#they just say the most off the wall things and I love it

[madamechrissy]

Let me in your ocean, Swim

The five times Sukuna tried to confess his feelings, and the one that works

Pairings- Sukuna x F reader (both like 23/24)

Summary- You have known Sukuna your entire life, and he's infuriated you for most of it. Since you were kids on a playground he was picking on you, and you decided you hate him (love him!?) little do you know, he's been in love with you since the moment you met. There were five times he tried and epically failed to let you know. You all don't see each other for two years after college, when you run into him on Valentine's day at the bar- and you think, what better for getting jilted tonight then a hate fuck from Sukuna!? But... no, in fact he needs to finally tell you the truth. Sukuna 5+1 valentines story

CW- MDNI/NSFW- Idiots to lovers, enemies to lovers (kinda!?) Sukuna is TERRIBLE at feelings, reader is bratty, he is lowkey a bully when you're younger, go through the five times he tried to tell you (intermingles with the current night) sweet, angsty, smutty. Warnings oh boy a lot- Explicit sex, sexual tension, tummy bulges, breed kink, oral sex (m and f recieving) fingering, rough sex, creampie, possessive Sukuna, lots of dirty talk, alcohol underage, use of recreational drugs etc, it's me so ofc we have a lowkey breed kink lol- LONG ONE- 14.8k wc- TRUST ME PLZ lol

tracks for this Breathe // On My Own // Me & U // Wicked Games // The High

Comments/reblogs so appreciated if you enjoyyyy <3

You didn’t expect to be sitting alone at a bar for Valentine’s day, but here you are, dressed to the nines in a beautiful glittery black dress, hair done up, makeup perfect on your skin. You have glittery bangles along your wrist, and red bottom heels, you’re as dressed up as you ever got, but right before your date, your boyfriend decided to break things off with you.

Which leads you to this hole in the wall bar, across the street from the fancy restaurant you’d sat at for an hour waiting on him, only to get broken up via text. Sighing, you order another drink, tensing then when you hear it, the damn voice of the man who you simultaneously couldn’t stand and also had it bad for, for years and years, ever since elementary school.

“Tch, what’re you doing here brat?” You glare up at him, but when you see just how good Sukuna looks, after two years of not seeing him? You falter, lips parted just so as he smirks down at you.

However, his heart is pounding in his chest, despite certainly not showing you outwardly, you take his damn breath away. Sukuna has always found you to be the most beautiful, infuriating little creature in existence. And you’ve just gotten more beautiful, which in itself irritates the shit out of him, it was hard enough acting ‘normal’ around you all his life.

But now?

“What’re you doing here, Kuna?” He snorts, rolling ruby red eyes, leaning against the bar with an elbow propped on it, glaring at you.

“Don’t call me that, god.”

“It irritates you, so I will.” You smile up at him, sipping the rest of your drink, which he eyes disparagingly.

“What’s that pink shit?”

“Oh, like your hair?” You counter, raising a brow, his jaw sets. “Ya want one, Kuna?”

“No, I don’t want your little bitch drink.” You roll your eyes now, as he sits next to you, and your eyes sweep over his starch white dress shirt and black slacks, stretching over muscles that seemed to have only gotten more pronounced since college.

“Not even my cherry, hmm?” You tease, pulling the maraschino out of your cup, dangling it in front of his face.

“That’s long gone, I’m sure, looking all slutty …” He murmurs, right in your ear, you shove at him, scoffing.

“You’re slutty, Sukuna. Pretty sure you fucked a whole sorority last time we caught up?”

“Mmm, rumors, rumors.” He holds up two fingers now. “Gimme something that’s not a little bitch drink, please.”

“So manly, oh heavens!” You pretend to fan yourself and he can’t stop the laughter, but he soon covers it with a glare.

“Get her some more of this pink crap.” He says, and you are a little surprised then, looking at the handsome man who’s had your heart for so long you can’t remember a time before him.

“Are you buying me a drink?”

“I am buying you a drink. I… it’s been a long time.” He misses you, but the words are caught in his throat.

“It has been a long time. Thank you.” You smile as the bartender hands you another dirty Shirley, and hands Sukuna a glass of whiskey on the rocks. He sips at it, eyes darting over your frame, your sexy body that is so well shown in that dress of yours, all he can think of is unzipping it.

“Where’s the boyfriend?” You blink a bit.

“How’d you know I had one?”

Well, Sukuna’s been insta stalking you but he won’t admit it.

“Heard it from our friends, duh. Just because we don’t see each other doesn’t mean I don’t see them.”

“Yeah well, it’s not like… I didn’t want to see you. We left things…”

“Yeah.” He sighs now, running a hand through pastel locks, a hand with black tattoos and black nails, throwing off this corporate vibe he has, something dark about him, but then, there’s always been. “You single on Valentine’s day?”

“I am, officially. Ass of a boyfriend left me across the street via text. And… are you��”

“Yeah, I also got broken up with, but slapped in the face, and in person. Think they planned the shit?” You giggle, shaking your head and sipping your drink, leaning just a bit closer, one of your legs brushing his, strong muscles of his pressing on yours. He damn near moans just at feeling your body after so, so long.

“Maybe they did. I’ve wanted to see you, though… I just…”

“There’s something I wanted to… tell you. Actually. I thought about calling you, but…”

“Yeah? Calling me?”

“So surprising?”

“You hate me? So yeah.”

Sukuna sighs now, sipping his drink again, looking down into your beautiful eyes, your beautiful face, remembering just all those times he’d ruined it with you. Fuck, since the first moment he met you, he was a dick, and pushed you away, all because the shit he feels terrifies him. And over the years, he’s tried, but he thought you were too far gone, nothing but a regret, a memory.

Something to compare every girl he’s with, never you, are they? There’s no one like you.

But you’re here of all places, and though Sukuna thinks shit like ‘signs’ are the dumbest thing ever, he can’t let this pass, not this time. He takes a breath and his lips part, his fingers then brush your hair back, something far too gentle for Sukuna, something that makes your eyes dilate, your little gasp so sexy he can’t think.

“You trying to fuck me tonight?” You ask, and he chuckles, the gentle brush now a rough grip in your hair, leaning over you.

You taste the whiskey on his breath, you feel his lips so close, your breaths mingling, as your hand comes to his shirt, balling the fancy material in your little fist. “That what you want, brat? Me to fuck you finally?”

“Maybe I do.” He freezes then, blinking long lashes, leaning even closer, free hand gripping your waist in the crowded bar. “A hate fuck? Sounds like the perfect thing to forget tonight.”

“Hate fuck, huh?” What you don’t know is, Sukuna is in love with you.

“Never thought of it? I doubt that. I remember things.” You lean even closer, hand now pulling at the nape of your neck, his other hand pressing against your ribcage, thumb right under the swell of your breasts, shooting desire down your tummy, across your body.

“I remember more, trust me. I need… to tell you shit. Okay? Will your bratty ass listen?”

“Make me.”

“I swear to…” You giggle as he slams his lips on yours, exhaling at how good it feels, god was good the word!? How fucking perfect you feel, mushy things he’ll never admit, his heart thudding in his chest. You whimper, this sound from the back of your throat that has him picturing every sound he’s going to elicit from you tonight.

His lips are firm, but surprisingly gentle for Sukuna, different from the couple of kisses over the years, no it’s too much. His tongue slipping between the seam of your lips, and devouring your mouth. Your arms slip up around his neck, kissing him back, arching toward him more and more. Your years of desire come out, your body reacting to his every movement.

You want him.

He needs you.

He pulls back, taking a breath and smirking. “Fucked out expression how? From a kiss?”

“You’re such a dick, I swear to god.” You shove at him now, as the music from the bar vibrates, beating erratic like your heart.

“Listen… if you can actually listen to me tonight, I’ll make you cum so much you won’t even be able to think about your dumb little ex boyfriend. Yeah?” Your chest heaves up and down with your breaths, vivid images spilling through, his white grin flashes under the neon lights. “Can’t think now?”

“I… fucking… okay. I’ll listen to whatever bullshit you want, I guess.”

“Need me that bad?”

“I’m gonna go-”

“No, shit. Shit, no don’t… stop it.” He holds you to him now, sighing as he looks at your pretty scowl, one that just makes him want you more. “Just give me the night to explain some shit, yeah?”

“Fine. But let’s get out of here after this drink.”

“Desperate to be alone, huh?”

“Y’know, that bartender is kinda cute.” You wink at him then, leaning forward, earning Sukuna yanking at your hair. “Ow! Always did that shit.”

“That’s the first thing I wanted to talk about… the day we met.” You rest your chin on your hand now, hair falling just so as he remembers.

*****

The first time Sukuna tried to confess his feelings, 4th/5th grade (Kuna age 11, Y/N age 10)

You were the new girl, a little shy but so pretty. And well, when you came up to Sukuna and smiled, asking where your class was, he couldn’t even speak, he just stood there, mouth flopping like some fish as you waited. His little brother Yuuji finally answered you, staring at his brother in confusion. ‘it’s right there across the hall’.

“Oh, thank you! What’s your name?” You smile at him then, and your smile is just too… annoying, yes, it annoys Sukuna.

“Yuuji, I’m in fourth grade but Sukuna is in fifth. What grade are you in?” He nudges his brother, who rolls his ruby red eyes.

“I’m in fourth too! Oh, so you’re Sukuna then?” You ask sweetly, turning to Sukuna, something happens then, Sukuna blushes. “Are you okay?”

He scowls at you now. “Of course I am, what’re you looking at?” He demanded, and your mouth opened in surprise.

“What?”

“Yeah, stop staring, new kid.” You roll your eyes now, shaking your head with a narrowing of your own eyes.

“You’re pretty rude.”

“You’re pretty weird.” You scoff then, and Yuuji is waving his arms up and down, stepping between you.

“Be nice, Sukuna. Um, can I walk you to class?” You nod then, giving Sukuna a glare, as Yuuji whispers in his ear.

“You’re such a jerk, she’s pretty.”

“Tch, whatever.” Sukuna watches as you walk off with Yuuji then, he does not like whatever it is you just made him feel. He’s thankful you’re not in any of his classes until you walk right into art, and you’re nervously standing near the teacher. She introduces you, and Sukuna finally learns your name.

“You can sit next to Sukuna!” Sukuna crosses his arms, jaw setting, and you look at him, wondering just what his problem is.

You think he’s really cute, for such a jerk, as you sit next to him and peer over at his sketch, which is actually really good. Trying to still be friendly, you let him know- “that’s awesome!”

Sukuna scoffs, covering it up quickly, no one has really seen his art, and your compliment makes him blush. “I didn’t show you.”

You frown now, brows knitting together. “Um, sorry, but it’s so cool. Could I see more?”

“No!”

“Um…”

“Just stop talking, would you? Bad enough I have to sit by you.” Your lower lip trembles, and Sukuna feels horrible now. “I’m… look, I’m-”

“Sorry.” You whisper, sniffling just a bit and looking at the teacher, and Sukuna hates himself then, he keeps wanting to say something, anything, but when he finally catches you in the hall, you glare at him.

How are you even cuter glaring!?

“Leave me alone, you’re a… a jerk!” You say then, and he scoffs, rolling his eyes at you.

“Me, a jerk? Why because I’m not fawning over the new girl?”

“No, because you… just are a jerk!”

“Well you’re a brat.” Sukuna says, and you gasp, turning angrily and clutching your books, Sukuna rubs his hand over his face, sighing then.

He really messed that up.

*****

You swirl your straw around your cup as Sukuna sips on his whiskey, looking far too damn fine you think, and you know it’s not the couple of drinks in your system. It’s just him and who he is, everything about him since day one drew you in, despite his best efforts at being an ass to you. You smile a bit as you remember the day that you met him.

“You were so mean, for no reason.” You muse softly, he sighs then, running a hand through pink strands of slick backed hair.

“Yeah, I was… then when I tried to apologize, you scowled at me.” You giggle then, the sound ending him completely, the way your cute nose scrunches up, god had he ever told you? Has he ever really said a compliment more than a handful of times to you?

“I was mad at you, for sure. My whole life people really liked me, but you didn’t at all, and I couldn’t fix it.”

“People pleaser.” You sigh at that, leaning a bit on your elbow, breasts showing far too much in your pretty neckline.

“I am, for sure.”

“When you laugh…” He trails off now, psyching himself up, taking a breath as he studies you seriously.

“When I laugh…”

“Your nose scrunches up… it’s cute.” He mumbles, almost like he’s in pain, and you giggle again, making him smile just a bit before he realizes it.

“It is!? Is that a compliment from Sukuna?”

“There are a lot of compliments I have for you. But, yeah, it’s annoyingly cute.” Your giggles relax a bit, as you now bite your lower lip, tempting him to kiss you all over again. “The things I can’t wait to do to you.”

That sobers you up, sending chills across your entire body, desire stark on your pretty face. “Oh yeah?” Your little breathy mumble wrecks him, but outwardly he raises a brow.

“Is that your attempt at being nonchalant, brat? Oh yeah?” He mocks, you shove at him then, as he snorts in laughter.

“Is that your attempt at being sexy- ‘can’t wait to show you little brat’ pshh.” You’re mocking him in a deep tone, Sukuna can’t stop the smirk.

“Bet it worked, bet you’re all wet, hmm?” You pause now, biting your lower lip again, teeth leaving marks when he gently pulls it from your teeth’s grip. “Nothing smart to say?”

“Shut up.” Is all you mumble, and he exhales, ruby eyes glinting as they watch you so carefully, studying your every feature. “So is that what you needed to say? My laugh is kind of cute?”

Sukuna clears his throat now, shifting a bit on the barstool, running a thumb down the glass. “No. The day we met, I should have told you that… you were pretty, and sweet. And I was an ass.” You blink in confusion.

“Sukuna, are you dying or something!? Is this some end of life apology tour!? You better not be, I swear to-”

“Shut it.” He stops you now, a fingertip to your lips. “I ain’t dying, calm down, can a man not… speak on some shit?”

“Sure, but it’s you, like my mortal enemy? Bane of my existence? Bully the entirety of school?”

One of his big hands is brushing against your bare thigh now, you look down at it, all tattooed, veiny, huge… making your tummy flip. “Maybe I wanted to be more than that.”

“Yeah?” Your voice is a breathy whisper, you half wonder if you’re in some dream, Sukuna being nice to you!? Being so close after so long?

“Yeah. So another drink, another story?”

“Hmm, do I get another kiss if I listen?” You tease, feeling the liquor make you bold, warming your insides. Sukuna’s lips quirk up on one side, his breath tickling your neck when he leans close, lips almost brushing against it. You feel your pulse flutter when his plump lips touch the shell of your ear just barely, like a fire igniting inside you, more than any liquor could produce.

“I’ll not just kiss you everywhere, I’ll fucking bite you everywhere, lick you all over, every…” His lips kiss your jaw line. “Pretty.” Your neck. “Inch.” He’s right behind your ear, that sensitive spot, kissing and nipping just so, you bite back a cry and fail, earning his chuckle. “You’re so easy f’me, huh brat?”

“Oh f-fuck you…” Your grumble makes him laugh, the sound tickling you as hiegrips your chin, tilting it up to look at him. “You’re the worst.”

“I know, I have been, for all these years. Ya ready for the next story? Then I promise…” He’s trailing his fingers down your thigh now, making your knees literally knock together, tummy clenching with an insane need you’ve only felt once, back on the last day you all really talked to each other. “Then we can head out of here.”

“Better be good, if it’s boring I’ll leave.” Your half hearted promise just makes him throw his head back in laughter, as he orders two more drinks, loosening his tie just a bit, making your thoughts haywire. “Where to, then? What trip down memory lane of bully Sukuna?”

Sukuna tenses just a bit, the things that he’s held in so long threatening to spill. “Middle school… more specifically, seventh grade, Yuuji’s party?”

It’s your turn to tense, at the brutal memory, so long ago. “Oh…”

*****

The second time Sukuna tried to confess his feelings, 7th/8th grade (Kuna age 14, Y/N age 13)

 You were boogie skating with these fancy rainbow skates you saved all your allowance for, as all your friends were gathered around, some over at concessions, some at the arcade, some skating alongside you. But Sukuna? He was leaning on the edge of the brightly colored wall, watching no one but you, he could pick you out of anywhere, really.

You were so good at skating too, legs crisscrossing to the beat, your friends and his all murmuring about how good you are at it. You’re giggling as you whisper something to your friend Nobara, her and Yuuji were all best friends, along with Megumi, who was sipping on a coke next to Sukuna and Yuuji.

“She’s really good, isn’t she?” Megumi says, and Sukuna scoffs, shrugging.

“I guess.”

“She’s insane at it, she teaches kids and everything.” Yuuji says.

“You got it so bad for her.” Megumi teases, and then Sukuna tenses a bit, looking at you again, then at his brother, who is blushing.

“Nah, she’s just my friend. She’s so pretty though.”

You and Nobara are hopping off the floor, and Nobara looks right at Sukuna then, blinking her brown eyes and narrowing them. Sukuna wonders at just what you’re telling her, as you nervously bite your lower lip, then you’re waving your arms wildly as Nobara skates over to the three of them, and you tentatively follow, color decorating your cheeks under neon lights.

“Hey, Sukuna.” Nobara says, and he leans back on the wall.

“Yeah, what is it?”

She comes closer then, leaning a little too close. “Do you like her?” She says your name then, and Sukuna glares, stuttering, Megumi and Yuuji snicker in laughter behind him when you approach.

“What kind of question is that?” He says, and Nobara glares now.

“It’s just a question, okay? You can’t keep your eyes off her.” She smirks, and you cover your face in embarrassment.

“Ignore her, please.” You mumble, wanting to fall into a hole then and there, as the loud music blares around the rink.

“Everyone says you have a crush.” Nobara continues.

“You do stare at her all the time…” Megumi says, Sukuna turns away then, crossing his arms, feeling so embarrassed he can’t think.

“You don’t have to answer, Sukuna, it’s okay…” You touch his shoulder then, and just a touch from you ruins his middle school brain, when he looks down at your cute little face. “I figured you didn’t, she just…”

“I don’t, not at all.” He says the words so sharply you yank your hand back like it was burned, eyes wide on him now.

“Okay.” You manage, and Sukuna hates how your face falls then.

“You’re such a jerk! Why do you have to say things like that!?” Yuuji says, and he scoffs.

“Always coming to her defense, aren’t you the one with the crush?”

“He’s my friend, Sukuna.” You say, as Yuuji scowls at his older brother.

“Yeah well, I wouldn’t ask you out if you were the last girl in school.” Your face falls now, and everyone gasps, as there were more kids from your class gathering around. Sukuna falters then, but you cross your arms, scowling.

“Good, because I would never say yes! You’re the last boy in the world I’d ever go out with!” You shout it practically, people are all whispering as you skate off then, fury raging through your veins, and Sukuna stands there, as everyone looks at him with confusion.

“What’s your problem!? She really likes you, you’re so stupid!” Nobara hisses, chasing after you now, and Megumi and Yuuji shake their heads, leaving Sukuna to skate off towards the lockers, hastily taking them off as his mind whirls with what he’s just done to you.

You’ve done nothing but be as nice as you can to him since he’s Yuuji’s brother, but that’s the only reason he thinks you’ve tolerated him at all. He picks on you constantly, he tugs at your hair, he’s even snipped a part of it off in elementary school, he may or may not have kept it.

He throws paper balls at you, he tugs at your shirt and makes fun of you, and even through all of it you’ve not done more than scowl, roll your eyes, tell him off. But Sukuna has it bad for you, in fact he thinks he’s in love with you, but he just becomes more of an idiot as you all are getting older. You affect him more and more as you become prettier and prettier.

He watches the way the light hits your face in class and stares dreamily before you’ll catch him, and he’ll scowl instead. He’s an idiot.

And now he knows he hurt you.

As he’s outside, about to walk home, you’re standing against the wall, covering your face, in tears, when you see him, turning away quickly. Sukuna pauses then, his heart breaking, knowing he’s embarrassed you, but he doesn’t know what to say. He walks up, earning your glare, though your eyes are puffy, and your nose is all red from rubbing it.

“I… I…” He trails off, and you shake your head.

“If your goal is to embarrass me, you succeeded. I should have never told her I liked you…”

Sukuna sputters, mouth opening and closing. “You what!?”

“I don’t anymore, don’t worry.” You rub at your eyes now, sobs catching in your throat when you look up into ruby red eyes, eyes that apparently hate you, but you see something different, something softer.

“Why would you like me?” He asks then, and you want to laugh.

“How would I know? You’re a mean jerk, always have been. Maybe I needed you to be mean like that, to really knock that idiot idea out of my head.” Sukuna feels himself breaking inside now, two hands coming to your shoulders, making you gasp as you tilt your head back to look at him.

He’s already taller than anyone, and the more he grows up the cuter he is, the worse your crush gets. The more you hang out at Yuuji’s house, the more you see him, the more you fall, shit the meaner he is the more you fall. You can’t even find it in you to stay mad at him, when he makes your heart race, when you’re drawing doodles of him and you in your notebook.

You asked Nobara not to say anything, but she was so sure that he liked you back, though you knew he didn’t, you knew he hated you. He has since he met you, and you don’t know what you did.

“Listen, I shouldn’t have… I shouldn’t have done that. I didn’t mean it.” You scoff, shoving at him, his hands fall.

“You don’t need to feel sorry for me. I’ll be fine. I’ve had worse.”

Sukuna blinks back his own emotion, gulping. “I didn’t mean it.”

“Then why’d you say it?” You look up at him, when your eyes look at him like that he hates himself so much, knowing he’s just lying to you, to himself.

“I just… everyone was…”

“You care so much what people think, despite acting like you don’t.” Sukuna scowls at you now. “Embarrassed to like me?”

“What!? Why the fuck would it be embarrassing to like you?”

“You tell me. Not pretty enough? Not popular enough? I see who you hang out with. Just forget it, I promise I’ll never say I like you again.” You peek at your phone now, sliding it up, but Sukuna cups your face, leaning close, your eyes dart to his lips, thinking for some insane moment he’d be your first kiss.

No way though.

“You’re pretty, okay? Very pretty.” You pause then, mouth open in a gasp, and Sukuna laughs without humor. “How can you think you’re not?”

“I… um… you…”

“I didn’t mean it.” He steps closer, thumb brushing a tear away from your cheek. “I’m sorry I… made you cry.”

“You always make me cry.” You whisper, and he gulps now.

“Yeah, I do. But this time… I’m really sorry.”

You sigh then, hand touching his wrist, making his own pulse race, as he thinks wildly of kissing you, of something he’s dreamed of since he first found out what it was. “You don’t have to apologize for not liking me back.”

“I-”

“But for saying it like that? Yeah it was mean.”

“Listen…”

“Thank you for apologizing.” You smile sadly, backing off when you see your mom’s car pull up, and Sukuna is left dumbfounded. “Don’t worry, I swear I won’t say it again, I won’t even… think it again.”

You know you’re lying.

Sukuna says nothing as you get in your mom’s car, and she’s asking if you’re okay, he watches her hug you for a moment before she begins to drive, and he sees your eyes full of tears again, streaking down your face. Yuuji walks out front then, nudging him as he watches his brother’s eyes glimmer with what looks like tears.

“Why’d you do it?” Yuuji asks, and Sukuna sighs.

“I don’t know.” He admits, Yuuji puts a hand on his back then.

“You’re a big idiot.”

“Excuse me!?”

“You are.”

He was.

*****

Suddenly all that embarrassment floods you, you tense at the memories, hating how vivid they are, after all these years. You nervously look away, downing the rest of your nearly empty drink in one gulp. Sukuna is quiet then, and you wonder just what his angle is, is he here to embarrass you again? Is this some long term bully shit? Is that an apology tour?

“Are you in therapy and making rounds?” You ask softly, voice breaking, and then you feel his hand wrap the back of your neck, resting his head against yours, making you ache for him.

“I don’t feel bad for shit I’ve done, ever, except what I’ve done to you.” You look at him, he’s too close, far too close. He sees your emotions mirroring his own, and it breaks him. “I should have never fucking done it.”

“Sukuna, we were in middle school. It’s fine.”

“It’s not though, because it was such a blatant lie. God how did you not know how bad I was down for you?” You suck in a breath, shaking your head quickly, and hopping off the barstool.

“You’re lying! What even is this shit.” Sukuna pulls you between his thighs, brushing your hair back behind your ear as you tremble. “Sukuna…”

“I am not lying, but I was then, an idiot kid who was mean as shit to you.”

“Why were you so mean?”

“I’m trying to get there. Can you keep listening?” You shake your head, sniffling. Now, it’s just like being back there, back on that day where you were so embarrassed you could hardly face anyone.

“I can’t handle this shit… it’s things I’ve shoved so far back…”

“I know.” Sukuna’s strong thighs are under your tiny little hands, pressing against his muscles under the expensive fabric, as everything fades in the world but him, but the longing that’s eating you both up from the inside. Your breaths come quicker when he looks at you, that intense way, with his arrogant smirk finally not on his face, just once.

“Why do you wanna do this, rehash it?” You ask now, leaning even closer, until you’re right against his body, and he’s bending low.

“I need to tell you some important shit, I just need you to listen. Do I need to reward your bratty ass for some patience?” There’s that smirk.

“Maybe, I offered to hook up, not go through yearbooks.”

“Fine, so let’s get out of here, let you get some air, and we’ll continue. I’ll… take care of you, hmm?”

“Yeah, think you could?” He snorts, rolling his ruby eyes, hopping down, towering right over you, taking over your every sense.

“You ask dumb fucking questions, I think that’s the one thing you know I could do…” He leans right down, cupping your face. “Ruin you for anyone.”

“Big talk.” You’re so full of shit, your body is on fire, your heart is pounding out of your chest, the clothes feel too tight, everything swirls around you.

“You know it’s not.” Sukuna pays for the tab then, walking you out, the cool night air hits you, making you shiver, so he wraps a jacket around your shoulders, shocking you. “You think I’m that much of a dick?”

“Yes.” He laughs then, that booming laugh that makes him throw his head back, as you snuggle against his jacket, inhaling the expensive scent of musky cologne. “You have nice taste though.”

“Bet you do too. A nice taste.” He pulls you against his hard chest, feeling your soft breasts press against him, making his cock hard just from that. “Wanna know how badly I’ve wanted to?”

“T-taste me?” You whisper, all bravado and teasing gone, the breeze gently blowing your hair around as you wait for his driver.

“Fuck yes. Should I right here, brat?” He slips his hand under the lapels of the jacket, slipping over your dress and slipping it up, as people walk in and out of the busy little dive bar. You feel yourself so wet you’ve made a werspot in your panties, panties his thumb finds slowly.

“Right h-here?” You whisper nervously, when his driver pulls up in a whole fucking limo, you blink in surprise at it, as his hands fall.

“You’d let me, so desperate.” You glare again, making him grin. “I love when you scowl at me.”

“Are you feeling okay!? And a limo, pretentious.” You eagerly slide in with his help though, seeing everything one could dream of, as he leans over, pulling out a bottle of champagne, raising a brow, the slits in it just making him sexier, damn him. “You just ride in a limo?”

“Why not? I have these long legs, and I like to be comfortable.”

“Psh…” He pours you a glass of champagne then, and you eye a little white baggie curiously, along with a bag of weed. “Damn you partying everywhere?”

“On occasion, usually this shit is for clients though.” You giggle a bit, sipping the champagne. “I would never offer coke, but you smoke?”

“No, not really. I did once and it made me so stupid.”

“Fair enough.” He closes up the little open box, arm over you casually, kissing his way up your neck carefully, enjoying your sighs of pleasure. “Do you want a reward for listening to two stories?”

“Hmm, what do I get? A gold star?” He smirks, shaking his head and kissing you, the tart of the champagne swapping between your tongues, the kiss is slow, sensual, before it builds, and he’s setting down your glasses. He’s got you on his lap so quickly your head spins, and you’re grinding on his length, gasping in pleasure, your head falling back.

“Holy… f-fuck…” He huffs, all bravado gone when he feels your slick warmth through the layer of his dress pants. “You’re that hot?”

“Am I?” You can’t think, not when you feel his length pressed, making you whimper, which he chuckles at, nipping your collarbone between his teeth.

“That little whine? Fuck… pathetic.”

“I hate you.” You grumble then, shoving at him, but he holds you by your hips, pressing you against him harder. “Let me go, ass.”

“I like you pathetic, sweet, whiny. Sexy as fuck.” You are dragged back down for a kiss, your teeth clicking with the intensity, as you roll your hips more and more, and he slips those hands up, the veins popping out when he grabs you bruisingly. “Everything about you is made to drive me insane.”

“You’re saying insane shit, Sukuna. Is this a booty call, a hate fuck… or…” You pause, gasping as he thumbs your clit over your panties, pressing against the damp fabric, making you whimper again, eyes rolling back.

“Ya think that’s all I want? No, brat, the reason I didn’t do shit… is because… I know I’ll never be able to fuckin’ stop.” You’re flipped under him, back pressing against the seat, as he hovers over you. You yank his tie down, slamming his lips against yours, hungry lips that drink every moan you have when his hand slips between your thighs, yanking your thong to the side.

“Kuna…” He groans, slipping fingers up and down your slit, you’re trembling now, breaths quicker and quicker.

“Need something, brat?” Your brows lower, you have an insult on the tip of your tongue when his finger tip presses your tight entrance, and then Sukuna loses it, shoving his finger all the way in, moaning. “You’re this fuckin tight?”

“Ngh…” You can’t manage an answer, not when he’s crooking his finger just so, pressing that little spot inside you, finding it better than any boyfriend could just the first time, and your walls are gripping his thick digit, while your hand still clutches his tie.

“There it is, ha- feel her, fuck.” Sukuna is simultaneously in control and losing control as he plays you, curling his fingers in syrupy wetness, making you fall apart under him, hips bucking when his thumb presses your clit again. “Like both, that pussy so slutty f’me?”

“S-slutty…” Your brain short circuits, when he slips in two, stretching you out, your dress scrunched up over your hips, he hovers over you, watching every expression on your pretty face avidly.

“That’s it… let go, huh? Make a fucking mess.” You’re panting, you’ve never cum from just fingers like this, not when he’s building that tension, pressing two up and rubbing your clit, until you’re reaching higher and higher. “Feel it, feel her, she wants to cum, just let her, huh?”

“F-fuck!” You scream out then, kissing him deeply, desperately, as he makes your pussy convulse around him, orgasm washing through you in waves, until you’re weak and boneless under him, twitching cunt gripping his fingers, so slick you hear it.

“That’s it, there you go.” He rubs his fingers up and down your slit now, easing up, sucking your juices off his fingers, cheeks hollowing. You gulp at the sight, of the sexiest fucking thing you’ve seen, his eyes rolling back in his skull. “Can’t wait to bury my face, eat you so good you pass the fuck out.”

“Wh-what? You…” You can’t function, from fingers, when he kisses you again, slower, letting you taste yourself.

“Can’t wait to make you stupid. Fuck your brains out. Be nothing but me, brat, yeah?” His husky voice, his tight grip, his brutal kisses destroy you, they’re not the kiss you shared last time, not even close, he’s letting go, he’s ending you.

“K-Kuna…” He exhales now, easing off you as he helps you up, your coat having fallen onto the seats, leaving him to caress your bare arms gently.

“Feel better, brat? So needy.” You smack at him, only making him laugh just a bit. “Wanna know what I should’ve told you then?”

“Shit… forgot all of that.” You blink rapidly, disoriented.

“Cock drunk off fingers? So easy.”

“You know, drop me off-”

“Hush, brat.” He yanks you up, sitting you right on his lap, but this time sideways, sipping his drink and then holding the glass to your lips, you sip greedily, sighing and finding your arms wrapping around his neck, as he pulls you even closer against him, burying his face against your neck.

“What did you need to tell me then, Kuna?” You whisper, getting weaker by the moment, the orgasm destroying you, and making you wonder…

What would his dick be like?

His mouth?

If his fingers casually do that?

“I should have told you…” He exhales, pulling you close, burying his face in the crook of your neck and inhaling your scent greedily. “That I did have that crush, fuck way more than that, you were all I could think of. You still are.”

You still now, pulling back a bit, as your eyes lock in the led lit limo, your breaths mingling as they come quicker and quicker. “Y-you liked me?”

He shakes his head. “That wasn’t even the word. There’s a stronger word… one that terrified me then. I was a little ass, a shithead.”

“Yeah you were.”

He glares, pinching your hip then, making you yelp. “Can’t wait to occupy that bratty fucking mouth.”

“Oh yeah? Gonna shut me up?” You whisper, earning his cock leaking precum now, god only you could have this effect on him.

“I’ll shut you up, have your voice hoarse, shove my cock so deep.” You whimper, shifting, and he kisses you again, brutal and rough, teeth almost making your lower lip bleed, his grip on your hips pressing so deep you can’t breathe. “Hoarse from screaming, from my cock stretching your throat, so fucked out you won’t be able to sit or walk.”

“This is a lot of talk, Kuna. How many more fucking stories before you back it up, hmm?” You demand, voice breathy, he smiles then.

“Three.”

“Oh come on!”

“Shut it, brat. You ain’t gonna die, ain’t had my dick this long.”

“Well hurry your mean bully stories up.” You earn a gentle smack on your cheek, only making you whine out, as you smack him back, making him die for you, kissing you again before he remembers.

He needs to tell you it all.

“Make 'em quick, dammit.”

“Slutty brat.” He earns another smack, grinning, white teeth glinting. “Fine, fine… how about that time we kissed in high school?”

You heat up then. “Oh…”

*****

The third time Sukuna tried to confess his feelings, junior/sophomore year of HS- (Kuna age 17, Y/N age 16)

By this time, Sukuna already had a reputation, he was the bad boy, always in and out of trouble. He rode a ridiculous motorcycle around, and he always had the new flavor of his month on the back of it. You barely even knew a girl who hadn’t made out with Sukuna… or probably more, but you were not one to care.

Sukuna and you went from enemies to nothing. He quit picking on you, and in some fucked, weird way you missed it, any of his attention. Walking through the halls and seeing him with his arm around a new girl all the time filled you with some odd sensation you didn’t wanna think of.

It’s a party over at Gojo’s house tonight, his parties were kind of ridiculous because of just how rich he was, and he damn near lived all alone. There was an insane amount of people there, as you navigated the party with a red solo cup in your hands, so nervously, Yuuji came bouncing over to you waving with his happy little grin on his face.

“Hey!” He shouts your name, Megumi follows in tow, smiling just a bit, a mere quirk of the corner of his lips.

“Hey Yuuji, Megumi. Where’s Nobara?”

“She’s over there, about to play… suck and blow.” Yuuji snickers now, you giggle at him and roll your eyes, looking over as people are sucking on a debit card, passing it in a circle, you see Gojo there, kissing a girl then, making you blush a bit as they really go at it.

“Oh… that game sounds…”

“Germ ridden.” Megumi declares with a shiver, you snort in laughter then.

“Yes, germ ridden.” You agree, then your heart stops as Sukuna is right in the mix, he’s towering over everyone but Gojo, as he passes the card to and from the girls on either side of him. For some reason, every time you see him you get this feeling, it’s not butterflies, it’s vicious moths, aggressive and beating you. 

Yes, moths you think. Sukuna didn’t give butterflies.

He smirks at you like he just knows something all the time, and nothing could be more irritating. Seeing you now, Gojo shouts your name, waving you three over to the game, the table in front of them was littered with shot glasses and fallen empty cups. “Hey sweets!”

“Satoru, hey!” He gives you a big hug.

“Mwah!” You giggle as he kisses your forehead, Satoru Gojo is a touchy feely friend to damn near everyone, including Sukuna. “Thanks for coming, I know it’s not your scene.”

“I totally snuck out for this, it better be good.” You tease, and Satoru wiggles his brows, brushing back silky white hair, as Sukuna scowls at the gesture. He hated just how touchy he was with the girl Sukuna so secretly pined for.

But you certainly didn’t know he did, in fact Sukuna kept it such a good secret you thought he straight up hated you. Although the picking on you eased up some as you all got older, you’re just getting prettier, sweeter, smarter. You don’t hang out as much with Yuuji, and Sukuna misses you there. He has one class with you and he thinks he’s maybe said a handful of things to you this year.

“You can stand right… here.” Satoru moves another girl over between Yuuji and Megumi, and puts you smack dab between him and Sukuna, making you tense up as you look at him.

“Hah, why her?” Sukuna says then, your fists clench at your sides, Satoru lets out a little laugh.

“Prefer me next to you, baby boy?” He blows a kiss at Sukuna, and he grimaces, earning the laughter of everyone around, except you, feeling just how much Sukuna still can’t stand your presence, for whatever reason.

“God no, okay fine.”

“Yes, I know it's so terrible, huh?” You mumble, Satoru hands you the card then with a smirk.

“No way, you’re the best partner. Get started missy.” You suck on it then, pressing it between your lips and Satoru’s, as each of you passed the card. Along the way it falls across from you, and two people have to make out, everyone else has a drink. You cough just a bit at the burn of this god awful punch you’re sipping then, and Sukuna gives you that sardonic ass look.

“Can’t handle a drink, brat?”

“No, I never have…” He blinks a bit then.

“Oh, shit… why-”

“Pay attention, Sukuna.” Gojo calls, and he turns then, sucking on the card, then bending low, one hand brushing your shoulder as he blows the card on your lips, then you turn and go to blow the card onto Gojo’s as the card clatters to the table.

‘Ooooh’ everyone’s whispering and giggling as Satoru bends low, tilting your chin up to look up into his pretty blue eyes, Sukuna’s fury grows with every second, as he’s never seen you with anyone, thank god.

He could almost pretend you were his, that he didn’t get in his own way, that he doesn’t long after you for every moment of every day until this very moment. When Satoru leans down and kisses you, he feels it like a punch to the gut, something nauseating, seeing his hands on you.

His lips on yours.

Sukuna is downing a shot and having to look away when Satoru’s hand entangles in your hair at the nape of your neck. He’s never wanted so badly till take someone the fuck out, and for what? You’re not his, you probably never would be, it’s not like he has any reason to be this upset. But…

You’re gasping as Satoru kisses you deeply, slipping his tongue in between your lips, and your tummy flutters as he does. Satoru’s breath is sweet, and little does he know yet, he’s your first kiss, then and there in front of countless people. He pulls back with a little smile, his snowy lashes lower over his eyes, as you try to gather yourself, he leans in against your ear.

“You’re a good kisser, sweets.” You smile a bit, laughing breathlessly.

“My first.”

“No way!?” He pulls back and blinks a bit, eyes looking at the huge, furious pink haired man behind you. Satoru smirks mischievously, it’s no secret to him or any of Sukuna’s friends how bad he has it. “I’ll keep it secret.”

Satoru crosses his chest with his fingers in the sign of a cross, and you exhale in relief. “Thank you. Shots?”

“Shots!” You both down shots with everyone, and then Satoru picks up the game again, as you turn just a bit to see Sukuna glaring down at you.

“Something wrong?” You ask curiously, and he laughs then, a mocking sound, shaking his head.

“Why would shit be wrong?”

“Right, you didn’t have to kiss me.” You say with a pat on his arm, and he gulps down more of his drink, before his hand crushes the solo cup.

“Tch.” He says nothing as the card hits him again, and you almost assume it will fall, that he’ll kiss someone, but it doesn’t, not until it hits you, then the card clatters to the fucking ground, leaving you looking up at him wide eyed.

“Oooh, those two!?” Someone says, and everyone stares at you both, it’s obvious Sukuna’s a bully to you, and that you can’t stand him.

“Two kisses in one game already?” Satoru teases, you bite your lip then, looking at Sukuna’s mouth, set in a line.

“You don’t have to.” You say softly, and Sukuna snatches you up against him then, shocking you, your eyes fly to his.

“Think I’m scared, brat?” He whispers.

“I think you don’t want to.” You whisper back, and you expect it, some retort of his, but he slams his lips down on yours, taking over every sense you’ve ever had, tasting your lips and tongue as he devours you then. It’s not sweet and sensual like Satoru, it’s full of everything he’s ever felt, pouring in your lips.

Your hand slides up his arm, across a bicep, thumb brushing it when his two hands find purchase on your waist, pulling you closer. He kisses you hard and brutal, his hands tightening to a bruising touch as he practically growls into your mouth, his tongue moving against yours. You don’t even know what you’re doing, but it feels all consuming.

It’s wild and fiery, and you can feel his heart slamming in his chest, his breathing heavy as yours come in shallow pants, and it’s like everything stops around you. You can’t remember everyone is watching you, can’t be embarrassed when a hand slips up your spine, and he tilts his head to get better access to your mouth. You can’t hear any of the whispers, not with your heart pounding in your ears.

You don’t know why you’re kissing him back with such fervor, why your arms are wrapped around his neck, the boy you hate, right? The boy who’s made school awful at times, who loves to fuck with you almost every day, you think maybe it’s the alcohol, maybe it’s the thrill of it all, but as your kiss ends you know you’re wrong. Kisses don’t feel like this, do they?

He pulls back, damn near ready to tear into you here and there in front of everyone, something feral happening to him, Sukuna has already been with a couple of girls, but he never felt anything more intense than kissing you, then seeing your reddened plump lips, swollen from him. It drives his high school brain absolutely erratic, when he cups your face, looking how small you are compared to him.

He pictures lifting you and-

“Okay, okay… calm down or get a room.” Satoru teases, as Yuuji and Megumi have their jaws on the damn floor. 

Everything is spinning now, not from the alcohol but from that kiss, from the intensity of his emotions crashing into yours. You pull away, panting, and his eyes are so dark then, his pupils dilated with something you’ve never seen before. Is it… desire? Is it… curiosity? It feels like something more… something…

You blush furiously, clearing your throat when you realize you’re just standing there with your mouth open, in front of an entire party. Sukuna doesn’t stop staring at you, in fact he can’t rip his eyes off you, nor does he take his hands off you, as you tremble now, goosebumps where his touch still sits on your skin.

“I need some air… too many kisses.” You manage, before running out then, struggling to get a breath, the tiny amount of alcohol is coursing through your veins, mixing with the heat from Sukuna’s kisses.

You’re inhaling the night air greedily, looking up at the starry sky, shaking your head as you cover your overheated face. You’d kissed Satoru and Sukuna, and Satoru had been so fun, so sweet and exciting. But what the actual heck was that with Sukuna!? What was this feeling you can’t shake, you can’t cope with!?

Sukuna dies to go after you, to finish everything he started, to kiss your face, your neck, perhaps more if you were ready. He would be happy just kissing you though, nothing else, if you offered just that, because he’s never felt it. Satoru, Suguru and his other friends are all snickering at him now.

“Go after her, Romeo.” Suguru says, and Sukuna glares at him.

“What? Why?”

“C’mon man, we all saw. Looked like you’d eat her.” Satoru says.

“In more ways than one?” Suguru chimes in, earning Sukuna’s angry glare, he shakes his head then. “Oh stop this… she’s hot, why not go for it?”

“She’s the bane of my existence. A kiss doesn’t change that.”

“She’s available then?” Satoru asks teasingly, as you’re walking back up, getting a drink poured by Nobara.

“Of course she is… it was just a kiss in a game.” You hear him then, and Nobara instantly has her hand comfortingly on your back.

“Don’t pay attention, he clearly was into you.” She murmurs, Satoru eyes you both then, before looking back at Sukuna.

“So if I ask her out you’re cool with it buddy?” He teases with a big grin.

“If you what!?”

“Mmm, ask her out. If you don’t even like her that way?” Sukuna sputters now, and everyone’s whispering about him, about the kiss.

“Why ask me?” He huffs with disdain, and you quietly join back in, this time on the other side of Satoru, Sukuna notices it furiously, making a show of kissing the next girl as the card drops again.

You hate how you feel about it, about him.

As you’re dancing later with Satoru, you watch him sitting on the couch with two girls on his lap, but his eyes are laser focused on you, every motion you make with your hips in a figure eight motion. You feel his eyes like a brand on your skin, like he’s undressing you with them, but he doesn’t come near you, you’re both just across the room, with the energy between you.

The amount of times Sukuna replays this in his mind over and over, the kiss that destroyed him. But instead of telling you how he feels, he says nothing, watching as you move on, and as he pretends he is as well, but is he really? Will he ever be?

*****

You’re remembering the kiss vividly, Sukuna watches your eyes go fuzzy, as you both pull up to his place. You just sit there, nervously shiting in his lap. “Those were… my first kisses. Isn’t that insane?”

“What was insane was that I wanted to kill him for kissing you, I wanted to kill anyone who touched you, kissed you.”

“You did?” You ask softly, he nods then, smirking just a bit.

“Best kiss I had.”

“What!?”

“I should have told you. Not acted like…

“A dick?”

“That mouth, brat.” He is glaring as you giggle. “I acted like I didn’t care, but I did… and your bratty ass dated Satoru after that!?”

“Well, he was sweet and asked me out. What’d you expect me to wait for you to figure it out?”

“Yes.” You both laugh softly then, his strokes up and down your spine making you long for more and more of him, every bit of his body, his touch, his heart.

“Three stories down, why don’t I…” You trail your fingers down his dress shirt, over his rippling abdomen. “Return that favor?”

“Killing me, brat.” He exhales, and soon you’re kissing in his elevator, as you ride up to his fancy penthouse, your breath catching at it. “Ya like?”

“Damn, you’re like rich!?”

Sukuna throws his head back, sliding his jacket off you then, eyeing your skin hungrily, thinking of all the ways he wants to kiss it, bite it, taste it. “Yeah, I’m fucking rich.”

“So humble too.”

“Why should I be? Fuck that.” He then hands you a glass of water, making your eyes narrow.

“Rich as fuck and I get water!?”

“It’s Evian.”

“Psh, where’s the liquor stash?”

He brushes your hair back then, gently. “Want you fully aware for the last two stories, yeah? Then you can have another if you want.”

“Yes, dad.” You tease, then his nostrils flare, making your lips turn up as you watch his reaction. “You like to be called Daddy don’t ya, freaky Kuna?”

Sukuna’s scowl just deepens, as he crosses his arms. “Oh shut that mouth, swear to god.”

“Shut me up- mnh!” Sukuna’s grabbed you right under your chin, squeezing your throat just so, as his free hand grips your ass.

“You listen to this one, I’ll let you suck me. And the last one, I’ll finally lick that pretty pussy.” You whine when he finds your slick heat over your panties, everything going just a little fuzzy. “Fuck you in positions you’ve never heard of.”

“All talk.” He lets you go, shaking his head, kissing you deeply again, you are falling into it, into how good he feels, letting it all surround you.

“Ya know I’m not, admit it.”

“Shush.” You take your water with a shaky hand, drinking it then.

“Good girl.”

Good girl!?

You can’t handle that from him, can’t handle the heat pouring between your thighs, in your tummy, making you ache for him more and more. “This story was about a time you didn’t have water, and you were all over me.”

You draw a blank then, shaking your head. “Psh, what!?”

“Mmhmm. Come, sit down.” He guides you over to an elegant living room, with a spacious black couch, everything sleek and modern, floor to ceiling windows overlooking the night sky.

“Beautiful.” You murmur softly, touching the clear glass for just a moment, he comes up behind you, kissing across your neck.

“I’ll fuck you on this window, let everyone have a show.”

“What!?”

“Let ‘em know you’re mine this time.”

“Sukuna!” You are dragged to the couch, sat down right next to him, his arm around you.

“Sip more water. So thirsty.”

“I really hate you.”

“You say that…”

“Yeah.” He tilts your chin up with two fingers, pressing his lips over yours over and over, little sweet kisses you don’t expect. “Mmm, so… remember your first frat party?”

“Barely! Oh shit I think I got drunk.”

“Oh yeah you did.

*****

The fourth time Sukuna tried to confess his feelings, your senior year HS, his Freshman year college (Kuna age 19, Y/N age 18)

“Y’know… S-Sukuna… fuck you’re kinda hot!?” You’re stumbling as you speak to Sukuna that night, dressed in some mini skirt and crop top, showing everything. You make him furious, showing that body that seems to get prettier every year, the top showcasing far too much of your pretty breasts, the skirt showing too much of your sexy thighs.

Thighs he’d die to have wrapped around his head.

“What now, brat?” He demands, and you giggle, clearly shitfaced, you never partied so you’re an insane lightweight. And your friend is currently making out in a corner, leaving you stumbling over to him in heels that make no sense for you, for the girl he’s known so long. “What’s with the skank fit?”

“Fuck you I’m hot.” You giggle, doing a spin, and then nearly falling, Sukuna catches you with an arm around your waist, warm body pressed against his.

“That alcohol spiking that confidence?”

“Jus’ because you don’t think- m’hot doesn’t mean… m’not k?” You toss down your drink, giggling breathlessly, looking up at him with dilated eyes.

“When have I said you’re not?” He asks softly, guiding you away from the crowd, from the eyes of too many hungry frat boys. You somehow end up on his lap, arms around his neck, giggling and scrunching that cute ass nose of yours.

“You’ve said m’pretty like once. In middle school? Thass it, Kuna.”

“God, don’t call me that, drunky.” He brushes your hair back then, and you pause, inhaling just a bit, sudden clarity in a brief drunk haze. “You’re the prettiest brat there is, yeah? You’re gonna forget this. So fuck it.”

“The prettiest brat?” You repeat, and he smiles, nodding, before hissing when you shift, straddling him.

“The fuck are you doing!?” He demands, hands pressing on your waist, while you lean your face low, breath against his lips.

“Jus- wanna kiss. Or more… always wanted you to be-”

“Shh, stop.” He puts a hand on your mouth, shaking his head. “You’re shitfaced, don’t go saying dumb shit.”

You lick at his palm, giggling again, moving your hips, he feels your heat against his cock over his jeans, making him throb then. He was no virgin, far from it, but you make him blush. You make him tremble, and he hates this effect, that you so casually have, and don’t even know you possess.

Since he met you, you’ve done things to him, things that have him jerking it to images of you, memories of you. Practicing all the ways he’d take that virginity of yours back in the day, knowing he was a fucking idiot. Thinking of how he’s stretch that surely tight little hole, how he’s make you his.

But you dated boys, he dated girls.

You lived your life in your lane, he lived his.

You both rarely crossed, aside from your friendship with his brother and mutual friends, he doesn’t think he’d see you. He barely does now, and the way you’re looking at him addles his mind, short circuits his brain chemistry. God the things he wants to do with you…

But…

“You’re trashed.”

“I’m pretty to you.” You murmur, lips far too close, he can practically taste jello shots on you.

“You are.” He figures fuck it, what’s it matter?

You won’t remember.

“You’re beautiful.” He says, finally, after so many years, and you blink rapidly, sobering up almost it seemed, lashes casting shadows on your cheeks as they lower, as you take a breath.

“You think so?” You whisper.

“I know so, fuck who doesn’t?” He holds you still when you wiggle. “Don’t fucking do that, please.”

“Don’t wanna fuck me, Kuna? Don’t you fuck whoever?”

“Fuck you…” He trails off. Fucking you isn’t what he’d do, and he damn well knows it too well.

He’d lose himself in you.

“You wanna fuck me so bad, hmm?” He asks, husky voice breaking.

“What do you think?” You grind on him, his head falls back, moaning as you kiss up his throat, making his hands grip you bruising. “Haven’t I wanted to for s’long, Kuna… wanted y’inside me…”

“Shut the fuck up.” He shoves at you again, ruby eyes narrowing as he looks at your flushed cheeks and glittery eyes. “You’re drunk.”

“So?”

“So you need to get home. Nobara.” She looks up at the shout of her name, eyes wide when she sees you, gently pulling you now.

“Come on baby.”

“No, he wants me, look at him.” You giggle again, and Nobara can’t stop the smirk on her face.

“He does, but… you’re too tired, yeah?” You look at her, then Sukuna, yawning then and nodding as she eases you up.

“Am I?”

“You are. Say goodnight, remember you can’t stand Sukuna, yeah?”

“Oh yeah.” You blink again, stumbling against your friend, Sukuna’s hand cups your face gently.

“Good night, drunk brat.” He kisses your head, shocking you even in your drunk state, before looking at Nobara. “Got a ride?”

“Yeah, we’re good. Sukuna…” She whispers then.

“Hmm?”

“Just let her go if you don’t want to be with her. She deserves more than this… pining away for you.” Sukuna gulps at Nobara’s words.

“I…”

“She’s amazing, you know.”

“Yeah, I fucking know. Trust me.” She sighs, as you snuggle to her, blissfully unaware of the conversation, just mumbling how good Nobara smells.

“She wants to go to another university, but she’ll go here to see you. Let. Her. Go.” Sukuna watches you stumble away, feeling it like a knife to his chest.

God it was difficult to let you go, but were you wasting your chances for someone like him?

*****

“I literally don’t remember it…” You murmur softly then, while Sukuna’s fingers run lazily over your shoulders, sipping more water. “I think I remember sitting on your lap but it’s a blur?”

“Yeah, it was… hard…”

You’re laughing then. “Sorry!”

“Hard in many ways, sure. To turn this down?” You heat up under his praise now, so open for you.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Look at you.” You’re kissing him then, again, you could just keep kissing Sukuna, forever and ever you feel like. Like nothing could rip you from him, when you’re straddling his lap like that night, and he’s exhaling against your lips.

“What was the thing you should’ve said?” You whisper, rolling your hips, grinding your pussy on his shaft, he groans, kissing down the plump curve of your breast, sinking his teeth and making your head fall back.

“I did say it…” He grins, looking at the little teeth marks in your skin.

“Wh-what was it?”

“That you’re beautiful, and fuck you are.” You whimper when he yanks down your top, revealing your puffy nipples, taut and perky with want. “Oh my… fuck…”

He’s sucking one into his hot mouth now, your hands entangled in pastel locks, hips rocking for more and more, he’s dying to sink into you, and you’re dying for him to fill you. “Thank you, Kuna… and… did I say anything that…”

“You kept saying how hot I am.”

“You are, fuck you are. Sexiest man I’ve seen.”

“Damn, simp much?”

“Hate you!” You shove at him and he’s chuckling, kissing back down your breasts, sighing.

“You don’t hate me, shut it. Should we put that mouth to better fucking use?” He asks, and you nod eagerly. “You’re gonna obey that easily? Want it so bad?”

“Oh fuck you and your stories.” You slip down, one knee on one side of him, as you unzip him slowly, he hisses when his cock juts out of the jeans, of his boxers, so heavy and thick. You pause briefly, blushing when you see it, a tattoo around the base of his fucking cock, and a piercing on the tip.

“Cat got your tongue, slut?”

“Slut? You have a slutty tattoo on your slutty dick. And this? This…” You moan then, kneeling between his thighs spread, looking up at him so pretty then his heart flips in his chest, he’s as nervous if not more than he was when he was a virgin. Looking how beautiful you are, face resting on his thigh.

“Then put this slutty cock in your slutty mouth, huh?” You eagerly do as he says, taking him into your mouth slowly, teasing the piercing with your tongue, tasting his precum, salty and bitter, coating your tastebuds. “Mmgh, yeah, like that, pretty little whore.”

His words really should infuriate you, but you love it, jerking his hips up as you suck harder, faster, feeling his hands tighten in your hair, and god he’s losing his fucking mind, and it’s all because of you.

You love it, love the way he’s looking at you with lidded ruby eyes, as he fucks up into your mouth, alternating between gently cupping your cheek and shoving your throat down on his cock, all while looking at you. His eyes never leave your face, you hear his breaths, feel him tense. It’s intoxicating, feeling his cock swell and pulse in your mouth, feeling his eyes on you, watching you take him deep.

“So pretty, look at you, taking cock s’good. S’hungry for it, huh?” He’s mumbling now, trying to be so sure, so dominating of you, and he does, but he’s vulnerable, as your little fingers press against his thighs, as you’re sucking him so deeply. You breathe through your nose, feeling him get harder, impossibly harder, as you take him more and more.

Your cunt is pulsing around nothing, thinking of everything you’ve wanted, listening to him mumbling praise, watching that red streak from his cheeks to the tips of his ears. To make Sukuna blush was something so heady you couldn’t explain it, not as you keep sucking, as you slip his dress shirt up just a bit, revealing the hard, perfect planes of his abdomen.

“Fuck, you’re good at that, hmm?” He whispers, his eyes half lidded, his voice gruff and rough, so fucking sexy, and you moan around his cock, nodding. He’s so fucking big and it’s a struggle to take him all in, but you’re keep trying to, go even deeper, watching his breath hitch, his hips buck upwards. He keeps whispering your name until he yanks you off.

“Lemme suck you off, Kuna.” You plead, and he laughs insanely now, shaking his head as he looks down at you.

“Ya gotta be that good at this!? I’m mad you ever sucked anyone.” He grumbles, glaring now, you pout as he pulls you off, hands firm on your ass when he sits you back on him, and now he’s adjusting himself back in.

“Really!? Not another story, Kuna… I need to tell you my own shit.” You murmur, he puts a finger to your lips, shaking his head.

“I’m almost done, last story yeah? Then…” He rubs your cunt over your panties, so damp they’re sticking to your plump lips pathetically. “Then I’ll make her feel so fucking good, so good I promise.”

“You suck.” You say with a pout, earning another smirk as you try to catch your breath, leaning back against him. “Okay, one more, and only one.”

“You’re such a little-”

“Kuna…”

“A little… pretty ass bitchy ass-”

“Sukuna, I swear to god I’ll hit you.”

“Yeah?” He raises a brow.

“You’re a little bitch.”

“Swear to-”

“I should go.”

“You aren’t going any fucking where. C’mere.” He yanks you back down, as you huff in anger. “I’ll give her what she needs, have some patience. All fuckin night and day, just wait a little longer, huh?”

“F-fine.” You look down demurely, as Sukuna sighs, shutting his eyes.

“The last time we saw each other. Remember?”

“Shit…”

*****

The fifth time Sukuna tried to confess his feelings, your Sophomore year of college, his Junior (Kuna 21, Y/N 20)

You weren’t even in the same college as Sukuna, but you still saw him, from time to time. You were close with Yuuji, Megumi and Nobara, and that meant sometimes seeing Sukuna, a girl on either side of him as he’s throwing pong balls into cups, and everyone is cheering for him.

Jock Sukuna.

Frat leader Sukuna.

Asshole hoe ass Sukuna.

You resent him, you hate it but you do, he’s popular and still somehow a huge asshole, he hasn’t changed a damn bit and people fawned over him, girls were all lining up for their turn, all except you. You’re glad you went to a different university, even if you missed your friends, it means you got to miss him being such a whore blatantly in front of the world.

He kissed one, then the other, like they’re both his girlfriends, chuckling until he catches sight of you.

You.

You make his heart race, wanting to thump right out of his fucking chest, tightening it so bad he can’t breathe for a moment. You’re in this gorgeous little dress, too fancy and pretty for some stupid ass frat party. He watches the eyes of everyone on you avidly as you smile, starting to get surrounded by his curious frat brothers, making his murder instincts kick into high gear.

When would everyone figure out you’re his? Shit, when would either of you figure it out, that this is what it was?

That he was in love with you.

That he’s been in love with you, since the first day you ran into the hall, over ten years back, when you’d had hurt in your eyes and your lower lip trembled. Loved you every minute of every day, and every day he falls deeper and deeper into being an idiot, drowning you away with cheap beer and endless annoying girls. Girls he couldn’t care less about, but they were safe bets.

They weren’t you.

Your eyes catch his across the room, sipping on your drink then, smiling up as your friends come to talk to you. Sukuna has maybe seen you three times this entire year, and he’d be lying if he said he doesn’t miss, god he misses picking on you, he misses that scowl you give him, the way you cross your arms.

He leaves the girls next to him, much to their dismay, walking up to you now, and your lips part as your drink sits just a bit down by your side, looking up at him with eyes that haunt his every fucking dream. Your body looks so good he can’t help but picture it naked in every position under him, while he says your name softly.

“Hey, Sukuna.” You manage to sound casual, while he’s shirtless, his already chiseled body buffer than you remember, tattoos already on his abdomen and wrists, ones that weren’t there before, that just make him sexier.

Fuck Sukuna.

Fuck him for being all you think about even now, when you have college, a part time job, a whole life. And you lay there, and think of him, picture him in ways that make you touch yourself, not knowing he’s jerking it in his dorm room to you, sometimes simultaneously, but of course neither of you has figured any of it out.

Clueless.

“You should… play?” He suggests, your brows draw together in confusion.

“Why are you being friendly?”

“Why shouldn’t I be?” You sigh then, shaking your head and walking away, making his jaw clench. “Excuse me?”

“You’re excused.” You stomp away, and Sukuna chases you, into a room now, shutting the door behind you, you peek around and realize you’re somehow in his room when you see the familiar things you’ve seen his whole life. His game system, his guitar… his collection of panties? “Jesus.”

“Yeah it’s a thing we do.” He clears his throat, rubbing the back of his neck, and you shake your head, turning to look up at him.

“Does it make you feel cool? Fucking the cheerleading squad?”

“Maybe it does. What do you care!?”

“I don’t.”

“Good.” He says.

“Good.” You agree, then you’re on each other, kissing each other hungrily, his hands gripping your ass, as you drink his moans.

“Why do you gotta act like this?”

“Like what, not easy?” You whisper, pulling back, and he groans, down on his knees suddenly, making you gasp, as he’s just a breath away from your hot, eager little pussy, lifting your skirt and moaning when he sees the damp spot. “What… are…”

“Lemme finally shut you the fuck up, brat.” He whispers, yanking them to the side just as the door tumbles open, you jerk back so fast as giggling girls pour in. “Don’t… get off me, fuck.” He’s shouting your name, chasing you, but you can’t get out of there fast enough.

What were you about to do!?

“Come back, fuck!” He’s yanking you by your wrist, and you scowl up at him. “Just let me… we’ll get a room, or…”

“No, thank god they came in. I’m an idiot, I have been. Down to be a notch in your stupid bedpost.”

“You’d never be-”

“Good bye Sukuna.” You leave him with watery eyes and a trembling lip, and he hates you more.

*****

You both sit there, staring at each other then, quietly, so much left unsaid over so many years, so much between you both. Your breaths make both of your chests rise and fall, while you wait with bated breath, feeling every bit of his energy consuming you, still tasting him on your lips, his pants still unzipped, your dress still tugging down your breasts just so.

“I was harsh.”

“Nah, you were real with me.”

“What did you want to say, then?” You ask quietly, and Sukuna curses, standing then, walking you back more and more until your shoulder blades hit the cool glass of his window, and you gasp, looking up at him. His gaze is hungry, it’s intense, looking right through you, seeing you. All of you.

“What I should have said, so many times… is that… I fucking love you, okay? In love with you. Stupid in love. Down bad like a little bitch.”

“What!?”

“You really couldn’t fucking tell!?”

You try to process his words, shaking your head now, tears welling up as the emotions hit you. “Like… in love?”

“Didn’t I say it, brat? Ya want some one knee shit, it’ll be eating your pussy, like I should have that night.” He murmurs, and soon he’s kissing you, hungry, desperate, hands touching every inch of you he can. “Love you, brat. Always have.”

“Sukuna…”

“Shh.” He turns you then, unzipping your dress, big hands darting across your back, your waist, your hips, turning you then to face him, leaving you in nothing but soaked panties and a lacy bra. “Should’ve told you, I love you. You’re beautiful, so beautiful you fucking wreck me.”

“Kuna…” He’s moaning again, red eyes bright as he rips your bra off, revealing your pretty breasts to his hungry gaze, cupping them, resting his forehead on yours.

“I was a fucking ass to you, a dick. A bully. A shit.”

“Kuna…”

“Shut up. You don’t have to feel the same, it can just be a fuck if you want, I’ll give you anything.” You’re whimpering, when he’s kneeling, just like that night, his breath hot against your inner thigh, when he runs calloused fingers down your soft skin, eliciting a cry. “I’ll let you fuck my face and thank you, make me so pathetic.”

“Sukuna!” You shout finally, yanking at his hair, pulling his head back to look at you, and he exhales now.

“Yeah?”

“I love you too, you idiot.” He pauses, heart slamming in his chest, and you just nod weakly, tears pouring down your cheeks. “I’ve always loved you, mean ass.”

“Fuck…” He rips your panties off.

“They’re expensive!”

“I’ll buy you all the ones you want, slutty fucking brat. Put this pretty pussy on my goddamn face, now.” He orders, lifting a thigh, swiping a stripe up your slit with the flat of his tongue, making you scream out, head falling back against the window he’s so shamelessly eating you out against. “Taste so goddamn good, fuck you.”

“F-fuck you, Kuna… just… will you… ah!” He smacks your pussy then, glaring up at you, as you manage a little pathetic scowl.

“Shut it brat, now. Lemme take my time, shit.” He’s back down there, parting your plump lips, dying at just how pretty your pussy is, how the wetness is just oozing. He sips up the syrupy wetness with the tip of his tongue, moaning at your taste, before slipping up to your clit, slowly circling.

“Mnph!” You’re barely able to make a noise, when Sukuna buries his face against you, nose bumping your little twitchy clit, tongue slipping up into your hole, as his hands squish your thighs, pinning you in place. “Ah!”

You feel that grin against you as he sips you up, drinking you, youre eyes are rolling, back, fucking toes curling as he nips your clit then with his sharp teeth, eliciting a slutty moan from your throat. “That’s it, cum all over m’face, slutty lil fuckin brat.”

You can’t even retort, you can’t function when his tongue is flicking the underside of your clit, and he’s watching you with those bright red eyes under those pastel lashes, working you so well you can barely stand. You’re gasping, gripping his hair so hard you’re pulling it, only making his cock harder for you, your eyes shut when you earn another wet smack on your cunt.

“Ah-ah,look at me when I’m eating you out, brat. I wanna see you fall apart f’me, just me, only me.” Sukuna’s possessive words and another smack earn you looking down at him, eyes locking with his. “Ha, that’s it.”

His tongue is flicking and pressing against your clit, when he curls two fingers up inside your gummy walls, cum drooling down his black painted nails, all the way to his rolex watch, cold against your heated skin as he pumps and pumps. “M’gonna… oh my g-god…”

“That’s it, cum like a pretty lil’ fuckin whore, hmm? Just f’me.” He orders, filthy words spitting from his mouth when he curls his fingers just so inside your soppy little cunt, and you shatter then as he works you like he’s always known you, sucking your little clit in his hot mouth.

“Kuna!” You scream out his name as you come, thighs trembling around his neck, eyes rolling back in your skull, panting when he fucks you with his fingers even faster, pushing you from one orgasm into another. “Too much!”

He doesn’t relent, he’s fingering and devouring you simultaneously until you’re a weak, pathetic mess, sweat making your hair stick to your brow, you’re trembling and shaking as it makes you see stars. You’re not even holding yourself up anymore, he’s got an arm around your hips, moaning against you.

“Sukuna, I l-love you.” You mumble weakly, and he chuckles, tickling your oversensive cunt.

“I know you do, baby.” He whispers back, kissing your inner thigh, licking your pussy clean of all your cum before he stands, and you’re taking off his dress shirt with shaky fingers, so shaky he smacks at them. “Can’t even function huh?”

“F-fuck off…” You can’t function, though, you can’t form a coherent thought in an already fucked out brain as he rips off that damn shirt, showing a buff, perfect body, littered in new tattoos you haven’t even seen. He’s quick to get naked, and pick you right up in his arms like you’re nothing. “H-here!?”

“Everyone already got a show.” He smirks, tip nudging your soppy entrance, you’re shivering as you cling to his shoulders, whining desperately. “Wanna give em a better show? Want everyone to see you dripping my cum?”

“Yes.” At your husky admission he grins.

“Slutty little brat. Oh my… fuck…” He can’t take it, when he starts to press inside you, and you’re screaming out at the stretch, as he feels your slick cunt grip him like a vise. “You’re s-so f-fucking…”

“Fuck me, please, please.” You beg, tears in your eyes now, and Sukuna won’t deny you shit, not when you’re begging so pretty, no he fucks into you, hard, thrusting his cock so deep his tip kisses your cervix. “Oh my god.”

“Oh my god.” He moans right with you, exhaling as he looks into your glassy, dilated eyes, so dilated all he sees are the outer rings of your irises when he sinks so deep in your eager pussy. “Ya feel like this, the whole time could’ve been putting babies in this?”

“Kuna!? The f- y-yes! Yes!” You’re screaming as he pounds his cock, so thick it’s stretching you out so hard it hurts, it burns, wearing you down with each pump, the sounds of your slutty cunt echoing in his immaculate fucking penthouse. You’re cumming before he can play with your clit, something that’s never happened, he hits so hard you don’t even need it.

When you cum, pulsing all around him he tenses, pulling then, setting you on the floor and turning you, pressing your tits against the glass as he bends down, lifting your ass up and fucking into you, your hands leaving prints on spotless glass. He’s moaning as his muscles flex, as he pumps his thick, long cock so deep, and you’re throwing your head back, screaming.

“That’s it, again baby, lemme feel your slutty fucking cunt grip me.” He huffs, leaning over the glass and fucking into you, two hands gripping your hips, thumbs pressing into the dimples of your back, as he rails you harder and harder. You’re gasping, twitching, unable to even stand, practically falling on the glass overlooking the night sky.

When Sukuna’s gotten another orgasm, he pulls out again, carrying you like you’re nothing until you’re in his bed, and he’s climbing on top of you, so intimate in this moment, cock drooling with your drippy wetness. He’s entwining a hand with yours, the other grabbing his cock, putting it back inside, your already sore little hole, and you gasp, clinging to him.

“S’good… s’good I…” You can’t form a word, when he’s pressing your thighs up higher and higher, watching the bulge in your tummy at his huge cock wrecking you, making him harder, his precum pouring, cock twitching.

“That’s it, cunt screamin’ just f’me, fuckin’ hear it huh?” Sukuna whispers, eyes and face practically feral, fucking you harder, deeper, as he presses your thighs until you’re folded in half under him. “Answer me, huh? Too fucked out?”

“F-fuck… y-you… K-Kuna you- yes!” You’re whimpering out when he pounds his cock even deeper, and you hear it, the squelching wetness of your soaking cunt, the slap of his balls on your ass, as his face drips sweat right down onto your own, and you’re crying it feels so good.

“Crying sexy!? Is anything ya do not sexy… slutty brat… swear I’ll ruin you for fuckin anyone, yeah?” You just nod weakly, sniffling when Sukuna cups your face between his huge hands, pounding deeper and deeper in your hole, and he’s finally slowing, laughing. “Milking me?”

“Whass that… Kuna…” Your words are jumbled as the man you’ve loved forever beats your poor little cunt up, as he fucks velvety walls until they’re aching, rubbing your walls so good, hitting just that fucking spot, over and over, ridge of that drooly tip sending you.

“That’s it, can’t help yourself, can you? So pathetic, c-can’t stop cummin…” He’s huffing now, leaning over you, so big and strong you feel so damn tiny under him, his power, the way he moves, the way he fucks you like he owns your pussy.

“Ngh…” You can’t speak anymore, it’s all sounds, whines, whimpers.

“Gonna fill this pussy up, gonna be dripping me for days huh? Want me to, don’t ya brat?” He holds your thighs up so high you could hardly breathe, as he works your cunt harder, grinding against you when his tip bruises your cervix. “Answer me, now, use those words.”

“Fill me, please.” You whisper, and he moans, smirking then, leaning so that his lips are a breath away.

“Want me to breed that slutty pussy?”

“Yes.” Sukuna folds then, busting so deep in your cunt, filling you to the brim with his endless spurts of hot cum, until you can’t stand it, so hot and full, you feel Sukuna fucking everywhere. He’s still pumping now, kissing you, moaning his pleasure as your thighs shake against him.

“That’s it, taking it so good aren’t ya baby? Cunt so eager. Slutty.” You just nod weakly, and he laughs. “That's how I shut you up? Could have been doing it.”

“You love my mouth.” You counter, earning his chuckle, when he finally eases your thighs down, kissing you just a bit softer, your nails that have been pressing and leaving marks on his back relaxes now, as you both breathe together, slower and slower.

“I do love it.”

“You love me.”

“Don’t get too annoying about it.” You giggle, and he adores the way your nose scrunches. “Fucking cute.”

“Yeah?” He nods, finally admitting it, what’s been in his heart so long he doesn’t know how he handled it, the lightness he feels of you knowing is so amazing he can’t put it in words.

“Yeah.” Is all he says for now, kissing you again. Soon he’s in the shower with you, ‘cleaning’ you, as he’s drinking your pussy right up on his knees, as the hot spray falls down.

Then, Sukuna is fucking you right on his shower wall, and you’re clinging to him desperately, as his cock works you in ways you could have never known. “Gonna forget anything, anyone, just me, brat.” He huffs in your ear.

Later, it’s no longer Valentine’s day, shit it’s maybe three am? But Sukuna isn’t done with your pussy, no he’s far from it, having you on your hands and knees on his bed as he fucks you, slapping your ass over and over, leaving hand prints. Then he’s prone bone over you, wrapping long fingers around your throat, squeezing as you gasp and cum all over his cock.

“Put a fuckin baby in ya, huh? Want that, don’t ya?” He’s huffing that morning, not like either of you have slept, and he’s laying behind you, you were supposed to cuddle but Sukuna has catching up to do with you, so he’s cradling you, fucking you with your one leg up over his thigh.

“Want it… want it…” You’re throwing your head back, while he’s fucking one load of cum out and pumping more into you, until you’re a sobbing mess, and Sukuna could still go, but you’re passing out, weak and snuggling him.

“You’re so… beautiful.” He whispers as you snore lightly, before rolling his eyes. “And annoying.”

“Hmm.” You mumble, when he shoves at you, and your eyes adjust to the man you’ve always loved, smiling just a little soft for a moment. “You love me.”

“Shut it brat. Stop snoring or I’ll kick you out.” You just giggle, kissing him.

“Shh. Love you Kuna.” You murmur, falling asleep on his chest, feeling for the first time in forever like the puzzle pieces have fallen together, and Sukuna watches you until his heavy eyes knock him out with you, snoring even louder than you. When you wake to him eating your pussy, all puffy and sore, you wonder just what you’re in for.

“Taste us, fuck.” He drinks you up, leaning over, spitting in your mouth then, you gasp at it, at his insane grin. “Taste s’yummy, huh?”

“How about g’morning, hmm?” You manage, coughing just a bit, and he’s nudging his broad shoulders back between your thighs.

“Nah, fuck that.” He buries his face against your pussy, your hands entangling in his messy locks, back arching.

“Please.” You whisper, soon he’s working over you, hand wrapping your throat, as he shoves that thick cock in your sore little pussy over and over, until you’re both losing the day in each other.

And that was the last time Sukuna tried to confess his feelings, but this time it worked, and you felt the same the entire time

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Art in the banner is from WynnChan270 on Deviant art- if you find them on tumblr plz lmk so I can credit here! <3

If you enjoy I'd love to hear your thoughts I put a lot on this onnne

[lelengerine]

pairing. chenle x shy!reader

synopsis. the one where your affection-starved boyfriend keeps asking you for kisses

tags. established relationship, purely fluff, no specific prns used for reader, lmk if anything was missed :D

wc. 0.8k

notes. this is heavily self-indulgent (again) and i have no excuses. why can't all men just be chenle im so srs 😞😞 also can we talk about the dreamies love me right stage like it was SO good (i am still here it is my roman empire),, anw likes and feedback are highly appreciated!

꒰ m.list ꒱

“babe, kiss please.”

chenle’s voice is light and teasing, as though the request is the most natural thing in the world. his lips are already puckered, his chin tilted upward just enough to let you know he’s fully expecting to get his way. his arms are sprawled comfortably on the couch, legs stretched out, one sock-clad foot nudging yours beneath the blanket draped over both of you.

you glance at him, already feeling the warmth creeping up your neck. his confidence is unshakable, and it’s maddening how he knows you so well—knows you’d never outright deny him, especially when he’s in one of these moods.

“but le,” you stammer, your voice slightly higher than usual, “that’s the tenth one today.”

your face is already flushed, the heat blooming across your cheeks as you avoid his gaze. you fiddle with the hem of the blanket, trying to appear unaffected, but the small, traitorous quiver in your voice gives you away.

“no one told you to keep count, baby,” he replies smoothly, his lips quirking into a grin that deepens the dimple on his left cheek.

“i know, but…” you trail off, words slipping away as he leans closer, his eyes locked on yours with that mischievous spark that always sets your heart racing.

“kiss?”

his voice is softer now, more of a coax than a command. the single word lingers between you, playful and persistent, as if daring you to resist. his proximity is overwhelming, the faint scent of his cologne that vaguely reminds you of fresh laundry mixing with the warmth radiating from his skin.

you shift slightly, trying to steady your breath, but the couch feels impossibly small. “le,” you murmur, barely audible, and your eyes flit nervously to the muted television.

he tilts his head, his dark eyes wide with mock curiosity. “hmm?”

the late afternoon sunlight streams through the windows, casting soft, golden patterns on the walls. outside, birds chirp faintly, their song weaving into the cozy stillness of the room. the scene is peaceful, but the fluttering in your chest is anything but.

“i just think…” you pause, your fingers curling tightly around the edge of the blanket. his presence is so close, so consuming, that forming coherent sentences feels like a monumental task. “i just think you’re doing this on purpose.”

his grin spreads wider, and there’s a twinkle in his eye that confirms your suspicions. “maybe i am,” he says, his voice low and lilting. his hand drapes casually over the back of the couch, fingers brushing lightly against your shoulder. “but what are you going to do about it?”

you puff your cheeks slightly in frustration, your lips pressing into a thin line. “you’re impossible,” you mutter, though your tone lacks any real bite.

“and you’re adorable,” he counters effortlessly, his teasing edge softening into something sweeter. his gaze lingers on your face, taking in every shy glance and nervous fidget.

the quiet stretches between you again, and for a moment, all you can hear is the rhythmic ticking of the clock on the wall. the weight of his attention feels heavy yet comforting, like a blanket wrapping around you.

“hey.”

you glance up at him hesitantly, and he takes the opportunity to tilt his head slightly, his expression now devoid of the teasing smirk. “you don’t have to if you’re uncomfortable,” he says, his tone sincere in nature.

the sudden shift in his demeanor catches you off guard, and your heart skips a beat. you realize then, with the way his gaze softens and his teasing fades into genuine care, that this is why you never deny him.

your hand hesitates, but eventually, you reach out to brush your fingers against his cheek. his eyes widen slightly in surprise before his grin returns, smaller this time but somehow warmer.

“okay,” you whisper, your voice so quiet you’re not sure he hears you until he leans in again, this time slower, giving you all the space in the world to pull away if you want.

but you don’t.

your lips press against his for the briefest moment, featherlight and shy, but it’s enough to make his heart swell. when you pull back, your cheeks are aflame, and you can’t bring yourself to meet his gaze.

“see?” chenle murmurs, his voice tinged with a mixture of pride and affection. “not so bad, right?”

you swat at his arm, grumbling under your breath, but he just laughs, leaning back against the couch with a contented sigh. “eleven,” you mumble after a moment, counting softly under your breath.

“what was that, baby?” he asks, feigning ignorance, though the grin tugging at his lips tells you he heard every word.

you glance at him from the corner of your eye, a small smile tugging at your own lips despite yourself. “that’s the eleventh one today.”

chenle chuckles, leaning over to press another quick kiss to your temple, his voice low and teasing.

“then make that twelve.”

[arannellahowlett]

How they kiss you (on the lips)

Kissing techniques of the 141 + König and Alejandro...with gifs!

Johnny "Soap" MacTavish

Johnny is all about the fun and spontinaity of it, you're on a drive? Oh he'll kiss you and watch the road. Little nips here and there, it wont take long for his mouth to go exploring...

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

Gaz is 100% sneaking up on you as you're doing the most mundane things and wrapping himself around you for a series of sweet kisses...this will rapidly spiral out of control and turn into a make out session, he has also been known to kiss you when you're lying on the couch or bed with your eyes closed, upside down Spiderman style...without hanging from the rafters.

Captain John Price

Listen, John is a passionate guy, he's going to literally envelop you in his arms, in a nice little, protective cocoon and kiss you with everything that he is. It's soft, its slow and he's going to savour it, now that's not to say that he doesn't get more rambunctious, but normal everyday kissing? Nice and slow.

Simon "Ghost" Riley

Oh boy, strap yourself in because for Simon, you get 2, because I feel like Simon has two modes...

Okay, so mode 1: every day Simon. The man just wants to love you and feel you around him, he is straight up picking you up, wrapping those big strong arms around you and just...being,

So let's say he's been or is being deployed, hell, he's just having a bad day (and let's be honest here, he has a lot of those.). This man wants to full on consume you. He is pouring everything that he is into these kisses, with a good grip on you so you can't escape, hell, he's even biting a bit. You're his reason for breathing, the blood in his veins and why he does what he does and he's making it known.

König

Okay, so hear me out, König is a big boy, so much so that you're either not able to reach, or he's straining his back, so his solution? He's straight up picking you up and you're either against the wall or at the mercy of his arms, his actaualy kisses are slow, somewhat timid at first but once he's kissed you once, he can't get enough of you.

Alejandro

Okay, you look at Alejandro and tell me if you see anything but passion from the man? He is straight up pulling you into his lap, his hands going everywhere, he starts off slow and gentle but it doens't take long before the man is absolutely consuming you.

[lostinlovingrevery]

Head Over Heels

Trilogy! Logan X F! Reader

Plot: You have a major crush on Logan, and decided he's too pretty to not paint

A/N: This is purely me just being a huge romantic. I also got a polaroid camera for christmas that i use to take pictures of everything so...

Warnings: None! This is pure fluff, Reader is just a huge romantic, and crushes on Logan big time. Mentions of the other X-men, taking pictures, painting?

Word Count: 1741

Golden sun rays

Dusty library books

Tall, broody, and handsome

You were observing a photo in your study at Xavier's School for the Gifted. You were a professor there, teaching classes such as mutant ethics, mutant history, and mutant biology. Anything with mutants, that was your job; and that was by day- by night, you were an X-man. You went on dangerous missions in the name of making the world better and safer for people. You were strong, intelligent, compassionate…

And a total romantic.

You loved love. Not just romantic love, but platonic love, familiar love. You loved art, religion, and politics. You found beauty in everything, even the mundane. It didn’t matter if you’ve gotten your heartbroken before, if you were ridiculed for your passion, you enjoyed life and what it had to offer. Was every day like that? No, but that’s okay, because it only made the good days sweeter.  

You carried a polaroid camera with you often. It allows you to take pictures of things whenever you want, things that strike your fancy. A pretty rose that bloomed in the garden, a sunset at the beach, Hank in his lab, Jean and Ororo painting each others nails, Scott glaring at the camera, students studying in the halls, a bird perched on the window sill, Charles in his office, a forgotten bottle of soda sitting outside-

And your most recent addition to the collection on your wall, a photo of the X-men's new-ish recruit, Logan Howlett, the big bad Wolverine. 

He arrived close to 6 months ago. To say you immediately crushed on him the moment he showed up was an understatement. Love at first sight- was probably a more accurate description of what happened. It wasn’t enough that you already thought he was extremely handsome, his lovely face with those mutton chops , that thick head of chestnut colored hair, his hazel eyes - sharp and fierce one moment - sweet and pretty the next. He had the body that you could only compare to a Greek God. 

The attitude though, when he opened his mouth, the attitude that pissed people off but only spurred you on. 

You were head over heels. Ororo teased you that you practically had heart eyes for the wild man whenever he was around.

You two quickly became friends- if you could describe it as that since Logan Howlett does still try to be a “cool guy”, acting suave and nonchalant, but you would quickly break through the barriers he’d set up. Not because of your little “crush”, but because you were a naturally welcoming person. You understood people, had the patience of a saint, and the confidence to not take shit. All perfect for dealing with the Wolverine. You saw right through him. The sarcasm and the cockiness he would sport.  As you grew to know him, your feelings turned less from a schoolgirl crush to something more serious deep in your soul, an ache to take care of him the way no one else has- the way he deserved. You felt he had the same feelings for you, the protectiveness that he had for you, the way he picked up on your habits and quirks, and how he always spoke just a bit more softly to you than he does to anyone else. Whatever was happening, was blossoming slowly- but surely.

Nonetheless, you weren’t going to rush anything. 

But, when you saw him in the library, standing near a dusty shelf lined with books no one has touched in years, he was staring out a window, arms crossed as he leaned against the wall, his expression soft and reflective, with golden rays of the evening sun highlighting his features, you thought it was one of the prettiest things you have ever seen. You could see the thoughtfulness in Logans face, a relaxed expression that is rarely spotted on the Wolverine- who normally is gruff, a frown always seemed to be permanently painted on his face. It so happened you had your camera on you, so you quickly snapped a photo- and took off before he looked in your direction, knowing that with his amplified hearing, he would have heard the click of the camera. 

The photo honestly captivated you, like a painting with the way the sun rays came in through the window. It highlights the warm color of his hair, the structure of his face, and the toned muscles of his arm. 

You used to paint all the time. It was a hobby you thoroughly enjoyed, as it relaxed you- allowing you to take in the small details, slow down, and appreciate the gentle strokes of the brush as you carefully choose the perfect color to paint onto the canvas. You’d paint the pictures you’ve taken if they had an impact on you- much like how the Polaroid of Logan was impacting you now. You hadn’t painted in a long time, the work of being a professor and an x-men left little time to enjoy the hobby that takes a lot of time.

Seeing though, as you had time now. Why not?

Digging out your old stand, and your paints and old brushes, and fortunately, you still had at least one bare canvas left, otherwise you would have likely covered one of your older paintings- which were still stuffed in the closet of your study, to use instead. An intense need to create and make something just as beautiful as Logan was in that photo.

Starting with the background, you found yourself back in your familiar style of painting, eyeing the colors of the photo. The color of the wall, the floors, and filled in the shadows and got the placement of the window juuuust right, and was just starting to work on the bookshelf that would be behind Logan. You’d been working on it for nearly an hour, your normally overactive brain had silenced itself to focus on your task.

You hadn’t noticed Logan walking in at first. He had been looking around for you and found that no one else had seen you in a while, which was odd- since you were a complete busybody- and you could be spotted easily all over the mansion. He went to your study, and found you by the window, staring intensely at a canvas before you, sitting on a chair with your legs criss-crossed. He walked up to you- not silently, only clearing his throat to announce his arrival once he was next to you.

Jumping at the sound of his voice, and turning to look at him, your hand quickly snatched the polaroid that was perched against the canvas so you can look at it for reference. Logan didn’t miss how you grabbed it, and snuck it under your thigh. He quirked a brow.

“What you working on bub?” 

“Oh…” You turned to look at the canvas, and a deep blush came across your cheeks. “Just…Painting.”

“I didn’t know you could paint.” He says, a small tone of interest in his voice, making you perk up a bit.

“I haven’t done it in awhile.” shrugging, and glancing at the canvas- and relieved you hadn’t worked on Logan's actual figure yet and suddenly very aware that you had been acting on impulse- wondering if it had been strange that you decided to just paint a picture of Logan after you secretly- but not so secretly took a picture of him earlier... “I just…got hit with inspiration I suppose.” 

“Yeah?” He glanced at it. “What are you painting?...” He observed it and you let him work the details out. “A window…that a bookshelf?” 

“Excellent observation skills Lo.”

He smirked. “You do anything specific with your paintings or just…whatever?”

“I paint things I find pretty.” You say simply tilting your head to look up at him. An expression came across his face- something you couldn’t quite gauge. 

“Oh yeah?” He says. He glanced at it again. His eyes trailed over back to you. “What's so pretty about this one?”

“You’ll have to find out.” You tittered. He quirked a brow, before looking back at the canvas. The way he kept observing it made you nervous. The gears in that beautiful head of his turning. Did he recognize it?

“Hey, you take any pictures today?” He asked with a casual tone.

Your smile faltered a bit, and you bit your lower lip, chewing on it nervously.

He’s on to you

“I took a few.” You answered- your very best to be nonchalant, but he could hear the slight waver of your voice. As he placed a hand on the back of your chair, he leaned down towards you, his chin tilted upwards but his eyes bore down at you, a small quirk of his lips. Your heart started beating faster at his close proximately, and he lowered his chin down, leaving you both nearly face to face. His eyes glanced at your lips. 

“Take any by chance in…the library?” 

You swallowed, unable to tear yourself away, as a warm heat came across your cheeks. As he got closer, unable to bring yourself to answer just then- but you felt he knew what it was. Your eyes traced over his lips, and you decided you weren’t going to hide it anymore. A smile grew across your lips, as you tilted your head up at him. Confidence filled your chest, 

“I did. Of something I thought was very pretty.” You say, looking him in the eyes. A sweet smile came across his face and he closed the space between you, softly pressing his lips to yours- a heartbeat passed, giving you a chance to pull away by some off chance he was wrong, but you eagerly returned the kiss. Turning your head softly to meet with him, your noses bumped together, and you began to giggle. Your whole self felt like butterflies as adrenaline ran through your veins at the fact that you were finally, finally, kissing him.  

You separated, and you felt like he just stole your breath; He didn’t look like he felt no different from you either. His lips, slightly parted, curved up into a smile, and brought a hand up to your chin, his thumb softly pressing to your bottom lip, as you looked up at him with bright, adoring eyes.

“You got that camera on you? I got something pretty I want to take a picture of too.”

[taabee]

Jealous little fish

Pair: Rafayel x Y/N reader

Warning: none, fem!reader, rafayel being cute and jealous, fluff stuff

If rafayel was regretting anything, it was the goldfish he had given you 3 months ago, as a gift to celebrate your move to his home. You had finally moved in with him, but if he could throw those fish down the toilet he would. But he couldn't, why?…because you wouldn't stop looking at them, taking care of them and even talking beautifully to them. ' You just talk nice to him' thought Rafayel, when Thomas tapped him on the shoulder and brought him out of his trance.

“Sir, we have to go now, or else we won't make it in time for the exhibition,” says Thomas. Rafayel was invited to an event, which he didn't want to go - . But he had to do it…somehow he had to generate money. “Yes I know…just give me 10 minutes” says rafayel, watching as thomas walks away and heads for the exit of the home. He approaches you, who was looking at her pets with great care and amazement. “baby?” rafayel speaks softly, trying to control his irritation. “mhhh?” you reply without taking your eyes off the fish. Rafayel takes a deep breath. “I'm going now…see you in a few hours” he says a little annoyed. You look at him, with a smile and move in for a kiss. But he turns his face away. For a moment, you were going to argue. But by his pout, and by the expression on his face. You can tell he's doing one of his tantrums. You stand a little on your toes, and give him a quick kiss on his cheeks. “Ok, enjoy yourself a lot, here I wait for you!!!” you speak, turning all your attention to your new pets.

Rafayel turns away quickly, even more annoyed. You didn't even ask him how he was, and why he refused your goodbye kiss. You simply ignored him. And if there was one thing Rafayel hated most, it was being ignored. He got into the car, where Thomas was waiting for him. And slamming the door very hard, “Start!” rafayel orders. Thomas says nothing, but laughs to himself. Rafayel was having a toddler tantrum right now. “When we leave the event, we'll buy a giant bowl of chlorine,” rafayel says. Crossing his hands and looking out.

The event ran smoothly, good business was done. But he kept looking at his phone all night. He was still waiting for you to text or call him.

Arriving home, Rafayel said goodbye to Thomas, telling him to go home and rest. Entering through the door, he saw that the lights were off. A few candles gave a quiet atmosphere. And only the light of the fish tank was the strongest. Giving a beautiful reflection, and something aquatic to the walls of his home. He had to admit that it reminded him of his old home…but there you were. Feeding your fish, as you turned to greet him.

“Hi love!!!” you run up to him, to wrap your arms around his neck. This time he wasn't going to deny you a kiss. Rafayel kissed you back, and moved his arms around your waist hugging you tightly over his body. “I missed you” he says softly, you can feel the weight of his head fall on your shoulder. “mmm you poor thing, you must be tired… but could you get more clients?” you ask, looking at rafayel for a moment, he had a tired smile on his face. “I have 12 clients…12 paintings to do” rafayel speaks, I feel you hug him.” Congratulations!” you snuggle more into his chest, both of you staying there for a moment.

“How about I set up the tub, and we take a long, relaxing bubble bath?” rafayel says, noticing how your eyes light up with joy. Both you and he needed to relax. “Perfect, go get everything ready…I'll go get something” you say, turning away from Rafayel, running towards his room. Rafayel chuckled a little, you didn't know what you were up to, but it was going to flow. Taking a quick glance at the fish tank, seeing how the fish were looking at him. “If you guys think you're competition for me…you're wrong” Rafayel speaks, as he begins to fill the tub. A tub that was in his own living room, a living room that was in his studio. Rafayel's house was complicated but beautiful.

“She will spend more time with you, but she prefers me,” touching the water to make sure it was good. Taking off his clothes, he laid them on the floor. “I'm going to cook you…and then” Rafayel hadn't noticed but you had already arrived in the room. You could see how he was arguing with the fish, and you didn't know how to react. “Rafa…” you speak, seeing how he looks at you with wide eyes. “Oh, my love…look, the tub is ready” Rafayel signals with his hands for you to join him. You shake your head slightly, ignoring what just happened.

Getting close to the bathtub. “Look…I bought these patches to reduce swelling. They're shaped like kitty whiskers” you show him the package, you were sitting on the edge of the tub. Rafayel makes a face, “I'm not going to use those” he says, while you pinch his nose a little. “Sure you are…they are good for you” you speak, as you get up to start removing your clothes. Rafayel adjusts a little, leaning back now on the edge of the tub. Enjoying the view. You may have lived just recently, but two years of relationship was more than enough for there to be that intimacy and trust that Rafayel so craved. He loved seeing you confident in front of him.

You take off your shirt, then your pants…and then proceed to take off your underwear. You glance at rafayel from time to time, he has a lovely look on his face…as if your whole being is a work of art, and he is just admiring it. “You are so beautiful” rafayel says in a low voice. “mmm do you think so?” you ask, as you step into the tub. Rafayel helps you a little, taking your hand. So that you can settle close to him. “Of course I do…every part of you, is a work of art” Rafayel comes closer to give you a soft kiss on the lips. “And so are you” you reply, nuzzling your nose with his. “Well…which one do you want?” you show him the packages, and rafayel has no choice but to accept. “I like this one,” he says, watching as you excitedly open the package.

About 20 minutes have passed, and you were lying on rafayel's lap, while playing with his hair, making him kitty ears with the help of the bubbles. While he simply enjoyed your attention. “You would make a very grumpy and scary kitty” you tease. “Ahh yes?” rafayel pulls you closer to him, tickling you a little. You both giggle in the process. The moment is interrupted when you hear a tapping of glass. You can see Rafayel pull away from you a little, and look back at the fish tank with a pout.

You laugh to yourself, but it was loud enough for Rafayel to hear. “Why are you laughing?” he asks, somewhat annoyed. “Are you jealous of …. some fish?” you look at him for a moment, you can notice how his cheeks turned red, and his face started to make that grimace he always did when he was on the edge of a tantrum. “No…how do you think!!!” he yells a little, letting go of you to cross his arms. He looked so adorable, fussing with his little kitty ears made out of bubble. You wanted to shower him with kisses. “Are you sure?” you tease him a little.

“Well…yeah, so what's up? Lately you're just looking at them, saying how cute they are and blah blah blah blah” rafayel explodes. You put your hand to your mouth, in order to control your laughter. “Don't laugh” complains rafayel, he was getting embarrassed by his behavior, but it was something he couldn't control. “Why do you think I would trade my great little merman for some fish?” you joke, moving closer to rafayel, so that your body lies fully on top of him. Wrapping your arms around his neck. Very close to his face, only to give him a soft kiss on his chin. “ They…ahhhh” he was frustrated.

You are silent for a moment, and trying to understand this sudden jealousy. He wasn't like that with other things…but with sea creatures. Rafayel felt that fish were competition for him…. you couldn't believe it. “They get all your attention, I just…I want your attention to be only for me,” Rafayel says, looking you in the eye. “Did I tell you that your eyes are beautiful?” you say suddenly. Seeing how rafayel's face breaks into a smile. “yes…about a thousand times” he laughs a little. As he hugs you closer. “I'm a fool, aren't I?” rafayel asks you.

“Yes, you are my dumbest little fish” you move in for a kiss, but rafayel stops you. Holding your chin with his hand. “Do you promise to love me forever?” he asks, you can see that look. One you had seen many times since you got together, always of fear and worry. “ Until eternity….even if you become a fish” you joke, and watch as he laughs. Catching your lips.

The fish stayed and the fish tank stayed in the same place….until eternity.

[ghostgirl-22]

i like the idea of patrick giving art hickeys. art lies to the other guys on the team, says they’re from various girls but everyone knows the truth. maybe patrick even tells them when art isn’t around

I like that idea too actually, thank you for sharing anon<33

(Whoa im not even gonna edit this…good luck everyone!)

CW: 18+ !NSFW! The S/m part of bdsm, if you squint

—-

Art bruises easily. It really shouldn’t be something that turns Patrick on…but it is. He bruises so, so easy. Every time Patrick thinks about it, his dick gets a little hard. Fingerprints on his waist, bite marks his shoulders, hickeys on his throat. He’s not sure if Art really believes him anymore when Patrick says he’s not doing it on purpose.

God.

It’s so fucked up but he barely has to do anything, barely has to bite, barely has to squeeze and little pink-purple marks bloom vividly everywhere. The bruises don’t even stick around, they’re fading almost as easy as they come. Turning pale pink as the blood beneath them disappates before they turn white and disappear. But when they’re there, when they’re fresh, it’s so fucking delicious.

Especially because Art is so goody goody, so strait laced, so careful and controlled and put together. Patrick kinda loves just unraveling him. Sex so good that it makes him forget how to behave himself. Forget they’re doing it in public, forget his grandma is down the hall, forget all decorum. Mostly he forgets to make Patrick stop sucking visible evidence that he’s not a perfect angel into his skin.

Sometimes it’s so obvious… like the other day in class when their English professor noticed “fun night last night?” And then his ex girlfriend noticed. She scrunched her nose up irritated. Patrick can’t help it, he was giddy watching Art try to hide it the rest of the day. Skin all flushed, anxious that everyone was aware of what he’s been up to.

He gets so anxious for it, tells Patrick he’ll mark him back if he doesn’t stop. Patrick promises he will. But it’s not his fault…Art is just so fragile. Especially when he’s… pressed up against the wall taking Patrick’s cock because he couldn’t wait for the bed. Or when he’s on his knees in the back of the movie theater swallowing as much as he can while Patrick’s running his popcornbutter covered fingers through golden blond curls. Patrick doesn’t even mean to mark him. Not really. He just kinda wants everyone to know that this is his.

Patrick’s favorite thing is when their teammates tease Art about it.

It’s one of the last nights of an away tournament and most of the varsity team has gathered in Everett Moore and Lindsay Jefferson's hotel room, because Lindsay happens to be number one singles player and team captain (and he also happens to come from the richest family on campus. One doesn’t necessarily have to do with the other but Patrick knows he’s technically a better player. Hell, Art might even be better but that’s neither here nor there). When they meet up, someone usually sneaks in alcohol or weed and they watch movies or play music, while shooting the shit and discussing previous and upcoming matches and opponents.

They’re all spread out across the room, on the floor, on the beds. The tv is on with the volume low, red solo cups all over the place and two bottles of rum and three two liters of Pepsi are on the dresser. Along with three nearly empty boxes of pizza and a stack of unused paper plates.

As a team they often pick on each other, it’s not just Art. But Patrick’s favorite is when the attention shifts to Art because he gets even more interesting than he already is.

“Donaldson, that one looks fresh?” It’s Scott Jefferson, Lindsay's little (by 10 months) brother, normally everyone blows him off because he’s the youngest on the team. But Lindsay is amused.

“It does look like a new one, who’s been kissing you?” He chimes in.

Art waves it off. “Uh it’s not that new… you just couldn’t see it under the um… my uniform.” He lies. Because it is new, brand, brand new. Patrick did it last night when Art crawled into his bed because the air conditioner wasn’t working and it was too hot. Then it got hotter. They had to take a cold shower after. Art was all pouty when he noticed it in the morning.

“This one is fading, time for a new one,” Alex Kim, who’s right next to Art on the floor, touches at what Patrick knows is a sensitive spot. Art squirms and shifts his shoulder up towards his ear. Alex bites down on a smile and scoots closer to him.

”I thought Shannon broke up with you,” Everett points out, from his spot next to Patrick on the bed.

“She did, I’m— I’m seeing another girl. She’s—“Art gestures vaguely. “She doesn’t go to MRTA.”

“Where does she go?” Someone else asks.

“Yeah who’s this mystery girl, she’s a bit of a freak isn’t she? Marking you up,” Patrick chimes in, grabbing another slice of pizza and then settling back on his spot on the bed.

Art glares at him and then rolls his eyes. “Piney Brook, the all girls school.” He says and he takes another drink.

“What’s her name? One of us might know her,” Alex asks. He’s trying to poke at the hickey and Art shrugs him away. Patrick knows Alex is one of a handful of their teammates who would fuck Art if he got the chance. And maybe it’s because Patrick’s jealous, maybe it’s because he’s a little possessive (he can’t stop leaving little marks all over Art after all) but he told Alex about it, Alex and his doubles partner and roommate, Corey. Corey who cant keep his big fucking mouth shut to save his life. So everyone already fucking knows. But they love to tease Art anyway. See if he’ll admit it.

“She’s- she’s new, I doubt any of you losers would know her,” Art continues to lie.

“Is she here now? Or did you cheat on her?” Callum Harrington pipes up. “Cause that definitely wasn’t there yesterday.”

“He’s a fucking cheat,” Alex teases and Corey snorts a laugh.

“I didn’t cheat,” Art’s cheeks are pinkening, god, Patrick can feel himself getting hard, he’s gonna give him another one. “What about you, Harrington? You had a big one a few weeks ago.” Art says, deflecting.

“When my girl does it, she lets me borrow her make up to hide it. But mostly it’s me sucking hickies on her neck,” Callum says.

“Please, look how pale he is, he probably gets kissed and then it’s turning red,” Everett points out.

“Or poked,” Alex teases, nudging him. Art hiccups, nudging him back playfully before he takes another drink, determinedly not looking in Patrick’s direction.

“You want another hickey, Donaldson? I could give you plenty.” The openly gay kid Jesse Newman asks.

That makes a couple of them laugh and Jesse smirks in Patrick’s direction.

“Guys, come on,” Art says, uncrossing his legs. “Can we talk about something else, I don’t want to um… she’s really private.”

“Private but she’s claimed you publicly,” Lindsay smirks.

“I just… I do bruise a lot. Wait um— you mean this right?” He touches the hickey. “I actually just slept bad that’s nothing.”

“Oh I bet you sleep bad a lot,” Jesse says.

“I do kinda,” Art says, shyly.

“Does he, Zweig?” Lindsay asks.

“Oh absolutely,” Patrick smirks and a few of the guys chuckle.

Art is clearly relieved when the topic shifts away from hickies to Jesse’s birthday party. He’s still flushed for the alcohol, drinks way too much and lets Alex massage a cramp in his calf. All while making these soft little relieved moaning sounds that no one else probably notices but are driving Patrick crazy. Sounds Alex will probably run home and masturbate to. And he wonders why Patrick needs to mark him. He probably thinks Patrick’s not paying attention because he’s talking a lot but he’s always paying attention to Art.

It’s when someone inevitably rents a porno off HBO and Lindsay and Everett get pissed because they’ll likely be in trouble with the coaches, is when the party ends. And Patrick’s guiding Art back to their room, Art is silly drunk and horny. Doesn’t even pretend to get in his own bed. Just climbs in with Patrick. And he sighs contentedly, his body all sticky wet with lube and come as Patrick licks and nibbles at his throat, a new one already blooming.

[veephoenix]

n.s. one shot

A quick something I wrote as a tiny wave of inspo kicked in while I was staring at those new pictures in the studio. No trigger warnings. Just fluff and an implied sexual scenario at the end. I might give it a title later. | Words: 700aprox.

There’s something about the silence in the studio once it empties out—when the boys abandon their instruments, the machinery, and the space sinks into an almost sepulchral quiet, where the musical notes that had been filling the air just minutes earlier are relegated to a nonexistent plane.

As much as I love being there to offer them my support and watching them strive minute after minute to achieve that near-perfection they’ll showcase in front of thousands of people hours later, there’s nothing like finding yourself standing in the middle of an empty studio.

The remaining daylight still filters through the tall windows, and the human warmth of the team lingers between the stone walls. If I try hard enough, I can visualize the boys there, each in the position they’ve been in all morning. I can see Noah in the center, behind the stand, holding his mic, his lips brushing the casing in almost the same way they brush against my skin when he kisses me and we make love.

I don’t realize I’m smiling. I glance over my shoulder to make sure I’m alone, and once I confirm it, I drop my backpack onto the floor, over the Persian rug, take off my shoes, and sit cross-legged. From my bag, I pull out a notebook and a pen. I lift my gaze once toward the view outside the windows, and a moment later, I’m writing words onto the paper, drawing lines, creating something like poetry that Jolly will probably tweak and turn into the lyrics of a song.

I suppose at this point, some might be wondering where I am while they gather in the hotel lobby deciding where to go for dinner. I’m far from there, both physically and mentally. Minutes slip away, and so do the hours.

By the time the light turns golden, signaling the sunset, I’m lying on my stomach on the rug, my socked feet in the air, brushing against each other as I continue writing and nibbling on my lip, searching for the most fitting word to end this poem—if you can call it that.

When the air shifts, I don’t notice because I’m so absorbed in my own world and the warmth of the studio, though I should have recognized that familiar sensation—that feeling that tells me my favorite human is occupying the same space as me.

I don’t notice his footsteps as he approaches because he’s careful not to break my moment, and because he wants to surprise me—which inevitably means that once he’s within reach, he can’t resist the urge to touch me and he'll break my momentum. His hands catch one of my ankles in the air, making my heart leap in my chest, and when I look over my shoulder, my eyes meet his, and suddenly, I’m grinning like an idiot.

Noah pulls off my sock, and an instant later, he’s leaning down to kiss the inside of my ankle. I scrunch my nose.

“Don’t do that,” I say, feeling coy. “I walked here from the hotel. I need a shower.”

Noah releases my ankle and straightens up, raising his eyebrows. “What do you mean? Are you saying your feet smell bad? Because all I smell here is Thai food.”

For a moment, I don’t get the joke. Then Noah wiggles his eyebrows suggestively toward a sturdy wooden desk behind him. There are a couple of paper bags.

This time, it’s my eyebrows that shoot up as my eyes widen.

“I thought we could have dinner here,” Noah announces, glancing quickly at the food and then shrugging, still watching me as I remain lying on the floor. “Just you and me.”

It’s things like this that make me love him so much.

And the only way I know how to show him this love is by accepting what he offers me—his food and his care.

I hurriedly gather my things while Noah pulls containers out of the bag and hands me a plate of pad thai, still warm and smelling of lemongrass and other spices I can’t identify. Noah sits in front of me, also cross-legged, and together we devour the food, practically in silence.

After a while, my hands find their way to his body, because there’s not a single day I can spend too much time in his presence without touching him, without feeling the brush of his skin against mine.

I value the time I spend alone creating art, but there is no masterpiece more wonderful than him and the way he loves me.

[corkinavoid]

Obsessed With You by Cosmicandy

Theater gothic/Phantom of the opera

(For some horrific reason I couldn't think of a trope)

DPxDC Phantom in the Opera

9/2 sat

Went to Gotham City Opera to see Eugene Onegin with B & Dames. The performance sucked ass (as modern takes on classics usually do), but during Tatyana's aria, some tech guy dropped a rubber chicken from catwalks right on stage. I bet it was on purpose since the lead's voice sounded much similar to the sound that chicken made. Wish I could shake the dude's hand, that was truly the crescendo of the whole scene.

15/2 sun

Came by GCO on the way to WE. Had some time to spare, so decided to go in and find the rubber chicken guy to thank him for the laugh last week. Thought he might appreciate the positive feedback since he was defo yelled at for the stunt. Turns out everyone blames it on a 'ghost'. Using 'Phantom of the Opera' as a cover story is poor taste, in my opinion, but on the other hand, it worked, and who am I to judge.

17/2 mon

Got curious and pulled up the records of GCO employees. No one matches the guy I've seen on the catwalks.

18/2 tue

Blackmailed Damian into drawing the guy. No match through the face recognition program. Should have expected that, really; the one cute guy with a sense of humor I meet (or see, actually), and he doesn't exist.

20/2 thur

Can't stop thinking about the rubber chicken guy. Might have to go back to GCO and ask about the whole ghostly rumor. Last time, no one bat an eye at the 'ghost' excuse, now that I think about it. Has it happened before? Is it a go-to explanation for any prank no one wants to take credit for?

26/2 wed

Visited GCO at night. Seen the guy, but the cam footage came back corrupted when checked downstairs. So maybe the fact that his hair was floating and glowing in the dark was not a hallucination.

27/2 thur

Definitely not a hallucination! Good news: got a sample. Bad news: after analysis, the data also came back corrupted. Weird news: the hair keeps glowing even after it's been cut off.

2/3 sun

The guy's name is Danny. Ghost story confirmed. I'm having a crisis.

4/3 tue

I'm not sure if I want to know absolutely everything there is to know about him or I want to forget everything I've already learned. But then, I've already got so far. Might as well commit to the bit?

8/3 sat

Was invited to see La Traviata tomorrow. Can I still call that reconnaissance, or am I in date territory?

10/3 mon

...it was a date. On an entirely unrelated note, Teddy Hyde ruined all my attempts at coming prepared.

18/3 tue

Heard a new rumor among GCO staff members. They suspect the ghost in their opera is having a crush on Red Robin. Not sure where they've got that idea, but it sure took them some time to notice.

19/3 wed

Damian keeps staring at me at dinners. Maybe I should take that portrait of Danny that he did down from the wall over my bed.

22/3 sat

Going on a date today, and this time, it's definitely a date! Feels like I should be having a crisis over dating a ghost, but somehow, I'm only having a crisis over outfit choices.

61/0° gBs

hEy, yoU're keEEpinG a DIary¡ aboUt Me!¡ ThAt"s cuTe FUCK OFF DANNY THIS IS PRIVATE INFORMATION GET OUT heHeheEhe no~

~•~•~•~

The thing is, I loved the song. And I loved the aesthetic. And I had such a goddamn hard time figuring out how to fit them together; I went through at least three different setups before deciding fuck it imma write silly boys being silly and wish for the best.

Dare I say it turned out cute as fuck, even though I still missed the mark on theater gothic aesthetic for the most part. Anyway, have a few pictures for general vibes!

[Just so you know, if you enter 'sex with a ghost' into google, the first few results will be the lyrics to 'Sex with a Ghost' by Terry Hyde, which is why Tim's research has been rather fruitless]

[archivalofsins]

There are a lot of things within Milgram that will look a lot different in hindsight. There are going to be a lot of people who may not have been there in the moment that will go why did the audience vote this way instead of that way etc.

How could none of them tell these people were bad?

The knee-jerk reaction of a lot of people who were there may be to get defensive and go well it was different in the moment. It was stressful and we were literally working against the clock. We only had three months. Plus, at times the day one verdicts for the prisoners were so decisive that most of those three months were spent getting them down from where they were at.

But like hear me out- Fuck that.

Yeah, I mean that. Fuck that shit. No one needs to explain the process to anyone else that comes trial three or after it. Milgram is a once in a lifetime media experience meant to be lived in the moment and looked at an entirely new way after that moment has ended.

Once hindsight finally sinks in fully that feeling of what one thought they knew conflicting with what they now know. Well that feeling is everything in a series like Milgram. A series where the characters relish in their lies, the swinging impressions and interpretations, revel in the idea of changing Es' and by proxy the audience's opinions on them.

They're throwing shit at the wall and seeing what sticks just as much as the audience is.

I think it's important to look back reasonably and say to ourselves man that was something. That was intense. It was a moment that felt like an eternity. It was a race we either won or lost.

That's Milgram.

I think it's important to appreciate those trials for what they were and what they gave. So we can better appreciate and understand what they've led to. To make it a little easier for us all to let hindsight in regardless of how stupid it makes us all feel or how heavily it may bruise our egos in order to reckon with the new moments we have ahead of us.

I think the most interesting thing to occur over the course of trial two were the prisoners responses to Haruka. Be it his situation or the news of his plan. Because looking back on it in hindsight... It's incredibly heart wrenching isn't it?

The audience slowly watched Haruka go through someone trying to put himself out there again albeit awkwardly and not that much to isolating himself in his room for days on end. Tearing himself up inside over what he felt he needed to do to protect the one person who ever looked at him in the way he wanted. The one person who had ever loved him in the way he wanted to be loved for better or worse.

His closest person.

So, close and so idyllic, in fact, he said she was his mother. Because she fit what he'd always wanted from a parent. Care, attention, being present. Picking out clothes for him to wear, showing him new ways to style his hair, telling him better ways to communicate with others. The proper way to communicate with others.

"Then what should have I done instead?! Tell me! Tell me, so even I can understand!"/ "It's not like I asked him to do that!"

Q.07 You just got given one million yen and need to use it up as quickly as possible, what will you do?

Haruka: I don’t know so please do it for me. I’ll give it to you.

Mu's Second Voice Drama Queen B

"It's not like I asked him to do that?"

I see. So, that's how it is, huh. You don't say anything; just because you're present, the wishes of those around you evolve to benefit you- Oh, so that's it. Like a born queen. No, it's as if you're influencing your surroundings not with words, but with pheromones.

"My sorry spells must be wearing off."

Mu: Mm... Mu's scared what if the warden changes his verdict and then terrible things happen to me.

Haruka: What no warden-san isn't like that.

Mu: But what if what they see next makes them realize Mu is a bad girl and they end up hating me...

"Hey, what if- If I am a bad girl. Don’t hate me."

Haruka: Don't worry I'll protect you- I'll talk to the warden for the both of us. They already forgave us once they wouldn't suddenly change their mind entirely-

Haruka Voice Drama Two Metamorphosis of the Weak

7:39 "Even though you said you forgive me..." You were told upfront that this is a three-trial system. "Why are you bullying me like this?" I'm not bullying you. I'm simply trying to figure out whether I should forgive you or not- and by extension whether your actions were wrong or not. "There's no way it was wrong! If I hadn't done it, nobody would have looked at me!" You killed to gain attention? The you who was never loved by anyone? "That's right! Because if I just remained a good-for-nothing, nobody would ever care about me!" Just because of that, someone- "Aren't I the only unfortunate person here?! Because I'm the only one who could never do anything right since I was born, because I could never do the same things as everyone around me, my mother gave up on me and I stopped existing in her world!"

It is so funny to read that last part again then look at Kazui in Cat going-

"I can’t stop, I can’t be normal."

And his second voice drama is just him lamenting the same thing. Like Yamanaka lowkey put some comedy in here that can only be appreciated in hindsight.

Haruka

"Why am I like this?! why does it hurt so much to just exist- I'm so sorry I had you waste your life on someone like me."

"Why was I born like this? Why does it hurt so much?"

Kazui a few trials down-

"Why am I fucking like this? Why can't I just be normal? Why do I have to let my cowardice dictate every social maneuver I make and every word I say? Just gotta keep lying it'll work out eventually! After all it's easier to be a let down than get let down! Can I get a witness bring the band in! Let's get swinging-"

"Lie, until it gets better, follow the king of the masquerade. Lick that sin and oppose punishment, until you can meet the king of the masquerade."

Sorry, I'm digressing Kazui was threatening to derail this post harder than Haruka derailed the collaboration art one. Not this time old man. Ahn one more before we hit the road-

"I can’t stop, I can’t stop- Am I still INNOCENT?"/ "I can’t stop, I can’t be normal."

Got damn it another one courtesy of Star,

"I wanted to be a pitied and loved weakling."/"I wanted to be loved, just like a cat."

Okay, now get out of here old man this is about the young man!

Mu was someone so important to Haruka that even after everything Es said to rile up and upset Haruka in his second voice drama he decided to try to be on his best behavior for her sake,

9:26s

"Haa... I'm sorry, warden-san. For causing you trouble." ... "My mother was Muu-san all along." Huh? "Muu-san is my mother." I don't think that's right. "It is, though." Is that really something you can deny... "Muu-san praises me. The useless me... She praises me, acknowledges me, looks at me, and she needs me. My current self only exists thanks to Muu-san." You did say you had two benefactors. So the other one was Muu, huh? "That's right. As long as Muu-san is here, I feel like there's a meaning to me coming to Milgram." ... "I've met my real mother. So, I'm happy. I'm sorry for causing problems earlier. I need to be a good boy- For Muu-san's sake as well."

10:52s

"U-um, I'm sorry, kind of..." Suddenly acting all well-mannered...! Is there something else you want to say? "U-uh something I want to say... Something I want to say..."

I'd appreciate if people could listen to the way Haruka speaks here the stammer and hesitance in his speaking. How when Es prompts him to say whatever he wanted to to say he says something I want to say, something I want to say. Voice cracking almost as though he knows what he should be saying but doesn't want to.

The voice direction on this line says a lot more in hindsight than it did back when this came out, huh?

11:08s

If there's nothing, that's fine. "...No, there is something..." What is it?

"Warden-san, Muu-san is afraid of Milgram."

"Please don't scare Muu-san anymore."

11:21s

You're worrying about a stranger in a situation like this? "Yes. Please forgive Muu-san next time as well." You sure are asking something of me here. Viewing Muu as your mother is great and all, but she might only be kind to you in order to use you, you know. "So, what?" ... "So, what if she's using me. Isn't it a good thing to be used? For someone to think of me as worthy enough to use me... isn't that something to be happy about?" Haruka...you... "If you don't forgive Muu-san, I'm going to kill you." You really have no learning ability whatsoever. You can't kill me. "Ah, right... Then... I'll kill myself instead." You...! "Was that against the rules too?" Not as far as I remember! "Hehe, hahahaha! See! I'm not an idiot, right?"

So, for whose sake was this again?

23/02/19

Haruka: Guard, can you hear me? You can, can’t you?

Haruka: I meant what I said in the interrogation. ……please forgive Mu-san.

23/04/07

Haruka: Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. Please forgive Mu-san. PleaseforgiveMu-sanpleaseforgiveMu-sanpleaseforgiveMu-sanpleaseforgiveMu-sanpleaseforgiveMu-sanpleaseforgiveMu-san

"Don’t wipe me out, don’t wipe me out- I just want to be your good boy."/ "If you want to betray from jealousy- You know what’s gonna happen ON YOU."

"I need to be a good boy- For Muu-san."

23/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)

Mu: Haruka-kun, I brought your food. Are you still alive? Has any mould started growing?

Haruka: ……ah, thank you very much. Mu-san. Sorry, um…… I……

Mu: You shouldn’t just lock yourself in your room all day. You have to eat your food properly. Hm, well…… I do understand why you’re feeling down. It feels bad. The atmosphere recently

Haruka: Um, I’m totally fine…… Just a bit, I’m thinking, about how to do it. What to do, what to do, to…… fulfil my promise. For Mu-san’s sake……

Yet, when Es asked her why she wasn't trying dissuade him from possibly harming himself even though they were friends. Even though she was the closest to him.

Even though she influenced how he dressed,

How he conducted himself while speaking,

21/09/02  (Yuno’s Birthday)

Haruka: Y-Yuno-san. Good morning! T-today’s your birthday, right……? Ha-happy birthday……!!

Yuno: Oooh…… Thanks? You’ve definitely changed a bit huh, Haruka. You speak a little louder now, and actually look people in the eyes when you talk.

Haruka: Eh, ah, i-is that so…… I wasn’t, aware of it myself, but…… Heh, hehe. Is that so.

Yuno: Ding ding! My sensor is telling me…… this is probably a girl’s influence. Well, everyone here is slowly changing, I guess. Even me.

"Hey..why don't you listen to me...? I'm telling you... Hey...HEY, I'M TALKING TO YOU!"

22/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)

Mu: What’s wrong, Haruka-kun? Did something happen? You shouldn’t look away like that when you’re together with me.

Haruka: Ah, s-sorry, Mu-san. Um…… No, it’s nothing. I just, suddenly got a feeling. That something is about to happen.

Mu: Isn’t that because it’s your birthday? Or perhaps it’s a sign the guard is about to wake up again soon? Fufufu, I bet they’ll be really surprised at a lot of things.

Haruka: That, might be true. But, I want the the guard to see. ……the new, me…….

And even his behavior while she wasn't even in the same room as him,

"I've met my real mother. So, I'm happy. I'm sorry for causing problems earlier. I need to be a good boy- For Muu-san's sake as well."

"Then what should have I done instead?! Tell me! Tell me, so even I can understand!"/ "That's right! Because if I just remained a good-for-nothing, nobody would ever care about me!"

Haruka's Second Voice Drama Metamorphosis of the Weak 8:15s

Just because of that, someone-

"Aren't I the only unfortunate person here?! Because I'm the only one who could never do anything since I was born. Because I could never do the same things as everyone around me- My mother gave up on me and I stopped existing in her world."

"The things that aren’t here, and the unneeded things- Is it still living somewhere?"

Haruka's Second Voice Drama Metamorphosis of the Weak 8:30s

And you believe that killing someone because of that was the right thing to do?

"I don't know! Then what should have I done, in your opinion?! Even after stealing things important to her, my mother still wouldn't show any interest in me! Then what do you think I should have done?!"

Despite all those things and Haruka's clear desire for guidance when asked why she wasn't dissuading him from his plan Mu just went why and how could I. It's not like I told him to do that, it was his choice and as his friend I should support him.

Because that's what friends do they support each other.

"Are you planning to tell me 'that's not what friendship is'? Then what is it? It's about sticking together because it's beneficial to everyone involved isn't it?"

So, why would I try to stop him. Guard is it just that you haven't had many friends.

She said all that right after leveraging his life for her own benefit within her second voice drama. She tried to build distance between herself and Haruka's behavior all while stating.

"Ah-but if you don't forgive me Haruka-kun will die. So, I think it'd be best not to do that."

Because that's just the sort of person Mu is. She wants all the benefits from an action and none of the responsibility. It doesn't matter if people are just doing things because they wanted to help her. Because she instigated or implied. She didn't ask and they were always free not to get involved.

They didn't need to pity her or try to help.

They could have just not listened. It's not Mu's fault they did. She's always been a drama queen after all. If they want to twist it to make her look like the villain then-

"If you’re going to make me the villain- It’s ok to ignore me."/"Hey..why don't you listen to me…? I'm telling you… Hey…HEY, I'M TALKING TO YOU!"

In hindsight it really appears as though Mu just said all that to preemptively say well whatever happens to him isn't Mu's fault.

Haruka's actions and choices are his own as his friend she should support him but it's not as though what he does is Mu's responsibility. Besides guard you could just vote me innocent and that won't happen. You could just vote everyone innocent you know. Isn't Mu so smart and helpful.

Please don't recognize that as the person closest to him I could just tell him I want him alive more than I want to be innocent. If you did that I would look really bad but luckily no one is going to- Hey, hey stop that what are you no- NO!

This is all Kotoko's fault.

24/07/05 (Mu’s Birthday)

Mu: You know, I think this is all your fault really. Everyone’s on edge because you lashed out. And because of that, nobody’s paying attention to me any more. It’s kinda boring. I don’t get it.

Kotoko: ……you went out of your way to say that to my face? Aren’t you scared of me? The next target of my fangs might be you.

Mu: Why? Kotoko-san, aren’t you punishing the bad guys? I didn’t do anything wrong. And anyway, fufu, you’re talking like you’re fine too. Aren’t you gonna be not forgiven too this time? What will you do then? Start biting yourself? Fufu, that’s hilarious. I want to watch.

Kotoko: ……you’re good at provoking people. I’ll pray that you won’t be forgiven this time. When that time comes, I’ll be sure to crush you.

Yeah, it's definitely not that a good majority of people who listened to the Queen B voice drama heard how callous and inconsiderate she was in regards to Haruka's well being. Then went,

"Well if this is how you think friends are supposed to be towards each other no wonder your life is like this."

Or saw her behavior in It's Not My Fault and aptly came to the same conclusion as those who watched the voice drama then voted solely off that.

It's not like anyone thought if she didn't care if he lived or died than why should any of them? She's the closest person to him and has lived with him in person for years and wasn't even batting an eye at his plan. So, why should the audience or Es be phased by it.

Like she said none of us told him to do that. That has nothing to do with us. He made that decision all on his own and could renege on it if he so chose to. Mu didn't come in her second voice drama going,

"Guard I'm really scared Haruka may hurt himself please just vote me innocent to stop him."

No she came in there and said that him telling her his plan made her happy and really feel their friendship. Then proceeded to say that was Haruka's choice, it's not like she asked him to do it, he has his own free will. It seems like the audience just agreed a little too hard and went you're right Mu that was his decision.

He didn't need to threaten himself like that. Why did Haruka put himself in this situation? Well we'll never know. So, guess it has nothing to do with you or us. Since that's the case we won't take that into consideration when it comes to your verdict.

"Oh before I forget, about Haruka Sakurai......are you sure about that “guilty” verdict? Weren’t you offered some sort of deal? I mean, not that I care. I guess that means you thought the same."

It simply doesn't matter we didn't force him to do that but he is trying to force us to vote you innocent through saying he'll do that. Something that many people may just take issue with in and of itself. Who am I to say I'm not every voter in Milgram.

Though, a good part of it could have been pushing Haruka out of a 50/50 several times and then into guilty. Like you said it's Haruka's decision that has very little to do with us. Again, it's not like we told him to do that either. I mean Mu didn't do anything to stop him right it's just like you said Mu,

"We are just the same."

"Don’t you think it’s wonderful to control them with my gentle sting."

No one made him do that. It's not the audiences fault or Mu's. He decided to make that promise and follow through on it of his own free will so sad too bad.

Mu's Second Voice Drama Queen B

12:28s I sure have understood that talking to you isn't getting me anywhere. But I guess I'll take your little explanation into consideration. "Ah- but if you don't forgive me Haruka-kun will die. So, I'd think it'd be best not to do that." ...! [Bell tolls] So you've heard about that no sense, too? "Mhm! Haruka-kun told me! So I could rest easy according to him. That made me happy. It made me really feel our friendship!" You know about it, and you're not trying to stop him? Haruka, that is? "Why would I? Haruka-kun says that's what he wants. So, there's nothing I can do, right?" But you're calling him your friend. "Isn't it exactly because he's my friend? Isn't friendship about letting your friends do the stuff they want?" ... "Are you planning to tell me 'that's not what friendship is'? Then, what is it? It's about sticking together because it's beneficial to everyone involved, isn't it?" I don't think Haruka is benefitting from that at all. "No way... It's not like you know what's good for him." ... You sure are tough to beat. "I really don't get what it is you're trying to say, Warden-san. Haruka-kun is free to decide what he wants, and I'm not doing anything wrong. It's not like I asked him to do that!

Given what transpired over the course of the intermission and all this I'd have to say Es was right with their assessment on how beneficial Mu's friendship was for Haruka. Because honestly with friends like these who needs enemies? He tells her he's going to kill himself and her first thing is it's alright because that's what you wanted to do and it will benefit me too! You're such a good friend Haruka that makes Mu so happy.

That made me happy... It made me really feel our friendship!

Even though Haruka said from the beginning of trial two he was doing well in Milgram.

22/10/06 (Mikoto’s Birthday)

Haruka: Mikoto-san. Um, are you ok……? Mikoto: Ah, Haru-kun. It’s been a while since we last talked, huh. Yeah, I’m fine. Are you doing ok……? Haruka: Ah, I’m fine. I’ve been enjoying myself, a lot. Um, I’m sorry, for avoiding you. I was a bit scared. Of you, honestly…… Mikoto: Ahhh, yeah. I’ve been lashing out whenever I go to sleep, right? ……it’s fine. Even I think you’re right to be scared. You know, I kinda just hate that I don’t even know what’s going on myself……haha. Ah, but despite all that you still came and talked to me because it’s my birthday, right? Thank you, you’ve grown into a good man.

He'd been enjoying himself a lot- So much so he never wanted to leave,

Q.03 Do you want to leave Milgram?

Haruka: I want to stay here forever.

He was even beginning to like himself,

Q.01  Do you love yourself?

Haruka: I think I like myself now.

He was happy in Milgram he even went as far to purport that if he was in Milgram from the start then he probably wouldn't have even wound up doing what he did.

Q.10 If you could turn back time, would you commit the same “murder”?

Haruka: I don’t know. If I was in Milgram I probably wouldn’t.

Hell, in his second trial written interrogation he flat out said he didn't want to die.

Q.17 How old do you want to live to be?

Haruka: I never thought about it. I don’t want to die.

But yeah no one else had any input when it came to this plan at all. Despite the fact that up until the end Haruka continually said he wasn't doing this for himself he was doing it for Mu's sake to protect her.

23/12/15 (Kotoko’s Birthday)

Haruka: ……please, don’t tell anyone. And also, please, don’t get involved. All I can do, is ask, you……

Kotoko: ––Fufu, fufufufufu. That’s a crazy thing to be thinking. Honestly, it’s weird. But I don’t hate it. If only all the wrongdoers were like you.

Haruka: No…… that’s wrong…… That’s not, why I’m doing, this……This, isn’t for me…… I have to protect…… so, Kotoko-san…… please……

Kotoko: Eh? Ah, yeah, yeah. Well, I promise I won’t get in your way. Honestly, if I could, I’d love to do it myself, but I’ll step back this time. As for what happens next…… I wonder. It depends on Es.

Not to repent for any of his behavior, not because he felt ashamed, or unhappy at his new verdict all for Mu.

23/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)

Mu: Haruka-kun, I brought your food. Are you still alive? Has any mould started growing?

Haruka: ……ah, thank you very much. Mu-san. Sorry, um…… I……

Mu: You shouldn’t just lock yourself in your room all day. You have to eat your food properly. Hm, well…… I do understand why you’re feeling down. It feels bad. The atmosphere recently

Haruka: Um, I’m totally fine…… Just a bit, I’m thinking, about how to do it. What to do, what to do, to…… fulfil my promise. For Mu-san’s sake……

"So, what if she's using me. Isn't it a good thing to be used? For someone to think of me as worthy enough to use me… isn't that something to be happy about?"

He couldn't have made it clearer that he wasn't doing this because he wanted to. He was doing it because he had to.

24/04/19 (Futa’s Birthday)

Futa: ––Hey, are you really ok with this? If you come with me, there’s a chance you can be saved too…… Haruka.

Haruka: Yeah…… I’ve made my mind up. I have, something, that I have to do.

Futa: Ah, is that right…… Haruka, you know, you’re an idiot. There’s no way…… that will save you……

Haruka: Yeah, thank you. I’m glad you came to talk to me, Futa. Um, thank you, for being so kind. Really. But, I’m sorry. This is all I’m able to do……

Literally the last time we see him he said it was something that he had to do. Literally to the one person who tried to dissuade him from doing it. Mu did nothing to try to stop him and Kotoko laughed like Christmas had come early. Kotoko's only complaint was she wanted to do it herself.

"Honestly, if I could, I’d love to do it myself."

Kotoko: Killing yourself all alone on a Friday night why not let me help with that.

Haruka: Na-no I'm alright please don't intervene.

The fact he told Kotoko not to intervene in hindsight could have been him looking for an out. Since he straight up asks Es if harming himself is against the rules of Milgram than goes and tells who is Es' helper his plan like don't interfere.

Like maybe she'd interfere because death isn't apart of Milgram's punishments and it'd be cheating my way out. Kotoko who openly wants everyone here besides her fucking dead just went,

Kotoko: Fufufu ha, ha rip evildoer would love to do it myself but I'll hold off. Really appreciating that you know how to take the trash out at least- I wish more criminals were like you. Can't wait to see this shit. Know what's almost as good as me getting to kill you myself- You being dead!

"“UNDER” Doltish “001 Parasite”."/ "So ridiculous, isn’t it ridiculous- They’re still here, still here, it grates me."

As Haruka stood there like,

Haruka: . . .

Why would she have done anything other than laugh. In hindsight this is the best birthday gift she could have gotten.

Mu on the other hand isn't Kotoko. She's someone that calls herself Haruka's friend. She's someone who continually presented herself as being useful through taking care of him by bringing him food to his room every day. Quelling the concerns of anyone who goes to ask about him by assuring them he's fine and she's taking such good care of him.

Yet she just straight up says him committing to doing that all for her really made her feel their friendship.

The cats not even in the bag she literally said the quiet part out loud when all this was going down. Before going if that's really what he wants to do who is she as his friend to stop him. Instead she should support him and his choices because that's what friends are for.

Then she did just what she said she would as his friend.

She supported him, brought him food, and made sure he had time to think over how to do it while giving telling everyone that asked not to worry Mu's taking care of him. Knowing full and well what he was planning and working on figuring out how to do the entire time. Because again he told her about it before it was even put into motion.

She constantly checked in and continued to instigate a scenario where she was one of the only people he saw or a daily basis.

All while saying shit like,

"Are you still alive? Has any mould started growing?"

23/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)

Mu: Haruka-kun, I brought your food. Are you still alive? Has any mould started growing?

Haruka: ……ah, thank you very much. Mu-san. Sorry, um…… I……

Mu: You shouldn’t just lock yourself in your room all day. You have to eat your food properly. Hm, well…… I do understand why you’re feeling down. It feels bad. The atmosphere recently.

Haruka: Um, I’m totally fine…… Just a bit, I’m thinking, about how to do it. What to do, what to do, to…… fulfill my promise. For Mu-san’s sake……

Haruka are you still alive in there- Have you begun growing mould. You're not going to betray Mu too. Do you not care enough about Mu to keep your word now is that it? But if you don't the guard will just do worse and worse things to me. The atmosphere is already so bad too... What you do care about Mu? Well if you care prove it.

Doesn't sound like that impossible of a stretch for the girl who's first song has a chalkboard with drawings goading her victim to either kill herself or be murdered, and is shown to have placed flowers on her victim's desk to basically tell her to kill herself.

Which we know the desk with the flowers on it is her victims seat because we see Mu sitting in hers in After Pain. As well as her victim after being bullied in the classroom later with the same flowers still placed on the desk.

So it wouldn't be the first time she was implied to be attempting to goad someone into killing themselves. Or even the first time she was implied to be successful either.

At no point is she shown making one attempt to dissuade him from doing this. Not even a,

"No, don't worry about that now. The atmosphere has been bad recently right let's try to cheer up together."

Or a,

"No, I understand you're doing this for Mu's sake but honestly I'd rather you not."

Just a well don't lock yourself in your room all day you have to eat even if you are planning to end it all come on now. You can't plan on an empty stomach..

Her presence had more than likely been a constant reminder of the promise he made regardless of if he didn't want to follow through or not. Making it so he became more and more focused on how to keep his word to her instead of any other possibility. Small aside the funny thing about Mu's karaoke collaboration art is the butterfly imagery.

Something shown to be a tie between her and Haruka.

I say this is funny because butterflies are heavily associated with causality. Particularly in relation to chaos theory. Such as how the smallest act like a butterfly flapping it wings can lead to catastrophe. Mu was that butterfly for Haruka. She came gently flapping in showing interest in someone who she recognized was vulnerable and took advantage of them under the pretense of being friends.

21/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)

Mu: Haruka-kun, are you awake……? Happy birthday.

Haruka: M-Mu-san? I… I-I’m awake…… Th-thank you, very much. I’m… glad……

Mu: ………… Shall we talk? You know, recently I’ve been pretty interested in you.

Haruka: ……!! I-in me…? Hehe, hehehe…… interested, in me.

Like she did to many of her so-called friends before him,

Q.18 Do you regret anything?

Mu: I think maybe I should have chosen my friends a bit more carefully.

All the other prisoners left Haruka in her care because they thought like the audience did in regards to Mahiru and Shidou that Mu was Haruka's friend. That she like the audience or more than the audience would want him to be okay. She would want to get out of this together with him and see him succeed even if that made her time a little more difficult. They thought that she would want him to keep living that if something was wrong she would tell them because she cared.

That Mu would do the the right thing because she said she was doing it, she said that's what they were, and they took her at her word

23/07/05 (Mu’s Birthday)

Futa: Oi, you. Is he ok? He’s not even left his room lately.

Mu: You mean Haruka-kun? Hmm. Yeah, probably. I’ve been bringing all his meals to him so he should be fine. Isn’t that great of me?

Futa: Hah? Who the hell says that sort of thing about themself. ……ah, no, well, right now I understand a bit. When you’re feeling down, it’s nice to have someone who relies on you and accepts you. The rest of us can’t really understand you from where we’re standing. But well, if you’re Haruka’s “salvation” then I guess it really is great.

Mu: Salvation……? I don’t know what you mean. Futa-kun, you don’t sound like yourself. Did you hit your head or something? Oh, wait, you actually did, didn’t you. Ahaha. Ah, putting that aside though, did you know it’s my birthday today?

24/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)

Shidou: ……I’m worried about Sakurai-kun. I haven’t seen him around in a while. You’ve been talking with him, right?

Mu: He’s fine. Here, look. I’ve been taking his food to him like this every day. Isn’t that great of me?

Shidou: Yes, very. I’m sorry I’ve been leaving it to you to look after him. Usually, that would be the job of us adults, and yet we’re leaving you with the burden.

Mu: Don’t worry about it. After all, me and Haruka-kun are friends.

"Are you planning to tell me 'that's not what friendship is'? Then what is it? It's about sticking together because it's beneficial to everyone involved isn't it?"

And they wound up paying for it.

The fact is that Mu knew he was suicidal just as much as Es did and for just as long as Es did. She decided not tell anyone else or try to stop him. In fact, she assured everyone else he was fine. Sure, he wasn't going out much, but he's fine-

"See look Mu is taking food to him right now. Look at this nice plate she made for him. Isn't Mu a great girl, isn't Mu helping, isn't Mu useful, isn't Mu indispensable. "

Okay, but we like all asked about Haruka. We all asked how he was, and you consistently assured us he was fine.

The first person outside of Mu amongst the prisoners to find out about Haruka's plan was Kotoko. And, well, we all saw how that went. He told her that he was going to cause harm to himself and she laughed in his face. She was delighted at the information the only downside was since he was taking himself out she couldn't do it. If only more criminals were like him though that'd be good.

After that no one else even cared enough to check in on him outside of Futa repeatedly, and Shidou once probably long after Haruka had already done it. You know who was there long before anyone else, who he viewed as a mother, someone who could have given him alternatives, told him what to do, and he would have listened to. Someone who could have done all that as his friend and just as a person who cared about his mental and physical wellbeing. Or just as a person who didn't want to watch someone die right in front of them if they could help it. In the ways she pretended to care in front of the others she lives with?

Mu.

Why the fuck would Kotoko care? It makes sense for her to find it funny, laugh, and do nothing to stop whatever plan Haruka may have had.

23/12/15 (Kotoko’s Birthday)

Haruka: ……please, don’t tell anyone. And also, please, don’t get involved. All I can do, is ask, you……

Kotoko: ––Fufu, fufufufufu. That’s a crazy thing to be thinking. Honestly, it’s weird. But I don’t hate it. If only all the wrongdoers were like you.

Haruka: No…… that’s wrong…… That’s not, why I’m doing, this…… This, isn’t for me…… I have to protect…… so, Kotoko-san…… please……

Kotoko: Eh? Ah, yeah, yeah. Well, I promise I won’t get in your way. Honestly, if I could, I’d love to do it myself, but I’ll step back this time. As for what happens next…… I wonder. It depends on Es.

She's Kotoko! Again- Her entire second song is going I fucking hate all these other people being here. Come on?

"They're still here, still here, it grates me."

And her first one has this in it,

"The normalcy sought for, fading away- Every time death comes the soul moves forward."/ "Laugh and I can get to like myself.'

"––Fufu, fufufufufu. That’s a crazy thing to be thinking. Honestly, it’s weird. But I don’t hate it. If only all the wrongdoers were like you."

At that point, by some sick form of coincidence, he's doing her a favor too without even recognizing it. Like she has no solid character motivation to give a fuck or lift a finger to stop him and every character motivation not to. She is the worst person he could have told about this. She's is popping the biggest bottles in her cell after this conversation.

But you know who has it the roughest? Futa. Not only had he been going out of his way to check on Haruka. If the last time we saw Haruka is also the day he died then Haruka just killed himself straight up on Futa's fucking birthday.

And the last conversation Futa had with him after being concerned and trusting in Mu was him begging the guy in frustration to do anything else.

24/04/19 (Futa’s Birthday)

Futa: ––Hey, are you really ok with this? If you come with me, there’s a chance you can be saved too…… Haruka.

Haruka: Yeah…… I’ve made my mind up. I have, something, that I have to do.

Futa: Ah, is that right…… Haruka, you know, you’re an idiot. There’s no way…… that will save you……

Haruka: Yeah, thank you. I’m glad you came to talk to me, Futa. Um, thank you, for being so kind. Really. But, I’m sorry. This is all I’m able to do……

He got past Mu, came into Haruka's room, probably saw what Haruka had come up with to do it and then literally went you can just come with me, you can be saved too. You don't have to do this there are options I'm listing them- He starts this giving alternatives. He's trying and it becomes clearer and clearer Haruka just isn't going to listen to him.

There's nothing he can say. He can't do anything either.

He can't restrain Haruka. Like many thought he'd be restrained after his second trial Guilty verdict. Stating that if we just voted Haruka Guilty he'd be restrained, unable to harm himself, and then we'd be able to vote Mu however we wanted with that threat no longer above our heads. Because he'd be restrained he wouldn't be able to harm himself.

Futa couldn't just tie Haruka's restraints around him all by himself and lock him in his cell until the guard woke up. Like Es Futa is smaller than Haruka while not being protected by the same measures Es is. So, he wasn't gonna throw hands with him and win that's for sure.

5'4 Futa was not winning a fight against I can kill anything smaller than me 5'7 Haruka. Yet he tried and what can you really say when you go in and check on someone you've been living with for years after months of attempting to while being told they're fine by the person closest to them who you believed then you see the state they're in and hear the plan they have to end themselves.

In the moment we didn't know what Haruka was going to do.

We don't have a tone when it comes to the timelines. But now in hindsight how gut wrenching this must have been. How upset he must have sounded. How defeated his name calling must have sounded to Haruka.

This is the difference in tone between The Last Goodbye and Space Was So Cool with hindsight. If you now ya know.

This is the sort of angst one can only feel in hindsight. It is ridiculous how hard this timeline goes now. No one can imagine being in the situation Futa was fucking in here. Seeing someone you know unraveled to the extent Haruka was where he could see no other option forward but this.

To know that whatever you say won't be heard to know that you don't even have the power to stop them.

How defeated and useless he must have felt. How absolutely helpless he must have felt during this. Standing there knowing if he could just get him out of this room, if he could just convince him to go somewhere else for even a second things could have been different now. Wondering all at once what if I came in here back then instead of just asking Mu about him, what if I stepped in earlier, what if I checked in more would I have been able to stop this.

To recognize how unhelpful what Haruka was choosing to do was for him. How it was a disservice to Haruka's very own personhood. How this wouldn't save him. All while having no power to convince him not to do it. Nobody understands how heartbreaking that could have been for him. After getting to know this dude and living with him for several years. After saying he didn't have the luxury to care about others and he wasn't a kid anyway then going right back to showing concern because that's how much he actually cared.

Despite us never seeing Haruka do the same thing for him when he was Guilty.

You're telling me no one is seeing how tragic this shit is. No one. This is an angst goldmine. I don't go in the tag so maybe there's a fucking avalanche of angst art on this timeline now. All of Futa pleading with him to just leave just get out of there and try something else be saved another way then devolving into calling him stupid in tears because it's the only recourse he has.

He can't stop him.

He can only say childish insults because how else is he going to know how stupid this all is. Then Haruka's I know and thank you for being so kind after how everyone else responded to Haruka's plan.

IT JUST HITS DIFFERENT NOW OKAY!

It hits different and doesn't deserve to hit this different but it fucking does okay. It just fucking does. Can you imagine the anguish? Because I can. It's ridiculous.

Sure he may not have been broken up about it. Maybe we'll find out later he wasn't and he didn't try to stop him at all. Yet, he's the only one who offered any other alternative. Any out. He was the only one he said not only through his words but actions don't do this.

He may have been leveled about the situation but the range of emotion that can be gleaned from this timeline now. Knowing what we know now- Is amazing! It's impressive. It is a literal playground of emotional depth.

No matter what parts of the story you touch on in hindsight it just gets more compelling.

Like that's nasty (positive connotation here)- Yamanaka was on some shit writing and making this. That's fucked up on his birthday. Futa's birthday?! He has to think about this every birthday now. Just thinking back on the dynamics between all of the characters mentioned here and how they grew over the course of these trials along with the ways they ended.

Haruka going from not even being able to speak to Kotoko to confiding in her.

Futa going from wanting to look out for Haruka and Mikoto to in a way losing both of them. Having to wonder if that concern is still there now after everything with Haruka.

Mu going from barely talking to Haruka to being the person closest to him and a driving force in some of the biggest choices he made. It's all really impressive character work. That will only get easier to appreciate the series progresses and after it ends.

[sereinreality]

making a luis lives au and having it lead up to re6 so i just want to write down my ideas so far

- ada saves him without a shadow of a doubt. somehow, someway, she gets him off the island and takes him to a hospital to heal while she spends those next couple of months making plans. when luis is properly healed, she would offer one of two options; either work with her or she’ll leave him some things but they have to keep little to no contact. luis obviously goes for the first choice.

- they definitely bond over the course of time they work together from re5 to re6. i like to think their similar backgrounds, history, and goals bring them closer together. luis would always try to find a reason to throw festivities, he’s very insistent on celebrating ada’s birthday or any holiday.

- they do a lot of moving around which means time to kill and lots of stories. luis likes to play a game where he tells a story and ada has to guess wether it actually happened or he just made it up. most of the time he’s lying but argues “you never know! maybe someday it will be true!” it makes ada smile. luis tries to make her smile as often as he can.

- luis didn’t change in terms of making jokes. he figures there’s no point in falling to despair when you’ve been given your last chance so he makes the most of it. it annoyed ada at first, thinking that luis wasn’t taking this seriously but upon closer inspection, she realized he’s grown way more cautious than before. she excused some of the teasing after that but never backed down from some back and forth

- ada and luis are like soulmates in the way that they are two sides of the same coin. where there’s one, you’ll find the other. they are connected by coincidence but they treasure it. more than anything, it’s a deep understanding between them. everything they did to survive, to get out of their respective situations, the choices they made, and the loneliness they felt. luis swears that as long as he lives, ada will never feel alone again. ada says likewise. both of them mean it with their whole heart.

- under NO circumstances can leon learn that luis survived. it’s a depressing truth they both understand that if leon got the smallest hint of luis’s survival that he would begin a manhunt to find him. they have too much work being carried out that cannot be compromised. that doesn’t stop luis from searching for leon’s name in government files or papers, he keeps up to date with anything where he’s involved. what can he say? the knight misses his prince.

- that being said leon does not handle post valdelobos very well. he still has luis’s lab key which he keeps in a box tucked away somewhere. sometimes the smell of smoke brings him back to spain and the mines where he lost someone he’s grown so close to in just a small amount of time. it shouldn’t break him as much as it does but it’s something that stays in the back of his mind. leon feels like he missed something. that there was an opportunity open to him that he failed to see, it could have been something but now he’ll never know. the door shut in his face just when leon realized what was being offered to him.

- once he saw don quixote displayed on a bookstore window with a lovely red cover and bought it immediately. it sits on his shelf collecting dust, leon hasn’t had time to read it or so he says.

- the trio do reunite in re6 but more importantly, luis catches wind of some of the stunts leon had been pulling and their first interaction after years was luis marching up to leon as he backs into a wall. luis is shouting in spanish, probably complaining about leon not prioritizing his own safety, then switching to english so he can yell in a language leon understands. it was here that he catches leon’s face. he’s so much older now, worn out like leather. leon looked exhausted but he also seemed so amazed? confused? whatever it was, he looked softer now and his eyes widen a little. he simply says, “you’re alive?”

[hotchnerwrites]

Hiiii 🤍 I'm the anon who requested Obsessed Hotch i wanted to tell you that you did an amazing job i really loved what you wrote, thanks for taking the request 🥹🥹🫂

I thought of something new if you don't mind🥹

It could be something about Hotch and the reader where they're sitting across from each other, maybe in a restaurant or something and he says something like 'don't you think you're too far away from me?🤨?' Or maybe the reader lifts his foot a little under the table to stretch it out and Hotch feels the movement so he pulls it a little to indicate that he should come closer. 🥹

In the end they end up sitting next to each other and he is so proud that he got what he wanted. 🙂‍↕️

I know i mentioned a restaurant but it can also be while they eat at home or even at work whatever is best for you.🫶🏻

I hope you had an amazing holiday and have the most amazing year ever! 🫂💌💌

I send you my love and a hug 🙂‍↕️

pls just consider it only if you like the idea if you can't ignore it!🫂

One Inch Closer

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x reader

Word Count: 0.9k

Warnings: SFW, first date, new relationship, fluff, flirting, nervousness, hand-holding, Aaron is touchy

A/N: Hello Anon! Thank you so much for your kind words. This is the kind of stuff that keeps me motivated!!! I'm so glad to see you in my requests again, it's always such a pleasure to write for you. I'd been hoping you'd request again <3 I'm sorry for the wait; I was travelling, and I had no access to my laptop. But it's done finally! I hope you like it, please enjoy reading it!!! Sending you my love. Oh, btw! I wrote two parts for this 👀 😁 I legit couldn't choose between either suggestion. Keep an eye out for a part two hehe 💨💨

Dividers by @/enchanthings-a My requests are open! Send me stuff :)

You hadn’t thought buying an ice cream at your local park would’ve landed you in this spot a couple weeks later.

It had been on a whim. You hadn’t seen one of those ice cream trucks since you were seven, and it had been a hot day. So, you’d decided to treat yourself to something sweet. You definitely deserved it after the week you’d had. After fending off some very hyperactive children, you managed to acquire your soft serve. And that’s where you met him— Aaron Hotchner. He had been hard to miss, a towering wall of muscle standing in line behind you. 

You don’t know how it happened, how a simple gesture of sharing a bench with him as you licked your cone had turned into a surprisingly entertaining conversation. Maybe it was when you started laughing at his dry jokes. Maybe it was when he told you about the time he accidentally wore mismatched shoes to a meeting and didn’t notice until someone pointed it out an hour later. 

You couldn’t hide your delight as he shrugged and said, “At least they were both black.” 

But somewhere between the ice cream and the short stroll through the park after, you’d found yourself falling for him. So you didn’t think twice about accepting his request for dinner together. Now, here you were, sitting across from Aaron’s handsome features at a candlelit table in a fancy restaurant.

And you were nervous. 

No, this was way more— you could almost hear your heart hammering. You cast a glance at Aaron across your booth, wondering if he could feel your nerves radiating across the table. But he seemed entirely at peace, his demeanour calm as he perused the menu. If anything, it just made the difference between the two of you feel even more glaring. Aaron was effortlessly composed. Meanwhile, you were fidgeting with the tablecloth, the restaurant feeling like a furnace suddenly. You could only pray that something would distract you from these incessant first-date nerves. 

“What would you like to eat tonight? The roast chicken is the only thing I can pronounce on here, I might just get that,” he laughs quietly, eyes twinkling in the soft light of the candle.

You blinked. Your mouth opened in response, but your brain had apparently taken a walk. An awkward silence ensued, but pandemonium broke loose within you.

Oh my god. You couldn’t believe you’d just frozen up like that. Not after how easy conversation had flowed with him in the park. What if he thought you were bizarre? You probably looked like an idiot right now. Please, don’t let this be the reason you never hear from him again.

“Are you all right?” Aaron’s deep timbre cut through the chaos of your mind. His brown eyes were studying you from across the table. You had feared judgment, but there was nothing but concern behind the intensity of his gaze. 

“Yeah... I’m fine. Sorry, uh, I’m just…” you chuckled nervously, “First date jitters, I think.”

A smile tugged the corner of his mouth. 

“I don’t bite, sweetheart,” he teased, his voice soothing the tension in your stomach.

You laughed, enchanted by how easily he had managed to put a stop to your spiralling.

The waiter dropped off your drinks, and for a moment, there was nothing but the soft clink of glasses, the rustling of the napkins, and the quiet hum of conversations filling the space. Then, Aaron shifted in his seat, his focus narrowing on you. His brow furrowed slightly—something unreadable flashing through his gaze.

He seemed a bit… off. 

You shifted uncomfortably, unsure of what to do. 

Was the conversation too dry? Or maybe the food was taking too long?

A breath of hesitation caught in your chest as your eyes met his. You could acutely feel the weight of his gaze, soft yet all-consuming, as if he was dissecting every little thought, every little gesture.

"Is something wrong?" you asked, voice tentative.

"No," Aaron said quickly, though there was a tension in his posture, something that was just a little too intense for the moment. He took a deep breath, his gaze never leaving you. “But don’t you think you’re a little... too far away?”

You blinked at him, unsure what he meant at first, but then his eyes softened with a hint of something—was he flirting?

He was still watching you, eyes never wavering. There was something in the air now, something you couldn’t quite define, but you felt it rush through your veins, making your heart skip.

A nervous giggle slipped from your lips before you could stop it. You felt a flush creeping up your neck, and you quickly masked it with a smile. “Is that so?”

There was something effortlessly intimate about the way he said it, how he made it feel like it was your choice, your move. Without thinking, you got up and slid next to him in the booth. 

"Better?" you asked softly, your voice not quite as steady as you wanted it to be.

Aaron’s lips curled into a satisfied smile, “Much.” 

His gaze lingered on you for a moment longer, before his hand, ever so casually, reached out to cover yours. The heat of his palm felt comforting against your skin and steadied your pulsing heart.

The waiter came back with your food, but neither of you really paid attention to the plates being set down in front of you.

"Thanks for coming tonight," he said, his voice suddenly softer, almost vulnerable. “I wasn’t sure you’d say yes when I asked, but I’m really glad you did.”

You smiled, your heart fluttering again. “Aaron, I wouldn’t miss this for all the world.”

And in the quiet that followed, you both knew it wasn’t just a dinner anymore. It was the start of something new, something that neither of you had fully anticipated—but were both quietly excited to explore.

Thank you for reading! I appreciate any likes/comments/reblogs/follows. Constructive criticism is welcome. Do not plagiarise my content and/or post it anywhere without crediting me.

part 2 (coming soon!)

[crowsofdarkness]

Moment Of Weakness: Chapter Eighteen

-gif not mine. credit to owner-

Pairings: Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Content Warnings: language, 18 + smut, angst, fluff, affair, cheating, violence, kidnapping, faking a pregnancy.

Summary: Reader is the assistant to New York's most feared mob boss, James Buchanan Barnes. He had the picture-perfect life: status in the mob, friends, and beautiful wife. So why can't he keep his mind and eyes off of reader?

Authors Note: I just wanted to remind everyone who reads this, there are heavy moments of cheating/having an affair in this story. You might not agree with the actions of "reader" or Bucky but it does pertain to the storyline. If anyone is interested, tags are open for this! Just send me a message or comment!

There is smut in this chapter: protected p in v, spanking, slight degradation, and oral with male receiving,

Tags: @cjand10 @generalmoonpolice @sapphirebarnes @baw1066 @nameless-ken @minami97

His moans sounded like a perfectly conducted orchestra to my ears, a gentle melody that brought goosebumps to my skin as I moved my head up and down. The slow, meticulous pace made Bucky grab a fist full of my hair with his vibranium fingers and did his best to urge me faster. I placed my own hand on his bare stomach, the hairs from his happy trail tickling my palm, and I patted the skin there in a silent way to say all in due time, love.

Bucky hissed in agony, the tip of his cock pushing further down my throat. I moaned against his shaft, the vibrations from the low ruble made his head fall back onto the pillow, lips parting in ecstasy. 

“You’re so good at that, doll,” Bucky praised. 

I clenched my walls together, not wanting to finish before he even had the chance to touch me. 

My lips were slick and swollen with my own saliva and his precum and when our eyes met, I saw how blown his once blue eyes were, the lust clouded his vision. Tonight was all about him, pleasing him in any way he wanted and all he asked for was one thing. 

“I want to fuck that pretty little mouth,” he groaned against my ear, his lips nibbling on the skin. 

We were at work earlier today when he snuck up behind while I was in the supplies closet, looking for more pens. While he had his arms wrapped around me, his hard cock pressed into the roundness of my ass. When I leaned into him, he hissed out a low moan. 

“Doll, if you don’t stop I’m going to fuck you right here in this closet.” 

I didn’t so he did. 

It was incredibly hard to keep quiet so neither Steve or Sam heard us, their office right on the other side of the wall. Bucky’s cock pounding into me from behind, my velvet walls clenching around him as I grasped for anything I could. A loud moan crawled its way from my throat as I spasmed my climax all over him which made Bucky cover my mouth with his vibranium hand. 

“Quiet, Y/N. You need to keep that mouth shut otherwise they’ll hear you,” Bucky demanded with a slap to my bare ass. “Unless that turns you on, letting others hear how good I’m fucking this tight pussy.” 

A tight tug of my hair brought me back to now and Bucky’s hips raised up off of the bed as his gut tightened. His lips fell open and with the way his breathing became erratic, I knew he was close. 

I flattened my tongue underneath the length of him and took the amount that couldn’t fit in my mouth in my hand and began to move both at a crazed pace. 

“So close,” he breathed. 

I gave his ass a squeeze to urge him on and soon felt his hot liquid shoot to the back of my throat, his groans of release echoing throughout my bedroom. 

“Oh, Y/N.” 

My name falling from his lips made my shutter in desire, wanting to hear him say it just like that for the rest of my life. 

With a pop, I released his cock from the confines of my mouth and sloppy kissed my way up from his stomach all the way to his lips where he tasted himself on my tongue. As we pulled away, Bucky quickly had me on my back and raised my leg over his back, opening up my cunt to him. 

I rummaged through my bedside table and handed him a condom, which he put on with an attractive quickness. 

“Ready?” He raised a brow at me. 

Bucky got his answer by me pulling him down for a kiss, my tongue reaching every crevice and lips catching between his teeth, undoubtedly making them swollen tomorrow. 

A slow, dragging in motion of his hips and Bucky was inside of me, my pussy quickly adjusting to his size. Both of us moaning at the familiar feeling but yet new as the first time. 

“Oh fuck,” my eyes fluttered shut with pure bliss. 

His hips were moving at a slow pace, almost as payback for my actions earlier, and I crawled at his back desperately needing his hips slapping against me. 

“Bucky,” I whined. “Please, I can’t take it this slow.” 

He buried his cock deep within me, the tip touching all new territories, and pressed his forehead against my chest. The smell of his shampoo filled my senses and I smiled at the familiarity it was starting to become. 

Cedarwood. 

“It’s so good. I can’t get enough of it,” Bucky admitted with a grunt. 

I snuck a hand between us where we met and pressed a thumb to the sensitive clit, tracing it in circles. 

He watched with dark eyes. “You’re so needy, doll. Did you not get enough earlier?” 

“Never,” I panted. 

Bucky began to move a bit faster now although not at the pace I would have loved. 

“I never want to forget this,” he groaned, dragging his cock almost all the way out before burying it deep within me again. 

He continued this for quite awhile. 

I raised my hips off the bed, hoping the new position would hit the exact spot I needed. My fingers on my bud and his cock moving at this god awful pace wasn’t enough to scratch that itch. 

Cool, vibranium fingers started to massage my left breast, tweaking my nipple between them. 

That. That's what I needed for the coil in my lower abdomen to heat up, arousal filling my veins. 

“That’s my girl,” Bucky cooed when he felt my walls starting to clench and unclench, my orgasm so close. 

I stammered, trying to find the words to say, but nothing came out so instead my teeth scraped and nibbled at the skin of his neck. I did my best not to leave a mark but with the sudden fast pace from Bucky, I bit down hard and brought the skin between my teeth. 

He hissed in glory, the pain turning him on even more. Both of his hands cupped my face and as we stared into each other's eyes, my heart jumped into my throat when I noticed how he looked at me. The glimmer in his blue eyes returned for a moment, lips reaching the corners of his eyes in a smile. 

“What?” I asked, breathless. 

He caught my lips in a gentle kiss. “You’re beautiful, doll.” 

His words were the last thing I needed to spasm underneath him, hands grasping at the bedsheets while he dragged out my orgasm from me, his own spilling into the condom. Bucky rested his forehead against my chest as we laid there for a few moments, coming down from the shared high, and once our breaths were steady and even, he collapsed next to me.

His hand found my face and as mine covered it, we shared a tender kiss. 

Bucky brought the covers up and over our bodies, the wind from my open window now blanketing us in a bitter chill. 

“Hey, Bucky?” I spoke after some time of quietness. 

“Hm?” 

There had been something bothering me all day, or for the last few days really. Since I realized I was being followed. There was never a great time to bring it up to him, especially after what we went through a bit ago, but I couldn’t ignore the thoughts any longer. 

My finger traced up and down his stomach. “How well do Clint and Natasha know each other?” 

Bucky’s body tensed under my touch for a moment, eyes staring down at me. “Are you sure you want to talk about this now?” 

“I can’t get over this feeling and I need your opinion on it,” I admitted with a sigh. 

It didn’t make sense to me how now, all of a sudden, Clint had me in his cross-hairs while Natasha’s calls to Bucky when he was here became more persistent. 

He turned on his side to give me his full attention and nodded, wrapping my leg over him. The tip of his cock brushed against the inside of my thigh. 

“Why did you drag Natasha out of his house that night?” 

Bucky sighed. “I never trusted him around her. They basically grew up together and were really good friends before her and I got married. They have this joke about something happening in Budapest but she doesn’t tell me when I ask.”

“Clint was showing off these new arrows that when they pierce someone, it injects some kind of serum or poison into them. I didn’t want Natasha around that,” he admitted. 

“Oh,” I muttered. 

Bucky lifted my chin up towards him. “I won’t let Clint hurt you, doll.” 

“You don’t think-.” 

My question was halted by Bucky’s phone ringing and neither of us had to look to see who was calling. She always called as soon as we were done, almost as if she knew. 

Bucky reached over me, leaving a fast kiss on my shoulder, before answering his phone. 

“Hey sweetheart.” 

My heart dropped, hearing him call her that, and Bucky noticed so as he pulled the phone away from him, he gave me a mind bending kiss. 

“Sorry, yeah,” Bucky brought the phone back after hearing her yell for him. 

As he listened to her rage about something, he dragged his finger up and down my bare back. I eased into him and placed a few chaste kisses over his chest and over the scars on his shoulder. 

I found myself loving them and wanting to let Bucky know that I didn’t mind them. 

“I’ll be home soon, I got caught up at Steve’s.” 

The way he lied with such ease scared me and made me wonder if he was still lying about something to me. 

“Yeah, see you soon.” 

Bucky ended the call and went to speak but I cut him off by kissing his lips. 

“Don’t go,” I begged while wrapping my arms around him. 

“I’m sorry, doll. I have too,” Bucky sighed. 

“You don’t. You can stay, just tell her that you decided to stay the night at Steve’s,” I suggested. 

I was the first to admit that I did not like having to beg for him to stay but at this moment, I truly did not want him to leave. 

“We have to deal with this for a few more weeks. By then Matt will have the papers ready to serve Natasha. Then I can stay over as long as you’d have me,” Bucky brushed his lips over my forehead. 

I buried my face into his chest, savoring his scent for a few more minutes before he had to leave, and muttered into his chest. 

“I’d have you stay forever if I could.”

[somewhere-in-the-rain]

3 things I loved about Onyx Storm (and 3 things I didn’t)

Disclaimer: I gave Onyx Storm 5 stars. Any book that has that kind of emotional effect on me is an immediate favourite. This is just my opinion :)

Spoilers for Onyx Storm ahead

3 things I loved

Domestic Riorgail. Omg. They are my favourite fictional couple ever. Xaden washing Violet’s hair? *chefs kiss*. Calling her “love”? Instant dopamine. I need these two like I need air.

Violet being the most intelligent person in every room. If I wasn’t in love with her before, I am now. I was eating up every moment of her verbally taking down people in positions of power, and she fucking killed it in this book. My personal favourites include telling Halden her plan for the quest squad and getting her way, outsmarting and poisoning the triumvirate, and her monologue to the riders and fliers at the beginning of the book. And Xaden just sitting back and watching and being so proud of her 🥺.

Xaden. Ugh, I adore him. I don’t even feel the need to explain this one. Him having infinite faith in Violet’s ideas and plans, being willing to do anything to protect her, throwing Halden into a wall with his shadows, being 100% down to marry Violet whenever and wherever. He’s still such a drama queen, but I love him.

3 things I didn’t love

That one scene where Violet falls off Tairn and into Xaden’s arms and says “my, my, what else can you do with those shadows” or something. This is so specific, but I got insane second hand embarrassment and had to shut the book because I was cringing so much.

The multiple POVs. Xaden’s, I understand. That happens every book. But Rhiannon’s and Imogen’s just felt so out of place and unnecessary and just really took me out of the story. I think they’re both great characters, but I don't care about their stories like I do Violet’s. I’m going to be so disappointed if RY decides to do multiple POV again in book 4 with anyone other than Xaden and Violet because I think it could genuinely ruin the series.

The plot felt a little episodic. Especially when they were in the Isle Kingdoms (unfortunate, as some of my favourite moments took place here), just going one island to another, meeting new people who all worshipped a different god and had a different trial they had to undergo and a different government system and a different personality type… I just felt a little overwhelmed by the worldbuilding sometimes.

Anyway, I’m not going to emotionally recover for at least a week from binge reading this book, and basically just needed to blurt my thoughts somewhere to clear my head before I forget them all. I hope no one is too emotionally drained from reading Onyx Storm (that’s a lie, you all had better be suffering along with me).

[yuna542]

[10.]

~Fire & Water~

Pairing: JJ Maybank x Reader/Oc

Genre: Fluff, Enemies to Lovers, Smut, Angst, Drama, Action

Warnings: Suggestive comments, mentions of alcohol and drugs

Taglist: Open

Word count: 2.4k

Summary: The Kook princess is back after a year and reignites the war between Pogues and Kooks on Kildare. But she quickly realizes that after this year, nothing is the same as before. Deception, secrets from the past, and dangerous conspiracies sweep across Kildare, leaving her no choice but to work with the Pogues and her personal nemesis to find the truth and maybe even $8 million. A dangerous treasure hunt begins that turns her world upside down.

Soundtrack:

⏯️Play: I Feel Like I‘m Drowning by Two Feet

„You're a poison and I know that is the truth

All my friends think you're vicious

And they say you're suspicious

You keep dreaming and dark scheming“

"What?" was the only thing I managed to get out before I ran as if into a wall of pure heat.

The water steam was so thick that at first I could only perceive Sky's figure in a blur on one of the wooden benches.

She had wrapped a towel around her upper body and elegantly crossed her legs. She looked like I imagined one of those water nymphs out of the history books we read the other day in history class. Or a siren who lures the fishermen with her lovely voice and condemns them to death. Beautiful but poisonous.

Since I never have been in a sauna before, I had underestimated the temperature. Immediately my shirt stuck to my body and the high humidity made it hard to breathe.

But I didn't let that get to me. Her foot bobbed up and down waiting, while she leaned back and supported herself with her arms.

While sweat was directly on my forehead, the heat was not visible on her.

"Keep your hands off him! He doesn't see that you're just playing with him...", I pressed out, gradually getting used to the damp in the air.

Slowly, I walked toward her until I was close enough to see her sharply. Her body glistened like caramel and she wore small drops of water like expensive jewellery on her bare skin.

"Why? He's like a cute puppy. You just have to play with him! Routledge deserves a little fun too, doesn't he?"

I gritted my teeth at the thought of Sky messing around with John. Otherwise, I didn't begrudge him anything or any fun he wanted, but Skylar Diaz was a different story.

The girl was a Kook and therefore the enemy. Yes, she was even the leader of the Kooks and thus the most arrogant being that walked on Figure Eigth.

Her serious expression softened and she smirked at my stern look. I could have slapped myself for only now realizing that she was playing with my mind again.

She hadn't intended John B to follow her at all. Luring him into the dressing room had served solely to get me to come to the sauna.

But why all this?

A question I asked myself more and more often in her affairs. I could only guess what was going on in her head.

"He's my friend and I don't want his heart to be broken," I answered her question truthfully, noting that she had taken off all her jewelry except for her necklace with the silver pendant.

I wondered what its significance was if she didn't even take it off in the sauna.

She tilted her head and now I also recognized the moisture on her cheeks that made her soft freckles shine.

"What about your heart?" she asked suddenly.

Completely distracted by her long legs, I lifted my gaze until I reached the hem of the towel and gradually ran out of breath in the shirt.

"It can't be broken," I replied coolly, earning an inquiring look. The corner of her mouth lifted and I felt stupid.

"Are you sure about that? Not even from Layla? You seemed to have hit it off pretty well with her."

When I just frowned in confusion, she snorted, shaking her head.

"Unbelievable... That pretty blonde you were flirting with out by the pool," she helped me up and that's when I remembered her.

With a name starting with L, I had been close after all. However, I had already completely forgotten the short flirt.

Then I noticed that Sky must have been watching me without me knowing and that made the whole situation a lot worse.

Not only had she used Rafe for her revenge so she could get the keys and lure me to her party, but in addition she had manipulated me all evening until I had done exactly what she wanted.

Surprised by her abilities, I could only stare at her. Her power over people was making itself felt again now.

"Remembering all the girls' names and faces would be too much to ask, of course," she muttered provocatively, which gradually drove anger into my stomach.

However, I was angry at myself for letting her play with me like that. This was all payback for the fight and I couldn't help but admire her psychological warfare.

She played with the hem of her towel and slowly pulled it up. Panicked, I crossed my arms and suddenly didn't know where to put my eyes.

I should just leave, but my legs refused to comply with the command from my mind.

"Did you take drugs?", I asked, thinking about the cocaine on the table and unable to explain her behavior any other way.

"Sure. This is a party, JJ!"

She sounded like she was reminding me that the sky was blue or the water was wet.

My head was in chaos and I didn't know how to process it all. With any other girl, I would have jumped at the chance to be alone with her in a sauna. But Sky was not a normal girl. She was dangerous and the fact that my confident facade was starting to crumble in front of her made me feel insecure and I hated that feeling even more.

She was like an uncontrolled fire that you could easily burn yourself on if you were careless just for a second.

The heat didn't let me think clearly and as she kept pulling the towel up, I was completely overwhelmed with all the perceptions that suddenly hit me.

The more skin she exposed, the faster my heart raced.

"Stop it!"

"Why? Am I making you nervous?"

"No..."

On her face that cheeky smile spread and when she stood up and suddenly was directly in front of me, I thought I could hear my heart pounding in my ears.

"Good, then I'm sure you won't have a problem with it."

Before I could ask what she meant, she dropped the towel and something exploded in my head.

Now she was standing in front of me in just a pair of red panties and I forced myself with all my might not to let my gaze wander downward.

Instead, I fixed her eyes, which bored mercilessly into mine and seemed to be searching for the slightest weakness.

I did not notice her touch on my face until she had already lifted her arm.

Her lips were slightly parted and her pupils were as big as buttons.

Her fingertips moved feather lightly over my jaw along the bruises and over the chapped area on my lip.

Her skin seemed electrically charged, causing a tingling heat that was completely different from the one in the sauna.

"There was no fear in your eyes..."

Although the injuries on my face were very sensitive, her touch even gave me a little relief.

"That's hot," she whispered, more to herself.

The drug was apparently messing with her brainwaves.

I wanted to hurl a blunt reply at her, but something in her face stopped me.

Sky Diaz was standing in front of me almost completely naked and the only thing I could think about was how her warm skin would feel under my fingers.

Shocked at my own thoughts, I shook my head to get rid of them and ran my hands through my hair as I stared at the ceiling before giving in to the seductive desire and unabashedly looking at her body.

"Holy shit... If someone comes in," I gasped, not daring to lower my gaze. She was completely on drugs and drunk. I couldn't explain it any other way.

Part of me still expected to just wake up.

"This is my house and it's a fucking sauna. You don't normally wear clothes here. "Normally, you're not that prudish."."

It sounded like an accusation, so I laughed softly without taking my eyes off the ceiling.

Again, that arrogant tone of voice, goading me to try to beat the snobbery and confidence out of her.

Her mere presence was enough to wreak havoc with the alcohol in my blood that felt right in my lower abdomen.

"I'm not going to take my clothes off!", I smirked, noticing her sitting back down on the wooden bench. By now the heat was unbearable.

Both the one on the outside and the one inside me.

So I tore myself away and turned around so I could finally leave, as I should have been doing all along.

Before I touched the door handle, I heard her say:

"Too bad... And it was just getting interesting.

I thought you wouldn't be such a coward..."

With that she hit a weak point of mine. I was many things, but cowardly certainly not. The challenging tone in her voice stirred my fighting spirit and I wasn't going to let that sit with me like that.

"I'm not a coward," I retorted firmly, still turning my back on her.

"Then prove it!"

The next challenge. Angrily, I pulled my shirt over my head and opened the door, only to toss it in front next to her dress.

Then I turned to her and raised my hands in a waiting manner.

"Satisfied?", I asked mockingly and at that moment the sight of her hit me like a punch right in the face.

Overwhelmed, I could not look away this time and my eyes wandered endlessly along her curves.

I expelled the air through my nose again and saw that she was also looking at my body curiously.

The energy in the small room charged electrically and the tension was breathtaking as she unconsciously bit her lower lip.

"Mhmm, I'm starting to understand the other girls," she murmured more to herself, the alcohol clouding my mind too much to be vain.

Slowly I came back over to her and stopped close in front of her so that our legs were almost touching. She looked up at me from below and the sight sent a wave of heat through my body.

"I'd love to know what your boyfriend would say about that," I mused aloud, and that's when she stood up. Her breasts would fit perfectly into my palms. Would they be as soft as they looked?

Her nose was only a finger's width from mine and feeling her heated body so close to mine gave me goosebumps.

I would only have to lift my hand slightly to touch her thigh and just the idea of touching her breasts made my head feel like it was about to burst.

"Rafe is not my boyfriend."

Everything in me screamed to flee, but my body didn't respond one bit. Instead, I felt her fingertips lightly stroking my abs. Her eyes were unnaturally restless, trying to scrutinize every detail of my face.

"Has JJ Maybank lost his tongue, or something?" she asked softly, a tingle spreading wherever she touched me.

"You're a witch," was the only thing I could get out. It was the only thing that would explain my condition.

The desire to touch her became so strong that I had to restrain myself with all my might. None of this was allowed to happen.

"And you are an idiot."

The tension between us made it harder and harder to control myself and I just didn't understand why I wanted to touch her so badly. Should I give in to this desire, I had lost the game and I couldn't let that happen.

Never before had I had so little control over my body and I didn't understand it at all. It scared the shit out of me.

Strange thoughts forced themselves upon me.

I wondered how her lips felt, if she tasted as sweet as she smelled, and if she had goose bumps all over her body too.

Breathing heavily, I pushed the thoughts away and took a big step back.

"I need my key," I muttered, trying to ignore all the strange feelings. The fluttering in my chest, the thoughts, and even the tension finally subsided as I put a few more steps of distance between us.

For a moment she was silent and just looked at me. Then the cool expression on her face was back and I wondered if I had imagined it all.

"All right asshole."

She sounded rushed and ran past me to slip through the door as quickly as possible. Confused, I looked after her and only then did I remember that she was wearing nothing but panties.

"What are you doing?", I exclaimed as I followed her into the dressing room.

The sudden change in temperature made me breathe a sigh of relief and the air was pleasantly cool on my skin.

"I'm getting your stupid key so you can finally piss off."

She was a changed woman. The brief moment had only lasted a few seconds, but in that moment I had seen a different girl. A vulnerable and emotional girl. For a blink of an eye, so much pain had flashed through her eyes. However, the moment had been so brief that I already thought I had imagined it.

"At least put some clothes on!"

She laughed derisively and crossed her arms.

"You don't get to tell me what to do, Maybank!

I picked up my shirt and thrust it into her hand.

"Put this on!", I said authoritatively, surprising myself with the dominance in my voice.

Sure enough, after a moment's hesitation, she took my shirt and pulled it over her head.

It was too big for her, of course, and just reached her thighs.

Nevertheless, her curves were clearly visible underneath and the strange feeling in my chest returned abruptly when she stroked a strand of hair behind her ear and tugged at my shirt.

Then she turned around and just left me standing there, without a clue what just happened.

⬇️

© Yuna542 — 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.

[echoingbirdsofprey]

Lightning On My Lips (Every Time You Kiss Me)

26 - Empty The Bottle And Empty My Soul

Pairing: Tyler Owens x OFC Georgia Tennley-Owens

Rating: Explicit (MDNI!)

Warnings: Alcohol comsumption, medical crap, mentions of suicidal ideation, mentions of SMUT

A/N: This should read like a series of bad dreams that neither Georgia or Tyler can wake up from. Lots of mutual pining and no actions. Don't think that Georgia doesn't feel bad for what she did. She does. Tyler was a fucking mess. Thank you y'all for reading and continung to read! As always comments, likes, reblogs, and any feedback is super appreciated! Hope y'all enjoy this one!

Tags: @mrsevans90 @djs8891 @gpsmississippihippie @barnesboo1967 @dizzybee03 @coloraturadiva @kmc1989

Tyler laid uncomfortably in his bed, running his hand over the cut on his head. He traced it lightly with his fingertips and it seared with pain when he did. It was throbbing and the pain killers weren't doing shit for him. This was the last time, he vowed, the last time he'd get staples in his head for riding a bull. The last time he'd get stitches for opening up his skin on a fence. The last time he'd get a cast or a sling for breaking something. This was it. He was done. He needed to do something else because now he'd lost the love of his life and his riding career was pretty much over. He wouldn't live long enough to do what he's dreamed of his entire life if he didn't stop.

But he hated all of that. And the part he hated the most was that he'd lost Georgia.

“Why'd she leave?” He asked, sitting up, while groaning in pain.

“All she said was she couldn't lose someone else. I didn't ask her what that meant. I'm so sorry T. She said she loved you.” Boone said, as he shifted in his chair. He knew the biggest thing his friend needed right now was support and it was kind of shitty that Georgia left. She’d probably even admit that. But as the days stretched on and Tyler became more cognizant of what his life was really going to be like for a long while, he even commended her for leaving.

“Well a lotta good that does me now!” He exclaimed, slamming a fist on the bed, Agony radiated throughout his entire body and he yelped. 

“T, easy. Ya gotta chill.” Boone stood and made a calming gesture with his hands. 

“Why Boone? I'm fuckin’ done. I can't walk. Can't go anywhere. What the fuck use am I now? I'm glad she fuckin’ left. She doesn't havta see me like this, all broken and fucked up.” Tyler said, laying back down. He huffed in frustration.

“T, seriously man. It'll be okay. Just gonna be a long road.” Boone said, fidgeting in his seat, uncomfortable at Tyler’s burst of anger. He’d seen the bull rider get mad before but not like this. There was a ferality in his eyes that Boone wasn’t sure he was okay with in that moment.

“Nah, Boone. This is dumb. I...I gotta find somethin’ else man...what am I supposed to do sittin’ in a fuckin’ bed rottin’ away.” Tyler shifted again, grabbing the cup of water from the tray in front of him and chucking it across the room. It landed with a splash and Tyler cried out in pain.

“Tyler...I'm sorry.” Boone didn’t know what to say or do to help his friend, so he decided just being there was going to have to be enough for now.

🌪️🛻🌪️

“FUCK THIS.” Tyler yelled, throwing the book he’d had his nose in for nearly three hours, across his room. It thudded against the wall and Boone ran up the stairs as quickly as he could. He’d been in the process of making his best friend lunch. Tyler was studying for an exam. A college exam. While he was laid up, he’d decided the best use of his time was to go to school. If he couldn’t exercise his body, at least he could exercise his mind. 

“What’s wrong, T?” Boone burst into the room and saw Tyler wheeling his chair backwards. 

“Fuckin’ cloud microphysics...pissin’ me the fuck off. I don’t get it.” Tyler said, slamming the wheelchair into the bed frame, the impact radiating up through the chair and into Tyler’s taxed body. 

“Can you be a lil’ less aggressive with the chair, T? You’re gonna break it and need a new one.” Boone pulled the chair slightly away from the bed.

“Maybe if I fuckin’ break it they won’t give me a new one.” Tyler glared at him.

“Then how you gon’ get ‘round?” Boone asked, knowing what his friend was hinting at. He would have to let the therapist know.

“I won’t. I’ll just heal or I’ll die. Who cares at this point.” His statement hurt Boone to his core. He knew someone that would care, but damn if he knew how to contact her, He’d tried and it came up as an out of service number. Maybe she had to get a new phone. Maybe she changed her number on purpose. Maybe she stopped paying the bill. There were a million reasons but there was only one that he cared about. Boone was banking on her coming back at some point. It would help Tyler. 

🌪️🛻🌪️

“You’re gonna graduate in that fuckin’ chair if you don’t start tryin’ a lil’ harder.” Jake said to his brother, offering an arm and that was it. He wanted Tyler to be rageful, so that he would try to stand and maybe punch him. But Tyler had become complacent and it killed Jake to see him this way.

“Do you understand how much pain I’m in?” Tyler asked, glancing at his brother before gripping tightly to his arm.

“I don’t give a fuck. Get up.” Jake scolded him and helped pull him to his feet. “You’re supposed to be trying to walk. Let’s go.” 

“FUCK. It hurts, Jake!” Tyler yelped, nearly collapsing. Jake caught him and pulled him back up.

“I know it does but you have to try.” Jake said, helping Tyler straighten back up. “You wanna fuck a girl again?”

“I mean...yeah...” Tyler’s brows furrowed.

“Then you have to walk!” Jake exclaimed, pulling his hands away from Tyler. He wobbled as Jake backed away. “Walk to me.” Jake said, motioning for Tyler to go toward him. Tyler focused hard on Jake, taking a couple of heavy steps. He sighed and his breath shuddered. Jake stepped over and held his brother. “You’re okay, T. You’re okay.” 

Jake knew he was struggling. Tyler had begun standing in physical therapy but he needed help at home with it. Boone had been able to for a while, but he also had to go back to work so he could make a bit of a living too. Jake had come back from a deployment just in time to help take care of Tyler. 

Tyler couldn’t control his emotions. He began sobbing against Jake’s chest.

“I can’t do this Jake. I’m in so much pain. I just want to end it.” Tyler said between sobs and Jake guided him back to the bed. Tyler folded into his brother like a child, burying his face in his neck.

“You can’t, T. I need my wingman. You can get through this. I know it hurts. I can feel you shaking. But you’ve gotta push through. Its the only way those muscles are gonna come back.” Jake rubbed his brother’s back. Tyler’s muscles were spasming and he was sweating. He’d been in the wheelchair for so many months that most of his muscles had atrophied to a point where any physical activity was difficult. Tyler was thin and weak and it horrified Jake to see his brother that way.

“Jake...if I asked you..” Tyler began and Jake cut him off.

“I’m not helping you end it. I’m helping you live, T. Stop being selfish. You’ve been through harder shit than this. Pull yourself together. For me.” Jake and Tyler’s eyes met. “Do you still want to have a house, and the girl, and kids, and all of that? How you gonna get that  if you don’t get through this.”

“How can I have any of that...she left me.” Tyler said and Jake scoffed.

“She’s not the only girl in the world, T.” Jake said softly.

“No, but she’s the only one I want.” Tyler said.

“How do you know that?” Jake asked.

“When you know, you know. And I fuckin’ know.”  Tyler affirmed and Jake shook his head but then puzzled through a solution.

“Well then T, if she’s the only one for you and you know, then you gotta get her back. You gotta work to do that. She ain’t gonna want a fuckin’ cripple. And you can’t make babies and maintain a house and all that other shit like this. So pull yourself together and remember what you want. If you want all of that, then go get it. Make it happen. Get better so that you can have everything you want.” 

🌪️🛻🌪️

Tyler had agreed to go on one date, set up by Boone with a girl from his Computer Modeling class. Talia was cute, a tiny blonde with glasses, little tits and a small ass. Not Tyler's type at all. There was only one girl that was his type.

The whole time he was at dinner with her he couldn't help but think of how different she was to Georgia. Tyler, being the stud he was, could barely see past her body. Sure she was smart, probably smarter than him, but all he could think of was what she'd be like in bed. 

He had to get Georgia out of his head. But even as they headed back to her apartment, fumbling with the lock as they made out, Tyler thought of the beautiful blonde he'd loved before. Her curves, which this girl lacked. Georgia had perky, large breasts that fit perfectly in Tyler's large hands. Georgia had just enough around her hips that Tyler could grab on and not be worried he'd hurt her. Talia was all bones. And as he slipped the condom on and thrust inside the cute meteorology major, pain shot through his loins and immediately softened his length. He tried. He did. He just couldn't keep it up. By the time Talia orgasmed, Tyler's hips were screaming. He pulled out and panted and she went to the bathroom to rinse herself off. 

He gathered his clothes from the floor, trashed the condom, dressed and left. He sat in his truck at home, rubbing one out to an interview that Georgia had done for the NFR. He couldn't believe himself and how low he'd stooped. 

Tyler would pick a bottle of whiskey, vodka, or rum, sit out in a wheatfield at night in the back of his truck and drink himself to sleep. He’d look up at the sky, pray to God and the heavens above that Georgia would come back some day, but the alcohol always left him with no hope for that and a hell of a hangover in the morning.

🌪️🛻🌪️

He had an impressive archive after four years. Every run, every pickup, every exhibition, every interview. Even the silly English show she'd done. Gee looked damn good in breeches, he admitted. That was the only thing that had gotten him through school and his recovery, was being able to watch her succeed time and time again. But every time he went to comment on a post or DM her, his thumb would hover over the button and he just couldn't bring himself to send it.

He'd struggled with pain management throughout those four years, attempting to end his life twice because it had become unbearable. There were days that he woke up and could barely move. Then he had really good days where he'd thought maybe he'd hop on a horse at the local arena and rope the dummy a couple times. 

He'd been building a truck to start storm chasing. Boone had helped and they were looking for a team. They'd started a YouTube channel, he and Boone getting some wild chase videos. The one that went viral and put them on the map was just outside of Tulsa, after Tyler had installed the augers on the truck and they tested them for the first time.

It had been a long time coming, but that was really when Tyler began praying hard. Tyler would go out to some different wheat field, now only once a week and polish off a bottle of whiskey or rum, whatever he had on hand, and lay in the bed of his truck, mumbling to God and the heavens above about how he just wished he could have her back. He just wished she'd come back around and they could forget the past four years and go back to what they had. Tyler just wanted her. 

He was tired of the girls throwing themselves at him. Tired of taking them out and trying to learn what they liked and didn't like when he already knew Georgia. He didn't want some other girl. And he was tired of the meaningless sex. They only wanted to bang him so they could say they'd slept with a famous youtuber. He should be sponsored by a condom company with how many he used over the course of the four years. He was so done with girls trying to get in his pants that he started letting Georgia's name come from his lips as he came, if he came. He didnt give a fuck anymore. Sure, he felt bad when it happened, and he apologized but he just couldn't take it anymore. He was done with other girls. Time to focus on his career, which was on an upswing that he couldn’t deny.

🌪️🛻🌪️

She was miserable. She was burnt out. Exhausted. She'd run every bit of ground at every single rodeo in the country over the course of four years. And she still thought about Tyler every single day. He weighed heaviest on her mind. He was the piece pushed far in the back that pulled at her subconscious.

“What's wrong, sweets?” Skylar or Beau or Johnny or any of the hundred other bull riders or ropers would ask her, knowing she was distracted and Georgia would just shake her head. He didn't care. Not like Tyler did. No one cared like Tyler did.

And not one of these guys could give her release like Tyler could. Skylar thought he was God’s gift to women, and was always too rough, making her sore afterwards. She’d fucked around with Johnny a couple times and he was too boring. Beau was too wild, too erratic, barely could get her off, so she made it very clear she wasn’t interested in him. There was a guy that had come close to Tyler, but for whatever reason she would always go back to Skylar. Maybe she felt like she needed the punishment. She felt like she deserved to be in pain. 

When Georgia saw the Tornado Wranglers channel for the first time come across her YouTube suggestions, she gasped. He looked just the same as he had, but a little older. More mature, but still playful at heart. The banter between him and Boone made her smile. She watched every livestream that she could. And then when the channel hit a million subscribers, Georgia wanted to message him and congratulate him but she couldn't. 

With Tyler's YouTube fame, she figured she would be as insignificant as any random fan that messaged the channel. He wouldn't recognize her. She fucked up. Now she had to live with that. 

So she did the only thing she could do. Continue on.

🌪️🛻🌪️

She’d gotten a call from her mother, saying that she wanted help moving down to Florida. Eleanor didn’t want to deal with tornados anymore. Emmaleigh didn’t have time to help her with everything she and her husband were doing. 

So on the day, when Georgia brought the mares back home, let them out into the field by the barn and set up their stalls, it was her mother who came out to the barn for once.

“Hi honey.” She said softly, taking her daughter in a weak hug. 

“Hi momma.” Georgia said. They watched the mares for a moment and then her mother spoke.

“Came to bring me down to Florida?” She asked and Georgia shook her head. “And then what’ll you do after?”

“Probably come back here. I got a job offer from one of the local weather stations for camera work. Met one of the meteorologists while I was on the road.” Georgia explained, moving her tack into the barn.

“Yeah? That sounds good. No more competin’ then?” Eleanor asked, as the mare ran back towards the barn. She reached out to rub Twist, who nickered softly to her. Georgia threw a couple apples on the ground under the fence for the mares and then folded her arms across her chest.

“Momma. I need a break. I’m exhausted.” Georgia said, her tone flat. 

“I don’t think you’ll get much rest chasin’ storms either, sweetie.” Eleanor rubbed a hand over her daughter’s back and then glanced back at the truck and trailer.

“Maybe I'm hoping to find something or someone else while I’m doin’ it...” Georgia murmured as she began to walk back to the truck. Eleanor walked with her and spoke even softer then.

“Tyler.” She said and Georgia stopped dead in her tracks. Even after four years, she didn’t think her mother would remember him, but she did. 

“Momma I know what you’re gonna say.” Georgia leaned against her truck for a moment. Eleanor put her hands on her hips.

“All I’m gonna say is if that’s what you want...be prepared for him to not want you back honey. You know what you did. I love you. I do. I always will. But I also know that you know that boy deserves more than you gave him.” She said, then heading into the house, leaving Georgia to think about what she said. Her mother’s words stung and brought tears to Georgia's eyes. She was right. Why would she ever think Tyler would want her back after what she did to him?

[i-got-poisenality]

OK OK I SHOULD PROBABLY CALM DOWN WITH MY NEWSIES AU BUT ALSO I REFUSE TO DO THAT

ON THIS TOPIC: CRUTCHTRACK CENTRIC APOCALYPSE AU

(the idea for this came from a) a dream i had, b) overgrown garden by beetlebug, and c) current political events in the united states)

idk what kind of apocalypse this is, whether it’s zombies or what have you, but the main point is that things have gone to shit and the newsies are one of the groups trying to survive

fair warning, most of this is raw material from my dream so it’s gonna sound strange

basing the first plot point off the strange dream that i had last night (i was Race in this dream btw lol), the newsies are camping out in an abandoned mansion. i’m gonna say this was Pulitzer’s mansion but he’s dead now so Kath claimed it in the name of newsies. anyways, somehow something happens that starts a countdown to the mansion blowing up (i’ll refine this later but i liked the idea of dramatically splitting the party), so people booked it, everyone was shouting to get out and three main groups form based on who goes through which exit. one is lead by Davey, one by Sarah, and the last (our pov group) is lead by Jack and notably contains Kath Race Crutchie and Les

our pov group ends up needing to use this weird tunnel system to get out, Race is taking up the rear of the group mainly because he’s trying to make sure Crutchie stays with them and doesn’t fall behind (not in an ableist way, he’s just concerned that his best friend/love interest isn’t the fastest and that could result in actual death)

anyways, they get outside and run to some shelter behind the walls of a ruined house

but Les isn’t there

Crutchie ends up rushing back to the tunnel that’s gonna explode soon on pure instinct to try to save Les

all that the rest of the group can do is wait

then the blast comes and neither Crutchie nor Les is back (don’t worry! they’re both alive! but they do get separated from the rest of the group and everyone thinks they’re dead for a little while)

Race refuses to believe they’re dead and frantically digs through the rubble of the tunnel to try to find them, he can’t and Kath Jack and Race hold a small funeral

HOWEVER!! jumping back to when Crutchie runs back into the tunnel for Les

(and please bear with me this is such a rough draft i just need to split the party)

he finds him a little while back in a more solid and natural looking branch off of the tunnel but the main tunnel is already shaking with the impact of the explosion and beginning to collapse, too far back in the tunnel to definitely make it out, they take the smaller, hopefully more solid tunnel as quickly as they can

they do make it out but they’re pretty far away from where the rest of Jack’s group is

by the time they make it over to where Jacks group was, they’d left

the first main objective is to reunite Crutchie and Les with the rest of the group and eventually to bring all three groups back together

then it’ll be surviving and finding a new, safe place to live

also i promise that i’ll clean up the details of this, most of this came from a dream and you know how those are so i have to make the plot more solid and believable

send me asks if you wanna know anything else about it or any specific character details (please i’m begging you)