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masterjedilenawrites · 4 years ago

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The Sniper and The Medic: Chapter 9

Starring: Crosshair, OC Joan Vo

Chapter Warnings: Some angst

Taglist: @proadhog @skippyhopperwisdom

AO3 Link (In case you like it better over there, it’s okay, no judgement)

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Chapter 9: Insult to Injury

Crosshair had never been one to run from conflict. Whether it was with weapons, words, or something in between. Even though he hated it, he hated being ridiculed or attacked, he hated losing or feeling less than, he still embraced the fight. Oftentimes he even started one, just to get ahead of the inevitable confrontation.

This thing with Joan, though, he couldn't bring himself to face. He did everything he could to avoid her. Avoid seeing her, avoid thinking about her.... He managed to make it a whole week, but just barely. It was somehow a harder week than the one he'd spent without seeing her before. He'd liked her then; he'd had hope. Now all he had was his wound pride, and a little nagging voice in the back of his head that wondered if maybe he had overreacted.

But now there were only two days left before their training ended and their lives as soldiers began. And he had to see her. It was required.

He sat on the examination table, the same one he'd sat on all those weeks ago when he'd first met her. He had dreaded that moment, not knowing he'd be dealing with someone like her. Someone so kind and caring toward him and his brothers. Someone who was honest and fair and didn't take crap from anyone. Someone beautiful. He tried not to remember how he'd felt when he'd first seen her, and all the feelings he'd acquired since then. But his stomach churned in protest, the room containing too many memories to simply be ignored.

Doctor Joan strode into the room a few minutes late, wearing her full-length blacks and carrying a datapad. She plopped it unceremoniously onto the table next to him. He planned to not look at her, keep his gaze fixed on the opposite wall, and to not respond to any of her attempts at conversation, only offer short answers to any questions necessary for her final assessment. He expected her to either be upset by it, or just not care.

But instead, Joan was silent. He didn't see her move from his periphery, only stand with arms crossed looking at him with a very neutral expression. He wasn't normally bothered by silence, but this one eventually became unbearable.

He finally glared over at her, and she immediately spoke.

"How are you?"

He snapped his gaze back to the wall with pursed lips. Nope. He wouldn't give in.

"Crosshair."

Usually he'd have to fight to keep his heart steady when he heard her say his name. But she was mad, he could hear it in her voice. His name did not sound so sweet to hear now.

"I'm fine," he said, hoping that would shut her up despite knowing it wouldn't.

"You asked to see me last week," she regarded him with narrow eyes. "And then you blew it off. Hunter says you're busy but I know you're avoiding me. You are not fine. And unless you open up and tell me about it, I don't know how to help you."

She had spoken just long enough for Crosshair to get worked up. He couldn't stop himself from breaking his own resolution to stay silent.

"Just stop," he snapped and her eyes grew wide. "Stop acting like you care. Like you're not just doing a job and none of us matter."

"But I do care," she said slowly.

"Just like you care about the regs?" he dismissed with a snarl. "Calling them your brothers, flirting with them.... You have no idea what they are really like. How... how condescending and spiteful and... and cruel they can be."

He was really worked up now. He jumped off the table and began pacing aimlessly. Words spewed from his mouth, far more than he'd ever said at once before, and he wasn't sure any of them were making sense but he suddenly had a need to get them out.

"The things they say, the names... They call us the bad batch. Bad. Because we're different and so that means we're good for nothing, right? Even though I can shoot a moving target from a thousand meters away, it doesn't matter. Still not good enough."

"Cross..." she started to say softly. But he didn't want her sympathy. He stopped pacing and whirled to face her.

"You don't get it. You don't know what that's like. Everywhere you go, you've got everyone tripping over themselves to get your attention. Me included. And you just eat it up. Like it's a game to you. Acting like you enjoy my company, like I'm special, and then turning around and doing the same thing with some reg."

Joan's look of surprise through his ranting now turned into one of confusion. "I'm sorry... what?"

"Don't act like you don't know," he scoffed. "I saw you laughing with some regs in your office, when you were supposed to be meeting with me."

He was done now. He'd said more than he should have and he didn't like how she still didn't seem to understand. He clenched his jaw and refused to look at her, burning holes into the opposite wall with his gaze instead.

"Wait," she said, tying to wrap her head around it all. "This is about... you're not seriously... jealous?"

"No," he quickly snapped. Maybe a little too quick.

"Okay, good," she stated, starting to come out of her confusion and settle back into her usual, sensible tone. "Because that'd be pretty ridiculous, getting jealous over me being nice to people."

He knew that. As soon as she'd said the word, as soon as he had a name for the emotions he'd been fighting all week, he knew he was being completely and utterly ridiculous. He'd never minded her kindness to his brothers; in fact, he'd admired it. But seeing her with the regs had definitely made him feel jealous. Threatened. He still hated them, he would never budge on that, but he'd had no right to project his anger and insecurities onto Joan.

"I mean, what do you think I do with my time?" she continued, still appalled this was why he had been upset with her. "Just sit around and wait for you to need me? Sure, the clone force is my main responsibility, but there are other ways I'm useful here."

Crosshair lowered his gaze to the floor but kept his posture tense. He wasn't sure what to do now. How could he possibly take back everything he'd said? The foolish and immature way he'd been acting?

Maybe Joan could sense his guilt as she slowly moved closer, like she was approaching an injured animal. He sure felt like he was, albeit, his wounds were of his own fault. She stood just in front of him, silent again, though this time not to coax him into speaking. He looked up at her to see her eyes casting about, thinking of what to say.

"My parents were doctors," she eventually began. "They would travel to underprivileged communities all over the galaxy, even as far as Wild Space. And they'd take me with them. I might not have understood the technical parts of what they did. I'd learn all that on my own later. But they did teach me how to care for people. All peoples, no matter who they were, what they'd done. It's not just my job, but my duty to make people feel better. I can, so I must. Whether it's helping someone recover from an injury, or laughing at a joke that isn't that funny."

She gave him a little smirk, and he found himself falling for her all over again.

"I'm not going to apologize for being nice, especially to those who will probably never meet someone willing to treat them kindly again."

He shook his head rapidly. "No, you're not the one who needs to apologize. I...."

He hesitated with the word, it wasn't one he said very often. He remembered being in a similar situation not too long ago, where he'd snapped at her unfairly, and he'd walked away with only a smile as an apology. She deserved more from him now.

"I'm sorry," he said, trying to say it clearly and confidently. He held her gaze and repeated it for good measure. "I'm sorry, Joan. I shouldn't have been jealous like that. I have no right to tell you how to treat others. And you really are so good to everyone. That's... one of the reasons why I like you."

He didn't say the last part as confidently, dropping his voice low and almost stuttering it out through a suddenly shaky breath.

She smiled and nodded, accepting his apology just like that. No strings, no deals. He wasn't worthy of such simple forgiveness. But he would take what he could get.

"Well uh, just so you know," she said, tucking her hair behind her ears and looking down at the floor. Crosshair felt that familiar wave of warmth rising from his chest, the one he'd been ignoring all week, and thought he'd never get to feel again. He was careful not to get too carried away this time, though. He didn't want to read into anything. He would wait patiently for her to tell him and he wouldn't jump to any wrong conclusions.

"I do enjoy your company. When you asked to see me... Well, I hadn't been having a good week, and that day.... Let's just say I didn't expect to be able to do much. But I ended up looking forward to you coming by. I was worried when you didn't show. It made the day that much worse."

She was still looking downward, and he let his gaze follow hers. Her fingers were twisting the hem of her shirt.

"I know I don't fully understand. Your life, what you've been through. But there's some things you don't know about me, either."

Her hands were so close to his. He reached out for them, carefully testing her reaction as he let his fingers brush against hers, gently loosening them from her shirt, and intertwining them with his own. She seemed hesitant to accept his attempt at comfort, but she wasn't retreating. Not yet. Encouraged, he held on a little more firmly. For a few seconds, she let him, and then she finally withdrew.

"In this room, you are my patient. I have to treat you the same as all my patients. Professionally." She took in a measured breath, her eyes finally looking up into his. "But outside of this room, I'm allowed to have friends. Or enemies. Or... other things."

Her lips twitched into a small smile and so did his. He wasn't sure how he could misinterpret her now.

"What are you doing tonight?"

Her smile grew and she let out a breathless laugh. "Nothing."

"Well, maybe we could get to know each other a little better? Since we've clearly had such a hard time understanding each other so far."

Joan nodded, starting to take a few steps back toward the table, ready to get the examination underway. "I'd like that. What did you have in mind?"

He followed her and sat back atop the table while he thought about it. "Sector 11, just to the right of the double doors. I'll meet you there."

"Okay. I should be wrapped up with all this testing for you boys by eight."

She held up a syringe with an apologetic look.

Oh right, he groaned internally, now snapping back to reality. The dreaded testing....

#star wars #the clone wars #the bad batch #clone force 99 #crosshair #crosshair x oc #angst #but only a little #because apparently i can't handle it #i need people to get along #and i want to write some fluff already

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homestuckexamination · 5 years ago

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funnily enough, i’m interested in your land stuff in the same way i’m into ocs/the homestuck kids—you’re an interesting and knowledgeable figure in my understanding of homestuck and meta and stuff, so i’m like. who is this person. what’s the important info lol.

... :o

You know what, why not?

I am a Seer of Doom. Originally, this title came to me in a Dream, but I’ve learned just how much it fit me over the years. I am a Seer through and through- Passive to a fault, group-oriented, putting others, my friends, ahead of me. I am quite focused on understanding and knowing new things, and helping guide others and helping others understand. I am also definitely a Doombound, I have an understanding of Suffering and all the bad shit people around me are going through, and I may not be able to help, but I’ve found solace and comfort in being there and trying to give pep talks to friends that need them. I am also very anxious and paranoid, to the point of literally having constant visions of worst-case scenarios which I tune out almost instinctively at this point.

I am a completionist, and I am very, very stubborn. When playing games, when doing things, I will actively map out and think things out to optimize whatever I need to do in order to get everything effectively, but at the same time, I have methods and ways of doing things that aren’t always necessarily the most correct or efficient, but god dammit they’re mine and I will not change my ways even if presented with a better option (See, it taking an Update that rendered Tumblr literally unusable before I even considered getting XKit).

I have a very deep fear of isolation. Namely, the fear of incommunication. Something happening that cuts me off from the people I love and care about, them not knowing what’s going on with me, me losing contact with them. This manifested in a bit of an unhealthy manner when I was younger by being extremely clingy and getting very anxious when someone I know online hasn’t been on and said anything in a few days- Only exacerbated by the loss of contact with a partner back in the day.

I got fucked up, academically speaking, because I was always the ‘gifted, smart kid’ in school, and when that didn’t happen to be the case as I grew up, I had no precedent or idea of what to do when my grades started dropping. Pair it with a particularly nasty teacher, and I ended up with a deep dread and anxiety regarding standarized tests and a disdain for classes in general from which I haven’t really recovered. I respond to conflict and change in my life by shutting off and ignoring the problem, which leads to procrastination and some executive dysfunction.

So with all of that put together, my Land would most likely have something to do with my fears and anxieties, and probably try to push me to improve in some way. With my fear of incommunication as mentioned earlier, something blocking the signal from my devices and making it difficult to keep in touch, particularly in a situation as stressful as SBURB, would force me to focus on what’s going on and try to find ways to deal with the situation before I can actually get in touch and help those I love. Add to that anxiety about getting lost, extreme phobia of insects, a fear of losing who I am as a person, and sprinkle it with a few miscellaneous common tropes, and I think I can start seeing my Land coming into shape.

The Land of Thorns and Static. Or LOTAS for short. I considered several names for it but the aesthetic was quite solid in my mind. Thorns refers to thorny bushes, to sharp vines, to gnarled trees. An expanse of forest as far as the eye can see, dark, hazy, and difficult to navigate. Playing into my fear of bugs and my inexperience when it comes to being outside, my affinity for myths and tales of fae and woods, and my love of fantasy in general, a big spooky forest seemed like an adequate setting. Static, on the other hand, plays into the challenge and Quest my land poses.

Through the Land there would be blotches and patches of corruption. Areas, buzzing with static, visual glitching. This ties into Doom as Technology and also aesthetic I vibe with, while giving a perfect hindrance to contact with others in my Session. The static, the dense woods, it all makes communication difficult and sparse, needing to either keep me on the move, or having to learn to trust that my partners will be okay while I push through stuff myself. Of course I also thought about the idea of this Static also ‘corrupting’ one exposed to it. A dream-like haze, forgetting what you’re doing or where you’re going. Making the woods so easy to get lost into, so easy to get wounded in, incommunicated, afraid...

A majority of the Consorts- Which I am going to say are Green Salamanders because I love those glubbing fellas and Green is my favorite color- Would be under this hazy spell permanently. Some lucky Consorts are still free, but they’re terrified, to see their friends and family acting like everything is good and fine while they repeat tasks over and over, while crops die as they lack care from the local farmers. Some fun lore to spice things up, I could see something generic like... A looooong time ago, the people of the Land lived carefree lives. Too carefree. They were so carefree that tales of old began to fade from their collective knowledge. They forgot to heed clear signs and warnings of danger. They forgot to identify clearly bad ideas. And, of course, they forgot to respect the fae and their rules. Angered by their lifestyle, the Denizen of the Land, which is probably Dullahan just because I think it’s cool, fits the woods aesthetic, and is also a fae, made sure that if they wanted to live such carefree and forgetful lives, they would. The spell befell the Land, the corruption started, making Consorts complacent, forgetful, making the woods unforgiving and darkened...

And so it is said that the Seer of Doom would be able to snap the Consorts out of this haze, and find a way to navigate the woods, find Dullahan’s Minions that are keeping the spell active, and confront Dullahan himself.

Playing into my fear of not having enough time, me liking helping others, and such, I could also see some of the main parts of my Quest having Time Limits. NPCs that need rescuing, dungeons that are only accessible for a short span of time, making it so that, even when I can contact people outside my Land, or I am away and helping them, I know there’s tasks that need to be done and I have to both have patience, but also, not put things aside for later in case I need to rush elsewhere for whatever reason.

In definitive, my Land would be an absolutely awful test of stress for me, but it would try and push me to be more ‘independent’ in a way.

That’s what comes to mind, mostly, when I think about it!

Oh also, have a Browser Icon for Dullahan since you got to the end of this post!

#Homestuck #Lands #Denizens #Dullahan #Consorts #HSE #Theories #Fanon #I say uuuuuh #A lot of personal shit so #Be warned #This is also my Land Building Process!#Long Post #Longpost

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ladyfogg · 4 years ago

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May I? - 21/?

Fic Summary: Ensign Faith Diaz struggles to hide her mental illness from her fellow shipmates aboard the Enterprise until an intrigued Data goes out of his way to try to understand her behavior. At his insistence, Faith tries to figure out what she’s truly passionate about and eventually seeks the professional help she needs. Fic Masterpost.

A/N: You’re welcome ;)

Fic Rating: NC-17

Pairing: Data/Female OC

Warnings: tw: depression, tw: anxiety, fluff, friends to lovers, eventual smut

Screenshot by @geekygwen

Life aboard the Enterprise returned to some semblance of normal. Data welcomed the routine, especially after the ordeal he and Faith were forced to endure.

Fajo was handed over to the proper authorities where they were assured he would remain under heavy lock and key. There was still uncertainty surrounding his original release and how it was acquired so quickly. But that was not for them to investigate.

Faith took to her new role in Engineering splendidly. While she still struggled in private, Data noticed she was able to prevent any major outward signs around the crew. He suspected her sessions with Counselor Troi helped in that regard.

He himself saw the counselor twice a week as they worked towards examining his outburst of anger. It was a slow process but one Data found fascinating.

“Data,” Counselor Troi said during one of their sessions. “I know we've already discussed how your episode was triggered by Faith being in danger, but I would like to examine what Faith means to you on an emotional level.”

Data did not feel the need to say he did not have emotions since that was clearly no longer the case.

“I have spent a significant amount of time trying to figure out the same thing,” he admitted. “In many ways, it both is and is not complicated.”

“Oh? How so?”

“Given the evidence presented to me, based on my emotional response to her distress, she is far more important to me than anyone has been prior.”

“How is that complicated?”

“It is not. It is a simple observation. The complication comes from trying to identify the meaning.”

“What do you think it means?”

“She is special to me. Given my body's response to her physical proximity I believe it is more than my positronic net becoming accustomed to her presence.”

Deanna nodded, her eyebrow raised. “Physical response?” she asked. “Have you and Faith been intimate?”

“We have shared intimate moments recently, however we have not been sexual since before our captivity.”

“I see. When you did, what were your thoughts?”

“Well, I enjoyed it a great deal. The tactile sensation was not unpleasant and I found the visuals to be...indescribable.”

Deanna tried not to look surprised but Data could sense her shock at his response. He found this curious as he knew Faith spoke with her as well. He concluded that Faith had not spoken to her about their sexual acts. He was curious as to why though the question was for Faith to answer, not the counselor.

“And having not been able to experience those sensations recently, how does that make you feel?” Deanna asked, ever the professional.

“I do not know.”

Data had not tried to put a feeling to his thoughts. In truth, it had not been a priority. Between his duties on the bridge and hers in Engineering, they saw very little of each other during the day and Faith seemed far too exhausted in the evenings to do much else other than sleep. The thought had occasionally crossed his mind however. There were still many intimate situations they had not experienced together, including intercourse.

Deanna studied him for a moment. “Data, do you think you may be experiencing sexual attraction to Faith?”

“I do find my body’s programmed response to physical stimuli to be particularly...active lately. However, it is only in her presence. It does not seem to be an error in my programming however. I have already run the necessary diagnostics.”

Deanna seemed as though she were trying to suppress a smile. “Well, I do believe you are experiencing another emotion aside from anger.”

“Are you certain, Counselor?” Data asked, eyes lighting up. “What emotion would that be?”

“Desire.”

Data processed her response. “Interesting. I can certainly see how my thoughts and actions could be interpreted as such.”

“Have you shared any of these thoughts with Faith?”

“Yes. I have. We agreed to discuss any possible emotional responses after the incident with Fajo.”

“That's very good, Data,” Deanna beamed. “Communication is important in any relationship. Has she shared her thoughts on the subject?”

“She categorized them as affection. For the most part, she has provided an ear for me to discuss my own thoughts. Sometimes I feel she is hesitant to say what she really feels or thinks. When I asked her why, she explained that she was not an objective party and is afraid she may be projecting what she wants me to be feeling rather than what I am.”

Deanna chuckled. “That sounds like something Faith would say. And in a sense she's right. However, I am an objective party and I can honestly say that I agree. You are clearly feeling affection and desire for your partner. It's beautiful to see, Data.”

He smiled. He had noticed certain members of the crew had taken a notice to his and Faith's relationship. Dr. Crusher had expressed similar sentiments as Troi had. As did Geordi and Riker.

“Counselor,” Data said, switching his focus to a topic that had been plaguing him. “I have a question about relationships.”

“Of course. What is it?”

“Faith and I have been a couple for approximately twenty-two days. At what point is it appropriate to approach the topic of marriage?”

Deanna's mouth dropped open briefly before she tried to compose herself. “You wish to marry Faith?”

“I am aware our relationship is still in its early stage, however I feel it would be prudent to tell Faith my intentions. I do not intend to propose, merely make my intentions known.”

“I see. In human terms, you wish to tell Faith you are serious about your relationship.”

“Correct.”

“Well, then, I would say you should wait for the right time to approach the subject delicately. Perhaps after a romantic dinner or date. Such a discussion is best done when you are both in the proper headspace.”

Data nodded with understanding. “I see. Thank you, Counselor.”

Deanna smiled. “You are very welcome. I believe our time is up for today. I'll see you at the same time next week.”

Data left her office, his mind racing with thoughts of their discussion. There were many aspects of human relationships he was uncertain about. Each day he learned more and more. However, he knew without a doubt he enjoyed his relationship with Faith a great deal.

He believed he was beginning to understand what Commander Riker had tried to explain to him prior to him dating Jenna. The idea of two people coming together as more than just friends did not seem different to him before. However, he realized he was mistaken.

It was different. Yes, Faith was his friend and confidante, but to have more than that constantly intrigued Data. She took care of him, not that Data required much care, but she made sure to check in with him to see how he was functioning.

She was cautious and aware of his developing feelings and embraced them as much as she could. Not that he had shown any signs since his anger episode but she made it a point to address any questions or concerns he had.

Spot seemed to tolerate her, though Data suspected it was because Faith fed her several days a week due to Data working the night shift on the bridge. Occasionally, he had found Spot curled up behind Faith's legs when he returned to his quarters in the early morning. But the feline would immediately move and pretend as though she had not been purring.

Cats were indeed strange creatures.

When Data reached his quarters, he was surprised to find Faith there already, kicking off her shoes.

“Hey, you,” she smiled brightly, though she still seemed tired. She rubbed her feet as she winced. She had been spending many hours standing lately and he suspected they were sore.

“Hello, Faith. You are finished early.”

“Yeah, Geordi kicked me out of Engineering. Said I needed to take a break. I didn't realize how much I've been working lately.”

“Your responsibilities have increased with your promotion. I am not surprised at your workload.”

“Well, no work talk tonight. I am perfectly happy to have a quiet evening with my super cute boyfriend.” She patted the spot next to her on the bed.

Data took the offered seat, slipping his arm around her shoulders. “I am equally enthused to spend time with my aesthetically pleasing mate as well.”

Faith chuckled. “You're such a charmer.” She leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. “What do you want to do tonight?”

“First, you must eat dinner,” Data insisted. “Then, perhaps dessert and some...intimate time?”

Faith's eyebrows shot up and she smirked. “You asking me for sex, Data?”

He leaned his forehead against hers. “If you so choose, mi alma.”

“Hell, forget the dinner!”

She pounced on him, pinning him down to the bed. Her quickness surprised him and did not give him room to react. When she bent down to kiss him, it was much more passionate than before.

His body responded instantly to the stimulation, his penis swelling at the sensation of her warm body sprawled out on top of his.

He had to gently push her away to break the kiss. “Faith, as arousing as this is, I must insist you eat dinner first,” he said, staring up at her. “I do not want you to miss a meal on my behalf.”

Faith sighed dramatically but there was an affectionate smile on her lips. “You're probably right. I am pretty hungry.” She gave him another kiss before sliding off his lap.

“Excellent,” Data said, sitting up and willing his body to return to its normal state. “You change into something more comfortable and I'll prepare dinner.”

Faith picked up her shoes and stood. After a quick stretch, she headed for the door. “Sounds good. I'll be back in twenty minutes.”

“Faith?” Data asked as he stood.

She paused and turned back. “Yeah, babe?”

“It seems counterproductive for you to keep your separate quarters when you spend your evenings with me. Would it not save time for you to bring your things here?”

Faith's eyes widened. “Data, are you asking me to move in with you?”

“It would be the most efficient and logical solution. We spend every evening together and I have grown accustomed to your company. I understand if you decide to decline. I do not want you to feel any obligation.”

Faith bent her head, fiddling with the shoes in her hand. When she looked at him, she gave him a soft smile. “I-I would actually really like that.”

Data smiled back. “Shall I help you with your things?”

“No, no, you stay and make dinner,” Faith insisted. “I'll grab a couple of things and come back. We can move my stuff another time.”

“As you wish.”

Cheeks considerably darker than they were before, Faith’s smile widened as she backed up towards the door. “I'll see you in a few minutes.”

When she left, Data set about preparing the table for their meal. He laid out a tablecloth and set candles in the center. Roses came next and he set them in a clear vase in the center, turning them just right so their fragrance would be directed towards Faith.

He did not always set the table but he had not done so since their first date. If they were to be intimate later, his programming highlighted the importance of having a romantic setting.

As he turned to the replicator however, a voice sounded behind him.

“Oh isn't this positively domestic?”

Data turned around to find Q sitting at the table he had just set. His appearance was unexpected and unwelcome.

“Q? What are you doing here?” Data asked.

The being sat back looking bored. “I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd pop in and see how my old friends on the Enterprise are doing. Imagine my surprise to find you, an android, shacking up with a human,” he said.

He picked up the unlit candle to examine it. Data took it from his hands and placed it back down in its proper place.

“Have you been spying on us?” Data asked. “That is extremely inappropriate. I must ask you to leave.”

“Don't get your panties in a bunch,” Q snorted. “I was only observing that little conversation you just had. Having a human move in with you? Data, I know they intrigue you but you should never bring your work home with you.”

“Faith is not work or an experiment,” Data said. “She is my girlfriend and I would appreciate it if you would not interfere in our relationship.”

“Wouldn't dream of it. I've got more important things to worry about anyway. I was simply curious about this little development. She knows you can't feel emotion right?”

“Actually, it seems I have been developing basic human emotions,” Data said. “So far I have experienced two instances of anger.”

Q sat up with interest. “Really? Do tell!”

“Perhaps another time,” Data said. “Faith will be back soon and I wish to have dinner ready when she returns.”

“Look at you, acting like a good little mate,” Q said, sarcasm dripping from every word. “Such a sophisticated android who could be doing anything with his life and yet he's here playing house.”

Data studied Q. “You do not approve of my relationship with Faith.”

“I don't see the point in it. You are well aware of my feelings towards humans. Why you would waste your time with one is beyond me.”

“Then perhaps you are not as all-knowing as you claim to be.”

Q chuckled. “So sassy for an android. Did the human teach you sass?”

“Among other things. You have overstayed your welcome. Please leave. I will not be as nice if I have to ask again.”

“Alright, alright, I'm going. I'll check back in a few months to see if you still feel the same way then.”

There was a flash of white light and then Q was gone. His sudden arrival was suspicious and Data felt the captain should be made aware.

He tapped his communicator. “Data to Captain Picard.”

“Go ahead.”

“I have just had a surprise visit from Q in my quarters. He is gone now but I thought you should be made aware.”

There was a heavy sigh from Picard. “Thank you, Mr. Data. I shall keep an eye out for the menace.”

There was a pause.

“It looks like he's made an appearance on the bridge as well.”

“Do you need assistance, sir?”

“No, no. We will handle it. Picard out.”

Satisfied he had performed his duties, Data waited two minutes to make sure he was not summoned by Q or the captain. When neither reached out, he returned to his dinner preparations.

He replicated plates of grilled chicken, broiled potatoes, and Brussel sprouts, along with a large salad. Faith tended to replicate small dishes for herself and he wanted to make sure she received the proper nutrition.

Faith arrived several moments later as he poured her a glass of wine, a bag slung over her shoulder. Her presence put Data at ease and turned his focus away from Q.

“This all looks amazing,” Faith said, putting her bag on the floor by the closet. “Candles, flowers...you spoil me.”

“Is it not customary to shower your mate with romantic gestures and affection?” Data asked, holding out her chair.

Faith chuckled as she sat. She had changed into loose gray pants and a soft blue blouse. “Apparently for some people that's up for debate. I enjoy it a great deal so please don't stop.”

Data tucked her chair in before he joined her at the table.

She picked up her fork and began to eat. “How was your day?”

The next hour or so was filled with idle talk about their various duties throughout the day. Engineering had finished routine maintenance on many of the ship's primary functions and were in the process of training new personnel.

Data shared what he had done throughout the day and also filled her in on Q’s mysterious appearance.

“Q? As in the Q?” she asked.

Data had told her stories of the omnipotent being several times before. “Yes, the captain is dealing with him now. It's best we ignore Q unless the captain needs our help.”

“Fine by me,” Faith said, pushing her empty plate away. “From what you've told, I'm not eager to meet him.”

“Are you ready for dessert?” Data asked, clearing their plates.

“Yes, please! What do you have in mind?”

Data returned to the table with a chocolate lava cake, topped with vanilla ice cream. Faith clapped excitedly.

“My favorite!” she exclaimed.

“I am aware.”

Data did not anticipate how much it would please him to see Faith enjoying herself. It was a stark contrast to how she had been when they first met.

“I have the next two days free. Is there anything you'd like to do together?” she asked before taking a large bite of her dessert.

“I do wish to start planning my art show. Counselor Troi has suggested a few dates and Guinan has offered Ten Forward as a location.”

“Awesome! I'd love to help any way I can. What pieces have you decided to showcase?”

Data studied Faith carefully. She looked relaxed and happy. Though he thought that it would be a good time to approach the subject of their relationship, he concluded her agreement to move in with him already touched on the subject.

She would not have accepted if she was not serious about their union.

“There is a painting I have been working on for some time that I wish to showcase but I would like your approval first.”

“Babe, it's your show. You don't need my approval for anything.”

“For this particular painting, I believe I do.”

He stood from the table and went to his personal office to collect the canvas. Faith patiently waited, looking confused yet intrigued.

When Data brought the painting to her, he did not reveal it right away.

“I have been working on this for some time and did not want to share it with you until I felt it captured what I was trying to convey.”

Data turned the canvas around.

The scene he had depicted was from their time in the shuttle. It was from Data's perspective, looking up at her while she straddled his lap. The image itself was from her shoulders up, though it was clear from the bareness of them that she was intended to be naked.

Her hair was loose and wild, her eyes soft and hooded as she looked on with deep affection. He had painted the background dark blue with stars surrounding her frame as if she were a constellation and the image was his vision of her in the night sky.

“Data…” Faith said in a low voice. “This is…” Words seemed to fail her.

“Given the intimate nature of the image, you can understand my hesitancy to use it in the show.”

Faith stood, stepping around the table to approach him. “Use the painting,” she said in a firm voice. “I've never felt more beautiful than I do when I look at the paintings you've done of me.”

Data smiled and leaned forward for a kiss. Faith responded enthusiastically. She broke it for a moment to carefully take the canvas from him and prop it against the wall before she returned her attention to him.

Her arms circled his neck as she kissed him deeply. The pressure of her lips and the way her body pressed to his let Data know how much she appreciated what he had done. She tended to be more forceful with her kisses when she was particularly emotional.

Data placed his hands on her hips and returned the favor, nearly bending her backward as he opened his mouth to her.

The tone shifted dramatically after that. Faith's hands tugged on his uniform, fingers buried in the fabric as her tongue boldly stroked his.

When they parted again, she was panting. “Make love to me, Data.”

Without a word, Data lifted her into his arms and carried her to the bed.

She so seldom used such a tone that Data was compelled to follow through. It was more than that, of course. They had already been through so much together, he wanted to provide a pleasurable memory rather than an anxious one. He himself also wanted to experience sex with her and if she was ready, he would be happy to oblige.

Data laid her down on the bed before stepping out of his shoes and joining her.

“Computer, activate ‘do not disturb’ function,” Data said.

Faith smirked as the computer responded, “Do not disturb function has been activated. Communication to Lieutenant Commander Data and Lieutenant Diaz has been suspended. Commander Data's quarters are locked and cannot be overridden.”

“Afraid of being interrupted?” Faith asked.

“It does seem to happen frequently.”

“Not tonight.” She slid her hand into his hair and pulled him towards her. “Not now. It's just you and me, babe.”

Data kissed her, pressing her back into the mattress as he lay his body over hers. He was unused to being in such a dominant position however Faith did not seem to mind.

In fact, the tension left her body and she became relaxed, arms circling his neck as her mouth continued to taste his. Data did not wish to waste time, though he knew Faith did not enjoy going too fast. So he was slow and careful when he reached underneath her body to slide his hands underneath her blouse. She arched her back to help, allowing him to free her from the constricting fabric.

He broke away from her lips to sit back on his heels, peeling the shirt from her body. Her chest was already rising and falling as she took rapid breaths, her nipples hardening from the coolness of the room. He dragged her pants down and off her legs, dropping them to the floor.

Faith reached up to do her hair, allowing her wild curls to fall around her face. Data enjoyed it that way. He liked the way the curls framed her heart-shaped face.

Once she was fully bare, she sat up to kiss him, her hands reaching around to pull at his uniform’s zipper. Data kept his focus on her body, marveling at how the smoothness and warmth felt against his palms.

When her hands slid into his uniform to touch him, he felt a change. Almost like a stab of emotion that forced a gasp from his lips.

It surprised them both.

Faith drew back. “Are you alright?”

Data nodded. “Yes. Please continue.” He kissed her rougher than he intended, muffling her surprised squeak as his hands grabbed for her again.

Suddenly, going slow did not seem like a necessity. Faith tugged at his uniform until Data managed to rid himself of it. As soon as it was gone, she straddled his lap, mouth hot as it hungrily moved against his.

Data's erection was trapped between their bodies, nestled tightly against the wet heat of her. He had not touched her and yet, she was slick for him. Faith moaned and ground against it, drawing back from their kiss to look him in the eye.

“Please, say you want this as much as I do,” she whimpered, top teeth digging into her plump lower lip.

Emotion unlike any he had yet to experience course through Data and he flipped Faith onto her back without a second thought or hesitation. “Faith, I wish to make love to you. May I?”

She nodded with rapid movement, legs circling his waist. “Please, Data.”

He reached down to stroke her slit, only to find her more than ready for him. He still touched her, enjoying the moans and sighs that came from her when he did.

Data pushed slowly into her. It was as if time stood still. Any background thoughts or processes went silent as Data's focus became solely on Faith. She gasped loudly, throwing her head back as he breached her.

“Stars!”

Data froze. “Are you alright?”

He received an urgent nod and a nudge from the heel digging into his lower back. “Yes, fuck yes, keep going.”

The crude swear excited Data. It was a different side to Faith he had never witnessed and it enticed him to continue. He pushed himself in until the base of him pressed snuggly against her warmth.

Faith's body was trembling but before he could ask again if she was alright, she kissed him deeply, tongue pushing past his lips in earnest.

So Data began to move.

His thrusts were steady as he listened to the sounds Faith made. She whimpered and moaned into his mouth, seemingly unable or unwilling to stop kissing him. Remembering the sensitivity to her neck, he kissed his way there, finding the spot in question and reveling at the way her body jerked in response.

Everything about her invaded his senses. Her taste, the feel of her, the sounds she made, her scent. It all imprinted itself on his memory chips in a way he knew he'd recall for years to come.

He found when he thrust deeper, her body shook and her moans increased in volume. So he did it repeatedly.

Faith's hands were roaming his back and shoulders, nails digging into his skin. If he were human it would have left marks.

For the first time in his existence, he wished he could bruise or be scratched.

Her body was beginning to perspire which made her skin practically glide along with his. As much as he enjoyed the closeness, Data wanted to see her face.

Tucking his knees beneath her, he pulled himself up just enough to stare down at her, his hands pressed into the mattress on either side of her head.

Faith never looked more beautiful to him than she did at that moment.

Her cheeks were dark, her eyes were nearly black from her wide pupils, and her breast moved with the force of his thrusts. She clung to him as if she were afraid he would disappear.

The strong urge to protect her suddenly hit him tenfold and he knew that he would give her the universe if she asked.

Which was physically impossible but he would be willing to try.

“Data...I'm so close, babe,” she moaned, eyes falling closed.

Data kissed her deeply, hand sliding between their bodies so his thumb could bring her to completion.

Faith came saying his name, back arched as she rode out her pleasure. Data did not stop. He kept going, kept stroking her nub with his thumb even when she started to tremble. He wanted to see it again. Her loss of control was extremely erotic.

The second time was not as big as the first but she was just as loud. It was only when her body sank into the bed that Data finished as well, staying inside her until his release was complete.

Dazed and smiling, Faith slid her arms around his neck and pulled him down to rest her forehead against his.

“Magical,” she panted. “Just magical.”

“I am inclined to agree. Was that satisfactory?”

“Data that was so...so...passionate.”

Data was excited at her description. Nothing he had ever done had been described as passionate before. “It is what you deserve, Faith. You deserve everything.”

Her eyes began to water but before he could grow concerned, she kissed him again and he knew she appreciated his words.

#commander data #lt commander data #Data Soong #data tng #star trek next generation

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mostlycompetentwriter · 5 years ago

Text

I Am You: Chapter 3

Pairing: OC x Bang Chan x Han Jisung x Seo Changbin

Genre: Romantic Fantasy

Warnings: Smut, some mentions of blood and gore

Previous Chapters: (chapter 1), (chapter 2)

Note: Just to clarify, in the scene where Myah and Changbin are both wolves, they use a special mind link to speak to one another. All pack members can communicate while they are wolves. However, mates can speak to one another no matter what form their partner happens to be in. This is how human Changbin is able to communicate with wolf Myah.

“Have you seen Changbin?” I asked Felix, watching the younger alpha absent-mindedly skin the deer laid out on the table in front of us.

“I think he’s hunting,” Felix replied, frowning as he let out a disgusted sound. “It would be nice if he could skin his own kill every once in a while.”

“He’s always hunting,” I huffed in frustration.

Felix shrugged, “He’s probably not far out. He just left like fifteen minutes ago. You can probably catch up to him if you need something.”

I immediately heeded Felix’s suggestion, shifting forms carefully, as it had certainly been a while since I last allowed my wolf to takeover. However, I knew it would be much easier to catch up to Changbin with a better nose, relying purely on smell to find my tsundere mate. And I picked up on his trail fast, following his scent slowly while I still felt unsteady on the four legs replacing my usual two. I really needed to run more with Jisung when he offered. It was almost embarrassing how out-of-touch I felt with my hyper-active wolf, especially after experiencing yet another clumsy fall along the mountain rocks.

I was fully committed to shifting every day.

Thankfully, I found Changbin quickly, distracted by the small doe grazing a hundred yards or so away. I waited patiently, making sure my scent was down-wind so that he couldn’t possibly blame me if he missed this kill. But Changbin was the pack’s best hunter, and he tracked down the unsuspecting creature with startling astuteness.

It was as he was dragging the doe back down the cliffside that he spotted me. His dark brown wolf let out a grumpy growl as he walked over to where I waited. He let the prey fall from his mouth, regarding me with a look that I could only describe as reprimanding.

I heard his voice speak clearly through our mind-link. “You shouldn’t be out here.”

I refused to back down. “You’re always hunting these days. How else was I supposed to talk to you?”

Changbin’s wolf was imposing as he stood over me. He was bigger than most wolves, and he exuded power and dominance. “Go back to camp.”

I watched as he leaned back down to pick up the doe. “Will you talk to me tonight?”

“I’m hunting late.”

I let out a sharp bark, racing ahead to block his path. “Why are you ignoring me?”

“Don’t act like this, Myah.”

“I don’t understand why you can’t talk to me. Are you really going to punish me for something I already forgave you for?”

He bullied his way past me. “It’s dangerous up here. Now go home.”

Stung by his disregard, I obeyed his order, starting back down the path with much less spring than I had before. I glanced back over my shoulder at the big alpha, wondering if Changbin knew how much he was hurting me.

But distractions were never a good thing on the mountain, and I heard the switch before I felt its claws. Unfortunately, I had failed to keep an eye on the path in front of me, as Changbin had constantly warned me about, but that didn’t make it any less shocking. Which is probably why, at first, the pain from the trap didn’t register over my surprise. But then I felt it deeply when I saw the blood. I let out a pained howl, instinctively trying to pry my leg away from the source of my pain. It only worsened the situation, the sharp edges digging brutally into my flesh.

“Don’t move!”

I heard his command before I could scent him, but Changbin was suddenly there, burying his head into the side of my neck, releasing soothing alpha pheromones even as the pain grew to an unbearable level. I fell to the ground, craning my neck around to look at my mangled leg, bits of flesh and blood amidst the silver trap. I saw fingers next, faintly realizing Changbin had shifted to his human form, working at the trap.

Then I heard the mountain lion’s growl.

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“I think Channie hates me,” I complained to Jisung, watching the alpha move about his room, a towel wrapped messily around his waist.

“Chan doesn’t hate you,” Jisung chided gently, digging for a pair of sweatpants out of his closet.

“What did I do?” I asked, ignoring Jisung as I rolled onto my back, looking up at the ceiling.

“Chan’s just stressed,” Jisung said. “He’s got a lot of decisions to make.”

“Mating shouldn’t be a difficult decision,” I muttered because it was true. In fact, mating should be easy with the person you love.

“Don’t be impatient,” Jisung said, suddenly appearing above me. “Chan always thinks about everything too much, you know how he is.”

“It shouldn’t require any thinking,” I said, letting out a whine of protest when Jisung moved onto the bed, crowding me into the mattress. I broke off only when I was wrapped in Jisung’s arms, secure against his strong chest. His vanilla scent surrounded me, and I could tell he was releasing calming pheromones, which I appreciated.

“Everything will work out in time,” Jisung whispered, pressing a tender kiss to the side of my temple.

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“Changbin!” I cried out through the bond, watching the mountain lion creep closer, likely smelling my blood in the air.

Changbin managed to open the trap and I whined as I pulled my leg free. “Can you shift?” he asked me, but I was in too much pain to concentrate so I shook my head, desperately trying to push myself onto all four legs, but collapsing back down each time. The mountain lion growled, haunches raised in an attack position. Changbin shifted back easily, his intimidating wolf forcing the lion to briefly reconsider its plan. “Don’t worry,” Changbin said, using the mind link to offer me calming reassurances.

I threw back my head to howl, hoping our other packmates could hear the call. Unfortunately, it also prompted the lion into action and it launched itself at Changbin. I watched in horror as it wrestled Changbin to his back, exposing his soft underbelly and tender throat. The sound of its claws slashing through fur and flesh was revolting and my stomach churned dangerously. Changbin fought back, using his hind legs to push the lion off, reclaiming an upright position before chasing after the lion, nipping at its weaker tendons. The lion stumbled on the loose rocks and Changbin brought it down, tearing into whatever flesh his teeth could sink into.

I looked away from the gruesome scene, calling out for Chan and Jisung through the mating bond, but they were probably too far away to hear my pleas. Instead, I let my wolf take control, and she slowly started limping us over to the coverage of the bushes, hoping to disguise the scent of our blood. However, the lion did not like her decision, losing sight of its easy prey. He managed to throw Changbin off, and I winced as his body crashed into the side of the rocks. I tried to throw myself forward but let out a pained yelp when I felt the lion’s teeth dig into my leg, pulling me away from my destination.

I whined loudly, panting hard against wave after wave of pain, my flesh wound reopened by the lion’s unforgiving teeth. We started down the slope and I knew I was going to die. The lion would easily drag me somewhere it was familiar with, ripping into my throat before using my carcass as its meal for the next several days. I was poisoned with fear, watching my life slowly drain out onto the rocks around me.

But Changbin hadn’t given up, and the lion was unprepared for Changbin to attack again. My mate managed to wrestle the lion into a precarious position of weakness, immediately going for its throat and locking his teeth around its pulse point. I faintly observed Changbin pulling back with a large chunk of flesh between his teeth, my vision swimming in and out of focus. I did register Changbin’s dark scent, and his familiar voice trying to reach out to me, even as the blackness finally claimed me.

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I knew Chan was going to break up with me.

I could tell by his posture, by the distinct way he was hunched in on himself, doing no favors to his taller height. He was also unusually quiet, taking me by the hand to lead me to the meadow where we always played together as children. The one his mother had taken us to for the very first time when we were barely five years old. It was a special place full of meaning and Chan knew how important it was to me, how I always felt calmer when I was surrounded by the familiar daffodils.

He wanted me to be comfortable because the news he was going to deliver would likely break my heart. This was all I could think about when Chan finally turned around to face me, eyes distant and sorrowful. “Myah,” he said my name, and my heart reached out to him. “Do you love Jisung and Changbin?”

I was thrown by the unexpected question. “Of course I do.”

“You know they’ll always take care of you, right?”

Chan’s questions seemed misplaced. “What are you talking about?”

Chan sighed, stuffing his hands into the pocket of his jacket. “Jisung and Changbin are starting their own pack, you know.”

I nodded because it was usually all Jisung talked about. He was beyond excited to lead his own pack, and Changbin was relieved to get away and start his own family. Felix would be joining, along with several of their friends: Seungmin, Minho, Hyunjin, Jeongin, and Woojin. I was excited because I adored the idea of starting something new, especially with my mates by my side.

But that needed to include Chan as well.

“My father wants me to stay here,” he finally said. “He wants me to lead his pack in the future.”

I immediately shook my head. “You have to come with us, Chan. Jisung and Changbin are your best friends, and I-”

“I’ll get in the way,” Chan interrupted. “You already have two mates, Myah. They both adore you.”

“But I need you too,” I protested, squeezing our intertwined hands. “You mean so much to me, Chan. We’ve known each other since we were kids.”

“I know,” Chan agreed, pausing to look around, a nostalgic smile on his face. “We got into a lot of trouble together, but that was a long time ago. We both have to start considering our futures.”

I stepped in closer, eliminating more of the space between us, even though it still felt like it wasn’t enough. “My future means nothing without you in it.”

Chan’s expression softened. “I can’t do that to you.”

“You’ll break my heart,” I warned him. “You’ll hurt me and you promised you wouldn’t.”

“Not if you don’t let me,” Chan countered. “You deserve a long life, Myah, with Jisung and Changbin.”

“With you,” I insisted earnestly. “Chan, if it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have Jisung or Changbin.”

“But you do have them,” he said. “You’ll always have them.”

He tenderly reached out, thumbing his way across Changbin’s mark on my neck. “But I need your mark.”

“It’s too much.”

“Not it’s not!” I disagreed, clutching even more tightly to him, feeling like he might vanish at any moment. “Chan, you made a promise to me! You can’t say these things...Please don’t leave me.”

I was starting to panic and Chan picked up on it, releasing more of his soothing scent which I consumed greedily, faced with the possibility of never having it again. “I’ll visit when I can.”

“It won’t be the same,” I trembled, disregarding the space he tried to maintain, collapsing into his arms.

“You’ll move on.”

“No, I won’t,” I insisted, leaning up to scent him. “Why are you doing this? Why bother even promising it to me if you never planned on keeping it?”

He winced as if my comment caused him physical pain. “At one point, I did intend to keep it, but then you mated with Jisung and Changbin. I could see the change in you, the way you looked happier around them. You really don’t need me anymore, Myah. It’s just hard to let go of the past.”

My tears were soaking through his t-shirt, but I knew Chan didn’t care. “If you leave me, I’ll miss you every day. You’re my best friend, Chan. My soulmate.”

“Be good for me,” he whispered into my hair.

“Stop it!” I harshly interjected, abruptly pulling out his arms, startling both of us. “Stop saying that you’re leaving. If you really loved me, then you would stay.” Chan was at a loss for words, opening his mouth before closing it again. “I don’t care about your father’s pack now,” I continued, “I care about the one I’m building, and I refuse to be a part of it without you. How can you not understand how much you mean to me? I don’t just want you, Chan, I need you! I depend on you for so much and if you left, I’ll be completely empty, because you won’t be there to fill those places anymore.”

I was incoherent, tasting my salty tears as I shook my head vigorously, refusing to acknowledge Chan’s words. Empty threats, that’s all they were. Chan had been mine from the moment we met, and nothing would ever tear us apart. No matter how many people came between us, or how many fights we got into, or how he could ever think we’d be able to live without one another. Chan caught me in his arms before my knees gave out and he brought us both to the ground, holding me close as I cried against his chest. “What can I do to convince you?” I pleaded with him. “I’ll do anything.”

For a while he was quiet and I continued to sob those terrible soul-wrenching cries that jarred the places inside of me that was frightening. Dark places I tried to hide away, like the evil voice that sometimes whispered that I wasn’t good enough for any of them. That voice might be right, but I always did my best. I would always fight for them.

Finally, Chan gently encouraged me to lean back, drying my tears with his sleeves. He picked up my wrist, brushing his lips across the blue-colored veins decorating the surface of my creamy skin. “Shall I do it here?” he asked, glancing up at me with eyes that reminded me of home.

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I could only smell Changbin when I woke up, dizzy with the after effects of restless sleep. His scent was spiked with fear. It was enough to pull me back to consciousness, and I blinked against the blinding white light infiltrating my line of vision. “Ah,” a familiar voice spoke. “You’re finally awake?”

I glanced over at Woojin. “How long have I been out?”

“A day or so,” he replied, “But I think it was the trauma. Your leg will take some time to heal.”

I sat up slowly, listening to Woojin’s advice while leaning back against the bed frame. “Is it really bad?”

“I’ve seen worse, but that was back during my training. You’re the first real injury we’ve had in the new pack.”

“That sucks,” I said, and Woojin chuckled.

“Your mates have been worrying all night,” Woojin informed me. “I couldn’t get Changbin to leave. His scent was everywhere.”

“I can smell it,” I acknowledged. “But when you say mates-”

“Felix freaked out,” Woojin said, rolling his eyes. “He and Seungmin ran all the way to the border, and I’m sure they made it sound far worse than it actually was.”

“That was an important meeting,” I said. “They shouldn’t have done that.”

“Well, Felix is young, and it’s hard to be in your right mind when the third in command is running around nearly hysterical. I had to give Changbin some morphine, his body was halfway between wolf and human. It wasn’t pleasant to see.”

“Great,” I muttered because I didn’t like the idea of everything falling apart over me.

“They can return to the northern lands later,” Woojin said as if he knew exactly what I had been thinking. “I’m sure Taeyong would gladly welcome back Chan and Jisung. He has a mate of his own and understands how it feels to be away when they’re hurt.”

“I can’t really move it,” I said, frowning at my immobile leg. “Is that normal?”

“It’s the cast,” Woojin explained. “Do you feel well enough to talk to your alphas?”

I groaned at the idea of dealing with their high-strung whining, mothering me to the point where I felt suffocated. Woojin grinned. “I can tell them you’re still sleeping.”

“Maybe for tonight,” I agreed.

Not because I didn’t love them, of course, but because they could turn into an absolute nightmare when their alpha instincts insisted I was on my deathbed as opposed to a sterile hospital cot frowning down at my new cast.

It would be a long recovery.

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I could feel Chan everywhere.

I tried not to wince at the pain, instead focusing on the growing bond, ignoring the way his teeth sank into my wrist, eyes bright with a vivid orange color. Instead, I only thought about Chan and it made the pain bearable. I thought about his lovely hair, naturally curly, thick strands soft between my fingers. I thought about his gorgeous eyes or the wicked slope of his nose. I thought about his handsome features, and how his smile completely eclipsed even the lowest of my moods. I thought about his warm voice and familiar scent, the rich smell of pine that reminded me of my childhood.

I thought about the way Chan made love to me, treating me like I was fragile. His body covering mine, sheltering me under his protective form. His soft kisses drawing small moans, encouraging him to give more. His pulsing cock inside of me, filling me to the brim with all the love he could give. A special kind of love incomparable to the way I felt with Jisung or Changbin.

Because Chan was encompassing. He was everywhere, present at all the points in my life I could remember, good or bad. And he filled all my empty places, the darkest parts of myself that I hated, but he managed to bring light to them all. He was everything I needed to feel complete, marked by three alpha wolves who would do absolutely anything my heart desired.

I was finally me.

#stray kids #stray kids fanfic #bang chan #chan fanfic #han jisung #jisung #han jisung fanfic #seo changbin #changbin fanfic #werewolves au #i am you #stray kids smut #3racha #3racha smut

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diepower · 4 years ago

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THE MEGA RP PLOTTING SHEET / MEME.

First and foremost, recall that no one is perfect, we all had witnessed some plotting once which did not went too well, be it because of us or our partner. So here have this, which may help for future plotting. It’s a lot! Yes, but perhaps give your partners some insight? Anyway BOLD what fully applies, italicize if only somewhat.

MUN NAME: Kaiman AGE: 27 CONTACT: IM, ask, discord

CHARACTER(S): Meninas McAllon, Orihime Inoue, Retsu Unohana, Mashiro Kuna, Tier Harribel, Charlotte Chuuhlhourne

CURRENT FANDOM(S): That I write in? It’s gonna be Bleach, OVW (super selectively im just here for one person), ASOIAF (barely- literally when the mood strikes and that one is private also). I have a lot of current interests in general though.

BLEACH FANDOM(S) YOU HAVE AN AU FOR: While I don’t have anything fully established... I’ve been working with an ASOIAF au (for Harribel & Unohana specifically, though I’m considering it with other characters too), A Dorohedoro AU (for Unohana and Orihime), as well as a Persona AU (more specifically 2&3) for Orihime. I’ve also got a number of post-canon AUs or continuities for all my characters as well!

MY LANGUAGE(S): English, super basic Spanish, barest ASL, fairly good French

THEMES I’M INTERESTED IN FOR RP: FANTASY / SCIENCE FICTION / HORROR / WESTERN / ROMANCE / THRILLER / MYSTERY / DYSTOPIA / ADVENTURE / MODERN / EROTIC / CRIME / MYTHOLOGY / CLASSIC / HISTORY / RENAISSANCE / MEDIEVAL / ANCIENT / WAR / FAMILY / POLITICS / RELIGION / SCHOOL / ADULTHOOD / CHILDHOOD / APOCALYPTIC / GODS / SPORT / MUSIC / SCIENCE / FIGHTS / ANGST / SMUT / DRAMA

PREFERRED THREAD LENGTH: ONE-LINER / 1 PARA / 2 PARA / 3+ / NOVELLA (2para is a sweet spot but it really doesn’t matter to me)

ASKS CAN BE SEND BY: MUTUALS / NON-MUTUALS / PERSONALS / ANONS.

CAN ASKS BE CONTINUED?: YES / NO ONLY BY MUTUALS?: YES / NO

PREFERRED THREAD TYPE: CRACK / CASUAL NOTHING TOO DEEP / SERIOUS / DEEP AS HECK.

IS REALISM / RESEARCH IMPORTANT FOR YOU IN CERTAIN THEMES?: YES / NO.

ARE YOU ATM OPEN FOR NEW PLOTS?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.

DO YOU HANDLE YOUR DRAFT / ASK - COUNT WELL?: YES / NO / SOMEWHAT. (i let them build up too often but some of yall are too quick to reply jkglfjdgsd)

HOW LONG DO YOU USUALLY TAKE TO REPLY?: 24H / 1 WEEK / 2 WEEKS / 3+ / MONTHS / YEARS / DEPENDS ON MOOD AND INSPIRATION, AND IF I’M BUSY

I’M OKAY WITH INTERACTING: ORIGINAL CHARACTERS / A RELATIVE OF MY CHARACTER (AN OC) / DUPLICATES / MY FANDOM / CROSSOVERS / MULTI-MUSES / SELF-INSERTS / PEOPLE WITH NO AU VERSE FOR MY FANDOM / CANON-DIVERGENT PORTRAYALS / AU-VERSIONS (italicized are okay, but under really specific circumstances)

DO YOU POST MORE IC OR OOC?: IC / OOC.

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WITH FOLLOWING OTHERS?: YES / NO / DEPENDS

BEST WAYS TO APPROACH YOU FOR RP/PLOTTING: I’m pretty anal about plotting in that I often refuse to RP unless it’s been plotted or I liked a starter call. And in the case of the latter, I’ll still hop into DMs to plot further depending on where the thread takes us. That said, the best way to reach me is through IMs or Discord (available on request). The only time I turn down plots is if I feel like it would put my character in an OOC situation, and I especially dislike my character being one-sidedly used as a tool to further another character’s development without anything being reciprocated (this happens often especially wrt my healer characters)

WHAT EXPECTATIONS DO YOU HOLD TOWARDS YOUR PLOTTING PARTNER: Communication is really important to me, especially with regards to comfort regarding certain plot elements, and approaching other in-character situations that might have multiple different solutions. I think it’s important that both characters involved get the same amount of development out of writing a thread, and I really hate the idea of being imbalanced as far as that goes (more on that below). That said, I’m always perfectly down to spitball plot ideas and tweak/refine other concepts because I really do enjoy plotting, it’s just super important to me that things are communicated clearly. I get extremely distressed and frustrated IRL if people just kinda throw stuff at me, and it often kills my muse.

WHEN YOU NOTICE THE PLOTTING IS RATHER ONE-SIDED, WHAT DO YOU DO?: I make an active effort to come up with plots that are engaging and beneficial fairly equally to both parties. I mentioned this above, but especially in the case of writing my healer characters, I have a huge disdain for characters being used as tools to further development while getting nothing substantial in return. That said, I try to be very aware of this in terms of a potential writing partner being on the receiving end. IMO it feels like shit, but I definitely don’t want to make someone else feel that way either. That said, so long as stuff is plotted out clearly and me and the writer are both okay with it, then it’s fine. COMMUNICATION IS KEY, BASICALLY.

HOW DO YOU USUALLY PLOT WITH OTHERS, DO YOU GIVE INPUT OR LEAVE MOST WORK TOWARDS YOUR PARTNER?: I kinda just like to throw spaghetti at the wall and whatever sticks, I’m down to fly with. I have a lot of ideas, but again, I like to give my partners the option of doing whatever they’re comfortable with, and h aving equal contribution opportunities.

WHEN A PARTNER DROPS THE THREAD, DO YOU WISH TO KNOW?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.

- AND WHY?: Everyone has their own circumstances, I really don’t mind. If it’s one I’ve been especially looking forward to, I might be bummed, but it’s no skin off my nose really.

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY LEAD YOU TO DROP A THREAD?: I don’t typically drop threads or abandon them during their writing. The only thing that would make me do so is offensive content, or huge plot elements being introduced that makes my character ooc and wasn’t previously discussed during plotting.

WILL YOU TELL YOUR PARTNER?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.

IS COMMUNICATION IN THE RPC IMPORTANT TO YOU? YES / NO.

-AND WHY?: I already feel like I need to take a lot of extra steps to understand others and be understood, and that isn’t something often reciprocated. In my experience, just honest communication is the quickest solution to issues that crop up during writing. For those who HAVE actually had me reach out to them in this way, I really do try to be polite and respectful while being straightforward so the situation can be resolved without any hurt feelings.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH ABSOLUTE HONESTY, EVEN IF IT MAY MEANS HEARING SOMETHING NEGATIVE ABOUT YOU AND/OR PORTRAYAL?: As long as it’s constructive, and not merely negativity, I welcome it. After all, I can’t fix a huge flaw in my writing without having an alternative solution. I’m open to accepting feedback and critique, especially wrt Meninas since my portrayal is quite a large departure from popular fanon perception (from those who choose to pay attention to her, lol), but I also thrive on suggested remedies and solutions to issues in my writing.

DO YOU THINK YOU CAN HANDLE SUCH SITUATION IN A MATURE WAY? YES / NO.

WHY DO YOU RP AGAIN, IS THERE A GOAL?: I like to tell stories, and I like to tell narratives that take root in emotional expression and how those feelings can act as a vehicle to the storytelling. I want to move people through feeling, because it can be a powerful experience. I use a lot of inspiration from themes in my other favorite series, as well as inspiration from my own personal experiences as well. I tend to pick characters who have one or two traits in common with myself, whether those be negative or positive. I’m very excited to share all the things I have planned for Meninas, as she’s certainly my most ambitious project to date.

WISHLIST, BE IT PLOTS OR SCENARIOS: For Meninas specifically, I want to interact with Squad 11 and Squad 9 during the CFYOW verse I have planned. Hisagi specifically would be interesting because of the clash of ideals, in addition to being the only other living person to be able to relate to the horror of being under Pepe’s thrall. I’d also like to steal Ikkaku’s bankai, and have more fight scenes. Lastly, Meninas doesn’t do much of anything in CFYOW, so more interactions with Mayuri and Squad 12 would be cool.

THEMES I WON’T EVER RP / EXPLORE: I don’t mind briefly referencing darker themes in my writing, especially wrt my own personal experiences, but I want to be very clear that I refuse to write at length or romanticize these themes. I refuse to write anything involving rape, homophobia, transphobia, racism, pedophilia, etc, with this in mind.

WHAT TYPE OF STARTERS DO YOU PREFER / DISLIKE, CAN’T WORK WITH?: Unless previously discussed, I struggle with starters that have a character pushing mine away. If the situation is super OOC for my character to be in, or frankly too mundane. In Meninas’ case, most domestic stuff is a snoozefest for me (but I LOVE this for other characters).

WHAT TYPE OF CHARACTERS CATCH YOUR INTEREST THE MOST?: *saoirse ronan voice* Women. UHHH but no, for real... I like fleshing out female characters quite a bit. Personality types are varied, but I like characters who have some level of nuance to their emotional expression whether it’s an internal or external struggle. I like powerful women too, and the exploration of “strength” as a theme (esp at the intersection of the theme of “femininity” and its expressions) whether this is external strength or internal fortitude. I think I play a wide variety of characters who have vastly different thoughts, beliefs, and forms of expression, but I try to find something in common with who I portray to act as a touch stone. I also like characters who have themes of “justice” and nuanced morality.

WHAT TYPE OF CHARACTERS CATCH YOUR INTEREST THE LEAST?: 99% of male characters. And I also hate tsunderes gjklsdjfd

WHAT ARE YOUR STRONG ASPECTS AS RP PARTNER?: I really like my writing style especially wrt using emotion to set a cinematic scene and overall tone. I think I’m really strong with conveying emotion, especially with things that are often unspoken. I try to communicate with partners clearly and establish rapports. I love writing headcanons and have a TON of plot ideas as well.

WHAT ARE YOUR WEAK ASPECTS AS RP PARTNER?: Oh I’m the slowest replier on the planet and I’m apparently intimidating lol

DO YOU RP SMUT?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.

DO YOU PREFER TO GO INTO DETAIL?: YES / NO / DEPENDS (i prefer to go into detail about sensations, rather than the actual acts as it comes off stifled and weirdly technical)

ARE YOU OKAY WITH BLACK CURTAIN?: YES / NO

- WHEN DO YOU RP SMUT? MORE OUT OF FUN OR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT?: Honestly I just do what Meninas tells me.

- ANYTHING YOU WOULD NOT WANT TO RP THERE?: Kink stuff is weird territory for me, absolutely gotta be discussed in private and comfort levels clearly established.

ARE SHIPS IMPORTANT TO YOU?: YES / NO. Relationships in general rule, and while I do have a romantic ship that plays a large part in Meninas’ plot, the romance comes secondary to the plot itself. I really enjoy writing and developing romances, but more than that I like establishing connections. I love the relationships I’ve got planned with Giselle, Candice, Liltotto, and Bambietta because there are going to be a LOT of drastically different things that inform my portrayal of Meninas coming from these relationships (both positive and negative, but ultimately places of growth).

WOULD YOU SAY YOUR BLOG IS SHIP-FOCUSED?: YES / NO. Like I said, plot comes first. And especially in the case of Meninas, she has a lot of self exploration and reflection to do before she can engage in a healthy relationship or address any feelings of romance. I do place a large focus on the formation of her relationships and how they shape the way she relates to other people and grows as a person, but I am extremely sensitive to making sure I’m not writing a female character who’s entire development is dependent on a romance with a male character- perish the thought lol.

DO YOU USE READ MORE?: YES / NO / SOMETIMES WHEN I WRITE LONG STUFF.

ARE YOU: MULTI-SHIP / SINGLE-SHIP / DUAL-SHIP — MULTIVERSE / Singleverse.

WHAT DO YOU LOVE TO EXPLORE THE MOST IN YOUR SHIPS?: For Meninas, it’s a matter of her acknowledging, understanding, and accepting that she can be worth more than how useful she is to others. She had a series of traumatizing and character defining experiences regarding love, romance, and personal worth that strongly shaped the way she perceives her relationships to others and her emotional expression. Trust is another huge factor for me, Meninas needs to be around someone she believes in. Strength is another aspect. She likes someone who challenges her, keeps her on her toes, and is sturdy like physically. Because she’ll break you. THAT SAID- Meninas tends to be open wrt her body, but closed off when it comes to her heart. Hate to see it, love to write it.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PRE-ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIPS?: YES / NO. As long as the premise makes sense. I like relationships to have some matter of significance and planning, especially because of how I’ve written the way Meninas picks and chooses who to get close to in Silbern depending on what suits her interests. Genuine friendship is a weird thing for Meninas, as most of her relationships are formed out of convenience. If you aren’t useful to Meninas’ schemeing, then she has no interest in dealing with you beyond platitudes and keeping up appearances and will interact with you as such.

► SECTION ABOUT YOUR MUSE.

- WHAT COULD POSSIBLY MAKE YOUR MUSE INTERESTING TOWARDS OTHERS, WHY SHOULD THEY RP WITH THIS PARTICULAR CHARACTER OF YOURS NOW, WHAT POSSIBLE PLOTS DO THEY OFFER?: WE LOVE DUPLICITOUS WOMEN! No, but at the core of my Meninas characterization, the sentiment is “Everything is not as it appears” even down to the relationships she has with others. Meninas’ entire personality is constructed as a survival tactic from an early age (in addition to being a way to make herself more useful as a tool to others, and thus seen as having more worth in general), and as a result, she hasn’t really allowed herself to live life as a fully realized person. Her plots generally offer silent rebellion, playing a role in regards to her self presentation, chaotic mean girl level bullshit, and cool fights/training. Also you get to interact with a big buff lady. That said about her personality, it depends on the verse. CFYOW Meninas will be more unhinged, while post-CFYOW Meninas will be more honest and rowdy.

- WITH WHAT TYPE OF MUSES DO YOU USUALLY STRUGGLE TO RP WITH?: Muses who are standoffish or disengage right at the start. Meninas doesn’t interact with people without a certain purpose, so if they aren’t interested, she’s not going to be either.

- WHAT DO THEY DESIRE, IS THEIR GOAL?: Revenge, strength, redefining what “power” means in terms of how the world works. She wants to see the Shinigami dead for their role in her parents deaths, and feels the same about Yhwach.

- WHAT CATCHES THEIR INTEREST FIRST WHEN MEETING SOMEONE NEW?: Ability, potential threat, perceived strength, where loyalty lies; how potentially useful you can be to her.

- WHAT DO THEY VALUE IN A PERSON?: Strength both in a physical sense, but also in belief and convictions. Honesty, and understanding the flaws of the world they live in.

- WHAT THEMES DO THEY LIKE TALKING ABOUT?: Fighting, beauty, freedom, abolishing Quincy classism based on blood purity, music, fashion, blacksmithing.

- WHICH THEMES BORE THEM?: Blind loyalty to Yhwach, talking about the horrors of war as if it doesn’t concern them, Bambietta, Quincy supremacy,

- DID THEY EVER WENT THROUGH SOMETHING TRAUMATIC?: Her parents were killed in the first Quincy war and she was left abandoned and grew up literally fighting for her life and living on the streets. She often likens fighting pits to the bowels of Hell (and I often play with the ironic theme of crawling out of hell to appear as an angel or something divine). She is consumed by a quest for revenge, and strongly believes her ends will justify the means taken to fulfill her ideal. As a direct result of these experiences, her emotional health and maturity is severely affected, and she doesn’t view herself as a person worthy or capable of feeling as much as a tool who, in the right hands, can be utilized to bring about the revenge she craves.

- WHAT COULD LEAD TO AN INSTANT KILL?: (1) Men who feel non-consensually entitled to her body. That said, she’s done a fairly excellent job at maintaining control and an unassuming threatening nature despite the widely known understanding of her Schrift ability and how it augments. (2) Someone touching her Quincy cross, as it’s her most precious and private item. (3) Anyone who dares get in the way of her plans that can’t be manipulated in some other useful aspect.

- IS THERE SOMEONE /-THING THEY HATE?: Meninas hates Yhwach, and the Shinigami most predominately, but she also harbors disgust for Hollows as an instinct. That said, her young life was spent detached from Quincy culture (in addition to being a Gemischt and the inherent isolation that comes with that status), so despite her early induction into the Wandenreich ranks, Meninas does not harbor the same Quincy nationalism and loyalty that others of her race do. They’re a means to an end, and just happen to help her become stronger.

IS YOUR MUSE EASY TO APPROACH?: YES / NO. - Best ways to approach them?: She comes off as easy to approach, but if you want genuine Meninas I’m sorry the number you’re trying to reach has been disconnected. Goodbye!

SOMETHING YOU MAY STILL WANT TO POINT OUT ABOUT YOUR MUSE?: Everything I’ve written about her is based in headcanon! I’ve got both a lengthy biography as well as headcanons gathered in the sidebar links on my blog.

CONGRATS!!! You managed it, now tag your mutuals! ♥

TAGGED BY: @bazzardburner TAGGING: i think this has made its rounds so steal it!

#MEME / ANSWERED #HANDS OF THE DIVINE ; A SELF MADE CREATION / HEADCANON #ok take 2 dont delete all my bolded shit pls

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gumceline · 5 years ago

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another massive bubbline shipper here too say i got mad respect for this blog. as much as i stand by my ship 1000%, i also stand by the fact its totally okay too ship them with other people. i admit the bubbline fandom can be pretty toxic, but alot of us will stand by you. not only are you being super respectful even when you get hate, but you arent straight washing. also the way you looked at the negative parts of our community with understanding in last post, that was real great

oh i appreciate it! I prefer never to judge an entire fanbase by one dude because EVERY fanbase has THOSE people, no fanbase is ever perfect.

I really wished my experience with bubbline shippers had been better, it really was unfortunate to have countless hate, to have people make posts mocking me, to be put on “Lists to block”, not to mention that i legit had supportive friends who were bubbline shippers, but they pretty much turned their back on me, abandoned me, and called me a “Homophobic uncaring asshole”.

It really broke my heart dealing with the stuff i did, and i wasn’t perfect either, but i still don’t think i deserved what that was. I was a kid at the time, and was still having fun and i REALLY wanted to be a part of the fanbase because i love the series and loved the characters, but the fandom just....hated me.

Because i was a multishipper and had different opinions on the characters.

It really didn’t matter to them that i also shipped the characters with other female characters, or i said myself i don’t consider them straight. Because the fandom didn’t really care, they took one look and decided nothing i said mattered.

Being in the star fandom is widely different because the biggest ship there is Starco, a MXF (Which i personally don’t really like but that’s just me), and my favorite ship was...and still is Tom and Marco, because i love their chemistry so much and i genuinely consider them to be a much more believable relationship then the romance they wrote for star and marco.

And trust me, it’s always annoying if you don’t ship the most popular ship and like another pairing more but are succumbed to it everywhere regardless of the characters themselves.

But me not shipping star and marco didn’t make me someone who hated straight people, so i don’t think it’s collectively fair to tell anyone who may of liked marcy or bonnie with finn or maybe they ship them with a male oc of theirs....hate lesbians or were just homophobic.

it’s Like if i took finn out of his (Maybe) relationship with huntress and shipped him with....Tiffany (Who is a male character)...that wouldn’t mean i suddenly hated all straight couples and think finntress should burn.

That’s still a huge leap to jump to and extremely dangerous because you’re collectively accusing someone of something serious without really knowing much more about them then “They like this ship”.

Without any knowledge of them outside of that.

You could effectively damage their rep and make their time in the fandom a living hell out of something minor or something you just assumed, i would know.

I welcome progress, i am quite happy for the bubbline shippers who got their ship, heck...i’m STILL mad that we didn’t get poly tom x marco x star on star vs and felt VERY baited by the crew on that.

but even though i am happy for those people, i don’t think it’s validation to beat up on other shippers either, it does nothing for anyone’s case to do that. If the people are actual bigots who are actively acting terrible and throwing around nasty words and doing terrible stuff, then by all means, call them out.

But people who are just causally shipping stuff for fun? In a way it just feels like using them being a gay ship as a weapon against everyone else, because if they disagree with you and have a different opinion you can effectively boil them down to a bigot and no one might question it...especially when it’s the vast majority.

And that should not be acceptable to do, i ended up hearing from a friend of mine that this fandom actively started purging out other creators for having opinions people didn’t like, and now people are starting to regret that they shunned out so many members of the fandom based on things that were probably incredibly trivial in the long run.

And i get it, it’s an important ship, but it’s important as a rep of that ship to be respectful to others, because if not what you’ll end up doing is turn people away. I would like to be more celebratory of your success in getting the ship canon, but it makes it harder if i’m getting several messages asking when i’m deleting my “Hateful” blog because bubbline was now canon.

I’d like to get along with and support these people, but they don’t want to try and support me and have almost just decided to hate me and it sucks, and there’s not much i can do. That’s why i am thankful for those who don’t just immediately decided to judge me and want to know more about my views on the characters.

This of course does not apply to the community as a whole, not everyone is acting like this, but it is a problem and it has consequences and i hope the fandom does work on it in the future. Please do better in the future.

Now when it comes to shipping, I have my limits personally, like if the characters have canon sexualities i tend to stick to those sexualities, i for one, have a oc that’s gay. I effectively tell others if they make fanart with him for fun that’s great and i love it, but i want his sexuality respected if ships are involved.

Since the AT ones are left in the air, it means i am left to come up with my own ideas, so that’s what i do. I think everyone should be allowed in that regard to have their own interpretations, marcy could be bi, lesbian, ace,pan, ect and all of those are perfectly acceptable headcanons.

i don’t think one should be held superior over another.

I’ve never looked at Marcy or PG and said “Oh yeah, these two are so obviously straight”, they’re about as straight as a bent nail. XD The people who say this stuff clearly don’t follow me to know that they’re not treated as straight here and i think that’s just frustrating because it’s attacking for completely incorrect information.

And the main problem i think i have, like the biggest issue, is i see the F&C characters differently.

Because i know where the fandom is getting this impression people who these other pairings are homophobic is coming from, it’s because most of the fandom doesn’t really see those characters as much more then well...GB characters.

If i saw tomco, and one was turned to a girl to avoid them both being boys, i would be annoyed, i would, i wouldn’t assume the person was homophobic without other evidence but i’d be annoyed. (I mean for all i know it could be an au and i could be mistaking the situation entirely)

What makes this different for me, is because for one, these aren’t fan-characters, the fans didn’t make a genderbent world and design these characters for fun or anything. These were show characters, that were in episodes and have their own comics and all that.

The way the show approached them for me, makes me feel like they’re kinda misjudged, and people don’t have to agree with me on that fact. But i just feel like between them being fanfiction characters ice king made up, the fact their canon is different, the fact the characters do things the F&J characters don’t do, i just can’t help but feel like treating them as if they were something fans did for fun and have no difference outside of their gender is not the right approach for them.

(I mean ice queen died in one comic and has her own unique origin story which is apparently tied to cake’s, flame prince apparently speaks cat and is the most nervous and awkward cutie I've ever seen, gumball is apparently a card wars superfan and legit takes it WAY too seriously, i just can’t really look at these characters and say “Oh, these are all just Ice King, Flame Princess, and Princess Bubblegum but the opposite gender”).

I feel like the show does enough with them,and had a unique enough approach, that i feel like they should be judged as different characters. Like the redraws of regular episodes with the F&C characters are cute but they’re for fun and probably not what ice king wrote for them in his weird stories.

Like i can’t imagine ice king knew PB so well he made sure gumball had her entire backstory and motivations.

And i feel like the people who do enjoy these ships, heck, ALL FOUR of these ships, feel the same way i do. I’m sure some could def be shipping them for the wrong reasons, but i can’t help but think it’s less about their gender and more that other people recognize they’re different and have considered the different dynamics...like they would if they were shipping any other pairing.

And people don’t have to agree with any of us on that, but i don’t think the alternative should be to accuse us of something so heavily either.

These days i have newer friends who like bubbline who are chill with me, and yeah that’s cool, and i personally don’t really draw the ship myself because i’m still not too comfortable in the AT fandom or with the community right now....the situation with it never leaves me feeling safe frankly.

But we get along, they’re lovely, and the shippers who like bubbline but support the blog are also lovely people and i adore them.

At the end of the day i just want to have fun, i’m fine being in a small subsection of the fanbase and who knows, maybe i have gotten people to think about the F&C characters in a new light, i’m not sure.

But i hope maybe at some point the fandom can chill down and we can support each other without turning it into...whatever that entire situation is. Because i don’t want to be fighting with that community and would prefer to get along with them, but only time will tell.

But thanks for the support! I wish you the best ! I sometimes still have a lot to learn but i hope throughout this whole thing I've gone about it as respectful as possible.

I love the show and all the characters and the fun ships and relationships, i hope someday in the future i can be comfortable enough to get back into the fandom as much as i used to be! ^-^

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shanix-the-stars · 4 years ago

Text

Worshipers of the Old

Kylo Ren x OC / Kylo Ren x Reader

Read on AO3

Summary: He arrived at the archive during the late hours of the night, searching for answers regarding a long lost Force ability. When AR-210 is assigned to help him, she would never have anticipated the strange and terrifying series of events that were to follow... and what it all meant for her.

*Written in first person; main character has feminine qualities, but doesn’t have any defining characteristics.

Chapter 1: A Healing World

Warnings: None

Word Count: 3,018

A/N: hello! thank you for taking the time to read my story! this is the first star wars fic i’ve written, so i hope it’s good enough for this wonderful, amazing community.

this story does not follow the movies’ timeline and is heavily based on lore and Legends material. i put my own twist on things so it’s not important to read/look at any background info on any of it. however, if you want to read more, i suggest visiting Wookieepedia (also a great source for inspiration).

please enjoy!

『ID: AR-210

Passcode: ******

Keyword: Lower Level Overview Report』

I press the enter key on my datapad before setting it down on my desk, letting the entry load as I run out to the main lobby. Thirty minutes remain, and we aren’t even ready. Dozens of faculty members and students are rushing back and forth, each carrying some sort of device or package in their hands. I make a beeline for the Director’s office, but a voice calls out behind me before I can rush inside.

“Ahré!”

I whip my head around, seeing the Director himself running in my direction. His graying hair is a mess, and I can tell that his wrinkles are, well, even more wrinkly than before. I can practically feel the stress radiating off of him once he stops in front of me. “D-Director Malobry, I was just about to-“

“Reassure me that all the holobooks on the fifth floor in the east wing are all finally organized and shelved?” He storms past me and slams his office door open. I quickly follow. “It’s hell out there, and if that damn General sees that we’re behind schedule for the third consecutive month, he’ll have my head on a platter.”

“I-I’m sure that won’t be the case, Director-“

He holds a hand up. “Ahré, please.” He takes a breath, clearly trying to calm himself down. He lowers his voice. “Is the east wing done or not?”

I open my mouth but almost immediately clamp it shut. I don’t have any good news, and truth be told, none of those holobooks are shelved.

The Director waits for me to give him an answer, but after a moment, it seems like I don’t need to. Still, I hand my head and close my eyes, uttering a soft "no" under my breath.

There’s a pause. He collapses back into his chair and runs a hand through his hair. “Shit.”

Guilt forms in the pit of my stomach. The fear of witnessing the General’s wrath invades my mind, but perhaps the Director’s anger might be more concerning for the moment. I wasn’t even the archivist assigned to that wing, but I know who was: Jolson. The thought of him being reprimanded—or worse—for the third time this month... I can feel my head swim with fear.

“Go help Jolson with that floor,” the Director says quietly. He’s already accepted his fate. “Make sure you get every droid working on those shelves. We might still have a chance.”

I’m surprised, but I make a point not to show it. I bow my head and exit the office, merging with the traffic of people busying about. Several droids are attending to other minuscule chores in other rooms, so I call on them to go to the east wing before rounding up a few other archivists as well.

I glance at the time on one of the walls, but I don’t give myself the time to process the numbers. I immediately look away and make my way to the fifth floor.

Just focus, Ahré.

Once I arrive, there is a frenzy of excitement and eagerness flowing in the room as piles of holobooks and scrolls are being carried from one end to the other. Half of the staff inside is working on the main lower shelves, while the other is up on the mezzanine. It’s a slightly relieving sight, but I try not to let that get my hopes up. The majority of the shelves are still empty.

“Ahré! Over here!”

I turn to see Jolson on the other side of the room, wearing a fresh new uniform and a pair of shoes. His usually messy black hair swept up into a bun, and I can tell he put a little more effort into today’s occasion. Still, he looks a little tired. I watch him jog over with a stack of new flimsiplast, a big smile painted on his face. I do my best to return it with a disapproving frown.

He raises an eyebrow. “What?”

“We have less than half an hour until the General arrives. He’s already at Aurora looking at things over there. And the Director knows about your...” I gesture to the entirety of the room. “...lack of shelving.”

“Malobry can go die in the pits of Kaon for all I care,” he huffs, walking toward one of the supply shelves. “Hope to the Force one of the scranges get to him before anything else does.”

I trail behind him, suppressing an eye roll. “I know the both of you don’t... get along. But can you please, at least for today, keep your head on your shoulders? If the General sees one thing out of place, what’s to stop him from getting rid of Malobry?”

“Come on, Ahré. You know as well as I do Hux doesn’t have anyone else to look over these libraries. Not after all that’s happened.” He sets the packets of flimsiplast down on the floor before pulling out his datapad. “Besides, the Supreme Leader personally appointed Malobry. I doubt the General would want to oppose him.”

He does have a point... but there’s been talk about infighting among the First Order, especially between the both of them. After Kylo Ren got rid of the former Supreme Leader, things have become rather tense. There seems to be a stricter hold on First Order regions and institutions; not to mention the seemingly never-ending war with the Resistance. However, that only meant escape from the Yuuzhan Vong for Obroa-skai, so I can only complain so much.

Jolson snaps his fingers in front of my face, bringing me back to attention. “Obroa-skai to Ahré, helloooo?”

I swat his hand away. “Sorry, just... thinking,” I say dumbly.

He chuckles. “Sure. Now, stop worrying and help me with sections eight, nine, and ten, okay? We’ll get it done.” He looks down at me, his big blue eyes full of reassurance. A sincere smile graces his lips. He knows how to calm me down, and as much as I hate it, it works. Although he tends to lag behind most faculty and staff, he can always be counted on to do one thing: be a friend.

I guess that’s all I can really ask from him.

The General arrives at the archives precisely on time. He is accompanied by a few other officers with identical uniforms, some of whom seem to care less about the visit. At the entrance remain at least a dozen stormtroopers with blasters gripped in their hands, while a couple of others follow behind the group of men.

Odd.

All of our staff members are lined across the lobby, everyone standing in attention as General Hux and his entourage make their way up to the Director and I. He surveys the lines, eyeing each and every one of us with a scrutinizing glare. I have to stop myself from squirming in my spot and pray to the beings above I look presentable enough. I can already feel a chill running down my spine.

“Very well,” he finally says. He turns to Malobry. “I trust that work on Celebratus has ceased, Director.”

He nods. “Yes, General. We have been working tirelessly on the facility. The east and west wings are complete, as well as the lower levels.”

There’s a hum of approval. “Excellent. The Medical Director at Aurora has reported that there haven’t been any border attacks there as of late, so I believe the situation to be corresponding with this sector?”

“That would be correct,” Malobry confirms. I glance up at him, seeing a thin layer of sweat coating his forehead and neck. Poor guy.

General Hux turns back to the staff, giving them a final once-over before nodding. “You are all dismissed.”

They bow their heads quickly and head out in different directions of the archive. I catch a glimpse of Jolson, seeing him send me a playful wink my way. Warmth blooms in my chest at the small gesture.

“AR-210.”

I snap back into position. “Y-Yes, General?”

“The Supreme Leader is planning a visit later today. Seeing as you are the head clerk for the archive, I believe you could aid him with something he needs.”

My brows furrow together. Need? What in the galaxy would the leader of the First Order possibly need from here?

I manage a semi-nod, but it feels more like a confused tilt of the head instead. I’m sure I look oblivious, but I can’t help but feel like I am. Perhaps I’m missing something. “Of course. May I ask what he is looking for?”

The General scoffs. “He wouldn’t tell me,” he says, a hint of irritation laced in his words. “But I doubt it’s of much importance. Our own records and archives weren’t sufficient enough for his... research projects. He insisted on coming to Obroa-skai.”

My head is swimming with a thousand questions, none of them actually verbalized. Instead, I relax my features and bow my head. “I’d be happy to help, General.”

“Good. Now, Director, if you could show us around the facility, we will be on our way soon.”

I’ve never seen Malobry move faster. “Yes, yes, of course. Please, gentlemen, if you could follow me...”

Within ten seconds, they round a corner and disappear from view. I’m left standing in the lobby with the feeling of nothing but dread in the pit of my stomach. Now I’m the one sweating. There isn’t even a hint of comfort anywhere nearby, just a receptionist desk on the other side of the room. Stormtroopers still stand outside the entrance, perfectly still and ready at a moment’s notice. I decide to step away into my own office and wait there instead. It doesn’t help.

I grab my datapad and scroll through the entry I loaded up earlier. The words are a blur on the screen as I try to read, but it’s useless. Fear grips at my mind. Something about this doesn’t feel right. The Supreme Leader... in need of help with information he can’t already acquire? I sigh and sit down at my desk, letting my thoughts drown in stress.

Hours pass and no Kylo Ren. The General has already left, as well as half the stormtroopers that had initially arrived. The remaining still stand outside. My nerves have somewhat calmed down, but what remains is worry. Perhaps, to someone above, this may just be some sort of punishment for me. For what reason, I do not know, nor do I think it matters at this point.

A knock at my door nearly sends my heart over the point of no return. I get up, composing myself as I make my way to open it. The anxiety kicks back in, and for a moment I begin to feel nauseous. This could be it—the defining moment of whether or not I get to live another day. Would one slip-up ensure my demise? Would he really go that far? What if I can’t find what he’s looking for? I force my thoughts aside and slide the door open, relieved to see that it’s only Jolson. His eyes widen once they meet mine. “Ahré? Are you alright?”

“Jolson.” I let out a shaky breath. “Thank the stars. And no, no, I’m not alright,” I reply blatantly. He waits on me to elaborate, his worry turning into confusion.

“Well... what’s going on?”

I peek out into the corridor to make sure nobody else is present before pulling him into my office. “Sit,” I command, gesturing to the chair in the corner. He obliges, but the concerned expression he wears doesn’t waver for a second.

I slam the door shut. “The Supreme Leader is coming to the archive later,” I begin, walking behind my desk. “Apparently he needs help finding something.”

“Okay,” Jolson starts, hesitant. “What does he need from here?”

“That’s just it. I asked the General the same question, but even he didn’t know.” I fall back into my chair. “I also don’t know when he’s coming. He could be walking through the front doors right now. Maybe he is, and I’m just back here panicking. He’s going to think I’m terrified of him, which I’m sure he already knows, but it’s just going to—“

“Ahré,” Jolson interrupts, tone firm and deep. I shut my mouth immediately. “Why are you worrying so much? You shouldn’t be.”

I huff. “Why not? It’s the Supreme Leader-“

“Who is coming here specifically for help, Ahré.”

I pause, taken aback. He’s coming here... for help. For help.

Jolson’s features smooth out into a tired smile, no doubt exhausted after today’s near-disaster. I take a moment to look at him, really look at him, and see dark circles under his eyes. I suddenly forget about the Supreme Leader.

“Have you been taking care of yourself, Jolson?” I ask, my tone sounding perhaps a little more accusing than intended. “You look tired.”

He stands, chuckling as if amused, and extends an arm out towards me. I walk over. He wraps his arm around my shoulders, squeezing me gently. “I am,” he says. “But you’re anxiety over this whole thing might be tiring me out even more.”

I glare at him.

“I’m joking.”

We walk out into the main lobby. A few librarians and archivists are leaving for the night—no doubt heading out to the bar—while others are coming in for their shifts. Malobry is talking to Vess, one of our receptionists, with a bright smile I haven’t seen in months. The weight of today’s visit has been finally lifted off of our shoulders. We probably won’t have to worry about another inspection for a year or two. I only wish I could celebrate with the others.

Jolson stops for a moment, turning to face me. “You’re going to be fine,” he reassures once again. “Remember, he’s the one who needs your help. No need to get overwhelmed.”

His eyes bore into mine, and all I can do is nod.

He pats my arm softly before heading for the doors. I watch as he slaps Malobry’s back forcefully as he walks by, earning him a near disgusted look from the elder. He too heads out for the night a moment later.

The clock reads 25:00, and I decide whether to go back to my office and wait or just go home. General Hux did say that the Supreme Leader would be coming today... there’s still an hour left. I’ll wait until then.

I walk up the receptionist's desk, replaying Jolson’s words in my head. He’s right. There’s no need to get worked up about it. I know what I’m doing. This has been my job for the last five years, after all... I’m allowed to feel confident.

“Hey, Vess,” I greet with a warm smile. She looks up from the datapad in her hands, immediately returning my smile with her own.

“Ahré, oh my goodness! How are you? How was the inspection today? I heard that Jolson almost didn’t get his level of the east wing finished on time, and that the General asked you to help the Supreme Leader with something, and that Malobry almost passed out. Oh! Is it true that...” She speaks at a pace I can hardly keep up with, but I let her go on. Her golden curls bounce excitedly at the news of today’s events, and I almost feel bad that she has the late shift this month. It’s clear that she likes to stay in the loop.

“Everything is great,” I say once she’s done. “And yes, it was pretty busy today, but also kind of scary.”

“Oh, I’m sure! After all of that? I wish I could have seen it!” She leans back in her chair dramatically, bringing a hand up to her forehead with a swoon. “You are so lucky, Ahré.”

If only.

I giggle and shake my head. “Hey, I’m going to be in the fifth library study on the second floor until the Supreme Leader arrives. If you could direct him there when he comes, that would be great.”

She nods eagerly. “Of course! Absolutely no problem! Have fun!”

I thank her and go back to my office to grab my datapad before making my way up to the second floor. It’s quiet in this part of the building. No students, no faculty or staff... just the low hum of the heater and a couple of droids finishing up their work. It’s the perfect place to relax at this hour. I enter the study and climb up to the mezzanine. There’s an alcove in the back, a small armchair and lamp occupying the space. It looks so inviting, I have to stop myself from running over and laying down for a nap. Out of the couple thousand study rooms, this is by far my favorite.

I pass by a window that looks far out to the border, stopping for a second to watch the red blinking lights on the gate. On the other side lies a frozen wasteland, filled with nothing except what remains of the Yuuzhan Vong. Their arrival to Obroa-skai two years ago was anything but expected, and before we all knew it, they had destroyed much of the planet’s life within the span of a few months. It wasn’t until the First Order caught wind of the invasion did they come. They were able to wipe away a majority of the enemy rather quickly. Since then, we’ve all been trying our best to return to a sense of normalcy... but even now, that reality seems to be illusive as ever.

I tear my eyes away from the view and sit down in the armchair. The anxiety I’ve held back for the last few minutes settles in once again, and this time it just feels a little more real. I run my fingers across my datapad in an attempt to distract my nerves but to no avail. I turn it on and see the lower level report, still open and ready for me to read.

I skim through the subheadings: field reports in need of filing... more software malfunctions... registering new reference codes... Nothing out of the ordinary. Again. I sigh and begin to read from the top.

About a half-hour later, I hear the door open on the other side of the room.

#kylo ren x oc #kylo ren x reader #star wars #star wars legends #kylo ren fanfiction #star wars fanfiction #kylo ren fluff #reader insert #worshipers of the old #shanix writes #kylo ren

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biasedwriting · 6 years ago

Text

Expectations [VIXX, Leo] ii

gif credits

Characters : VIXX’s Leo || OC

Genre : Slice of life, romance, college au, jock!taekwoon

This was a writing challenge put forth by @animeotakupooh /@vixxscifiwritings to write a jock!Taekwoon AU. But since I’ve had very different experiences with the so-called “jocks”, it just became this.

Lots of this stuff is based off real-life college experience; I hope that it gives you college going readers some comfort or something that is just relatable.

Thanks @taekcoon and @yixingminseokjongdae and @tomatoholmes for listening to me rant about this. I appreciate you guys being there for me!

This is part two of the whole mess and I’m currently working on part three.

Feedback is always loved.

Updates will be infrequent since I’m travelling.

The incidents of the night had been brushed away as drunken affection. Minah had had such experiences with some of the drunk entrants to her apartment building. While these were mostly female, Minah realized how little physical affection she had been exposed to growing up and that she didn’t know how to react to such situations except to gape into space till her brain switched back from the buzz of white noise to some semblance of normalcy.

Minah’s brain was thrown back to momentary confusion when Taekwoon approached her in class. Haneul looked equally confused when she heard Taekwoon’s soft voice calling Minah’s name and Minah’s entire frame going frigid.

“You dropped your student id in my car.” he said, handing her the small plastic card while Haneul shot her a look. While Minah had briefed her about the happenings from the weekend (and Haneul had successfully strangled Hongbin for abandoning Minah) she wasn’t entirely sure of what to make of the weird atmosphere between the two.

“Oh, uh. Thanks!” Minah replied, feeling some of the stares of her classmates. Something about what Taekwoon had said back on Saturday had deeply unsettled her. Kang was being an absolute prick to Taekwoon for no particular reason except for the fact that she thought him incapable. She reached out to take the card from him beforet taking a deep breath “why don’t you sit here?” she asked, pointing to the empty seat beside her causing several eyebrows to shoot up. Taekwoon regarded her silently before slipping into the seat and opening his laptop.

“Email id?” Minah whispered as Professor Kang made her entry. She eyed Taekwoon’s new position in the second row with suspicion before turning to set up the system. He quickly whispered his email id to Minah whose fingers quickly flew over the keyboard of her laptop. Taekwoon’s email notification alerted him of the arrival of a new email which he tried to hush by initially waving frantically at his laptop and then hitting the mute button.

He clicked open the notification to see Minah’s name on the screen with “Myths and Folklore Notes - Invitation to Edit” written on it. Taekwoon turned to briefly look at Minah who was looking straight ahead at Kang. He clicked open the Doc to see bulleted notes for all the readings, simplified and occasionally humourous. The chat window opened on the doc.

“Today we’re talking about Frazer’s theory of Myth Ritual. Don’t get too daunted, the general premise is that people had certain traditions (magical rituals) which they used to explain nature, this evolved into myths to justify the ritual. He goes on to say that myth then evolves into religion which is then refuted by science which is the evolution of the same.”

“Got it.” Taekwoon typed back “Thanks ^_^.”

Minah held back a giggle. Jung Taekwoon used cute emojis.

“So Taekwoon, what do you understand of what Frazer has to say? ” Kang’s voice was directed at Taekwoon whose eyes widened momentarily before he took a deep breath eyes fixing themselves on the screen in front of him. The little bar flashed next to the words that appeared with Minah’s fingers gliding over the keyboard.

“You’ve got this.”

“Well, he said that myths were used to explain rituals and justify them which in general was in relation to nature. But I was wondering if this could be applicable in a situation not based on this ‘natural law’ he speaks of? Like, what about rituals not based in nature?” Taekwoon processed and thought out loud. Minah could feel a swell of pride surge through her chest.

Kang gaped at the silver-haired man for a few seconds before recovering and clearing her throat “uh, yes, we’ll be covering that in this class.”

Taekwoon glanced at Minah who was beaming. All of the sudden, going to Kang’s class didn’t feel so terrible. He looked back at the screen which was quickly filling up with notes. The little message on the chat made him smile. He was going to be okay.

“I am not okay, what is this paper?!” he groaned as Minah hissed at him to be silent in the library. He had taken to sitting in her vicinity to ensure that he wasn’t entirely screwing up his papers. He waved the reading over his head, leaning closer to her “can you please tell me who this Melonpiss is and why his name is that?”

“I can’t help you with this one! We all had to choose different topics!” Minah groaned “plus we have a general body meeting in like half an hour for the fest, so get as much of it done as possible. Use JSTOR and Google Scholar and put in the bits you DO understand. Kang may be a bitch, but she appreciates effort.” while Taekwoon depended on her to make sense of the readings, she was happy to see that he was an attentive listener and grasped concepts quickly. Given the right push, he could easily tackle one of the readings on his own. She smiled softly to herself, Taekwoon may have been labelled a jock, but he didn’t really fit the trope. He was redefining the term for her.

Taekwoon grunted before turning back to his laptop. This was the second time he had to skip gym in his whole course at the university to finish a paper and both times it was for Kang’s course. With the college fest coming up, there was no way he could keep up with the no gym, no sports regime. Plus with his new position as head of soccer for the fest, he’d have to sit down and make calls to other university representatives to invite them for the fest. He looked at Minah from the corner of his eye, there was no way she was the type to take part in the fest, it involved sports and cultural events neither of which Taekwoon had seen her take part in. But since she had mentioned the general body meeting, maybe she was taking part in some weird event.

He casually switched between tabs to watch the livestream of a regional soccer match. Fuck, he had to go for the basketball team practices as well. He sighed.

“Taekwoon,” he heard Minah’s voice calling and he turned to see her still busily typing away “get away from the soccer tab and finish the paper. You have a weird look in your eye.”

It was funny how they had picked up on each other’s odd habits from just sitting close to each other. Taekwoon found it strange that a few months back, he had no idea who this person was. Minah was decidedly not someone of major consequence so to speak. Not a lot of people knew her except for members of the music club or people who shared courses with her. She was definitely not a part of the crowd he usually hung around with, but he quite enjoyed her company.

Taekwoon blinked, quickly switching tabs, trying to ignore the giggle that left her lips. Minah checked her phone and sighed, stretching out before shutting her laptop and getting up. Haneul and Wonshik joined her from the mezzanine floor with the isolated cubicles with grins on their kiss swollen lips. Clearly movie date night had gone of pretty well. Taekwoon shook his head, shutting his own device down and heading out of the library.

The general body meeting, from all of Taekwoon’s experience was always chaotic as hell. Having so many people crammed in a single room was bound to make it noisy. Sober Taekwoon did not like noisy in any shape or form. He cringed when he entered the hot room, grinning when he saw Joonmyeon and Himchan standing up front. Hakyeon was handling all cultural events and Doojun was handling the sports events. Joonmyeon was the chairman of the fest. Doojun bumped into Taekwoon’s side with a giant grin.

“Yo you fucker, are you ready to trash our rivals this year?”

“Of course.” Taekwoon rolled his eyes as Doojun thumped his back. Joonmyeon blew into the microphone for silence. Taekwoon busied himself with his mobile phone, checking the score for the matches he had been watching before. Minhyuk, who had just appeared, peered into the screen and grunted approvingly.

“Great match man.”

“Yea-”

“Could I please have the head of soccer here! We need the rest of the soccer department to join him!” Joonmyeon called out, causing Taekwoon to hastily shove his phone into his pocket and saunter forwards.

“Each team will be assigned a person from the registrations team who will assist you in your calls to teams outside the uni. Once you’ve noted down the people on your team, head over to Sooyeon who’ll tell you the person who you’ve been assigned.” Hakyeon instructed as Taekwoon blankly stared at the group of admiring eyes that had surrounded him. Pulling his phone out, he grunted to them to give him their names and email ids. The whole process took him about twenty minutes before he told them to disperse and headed over to Sooyeon who was known to be a tough nut on the campus (other than being Lee Jaehwan’s girlfriend). With her strong communication skills, there was no wonder she was heading the registrations department since they would be the point of contact for most of the incoming players and participants.

“Uh, Sooyeon,” he called for her attention as she spun around to look at him “registrations incharge for soccer?”

“Oh! Hold on!” she said, scrolling through her phone “I’ve assigned you Kim Minah, since you have a giant team to help and you have experience, I thought it would be best I assign her. She’ll have enough time to juggle between heading the creative writing event and doing registrations for soccer as well.”

“Sooyeon, so I might go missing from the registrations tent every now and then, I just got selected for the tennis team. Also which department did you pair me with?” Minah piped up from behind Taekwoon.

“That’s fine,” Sooyeon called to Minah before turning back to Taekwoon “Taekwoon, this is the registrations member I’ve assigned you with. Since we already have a database for phone calls and emails, you can start making them as soon as possible. Minah, you’re helping the soccer team out since they need the least manpower.”

“Oh?” Minah turned to Taekwoon and he shrugged.

“Help me with the paper while you help me make calls?”

“Fuck right off.” she grumbled as he grinned.

“I’ll get the team together to make calls on Thursday.”

“Sure, I have tennis practice for an hour from 5. So does 6:30 sound okay?” Minah asked in a business-like tone. Taekwoon looked at her for a moment. He had never really thought about Minah actually playing a sport, let alone tennis. But something about it fit.

“Uh, yeah.” he replied.

“Alright then, I have to talk to my team, so I’ll see you.” she replied, hurrying to the two people standing and waiting for instructions from her. Taekwoon’s gaze followed her before being distracted by Minhyuk asking him for a treat for being made the head of soccer. Shoving him with a grin he asked him to “go eat at the cafeteria.”

Acoustic night was surprisingly a success. Minah smiled to herself as the crowd of college students dispersed slowly leaving behind the dewy lawn with mattresses and bedsheets Minah had borrowed from the staff for this very purpose. Wonshik and Jaehwan were helping return all the sound and light equipment to the facilities manager. Haneul had carried away the fairylights they had had installed for the evening and now Minah was left smiling at the empty lawn, deeply satisfied with her work. The evening was chilly and she had to get to picking up the sheets to return them. Even though there were clouds in the sky, you could see stars and the moon shone on the damp grass. She sighed, leaning down to pick up a colourful sheet, probably from the lost and found donated graciously to her by the facilities staff. She shook it to get the grass off before folding it. It was a slow monotonous process, but she got done with half the sheets before wondering where the fuck the rest of her team was.

“Why didn’t you sing?” a soft voice caused her to jump and nearly drop the folded sheets in her hands. She spun to spot Taekwoon now picking up a sheet hidden somewhere far in the corner before looking up to meet her eyes “you sing, I saw you sing at the freshers talent night, why don’t you sing anymore?”

Minah sighed, dropping a bunch of sheets in a stack “stage fright. Besides, there are way better singers than me, it’s better promoting them.” she hurried over the large expanse of the lawn to find another sheet thrown haphazardly.

“I’m surprised you have stage fright,” Taekwoon said, dumping a set of sheet on the stack Minah had created “I thought you sounded good on talent night.”

“You don’t even remember talent night.” Minah laughed slumping down heavily on the last open sheet beside the pile of sheets, exhausted by all running back and forth. Taekwoon dropped the last sheet on her head making her exclaim as he took a seat beside her.

“You sang a song in both Korean and English, I thought it was pretty impressive.”

“So you do remember,” Minah sighed, face colouring at the memory of her having so many audio issues and spending most of the week beating herself up for sounding terrible “how come you came for acoustic night, thought you had practice.”

“Yeah,” Taekwoon sighed, leaning back “ I did, we broke early so we could come for acoustic night. I hit the gym in the morning since Wonshik said he might need my help with the sound systems in the evening.”

“Thanks,” Minah smiled at the stars, exhaustion getting stronger as she groaned out “last favour, do you mind if I lean against you? I’m so fucking exhausted.”

Taekwoon turned and Minah gaped at his back “rest your back against mine, it’s more comfortable.” Taekwoon said, looking at the sky, hearing her exhale heavily before feeling the warmth of her back resting against his. The crickets were loud as the moonlight shone on the two of them. “So, stage fright.” Taekwoon began making her chuckle, a pleasant sensation rumbling against his back. He decided he quite liked her laugh.

“Long story.”

“I have all night.” he replied picking at the frayed end of the bedsheet.

“Till curfew.” she corrected, twirling the damp grass between her fingers.

“Till curfew.”

Minah glared at Taekwoon as he tried to avoid her gaze. It was 7:30 on Thursday and not one member of his twenty member team had turned up to make phone calls. Now here they were with a giant database to make calls from and little to no help to do it.

“You have a shitty team.” she grumbled, spinning the tiny mobile phone which had been bought for the very purpose of these calls. They had made about forty calls in the last hour and while a few were hits, many were misses. What made it even worse was that both of them hated making phone calls.

“I know, I know. I'll buy you dinner to make it up to you.” Taekwoon offered as she shook her head.

“There's really nothing to make up. I don’t mind.” she shrugged, slumping forward onto her laptop. Taekwoon shook his head before reaching across the table to pat the top of her head.

“Coffee?”

“You spoke the magic words.” her voice was muffled, making him laugh.

“So I can treat you to coffee?” he asked, making Minah look up.

“Oh I thought you were going to be gallant and use your energy to run and get me some coffee,” she chuckled “that sounds great. You can buy me a coffee for every paper of yours I’ve had to go through.”

“They weren’t so many!” he whined, amusing her no end as she stood up.

“Alright alright, I’ll pay for my coffee.”

“That’s not what I meant!” he grumbled, standing up and following her out of the library. Spring was nearly upon campus and the weather was fine. Minah wasn’t entirely sure as to what to make of Taekwoon’s behaviour. This was definitely not expected, especially when she could feel all the eyes on them as they walked across the campus and entered the cafe.

“Yo Taekwoon…” Minhyuk, who had been lounging in the cafe began greeting Taekwoon but paused at Minah’s appearance before raising his eyebrow at Taekwoon.

“Minhyuk, you didn’t turn up for registration calls. We were stuck calling dimwits.” Taekwoon threw a sugar sachet at him, ignoring the look as Minhyuk’s suspicion subsided and he smirked at Minah. “What will you have?” Taekwoon called to Minah as Minhyuk furiously typed away at his mobile phone, Minah peeled her eyes away from the suspicious behaviour.

“Just an espresso.” she mumbled making Taekwoon narrow his eyes.

“Are you really ordering the cheapest drink here because I’m paying?”

“I’m ordering it because I happen to like espressos,” Minah laughed as Taekwoon ordered a latte “unlike weak people who need copious amounts of milk in their coffee.”

“Shut up, this is probably why you’re so short. You don’t drink enough milk.”

“No Taekwoon, this is called genetics.” Minah rolled her eyes, taking the coffee from him before heading to a seat to settle in. Taekwoon knocked Minhyuk on the head before taking the seat beside Minah.

“How many calls left?”

“About forty, after we go through the first round of calls and then some more registrations, you’ll have to make the second round of calls.”

“Fuck.” Taekwoon groaned, considered the fact that his team would not show up.

“Yeah, that. Plus I have to make my own calls for the Writing event, so I’m hoping your team turns up, or I’m going to ask to be reassigned.” she shot him a wicked grin.

“You know I will trouble you in class right? I’ll talk to Sooyeon so you can’t be reassigned,” Taekwoon retorted, taking a deep sip of his coffee before turning to Minhyuk “you heard her, the team needs to assemble tomorrow for calls. No excuses. If people don’t turn up, they’re off the team.” he instructed, taking his phone out and typing out a message on the group. He looked at Minah who gazed out of the window, the heat of the espresso fogged her glasses momentarily.

“Ye ye, we’ll be there.” Minhyuk grinned at Taekwoon who grinned back.

“You’d better be.” he paused turning to Minah “wait, do we have a reading for Kang’s class tomorrow?”

“No, we don’t. Which is why I agreed to making calls today.” she looked at her phone and cursed “fuck, I need to head for my meeting. Thanks for this Taekwoon, I’ll see you tomorrow?” she said, downing her coffee and scalding her tongue in the process.

“Wait, I don’t have your number!” he called her back and she frowned.

“You wanted my number?”

“Yeah, it’s easier to just arrange meetings and stuff. Plus I was told to add the registrations rep to the football team group.” he explained, and Minah nodded holding her hand out for his phone and punching in her digits before calling herself and hanging up.

“There you go, see you around.” she smiled, hurrying out.

Taekwoon grinned at his phone as he leaned back in his seat.

Taekwoon chuckled when the first message came “I swear if you call me in the middle of the night to help you out with Kang’s papers, I will not answer and I will leave you to die in her class..”

“Animal memes?”

“I’m always game for animals and memes.”

Minhyuk did not miss the looks, and couldn’t help but wonder why Taekwoon and Minah seemed closer than people just working together for the fest.

Which was one of the reasons why Minah was a little confused at the curious stares of the rest of the team when she arrived to make calls. All twenty of the members seemed to be analysing her from top to bottom, making her incredibly uncomfortable as she settled down and pulled her laptop out. She looked around to search for Taekwoon who was missing and she sighed. She missed having him around her, a thought which surprised her.

“Right, so I’ve shared the database with you. We need to make calls to the last forty on the list. Those who confirm get highlighted in green, those who don’t in red, and those who are not sure in yellow. If there are people whose names have previously been highlighted in yellow, call them back and re-check. I’ll draft the email you’ll need to send out from your committee to those who have confirmed. So please divide yourselves accordingly.”

There was a silence between the group as they stared at her like she was speaking in a foreign language. Some showed a sense of defiance making Minah sigh and rolled her eyes before getting to her work. She paused when an all too familiar scent hovered behind her, placing a small cup beside her laptop. Minah could feel her cheeks involuntarily heat up and hoped to god that it wasn’t very apparent.

“Espresso.I’m assuming you’re coming from practice.” he said nonchalantly looking over the rest of the group. Minah was hyper aware of how everyone was looking at Taekwoon giving her a cup of coffee “are you guys not working?” he asked the rest who seemed to snap back to reality and quickly get down to making calls.

“Taekwoon,” Doojun began, hovering close to Taekwoon, before exchanging a look with Minhyuk “remember that chick from the party at Jaehyun’s place? Been hounding me for your number after that night.”

“It’s odd when you say hounding. Either way, I’m currently not interested in anything.” Taekwoon replied, looking over the database on one of the laptops.

“What, has Kang’s course killed your libido? Don’t tell me you’re turning into one of them” Doojun pointed his thumb at Minah while gaping at Taekwoon, horrified. Taekwoon frowned.

“If by that you mean that he’s getting academically inclined, then that is definitely the case. Taekwoon is turning into an all-rounder, intelligent on and off the field.” Minah replied, eyes still fixed on the screen as she put the finishing touches on her email.

“I really didn’t ask you…” Doojun began as Taekwoon glared at him, gripping his arm.

“Enough Doojun.”

“See, instead of surreptitiously pointing and assessing whether I’m worthy of being around your captain, you could just tell me to my face that you’d rather have him satisfying his libido with anyone who would have him than simply spending time with me to get through his course. Sorry I don’t meet your beauty standards, unfortunately for you I’m not a dimwit who misses your gorilla signals. Give him a break, let him make decisions about his friends on his own.I think he’s fucking smart enough to do that.” Minah stood up, a little shorter than Doojun as she glared at him and Taekwoon could see Doojun physically shrink as he stepped away from her.

“Minah,” Taekwoon began as she turned to him, slightly red in the face.

“Sorry, I’m just sick of people acting like the only thing you live for is sports and sex. I’m sure there’s more substance to you than that. Anyway, those were my two cents, I’ve shared the doc with the email with you. If you need me to send them out, I can do that as well.”

“Fucking hell she’s scary.” Minhyuk mumbled as Taekwoon placated Minah and sat down beside her to go through the email.

“Is it odd that I find it a wee bit attractive?” Jaemin, a first year student seated beside him asked.

“It just means you’re fucked in the head. Taekwoon needs more...enticement, he’ll nail some chick who comes in during or after the fest, you’ll see. He won't last long on this friendship bullshit. Especially when it looks like that and is boring as hell.”

“Taekwoon, you need to focus. We need to get these presentations done and you need to do your damn part.” Haneul grumbled glared at Minah who sheepishly smiled. Kang’s classes always involved one group presentation and Taekwoon had begged Minah and Haneul to team up with him so he wouldn’t royally be screwed.

Except when they actually got down to working, he seemed terribly distracted, causing a great deal of aggravation for his teammates.

“Sorry, I woke up late and missed breakfast and now the whole day is messed up for me.” he grumbled, truly trying to look back at the points he had come for a comparative analysis of Persian and Greek myths. Minah let out a snort, momentarily distracting him again.

“I’ll wake you up in time for breakfast since your soccer team practices are going on till late night. But you really need to focus right now. Your main task is to summarize and smile. Kang likes your pretty face now that you’re speaking up in class. We’ll use it to our advantage.”

“Are you objectifying me?” Taekwoon narrowed his eyes.

“Yes, for a reasonable group grade. Which you will share. Plus take the compliment, I’m calling you attractive.” Minah smiled so brightly at him that he was momentarily stumped. He sighed turning back to the screen, his stomach rumbling as he scanned the document shared between the three of them. He couldn’t wait for this course to end, but he wasn’t so sure when Minah grinned at him, nudging him as she placed a meme about Zeus in the powerpoint presentation.

The two joined their chairs when they switched to his laptop (clearly the superior one) to finalize the presentation details. She leaned her head against his shoulder comfortably so Haneul could peer at the screen from behind.

“Shift the picture to the left.” Haneul nodded as Taekwoon dutifully moved the image destroying the layout in the process.

“Fuck this.” he grumbled as Minah chuckled and he could feel the movement against him. He tried once again succeeding after several tries. Minah cheered, shifting to stand.

“Finally, I have two shifts at the registrations desk today. I thought I’d never make it.” she said, patting Haneul’s back, looking at Taekwoon. Joonmyeon had come up with the idea of the college holding a concert to draw attention to the university as a means of promoting the college fest. Which meant that there would be a registration desk and the team needed to man it. Sooyeon had broken up the concert hours into shifts so the team could get work done while enjoying the concert as well. Joonmyeon and Hakyeon had gotten a popular indie group to play for a reasonable price and tickets were being circulated around the city as well as within the campus.

“Oh yeah, fuck, I was going to go check out the food stalls too. Heard that Myun managed to get that gourmet pizza dude.” Taekwoon remembered absently as Haneul nodded.

“My shift is first, then I’m going to hit the food stalls. Need to get my face in place. ” she said, stretching as she stood up and headed out of the library.

“I guess we’re mostly done here, I’m going to head to the desk and see if they need any help there. I’ll see you around then?” Minah patted Taekwoon’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I’ll hit the gym, take a shower and head for the concert. Text me when it begins, or if you need pizza during your shift. When do you get done though?” he replied, yawning and shutting his own laptop. Minah smiled, ruffling his hair.

“Thank you, I’d appreciate that, I should be done at around 8 or 8:15.” she smiled, waiting for Taekwoon to pack his stuff up to leave. They parted at the entrance of the library as Minah hurried to the concert location. There wasn’t very much to be done, posters needed to be put up and the team was given a general briefing of what they needed to be selling to the visitors. She ended up being trapped there for the first shift, her loose t-shirt and jeans and haggard face attracting zero registrations.

Minah hurried back to the room noting the open windows of the gym on the way. Minah’s eyes quickly took in the vision of Taekwoon lifting weights, mind focused entirely on his posture, his muscular arms flexing making her her mouth go slightly dry.

Minah realized she was gaping and shook her head and hurried back to the room. On entering, she took a deep breath and sat down on her bed, picking up her phone to take a look at the time. Maybe she could conduct a social experiment, a simple one with very known results. She grinned, standing up whilst stripping her shirt off and stepping into the bathroom.

Minah stood at the registrations desk with a smile, she’d gotten eight registrations so far and she had to marvel at the magic of a little red lipstick and a tight black t-shirt. But she could feel herself getting increasingly uncomfortable when one particular man got increasingly persistent.

“You never told me there was a b-boying event! Why didn’t you tell me?” he rambled on, it was his second time by the desk and Minah was now simply getting creeped out.

“It’ll all on the brochure, I couldn’t explain all forty events to you.” she explained “but if you sign up on the sign up sheet there, you’ll be emailed all the details.”

“Why don’t you give me your number?” he smirked as Minah cringed, but tried to keep a smile on.

“I could give you the registrations number, if you wish.”

“Is that yours?”

“Excuse me,” Taekwoon seemed to loom over the man as he nudged past him, meeting Minah’s eyes to check if she’s alright “ Minah it’s 8:30, let’s get some pizza.” as Minah sighed in relief as she thrust a registrations card into the man’s hands before hurrying to Taekwoon. He squinted at her in the dim light, pausing as he tried to process the image.

“You’re wearing makeup,” Taekwoon said, brushing a stray strand off her forehead making Minah freeze for a second “it’s nice.”

“Y-Yeah?” she stuttered as Taekwoon nodded.

“Yeah, looks nice.”

“Pizza?” she asked quickly trying to divert the topic as Taekwoon nodded.

“Yeah, sounds good. Wanna stay through the rest of the concert?” he asked, placing a hand on the small of her back to lead her away from the crowd and towards the concert area.

“Mhmm, but not to late. Need to wake you up for breakfast.” she grinned as Taekwoon grinned back at her.

Minah discovered that Taekwoon sounded bloody cute when he was half awake, slurring as he picked up her call, mumbling something incoherently. She had to prevent herself from melting to his pleas to let him sleep just a little longer. It was odd to hear someone who had always been an image of macho masculinity be so...adorably whiny. She steeled herself, breathing out.

“Taekwoon, breakfast.”

“Hmmmm.” he mumbled into the phone. Minah could feel the strong urge to coo bubble up her throat.

“Up, now.”

“I’ll see you in ten.” he whined, audibly rolling off the bed and falling with a loud ‘oof’.

“I made coffee for you, come before it gets cold.” she chuckled into the device as he mumbled something about blessing and ending the call. Soon enough Minah saw him dragging his feet into the dining hall, still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. For someone who had just woken up, Minah had to admit he looked quite nice (to say the least). He smiled when he spotted her, momentarily causing her brain to shut, picking up a full set breakfast before joining her.

“Hey.” she said, pushing him a mug of coffee whilst chewing on her toast “basketball practice yesterday?”

“Soccer and basketball. Need to hit the gym today too.” Taekwoon replied, taking a sip of his coffee as a comfortable silence took over the largely empty space. Taekwoon gazed at Minah thoughtfully before shedding his hoodie, he had expected the morning to be cooler, but it was warm and sunny. The sunlight seemed to catch the high points of her face just right, falling like drops of light on her eyelashes as she absently looked out of the large window of the dining hall. Probably thinking of how long her day was, or whether her spot in the library had been taken by someone else (probably not, it was too early in the semester). There was something oddly riveting about the view that it baffled Taekwoon. It was odd how the two of them, so different in terms of social circles had become oddly close.

Minah eyed Taekwoon, trying very hard not to think of how attractive she found him. This was definitely not what she was expecting, Taekwoon was a distant dream and finding him attractive was only the beginning of painful trouble because there was no way mutual attraction was even possible. She looked back out of the window, trying to think of something that would get the thoughts out of her mind.

Chewing thoughtfully, he opened his mouth to address something he had been wanting to talk to Minah about for quite a while now. There was something about her presence which made him feel like he could tell her this oddly personal fact.

“Minah,” he had her attention, making her meet his gaze, a warm sensation filling his chest “I have an odd question.”

“Yeah?” she asked, sitting straight, indicating that she was listening and taking him seriously, something that Taekwoon found rather comforting.

“Is it… odd that I’ve never really been attracted to anyone? Does that make me weird?”

Minah frowned, pursing her lips. This wasn’t really something she expected him to say, but she was glad he trusted her enough to tell her about it.

“No… I don’t think it’s odd.” she said, still frowning. With Taekwoon’s reputation of having a strong libido, this wasn’t really what she was expecting him to ask her.

“I mean...I’ve never really thought of relationships beyond...you know, sex. There’s never been emotions involved to the extent that I want to be with someone...this whole crush thing just goes over my head and you know, people just think it’s weird.” he trailed off, trying to collect his thoughts, pausing breifly when Minah placed her hand on his.

“There’s absolutely nothing weird about it. There’s nothing weird about you. Some people just go on in life not being attracted to other people and that’s okay. Life’s not a checklist where you tick these kinds of stuff off. If it’s meant to happen, it will. You have your family and friends who are all great relationships to have if you ask me. Your emotional needs have been fulfilled. Plus you have me, which is pretty awesome in itself.” she grinned, trying to lighten the situation.

“How do you know when you’re attracted to someone?” Taekwoon asked, making Minah’s eye narrow, deep in thought.

“I suppose it's different for everyone...for me...they make me really happy and I feel safe around them, and I just want to be with them, spend time with them. I think they’re adorable with all their quirks and oddities. Occasionally I do want to kiss them.” she chuckled “but, as my mum said, you’ll just know when you find them.”

Taekwoon found himself smiling at her, Minah was endearing. It was always a sense of ease and comfort. He enjoyed that about their dynamic. He loved spending time with Minah, she often knew the right thing to say at the right times. Taekwoon reached across to poke her nose with a soft smile and Minah found herself melting.

Yet Minah found herself crying into her pillow that night. She couldn’t like Taekwoon. It was out of the question. Taekwoon was a good sweet man, but with his reputation and his confession of his inability to find someone attractive - there was no hope. It was against logic. It would only lead to heartbreak.

<< previous || next >>

#leo #jungleo #jungtaekwoon #taekwoon #jung taekwoon #vixx #vixxfic #vixx fanfic #vixxfanfiction #kpop #kpopfic #kpopfanfiction #vixxleo #slice of life #romance #college au #jock au

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angstgods · 7 years ago

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WIP Tag:

this one’s gonna be a doozy. i really need people to love me right now lmaoooo

tagged by the love of my life @zeldaismyhomegirl you get that subculture pallet girl, im here for you if you need some cheerleading!

(I’m including five wips. Bell Toll 13, my novel Untitled, a yoi clusterfuck called Serendipity, another yoi clusterfuck called Cabaret, and an Evak tentatively titled Pacing. This is gonna be a long fucking post so if you actually care about my wips and stuff, give it a look, but yeah. very long lmao)

First Line Tag:

Bell Toll:

“Pick up, pick up, pick up...”

“Hi!”

“Oh, thank fuck, Vic–”

“I’m sorry, but you haven’t reached Victor Nikiforov...”

“Goddamnit! .... Oh my god, okay, yeah hi, Victor. I can’t do this. Pick me up. Pick me up right goddamn now.”

(I gave you a few lines but... I mean clearly I haven’t worked on it at all because I want death and if I even continue I have to revamp a lot of it so.... idk be patient with me.)

Untitled (novel): To feel comfortably alone is a state of being few can achieve, incomparable to mindfulness or zen, it isn’t simplistic enough to sum up in a book or a magazine article.

(Wow... so much plot... so much insight... aren’t cha soooooo curious)

Serendipity: A pair of tired eyes and unshaven cheeks prowled down the street, headed for the intersection. With his hands in his pockets, he huffed out a cloud of fog, breath cooling before his eyes in the November wind.

(wow... that could be literally anybody in literally anything.... so specific... im such a genius)

Cabaret: A wide eyed tourist apologized in clumsy French, bowed his head, and stole away into the night with his nose to the pavement. He was looking for something.

(Lmao three guesses who that mess could be.)

Pacing: What he loved the most was that dumb little smirk, the way the corners of that mouth creased up to accommodate it. The degree in which thin lips smirked communicated a variety of emotions outside of expected smugness.

~*~

Any Line and/or Favorite Line (aka teaser line):

Bell Toll: “Yuri!”

Standing a few paces into the hallway, Karl took in his roommate’s bare skin– and the way his arm was folded up to cushion his face against the doorframe– with badly concealed horror. In a state of undress Yuri hadn’t really seen before, Karl blinked from behind frameless reading glasses.

“What’re you doing here..?”

(Say something about my ocs. This whole interaction is golden, you don’t even knowwwwwwwwww the roommate is an easter egg for my aussie buddy.)

Untitled (novel): He processed the familiar bass in that voice he’d heard so much of now spoken from the lips of a complete stranger. He could’ve passed this man on the street, oblivious to how close they were in mind alone. Now there was a body to learn and understand, a thin face with stark, angular features to study, dark eyes to gaze into. Hidden under a strong brow, his eyes could’ve been blue or brown, their color minimized by the darkness that shadowed them, but they were warm and inviting regardless of their color. They drew him in.

“What can’t you learn from books?”

(heh heh heh >:3c everything i touch is gay. what can i say, im a book twink. also, lemme know what you think. i started the demo and ill post it soon.)

Serendipity: (This is gonna be a little long cuz i love this whole section)

With his head hung, Yuuri hustled into the shop at 6:15. His eyes were cast down, avoiding whatever look Charlie wore on her face. She hated having to open alone. He headed fast into the back room to hang up his coat. He was barely finished unraveling his scarf and pulling off his hat when the first customers trickled in. He set to work right away, diligently pulling perfect shots for a few lattes and seeing the early risers off on their days. After putting thankful smiles on three faces, he was brave enough to face Charlie who was standing at the other end of the bar with her jaw on the floor.

“Yuuri,” she started, sifting through her vocabulary for the right words to say, “you are–”

“Late, I’m sorry,” he apologized automatically. “I had a... I’m sorry.” He nervously scrubbed his hand over his face, raking it back through his hair slick from the shower. A navy blue hat swept it back out of his face. The bridge of his nose felt naked in the absence of his glasses.

“Are you wearing contacts?” Charlie questioned, openly ignoring his incessant apologies. Yuuri could feel her eyes on him. He looked in her general direction but never at her face.

“I lost my glasses,” he admitted, thanking his lucky stars that he managed to find a set of contacts at the last second. “Have you seen them?” He chanced a look at her face. She’d opted for gloss instead of her usual black lip today. The edge of her nail poked at the side of her mouth. Her eyes were lidded with a look of consideration, but her brows were lifted. She regarded him with approval he couldn’t recognize as such. He frowned. “I know, I look like a mole. You don’t have to say it.”

“You look hot, Yuuri,” she promptly disagreed. She took in all the lines that made up Yuri’s face. Without his glasses, he had to focus his vision tightly on what he was doing. It made his jaw set and his brows sinche together. His cheeks weren’t hollow and gaunt, but that didn’t stop the high points of his cheekbones from casting shadows down his face. There was something different about the way he carried himself that put it all together. “Did you get laid last night?” she asked, and the shock widened his eyes, making him look more like his usual nervous self.

“No,” he denied, cheeks turning red. Charlie smiled at the chance to poke fun.

“You totally did, don’t lie. You seem looser. Come on, was it your roommate? The… the shady one. What’s his name?”

“I am not–” he shot off with defensively high volume, finishing his thought with a little more composure when a woman looked up from her book,“I am not having sex with my roommate.”

“Something happened.”

“No it didn’t.”

“Tell me.”

“There’s nothing to tell!”

“You fold like a lawn chair. Tell me what happened... Yuuri! Fold! Fold! Fold!”

“Yuuri!”

A cheerful voice cut through the struggle and Charlie fell silent. Out of the snow’s wrath, Victor sighed and loosened his scarf to unveil more of his face. Snowflakes melted in his hair and on his lashes. His cheeks were flushed, but he beamed with a cheeriness no human could possess in such miserable weather. He stopped at the counter, brightly greeting Yuuri and a girl Victor saw a lot but never learned the name of.

“You left your glasses in my car.”

(Coffee shop shenanigans! also Charlie looks like Lauren Hill and I’d die for her)

Cabaret:

“Why do you do it?” Otabek asked, letting the question hang in the air while Yuri slowly picked apart the buttons on his shirt with pruned fingers. Water from the bath spilled over the sides and onto the tiled floor, but Otabek stayed still and peaceful.

“Because I love men,” he replied somberly, “this is the best way to catch their eyes in that way...” Yuri leaned further out of the tub, the dimples at the base of his spine rising up out of the water. He ghosted the pads of his fingers down past Otabek’s collarbones over his heart. His skin was tanner than Yuri’s, warm and taut over strong muscle. “Perhaps someday I’ll find someone who isn’t disgusted by me,” he added as an afterthought, “but that’ll take years if it happens at all.”

(think 1920s france, the soviet union was just formed, jj is an asshole)

Pacing:

“Wait.” His words contradicted his actions, his nails scratched over Even’s scalp, displacing his hair. Even the tone of his voice disagreed with the command to wait. But the last thing Even wanted was to make Isak uncomfortable. Running his nose over the seam between his abs, he froze in place and waited for an explanation. “This isn’t fair to you...” Isak admitted from deep within himself. His brow was furrowed in thought. “I don’t... What if I can’t do the same for you?”

(ill probably just write this as a one shot cuz i dont even really see people wanting this but oh well lol)

And thats my wips! Not gonna tag anyone, but if you like, send me your wips id be glad to give you feedback and PLEASE read me to filth. if these call out to you lemme know!

#tagged #tagged meme #wip tag #wip #bell toll #yuri on ice #skam #evak

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captbarbossa · 7 years ago

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Re: Barbossa and DMTNT

So I saw the new movie for the second time five days ago and because I wasn't bawling my eyes out this time, I was able to discern a couple things regarding the canon aspects of Hector and what may happen in a future movie. I'm still trying to piece things together for how to go forward with Hector so if any of you are interested in rping in my main verse I suggest reading this. I've also made some big connections that are complete fan theory so keep that in mind. Obviously, this will contain spoilers.

Carina Smyth. Can I just say that I adore this character? Seriously, I really want to rp with one. She's her own character, absolutely brilliant and witty, and there's some distinct Hectorisms that she has that make my heart ache. Now, I've always said that the way I role play Hector he wouldn't have any legitimate children. I've said this because my Hector knows that any child he would have he wouldn't want living the life he lived which is now very similar to canon. To me it's always been a source of some consternation because there's quite a few OCs out there that claimed Hector as a parent (and they're all absolutely lovely OCs might I add) but I knew that Hector wouldn't want any of his children following in his footsteps. As in the movie he would deny parentage. The fact that Hector only allowed himself a brief, fleeting moment of being a parent broke my heart because I knew he would only do this in the most of extreme cases. Now that Carina knows who her father was, I know that Hector died happy.

On that note. I do truly believe that Hector is dead. I've seen a lot of people go oh no he's not! They'll bring him back! But unfortunately the directors have stated that he mostly likely is dead although they're not sure how a 6th or 7th movie would play out. I’ve been saying for years that they’ll be killing off Hector so. I mean, how many times can they sell us bringing back someone from the dead? That being said I do believe that there is the possibility of bringing the essence of Hector back and here's where my crazy fan theory comes in: I believe that Hector is Poseidon or at least was a personification of Poseidon. Here's why:

Back in the first trilogy we dealt with Calypso a fair bit. Calypso as you probably know is a Greek god. What you probably don't know the connection of is that Calypso is a major part of the Odyssey with 2 other main gods; Poseidon and Circe. So in the first 3 we see Calypso released and she creates the maelstrom to beat Davy. The movie obviously took some creative liberties as Calypsos main and most common form is a dolphin, not a bunch of crabs but I digress, seeing a bunch of dolphins flopping into the water wouldn't of had quite the same effect.

So in DMTNT we know that Poseidon is obviously a real character - they've now destroyed his Triton and all curses are broken. Here's where it gets a bit muddled but I'll try to make some sense of it.

Carina's book was given to her by her father - she then goes on to state that it was written by Galileo Galilei who was told by Poseidon the proper stars to chart. Hector when he sees the book lets Carina know that it was stolen and her father was a common thief and then is promptly slapped by Carina. So, we know after the fact that Hector is her father and that book was left with her because of him. He states that he hoped she would use the ruby to have some comfort in life and that he didn't think she would make anything of the otherwise useless scribblings. I don't think that that statement is true; Hector gave her that book for a good reason and the reason is that he needed to be freed from his human form eventually. Hector had clearly been to the island of gems before - in fact if you notice, his new clothing was bedecked with gems of all sorts. He had the book, he knew the stars that needed to be followed because he essentially wrote it, and he knew that it could only be broken if his child followed her calling and broke the Triton.

Here's where Calypso comes in. We know she brought Hector back to life but what if it wasn't really Hector? What if it was just a former shell of himself and the only way to bring him back was to put a different, more powerful being into that body? I mean if you look at it, in movies 3 and 4 Hector is incredibly OP. He sails his ship through a Maelstrom, he loses a leg while the rest of his crew die, and he has an uncanny knack of finding people on the sea. It's almost too good for a mortal wouldn't you say?

So Hector is in essence Poseidon trapped. So long as he's at sea he's happy. But here comes along Salazar destroying his fleet. Then a girl and boy searching with Jack for the Triton tip Hector off as to how he can break his own curse. When they get to the island, he's unfazed but a bit sad as Carina fulfills her destiny. As a last attempt of good faith he saves his daughter, and in doing so reveals himself as her father. As he impales Salazar he falls to his death and is enveloped by the sea.

Now in comes Circe. Who is she? Well, we know that she's a witch in Greek myth, and has specific ties to the ocean. Now, Pirates never introduce a character for no reason. In comes Shansa, an actual witch that Hector seemingly knows and isn't asked to give payment of blood unlike most others to foresee the future.

Here's where I think a plot could evolve for a 6th movie; Circe now free of her own curse starts to reek havoc on the ship fairing community. Now that we have Will and Elizabeth back, and we see that Davy is back we realize that Circe has incredible power and can use her powers to do whatever she can to have control of the seas. This is where Hector as either Poseidon himself or in a personification of the sea with help from a freed Calypso fight an epic battle of Gods and Pirate to see who shall last and if the seas will continue to be as bountiful and plentiful for the children of our favorite characters and the ever living, Jack Sparrow.

#;outofcutlasses #hector barbossa #🔱; DMTNT #PotC #POTC RP

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ladyfogg · 5 years ago

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May I? - 5/?

Fic Rating: NC-17

Pairing: Data/Female OC

Warnings: tw: depression, tw: anxiety, fluff, friends to lovers, eventual smut

Screenshot by @ geekygwen

Data and Faith spoke for some time.

Despite liking the food, she seemed to eat very little of it. Data noticed her push the plate away shortly after Counselor Troi took her leave.

"Are you no longer hungry?" he asked, motioning to her food.

Faith shook her head. "Not really."

"Is it your injury?"

"No. I just don't seem to have much of an appetite these days."

"Perhaps Dr. Crusher can help."

At the mention of the doctor, Faith's shoulders tensed and she seemed to physically shrink away. Data studied the changes, fascinated by how quickly she went from calm and open, to closed off and defensive.

"It's okay." Her tone was clipped and firm. "I'll handle it."

"Do you have a personal issue with Dr. Crusher?"

Faith sighed. "Dr. Crusher is nice enough," she said. "I've just never been comfortable with doctors."

"Why is that?"

She did not answer him. Instead, she offered a tight smile. "I think I should retire to my quarters. I'm getting tired."

As she made a move to stand, Data did the same. "I am sorry if I overstepped. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable."

"You didn't," Faith said. "It was a reasonable question. I just don't like to talk about myself."

"It is my understanding that connections are forged through shared experiences and communication. If you do not talk about yourself, how can you connect with others?"

Faith remained silent, eyes drifting from Data's to stare at the floor. "I guess that's something I should think about. Have a good evening."

Data opened his mouth to speak but Faith was already walking away, leaving him confused. He watched her go, unsure of what he could have said to make her end their interaction so abruptly. He then concluded that his question regarding her disdain for doctors must have been too personal.

His gaze caught Deanna and Riker who clearly had witnessed the exchange. He walked over to them, still puzzled.

"Everything okay, Data?" Riker asked.

"I do not know. I am finding it difficult to navigate a conversation with Faith without her withdrawing."

"I wouldn't take it personally, Data," Deanna said. "Faith is going through a difficult personal time."

"I had suspected as much. Counselor, is there anything you would suggest I do to help?"

Deanna and Riker shared a knowing smile. "I think it is very sweet of you to want to help her," she said.

"We have had three separate interactions in the last four days. They have been fairly pleasant and I have found her quite competent in her work. This is a direct contradiction to Geordi's reports from before. I am simply trying to determine where the discrepancy lies."

Deanna looked worried. "She's having trouble with her work?"

Data nodded. "According to Geordi." He paused in thought before joining them at the table. "Counselor, Commander, you know each other fairly well."

"I'd say so," Riker smirked, earning a playful smack on the arms from Deanna.

"Was it easy to get to know each other? While I have had no trouble making friends here on the Enterprise, I understand it is not easy for everyone."

"Well, for one thing, it takes time," Deanna said. "Not everyone can share their thoughts and feelings as readily as others. This makes connecting very difficult."

Riker added, "Sometimes just spending time with a person, even if you don't talk, can help them to feel more comfortable around you. If you do speak, keep the topic light and carefree. Let them share when they are ready."

"Hmm." Data processed what Riker said. "Then perhaps that is the approach I will take with Faith. Thank you both."

He made a move to stand but Riker stopped him from leaving. "Wait, Data, are you saying you wish to get closer to Faith?" he asked.

"I would like to understand what is causing her shift in mood and activity levels. But she will not open up to me if she is uncomfortable. I cannot help her this way."

"Data," Deanna said gently. "It's not that simple. None of us know the extent of what Faith is going through. We cannot force help on her. I think the best approach is to just be her friend. Period. Don't do it just so she will tell you what you want to know."

He considered her words, understanding the logic behind them. He could see how his initial approach might cause more harm than good. Between their advice and Geordi's, he began to develop a clearer picture of how he wished to proceed.

"I understand, Counselor. I will keep that in mind."

He nodded toward them both before getting to his feet. As he left Ten Forward, he pondered how much Faith had invaded his thoughts of late. He had always found human interactions fascinating. Faith was exhibiting reactions he rarely had a chance to witness up close.

She was not the only thing on his mind of course. The mystery in Engineering had yet to be solved. He and Geordi had not been able to find any substantial leads.

No other pieces of machinery had been found out of place. The two that were tampered with had been monitored closely and were found to be functioning correctly. He and Geordi were perplexed.

The Enterprise had also reached the next planet in the Modrore system. It too had abandoned structures like the previous planet, far older than the others. Still, there were no signs of life. Another oddity Data was intrigued to study.

"Most interesting indeed," he said to himself.

He did not see Faith the following day, nor the one after that. In fact, they did not cross paths again until three days after she was cleared for duty. Data was not required on the Bridge and instead took to Engineering.

He found Faith hunched over the center console, eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

"Good morning, Faith. It is good to see you back at your post."

She looked up at him with a smile. "It's good to be back, Commander," she said.

Data noticed the dark circles around her eyes remained and she did not look particularly well-rested. Yet her mood seemed light and her shoulders lacked the tension he had witnessed during their previous interaction.

"What are you working on?" Data asked, moving to stand by her side.

Faith straightened up, rubbing her forehead. "Well, I wanted a visual on where the two mysterious incidents took place, so I marked them on the schematics." She zoomed out of the plans so he could see her markings. "The first took place in the tubes which was easily hidden from view. The second was in a more centralized area, yet no one saw anything. Allegedly."

"You do not believe them?"

"It's not that, I'm just not quick to rule it out that someone is lying."

"A wise move," Data said. "Are both stations still functioning at optimal capacity?"

"As far as I can tell," she said.

Data stared at the visual, tapping at the screen to input his own information. "If we calculate the distance between the two locations, and factor in the length of time between their discovery and staff rotations, it is entirely feasible the same person committed both acts without being seen."

"But they would have had to leave and come back, or hide close by," Faith said. "Which increases the chances of being discovered. The fact that they weren't is amazing considering the traffic in this area."

"There is a two-point-five percent chance they would not be discovered."

Faith hummed in thought. "Small, but not impossible."

Geordi came around the corner, heading directly towards Faith. "Ensign, did you finish running those specs I asked for?"

"Yes, Commander," Faith said, standing straight and giving him her full attention. She handed him the PADD resting on the console. "I was waiting for you to finish meeting with Carver. I didn't want to interrupt."

Geordi looked impressed as he scanned over the information. "Good work, Diaz." He glanced at the schematic laid out on the console's screen. "What's this?"

"Oh. I was curious about the incidents so I mapped them," she said. "The Commander and I were trying to find a connection."

"And did you?"

Faith shook her head. "One was out of sight and the other in plan view. The only connections are they were both Engineering related and no one saw them being tampered with. Though there is a chance it was done by the same person."

"Geordi, I have a suggestion," Data said.

"Lay it on me," Geordi encouraged.

"Would you permit me to take apart each unit?"

"What for?"

"To see if any components are missing," Data explained. "If anything was taken, it would not necessarily hinder the console's performance."

"That's true," Faith said. "Whoever did this had to have had mechanical and engineering experience. They could have easily reworked the console to function without some of the minor pieces."

Geordi considered their suggestion, arms crossed in thought. "That's a leap, but right now we don't have any other ideas. Go for it, Data." He turned to Faith. "Diaz, I'm swamped with these upgrades Starfleet is requesting. Since you found the first console and seem interested in the investigation, I want you to on this. Work with Data and report to me anything you two find."

Faith's eyes widened. "Y-You want me to take-point, sir?"

Geordi gave her a smile, handing her back the PADD. "I'm sure you'll do just fine. Just watch your head this time."

"I will make sure she does not injure herself again," Data promised.

Faith scoffed, trying to hide her smile. "I'm never going to live that down, am I?"

"Nope," Geordi teased. "Let me know if you guys find anything."

As he walked away, Faith turned to Data, fiddling with the PADD. "Guess we'll be working together," she said.

"When I'm not needed on the Bridge, of course," Data reminded her. "Which console would you like to examine first?"

"Let's do the assistant's one," she said, leading him toward the office. "Things are quiet right now so it would be the best time. Plus, I think Geordi has Carver working on the upgrades with him."

"Agreed."

They gathered several tools and got to work dismantling the console. Data noticed Faith was careful, taking her time to map the circuits with her eyes after she removed the front panel.

Data himself was able to scan it much quicker but found nothing out of place. Instead, he watched her and the way she traced her fingers over the wires, lips moving as she spoke to herself. He suddenly understood why it took her longer to do tasks than it would take others. She was meticulous, making sure everything was accounted for before turning to him.

"So far so good," she said.

Data focused on the unit. "I see no signs of tampering. All circuits, wires, and power chips are accounted for."

"At least for the main functions. Let's check the back-up ones."

It took time to maneuver through the complicated wiring and during several instances they had to pause and rethink their strategy before continuing. Data found it to be an overall pleasant experience. Her knowledge was vast and she did not seem to need to fill the silence with idle chatter.

Strangely enough, Data found he wanted to talk. "Have you been sleeping well?" he asked.

"Not really," Faith said. "It's about the same as it was before."

"Do you no longer wish to visit Ten Forward when you cannot sleep?"

"I haven't decided yet. It seemed like a good idea at the time but when I thought about it the last few nights, I just couldn't bring myself to go."

"Was there any particular reason?"

"There were several...Commander, look!" Faith drew his attention to the section where back-up power chips were stored.

Two were missing.

"Interesting," Data commented. "There is no reason for these chips to be missing."

"Yeah, it's against regulations not to replace back-ups. Otherwise, if we don't and we need them, we'd be out of luck."

Data scanned the rest of the components. "I see nothing else out of place."

"Neither do I. Let's do one more sweep and then check the other one."

They found nothing else had been disturbed. Just as they were closing things up, Carver came in to work. Data and Faith got out of his way.

"Do you need to take a break or do you wish to continue on?" Data asked.

"I'm good to keep going. I'm even more curious than before."

"I must admit, I am as well."

They made their way to the Jefferies tubes. Once inside, Faith asked, "Do you want to go first, Commander, or should I?"

"After you."

Faith began to climb and Data followed. "Faith, may I ask why you have returned to using my formal title?" he asked. It was something he had noted earlier but felt the need to address it when they were alone. "Do you no longer wish to call me by my name?"

"Oh, no that's not it at all," she assured him. "I just thought using your name would be too informal for a work setting. I don't mind if you call me Faith but I assumed you'd want me to stick to 'Commander' when in Engineering."

"A logical and astute observation," Data said. "I was concerned I had done something wrong."

Faith reached the landing and turned to face him as he continued to climb. "You were concerned? I thought you didn't have feelings." Her tone was light and teasing as if his words amused her.

"Perhaps concerned was not the proper word," Data amended. "Curious could be considered more accurate. If I did something to offend you, I apologize and wish to correct it."

Faith's face softened. "I'm sorry I made you think you did something wrong. Trust me, you didn't. Promise. I was just trying to be professional."

"That is good to hear."

"You and Counselor Troi have actually been very helpful since my accident. I want to thank you for that."

"You are welcome." Data reached the top and Faith led him to the tube where she found the disturbance. "Have you decided to see her regularly?"

"Not yet. Not in an official capacity at least. She did invite me on a walk through the Arboretum tomorrow."

"You should accept. It is a lovely place."

"I might. We'll see."

They continued on and reached the console that started the mystery. It did not look like it had been touched since they had fixed it. Just like with the other one, they began to take it apart carefully.

"Faith, may I ask what you do for recreation?"

"Nothing really."

Data frowned. "Nothing at all?"

"No. There never really seems to be any time."

"While it is true Starfleet does keep a full schedule, there is still downtime during most days."

"I just haven't found anything to hold my interest," she said with a shrug. "So I gave up trying."

"Maybe you could try painting. I have found it to be most enjoyable."

"I'm not much of an artist."

"Do you enjoy music? Why not learn an instrument?"

Faith sighed and stopped her work. "I appreciate the attempt," she said. "But I've tried already and nothing stuck."

"Perhaps you simply have not found the right outlet." Data paused, noting several wires had been reconfigured. "Faith, hand me the tricorder."

She did as he commanded, leaning in close to examine what he had found. "Am I seeing what I think I'm seeing?" she asked.

"Yes. Several wires have been taken and those that remained were reconfigured to hide the change."

Faith leaned back, a pensive look on her face. "So two power chips and a handful of wires are gone. But why? None of this makes sense."

"No, it does not," Data agreed. "However, I think we should expand our search."

"Why do you say that?"

Data motioned to the tube ahead of them and when Faith turned, she saw a dark smudge on the doors leading to the next section.

"What the hell?" she muttered, crawling towards it.

Data followed and as they drew closer, the smudge became more distinct: a round palm flanked by four fingers.

"It's a handprint," Faith realized.

"Indeed. Now the question is, who or what made it?"

#commander data #lt commander data #data tng #data soong #star trek next generation

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diamondarmored-blog1 · 8 years ago

Text

Just some stuff from yesterday’s post nothin’ special particularly--

@corditeheart Idek, it's so small that people think one comment speaks for the entire fandom

INCOHERENT HOWLING NOISES. I can’t even comprehend this mindset. Clearly I am still a summer child who knows not the struggle of fandom veterans. I was relatively late to the party and it’s still my firm opinion that people can do what they want as long as it’s not in an attempt to overwrite someone else. I sort of assume everyone else feels like that as well, so it’s never occurred to me to take one comment as law.

@ahmyhotdog I can only speak from where I've been. Most people in this fandom are nice. This is true. I've met way more nicer people than not nice. But I think part of the issue is if you don't want to people with certain people for whatever reason then a lot of others just don't seem to play with you as well? Or it could just simply be once you find people you enjoy playing with you just end up not looking for new muns to play with.

That’s true, actually! So it could be partly down to misreading peoples’ motivations for doing that? I would usually assume it’s because our headcanons don’t mesh, though I will say that’s happened to me elsewhere. I don’t think it’s the fault of the collective though, I think there are just arseholes wherever you go. Idk, I hear “x is a bad fandom” and I think of Bloodborne (INB4 SOMEONE IS A BLOODBORNE PART TIMER AND TAKES OFFENCE... @ them, come on, man, you know exactly what I mean here. BB is a mushroom cloud on the horizon for everyone else).

@eruditorem I’ve heard things but honestly ive never seen anything and everyone has been so welcoming??? so idk either. also i dont pick my nose, i pick my butt. i mean... wait-- dont reply to that

Mostly adding this so everyone knows Bri picks her butt

@legendaryturk Hmm. Well I'm kind of newish to the fandom at least for RP, and I think...things just go in cycles? I've seen ups and downs in various fandoms - not just 8, but also ffvii, doctor who, mgs, and tons of other fandoms I've RPed in. overall I'd say ff8 has been mostly welcoming to me? it's small, and tumblr being the animal it is, people may just flock toward others who share similar writing styles or fanon. Idk, if I find I have something in common with another mun, be it writing style or fanon ideas, I'll kind of squee with them over it, but I *never* do so with the intent of excluding others, kwim? that said, there are times where I feel like muns talk around me and there's a joke I'm not in on, but, I think that's just the beast that is tumblr, and not fandom related tbh.

You were in MGS tho//// / ?!?!?/q/1/

That part about not doing it with the intent to exclude is so important tbh. So far, I’m getting the impression that most of it is misunderstanding. I can’t imagine anyone I’ve come across so far being deliberately dickish in that way. Eg, there’s one person I can think of who doesn’t really want to acknowledge me, but that’s okay, cos I know they’re a heavy Seiferx[redacted] shipper and I’ve already said I’m not, so I’d not be much use to them. We still follow each other, though, and I can’t think that they’d be all like YOU CAN’T SIT WITH ME if I spoke to them.

@diosleighrp There's douchenozzles in every fandom who try to dictate what other fans can and can't do. It's quite unfortunate, but there are just entitled brats everywhere.

I can’t say much about this, I haven’t had it! Idk why. Maybe I’m too babbymode for the haters to have found. I have had it elsewhere though so I know what you mean and you’re right, they are definitely lurking somewhere. They’re lurking everywhere.

@lionseed Just like American politics, it's the small angry voices that get the most attention for some reason. Sometimes there's a bad experience, and people take that as proof the fandom is shit.

MMMM and there’s always people with a bad experience to talk about because nowhere’s perfect, so I guess it’s partly on the reader to be on it enough to realise that. I would like if people within the fandom wouldn’t say that about all currently participating members though :( Obviously people can talk about their experience, good or bad, but their experience is with a person, not all of us.

@underplater Okay, so. I will say that what I've personally experienced with the ff8 fandom is a lot of, "oh wow, I really like your blog and your take on the character you're doing. That's wonderful!" "Oh awesome, do you maybe want to do something with her/him/me?" "Uh... Maybe." Which... Means no. And then people are always all, "You just keep doing you, dear, it's wonderful," but no one sends in memes or replies to stuff? And it just.. I always feel like I'm pressed up against the glass, looking in.So I'd say my experience with the ff8 comm has definitely been that it's very insular and hard to for me, personally speaking, to break in on. ... Sorry, I'm fairly sure this was about my comment earlier? I think I was the one who used insular.... Unless, of course, I guess the problem could be me? But if it is, I wish someone would tell me so that I could drop the muses and just stop cluttering up people's dashes.

JJKASHDJASHFGGHFJDSJJHH this hurt me to read and is the main reason I’ve made time to do this reply post rn. I couldn’t remember who said what, to be honest with you and it surprises me that it was you, purely because you’re always one of the first people to come to mind when I think of “the FFVIII community”, you seem like a valued part of it to me, even if you’re not one of the most active. YOU ARE DEFINITELY NOT THE PROBLEM. I can’t really say with 100% certainty what *is*. With the meme thing, I think it depends what it is. If someone reblogs one of those “send me x and I’ll tell you about y”, I try to send it, but if it’s a starter or something that feels thready, I won’t unless I have an idea to back it with, cos it doesn’t feel any different to writing an actual starter for me. I’d rather do that, but I won’t do it uninvited/randomly because that’s putting pressure on someone who didn’t ask for it. If a lot of people do the same as me and don’t mention it, then that could be a big factor because people can well end up waiting for each other to approach without realising it. It might also be something to do with you having multiple blogs (particularly Reno) and that altering your perception. The reason I say that is because I had the exact same thing myself, I had a male muse in a fandom and everyone loved him - mostly everyone wanted to lowkey do him tbh - and I had a female one who got comparatively zero attention because she wasn’t as accessible to such a wide audience. Ellone in particular is a complex character and it’s a sad fact that people tumblr-wide aren’t always into the idea of paying attention to something before they interact with it. Reno is much more easy to interact with in a casual way, since he’s had more exposure in source material and is widely regarded as being a fun, not-serious character (though I acknowledge he very likely IS, and I know from experience that you will have put a lot of thought into him - I love Reno and anything that gives him some substance). He attracts people from further afield, people who might have only seen Advent Children or only know him through fan works. Ellone doesn’t have a movie or much fanfic, and she’s not really subject of the most popular speculation (lbr - by that I mean “who she’s sleeping with”), so she doesn’t have that far a reach. Your Ellone is so valuable to the whole community, you have a hell of a lot to share in your headcanons and your ideas. I haven’t seen you use Julia too much yet, but I’m sure she’ll be that way too. I think you should pick one of those ideas, pick someone who seems like they could pull it off and tell them about it, because I’m so sure 90% if not 100% of us would thread them with you. That’s all I do tbh!! I’m always prepared for someone to say no, but mostly they’re happy to have been approached with an idea to use as a starting point. PLEASE DON’T DROP THEM. You’re not cluttering up anything. I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s sad to see you inactive on her whenever you are, tbh. I don’t think you realise how essential she is. I know it’s a small, slow fandom, but anything you post raises the overall standard for the sheer fact you did it, and it had your characteristic level of consideration put in. Course, I’m probably biased, cos I think I can tell when people work more behind the scenes than out front on their muse and the related background and I appreciate that, always have.

@misplacedxheroics .... I'm hoping this is permitted that I comment, as it was my blog where you read this post. I'm only addressing what I've experienced in the community, not trying to speak for everyone here. In my personal experience with VIII, more often than not, I see a lot of the insular behavior mentioned. Several blogs that start up are made to feel so unwelcomed that they leave or close up shop. Then there are the pass/agg anons, the ones who attack strong female characters (OC or otherwise) and 'correct' headcanons for canon characters. Whoever the person is, I have to believe it's just one single person. But anons have begun to reach out and outright tell people who they can or can't write with, which is baffling. And lastly, I'm guilty of this, and I'll own it -- We also become so comfortable and so familiar with who we write with we don't try out other players. There's also the overlap of muns playing with 'private' blogs. To me, the word 'private' tells me I don't have access to them. So what's the bother in following or engaging if everyone who writes muses that are in the fandom closed off to the rest of us? I can't say how the fandom should be run, I know I'm the least liked person in this fandom but this is my experience. A very polarizing, cold and unwelcoming experience. We need to communicate more among one another, set clear boundaries and maintain community and unity, imo.

I think private is just a word people slap on a blog to make it look legit these days, or as a get-out clause if they find themselves followed by some kind of My Immortal Eldritch horror. Least, that’s what I’ve seen in my travels. Private blogs seem to favour their existing friends, but be open to others who will bring them ideas. I had one blog I called private and that’s because I kept getting people saying “wanna rp?” and I’d be like “yeah okay” and they’d literally say “alright you come up with an idea then”. ? / / //???? Also... I’m trying to word this in the least mean-sounding way possible because I’m not one to shit on anyone’s parade, but if I’m really honest with you, I had to unfollow you on an older blog because you were posting vagues about people so often. I don’t mind when people vent, but it got to the point where it was almost every day someone was on blast and I felt like I’d walked in on a family argument. You can do what you want with your blog, it’s on me to unfollow if I don’t like it, so I did. But. Any oversensitive person seeing it probably assumed you meant them and that might have something to do with you finding it difficult to connect with people. You follow that up by slating the entire fandom when it’s not exactly a fandom problem, which makes people less likely to approach you as you’ve already indirectly blasted them. I’ve had people tell me more than once that you’ve posted something about me without naming me; notably when you made a point of reblogging that one anti-Xu post from an inactive account after saying you hate people who disagree with you “on purpose”. I had just posted a silly Xu support one liner that got a few reblogs. I don’t really have a fig to give whether it was about me or not, but it’s a good example of how a vaguepost causes negative ripples. If one person assumed that was about me, another ten probably guessed it was someone else. I was welcomed to the fandom with a couple of how-do-you-dos and an anon telling me to stay away from you or you’d bully me into deleting. That was the first of several. Then you got that anon telling you to stop sending me hate when you hadn’t (what basis did that have?), and one of your friends for some reason assumed I was the one who had sent it and demanded that “anon” show IP proof, which gives the impression that they’d been led to believe it was me for some reason. I know you said you didn’t understand the logic behind me saying that, but we’re both running Statcounter, you know as well as I do how it works and what the implications are of saying that. It’s also how I know the anons I’ve had that I’ve mentioned are not all one person. Maybe it really was a totally out-of-nowhere thing that person said, but when you combine it with the vagues and the assertions that there’s a split in the fandom that no one else (so far) has detected, it causes bigger problems than it would on its own. I’m not trying to put you on blast, this ain’t a callout post and I haven’t taken any of it to heart - it’s no big deal to me - I’m just trying to offer an outsiders’ perspective because I read this as you being honestly oblivious to it, and if I didn’t I’d either have to ignore your comment or lie to you, neither of which I think you’d appreciate - and I assume since you made the effort to drop in despite not following me that you would want a response.

#ooc.#in which charlie tries not to sound like a massive axe wound but probably ultimately does #you try being me and talking serious talk #the tone never feels right #tbd.#tba.?

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