#they can squish me like the bug I am

[bulkheadbignaturals]

GOODRA ART POST GOODRA ART POST EVERYBODY REJOICE AND CHEER

The brainrot has spread so much i am now making my own Transformers AU

Here's my designs for the main Autobot cast! (for now...... Also i can't design cars for SHIT)

[ratsummer]

So my bestie was telling me the other day about Phantom wanting to practice kissing and I am running away with it!!

It doesn't take long after he's summoned for Phantom to want to kiss his pack mates. Unfortunately, he is a very anxious and not-yet-well-adjusted ghoul, so he agonizes over who to go to for a long, long time. They're all so beautiful, and everyone has been happy to help him, but the thought of kissing them... of being vulnerable in that way... He agonizes over everything that could go wrong for hours on end. After much sleeplessness and pacing around his room with a notebook (Cirrus taught him about decision trees) he finally decides Mountain is the safest bet.

First of all, he sees Mountain kissing literally everyone, all of the time, everywhere. Anyone can see he's good at it. Anyone can see he likes it! Also, both Swiss and Rain have independently confessed to Phantom that Mountain is the best kisser. Mountain has never laughed at him for not knowing how to do something, so he at least almost certainly won't be mean if he thinks it's weird that Phantom hasn't ever kissed anyone. Really, Phantom feels pretty safe that he can walk away from the situation unscathed, no matter which way things go.

So. It's gonna be Mountain. Phantom works up all the courage in his little heart and goes to Mountain's door. When Mountain greets him, he sees a skinny little ghoul (the littlest quint he's ever seen, that might never wear off) clutching his weighted bat stuffy close and barely able to stammer out a hello.

The one thing that Phantom had unfortunately left out of consideration was Mountain's height. Even glamored, the guy towers over him. He's also generally quiet, so he really just has a very consistenly... looming quality to him. Which is fine! So fine! But Phantom is already embarrassed and nervous and this big beautiful ghoul is just looking down at him with his big pretty soft gentle eyes and his sweet lovely smile and it's all so disarming and Phantom is just shrinking in on himself more and more and he can't even say hello to Mountain and he's such an idiot and he shouldn't have come and-

"Hey, snuggle bug, come here. Come back to me."

And, oh. Mountain is kneeling in front of him. He's shorter than Phantom now, but only just barely, and... wow, okay, Phantom can breathe again. And Mountain is just holding his hips and gently squeezing, and his big heavy tail is gently thumping on the ground, and he's still smiling that beautiful soft smile.

It's such a relief to have Mountain holding him that Phantom doesn't realize he's crying until Mountain reaches up to softly wipe his cheeks. And then Phantom is giggling, and his face is so hot, and then he starts crying for real, and he feels so stupid but also so safe. And he apologizes to Mountain over and over, sorry, he doesn't know why he's crying.

And around his gasps and half-stuttered apologies, he finally manages to confess. "I don't even know why I'm crying. I just wanted to kiss with you."

And Mountain is grinning so big and pulling him close, and even though he's on his knees he's somehow still making Phantom feel safe and small. And Mountain nuzzles up under his jaw, and presses a sweet, tiny kiss there. He cups Phantom's cheeks, and tilts his head down so he can press a lingering kiss between his horns.

"I would love to kiss with you, snuggle bug. Should we get in my nest?"

And Phantom can only whine and nod, knuckles white as he clings desperately to Mountain's shirt. He refuses to let go, even as Mountain stands and towers over him once more, stretching Phantom's arms out over his head. Mountain just laughs softly, not mean at all, and grabs Phantom's thighs to pick him up and wrap them around his waist.

Phantom squishes himself as close to Mountain as he can, snuggled up against his chest like a baby bat. He tucks his face into Mountain's neck to breathe in his warm, familiar smell, and wraps his tail tight around Mountain's hips. Mountain is rubbing his back, a deep, rumbling purr rolling through his chest as he closes the bedroom door and turns to his nest.

"Alright, snuggle bug. You're alright. Mounty's got you."

And maybe Phantom's entire body is finally relaxing from being so tense for hours, stressing over whether he should or shouldn't approach Mountain. Maybe his eyes are heavy from crying. Maybe he's finally warm and calm and maybe a big, cozy ghoul is kissing his hair and wrapping a big, cozy blanket around him.

Maybe he can get kisses tomorrow.

[bayeis]

I've joked about it in the tags a lot but I've decided to sit down and actually compile a list on why I'm only half joking when I say my job is conditioning me to be the next Jonathan Sims

The Buried: A lot of my job involves putting people in small confined spaces, often with no windows and and a single, locked door. We frequently have people with claustrophobia that realize agreeing to be locked in a small space means being locked in a small space. 9.9/10 times they are peer pressured into doing it anyway, and have a miserable time

The Corruption:

The Building is rotting. There is no nice way to put this. The walls are slick with mold and soft to the touch, the ceiling drips despite us being on the ground floor of a two story building, the carpets squish with unknown water, and yet people's eyes just glaze past it. Our landlord for the building is a thick accent russian man who, for the past 4 years I've worked here, has changed his name on the emails several times, despite it undoubtedly being the same man, who I have met in the flesh twice before. The first time was to come into the building, shake my hand, and leave. The second time was to ask me to bring him upstairs (not apart of our business but we still have the key for some reason), which I did, and then have not seen him since. Speaking of upstairs, the handful of times I've been there it's just. Bizarre. An entirely furnished office space, completely abandoned. There's everything from paintings on the walls to files still in the cabinets and scattered across desks. I could not tell you what the office space used to be, or whatever the employees that worked there used to do, but I do know it was officially, genuinely abandoned because it was deemed unsafe to be in, from the sheer amount mold and rot. How it is somehow safe for us to work directly below with leaking ceilings I have no idea. I've occasionally had to dart up there with our key to snag a pair of scissors off one of the desks or some other office supply we can't locate in our own half, though I always disinfect them the second I bring them downstairs, and always wear a mask when I'm up there. There's also the bugs. I am so genuinely serious when I say one day I swept the lobby of our building and discovered the shelled corpses of around 300 dead superworms. Like the kind you would feed a pet lizard. I have no idea why they were there, how they got there, or anything. I just swept them up and disposed of them as my coworker watched in horror. Weird worm sightings aside, the building is frequently swarmed both in and outside with bugs, despite weekly exterminator visits. The stairwell to the second floor (located outside) spends about half the year covered in what has to be hundreds if not thousands of moth caterpillars and cocoons. Walking in that back porch area is near impossible as you cannot look anywhere without seeing the walls, floors, stairs, doors all bumpy and withering with the sheer amount of caterpillars (of the not so friendly verity as well. They feel like shattered glass to the touch and will frequently leave a rash). My old manager once found one in her ear. There. Are. Bugs. Everywhere.

The Dark:

Fairly self explanatory. The building gets zero light. The lobby has full glass doors, and walls of windows facing multiple directions but no matter how many blinds you open or what time of day it is you'll find your eyes slightly straining in the just slightly too dim setting. It's never bright enough. When we can get our lights to work (frequently blow out, and when they are attempted to be replaced we find that nearly every light fixture required a different kind of special bulb, meaning that to fix it requires hunting down that kind of random bulb, which will be different from all the others. An effort frequently left undone, dotting the building with random spots of shadows) they don't really help, not because they aren't bright enough, but because the building was designed with weird corners, so all the light the fixtures could be potentially giving, is almost immediately blocked out with odd shaped walls and randomized corners. Some rooms just don't have windows to even attempt to sap out some of the sunlight. The room the employees are made to sit in (about an 8ft by 8ft room) for the majority has no overhead lights, no windows, and like the rest of the building, the walls are painted solid black to sap any remaining light out. The only way you can see in there is from the glow of the monitors and two dim lamps shoved in opposite corners. We get complaints from customers that it's too dark and they can't see well, and we've tried everything to fix it, a desperate combination of lamps LEDs, and fairy lights, but no matter how hard we try, how many blinds we throw open, it's never bright enough.

The Eye:

Remember that employee room I mentioned with the monitors? Workers are instructed to sit in the room (control room) and watch their designated cameras. This is not a security job. Off the top of my head, our (relatively small building floor) has about 30 cameras. There is no where in the building you can be that doesn't have a camera. Even the control room has a camera so we can watch the employees watching people. Some of the cameras are on (all the cameras are always on, with the only way to shut them off being to physically rip them from the walls) but we have yet to find out how to access their feed. The cameras like to frequently switch, in that I mean their security codes, IPs, and registration numbers will jump and switch with each other to no rhyme or reason. When that happens I have to grab the notebook dedicated to writing down whatever this weeks IP numbers are and attempt to metaphorically shove the cameras back into place. We are not a security job, but we are, if you didn't know or guess, an escape room. The entire job, as I previously mentioned, is to sit and watch people freak out through the cameras. Everywhere a guest turns if they look up, there is a camera. Every word they say is recorded and logged. Every action they take is carefully judged. All while a worker sits in a completely dark room, all day, watching their designated cameras intently. I think, for the sheer inherentness of what this business does and advertises, we are the most closely working with the eye. I am one of the managers now, and there are even cameras pointed and trained at where I sit, even thought there shouldn't be anyone to watch them.

The Lonely:

This one applies less to our customers and more to the poor employees. This job is soul crushing. You can go an entire shift, sitting alone in a small dark room, watching people have fun, as you silently observe. I have thankfully graduated out of the control room into front desk, and yet I can go entire days not seeing a soul, watching people chattering as they enter and exit our neighboring buildings through windows that never seem to catch the sun. The "employee area" where we are supposed to be able to hang out in between games isn't really built for socializing. It has been overcrowded and shoved with chairs, so many fucking chairs, that it becomes near intimidating to try and navigate. The most use the room sees is when an employee shoves some of them together and takes a nap, because there is nothing to do. It's not like the employees don't like each other either, we all get along wonderfully for the most part, as well as coworkers relatively around the same age can (helps that we're all queer too), but once you're halfway through a shift, and absolutely nothing of interest has happened you start to drift. A typical lull between games (which can stretch for days in the off season) will usually result in me sitting alone at front desk, answering an occasional ghost call that hangs up immediately when I answer it, an employee sitting in the back area, surrounded by empty chairs facing the graveyard where we write old employees names, and another employee choosing to nest down in the control room, in the dark surrounded by monitors reflecting myself and the other worker being alone, angles scattered across the dozens of cameras. Even when we are busy, there's almost no time to socialize. I still sit alone at a front desk made for two, mindlessly checking people in with no altercation to the script, and the game hosts focus on their game, crammed into the control room with several other game hosts, all willingly silent as they watch whatever designated family they have through their cameras.

The Spiral:

Again, we are an escape room. The whole appeal is to present ourselves as confusing as possible. From room layouts, to our hallways, to the way the building wraps and twists, dumping people out at one door, opposite of where they just entered from, it is designed to drive people crazy. Honestly we don't help either. For our own entertainment, game hosts are particularly obtuse and confusing, partially because we don't want you to get out too early and partially because we have been watching the exact same thing over and over and over and it's starting to drive us a little crazy. People always do the exact same thing in the rooms, there's very little variation from the jokes made the to ideas brought forward. So if the game host wants to keep a little sanity, it's up to them to reek havoc on their game in hopes of startling out a new response, which, if one does occur, gets snapped up and thrown around the control room to the other employees for a slice of entertainment like a sliver of meat thrown to a starving pack of dogs.

The Stranger:

The doll room. Not a traditional "the stranger" kind of presentation, but gives that same prickling unnerving feeling.

In the exact center of the building layout there is a tiny room that is decked in as many old porcelain dolls as possible, all strung up from their necks and twisting around gently in non existent wind. Walking past the only physical door into the enclosed room, you'll usually hear the door rattling in it's frame, or one of the dolls knocking against the door. The room has no vents, no fans, no overhead lights. It's only light source is two red light bulbs, and the room was custom built by our owners. And like, I get it. It's an escape room. There's a creepy room. 1 + 1 equals 2. I cannot even being to describe the feeling this room gives or brings. Almost every time there is a group in there, one person in the group will become more unnerved then the rest, because one of the dozen of dolls looks uncomfortably similar to a doll they or a family member had as a child. The doll will sway on it's string noose as the cameras pick up the trickle of "doesn't that one look just like grandmas doll?" "this one kinda looks like my Betsy doesn't it?" with a chorus of agreements and half given glances, as the rest of the group gets absorbed with the next puzzle, and the single member who brought it up stares, and eventually leaves the room, typically not reentering the rest of the game. It is the strangest thing to watch (no pun intended). Occasionally, the similarity is met with delight, but more often then not it just seems to unnerve. The doll room also shares a wall with the control room, which means nothing, but is occasionally fun to kick.

The Web:

There's the obvious ones, our rooms are meant to trap people, the game hosts jobs besides watching the cameras is to manipulate the line of thinking the customers have, ect, ect. The most unnatural thing to note here isn't the standard workings of an escape room however, but the sheer vast amount of spiders in this goddamn building. I have never seen so many spiders in my life. We can't shake them. From how disgustingly rotted our building is at this point I think the spiderwebs are one of the only things keeping our building together. Again, we have an exterminator come by every single week both in and out of the building. The spiders refuse to let up, every day is a constant battle of knocking down their webs only to turn around and see they've put several more up. We've all but given up on trying to get them out of the employee only areas and now focus our war to the battle grounds of where customers can see to only mild success. This isn't even a regional or habitat thing, no other building I have lived or stayed in in this town has ever even come close to touching the spider infestation happening here.

In terms of other entities such as the Hunt, Slaughter, and Desolation, I can think of a handful of things that might align my job and them, but nothing solid enough that's worth mentioning. There has not yet been anything that reminds me of the End, Vast, or Extinction.

Other things to note,

Quitting is weird? People do, don't worry it's not a genuine hostage situation, but once they leave they are very rarely every sighted by coworkers again. I don't just mean not visiting the building, I mean like going completely off the grid and moving states if not in some cases countries. The entire time this business has been open and operable I've been the longest standing employee, at a record 4 years of the 7 it's been open. I could not name a single employee that has ever truly quit and has been easy to contact again by anyone. If you are able to, it's usually polite conversation with any mention of how you know each other (meeting at the job) being laughed and shut down quickly. No one whose left this place wants to talk about it and I get it, believe me. When we get an influx of summer employees to help with the rush the heat brings, I'm no longer allowed to help train because I would try warn the employees to pace themselves so they didn't experience Game Host Death too early (what we call when a game hosts snaps, having watched the same thing over and over and eventually loosing their mind over it, resulting in crying when told they have to run a game, weird twitching/manic-esque break downs, or in some memorable cases, game hosts just walking out in the middle of hosting a game). This is incredibly ironic considering the majority of employees have admitted the only reason they stick around is because they like working with me but I'm not here to toot my horn. There's also a large collection of employees who are neither employeed nor not, who have moved an hour or so away and have gotten a different, closer, better paying, and enjoyable job, and yet inexplicable will show up once in a blue moon asking for a shift at the escape room for no other reason then they felt compelled to. Typically anyone whose worked here for more then a season falls in this category. Currently we have four official employees for the off season (including myself) and yet if I count this stragglers who all genuinely hate this job (also including myself) our employee numbers easily go over 20. I cannot even imagine what the owners taxes look like for that (all paychecks and stubs are handled by a women who I have only ever emailed and never met). The owners themselves actually don't even live in the same state as us, and we are not apart of a chain. This is the only escape room they own. They're main business? Sheep farming. Which actually, that might be the slaughter right there. Despite working for them for so long, the amount of times I have met them can be counted on one hand. They are completely uninvolved, this business is no mans land. I've thought about quitting multiple times, even briefly lived in another city states away, and yet still found myself back, inexplicably every time I think about leaving again a nice little bonus or raise hits my paycheck, a system I can't really complain about. As for the other managers, I've outlasted several. The only way I have ever seen anyone on the management team leave is to have the biggest mental breakdown known to man and disappear. That's literally it. I've watched it happen so many times. The only employee that came close to being here as long as me was my original manager, who, a couple of months before she left, started loosing her mind, twitchy, paranoid, at her wits end. She isolated and locked herself in one of the rooms for about a month, only emerging at the end of the shift. I tried to approach her once about it and she shaved her head as a panic response. This fucking job, it was choking her from the inside out. Eventually she couldn't handle it and left, effective almost immediately. In the span of a month I watched several new managers cycle in and out, from the women who would sit behind me and silently cry, to a previous employee who realized the jail cell of a role she was being forced into an dipped before the owners could lock the door on her. The current manager is the ex fiancee of the women who locked herself in a room for a month. The horrors are a cycle fr

[homelanderbutbig]

In relation to the caterpillar ask...

I would be the total opposite. The absolute worst influence. Just every time I see a bug I'd be begging him to squish it. Bribing him and stroking his ego.

"Baby pleeeease? I need my hero to save me 🥺"

"I'll make milkshakes if you get that fly for me~"

"I'll love you 10million times more if you laser that spider out of existence 😚"

Y'know, just being like, it's okay to not be gentle when it comes to my worst nightmares. I'd be so happy with him for getting a spider or smth for me and be promising that he did good and how proud I am of him for saving me.

Excuse me for this brain spill ask lol but I would definitely use his powers a little bit to my advantage 😭

Love you HBB 🧡

Lmao, you know what the problem with that is?? He'd start killing "imaginary" bugs just so you can keep praising him! 😂

It'd start out innocent sure, getting to protect you and show off his powers for promises of affection. But once he realizes he'll keep getting rewarded for smooshing bugs, that man would milk it for all it's worth. Seeking them out everywhere you two are. Then he'd begin fabricating the insect sightings so he can keep getting the increased amount of attention you know he'd refuse to let lessen. Not now that's he's accustomed to it. >w>

You'd both be sitting on the couch in his penthouse, a quiet afternoon. Then suddenly he'd laser a teensy spot on the floor, grinning at you. "I just killed a spider for you babe".

"Really?" you say. "I didn't see anything."

"Psssh, who's the one with super vision here? It was coming right for us," he says, unable to hide that smart-ass smirk of his. "It was pretty big too."

"And I believe you owe me a kiss," he'd finally say, leaning over expectantly.

Now you have to come to terms with the fact you've created a needy monster, haha. Good luck convincing him to back down a little. He'd be sending you these texts when you stop calling him "good boy" for stomping on a bug. 🤣

[oarfishing]

hi, Very Passionate Bug Lover here. if your method of killing insects involves going out of your way to cause them pain, a long death, or suffering, yes you are TA. mosquito bit your leg? Smack it, that's fine. It's a) directly harming you, b) its death is quick, and c) you are not targeting its entire species just because you think they're ugly/have no purpose/annoying. Spider is living in the corner of your room so you decide to drown it in shampoo? that is a) cruel, b) the spider never hurt you, and c) go to hell forever.

Every time one of those "aita for killing insects in this very particular way" posts pops out of queue, I get ever-increasingly esoteric submissions about bug extermination. Eager to see where we end up

[buddhamethods]

10 BL Characters I Would Hit With My Car

(I don't have a licence and can't drive so this is just for fun OBVIOUSLY)

LISTEN, I love these characters. They are complex, they are human, they are flawed and yet you can't help but root for them. Or they are just giant assholes.

Regadless, I think they would all benefit from getting hit by a car as a little treat.

Feel free to tag yourselves and participate in a bit of lighthearted negativity and media complaining.

1) Ben From Never Let Me Go (2022)

Of course he would be on this list. Mainly because how are you, a closeted gay in a coming of age bl drama, sitting down in front of a piano next to a beautiful boy and not just completely eat his face in a passionate life altering kiss? I understand that was the whole point of the scene, but personally I would rise above the narrative that was trapping me.

2) Dan from Not Me (2021)

Being a cop, killing Sean's father and selling NFTs is bad enough on it's own, I agree. But Dan's biggest sin was taking the cigarette out of Yok's mouth and depriving us of seeing sad First Kanaphan smoking near a body of water-THE queer cinema experience.

As it turns out, you can be gay and homophobic at the same time.

3) Kenji from My Dear Gangster Oppa (2023)

So you have funky hair and kawnty fashion sense? Oh, you partake in fun bathtub threesomes? What, you're a little unhinged and psychotic? Perfect! THEN WHY THE HELL YOU SUCK AT BEING A VILLAIN SO HARD HUH???

Kenji you better put your helmet on, I'm turning on the engine.

4) Kanghan from Dangerous Romance (2023)

Rich people don't deserve rights in general so Kang was already on thin ice to begin with. But being a bully on top of that? UNDER THE HOOD OF THE CAR YOU GO!

Also he is so attention starved on account of his father being a negligent asshole that he will jump in front of my car willingly just to get a drop of love from dad and Sailom.

5) Yu Xi Gu from HIStory3: Make Our Days Count (2019)

(I'm so so incredibly sorry but I HAD to okay you don't underst- *gets shot immediately*)

6) Mork from Fish Upon The Sky (2021)

I looked at Pond for 0.1 second and fell so embarrasingly in love that for the entirety of FUTS I saw no flaws in Mork's character at all. All he did made sense and I was blissfuly having a great time! So I'm pummeling him to the ground for my own sake I CAN'T KEEP BEING THIS STUPID ABOUT HIM HE IS OBJECTIVELY CREEPY!

7) Vee from Love Mechanics (2022)

Was he in my "I want them carnally" list? Yes. Do I find him beautiful and incredible? Double yes. Am I smearing him on asphalt like a squished bug for causing Mark so much unnecessary pain and heartbreak? More likely than you think.

8) Jiwoo from To My Star/ To My Star 2 (2021-22)

MY BEAUTIFUL BOY!! A crumb of healthy communication is all I'm asking for!

Jiwoo was so emotionally bricked up for the majority of both seasons that it caused ME damage. So me hitting him with my car is both a revenge plot and an attempt to let loose some of those pent up feelings of his.

(But also I'm dead meat if Seojoon finds out it was me behind the wheel. He loves that boy too much.)

9) Zee from Twins (2023-24)

I'm volunteering to do this as public service to keep Sprite and First together without any twins switch drama. One gremlin down, one successful volleyball couple UP!!

10) Winner from Pit Babe (2023-24)

I want to do it as an experiment. I feel like he would make a funny sound under the wheels, like when you sqeeze clown's nose or step on a rubber duck. I would also like to see how this will affect his character. Will he become even more annoying? Will it fix him completely? ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT!!

(This was so fun I love inflicting imaginary violence on fictional men. If you read this far into this incoherent insanity, consider yourself tagged!💖)

[cuttergauthier]

Hockey x Football

I hope you love it❤️

(These photos do not belong to me, this is all fanfiction)

Jack Hughes x Female Kelce Reader

Jackhughes

Liked by Ynkelce, Trevorzegras and more

Jackhughes my girl🤍

Tagged ynkelce

View all comments

Ynkelce I love you🤍

→Jackhughes love you more🤍

Elblue06 you guys are the cutest 🥹🤍

→ ynkelce miss you mama hughes🤍

→ Jackhughes Love you mom🤍

Trevorzegras since when do you have a girl?!?!?

→ Jackhughes dude I told you like 6 months ago?

→Trevorzegras I thought it was just a dream🤷🏻‍♂️

→ Colecaufield idiot!!!

→Jackhughes 🤦🏻

Quinnhughes you guys make me feel so single🙄

→Jackhughes then find yourself a girlfriend!

→Ynkelce Jack don’t be rude!!

Alexturcotte she looks familiar 🤔

→ ynkelce 🫣

Jasonkelce You better treat her right!!!!!

→ Jackhughes always!!!

→ Alexturcotte wait a damn minute….

NicoHischier The team likes her more than you!!!

→ dougiehamilton I agree!!!!

Dawsonmercer 🥹🥹

Joshnorris You better not fuck up, i’m pretty sure her brothers could squish you like a bug!!!

→traviskelce You got that right!!!

→Jackhughes 🫣

Ynkelce

Liked by Jackhughes, Traviskelce and more

Ynkelce Apparently I’m more of a hockey fan than a football fan!🤷🏼‍♀️🤩🏒❤️

Tagged Jackhughes, Njdevils

View all comments

Jackhughes I’m glad!!😉🤍🤍

traviskelce he’s lucky jason and i actually like him!

→ ynkelce hehe🤭

Donnakelce you two are so cute!!!❤️

→ynkelce Love you mom❤️

→Jackhughes Thanks mama kelce!!!

Trevorzegras I don’t like you, you went and stole my man😭

→ynkelce what can i say, he loves me more!!

→Jackhughes trev why am i friends with you?🤦🏻

→Trevorzegras BECAUSE I’M AMAZING!!!

→Ynkelce are you sure?

→Trevorzegras I’m not talking to you!

→Quinnhughes Trevor stop acting like a baby!!!!!

Patrickmahomes I feel betrayed 😐

→ynkelce Sorry pat!!!!!

→ Colecaufield oh. My. God.

Kyliekelce The prettiest girl ever🤍

→ ynkelce I love you!!! I’m coming to visit you & the kids soon!!!🤍🤍

→ Kyliekelce Can’t wait!!

NicoHischier The better sport!!!!

Dawsonmercer DID YOU SEE MY GOAL?!?!?

→ Ynkelce YES, IT WAS AMAZING!!!

→Dawsonmercer THANK YOU!!

→Jackhughes WHY ARE WE YELLING ?

AlexTurcotte Jack forgot to mention the part where you’re related to Travis and Jason Kelce!

→Jackhughes oups!

Colecaufield YAYY!!

Kansascheifs we are offended!

→Ynkelce Sorry admin😐

Trevorzegras Wait… are the rumour true about taylor swift??

→ynkelce I thought you hated me?

→Trevorzegras Will you tell me if i say it was a joke?

→ Jackhughes Trevor leave my girlfriend alone!

→ Ynkelce Listen to jack!!!!

Ynkelce

Liked by Traviskelce, Jackhughes and more

ynkelce Ignore what i said last time football is back to being my favourite🏈🤍

Tagged Jackhughes, donnakelce, Taylorswift, blakelively, ryanrenolds, ellenhughes

View all comments

Jackhughes Can’t argue with that!!

Quinnhughes bring me next time!!!!

→ Ynkelce Definitely!!!!

Alexturcotte Trevor is gonna be jealoussss,

Colecaufield Omg yn I love you for this!!!!!

→ ynkelce 😂😭

→ Jackhughes 🤦🏻

NicoHischier Where was my invite?

→ dawsonmercer or mine?

→ Ynkelce Jack i told you we forgot something 🤦🏼‍♀️

→ Jackhughes my bad boys!

Tysmith Never thought i’d be jealous of jack…

→ Jackhughes it’s because of taylor isn’t it?

→ Tysmith yes!

Jamiedrysdale Oh Trevor is going to love you now😂

→ ynkelce He’s not going to leave me alone now is he?

→ Jamiedrysdale Nope!

Ryanrenolds hockey game next?

→ Blakelively Yes!!!

Blakelively So nice meeting you, we have to hangout again soon!!!!

→ ynkelce Definitely!!!!

Traviskelce The best part was seeing me right?

→ ynkelce sure let’s go with that!

→ Jasonkelce 😂

Trevorzegras YOU HUNG OUT WITH TAYLOR SWIFT?!?!?!?!

Trevorzegras I DON’T HATE YOU ANYMORE

Trevorzegras INVITE ME PLEASE, I WANT TO MEET HER!!

→ ynkelce Maybe… maybe not

→ Trevorzegras PLEASE I’LL NEVER BE MEAN TO YOU AGAIN🙏

→ Ynkelce I’ll invite you next time, NOW STOP TEXTING ME!!

→ Trevorzegras THANK YOU THANK YOU

→ Jackhughes Oh my🤦🏻

Elblue06 the most fun football game ever🤍

→ ynkelce So happy you could make it!!🤍

Taylorswift I love you🤍

→ ynkelce I love youu🤍

→ Trevorzegras OH. MY. GOD. THIS IS REAL!

→ Taylorswift Hi trevor!

→ Trevorzegras sjduywbsudjsj

→ Troyterry so this is why Trevor fainted?!?

→ Jamiedrysdale i think trevor had a heart attack…

→ Ynkelce oups… did you take a video?🫣→ Jamiedrysdale sending it to you now!

[th3fam1lyd1ssap01ntm3nt]

RAAAAAHHHHHHH hello :3!!!

I am

Wondering if you would be ever so kind,,,

To write the monster au(or the hybrid au) of TF141 and I was like oh,,, Gaz no on list,,, who else,,, Johnny. Request thee Johnny, you could add the others for funsies as well, I don't mind the werewolf Johnny I like hims a lot as ,, but like, imagine, Male!user(I don't know what we call him erm male whatever the fuck his name is idk the WHORE sorry he's not maybe? Maybe he is actually idk it's male reader around those sluts 😠😠/HJ....) who usually kept his hybrid features hidden for god knows what reason because it's him??? He's just?? He's a little silly, but like "omg a human on the team grrr!!!" Is reaction from almost everyone until they warm up to him later and then he's just revealed as a moth hybrid :3 moth man, he squeaks when angry because moths can squeak and that's very interesting to me :3 and he just itty bitty plush like and plush size and shorter than them, but yeah they angry thinking he human, get close to the "human", they wake up early one morning, see the man they thought was human, but is a moth hybrid, standing in the kitchen, deadass staring into the kitchens light for god knows how long he was standing there, antennas just out as he's focused on the light, not even noticing them standing beside him, he's just staring at the light until someone turns that shit off and then he's just back like " ! " "When did you wake up???" Like .

PLLEAAAASEEEEEE PLEAAASEEEEEEEEE PPPLLLLEEAAAASEEEEEEEE I BEG FOR HIM TO HAVE SOME CHUB TO HIM I BEG FOR MOTH MALE READER WHO USES HE HIM PRONOUNS FOR THE HYBRID/MONSTER AU TF141 LEMSJWJSJS I want chubby male ones to be loved☹️

Have a wonderful day yahhhh‼️‼️‼️

RRAAAAHHH MY FIRST ASK!!!! (Omfg tysm u don’t know how happy this makes me :3 )

Lemme get this straight.. a moth hybrid! male reader x Werewolf! Johnny (Soap) Mactavish?? Ill see what i can do!!

(Inspired by the Monster AU by whisperrwarm on X, when I say INSPIRED I mean, not everything is the same!)

Characters:

John (Soap) Mactavish: A Werewolf

Simon (Ghost) Riley: A Wendigo

Captain John Price: A Dragon

Male Y/N: A Moth

Just a cute wee pudgy lad :3

Tw: Swearing, suggestive content, Male x Male

Since Anonymous wanted M! Y/N to be pudgy, I imagine that he would have the shape of something like this:

Moth Dust

(A Johnny (Soap) Mactavish x Male! Reader fic)

You, LN, FN, (last name, first name), who would have thought out of all possibilities of hybrids, you would be a moth. Not that its a bad thing, it was just rather annoying though.. you were picked on constantly because of it, your hight, your looks, and what made you insecure the most, your weight.

Not that you were huge, but you were fun sized, the perfect love handles, and the loveliest thing of all, your thick thighs. Aye, its like they say, ‘Thick Thighs Save Lives!’ You tend to hide your moth features though, fearing that a hybrid with predatoristic features might harm you.

I mean.. c’mon, you were a moth and there were damned stronger mutants out there.. its like the food chain with normal animals, and as embarrassing as it was, many things ate bugs. And what are you a hybrid of? A bug. Well.. a domesticated silk moth to be more specific, but still!

Being a moth you were fluffy and small, and well.. adorable. But you never though of yourself as that short.. until you joined the military that is-

“Bloody fucking christ! How fucking big does a man need to be here?!?” You thought to yourself once you actually saw how large the men in Task Force 141 where. There was one in particular who stood intimidated you from his height, Simon Riley, better known here as Ghost, and he stood a strong 6’2”!!

He could easily fucking squish you like the bug you are if he wanted! You were intimidated by the other men slightly, I mean, c’mon! Your captain is a fuckin Dragon for Christ sake!

But wow… boy were they lookers though- there was one in particular who stood out to you the most, he looked like a dog hybrid, but that didn’t seem right for some reason? What stood out to you the most was those elegant.. enticing.. wonderful blue eyes… wait. What the hell? Were you staring? Oh shit, didn’t anyone see you staring at him?

Your mind was racing at the thought of being caught staring. “Did anyone see that? Shit- did he see that?!” You thought to yourself, more like mentally screamed at yourself, but still..

(Not finished, currently busy, will finish soon!)

[thyme-in-a-bubble]

hi love bug! i have angel devil thoughts for u:

angel!stevie teasing reader with his tentacles while she’s trying to do yoga or something and R getting so frustrated bc like >:( STOOOOP :(((( and eddie cumming coming up behind reader and hugging her (but he’s just groping her tits and squeezing her tight) and being like “he’s bein so mean to ya huh baby” with his little fake sympathy pout and you’re whining and nodding as steve’s tendrils trace and tease your puffy folds and eddies begin tracing over your tits as he holds your hips in place so he can grind his fat cock into your perfect ass in those work out shorts feel free to let them have their way with me

reader as she whines about how good it feels

A/N: as a yogi (or technically former, my body sadly can’t flow like it used to with all of its chronic pain and bad joints) i approve of this sluttiness 

∼ gentle reminder that feedback, but especially reblogs are the way you support writers on here ∽

masterlist | join my taglist | devil & angel AU masterlist 

“Stop it,” you grumbled, upside down you reached a hand back to swat away the familiar tentacle, grabbing the chance now that your field of vision was limited to slider all over your most delicate parts, visible in your tight workout clothes, “hey, I mean it! Whichever one of you is doing that, cut it out!” you tried not to let them get to you as you slowly walked your hands up towards your toes, resting there a moment, bent completely like a newspaper, before unfurling your form, “I am trying to concentrate here, relax a bit…” your arms scooped through the air beside you and met above your head. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, why wouldn’t you be able to focus on the flow, on your breathing, baby?” your eyes fluttered shut in annoyance at the sound of Steve’s smug tone, “you just looked like you were about to tip over, so-”

“I was not about to tip over.”

“You sure about that? Because you looked awfully wobbly, even right now,” the translucent lengths continued to slider over your thin outfit as you attempted to block them out. 

“You’re right, she does,” you heard the devil chime in playfully, and the next thing you knew you felt his warmth press into you from behind, making it obvious just how much he enjoyed watching your routine, “oh, I’ve got you, sweetheart,” he breathed into your hair, gliding his broad palms across your hips and drawing them further back towards him. 

Giving up, your hands fell unceremoniously down at your sides, “I am literally just standing here.”

“Yeah, like a flower,” Eddie purred, pressing his nose further into your hair, his hands brashly sliding up to envelop your boobs, already squished and constricted in your sports bra.

“A flower in the breeze,” Steve added, supporting his asinine alibi. 

“I am not in the breeze, I am nowhere near the breeze. I have excellent balance and you know it.”

“Yeah, you do,” you didn’t have to glance over your shoulder to catch the suggestive smirk on the angel’s lips. 

“You know,” Eddie’s low rumble seeped into you like butter on warm toast, “I know something that could help you relax… work up a sweat too.”

“Why do you guys ruin everything,” you grumbled half-heartedly, melting back against his interrupting form as his hands boldly played with your tits, accompanying the sensation of Steve’s tendrils now slither in between your thighs, “I just wanted to do something yoga…”

“Wanted?” he picked up on your wording, “then what is it you want now?”

© 2023 thyme-in-a-bubble

[jame7t]

do you know what to do with all these molted cicada nymph shells

Sure, they're not dead, but they still give off the same vibe to me. You know? The empty casings of a spent thing? Dust gathering in the recesses where something used to be? Sure, they're not dead, but they still set off my Necroentomophobia. Fear of dead bugs! Did you know that? Did you know people could be scared of dead bugs? Whatever. It's not the same as being scared of a bug, sure. But I can be scared of a lot of bugs. Sure, little things, like the humble lady bug- not scary. Butterflies, scant as they are, are only off-putting to me. The beautiful moth? Well, I love it, but I don't want to hurt it. It's whimsical, fat body makes me nervous. I don't want to squish it by accident! Because then it would be a dead bug.

And that's worse. It's like, not precisely a direct fear of a dead bug. It won't leap at me in a defiant rage, or be waiting for me around the scary corner. It's more like a shortcut to existential dread. It's a combination of 'ew!' and 'I am going to die one day' and more importantly, if a bug is dead, something has killed it. And you never know if that something is still lurking around. Just kidding. Do you know what a cicada shell is made of? That's right. It's the happy chitin! I don't have an issue with chitin. We're not chitinous beasts, but we have the enzymes to break them down. Humans, that is. This isn't a science fiction piece. This is my blog. I've always thought chitin was interesting though- it's a natural armor made for little guys ostensibly. Little guys in the sense, that it is for bugs only. Well, crabs have chitin, and they can get pretty big- The spider crab can grow over 300 feet in diameter. Just kidding, it can't do that. It's pretty big though. At this point, you'd think: 'Okay- crab reference, and a direct link to the enzymes to break down chitin. Do we eat them? Should we eat the Cicada shells?' Well, I'm not going to. That sounds kind of scary to me. Would you? Would you eat the shell of a thing? I can't imagine it tastes good. I'm eating potato chips right now. They're yummy, and crunchy, and in many ways- the opposite of the humble cicada's false corpse. A lying bug. A lying, cheating, swarming thing. A bug we don't like. A bug we have to deal with. Don't we have to deal with everything? Would it be easier to show less mercy to the little things? It wouldn't, and it would be mean. And that's worse. Anyway, to answer your question, you turn them into mulch, apparently. Or bury them in a hole. Through my research, those were the only two real options we have. There's also 'add them to compost.' So that's three, you have three options. Do you want my opinion? No? Moving on then. There's also a fourth option- a telling one, at that. A sort of 'secret option' lots of people choose. 'Let them decompose on your lawn.' Right? Right, the easy one? Might as well call it 'do nothing.' Doing nothing is always a choice, sure, but when you give me the choice to 'do nothing' in a game, or choose your own adventure, it always seems like a lazy choice on the developer's part. And sure, from your real life perspective, it's probably the easiest. But from a game design perspective? You have to account for the player sitting and watching. What happens if I don't intervene? What happens if I let it continue? Well, in the case of the empty cicada, they stink apparently. I've never noticed it, and we have cicadas here- but I've been lucky enough to never be out in or see a swarm. A predecessor of mine once recalled a story in which the swarm was so bad, you couldn't walk outside without crushing them on the sidewalks "Ew," is what I thought. Maybe they only smell if there's hundreds of them. Thousands? No, probably just hundreds. Not saying they wouldn't smell more if there were lots, I'm saying they probably start being noticeable at around a hundred. Nothing wrong with that. Not sure what the smell is, though. Do you? You should put them in a hole.

[paracosmic-gt]

Am I Borrower Folcintera?

The title is rhetorical :)

Author: J/June of Wanderstars

Word count: 786

📎🧵🌱🧵📎

Folcintera is something that describes a folklore connection right? If so, I think Borrower folcintera is the way I should go. I look at the way borrower and brownie are interchanged and I wonder if all this goes deeper...

(read on below the cut)

I tried archetropy, but I think this label is the way it's heading. So I'm gonna talk about it.

First I talk about myself. I have my own understanding of who I am that mimics the story of Borrowers everywhere. Beyond my current stature, my life seems to follow a Borrower's existence.

I found myself coming to front in the middle of a breakdown, as we hid in a closet, and I felt safe. Behind walls, peeking in at a house we never felt fully safe in. I've always been on the outskirts and underfoot, even going so far as to imagine what would happen if I suddenly was the size I hoped. I'd run and hide. I often felt that I would be safer with a stranger, with a chosen giant, than my own family.

"Be good to them and they won't squish you."

I am a vulnerable creature, sensitive and shy, suffice it to say I adopted this role wholeheartedly. Fawning and caring for everyone so I wasn't hurt. Hiding in the shadows and the corners, borrowing the smallest favours so I wasn't noticed for taking too much. Constantly stifled in a place I was supposed to grow, until now I take up such little space.

I look human, but I'm not on the inside.

As a child we loved fairies, used to write notes to them wishing for wings to fly away. Now I return to the depiction of a typical fairy and I wonder about how I look to them. I've been grounded, living inside a house for so long, crazed and wild as a feral mouse. How they welcome me into lush forests and calm grasses. Tell me that it's okay, that I'm safe now. That I've survived, and I'm still alive.

And then, well, I met my giant. And he reminds me I'm not all typical borrower. He reminds me that, just like Arietty, I haven't developed a distrust for all giants. I don't have the "sense". Like Sho, we met in greenery and I learnt to trust him. Because he is the one who manages to make me feel safe, comfortable, and loved.

I am a tiny, my size is incredibly important to me. It is affirming and lovely and spreads like vines to make me a bug, a borrower, and maybe even a fairy too. It's born from suffering, but now it is my choice to return to a giant's house. Running underfoot becomes a game, a happy and delightful game, as I re-enact my trauma and reconnect to my own heritage. Because as much as the borrower lifestyle is pain, it is who I am. I can no longer pretend I am human, and I embrace the good, and the bad.

Now it comes to folklore, how others see me. Borrowers as a species seem to share a strong resemblance and connection to brownies or broonies, which are household spirits from Scottish folklore. However, there seems a split between the two kinds in general view. Brownies are associated with Fae, goblins, gnomes, etc. while Borrowers are typically viewed as "tiny people" without any specified powers. Joining the ranks of Lilliputians and tinies everywhere. The depictions of both range vastly online and in literature, from insectoid to rodentish, and magical to mundane.

For me, the line between what I am and what I see depicted of my kind is blurred.

To what extent am I mystical? I don't have magic, but when I get really excited I feel wings buzzing behind me as if I was Fae. Scientifically, I can't exist at my size, so there must be something else inside me. I also don't find it alarming that I am a Borrower who is therian identifying, a lot of my nonhuman-ness feels very in line with being a tiny creature forced to survive on the outskirts of society.

To what extent am I human? I have written stories myself, of a giant meeting a borrower and coming to realise they are the same levels of intelligence and sophistication. I sometimes look it, but inside I don't feel it. I've lived inside a human dwelling and adopted their customs but I'm not a human. And I think my fellow literary Borrowers would agree.

So I am left with a bit of a puzzle to fill, but pieces are coming into place slowly. All I know is that I'm a Borrower, whatever that even means, and folcintera as a term seems to acknowledge all the points I mentioned above.

Another thread untangled, in a complex yet simple appearing web. All starting with giantess comics on DeviantArt and a kid who wanted to fly.

[yeah-w-r-i-t-e]

okay @real-hawkguy was kind enough to provide me a way to watch minority report (thank you again!!!) so here were my thoughts throughout the movie

put it below a break cause i had. a lot of thoughts

aw man i feel sorry for this guy who's about to murder his wife

oh my god what the fuck this man has no eyes in his holes

NO NOT HIS SON I FUCKING LOVE DEPRESSED DADS

this man in the wheelchair sounds like the polar express conductor

this thing with quite literal targeted ads saying your full name as you wall by is a literal nightmare 💀 if the walls kept calling out my legal name every time i walked by i'd never go outside

ummm that scene where john goes through a conveyor belt car factory seems awfully similar to that scene in star wars: attack of the clones...fun fact minority report came out almost exactly a month after attack of the clones...i'm not saying there's a connection but what the fuck

also everyone gathered at the window thinking john was squished into a car as it was being built and then john slowly rising up to look them in the eye is infinitely hilarious why'd he do that

why does tom cruise always have so much sexual tension with old women wtf??? this lady kissed him for NO REASON

NO IS HE GONNA GET HIS EYES SUCKED OUT??? I'VE HAD SO MANY NIGHTMARES ABOUT THIS EXACT SCENARIO

john saying he wants to keep his eyes "because my mother gave them to me" i'm going to strangle him with my bare hands

why the FUCK did they leave a MOLDY SANDWICH in the FRIDGE what the FUCK

MOLDY FUCKING MILK I'M GONNA KILL MYSELF

why are the cops using the mechanical spiders from despicable me...

oh no not his beautiful face...i'm watching this movie for tom not thomas!!!

HIS EYEBALLS ARE ROLLING AWAY

it's a fucking BILLBOARD lmao love that

umm the murder is 12 minutes away but i've still got 45 minutes of movie left...suspicious

i swear i've seen this hotel clerk before. he reminds me of bugs. if anyone knows why this guy reminds me of bugs please tell me

ok i love how we can see visible redness around john's eyes

"I am going to kill this man" with that FACE AAAHHHHHH I LOVE IT

oh my god i THOUGHT i saw the twist coming but then the twist had ANOTHER TWIST

NO THE SECOND TWIST HAD A THIRD TWIST FUCK

ohhh but i should have seen it coming. cause he didn't have a minority report. damn you good movie for making me forget that D:<

NO JUST AS I WAS STARTING TO LIKE THE GUY!!!

tom cruise in muscle tank...

okay i feel like john's line about not recognizing his son at this age is gonna become relevant at some point. but i could just be hoping for too much [edit: i was hoping for too much]

why are the chitauri attacking lara's house lmao

NO DON'T KISS THE UNCONSCIOUS WOMAN STOP okay he didn't kiss her that was close

HE'S BALD?????????????????????????????????????????????????

YES I LOVE LARA

the red ball with VICTIM JOHN ANDERTON YESSSS

stopppp i forgot he's bald:/

okay but why'd he kill himself. what was the point. did he just not want to go to prison??? he would've been let out anyways

OH MY GOD THEY'RE GONNA HAVE ANOTHER KID

aww and agatha gets a cute bisexual bob

[neko-naruto]

new setting (new ideals)

Summary: Wherein John Dory accidentally sneaks into the home universe of Sans after a very small margin of victory in the latest multiversal tourney; things escalate in unprecedented ways after the local scientist sizes him up to scale.

Warnings: swearing, drinking, god i am so sorry for this

Authors Note: @ohposhers @bulliestrolls someone needs to put you two in the fucking slammer for drawing sansdory, and then they need to put me in the slammer for writing sansdory. for the sake of enjoying this fic please picture JD as a lot more creature than in canon.

John Dory was small enough to fit inside of Sans' coat pocket.

Sans discovers this the hard way when the ex leader of brozone falls out of his pocket after his return to Snowdin.

"Ain't snow fucking way." Was what Sans managed as he stared at the unmoving body in the snow, far too small to be considered the average monster for the underground. The Troll would be eaten without a second thought, mistaken for the bugs Muffet doesn't provide protection for.

He plucks the tufted tail and holds up John Dory like he's a dead rat. Of course he snaps awake as soon as Sans is holding him at eye height, and with a screech he's flung aside as the skeleton lurches back.

Sans pauses to catch his breath, "Okay, so you're not dead. That's good."

"Where am I?!" Was John Dory's instant question as he shook the snow from his hair and brushed himself down.

"Pipe down pipsqueak, I won't let you get squished," Sans said as he took a seat on the snow. He held out a hand, "We should probably get you situated with Alphys, size you up a bit."

John reluctantly stepped onto a gloved hand and took a seat on the palm, it was cold and unpleasant. His tail thwipped loudly despite his size, "Anything else in mind to get me back home?" The words are agitated.

"Want me to leave you here?"

Silence.

"Thought so, I'll give you a hand in figuring it out, but you're playing by my rules bud."

"How were you the reigning champ for years on end?"

"The girlies liked me for my dry humor, MILF hunting attitude, and undetermined backstory- and my infinite fuckability of course."

"Must suck not having a dick."

Sans just gives a hum before giving John a gently toss, only a few inches but he still yelps and clings desperately to phalanges when he lands back in Sans' hand. It garners a chuckle from the skeleton, "Pal, I got extremities you couldn't even dream of, and no, that isn't an invitation to start listing 'em off."

John Dory shuts his mouth.

"Don't be shocked if Alphys tries to fill you up with needles and probes."

"With what-"

"She's a curious gal."

-/-/-/-

Thankfully the resizing process involves a lot less probing than Sans said it would, which John is eternally grateful for. He'd like to avoid having a cold piece of metal shoved up his ass if possible. The process just required a small blood sample and some weighing before he was resized with one little ray.

And then he was the exact same height as Sans, give or take a few inches.

"Proportionately, I can see why you won," Sans said, hands stuffed in his pockets and expression same as always. It's far too hard for John Dory to read, he can't tell if it's sarcastic or genuine.

"Thanks." He shrugs off the compliment because he doesn't know how to take it.

"Is it easier to see why I was the reigning champ?" Sans asked.

"You're the furthest thing from 'sexyman' out there," John Dory said before he could actually think about the words exiting his mouth.

Sans laughed, "Tell it to The Onceler, if you can convince him to take me off the bracket then I'll stop trying my best."

"You don't try at all."

"The girlies like me for that."

"What is it with you and the girlies?"

"What makes you think that the guys were voting for me?" Sans shot back, "Think you can walk and talk? I know a shortcut."

"Good point," John Dory said, "I can walk and talk."

"Cool." Sans holds out a hand.

"What?"

"Gotta hold my hand to take the shortcut."

John places his paw atop Sans hand and the grip the motion is received with is far too intense to be considered normal. But a shortcut is a shortcut, and he'll just have to take help to get around this universe until he can get home.

-/-/-/-

"Ketchup?"

"Yeah man, ketchup." Sans tossed a bottle to John Dory as he spoke, the Troll catching it with ease.

"You expect me to drink ketchup? I've had worse, but what about alcohol?" John asked.

"Bud," Sans began, "The bartender is a living flame, you really think he wants to be handling highly flammable stuff?"

"Fair point, but can you actually get drunk offa ketchup?" John asked, and he gave this slanted smirk as he spoke, partially leaning an elbow on the bar. He's gotten more comfortable after a week in Sans' hometown, he lives in the room under the sink in the skelebros household and made it his own until later notice.

Sans gives a hum, "Wanna find out?"

John grins before popping off the cap, "Try me."

-/-/-/-

"What do they put in this shit, Sans?" The words are spoken with a giggle and despite the ache in his head John Dory goes back for more.

"Tomatoes," Sans answered with, still slowly downing his first serving of ketchup.

"It's gotta be more than that, bonedaddy," John Dory purred, leaning a little bit more on the bar and resting his chin in his hands.

A distinct azure rises to Sans' face, "I think you've had too much ketchup."

"You meant it."

"What?"

"When we were in the lab, when you said I looked hot. You meant it, you like me," John deduced rather skillfully despite his inept state.

"And if I do?" Sans asked.

John pauses, "It'd be hot, Sans and John Dory double teaming the tourney."

"Alright, we should get home," Sans said, sliding off his bar stool and holding out a gloved hand.

John Dory took it and slid off his own stool, his tail wagged about lazily. His face is burning up and he looks oddly lovesick, a realization that Sans makes the choice to ignore until he can contemplate it late at night. Alone. In bed. By himself.

The Troll slinks an arm under Sans' shoulders, face resting atop the fluff of his hoodie and nuzzled into the collar of his turtleneck, he still clutches a hand tightly. He gives a contented hum, "Your jacket's soft."

"I know."

"You're soft."

"That's an odd thing to say considering I'm all bones."

"I'll show you bones."

"We really gotta get you home."

"And then?"

"And then you're going to sleep, no goodnight kiss."

-/-/-/-

Another week passes and Papyrus suddenly has to deal with the fact that Sans and John Dory are being overtly romantic.

"Your teeth are cold." John Dory would always say whenever he tried to kiss Sans.

"The girlies like it." Sans would always answer.

And sometimes John Dory would try again to get the usually snapped shut jaw open, or he'd say, "I guess I'm one of the girlies."

They'd laugh and after a small beat of silence continue on with their day.

Maybe it's selfish that Sans is keeping John Dory from a way back to his own universe, but he's pretty sure the Troll doesn't mind. He's stopped asking when he'll get to go back home at least, and Sans is benefiting from having someone around.

It makes the resets more tolerable if nothing else, and Sans just doesn't tell John about them. About the times he's watched everyone die and everyone live, he never speaks a word of it. And unless Frisk brings it up, he won't have to know of the amnesia or the violence.

And they can keep living their happily ever after.

[onenicebugperday]

I was reading your ask from the other day about how disheartening it can be when people hold such an odd hatred of bugs. I thought I might offer a anecdote from the other day. I was babysitting my niece and nephew, and my niece wanted to go outside to play, so I took us bug hunting. She isn't that opposed to bugs but she definitely doesn't adore them like I do. I've really been trying to educate them on bugs to eliminate any fear. While looking around for critters she got very into it, and was shockingly good at noticing the most tiny of bugs that I didn't even see. In our time she would get very excited every time we found something, especially spiders, and would enthusiastically tell me to pick them up. They still have a way to go but I think that I'll be able to show them that bugs are alright and don't need to be squished. Patience and education doesn't work on all people but there are always those willing to learn about bugs which I think is wonderful.

Patience and education doesn't work on all people, but it does work wonders on children. I feel like most kids go through a bug-are-cool phase until they're told repeatedly by adults in their lives how gross and scary they are. I wish people would realize they're instilling a lifetime of fear and anxiety about something that is 99% not harmful.

But anyway! I'm very glad you're helping your niece and nephew to see the beauty of bugs! I am doing the same thing with my nephew and I'm trying to get his mother on board too :P

[inthemiddle0feverywhere]

Crosshair girlies check in are we alive after this double feature because I about died

Major TBB spoilers Season 3 episodes 6&7 under the cut (and yes this is tagged)

What the fuckkkkkk there is nothing comforting about my comfort show omg I’ve been so stressed and I did a lot of screaming (note added after I watched first time)

Rexxxxxxx 🥰🥰

He runs like Tech!!! 🫵

Oh nvm it’s not him

Was hoping for some Chuchi and Echo interaction 💗

Omega with a toothpick!!! Ahhhh she always copied Hunter and now she’s copying her other dad!! I love how Omega just picked him to adopt her like yep you’re my dad now too deal with it

Hunter telling Howzer to stand down after being all accusatory to Crosshair omg they’re brothers again 😭

Still excited to see Howzer again tho. Best hair in the galaxy kinda rude Hemlock thinks he can also pull it off

Oh shit he died!

He’s alive!! 🎢🎢

Why does the clone operator look kinda adorable limping around like a sad lil bug who got a lil squished

Crosshair baby I love your confidence in your “I’ll handle this” but your aim sucks rn babe please

Wolffe!

Oh he’s still imperial 🙈

“You’re as bad as Hunter” “oh I’m much worse” *Nick Miller screams* fanfic writers I need you right now

I wish Tech was here to see it though, Crosshair with a kid 😭😭😭❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

“I’ll draw their fire” NOOOOOOO YOUR AIM SUCKS RN BABE PLEASE DONT

“I don’t know if I like that idea” me neither kid

“Too bad” you son oF A BIT-

Ohmygod

Ohmygod

OHMYGOD!!!!!!

AHHHHH 😨😨😨*faints*

Am I dead?

Crossy it seems hand to hand combat is your best bet rn till your hand gets fixed (get it looked at you stubborn man!!) better hit the gym with Wrecker and get some knife fighting skills from Hunter

Gregor! 🥰

Oh great now I’m stressed about Wolffe’s well being. Glad he still has integrity though

Where tf is Cody?

You think the clone operator surviving the waterfall from such a height was symbolic (🤔🤡) I will not rest till I get real confirmation on Tech’s body sorry not sorry

Crosshair fanfic writers I really need you rn some protective, angsty hurt / comfort reader insert somethingggg im a shit writer or id do it myself

[systembug]

Mantis preservation advice please?

I found a squished dead mantis today and I am incredibly hyped to preserve it, but I need some help.

Is it safe to put it in alcohol-soaked tissue container like with smaller bugs or do I need something stronger to disenfect/prevent mold/parasites? Is it hygienic to keep a dead mantis at all? It has a pretty big soft abdomen with organic stuff.

Are there any tips on how to best keep it? I think it might be getting discoloration on some parts, but it might also be due to the way it died.

Can someone id and sex it for me please? I would love to put a tag maybe<3

Said mantis under cut bc dead