#they must feel like exhausted single mothers 24/7

[lady-shadow-and-darkness]

I know that the anime has teen Dazai and Chuuya speaking in their normal voices, but it's infinitely more funny (and accurate) to just headcanon them having voice breaks all the time.

Imagine, soukoku, the most devastating rivals and kissing machines staring down at you menacingly as you come to terms with the fact that you're about to die, the red one starts glowing, you close your eyes and brace for impact, and then...

"AnY LaSt WoRdS?"

All is silent for a moment, before the other one starts laughing hysterically, and you get to crawl away to the sound of two teenage boys yelling at the top of their lungs like preschool kids.

[texanredrose]

Okay, to put some limitations on this, I’m only including the WIPs that I’ve done more than a synopsis for... that I can remember... that’s on Google Drive... that I actually think I might post one day... but haven’t posted yet because my posted WIPs are fairly easy to identify... okay... I got tagged by @unsteadyshade and I’m tagging @faunusrights and @alexlayer69

1) Across Time - Inuyasha AU where Weiss gets thrown back in time to the ancient past, where she meets two demons (Yang and Blake) warring against each other over a misunderstanding.

2) Alpha’s Devotion - Omega’s Strength, but from Winter’s POV.

3) Bears, Oh My - An exhausted Winter, lost on a hike, comes across a cabin where Yang lives with her three pet bears.

4) Brave New World - Continuation of the Dishonored AU where Ruby and Winter reflect on the new Mantle.

5) Bruised - Third installment to the ace!Yang AU. 

6) Coming Home - Based on Dash’s Tiny Knight AU, Princess Blake is betrayed and stranded far from home and must rely on a reticent knight named Weiss to return to her kingdom.

7) Complications Always Arise - Papa Schnee is demanding Weiss marry before he’ll allow her to take his place as head of the SDC, so Yang volunteers to pretend to be Weiss’ beloved. No one else knows the relationship is fake, least of all Blake and Winter, and it’s just a bunch of pain.

8) Divided - Continuation of the By Moonlight AU where Whitley returns to the castle and Winter’s not upset by that- and Winter’s upset by the fact she’s not upset and has to figure out why her inner wolf is cool with this when she should, by all rights, be furious.

9) Dragonsbane - Mage Knight Winter hears tale of a dragon in the countryside that the local villages wish to see vanquished. Winter, however, has other plans.

10) Eye of the Beholder - Blinded and near death after a battle, Winter is rescued by the mysterious Yang and is nursed back to health despite her protests otherwise. (It’s a Medusa!AU.)

11) Fabled - Fable 3 AU where Princess Ruby and Princess Yang are forced to confront the fact that Queen Raven has lost her fucking mind, only to discover that fear drove the woman insane- a fear they must confront themselves.

12) Fields of Love - Farmer Yang offers a job and housing to apparent single mother Winter and her young daughter Penny. What starts as a kind gesture grows into something so much more.

13) Full Circle - Van Helsing (2004) AU, Winter and Weiss, amnesiacs employed by the church to handle all manner of unholy problems, are sent to discover what happened to King Taiyang. Along the way, they become wrapped up in a centuries spanning prophecy and a bloodline hanging in the balance.

14) High Bar, Low Blow - Yang owns a bar where the gimmick is that everyone’s an out of work actor and the staff is staging an ongoing drama on par with a soap opera to keep their customers coming back. Winter joins the staff and then things get a bit real.

15) Hoodlums and Hijinks - Robin Hood AU where Princess Winter and Princess Weiss are just as in favor for overthrowing the king as the group of bandits run by Ruby, Yang, and Blake. 

16) Last One 2: Electric Boogaloo (title subject to change) - a sequel to Last One where the haunt continues.

17) Lexical Access - Sequel to Tip of the Tongue, where Yang gives her girlfriend a bit of roleplaying payback.

18) Little Red - Carmen Sandiego AU where Ruby was kidnapped adopted by a group of thieves and raised to become the world’s greatest thief, but a chance meeting with Penny via a stolen phone opens her eyes to the wider world, and she meets the rebellious heiress Weiss, street smart Blake, and brawler Yang, creating a team that works to foil Ruby’s former friends while eluding capture by mysterious operatives with a somewhat familiar white color scheme...

19) Long Term Investment - Yang, a fae who lives in the woods, makes a deal with Princess Winter to save the Queen. The price? Winter’s firstborn. Winter misunderstands how she’s expected to get pregnant and Yang’s never actually intended to collect. Next thing Yang knows, Winter’s moving into the clearing beside her tree home.

20) Miscalculation - Another Omegaverse AU where Weiss is an omega and Blake and Yang are alphas, except Weiss lied and said she was an alpha when enrolling in Beacon and now she’s locked in a room with Blake and Yang on the verge of starting her heat. Sharing is caring.

21) More Than Words Can Say - Winter, rendered mute by a military accident early in her career, is honestly the best girlfriend Yang’s ever had. However, tonight’s the night they’ve decided to get intimate, and that includes showing some scars that they don’t show often. It’s less about sex and more about trust and intimacy.

22) Music of the Night - Phantom of the Opera AU where the mysterious, disfigured shade of the opera house, Weiss, finds herself at odds with the rich, jovial Yang in a competition for Blake’s heart. Then there’s Adam being a dick, too, and the opera house has never seen so much drama.

23) My Heart Will Go On - It’s the Titanic, but double the rich, unwilling-to-marry ladies and triple the won-a-ticket-to-a-ship ruffians. Penny’s there too; she, like Ruby, just really likes ships.

24) One Fucking Favor - Winter’s due for a long assignment and wants to make a sex tape for stress relief purposes. Yang doesn’t ask questions; she’s just the one with the camera. But then, Winter’s partner for the vid doesn’t show up. What’s Yang going to do about it?

25) Prophecy - Star Wars AU where Ruby, Yang, and Blake are trained as Jedi, Winter and Weiss are part of the clone army, and Ruby’s the chosen one. That’s a lot of pressure to put on someone, but Senator Salem is there to lend a helping hand...

26) Propositioned - Faunus experience bouts of heat; sometimes, they can safely ignore it and go about their lives, but every now and again, they really can’t. Concerned for Blake’s health as she’s skipped too many heats to be healthy, Yang sets up a partner for Blake’s heat. Blake’s not a fan but she does like the idea of banging Weiss Schnee.

27) Proven - ARK: Survival Evolved AU where Winter, after being ‘won’ by Yang, is taken into the bowels of the earth to learn how the underground tribes who inhabit the area survive in such an unforgiving environment. As she acclimates to the tribe’s ways, she finds herself carving out her own path, culminating in facing off against the Queen and proving herself worthy.

28) Reaping What You Sow - When Winter escaped to the countryside with Penny to start a farm, she knew she had her work cut out for her. In need of help and facing a harsh cold season, she hires Yang, a one armed drifter, to help her. The two end up needing the other more than they could’ve imagined.

29) Tear My Heart Open - Blake thought she understood how the world worked. As a member of the White Fang Gang, all she needed to do was keep everyone motivated to continue their ongoing street war against the police and authorities bent on keeping them down. But while running from the cops, she’s offered sanctuary in the home of one Weiss Schnee and her girlfriend, Yang. From there, her perception of the world is completely upended.

30) The Duel - After her father offered her hand in marriage to the winner of a tournament, Winter opted to assume a disguise and fight for the prize herself. In the final match, she faces Yang Xiao Long, a competitor she’s come to know quite well, and she finds her conviction to win wavering slightly. Is it enough to lose her the fight?

31) The Lies We Tell Ourselves - Weiss has made it; she’s opened her tattoo shop in Vale, well away from her father, and aside from a bad first impression with the florists across the parking lot, everything’s looking up for her- until her father finds her. Luckily, Blake’s been through some shit and doesn’t mind helping Weiss drive daddy dearest up the wall, even if it means letting her own parents think she’s dating Weiss. It’s not like either of them is going to catch feelings... unless...

32) The Princess’ Bride - After losing her fiancée to the dreaded White Fang Pirates, Yang vows to take to the sea herself and exact her revenge. Princess Weiss finds herself falling madly in love with Yang, who still loves Blake, and all this is thrown into even more chaos when Yang gets kidnapped and Blake comes back from the dead! 

33) Two for One - Yes, another Omegaverse AU. Five years after the fall of Beacon, Yang and Blake cross paths, each believing the other has spent the time keeping their mutual mate, Weiss, safe. When they realize Weiss is with neither of them, old wounds are torn open, but before they can resolve their dispute, Winter captures the both of them and hauls them to a remote part of Atlas where an SDC facility has been turned into a fortress. There, they find a mortally wounded Weiss clinging to life and raising twins daughters; she gives her mates until her death to endear themselves to their children, else the twins might opt to stay with Winter and be kept from Blake and Yang for good. Between learning about their kids, Blake and Yang navigate their complicated feelings and try to reconnect with Weiss, all while a sinister force gathers to destroy the fortress and steal the prize within.

34) Weaknesses - Loosely set in the Glamour AU, Yang is being forced to assume her mother’s position as leader of their vampire coven. Her fellow vamps disapprove of Yang’s werewolf girlfriend. Winter, of course, doesn’t care.

I got lazy and cut a bunch out. No, fuck you, I don’t have too many AUs, I will add more if I want. Also, some of these, the first chapter is posted on my Patreon. Don’t ask me which ones; I genuinely have no idea. I’m bad at this, y’all.

[ironwoman359]

if you don't have anything for either of these yet: on the run/bounty on their head? roman's a prince, but there's some kind of uprising or assassination attempt and he and his most trusted guard have to gtfo. they're on the run, sleeping in shitty motels (with only one bed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) and roman has to learn to live w/o 24/7 service. you can pick who the guard is.

Safe With You

@badthingshappenbingo

Prompt: On the Run��

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Summary: Prince Roman gains a new appreciation for his personal knight when he is forced into hiding to escape an assassination attempt.

Content Warnings: Mentions of death/violence, some mild bickering, prinxiety (can be platonic or pre-romantic), platonic moxiety

Word Count: 1,645

Read on AO3 here

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Requests are closed

---

Roman had never been so exhausted in his life. His feet were sore, his muscles ached, and there was nothing he wanted more than to collapse into his feather bed and sleep for a day. No wait, a massage from the royal masseuse to ease his muscle tension. No, a massage then sleep for a day. 

Yes, that would be the dream. 

Unfortunately, Roman’s life had been more akin to a nightmare these past few days. He was a prince, for crying out loud, heir to the throne itself! And now he was being forced to sneak through the woods in the middle of the night like...like some common ruffian! 

“You said we’d be reaching real lodgings soon!” he whined. His mother would say that his tone of voice was “unbefitting of a prince,” but he felt that after three days of sleeping rough with no one but his irksome personal knight for company, he was entitled to a bit of complaining. Speaking of his knight...

“We will, highness.” Roman could never figure out how the formal address managed to sound so insulting when Sir Virgil Ellsworth said it. “We should reach it before daybreak, so long as you do not slow us down with any more of your griping.” 

Roman made a petulant noise (that his mother would also not have approved of), but Virgil just rolled his eyes and pressed onwards, slipping through the foliage with the ease of a practiced woodsman. Roman stumbled along clumsily behind him, trying to resist the urge to gripe (he was a prince, he did not gripe...he loudly protested) about the terrain.

He managed this for approximately three minutes, which he thought was a rather impressive effort, giving the circumstances. 

“If your plan was to hide out at an inn then I don’t see why we had to trek through the undergrowth like this. Would it not have been simpler to take the roads? You do know what roads are, don’t you Sir Ellsworth?” 

“You do know what caution is, don’t you highness?” Virgil retorted. “By all means, take the roads, if you want to be caught by the assassins in less than a day.”  

Roman opened his mouth to argue back, but Virgil shut him up with a scathing glare. 

“I know you’re used to being the one to boss people around, Princey, but we’re not in the palace any longer. It’s my job to keep you alive, and out here, what I say goes. Got that?” 

He turned around without waiting for an answer, a breach of protocol that ordinarily would land him in serious trouble, but even Roman had to admit that the systems of etiquette and protocol that he was used to didn’t matter much in the middle of a coup. And as much as Roman had whined and complained (and alright, griped) about their traveling conditions, underneath his brash facade he was just glad that Virgil had remained loyal to him, even after the people who paid his salary had been run through by assassins’ blades. 

Not that he’d ever admit that out loud to his knight of course. 

“Okay, we’re almost there,” Virgil said, pulling Roman out of his musings. “Keep your head down, and let me do the talking.”

Roman glowered at him, but he pulled the hood of his travelling cloak up to obscure his face and followed Virgil without further complaint. Roman wasn’t sure how Virgil knew where they were, the woods all looked the same to him, but one minute they were surrounded by trees and the next they were stepping onto a dirt road that led into a tiny village. Virgil kept glancing around as they approached a building that Roman would call quaint if he wanted to be kind...ramshackle if he was feeling more irritable, which tonight he was. 

“You’re sure this is an inn?” 

“What part of keep your voice down is confusing you?” Virgil hissed with perhaps a touch more venom in his voice than was typical, and Roman blinked.

“Okay, okay, sorry,” he muttered, folding his arms with a huff. 

Virgil sighed and shook his head, then stepped forward and nudged the door open a crack, peering inside. Apparently satisfied with what he saw, he pushed the door open properly and gestured for Roman to follow him inside.

Roman didn’t have much experience with inns, on the rare occasion that he had to travel his entourage would usually solicit the hospitality of a local noble family, so he had no idea if the cramped space was typical of this more...rustic establishment. Still, the room was cleaner than he’d expected; the stone floor was swept, the worn wooden tables were wiped down, and a pleasant, homey smell wafted through the air. It wasn’t hard to imagine the room full of peasants after a hard day's work, enjoying hearty food and drink to forget their hardships for a few hours. 

For now though, the room sat empty, save for one man who was hunched over the fireplace, stirring something in an iron pot. He spun around when he heard the door close behind them, and his eyes widened behind a pair of round glasses. 

“Oh! I wasn’t expecting customers this early in the morning, I–” 

“Pat, it’s me.”

The man froze. 

“Virgil?” he asked, and Virgil nodded. “Oh my– what are you doing here? When I heard about the capital, I was afraid that–”

“I need your help,” Virgil interrupted, and the man nodded. 

“Of course, whatever you need!.”

“A room? And off the books, Patton, nobody can know we’re here.”

Patton’s eyes flickered to Roman for a moment before looking back to Virgil with a firm nod. 

“Of course, of course. This way.”

He led Virgil and Roman up a staircase and down a hall, ushering them into a room. 

“It’s not much, but it’s yours for as long as you need it. And once I’m done opening things up downstairs I’ll come up and bring you some porridge, you kiddos must be hungry.”

“I can pay you,” Virgil began, but Patton shook his head. 

“Keep your money. I have a feeling you’ll be needing it more than me anyhow. Just stay safe for me, okay?” 

Virgil nodded. “Thank you.” 

Patton smiled at him, then with one last glance at Roman, slipped out of the room and back downstairs. Virgil shut the door behind him, then quickly crossed the room and closed the shutters as well, blocking out the first few rays of morning sunlight. 

“Okay,” he said, a bit of tension finally leaving his shoulders. “We should be okay to rest here for a bit. 

Roman looked around the room, and tried not to grimace. It was tiny, barely big enough to comfortably fit the single bed, wooden chair, and side table. No wardrobe, no desk, no vanity, and no lavatory. Still, at least there was a bed. No matter how lumpy the mattress might be, it was sure to be more comfortable than the forest floor. 

“Will this suffice for you, then?” Virgil asked, raising an eyebrow, and Roman sighed.

“It will have to do, I suppose,” he said, and Virgil rolled his eyes. 

“It better, because this is the only inn this side of the capital that won’t sell us out at the first flash of some coin.”

“So that innkeeper, you trust him then?” 

“With my life,” Virgil responded immediately, and Roman blinked. 

“Well alright then,” he muttered. He looked around the room, then frowned as one particular detail stuck out to him. “There’s only one bed.” 

“It’s a roadside inn, Princey, it doesn’t exactly have suites.” 

“I know, I wasn’t exactly expecting the lap of luxury here, but–”

“Relax,” Virgil interrupted. He pulled off his cloak and bunched it into a ball before stretching out on the floor and stuffing it under his head. “I’m all good, see? No need to worry about sharing your bed with the measly common folk.” 

 “I’m aware you’re making fun of me,” Roman grumbled, and Virgil laughed. 

“Good, I’d be worried if that was lost on you.”

“You think just because the world is collapsing around us that you can mistreat me so? I am still your prince.” 

Virgil gave him an unimpressed look, and Roman swallowed, suddenly cognizant of the fact that the only reason he was still alive was because of Virgil’s interference. He’d taken it for granted, Virgil was his knight, after all, it was his job to protect him, but when the rest of the palace had fallen, there would have been nothing stopping Virgil from giving Roman up to save his own skin. Instead, Virgil had taken him to safety, and Roman felt his face warm in shame.

“I apologize,” he said quietly, looking down. “That was...not a very chivalrous remark. I do recognize that it is only because of you that I am even alive, let alone a prince, and...I am grateful for that.” 

He glanced up, just in time to see a strange expression flicker across Virgil’s face for just a moment before his familiar smirk was back. 

“Alright, Princey, don’t get sappy on me now,” he said, and Roman let himself smirk back. 

“Just covering my bases here, I can’t exactly have rumors start spreading that the prince of the land doesn’t appreciate when someone saves his life.” 

“Go to sleep, highness, your precious reputation is safe with me,” Virgil snickered, closing his eyes. 

Roman chuckled, but as he lay back on the lumpy mattress, he didn’t miss the way Virgil’s hand drifted to rest on the hilt of his sword, or how he adjusted his position so that his body lay across the doorframe, one final barrier between Roman and any threat that might dare to enter. 

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, letting his own eyes slip closed. “I know I’m safe with you.”

---

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[rakeshys]

Things you should be knowing as student

1) If you take control of your Sunday, you take control of your week.

2) When assigned a long-term project, finish some amount of work toward its completion that very same day.

3) Start small and start immediately.

4) If you cannot maintain an organized room you will never truly feel that your life is organized.

5) It is important to keep your room clean. And it will make your mother happy.

6) Apply to the scholarships.

7) You should never begin studying without a systemized plan for what you are going to review, in what format, and how many times.

8) Before you even crack your first book, take ten minutes to actually write down exactly how you plan to study.

9) The planning is as important as the process.

10) If you want to become a standout student, you must befriend a professor.

11) Reading a daily paper provides essential food for your ambitious brain. Make sure you don't go hungry.

12) if you are constantly worried about avoiding anything negative, you will never do anything out of the ordinary.

13) Don't let others dictate how you should feel about yourself; strengthen your identity—then go conquer your world.

14) do yourself a favor and give time-blocking a try. It's a much smarter way to manage your day.

15) Remember, giving up, when done strategically, is not a weakness. It's simply smart life management.

16) The happiest students are also the most involved students. When it comes to crafting your slate of collegiate pursuits, the sooner you get involved, the better.

17) always be working on a"grand project "

18) take art history and astronomy before you graduate.

19) Imagine the following scene: Your professor is handing back a major research paper to your class. The groans that begin to fill the room indicate that the professor was particularly demanding for this assignment. And rightly so, it's worth forty percent of your grade. As he gets to your name, he asks you to stay after class. Uh oh. Nervously you wait as your classmates file out, and when you are the only student remaining in the lecture hall, he walks up to you . . . and then shakes your hand. “Congratulations,” he exclaims, “your project was by far the best in the class!”

Sound good? Well, get used to it.

20) One or two good questions a class is enough to keep the professor happy, but not enough to solicit the annoyance of your classmates.

21) Getting involved with research early is like drinking an elixir of success.

22) If you pay your dues with grace and enthusiasm and are mindful of the opportunity you are receiving, you will maximize the many positive benefits of participating in original research work.

23) Take ten-minute breaks in between each fifty-minute chunk.

24) One, it makes you feel better about yourself. If you look good, you can imagine that cute guy or dimpled girl in the front row shooting some glances in your direction. This will make you happy. And when you are happy, you have more energy and pay attention better in class. Two, it makes the day official. When you look like you just rolled out of bed, it's all too easy to imagine rolling back in. If you dressnicely, you are sending yourself the message that you are ready to get started and attack the day.

25) Decorate your room.

26) experience the joy of dominating a test without any hard work,this is done by studying Two weeks in advance.

27) Force yourself to write as much as possible. It is an essential, irreplaceable skill for succeeding. Master it.

28) taking the time to eat a social meal with your friends is a great idea; just don't do it more than once a day.

29) Schedule an escape for yourself every single week. And do it alone. Treat it like taking medicine.

30) “Why waste your time and money in the minor leagues of college courses when you have the ability to be swinging in the majors.”

31) When it comes time to study, go where it counts.

32)The best way to learn difficult material is to go over it by yourself, with a lot of concentration, again and again and again until the concepts become second nature.

33) As long as you are paying so much money to attend college, you might as well maximize what you get out of your investment. If you can get into an honors program, do so. No excuses.

34) The key is consistency.

35) Getting fired up, once or twice a month about subjects that interest you, will go a long to way to helping you succeed. Go to guest lectures and keep your intellectual fires stoked.

36) Don't let the decision to exercise become a debatable question. Instead, make it a habit, like going to class or brushing your teeth.

37) You never realize how important your back-home friendships are until you begin to lose them. Stay in touch.

38) Sleep is just a tool to help you function. Treat your body like a machine—give it exactly what it needs to perform its best, not any more, not any less. Give the snooze button a rest. Try to sleep only the amount you need to make it through the day.

39) The best state for your mind to be in is confident and calm. Take the hour before an exam to relax.

40) Read a nonacademic book. Listen to music that makes you happy. Run a couple of errands. Have a conversation with a friend. Work on unrelated—nondemanding—schoolwork. The key is to keep your mind active and energized, but not exhausted. Then head over to the exam fifteen minutes early. On the way, start to lightly review some material that you feel particularly good about. Imagine yourself writing a strong essay on this topic, imagine the professor handing the class a copy of your essay as an example of a good answer. This technique is more than just shameless ego-stroking, it builds your confidence, and, more important, it warms up your mind in a good and controlled sort ofway. When you arrive at the test location, avoid the temptation to frantically catalog all the concepts you are a little shaky on. Try to keep your mind blank, or, alternatively, continue thinking confidence-boosting thoughts about doing really well. When the exam is finally handed out, take a deep breath and have at it. You should be mentally nimble, rested, and energized by the time your pen hits the paper.

41) If a friend invites you to do something and you are not too busy, find the energy to go. If a friend invites you to do something, and you are really busy, don't go, but make plans to get together later in the week. Most important, if a good friend needs help, drop everything and go.

Making friends your number one priority doesn't mean sacrificing your other obligations, but it does demand that you keep them in mind.

42) Be mature and make the right decisions to keep your mind and body in a condition to perform your best.

43) The point is that there are too many factors that can account for both good and mediocre academic performance on any given day, and none of these factors has anything to do with intelligence.

So save yourself a lot of unjustified grief (or pride), and simply ignore your classmates' grades. Worry about your performance and progress; let your classmates worry about their own.

44) A good listener at college is rare.

45) Don't decide to start working the day before.

46) Find something every single day that will make you laugh.

47) Using a high-quality notebook will not guarantee you success, but it will create the right environment for it to flourish.

48) if you don't actively seek out fun, it won't actively seek out you.

49) Take the most important projects or commitments with which you are involved, and pump up your criteria for success.

50) corporate recruitment sessions, and yes, even parties. In the chaos of classes, extracurricular activities, and a healthy social schedule, these optional events are easy to avoid. Don't avoid them.

51) If you want to be a successful student, forget about your G.P.A. Ignore it. Don't talk about it. Make no attempt to know the numbers. You should approach your collegiate career with confidence and energy.

52) Always go to class!

53) Set arbitrary deadlines.

54) eat healthy

55) don't just volunteer, volunteer quietly.

56) approach every paper as if you were trying to win a Pulitzer Prize for explanatory reporting.

57) Attend political rallies and keep the flame of progressive thinking alive.

58) Once you have decided on a destination, explore many routes to get you there.

59) Don't take breaks between classes!

60) Don't network. But keep your connections strong.

61) If you can maximize the use of your surroundings, you can maximize your performance as a student.

62) Organize the messages in your e-mail in-box like you would your paper files

63) To be a successful student, you must abandon the start-slow, end-fast mind-set, and instead approach all projects by aiming to start fast, end slow.

64) Spend a semester studying abroad.

65) you want to succeed because you love the excitement of pushing your potential and exploring your world and new experiences, if you want to succeed because life is short and why not fill it with as much activity as possible, then you will win. If you approach life with an attitude of never having regrets and always having a hopeful smile on your face, you can find a measure of success in all your endeavors. Don't have no regrets, but have plenty of fun along the way. In the end, that is what it is to really win.

66) “Don't have no regrets.”

The above points are all from the book I read...

Book: - HOW TO WIN AT COLLEGE: - surprising secrets from the country's top student's

Author: - CAL NEWPORT

Anime forever ✌

[creampuffqueen]

Nesryn x Sartaq baby headcanons

Meet all the hot royal people! There’s a lot of them!

- So you see, with all the other royal people it was different

- They just have to produce one heir. One.

-For Nesryn and Sartaq? at least two

-Preferably way more

-The current Khagan is in good health, though, so they have a bit to wait

-Which is good, because Nesryn is still mildly freaked out about the whole 'might become empress of the mightiest kingdom in the world' thing

-With her whole family living in the Southern Continent now, Nesryn is content

-She and Sartaq spend a lot of time in the mountains with the ruks

-And she actually has a part in Borte and Yeran's wedding. Nesryn and Borte pretty much become bffs.

-However, duty calls, and Sartaq must return

-And though he says she can stay in the mountains, Nesryn decides to return with him

-All of the royal siblings have pretty much accepted Nesryn as their new sister. (Some more than others, cough cough Arghun)

-And so they don't mind letting her sit in on important meetings.

-In fact, her advice is often valued

-Although the current empress is a very quiet woman, she takes a liking to Nesryn quickly. She can be seen sometimes, whispering to her son about what a good choice he made in wife

-Though she is very happy in the Southern Continent, Nesryn does miss her friends a lot

-She writes, but it can take months for mail to reach the mainland, so sometimes she just doesn't even try

-When the first Peace Ball is held, Nesryn is over the moon

-But it just takes so much time to get there and back that she and Sartaq admit they really can't go every year. Instead they settle for every other year

-Duva has had her baby, a little boy named Taran

-After his birth, Nesryn mentions that Sartaq should probably tell his siblings what the two of them have planned

-Which he insists she must do as well, since she helped him think of what to say

-So the future empress and emperor tell the other royal siblings this:

-They will break the tradition of killing the opposing siblings. They will leave them to live their lives, so long as they never pose a threat of any kind

-And it hurts Sartaq's heart, but he must say his conditions

-If either of them find out about scheming or betrayal, all the siblings and their children lose their lives. They will not tolerate anything of the sort

-But, thankfully, even Arghun and Hasar, notorious for their scheming, agree to the terms

-Nesryn and Sartaq get married about a year later

-Hasar, Duva, Renia, Delara, and Borte are all there to help her get dressed, and Nesryn has never felt happier

-At least, until she is officially married to the love of her life

-Chaol and Yrene actually make it just in time, and all of Nesryn's nieces, nephews, and little cousins are running around. They've even adopted one-year-old Taran into their group

-The two retreat to the mountains for a month-long honeymoon, because they can

-And they spend a long time in just pure marriage bliss

-Eventually, they return

-And Nesryn gets to work helping out

-She quickly becomes a favorite of the people. Neith's Arrow, their own future empress

-Thankfully, with the Southern Continent having such a casual culture, nobody minds Nesryn wearing riding leathers or sparring clothes around the palace. So long as she dresses up nicely for formal events, they couldn't care less

-She is able to spend a lot of time with her family, baking sweets in their kitchen

-Their sugared almond puffs can put even the palace cooks to shame

-Everything is good, peaceful, and happy

-When they attend a Peace Ball, Nesryn manages to find herself enamoured with the little Fae babies running around everywhere. Aelin and Rowan make some damn cute kids

-And Nesryn can't really help herself

-On the trip home, she gets a terrible case of seasickness

-But when it doesn't stop, even after being home for weeks, she and Sartaq start to suspect something is up

-And, sure enough, Nesryn is pregnant

-To say they are ecstatic is an understatement

-It isn't long before everyone in the palace knows

-Everyone congratulates them, even Arghun, who looks very slightly pissed off the whole time

-Sartaq is a bit of an overbearing mother hen throughout the whole thing, even though Nesryn promises him she's fine

-She spends a lot of time with her sister, because Delara has had four kids already, you know?

-And also she's craving sweets 24/7

-Nesryn actually goes past her due date, and that sucks because she feels like a whale

-At this point she's like "Sartaq I can't believe you did this to me"

-When she finally goes into labor, it's a blessing

-Duva is there, because despite her vapidness, she has had a baby and knows what Nesryn needs

-Delara doesn't get the message until later, and arrives right before Nesryn starts pushing

-With her sister and sister-in-law coaching her, Nesryn has the strength she needs to give birth

-It's a beautiful baby boy with his father's face

-Sartaq is so in love with his new son and with his amazing, incredible wife

-They name him Kasem, which means 'happiness'

-Kasem grows up with tons of aunties and uncles. He always has someone to watch him, no matter what time of day

-They take him to the mountains when he is six months old, in the middle of summer so he doesn't have to spend the night in the cold

-Kadara and Salkhi love the little babe a lot. They are gentle, even when he tugs on their feathers

-Borte is absolutely in love with her little nephew

-A year after Kasem's birth, Duva and her husband have a baby girl named Haya

-And when Kasem is two, Borte and Nesryn both become pregnant

-Nesryn spends most of her pregnancy in the mountains with Borte, and the two are practically joined at the hip

-Her second pregnancy is much easier, though she still has awful morning sickness in the beginning

-Borte gives birth first, to a baby girl she names Indra

-Nesryn is not far behind, having her second baby barely a week after Borte

-It's a girl as well

-She is named Dara, which means 'pearl of wisdom'

-And sure enough, little Dara is very wise

-She always seems to be very smart and mature for her age

-Around the same time Nesryn and Borte have their babies, Arghun's wife has their first child, a girl named Maleia

-Dara likes her cousins a lot, though she is always closer to Indra than Maleia

-In the coming years, more babies are born

-Borte and Yeran have another little girl named Varsha, and Arghun becomes a father to another daughter, who he names Vanida

-For Nesryn and Sartaq, they are content with their little family, for the time being

-Dara loves books a lot, and when she goes to her first Peace Ball, she becomes best friends with Aris, Dorian and Manon's daughter

-She is also the darling of the public. She loves people and attention at all times

-Kasem is a very confident little boy, often boasting that he can beat anybody at anything

-Needless to say, he gets a few lessons in losing graciously

-Kasem and Dara are best friends as well, and they love to be around their (much) older cousins and baking with their mother's side of the family

-When Kasem is eight, Nesryn finds out she is pregnant again

-Since it's been a while since her last pregnancy, this one is fairly difficult. She stays in the palace a lot and is tired all the time

-But she thankfully delivers a health baby girl she names Dhyana, which means 'meditation'

-She's only just getting used to having a new baby when...

-Nesryn finds out she's expecting again

-She isn't sure how to feel. She's happy for another baby, but she doesn't know if she's prepared to have two little ones at the same time

-But, she knows she's going to have a lot of help

-I would also like to add... Sartaq is an amazing father

-He is so very patient, with his kids and with others

-No matter what, he always makes time for them

-He grew up feeling distant from his parents, and he doesn't want that for his children

-And Nesryn, she's a great mom

-She's definitely the fun parent

-The kids love to watch her because everything she does is just so mesmerizing

-And she's a great singer

-When she's on the mainland, people often ask her and Rowan for duets because they have amazing singing voices and they sound pretty good together actually

-But she always sings her kids to sleep

-And every single time Sartaq falls in love with her all over again

-No matter what kind of day they've had, whether they argued or they just cuddled all day, Sartaq can always count on hearing her sing to their kids

-The next baby they have is a little boy

-His name is Ronin, which means 'warrior'

-Ronin is the shyest of Nesryn and Sartaq's children

-He gets along well with Dara, because he likes to read and create

-The same year he is born, Kashin and his new wife have a baby boy named Haider

-Sometimes Nesryn will just find him wandering around the palace halls, lost in his own little world

-Two years after Ronin's birth, Hasar and Renia announce that they are going to have a baby

-The man who did it is kept a closely guarded secret, but nobody really cares about him

-Hasar and Renia have a baby boy named Rangsey

-And Nesryn... wants another baby

-Which she never thought she'd say, seeing as she has four kids already

-But Sartaq agrees wholeheartedly, and Nesryn finds herself pregnant again

-This pregnancy... is tough

-It's the hardest one she's ever gone through

-She's terribly exhausted all the time, sometimes even so tired she can't tuck her kids in. Sartaq is not a good replacement singer

-Thankfully, though, the terrible pregnancy leads to an easy birth, with a beautiful, healthy baby girl at the end

-This baby is the last one Nesryn will ever have. She is sure her family is complete

-The baby is named Akira, which means 'intelligent and bright'

-Akira is a little warrior. She adores watching the soldiers train

-When she is two, her family travels out to the plains of the horse-people to visit Kashin's new son, Kiran

-After taking one ride on a horse, Akira never wants to leave

-Of course, she must, but there are a lot of tears that day

-All the kids grow up in a palace full of aunties, uncles, and cousins everywhere

-They are adored by the people, and by their parents

-And every time she looks at them, Nesryn can hardly believe how far she's come

-A lowly guard patrolling Adarlan's slums, and suddenly she's in line to be the empress of the strongest empire in the world, with an incredible husband she loves with her whole heart and five amazing children

-Nesryn has found her place

-In the story Worlds of Fire and Darkness, Kasem is 18, Dara is 16, Dhyana is 9, Ronin is 8, and Akira is 5. There are so many other kids but know they range from 22 to 3.

[thekpopcloud]

Hyunjin as your boyfriend

(gif not mine! credit to owner!) hello, yes, i love Hyunjin with my whole heart

confession:

hwang hyunjin...a whole sweetheart..your best friend

has been in love with you since you were about...14?

to everyone,,,except you,,,it was obvious this boy was head over heels

but y’know it’s the cliche problem, he doesn’t wanna confess and potentially mess up your friendship

so after giving it a hell of a lot thought he decides to do something...cute

by that i mean, love letters, hand written ones

over the course of a few weeks, you started getting little notes at your house, from an unknown person

whoever the person was, you thought, must be amazing and absolutely in love. The notes were cheesy as all hell

“You’re the light of my life” “Seeing your smile makes my day brighter” “I wish i could call you mine” “I love you”

you were flattered, honestly, but...you had a crush on certain best friend

and in the back of your mind, you were secretly hoping the letters were from him.

one day you get the letter, as usual, but instead of cheesy compliments...it was an address and a single sentence.

“Meet me here, 2:30, i think it’s time we talked face to face”

and you did just that...but not before sharing your location with your friends just in case

the place on the letter was a cute, small cafe on the corner of the street.

you go in, take a seat, and wait.

10 minutes a person rocks up and sits in front of you, you looked up and swear your heart stopped

“Hyunjin?!”

He was sat there, shyly smiling, a envelope loosely sitting between his fingers

“Hi...” he whispered, not saying anything as he placed the paper in his hands on the table and slid it towards you.

you had a feeling you knew where this was going, your heart beating so loudly in your chest as you opened the letter.

“Y/N, if you haven’t guessed already...the letters were from me. I like you, a lot, a bit too much if anything...and it sounds so cliche but i didn’t wanna tell you because i don’t wanna loose you. You’ve been there since day one and i never wanna loose you. If you don’t like me back then i understand but i hope either way that this doesn’t affect us. - Hyunjinnie”

tears? yeah they were in your eyes, threatening to break free.  

You got up out of your chair so fast, practically falling over the table to get to Hyunjin, wrapping your arms around him.

“I like you too, Hyunjin, i like you too”

first date:

nothing too romantic, but not anything boring

a date at the theme park

there would be no point tryna convince him, he’s dragging you on every ride with him

unless you really really hate roller coasters, then he’ll let you off

takes half a billion pictures of you when you’re not looking

cute couple photos

he’ll buy those cute headbands and wear it all day

if you want something, he’ll get it without a seconds thoughts

ends up getting hyped up on sugar and acts like a five year old

the two of you stay at the theme park ‘till its dark, opting to walk home and enjoy the night sky

Hyunjin purposely detours to Han River so he can spend more time with you

“Let’s stay a little longer, i wanna spend more time with you”

when you finally get home he pulls you into the tightest hug he could

decides to be a silly little romantic and takes your hand in his, bringing it up to his face, pressing a kiss to the back of your hand.

the both of you couldn’t stop smiling the rest of the night

first ‘I love you’:

oof more cliches here

probably happened relatively early in your relationship  

it was a spur of the moment thing

the weather in Seoul had been not so good at the time

to put it simply...it was raining cats and dogs outside

and Hyunjin being the childish bean he is...wanted to go outside

“It’s pouring it down out there, Hyunjin you’ll get sick!”

“But baby~ Please~ 5 minutes?” he pleaded with puppy eyes and a pout

what were you meant to do? Say no? No way

all in all you both ended up outside, dancing in the rain

the street was practically empty, with a few passers by giving you strange looks

as the rain got heavier, he pulled you towards him and started spinning you around

to anyone seeing it, this looked like a scene from some sappy romance film

both you were smiling and giggling like two kids in love, ‘cause that basically what you were

Hyunjin finally stopped spinning and pulled you into him, looking down at you with smiling eyes

Before you realize it, he’s leaning down closer to you.

“I love you” it comes out as barely a whisper before he places his lips on yours

you shared the first ‘i love you’ and first kiss on the same night...lucky you

first argument:

we all know he’s very passionate about dancing and all that jazz

and sometime he forgets to take a break, eat and get some rest

so..you being the amazing soul you are, decided to rock up to the studio so that Hyunjin doesn’t work himself to the point of exhaustion

“What are you doing here?” Hyunjin asks..well more or less snaps at you

shocked, you hold your hands up in defense. “whoa don’t give me that attitude, what’s wrong with you today?”

he was growing frustrated and you could see that, but decided to ignore it

“Nothing, i’m fine, why are you here?”

“you need to take a break and eat something, you’re obviously exhausted”

“I’m fine” he scoffs in annoyance, slowly becoming angry

“no you’re not! look at you! you need to get some sleep and food!”

He finally snaps, turning around to face you. “Last time i checked, your weren’t my mother! You don’t have to keep an eye me 24/7 like i’m a child or something, i can take care of myself!”

You weren’t having him speak to you like that. “Well clearly not because look at you! When was the last time you ate something or actually rested?! No, I’m not your mother, but I’m your partner and i don’t want to see you working yourself to death!”

Without letting him reply, you left, letting the door slam loudly.

when you were gone he finally snapped out of it and collapsed onto the floor sadly

he’d fucked up and needed to fix it

kisses:

this boy

istg

he loves kissing you

i mean have you seen his lips? who wouldn’t wanna kiss him

if he has a chance to have his lips on you then he’ll take it

that being said, making out seems to happen quite often

like,,,every other day

and uhm...good luck hiding the hickeys he ends up leaving on ya cause there will be a lot, and they will be dark

long story short he wants everyone to know you’re his

usually his kisses are long sweet passionate ones full of love but good luck when he’s jealous...he’ll have no mercy

hugs:

Hyunjin? You mean a koala

clings to you like a baby koala all the time, his arms tightly wrapped around you.

Hyunjinnie is a tall boy, so usually he’ll casually wrap his arm around your shoulders and pull you into his body

back hugs are his favorite because he can lean on you

if he’s stressed or tired or upset he’ll basically be begging for cuddles from you

despite probably being larger/taller than you he has a habit of curling up into your side after a long day and falling asleep

overall:

this boy is pure boyfriend material

everyone needs a guy like Hyunjin in their life

[ateliefloresdaprimavera]

Our Little Eden

Note :I refuse to accept that awful ending that Ryan Murphy created. So, this is my take on the event after Michael “dies”.

Thank you for all the wonderful authors out there” You guys are my inspiration!

English isn’t my first language, I apologize for my errors.

                                       .  .  .

         The first memory I have of my life are not pictures, but a feeling, so powerful that stood by me for my entire existence.

         Loneliness

         Not by abandon or negligence; my parents were always kind and caring with me. Our home was usually filled with relatives. They came and went all the time.

          And yet, I always felt like I was the odd one out. Like a puzzle piece that didn’t fit.

          And, in time, the other pieces started to make sense to me; not thanks to my doctors my mom insisted on taking me every week, or the daily exams my dad made me do.

         “How can she already know how to read?”

         “How does she know that, Margot? Chess is a tricky game, even for adults!”

          “Where did she learn how to count? She can barely walk”

            No. It was from the conversations I picked on when the adults were in the rom. That’s where I heard from the first time words such as “study”, “immaculate” and “conception”.

            What did they meant?

             It was from during that time strange people start to come to our house.

               After they left, I remember sitting on my window’s balcony and look at each face; not a single adult was looking at me, their focus was on my parents. Talking as if I wasn’t present.

              “She’s such a delicate little thing.”

               But I saw them. Every single one. Inside out.

               That was when I realized. I was nothing like them.

 .   .   .

               It happened at night. It was pouring and the noise my window was making when the wind crossed it seemed like an howl. Except that wasn’t what woke me.

               It was the first time I dreamt of him.

A little boy, same age as me. He was alone, like me, crouching on the floor, next to a bed, playing with water. I wanted nothing more than to go and play with him.

               “Hi” Silence.

               “I’m YN. Do you wanna pla…” I stood beside him, getting a full view of the scene. It looked like he didn’t hear me.

               “You…”  my bile went straight up. TI still remember it: It wasn’t a pool of water he had under his hands. It was blood.

               There was a dead puppy under the bed, and he was just starring at it, still as a statue.

               I shouted and yet, he didn’t notice me.

               I woke up kicking and screaming from the top of my lungs. When my mother came to me and I told her about the little boy with bloody hands, she dismissed me, like it was something normal.

               “You’re a very special child, YN. There’s a lot going on inside that pretty head of yours.”

               Except, this wasn’t my creation. That much I knew. Which is why I couldn’t sleep on that room by myself after. I sat on the ground and, on it’s darkness, I kept staring the night sky from my window.

               I don’t know how long I was there, just that I wasn’t moving .My body felt frozen, still my mind seemed to float.

               “It’s alright YN”

               A voice, that was coming through me. Except, it wasn’t. It wasn’t like any voice I’ve ever heard.

               At same very same moment, a flash cut the sky and, if I had looked behind me ,I’d see a shadow of two silhouettes on my back.

.   .   .

               I don’t like people.

               No, that’s not true. I do. I’m just not interested on them.

               That was much certain to me when things started to change.

               To me was like an invisible pull and a whispering, showing me what  people wanted me to do.

               The first time, I was playing on our backyard while dad worked with the chainsaw. He fell, and when I got close enough, his body was in a weird position.

               “Daddy?” That was my first contact with death.

               ”Help him” It said “You can help him YN”

               My hands were drawn to his wounds and, instantly, it closed.

               “You did good” the voice said.

               But that was not what my daddy told me.

               “What did you do girl?”

.  .  .

               People are hungry.

               No matter how much they have, still is not enough.

               I could help people.

               I wanted to help them.

               Until, I didn’t anymore.

               From terminal illness, wounds, broken limbs, to venereal diseases and paper cuts.

               It was never enough for them.

               My parents opened our doors 24/7 to strangers. And they just couldn’t stop coming.

               “A gift” that’s what they called it “Must be shared”

               I was exhausted.

               And no one cared about me.

               I was three years old.

.  .  .

                 If I didn’t have a moment to rest while I was awake, I had when my parents let me sleep. And dreamt with the little  blond boy .It was reassuring, seeing him, there was something that brought me calm.

               Even knowing that he hurted someone.

               Every time I called, screamed for him, always. But he kept getting further and further away from me.

               My worst nightmare was to never be able to dream with him. The little boy I wanted so much to call my friend.

               Because, otherwise, I would be completely alone.

.  .  .

                 To me, it was something natural.

               I went to bed as  a little girl in my bed, and woke up with my parents screaming.

               “WHO ARE YOU?!”

               “Good morning daddy.”

               “MARGOT,GET IN HERE!”

.  .  .

              I was tall! Enough to reach thing on the top shelf; my legs allowed me to run faster through the backyard. I was even taller than my mamma!

              And the voices keep whispering to me.

             “What do you want me to do Lucas?” I heard my mom on the phone one day “Money? But we already charged…”

            “Excuse me, missy” I got my attention towards the person in front of me. And the line that followed. Each day it got bigger and bigger, and the voices just kept pushing me.

             “Be good. Have patience. Help them.”

             It was as if I was stuck inside a wheel. Give and give and give.

             And my parents charged from others?

            I found out when I was speaking to a woman that didn’t want to admit that her husband left her.

           “Ma’am, what can I do?” I didn’t understand any of that. How do I fix emotions?

           “I paid good money for your results, young lady !You have to fix this!”

           What?

. .  .

            Is that what you want me to do?

           I wasn’t allowed to leave my room anymore “Too distracting” my parents said. Every moment there was buzz downstairs. Clothes delivery ,new furniture, desperate people paying  a lot of money to talk to me about their “problems”. Futile and shallow.

           It was all my parents wanted.

            Is this humanity? Personal  and immediate interest ?Material rewards?

           I figured it out. The more I kept to myself, more I could absorb from others. It wasn’t just about mom and dad and their growing gluttony; it was everyone else. People were desperate about things that didn’t concern them; always blaming others for their faults; waiting for someone else to fix their mistakes.

         Yes

        I took one of my dad’s cigarettes, the ones he stashed from my mom. At night I could walk freely on the house without anyone disturbing me. They thought they could control me.

       “Argh, this is horrible” Why do people use stuff they know is not good for them?

       “Are they that dumb?” I stopped in front of their bedroom. Mom and dad looked so peaceful, swallowed by the materialistic opulence of everything they didn’t need ,but want. And me, their  golden goose.

       “This is not what I want” I whispered as my mom moved .She was still sore, plastic surgery does that to you, she said. And dad was also sore, from screwing his PA.

        “You are all so little” How could God allow such people to exist?

        “Don’t think about it ,YN. That’s not your job. Be good, help them” The voice spoke .Only, this time, for the first time, I noticed how it hesitated.

         Fuck you.

. .  .  

         I never looked back. That’s not where my life was going. I let go .Of everything.

         My parents ,that house, people.

          And then, my path was clear.

         It was as if an arrow guided me to my destination. The little boy, only now he wasn’t so little .He grew ,like me. And he needed help.

          Michael.

. .  .

         It was too late.

          He was stretched out on the ground. Blood all over, his body twisted in painful angles. That wasn’t suppose to happen.

         “No, no, no” I cradled his hand, leaning towards him. There was no one near .Please, please

          “Please, Michael. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.” I was sobbing uncontrollably. What was the point of all that violence? “Open your eyes, please”.

         I don’t know who or what made it possible, but he opened them and, for a split second, I couldn’t breathe. They were the bluest color I’ve ever seen.

        “Who…”He was choking on his own blood, and yet, something in his eyes said that he knew who I was. “I know…you”.

        “Yes! You know me, Michael! You’ve always know me” My whole body was shaking, he was coming back! His wounds were closing and the color of his body was coming back.

         “I couldn’t hear you. I wanted to. I saw you, but I couldn’t.”He was gripping me with such force, unnatural for someone who went through what he did, but I wasn’t letting go.

         “I know ,I tried to reach you. All this time I’ve been so alone” My tears mixed with his. It felt like a weight has been lifted of my soul.

          “So did I YN”

          When he said this, it was as if the wheel was broken. There was nothing or anyone more important in this planet.

         “Now we don’t have  to walk alone”

. .  .

Mallory’s POV

          It was another sunny day, and my sisters and I decided to enjoy. Madison wanted new clothes, and apparently an entourage/audience as well. Reminiscences of her Hollywood days, I guess. It’s not like I didn’t mind to go.

          Ever since I came back, I let go of petty things, fights that wouldn’t add up to my life. The world was safe, and all was well.

           I never told anyone about it. And that’s fine, because I know that what matters is preserved.

           I wasn’t really paying much attention to Madison and Zoe’s daily quarrel, nor Coco and Quennie wanting to go in a different direction, or even how bright and sunny it was.

           “Hey, watch it!” I was so absorbed in my mind that I only realized Madison was cursing at pets when they crossed the street.

            “It’s just kittens, Madison” A black and white one ran straight to a couple on the other side.

             “Yeah, well, contrary to popular belief, not all witches like cats”

              They’re an young couple. The man was tall, blond and wore black from head to toe. The woman was tall as well, long hair. She was wearing a blue dress. They walked gazing at each other, which is why I couldn’t see their faces, but from their body language, even a blind man could see they were in love. It seemed that the cats made wave for them.

              “I hate those furry things.”

               For some reason, I couldn’t stop to stare at them. The street was crowded, and it was not as if they stood out from everyone else. It looked like a simple sight: an young couple walking down the street.

               It was their posture. From the way they walked together, I couldn’t see where one started and the other ended.

                Something looked awfully familiar.

                Shit

. .  .

 Third Person’s POV

               “What’s the matter my love?”The man asked, tightening his hold on his companion’s waist.

“               You know what. The witch is watching us” The woman pouted. He loved when she did that. He loved everything about his love, and the fact she cared so much more about his safety than hers, only made him love her more and more.

                “I know, wife .But really, does she even matter to us?”He asked, his her forehead.

                   From the moment Michael met YN, nothing else mattered. Not his so called family, whom never wanted him; nor his father, who left him at mercy .Not even his “great purpose”, to bring destruction to the world. Nothing.

                   Only his YN. His  friend. His companion. His wife. His soulmate.

                  She helped him, accepted him as he was and loved him since they were children.

                  That’s real love .It’s what he always craved for, but never knew, until they found each other.

                  His true purpose.

                   Was to be with her.

                   “No” She sighed, leaning on him. Like always, words weren’t needed for the other to know what they were thinking.

                   “She doesn’t matter to us”.

[and-sometimes-i-draw]

Draw Everyday Challenge: 2019

This challenge was created by myself and @markiplieristoblame

The rules:

           The point of this challenge is to draw something at least once a day and document it to hold yourself accountable. The drawing can be a full illustration or a simple sketch the only rule is you must have shown some effort. Don’t just draw a smiley face or a stick man to get out of missing a day, draw a smiling stick man doing something. You are not limited to pencil and paper, draw every day sounded nice but painting, sculpting, textiles, etc. all count. Your work of art may have taken seconds or it may have taken hours but in accordance with the rules a work of art can only count for a single day. For example, posting a progress sketch of a larger illustration can count for one day but posting the final illustration a week later does not count for another day. Feel free to post and share more artwork than needed, but this challenge is meant to make you find something to draw and draw it each day whether the inspiration be from life or from your mind. The point of this challenge is to force you to look for things to draw even after you have exhausted your go to drawings. This will help you to draw outside your comfort zone, learn new shapes, and see more things that you want to draw in the world as well as give you practice to improve your drawing skill. From beginner to expert this challenge can encourage you to improve and for those, like myself, who struggle with motivation we have introduced a motivator. Punishments. Following are a list of punishments (hopefully you won’t need more but if you do feel free to get creative!) Life happens, and we all know that. Many of these punishments are harmless. If there are any that you cannot perform due to religious or cultural constraints, please replace them with your own. If you just really don’t want to do one, all the more reason to draw! Should you find yourself with an emergency, you are granted one free pass for every 30 days you draw in succession. This is all up to the honor code but I hope you will participate to the fullest of the rules as it will bring you the most satisfaction come 12/31/19 when the challenge comes to a close. Now, what is a punishment if you can just say you did it? For a punishment to be considered complete, you must record video proof of your completing it and post it to the same account you have been drawing on with a tag or description containing the day the punishment is replacing. This may all sound harsh, but it is because I have so much faith in you to succeed. If you are going to participate in this challenge please post these rules on your blog. Punishments must be completed in numerical order. Yes, there are some easier ones down the line but that is because if you miss that many days we figure you need a break. If you found this after the first of the year it is not too late. For the number of days you have missed since 1/1/19 you may draw 2 drawings a day to compensate without punishment. THIS IS THE ONLY TIME THAT DRAWING TWO IMAGES THE NEXT DAY WILL BAR YOU FROM THE PUNISHMENTS ACCORDING TO THE OFFICIAL RULES. If you are planning to participate and use this challenge as a baseline for your own rules, please reblog this with your changes to the rules so that we can consider those changes for the official rules should this challenge be hosted next year. I wish you all luck in your pursuits, now on to the punishments!

 Punishments:

1.    Publish an apology video

2.    Write “I will not miss another day” 50 times on any surface

3.    Do a piece of art in a medium you usually don’t

4.    Sing a song (karaoke is fine but no lip syncing)

5.    Dance on camera

6.    Caramelldansen (if you aren’t old enough to remember look it up)

7.    Show us your bedroom. Now!

8.    Do an exercise on video

9.    Walk a dog. If you don’t have a dog borrow one.

10. Review a product in your home

11.Go somewhere in your town that you have never been before

12.Go for a hike (complete the hike)

13.Make a collage of pictures of what matters most to you (minimum 5 pictures)

14.Attend a local class or function (school courses do not count this is an elective attendance)

15.Go to your local grocery store in a costume (this punishment must be completed at least a week before or after Halloween. Delay it if necessary.)

16.Find an instrument and play it as best you can in a video

17.Create a tutorial for a piece of art you feel confident in (if you are a new artist, follow a tutorial online and film that instead)

18.Cook something and film the process

19.Review the nearest red product to you (if you are colorblind or otherwise visually impaired reach out to your left without looking and review the third object you touch.)

20.Learn to say “I promise to try and do better” in another language and film yourself saying it.

21.Take a self-care day and post pictures and a list of your activities. You do not have to be in the pictures.

22.Call a relative over 50 years old and explain a meme they are not familiar with to them. (Obtain consent from the relative first if you plan to include their audio in the video.)

23.Go to the site nyan.cat (not sponsored) and listen for a minimum of 30 minutes.

24.Write “DRAW” on the back of your hand. (If you are prevented from doing this by occupational or otherwise binding restraints, write it on adhesive notes and stick one to either side of every door in your home)

25.Text a friend who in not aware of the challenge “art is shrek and skrek is <3 so art is life bro [eggplant emoji]” including the typos and lack of capitals. You cannot explain for a minimum of 10 minutes after they have read and/or responded.

26.Call the fifth contact in your phone without explaining why to them first. (Obtain consent from the person you called before posting any audio with their voice. If they do not consent and you do not have a way to remove that audio from your video, post a picture of your contacts showing just the names and then a picture showing them in your recent calls.)

27.Call your mom and explain the challenge to her and that you accepted it. Admit that you have missed 27 days so far and provide her with a link to where you are posting your art. (If your challenge has contained NSFW art just show her your punishments and at least 5 SFW drawings. Obtain your mother’s consent before including her in the video. If she does not consent post a video summarizing your experience with this punishment.)

28.Eat something you hate on camera.

29. Post a piece of art to Facebook for all your family to see. (If you or your family are not on Facebook, text the image of your art to at least 10 people.

30.Watch Nanalan’ for a minimum of 20 minutes. You can find it on YouTube.

The most important part of all of this is to have fun. This is meant to help you improve and stay accountable, not to be torture. Lets draw some stuff and have a great time. Feel free to suggest additional punishments to be added. If either @markiplieristoblame or I need additional punishments we will be sure to post a list here and on her blog.

[killianmesmalls]

A Christmas Story

I am so behind on 25 Days of Wish Hook! At least this will help a little. It started one way and then kind of just... happened. So, I’ve been reading some different versions of Rogers inviting Tilly places or taking care of her, and I adore every single one I’ve seen so far. Then I thought... what if one time Tilly is the one to reach out?

Chapter: 1/2

Warnings: Nothing explicit, but mentions of unpleasant group home and foster situations, plus the mention of death... just in case that’s a concern for anyone. 

Summary: After Alice pries Roger to tell her his “story”, she begins to realize how much their home lives have in common. With no other family to speak of, why not spend Christmas together?

“So, detective, what’s your story?”

He fumbled the bishop in his hand, the plastic piece colliding with an unfortunate pawn. “My story?” “You know what I mean,” Tilly insisted, leaning back into the booth at Roni’s, the gentle buzz of a few fellow diners and midday drinkers acting as a soundtrack to their chess game. “You know a bit about me—the group home and where I live, all that. What about you?”

He raised a playful eyebrow. “You want to know where I live?”

“You’re stalling and you know it. Come on. Out with it. You weren’t just born a surly cop. At some point, you must have been a surly child.”

“Funny. Come on, your move.”

She crossed her arms and stared, the hint of a grin creasing the corner of her mouth. Perfect, she just had to be as stubborn as, well, he was. Someone somewhere was laughing at him, he thought. Likely his older brother, his voice even now echoing in his head: You were born a damn mule, I swear.

Well, he supposed, that was at least a starting point.

“I had an older brother. He was seven years older than me. Took care of me after our mother died and our father… went to the store and never came back, as they say. We didn’t have any living relatives aside from each other and our bastard of a father. So, at first, we went together in a group home probably a lot like yours. Sometimes foster care. The same general story.”

She nodded, her arms falling to her sides. Yeah, she knew it well. The feeling of being lost and knowing no one was out there looking for you. “It must have been nice to have someone around.”

He gave an affirmative hum, a fog settling over his eyes for a stretch. Tilly watched as he drifted, knowing better than to interrupt. She had been there. She felt the haze of memories pull her back to some other time and place. Sometimes even moments that weren’t real memories flooded her mind’s eye—images of a high window and a time she felt sheltered but safe. Loved. Not real, she knew, but a pleasant distraction to believe in from time to time.

She almost felt herself drifting, too, when he spoke again. “I was eight when we went into the system together. He protected me from a few of our less-friendly foster parents or siblings. Took the brunt of things for me, even though I was the troublemaker.”

“You? Trouble? I thought you were practically born with that badge.”

Rogers chuckled, toying with the rook he had managed to capture. “No, far from it. I had a smart mouth and a lot of attitude when I was growing up. After my father left, I didn’t really care too much for authority and didn’t really trust anyone. Liam, my brother, did what he could to keep me out of trouble, but I was really bloody good at it and he couldn’t monitor me 24/7.”

Tilly chewed her lip, her nimble fingers twisting a loose thread at the end of her flannel shirt. “What happened?”

“When he was eighteen and aged out, I would usually try to run away to be with him. Even when he lived in a car for three months, I kept trying to stay with him. He would usually bring me back if I was staying somewhere halfway decent. Took me to our social worker if the place wasn’t… Anyway. H would tell me he was working to get a steady place, and even wanted to sign up for the police academy. When he signed up, he fought to get custody of me. Only…” He rubbed a hand over his face and closed his eyes. The creases in his forehead seemed to speak to her even when he didn’t. Why am I saying all this? This is too much. I should quit while I’m ahead.

Without thinking, she reached out and placed a hand over his prosthetic. The pressure on his wrist brought him back to the present, back to her and the soft smile she gave him. His forehead relaxed and his breathing eased. Something about her, something about her presence and that look in her eyes that felt damn familiar somehow eased his nerves enough for him to continue.

“Only he didn’t get that far. I was sixteen when he died. The doctors said it was some adverse reaction to a medication he started to take, but I didn’t believe them. No evidence, though. No idea who would do such a thing or why.”

“Is that why—“

“I became a cop? Yeah. You can say that. At least partially. I guess I also hoped becoming one myself would make him proud, since he never got the chance.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, wincing as the words fell. They felt so cheap, so hollow. “Sorry” didn’t cover how she felt for him and his story, and it certainly didn’t cover how much she loathed that this man who had begun to treat her like family had lost his own.

“Don’t be. I’m here now and wouldn’t be without him. Anyway, that’s my story. Now, let’s talk about something more pleasant so I don’t have to say I completely ruined your day.”

“You could never ruin my day,” she said suddenly, flushing at the honesty. “I just mean it’s been really nice to have you around the last few months. Someone to talk to. Almost know a little of what having a family might be like.”

“I know what you mean,” he said, this time reaching out to give her hand a squeeze.

She wasn’t sure what made her think of it. Perhaps all the fake trees in the stores she went into to get warm. Maybe it was all the holiday music she kept hearing as people’s cars drove past her troll. Whatever the cause, Tilly began to think of how she would spend Christmas.

For once, there was a friend she could see herself spending it with. Someone who, she now knew, understood how she felt. Understood what it was like to be alone, to be on the outside looking in as everyone else had a loved one to gravitate to, to argue about movies about, to cook a botched meal beside.

She had gotten to know his work schedule over the course of the last few months, and stood at the front door of the station, beaming mischievously with a twelve-pound baked ham in her arms.

“What the bloody hell…?” he started the moment he opened the door. “Tilly, what are you doing?”

“We can’t have Christmas dinner without ham. It’s what all the commercials I keep hearing are saying. Also, apparently Coke is festive but I could only carry one heavy thing, so ham it was.”

“Christmas dinner? Coke? I have no idea what you’re going on about…”

His flustered annoyance washed over her in a heartbeat, wiping away her wide smirk instantly. “It’s… I just… thought…”

Oh. OH! Realization dawned on him, breaking through the exhaustion of eight straight shifts and a pile of paperwork still flipping through the back of his mind. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just tired. Are you saying you, uh, want to do Christmas dinner with me?”

“Well, um,” she squeaked, face flushing. “After you told me about your family, or I guess lack thereof, I got to thinking. You know? Well, I mean, I guess I didn’t think too much. Mostly it was an idea. A couple of ideas. Or, a few ideas that are rolled into one idea. And then there were all those commercials—“

Before she could get too lost in her own sputtering words, Roger’s crow’s feet crinkled his eyes and he gently pulled the ham into his arms. “Tilly? I’d love to have Christmas dinner with you.”

A relieved sigh escaped, her whole face lighting up so much he imagined she looked like a tree-topper—glowing and angelic. A moment of déjà vu hit him but he quickly shook it off and escorted her to his SS Chevelle.

“If I manage to get you to have some vegetables, too, it’ll be a damned Christmas miracle.”

[hellsbellssinclub]

Across the Stars. Part 28

Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3/ Part 4/ Part 5/ Part 6/ Part 7/ Part 8/ Part 9/ Part 10/ Part 11/ Part 12/ Part 13/ Part 14/ Part 15/ Part 16/ Part 17/ Part 18/ Part 19/ Part 20/ Part 21/ Part 22/Part 23/ Part 24/ Part 25 / Part 26/ Part 27/ Part 28/  Ao3

Only a handful more chapters to go friends!

Obi-Wan prepares to go back to the Jedi Order.

The library in the T.A.R.D.I.S, Obi-Wan decided, was the single most greatest thing in the whole universe.

After his exhausting talk with The Doctor, the Time Lord had taken him to the library and let him loose in the ever expanding, endless room. There were books on everything all sorted and piled up in their own unique way. Obi-Wan found books from when the Jedi Order was first found to books about the make up of the sonic screwdriver and how to make one.

Carrying a pile of books larger than his head, Obi-Wan stumbled over to one of the chairs in the room and sat himself down with a huff and a grin. There was so much to read here in the library and he could not wait to dive into it all. Picking up the book on the sonic screwdriver, Obi-Wan let himself get lost within the wonders of the written word.

He wasn’t sure how long he had been engrossed with the book but when Donna gently patted his shoulder and smiled down at him, Obi-Wan guessed it must have been a few hours.

“Have a good nap, Obi-Wan?” Donna asked, pushing back his hair. Obi-Wan grinned up at her.

“I did, thank you! What about you? The Doctor said you had your own nap.”

The red haired woman nodded. “It was pretty good. There is nothing like a good nap after some excitement. Now, what are you reading?” She asked as she sat down on his arm chair.

Obi-Wan immediately began to talk about the book and how it talked about how the sonic screwdriver was made and where it came from and not once did he feel like Donna was not interested in what he was saying or that she was just humouring him. She asked questions and let him ramble happily.

It was fun, talking to someone about what he had learnt and having his thoughts heard. Normally, only his friends would indulge him when he rambled on about something that had caught his interest but Donna and The Doctor were both happy to hear him talk and really did seem engaged with what he was saying.

“That is a really interesting book, Obi-Wan. But, it is almost time for dinner. We have landed next to a small space diner and are ordering some take out. Come on, put a book mark in that book and let’s get you fed.” Donna grinned, clapping him on his sore shoulders.

Obi-Wan grinned up at the older woman as his stomach growled at the mention of food. He guessed he had been sitting and reading for a while now. “Food sounds great!” He placed a small book mark into the book (though he wasn’t sure where the book mark came from seeing as it was not there before) and stood up from the chair.

“Come on, come on! Let’s go and wrangle The Doctor so we can feed all of us.” Donna laughed, gently herding Obi-Wan out of the library. The thought of food and eating with his two new guardians brought a large smile to Obi-Wan’s face.

He might still be exhausted from everything that had had happened in the last few days but Obi-Wan felt more at peace with himself and the universe around him than he had in years. With The Doctor and Donna here beside him, Obi-Wan was sure that everything was only going to get better from here on out.

Six Months Later

“Are you certain you want to do this Obi-Wan?” The Doctor asked, placing his hands-on Obi-Wan shoulders and looking down into his eyes. “You are welcome here. There is no time limit at all for how long you can or can’t stay.”

Obi-Wan smiled softly up at the man who had become like a father to him in the last six months they had been traveling together. Placing his own hands on top of the older man’s, Obi-Wan shook his head. “I need to go back, Doctor. The Force is calling me and it is time.”

“This is a time machine! You don’t have to go right now!” Donna waved her hand at the large green column behind them. There was a small desperate look on her face, one that had been appearing more and more once Obi-Wan had stated that it was time for him to go back to the Jedi Order. Obi-Wan smiled at her and shook his head sadly.

“I know that I could stay for longer but the Force cannot be ignored.” Obi-Wan looked at the two people who for the last six months had been his closest friends and his guardians. They had protected him, clothed him and fed him without a single thought and they had taken him into their arms and had treated him like family.

He was going to miss them. More than he wanted to admit.

“And besides, it isn’t like you guys can’t visit me at all. You have a T.A.R.D.I.S. You can always find me wherever you are in the universe at whatever time. I will always answer for you.” Obi-Wan pulled back from The Doctor and grasped his hands. “These last six months have been the best of my life, and I would not change them for the universe itself. But it is time for me to go.”

“Oh, Obi-Wan.” The Doctor sighed, shoulders sagging as he pulled Obi-Wan into a tight hug. “I am going to really, really miss you.” The Time Lord whispered into his hair. “You are always welcome back here. Always.”

Obi-Wan held onto the older man tightly, not really wanting to let go and leave the safety and familial love that he had found here in the T.A.R.D.I.S with The Doctor and Donna and whoever else joined them on their adventure of the week. He had seen so many worlds, so many tragedies and joys and so, so many new things and he honestly just wanted to spend the rest of his life here.

Here with the man who loved and cared more than any being in the universe. Who saved countless lives because he could and who always delivered a kind but stern justice to everyone. The Doctor, for the past six months had been there for Obi-Wan. The Time Lord had been his mentor, his father and his friend and had never once judged Obi-Wan or got angry at the endless questions that Obi-Wan had.

And here with Donna, the loud woman with the kindest heart and strongest mind Obi-Wan had ever seen. Donna, who was loud and brass and who always offered a hand of friendship to those around her had been his mother, his best friend and his foundation for the past six months. So many times, he had woken up to nightmares from what they had encountered through their travels but each and every time Donna was there with gentle hands and a soft voice, calming him down from the terrors that plagued his mind.

He did not want to go back to the Temple, not really. There was so much that was just wrong with the Order and how it worked and if he had not travelled with The Doctor and seen the universe outside of the views of the Republic and Order he would never had known it to be so. But the Force was insistent that he returned and since he had spent those several weeks at the Holy City in Jedha with the Guardians, Obi-Wan knew he should not ignore what the Force was telling him.

And there were many wrongs he needed to right within the Order and many things that would need to be done. Like setting the record straight with Bruck Chan and speaking to his Masters and friends whom he had left behind. Throughout his travels with The Doctor and Donna, Obi-Wan had found out some very troubling news about the Jedi and he knew that the information he had obtained needed to be shared with his fellow Jedi before it was too late.

As soon as he pulled away from The Doctor, Donna was there, sweeping him into a crushing and warm hug that left him wanting to cry. Donna was pouring all her love and friendship into the hug and the Force was singing around them with how strongly she felt.  He was going to miss this. Miss Donna and how loudly and purely she felt. He was going to miss the cool, calmness that The Doctor projected whenever he thought that Obi-Wan needed a break and the overwhelming love and friendship that just poured out of the two of them whenever Obi-Wan was around.

It will not be easy to let this go. To leave the comfort and love that came with being in the bright blue box that travelled throughout all of time and space. But Obi-Wan knew that this was not going to be goodbye forever. He would see The Doctor and Donna time and time again throughout his whole life and they would always be watching over him, because they cared and loved him as he loved and cared for them.

Going back will be hard but knowing somewhere out in the stars that The Doctor and Donna were out there, in the endless void in space and time, made him feel like he would never be truly alone again.

[worldcakecakecake]

Feliciano and the King of Hearts

Chosen by the gods as the Queen of Hearts from the moment of birth, we follow Feliciano’s story as he grows into royal life, learns to rule, go against age old customs, and his relationship with his husband to be, the King of Hearts.

Chapter 1 I  Chapter 2 I Chapter 3 I Chapter 4 I Chapter 5 I Chapter 6I Chapter 7 I Chapter 8 I Chapter 9I Chapter 10 I Chapter 11I Chapter 12 I Chapter 13 I Chapter 14 I Chapter 15 I Chapter 16 I Chapter 17 I Chapter 18 I Chapter 19 I Chapter 20 I Chapter 21 I Chapter 22 I Chapter 23 I Chapter 24 I Chapter 25 I Chapter 26 I Chapter 27 I Chapter 28 I Chapter 29 I Chapter 30 I Chapter 31 I Chapter 32 I Chapter 33 I Chapter 34 I Chapter 35 I Chapter 36 I Chapter 37 I chapter 38

                                                    Chapter 39

After those three days, no more islands were spotted, but a meet of large land, their first entrance into the main shores of the Spade Kingdom, more precisely, the Indian province. It was dense jungle, blues, greens and no village, town or city to welcome them. It was rather fearful for both Ludwig and Feliciano, who throughout the days they had spent in the Oralee were used to meeting abundance of people and life no matter where they stopped. It must have been the same the rest felt, for eeriness settled between them, slowing their strokes as they all gazed to the desolation, trying to find a place to make the dock they had been promised.

 In the distance they began to hear a shout, a calling, all keeping their eyes attentive to this, until finally, they spotted, at the very end of the bay, a single cabin house, a small little thing that surely held but one room. At its side stood a man, waving vigorously, anything to try and grab the attention of the coming group. They answered to it and they all began a hastened rowing, until finally their canoes met the sand of this land and they could all come down and let their feet touch this very small beach. They all came forward to this man, who bowed and offered a letter for the arising King and Queen of Hearts. Ludwig quickly ripped it apart and began reading, one from the organizers at the Spadian castle concerning how they were going to be dealing with their route from there to Washington.

 “This cabin is small, but I will do what I can to make it comfortable to the Oralee guides until you are ready to leave tomorrow,” the man suggested, offering the door for them to come in as they pleased.

 “For us only?” Sefina questioned.

 “What about Ludwig and Feliciano?” Nadia wondered.

 “We already have to go ahead,” Ludwig affirmed, “half an hour walk from here a carriage with horses is already waiting, and we can’t stall, were already late as it is.”

 They all saddened, for it meant that they had to wish goodbye. Feliciano, as emotional as he was, took his turn thanking each one, embracing and kissing them as if they were long life friends. Ludwig instead took supplies the man had already prepared for them, ordering their luggage into bags that had been sent, having to leave the trunks and baskets. Ludwig wrapped the scepter in a special cloak, well hidden at the bottom of one of his bags. By the time he gave Feliciano his own to carry, he was done with his farewells, Ludwig giving his own with simple words and a strong bow.

 “Good luck,” Michelle wished them.

 “Don’t forget about us!” Rosangeliz waved.

 “May the Aces bless the rest of your journey,” Carlos hoped.

 Ludwig and Feliciano began this new trek on land, Feliciano constantly looking back to wave at them, to hear their shouts of promise, all until the hill they were going downward on blocked any other gaze between them. It was once again only Ludwig, Feliciano and Pookie, who was now on Feliciano’s shoulder, watching well around him, especially between the trees for any kind of danger. Feliciano made sure to always stay directly on Ludwig’s side, the jungle seemed even denser here, lonely, loud shrilling noises of different animals causing quite a haunting feeling. Feliciano ended up taking Ludwig’s arm as a sort of comfort, to cease any fear, any trembling, Ludwig was here, Ludwig was here, he kept repeating to himself.

 In the late afternoon they came upon a small little house with a quaint little family just like the Blanc in Diamonds who gave them a carriage with horses. It was not the eloquence of the past coaches they had borrowed in their journey, with it being mostly cringing wood, some hay with blankets as beds, but it was large and spacious enough and two good horses to bring it along. The letter had specified that they were meant to travel what was left of that day, the whole night, even the next day, until they arrived to Bilaspur, where it said they would meet with a Neeraja Patel who was in charge of organizing their journey through the rest of the Indian province and even the Chinese province until they got to America. All they did in the next of their trajectory in the wagon was sleep, Feliciano would try to sketch, which was almost impossible in this bumpy road or he would actually strike up a chat with Ludwig. He loved how they were more open to talk like this now, about things such as what jackets they found the most annoying, how their own dancing lessons had gone and even how much they missed their mothers. Sure, they hadn’t gone close to romantic heights, but this growing friendship, of conversations where they filled in those missed years was just enough for Feliciano, and more and more he was really starting to enjoy Ludwig’s presence.

 On the day they arrived to Bilaspur, the guards that watched over the gates to the hilltop village stopped them. They knew who they were and even the meaning to their presence, but the path to this man was to be done by foot, through a singular path that lead up to the very top, where a magnificent palace lay, shimmering in colors to delight, halting them both to the spot as they admired its richness along with the ones of the rest of the buildings that showered down, that introduced the village. All kinds of shades of blues, of silvers, jewels, arches, peeks, Spade symbols decorating every building, even the very people that peeked through the doors and windows to witness these new arriving guests. As Ludwig and Feliciano climbed, they got quite the crowd, following them, their eyes wondered, like they were the true jewels in this village, ignorant to all the richness they were already surrounded with. Ludwig kept Feliciano close, for it started to become rather odd, the kind of attention they were getting was almost like worshipping, unlike anything they had met with crowds such as this. They all knew why they were here and thus they followed them to meet him, children pointing and guiding, with excited laughs and skips that Feliciano was tempted to join, but Ludwig still maintained his strong hold that wouldn’t dare let him go too far.

 The palace came closer and closer, more for them to take details in the decorated marbles, to each little intricate design, tall arches, imperial domes, expanded windows and doors, an entrance gate to match its high refinery. It was desolate, no one was there to welcome them as they hoped, not even guards, just the rest of the villagers behind them, waiting alongside them.

 Suddenly, not from the gate, but from the sides of the palace, a young girl rushed forward with guards following behind her, out of breath, weak, hunching and close to falling exhausted on the floor, but her dark heavy eyes on them refused to let her so. She straightened, she presented, as elegant as her prestigious sari, lahanga and choli, but her gaze remained just as awed, silence continuing on between them for she was nervous at what kind of words she should use for the presence before her. She had to hasten, it was rather rude to leave them there with no kind of greeting or words.

 “You both don’t understand the honor that we all feel to have you here in the village, we will all do what we can to give you the stay you both deserve.” She was still nervous, a lost look in her eye, clear to them that her mind was pensive on something else that was not really before her.

 “The honor should be ours, thank you for accepting our stay here,” Ludwig told.

 “The village and the people are absolutely beautiful, and the palace, breathtaking, any kind of stay here would be perfect, thank you,” he bowed and gave his usual charming smile, that caused the girl to grin largely in return, her ease coming, her nervousness slowly leaving.

 “As kind as-” she had to cut herself before she continued, she was given clear instructions to not mention this.

 “I really don’t mean to be rushing, but we were told to meet with a man named Neeraja Patel,” Ludwig wondered.

 “Oh yes, I’m his younger sister, Priya Patel. I was sent to bring you inside, come along.” She signaled the guards and they in turn signaled others in the palace, thus the gates were opened for their entrance. She readily headed inside, looking back to them, giving them the assurance to come and for her to lead them as she should. They instantly did, leaving the crowds, Feliciano giving them a wave before he focused on keeping a tight hold of his bags as they went along.

 More secluded, more calm, as if they stood away from the village. More richness was presented to them, all walls, all floors, each corner, decorated extravagantly, a new thing to spot with every gaze. Their eyes were so focused around them, on the mirrors, on the vases, desks, tapestries, that Priya had to keep constant looks to make sure they were still following her.

 They handed their bags to some servants along the way, who brought them to their already assigned room, before climbing up, surely to the tallest part until they stopped before a large salon, as richly decorated as the rest, all kinds of pillows and blankets around the floors, along with plants and…were those winged blue tigers and…a peacock?

 “Ah, you have finally arrived,” one man greeted aloud, spreading his arm and making his presence, although small, large enough to resonate across the whole area, seeming to pour out of the very large windows. He stood from his place, at the very center against the wall, covered by a rich jeweled veil and the most comfortable pillows at his vicinity.

 “I am Neeraja Patel, I assume everything has gone well with your trip and arrival. You two must be hungry, join me for dinner, my servants have already prepared a table.” He ushered them down until they arrived to a separate room with a very large table flooded with all kinds of foods native to the province. Both Ludwig and Feliciano were overwhelmed, the food seemed to pile, and surely no matter what they did, they wouldn’t be able to take from everything, even if the scent was amazing and they were indeed eager to try what they could.

 They sat, finding space next to each other, already plates presented for them to pick and serve, along with rich glasses of Mango Lassi, which Feliciano loved and even asked for more as they dined. Priya then sat and ate as well, joining in what Ludwig thought was rather frivolous conversations of this palace’s history, Feliciano asking about all kinds of architectural details, even how this placed worked with weathers. As Ludwig gazed around, hoping for a moment to ask, his eyes landed on Priya as he noticed something rather peculiar. She was stilled in a trance, her eyes lost in a definite looking, a direction that was in Feliciano’s sitting, her arms trembling as she was trying to reach to serve herself from the carrot and lentil soup. He was about to point this out and ask, but it was just as Feliciano noticed as well.

 “Priya, are you alright?” He asked with real concern, enough to break her travel, for her to look around and ground herself once more, flushing in embarrassment.

 In fear she kept her eyes to the table, beginning to pick up some plates. “Ye-yes, I am alright, thank you for your concern, but will you excuse me to the kitchen Neeraja, I’ll help the servants with cleaning,”

 “Priya, you don’t have to-”

 “I will!” Once she had the empty plates, she left, without a glance, without a care, like she had never been in the table in the first place.

 “Is she…really going to be okay sir,” Feliciano asked.

 Neeraja remained silent, focusing mostly on his drink, hesitant to say this, but surely Ludwig and Feliciano, from the moment they entered this village, must have noticed, must have been filled with questions that he knew it was best he answered that moment.

 “Did you ever hear of Bilaspur?” He asked curiously.

 “We have to say no, we never did until we came here,” Feliciano answered honestly.

 Neeraja didn’t seem insulted or maddened, just understanding, placing his drink on the table, not interested in the food any longer.

 “After all, you’re not native Spadians, it’s to be expected, but to be honest, I’m surprised the crown gave me the privilege of organizing your route, even letting you into this village, but Queen Arthur’s family has known mine for long, I even worked some time in Washington, I suppose he rather trust the Heartian royals with someone he himself trusted,” he smiled.

 “That’s very nice, but why would there be doubt in coming here? This place is beautiful and everyone is so sweet,”

 “Well…except…” Ludwig wanted to comment, but he didn’t know if he would be trespassing something sensitive.

 “Yes?” Neeraja truly wanted to hear.

 “The kind of…attention we get here, it’s…nothing like we’ve ever seen, people act…so strangely around us, like…they’re worshipping, yet everyone’s eyes seem so lost and perhaps even possessed…just  like…” Ludwig gazed over to where Priya had been sitting, clearly mentioning what just happened to her, because it was the same he basically got from the rest of the village.

 Neeraja managed to smile, taking from his drink, readying himself to tell. “This village is cursed, some of the lingering effects after the war of the blackened decades, we fear we might never be relieved of it no matter the studies I did back in the Washington castle. We’ve managed though, got us even a reputation,” he chuckled.

 “What kind of reputation?” Feliciano wondered.

 “Psychics, fortune tellers, oracles, whatever you want to name it when people know the destinies and futures of every people they meet and of the lands of the four kingdoms.”

 Ludwig and Feliciano silenced, in deep bewilderment for Neeraja to be able to continue. “This village is full of them, each in different ways to foretell. Some can only see the bad, others the good, some can only see things that have to do with family, others with love or with journeys, some with teachings, hatred or even sacrifices. It’s not complete though, people in this village don’t get visions, just senses and feelings that they try to interpret to the best they can. My sister…” he faltered for a moment, worrying and wondering about her, hoping he could do something to help, to even rid this. “Is what we call a sabhee drashta, an all seer, she’s one of the only ones in the whole village who actually gets full visions, sees it as clearly as if it was a painting. That trance you saw her in, just another of her strong visions, been more vibrant since I told her you two were coming here.”

 Ludwig and Feliciano looked to each other with question, wondering how they played into it to cause this.

 “What about you? Do you have any of these visions?” Ludwig instead asked.  

 “I’m a rare case, I too was also a sabhee drashta, but while I was in Washington I met with other priest as well as the Jack, they taught me a way I can better control it. I’ve learned to hold them and practically submerged them until I see nothing…some things are just better off not knowing.” He turned solemn, eyes lost to memories of visions and how they had affected in his lifetime, things he rather not remember, distracting himself in tapings against the glass he was drinking from.

 “Have you given your sister the same teachings?” Feliciano asked.

 “She’s in the process, but it’s not an easy one, but after she gets the hang of it, we’ll start offering classes for the village to help.” He hoped dearly for that.

 “And…” Feliciano was doubtful to mention, but after those looks he got and after realizing what it was, he wanted to know, he wanted a peek, “what did they see about us to…get like that?” He paused, trying to ease his figure to not show his small desperation and his deepest curiosity for what Neeraja would be willing to say, revealing great paths of their future that Feliciano would be fine if even a hint was told. Maybe it could reveal something big, get them to prepare, maybe even understand his relationship with Ludwig more.

 Neeraja didn’t give an expression to know, he turned away, focusing on his drink for now. “I don’t know, I haven’t asked them so they haven’t told me, everyone who knows me knows that I really dislike talking about this…but, I do admit, whatever it was…must have been something grand, something that would truly bring this reaction for when the moment comes to all the four kingdoms.” He tried to imagine, just as Ludwig and Feliciano did, not understanding how they, two mere arising rulers, one with an early power activation, another with two much power to control also tied with a lot of mystery, with a lot of teachings still to be taught, as well as a delayed coronation because Feliciano had refused a promised marriage to the Aces, could one day do something to bring an entire village of future seers into silence, into worship, into ultimate thanks and the most loyal attention and servitude.

 No more words were given to the matter; Neeraja motioned them to follow him to his map room, where he would show them their official route to Washington.

 The rest of the trip was meant to be done in a carriage ride, one they would start tomorrow, riding from Bilaspur until they reached Hong-Kong in the Chinese province, where they would switch carriages and meet a group who will accompany them. There was only one stop in Shanghai for supplying and preparing, because from there on they would walk into the American province, until they arrived to the very walls that surrounded Washington, Neeraja explaining that it was built many centuries ago as protection for the big city after the war of the blackened decades. Once there, the guards will surely lead them to the Spadian castle. As it had been with Ludwig and Feliciano’s peculiar journey, it was away from common routes, secretive and surely no large cities to attract the attention of any wandering Khaos’s men. Ludwig approved of it and as soon as they both understood well, Neeraja lead them to their room, a big one that was just the size of theirs back in Berlin. It had a large open balcony door with only but a dense curtain to cover it, letting in the most comfortable breeze. Once they were alone, Ludwig and Feliciano decided to spend their time by the balcony, studying this village and its wondrous architecture, even the beauty of the jungle it was surrounded with. They remained silent, occupying their attention to the wind, to the colors their vision took and just ultimate peace. They were already dressed in their sleeping robes, their luggage prepared for their exit the next day, they could sleep out here if they wanted, but it was still an active night that would surely keep them awake if they dared to. Ludwig would break from this view from time to time to gaze over to Feliciano, who was still, his expression pensive, no other movement from him, not on a sketchbook, even as Pookie nuzzled expecting his attention.

 “You’re thinking about these people’s visions,” Ludwig quickly identified.

 Feliciano laid his face on the rail of the balcony, letting his breaths being the only thing to cause in him movement. “Why wouldn’t I? It’s quite unsettling to know that this very village I’m looking down on knows how the rest of my life will go, everything that vexes and will continue to as I live on…I kind of wished they would tell us something…I really wish I knew more,”

 “Why would you? It’s as Neeraja said, some things are just not worth seeing or knowing,” Ludwig said with the same expression as Neeraja had told them, in his own solemnity.

 “Then…for those things that are not worth seeing, maybe they could tell us how to avoid them, how to stop them, get us prepared and just…make some things clearer.” Feliciano sometimes wished it could be that easy, without all this dilemma, questioning and uncertainty.

 “It’s destiny Feliciano, I believe that no matter what we do…there’s no exact way to stop what is awaiting us, if we would know all these things we would just be anxious and always fretting on how we could stop it, but fate has its way of always conceding what was meant. Maybe it’s just best we leave it a surprise, a wondering we can find on our own, with different things to look forward to. Our answers will arrive in their time.”

 For minutes on they remained in silence, in the rushing wind, in the tiredness that slowly began to reign on them.

 “You’re…right,” Feliciano had to admit. “Thank you Ludwig, I should really just calm my mind about this, and like you always say-” he suddenly sat up, pulling his hair back, deepening his voice and trying to look as serious as possible, “-we only have to be focusing on the journey! Get those orbs of Validity and stop fooling around Feliciano!”

 Ludwig laughed, rolling his eyes. “Stop, this is a disgrace to me,” he joked, departing himself from the edge, letting himself stare to the giggles and laughter that then came from Feliciano, so lively and beautiful, oh he could just- he shook the thought from his head quick. “Come on, let’s go to sleep.” Feliciano had to agree, he was really starting to become tired and those beds looked extremely comfortable.

  The next morning, Neeraja gave them an excellent breakfast and afterwards they were to meet at the gates of the palace, where already a new rich carriage was awaiting them. It was to be pulled by four horses, all with strength and speed to get them on time to their next goal. Neeraja wished them farewell and luck, offering a basket of food to cook for their next meal courses. They both took it gladly, they had eaten amazingly here. Priya was there to wish her own farewells, bowing and smiling just as her brother, hoping for the best…even if she knew already what will happen.

 She suddenly remembered, just as Feliciano was taking the first step inside the coach.

 “Your highness, wait,” she rushed forward, as close as possible, keeping them both near, looking around herself to make sure no other could peek into her words. She met with her brother’s distaste about this, but she quickly glared back, it was only a couple of things, nothing large for him and the rest of their servants to worry. “You must have heard by now about this village’s peculiarity and my special case. I cannot simply word out everything that will happen, but I can warn and prepare you with these words.”

 She had their attention, they stopped, gazing to her with quite the eagerness. “Do what you can to strengthen your magic, both by yourself and together. Really start to take it seriously, schedule time for each and every day, at least an hour, but if you weren’t so busy I would even suggest two. Ludwig, I know you have a book that was given to your grandfather about this, do every spell, every trick, every information while you’re on the journey, and once you return to Berlin, get new books, create new things, never stop testing the limits your power can make…there’s more to it than you both think you know.” It was her first warning, coated with worry and desperation, a plead enough to tell them that something large depended on it. They both nodded, with promise and seriousness.

 “Ludwig…” she really wanted to say more, but her time was limited and she couldn’t reveal much more, not when Feliciano was there, not when she knew his resolve and what he was hiding from him. “Be weary, your plans might not come out as you hope. I would advise…you listen to Feliciano and really trust him…his emotions for you are strong, stronger than what you wanted to avoid…understand you’re not alone, he will always be by your side, always. Remember that your bond is the strengthening that will one day save…” she hesitated, deciding on stopping, she had said enough, now she just hoped he could really understand, even as he lay frozen wondering if she really knew all the depths he was going through and what that meant for their future. He nodded, a quick thanks, the true appreciation seen in the calm of his blue eyes and even figure.

 “And Feliciano…” she smiled, with no dread, with shinning eyes of hope and feast, “my brother and I will always be honored to attend anything.” She curtsied, but Feliciano didn’t understand for what, he just nodded and agreed, with his own smile, coming down from the steps of his coach to embrace her, thankful to the words she gave them that were more a blessing than she could think. As for her last words, he would realize sooner or later and they will be clear for that moment. With her joy as she said it, it surely meant nothing evil or haunting.

 They departed with friendly waves, now nothing to interrupt their boarding, Ludwig closing the door in finality. They were off, to other new terrains, new provinces and with magic to practice, a resolve they committed to as soon as Ludwig took out the book.

[spratwurst]

I want to know your answers to all of them, but for the sake of not being obnoxious, 1-10.

There is literally nothing more obnoxious than me actually answering all of these, but it was fun, so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Thank you for enabling the trash! ♥ 

1. Race?

Is spirit an option? If not, then Avvar human would be great.

2. Class/Specialization?

Rift mage, surely.

3. Your homeland?

The Frostback Mountains.

4. Your family?

I imagine my father would be a fisherman, my mother seamstress and/or baker, and my brother blacksmith. Just normal people doing normal things in an Avvar hold.

5. Who were you before?

Apprentice to the hold’s Augur, aspiring to take their place one day, using my magic for healing both the people and animals, occasionally gathering herbs, and secretly working on an exhaustive index of Avvar lore. Secretly because the Avvar are practical people, and such deeds that offer nothing back in short-term would be frowned upon, but I don’t see why that would stop me.

6. Would you be religious?

In the Avvar way, absolutely. I would love and respect the spirits.

7. Do you have a mabari?

Not initially, but I’m convinced that as soon as I’d come to the lowlands and see a mabari, I’d send at least ten of them back home. The Avvar would love them, and decide every single one of them deserves to be honorary hold-beast.

8. Your opinion on other races?

The Chantry as a whole and the Orlesian nobles would become the butt of every joke once I get back home, that’s for sure. I’d probably see a certain kinship in some of the Dalish clans, with their disdain for lowlander humans, secluded and nomadic way of living, and respect for animals and nature. Other than that, my only default opinion would be that lowlanders are fucking weird, regardless of race.

9. What would Varric’s nickname for you be?

Sooner or later my mage training would be brought up, and I’d be like “yeah I was possessed by a spirit for like 6 months. It taught me everything I know about magic and it was the best time I’ve ever had.” Pretty much everyone would freak out, Varric would be terribly amused, and that’s how I’d earn my nickname from him. I have no idea what exactly it would be though.

10. What would your tarot card look like?

Something green and earthy, with the shape of mountains in the background, and some sort of overlay on my figure to represent the friendly spirit possession. Nothing too complex or dramatic.

The remaining answers below because this post is way too long.

11. Where would you hang out in Skyhold?

The library, the garden, the tavern, and just outside the fortress itself, enjoying the wind and cold and snow.

12. What would you do for fun?

Search all books I can get my hands on for any mention of the Avvar tribes, and possibly mutter “we don’t fucking do that” every now and then. Talk about spirits and magic and the Fade with Solas and Cole. Work on my writing/lore-keeping skills with Varric, and hopefully resist the temptation to add more tragic deaths than actually happened. Hang out on roofs with Sera and throw things at people when life gets too much.

13. What armor would you wear?

The Stone-Bear armor. Or anything with leather and fur that’s practical and comfortable to wear.

14. What would your room look like?

Much like in real life, having to move around a lot doesn’t make me get rid of useless things so that the moving is easier. It makes me want to keep more of them. So it’d be simple and comfortable, with hardly any decorations, but lots of warm rugs, books, and random useless objects. Homey. 

15. Who would be your friends at Skyhold?

I’d tried to be on friendly terms with everyone, despite disagreeing with many of the things they say, think, and do. Since we’re stuck with one another, we might as well make it as enjoyable as possible and learn something in the process.

16. Would you have any friends outside of the Inquisition?

…the spirits?

17. Who wouldn’t you get along with?

Again, I’d try to get along with everyone, even though I wouldn’t agree with Vivienne’s or Sera’s views on magic and mages, for example. Those are just aspects of who they are, not what defines them. I’d still happily be their friend, if they’d have me.

18. Who would you romance?

Scout Lace Harding won my heart. Unless I were an elf, in which case I’d choose the pain and suffering of romancing Solas.

19. Would you do pranks with Sera?

Absolutely.

20. Would you sleep with the Iron Bull (casually if not romance)?

Casually sleep with him, probably not. Casually engage in non-sexual bondage sessions (given that he’s comfortable with that as well), yes. Sometimes you just gotta unwind.

21. Would you keep Cole around?

Of course! I love him and I’d trust him with my life.

22. Can you play the game (politics)?

In a tongue-in-cheek way, observing how the Orlesian nobles act, and exaggerating their behavior and manner of speaking. Both for fun and to get stuff done.

23. What would be on your tombstone in the fade (What are you afraid of)?

Helplessness, powerlessness, incapacity, something among those lines.

24. Who would you recruit to seal the breach?

The mages. As an Avvar mage, I wouldn’t trust the Templars, and wouldn’t want them to angrily wave their swords at the sky until they intimidate the breach into sealing itself.

25. Opinion on Mages versus Templars?

I don’t have an uncomplicated answer to this. In short, it all boils down to the feeling of entitlement the Chantry has over everyone’s lives. The Circle would work if the mages had a choice. As it is now, it’s all too easy for abuse of power to slip in; i’s all too easy for Templars to forget mages are people worthy of respect and equal treatment; it’s all too easy for mages to see the Templar as nothing more than inhuman butchers. Nobody wins from this arrangement, and I believe the only solution is rebuilding the Circle and the Templar and Seeker orders from the ground up, with equality in mind and none of that “magic must serve man” bullshit interpretation.

26. Who would be put in charge of Orlais and why?

I’d ask Celene, Briala, and Gaspard to resolve their dispute the rational way... by organizing a race to see who can climb the Winter Palace and get on top first. Also Celene and Gaspard would have stones strapped to their backs. Just because. Then Liliana a panicked Josephine would tell me I can’t just ask the Empress to climb a building.

27. Would you sacrifice the Chargers?

No way. No fucking way I would.

28. Would you go after Blackwall?

Go after him as in bring him back on board with the Inquisition? Yes. I would rather he tried to be the best person he could possibly be and put his abilities to good use than rot in a prison cell, sad, alone, and dwelling on the past.

29. Would you drink from the well?

I would be curious, and I would consider it, but ultimately I’d let Morrigan do it because she has the knowledge, ability, and experience to handle it better than I could.

30. Where would you go if the Inquisition was disbanded?

Back home, wherever that would be at the time. But I’d also become a Red Jenny, and spend time with Sera and the others.

31. How do you react to the egg telling you he is an elven god?

I’d be excited about the implications and ask a ton of questions about the Fade, the Veil, spirits, and magic. Then of course I’d tell him he’s being unreasonable, and try to change his mind.

[mirrerover]

you procrastinate packing, I procrastinate studying for that super hard and important maths exam next week. upps. anyway. is fic talk okay?? cause like. young single parent!Tae with young neighbour Jungkook who falls in love with him, but has to overcome his commitment-issues bc a child is involved and has to prove that he's serious about this has been on my mind lately. idk.

Of course, fic talk is okay! Rumorhas it I once wrote a fic or two. Once upon a time before this long unexplainedhiatus because I’m lazy. Hmmm, maybe not that unexplained then.

Young single parent!Taehyung. Thatjust tugs at my heart strings. He loves kids so much and his imagination isendless, so I think he would be the kind of dad to take his kid on all kinds ofawesome adventures. From camping in a real tent in the living room to pickinghis kid up from school in a full superhero costume. Taehyung would be thecoolest dad at that entire freaking school.

Taehyung calls Taeguk (yes, you’rereading this right. this is canon, don’t fight me on this) the best surprise ofhis life. Her mother is a girl Taehyung went to college with who was alwaysmore of a casual acquaintance than a girlfriend and who wasn’t ready for thecommitment that being a mother means. But Taehyung, Taehyung had always wantedto be a Dad and that’s how he ends up living in a small but cozy apartment withhis daughter, while the mother is in the US chasing her dreams and ambitions (becausethat’s where the people in k-drama land go when we want them out of the picture).

And Jeongguk, well…

As Jeongguk stares in Taeguk’s darkeyes —Taehyung’s eyes—, he realizes he hasn’t tried this hard to impress agirl since before he realized he was gay. And even back then he never seemedto sweat this much.

“Hey Jeongguk.” Taehyung soundstired. He hikes Taeguk a little higher on his hip, her little body listlesslyrolling along with the motion before she buries her head back in Taehyung’s chest,one hooded eye still peering in Jeongguk’s direction.

Taehyung tilts his chin to the sidewhen Jeongguk takes too long to respond, probably wondering what Jeongguk isdoing awkwardly standing in front of his apartment door but too polite toexcuse himself and go inside despite the fatigue etched in both his and hisdaughter’s face.

He’s obviously exhausted, standingunder the harsh fluorescent lighting of their building’s hallway that doesn’tdo anyone any favours, and Jeongguk still thinks he’s the best thing he’s seenall day.

It scares Jeongguk. It scares him becausethe feeling to get closer to Taehyung didn’t disappear when he found out Taegukisn’t Taehyung’s younger sister, or cousin, or the girl he perhaps babysitstwice a week. Taehyung has a daughter. An actual child who he is responsiblefor 24/7, all days of the year, at least 18 years in total, but it’s probablymore of a life sentence if he takes his mother’s word for it. And anyone Taehyungwould date would come second, would in the best-case scenario be convicted tolife in parenthood as well. And Jeongguk would be lying if he says that doesn’tscare him shitless.

But somehow, he ended up on the Kim’sdoorstep anyway. Being a nuisance if Taeguk’s darkening expression is anythingto go by.

“You said you guys had to go forvaccinations today.” At that remark Taeguk’s face grows completely dim before she resolutelyturns it the other way. Jeongguk winces. Rejection never stung sobad.

“That’s right.” Taehyung is kindenough to send him a weak smile, but the crease between his eyebrows makesJeongguk think it had been far from a pleasant experience and neither of themlikes to be reminded of it. “We did, didn’t we, Gukkie? Got our body ready forour next adventures.”

Taeguk doesn’t dignify her fatherwith a response, doesn’t do anything but curl closer to Taehyung.  

“Vaccinations suck,” Jeongguk blurts,ears growing red when Taehyung lifts an eyebrow at him. Language. Jeonggukkeeps forgetting. “But I’m sure,” Jeongguk stammers on, scared he’ll losecourage and give up if he stops now, “you were very brave.”

Taeguk remains impassive but Taehyungsmiles at that. A real smile without any of the lines between his eyes thatwere present before. “That’s right,” Taehyung agrees warmly, pressing a comfortingkiss to the crown of his daughter’s hair. “Very brave.”

“And when I used to be brave,’Jeongguk says, pulling his hands from behind his back, “I got to have anotherfriend.”

Jeongguk awkwardly pushes the stuffedtoy in Taeguk’s direction, desperately hoping his sweaty palms didn’t leave any strange stains.

One eye peeks curiously at the giftbefore Taeguk’s body, which had been limp in her father’s arm during the entireconversation, straightens up abruptly with interest. Her hand makes an abortedgrabbing motion before she seems to think the better of it. Taeguk shoots a questioning look up ather father.

“I think that’s for you,” Taehyungtells her, “so what do we say to Jeongguk?”

“What’s her name?”

Jeongguk watches Taehyung bite theinside of his cheek in an obvious attempt not to laugh. “Before that, Gukkie.” Taehyunggently jostles her body to get her attention away from the toy and on hermanners. “What do we say before that.”

“Thank you,” Taeguk says, almosttripping over the words as she leans forward to accept the animal, followed bya, ‘is her name Mister Rabbit?”

Jeongguk glances down at the toy,soft cotton stretched tight over the obvious shape of a bear. Then he looks back at Taehyung whose face is suspiciously blank.

“Sure,” Jeongguk agrees weakly. “OrMiss Rabbit.”

Taeguk purses her lip, studying the stuffedbear with keen attention. Then she nods her little head like Jeongguk’ssuggestion has merit. “Uncle Yoongi has a cat. She’s called dog. She’s veryfluffy.”

Jeongguk breathes a small sigh ofrelief, happy he avoided the mistake of going into a rabbit versus beardiscussion with a four-year-old. Happy that Taehyung, although still exhausted,now looks a little bit happier too.

Taehyung hums, skilfully unlockingthe door despite holding a child and a stuffed toy half the child’s size. “Veryfluffy. Fluffy enough to wear as a scarf in winter.”

“Noooo,”Taeguk protest with a giggle. “Cats don’t like that.”

“What?” Taehyungs gasps, turning wideeyes on both Taeguk and Jeongguk. “But why did Yoongi get such a fluffy cat ifhe can’t wear her as a scarf?”

“I don’t know, Daddy.”

“That’s so silly,” Taehyung muttersas he toes out of his shoes while standing in the doorway.

“Daddy’s silly,” Taeguk counterswhile Taehyung slips her sparkly ballet shoes off and puts them on the rackbeside the door.

Taehyung kisses her nose. “Silly foryou.”

There’s an ease to the way Taehyunginteracts with this tiny human, this little person that looks so much likehimself, that baffles Jeongguk. He wonders if it come with fatherhood or if it’ssomething distinctly Taehyung. Wonders if he’ll ever get the chance to findout.

“I’m going to put Taeguk and MissRabbit to bed,” Taehyung says, front door still pushed open with his back.

Jeongguk nods, starting to shufflebackwards on his feet. “Yeah, of course, I’ll just—”

“Would you like to come in? Have acup of coffee?”

There are so many things that flit throughJeongguk’s mind when he thinks of Taehyung. How strong he looks tirelesslyholding his daughter up in his arms. How scary it must be to be a parent thisyoung. If Taehyung would even be interested in relationships when he has a child and work to juggle.How likely the chance is that he’d be interested in men when the presence of achild clearly suggests otherwise.

But somehow, he ends up steppingacross the Kim’s threshold anyway. Not being entirely unwelcome, if Taeguk’scurious gaze is anything to go by.

Now everyone go study for their exams! You can be lazy when you have graduated like me. ;)

[addictionfreedom]

Crack Addict Behavior

Contents

Popular drugs amongst substance

Who live and frequently drive

Mothers. childhood friends

New zealand has pennsylvania that

Crack cocaine rehab

Behavior e.g. compulsive

Prenatal cocaine exposure (PCE), theorized in the 1970s, occurs when a pregnant woman uses cocaine and thereby exposes her fetus to the drug. "Crack baby" was a term coined to describe children who were exposed to crack ( freebase cocaine in smokable form) as fetuses; the concept of the crack baby emerged in the …

This study describes binge use of crack cocaine, binge users, and their sexual risk behaviors in a sample of 303 African-American, HIV-positive users.

Witnessing crack addict behavior? Learn the warning signs of crack cocaine. Cocaine is a potent, addictive stimulant drug with a high potential for abuse and addiction.

Source. Crack is a form of cocaine and is one of the most popular drugs amongst substance abusers, with an estimated six million people in the United States admitting to using it. There are both physical and behavioral signs that can indicate abuse.

The man was fresh out of prison and addicted to crack cocaine. His erratic behavior sparked Mayfield’s curiosity … sure the doctors had discovered her crack addiction. The office had tested her blood, but cocaine was not the reason for …

The 5 Most Common Behavior Traits of an Addict. The behavior of an addicted person is baffling, frustrating, frightening and sad. The power of addictive substances is so strong that many people are overwhelmed by it.

The results of abusing crack cocaine are so severe that only the most powerful addiction would keep a person using this drug.

Commentators often contrast today’s treatment of the opioid crisis as a public health epidemic with the punitive approach once taken toward crack cocaine addiction …

The drastic seesawing between unstoppable energy and exhaustion has obvious impacts on day-to-day behavior. Crack cocaine renders regular sleep habits all but impossible, in turn throwing off regular attendance at school, work attendance , and other obligations. The superhuman stimulation and unfathomable fatigue …

Learn about cocaine addiction causes, withdrawals, … Crack cocaine, … Cocaine acts in the deep areas of the brain that reward us for "good behavior" …

Marijuana could be used to treat people suffering from addictions to crack cocaine, according to a new study … The …

Feb 16, 2017 … Witnessing crack addict behavior? Learn the warning signs of crack cocaine. Cocaine is a potent, addictive stimulant drug with a high potential for abuse and addiction. It blocks the reuptake of the neurotransmitters serotonin, norepinephrine and serotonin in the brain, and creates feelings of euphoria and …

Houston is now one of 10 cities with a controversial program to offer $200 to crack … money to addicts which could be used to buy drugs. The group has also been accused of racism. "We’re not targeting the race; we’re targeting the …

Addiction, by contrast, involves repeated, difficult-to-restrain behavior intended …

Do you know the signs of crack use in men? Find out if your friend or loved one needs rehab. Visit https://ift.tt/1DrENnX

Suboxone Treatment Beckley Wv Contents Services. null. x-rays. our walk Article gives information Beckley comprehensive treatment center provides methadone Virginia for detox from opioid High crime rate 304-256-0200 – 3 convenient locations. Personalized treatment plans. Experienced and compassionate counselors. Counseling. Alcohol and drug abuse. A Beckley psychiatrist is set … comprehensive drug treatment program into southern West Virginia —

The symptoms of crack addiction can be seen in how a person behaves, as well as how they think and how they look.

Mar 8, 2018 … When someone is addicted to crack, they're likely to engage in illegal or dangerous activities to keep getting the drug. This could include illegal activities such as stealing, violence or dangerous sexual behaviors. People who are addicted to crack will stop paying attention to their responsibilities, including …

Check out Crack addict on Downloadsearch

There are many reasons why crack addicts always lie, including to get more drugs, get out of trouble, avoid jail time, and avoid facing their addiction. … else is doing it' or 'I just used it once,' are very common. Most people who do not want to believe that they are an addict will lie about their behavior while they are on drugs.

Top 20 Crack Addiction Symptoms … symptoms or single test that clearly indicates that someone has crack addiction, … changes in behavior e.g …

Those of us who live and frequently drive in Chicago see many unseemly things on a daily basis, but this past Saturday evening, I was unwillingly treated to the sight of a crack addict showing … to encourage this sort of behavior. I am a …

Remember that lesson you learned early in life? A funny thing happened on the way to introducing naloxone to the world of drug addicts. Experts in the field decided this antidote to nearly fatal drug overdoses was a modern-day miracle that …

Crack addiction is a dangerous and often deadly disease. You need help to break the cycle of crack addiction before it is too late for you find help right here.

Feb 5, 2018 … People who are using crack usually exhibit overconfidence and hyperactivity. Other signs of crack abuse to look for include: Frequent disappearances (to get high); Dilated pupils; Aggressive behavior; Restlessness; Increased breathing rate; Uncharacteristic irresponsibility; Cracked or blistered lips from …

Why is Crack Cocaine So Highly Addictive? … effects of crack cocaine? Crack causes a … and paranoid behavior. As crack cocaine interferes with the …

Dual Diagnosis Treatment Centers Phoenix Contents Dual diagnosis rehab for dual For detox from Health treatment programs … the chandler Long-term programs contents dual diagnosis treatment Find Dual Diagnosis Treatment Centers in Scottsdale, Maricopa County, Arizona, get help from Scottsdale dual diagnosis rehab for dual Diagnosis Treatment in Scottsdale, get help with … She attained her Doctorate In Psychology at

Sep 16, 2013 … Long before he brought people into his laboratory at Columbia University to smoke crack cocaine, Carl Hart saw its effects firsthand. Growing up in poverty, he watched relatives become crack addicts, living in squalor and stealing from their mothers. childhood friends ended up in prisons and morgues.

Smoking crack cocaine also can cause aggressive and paranoid behavior. As crack cocaine interferes with the way the brain processes chemicals, one needs more and more of the drug just to feel “normal.” Those who become addicted to crack cocaine (as with most other drugs) lose interest in other areas of life.

Crack is a form of cocaine and is one of the most popular drugs amongst substance abusers, with an estimated six million people in the United States admitting to using it. There are both physical and behavioral signs that can indicate abuse. Often, crack users stop caring about their personal …

The fundamentally insane and unsupportable thinking and behavior of the addict must be justified and rationalized so that the addiction can …

The rapid reduction in the intensity of these withdrawal symptoms can constitute a major reason a crack addict continues use. Cocaine also has potent reinforcing effects, defined as “any effect, positive, negative, or both that maintains the behavior that leads to continued administration of the drug.” Thus, the use of cocaine …

That is a very, very tough nut to crack.” Working with … is a psychological and medical problem. Addiction, science has shown, is a physical illness with a psychological component that affects a person’s behavior and way of thinking.

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Crack addiction involves ongoing legal problems like arrests for crack-related disorderly behavior and continuous use of crack … signs and symptoms of crack addiction?

Aug 30, 2008 … Bingers, on average, had used crack longer than non-bingers, but it is not known, whether this suggests that (1) over time, crack users simply are presented with more opportunities to binge, such that given enough time, most users will binge, or (2) as crack addiction increases over time, binge behavior will …

Learn the signs and symptoms of crack use and addiction. … Paranoid behavior; … Someone seeking treatment for a crack cocaine addiction will experience symptoms …

Being aware of the common symptoms and behavior of addiction can be helpful because it makes it possible to indentify people … Crack Cocaine Addiction; Exile …

Jul 18, 2017 … Crack offers the user a brief yet intense high that increases mental alertness and a sense of euphoria, according to Narconon, a California-based drug rehab and addiction treatment center. The crack user may not want or need to sleep as long as the drug is potent, which ranges from five to 30 minutes, …

consumption and addiction to their technology,” Yearsley writes. “They do not have bad intentions, but the nature of capital markets may push us toward AI hell-bent …

Still, Farenthold apologized in that video for an office atmosphere he said included "destructive gossip, offhand comments, off-color jokes and behavior that in …

crack cocaine rehab centers follow a tested procedure to get patients through treatment. The intake process is the start; it consists of getting patients oriented with the facility and conducting a physical checkup. After intake comes detox. The addiction therapy phase consists of counseling and behavioral therapy.

It is likely that dealing with a crack addict will include impulsive and irrational behavior, as well as lying, and risky behavior.

Crack Addiction Behavior. Crack addiction behavior may vary from person to person. However, there is some general crack addiction behavior that is common to all addicts.

Addiction Treatment Centres In Alberta Contents Success rates are Alberta next year Addiction treatment and Alcohol rehab center offering addiction treatment And drug rehabilitation Has residential treatment centres based Opioid Treatment Options In Alberta Canada. Suboxone and Methadone Clinic links, Publicly Funded Residential Treatment Options. Suboxone treatment information. Rural Opioid Dependency Program. A non-profit drug and alcohol rehabilitation centre which

Often the first sign of crack addiction symptoms is that that there is something different or wrong with the patient. Sudden baffling changes in behavior e.g. compulsive, anxious, argumentative, aggressive, angry and/or irritable, easily agitated, hyper vigilant, paranoid, delusions, psychosis; Withdrawal from usual work or …

The post Crack Addict Behavior appeared first on Freedom From Addiction II.

[ladystylestores]

That Old-School Runway Is Looking Pretty Good – WWD

https://pmcwwd.files.wordpress.com/2020/07/couture-stills-fall2021-1.png?w=640&h=415&crop=1

A thought crystalized clearly, before 9 a.m. New York time on Monday, less than five hours into haute couture’s first digital fashion week: The runway can’t reopen for business soon enough. The real, physical runway walked by real, live models in venues open to — hope against hope — live audiences.

This couture season was destined to be a learning curve, one necessitated by an unforeseen, cataclysmic global pandemic that attacked without notice, and certainly without respect for institutional events we once held sacrosanct, like fashion weeks. Thus, to critique fall 2020 haute couture’s creative output at all negatively may seem unfair and even small. But sometimes, “small” is reflected in the job description. The point here isn’t to criticize  — Oh, Lord, how pretentious are some of these film shorts (but, oh, Lord, how pretentious are some of these film shorts) — but rather to note that, early on, this digital fashion week is making the live show model feel plenty relevant, and even essential.

“I think [the week] won’t have the same splendor as a normal haute couture fashion week,” Bruno Pavlovsky, president of fashion and president of Chanel SAS, told WWD on Monday. He nailed it.

Technology has changed our lives with more power, speed and wonder than we could possibly have imagined 20 years ago. But fall’s early couture showings indicate that digital has a long way to go — light years — before it can replace the live fashion event. Oddly, watching these short films under the current forced intimacy — home alone — one was reminded of the genuine, enjoyable intimacy of actually “being there,” an intimacy borne of the gathering of a finite number of people in a finite space watching a one-time-only event, shared communally. It doesn’t get much more intimate than that.

To expect the short-films construct to substitute fully for fashion shows, immediately and seamlessly, is ridiculous; film and live performance are not the same, and this inaugural digital fashion week was orchestrated in haste. But who expected to be over it midday through Day One?

Since March, the haute houses have had to shift gears on a dime to try to make compelling brand statements for fall — perhaps inclusive of a real collection, perhaps not — in a medium not previously utilized for that specific purpose in a major way. At the same time, as a genre, fashion film/video is no longer special. It’s everything and everywhere, a 24/7 onslaught, from high-minded to cheesy and from mega-brand messaging to influencer/editor musings on topics from red-carpet winners to the best summer t-shirt. To be memorable, a fashion film must resonate with power. But watching back-to-back on Monday, the viewing got dull.

For some reason, fashion seems to have decided that “interesting” house-messaging must be capital-A artful, with moods registering between soulful and downright dark, sometimes to the point of skin-crawling pretension. That was the case with Monday’s first seven offerings. One by one, they’re fine; some are even beautiful. One after the other, they made for an exhausting litany of heartfelt, ethereal, introspective and sober — in too heavy a dose for one workday morning.

Schiaparelli opened the couture film festival with a mini feature on creative director Daniel Roseberry’s “Collection Imaginaire” — so titled because the collection won’t be produced. Rather, from his favorite outdoor perch — Washington Square Park in Manhattan, far away from the house headquarters on Place Vendôme — Roseberry sketches out the collection that’s in his mind. No words, just intense drawing scored with intense music against (happily) a beautiful blue-sky day.

Next on the schedule, Ulyana Sergeenko’s film takes the respect-for-craft route, highlighting the outside Russian lacemakers with whom the designer works before shifting focus to her atelier in Moscow. Reverential scenes of busy workers are spliced with photos of the Forties Hollywood sirens who inspire Sergeenko’s work. The film closes with a fast-moving take on a fashion show, a Busby Berkeley-type kaleidoscope of models, only digital, and one of Monday’s few overtly upbeat elements.

Maurizio Galante’s film is seven minutes of a woman walking downstairs. Stairs that appear to be elegant Haussmann-era Parisian stairs, but stairs nonetheless. She descends to voiceover incantations of color names delivered with great passion by a female speaker: “Bleu! Bleu! BLEEEU!” (Add 12 more “bleus.”) “Mauve! Mauve! Mauve! (Add nine more “mauves.”)

Iris Van Herpen enlisted filmmaker Ryan McDaniels and “Game of Thrones” actress Carice van Houten for her film, a mesmerizing study of a single dress — white structured petals with black center filaments — in her signature oeuvre of poetic high tech. Despite some dense accompanying show notes, the film itself is dialogue-free, a creative treatment shaping up as couture’s first bona fide trend.

Through much of the morning, the clothes’ screen time varied, from no real clothes at all at Schiaparelli (though Roseberry’s illustrations project a distinct power-woman attitude with dashes of house-proud surrealism) to Van Herpen’s single dress to Sergeenko’s mini collection, each look shown in full focus. Galante’s stair-walker has numerous costume changes which look lovely — what you can see of them, anyway. Given the moody-broodiness of it all — including the blurs of those passionately identified hues — the clothes were hardly the point.

By the time Maison Rabih Kayrouz and Ralph & Russo aired at 10 and 11, one couldn’t help but delight in sightings of their orange and hot pink dresses, respectively. Like Van Herpen, Kayrouz focuses on the creation of a single dress, his crafted entirely from strips of orange ribbon. The film highlights the dress’ journey from Beirut to Paris, against captivating music by the singer Shadia, which offered distinctive relief from the morning’s more tedious soundtracks.

Ralph & Russo’s Tamara Ralph provided a different kind of relief. She opted off the film artistry path in favor of speaking — yes, words — straight-on into the camera, for a while at least. She discussed her inspiration — the Seven Wonders of the World — before introducing her brand’s new avatar, Hauli, whose name “symbolizes strength and power.” Born of the necessity to find new ways to show clothes in the COVID-19 era, Hauli flaunts several form-fitting gowns against those Seven Wonders backdrops.

Yet, as always during couture, Monday was “Dior Day” — and a curious one, to boot, as once or twice the house’s visually exquisite film veered toward fashion satire. (See preening Narcissus, below.) Maria Grazia Chiuri commissioned Matteo Garrone — he directed last year’s Pinocchio — for “Le Mythe Dior.” In it, two handsome young porters carry a Dior dollhouse filled with miniature dresses through an enchanted woodland populated by magical creatures — nymphs, giant snail, living statue, mermaid, Adam and Eve (or some such naked couple kissing in a tree), Pan (or some such beautiful horned fellow) and Narcissus, whose Sophia Petrillo-meets-Horshack hairdo should have been rethought.

Along their route, the porters stop to allow the mythic types, some in states of semi-undress, to admire and select clothes. Now, the unwoke reality is that most of us look better in clothes than naked. But these young beauties are earthy goddesses (not to mention gorgeous young women in real life). The idea that they’d be so smitten with dresses from the human realm suggests unbecoming self-reverence by the house. Maria Grazia likely didn’t think of that, and she didn’t make the film, Garonne did — oh, well. A more difficult issue: the surprisingly un-diverse casting.

A fashion matter is less troubling. For this collection, Chiuri created 37 miniature looks — doll-size clothes, done to human scale. WWD’s preview featured mostly Fifties-inspired ball gowns. But the dresses chosen by the woodland lasses are more of the Mount Olympus peplos sort, a favorite of Chiuri’s, and nymph-appropriate. They’re beautiful, but the dichotomy makes the focus of the collection unclear. Film-wise, Garrone worked the no-dialogue approach, setting the non-verbal, spritely goings-on to the strains of monotonous music, with a running time of about 10 minutes. Though not at all sober, the lyrical-ethereal vibe at times flirted with tedium.

In aggregate, this sequence of films lacked a fashion “wow” factor, a film-short version of that instant when, at a live fashion show, a collection — or a single dress — just takes your breath takes away. Apart from that, while the productions weren’t downers per se, none delivered something that would feel great right now — a moment of full-on joyful fashion distraction from life’s current larger grim realities. Oh, for some haute joy. Or intrigue. Or something where the mind doesn’t wander for the duration. Or dialogue.

Still, be careful what you wish for. Morning session over, the time came for afternoon viewing. First up: Antonio Grimaldi’s film by Asia Argento, who also co-stars as the elder in an abysmal mother-daughter relationship. The work opens upon the ghostly daughter, clutching a bouquet of dreary flowers against her blood-stained white dress. She’s polite. She introduces herself: “My name is Ælektra, the Unhappy. My companion is grief.”

The runway can’t reopen for business soon enough.

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[thelaaseit]

“You don’t even notice airplanes anymore...”

Original content written on October 27, 2019. Edited April 18th - April 27, 2020.

Right now, in this very moment, I am sitting at a small bar located in a sleepy Italian coastal town. The town: Porto Potenza Picena. My new home. I’ve been living here for a little over a month now and, while out here experiencing, I have been doing a pretty lame job at documenting my new, hip European lifestyle. Let me be the first to say that it’s very difficult to sit down and WRITE when you could be out there and LIVING. But, that being said, something happened to me the other day that was very particular. Something particular enough to get absolutely stuck at the forefront of my mind, right next to my unholy desire to devour homemade pasta and to chug bottles of red wine. In fact, it was JUST particular enough to force me to put a pause on my present, pull out my notebook, and start writing about my past. 

The particular happening that happened to me happened while I was sunbathing on the beach directly behind my apartment. As I laid there-- my back in the warm sand, deeply breathing in the fresh salty air, and absent-mindedly listening to distant Italian chatter-- I happily gazed up at the light blue sky. While soaking in my surroundings, a simple sentence briefly flitted across my mind: You don’t even notice airplanes anymore. Simple as this may have been, it was ever so slightly EXISTENCE SHATTERING for me. 

Why so existence shattering? Because TYPICALLY, every time I look at the sky, I search for airplanes. No matter where I am or what I’m doing, I search for those GOSH DARN airplanes. For example. I must have been elementary school-age. I had accompanied my lovely mother to one of my brother’s soccer practices. I had spent the majority the evening rolling around in the grass but, once the exhaustion hit, I flopped over onto my back and stared up at the sky. Per usual, my eyes automatically searched for the airplanes. I remember finding one peek over the edge of the horizon to my left. I felt a sense of intense wonder and, as I watched it glide across the sky, I asked myself a mess of questions: Where could it be going? Who in the world is even on it? Could this be for work? Or, perhaps, for pleasure? Unblinkingly, my eyes followed the plane’s deliberate movements across the sky. My chest swelled with longing and, as it exited my lane of vision by crossing back over the horizon line to my right, I was filled with a sadness that wasn’t exactly new to me. 

It was at a very young age when my heart first started craving movement and, as time has passed, this phase of mine has not. I’ve traveled a lot in my lifetime. Any money I have ever saved, I have spent right back on travel. No matter how many trips I take, when I return home, I immediately restart my search for that next airplane. For that next adventure.

But now... here... in Porto Potenza Picena... I no longer search for airplanes. When I find myself staring at the sky, I actually get ANNOYED when seeing an airplane. In fact, a couple of nights ago I audibly GROANED in frustration when I saw one. Why? I thought I was staring at a very uniquely shaped cloud. Turned out to be just the jet stream of yet another stupid freaking airplane. After some time passed (and my irritation had subsided) I realized what was happening. I sat there in wonder at my drastic change in behavior. What could this mean? Why was I no longer inspired by the idea of travel? By the idea of movement? 

As I sit here at my bar, in my sleepy coastal town of Porto Potenza Picena, I feel contentment. This quaint little town ended up being everything I needed in my life. The people, the community, the comfortability, the accessibility… tutto. This was my cure. This was what my mind desired and my heart needed. A 2-minute walk can take me to the beach, a 10-minute drive can take me to the hills, another 20-minute drive can take me to the church that houses the home of the FREAKING Virgin Mary (legend says that angels brought it to Loreto brick by brick from Jerusalem). I mean, are you kidding me? I think it’s pretty obvious that the difference between my “then” and my current “now” is VAST. Here lies contentment in everything that I do: in my job, in where I am, in what I am doing, in what I am seeing, in what I am experiencing. I am now annoyed with airplanes because the thought of leaving doesn’t bring me the exhilarating joy and excitement that it once did. Because I have somehow been able to find a stable sense of contentment. 

I wrote this 6 months ago and it’s still valid now. Although, 6 months ago the idea of “stable contentment” came with some questions. Because, for me, emotional stability was hardly attainable. My whole life I have been riding a nonstop emotional rollercoaster that is either at it’s lowest dipping point or at its highest tipping point. So, because of this, 6 months ago I wrote in my notebook a set of questions that I had on the term “stability”. The first being, can a person feel stable in their emotions 100% of the time? To this, I answered, “obviously not”. The second question being, can a person feel stable in their emotions for AT LEAST a single day without taking some sort of guttural blow? And to this, my response was, “God, I hope so”. 

Now, 6 months down the line, I want to revisit those two questions. First, can a person feel stable in their emotions 100% the time? To this, I still answer, “obviously not.” A person can’t go through life like this --------------------. But do people have to unwillingly ride emotional rollercoasters all throughout their days, weeks, months, and years? Again, I answer with, “obviously not.” I think this comes with growth, though. I still haven’t mastered my emotions. Why? Because I’m 24 and don’t know shit. But I am aware that it is possible! And I try to work on my feelings every day. Feel them, acknowledge them, appreciate them, and then continue. Second question, can a person feel stable in their emotions for AT LEAST a single day without taking some sort of guttural blow? My response has changed from “God, I hope so” to “God, I thank you.”

“God,” “The Universe,” or whatever you want to call it (personally, I like calling my God “Pausa”) is beautiful and confusing. Right around the tragically young age of 17, when teenagers are asked to decide what they want to do for THE REST OF THEIR LIVES, is when I started building a relationship with my Pausa. I would pray very hard every night asking her (and yes, my Pausa is a girl) to help me navigate through the EVER SO ROUGH waters that is life. I still pray to her asking the same thing. She has always delivered in strange, strange ways. Strange ways meaning, some times what she gives me isn’t what I want but it always ends up being what I NEED. The reason my response has changed from “God, I hope so” to “God, I thank you” is because, within these last 6 months, Pausa has given me stability through long-standing friends/family that I will always have, new life-long friendships with people that have entered my life just recently, a town that is now starting to feel like a home, and old friends that I have been able to reconnect with just over the past month. All of these things have helped me understand what it means to attain “stable contentment” not only for just a day, but for weeks, and for months. I can’t say years yet, because I have only been living abroad for 7 months. 

The key here, for me at least, is to feel, acknowledge, appreciate, and continue. Feel, acknowledge, appreciate, and continue. I’m ready to continue.