#they're a cowpoke too.....

[les4lesbushfire]

Trans + Bear + Aro Clay icons! ^_^

like or reblog if using/saving- thnx!

[lottes-little-place]

The Refreshing Commode from McKraken Industries in all seven Cluedo Woods. Seasons required!

I originally started this back January last year but never continued because of the difficult mapping. The wood does not line up perfectly but after hours of fiddling it's the best I can do and it's really only noticeable on worn (as seen in the second picture). The others are nearly perfect. And you might not even notice at all because nobody zooms in on toilets to take screenshots anyway.😁

Default options shown on the third screenshot. As usual the recolor in front replaces the one right behind it.

I've also made some plain Cluedo Colors recolors (I've done some recolors with prints on them back in 2022) and made some more recolors with flowers on them as well to match my Blue Ribbon Countertop counters/A Less Threatening Rack and Cowpoke Stove recolors from the same country set. These are all different files so you can have all 30 of them in your game if you can't choose. To make things not too confusing my new recolors have "2024" in their file names.

All the toilets have their dirty states, I just didn't feel like making more screens (they're the same as the 2022 version).

I feel really tired after working on this all day so I'm taking a little break at least for tomorrow, but the sink and mirror from the teaser will come in a few more days.

Credits: @shastakiss (textures and colors) and 0melapics (floral designs)

Download (Cluedo Woods with default option)

Download (Cluedo Colors plain version + flower version)

[lindsaylemons29]

8x05 out of context/incorrect

Feral children barking and growling

"what's sigma"

Halloween decor: Bobby- I can be your angle 😇 Chim- or yuor devil 👿

Eddie ur too babygirl to be scary

A third porno stache has hit the 118

"nice goin cowpoke"

"please dad 🥺"

"gourds can be very unpredictable"

Two bros lubing up together...

Buck tiddies buck tiddies buck tiddies I am having a normal day about this

Casually reading the swimsuit issue

🧑🏼"we finish each other's" 👨🏽"sandwiches"

Buck: Pepe Silvia

"please dad 5 more minutes on the iPad 🥺"

there is one bed 👀 and they're sleeping on the couch and the recliner 🤨

A FOURTH PORNO STACHE HAS HIT THE 911 GANG

Eddie sugar addict just like me fr

"they took pity on me, shared some of their pot" 🍃

It was not poggers, a presentation by Athena grant, no cap

[zmediaoutlet]

"Dean, this is stupid—" Sam starts, but he shuts right up when Dean grabs his head down and kisses him, and he also kisses back so clearly it ain't that stupid, is it. Grabs Dean's waist on automatic and his tongue's, yeah, hot and there, ready, even as he mumbles some crap against Dean's mouth about how there's no time and there's a job to do and, yeah, like Dean doesn't know that? But—

"You aren't ruining this for me," Dean says. Even if it's looking like there's a good chance of it. He drops down onto his bootheels and Sam raises his eyebrows with this face like Dean's the dumbest person he knows and even if that's maybe true a lot of the time it's not true this time. Dean's—almost positive. "C'mon, man. We're in the actual wild west, here. There's gonna be a posse. Are you kidding? This is the best day ever."

Dark as hell in the 1800s but there's enough moonlight that Dean can see Sam's expression complicating into some new, more elaborate version of the you're stupid face. "Dude, we have—like, no time. Cas is gonna come pick us up at noon, no matter what."

Dean tips his hat back, slides his hand down to cup the front of Sam's jeans. Grins at what he finds, especially when Sam's eyelids flicker. "We're experienced cowpokes, here. Give me ten minutes."

"Never say cowpoke in this context," Sam says. Not exactly soft, that big familiar bulge filling Dean's palm just like it always has. He glances toward the street, down through the muddy alley, sweeps his own hat off his head, holding it out and to the side almost like he's trying to hide how Dean's going for his belt, zip, permission not exactly stated aloud but Dean was being honest about the experience, he knows permission when he's got it.

God—yeah. Crisp hair and the thick root getting thicker. Dean smiles up with his tongue between his teeth and in the moonlight it's hard to tell but he bets Sam's cheeks are red.

"You're an idiot," Sam breathes. Oh, yeah. Red-faced. His chest heaving. "We get caught we're gonna get hanged, man."

Dean lifts a shoulder, crowding in closer. Sam's hand slides to his ass, squeezes. "Sheriff's busy," he says. He nudges his nose under Sam's jaw and grips his dick at the same time. "Anyway. Boy, they said you was hung—"

Burst of laughter that Sam muffles against Dean's shoulder—Dean grins, even if Sam knocks his hat askew—and Sam drops fully back against the rough-board siding, spreads his boots so Dean can crush in close. Dean opens up his own jeans, quick, kissing Sam's jaw and picturing it—when they're back in the world with modern plumbing and beds and whiskey that doesn't taste like the ass-end of a Ford Pinto—getting Sam into the clothes Dean bought and getting that hat back on his head and really getting his share of schnitzengruben—but god, it's fun now too, in the mud with their boots knocking together and Sam's hand plunging in to grip him whole-handed, hot. Goddamn, cowboy.

"They was right," Sam says, quiet, and only Dean could hear but he laughs too, sniggering up against Sam's throat. Okay, so this is stupid, but Sam's hand is on his dick and they've got—less than ten minutes. Dean braces his boots better in the mud and slides his hand up under Sam's shirt, feels the hair on his belly. His gut warm and knowing the world's teetering in the balance but when isn't it, damn. He gets ten minutes, goofing around with his brother.

"First one to shoot owes the other a sarsaparilla," Dean says, and Sam groans and crams his hat back on his own head, says, "Shut up," but he grips Dean by the neck and kisses him and grips Dean by the nuts and then drags his fingers up the root and tugs up the shaft and slides his thumb sweet, sweet, right there, where it counts—okay, so maybe Dean spoke too soon about the sarsaparilla.

(Later—much later—at a motel after they clear out of Bobby's house and  Cas is sent on his way and Dean's not looking forward, at all, to stripping out of his awesome sheriff's outfit, and thinking about whether he could keep it at the storage locker in Black Rock without Sam somehow finding out—Sam says, you're the worst, and Dean says why this time, hardly paying attention, and Sam says, you got any idea how awful it is to ride a horse with your shorts all caked in jizz? and then, while Dean's bent over whooping with laughter, Sam stripping miserably out of his jeans, Sam says, you still owe me that sarsaparilla, and Dean has to sit on the floor, shoulders shaking, before he says, yeah, Sammy, eyes streaming, yeah, I'll get right on that, and Sam says you better but when Dean wipes his face he sees that Sam's looking at him that way Sam sometimes does when things are good, so. Dean was right, wasn't he. Best day ever.)

[thehauntedinfirmary]

Cowboys are frequently secretly fond of each other Say, what do you think all them saddles and boots was about? And there's many a cowboy who don't understand the way that he feels for his brother

Cowboys and romance go together like saddles and bridles. We hope you giddy up to enjoy these under a big prairie sky (or in the comfort of your favourite reading spot)

𐚁 𐚁 𐚁 𐚁 𐚁 𐚁 𐚁

red wine supernova - bergoose | 10k, Not Rated

A wave of dizziness hit her, and it was then that Shane knew something was really wrong. Her body ached, her legs weren’t responding, and she was suddenly aware of a stinging sensation on the back of her neck. Did she get scratched by a bat?

She brought a shaky, uncoordinated hand to the back of her neck. When she pulled it back, it was wet, a liquid too thick and sticky to be sweat. It was too dark, and her vision was swimming but Shane had a feeling she knew what coated her fingers.

Before she could call out Ryan’s name uselessly, her eyes fluttered shut.

Down to Brass Tacks - sequence_fairy | 7k, E

What's a pair of cowpokes who've got a jackpot to spend between them to do other than spend it on the local tavern girl they're both passing fond of?

Whispers in the Sagebrush - ÉcrivainFantôme (EcrivainFantome) | WIP, 11k, E

“Something’s eating the sheep,” Lizzie says, before her horse comes to a full stop before Ryan and the gang.

Ryan feels a shiver down the back of his spine. Of course the sheep would go missing by the river. Of course it would be by the laughing woods - the copse of wild trees and sagebrush that whisper in the night.

This has trouble written all over it.

𐚁 𐚁 𐚁 𐚁 𐚁 𐚁 𐚁

Want to learn more about The Haunted Infirmary? Check out our pinned post!

[rstarsims3]

TS4 to TS3 Cowpoke Dance (Horse Ranch) Animations Conversion

CHILD Version

!! Original Animations by EA !!!

Music: Salt Creek - Nat Keefe & Hot Buttered Rum

Details:

includes 5 animation clips ;

These animations have been fixed to avoid sinking into floors;

Adult versions here;

Animation Player required to play these animations.

if the animations look like they're running too fast (though they're the same as the TS4 originals); use the cheat "slowmotionviz (1-8)" to set a speed you're comfortable with. 

I slowmotionviz-ed them for this video by 2.

Tools and Programs used:

S4Studio;

Blender;

S3PE

AVS Video Editor.

--------------------------------------------

DOWNLOAD: MF / SFS / Patreon

--------------------------------------------

TOU 🔊 Do not re-upload my creations. Do not claim as your own. Do not put them anywhere up for download and don’t add adfly to my links.  

[swagtastic-bougie-pompadour]

Howdy cowpokes!

Are you sick of weak cactus? Do you wish you could have cactus in Siberian winter, or even a nuclear winter?

Then you're in luck little doggy. Our cactus are made in special soil with the best humane growth vitamins, so they have the sharpest... how you say- uh- teeth!

These cactus practically takes care of themselves, it's almost like a little man is living inside.

But do not look inside for little man.

Never look inside for little man.

We have all grades too! Our cactus are perfect for weddings, birthdays, funerals, themeparks, funerals, and more.

So mosey on down to Cowboy Ivan Cactus Patch! Come pick a cactus before they pick you.

Well howdy to you too! I appreciate your "rooting tooting" attitude, but I do have a clarifying question: what the heck is a Siberia?

If you're looking for any more living cacti, you could always come down to Paldea too! We've got Cacnea and Cacturne, and they're great companions, even though they've got a habit of staring you down and waiting for you to show your weak point!

I'll keep you in mind if we should ever need any... graduation cacti, though. Thank you for your inquiry!

[manifcst]

@kanabiveil

WHEN THE FIRST TRACES OF NIGHT start to leave the sky, Jedediah is nowhere near close enough to shelter and he knows it.

If you had asked him just few days ago to describe the museum he might've chose the word prison. It was home, too, sure it was; a home he couldn't ever leave, though. The place was plenty big enough for him but there was always something stifling, something claustrophobic about knowing that your entire existence was meant to be spent under just one roof. Unlike many of his counterparts Jedediah holds no memories of a life before awakening, no memory of seeing the stars for himself, and doggonnit, he'd wanted to.

It's only now, snatched away from the place, that he starts to wonder if maybe his judgment towards it was a little undeserving. It's a harsh truth to realize that the fresh air and open space and stars come with a hefty price tag: there ain't no roof out here, nothing to keep him from crumbling to dust when the first rays of sunlight hit in the morning the way he knows they're about to. Jed can't even be sure that particular little quirk of the tablet still holds true here, but he sure as heck isn't gonna stand around to find out.

( For one, Octavius wouldn't know what to do without him. )

It's a painful thing, swallowing his pride enough to run right on up to the first stranger he sees on the street, whistling and waving his hat in a demand for attention ( he tells himself that getting caught in the sun would be more painful; it only makes him feel slightly better about the whole thing ).

"Heyo, Stretch! Yeah, you!" He waves a hand in a get down here sort of gesture, but doesn't actually wait for the other to get any closer to eye level ( he don't got time for that ). "Give a cowpoke a lift, would ya? I'm runnin' outta time down here!"

[kingsstew]

A Filling Feast Fit for A King

About Kings_Stew:

This is a side account made specifically for the pieces that I don't want my RL friends/family to see on my main. Some are kinky, although generally not explicitly sexual (mostly because I'm terrible at writing sex scenes). Some are more SFW and are put here only because they are inspired by things people in my personal life might be able to recognize. But either way they're a little too intense/revealing to risk posting on my main.

Kinks You'll Potentially See Here:

Belly Kink, Stuffing, Hiccups, Belly Inflation, Gurgles/Belly Sounds, Stomach Ache, Belly Rubs, Sickfic, Emetophilia (Vomiting), Emetophobia (Fear of Vomiting), Mpreg, Graphic Birth, A/B/O, Choking, Vore/Object Vore (oral only)

Kinks You WON'T See Here:

Inflation Other Than Bellies, Omorashi (Urine/Wetting), Scat, Eproctophilia (Farts), Bestiality, Pedophilia, Necrophilia

I am always open to prompts and suggestions, especially pertaining to whump and sickfics! At the moment RDR2 is my fandom of choice, but I'm well-versed in FF7, FF15, Supernatural, and parts of the MCU, so I may be open to writing for other fandoms too if given a good suggestion. ;)

Current Projects (All are RDR2 unless otherwise noted):

1. John/Abigail belly kink: Combine one part John Marston, two parts stew and four parts beer, and what do you get? A big tough gunslinger with a big tough bellyache, and a case of hiccups so persistent that neither he nor Abigail will be getting any sleep unless she does something about it.

2. Dark Micah/Arthur, force-feeding: Arthur makes a passing remark about Micah's beer belly in camp, so Micah decides maybe the Cowpoke needs to try one of his own on for size.

3. Charles/Arthur object vore: Arthur is a big boah with a big appetite. Luckily for him, Charles has a free afternoon and a brand new bag full of smooth, shiny treasures just waiting to fill him up.

Feel free to hit me up on my other pages too. You can find me on DeviantArt (DA) and ArchiveofOurOwn (AO3) under the following:

Kings_Stew (AO3)

KingsStew (DA)

Kings-Stew (FFNet)

[fallout-lou-begas]

I think you're doing God's work by shining attention on the less popular humanoid companions. I adore Cass and Raul, and it makes me sad how many people brush them off because they're hard to recruit or not #GayRep

The Cass Sweep was about my love for Cass above all else. Spite turned it into what it was as the tournament attracted the attention of people who don't even care about Fallout, but even if the tournament was run by someone with nothing but positive feelings for Cass, I still would have rallied for her the same way because it was about shining attention on her. I even had a whole thing written up for my predicted grand finals about why i think she is worth it and why she should genuinely earn her vote over (who I thought would be) Arcade and Nick Valentine. The Mean Old Cowpoke Solidarity between Cass and Raul was just icing on the cake, I was amazed that Raul beat both gay companions back to back lmao.

I have absolutely nothing against Arcade and Veronica to be clear, and we joke about the sweep being homophobic (straight's rights!), but it does make me glad that these characters who are less popular than Arcade and Veronica, partly because they're so much less immediately relatable, got such a genuinely appreciative push in those silly little polls. The discourse over Cass' sexuality only makes it more interesting, really, because then it's like "explicit gay representation" versus "has a weird gay thing going on," and where the tide is turning on what people are appreciating now.

Because there's something I've been noticing (especially in my own curated social circle but also larger out) where I feel like we're moving past and away from a fixation on representation as the ultimate metric of a media or artwork's value, or at least stances on this issue are becoming more polarized. I think of everyone around me watching Succession, The Sopranos, Columbo, Breaking Bad, Better Caul Saul, etc., basically just a lot of these shows that aren't really providing "representation" but are providing these incredibly deep, complex, and smart stories and characters that people can relate to and chew on in more ways than just sharing identities with the characters (especially since, for example, The Sopranos is VERY MUCH a show about gender and sexuality). Part of this is just because the state of representation-forward media is, like, paint-by-numbers YA novels made for BookTok first, cartoons made for literal children, agonizingly twee television shows, or mainstream movies too afraid to let their gay characters be more than two out of three of explicit, interesting, and authentic. For the really good shit you just have to find independent artists telling independent stories because the way media is made at a major and mainstream level, what kind of gay representation is allowed is still just really limited. Especially for queer representation, this has an overlap with how much explicit sexual content is allowed in media, because we are in a post-Everyone is Beautiful and No One is Horny world, and people are more wanting for fucking and sucking on screen, especially when your sexual identity is inseparable from who you want to fuck and/or suck.

This has gone waaaay off track from your original question, maybe. But to quote the prolific gay filmmaker Gregg Araki: “Just because a movie [or a book, or a TV show, or a character, etc.] is gay or independent doesn’t make it good. I’d rather go see fuckin’ Coneheads than go see most of them.”

[mortemoppetere]

@howdy-cowpoke from here:

[pm] Don't act like you know anything about me. I had my reasons for letting you live. I won't make that mistake again if you so much as /look/ at him wrong.

[pm] I know if you were going to kill me, you had an open shot. I know I had a stake to your 'family's' heart, and you let me drive it home. Doesn't seem like I've got a whole lot to worry about from you.

Me and Alan are good. I like him a lot more than I like you. Like him enough that I told him I'd stay off your farm, so you've got him to thank for that. But if I find out any of the rest of your merry band had anything to do with what happened in Mexico, they're dust, too. I'll give you that warning, for Alan's sake.

[tea-the-reconstructor]

hehehehehe new TTRPG just got delivered and oh my gosh it's so pretty

Eat the Reich by Rowan, Rook and Decard is genuinely one of the most stylish looking games I've seen in a hot minute, and while I've yet to have a chance to run a game, I'm obsessed with it nonetheless! The basic premise is that it's 1943, Europe is in flames during the 2nd World War, and you are all a part of a crack squadron of vampires being sent to occupied Paris to do one thing and one thing only; Drink all of Hitler's blood. There's a full list of the stuff I got and my thoughts below the cut.

It arrived in this really cool manila folder, like just look at the detail!! like this alone would be such a neat thing to have sitting on my desk just as a prop, but this is only the beginning

The book itself is nothing short of a masterpiece, and honestly the pictures do not do it justice. The title is done with a really nice glossy finish, the cover has an amazing texture along the bottom and back to give the sensation of dried blood. the inside also folds out!! that little slit in the front is a full piece of art, and it really sells the appearance of peering into a coffin. The style of the entire book is genuinely so crunchy and good and I wanna put it in my mouth-

There's also the bookmark, coin, and patches which, once again, are so stylish and feel so high quality. I've been just stimming with the coin since I got it, the patches are so bright and look so pretty, and the bookmark is just fantastic. Pretty much everything from this is something I'd genuinely wanna get tattooed on me. There is one more thing I got, arguably the most important piece from this entire set...

WE GOT PIN-UPS BABY WOOOOOOOOOO! So the game comes with six characters you can play as (there are options to make your own), and there are associated character sheets within the book, but good golly these got me blushin' up a storm so hard that they can all smell the blood in my cheeks. From left to right, top to bottom, we have: - Cosgrave, a hackney necromancer who's on the run from the undead mafia of East London, crooked, charming, and damn lucky. - Nicole, a resistance guerrilla fighter and demolitions expert. Turned by her girlfriend and packing hella heat, she wants to meet a glorious end in battle. - Iryna, the Old Money occultist and the black sheep of her clan, who provides a significant portion of the funding to F.A.N.G. - Chuck, a whole-ass-real-ass corpse eatin' cowpoke. Genuinely a sweetheart, if you can look past that bit. He's on this mission not just to survive, but to earn freedom after eating a county sherrif and half his deputy. - Astrid, an ex-fighter pilot that was bitten by something in the frozen taiga, now bearing the soul of a wild predator within her. - Flint, the half-human half-bat, all nightmare. He's a cave-dwelling hunter who may or may not talk, possibly because he's just shy. Each of the characters have their own unique traits, abilities and stuff and I wanna kiss them all so bad it's not even funny man they're all so goddamn fine I'd let them drink me dry for just a single chance to feel the sweet nip of their lips against my skin, like being granted by a mere glimpse of heaven while still on earth simply by the hand of some foul creature who has not seen the light of God in far too long for simply doing what they must to survive, just. I need help.

Anyway uh. Eat the Reich is a goddamn beautiful game, thank you Rowan, Rook and Decard for making hot nazi-killing vampires that have not paid rent within my mind despite occupying it since like August of last year.

[gunslinginnhogtyin]

( @hxzelwallflower ) 🌸

A delayed response ── his swiftness being the reason they're still alive despite her best efforts to follow order . While Butch was use to this she on the other hand couldn't quite keep up , let alone handle a firearm properly resulting in numerous incidents with him nearly getting shot .

She knew the repercussions that'd come traveling these parts , and though the cowboy did his best to keep the situation from escalating there was clearly more to it than just your average gang up . A feeling she couldn't shake well after they retreated .

It's only when he offers to help her down that the emotions kick in , stumbling against the cowpoke as her feet make contact with the gravel road . Her labored breathing coupled with streams of silver , clinging to him like her life depended on it .

Any adventure with Butch was bound to be a chaotic one; this time around, Eileen had tagged along, insisting that she could handle it… though Butch hadn’t exactly disclosed the type of danger they would be getting themselves into as it was quite normal for him to find trouble and for it to find him.

It seems the gang of fellas who had ambushed them may have known Butch, any outsider would be able to tell the matter was personal. The cowboy calls out warnings and the like to Eileen when they get a little too close to her before he steps in, putting a bullet in one of the aggressive men’s shoulders which cause him to stagger back and his accomplices to halt, recognizing that Butch meant business. For anyone who wasn’t used to seeing such a violent exchange so casually, it was no wonder Eileen had become overwhelmed. Not to mention how loud it was.

Once they retreat and find themselves somewhere safe for the time being, he’s surprised when Eileen bursts into tears upon descending his steed and she crashes into him, arms tightly wrapped around his form for security. He thought she had handled it fairly well all things considered, but clearly she had been putting on a brave face. It occurs to him that she had probably never been involved in a shoot out like that before and a pang of guilt is felt in his chest for getting her involved with some of his own dirty business.

“H-Hey now, don’t cry, Darlin! We made it out alive, didn’t we..?” The sandy blonde manages a crooked grin that seems a lot less confident after he speaks. He wasn’t great at managing his own emotions let alone someone else’s, though he does feel bad for the poor girl. He made adventure sound much more glamorous than it truly was. His arms wrap around her form, rubbing her back comfortingly as she cries at his best attempts to reassure her.

“D’awww, look at ya… ya ain’t gotta scratch on you. Yer jus’ fine.”

[howdy-cowpoke]

TIMING: Same day as 'Pony Problems' LOCATION: A Latte to Love PARTIES: Monty (@howdy-cowpoke) & Kaden (@chasseurdeloup) SUMMARY: So. Much. Gay. Panicking. CONTENT WARNINGS: THEY'RE FUCKING IDIOTS YOUR HONOR.

Now looking a lot less like he’d spent most of his day bathing and brushing an unkempt horse, Monty now sat alone in the coffee shop he and Kaden had agreed to meet at earlier that day. Well, not alone—there were other customers, though no one had asked to take the chair that sat across from him which he was thankful for. The sweater he was wearing looked a bit too much for the weather, but it was kind of chilly in here, and he ran cold, anyway. Deathly cold. 

With one sleeve pulled over his hand and pressed against the lower half of his face, he absentmindedly scrolled through his phone that sat on the table until a now-familiar, accented voice pulled him from his trance. Blinking and glancing up slowly, the deer-in-headlights expression made way for a more relaxed smile, and the zombie dropped his hand. “Hey,” he breathed, getting to his feet to face Kaden. 

Oh no. Was he supposed to… shake hands again? Hug? None of the above? An awkward panic gripped him and he let out a breathy chuckle, dark gaze darting toward the counter. “I didn’t order yet! Thought I’d… wait.”

—

At a certain point, Kaden was going to have to accept that his hair was fine and stop messing with it. Still, he wanted it to look good, not just okay. Putain, he was being stupid. It didn’t matter. He should just get in the fucking car and drive to the damn coffee shop already. He was pretty sure he was running late, anyway. Sure, Monty had said no rush but all the fucking same he didn’t want to keep him waiting. 

As he gripped the door handle to the coffee shop, anxiety gripped Kaden’s thoughts. What if he hadn’t shown up? What if he’d taken too long and he’d left? What if he’d read the situation entirely wrong and Monty was just being polite before? 

Putain de merde, he was being fucking stupid and swung the damn door open already. He scanned the tables to see if Monty was already there or if– His breath caught in his chest for a second when he spotted him across the way. There were at least several doubts assuaged; he’d shown up and he hadn’t left. Two very good signs. “Hi,” he said as he reached the table. “Mind if I sit here?” His tone was playful, confident, but as soon as Monty’s gaze met his, Kaden could feel his stomach flip again and he was pretty sure that easy confidence was going to be hard to hold onto.

Merde, what now? They were both standing, unsure of what sort of greeting was appropriate. Back home, it would be easy enough – la bise, but that sure as hell wasn’t the answer here and now. It just wasn’t a thing in the states. Instead of making the wrong move, he opted for pushing the sleeves of his shirt up to his elbows.  

Even with the clumsy and awkward intro, a smile found its way onto Kaden’s face quickly enough. “I’ve got it.” Going to the counter and placing the order would maybe give him enough time to figure out how to stop looking like an idiot. Had to be. “What do you want?” 

—

Thankful that Kaden decided to do something with his hands and spare Monty the uncertainty of touch, the zombie was even more relieved when the man asked for his order. Not for any reason other than it would allow him a few more seconds to sit back down alone and gather his bearings.

He honestly could not remember the last time he’d just… gone out like this. Gone out with the intention of meeting someone. Hell, even just going for his own coffee and time was a rarity—if he had it at the farm, why bother leaving? Jeez. Maybe all that confidence he’d suddenly found today was a fluke, and this wasn’t going to be any easier than it ever was. 

“Just the drip, whatever they’ve got. Black.” He paused. “Thanks.” After Kaden had turned to make his way up to the register, Monty collapsed back into his seat, admonishing himself for acting like a fool. You’ve killed and robbed people. Why is this so much harder? Get it together. To be fair to himself, the aforementioned crimes had always been committed with the stalwart backup that was his gang, and he’d never exactly enjoyed—no. He didn’t deserve fairness. He had no backup now, and delicate matters of friendship and of the heart had always been desperately more difficult than doing what needed doing to protect and provide for the ones he loved.

Lost in thought, Monty realized with an upset groan that he’d wasted all the time he’d had to think about conversation topics or generally ‘things to say that don’t make you sound like a freak’ instead worrying about how challenging this was going to be. Counterproductive was what you’d call that. Idiot. Kaden was coming back his way now, two cups in hand. The zombie put on an appreciative smile, giving the man a nod as he sat down across from him. “I’m… glad you came,” he started, wrapping his hands around the warm mug. “I kind of worried that I’d asked too much of you today.”

—

“Such a complicated order, not sure I’ll remember without writing it down,” he teased, but he was happy to hear that the other man didn’t do anything complicated to his coffee to the point that it barely resembled coffee at all. As he walked towards the register, he gave Monty’s shoulder a small squeeze. He didn’t question it in the moment but he would have plenty of time to question it while standing in line at the register. 

Was that too forward? Too much? Should he not have done anything? Putain, he wasn’t even sure what compelled him to do it in the first place. He could feel his palms getting sweaty. Fuck. He was in the middle of trying to dry them off on his jeans when the cashier asked for his order and he nearly jumped. This was stupid, he needed to stop acting like a goddamn idiot. He ordered two coffees and shuffled off to wait for their drinks. 

“You’d better not make another scene,” the barista said as she handed him his order, her eyes boring into him like daggers. 

“Huh?” Kaden was caught off guard. The hell was she— oh. This was A Latte to Love. This was where that girl had sat at his table and then accused him of cheating on her. And couldn’t forget the coffee thrown at him. “Right. That. Listen, it’s not what you—“

“If I have to clean up your mess again…” A burst of steam rose from the espresso maker, obscuring her face.  When she leaned forward to reveal herself, a metal stirrer was in her hand, held like a knife and Kaden was fully confident that she could brandish it like a weapon considering the look of pure detest on her face. 

“Right, yeah, uh don’t worry about it. Won’t happen again,” he said as he quickly grabbed both mugs and headed back towards the table, going as fast as he could manage without spilling the coffee. 

He practically dove into the seat after placing the mugs down. He wanted to check if she was still watching him but he was too afraid to turn and look. Monty’s voice jolted him out of his moment of paranoia. Right. Date. Maybe. Maybe not. Didn’t know. Anyway. Focus. “Of course I came.” His eyes darted right to the brown liquid in his cup, feeling a little too vulnerable already. “I mean alternative was to hang out with my cousins and watch whatever cartoon or teen movie or whatever they like,” he said, trying to downplay it all. He took a sip of his coffee before glancing back up at Monty. “Had a feeling this might be better.”

—

The squeeze to his shoulder sent a thrill through him, one that he was still shaking off by the time his new friend had returned. If Kaden had been someone he didn’t know at least a little, or someone he… liked, then he surely would have recoiled from the touch. But as it was, he managed to keep it together and not outwardly react beyond an awkward smile, even though internally? Internally he was having a gay panic.

There was some sort of exchange happening between him and the barista, though Monty couldn’t hear what was being said from this distance. All he could see were… expressions. Pretty intense ones. As the man returned looking rattled, Monty broke into a grin. “Oh, well glad to know I’ve managed to surpass such a high bar!” He didn’t sound sarcastic, and he wasn’t trying to—it must have been a bit nice, at least, to have family nearby. 

His gaze met Kaden’s, and then danced over to the barista staring holes in the back of his head. “Um… hate to ask, but what’s the deal with the niña behind the counter?” he asked, trying not to laugh and failing a little bit. “She looked… riled.”

—

“Yeah I could be watching endless videos of clips from that clock app or whatever it is. It’s stiff competition.” Kaden considered dropping the playful tone and saying something a little more earnest but the farthest he got was opening his mouth a little. Merde. He didn’t have a fucking clue what to say that didn’t sound idiotic so he brought the mug up to his lips instead and took a sip of his coffee. 

“Putain de merde.” He rubbed his palms down his face and groaned. How the fuck was he going to explain that. “Uh, right. I came here a few weeks ago and there was this girl who sat down at the table with me who I didn’t know. And some couple was in a fight and made a scene and this kid decided to try it herself I guess. So she started saying shit like I cheated on her and then threw her coffee at me.” He could feel his cheeks getting redder as he relived the moment. “All these fucking people thinking I was dating some teenager and—“ Kaden buried his face in his hands for a moment. “Embarrassing. I don’t even know that kid's name. Anyway, that barista remembered me from that and was not on my side in the matter. I sort of forgot that all happened here. I was trying to, at least.” Kaden was still afraid to turn to look at the barista but he could feel her gaze searing into his back all the same. 

—

The delight on Monty’s face was laced with sympathy, and he really did try to push that to the forefront, but god it was a funny story. “Oh no,” he gasped softly, tugging on the collar of his sweater and ducking his face down into it, trying to stifle his laughter. His eyes stayed on the man, though, watching him bury his face in his hands in embarrassment. “You poor thing. That’s mortifying. I don’t think I could ever show my face around here again if it had been me…” That wasn’t going to help. He laughed and shook his head, silently apologizing as he reached with the hand that wasn’t hiding half his face to brace it against Kaden’s arm for a moment. Just a moment though, because it immediately set off all his alarms again. 

Letting the sweater fall back to where it wanted to be, he busied himself with taking a sip of the coffee Kaden had kindly gotten for him. “Well, I can’t say that’s the explanation I expected… but I’m glad I asked,” he teased the other gently, smiling around the lip of the mug. 

—

Kaden couldn’t blame Monty for laughing a little. From the outside, it was pretty fucking ridiculous. “Yeah, I guess I was hoping that it wouldn’t stick or people would forget, I don’t fucking know.” He felt a jolt run through him when Monty’s hand gripped his arm, brief as it was. A jolt of what, he couldn’t say. He noticed the other man’s hand was cold, but it wasn’t that. It was something else. Something that made him want to reach out and– No, nope, that was stupid. He made sure to grab his mug again to make sure his hands didn’t do anything fucking idiotic in the meantime. “Really, I’m taking a risk here, assuming you’re not going to make a scene and get me banned from the place. And I feel like I should ask what you did expect but I’m not sure I want to know.”

He tapped his fingers on the handle of his mug, trying not to stare too much at the man sitting across from him. Kaden didn’t want to come off too intense or weird or anything. At least not any more than he probably had already. “So, uh, how long have you been in town? With the ranch and stuff?” 

—

Monty’s brow dipped in a faux look of offense, though his open-mouthed grin remained. “Me, make a scene? I would never. I’m just a simple country boy, no flair for the dramatic here.” He rolled his eyes but then buttoned it with a softer smile to assure Kaden it was all in good fun. “As for her, well… I don’t know, I thought maybe she was a slighted ex, or something. Friend of an ex, maybe.” It wasn’t as if he had any experience in that arena, and all his reference material was from TV and movies. Seemed like a silver screen moment, for sure.

“Oh, about…” He had to pause, looking down at his hand and counting on his fingers. “... five years? Though I didn’t have the farm up and running until late 2019. Before that I was just… figuring things out. You know.” Getting caught eating brains in the woods by a werewolf. Adjusting to having a friend. Trying to get a loan. Normal things. “A lot of the animals were bought from other New England farms that were failing after these big companies started buying everyone up. Mostly in Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont… not a lot of reach all the way up here in Maine, yet. Folks still like their local products.” Realizing he was absolutely overexplaining, Monty bit his lip. “Crap. Sorry. Too much.” 

—

Kaden tried to bite back his smile from getting too goofy. “Alright then, country boy, I’m going to hold you to it.” Still, he couldn’t hold back the laugh at the suggestion that barista was an ex. It seemed too absurd considering the circumstances. “No no no, definitely not an ex. Hell I haven’t even been with anyone since I moved to the states.” Merde. If Kaden could swallow his words to keep them from spilling out, he would. Didn’t need to fucking admit that. Just when he thought he couldn’t manage to embarrass himself anymore. 

Kaden’s forehead crinkled as the other man started apologizing for talking too much. He wasn’t sure that was possible. He was pretty sure he could listen to Monty talk about this shit all night. Which, uh, he definitely wasn’t going to tell him that part. Still, he raised his hand and waved it off before saying, “no apologies necessary. I mean we’re here to talk, right?” Actually he wasn’t completely sure now that he put it in words. “Uh, you know, get to know each other or something. I guess. I mean, especially if—” He stopped himself just short of calling this a date out loud. Yeah Monty definitely wasn’t the one who should be worried about talking too much. Kaden reached back to rub the nape of his neck. Putain, he had a feeling his cheeks were burning up again. 

He cleared his throat and took a sip of coffee before continuing. “Anyway, five years. Been a while, then. Uh, where are you from, then? Cause I’m pretty sure most people from Maine aren’t fluent in Spanish.”

—

Oh dear. This one had a habit of saying things he quickly regretted, didn’t he? Monty had learned to just say less over the years, though half of that lesson seemed to be going out the window now that he was having a private conversation with someone… well, someone like Kaden. His expression turned a bit sympathetic and he let out a chuckle, looking down into his mug. “Oye, no worries, neither have I.” Of course there was a pretty big difference between a few months and—at minimum—five years, but… it was only the tip of the iceberg, and Kaden didn’t need to see the rest. “Ah, yeah. Suppose you’re right,” he agreed when Kaden assured him he’d not been making an ass of himself by rambling. Whatever was left unsaid started up a curious train of thought in his head, and Monty nearly missed what the man was asking him next, trying to push the conversation along and forget about whatever he’d been about to say. Especially if what?

“México,” he circled back, answering the question that had come after the blunder that left the man across from him blushing. 

He was cute. Oh boy.

“Oaxaca, if you wanna get specific.” As if his strong accent wasn’t a dead giveaway. But then he supposed that folks not from a Spanish speaking country might not be able to tell the nuanced differences there. “And you, you’re… French?” He’d known some French folks, back in the 1900s. Transplants from Europe, looking for a new life in America. They’d always been kind to him. “I’ve never left North America,” he admitted, leaning into his hand as he propped it up on the table with his elbow. “That must be kind of scary, I would think. Going to a whole new place across the ocean. But brave. What brought you here, if… if you don’t mind?”

—

It wasn’t Kaden’s intention to say all that shit just to find out if Monty was single but, well, it was still nice to know that was the case. His brow raised at the answer to his question. “Funny, you’re the second person I’ve met from Mexico in the past month or so. Can’t say I expected this town to have a bunch of Mexican expats, it’s not exactly close.” Small world after all, he supposed. “But yeah, I’m from Lyon, France. It’s on the east side of the country, well south of Paris, and a few hours from Geneva.” He’d encountered enough people this side of the Atlantic who couldn’t find his country on the map let alone his hometown so he’d gotten pretty used to explaining it right off the bat. 

Kaden couldn’t keep the corners of his mouth from turning upwards when the other man called him brave. Merde, c'était un idiot. He did his best to brush it off with a small huff of disbelief. “Alright, like moving from Mexico to Maine is just a walk across the street. It’s not that different. Plus, I visited the states once or twice. A long time ago, but I had family here. Well not here. In the country but uh had never been to this part. So, I don’t know. Not scary so much as really fucking weird.” Hell, there were times where being in Wicked’s Rest still felt like he was just on some sort of extended vacation or some fucking fever dream. Somehow it hadn’t fully settled that he’d moved. That Lyon wasn’t actually home anymore.

The last question choked him. The easy, simple answer he normally spat out wasn’t the forefront of his mind. Because he wasn’t there to just visit family. He didn’t move there for a job. He wanted to keep those two simple answers in mind, but the only thing he could see in his head was the knife and the blood on the couch and the look on–

Kaden pinched his eyes shut to block it all out. When he opened them, there were big brown eyes looking back at him. Shit, he had to look insane. He tried to fake a sneeze or a cough. “Sorry,” he said, trying to will his heart rate to slow down. “Uh, yeah, I had to leave. Family bullshit. Just… needed a fresh start.” Putain. Kaden was pretty sure that was more than he’d fucking told anyone at this point aside from maybe Andy. He just hoped it wasn’t too much too soon. 

—

Monty wondered briefly if it had been Emilio, and the mere thought of the hunter set him on edge. He hoped that Kaden had at least had more luck with the man, but judging by his tone, it hadn’t been anything too out of the ordinary. Hell, it probably wasn’t Emilio at all. He was just being paranoid. “Lyon, ah, I hear it’s nice there,” the zombie agreed with a nod, faintly recalling someone telling him about a place with that name quite some time ago. 

“It was a long walk, I’ll admit…” Monty joked, shaking his head. The man’s train of thought had him laughing and shrugging in defeat, until he finally relented. “All right, all right, I take back the compliment,” he snickered. “Or maybe I’ll just say we’re both brave then, eh? Okay compromise?” It was certainly some amount of bravery that had gotten him here, after all. A month ago he’d never have dreamed of doing something like this. 

The smiles and laughter gave way to something darker, though, and the cowboy felt his heart sink like the stone it was. “No, it’s—I’m sorry. I should not have asked.” It was clearly a wound, and not an old one at that. At least Monty had the benefit of time. “Well… if it… means anything, that’s why I left México, too.” There was a beat of silence as he fought the urge to look down again. “Family… you know. Found family. Troubles. Ah—” Running a hand through his hair, he sucked in a sharp breath. Habit. “Anyway. We don’t need to get into that.” He tried to look as apologetic as he could. “For what it is worth, I’m… glad you ended up here. Glad to have met you.” It wouldn’t mean much, surely, in the face of whatever tormented him, but… hopefully it was enough to shoo away the cloud that had formed over their shared table.

—

Kaden rolled his eyes at the other man’s joke but even then he couldn’t conceal the laughter. When Monty suggested he was going to go back on his words, the hunter brought his hand to his chest, acting as if he’d caused him great pain but he could only mask the smile for so long.

The hunter waved off an apology for the second time now. “Nah, it’s a reasonable question.” Not his fault that Kaden’s life was a fucking mess. Putain de merde, maybe it was best this didn’t go anywhere after all. The thought of having to explain, god, anything about being a hunter or his sister or his family – his stomach dropped at the thought. It would have anyone running for the hills and he couldn’t blame them. Right, probably best to enjoy whatever nice moments while they lasted. 

As much as he didn’t like seeing the flash of sorrow sweep over Monty’s face, Kaden felt some faint ping of hope that maybe he wouldn’t run after all. At least, not immediately. Before he could second guess his actions, his hand reached out to the man across from him. It only made it halfway between them before Kaden clenched his fingers into a fist and awkwardly laid his hand on the table. Merde, he wasn’t sure what his actual plan was but something in him just wanted to reach out and offer some sort of– something, fuck if he knew what. Comfort? Solidarity? Empathy? Putain. “Guess there are worse places to end up,” he said, the smile finding its way back to his face. “Granted, I’m not sure how true that’d be if I hadn’t run into you,” he added, his eyes drifting towards his fingers as he traced invisible circles on the table. “Pretty sure I owe Manzanita a lot of apples for the introduction.” He looked up and locked eyes with the cowboy again; it was easier once the tone shifted. “Speaking of, I have to know; is she the most interesting way an animal’s shown up on the farm or…?” Kaden raised his brows, prompting any stories Monty might have to share. 

—

Butterflies erupted in Monty’s gut as he saw the man’s hand sliding across the table toward him, and he was equal parts relieved and disappointed when it halted, closing into a fist instead. The contradictory emotions made him annoyed with himself, and he was thankful that Kaden was speaking again, distracting him from the feeling. Glancing up, he caught the other’s gaze just in time to be terribly embarrassed yet again, one hand coming up to cover half his face as he let out a weird little laugh. He didn’t even know what to say to that—his initial reaction was to tell the other to stop, but that wouldn’t be very sincere. He liked it, so far at least, he just wasn’t good at playing it cool. 

“Uhh, no, actually,” he stammered, trying to shake away the tension in his shoulders. “There are—we have a couple of… oxen that showed up on their own and refused to leave.” Catoblepones, if he was being truthful, but that wasn’t exactly an option. “So now they’re just part of the herd.” He thought for a moment, then chuckled. “Also, a couple of my hands have won animals in card games. The dogs we have now, they came from a man who… well, let’s just say they weren’t his top priority. Chickens, too. The…” He couldn’t think of the word, instead lacing his fingers together and gesturing purposefully with them, “... crossover?—of gamblers and folks who don’t know how to properly care for their animals is a little...” The right word for how much it upset him didn’t seem to exist in his vocabulary, so he just shrugged instead. And then, thinking about what he knew of Kaden’s profession, he smiled. “I am pretty sure if I had a job like yours, the farm would instead just be a sanctuary for animals down on their luck. I have very little self control when it comes to things like that.” Manzanita was a good example—taking on another full grown horse was a big deal, especially when they already had foals on the way. But how could he turn her away?

—

Putain de merde, how was this man this fucking cute? On top of being sweet and charming, too? Hell, Kaden wasn’t sure how long he was going to be able to keep himself from saying or doing something even more idiotic than he already had. Maybe he should accept that it was inevitable. He could just cut to the chase and… No, not yet. 

“Oxen? Just wandering around Maine?” Kaden laughed and shook his head. Though he had to wonder if they were really oxen. Maybe he should take a closer look next time he was at the farm. Shit, did he just assume there would be a next time? Sure, he’d gotten an invite earlier but all the same. He was glad to table those thoughts before they spiraled out of control as soon as Monty started talking again. “Fucking people gambling with animals, disgusting.” His frustration was tempered when watching the way the other man find his words. It was hard to hold onto any anger, even for those assholes who deserved it, when watching his hands create the visual of what he was trying to say. 

“I believe it,” he said with a chuckle. It wasn’t hard to imagine Monty walking into the shelter and scooping up every single animal he could get his hands on to take them back to the farm. “Trust me, it can be hard to walk away sometimes. Especially the cases when I can’t bring the animals to the shelter.” Those cases where it was clear there was abuse or negligence going on but nothing was to the point that he could act on the situation. Those were the days that made him question the job. “It helps that I barely have space for a guinea pig let alone all the animals in the shelter. I mean, granted, guinea pigs need more space than most people think they do and fucking pet stores don’t help the situation any when they only sell those stupid–” He caught himself going off on a tangent that he really didn’t need to wander onto. “Anyway, it helps to see all the moments when an animal gets adopted and finds the right person. Like today. Doesn’t always happen but it makes all the bullshit worth it.”

—

“Something like them, anyway.” He wasn’t a great liar, but he hoped he could skate by on vagueness alone. “Maybe that’s not the right word in English.” It was as good an excuse as any. 

It was disgusting, which was why the folks he knew that were good at poker would use it as a tool to root out those types and get the animals in question in a place where they’d be better handled. No one who worked on Monty’s farm was there just for the paycheck, or even just the free brains and blood, it seemed. They all cared just as much about animal welfare as he did, and it was clear that Kaden was a kindred spirit. 

Sympathy wound its way into his expression and the zombie sighed as he listened, only able to imagine how tough it must have been to deal with those dismal situations. The upset faded as Kaden started to ramble, for lack of a better word, about guinea pigs. Of all things.

Monty pressed that sweater sleeve over his mouth again to hide his smile, but of course it reached his eyes too, so what was the point? “Well,” he started, sounding like he was barely containing a laugh, “I’m honored to have been the right person.” He closed his eyes for a moment, thinking about the mare sprinting along the fence of the paddock for perhaps the first time in her life, and his heart swelled. “She’s such a good niña. I miss her already.” Peeking at Kaden with one eye, he finally lowered his hand. “And I’m glad I got to share that with you. You are—I don’t think I’ve met someone outside of the people that work for me that care like you do. It’s… ah… refreshing. And very sweet.”

—

The cowboy lowered his hand from his face and Kaden’s own brightened at the sight of him without the fingers he was trying to hide behind in the way. Merde, he had to look so goofy. And surely he only looked goofier once Monty started complimenting him. His heart skipped a beat and he was pretty sure there were butterflies in his stomach trying desperately to escape. “I, uh…” Kaden’s eyes dropped down to his mug and he tried to find something to say to that but he couldn’t figure out what he could say that wasn’t, well, probably way too much. “Thanks. I can’t say I’ve met anyone else who cared as much outside of the shelter, either.” 

He reached up to rub the back of his neck, maybe it would distract him from letting his mouth run away with him. “Guess I’m used to my little sister making fun of me for liking animals so much.” Keira always thought it was a distraction from their duty, that he was stupid for caring so much and that animals weren’t that far off from monsters sometimes. He loved his sister but sometimes– He quickly shook off the thoughts of her. 

Still, somehow, keeping his gaze lowered for a bit was enough to build a spark of confidence. “Sweet, huh?” He looked back up at Monty, a wry smile on his face. “Funny, I was going to say the same about you.” He hoped he wasn’t betraying his bravado by blushing too much. 

—

“Mm… younger siblings can be a pain,” Monty chuckled. “I should know, I was one.” He didn’t mean to emphasize how it was no longer the case, but the blood relatives he’d left back in Mexico were so far and away from his thoughts most days that sometimes they didn’t feel much like family anymore. They were all long dead, and too much had happened since then for him to give it much thought. 

Then again, you’d think he’d be able to say the same thing about the man from his past that haunted him, but that was… different. It had stunted his self-discovery for over a century, and he still carried it very close to his heart. 

“Oh, now…” he groaned, amused in spite of his shyness. “I have been called many things, Kaden, and sweet is not one of them. Don’t start lying to me just to make a good impression.” He was joking, clearly evident in the grin that stretched across his lips, though there was a nugget of truth in the self-assessment. He’d never seen himself as a good person. Even saying he was kind was a stretch—he simply wanted to do the right thing whenever he could. It didn’t really matter what that looked like. “Stupid, that’s the one people usually go for,” he added with a breathy laugh. “Strange, maybe. But sweet?” He clicked his tongue and shook his head, feigning disappointment. “I’m just about as mean as they come, amigo.” 

—

“That so?” Kaden rested his arms flat on the table, leaning in as he continued. He noticed the use of past tense on Monty’s part but it didn’t seem like something to poke at. He figured the other man would elaborate if he wanted to. For all he knew it was just a slip of the tongue, just the wrong word choice. “Youngest or somewhere in the middle?” he asked. “I only have Keira so lucky me got to be the oldest.” With all the pressure directed squarely on his shoulders. Even now after he’d refused to carry on the family legacy, he could still feel the weight trying to crush him. He had to wonder if he could ever fully shrug it off.

“Stupid? Not sure what that makes me, then. But I’m willing to bet whoever said that should go look in the mirror if they want to see stupid.” Kaden was surprised to feel a flicker of anger at the thought of anyone calling the cowboy stupid, but it was there all the same. “Alright, now you’re just messing with me. I’m not convinced there’s a mean bone in your body.” The hunter was aware he was already rather biased but even then, he just couldn’t imagine the man sitting across from him being honest to god mean. Then again, Monty probably had no idea just how much of Kaden’s own life was wrapped in violence. It was possible the other man was in a similar situation. Even so, he couldn’t picture those brown eyes and that smile ever shifting into anything harsh or angry, as much as he tried. “Unless it’s in your pinky. Maybe. But it can’t be more than that.” 

—

“Oh, youngest. Always the baby, which was sometimes good, sometimes bad. When you have six other siblings… that’s a lot of bullying,” he laughed. “So I had to bully back.” His eldest sister had always been sweet with him, though, and he’d imprinted on her terribly. He wondered, looking back, if she’d always known he was… different. Perhaps that’s why she protected him so vehemently from the adolescent cruelty of his brothers. “Oldest is not an easy burden to bear… but I am sure you did so with honor,” Monty offered with a small smile and a shrug. 

It was fine for him to be self-deprecating, but the moment such a thing passed from Kaden’s lips, the man frowned. “Oye, don’t say that about yourself.” He recognized the hypocrisy of the statement, and huffed out something that was between a sigh and a laugh. “I was just… never educated. It is what it is.” He waved a dismissive hand as if to clear the air, knowing that it wasn’t likely to work. 

“What if I told you it was my whole right side?” he chuckled, closing his hand into a fist and doing a very slow, goofy impression of an uppercut. “I’ve laid some men out before, you know. When their… trash talk got out of hand. Or when they cheated at cards!” It was tough to imagine, but he’d not always been such a helper. Usually at the behest of Hector. He could only assume he would do the same thing today, if he ever felt that way about another person again. 

—

“Ah, it all makes sense now,” Kaden said, his eyes crinkling from all the damn smiling. “Thanks but I don’t think my family agrees with you too much.” He rolled his eyes and sighed. He couldn’t even begin to start wondering what his mother and sister were saying about him now. Not that he couldn’t imagine what they were saying, just that it would hurt too much. “Oh well, can’t do much about that.” He took another sip of his coffee, hoping to shrug it off. 

It wasn’t long before Kaden found himself rolling his eyes again. “Not educated isn’t the same as stupid. Look, I barely passed secondary school. I think they let me out of sheer pity. That or none of those teachers wanted to deal with me ever again.” The truth was, school felt like such a waste of his time. Kaden knew what he was going to be, what his life would be like, and none of it involved a need for algebra or synonyms. He was a hunter, a monster slayer, and that was that. Why waste time with homework or studying when he could be training? It’s not like he could just pretend to be normal or hold onto any delusion that his life could look any different than the plan that was laid out in front of him since the day he was born. 

“I still don’t believe you,” he said, shaking his head, his lips pulling upwards into a smile despite his efforts not to. “But fine, alright, you’ve defended yourself, sure. Not sure that makes you mean.” Kaden obviously didn’t know everything or have the full picture, but he had a feeling he was sitting across from a genuinely good person, whatever it was he might have done in the past or not. The way he was at the farm and then now– The hunter may not have had a concrete reason why he felt like that was the case but he couldn’t shake the feeling either. 

—

The man’s attempt to make Monty feel better about never having gone to school didn’t go unappreciated, drawing a soft, warm smile from him. He didn’t think Kaden seemed like the type to lie about that sort of thing just for the benefit of a near stranger, so he took it as earnest truth. And it did make some small part of him feel a little bit taller, he thought. 

“Doesn’t it? Punching people isn’t a very nice thing to do.” The zombie chuckled, shaking his head. His mind jumped to thoughts of the men he’d held at gunpoint, back in the day. The men he’d ripped from their saddles and shot, only to steal their belongings. Murder for dollars. That’s how it was, then. If you couldn’t hold down a steady job—and hell, sometimes even if you could—you’d never have enough cash to feed your people. To take them somewhere safe, somewhere far away, where you could settle. 

But sure. Punching people was the worst of his misdeeds during his time with that gang. 

As he went to take another sip of his coffee, he realized it was the last one. Mm. “I think…” he began, setting it back down on the table, “one of the things people like to ask each other when they first meet is… something about hobbies. Personal interests.” A beat. “What do you do in your free time, Kaden? If you have any. I know I barely do, so nothing is a perfectly acceptable answer.” 

—

“Alright, alright. I guess you’re right. Still, you could have done worse.” Kaden knew all about doing worse. If only punching was the worst thing he’d done. His hand absent-mindedly rubbed his opposite arm, almost as if he thought he could wipe away the harm he’d done with his own two hands. There was no taking any of that back, no giving back the lives he’d taken or filling that hole for anyone who–

He pressed his thumb into his bicep to force him out of his own damn head. Monty probably shouldn’t bother with him but he wasn’t going to tell him that. Not yet. He’d enjoy it while it lasted.

“You know, I think you’re right,” he said, brightness returning to his face as he spoke. He exhaled and gave himself a second to think. “Well first off, I don’t have a lot of free time. But I run every morning I can. I’ve been fixing up the cabin a lot, there’s all kinds of weird little quirks.” And by quirks he meant things in disrepair. “I did pickup football– I mean–” Kaden was about to clarify and call it ‘soccer’ since he so often had to now that he was in the states, but he stopped himself when he realized. “Right, guess you use the right name for it, too. Anyway, I’d do pickup games back home. I’m not very good but it’s fun,” he said with a shrug.

—

Brightening himself, Monty nodded enthusiastically. “Fútbol! Oh, I love fútbol.” It was one of the few more modern things that he’d latched on to over the years. “The hands and I all play on Sundays in one of the fields! We have terribly made goal posts and everything!” He shook his head, grinning, “Brendon made them. He is excellent with animals, but not so much with wood and nails.” The smile evolved into a laugh and Monty reached for Kaden again, this time letting his hand sit bravely atop the other’s sleeve rather than immediately pulling back. “You should come play with us some time! You will be horrified by how competitive I get.” 

Settling into a softer grin, Monty had to commend himself on the prolonged contact. Sure, there was clothing in the way, but still. It was something. “Also, if you ever need any help with those, ah… quirks, I built all the cabins on the farm. I am happy to lend a hand. Two, if I like you enough.” 

—

“Really?” Kaden said, eyes lighting up like a kid on Christmas morning. He was so distracted by the idea of a good match that he nearly missed the hand on his arm, but the moment he did, he felt that flutter in his chest that was starting to become familiar. Putain, his cheeks were going to start hurting if he kept on smiling this much. “You’re on. And in that case, I won’t even hold back.” 

There was temptation to place his own hand on top of Monty’s, but he resisted. Didn’t want to spook him. It was clear enough both of them were too awkward for their own good. “You built them? Putain, that’s impressive. I’ve worked on some construction sites but never built a whole house by myself before. Hopefully none of the quirks are anything serious but I’ll always take a skilled hand.” He leaned in a little closer over the table. “So what do I have to do to get the second one?” He raised a brow, smirking as he waited for his answer. 

—

The delight at having another person to come to the farm (and get a ball kicked so hard into their gut that they’d get laid out by it) was shadowed by, absolutely and staggeringly dwarfed by the next few things out of the man’s mouth. 

First, it was praise, which Monty always had a hard time accepting. He was just about to pipe up in protest when the man leaned in closer, shutting him up in a split second. His eyelids fluttered in a partial-blink, his thoughts flatlining, leaving him utterly empty-handed. 

Except, of course, for the forearm that was still beneath his palm. 

“Uh.” His smile couldn’t seem to decide what intensity it wanted to rest at, shifting as he tried to start speaking at least three different times, and failed. But on the fourth— “I think you… might already have it,” he admitted sheepishly, letting his gaze drop down to where his hand was touching Kaden. Dios mío. He felt faint, if that was even possible.

—

The bravado Kaden had when he’d asked his question was slowly leaking out of him with every millisecond that the other man flustered. Not that he planned to let that show on his face, but his heart was beating a mile a minute. And at his answer, it stopped all together, skipping a beat like some sort of damaged vinyl record. Any hope that he didn’t look like an idiot was out the window. As much as he wanted to keep his eyes locked on Monty’s he was a little relieved when his eyes flitted down to his hand; he might have been flying a little too close to the sun otherwise. 

Instinct kicked in and this time, the hunter didn’t second guess it, simply lifted his free hand and rested it on top of Monty’s. When he tried to speak or look back up at the other man, he realized he’d used up the last of his confidence for the time being. That was fine, right? A moment or two in silence wasn’t bad. 

Once he was able to get air back into his lungs and dared to look up, he attempted something that was close to words, though it was more like stumbling and stuttering. “Uh, so, yeah. I know we just met… But, I figured–” And it suddenly felt like the room had lost all its oxygen. “I don’t know if this was a, uh, you know… But I’d like to, um…” Merde. He wished he could blame his lack of words on the whole second language thing but that wasn’t it. It had been a long fucking time since he was this flustered around anyone. Something about Monty, it just… He was so goddamn cute, but anyone could see that; that was impossible to ignore. But there was also something else that he couldn’t quite put his finger on yet. All he knew was he didn’t want to mess shit up. And he felt just confident enough to take another risk.

“Putain, I don’t think I’ve been this nervous around someone since I was a teenager.” Kaden laughed, trying to shake off the nerves, and took a deep breath before speaking again. “Anyway. I wanted to ask if you wanted to go on a date.” Good. He managed to say one damn thing without stumbling over every fucking word, but even the hint of silence now was too much to handle. “Or, well, another one if this was– But, uh only if you want to. It doesn’t have to be that, I mean, if I got the wrong idea or if… ” The only reason he was able to stop fucking babbling was because he ran out of goddamn breath. Which was probably for the best.

—

When the other sat his hand atop Monty’s, the zombie felt certain he might slide right out his seat. It took everything he had to remain upright and not yank the collar of his sweater over his entire head. He didn’t know what to say, so he just didn’t, waiting and praying that Kaden would eventually fill the silence and spare him the panic alarms that were going off in his head. 

He hated being touched, but he also really fucking loved it. Christ.

Kaden was having just as hard a time as he was, it seemed, and it finally gave Monty the courage he needed to glance up again. The look of shock on his face slowly turned to amusement as he watched the man stumble through his thoughts, though it was still definitely laced with his own embarrassment. 

A date. Which this maybe was, maybe wasn’t, but he was asking very clearly for a date, and Monty was about ready to die his second death. “Hey,” he interjected softly when Kaden had to take a breath, stopping him from going on any more. “Yeah, I… yes. I’d—like that.” On a whim, he rested his last remaining hand over the top of Kaden’s, creating a stupid little tower of awkward touches, and laughed. “Now…” He retracted the hand again, almost shaking it out as he did so, “If it’s alright with you, I would like very much to… move. Walk. I’m going to lose it sitting here. We can just—” He gestured to the town outside the coffee shop, assuming that Kaden understood the need to dump the anxious energy that had been building up this entire time. They could continue their conversation in the sun, he figured. He hoped. 

God, it had been a long time since he’d hoped for anything.

[markodragic]

I posted 1,356 times in 2022

624 posts created (46%)

732 posts reblogged (54%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@markodragic

@new-austin

@revswanson

@blackinquisitors

@lupinus-bicolor

I tagged 1,062 of my posts in 2022

Only 22% of my posts had no tags

#güd art - 261 posts

#marko.txt - 105 posts

#self rb - 96 posts

#rdr2 - 50 posts

#yakuza - 29 posts

#vandermatthews - 26 posts

#charthur - 25 posts

#red dead redemption 2 - 24 posts

#marko tag - 23 posts

#jovier - 19 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#i’ve only played tw3 and i’ve never read any of the books so i’m sorry if one of these characters has done unspeakably bad things skgkgkhk

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

good morrow cowpokes

1,341 notes - Posted May 23, 2022

#4

so i forgot to take arthur’s bandana off before talking to alden and uh

1,479 notes - Posted January 10, 2022

#3

the cutie girl sticks in yakuza 4 are so fucking important to me because they look as if they're modded in like when you see a screencap of miku in skyrim, but no. they're just IN the vanilla game

wholly unmodded no dlc required experience

1,843 notes - Posted October 3, 2022

#2

been too long since I last posted a shit meme

1,919 notes - Posted April 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

massive shoutout to that guy who threw eggs at the king today and shouted "this country was built on the blood of slaves"

I only see 1 king in this picture

68,178 notes - Posted November 9, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[kimarisgundam]

I am literally having an existential crisis, can you guys stop yee-ing and haw-ing in the background ಠ_ಠ

My friend based Wraiths Nomad on Nico (from DMC) so he's basically like a cowboy outlaw with cybernetic implants ಠ_ಠ

Our DM thinks the cowboy accent is fun to do, so she RPs our Wraith's pack as a bunch of outlaws too

Context: Wraith was exiled from Rockerboy's mother's nomad family long ago, so our DM likes to portray his family as having the cowboy accent too cos that's where Wraith pick it up from

^ I recently got into an in-game argument with my friend and told her Rockerboy "you act like you're born in the city, but we both know you're really a hick merc" (in retaliation to him calling my Netrunner a whinny princess from a family of Arasaka lapdogs >:T )

I cannot believe her level of petty. She actually went to YouTube to learn how to do the cowboy accent just so her Rockerboy can annoy my Netrunner in-game ಠ_ಠ

Rockerboy's logic is since my Netrunner thinks he's a hick merc, he's really going to behave like one now ಠ_ಠ

He said he can "turn the accent on/off" ಠ_ಠ

He's purposely saying things like "howdy" and "cowpoke" now and it's annoying me cos do you even know what a cow is you uneducated cretin >:U

I feel like I'm in a cowboy town now cos everyone is yee hawing around me ಠ_ಠ

I feel like my Netrunner is in her own personal "hell" right now >_>...

As my Netrunner, I grew up in Westbrook. I graduated top of my class in Arasaka Academy. I used work directly under the head of Arasaka R&D (my pos bio dad actually 😑). I literally wore Jinguji

I don't know how my life has spiralled to the point where I have to hide in Dogtown while being surrounded by Raffen ಠ_ಠ

Raffen that think they're outlaws ಠ_ಠ

I am a guardian to a teen now. I don't want you guys behaving like outlaws around him! I'm trying to set the kid straight >:U