#they just happen to know absolutely EVERYTHING abt a very violent character
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Which one of your mutuals are you bringing to the arena in the hunger games in order to win
honestly, almost none of us have any survival skills. most of my moots are like, 14 :)
tbh, either @green-binder (knows a fuckton abt weaponry), @yelenapines (kinda gives off badass vibes), or @i-eat-so-much-grass (seems slightly feral in the best way /j)
this is actually such a cool question, thanks!!!!
#asks#anon ask#JUST FOR THE RECORD#greenie is amazing and super sweet-i promise they're not some kind of gun freak#they just happen to know absolutely EVERYTHING abt a very violent character#ines is SO cool. like SO cool#flynn i'm joking-we haven't talked that much but you seem very cool!#i'm mainly going off you weeding (eating) my garden in the most chaotic way possible
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idk if you've talked or written abt this before, but what's your take on jackie's potential for cannibalism? i feel like most of the fandom parrots the "laura lee and jackie had to die first bc they would never have done cannibalism" , which kinda tracks but also kinda feels simplistic (and boring). like i don't think any of the girls would've even considered it until they were in such a fucked up situation, so if you put her through the right circumstances i feel like jackie could've gotten there (and im sure laura lee would've, even easier than jackie)
like i think a lot about how easy it could've been for jackie&shauna's fates to have been reversed, and if it were shauna who froze and jackie who went two more months without food while trying to live with the grief of losing shauna by talking to her corpse, i could absolutely see jackie starting to eat her. biggest difference being jackie would definitely not end up sharing bc she'd be very possessive abt being the only one to get to consume shauna
THAT'S 👏 SIMPLISTIC 👏 AND 👏 BORING 👏
thank you so much for asking because that's seriously such a good question. i've thought and talked and written a lot about laura lee going down the cannibalism rabbit hole, and even making the most of it (for catholiscism reasons!) but we should all be talking more about the endless possibilities of jackie's cannibalism era <3
the thing is these are all just fun possibilities to think about! there's no right answer! sure, it makes sense that jackie (and laura lee) died before the cannibalism because as characters they represents things that would go against it. but aren't we playing with dolls here? can't we consider all the possibilities? even if they aren't so likely?? because isn't the thing about cannibalism for survival that all of them would do it if it came down to it? and asking what would be the extreme circumstance that would push them there?
for jackie the obvious answer is shauna, always, for all questions tbh. her downfall wasn't the rejection of cannibalism not even the rejection of the wilderness stuff, it was shauna. at least mostly. it was shauna's betrayal and the fight with shauna which took away her will to live. at least mostly! but what if instead shauna had continued to be jackie's reason or at least escouragement to stay alive
i'm not the first one to say that jackie would've gone all out as step father to that baby (if somehow idk it wasn't jeffs or they got over it). she would've done everything to secure shauna and the baby's survival, and yeah i think that includes cannibalism!!
and let's even be generous to jackie and say shauna wasn't her entire world (she was but if there's space for an extra 1%) she was also a very commited team captain! along with shauna, the group also kinda betrayed her, discarded her, move on and away from her. but!! what if that hadn't happened? what if by some miracle instead of losing everything, jackie had come through as team captain in the wilderness, commited to keeping them all alive no matter what, used the influence she thought she had or at least used to have back home? she would lead, organize, talk them through it, make sure that all of them participated to stay alive
and who knows! girly might have even come up with more uh civilized ways of choosing a meal i mean victim. jackie taylor might have revolutionized survival and started an ethical cannibalism business in the wilderness! let's all give her the benifit of the doubt and a little credit as team captain and let her thrive a little!
also yeah 100% agree with you on her being too possessive of shauna's corpse to share lmao do you think that girl would've let anyone get a bite of shauna shipma??? be real. she was violently jealous of every person that laid eyes on shauna
#is this something#i'm rambling and uhhhhhhhh#anyway!!#thanks for asking anon!!! love you!!!!#answered#anon#yellowjackets#jackie taylor#shaunajackie
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hello!!! i’ve been going through ur blog all day and i am so in awe of ur incredible knowledge and interpretations of themes narratives and symbolism in asoiaf like. ur writing is soooo beautiful and haunting and just spectacularly wonderful! all of ur metas on different regions/places/cultures/characters (especially harrenhal) is just honestly inspiring like my brain has been going Insane all day (in the absolute best way.) i would loooove to hear ur interpretations or thoughts on the vale and the arryns! i feel like regionally they’re very underrated and super interesting given their historical mythological figures (like alyssa arryn) and their piety towards the faith!! they’re haughty and snobby and their refusal to divert from tradition is just v cool to me. i would love to hear ur take!! (ps thank u for all ur content it has made my day and opened my mind <3)
the vale! it took me a while to come around to it honestly. it’s very gothic, not in the haunted way but the trapped in a cold cavernous mansion with your evil weird extended family way. I think it goes along with the deconstruction of chivalry and knighthood happening throughout the series- this place with a reputation for noble knights and raising heroes is actually hollow and falling in on itself- the nobility is a facade, everyone has an agenda, and no one says what they mean. The House of Arryn has fallen into complete and probably unsalvageable decline. Jon Arryn’s planning arguably caused every conflict in the series but the Others and he is dead before the series even starts.
They’re not quite into Southern politics like the Reach and Crownlands, where people lie and change loyalties very easily, but politics in the sense where everyone has a fixed role that they lie to keep up. I think it’s telling that they respect widowhood and widows ruling more than the other kingdoms (unlike cersei and catelyn where they say well you’re a woman first and thus not worthy of respect)- once you’ve stepped into that role of wife, you command respect even after you become a widow. All the Vale houses have been involved in this game of scrabbling for favor with the Arryns where everyone knows and respects the ‘rules’ which has gone on for so long because people act with subtle moves and thinly veiled everything.
I think their refusal to change out of pride and distance is super interesting especially when you compare it to the riverlands, which never changes because of the cycle of feudal violence. Harrenhal and the Eyrie were in very similar situations during the Conquest, these huge castles that thought they were above reproach which would subsequently get owned by their inability to account for dragons. But Harrenhal’s destruction is violent, and the Eyrie’s is political, through the use of an unspoken threat (visenya taking Sharra Arryn’s son for a dragon ride.) If the Riverlands are haunted, the Eyrie is hollow and empty. They’re also still locked in an ongoing conflict with the hill tribes, the original inhabitants of the vale that the Arryns and the rest of the Andals colonized. I think battle continues because having social roles of “civilized” and “uncivilized” benefits the Arryns far more than driving the hill tribes out entirely.
So yeah initially i didn’t rlly think too much abt thee Arryns and vale politics but in thinking abt how to respond to this i totally see how they are rlly interesting esp as part of that knighthood deconstruction. SO excited to see what Alayne Stone does with them next book :)
#not even gonna lie the first time i read asoiaf i saw the vale and was like ew these ppl are yankees these r wasps.#noble family of knights who is in tragic decline and sits out the war!!!!!!!#thank u anon u made me think abt this much much more
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Please use this to go in detail abt why you think Raiden is one of most decent and kindest of the mgs characters I need to hear from the foremost Raiden Expert(tm)
okay so first of all i'm going to print this ask and put it on my wall like a doctoral certificate, anon-certified Foremost Raiden Expert(tm) /joke but i am quite flattered by this description.
now to what you came for. i shall go into detail on this subject and i shall do it by going through his entire canon timeline. let's fucking go. reminder that this is going to get into in-depth descriptions of all the fucked up parts of raiden's storyline (of which there are many) so read with caution. if you want mood music then just put this video on loop and you're good to go
so obviously we don't know anything about what raiden was like when he was very very young before solidus got to him. presumably he was a sweet kid though. i mean he was probably like five or six when everything started going to hell. that's around the time that most kids learn to read. (although personally i hc him as getting an early start on that because the other likely option is too depressing. he's got enough going on already.) my point is i bet he was a good kid. of course then solidus happened, and we all know how that went. if anyone blames raiden for what happened at that point then they can fucking fight me, he was a scared little kid who was horribly abused, kept drugged, and probably full-on brainwashed into fighting a war that had nothing to do with him because otherwise he would die. that has absolutely no bearing on his personality except as a contrast which we will get into later. moving along to the next part of his life that we know.
so he repressed his memories of the war (with 'help' from the patriots) and tried (largely unsuccessfully) to live a normal life. we know even at that point that his view of himself was fucked up, and he was having nightmares constantly enough that he had at least vague memories, although he didn't understand them. (yet.) and yet he knows enough to hate his own past and want to keep it a secret, because even if he doesn't understand it, he knows it's awful. keep that in mind. once he was presumably deprogrammed from solidus's bullshit, he regretted and hated everything he did, and himself for doing it (even though it was not his fault in the slightest). despite everything, he becomes a very different person with a much more fully formed moral compass. rose describes him quite unflatteringly at this point in his life but let's be real. it's rose. can't take a word she says at face value unless it's backed up by someone who doesn't spend practically all of their screen time lying through their teeth. also does 'horribly cold' with a 'violent nature' and an 'empty heart' actually sound that much like raiden to you? because if it does then stay tuned, it won't by the end of this post (and if it still does then you weren't paying attention, go back and read it again)
so we reach mgs2. at this point raiden is probably around 26 years old and doesn't remember half of his life, which really does a number on your mental stability and sense of identity. keep in mind also that he did not get the opportunity to mentally and emotionally develop in the same way as the average individual, on account of, you know, being brainwashed into a remorseless killer. he had to relearn (or learn for the first time) a lot of concepts including things that most of us take as a given (the very idea of right and wrong, which certainly wouldn't have been a luxury afforded to him during the war.) some quick equations suggest that he was fourteen at the end of the war, so he's had twelve years to learn all this instead of twenty-six. (with that in mind, he's doing remarkably well.)
(note here please that i do not count optional things that the player can do towards characterization. cutscenes or it didn't happen. that's an exaggeration, but you get my point. i'm not about to claim raiden is some kind of weird sadist who enjoys killing seagulls and will cheerfully shoot snake while he's sleeping. that would be fucked up and also blatantly in contradiction of actual canon characterization.)
right off the bat he immediately displays concern for rose's wellbeing considering that she's an analyst being suddenly involved in an extremely intense field mission. actually, a lot of his interactions with her throughout the game are further evidence in his favor--he can't even bring himself to tell her that she can't cook! (maybe a bit too nice for his own good.)
he also has a memorable conversation with snake (in his disguise as pliskin) in which he displays horror at how 'pliskin' utterly brushes off the deaths of his 'friends'. he feels sadness at the loss of these men he's literally never interacted with, and is shocked that their supposed friend doesn't. this is pretty typical of him moving forward.
he even displays genuine concern for president johnson, including after what the bastard did to him. (definitely too nice for his own good.) i could get further into this scene but i don't want to talk about it. fuckin' hate it here.
next, emma. this one is a hallmark moment in terms of him being kind. it stands out. emma is terrified of water, and he needs to get her through flooded corridors in order to try and stop arsenal gear. he could be a complete asshole here and do something like knock her out and take her then, or get mad at her and tell her to get over it (which... i'm going to be real... sounds a lot more like something snake might do). but he doesn't. he's incredibly patient with her and helps calm her down and even comes up with a way to help minimize her fear so that she can get through it without even having to look at the water. he even listens to her talk about her childhood and attempts to empathize with her despite the fact that he can't even remember his own. it's a really sweet moment from him and it cannot be overlooked.
continuing on. he immediately forgives snake for turning on him (even though it could have gotten him killed) and tells olga that no one can blame her for doing horrible things while trying to protect her child. he seems truly upset at her later death. and he still worries about rose even after he finds out she's been lying to him and using him for the past two years. and he immediately volunteers to help snake and otacon again at the end of the game--if snake hadn't flat-out refused him, he might have stuck with them for quite a while.
all in all, mgs2 paints us a picture of a deeply troubled man who still shows genuine kindness and concern for the people around him, even those who hurt him, and in incredibly stressful situations on top of that. and it just keeps going!
now, we don't have a whole lot of info on what happened to him between mgs2 and mgs4 (and most of what we do have comes from rose, who, again, is the very definition of an unreliable source.) what we do know for certain, however, paints another very flattering picture.
i do fully believe that his mental health spiraled after mgs2. how could it not, after all the shit he went through? he had years of horrific trauma shoved in his face and then went through some more incredibly traumatic events on top of that. and then rose lies about having a miscarriage. for any excited future parent, but especially for someone who loves kids as much as raiden clearly does, this would have been yet another level of pure devastation. and yet in the middle of all this, what does he do? he goes to repay the woman who saved his life, takes on an incredibly dangerous mission going up against the people who used him like a pawn for years and dehumanized him to hell and back (one that snake had even said he'd handle himself) and rescues sunny. when his health starts to get worse, he leaves her with people he trusts.
and then he gets forcibly converted into a cyborg, an act which would play into his deepest fears about himself. it would have been completely understandable at this point if he'd just given up entirely; after all the horror he's been through, it's a miracle that he's even alive, much less fighting. but no. instead he turns the patriots' own actions against them and goes to protect snake.
it is important to consider that many of his actions during this game are also driven by his intense depression, ptsd, and self-hatred, along with the other plethora of mental health issues that come part and parcel with everything he's been through. but at the same time, it's impossible to deny that his actions show a genuine care for others. he doesn't have to. no one would blame him if he didn't. but he's still willing to sacrifice everything and suffer horrible pain in order to protect everyone. even when he's scared. even when it would certainly kill him in a horrific way.
also, i can't ignore the fact that he thinks of sunny and how much she cares about him on shadow moses island. he apologizes to her before cutting his own arm off. he's thinking about how upset she'd be to see him hurt. there are a thousand other things he could be thinking about, but he thinks about her, and feels guilty for doing something that will hurt her, too. (they are siblings, your honor.)
the ending of the game is another example of him being too nice for his own good because really after two games of being lied to and manipulated by rose no one would blame him for cutting her out of his life. but he doesn't. he forgives her, again. and let's not forget the love and care with which he treats his son even though they've never met before. (raiden dad of the year award. dad of the ever, actually.)
now for the most controversial part. revengeance.
this is about the point where a concerning number of people start characterizing raiden as this trigger-happy sadomasochistic lunatic who just wants to slaughter everything in his path. either that, or they're saying he has a split personality who is a trigger-happy sadomasochistic lunatic who just wants to slaughter everything in his path, which is even worse, because it's bullshit AND it's playing into harmful and completely inaccurate stereotypes. let's not do that. and also characterization-wise it's just plain wrong. (but my essay on the true nature of raiden's fragmented identity can wait for another day.)
but i counter this errant belief with the argument that in fact, revengeance is perhaps the biggest example as to why raiden is one of the most moral and kindhearted characters in the series.
from the beginning, we find out that he's taken a job with a pmc to provide for his family. not exactly his dream environment. he's trying to keep it as combat-free as possible ('one sword keeps another in the sheath') but obviously that doesn't work out so well for him.
(as a side note, the serial markings on his body in the prologue are the only ones that don't majorly piss me off. they have the numbers, but then they say 'protector'. and i know they aren't actually referring to him as a person, but... damn right he is. he's earned that label, 100%.)
people act like he totally snaps after n'mani is killed, but that's just not true. his mental health does start to spiral somewhat, but it mostly manifests in him mimicking society's dehumanization of both hostile cyborgs and himself. (he starts slipping back into treating himself as a weapon. never a good sign with him.) he's angry, but he's just as angry with himself as he is with desperado, and he isn't intentionally targeting them; it's pure coincidence that they're involved in abkhazia, and the same in guadalajara. (and by coincidence, i mean the plot sort of demands it.)
guadalajara is where things really start to go downhill, and for obvious reasons. (another side note, the fact that he had blade wolf reconstructed and freed from his restraints? seems pretty kind, don't you think? he definitely didn't need to, but he did anyway. he knows what it's like to want to be free.)
meeting george is where things get bad for him, and also where his sense of morality and care for others starts showing through. he immediately runs in to save george without checking the area at all, which results in combat with way tougher UGs than a couple of dwarf gekkos. when he talks to george afterwards, his demeanor completely changes--he starts using different speech patterns, his voice is softer, and he's genuinely concerned for george's wellbeing. he only gets intense again when he hears about the lab, after which he immediately heads for it as quickly as possible.
(the pure horror on his face when he sees the room with all the brains will live with me forever, i think.)
when he sees the kids in danger, he actually briefly panics. this isn't something we see from him very often at this point--he didn't even panic after getting completely mutilated during his fight with sam. and then when that scientist shows up with george, he's torn, up until george specifically says to kill the scientist and not worry about him. even then, raiden asks if he's absolutely sure before he makes a move.
we find out after the fact that he wasn't even thinking clearly during that scene; he was so furious that he couldn't think about anything except how much he wanted the scientist dead, according to him. except that isn't really true. he was clearly thinking about more than that, or he wouldn't have asked george if he was certain. and after killing the scientist, he immediately rushes to save george, and succeeds not only in doing so but in retrieving the other half of his body as well. despite painting himself as slipping back into his 'ripper' tendencies, he shows clear remorse for the outcome, even as george is absolutely delighted with it.
raiden then quits maverick so that they don't get dragged into his next actions, because this is where he starts actively breaking the law ('just because it's legal doesn't mean it's right'--moral compass as steady as ever!) and they don't need to be involved in it. even now he still hasn't 'snapped'. despite the denver police being horribly corrupt and working for desperado, he struggles with the idea of killing them after sam starts messing with his mind. they're literally trying to kill him, and he can barely bring himself to fight back. the amount of decency he shows to people who don't deserve it in the slightest is amazing. (it's also dead wrong and totally misguided, but i'm still impressed.)
and then we get to the part where i suppose you could say he 'snaps'. sam and monsoon push him to the breaking point (like idiots) and he gives up on himself. he slips back into the persona solidus created for him, and slaughters monsoon's lackeys along with the man himself.
this is the point where i want to bring back what i said earlier about contrast. as a child, he was trained to kill indiscriminately. no concern, no moral compass, just killing whoever he was told to kill. i've said it before, and i'll say it again--this is a villain origin story. after the amount of horror he's gone through in his life, his fight with monsoon is where you would expect him to really, truly snap and become the person solidus brainwashed him into being.
but he doesn't.
he takes great delight in killing monsoon, that's true. but despite the horror he feels at his own actions, he's completely wrong. he hasn't truly become the 'jack the ripper' that solidus created. on the surface, yes--but look deeper. look at the way he says 'no' right before it all happens. look at the way he specifically says 'i don't want this for anyone else' after the fight. look at how he still focuses on his original goal, he doesn't lose sight of it. he's not in this for the sake of killing. he's in this for the sake of protecting the weak, the innocent children that no one else will. throughout the entire game, he never loses sight of his ultimate goal: to protect the weak, and uphold the ideal of justice. all he does is accept that there is still a part of him that enjoys fighting and killing, and then channels that for good. he lets himself be furious at the monsters who are doing these awful things. he hasn't 'snapped' at all. he's just finally letting himself feel the things he's been repressing for so many years. he doesn't kill indiscriminately. he kills those who are preying on the weak.
despite the title, the game is less about revenge than you might think. it's about protection. ultimately, the things raiden does in this game are to prevent atrocities and save the people who can't save themselves. and if he gets a little enjoyment out of it, hey. that doesn't change the fact that he's still the undeniable hero of the story. he's still a decent, moral, kind person. he's just stopped extending that to monsters. and good for him, i say.
also, i have to bring up sunny while i'm talking about revengeance. i can't put into words how amazing the scene with her is, but the sheer amount of genuine affection between her and raiden is incredible.
and as a final note of evidence, remember her last available codec call? even in the midst of being beaten to hell and back, raiden shows compassion for so many people, and very specifically reassures her, trying to make her feel better and keep her from worrying about him. 'come on. let me see a smile.'
#ask#anon#i could write a lot more on this probably but it's 2 am and i think i got the major points down. god i love raiden#snake who. raiden is the hero of metal gear solid
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honestly THANK YOU for saying all that abt baghra bc i thought i was going crazy from not liking her??? bc i haven't read the books and only summaries of them on wiki and like. i dunno why ppl like her actually even in the show bc this guy, her son, is like "i wanna make the world better for us grisha" and she's just like "no." even tho he sees that she's MAKING HERSELF SICK from suppressing her powers! she's literally like in bed coughing in the flashback yet seem much healthier at the little palace. also like after everything, after her disapproval, after the fold, after centuries of waiting for the sun summoner.. he never abandons her. he makes sure she's cares for. he doesn't harm her. and i have to wonder if baghra has ever thanks him for that, for just not leaving her alone. like i dunno how im suppose ro believe aleks is a heartless villain when he still cares for his abusive mom like this. like has baghra even told her she loved him (honestly she reminds me of a classic emotionally unavailable asian parent but maybe that's just me). also im wondering if baghra ever told aleks that he had an aunt.. bc like.. now that u bring up her isolating him it's like hmmmm...
not at me being like alina... why do u trust the bitter old woman who literally beats u with a stick and verbally abuses u every chance she gets.. just bc she showed a bad painting... like.. pls use two braincells to see that who u figured out as his mother... is also using his protection..
like baghra could've upped and left with alina. but no. she stayed bc she knew she was safe under aleks's protection.
alsoim just impressed that after his first friend tried to drown him and harvest his bones... he didn't go into hiding???? he still wanted to make a safe heaven for grisha!!! HE STILL WANTED TO PROTECT GRISHA EVEN AFTER HIS GRISHA FRIEND TRIED TO KILL HIM FOR HIS FUCKEN BONES. like... this is the guy im suppose to believe is the villain???
honestly i feel like part of the reason why LB's plotlines seem so bad and disconnected (and sometimes outright racist but that's another rant) and why darkles is disproportionately more violent and villainous in the later books is bc she didn't expect the darkling to be so popular and wanted to stick with her guns of making him the villain. but also wanted the money from aleks's popularity. but like you can't have ur cake and eat it too.
Well thank you for sending this ask! It's very sweet and very passionate. I'm glad you liked my post! I didn't put as much thought into it as some of my others lol. I kind of just talked. But it was nice to be able to finally talk about some of the problems I have with both her character and the fandom/author's perception of her.
HERE is the post this is referring to, in case anyone's wondering.
👀👀 You've hit the nail on the head for so many things, here!
Baghra is extremely emotionally unavailable, basically to the point of neglect. She's also verbally and physically abusive, traits which I doubt were only reserved for her students and not her son. Baghra claims she would do anything to protect him, but I've known a lot of parents who have that mindset and yet still harm their children because they think it's "good for them".
Aleksander stays at Baghra's side for years, and even when they're opposing each other she's never too far away from him. Idk if you've read the books but he does eventually hurt her. And as much as I don't like Baghra, I think his actions were horrid. But I'm also honestly kind of surprised it took him so long lmao.
Yeah I mean, in terms of isolation, let's not forget that she never wanted to introduce him to his father, either. Baghra's sense of eternity clouds a lot of her judgments on relationships, which means she views most people as dust and therefore teaches her son to as well. The problem with that is that he's a growing child, and he needs those social and emotional attachments for healthy development.
I would bet quite a bit of money that Baghra has either never told him she loves him or she has told him so few times it's practically forgettable.
And everything becomes more complicated because so many of Baghra's actions are understandable because of her life and her history, but the impacts they have on the people around her, especially Aleksander, are permanently damaging. And the fact that that's never gone over in critical depth in the books or how it's glossed over in fandom is just very disconcerting. Like, acknowledging Baghra's failings doesn't mean we're excusing Aleksander's actions, it just means we're holding Baghra liable for her own. Which the fandom should be doing, considering she's the epitome of an abusive parental figure.
And Alina trusting Baghra over Aleksander is even more confusing! Especially in the show!! This is the woman who beat her and abused her and tortured her friends when they tiny little children (and who probably still does so now that they're adults). This is the woman who mocks you and harasses you and insults you on a regular basis. Why does Baghra revealing she's Aleksander's mother make Alina change her mind?! Like fuck, I'd just feel bad for Aleksander. No wonder he kept it a secret, I would too! And that painting is enough evidence?! Really?! A random painting shown to you by this abusive mentor that's been making your life hell. That's what you're going to betray your new lover over?
The friends trying to harvest his bones thing is a good point, too. I think Aleksander, especially show Aleksander, is incredibly idealistic. I think he cares too much for others - those he's deemed worth his care (a sentiment given to him by Baghra). Despite everything she's tried to teach him about hiding and abandoning others and never caring and never doing anything to help or reach out or connect with people, Aleksander still continues to do so. It's likely because he never got it from Baghra growing up, and so is desperate for those emotional needs to be fulfilled elsewhere.
His turning point, when Baghra tells him it was understandable that those kids tried to kill him because the world is such a hard place for them - that's crucial. And the reason it's possible as a motivating factor is because of that idealism and that desire to help and that desire to be everything his mother isn't. Baghra tells him this trauma he just experienced was because of the oppression of his people, and instead of following her lead and accepting that, going into hiding and abandoning everybody to their misery, he goes I can do something about that. I can make it so this never happens again. Which is usually how trauma like that combines with one's core personality traits at a young age, especially when there's none of the essential support systems in place to aid in recovery (ie, the role Baghra should have been filling but wasn't, because she decided to exacerbate the problem instead).
And yeah, one of my biggest problems with the ham-fisted "beating you over the head with a sledgehammer of evil deeds" look-how-bad-this-character-is! portrayal of the Darkling in the later books comes from the impression I get that Bardugo doesn't trust her readers. She's so desperate to have us hate this character and think him an irredeemable villain, not trusting any of her readers to engage critically with a morally gray character, that it feels quite a bit like condescending fucking bullshit. Which ew, I know how to engage with literature, thanks.
She really does seem to look down on a large part of her fandom, and imo, the infantilization of the female characters in her books seems to carry over to her impression of most of her female readers as well. Which is why the Darkling's character arc gets fucking destroyed. But he's still a good cash grab, of course, so she'll shake his dead corpse in front of the fandom for money every time she wants something from it.
Also! Another reason I think her plotlines feel disconnected (I'm sorry Bardugo I respect you as a person, but shit-) is because the writing in SaB is just bad. I mean, nevermind the absolutely nauseating implications of the way she portrays the Grisha as a persecuted group who's situation is never actually fully addressed as it should be, considering Grisha rights is what her main villain is fighting for (imo for a series called the Grishaverse, LB seems to be pretty anti Grisha), but her characters and story alone are just wrong for each other. They don't fit together.
And the ending is one of the main pieces of evidence in that regard! You can’t say the ending where Alina isn’t Grisha anymore is her “going back to where she started” when she’s always been Grisha. She just didn’t know she was Grisha because she denied that part of herself that she was born with.
Alina is reluctant to move forward or change, she struggles with adapting, and she’s very set on the things she’s grown attached to throughout her life. She also has some latent prejudices against the Grisha, and so denies the possibility of being Grisha for those reasons as well.
Alina’s lack of powers in the beginning of her life because she willfully doesn’t learn about them to avoid change versus her lack of powers at the end of the book when she’s accepted them and then they’re stripped away from her by outer forces are two entirely separate circumstances. You can’t make a parallel about lost powers and lack of Grisha status bringing her back to the start when she was always Grisha and she always had powers and she simply refused to come to terms with it because of personal reasons.
The first situation is an internal conflict that indicates a story about growth and a journey of self acceptance. Denying herself the opportunity to learn about her heritage and to find acceptance with a group of people like her because she’s tied to the past and because of the way she was raised is the setup for a narrative that tackles unlearning prejudice and learning how to connect with a part of her identity that was denied her and learning how to grow independent and self assured. It’s the setup for a different story entirely. The second situation is an external conflict that centers around the ‘corrupting influence of power’... for some reason.
In a world where Grisha do not have social, political, or economic power and they are hunted, centering your heroine’s journey of self acceptance and growth around an external conflict about... the corrupting influence of power (in a group of people that don’t actually have any power?!) just doesn’t work. It is literally impossible to connect the two stories Bardugo is trying to push in Shadow and Bone without seriously damaging the main character’s developmental arc.
The only way a narrative like this would work, claiming that she has gone back to where she started, is either a) if the Grisha weren’t actually a persecuted group and instead were apart of the upper class, or b) if the one bad connection between the two instances is acknowledged - that Alina denied a part of herself crucial to self acceptance and growing up, and that losing her powers at the end has also denied her. It is a tragedy, not a happy ending.
Alina suffered because she didn’t use her powers. She grew sick. It was bad for her. This was not a resistance to 'the corruption of power and the burden of greed', it was her suffering because she couldn’t fully accept herself.
Framing the ending as a return to the beginning can’t be done if you don’t address how bad the beginning was for your main character. You brought her back to a bad point in her life. You regressed her. This should be a low point in her arc. It should be a problem that’s solved so she can finish developing organically or it should be something that is acknowledged as a tragedy in it’s own right, for the future the world (the writing) denied her.
This is a ramble and it makes no sense and I’m really sorry, but my point is that Bardugo put the wrong characters in the wrong story. The character arc required for organic development doesn’t match the story and intended message at all. The narrative doesn’t fit the cast. She's got two clashing stories attempting to work in tandem and she ends up with both conflicting messages that fans still can’t comprehend in her writing and an ending that doesn’t suit her main character to such an impossible degree that it’s almost laughable.
So yeah, there's a few reasons why I think the story and the plot feels so bad and disconnected. I hope you don't mind me making this answer so long! 😅 I was not expecting to write this much.
#shadow and bone#sab#grishaverse#alina starkov#aleksander morozova#mymetas#the darkling#baghra critical#anti leigh bardugo#sorry!#sab salt#sab meta#fandomcourse#negative#negativity#myramblings#asks and answers#joonmono#anti baghra#leigh bardugo critical#abuse tw#torture tw
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LEONA STORY THOUGHTS PLEASE I am curious what you think abt his arc...I personally saw it as lacking
OK IM GLAD OTHER PEOPLE THINK THAT TOO
I love Leona as a character, he and Jade were my favourites going in and still are, but holy shit they did him such a big disservice come the end of his book.
he’s genuinely amongst my favourite characters almost exclusively for his nuance and story (his looks are a very big plus wwww)
ok so i rambled a lot and basically summarized book 2 without me realizing so
1. spoilers
2. IM SORRY I MADE THIS SO LONG
They handed us such a good build-up, they show off how cunning Leona is- he’s ruthless but in the sense that he has a goal in mind and can SEE that goal and how to get there. Hell they also show us that all of Savanaclaw (bar Jack) considers him a great leader and is willing to follow him into this scheme, even though Savanaclaw had seemed, up until that point, all about physical strength. Our initial impressions of Leona are that he’s arrogant, fairly aggressive (our first interaction was almost quite a violent one), and lazy. With the slow unveiling of his ploy to take out Diasmonia, we get the sense that theres a lot more to this catman than it seems: he’s smart and cunning.
When it gets to the actual confrontation, with the reveal that Savanaclaw’s plan was dismantled without them knowing and the ensuing fight, only for us to win, its such a good and incredibly tense moment!! We know he’s going to overblot at this point, and by god are we tense and ready to see him snap, then he suddenly says he doesn’t care.
To the rest of his dorm, that was betrayal- and we can tell it stung. We know he was just as invested in this plan as the rest of his boys, yet he starts going on how he doesn’t care. How this doesn’t and could never matter in the grand scheme of things (which grants us the first of few insights into his inner feelings). He snaps, insulting Ruggie, but also insulting himself, both as people who can never turn around their lineage. What was handed to him is all they will ever be, and in Leona’s case, he could never hope to be king. Everything he does will only ever be looked down upon, drowned in the looming shadow of his older brother.
From there we know that the overblots about to happen, he’s turning into sand, he’s loosing grip on himself and his magic. I’d love to talk about Ruggie’s whole role in this and his feelings because they really did gloss over that Leona almost killed him, that he was severely hurt by someone he put his faith in. That’s gotta leave some trauma afterwards, but I’ll save it for another time.
Right before his overblot we get this line from Lilia, “Would that the lion king of the savanna could witness this absolute farce. No, if you ask me, the collar suits you far better than a crown ever could.”
He goes on to compare him to Malleus- ouch- and that tips Leona over the edge, being directly told that not only can he never take the crown, that he doesn’t even deserve it.
How ironic that Savanaclaw revered him as a strong and cunning leader, a GOOD leader.
(This has turned out really long and theres probably no need to continue on, I think I’ve made my point in how good of a build-up they handed us with Leona’s story, essentially just that they give us a really good explanation of a backstory, it’s not enough to make us sympathize and forgive him, but it sure informs us of why he’s like this and his view on life.)
Ok, come after Leona’s overblot, he just kinda, gets up.
Like,,, were not handed anything- Leona just kinda brushes it off (I personally hate how little they focus on how exhausted and disorientated these boy’s should’ve been after an overblot, especially after were told that it can kill them).
Just in general, they didn’t give Leona a resolution to any of this, and they honestly did that with Azul as well. With Riddle at least, he tries to change- his overblot has a notable affect on Riddle as a character, that he’s learning that his life doesn’t have to be a set of rules. Leona makes no such character development and boy do the people around him let him off easy for this as well. You’d think Ruggie would feel more strongly about this after he was almost turned to sand.
Overall I feel a lot of frustration with how little they let him (and Azul) develop as characters afterwards, it feels like the book just falls flat on its face after we defeat Leona’s blot monster.
God I’m sorry this was so long but I hope everything got across ok-
Yeah they didn’t go places with his arc and I hate it because he has so much to work with and they gave him the chance to start to work through it but just completely let it pass.
I honestly also have some gripes on how this fandom seems to characterize him a lot, I can’t quite put a finger on how it bothers me (tho i see quite a lot of people focusing on how he’s just handsome but lazy and none of his more serious problems, i.e. an inferiority complex), but theres actually a really good fic (its a Leona x Malleus one LMAO) that has my favourite characterization of him to date.
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Can I ask what your season 1 Lok reboot looks like?
this is about 3k words i checked lmfao dont say i didnt warn u
a key part of the whole thing is that korra gets way more perspectives and more experiences representative of like, normal people in republic city bc i think something that really defined what a good avatar aang was was how many people he met and got to know and how he didnt exclusively or even mostly associate w cops and bureaucrats and leaders. so mako and bolin. well first of all their backstories are a little more fleshed out and we get a less black and white view of the “triads” (lol) and mako and bolin’s experiences w them. cuz the show very much does the whole thing of like Criminals Bad but dont worry even tho mako and bolin did commit crimes theyre not Criminals!! so just a little more nuance on the alleged gang problem and the poverty in the city
korra does start out very naive w very black and white ideas (ex. “you guys are CRIMINALS?”) i think a really good way of developing her away from her sheltered naive worldview is putting her in whats clearly an incredibly complicated city w an absolute cesspool of political conflicts, ethnic tensions, the lasting effects of colonization, etc and having her try and understand the needs of “the people” in a more complicated way than “i have to save the good guys from the bad guys” ykwim? and i think the absolute WORST way to do that is what they did. bc we get mako and bolin who could contribute genuinely compelling thematic elements to the story: one parent who was indigenous and one who was from a colonizer background in the decades directly following the end of the war, kids who grew up in poverty apparently without any familial support, and who now are trying to be “respectable” members of society (especially mako). and then most of that is pretty much tossed aside bc asami swoops in w her capitalist dad and her piles of money and the class issue is just never talked about again.
so the way i’d fix all that is like. introducing more, like, normal people. some nonbenders, more workers, more immigrants, etc, to show what daily life is actually like for people. because. we dont know! we dont have any context about whether the nonbender oppression thing is actually an issue bc we dont KNOW any nonbenders with normal lives! and spoiler: the nonbender oppression thing is not an issue. bc it doesnt make historical sense. lok is set 7 decades after the end of the war. that is not by ANY stretch of the imagination long enough to heal from the scars of imperialism, ESPECIALLY not when lok is also set in a settler colonial state. like that fact should have featured PROMINENTLY in the political and social setting! realistically, nonbenders arent an oppressed class, earth and water nation people are, regardless of bending status! as in all settler colonial states, the colonizers and their descendants (in this case fire nation people) retain most of the financial and political capital, leaving the colonized and racialized immigrants (in this case earth kingdom and water tribe people respectively) generally impoverished and politically suppressed. like aside from the fact that theres no way toph would have become a cop, it’s so ridiculous to think that an established privileged class of fire nation colonizers would EVER accept being policed by earthbenders!
imagine how much more nuanced and interesting it would be to set republic city as a remnant of a colonial past still fraught w the violence and tension that colonialism and the associated ideology imposed?? instead of some vague ideas of criminal who wear 1920s outfits and harass shopkeepers think about why extralegal and violent groups like that might form! earth kingdom people trying to push for the reclamation of their land? ethnic groups protecting themselves against corrupt cops? ESPECIALLY w the history that the fire nation has of SPECIFICALLY jailing and killing earthbenders and waterbenders BECAUSE of the potential they have to resist against fire nation imperialism like it just makes no sense at all that earthbenders would be privileged on land that, 70 years ago, they would have been imprisoned on! like these various paramilitary groups falling along these different ideological or ethnic lines, fire nation or earth kingdom or water tribe, pro colonization or anti colonization, pro cop or anti cop, pro immigrant or anti immigrant, and then you juxtapose that w depictions of a govt thats failing to keep this all under control w tenzin trying desperately to keep it together despite the fact that it’s becoming increasingly obvious that the state has no interest in taking the conflicts seriously and would rather just point vague fingers at criminals and gangs? and THEN you bring in korra, who has no idea about any of this and thinks that all its gonna take is kicking some ass every couple days, meeting normal people who offer all kinds of different opinions abt the efficacy of the state and the different violent or nonviolent groups and ideologies clashing in the city and the way all this shit is affecting people’s lives and livelihoods and relationships w other citizens??
theres so much good shit there so many incredible things u could do w that like Where do we go after colonial atrocities? is it possible for a settler colonial state to take revolutionary or indigenous ideas seriously? is liberal reform enough in a state like this? and then all the growth that korra could do going from a simple black and white life about mastering the elements to this messy complicated sociopolitical knot of a city? and all the different kinds of characters u could introduce in this city? like why would u EVER think that the most interesting characters that this story has to offer is a police chief a congressman and a billionaire????
but anyways. that’s what the Setting of my idealized version of lok is. as for the actual plot, it is as follows
it starts out similarly as the show. republic city is MUCH more fraught w political tension and violence and korra knows this but assumes that it’s just a matter of throwing a few gang leaders and corrupt officials in jail. tenzin manages to come see them in the south pole and intends give korra real lessons while he’s there but they receive news of a terrorist attack in republic city only a few days after he gets there so his family has to pack up and leave again.
korra stows away to republic city (katara catches her leaving and gives her blessing im a SUCKER for that moment). she does have a hard time adjusting but she doesn’t do what she did in the show lol the first person she meets in the city is this older woman who works on the docks, directs her to a place where she can eat and gives her a roof to sleep under for the first night. so korra’s first exposure to republic city is just about forming connections w ordinary people like ship workers and a family owned restaurant and people practicing their bending in the park. and by the time she reaches air temple island a day or so later her head is spinning w all this new information and the way that nothing is really what she expected it to be. tenzin gives her his own perspective on everything and pema gives her her own perspective on everything and even those two seem wildly different from all the people she’s already met. and so korra starts to get a kind of outline of the conflicts plaguing the city as extremely complex and a lot more influenced by older ideas of fire nation imperialism and earth kingdom land reclamation than she had any idea about.
mako and bolin are still pro benders but not like. super famous like they are in the show. korra’s picked up a couple friends by now and one of them takes her to a gym where a lot of amateur pro bending (is that an oxymoron? lol) matches happen and thats how she meets mako and bolin and joins their pro bending team. Unfortunately for korra, this gym is run by lin beifong, and also has the distinction of being one of the most notoriously anti settler state organizations in the country. lin beifong is NOT a cop but she runs this gym (and the pro bending league) as a way to offer support to local earth kingdom/water tribe youth, teach self defense skills, a center of community organizing, and sometimes to act as a front to hide revolutionary/combat organizing against the pro fire nation paramilitaries/police force. tenzin is DISTRAUGHT that korra does this and this is where the friction btwn them comes from bc (from tenzin’s perspective) she does things like this without thinking or even fully understanding the context behind them and tenzin will have to deal w the political fallout of the avatar openly aligning herself w a very divisive figure in the community and (from korra’s perspective) tenzin is too unwilling to take sides in a conflict that’s claiming lives and when the state is clearly not taking sufficient steps to protect people well then why the hell shouldnt she align herself w lin beifong, who IS taking steps to protect and support people?
as korra more fully integrates herself into the city and learns more abt how different people think abt everything going on this is where the real exposition abt the equalists begins. they’re a paramilitary group w an ideology thats gaining increasing support among middle/upper class fire nation people, esp nonbenders. on the face theyre abt putting checks on “bender oppression” but really it’s an excuse to persecute and surveil earthbenders waterbenders and airbenders, bc fire nation people have all this leftover fear about benders who arent fire nation Rising Up Against them and these people who r using their Savage Excuse for Bending to terrorize good innocent (fire nation) people. theres all too frequent terrorist attacks that the equalists claim credit for mostly against monuments to earth/water/air nation people and earth/water nation community centers (one like it was the event that forced tenzin back to republic city) but also like the govt doesnt take a lot of these seriously or if they do only a couple people are charged without doing damage to the entire organization
this is also around the time that they meet asami and she becomes part of their friend group. asami likes pro bending but her dad HATES it so she sneaks out to watch matches at lin beifong’s gym (korra says ironically like don’t u know how ~divisive~ that is and asami answers that the only reason its Not divisive is that gyms like beifongs are the only place where nobody recognizes her). and asami alongside korra is also kind of developing a more nuanced perspective on the city that she lives in cuz obviously the only worldview she’s ever been exposed to is her father’s right? and she keeps pushing it off making excuses not to bring mako and bolin and korra around to her house or even not to be seen w them in certain neighborhoods until they call her on it and she’s like Well honestly my dad might do something awful to u! and i dont wanna risk it!
and as time goes on we see more abt asami’s home life like her father’s hyper conservative politics and asami keeps these secrets abt her hobbies and her friends from him but she’s still clearly under his influence and mako bolin and korra r getting increasingly worried abt it cuz like...asami seems to tend to make excuses for him so that she wont have to be drawn into conflict and originally they think its just her being privileged and thats def part of it but the more they find out abt it the more they realize what a tight fucking grip he has on her and the way that like. asami sneaking out once or twice a week is the Only thing she does for herself. and it really starts freaking them out how influential this billionaire is and all the information theyre getting from asami abt what a piece of shit he clearly is. and so that whole plot thing comes about and shows us how deeply embedded these “equalist” ideas are in conservative republic city politics and how much influence theyre actually having in policy making and law enforcement.
asami suffers in the aftermath of this like being forced to truly confront the harm her father is doing both to the city and to herself. and she ends up leaving home when this discovery really breaks. but bc of the deep corruption in govt and police sato isn’t really....dealt with? like this big story breaks and everyones like Oh, My God! Hiroshi Sato Is Funding An Illegal Paramilitary Group! and theres all kinds of inane political discourse about it and he’s arrested but he bails himself out immediately and his finances are examined but he maintains control over them and after a few weeks the gang (bc they Have become close among all this w much less interpersonal drama lol) has to admit that this news story hasnt done what they thought it was going to it hasn’t dealt the equalists a real hit its just given them a very high profile ally
and this is when things really start to ramp up in terms of action like up until now korra’s daily activities are mostly like hanging around in the city w her friends (which in part entails doing little avatar stuff that people dont feel comfortable going to police with, like Can you help me my ex husband wont pay child support or Please help i got robbed and i really needed that money for rent next month or Help my son keeps skipping school can you talk to him cuz im worried abt him being safe and doing well in school) and pro bending and airbending lessons (which i know ive neglected this part of the story in terms of her whole spiritual/physical conflict but it’s more of a subtle thing like it’s one of tenzin and korra’s more frequent arguments like tenzin says she needs to focus on spirituality and korra asks why she even needs to bc republic city is a sociopolitical problem not a spiritual one) but now the equalist threat seems to really be looming on every level of society like the storyline of equalists preventing pro bending matches happens here and everyones just at a total loss of what to do next. plus increasing and scary rhetoric about tenzin and his family that destroying the last airbenders is necessary to preserving the integrity of the united republic
and so theres the equalist takeover of the city. the people who are mostly resisting this are lin and ragtag group of people who have been resisting colonial rule for a long time (including suyin, who is part of a communist anti colonial community outside the city, because i said so and i think it would be fun), people who have been visiting her gym for years, members of her amateur pro bending league, plus asami and korra and tenzin. korra and tenzin have a sweet moment (bc they do genuinely care abt each other a lot even if their relationship has been marked w a lot of tension and arguing) where tenzin says like you know i think that ive lost focus on the kind of spirituality that might actually help you. korra says what do you mean? and tenzin kind of gestures to where theyre sitting with people buzzing around organizing to take care of innocents and civilians and to fight the equalists and he says this is a kind of spiritual too, isnt it?
and something something plot plot blah blah i havent decided on the details of the plot climax yet but that’s the climax of korra’s character development and what helps her connect w her spiritual side in order to protect the city: the realization that community is its own kind of spirituality. and it kind of represents the real development that i want her to have going from somebody who thinks that the world is divided into criminals and victims and she has to save the victims Into the kind of avatar who understands the people that she’s bound to serve. she becomes an avatar of the people!
and then happy ending lol korra and asami get together lin and tenzin reconcile after years of being at odds the show ends on a hopeful note that the inhabitants of republic city and the united republic as a whole Can move on from the scars of colonialism by reckoning w the remnants of fire nation colonial ideology and reparations to the earth kingdom people whose land this is and destruction of colonial systems that have maintained and enforced colonial violence all these years
#the ending of this isnt as detailed as the beginning and middle bc ive drafted the first couple chapters but i havent thought out the#logistics and details of the climax lol#asks#lok
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watched all of the untamed / cql in two weeks after my friend 1 told me abt mdzs a hundred years ago and my friends 2 and 3 tried to get me into cql for like two whole years and there are.
feelings.
very first scene is a very dramatic death in the middle of nightmare battle on sith planet land . i will forget abt it in the next tenish episodes and then will be very surprised when it becomes Extremely Painful
anyway magic flying gays and possession and human sacrifice! we are off to a great start
in retrospect, chaos goblin wei wuxian must have had a blast pretending to be so cRaZy and be as disruptive as he could as mo xuanyu lbr
listen. why is fire always evil coded. cant a magic clan wear red, black and orange and have flame motif while being wholesome?
For Legal Reasons These Are Not Zombies
i wish the politics of the sect were a bit clearer, especially at the beggining when the wen clan had sm power, was wen ruohan the chief cultivator? is that why they were so slow in responding to the attacks? im v confused by the pre yiling patriarch politics
fighting in the roof by the moonlight as way of flirtiiiiiiing. as i understand this is a wuxia/xianxia trope and honestly...... thank u for ur service
slight bullying and being a nuisance in general, as a way of flirting we love to see it
wwx: if i drink on the rooftop, thats not inside the cloud recesses! hmmm check and mate :D lwj: i will fuck u up so help me god wwx: :0
i lov them
through hell or high water (quite literally) wei wuxian rem ains a trashfire gremlin till the end and i love him with my whole heart
in the pt subs wei wuxian calls jiang cheng a stubborn duck and i dearly wish that had come back
my opinions on almost every character goes from love to hate u - Hmm Me Like U - BABY. ILY. and i am Very Pleased w that. its been a while since i loved such a complete cast so much i think
no really. i WONT go into a detailed rant abt what i love about each of these characters and each of their relationships to each other. but i COULD.
some lan disciples in the loudest whisper ever: YEAH THATS THE JIN BASTARD MENG YAO HEARD THE GOT SUPER HUMILIATED BY HIS DAD LOL SURE HOPE HE DOESNT TAKE SLIGHTS TO HIS CHARACTER TO HEART
lan xichen, immediately: i must Love him
being into problematic ppl is in the Lan genetics, we come to realize
wen qing deserves so many awards for so many things but not snapping and just stabbing wen chao is at the top
that scene at lan qirens class where wwx talks about using resentful energy to fight a violent spirit. exquisite.
It establishes Good Student lan wangji, wei wuxian as curious and questioning and not afraid of taboo, lwj sees that wwx is not, in fact, a dumb ass hes just a Dumbass, shows us the audience (esp. a western audience) how shocking the idea of disrupting the dead/dying and controlling resentful energy actually is, the theoretical foreshadow arguing, everyone else like ‘shUT UP’, “and how could you ensure that the resentful energy would obey you and not hurt other?” “well i havent thought that far” and of course, lan qiren just straight up lobbing a hard object at wwx head,. chefs kiss
fellas is it gay to bother the hot rule obessessed nerd from ur school and make drawings of him with flowers in his hair and then hide gay porn in his book to antagonize him and ask him to hold ur hand and be ur friend and talk to him all the time and get him drunk and give him bunnies bc you know he likes them and give him a lantern and always want his attention and dedicate yourself to getting him to smile-
and after all of that wwx rly said oh i Admire him, aksd like yeah we all were there in high school buddy
i have Learned. caves = gay.
accidental marriage +beint physically tied together with the sacred married ribbon+ gay panic+foreshadowing+bunnies! in the cave (1)
the story abt lan yi and baoshan sanren tho. i would like to see it
early days wen bros pull my heart strings like a guqin
EVERYTHING about the lantern scene; disaster hets jiang yanli and jin zixuan; how wwx made lwj a bunny lantern. how soft and touched lwj was. wwx gleefully pointing out he was smiling and lwj IMMEDIATELY PULLING HIW SWORD ON HIM LMAO. tragically foreshadowy promises to do right by pepople, living without regrets. lwjs 'oh no do i love him??' face. just. all of it.
i have it on good acc that in the novel lwj is explicitly Repressed Gay Panicked Big Horny which is delightful and rly Adds to the performance
baby lwj is really just conceal dont feel dont let them know u have EMOTIONS (derogatory)
jiang cheng rly went "why dont.u go play with HIM if u like him so much"
jc and wwx have big BIG annoying sibling energy dont think too hard abt it or youll cry
lotus pier is soo pretty :((((((((((((((((
up until episode 13 you could think this could be a magical ancient chinese gays pride n prejudice w swords and shenanigans ................youre just not prepared for the game of thrones of it all
seriously ha ha ha i cried so much w this show my eyes genuinely swelled up . like. physically. fun timez fun timez
that being said, its hilarious that wen xu goes to cloud recesses like 'come out or ill kill all these hostages' and then DOESNT WAIT FOR AN ASWER AND KILLS THEM ALL IMMEDIATELY. do u know how blackmail works sir
would like to make it recorded that from day one i was like 'CALL A GODDAMN CULTIVATION G20 THIS ASSHOLE SECT IS LITERALLY MASSACRING YALL!!' and it took them like 3 or 4 massacres to do anything and they STILL sent their heirs into their territory LIKE
when wwx cites the gusu lan rules to wen chao tho. that rebel/attention whore/cutie pie 'look lan zhan i DID memorize the rules after all' ‘also a big fuck you to the wen sect :D :D’ sweet spot that scene achieves . delicious
all the cultivator young masters being petty af even though they are practically prisoners at the cave is hilarious and i love them
hurt and comfort + gay mistunderstandings + watsonian gay declaration music + accidental evil acquisition! at the cave (2)
its like where do i start? the fact theyre both trapped and kind of heavily injured inside an isolated cave with a murder turtle? wwx gay panicking lwj into coughing up bad blood? lwj being jealous as wwx babbles abt mianmian? telling him he shouldnt play with people and wwx saying he never played him? wwx going Oh. I See what is happening. YOU like mianmian, and lwj absolute done face ??? (iconic) wwx touching the sacred married ribbon Again? the telepathic communication? the sword? WEI WUXIAN ASKING LAN WANGJI TO SING TO HIM AS HE IS PASSING OUT AND LWJ SINGING HIM. THE SONG. HE WROTE. FOR WWX. AND THAT HE CALLED. THEIR SHIP NAME????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
they are SO insufferable pleeeeease
in the words of my friend 1 : “CQL is so gay we were all amazed how it got past the censors Ofc unfortunately it can't be novel level gay But they did their best And we love them for it”
in the theme of songs THIS OST. WUJI HAS BEEN LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE SINCE I FIRST HEARD IT the whole ost is so so sO beautiful.
the costuming in this is also soooo exquisite. the embroidery? the fabrics? the details? how every sect and clan has a distinct style and architecture? (also ik they based each off of dif periods in chinese history which is REALLY fucking cool) just chefs kiss
the direction too!. i enjoy the unusual camera movements and i think they give it that Vibe, also their composition is PARTICULARLY good when it comes to telling the subtext through position of camera/position of character (like nhs off to the side in scenes he at first glance doesnt need to be/ how lwj is often centered when hes Jealous Yearning at wwx being affectionate w other ppl, wwx return from burial mounds etc)
ik madam yu is like Badass Milf Check and shes not getting any mom of the year awards but im delighted at how messy she is. IMAGINE that woman on tiktok
you better have enjoyed gay cave (2) bc its Just Pain from here on out!
jiang fengmian and madame yu win the Most Dramatic Way to show they do care about each other, actually ..... ever :)
i thought jiang yanli jiang cheng and wei wuxian forcing themselves to escape yunmeng barely holding on after their parents are killed was going to be the height of pain in this show. ha.
the family dynamics in general on this showwwww, both blood/ adopted/ found families, brotherly bonds and lifelong friendships just. rly. truly. fucked me up. theyre all so important and complicated and well rounded and beautiful and tragic
and beyond being a Win For the Gays im so glad the relationships w wwx and jiang yanli/ wen qing were NOT changed from platonic bc they are so much better like that imo. like maybe if we didnt Live In A Society it wouldnt be so, but the fact wwx and others can love and value them so much and theres nothing romantic or sexual abt it is like. so refreshing. especially @ jyl, with the way he and jc are overprotective of her and shes such a nurturing/care taker figure for them, it would just not vibe as well if they made it romantic
i love that this is a story abt Wei Wuxian, the Yiling Patriarch aka Actual Satan/Boogey Man/Village With/Public Enemy Number One , my dude is literally a necromancer who only dresses in black and has evil smokey black tendrils wafting out of him, but the really edgy one is still jiang cheng, pastel purple fashion icon
and speaking of best/worst siblings wei wuxian and jiang cheng *immediately starts crying*
The Golden Core Transfer i just. no thots only tears
wen qing and wen ning putting themselves in so much danger just.... to help them. wn saving jc from wen chao. wq finding a way to get wwx to transfer his core. like thinking about the monumental work these two did to help wwx and jyl and jc... jyl trying so fucking hard to be strong and keep on moving and giver her little brothers comfort after losing everything... jiang cheng. losing his parents and his home and his ability to do anything abt it and his complete desperation and lack of self worth and turning on them with agression when he didnt realize all that they did for him ... hhhhhhhhhhhhh
me, pointing at the whole cast “i just LOVE them mom!!!”
its sad tho, that BARELY ANY of the women have like.... actual important conversations let alone relationships with each other at all in the story. and like wq and jyl have stayed at the same place for extended periods of time, where wq actively took care of her TWICE, and still! not one measly convo, nothing! ................ .𝓌ₕᵧ
everyone in this show need a good sip of Self Worth and Stop Sacrificing Yourself juice
ngl the sword flying looks very dumb
“a-cheng, please bring a-xian back.” “i will, i promise.” ;-;
the whole calling each other by the More Intimate Version of the name, first as teasing and later as true intimacy. mmmhmmm yes
untamed where everythings the same but wwx evil flute song is eoeo
related that scene when wwx comes back from the burial mounds for the first time w demonic cultivation and he acts all formal and calls lwj hanguang-jun and keeps being evasive and distant and mean and soooooo................. facetious
and how hes kind of desperately trying to keep intense lwj at bay (A FIRST) and avoiding actually talking to either of them and its all tension ughhh and then he MOCKS his and lwjs relationship, he jokes w him in this like... mean echo of their usual ~banter~ oof
and like!!! uncertain but so relieved jc who just HUGS him w no reservations for once and its not like he isnt just as worried as lwj abt wwx and what hes doing, but he chooses in that moment to enjoy getting him back first and mmhmMMMmMm yes (maybe my favorite scene in the whole show? MAYBE SO. )
highkey hurt me but also. i might be into mean wwx. i will take no criticism.
lan zhans sad eyes tho :(((((((((
on one hand i wish we could have seen what happened at the burial mounds but on the other the timeskip adds so much flair to his return so im hnnn
also i love that hes been missing for 3 months reappears kinda melancholic and bloodthirsty and knowing malign tricks and jc is like 'so. are u sad bc of lan wangji'
when ur bae survived the war but he thinks ur evil/ might be evil so you cant kiss :///
hmmm talking at the rooftop under the moonlight not mentioning everything that stands between usssss
they are the two jades of lan and we’ll be the two heroes of yunmeng is the type of line u dont even need to know whats gonna happen to know thats gonna be sad
when they fight wen ruoshan at the nightless city i thought that was the battle we see at the first ep and its not and its so easy and theyre all like ‘yayy we won go wwx!’ i was just. SCREAMS WHAT is gonna HAPPEN
so like. post burial mounds/sunshot campaign pre yiling patriarch wwx is like. ultra arrogant, ultra mocking, peak lil shit and it gave me e v e r y t h i n g i wanted
even tho having the wen prisoners at the targets at phoenix mountain and still having wwx and jzx shooting the arrows was???? so.... tone deaf
wwx: fucking w demonic energy jyl: he has never done anything wrong in his life, ever <3 <3 (mood)
the parallels between meng yao/wei wuxian (and even xue yang a bit?) are Seen and they are Valid
wwx post burial mounds: can yall SHUT UP abt the goddamn sword (suibian left the chat)
LIKE truly, we talk abt the angst and yearning with wangxian. but what abt wwx and suibian. xianbian / xianqing angst and comfort 100k
take a shot everytime someone coughs up blood
zidian is simply the coolest spiritual weapon rip to suibian and chenqing and bichen and sendou and baixa........ but tis the truth
cons: everyones families died in a nightmare war! everyones homes burned to the ground! everyone is traumatized! pros: everyone gets cooler clothes and weapons!!
wen ning and a-yuan and yanli bestest babes squad dont touch me rn
everyone: brooding and fighting wq and jyl: why dont you try some acupunture/drinking some soup and calm down huh? how abt that bitch??
showing the battle/massacre at the nightless city first was genius actually bc then everytime we have a cute scene w yunmeng bros and theyre like 'we'll be together forever! uwu' youre like oh. oh no. oh no no no.
justice vs lawfulness vs means and ends 👁
jc: stay in the right path and practice the art of the sword wx: yeah thats not gonna happen chief
my reaction to wwx renouncing to the sect politics to help the wens was just that elmo burning gif in succession
the dramatic rain. wen qing desperately calling out to wen ning. the ghosts/puppets killing the guards. how terrifying wn actually was while wwx was controlling him :( lwj goeing after him to try and stop him and then he just; he Sees him and understands him even if he cant actually do anything about it other than let them go.
“there must be somewhere in this earth we can go to :(((((((((”
"IF I HAVE TO FIGHT THEM, I'D RATHER IT BE YOU. DYING BY YOUR HANDS WOULD AT LEAST BE WORTH IT." oh my god oh my god oh my goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddd
also lwjs umbrella is white w black smoke.. . . nice
yiling patriarch / demonic farming burial mounds settlement is like one of my favorite concepts. they an "EVIL" FARMING COMMUNITY LED BY THE VILLAGE WITCH COME ON
they planted TURNIPS and LOTUS FLOWERS and ONE (1) baby and made lanterns and a common hall :(((((((
wen qing and wei wuxian, baddest bitches and genius science best friends i absolutely LOVED to see it. they rly went ‘is anyone gonna sibling/project partner that’ and didnt wait for an answer
both wwx and jyl getting lotus ponds at the burial mounds and in lanling bc they miss lotus pier ;;;;;;;w
;;;;; wish jyl had actually gone into the burial mounds. we were robbed of jyl and wq meeting again and jyl meeting a-yuan and seeing the settlement and the homes and all ;w; at least jc did go, stab wounds and broken arms and all
wwx like... having thrown his whole life away to help the wens (yeah the sect leaders and jin guangshan in particular wanting his stygian tiger amulet was an Element but still) and not.... necessarily regretting it, but grappling with all of the consequences of it... becoming moody and drepressed at times, missing his family and lotus pier and his friends and probably simply missing being around people and causing trouble, extrovert that he is, lashing out at the wens and at a-yuan, just in general the whole messiness of that experience
the way the resentful energy does affect his temperament is rly nice bc its not too in your face,(i mean outside of the Shaky Hands of Rage) but like he clearly has a much lesser control on his anger and impulsivity (tall order) than both before bm and after hes ressurected
on that note A-YUAN BABIEST BABY BOY BEST BOY
lan zhan being like oh hey there wei ying fancy meeting u and our son here. just passing by u know how it is hmmmmMm and then PLOT TWIST having defied orders to go see him and being punished for it. oof;;
they habent seen each other in like? a year? and now theyre tgt 10 seconds and are already parenting a child together
also lwj rly kneels down in the snow way too much to be healthy
wwx: calm down guyssss i wont lose control of demonic cultivation omgggg . spoiler alert: he loses control of demonic cultivation
did u enjoy cute children? good bc now the Real Pain Begins
jiang yanli and jin zixuan rly out there APROPRIATING both disaster gays AND bury ur gays huh ;w;
i KNEW jin lings birthday was gonna fuck something up but the GASP that left my body when wwx lost control of wn and killed jin zixuan .. . .
im sorry and thank you aaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAaAAAAA
when wen ning and wen qing were telling wwx their plan i was saying NO NO NO NO NO NO out loud in despair
also can we talk abt how wq is definetely talking about only the both of them surrending themselves but then? everyone else just surrenders w them? IT MAKES NO SENSE LIKE WHY WOULD THEY what would be the Point
sometimes there are some pretty gaping jumps in logic and continuity that are just like ? ?
wwx: oh so when you try to murder me its justified but when i survive through dark magic and murder all of you its a "war crime"
unsurprisingly, his most feral, most spiraling moment talking to the sect leaders on the roof and attacking them and even fighting lan zhan is among my favorite scenes... its like, so painful to watch but also so thrilling (and maybe my wen bbs dying arose some resentful energy in me what can i say)
and its JUST, all they ever wanted was to do good but then... war. and trauma. and hubris.
jiang cheng on the ground clearly thorn between what to do and feel is a Mood, lets just say
i was already crying when jyl showed up, but if i wasnt-
i suffered SO MUCH through this series trying to figure out WHY jc would kill wwx. and when i understood. its somehow not as bad as i thought and also MUCH MUCH WORSE
a look into my group chat during the last flashback episodes:
SO ANYWAY. after the BLOOD BATH and RIPPING YOUR HEART OUT and FEEDING IT TO YOU the untamed goes ‘ayy back to the present!! tu du dud ud du’
literally it ends a quarter into an episode and then KEEPS GOING i had to pause and stare blankly at the ceiling for an hour
babie cultivators and detective soulmates . i do need some cute after All of That
(not that the pain is over LOL)
lwj is significantly less emotionally repressed in the present and its delightful. hes just ALL IN with wwx. and not just in the ‘i would and have killed various men and risked my reputation for you’ but also ‘ur tired here have a drink i brought it up cause i know u like it and it want you to be happy, always’
“when everyone praised me and wanted my power, you were the only one that challenged me. now that everyone hates me and wants me dead, youre the only one that stands by my side.” hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
and just filling in the blanks how lan zhan searched for him. for all of those 16 years he searched for him and was punished for it and raised a-yuan, the only survivor of the burial mounds settlement, as his own in gusu......
and jiang cheng. being the tough love uncle . having raised the yunmeng jiang clan from the rubble all alone, his whole family dead, some of it on the blame of his own brother, his siblings, his closest friends gone.......and only jin ling there needing his guidance.
THE PARALLEL BETWEEN JIN LING BEING A LIFELINE FOR JIANG CHENG AND A-YUAN FOR LAN WANGJI AFTER THE BATTLE AT THE NIGHTLESS CITY
great now i made myself sad
and like . the fact! that lwj and jc dislike each other!!. jc projects blame onto him for wwx both “leaving” him and indirectly causing their families deaths and when hes so consumed by it he makes wwx an enemy, lwj is there now? trying to protect him?? and lwj, who can never understand the pain that wwx , indirectly or not put jc through, but who was right there when jc tried to kill him and will never allow him to hurt wwx again. and how they like. in a way project blame of their tragedies onto each other while dealing with some type of survivor guilt and in their own way still loving wwx through it all??? amd in way its kind of fundamentally selfish but also tragically understandable? and like when u put it against the fact that after he disappears during the sunshot campaign they were looking for him together and fought together??
JUST. THE CHARACTERS. AND THE RELATIONSHIPS IN THIS. MAN. UGH. GOD.
and like i think thats what makes it so good? its such a sad and painful and violent story, edgy even, but its compelling bc at the center of it there are all of these relationships and different types of love and hope and. :( i love it
enough crying lets talk abt wwx sleeping at the jingshi with lwj and wearing his under garment for a minute 🙏
jin ling just has that Was Raised by JC energy tho lmao i love him
babie cultivator squad is the perfect ammount of cute and comedic relief while still bearing the weight? of the narrative in a way, both from sizhui and jin lings existences, and also. like. how do i put this. they feel hopeful? they were born after a war, they came of age at a time of relative peace, they dont hold on so closely to the resentments of their parents/father figures, they are specifically shown as more accepting and open minded. and its like.... Hope for the future
one of the ?? things i love the most is the fact that the main cast are often in situations where theyre hunted/running but they like. never wear disguises... just going around in their gorgeous expensive clan clothes and hair ornaments and distinctive spiritual weapons.... maybe w a straw hat on, just for kicks
wwx teacher 🥺🥺🥺
so this is why its called Yi City Misery huh
a-qing is such. an icon. im so sad. my girl even knew to leave xys dumb self rotting by the road but no one listens to her thats why theyre all dead or sad
her and xue yang measuring each other up was so entertaining lmao
its the funniest thing when hes like. HERES MY SAD STORY. FOR WHY IM A SADISTIC MURDERER. I BROKE MY HAND ONCE.
like ok someone broke his hand in a horrible way, and like Poverty, i get it but also like.......... that lost the brunt of a proper sob story like, 50 sadistic murders ago bby
and i love that xingchen does not entertain that for a second hes like ‘not ?????? good enough???’ and the best thing is he wasnt even like 'u hadto be the bigger person' or sth but ' well then break that dudes hand back, rip his arm off for i care, what do the rest of us have to do w anything???”
anjo sensato :(
xue yang is like..... the sexy sadistic evil version of a himbo..... a meanbo...
the fucked upness of xy’s feelings for xxc/ xxc and sl feelings for each other... like my dude literally gave his bf HIS EYES. and xy getting so attached to xxc .... the fucked up fake domesticity.... having him hurt sl..... then desperately trying to bring him back ...................... oof
song lan........... literally had his eyes AND tongue removed, his bfs eyes put in place, was almost killed, turned into a puppet by his bf unknowingly, manipulated by xy, sees his bf killing himself in despair.... and STILL finds the strenght to get up from there, and keep on traveling and helping people and attempting to fix xxcs soul.......... like, my man. damn.
wangxian looking at songxiao and seeing an Actually more painful parallel for themselves. ft. that Color Coding.
THE A-YUAN/SIZHUI REVEAL PUNCHED ME IN THE HEART but in a good way for a change
should have know that he would be the Best Boy the cute one w all the braincells
the butterfly AND the bunny lantern. i see how it is
u know is very convenient that no one can see the stark black veins on wen nings neck, ever
BAT WEN NING
wns face when lwj comes into wwx room like ‘:0 omg did u two finally get your shit together? good for you master wei good for u’
(they didnt) (yet)
DISASTER DRUNK LWJ. JUST. THRUST SOME CHICKENS TO SHOW UR RESSURECTED BAE THAT U LOVE THEM.
i have absolutely no idea WHY they gave lwj the same punishment for fighting his own sect/allies to protect the burial mounds as when they got drunk on cloud recess class days.... like? its such a ... emotional continuity error again
also is lwj gonna get an actual friend besides wwx , ever
mianmian marrying and having a family and a cute life after saying FUCK U AND UR SYSTEM TOO in a much less unhinged and dramatic way than wwx......... fills me w joy
also lol the idea that like. her husband not knowing that shes friends w satan/the boogey man/the village witch is hilarious
i love nie mingjue bc hes the resident Though Guy but also the most dramatic bitch in this show and thats Saying Something
jin ling cant have one uneventful relative can he
the fact that everyone present already knew “mo xuanyu” was wwx at the stairs is so funny, their faces are like ‘oh............ wow. that. sure is a development. shock”
in the tradition of extremely loud whispers wwx tells lwj with twelve guards standing like one meter away from them: HEY PSH LAN ZHAN PRETEND IM FORCING YOU TO STAY W ME DO IT
oh my god oh my god
the absolute Yearning on his face when he leaves wwx and a-yuan at the burial mounds and refuses to stay for dinner was already Enough but the fact?? they brought it back?? to this declaration of love?? their expressions??????? strike me dead right now just go ahead
lFor Legal Reasons We Cant Kiss but we will have a very sappy declaration of love and trust and look at each other in way that is the actualization of 💞💘💗💖💓💘💞💗💖💘💗💖💕💞
also icb all the sect leaders and guards are standing there watching them say they like like each other with a dozen swords pointing at their neck
i enjoyed the depiction of the fickle public perception and how easily it can be used to scapegoat people. when the sect leaders turn on jgy and wwx knows thats its more for convenience than anything else...
poor lxc is literally like 'oh so when YOUR problematic boyfriend gets called evil its a misunderstanding but when its MY problematic bf-'
ok like i cant get over nmj let jgy play a song that messed with his temperament at all, like maN u KNEW he might be shady wth
wwx: “hey dont say anything bad abt lan zhan hes not an arrogant dick, thats just his face.
ME ON THE OTHER HAND"
the cultivators as wwx is poking holes in their narrative is literally *nazaré meme*
"wei wuxian-!" "what did i break your leg, too?" not to be problematic but i laughed so hard
not as hard as "you dont have the rank to talk to me " tho
i Enjoy that, over the course of story, wwx sees that... theres nothing truly to Do, but move on. he saw how his arrogance and his mistakes hurt others, and hes trying to fix what he can, but he already did die for his mistakes and there are things he cant fix and that's. just how it is. even towards jgy, the narrative doesn't go gleefully and completely with "lets make THEM pay bc theyre the big bad" bc its not that simple, and it wouldn't lead anywhere but more pain...
re him and jiang cheng and the wens and kinda. isnt that what nhs did? scheming to displace jgy out of revenge more than any justice and doing so in the most painful way?
idk if that actually makes sense im truly just babbling
i thought the scene at the lotus pond would be CUTE but the context was PAIN again
jiang cheng finding out about his golden core and his conflict with wwx at the guanyin temple .... destroyed me but in a nice way kinda.... same way it destroys him look at his face oh god
and. the fact??? he sacrificed himself for wwx?? first?? and he'll probably never tell anyone much less wwx???? keeps me up at night
i havent decided if the neckbreak transition between jgy does sth super Evil or does he he does OR Does He yes he does O R does heeeee is sth i dislike or not
jin guangyao and wei wuxians most interesting parallel is that... theyve both seen 'hmm hey this system is fucked up' and wwx went 'so fuck it all i will renounce it and challenge it' and jgy went 'so fuck it i will use all of it to my advantage and manipulate it to my goals and whims'
the fact jgys mom was actually great and he loved her and his whole issue w it was more than simply being ashamed of being a bastard kinda got me ngl
never trust a dude with a fan.
nhs and jgy: the first rule to a convoluted and decades spanning violent revenge plot is to have fun and be yourself!
when a-yuan finally FINALLY remembers ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; wen ning has someone in his family back and a-yuan has someone to talk abt his wen family and wwx has him back bc he survived and lwj raised him anD HES THEIR SON. THEYRE MARRIED AND HAVE A SON. UGH.
and theyre allowed to heal. everyone is allowed to try and recover and be happy
netflix put all of the 3 endings on top of each other and it looks kinda weird actually BUT I DONT EVEN MIND :’’’’’’’’’)
the gasp that left me when lwj says ‘wei ying’ and wwx turns.........
there was also a screen with ‘thank you mxtx for creating these characters, we hope their wishes come true’ and i might. have cried then too. maybe.
that was . a ride. as is proven by this behemot of a ramble clearly i just really needed and Outlet. i am currently trying to convince dumb monkey brain to not consume the other medias of mdzs immediately bc i REALLY need to like. live. a life. and take care of real responsibilities. *longest oh boi ever*
#m.#ANYWAY#ENOUGH TALKING#THIS IS SO LONG#LOL#but whatever this is MY performative journaling i do what i want#rambling impressions abt what i watch is a thing i do now? apparently??#cql#untamed#the untamed#fun fact that chat is named 'k keeps on babbling abt the untamed' and it STILL wasnt enough#also it took me 15 episodes to realize lwj was yibo#IT WAS V SHOCKING#i did not recognize him at a l l#but in retrospect he WAS the perfect choice
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I'll be honest,if the weasley kids had a tv show I would have percy as my favourite. Bill aand charlie arent in it so I wouldnt have an opinion (they're obviously hinted at but never there) Arthur's gonna annoy me kinda, molly is really nice but she always compares her kids. Ron (as lovely as he is) can be really mean to percy and just sucky to him. I love Ginny but everyone knows jk made her because "girl power= not feminine traits!1!1!1!" I love her,I love her love for quidditch but I feel like I still clearly see what she represents and that's jks sentiments (like cho for example, as an asian it's never gonna leave my mind). The twins would be great in theory but 2 twins insulting their older brother, burning a hole through their brothers tongue? Pranking everybody ALL THE TIME? I say I love them but seriously if I studied at hogwarts I would loathe them because hey, were in class- prank somebody in a more boring one or after. Also they're way too mean to percy.
Percy is the kinda dude I'd identify with, I hate how his family shames him alot. Sure hes ambitious but at the same time I hate when they bully him for his pride in his prefect badge and his head boy badge, like CMON! Gryffindor traits??? PRIDEFUL like yeah hes gonna be happy because he feels accomplished. I remember getting into model un and I talked about it at dinner time,my siblings got kinda annoyed but did they insult me abt it? No! They understood that this was a big part of my pride. They teased me a little "Haha model un-er" or "your rooms the country your representing right? Oops I dont have my passport" regular happy sibling stuff. You dont insult your brothers pride and joy, it's obvious hes so happy about it.
If there's gonna be a show on the Weasley family, the only interestee Weasley I would be watching is for Percy. Now let's go through every Weasley.
Arthur- at work, never home, if at home in shed exploring muggle things instead of probably bonding with his children.
Molly-would do chores, help children and maybe chat with next door neigbour. A slight chance of bonding with kids. Not very entertaining really.
Bill and Charlie- I mean depends whether they're even there or gone. If they're there they'd probably argue with each other. Maybe we'll get the Bill earring story and Charlie dragon obsession. Other than that maybe sibling bonding which is always good.
Twins- I cannot emphasize enough as to why I wouldn't watch the twins, if there was such a tv show. Each episode they'll probably prank someone most probably Ron and Percy. And then these pranks would get violent and physical and they would still be the saints and Percy the villain.
I mean the twins cause Ron's phobia, almost make him take the Unbreakable Vow (Ron was 5!) and then beat his Puffskein to death.
AND PUFFSKEIN IS AN ANIMAL.
And that's only Ron. If I start on Percy the jokes are endless but let's just end with the twins tried to locked Percy in a pyramid( God knows how old!). Enough said.
Ron- We already have Ron content in the book. Do we really need more? Yes we do but not if it's Ron insulting Percy. And if this show was before Harry and Hogwarts then Ron would be a young child like 9-10 years old and I personally wouldn't be interested. I love Ron but he loses absolutely no moment to insult or bitch about his brother. Plus Ron is whiny. Sometimes.
Ginny- They'll probably make her a Mary Sue who can do no wrong. They would seriously do that and make her a female version of the twins. Sorry not interested in watching her.
When we come to Percy there are so many things we can do. We can see bonding with Bill or Charlie. Percy being a good older brother and helping with nightmares. Percy being his mother's support system. Percy helping Arthur with his work. Percy teaching Ron chess. Percy planning a prank with twins. Percy playing dolls with Ginny.
With Percy you can relate him to everyone in some way or another. We know Molly loves Percy and probably considers him her favorite. Probably. Arthur with the Ministry so Percy and Ministry. Percy going to Bill with help for studies. Percy helping Charlie research about dragons.(Percy telling Charlie his dormmate is crazy about quidditch and asking if Charlie could give him tips and an autograph)
Percy playing chess with Ron. We know Percy is protective over Ron and Ginny. So we can assume that Percy teaches Ron chess and helps him read. Percy reading to Ginny about Harry Potter.(Really though who else would have? Molly would be busy and Bill and Charlie wouldn't)
Or we can have Percy writing stuff. Short stories and articles. Percy being a writer. Percy singing , dancing or drawing. Percy sneaking to Muggle town and talking to them.
Percy finding Scabbers.
Percy going to the Lovegood residence and talking with Luna's mother because she is such an amazing person.
(And taking her death the hardest)
Also Percy bonding with Luna.
Percy bonding with Uncle Billius or Great Aunt Muriel. Also reminsing time with Uncle Gideon and Fabian.
Percy having babysitter called Lily Potter who looked just like him but with bright green eyes. She reads to him about adventure stories and tells him she loves him very much and once brought her husband with her(who's an animagus!)
(While his brothers rejoiced the fall of You Know Who, Percy cried because Miss Lily and Mr James were dead. That was the time Percy realised that bad things happen to good people)
Well to put it in short there are so many angles with Percy which makes him interesting in my opinion.
If they do make let's hope they don't screw Percy over like they did with him in that damn game.
Also for that Percy interacting with Muggles there's an interesting fanfic called Percy's Diary.
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/7542632/1/Percy-s-Diary
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
Percy is the only Weasley who I can relate to which makes me love him more. I am an elder sibling, have been constantly insulted by family and friends for following rules and very rarely been put down for being excited for something.
And the whole making fun of Percy is bullying when they're laughing at him and not with him.
These 2 prepositions make all the difference when it comes to teasing and bullying.
And the twins are bullies. They are.
"Oh, are you a prefect, Percy? You should've said something, we had no idea."
This is one of the lines they say.
How much do you want to bet that the twins didn't say something like this to Bill when he became prefect and HeadBoy?
Percy was a constant butt of their jokes and pranks, including bewitching his prefect and Head Boy badges to read Pinhead and Bighead Boy respectively, and sending dragon dung to his office at the Ministry.
This is from the official wikia. People can try to make the twins saint and say it was all good natured and everything. But I will always see the twins as bullies.
And the thing is the twins and Ron never bothered to praise Percy and that just feels wrong. Everytime they talk about Percy it's qn insult. When I talk about my brother to an acquaintance I don't insult him unlike Ron.
I feel that as Percy fans we love him because he is complicated. He isn't like the rest of the Weasleys. He isn't charming or funny. He's just a normal guy trying to do better and Percy fans get it because it's relatable. We can relate to being ordinary. He doesn't have earrings or pranks or a saviour best friend. He's just a guy who follows rules and wants to be successful. Who wouldn't relate with that?
And maybe some of us have been ridiculed just like Percy so we understand. We also understand that this is Harry's biased view and all he has been told about Percy is usually by Ron or the twins who insult him on a regular basis. And Harry is no better! He uses words like pompously like he understands how a person talks pompously?
So I love Percy a lot because I relate to him and I would never in my life apologise for loving such a complicated character.
#percy weasley#percy weasley deserves better#ask in a box#thanks for the ask!#twin weasleys criticism#all weasleys except for Percy criticism#but not much
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Bud I’m sorry to swing into your inbox uninvited like this but my soul is having an OOTS renaissance thanks to your content in the tag and did you say Leverage AU
haha holy SHIT this got Long. but yes. i’ve been. Thinking. (also literally Never feel like you have to apologize for sending me messages. i was Hoping someone would ask me about this. now i have an Excuse to share EVERYTHING ive written abt it :3)
Obviously, Roy is the leader/brains of the outfit. He grew up having some Strong Opinions abt what’s Legal versus what’s Right due to tragic backstory involving the death of his little brother which was definitely SOMEONE’S fault for negligence but since there technically wasn’t any illegal behavior, there were no consequences for it. Also he’s still angry at his dad bc he thinks his dad is also partly culpable (and also also just a dick). He’s the Moral Backbone of the team (alongside Durkon, more on that later) in basically the same way Nate was in og Leverage. He’s actually not the best at figuring out what people want (that’s Haley and, shockingly, occasionally Elan), but once he has that info, he is the absolute best at figuring out the ideal plan of attack to use in any given case.
Haley is still a thief. I mean she maps to Parker almost PERFECTLY. Her dad was a thief & a conman, her mom wasn’t but knew about it and mostly accepted it, but she died tragically in a mugging gone wrong or smth, which made Ian crank the paranoia WAY up and taught Haley to do the same in the name of “safety”. Let’s keep the “Ian is in Trouble and Haley needs money, Fast” which is why she signs on to the first job in the first place. She’s less acrobatic than Parker, tending towards finding (or making) weak spots in security, but she can still make a tumble check when she needs to.
Elan is the grifter who is somehow an Idiot but also not???? It baffles everyone. When he’s playing a part for a con, he’s FLAWLESS, but then the rest of the time he’s just. No Thoughts Head Empty. He probably gets lured in initially because he’s decided to try his hand at being part of a full team, rather than the two-man cons he’s been running that invariably end w his partner conning him as well and stealing half of his take. Also he likes the idea of being Crime Friends. He’s that tweet where it’s like, Roy: “after the heist is over, we split up and never communicate again” / Elan: [about to unveil his Crime Buddies Forever Friendship Quilt Puppets]: “never?”
Vaarsuvius is the hacker/gadget person. They have a Vaguely Snobby Yet Unidentifiable accent, dyed(?) purple hair (nobody has ever seen their roots) and nobody knows who they “really” are or where they came from, but they’re good at what they do so everyone just accepts the mystery. They probably got suckered into the team by their initial employer (who I’ll get to Eventually, lol) framing it as a challenge to their intellect, like, “oh, I see, you’re not smart enough to make this team work for you...” to which they were like Fucking Watch Me and also melted his computer. Anyways. They are joined (digitally) by their Intrepid Friend And Co-Conspirator (his words, not theirs), a fellow hacker known only as Blackwing, or, on certain forums, Blackwing_Bird. (In the first season, V only occasionally references him when saying they’re “calling in extra help” or smth for a particularly complex hack job. He starts showing up a little more in s2 and eventually by the start of s4 is a regular & established presence, but only appears as actions in a computer interface or output.) Elan is convinced he’s an AI, Belkar doesn’t think he actually exists, Haley pretends she doesn’t think he exists, and Durkon and Roy try not to think about it too hard, as long as B and V still get the job done.
Belkar is the hitter. He is on the team bc their initial employer got him out of jail for it. He doesn’t have a tragic backstory, he just likes doing violent crimes. As the series progresses, he grows some empathy & stuff, but really only for people who actually deserve it. Assholes still get decked. It’s all very touching. (Also he has dwarfism caused by achondroplasia. It doesn’t actually bother him and is useful in fights bc his opponents frequently have no fucking clue how to approach him, but he likes Pretending to take offense at stupid things just to see how far he can go with it.)
Aaaand last but not least, Durkon is the least involved member of the team. He’s actually a career criminal and Roy’s mentor, and wasn’t a member of the initial team that [redacted, I’ll tell you later, PROMISE] put together for a couple of reasons, the main one being that he’s Officially retired in order to spend more time with his family, which consists of his mom, his friend (not girlfriend) Hilgya, baby Kudzu, and a truly stunning number of aunts, uncles, and cousins. Roy frequently calls or visits him for advice and he Occasionally shows up to help out on local jobs, but generally he avoids doing crime if he can (as part of a deal with Hilgya, who is also a career criminal; basically, they’ve both cut back on the crime in order to provide a more stable home environment for Kudzu. But sometimes, you gotta do a little crime, and in those cases, Sigdi enjoys spending time w her grandson.)
NOW. THE BIG REVEAL YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR. Who got the team together in the first place?!
The answer: Lord Shojo (or whatever Normal Person Name you want to assign him). Now this is where it gets tricky: he had them do a thing that they thought was good, THEN they thought it was BAD, but then when they confronted him he revealed that it Appearing to be bad was actually a test of character and would they consider working as basically internal investigators for him? But then he had a heart attack, so, rip. But THEN it turned out that he’d left them a bunch of money anyway and they were all feeling kind of Inspired so they formed the Order of the Stick, LLC (which, no, i am not coming up with a new name, actually, because I just don’t care. someone else can come up w a justification for that name, tho, i’m sure it’s possible). Also Miko was there and was unhappy abt their actions, and also their general existence.
Moving on. Villains!
Redcloak is the Sterling replacement, because that DEEPLY amuses me.
Xykon is a season-long main villain, probably one that Redcloak finds himself working for but then “teams up with” (read: blackmails) the Order to bring him down bc even Redcloak finds Xykon distasteful. That’s season 3, let’s say.
Tarquin is another season villain, say season 2. Nale probably shows up pretty early in s1, actually, as another recurring antagonist like Sterling but uh. Less good at it. Anyways the s2 final 3 eps deal with them (accidentally) discovering that Tarquin runs some Evil Empire Company, then trying to outplay him and take him down. Idk if Nale still dies in this version tbh.
Tsukiko is a one-off s1 villain who returns briefly in s4 alongside Miko, who has gone well and truly off the rails.
Season 1 finale has to do w Roy finally getting Vengeance for his little brother.
The vampire squad is the s4 finale villain who do smth terrible to Durkon and then get the Mother Of All Revenge served up to them by the Order.
I envision the show as being 5 seasons (like og Leverage) but I’m not going to sketch out s5 because I think it should be based off whatever happens in the current story arc, possibly involving some legacy of the OotSquiggle.
Other stuff!
The Order of the Squiggle is a legendary criminal team from the 60s who stole a BUNCH of famous shit & then proceeded to legendarily implode. This has no bearing on the plot I’ve sketched out, I just think it’s fun.
The Sapphire Guard members should probably be reworked as FBI. I don’t care about most of them but I do think that Lien and O-Chul could be like, FBI agents who Choose to look the other way while the Order does their very-much-not-legal-but-still-fair Justice Crime, and maybe even help them out on occasion.
So, the Final season-by-season outline, based on everything I’ve written so far:
s1 e1: getting the team together, doing a con for Shojo, then at the end he dies and the gang is like “dang what now?" and intend to split up except then they Don’t.
mid-s1: Nale shows up and tries to trick the Order, but then gets beat like a drum.
late s1: Tsukiko is an underling of the Villain Of The Week, winds up in police custody. But She’ll Be Back.
s1 finale: Roy’s Vengeance: The Vengeaning. also we meet Redcloak as an antagonist.
s2 e1: the truth abt Haley’s father comes out
early s2: The Two Live Crews Job but it’s the Order vs the Linear Guild and the Linear Guild ARE all bad guys.
mid-s2: Redcloak returns. ugh.
late s2: the sapphire guard FBI makes its first appearance, hello O-Chul and Lien.
s2 pre-finale: once again they’re in conflict w Nale over smth, he spends the whole episodes making Cryptic Remarks, they basically beat him (like a drum!) but then the stinger at the end is that Tarquin reveals himself and Elan is like “Dad?!”, roll credits.
s2 finale, part 1: Elan is hanging out w Tarquin bc he’s DEEP in Denial, the Rest of the team tries to take Tarquin down, but it doesn’t work.
s2 finale, part 2: Elan finally gets a clue and they manage to beat Tarquin. still haven’t decided if Nale dies or not, but I’m leaning towards yes. also they rescue Haley’s dad.
s3 e1: fuck dude idk.
early s3: Redcloak shows up, AGAIN, everyone groans. he has blackmail on them, he wants them to take Xykon down.
mid s3: The Rashomon Job but it’s about stealing the Talisman of Dorukan and it turns out that Nale was there too (“oh!” Elan says. “I was wondering why I looked so weird in all those mirrors! But it wasn’t my reflection, it was Nale’s!” “Sweetie, that wasn’t Nale’s reflection,” says Haley. “Huh,” says Elan, “so the mirrors were broken?”, cue eye rolling from everyone else.), and the Successful thief was Hilgya, who’d nabbed it from the owner before it even went on display.
s3 finale: they beat Xykon, actually factually, because he deserves to get his ass Thoroughly kicked, even if only in AU form. Lien and O-Chul are there, so are some other less helpful FBI people. There’s a bit where O-Chul Exact Wordses his way out of telling his superiors about the Order’s less legal activities without technically lying. King shit.
s4 e1: doesn’t really matter. maybe smth to do w some legacy of Tarquin’s company to set up the drama w Malack & Durkon later.
early s4: Durkon gets SENT TO PRISON. Malack approaches the Order abt this because sure they have Different Ethics but they’re still Friends. (Roy is surprised and a little hurt that he’s never heard of Malack, but he ignores that in favor of Let’s Get Whatever Fuckers Did This To Our Friend.)
immediately after that: Miko and Tsukiko return as a Team, preventing the Order from working on the Durkon situation
mid s4: Redcloak makes another unexpected & unwelcome appearance but he’s maybe a little less of a dick? the Order collaborates with Malack & his Crime Buddies (hello, Vector Legion) to pull one over on him tho, because “less of a dick” does not mean “a pleasant or decent person”, and also he was mean abt Durkon being in jail, so he totally deserved it. he still gets whatever he wanted tho, just takes a blow to his pride. also prevents the Order from helping Durkon. they’re having a LOT of setbacks wonder why that could be, not to make sure the season fills its whole length or anything, no sirree
s4 finale: something something taking down the organization, headed by Hel (yes that’s her real name), which framed Durkon for their Big Crime. Durkon goes free and Extra Firmly retires, For Good, He Swears, but says he “met someone new” who might be an asset.
s5 e1: minrah joins the team! and the episode is set in like, somewhere really snowy. that’s all i got.
the rest of s5: don’t know, don’t care, it’s open-ended until the comic finishes up.
#mine#ask#corvidcorgi#order of the stick#oots#leverage#leverage au#oots au#au#outline#haha this thing clocks in at 1.9k words because i am LITERALLY incapable of shutting up#hope u enjoy it bc i spent Way Too Much Mental Effort mapping out how the OotS plotlines might play out in a leverage setting#and then promptly ignored Most of that in favor of making it funnier & dumber & more villain-of-the-week#(bc lbr the comic is Good but it's got an overarching plot form that the Leverage story style does Not jive with)#i'm not tagging all these characters lol
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the untamed for the ask game?
muahahahahahahaaaa i was waiting for this one thank u 😈😈 physically restrains myself from putting 'xue yang' for every single response even though that would be my answer to every single one unironically
send me a fandom and i’ll tell you my blorbo (and other words)!
blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)
i'm gonna say xue yang twice but only twice i am limiting myself like don't get me wrong i love wwx deeply he would be here in second place bc many thoughts on character analysis but like a very distant second bc of how much i think abt xy. i have no words for how much my braincells go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr thinking abt xue yang????? fucked up little man??? moral compass? no. candy? absolutely. murder is a love language? only for xxc. hotel? trivago.
scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)
SIZHUI HE IS BEST BOI AND I WOULD JUST SQUISH HIM HE DESERVES SO MANY HUGS HE IS SUCH A GOOD BOI
scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)
is nie huaisang underappreciated????? underrated? mayhaps, mayhaps not, but either way he is my scrimblo. my bimblo, if u will. i'm a whore for a chaotic neutral manipulative little man who knows nothing and also everything only when it is perfectly convenient and is a gossip with a fan and some birbs. absolute banger character arc bestie
glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)
MIAN MIAN if u saw ming ming bb i'm so sorry is she considered obscure??? queen, badass, i was so thrilled when we saw her again in the Future like YES GO OFF QUEEN WE LOVE U KEEP IT UP
poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)
oh come on u know i had to say meng yao, there's no other option here tbh since i can't put xue yang for every one
horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)
xue yang xue yang xue yang i would like to put him in a jar and shake him violently i would like to poke his silly little brain cells and pull on his silly little heartstrings and just see what happens i want to break him into tiny little pieces and then smash them with a hammer
eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)
su she. every day i think about the 'that fucking guy' post that i literally cannot find bc tumblr post search is shit but how su she is the most fucking guy ever bc i had the exact reaction rewatching it going 'oh it's THAT fucking guy???'
send me a fandom and i’ll tell you my blorbo (and other words)!
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YESSSSS YOU’RE BACK AND TAKING ASKS
14 and 15 for the most recent post, and I’m gonna come back with more too
Here we go!!!!
14. At what point in writing do you come up with a title?
Honestly, it usually differs from piece to piece! Usually, though, the title comes last! (Though I do have a short list of potential titles for Li Cu fics stored away, most of which are just lyrics from songs xD Whether I end up using them or not, only time will tell!)
15. Which is harder: titles or summaries (or tags)?
All of these tend to give me a bit of trouble xD if I was to rank from hardest to easiest however, I think I'd say titles are the hardest and tags tend to be the easiest. For summaries I usually just slap a portion of the fic in and then add a small almost-summary below it, mostly because I feel like giving a sample of the fic will be more effective than trying to give a succinct description? Kind of shows you what you're getting into before you've even clicked xD
Titles, I use a lot of lyrics from songs, especially ones that I think fit with the character. Though, this does sometimes mean my titles are... long and it can make it a little awkward when trying to talk about the fics themselves. xD
Examples include;
"Come with me, I promise the water is fine..." Which is a lyric from God Bless Eric Taylor by Marietta, a song that I relate to Li Cu somewhat.
This next one is the title of a chapter instead of a whole fic, but I'll count it anyway xD Chapter 2 of I'm Here is titled: "I have this dream that I'm hitting my dad with a baseball bat and he is screaming and crying for help..." which is from the song Father by The Front Bottoms.
I ideally try to make it so that the lyrics also match up with the contents of the chapter/fic. I'm Here's second chapter is all about Li Cu's nightmares, so I thought the title would be pretty fitting xD Honestly, thinking back maybe I could've added more types of dreams.... Ones that fit that title even more.... Small rewrite of that Chapter perhaps? I don't think it would be that different, but still... Would add more angst onto everything xD
The title for "Come with me..." Also sort of relates to the contents of the fic, but moreso in the following line that appears in the summary: "I need something else to comvince me I won't die."
Honestly these lines could have me ranting a whole lot, especially in relation to Li Cu. Just makes me think of all his conflicted feelings, and how he must feel when he drags his friends into the mess he didn't even make. (And these feeling really would increase after Su Wan blames him for the snake bite and getting Shen Qiong inveolved, and during just... the entirety of the time he, Yang Hao, Su Wan and Liang Wan are in the desert together. (ESPECIALLY when Yang Hao is being absolutely mistreated by the 9 families, like sheesh.)
It's just a whole lot of guilt, but also maybe some stubborn determination? Li Cu is very adamant on living just to spit in the face of everyone around him. Existing out of pure spite, but with friends involved, it's more like he's existing to fulfil a purpose? One that he feels like he's bestowed upon himself. Not Wu Xie, or Rishan, or anyone. Just him. He stays alive so he can protect his friends. He'll keep them safe, he'll get them home alive. He has to. And he knows that he will. Or else, what is he even persevering for? "I need something to convince me I won't die." In the fic, this could also be referring to Wu Xie, as he kind of marks safety by the end of the drama. Wu Xie being there means it's okay. It means he doesn't have to fight anymore. And in the fic, it also means that Li Cu can let go. Of Everything. Permanently. (I have so many branching ideas based on that 300 word demon of a fic, you wouldn't even believe)
ANYWAY I'LL STOP RANTING ABT THAT FIC MAYBE I'LL TALK ABOUT THAT FIC MORE IN DEPTH SOME OTHER TIME IF PPL WANT IT.
As for tags, I struggle mostly because I never know what's okay to tag? I'm afraid of tagging a fic with something if the content of that particular tag doesn't show up all that much in the fic? Unless it's something that's a potnential trigger, and then I'll tag it, even if it's small. Just ot be safe. But like. Characters, I don't tag unless they're actually there and present and doing something. If they're mentioned, I tend to not tag them since it's not all that crucial? For people to know they show up for a second? Idk, I like to be as succinct and precise as possible with my tags, because I know how annoying it is for tags to be clogged or for fics to have too many tags xD
4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)
I have a few, surprisingly! I'll choose two, both from the second chapter of I'm Here!
"Each one makes him wake up, terrified and shaky and wanting to hide or just outright stop existing; to become intangible, untouchable, safe. Of course, he can't actually do that, so instead he pushes the fear down and suffocates it before burying it in the backyard of his mind in the hopes it'll never be dug up again."
Something I try and do while writing is find ways to explain how I. Just. Experience life? (This is also present in Chapter 1 with the line "Further frustration gathered in his chest, making it tighten with stress before it shot up into his throat". Just little things that I've never really seen in words before? That I feel but never know how to accurately describe.) There's always the whole "let the void swallow me/him/her/them whole" thing in media that I love because, honestly, mood. But I guess for this I just wanted to word it differently? In the way I felt was most accurate to myself. Just to be in a state of which nothing can get you, be it life or that one imaginary demon that you sometimes think is lurking around the house at the convenient time of 3 AM, Y'know? When real life becomes TOO real and you just want to blip out for a second, just pause everything and have a moment to be free of everything xD
I also just kind of like the metaphor(?) with his fear. Trust Li Cu to not only associate feelings with violence, but also treat his feelings violently xD I feel like I'm not the best when it comes to imagery and creative expression, especially through words. I point out the obvious, the facts, a lot, both when speaking normally and in writing, and it takes a bit of time for me to remember that I'm writing a story and not jotting a list of events xD So anytime I actually come up with something more kind of creatively written, I feel particularly happy with myself.
"He can't even fully comprehend what's been going on - everything feels bizarre and just out of reach, moreso than usual - but what he does know is that Wu Xie is here and he's angry. The man stands above Li Cu, his cold calculating eyes burning him with wordless accusations that, despite their ambiguity, feel justified. There's guilt, desperation and denial crashing inside him like waves assaulting a rickety raft on a stormy sea. What these feelings are for, he doesn't know. It makes him want to plead for forgiveness all the same."
Let's be honest, Li Cu probably has way too many mixed feelings on Wu Xie. The man who simultaneously built him up and destroyed him. The man who caused him agony, but is also probably one of the best things to come into Li Cu's life??? Like damn, I think I'd be pretty conflicted if I was Li Cu. And things only get worse when, in this fic's timeline, Wu Xie essentially ghosts Li Cu out of guilt for what he did to the kid. This is taken wrong by Li Cu, and he ends up feeling abandoned. By his own kidnapper. I just feel like this snippet is pretty okay at capturing all the blame he puts onto himself, and captures some of the trauma that comes with the events of Sha Hai as well. I just kind of like how this paragraph turned out in the end. xD
6. What character do you have the most fun writing
LI CU!!! Absolutely Li Cu. I don't know exactly what it is but it just. Clicks with me? Or at least the version I write of himd does, it's probably not even close to Li Cu's canon portrayal xD Maybe it's because of the fact that I'm also an angsty, angry 19 year old that I feel as such? It's much easier to put myself in the mind of a teenage boy rather than a 40 year old man xD In terms of non DMBJ writings, I have OCs that I love writing for! Funnily enough, one is an angsty 19 year old boy with a lot of self-worth issues (ringing any bells?) and the other is an angry, confused and conflicted character that was modified to be a kind of living weapon, but had since escaped and repressed all their memories of what happened. Though, the memories eventually start to resurface and they begin to question themself a whole lot, with flashbacks haunting the corners of their mind and driving them deeper and deeper into guilt-filled despair.
In general, angsty characters with a lot of conflicted emotions are super fun to write for! To flicker around from thought to thought and dive into all the hidden feelings that a character can have. It's just super enjoyable for me xD
#writing this while also writing an essay#it's helping me turn those rusty head gears#i feel like i can finally write things again xD#THANK YOU FOR THE ASKS SIERRA! I hope my answers were satisfactory!! xD#i think i went way too off-topic with some of these but honestly when do i ever stay on topic????#ask game#undying prattle#ramblerambleramble#miiiight edit this tomorrow to make it more comprehensible#but for now you can have this mess of a post xD
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HLO slinks in thru a bead curtain.......... truly sry this took me so long to concoct bt i’m here now, hand on hip, smiling coyly at u all...... i’m nai n i’m rly excited to b here so i’ll just dive right in!! u can find bradley’s pinterest board here n her muse tag here. like this or hmu for plots!
[ cis female, she/her, margaret qualley , twenty-four ] i can’t be sure, but i think i just saw BRADLEY MILLIGAN drive onto the parkway. don’t they know we’re not supposed to be driving on that haunted road right now? maybe it has to do with the fact that they’re so +RESILIENT and -VOLATILE that makes them feel UNPHASED about everything going on. i guess we could also chalk it up to the fact that they’re always reminding me of LEMON IN A FRESH CUT, THE AMBER BLINK OF AN ANGRY ALLEY CAT, GRINNING WITH BLOOD ON YOUR TEETH. either way, i hope they get back safely. [ nai, she/her, 24, gmt ]
aesthetics: singeing a hole in your fishnets with the cherry of a menthol, spitting a pistachio behind the bar just to hear it ping off the nozzle top bottles, lemon in a fresh cut, a war torn poppy standing alone in an empty field, pressing thumbs to yellow bruises, stomping over flowerbeds when there’s a path right besides it, dangling over ledges just to feel your chest jolt, a snarling rottweiler that needs muzzling, limp feet poking out behind a door, ‘I PROMISE I DON’T BITE’ scrawled on a name tag, slapping a bald head in front of you at the cinema like it’s a bongo, not owning a single jacket that isn’t stolen, driving a stranger’s car down the wrong lane against the screaming traffic, hair more feral than a wolf cub and eyes smudgier than a coal mine.
BACKGROUND:
ok SO. her father owns a strip club in crescent hill named no angels. it’s kind of.... a seedy establishment i won’t lie. hs a red glowing sign like it’s lighting up a window in amsterdam. cigarette butts floating in oil slick puddles outside. unsavoury characters crawling all over like rats in a sewer. despite this it’s a legitimate business on the surface of things n it does pretty well in trade. it’s like.... that place people warn u NOT to have ur bachelor party at unless u fancy urself the type tht willingly enters a lion’s den bt tht almost??? adds to the allure in a way??? ppl r like wow so sketchy it’s the thrill of a lifetime........ i mean run while u still can bt go off i guess
it isn’t Confirmed Public Knowledge bt it’s pretty heavily implied thru the rumour mill that bradley’s father is the head of a gang of rly............ Not Nice people. all the ppl that work for him u would hands down NOT want to run into in a dark alley. while things seem legitimate on the suface it’s pretty clear they’re into shady dealings n the townsfolk that suspect that would indeed b correct! the club’s a front for a drug business n they’re also washing n running counterfeit cash thru it. they probably also have their hands dipped into a few other local businesses to run their cash thru these too n keep it all seemingly by the books so nobody comes sniffing around. they even r friends with a member of local law enforcement that’s working w them for a cut so they honestly have all bases covered to keep things airtight n foolproof. perhaps a business in reed too which bradley oversees bt i haven’t given this Too Much thought as of yet??
so ya she’s grown up fairly local most of her life n would maybe be known around town as such.................. the milligans r certainly Interesting as far as families go so like. it honestly wldn’t surprise me if ppl nudge elbows when they see one of them coming n immediately walk in the opposite direction. just quite an intimidating presence...... they’re like caged animals where ur specifically instructed NOT to stick ur fingers between the bars bc they WILL bite
on a more personal note her dad is pretty much the worst human being alive n bradley hs like….. a lot of issues with herself as a result of years of toxicity n abuse
in terms of more family bkground info her mum’s name was alyssa n she vanished when bradley was 12. jst like…. into thin air. nothing. no note. zilch. gan! n when bradley asked her dad abt it his response was essentially “guess she didn’t love us enough to stay”. as bradley’s got older tho n become (without intention) more involved in the business side of things, it’s become pretty clear there was far more to the story.
(abuse tw) they had a horrible marriage n tony ws emotionally manipulative at the best of times, violent at worst, which didn’t help the fact tht alyssa ws struggling a lot w severe depression n rly just… not in the mindset to b dealing w anything else, even where motherhood ws concerned. bradley p much… would look after her a lot n they’d both b scared of her dad n it was just a whole unhealthy mess.
(death implied tw) anyway im rambling bt basically tony (bradley’s dad) gt wind of alyssa sleeping w men tht worked fr him n he just… got rid. bradley’s kind of worked out over the yrs tht her mum didn’t jst leave on her own accord n tht something must hav happened to her bt she’s too scared of her dad to ever directly accuse him
when her mum went all of her dad’s cruelty pretty mch got channelled straight onto her. it ws diluted between two before bt as u can probably imagine her upbringing was jst…. a steep downhill decline
(drugs implied tw) she learnt ways 2 deal w the incurring trauma bt they weren’t healthy ones at all! bsically jst. will do or take anything fr the distraction. chases a thrill like it’s the only way to remind her she’s alive. has absolutely no regard fr her own wellbeing n often gets other ppl in trouble too bc she’s so insatiably reckless
(hospitalisation tw) she hd….2 separate stints of psychiatric hospitalisation n she never tlks abt it. like ever. acknowledging she’s been vulnerable is her worst nightmare n bc of the way her dad raised her she always thinks any sign of struggling within herself is weakness. truly does…. not kno how to properly emotion
CUT TO!!!! the present. she’s currently living at the motel which is like. the least homely place she cld ever live rly but bradley loves making her life uncomfortable n doesn’t rly believe in growing sentimentally attached to anything if she cn help it <3 probably gets into arguments all the time w her neighbours it’s a whole thing.... atrocious at feeding herself has breakfasts frm the vending machine like her organs aren’t screaming fr vegetables.... plays music too loud n sometimes vanishes for days at a time without a word. she’s a lot.
i honestly feel like the murders haven’t rly phased bradley too hugely....... i won’t lie she probably genuinely is like. oh maybe it’s smthn to do w my dad. n just blinks the other way not rly that phased. on some subconscious level i think she rly just thinks........ death follows her wherever she goes n is like. this is just life for me! kind of depressing. holds her hand bt then screams n pulls away when she inevitably bites me.
PERSONALITY:
the kind of sour cherry only certain people have a taste for
once drank a bottle of whiskey, insisted she could still do a cartwheel and accidentally kicked an old man’s front tooth out in the process. proceeded 2 collapse into a flower bed and laugh so much abt it that she cried
barely takes anything seriously 50% of the time and is angry the other 50%
if she was a coffee she’d be black with five grains of sugar that you couldn’t taste until the last sip
(alcoholism tw) high functioning alcoholic. if u ever see her w a coffee cup u jst kno tht one sniff will confirm high alcohol percentage. honestly idk hw she does it her liver must b yellin
loyal to a point of fault. if she cares abt u (rare) and u murder a man in cold blood (not so rare in the broad scheme of bradley’s life) she’ll brawl anyone that says ur guilty
honestly wld probably fight a person over anything. sometimes she’ll jst be having a bad day n she’ll burst n take it out on whoever says the wrong thing. minefield!
has the worst luck in romance…. ever. ALL her past bfs hav been absolute beasts n as a result she has the ‘romance is dead n love is a lie’ mentality. definitely NOT a romantic. very cut n dry abt these things. sex is mostly just sex n she’d kind of scoff at anyone that wanted more from her
mostly wears stolen clothes from strangers and jackets that swamp her. huge chunky stomping boots with steel toe caps that would RLY bruise if they gave u a kick. hair is p much always a wild mess n she usually hs kind of smudgy/smoky makeup bcos apparently she’s allergic to combs and generally looking presentable… relatable content. the only time she rly looks put together is when she has to do something/go somewhere/see someone on behalf of her father....... he kind of uses her as a sort of. honey pot sometimes fr shit his gang get up to it’s like. not! a way u should ever utilise ur daughter but :/ i cannot stress enough how much i wna drop kick him in the neck
she’s v sarcastic. blunt. kind of has a habit of…. assessing a person n she’s quite perceptive bc she’s been trained to b by the way she always has to monitor her dad’s expression fr the slightest emotion change. she’s very confident n can p much mke a conversation out of whatever if she feels like it. independent too like she hs a bunch of (predominantly surface connection) friends bt she doesn’t care abt going out places alone n does this often. she’s probably kind of known around town bt itd b a 50/50 balance between bein known as intimidating n bein known as that one girl tht always gets into anarchy
likes: drunken snow angels that drag on so long they flirt with pneumonia, stealing cars, throwing watermelons off rooftops to watch them explode, shooting pedestrian’s with bb guns from hidden spots on rooftops.
dislikes: telling the truth, tulips so yellow it’s like they’re gloating, playing music loud enough to fry your brain and serve it on a piece of toast, going home.
PLOTS:
someone tht works at the ‘no angels’ strip club?? either as a dancer or bartender or whtever. just a forewarning it’s probably gna b a pretty….. seedy and Not That Pleasant environment bc it’s like. a crime hotspot inevitably bc it’s a gang hangout so. ur chara wld truly be in fr a rollercoaster ride to say the least
(drugs tw) she deals coke fr her dad’s gang so perhaps ur muse buys off her
anyone….. she’s brawled in the past like. she’s literally a menace i cnt express this enough. wil jst randomly throw a drink in someone’s face fr no reason bc she’s bored. she’s probably pissed off 1000 diff ppl in 1000 diff ways. the possibilities r endless n i jst think tht’s a sexy prospect!
fwbs perhaps??? exes??? (probably ws a tumultuous relationship honestly bradley is. a handful...... it’s also rly not often she ties herself down tbh so this would maybe have to b discussed/be circumstantial/kind of rare)
mayb someone tht she met at an aa meeting when she hd to go fr a court mandated thing one time after bein arrested fr public indecency. i feel like there’s probably a rly expensive statue somewhere thts fancily sculpted n she like. did a flying kick n broke the dick of it off n gt arrested fr it
ppl she……. Goes Wild Goes Crazy w. truly jst the most self destructive person alive so anyone w a similar mindset wld b a hellish bt fun combination
on the contrary a gd influence cld b nice perhaps? like someone tht genuinely cares abt her n she jst doesn’t kno hw to compute it
maybe people who r her neighbours that live at the motel too??
OH it could b fun if ur muse runs or works at a local business maybe like. a bar? idk? n bradley n ur muse have developed a rapport bc she frequents the place n is................ a Character
um. honestly the world’s our oyster. hmu n we cn brainstorm if none of tht catches ur eye!
#parkway.intro#abuse tw#death tw#drugs tw#hospitalisation tw#alcoholism tw#depression tw#i believe tht covers it...........#FLINGS this like a harpoon
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got a few more asks about bloodwater ballad, so i’m gonna consolidate them here! i’m gonna start doing it this way from now on instead of the screencap method to make it more accessible in general, too. accidentally did a small analysis on eric’s view of mary whoop!
anon: Oh I absolutely Adore bwb, I especially love the lines “perhaps I’m complicit, I fell asleep first / in the bloodcutting comfort of jaws” like the Imagery! This man loved his wretched wife so much! He trusted her enough to become sleep-vulnerable beside her and she betrayed this trust like a shark is bound to do (´༎ຶ ͜ʖ ༎ຶ `)💔
aaaaaaaah thank you! that was a fun line to come up with, yeah, ahhhh! here’s the thing, though - he says himself, he doesn’t even really consider it a betrayal. the thing about sharks is that their reputation is overblown and they’re made out to be more violent and ravenous than they Actually Are. they’re scavengers more often than not, just going and going and going because if they stop, then they’ll die.
and of course, they’re still dangerous - obviously - because like anything, they’re doing whatever they can to survive. and they happen to have very sharp teeth.
eric’s view of his wife is so... deeply toxic and skewed and unbalanced, while at the same time rooted in how completely plainly he saw her. she never lied, really. when she said that man she killed was her uncle asleep in the chair, she knew he knew it wasn’t true. she was telling the truth in her refusal to. (a concept i repeat in gerry’s narration in my fics, actually, applied to other characters. a concept he grew up with.) it was niceties to smooth a situation, saying it to say it, not because she expected him to believe it but because she knew he wouldn’t do anything about it.
and so eric doesn’t see this as a betrayal because he feels like this is just... How She Is. sharks aren’t betraying you by biting you, they’re just trying to see whether you’re what they need to survive and most of the time you’re gonna taste awful so they’ll give up. sometimes they’re desperate. sometimes they’re starving. most of the time, it’s just a force of nature and you don’t get a say in what happens.
he doesn’t view her as innocent, no. he knows this was not out of character for her at all, and just considers it to be in her nature. the PROBLEM is that he didn’t feel betrayed, because he just Knew she was like this and stayed with her anyway. that’s the moral dilemma there
she didn’t betray his trust as much as she met his expectations, even if perhaps it didn’t happen quite the way he imagined it would.
anon: since we're talkin' abt bloodwater ballad can i just say that i fucking love it and every day is a "listen to bloodwater ballad on repeat" day bc it's so beautifully constructed. and the lyrics are amazing and i keep finding cool little things abt them that link up with eric's story. "i fell asleep first in the bloodcutting comfort of jaws" is lakjlkdfj. "hands and feet bound to my heart" the SYMBOLISM. re-reading ur lyrics, i could dissect every line for the SYMBOLISM. it's just so amazing ;;;;
WAILS LOUDLY? i really honest to g-d cannot fathom the idea that anyone likes it enough to listen to it more than once like jfhbdnm i genuinely forget that i even wrote it and then someone will say something and it Smacks me and i just!!!! my heart is so big
PLEASE FEEL FREE TO DISSECT THE LINES AS YOU PLEASE that’s what i wrote them for that’s the purpose! i’m that pepe silvia board writer who packs everything i can into specific word choices, i love solving puzzles so i like building them for other people to solve, too. if you ever wanted to write it out or something you could make a lil draft and link me i’d love to see an interpretation that’s not my own it’d be super cool! no pressure if it was just an expression jhvbknm i’m just. the english major in me Ascends when i get to talk about this stuff
i’m really just glad you like it!!!! thank you ;-; !
anon: im listening to bloodwater ballad for the first time because of the people talking about it and... I'm crying thank you this is agonising
THANK YOU aaaahhhh, glad to have been of service >:’-) join me in hell i never stop crying about the delanos
EDIT: (note, also: i’m one of ron’s alters, hi. don’t mind my syntax.)
@v0idsign: so long as we’re talking abt bloodwater ballad i gotta toss in that i Regularly get it stuck in my head, i sing it in the shower and its one of a couple tunes that my brain defaults to when brain says its Humming Time. firesorrow good Also extremely good and on the listen on repeat/sing in shower list!!
tossing this in here for posterity, especially since it was a submission. this is real sweet of you, ron’s super happy to hear that. they do have good echolalia beats. tunes for autism by a guy who really likes to hum repetitive things, honestly.
EDIT 2: (hi i’m back hGJBKN)
anon: If we're complimenting bloodwater ballad, then I have to say your voice is beautiful. I'm not smart enough to really overanalyze the lyrics but I really like it. You wouldn't imagine how excited I was when I found out about firesorrow girl. I have been understanding of your fic which I forgot the name of, and I quite enjoy that too.
aaaaaaaa thank you so much ;; you’re so sweet! sometimes i get nervous about my voice because it’s really rusty lately since i don’t really take good care of it but it’s nice to be reassuredjhbkn and !!!! just cries on the floore
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have you ever watched an episode of the Emmy award winning sci-fi drama, The X Files? Maybe you’ve read my original post and yet you’re still wondering where the hell Fox Mulder got all those strands of hair on his jumbo gigantic head. I am back and here to help you find the answers to some of your burning questions; as we celebrate the hard work and triumphs of the hair and makeup department on the Fox Lot and team up with my big huge brain and my New York State Cosmetology license to give the people what they want once again: another top ten guide to Mulder’s fucking hair..
upon making this post a second time (rip 😔), I realized that just about every episode (yes, every. single. one. even the ones without Mulder and the latest season where he has to share headspace with [redacted]) has its own important and iconic hair looks... You may recognize that some of these are slightly repeated from the last post but that’s ok! What I'm here to do is enforce! So lets get started..
#10 s6:e21 Field Trip: Here again we begin our journey into cosmetic superstardom with a personal favorite of mine. Mulder rolling with the times by getting a haircut fresh off the FTF wave left our nation in fucking shambles. Can’t imagine going to see a major motion picture in theatres jam packed with Mulder’s most supreme hair looks only to come back to my tv screen to see it all gone away. For students reading this post for educational purposes, this caused a worldwide walkout on popular salon franchise Supercuts in the year 1998. However, a haircut didn’t necessarily mean Mulder forgot how to take care of his hair. The precision and placement as each strand of hair perfectly outlines his jumbo head is revolutionary and inspiring. Mushroom induced drug high? K. Lemme still grab my teasing comb and my hairspray and make sure I look presentable for when my partner walks into my apartment screaming abt “where's Mulder” and wanting “answers”. The answer is this: this look is about giving people like myself with big heads rights and looking fuckable while doing so. 10/10 for inspiring hope.
#9 s1:e9 Space: Imagine you’re a few episodes into a show, the core plot is developing right before your eyes and you’re beginning to get to know The X Files three main characters; Fox Mulder, Dana Scully, and Mulder Hair Strands #1-3. All is well except, you still have no clue how crucial, and critical Mulder Hair Strands 1-3 will become to the show and to your life and I am here to tell you that you are in for a very rude and bold awakening. This message goes out to all the haters and all the people who didn’t believe Mulder’s hair was valid prior to season 4. He is here to tell you he DID know how to use dry shampoo and even the occasional blow dry oil and you can suck a dick abt it. Bold of you to assume he wouldn’t pull the round brush and the biosilk out the drawer to impress a visit to fucking NASA. 10/10 for involving science.
#8 s4:e6 Sanguinarium: I sit here writing to you today as the song ‘Handmade Heaven’ comes on shuffle; strikingly fitting for this raw and ethereal image of straight up beauty and wonder and magic and heaven in hair. This special, freshly washed and air dried smells like strawberries and sandalwood and fuckability. The look reaches through your TV and wraps its hands around your neck and sucks the life right out of you. Are you gonna let it happen? You sure are. Lucky for you, I just so happened to be there when the angels hand sewed each strand of hair onto his head and here’s what they had to say about it: this is everything and more and the way Mulder has just washed his hair with fresh mountain water droplets hand collected like nothing else mattered. Put his clothes back on and went on his merry way. Can’t imagine being in Scully’s shoes ready to walk on in her partners room unannounced to go over serious case related matters and theories. Woulda went bonkers. This truly is a handmade heaven. Hand crafted by Mulder for Scully and for the good viewers of the globe. 10/10 for embracing me in its arms.
#7 s4:e3 Home: A look from one of primetime TV’s most notorious banned episodes. Viewer discretion IS advised not only for the horrifying and cringeworthy content displayed in this episode, but for also making it painfully blunt to the viewer that Mulder’s hair follicles are happier and healthier than anybody else's will ever be in their lifetime. In fact, I can feel my own hair falling out and being respawned onto HIS head as I type this and I’m sure you can too. The way the sun glistens off his golden brown strands makes me want to walk into oncoming traffic. You might also notice how effortless this look was, as it probably only took a quick run thru with his fingers, and Mulder’s passion and need to look sexy at any time of the day at all times. It’s obvious that this kind of thing comes naturally to him, which just comes off as insulting to men everywhere. 11/10 for striking fear into men’s hearts.
#6 s4:e20 Small Potatoes: Genuinely took every bone and nerve ending in my body to not put this look in the top 5 even though it so clearly deserves it. Here at mulderspice we believe in diversity, meaning it wouldn’t be right to make my top five greatest hairstyles ever produced on The X Files just of Mulder’s iconic and revolutionizing middle part (though really who is stopping me..). This screenshot in general has me up in arms at how perfectly the blue background matches his eyes, and how it accentuates his hydrated skin and lips. But you’re not here for that. It’s the hair particularly that really pulls the shot together, as Mulder took the time that morning to spray it with some tinted dry shampoo that most defiantly and absolutely smells like chocolate. This look feels like a warm hug on a frigid winter day. I feel EMBRACED and I feel CARED FOR thanks to the wonderful staff and team @ Mulder’s head and hair follicles. What the fuck could be better than this. 16/10 for making me feel some type of way.
#5 s4:e8 Tunguska: Currently you may not think anything of Krycek to the left of this image though ill have you know he plays an extremely vital part of this look and all the words I’m about to speak to you directly. So listen up: Krycek may have heroically slayed Mulder’s father in cold blooded and justifiable murder, but we thank him for this, as it caused Mulder to lash out in the best way possible: through looks. “Un-shun: Krycek do you think I’m good to bring my Redkin Rewind 6 styling paste with me or will the Russian TSA think of that as contraband? :Re-shun”. A sweaty, manly and highly illegal treck through a Russian testing facility and a stint in a violent foreign PRISON surely was not going to stop Mulder from keeping his hair properly hydrated, styled and parted. That’ll really ruffle Krycek’s feathers and make him feel sorry for what he did…. The sexiest way to avenge the death of your deadbeat father. 24/10 for you know why.
#4 s1:e6 Shadows: In the year 1993, Mulder steps onto the scene, young, fresh faced, bright eyed and ready to give men around the globe what they (so desperately) needed: the encouragement to care about their hair. Any backstreet boy you may know have this scene to thank directly, as this is what encouraged them to reproduce Mulder’s hair onto their own heads time and time again. What I would give to see with my own eyes Mulder length times width times height his head to equal this perfectly proportionate look of volume and sexy. And who can I write a warrant out to for allowing this shot to take place. Oh to be the various and expensive hair care products in Mulder’s bathroom …… 899/10 for starting a movement (-1 for making us do equations).
#3: s1:e10 Fallen Angel: The biggest regret I’ve ever had in my short little life was not adding this moment to the last post. And tumblr deleted it in order to give me this opportunity to present this to you today. By the way, that absolutely is in fact a choir of angels singing as you view this image. Go ahead and try to think of something on this earth that could be better than this tossled bed headed im-stressed-becos-my-partner-of-2-weeks-isn’t-seeing-the-big-picture-about-how-we’re-all-key-pawns-in-an-ongoing-government-conspiracy hairstyle hand crafted by Mulder all while holding his head in his hands hard at work trying to break through to the truth. Scully [insert photo of Scully with her eyes popping out of her head here] and I both wanna rip our own hair out and throw it in the garbage. 2000/10 for making our hearts ache..
#2: s4:e10 Paper Hearts: Behold- the image I’m slamming down on the desk at full force when I finally get myself a therapist. I need a licensed professional doctor to help me understand the various angles that this purposeful shot affects my life health and well being. In a paranoia induced out of body experience Mulder took his pinky finger and parted his hair down the middle, took a protractor to perfectly round the tendrils falling ever so gracefully on his forehead and ran out of his apartment and through the woods of DC. Doesn’t matter if he’s crazy? Doesn’t matter if its fuck all 4am? Who knows if the discoveries of this night is finally going to answer the heartbreaking questions regarding Mulder’s baby sister? Fuck it we’re just gonna make sure Scully has something to look forward to after being awoken yet again in the middle of the night and asked to come wrangle and control this stupid idiot. This just makes me unhinged. 50000/10 for waking up in the middle of the night and doing the most for us all.
#1 s4:e3 Teliko: This one will remain number one for as long as I shall live. I’ve dedicated my life to this cause and I’m ready to make you painfully aware of it. Grab a pen and paper and get ready to do some heavy math with me because this look right in front of your eyes is the equation to happiness and sexiness. Can barely find the words to describe to you how this picture makes me feel. Each strand of hair is personally reaching down and wrapping his head in one big giant hug of protection and solitude. Unbelievable that Scully didn’t head back to her hotel room and scream at the top of her lungs right after this. There’s no way she went about her day as normal without wanting to kick the shit out of him and then put him back together with soft feathery kisses. What you are witnessing here is the very turning point of the show where Scully looked into into the very center point of that part and said “guess I have no choice but to fall in love with him 🚶🏽♂️”. Chris Carter’s idealistic version of Mulder and the one we actually ended ups seeing as viewers were so drastically different that it’s blatantly clear that he had absolutely no idea the cultural implications that were about to rock the world to its core and tip it on its axis when David Duchovny showed up on set looking like this. I could write a thesis about this. I could conduct research and studies about this. I got kicked out of college because I cared more about this than I did actual schoolwork. I feel like I’m in a very sexy chokehold. Wish I could live forever in one little square pixel of this image. Nothing means more to me than this. 1000000/10 no further comments.
and the honorable mentions go to....
s8:e16 Three Words: Dead? Did you die? Did you die and miraculously defy god by rising from the dead and coming back to life? Just got home from the morgue? Think nothing is the same? Left guessing if you’re a soon to be 5 minute father? Did you just fucking die? He’s lost his family and his job and the world just went on without him like it was nobody’s business. Walked out of the morgue right to his apartment and what did he have left? His expensive array of hair styling and finishing products that’s what the fuck he had left. Being an all around reject from society didn’t at all stop him from taking his fingers and dipping it into that Big Sexy styling pomade and fluffing his head to high heavens. As a personal fuck you to god and to John Doggett too. He’ll never let you know the emotional hellstorm going on in his life in that moment but he WILL make it known to you that despite being 8 feet under ground for 6 months he’ll never give up on his hair. For the PEOPLE. Try and go through the nightmare of death and then rejected fatherhood and see if you come out of it with any hair at ALL. An itty bitty glimpse into what would have been Untitled Mulder Abduction Story (2001)....
I Want To Believe (2008): Here you will see the sluttiest moment in major motion picture history. Shh im not using this opportunity to show you this screenshot for the 800th time I’m trying to keep you educated. BREAKING NEWS; Man hiding in home office for 6 years fully off the grid has FULL head of hair and is getting regular sex *not clickbait*. So what if Mulder has gone fully unhinged and off the walls bonkers he’s also gone FULL slut and it shows in that sexy thick voluminous head of slut hair. If you ever for a second thought prior to seeing this movie for the first time that Mulder would show up a full on son-less wreck and a half think the fuck again babes. He’s managed to hold on to every single little strand ever grown on his head even well into his middle aged madness and its about time we give him the credit he deserves. (PS. Please know I wrote this entire spiel without even viewing the shot shown here. Its just permanently etched on the inside of my forehead so its there when my eyes roll back into my head.) For this we say…..; Whore rights.
s11:e3 Plus One: Incase you were unaware, I have been going through a very slow and painful process of erasing Season 11 from my brain completely. Its been a long road but its achievable and the end result will save me from a lot of future heartache and trauma. This however, is a moment I will cherish forever and though you may think its for the hot sex (which is like maybe 30% the case) its actually because it puts together everything I’ve ever loved and believed about the show in only a few thousand pixels. How old is Mulder here? 30? 31? Still has hair and still has an unbelievable amount of love to shower Scully in for as long as they both shall live (which lets face it, she deserves one million times over.) What this has taught me was to hang up my “Mulder deserved…” hat for good and just be thankful for what I’ve got. I ended up with no son or happy dreamy ending where Mulder gets to die with a family he’s never had in his life, but here we are left with the little things.. Like Mulder and Scully’s unconditional love and most importantly .. The hair on Mulder’s head. Its called growth and acceptance and I am learning it. Also I just wanted to show you what it would look like if you were like 57 and sexy and still had all ur hair. That’s it :-)
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For the sleepover ask (and you've probably talked abt this for the 100th time, sorry): What was your first impression of Death Note and how has that impression changed over time? And what was it that made this show 'stick' with you? :3
Ohh that's a good question, thanks for indulging me @trueffelmaiden!
I discovered Death Note way back in like 2007 I think, and it was an extremely random way to find it. I think I just came across an AMV on YouTube or whatever and thought that L looked strangely compelling and liked his energy, so I wanted to know more about his character. I found the anime on a site online and then IMMEDIATELY had L's death spoiled for me by a commenter on the first episode that said he dies in episode 25 ;__; . I had never really seen any anime except for a few episodes of Pokemon and such when I was a kid, so I didn't realize it could be so good! I binge watched the entire thing within about 2 days alone in my room and then couldn't get over the show. I was fascinated and haunted by the characters and the unique world-building and all the possibilities that might have been with little changes to circumstances and everything like that. Nobody else I knew was as obsessed with it as I was either, so I ended up reading a lot of fanfic and leaving rambling comments on the ones I really liked. I hadn't ever been involved in a fandom before either, but I met someone very smart and kind on ff.net ("serria" is the username, you can still find her fic on there now) who taught me a ton about the series and how fandom culture works and everything like that! She was much more involved in it than I was, she had actually read the entire manga and participated a lot in writing thoughtful meta and such on LiveJournal (no Tumblr or AO3 or whatever back then). I attribute her kindness and encouragement toward me back then as the reason I ever felt comfortable participating in the fandom myself, and the reason I have a blog here now!
I was into DN from about 2007 to 2009, then got busy with life stuff for a long while and drifted away from it. I got back into DN in my twenties around 2016 I think? This time I actually read the whole manga, and then I watched the English dub of the anime for the first time too (which wasn't even available to me anywhere back when I was into DN for the first time). I was amazed at how well it held up and how good the entire manga was, better than the anime imo.
Soooo after that long-winded explanation here are the main things I remember about how my impressions changed or didn't change:
-I didn't fully appreciate how beautifully drawn and funny in a dark way the manga was back in the late 2000s, and didn't bother reading the whole thing after L's death, because I figured since I'd already seen the anime I already knew what happened. In a plot sense this is baaaasically true, but I now see that the anime altered the successor arc a lot and made quite a few of the characters from that half of the story more wooden and less interesting and comprehensible than they were in the manga. I was especially surprised by how much I liked Near's character in the manga, because I thought he was boring and unsympathetic in the anime, but he was actually one of my favourites in the manga when I read it all the way through. I also think I liked Mello a bit less this time around because he just came off very violent and repetitive to me in most of the things that he does, and I always sympathize with the characters he is traumatizing more than I sympathize with him (though he's definitely a very cool looking character and I love his design).
-Back in the day my impression of L was based totally on how he came off to me in the Japanese dub of the anime, and I definitely saw him as well-meaning and gentle and a bit naive as well. I remember Serria telling me that she thought he was cruel and I was like ??? Stuff like how he confined the Kira suspects never occurred to me as being shady and I always felt sorry for him because of how Light killed him. Oh yeah and I also hated Light, though I cried a lot when he died. It wasn't until I read some good fanfics that I started appreciating Light's character more and seeing how L was perhaps a bit shadier than I first believed him to be. Back then I was less of a critical thinker and also a bit naive, always assuming people have good intentions deep down no matter what. I also think the anime version of L somewhat alters his character and makes it a bit harder to know how you're supposed to be interpreting him and his actions. I definitely prefer the manga now for everything including L's characterization and dynamic with Light and everything else.
-I finally fully saw what an excellent character Light is when I revisited the series as an adult. I have read a lot more and watched a lot more and learned a lot more about good writing over the last decade so I have a much better appreciation for when a character and a plot are really well done. I think he is the absolute best part of the entire story now and that it wouldn't work at all without his character as the center of everything, he's the whole reason the story is a classic and so interesting and fun to watch or read.
-I think I was also a bit taken aback by how strongly I still got Lawlight vibes when I revisited the story again as an adult. I didn't care about shipping them anymore and set out to just read the story exactly as it was, because I assumed I had just been projecting a lot of wishful thinking onto things back in the day. But the whole time I read and watched it again I was still like... 👀 jeez hahah they're really hitting it off. I think I used to always see it as L being obsessed with Light and Light hating L back in the day, but this time I saw it more as Light being obsessed with L. The way he continues to think about him and compare everyone else to him years after he is gone is the shippiest thing about them to me now. I enjoy the series for way more reasons than just that, and I do think the fandom kinda goes overboard on this ship sometimes in ways that aren't very interesting to me, but their strange chemistry is definitely the heart of the story to me, and that's something that hasn't changed over time.
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