#they've been here all day all i want to do is let my dogs outside :(

[herofell]

send memes so i can write starters (knife emoji)

[optimist-pine]

Returns

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

Warnings: None

Summary: Daryl finds something in his pack that doesn't belong to him... (ps. it's yours)

Era: Season 2, the farm

A/n: This is a silly little thank you for everyone who's been supporting my writing! If you've liked/commented/reblogged any of my works recently, this is for you. :)

Daryl digs around in his backpack, shoving aside arrow bits and extra clothes in the search for a clean(ish) rag he knows is buried in here somewhere. Ah, there, the glimpse of a red hue must be what he's looking for. He tugs it free, but as he brings it into the daylight it comes to his attention that this piece of cloth doesn't belong to him.

He drops it immediately, head swiveling to make sure nobody saw. But no, he's tucked far away from the rest of the group, not a soul in sight. He gingerly picks up the garment before realizing how ridiculous he's being and shoves it in his pocket. He'll slip into your tent, return it, and get the hell out of there and get on with the rest of his day.

Everyone's either dispersed to other parts of the farm or busy enough completing whatever chores they've taken on to notice him. Even if he didn't already know which tent was yours, it'd be obvious from the plethora of herbs and flowers hanging to dry by the entrance, and the dog-eared foraging guidebook waiting on a lawn chair for your return.

He peers through the screen window to assure himself that you're not around before unzipping the door and stepping inside. A moment too late, he realizes the amount of dirt he's just tracked into your otherwise pristine living space, and curses. Nothing to do about it now he supposes. He squats down, opening your pack and pulling the wayward item out of his pocket.

"Daryl? What're you doing in my-" Your voice makes him jump before your words falter.

His head snaps to you; you're bent down a bit, hands on your hips with sweat dripping down your temple. Your mouth is stuck in a cute little "o" of pure confusion. He's frozen, hand halfway between him and your belongings, lungs stuck mid-breath. He really should say something in his own defense.

"Is that my underwear?" You ask a little more quietly.

"I - uh..." He gapes. He's invading your privacy in so many ways, you're going to think he's a total ass if not a complete creep. And he actually doesn't mind you too much so he doesn't want you to think of him in that way. Not that you think of him at all. But now when you do you're going to hate his guts. "They - uh..." He tries.

"Ohh. I get it." You say, nodding, like this all makes total sense. "I've got something of yours I've been meaning to return, just wasn't sure how to make it not-awkward..." You kneel down beside him, fishing around in a side compartment on your bag. "Buuuut no matter. I believe these belong to you." You hold out a pair of faded boxers that've been rolled up neatly.

"Hey, Rick wants to know if-" Glenn appears in the tent opening and Daryl can practically see the gears struggling to turn in his head as he takes in the two of you so close together, each obviously holding the other's intimates. "Y'know what? Nevermind. Just go talk to Rick when you're done or whatever, okay?" He sighs, walking away.

Daryl wastes no time grabbing his boxers, shoving them in his pocket. You do the same but with more grace, standing to brush off your pants.

You let out a small chuckle, biting down a bit on your lip. "It was so hectic when we left the CDC; must've grabbed each other's stuff then." You step outside and he follows. "Thanks for returning them." You say, stooping to re-zip the tent.

The CDC is such a blur that it takes effort to remember. There weren't enough rooms for everyone and so you'd asked to bunk with him. Even though he was sufficiently intoxicated that night, he'd been lucid enough to appreciate not being alone, your steady breaths in the unsettling darkness had quieted his nerves.

He can't seem to make his eyes stay on you for long, though that doesn't stop your gaze from lingering - he can practically feel every place your eyes land as you study him. "S'no problem." He shrugs.

"Well, I guess I'd better go see what Rick wants..." you sigh, making no noticeable effort to go anywhere.

You're leaving a space for him to say something but he doesn't really have anything to add to that. "Yeah." He replies dumbly.

A soft smile grows upon your lips. "Don't be a stranger, okay? Some of us actually enjoy your company." You nudge his shoulder good-naturedly as you walk away.

He mulls over your words, trying dissect what that last little bit means. You were just being kind, right? He's pretty sure people have barely put up with his company, let alone enjoyed it. Realizing you've already been gone for multiple minutes he pushes those thoughts to the back of his mind and trudges off, noting that there's at least a few hours of good daylight left to make use of. But those thoughts are still there, nagging, toying with him.

---

A couple of days later, when Daryl returns to his camp after a successful enough trip into the woods, there sits your well-loved guidebook. It's laying on the ground where you must've set it when you stopped by earlier and forgotten it when the two of you headed out. He picks it up, flipping through the bent pages and your frequent notes when he passes one that makes him stop and turn back. Next to chanterelle mushrooms you've scribbled 'Daryl - pair w/ venison' . He hadn't caught game that big since back at the quarry, and even then the geeks got to it first. A small swell of pride rises within him at the thought of you planning ahead in this way, of you counting on him to provide.

The feeling follows him as he settles down for the night. Pulling out a flashlight he figures he might as well see if there's anything he can learn from your book... Or maybe that's just an excuse to search for more of your annotations. He'll have another return to make in the morning, but he can't quite bring himself to mind all that much.

[thisapplepielife]

Written for @steddie-week.

All Hours

Day #1 - Prompt: Secret Relationship | Word Count: 1125 | Rating: T | CW: Language | POV: Steve | Tags: Post S4, Eddie Munson Lives, Good Uncle Wayne Munson, Steve & Wayne

Steve parks outside of the trailer park and walks in. Careful to avoid the streetlights and the corners where there are known yapping dogs.

He approaches Eddie's window on the back side of the new trailer, and moves to push open the screen, to let himself inside without waking up Eddie, or Wayne. He just hikes his foot up into the sill when he's startled. 

"We do have a front door, you know," comes the lazy drawl, and Steve nearly jumps out of his skin, heart hammering wildly in his chest. He tries to suck in a breath, gripping the edge of the window frame, finally looking over at Wayne as he sits on the back steps, cigarette burning between his fingers.

"I'm sorry," Steve says, taking a step back from the house, pulling the window closed, putting some distance between himself and the room where Eddie is surely sleeping.

Eddie sleeps all the time these days. The doctors swear it's just part of his healing process, the recovery, but Steve still worries. All the time. Everyday. It's impossible not to. Eddie's healed so slowly, after being so close to death, that Steve's terrified he'll never fully recover.

"C'mere, kid," Wayne says, and pats the step beside him. 

Steve goes, but is a little wary. Wayne and him haven't really spent that much time together, they were just ships passing in the night while Eddie was in the hospital. Each taking their turn, and then handing the baton off to the other.

Steve sits down, and folds his hands in his lap.

"I know you've been sneaking in and out of his window during all hours of the day and night, for, well, months now," Wayne says, just barely above a murmur. 

"I'm sorry. I just worry about him," Steve says, and that's the truth. Most of it, anyway. 

There have been a couple quick, tentative kisses, but that's it. Eddie isn't strong enough for anything else, definitely nothing as tawdry as Wayne seems to be implying. It's pretty innocent, this thing they've got going. 

Steve's snuck in a lot of windows in his lifetime, but none compare to crawling over the sill of Eddie's window, and onto the chair Eddie now leaves there to ease Steve's entrance. None have been as chaste as this either. Steve's never spent months pursuing someone, hell, loving someone, that he didn't win over.

Even Robin, he counts as a win. It's platonic love, for sure, but he worked his Harrington charm on her, and got her to love him.

"I know you worry, but we have a front door. You're welcome to use it. Day or night," Wayne says, low and almost too soft to hear, even in the still of the night.

"Oh," Steve says, like this hadn't been something he'd ever considered, and honestly, it hasn't been, "okay."

"Okay," Wayne agrees, and he digs in his shirt pocket and fishes out a single key on a ring. "Here. So I can lock it. I worry about him, about someone coming after him again. And I wanted to put better locks on all the windows, but Eddie protested. Any idea why?" Wayne asks, and it's playful, in a very dry way.

Steve laughs, reaching out and taking the key, closing his hand around it, tight.

"Okay, I'll come through the door."

"Thank you," Wayne says.

"And I'll help with the window locks. If you want," Steve offers, and Wayne nods, like he's accepting this offer.

Now, Steve isn't sure if he should get up and leave, or keep sitting, or what. He stays.

"I don't care, you know," Wayne finally says.

"Don't care?" Steve questions, wanting him to clarify. 

"If you boys are more than friends," Wayne says, and Steve hadn't expected it.

"Oh," Steve breathes out.

"He's my boy, and I want him to be happy. Whatever that means for him," Wayne explains and Steve suddenly feels like his eyes are burning.

He wishes his dad would be as invested in his happiness as Wayne clearly is about Eddie's.

"Thank you," Steve says, "it's…nothing, not really. We're just friends."

Wayne turns to look at him, and grins, "If you say so."

Steve feels like he's lying, even if he isn't. Not really.

"But we could be more than that, maybe, someday. When he's feeling better. Maybe, if he's interested in that," Steve rambles.

Wayne smiles, takes a deep drag on his cigarette, and blows it up into the night sky, "Oh, he's definitely interested. Steve Harrington this, Steve Harrington that. Let me tell you. I've heard your name more in the past few months than I've heard my own."

Steve laughs at that, unexpected and far too loud, and it doesn't take long before Eddie's bedroom window is being shoved open, his head popping out. His hair is a mess, tangled and frizzy, but he's on his feet, and that's a damn good look on him.

It's a beautiful sight. But he always is.

"What? Are you two having fun without me?" Eddie asks, like he's not at all surprised to see them together. Like this whole sneaking through the window thing wasn't a top secret operation.

Was it not a secret?

Steve turns back towards Wayne, "How long have you known I was coming through the window?"

"Since the first night," Wayne admits, "I heard you floundering in, and came to the door to check on him, but I heard Eddie laughing, so I knew he was okay. I asked him in the morning who was making such a racket, and he said it was you."

Steve laughs at himself, apparently he was trying to be stealthy for Eddie's benefit, but they weren't on the same page.

"C'mon in, Harrington. Henderson brought over some new tapes earlier," Eddie says, and Steve stands.

Wayne nods his head towards the back door, "It's unlocked. But your key will work there, too."

And Steve pulls it open, heading towards Eddie's room. Eddie is back in bed, propped up, remote in hand for the VCR Steve had set up in Eddie's room months ago, thinking they'd get better use out of it here, than Steve would at home, these days.

Steve settles next to him, "What do we got tonight?"

"Back to the Future, have you seen it?" Eddie asks.

"Only while very drugged by the Russians," Steve admits, "it'll be nice to see it again."

Steve's sure there's no chance Eddie will stay awake for an entire movie, but he'll be happy to sit with him, no matter what.

"You're so weird, Harrington," Eddie says, but it sounds affectionate, and Steve will take it, as Eddie leans his head on Steve's shoulder.

"Yeah, well. Back at ya, Munson."

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddie-week and follow along with the fun!

[jamiebluewind]

Eclipse the kitten update

(please don't glitch tumblr it's the tenth time I've tried!!!)

Previous post

Welp! Winter's boy has a respiratory infection. It was causing him to wheeze so to the vet we went! Luckily it wasn't a diaphram issue (which had us worried because of his umbilical hernia). His hernia also came up normal on his x-rays.

(X-rays left out because might bother people, but I can send them on request)

He's on meds several times a day and taking them like a champ, but had to be put in a pen with limited free playtime (because nothing will stop Mr Indestructible from running around the house with all the grace of a car with no breaks). We DID get a reply after just a week from a really nice person who was going to give us one (shocked us let me tell ya because it was BIG dog sized). Unfortunately, they left it outside for us to pick up and someone else just... took it. Right out of their yard. And since all we had was a small cat carrier to keep him in (which was kinda cruel for more than a day or two tops), we ordered a cat playpen that we got for a decent price. We kept looking until it got here, but no luck. Still! It's a nice playpen and we have it set up so he doesn't have to jump if he doesn't want to (plus more vertical to enjoy later on). Sarah's mom also let us borrow her water fountain!

We went to a new vet as ours was booked up (and he had already been wheezing a day). Everyone basically fell in love with him instantly. He left with a little toy from the tech, they gave Winter a jar of honey (one of the people in the office has bees and they wanted to give her something for caring about a kitten that most wouldn't have despite him having a treatable condition), and they've been checking in on how he is recovering (very well since I first typed this actually). He's basically got an entire vet office wrapped around his little paw.

Also, the non-profit we're taking him to for his surgery had a cancelation and his got moved up to the 12th! Counting down the days yall.

Because I gotta kinda mention it, this hit us where it hurts. Between the vet visit and testing, the pen, and the estimated cost for the surgery and followup, it's gonna cost us more than $2k (as long as nothing ELSE goes wrong). We're lucky that we're all super careful with our money, but there's only so much we can save up with three people below the poverty line. Still worth it though. I mean, look at this doofus

He is so stubborn that we can't leave scratch posts upright because he keeps doing THIS! XD

I'm linking Winter's paypal, but I 1000% understand if you can't help out. Still, a reblog and a word or three mean a LOT to all of us so if you got a minute, I'd love some new post additions to show Winter.

(Truth be told, the only reason all the updates are posted on my tumblr is because I'm the longest winded out of the three of us and I take like 5 billion pictures. XD )

Speaking of, there WOULD be a bonus pic of him and his sister (Melanite, aka Miel) playing under my chair as my cat (Danny) looks on from a safe place, but tumblr kept glitching when I added it.

Edit: surgery update

[miraculous-magicalconnections]

Miraculous: Magical Connections Power Changes

I went over certain power changes briefly in my backstory rewrites, but I wanted to go into more detail as well as add a specific link to the master post I have pinned

Let's get into it (keep in mind, certain things won't be said to avoid spoilers even if you're reading this after things have been revealed)

No Changes:

Rabbit Miraculous (Only it's concept which is now Time)

Turtle Miraculous

Monkey Miraculous

Mouse Miraculous

Eagle Miraculous

The Prodigious

Weapon Changes:

Goat/Rooster/Dog/Horse Miraculous:

All four of the original weapons (Paintbrush, fountain pen, ball, and horseshoe respectively) were not good weapons, so I changed them to keep the same feeling as the original but actually work as proper weapons

The Goat now has a bat, the Rooster has a dagger, the Dog has a flail, and the Horse has a tekkō (the tekkō is similar to that of brass knuckles and resembles a horseshoe)

Pig/Snake Miraculous:

Neither of these weapons (tambourine and lyre respectively) fit and unlike the other four, they aren't even on brand with the power or animal, so they've been changed to be good weapons and fit with them better

The Pig now has a rapier, a weapon that needs precision to use as it is a stabbing, not a slicing weapon, and the Snake now has a whip, a fitting choice for it as it resembles a snake tail (both of these also play into their powers)

Minor Changes/Tweaks:

Cat/Bee/Horse/Fox Miraculous:

When the user activates their Cataclysm/Venom/Voyage/Mirage, it won't start their timer until the use it, meaning they can also deactivate it after it's been primed (This is only the case for these four as these do not immediately activate)

Bee Miraculous:

The user sets the time for Venom to last, ranging from seconds to hours to days (depending on the experience of the user), however if the user doesn't have a set time it'll simply be "Indefinite" as it'll either disappear when the user wants it to or when the user detransforms (or an outside force frees them)

Cat Miraculous:

We've seen before that the Cataclysm can spread; however it can only spread if it is the same item, so it could be spread further and faster along something like a billboard, but the moment the user's hand is not touching something it'll stop

Dog Miraculous:

It's not a simple touch anymore because it was too easy to do accidentally, now the user most use the end of their flail (the weapon was changed) and say "Sniff" to activate it, and "Fetch" to retrieve it like in canon

Fox Miraculous:

We've seen this in canon, but it's never been clarified, so I wanted too here: it's possible to create a "scene" of illusions which will not all disappear when one is disrupted (ie; an illusion of Ladybug and Chat won't both be disrupted if the Ladybug illusion is)

Ladybug Miraculous:

Very small tweak that the power adapts not only to the user but to the villain, while this is sort of true in canon, I wanted that to be more apparent here

For example, if Marinette were to fight Mr. Pigeon, she'd get a coin for the vending machine, if it were Adrien, he'd get a clothes pin because of his allergies and fight him head on, if it were Alya, she'd get a bird call to confuse the pigeons and so on

Peafowl Miraculous:

When an Amok uses negative emotions it creates a Sentimonster, whereas if it uses positive emotions, it creates a Sentibeing

The name of the Miraculous has also been changed to Peafowl

Major Changes:

The "Miraculous Ladybug" Ability:

It still exists but in concept but in concept alone, the entire power has been reworked to be less overpowered and not be an undo button at the end of each battle

The first change is that, to use it, it can only be used by combining the magic of the Ladybug and Cat Miraculous (not unification, but two holders combining their powers)

The second is that it can only fix damage directly caused by magic, so it'll put the animal's that Animan controlled back in the zoo, but if Ladybug ripped out a streetlight it wouldn't fix it since, while it was her enhanced strength that did it, it wasn't magic in nature

The third is that this power takes a lot of energy from both Ladybug and Chat Noir AND Tikki and Plagg, meaning this isn't something that can be done constantly without taking a physical toll on the users

Butterfly Miraculous:

The thing is, there wasn't anything wrong with them before, but since I wanted to reduce the Ladybug Miraculous to not being a magic fix-all, I had to change how the power worked

Akuma and Kamiko are the same and work identically with the exception that Kamiko target positive emotions and Akuma target negative emotions, so Akuma aren't just a reverse of a positive power because none of the Miraculous are inherently good or bad

Second, if the Butterfly wielder recalls their Akuma/Kamiko, it'll stay powered and can be reused, however if it is forceable removed (Ie; Ladybug/Chat Noir breaking the item it's possessing) the magic will disappear completely; however, either way once the Akuma/Kamiko is no longer possessing an item, all the magic disappears and everything that needs the magic to work will go back to normal (ie; Reflekta's clones, Syren's water, and Kung Food's mind control)

While this isn't really a change, I wanted to clarify that if someone is unwilling Akumatized OR Kamikotized, they'll only remember fragments or it'll be fuzzy, in other words they don't just have a gap in their memory, rather it's just not a clear image of what happened

Dragon Miraculous:

The Dragon's power was one of the MOST powerful in canon, and since it was three-in-one, I needed to fix that

The power is now "Storm Dragon" which transforms their body into a cloud-like state in which they can control wind, water, and lightning; however, as a tradeoff, they cannot physically interact with anything while in this state

This basically puts them into a ghost-like state, however magic can still affect them the same way their magic can affect others

Goat Miraculous:

Originally the power was being able to create any one object (or set of objects) but not only does that directly interfere with the Ladybug, given it's, y'know, the concept of creation, plus it just being an overall boring power, I changed it to be "Magic Repel"

This makes it so any and all physical, mental, and magical attacks don't do anything, however this only lasts for five minutes (regardless of their timer) and they still feel the effects even if it leaves no physical/mental damage

Ox Miraculous:

I changed the power because I decided to make it better and give it to the Goat instead, plus I wanted to go with a popular headcanon/theory for it instead

Stampede increases the Ox holder's strength, stamina, and speed to superhuman level, allowing them to act as a one man stampede

Rooster Miraculous:

Like the Dragon Miraculous, the Rooster's canon ability is too overpowered, especially since it can quite literally cross dimensions

To play into the whole "Mother Hen" phrase, I gave the Rooster the ability to heal any and all injuries of a person under the pretense that they could otherwise heal from it, so it can't be used to bring people back from the dead or save them if they otherwise cannot be saved

It also cannot heal emotional, mental, or spiritual damage unless it was directly caused by a magical source, so it's mostly for physical injuries

Snake Miraculous:

To keep from the ability crossing over into Fluff's concept of time, I changed the power to instead focus more on the user's true intuition

Ontological shows the user anywhere from a few to thousands of possible future timelines, forcing them to figure out what the best course of action is at any given moment, this will also update whenever something drastic enough happens to change their entire future (ie; Ladybug's identity is exposed)

(The name Ontological comes from the Ontological Paradox in which a future event causes a past event which therefore causes a future event)

Tiger Miraculous:

I liked the idea of the Tiger being invisibility, so I went with it (especially since the Ox now had super strength)

While invisible, the user's heat signature is also gone, and they also become much quieter, however they aren't silent

[plaguethewaters]

little superhero au thingie!! except the superhero part is super duper nonexistent and this chapter is litterally just cbeeduo proposal. Enjoy!

---

"You've gotta forgive me, because I'm about to get really sappy here."

Ranboo says, and Tubbo thinks it's awfully ironic. It's night, brilliant stars shining over them - the only true advantage of no public lighting at all - they're on the roof, sitting on the thickest blanket they own and huddling together for whatever warmth they can find, the few remnants of their picnic laid abandoned to the side. They've been out all evening, eating sweets and heart shaped sandwiches, because Ranboo had always been a little extra. He thinks, we've gotten past the sappiness threshold a whole lot ago, and also, there's no way whatever you've got to say could be worse than this romance novel ass- situation.

His hand is taken into Ranboo's, who starts rubbing at his knuckles with his thumb. He does that often, when he's nervous - but also, Tubbo muses, he's nervous about pretty much every single aspect of his life, so this isn't anything new. Then he starts talking, with a way too big, almost suspicious smile on his face, his voice low.

"You know I don't- I don't think I've ever been as happy as I am now. I didn't know this kind of happy even existed, I think, not until you two came into my life." His gaze is soft and, as previously anticipated, unworldly sappy. "You've made me truly content with my life in entirely new ways, and continue to do so every single day. I can't really imagine my future without you in it."

"You're making this sound like a marriage proposal, bossman." Tubbo giggles, just to lighten the mood. Mostly because he's right, and he does not know if he could survive the weight of a love so, so fucking ginormous, settled on his shoulder's like the world's heavier and softer mountain, not without a little comedic relief.

"I mean..." Ranboo kisses his hand, doing a so-and-so gesture with his free one, "Kind of?"

The mountain doesn't move, and Tubbo's suffocating. This is not how he imagined he would die.

"I-uh. sorry?" he manages to shutter, while his mind helpfully supplies him with a series of his possible obituaries. "Young man dies of Too Much Emotion.". or "Romantic relationship actually a trap, Villain dies because Boyfriend loves him too much." (Boyfriend? Fiancè????? What the absolute hell.)

"I mean, i mean not now, obviously that's- that would be a little too much to dump on you so soon." Ranboo laughs, clearly as nervous as he looks. "Just, like, I've prepared a whole speech, goddammit, let me say it properly."

Tubbo sees the light. His heart is definitely going to explode.

"Okay I've, I've started this a little wrong. Because I said, right, I said, I can't imagine my life without you, but it's more like, like, I couldn't have imagined my life without you. I would've never even tried. I don't think I realized I could imagine a life for myself outside- outside of hero work. I either died at fifteen - or, or seventeen, or twenty, or whatever limit I decided to give myself that year - or got an eternity of work, no escape at all. Then, then you, and Tommy, and suddenly I'm dreaming of white picket fences and wedding bells and large breed dogs and- did you know I was a writer? When I was little, I used to have notebooks over notebooks full of short horror stories, and then I stopped because with housework and normal work and trying not to starve I never had the time - you've made me want to write again. You made me realize I could dream, and follow those dreams and succeed."

The speech comes out rushed, all too many words confined in all too little space, too little time. He sounds like he's afraid if he doesn't speak soon enough, someone is going to come and steal his voice, leaving his feelings forever entrapped.

His gaze shifts, and now he's staring directly into Tubbo's eyes. The intensity is overwhelming, oppressive, painful. His eyes bore into Tubbo's skull with the force of a drill, carving a hole from his eye socket to the center of his brain, then making a little cave in it and resting in it's center.

"I don't- marriage right now would not be a good idea, I don't think, but? Maybe, in the future... Will you marry me?"

Their stares break, and the parasite removes itself from Tubbo's poor, poor brain. Then he's playing with Tubbo's fingers, looking blushy and shy to the side - because of course he's nervous now, after completely destroying him, leaving unable to think anything but an infinite sting of I love yous and wondering how on earth he got this lucky and fuck. Tubbo would die a thousand times over if it got him to look this pretty again.

What the hell was he supposed to say now? He isn't, and has never really been good with words, not when actions and punches have always done the job just as well - how could he speak now, having been hit in the face with a confession like that? With the, the- he would call it the burden, he guesses, but that's just entirely the wrong word - the responsibility, the knowledge he's the reason Ranboo was able to grow and get through all of that, given to him like it is no big deal. He would've never thought of that. In fact, he was worried he'd been doing way too little support wise, lacking the knowledge and emotional maturity needed to properly help someone like that.

Like even now, after the whole speech, he still isn't all that convinced. All he ever did was love Ranboo - which isn't news, and would continue not to be news as far as he's concerned. He loves him, will love him even if he somewhat disagrees with the confession, because how could he be possibly worth so much in Ranboo's eyes, who deserves so much more than he could possibly give, and he loves him so much - but he does not know how to say any of that.

So, he just kisses him.

And again, and again, trying to push into his lips anything that cannot fit into his mouth and failing still, but nobody's to say he doesn't fucking try. When he stops, it's because his traitorous body runs out of air to breathe, but he still keeps as close as possible, resting his forehead on Ranboo's. If he has to stop to breathe, they'll fucking share the breaths too.

----

Ranboo has learned, by now, that Tubbo kisses like he's fighting.

Mostly by way of focus and determination: he kisses with the same kind of concentration one might have when operating a sniper rifle - or, much more topically, when defusing a tickling bomb. There's no second in which he's idle, any rest clearly ruled by strict necessity rather than any want or will. When he does retreat, surrendering finally to the need of air, he doesn't part neither far nor long, touching their foreheads together or breathing in his neck, his hands mapping all available territory to make way for later exploration.

Ranboo has seen him battle, has fought him directly in the past, and he finds no difference between the crushing adrenaline of a missed punch, of wrestling for a loaded gun, of running towards a lit fuse - and whatever he is feeling right now.

A hand finds its way to his thigh, squeezing the soft flesh, and the little air he'd managed to keep in his poor lungs gets knocked out of him. Maybe they are in battle, actually. Maybe killing him is Tubbo's way of saying no.

Because - and he's said this already, but his brain is too scrambled to pay attention to something as utterly unimportant as repetition (anything less important than this). Because he's used to Tubbo, to the way he seems to equate love and war, to the almost violence of his affections but this feels... different, somehow. Somewhat. He's not focused enough to register what's actually changed.

Maybe it's the way his mind had already been lost in the anxiety of the moment, before his little speech, and the suspense for an answer now; or maybe it's just the thick layer of tears evenly coating each of their faces.

Which, by the way, does not help to ease his worries at all, to be entirely honest. Not that - don't get him wrong, it's not that the kissing isn't nice (heavenly, wonderful, amazing, showstopping and a plethora of other words that do not even come close) but it doesn't really enlighten him as to what Tubbo's answer is going to be. Is this a "Yes of course I'm going to marry you" type of kiss or more, like, "No how dare you ask that I'm kissing you just so you shut up" deal?

(Now, a normal person, in a hypothetical fictional audience, would probably butt in right about now with, let's say, a text to speech device of some sort. And they would say, with all the confidence of anonymity, they'd say: "Ranboo, this is a really stupid dilemma. Why would he ever choose to reject with a kiss? Nobody does that ever." And they would probably be right! But the hand is still on his thigh, and another hand is rubbing slow circles into his waist, and the kiss is still happening, so forgive him if his reasonings aren't all that rational right about now.)

He manages to detach himself eventually - not easily, not even particularly willingly - for the few moments absolutely necessary to regain a couple braincells and learn how to use his own mouth again.

"Uh- U, I, Is this-" Not to use it well, mind you, but he isn't going to complain. he'll take what he can get and deal with it. "Uhu-"

"What was that, bossman?" Tubbo giggles, voice still raspy from the assault to his lips, and Ranboo finds it somewhat insulting; loquacity is an absurd standard to hold for the guy currently being lobotomized.

"Wh- was that, uh" Tubbo's hand is slowly rubbing at his cheek in what was probably meant to be encouragement, but only manages to scramble his brains even more. "Was that a yes?

"No."

His stomach plummets.

He knows, logically, that he should not have expected anything. They've been dating for not even a year, and this was sprung on Tubbo so suddenly, and everyone always say to never ask if you aren't sure your partner will say yes but Ranboo will never be sure of anything in his life (at least not how he was sure this would've worked) and he needed to ask like, physically. And at the end of the day it's not like this is gonna mean anything for their relationship, because ring or not he knows Tubbo loves him (maybe, hopefully, because he cannot begin to imagine the contrary, it would tear him apart), but he had dared to hope-

"No," Tubbo continues, "I've just started making out with you, because that is how normal people reject proposals in real life." He's smiling, still caressing his cheek, and Ranboo wants to die a little less. He pointedly ignored the disembodied voice of the fictional audience member reminding him how they were right. (Just because you were doesn't mean you gotta act mean about it. Meanie.)

He groans, quite loudly, so that all of his horrible pain is heard, and hides his shameful face in the warm crook of Tubbo's neck.

"Never start a sentence like that ever again, for the love of god."

Tubbo laughs, bright and loud. "Oh, you poor baby", he croons, mockingly. Ranboo is being made fun of, but the guy doing it is exceptionally beautiful and also his fiance now, so all the haters are quite obviously just jealous.

"You're right though," Tubbo continues, "I wasn't quite finished answering."

Whatever smart, flirty and witty reply Ranboo could have given him gets swallowed by a chocking sound, as the push of lips and the warmth of hands pull him onto yet another battlefield.

---

"You know what would be really, really funny actually?" Tubbo asks, after everything is done. He's basically sitting in Ranboo's lap now, only one lonely knee left hanging on the blanket. They cuddle together tighter, mostly because they want to, but also because it got so cold on that roof once the sun went down and now it feels far below freezing.

"Hmmmm..." he rumbles, a content rumble (NOT. a purr. shut up.) so loud it almost hides his voice. "No, what would?"

"If we just pretended to be married already." Tubbo sits up a little bit.

"Just like. Hear me out."

"I'm hearing, I'm hearing."

"Okay, for one - we've got like, another full year before we would be able to actually get married and you and I both know I've got zero patience to wait that long. And we're like, super wanted criminals, so nobody would want to marry us even if we were legal, right?"

"Absolutely correct."

"And also. Think of the Bitches faces when we get into battle against them and we have wedding bands on, calling each other 'husband' and shit"

A pause.

"Oh, oh my god" They both start laughing at the same time, falling back into the blankets in a mountain of little giggles. The thought is, as expected, absolutely hilarious, and with the added giddiness of being able to be husbands, of loving each other that much - it doesn't look like they'll be stopping anytime soon.

The moon is high in the sky, the cold is still frigid, and their laughs are loud enough for several noise complaints. Tonight, they hug each other and go to bed. Tomorrow, chaos would begin for real.

[cannibal-nightmares]

did you know may is mental health awareness month?

text under the read more: an unreality ramble about my dog. he is a good boy.

have a peaceful song -

where do I even begin

I guess I'll start with that I don't like talking about my delusions. there's some I want to talk about but can't because they're either scary and/or too confusing in that theyre too real. or im "not allowed" to. but this one exists in a neutral space, so a neutral story this will be

I only got him when he was 1½ years old and he was kenneled at the shelter w another dog identical to him, but if he wasn't someone's service/emotional support animal, then he must have been in a past life. or he has a human consciousness. or something. my friends joke about the latter often but I'll get there in a second. the way he responds to my emotions and actions is uncanny. he is a rather quiet dog, but if he notices me freeze up and go quiet to an uncharacteristic degree, he will very blatantly try to get my attention. if I lie on the floor from anxiety, he will lie on my legs; if I lie on the floor in being depressed, he will get in my face. he's intervened self harm (namely hitting, but, if he's alert, he's interrupted trichotillomania episodes). The thing is, idk where he gets it from. I didn't train him to do any of these things

my friends joke that's he's "just a dude." "a man in a dog's body" etc. it *is* a funny joke. he likes people more than other dogs; his eye contact is oddly human-like (ask my friends). it *is* a funny joke, and the following isn't directly related, but I do have great fears about him. some of which the noise isn't going to let me say outloud here but. what I can: sometimes I fear it's true--an organic thought outside of what my friends have said, the two ideas don't feel the same--or perhaps that he was someone in a past life. or is a positive-neutral force sent to look after me. idk. it's hard to explain why while it would be/is theoretically positive, how it is still unnerving. and how it feels like something will change in one direction or another when I post this. I digress. He's just a guy. I have bigger fears on it, but that's the simple of it.

A coworker asked and suggested why I don't get a service dog. at first, I considered the question as courteous, but then realized... I struggle to walk my current dog, if I am honest. I do it, I take him out every day, etc, but as much as I got a dog to help me w paranoia, it has not curbed it. in ways, in ways, it has made it worse. countless of times I have tried to walk him around the block, made it halfway, and turned around due to feeling like a force was watching me, like something was waiting around the corner, like there were traps ahead, and many other more specific and pertinent things I am not allowed to say here (plus it'd be safer if I didnt). taking him outside is like flipping on a geiger counter to gauge the state of the day. I feel really bad for him in this. I can't imagine trying to get a proper service animal in these regards.

My friends like to joke that he's some sort of bending entity in that he's just shaped funny. I mean, he is. His legs are goofy-long, his nose is angled funny off of his snout, his ears are huge. Etc. But--again, separate from what they've said--sometimes I look at him and he doesn't feel real. It's difficult to explain. I look at him and it's like I'm missing something. Like how you can't reach into a tv and grab what's on the screen. idk.

The reason I'm saying all of this is because... As much as I am sometimes scared he isn't real to some degree, I consider that, even if he isn't, I think he's worth "wasting time" on. I love him, he's a good little guy, and so far, at least, everyone is pretending along. Sometimes I pick him up and feel like a question mark is above my head hahaha. Like I'm missing something. But he's worth my time. He's worth my time in the same way daydreaming can be fun. I don't know how to fckng word this. He is good. Real or not, he is good. I can't imagine trying to "prove" his "realness," and I also don't know how. I don't mind devoting time to him, real or not, because he is good. agh. I hope this makes sense. I've been sitting on these thoughts for at least three years now.

[titlemewickedwonderland]

The Manager (Ghost Fic) Chapter 7

Summary: The Ministry announces an outsider coming to be part of the congregation to help with the Ghost project as a tour manager; little did the Ghoul know; she is nothing like they pictured her or how she'd affect them all.

Support My Work!

Chapter 6

As the large group entered the carnival grounds, they were greeted by a grand entrance adorned with whimsical decorations. The air is filled with the enticing aroma of freshly popped popcorn, cotton candy, and sizzling hot dogs. Laughter and the sound of children's delight can be heard all around.

Strolling through the carnival, they encountered a myriad of attractions. There are classic rides like the Ferris wheel, spinning people high above the ground, offering breathtaking views of the entire carnival. The roller coasters race through thrilling loops and twists, eliciting screams and cheers from the brave riders.

Nearby, Ari found the enchanting carousel, its painted horses bobbing up and down to the melodies of a cheerful calliope and from Aurora's expression on her face, the short bubbly ghoulette wanted a turn immediately despite not being a child as she watched as children's laughter fills the air as they joyfully ride their favorite horses, parents proudly capturing these precious moments as they circled the safety gate.

Somewhere down the lane, the woman spotted various games of skill and chance, where you can try your hand at knocking down targets with a baseball, shooting hoops to win a prize, or popping balloons with darts which Dew and Phantom were betting on who could win the most from those kinds of games. Despite the rough start to the morning, the excitement builds as Ari and the ghouls watch the guests all around them as they compete with friends or family, cheering each other on and celebrating victories with gleeful shouts making the ghouls itch to try; she'd almost believe they've never been to a carnival before but the more she thought about it the more she realized...they probably hadn't or at least not in a very long time making her determined to salvage this day before they had to go perform.

"Let's keep looking around before we decide to go do anything; this place is huge."

Ari gently grabbed Mountain's arm who was standing by watching as a vibrant parade of street performers. Acrobats, jugglers, and magicians captivate the crowd with their astonishing tricks and stunts. She can't help but be amazed by their skills just as much as the peers; it had been such a long time since she'd gone to anything like this - not since she was a little girl.

But not only was this place huge and filled with delightful games to try their hands at Ari had to compel Rain and Aurora from the carnival's plentiful assortment of delicious treats and delicacies as they passed. From sugary funnel cakes dusted with powdered sugar to mouthwatering caramel apples and savory corn dogs, there's something to satisfy every craving she imagined and she knew these ghouls could pack one hell of a meal.

Finally pausing the group in a clear spot she examined their wide eyes and excited faces like toddlers having free range to their favorite toys and games, and well she couldn't help but smile too to see them so happy. Digging into her purse she grabbed a few envelopes handing each ghoul their own before holding up a finger.

"I already withdrew some cash from the ATM at the entrance while everybody was in line. You guys have $100 each to do as you please. Some of these games need tickets while others need actual money, so spend wisely; you can always go over there to that booth to buy more tickets if there is something you want to do that needs them as payment but until then here is this as well to help you along." she dug into her purse again and unraveled a roll up ring of red paper tickets and tore off 30 a piece of each of them.

"Ari~" Aurora clapped excitedly as she took them. "Thank you so much!" she smiled.

Ari returned it and nodded. "I know you guys don't have fun like kids very often so have at it. Just make sure to stay with the buddy system and call if you need anything. We have a few hours before we have to be on the road to the venue for sound check." she warned.

"You're the best!" the multi-ghoulette hugged her quickly before grabbing Cumulus and Cirrus by the arms to drag them away.

"I'm hitting the shooting game over there. You coming Phantom? I'll wipe your ass in a game." Swiss threw a thumb over his shoulder with a mischievous grin and Phantom returned it with a cocky one of his own.

"You wish, bitch. Bring it!" the pair walked off and Ari watched with amusement.

"If it's okay, I'm going to go grab a snack from one of the vendors! I don't think I've ever had a funnel cake before." Rain said biting his lip as he eyed the stand.

"Go have fun. Oh, and try those fried Oreos; they're pretty good too." Ari encouraged waving him off. Mountain ended up being dragged away by Rain as the water ghoul chatted his ear off about some sugary goodness.

That left Copia and Dewdrop with Ari. The former looked rather displeased and the latter bored as he stood with his arms crossed.

"What's that face for?" Ari sighed as she saw Copia staring down at the envelope of money and roll of tickets in his hand. But she already knew what he was going to say.

"This is a lot of money..."

"It is, but I don't mind. You pay more than enough to cover the balance." Ari replied before slanting a look at Dewdrop who was staring at the two with a look that screamed he was done with this topic.

"Copia...look." Ari sighed as she gently grabbed his arms; her face sincere and warm but resigned as she scanned his makeup-less face.

"I love you guys. And I promise I'm not breaking my bank account by spoiling you. I suppose my issue with your problem with me spending my money comes from a direction where someone dictated what I should use my money for. Your my friends and I want you guys to have fun; think outside the box and live a little every once in a while. I love the fact I can make the ghouls happy and hopefully make you happy too. Not just from my skill as a manager for you guys but as a friend. I feel as if you wrap yourself around work and tours that you've forgotten to have fun. When I took this job I promised you I would rather make memories and get to know you and the ghouls on a personal level - you guys are important to me and I want to make sure that you understand where I'm coming from so we don't have any more issue okay?" she searched his face as he said nothing for a long moment.

When she feared he may not say anything at all she finally noticed his shoulders slump and he nodded. "Si tesero. si. I understand." he finally replied and gave her a small smile before pulling her into a hug.

"Just don't think we want you to spend your time and money on us like this all the time."

Ari smiled hugging him back with a tight squeeze. "I won't do it all the time but this is what friends do for each other. And believe it or not...I don't have many." she peered up at him and he smiled slightly as he let her go.

"Alright then." he nodded before glancing up at one of the roller coasters.

The woman laughed a bit and nudged him. "Don't think I'm getting on one of those death traps. I'll mill around, maybe try my hand at getting Rain a goldfish or something." she chuckles. "Go enjoy yourself Papa."

He gave her a nod before heading away and the woman turned to Dewdrop with a raised brow. "What about you? What are you planning on doing?" she asked cocking her head before pointing over towards the stall Swiss and Phantom were gathering a crowd watching their competitive display.

"They seem like they are having some fun." she commented.

He watched her a long moment before he turned and pointed to the biggest attraction in the carnival - the Ferris wheel. She blinked at him before shrugging.

"Go on then."

"And leave you alone?" he snorted.

"I came here for you guys to enjoy yourself." Ari huffed playfully and plonked her butt onto a nearby bench behind them.

"You're part of this group, you deserve to have some fun too. Come on. It's boring to go on those things alone." Dew didn't wait for her reaction as he grabbed her wrist and dragged her back to her feet before heading for the ferris wheel line.

"Dew! I...I don't do heights." she hissed nervously looking up at the slowly turning wheel.

He smirked. "Scared?"

"Terrified." she wasn't even joking. Her hands were clammy and cold but she didn't miss the way Dewdrop seemed to sidle closer to her; his long guitarist fingers rubbing along the exposed skin of her wrist where he held it whether consciously or subconsciously at his gesture helped soothe her a little bit.

When it came time for them to board she gripped the railings so tightly her knuckles turned white and she stared down at her feet; a small whimper escaped her when the basket jolted upwards inch by inch when others went on below them.

"Hey, look. You are missing the best part." Dewdrop nudged her and she peeked an eye open at him to give him a glare.

"I rather not have a panic attack thank you very much I'm good staring at my feet." she hissed

The fire ghoul rolled his eyes at her and leaned back on the bench as he stared out at the view as they climbed higher in the sky. He could hear her muttering to herself; giving herself a pep talk to calm down - it kind of amused him seeing her so fragile for once and he found himself staring more at Ari than at the view.

And without thinking; he acted.

"Hey, Ari."

At the sound of his voice, the woman turned to look at him only to have a hand grip her jaw and pull her closer. Before she could even blink or take a breath she felt soft lips pressing against her own. Her eyes widened in shock when her brain slowly caught up with her to realize Dewdrop was kissing her.

It wasn't something she expected. Wasn't something she imagine ever to happen but her body reacted and her eyes slid closed of their own accord and she leaned into him; her fingers leaving the railing in favor of gripping his T-shirt to pull him closer until suddenly she lay on her back with him hovering over her.

The kiss had started innocently enough. Just a press of lips against each other but something sparked the longer the contact lasted and before she knew it his lips parted; guiding her own to do the same until she felt the wet glide of his tongue sliding into her mouth to meet her own tentative one. One long kiss turned into two and from there, her mind went hazy as her arms wrapped around his neck to hold him closer as his mouth moved against hers.

She didn't even register that she was high up in the sky right now in a metal bucket overlooking the view of the carnival as she felt her body heat up whether from her own reaction to the kiss or from Dewdrop's inhuman body heat as he pressed closer; his entire body - lean but strong pinned her down to the cushion of the bench as his lips tore from hers to trail along her jawline making her breath hitch as she felt him place wet open mouth kisses along her neck; his fingers leaving the grip they had on her waist to yank down the collar of her turtle neck sweater to give him more access to her pale skin.

"D-Dew..." she gripped the back of his shirt with trembling fingers.

The sound of her voice seemed to pull them both from the haze of whatever the hell this was and the man pulled back to look down at her; his blue eyes - so human unlike the orange glow of hellfire she was used to stared down at her with a look that was foggy and unfocused; she probably didn't look any better either as she stared back up at him with glassy half lidded eyes.

"Fuck." he cursed as he pulled himself from above her leaving her suddenly cold from the lack of his body's warmth as he took his place on the farthest side of the bench away from her and running his fingers through his long hair.

"Shit Ari. I'm sorry...I just..." he cleared his throat watching as she slowly got up off her back and pulled her shirt that had ridden up from his roaming hands back down to cover herself and fixed her hair.

"It's okay..." she swallowed looking away from him and out the window realizing they were descending back to the ground.

The cabin was filled with awkwardness as it finally stopped moving and the door opened to reveal the attendant who allowed them off the ferris wheel. Ari didn't look at anybody; afraid that if she did they'd be able to tell right away what had happened up there; but what had really happened? What was that all about anyway? She couldn't wrap her head around it.

When they got off; feet firmly planted on the ground once more a flood of relief rushed through her when she spotted Cumulus and Cirrus back at the spot they'd split up at and without a word rushed towards them with quick steps feeling her heart pounding in her chest.

"Hey, enjoying the fair?" she asked trying to put a smile on her face.

"Definitely! Want some?" Cirrus held out a stick of cotton candy she and Cumulus were sharing.

"Oh, thanks!" Ari grabbed a chunk of the fluffy candy floss and popped it into her mouth; sighing when it melted on her tongue with its sugary taste.

"Man it's been so long since I've had this stuff." she pulled off another small chunk; nibbling on it idly with her teeth as she caught the sight of Dew passing to join Mountain and Rain who were at the goldfish stand as the Earth Ghoul tried to win his packmate a little friend.

"What's that look for honey?" Cumulus touched Ari's shoulder making her jump in surprise not realizing she'd been staring so hard.

"Hmm? Oh, I'm fine!" the smile on her face was fake as fuck and she knew the women didn't buy it.

Seemingly understanding something the ghoulette's pulled Ari away from the earshot of their packmates and headed for a little merch stall to browse some cute items.

"What happened? Did Dew say something? We saw you guys get off the Ferris wheel together." Cumulus murmured as she browsed through some T-shirts.

"Dew kissed me." the manager blurted out causing the others to turn their heads so hard she was afraid they'd snap their spines.

"He did what?!" Cirrus gaped.

Ari covered her face with her hands and let out a shuddered breath. "Dew...kissed me." her gaze met the others as she lifted a hand to touch her lips as realization dawned on her face.

"And I think...I think I like it."

~

Chapter 8

[chiimeramanticore]

Part of the Band - Chapter 22 - Old Habits, Fresh Starts

Chapter summary: The gang goes to Showbiz to sign up as the venue's band. Beach Bear reunites with a friend. Dook tells an embarrassing story. A/N:

I may have been gone for four months but I assure you. this fic only dies when I do I don't have anything special to say for this chapter lol so notes from me are short today. here's hoping it won't be another 4 months until I update again 👍

Chapter word count: <- Chapter 21 - Chapter 23 -> Read it on AO3!

The restaurant is still preparing for opening day by the time the band arrives. The place smells strongly of paint, and you can't turn a corner without almost knocking someone over with supplies in their arms. Still, the group makes their way in and manages to find the cat they spoke to at the copier store.

"Hey, it's you guys!" He says upon catching their eye. "I wasn't sure you'd actually show up. But, ah– I am glad you're here, of course! I assume you're here to sign up to try out."

"Try out?" Mitzi asks.

"Sure," the cat says. "You guys aren't the only band who wants this stage, y'know. Nothing wrong with a little healthy competition, right?" He chuckles, though it comes out a bit tense. "I'll, ah, take you to see the boss."

The cat leads the group down a hallway toward the manager's office. They pass by a kitchen, and another room that seems to just be an open space.

"What's that?" Dook asks.

"Oh, that'll be the game room," the cat tells him. "We're expecting a bunch of arcade cabinets to come in soon."

Dook shoots an excited glance to his left, his gaze being met by Mitzi. She looks equally excited about this.

"Bet you guys'll get Space Invaders?" Mitzi says.

"Bet I'll cream you in it," Dook says to her.

"You wish!" Mitzi giggles.

Finally, the group stops outside the manager's office. The cat turns to them. "I think he's still finishing up with another group right now, so give him a minute first. I gotta go worry about these painters we hired who act like they're allergic to tarp." He bounces on his feet once, then turns to leave.

Beach Bear snickers. "Good luck, uh... I don't think you ever told us your name."

"Oh! Call me Crusty," the cat calls back. "Good luck with the boss!"

"Call him Crusty," Dook murmurs. Then, to Beach Bear, "Sounds familiar." Beach Bear scoffs, playfully nudging Dook.

The hallway they've all been led into is narrow, and not exactly comfortable in a large group. Thankfully, it's only a short while before the door to the office opens.

"Finally," Beach Bear says, approaching the door. He moves to step inside, only to be caught face to face with someone trying to leave. A mouse, with brown fur and blonde hair, only barely comparable to Beach Bear in height by way of the heels she's wearing.

"Mini?" Mitzi says, but she doesn't get a response. Mini and Beach Bear have locked eyes, and neither seem to be able to break the uncomfortable silence that follows. That is, until Beach Bear's mouth twitches into something resembling a confused smile, and he laughs.

"What are you doing h–?" He glances behind her, seeing a small group behind her also waiting to leave. A dog, a gorilla, a wolf, and... another polar bear. His smile quickly fades.

"I have other stuff going on," Mini replies calmly, quietly. "I hope you don't think my life revolves around you."

Beach Bear's eyes are transfixed on the other bear. "I... don't," he murmurs.

"I should be asking what you're doing here," Mini continues, still just as quiet, as if this conversation isn't for others to hear. "We signed up first."

"...Healthy competition," Beach Bear finally pries his eyes away and back to Mini. "Least, that's what Crusty said."

"We didn't know there was gonna be another band," Dook tries, but goes equally ignored.

Mini chews her lip for a moment, looking Beach Bear up and down. "You could let us out."

Beach Bear seems to be sizing her up just as much as she is him. "...You look good," he says. There's nothing sarcastic in his voice when he says it, but her expression finally sours anyway.

"You could move," she reiterates, a bit louder now.

Beach Bear steps aside, but then reaches an arm out, blocking the doorway. He glances back toward the other bear, but addresses Mini, "Who's the new guy?"

"Name's Bosco," the bear replies. His voice is deep, and he carries a perpetually sour expression on his face. Beach Bear bites his lip, a failed attempt at hiding his smirk. After another knowing look at Mini, he finally moves aside fully, letting them all out. Dook watches the group pass by him– Bosco is tall, taller than Beach Bear. Is he meant to be a replacement for him? Then, he looks toward Mitzi. She seems as surprised as anyone else... did she not know what her sister was planning?

"Well, ah–" He starts.

"Hey, what's with the hold up here?" A rat stands impatiently in the doorway. He's stout, about Mitzi's height, and is holding a fat, smoldering cigar. "You guys the next group or what?"

"Uh, y- yes!" Billy Bob stands. "Yessir. We're the Rock-afire Explosion, and–"

"Save it." The rat returns inside his office, waving a hand behind him for the rest of the group to follow.

The office is a small, smoky room, with stacks of paperwork and other little messes strewn about the desk and the floor. The walls are a dark olive green. A window on the right wall has its blinds pulled tightly closed. A paint can sits by the wall, left open. It seems even this place hasn't been exempt from the chaos of construction. The boss's desk sits at the center-back of the room, with a plush leather chair to match. The rat assumes his position in the chair, flicking his cigar over an ashtray. At the front of his desk is a name plaque: "Chuck E. Cheese - Chief Entertainment Officer."

"So," he says. "Real ragtag kinda group you guys got here. What kinda music do you do?"

"Rock and roll," Beach Bear answers.

"Well, hey, not entirely," Billy Bob says. "I might wanna write some country music, too."

"And I wanna sing pop music," Mitzi chimes in.

"Can't go wrong with a little soul, too," Fatz adds.

"Alright, alright!" Chuck says. "I'm puttin' you down as 'eclectic'." He doesn't move to write anything down. "Besides, having a multi-genre-capable sort of band works for us, needing a cover band and all that."

"A huh?" Billy Bob says.

"A cover band?" Chuck says. "Didn't any of you read the flyer?"

"That wasn't on the flyer," Beach Bear says.

Chuck pulls open a drawer on his desk and slaps a copy of the flyer onto the table. "There," he says, a finger pointing toward some small text along the bottom edge. "Says we're looking for a cover band. Is that gonna be a problem?"

"No problem at all," Billy Bob says quickly. "We're all fine doin' song covers, aren't we, guys?" The rest of the group all murmurs awkward agreement. "See? No problem."

"Alright, alright," Chuck mutters.

"Any other fine print we might've missed in there?" Fatz asks, half sarcastically.

"Oh, we can go through all the terms if you folks wanna," Chuck responds, fully sarcastic. But intent on following through, he opens another drawer and retrieves a stack of papers, slapping them down on the desk in a similar fashion. "Basically outlines the pay, the hours, the clientele–"

"Is there something special about the clientele?" Beach Bear asks.

"Sure is," Chuck says, "they're human."

The room goes quiet for a moment, everyone apparently at a loss for words. Then, after a beat, Mitzi says: "Why?"

"My mother was half human herself, on her father's side," Chuck says plainly.

"Really?" Dook says.

"No," Chuck says. "But we are still a human-friendly establishment. Not exclusively humans, mind you! But, y'know, they'll be around. That a problem?"

"No problem," Beach Bear says this time. "We're fine with humans." No one protests outright, but the air hangs a little tenser in the room.

"Good," Chuck says, and the tension finally eases. "I'm assumin' you're all willin' to work nights and weekends and what-have-you?"

"Of course," Billy Bob says.

"Great." Chuck opens a third drawer and pulls out a clipboard with a form on it. "Whichever of you is the most literate, come fill this out." Everyone looks at Fatz– save for Fatz, who looks at Beach Bear.

"What?" Fatz says. "He's the English major."

Beach Bear rolls his eyes and approaches the desk. He takes the clipboard and a pen from Chuck and moves to the side to fill it out.

"While he's doing that, any of you have any questions for me?" Chuck asks the rest of the group.

"...Is your last name really Cheese?" Mitzi asks.

"Your last name is Mozzarella," Dook says.

"Oh, right," she whispers. "What's the E stand for?"

"Entertainment," Chuck replies.

"That can't be your real name," Dook blurts. Chuck only responds with a smile.

Thankfully, it doesn't take much longer for Beach Bear to finish filling out the form. He hands it triumphantly to Chuck, who looks it over.

"What'd you say your band was called again...?" He squints, holding the paper an inch closer. "The Rock-afire Explosion?"

"That's us," Beach Bear says.

"Hm. Dumb name."

·–—–·

"So... Humans, huh?" Beach Bear says. The ride home has been pretty silent between the two of them, and Beach Bear only speaks up once they've pulled into their driveway.

"Yeah," Dook responds. "What do you think?"

"Ah, I don't care," Beach Bear says. "They look different, sure, but us working on stage doesn't really mean we'll have to interact with them. It'll be fine. Why, what do you think?"

"I dunno," Dook says. "I don't think humans are bad... I just don't know much about 'em."

"They're just people," Beach Bear assures him. "They're probably more scared of us than we are of them, ha."

"Should they be?"

"No! Of course not. But, I dunno... I guess I get their perspective. If I created a new form of life and it ran off and started doing its own thing, I'd probably be a little freaked out about it too."

Dook ponders this for a moment. "You don't think they think we're, like, monsters, right?"

Beach Bear laughs. "Probably not you. You're a big cuddly puppy dog. Me, though? I don't think most humans will ever even see a real polar bear in their lives."

"Have you seen one?" Dook asks, and Beach Bear shakes his head. On this note, they both leave the car and move into the house. Beach Bear heads to the kitchen to root around for snacks, while Dook wanders to the couch. He sits sideways, keeping an eye on Beach Bear.

"What if I do somethin' embarrassing?" Dook asks.

"What do you mean?" Beach Bear replies, his head inside the fridge.

"Like, on stage, in front of the humans. What if I say somethin' dumb?"

Beach Bear is quiet for a second before responding, "What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done?"

"...Huh?"

"What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done?" He repeats, finally moving to look at Dook. He shuts the fridge and moves toward the couch, soda can in hand.

Dook stutters a few times, unsure how to respond. It's not something he was planning to recall today. He's not even sure what his most embarrassing moment is. Beach Bear joins him on the couch now, sitting to his right.

"I can go first, if you want," he offers.

"I didn't know we were takin' turns."

"Sure. Like..." He thinks for a moment. "Mine was in the eighth grade. I had a crush on this girl– her name was Mindy." Beach Bear begins to describe his classmate, and Dook feels himself growing... disappointed. Of course Beach Bear likes girls. Had he been assuming he'd ever have a chance with him? Of course he doesn't. He finds himself withdrawing from the story, something about Beach Bear wanting to impress her during a school talent show and doing a poor job.

"Alright, your turn," Beach Bear says, and Dook blinks.

"Uh..." He'd already forgotten he was supposed to tell a story, too. "For me, it was..." He's still drawing a blank. "...It was also a girl. I, uhh, I wanted to impress her, so I..." His eyes meet Beach Bear's, who's watching him intently. He's so earnest... It's so unfair. "...So I joined her band," Dook says. "We were young, so the band didn't work out. And... turns out she didn't even like boys. So I never had a chance, anyway."

"Man," Beach Bear says. "That does suck."

"Why'd you ask me to tell you that?" Dook grumbles. He feels his face growing hot– he really has embarrassed himself.

"Because," Beach Bear says, putting a hand on Dook's back. "If you say something silly while we're on stage, I guarantee you it won't be as embarrassing as our most embarrassing moments. So you're gonna be fine!"

Beach Bear laughs, and Dook feels some awful mix of desire and shame. He wishes he could slap Beach Bear's hand away– how could he touch him like this after all but rejecting him? Yet at the same time, he wishes the moment could last forever, feeling the warmth from his palm bleed into his own body. It's selfish, it's greedy... it's humiliating.

If he can't keep it together, it could start getting in the way of the band, and cost them their job at Showbiz. He can't let that happen– not just for his own sake, but for everyone's in the band. So in that moment, Dook quietly makes a resolution to himself: he must swallow his feelings for Beach Bear, for good.

[masonscig]

can i ask why people in the fandom seem to really dislike mishka? (censoring her name and such) this is not meant in an offensive way to you or to anyone else, i’m just new here and kind of confused. like did she do something legitimately wrong or are people just irked by the writing of the new book? hope you have a great day <3

OH yeah sorry i can definitely see how that's confusing to new people LMAO

so, it's a bit of both imo – i've been here since 2020, shortly after book 2 dropped, so my perspective is a lot different than newer fans

so, one of the reasons i censor her name, is because tumblr changed the search functions – used to be, when you looked up something, it was only things that were in that exact word order in a tag – so if you spelled t/w/c wrong in some way, it'd only show up results that were misspelled, if that makes sense

but now, it's like if you look up any word, random posts that mention it anywhere in the post will show up too – and i would rather not open myself up to the m*shka bootlickers bc i just do not have time for that LMFAO

i rarely maintag things these days because i just don't want to be perceived by so much of this fandom, but that's just a me thing

also, in terms of what she did "wrong"... on top of problematic stuff in text, there's a few things i can think of off the top of my head:

encouraging white/washed art by reblogging on to her dev blog while knowingly having the official skintone palette locked behind a paywall (patreon)

when called out for the above, they did vet their pieces i guess – by only reblogging black and white pieces, and art of detectives. then they stopped reblogging art completely

posting a white hand for a morgan instagram edit – and taking hours to delete the harassment in the replies, some of which being actually racist comments with slurs pointed at black people

in a q&a video, referred to m as an "attack dog", which was super insensitive, considering the consistent comparison of m to an animal across all platforms (text, tumblr posts, patreon content)

her treatment of f over the years, both in text and outside of it. her asks were a huge reason that the fandom has an infantilized view of f and they don't even consider them to be a love interest (much less one that gets physically intimate). they see them as a child. this bullet point is a massive one that would take too long to explain. i could probably write an essay on how problematic it is to immediately "other" your singular black character by literally making them an otherworldly alien, but i do not have the time

how she writes nb/trans characters. from what my friends have said who code dive, they get the same dialogue and variants that women do. obviously if you don't code dive or play with nb characters you probably wouldn't notice, but there are a good chunk of people in the fandom who play with nb oc's so... this is something that should be better, but it's not

to add to the above, she said she was getting sensitivity readers but... did they do anything? look at book 3 and tell me if they actually did anything (i have a feeling maybe those sensitivity readers were white queer people)

overall, it's very hard to explain and condense the fuckery my mutuals and i have seen both m*shka do over the years, and what her fans have let slide/incidents they've coddled her up during.

sadly, she doesn't take hard stances on things. she just lets things happen and that just. doesn't bode well if your argument for all these mistakes is "ignorance". if she's getting 10k a month on patreon plus sales (not to mention the fact she's a grown ass woman), then... it's the bare minimum to ask for her to be mindful of her audience and to do better.

and also book 3 sucks xoxo

[spacecadet-ticklesinspace]

Family Time

Summary: During a rainy day, Otto and the Peters spend some time together ❤️

(This was an older idea that I've been dying to finish ❤️ In love with fluffy Octodad 😭 hope you enjoy ❤️)

Otto listened as the rain pounded outside. This storm had rolled in out of nowhere and soaked the entire town of New York City. It wasn't bad for Otto, just meant he spent more time under his electric blanket, but it was hard for three certain Spiderman who had to spend their patrol in sopping wet suits.

When they had tumbled back into Otto's lab, all three were shivering messes. The older scientist and four worried actuators had ushered the boys through the door to his apartment to change and warm up.

Now Otto was perched on his chair finishing another project when his actuators alerted him there was another person in his lab. "Hello little Peter."

Peter 1 giggled as he stepped closer. "Hihi Ottoho!"

The older scientist turned to the youngest. He was dressed in a pair of warm sweats and thick socks. Otto set aside his tools. "Warmer now Pete?"

One nodded and rocked back and forth on his feet.

The older scientist raised an eyebrow. "What's got you all bubbly?"

"Nohothing."

Otto narrowed his eyes at the youngest. "Oho really? Then where ahare your other partners in crime?"

The youngest Peter giggled nervously. "Ihi dohon't knohow."

Flo, Moe, Harry, Larry? Keep a look out.

Yes Father.

Otto then leaned closer to Peter 1. "Your actions sahay otherwise."

One squeaked and turtled into his shoulders.

"Ohh. So you doho know something."

Peter 1 grinned nervously. "Noho!"

Father! There's two figures crawling in the back of the lab.

Bingo!

Otto reached forward and pulled Peter 1 into his lap. The older scientist turned his chair in the direction the four actuators had told him. "I know you two are back there."

Peter 1's nervous giggles picked up. "Noho theheyre nohot!"

To your right Father.

Otto wrapped his arms around the youngest and turned his chair slightly to the right. "Come on out you two troublemakers."

They're going farther right father!

Otto turned his chair farther as he wiggled his fingers toward the youngest. "If you two don't come out, I have no choice but to get your brother."

One's eyes widened as he eyed Otto's hand. "Oh no."

Otto smiled. "If you give them up, I'll let you go."

With a grin, Peter 1 shook his head.

"Suhuit yohourself."

Behind you Father!

Otto turned.

In front of you Father!

Otto turned again.

Behind!

No in front!

They've split up. Track them.

While the actuators kept track of the two Peters, Otto rested his fingers on Peter 1 side. "You two have 10 seconds before I tickle him to bits!"

"Eep!"

The older scientist drummed his fingers in place. "10 . . . 9 . . . 8 . . . 7 . . . 6."

Both actuators started to move up toward the ceiling.

"5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . 2 . . ."

"One!"

Flo and Harry wrapped around two figures as they dropped from the ceiling.

Otto grinned at the older two Peters. "Well well well, whahat do wehe have here?"

"Dang it doc! Sometimes your actuators can be a pain in the but!" Three teased.

"They've been a pain in my backside long enough for me to know that."

One of the actuators whined.

"You know I love you all Moe. I really do."

The grumbling actuator rested it's "head" on Otto's shoulder.

The youngest Peter giggled and squirmed in Otto's hold.

Otto sighed playfully. "I guess I could let you go, but do I really want to?"

Peter 1 gave his best puppy dog eyes.

"You haven't asked me to yet?"

A blush spread across Peter 1's cheeks.

"Tickle him Otto!"

"Yeheah doc! He's too cute!"

One glared at his brothers. "Hey!"

"Alright you two. That's enough." The actuators plopped both older brothers in his lap on either side of Peter 1.

Once he had all three, the older scientist wrapped his arms around the trio.

"What ahare yoho doing Otto?" Two asked.

"Can't I just give you all a hug?"

Three turtled into his shoulders. "Nohot wihitout some alterior motihive!"

Otto wiggled his finger into the tallest Spiderman's side. "Whatever could you mean Peter?"

"Eep!" Three grabbed Otto's wrist. "Otto!"

The smile on Otto's face grew as he wiggled a finger into Peter 2's side. "I can't believe how jittery your brother ihis today."

Two broke into airy giggles. "Nononono!"

The older man looked down at Peter 1. "Both of them are jittery todahay."

The youngest nodded. "Ihi knohow!"

A hand on each side of One squeezed his sides and two voices simultaneously exclaimed, "Shut up!"

The youngest threw himself back in surprise, taking some of the wind out of Otto in the process.

"Oof! Hey!" The older scientist squeezed both of the older boys' sides. "Wahatch it!"

All three Peters were now blushing, giggling messes in Otto's hold.

Can we have a turn Father?

You four want a turn tickling them?

Yes please!

The older scientist chuckled. "Go right ahead."

The four actuators squealed in joy before zooming forward to claim one of the Peters. All three boys eyed the actuators as they circled around.

Peter 2's eyes widened when he caught on. "Call thehem off!"

Before the other three could comment, all four actuators descended. A collective squeal echoed in the lab followed by loud booming laughter.

Meanwhile, Otto chuckled at the delight from the boys and from the actuators. The warm laughter inside counter acted the cold rainstorm outside. The three Peters looked so young and carefree as they cackled from the ticklish affection.

Look Father! This one sounds like a mouse!

And this one sounds like a pig!

Mine's cuter!

No mine!

A chuckle slipped out. "Whahat aham I going to do wihith you all?"

Once the boys' laughter started turning breathless, Otto called off four whining actuators.

"You can't tickle them forever. Besides, it's bedtime."

Now the boys began to whine.

"Now now, none of that."

Peter 2 turned to Otto. "Do wehe have to go to sleep?"

"Yes." Otto motioned to Peter 2's eyes. "I can see the tiredness from here."

Three sets of puppy eyes trained on the older scientist.

"No, you're not pulling that one on me." Otto loosened his grip. "Now off to bed, all of you."

After a few more playful groans, each Peter gave Otto a hug before chasing each other out of the lab to bed.

"I better not hear you three playing around in there!" The older scientist teased.

Otto turned back to his desk with the sound of laughter ringing in his ears.

A head peeped back in. "Are you coming too Otto?"

"I'll be there soon my boy. I just need to finish some work first."

The smile Peter 1 gave didn't reach his eyes. "Oh, okay. Good night."

A pang of guilt cracked Otto's heart.

We could go too Father.

I don't know Larry?

All four actuators turned to the older scientist. Please?

Otto eyed the pile of work on his desk with some hesitantion. He knew this needed to get done, but did he really want to right now?

"Well . . . I guess we can finish this up tomorrow."

The four actuators let another high-pitched squeal and began to gently pull him toward the door.

The older scientist chuckled before clicking off his desk lamp and making his way to the apartment.

[stardust-static]

I just planned a romantic ass date for me and my husband. I'm excited! I saw this ad for a drone show. I've always wanted to see one since they've become a thing, and this one looks so pretty! They're going to be making pretty shapes in the sky over a candlelit orchestra, and I was like "that's so sweet and romantic, but why stop there?" So then I made reservations at this Italian restaurant where they make table side pasta in a giant wheel of parmesan cheese. Bailey's favorite thing in this world is pasta. He's going to be so excited! Might even plan on spending some time at the observatory or something before that. Now that it's nice outside again I'm so ready to come out of summer hibernation and go do fun things! Our wedding anniversary is next week so I was thinking about going up to the mountains by where we got married and having a little nature walk and then going to this new restaurant that has a beautiful overlook of the forest. & Yes I am the romantical planner! Bailey works two jobs. He's just trying to survive. Plus I appreciate the hell out of him. So yeah, I am the experience planner & he pays for said experience, and enjoys himself. I told him that all I require for our anniversaries is that we go out on a date (of course) and that he gives me a single rose for every year that we've been married. I was reading about the paper, silver, gold, diamond years and all of that, and I think it's nonsense. I don't really want presents. I just want us to have a nice day together and to have a nice experience somewhere. That would make me happy. We'll see if he remembers the rose thing. I might have to give him a tentative reminder. Works been kicking his butt this week. He thought it would be a good idea to go back to work directly after vacation, and schedule himself for overtime. So he is working just one day shy of an entire week, and now I'm pretty sure he's getting this cold that's going around, and they made him shave his facial hair off, and now he looks like a whole new person. I don't think he's happy about it. So yeah... I'm gonna make damn sure he has a good anniversary. I did tell him the overtime thing right after vacation is a terrible idea, but he said he's going to get it while he can. So yeah I've just been trying to make sure he's well fed and that everything around here is all taken care of. Every year around this time Tobys allergies have been getting worse and worse. He already has to take allergy meds, but this time last year he lost all the hair around his eyes and his ears got all swollen. We had to take him to the emergency vet. It's something in the air around this time. Some kind of pollen. We can't figure it out. Only manage it. So yeah every morning he's getting Zyrtec and then he gets a different allergy med in the evening and then I give him a supplement that helps with seasonal allergies. It all helps so long as I don't let him frolic too long outside, but it really stresses me out. His newest thing is his paws. His paws are itchy now. So now I'm washing his feet at night and putting hot spot spray on them and that's helped a lot. That darn dog is so high maintenance. I'm going to have to go outside and start chopping down some plants. I'm trying to keep him out of the vet office this fall. 😩

[the-firebird69]

and there are signs. this man and son here are out. need out. well are not out fully and have a number but dont seem to see it. w e use it now need them out. fully. we know why yes are not useful. and a new crew needs in these are spent the psuedo empire too. right. he will be alone for a time. and they will wonder why. and the out.

--- We have seen some size that they are going to get the carriage together or vehicle for our son a big one is Tommy F saying he's going to get it down here while Trump is out and give it to him while Trump is out and have lily do it and not that it's any of your business but it's our sons car he's earned it and he ordered it to take place and he says his car is one before that one and it's true he's got the prototype which might not work that great and father and mother actually it's reversed they say and it says good that's the way it should be it's more honored to have the prototype which is not used and they're the ones who made it so it accepts and we get that and they were not asking but he says it is appropriate and it is in this case so wow that's actually good and also is an agreement between peoples and it's helpful. And they'll try and yell and scream about it as will the mac proper at the right time. And yes Tommy F is one sign and he plans to do it well trump is in office and yeah that's next year let's play the ways away now he's saying earlier than that september 22nd or so and he agrees it will be earlier

-another sign And it's rather rude are the baby carriages you bought at Fishers Village and they do sell a few a day it's actually getting bigger and there's a website and a lot of people are buying them and it's because these kids shrink and expand and they want to be seen as regular people when they move so they have a job finally they feel better about it and they think our son was funny and they say his muscles are huge big enough and he says not from the outside and it's true they say it looks a little smaller. So he moves his bicep in front of Emily's face like in the Transformers Camaro that puts it right in her face almost touching. And she was disgusted

- There's another side and it's John Remillard himself saying if he has my car i'll be mad but he doesn't wanna do it himself.

- Another clue is this place is going to rip apart and people might want to get him a car after the glades settle and to try and have him keep the bridge opened. And that's what they think

- Another thing is the mac proper mention it all the time in code and then talking saying it out studying it checking on it and our son will have some money not really enough but if he has to evacuate he will and not really enough but if he has to evacuate he will and he says it. You can throw the safe in there and you can sleep in it and that's what he'll do people sleep in Walmart all the time nowadays they have libraries that are safe harbor and you can go there and park at night.

- There are other signs but the Mac proper have code and it's out other people want him in the car and pretty bad in Wednesday evacuate it will be a larger push and Tommy F2 but from for a different reason he wants to magnetize the car and our son says if you magnetize it it won't be lifted by a magnet and it says you know what I mean. Truthfully they're talking about it and they did have you walk around with dogs in the cart and they had the dogs fighting and I'll tell you what they're kind of nasty and stupid too and you people are too cause you had them do it the code is pretty rich and they've been mentioning it saying that we're taking Star Wars ships and a lot of it too. There's a couple other reasons but the timing is what he's looking for and it happened when JC and Mary were in Connecticut and Tommy F had his fight in a in Rhode Island and the Americans too withdrew in the pseudo empire withdrew in other words they were all fighting over it and they're really fighting to stop them from attacking the nuclear plant it starts flooding and they withdraw to where the nuclear plant is and Tommy F moves off and they are talking about motion vessels it is a little odd because he stops his assault on the nuclear plant. Anything because the power is cut it'll be out for awhile and the water up to Miami is not really that deep it comes in a little bit it does it's only about 300 yards take some half a day to fix and he pulls off anyways and the Pseudo Empire moves in and fixes it he's trying to attack other places in the meantime he's trying for the power plants here in North Fort Myers border of punt gorda And he is trying for other power plants in Florida is a little too late to realize they fixed it for some reason and his people live there that could be it and he has to start over again so that's what's going on with that but the timing is important it's been on TV they're showing several of these holes is not true but they're showing these pits and they're showing him putting people in them and Tommy F as people he's losing to Trump and they're going into the holes there's some other things happening these people are looked at as very evil by the planet and they're looking at these stashes and caches and they're wondering if they might have time to man up and come out completely because these idiots are just sitting there and it doesn't look like they're checking it's been all night long and they're just sitting there so they're feeling up and they're taking off and they're getting their weapons on it's about 10 to 20% but across the board even the very big ones so there's a big alarm now going out. They're gonna check and 20% is probably not good cause they can go right over their armies and then pull the rest out in a stream into society and then it's a wasted damn time they're going to have their assessments completed today.

Thor Freya

Olympus

Zues Hera

[themagicfolf]

This is now my place for venting

After someone suggested I start venting in safer place I chose tumblr because I already had an account.

And after seeing what is happening to others on the site I think they were right. So yeah.

Moved it here now will copy the stuff from twitter here for preservation before reserving my twitter for non venty things

[Nov 30th ]

Out of the blue I told my Therapist that I am Asexual. Oddly I think it surprised her more than finding out that I am trans. She said that it's good I found a label that I fill fit's and that if I find comfort in it then thats good. She asked me why I wanted to label myself Ace

I think she was surprised because I had told her about some stuff before that might make it look like I'm Allo. But that was just my confusion of why I don't really look at people in that way when everyone else did. ||//TW//|| for the next part

Like I can't imagine letting someone sticking part of themself in me. It feels like that would be a major invasion of my body. I don't know though that's just how I feel

[Dec 1st 5:29]

I'm tired. Today my sensory issues didn't flare up until I got in the car. In the car my dad was talk extremely loud on the phone and the sun shown directly in my eyes. I'm better now. I never realized how much stuffed animals help me.

[Dec 2nd 2:10]

Why is it loud this is study space I want peace to work. I've been holding my plush dog the whole time and it helped but my head still feels bad.

[Dec 2nd 4:04pm]

The best friend a girl could ask for

Always listens

Always Comforting

Huggable

and soft.

I didn't realize how much I missed plushies I feel childish or dumb but having one with me helps me to function I don't know why I'm this way but I am and I don't know how to change that

[Dec 2nd 4:12pm]

Feeling better now. It took a bit for my head to feel better but after the crowd left I felt a little better and now I feel better than then so yeah. Sorry for clogging everyone's timeline with my childish behavior. And sorry to everyone who has to listen to me complain about

sensory stuff. You all are great I'm going to get back to working on the paper now.

@

*w*/

[Dec 2nd 4:27pm]

Uughh I don't want to go home I have to though Oh well I guess it's fine

[Dec 2nd 4:40]

I'm in a car and my father is very loud on the phone Dies he not understand does he not get It My mom understands but he is so loud The phone is so loud the car is bumpy At least lights the sun isn't shining bu still God. He's so loud

[Dec 2nd 8:37pm]

I had an episode I don't know I couldn't take it Today the sounds the lights I don't even remember what triggered it I completely shut down I couldn't Speak Move Respond All I could do was rock back and fourth clutching my plushies as tight as I could and listen to my

Music and smack my head into the arm of the couch It felt like an hour + I don't know what's wrong with me why am I like this. I couldn't find my tweezers they've been gone for 3 days It's hard for me to function my mental state is declining I I keep stuttering and shaking

I don't even know what's going on in my head Today I physically couldn't attend math I skipped it. I did because my brain was already over stimulated and when I tried to go outside the cold wind blew on me and almost pushed me over

I emailed my professor about my sensory issues and why I had been leaving early. After a while my mom asked if I went to math class and I said no. She says I'm not in trouble.

I want to ask about getting assessed for ASD and other things but I'm to afraid. What if they say no and think I'm stupid what if nobody believes me and I never get assessed. I know they read this but I want to be assessed so I can understand what is happening with me better

I have Autistic traits Ticks Sound sensitivity Visual sensitivity

[Dec 2nd 9:25pm]

My mom is nice but I think she read m tweet earlier and thinks depression is a major factor. I don't know I just want to know why my head is so. well not even foggy. Shattered, warped idk My counselor said we would do a sort of unofficial assessment to try and get a better idea

[Dec 2 9:53]

Im so sorry for tweeting so much about this but this is a place I can sort of vent so here it is This is what I feel like when my senses are overwhelmed I am so so sorry for constantly venting about this recently but it genuinely helps me to let out what I've been going through

[Dec 2nd 10:03pm]

Oh yeah I got my meningitis shot yesterday so I bet that is what made today the way it was. I would have had issues regardless but the tiredness thrown on top of it all would explain my inability to cope. I still do want to see about getting assessed because I still have stuff

[Dec 3rd 1:56pm]

y brain is much better today. I can feel the relief in my brain. Sounds and lights are still an issue but I my brain isn't fractured and my sensitivities aren't as extreme. I am no longer ill from my menengitis shot Some days are better than others I guess. I still have 3 math

lessons to finish and need to finish my paper but yeah I feel better today tired and drained but better. Yesterday I remember punching my PC case the floor and some other stuff out of, rage? I wasn't angry just aggressive well I hope you all have a good day post again soon bye

[whiskyeyewanders]

First Day Solo

My buddy & his son left this morning. It was great having the help for the initial cleanup, and, I was ready to settle in here and spend some time alone. Part of the reason I wanted this place was to be on my own. I haven't been on my own since my early 20s, and that was a short period of time. I moved out at 18 and had roommates. I went to college. I got a shared apartment. I moved in with a boyfriend. I finally did get my own 2 bedroom apartment at 23, then my brother moved in. Then I became a foster mom, then I met my husband-to-be, he moved in, we bought a house, we bought another house, I got divorced. I rented out my condo, I moved in with a friend, then a boyfriend. I was worried that there was no Home Depot or Lowes in the area but I found a local supply shop that hasn't let me down yet. The same faces are there each time I walk in, and they know their stuff! It feels better spending my money at a smaller place. Everyone here is so interconnected. I'm sure that can be tough sometimes but it's a plus for me. It's a huge contrast to what I experienced on Long Island. The more I get done, the more I see what I have to do. The list grows longer and more $$ every day. I've already made some friends here and can't believe how helpful they've been. They treat me like we've been friends for decades. My neighbors are friendly and helpful, and even a neighboring dog & rooster rolled through to say hey. I quickly realized I needed to cover the ceiling in the office room. One, it would never hold heat with just the wimpy foam + a hole in the corner, and the spiders and wasps from the roof space were just too much. I got some thin plywood and after much cursing and some sore arms, installed it all and reattached the light. A good sweep and some rugs put down, and I was able to set up a temporary desk while I wait for my UBox stuff to get back. Now I can work on my big monitor and not have to keep moving it around my van every night. It's clear that I need to figure out a plan to build up my "driveway". the water has washed it out over time. I need to put in a culvert and figure a way to build over it. I don't know if I'll get that done before the winter but that, along with getting the water lines run, needs to be at the top of my list. I'm so thrilled that I'm here. I do have a few anxieties in the back of my mind, of course. Will it get too cold here before the end of Nov? (I do have a nice wood stove) Will I befriend someone that turns out to be sketchy? Will I get all the needed tasks finished before winter? What happens if something goes wrong with my (rapidly aging) beloved dog? The locals all have 3+ dogs each and they seem to exist outside. Is in-home pet care even available here? I will admit, Islay Mae is excellent company and I would be less content without her here.

[bi-bard]

Bastille Songs that Would Describe a Relationship with the Murder Husbands - Murder Husbands Preference (Hannibal)

Title: Bastille Songs that Would Describe a Relationship with the Murder Husbands

Characters: Will Graham, Hannibal Lecter

Word Count: 1,976 words

Warning(s): (Will's) mention of nightmare, mention of Hannibal, (Hannibal's) death, mention of cannibalism

Author's Note: I didn't realize how naturally Bastille's lyrics work with Hannibal. Oh, this one got DARK.

**Not intentionally written in chronological order**

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Will Graham:

The Silence

It is not enough to be dumbstruck Can you fill this silence? You must have the words in that head of yours And oh, oh can you feel the silence? I can't take it anymore 'Cause it is not enough to be dumbstruck Can you fill the silence?

"Will!"

I don't know how he had gotten out of bed without me noticing him. If the dogs hadn't started barking, I wouldn't have known. He was standing on the roof outside the second-floor window.

He looked at me with confused eyes.

"Please come back inside," I pleaded.

He looked around him. I saw his breath speeding up. I said his name again. He blinked a few times before walking over. I moved back so he could climb into the house.

I didn't speak up until he was sitting in a chair in the living room.

"What happened, Will," I asked. "What did you dream about?"

He didn't respond to me. He was clearly lost in thought.

I knelt down in front of him. "Talk to me. I want to help you, but I can't do that if I don't know what I'm up against."

He looked at me before closing his eyes.

"Will... please."

I took his hand, pressing a kiss to his knuckles.

"They've been getting worse," he muttered. I looked up to see his eyes on me. "The nightmares. They've been getting worse since the Hobbs case."

I reached up to cup the side of his face.

It was progress. It was slow progress, but progress.

And I greatly preferred that to the silence from before.

Haunt

I'll come back to haunt you Memories will taunt you And I will try to love you It's not like I'm above you

Will continuing his hunt for Hannibal broke my heart.

After all that had happened, I didn't want him anywhere near the case. He was broken, hurt, nightmares doubled. It was awful.

I didn't hear about him coming home until Hannibal was arrested.

I spent a few days avoiding him, but it was inevitable. Will had been burned into my thoughts. My own fault more than anything. I wanted to hold onto him... and my mind did. I loved him. I let him love me. And now, I couldn't get away from him.

He was packing his things when I got to his house.

He only seemed shocked to see me for a moment. I was about to try and start a conversation before he pulled me into his arms.

"I should've done better," he mumbled into the crook of my neck. "I'm sorry."

"I should've been with you," I replied, trying to blink away tears as I leaned back. "Alana... she told me about Mason. If I hadn't run-"

"Stop," he cut me off. "Please."

His hands cupped the sides of my face. I closed my eyes, reaching up to touch his hands.

"I would have dreams about you," I muttered, opening my eyes. "I could see you so clearly. I... All I wanted was you back."

"I'm here," he promised. "I'm right here."

"And you're leaving again," I glanced at the boxes behind him.

He chuckled. "Yeah... Come with me."

I grinned.

"Let's go find some cabin in the woods. A place with room for the dogs. Like you talked about."

I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his, hands moving to grab the front of his shirt. I pulled back a little bit to nod to him.

He nodded back. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," I replied. "Yeah."

He grinned, kissing me again.

"I love you," I mumbled into the kiss.

He leaned back enough to look me in the eye. "I love you too."

The Anchor

Bring me some hope By wandering into my mind Something to hold onto Morning, noon, day, or night

I smiled at the dogs running around the yard. They were chasing each other and shoving each other. Playing tug of war with some toys. They were precious.

Will sat on the front steps with me, handing me a mug.

I smiled, thanking him quietly. "Gosh, you are living my dream. Twenty dogs and no humans to take care of."

He scoffed. "Trust me, the requirements to get here aren't worth it."

I looked over, suddenly feeling really guilty. "I didn't mean to make it seem like-"

"I know, I know."

"Crap," I closed my eyes. "I feel like an ass now."

"You shouldn't," he said.

I looked at him again.

"You've been more of a support for me than almost anyone else," he shrugged. "You've become a rock for me. An anchor. Whether or not you meant to."

I hadn't meant to. I just meant to be a good friend. But I would be lying if I said that he hadn't become more than that in my eyes. He was everything in my eyes.

I didn't say any of that in that moment. No, in that moment, I just smiled.

I barely registered Will leaning in before his lips touched mine. He seemed so hesitant. Like he truly thought that after all this time, I would push him away.

I didn't.

I slowly kissed him back, savoring the feeling of his lips on mine. It was almost innocent. Soft and slow and innocent.

A small chuckle slipped from Will's mouth as he pulled away.

"What," I asked, chuckling back him.

"I just... I never thought I'd get to do that," he muttered. "With you, specifically. Not in general."

I laughed again. "Trust me, you can do that any time you want."

"Is that so," he asked, almost sarcastically.

I hummed and nodded before leaning over to kiss him again.

It was perfect.

Hannibal Lecter:

Poet

Your body lies upon the sheets Of paper and words so sweet I can't say the words So I wrote you into my verse

--Third Person P.O.V--

"What's this?"

Hannibal almost froze when he saw the book Will was holding. He took a deep breath and walked over.

"It looks handwritten," Will added when Hannibal didn't immediately answer.

"It is," Hannibal tried to politely take the book away. "An old friend."

Will raised an eyebrow at the doctor.

"(Y/n)," he explained. "Loving, intelligent, passionate. I loved every part of them. I would like to believe that they loved every part of me."

"'Loved?'"

Hannibal grinned. Will was always one to catch the small details. Like the use of past tense.

"They passed," Hannibal's eyes were sad. "Years ago now. This was my dedication to them."

"Sealing them into history."

"They will live on even after my final thought," he ran his hand along the page. "I'm honoring them."

"It's kind."

"I hope so."

Hannibal couldn't bring (Y/n) into his world when they were alive. But he would be damned if he would let them go now that they were gone.

Overjoyed

Oh I feel overjoyed When you listen to my words I see them sinking in Oh I see them crawling underneath your skin

Hannibal and I told each other almost everything.

We were nothing short of best friends.

Almost every secret. Every story. Every piece of our minds. It was shared knowledge. He could recite my favorite stories. I could list his favorite paintings.

I had invited him over for tea one night.

I had a particularly long day. All I wanted was to spend time with Hannibal. No pressure from the outside world.

"How are you feeling," he asked as he hugged me.

"Tired," I mumbled, stepping back. "How are you?"

"Something tells me that I've been better than you," he replied. "Go. Sit. I'll cook."

"No, no," I shook my head. "I'm not going to make you cook after I invited you over."

We continued talking after that. We had tea and talked. It felt like his words infiltrated every part of my mind. I could see them scrawled in my brain like they were written in a diary. A book of his thoughts.

"You're staring, my dear," he said after a pause in our conversation.

I looked down nervously, shaking my head. "I am not staring."

"I don't believe you," he replied.

I looked back at him to see that he had stepped closer to me.

"Is it my fault that I find what you have to say incredibly interesting," I asked.

He grinned to himself, looking down for a moment before continuing to move closer to me.

"Hannibal," I said softly when he was close enough for me to feel his breath on my skin.

His lips softly touched the corner of my lips.

I took a breath before turning my head just enough to press a proper kiss to his lips. I leaned in closer to him. If his words had infiltrated every part of my mind, his kiss infiltrated every part of my heart. So careful, so kind.

I knew the feeling would be burned in my memory for the rest of my life.

I could picture having this moment every night. Being loved every night.

I should never have assumed that it would be a long one.

Blame

Fall upon your knees, Sing, "This is my body and soul here." Crawl and beg, and plead, Sing, "You've got the power and control." Don't pin it all on me

I did everything in my power to keep the real reason I was there from Hannibal.

It worked well until he mentioned dinner.

"Who is it," I asked bluntly.

He paused. "What do you mean?"

"Who did you kill for the meal," I rephrased the question.

He forced a chuckle. I pulled out the gun I had brought and pointed it at him.

"(Y/n)-"

"I wanna hear you say," I stopped him. "I want you to admit to what you did. Tell me what you did with those bodies."

"Put down the gun-"

"Tell me!"

He paused when I yelled at him. He was finally realizing that I had control here.

"I made meals with them."

"And how many did you feed me?"

"I don't have a number."

"But it's been a lot."

He nodded. I felt ready to vomit. Some misguided attempt to rid myself of what had been given to me. I took a deep breath.

"You are not a killer."

"I know," I admitted, blinking away tears.

"Put the gun down-"

"Kill me."

I held the gun out to him.

"Why would you ask me to do that," Hannibal stared at the gun for a moment before looking at me.

"Because I'm too much of a coward to do it myself," I said. "And I will no longer let you turn me into a monster like you."

"(Y/n)-"

"Stop it, Hannibal!"

He froze when I yelled at him.

"I loved you," I snapped. "And you didn't even love me enough to be honest with me. I deserved that choice! You stole that from me! You... You tricked me! Turned me into... this! I can't get rid of it! There are claws digging at my soul and I didn't get a chance to fight them off!"

"Would you have ever accepted me as I was?"

"Does the chance of that permit you to take away my choice?"

He closed his eyes and looked down.

"You took away my choice before, you will not take it away now. I get to control this part. You owe me that."

"I won't do this-"

"Stop acting like you care for me. If you did, we'd never have ended up here."

I pushed the gun towards him again. Hannibal slowly took it from my hand.

"In all this time, I never imagined me being the cause of your death."

"I was dead the first time you fed me whatever bastard you killed, Hannibal."

I only heard two more words before the world around me went dark.

"I'm sorry."

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Author's Note: This felt really short.

Also, yeah, has someone done a Will X Hannibal edit to "Blame"? I think it would work really well.

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