#they had the bird for like a week too
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i want to blow up my coworkers BRAIN
#personal#they are so fucking annoying and can never not have the convo related to them#like one somebody was asking about my hair which relates to my dad#so i’m like yeah cut and dyed it to keep up with my dads care haha#and then they were talking about my last colors brown and red and this coworker who has red got brought in#and then they go into LENGTH about how they needed to bleach their hair after their birds death#they had the bird for like a week too#and then the death of a different pet and was just laying into it during a meeting#which should piss me off more like oh ur gonna steer a conversation about my dads health to ur fucking pets. kys#then rn i got an agressive called and got called a little shit and was going over it with my boss#and was explaining something and said if it’s looks off that might be me i mix up letters sometimes#and this fucker just CHIMES in like dyslexia is bitch! and so is the one for math or whatever the name is#and it’s like one wasn’t even talking to you two separate thing all together three#i’m not diagnosed with dyslexia but let’s say i have it stop fucking telling people other peoples disabilities#like they have done this MUTIPLE times just casually bringing up my autism or other shit and it’s like???? can i help you#stop mentioning this at my fucking work place#like i get ur disabilities are like cool trading cards and shit but any that i do happen to have are real facets of my life that maybe!#i don’t want shared at work!#and even that i could forgive but worst all#this coworker is so annoying. and cringe. walking 2013 mental health post on tumblr#they used to ask me for rides home too without even knowing me and i did it like twice before i had to cut that shit bc they just#started expecting it#anyway i hate them and i have to hear about their sister tried to kill them one more fucking weekend i’m getting touch with said sister to#finish the dam job
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we sang in the aeroplane over the sea tgth ☆
#27% circle line with a lovely friend of mine rail tracks screeching etc etc u know the usual. im just gonna write down memories#a few weeks ago my friend read thus spoke zarathustra by the fire to the music she was dancing it was her silhouette#against the flashlight lit up gold and royal blues and tiger's silk i tried not to fall in love with her. in bordeaux we searched#for pomegranates he sent her 300 quid by the beach she cut it open with a knife her hand covered in red we each had a taste of her work#sweet red wet the sweetest grit. too barely clothed to go into the cliffside church they painted my eyes we painted hers#8 shots of gin she screamed joyfully IT'S ALIVE! at the book she said become the child i said i feel like a monster she said i was insane#i tried to believe her. fortified wine and later a red pen crossword defiled by humidity her hair in my hands two king sized beds#pushed next to each other she took her top off she told us to watch her arms raised up the musculature on her back was precise cut from#marble we saw oceans we saw the birds take cold baths the midnight sun over a wasp-infested pool our chemicals in their bodies#gold flakes dark skin gold cross shoulders against mine drawing some form of each other on the train i didn't hesitate#to say her eyes were beautiful over and over monks at the soapshop with titanium credit cards i loved you like i loved no other#he tied his hair up and walked us into the river he held a bullet between his lips i never held his hand he said what an honour#you own too much capital your mother thinks i'm a natural i realised i haven't told my mother i loved her in years she's always been mother#never mom i'll watch you watch seaweeds this is terminal akrasia i'll feel your fingers smear perfume on my lips your girlfriend grins#bite into the straw take the shot hold my hand get it all wrong draw in the sand kiss him right stab through leather shower in chlorine#you're the determinable vicissitude is all yours we won the Game AND the Battle AND the War i'm proud of you like crazy we feed each other#saffron cliffside lovers well-fallen brothers fat cats blue windows southwest sun ALife SynBio design aXAA grow us a city in silico#we've grown to the ends of glee fire-jumper ocean-eater sure-footed lists on lists hands on eyelids не устану искать тебя#...anyway ive put my face on this blog b4 but hiii again#feel free to rb btw the rants r not personal
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IWTV S2E6 "Like the light god made before he made the world" livethoughts. Spoilers and thoughts as always below the cut
#also its so crazy how this is the most like manic/mean weve seen louis#like now i belive Florence and the knocking down a peg#i think its bv he doesnt have the veneer of dreamstat to keep them thoughts in his head. thoughts fluttering like birds#out of many one voice type shit#i need nothing bad to happen to claudia and ha white girl#rewrite the whoel series dig up anne rice Frankenstein her and fix it just please please please let em go#they aint even bother nobody they aint even in the coven no more!!!!!!!!!! leave em be!!!!!!!#i will say the coven had that shit planned out like they was dropping rico charges#interview with the vampire#iwtv spoilers#iwtv#amc iwtv#interview with the vampire spoilers#iwtv s2#iwtv season 2#i have many thoughts but ill prolly post more later#im going to Bonnaroo so it may be laterer#also imma try and update plan b this week. its been too long#yall fenna get some good food
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🥀💌🕯️💀 <33
*old person yells at cloud* THEORY TIME <3 but i was thinking of the skill trees screens we’ve seen so far and i am like…… super certain that ingellvar is the mourners surname and soo that calls for an update to irulannes pin interest board <33
(ill cry change it if it isn’t though but hehe anyway im stoked to at last have a surname for when i save her edits bc rn her folder says i.datv xixjjxhx *WHEEZE* 💀)
#leg.txt#it fits so well it fits so welllll irulanne ingellvar you’ll always be loved by MEEE#the icon looks suuuper like some of the dead in the necropolis in one of the concept arts so i am thinking its them??#thinking about her story a lot lately I NEED TO WRITE IT DOWN SOO BAD 🥀🤧#im thinking she was found by the sisters raised up right adopted a surname (mayb from a mentor or ‘mother’ of sorts??)#raised up as she was to be arcane advisor/mistress mother to a mage heir bc they want a mage on a throne one way or another or both etc etc#like i mean that could make sense for her i think?? its not TECHNICALLY her name yk iru didn’t actually have a first name either#its what they gave her? AT LEAST THATS WHAT SHE WAS TOLD bc hehe the blood magic in the ritual#did a wee more than just what’s happening now from what happened in the trailer hehe#it also lifted a wee little spell they did on her that wiped all of her memories from before she met the sisters 🥀👁️#there may be some vengeance from robbing her of her life she may drag her lovie l*ucanis on who’s to say HEHE#something something she had her own kingdom already as she was a sort of spymaster w/ the dead using deceased birds to watch for hot gossip#a prodigy at a young age she was <3 she may have been an advisor anyway even without the sisters influence yk#ughh i want to develop the sisters and irulannes pre v*eilguard lore soooo bad now EEEK.#i am getting my wisdom teeth out next week so i think it’ll be the prime time to do that i think 🥀💌#anyway time to finish those asks ughh they’re the funnest as always if you read all of this moots i am baking you cookies <3#i think word is that thorne is the wardens and it does look like it i would say too?#i think for cassia she had to have got that from someone maybe to hide her identity or something#she’s either the result of a princess of the a*nderfels having a tryst with n*athaniel or l*oghain i haven’t decided 🥀👁️
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Today I went out on the ocean and saw puffins. They're so neat!
Also learned that indeed I am prone to motion sickness.
10/10 wouldn't do it again
#i even took Dramamine#but not before getting on the boat#also my recurrent inability to tell the difference between hunger and nausea didn't help#I thought I was just hungry for like a full half hour before I realized that actually I was feeling unwell and it was the motion causing it#what is it with bodies#finally those ginger chews I had to buy at the Asian grocery store to bring my purchase of edible alkali up to the $5 minimum#so glad they had those at the counter as the thing to grab#because I do like to keep them handy but this was the first time I had needed to use them since that day a couple weeks ago#me!#gpoy#oh but anyway the puffins were neat#also saw other neat birds#birding#my life list is now longer by at least two species#buddy went to Ecuador earlier thia month and his is up by 300+#but it's not a competition#seals and an otter too!
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Song of the Day: May 3
"Life Less Frightening" by Rise Against
#song of the day#'I don't ask for much / truth be told I'd settle / for a life less frightening'#another song that when I sing it alone it doesn't sound much like the original but I do so like to sing it#check me stirring my roux humming 'these lives we live test negative for happiness' sweetly to myself#today was Friday and I'm still trying to decide if I'm satisfied with the amount of work I got done this week#I suppose I'll have to be#I had my weekly report meeting and again the updates my boss asked for in the meeting were not the ones she asked me to prepare#so I split-screened her and delivered the prepared updates as I frantically opened and updated the new request#and then when she finished making politely falsely interested sounds (I'm not bitter I'm not I'm not) she asked again for the new update#and by then I had it ready! saved it as I brought up the share-screen and showed it to her#too frustrated in the moment to be properly proud of myself but now it's hours later and I'm feeling a little smug about it#little back-pats for me#I have something like a project timeline worked out for the idiot project#and I did some good work in the garden (nasturtium growing up the post under the bird feeder. very pleased it took the transplant so well)#and I sooooort of sorted the freezer stuff. kind of. mostly we ate the things I wanted to rearrange but I've got a plan for moving forward#the last non-work thing I'd really wanted to accomplish this week was getting my queue set up again here#I've gone through my drafts and done some prep but as you can see the queue isn't actually running again yet#hopefully I'll do that tomorrow. we'll see how it goes#the queue may have to wait until Sunday because I must confess if I can accomplish only one single solitary thing tomorrow#I would like it to be six hours of uninterrupted sleep. may it please the gods I shall rest tomorrow. blessed weekend#edit: wait wait I'm a fool I'm a fool I just typed 'May 3' and still I am a fool#it's May the Fourth!!#happy star wars day my loves if I don't get the queue up today after all#it's because I'm reshuffling everything because I've got a new influx of SW posts to distribute!!
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My heart is soooo full of love guys
#I think sunlight is a drug#I feel like a new person#maybe it’s just a mindset shift idk#but I’m doing art again too!!!! it’s been SO long since I’ve done art on my own#and like actually attempted a project#and then improv was so fucking fun today#stilll thinking about Brophy’s character. he was just a lil caterpillar. he deserved better#and then Liz played an alcoholic mom who was AWFUL to her kid#and we were just silly and goofy and had a great lil time with this teacher#I love all my friends so much#they’re incredibly funny. honored that they let me play with them#I just have such a good life and I gotta remember that!!! for the winter#maybe. maybe I’m just Fixed and it’s not just that the sun is out#I have also been on a really really weird sleep schedule so maybe that’s part of it#but I feel like I’ve been waxing poetic about the clouds for like a week before my sleep schedule got changed#anyways#go outside and look at how pretty the sky is!!! and the trees and the birds!!! so many little birds#and also the people. all my friends are beautiful and lovely and I’m so glad they’re in my life#I even talked to coworkers I hate today#and I was polite and made conversation#(not with Karl. let’s not get too crazy here. he can go die)#but even fucking ******#I was nice to her even tho I dislike her#cause she’s just a person!! we’re all just people guys#except Karl. Karl can go fuck himself.#damn even my good mood can’t make me excuse him as a human being that’s wild#ANYWAYS all this rambling to say life is soooo good#things are gonna be ok. and even when they’re not we’ll get through ittt
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Putting on last year's trans rigs stream from Drawfee before i have to get ready to go out with my mum and her bf today (bc i have the worst feeling in my gut he's gonna make that An Thing for me if given the chance today, aka whenever i eventually need the restroom while we're at Mystic)
#text post#Housemate was amazing and helped me calm down a bit before ae went to work bc my brain woke up in meltdown mode over this tbh#it sucks bc like. im excited to see my mum despite the Everything with that lmao#but im not excited for how her bf has been acting since they got here (and it's been day 1 out of 7 days)#with some outright homophobic comments while Housemate and i hosted them briefly at our house yesterday afternoon#not abt us but like. i mean. u know we're both queer so#doesn't really matter if it's abt us or not it's still fucky and makes me worry abt how he's gonna be today!!#doesn't help that he really wanted to go to Italy with her instead this summer#(despite the passive aggressive complaints from him & mum to a degree abt how expensive it was for them to come out here)#(we're ignoring the fact that a European trip would be even more expensive lmao tho i do think if they want to/can afford it they should go)#like. the Vibe from him has just been that he'll be Just Polite Enough but that he didn't want to be here#and he doesn't expect to have any fun and it's like#dude i am Trying. i and Housemate have looked up stuff to do that includes things he likes (like guns and historical weapons)#we tried making comments abt that yesterday like hey u might like this but if there's anything u have in mind already#and he was just. whatever idc but then made comments that made it clear he's not excited for anything else#like museums or the beach for sea glass hunting or the bird sanctuary or even the zoo#and all have places to rest/sit plus restrooms and food so I don't think it's a worry abt facilities thing for him#i think he's just fed up that I'm still involved in my mum's life since i moved and like#yes there's a detangling of the umbilical cord i and my past therapist were trying to eventually get my mum to cut#since cutting it myself in any attempt has had her metaphorically taping it back together#but like. it's not entirely on me here. I'm trying to set boundaries and make sure she's giving him more attention than me since he's w/her#more than i am now#i know he's upset when she helps me financially too (i offer to pay her back but she always refuses it) bc she took me aside yesterday#to give me some cash for the time with them for souvenirs/fun stuff i might not buy otherwise bc im trying to be mindful of money#aka still waiting on money my fkn job should have already paid me like. a week or more ago now#he makes her happy so even if he hates me i still care abt his frustrating ass#and i do want him to have as much fun as he can while still relaxing during the trip out here#but i feel like im gonna have to physically shake him by the shoulders screaming this before he listens#and even if he listens he probably won't believe me#sorry for the tag essay the edible hasn't kicked in yet can u guys tell lmao
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Can’t wait for my drivers license to arrive so I can be driving legally again for the first time in 1.5 years!
#for legal reasons this is a joke#SO THIS IS WHATS UP#as a youngin#a young adult one might say#I was starting to learn that some systems are bullshit when I’d previously been a pretty big rule-follower#my mom showing me how to navigate the healthcare system a bit/showing me how student loans legit have practices to confuse and fuck us over#also im really bad at getting things in on time (this is an important fact)#so when I see that my drivers license is abt to expire. I’m like ‘Oup gotta get that done!’ then promptly forget abt it#next time I remember it’s 3 months expired.#I check the date and realize that wait! in a year imma be turning 21 and just one yr after that Real ID’s will become mandatory (im p sure)#so I decide to push off renewing my license! I think that the whole process will b annoying asf bc I’ve only dealt with the DMV in-person#and it SUCKED and took forever. I’m thinking that if I renew my drivers license right on/after my 21st birthday I can knock out two birds#with one stone: I can get it as a Real ID and I can get an updated picture that’s flipped sideways so getting age-checked is faster#little do i know: it’s v much illegal to be driving around with an expired license!#I drive around for a year (over a year? I don’t remember when I first realized it was expired) j having fun#then one month b4 my 21st birthday I get into an abroad study thing and have to get my passport. which I realize is also expired. and#realize that to renew my passport I have to have a valid drivers license. At this point I also realize how fucked I could be if I get pulled#over with my expired license. so I check out the process for DL renewal and rejoice! it’s online!#AND THANK FUCK I CHECKED THEN. bc if I had waited LITERALLY two more days I would not have been able to renew online and would’ve had to go#in-person. and there were no in-person appointments until after my 21st. and I learned in this process abt the fines my state applies when u#renew a DL late and ALSO that u have to entirely retake the test/redo all the paperwork shit if it’s expired for too long. I would’ve had to#retake the test n everything if I’d gone past my bday. I was also in another state for college. idk how incoherent these ramblings are but#basically I would’ve been Ultra Fucked. anyways! got that figured out#renewed the DL and had it sent to my home. then da house floods and crime goes up in the neighborhood and my DL ends up either being lost#Or tossed (with other flood-damaged things) or stolen.#I don’t realize this for 4 months bc I am silly. also in college out-of-state. also other reasons.#finally got around to calling DMV and telling them that my DL never arrived… 6 months after I renewed it!#and they were v sweet and are resending me my DL for free. so in the next few weeks I shall finally b driving legally again#!!!! the end#mypost
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Holy fuck I'm so tired
#after work i had to go to a friends graduation party. i am dead on my feet#my whole week is busy trying to cram in hangout days with friends too#cuz everyone is like. leaving for vacations and they wanna hang out b4 they go#but that means back to back to back and i am Not Built Like That#but i cant say No because i do wanna actually see them and i wont see them in a long time :(#this bird speaks#but for now eepy....#if im inactive thats why
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Bonus from yesterday’s birbs
I have a caffeine problem, Aziraphale does not :D
Crowley wants to sleep
#aziraphale can’t handle it lmao#ineffable birds#art#my art#good omens#bird omens#birds#pencil#crowley#ineffable husbands#aziraphale#colored pencil#good omens art#ok look I don’t have a tan colored pencil in my set I’m trying my best with Aziraphale ToT#anyway when I was in Italy a few weeks ago I had espresso like every day#it was genuinely awesome#also a local place sells double shots for like $2.50 and it’s pretty good too#may or may not have a redbull next to me finishing drawing this lmao
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Came home to find an injured crow in the back yard. Poor thing had a broken wing. Pretty young bird, according to the wildlife vet I left it with. It ended up hopping under the one part of the fence that's open and my neighbors wouldn't answer their door (they were home), so I ended up hopping their fence and having their dog help me corral the bird. I feel sorry for having to traumatize it to collect the stupid thing, but the vet should be able to help it recover and they said it appears to be in good shape minus the wing, and they said they'll release it back into the area I'm in if it recovers so it can go back to its family.
#crow#corvid#corvus#bird#injured animal#wildlife#wildlife rehabilitation#they're gonna call me in a week or so to let me know how the bird is. hoping it'll make a full recovery.#said on a preliminary look over it seems like it ran into something and dazed itself after it hit the ground#they said it's a fairly yoing bird and it might have gotten cocky and flew too close to a tree or got caught stealing from other birds#i offered the crow water and blueberries but it just stared at me like it was waiting for me to kill it already#and it got a little car ride. i tried to be as gentle as i could but the roads are so bad out here that i know it had to have been uncomfy#the receptionist was commenting on how polite the bird was. said someone brought a crow in last week that tried to kill everyone
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you understand me. you get it. creator might be having a fuckshit time but at least you can be a creature! but i’m also imagining… imagine just hanging out with your favorite characters as some kind of little animal bc sure they’d kill you if they knew you were the person they’re hunting down but pets and scritches are so nice…… worth risking your life for? yes. god yes. absolutely.
is this days late? yeag. i’ve been busy doing Things and god there are so many things to be done - teddy anon
i thought your last ask abt this was like two-three days ago but…. no…. i posted it ystderay…. huh-?
anyway you’re still so right. be a snowfox and hang out a albedo in his lab. shift into a cat and stick around the angels share. diluc let’s you stay. be a bird and fuck w the wanderer. just stay away from the narukami shrine.
like i…. if it was some sort of defense mechanism or like something you fell back on when injured…. razor following the sound of whimpering to you, an injured wolf pup, your form small in your weakened state. you can’t convince me zhongli wouldn’t help a bird with a hurt leg. beidou checks w the crew before saying yeah, kazuha can bring his friend of a stray onboard, since cats always land on their feet don’t they?
oh, and good luck on your Things!
#m1d : [chats]#m1d : [secrets]#teddy anon#oh to be a creature…… laying in my beloveds arms……….. ugh#translation it’s been way too goddamn long since you’ve had any sort of positive contact with another#if in your fear you bite at zhongli’s hand nobody can blame you; not even himself. he just picks you up gently#he wonders why he’s so insistent on helping a bird that doesn’t want to be helped but when he’s got you reasonably patched up and you trust#him a bit more he’s glad he did. being a god can get lonely and the fact that you willingly stay with him despite your unclipped wings…#or maybe ventis not allergic to you—because you’re not really a cat—and begs diluc to let him keep you because he’s never actually pet a cat#before and holy shit cat’s fur is so soft come on diluc pleaseeee?#he agrees with a sigh—he’s sad to see you go—and venti immediately takes you to whatever apartment he has that he doesn’t use#yeah he doesn’t have proper cat food or enrichment toys but it’s fineeeee he’ll figure it out (he won’t)#you end up eating cooked fish for like the next two and a half weeks while he convinces diona yes he actually does have a cat and yes he#genuinely does want the best for said cat so please just believe him and tell him what he needs to get. he’s so confused. what’s catnip.#oh to be a creature……. laying in the arms of my beloved….
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hugging you hugging you hugging you
Thankyou, it's been a pretty rough day, after a difficult couple of weeks 🧡🧡🧡
#mum took me op shopping after#which while not great for me physically because I'm still pretty unwell was fun#and a much needed distraction#found a bday gift of 2 little quartz birds for a friend who likes rocks#then her grandma dropped in when we got home and we showed her#and she told us my friend saw them last week and wanted them but said they were too expensive#they'd just dropped the price before we got there and they told us the birds had been viewed by a bunch of people that day#but no one bought them#so I felt like that was God's timing#and earlier Furby the kitten climbed up on my chest to purr like a train which was nice#and then starting biting me which was less nice but expected lol#so I'm feeling more grounded and less upset now
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closing out my final workshop in my MFA by writing about a flop boyband
#classic tbh#jk it’s about how sometimes beauty is a defense mechanism and sometimes if you are a very public figure it’s a necessary one#squawk tag#hi i have had SUCH a busy week im so so so so tired rn#the first thing I shared for workshop was about a girl realising she didn’t care when her fiancé cheated on her so she just like#went on a very long drive and ended up back at her mothers home#but really it was about the nature of pain and how eventually pain becomes /boring/ if you live with it every day#one of my fave things I’ve ever written tbh#and now this one is too :>#glad for that#exhausted too#and yet …. the wheel turns#feeling introspective tonight <4#if you’re reading this I hope your week was lovely and I hope you see a cool bird tomorrow#flying or nesting. your choice <3
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Ok here’s my amateur birding collection
Two downy woodpeckers, you can’t see in the image but the one on the left is a male
Male and female northern cardinals
geese and mallard, not very interesting BUT a lot of the geese I saw were tagged which is cool because Ik the last time they did it around here was with helicopter lol (population doesn’t migrate)
black-capped chickadees and the invasive house sparrow.. there’s actually 3 house sparrows living in the little tree outside our window because it’s the only evergreen on the road. I think there’s chickadees too but. They’re TINY so it’s hard to see
Obviously also saw 10 billion robins
#like I’m good at identifying them because I had to learn for class but actually viewing them in non taxidermy forms is a struggle#long post#anyway… it’s FINALLY getting warm so hopefully . yeah#oh yeah there’s loads of red tailed hawks around here buttt I never get a good picture#lots of mourning doves too everytime I go on a walk I see minimum 15#also there’s LOTS of grebes and mergansers around here and I just moved here so I’ve never seen a lot of the types they have and like …#so yeah hopefully will try and see some this week#this is just birds but also seen eastern cottontails skunks raccoons whatever
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