#they scratch my brain in just the right way

[tojisth3rdwife]

Dog Gone It!

Syn: Aint it funny how when you let your kids get a pet, they immediately become your problem?

cw: crack. Megumi and these damn dogs driving you crazy..

a/n: s/o @sugurugetoshairbrush for the insp❤️❤️

“Hot sauce all in our Top Ramen, ya bish..ya bish, ya bish. Park the car, then we start rhymin', ya bish…” Toji mumbles along to the music filling his car, leaning back in his seat, one hand on the wheel as he sits in morning traffic. The forecast predicted scattered downpours for the whole day, having drenched the city and grayed the skies since early. He sighs bitterly when the motion of the traffic’s flow stalled, clenching his jaw when the car behind him started honking obnoxiously.

Toji was reluctantly on his way to a job that Shiu offered to him the night before. Something quick and easy, a minor shakedown and debt collection that shouldn't take him long. Knowing that didn't make it any easier to leave you this morning. Hell, he could still feel your lips on his neck and jawline as he had to force himself out the door.

No big deal though. He’d get the job done. Run some errands then make his way back to the house so he could enjoy having you to himself for a few hours.

His car had eased a bit further up the crowded road when his mounted phone rings from the front vents. Its a Facetime call from you.

Toji frowns, wondering what would have you Facetiming him this early when he expected you to be back in bed and asleep since Megumi had gone off to school.

Perhaps you were restless and wanted to put on a little show for him, needed his help to get back to sleep. Dirty possibilities spawned in his brain as he lifted his finger to swipe over the phone to answer, a knowing smirk on his face.

Toji’s attention is split between watching traffic and his screen, which he expected to be filled by your sensual expression, shrouded in his sheets and pillows. But no. He’s met immediately with your scowl and disheveled appearance.

You were standing in what he deduced was the living room, with the jingly sound of silver dog collars, heavy panting, and the TV in the background. His white tee you were wearing when he left was stretched at the collar and stained a light brown along with streaks of dirt and wet grass over your chest. Your hair, which was tied up neatly in a patterned silk scarf previously, was uncovered and a mess all over your head as if you’d been in a fight.

It's so shocking that a chuckle bubbled up from Toji’s chest as he sat up in his seat.

“Wha...Babe what the fuck happened to you?” he furrowed his brow and you simply turned the phone towards the floor, which was riddled with huge muddy paw prints and scattered puddles of water at your feet. At that, Toji’s smirk fades.

The camera whips back up to your comically pissed expression, a deranged smile now confusing Toji entirely.

“Guess who forgot to let the dogs back in from the backyard again?”

Toji stares at you blankly for a moment, then drops his head and shakes it when the answer hits.

“Dammit Megs. I had just told that boy...” he mutters, running his hand over his face.

“Yeah, me too. Right after you left, I reminded him to take care of the dogs before he went to school. So when he got on the bus , I assumed he had. But when I got out of the bathroom, I heard them scratching at the back door. They were just out there crying and getting rained on.”

Your voice began to shake with emotion as you moved around the room, mumbling cusses under your breath.

“Then what happened? Why do you look like you just got your ass kicked?” Toji counters at your pause, his choice of words making you laugh dryly.

“Funny you ask! I open the damn door and try to rescue them and those fuckers trample right over my ass and tracked mud and who the fuck knows what else all through the living room. Knocked my mug out of my hands so its hot ass coffee all over me. And now the front room stank like outside and ass..mud and shit everywhere Toji.....”

He hisses empathetically, his expression wrinkling in a grimace.

“Fuck! You got burned?? Is it bad?..” Toji inquires, his eyes lifting to the road and his mirrors as he attempts to switch lanes.

You appreciated his concern for you and would have been all warm and fuzzy inside because of it had you not already been so furious.

“No. No, it doesn't seem so bad. I haven't had a chance to check since it just happened. My shirt is just fucked..Aht aht! GHOST! NO! Nooooo..Getcho ass off that couch...”

Toji looks back down at his phone to find you swatting and baring your teeth at one of the dogs, chasing him away from the furniture.

“Uuuuughh!!! Toji it's big ass doo doo looking prints on the couch!! I just. I can't! I fucking can't..” you whimpered pitifully. All while you were fussing with the animals ruining his house and his woman, Toji was fighting for his life to keep from laughing at the way you talked to the dogs. If anyone else was listening, they’d swear you were rounding up a group of unruly ass children.

Although in retrospect, you kind of were.

A break in the traffic jam allowed Toji to turn down a back road, allowing him to cruise at a higher speed on his way to his destination. You noticed him trying to cover his scarred lips with his fist, a feeble attempt at hiding his smile. You focused your glare on him, quirking your brow.

“Uhm…I don’t see whats so funny. Ima have some words for your son and Im gonna put his animals right back out there in the rain so i can clean my house..” you mutter, glancing over the phone as said animals begin playfully growling at each other over a mangled chew toy.

“AHT AHT!! Don't yall start that shit!!” You yell as Toji responds to your not-so-idle threats to kick them out.

“Please don't. You know they’ll just howl and piss off the neighbors and shit...It's too early.” He shakes his head, coming up on a red light.

“Damn right it's too early! And fawk them neighbors! What about me? Lil is over here prancing around like she did a good thing by knocking my coffee all over the floor. Ghost keep jumping on the couch..” your voice shook as if you were about to cry, which you very well might do. It was close to that time of the month when every minor inconvenience felt major, and major ones seemed catastrophic. Toji knew he shouldn’t have left the house that morning. He just knew it.

“..it smells in here and now I have to mop again and take all the cushion covers off the couch to wash 'em..” you continued ranting, to which Toji listened intently with a wary scowl trained ahead at the busy intersection.

He sighs loudly.

“Im sorry youre dealing with that babe. I really am.” Toji mutters just as the loud sniffing sound has him glancing at his phone to find the camera on your chest. You were bending to sop up the spilled coffee and rain water with a towel when one of the dog’s started investigating.

“Yeah well me too...Stop, Ghost. Move...You have to talk to Megs about this. You let him get these damn dogs and while I love them, they're a pain in my ass today. And now they're just looking at me like they're innocent. Tails just wagging...”

To prove it, you stand and tap the screen to switch to the back camera for Toji to get a look at the dynamic duo himself.

Ghost, the male hound with snow white fur stood with his ears sticking straight up and his tongue dangling from his mouth as he panted happily.

Lilith, his sister with the deep black coat, was sitting beside him gazing up at you with interest, her head tilting curiously.

Both of their tails wagged happily as you stood over them, trying not to swoon over how cute they were in spight of all the destruction they caused in your house. They were just so damn big and rowdy, being less than a year old. You were afraid to see how much damage they could do if they weren't done growing.

Toji regards the big ass puppies with a squint before grunting in amusement, easing forward on the greenlight.

“Well..at least theyre happy..” he smirks, his attention back on driving.

He feels you give him the coldest glare through the phone that makes him chuckle in surrender and shake his head.

“Ok ok..I’ll talk to Megumi about being more responsible and make him scrub the couch when he gets home so just leave it, alright? I’ll handle it.” Toji grips the steering wheel, his forearms flexing subtly as he makes his turn.

The definitiveness of his tone put you at ease immediately because you know for a fact that Toji would handle his broody, hard-headed ass son. As far as the dogs, you knew in a few hours that you’d forgive them and their owner for just being themselves, and the drama of the morning would be another comical memory to join the rest that has accumulated since joining the Fushiguro clan.

A sigh of relief puffs between your lips.

“Good. Thank you. Im gonna go clean myself up. I’ll talk to you later.” You step past the dogs on your way towards the bathroom again, ready to peel the damn coffee stained shirt from your body. The rev of Toji’s engine was audible and the view of him driving comfortable with his huge pecs stretching the front of his standard black tee distracts you from the grumpiness for a few seconds. Unaware of you ogling since he was watching the road, Toji reaches for his mounted phone.

“Alright baby. Don’t kill nobody in the meantime. I’ll be back in a few hours.” He half jokes, tapping his screen. You were in the bathroom by now, turning the faucet for the bathtub to hot before responding.

“Yeah yeah, no promises. Hurry up.” You mutter with a pout. The same one you gave Toji before he left. He chuckles at your expression, rolling his eyes. You scrunch your nose at him before kissing the pads of your middle and index fingers and pressing your stamped smooch to Toji’s face on your phone. He steals a glance towards his phone just in time to recieve the imaginary kiss and your grumpy ‘bye Toji’ amidst the rushing water.

“Uh huh. Bye, baby..” he laughs, making sure to press his lips to his thumb, then his thumb to the camera before tapping the little red circle to hang up.

<call ended>

[misty-zzz]

i know i just posted an ii theory,,, yesterday, BUT i have another one,,,, :3

so i feel like this is something that ive not really ever hear anyone talk about. maybe when the episode was first released, but idk. so if that is so, then whoopsies

anyways its mephone3gs' audio logs

(first off i would love these as a fictional podcast as a fictional podcast enthusiast myself)

ill go through them which one are the easiest to figure out to the hardest (im not adding the last one, thats just a reminder for himself)

obviously, the Adv_Log is the only one we hear. its 3gs when he goes to get the shimmer eggs.

the extra memory recording seems to be like a back up thing - i guess

the study (and JESUS, a four hour study with no breaks???) is a recording for his studies. considering this is before the shimmers attack, i would believe this time was to research and study about the shimmers, so yknow, they can figure out the best way to take eggs WITHOUT getting killed (guess that 4 hours went to nothing)

the lecture, this very well could be just like a school lecture, yknow taking notes and stuff but,,,, this is seemingly right after the shimmers, and what seems to be his most recent recording. i think this was cobs scolding 3gs for letting something like having two other mephones dying, and only being able to get one egg. and then immediately putting him in the supply closet! (although, i have no idea what the title "Charge" means,,, if you have anything about that, then go ahead)

and then lastly, the one that has been scratching my brain the most - Nouveau.

most of yall may not know what this means (let alone, be able to pronounce this). basically the definition is "something newly created". now what does this mean with mephone3gs? I HAVE NO IDEA. i thought it was smth with melife, but that was created by the shimmer egg, plus melife is a mephone4+ thing. and my friend thought it was when he was first created, but obviously theres more audio logs before this (he didnt see that) and i dont think cobs would immediately send him to a suicide mission, he would train him. so WHAT DOES THIS MEANNNN???? is it another meapple product that was introduced at the time? what is in the four minutes and forty eight seconds of dialogue (or monologue, who knows) of something newly created, WHATTTTTTT. and i did more research on what the word ment, and all i know its deprived from the french word for new and its mainly used for rich people. and yeah, cobs is rich. so like i guess theres a connection there,,, BUT IDKKK,,, please help

[ineed-to-sleep]

Made a whole ass piece of Astarion + my tav but I didn't like how the whole thing turned out 🫠 so I'm cropping and sharing the only part of it I'm happy with

[bizarrelittlemew]

reaction gif of the week

[arealtrashact]

Ignore my previous post. My favorite character isn't Homelander anymore - it's this guy.

I'm so serious.

I've rewatched this scene about a dozen times now simply because I get a kick out of seeing 'Homelander' moving so freely / fluidly. Don't get me wrong, I love how composed the real Homelander is (almost) all the time. Hands behind his back, sometimes on his hips if he's feeling really sassy. . .

But I tend to draw him in some very exaggerated poses ( flaunting some pretty out-there color palettes ) so getting to see an iteration of him moving so animatedly while wearing this delighted me on what can only be described as a primal level.

[pastasilly]

more screencap edits with my jim headcanon!

[wigglys-dikrats]

my only problem with pulp is that i can’t inject it directly into my bloodstream

[radarchives]

[amali4m]

some part of me must have died each time that hozier called someone baby

[stingsbf]

danhausen almost calling himself donovan (whoever donovan is 😒🤷)

[dysfunctionalcreature]

help I listened to The One That Got Away by Katy Perry and immediately got hit with KevRiko feels (especially kevriko + my transgirl Kevin headcanon)

[sitizelter]

"Thanks Yuuuki 🥰"

[sad-emo-dip-dye]

when Dazai so much as breathes near Akutagawa

[philcoulsonismyhero]

A thing I've been thinking about a lot as I've been obsessively re-listening to the Rivers of London books on a loop and putting colour coded bookmarks into my paperbacks (in short, being Extremely Autistic about the series) is just how interesting it would be to explore what it would be like to be an autistic wizard in that 'verse.

Like, take vestigia. It's a whole extra category of sensory impressions on top of everything else that you're picking up on, and you only get more sensitive to it the longer you train for. Peter wonders at one point if Nightingale isn't just straight up listening to the magic of the city in order to find out about cases, and even if he isn't doing that he's still got to be picking up on a Huge amount of sense impressions from the magic around him. Would an autistic practitioner be even more sensitive to vestigia? Just how much of a sensory overload trigger would it be, given that it's not a true smell/sound/whatever? Do really skilled practitioners like Nightingale ever get overloaded by just how much they can sense? Would an autistic wizard have to train themselves to shut out their sense of vestigia so they didn't get overwhelmed?

And then there's how you learn magic in the first place, which is a lot of repetition, doing the same thing over and over again until you produce an effect, and then continuing to repeat it until the effect becomes consistent. And you build spells by learning more and more formae, memorising them in the process. Which sounds to me like Such an autism-friendly way of learning to do anything, I fucking love repetition and memorising huge amounts of information.

Also, it's pointed out a bunch of times that Nightingale has almost scary levels of focus. In Broken Homes he spends ages watching CCTV footage, and then a full half hour just staring at the dog batteries at Skygarden. And it's pretty obvious that his level of obsessive focus is what's made him such a powerful wizard, since he's willing to put in the hours of practice, so autistic obsessiveness would be useful too.

(Sidenote, but I'm not sure if I actually think Nightingale is a character I'd read as autistic. He's definitely got a bunch of traits in the right direction, like the single-minded focus, the scary levels of concentration, the things he's very particular about and the way he can miss Peter's sarcasm sometimes, but in his case I think it's more just his personality and training and age, plus all the trauma. But I do think it would be a fun possibility/what-if to explore.)

And when it just comes down to it, I don't think I've ever encountered a magic system that appeals more to the specific way that my brain works than the RoL one, it seems like it would be So fun to learn. Even, tbh especially, the Latin and all the other studying that's also involved. So it does rather entertain me that I've gotten really autistic over a book series that has such an autism-friendly magic system, it feels Good and Correct.

Although. Ben Aaronovitch. My guy. Give me a list of all the formae and how they work, I am Begging you. I've never wanted an in-universe textbook tie-in book as much as I do for this series and Eventually I'm going to get my hands on the TTRPG book and obsess over every little detail of how they've interpreted the magic for that.

[astraystayyh]

I can't explain how OBSESSED i am with this specific part

[lycanlovebites]

I’m having normal thoughts about boys right now ok (I have a deep visceral need to hunt someone through the forest, nothing but the sound of him gasping and breaking through the brush with his heartbeat thrumming like an animal of its own in his chest and in my ears, my paws beating against the earth as I race after him, teeth clicking and practically foaming at the mouth at his scent. Just him and me in the dead of night. And when I finally catch him I pin him to the ground and fuck his brains out under the full moon <3 )

I can be left alone with a pretty guy in the middle of the night under a full moon. Yeah just leave him by the forest :) no yeah don’t worry abt it haha yeah I’m just gonna go out for a run :) it will be good for me and also him. Enrichment :) being hunted by a big werewolf counts as a couples exercise right