#they demonized john wayyyy too much though

[borgialucrezia]

crazy how a subset of fans have invented an image of john winchester as a selfish man who never cared for anyone but himself as if he didn't make a deal with azazel (the demon who killed mary and spent the rest of his life chasing) and sacrificed himself to save dean's life...like it's such a heavy misconception and it's mostly them projecting their own experiences with their shitty dads onto the character and ignoring his on screen portrayal. he gets too much heat and they act like he's a raging monster because of the current trend of pathologizing complex characters.

[incesthemes]

hi, ciel! happy (late) wincest wednesday! :)

if you could have any two versions of sam and dean meet (e.g., s15!dean & boykingofhell!sam, etc.), which pairing do you think would get along best, and which do you think would get along worst? would any of them hate, love, or fear each other? which ones? hope your day is going well! <3

-lizzy

happy wincest wednesday!! sorry i'm late as well 🥴 i got wayyyy too absorbed in my book this past week.

this is such an interesting question!!! if i had to say, maybe late season 2 dean and season 10 sam might get along the best; their goals and desires regarding their relationship match up really well, and their levels of endless devotion to each other are nearly identical. they'd probably be able to live out some semblance of domestic bliss together, especially with sam no longer being under azazel's thumb. destiny successfully averted.

for getting along the worst, i think stanford era sam would really not mesh well with season 8/9 dean. dean operates on a fundamental, mutual understanding that they are each other's most important person and he's willing to push past any kind of boundary to ensure sam's safety and presence in his life. meanwhile, stanford era sam bears a grudge and a fierce, spiteful independence which is only sated by dean's willingness to let go. early seasons wincest only ever works because dean lets go of sam in the first place, so if sam meets a version of dean who is no longer willing to do that, then that development toward each other would probably never happen, or would happen only through arduous pains and so, so much conflict.

i'm not sure if there is a version of sam and dean who could ever truly hate each other, but the closest they could get is probably late seasons dean and stanford sam 🤔 but hate?? idk, in my humble opinion they're way too blinded by the soulmatism to ever hate each other.

this isn't exactly love per se (of course, all versions of sam love all versions of dean, and vice versa), but as is the popular opinion, demon dean and bloodfreak sam would match each other's freak way way way too much. ruby who??? no this is my brother and he makes me stronger with his devil blood. christ almighty.

maybe this one comes off as a stretch, but i think season 5 sam would fear vampire dean (probably not the other way around, but maybe there's guilt there instead). i think sam would see himself in dean's bloodlust, in a way that strikes too hard at something too fresh in his mind. he would look at dean and see reflected the version of him that dean watched helplessly for a year—and what's worse is that he would have no idea how to fix it. lock him in a panic room for a week and he'll come down and be "fixed" eventually. but there's no solving the vampirism, especially if he doesn't know about the cure or if dean has already drunk human blood.

the match-up i'd like to see though is post-canon sam and stanford era dean (2005 dean, right before the pilot): i think their yearning game would be apocalyptic levels of intense. especially if sam is fresh out of 15x20, still wallowing in his grief, still begging for dean to come back to him—and he does, but in the most unexpected way. and dean, four years into missing sam—maybe it's right after john goes missing and dean has never felt so utterly alone in his life. and they find each other, at two wholly different stages in their life, but the longing is the same, the grief is the same, the desire is the same.

anyway thank you for the ask!!! this was a lot of fun to think about :)

[mostlymobilegames]

I don't normally make this kind of "review" so late, usually I write my thoughts very early, when a new story gets published and there's only a few episodes (which didn't happen with Theodora). However, I managed to take advantage of the event and basically binged the entire book. I wouldn't have made this review if I didn't genuinely need to write my opinions on this (like my head might've exploded if I didn't).

!!Spoilers ahead!! and possibly tw? Nothing is too explicit

Because Theodora is, at the moment, only 4 episodes away from the end, I didn't go into the story blind. I knew about almost all the wow moments... and that didn't ruin the experience in the slightest.

I could gush about the author's writing forever, I was beyond impressed with... everything really, the atmosphere, the dialogue, the characters, the story, the descriptions, the MC's introspection, I can't find one thing to complain about when it comes to the style of writing and expressing. It never felt like serious matters were described too superficially, without giving sufficient attention, or too pretentiously, where it's just so artificial to the point of boredom; it stayed just on the line between too little and too much, keeping the reader entertained without feeding them gallons of information.

Maybe the season 3 finale will blow my mind, but honestly season 1 just set the bar so high everything after that just felt like "ok, moving on". This isn't at all an insult to the other two seasons, quite the opposite, I liked how season 2 gave wayyyy more attention to the MC and really dived into her head, because it makes sense. Season 1 takes a very mortal and human Theodora into unprecedented violence and suffering, especially for a woman whose previous concerns were homemaker articles. People are in pain and reality isn't safe. The fate of the burlesque dancers and Madame's unfinished business are serious problems (prostitution, abuse, drugs, abandonment), and very important at that moment, but they are fragments of other people's lives, the MC is mostly an observer, it can't even come close to the trauma of season 1. The story is coming to an end, but it's a handful of people against the villain, not innocent civilians resorting to suicide to remain on their land, coercion on top of coercion, lynching and so on. Season 1 instills terror, it shows not only the extreme fragility of human lives, how easy everything can be taken from you, but also human cruelty and sadism. Neumann isn't a supernatural creature, he's very much human and very much terrifying. I liked how there seemed to be no justice for the bad guys in season 1 and 2, it felt more realistic especially because it is unfair.

I loved how the characters were never put in the background even if they weren't the MCs LI. Being allowed to still have friendships while in a relationship and invest in those friendships is amazing. All the characters felt like humans with real lives that don't revolve around the MC, they didn't disappear if Theodora wasn't into them and their lives didn't start with her. Creating such a strong sense of family in every season with a new cast is also appreciated; even if it seems like a short time the pacing never felt rushed (it is a bit wonky in the last season but not enough to be a problem for me).

The LIs are just great. None of them really lacked anything, everything I said above applies to all of them. I didn't mind at all the "oh shit here we go again" because it perfectly showed the fact that yes, the MC is immortal and everyone around her will die, over and over again. This is where John falls into the soulmate trope thing. I casually romanced him and while I would've liked to be with him in the last season, it wasn't my fault he was in the same season with Charlotte. Regardless, I liked the "demon is soft for human, they are bffs" and John giving literally everything for Theodora with no expectations is my new addiction (though I do want to romance him properly after the story is finished). I could read whole episodes of just their interactions, not even interesting ones, like training or yearning for each other, just... having breakfast and discussing the news, or walking in the park like an old couple.

Now, the MC my beloved

From a young, inexperienced but very determined journalist who wants to make the world proud and her name known to a sad, self destructive and lonely woman, forced to live her life without end, Theodora's mind is really entertaining. Every time she got into her own head, every emotion or lack of emotion, every breakdown, it was all so authentic, I felt what she was feeling having never been in those situations myself. A character drowning in solitude and despair who occasionally sees the light just to be plunged over and over again in the dark and still go on with her life (I mean there's no choice but still).

I liked that she never fell into the not-like-other-girls mess, there was always a sense of solidarity between her and other women, more or less similar to her, without it being exploited to ridiculous levels. She wasn't above anyone but also didn't force camaraderie.

Tbh I would've been fine having like 7 more seasons of Theodora just... living her life in different places while spiralling into madness and alcoholism; that's how good she is. I think overall the characters in this book really tie everything together, like they're the cherry on top but also the frosting and main flavour of the cake.

I devoured this story, I don't even care if the ending won't be satisfactory, the first two season were just mind-blowing. I don't even know what else is there to be said, everything is so good, from the visuals, the music and noises, the CGs, to the writing itself.

For a first story, Arina set huge expectations for her next works.

[zombies-aliens]

I have the best looking girlfriend shit aint even fair for yall bruh. but its right for me, its so right for her. we were meant to be frfr. i hope it all goes well i can't even show a picture of her yall. shes too bad. her drip too hard. godess energy. shes a queen. shes my queen. i really hope we last forever. and not because shes drop dead gorgeous but because shes a kind soul. were both on the same page on that we both hope we last forever. its scary but im committed to her. fuck these hoes man. i wish everyone to be as lucky as me. i might start considering deleting my tumblr at some point in the future. maybe in the next year. im retiring like john cena 😔 no more psycho ahh posts no more thirsty ahh posts when i was on demon time. God has watered my well with a woman. and that woman is the one im with right now. unfortunately its another long distance relationship and my last relationship was also long distance and we broke up because of that since we could never see each other, bless my ex girlfriend, she has a heart of gold and made me know what a healthy relationship feels like, i wont forget her, but not everything was meant to be. if i didn't break up with her i would not have found my current girlfriend who is actually farther out than my ex LMFAOOOOOOO but im not gonna break up with her because of distance, this feels more solid somehow. more mature. more adult. i have so much trust with her. theres been ups and downs but thats part of relationships and its not getting unhealthy or toxic by any means. ideally all will go well, and this will last forever and we will be happy and in love and start a family and enjoy our lives together and raise our kids in the best way we can. ok ok ok this is thinking wayyyy far into the future though. but man. shit is looking good. everything looks promising. when i get into long distance relationships theres that fear of getting catfished but all doubts are cleared thanks to communication and transparency. im with a wonderful woman, and im right for her and she is right for me.

[good-things-do-happen-dean]

don’t mind me, just having a full on breakdown about 2x03 bloodlust vs 8x09 citizen fang. (made EVEN WORSE by ty olsson being one of the vamps in 2x03. like, eli is very different from benny, but still.)

in bloodlust, dean is adamant about wiping out the nest. he’s getting this all or nothing good vs evil, human vs supernatural idea from gordon (because he’s looking for a father figure in the wake of john’s death) and he’s absolutely CONVINCED that vamp=evil=must die. there’s no gray area here. which i kind of get (even though dean is definitely wrong about this) because at this point? they’re young. they don’t know any trustworthy supernatural beings. (they don’t know many trustworthy humans.) they’re fresh off john’s death, who also had gordon’s mindset (going so far as to ORDER HIS CHILD TO SHOOT HIM because he was possessed. and yes, azazel definitely was evil=must die, but still.)

but sam doesn’t buy this. this nest is peaceful. they drink cow blood and it’s disgusting, but they don’t kill humans. sam and dean could and should leave them alone. what harm are they doing? even though he doesn’t really even know them! early sam (and late sam too, idk wtf happened in the middle, see more below) is so much about hope and redemption and kindness.

AND YET. in citizen fang, this is COMPLETELY REVERSED. but WORSE.

dean knows benny! dean trusts benny with his life! (as well he should after purgatory and falling in love). benny is being framed by that other vamp who’s the one actually killing people and dean believes him.

everything is shades of gray by s8. they know supernatural creatures. they BOTH work with them (ALL THE TIME at this point. i mean, come on?? crowley?? CAS???? see more below). they KNOW supernatural=evil=must die IS NOT TRUE (sam should especially know this after demon blood!!! seriously wtf!!!).

and look, benny is bamf but at this point, cas is at full angel power and about a million times more dangerous. i mean good lord (and y’all know i love cas with my whole entire being and soul), he literally just smote unknown numbers of angels and whole mess of humans when he was “god” like. a year ago. but sam trusts him anyway! he’s so glad to have cas back, even though he’s acting weird(er than usual).

but benny?? absolutely not. vamp=evil=must die. (also this happens wayyyy too soon after sam kills dean’s daughter for me. which i’m pretty sure happens as a retaliation because dean killed that girl that ate the brains that sam knew when he was younger, but still. this is the Bad Codependency ShitTM i was talking about yesterday. the brothers can only have each other or friends that they kinda co-parent, e.g., charlie and kevin)

i simply don’t understand. now, it’s been a hot minute since i��ve seen citizen fang, and i get very intense about my benny, but i’m upset!!!!!! about these two episodes in particular!!!!!!

dean is obviously in the wrong in 2x03 (i’m still in the middle of it, but as i recall, he does figure this out and try to rectify it) and sam is obviously in the wrong in 8x09 (and again, it’s been a long ass time, but he does eventually chill out about benny). but i’m just??? ??????   ????????????? why did they do this exact premise again but reversed and also one million times worse because benny. did they?? forget???

look, idk exactly what i’m trying to say with this mess.

probably: something something i love benny something something, something something sam hating benny is so ooc i don’t understand why they did that something something.

hold please, i’m about to go on a very long rant about benny