider-Man far more than the other 2, and i deeply wish we had gotten the third movie with the canon BIder-Man of Andrew’s (and my) dreams.

[DISCLAIMER: I HAVE NOT SEEN THE AMAZING SPIDERMAN 2 OR ANY MCU SPIDERMAN MOVIES OUTSIDE OF CLIPS AND REVIEWS ITS ALSO BEEN A VERY HOT MINUTE SINCE IVE SEEN A TOBEY MAGUIRE MOVIE]

Characterization

  Most arguments against Andrew Garfield’s Spidey( AG’s from now on) begin and ends with “he was a good Spider-Man but a bad Peter Parker”. This references an outdated post comparing all three Spidey actors.(Id attach the image here but i dont want the post to be too long(thats a lie this is so long what am i doing with my life)) The post also claims that Tobey played a good Peter and a poor Spidey; and that Tom is good at both “roles”.(Honestly I think it seems silly that this seems obey the “third time’s the charm” rule but thats just me).  Most people using this seem to be Tobey stans who have forgotten or ignored the rest of the post funnily enough, but the ones that go further into the WHY AG is a poor Peter are also incorrect. This argument also ignores the idea that there can be more than one version of Peter Parker which is blatantly incorrect.  Just look at Into the Spiderverse or the PS4 game; these provide 4(5 if you count the pig) versions of Peter themselves, and that doesnt even include the comics. 

 Arguments that go further in depth claim that the AS Peter is too cool or well liked by his peer to be a “true” Peter Parker. The evidence for this seems to be that Peter has a skateboard.(which what? didnt realize that having a skateboard would instantly make you cool brb guys). Adding to that i dont really see where people get the idea that Peter is popular or well liked. While looking for complaints i found this qutoe from reddit(theyve since deleted it looks like but i’ll add a link in the notes) “He's angsty, pretty socially awkward, has an aptitude for science, and is kind of an outsider. He gets bullied by Flash and he gets his ass kicked after trying to stand up to Flash. He isn't a "cool" person in any way (until the ending, in which he's best buds with Flash, so I'll give you that). While Maguire is more accurate to the 60s comics where Peter in high school is just a fucking loser with basically no friends, in the ultimate comics, Peter is more of the kid who has a small amount of friends, but isn't popular.”. Honesty i fully agree with this because once again, other versions of a character are allowed to exist. You can dislike one version, but its silly to dislike something for not being exactly like another thing.

Ive also heard that Peter isnt “nerdy enough” in this movie which really doesnt make any sense considering the entire plot happens because Peter was looking into some of his parents’ research. If he wasn't interested in looking further into his father’s work what reason would he have to go to Oscorp where he’s bitten by the spider? Why would he have become Dr. Conner’s assistant? If he wasn’t intelligent how did he develop the web shooters?(something that Tobey!Peter doesn't have to do out of plot convenience might i add).  

 Another complaint i see is that the quips he uses in the movie(the first one specifically it seems) makes him seem like an asshole. Honestly thats a fair complaint, but i think its a good bit of characterization; espcially if he does get better about it in the second movie like the internet suggests.The Peter in this movie is a rightfully angsty teen; of course he acts a bit of an ass to criminals(also i feel like its important to mention that he’s like that to criminals? its not like hes being a dick for no reason).

  Compare this with the Tobey Maguire(TM) movies. Like i said i haven’t seen these in awhile but as far as i’m aware TM’s Peter doesn't really do anything particularly nerdy in the film? I may have forgotten something( ok in the scene before he gets bitten he knows a cool spider fact) but he doesn’t have to invent the web-shooters because they came with his powers and he’s only at Oscorp in the first place because it’s a school field trip that he appears to be taking photos for. This Peter does fit the definition of outcast(friendless and bullied for it), but honestly i just dont like him. He’s weird and something about the character makes me feel like i should be a little grossed out every time he looks at MJ at the beginning of the movie.  

   I honestly don’t have any complaints for Tom Holland’s(TH’s)Spidey. Tom is a great actor and from what ive seen i enjoy his portrayal of the character.( He made me cry when i character i actively dislike died).  

Story

  I cant really say much for TAS story. It’s interesting but nothing special really. However, there is one scene that i don’t think i’ve seen anything like since( the closest would probably be the train scene in the original trilogy). 

 The crane scene. Early in the film Peter saves a boy from a car that has fallen off of a bridge, and at the end of the movie this becomes relevant again when it is uncertain that Peter will be able to get to the lizard to stop him in time.(as Peter is already injured and pretty far from the lizard’s location). The boy’s father is then revealed to be a construction worker who recognizes that Spider-man is going to need help to get to the lizard; he remembers how Spider-Man saved his son and organizes the rest of the construction workers to build a path out of crane arms for SM to swing from. All of them are putting themselves in danger by not evacuating, but SM’s actions in the first act of the film motivate them to do what’s right. 

  I love this scene primarily because it highlights something that i think is a really important part of Spider-Man’s character; his connection to the people he saves. SM is often shown interacting with and chatting with the people he has saved after the fact. One comic shows Peter accidentally scaring some bullies and then taking the time to ride the bus to school with them to continue their conversation and educate the students on bullying.( There’s definitely more but this is off the top of my head).

  Another scene in TAS that i love is shortly before the crane scene when Peter is originally attempting to make his way across the city to stop the lizard, and he is shot down by the police. They manage to unmask him before Peter comes to his senses( he had just been shot and fallen pretty far out of the sky in his defense). From there Peter is able to deal with the police while keeping any of them from getting a good look at his face. The one cop he cant take out happens to be Gwen Stacey’s father who had previously had an argument with Peter about Spider-Man(Peter obviously on SM’s side and Mr. Stacey against SM). Peter turns and allows Captain(?) Stacey to see his face. I believe that this is an example of an unwilling identity reveal done right. i really enjoyed this moment because Peter had just shown that he likely could have gotten out of this encounter with his identity in tact as he had just taken down however many men. This implies that it was an active choice on Peter’s end to trust that Captain Stacey would ultimately do the right thing and allow Peter to go fight the Lizard, rather than a final desperate attempt to get away unscathed. Whether or not this interpretation of the scene is correct or not it still gives the character a bit more agency than some versions have done with their identity reveals.

  In Spider-Man 2 Peter starts to lose his powers because he’s having internal conflict about wether or not he should be Spider-Man. Honestly thats kinda neat and i might want to give that a rewatch. As for the one i have seen i don’t have any complaints. I do however prefer the way that Peter was bitten in TAS because it was a result of him poking around where he shouldn’t’ve been rather than him just happening to be standing in the right place for a spider to land on him. 

  Onto TH’s movies; the way Disney has treated Spidey in the MCU is why TH’s is my least favorite version of the character. I feel like too much of the story revolves around Iron Man; Iron Man made Peter’s suit and equipment, Iron Man introduces Peter to the MCU(via blackmail but thats another rant for another annoyingly long post), its Iron Man that “makes” Spidey in this universe rather than Spidey being self-made. In Homecoming(which remember i havent seen outside of clips so bear with me) most of the conflict is cause directly or indirectly by Tony’s refusal or inabilty to communicate with the teenager he’s meant to be mentoring

 For one the entire incident with the ferry could have very easily been avoided had Tony bothered to communicate with Peter enough to tell him that the situation was being taken care of. On top of that at the moive’s climax Peter is shown trying to get in contact with Happy(from what ive picked up isnt he a chauffeur? like idk his deal i just know he’s someone Peter got pawned off onto after Civil War). Peter even goes as far as to somehow hack into Happy’s phone(i think thats what happened it was a weird tech thing that shouldve been a red flag that the call was important though) but instead of listening; Peter is ignored. If this was a different kind of movie Peter literally could have died and itd be the fault of Happy and Tony like..... A large portion of conflict comes from characters being incompetent and not communicating and thats just poor storytelling.

Before this turns too much into an anti mcu rant id also like to say that the way they did Civil War was really dumb considering that Peter defects to Cap’s side in the comics, but whatever.

 Also i loathe the way they handled the identity reveal at the end of Far From Home. With MCU movies most people know to expect an end credits scene by now, but typically that scene is not important to understand what’s happening in the films; they just aren’t important. Putting an identity reveal here makes it seem significantly less important than it is. On top of that i dislike their use of J Jonah Jameson for this scene.

  JJJ is a character who has been repeatedly shown to have a genuinely good heart. All of his anger comes from a place of love for his city(he even says this hemself in the ps4 game when May writes in to tell him that he needs help). He hates Spider-Man because SM reminds him of the masked man who killed his wife; JJJ has never been able to get past that( and Peter’s antagonism of him definitely doesnt help) However, JJJ has been shown to care for people; he has a son who he often brags about, and one comic shows that JJJ is paying Peter for “amateur” quality photos because he knows that Peter is having a hard time and “just need some help”. JJJ has even learned Peter’s identity before and kept his secret for him(seriously though i cant remember the name of the comic but its defiantly worth the read), and in the original trilogy when Goblin threatens JJJ he claims that he doesn’t know who sends in the photos of Spidey because he does it via email( this is a lie). The MCU will have a very difficult time convincing me that JJJ would ever out a teenager’s identity and put him in danger like that. It goes too far against his character.(this could be hypocritical of me to say considering how i just insisted that multiple versions of a character can exist but whatever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) 

This is accidentally turning into an MCU rant but id also like to say that i hate the lack of a TH!Spidey origin movie because it gives you no motivaion for Peter becoming SM or explanation of his powers; most people will know these things but if youre unfamiliar with the character its bound to be confusing(and im a sucker for origin movies)

[jaeyleo]

That is!! So cool!!! So, Ethos is in the past and doing tests and stuff on the egos? Very Interesting. What are the other egos like? Or Ethos? I am very very interested for this idea!!

thank you so much!! i’m glad you do!!

lemme just note that @florenceisfalling was a big help in getting some lore and other things set up so big huge kudos to them thank u thank u !!

all six boys are as follows, note, i’m still developing their personalities so they may change later on! this is just so far:

jameson: he/him, straight and asexual. was taken from the 1920s into 2020 to test with the others. he has limited time powers, for example he can rewind one full day, or jump forward one full day. once he jumps forward though he is unable to go back. anyway! he’s pretty serious and just a little bit grumpy most of the time, he doesn’t like it here. jamie is very skilled with knives and guns and fists, and is fascinated by ethos even though at first, he hates their guts. jameson softens up over time, but for the most part hes pretty grumpy and just wants to read his books, and spends a lot of his days missing his own time. very protective of jackie.

chase: he/him, straight (?). the most easy going of the group. very soft spoken and extremely empathetic. he was the first to break through ETH- 05’s coding and get them to show some sort of emotion, and he was a BIG help in getting the others to actually like ethos. chase is always trying to make everyone laugh, keep their hopes up, but internally he is extremely afraid he won’t get to see his wife and child again. he has depression, but ethos makes sure he gets his prescribed medication to make his life at least a LITTLE easier on him. he and henrik are extremely close as they knew each other before they came to the clinic.

henrik: he/him, gay. henrik is ALWAYS trying to take care of the others along w chase, especially after appointments. he often forgets to take care of himself because of this. henrik has a lot of trouble sleeping, often has random panic attacks and has undiagnosed OCD. he is very kind and patient, but he’s always worrying about something. you can find him running around the clinic during the day checking the medication, checking on the egos, etc. if he doesn’t have something to focus on he will get extremely anxious so if he says he’s gonna take ur vitals for the third time today he’s gonna take ur vitals for the third time today.

jackie: he/they, gay. youngest of the group at 19, hes very bubbly and warm and pretty chill! he’s laid back most of the time, but it’s very easy to make him laugh as he kinda has that gen z humor where if u show tbem a picture of a can of beans that’s over saturated and says “B E aNS 👁👁” theyre gonna lose it. same w chase. anyway he has a few powers, he can do a little telekinesis, can (weakly) control water and metal, and is oddly ODDLY lucky. like theyve always got a four leaf clover on them or somethin. hes pretty brave, and is learning how to fight properly from jameson! catch them sparring while henrik goes !!!!!!!!!! when jamie knicks jackie’s cheek with a knife.

marvin: he/him, pansexual. FTM transgender! marvin is kinda the leader of their group, well, except for ethos. he is VERY clever, very quick on his feet, and holds far too many secrets. definitely very mysterious. marvin is very confident and has a soft voice, strong, and enjoys singing little songs ! he has powerful POWERFUL magic, including hypnosis, various spells, he can make plants grow/heal/die, bend light, water, and shadows, and many other things. he’s been studying for a very long time. he also is able to talk to and sense ghosts and other supernatural things ! marvin is by far the most stoic of the group, and although he may seem like a tough guy, he deep down loves the group sssoooo much, and would put his life on the line for all of them. both he, jameson, and jackie all have a second chip inside their skin which prevents them from using their magic unless permitted. if they try to use more than allowed, it will give them an electric shock until they stop. ethos has lowered their restrictions on magic once they complained of it building up, but they still are not really allowed to do much with their magic anymore :/

ethos: he/they/she/it, ethos wasn’t programmed to be a certain gender. and aro/ace, as most robots are in this future as they weren’t made for romantic love! hes kind of a prototype? a new kind of android the future hasn’t tested much on bc they were very eager for the creation of the perfect being. ethos starts out as very quiet and cold, he doesn’t know much about the egos’ personalities so he can’t do much w them. this changes as time goes on. because he wasn’t tested much, he can feel emotions if taught them, this mostly includes observing humans. since his creation hes been very lonely, and taught he is lesser than humans so a lot of times he’ll comfort himself by saying poetry or going through files or something. (thanks flora for giving the idea of ethos just babbling to himself at night when he feels his most sad or lonely!) ethos doesn’t smile or laugh, and when he does it’s either him mimicking one of the boys to make them comfortable or it’s genuine and he smiles for a second and then it goes back to normal. it’s a little odd to look at. anyway he doesn’t enjoy giving appointments, in fact he’ll go against coding once in a while and fake the data so the boys don’t have to suffer. this is bad news for ethos! which i will explain more on later :3 overall hes very sweet and comforting and just wants people to be safe. he loves taking care of people, especially when they’re sick so if one of the boys is sick it’s usually both ethos and henrik fussing over them in their own ways.

sorry this is so long!! also ethos’s is rushed cos i gtg to work but i’ll explain more on this if y’all would like, thank u guys for the interest!

[disabled-queen-hc-blog]

one of queen trying increasingly bad pickup lines on another member (preferably joger) to make them crack a smile after someone has upset them/ theyve had a bad day

Roger sighed as he rubbed his face a little too hard, trying to steady his racing heart. He wanted to be a rock star so badly, ever since he was little but this was too much. He hadn’t been able to eat since yesterday. He can’t afford new drum sticks. The gig they had scheduled last week cancelled their act out of the blue. This was all going to shit.

“Fucking hell,” he mumbled to himself, hunching over in his chair. His stomach rumbled.

“Hey Roger?” a quiet voice said, cutting into his wallowing. Roger looked up to see John, the relatively new bassist crouched before him.

“Hmm?” he hummed, wanting to go back to his self deprecating thoughts.

John smiled before saying, “I’m lost. Can you give me directions to your heart?”

Roger spluttered, going red. “W-What?”

John flashed a devious smirk and shrugged. “It usually makes people laugh,” he said before standing up and walking away.

With the panic fading from him, Roger indeed laughed. John had a really weird sense of humor and all of them were still getting used to it. Really weird. But Roger couldn’t stop laughing.

♚

Roger took off his sunglasses, setting them on the table besides the mountain of papers he was attempting to make into a song. He had this idea in his head, this feeling that tugged at his heart strings, but it was seeming impossible to actually get it down on paper. With every lyric and note he wrote, it lost that grandiosity he had in his head.

He groaned, scratching out another line, nearly tearing the paper as he did so. Not like it mattered! There was only garbage on it. No need to preserve rubbish.

He ran his fingers through his hair as the door opened, John coming in with two cups of tea in hand and his always genuine smile.

“You’ve been pretty quiet. Thought I’d fetch you some tea. Could only find early grey. That alright with you?” he said, placing the tea in front of Roger. Roger nodded, not caring for whatever it was. He could take just about anything right now to see if that loosened up the gunk in his brain. 

John sat opposite of him, blowing on the piping cup, glancing at Roger who was ready to pull his hair out.

“Uh, Rog?” he asked, a shyness to his tone.

“Yeah?”

“Well..Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?“

Rogert snorted, slamming his hand down onto the table. “Goddamit, Deacy! I thought you were going to give me advice! Get out of here!” Roger yelled while chuckling, pointing to the door.

John snickered as he got up, waving an apologetic hand.

“But, I never got to ask you how your trip down from heaven was!”

John ran out the door before Roger could fling his sunglasses at him.

♚

Roger was sitting in his stool, thinking about everything besides how bloody long Brian’s guitar solo was. Maybe if he squinted hard enough, he could count how many people in the crowd were wearing yellow.

One..two..

“Hey!”

Roger came back from his day dreams, shooting a grin to John who had joined him on the drum riser, probably also bored out of his mind after what was Brian’s 5th solo.

“You know what?” John practically had to scream over the crowd and amps.

“What?” Roger yelled back, wiping some sweat from his forehead.

“You don’t need keys to drive me crazy.”

Roger threw his head back, letting out a gigantic laugh that nobody but John could hear. John just smiled, his eye crinkles showing as he hopped down the steps and kept on dancing, like nothing had happened.

Roger was so winded, he almost missed his cue to start playing again. Cheeky thing that John was. Always making him laugh right when he needed one. Good guy...Good guy...

♚

“Tell me why you needed me specifically to go on this road trip with you?” John asked as he cranked Roger’s car window down, sighing contentedly when the cool air hit his face.

Roger tried to hide his smile as he drove, stealing quick looks at a blissed out John in the passenger seat. John could never say no to a nice long car ride, even if he pretended to be all chuffed about it. He was as crazy for cars as Roger was.

“Oh! Simple really. I wanted to ask you something. Was your mother a thief?” Roger said, face as serious and stoic as his voice.

John’s face scrunched up at the question, shaking his head incredulously. “What? You know my mum, mate. What kind of question is that?”

“Oh. I was just asking ‘Cus someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes,” Roger said, his grin too wide to contain.

John went pink, fumbling with the bottom of his shirt. “O-Oh..!” was all he could manage to say.

Roger giggled before continuing. “Is it hot in here or is it just you?”

“It’s just you...”

“Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?”

“It’s noon...”

 Roger was laughing all the while, but his chuckling falter, his grip on the steering wheel growing tight.

“Is it just me or have you been flirting with me all these years?” he asked, his stomach suddenly beginning to flip.

John, for once, didn’t have an immediate answer. His mouth hung open, face flushing deeply.

The two were quiet for a minute, not uncomfortable but certainly not comforting either. Maybe Roger had read too much into the gag. Maybe he was better off driving the car off the side of a-

John cleared his throat, looking at Roger as he spoke.

“There's side view, rear view and you know what else?" he asked, a hint of a tremble in his voice.

“What else?” Roger asked, eager to see where this was going.

“I loview.”

Roger’s face got extremely warm, having to focus very hard on driving in that moment since his brain had set fireworks off. Oh thank god.

“D-Do you?” he found himself asking, uncharacteristically blunt and shaky, not his usual suave self.

John stayed silent, but had his answer ready at hand. A deliriously soft kiss to Roger’s cheek.

Roger had planned to take John to the beach for a beautiful first date, but at this rate he would crash the car from the heart palpitations and the occasional brain going blank he was experiencing. 

He pulled over, almost breathless as he said, “You want to go to a diner? Just off this highway?”

John nodded in the affirmative.

“Also,” Roger said before pressing his lips to John’s, John’s cheeks cupped in his calloused hands. John leaned into the kiss, eyes fluttering shut.

This was not in the plans at all, but goddamn.

Roger pulled away, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Your lips don’t look so lonely anymore.”

John snorted, slapping Roger’s knee.

This wasn’t in the plans, but by god was it a good start.

[i-am-the-entertainer]

RevieWBY: Volume 6

This has been stated so many times, but Volume 5 was bad. Okay, it wasn’t terrible, like I don’t feel offended by it being bad (unlike certain folks), but looking back on it I don’t have anything to say to really defend it as something Rooster Teeth should have talked up as much as they did at the time. It had some good things going for it, but the amount of problems it had in terms of animation and writing really put a sour taste in everyone’s mouth. So for Volume 6 to deal with all that fallout, it was going to have to do a lot. And to their credit, CRWBY accepted the criticism in stride, and actively worked to make Volume 6 something that people who despised Volume 5 might enjoy.

Still, one had to go into this season with the understanding that some people were never going to be completely satisfied with whatever CRWBY did. Because at the end of the day, the RWBY that Rooster Teeth currently makes is not Monty Oum’s show anymore. No, this isn’t saying CRWBY is in any way disrespecting his legacy, it’s just Monty Oum had a certain method to running the show that only he could really get away with: epic fight scenes, suddenly throwing giant curveballs into the series’ mythology, taking vital time away from storytelling so the fights looked cool. I mean, there are people who criticize the show for doing that now when they didn’t give two shits when Monty did it, because Monty did it in a manner that somehow worked. I don’t know how he did it, but he did, and, well, he’s not here to do it, and there’s no way even a huge animation team can collectively do things like him. And they shouldn’t: if they can use a better industry standard animation engine than Poser, than the fact that Monty Oum didn’t like animating with Maya shouldn’t stop them.

Blah blah blah...this is all about FNDM reception. What did I think of Volume 6?

Well...

Focus

In my mid-volume review I cited this as Volume 6′s strongest aspect, and as far as I can tell this remains the case. By focusing our hero storyline on one group and for the most part the villain storylines on only a few characters who were paired off, Volume 6 effectively told a story that didn’t force the viewers to juggle multiple things and find some semblance of a continuing story. Everything happened linearly and the whole thing made for a more enjoyable watch overall.

Tone

Building off of that renewed focus, this volume felt like it had more of a consistent tone that lasted from beginning to end. RWBY markets itself as an anime show and uses a lot of that anime-style of humor (slapstick and comedically exaggerated emotions), but honestly it’s always played fast and loose with using that humor in a way that doesn’t feel out of place. In this volume it was more consistently used, and that’s largely thanks to the nailed down focus that allowed character interactions to utilize the humor in a natural way. Ruby and Maria Calavera were especially good sources for humor.

Now, things did get a little more screwball when Cordovin came into the mix, but it was interesting seeing CRWBY take that humor to a logical extreme for the first time in a while (not since the Beacon years). It interrupted the tone for a bit, but not in a manner that overall changed the genre this show is going for.

Animation

Beautiful. The improved production pipeline that we’ve heard about really came through. These episodes were the best they’ve ever looked, minus a few errors here and there, showing just how amazing RWBY can look when you give the animators time to add their own touches. There was some really great fight animation to boot: none of the fights this volume felt awkward, and you could tell the animators had a lot of fun.

Worldbuilding/Storytelling

It feels weird saying that Volume 6 did a better job with worldbuilding than Volume 4, which took place on four different continents and traveled across one, and Volume 5, which took place on two different continents and featured the second major skirmish between the villains and the heroes. I think this has to do with just how well it was integrated into the story: insight into the world came at points where the story needed it and when the viewers wanted it. Nothing ever felt like a massive info dump better suited World of Remnant; where there was just too much information delivered that wasn’t relevant to what was happening in the show. Volumes 4 and 5 had this same problem with establishing the world, often telling us too much in a way that just didn’t feel natural to the story. With Volume 6, almost every chapter up until the final Argus arc included some form of that insight:

Chapter 1 showed us how ordinary civilians deal with traveling through Grimm territory––the steps they take to protect themselves

Chapter 2 showed us some aspects of the Mistral criminal underground, not telling us too much about it but suggesting it was much larger than what Cinder encountered.

Chapter 3 showed us...so many things.

Chapter 4 offered a sense of the stakes RWBY faced in relation to all of Remnant.

Chapter 5 and 6 gave us a glimpse at another form of non-city life in Remnant.

Chapter 7 introduced us to Argus, my favorite of all the Remnant cities we’ve seen; plus a glimpse into the life of the silver-eyed warriors; and a more representative depiction of what domestic life is like in Remnant

Chapter 8 told us what Atlas personnel who aren’t Ironwood or Winter are like, plus the long-awaited insight into how the silver eyes work.

Chapter 9 shows something of the effect the Battle of Beacon, and by extension Pyrrha’s death, had outside of our core group.

Things kind of teeter off with the finale arc, but that’s because worldbuilding became a little less important to what was going on. This is kind of a stretch, but the mech fight and the arrival of the Grimm in Argus give us an idea of how large non-capital cities defend themselves without just spelling everything out.

All in all, this volume delivered on some impressive worldbuilding, probably the best the series has had in a while. It wasn’t massive info dumps unless it needed to be (e.g. Chapter 3), and it offered just enough for other important things like the storytelling and the action to still be in the forefront.

Characters

Volume 5, despite the fact it involved the major reunion of Team RWBY after two volumes, felt like it was simply putting the main characters through situations without those situations really doing anything to develop them or define them as anything beyond what we already knew. Some characters fared better on the development front, namely Yang, but others, especially Ruby, just seemed to be along for the ride without us getting any insight into them. This is where the writing issue that came from separating everyone starting with Volume 4 really came to a head: too many different characters with their own story to cover, and sometimes those stories just didn’t do much for the character beyond existing as a situation they were in.

Volume 6 feels like the refutal of that, and that mostly has to do with the fact that we’re not juggling so many storylines anymore. When a major event happens to the heroes, everyone gets affected at the same time. The train crashes? DEVELOPMENT! Jinn’s story? DEVELOPMENT AND INSIGHT! Snowstorm? INSIGHT! The Apathy? DEVELOPMENT! Telling team JNR about Jinn’s story? DEVELOPMENT! Adam ambushes Blake and Yang for the first time since Volume 3? DEVELOPMENT! WITH A HEALTHY DOSAGE OF ANGST!

Surprisingly, the same thing is happening to two of our favorite villains, Mercury and Emerald: even though they only really appeared in three chapters this Volume, we actually got a surprising chance to see how their defeat at the Battle of Haven affected them, and their increasingly strong misgivings about working for Salem. We get more of an idea of them as people rather than Cinder’s blind followers, understanding why they stuck with such an evil person for so long. It’s the most we’ve learned about them since Volume 3, and we didn’t even need lengthy flashbacks.

Even Adam got some more insight. RWBY has been following the path that Adam was an abusive ex-boyfriend for quite a while now, but there was always this underlying thought that he got into the White Fang business for a seemingly noble cause. The problem was the show hadn’t depicted how he got from Point A to Point B. The Adam Character Short offered us some of that much needed insight, putting some of his actions up to this point in a new context, even if it was set-up for clearing up some things so they could get rid of him.

Of course, there are still exceptions to characters getting character development, and honestly they’re kind of glaring ones. Oscar’s development arc, where he came to accept he was his own person, completely happened offscreen (for reasons that I’ve brought up before and will reiterate in the final section), robbing us of really witnessing his growth as a person. I enjoyed some of the stuff Cinder did this volume, especially her escape from the vault and her fight with Neo. But honestly she continues to be a pretty bland villain with little hints at her motivations for being such a terrible person: the Battle of Haven was such an utter defeat for her there needed to be some form of consequence that would’ve affected her character while also telling us more about her. Maybe it would’ve been her strategizing her revenge, which would’ve gotten more insight into how she thinks as a master planner. Instead, we get her leaving the vault, more or less going back to what she used to do but in a more low-key setting, fighting with Neo, plotting with Neo, and leaving with Neo. It felt more like “Hey, she’s alive, and here’s what she’s doing,” which while I appreciate it feels kind of a waste of time if you’re not doing anything with her beyond that. Honestly, a post-credits reveal that she was alive and then a pre-Volume 7 character short detailing how she made it to Atlas that covered her and Neo’s entire storyline this volume would’ve been more helpful.

Before I go on to my most major critique of this volume, I need to address the two Goliaths in the room.

Adam

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: they needed to get rid of Adam. The way things have been going, there was only so much more you could do with his character before he became a nuisance that was overstaying his welcome. I understand people wanted some deeper insight into him, but the fact was he was never introduced to be a major villain to anyone beyond Blake and later Yang. They could’ve had him have a thing against Weiss, but they didn’t, they focused the time that would’ve made him a major villain for everyone else on making people like Roman and Cinder and Salem the big villains. They decided on the path of abusive ex-boyfriend a very long time ago, and if you hadn’t figured that out after the Adam Character Short I honestly think you were being willfully ignorant to what’s been building up.

The best I can say is that Adam and his history is a missed opportunity for some pretty interesting storytelling and worldbuilding, but the fact remains: it is not his story that they want to tell, it is not his show. It may make something interesting to think about, but Adam’s story is supplementary, and works better in supplementary material, a la character shorts and maybe mangas.

Jaune

Y’all need to quit it with the “Hrrr drr Jaune took up time again moan moan Miles Luna is self indulgent” talk, he barely did anything this volume beyond Chapter 9 and having a sister that the whole fandom loved.

Pacing

This...this is where Volume 6 ran into trouble.

Overall, from the season premiere to the finale arc, this was probably the best-paced season of RWBY we’ve ever had. Major story events happened right when we needed them, and for the most part they didn’t drag out story arcs for any longer than they needed to be.

Well...until they reached Argus, that is.

At face value, a lot happened in the final couple of chapters. Chapter 8 gave us Maria explaining the silver eyes, Chapter 9 had the scene with Pyrrha’s statue and the mysterious Red-Haired Woman (I’ll headcanon whatever I want about who she is, Jen Brown) Chapter 10 started the Cordovin fight, Chapter 11 reinforced Blake and Yang’s partnership, Chapter 12 killed Adam, and Chapter 13 had Ruby finally use her silver eye powers to defeat a Grimm and they made it to Atlas. Yeah, it was a pretty eventful set of episodes.

So then why did it feel like it dragged? Here are a couple reasons that I’ve identified.

1. The Cordovin Battle sidelined story arcs for too long

I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it again: the finale arc should not have been split up like that over so many episodes. It afforded us some pretty well-animated fights, some of the best the series has ever had, but the volume hadn’t been relying on that action to keep up the forward momentum, but on actually telling the stories of these characters. I get the need for CRWBY to prove that they can do well-animated fights, but as I’ve come to accept action should never take precedence over storytelling (I know, that’s hard to swallow when parts of the fndm spends hours complaining about how Monty’s not animating the fights anymore). And it’s clear to me in this final arc put emphasis on the action over the momentum of the story, bringing the actually pretty good storytelling the volume had had up to that point to a grinding halt.

Now, historically RWBY fights have delayed telling stories, but it’s never been for too long, at most maybe two chapters? But if you spend three chapters on a single fight, thereby devoting three weeks of your viewers’ time to high-octane action, people are gonna notice that the story is basically going nowhere.

What could’ve made this less of a problem? Well, perhaps establishing Cordovin earlier and making her less of a buffoon would’ve eased my hatred of this arc. Volume 6 lacks a clear antagonist for the story, but the way Cordovin was treated as a big deal in this final battle made it seem like she was taking up that role, except we didn’t even see her until the final half of the volume, and in her debut we couldn’t take her seriously as a villain, much less an antagonist, because of the pure comedy they used in her intro. There needed to be something about her at least a few episodes early––take this with a grain of salt because I think following JNR in Argus would’ve killed the balanced pacing of the first half of the volume (and just made the Jaune haters apoplectic), but maybe a few quick scenes of JNR arriving in Argus and getting rejected by her would’ve been helpful. Or honestly easing off on the comedy of her intro. Such a one-note character who we are primed to not take seriously isn’t interesting as a major force, so identifying her as a more threatening roadblock for the heroes would’ve made the stakes of the final fight a little more...present.

2. Important storylines got trimmed for time’s sake and weren’t addressed properly.

@hypeathon (whose excellent production analyses for this Volume are well worth a read) identified a tweet Miles made back in October, prior to the premiere and most likely when they were finishing storyboards, about “killing your darlings.” For those unaware and who may have severely misinterpreted that comment, “killing your darlings” is when writers have to sacrifice something they love or want to do so that the story works better. The timeliness of this tweet (after they would’ve finished the script but before they’d wrapped on storyboards and voice acting for the final episodes) suggests the writers’ room had to cut a lot of material from Volume 6 (what Miles called a massacre of darlings), most likely due to production limits or not having enough time to cover them.

Think about it: the story from Chapters 1-7 was really good: everything was properly spaced out, the scripts felt polished, there was a balance of action and comedy and legit storytelling, the good pacing lasted longer than it ever has within a single volume.

Then we hit Chapter 8 and suddenly it all changes: storylines don’t get the proper time devoted to them, arcs come to a screeching halt due to the big fight. Unlike previous volumes, where the imbalance was pretty much the entire volume, there’s actually a clear point right in the middle of this volume where things suddenly took a turn for the worse. And the fact is, some of the problems with the story in the final arc suddenly make more sense if you accept that time that would’ve been devoted to it got sidelined in this “purge”: Qrow’s alcoholism suddenly getting brushed aside after Chapter 9 hopefully to be addressed next volume, Oscar disappearing and all his development happening offscreen, Adam’s completely unsubtle return after only a vague hint in Chapter 1 that would’ve been stronger if he’d kept popping up in Argus. I’d even go so far to say the odd pacing of the final few chapters could easily have been the result of the writing team not being able to devote a single chapter to such a grand fight, so they needed to stretch it out so CRWBY could actually animate it within reasonable deadlines, which meant sacrificing time for those arcs that so desperately needed development.

So what overall is gonna fix RWBY’s pacing in the future? Well, I think at the moment the show is too ambitious. If it wants to keep to a reasonable production schedule, they need to control the scale of their finales so that it can be completed without needing to sacrifice other storylines. If it wants to hold onto that ambition and make the finales as grand as they want it to be to do their boy Monty proud, then they absolutely need to delay the actual release of the volume so they can put in the proper amount of time to both the story and animation. And I don’t think anyone would mind waiting a little longer for Volume 7 if it meant this show got the care and attention it needs to tell the story it clearly wants to tell.

Conclusions

Evaluating Volume 6 is impossible without evaluating what came before it. RWBY was never a perfect show, but when you lose someone who was responsible for the show’s popularity in the first place and have to change how it’s made to make up for his absence, there’s going to be backlash. Backlash from the fans, and, uh, backlash from inside the company. The fact is, people are never going to be satisfied with the RWBY that Rooster Teeth makes today, and Rooster Teeth is never going to push out a RWBY that will make everyone happy. All they can really do is keep moving forward.

And move forward they did. Despite my problems with the finale, Volume 6 was good. I’ve always been sort of ambivalent about the show (I was drawn to it by my brother shortly before Monty’s death and have been watching it out of respect for him and the company as creative artists), and even if I thought some of RWBY’s critics were being too harsh (or seriously needed to find something better to do), I didn’t find Volumes 4 and 5 enjoyable enough that I felt like defending them. But guys, Volume 6 did something amazing: it made RWBY fun to watch again. Focused, consistent, and compelling storytelling plus gradually eased-in worldbuilding made for a story that I could follow along without having to juggle so many different plots. Improvements in the overall animation made things nice to look at and when fights happened they were always entertaining, never making me cringe or grimace, always making me think “Hell yeah, beat the shit out of them!” Just like I felt back in the old days of the show.

I feel as though what’s holding RWBY back at this point, however, is adhering to the production schedule that its old vision called for in making its current vision. And it honestly cannot keep doing that. RWBY is a show trying to reach grand heights, and its rushed production timelines and lost story arcs are keeping it tethered to the ground. Yet I can’t help but say: Volume 6 is RWBY at its finest so far. It can’t fix the problems that previous volumes have had, but it builds on the void those problems left to build a story that makes this show feel like something worth following once more.

So, I can safely say I’ll be following along when RWBY returns for Volume 7...hopefully later rather than sooner (again, it needs a better production schedule).

[perhaps-mr-collins-has-a-cousin]

👪 Random Question Time! 👪 What are your parents like?

Oh goodness, well prepare yourself for a rather long answer this time. It’s long, but it still doesn’t feel complete, you know? How do you describe a whole, entire person? This answer is also somewhat rambly and disorganized because I didn’t feel like going through and editing it heavily enough for it to make sense and flow nicely, but…here it is anyway! 

To start with, my parents are both shy in a lot of situations, which explains where I got it from, but it doesn’t explain how the heck they ended up together, which has always confused me, even though they’ve told me the story several times. They’re just such different people in terms of temperament and interests, but somehow it worked! 

So my dad is super dependable. If we’re talking Myers-Briggs (which he thinks is utter baloney), I’ve always thought of him as an ISTJ? Super practical, but sometimes a weird sort of practicality that I, in my weird INFJ-ness would call oversimplification? He thinks I focus too much on feelings or things that are subjective, rather than on The Facts, and then I counter that just because feelings are subjective and immeasurable doesn’t mean they aren’t real or important, and round and round we go. I’m making it sound like we argue a lot, and really we argue pretty rarely, but we do like to Discuss. He’s actually pretty chill about letting me say what I want around him and letting me have my opinion even if he disagrees. It’s nice. And by the way, I don’t want to make it sound like he doesn’t care about people’s feelings either, because he really does. My mom has had some problems over the years, both physical and emotional, and I really think he’s been the most patient, compassionate, thorough caretaker anyone could ask for.

He’s got a weird sense of humor, but what dad doesn��t? His favorite joke is one that he made up himself, and it goes like this: 

How do you call a flower? 

With your tulips! 

(He told it at church once; it got a mixed reception.)

He’s pretty into physical fitness-y stuff, like before he retired he taught weight training and other physical education courses at our local community college. He still loves to ride his bike, I think that’s his favorite thing in the world to do. Reptiles and amphibians are another of his passions; we used to have at different times lizards and snakes and chameleons (the snakes were my favorite). Animals love him.

I get along best with my dad, but I’m probably most like my mom, at least on the surface. Our shyness manifests itself in a similar way: we’re both very soft-spoken, timid, usually only speak when spoken to, tend to like to avoid socializing altogether, etc. One of her favorite things to do is read, usually Christian fiction authors. She doesn’t really believe in herself, but I think she’s strong just to have dealt with all the difficulty she’s had in her life. She has such a soft heart and loves small children and animals, cats in particular. I’ve noticed she’s really good at reading people’s emotions. If I’m upset but try to hide it, she usually knows anyway. Is that an ISFJ thing? I don’t know, but I just feel like she’s an ISFJ. I can think of a couple times she saw me crying and started crying too because she felt my pain so strongly.

She doesn’t do as many creative things now, but I know she has that creative spark. She’s written a few short stories (there was one based on Cinderella that I loved) and done some cool cross-stitches (she taught me how to cross-stitch too). My dad is like that too, only with him it was poetry. Way back in his college days he was rejected by a girl and to vent his feelings he typed a short poem out on a napkin about how she’d looked at him with cow eyes and how was he to know she wasn’t interested if she gave him the freakin’ cow eyes, and he kept it in a box of mementoes and it’s probably the funniest thing I’ve ever read and I still make fun of him for it.

Anyway, sorry, back to my mom, who is actually quite funny too. She’s funny because you don’t expect her to be funny, I guess, and then she’ll just say something that makes you laugh, and I feel like I’m doing a really bad job describing it, but there you have it. Also she can make the most awesome chili.

Well, that gives you somewhat of a very rough idea of my parents’ personalities! They’re truly lovely people, and my closest friends :)