#they’re everythingggggg

[acaciapines]

in classic acacia fashion I am indeed thinking about the one (1) leo and vera mention in the new sosf <3

[raan-miir-tah]

I hate these fruit colored assholes bc now I feel like I need to cram everything into sun song how to I fit Cole being a great dad/babysitter thing into my movieverse fic

[mckinleygirl98]

the way william McKinley took such good care of Ida makes my heart melt all over the floor and bleed pink glitter

[wanderingblindly]

A) I will wait forever for the update of Oscar Piastri’s (Full Homo) Guide to Fucking Your Boyfriend (although at this rate should you consider changing the title from Boyfriend to Girlfriend 🤔) and you should absolutely take your time to make sure the final product is something you’re proud of. As the asexual anon from earlier, I’m going to stay ten toes dug into the dirt behind you At All Times, as I am with all people who tend to write with things that are potentially challenging, but especially ace people. So absolutely zero rush to you

B) There is never too much feminization for this because PLEASE LET ME MAKE MY CASE the way you write it is exploratory. They’re exploring a new ‘kink’ (don’t know what else to call it) and finding what works for them. The way you’re writing them is so trusting like “you’re giving me the end of the rope but I’m not going to pull on it” and so softtttttt. I like to imagine how safe Lando feels even while Oscar is teasing him about feminization because he knows he has nothing to be ashamed of in the face of Oscar. This leaves the floor open for the possibility that they could go deeper and deeper into exploration because they trust each other so so much and that’s beautiful to me

C) just read the snippet and man oh man, I’m pumped. everythingggggg liquid you know how to reel a person in

A) you’d THINK the title would be nearly ironic at this point, but when you consider who’s getting fucked in chapter two. Hm. Maybe it isn’t :)

From the bottom of my heart, I’m so deeply thankful for you reminding me that being happy and satisfied with my work is more important than finishing it quickly. I know a lot of fic writers — asexual or otherwise!! — feel this looming sense of expectation when it comes to getting things done, and it’s easy to get lost in it. But you’re right! And thank you!!

B) ANON YOU NEEDNT MAKE A CASE BECAUSE YOU ARE. SO RIGHT. AND ALSO YOURE IN MY HEAD!!!! I so so so wanted to convey like, the trust that’s already in their relationship — because this relationship isn’t new. Yes, the dating is new, but they were extremely close and trusting before this; that’s why Lando was so confused by how natural their fake dating felt! The trust was already there! The foundations, laid!

I also think that a lot can go unspoken because there’s this mutual ability to read one another; they’ve been observing each other for ages. Oscar can tell what’s too far, he knows how to read Lando — and vice versa n

“You’re giving me the end of the rope, but I’m not going to pull on it” is such a beautiful way of explaining that dynamic — I’m going to spin this in my fingers for ages actually.

C) oh my gossssshhhhhhh what if I blushhhhhhhhhh anon stop being so nice lol

[yikes-im-gay]

iso someone to spend all their days w me

like come to the pool and tan/drink with me, take me on a hike where we smoke the whole time, let’s go get some ice cream and watch the sunset, literally just sit on my patio with me and help keep my cats from running further than they know they’re supposed to, come pass the soccer ball with me and let me act like i’m in my soccer days again, let’s take my little brother bowling and spoil him for the day, orrr come cheer for my sports teams with me, literally just come to target and five below with me.

anythingggggg and everythingggggg

[onwriting-hrarby]

mhj at sm was something else but creative burnout got the best of her there ig? I think their new creatives are very talented but they just haven’t found their ground yet and like you were saying the focus on aesthetics over an actual concept really comes into play.

it’s easy to see in the way idols dress these days too if that makes sense? all very stylish but everyone can kinda blend together these days. like aespa drama (not the japanese idol inspired looks), baby monster sheesh, nmixx run for roses styling all looks interchangeable. groups don’t have a collective identity as much anymore.

groups like ive and nwjns have more distinction to me bc they’ll give us like one set of costumes that feel distinct each era but otherwise they’re the same wearing pretty looks but nothing that screams “we have a concept” they don’t blend in as much with the other groups mentioned but they also aren’t going for those vibes either

YOU ARE SO RIGHT WITH EVERYTHINGGGGGG ARGGG mhj was at her peak with SM, but i do believe she did an incredible job with the first NJ EP. It sounded like old kpop because it was a full concept. Now, with the new EP, I'm not so sure: I don't dig the musical style and I do believe they are viral songs, but aside of sounding very similar, I don't get the concept (although I do get the aesthetics). The girls are very talented but they don't shine in the vocals. Not because they aren't good vocalists (they are the best in HYBE) but because their tone is very similar, so if you put them with songs that made them sound very similar too you risk how they are going to receive the music. in the first EP, this worked because the girls had quite the same aesthetic (similar clothes, same hair) but for me it didn't work in the second becuase they were trying to point out their singularity while sounding the same. i don't know if it makes sense?

i do think there's a "blackpink aesthetics" nowadays. like, everyone dresses like blackpink. before, in the 3rd generation, every group dressed differently and according to the concept (the dresses in apple, by gfriend?? the horrible dresses in zimzalabim by rv??). in the 4th generation we get this kind of blackpink aesthetic becuase we have more "bad girl" groups and concepts, but it's still pretty cohesive, so i think, for example, that itzy or gidle works. but in the late generation + 5th... we'll see. even kiss of life dress a little bit the same as blackpink :'( i do think that aside from ive we should count stay c!!! they are the younger version of twice but with a punch!

(btw: can we comment on sheesh? i saw a lot of people saying that 'it sounded so differnet from blackpink' but... am i the only one that listens the same structure, same vocal tone?)

[autumnshighlady]

Officially crowning you as the Queen of poly!Rowaelin 👑❣️ I love them so much. They’re so hot.

YASSSS thank you hehe i love writing them! i don’t do it often but when i do write it i love it. i always wait for the perfect inspo for them bc i don’t wanna produce a half ass fic just for the sake of getting one out there.

y’all are gonna die when you read this next poly!rowaelin fic it’s got everythingggggg

[cyarskaren52]

I know they’re not together anymore but I love a good romantic poem

Twitter fawns over Pardi’s poem seemingly for Megan Thee Stallion

As previously reported by REVOLT, amid a high-profile court case and the controversy surrounding it, last year, Megan Thee Stallion publicly announced it was time for a break because she was “physically and emotionally” tired. After the Hot Girl Coach also removed a handful of pictures from her Instagram account, fans suspected there was trouble in paradise with the 28-year-old and her boyfriend, rapper and songwriter Pardison “Pardi” Fontaine.

While the two have kept things relatively quiet about their relationship status in recent months, this week, Pardi chose to share his feelings at an open mic night in Los Angeles. “NEVER DONE POETRY BEFORE. THOUGHT THIS WAS FITTING. THANK YOU, Da Poetry Lounge, FOR ALLOWING ME TO SHARE THIS,” he captioned a video on Instagram. “Look, you a survivor, but not a victim. Somewhere between ‘God forgive ‘em’ and ‘I gotta get ‘em,’” Pardi began in the clip that was just over two minutes long.

“You want acknowledgement for your bravery, not sympathy,” he continued while also describing the woman’s ambition. As Pardi’s words flowed, with mention of her being “spicy” and “cajun” like the Texas-based restaurant Pappadeaux, fans immediately believed his poem was about the Houston native. “I love Pardi’s poem. I’m pretty sure that was dedicated to Megan. He really tells that he sees her and he loves everything about her. That’s so cute,” one person wrote on Twitter. “Black love. I love how Pardi is with Megan! Everything about that poem was LOVE,” another said in response to his admission.

Others hoped he’d become an example for potential partners: “Just saw Pardi’s poem to Megan, and I loved every bit of it. I remember a time when men would write poetry of love and vulnerability. More of this, please.” Another got straight to the point about their dating requirements: “​​Write me a poem like Pardi or [get the f**k outta here].” While the two hitmakers may simply be living their love lives out of the public eye, Pardi seemingly squashed breakup rumors in February by sharing a photo of himself and a woman with nails similar to Thee Stallion’s holding heart-shaped shot glasses. The snap was posted around Valentine’s Day, which coincides with the “Cognac Queen’s” birthday.

See what others are saying about Pardi’s poem below!

I love Pardi poem. I’m pretty sure that was dedicated to Megan ☺️ he really tells that he sees her and he loves everything about her. That’s so cute 🥹❤️ — Nelly 🤎 (@ItsForMegan) May 8, 2023

I’m sure that Poem Pardi did was for Megan and it was Beautiful…y’all will never get me to hate that man💯 — theequeenstallion1👑Fan Account (@queen_stallion1) May 9, 2023

Pardison Fontaine shares the Valentine’s Day he planed for Megan thee Stallion. 🥺 “Pardi With A Hottie” pic.twitter.com/o9w8LXlYsD — Female Rap Room (@FemaleRapRoom) February 19, 2021

Megan Thee Stallion and Pardi taking shots for Valentine's Day via his Instagram story pic.twitter.com/l2VMtI3afE — Stallion Stats (@MegansStats) February 15, 2023

Omggggg the poem Pardi wrote for Megan is everythingggggg pic.twitter.com/5t42oZkDRu — teamstallion (@JourneeRogers1) May 10, 2023

Write me a poem like Pardi or gtfo. — S H E V Y (@Shev__y) May 10, 2023

Pardi is IN LOVE with Meg and not afraid to show it. — Akan Thee Doll, Esq. 💜🇳🇬⚖️ (@AkanButNoJeezyy) May 9, 2023

Just saw Pardi’s poem to Megan and I loved every bit of it. I remember a time when men would write poetry of love and vulnerability. More of this please — Lady Whistledown in the Hood (@colorfullstory) May 10, 2023

Black Love🖤 I love how Pardi is with Megan!  Everything about that poem was LOVE — Jasamineee👑 (@Jazzoo___) May 10, 2023

Pardi's poem to Megan is so cute and such a turn a on… that man>>> 😍❤ — Bolawa (@Bolawa19) May 9, 2023

Pardi’s poem >>>>>>>>>>>>  Omgggggg I love that fucking poem. He needs to marry Meg!!!! — Dana🐝 (@cranberryNavy) May 10, 2023

Sent from my iPhone

[ghostwoohoo]

📱 But for everyone in st

📱: Social media they use the most

(rubs my hands together) okay so considering the year the game was released, JRO would use myspace and the curious brothers would be on reddit and probably 4chan and small forum sites and that’s it. howeverrrrrrr approaching it from a modern au of sorts is more fun so let’s get into thatttttt

curious: all 3 of them are absolutely still on reddit and probably 4chan but lazlo is also on twitter and pascal is on facebook. he posts lots of pictures of tycho on his page because jenny and pol love to see him even if they’re all usually too busy to visit regularly. they’re also still on small niche forum sites and that’s how pascal met nervous, on a forum dedicated to the mysteries in the town. he also still has aol just to talk to him. vidcund loves arguing with people who are blatantly wrong on forums and subreddits, especially this one asshole who seems to be in every forum he frequents. lazlo loves using his alt to comment blatantly wrong things on forums to troll people but he seems to mostly just get angry responses from the same person… very weird…

smith: jenny and pol are Facebook Parents 1000%, johnny is probably on twitter and instagram and all that, jill is an animal jam kid i think. back in elementary school i would get home and log into animal jam and call my friend on the landline and we would play together and that’s what she does with buck after i think. (sidenote i think it’s so funny that i just graduated to discord and i still do that… the more things change the more things stay the same)

specter: okay so considering olive regularly rolls a fear of sending an email i assume she’s not on any social media but ophelia is probably on twitter and instagram (and discord) and she has to beg olive for computer time even though it literally runs windows xp…. she prefers to just sneak out to talk to her friends because the phone she saved up and bought herself (so olive couldn’t listen in to her calls on the landline) is probably also ass

beaker: i don’t see loki or circe as the type to use social media? they’re too busy being in love and evil abt it so they probably just have facebook pages they don’t use very often… loki might have a reddit he sometimes talks to lazlo on… nervous probably still uses aol because he doesn’t know anything new has come out and he’s also on the niche strangetown forums

loner: erm i don’t know actually because he doesn’t have a personality. twitter, probably. he has a lot of extremely middling, inoffensive takes. sorry to this man

grunt: ripp is on everythingggggg twitter instagram twitter discord TUMBLR reddit 4chan tiktok probably fucking pinterest . buzz has a facebook that he only uses to post about his job, tank’s accomplishments, and buck sometimes. buck is also an animal jam kid with jill but he’s also giving roblox vibes. he would be an ipad kid if buzz paid enough attention to him to give him an ipad

singles: 4 single attractive girls in their twenties living together? y’all that is a tiktok influencer house 😭😭 that’s their social media of choice

[fleur2pint]

nsfw alphabet x narcissa m.

a/n: THIS IS MY FIRST NSFW HC LIKE THIS PLEASE DON’T BE DISAPPOINTEDDDD I TRIED! can i just say this lowkey took me forever to do... anyway

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

narcissa is the QUEEN of aftercare. i just imagine her pulling you close to her after a long overstim session or helping you walk to the bathroom from how sore your legs/hips are. Idk i just feel like her heat is too big for this world

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

on you, she definitely has a thing for your ass/thighs. she loves how soft that part of your body is and how they build your perfect curves for her.

on her, probably her hands. i only say that because no matter what her intention is she always manages to make you feel a certain way when she touches you. sexually, in a nurturing way, it never mattered. as long as she knew she was making you feel good.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

i think one of her favorite things is watching you cum over, and over, and over. i think she just loves watching the way you can cum from the things she does to you, therefore she loves overstimulating you. whether it be from her eating you out, fucking you with her strap, using a vibrator, whatever, she just can’t get enough of the way your body reacts to her.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

one thing she would never admit to you is that she loves when you top her, she loves watching you try to act tough and in charge. but at the end of the day nothing better than her being your dom. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

she’s a milf! what can i say! she’s extremely experienced and knows exactly what she’s doing. not only has she been around longer to experience more, she’s also just super kinky and into a lot in general. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

she’s a simple lady, as long as shes fucking you that’s all she really cares about. but if she had to pick, she loves it when you ride her. as you desperately grind yourself against her, it shows her how much you need her. idk. there’s some thought behind it but only she would know.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

i mean… i think it depends on the time. i think at times she can be really funny when she just wants to be with you and have fun, and other times super serious. but most of the time i think she would be pretty dead set on some stuff.

H = Hair (how well-groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

narcissa keeps things tidy down there, she keeps it nice for you tho. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

like i’ve said, it kinda depends on how she’s feeling. i just imagine have some super lazy morning sex and her being super lovey with you but then her switching up and showing no mercy at a different time. but no matter what, she always tells you how good you’re doing. words of encouragement!

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

i imagine her having a dedicated small closet full of sex toys she likes to use weather it be for her, on you, for the both of you, etc. i feel like she masturbates more than you’d think only because she likes seeing you cum more than having herself get off. so she does it herself.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

narcissa’s got a thing for EVERYTHINGGGGGG! but some of her biggest is without a doubt overstim, voyeurism, and mild mdlg. tell me i’m wrong.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

she’s a major risk-taker, so she’d be down to fuck anywhere. she likes the thrill of possibly getting caught. but i think her favorite spot is absolutely anywhere in your home. it’s almost like a little game you guys have. where haven’t you done it yet? The laundry room? what about the kitchen?

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

things like your little sighs or movements are enough to get her going. she’s an all-the-way kind of person, if i’m being honest she’s always turned on lol.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

she is NOT into pain of any kind. She doesn’t wanna hurt you :(

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

definitely giving. no questions asked. if you were to ask her why she’d probably say something like “it’s the way you taste, darling.” 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

slow every time, only so she could see the faces you make when she touches you. or listen to the sounds you make when she’s deep inside you. Ughhhh, a dream.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

not a huge fan of quickies because she does like to take her time. she wants to make sure you’re comfortable and happy with what she’s doing. she also doesn’t want you to hold anything back. SHE LOVES WHEN YOU’RE VOCAL!!!

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

Definitely not a stranger to taking risks. As long as she knows she’s not hurting either of you excessively and that she’ll be able to take good care of you after, she’s game for almost anything.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

She can last a while, as she loves to edge you for what seems like an eternity before finally letting you come. However, once the two of you have gone for a round or two, she tires out pretty quickly.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

as i said, i just imagine her having a cute little stash of vibrators, dildos, anal plugs, and so on. so she very much is into using toys. She would use them on the both of you, when you’re together when you’re alone. LMAOOOO i just imagine her lending you some like it’s not a big deal.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

oh jesusssss she’d be so mf unfair. i think she would honestly just not stick to her word and just walk all over you. for example! “oh honey, i know i said i just wanted 3 out of you, but i think it’s only right if we go up to 5. yeah?” FALSE CLAIMSSSSS

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

narcissa isn’t very vocal. there. i said it. idk i just can’t imagine her being like “oh yes!” you know? it’s not her. but god does she love making you scream. honestly, the way she gets herself off when she is alone is by thinking of your little noises. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

narcissa doesn’t see sex and a conjoined effort, she just wants to please YOU! yeah, she lets you return the favor from time to time. but to her, it’s all for you. Because she loves youuuuuu.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

definitely wears bra and panty sets. But she’s not into the crazy, colorful stuff. Just simple, black, lacy, sexy sets. But under under… oooooooo. tbh she has a nice body! i feel like her figure would be a tad curvy but she still feels like a complete woman. 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

i’ll be honest, narcissa sex drive is quite average. she’s not the kind of person to want to fuck 24/7 but she’s also not the one who’s “tired”. honestly, if you just asked her if you guys could have sex, she’d never say no let’s just put it that way.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

she doesn’t get to fall asleep right away because she’s too busy worrying about you! she wants to make sure you’re okay before anything. then she’ll hold you until fall asleep happily in her arms.

[pxnk-velvet]

BABYSITTING WITH THEM

Naruto, Kakashi, Shikamaru

Summary: What I think these Naruto characters would be like babysitting.

Warnings: children, none

Let me know if you wanna see what any other characters are like babysitting 😁

Naruto

let’s be real, at first he’s bitching about this

saying he doesn’t want to and could be on a real mission

you basically have to drag him over there

but once you get into the swing of things

HE’S HAVING SO MUCH FUN

like who knew babysitting a spunky little two year old would be so entertaining

for him at least....not so much for you

you’re basically running around the whole time making sure they don’t do anything outta pocket

you ended babysitting two kids that night tbh

Kakashi

no doubt in my mind he knows how to take care of a small child

like everythingggggg

how to change diapers properly, how to burp them, how to save them if they’re choking

THOSE KIND OF THINGS

honestly doesn’t show it but is lowkey loving it the whole time

very neutral and normal on the outside

BUT ON THE INSIDE, mans is buggin

he doesn’t know if he wants to hug the baby or squeeze it lol

but very responsible when he wants to be

the whole time you’re just....😳

a family with kakashi? coming right up!

Shikamaru

shikamaru, shikamaru, shikamaru

doesn’t want to do it but knows he has to

feels better knowing that you’re there to help as well

team work is the dream work with him

y’all spilt up tasks equally

at one point mans was completely overthinking simple tasks like warming up the baby’s bottle

you did have to step in a couple times just to make sure he didn’t over complicated things

but in the end he did actually enjoy sitting down with the kid and just relaxing

is somehow a king at putting the kid to sleep??? don’t know, it just- IT MAKES SENSE

[thatskepticalbitchcara]

red flags or manageable and no these are not all related to my ex

-their music type is hot 100

-they post ootd’s on instagram

-they still have pics of their ex on social media

-they’re a health and fitness nut and track everything they consume

-they prefer spending their weekends at bars/clubs

-they don’t go to therapy

-they haven’t read a book since 2019

-they tell their best friend everythingggggg

-practicing catholic

- totally manageable, not really an issue especially if they’re open to new music

- manageable, but using instagram a ton is kind of a red flag but maybe more like a pink flag

- oof. red flag unless they don’t use social media much etc.

- red flag

- totally not compatible with me, it wouldn’t work

- not a red flag. this totally depends. do they need therapy? are they open to it? have they gone in the past? why don’t they go? etc.

- not a red flag

- ehhhhhhh manageable

- LMAO MAJOR MAJOR RED FLAG

[bunnybabymae]

Look at my baby avocado tree grow!! Doin so we’ll since I put her in a pot and switched to filtered water cause I learned they’re super sensitive to salt and literally everythingggggg 😩

[sunflowerbloomss]

i think that if anyone who isn’t jewish would watch this show they just wouldn’t understand the nuances of it. everything they say about the holocaust, the huge difference between esty and yael, moishe’s remark about zionism when the dude at the hotel said they’re open to people from israel, the meaning of everything they do (cutting esty’s hair, having so many layers of clothing) like!!!!!! i still think goyim watching this would enjoy because it’s just so well done but the second you understand the nuance it’s just spectacular. the costume design is amazing, the editing, everythingggggg god

[tellywoodtrash]

immj2 20.11.20

new title card! everyone looking hottttttttttttttttt af!

no for real though, this chick needs to fucking insure her feet or something. itne disaster-prone pair maine zindagi mein nahi dekhe.

this idiot. honestly, he needs to know to pick his battles. he used to be soooooooo smart and shaatir. now he’s just dumb as fuckkkkkkk, the way he’s playing the game. i really don’t understand. i just don’t.

“riddhima tumhe pata hai tumhari problem kya hai? tum khud aage badhke apne bure waqt ki ghadi set karti ho.” lmaooooooo that’s a brilliant line and exactly what she does!

standard DON’T YOU DARE LOOK AT MY FAMILY WRONG blah blah from riddhima.

trollolololololololololol i honestly just put up with this character just to see vishal play himmmmmmm

blah blah tell dadi that i should get the business, then the property, then the family, and then this room of his....... ew, gross implication of that room thing aside, bro slow your rolllllllllllll. also why are you tellling her all this??? why the fuckkkkk would you give her a heads-up?!?!!?!?

sweetheart bhi bola. ugh. i hate when any man calls any woman that. it sounds patronizing and condescending as fuckkkk. also i just don’t get why he wants to be like vansh so muchhhhhhhhh when HIS PERSONALITY IS OBJECTIVELY BETTER THAN VANSH’S WAS?!!?!?!!?

ok i’m bored with this scene now and fwding.

pls sis, don’t say wohiiiiiiiii shakal and all. new shakal is >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> old shakal. like, i have no words to describe the improvement.

here aryan be making some stupid shady deals and he’s like mwahahahahaha now that vansh is gone, there’s no one to stop me!!!!!! dude, he literally used to do that to prevent you from going to fucking jail, lmao. you are so fuckingggggggg dumb istg.

“sivaaye mere!” snort. this i’m gonna enjoyyyyyyyyyyy.

aryan like TU KAUN MAIN KHAMAAKHAAAAN?!!!?!? and quite rightly so.

this is their new thing in the show. they show this angle of kabir jab uski kuch zyaaaada hi khisakkkkk jaati hai. 

AKLSJALKFJSLKDJFLSDKJFLKDSJLFKJDSLKFJDSLKJFLSKJD OMFG HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

“seedhe mooh baat kii thi. tameez se jawaab dena chahiye tha.”

lmaooooooooooooooo i can’tttttttttt with this fuckerrrrrrr. why is he so fuckingggggg hilarious?????

meanwhile bhaabiji is back at mandir place asking around about vihaan. she’s describing him as “bodybuilder type” which, lol......... ok.

chaiwaala is i know who he is and can give you deets.

she’s like yehiiii haina???? and he’s like yeah kinda, but hotter. way hotter. ok he didn’t say it. i’m saying it. BUT IT’S THE TRUTH, COME ON!!!!!!!!!!!

holy shit she just had to give him 2x my wholeass monthly rentttttttt to get the deets. what the fuckkkkkkkkkkkkk????? ALSO MY GOD WHO JUST CARRIES AROUND THIS MUCH CASH IN THEIR LIL DINKY GOING-TO-THE-MANDIR PURSE???????????

bhaiyyaji very very happy with his loot of the day butttttttttttt.........

lmao this one like I WORKED REALLY HARD AS AN ACCOUNTANT TO EARN THAT WAD OF CASH THAT SHE JUST HANDED TO YOU OK??????? YOU THINK SHE MAKES THIS MUCH AS NO-NAME PHYSIOTHERAPIST WITH A GRAND TOTAL OF ONE CLIENT????? AND NOW I’VE HAD TO SWITCH CAREERS. IN THE MIDDLE OF A PANDEMIC. I HAD TO LEARN A WHOLEEEEEEEE NEW SKILLSET. YOU KNOW HOW MANY HOURS I SPENT ON COURSERA AND UDEMY AND GITHUB RIGHT AFTER FALLING OFF A CLIFF?????????? DO YA???????????

sorry shaktimaan.

“virus hoon main. ek baar laga gaya na toh zindagi ka file corrupt kar doonga.” lmaoooooooooo lord the dumbass tech related metaphorsssss.

ok that’s a bit much but mmmmmm baby i love to watch you work. esp. this outfit, unf. it’s really getting me so damn hot for you.

khud ki hi biwi ka phone number score karke itnaaaaaa khush kisi ko hote hue pehli baar dekha hai.

lmaooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

aryan, who is literally tied to a chair is growling at kabir about how this won’t end well for him and kabir’s like..............

snorttttttttt i love this psychopathhhhhh.

kabir is like just use your ickle brain cell lil one. i’m a cop. i have alllll the details of every single shady thing you’ve done. first i’ll show it to the family, then to the authorities. and then there miiiiiiiiiiight be an encounter later.......... lmao yessssssssss, i love it.

“woh kya haina, samajhdaar ko ishaara kaafi hota hai. lekin tum itne samajhdaar nahi ho na, iss liye itne detail mein samjhaana pada!” i really cannot stop laughing at this scene. truly the evil bros dynamic i have been craving for from this show.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaand that is enough for aryan to maarofy palti.

but ooooooooooops. he called him kabir. which we know is this one’s sore spot these days.

“kabir.................... sir?” lmfaooooooooooooo

hahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha

bitch wht you callllllll vansh?????

“kabir...... bhai.”

OMFG THE STRAIGHT UP ORGASM FACE HE MADE AT THAT?!?!!??!?! JESUS KABIR I THINK YOU NEED THERAPY FOR THIS. EVEN FREUD DIDN’T COME UP WITH A THEORY FOR WHATEVER FREAKY “BHAIYYA ISSUES” YOU HAVE GROWN ALL OF A SUDDEN OUTTA NOWHERE.

aryan is literally like...............................

“ab BHAIYYA ki do baat dhyaaaaan sunna, ok????”

ok deal done. do shady fuckers have allied. kaisi ram milaaye usa-uk type jodi hai paapiyon ki.

aryan like but everything belongs to dadi now, and dadi is forsho gonna hand it all over to her laadli riddhima, who hates your guts.

“tum jitna smart mujhe samajhte ho, usse kahinnnnnn zyaada smart hoon main.”

aryan like ok but fr how exactly are you gonna achieve this??????/

“bhagwaan ne pehle hi tumhe dimaag kam diya hai. issi umar mein sab use karloge toh aage kya karoge??? jitna bola gaya hai, utna karo.” LMAO PLS MAN CAN WHOEVER IS WRITING KABIR’S LINES WRITE THEM FOR VIHAAN TOOOOOOOO. COZ THESE ARE GENUINELY SO FUNNY AND HIS ARE SOOOOOOO FUCKING LAME.

riddhima walks in to aryan having already gotten dadi’s ear and having kabir involved in the business. he’s already signing papers and shit! idhar mereko debit card use karte waqt 4 baar sign karna hota hai to prove i’m the actual owner and didn’t just steal it from somewhere, and this guy just got signing authority to a wholeass empire in half an hour.

aryan talking soooooooooooo nicely about kabir and riddhima is like OK FOR SURE THIS FUCKER HAS BEEN THREATENED AND/OR BRIBED.

lmaooooooooo aryan again referred to him as “kabir” and K just cleared his throat all ominously. and promptlyyyyyyy aryan’s like “KABIR BHAI!!!! KABIR BHAI!!!!!!!!!”

uska jhattttt jawaaab bhi mil gaya universe se, hahahahahaha.

kaunsa bhai, kahaan ka bhai, haaaaan??????

oh boy. this angle again.

“isse vansh bhai ki jagah dena, business mein involve karna; kya deal hui hai tumhari, kitne mein becha hai tumne apne aap ko; bolo?!?!?!? ki tumhe yeh achanak se apna bhai lagne laga hai????” DAMN. I LOVE ISHANI. SHE’S SHARP AS A TACK. WHY THE FUCK WON’T DADI JUST GIVE HER THE EMPIRE?????????

dadi talking blah blah anupriya ka beta hai, yeh bhi tumhare bhai haina. god shut upppppppppp dadi.

“jeete-jee toh nahi, dadi. mere liye bhai ka sirf ek matlab tha, vansh bhai.” aw mannnnnnnnnnnn. i really hope we get more ishani/vansh-vihaan when he enters the house. i really wanna see more of their bond. he always was so soft for siya, but it’s so obvious that ishani loves him beyond belief. what a shame to not show us more of that.

“respect earn kii jaati hai, zabardasti lee nahi jaati.” DAMN RIGHT SIS. YOU TELL EMMMMMMMMMMMMM.

ab iss angle mein atke issko yeh kaun samjhaaye???

you know that realllllllllly dumbass cringeworthy song called psycho saiyyaan? they should remake it for this show and call it “aaya mora BHAIYYA psycho!!!”

so apt!

dadi apologizing some more for ishani and giving kabir khulaaaaaaaa rein to handle business. riddhima not happy about this and decides kuchhhhh toh karna hogaaaaaa.

she finally remembers of angre’s existence and that he is the only one who’ll really help her.

ISS GHAR KE SAARE MARD EK SE BADHKAR EK PAAGAL HAIN.

riddhima saying the saaaaaaame thing.

angre se bro ka judaai sahaa nahi jaa raha. brotp ho toh aisa.not that vansh articularly deserves this much love and loyalty, seeing the way he treated angre, but angre’s saying he was my boss, bhai, dost, everythingggggg to meeeee. awwww.

BUT ALSO THIS FUCKER FULLLLLY DOING THIS DRAMA HAVING HELPED VANSH SURVIVE AND CHANGE IDENTITIES, LIKH KE LELO MERE SE.

ishani coming in and is like at least he’s grieving bhai’s death. you toh let some other fucker into the house on bhai’s terhvi itself.

“sab apni life mein aage badh gaye hain. aise behave karr rahe hain jaise kuch hua hi nahi hai! kisi ko koi parvaah hi nahi hai ki vansh bhai humaare beech nahi hain.” aw mannn, i honestly love her the mosttttttttttttttt.

she’s like angre’s trying to take his pain out, usse toh chain paane do.

riddhima got a message from chaiwaala (no, not the one at 7, race course road) and bounces.

meanwhile angre is telling ishani to give the belt back and stop pretending she gives a fuck about him. she’s like i don’t, but i know you loved bhai as much as i do. so i won’t let you do this to yourself.

she’s like if you really want to honour him and give him peace, then we need to make a plan so that the fucker who’s ghusofied into his house can’t take his place. OMG YOU GUYS THEY’RE TEAMING UPPPPPPP?!?!?!??!!?  A GENTLE BREAKTHROUGH!!!!!!!! HONESTLY, VANSH’S DEATH HAS BROUGHT NOTHING BUT GOOD THINGS TO THIS SHOW.

cutiepie is waiting for wifey to show up. has some stupidass tech dialogue to maarofy about it but the less said about that, the better.

“message padha bhi nahi??? kaise pata karoon????” lmao itna bada hacker hai, and he’s at the mercy of whatsapp ka blue tick feature like the rest of us. 

not to worry boo. she’s on her waaaaaay.

WHY THE FUCK DOES HE STILLLLLLLL HAVE ALL THE PICS OF THE FAM LYING OUT IF HE KNOWS SHE’S GONNA SHOW UP?!?!!?!?!?!

“intezaar bhi tab tak cute lagta hai jab tak frustrate na kar de; miss..... pretty raisinghania!” dude, whether he’s vansh or not, he’s simping so hard for her. i fucking love it.

oh shit she walks in as he’s heartttttteyeing over her piccccccc.

oh nope. he’s the flash flying jatt. already disappeared behind his desk.

yeah girl. i know. I KNOW!!!!!!!

[first-khaotung]

they’re EVERYTHINGGGGGG