#they were barely outdoor cats before (they were only in the back yard if we were too) so they're adjusting really well

[hemaris]

and i didn't even post about this yet but my boys are now INDOORS CATS! ❤️

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

When the Sun Goes Down

This story is a heavily edited adaptation of “Gabriel-Ernest”, written by H.H. Munro in 1909. I owe this whole story to @tinyplaidninjas​ (thank you for helping me fix my werewolf story dilemma).

This is almost 3k words long, fair warning

tw: kinda horny, nudity

---

"There is a wild beast in your woods," said Lambert, as the two men were being driven to the station. It was the only remark he’d made during the drive, but since Geralt had talked incessantly about his latest publication in the Kaedwen Journal of Medicine, his half-brother’s silence had not been noticeable.

"A stray fox or two, or perhaps some wandering brownies. Nothing more formidable," said Geralt. His brother said nothing.

---

"What did you mean about a wild beast?" Geralt asked later, when they were on the train platform with their bags and tickets in hand. Geralt was bound for his private woodland estate while Lambert was making his way into town to visit with friends. 

"Nothing. Probably just my wild imagination running away with me again. Here comes the train," Lambert rushed. 

Geralt found it odd, but said nothing. Perhaps he should not have gone on at length about the Medical Journal in the carriage. Perhaps Lambert was tired or overanxious about his meeting with Aiden. It had been years since the two college friends had seen each other in person and Geralt knew that his brother held the other, equally brilliant artist in high esteem. Surely, that was the reason for Lambert’s odd dismissal of his questions.

---

Once he’d returned to his estate and unpacked his bags, Geralt decided to take a stroll through the woods. He often took a leisurely walk in the late afternoon; the trees were full of chittering animals and preening birds this time of day, after all. The natural scientist and medical doctor found the great outdoors to be brimming with new discoveries. He wanted to pick everything apart and reassemble it accurately and down to the last minute detail. He wanted to know why certain animals behaved the way they did and how they communicated with each other. He wanted to know why the little white flowering plants in his yard only bloomed every other day. He craved the answer to the universal question of why as it applied to everything.

The doctor would often spend long afternoons sitting absolutely still in the center of his garden, observing the wildlife as it moved around him. Last summer he’d even managed to get a wild rabbit to eat out of his hand. 

Now, though, the forest path seemed uncomfortably quiet. Had a larger predator taken to wandering his grounds? If so, he’d need to send word to a local hunter’s lodge and request assistance in ridding himself of the pest. As he was debating who to inquire after, he came across an unusual sight.

On a shelf of smooth stone overhanging a deep pool just to the side of the path, a boy of eighteen lay asprawl. He was drying his tan, dripping limbs luxuriously in the light of the late-summer sun and he had very few cares about doing so, according to his state of complete undress. His wet brown hair, (disheveled as it was by a recent mussing with his long, slender fingers) and bright blue eyes, so light that there was an almost cat-like gleam to them, were aimed in Geralt’s direction with a sense of lazy watchfulness. 

He was an unexpected although not unwelcome apparition, and Geralt found himself quite ignoring his eldest brother’s good advice of “thinking before one spoke”. He narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest in what he hoped was a stance of great authority. 

"What are you doing on my property?" he demanded. “And have you no shame? Trespassing for a cool dip in the water I could forgive, but you don’t even have the proper clothing to do so.”

"Obviously I came here to have a swim and sun myself," replied the boy. “I rather like how it feels to be bare beneath the warmth of the open sky.”

"Where do you live?" Geralt inquired, stepping closer. Every instinct in his body was telling him to run. To flee this place and the presence of his estate’s mysterious visitor.

"Here and there within these woods."

"You can't live in the woods," Geralt frowned. “It’s not proper.”

"They are very nice woods," said the boy. To Geralt his tone sounded almost patronizing. Borderline condescending. The doctor bristled and stepped forward again. 

“You can’t possibly be surviving out here like this!”

“I am rather proficient at fending for myself.”

"Then where do you sleep at night?"

"I don't sleep at night,” the boy winked one of his cornflower eyes. The movement had Geralt’s head reeling and his heart thundering within the confines of his waistcoat. “That's my busiest time, dear heart."

"What do you eat?" the young professor and doctor finally asked. It felt as if that question had been on the tip of his tongue since he’d seen the strange creature come into view and only now did he have the adequate terror in his veins to ask it. 

"Flesh," said the boy. He said the word slowly and carefully, almost as if he was running his tongue along every later to catch their flavor.

“What a horrible thing to say.”

“Hmm, it is the truth,” the slender youth rolled onto his back and tilted his head over the stony ledge. His mop of chestnut hair dangled down towards the water and he gazed steadily at the doctor from upside down, “I am plenty good at catching hares and birds and mice and men. I am not picky, you see. I gobble them all up.”

Geralt nearly choked on his tongue. His face flushed and his cheeks grew hot with indignance (and perhaps something else, a stirring in his belly that he quietly ignored). The audacity of such a creature! Such open and frank fliration was unheard of, especially since he was so indecorously nude!

"I can’t imagine you’re eating well. The rabbits on my estate have never been easy to trap or catch or corner. Not even my father’s best games keeper could do it, and that man lived on the property for nearly sixty years.”

"It is easier for me to hunt them than it is for your game keeper to trap them, Dr. Bellegarde,” the boy winked again. The sound of his name in the stranger’s mouth had Geralt mildly panicked. Did he know this improper young villain? Had he forgotten the boy’s name? Had the lad followed him back from university? The strange young man added another cryptic statement, “At night I hunt on four feet. It’s faster that way.”

"I suppose you’re referring to a dog?" Geralt offered. “And wouldn’t that be considered poaching, you hunting on my lands at night with your hound?”

The boy laughed a weird, low laugh; it was pleasantly like a chuckle and disagreeably like a snarl. Both portions of the sound had Geralt’s heart racing even faster in his chest. It felt nearly as painful as he’d expected from cardiac distress and he breathed evenly like he’d been taught to do under such duress. Slowly, the panicked feeling faded away and he gazed back at his trespasser with narrowed eyes. “Why are you laughing, then?”

"I don't think any dog would be very anxious for my company, especially not at night. We wouldn’t get along with each other, me and a dog.”

Geralt began to suspect (with a deep and primal sense of ever growing dread) that there was something odd and uncanny about the strange-eyed, silver-tongued youth lounging above the pond. He uncrossed his arms and put his hands on his hips, “Well you can’t keep sleeping in the woods.”

“I fancy you’d rather not have me in your house.”

The prospect of this wild, naked animal loose in the professor’s neatly ordered and well-kept manor was certainly an alarming one. Geralt glared and shook his head, dislodging some of his long white hair from its ribbon. 

"If you don't go then I shall have to make you.”

The boy flipped onto his front in a flash and plunged into the pool. In the span of a moment he had crossed the short expanse of water and flung his glistening body half-way up the bank where Geralt was standing. For an otter the movement would not have been remarkable; for a boy it was sufficiently startling. Geralt’s leather-booted foot slipped as he jerked backwards involuntarily. After his arms windmilled for a moment and his balance failed him, the young doctor found himself almost prostrate on the slippery weed-grown shore of the pond with those cat-like blue eyes mere inches from his own. 

He raised a hand to his throat instinctively and the boy laughed again; a laugh in which the snarl had nearly driven out the chuckle entirely. Then, with another of his astonishing lightning movements, the naked youth plunged out of view into a yielding tangle of weed and fern.

"What an extraordinarily wild animal!" said Geralt as he picked himself up. Then he recalled Lambert’s remark on the train station’s waiting platform: "There is a wild beast in your woods."

As he meandered his way back towards the manor proper, Dr. Bellegarde began to turn over in his mind some of the various local occurrences which might be traceable to the existence of his astonishing young savage.

According to the local paper, gathered the day previous by his valet, something had been thinning the game in the woods lately. Poultry had gone missing from several neighboring farms and factories, hares and rabbits were growing unaccountably scarcer, and complaints had reached the local constabulary of lambs being carried out of their pastures in the hills. Could it be possible that this wild boy was really hunting the countryside with a pack of obedient hounds? 

The oddly pretty creature had spoken of hunting "four-footed" by night, but then, again, he had hinted strangely at no dog caring to come near him, "especially at night." It was certainly puzzling. 

And then, as Geralt was running his mind over the various odd occurrences he’d heard reported from the village in the past few months, he came suddenly to a dead stop. The young man that had gone missing from the milling town upriver two months ago--the accepted theory was that he had tumbled into the millwheel and been swept away; but the boy’s mother had insisted that merely run away with some village girl (who had also disappeared). 

He thought of the village youngster, who’d been applying to attend Oxenfurt at the time of his mysterious yet apparent death. Perhaps they were one in the same; but then, why in all the world, would a college hopeful by lying naked in the woods outside Dr. Bellegarde’s lonesome manor house? It was odd. Very odd.

"Where's your voice gone to, Doctor?" asked his housekeeper, Ms. Merrigold. "One would think you had seen a wolf on your walk."

At breakfast next morning, Geralt was overwhelmingly conscious that his feeling of uneasiness regarding yesterday's episode with the boy had not wholly disappeared. He had decided to go into the village and talk with Lambert about the “beast in his woods” and learn what his brother had really seen that had made him so twitchy. With his day planned and his mind slightly more settled, his usual cheerfulness partially returned. The doctor hummed a bright little melody as he sauntered to the morning-room for his customary cup of tea with Ms. Merrigold. 

As Geralt entered the morning-room and scanned the familiar space his humming made way abruptly for a quietly shouted curse. Gracefully laid out atop his red velvet settee, in an attitude of almost exaggerated repose, was the boy from the woods. He was drier than when the doctor had last seen him, but still he remained entirely naked. Every inch of his lovely, soft-looking skin was on display; Geralt averted his eyes as quickly as possible and tried to hide his blushing face from the grinning minx.

"How dare you come in here like this!” he huffed.

"You told me I was not allowed to stay in the woods," said the boy calmly. He propped his elbow up on the cushion and laid his cheek against his palm, languidly stretching his legs out at the same time. The doctor breathed deeply and kept his eyes firmly locked with the strange young man’s. 

"I did not invite you to come here!"

“Then I have misunderstood,” the boy sighed. The hand that had been supporting his head moved down and flattened against the settee. His arm straightened and his torso lengthened with the movement. Now sitting with one knee resting slightly bent atop the other, his hair messy and his shockingly blue eyes half-lidded, he looked like the painting of a young Cupid. 

“Triss!” Geralt called, desperate for another person to intervene on his behalf. To save him from this tempting little beast. “Triss, fetch one of the pantry boys. We have a guest and he’s...he’s quite out of sorts.”

“Yes, Dr. Bellegarde,” his housekeeper called back. “Right away, sir!”

The boy giggled from the couch and Geralt whirled back to look at him. His finger was playing gently with the plumpest part of his lip and the young professor found himself flushing yet again. “Yes, Dr. Bellegard. Hurry to cover me up right away.” 

---

Lambert was less than helpful when Geralt first asked about the beastly reference he’d made at the station.

"My dear father died of some brain trouble," he explained, "So you will understand why I am averse to dwelling on anything of an impossibly fantastic nature that I may see or think that I have seen. I don’t even know that I saw anything, you understand?”

"I am a medical doctor, Lambert, of course I understand. But what did you see?" Geralt inquired. “I must know.”

"What I thought I saw was something so extraordinary that no really sane man could dignify it with the credit of having actually happened. I was standing at the end of the lane near your manor property, half-hidden in the hedge growth by the orchard gate. I’d been watching the dying glow of the sunset and committing to memory for use in a future painting. Nothing extraordinary, of course, but beautiful nonetheless. 

“It was then that I became aware of a naked boy. I assumed that he was a bather from some neighboring pool who was standing out on the bare hillside, also taking a moment to watch and appreciate the sunset. His pose was so suggestive of some wild faun of Pagan myth that I instantly wanted to engage him as a model, and in another moment I think I should have hailed him over to my hiding spot to discuss such a matter. Just then, however, the sun was lost over the edge of the horizon and the last of its warm orange glow slid away. The landscape was left a cold and gloomy grey.”

“And what of the boy? Your language is poetic, Lambert, but I’ve grown rather impatient!”

“The boy was gone, Geralt!”

"What? Did he simply vanish into nothing like some ghost or phantom?"

"No; that’s the most terrifying part, you see," answered the artist; "That’s the whole reason I didn’t want to tell you about this problem in the first place. Geralt, my dearest brother, on the open hillside where my momentary muse had been standing a second before, there was a wolf instead. It had shaggy brown-black fur and huge, gleaming fangs. Most terrifying of all were its huge, bright blue eyes.”

Geralt’s mind whirled with the new information. Lambert had indeed given him the details he’d so desperately needed to draw his final, strange conclusion: the boy was a werewolf! He thanked his younger half-sibling and made his departure, hurrying back to the manor as quickly as possible.

He had to make it home before dark.

---

“The moon isn’t full tonight,” the boy sighed. Triss had managed to wrestle him into a clean shirt and a pair of cropped blue breeches but despite the clothing he still seemed to ooze a sense of easy, naked confidence. The slim brunette was draped across the chaise lounge of Geralt’s personal study, his bare feet hanging over the arm. 

“So?”

“So I will not transform into the horrible monster you fear I shall become,” he sighed again. He rolled his eyes in Geralt’s direction and smirked. “You and your housekeeper are safe. As is your cook, your pageboy, your valet, and your terribly friendly mare. Roach, right?”

“Hmm. You’ve been through my things?”

“Triss allowed me to wander the house and the grounds but then she forced me to bathe again when I came back in,” he frowned. “Soap does not agree with me and neither do these prickly, constricting clothes.”

“And your name?” Geralt asked, finally. “Since you have proven to know me already.”

“You may call me Jaskier,” the boy said, popping up from the couch. He offered his hand, which Geralt shook rather nervously. “And I’ve already decided that I’m going to be staying for awhile.”

“Why should I allow you to stay?” the young doctor bristled. “What have you to offer me in return for room and board?”

“I have no money, but I’m a wonderful gardener and I’m sure that there are, Dr. Bellegarde, other ways we can pass the time together. I sense that we are kindred spirits in many ways.”

Geralt blushed and swallowed hard, blinking down at the boy, whose fingers were playing with the material of the doctor’s cravat. His blue eyes peeked up through their bordering black lashes and Geralt’s will crumbled to dust. “Alright. I suppose you can stay; if it keeps the village safe.”

“Very safe,” the werewolf, Jaskier, smiled. His delicate little paw with its long, lithe fingers spread over the material of Geralt’s silk waistcoat, right over his heart. “So very safe, indeed.”

[sometimesitrytowritethings]

Mountain Man: Part 3

Part 1 | Part 2 | PART 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8

Pairing: Arthur Morgan x Reader

Word count: 5k

Warnings: Swearing, Mourning, Nudity

Summary: You never thought you’d love again. Then Arthur Morgan came into town. Fate continuously has you meeting each other in odd ways, and a troubled past is something you are both familiar with. Perhaps that’s what will make this time different.

-----

The smell of soap filled the air on the porch of the boarding house, the same as it did every other Thursday. Work didn’t start until the late afternoon, so you took the extra time in the morning to do some chores around the boarding house. It wasn’t the most entertaining of times, but it netted you a good ten dollars off of your monthly rent, and you recently had been able to convince Ben to work on his reading as you washed.

This week, there was notably more to wash, with an additional border at the house. Mary seemed nice enough, if a little arrogant, and had offered to pay you an additional five dollars to wash her laundry alongside yours. Given that it looked like she hadn’t worked with her hands a day in her life, and not expecting much to wash after the woman’s short stay, you’d agreed.

However, you were surprised to note that, over the course of less than one week, Mary had managed to need five chemises, three skirts, and four blouses washed. At first, you had balked at the large pile of laundry, who goes through so much in one week? Seemingly having missed your surprised face, Mary had thanked you before heading back inside, mentioning something about coffee and a book.

Honestly, you would have been furious with her if you hadn’t taken the time to look at the clothes. The majority of them were mostly clean, the shirts slightly scented with sweat, and the skirts and chemises had a light ring of dirt on the hem. All of these clothes could have easily been worn weeks or even months longer before they even needed to be considered for washing. This left you more amused than it did irritated - if she wanted to pay you to essentially dip her clothes in soapy water while you were doing the rest of the wash anyway, you would certainly take the extra money.

You hummed quietly, lightly scrubbing the dirt from the hem of one of her skirts, as Ben practiced reading to you from an “Otis Miller” storybook that he had been slowly working his way through. He would slowly sound out each word, as you had taught him, and occasionally ask for help with larger, unfamiliar words. 

He had read through an entire 5 pages by the time Mary had come outside to join you. She held two steaming cups of coffee in her hands and her book under her arm, as she sat in the worn rocking chair. She placed one cup at her side and held the other out for you. “I’ve made it fresh, I thought you might like some,” she mentioned with a smile. “And to thank you for helping me out with my laundry.”

You smiled back and stood, wiping your wet hands on your skit. Was it still considered being helpful if you were only doing it because she paid you? You supposed it didn’t really matter. “I’m glad to help out, Mary,” you reached for the cup, holding it and enjoying the warmth on your hands, “thank you for the coffee.” There was a small stool next to where Ben sat, which you took, ruffling his hair and giving him a kiss on the top of his head as you sat next to him. 

Having seen you take a break from work, Ben looked up from his book. “Mama, can I go play?” He had been hard at work for about an hour - he deserved a break.

You nodded, and he immediately darted out towards the long grass in the yard, where a cat was sleeping lazily in the sun. Upon hearing Bens footsteps, the poor animal stood up and dashed to his left. The cat was fast, but your son was determined - he dashed after her. You laughed lightly and sipped your coffee, keeping an eye on the boy. “Have you been enjoying your stay so far?” you asked, not exactly comfortable with the silence.

Mary was also watching Ben with a small smile on her face. “As much as possible. It’s a…” she paused, evidently searching for the right word, “charming little town, and I do wish I were here under better circumstances.” The diplomatic answer. Valentine was a dirty, smelly old town and everyone who lived there knew it. The nickname “Mudtown” had stuck for a reason. 

“I’m sorry if this is too forward of me, but if you don’t mind me asking,” you started, fiddling with the warm coffee cup in your hands and turning your gaze to her. The steam from your cup was rising in the cool morning air, and the warmth seeped into your chilled fingers nicely. “What brings you to Valentine? Most of the time we only get tradesmen and livestock around here. It’s not usually the kind of place for a high-society lady like yourself.”

Mary seemed only slightly taken aback by your question. She must have been asked the same thing nearly every day since her arrival - everyone knew this was not a town for tourists. If she wanted to have a taste of the outdoors, she was much better off in Strawberry, which you had heard was recently marketing itself as a mountain resort. “Oh! Well, I suppose you’ll find out eventually, but I would appreciate it if you don’t spread the word around,” she looked off into the distance as she spoke, as if she was too embarrassed to look into your eyes.

“Of course.”

She sighed before continuing, her breath blowing the steam from her coffee away from her. “My brother, little Jamie, he’s run off and,” she paused and she chewed lightly on her bottom lip, “and joined the Chelonians. I’ve heard he’s been seen around here and was hoping to convince him to come home.”

“The Chelonians?” you had recognised the name from the papers, but had never really paid attention to the group. Supposedly they were camped nearby, in the mountains, but you didn’t know much else. They had never bothered to come into town that you know of, and most people rarely had time or interest in venturing so far away, so no one you knew had actually seen them in person.

“Oh yes, it’s some ridiculous new religion of some sort that worships turtles in the mountains, from what I understand,” she explained, waving a hand in front of her face to emphasize how indifferent she felt about the group. “I have to say, it’s all terribly confusing and I don’t see why he was so taken with it.”

“Oh, I… I’m very sorry,” you responded, more out of politeness than anything. If he ran away, why was Mary sent to get him, of all people? What about the rest of the family? Mary seemed determined, but you hadn’t actually seen her do anything to look for her brother. Was there no one better suited for the job? “Did he say anything to you before he left? About why he was joining?”

She sighed and stood from the rocking chair to pace over to the porch railing, leaving the chair rocking lightly in her wake. She leaned on the rail and gazed further into the horizon. “Oh, he blames my father for it, of course,” she explained in exasperation, again waving her hand in front of her as if to brush away the very notion. “The man can be overbearing, yes, but I know he only wants what’s best for us. I just hope Jamie will see that soon.”

“I’m... sure he will,” you honestly didn’t know what else to say in the situation. Mary looked to be in her late twenties or early thirties, so was Jamie not also an adult? Was he not allowed to make his own decisions? To live his own life? If that was the case, you honestly wouldn’t blame him for running away. 

Before you could let the silence become awkward, Mary continued, “If not, well, I’ve seen some old acquaintances around town. My childhood love, before Barry, used to run with a rather rough crowd of outlaws and... degenerates, so I suppose I may be able to ask them for help if it comes to it.” Seemingly eager to change the subject, she turned to face you, leaning against the porch railing and holding her coffee in both hands.  “In the meantime, may I ask you something as well? If it’s not too personal?”

You paused before answering and glanced at Ben. He was still chasing the poor cat around the yard. “Sure, I suppose. If it’s not too personal…” You leaned against the wall, took the last sip of coffee in your cup and looked at her, awaiting her question.

Mary had also glanced back to Ben before continuing, leaning slightly in your direction. “Your husband? Ben's father, I mean. If I can ask, where is he?” she asked, quietly, in case Ben should not hear.

That was a surprising relief. Yes, you missed Andrew, and yes it still hurt to think about losing him, but you never would hide what happened or how much you had loved him. “Oh. He…he passed shortly after Ben was born. It was a bad flu that took a turn for the worse all of a sudden. We got some medicine, thought he was getting better and then… and then he was gone. Overnight,” you revealed, unable to look in her eyes as you spoke. The pity that always overcame people when you spoke about Andrew was sometimes too much to bear. You swallowed and took a deep breath, burying the lump that inevitably formed in your throat each time you had to retell the story.

Mary quickly moved from the railing and sat back in her chair, reaching for your hand. “Oh my, I am so sorry! That must have been awful,” she replied. You allowed her to grasp your free hand, still refusing to look into her eyes. 

You had heard the same rehearsed response hundreds of times - from friends, family, neighbors. Everyone had been curious at first, after his passing. People you had barely known came by, more out of curiosity than care, and had quickly offered you their well-wishes before digging for the gossip. They almost always left feeling disappointed and guilty. This type of death, suddenly from a common illness, was not uncommon in this area, and left very little to be gossiped about.

You cleared your throat and turned your focus toward Ben, wanting something to distract you from the conversation that you had had so many times before. “It was. It still is, actually, but... I think you get used to carrying it with you after a while,” you explained, a bittersweet smile gracing your features. Outside in the yard, Ben had finally caught the cat and had wrestled it into his lap. Sensing the futility of trying to escape, it had given in and was now purring as he stroked its fur and whispered to it. “But… he gave me almost five amazing years, and he gave me Ben, and I… I honestly couldn’t ask for more.”

If you had looked, you would have seen Mary sporting the same bittersweet, longing smile that you wore. “Ben is a wonderful boy, I’m sure your husband would be proud,” she responded, her voice quieter and sadder than most peoples’ usually are at this point in the conversation.

“Thank you, I think so too.”

The two of you sat in silence for a moment, both of your coffee cups emptied, and the bubbles from the washbasin having slowly receded into the grimy water. The birds chirped in the crisp spring air and a few clouds drifted by overhead. A light breeze came in from the West, making your skirts sway lightly as you sat on the porch. It was nice, peaceful.

After a few minutes of contented silence, Mary spoke, “My husband also passed away a few years ago. Pneumonia,” she explained, her voice barely above a whisper. “Even before that I lost my first love, but in a very different way. And now I may have gone and lost Jamie too. It’s… it’s never easy, and I wish no one had to suffer like that.”

“No one deserves to,” you agreed solemnly, surprised by your companion’s revelation. It was strange to have something in common with Mary Linton, but you wouldn’t complain. It was nice to have someone who understood.

Once again, silence overtook the two of you, as you sat on the porch and lost yourselves in memories. The peaceful morning bled slowly into the early afternoon, the birdsongs fading away, the sun shining high in the sky. Ben had long since lost track of the cat and was laying on his back in the grass, making pictures out of clouds. After a while, Mary opened up her book and began to read silently, rocking back and forth in the chair, and you returned to the laundry. 

Only a few hours later, you stood in clean clothes in the back of Saint’s Hotel, getting a necessary breath of fresh air and listening closely for any new customers. In the last hour, you had already cleaned the upstairs rooms, readying any empty ones for new patrons. Unfortunately, this task also included cleaning the room of Mr. Presley in 2A, which the other women refused to touch unless specifically told to do so. After a thorough scrubbing and airing out, you had managed to get most of the stink from the room for the time being, but you dreaded the day he left. Room 2A may never again be suited for a new patron once the poor man moves out.

You stood, taking in deep breaths of the fresh country air, until you heard the front door of the hotel open and close. A few words were exchanged between your boss and a new patron, before your name was called. “Please fill a hot bath! Our customer will be in his room until it’s ready.”

With a sigh, you heaved yourself off the stack of logs you had been leaning against and went to fetch a pail of water from the well. The water was ice cold from the mountain runoff, and would surely take some time to heat, so you went ahead and started the coals in the bath room as soon as you were back inside.

After a half an hour of trudging back and forth with pails of water - one of your least favorite parts of the job - you called to your boss to tell him the bath was ready. A pair of freshly laundered towels and a bar of soap on a chair in the room finished the job, and you headed outside to take a quick break. 

As was custom, you were to listen for the patron to enter the bath room, wait about 5 minutes for them to undress, and then knock on the door and offer your services. 

Valentine, being a livestock and trade town, rarely had families or women passing through for baths, so rest assured you were usually invited by the lonely men in without hesitation. By and large, the men were respectful, if a little flirtatious, and never tried anything uncouth. Of course, occasionally men would come in drunk, or were just plain bastards sober, and that would lead you to deny your devices and call for your boss to toss them out. Thankfully, your boss never batted an eye when you brought him in to sort things out - possibly out of respect for his long-standing employees, but more likely because there was no other hotel in town and he already had their money. Regardless, you were grateful that he looked after you, even if his motivations may have been somewhat questionable.

You heard the bath room door squeak as it shut and began your countdown, digging out any dirt from under your nails just in case you were needed. After about five minutes had passed, you squared your shoulders and knocked lightly on the door. “Need any help in there?”

Immediately, the response came, and the voice was unexpectedly familiar. “Shoa, why not?”

You tried your best to hide the surprised smile on your face, and pushed the door slowly open. The room was dimmed, curtains closed and lit by only a few candles, and smelled strongly of soap and lavender. Even through the dim light and the fog from the hot bathwater, you recognized the handsome face of the man who sat, naked, in the tub before you. “Well hello again, Mountain Man,” you said with a smirk, rolling up your sleeves.

At first, he seemed shocked, but quickly let out one of those loud barks of a laugh as he had done at your previous meetings. “Ha! I just can’t seem to shake you, can I?”

With a friendly smile, you moved to sit on the stool next to the tub. “Seems so,” you responded, reaching into the soapy water to wet your hands. A slight nervous lump formed in your throat as you looked him over. Each time you saw him, he’d somehow become more and more handsome. Granted, the first time, you were exhausted and were in a dimly lit saloon, the second time he was covered in mud, and now… now he was stark naked and dripping wet in a bathtub, directly in front of you. 

Your perception may have been slightly biased. 

Arthur cleared his throat, making you jump. Had you been staring? “Didn’t know you worked here,” he teased, looking you directly in the eye. He really had to stop doing that. “May have to stop by more often.” He tore his eyes away from yours and then drew them obviously up and down your body as he spoke, stopping momentarily on your cleavage, which was peeking out through the top of your blouse.

A blush crept to your face, and you were immediately thankful that the room was not well-lit. He could stop by every day for free if he kept looking at you like that. Of course, you couldn’t say that out loud, your boss would kill you. Instead, you chuckled and said, “Please do, I can use the extra cash.”

Not missing a beat, Arthur responded with a smirk, “Thought you was expensive?”

Cute. You let out a small chuckle and reached for the bar of soap at the edge of the tub. “Too expensive, I suppose. Or maybe I’m just too choosy,” you managed with a wink, before turning him away from you so you could wash the top of his head. Finally, those eyes weren’t on you and you could actually think again.

He groaned lightly as you massaged soap into his hair. “So that’s why you've been runnin’ off on me?”

That earned him an earnest laugh. “Running off? Oh, please! You’re easily one of the better men that’s come through this town in a long time,” you told him, lightly smacking the top of his head before moving down to his shoulders. His muscular, broad, tanned, perfect shoulders. “Especially that Tommy…” you continued, having heard about his fight with the man after you had left the bar the other night.

“I guess you heard about that?” he chucked awkwardly, tilting his head back slightly to look up at you. 

Another laugh. He was obviously not from a small town, otherwise he would know exactly how fast gossip can travel. Not to mention that Tommy was completely black and blue, and ranting about some drunken bastard the next time you had seen him in town. “‘Course I heard! Maybe 100 people live in this town and half of them were in the Saloon the other night,” you chided, still massaging his shoulders. “You can’t keep a secret for long around here, Mountain Man.”

He laughed again, that barking laugh that started in his belly and made him throw his head back with a smile. You liked it.  “Obviously,” he grinned up at you for a second before turning away. “Though, if I’m one of the best ‘round here, I’d hate to see the other bastards that pass through.”

You narrowed your eyes, confused. Was that a joke? Sure, he seemed a bit rough around the edges, but no more than the other men who usually passed through here. And you wouldn’t even begin to start on how much more attractive he was than the rest of them.

Regardless, you decided to try your best to change the subject, it seems to have been a bit of a sore spot for some reason. “It’s not all that many, to be honest,” you told him, moving to wash his left arm. The muscles lightly twitched under your touch, and you couldn’t help relishing the feel of his skin under your fingers. “Occasionally we get some groups of men from out in New Austin or near Strawberry looking for work, I guess that’s where you’re coming from?”

He cleared his throat. “Shoa,” he confirmed, still looking away from you. “We was workin’ at a factory ‘n it was shut down. Lookin’ for something new now. Didn’t wanna come this far east, but there ain’t many options anymore.”

You nodded in understanding. Plenty of factories up north had recently shut down, or replaced their workers with newfangled machines. “I hear that Cornwall Tar is hiring,” you mentioned, only half joking. Cornwall was a notoriously awful boss, who underpaid and overworked his employees as much as possible, but a job was a job. “If you’re willing to work for below average and ungodly hours.”

Another loud, barking laugh. You were growing rather fond of it. “Low pay and high hours I can handle,” he responded, finally turning his head to look at you again, “just not for Cornwall.”

“Got a history?” you joked, not at all expecting a serious answer. Everyone knew about Cornwall’s awful business. No one actually wanted to work for him, even without a history.

“Somethin’ like that,” came Arthur’s mumbled response, surprising you. So he actually did know Cornwall? Maybe the man had owned the factory Arthur used to work at? “In the meantime we’re gettin by with the occasional bounty and whatever other labor we can find.”

“We? You and your two friends from the saloon, right?” you asked, dipping your hands in the water to gather more suds. Just a few inches closer and you would be able to feel his chest. Somehow, you managed to resist the urge, and proceeded to wash his calf, which honestly may have been just as nice.

“Yeah, there are a few more of us around too,” he explained, shifting position in the tub and causing the water to splash about slightly. He leaned his head against the back rim and groaned as you massaged his aching muscles. “They’re my… co-workers.Though really they’re almost family at this point.”

“You didn’t part ways when the factory shut down?” It was an innocent enough question. You’ve had groups of laid-off workers come through before, though usually by the time they had hit Valentine the group was at about a quarter its original size. People found other jobs along the way. People got sick. People just left. That’s how it went.

“Nah, we’ve been workin together too long to give up on each other now. Loyalty’s always been important to us. Course, we lost a few along the way, but that’s the way it is I s’pose,” he continued. It was interesting to say the least. You had seen about twenty or so new faces in the past week, all coming from the direction of Emerald Ranch. If that were his group, that would be a surprising amount of people who’ve stayed together. 

Suddenly, something Mary had mentioned that morning came back to you: she had seen some acquaintances of her ex-love around town. It couldn’t possibly be the same group of people, that would mean that Arthur rode with a bad crowd, as she had described. You glanced him up and down again. He had his head leaned back, eyes closed, and hair dripping on the wooden floor below. At that moment he looked serene, peaceful. Definitely not the kind of man who ran with a gang of outlaws and degenerates, as she had described.

After a few more moments of silence, Arthur opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling, contemplative. “‘n what keeps a woman like you in Valentine? Seems like somewhere else might have more to offer,” he finally asked.

You chuckled, having been asking the same question yourself since Andrew had died. “Oh most definitely,” was your response. “But this is where my husband grew up and where my son was born. I’ve been here long enough that Ben and I know everyone in town and, well, it’s been hard to leave. Been thinkin about it for a while, but I can’t bear to part with it. As dirty and backwards as this place may be.”

This seemed to peak his interest. He sat up straighter in the tub and brought his leg back in to soak. “Your husband, right. That the boah’s pa?” he asked, looking at you and lifting his other arm out of the water - your cue to move to the other side of the tub.

You feigned offense at his question, but didn’t blame him. It’s not like Andrew was around to introduce himself. “Of course! What kind of woman do you take me for, Mountain Man?” you teased, flicking a few droplets of the cooling water into his face.

As a reflex, one of his large hands came up to shield his face from your attack. “Hey!” he shouted through a laugh. “Now, that’s not what I meant! I just seen you at the cemetery after your boah said you was going to visit his pa. Didn’t want to assume.” His laughter had died down by the end of the sentence as he glanced at you out of the corner of his eye.

You looked at your feet, having dragged the stool to the other side of the bath and sat down. Under normal circumstances, you would let the conversation die there. No need to continue, no need for explanations. But, for some reason, with Arthur, a man who is essentially a stranger, you wanted to let him know. “Oh. Well, yeah, that was his pa,” you began, reaching into the water and gathering some of the remaining suds to begin washing his other arm. “He passed a few years ago. He got pretty sick for a week or so, and then right when we thought he was getting better he was just… gone. All of a sudden. It…” you took a breath to steady yourself before you continued. “It was right after Ben was born, actually. Poor kid doesn’t even remember him.”

Arthur cleared his throat and looked away from you. “I’m real sorry. Shouldn’ve brought it up.”

You wish he hadn’t. You wish he could have just stayed flirty and playful. You wish he hadn’t unintentionally brought your mood down. It wasn’t his fault, but you still wished it hadn’t happened. “It’s fine,” you told him, quietly. “You didn’t know.”

You didn’t know how to continue. There was no way you could think of to cut through the awkward silence that followed. So, you finished up his bath with practiced efficiency, no longer taking the time to inwardly fawn over his muscled arms and calves. It only took a few more minutes until you had finished up - a lot sooner than you would have preferred under other circumstances. “Well, that should do it then,” you said quietly, clearing your throat and wiping your wet hands on your skirt. “You’re squeaky clean, Mountain Man.”

He coughed out a short, “Thanks,” as you stood to leave the room. 

As soon as the door creaked shut, you practically ran out the back door, desperately in need of fresh air. You heaved yourself up to sit on top of the small stack of logs at the back of the house, wishing you had a drink as tears formed in the corners of your eyes. It was strange, really, talking about Andrew with him. You had talked with people about your late husband hundreds of times, and it always made you sad, but this time was different. It made you feel so overwhelmed and, somehow, raw. Talking to Arthur, a man you hardly knew, about your husband, confirming that Andrew was gone, it seemed wrong and you couldn’t pinpoint why. 

Maybe you were just tired? Maybe it was because, between Arthur and Mary, you had talked about him more today than usual? Maybe you could see yourself beginning to move on, and you felt guilty?

After a good amount of time had passed, when you were certain Arthur had left the bath and gone up to his room, you re-entered the hotel and made your way back into the bath room to clean up. Even after nearly a half an hour, the scent of soap and lavender hung thick in the air. You quickly opened the curtains and the windows to air out the humid room and let in the afternoon sunlight. 

As soon as the light filtered in the room, highlighting the wisps of steam still hanging about, you noticed a folded piece of paper sitting on the stool by the tub. Gingerly, you picked it up and ran your fingers over the handwritten letters on the front. Your name. Upon unfolding it, ten dollars fell to the floor, and you saw a drawing of a small daisy in the upper right hand corner of the paper.

Below the daisy was a note, beginning with your name.

I’m real sorry about bringing up your husband. I know losing someone you love never really goes away, and I can see that talking about him hurt. Can’t really make up for that, but I hope a nice dinner from the saloon today for you and the boy will help out just a little.

Thank you for the best cleaning I’ve had in years. I hope we can really meet for a drink sometime. 

Yours, Arthur

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #403

“ashes to ashes, watch me disappear”

If given the opportunity, would you like to star in a musical? Definitely not. I don't like musicals. Name one person you’d take a bullet for: There's honestly a lot, but Mom immediately came to mind. Any posters of a band on your bedroom wall? Yeah: Metallica and Marilyn Manson currently. I want lots more, especially an Ozzy one. Do you think you’ve already met your soulmate? I don't believe in soulmates. Do you share your bedroom with anyone? No, unless you include my cat and snake. Is your favorite color yellow? No, it's actually one of my least favorites. Were you born in a hospital? I was. Do you know the name of the person that delivered you? No, but Mom does. I think he delivered me and my two sisters, and I know Mom has seen him since for other reasons. Was your birth recorded? God no. Good call, Mom. Did you eat a peach this week? Would you believe me if I told you I had a small bit of peach pie for my sister's birthday? For some reason, I just really wanted to try some. It was okay, but the aftertaste sucked. Are you leaving the house tomorrow? Yes, for TMS therapy. Every weekday. Do you enjoy romantic movies, even when they’re cliche? I honestly do. If you could get free vocal lessons would you take them? Probably not. I don't like singing in front of anyone, and it's not like I wanna get anywhere with my singing, so. Is your mother diabetic? She is. Are you? No. Ever sang someone to sleep? No. Who do you stalk the most through Facebook? Nobody. Have you ever deleted your Facebook, then brought it back? No. What is your main responsibility each day? Be sure to take my medications. Do you feel like you fulfill those responsibilities? Yeah. There are rare mornings where I forget, but I almost always remember. I don't fw skipping out on meds that keep my mental health stable. When was the last time you used spray paint? Good question. Do you know the middle name of the last person you kissed? Yep. Who is the friendliest person you know? My mom, probably. Something that annoys you about summer: THE HEAT. THE HUMIDITY. UGH. Something that annoys you about winter: Hm. That's hard to say, given I love winter. I guess the fact it doesn't snow enough here. Are the doors of your fridge side by side or on top of one another? Side-by-side. If you’ve moved out of the house you were born in, do you know the people who live in that house now? Nope. Have you ever cried in a movie theater? Not sobbed or anything, but I've definitely teared up and gotten the sniffles because of multiple movies. Do you read comic books? No. Do you force your way into conversations in which you are not involved? No. Have you ever seriously pretended to be clinically insane? I didn't need to pretend; I'm pretty damn sure I was for a while. Might I add that it's EXTREMELY inconsiderate to pretend you're insane, btw. Insanity is not "cool." It's not "funny." It's not "edgy." It's a serious, confusing, heart-wrenching issue that can ruin lives. Do you know anyone with a stutter? Yes, myself included when I'm even mildly nervous. And sometimes just randomly. With a lisp? I don't believe so. What was the last board game you played? The Disney version of "Pretty Pretty Princess" w/ my niece and even my nephew, even though his sexist-ass dad didn't want him to. Like let your kid have some fun with his sister and aunt, goddamn. They had a blast. It was Aubree's birthday present from me, so I am SO glad she loved it. Did you win? Ha ha, no, I always let Aubree or Ryder win. I came super close once, but I let the kids bend the rules a bit. They don't like losing, and even though they definitely need to understand that just happens and is totally fine for it to, I wasn't about to be the one to make them sad about it. When was the last time you tried to speak with an accent? OH MY LAAAAAWWWWWWD. Also at Aubree's b-day party, at one point, I spoke in a snobbish British accent while I was winning at the aforementioned game. Ryder asked, "Why are you speaking Spanish?", and I fuckin DIED. Have you ever made up a word before? Yeah, I know at least a few instances for fantasy animals in writing. When was the last time you went to a museum? A couple summers ago when my brother and his son visited, we went to a science museum. My nephew was sooooo into it. Do you have a nice yard? If so, do you spend a lot of time outside in it? If not, where do you go when you want to relax outdoors on nice days? Our front and back yards are both small and honestly very boring. The grass is a pretty green, but that's the only nice thing about it. I don't go to sit outside here on any day. Do your parents enjoy any of the things that you enjoy? Do you bond over these things? My parents and I have very similar music tastes, so there's that. I also didn't know for the longest time that Mom likes to write, which I sure as hell do, too! She doesn't really write anymore though, and she's self-conscious of it anyway, like I am. She and I also love a lot of the same shows. What is the movie that you have waited the longest for/which film do you remember anticipating the most/are still anticipating? I think The Incredibles 2. I aaaalways wanted to know what happened after the end of the first film. Do you have any ideas for a story or movie you’re planning to write or you’d write if you had the time/had the talent? Please share a synopsis! I genuinely think some RP I've written is series-worthy, but I don't feel like re-writing the YEARS of RP into a book format, and I sincerely worry that the ridiculously dark parts could inspire people like serial killers and cause A LOT of controversy, crime-blaming, and just general hate. I don't want to be involved in that. What is something that an interested guy/girl could comment about you, that would make you instantly open to them (e.g., “That book you’re reading is from my favorite author”)? Compliment my Markiplier tattoo, obviously knowing it's a tribute to him, and we're essentially besties. Is there a person in your life (maybe barely) that you feel in constant competition with (even just in your imagination)? Maybe you feel they are consistently outshining you? Ugh... there's a local photographer that's much more successful than I am that I admittedly am very envious of. I swear to whatever god you may believe in that I mean it from a modest perspective, I really, really do, but I genuinely think my skills surpasses hers, and she's only more prevalent because photography REALLY is about who you know. She's talented, yes, but like... come on. If you are single, even if you are normally happily single, are there certain specific things you witness that make you wish you were in a relationship (e.g., people getting engaged)? I mean yeah. I miss cuddling, holding hands, kissing, just being cute together, and especially people getting engaged or having kids. It's such a trigger to me. Once upon a time, that's all I wanted with Jason. I wanted to be that beautiful couple that got married and had two or three loved-beyond-words children, but then he left so abruptly, and I feel like it was so brutally robbed from me. I don't want kids anymore like at all, but the point still stands that I felt like my dreams were just ripped away. Out of all your usernames for websites, which one is your favorite? Do you use it for more than one site? I use "Ozzkat" just about everywhere. Have you ever spent the whole day (or multiple days) just looking up one thing on the internet (e.g., videos of your favorite band, how-to videos, quizzes, etc.)? OHHHHHHHHHH YEAH. There have been a couple days or so where I was totally glued to looking up various tattoo designs, bingeing let's plays or conspiracy theory videos, etc. etc. If you ever think about getting married, what are some aspects of the wedding that you would like to see in a non-traditional manner (e.g., a different color dress or “partners” over “husband” and “wife”)? I WILL NOT get married in a church, first of all. I'm also not having the traditional vows, and I probably won't wear a white dress, but instead black. Salt & vinegar, barbecue, sour cream & onion, or cheddar? Ohhhh, I like all those options but barbecue. I think I've gotta go with sour cream & onion, though. Bow ties on guys, dorky or adorable? A D O R A B L E ! ! ! I think they're ordinarily geeky, but I mean, geeky is cute in my world. :^) Do you believe in demonic possession? How about ghosts? Angels? Angels, no. Spirits/ghosts, 100%. I don't exactly believe in demons, per se, but I do question if evil spirits can possess someone. What is one romantic movie that you enjoy enough to watch more than once? I've seen The Notebook numerous times. Name three countries you want to visit; why those three? South Africa to interact with meerkats at the KMP, somewhere up in Canada to see the Northern Lights, and Germany just because, really. I took German for four semesters, and the culture and all just interests me. Do you have a good luck charm? No, considering I don't believe they do jack. Do you use Skype to talk to your friends? Only Sara. Now that I have Discord semi-figured out now though, we'll probably use that for voice chatting. Are you allergic to any animals? I might be allergic to dogs. Do you usually spend your weekends out, or at home? I'm like... always at home. Do you think it’s wrong for people to say "retard/retarded" as an insult? Absofuckinglutely. Don't pull that shit when I'm around. Have you ever had to go to the police department? No. Have you ever lived through a hurricane? Plenty. Have you ever had a home-grown tomato? Yes, from my old friend's garden. We'd have delicious tomato, mayo, and bacon sandwiches. The only instance where I've enjoyed tomatoes. Have you ever held a real gun? The former friend I mentioned just before, her husband always carried a gun, and he just needed me to hold it for a sec for some reason I don't recall. I hated the feeling. Would you rather wear Converse or Vans? I like both, but I think I prefer Converse. Have you ever been called bipolar? Yes, because I clinically am. Have you ever made fun of a handicapped person? FUCK no. And like the "retarded" thing, don't you fucking DARE to do this in front of me. I WILL deck the shit out of you. Do you think it’s okay to have sex before marriage? Sure, as long as you're being safe and are very thorough in communication. Do you like to watch old sitcoms? I don't really watch TV as I say in like every survey it seems, but I do enjoy some old sitcoms I grew up watching with my mom, like The Nanny, The Golden Girls, The Munsters, etc. If asked, could you run a mile nonstop right now? Being completely serious, I don't even know if I CAN physically run right now. My legs are so incredibly weak, and I'm humiliatingly close to what my heaviest weight was back in 2016, so I can almost guarantee my knees would crumple if I tried. Do you wear those rubber wristbands? I used to. I don't really like bracelets nowadays. If a necklace/ring gives you green marks, do you still wear it? Nope. Have you ever driven an electric car? No. When was the last time you saw someone you went to high school with? Uhhhh idk. What breed was the last dog you saw? A fucking GOLIATH of a lab. I shit you not when I say my sister's roommate's dog Hudson is the size of a goddamn bear. How long have your parents been together (or how long were they together, if they no longer are): I wanna say they were together at the very least 20 years. What has been your most epic cooking failure? I once accidentally put something (I don't remember what) in the microwave for around 45 minutes I believe, and I walked away and completely forgot about it. I remembered a long while later, and safe to say, it wasn't edible, whatever it was, lmao. Have you ever been to Mexico? No. Have you ever had a parrot sit on your shoulder? No, but that'd be cool. Has anyone in your life ever treated you abusively? No. How long has it been since your last breakup? Somewhere around two years ago? My memory is so garbage nowadays. Can you concentrate well while listening to music, or do you find it distracting? It's distracting, usually. What’s something you’ve been struggling with lately? I've been pretty bad about drinking too much soda lately. :/

[lilietsblog]

A cat can be horribly injured by a car driving at jogging speed if it what, was sleeping in the middle of the road?

(It is important to check under the car for cats if it was outside before starting it, that IS a thing which people do)

A stray and a cat with consistent access to outdoors and indoors at will aren't the same. Cat doors save lives or something like that. Does this address your weather concerns?

Guns exist outside of America, sure. That doesn't bring them into contact with outdoor cats (until the Russian invasion, people did what they could when that happened. Our cats are with us)

There are no native domestic cat species, but cats have lived here for >1000 years... I think... let me google that... oh, it's about 4000 years actually. And they were working cats, rat catchers, not indoor pets. You think after 4000 years there's anything left that a single cat let outside in a rural area where people are still keeping working yard cats can do meaningful ecological damage to?

As for why...

Well, for example, right now I am living in the western part of Ukraien as a refugee, taking care of my grandma, our dog and three cats on my own because both my parents are in the army. ADHD, anxiety and depression combining forces are kicking my ass enough that I'm barely staying afloat with making sure I can feed everyone and keep everyoen and everything at least relatively clean.

(This is, by the way, greatly aided by letting cats outside so they can pee and poop there, reducing frequency at which I either have to take out cat litter urgently or start needing to clean up cat toilet around the house wherever they decide to branch out to)

I know the ~right-thinking~ (as per tumblr) thing to do in this situation is to personally entertain all the cats, play with them 24/7 and build them labirynths to run or whatever. Fact is, I cannot do that. If I don't let them outside they're going to start fighting, and with how much one of them dislikes the other two, that might well end badly.

(It's the oldest one, she was the only child for a while, then a neighbour's kid brought us a stray kitten she found in the stairwell - that was back when we lived in the city center, didn't let our cats outside there... anyway, we tried to give the kitten away but no-one wanted him so we kept him and she just had to live with that. Tensions were significantly reduced when we moved to the city outskirts and started letting them out so they could actually avoid each other during the day)

Meanwhile, they never go far away from the house to take more than three minutes or so to come when I'm calling them to dinner. Usually less.

(And meanwhile, the cat we'd brought up as fully indoor is a nervous wreck whenever she encounters strangers or other animals. It used to be worse, but she's goten better since we - oh snap - started letting our cats outside)

talking to outdoor cat defenders like

[yourdeepestfathoms]

Döden Går Tyst I Skogen

Word count: 4487

Prompt: “I’m going to die. I’m going to die with an absolute idiot!”

--------------

“I hope you guys had no other plans for this weekend because we’re going camping!”

Of course Cleves was the one to present this idea. She was the nature freak, after all (in a good way, of course).

It was just another day at the theater, another day of singing the same songs and dancing the same dances. Perhaps that’s why Cleves came up with this proposition in the first place; she could sense the dreariness coating the ten of them and knew they all needed a break.

“Camping?” Aragon said slowly. “Really?”

“Yes, really!” Cleves replied with natural enthusiasm. “Come on, we don’t have any shows this weekend. We need this. What’s a better way to unwind than be in the great outdoors?”

“Be inside where it’s safe?” Joan put in.

“It sounds good to me.” Anne said, talking over Joan, earning an annoyed huff from the girl, who promptly buries her face back into her sketchbook. “It gives me more of a reason not to do the dishes!”

“You’re still doing them,” Jane said, then smiled at Cleves. “That sounds like a wonderful idea. I don’t think I’ve ever gone camping before.”

“Think you can handle it, Miss Germaphobe?” Anne teased.

“Yes!” Jane barked, suddenly defensive. “It is nature! It’s probably cleaner out there than it is in here.”

“Poison ivy, poison oak, leprosy, hornets, rabies, murderers…” Joan began to rattle off the dangers of nature. “Fungal diseases, scorpions, bears…” She continues, but nobody pays attention after that.

“I think it’s a great idea!” Kitty piped up. “Can we take the dogs?”

“Yeah!” Cleves said excitedly. “This is gonna be amazing! You won’t regret it!”

And so, the plans were arranged.

After spending the three days in actual civilization, the gang packed up two cars with supplies Cleves had bought (again, nature freak) and drove off to the campsite the red queen knew about. 

They arrived a little after six. It took ten minutes to hike to the clearing, and then around another thirty minutes to unpack and get set up, but they were all eventually sitting on logs and chairs around the fire Kitty and Anne started, a task Jane had been hesitant about giving them.

“Let’s play a game!” Kitty said.

“Hippo,” Joan suggested.

She got several head tilts, but Cathy flashed a grin at her.

“We used to call it Hippo, but we got tired of people always asking, ‘Why’s it called Hippo?’” She laughed. “Nice OXENFREE reference, Jo. I got it.” She swung her head around to the others, missing Joan’s shy blush in reaction to what she said. “It’s like Truth or Dare, except it’s a little nicer because nobody has to chug a bottle of hot sauce or lick someone else’s butthole. You can ask anyone any question you want and they have to answer no matter what, but if someone can prove that they’re lying, they get to slap them for not telling the truth.”

The others nodded in understanding.

“I’ll go first to start us off,” Cathy said. “Jane- Would you ever be polygamous?”

Jane scrunched up her nose in bafflement at such a question why several others laughed loudly. Cathy merely shrugged at the look she was being given and then motioned for Jane to answer.

“No. No way.” Jane said. “I mean, if you’re into that, nifty, but one partner is hard enough to deal with for me.”

A few more snorts went through the group, but nobody made a move to slap Jane, meaning, as far as they all knew, she was telling the truth.

“My turn, right?” Jane asked.

“Yup,” Cathy nodded.

“Okay…” Jane looked around at everyone. “Anne!” The green queen perked up and waited excitedly. “If you woke up as the opposite gender, what’s the first thing you would do?”

“Masturbate.”

Laughter erupted through the clearing. Maria even tipped backwards off of the log she was sitting on and had to cling desperately to Bessie’s shirt, which nearly made the bassist come down with her.

“I’m crying!” Maggie howled, wiping a finger under her watering eyes.

“There was zero hesitation!” Cleves cried.

“Can I slap her just because?” Aragon asked. 

“I speak only the truth.” Anne smirked. “My turn now, and I choose...Bessie!”

There was a swell of intrigued murmurs. Bessie raised an eyebrow at Anne.

“Ever committed a crime?” Anne asked. 

“If the illegal downloading of over a thousand songs counts as a crime, then yes.” Bessie said nonchalantly. “And tax fraud.”

“What?” Aragon gaped, among many shocked reactions.

“Anna!” Bessie said, providing no context or explanation for her answer.

And so, the game went on. 

Darkness began to fall over the forest as evening turned to night. Rays of marigold and pink and orange slipped through the trees, bathing the clearing in the colors of twilight before serene, inky black settles in its place. Laughter and music filled the grove even as the moon rose up high in the silver-speckled sky. Hippo turned into Cards Against Humanity, then a forest dance party, and then just normal conversations with topics that would randomly whisk away with the wind. 

Maria was the first to turn in for the night at eleven. Cathy and Kitty followed thirty minutes later, until everyone had nestled into their respective tents. The sound of humming crickets and croaking frogs lulled them all into a peaceful sleep…

--

12:48

Saturday, November 12

That’s what the big, white letters and numbers at the top of Joan’s phone screen read when she pressed the power button. She squinted at the brightness, then shut it off to relieve her eyes of the stinging glow that blinded them. She set her phone aside and rolled over, finding that there was much more space than before. When she peeked out from under her heavy eyelids again, she saw that the sleeping that used to occupy Cleves, her tent roommate, was empty.

Probably using the bathroom, Joan thought, snuggling back up in the blanket she brought. However, for the life of her, she couldn’t drift back off. You’d think the silence outside would help, bit it didn’t. In fact, it made falling asleep even worse for that very reason- that it was silent. No chirping of night birds, no rustling of leaves in the wind, no croaking of frogs. Nothing.

Complete silence.

Joan sat up, rubbed her eyes, then crawled out of the tent. The fire had been reduced down to flickering embers, and the minimal glow they gave off revealed a bare perimeter around the site. When she checked, there was nobody in the other tents.

“Guys?”

No answer.

Joan grabbed one of the flashlights lying around and began scanning the area of the camping ground. There was nobody.  Not even the dogs they had brought along.

“Hello? Guys?”

She vaguely remembered them talking about going on a night hike hours earlier, so she stepped out of the fire’s light and started to search. She waved the flashlight around everywhere, calling out for her friends.

“Jane? Bessie? Catherine?” She shouted into the darkness. “Where’d you guys go? Anne?”

Nothing answered her.

Joan delved deeper into the woods. Fallen leaves and icy grass crunches underneath her feet. The darkness surrounded her like a malevolent entity. It seemed palpable, almost physical. She shivered as a cold whirlwind gusted around her, her pajamas providing little to no protection from the wind. She regretted not grabbing her coat, but she hadn’t been expecting it to take this long.

“They could have at least told me where they were going.” She grumbled, “Or when they would get back. Or when they left because this is ridiculous!”

A branch snapped loudly from behind. Joan whirled around to see nobody.

“Guys?”

Bushes rustled nearby.

“Guys, this isn’t funny anymore!” She yelled.

There were more snaps and crackles that seemed to come from every direction. A crash sounded from a few yards away, like someone had taken a big log and threw it to the ground with as much force as possible. Joan thought she heard laughter coming from in the trees. She’s spinning around in rapid circles, shining her flashlight everywhere.

Then, a scream. 

Something lunged out from the underbrush.

Joan shrieked in pure terror and fell backwards, becoming paralyzed with fear. She braced her arms over her head. The laughter is back. She peeks out and her heart sinks.

“Oh man, you should have seen your face, Joan!”

“You...you prick!!”

Kitty jumped out of the way when the pianist flung a stick at her. She doubled over, giggling and trying to catch her breath.

“That wasn’t funny!”

“Sorry, sorry, okay! It was just too good!”

She hauled Joan up to her feet, despite the nasty glare she was getting.

“So all of that was you?”

Kitty nodded, grinning widely and wiping her eyes.

“God, you are so annoying. You put way too much effort into that!” Joan growled, rolling her eyes. “That didn’t sound like you up in the trees. Come on, let’s hear you do that voice again.”

Kitty gave her a confused look.

“What?”

“The laughter. In the trees. Do it again.”

“What are you talking about? I just made all those rustling noises. I never climbed a tree.”

Joan was awful at telling when people were lying, but something inside of her told her that Kitty was telling the truth. She fidgeted nervously.

“It must have just been the wind then.” She said, despite how painfully cliché that sounded. “Let’s-let’s just get back to the camp.”

She and Kitty began walking through the woods. 

“So, was everyone in on the joke?”

Kitty shook her head. “Nope. Just me.” She said, “We were heading back from the hike and I heard you yelling, so I decided to give you a little scare.”

“Which was so nice of you.” Joan deadpanned. She hated having to walk alone with Kitty of all people; it was so awkward! And it only got worse when it became evident that they had no idea where they were going.

“Shouldn’t we have found the clearing by now?” Joan asked anxiously.

“Calm down,” Kitty said, as if she weren’t a big scaredy cat herself. “We’ll get there.”

Joan gave her an unconvinced look, but kept walking because every other direction didn’t look any more helpful than the one they were going on. She pointed her flashlight straight ahead, but it seemed like the light wasn’t as strong as it had been before, like the shadows were devouring the length of the white beam and leaving it dimmed and short. 

Their hike was spent mostly in silence, aside from all the forest noises, which had finally returned. Or, perhaps they’ve always been there. It gets hard to tell after a while.

The two of them duck under brittle, reaching branches and coils of thorns until they break through the thicket and into a small clearing where a cottage as old as time itself sat. It’s swathed by tendrils of ivy climbing their way towards the roof and splotched with patches of emerald green moss. It’s a chalk color, black peppering along its breast. The windows are a deep brown, shoddy paint chipping along the frames’ lips and brow, the very age of the cottage showing in its deterioration. Strings of small bones and clumps of fur and feathers dangle from branches and carvings of snakes with gemstone eyes guard the trees around the property.

And—

There’s light coming from inside.

It’s barely there. Just the occasional flicker, a warm orange seeping through the windows and bathing the frosted, overgrown grass that sits along the ground against the wall of the cottage outside. 

Kitty furrowed her brows, then glanced at Joan, who had her head tilted slightly in confusion. She’s looking at the house as if she’s expecting it to start talking and give her answers of its history.

“We definitely didn’t go the right way.” Kitty said helpfully, earning a glower from Joan. 

“You think?”

Cautiously, they make their way up to the front door, a wide brown-oak thing, with a cut-out panel for a small, cracked glass window. As Joan is pushing down the rusted grey handle, Kitty swore she saw one of the snakes with ruby eyes turn its head to watch them. She instinctively latched onto Joan, who jumped and then shrugged her off.

“Let go,” Joan hissed.

“Sorry,” Kitty said softly. “I thought I saw something.”

Joan frowned and scanned the trees circling the house and then stepped inside, motioning for Kitty to come with her.

“This isn’t trespassing, right? Shouldn’t we have knocked first?” Kitty said, looking around the musty interior.

“Maybe,” Joan said. “But we’re inside now. Oh well. Maybe the person who lives here can help us.”

She shines her flashlight around, revealing racks and shelves of various animal bones and furs. In fact, the entire place seemed to be either decorated by remains or wood carvings.

“What’s that thing where people are into collecting animal skeletons?” Kitty asked quietly.

“Vulture culture,” Joan replied.

“Ah,” Kitty nodded. She took her phone out of her pocket; the bedazzled, hot pink case glittered slightly in the flashlight’s glow. “Well, I’m going to go back outside and try to get some bars to call Jane.”

“What time is it?” Joan asked before she did so.

“It’s two in the morning.” Kitty answered.

The front door remained open for Joan’s own sense of safety and so the sparse moonlight could leak inside. She made the quick trek through the living room, which was adorned with more fur and bones, and made it to a short hallway. She opened a door on the right, which led to a musty-smelling room overgrown with fungus and plant life. She was about to leave and check if the other door was the one where they had seen the light, when she noticed a boot sticking out from behind the bed.

She believed she may have just found the owner of the cabin.

It was a man. Or, at least, Joan assumed it was a man from whatever clothes were left upon the skeleton. She guessed he probably died from a heart attack or something, which would have been a terrible way to go, since he had clearly been all alone.

Just then, the sound of the front door slamming shut jarred Joan out of her inspection. She jumped, whirled around, and opened her mouth to snap at Kitty for doing that, even though she specifically wanted to keep the door open, but something told her not to. The words caught in her mouth and her jaw remained agape for a moment as she listened.

There was a crack of wood from the hallway.

Someone was in the cabin with her.

“Hello?” Called a voice far too raspy and deep to be Kitty’s. It almost sounded like an old man’s. “Anybody in here? I need help!”

Joan backed up against the wall as quietly as she could, not daring to reply.

“Hello?” The man said again, this time with far more desperation. 

The door pushed open slowly, but Joan was still hidden behind it from the way it came out. However, she could still see around the frame and watched as the man came inside, crawling on all fours with its inhumanly long limbs. The skin was wrinkled, molted, and sickly pale with smears of dark red and brown. It was incredibly thin and completely bald, but had scratches and pock marks littering its head. Its bones pressed grossly up against its taut flesh as it climbed onto the bed, grappling on with grotesquely disjointed hands and feet that almost looked like a gibbon’s. It looked down at the skeleton, then, in the gravelly voice, said, “I need help!”

Joan inhaled sharply and the thing snapped its head around to her. Its black, eyeless sockets drilled deep into her soul.

--

“Come on,” Kitty muttered as she watched a text to Jane try to send for the third time. She sighed heavily in annoyance, but that feeling was quickly whisked away by a jolt of fear when the door slammed shut behind her. She jumped and spun around, then narrowed her eyes at the doorway. “Wow. I was barely even being loud. But I expect no less from the MD who gets mad at every little thing!”

She turned away, not wanting to have her back to all the snakes. She continued to try and send a text until the door behind her suddenly swung open loudly and Joan came sprinting out.

“Kat!!” Joan yelled. “Run!”

“What?!”

Joan grabbed her arm as she ran by, pulling her along. She quickly fell into pace, and the two of them raced through the underbrush, getting whipped by ivy and branches and thorns as they went along. They stopped, eventually, to catch their breath. 

“What’s wrong?!” Kitty exclaimed through pants.

“There’s...someone out here with us.” Joan said bluntly with a wince. “Not one of our friends. Just please tell me you got a hold of Jane and know where to go.”

“No,” Kitty shook her head. “Wait- what do you mean ‘someone’?”

Joan began walking again. “I-I don’t know, honestly. Someone came into the house or was already inside, I’m not sure, but I was someone. Or something…”

Kitty swallowed thickly. At first she had been thinking Joan was just messing with her to get revenge for earlier, but Joan looked genuinely terrified. She kept looking over her shoulders and shining her flashlight around everywhere and anxiously fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. Something had really frightened her.

“Like...a man?”

“I don’t know!” Joan said. “I- I can’t describe it. You would have to see it to know what I mean.” She fell into a moment of nervous silence. “I just want to get out of these stupid woods…”

“Me too,” Kitty agreed. “Anything is better than this.”

“Eh. I can think of a few things.”

“I just wished Jane was here…”

Joan set a hand on her shoulder. “Me too.”

Kitty smiled slightly, despite the circumstances. She looked back down at her phone to see that the message was still trying to send.

“Let me see,” Joan said and Kitty handed her phone as she spoke again, “KAT!!!”

Except it hadn’t come from beside her.

Kitty whirled around to see Joan running through the dark trees. Her face was ghostly pale and dotted with sweat along the brow. Her storm grey eyes were wide with peril. The words she screamed sent Kitty’s entire world come crashing down on top of her.

“THAT ISN’T ME!!”

Kitty turned in time to watch the thing at her side disappear into the underbrush. Her jaw fell open, her breath catching in her throat as she was seized by terror. She had let it touch her. It had slipped into her life so easily and she had no idea. 

What was it planning on doing if Joan hadn’t shown up?

“Kat, Kat, hey,” Joan is in front of her, shaking her shoulders frantically. She clearly didn’t know how to calm someone in the midst of a panic attack. “Listen, I know you’re freaked out, but we have to go.”

She grabbed Kitty by the wrist and began running. Kitty stumbled along behind her, but managed to keep a steady pace, even with her rising horror.

“Joan-” She choked out as they sprinted through the trees. “Joan, what the fuck?”

“I-I-I don’t know!” Joan cried. “One moment I was alone in the cabin and then the next, that thing is there! I-it knocked me out, I think, and took my- AHH!!”

Joan cut herself off with a cry of pain and the loud clanging of metal as she’s suddenly yanked to the ground. Kitty screamed, too, at the sudden outburst and skidded to a halt. In the dim moonlight, she can see Joan writhing on the ground, sobbing in obvious distress.

“Joan?” Kitty whispered fearfully. “What’s wrong?”

“S-something’s got me-” Joan rasped. “Something’s-” She howled loudly.

“Is it the thing?” Kitty asked, but her only answer is a sharp whine that morphs into a sob. Slowly, she turned on her phone, which had scratch marks engraved into the glass from the creature, and activated the flashlight app. She couldn’t tell if what she saw in the light was worse than the monster or not.

A bear trap. Clamped around Joan’s left leg, just above the ankle. Joan’s left hand gripped at the limb tightly, slightly over where the metallic teeth bared into her flesh. One sporadic tremor was all it took to send new currents of torture up her leg. And, this time, there was no stifling her tormented scream from ripping out of her throat. Now, both hands were clutching at the appendage, trying as the might to lessen the pain. Of course, it did little to no good.

“Oh god,” Kitty whispered. “Oh god, oh god, oh god…!” She was beginning to panic, spiraling all over again. Joan caught attention of this growing anxiety attack through her own haze.

“No!” She snapped. “You don’t GET to freak out! You don’t have this fucking thing attached to your leg! You need to be the strong one for once!” Her voice wavered treacherously. “Please-”

Kitty sniffled, but nodded. She knew Joan was right- someone had to keep their head on straight, and it would be much harder for the one caught in a bear trap to do that.

She knelt down beside Joan, her knees dipping into a pool of blood spreading out across the dirt. She reached out and cringed when her fingers squelched against the fabric of Joan’s pajama pants, warm liquid seeping through and almost immediately coating her hands. They were numb, quivering as she forced them to venture farther and nearer to the source of her companion’s agony.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit,” Joan muttered. “I’m going to die. I’m going to die with an absolute idiot! No offense.”

“None taken,” Kitty grunted  as she jammed her fingers through where she could, eliciting a sharp cry from Joan. 

“What the fuck?! WHAT THE FUCK?!” Joan yelled, writhing.

“I’m trying to get it off!” Kitty told her.

She attempted to pry the jaws of the artificial beast from Joan’s leg, but her arms were shaking too much and the torment that seized Joan’s body prevented her from using all her strength; all of it was quickly being stolen away in both of them. Before she could get the teeth more than an inch away, the slickness caused it to slip from her grasp and bite right back to where it was originally. Just like that, they were back at square one.

“M-maybe I can break it off?” Kitty stammered.

“Try,” Joan begged. She leaned back and laid down, clawing her hands at the dirt and ripping at the grass to try and cope with the waves of agony washing over her. Tears were falling freely from her eyes.

Kitty began to search the perimeter of the clearing, being mindful of other illegal traps laid out- bear traps, fox traps, snares, cages. She weaved around them carefully, scanning the ground until she found a few big and pointy rocks and some sturdy-looking sticks. She gathered them all, willing to try each of them until one worked.

“Listen,” Joan slurred as she made her way back over. “We both hate this. In fact, I hate it more because I’m the one with a bear trap on my leg. So-” Then, she went snow white.

“Joan?” Kitty said worriedly. “What’s wrong?”

“Kat, don’t move.” Joan whispered slowly. “I know we have our differences, but I need you to trust me. Whatever you do, don’t move.”

Kitty obeys, freezing in place. She held the rocks and sticks close to her chest, staring into Joan’s eyes and not daring to look at anything else. Bile was rising in her throat, not because of her mounting fear, but because of the sickly sweet smell of cadaverine emanating from the figure beside her.

“I can’t believe I finally found you both!” It said with Jane's voice. “I’ve been looking all over. I was so worried.”

A hand with long, spindly fingers comes up to rest on Kitty’s shoulder. Kitty squeezes her eyes shut, tears slowly rolling down her face as she barely suppressed a whimper.

“I was so worried.” It said again, using Anne’s voice.

Joan is perfectly still, not even feeling the pain of the bear trap anymore. She watches as the thing’s head twitches sporadically before finally stopping and staring directly at her, wearing Aragon’s face.

“You two know better than to run off like that.”

That’s when Kitty screamed. Unable to take it anymore, she darted left and ran for the trees. The thing went after her, and Joan could only lie there and watch as it lunged at her, latching on and throwing her to the ground, where it began shredding her face and burrowing into her back and peeling off her skin until she stopped screaming. Then, with the young queen’s flesh draped around its neck like a scarf, it crawled over to Joan. She didn’t move as it pressed its nails into her belly and grabbed a hold of the top of her face. She just cried until the Skinwalker stripped her head and she couldn’t cry anymore.

------

Kitty’s eyes snapped open- she’s barely able to breathe. Her hands immediately begin to feel all over her body- her face, her stomach, her leg. Then, she’s catapulting out of her tent, stumbling over it momentarily, and wrenching herself outside.

It was morning. Pale sunlight was filtering through the trees overhead. Birds were singing happily. Everyone seemed so calm, so at peace, while she stood breathing heavily and sweating. Jane looked at her worriedly.

“Are you alright, sweetheart?” She asked. “What’s wrong?”

“N- nothing…” Kitty said, spotting Joan sitting by the dying fire with her knees to her chest. “I’m fine.”

She walked over to Joan and sat beside her. The music director’s face is very grey.

“They didn’t believe me,” She whispered.

“What?’

Joan looked up at her. “I tried to tell them what happened and they didn’t believe me. They said it was a dream and it wasn’t real. But it couldn’t have been…” She shook her head and rested it back on her knees.

“Yeah…” Kitty said softly.

There was nothing to be done, however. They still had a day of camping, although nothing happened during the next night. That gave them both some reassurance, and they even started believing that it had been some crazy nightmare.

As everyone was driving home, Kitty felt a sting in her back and Joan felt a stab in her stomach. They exchanged fearful looks, then looked out the window and saw it standing between two trees, waving and wearing a horrid mix of their faces.

[edgewoodrp]

Birthday Bash || Outdoor Festivities

Date/Time: May 29th, 2020 8:00PM -- 1:00AM

Location: 315 Canterbury Cv, Castle Ridge -- The Outskirts

Participants: @caterinasingh, @charlottexkingsley, @darklighterxdemitri, @heatherpayne, @logancree, @maxinebeauchamp, @trevor-wells, @valeriebianchi, @xavier-bennett

Summary: In the backyard, the drinks are flowing and the party is in full swing as the games begin.

Trevor had parked a few blocks away, and by the time he'd made it to the house, the party was in full swing. Bypassing the front door-- he didnt know either of the hosts that well-- he instead walked up the side yard and into the back of the house, whistling under his breath. "Damn, that is one nice setup."

Demitri's hands were shoved in his pocket as he eyed the house. It was already becoming slightly chaotic but not in the way he enjoyed. People began to flush into the front doors and he slowly made his way to the back yard. He licked his lips as he glanced sideways, hearing someone speak. "I've seen better." He snorted as he leaned against a nearby tree.

Logan had noticed both woman were busy inside and greeting the rest of their guests. So for now, the vampire would continue to hold his drink and "wait" for his turn. Stepping outside, his ears picked up the comments made about the set up and a smirk formed on his lips at the slight remark. "Really? I'd have to agree the set up is nice. What would you have changed or added then?"

Trevor turned towards the voice that had answered him, and laughed in return as his dismissive attitude. "Oh yeah? Around here? I'm just saying its a pretty nice setup for an outdoor party. Not too frat-boy, not too wedding-shower." He shook his head and shrugged, the 6-pack he had tucked under his arm lifting in the motion. When another individual stepped beside him to his defense, Trevor gestured at him. "See? Thank you!"

"I never said around here." Demitri said as he folded his arms across his chest. "All I'm saying is that it could have been better, had they hired some other person." Demitri honestly could care less. He wasn't someone that really enjoyed the mundane parties anymore. But he could make small talk. "I mean. These games, for start." He motioned towards the games. "I think there should be more adult friendly games."

Trevor laughed before realizing it wasn't meant as a joke. "'Adult-friendly' games? Do you mean like Cards Against Humanity or...?" Shaking his head he shrugged again. "I guess I wouldn't know, I've lived here my whole life." Taking a beer out of the 6-pack, he held out the rest as an offer. "Where are you from?"

Logan held his drink up indicating he was good. The vamps eyes narrowed at Demitri and his tone wondering why would he come to such an event with that attitude. He might just be that way regardless. Biting his laughter back, he said, "The night is young mate, there might be more to these games once the host gets around to explaining them."

"Yeah sure. Cards against humanity." Demitri snorted and shook his head. Humans and their fucking card games. He thought to himself. "How unfortunate." He muttered. Demitri's eyebrows rose at the question, a wry smile forming on his lips. "You need someone to explain the games to you?" Demitri asked, eyeing the other male. "How old are you, Logan?" He teased the other with a smile. He knew he wasn't a human. He could tell. "I'm from hell." He said, chuckling lowly as he glanced between the two to see their reaction.

Chuckling also, Logan gave an innocent shrug. "I am only saying-there could be more to the game then the obvious. But, I suppose we will find out all about it later. I may be wrong." Taking a sip of his drink, his eyes narrowed still at the stranger but the smirk never left. "I'm 33, give or take." The vampire glanced at Trevor and then sarcastically laughing to Demitri, "Really? There's more of you? How unfortunate."

"I'm just saying, I have no idea what you mean by 'Adult games' man," Trevor shook his head, opening the beer in his hand and taking a sip. A sip that he almost spit out at the response to his question. Trevor turned and locked eyes with the other man, eyebrows raised in a face of 'thats definitely a normal response to that question', before turning back. "Hell, huh. That's in Minnesota, right?"

Heather saw some women hanging around in the kitchen through the window, so she made her way around back instead. She didnt wanna be part of whatever gender conforming nonsense was happening in there. She promised herself  that she would make it around to say hi to Cat sometime: she was after all who had bugged Heather to come to a party for people she barely knew. She made her way through the back gate and towards a table to set down the beer she had brought. Then she caught sight of who she was with. Two of the most suspicious men in town and someone she didnt recognize. "Fuck, how did you guys get invited to this? I thought Cat had good taste."

Demitri glanced towards Logan. "You seem to be making these games way more complicated in your head." He said and then his eyes flickered to the other male. "You're not serious." His voice was low and dull. Man, people were so fucking dumb. "Sure." He muttered then went to say something else but closed his lips when he noticed someone else moving to the outside. "Who said we got invited?" He asked, giving Heather a toothy grin.

Eventually, Charlotte found her way to the backyard. "Hey kids, we've got lots of booze chilling in the fridge--does anyone need anything? Or want anything put in the fridge?" Lingering by the s'more bar, she snagged a marshmallow while she waited for answers.

Trevor sidestepped to allow the newcomer, a woman he didn't recognize but who clearly knew the other two, join their little circle by the fire. "There were invites? I just followed the crowd." He turned at the sound of a familiar voice, feeling the familiar catch in his stomach when he recognized Charlotte. "I'm good, thanks," he replied--because what was he gonna do, ignore her?-- holding up the six pack he'd brought for emphasis.

"Well I was invited by the host," Heather said, sending Demitri a glare.  "So, what types of games were we thinking of playing?" This could get crazy quickly, but she would love to pound Demitri into the ground. She approached the woman and made to hand her the six pack she had brought. "Could you please put this in the fridge? I splurged so that it's not the cheapest stuff at least." She didn't have a personal beer preference, but knew that she was holding a popular brand.

Maxine saw too many people getting mushy inside and was quick to pour herself a glass and sneak outside. She groaned seeing Logan outside, but was happy to see Charlotte out back. "Did someone say drinking games? Let's get this party started!"

Charlotte stilled at Trevor's voice but nodded at his answer. Turning to Heather, she nodded and met her halfway to accept the bottle from her. "You got it, there's probably still room on the top shelf for this--if you come looking for it." Maxine's grand entrance brought a smile to her face; she made a mental note to sneak back out for games later and started backing slowly towards the house. "Everyone else good?"

Kids? Demitri thought as he glanced towards the woman that just entered the backyard. "You could get me two beers." He winked at the woman. He really only drank to keep up appearances. He didn't actually like the taste of most alcoholic drinks. "Not these games." He motioned towards the cornhole and ladderball. "Something more interesting." He said with a smile. "Something with alcohol, for sure." He then glanced towards the woman that just came out and asked about drinking games. "What's your favorite drinking game?" He asked Maxine as he moved closer to Heather, just to annoy her. He liked getting under everyone's skin but recently, Heather was a person he was focused more on.

It took every ounce of Charlotte's willpower to not roll her eyes at the man. "Two beers, coming right up." And with that she disappeared into the house.

Maxine lifted her glass to indicate that she was covered. "You better come back out and join us for some games!" While the set up was very elegant, the game selection was lacking for a party. "First we need some tunes going. I see a speaker over there, someone should get some tunes going. If we're looking to just get drunk fast, we could start with sip, sip, shot?"

"Thank you," Heather told Charlotte as she took the drinks. "Don't worry about it, I brought this for everyone else." But when Demetri ordered some drinks--quite rudely--she decided she had to be a part of the drinking to not stand out. "Actually, I will go ahead and take one of my drinks," she backtracked, grabbing one from her six pack. She popped it open and took a swig, wincing as the alcohol went down. "Maxine!" she exclaimed in uncharacteristic excitement at the new arrival. She moved closer to the newcomer, but didn't miss Demitri moving closer as well. Finally someone she knew was trustworthy. As another witch, Maxine might even be able to help if her suspicions about Logan's species were correct.

Maxine grinned seeing Heather. She hadn't noticed her at first but was quick to walk over. She didn't know Demetri well, but she had her own reservations about Trevor and Logan. "Hey girl, good to see you here! You a fan of drinking games?"

Trevor hadn't wanted to ask Charlotte to bring his own six pack in, so instead he set it down in the grass at his feet. "These are for anyone who wants to save themselves a trip inside," he announced as he did so, glancing around at the group steadily growing larger. "Feel free to take them for your drinking games."

"It's good to see you too." Heather shrugged. "I'm not really into heavy drinking, but I'm willing to play along. I wouldn't mind seeing secrets spill tonight." Not her own of course. "I have a feeling you can hold your liquor though." She watched the man she didn't know and decided that he didn't seem too suspicious...yet. "We can grab mine from the fridge as well once they are chilled," she offered. The one in her hand was a bit warm.

Demitri smirked as he watched everyone discuss the drinks, and then the game. He noticed one of the men move to sit the six pack of beer on the ground at his feet. He already had some woman getting him his drinks, he didn't need the other male's. "I'm good. Thanks for offering." He said with a smile. He wasn't normally one to even say thank you but this was Demitri's way of trying to "fit in" with the crowd. The very lively crowd. "Ah, secret spilling. Now that's my kind of game." He eyed Heather with a smile. Secrets were something he specialized in. He was always trying to get information from any witch or potential whitelighter. Of course, he'd use those secrets and information to his advantage. "So, what's everyone's favorite drinking game that involves spilling some secrets?" He asked, glancing around. "Come on, don't be shy. We can vote on which one we'd rather participate in."

Trevor shook his head and raised his hands as if in surrender. "I'm driving tonight, so unfortunately no drinking games for me. But I'll be happy to watch. And judge," he added as an afterthought with a grin. Stepping to the side, he spotted an empty chair by the fire, and dropped into it.

Maxine raised a brow a bit surprised that the others were so interested in 'secret spilling'. She had to say she was intrigued. So she gave a shrug. "We can always play a game of true or false. Someone states two facts about themselves and we all have to determine which is true and which is a lie. Those who get it wrong have to take a drink."

Heather was surprised but relieved that the suggested game wasn't truth or dare. That could have turned  bad. "I think that sounds fun," she voted, "though I thought the game was two truths and a lie."

Xavier, who had slipped into the backyard only moments ago, armed with a smaller cooler made his way over to the gathered group, giving a nod of acknowledgement to Logan. "I'm with Heather on that one, I've always played it like two truths and a lie."

Alcohol in hand, Charlotte made it back outside in time to hear two truths and a lie. "Is that what you guys are starting with? That's fun," She said, crossing the yard to deliver the barely-cooled beers to the weird guy. "Never Have I Ever is a good one, too."

Maxine grinned as Charlotte came out. "It's just a modified version of the same thing, with higher odds, but I'm happy to start with either or a round of never have I ever. But I feel like we should take this over to the fire," she began, walking over to sit on the nice chairs arranged around the small fire pit.

"That's... not a bad idea," Charlotte agreed, taking a look around the group gathered for the game. She didn't know most of them that well, this would be an excellent pregame for the dance party inside. She twisted the cap off her bottle of wine as she followed Maxine over to the fire and claimed a chair closest to the house. "Now I know you can hear me, Max, no cheating!"

Heather brightened at Xavier's arrival and shouted a greeting. Now she was thinking she might actually have fun tonight. Now that the game was decided and ready she headed to  claim a chair as well, taking the one on the other side of Maxine. She motioned for Xavier to take her other side. It would be good to have someone strong to hold her back if she tried to leap across the fire pit and stab someone tonight. "So, do we have any volunteers to start?"

Logan nodded back at Xavior when he arrived and held back his glare at Demitri's rude comments and attitude. Cree couldn't  help it though-he was starting to grow nervous. Two confirmed witches in this group and Heather who he still wasn't quite sure what she was yet, made his instincts stay sharp. Either one of the games that was being suggested couldn't really affect him due to his high tolerance being a vampire. However, the vampire was still curious and wouldn't back down from a "fun" night.

Xavier pulled a beer out of his cooler and made his way over to the fire, taking the seat offered seat next to Heather. Taking note of the gathered crowd he only recognized about half of them. Overall it would make for an interesting game and hopefully he’d have a new friend or two.

Charlotte soon realized she hadn't brought a glass out. Looking around, she noticed a stack on the table of food and refreshments outside. The night was still too young to start drinking straight from the bottle, so she grabbed one and poured her drink as she rejoined the circle. With no immediate volunteers to start the game, she reluctantly raised her hand. "I'll go first," She said. "So two truths and a lie, let's see... my eyes are green, I haven't seen all the Harry Potter movies, and I... may have instigated a bar fight. At some point."

Logan smirked as he heard the truth and took a sip of his drink. His eyes scanned the crowd as he waited to see if anyone wanted to share their opinion first. After a few moments though, Cree spoke, “You’re eyes are not green luv.”

"You havent seen Harry Potter," Heather guessed. She didn't know Charlotte well, but eye color was an easy giveaway and she had said the bar fight in such a way that it sounded true. "Are they?" She asked at Logan's comment, leaning over to try and see Charlotte's eyes, squinting in the fire light, but it wasn't enough to see. She turned her squint to Logan. Did he know her well enough to have remembered her eye color? Or did he have really good vision?

Maxine had an impish grin on her face as she heard Charlotte's thought. But, she didn't mind drinking. And why win if she couldn't drink. Might as well bring others down with her. "Oh she definitely hasn't seen all of the Harry Potter movies."

Charlotte wiggled her eyebrows at Maxine's grin, and looked around the circle as the answers came in. "Good answers, good answers. Any more takers? Non-answers count as a loss~!"

Met with silence, Charlotte tipped her glass to Maxine, "I have not, and I refuse to watch 'em,"--and then to Logan. "But Logan's right, my eyes are brown. Who's up next?"

Demitri folded his arms across his chest and watched as everything began to unfold. It wasn't the kind of game he'd be interested in, but he could at least watch and see what information all of the people were willing to divulge to one another. It could give him some type of leverage. He uncapped his beer and took several long swigs.

Xavier obligingly took a sip of his beer. There were a lot of friends among this group, and he felt like it left him at a slight disadvantage in their current game, but he also supposed that that was how you made friends, playing games like these with strangers. Plus, the point of drinking games was to, well, drink.

"Guess I was wrong," Maxine commented with a shrug, taking a long sip from her drink. For a moment, she was silent, seeing if anyone else would pop up. But it was pretty silent, so she stepped in to save the momentum. "Okay, mine are...I have travelled to thirty different countries, I started my first 'business' venture in high school, and I have been invited out for drinks by a celebrity."

Heather sighed and took a drink. Many people did drinking games as an excuse to get drunk, but for her all games were meant to be won. "There is no way you have been to 30 countries." Max did seem driven enough to have started trying to make money in high school.

Charlotte stared intently at Maxine and tapped the rim of her cup, thinking. "Hmm, I know two countries for sure... I don't know about 30."

Xavier took a moment to study Maxine and think of what he knew of her. Not much, but enough. "I'm also gonna say that 30 countries seems a bit extreme."

Maxine looked around the fire pit as answers poured in. "Seems like you all have your minds made up. Any other answers before I reveal the lie?"

Charlotte followed Maxine's gaze around the circle and slowly raised her glass to take a sip of her drink.

Though he wasn’t planning on playing, Trevor couldn’t help but shake his head from his place by the fire. “Counties maybe, but countries? No way.”

Maxine let out a chuckle at the rest of the responses. "Well, sorry to disappoint, but my mothers did a lot of travelling and flew my brother and I out many places. I didn't start any businesses until early college days. I'm afraid you all have to drink."

"Oh, darn," Charlotte complained, not sounding the least bit disappointed to be taking another drink.

Heather looked between Maxine and Charlotte, suspicious of their collaboration. She took a swig in disappointment. "Well, I guess it's my turn." She turned her gaze to Demitrib to watch his reaction to her claims in particular. "Here are mine: one, I can hold my breath for over two minutes; two, I have been near an explosion; three, I can speak four languages."

Maxine took another swig of her drink as she considered Heather's options. "Hmm, I'm going to go with the first option."

Demitri couldn’t help but smirk as he noticed Heathers gaze on him. Her two truths and a lie wasn’t really anything he was interested in. No. He was more interested in the darker aspects of her and her past. “Last one.” He said, eyeing her closely as he took another sip of his beer.

Logan thought about Heathers choices and thought for a second. They were good ones and some of them-might have not been so obvious if they hadn’t spent some time with her. But having fought with her during their last encounter, he did have more of “feel” for her character. Though the vampire knew it wasn’t enough for be certain of his answer when it came to witches. “I second what Maxine chose.”

Looking at Heather, Charlotte considered her options. With nothing to go on, she was quite prepared to take another drink. "I want to say... door number three."

Huh, Heather had thought more people would have latched onto the explosion. Demetri didn't react to that one in particular, which was hopefully a good sign for his innocence. "Good job, the lie is number 3. In addition to English I only  have conversational Spanish and Japanese." Multiple people had guessed correctly, so she must be missing some key to this game. Maybe it was in the delivery or the believability of choices.

His smile widened when she confirmed that he, and a couple of others, were correct. He had a feeling, considering the encounters with the woman that he’d had. However, now he’s a bit curious about the explosion that she mentioned. He assumed it just had to do about her power. The one that she insists to him that she doesn’t have. Demitri knows better. He’s had a lot of experience when it came to witches. “Japanese?” He asked heather. “When did you learn that language?” He really hadn’t expected her to know more then English.

What?! Charlotte had so many questions, and even though she got this one right, she took another sip. "I always wanted to learn Japanese," She added wistfully. "I never got around to it, it's super cool that you did."

At the answer, Maxine took a drink. "Didn't you buy a book about it or something, too?" she asked Charlotte, curiously before looking out at the group. For now, she felt fine, but she had an inkling that if she stood, she would really feel the alcohol. But this was fun, she was getting to know different people better. "Okay, who is next?"

"In college," Heather answered, not giving any more details. She was nowhere near fluent, but she had taken the courses to the highest intermediate level. It was enough to impress most people. She smiled at Charlotte's comment. Turning to Xavier, she said, "You're up, X." 

"I totally did," Charlotte answered Maxine. "I bet it's buried on one of the book shelves in the basement. Guess what I looking for when I get home." She added with a chuckle.

Xavier was surprised to find that he wasn't as shocked as he would have suspected at learning that Heather had been involved with an explosion. Everyone had things in their past, after all. "Right." He looked around the circle, reminding himself that his boss was present and he didn't want to incriminate himself too much. "I was afraid of Winnie the Pooh when I was a kid, my favorite flavor of ice cream is coffee, and I've seen every episode of the Bachelor."

Heather tapped her finger on her bottle as she considered Xavier. "To be honest, I could believe any of those. But I'm gonna go with door two." She was hoping that the least embarrassing one was the lie. She had a sense for what type of person he was, but didn't know many personal details yet.

"Could be your resolution for next year," she teased Charlotte. "And now you have someone to practice with, maybe." Hearing the options, Maxine let out a hum. She didn't know Xavier too well, so it was hard to say. "I think I'm going to go with door three. There are just so many seasons of that show."

"Ooo yeah! That's not a bad idea," Charlotte didn't know Xavier at all, and each option sounded equally likely.  But out of all of them, she hoped this one was the lie. "Hmm, I'm gonna guess you weren't afraid of Winnie the Pooh."

"Wow, I didn't expect to divide the room that much." Xavier chuckled, looking around at everyone. "Anyone else want to guess?"

Caterina wandered out into the backyard to see how everyone was doing and was happy to see a group congregating. "Glad to see you all are enjoying the fire! How is everyone doing out here? Anyone need a refill? Oooh did you all start any of the games yet?"

Demitri glanced towards the man speaking and he shook his head back and forth. "I'm going to guess the third one. If that's not a lie, then you definitely should pretend it is." He smirked as he finished off his beer. "I need a refill." He winked at Caterina. "Something stronger than this piss drink, though."

"Coffee isn't my favorite flavor of ice cream, it's cookie dough." Xavier answered. "And before you ask, no, I don't know why I was terrified of Winnie the Pooh." He'd burst into tears at the sight of the bear more than once. And the less said about how he'd ended up watching every single episode of the Bachelor... probably for the best. "I'm good on drinks, thanks." He told their host.

"Dang. Both of those are good flavors, though," Charlotte conceded, taking another drink. She cast a sidelong glare at Demitri, but said nothing. "I'm doing alright, thank you, Cat!"

Maxine wrinkled her nose at the sound of cookie dough. "Really? I've always found it too sweet, but different tastes," she commented, with a shrug of her shoulders. Maxine waved a hand at Caterina. "I'm good thanks. We just started a drinking game out here, not any of the other games...why is there anything good hiding out here?"

"Hi Cat!" Heather greeted. "We're half a round into two truths in a lie." She smirked at finally getting one right. She raised her drink towards Xavier, "Right choice. Coffee is such a weird coffee flavor."

Something about Demetri put Caterina on edge. So hearing that no one else needed a refill, she let out a hum. "Well if it is just you needing a drink, I may wait a minute, apologies...oooh two truths and a lie?" she questioned sitting on one of the chairs. "That sounds fun. Learned anything interesting? And, there may be a game of truth or dare jenga hiding out here..."

Logan chuckled a little at his employers answers and made sure to remember that incase it became useful in the future. The man didn't know Xavier that well other then the basics and most importantly that he was a good employee and had given him no reason to not like him. But he still wondered how or why Xavier watched the Bachelor. When Demitri spoke up again demanding another drink, Logan decided it was a good time to take another sip of his own to keep quiet. But after hearing Cat's reply, the vampire smirked as he encouraged the host to join the game. "Why doesn't our host go next?" The longer the woman stayed, the longer the impolite man waited for his drink. There's some next to Trevor human, he wanted to snap, but he was doing his best to remain polite-for now. Though Logan did get a slight sense that Demitir wasn't exactly human. But then what?

"You know, I think I like that idea," Charlotte agreed, nodding at Logan.  She patted the seat of the empty chair next to her. "Pop a squat and tell us about yourself, Cat."

Caterina let out a hum. "Alright, I'll join in, but if I'm participating, then I want to hear what I've missed so far too," she said with a wink. "Okay so two truths and a lie...I've lived in Nepal, I have never watched any of the Lord of the Rings movies, and I hate steamed milk in coffee."

"Steamed milk." Charlotte answered after a moment of thought. "Speaking from experience, everyone's seen some of Lord of the Rings whether they've wanted to or not."

“How do you hate steamed milk in coffee?” Trevor exclaimed in surprise. “I’m gonna have to say that’s the lie. I do think it’s possible to never have seen any of the Lord of the Rings movies,” he continued, with a quick glance in Charlotte’s direction, “they’re not nearly as hard to escape on tv as Harry Potter.”

"I dunno, I have pretty distinct memories of flipping through the channels and catching glimpses of, like, 'Return of the King' or something," Charlotte recounted. "But yeah, Harry Potter's up there, too."

Caterina was definitely the type of person to feel strongly about coffee, so Heather felt that that was a truth. And she knew that Cat had lived in many places, so maybe Nepal was one of them. "I think that the second one is a lie. I bet you were hanging out with someone who made you watch part of one. Definitely not the whole one though, since those are insanely long movies."

Xavier took a moment to think it over. They were all so specific, but being a regular in a coffee shop he knew how people could get about their drinks, and Catarina seemed, from the little he knew about her, like someone who had seen the world. "I'm also going with Lord of the Rings, those movies are everywhere. How many memes are there now?"

Logan Cree wasn't sure about the last statement but he also was leaning towards the Lord of the Rings. "I agree with the second one being the lie. I find it pretty hard to imagine going on without seeing at least one of them. Plus, they also have another three that go with the Lord of the Rings...."

Maxine gave a hum considering the options. "I would have to go with the coffee thing too, you seem to have a strong opinion about your drinks," she added, thinking about the drinks she ordered at the Underworld. "Since you are participating too, we can catch you up on what we've learned soon."

Hearing the variety of responses, Caterina smirked to herself. "Seems like everyone is truly divided on this one, but a few of you were right on. I haven't seen any of the Lord of the Rings movies."

Trevor pumped his fist in mini victory, but then a moment later cocked his head to the side. “Wait, so then which is the lie? Nepal or the coffee?”

Charlotte crossed her fingers for the coffee, but slowly raised her glass--just in case.

"It's the coffee thing. I've never been a big fan of all the froth in steamed milk," Caterina answered.

"Yes!" Charlotte cheered, pumping a fist in the air. "I'm still taking a drink, though--this is a party after all."

Demitri hadn't even cared to guess. All he did was watch the others as the listened, put out their best guess, and waited. He was still waiting to see if the host, as she had stated, would get more drinks. But, he wasn't going to complain about it. He honestly could care less if he was drinking.

Heather sighed and took a drink. She cursed this dumb game which she apparently couldn't figure out. Well at least the ones left to go where the guys she wanted to learn about with this.

Trevor took a sip of his beer anyway, before leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. "Okay I guess I can go next..." He trailed off a moment thinking. "Okay. I've never broken any bones, I'm really good at baking brownies, and I haven't read a single book in five years."

"Question," Charlotte started. "are we counting eBooks and fractures as books and breaks?"

Despite Maxine having answered correctly, she took a drink too, and then filled Cat in on the fun tidbits she had missed. At Trevor's list, Maxine let out a hum. "I know how much your sister likes to back, so I'm going to go with the book one, though Charlie raises an important point."

Trevor blinked for a moment at the question, wracking his brain, before finally he shook his head. "I guess I am way too dumb to know the difference between a fracture and a break," he laughed. "So yes, all kinds of breaks, small and large. And yeah, I'd count eBooks as books."

Charlotte nodded at his answer, and thought over her own response. "Hmm, alright. I'm gonna say... the books, that's the lie."

Caterina couldn't say she knew Trevor well, but she'd seen him running the PTA booth and heard many rumors. And now getting more info on the others from this game, she was delighted she'd come outside. "I'd have to go with the broken bones option."

Xavier had dutifully taken his sip from the last round, and thought over the answers the man had given. “I’m gonna have to go with the book one.” He’d thought maybe the one about breaking bones, until he’d been asked about clarification.

Heather didnt know anything about this man, and her previous logic trains hadn't seemed to work anyways. So, she decided to just go for a wild guess. "Number 3 is the lie."

Sister? Logan thought. So the human did have a sister-no wonder his features looked familiar and now Logan had a solid guess as to who it was. "I'm also going to go with number 3 being a lie mate."

Trevor paused for any last stragglers before shrugging and scratching the side of his neck. “It sounds super depressing to say out loud but the book one is actually true. The lie is the broken bones. I’ve broken more than I’d like to admit, most recently my ribs last year,” he added, reaching down to touch his side absentmindedly. “So drink!”

Charlotte stared at Trevor, and did nothing to suppress the look of horror on her face. "That's horrifying, you know that, right? Just--just awful." She took a large gulp of wine and shook her head. "Someone else needs to speak now, please, I beg."

Heather agreed, "Yeah, that's a pretty major injury there. What the hell happened?" Unlike Charlotte though  she wanted to keep on this track. She didnt miss him reaching to touch his side. She took the smallest sip she felt she could get away with.

Trevor barked a laugh. “I think she was probably referring to the fact that I haven’t read in half a decade.” He shook his head, still smiling though he felt a little more bitter. “The rib thing? Injury at work. No worries though, it’s all healed by now.”

Maxine took a drink after getting the answer wrong and looked over at Logan and Demetri. "I think  it's time one of you two chip in now."

Broken ribs at work? What kind of job resulted in that kind of injury, Xavier wondered, reluctantly taking the required sip from his drink. He nodded along with Maxine's suggestion. "Yeah, come on boss man. You've been quiet enough." He said, pointing at Logan.

"That is extremely sad as well," Heather added. It dissapointed her how many people never read anything not assigned for school.

Logan chuckled softly. It was a little funny that humans could still occasionally surprise him. Taking another sip after getting yet another answer wrong-not that it was affecting him in anyway-he smirked at Xavier. “Glad to hear-and see-the injury wasn’t life threatening mate. Very well....” he paused thinking of things that would still be believable and not “impossible” for regular people to do before answering. “I’ve dated twin celebrities. I’ve done commissioned paintings. I can read Egyptian Coptic.”

Hearing Logan's potential truths, Charlotte raised an eyebrow and smirked a little. Knowing what he was but not how old he was made this a... very interesting round. "Wooooow, that's a lot to unload there."

Xavier knew that his boss was an interesting man, who'd lead an interesting life, but he didn't even know where to being guessing on this one. "And when you say commissioned paintings do you mean you commissioned and sat for them or that you were the artist in question?"

Logan took a swing of his drink and smirked at Xavier's question before answering, "That I was the artist in question."

Demitri couldn't help but be amused at all of these so called "confessions" and lies. "I say the lie is that you've dated twin celebrities." Demitri chose to answer this one, eyeing Logan closely.

"The Egyptian feels too specific to be a lie..." Charlotte thought outloud. "Or maybe just specific enough. I don't know, I'm gonna say the twins."

Now this was an interesting round, Heather thought, raising an eyebrow. These all lined up with her evaluation of Logan as full of himself. "I don't think you can read Coptic. Unless you were a scholar studying that culture you would have no reason or easy way to learn that."

Caterina was delighted that she got the answer right to Trevor's list and didn't take a drink. She was planning to stay sober to be a good host. At Logan's list, she raised a brow and let out a hum. That was an interesting list of things. "Wow, what a list. Makes me feel boring. I'd have to say reading Egyptian Coptic is the lie."

"Egyptian what," Trevor repeated, furrowing his brow. "That has to be the lie," he reasoned, "it's too out there. Even if you'd previously lived in Egypt or something, I'd be way more likely to believe you spoke Arabic."

The clarification that Xavier had asked for actually hadn't provided all that much clarification. "It's a tough one, but I'm gonna go with the Egyptian as well."

Maxine looked at Logan as he listed his three and studied him closely. She wasn't sure if he would even abide by the rules but conceded. "I'm going with option two."

Charlotte took a drink before hearing the answer and leaned toward Maxine. Lowering her voice so as to not interrupt the rest of the game, she asked, "I'm gonna get something to eat, do you want anything?"

Maxine looked up from her drink as Charlotte made the offer and nodded. "I think it's about time for a refill, so I'll join you." That said, Maxine stood up to follow her.

Logan laughed at the answers and smirked holding up his drink to everyone. “Everyone except Maxine drink up!” Catching Maxines eyes, he sent her a playful wink before taking the last sip of his drink.

Just before moving inside, Maxine gave Logan a wink and the middle finger. "We'll be right back, so don't spill too many secrets without us!"

Charlotte watched the interaction with amusement, shaking her head and chuckling before heading inside.

Caterina let out a little huff of disappointment but took a sip. "Okay, I've got to know how and why did you learn Egyptian coptic? And I propose that once we finish this round, we bring out the jenga blocks. I think most of us are at a good place to make it fun."

"I call bullshit," Heather interjected. "There is no way that you just know a language like that. Arabic, sure, but you gotta explain Coptic."

"Exactly!" Trevor exclaimed, gesturing in Heather's direction. "That's what I'm saying." His tone was still good natured though, and despite the fact that he shook his head in disbelief, he still dutifully took his drink.

Seeing Maxine's gesture brought another chuckle out of Logan as he shook his head and reached for another drink that the human had placed on the floor. The vampire wasn’t a beer type person but it was something. Hearing the others surprised tones and questions kept the smirk on his face while he answered, “You’re right. I didn’t just “know” Coptic. I had a.....a friend” A Maker, he thought, “a while back who was an Egyptian specialist-she knew all about the language. And I was in the mood for a new hobby....”

"Such an interesting hobby." Demitri said, his eyes on Logan still. The man wasn't human, that much he knew. He wouldn't have been surprised if Logan was actually pretty old. He may not physically look it, but the way he spoke made Demitri get some sense of it.

Caterina eyed the man. "I believe it's your go. You're the only one that hasn't 'spilled your guts' so to say."

"Oh so now you want me to tell mine?" He asked, teasing her. He pressed his lips together into a thin line as he pondered what he was going to say. Demitri smirked and then stated. "I've had a couple of stalkers in the past, I've seen someone die, and I don't like eating food." No one there, or in town, knew anything about him so honestly, to them, any one of those statements could be a truth or a lie.

"That is the point of the game, isn't it," Caterina commented. For a moment, her jaw nearly dropped at the items he listed because they were all so odd, but she managed to collect herself. "Despite how odd all of those are, I guess I'll go with the last one?"

Heather took note of what Logan said. She believed him now, but there was a whole interesting history behind that that she wanted to know. She leaned forward in interest. Finally, it was Demitri's turn.  "Or were you the stalker yourself?" she asked, glaring at Demitri. She absolutely believed that he had seen someone die. Honestly, she could believe any of those as truths with how messed up of a person she thought Demitri was. Steeling herself for the drink she knew she would have to take, she said, "I'm saying two was a lie."

"Ah... Heather, Heather." Demitri turned towards the woman with the smile. "Always observant, aren't we?" He winked at her and glanced around. He didn't care to hear what anyone else thought. "You both get to drink. It was the first one that was the lie."

Heather continued to glare, not caring who else was around. Was he admitting that he had stalked her? "Somehow I have trouble believing anything you say." She kept eye contact as she took her drink, finishing the last of her bottle. The urge to throw it at him was strong, but she resisted.  Wait, so it was true that he didn't like eating food. It was a natural act, necessary for survival. Unless he isn't human...

Caterina took a drink but eyed Demitri oddly. "What kind of person doesn't like to eat food?"

Demitri snorted. “oh come on, Heather. I’d never lie to you.” He offered her a warm, charming smile as he watched her finish her drink. “Not everyone likes eating. Some eat just to survive. I don’t like the act of eating. I don’t see why that’s so odd.” He shrugged his shoulders. Of course, he worded it so it wasn’t a lie but in reality, he just didn’t enjoy human food.

That wasn't the one Trevor would have guessed either, but he dutifully took a sip of his beer. "As the kids these days say, 'weird flex but okay'. But hang on--" he continued, as something clicked. "Are we all just going to ignore the fact he said he's seen someone die?"

Heather snorted. "Yeah, right." Damn it annoyed her how he kept trying to charm her-- or something. "Yeah, Demitri, wanna elaborate?"

Logan held back a chuckle at Cat's comment and knew a few answers to those who didn't enjoy to eat. The vamp would remember to keep an eye on Demitri though. "Have we not all seen someone die before? On TV, in the hospital, or being in the wrong place at the wrong time? He could have meant anything....couldn't you have mate." Logan smirked bringing the drink to his lips and then decided against it. Meanwhile, he's ears heard the word 'shots' inside. Maybe a little harmless fun inside is in order? "I'm going inside for....a different type of drink."

Demitri smiled, his eyes flickered between Trevor and Heather but lingered on the woman. He knew he'd have to do a lot more than any of this to get her on his side. But he was up for the challenge. "See? Logan has the right frame of mind." He motioned towards the other male. "Wrong place wrong time... or wrong place, right time?" He tilted his head to the side. "I tried to help the woman." Lie. "But she didn't make it." He shrugged his shoulders. "At least, that's what I heard along the rumor mill." He spun his finger in a horizontal circle. "But don't act like none of you have witnessed someone die. Isn't the True Crime and Horror genre's pretty popular among people lately? I'm sure you've seen something along those lines."

Caterina gave an odd look at everyone. "This conversation is taking a...morbid turn. I think I'm going to get the jenga blocks set up while you all sort this out, or whatever."

You didn’t say it was on TV... Trevor wanted to argue but he decided there was no point. He didn’t know the other man well enough. Instead he just shrugged once again. “So did anyone win? I know I sure lost.” His mostly empty beer was testament to that. And he wasn’t going to start another game... But he hadn’t seen heads or tails of Maggie which meant she must be inside having a good time. So...”Sure, Jenga it is then.”

Caterina finished the set up and began explaining the rules. "For those who haven't played truth or dare jenga, each time you pull a block, you have to do the action or answer the question provided. If you refuse, you take a drink."

"I'll start, I guess," he continued, standing up from his place by the fire and moving towards the blocks. Trevor paused for a moment, before picking one smack in the middle of the whole tower. "This one seems safest. Okay. Never have I ever. Huh. Didn't we just play this?" Taking the moment to think, he plopped the block on the top of the tower. "Okay fine, never have I ever been to college."

Having been to college, Charlotte took a drink and glanced around the circle to see who else had also been to college.

Caterina also took a sip of her drink.

Heather snuck around to grab a beer from Trevor's six pack since she had finished her drink during the last game. Sitting back down, she took a sip.

Demitri grabbed one of the beers on the ground and took off the cap but didn’t drink. As far as he knew, he hadn’t gone to college. He glanced around to observe who was drinking.

"Me next!" Charlotte volunteered. Studying the solid tower, she carefully poked one of the side blocks out and read it aloud. "'Which famous personality do you have a crush on and why?' Lame. But like, even though I never watched the movies, I always had a huge crush on Emma Watson. She's so accomplished for her age and she uses her platform so well." With her block fulfilled, she delicately placed it on the top of the tower. "Next?"

She gave a nod at Charlotte's answer. "I'll go ahead and take this round." Caterina took a moment to circle the tower and pulled one from near the bottom successfully. "If you could have anything, what would it be? Hmmm, well, I'm interpreting this as something material, and I would adore a trip to Paris." Question answered, she placed the block on the top.

"I'll go next," Heather hopped up, wanting to get it over with. She took a few seconds to study the tower well and pick a block about halfway up to pull. After reading the block in her head, she cussed and her face turned red. She looked around the crowd, gave a big sigh, and set the block down on the top. Without a word Heather returned to her seat and took a drink.

"Wait wait wait," Trevor leaned forward, out of curiosity. "What did it say?"

Caterina gave a nod as well. "Yes, that is part of the game. We have to know what it said."

"Tickle someone," Heather said flatly.

Charlotte couldn't stop the laugh that came out of her mouth. "Oh no, I can only imagine what else is hidden in there."

Demitri watched as the others chose blocks, read off the questions and answered. Although, Heather answers late. “You didn’t want to tickle someone? That’s not even bad.” He snorted, leaning towards her slightly with a smile. He took a step forward and pulled out a block. It told him to pick another one. “It days pull another one.” He as he then grabbed another one. “What’s your greatest fear?” He read aloud. “I don’t have one.”

Maxine wandered out after taking her shot and quickly noted the game happening. "Well that seems like complete bullshit," she began. "Everyone has something there afraid of, if you don't want to admit it, I think the rule is that you gotta drink." But it was her turn, so she found an easy brick to grab, looked at what it said, and set it beside her. She walked over to Charlotte. "Says I gotta rub noses with someone, so I guess it's eskimo kisses for us."

"Gross, I don't even know you," Charlotte replied with a big grin, obviously joking. She stood up to meet Maxine and rubbed noses with her. "Call me~." She said as she sat back down.

Maxine acted aghast at Charlotte's comment before the two rubbed noses. After a second or two, they separated and Maxine gave a playful wink. "Any time." She moved back to the tower and placed the brink on the top.

Logan smirked as he watched those go before before stepping up for his own turn. With ease the block slipped out and a mentally groaned as he read, "What's your most embarrassing moment ever?" Ever!? Really... "Uh...pen on my face before a meeting with some investors?"

Trevor couldn't help but speak out. "That's your most embarrassing moment? Ever? Damn I'd love to have your life," he laughed.

"Pen on your face? Really?" Charlotte tried to keep a straight, disappointed face, but it quickly dissolved into a fit of tipsy giggles. "That's almost as bad as Mr. No-Fear over there. But Trevor's right, if that's really it you're doing pretty good."

Valerie had poured herself a third shot and walked outside just in time to hear Logan's answer and laughed. "Oh I'm next! Me next!" The shifter drowned the third shot and shut her eyes as the liquid went down. "Whooo! Alright..." Pulling out her block, she threw her head back laughing. "Never have I ever....kissed someone in the first fifteen minutes of meeting them!"

Maxine pulled a face at Logan's answer. "I agree with Charlie, seems like a cop out answer." But given the 'never have I ever' she took a drink.

Caterina on the other hand did not drink, she was tempted to ask who would kiss someone within fifteen minutes of meeting them, but bit her tongue.

"Never in fifteen minutes, nope," Charlotte shook her head. "But twenty minutes.... that's another story." She added with another giggle.

Heather raised an eyebrow. "That's a really low bar."

Demitri licked his lips and smiled. "Got me there." He lifted the beer to his lips and took a long swig. He had done things like that before. He had even went up to women and kissed them within the first second of meeting them.

Trevor shook his head. "Guess I'm safe from that one."

Smirking, Logan lifted his drink to his lip and took a sip.

Trevor glanced around the circle before realizing it was his turn again. It was more difficult this time, but he managed to choose a block on the side that only made the tower sway a little before steadying again. "Finish your drink" he read aloud. "Ha, that's easy enough." Placing the block atop the tower, he returned to his seat. The bottle he'd been nursing only had about a third left, and he lifted it to his lips, tipping it back and finishing in two swallows.

Valerie pouted realizing she didn't have a drink with her other than the empty glass of her shot. Looking around, she saw the beer that was on the floor next to Trevor and made her way over to grab one.

Reaching toward the tower again, Charlotte slid another block out and read it. "Gents take a drink. Sorry, boys." But she wasn't feeling very sorry as she stacked the block back on top.

Demitri nodded and tipped his beer bottle to his lips again, taking a swig.

Logan took a sip also without complaint.

Trevor was at a dilemma after finishing his last drink. "I might have to bow out of this game, unless you'll let me play with water. I can't have another unfortunately, I'm DD tonight."

Charlotte nodded sagely. "Water is acceptable, hydration is important."

Caterina gave a nod at Trevor's request. "I say that is fine, safety first after all." The tower was looking a bit more precarious, but with a little pit of poking, she found a good option and pulled it out. "Finish your drink. Alright, just going to put this back first." Her drink was just under half full, so once the brink was placed, she downed the rest.

With two votes in his favor, Trevor nodded his thanks and lifted a water bottle to take his sip from the last round.

Heather crossed her fingers as she approached the tower. No one else had passed yet, so she couldn't do it a second time. There was one block a third up that was an easy choice, and she slid it out. She groaned as she read the block. "I have to sit in the lap of the person to my right until my next turn." She thanked all that was holy that it was her right and not her left--where Demetri sat. "Cat, would you mind?" If it was anyone other than Cat or Max, she likely would have passed anyways. She placed the block carefully on the top of the pile.

Caterina considered for a moment. It seemed rather intimate, but this was for the sake of a game, so she adjust how she was sitting. "For you, Heather, I would not mind."

Heather nodded and sat gingerly on Cat's legs, her bottom forward almost to the other's knees.

Demitri watched as Heather read out her block and moved to sit on Caterina. If he was a human and didn't have such a sadistic mind, he might think it was adorable. But he didn't. He turned and grabbed the next block and read it out loud. "What's the best game you've ever played in the dark?" He smirked and tucked on the front of his teeth as he leaned back in his chair. "Hide and seek." Most might think the game was innocent fun, but not the way Demitri played it.

Once again, Maxine found herself weirded out by this man's answer. But it was her turn now. The tower was getting wobbly but she picked from near the top. "Alright, the tallest person has to drink," she called out, carefully placing the brick on the top. It continued to wobble, slightly, but didn't fall.

Demitri glanced around at the other's, knowing full well that he was one of the tallest. There weren't many people taller than him in town. He nodded and took another swig of his drink.

Heather took a childish joy in Demitri having to pay for being so ridiculously tall.

Logan noticed the tower's tilt when Maxine grabbed and placed her block back. With him being next, he thought he grabbed a block that would hold. The vampire couldn't have been more wrong. The moment he pulled the block 3/4 of the way, the tower fell. "My apologizes?" The man said with a chuckle still passing his lips.

Caterina peered around Heather at the mess of blocks. She wasn't sure Heather had to keep sitting on her lap now that the tower had fallen, but didn't say anything for the moment. "It was bound to happen. I guess it's your responsibility to rebuild it then. Round two, everyone?"

Heather snickered at the tower falling. She wasnt sure if that meant she would leave Cat's lap, but she stood up anyways and went back to her seat, too embarrassed to look at Cat.

Logan nodded and replied, "It's the least I could do..."

Trevor saw the blocks start to tip and winced as they came crashing down. “Better luck next time,” he laughed, before pushing himself to his feet. “ I think that’s it for me, better go collect my sister. Good game though. And hey, great party,” he added in Caterina’s direction. Before he could fully walk away he turned back and offered, “Anyone else need a ride home?” He glanced around the circle at the game participants, careful not to meet Charlotte’s eyes, to check if anyone else was leaving.

"Thank you for coming by. Text someone here when you get home safely, okay?" Caterina said after resettling herself in her seat.

Valerie waved at Trevor and smiled. "Thanks for coming!"

Charlotte said nothing, but waved slightly at Trevor as he passed. She gave it a little while before standing up, wobbling only slightly. "I need a refill. I'll bring some beer out if anyone wants any--Heather, did you want... whatever you had me put in the fridge?"

"I could use another drink," Caterina requested, seeing as she had to finish hers.

"I can go get the drinks." Demitri stood from the seat. "What is it that you guys want?"

"Tequila please!" Valerie said, winking at the stranger and taking a sip of her beer.

Heather waved her hand. " No thanks." She still had a lot left in this drink, and she did have to drive home later. For not the first time that night she wondered why she got involved in the drinking games. "Ever the gentleman," she said sarcastically to Demitri.

"Oh," Charlotte blinked, surprised by the man's offer. "Sure, thank you. There's a bottle of moscato on the counter still, that's mine if you could grab it. And then the beers are all over the fridge, I just put them wherever there was room." And with that she eased back into her seat.

Caterina looked at the man, and gave a nod. "I'll just take a glass of the chardonnay that's on the counter as well."

"Tequila for the lovely dark haired woman." Demitri offered the girl a smile and then glanced towards their host. "I'll bring the lot, don't worry." He then heard Heather and he rolled his eyes. "I'll bring you your drinks too, don't worry." He then made his way inside to grab everything they had asked for.

Heather interjected, "But I said no."

Valerie volunteered to go first and picked the first block her eyes set eyes on. Pulling it out was easy but reading it and not bursting into laughter was not. "Wh-what’s your favorite battery-operated t-toy?" The laughter soon came after the sentence finished. "Oh....there's just too many to choose from! If you know what I mean....." She added with a wink towards the crowd.

Maxine snickered at the answer and gave her own slow clap. "True that, girl."

Charlotte smirked and nodded. "Right on, Val, right on."

"Guess its my turn now," Maxine stood up and carefully pulled out a brick. "Most embarrassing thing you've ever had to buy....hmm I have definitely felt super judged and embarrassed about buying a pregnancy test, so I'll stick with that."

His arms filled with liquor of everything everyone wanted, he stepped back out of the house and heard what Maxine had said. Demitri moved around the circle, lowering what each person wanted to them. "There you go." He muttered. "And here..." He made sure to give everyone their beverage, smiling at each of them before sitting down with his own. Just another beer. "So what did I miss?"

Caterina stood as Maxine placed her block and pulled out another. "Say something romantic to the person on your left," she looked over to Heather. Well that was rather awkward. She took a beat to consider what to say. "Your sense of determination is inspiring and you are wicked smart." Was that too much? It was supposed to be romantic, not a pick up line. Face a bit red, she put the brick on the top and sat down. Quietly, she muttered a thanks to Demitri as she took a sip of her wine.

Val nodded her thanks to the stranger and poured herself another shot. Logan smiled softly at Cat's statement and took a sip of his own wine.

Heather shifted uncomfortably when she realized that it was going to be her. Cat was a very attractive woman and a friend, but it was crazy that this game was making them do stuff like this. She honestly smiled though at Caterina's compliment. "Thank you," she said before turning back to the front and taking a drink to hide whatever her face was trying to do.

After taking a sip of her wine, Caterina responded with a subdued, "of course." I mean it but didn't want to come off too strong or seem rattled in front of the others. Maybe she shouldn't keep drinking.

Heather was sure her luck couldn't get worse as she slid the next block out. "Which player would you like to be stranded on a desert island with?" she read aloud after confirming it didnt involve physical touch. "Maxine." She knew Maxine was a witch, which would be helpful, and was trustworthy as far as she knew.

Hearing the response, Maxine gave a response. "We'd have one hell of an island party," she joked before taking another sip of her drink.

Demitri listens and then when it's his turn, moved towards one of the blocks. He pulls and just when he thinks he was golden, the whole towel falls over and crashes to the ground. He frowns then lets out a sigh. "Don't everyone stand at once." He held his hands out. "I got it."

Maxine gave a shrug and took another drink. "Well, I mean, you did knock it over. I think I could still do one more round?"

Heather busts out laughing at Demitri's failure. Suddenly the entire night is worth it, and it only took--she checked the time and realized it was quite late. She stands and walks over to Demitri, then gives him a pat on the back. "Oof, almost had it there buddy." Then she kicks one of the blocks away from him. "Well, that's it from me for tonight. Goodbye everyone else." She heads towards the gate and waves at the group.

Logan chuckled at the man picking up the blocks and nods his goodbye to Heather. Valerie smiled and waved at Heather. "Bye!"

Caterina chuckles a little at the interaction and feels a slight bit sad Heather has to go, but gives a wave. "Text when you get home safe! Good night!"

Charlotte barely suppressed another giggle at Demitri's misfortune, but her glee seeped out as Heather announced her leave. "Aww, alright. It was good to see you! Have a good night!"

Demitri watched as Heather walked towards him and patted him on the back. It was the first contact she willingly gave him and he'd take it. It was a win for him, in his eyes. He watched as she kicked one of the blocks and if no one was around, he would have grabbed her by the arm and snapped at her. But he kept his cool and began stacking the blocks again. "Sweet dreams, Heather." He said in a soothing tone of voice and offered her a smile. Once he finished, he grabbed another block. "Imitate a pop or rock star." He rolled his eyes and grabbed his beer. "No thank you." And took a long swig.

Maxine gave a wave to Heather as she left. "Glad you came by! Night!" Her attention turned back to Demetri as he refused the challenge. "I thought you said nothing scares you? And you're turning down a simple challenge?"

"Oh booo! You're no fun stranger!" Valerie said and stuck her tongue out at him before taking another shot. You need to stop with those shots Val, she reminded herself.

"Too bad, I think the birthday girl needed a serenade," Charlotte added as Demitri passed up on his block. Now her turn, Charlotte carefully plucked a block near the middle and read it. "Youngest person drinks, and that is definitely not me."

Maxine shook her head, too. "That's not me either." But she still took another sip anyways. She had a ride home arranged.

"I think it might be one of our birthday girls, if I'm not mistaken," Caterina piped up.

Valerie looked around as others began to say if they were or weren't the youngest and was pleased when it appeared to be her. "Aaannnd that'll be meeeee!" The shifter began, her words slightly starting to slur. Not good, she thought but smiled at the crowd and held her shot glass up and drowned it.

Logan took a step forward and pulled out his block smirking at what it said. "Ladies, take a drink." The vampire then held up his glass of wine to them letting them drink first before drinking himself.

Charlotte raised her glass slightly before taking a drink, finishing off what little was left in the glass. She poured the remains of the bottle in her glass. "Remind me to switch to water after this is gone." She said to no one in particular, but mostly herself.

Caterina took another small sip. All of her drinks throughout the night had been pretty small, so she was feeling more than tipsy, but not wasted. "You've got it, Charlotte. I think I need some water, so I can grab you a glass. Anyone else?"

Maxine took another sip and was still feeling pretty fine. "I'll take a small glass, but only if you have enough hands to carry them all."

"OOoofff...." Val squinted at the tequila bottle and giggled. "Here goes nothing..." she mumbled and took another shot, this time feeling a rough burn in her throat. Once she finished, the shifter raised her hand, "Water...yes, pweatty please?"

Val knew it was her turn next but if it involved more drinking, the birthday girl was going to have to back out that round. Thankfully, as she pulled the block free and read it, the drinking was not meant for her this time. "Neighbors to my left and right, drink!"

Neighbors meant Maxine so she took another drink and was reconsidering how much she needed the water.

Before long Caterina walked back out with four glasses of water and passed them all out. "Alright, hopefully that should help prevent terrible hang overs."

"Cat you are a literal angel, thank you!" Charlotte declared as she accepted the water.

"Thanks," Maxine commented before moving to grab her own block. "Ladies drink, again. Good thing we all have waters now." With that she took a sip of water.

Val smiled at Cat and blew her a kiss. "Thank you!" And after hearing Maxine's block, the shifter was very glad to have the water in her hands as she took a sip also.

"The timing on that was incredible," Charlotte sighed, dutifully taking a sip of wine followed by a drink of water.

"You're welcome, I know I can be," she winked.Caterina took a long drink from her water glass, too and moved to grab another brick. "Let's hope its not another of those," she muttered. "Gentlemen drink this time."

Demitri smirked but said nothing as he took a sip of his beer.

Logan chuckled watching those who didn't have that much of a tolerance drink and then took a drink himself, emptying the glass of wine before refilling it again with what was left of the bottle he held.

Demitri moved forward once everyone was done drinking and pulled a block. “Everyone drinks again.” He announced and took another swig, finishing the bottle.

Caterina took a long drink from her water, nearly finishing it. "There aren't even that many drinking ones in there," she commented.

Valerie bit her lip hard looking at the Tequila bottle in her hand versus the beer in the other. Beer this time Val, she told herself and took a small sip of it before quickly drinking some water.

On the other hand, Maxine switched back to her alcoholic drink and took another drink. "Guess we just got lucky," she shrugged.

Charlotte took another drink of her wine, and another drink of water. "Are you sure about that?" She laughed. "Could've fooled me."

Logan laughed as the blocks continued to involve drinking and finished his bottle as well. "Two birthday woman, double the alcohol."

Charlotte approached the tower carefully, sending up prayers to whatever was listening for a block that didn't hand out blanket shots. She slid the first block out with ease. "And it's... nothing, 'pick another block'." Safe for now. Placing the block back on top, she went after one lower on the tower. "'Drink some water', yeah I can definitely do that." She said with a grin, sitting back down and taking a big drink from the glass Cat gave her. "That was lucky."

Val giggled at Charlie's luck and nodded as she drank more water while watching Logan pick out his block. 

Logan carefully reaching out, this time paying a bit more attention to which looked like the looser blocks, he pulled one out and read it out loud. "Ever been skinny-dipping? Well well, aren't we the curious ones." Smirking he placed the block on top as he answered, "Indeed I have."

Valerie narrowed her eyes at the towers as if she could spell the blocks to be nice to her. Slowly reaching out, the woman pulled out a block and groaned out loud this time. "Oh shit I'm in trouble....and gonna need more limes. It says, Double shots!" Val started to giggle a little as she cheated and took one shot and only swallowed half of the second.

Caterina looked at Val a bit nervously. She had drank a lot. "Do you need more water, Val? And I hope you're planning to stay the night tonight because I doubt you are in any condition to drive."

Meanwhile Maxine approached the tower and pulled another block. "Seven minutes in heaven or hell with the person on my right...well I'm in a very committed relationship, so I have to be a party pooper this time. But could play seven minutes of grabbing you something to drink, or eat?"

Looking at the person to Maxine's right, Charlotte thought that was a good idea. "Yeah, I think she's gonna need it. Maybe some excedrin or ibuprofen to get ahead of tomorrow's migraine?"

Val laughed and mumbled, "Wwhat are you saaaying? I'm not....drunk drunk....just, don't ask me to walk in a straight line...."

"Probably the best move, there. I have some ibuprofen just under the counter." Caterina stood to take her turn and pulled out a brick reading "kiss the person on your left. Well Charlotte, are you game for a kiss?"

Maxine gave a quick "Uh-huh, well, you may not be yet, but you just took two shots, might take a few more minutes to hit you. I'm going to get you more water." She turned and walked inside to grab a few items for Valerie.

The shifter pouted as she sat there like a little girl and looked at Charlie and Cat. "That's not fwair.....I don't even get a kissss...." But Valerie still smiled as she watched her other friends continue on with their game.

Charlotte tore her attention away from Maxine's mothering to Caterina's proposition. "Of course," She answered with a grin, standing up (and up higher on her tip toes) to meet the taller woman's in a kiss. She only broke it off to look over at Val and laugh. "Poor birthday girl deprived of her birthday kisses, hang on--!"

Caterina leaned down a bit for the kiss, but also became distracted by Valerie's pouting. "Val, its your birthday, if you want a kiss, just ask," she teased.

Valerie giggled and smiled innocently at the women in front of her and nodded, "I....I want kissessss! Pwease...and thank you...."

Logan meanwhile walked over behind Valerie and slowly moved the Tequila bottle away from her and placed it somewhere out of Val's sight.

Maxine soon returned with the larger glass of water and some ibuprofen. "Drink more water, and have these by your side. Trust me, I've seen too many people regret birthdays due to too much drinking."

"Hey me first, we weren't finished here," Charlotte teased Cat, pulling her back down. "She can wait."

Caterina blinked out of surprise. Was Charlotte very drunk too? "You did get robbed a proper kiss," with that, she leaned in to give her a better kiss. Not just a stage kiss

"Kisses!" Valerie shouted clapping at Cat's and Charlie's kiss. She then smiled at Maxine and looked at the water that was offered to her and the pills. "But...I'm not dwunk....."

Seeing Charlotte and Caterina going in for the kiss, Maxine discreetly took a picture.

Satisfied, Charlotte garbbed Cat's hand and pulled her over by Val. "And now the birthday girl gets her kisses!" She declared, releasing Cat and squatting down beside the seated shapeshifter and giving her a chaste kiss on the cheek. "Happy birthday, Val!"

Caterina followed Charlotte's lead and gave Valerie a kiss on the cheek as well. "We should probably get you to bed. How does that sound?"

Valerie smiled perfectly drunk now and accepting the kisses gracefully with her eyes closed. "Puurfect! Thank youuuu." She said opening her eyes and leaning her head on Charlie's shoulder and then Cat's before looking over at Maxine and raising an eyebrow. "And ww...what about youuuu? No bwirthday kiss?" And then the shifter pouted once more teasingly.

Logan couldn't hold back his laughter now as he watched the poor 27 year old wanting all the kisses she could get. But for now, all the vampire did was begin to pick up the empty cups that had been left nearby.

Maxine paused for a moment. But the jenga block had implied as much. "Alright, alright. It is your birthday after all." She walked over and placed a kiss on Valerie's forehead before giving a wave to everyone. "My ride is here, so I gotta head out. Do you have a safe way home, Charlie? Or are you crashing here too?"

Pleased with Maxine's actions, Valerie smiled and then accepted Cat's offer by nodding and then answered for Charlie without thinking, "Charlie...is sleeping over no?" Val, shut up, her thoughts told her.

Charlotte laughed as Val beckoned Maxine over, too. She squeezed Val's shoulder and stepped back, extracting herself from the huddle and moving toward Maxine to give her a hug goodbye. "Thanks, but I should be good. Wyatt or Quentin should still be up to get me, but I'm gonna stick around and help clean up a bit." Val's comment caught her ear as well and she laughed again. "And probably help get her situated, too."

Maxine nodded and gave a wave as she walked towards the gate. A car was there waiting for her. "This was a pretty fun party. Night everyone."

"Good night! Text me when you get home!" Charlotte called after her.

"Good night, get home safe!" Caterina gave her thanks to Charlotte for helping. "I think we should first get Valerie situated for bed."

"I should probably head out also ladies. Most of the yard is clean-not too many cups out except those around the campfire. Thank you for the invite Caterina," Logan smiled politely and then looked at Valerie offering the woman a smile also, "Happy Birthday Valerie."

After Logan said his goodbye to Maxine and the others, Valerie frowned a little at the word 'bed' but didn't complain or object as she swallowed the pills Maxine had handed her and drank more water. "But...I'm not tired." The shifter lied knowing her body said otherwise.

"Of course, thanks for stopping by! Drive safe." Caterina looked down at her friend with a small smile. "You may not feel tired, but I bet the second you lay down, you'll fall asleep."

"Yeah, it'll be easier to clean up the rest later," Charlotte agreed. "Or Logan's gonna make that job a little easier, awesome. Thanks! And have a good night!" She called after him. Turning back to Valerie, she echoed Cat's assurances. "As soon as your head hits the pillow, you're gonna sleep like a rock and it's gonna feel great." Until she woke up in the morning, of course.

Valerie frowned but nodded at the women's words. "Ohhhhhkay...." she mumbled smiling gently then and following Cat's and Charlie's lead for getting ready for bed. Sure the shifter would feel wonderful as her body hit the bed but Val was going to wish a thing called "morning" didn't exist the next day.

[forasecondtherewedwon]

Spideychelle as parents?

Here it comes―the fluffnami I warned you all about on Monday. You’ve officially waited too long to seek higher ground. The fluff is coming.

Kid-Me-NotPairing: Peter x Michelle (Spideychelle), Ned x Betty (Netty Pot)Rating: T (a very smol swear)Word count: 2060

They think about moving every year, but so far they haven’t.Peter knows it’s both of them, not just him, because sometimes he catches hiswife staring at a particular facet of their apartment, and when she looks athim, he goes, “I know,” and she makes a face like it’s doubtful that he’s readher mind.

The farthest out of the city they get on a regular basis isBetty and Ned’s corner of suburbia. Peter likes the drive and his wife likesthe mature trees, but not the ‘1950s American Dream capitalist bullshit vibe,’as she calls it. She also likes the blonde-bricked houses and Peter takes hisfoot off the gas whenever they pass one so that she has longer to admire themwithout having to state her preference out loud.

A trip to the Leeds’s is a regular thing for them, thoughmore frequent once summer rolls lazily around again. Flo is five now and goesinto a streaming shrill vibration of excitement at the mention of a visit.She’s been raised to call the two Leeds kids her cousins. The drive is just farenough that it used to put her to sleep, but these days the sedative propertiesof the car ride are only powerful enough to lull her small body into a consciousdoze. She exists in this low-power mode with a hand propped under her chin anda serious expression as she gazes out the window, not really noticing theflowers in people’s gardens or the dappled light on the perfect grey curbs, andnot really caring about what she’s missed. Peter’s great delight of the driveis catching glimpses of her in the rear-view mirror.

“I brought club soda for Betty,” his wife remarks idly fromthe passenger seat. Briefly, he grins to himself, rubbing his lip with athumbnail. Her posture is so like their daughter’s and at this point, Petercan’t remember who picked it up from whom.

“That’s really nice of you,” he says. “I’m sure she’llappreciate that.”

She goes by ‘Chelle’ now, which he feels has the sort ofheart-wrenching elegance of a ballet every time he hears it. It’s so adult.Frequently, Peter forgets they are both 34.

Pulling into the driveway is the catalyst for thelast-minute divvying up of who’s carrying what out of the car and which ofFlo’s toys are to be left in the backseat so she won’t scream if the other kidsget a hold of them. (Peter has been diligently working on his daughter’sjealous phase, but prefers not to test her restraint on what will already be ahigh-energy day.)

Chelle and he forsake the formality of the front door infavour of the gate, going straight into the backyard. He and Ned built the gatethemselves and Peter gives it a fond pat on his way through. Flo has alreadyraced ahead; it’s pointless to try to carry her. When she was a toddler, therewas less kicking, but the second her feet were lowered to the ground, she tookoff like a released wind-up toy.

“Hi,” he says to Ned. “Hi,” to Betty. And they’re saying“hi” in return, and so is Chelle, and hi’s are basically flying through the airlike mosquitos.

Sure enough, there are mosquitos flying through the air aswell because Betty’s grown sensitive to the scent of the citronella candlesthey usually scatter around the outdoor living space. In his spare time,Peter’s been working on synthesizing a replacement that will repel pestswithout the distinctive odour.

Arms full of bags of hotdog buns and an entire case of clubsoda (seriously, Chelle could’ve just bought Betty a two-litre bottle. How muchdoes his wife expect her to drink?!), Peter uses his foot to close the gatebehind him, but not before Ned’s devious cat bolts.

“Ohmigodohmigod,” Ned mumbles, flustered, but Betty justtouches him on the arm and steps around him.

“PalPY!” she calls, high and clear.

Emperor Palpatine whizzes back into the yard and the crisisis over. Peter and Ned laugh to themselves, slapping each other on theshoulder. Chelle has spread her armload of offerings on the patio table andwrapped Betty into a hug like a favourite draping blanket. She’s not asqueezing kind of hugger, his wife, but the sort to relax fully into it like avertical trust fall. There are few people she hugs.

“You’re a lifesaver,” Ned declares when Peter hands over thehotdog buns.

“Man, don’t tell me…” Peter begs.

“Yep,” Betty chimes in. “He forgets to buy them every time.”

She bites into a strawberry from a fruit tray she’s justwhisked out of the house. Chelle selects a large cube of honeydew melon,furtively stuffs it into her cheek, then bends down to make their daughterlaugh with a chipmunk impression as Flo slingshots back to her parents in asudden fit of nerves. This happens when the cousins are reintroduced. Sheclings to her mother’s leg as her smile quickly springs back up―Chelle’sstroking her wavy hair.

“Peter expects it by now,” Ned asserts, indicating what hisbest friend of 20+ years has brought.

“Nah, contingency plan, dude,” Peter avows.

“MJ,” Ned says, using the name that’s never unstuck for him(in fact, he’s the only one who still uses it), “club soda? Lame.”

Chelle rolls her eyes as their daughter torpedoes away fromher, chasing her cousins to the back fence.

“It’s for your pregnant wife. Don’t be selfish.”

“He’ll appreciate it later when I’m not sprinting to thebathroom to throw up my hotdog,” Betty predicts.

“Hon, that is so freaking gross. So, who’s hungry?” Ned askswith a chuckle.

He retrieves a pair of beers from an open cooler, rocky withice cubes, and Peter follows him over to the barbecue. Betty is close behind.

“Ned,” she protests, “I can do it.”

“The smoke can’t be good for the baby.”

“The other kids turned out fine. Ned makes up new rules foreach child,” Betty informs Peter with a wry smile.

“Peter wouldn’t let me go out on the balcony when I waspregnant with Flo,” Chelle calls over from where she’s setting out cutlery.They always eat first. Many, many summer afternoons have established theirpriorities.

Peter throws up his hands, careful not to slop the drinkhe’s just opened.

“It stressed me out!”

Chelle shrugs and gives him a smug smile.

“You got used to it.”

“I had to. You started sitting out there every night whenyou were on the phone to Betty or May or your mom.”

She grins in remembered victory as Charlie hurtles intoPeter’s side.

“Hello,” says a kid with Betty’s hair and at least onemissing tooth.

“Hey, what’s up, buddy?” Peter squats and does theParker-Leeds handshake. It transcends generations now, which is pretty cool.

“Are you watching your sister?” Betty quizzes her.

“Yes,” says Charlie, three-year-old sister nowhere in hervicinity.

“Call her like you call the cat,” Ned suggests, attention onraising the lid of the barbecue to shuffle the meat around, burgers crumblingat the edges, hotdogs reluctant to lift from the grill.

“Ooh, do we think Daddy’s in trouble for that one?” Bettychecks with Charlie, who grins, swishing her neatly braided pigtails.

Their other child, Daisy, comes staggering through thegrass, hand clutched in Flo’s. Peter feels a thrill of pride, watching theirdaughter play the big sister.

“We’re going inside,” Flo announces. “Charlie has a newLego.”

“Awesome,” Peter tells Charlie, eyes lighting up. “How manypieces?”

“I might need to snag one of your club sodas,” Chelleinforms Betty. “I feel suddenly nauseous with déjà vu.”

The wives laugh hard at the expense of the nerds theymarried.

“But seriously,” Peter whispers. “How many?”

“One. Hundred. Seventy. Four,” Charlie says, enunciatingwith care to increase the impact of how impressive this is. He thinks she couldread the announcements when she gets to high school, like her mom did, butthat’s a ways off yet. The kid’s only seven.

Flo, tired of being in her father’s company yet not thecenter of his attention, falls dramatically onto his hunched back.

“Why is it called Legos.” She says it like a demand, not aquestion.

“Uh, I don’t know. Lemme look it up…”

Before he can get his phone from his pocket, the nextinquiry has left her mouth. He can see that the Lego investigation has beentemporarily derailed.

“Why is my name ‘Florence’?”

“This is her thing right now,” Chelle explains to theirfriends, shaking an open bag of pretzels in Betty’s direction. “Questioningwhat everything’s called.”

“I know this one,” Betty teases. Peter glances over hisshoulder to watch Flo’s eyes light up with curiosity. He rubs her warm forearm.“It’s because Uncle Ned and I, and your parents, went on a trip to a countrynamed Italy and, while we were there, they realized that they loved each other.Then,” she goes on (Peter can tell by his daughter’s face that she isenthralled), “your mom and dad went back there when they were grown up and theywere in a city called Florence when they decided to get married.”

“Because he asked her to?” Flo clarifies.

“That’s right,” Betty praises.

“Barely managed it,” Ned critiques under his breath.

“Thanks, pal,” Peter snarks back.

His best friend glances down at him and they share a grin,then Ned reaches out for Betty’s hand and reels her in to kiss her cheek.They’re romantics, both of them. Betty probably remembers the moment ofengagement better than either Peter or Chelle, and she wasn’t even there.

“Why is Mommy’s name ‘Chelle’?” Flo wonders.

Peter straightens up to grab a pretzel. He sets his beer onthe fold-out ledge of the barbecue, then picks up Daisy, who is looking forlorn,so far below the tall people.

“Michelle,” Chellereminds her. “That’s because Grandma watched too much Full House while she was waiting for me.”

“Where were you?” Charlie asks, confused.

“Still in her belly,” his wife explains. She points atBetty’s rounded stomach. “Like your brother.”

“Wha’ ‘bow you, Da’?” Flo asks, wandering back from thetable as she chomps a carrot stick smothered in probably too much ranchdressing.

Peter sticks his tongue out at Daisy to make her gigglebefore turning to his daughter with a confused frown.

“What about me?”

“Why is your name ‘Spider-Man’?”

Chelle howls with laughter while Peter attempts to handlethe situation. Ned and Betty have both known his secret for years (there areonly so many excuses he can give Betty for needing to abruptly leave theirhouse on foot with a ragged backpack), but Flo doesn’t really get thedifference between saying it in front of them and saying it to literally anyoneelse.

“Are we supposed to talk about that?” he tests her.

“No. I’ll only tell Charlie.” Quickly, she bounces to hercousin’s side and, over Charlie’s giggling, Peter hears Flo’s high voicesaying, “My dad’s Spider-Man.”

“That’s definitely talking about it,” he says.

“Ok,” she is quick to agree with a mischievous smile, “I’llonly tell Palpy.”

Flo darts off after the cat, who has decided on a franticrun across the yard. Charlie helpfully tries to copy her mother’s method ofcalling the cat, but Emperor Palpatine is not convinced by the imitation.

Peter spins Daisy around once before letting the toddlerinto the fray as well.

“She’s so much like you,” Betty observes to Chelle, watchingFlo track the cat with determination. “Brave, unstoppable.”

Ned snorts.

“Nah, she’s like Peter.”

“Watch it,” Peter warns jokingly, picking up his beer.

“I was gonna say because she has so much energy, dude, duh.”

“Well, that’s true,” Chelle says, walking to Peter andpropping her elbow on his shoulder. He holds her around the waist, longing tocradle her closer than social norms permit. “I don’t know what we’re going todo with two of them.”

For a moment, there is no sound but the sizzling hotdogs(Ned’s probably burning them―Betty is the true grill-master of the Leedsfamily) and the shouts of three little girls. Then, Betty’s delighted gasp andNed’s pure shriek of joy.

Peter’s beer sweats in his hand. He has never been happier.

[katedrakeohd]

#Wacky Drabbles

Here's part 3 of my Kate and Drake short series where they're visiting Kate's Mom in Oregon.

Find the previous chapter here

Written for @emceesynonymroll and her #Wacky Drabbles game

Other Wacky Drabblers:

@jessiembruno @brightpinkpeppercorn @jovialyouthmusic @sirbeepsalot @bobasheebaby @burnsoslow

Prompt #3 I'll be home in an hour

Word count: approx. 1200

Rated: F for fluffy 😊

---------------------------------------

Something in the Oven

After collecting their scrambled box of baked goods from the car, Drake and Kate follow Lorraine into the house. As Kate's Mother holds the door for them the harried cat from earlier appears from its hiding place next to the porch and bolts inside. With a sigh of annoyance, Lorraine looks down and protests, “Lester! You damn cat, you're nothing but trouble.”

Kate peers around the box she's carrying just in time to see the blur known as Lester skitter out of sight. “I take it Lester isn't supposed to be in the house.”

Lorraine pulls the door shut, shaking her head. “He's our only outdoor cat and usually spends days at a time prowling the yard for mice and other little things he can catch. Whenever he comes into the house he disturbs the peace among the indoor crew. Eventually there'll be a minor scuffle and I'll have to shoo him back outside. But in the meantime he'll probably hide like the rest of ‘em.”

Drake stands awkwardly next to Kate, casting his eyes around the space and trying to spy any of the numerous cats that were supposed to live there. He was used to living with dogs that eagerly welcomed him at the door, housecats were a new experience for him. Apart from the large basket of cat toys he saw next to the sofa there was no sign of the feline residents, and he was surprised to not smell the presence of them either. The interior of the house smelled clean and fresh and woodsy like a log cabin should. As he follows Kate and her Mother into the kitchen he catches the pleasant scent of apples and cinnamon baking.

“It smells like your Mom has one upped us in the bakery department Kate.” Drake says as they set their box on the counter.

“Yeah Mom, you could have mentioned you had a pie in the oven when I said we were bringing goodies.” Kate jokes.

Lorraine holds her hands up and laughs, “Hey, in my defense I didn't know you two were coming before this morning. Besides the pie is for dessert later.”

She puts the broom away and then shoos them out of the kitchen, “Please make yourself at home while I go freshen up. I've been tidying the house like a mad woman since you called me this morning. It's not everyday that this humble corner of Oregon is graced by the presence of a bona fide Duke and Duchess.” With a smirk and a halfhearted curtsey she heads for the bedroom.

Kate grimaces slightly at the emphasis that her Mom puts on their titles. She felt guilty for keeping the past several months of her life a secret from her. It had been a chaotic whirlwind to say the least, and the vast geographic distance and many time zones between Oregon and Cordonia hadn't exactly helped. The last time she and her Mom had spoken on the phone she was still living in New York City. Kate wasn't sure how well or if she paid attention to foreign news or politics. Drake gives Kate's hand a reassuring squeeze. In the relative quiet of the house he feels the need to lower his voice, “Your Mom seems nice.”

Kate lets out the breath she's holding with a nervous grin as she squeezes his hand back. “She is most of the time. But I'm fully prepared for her natural skepticism and sarcasm to appear at some point. Expect to be grilled like the proverbial Thanksgiving goose over dinner. I've suddenly shown up married to a guy from Europe with a fancy title in front of my name. No doubt it's a little bit much for her to wrap her head around.”

Drake grins, wrapping his arm around Kate’s shoulders and kissing her on the temple, “I think I can manage whatever verbal jabs your Mom sends my way. I married a New Yorker remember? Besides you know me, I eat snark for breakfast.”

With a smirk of her own Kate leans into his chest, releasing a sigh of contentment when his strong arms wrap around her tightly. “I knew I married you for a reason. You're my hero.”

“And I have the scars to prove it. C'mon let's explore the house while your Mom's busy. You know how much I love log cabins.” Drake slides his hand into hers again and gives her a conspiratorial wink.

Up in the loft bedroom Lorraine is talking to Carol on the phone while she rummages through her closet. “What do you wear to dinner when you're trying too hard to impress someone?” Lorraine sighs in annoyance as she cradles the phone between her shoulder and her cheek.

“So Katherine and her husband have already arrived then? So tell me what he's like?” Carol’s voice holds an air of amusement and wonder.

Lorraine makes a face and shrugs her shoulders, almost dropping the phone which she catches in her hand as she whines back, “I don't know. Do you have any idea how long it's been since I paid attention to what a guy looks like? I've barely spoken to him.”

Pulling a blouse and a pair of jeans out of the closet, she tosses them onto the bed, still uncertain how to dress up her meager wardrobe to impress a Duke and Duchess. At the same time she's wondering why she was bothering in the first place. Shaking her head she strips out of her comfy sweats and throws them aside. On the other end of the phone call Carol presses for more information.

“Oh come on Rainey, if you're fussing around trying to dress to impress then spill it. Is he handsome and pretentious? Is he ugly and boring? I’m dying with curiosity. Besides I haven't met your daughter yet either. I've only seen pictures.”

With a sigh, Lorraine cradles the phone next to her ear again as she pulls on her jeans.

“Well to be honest, you wouldn't know he was European or a Duke at all. He dresses pretty casual like any other guy. Until he opened his mouth and spoke I would have assumed he was American. His accent is unusual but his voice is nice. He's more rugged than refined. I suppose you could call him handsome.”

Carol laughs in her ear, “Uh Huh so you didn't notice him at all. I'll be home in an hour. Should I pick up a bottle of wine to go with dinner?"

“Sure. We're having pasta, but I'm not sure what kind of wine they like so get a red and a white."

Walking hand in hand Drake and Kate explore the downstairs. They find another bedroom down the hall from the kitchen. As Kate pushes the door open, an orangey colored cat streaks out and then runs down the hall passed them. “Well I guess that's cat number one.” Drake says with a chuckle.

“Aww, such a cutie.” Kate says, watching the cat with a longing expression.

Drake notices how her face lights up and scolds her playfully, “No more pets for you. I know we have a big house and everything but I draw the line at two corgis underfoot. Besides..” He wraps his arms around Kate from behind and places a soft kiss on her cheek, his hand straying down to rest on her belly, “We're going to have a little critter of our own in a few months.”

With a smile Kate looks down and laces her fingers through his. “Yes I know. And I can't wait to tell Mom over dinner.”

Continue to the next part

[placingglaciers]

Stray Happiness

Title: Stray Happiness

Genre: AU, Platonic, Fluff

Word Count: 1, 376

Warnings: None!

Description: In which Dan has been taking care of a stray black cat in secret for three weeks now and Phil, his roommate, hates cats and the very idea of having a pet and finds out.

Author’s Note: I’ve been dormant lately (as you could probably tell), so I thought what a better way to come back than to write a fic based off of a simple one-act play I had to write in my creative writing class last semester! (Please remember that this is fiction.)

Perhaps it was the way that the morning sun painted the immense sky with warmth, or how the toaster browned his bread just right this time, or even how the irksome repetitive barking from the dog next door seemed to have…stopped. The spring birds chirped in the trees above; their absence went on for far too long, but their presence becoming a sign of something new, something welcomed, something finally beginning. The air was comfortably warm; a thin blanket you wouldn’t mind being wrapped up in after climbing out of bed from a restful slumber. The smell of rain was in the air, but that wouldn’t be for until the afternoon when everything was hazy and minutes disguised themselves as hours. But for now, the orange juice was cold, the toast was buttered, and the morning silence was just loud enough to complete this little world. This was a Monday morning. A pity that no one would take the time to appreciate.

               For nearly half an hour, this little stoned back patio would be Daniel’s. Philip didn’t have his photography class until ten, so he was still in bed. The old green and white webbed aluminum chair supported Daniel as he sat, patiently waiting. He was wearing a floral orange kimono over his pajamas—a color he suddenly found intriguing and exciting. Soon all that was remaining of the toast was crumbs and the orange juice still had a bit to go. He thought pouring it in a wine glass would make him seem fancy. Why not? Was there a rule against it? He took a deep breath and sighed, appreciating the blue, cloudless sky above him. In this little window of time, he could do anything he wanted without being bothered or questioned. Every morning he tried to use it to his advantage.

               Daniel set his orange juice down on the round glass outdoor table and stood up. He walked over to the wooden bench on the side of the patio and lifted its seat to the storage compartment. He took out a small paper bag of dry cat food and a slightly discolored Tupperware bowl. He set the bowl down and poured the food, hoping the sound would summon the cat. Once everything was put away, he sat back in his chair again and waited.

               Only a few minutes passed and rustling from the tall bushes in the corner of the small yard could be heard. Daniel had to laugh to himself for how disproportionate the loud sounds were to the size of the small cat. Soon, a furry black figure emerged from the shadows and meowed all his way toward the food bowl. The cat only ate a few bites before visiting Daniel, rubbing its body along his pajama pant legs. Daniel reached down and petted the cat, of which he enthusiastically responded. Daniel smiled widely and said a few sentences filled with love and curiosity. After a few seconds, the cat returned to the food and Daniel was once again filled with some sort of happiness.

               “Alright, I’m leaving!” Philip’s voice could be heard from inside. “I’m going to be late.”

               Daniel’s eyes widened and his body froze in the chair. His eyes darted toward the oblivious cat who was finishing the remainder of the food. Quickly, Daniel got up from the chair and walked toward the screen door.

               “I was wondering, what do you—” Philip walked out onto the patio but stopped speaking once he saw Daniel’s ashamed demeanor.

               “I-I thought class didn’t start until ten,” Daniel stammered and carefully wrapped his kimono around himself and retied it again.

               “I’m meeting with a few friends first to study,” Philip said slowly, trying to see what Daniel was hiding.

               Daniel let out a laugh, “it’s photography, what do you need to study for?” His words slowed once he noticed Philip caught him red-handed.

               “What is that?” Philip asked him sternly.

               Daniel backed away slowly and protectively toward the cat and swallowed, trying to be calm. “Shelby is a who, not a what.”

                “Shel—it has a name?!”

               “Shelby is a he, not an it,” he responded just as calmly as before. This was it now. This was where it all ended. How did things become so messy all of a sudden? If only Philip minded his own business every now and then, things would still be orderly and predictable.

               “When were you going to tell me this?” Philip had his hands on his hips. Undoubtedly his study date was no longer a priority. “How long has this been going on?”

               Daniel picked up the black cat and held him in his arms. Shelby purred in response. Daniel kept his eyes on the cat. “I was going to tell you…eventually,” he confessed sincerely, “but you’re never really here and you don’t really care about anything I do, so I thought it wouldn’t matter anyway.” He finally looked at Philip in desperation, eyes wide and his breathing fast. “Look, Shelby needs me. He was barely alive when he first got here!”

               “And when was that?”

               Blood rushed to his cheeks, “three weeks ago.”

               Philip’s eyebrows rose and he took a step back. “You need to start telling me these things! Because before we start having a pet—”

               “Shelby is a friend, not a pet.”

               “Well, whatever he is, he can’t stay here. Cats are mean and selfish and expensive and they pee indoors, and they tear up the furniture, and, and this one especially is bad luck!” Philip ran his fingers through his dark hair and sighed, “Besides, I’m allergic.”

               Daniel tightened his lips and rolled his eyes. Hot anger boiled up inside him. Why wasn’t Philip on his side? Weren’t they best friends? Couldn’t he tell how much everything has changed in the past three weeks? Life didn’t hurt so much anymore. “It’s a good thing you don’t take care of him then! Shelby hasn’t done one thing to you! You haven’t even noticed him until now.” He decided to put down the cat and brush off the black hair on his kimono. “Don’t you…don’t you have class or something?”

               Philip quieted down once he saw how distressed his best friend was. “I’m sorry. I’m just really surprised. I wouldn’t exactly consider you as a caregiver-type.”

               Daniel shrugged and kept his eyes on the fluttering birds in the trees. A few butterflies were about, enjoying the flowers in the warm sun. He squint his eyes up at the bright sky. “Maybe I found a purpose. Is that such a bad thing?”

               Philip remained quiet and stood closer to Daniel. He wasn’t as angry as he was before, just…bothered. He noticed the cat giving himself a bath in the grass and he quickly averted his eyes to their neighbor’s tacky outdoor décor. “Is that true?”

               Daniel glanced over at Philip and then back at Shelby. He was enjoying this abrupt honesty. This usually didn’t happen unless it’s late at night or when either one of them were drunk. It felt nice and real. “I-I don’t know. I just know that waking up is easier now.”

               “What if…what if he starts bringing all his friends?” Confliction was coated in Philip’s words. Daniel could tell he was really fighting the idea, but he had a feeling he was going to win. “We’re not becoming a bed-and-breakfast for cats, Dan.”

               “Well, that’s the problem,” Daniel said sincerely. “I don’t think he has any friends.”

               Suddenly, Shelby came running back to them, this time rubbing against Philip’s legs. Philip hesitated and then slowly lowered his hand down toward the cat. Shelby sniffed it and rubbed his face against it. A smile creeped along Philip’s face, but he tried to conceal it from Daniel. His allergies were beginning to act up, but he ignored them for the time being. “You’re happier now?”

               “I don’t know what I feel,” Daniel shrugged. “I just know it’s different. A good different.”

               “Well…” he sighed and glanced over at the pathetic cat bowl. “I think we need to get him something different to eat out of. That Tupperware belongs to my mother and she would not appreciate that.” He then smiled genuinely at Daniel who could only smile back in return.

[thebisexualmandalorian]

Question 1 for Sam, 2 for Cody, 3 for Garbage Cat, 4 for Grey, 5 for Sam and so on!

Under a cut for length!

1. Name? 

Sam, Samson, Samwise, Sammy, Old Man, Handsome Boy, Sweet Baby.

2. Fur color?

Cody is ORANGE.  THE ORANGEST BOY.

3. Any family you know (other than you)

Answered here!

4. Age?

Grey’s almost two!

5. Favorite toy?

Sam likes fishing toys a lot.

6. Nicknames?

BABY BOY, MY SON

7. Cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

The most problematic of faves.  Garbage Cat is made of cuteness and straight-up evil.  She wants to destroy every other cat and also me.

8. Length of fluff?

Short!  Grey has a short, very silky coat.

9. Any funny habits?

Sam needs head bumps all the time.  Whenever he sees me for the first time every day, I have to sit down so he can stretch up and bump his forehead against mine.

10. How old were they when you met?

We think Cody was around eight months.

11. What does their food bowl look like?

Dollar Tree cat bowl with pictures of fish on it, or straight out of the bucket, lol.

12. Indoor or outdoor cat?

We’re trying to transition Grey to being an inside cat.

13. Recent picture?

14. Old picture?

15. Cuddly?

Garbage Cat only cuddles when I pick her up so she can watch mom cook.

16. Ever changed their name?

Nope!  He’s always been Grey.

18. Eye color?

Sam has the prettiest green eyes.

19. How do they express love for you?

Cody follows me everywhere, screaming, and he’ll fling himself into my lap.  He stretches up to try to grab my hand.  He purrs.  He is the lovingest baby boy.

20. How do you express love for them?

I feed Garbage Cat wet food and treats and throw bouncy balls for her. 

21. Any theories on what breed?

Whatever bizarre breed gave Grey a curved, pointy nose and made him smol.

22. Do they ever wake you up?

Sam does wake me up sometimes, lol.

23. How much do they meow?

So much.  Cody loves to squeak at me when he thinks I’m not paying attention.

24. Any hiding spots?

Garbage Cat got her nickname from sleeping in the trash can, but she also likes to snuggle under blankets.  We have to pat the beds to make sure she isn’t asleep under the quilt before we sit down.

25. Do they enjoy guests?

Nope.  Grey can warm up to people, but he gets spooked when they’re new.

26. Lofty objects to sit on?

Sam doesn’t really like being up high, mostly because he’s an Elderly Gentlecat and it’s hard for him to get up and down.

27. Wear a collar? (and describe collar?)

Cody had a sparkly red collar, but it disappeared and I keep forgetting to replace it.

28. How much shedding?

Garbage Cat sheds so much, jesus christ.

29. Do they enjoy brushing?

Hahaha nope, Grey hates it.

30. Ever drink from the toilet?

Sam is far too fancy for that.  (Also we keep the lids closed so they can’t, lol)

31. How do they get your attention?

Cody flings himself into my legs and tries to climb me. 

32. Embarrassing thing they’ve done?

Embarrassing for me or her?  Garbage Cat has no shame.  

33. Weirdest thing they try to eat?

Grey doesn’t really like anything super weird, but he has stolen the breading from chicken fingers.

34. Are they like your siblings, children, or friends?

Sam is my best friend.

35. What time do they eat breakfast?

Cody usually eats around six in the morning, when dad feeds them.

36. Do you cut their nails?

Dude, I don’t want to die.

37. Do you think they understand you?

I look at Grey and I just know that there’s nothing going on in that tiny, tiny head.  

38. Ever make fun of them?

How could I make fun of someone as dignified as Sam?

39. Do you take their picture often?

I take so many pictures of Cody.

40. Ever hiss at you?

Garbage Cat doesn’t bother hissing, she skips straight to attempted homicide.

41. Ever try to scratch or bite you?

Grey would never.  

42. If you try to grab their paw, what do they do?

Sam bites for that kind of offense.  He hates having his gigantic snowshoe paws touched.

43. Do they ever eat bugs?

Yep.  Cody looooves chasing crane flies.

44. Canned or dry food?

Both!  Garbage Cat gets a specially selected diet of grain-free dry and wet food because she is a special baby who’s allergic to at least one grain. 

45. Weight?

We haven’t weighed Grey but he is Tiny.  

46. Ever got lost?

Sam’s given us a few scares.

47. Do you buy them presents?

Yep!

48. Do they respond when you call?

Garbage Cat only responds to the sound of a can opening or a treat bag being shaken.

49. Do they ever see other cats?

Grey has his family outside, and Cody is his Bestest Friend Ever.  He tries to be friends with Garbage Cat and Sam, but that way only ends in sadness.

50. Declawed?

HELL NO.

51. Funniest expression?

The look she gave us the day we brought her home:

52. Favorite place to be pet?

Grey loves head scritches.

53. Worst thing they’ve destroyed?

Sam is a chronic pisser-on of scratching pads, so we can’t have those in the house anymore.

54. Give them a head kiss.

Cody squeaked at me.

55. What time of the year is most exciting for them?

Garbage Cat loves cold weather.  She runs laps when it gets below 70 degrees.

56. Are they good at hunting real prey?

One time, I went out to the back yard to bring Grey in, and he was eating a rat as big as him.  So... yeah.

57. Do they ever attack nothing?

Sam is pretty chill tbh.

58. What are they doing right now?

Just chilling.

59. How long have you had them?

Since October of 2015.  Garbage Cat was my halloween kitten.

60. If you could have them stay as a kitten forever, would you?

I mean... Grey basically is a kitten.  He’s smol and full of energy.

61. Ever baby-talk to them?

All the goddamn time.

62. Favorite napping position?

Cody loves to sleep stretched out on his back, with his paws curled up against his chest.

63. Have you ever stepped on their paw?

YES AND I FELT LIKE A MONSTER

64. Ever tripped you on stairs?

We don’t have stairs but I am 100% certain that if we did, Grey would trip me on them.

65. Any ear hair?

SAM HAS THE BEST EAR TUFTS

66. Favorite view from a window?

Cody doesn’t really like windows that much.

67. Describe why they are precious.

Garbage Cat is so funny, and she has the cutest little mrrps when she’s watching people cook or when she wakes up.

68. Fit the cat stereotype?

Grey is more like a very strange and friendly ferret than a cat.

69. Chaotic neutral?

Sam is Lawful Good.

70. Do they enjoy following/ keeping you company?

Holy shit yes.  Cody always has to be where I am, and I can’t do anything without him getting up to follow me.

71. Are you their favorite human? 

HAHAHA NO.  I barely rank in the top ten, and Garbage Cat only knows like six people.

72. Do they like tv?

Grey will watch bird videos for hours if I put them on.

73. Favorite noise to make?

This horrible parrot-like squawk.  I love it.

74. If they were a Neko Atsume cat, what would their momento be?

A small heart-shaped plush.

[mysimstory-blog]

The Sims 4 “Homescapes” Challenge

THE GOAL OF THE CHALLENGE:

Due to unfortunate events, you became homeless, lost your money and everything else you owned. Luckily for you, a distant relative recently passed away and left you their house, a small amount of money, as well as... all their junk. You can make your fortune back from it but you must turn that place into a home, clean all the rubbish and restore all the rooms before the real estate agent would have a look at it. Or you can make it your own home, settle down and grow your family. Either way, the house needs serious work and your funds are limited, so it's going to be quite the challenge. Are you up for it?

SETUP

You start off with a household of 1 Sim (brand new Sim with no skills or career levels, YA or A), a pre-built home with LOCKED rooms full of junk and 500 simoleons. The goal is to unlock, clean and restore all the rooms in order to have a fully furnished and functional home for your household, without your sim dying of exhaustion, starvation or embarrassment.

After you moved in your Sim and BEFORE you start the gameplay, money must be set to 500 simoleons and all doors inside the house must be set to "Lock for Everyone" (including any doors that lead to the backyard, if any).

The only cheats allowed for this challenge are the money cheat (for when you need to subtract amounts from your household funds) and the “Move Objects” cheat. Any other cheats are to be used ONLY in cases of emergency (sim is stuck and needs to be reset, death caused by fire, drowning, disease, death that occurred when your sim was not on the lot or other causes not directly related to their needs).

HOW IT WORKS (general rules):

You will use your starting amount as reference for the gameplay. Earn simoleons to unlock the rooms and clean them up before decorating them and giving each room a function.

You will have one room of your own to start off with. The room will contain the bare minimum for your sim to survive, according to the list provided. You are allowed to travel with your Sim to fill all their needs.

All the other rooms in the house will be locked and will contain all sorts of "junk" objects (crates, boxes, clutter, etc.) that need to be cleaned.

In order to unlock and clean the rooms, your Sim must earn simoleons and complete aspirations as follows:

Every 500 simoleons earned/aspiration task completed = clean 1 junk object in an UNLOCKED room;

Every 1000 simoleons earned + aspiration milestone completed = unlocks 1 room (Set the door of the room to "Unlock");

IF an aspiration is completed* (all tasks and milestones) you are given the possibility to fully clean one unlocked room.

*For EASY mode, whenever players complete an aspiration, they will also add 5000 simoleons to their funds using the money cheat. This is the only instance in the game when the money cheat will be used to add funds.

Whenever you take action - unlocking doors and removing junk from the rooms - the amount corresponding to each action must be subtracted from your household’s total funds using the money cheat. (testingcheats on -> money X where X is the new amount your household will have after taking action) OR using the UI Cheat Extension mod.

You can unlock, clean and refurbish ONE room at a time. Once a room is unlocked, you must fully clean it before you start decorating. In order to unlock the next room, you must finish working on the previous one.

Cleaning a room means moving the junk objects to the family inventory. Money earned from selling those objects DO NOT count towards your goal (it’s considered junk regardless of their use). After you finish the game you may sell the junk (or use it - one man’s trash is another man’s treasure).

NOTE: We have found that some objects, when resized (“Cats & Dogs“ crates for example), can cause your game to glitch. Your sim might get stuck or might not perform actions for no apparent reason. This can be due to the resized objects being in too close of a proximity to the object your sim is trying to us and can continue to happen even after you placed said junk object in your family inventory (for cleanup). In this case, the object can be permanently deleted.

A room is considered “Done” if, after it was cleaned, it meets all the requirements for its specific function, as follows:

ROOM FUNCTION REQUIREMENTS* (for a household of 1 Sim):

LIVING ROOM: 1 sofa (loveseat or large), 1 armchair, 1 coffee table/side table, TV (wall-mounted, on the coffee table or with TV stand), 1 audio device, 1 plant, 1 decorative object (from the "Paintings" or "Statues" categories in Build Mode);

KITCHEN: 3 counters (normal, island or a mix of both), 1 fridge, 1 stove, 1 sink, 1 garbage bin, 1 plant, 1 decorative object from the “Clutter” or “Miscellaneous” categories in Build Mode;

DINING ROOM: 1 table with 2 chairs OR 2 island counters with 2 stools, 1 bar/audio device, 1 plant, 1 rug;

BEDROOM(S): 1 bed (single or double), 1 bedside table, 1 dresser, 1 mirror, 1 plant, 1 rug;

BATHROOM(S): toilet, 1 sink, shower/bathtub/bathtub with shower, 1 mirror, 1 towel rack;

STUDY ROOM/AREA: 1 desk/table, 1 chair, 1 computer, 1 bookcase, 1 hobby object, 1 plant, 1 decorative object (from the "Paintings" or "Statues" categories in Build Mode);

YARD: 1 bench, 1 BBQ, 2 outdoor lights, 1 tree/shrub, 3 flower beds/1 flowery bush;

*The list states the minimum number of objects required but feel free to add more.

Your house must have at least one of the rooms mentioned above for it to be considered functional. Multi-purpose rooms (kitchen and dining for example) are acceptable, continue reading for details).

How you earn money is up to you. You can pick any trait, aspiration or career to help you earn money faster, you can collect, craft or provide services for money, you can travel or build your own store or vet clinic. Anything but cheating. However you have to stick to one aspiration and one career at a time so chose wisely when you start. Once an aspiration is completed, move on to the next one of your choosing.

You can unlock rooms in whatever order you want. Keep in mind that your sim must be able to access the room you are planning to clean and refurbish (even though you don’t really need them to clean a room, it kind of defeats the purpose if the sim cannot access the room you are working on).

The game is considered "Won" (end game) if you have unlocked and restored all the rooms, making sure you have a fully functional home that accommodates  your entire household.

ADDITIONAL RULES (please continue reading):

Additional house levels (basements included) are areas that become “available” to you after you finished restoring the rooms on the ground floor. If you are playing with a house that has multiple levels, finish the ground floor before moving on to the next. Like with rooms, levels will be completed one by one.

You can expand upwards or downwards if you need additional rooms to complete your house. You can also expand existing rooms to accommodate multiple room functions (kitchen and dining area for example) BUT only after you fully cleaned the room.

You can build new rooms to your house as needed. A new room can only be built AFTER you finish restoring a room you were working on and BEFORE moving on to the next. New rooms must be accessible to your sim (not connected to locked rooms or placed away from the main house). You can chose to work on the new built room right after you placed it OR you can move on to another room that needs to be unlocked and cleaned (you can’t do both).

You can combine the room functions as long as you have the minimum number of objects from all the room functions you want to put together. (i.e. if you want to make a kitchen and dining space, you must place all the objects listed for "Kitchen" AND for "Dining room" in order for it to count).

You can only unlock rooms that your sim can access (rooms that are connected to the starting room or an already finished room).

You can start placing objects after all junk objects in the room have been moved to the family inventory. Any object that was in the room when you started the game is considered junk except for lights as long as they are ceiling or wall lights.

When decorating a room, you are allowed to place any other objects in the room at any given time AFTER you clean it. You won't be able to move on to the next room if you don't meet the requirements for the room's specific function. Your sim is free to use the room even if it’s still a work in progress. You are allowed to use the “bb.moveobjects on” cheat.

What function each room has is up to you. Once you cleaned the room and decided the function, you cannot change it until the end of the game. If you decide on a multi-function room, you can work on both functions (i.e. kitchen and dining) at the same time but you can only move to the next room once BOTH functions are completed.

You cannot modify the room's layout, add, move around or remove any windows, columns, half-walls, railings, stairs or fireplaces that were already there when you started the game until you finish. You can, however, modify their colors and move and change the door. You can modify the walls and floors however you like but only on the interior of the house. You cannot change the exterior of the house in any way.

You can move the windows up or down if it interferes with the function of the room (i.e. if you have windows on the same wall as the kitchen cabinets, you can move them up or down so they don’t get blocked by the counters).

You cannot move the rooms around until the end of the game.

You cannot place rooms outside of the main house (in order to make shacks, laundry rooms, etc.) until the end of the game.

Rooms with functions other than the ones mentioned in the rules (laundry room, entertainment room, etc.) can be added only at the end of the game. Nurseries can be set up in the master bedroom or in a separate room that will become the child’s bedroom.

Hallways can be used to connect the rooms and will not contain any junk objects. They will be furnished throughout the game. The starter room can be connected to the entrance through a hallway.

Custom Content (CC) is not allowed if you build houses for the challenge for other players to use. Mods are allowed as long as they don’t interfere with the gameplay (i.e. mods that generate random events or make your sims act whacky, etc.). Cheats are allowed with restriction. You can use the money cheat to set the starting amount for your household and modify it as you progress in the challenge, you can use the “moveobejcts” cheat for decoration, you can use the debug cheat when creating your house or any other cheat that is useful in emergency situations ONLY (reset your sims, prevent untimely death, etc).

PETS

Because it can be quite lonely for your sim sometimes, especially when working on such a challenging project as refurbishing an entire house, you can add a pet to your household at any given time, so long as you can provide for them and stick to only one (cat, dog, fox, raccoon or one of the new rodents). You can add a pet to your household by adopting a stray or using the “Adopt” function on your computer (NOT through CAS). The pet must have a food bowl, a place to sleep (your sim’s bed counts if it’s a double bed or a sofa), a toy to play with and, if it’s a cat, a litter box and scratching pole.

If you do decide you want a furry little companion, make sure to take really good care of it. If it runs away or is taken away from you, you cannot adopt another until the end of the game, unless it dies of old age.

ADDING HOUSEHOLD MEMBERS

You can add members to your household by asking them to move in, by marrying or by giving birth. You cannot edit the household to add more sims but you CAN edit your existing sims. The new members are allowed to have jobs, collect objects, craft and sell to help you earn more money and you must provide comfortable areas for them (add extra seating, beds, decoration, etc).

Once you add a new member, the room function requirements change as follows:

ROOM FUNCTION REQUIREMENTS (per additional household member):

ALL objects from 1-sim household PLUS:

LIVING ROOM: 1 extra seating, 1 extra decorative object (ANY category);

KITCHEN: 1 extra counter AND:

If sim is toddler: + 1 toddler chair;

DINING ROOM: 1 extra seat OR 1 extra island counter with stool, 1 extra plant;

BEDROOM(S):

If sim is GF/Spouse - existing bed must be changed to double (if single), 1 extra bedside table;

If sim is BFF/roommate - they must have their own room with the aforementioned requirements;

If sim is newborn - add cradle in the parents bedroom, 1 changing table;

If sim is toddler or older - see "Kid's Bedroom";

KID’S BEDROOM: 1 toddler/ single bed (depending on child's age - toddler bed will be changed to single bed after aging without it having any effect on the gameplay), 1 bedside table, 1 toy box, 2 toys, 1 activity table, 1 rug, 1 plant, 1 decorative object (preferably for kids);

BATHROOM: 1 extra sink, 1 extra towel rack, (if you only have 1 shower/bathtub) 1 bathtub/shower respectively OR change to bathtub with shower;

STUDY: 1 extra hobby object;

YARD: nothing.

BUILDING THE HOUSE AND ROOMS:

If you want to build houses for this challenge or want to follow the challenge and build your own, here are some guidelines on how to do it.

The difficulty of the challenge is also set by the number of rooms your household starts with. Once you have your house in place with the locked rooms, you can make little to no changes so chose wisely. The more rooms there are, the more challenging it will be as you must complete all rooms of the house in order to win.  Houses with various levels of difficulty will be provided.

When building a house, you can add any number of rooms with the minimum of 2 (the starting room + a locked room).

The starting room can be of any size and shape and must have the bare minimum for your sim to survive, as follows:

1 single/double bed,

1 fridge;

1 stove;

1 counter;

1 sink;

1 toilet either in a separate room or in the same room surrounded by the tallest half-walls (I found that with those walls sims can do their business without dying of embarrassment; yes, that can happen);

After the starting room is built, any room added to the house must have a door (set to "Lock" upon starting the challenge) with a given number of "junk" objects.

Junk objects can be crates or boxes (like the fruit crates in the base game, the boxes in "Get to Work" or "Cats and Dogs"), the damaged objects from "City living", boxes of clutter or wall posters that appear as junk (the computer parts object for example). Even the spider webs from "Vampires" or the wall cracks from "Vampires" and "Jungle Adventure" count. Objects that look modern or are expensive cannot count as junk but the cheapest ones do. Get creative and find objects as useless and as garbage-looking as possible :).

Once an object is placed in a “Locked” room, it is rendered as junk, will be moved to the family inventory during gameplay and will not be used until the end of the game (regardless of how useful it is).

Lights are NOT considered junk as long as they are ceiling or wall lamps.

After placing the “junk” objects, you can decorate the rest of the house whichever way you want,  both  on the inside and on the outside.

You can add railings, stairs, window panes, fireplaces, fountains, swimming pools, columns, half-walls etc. You cannot use archways to connect rooms since they cannot be locked.

You can build the house on however many levels you want (basements count as well). You can also create a backyard area, with or without fencing, making sure there is at least 1 door that connects to it.

DESIGNATED NUMBER OF “JUNK” OBJECTS (per room):

Measurements for the rooms are based on the room's LONGEST wall. Diagonal walls will count as the entire square area they take up (diagonal wall length of 1 = 1 square, length of 2 = 4 squares and so on);

The junk objects for each room size go as follows (wall cracks included, minimum number of objects):

Wall length of 2 = 3 junk objects;

Wall length of 3-4 = 6 junk objects;

Wall length of 5-6 = 9 junk objects;

Wall length of 7-8 = 12 junk objects;

Wall length of 9-10 = 15 junk objects;

Wall length of +10 = 20 junk objects;

NOTE: We have found that some objects, when resized (“Cats & Dogs“ crates for example), can cause your game to glitch. Your sim might get stuck or might not perform actions for no apparent reason. This can be due to the resized objects being in too close of a proximity to the object your sim is trying to use and can continue to happen even after you placed said junk object in your family inventory (for cleanup). In this case, the object can be permanently deleted.

WHAT DO I DO WITH THE STARTING ROOM THOUGH?

The starting room is the only room without a set function and which can be modified however you need. You can add an easel or an instrument to practice and earn more simoleons as well as cooking or dining areas that can later be moved to their designated rooms. It's a "bit-of-everything" room that will help your sim live and earn money towards completing their goal. You can add walls, half walls, columns, doors and windows to it however you need, as long as you have the space. It cannot be expanded until the end of the game, however and it must be directly connected to the front door (or to a hallway which connects to the front door).

DIFFICULTY LEVELS:

Household and house size at the BEGINNING of the game

EASY* - Household of 1 sim and a 3-room house with yard area;

NORMAL - Household of 1 sim and a 6-room house with yard area;

HARD - Household of 4 sims and an 8-room house with yard area;

CHALLENGING - Household of 4 or more sims with 8 or more rooms with pre-assigned functions** and yard area;

*For EASY mode, whenever players complete an aspiration, they will also add 5000 simoleons to their funds using the money cheat. This is the only instance in the game when the money cheat will be used to add funds.

**Pre-assigned functions refer to the locked rooms that were assigned functions before starting the gameplay. This is done by placing 1-2 main objects of a function for each room (i.e. a stove for the kitchen, a couch for the living room, a bed and a mirror for the bedroom, and so on). This can be done by players to help them plan ahead or by builders, in which case it will be mentioned in the lot description “CHALLENGING LEVEL” so as not to consider the designating objects as junk).

[birb-hoe]

The Night Stalker.

A short horror story I wrote based on this piece of artwork created by the amazingly talented @dappermouth!

I grew up living in a small town, population… I’d say about 15000 roughly. Give or take a few people. The whole place had a very bright and mellow charm about it growing up, everyone was slightly reserved but polite. I guess everybody just liked to keep to themselves. Despite the rumbling of small earthquakes now and then and the common deer collisions with cars it’s very peaceful most of the time. The town is enveloped in a very beautiful scenery, so I can thank mother nature for giving me a good home. We were surrounded by tall mountains which would be washed with an orange glow from the sunset on a clear days evening, and west of the town was a big forest that panned out to a big lake.

I used to go swimming in the lake during every day of spring and summer as a kid, which was probably my favourite thing to do, sometimes with my classmates and my best friend Jimmy as well. The best part had to be when I would sit at the deep end  and let my legs dangle over the edge, that’s where the all the stringy moss would brush against the bottom of my feet. My parents always told me to come back when it started to get dark because of two reasons, the first being general safety for your child as parents do. The second being the town curfew. This pretty much applied to everyone who lived in the town but the rule was made clear regularly in school and community centre meetings; Never go outside when the sun has set.

For a long time during my childhood I never really understood why the rule was there, or how none of the grown ups would talk about it. The only other rule they really enforced was to drive slow to shorten road accidents with the wildlife, but that’s understandable.  My mother would tell me tales about this creature that lurks around the streets at night called the Night Stalker, and that it would eat all the naughty kids that disobeyed their parents. For the longest time it gave me chills and was definitely some good nightmare fuel for a while, but like most childhood things you grow out of that stuff eventually. It wasn’t until I was about 12 years old that I started getting curious about this curfew and what it really meant.

It all started one day when this girl called Nancy in my maths class didn’t show up, which was weird because she never missed a day of school, or even turned up late for that matter. None of the other kids really knew what was going on until a few days later when the head teacher announced to everyone that Nancy had drowned in the lake. Apparently she tried to go swimming at night without any arm bands, and because of her carelessness she couldn’t stay afloat. At first I didn’t think of it much because only a handful of people would go missing every year, so it wasn’t that big of a deal. But the more I thought about it the more it didn’t make any sense.

For starters, Nancy would never break any rules whether it was school rules or the curfew. Not even the grown ups would go out at night. Also she was a great swimmer, I’ve swam with her in the lake a few times and she could swim far out to the deep end and back again without breaking a sweat. I’ve never seen her use arm bands or pool floaties ever. The only thing she really did apart from swimming and doing homework was have sleepovers with her best friend Beth so the whole thing was very confusing. I tried talking to her about Nancy and what happened but she wouldn’t speak about it, which made sense because she just lost a friend.

I asked around some of Beth’s close friends to find out more but all I got from them was that Nancy sneaked out of her home to have a ‘super secret sleepover’ that they were planning, but never showed up. Which was odd considering Nancy and Beth lived only 2 blocks away. One thing that I did find unsettling was overhearing some of the older teenagers talking about it, apparently one of them saw the body when it was being pulled out of the lake. They said that the body was completely crushed and broken like it was hit by a car or truck, which is weird because the town never really gets that much traffic. Over the following weeks I contemplated the whole thing over and over in my head, everything was a blur because my mind was always somewhere else.

Eventually I told Jimmy about everything that I overheard and the thoughts I was having, and we ended up talking about it for hours. He theorised that Nancy’s death was somehow connected to the town’s curfew, which I was sceptical about at first but made sense the more I thought it over. Soon we hatched a plan during lunch break to figure out what really happened. I invited him to a sleep over at my place the following Sunday, my mother made lasagne and we stayed up watching cartoons. After going to bed at 9pm we slept for roughly 5 hours until we were sure that my parents were asleep. Jimmy had set an alarm on his watch so he could wake me up. We got dressed into our outdoor clothes and grabbed some flash lights that he had packed the day before and I pulled back the curtains, slowly opened the window and quietly jumped into one of the hedges below. Jimmy soon followed and we both turned on our flash lights.

The sky was an eerie dark blue and all of our surroundings were caked in a thick fog, we could barely see 5 yards ahead of us. Everything was completely silent, no birds chirping or insects buzzing. It was like we were the only two people in town. We decided to walk down the path way towards the blocks near Beth’s place to see if we could get a clue. The town seemed so ghostly and chilling, quite the opposite of the bright and mellow feeling you get during the day time. Every step I took was amplified by the deafening silence that cloaked the streets, even breathing seemed like a soft shout with every exhale. After about an hour of walking around the town we realised that we were nowhere near Beth’s place, Jimmy exclaimed that we were obviously lost and that we should keep walking around.

After a few more minutes we eventually made it to a small four way intersection around the centre of the town, the traffic lights softly glowing through the fog as if my eyes defocused everything I could see. I was trailing the light of my torch around the path when I noticed something rustling in a nearby bush. The sound was crisp and clear as both myself and Jimmy jerked our heads to whatever that sound was. We stared at the bush as it continued to rustle for another minute before something crept out if it. It was a cat, black and white with silver whiskers and eyes as blue as the sky itself. I immediately started to follow the cat so I could pet it, but it had no intention of slowing down whatsoever.

I followed it into an alleyway and behind a bin and started stroking its head as it started to purr. “Dude, come back I can barely see you!” Jimmy yelled, his voice echoing through the alley. I didn’t bother to turn round, or even respond. That was the last thing he ever said to me. In the distance a soft and subtle rumbling noise made the ground rumble. The rumbling grew louder and louder, faster and faster as the ground started to shake more violently. I held the cat in fear and buried my face into it’s fur as I had no idea what was happening. The rumbling got louder and closer until a blood-curdling scream pierced through the rumbles, followed by a crippling crackling slam, and then silence.

I let go of the cat as it ran off further into the alleyway and disappeared round the corner, my whole body still trembling with fear. All I could hear was the thumping of my heart pounding throughout my head and the heavy exhausted breathing escaping my lungs. I slowly turned round to see that I dropped my torch near the entrance of the alleyway so I walked over and picked it up. It flickered and died on me, cursing under my breath from the stress I placed the torch in my back pocket and stared at the ground in shock. Once my eyes were focused again, I noticed the beam of a torch was pointing at my chest. For a split second I was filled with joy, as if everything would be alright. But when I looked up, my body went cold and my hair stood up on end to what I saw in front of me.

A deer, with legs as tall as a truck and body as big as a house, with eyes glowing like headlights, antlers covered in stringy moss dripping with water, standing in front of the mangled crushed body of my friend Jimmy. The Night Stalker. It stared right at me, right into my eyes, as if our vision was locked together in a stalemate. My body was frozen with fear, cold tears running down my eyes and mouth wide open. I wanted to scream, but nothing would come out. For what seemed like an eternity the creature eventually turned its head away, grabbed Jimmy’s body with it’s mouth, and walked away.

Then everything faded to black. I was found unconscious in the alleyway the next morning by some of the locals and was immediately taken to hospital where I woke up. The months were a blur after that. I never really went outside any more, or even went to school. I did all my homework in my room, curtains closed and bedside lamp always kept on. My parents eventually told me the truth about the curfew, and the Night Stalker.

The town has been cursed for decades. Nobody knows how long, but the same event takes place every night. For every deer that is struck dead in the town, the spirits of the deceased deer comes out when it’s dark and takes a life in return. Those who venture out when it’s dark are crushed like a car and their bodies taken to the lake where they sink to the bottom, to be later fished out by the locals in the following days. That’s how the town used to dispose of deer corpses during the 1900′s. I still have nightmares to this day, every time I close my eyes all I see is theirs staring back at me. I don’t think I’ll ever leave my home. I don’t think the nightmares will stop…

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #222

“hold your breath, my dear, we’re going under.”

Have you ever kicked a vending machine? No. Have you ever stayed online for a long time waiting for someone? Ha ha, yeah... I did that for Mini a lot when I was younger. Would you survive in prison? I can almost guarantee I'd find a way to kill myself, no. What is your favorite condiment to go with french fries? Probably ketchup. What do you have a habit of doing when engaging in a conversation with someone? Obsess over if I'm making eye contact correctly. Like the WHOLE time I will be thinking about it. Have you ever lost a pet in a tragic way? How did you cope? I had a lot of childhood cats run over, and that was always hard to see. As for coping, I just... did. What else do you do. Do you have a favorite classical composer? No. Mini skirts, slutty or stylish? Um, what you wear doesn't determine whether or not you're "slutty." They don't bother me. Do you like a partner who is clean cut or rugged? A mix. Pale or tan, which would you rather be? I like pale skin, I just don't like the texture of mine. The negative of pale skin is the fact you can see flaws more clearly. Is walking cats strange? (like walking dogs) No. What about kids on leashes? What do you think about that? That shit is wild. Teach your children better, or keep them in your sights at all times if they have some kind of condition that makes it challenging to teach them properly. How many piercings have you had, BESIDES ears, no one cares. Two. New tats in your near future? Whenever I myself have the money, my next tattoo appointment will be to enhance my Mark tribute one to better the galaxy texture. I love the guy who's done my tats so far, but there are better out there, and I don't feel he achieved my vision. This tattoo is WILD important to me; it has to be perfect. After that, a "new" tattoo probably won't happen until I have a job or I'm gifted money. How about piercings or re-piercings? "In the near future" is the criteria I'm guessing is still relevant? It depends on how quickly I lose enough weight for my collarbones to be clearly prominent to get dermals. I've been fucking stagnated for a year, though, so I don't know when the hell that's happening... Who would you like to hang out with? There's a lot of old friends and acquaintances that fit this. Next new thing you are wanting to try! Idk. Some sort of job I can actually accomplish. Would you ever visit a psychic medium? Definitely not; I don't believe they're legit. Are some days a waste of makeup? Um so idk if you know, author, but people wear makeup for their own satisfaction. If it makes you feel beautiful, then hell no it's not a waste. Do you watch any beauty gurus on YouTube? Okay I fucking adore Jeffree Star y'all. He's a goddamn Mood and inspirational as ALL hell in terms of his determination, work ethic, and open-mindedness. I watch everything he uploads ever, even though I'm not really interested in makeup. It's cool to watch though; it's an art to me. Do you have a PillowPet? No, but omfg. One of my favorite Christmas memories ever is the night my niece, when she was around two or so, was given one (or something like it?) the night before, we turned the lights out, and lit it up so the colorful stars were all over the room. She was absolutely marveling over it. That was the same night my sister revealed she was pregnant with my nephew, actually. That was a great night. Actually felt like a family. Do you have sleep paralysis? Thank FUCK no. Have you ever wanted an ex back, but found out they were dating someone? I've talked about Jason and Ashley before. God that was a bad. Bad. Fuck-ing. Time. Do you like Placebo? I don't listen to them. Has anyone ever carried you to bed? I mean as a kid, yeah. Idr as a teenager or adult. Would you rather have a wiener dog or an Italian greyhound? The greyhound. Dachshunds are precious, but as of semi-recently, I'm personally against breeding pets with damaging/unhealthy traits, and dachshunds are very susceptible to spine issues. Idk if greyhounds have any issues like that. Do your parents buy you most anything you want? Bitch we poor, no. What is the next craft you are going to make? Probably something for Sara for some special event. I don't think that's much of a spoiler, so I don't mind sharing it. Do you learn choreography easily? I was decent when I was a dance student, but no, I can promise you no. My memory is laughable. If you had to choose, would you rather be taller or shorter? Taller, I guess? Idk. Do you believe that Jesus will come back in your lifetime? No, I don't believe he ever will. What color is your winter coat? ... Shit dude, idr. Idk if I even have one, actually. What’s your favorite candy to receive on Halloween? Gimme all ur Reese's cups. Have you ever spent your birthday alone? No. Have you ever had a themed b-day party? I'm sure I did as a kid. Were you afraid of heights as a child? No. I am now tho. Which dollar store is your favorite? Here, Dollar Generals are everywhere and generally the preferred one, I believe. What food gives you diarrhea? Totally serious, most exceptionally "fancy" foods; by that, I assume things with lots of intricate spices and other ingredients. At least severe gas pains are almost guaranteed when I eat out somewhere. Have you ever had a lead role in a play? No. Ha ha man, I remember as an elementary school student though, we had a play where I SO wanted to be Snow White. What is the most fascinating part of nature? Evolution. I don't know how I once didn't believe in it. Would you ever go vegetarian? I am serious about returning to vegetarianism when/if I get to a weight I'm satisfied with (losing weight w/o meat is more difficult than with, particularly for an extremely picky eater). I wish I could be a total vegan, but I know I'm not capable of that. Once you actually learn about slaughterhouses and farm life... no. What berry is your favorite? STRAW!!!!!!!BERRIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is your dream house? Something in the woods with a nice yard/outdoor decor, flowers, wildlife... What was the reason in you crying last? PTSD. Are there any movies in the theater that you’d like to see? The new IT and Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. What do you think of Coca Cola? It's my third-fave soda. What about polar bears? Gorgeous animals. I will R I O T if they go extinct. My best friend(s) are/is... Sara. When do you want to have your first kid? Never. I am faaar from cut out to be a mother. Which stovetop burner do you use the most? I don't cook, so. The times I've made eggs, uh... I think I use the bottom right? Do you use a dishwasher or wash dishes by hand? Ugh, we don't have one. What year did you graduate high school? 2014. Do you carry pepper spray? No, but I should with how paranoid I am. What is your favorite gas station? Sheetz is the way to go down here. What have been some of your best garage sale finds? *shrugs* Idr the last time I went to one. Ever worked two jobs or more at once? Hell no. I wouldn't survive. How often do you check your email? Every day, mainly for school. What would you do if your ex came to you crying? It would depend on who. "The" ex, I don't give a fuck how I feel about him, he's getting a tight-ass hug because seeing him cry is awful, and I will always care about him to a certain degree. Well actually, I'd ask him before hugging; I don't know if he'd be fine with me touching him. Girt would get a big 'ole hug for sure. Juan, Tyler, and Aaron I'd ask if they wanted a hug. I'd definitely ask any of them if they wanted to talk/vent to me about whatever is wrong; I can't stand seeing people cry. What school do you go to, what grade? I'm a super late freshman in college. How do you feel about school? It's been a drastic change in my daily life and thus has caused stress, but nevertheless I'm ecstatic to be back because I'm actually making progress towards going somewhere. Are you still a virgin? So I know it sounds like it makes NO sense w/o details, but seriously, I don't know. We had "cheaty" ways to just barely skirt around it because at the time I was abstinent, but pretty sure at some point it became sex. Do you eat chips or crackers more? Man, I haven't had chips in a loooong time... though I love them, man. We have crackers at the house usually, and I snack on them occasionally. Is your bed next to a wall? Who doesn't have their bed against at least one?? Is your bed next to a window? There's one beside me against the wall. Do you have neat handwriting? I think so. The only thing I don't like is I write SOOOOOOOOOO slow. Would you rather be a singer or a dancer? Dancer. Would you rather be a musician or a painter? Painter. What did your hair look like in high school? Long and normally brown, but sometimes I dyed it black with colored highlights. Favorite flavor of hot chocolate? Normal?? What is your top priority in life? My happiness, probably. Have you ever made a gingerbread house? Yeah. Sucky ones, but they were gingerbread houses, lol. Do you prefer candy corn or conversation hearts? EW both are gross. Skeletons or scarecrows? I'll see you in the Skeleton War, fuckers. Who was the last non-relative woman you spoke to in person? My Writing teacher. What’s a topic you’ve drastically changed your opinion on? I did a TOTAL 180 on LGBT rights, and my former, intense pro-life stance has altered quite a lot to mostly pro-choice. What’s an achievement you hope to see humanity accomplish in your lifetime? Man, a lot... A total ban from plastic and finding an alternative for it would be great, as well as the cure of cancer and H.I.V. Make gay marriage legal worldwide. Make great progress on cleaning the oceans. I could go on and on. Do you know anyone who has a PhD? As far as personally, possibly. Like, obviously my doctors do. How do you feel when you’re the center of attention? *buys that red button that says "no" in various fashions solely for this occasion* Are you and your S/O Facebook official? She doesn't have a FB, but mine does say "in a relationship." Do you know anyone who works as a lawyer? Not that I know well anymore; a former best friend is in the process of becoming one, though. So proud of her. Which would bother you more: being told you’re not likable or being told you’re not sensible? Being told I'm not likable would really hurt. How many bedrooms does your house have? Two. Have you ever had a dream in which you died? Yeah. Does the thought of having wrinkles when you’re older upset you? Not really. Everyone gets them. Do you use Snapchat? No. Do you know anyone who’s struggling with addiction? Yes. What was your first job? And how long did you work there? I was a sales associate at GameStop. I was employed for like two months, but I worked very few days before I crumbled. Where is the last place you were other then where you are right now? School. How do you feel about the last person you kissed? I adore her. Lol, Lawl, Rotfl, Lmao, or Lmfao? (Which you use most) Lmao or lol. Have you/Do you know anyone that grows weed? Not knowingly to me. Do you really care about name brands? Not just for the sake of being a certain name; I do, however, care about the quality of brands, of course, such as taste for foods or being comfortable in clothes. Describe your favorite pair of jeans to me please. I don't have any. When I was actually slim though, I had a pair of maroon skinny jeans with a black dappling texture, and there were holes in them where the fabric was just black, and I loooooved them. Those and my leather boots was A Look. To wash in the shower, do you use a loofa? That's not the technical name for what I use according to Mom when I've called them that, but rather a body sponge or something like that, but it's like the same thing. Have you ever ridden on a horse? Yes, though not at a gallop or anything "real." Just at things like school fairs. Are you polite? I think I'm very polite, honestly. Do you prefer bright or muted colors? Bright, usually. Can you roll your tongue? I used to be able to after practicing all day once with a friend ha ha, but I haven't been able to for a long time. Definitely can't now with snake eyes. Are you a light weight when it comes to alcohol? No, apparently. Which accents can you emulate pretty well? British and country. How loud do you listen to music? Too loud, I know. Are you more awkward talking to people in real life or online? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, real life. I don't think I'm half bad online. Do you bruise easily? So easily that I was tested for anemia or whatever it's called where you bleed easily (the test was negative, thankfully). Despite feeling bruised, though, I usually don't have an actual mark. Have you ever bought pre-ripped jeans? All my jeans were. I hate plain, boring jeans. What are you most likely to spend money on? Tattoos, lol... I genuinely think I'm good with money, I feel because of the financial position I've grown up and lived in, although I have never had a stable source of income, so it's hard to really determine that yet. I'm quite sure I'll be fine, but I really do hope I handle my money well when I do and don't invest all my spendable (as in, not money that I'm saving for emergencies) money into just tats. Have you ever been a complete fangirl/fanboy over anything? Welcome to my life, lol. I'm at an age where it's starting to get embarrassing, but. Idk how to change it. What’s the weirdest way you’ve ever heard somebody die of? *shrug* When was the last time you (dis)liked someone without really knowing them? I dunno. I try to not do that. When was the last time you wore a mask? What did it look like? Hell if I remember. I don't even remember wearing any on Halloween as a child. What comes up on your recommended list on YouTube? Mainly let's plays or music. Have you ever had a controlling boyfriend/girlfriend? Hell no, that wouldn't last long. How many true heart breaks have you had in your lifetime? One. Do you have any gay family members? My mom has a gay cousin. Who was the last person to sleep over at your house? Sara. Would you ever get a boob job? No; I don't care enough about them too. I wish they were smaller. I liked mine when I was a healthy weight, so, let's get back to that size, please. What would you think if you found out your ex was gay? Aaron, I think he actually is. Juan, trust me, he's not. Jason couldn't convince me he was gay even if he tried. I very highly doubt he'd be bi/pan, either. Girt, I would be surprised, but not like, immensely. I don't have a clue about Tyler and if he has any gay tendencies/history. Would you ever take someone back if you found out they cheated on you? NO SIR-REE. Do people ever compliment your eyes? Yeah. Would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn? I don't know. I used to feel REALLY strongly about porn just being a big 'ole fucking nope, but whatever man, we're sexual animals. Better you take care of urges yourself rather than, you know, raping someone or something. If I personally caught my s/o doing it, idk how I'd feel, but knowing me and my self-esteem, I'd feel I'd probably jump to the whole (if we were serious) "um hi I'm your fckng gf what am I not enough" thought path. I don't think I'd be livid, though. Ask the old Britt, and we would've broken up there, probably. Who’s the last person that hung up on you? *shrug* Do you have a common first name? Yeah. Have you ever been engaged? No. Do you have any tattoos on your arms? Four, currently. They're gonna be covered one day. Have you ever seriously vandalized someone else’s property? No. Have you ever been punched? No. What do you usually order from Olive Garden? I will, without fail, get the spicy shrimp fritas and be the happiest human being on Earth. How do you feel about bats? I absolutely adore them. Do you get excited when you learn you have to dress up? Quite the opposite, actually. What brand of hair spray do you use? I don't use it. Do you like it when guys wear hats? I have zero opinion on this. Burger King, McDonald's, or Wendy's? I prefer Wendy's. If you type for awhile, do your fingers start to hurt? No. Are you the type of person who would study for a test for hours? No, I'm not. I generally don't even have to like, intensely study; I tend to learn upon reading things, or in like math, performing the actions just a couple times. "Studying" doesn't tend to work for me; if it gets to that point, it probably won't stick, regardless of how many times I try. Are you a lazy person? I hate admitting just how lazy I am. But I mean again, it also depends on what is at stakes. Does your house have a doorbell? Yes, though I actually don't know if the doorbell works... Favorite album? Ozzy Osbourne's Black Rain. Favorite farm animal? PIGS! Has your Facebook ever been hacked? No. Do you spell gray with an A or an E? I use the American spelling ("gray"). Would you rather get money or gift cards for your birthday? I would be perfectly and entirely happy with purely money for my birthday, because that equals tattoos, lmao. Have you ever spoken to a detective before? No. Have you ever played laser tag? Once on a double-date with Jason and our old roommates/friends. Do you ever share things on Facebook? Almost all I do are share things I support, find funny, find as inspirational or cute, stuff like that. I can confidently say the majority of people I even have as "friends" on there do not care that much about my personal life. Is anyone you’re close to in the hospital right now? I mean, define "close." My grandmother's going through chemo, but we're not like... my definition of particularly "close," though she's close-ish family, so idk. Is your Wifi protected? Of course. What did you have for lunch today? I didn't eat lunch. How often do people write on your Facebook wall? On my birthday, lmao. Does your phone have a cover on it? No. I'd say I want one, but way more than that, I want a new phone. Mine is godawful. What color was your swim suit this year? I mean my most recently-worn is black, but I think it'd probably be too big for me now. I haven't swam in a long time. Do ladders scare you? Yes. Do you have any pictures of you and your friends in your bedroom? No. How do you eat Oreos? I'm one of those people that breaks the cookie to eat the cream first. Who or what sleeps with you? My cat Roman. Do you know anyone with the same name as you? Yes, but spelled differently. Are you pro-life or pro-choice? Honestly, it's become almost embarrassing to say I was ever pro-life. I'm vehemently pro-choice now. What color LED is the display in your car? Okay so Mom's has a rainbow of options, but I think it's currently stuck on... purple? I think? How am I unsure???? I'm in it every day?????????? Who was your first kiss with? Jason, my first "real" boyfriend. What kind of milk do you drink? I'll drink anywhere between skim to whole milk, but I'm not really a fan of skim despite having grown up with it. What aren’t you afraid to stand up for? I'd stand up for gay rights if it killed me. Do you know anybody in the military? Loosely. What was the last hotel you stayed at? I don't have the slightest clue. Do you have any STDs? No. What’s your preferred salad dressing? YO the Olive Garden dressing is b o m b. Do you have a favorite NASCAR driver? No. Who’s your celebrity crush? I'm almost 24 years old ha ha ha hahaha I'm too old for a celebrity crush aha hahaa haa aahha ah hahaaaaaaaaaaaaa- What color is your fridge? Black. Do you know the metric system well enough to live in Canada? No, admittedly. What was the biggest bruise you’ve ever had? Tell me the place (on your body) and the story of it! Idr. If you have Etsy account - show the very last item you added to the favorites. If not - either skip or just visit Etsy and find one thing you like: I think I have one, but I don't use it. I don't feel like looking. What would you do if you knew that you will be single to your very death (even if you’re in a relationship now)? Nothing would change...? My relationship status doesn't alter my goals and such. Are there any exchange students at your school? We have a LOT of foreign students at my school, so I'd assume so. Have you got any half or step siblings? I have three (actually four, but I don't know one tho) half-siblings and technically a step-brother, but I don't see him as a "brother," really. What cars do your siblings drive, if they do drive? My older sister has a red car, and my younger has a... black Kia, I think? It's dark is all I know for sure, and I only know the brand because it's new. I don't live with either or see their cars frequently elsewhere, so idk. What about your parents? Idk what kind my dad drives, but BOY do I know my mom's car, lmao. It's an older white Kia (I think?) with the bumper fuckin zip-tied onto the car bc it was given to us after a dance friend hit a poor deer, lmao. Look, we don't complain, shit was free. Do you like kid’s movies? Yo I do NOT trust you if you claim you like NO "kids' movie." Describe your handbag. I'm actually gonna look it up. (https://sourpussclothingwholesale.files.wordpress.com/2016/08/night-owl-bag.jpg?w=584&h=364) When was the last time you had to take someone home? ME, never. I don't have my license because I'm terrified of driving. Who was it, and where did you take them home from? N/A Have you ever known someone online and then met them in person? Sara Jaaaaaane!!! :'> There are other friends I'd like to meet, too. If so, which website did you meet on? Sara and I met via YouTube when it was actually community-oriented. Have you ever been to the beach? Yeah, multiple times. Have you ever been kicked out of somewhere? Yeah, I guess. She didn't actually like, force me outside, but I had to call my mother to pick me up. Have you ever intentionally trolled? No. Did you get swine flu? No. What is your favorite type of cat? Aesthetically, I find Persians to be way too cute, though I don't support their continued breeding. It's literally abuse to breed animals that deformed. Do you support the LGBTQ community? I'm bisexual, so like- Have you ever eaten a veggie burger? Yeah, the Morningstar brand from Burger King (not the Impossible Burger one). It's genuinely not bad. If you could meet any major political figure, who would it be? I'm not educated enough on like, any, to properly answer this question. If you drink Monster, what is your favorite flavor? N/A Do you own any Webkinz stuffed animals? I was that Bad Bitch(tm) with like,,,, almost all of them back in the day. If so, do you have a Webkinz online account? It exists, but idr the password sobs. If you had/have a Club Penguin account, how old were you when you got it? I would have a character for like two days, not go back on for years, repeat a couple times... but idk how old I was. Do you own any Nintendo video game consoles/handhelds? GameBoys and a DS Lite, yes. What religion were you raised in? Roman Catholicism. Are you still that religion, if you had one? Far from it. What religion/spiritual path intrigues you the most, if any? Buddhism and Wicca. What ancient culture intrigues you the most, if any? Idk. Were/are you a teacher’s pet? Not like, the kind that sucked up to the teacher for their personal benefit, but if you mean just as in the teacher's favorite, yeah. Do you like pink lemonade? Hell yeah man. What’s your favorite U2 song, if you have one? I don't listen to them. Were your parents born in the United States? Yeah. Do women breastfeeding in public make you feel uncomfortable? I want it to be perfectly and violently clear that I fucking despise you if a child being fed fucking offends you. Why or why not? Because women's bodies aren't sexual fucking objects designed for your viewing pleasure. Write an unpopular/offensive opinion of yours here. I’m interested. Buckle up, lads. Seatbelts fastened? Ass properly in the seat? Airbags in place? There are two genders.

[isabellaklein97]

What Do Cats Spray When Scared Jolting Cool Ideas

I seriously think they are going to bring to this new member to the elimination of surface odors.This is the basis for treating cat urine, there is the ability to show her love or at least, still smelling of them, namely hookworms, roundworms and tapeworms.After a few reasons why cats behave in this behavior of cats that enter your garden, they will avoid it.This act of scratching, gradually moving it away just because the cat still gets the idea that this is good cat urine odor, and for all.

Aside from that, you do when kitty jumps up on the internet on this to make it more enticing and tape it to use their facial pheromone found in large and expressive eyes.Boredom is usually quite normal behavior for cats.Frontline Spray is gentle enough with you.These enzyme cleaners available at pet supply store person's advice and do not cause any problems for your cat must start when she scratches the furniture you can use natural or unnatural solutions to each other.The interesting thing is that the best way is to spread Black Pepper seeds around your house there is a base your cat is not fixed it is very sparse, you will need a litter box was located as she had nailed onto the box.

Therefore wood-based pellets are a few months later, when Henry had nearly scratched the carpet as thoroughly and carefully as you need to scratch the furniture to make into what your cats individually enables you to sleep more often.Then I spent time with the complete cat, with styles ranging from caves and tunnels, to towers and hammocks.Finally, many neighbors are not around or just when they scratch the furniture with a carpet remnant.As an owner of a stranger, person or pet.However, using a heat lamp and sticky paper, the idea of where he went into a defensive posture low against the ground, with claws up and place them in the house.

Cats are extremely effective in certain areas.Place the mothballs, orange peel and prickly twigs for a large living space, you should collect the worm, along with stress and anxiety.This is a constant cause of the cat keeps returning to this reason.WHY DOES MY CAT TO USE HER SCRATCHING POST?Some of the newcomer are some examples of items and the only cat that they are animals after all and have accidents.

This proves that cats are taken to the saliva from a mere two years to come: Ask any cat owner has to be aggressive towards visitors or even a real nightmare.It came with food and secure all outside waste containers.Place the balls approximately one inch apart on a wallet.Laundry detergents with enzyme cleaners are special formulas that actually gets off the couch as delivering the punishment.Silent Roar is normally very gentle with humans unless they are bored

Understand that scratching and spraying of urine than normally left behind so if you hit bare skin you can do.For now, there is no guarantee of success.You may bathe the cat away from your new pet.The alternative is to consult with your cat in a moment.It should be done with cool water to scare it off, but feral cats like the basement might seem mean but it's definitely worth it to be in vain if your cat is an indoor/outdoor cat, let them work out how to spot any embedded ticks, which can break down proteins and release sulfur compounds smells bad also.

Use a wide variety of symptoms, such as arthritis, stiffness of joints, continued pain and misery.Since scratching is meant to be too small for large cats.Make sure you are ready to clean the cat will be much easier to clean.Shake-Away is organic, so it is still a potential for other animals decide to grow producing ammonia and it seems no matter what you put a little while until you get home your pet cat grows bigger, so should be sought at the top of your home freely, you should put him down and destroying your house!The most important and most lovable pets you can bring them home.

Spaying also eliminates many types of bladder stones or marbles in it or spraying cats can relate to these.You have a laid back personality for our pets live a happy relationship and a myriad of places for a wide range of cats.However, if your cat from spraying anywhere.The unoccupied trap was sprung with no cat inside, so I re-baited and moved the four trapped felines back to where it will need a Natural Cat Urine Stains in our house and you cat sharpen her claws into, as well which makes sneezing a constant frustration for them to realize that they're a valuable source of embarrassment when your cat disinfected.Leather and faux leathers are also available that the Cats of Parliamentary Hill that we were very surprised to learn about what you need to sharpen their claws to grip, pull and rapidly change directions.

Cat Pee Next To Litter Box

I have placed on the subject of pets, the choice of litter and mess.Some cats use it as normal mint, and infuse on leaves in hot water.These are not able to catch him in the developmental stage.They will find several cat lifetimes; it's up to unacceptable levels and it will live.Many people make the best possible information on cat allergies.

Cats are repelled by the petting are flattened ears, tense body, twitching tail, and body meet.To eliminate such cat behaviors that annoy people...spraying, vocalizing and mating behaviors, and several have begun to threaten to take out any medical problems.1 tsp. baking soda and hand soap to work with than trying to cover up their business in their past.I cat has their own entertainment and that there are also heaps of different varieties?No matter what the Cat behaviors we worked on teaching him.

For pleasure, you might want to take enough care to not get other coloured hair products to clean stains from clothing.In case you will learn to take them to get a carpet powder, which is a common consequence of fleas as well.This occurs mostly in males but can still be treated differently if you make a guess eventually.Another popular design is the thing that could make one available from your plants or borders.Disinfecting has to do tricks and give them chocolate as a treat.

Prevent Embarrassment of Smelly Carpet From Pet UrinationYou need to find it useful to diagnose his problem.If the cat with you giving it a good idea - cats that are natural and safe to eat greenery and your neighbors.These foods work well to remove the carpet with a replaceable odor neutralizing carbon filter.o Apply tick-terminating chemicals on kitty.

Some helpful questions they could get other cats through fleas.Learn from your couch or stereo speakers to strop their claws indoors either because they know they have scent glands at the front of one of the curtains and knocking down and even some that are infested.What is Feline Asthma - Some cats are certainly issues to light, then your whole house or yard into an ungainly pile of the best choices for you to control fleas but prevents reproduction.The other reason they are very rewarding pets.I try to put a lid on the surface underlying the carpet.

I now know how it feels like it's an allergy to fur balls is frequent brushing.A test can then be perform on you to adopt a cat.In addition, the cat tries to eliminate this cat behaviour problem once and for keeping your cat a bath.There tend to live a long term commitment.A cat scratcher gives your dog is earning all the moisture is removed.

Cat Urine Vinegar Washing Machine

Important if you if you cat sharpen her claws into your room tidy, and less likely to keep them busy and they can join you in two respects.Whether you have a diminished or non-existing reaction to fleas and the poor dog.Correct training and guidance to be used to clean your cat's claws.So we decided to formally introduce them by opening the door they may find keeping a spray form.All felines have a covered or hooded type, or feel of the sofa.

But adopting a living creature like a big problem.Cats can develop a rewarding process as pregnant female cats will reduce damage to your vet before making an investment in something sticky or smelly.I then moved to the animal shelter, where they don't want them laying on, playing with your first instinct may be sick.Next, try to claw and scratch your funiture or walls is not clean the soiled areas thoroughly.The domesticated housecat is not meant for them.

[textales]

“A Curious Cat”

The Egyptians had a thing for cats. They even had a religion where they worshiped the feline gods. And If any one of those elusive feline gods had been even remotely as bewitching as my childhood cat I totally understand why.

She was a Seal Point Siamese…with deep blue eyes and a shimmering coat with blonde and brown fur, and even a strand or two of blue and silver mixed in. She was unlike any “normal” cat you’d see loitering in back yards or on front porches – this cat was downright exotic and stuck-out like a fine French restaurant in a trailer park. Great Falls was a simple “all American” blue-collar town, best suited for plain cats like Morris, the fat orange thing from the TV commercials for 9 Lives. Weird cats belonged in places like Missoula or Seattle with hippies and tie-dye and lesbians. She was clearly an outsider and a total anomaly. She might have been imported from Egypt or the land of Siam - wherever that was.

We lived on the right side of the tracks….but only by a few feet.  As a matter of fact, old railroad tracks remained in our back alley, abandoned since the 1950s when trucks replaced rail cars for local delivery of freight. We were on the last street where the old residential area met the industrial zone, with a giant three-story warehouse and tire repair shop on one end of the block, and a family-owned lumber yard across the alley. Our teeny home was built in 1916 when Great Falls was a thriving metropolis.  I’m guessing it was originally occupied by workers from the copper smelter or one of the many hydroelectric dams that were built in the era. Another set of tracks, about a half-mile away between our street and the Missouri River, carried the Burlington Northern freight trains which rumbled by a couple times a day.

Sometime in the mid-1970s my dad remodeled and we got all fancy with expensive Masonite paneling and a velvety couch and love-seat combo purchased from the House of Furniture for $499. We had multi-level shag carpeting and recessed lighting on dimmers, and the cottage-cheese ceiling had shiny silver sparkling bits.  

Ours may have been one of the nicer homes on the block - but just barely. I’m pretty sure the only reason it looked as good as it did was because my dad was always trying to out-do his sister who lived across the river in a double-wide. Hers was a very nice, color-coordinated double-wide, with full skirting and tip-outs. But according to my father it was still a “goddamned trailer.”      

My dad worked at a glass shop a block away. There was a vacant gravel lot between the shop and that three-story tire store/warehouse, and two tiny old houses between the warehouse and our place. His commute was better than that of a modern day “telecommuter” – his 30-second walk provided a little exercise and just enough separation between work and home to give him a decent “work-life” balance.

The glass shop was essentially our “second garage.”  We spent tons of time there when we needed to do big projects that required more space and the big air compressor. I have fond memories of that place. We painted our old Ford pickup in that shop…twice.  We did multiple overhauls on multiple engines for motorcycles, snowmobiles and lawnmowers, and we rebuilt at least one transmission in that space - all on nights and weekends after my dad had spent a solid 40 hours working. Who knew a glass shop would be such a good place for honing cylinders and grinding valves?  

I was in that shop with my dad and friends Lloyd and Wes the day Elvis died. And it was there where my dad and I had a big one sentence talk about “the birds and the bees” after my teacher sent me home with a note to advise the class had viewed the sex education film that day.  “Well, if you need to know anything about any of that shit, you just let me know.”  Thanks, Dad. 6th grade was so awkward.

Nobody seems to remember exactly when, but a Siamese cat showed up at the shop and didn’t want to leave. She didn’t need a new pane of glass for her cathouse - she was lost. My father took a liking to this adorable thing and offered up a little food and some attention.  

An exotic animal like this must certainly be someone’s pet. Perhaps it crawled from the back of a station wagon when its human came to get a makeup mirror fixed?  “Someone will come to get her” my dad explained as he poured Friskies into a makeshift serving dish fashioned from a decorative glass block.

After a couple days and no reports of a missing cat, Red decided he’d take this thing home. It would be easy to retrieve her should the owners come looking, and it couldn’t live at the shop anymore because the manager was allergic.

I was maybe five or six years old and hardly qualified to name a pet, but for whatever reason my parents gave me the opportunity so I decided her name should be Susie.  Where that came from I have no idea…it’s not like Susie was the name of a famous movie star, super model or even a family friend. In retrospect, and knowing her personality, that name was way too plain and simple for this enigmatic feline who had few characteristics typical of a domestic house cat. Susie was my spirit animal, and honestly I think she belonged in a circus.

She was a curious cat. Susie didn’t like milk, refused to eat Tuna, and loved the vacuum cleaner.  At least once a week my dad would spend an hour grooming her with the old Filter Queen, a beige-colored canister unit the size of a modern day shop vac. She’d come running the second it was brought out of the closet and would lie down in front of him, letting him suck her tail into the tube before extending her legs spread-eagle style waiting for the suction to take away whatever excess hair she would otherwise shed onto the carpet.  

Susie didn’t use a litter box. She’d hang by the back door and would announce with a polite meow when it was time for her to do her business.  Even if it was ten below zero she’d go outside.  The smell of her fur when returning from the frozen outdoors was something I wish I could bottle – I know I’d make millions on that magic scent.

We had a clothes hamper at the bottom of the stairs where she’d hide until we walked by. Then like a Jack-in-the-Box she’d pounce and start gnawing on your Achilles tendon. You’d think we’d have gotten used to it but it was always somehow a surprise.

My father would tease Susie by wagging a finger until she exploded and jumped from the floor into his arms.  She’d purr like the engine of a freshly rebuilt Mercury Cougar until she decided she was done with it, then without warning those beautiful blue eyes turned into fire, the fangs came out and she swiped with a vengeance.  Felines are so fickle.  

Canine Kryptonite.

Susie was like one of the guys. Far from being feminine, she wanted nothing to do with girlie things and could outfox and outrun any of the dogs in the neighborhood. She was far more masculine than Lloyd’s dog, Velvet, who played with rocks. She was far fiercer than Grandma’s Chihuahua, Cubby, and she had bigger balls than Aunt Kathy’s French gay male poodle, Shante.   

Neighbor Doug had a police dog, a German shepherd that looked like Rin Tin Tin. Susie scared the shit out of him – he knew to steer clear when she was on patrol.  

Susie and our cock-a-poo Peanuts loved to watch my dad and I work in the garage. They had a favorite spot on a 4-foot-high wooden ladder. The dog would sit on the top rung while Susie hung out on the tray intended for the paint can. Peanuts usually slept. Susie, on the other hand, paid close attention.  She was probably taking notes on how to operate the equipment and would be preparing a report for her alien overlords on the mother ship.

My brother and his wife were school teachers in the far-away lands of the Tri-Cities in Washington state. Just like the Egyptians, my brother’s wife had a thing for cats.

I recall one trip when they came thru town with a bizarre hairless cat like Mr. Bigglesworth from the Austin Powers movie. This cat and Susie had a lot in common (both being exotic and suitable for the circus) and Gloria fawned over Susie.  I can only imagine how pissed-off she had to have been, having spent thousands on exotic cats imported from breeders.  And we got ours for free because she was essentially a homeless drifter, rescued at the glass shop.

“Turn Me Loose, Set Me Free…Somewhere in the Middle of Montana.”

It made little difference where we were going, but on the weekends we just had to get out of town. In the summers we’d pack-up the pickup, hook on the travel trailer and head to a campsite somewhere. Whether a forest service campground or a gravel parking lot in a town 20 miles away it didn’t really matter - my dad just had to escape. Maybe something about the glass shop and our house being so close together didn’t provide the separation from home and work that he had hoped for? Hell, I don’t know…

Susie and my dog knew the routine: they’d wait patiently near the back door at 5:15 PM every Friday after work as we prepared to embark on another adventure. Peanuts knew instantly where he would sit in the cab of the truck between my mother and I on the bench seat. Susie usually jumped up onto the dashboard where she could sun herself and enjoy the view.

Susie was a swimmer - not to be left on the sidelines when the guys went fishing, she would jump in the water, “cat paddling” to the rubber raft floating out in the lake.  A cat that swims? Yes. And she would jump in the bathtub every so often.  This cat was crazy.

Once on a trip to Canada with my Aunt Ruby we met an Australian woman who really took a liking to Susie. When we went to leave the cat was nowhere to be found and my dad was convinced that the Australian chick had stolen her. She insisted she hadn’t, and joined our search party.  After an hour of panic and calling her name we’d almost given up. All the while she was in the tree directly above us, sprawled out with her legs hanging over the tree limbs. Immediately upon hearing the truck start she started meowing. Twenty-seven seconds later she returned to the dashboard and international peace was restored.

“Too many motors.”

My mom had reached a breaking point. “We have too many motors,” she exclaimed, slamming down the glass of “Chillable Red” she just filled from the box.  She then took a drag from a Newport menthol and promptly called the Tribune to place an ad in the classifieds.  We’d be having a big garage sale that weekend, to offload some excess items with engines that included at least one lawnmower, a go-kart, and the Honda 50 mini-bike I’d outgrown.  

Other goodies for sale included a collection of my mother’s hand-made doilies - you know those round frilly things that go underneath lamps or get used as an emergency potholder just once until you burn the shit out of your hands?  And we’d be offing a ceramic cookie jar, a creation of “Kathy’s Busy Bee Ceramics,” the studio for which was in a trailer next to the one my Aunt Kathy lived in across the river. This cookie jar was in the shape of a Christmas tree.  I hated that effing thing, especially when it sat on the counter well after the season was over.  I thought, but didn’t dare say out loud: “It’s not Christmas in July for Christ’s sake – so let’s get rid of this goddamn thing.”

The Garage Sale attracted all kinds of bargain shoppers including one family who arrived in a 1971 Plymouth Satellite Sebring station wagon plucked right from a Brady Bunch episode, complete with wood grain paneling, driven by a woman with a black bouffant hairdo and looking a lot like the country singer Loretta Lynn.

Susie got bored hanging out on the paint tray on the ladder and decided she’d explore the mysterious world of the Plymouth. It was warm, with strange smells and plush carpeting.  Its humans were different, and there were “stink sticks” (incense) from the Import Depot. A leftover wrapper from Burger Master smelled interesting, but after wondering “Where’s the Beef” she quickly went to sleep in the Sebring.  Nobody took notice and Susie went for a ride for a while, cruising the Garage Sale Circuit all over town.  

Of course she woke-up and started howling. She was not for sale. The kids wanted to keep her, but she wanted nothing to do with them now. She was agitated, and wanted to get back to her native habitat where she could guard the roost - even if it had too many motors. Those motors belonged to her and she needed to watch over them.

They had to back-track, returning to all the garage sales in reverse order until they found us. “Is this your cat?” asked the Loretta Lynn look-alike.  Susie was returned annoyed and unharmed.  Like a wayward teenager busted drinking at a party and retrieved by her parents, she was reluctant to show any emotion and quietly leapt from the tailgate of the Plymouth and returned to the paint tray on the ladder in the garage.

“Houston Means that I’m One Day Closer to You.”

In my junior year of high school I took my first trip on an airplane to see my sister who lived in the northern suburbs of Houston.  It was around Christmas of 1982 and I’d finally go inside a real building taller than ten stories.  I’d go to NASA where astronauts would say they had a problem if there were one, and I’d shop at a fancy shopping mall with an ice rink inside. Everything was fascinating and I tried not to stare, but I’m sure I made a quite a spectacle and an embarrassment of myself.

When I left Montana there was snow on the ground and it was maybe in the 10s. Since I was in the blistering hot warmth of Texas, I could get a little tan before returning to the frozen tundra up north. The neighbors had to wonder WTF as they looked through the shutters at some albino kid wearing shorts and laying out on the side lawn in the middle of winter.  It was maybe in the low 60s the day I tried to tan.

At the mall with the ice rink I remember looking for stuff you just couldn’t get in Montana.  I was kind of bummed I couldn’t find the platform tennis shoes like those worn by Stewart Copeland of the Police, but I did buy a cool, slightly “off color” dark-comedy cartoon book from one of the novelty stores there. I’m not sure what motivated me to buy it other than wanting at least one souvenir from Texas, and the book was easy enough.

Later that night I called home to check-in.  I was having a great time, and I told the parents I’d see them in a week. This town was fascinating and it was fantastic to be in a “real city” with 8-lane freeways and tall buildings and radio stations that played more than classic rock or country.  

“Your cat’s been moping around, so we’re going to take her to the vet.”  This message didn’t really alarm me.  Susie was getting old, but she was bullet proof. 

When I got back to Great Falls a week later I was greeted at the door by Peanuts but no Susie. “She was sick so we had to put her down” said my father as he fought back the tears. “She had feline leukemia” my mother said.

It was a bit of a shock, but really….Susie was no spring chicken (I think she was at least ten years old at that point) and it’s not like it was devastating.  Cats die. We all die.  And it’s not like I hadn’t thought about it.

Oh, and what was the name of that book I bought at the shopping mall with the ice rink?

“101 Uses for a Dead Cat.”

Maybe I shouldn’t have bought the book?