#theyre better for picking stuff up off the floor or telling you to check your blood sugar

[briarpatch-kids]

People are so weird about service dogs.

I get abled people tell me all the how great it would be for me to get a service dog. And I have to explain that a service dog can do barely a fraction of what I need help with and isn’t suitable for my disability.

But having a human carer isn’t as exciting as having a pet I can take everywhere which is all they think a service dog is rather than a disability aid that is essential for some disabled people and not suitable for others (like any other disability aid)

People who have service dogs have my full respect given the amount of BS they have to deal with.

Also like... how the hell are you going to care for a service dog? Thats one of my main reasons for not utilizing one, it's both medical equipment and also a living being that needs a lot of care and enrichment and the people who say "just" get a service dog either don't know how much work a dog is, or aren't giving it enough care. Any time I've talked to handler teams about it, that's their number one tip is to make sure you can actually care for a dog before you even start the process.

People forget they still need a lot of care, training, and maintenance and that only people in the very narrow range of of "highly skilled trainer" "still seriously disabled" and "physically capapable of caring for a dog" and that's why they're usually for things like minor mobility, psychiatric care, or conditions like seizures, cardiac care, and diabetes rather than like... high level paralysis or dystrophy or motor neuron disease.

[kozumebunny]

Dabi x reader (with minor x bakugou)

Prompt: During the USJ incident the villains kidnapped you. UA has been on high alert after that incident, metal detectors at gates, students having to check in during breaks on campus, and more. You have been at the villain bar ever since, quirkless thanks to All For One, and with no memory of UA or your life before it. When Dabi started hanging around the bar, he became attached to you, playfully teasing you for being forgetful. Things fall apart when Bakugou is captured during the summer camp training and he gets to see you, his stolen s/o again.

-When you woke up in a wood panel room with no memory you panic and look for a way out

-The door was unlocked so you opened it, found an empty hallway with the staircase at the end, so you go down it

-Its only kurogiri there at the bar, you look towards the door and bolt for it

-Kurogiri terrified you at first

-Kurogiri just teleports you upstairs

-It repeats for about three more times before you come down and hug the wall asking who he is

-“Kurogiri.” he makes a glass of apple juice and puts it on the bar counter. You walk over and take it

-“Are you hungry?” “yeah”

-He starts asking about you, gauging to see what you remember

-He makes you food and keeps talking to you

-He tells you you can’t go outside yet

-You ask him if he knows why you have amnesia and he says you had a mental break of sorts

-Your family left you in their care with no phone number

-Shigaraki comes in, he’s very demanding and childish

-You all get to know each other, you play minecraft with shigaraki, specifically those hunger games ones

-He gets better, calms down and learns how to be more strategic

-You never meet all for one, and shigaraki and kurogiri are careful never to mention him around you

-Enter: dabi

-Shigaraki HATES him lmao. He hates how Cool and Chill he is

-So he saddles dabi with babysitting you, and he lets dabi take you outside

-Dabi keeps a hand on your wrist the whole time, he never lets you out of his sight and he doesn’t let you let go

-You two had never talked outside of introducing yourselves

-You happily thread your hand through his and tug him through the shopping district

-You’re constantly talking to him and wanting to explore so he goes along with it, sticking to the busier parts of the shopping districts to help blend in

-He has on glasses, a beanie, and a face mask so no one can see him

-There are cameras that identify you in the district so UA is alerted. The heroes immediately head out to get you back, the local police are alerted

-Dabi notices that there are more police around, he doesn’t even know what you’re doing at the villain hideout all the time. All he knows is you have amnesia and that you’re quirkless. He immediately withdraws his hand from yours and slings it across your shoulders. He leads you into a shop, “follow my lead, doll.”

-He picks out a dark pair of sunglasses for you, sloppily restyling your hair and picking out a big jacket and a new outfit for you

-He rips the tags off them and says to change and wait outside the dressing rooms. He comes back to get you, giving you a face mask too

-There are police and heroes there in the whole area. Dabi tightens his arm around your shoulder and walks faster. He’s calling kurogiri trying to coordinate a way out.

-The police and heroes are going through the crowd picking certain people removing glasses and masks. 

-The whole area is closed off, there is no way to a private spot for kurogiri to open a portal

-Dabi calls someone else

-And then someone behind you says excuse me

-Dabi’s fingers loosen off your shoulder and his palm starts to hover so he can move his hand if needed

-He slowly turns the both of you around

-Its a kid

-‘You guys dropped this’

-Its a bracelet you bought

-You say thanks and take it back

-The kid blanches. He grabs a piece of his hair and awkwardly scratches it, then throws it to the ground

-Its a purple ball

-Seriously what the fuck

-Dabi panics and moves his hand

-Nothing comes out

-All might is running at you yelling to let go of one of his students

-But you arent his student

-Does he mean the kid in front of you

-Dabi is panicking youre both stuck in place

-And then the floor falls under your feet

-Dabi puts his palm back on your shoulder pressing down to keep you close

-And you fall into the bar hideout, shigaraki pacing and toga, twice, and shuichi all watching you

-Toga is asking about deku, twice comments how uncool it is for dabi to not even say a villain one liner to the heroes and shuichi is grateful you guys are back but thinks dabi is an idiot for not keeping on moving

-It unconsciously puts a target on dabi’s back, the heroes cannot have it confirmed that the masked man who had you was in league with the league of villains

-Twice, toga, and shuichi all take turns hanging out with you

-Twice likes to be dramatic so you guys get screenplays and act out scenes together

-Toga likes to do boy talk and make up and shop online

-Shuichi likes to watch anime. The sword fighting ones that are super philosophical. Kill la kill. Attack on titan. THAT philosophical stuff.

-They go away on missions often but they always come back with stuff, plants, flowers, something from the outside world

-You have not been able to go back out after the shopping district incident

-Dabi realizes from your amnesia you cant read

-He bought you a very cheesy very embarrassing very risque manga

-He teaches you to read, do math and you learn it all very very fast

-Its more remembering than relearning

-He also brings music

-You all have small dance parties together and kurogiri doesn't mind

-Shigaraki is NOT invited he just stands and. Watches. Its unsettling.

-Kurogiri teaches you how to make drinks in a flashy bartender style

-Dabi tests out what you make

-You two typically spend time casually but movie nights with you all is fun

-And then they have a big mission to go on

-He has to go to a forest camping trip to take one of the students

-Hes gone for about three hours before coming back 

-Kurogiri and shigaraki have you go upstairs

-They lock you in

-You can hear angry yelling and then it gets muffled

-You go to sleep for the night

-You wake up from the door being unlocked and yelling

-Dabi pulls your blankets back and you are immediately awake

-A little embarrassed to be caught in your star and rainbow pajamas

-He puts one hand under your chin and makes you look at him

-Toga is behind him saying not to

-Twice is saying that theyre being rude for barging in

-Dabi talks “what do you remember?”

-“I don’t remember anything.”

-He turns to twice and toga “told you everything is fine”

-He looks at you, “remember that outfit from the shopping district? Change into it. We have a guest”

-Its a simple outfit, a big hoodie, casual jeans and a white t shirt with a smiley face heart on it

-You step out of your room and dabi is in his same outfit

-He puts a hand on your shoulder and saunters down the stair with you

-He looks smug

-You come downstairs and there is a boy with spiky blond hair yelling muffled things from behind a steel mask

-His hands are bound too

-You think that this must not be a nice guy

-Shigaraki is hunched over at the bar while twice and toga are laying on the couch

-Spiky haired blond boy looks surprised to see you

-Dabis hand drops to your waist and spiky hair’s eyes follow it

-He looks angry and starts thrashing

-You take a step back but dabi’s hand keeps you in place

-“Are you willing to listen now?”

-Dabi takes a seat in a one person chair and you sit on the armrest

-Shigaraki gives a big long winded speech about everything wrong with society and how heroes are not bettering society but protecting the one thats already in place

-Dabi eventually gives you a tug and sits you in his lap

-Spiky hair has his eyes on you the whole time and he starts yelling again when dabi puts a hand on your knee and rests his chin on top of your head

-You don’t like this kid, he seems violent

-Thats how the first day of bakugo’s kidnapping goes

-Bakugou has to sit and see you his upper classmen crush sit in the lap of a villain and look at him with fear

-You’ve been here this whole time, why haven’t you left?

-Shigaraki wants you two to play this up, wants dabi to pursue you and rile you up in order to help break bakugou’s spirit

-Enter fake dating au

-Becomes real when all might saves you and dabi almost loses you when one for all forcefully opens the portal

-Bakugou is so angry to have you then lose you again

-You and dabi live happily ever after uwu

[tumblunni]

Me in the hospital: i cannot sleep for 24 hours, the slightest noise is blaring, i am perpetually anxiety adrenaline

As soon as i get home: has the best sleep of my life

I usually take an hour to get to sleep each night but i totally just curled up like a snail and dropped into dreamland instantly. And i woke up to a nice warm house cos the heating turned on while i was asleep, and now all the anesthetic is completely worn off so i feel energized and great! And my throat pain has eased up so thankfully i wont have to be liquids only for as long as i thought. I was all hyperactive and cooked a great fancy omelette and it tastes like heaven itself! Its so weird how stuff tastes slightly diffetent when its the first time youve been able to chew with the right side of your mouth in five years. I guess the tastebuds on the sides of your tongue are slightly different? When i eat everything now im gonna be rolling it all over my mouth like WOW ITS ALL SO NEW AGAIN! Will probably look nuts in the middle of mcdonalds with my cheeks puffed like a squirrel XD

Oh and this is also a great excuse to drink loads of chocolate milkshakes from my milkshake viking mug! I feel so energized with calcium and yums!! EVERYTHING TASTES SO NEWWWWWWW

Oh man i do feel a bit sleepy again now after just being up for a few hours tho. I have these good jaw pain specific medicines i have to take for the next two weeks til my followup appointment to check if theres any infection left. But man i feel SO ALIVE AGAIN im pretty sure all the rot is gone! It feels so wild having space in my mouth and not constant clenchy tightness. It actually hurts less recovering from the surgery than it did before, lol! I can feel all my teeth moving apart again and loosening up into normality and the gums healing up all their injuries and oh god i just love how they cleaned out all the broken parts of my teeth and capped them with these great replacements that look so real you'd never be able to tell! My smile looks not ugly!! My smile looks not ugly!! Aaaaa! I just expected regaining the right side of my mouth, i didbt expect to e like "holy shit it must have hurt even more than i realized cos this feels so amazing now". Like i guess i got used to putting up with it and forgot how it felt to not have painmouth? Underestimated how good a teeth can be! And man i never asked for reconstructive cosmetic stuff too but they did these caps and aaa my teeth never looked his good even when they were new!! My front teeth were always crooked even before they did the weird balogna slam together and shattered into a pile of crap. And now they look like perfect supermodel teeth!! The only side effect is that its a lil hard to get used to the lack of gaps between them now after so long dealing with the shattered mess. My tongue keeps being like "oh no did something get stuck in the gaps again oh wait there arent any" and then i subconsciously try to clean them after taking every bite and just bite my tongue instead. Man i never noticed i picked up a bunch of weird mannerismd cos of tje bad teeth! I was constantly paranoidly checking my mouth 24/7 in case the slightest thing made it even worse, and eating super gently so that nothing accidentally touched the Wrong Tooth and set off a jolt of pain. And i actually needed to get a filling put in on the leftmost back tooth that was the ONLY TOOTH I COULD USE TO EAT WITHOUT PAIN for all this time! Overuse of it meant that it got ground down a little and probably would have become painful too if i'd left it any longer. Then i really would have been all soups all the time and that sucks!! Soups are good but nothing but then gives u stomach issues. The bad poops!!

Man sorry im rambling so much im just so hyper and happy and also still kinda dopily sleepy! Im not still delirious or anything i just feel the happy kind of sleepy where the anesthetic is all gone and its not "oh god i cant stay awake" and more natural sleepyness of a long day being over and everything being okay. I had such a good long nap and i feel well rested after getting so little sleep beforehand due to all the dumb anxiety. And i still feel dozey but happy doze~

Anyway its awesometo be able to really chug and crunch a foods! With the other side of my mouth i forgot about! And taste milkshake to its fullest extent!! Oh and whats weird is that the reconstructive surgery capping on my front teeth means that theyre kinda one tooth now? The caps are all linked in a single piece to fill the gaps fully without even the natural ones you'd have on healthy teeth. So its like a solid tooth guard just sculpted to look like three teeth. Itll be tricky to train myself out of thts subconcious rubbing the gaps with my tongue when theyre not even there. But i expect once i get over the unfamiliarity this triple cap will be really useful! Theyre totes reinforced so that even if i do get tight mouth problems again and the front teeth take the brunt of the pressure, now theres no gaps to smash into each other and become a painful mess. Its like scaffolding reinforcing my whole mouth by fixing the loadbearing beam, or something.

Oh also these pain meds make u a little bit more sleepy than normal paracetamol so i'll probably doze off again soon. But hopefully i will have slept off most of the "healing debt exhaustion" tomorrow and will be able to go walk down the shops and buy some icecream and other soft food. I mostly stocked up on purely liquid food cos i tjought my mouth function would be more limited. But honestly the teeth are working so much better than before, they were already so swollen and painful that i couldnt crunch stuff! Now the mild discomfort of mid-healing from surgery feels like barely anything and i bet i could bite thru a goddamn rock right now! I just cant really swallow crunchy stuff or stuff thats too salty or citrusy. I didnt even know about the stabbity throat pipe so i didnt expect it to be the most painful part that takes the longest to heal. It feels so weird cos i keep coughing like my brain thinks theres phelgm stuck in my throat when its actually a skin flap/blister from the insertion. So obviously that aint going anywhere and i have to try and force myself not to cough or swallow or else i set off this cjain of "must get thing out of throat must puke" reflex. And the pain feels like a sore throat but it isnt?? Its not really inflamed ot anything its just an actual friction burn on the opening of my airway. Which is not a common occurance so the brain is justvlike "what the fuck is happening, must send all contradicting signals at once!" So sore throat medicine wont work cos that goes down your throat passage to your stomach when really this lil skin tag blister thing is in the lung throat opening thing. And sucking on throat sweets made it worse cos all the muscles were really tense around the area where the tube was inserted, hence why it was hard to swallow food even tho it was my windpipe that hurt. And sucking on something is kinda like perpetually swallowing nothing, when you think about it? Im glad that the muscle tenseness is mostly gone now and the painkillers are helping with the ouch, and my brainis getting usedto not coughing and making it worse. But still should eat soft easily swallowable stuff for a lil while and it'll be fun to go aroundthe shops with my last pocketful of change and find neat ingredients to stick in omelettes. Im so excited to taste all my favourite things in new HD functional mouth power!!! And i can smile at the shopkeeper!!!

And oh man i really do think that my sleeping problems with stiff neck and that kind of 'bloodrush to the head' migraine were indeed part of the bad wisdom teeth bleeding internally under the gum. I thought it had to be that cos nothing else in my life changed around that time aside from getting a better and healthier bed which should have been beneficial to my neck. And even going back to sleepong on the floor like before didnt make a difference so it definately wasnt the bed! And it kept getting worse while nothing was changing, and i kept trying different things like changing my pillows and headphones and cutting caffeine out of my diet and eating more salt and eating less salt and fuckin ANYTHING ELSE cos i knew if it really was the dumb tooth being infected then there was nothong i could do about it til my surgery day arrived. Itd be such a relief to know for sure that it was indeed the tooth and now that nonsense is gonna be gone forever! But also thats really worrying to know that it was getting so bad it could have spread an infection to my jawbone and the top of my spine if itd been left much longer. I kept sneezing up blood lumps like the size of a fifty pence piece! Had never had nosebleeds for a decade and now suddenly all the time! God it feels so good to be able to lay my head down and not feel all woozy and tense im the forehead or neck. I really hope this good neck untenseness continues and the awful aches really were just the tooth. But everyone in the hospital was so nice that i think even if i do need a second surgery to check for jaw infection then id be able to be less nervoud than i was this time

Man do u ever get that thing where youre so peaceful and contented that like you can breathe easier? Like subconciously taking bigger breaths and the middle of your chest feels slightly puffed out and warm. I guess thats what the "heart leaping in yout chest" idiom is meant to refer to, lol! Or maybe i can just literally breathe easier cos the tooth pain might have been passing into my nasal cavity too, lol. My entire head feels so less tense!! Its like all my bones were rebelling against me and now they're at peace again!! Man i feel so giddy happy like i chugged a giant energy drink or something but its the opposite its a good sleeps drink XD

So im gonna go lie down again and have a relax and watch a movie or something and see if i pass out when the medicine kicks in, or if its not too bad and i can still continue my hyper mood. But my nap was so long that its too late to go to the shops now anyway so i'll just make more plain omelette and milkshake if i get hungry. I mean it doesnt taste plain when all my sense of taste is so amplified likethis! I dont mind if its all i can eat all week. PURE MILKSHAKEY DECADENCE

Aaaaa im just so happy!! I missed my chance to get the new. Kingdlm hearts but ive beenwaiting fkr this surgery for ages too and it feels like just as much of an exciting relief!

[punkscowardschampions]

Carly & Ali

Carly: heard from drew? Carly: long shot Ali: Ha, good one Carls Ali: God no Ali: he's AWOL? Carly: yea Carly: gimme calebs number? Carly: longer shot Ali: 'Course but doubt they're chillin' Ali: and he might act like saying his name invokes him to pop up like a demon but you know Ali: Have you spoken to Meena? Surely he's keeping her in the loop Carly: shes not picking up Carly: to me Carly: same as my mum and dad Ali: That's not like her, she's probably just busy, keep trying Ali: As for your 'rents, where have they gone? And why do you need Drew so urgent? Gah, sorry, so many questions Ali: Just go with this one, are you okay? Carly: ive been trying ages Carly: shes not on spanish time idk why she cant answer Carly: idk wot to do Carly: how do i get it to stop ?? Ali: Spain's only an hour ahead of us anyway, not an excuse Ali: I'm 8 hours ahead and I've managed Ali: get what to stop babe Carly: the crying Carly: i cant think Carly: its all it does Ali: You've had the baby Ali: how long ago? did you go to the hospital? you need to if you haven't, like now Carly: what Carly: why would i go there Carly: its over with Ali: Because you both need to be checked over Ali: its really important Ali: have you birthed the placenta? Is it all out? If not you could die Ali: Never mind if there's anything wrong with the baby Ali: Call a cab and give me your deets, I'll transfer the money now Carly: that alien shit Carly: yea Carly: it screams healthy Ali: that is a good sign but there could be something you're missing, maybe that's why its screaming? better safe than sorry, they're not allowed to ask you about shit unrelated, so if you're high, sober up and then go, yeah? Ali: When did you last do a feed? Have you been able to? They'll show you how, it can be tricky Carly: id scream if i was born here Carly: gonna be stuck Carly: sober up? i need more Carly: shit hurts dont need to tell you Ali: They'll give you stuff at the Hospital Ali: why do you think anyone goes? Ali: and fo free baby gurl! please Carly: i cant Carly: gotta be hear for when my mum rings back Carly: & drew might come Ali: Give me your mums number and I'll tell her where you are Ali: then she can ring the hospital and they'll let you know Ali: I bet Drew has a key, no? Ali: Leave a note Carly: he left it when he went Carly: threw it at me Ali: Oh bab Ali: I'm sorry Ali: but you gotta focus on you Ali: and the baby now Ali: Not him, he knows where you are Ali: I can text him if you want, or try to call Ali: I swear nothing bad will come out of it Carly: but its his Carly: and i am Carly: he should be here Ali: But he isn't Ali: maybe he'll come back but you gotta keep going 'til he does, alright? Carly: i need to find him Ali: Not right now Ali: next step Ali: he's not lost, he doesn't want to be found Ali: i know that's harsh but its the truth Ali: he'll come back when he's ready, alright? Carly: what about me Carly: im not ready Carly: he doesnt care Carly: why should i Ali: he cares about himself Ali: AT LEAST do that Ali: if you can't the baby then the people at the hospital will help with that too Ali: you can't just leave it Ali: boy or girl? Carly: its a girl Carly: another one Carly: hes gonna be mad Ali: I don't think he's salty about not having a male heir babe Ali: If you really won't go...I'll do my best to tell you what I know and I'll send you links Ali: we'll do our best health check and then you've got to try to feed her, yeah? Is that okay? Carly: mad that shes here Carly: i said i wasnt having one Carly: you want me to read? cant hear myself think Ali: But you were Ali: and if you were doing it without protection then he was fully aware it was a possibility Ali: I'll voice memo you then Ali: it'll stop the crying Carly: he says its not his Carly: maybe not Carly: idk Carly: its got blood on it but could look like him when thats gone Ali: He said that to me when it definitely was so kind of his go to Ali: but even if it isn't, doesn't mean he has to be a dick to you about it Ali: Its not right regardless Ali: Especially not when you're alone Carly: how do i make it sleep Carly: im tired Carly: should i sing? Ali: That might help yeah Ali: Skin to skin to, that's comforting Ali: Lemme break down how you feed it, yeah? Hold on Carly: i cant pick it up what if i drop it fuck no Carly: gotta stay where it is Ali: You won't Ali: its your baby, its safer with you than it is on the floor Ali: get a towel, that'll keep it warm and put it to your chest Ali: [Sends 38 sec video] okay, if that's easier this vid shows you how but I'm here to talk you through Carly: all the towels are wet Carly: it can have my tshirt thats warm Ali: Good idea, see Ali: you know what you're doing Ali: you've got this Carly: its too small Carly: i have to put it back down Carly: ill hurt it Carly: fuming about me coming near it Ali: She's just hungry and confused Ali: Understandable, right? Dunno about you but I'd be pretty fucked off too if I'd just been pushed out my nice comfy home of the last 9 months Ali: You'll be her best friend in my time at all Carly: id put it back if i could Carly: whyd you wanna do this 3 times Ali: 'Cos I'm a bossy bitch and I want underlings to do my bidding and I get to tell 'em what to do Ali: speaking of, time for your masterclass Ali: get her and get comfy on the sofa or your bed or wherever is bed Ali: best Carly: k Carly: shes heavy wtf Ali: That's good! You did a good job cooking her then Ali: and if she's a lil chunk, this should be easier Carly: shes small but im sleepy Ali: you can both take a snooze when this is done, usually conks 'em right out Ali: is your tiddy out? Carly: knew you fancied me Ali: you know Ali: getting in there while your defenses are down Carly: im single Carly: you too Ali: Lets do it mama Ali: cutest fam ever? i think so Carly: shes not cute like yours Carly: weird coloured thing Ali: she's probably covered in the gunk and pink from screaming her head off Ali: no ones finest hour i bet she's beautiful Carly: ill get it to take a selfie Ali: yay! get it on the nip 'cos i gotta see my boo too 😍 Ali: line her nose up with your nip, kinda tickle her top lip with it, she should open her mouth wide Ali: then you can shove it in Carly: done that before Carly: weird Carly: [Sends pic of tiny baby Indie] Carly: does she look like him idk Ali: Definitely Ali: Looks a bit like Edie Carly: ill send him the pic Carly: probs should take a better one Carly: how do i look? Ali: Like you've just given birth Ali: so a goddess Ali: but a knackered one Carly: youve got a fetish Carly: cant trust that Ali: me??? Ali: didn't impregnate myself Ali: look at Caleb! Carly: and drew Carly: wont see him Ali: Clearly its his thing too Ali: but he's more about the before than after yeah Ali: he can't stay away forever Ali: he wouldn't leave Meena Carly: youre smart Carly: if i go there he cant avoid me Ali: Exactly Ali: Camp out Ali: Ana will help you with the baby shit if you like Carly: why Carly: she doesnt know me Ali: Because she's a good person Ali: plus she's a social worker, it what she do Ali: and she knows Drew better than most, she raised him Ali: worth a shot Carly: shes not his mum Carly: but she can take this kid Ali: yeah she's better than Ali: is that what you want? Ali: she'll discuss it with you, make sure you both get what's best Carly: im not talking to her Carly: she can take it or not Ali: No one will just take her with no questions asked Carls Ali: for your welfare and the kids Carly: im not answering a social workers questions Ali: They're not entitled to judge you Ali: She won't Ali: and as far as drugs are concerned, if you want to give the baby up then literally none of their business at all after that Ali: and if you did decide to keep her then they work with you Ali: they're not gonna just shop you, it ain't like that Carly: make me go to rehab is how its like Carly: fuck no Ali: They can't make you Ali: there's no point Ali: you can only get sober if that's what you want Carly: my mum and dad'll make me Carly: i know theyre gonna Ali: well, where the fuck are they now? Ali: if they're so concerned about you they'd be here Ali: actually supporting you Carly: theyll come when they find out about her Carly: i never told them Ali: Good, I hope they do Ali: but how did that happen Ali: how could I see and they didn't Ali: or Drew Carly: they dont come back Carly: drew did see thats why he left Ali: yeah but they must talk to you Ali: your mum has obviously been there how did she not clock something being up Ali: and not soon enough in Drew's case Carly: i call them if i need money Carly: they gotta think its why im calling now Ali: When do they call you? Carly: if i call and they didnt pick up Carly: unless theyre busy Ali: I see Ali: how's she doing? done feeding? Carly: sleeping Carly: how are yours? Ali: best feeling ever, right? Ali: much the same, its late here Ali: I'm pulling an all-nighter lowkey, finishing up some work Carly: i miss junie Carly: whatever your on for it gimme some Ali: i'd be creepy and snap him sleeping but no doubt the flash would wake his highness Ali: he misses you too, i'll get him to facetime Carly: aw Carly: go work bitch Carly: i shouldnt kept you this long Ali: don't be daft Ali: queen of multitasking Ali: and not just junie who misses you is it Ali: #massiveLESBIANcrush Carly: my tits are gonna go down Carly: snap me up now Ali: Trying, like Ali: make it facebook official Ali: that'll get the lads attention ey Ali: why else do it Carly: yea Carly: my parents too probs Carly: lapsed catholics Ali: be on the next plane over to get you back on the dick like Ali: i'll get on it #longdistancelesbians Ali: my ex gonna be so mad Carly: mine too Carly: wtf am i gonna do Carly: I dont want him to be an ex Ali: even though he's fucked you over like this? Carly: i fucked him over first Carly: i lied Ali: not really Ali: if anything, you lied to yourself Ali: but you didn't wanna hear it, couldn't Ali: and that makes sense Carly: cant block it out any more Carly: fuck Ali: it gets really real really fast Ali: doesn't it Ali: but you have got this Ali: i've got you, however i can, yeah? Carly: i dont want it to be Carly: i dont want it Carly: i cant do this Ali: okay, that's okay too Ali: but she isn't going to just go Ali: whether it was getting an abortion earlier or what you have to do now Ali: you have to do something Ali: there's no quick fix for it Ali: ana can get you in touch with the right people who will make it as easy as they can for you and her Ali: or my mum Carly: if i leave her she'll get found Carly: why does nobody ever call me back wtf Ali: Yeah but they'll still try to find you Ali: or Drew Ali: and his DNA will be on the system so Ali: and I reckon if they got to him, he'd sell you out Ali: when's the last time you slept? Carly: idk Carly: what day is it Ali: Tuesday Carly: sunday Carly: saturday Carly: idk Ali: fuck girl Ali: you shoulda been banking up on it before Carly: ha Carly: easy fix Carly: need my dealer Ali: not if your gonna be breastfeeding Ali: unless he gonna bring formula too Carly: i can go myself for that Carly: get a car Ali: you getting enough cash in, yeah? Carly: ha no Carly: no student loans for this bitch Ali: you'll have to look into getting help with that Ali: there's funds and shit, i'll find out the info Ali: that or tap Drew up for child maintenance Carly: yea cos hes declaring his earnings Carly: i wish hed talk to me Ali: exactly, bribe him like Ali: he's got a lot to lose Carly: hed never forgive me Carly: i cant Ali: but you can forgive him for all he does? Ali: got it bad honey Carly: yea Carly: its fucked Ali: is there anything he could do to make you stop loving him Carly: idk Carly: why Ali: cos you'd be happier if you didn't Ali: right Ali: like, he treats you like shit Carly: i wasnt happy before Carly: & he hasnt this whole time Carly: it got bad Carly: me too Ali: but you could be Ali: you don't have to give up hope of ever being Ali: and he did for the majority of the time though, that should outweigh the good Carly: with what Carly: this kid Carly: im not you Ali: no Ali: of being happy Ali: with just you Ali: or someone else who treats you better Carly: i dont have a job or friends here and i live in a caravan Carly: not gonna happen Ali: you can get both Ali: you're cool Carly: ha Carly: youre dreaming Carly: fucked the allnighter Ali: i'm not the only one Ali: and why not? Carly: drew says im a junkie Ali: what does he know Ali: and anyway, functioning junkie Ali: shits possible Carly: he knows me Carly: he loved me til i fucked it Ali: you haven't DONE anything Ali: a baby happened to you BOTH Ali: you're both reacting, right or wrong now, whatever Ali: and he probably still does but Ali: love ain't always enough Carly: why are you my friend? Ali: I said, you're cool Ali: funny, smart, nice, you already know i fancy you so no need to kiss arse any more, yeah? Ali: you're SO friendable, babe Carly: shoulda fallen for you Ali: yeah well, the tragedy of being straight and feelings not following logic Ali: sometimes, you gotta fuck feelings tho, do right by yourself Carly: i dont feel anything when he isnt here Carly: nothing happens Carly: cept today Ali: make stuff happen Ali: its only chaos darling Carly: youre not here either Carly: what am i gonna make happen on my own Carly: this shit Carly: idk Ali: what do you wanna make happen Ali: anything, however unlikely you think it is Carly: i want him to come back Carly: my parents too Carly: but none of them are Ali: can't control other people nah but you can do all YOU can to make it happen Ali: what would make him come back? who would he wanna be with? and you can try to talk to your 'rents and tell them what is up...longshot but maybe they don't realise how shitty they're being Carly: they're not Carly: theyre busy Carly: and im not a kid Ali: busy with what? Ali: living it up in spain? Ali: they kept you, you're their kid for life Ali: they don't get to peace at 16, 18 whatever the fuck Carly: they didnt vanish Carly: i know where they are Ali: yeah but they should be here rn Ali: you need them Ali: maybe if you ask, when they answer, they will come back Ali: i'm not slagging on 'em, its just facts Carly: i dont want to go live in spain Carly: fact is theyll try and force me Ali: well, they can't make ya, tell them why you wanna stay here Ali: they could still be supportive Ali: even if they're not physically with you every day like Carly: they wont let me stay for him Ali: okay...make something more parent friendly up then Ali: what they don't know won't hurt 'em Carly: youre so smart Ali: so i've been told Ali: with varying levels of sarcasm Carly: yea Carly: same Ali: You are though Ali: One of the many reasons we get along Carly: youre such a mum Carly: bigging me up like Ali: s'what i do best right Ali: shoulda been a cheerleader, fucking irish schools not letting me shine Carly: thats what schools do best Carly: be shit Ali: true dat Ali: even if my uni is pretty swish Ali: and full of nerds like me Carly: looks it Ali: still, miss the homeland like Carly: switch places Carly: shes crying again what does she want this time Carly: headfuck Ali: think its a bit too early for her to have shat, maybe wee but Ali: probably wanting her next feed Ali: you do it roughly every 2 hours for the first month Carly: ffs Carly: howd you get anything done with 3 of them Ali: ask myself the same question Ali: luckily they're not all on the tit 'cos form an orderly queue lads Carly: not getting my tit out again Ali: its that or formula run to get her to stop crying Carly: i cant put her in the car Carly: she'd fall out Ali: that solves that then honey Ali: get 'em out get 'em out get 'em out Carly: perv Ali: 🤷 Ali: single mum, gotta get my kicks where i can yo Carly: get fucked Carly: not offering Carly: one of the nerds would be up for it Ali: no need to tell me Ali: desperation station Ali: bless 'em Carly: do you go to class with your shoulders and knees out Ali: its boiling here, not even trying to be a shameless hussy Ali: can't be swooning erryday, got places to be, shitty bums to wipe Carly: yea Carly: cant steal that excuse myself Ali: sadly not Ali: can use breastfeeding though Ali: you're just out here feeding ya kid, looking hot as a by-product, fight me world Carly: don't Carly: how is this happening Carly: im looking at her and idk Ali: i can't believe you did it all by yourself Ali: you're a right tough nut Ali: but you don't have to keep doing it alone Carly: but i have to do something Carly: wtf Ali: yeah, keep both of yas alive until you figure out your next step Carly: make it sound simple Ali: 'course Ali: i'll allow you some melodrama but i can't claim hormones as hard Carly: u can Carly: and homesickness Ali: alright, lets have a good sob Carly: this kids done enough Carly: has you beat bitch Ali: rude Ali: already winning fresh out the womb Carly: what you naming it Carly: said you would Ali: you're serious? Carly: idc Ali: probs think on that a bit longer, whether you wanna name her or nah Ali: but my lists be ready don't fret Carly: k

[atravelersseoul]

Flight and First day in Seoul

6.24.17~6.26.17

Our flight to Toronto left Columbus around 10:30. It was a fairly small flight, seating no more than 50 people. It was a pretty fast and easy flight, which was lucky because the bathroom was broken on that plane, so that could have been disastrous.

We got into Toronto and the airport may have looked small from the outside but the inside was very big, fancy and artsy; they had mini art galleries and shopping boutiques; there was a coach store and a Victoria secret store. Our connecting flight to Seoul was delayed by about 25 minutes so we all decided to get some snacks and whatnot since we were all hangry.

After about an hour and a half we boarded the connecting flight to Seoul and the take off preparations/safety instructions were very interesting; they were repeated in about 5 languages: English and french because we were in Canada, and then Korean, Chinese and Japanese because we were flying into Seoul. i can’t really remember, but there might have been Spanish too, for some reason. For about the first few hours we were very excited about the flight: the food, the mini television screens that had everything you could want on them. We all watched a movie together but towards the end of that one I was starting to doze off every now and then. During that movie we got our first meal which was a dinner. It was surprisingly very good, especially for being airplane food. The main part was rice with marinated beef, cabbage and lettuce. There was also a salad, bread, and a brownie.

 At this point it already felt like it had been forever since we had been on the plane even though it had only been roughly 3 hours, so I decided to try and get some sleep even though we had all been playing on staying up so that we could been on the time zone when we got there. It was not a very deep or comfortable sleep but I did what I could. When I woke up I looked through some more movies and shows and found some episodes of the middle so I watched all of those. I then found an episode of fairly odd parents and watched that. With nothing much else to do I watched the latest bourne movie. Somewhere in the middle of that we got a small snack that had a mini sandwich, pretzels, some type of cracker/cookie, and I ended up getting some coffee to help me stay up. I finished the bourne movie and finally picked a Korean movie to watch. Id heard that it was really good so I decided to watch it…I ended up crying at the end, it was sooo sad…even though it was in the comedy section. towards the last few hours of the flight we got a breakfast and that was even better than the dinner. We got an omelet with sausage and potatoes and a spinach sauce. There was also a fruit cup and bread.

The descent and landing was a bit rough; there was a lot of turbulence, probably the most I have ever felt. There were a few times that you could actually feel the plane drop for a second or two and you could feel your stomach drop. It was almost like we were on a roller coaster. The landing itself went pretty smoothly though.

After we landed we had about 3 hours until the shuttle bus left to take us to the dorms so we exchanged currency, got some food and other little things we needed to do. at that point we were all just so exhausted and wanted to get back and sleep as soon as possible. once we got on the shuttle we had about an hour drive from Incheon airport back to the dorms which are about half an hour outside the very middle of Seoul. The drive there was very interesting, the way people drive here is insane, especially the bus drivers. People just weave in and out, and change lanes so fast and seemingly without a care. When we got to around the campus the driver had no idea where our specific building was or where to drop us off so he just stopped the bus in the middle of the road to call someone and ask where to go…that was very mind boggling. When we eventually figured out where to go, walking to the building was a whole other adventure in itself. I don’t think there is a flat piece of ground anywhere in this city, so we had to lug our bags up and down multiple hills to get to the dorm. On one very steep hill one girl accidentally let go of her bag and it went flying down the street and almost took someone out. that gave me so much second hand embarrassment, it’ll last me enough for a lifetime.

We got to the dorm around 10pm and had to do some stuff for check in and whatnot. Once we got to the rooms we realized there were several things that we were all missing, so we all went down to the convenience store that is right around the corner. Let me tell you, the convenience stores in America have nothing on the ones here, they are amazing. They literally have everything you could need and everything is so cheap. They have an entire section just dedicated to different types of ramen and they even have a ramen making station, complete with a microwave. They know what they're doing here. One big thing was that none of the rooms had toilet paper so we bought two giant packs to share with pretty much the entire hallway, but we have not really given them to anyone yet so I currently have about 15 rolls of toilet paper sitting under my desk.

Once we got everything we headed back to the rooms because everyone was pretty tired. I ended up just taking a shower and then going to sleep. Another thing that is awesome is the shower. The whole bathroom itself is pretty much the shower; the floor in the bathroom is about an inch or two below the floor in the rest of the room, and there is a drain in the shower but also in the middle of the floor outside of the shower door. That way, it doesn’t matter if you get water everywhere…it stays in the bathroom and drains.

Waking up the next day was kinda hard because we had to meet the program staff outside the building at 8am sharp to head to our orientation at the program office in the city. The trek there was the first time we were all going to be taking public transportation to the city, and the transit system here is very intimidating at first. In the Seoul metropolitan area, I believe there is a total of 18 subway lines and I don’t even want to think about the buses. Despite it being scary, the transit system is sooo nice and it works so well, so much better than in the US. To ride the subway and buses you have to buy a card, called a “T-Money” card. You basically just load money onto that card every now and then to scan and pay at the stations. Whats really nice is that if you need to take the bus after the subway, it doesn’t charge you for the bus if you get on it within 30 minutes of getting off the subway.

So getting to the office wasn’t too hard but it was really frustrating. The third party program that we went through that brought us to Korea University had a total of 66 students in it. taking 66 american students on the subway is very complicated and very headache inducing. Especially when a lot of these students are heavily reinforcing the stereotype of loud obnoxious Americans by being so loud to the point of being disrespectful. But we mad it there in one piece without being scolded so I guess that’s a mission accomplished. From the subway we had to walk quite a ways to get to the building and it was scorching hot. From what I recall it was around 85 degrees with 80% humidity: I was literally dripping sweat. While we were all dying of heat, there were so many people that we saw walking that were in pants or long sleeves that looked perfectly fine, not a drop of sweat on them.

Once we got to the building they told us that the office was on the 11th floor, which was somewhat shocking. That is one very cool thing about the city, everything is just stacked on top of each other. Since Korea itself does not have a lot of land, (apparently the entire country is smaller than Minnesota), things are built upwards instead of outwards. The building however only had one elevator and only took like 6 people at a time, so at some point we just decided to take the stairs, which was a bad idea. By the time we got to the top, I felt very American. I was sweating buckets, breathing like I’d run a marathon and it made me realize how long it’s been since I last exercised.

The orientation itself wasn’t too interesting, just going over stuff we needed to know about classes and safety and whatnot, and it lasted way too long. After we got done, they took us to Gwanghwamun market that was nearby for lunch. We didn’t have a lot of time so we found a little place to just stop by and get some food at. We got some ddeokboki which is spicy rice cake and I got naengmyun which is a buckwheat noodle soup. It took longer than expected so we had to leave before we could finish all the food so we felt pretty bad, but we were gonna be late if we didn’t.

after lunch we headed to Gwanghwamun square that is a big plaza in the middle of an eight lane highway that leads up to Gyeongbok Palace. In the square, there are two statues, one of Admiral Yi Sun Shin and one of King Sejong, who invented hangul, the written alphabet during the Joseon dynasty. Across from the square in the main gate of Gyeongbok palace, which was the royal palace of the Joseon dynasty and was built in 1395. It was really just incredible to see this beautiful old palace right in the middle of the city among huge modern buildings. Inside the palace it was amazing to see a lot people in hanbok, which is the traditional Korean dress. It seemed like a lot of people, especially couples go there to take pictures in their hanboks. The architecture was absolutely breathtaking and it was hard to take in how big the whole place was. It really made me wonder about what it would have been like when it was built and what life was like inside of it. everything about it was just so beautiful and incredible, it was so amazing to be able to walk around and experience it.

one funny thing was we actually met someone from ohio while we were walking around. We wanted to take a group picture next to one of the buildings and the person we asked to take our picture was from here. He was actually a part of the broadway tour that was performing the musical Chicago in seoul, so that was just very interesting to meet someone coincidentally like that.

After touring the palace, we went to a shop that rented out hanboks and had sessions for people to try them on and take pictures. It was definitely a new and interesting experience, but it was towards the end of the day so we all were tired and sweaty and probably smelled really bad. but after we finished there, we were done with group activities so they just released us into the city to do whatever and then find our own way back. Amanda has a friend who lives in seoul and owns a brewery/restraurant so we headed to one of his restaurants in Hyundai Mall for dinner around 6. I ordered some chicken and ended up getting what seemed like 2 whole chickens, I think there was around 20 wings, so I definitely did not finish them all. While we were eating we saw a mini stand that was serving drinks in lightbulbs. It was the cutest thing and we simply could not pass it up. It was called “Bulb Smoothie” and for some reason that just cracked us up. The guy working the stand was very cute and charming so that made it even better hehe. We ended up staying until the mall closed at 9 and then made the long ride back to the dorms and pretty much knocked out as soon as we got in our rooms. We had early morning the next day for another orientation so we all wanted some good sleep.

I think i’ll save the next day for a different post so this one doesn’t turn into a novel, although it’s already pretty long by now. So if you made it this far, all the way to the end I applaud you.

-Bea