#they're victims of their imaturity and circunstamces

[nanakah]

hot take: life's difficult for tsunderes (the long version)

Behold, here is the long version of my "life's hard when you're both tsundere" Ishimiko posts.

So I've been talking it over with a friend (*waves at @miko-ishi *) and we concluded, given Aka's old interviews and the lack of an OVERLY TALKATIVE narrator for the Ishimiko side of the story, that it's very likely if there are ever complaints about the pairing's pacing or its existence in general, Aka could simply go "read again lol".

That said...

Today's hot take is: Ishigami and Miko are both spiteful tsunderes. HOWEVER the suble catch is - Ishigami was actually receptive to being nicer to Miko at first when she joins the stuco, then discreetly begun to retaliate her micro-agressions when his attempts at being kind to her backfired.

TL;DR: You both have wanted the same thing, you know...

I didn't notice it the first time I read the manga and honestly believed Miko's words during Christmas to be true and thought "yeah, surely if he had been nicer you'd have reciprocated too". Then the more I re-read it, the more I realized that wasn't quite the case.

Bottom line is, both are dumbasses.

(lots of fun rambling ahead)

IMO The last straw for Ishigami was Miko not being able to say a single good thing about him during the Operation Friendship game (chapter 103) when asked about it.

He was actually vulnerable there/being patient with her attacks up until that chapter and admitted to having observed her when asked by Osaragi (Saying Miko's serious, smart, honest), but then she publicy berates him once again (and not because she COULDN'T think of a compliment - think about it, she had his cooking not even 10 chapters prior. She was just so socially stunted she couldn't realize how much it would have been good for her there to let go of her pride, shame and grudges to seriously let him know how much she wished they could be like they used to in middle school again and that she's always believed his potential. )

And then we know what happens next. The very first swallow's cowrie chapter. They still are always around each other after that, but now unfortunately for Miko, Ishigami is attempting to move on by redirecting all the love he's dying to shower someone to senpai. Just as she was beginning to warm up to him, which culminates at the Culture Festival after he "confesses" to Tsubame and accidentaly draws her close attention on him for the following 3 months. WONDERFUL.

Their strenght AND their downfall is communication. Because they have no filter and understand the other very well they can make huge leaps in being closer (they have no sense of boundaries, to outsiders it surely often seems like they're more than just friends) through that "honesty", but that ALSO means they're not honest enough on the positive and vulnerable side of their feelings.

Some of their apparent "honesty" is actually just unfiltered anger or frustration. Being honest or truthful doesn't always mean saying everything in your mind. It's natural and human to have selfish or mean thoughts you shouldn't voice to a loved one.

Take their dance argument as an example of two tsundere's being stubborn in motion and making a problem harder than it should.

They aren't actually being that petty or either of them are wrong! They're just approaching it the wrong way! Looking for "right" and "wrong" in an argument for relationships is the wrong thing to do, it should be about reaching a compromise. Consider what is likely REALLY going on in their minds:

Miko's mind, probably: I dressed up just for you and was looking forward to seeing you look handsome! I know for sure you thought your previous crush was incredibly beautiful, but I'm insecure if I can live up to your likes and expectations! I have even worn my hair down and a more form fitting dress than I usually ever do! You dressed up even for the Christmas party! Don't you care about me or looking good for me? How come you invited me but put no effort? Do you not want to be here? You are SUPPOSED to dress up in a place like this!

Ishigami's mind, probably: I looked up the dress code because I CARE about being here and didn't want to embarass YOU or make a fool of myself by overdressing! What if I accidentally made a fool of you by showing overly dressed up and nice and you didn't? It's just a social dance event and not prom or a wedding. I had no idea you'd actually go out of your way to look pretty for me because I'm just some loser who invited you last minute and up to this point you never seemed like you'd put effort for me in particular. I thought you hated my guts for real 5 chapters ago. I couldn't even show up to this party out of embarassment and social anxiety last year. I'm scared of messing up with you because I care for you and it took a lot of guts to even show up in public by your side because YOU are actually pretty/accomplished academically and I've been an outcast loser all this time. I can't make it that obvious I'm lowering my guard to you.

Think I'm exaggerating or this is all headcanon? It's not hard to provide reasonable backup to any of the things I extrapolated about them.

And the only real problem there? Both were too distracted in their heads by "tee hee I got the invite" and never discussed the details. A single "Are you dressing formaly for it?", "Yes", "Cool, so will I" would have avoided it. But that's the thing Aka is showing, some mind games are good and fun and necessary for a relationship, but communication is key.

They're still learning to express their sweeter and more vunerable side ("DERE") to each other. It's particularly hard for them because they have both been VERY wounded from being sweet and vulnerable, both by each other and by other people.

Being openly sweet means rejection hurts tenfold, so they're extremely cautious about being too understanding, too caring, speaking their mind, etc, because IN THAT CASE, not having your expectations met means hurting.

Considering the moment they start being closer again in high school, at the stuco, is Miko at fault for Ishigami becoming more agressive towards her? She is, actually LOL.

Does that mean I'm saying it's all on that Miko their relationship soured? Of course not. Ishigami handled their last meeting before his suspension badly and neither side ever apologized for it.

There's also the fact Ishigami is KNOWN FROM HIS INTRODUCTION to often be bad at delivering the proper tone for his advices/comments and being often as preachy as Miko. He is well meaning, but he accidentaly sounds condescending to her, which makes her even more defensive:

If he also weren't so silly/spiteful/delusional about wanting no reward and just admited to caring about her a lot ("hey your earbuds' sound was leaking and I didn't want you to be embarassed by me or others. Sorry I failed." would have sufficed. BUT NOPE. BE ANGRY ALL BY YOURSELF THAT SHE DOESN'T APPRECIATE YOU FOR YOUR ~SECRET~ ACTS OF HELP AND BENEVOLENCE AND/ WORD IT THE WORST WAY POSSIBLE BECAUSE YOU'RE SEETHING) things would have been much, much easier.

That fundamental misunderstanding is the reason the "I wish you were nice to me like you are to Tsubame" scene exists.

Miko has no idea he was being jealous/overprotective of her out of a repressed/badly manifested affection. She doesn't know just how stupidly awkward he can be voicing his opinions. She honestly thinks he was being condescending to her, while in his own way, he WAS trying to actively get closer to her and shower her with attention.

Miko was agressive to Ishigami upon joining the stuco as a defense mechanism. Both have been misunderstanding each other's best intentions.

Ishigami had been incredibly rude to her the last time she tried reaching out to him at the LOWEST TIME OF HER LIFE (remember how she says the Sutera SAVED her), and up until that point it's implied their interactions in high school weren't super friendly either (it was the cop and criminal act and her calling him a delinquent even, and time will tell whether he was doing that in purpose to keep her talking to him IN ANY SORT OF WAY AT ALL instead of indifference if Aka ever graces us with another flashback)

So yes, it's interesting that the dance lampshaded how they still are fighting over smaller issues. They're working it out, otherwise having them discuss their DEEP ROOTED TRAUMA would be too much of a leap writing-wise. And I do expect them to bicker forever - but just get better and better at solving their problems in meaningful ways over time.

Their relationship got as damaged as it did because both dumb tsunderes were too immature at first to admit to their faces how deeply they have cared for each other and actually put effort into it to this day.

If they had supported/believed in each other OPENLY from the start and apologized for the note they left off on middle school, they'd have reached an understanding far earlier. They STILL haven't talked it over as of like RIGHT NOW (ch 240+)

Tsubame was the much needed element of chaos that changed the status quo between them, because then Ishigami had an outlet for his positive feelings and could deal with Miko's small "rejections" better, meanwhile Miko kept getting mostly the spiteful side of his feelings for her.

If they couldn't grow by themselves, Tsubame was indeed the needed third element to challenge their previous certainties and develop the best of them. Her role in the story is largely transformative for Ishigami and Miko, Aka never dwells too long on her aspirations or thoughts as a character. She is a plot device, but I promise I say this in a kind and not derogatory tone - she is a nicely fleshed out one.

( it's always entertaining to remember Maki could smell the triangle shenanigans and the stench of unhappy tsunderes from miles)

It's obvious senpai's influence helps Ishigami go down the road of self improvement and care even when it's not all about "earning the girl" anymore (post rejection he handled it surprisingly well and found out he can ENJOY taking care of himself). But I don't think we acknowledge enough she was a positive influence on Miko, too. A lesser discussed detail is that Miko's line picture has always been that of a small bird and te keychain that ends in her hands via Ishigami at the CF was originally from Tsubame. They have a link between them, and Tsubame even when jealous or worried about Miko as competition, never mistreats her and is always kind.

Their love triangle is one of the most benevolent I've seen in romance manga. Tsubame is genuinely nice to Miko and Miko, even when she's jealous or hurt or going insane from not having her feelings "returned", doesn't resort to berating or harming her. Tsubame is someone Miko can afford to learn from because she is an influential and successful leader to students in the opposite end of Miko's initial rule/justice enforcing method: kindness and support, rather than overt authority. A smile instead of a scorn.

oho, you see that left eye? AND THAT LYING BITCH SAYING HE DOESN'T HOPE FOR RETRIBUTION, JUST LIKE MIKO DOES. BUT THEY DO HOPE FOR IT, AND THAT'S WHAT GENERATES THEIR FRUSTRATION.

That's right, in an alternate universe you can solve their whole arc in two volumes or less. I'm certain Ishigami has been at the point we see him in chapter 238 for a while LOL

Sometimes we joke around Miko was the one digging her own grave for Christmas and yep, that she did. It goes both ways though - once she begins thawing CONSIDERABLY to Ishigami and getting all shoujo bubbles on him, he is getting "invested in his investment" on his shallow crush on Tsubame and steels himself for any progress with Miko.

That's likely why he's so mad when she acts suggestive while her arms broken. Notice he's never actually mad to buy her stuff or carry her things and such, no matter what he says (remember he too is a tsundere). But the minute Miko plays it up and goes "aaaaah~" or "you'll feed me won't you?" he gets super aggravated in a "god stop leading me on, I'm already putting my time and energy elsewhere now" way.

This one gets a bit lost in translation, but even his reaction in the "I love you" game around that time is very telling of his soft spot for Miko.

A curious detail is that while Chika uses "Aishiteru" for Miko to surprise her and "Suki" to Ishigami, Ishigami uses "suki" for Chika and "Aishiteru" to Miko only. And the catch here is that her response is completely nonchalant. She barely says a "like" and he still reacts in shambles. That little approval of hers gets him nearly as nervous as Chika's elaborate trick to say a "Suki".

Also, his reaction in Valentine's? Please. He's over the moon happy about her "giri"/friendship chocolate, no other chocolate made him nearly as radiant.

(they're way too cute, I just can't deal with them)

Yeah, it was never about him, really. If there is a single thing Osaragi was right about, it's Miko having bad timing.

The whole time it was about Miko being the real "impossible girl" in Ishigami's eyes.

That's why Chika asking Ishigami "What about Miko-chan?" in 206 is just a horrible misunderstanding on Miko's end. It's not like "there's no way that would happen" because of him, he thinks it's her who could never look his way...until NOW.

You almost had it the speedrun way, Miko-chan! Almost.

JUST ROMCOM THINGS.

so FROM NOW ON, whenever someone goes"BuT IsHiGaMi FeLl FOR mIkO sO sUddEnLy AFteR thE ConSole Chapter" I hope you remember my ramblings and think "nope, it's just that Miko finally raised her dere stat enough. Read the manga again with that in mind".

tl;dr: Humor aside, Miko and Ishigami have always been super compatible and would naturally have grown closer romantically anytime if they interacted for long enough, they just were hopelessly immature and victims of their circunstances.

Now to pray we have at least a minimum of 20 chapters left and at least some decent screentime in store for them. I HAVE A MIGHTY NEED FOR FLIRTY ISHIMIKO OR FOR THEM TO FIGHT WITH OVERT UST. PLEASE AKA FUEL THIS OFFICE LADY'S DREAMS